Purpose Without Apology

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When I first launched Purpose Without Apology on September 23, 2019, I had no idea what to expect. All I knew was that God was moving me to share my faith with the world in a new way, so I took a step of faith and was obedient to His call. Over the past two and a half years, the Lord has used this podcast to grow me, challenge me, and lead me to places and people that I probably never would have encountered otherwise. It’s been quite a journey to say the least. As we close out our 5th season of the podcast, I wanted to take a moment to look back and celebrate what God has done.

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Guiding Scripture: Deuteronomy 12:5 - “But you are to seek the place the Lord your God will choose from among all your tribes to put his Name there for his dwelling. To that place you must go…”

All throughout this season, I’ve been talking about the importance of telling your story, and I’ve been giving other people the chance to share theirs right here on the podcast. In this episode, I’m going to “walk the talk” and share my own testimony of how God performed a miracle and blessed my family with a brand-new home. I’m also sharing 4 lessons from my story that can radically change your life. This isn’t about bragging; it’s about giving God glory for what He’s done.
Something Big is Coming: In May 2020, the Lord told me in prayer that we were going to buy a home soon and to think about what I wanted. In April, I felt a strong desire for my husband and I to take steps to improve our credit, and I purchased a course to do that.
A Chance Encounter: That summer, my husband and I ran into a friend of mine at a local park who was a real estate agent. We hadn’t seen her in years. We casually mentioned that we were interested in buying “sometime over the next year or so.”
It’s Time to Go: At the end of October, the property manager at the house we rented emailed us to ask if we wanted to purchase the property. When we declined, he informed us that the owner intended to sell and that we would need to vacate the property within the next 30 days.
A 30-Day Whirlwind: We reconnected with our real estate agent friend, and with her help, we were able to find a new build, find an apartment to live in while the house was being built, and move within 30 days. We moved the weekend after Thanksgiving.
Temporary Discomfort: We chose to move into an apartment that was much smaller than the home we’d rented, and lived there for 7 months while our kids were in virtual school and we worked from home. It definitely stretched us as a family!
A New Beginning: In the summer of 2021, we closed on our home, got the keys, and moved again for the 2nd time in a year. We had a small housewarming ceremony in October of that year, and it was a deeply emotional moment. God. Is. Good.
4 lessons learned from the process:
1. God’s plans really are better than ours (1 Corinthians 2:9). His “not right now” often means a better “yes” later.
2. God gives grace for the doors that He opens.
3. When God opens a door for you, it’s often not just for you.
4. God’s timing may not be comfortable, but it’s perfect.

Action Step: When was the last time God has opened a miracle door for you, either big or small? Have you told anyone about it? Think back to Season 5, Episode 85 (“The Power of Telling Your Story”), and consider how that testimony might encourage someone else. Then, pray and ask the Holy Spirit to give you opportunities to share it.

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This season on Purpose Without Apology, I’m featuring a segment called “Behind the Book,” where I interview Christian authors about their writing process and how they found the courage to write their stories. This week's guest is a phenomenal woman of God named Petra Pindar, and she is the author of not one, but two incredible books called #FaithGoals and Hey, Pretty!

Petra Pindar is a speaker, author, faith influencer and native of Gainesville, Florida. She also graduated from the University of Florida with a BA in English and earned her Juris Doctorate from the Levin College of Law. However, her passion is the call that God has placed on her heart to encourage women of all ages to seek Christ in their everyday connections and interactions. To fulfill this calling she founded the nonprofit Petra Pindar, Inc. She enjoys being married to her "once in a lifetime", Robert, and Mama to her 3 miracles; Jackson, Sterling and Everly.

There are some people you meet, and when you’re around them, you’re automatically strengthened and pushed into another level of faith and love for God. Petra Pindar is one of those people. She is a powerful example of what can happen when we fully invite God into every aspect of our lives, including our writing process. I’m grateful to welcome her onto the podcast today.

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Disclaimer: Lisa Gant is not a medical expert and the content of this episode is meant for informational purposes only. It should not be used to make a diagnosis and is no substitute for professional medical advice, diagnoses, or treatment. If you or someone you know is showing signs of addiction, please seek professional help from a trusted medical expert.

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Trigger Warning: Non-graphic descriptions of infant death

Guiding Scripture: Exodus 1:17 - “The midwives, however, feared God and did not do what the king of Egypt had told them to do; they let the boys live.”

When most Christians think about the Book of Exodus in the Bible, they focus on the story of Moses and how God used him to miraculously deliver of the Israelites from slavery in Egypt. However, Moses wasn’t the only person God used to deliver His people. Two Hebrew women named Shiphrah and Puah became instruments of God’s saving power as well, and their story is also worth telling. Today, we’re learning about the unique way that Shiphrah and Puah saved their people before Moses was even born.
Just as God loves to use our small beginnings, Satan tries to kill our beginnings while they are still small.
1. Exodus 1:8-10 - “Then a new king, to whom Joseph meant nothing, came to power in Egypt. ‘Look,” he said to his people, ‘the Israelites have become far too numerous for us. Come, we must deal shrewdly with them or they will become even more numerous and, if war breaks out, will join our enemies, fight against us and leave the country.’”
As a result, great deliverance is often connected to great oppression.
1. Exodus 1:11-14 details the pain and suffering the Egyptians caused the Israelites and how it was directly tied to their increasing numbers.
2. Matthew 1:16 tells us that King Herod caused a similar tragedy in Jerusalem after Jesus was born because he was afraid that Jesus would grow up and take his throne.
Sometimes obeying God means defying people in power.
1. In Exodus 1:15-16, we learn that Pharaoh specifically instructed Shiphrah and Puah to kill any Hebrew boys that were born, but to let the girls live.
2. The Bible tells us to respect God-ordained authority (Romans 13:1-2). However, obedience to God is our first priority. If the Holy Spirit directs us to stand for God, we must do so (see Season 4, Episode 77).
Sometimes your legacy as a believer is tied to what you kill. Other times, it’s tied to what you allow to live.
1. Now, this is not a reference to people. You might kill toxic mindsets or generational curses, for example, while allowing the dreams God has given you for your future to live.
Obeying God can put you at risk.
1. Exodus 1:19 - “The midwives answered Pharaoh, “Hebrew women are not like Egyptian women; they are vigorous and give birth before the midwives arrive.”
God can take the very thing that the enemy tries to kill and cause it to flourish.
1. Exodus 1:20-21 - “So God was kind to the midwives and the people increased and became even more numerous. And because the midwives feared God, he gave them families of their own.”

Action Step: In Episode 92, we talked about the importance of small beginnings. Is there anything in your life that the enemy is trying to “kill” while it’s still small? Ask God to help you identify things that you’re tempted to give up on and then strengthen you enough to allow them to live.

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Guiding Scripture: Zechariah 4:10 - “Do not despise these small beginnings, for the Lord rejoices to see the work begin, to see the plumb line in Zerubbabel’s hand.”

We live in a world that doesn’t really value small things. In general, we pay more attention to people who have massive bank accounts, huge houses, and a lot of material things. We flock to influencers who have amassed a large following. Here in America, we even like our food portion sizes to be bigger. However, God doesn’t operate that way. In His kingdom, the last becomes first, the weak are made strong, and the biggest miracles come from small beginnings. Today, you’ll learn how to identify your own small beginning and embrace it as a critical part of your story.
Small beginnings start with a need.
1. John 6:5 - “When Jesus looked up and saw a great crowd coming toward him, he said to Philip, ‘Where shall we buy bread for these people to eat?’”
2. John 6:7 - “Philip answered him, ‘It would take more than half a year’s wages to buy enough bread for each one to have a bite!’”
3. Note: Your need must be something that’s out of your control. If you repeatedly refuse to create and stick to a budget, for example, you don’t need a financial miracle from God; you need discipline.
Small beginnings don’t make logical sense.
1. John 6:8-9 - “Another of his disciples, Andrew, Simon Peter’s brother, spoke up, ‘Here is a boy with five small barley loaves and two small fish, but how far will they go among so many?’”
Small beginnings multiply with God’s blessing.
1. John 6:13 - “So they gathered them [the leftover pieces] and filled twelve baskets with the pieces of the five barley loaves left over by those who had eaten.”
What to do with your small beginning:
1. Be still and get instructions from God. (John 6:10)
2. Use what you have. (John 6:8-9)
3. Put what you have in God’s hands. (John 6:11)
4. Don’t let anything go to waste. (John 6:12-13)
God prefers small beginnings because they bring the most glory to Him.
1. John 6:14 - “After the people saw the sign Jesus performed, they began to say, ‘Surely this is the Prophet who is to come into the world.’”

Action Step: Based on what you’ve learned in this episode, identify at least one area in your life that looks like a “small beginning.” How can you honor God in that area now as you wait for Him to move? Ask Him for instructions about how to best steward what He has given you.

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Guiding Scripture: Genesis 29:16-17 - “Now Laban had two daughters; the name of the older was Leah, and the name of the younger was Rachel. Leah had weak eyes, but Rachel had a lovely figure and was beautiful.”

In my humble opinion, anyone who says the Bible is boring clearly hasn’t read the book of Genesis. There is more drama, deception, and backstabbing in those chapters than in any soap opera on TV today, and nowhere is that drama more evident than in the story of Rachel and Leah. Between the two of them, these rival sisters became the mothers of the twelve tribes of Israel, and their story is proof-positive that God can use literally anyone for His purposes, no matter how broken, bitter, or discouraged we may be.
Rachel and Leah were both victims of their father Laban’s deceit.
1. In Genesis 29, Jacob falls in love with Rachel and agrees to work for seven years in exchange for her hand in marriage. However, Laban gives his older daughter Leah to Jacob during the marriage ceremony instead, deceiving him.
2. Leah was forced to marry a man who was in love with her sister, while Rachel was forced to watch them be married for seven years and then share Jacob with Leah forever.
Rachel and Leah were both unhappy in their marriage for different reasons.
1. Genesis 29:31 sums up the sisters’ predicament: Leah was fertile but unloved, while Rachel was loved but infertile.
The sisters’ desires made them bitter rivals.
1. Leah literally names her children based on her desire to be loved by Jacob (Genesis 29:32-34, Genesis 30:17-20).
2. Rachel literally tells Jacob that she would rather die than be unable to conceive (Genesis 30:1).
3. Later, when her servant Bilhah conceives (more on that later), she names the child Naphtali, which means my struggle because she said, “I have had a great struggle with my sister, and I have won.” (Genesis 30:7-8)
They used manipulation to get what they wanted.
1. Rachel gave her servant Bilhah to Jacob to sleep with so she could have children through her (Genesis 30:3).
2. Later, after she stops having children, Leah does the same thing with her servant Zilpah (Genesis 30:9).
3. During the wheat harvest season, Leah gave Rachel mandrakes (which were believed at that time to improve fertility) in order to have a night to sleep with Jacob (Genesis 30:16).
They both put their desires ahead of God—and paid a heavy price for it.
1. Leah never received the love from Jacob that she wanted so badly. In fact, his favoritism for Rachel extends to her children and causes great conflict among their sons (which is another story for another day).
2. Although the Lord eventually gave Rachel two sons, her second delivery was so difficult that she died in childbirth, and named her son, Ben-Oni as a result (which means “son of my trouble”).
Despite their flaws, God heard—and honored—both of their prayers.
1. The Lord enabled Leah to conceive because he saw that she was unloved (Genesis 29:31).
2. Similarly, the Lord “remembered” Rachel and “listened to her” so that she conceived many years later (Genesis 30:22).

Action Step: Has there ever been a time when you felt unloved or unappreciated by others? Or, have you ever received favoritism that you didn’t earn? How did that situation make you feel? Were you tempted to believe that everything would be better if your situation was different? Did you try to change things on your own, or did you submit your concerns to God? How might you handle things differently if you find yourself in a similar situation in the future?

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Guiding Scripture: Romans 10:15 - “And how can anyone preach unless they are sent? As it is written: ‘How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!’”

When many people think about sharing their stories with others, they feel overwhelmed and intimidated. They worry about what they will say and whether or not they’ll be rejected for it. Some even wonder if they have a story worth telling. I’m here to tell you that your story is more valuable than you know. Today, we’re going to talk about how to embrace your story and move forward in telling it with confidence.
Recognize that God is sending you.
1. John 20:21 - “Again Jesus said, ‘Peace be with you! As the Father has sent me, I am sending you.’”
2. When you know that God Himself, the creator of the universe, is sending you as His ambassador for His kingdom, it empowers you because you realize that you are representing Him, not yourself.
Value your uniqueness.
1. Psalm 139:14 - “I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”
2. There has never been a person in the entire world who looks, thinks, sounds, acts, or feels like you do. You had a 1 in 400 trillion chance of being born. No one else can share your story in exactly the way you can.
Be authentic.
1. Be careful about filtering your story based on what other people might think. Sometimes the parts of your story that you feel ashamed of are the parts that can bring freedom to others.
2. At the same time, use wisdom about what you share and with whom you share it. There’s a fine line between being transparent and oversharing.
Understand that the need is great.
1. Matthew 9:37-38 - “Then he said to his disciples, ‘The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field.’”
Be confident that the Holy Spirit will help you tell your story.
1. Luke 12:12 - “for the Holy Spirit will teach you at that time what you should say.”
2. Matthew 10:20 - “for it will not be you speaking, but the Spirit of your Father speaking through you.”
3. 1 Corinthians 3:7-9 - “So neither the one who plants nor the one who waters is anything, but only God, who makes things grow. The one who plants and the one who waters have one purpose, and they will each be rewarded according to their own labor. For we are co-workers in God’s service; you are God’s field, God’s building.”
4. Many of us put pressure on ourselves to tell our stories “perfectly,” but Scripture allows us to completely take the pressure off of ourselves. It is the Holy Spirit who brings people to the Cross; our job is only to show them the way.

Action Step: Ask yourself honestly if you are embracing your testimony and looking for ways to share it with others. If so, how can you apply the principles in today’s episode to be even more effective? If you’re not sharing it, what can you do differently to get more comfortable with doing so? Ask the Holy Spirit for boldness to help you with this process.

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Guiding Scripture: Genesis 16:13 - “She gave this name to the Lord who spoke to her: ‘You are the God who sees me,” for she said, “I have now seen[a] the One who sees me.’”

Hidden in the pages of Genesis, in-between a well-told narrative about the faith of Abraham and Sarah, lies the story of an Egyptian slave named Hagar. We don’t know much about her aside from her connection to Abraham and Sarah, and she is often used as a cautionary tale about what happens when you try to get ahead of God’s timing. However, the reality is that Hagar’s story is far more complex, and we’ll be exploring some of those complexities today.
Hagar was a victim of circumstances outside of her control.
- She was an enslaved Egyptian woman who was forced to sleep with Abraham so she could conceive a son for Sarah (Genesis 16:1-3).
- We know Hagar wasn’t happy about this because she hated Sarah after she got pregnant (Genesis 16:4).
Hagar’s story shows how others can be hurt by our disobedience.
- Sarah mistreated Hagar after she got pregnant by Abraham, so much so that Hagar ran away from her (Genesis 16:6).
- Years later, after Sarah had given birth to Isaac and saw Ishmael mocking him, she demanded that both Hagar and Ishmael be sent away into the desert (Genesis 21:9-10).
- Some Biblical scholars suggest that since Hagar was Egyptian, she may have been one of the slaves given to Abraham after his time in Egypt (Genesis 12:16)---when he lied about Sarah being his sister instead of his wife. In other words, Hagar might not have even been available for Abraham to sleep with if he hadn’t deceived Pharaoh in Egypt.
God saw Hagar and cared about her when others didn’t.
- The Angel of the Lord appears to Hagar, signifying her importance to Him (Genesis 16:7).
- Although God tells Hagar to go back to Sarah, he never rebukes or shames her for her situation. In fact, he blesses her and gives her son the name Ishmael, which means “God hears” (Genesis 16:9-11).
God can and does use our brokenness for His glorious purposes.
- When Joseph is sold as a slave by his brothers several generations later, the men who purchase him are Ishmaelities, the descendants of Ishmael (Genesis 37:28).

Action Step: Consider the moments in your life when you’ve felt like an outsider. Did you ever feel like God didn’t know about your struggles, or even worse—didn’t care about them? Take some time in prayer today to talk with God about those moments and ask Him to heal you from that pain. Also, consider getting Christian-based counseling to help you process that rejection in a healthy way.

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Guiding Scripture: Revelation 12:11 - “They triumphed over him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony; they did not love their lives so much as to shrink from death.”

Everyone has a story—including you—and your story is completely, one hundred percent unique to you. There is no one in the world who shares your exact combination of gifts, flaws, experiences, or opinions. God designed you with all of these things in mind, and His plan is for your story to have a powerful impact on the world. So the question is, are you ready to tell your story without apology?
What is your story?
- It’s either a challenge you’ve overcome or something good that you’ve achieved.
- It impacts other people around you in some way, either in religious or secular spaces or both.
- It always brings glory and honor to God.
- Ex. My story about depression
Why it’s important to tell your story:
- It brings glory to God. (Matthew 5:16)
- It is part of the Great Commission. (Acts 1:8)
- It encourages and strengthens everyone who hears it (Revelation 12:11).
- It is healing for us to share our stories. (James 5:16)
3 ways to tell your story in 2022:
- Share your story. This is probably the easiest and most accessible way to tell your story with others. It simply involves you telling people in your sphere of influence what God has done for you, such as friends, family members, coworkers, etc.
- Write your story. This doesn’t literally have to be in the form of a book. It can also include blog posts, plays, movies, songs, paintings, or any other art form that God inspires you to use.
- Declare your story. This often involves a form of public speaking.
4 signs you may be ready to tell your story:
- You’ve gone through Christian-based therapy or counseling to help you heal from any trauma you’ve experienced.
- You have a healthy community that is supportive and encourages you to tell it.
- You have a strong sense of boundaries concerning what you feel comfortable sharing.
- You feel that God is prompting you to share it.
Key Point: At the end of the day, only you know for sure if you’re really ready to tell your story. Never let anyone pressure you into sharing before you’re ready.

Action Step: Take at least 30 minutes to spend quiet time with God, and ask Him what testimony He has given you that you can share with the world. If you see the signs listed above in your own life and feel comfortable, begin moving forward with sharing your story, following the leading of the Holy Spirit.

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Guiding Scripture: “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” (Luke 10:41-42)
As women, we usually do a lot of juggling in our households. Many of us have to manage working, cooking, cleaning, and taking care of children and other family members. With so much that is expected of us, deep rest can often feel like something that’s always just out of our reach. But what if it’s possible to live in a constant state of resting in God? And even better, what if I told you that God designed you to live this way?

Resting is much more than just sleep; it’s physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual, too.
1. Physical: Self-care, i.e., eating healthy, exercising, getting enough sleep, drinking water, etc.
2. Mental: Getting counseling to maintain good mental health, using discernment on social media
3. Emotional: Spending time with close friends and family
4. Spiritual: Spending quiet time with God, reading the Bible, worship
Remember the acronym R.E.S.T.: “Remain Everyday Steady and Trusting”
1. Remain: “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” (John 15:5)
2. Everyday: “Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful.” (Joshua 1:8)
3. Steady: They [the righteous] will have no fear of bad news; their hearts are steadfast, trusting in the Lord. Their hearts are secure, they will have no fear; in the end they will look in triumph on their foes. (Psalm 112:7-8)
4. Trusting: You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you. (Isaiah 26:3)
Resting requires boundaries. (Luke 10:42) You have to make it a priority over other things.
A warning: If you don’t make time for resting now, you will be forced to rest later.
Rest looks different in different stages of life.
Resting in God is like any other habit; it’s something you develop gradually over time. You must always be intentional about pursuing rest.

Action Step: In which areas of your life have you been lacking rest? If you had to pick one area of your life that could benefit most from rest, what would it be? Set aside time to pray and ask God to show you how to rest in Him.

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Charlie “Tremendous” Jones, a well-known leader in the personal and professional development industry, famously said, “You will be the same person in five years as you are today except for the people you meet and the books you read." Most of the time, you choose who those people are, but sometimes God chooses for you.

How to know that God is changing your social circle:

You start feeling uncomfortable around your current circle.
- This discomfort can take many forms, but often it shows up as a sense that you no longer belong. Things may irritate you that didn’t bother you before, for example.
Conflict increases between you and your circle, often seemingly out of nowhere.
- This is different from the normal conflict that occurs in every relationship. Don’t let an aversion to conflict convince you that a relationship is over.
Your support system begins criticizing you, claiming that “you’ve changed.”
You meet new people who you connect with easily, and who have a positive impact on you.
- This often happens when God wants to increase your responsibility.
You are “reintroduced” to people you already knew, but now you see them in a different light or get to know them on a deeper level.

What to do once you realize God is changing your social circle:

Identify what God is saying through these changes.
- For example, I struggle with confrontation, so God has been pushing me to take an active role in ending certain relationships lately, instead of just passively pulling away.
- Make sure that God is pushing the change and not the enemy.
- Accept that you may not completely understand why God is changing certain things until later, if at all.
Acknowledge how the changes make you feel.
Embrace the changes and believe that God’s plans are best (Jeremiah 29:11).

What not to do:

Fight the change by either holding onto the old or rejecting the new.
Isolate yourself from people in general.
Cut off people when God didn’t tell you to.

Key Point: There’s a difference between following God and acting out of your own bitterness, unforgiveness, or immaturity. If your social circle changes every year, you are the problem.

Action Step: Get out a sheet of paper and divide it into 3 columns. In the first column, list the top 5-10 people in your life right now. In the second column, write a few words that describe the positive traits each of these people brings to your life. In the third column, write the positive things that you contribute to their lives. How do Columns 2 and 3 compare? Do they feel balanced? Are you happy with who is on your list? If not, what are some changes you could make today to improve things?

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We all say we want to live our lives with purpose, bringing glory to God and expanding His kingdom on the earth. And yet, Jesus tells us over and over again throughout Scripture that the life of a Christian isn’t an easy one.

Here are 5 things that pursuing purpose can cost you. Are you ready to pay the price?

Purpose can cost you popularity.
1. Galatians 1:10
Purpose can cost you comfort.
1. Luke 9:23
Purpose can cost you relationships.
1. Matthew 10:34-35
Purpose can cost you resources.
1. Proverbs 3:9-10
Purpose can even cost you your life.
1. Luke 9:24
2. With the exception of John, all of the 12 disciples are believed to have died violent deaths, many as martyrs for the Christian faith.
3. Acts 7 tells the story of Stephen, who is widely considered the first Christian martyr.
4. Estimates vary widely regarding persecuted Christians today, but most faith-based organizations believe that anywhere between 10,000 and 90,000 Christians around the world are martyred for their faith every year. Could you be one of them?
Here are 4 rewards that pursuing purpose can give you:
1. Purpose brings you closer to God.
  1. John 14:21
2. Purpose will give you protection.
  1. Psalm 91
3. Purpose can give you prosperity.
  1. Joshua 1:8
4. Purpose will give you peace.
  1. Psalm 119:165

Action Step: Take some quiet time to meditate on how you may (or may not) be pursuing your God-given purpose. Which areas have you devoted to God? Which areas do you still need to submit to Him? Spend 30 minutes brainstorming, and then ask God to help you fully surrender to His purpose for your life.

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Guiding Scripture: Psalm 27:13-14 - “I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living! Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!” (NLT)

God’s timing is always different from ours.
- Isaiah 55:8-9 - “‘For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,’ declares the Lord. ‘As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.’”
- 2 Peter 3:8 - “But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day.”
The wait is long to build up our faith.
- James 1:2-3 - “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.”
The wait is long to make us mature.
- James 1:4 - “Let perseverance finish its work, so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”
The wait is long so our motives can be revealed.
- Genesis 22:12 - “‘Do not lay a hand on the boy,’ he said. ‘Do not do anything to him. Now I know that you fear God, because you have not withheld from me your son, your only son.’”
The wait is long so that God can get more glory.
- Exodus 3:19-20 - “But I know that the king of Egypt will not let you go unless a mighty hand forces him. So I will raise my hand and strike the Egyptians, performing all kinds of miracles among them. Then at last he will let you go.”
What to do while you’re waiting (the ABC’s of waiting):
- Anticipate what God will do: “Dear brothers and sisters, be patient as you wait for the Lord’s return. Consider the farmers who patiently wait for the rains in the fall and in the spring. They eagerly look for the valuable harvest to ripen. You, too, must be patient. Take courage, for the coming of the Lord is near.” (James 5:7-8)
- Be still: “Be still in the presence of the Lord, and wait patiently for him to act. Don’t worry about evil people who prosper or fret about their wicked schemes.” (Psalm 37:7)
- Celebrate what God is doing right now: “We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation.” (Romans 5:3-4)

Action Step: What is one area where you are waiting on God to break through or bring change in your life?

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Guiding Scripture: Proverbs 29:18 - “Where there is no revelation, people cast off restraint; but blessed is the one who heeds wisdom’s instruction.”

Research shows that while about 60 percent of Americans make New Year’s resolutions every year, only about 8 percent of them actually keep them. Now, I’m no goal setting expert, but I suspect that part of the reason for this discrepancy is because having goals is not the same as having a vision.
Goal (via Merriam-Webster) - something that you are trying to do or achieve
Vision (via Merriam-Webster) - something that you imagine: a picture that you see in your mind
Take time to pray and ask God about His vision for your life.
1. Proverbs 16:3 - “Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans.”
Seek guidance about your vision from mentors and trusted advisors, especially involving major decisions.
1. Proverbs 15:22 - “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.”
Write (or print) your vision plan and review it often.
1. Habakkuk 2:2 - “Then the Lord answered me and said: ‘Write the vision and make it plain on tablets, that he may run who reads it.”
Be flexible and willing to adjust your vision plan when necessary.
1. Proverbs 19:21 - “Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.”
5 categories to include in your vision plan:
1. Your relationship with God.
2. Your relationships with family and friends.
3. Your finances.
4. Your health.
5. Your career.

Action Step: Schedule time before the new year to do “vision casting” with your family (or an accountability partner if you’re single). Write (or type) out the vision and submit it to God in prayer, and be willing to make adjustments as the Lord leads.

References:

"Vacant Vision: See It Before You See It" - Sermon from Michael Todd, Transformation Church

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Guiding Scripture: Nehemiah 4:15 - “When our enemies heard that we were aware of their plot and that God had frustrated it, we all returned to the wall, each to our own work.”

We’ve already talked about the Book of Nehemiah from a broad, overarching perspective. This time, we’re looking at the role that opposition plays in the events of Nehemiah, and how we can respond when opposition happens in our own lives.
The enemy opposes us through ridicule (Nehemiah 4:1-3).
1. Nehemiah responds by:
  - Praying (Nehemiah 4:4-5)
  - Continuing to rebuild (Nehemiah 4:6)
  - Guarding the weakest points of the wall (Nehemiah 4:22-23)
2. When we face ridicule, we should respond by asking God for help, persistence, and by staying vigilant against attack.
The enemy opposes us through distraction (Nehemiah 6:1-2).
1. Nehemiah responds by:
  - Standing firm and staying focused (Nehemiah 6:3-4)
2. When we face distraction, we should respond by remembering our commitment to the work God has called us to do.
The enemy opposes us through intimidation (Nehemiah 6:5-7, 6:17-19).
1. Nehemiah responds by:
  - Praying (Nehemiah 6:9-10, 6:14)
  - Identifying the deception involved (Nehemiah 6:12-13)
  - Again, continuing and completing the work (Nehemiah 6:15)
  - Surrounding himself with people he can trust (Nehemiah 7:2-3)
2. When we face intimidation, we should respond by taking our concerns to God, using discernment and wisdom, and leaning on trustworthy friends for support.
Note: The enemy we see is never the actual enemy we’re fighting. Christians don’t fight against flesh and blood (Ephesians 6:12), and although the battles we fight aren’t easy to overcome, God promises to give us the victory if we trust Him (2 Corinthians 10:4).

Action Step: Identify the areas in your life where you may be experiencing spiritual opposition right now. Which strategy is the enemy using, and how have you been responding to the attacks? Pray and ask God for the right response to use in your situation, and thank Him for giving you the victory in advance!

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Guiding Scripture: Psalm 89:6-7 - “For who in the heavens can be compared to the Lord? Who among the sons of the mighty can be likened to the Lord? God is greatly to be feared in the assembly of the saints, And to be held in reverence by all those around Him.”

As believers, we often talk about God in terms of His function in our lives, or to put it another way, what He can do for us. However, as we mature in our faith, it’s important for us to recognize the nature of who God is outside of our personal preferences. What are some of the most important character traits of God, and how do those character traits help us understand Him better? Let’s talk about it today.
God is holy.
1. Isaiah 6:1-5 - In these verses, the prophet Isaiah describes a vision of God on his throne, and the central theme here is the overwhelming holiness of God.
2. God’s holiness makes Him altogether different from us as created beings. We cannot compare to Him; no one can. When we realize this, our natural reaction should be reverence, worship, and repentance (Isaiah 6:5).
3. The takeaway: Because God is holy and set apart, we won’t always understand what He does or why He does it, and we shouldn’t.
God is sovereign.
1. Jeremiah 32:17 - “Ah, Sovereign LORD, you have made the heavens and the earth by your great power and outstretched arm. Nothing is too hard for you.”
2. God is “all the alls”---all-knowing (omniscient), all-present (omnipresent), and all-powerful (omnipotent).
3. The takeaway: Because God is sovereign, we can trust that He is always in control, no matter how challenging our circumstances are.
God is consistent.
1. Malachi 3:6 - “I the Lord do not change. So you, the descendants of Jacob, are not destroyed.”
2. Hebrews 13:8 - “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever.”
3. Numbers 23:19 - “God is not a man, that He should lie, Nor a son of man, that He should repent. Has He said, and will He not do? Or has He spoken, and will He not make it good?”
4. The takeaway: Because God is consistent, we know that He will never let us down.
God is faithful to His Word.
1. Isaiah 55:11 - “It is the same with my word. I send it out, and it always produces fruit. It will accomplish all I want it to, and it will prosper everywhere I send it.”
2. The takeaway: Because God is faithful to His Word, we can trust in His promises to us. If we obey, He will always bring them to pass.
God is good.
1. Psalm 136:1 - “Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good. His love endures forever.”
2. God’s goodness is about more than just the good things He gives us, or the bad things He protects us from. It’s about His love for us and how He shows that love.
3. God may not always seem good because of the things He allows, but we can trust that He is because His nature is a loving one (1 John 4:16).
4. The takeaway: Because God is good, I know that everything He does in my life, both good and bad, is for my good (Romans 8:28).

Action Step: Which of the 5 attributes of God is most comforting to you right now? Which one is hardest for you to accept? Do a Bible study of the character trait that most challenges your view of God, searching for Scriptures that justify that trait in Him.

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Guiding Scripture: Daniel 6:4 - “At this, the administrators and the satraps tried to find grounds for charges against Daniel in his conduct of government affairs, but they were unable to do so. They could find no corruption in him, because he was trustworthy and neither corrupt nor negligent.”

The book of Daniel might be one of the most mysterious and intriguing books in the entire Bible. It’s full of strange and fantastical imagery and prophecies of the future, but it also tells the story of four brave young Hebrew men who chose over and over again to stand for God, even when it was unpopular---and sometimes deadly---to do so. Those of us who live in the safety and freedom of the Western World will find it difficult to truly understand the danger that Daniel and his friends faced. Still, there are important lessons we can learn from their experiences, and that’s what we’ll be talking about today.
Lesson #1: You can’t eat what the people in Babylon eat.
1. Daniel 1:8 - “But Daniel resolved not to defile himself with the royal food and wine, and he asked the chief official for permission not to defile himself this way.”
Lesson #2: You need the favor of God in order to be effective.
1. When Daniel asked for permission not to eat the king’s food, he received favor from the chief official (Daniel 1:9). This made it possible for Daniel to present the terms of the 10-day test regarding his diet.
Lesson #3: Godly wisdom is critical, especially during moments of crisis.
1. Daniel could have simply thrown a tantrum and refused to eat the king’s food, but instead, he suggested a test (Daniel 1:12-13) that appealed to the Babylonians’ appreciation for logic and education (Daniel 1:4).
2. Later, when Nebuchadnezzar gave an order to have all of his advisers killed, the Bible says that Daniel found Arioch, the commander of the king’s guard, and “spoke to him with wisdom and tact.” (Daniel 2:14)
Lesson #4: Pursue excellence with everything you do in Babylon.
1. Daniel and his friends distinguished themselves from their peers by being exceptional in their work, which led to them receiving even more favor than before (Daniel 1:19-20).
Lesson #5: Taking a stand for God should give Him glory, not you.
1. Daniel not only worshipped God privately for answering his prayers (Daniel 2:19-23), but also credited Him publicly at the first opportunity (Daniel 2:27-28).
2. Not only that, but King Nebuchadnezzar recognized God’s power and sovereignty as well (Daniel 2:47).
3. You may need to engage in some deep self-reflection to determine whether you’re truly hoping to please God with your actions. If your stand for God causes you to feel self-righteous or superior to others, it’s coming from your flesh, rather than the Spirit.

Action Step: Have you ever had to take a stand for God in a way that wasn’t popular with the people around you? If so, what did you do and say in that situation? If not, ask God for the courage to stand in a way that honors Him if the need arises.

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Guiding Scripture: Joshua 1:6 - “Be strong and courageous, because you will lead these people to inherit the land I swore to their ancestors to give them.”

In the book of Joshua, God leads the Israelites into the promised land of Canaan, a land “flowing with milk and honey.” As believers, we all have things that represent our own Promised Land, an area where God has made promises to us that He will fulfill in His timing. For some Christians, the Promised Land means being the first person in their family to earn a college degree. For others, it means getting married or having a child after years of infertility. No matter what your Promised Land may be, one thing is certain: it is never smooth sailing. We frequently talk about the challenge of enduring the storms of the Christian life, but we spend far less time talking about the challenges of stewarding God’s promises once He brings them to pass. That’s what today’s episode is all about.
In your Promised Land, you can expect to receive new instructions from the Lord.
- Joshua 1:2 - “Moses my servant is dead. Now then, you and all these people, get ready to cross the Jordan River into the land I am about to give to them—to the Israelites.”
A new level of consecration.
- Joshua 5:2 - “At that time the Lord said to Joshua, ‘Make flint knives and circumcise the Israelites again.’ So Joshua made flint knives and circumcised the Israelites at Gibeath Haaraloth.”
New levels of spiritual warfare.
- Joshua 10:25 - “Joshua said to them, ‘Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Be strong and courageous. This is what the Lord will do to all the enemies you are going to fight.’”
New temptations (and possibly old ones!).
- Joshua 7:1 - “But the Israelites were unfaithful in regard to the devoted things; Achan son of Karmi, the son of Zimri, the son of Zerah, of the tribe of Judah, took some of them. So the Lord’s anger burned against Israel.”
New victories and blessings from God.
- Joshua 1:3,5 - “I will give you every place where you set your foot, as I promised Moses... No one will be able to stand against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you.”
Note: When you have a strong relationship with the Lord, He will often warn you about many of these things before they happen so you can prepare ahead of time.

Action Step: Based on the factors outlined in this episode, are you seeing God’s promises manifesting in your life right now? If not, ask Him to speak to you about how He is preparing you for them, and what you can do to partner with Him in the process.

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It is my joy, my privilege, and my honor to release a new collaboration with some of my favorite sisters in the Lord: Torrie Slaughter from Our Given Purpose, Casey Alexis from Being Eve, and Stephanie Bright from Christians Girls Pop. In this episode, we're all talking about what it means to "do it anyway."

When God tells you to take a leap of faith and do what He's calling you to do, you may not always feel like it. You may be afraid that the people around you won't understand. You might even feel like you're not strong enough. But at the end of the day, our love for God and our desire to obey Him has to take priority over everything else, our feelings, our preferences, everything. In this episode, we're discussing what that looks like.

Make sure to follow Torrie Slaughter from Our Given Purpose, Casey Alexis from Being Eve, and Stephanie Bright from Christian Girls Pop on social media, and listen to their podcasts on all major podcasting platforms.

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Guiding Scripture: Isaiah 43:19 - “See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.”

In 2020, the world had to deal with the whirlwind that was COVID-19. This year (2021), many of us were hoping to find some sense of normalcy again, but so far that hasn’t been easy, because this year has had plenty of challenges of its own. As a result, many of us have had to go back to the basics as it relates to the different areas of our lives. In this episode, I’m talking about how God made me go “back to the basics” this year, and what that might look like for you.
Key Point: In May of 2020, I released a podcast episode called “The Reset,” (Season 2, Episode 25) which may seem like the same thing as going “back to the basics.” It’s not. Webster’s Dictionary defines a reset as “moving something back to its original place or position.” I’m talking about rebuilding from the foundations and creating something new. In some ways, that’s scarier.
It’s fitting that my family built a house during this time, because it felt like God was reconstructing my life at the same time.
3 Areas Where God Took Me “Back to the Basics”
- My personality. In this season, God has spent a lot of time reaffirming my identity in Him. If I’m not careful, I tend to be an overachiever who finds my identity in doing, instead of being. (Martha vs Mary) God had to do some course correcting with me in that area because I got out of balance. At the same time, he has been showing me some areas where I still have room for growth.
- My business. I’ve been in business as a freelance writer and editor for over a decade, and I’ve made a lot of mistakes over the years simply because I didn’t know any better. Recently I invested in a coaching program to help me build a stronger foundation for my business, and it was worth every penny.
- My relationship with my family. This area is the most personal because it’s still in progress. Without getting into too much detail, I’m learning how to listen more and work on healthier ways to deal with conflict as it relates to my husband and children.
Key Point: Rebuilding can often feel discouraging, because it involves God peeling back layers and showing you things that aren’t working, even though you thought they were.

Action Step: Take at least 30 minutes to spend quiet time with God, and ask Him how He wants to remake and rebuild you during this season. Ask the Holy Spirit to give you the strength to commit to this process, even when it gets uncomfortable.

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In this week's episode, I talk about my favorite personal finance books and how they improved my life. If you need help getting your money right, these books are a great place to start!
Disclaimer: I am not a financial advisor or CPA. The details of this podcast are shared for informational purposes only. Please seek assistance from a certified finance professional who can help you with your unique situation.
Show Notes:

Financial Peace Revisited/The Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey
- Dave Ramsey is one of the most well-known personal finance experts in our generation. I took his Financial Peace University course and read his book, Financial Peace Revisited, when I was in my early 20's.
- I haven't read The Total Money Makeover, but since that's his most popular book and most of the principles overlap with Financial Peace Revisited, I included both here.
- Dave Ramsey is best known for creating the Baby Steps to help people get out of debt and build wealth.
- I don't agree with all of Dave Ramsey's teachings (particularly about eliminating debt), but his materials provide a solid foundation in personal finance overall.
Rich Dad, Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki
- Robert Kiyosaki is another well-known personal finance expert whose teachings are on the opposite end of the spectrum as Dave Ramsey.
- One of the major takeaways for me in this book was the idea that "the poor work for money, while the rich make money work for them".
- Kiyosaki is also known for his argument that "your house is not an asset." Assets, according to him, are things that put money in your pocket, while liabilities take money out. Therefore, the fastest way to build wealth is to buy as many assets as possible.
The Cashflow Quadrant by Robert Kiyosaki
- In this book, Robert Kiyosaki takes a lot of the ideas he explained in Rich Dad, Poor Dad and expands on them. The Cashflow Quadrant is a helpful visual for these new ideas.
- In summary, the "E Quadrant" (which stands for "Employee") and the "S Quadrant" (which stands for "Small Business") are on the left side of the quadrant. It is generally more difficult to build wealth from these quadrants.
- The "B Quadrant" (which stands for "Business Owner") and the "I Quadrant" (which stands for "Investor") are on the right side of the quadrant. Most wealth is built from these quadrants.
The Millionaire Next Door by Thomas J. Stanley
- Here in the U.S., we associate wealthy people with lavish lifestyles, like actors, musicians and athletes. I love the way Thomas Stanley turns this notion on its head.
- Based on detailed research, Stanley describes how the "average" American millionaire looks, thinks and behaves, and the results are often quite surprising.
Family Wealth: Keeping it in the Family by James E. Hughes, Jr.
- Hughes describes how families keep their wealth from one generation to the next.
- He also explains the details of trusts, intergenerational family meetings and limiting taxes.
Action Step: Read or listen to the audio version of one of the books on this list.

Family Wealth--Keeping It in the Family: How Family Members and Their Advisers Preserve Human, Intellectual, and Financial Assets for Generations

The Millionaire Next Door: The Surprising Secrets of America's Wealthy

Rich Dad Poor Dad (What the Rich Teach Their Kids About Money - That the Poor and Middle Class Do Not!)

Rich Dad's Cashflow Quadrant: Rich Dad's Guide to Financial Freedom

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Guiding Scripture: 1 Peter 3:15 - “But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect...”

Can I be real for a minute? As Christians, we can get so enamored with the idea of being Christians that we forget to step back and consider why we believe what we believe. If a nonbeliever came up to us and asked us why we made the decision to accept Christ as Savior, what would we say? Would we even have an answer? Recently, the Lord challenged me to consider this question for myself, and these are the answers that came to mind.
I believe in Jesus because there is compelling evidence to suggest that He lived.
- There isn’t much physical evidence of Christ’s existence, but archaeologists have discovered remnants that point to both Nazareth (Jesus’ hometown) and the type of Roman crucifixion that Jesus suffered in the New Testament.
- Jesus was mentioned in documents written by both Jewish and Roman historians in the decades after His death, and these writings corroborate certain details in the New Testament, such as the mention of Pontius Pilate.
- Many of these texts were written by people who did not identify themselves as Christians and had no reason to lie.
I believe in Jesus because the Bible makes sense to me.
- The Bible answers all of my major questions about life and humanity. It addresses everything from why there is evil in the world to where we go after we die.
- The Bible is the only book I’ve ever read that affects me differently no matter how many times I read it. I’ve read other sacred texts before, and they’ve never given me that experience.
- “For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword” (Hebrews 4:12)
I believe in Jesus because He gives my life hope and purpose.
- Paul said that if our hope in Christ is only for this world, we should be pitied more than anyone else (1 Corinthians 15:19).
- My cousin Dana passed away at 20, and my belief in Jesus gives me hope that I’ll see her again.
I believe in Jesus because He stands apart from other religious figures.
- When you look at most of the major world religions, they are very similar in the principles they teach. The one area where they differ is in what they believe about Jesus.
- Jesus is the only religious figure that identifies Himself as the one way to God (John 14:6).
I believe in Jesus because I’ve encountered Him for myself.
- Although I grew up in a Christian household, I didn’t really experience the power of Jesus for myself until He freed me from depression.
- People can discredit the idea of Jesus as Messiah all they want, but they can never take away your personal testimony.

Action Step: Why did you decide to become a Christian? Do you relate to any of the reasons I gave for my belief? Sit down with a Christian friend and engage in a mock debate about the merits of Christianity.

References:

https://www.history.com/news/was-jesus-real-historical-evidence

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Guiding Scripture: Psalm 81:9 - “You shall have no foreign god among you; you shall not worship any god other than me.” (NIV)

Remember, worship is about our heart posture. Whatever has our heart has our worship, so if something has taken the place in your heart where God should be, it’s an idol.
In other words, idolatry is anything that you love---and are more committed to---than God.
Anything can be an idol. Here are some of the most common ones:
Idols can be people.
- Daniel 6:7,9 - “The royal administrators, prefects, satraps, advisers and governors have all agreed that the king should issue an edict and enforce the decree that anyone who prays to any god or human being during the next thirty days, except to you, Your Majesty, shall be thrown into the lions’ den... So King Darius put the decree in writing.”
- These days, celebrity culture has become one of the most popular forms of idol worship. Social media has given us intimate knowledge of other peoples’ lives, causing us to worship both them and the platforms that give us access to them.
Idols can be possessions.
- Exodus 32:3-4 - “So all the people took off their earrings and brought them to Aaron. 4 He took what they handed him and made it into an idol cast in the shape of a calf, fashioning it with a tool. Then they said, “These are your gods, Israel, who brought you up out of Egypt.”
- In modern times, we worship everything from food to houses to cars, but the most entrenched and widespread idolatry is probably connected to our smartphones.
Idols can be politics (ideas).
- Acts 17:19-21 - “(All the Athenians and the foreigners who lived there spent their time doing nothing but talking about and listening to the latest ideas.)”
- These days, many people have turned their preferred political party into an idol. No man made party is capable of representing the perfect and righteous kingdom of God. It’s okay to have preferences, but we must always be willing to lay those preferences at the foot of the cross.
One thing that makes idolatry difficult to overcome is the fact that it’s layered. When we turn away from God, we rarely replace Him with one thing. Instead, we worship multiple gods in an effort to fill the emptiness we feel without Him.
What to do with the idols in your life:
- Identify them with the help of the Holy Spirit. “But when the Father sends the Advocate as my representative—that is, the Holy Spirit—he will teach you everything and will remind you of everything I have told you.” (John 14:26, NLT)
- Tear them down. “Asa did what was good and right in the eyes of the Lord his God. He removed the foreign altars and the high places, smashed the sacred stones and cut down the Asherah poles.” (2 Chronicles 14:2-3, NIV)
- Renew your commitment to God through worship. “At that time they sacrificed to the Lord seven hundred head of cattle and seven thousand sheep and goats from the plunder they had brought back. They entered into a covenant to seek the Lord, the God of their ancestors, with all their heart and soul.” (2 Chronicles 15:11-12)

Action Step: Are there any idols in your life that you may have unknowingly erected that you need to tear down? If so, what are they? Begin walking through the steps to tear down the idols in your heart today.

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Guiding Scripture: Psalm 95:6 - “Come, let us bow down in worship, let us kneel before the Lord our Maker;” (NIV)

Okay, we know what worship is, but now the question is, why is it important? Why should we make it a priority in our lives? Are there levels of worship, and if so, how do we go deeper in our worship experience with God?
Worship is what we were created to do.
- 1 Peter 2:9 - “But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.”
Worship is spiritual warfare.
- 2 Chronicles 20:22 - “As they began to sing and praise, the Lord set ambushes against the men of Ammon and Moab and Mount Seir who were invading Judah, and they were defeated.”
Worship is key to unlocking the promises of God.
- Exodus 23:25-26 - “Worship the Lord your God, and his blessing will be on your food and water. I will take away sickness from among you, and none will miscarry or be barren in your land. I will give you a full life span.”
Most importantly, worship takes glory off of us and gives it to God.
- Psalm 29:2 - “Ascribe to the Lord the glory due his name; worship the Lord in the splendor of his holiness.”
- Psalm 86:9 - “All the nations you have made will come and worship before you, Lord; they will bring glory to your name.”
Practical ways to deepen your worship life:
- Find a new worship song to listen to during your quiet time with God.
- Listen to an old worship song that you haven’t heard in a long time.
- Read a psalm and meditate on the words while worship music plays.
- Take a cue from David and write a psalm while worship music plays.
- Draw or paint a picture of what you see while worship music plays.
- If weather permits, spend your worship time outside, preferably in nature.

Action Step: Choose one of the suggestions listed in this episode and incorporate it into your worship time for a week. Did you feel closer to God as a result of this change?

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Guiding Scripture: John 4:23-24 - “Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in the Spirit and in truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks. God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in the Spirit and in truth.” (NIV)

Worship is a topic that is demonstrated every week in the Church, but rarely discussed in detail. It is one of the most important concepts that we should understand in our faith, yet so much of what we believe about worship is limited to cultural preferences. What does the Bible actually say about worship, and how can we apply this to our daily lives?
Worship is acknowledging God for who He is.
- It is often used interchangeably with praise, which is acknowledging God for what He has done.
- Worship is not limited by culture; God created us differently so we could have different expressions of worship. All of these expressions are beautiful to Him.
- Worship has less to do with the style of music and more to do with the posture of our hearts.
Worship lowers us and lifts God.
- Psalm 95:6 - “Come, let us bow down in worship, let us kneel before the Lord our Maker;” (NIV)
- Whenever people worshipped God in the Bible, they would physically bow themselves down and lift their hands up to God.
- This is why worship often feels uncomfortable, especially for new believers. It is meant to remind us that only God is worthy of worship, and we are not.
Worship requires genuine sacrifice.
- In the Old Testament, people worshipped using offerings, so the quality of those offerings was very important to God.
- These sacrifices were not only a form of worship, but they also served as an atonement for sin.
- The story of Cain and Abel - Genesis 4:3-5
- After Jesus died for our sins and became the ultimate sacrifice, the focus of worship shifted away from animal sacrifices to us. We have become houses of worship to God, and our physical bodies have become the evidence of that.
- Romans 12:1 - “Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship.”
If we don’t worship God, we will always worship something else.
- Exodus 23:33 - “Do not let them live in your land or they will cause you to sin against me, because the worship of their gods will certainly be a snare to you.”

Action Step: Based on the definition of worship given in this episode, when was the last time you worshipped God? What do you think it means to become a “living sacrifice” to God today?

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God’s timing is always different from ours.
- Isaiah 55:8-9 - “‘For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,’ declares the Lord. ‘As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.’”
- 2 Peter 3:8 - “But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day.”
The wait is long to build up our faith.
- James 1:2-3 - “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.”
The wait is long to make us mature.
- James 1:4 - “Let perseverance finish its work, so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”
The wait is long so our motives can be revealed.
- Genesis 22:12 - “‘Do not lay a hand on the boy,’ he said. ‘Do not do anything to him. Now I know that you fear God, because you have not withheld from me your son, your only son.’”
The wait is long so that God can get more glory.
- Exodus 3:19-20 - “But I know that the king of Egypt will not let you go unless a mighty hand forces him. So I will raise my hand and strike the Egyptians, performing all kinds of miracles among them. Then at last he will let you go.”
What to do while you’re waiting (the ABC’s of waiting):
- Anticipate what God will do: “Dear brothers and sisters, be patient as you wait for the Lord’s return. Consider the farmers who patiently wait for the rains in the fall and in the spring. They eagerly look for the valuable harvest to ripen. You, too, must be patient. Take courage, for the coming of the Lord is near.” (James 5:7-8)
- Be still: “Be still in the presence of the Lord, and wait patiently for him to act. Don’t worry about evil people who prosper or fret about their wicked schemes.” (Psalm 37:7)
- Celebrate what God is doing right now: “We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation.” (Romans 5:3-4)

Action Step: What is one area where you are waiting on God to break through or bring change in your life?

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Guiding Scripture: Numbers 14:23 - “They will never even see the land I swore to give their ancestors. None of those who have treated me with contempt will ever see it.” (NLT)

We all love to focus on and talk about the excitement of walking in the promises of God---having our prayers answered, our lives changed, and our dreams fulfilled in Him. Many people in the Bible experienced these kinds of extraordinary blessings, which is why we know their stories today. But what about the people who missed the mark? Where did they go wrong? And more importantly, how can we avoid making their mistakes?
Reason #1: Unforgiveness (Joseph)
- Psalm 105:17 - “Until the time came to fulfill his dreams, the Lord tested Joseph’s character.”
- Genesis 45:5 - “But don’t be upset, and don’t be angry with yourselves for selling me to this place. It was God who sent me here ahead of you to preserve your lives.”
Reason #2: Doubt/Lack of Faith (Zechariah)
- Luke 1:20 - “But now, since you didn’t believe what I said, you will be silent and unable to speak until the child is born. For my words will certainly be fulfilled at the proper time.”
Reason #3: Dishonor/Rebellion (Moses)
- Numbers 20:12 - “But the Lord said to Moses and Aaron, “Because you did not trust in me enough to honor me as holy in the sight of the Israelites, you will not bring this community into the land I give them.”
Reason #4: Impatience (Abraham)
- Genesis 16:3 - “So after Abram had been living in Canaan ten years, Sarai his wife took her Egyptian slave Hagar and gave her to her husband to be his wife.” (NIV)
Reason #5: Disobedience (Saul)
- 1 Samuel 13:13-14 - “How foolish!” Samuel exclaimed. “You have not kept the command the Lord your God gave you. Had you kept it, the Lord would have established your kingdom over Israel forever. But now your kingdom must end, for the Lord has sought out a man after his own heart. The Lord has already appointed him to be the leader of his people, because you have not kept the Lord’s command.”
The good news is that when we repent after missing God’s promise, He is faithful to forgive us and cleanse us from unrighteousness (1 John 1:9)
David did this after he slept with Bathsheba and had her husband Uriah killed (Psalm 51). Although he still experienced consequences for his sin, he kept his throne and God mercifully kept His promise.
Saul, in contrast, never repented to the Lord directly. He asked Samuel to forgive his sin first (1 Samuel 15:24-25), and then wanted Samuel to worship with him so he could save face in front of the elders and all of Israel (1 Samuel 30-31).

Action Step: Study the lives of Saul and David this week. Compare their moments of sin and how each of them responded when confronted (1 Samuel 15 for Saul, 2 Samuel 12 and Psalm 51 for David). What differences do you notice in their behavior, and what does this say about their ability to see God’s promise---or not?

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Guiding Scripture: 2 Corinthians 3:18 - “So all of us who have had that veil removed can see and reflect the glory of the Lord. And the Lord—who is the Spirit—makes us more and more like him as we are changed into his glorious image.” (NLT)

As Christians, we know that God is calling us to become more and more like Him over time, but what does it look like to move from one level to the next? How do we know when we’ve achieved a new level of holiness and maturity in God, and how should we respond?
Your prayer life changes.
- You spend more time recognizing where your weaknesses end and God’s strength begins (2 Corinthians 12:9-10).
- You spend less time praising God, and more time worshipping Him. Praise is acknowledging God for what He has done, while worship is acknowledging Him for who He is.
- You spend less time talking to God, and more time hearing from Him.
Your thinking changes.
- Romans 12:2 - “Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.”
Your speech changes.
- Psalm 141:3 - “O LORD, set a guard at my mouth. Keep watch over the door of my lips.
- 1 Corinthians 13:11 - “When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up, I put away childish things.”
Your behavior changes.
- You are more stable and not easily swayed in your emotions by false teaching (Ephesians 4:14).
- You have studied the word of God to the point where you can teach or explain it to others (Hebrews 5:12).
- You don’t just listen to God’s word, but you also do what it says (James 1:22).
Your relationships change.
- Proverbs 12:26 - “The righteous choose their friends carefully, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.”
Listen to Season 2, Episode 41 of Purpose Without Apology (“When God Changes Your Social Circle”) for an in-depth discussion about how to respond to this type of “leveling up.”

Action Step: Answer the following questions during your quiet time with God: What is one way that God is encouraging me to “level up” in this season? Have I been embracing this change or resisting it? How can I respond to God’s maturing process in a better way?

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Guiding Scripture: Ecclesiastes 3:1, 7 - “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens... a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak…”

One of the most powerful lessons we can learn as believers is recognize when to speak and when to be silent. Christians can either make or break our witness based on what we say, how we say it, and when we say it. Many times, we do great damage because we talk too much and don’t listen enough.
Being silent at the right time is a sign of wisdom.
- Proverbs 17:28 - “Even fools are thought wise when they keep silent; with their mouths shut, they seem intelligent.”
Silence can keep you out of trouble.
- Proverbs 21:23 - “Whoever guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble.”
- Proverbs 10:19 - “Transgression is at work where people talk too much, but anyone who holds his tongue is prudent.”
Silence can help us receive advice or instruction.
- Psalm 62:5-6 - “My soul, wait in silence for God only, For my hope is from Him. He only is my rock and my salvation, My stronghold; I shall not be shaken.”
- Psalm 37:7 - “Be silent in the LORD’s presence and wait patiently for him. Don’t be angry because of the one whose way prospers or the one who implements evil schemes.”
Sometimes silence is necessary before something significant happens.
- God was silent for 400 years before the birth of Christ.
- Zechariah lost his ability to speak before the birth of his son John due to his lack of faith (Luke 1:20)
- Even Jesus only spoke what God told Him to say and how He told Him to say it (John 12:49).
At the same time, we can’t keep silent when God has specifically called us to speak out.
- Galatians 6:1 - “Brothers, even if a person is caught in some transgression, you who are spiritual should correct that one in a gentle spirit, looking to yourself, so that you also may not be tempted.”
- Proverbs 31:9 - “Speak up, judge righteously, and defend the rights of the afflicted and oppressed.”
Ultimately, we need God’s help to know when to speak and what to say.
- Psalm 141:3 - “O LORD, set a guard at my mouth. Keep watch over the door of my lips.
- Moses was afraid to go before Pharaoh because of his stutter, but God promised to give him what to say (Exodus 4).

Action Step: Read the scriptures outlined in this episode and ask yourself the following questions: 1) In what ways does God want me to be silent when I want to speak; and 2) in what ways does He want me to speak when I want to be silent?

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How to know that God is changing your social circle:

You start feeling uncomfortable around your current circle.
- This discomfort can take many forms, but often it shows up as a sense that you no longer belong. Things may irritate you that didn’t bother you before, for example.
Conflict increases between you and your circle, often seemingly out of nowhere.
- This is different from the normal conflict that occurs in every relationship. Don’t let an aversion to conflict convince you that a relationship is over.
Your support system begins criticizing you, claiming that “you’ve changed.”
You meet new people who you connect with easily, and who have a positive impact on you.
- This often happens when God wants to increase your responsibility.
You are “reintroduced” to people you already knew, but now you see them in a different light or get to know them on a deeper level.

What to do once you realize God is changing your social circle:

Identify what God is saying through these changes.
- For example, I struggle with confrontation, so God has been pushing me to take an active role in ending certain relationships lately, instead of just passively pulling away.
- Make sure that God is pushing the change and not the enemy.
- Accept that you may not completely understand why God is changing certain things until later, if at all.
Acknowledge how the changes make you feel.
Embrace the changes and believe that God’s plans are best (Jeremiah 29:11).

What not to do:

Fight the change by either holding onto the old or rejecting the new.
Isolate yourself from people in general.
Cut off people when God didn’t tell you to.

Key Point: There’s a difference between following God and acting out of your own bitterness, unforgiveness, or immaturity. If your social circle changes every year, you are the problem.

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Guiding Scripture: “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who[a] have been called according to his purpose.” (Romans 8:28)

Everyone fails. No matter who you are or how much you’ve accomplished in life, you will eventually face an obstacle that is too much for you. How do we as believers respond when that happens? Is failure really the negative thing we believe it is, or is it really one of God’s greatest ways of teaching us?

Lesson #1: Failure is often relative.
- What seems like a failure to you can be a dream come true for someone else.
- For example, you may consider it a curse to become an unwed mother, but a woman who is struggling with infertility would consider that same situation a blessing.
Lesson #2: Failure is what you do, not who you are.
- “No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:37-39)
Lesson #3: Failure keeps us humble and dependent on God.
- “‘Master,’ Simon replied, ‘we worked hard all last night and didn’t catch a thing. But if you say so, I’ll let the nets down again.’ And this time their nets were so full of fish they began to tear!” (Luke 5:5-6)
Lesson #4: Failure teaches us resilience.
- “The godly may trip seven times, but they will get up again. But one disaster is enough to overthrow the wicked.” (Proverbs 24:16)
Lesson #5: Failure allows us to experience God’s grace.
- “But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.” (2 Corinthians 12:9)

Action Step: Are there areas in your life where you feel like a failure? If so, why? How is God calling you to rethink those failures and submit them to Him? Pray this week and ask God to show you how to look at those areas differently.

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As women, we usually do a lot of juggling in our households. Many of us have to manage working, cooking, cleaning, and taking care of children and other family members. With so much that is expected of us, deep rest can often feel like something that’s always just out of our reach. But what if it’s possible to live in a constant state of resting in God? And even better, what if I told you that God designed you to live this way?

Resting is much more than just sleep; it’s physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual, too.
1. Physical: Self-care, i.e., eating healthy, exercising, getting enough sleep, drinking water, etc.
2. Mental: Getting counseling to maintain good mental health, using discernment on social media
3. Emotional: Spending time with close friends and family
4. Spiritual: Spending quiet time with God, reading the Bible, worship
Remember the acronym R.E.S.T.: “Remain Everyday Steady and Trusting”
1. Remain: “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” (John 15:5)
2. Everyday: “Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful.” (Joshua 1:8)
3. Steady: They [the righteous] will have no fear of bad news; their hearts are steadfast, trusting in the Lord. Their hearts are secure, they will have no fear; in the end they will look in triumph on their foes. (Psalm 112:7-8)
4. Trusting: You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you. (Isaiah 26:3)
Resting requires boundaries. (Luke 10:42) You have to make it a priority over other things.
A warning: If you don’t make time for resting now, you will be forced to rest later.
Rest looks different in different stages of life.
Resting in God is like any other habit; it’s something you develop gradually over time. You must always be intentional about pursuing rest.

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Guiding Scripture: "I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." (John 16:33)

As believers, we know that uncertainty is part of life. At the time of this recording, the world is grappling with the spread of the coronavirus, but you can replace that crisis with any other (i.e., election cycles, a job loss, a bear market/other economic problems, etc.). The principles in this episode will still apply.

Jesus told us this would happen, but He also promised to give us everything we need to endure and thrive. Here are some suggestions:

Trust God and seek Him in prayer (Philippians 4:6).
Step away from social media and the news.
- Studies show that higher amounts of screen time are related to higher levels of anxiety and depression.
- Try limiting your screen time to certain times of the day, or a certain length of time each day. Avoid checking your phone first thing in the morning or right before bed.
Meditate on promises in God’s word that apply to your specific situation. A few I’ve been meditating on lately:
- 2 Chronicles 7:14
- Psalm 91
- Isaiah 54:17
Seek advice from knowledgeable experts.
- For example, if you’re facing a potential job loss, you might take a class on money management or improving your LinkedIn profile.
Take action to prepare for the future.
Know the difference between fear, faith and wisdom.
- Fear is not from God (2 Timothy 1:7) and causes us to fixate on our problems, rather than on the God who can solve them.
- Faith is belief in God and His sovereignty, especially concerning things we can’t control (2 Corinthians 5:7) .
- Wisdom is taking action concerning the things we can control (James 1:5).
Pray and intercede for others, especially in the body of Christ. This is especially powerful to do with other believers.

Action Step: Think about how you’ve been responding to the areas of uncertainty in your life. Be honest. Do your actions align with the strategies you’ve heard in this episode? If not, what changes can you make today to improve your behavior?

Resources:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/digital-world-real-world/202002/anxiety-and-social-media-use

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If you ask most people what their "calling" in life is, you're likely to get either their job title or a blank stare. But what if your calling isn't meant to be a mystery? What if it's closer than you think? In this episode, we'll discuss the 5 questions that can help you discover your God-given calling, so that you can walk into your destiny with confidence.

What am I better at than most people?
- It’s not enough for you to do something well. Something you’re good at is a gift, but something you’re exceptional at is more likely to be your calling.
- For example, I think I'm a good cook, but I'm not good enough to become a chef. I am, however, better than most people at writing.
- Thinking about your gifts in general terms will keep you confused. You need to drill down and focus if you want clarity.
What do I love to do?
- There is a lot of debate online about whether you should pursue "passion or profit." I think that misses the point. Your passion is an important part of who you are, and it needs to be acknowledged, even if you don't make a living pursuing it.
- Your passions can change over time. Some passions are only for a season, and that’s okay.
- It’s also fine to have more than one passion.
What makes you angry and keeps you up at night?
- For example, I have a friend who loves animals and hates when they're abused, which led to her taking a job as a veterinarian assistant.
What problems are you uniquely equipped to solve?
- As queen of Persia, Esther was able to use her royal position and her connection to the Jewish people to save them from destruction.
- As a wealthy German businessman, Oskar Schindler was able to save over 1,200 Jewish people from being sent to concentration camps during World War II.
- Look at your upbringing, culture, personality and personal history to help you identify what problems you can solve that few others can.
Who are your people?
- I like to call this your “belong group.” In other words, these are the people who speak your language and respond to your ideas with enthusiasm and support.
- In business, this is your audience. In church, it may be your area of ministry.
- No one is called to everyone. Even Jesus was limited in his area of ministry (See Matthew 15:24).

Use these questions to help you decide whether a job, project or volunteer opportunity is the right fit for you. Each individual task you complete won’t check all of these boxes, but the combination of your life experiences (work, family, community, etc.) should.

Action Step:Take 30 minutes to answer the 5 questions outlined in this episode. Did any of your answers surprise you? If so, how?

References:

Episode 2: "Purpose, Calling, Assignment: What's the Difference?"

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Guiding Scripture: Many are the plans in a person's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails. (Proverbs 19:21)

At some point in your life, God will ruin your plans. Here’s why:

He has His own plans for us (Jeremiah 29:11).
His plans are better than ours (Isaiah 55:8-9).
He wants us to trust Him even when we don’t understand (Proverbs 3:5-6).

When God ruins your plans, you have two choices: You can either fight God and hang onto your plan, or let go and embrace His.

How God ruined my plans:

I planned to become an attorney, but God led me to change my career track during my senior year of college.
I planned to pursue a career before starting a family, but God sent my husband to me in high school, which led to me getting married and having children at a young age.
I planned to be comfortable financially, but God allowed my husband and me to struggle with money for many years.
One of my biggest struggles has been that I planned to work in a traditional 9-to-5 job, but God called me to become a stay-at-home/work-at-home mom.

Key Point: Your ruined plans will often be someone else’s dream life. That doesn’t make them any less ruined for you.

3 things to do when God ruins your plans:

Feel your feelings and take them to God. You’re human, and it’s okay to be disappointed.
Next, ask God why He ruined your plans and what He wants you to learn from it.
Be obedient and make a new plan with God’s help.

Once you've decided to lay down your plans and accept God's, it's important for you to find accountability partners to keep you on track. You will be tempted to go back to your old plans because they’re comfortable and familiar.

Action Step: Get honest with God in prayer about the ways you feel He’s ruined your life. Begin doing the hard work to wrestle with your issues, whatever they are. This will take time. It doesn’t happen overnight.

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A lot of women, especially mothers, struggle with the feeling that we're never quite good enough. In this episode, you'll learn that no matter how many mistakes you make, God always gives “grace for the gaps.”

What is grace?

In many church traditions, grace is defined as “getting the good things that you don’t deserve,” while mercy is “not getting the bad things that you do deserve.”
My favorite definition comes from a former pastor of mine. He defined grace as “God doing for us what we can’t do for ourselves.”
Reference Scriptures:
2 Corinthians 12:8-9
Ephesians 2:8-9
Romans 5:15

What is “the gap”?

“The gap” is the place where your best efforts fail. You can only get so far in your own strength before you either burn out or give up or both.
This could be anything from losing patience with your toddler to juggling the needs of a blended family to struggling with chronic illness.
The gap is where you realize your need for God. It doesn’t have to be rock bottom, but it often is.

Fortunately, God makes His grace available to us in a variety of ways (Hebrews 4:16):

It helps us to endure things that are uniquely hard (2 Corinthians 12:8-9).
It empowers us to serve and do other good things we normally couldn’t (1 Peter 4:10).
It literally makes salvation possible (Ephesians 2:8-9).

What does this mean?

We don’t have to be afraid of experiencing hardship, because God promises that He will sustain us.
We also don’t have to be afraid to take a “leap of faith” and try something new, because God will equip us.
He did all the work to help us “get” saved and “keep” our salvation.

What inspired this episode:

Recently, my son was sick with pneumonia, and of course, I put a lot of things on the back burner so I could take care of him. One of those things was this podcast. I fell behind and didn't release an episode last week.
At first, I felt guilty about failing to keep my commitment, but then I realized the importance of giving myself grace and receiving grace from a God who loves me. As women, we don't have to be perfect; God gives us the grace to be human, and we should do the same for ourselves.

Action Step: What are some areas of your life where you need an extra measure of grace right now? List them and pray about them in detail over the next 7 days.

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Many people here in the U.S. are facing a lot of major decisions right now. Parents are trying to decide whether or not to send their children back to school. Teachers are trying to decide whether to return to their jobs in the fall. And our entire country faces one of the most contentious political elections of our generation in November. How do we as Christians make wise choices in the midst of chaos?
Here are 5 things I do whenever I need to make a major decision:

I get alone, get quiet and ask God for wisdom.
1. James 1:5 - “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.”
2. Isaiah 30:21 - “Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, “This is the way; walk in it.””
I look for answers in the word of God.
1. Psalm 119:105 - “Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.”
I seek advice from sources/people I trust.
1. Make sure your inner circle includes people who are mature, discreet and willing to disagree with you.
2. Proverbs 27:6 - “Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.”
I trust my God-given discernment.
1. The Bible says that wisdom and knowledge are two of the gifts of the spirit (1 Corinthians 12).
2. For example, recently I was presented with two investment opportunities that looked good on paper, but something about them just didn’t feel right.
I let God’s peace lead me.
1. Philippians 4:6-7 - “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
2. 2 Timothy 1:7 - “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.” (KJV)
3. This is arguably the most important step in making major decisions. If you have gone through all the other steps to get here and still don’t have peace, that is almost always a red flag.
4. Either your lack of peace is being caused by your own fear (which needs to be cast out), or it’s a warning from God about your decision.

Action Step: Are you facing a major decision in your life right now? If so, take some quiet time to follow the steps listed in this episode. Make sure to write down what you discover during each step, whether it’s a prayer or a conversation with someone you trust.

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Here are 5 things that pursuing purpose can cost you. Are you ready to pay the price?

Purpose can cost you popularity.
1. Galatians 1:10
Purpose can cost you comfort.
1. Luke 9:23
Purpose can cost you relationships.
1. Matthew 10:34-35
Purpose can cost you resources.
1. Proverbs 3:9-10
Purpose can even cost you your life.
1. Luke 9:24
2. With the exception of John, all of the 12 disciples are believed to have died violent deaths, many as martyrs for the Christian faith.
3. Acts 7 tells the story of Stephen, who is widely considered the first Christian martyr.
4. Estimates vary widely regarding persecuted Christians today, but most faith-based organizations believe that anywhere between 10,000 and 90,000 Christians around the world are martyred for their faith every year. Could you be one of them?
Here are 4 rewards that pursuing purpose can give you:
1. Purpose brings you closer to God.
  1. John 14:21
2. Purpose will give you protection.
  1. Psalm 91
3. Purpose can give you prosperity.
  1. Joshua 1:8
4. Purpose will give you peace.
  1. Psalm 119:165

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I am thrilled and honored to present this special bonus episode of Purpose Without Apology! This is a powerful collaboration with three of my sisters in Christ: Casey Alexis, Stephanie Bright and Torrie Slaughter. You'll hear each of us declare God's truths about racism, injustice and unconditional love through spoken word. I'm so excited for you to hear our unique styles and creativity. You're going to love it!

Be sure to follow and support:

Casey Alexis of Being Eve
Stephanie Bright of Christian Girls P.O.P.
Torrie Slaughter of Our Given Purpose

Their podcasts are available on all major podcasting platforms. Thanks for tuning in!

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Police brutality has been a heartbreaking issue for African-Americans for decades, but the recent murder of George Floyd triggered a historic response. Protests erupted overnight, both in the U.S. and around the world. Unfortunately, violence in the form of riots and looting has also emerged. How do we as Christians navigate the issue of racial justice within the context of our faith?
Biblically, we have multiple options:
1. We can pray. (2 Chronicles 7:14)
2. We can fast. (Isaiah 58:6)
3. We can listen more and speak less. (James 1:19)
  1. When people of color share how they have been harmed by racism, believe them.
4. We can speak out… (Isaiah 1:17)
  1. By voting.
  2. By advocating for others in our schools, workplaces and general everyday life.
5. We can donate to organizations that help the oppressed, especially ones that are Christian-based. (Proverbs 28:27)
6. We can educate ourselves about the causes of racial injustice. (Proverbs 18:2)
7. We can teach our children how to help the oppressed. (Proverbs 22:6)
For Christ followers, pursuing racial justice isn’t just a good idea; it’s a reflection of the heart of God. When we fight for the oppressed, we honor Him. (Micah 6:8)
Key Point: It’s important not to tackle all of these strategies at once. The fight for racial justice is a marathon, not a sprint. During times like these, it can feel like you should do everything, but that will only wear you out. Keep it simple; pick one or two ideas and start there.

Action Step: Ask God which of the strategies in this episode you and your family should focus on in the coming days. How is He calling you to help?

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When it comes to entrepreneurship, a lot of people are quick to say, “That isn’t for everyone.” In this episode, I want to make the case for entrepreneurship being a viable and desirable option that women of all backgrounds should a least consider.

Entrepreneurship is on the rise, especially for women. A few facts:

According to a study from American Express, the number of women-owned businesses increased by 114 percent between 1997 and 2017, a rate 2.5 times higher than the national average. In 2018, 11.6 million U.S. businesses were women-owned and generated more than $1.7 trillion in revenue.
Women with established businesses rate their well-being almost three times higher than women who aren’t entrepreneurs, and 1.6 times higher than their male counterparts. 68 percent of women owners run their businesses from home, and 78 percent of female entrepreneurs believe they’ve achieved work-life balance.
71 percent of new women-owned businesses launched each day are owned by women of color, with Black women as the fastest-growing group of entrepreneurs.

Entrepreneurship is an especially appealing option for women due to:

Flexibility
More opportunities for growth
More control over income
The ability to pursue personal interests and passions

Many times, especially for marginalized groups, entrepreneurship is a necessity due to a lack of traditional workplace opportunities. This was my experience.

There’s a difference between being an entrepreneur and an employer:

An entrepreneur is anyone who goes into business for themselves. This often includes businesses with only one employee (the business creator). People who “own their jobs” in this way are known as solopreneurs.
An employer is a person or company that provides a job paying wages or a salary to one or more people
It’s possible to be an entrepreneur without being an employer. In fact, most entrepreneurs are. According to the Small Business Administration, over 70 percent of businesses in the United States are owned and operated by sole proprietors.

You don't have to quit your job! You can always start and run a part-time business, either on its own or in addition to your current job. Expand your thinking about entrepreneurship.

Even if you don’t want to own a business, you should at least have multiple streams of income. Here are a few suggestions:

Investments: If you don’t want to own a business, owning stock in someone else’s business is the next best thing.
Real estate: Buying and holding property will provide you with cash flow, which ensures you can pay your bills even if you lose your 9 to 5.

Action Step: Go back to the information you wrote down about your calling and assignment from episodes #2 and #5. Use that information to brainstorm ideas for a potential side hustle.

Resources:

Episode 2: “Purpose, Calling, Assignment: What’s the Difference?”
Episode 5: “5 Questions to Help You Discover Your Calling”
"25 Intriguing Facts About the State of Female Entrepreneurship" from Startup Nation

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The rise of COVID-19 has forced our entire world to change forever. Even as we are making steps to “get back to normal,” the truth is that we will need to create a new normal. Have you embraced this reset?

5 Areas I’ve Had to Reset Recently
1. My relationship with God.
2. My relationship with my family.
3. My health.
4. My podcast.
5. My identity.
5 Areas That May Need a Reset in Your Life
1. Your relationship with God: Has your prayer life gotten stronger? Have you been studying the Bible more? Have you been connecting with God on a deeper level in general?
2. Your identity: How do you see yourself? Are you an overachiever? Do you struggle with laziness? Do you suffer from analysis paralysis?
3. Your relationship with your loved ones: Are you spending more quality time with family and friends (either in your home or from a distance)?
4. Your health: Are you cooking more and getting more exercise?
5. Your finances: Are you saving and preparing for the future, especially times of economic uncertainty?
Key Point: Don’t let anyone tell you how you should spend your time during a reset. Everyone is different, and we need the Holy Spirit to direct our steps, especially during seasons of resetting.
Action Step: Take at least 30 minutes to spend quiet time with God, and ask Him what lessons He wants you to take from this reset season.

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Disclaimer: I am not a financial adviser or CPA. The details of this podcast are shared for informational purposes only. Please seek assistance from a certified finance professional who can help you with your unique situation.Budgeting is like eating right and exercising---things everyone knows they should do, but few do them effectively. Although 67% of Americans claim to have a budget, 74% of American workers are living paycheck to paycheck (and 1 in 4 of households making over $150,000 a year).

Step 1: Develop a positive mindset about budgeting.
- Many people self-sabotage from the beginning because they see budgeting as limiting or restrictive.
- The reality is that budgeting can actually be liberating if done well.
- You should see budgeting as making a plan for your money, rather than a list of things you can’t have.
Step 2: Recognize your strengths and weaknesses regarding your spending habits.
- Most people tend to have either “spender” or “saver” personalities. Both come with their pros and cons. It’s important to recognize the value of your financial spending style so you can plan for it.
Step 3: Make sure you understand the difference between wants and needs.
- Needs = Food, Shelter, Transportation and Clothing (“4 Walls”)
- Wants = Almost everything else
- Prioritize assets over liabilities (“Rich Dad, Poor Dad”). Wealthy people use their assets to buy liabilities.
Step 4: Choose a budgeting tool that works for you.
- In other words, don’t try to force yourself to use pen and paper if you prefer an app. If you’re uncomfortable with using a certain budgeting method, you won’t stick to it long-term.
- These days, there are more financial resources at our disposal than ever before. Feel free to experiment with different budgeting apps and products until you find one that’s right for you. The right tool can actually make budgeting fun!
- A few apps I personally recommend: Mint, Every Dollar and YNAB
Step 5: Seek help/accountability if you need it.
- If you’re married, this is your spouse. If you’re single, choose a close friend or family member to hold you accountable.
- If you’re not knowledgeable about money and budgeting, consider taking personal finance classes or hiring a financial advisor to help you learn the basics.

Action Step: Figure out where you are on the list of steps mentioned in this episode, and work your way through the rest.

Resources:

"Fewer Americans are Budgeting in 2019 -- Although They Think Everyone Else Should" https://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/fewer-americans-are-budgeting-in-2019----although-they-think-everyone-else-should-300824384.html
"A shocking number of Americans are living paycheck to paycheck" https://www.marketwatch.com/story/a-shocking-number-of-americans-are-living-paycheck-to-paycheck-2020-01-07
Episode 5: “5 Personal Finance Books That Changed My Life”

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Most women experience a lot of pressure to get married and have children by a certain age. The truth is that there are many benefits in being single, and if you’re only focused on pursuing marriage, you can miss them.

Debunking myths about single hood:

Myth #1: Marriage is a reward for good behavior in single hood. The reality is that marriage comes with its own set of troubles and challenges. Even healthy marriages have their downsides.
Myth #2: Single hood is a negative thing and single women must have something wrong with them. Single hood is not punishment for being promiscuous or not going to church. Many churches in particular have done a terrible job of shaming single women for their singleness, and that needs to change.
Myth #3 (Unpopular opinion): I'm concerned about the narrative that says you need to spend years “preparing to be a wife.” Premarital counseling and books are important, but be careful not to base your whole identity on whether you get married or not. That kind of message comes dangerously close to idolatry.

It’s not wrong to desire marriage. You can “be content in your singleness” while still desiring a husband. You just need to keep that desire in its proper place.

5 Things to Focus On When You're Single

Spend time with God.
Singles are able to fully devote themselves to God. Married people, in contrast, are focused on each other---“their interests are divided” (1 Corinthians 7:32-35).
Paul argues that single hood is actually a gift, and it’s his personal preference for everyone (1 Corinthians 7:7).
Again, it’s okay to desire marriage, but don’t make it an idol. If all your prayer time is spent asking for a husband, there’s a problem.
Heal from the trauma in your past.
The earlier you heal from your mental and emotional baggage, the less likely you are to bring them into your marriage.
Get clear about your calling.
You are a whole, complete person with a whole entire calling outside of your future husband. It's good to support your husband, but don't dismiss your own dreams and God-given purpose just to focus on his.
Invest in your relationships, especially friendships.
Friendships provide support, encouragement and accountability, which is even more important in singlehood.
Do something that helps your community.
Serving helps you maintain gratitude and avoid obsessing about your own needs.

Action Step: Choose one of the 5 suggestions mentioned in this episode and focus on it for the next 30 days.

References:

Episode 2: “Purpose, Calling, Assignment: What’s the Difference?”
Episode 5: “5 Questions to Help You Discover Your Calling”

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Guiding Scripture: “We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” (2 Corinthians 10:5)

Famous quote: “Watch your thoughts, they become your words; watch your words, they become your actions; watch your actions, they become your habits; watch your habits, they become your character; watch your character, it becomes your destiny.” (Unknown)

Most people have no idea how out of control their thought life really is. This is a big problem, because your thoughts influence virtually every aspect of your life in some way. Here are a few suggestions to help you get your thought life in order:

Think about what you’re thinking about.

Take time to pay attention to your thoughts throughout the day. How often does your mind wander? How long does it take you to notice when it does?

What are you listening to and why?

What kind of music do you listen to? How does it make you feel when you listen to it?
What kind of news do you consume? How does it make you feel when you listen to it?
There’s a difference between being informed and being influenced. When the information you’re consuming begins to affect your mood, you’re being influenced.

Who are you listening to and why?

Consider the different voices you hear throughout your day, i.e., podcasters, social media influencers, coworkers, etc. How do you feel when you listen to them? Are they uplifting you or bringing you down?

Be willing to course-correct if your thought life gets off track.

Read the Bible for a Godly perspective.
Seek God in prayer.
Talk to other Christ followers who can validate your perspective.
I tell my son, “You can’t always control the thoughts that come into your head, but you can control whether or not they stay there.”
At the end of the day, you have to choose where to focus your mind.

Action Step: Conduct a “thought audit” of your thought life this week. Make changes to the information and voices you’re listening to if necessary.

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Sometimes life is just hard for seemingly no reason. You put out one fire and three more spring up in its place. What do you do when that happens?

I take care of pressing physical needs first.
- In other words, if I’m exhausted, I rearrange my schedule to get some sleep. If I’m starving, I drop whatever can wait and eat. If I’m sick, I force myself to rest.
- It helps to be aware of your emotional triggers here. We all have trouble making good decisions when we’re stressed, but the specifics can differ. My husband struggles with his temper when he’s hungry, while I’m a mess when I’m sleep-deprived.
I find a few minutes to spend time alone with God.
- This is helpful for two reasons. First, it gives me a chance to vent about what’s causing me stress. Second, it allows God to give me direction about what comes next.
- When I think I don’t have time for God, those are the times when I most need to make time for Him. (Mary and Martha reference, Luke 10:38-42)
I vent to a friend or family member.
- I’ve noticed that a lot of Christ followers do all their venting to either God or other people, but not both. God designed us to rely on both Him and other people; it’s not either/or, it’s both/and.
- Make sure you’re venting to the right people, people who will feed your faith instead of your dysfunction.
I ask for help.
- This might be the most difficult step to execute. Many of us either don’t have the support we need, or we don’t want to take advantage of the support we have.
- If you don’t have a support system, you need to make building one a priority. Go to church, join clubs, etc.
- If you do have support, humble yourself and ask for it. Don’t have a nervous breakdown because of pride.
I accept help when it’s offered.
- Sometimes you need help, but you don’t know what to ask for. The best friends will just do without asking first. When that help comes, accept it without fighting.

Action Step: If you’re feeling overwhelmed right now, choose at least one of the suggestions from this episode and try it this week. If it helps, make it one of your go-to coping mechanisms from now on.

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Perfectionism is one of those flaws that we don’t really consider a flaw. In many circles, it’s normalized and even encouraged.
I used to embrace perfectionism. Now, I call myself a “recovering perfectionist.”

Perfectionism is a double-edged sword. That’s why it’s so hard to give up. It comes with certain benefits:
- Perfectionism pushes you toward excellence and accomplishment. In fact, some researchers argue that there is a “healthy” level of perfectionism that is related to high standards, motivation and discipline.
- Perfectionism is rewarded by society.
- Perfectionism sometimes makes you feel better about yourself, albeit in small, superficial ways.
The downside, however, is that perfectionism comes at a steep price:
- It’s linked with a number of mental health issues, including depression, anxiety, OCD and low self-esteem.
- At its worst, perfectionism makes you feel like even your best efforts are never good enough, which can lead to discouragement and despair.
- Ironically, perfectionism can keep you from taking risks, learning and developing new skills due to the fear of making mistakes.
How I became a “recovering” perfectionist:
- I recognized that my best efforts aren’t good enough for God, and they don’t have to be.
- I studied the Bible to affirm my identity as a child of God.
- I changed to a big-picture perspective that highlights purpose, legacy and faith.
- I remind myself that “done and good enough” is always better than “perfect and never done.”
- As a rule, I try to limit self-criticism. In other words, I choose to celebrate my wins, rather than complaining about my losses.
Action Steps:
1. If you’re a Christian, study the use of the word “righteous” in the Bible. How is this word used to describe us? Why is it significant that God has made us righteous?
2. If you’re not a Christian, consider the last time you were tempted to make something in your life “perfect.” Brainstorm some ways to approach that situation with a “done is better than perfect” mentality. How can you handle things differently next time?
Resources:
1. Article: “The Dangerous Downsides of Perfectionism” https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20180219-toxic-perfectionism-is-on-the-rise

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“If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.” - African proverb

Humans in general are wired for relationships, and women in particular tend to define our happiness by the quality of our relationships.

According to Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, our need to feel loved and belong comes before our need for esteem and self-actualization. In other words, it’s hard to achieve your full potential if you don’t feel supported.

What do you do when the people you love most don’t support your God-given purpose?

First, ask yourself who is the “they” that’s not supporting you? Be honest. Many people get distracted when strangers don’t support them, even though the people who matter most are supportive.
Next, make sure you’re seeing the situation clearly. Sometimes our loved ones have good reasons for being skeptical about our choices.
- Take a self-inventory of your actions here. Have you bounced from one idea to another without much follow through?
- If you’ve been inconsistent, you need to offer clear, quantifiable results in order to win over doubters.
- For example, if your husband doubts your ability to start a business, you may want to find a way to bootstrap it until you earn an income. Once you’re actually making money, he’s much more likely to support you.
Make sure you’re being realistic in your definition of “support.” For example, just because you open a business doesn’t mean your family and friends have to (or even should) buy from you. Many people experience unnecessary hurt when they had unrealistic expectations of their loved ones in the first place.
If your loved ones truly are being toxic, you need to create a new support system. A few places to start:
- Your church (small groups are a great place for mentorship and encouragement)
- Local organizations that mirror your interests (i.e., entrepreneurship clubs if you’re starting a business)
- Online forums, especially Facebook groups

Action Step: Take 30 minutes to create a list of 5 people in your life who currently support your life choices. If you can't come up with 5 people, use the suggestions listed above to help you meet people who can potentially become your new support system.

References:

https://www.simplypsychology.org/maslow.html

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We live in a highly unfocused and easily distracted society. A few statistics that prove this:

Distracted driving is the number 1 cause of car accidents in the U.S.
Distractions cost U.S. companies $650 billion per year on average.
The average internet user spends 5 years and 4 months of their life on social networks.

So, how do we become more focused? The Bible has a lot to say about this:

Keep God and His kingdom first (Matthew 6:33).
Fix or set your thoughts on Godly things (Phillippians 4:8, Colossians 3:2, Hebrew 3:1).
Take every thought captive that goes against what we know about God (2 Corinthians 10:5).

Focus is just as much about what we choose not to pay attention to as it is what we do pay attention to.

It’s difficult to remove a negative habit without adding a new one in its place, and vice versa.
For example, it’s hard to give up foods that are bad for you without having a plan to eat healthier foods instead.
There are only so many hours in a day. When you choose to focus more on one area of your life, you’re choosing to focus less on another area by default.

5 areas where you need focus most:

Faith: Are you pursuing God and maintaining a strong relationship with Him?
Health: Do you feel healthy and strong most of the time?
Relationships: What are your core values? Are you all going the same direction?
Career: Are you working toward a destination or just trying to get to payday?
Money: What financial goals do you have?

What I’m focused on right now:

My walk with God: Am I seeking Him and His purpose for my life?
My family: Loving my husband and children well (5 Love Languages)
My health: Adding more vegetables to my diet, getting up earlier and exercising
My career: Writing projects and the Purpose Without Apology podcast

Action Steps:

Choose one area of your life that needs more of your attention, and commit to focusing on that area for the next 30 days.
Choose one aspect of your life that needs less attention from you, and spend less time on it over the next 30 days.

Resources:

https://www.businessinsider.com/millionaire-study-wealth-factors-confidence-focus-2019-1
https://www.inc.com/jeff-haden/the-6-high-performance-habits-only-the-most-extrao.html
https://stopad.io/blog/interrupted-work-statistics

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Guiding Scripture: "The end of a matter is better than its beginning, and patience is better than pride." (Ecclesiastes 7:8 NIV)

Right now, a lot of life coaches and social media influencers are giving detailed strategies for how to prepare for the new year. Personally, I like to keep things simple. Here's a list of the things I have been doing (and will continue to do) as we leave 2019 and head into 2020:

Pray and seek God’s direction for the new year (Proverbs 3:5-6).
Have a year-in-review meeting with my husband.
Check in with my kids about their goals and possibly update them.
Spend time catching up with my closest friends and ask how I can support them better.
Revisit and update my goals and dreams. I have monthly, quarterly and annual goals, along with a basic 5-year plan that I check---and revise---regularly.
Make time to rest. Don’t miss this step. It’s a critical one that so many women miss for many reasons, and when we do, we pay the price.

Action Steps:

Schedule time to do a “year-in-review” with your family (or an accountability partner if you’re single). Put in on your calendar so it doesn’t get lost in the holiday chaos.
Make as much time for rest and self-care as possible, even if it’s just an hour or two. Try to set aside an entire day if you can.

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Relationship Goals are based on comparison.

You will never find happiness trying to imitate someone else’s dynamic. It’s like trying to wear an outfit in your friend’s size. It may fit her, but it will look strange on you.
What works for another couple may not work for you. Or, it works okay for you, but something else could work better.

Relationship Goals are based on illusions rather than reality.

You never know what’s really going on with your favorite couple behind closed doors.
Most families have dark secrets behind a happy facade (ex. Abusive husbands, fathers with secret families, etc.)

Relationship Goals are based on superficial traits, and rarely the traits that matter most.

You’re not in the right mental or emotional place to have relationship goals.

If you’re not in a good place mentally, you are much more likely to mistake toxic relationships for healthy ones.

Relationship Goals can (and should) change over time. What works in one season doesn’t work in another. This is why many marriages end after the children leave home.

What to do instead of pursuing #RelationshipGoals:

Listen to advice from people who have healthy, lasting relationships and have a dynamic similar to yours.
Study relationship advice from educated, professional experts (Ex. The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman).
Seek professional counseling to help you get to the root of any problems you have, so you can improve.
Practice trial and error. Sometimes you won’t know if a certain strategy works unless you try it.

At the end of the day, you need to create your own relationship goals. Figure out what works best for you and stick to that.

Action Steps:

If you’re in a relationship (dating or married), set aside time with your significant other to discuss what a strong relationship looks like for you. Make a plan to improve in areas where you may be struggling.
If you’re single, take time to really consider what a healthy relationship looks like to you. Be clear about your non-negotiables and areas where you can be flexible.

The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts

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Guiding Scripture: Many are the plans in a person's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails. (Proverbs 19:21)

At some point in your life, God will ruin your plans. Here’s why:

He has His own plans for us (Jeremiah 29:11).
His plans are better than ours (Isaiah 55:8-9).
He wants us to trust Him even when we don’t understand (Proverbs 3:5-6).

When God ruins your plans, you have two choices: You can either fight God and hang onto your plan, or let go and embrace His.

How God ruined my plans:

I planned to become an attorney, but God led me to change my career track during my senior year of college.
I planned to pursue a career before starting a family, but God sent my husband to me in high school, which led to me getting married and having children at a young age.
I planned to be comfortable financially, but God allowed my husband and me to struggle with money for many years.
One of my biggest struggles has been that I planned to work in a traditional 9-to-5 job, but God called me to become a stay-at-home/work-at-home mom.

Key Point: Your ruined plans will often be someone else’s dream life. That doesn’t make them any less ruined for you.

3 things to do when God ruins your plans:

Feel your feelings and take them to God. You’re human, and it’s okay to be disappointed.
Next, ask God why He ruined your plans and what He wants you to learn from it.
Be obedient and make a new plan with God’s help.

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Entrepreneurship is on the rise, especially for women. A few facts:

According to a study from American Express, the number of women-owned businesses increased by 114 percent between 1997 and 2017, a rate 2.5 times higher than the national average. In 2018, 11.6 million U.S. businesses were women-owned and generated more than $1.7 trillion in revenue.
Women with established businesses rate their well-being almost three times higher than women who aren’t entrepreneurs, and 1.6 times higher than their male counterparts. 68 percent of women owners run their businesses from home, and 78 percent of female entrepreneurs believe they’ve achieved work-life balance.
71 percent of new women-owned businesses launched each day are owned by women of color, with Black women as the fastest-growing group of entrepreneurs.

Entrepreneurship is an especially appealing option for women due to:

Flexibility
More opportunities for growth
More control over income
The ability to pursue personal interests and passions

Many times, especially for marginalized groups, entrepreneurship is a necessity due to a lack of traditional workplace opportunities. This was my experience.

There’s a difference between being an entrepreneur and an employer:

An entrepreneur is anyone who goes into business for themselves. This often includes businesses with only one employee (the business creator). People who “own their jobs” in this way are known as solopreneurs.
An employer is a person or company that provides a job paying wages or a salary to one or more people
It’s possible to be an entrepreneur without being an employer. In fact, most entrepreneurs are. According to the Small Business Administration, over 70 percent of businesses in the United States are owned and operated by sole proprietors.

You don't have to quit your job! You can always start and run a part-time business, either on its own or in addition to your current job. Expand your thinking about entrepreneurship.

Even if you don’t want to own a business, you should at least have multiple streams of income. Here are a few suggestions:

Investments: If you don’t want to own a business, owning stock in someone else’s business is the next best thing.
Real estate: Buying and holding property will provide you with cash flow, which ensures you can pay your bills even if you lose your 9 to 5.

Action Step: Go back to the information you wrote down about your calling and assignment from episodes #2 and #5. Use that information to brainstorm ideas for a potential side hustle.

Resources:

Episode 2: “Purpose, Calling, Assignment: What’s the Difference?”
Episode 5: “5 Questions to Help You Discover Your Calling”
"25 Intriguing Facts About the State of Female Entrepreneurship" from Startup Nation

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What is grace?

In many church traditions, grace is defined as “getting the good things that you don’t deserve,” while mercy is “not getting the bad things that you do deserve.”
My favorite definition comes from a former pastor of mine. He defined grace as “God doing for us what we can’t do for ourselves.”
Reference Scriptures:
2 Corinthians 12:8-9
Ephesians 2:8-9
Romans 5:15

What is “the gap”?

“The gap” is the place where your best efforts fail. You can only get so far in your own strength before you either burn out or give up or both.
This could be anything from losing patience with your toddler to juggling the needs of a blended family to struggling with chronic illness.
The gap is where you realize your need for God. It doesn’t have to be rock bottom, but it often is.

Fortunately, God makes His grace available to us in a variety of ways (Hebrews 4:16):

It helps us to endure things that are uniquely hard (2 Corinthians 12:8-9).
It empowers us to serve and do other good things we normally couldn’t (1 Peter 4:10).
It literally makes salvation possible (Ephesians 2:8-9).

What does this mean?

We don’t have to be afraid of experiencing hardship, because God promises that He will sustain us.
We also don’t have to be afraid to take a “leap of faith” and try something new, because God will equip us.
He did all the work to help us “get” saved and “keep” our salvation.

What inspired this episode:

Recently, my son was sick with pneumonia, and of course, I put a lot of things on the back burner so I could take care of him. One of those things was this podcast. I fell behind and didn't release an episode last week.
At first, I felt guilty about failing to keep my commitment, but then I realized the importance of giving myself grace and receiving grace from a God who loves me. As women, we don't have to be perfect; God gives us the grace to be human, and we should do the same for ourselves.

Action Step: What are some areas of your life where you need an extra measure of grace right now? List them and pray about them in detail over the next 7 days.

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Disclaimer: I am not a psychologist, therapist or licensed counselor. The details of this episode are shared for informational purposes only and are no substitute for professional counseling. If you suffer from depression, suicidal thoughts or any other form of mental illness, please seek professional help immediately.

5 Common Myths About Depression

Myth 1: You just need to be positive, eat healthy, exercise, etc. Reality: Depression kills your willpower, so you literally can’t do the things you know you should do to take care of yourself.
Myth 2: Depression is “weakness,” so people who are depressed are weak. Reality: Depression can affect anyone under the right circumstances, even people who have lived years or decades without it.
Myth 3: Only people who have been through serious trauma are depressed. Reality: Although depression is often triggered by trauma, it can affect anyone of any background, race, religion, etc.
Myth 4: People who are depressed/commit suicide are “selfish.” Reality: Depression breaks your perspective so you think you’re helping your loved ones by ending your life. (Ex. broken glasses)
Myth 5: Christians just need to pray away depression. Reality: Just like Christians go to the doctor for physical ailments, it’s okay for them to seek professional help for mental illness.

The Do's and Don'ts of Helping Someone with Depression

Do educate yourself about the signs and symptoms of depression.
Don’t be fooled by the “strong friend” or “happy friend”
Don’t lecture or offer advice about how to “fix" depression if you've never experienced it.
Do offer practical resources and support (for ex., research to find a good counselor and give them the number, or offer to take them to the appointment).
Do call/text regularly to “check in” and let your loved one know you’re thinking about them. This is especially helpful for people who have words of affirmation as a love language.
Do be willing to be inconvenienced for awhile, at least until the initial crisis period is over. Recovery takes time.

Resources if You (or Someone You Know) is Suffering from Depression

World Health Organization
National Suicide Prevention Hotline
Mental Health America
The National Network of Depression Centers
The National Alliance on Mental Illness
Mental Health Grace Alliance
If you're a Christian, consider reaching out to your local church for Christian-specific resources. Christian counselors can give advice and insight about the spiritual aspects of depression.

Action Steps:

If someone you love is struggling with depression, check out the resources listed here and brainstorm some ways you can help them.

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Disclaimer: I am not a licensed counselor or therapist. The details of this episode are shared for informational purposes only and are no substitute for professional counseling. If you suffer from depression, suicidal thoughts or any other form of mental illness, please seek professional help immediately.

My History with Depression

My depression began when I was a teenager, probably triggered by conflict with my parents. I ran away from home at 16, which only made my symptoms worse.
Things came to a head during my junior year in college. I got into a heated argument with my roommate, which triggered deeper levels of depression and thoughts of suicide. I began to see a counselor, learned some coping mechanisms and got married later that year.
A year into my marriage, I graduated college. I struggled to find work and soon got pregnant with my son, which increased my depression and suicidal thoughts even more (they never really went away). I returned to counseling and started taking medication. At this point, I was healthy enough to be functional, but I hadn't fully recovered yet.
A few years later, my family moved back to Texas to be closer to my parents. I became active in a church and found support from other women like me. Over the next five years, I began to heal and to feel like myself again.

How I Overcame My Depression

Medication: This isn’t the right option for everyone, but it was for me. Make sure you discuss side effects in detail with your doctor before you start on medication.
Counseling: I have met with both Christian counselors and pastors, which helped me in different ways.
Mentorship/Discipleship: Older women who had similar experiences poured into me and gave me a healthier perspective on life.
Building Support Systems: My husband, friends and family are there for me during dark episodes and know how to support me through them.
Prayer/Bible study: My relationship with God was pretty erratic for a long time, but once I got healthier, it became strong.
Self-Care: Diet, exercise, healthy amounts of sleep, etc.

Resources if You're Suffering from Depression

World Health Organization
National Suicide Prevention Hotline
Mental Health America
The National Network of Depression Centers
The National Alliance on Mental Illness
Mental Health Grace Alliance
If you're a Christian, consider reaching out to your local church for Christian-specific resources. Christian counselors can give advice and insight about the spiritual aspects of depression.

Action Steps:

If you're suffering from depression or another form of mental illness, check out at least one of the resources listed here as soon as possible.
If you know someone who is suffering, share this episode of the podcast with them.

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A lot of personal finance advice is geared toward married couples, but single women have their own struggles with money that need to be addressed. This episode is designed to do just that, and in a way that doesn't have to be intimidating or overwhelming.
Disclaimer: I am not a financial advisor or CPA. The details of this podcast are shared for informational purposes only. Please seek assistance from a certified finance professional who can help you with your unique situation.
1. Set a monthly budget and stick to it.

There are a lot of excellent budgeting apps out there, but I personally recommend the following:
Every Dollar
YNAB
Mint
All of these apps link to your bank account and encourage you to assign a job to every dollar that comes into it. They also make it easy for you to set and reach short-term financial goals.
Find a reliable accountability partner.
This should be someone you can trust with your sensitive financial information (income, debt, financial goals, etc.)
This person must be someone who makes wise choices with money.
Ideally, this person should also be your financial opposite, meaning they are a spender if you are a saver. Spenders and savers both have their strengths and weaknesses and need each other for balance.
Make an effort to develop friendships with financially responsible people.
“You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.” - Motivational speaker Jim Rohn
Avoid "H.A.L.T." spending (spending when you're hungry, angry, lonely or tired) and emotional spending in general.
For example, you should avoid going to the grocery store when you’re hungry.
At the same time, "loneliness spending" could be going out and spending money just to avoid staying at home alone.
Be aware of your personal spending triggers. (i.e., “treat yourself syndrome”)
Set and pursue financial goals for your future, regardless of whether or not you get into a relationship.
In other words, don’t attach your financial future to a hypothetical relationship that may or may not happen.

Action Steps:

Choose a budgeting app, download it and begin to familiarize yourself with it.
Identify at least one person in your life who could serve as your accountability partner.
Identify your spending triggers and brainstorm ways to avoid giving into them.
Create a list of financial goals for the future and set dates for when you would like to achieve them.

References:

Episode 4 - "5 Personal Finance Books That Changed My Life"

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Everyone needs a Student. This is someone you can pour into and who is behind you in a certain area of life.

Many people underestimate the value of the student role because they are self-centered, and it doesn't seem to benefit them.
However, having a student in your life can strengthen your own knowledge in a certain area and give you a fresh perspective on it.

Everyone needs a Teacher. This is someone who is ahead of you in some area and can pour into you.

A teacher can be either a mentor or a coach. Make sure you know the difference and are very intentional about which one you bring into your life.
A coach is typically someone you pay to help you develop skills in a specific area over time. This relationship is typically hands on and professional in tone.
A mentor is usually someone you do not pay to help you grow and develop as a person. This relationship is much more informal and tends to be more personal in nature.
You can approach most coaches at any time (as long as they're taking on clients), but with mentors, you must be more sensitive to their schedules.
Coaches and mentors are not the same as therapists or surrogate parents. They are often extremely busy and do not have time for coddling or intense emotional support.

Everyone needs a Friend. This is someone who is basically on the same level as you, so the two of you can encourage each other.

Age may or may not be a factor. In other words, you can be a teacher to someone older than you or a student to someone younger than you, depending on the context.
Different seasons of your life may require an imbalance of these relationships. In general, you should expect to have more teachers when you’re younger and more students as you get older, while friends are necessary at every stage of life. (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10)
Use your network to connect with people in each of these categories. This can include church and other social organizations, your workplace or online groups/masterminds.
One resource I have used for years is Meetup.com. This website allows you to search for people who have similar interests to yours and meet in your area. I've used it to find several great writing groups that have greatly enriched my social life.

Action Steps:

Take 5-10 minutes to identify which people in your life fall into each of the three categories of relationships described in this episode (student, teacher, friend).
If you don’t know anyone who meets the criteria for one or more of these categories, jot down some ideas for how you can meet people who might fill these roles.

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What am I better at than most people?
- It’s not enough for you to do something well. Something you’re good at is a gift, but something you’re exceptional at is more likely to be your calling.
- For example, I think I'm a good cook, but I'm not good enough to become a chef. I am, however, better than most people at writing.
- Thinking about your gifts in general terms will keep you confused. You need to drill down and focus if you want clarity.
What do I love to do?
- There is a lot of debate online about whether you should pursue "passion or profit." I think that misses the point. Your passion is an important part of who you are, and it needs to be acknowledged, even if you don't make a living pursuing it.
- Your passions can change over time. Some passions are only for a season, and that’s okay.
- It’s also fine to have more than one passion.
What makes you angry and keeps you up at night?
- For example, I have a friend who loves animals and hates when they're abused, which led to her taking a job as a veterinarian assistant.
What problems are you uniquely equipped to solve?
- As queen of Persia, Esther was able to use her royal position and her connection to the Jewish people to save them from destruction.
- As a wealthy German businessman, Oskar Schindler was able to save over 1,200 Jewish people from being sent to concentration camps during World War II.
- Look at your upbringing, culture, personality and personal history to help you identify what problems you can solve that few others can.
Who are your people?
- I like to call this your “belong group.” In other words, these are the people who speak your language and respond to your ideas with enthusiasm and support.
- In business, this is your audience. In church, it may be your area of ministry.
- No one is called to everyone. Even Jesus was limited in his area of ministry (See Matthew 15:24).

Action Step:Take 30 minutes to answer the 5 questions outlined in this episode. Did any of your answers surprise you? If so, how?

References:

Episode 2: "Purpose, Calling, Assignment: What's the Difference?"

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Financial Peace Revisited/The Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey
- Dave Ramsey is one of the most well-known personal finance experts in our generation. I took his Financial Peace University course and read his book, Financial Peace Revisited, when I was in my early 20's.
- I haven't read The Total Money Makeover, but since that's his most popular book and most of the principles overlap with Financial Peace Revisited, I included both here.
- Dave Ramsey is best known for creating the Baby Steps to help people get out of debt and build wealth.
- I don't agree with all of Dave Ramsey's teachings (particularly about eliminating debt), but his materials provide a solid foundation in personal finance overall.
Rich Dad, Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki
- Robert Kiyosaki is another well-known personal finance expert whose teachings are on the opposite end of the spectrum as Dave Ramsey.
- One of the major takeaways for me in this book was the idea that "the poor work for money, while the rich make money work for them".
- Kiyosaki is also known for his argument that "your house is not an asset." Assets, according to him, are things that put money in your pocket, while liabilities take money out. Therefore, the fastest way to build wealth is to buy as many assets as possible.
The Cashflow Quadrant by Robert Kiyosaki
- In this book, Robert Kiyosaki takes a lot of the ideas he explained in Rich Dad, Poor Dad and expands on them. The Cashflow Quadrant is a helpful visual for these new ideas.
- In summary, the "E Quadrant" (which stands for "Employee") and the "S Quadrant" (which stands for "Small Business") are on the left side of the quadrant. It is generally more difficult to build wealth from these quadrants.
- The "B Quadrant" (which stands for "Business Owner") and the "I Quadrant" (which stands for "Investor") are on the right side of the quadrant. Most wealth is built from these quadrants.
The Millionaire Next Door by Thomas J. Stanley
- Here in the U.S., we associate wealthy people with lavish lifestyles, like actors, musicians and athletes. I love the way Thomas Stanley turns this notion on its head.
- Based on detailed research, Stanley describes how the "average" American millionaire looks, thinks and behaves, and the results are often quite surprising.
Family Wealth: Keeping it in the Family by James E. Hughes, Jr.
- Hughes describes how families keep their wealth from one generation to the next.
- He also explains the details of trusts, intergenerational family meetings and limiting taxes.
Action Step: Read or listen to the audio version of one of the books on this list.

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Women today have more responsibilities and demands on their time than ever. Many of us juggle work, family obligations, household tasks, social obligations and more. And society expects us to do it all flawlessly. Is that even possible? Can women really "have it all" at the end of the day? The short answer is yes...and no. It depends. Let's look at both sides of this discussion and see what we can discover:

Show Notes:

3 Reasons It Can Be Difficult to “Have it All”

Life is full of limitations. There are only so many hours in the day, and there is an opportunity cost to every choice you make. This is especially challenging for women because in addition to working, we still do the majority of domestic tasks in our household. We have more juggling to do than men overall.
"Having it all" looks different in every season (Ecclesiastes 3:1). What works in one season won't work in another. For example, "having it all" when you're single looks different from "having it all" once you're married.
Life is defined by change. Even if you achieve perfect balance, it won’t last.

3 Reasons You Can “Have it All”

Since “having it all” looks different for different people, you can identify what version of it works for you.
You can learn to embrace whatever season of life you’re in and be content.
Since life is defined by change, you can always change your mind if things aren't working. It's never too late to position yourself to have a more meaningful and purpose-filled life.

3 Ways to “Have it All” Right Where You Are

Get brutally honest about the season you’re in right now.
Recognize the consequences of the choices you’ve made.
Identify what resources and systems you need to get the most enjoyment out of your current season.

Action Steps:

Write a paragraph that describes what “having it all” looks like for you in this season of your life. What do your relationships, career and finances look like? How much time are you devoting to each one?
Write another paragraph in which you identify at least 3 obstacles that are currently keeping you from “having it all.” What systems and resources do you need to put in place in order to overcome these obstacles?
Write a third paragraph brainstorming how you might obtain the tools and resources necessary to meet the goals listed above.

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Welcome to another episode of Purpose Without Apology! In this episode, I explain the difference between purpose, calling and assignment. These words are used interchangeably all the time in church settings, but how many of us really understand what they mean? Here, I break it all down into simple terms that you can easily apply to your everyday life.

Show Notes:
What is purpose?

According to Collins Dictionary, purpose is known as "the reason for which something is made or done"
Our purpose as Christ followers boils down into 3 parts:
We exist to glorify God. (1 Peter 2:9)
We exist to do good. (Ephesians 2:10)
We exist to expand the kingdom of God by way of the Great Commission. (Matthew 28:18-20)

What is calling?

According to Webster-Merriam, a calling is "a strong inner impulse toward a particular course of action, especially when accompanied by conviction of divine influence." It is also defined as "the vocation or profession in which one customarily engages."
While purpose is a broader, more overarching term for why we exist, calling is more specific. It refers to your gifts, talents and abilities. (Ephesians 2:10)
Calling can include what you do either professionally or personally. (Romans 8:28) For example, being gifted at graphic design and mentoring women in a weekly bible study can both be examples of your calling in action.
Calling can be a role or status in society. (ex. You can be called to foster or adopt children, or to have a large family)

What is assignment?

According to Webster-Merriam, an assignment is "a specified task or amount of work assigned or undertaken as if assigned by authority"
While purpose and calling remain unchanged, an assignment is usually temporary, often limited to a certain season of time. (1 Corinthians 7:17)
If your calling refers to your gifts, your assignment refers to the specific tasks you do with those gifts. (ex. Being gifted at graphic design/artwork is a calling; working as a graphic designer is an assignment.)
You do not choose your purpose, calling or assignments. However, you can choosehow to partner with God in order to manifest them on Earth.
Purpose is not a tightrope. It’s not a prison. It’s a wide open field with a fence around it. In other words, God does give us some boundaries, but we also have more than enough room to explore and try new things.
You are meant to be empowered by your purpose, calling and assignment, not burdened by them.

Action Step:
Using the definitions given in this episode, take 30 minutes and define your purpose, calling and assignment as best you can.

Resources:
"The Truth About Finding Your Passion" - The Courtney Sanders Show, Episode 79

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Welcome to the very first episode of Purpose Without Apology! In this episode, I lay the groundwork for what this podcast is all about so you know what to expect. Be prepared to get motivated, challenged and pushed beyond the limits of your thinking.

Show Notes:
What is this podcast about?This is a podcast about topics that interest me and that I believe will interest you. Here are the main topics we'll be diving into on Purpose Without Apology:

Relationships: We'll discuss how to have healthy, life-giving relationships, particularly in marriage, family and parenthood.
Personal Finance: Wealth building is extremely important to me, so we will learn how to leave a legacy of wealth and righteousness for future generations.
Purpose: We'll discover how to walk out our God-given purpose in our personal and professional lives.

Who is this podcast for?Obviously, anyone is welcome to listen and learn from Purpose Without Apology, but I believe there are 4 groups of women in particular who will get the most out of it:

Millennial women: I think the topics we discuss will be especially helpful for young women between the ages of 20-40 who are seeking to discover why God put them on the planet and what they are called to do.
Black women: As an African-American woman, I'm passionate about issues that affect the Black community. This is not a podcast that is strictly about race, but my race does influence my perspective of the world, and I'm not afraid to embrace that here.
Multifaceted women: All women are multifaceted on some level, but this podcast is geared toward women who have a variety of interests and passions and are struggling to decide which ones they should pursue.
Women who want to change the world: 'Nuff said.

What can you expect when you listen?

You will be challenged and/or offended. We'll be discussing a lot of ideas about God, Christianity, the church, race and women that may make you uncomfortable. I have a gift for that kind of thing. Don't say I didn't warn you!
I am unapologetically a Christ follower. You will hear about God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit in most, if not every episode. I'm not a pastor or a theologian, so I'm not here to preach at you, but I have been walking with the Lord for most of my life. And I'm not afraid to tackle the hard questions about Him.
I am unapologetically Black. I don't hide my race or apologize for it. I don't think everything is "about race," so to speak, but I do believe in confronting racial issues and injustice when it's appropriate.
I am also unapologetically in favor of women's empowerment. I would call myself a feminist, but that word seems to trigger a lot of believers. So, let's just say I'm here to create a safe place where women can thrive.
You’ll get detailed, practical solutions to everyday problems. I love big, abstract ideas, but I prefer to-do lists. I also love to research, so you’ll get a lot of resources from people who are smarter than me.
You’ll get truth spoken in love. We live in a society where truth and love exist everywhere but rarely at the same time. My goal is to combine the truth of God's word with His unfailing love for us here every week.

Action Steps:

Subscribe to the podcast, listen to the first few episodes and write a review on iTunes.
Follow me at @lisacgant on Instagram and leave a comment. I'd love to know what YOU want to hear about next.

Purpose Without Apology: Recent Episodes

Lisa Gant