Choose In: Recent Episodes
Roxanne Kennedy Granata
As a survivor of betrayal, infidelity, trauma, and emotional abuse, I Chose In to doing the hard work necessary to see through the manipulation, deceit, and lies that came from being the spouse of an addict. I had to accept that this was my life. The only way to heal was to go through the pain, to see it clear, and work through it. Today, I help others find their way from feeling shattered and hopeless to strong and empowered. You are not alone. You are not the only one that is experiencing these types of things. There is absolutely healing and happiness ahead IF you do what is required to get there. I am the Author of Cutting Ties -Healing from Betrayal Trauma as the Spouse of an Addict. As you read it you will find I don’t shy away from the real raw painful truth. My podcast is no different. We can only become something more if we see the truth with clear eyes and be willing to “CHOOSE IN” to doing the hard work. I’m excited to share everything I know with all of you. -Roxanne Kennedy Granata
Description: Sometimes it's hard to see the reality of our own situation. It's easy to see it in someone else's, but when it comes to us, it's more difficult. I share my own experience of manipulation and gaslighting, talk through how our parts show up in relationships, why we don't see the red flags, what to do about it, and give you things to think about to assess where you are at personally and in relationships.
When we understand what to look for, we feel more confident in taking action. You and your relationships are worth the effort in healing. Your happiness in life, your light and passion, your progress and future development is right here waiting. Recognizing the parts of you that navigate relationships is your key to having the life and future you desire.
If you are ready to reach out and chat about what you're going through, I'm ready to help you. Follow me on Instagram @Roxannekennedygranata and click the link in my bio or Reach out for a Free 20 minute session at Roxannekennedygranata.com
Wondering if Partswork is something you should try? Unsure how it will benefit you and your life? Science is proving that mindset work alone, or too soon, is not healing our emotional wounds. We've got to do the deep emotional work that is stored in the body, so that the affirmations and the mindset shifts will make a difference. Put these in the right order and your life will change dramatically in the incredible, empowering ways you desire.
Wondering if partswork is right for you? Let's find out. Send me an email at Roxanne.granata@gmail.com or DM on instragram http://www.instagram.com/roxannekennedygranata
Join me and my guest Jessica Frew to discuss the importance of finding your voice and using it, becoming stronger, being bold, and taking action. You can have a beautiful, empowered life full of passion and progress, as you take action in your life to have what you desire. It's possible.
Jessica Frew is a BOLD action taker. She has a successful podcast called "Husband in Law" that she records with her husband Matt, and her ex-husband Steve. Together, they are sharing their stories of love, marriage, coming out, divorce, remarriage, and co-parenting to help others know they are not alone.
She owns BOLD Logic, a company devoted to helping people figure out the "What NOW?!" after a crisis in their relationship. Jessica is a firm believer that by knowing and understanding what it is you really want in life you can BOLDly create a life you love, no matter what your circumstances.
Follow Jessica, take advantage of her FREE Workbook, and reach out to her if you would like her services.
https://www.instagram.com/heyjessicafrew/
https://husband-in-law.simplecast.com/
https://theboldlogic.com/freeworkbook
Thank you for listening to Part 5! If you missed the other 4, go back and listen. There is so much wisdom from those who have gone through hard things and chose in to doing their healing work.
If you need help, would like to chat, reach out below and follow me on instagram for the latest helpful tips and info. http://www.instagram.com/roxannekennedygranata
http://www.roxannekennedygranata.com
Nicole Tanner, founder of Swig, let's us in on the challenges she has faced in her life and how God has been with her every step of the way. From Breast Cancer and unsure how to pay for treatment, opening the first Swig drive-thru drink store, going through loss of family members, and the heartache that comes along with choosing divorce; Nicole shares her life with us on this episode.
Swig is all over the country. Her story of how she started it and why is so fun and fascinating. She has taken her success and shares goodness by giving back with her "Save the Cups" Campaign, created to help women fighting breast cancer pay off their medical bills. The story she shares on this episode will touch your heart.
Nicole is a Thriving Mother of 5 amazing children, and 4 beautiful grandchildren. She started Swig in April 2010 because of her love of Diet Coke with lime and she saw that human connection was missing in the marketplace.
Her motto is: Life is a gift. Make sure you make it a good life by loving those around you and doing all that you dream of!
You will fall in love with Nicole and her genuine heart. Listen in to our heartfelt conversation of finding resilience through the hard. You will find strength and feel empowered to do the hard things that come your way.
Make sure to follow @swigdrinks and celebrate Nicole by grabbing her signature drink "The Founder" at a Swig near you.
If you are ready to reach out and chat about what you're going through, I'm ready to help you. Follow me on Instagram @Roxannekennedygranata and click the link in my bio or Reach out for a Free 20 minute session at Roxannekennedygranata.com
Robyn shares her heart-wrenching experiences of how she gained resilience through being assaulted, working through betrayal, choosing divorce, and how she shows up in the world through her many businesses that help women grow and thrive.
Outside of motherhood, her biggest passion is empowering and protecting women through safety advocacy, gathering like minded women together to grow and heal, while having fun.
Robyn gives a huge discount to her safety course! So listen in for the info. Use code ROXANNE to take advantage of her offer. That link is on her website Robynwarner.co
To work with Robyn or to be apart of her community follow her on IG @aflyonmywall or reach out to her through her website.
Her businesses include:The ComeUNITY, Let's Glow, The Brave Talk Show, Multie Vibes, Safe by Robyn, a women's self-defense company.
Thank you for listening. If you need any assistance or in an abusive relationship please seek support. I'm here to help you or give you resources that can. Follow on IG @Roxannekennedygranata or set up a free chat at roxannekennedygranata.com
Join us for an insightful conversation as Kim Brown, an ICF accredited Trauma-informed Certified Coach, shares her personal journey of healing and recovery after betrayal. Kim's wisdom and clarity shed light on what it truly means when both partners commit to healing. Through relatable experiences and heartfelt insights, Kim offers empathy and understanding, helping listeners navigate their own pain with self-love and resilience.
In the second half of the episode, Kim explores the profound connection between grief and betrayal, as well as grief of losing loved ones, offering a powerful analogy that transforms perspectives on pain and loss. Don't miss out on this episode filled with invaluable wisdom and inspiration for anyone on a journey of healing.
Thank you for listening in. If you'd like to set up a free consultation, reach out www.roxannekennedygranata.com or Instagram @Roxannekennedygranata
Read more about Kim Brown and how you can work with her.
Kim has had the opportunity to coach hundreds of clients within her specialized field of betrayal, addiction, and grief and loss, as she has worked with individuals, couples, and in group settings. Her trainings and certifications include:
ICF accredited Trauma Informed Certified Coach, Certified Betrayal Trauma Coach with advanced training that includes working with the addicted partner and couples in a betrayal trauma informed model. Certified Grief Educator, APSATS Candidate
Contact: Team - Choose Recovery Services
Email: KimberlyKirkBrown@gmail.com
Instagram: @kimbrown.coach
Join my conversation with Jamie Scott, Five Two Love mama and creator. She captured the hearts of thousands all over the world as she shared, in real time, the ups an downs, of this emotional time. People from all over the world shared her video and through thousands of prayers she miraculously carried the quintuplets to 29 weeks, even after her water broke at 21 weeks. She delivered 5 healthy babies. With so many invested in her family and new babies, and wanting all the updates, YouTube & Facebook Vlogs were launched.
In this episode we talk about "ALL THE THINGS"! Jamie's miraculous story of hope, grit, resiliency, determination, and faith no matter what comes her way, has inspired many and she still can't believe that she and the quintuplets have lived to share their story.
You can find Jamie on: YouTube & Facebook @Five Two Love and Instagram @jamie.scott
Thank you for listening in. If you'd like to set up a free consultation, reach out www.roxannekennedygranata.com or Instagram @Roxannekennedygranata
Join in on my conversation with Men's Coach Jason Schnitzer. He shares his passion for helping men step into their purpose, win back their wife's attraction, and create a happy marriage. He shares some simple ways to invite the men in your life to come forward and do their healing work, and the important changes that occur when they do. Jason is down to earn, easy to talk to, and was once as he says it "a guys guy". Your man will feel comfortable and at ease meeting with him. Jason is Trauma informed certified, does partswork with his clients, and is an overall great guy to introduce your partners to. You can find him on instagram @JasonSchnitzerCoaching Mention that you heard him on this podcast for 10% off his coaching package. Thank you for listening in. If you'd like to set up a free consultation, reach out www.roxannekennedygranata.com or Instagram @Roxannekennedygranata
Learning to stand up, speak up, and promote empowered decisions, while supporting and cheering for strong women, shows your children they can do the same. If you want them rising each time they fall, standing up to mistreatment, believing in themselves when others don't, and choosing to go after their dreams, it's time to strengthen that within yourself. You are their primary example of how to be.
Taylor Swift is a prime example of rising each time you fall, getting up even when others try to push you down. She does it over and over again. Whether you like her or don't is irrelevant for this. This is about change. It's about being strong yourself, learning why you stay small and quiet in certain circumstances, and how you can start making a difference in your own life and those around you.
Thank you for listening in. If you'd like to set up a free consultation, reach out www.roxannekennedygranata.com or Instagram @Roxannekennedygranata
Learn how to determine where you need boundaries in your life, how to figure them out, what to say to your partner, how to notice the fearful parts of you when setting boundaries, and the healthy and unhealthy parts of you and your relationship. Boundaries are not about being against another person, but rather a way to bring you closer together.
Thank you for listening in. If you'd like to set up a free consultation, reach out www.roxannekennedygranata.com or Instagram @Roxannekennedygranata
Boundaries feel hard and complicated, and we get struck feeling fearful of what will happen if we set and hold them. Learning and understanding the Why's of boundaries will help alleviate the overwhelm and get you feeling excited about how they will add to and change your life for the better. Healthy relationships in all forms require healthy boundaries.
Thank you for listening in. If you'd like to set up a free consultation, reach out www.roxannekennedygranata.com or Instagram @Roxannekennedygranata
When you accommodate bad behaviors from your spouse you teach your children to do the same in their own lives. You can learn how to handle these situations which teaches your children how to live confidently with boundaries as they become adults.
Thank you for listening in. If you'd like to set up a free consultation, reach out www.roxannekennedygranata.com or Instagram @Roxannekennedygranata
Are you stuck in your head overthinking, trying to figure things out, and constantly processing decision making through these thoughts? Staying in your head will cause continuous stress and anxiety as well as creating all sorts of stories that may or may not even be true. Dropping into your emotions, sitting with the feelings you are having, and then allowing those emotions to hold hands with the thoughts in your head; you will be able to come to decisions and take action from a healthier more grounded space... the space of truth rather than decisions based on perceived threat. I show you a simple way to drop out of your head and into your emotions.
Thank you for listening in. If you'd like to set up a free consultation, reach out www.roxannekennedygranata.com or Instagram @Roxannekennedygranata
Why did the masses go crazy over the relationship between Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce? Let's look inside at what is actually going on with the overwhelming numbers following this and how we feel about it. What emotions have we felt watching these events? Tuning into your inner knowing, creating and setting boundaries, and going after your dreams is all covered in this episode. Whether you follow this story or not, this episode is for you. It's your life and your dreams that need to come to life.
We all have those painful times that bring up fear, overwhelm, or insecurities. In this episode I teach you a practical and simple Partswork tool to let go of the burden you are carrying and be able to show up at events or in difficult situations feeling strong, empowered, and able to experience joy. You don't have to hold onto all of the pain. You can let it go and still feel in control.
You are not lazy or unmotivated. You've been in survival for so long. Now that you are safe, it's time to rest, recover, and heal. Listen in and hear why it's so important to take the time to rest and recover after going through hard things.
Let's ask ourselves where we are at? Being honest with ourselves is key. Am I in the hamster wheel of not changing, growing, taking action, working on my healing or feeling stuck in any other way? Am I living my dream, experiencing achievement in self, family, relationships, career? Listen in, and see where you are at, if you want to do it different, and how to do that. 2023 feels magical. It can be a year of transformation that comes with ease and flow. Are you ready?!
The Holidays can feel challenging. Do you have the belief that you should put on a smiling face and pretend all is well until the Holiday is over? I’m challenging that belief. Let’s be truthful about how we are feeling, do things that bring us peace, take action when needed even on Thanksgiving & Christmas, and allow ourselves and others to feel all the emotions that may come up this year.
Finding new ways to heal always brings me joy. Breathwork is a modality for healing that doesn't require talk therapy. But rather a series of rhythmic breathing taking you deep into trapped emotion and connecting you with the awareness that you need to release pain, trauma, or to gain overall peace and clarity. This episode discusses what it is and how you can experience it for yourself.
What do you need to let go of that is holding you captive to feeling your worth and self-confidence? Get curious about that part of you that doesn't feel worth it and doesn't know how to do it. Create a list of who you want to be and what that version of you is deserving of. This will guide you in this season of letting go and preparing you to bloom with new changes and creating a beautiful new part of you.
It may feel like you are breaking and broken and like you are dying in your experience. While that is true in one sense…nothing will be the same as it once was; if you continue to move through and sit with the feelings, it will be an unfolding process into something beautiful, amazing, and you will continue to find more of you. That process brings enlightenment, peace, joy, and relief. Don’t give up. YOU are unfolding.
Even 10 years post trauma, I still find parts of me that show up that need healing. I share a vulnerable experience I recently had and how my continued healing work brought this to my attention. Don't let your wounds stay hidden. As the wounded parts of you feel safe to show up, they will. As those parts trust that you will listen, you will continue to be free. Choosing to heal does not mean you are flawed, but that you value your personal well-being and are worth it!
It’s hard when we’ve been through betrayal to navigate a world where our nervous system is on alert to keep us safe from threats. We want to take action. We want to have control once again of our life. As we heal, our triggers become farther between. What do we do when we are in a public setting and a trigger shows up? How can we manage it? How do we work through it? I use a current trigger as an example to show you what it looks like to feel it and heal it so that you can enjoy all the wonderful experiences life has to offer.
Are you having a reaction to his/her neglect and emotional abuse and then blaming yourself for having a reaction at all? The healthy answer is not to learn to be okay with being treated that way but, rather, learn what fears you have and learn to set boundaries.
When we are barely keeping our head above water we are working from survival and chaos. There is a way to smooth out the water and come to a place of peace and relief. It feels so good knowing it's possible to achieve this. You may feel overwhelmed, unsteady, uncertain, and not know what to do. Listen in and hear how to go from all of those anxious feelings to breathing with ease and finally feeling a reprieve.
We always come to a plateau or stumbling block when we are healing, moving forward, learning something new, and practicing our tools we’ve been given to achieve growth and change. It’s an important part of the process to push through, then take a break and assess what we need next, and then start moving again. Give yourself love through the entire process. Love when you are pushing through the hard and love when you are sitting down taking a breath. Celebrate your wins and let them build your confidence and strength.
When I was 22 someone close to me told me I needed plastic surgery. I froze. I shrunk. And it wasn't even true. My young self created a belief around that and now at age 50 I am finally letting go of the very last piece of it. It will no longer have any hold on me.
Where have you given your power away? What types of things have people told you that you've believed and made yourself small? These things that have been said to you throughout your life and have impacted you negatively don't need to have power over you anymore. It's time to heal them and let them go.
Follow me on Instagram and watch my Reel about my experience. www.http://instagram.com/roxannekennedygranata
How do we take action on something when we feel stressed about it, or when emotionally we don't know if we're ready; yet, we know it's something we really need to do? Let's talk Boundaries.
Making the right decision does not mean you won’t feel tremendous sadness. In an instagram post by @sitwithsharon she gave 9 reasons we struggle to end relationships. In this episode we discuss each one. Listen in and see where you struggle and how you can heal those beliefs and patterns.
What is nudging your heart? What do you need to propel your confidence, value, and self worth to the next level? You are worth investing in yourself in all the ways you need. You can feel strong, empowered, and excited about life. Listen in for ideas on how to get there.
Looking at anxiety with a new lens and how it can benefit us to take action. Sometimes we have to close our eyes and jump. How do we do that? Listen in to find some tools and tips of how to have faith and how letting go of the outcome actually sets us free.
Virtual Classes now online! Visit the website or bio link on instagram to get signed up. Finding new ways to heal always brings me joy. Breathwork is a modality for healing that doesn't require talk therapy. But rather a series of rhythmic breathing taking you deep into trapped emotion and connecting you with the awareness that you need to release pain, trauma, or to gain overall peace and clarity. This episode discusses what it is and how you can experience it for yourself.
Online virtual Breathwork classes are now available! This short episode goes into the benefits, what you might achieve in doing breathwork, and why it’s so important to try something new if you haven’t already. Revelation Breathwork is a modality that takes your healing or awareness to the next level. Take the risk. Try something new. Do it for you. You are so worth it. It will blow your mind. You will laugh and cry and feel the weight lifted off your shoulders that you didn’t even know was there…until it’s gone. Propel your healing, awareness, goals, and dreams to the next level. Classes start April 11th
It's complicated to wish so badly that someone or something was different and sit and wait for them to change and everything to work out. We can hope and wish all we want, but until we notice our fears of why we feel we need someone else to fix this or us, things won't actually change and we won't feel better. As you follow these steps, you will be on your way to taking back your life and find happiness because you made it happen and not because you waited for someone else to do it for you.
When we have a plan for what we want, what our core values are, and boundaries for ourselves in what we will and won’t allow in a relationship, we are equipped with what to do when a conflict presents itself. We don’t have to decide in that moment what to do, we already have a plan.
This customer-facing presentation explores some of our powerful tools that help teachers distribute and collect schoolwork, use apps with their class, keep an eye on student progress, and manage tech in the classroom.
We don't want to spin in what has happened, we want to thrive in the solution. This goes deep into why the solution is our way out of our pain, how to change the negative habit, and the importance in shifting the emphasis on what has happened into what will save us.
We are discussing how to break patterns by practicing being different. Examples that are used are: People Pleasing, why we do it and how to change it, and Letting Go of the Past - feeling it, bringing yourself back to the present, and creating a future.
I took back Valentines Day. Trauma will no longer own me or any other date that brings up past trauma experiences. I teach you a technique to raise your vibration to shift your heart and mind and change the way you view the outcomes of the future.
My guest Ryan Christiansen LCSW, and my personal counselor for many years, joins us to talk about so many important topics. Healthy Boundaries for ourselves, the harm of Rescuing, the need for consistent effort taking action, and how those things bring us the healing results we desire.
Getting what you wish for and desire is possible when we surrender and allow God to work miracles in our life. My guest Kisha Prince, Author of Keep Pressin’ Pretty and After-Divorce Coach talks about the amazing potential and life you can live when you allow God to move you, when you accept in your worth that you are so amazing, and live your life full of impact. You have so much to give! Build your strength with courage and get out there and be the best you possible.
Learning how to notice what parts of us are wounded and how to heal the past can be done with Partswork (AKA IFS-Internal Family Systems) I walk you through exactly what that looks like, why it works, and how to stay neutral when it comes to dealing with the opposition that for sure shows up in our lives on a regular basis. Past wounds do not have to rule our decisions. It’s possible to clear those and become free and clear.
Finding new ways to heal always brings me joy. Breathwork is a modality for healing that doesn't require talk therapy. But rather a series of rhythmic breathing taking you deep into trapped emotion and connecting you with the awareness that you need to release pain, trauma, or to gain overall peace and clarity. This episode discusses what it is and how you can experience it for yourself.
If you really want to change something, or add a new thing to your life, the way to get the best outcome is to challenge yourself in small ways. Those little changes can bring about big results.
The Christmas holiday can feel challenging. Do you have the belief that you should put on a smiling face and pretend all is well until the Holiday is over? I’m challenging that belief. Let’s be truthful about how we are feeling, do things that bring us peace, take action when needed even on Christmas, and allow ourselves and others to feel all the emotions that may come up this year. God Bless you and Merry Christmas.
How do we take action on something when we feel stressed about it, or when emotionally we don’t know if we’re ready; yet, we know it’s something we really need to do? Lots of Boundary work in this episode.
Denial is such a powerful tool. We use it to cope with uncertainty, to excuse ourselves from taking needed action, and pretending that we are okay the way things are even if we are not. We can keep living with our eyes pointed to the ground or we can see the truth and experience relief, freedom, and empowerment. We are deserving of positive growth and an abundance of perspective.
Understanding our children’s mental health needs is just as important as scheduling their dental check up’s. My guest is Maurice Harker CMHC of Life Changing Services. He passionately shares what to say to our children and how to help arm them with knowledge to face the world of pornography and addiction, as well as being proactive in their mental and emotional health. He gives examples and dialogue of what to do and how to do it when talking with our kids. Don’t rely on yourself to figure it out. Ask the professionals. Maurice knows so much about what our kids need! And he packs this episode with his knowledge.
Life changes when we suffer from trauma and triggers. It’s hard to go places we used to go, do things we once loved, and participate in activities that we once didn’t think twice about. We want our life back. As we are healing, those triggers show up and can take over. Being prepared ahead of time can help us stay clear and grounded and begin the process of taking back our life. There is hope to be able to be free again and live life to the fullest. It takes time and effort but it is possible. Tips for navigating holiday travel in this episode.
It’s hard enough to be faced with divorce let alone have our friends and family tell us what we should and shouldn’t be doing. In this mini episode I talk through the judgements we receive and how to handle them.
It’s common when someone who has betrayed us or caused us harm in some way is asking us to forgive and forget. This happens because they will feel better about what they did if we are no longer in pain. In this first episode of our mini series where I will be answering common questions I receive, we go over what forgiveness looks like for us.
The resiliency of women has been proven throughout time. You are no different. You handle so much, do so much, endure so much. My guest Maurice Harker CMHC of Life-Changing Services boldly shares what to look for when a spouse is choosing recovery from addiction, what you are scientifically deserving of, and that your children will be okay. You don’t want to miss this episode. I was blown away by his insight.
When we are standing in that desolate place in our mind and feel paralyzed and stuck with all that has been lost and not knowing how to feel happy or productive again or the feeling of not knowing how to progress and move forward, create for yourself a blank slate.
Repost of Episode 23. Words, phrases, and actions explaining what verbal and emotional abuse looks like and sounds like. Steps we can take to learn and change these behaviors in ourselves and boundaries we can place to keep safe from others if we are being abused in this way
Such a great interview with Christine Baird. She is a worth expert and teaches others through her podcast "The Worthfull Project" how to own their own worth. Learning that and coming to a place of "knowing" that you don't have to earn your worth fills your soul with love as you come to believe and accept that it's already in you. You just have to remember that it's there and always has been. Remembering changes your life. You now know that you are deserving of all that is good and the effort and time it takes to learn, grow, and heal. You are worth it! She says, "I'M FASCINATED WITH WORTH. I'M OBSESSED WITH PODCASTS." " I teach people how to podcast like big wigs, I train teams to become in- house media producers. I speak and write about what it means to own my worth. It's the funnest job I've ever given myself". Her podcast and contact info as well as her full bio is in the show notes. She's a wildly successful capable woman and continues to go after her dreams.
Sitting with our feelings allows us to grieve and surrender to the hold they have on us. This allows for peace as we let go. This is where we change our false beliefs, heal past wounds, and overcome the barriers that have been in our way keeping us from succeeding.
We take key points from last weeks interview with Geoff Steurer on being an observer, and show how important that is in all our relationships. Being an observer gives us information and truth so we can accept and make better decisions.
I am talking with Geoff Steurer LMFT about what signs and actions we are looking for and can expect when a partner is trying to build trust back into the marriage after infidelity and betrayal. We cover what that looks like staying in the relationship and also healing personally whether in the marriage or moving forward without our partner. The insight he shares is so helpful and eye opening, and offers clarity so we can make healthy decisions. Seeing our situation clearly will help anyone wanting to improve personally and in their relationship regardless of what they are healing from.
We come up against a wall; sometimes one of our own and other times someone else’s. In this episode I’m talking about a new way to look at these walls and what to do about them. How do we tackle breaking them down? We will be looking at them from a new angle.
Looking at life, our healing, and what is holding us back from being our truest and best self, will blow our perspective out of the water and change everything! Being completely intentional with what we’re doing and why; asking ourselves the deep questions bring us the greatest discoveries which is equal to adding so much joy. Knowing and learning brings peace.
Excitement is brewing as I go over all the things I want to share with you and all that is coming! New empowering tools and tips.
We’ve got to change what we are putting in our mind so we can create new pathways and beliefs if we want our life to improve and receive our desired outcome.
We want so badly to save our partner or family member from themselves and their choices. It doesn’t work like we want. We end up losing ourself and our sanity when we exhaust everything on their behalf. But there is a way to offer love, tools, and everything, in a way that heals us and helps us get stronger.
I was a witness to a domestic violence situation and I acted. God brought safety right to her front door and offered a way to be saved. What’s on your front porch showing you how to be saved, change, take action, etc? Are you letting God show you how to be saved? And are you taking it?
I took back Valentines Day. Trauma will no longer own me or any other date that brings up past trauma experiences. I teach you a technique to raise your vibration to shift your heart and mind and change the way you view the outcomes of the future.
Noticing the shame we carry and feel when we are happy, sad, or being treated poorly will help us learn how to reject it. We will not allow it to have place in us anymore. Shame robs us of feeling good enough and tells us lies about who we are and what are true situation is. We are busting through shame in this episode to find even more healing.
As we find our power from deep within we begin to change our circumstances. With each step of change we feel empowered with our growth and healing. We begin to feel happy and proud of ourselves. This joy moves us forward. Healing happens. Life changes. And it feels good.
Building our emotional resilience will give us the strength we need to find our way out of chaos and onto finding personal healing.
What is up and coming in 2021 with me and Choose In?! Listen in and hear all that is happening so you don’t miss the opportunity to be a part of something meant for you. You can stay where we are or you can take the steps to thrive personally this year! It feels good to feel strong and empowered! You’ve got this.
How to navigate a child’s well-being when their parent is an addict as well as what’s the impact of the truth and choosing divorce. We cover all of that!
Becoming aware, separating truth from fiction, and finding coping strategies, all help with the unwanted triggers that pop into our head creating stories that send us spiraling. That doesn’t have to happen. We can change the outcome.
The Holiday Season brings a lot of joy and a lot of pain and sadness for many who have gone through or are going through hard times. This episode covers the heartache as well as talks about finding or making a healing home regardless of what’s missing. There is peace and pain all rolled up in one as we navigate life’s experiences.
If we learn what the ego is and why it does what it does, we can recognize what to do and how to manage it. We see more clearly how to make decisions based on our authentic self rather than from the protective fearful ego. Life-changing to learn this skill.
Learning to control ourselves, our actions and inactions, show us the truth. Navigating from a clear head provides action and answers. Staying closed and stuck in chaos prevents us from positive thinking and making decisions.
Pride and ego keep up living in unawareness of what we need to gain, what to let go of, and that we can create new beliefs. Letting down our guard shows us what to do and how; and we gain our purpose. We find ourselves.
We are always moving forward watching and noticing what comes into our path. Sometimes it’s to pause and take notice. Other times we see what action to take in our healing of trauma, abuse, betrayal, or personal limitations. We can find hope knowing that we are exactly where we need to be at any given moment.
Learning to tell the truth of what is really going on in our life. You are worth it to let someone know your struggle. You are valuable enough to not hold everything inside alone. Tell the truth.
Choosing to divorce is a complicated and painful decision. In this episode, I talk about the questions you can ask yourself, the choice of staying, and both the heartache and benefits if divorce is the right answer for you and your family. Ultimately it’s a decision made between you and God.
When we do the healing work in all areas and all levels we become whole. The payout is worth the time, effort, and money. Healing emotionally, spiritually, physically, and mentally is possible as we Choose In to ourselves. You are worth it. God will send just the right tools for you to fully heal.
Description: It is extremely scary to be vulnerable. As we learn the key areas we need it, and develop the skills to practice it, our lives move forward. We get better, feel better, and our relationships greatly improve. Vulnerability is a form of honesty and integrity. It's imperative for growth and healing.
We are looking deep at our heart wounds, talking through how to heal them, and the benefits of love and happiness that come with doing that hard rewarding work.
The walls we formed around our heart were built to protect us. But they will harm us in our present and future, and prevent growth and love, if we don’t heal those wounds.
Learn how to understand where fear is coming from, how to recognize it, and how to let it go, so you can move out of feeling paralyzed by taking action steps to move forward.
There is a way to live your own life and not be a prisoner to the what if's. Learn the phrases you need that will help you let go of trying to control what he does or does not do so that you can be happy and free.
Choosing the healing work changes everything. Everytime you learn something new it's as if a weight is lifted off your shoulders and you feel lighter and free. My husband Garin joins me for a portion of the episode sharing why he does his healing work even though it's hard.
Description: When we are faced with triggers or past trauma, it’s easy to turn back to what feels familiar. Challenge yourself to move through the pain rather than repeat the heartache.
From the words of Brene' Brown, "Courage starts with showing up and letting ourselves be seen"...."Because true belonging only happens when we present our authentic, imperfect selves to the world, our sense of belonging can never be greater than our level of self-acceptance."
Listen to these examples to see if this resonates with you. I talk about scenarios where abuse may not be noticed and I give you phrases you can use to set boundaries.
Words, phrases, and actions explaining what verbal and emotional abuse looks like and sounds like. Steps we can take to learn and change these behaviors in ourselves and boundaries we can place to keep safe from others if we are being abused in this way
We don’t have to navigate and control everything around us trying to make sure it all works out.
With recent events of chaos and destruction how can we open our eyes to what’s happening in our own homes and learn to see things different so we can take action.
How to turn what feels impossible into peace and freedom from the chaos of the unknown.
Asking questions to name the pain that is triggering us, leads to validation and letting go, and continuing forward in our healing.
There is pain and exhaustion after the work is done and the major part of the trial is over. We discuss why this happens and how to navigate to healing
Betrayal is shocking regardless of our experience. The heart does not know the difference between pornography addiction and/or face to face infidelity. What you’ve experienced is worth holding space for. It does not need to be compared to another persons trauma.
“Stop asking why they keep doing it, and start asking yourself why you keep allowing it”
Speaking truth is hard to do and hard to hear sometimes but its the way to living in truth and not continually pushing things under the rug as if its not happening all around us. Staying quiet may protect the one, but speaking out protects many.
Putting our grief on the table, being open to new ways of seeing, brings us awareness and furthers healing.
We are precious to God. We talk about what that means, how we can remember that truth, and how to take advantage of His Love.
You have to “Act” in order to receive the answers you need that will change your situation. Acting for yourself rather than being “acted upon” will strengthen you so you will be able to make hard decisions when needed.
Shaming our emotional brain hinders our progress and healing. Learn to accept both our logic and our emotional ways of thinking to reach clarity and healing.
When panic and chaos suddenly appear, do I react from a place of fear or of a sound mind? What is my body trying to tell me?
Finding our worth by using a list and container to unpack and see clear the steps we need to take in order to uncover our worth and become ready to take control of our happiness.
We all fall short at times. We learn something and then make the same mistake again and again. This episode talks about why this happens and how it's part of our growth and progression.
It's harmful when we try to save another person from the consequence of their choices. If we are in denial of the truth and enable others we are hindering our progress as well as theirs.
It's important to know how to decompress our stress and anxieties. We talk through many ways to combat overwhelming feelings and return to a state of peace allowing clarity to fill our mind and soul.
We are getting real with the truth about how our behaviors are limiting our progress in finding healing and recovery from trauma.
Trauma told me the only way to survive was to see the whole picture. My higher power and the 12-step program told me to take one step at a time.
It was time to accept my reality. The truth was staring me in the face. I needed to heal me...but how?
Episode 1: I thought my Life was a Lie:
As a survivor of betrayal, infidelity, trauma, and emotional abuse, I Chose In to doing the hard work necessary to see through the manipulation, deceit, and lies that came from being the spouse of an addict.
Welcome to the Choose In Podcast!
As a survivor of betrayal, infidelity, trauma, and emotional abuse, I Chose In to doing the hard work necessary to see through the manipulation, deceit, and lies that came from being the spouse of an addict. I had to accept that this was my life. The only way to heal was to go through the pain, to see it clear, and work through it. Today, I help others find their way from feeling shattered and hopeless to strong and empowered. You are not alone. You are not the only one that is experiencing these types of things. There is absolutely healing and happiness ahead IF you do what is required to get there. I am the Author of Cutting Ties -Healing from Betrayal Trauma as the Spouse of an Addict. As you read it you will find I don’t shy away from the real raw painful truth. My podcast is no different. We can only become something more if we see the truth with clear eyes and be willing to “CHOOSE IN” to doing the hard work. I’m excited to share everything I know with all of you. -Roxanne Kennedy Granata