Don't Tell Ammu: Recent Episodes
Raida Khan
A too-honest podcast where host Raida Khan brings guests on to discuss their unfiltered experiences with life and love. Tune in every week to hear this Bengali-American Muslim gal and her friends spill their hearts out on the things they’ve always been too afraid to tell Ammu.
In this episode, Raida invites her two siblings, Raheeq & Ranya, on to discuss what an honor and pain it is to grow up with the host of Don't Tell Ammu. From Raheeq's bad memory to Raida's cursing problem to a bunch of other dumb sh!t, this is an exciting and informative episode, but mostly because the three of them flame each other for 50 minutes straight.
In this episode, Raida brings on her friend Noshin to discuss the double standards girls deal with growing up in a desi household. The two also talk about the pervasive issue of colorism in desi communities and share their thoughts on "mama's boys." Finally, the duo discusses peeing at night, embarrassing calculator histories, and spelling bee mishaps.
This episode is equal parts real and dumb. Enjoy!
I love you, Ammu.
In this episode, Raida invites her close friend Adam on to talk about how they went from "enemies" in high school to very good friends in college. The two discuss why Adam is known as the "cookie man," if friendship is possible when feelings are unreciprocated, and whether men or women have higher standards of love. Also, Adam believes the Zodiac Killer is lame, and Raida flames every single one of Adam's movie recs.
Anyway, enjoy us basically arguing for 70 mins straight.
In the final episode of 2020, Raida brings her pal Nahla on to discuss desi boys on TikTok, shenanigans at their local mosque, balancing relationships with friendships, and the harsh reality of being a Muslim kid in America. Also, Nahla auditions to be the DTA marketing manager while Raida recounts how eight-year-old Nahla used to make fun of her accent.
HAPPY NEW YEAR FAM
[Season 2, Episode 2.5]
In this episode, Raida wakes up at 6 AM just to groggily speak about everything going on in her life, including playing Valorant, receiving five mysterious bags of groceries, her experience working at a startup, and her lackluster love life. Oh, and Raida talks about the Zodiac Killer as though he's the most interesting thing in the world (he's not).
Raida's friends say this episode sounds depressing but honestly, she was just being quiet because her family was sleeping, and she herself had just woken up. Raida says she was actually quite happy when recording this episode LOL. But if you're looking for the usual upbeat Raida, don't listen to this moody ass episode. <3
In this episode, Raida brings her close friend Yasser on to discuss their empty love lives in great depth. The two also talk about why Kanye is misunderstood, how Raida's father became a local meme, the key to finding love on TikTok, the science to being a charming mf, and so much more. Also, stay till the end, because there's a fun little surprise.
It's one of the longest DTA episodes to date, so enjoy. If you think Raida's being mean to Yasser in any part of it, she is. He deserves it.
In this episode, Raida brings on one of her oldest friends (and neighbor of a decade!), Nasrynn, to discuss various 'expectation vs. reality' scenarios they've experienced in their lives. From bad first dates to embarrassing old emails to important life lessons, the two talk about it all.
Enjoy. My hands are so cold right now,
Hi. It's Bushra. This episode description is going to be a short love note from me to all of you.
First, let's go over the basics. This is my last time on DTA as co-host -- in this episode, we talk about why I'm leaving and what the podcast will look like moving forward. Raida and I get candid about how our friendship has been these past few months and where we stand now, and revisit our favorite question: are we still best friends? We also talk about love, because what else do we ever talk about (I may or may not have just gotten engaged, listen to find out), and I leave Raida with a parting gift as co-host: a prediction for when she'll find the man of her dreams.
Anyways -- thank you all for the love and support you've showered Raida and me with this past year. It's been an incredible journey and I feel so blessed to have been able to be a part of this amazing project. Hearing from and getting to know all of you has been one of the best parts of this podcast -- you all have been the kindest, ever, and I'm going to miss all of you so much. But I'm so excited to see what Raida does with DTA in the future, I know it's going to be amazing. If you ever want to say hi, or reach out for anything at all, you know where to find me. Sending you all so, so much love.
Signing off,
Bushra.
In this episode, Bushra and Raida discuss Mukbangs, Raida leaving her job, the recent wacky-ass Instagram updates, and their thoughts on a particular Bengali, Muslim influencer. Also, the duo, as stupid as ever, talk about where they see themselves in a decade.
Happy one year anniversary to your favorite dumbasses. You don't know why they do what they do, but don't worry, they also don't know why they do what they do. Was that hard to read? Good. Also, sorry we took a month and a half off. We thought we'd have more content after a month but then realized we don't do anything extraordinary with our lives except be brown. Ok.
In this episode, Bushra and Raida discuss Big B's new job, Big R's surprise party, and why they'll have impostor syndrome for the rest of their careers. The two also discuss the advice Raida received from her hair lady. They also talk about more, but Raida doesn't remember right now, so, yeah, enjoy!
Also, ya, this episode was recorded a week before we knew whether or not Orange Man was going to devastate our country for four more years. He's not, so thank you for voting.
In this week's episode, the two gals discuss dealing with burnout, improving family relationships, and managing anger. As a sweet bonus, Raida shares a horrifyingly embarrassing fart story, and Bushra confesses that her neck might be possessed
In this episode, Bushra and Raida discuss their recent trip together, what happens when you find a scorpion in your bathroom at 3 AM in the morning, kids hiding drugs in Raida's neighborhood bush, and the emotional intelligence of the guys in their lives.
TL;DR: We drill Big M with a bunch of personal questions. Enjoy.
In this episode, Bushra and Raida invite one of their favorite people ever, Muhammed, to talk about how guys feel in situations of love, cultural pressures, body image, and more. They also discuss awful first impressions, infamous San Francisco trips, and being holed up in a library together for more than 48 hours straight. Finally, Muhammed tells the two about overcoming the "nice guy" syndrome and what's most important to him in a relationship.
In this episode, Bushra and Raida answer more juicy questions guys are too afraid to ask girls, discuss the mispronunciation of their brown names (while Raida butchers some French words), and contemplate what would happen if just the two of them were ever stranded on a deserted island (TL;DR: cannabilism, but what is one to do?)
FYI: Raida's audio is muffled for only the first minute or so of the episode. It gets better!
In this week's episode, Raida and Bushra talk about how they both completely ruined their sleep schedules. The two discuss the value of handmade gifts, discovering the world of Minecraft, and the first trip they ever went on together. Raida also compares Bushra's newly published book to the legendary Taylor Swift album, 'folklore,' which is a little over the top but makes Bushra's entire year. They also struggle to explain how they felt about the Too Hot to Handle show and end up using the same descriptor over and over again: weird. Welcome to this week's unpredictable train of thought -- hope you can keep up.
Buy Bushra's book here
In this episode, Bushra and Raida discuss playing an emotional seven-hour game of Push the Button during their second quarantined Eid and ponder over the very purpose of Idaho. The two also explain the week-long ordeal that is a desi wedding. In between, Bushra tells Raida the kind of man she will one day marry, while Raida daydreams about marketing the podcast at Bushra's wedding.
Finally, they answer some questions that guys are too afraid to ask girls.
In this episode, Raida and Bushra open up about their insecurities and get real about the struggles that come with body dysmorphia. They also discuss their favorite scorpion-murder methods, Chloe Ting workout videos, and the popularization of breakup social media posts. Finally, Raida showers Bushra with compliments, which she regrets, and the two revisit the most pressing question ever asked on DTA: are Raida and Bushra still best friends?
Trigger Warning: Abuse + Physical Violence
In this episode, Raida and Bushra delve into a real life story and an in-depth discussion on domestic abuse in Bengali households.
Resources:
The National Domestic Violence Hotline
1-800-799-7233 (SAFE)
www.ndvh.org
National Dating Abuse Helpline
1-866-331-9474
www.loveisrespect.org
National Child Abuse Hotline/Childhelp
1-800-4-A-CHILD (1-800-422-4453)
www.childhelp.org
National Sexual Assault Hotline
1-800-656-4673 (HOPE)
www.rainn.org
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
1-800-273-8255 (TALK)
www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org
National Resource Center on Domestic Violence
1-800-537-2238
www.nrcdv.org and www.vawnet.org
Futures Without Violence: The National Health Resource Center on Domestic Violence
1-888-792-2873
www.futureswithoutviolence.org
National Center on Domestic Violence, Trauma & Mental Health
1-312-726-7020 ext. 2011
www.nationalcenterdvtraumamh.org
Break the Cycle
202-824-0707
www.breakthecycle.org
Domestic Violence Initiative
(303) 839-5510/ (877) 839-5510
www.dviforwomen.org
Asian and Pacific Islander Institute on Domestic Violence
1-415-954-9988
www.apiidv.org
Committee Against Anti-Asian Violence (CAAAV)
1-212- 473-6485
www.caaav.org
Institute on Domestic Violence in the African American Community
1-877-643-8222
www.dvinstitute.org
In this ultra-casual episode, which Raida claims "made her dumber," Bushra and Raida talk about a whole lot of nothing for 36 minutes. From Bushra's inability to consume fruit to a religious perspective on drawing faces to what is on their TikTok 'For You' pages, this stream of consciousness will make you regret ever getting into podcasts in the first place.
This is a fully-improvised episode. You have been warned.
In this episode, Bushra and Raida talk about how to be actively anti-racist and urge their South Asian community to challenge existing problematic mindsets and take action.
Helpful resources below:
Arizona Organizations to Donate to:
Black People’s Justice Fund - Metro Phoenix
Phoenix Mutual Aid Network
Puente Human Rights Network
National Organizations to Donate to:
George Floyd Memorial Fund
Justice for Breonna
Minnesota Freedom Fund
Black Visions Collective
Reclaim the Block
Campaign Zero
Unicorn Riot
The Bail Project
National Bail Out
National Bail Fund Network
Run With Maud
The Innocent Project
Anti Police-Terror Project
Essential Reading for Anti-Racism Work:
So You Want to Talk About Race by Ijeoma Oluo
This Book Is Anti-Racist by Tiffany Jewell
The New Jim Crow by Michelle Alexander
Me and White Supremacy by Layla F. Saad
How to Be an Antiracist by Ibram X. Kendi
White Fragility by Robin Diangelo
Why I'm No Longer Talking to White People About Race by Reni Eddo-Lodge
Between the World and Me by Ta-Nehisi Coates
Can We Talk about Race? by Beverly Daniel Tatum
My Grandmother's Hands by Resmaa Menakem
The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison
I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou
Shows and Films to Watch:
13th
American Son
See You Yesterday
If Beale Street Could Talk
When They See Us
Dear White People
Little Fires Everywhere
THe Hate U Give
Black Power Mixtape
Clemency
Fruitvale Station
Just Mercy
Selma
In this episode, Bushra and Raida are the most honest they've been in a while. From falling in love to heartbreak, they talk about it all.
In this episode, Raida and Bushra talk about seeing each other for the first time in months (from a distance) and what an absolutely jarring experience it was. They also talk about revisiting an old shared dream of theirs, while Raida debuts a song about love that could easily win the next Grammy. Somewhere in between, they talk about love (as though they understand it at all), how they're vibing halfway through Ramadan, and the time Raida stole the pillow from right under her mom's head while sleepwalking.
Enjoy!
In this episode, Raida grills Bushra for failing the online friendship quiz she made, while Bushra asks Raida to stop obsessing over Ted Bundy. Also, Raida thinks ghost hunting is a good first date, and Bushra thinks Raida is stupid. In between, the two discuss work struggles, their revised views on the evil eye, and how they're prepping themselves for a fully-quarantined Ramadan 2020.
Also, don't let this fact steer you away from the podcast, but did you know Bushra eats whole lemons as a snack? Yeah, I know, but look, we're all flawed in one way or another.
In this episode, Bushra and Raida discuss the concept of the “evil eye” in desi cultures. Raida is too skeptical about everything, and Bushra accidentally wears a white dress to a henna party. Also, Raida tries to tell the only jinn story that’s ever scared her (“tries”), and Bushra looks like Harriet Potter with the burn mark on her forehead.
Enjoy!
In this episode, Bushra and Raida talk about the shows they've been watching, the boys they've been loving (not really), and the things they've been doing. Raida is an idiot and finds difficulty in distinguishing between a tiger and a lion, and Bushra has a couple of screws loose and sleeps with a pillow over her head, instead of under.
Enjoy!
In this episode, Raida and Bushra bring some of their best friends on to talk about the double standards Desi girls face in the community. From having weird curfews to hiding their locations to getting blasted at dawats (Desi people parties), these girls talk about it all.
Of course, they're all still quarantined, and so, hearing six girls over Skype might pop one of your eardrums. You have been warned. Boom, boom, boom, I wanna hear you say Wayhoooo. Enjoy.
Desi---> ppl from Indian/Pakistan/Bangladesh, generally speaking.
Gorls---> what Bushra and Raida call girls because they're uneducated.
ft. Nasrynn, Noshin, Nahla, and Afra
Please forgive the subpar sound quality, as well as the occasional audio cut-outs.
In this episode, Bushra and Raida talk about the absurdity that is Love is Blind and the Bachelor, and imagine what life would be like if they were contestants. Bushra also reflects on her final year of college and discusses having her college graduation canceled due to the virus. In between, the two talk about reviving their motivation for the podcast, being lonely, and a ton of other things that prove a clear decline in intelligence as the episode progresses.
Anyways, welcome to episode 17--an auxiliary episode for you to listen to while you quarantined at home.
First and foremost, Raida and Bushra apologize for the extremely morbid title. In this episode, they talk about how their lives have changed since the escalation of the global pandemic. Also, Raida almost loses her shit trying to explain to Bushra a car crash she saw outside her bedroom window.
Enjoy episode 16*--hope you're all staying safe, healthy, and sane during this time.
*Please note that we're by no means trying to diminish the seriousness of the Coronavirus. We're simply providing a personal insight into our lives during this time, which is a constant balancing act of optimism and caution.
In this episode, Raida and Bushra recount their recent trip to San Francisco, which included getting approached by scary strangers on the street, accidentally running into the set of Matrix 4, and missing the chance to meet their lover, Jake Gyllenhaal. The two also discuss seeing each other cry for the first time ever and just how jarringly ugly that was.
Welcome to episode 15. It’s awful, but you’ll love it.
In this episode, which Raida almost lost her goddamn mind editing, the two talk about the job Bushra received literally six minutes before recording as well as Raida's new job. They also say a bunch of nonsensical bullcrap in between and throw in a couple tidbits about being a woman in the Computer Science world.
Welcome to episode 14; we're losing our shit.
Bushra and Raida open this week's episode by trying their hand at ASMR* (spoiler alert: Bushra sucks at it). The two also discuss the idea of a "pure" significant other, the reason brown people are often terrible at saying sorry, and the harsh consequences of unreciprocated love.
Enjoy, and if you enjoyed the episode, please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts! It helps us out a lot.
DTA Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/donttellammu/?hl=es
*ASMR segments are at the beginning and end of the episode. If you don't understand what Raida is saying, it's because she's speaking in Bangla.
In this week's episode, Raida and Bushra talk about their Valentine's Day traditions, the Jonas brothers, and their biggest insecurities. The two also discuss their pet peeves about each other, which is good, because maybe now Bushra won't flake on everything, and Raida might actually show up to something on time.
In this fully-improvised episode, Bushra and Raida talk about the atmosphere on their 77,000-person campus after a single student contracted the Coronavirus. They also talk about losing valuable friendships, making confessions, not being passive-aggressive, and why this episode almost didn't happen (and probably shouldn't have).
Enjoy!
In this episode, Raida and Bushra talk about the stigma of mental health in the desi community (also applicable to many other cultures). They discuss personal experiences, the mindset of their culture towards mental health, and ways to mitigate the taboo.
Helplines:
Crisis Text Line: text REASON to 741741
National Alliance on Mental Illness: 1-800-950-6264
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255
National Hopeline Network: 1-800-784-2433
National Council on Alcoholism & Drug Dependency: 1-800-622-2255
National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1- 800-799-7233
The one where Raida and Bushra let their friends run the show. An impromptu conversation about friendship, toxic individuals, defining success, and more.
Our Guests: Noshin, Alvi, & Raheeq
In today's episode, Bushra and Raida decide to go vegan, in hopes that it will give them more energy. The two also discuss a new movie, Hala, which debuted at the 2019 Sundance Film Festival and claims to show a realistic portrayal of a modern-day desi Muslim girl. Finally, Raida opens up about her experiences and struggles as a hijabi, while Bushra shares what it was like to be the only non-hijabi in her elementary and middle school.
After not seeing each other for an entire month, Raida and Bushra are finally back together, curious to see if their highly-celebrated friendship is still intact. In the span of 48 minutes, the two recount their winter breaks, discuss their goals for the new year, and talk about growing up as first-generation Bengali Americans and the effect that has on their experiences in the motherland. And due to jetlag, or maybe inherent idiocy, this episode offers much more than just that.
Happy 2020! We hope this year brings you happiness, but more importantly, a greater appreciation for this podcast.
In the final episode of 2019, which, in the words of Bushra, sounds like it was recorded in a gas station bathroom, Raida and Bushra recap their year but also tell their most embarrassing period stories. Plus, Bushra refuses to go to a hammam (Turkish bath) with Raida, and it puts their friendship at stake.
Welcome to episode 6. Hope your ears still work after this (we’re not joking).
Seriously, the audio quality is TERRIBLE
In this episode, Bushra and Raida tell two vastly different stories on love. One ends in heartbreak, while the other with a parting love letter. And while the former may have been of sincere love, the latter was probably not as dramatic as it sounds.
Welcome to episode five; sixty minutes you definitely don’t want Ammu listening to.
In this episode, Raida and Bushra talk about the number of white men on the Mindy Project and whether that's problematic for the show. Also, Raida tells the worst story about falling in love on a cruise ship, while Bushra discusses why she really only wants to marry a Bengali boy one day.
Welcome to today's episode: a whole lot of talk about nothing (and interracial relationships).
In this week's episode, Raida and Bushra call out the judgement within their own community and share their perspective on dating in Islam. Plus, Raida reveals too much about her personal life on accident, and Bushra realizes that she may have missed out on a lucrative career in the foot modeling industry.
In this episode, Bushra and Raida discuss how much their elementary/middle schools defined who they are today but also accidentally reveal the identities of just about everyone they mention. Raida talks about calling her Ammu "bro", and Bushra talks about how her Abbu wakes her up at the crack of dawn every Sunday by vacuuming her room. Welcome to part two of the introduction--sixty minutes worth of stories definitely not worth your time.
Enjoy!
Edit (1 year later): Hi, if you’re just finding out about the podcast—welcome! And yeah, the first two eps have sh!tty audio quality, so if you skip to three, we won’t be offended.
In this pilot episode, Raida and Bushra introduce themselves by recalling their uglier days, as well as the years leading up to the stupid, beautiful friendship they have now. Through violent laughter and rough audio quality (won't happen again), these two will waste your time, and you won't even regret it.