Farm Wisdom: Recent Episodes
Farmer Gray
Farmer Gray recounts the haunting of Rumson Carp by his uncle Cantrell, and then, just in time for the Halloween season, reviews "The Night House," a ghost story. Or is it?
Farmer Gray relates the adventures of Lionel Peabody, old and losing his sight, but still able to stir up trouble. The same could be said of the protagonist of "Don't Breathe 2," whose house seems to be a magnet for thieves and villains.
Farmer Gray catches his pigs in flagrante delicto and then reviews the film "Nine Days," in which a celestial middle manager decides who gets born.
Farmer Gray reviews “The Suicide Squad,” which is an adequate title for a movie and a poor name for your bunk at summer camp.
Farmer Gray reviews the film "The Green Knight," an Arthurian tale that, the title notwithstanding, does not concern a knight who recycles.
Farmer Gray reviews the M. Night Shyamalan film “Old,” about a beach where you live a year every half hour. Which is kind of what happens when you watch an M. Night Shyamalan movie.
Farmer Gray reviews the Nicholas Cage movie “Pig,” all about a backwoods gourmand who travels to the big city to find his stolen pig. It’s a film Disney might have made, had he been terribly, terribly strung out.
Farmer Gray reviews Marvel’s “Black Widow,” wherein Scarlett Johansson and a bunch of other ladies beat up on each other.
Farmer Gray reviews the film “The Boss Baby: Family Business” and expounds on a brotherly bond that may be tighter than he thinks. “Down Venus, Up Mars!”
Farmer Gray gets in gear to review “F9: The Fast Saga,” the latest in a movie franchise with more chapters than Leviticus. He also relates his own youthful “fast and furious” misadventure and how it kept him out of the army.
Farmer Gray critiques the demonic doings in "The Conjuring 3: The Devil Made Me Do It" and wonders why his own encounter with satanic possession didn't rate a Hollywood movie.
Farmer Gray reviews the slasher film "Spiral: From the Book of Saw," starring that cut-up Chris Rock. Get it? Cut-up? He's a comedian starring in a slasher movie, see, so the term has a double meaning. And that's just a taste of the sophisticated humor you'll enjoy (for free!) if you'll only just listen to this episode.
Farmer Gray relates the connection between Easter Island and Jason Statham and then reviews the action star's new movie "Wrath of Man." Will Mr. Statham's glower intimidate even our brave host?
As our host relates, his friend Farmer Red learned the hazards of controlled substances one night at Billy Deer's Tavern. Then he reviews the film "Four Good Days," a cautionary tale of drug addiction.
Farmer Gray reviews the arm-ripping, head-squashing action of the latest "Mortal Combat" movie, a film bloodier than a pig caught in a combine.
Farmer Gray reviews a film that has a special place in his heart, 'cause it's all about farming. That's right, the Oscar-winning picture "Minari."
Farmer Gray relates the story of a battle between two real-life behemoths and then marvels at the insane fever dream that is "Godzilla vs. Kong."
Farmer Gray reviews the film "Nobody," in which Bob Odenkirk's humdrum existence hides a dark secret. "A film called 'Nobody' starring somebody I never heard of," muses Farmer Gray. "Is that what the physicists call a zero point field?"
Farmer Gray reviews the new Disney movie "Raya and the Last Dragon," heartbroken that Raya lacks a man, but rejoicing that, according to the title, the dragon infestation is over.
Farmer Gray gets carried away with "The Courier," starring Benedict Cumberbatch. It's the true story of a British businessman who helped steal Soviet nuclear intelligence.
Farmer Gray reviews "The Father," with Anthony Hopkins and Olivia Colman. Because if there's one thing the world needs right now, it's a super-depressing movie about senile dementia.
Farmer Gray gets animated over the big-screen version of "Tom and Jerry." Did Hollywood do justice to the beloved cartoon?
Bumfuzzled by the wanderlust, Farmer Gray reviews "Nomadland," starring Frances McDormand.
Farmer Gray reviews "The World to Come," a film about 19th-century farmers and the wives who apparently couldn't stand them. By the way, Farmer Gray will be abandoning this podcast for a new one called "Farmer Gray's Film Reviews." Check it out on Apple, Spotify, or Google Podcasts!
Farmer Gray puts aside his disdain for witchcraft by reviewing "WandaVision," streaming on Disney+. Will the devil's handmaidens hold him in their thrall?
Farmer Gray reviews the Denzel Washington movie "The Little Things," about the hunt for a serial killer. What sets this film apart from the plethora of similarly themed stories out there? How about an ending that makes no sense unless you Google it on your way home from the theater?
Farmer Gray reviews Liam Neeson's new film, "The Marksman." Is it a hit or a miss? Does Neeson score a bull's-eye? Is this movie on target? Can I use more worn-out metaphors? The answer to at least one of these questions is "yes."
Farmer Gray endures three episodes of the sitcom "Call Me Kat" and even watches the original British version of the series. You are welcome.
Farmer Gray reviews "Wonder Woman 1984" and finds that it's a film he "wouldn't not recommend," or something like that.
Farmer Gray reviews "News of the World," a Western starring Tom Hanks as a man who finds a child raised by the Indians and resolves to fetch her back home.
Watch out for whiplash, 'cause Farmer Gray's changed the format of his show. From here on in, rather than expounding on his hometown of Trouveau, Miss., he'll be reviewing films and TV shows. This week the 70-year-old Mid-Southerner discusses "Promising Young Woman," in which Carey Mulligan shares the screen with a parade of lecherous fellas.
When Farmer Gray gets the COVID-19 vaccine, he experiences a "liberal" dose of side effects. And what's Kamala Harris doing in his sorghum field?
On the trail of Wampus cats and Snallygasters, two intrepid cryptozoologists invite Farmer Gray to New Orleans for an interview and reveal why searching for legendary creatures is the cat's pajamas.
Farmer Gray's young friend Jamie has written a psychological profile of the world's first desperate housewife, Betty Rubble. Just what devastating secrets are concealed behind the bland smile of that Bedrock bride?
While plowing the sorghum field, Farmer Gray's tractor hits a mastodon tusk. Will evidence of prehistoric life square with his literal interpretation of Scripture? Uh ... no, probably not.
On a snowy winter evening, Farmer Gray regales us with a ghost story involving a fella named Don who's about to give up his job to a guy named Joe, and the visit they receive from a familiar spirit in a stovepipe hat.
When the town braggart impugns the honor of Farmer Gray's wife Elspeth, our hero has no recourse but to challenge him to single combat.
Fearing that children's television has an unwholesome impact on today's tots, Farmer Gray hosts his own public access kiddie show with Bible riddles, toys, harsh discipline, and a scary, scary clown.
When Farmer Gray collaborates with his old friend Davis McClyde on an inspirational play about agricultural, Davis veers into territory best left to New York dramatists.
When a bully tries to get the better of a young Farmer Gray and his friends at a Saturday morning picture show, they aim to scare the pants off their nemesis. As it turns out, disguising farmhand Gunner Balloo as Frankenstein's monster works way better than they anticipated.
When Farmer Gray leads a children's reading circle at First Baptist, he discovers that death and decrepitude are the meat and potatoes of today's storybooks. Will he find a way to cheer up his traumatized tots?
Afraid the Supreme Court is going to strike down Obamacare? Fear not, says Farmer Gray, 'cause there are plenty of down-home country remedies to keep you in the pink of health.
Farmer Gray relates the true story behind the presidential election and how Donald Trump found himself a few votes short of a second term.
For Farmer Gray's friend Gully, life begins at conception, which leads to a very unusual relationship with his progeny, Collier.
To better please his audience, Farmer Gray takes a writing class over at Zayre County Community Center. There he recites a tender ode to his wife, Elspeth, but it's his friend Davis McClyde who becomes teacher's pet.
When a Silver Alert goes out for a runaway senior citizen, Farmer Gray springs into action. But his encounter with elderly Edgar, doing 90 in his red muscle car, puts him on a collision course for trouble.
Farmer Gray and his pals help lonely Farmer Beau find companionship, thanks to the dating site FarmersOnly.
You've all heard how Donald Trump contracted the coronavirus and was airlifted to Walter Reed? Well, Farmer Gray lets you in on the true story of why our president visited the hospital.
Is expectant mama Lorraine Lowry carrying a boy or a girl? Farmer Gray relates how a gender-reveal party thrown by husband Preston nearly led to divorce.
Old Mason Cook gets his cage rattled when a young couple move in downstairs. Will the traditional ways prevail on Cedar Street, or will Mason be forced to join the year 2020? Farmer Gray'll tell you.
President Trump and Joe Biden travel to humble Trouveau, Miss, for the campaign season's first presidential debate. But can Biden possibly hold his own against a master debater like Donald Trump?
When Debbie Ellen Waites vanishes from town, Farmer Gray turns detective to solve her disappearance. Why does everyone think she's gone to Tupelo, and what was in that mysterious suitcase?
When Farmer Gray is invited to the showing of a long-lost Three Stooges short, he soon discovers that these antics by Moe, Larry, and Curly should have stayed lost.
That former assistant clerk at the seed co-op, his life's been on an awful downward spiral. But now that he's been released from prison, he's getting a hand up from none other than Farmer Gray.
Donald and Melania Trump, out for a spin in their red Mustang, uncover a plot by the evil Joe Biden to falsify November's mail-in votes. Will the President of the United States take bold action to ensure that every Republican is assured of his or her God-given right to suffrage?
When crop circles appear in his sorghum field, Farmer Gray starts itching for a close encounter. Will this lead to an intergalactic incident?
By the time the theater director at Zayre County's Episcopal church finishes staging a production of "Annie," the once cheery show is all but unrecognizable.
Wise old Farmer Gray plugs a fine American product, castor oil. Try NOT buying a bottle once you've heard his finely honed portrays of father and obstinate son. Then our friend relates how he tried to coax his beloved wife Elspeth from the storm cellar, where she hides from the North Korean missiles she believes are aimed directly at Gray Farm.
When young Ted Baskin brings his East Coast bride back to Trouveau, Farmer Gray regales her with his homespun wisdom.
A'huntin' in the piney woods, old Farmer Gray comes across the legendary Bigfoot. But far from posing a threat, Sasquatch proves to be a right friendly camping companion and a darned good listener.
When Farmer Gray and his good friend Davis McClyde come across a swimming hole on a sweltering day, they do what any manly men would. They go skinny dipping.
Farmer Gray implores friends not to spring surprises when sharing wedding photos. Then he relates an encounter with a genie from a bottle, whose magic pales before the richness of Mississippi farm life.
In a blast from the past, the populace of Trouveau, Miss, uses country wiles to cure beatnik Murgatroyd Saint Sunshine of his pot addiction. Then old Farmer Gray recounts the night a bat challenged his useless cat Stalin to a turf war.
Farmer Gray hearkens back to his high school days, when Lester Gooseberry, the least popular boy in school, opened his heart to the prettiest girl on campus. Then he relates the story behind his adoption "Stalin," a peevish and contrary cat who isn't good for much.
Farmer Gray explains why it's fair that women earn only 80 percent of what men do and then relates the story of a bank robber who should've kept up with the news.
Farmer Gray muses on ugly babies, men vs. Roe vs. Wade, and an incident pregnant with embarrassment.
Haughty Ms. Libby Rall challenges humble, devout Sarah Palin to a camping contest in the Alaskan woods. Can you guess who bests who?
Wise old Farmer Gray hawks a product that should greatly benefit upwards of 0.0001 percent of the American public, then throws his hat in the ring for first selectman of Trouveau, Mississippi.
Farmer Gray relates how Savannah Lee, the newest member of Trouveau First Baptist, was discovered dancing the hootchie koo at a Memphis strip joint. That was bad enough, but when "Take Your Child to Work Day" came along, the young woman had to think fast to protect her 5-year-old son from the truth.
At a visit to the circus, Farmer Gray discovers that the old freak show ain't what it used to be. He also cooks up a plan to turn his farm into a summer camp: Farmer Gray's Funtime Freehold.
Farmer Gray finds that the postal clerk is still dying her hair all kinds of wild colors and hatches a plan to cure her compulsion. Then he muses on the meaning of a rainbow bumper sticker.
Farmer Gray babysits friend Hank's 5-year-old daughter Ambrosia and finds the little girl to be a dab hand at farming.
Wise old Farmer Gray reveals the secret to battling coronavirus by relating the tale of bully Buster Claw, and how he was vanquished by the people of Trouveau, Miss.
Old Farmer Gray runs into a round-headed drunk named Charlie at the local tavern and hears his sad story of thwarted childhood dreams. Then Farmer Gray rants against unfair anti-tobacco ads (having just planted 200 acres of the crop).
Farmer Gray encounters strange hair at the post office and is nominated to the Supreme Court of the United States.
Farmer Gray learns just what lengths his poker buddy Davis McClyde would go to to save the world from aliens and invents a device to discourage carelessness in pregnant ladies.
Old Farmer Gray reads another passage from his screenplay, "The Misadventures of Libby Rall." This time Libby tries to foil Donald Trump's immigration policies with the help of a seductive South American beauty.
A local talent show nearly foments racial disharmony until Farmer Gray steps in to set the record straight.
Farmer Gray and his buddies teach that recalcitrant assistant clerk at the seed co-op a lesson in stolen valor. Then his visit to the clerk's new "home" assures the young man an active social life.
After finding that the assistant clerk at the seed co-op dissembled with regard to jettisoning his gewgaws, Farmer Gray employs harsh measures to teach the fella' a lesson. Then he safeguards American democracy by protesting a new Chinese restaurant.
Farmer Gray teaches an assistant clerk at the seed co-op not to bestrew his desk with toys, tells listeners what Donald Trump really said on that fateful call to Ukraine, and proposes that American tourists to foreign countries be required to take a "return-to-citizenship" exam before being allowed back in the US.
Farmer Gray relates how Donald Trump took Greta Thunberg to the movies and the two became fast friends.
Farmer Gray muses on what life would have been like had he been a slaveowner, then helps a youngster through his first haircut and berates a friend for foreign-car ownership.
Farmer Gray looks for someone to remove an embarrassing splinter, bonds with his farmhand Juan Pedro's son, and rails against the casting of June Lockhart on "Petticoat Junction."
Wise old farmer gray adapts to the ministrations of a female barber and recalls how a Jewish visitor encountered hometown hospitality.
Farmer Gray addresses the danger that clementines pose to our youth and recounts the very Republican tale of Manolo, the little boy from Guatemala.
Farmer Gray describes his days of sandlot football, when heroic young folk took a beating and came back for more.
Wise old Farmer Gray details a farm-based cure for transgenderism, tackles a tricky question at Zayre County Baptist Church, and gets in on the unboxing craze.
Wise old Farmer Gray narrates his screenplay detailing the comical adventures of Ms. Libby Rall, as she fruitlessly tries to undermine Donald Trump, and then rails against table service at McDonald's.
Farmer Gray catches the acting bug, explains why women have no need for a restroom, and discusses the president's zero tolerance immigration policy.
Wise old Farmer Gray introduces you to the town of Trouveau, Miss; proves that President Donald J. Trump is not in the pocket of the Russians; and recalls courting his beloved wife Elspeth.
Wise old Farmer Gray recalls his own brush with transgenderism the night he and a buddy dressed up for a "ladies only" pie feast.
Wise old Farmer Gray bemoans a lack of decorum in Sunday church and has a bone to pick with the Disney Channel.