Cold Man Cast: Recent Episodes
Cold Man Cast
Hello and welcome along to the Cold Man Cast.
Michael Dale and Tom Harrison, who make up the band I am the Cold Man, just love radio games. So they decided to play some. Expect scintillating chat, cracking jingles and verging-on-the-nonsensical games such as 'Have I Got Shoes For You' and 'Who's Brine Is It Anyway'.
Cold Man Fans, we come to you on our knees begging for forgiveness. It has been aprox 2 months since the last show and we can only imagine how hard it's been getting through those lonely winters nights without our voices in your ears, providing sweet release from your sad sad lives. Events have conspired against us (Michael was arrested on trumped up littering charges, then Tom was offered a big radio job in Slovenia, which he only realised was a scam when he arrived to find the country had not existed since 1991) but now the boys are back, and light has returned to all our lives.
In this big come back episode, expect a new game of Michael's devising, the last ever episode of 'Tom Be, or Not Tom Be?', 'Keep it Topical' and a celebrity anecdote from Tom.
As always, get in touch with us on @coldmancast or email coldmancast@gmail.com.
"The wreath is on the door, the tinsel's on the tree. And there is nowhere else that I would rather be."
If you are not au fait with these wise words, then hang your head in shame, for those are the sentiments of none other than our band, I am the Cold Man. But little did you know that in those lines we were referencing this very moment: the right here, the right now. For you are about to embark on a Christmas miracle.
This episode represents the coming together of two great occasions; a dovetailling that never before has been so fortunate, and so timely. For not only is this the Cold Man Cast Christmas special - expect bells, crackers and pop tarts... - it is also the 20th episode of this now firmly-established bastion of British comedy and culture. The Cold Men are here to celebrate this momentous occasion with you (it would be weird if they weren't) so please stop roasting your chestnuts on an open fire, and start a-listening to this special episode of the podcast.
Remember to get in contact on @coldmancast or email coldmancast@gmail.com. And of course, have a Merry Christmas!
- It's a song by Paul Hardcastle, the bar area at the end of an 18 hole golf course, the average age of a US combat soldier in the Vietnam War, and now, the number of episodes the Cold Man have cast out all over the world wide web. We have not turned tail, and run from this clearly intimidating number, but we stand tall and join the ranks of those other great 19s.
This week, look forward to new feature 'Tom Be or Not Tom Be', a discussion about scarves, and some chat about Christmas shopping, which has been described as "boring". All this, and 'Keep it Topical', along with some quality chit chat. As always, you can get in touch on twitter @coldmancast or email coldmancast@gmail.com.
Welcome aboard the Cold Man bus. Today we will stopping at Chaplin Road, Copland Avenue, Ealing Road, Wembley Central Station... Oh no, hold on. That's the number 18 bus route in London. That's something completely different. We do apologise. But will offer no refunds. Take that up with the Oyster people.
If you wanted to get to Ealing Road you're going to have find another route, because this podcast will not be stopping anywhere near such a place. It was an easy mistake to make however, seeing as we have reached that famous milestone of 18 episodes. We are now old enough to drink, to vote and to buy fags and naughty magazines; what more could we want? But rest assured, instead of celebrating our 18th birthday in drunken style, we instead sat down and did a podcast for you lot. So enjoy some Keep It Topical, Record Breakers and Absolutely Fadulous. And don't worry, it's on us this time. But you can get the next round. Get in touch on twitter @coldmancast or email coldmancast@gmail.com.
Okay, so we missed last week (having missed a number of weeks in the last couple of months), so the last few episodes have clearly seen a drop in quality, so this episode is shorter than a lot of our other episodes, but get of our backs and give us a damn break guys! You just lay like a baby bird in its nest, waiting for its mother to come and vomit the next comedy podcast into its gaping maw, you entitled ungrateful bird-people. Well here's another serving for you, and I'm not going to even tell you about any of the content, because you don't deserve it, and I want you to do something for yourselves for a change!
Having said that, we do have a Christmas single coming out soon which we'd love for you to check out and maybe buy! It's called 'Christmas Dreams', by I am the Cold Man, and you can preorder it from any of the big download places (itunes etc.), in preperation for its release on Friday (25th). Once again you can also get in touch with us on twitter @coldmancast, or on email at coldmancast@gmail.com.
It is with great pleasure and relief that we arrive once more at the shores of the Cold Man Cast. Adrift at sea in the bewildering sprawl that we call life, the Cold Men bravely toss you a (mostly) weekly safety ring, in the hope that you will grasp our rubbery sides and stay afloat. Remember, this podcast-shaped buoyancy aid could at some point save your life. Without it, you would merely struggle against the wild ocean waves; flapping and flailing your arms in a desperate hope that some other podcast might come and save you from the vast depths of nothingness.
But flap away, flail away. It is only we who can offer you safety.
For it is only we who play Keep It Topical, discuss Pokemon cards in Absolutely Fadulous, and once again try to break a world record in Record Breakers. Remember you can get in contact (and quite frankly should, in order to thank us for saving you) on twitter @coldmancast, or email us on coldmancast@gmail.com.
Hey gang! We're back after a week's hiatus due to a jigsaw related misadventure, and have we got a show for you! Due to crippling guilt for leaving you, our loyal fan(s), in the lurch, we've returned with an episode that critics the world over have been describing as "a bit longer than usual."
That's right, in lieu of an increase in quality, we've opted to just pack a more things into this episode. So, in an effort to use the veil of quantity, to shroud our deep and profound lack of quality, you can expect to hear 2, yes 2, new features, as we send 'A Laugh a Minute' and 'Absolutely Fadulous' out on their maiden voyage!
You can also expect to hear another record breaking attempt, this weeks instalment of 'Keep it Topical', and much much more. Don't forget to get in touch on Twitter @coldmancast or on email coldmancast@gmail.com.
CHECK OUT THE RECORD BREAKING ATTEMPT HERE: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I_uPbI3MSuk
Question: What do these emotions and feelings have in common: Shame, regret, disappointment, a crushing sense of self-loathing, a strong lack of self-respect, the nagging and ultimately overwhelming feeling that you'll never achieve anything in this short bout of existence that we call a lifetime?
Answer: They were all felt by Tom after last week's failed attempt to beat the World Record for eating the most amount of Ferrero Rochers in a minute. But feat not. Tom, being the highly professional broadcaster that he is, has picked himself up, dusted himself down and has once more bared his sole into the microphone, for he knows the most important secret of show-business: The show must go on.
He has also passed the World Record breaking baton on to Michael, who this week will attempt to succeed where Tom once failed. Will he rise to the challenge, or will he crumble into despair, joining Tom at the bottom of the shame ravine. Find out here! Remember to get in touch on Twitter @coldmancast or email us on coldmancast@gmail.com.
CHECK OUT THE WORLD RECORD ATTEMPT HERE: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YCM5ycORTZw
Usain Bolt, Roger Bannister, Ellen MacArthur. What links these great figures? Each belongs to the pantheon of record breakers. This week, Tom seeks to join these Kings and Queens among men, in new feature 'Tom Harrison and Michael Dale: Record Breakers'.
As though that weren't enough, you can also expect talk of noisy spiders, and minor illnesses. All this, and everybody's favourite niche quiz based feature, 'Keep It Topical'. Don't forget to get in touch on twitter @coldmancast, or email us on coldmancast@gmail.com.
We're 12 episodes in now folks, you know the deal. We write something witty and over the top here, you never read it, we feel down that our talents are being wasted and everyone goes home a loser.
So here's a thought: THIS WEEK WHY DON'T YOU THINK OF YOUR OWN PODCAST DESCRIPTION and stop relying on us to come up with one. We provide the audio content within this podcast; do you expect us to find the time to write about what's in it too!? The cheek of it... Listen and find out for yourself.
We will oblige, nonetheless, to HINT at what you can find within. We play the final game of In Laws or Out Laws before it gets laid to rest, and also have another game of Keep It Topical. We introduce a new feature, which will be fully formed and ready to go next week! So join us aboard the Cold Man train, and remember, you can get in touch on twitter @coldmancast, or email us on coldmancast@gmail.com. Get your stuff in!
Hello fans! It's pretty late so we'll make this short. Contrary to the vicious rumour going round, that we had been hauled off the internet for crimes against comedy and were now seeking asylum in Belize while fighting extradition back to the UK, the actual reason there was no show last week was that we couldn't be bothered.
But we're back now with a bang! This week we talk keys, law, Stranger Things, and 90's skater fashion, along with a healthy dose of the new and improved Keep It Topical. Drop us a message on twitter @coldmancast or email coldmancast@gmail.com.
I'm thinking of a number. It's twice the size of 5, is followed by 11 and it forms the basis of the decimal numeral system ('by far the most common system of denoting numbers in both spoken and written language', according to Wikipedia). What number could it be?
Oh, that's right, it's our good friend 10! The written down combination of 1 and 0! The sum of both 6 and 4! All bask in glory of 10 because the Cold Man Cast has made it to this most holy of numbers, and boy do we want to celebrate it! Grab your party hat, invite your friends over and party with us like there's no tomorrow!
In this special decagon shaped episode we play the usual features Dale or No Dale and Keep It Topical, whilst also mulling over our usage of the word 'yes'. Get in touch via all the usual channels: on twitter @coldmancast or email coldmancast@gmail.com. Here's to reaching 20!
September brings with it darker nights, milder days and the chance of rain. The sun, our great beacon of both heat and joy, bids its farewell and retreats for yet another few months of dismal cold and darkness. Life, in short, becomes sad.
But fear not ye fare human, for the Cold Man Cast is here to save the day/month! The Cold Men are immune from the side effects of the changing of the seasons (they remain cold throughout the year), and bring you heart-warming, better-than-average content whatever the weather! So don your rain jacket, iron that creased jumper and get on board the fun train! Next stop podcast land!
Expect usual features Dale or No Dale and Keep It Topical, and also the welcome return of Facebook News Story of the Week (or FBNSOTW, as its more commonly known). Remember you can get in touch with us via email at coldmancast@gmail.com or on twitter @coldmancast. Hurrah!
"Hello is that a taxi rank? Could I please order a cab to town? Because the boys are back (in town)..."
Yes that's right! The boys, or at least Tom and Michael, are back in town. Though their careful foreplanning meant that you lucky people didn't miss out last week, the Cold Men are now back in the rightful place: town. Having touched down from Edinburgh and Copenhagen you'd expect them to have tales of their travels. But don't expect too much, unless you're a fan of paintings of cross-eyed dogs...
Expect an ever-present classic in the form of Keep It Topical, and also a new feature created in the mind of Tom Harrison (maybe it should have stayed there, you be the judge). Get in touch via twitter @Coldmancast, or email coldmancast@gmail.com.
Calling all Cold Fans! Your favourite 2 man, games based, weekly, UK comedy Podcast is back with yet another big pile of audio fun. Rio 2016 Olympic James has an international feel this week, as a scheduling mishap means it has to be recorded down the phone with Tom in Copenhagen, and Michael in Edinburgh. So if you're a fan of poor audio quality and Danish people shouting in the background then this is the show for you! We also have an in depth discussion of the Wetland Centres marketing strategies.
There's all this along with the return of features such as Keep It Topical, and The Runaway Success that is Dale or No Dale. Don't forget to get in touch with us on twitter @coldmancast, or drop us an email at coldmancast@gmail.com. Keep it pro!
Good news everyone! Cold Man Cast is pregnant with a new feature! It's been a long hard week (for that is the gestation period of a feature) but we invite you to witness the birth with your very own ears right here, right now. What will we call this new baby feature, and how heavy will it be? Will it have Tom or Michael's eyes? Find out within.
We also have everyone's favourite feature Keep It Topical, as well as a 2016 Olympic James update. Remember you can get in touch with the Cast via twitter @coldmancast, or drop us an email at coldmancast@gmail.com. Enjoy, and stay safe out there.
Come one and come all to the great cold man cast. Our larks are most jovial, our appeal is vast. In this show there's much fun for me and for you, as we delve in to Tom's ideal BBQ. You'll hear Michael gag on a brine that's a shocker, and learn all the rules of Tom's Game Slobberknocker. The Rio Olympics are subbed in for shoes, and today's Keep It Topical pits monks against dudes. There's this and much more so please drop us a tweet, an email or even a fax would be sweet! So hoist up the sails to the top of the mast, and climb up aboard the good ship Cold Man Cast!
@coldmancast coldmancast@gmail.com
This week the boys buy advance off-peak tickets and board the funny bus, making frequent chat stops at Pokemon Go, Marmite and the Holy Island of Lindisfarne. Why not top up your Oyster (or buy a regular ticket if your town/city doesn't use the Oyster system) and climb aboard the comedy bus with them.
Expect usual features Have I Got Shoes For You and Keep It Topical, as well as the second edition of Getting To Know You. Remember you can get in touch with the Cold Man via twitter @coldmancast, or drop us an email at coldmancast@gmail.com. Enjoy, and stay safe out there.
With temperatures reaching almost record highs this week, it seems wholly appropriate, nay almost totally necessary, to cool down with the Cold Man. Michael and Tom are on hand to sit you down, lightly dab a cold flannel on your sweaty brow and whisper sweet nothings into your hot ears. So take a seat, grab a flannel and get ready for the good times.
This week sees the introduction of two new features (and two new smoky jazz-inflected jingles) as well as the classic 'Keep It Topical'. Find the Cold Man on Twitter @coldmancast or email coldmancast@gmail.com. Enjoy, and stay safe out there.
"Guess who just got back today, them wild eyed boys that been away (for a week)", as the song goes. That's right people, Michael and Tom are back in town, with another injection of fun to jab sharply into the arm of your monotonous lives. This week the boys play the usual features - 'Have I Got Shoes For You', 'Facebook News Story of the Week' and 'Keep It Topical' - and also try some snuff, for some reason. Enjoy, and stay safe out there.
Michael Dale and Tom Harrison, of the band I am the Cold Man, are here with a brand new podcast. They just love radio games, so decided to play some. In this week's episode we hear the debut of 'Facebook News Story of the Week' and 'Keep it Topical' as well as the old favourite 'Have I Got Shoes For You', which makes a welcome return to our lives. The boys also do a gig review and Tom reveals how he spends his time post-concert. Enjoy.