Help a Loved One in Distress: Recent Episodes

Peter Malinoski and Gerry Crete

Have you ever wondered what to do when confronted with a loved one in psychological distress? Dr. Peter Malinoski and Dr. Gerry Crete, co-founders of Souls and Hearts, have put together a free course to help you help others.

In this course, you’ll learn a step-by-step process of providing psychological first aid to those in need. You’ll not only learn the specific things you should do, but also see those suggestions fleshed out through real-life examples and role-plays. Near the end of the course, you’ll have the opportunity to practice your responses in different scenarios.

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It’s tempting to try to analyze the problem, change bad feelings or just fix things for a loved one in distress. In this module, Dr. Peter Malinoski and Dr. Gerry Crete encourage you to slow down, stay calm, and simply focus on being with your distressed loved one instead of shifting to “doing” mode. By holding the present moment and protecting the space to allow others to feel and share what they are experiencing in a non-judgmental, humble and honest way, you’ll be providing a loving space for your family member or friend. 

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Although many people want a checklist of things to do so they can jump right in to help, Dr. Peter Malinoski and Dr. Gerry Crete explain why you have to start with yourself. Although this module is not about becoming perfect first, it is about increasing the awareness of what you need to do to prepare yourself to be an instrument of God. It encourages you to embrace some basic self-care principles as well as to be introspective about why you react to distressing situations in the way that you do. Bringing some of these things to light in your own mind will better prepare you to help others.

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It's usually easy to spot signs of distress in a family member or friend. You may notice things like low energy, excessive crying, or even an increase in physical symptoms like muscle cramps. After you realize someone you love needs help, Dr. Gerry and Dr. Peter suggest you check yourself first. Are there things from you past that may lead you to react in a certain way? Before entering into a discussion, try to remember that God loves both of you in that moment and is present to help. 

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Dr. Peter Malinoski and Dr. Gerry Crete, co-founders of Souls and Hearts, talk about what the overall course is designed to do as well as what it’s not designed to do. You’ll also get a birds’ eye view of what will be coming up in future modules of the course, which includes self-care, general principles, situation assessment, listening and reflecting, effective affirmation, how to make a plan, what to say, and things to avoid. Finally, you’ll get to actually practice through role-playing exercises to help you prepare and build confidence.