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🌟 While we no longer record the Q&A discussions during our Leadership Strategy Sessions, we continue to record the opening teaching. Enjoy a special preview of what we share about resetting your team’s rhythm for the season ahead. If you want to see the complete teaching and take part in upcoming sessions, consider upgrading to join us live next month.

August is a tale of two months. The first half feels like summer, but at some point in the month (maybe it already has), your end-of-year mode kicks in. You’re already three to six months ahead in your head, calculating what has to happen before December. Your team is going to need some time to catch up.

Recognize your team is still in gear-shifting mode and set your expectations for your team and yourself accordingly. Use August as a primer so everyone can ease into the faster pace that September will inevitably bring.

And as that pace picks up, so will the weight of what’s on your plate. This month’s Q&A brought up a few such challenges, including:

• Redirecting decisions and knowledge during a leadership transition, without waiting for a single handover meeting to cover it all

• Naming a dip in team readiness after a departure as normal, not a personal failing

• Framing covering work as a temporary hold from the start, so reintegration feels like a handoff instead of a negotiation

• Auditing what’s actually needed before recalibrating a role after someone returns from extended leave

• Weighing loyalty to one against team and organizational responsibility

• Building functional trust with a neurodivergent teammate without abandoning team-wide expectations

Our next Leadership Strategy Session will be on Wednesday, September 9, 2026, at 11:00 a.m. PDT.

Premium subscribers can watch the full opening teaching and access all related resources shared during the call. 👇🏽

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We know teams serve as the cornerstone of any successful organization. Yet all too often, the relational and emotional aspects of teamwork end up sidelined in favor of performance metrics alone — which ironically doesn’t always improve team performance.

Recently, I was invited to share insights on this on the ATD Talent Development Leader podcast (sponsored by Randstad Risesmart) where I discussed the team habits approach to the nexus of performance and belonging.

This was a conversation about what really matters to and on a team — why trust, belonging, and well-being aren’t just nice-to-haves but are the essentials we need to have productivity and impact.

What we see again and again is strong interpersonal bonds as the defining trait of high-performing teams. When there’s psychological safety, and people feel connected and understood, teams come alive. On the flip side, the absence of these bonds can be just as damaging as their presence is powerful. Without trust and open communication, even the most skilled teams struggle to make progress.

Throughout the conversation, I share practical strategies for embedding the eight essential team habits — guiding principles that any leader or team member can put into action.

If you’re looking to build a culture grounded in trust and purpose, I hope you’ll find this episode helpful — as we continue the ongoing work of reinstating the human side of teamwork at the center of team performance.

Topics We Explored

• Why work is fundamentally about relationships, not just outputs

• The evidence for high-performing teams being characterized by strong interpersonal bonds

• How belonging and trust are essential for maintaining healthy team relationships and driving performance

• Ways emotional and social components can be integrated into team decision-making, rather than just rational/strategic factors

• Why large-scale change initiatives often fail due to top-down approaches that lack buy-in — and democratic, bottom-up change is more effective

• That building an environment of trust and articulating a clear vision are critical leadership responsibilities

• The reasons many individual contributors end up feeling disempowered and disconnected from improving team dynamics

• Practical strategies for enhancing specific team habits that can lead to significant performance improvements

If Productive Flourishing adds value to your inbox, consider upgrading to a paid or pro subscription to access to the full archive, monthly community coaching calls, and more.

Episode Timestamps

[00:00] Introduction to the ATD podcast.

[01:24] Exploring the fundamental importance of relationships, not just outputs, in high-performing teams. Belonging and trust as essential glue for healthy team dynamics and performance.

[06:02] Why there’s a need to integrate emotional and social components, not just rational/strategic factors, into team decision-making. Avoiding the mistake of trying to extract these more human elements.

[10:07] We discuss the high failure rates of top-down, under-resourced change initiatives, and I explain why a democratic, bottom-up change management that addresses team pain points and creates a sense of urgency works better.

[16:43] Employee disengagement is a major challenge, which can best be addressed by making work more personal, relational, and empowering team members to improve their own circumstances.

[19:32] Overview of the 8 key team habits (belonging, decision-making, goal-setting, planning, communication, collaboration, meetings, core habits) as a scorecard for high-performance teams.

[28:13] Specific examples of enhancing team habits around meetings, such as reducing unnecessary updates and clarifying commitments for information-sharing.

[34:54] Recognition that many individual contributors feel disempowered and disconnected from improving team dynamics.

[35:47] Insights from Rutger Bregman's "Humankind" debunking myths about human nature, and how it relates to the need to emphasize relational elements in team habits.

[41:44] Upcoming project focused on the importance of trust and vision in leadership, as key questions teams are always asking.

[43:09] Invitation for listeners to connect.

[43:37] Conclusion and gratitude for the insightful conversation.

This is a public episode. If you’d like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.productiveflourishing.com/subscribe

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In this special anniversary episode, Charlie Gilkey and Maghan Haggerty reflect on the five-year milestone of Start Finishing, diving deep into its impact on their lives, the lives of their community, and Productive Flourishing’s evolution over the past 17 years. They explore how doing your best work transforms you as an individual and creates ripple effects for leaders and their entire teams.

Topics We Explored:

• The deeper paradox of productivity: Why do we often end up putting off the things we really want to do in life to some later date? (When that means we may not ever start, let alone finish, those projects.)

• The origins of Start Finishing as a book, and the driving force behind it, namely to argue for doing the work that matters and treating one’s "best work" as priority — and what that changes in how we approach meaningful projects.

• All the ways in which personal and team success are interconnected, and how Charlie’s third book Team Habits built on the foundations of Start Finishing.

• The multitude of “best work” stories we’ve heard from people around the world who, as a result of finding Start Finishing, have finished the projects that matter.

• Embracing life and work simultaneously by living and working with purpose, and finding joy in the process.

• Charlie's vision for the future of "Productive Flourishing", inviting people to embrace the "get to" mindset (“getting to” do the work we’ve dreamed of doing.)

Links and Resources Mentioned in This Episode:

CHARLIE’S BOOKS

• Start Finishing: How to Go From Idea to Done

• The Start Finishing Field Guide

• Team Habits: How Small Actions Lead to Extraordinary Results

• The Small Business Life Cycle

BLOG POSTS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE

• Yet Another Blog on Time Management?!

• Stand Tall, Creative Giants

• The Air Sandwich: Why Your Big Picture and Day-to-Day Reality Don’t Link Up

• A Frog a Day Keeps Your Anchors Aweigh

• Success Often Comes When You're Not Searching for It

OTHER RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE

• Finite and Infinite Gamesby James P Carse

• Give to Growby Mo Bunnell (Episode 254)

• Stumbling on Happiness by Daniel Gilbert

• PF Productivity Coaching

If this podcast episode — and PF in your inbox in general — benefit you, consider how much you might flourish with access to the full archive of writing, monthly coaching calls & e-courses with a paid subscription.

Thanks for Listening!

We’d love to hear your stories of what you’ve started and finished thanks to Start Finishing. Share your best work moments with us!

Subscribe to the Productive Flourishing Podcast on Apple Podcasts or your favorite platform so you never miss an episode. Plus, if this episode resonated with you, leave a review to help others find the show.

Episode Timestamps

[0:00] Re-introduction to the podcast and the 5-year anniversary of Start Finishing.

[2:15] Maghan discusses her personal journey with "Productive Flourishing" and the impact of Start Finishing on her life, work, and career.

[7:48] Charlie shares the origins of Start Finishing and how it connects to Productive Flourishing’s broader mission.

[15:30] The importance of “best work” and why focusing on it and keeping it a priority leads to our thriving.

[20:58] The transition from Start Finishing to Team Habits and how personal and team success intertwine.

[32:46] Further reflection on how Productive Flourishing has evolved over 17 years and what’s next.

[40:30] Maghan shares some Start Finishing reader stories about the power of finishing our most meaningful projects.

[47:20] Charlie and Maghan dive into ideas about thriving in both work and life, by following a sense of purpose in both.

Coming Soon: Limited, Signed Start Finishing

To celebrate the 5th anniversary, Charlie’s gone into the vault and found a small number of first edition hardcovers of Start Finishing he’ll sign (and personalize, with whatever message you’d like) and make available for sale.

If you’re interested in getting your own hands on this piece of PF history, or giving a one-of-a-kind gift to that person you know could benefit from Start Finishing, hit the button to sign up, and you’ll be the first to know when we have these available for sale.

This is a public episode. If you’d like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.productiveflourishing.com/subscribe

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Topics We Explored:

• Mo Bunnell’s new book Give to Grow and why it makes sense to focus on relationships and a giving mindset as the foundation for long-term business success.

• How to define business development and distinguish it from pure sales, as well as the importance of strategic helpfulness in developing a business or career.

• The logic behind providing value upfront through small projects or advice to build trust and increase the likelihood of future business and engagement.

• Strategies for making effective recommendations and managing client expectations, including the use of social proof and escalating commitments.

Links and Resources Mentioned in This Episode:

• Mo Bunnell: Website | Podcast

• Give to Grow Supplemental Materials: Downloadable resources, including the Give to Grow Team Launch Guide, top lead generation methods worksheet, meeting prep questions, research citations, and an exclusive secret chapter.

• Find Your Business Flow: PF’s new cohort program to help entrepreneurs focus on (among other things) growth — building relationships, scaling your business, and winning the work that matters.

Perspectives like those in this episode can help you grow your business. By upgrading to a paid subscription, you gain access to exclusive content, monthly coaching calls & e-courses.

About Mo Bunnell:

Mo Bunnell helps complex organizations grow by scaling business development skills and creating a growth-oriented culture. He’s the founder of Bunnell Idea Group (BIG) and the author of The Snowball System. BIG has trained tens of thousands of professionals at hundreds of organizations. Mo lives in Atlanta, Georgia.

Thanks for Listening!

Subscribe to Productive Flourishing on Apple Podcasts to get all the latest episodes delivered straight to your preferred mobile device. This is the perfect option for listening to the show in the car, on the subway, or while you’re working out. Plus, you won’t have to fuss with figuring out how you’re going to listen.

Episode Timestamps

[0:01:46] Charlie Gilkey introduces Mo Bunnell and discusses why he's excited about the Give to Grow book.

[0:05:02] Discussion of the broader definition of business development and how it differs from sales.

[0:07:34] Mo Bunnell explains the importance of balancing altruistic and economic success in business.

[0:11:41] Importance of selling the problem and the solution, not just the expertise.

[0:13:26] Discussion of the differences between the skills needed for "doing the work" versus "winning the work".

[0:18:30] Explanation of the concept of "certainty" versus "possibility" in business development.

[0:22:05] Explanation of the "give to grow" strategy and providing value upfront to build trust.

[0:26:52] Discussion of how to make effective recommendations and manage client expectations.

[0:31:14] Advice on naming programs and offerings to focus on outcomes, not just processes.

[0:35:47] Importance of providing options and allowing clients to choose.

[0:41:44] Addressing the challenge of transitioning from free to paid content.

[0:47:59] Practical tips for committing to and testing new business development strategies.

[0:52:54] Discussion of the importance of casting possibility and helping clients see their best version.

[1:06:51] Final thoughts on the emotion and inspiration of winning the work.

This is a public episode. If you’d like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.productiveflourishing.com/subscribe

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Note to the reader: Team Habits, my most recent book, was released one year ago this week. You might also be aware of Productive Flourishing’s sister publication, Better Team Habits, a spin-off of the book.

We’ve had incredible moments over on BTH in the past year. For those not subscribed to both publications I’d like to celebrate the book’s anniversary by sharing with you a singular podcast episode I sat down to do with my friend Kate Tyson on “fixing the plane while we fly it.” I think it will prove fruitful for PF readers too — for your current or future teams.

— Charlie

Many of us would likely agree on the fact that the dominant, central power structures that make up our system need some reform. That goes for institutions large and small, whether we’re talking about a particular startup company or the global economy.

But what is change supposed to look like, and how does it come about?

If I could offer one of the basic tenets from Team Habits, it’s that we start the change process by first shifting the way we relate to each other — in our teams and at work.

This episode originally aired on Kate Tyson’s podcast Boss Talks: Whiskey Fridays, in which she and I dive into how cultural change is a long-term play, and why better team habits are a critical component of the process.

Topics We Explored

• The challenges of leading and effecting change in businesses, particularly in the context of social and economic change, and the importance of engaging with the 'messy middle'.

• Looking for 'subversive simplicity' in our lives, business, and management decisions — which often challenges conventional wisdom on growth and productivity.

• The disconnect between workplace culture and the caretaking reality at home of many team members.

• How to address these and other issues of power and balance in the workplace we’ll need as a whole a more collaborative approach to decision-making and team bonding

• Leading and forming teams is never easy.

• Why by acknowledging issues and addressing power dynamics head-on, we have a chance to avoid conflicts or deal with them effectively.

• How prioritizing relationship-building with our teammates ultimately creates change and trust

This episode touches on many topics I explore at length in my book, Team Habits: How Small Actions Lead to Extraordinary Results.

If Productive Flourishing adds value to your inbox, consider a paid or pro subscription for access to the full archive, monthly community coaching calls, and more.

About Kate Tyson

Kate Tyson is a multi-disciplinary business owner and rebellious spirit, and the owner and director of Wanderwell, a consulting and bookkeeping practice that grows thriving small businesses, while investigating new models for being in business. Wanderwell integrates financial expertise with an empathic, vision-forward approach, and leads with the belief that businesses can help create a more just world that centers people, community, and the environment.

Episode Timestamps

[0:00] Leadership, power sharing, and social change. What does it take to shift from a single-leader model to a democratic leadership approach? Many companies and leaders struggle with the challenge of moving towards shared leadership without losing direction. Businesses can be platforms for social and economic change, and as a result, grapple with the complexities of dismantling oppressive structures within capitalist frameworks. How do we foster collaboration and ensure respect within the workplace while striving for excellence?

[5:28] Cultural norms in the workplace.The workplace can be a site of systems change and social justice, given the growth of decentralized micro-capitalist businesses in the 2000s. Leaders need to prioritize team well-being to avoid perpetuating negative aspects of the dominant culture. Charlie shares how to recognize and dismantle harmful cultural norms — and how leaders can become aware of and shift away from perpetuating negative cultural patterns through reflection and awareness.

[11:58] Burnout & Team Dynamics.Charlie explains how burnout and revolving doors (of employees) can be symptoms of how white supremacy and toxic hierarchy affect businesses and our experience in the workplace. Common assumptions about productivity in the workplace are often deeply flawed. Cranking tasks out faster is only one dimension of productivity. Being a leader or owner may mean challenging norms about pressure and invisible expectations (especially for emotional and social labor). We want team members to take more ownership and yet we need to share the burden — with self-care and compassion. That means looking at system issues, rather than finding individual blame.

[20:53] Decision-making and mutual care. If we want to care for the humans in our businesses we need to think about things like language. But it can’t be words alone. We might want to look at team habits about how we approach one another — do we approach situations with empathy and avoid making assumptions? If there’s a wider collective issue on the team, those are things that training and clear communication can go far in addressing, especially when creating a new team. A central idea in Team Habits is about levels of decision-making for team members, and the importance of communication and context.

[30:34] Democratizing leadership and employee ownership.Kate shares personal experience with Quaker organizations, highlighting consensus-driven decision-making and anti-authoritarianism. The discussion turns to deeper work of helping people decolonize themselves, including employee equity and ownership pathways. Open book management (OBM) is one approach to doing that.

[36:11] Power dynamics in the workplace. Salaries are one challenge that come up in disrupting traditional power dynamics (and is a topic addressed by OBM.) Transparency is one approach to disrupting the secrecy and taboo around salaries — while it’s fair to acknowledge that power dynamics in organizations are complex, involving individual and institutional power.

[39:45] Interpersonal vs. Institutional Power. Interpersonal power is a hugely important topic for teams. Charlie emphasizes the need to put more care back into work relationships between teammates to build trust and support. If one person steps on another’s toe, it can lead to mistrust and friction, but also one individual might choose institutional power as a means to solve the problem, reinforcing the paradigm and creating a triangle of intervention.

[45:08] Care vs. institutional power, and difficult conversations.Teams at some point are forced to choose between institutional power or actual care. Team members must be willing to have difficult conversations. Inconsistent communication and delegation practices bring about tension.

[51:22] Breeding respect and autonomy. Respect is crucial, for everyone on the team, but also those in leadership positions, even in anti-hierarchical organizations. Leaders need unscheduled time to think and make decisions, respecting their unique function and autonomy. Kate discusses the importance of intentionally designed structures in anarchist movements, citing the Goldilocks problem.

[58:06] Team habits, meeting and collaboration. Changing one type of team habit has ripple effects on others, like eliminating bad meetings. Relational work is not separate from business work, since often it's our relationships that are most important to us as humans.

This is a public episode. If you’d like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.productiveflourishing.com/subscribe

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Key Takeaways:

[3:24] Charlie’s background and why he decided to become an entrepreneur.

[9:16] It typically takes 18 months to 36 months just to figure out what you're doing as an entrepreneur.

[13:13] Mark talks about his career journey from going to film school to going to a corporate company at a franchise company making videos. There, he started to look at which projects he enjoyed the most and which ones had the highest profit margins that he could deliver.

[14:01] The lowest point in Mark’s business and how it changed.

[16:13] Mark’s story of using his high intelligence, talent, and energy in a way that served himself and others.

[23:47] Asking for help is one of the greatest things we could do.

[24:15] When you accept the gift of not knowing, it opens up all these possibilities.

[24:20] It’s okay that you don’t know, and you don’t have to fight that.

[31:42] What path will get your message in front of the people you want to speak to, and then once you are there, how do you build an experience better than your competitors?

[33:16] The principles of marketing and sales haven’t really changed since 2000 years ago. We’ve just gotten better at implementing those principles.

[45:28] Mark’s decision to stop running his business.

[1:04:11] Doing our best work requires us to center ourselves on our dreams and our passions.

[1:11:05] Ask yourself: what’s the smartest thing you can do next, and then, what’s the most courageous next step you can take on that project?

[1:19:38] Mark’s Challenge: Let him help you.

Mentioned:

Mark Drager: Website | Podcast

Richard Branson

Fast Company

Breakthrough Advertising

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Key Takeaways:

[2:57] Ruby and Eric discuss some of the unique delights and challenges of being part of a writing trio.

[7:45] What is the bridge between this book and Morag’s book Cultivate: The Power of Winning Relationship?

[8:05] What are the intentional choices you can make to build ally relationships?

[12:44] Ruby and Eric break down the five components of an ally mindset:

• abundance and generosity
• connection and compassion
• courage and vulnerability
• candor and debate
• action and accountability

[13:23] In order to get more allies, you have to be one yourself.

[25:43] How can we start with small ripples of joy in our own lives and have that branch out to help others?

[28:12] Are two-hour staff meetings really necessary? And if so, how do we make them more efficient and profitable for everyone involved?

[34:13] If you’ve invested in your relationship, it’s going to withstand weird moments. In the meantime, what should we do when a sideways moment occurs?

[59:54] Challenge: lean into having the hard conversations. Keeping your head down isn’t going to change a damn thing. And, check out the Ally Mindset Profile to give you some insights into what comes naturally to you, as it relates to the five practices.

Mentioned:

You, Me, We: Why We All Need a Friend at Work

Ally Mindset Profile

John Gottman

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Key Takeaways:

[6:20] We are in a media environment that is saturated with messages about how much more we could be doing.

[7:27] Charlie, Jenny, and Tara define capacity and what that means to them.

[10:51] What are some of the things that can make working in a team overwhelming?

[14:17] When our world gets too big, we tend to get disengagement and boredom.

[15:38] The difference between rigidity and rigor in goal setting.

[17:09] Why is it important to bring in conversation about rigidity versus rigor as it relates to capacity and the ambitions that so many of us have, especially for creative pursuits?

[21:55] How do you effectively and professionally communicate when you’re overcommitted?

[29:07] Just be honest about what you can and can't do.

[32:07] Yes, technically we all have the same 24 hours as Beyonce, but we have different 24 hours.

[45:34] At the heart of hustle culture is a solution to a substantially larger problem that we have in the 21st-Century economy. Charlie, Jenny, and Tara discuss how hustle and bro culture is a larger sign of a patriarchy and white male privilege.

Mentioned:

Jenny Blake

Tara McMullin

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Key Takeaways:

[3:13] Jennifer discusses finding her voice in the workplace equality movement as a professional, a member of the LGBTQ+ community, and someone who recognizes their privilege.

[5:25] Jennifer talks about carrying the LGBTQ identity as a source of challenge, and using it as a vehicle to transform her own leadership.

[12:22] When getting leaders and insiders to enact lasting change, we need to focus on DEI efforts on the moral case, just as much, if not more than, the business case.

[15:43] If you are an insider, you can push on other insiders to lead differently.

[17:40] Up to 75% of change management efforts fail, especially the top-down-led ones.

[21:01] We can find core issues that we can focus on, which will then create ripples of change. One example of this can be toxic masculinity.

[33:01] We should recognize that the differences between us are ones we should face and name, rather than sweep them under the rug.

[38:11] The journey of understanding others is challenging and may reveal things about ourselves that we never expected. It’s important to be patient, humble, and transparent about our experience. Humans don’t learn by shaming one another.

[1:01:28] Leaning on others within your community is super important, and Jennifer talks about the profoundness of an ally showing up to help speak for someone who can’t.

[1:09:49] Jennifer’s challenge: get comfortable with being uncomfortable.

[1:10:44] DEI is a laboratory for human evolution, and it challenges us at the deepest level in the not knowing.

Mentioned:

Jennifer Brown

How to Be an Inclusive Leader

DEI Deconstructed: Your No-Nonsense Guide to Doing the Work and Doing It Right, by Lily Zheng

bell hooks

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Can magic strike twice? As we learn in this episode, it most certainly can. Charlie welcomes Jadah Sellner, best-selling author, business coach, and the host of the Lead with Love podcast. Jadah shares wisdom from her own experience of going from the “green smoothie girl” to an anti-hustle and pro-sustainable leadership business coach. Jadah talks more about her #shebuilds movement, which helps founders build sustainable businesses without burnout, some tips on moving forward when you feel like you’ve outgrown your current situation, and how we can apply anti-hustle productivity in our personal and professional lives. Jadah and Charlie talk about their creative process of book writing, moving from fear to love, and how we can define our “enough” to move through the world more intentionally.

Key Takeaways:

[3:41] Jadah talks about co-founding Simple Green Smoothies with her then-business partner Jen, and the interesting journey to have the conscious uncoupling not only with a business partner but with an identity of a body of work that she built.

[5:20] Can magic strike twice? The answer is yes.

[5:58] What should you do when you feel stuck in a pattern, yet your heart and soul call you in a new direction?

[10:08] Sometimes we need separation to rebuild on our own and find our way.

[10:52] Jadah shares a few people and situations that helped her create her own skill set and tools to pull from in her current life.

[11:13] How is She Builds different from anything Jadah has done before?

[12:17] Pay attention to where your natural curiosity and interest lie.

[14:31] Jadah is an immersive creator, and she talks about giving herself the space to process and creatively cocoon while she is going through the process of creative writing and output.

[17:41] Things flow much more easily when we embrace the fact that each project brings a new creative process.

[23:15] The core message behind She Builds is that hustle culture isn’t working for women.

[32:51] Sometimes advocating for yourself also means having to push back deadlines and be honest with yourself and others that things may not happen on the exact day you plan for them to happen.

[38:55] How can we move from fear to love? Jadah breaks down her definition of “L.O.V.E.”: lead, optimize, visualize, and expand.

[41:23] In a world where your to-do list can be a bottomless mimosa, it’s important to have an intentional and practical relationship with your to-do list.

[48:47] Jadah’s growth edge now is being in a creative process with her book.

[50:43] Jadah’s challenge: define your “enough” number. It is personal for everyone and can help move you out of hustle culture.

Mentioned in this episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing: How to Go from Idea to Done, by Charlie Gilkey

The Academy

Momentum App

Jadah Sellner

@jadahsellner

Lead with Love Podcast

She Builds: The Anti-Hustle Guide to Grow Your Business and Nourish Your Life

Elizabeth Gilbert

Neil Gaiman

Toni Morrison

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Key Takeaways:

[4:36] Tara talks about what led her to create the What Works book, a blend of her own personal quest to re-establish her relationship with work and goals, mixed with conversations with people who had all sorts of different relationships to productivity and goals.

[6:08] In the process of Tara’s research for the book, it brought up a deeper conversation of how much culture, family, and upbringing have on our identity, which makes an impact on how we structure our work and the goals we set.

[6:49] We are bombarded by marketing and societal messages that make us feel like we aren’t good enough, or aren’t doing enough.

[7:22] Tara and Charlie discuss why we don’t do the things we really want to do, and why working on teams can be so hard, even though we are primed to work with others.

[12:25] We unpack the validation spiral, and why it’s so common.

[16:21] Externally, one of the ways that we play into the validation spiral is by saying yes to things, taking on projects, and spreading ourselves too thin to do anything impeccably.

[20:23] So many of us are socialized to be the supporting actor when really we can be the lead actor in our own story.

[24:01] Ask yourself: what resources do you need, and where might they come from?

[33:15] When “shoulding” and “supposed to-ing” yourself, get clear and concrete about what exactly you are looking for. Try to get specific about numbers and benchmarks.

[40:15] Why don’t we ask for help before we absolutely need it?

[45:10] Get a support team together before you need the help.

[52:12] As a community, we can learn to break down resistance to ask for help and more openly offer help to others without expecting much in return.

Mentioned in this episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing: How to Go from Idea to Done, by Charlie Gilkey

The Academy

Momentum App

Broken

Down Girl

Tara McMullin

What Works: A Comprehensive Framework to Change the Way We Approach Goal Setting

What Works

What Works Network

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Key Takeaways:

[4:17] Mark talks about the experience of almost dying from a rare form of lymphoma when he was in his 30s, and how it was the introduction to facing the unavoidable work of the friction that comes with life.

[5:32] We must face what is done to us, but we are more than what has been done to us.

[5:41] Mark talks about how the pandemic showed our generation it’s time to learn to choose love over fear, and compassion over self-interest.

[11:20] One of the first “faults” goes back to the Industrial Revolution, where this is the first time in history that where we live and work is separated.

[17:16] Reality TV is our present-day virtual Colosseum.

[27:23] Often spiritually, the safest place is in the center.

[28:09] Every one of us has a daily and perennial choice between love and fear. But there’s a difference between letting fear move through you and obeying it.

[34:38] Through solitude, we restore our direct connection to the universe, and through relationships, we restore the wonder of being human and compassion and kindness.

[37:11] The bad news is we’re always falling. The good news is there’s no bottom.

[47:56] Mark’s challenge and invasion: inhabit life fully by being as open-hearted and as loving as possible. This will require courage, strength, and kindness.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing: How to Go from Idea to Done, by Charlie Gilkey

The Academy

Momentum App

Mark Nepo

Surviving Storms: Finding the Strength To Meet Adversity, by Mark Nepo

The Social Dilemma

Think Like a Monk: Train Your Mind for Peace and Purpose Every Day, by Jay Seti

No Mud, No Lotus: The Art of Transforming Suffering, by Thich Nhat Hanh

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Key Takeaways:

[4:54] Lisa would consider herself mentally ambidextrous. She likes structure and hard problems but also enjoys free thinking. Both these qualities help her as a storyteller and entrepreneur.

[5:04] Lisa talks about deciding that she wanted more out of early retirement than sitting and eating pancakes all day!

[8:36] As a polymath, you can both be multidisciplinary and singularly focused.

[12:44] Sometimes people put themselves in a prison of their own making. Lisa talks about how we can lean into creativity and fun rather than being stuck feeling like we have to do one thing.

[13:21] When we start thinking about making decisions that affect our evolution, we tie in three factors that make them super hard and high-stakes: we make a decision, it is non-reversible, and it seems like it’s non-recoverable.

[15:02] Sometimes we think that we are failing, when we're really in the middle of succeeding, but the only way you know that is to know that you are trying a new thing and experimenting.

[27:00] Lisa discusses how her definition of success was flawed and how she was basing success on outcome rather than creating a process that really reflected where her money and time were going, and if this matched her values.

[38:26] Lifestyle changes can take time.

[1:04:29] It’s often what we are ashamed of and embarrassed about that can lead us to really get what we want.

[1:08:03] Lisa’s challenge to you: make yourself a “to don’t” list.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing: How to Go from Idea to Done, by Charlie Gilkey

The Academy

Momentum App

Behind the Brilliance Podcast

Lisa Nicole Bell

@lisanicolebell

A Whole New Mind

Mr. Money Mustache

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If you’ve ever wanted to do interesting projects with friends and family but traditional business ownership models didn’t feel quite right, this episode is for you. Kate Strathman is an artist, writer, and rebellious spirit. As a multidisciplinary business owner, Kate taps into each of these traits to help others build equitable team structures and dream up alternative business models that may have never previously existed. In this episode, Kate talks about the definition of a collective and how it differs from a cooperative, how to know what purpose, structure, and operating model to use, and what to do when you know it’s time to shift. Kate also discusses how we can better create value for people through our business.

Key Takeaways:

[3:56] Kate talks about how someone with an art degree and a love of wandering around India ended up in bookkeeping and a finance consultancy.

[12:35] Kate defines a cooperative as a business that is owned by the people that benefit from it. There are different types of cooperatives. A worker co-op is a type of business where the employees directly own and control the business, generally on a democratic basis of one person/one vote.

[15:20] In a worker co-op, ownership derives from working in the company, rather than investing in capital.

[23:20] Pay and power are not the same things. Just because you have 50/50 ownership in the business, it might not necessarily mean you get paid the same.

[28:07] Kate talks about some of the conditions that skew us towards a co-op versus more of a standard partnership: the number of people, owner obsolescence, and creating a multi-generational structure.

[49:11] What is the line between resilience and interdependence?

[51:27] Kate’s challenge: think about one way the structure of your business could shift to benefit all the humans and communities it touches.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing: How to Go from Idea to Done, by Charlie Gilkey

The Academy

Momentum App

Wanderwell Consulting

Kate Strathmann

Simple Numbers, Straight Talk, Big Profits!: 4 Keys to Unlock Your Business Potential, by Greg Crabtree, with Beverly Blair Harzog

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This week, New York Times bestselling author and essayist Esmé Wang joins the show. Esmé first talks about growing up with immigrant parents, and how that shaped her ideas of accomplishments and what it meant to succeed as a creative. She details how she went on to go to Yale, became a scientist, and then veered onto the path of writing and how her illness taught her to just “be” instead of always trying to be productive. She shines a light on the lessons she learned from having her book rejected 41 times before being selected as a once-in-a-decade award winner. Esmé is also the founder of The Unexpected Shape Writing Academy.

Key Takeaways:

[2:51] When you’re a creator and dealing with disabilities and chronic illness, one of the things you have to accept is that your plans don’t always work out the way you want them to, because life happens.

[3:19] Esmé talks about growing up as a professional writer with immigrant parents from Taiwan who put a very high emphasis on attending an Ivy League school and productivity.

[12:02] One of the problems of living a creative life and unconventional path is that the normal markers people would use for success may not be there.

[13:05] Esmé’s first book was rejected 41 times before it was picked up by a publisher. She talks about how luck plays a role in success.

[17:53] We all have the same hours in a day as Beyonce, but definitely not the same level of support!

[21:01] Esmé discusses her own dealing with illness as a person that put high importance on output and productivity.

[25:07] How can people with chronic illness and disability reframe the way they look at productivity and time management in a way that doesn’t lead to frustration and disappointment?

[28:01] Culture and our capitalistic society are obsessed with productivity.

[35:08] Able-bodied people often don’t realize how much it takes for someone with a disability or chronic illness to do the things they view as “normal” or easy.

[38:41] How the Momentum App can help.

[42:22] How we can better communicate with the people in our lives when we need a break or are running out of energy.

[53:24] Challenge: write down EVERYTHING you do in a day. Everything. You are doing way more than you think you are.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing: How to Go from Idea to Done, by Charlie Gilkey

The Academy

Momentum App

Esmé Wang

The Unexpected Shape Academy

Adam Grant

Brené Brown

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Tara Newman is the Founder and CEO of the Bold Profit Academy and host of the Bold Money Revolution. She joins the show today for a conversation about the importance of remembering why most of us start businesses and seek out entrepreneurship, how common growth strategies can lead to a lack of resiliency, and how service providers can avoid the mindset of selling themselves. This is a great episode for those wanting to make their business work for them and their life, rather than having their life be working for their business.

Key Takeaways:

[3:58] Many of us come to entrepreneurship out of necessity. Tara talks about her diagnosis of Lyme Disease, and how getting COVID-19 also flared up her EB Virus. To heal, she needed proper time and space to focus on her health journey, which having your own business can allow.

[8:00] The pandemic cycle introduced new layers that we hadn’t had to consider before.

This resulted in many of us having to re-engineer our businesses.

[15:26] Why it’s detrimental to condition your reward system to seek likes, followers, and comments rather than true value.

[19:32] Tara explains how the online business model is the most costly thing she has ever seen.

[23:03] Tara is a big believer that you can be a millionaire without having a million-dollar business.

[24:49] There is no regulation for digital advertising and research shows that up to 88% of ad clicks are fraudulent.

[27:45] Publicly held companies are cutting their ad revenue and marketing because they know they can make sales without them.

[38:07] The biggest benefits to having a profit-first framework as a method.

[48:05] What has Tara learned as a wartime leader?

Mentioned in This Episode:

• Productive Flourishing
• Start Finishing: How to Go from Idea to Done, by Charlie Gilkey
• The Productive Flourishing Academy
• Momentum App
• Tara Newman: Bold Profit Academy

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Steven Kotler is a New York Times bestselling author, an award-winning journalist, and founder and executive director of the Flow Research Collective. He joins the show to talk about how we can access flow and empathy during times of crisis, and how we can learn from the innovation over the pandemic and keep it as we move forward. Steven also talks about the inspiration behind his best-selling thriller, The Devil’s Dictionary.

Key Takeaways:

[3:47] Steven talks about starting his career in journalism and expanding his interest in disruptive technology and how people get and stay in their flow.

[6:50] Steven talks about his thoughts on being a rational optimist, and what we mean when we say radical humanism.

[11:12] How did COVID-19 disrupt the way we work and live when it comes to both AI and material revolution and how can we embrace these changes moving forward?

[26:30] The four best tools to manicure our nervous systems are gratitude, mindfulness, exercise, and regular access to flow. It is imperative that we take advantage of these during a crisis.

[28:44] How do we cooperate at scale at speed without a war driving us forward?

[30:01] Steven talks about his book, The Devil’s Dictionary.

[43:25] Are we going to use these technologies to fix the globally broken supply chain? That’s an open question.

[46:53] Steve explains how we need different models for sharing value at scale than what we currently have.

[51:02] In order to solve world problems, we need empathy for all beings, plants, animals, and ecosystems.

[52:00] If you’re interested in creativity and innovation, and entrepreneurship, you need to tamp down the brain’s negativity bias and make room for new information. The easiest way to do that is through empathy.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing: How to Go from Idea to Done, by Charlie Gilkey

The Academy

Momentum App

Steven Kotler

Thomas Pogge

Devil’s Dictionary

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In this episode, Angela is back as we discuss why it’s important for founders, business owners, and entrepreneurs of all kinds to consider a sabbatical or a “slowbatical.” Just as it sounds, a slowbatical is a time to slow down, recover, and recharge from career stresses. As a society, we have reached a critical point where we are no longer just working hard but working towards imminent burnout; burnout that will cost you, your clients, your employees, and your bottom line. If you’re reading this and thinking, “I can’t do that,” then this episode is especially for you.

Key Takeaways:

[2:56] When reflecting on this episode, Angela realized she and Charlie continued to have the “burnout” discussion without ever taking a break to recharge.

[7:41] What is a slowbatical? And why it’s more attainable than a true sabbatical.

[9:59] So many of us have reached a tipping point where today’s pace is driving us to burnout on a detrimental scale.

[10:42] One positive of the pandemic is we have begun talking more about burnout and the need for slowing down; even though it was at a tipping point before COVID-19.

[12:48] When we talk about burnout, most people think about being incapacitated but there are levels of burnout. Oftentimes, it’s more gradual than a dramatic implosion.

[14:53] Rather than waiting for a falling out, it’s best to plan for what to do if there is burnout.

[16:06] The OEN April panel discussion spared an important issue which is why there is so much pressure and threat of burnout on founders and small business owners, especially.

[23:55] It’s okay to recognize what role privilege plays in the need for sabbaticals and slowbaticals without discounting the importance.

[27:07] While this episode has an emphasis on founders, it is just as important for those with side hustles or traditional jobs to allow themselves the mindset to slow down.

[30:24] There may be a cost to taking a break, but there will likely be a bigger cost to not taking one.

[34:48] What and when founders and business owners can plan for sabbaticals and slowbatticals.

[44:48] It’s time to stop saying, “I can’t” when it comes to sabbaticals and slowbaticals. And start asking, “Why?”

[46:15] The two questions you need to ask when thinking about a slowbatical are 1) What are you making space to do more of? 2) What are you making space from?

[49:00] Time and time again, people that take slowbaticals find that results remain relatively the same.

[54:15] Angela has not only helped clients and seen their growth with slowbaticals but she’s also had to examine and struggle with this in her own life.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing: How to Go from Idea to Done, by Charlie Gilkey

The Academy

Momentum App

OEN April PubTalk

Wanderwell

“Under Pressure” — The Portland Business Journal

YNAB

Hell Yeah or No, by Derek Sivers

“Relax for the Same Result,” by Derek Sivers

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In this episode, Jenny Blake joins Charlie on the show to talk about free time and how systems can help us create more of it in our busy lives. The real goal of effective systems is to help us do our best work, free up our energy, and pursue what matters to us. Jenny and Charlie discuss what keeps people from building the right systems, why our ideas of hard work play into the systems we build, and how to start creating more free time in our businesses and personal lives. If you want more free time, this episode is going to be an eye-opener.

Key Takeaways:

[3:13] How did Jenny end up with the book Free Time? She explains how she was inspired to write her first two books, Life After College and Pivot, and Free Time is about optimizing what's now.

[6:54] A lot of books on systems tend to be quite dense and complex. Jenny's aim was to bring some levity to the conversation with her book.

[9:23] For business owners, Charlie highlights some important things to keep in mind about people sharing their numbers.

[12:57] What is Free Time about? At its core, it's a book that helps you make your business work for you without so much work to make it work.

[19:25] We need to start thinking about systems differently. A system is essentially a set of interrelated, interconnected parts that produce a consistent result. Oftentimes, in organizations, it can feel like people are at fault, but the underlying issues may be the work systems that have been created.

[21:52] Jenny shares some examples of the importance of having systems on the personal and household front.

[34:45] When we look at the things we don’t like to do or are not good at doing from another perspective, we can actually see that there are people out there who are good at it, and who want to do it, and will benefit economically from doing it.

[37:29] One of the things we have to take seriously in all teams is the energy and emotions that we inject into them.

[40:32] The bottleneck and chief constraint in a business is often not time, but energy and attention.

[43:51] Jenny and Charlie discuss infinite games and how happiness and free time tie into that.

[52:20] Creating systems can start by thinking of what you would like an ideal world to look like. The point is not to get caught in the minute details of how that is possible but merely visualize and dream what is possible.

[57:29] Strategic laziness can be a helpful concept to tap into to create systems and processes in your business to make things easier for your future self.

[62:25] Jenny invites listeners to do less. So much of free time is permission, and that permission is to be a little bit radical with your free time.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing: How to Go from Idea to Done, by Charlie Gilkey

Free Time: Lose the Busywork, Love Your Business, by Jenny Blake

Pivot: The Only Move That Matters Is Your Next One. by Jenny Blake

Life After College: The Complete Guide to Getting What You Want. by Jenny Blake

Productive Flourishing Podcast “Episode 72: How to Embrace Uncertainty Through a Career Change with Jenny Blake”

Pivot Podcast

Free Time Podcast

One Stone Creative

The Infinite Game, by Simon Sinek

Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World, by Cal Newport

Tim Ferris, Strategic Laziness

Andrew Wilkinson — Lazy Leadership

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In this episode, Productive Flourishing team members Cory Huff, Steve Arensberg, and Maghan Haggerty join Charlie on the show to talk about the Start Finishing Field Guide, the workbook version of Charlie's best selling book, Start Finishing. In this behind-the-scenes chat with some team members who helped bring the field guide into existence, hear more about some lessons the team learned along the way, the challenges they faced, and why this is the perfect time to launch this workbook. It's going to be an episode with takeaways for everyone, regardless of whether you're a writer, creator, or team leader.

Key Takeaways:

[4:07] Charlie explains his process of writing Start Finishing, and how it turned out to be the kind of book that it is.

[6:08] Steve was the champion for the Start Finishing Field Guide from the beginning. He shares more about why he felt the worksheets and guides that accompanied Start Finishing were so important.

[8:00] When writing a non-fiction book, it is always important to be open to other bits of collateral that you might need to support it.

[9:05] It took a lot of effort to bring the Start Finishing Field Guide into existence. Steve talks about why important tasks that aren’t urgent can sometimes get pushed to the back, especially if there isn’t someone in the organization to champion them.

[10:47] There was a gap between the information presented in Start Finishing and readers actually translating that into a final finished project.

[13:50] How did Maghan get roped into the field guide of Start Finishing? She talks about how she started as part of a street team to promote Start Finishing and found herself needing companion worksheets to better process the concepts it covered.

[15:44] Charlie outlines the timeline for the field guide and how it ended up being launched now.

[17:50] Steve talks about some of the calculations and approximations the team had to do around the cost of producing the field guide, as well as how the team decided which other projects were going to be put on the backburner for this.

[20:35] What are some of the differences between publishing a workbook and a traditionally published book?

[24:48] What's the thought process behind creating worksheets to help people grasp concepts or ideas better?

[29:39] For Maghan, working out how to translate each chapter of the book into worksheets essentially became a lesson for her on what to do next and how to implement the principle of that chapter in her life.

[34:11] The team shares their reflections on what they have learned from working on the field guide and being a part of the PF team.

[42:02] Why is the book called a field guide rather than a workbook? It’s a great resource to have along the journey!

[44:16] Sign up to get the details about the field guide when it gets released.

[45:32] Steve, Maghan, and Cory share their final thoughts to wrap up the interview.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing: How to Go from Idea to Done, by Charlie Gilkey

Momentum Planners

Sounds True

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In this episode, Angela joins Charlie on the show after a long hiatus to talk about her concussion rehabilitation process and what she has been going through since July when she experienced a traumatic brain injury (TBI). Angela has been going through an intensive rehabilitation program, and it has been an exhausting experience for her. Her history with TBIs has impacted her in more than one way, and she and Charlie share how her neural deficits have inspired them both to change and adapt, as well as to ask and receive help when they need it.

Key Takeaways:

[2:16] Angela experienced traumatic brain injury (TBI) in July and has been going through concussion rehabilitation since then. It has been a journey of learning to navigate the changes Angela has experienced in her thinking and thought patterns, both for herself and Charlie.

[5:37] Team discussions have also taken on a different dynamic within PF with more neurodiversity. This has encouraged the team to become more reflective and introspective about how they share their material.

[7:28] Angela’s recent concussion is likely her eighth serious TBI. She talks a little about her experience with previous TBIs and how they have impacted her.

[13:24] It is possible to have a TBI without blacking out, or any of the other common symptoms doctors screen for. Additionally, having TBI makes you more susceptible to additional TBIs.

[17:11] Concussions and TBIs are a lot more common than people think they are. Oftentimes, changes that people, especially women, experience because of TBIs are misattributed to hormonal changes.

[20:56] Angela has been on an intensive concussion rehabilitation program working with multiple specialists. It has been an exhausting experience for her, and she explains why.

[27:30] When dealing with TBIs, it is important for the medical team to have a baseline of what the person's original level of functioning was. It makes all the difference in how they’re evaluating the person’s progress. Having someone else to advocate for you can help in this situation.

[36:02] What are some things Angela and Charlie have learned from this journey? The first thing they realized was how much Angela was in charge of care work in the home, and how that had to change after her injury.

[44:30] The second thing they learned was that Angela’s schedule had been lying to her. Charlie and Angela talk more about how they helped her get into momentum planning to schedule her time.

[49:54] Angela is still deep in the throes of her rehab, but there are already things she is grateful for.

[51:05] Something that has helped Angela in this process is “sense naps.”

[55:23] Knowing how to ask for help and how to accept it is one of the hardest things to do.

[59:58] While most of this conversation has been focused on Angela’s journey, Charlie has also experienced some catalytic changes.

[64:14] Angela invites listeners to be honest with themselves about where they are and where their capacity is. It starts from there to let the people around you know where you are, so they can engage and interact with you as you are.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing: How to Go from Idea to Done, by Charlie Gilkey

Momentum Planners

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Ashley Zuberi, yoga teacher, author, and former teammate of Team Productive Flourishing, joins Charlie on the show to discuss how we can reframe yoga, spiritual practices, and mindfulness so that we can integrate them into our days and make them work for us. Spiritual practices and philosophy are best suited to help us live our actual lives more fully rather than trying to create an ideal version of ourselves. Charlie and Ashley discuss how spirituality shows up in our day-to-day life and why it will always be a work in progress.

Key Takeaways:

[2:40] For many people, doing yoga, and cultivating a meditation or mindfulness practice are on their to-do list. Yet, people struggle with actually starting and maintaining these practices. Ashley addresses why people can get stuck before beginning.

[5:29] Creating a meditation or yoga or spiritual practice is hard, and it's because it requires experimentation where people are looking for someone to tell them what to do.

[7:03] One way to approach these practices is by integrating these practices into our lives in a more practical way. Ashley outlines how this plays out in her own life.

[8:34] Charlie reflects on how his relationship with yoga has changed since 2020. Yoga is much more than just practicing poses. In its original form, yoga was a meditation practice!

[12:58] It can be just as, if not more, helpful to do shorter periods of yoga more frequently rather than longer sessions at larger intervals. What has happened is the assimilation and co-opting of other traditions into a Western paradigm.

[15:40] A lot of what drives our actions is being more efficient and doing things more as efficiently as possible. However, that's not the goal in a spiritual practice.

[17:54] Even hugs can be a part of your yoga practice if you are tuning into the present moment and practicing presence.

[21:46] Spirituality is what happens in the moment and not just what happens in the special containers we create for them.

[23:12] Charlie and Ashley discuss what it means to truly be able to show up as your full self at work, particularly now with COVID-19 and working from home.

[25:29] COVID-19 has had some negative impacts on this generation of children, but looking beyond the arbitrary constructs and structures, we can see some other benefits like children seeing their parents at work, and parents being able to spend more time with their kids.

[26:28] Charlie explains more about different types of reality, the objective, subjective, and interest objective, and how this ties into spiritual practices.

[30:01] Our understanding of what yoga is evolves and changes with time. Charlie and Ashley share what it means for each of them and how it influences how they show up in the world.

[34:33] What are some steps we can take to move forward from this conversation and start our spiritual practice?

[43:55] Each of us has our own challenges and struggles with our spiritual practice. What is Ashley feeling most challenged by now?

[48:50] Ashley invites you to try something today that helps you find more peace.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing: How to Go from Idea to Done, by Charlie Gilkey

Ashley Zuberi

Eight Dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love, by John M. Gottman, Doug Abrams, Julie Gottman, Rachel Carlton Abrams

The Mom Project

Sapiens: A Brief History of Humankind, by Yuval Noah Harari

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Jeffrey Davis, branding consultant, repeat guest, and author of the new book, Tracking Wonder, joins Charlie on the show to discuss how we can reconcile productivity and wonder. Our culture’s obsession with productivity has a bias against wonder and yet wonder is essential for our creativity, satisfaction, and belonging. They discuss how these seemingly opposing forces balance each other and allow us to thrive and flourish, not merely be more productive.

Key Takeaways:

[2:10] Jeffrey shares the journey of how he wrote his latest book, Tracking Wonder. It was a process of discovery and learning through extreme adversity and crisis.

[8:42] When we go on these journeys as thinkers and writers, there is often an intense pressure for it to be quick. Often, this is not the case and it can take months or years for ideas to come to fruition.

[12:18] Fifteen to 20 years ago, positive psychology was still in its infancy, and the only option then was to turn to philosophy to talk about thriving, wonder, happiness, belonging, etc. Now, there is science to back it up.

[15:49] The past 18 months, both culturally and socially, have raised a lot of questions about meaning and relationships.

[17:03] Charlie and Jeffrey discuss measuring productivity; it has always been difficult to measure and has become even more difficult recently. Why are we tracking only certain metrics for productivity and efficiency and not others?

[22:06] There is a lot of work to be done, and it does have an impact on the company’s bottom line. On the flip side, as leaders, we need to have the integrity to recognize that people need to go out and do something different than just being stuck to their screens all day.

[25:06] Charlie reflects on an interestingly productive time of his day — when he goes on his coffee walks in the morning.

[29:05] There are a lot of things that look like not working, that make the working actually happen.

[32:11] Getting off a structured routine can be a very bewildering experience of deinstitutionalization. When we get off the path fixed for us, we have to create boundaries, rhythms, and structures for ourselves.

[37:02] How can we navigate that sense of bewilderment and disorientation when our rhythms are disrupted? Bewilderment fatigue can be a challenge, and sometimes we may disengage or bypass as a way of escaping reality.

[40:41] Wonder has six facets. Jeffrey explains each one briefly. 1: Openness, 2: Curiosity, 3: Bewilderment, 4: Hope, 5: Connection, 6: Admiration.

[44:16] How can productivity and wonder coexist? They seem to be at odds with each other, yet a balance is necessary.

[48:10] We are more than our work. Charlie shares some ways to detach ourselves from our work in the language we use.

[49:57] You are what you pay attention to. What are you paying attention to, and what are you focusing on?

[53:31] How can we shape our time together better so that we develop more connection?

[56:04] Jeffery used the design of his book to invoke wonder and bewilderment.

[60:05] Jeffrey invites and challenges listeners to conduct an experiment at the beginning, middle, and end of your day to bring more openness, surprise, elevation, or connection.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing: How to Go from Idea to Done, by Charlie Gilkey

Jeffrey Davis

Tracking Wonder: Reclaiming a Life of Meaning and Possibility in a World Obsessed with Productivity, by Jeffrey Davis

The Journey from the Center to the Page: Yoga Philosophies and Practices as Muse for Authentic Writing, by Jeff Davis

Shiva Sutras

“Why You Need to Protect Your Sense of Wonder — Especially Now,” by David P. Fessell and Karen Reivich for Harvard Business Review

Bewilderment, by Richard Powers

Sounds True

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Pam Slim, business coach, speaker, and author of the new book The Widest Net, joins Charlie on the show to discuss how building your business from an ecosystem paradigm instead of an empire paradigm changes everything — from how you do marketing to your approach to partnerships. They discuss the importance of having a focused beacon in your work, getting into the flow of building partnerships, and how to successfully start and grow your business in collaboration with others.

Key Takeaways:

[2:07] An arc connects all three of Pam's books — Escape from Cubicle Nation, Body of Work, and Widest Net. She explains the trajectory of the reader going through all three books.

[4:51] Pam has experienced several different configurations of working since her first book. She shares more about her journey with work, and how she has built up her network of relationships.

[8:18] In her book, The Widest Net, Pam talks about some of the other elements of marketing that are more relatable and inclusive. At its foundation, The Widest Net is focused on shifting the paradigm from “building an empire” to “building an ecosystem.”

[13:51] A lot of marketing already happens within an ecosystem model.

[16:33] Whether you’re going deep in cultivating relationships or broad in reaching out to a large audience, you still have to do marketing, and you still have to do the work.

[18:22] There is a distinction between relational connections and transactional connections.

[21:21] As an expert within your field, you need to have a beacon. It is your responsibility to be really clear about what you do, your perspective, and your unique approach.

[23:32] Many of us want to showcase all of our talents and interests, and illustrate that we have range. However, this can be problematic from a business perspective. Pam and Charlie discuss how to build a better beacon for our work.

[28:33] You don’t have to let go of all your passions, interests, and different revenue streams in your business. It’s all about what you're shining the light on.

[30:26] When our beacons are too diffuse, it makes it hard for people to refer us to others.

[31:00] Partnerships are an essential part of building success in the ecosystem model. Pam explains how having “peanut butter and jelly” partners and brand partnerships can be useful.

[36:31] How can we start positioning ourselves to get into the flow of building partnerships? It can be difficult, especially for underestimated or overlooked founders.

[41:51] Pam shares some of the things she has learned about her own business and journey in writing The Widest Net.

[49:34] Pam invites listeners to identify partners to help them market their business. The first place to start is with your favorite clients, customers, and people you work with.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing: How to Go from Idea to Done, by Charlie Gilkey

Pam Slim

The Widest Net: Unlock Untapped Markets and Discover New Customers Right in Front of You, by Pamela Slim

Books by Pam Slim

Main Street Learning Lab

Backstage Capital

RareBreed Ventures

Overlooked Ventures

The Plug Newsletter

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KC Carter, meditation teacher, executive coach, and author, joins Charlie on the show to discuss the four permissions that will help us live a fuller life and be great leaders. They touch on how some of these permissions are sneakily radical, and KC’s process of setting aside the time to make his new book Permission to Glow a reality.

Key Takeaways:

[3:07] - In his work, KC shows up in many different communities throughout the world. Those with a brand around nonfiction are often under pressure to show up one way all the time, but we are human beings that contain multitudes.

[7:23] - The law of accumulation says that we are more than all that we’ve ever lived, and we’re lucky if we can integrate some of that into our work. There can be a perpetual discomfort knowing which part to display in a given setting to get people to believe what you have to share.

[10:15] - KC shares his process in overcoming the enormity of his book project to stay focused and on task, as well as to carve out the time to make it happen. He was able to draw on his experience putting a song together and recognizing the joy that comes at the end of a project.

[16:20] - Glow vs shine: the reason glow resonated more than shine is because of the longevity of its potential, and it allows a wider spectrum of what it means to glow. Glow comes from within rather than reflecting light when we shine.

[20:00] - KC talks through the four permissions: 1. Permission to chill 2. Permission to feel all the feels 3. Permission to glow in the dark 4. Permission to transcend competition for collaboration and uplift our human family

[25:40] - The radicalness of the four permissions comes from looking at them in reverse order. Permissions 3 and 4 focus more on what we can do together, but Permissions 1 and 2 are radical in their own right because as a society, we don’t often prioritize these things.

[32:20] - KC talks about his struggle with the second of the previous permissions. Because his intelligence centers around his mind (rather than the heart), it can be difficult to let people into his process of struggle and victory.

[36:25] - KC also included a 5th permission, 5. Permission to suck. This allows people to keep compassion as they create change in their lives.

[42:30] - The permissions are like a vine that continues to propagate throughout your life, and they change you as they change on external and internal levels.

[45:40] - If you want to get started on these concepts, the default place to get started would be to create a daily meditation habit. That’s the foundation of conscious leadership.

[52:03] - KC’s challenge to listeners is based on Permission 3 - look around at the fear in today’s world, and ask yourself “What would it take for me to defiantly glow in this darkness, no matter what?”

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

Permission to Glow, Kristoffer (KC) Carter

KC Carter

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Andrea Owen returns to the show to talk about her new book, Make Some Noise. She and Charlie talk about the unlearning we all need to do to be able to speak our minds, with a specific focus on how challenging this is to do for women, and why. They also discuss the importance of unlearning through your own process.

Key Takeaways:

[3:00] - Andrea talks through the trajectory of this book compared to her previous book, given the current climate of women’s empowerment and looking back into the culture that raised us.

[6:50] - Her book gets to the root of many issues, and sometimes that’s uncomfortable. But going out of our way to make people comfortable with the conversation sometimes can exclude people from entering the conversation as their authentic selves.

[11:30] - Charlie and Andrea talk about the idea of generational transmissions, and how the same head trash that affected our parents and grandparents still affects us today.

[13:33] - One of the best tools Andrea has learned is to get curious about why you’re acting the way that you are. It doesn’t mean you are wrong for it, but it’s valuable to explore where that’s coming from.

[17:25] - Andrea talks about the pendulum of “the norm” over the past few years, and the wake up call we all received around 2016. As the pendulum is moving back towards the middle, we will be able to have candid and vulnerable conversations that are necessary to unpack “the norm” to move forward to real social change.

[25:50] - Charlie and Andrea talk about some of the reasons it’s so difficult for women to initiate difficult and vulnerable conversations, as they are often waiting for other people to take care of their needs. It starts with this unpacking and unlearning of the conditioning and socialization that we’ve received.

[28:10] - Andrea walks us through the four steps of unlearning: 1. Pay attention 2. Get curious 3. Self compassion 4. Keep the momentum

[33:50] - In the process of unlearning, there will be feelings of discomfort, and that is okay. The important thing we can be responsible for is our behavior when reacting to those feelings.

[37:00] - Another important topic Andrea includes in the book is money. Women tend to not talk about money and tend to not invest, even though they are often more successful than their male counterparts.

[41:20] - Andrea talks about a specific experience with trying to find a babysitter, and the importance of having important conversations with young girls around their worth. Boys are often socialized much differently even from a young age, especially when it comes to financial worth.

[46:12] - What you charge is not your value; you should charge for the value that you bring, but the value that you bring is not your personal worth.

[47:30] - Andrea talks about the list of things to start and stop doing that is outlined in her book, as well as which she finds most challenging to work on.

[52:55] - Andrea’s invitation for listeners is to think about your conditioning and your socialization, how it is or isn’t serving you, and what you are doing to change it.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

Make Some Noise, by Andrea Owen

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Larry Robertson returns to the podcast for this episode to talk about his new book and way of thinking about leadership, Rebel Leadership. He and Charlie talk about why the times we are living in now will be the norm for the century, the upshot of this uncertainty, why future proofing is inevitably going to be a no-win scenario, and how we can thrive despite difficulties of the work ahead. We all have the capability of leadership within us, and today’s conversation will inspire listeners to step into it.

Key Takeaways:

[2:50] - Rebel and leadership are both terms that people are simultaneously attracted to and repelled by; however, the best aspect of both is how we can thrive in these uncertain times. Rebels are innovative, open, experimental, and adaptable. On the leadership side, the best leaders create an environment where everyone can lead in their own way.

[8:25] - As we move forward in a VUCA (volatile, uncertain, complex, and ambiguous) world, we will experience risk in one of two ways: conventional risk and storm-surge risk. We are experiencing both more often and more simultaneously than the human race has before.

[12:50] - Rather than trying to contain the uncertainty, we have to prepare for and learn to live in that uncertainty. Larry talks about structure in organizations and our own preparedness, and using that structure as support for your larger purpose. This VUCA world is an opportunity to create a new normal.

[16:30] - Larry and Charlie talk about the idea of future proofing, and how it can be dangerous to focus on future proofing, because it doesn’t allow you to see opportunities in the middle of difficult times. Future readiness recognizes that we have to continually adapt.

[19:35] - This new book is kind of an evolution out of Larry’s previous two books, focusing on how we lead out of our ideas into something bigger, and how leadership has changed. He combined four ideas to make this book: a sense of incompleteness, time relevance of uncertain times, looking for something new in leadership, and identifying patterns of success for people leading in uncertain times.

[26:30] - The people that are creating value and impact are engaging and re-engaging in the creative process to not only materialize their best work, but also evaluate what that means, especially over time. Moving on this continuum can make it easier to get started on the next part of your body of work.

[30:10] - When advancing on our next body of work, it’s important to dig deep into what people have thought along the way, what went well and what went poorly, and what kept them on the path through the ups and downs. The back and forth of digging and advancing is part of the mix all the time.

[33:35] - Larry talks about his interview process. With a broader audience, the more revelatory it is. If you can broaden out the spaces that you’re serving, you’re going to start to see patterns emerge. These patterns become lessons that can transfer.

[41:00] - A key thing about interviews is that we often think we need better answers, but in reality we need better questions, and the willingness to engage with them in a way that fits the question.

[45:20] - Another thing to recognize is that during this interview and exploration process, we may not always get closure on a question or idea. Recognizing the power in the idea of accepting the incomplete, we have to begin to apply it across the board, not just to isolated experiences.

[47:00] - Each of the five insights explored in the book are helpful and powerful, but what they do in combination surprised Larry the most. The interconnection became so important, and as he realized the power, he was able to emphasize that for readers.

[51:55] - As Charlie is writing his new book, Work Ways, this same interconnection becomes important as we examine how making changes in one aspect of work will affect everything else, especially in the times we live in today as we transition back to the workplace. The reality of the uncertainty around us is that it is real, but it is also necessary. Uncertainty is how we stay curious and advance ourselves.

[1:01:25] - Larry’s challenge for listeners is to think about leadership differently; it’s not leadership in the traditional way we have thought about it, but an inherent capacity in all of us. His invitation to listeners is to rethink what leadership is, realize that you have a place in it, and choose to step into it.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

Rebel Leadership, by Larry Robertson

Body of Work, by Pamela Slim

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Key Takeaways:

[2:15] - The elephant is not the only creature in the room. The idea behind naming the mouse in the room is that sometimes you have to acknowledge the more subtle things in the room - they’re not always as big as an elephant. When we don’t name our mice, we’re more disconnected from our souls and from others.

[8:40] - Charlie talks about the model of “name it, claim it, tame it.” We often can name our feelings, but until we claim them as true, we can’t do anything to tame them, to be able to live and work with them. Emotion drives action, and when we claim those emotions it’s easier to relate to the world through our stories. 

[12:51] - Naming mice is a doorway to deeper connection, more confidence, and stronger leadership. Having these conversations gives us the opportunity to be more deeply connected  to what’s actually happening.

[16:05] - David selected a mouse to represent this idea because it already relates to a saying and concept we have in society, and its size represents the little moments that happen in between the big things in our lives. 

[19:55] - At its heart, David’s book is about awareness. Once we become aware of these feelings or moments, then we get the opportunity to name it, welcome it, and acknowledge that it is okay. This acknowledgement is where transformation can begin. 

[26:05] - Charles talks about some of the different reactions we feel when we name our mice. In some cultures there is a tendency to take immediate action, but we have the freedom to sit with what we’ve named and just allow it to be. 

[31:15] - The same goes for our interactions with others when they name their mice. Authentic relating is about just being with someone to explore what it’s like to feel what they are feeling. As we each relate to the world through our stories, we have the opportunity to weave a common reality. 

[38:05] - How much of the range of human experience do we not allow ourselves to experience because we’re afraid to name the mice or share our vulnerabilities? If we don’t acknowledge our emotions, it is hard to move through them and transform them. 

[43:56] - David’s call to action for listeners is to visit the Kickstarter page, join the campaign, and share the movement. The more people we get naming mice, the more we can begin to transform the world. 

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

Name That Mouse Kickstarter Campaign

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Today’s guest is Kris Putnam-Walkerly, author of Delusional Altruism: Why Philanthropists Fail to Achieve Change and What They Can Do to Transform Giving. She and Charlie talk about the barriers philanthropists face in making change happen, and Kris shares some of what she writes about in her book on ways to overcome them. Most importantly, they discuss whether the word philanthropy itself is one of these barriers for social funders and investors.

Key Takeaways:

[2:50] - Kris now works with philanthropists as an advisor and strategist, assessing impact and making changes based on what works and what doesn’t. Originally starting with a master’s in social work, her journey through different family foundations led her to this opportunity she has now.

[5:35] - Kris defines philanthropy as actively promoting human welfare, and generosity and caring for others. While giving money is a big part of philanthropy, the definition extends to giving of our full selves to help our neighbors, communities, and the greater good.

[8:20] - Charlie and Kris talk about whether the word philanthropy is culturally problematic. When considering the connotation of the words, phrases, or norms we perpetuate, we have to be conscious of racism or structural inequities, and implications they have for people’s lives today.

[12:15] - As people begin to think about themselves as philanthropists or funders, it’s important to put yourself in uncomfortable positions and make sure you aren’t shying away from the hard problems. Nonprofits can help with this, but funders need to challenge themselves as well.

[14:55] - Kris talks about overcoming the barrier of overwhelm, especially in an ever-changing world: 1. Start with the right questions (why and what), 2.an valuate where you’re at toda, 3. Figure out what focus items you need to work on to move you forward.

[21:50] - Charlie and Kris talk about complexity capacity, and the barrier for philanthropists and funders taking on projects that will take an extended time to play out. They talk about putting reality into a relatable context, and also recognizing interim progress and engagement points along the way.

[26:45] - Charlie shares his own experience fighting racial inequity and social justice on the board of SVP Portland. They looked at what was causing disparate outcomes in the community, and identified where they could make the biggest change.

[32:19] - Once your plan is in action, you also have to intentionally check in to see what’s working and not working, and make changes as necessary. Disruption and volatility are the status quo.

[33:50] - It can be frustrating for the entrepreneurial sector who are used to identifying problems and solutions on their own and at a fast pace. It is important for the entrepreneurial spirit and the coalition mindset to come together to make change happen in the most effective ways.

[38:45] - In her book, Kris writes about ways to increase your speed (especially on the coalition side), while also noting that you have to have all the pieces in place for effective processes before you can kick things off. You have to allow time for connectivity to be established, but move quickly enough that the interest and funding remains.

[40:15] - Charlie and Kris talk about what’s on the horizon for social investors and funders as we are moving toward a recovery period after this pandemic. In addition to looking ahead, organizations should also look back at the past year to identify things they would like to maintain going forward or changes they need to make to remain effective.

[44:45] - Kris’ invitation for listeners is to reflect on your strategy, and refresh your strategy based on your reflections over the past year and your team’s plans moving forward. This will give clarity and flexibility.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

Delusional Altruism, by Kris Putnam-Walkerly

8 Things Every Philanthropist Can Do - Free Guide

Can’t Not Do, by Paul Shoemaker

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In this episode, Charlie and Angela talk about managing the business in the midst of also having to take care of family. Currently in Arkansas to help take care of both sets of parents, they talk about how we sometimes have to shift our priorities for different seasons of life, and how to utilize skills sets across all facets of our lives, especially to help the communities and people that matter most to us.

Key Takeaways:

[3:15] - In the midst of COVID-19, as well as a rapidly growing and changing business, Charlie and Angela chose to travel to Arkansas to help take care of family. When Angela knew she needed to be there with her parents, they made the decision to come together because Charlie’s dad is also struggling with serious health issues.

[8:10] - Charlie and Angela talk about the different motivations behind their decisions, and how it created the scenario for both of them to go together so they could serve as an anchor for each other, not just personally but also navigating the business from a new place.

[11:01] - One of their biggest challenges with this transition is navigating and negotiating how they are going to show up to the business and for their families each day, and defining what their general level of success looks like day to day. One of their greatest joint values is priorities, and it’s necessary for those to look a little different in their current situation.

[15:50] - Angela talks about some of the lessons she’s learned from her team’s support during this time. They work hard in their business to provide a supportive environment for their teams, and now that is being reciprocated while Charlie and Angela are in a different place (literally and figuratively).

[20:00] - Being back in Arkansas has also allowed both Charlie and Angela to reflect on what it was like for them growing up in Ft. Smith and what has (and hasn’t) changed. They talk about the disparity in life outcomes, even within their own families, as well as how the medical system contributes to this disparity not only in Arkansas but across the country.

[29:50] - Advocacy has been incredibly important even from the beginning of their relationship, and especially now, as they are navigating something new. Entrepreneurs, executives, and business owners often fall into the trap of applying their current mindset and worldview back against where they started. It’s going to be different; the important thing is to apply the tools and skills that you learned from your business to healthy advocacy for yourself and others.

[39:35] - Being back home has been an important reminder to listen - really hear what they are saying and help them get their needs fulfilled. This is incredibly true for any type of provider.

[43:15] - It’s easy to lose your “superpowers” when you’re around your family, and let boundaries crumble. To avoid this, apply your GATES (genius, affinities, talents, expertise, strengths) to be of service to your family and your people. It can be a tricky balance to apply these skills, but asking for permission grants the other person the autonomy to accept help. Get alignment on how you can be a part of where they want to go.

[52:15] - When life comes in and competing priorities happen, how do you shift what success looks like to be in harmony with the other things that are important in your life? Remember that you are the one who calibrates your priorities.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

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Today’s guests are Dustin Granger and Danielle Granger Nava, the brother-sister duo behind Toujours Planning. Toujours is a full service wealth management firm that caters to professionals and pre-retirees across the US. They join Charlie today to talk about what it’s like to work with a sibling, and how they have been able to foster a great working relationship.

Key Takeaways:

[2:40] - When it comes to working with siblings or family, there are generally two camps: 1. Yeah, I could do that, and 2. Absolutely not. Dustin and Danielle’s father was in the financial planning business, and Dustin started working for him first before he recruited his sister to join him.

[6:40] - Danielle talks about her resistance to joining her brother, not because of hesitance about working with her brother, but because of fear about making her way in an industry mostly dominated by males. Dustin also experienced some imposter syndrome as a young professional in the industry.

[11:25] - The family dynamics are something that had to shift when Dustin took over and Danielle later came on board. Being able to work with his father was a wonderful learning experience, and now Dustin is like a mentor to Danielle. In a similar way, Danielle helps to calm Dustin down, so their dynamic is kind of a hybrid between siblings and best friends. Open communication has been key!

[17:38] - One of the biggest challenges of working together has been adjusting to their respective managerial roles, and syncing up their communication styles. Whenever there is tension, they resolve it quickly through a conversation.

[22:00] - They’ve grown together as they have worked together to figure out their roles in a small business, especially the org chart and defining that, not only for Dustin and Danielle, but also for their team.

[29:10] - Setting boundaries between work and family has been an important part of growth since they started working together as well. It’s important for any working partnership (friend-friend, partner-partner) to know when you should talk about work versus separating those elements and relationships.

[33:45] - As Dustin hopes to pivot, he is having to let go of some of his managerial style. Danielle is trying to take the best elements of both of their styles as the primary responsibility shifts to her, while they are still both being true to themselves.

[36:45] - One of the hardest things about working with a sibling for Danielle is being worried about a huge rift or something coming in between their sibling relationship or working relationship. For Dustin, one of the hardest things is feeling protective of Danielle from a business standpoint, but also giving her the space to grow.

[44:30] - Danielle’s advice for anyone who may be interested in going into the family business is to avoid going into business with a family member who you frequently find yourself in conflict with. For Dustin, having a sense of humor is important to keep things light. Using face-to-face communication to talk and work things out is also incredibly important.

[49:10] - Danielle’s challenge for any women listening is to go for those big opportunities that are out there. You can do it! Don’t play the comparison game or let fear overtake what you really want for your career. Dustin’s challenge/invitation is to not be afraid to form your business to what fits your personality, especially as relationships evolve.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

Toujours Planning

The Ensemble Practice, by Philip Palaveev

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Today’s guest is Karwanna Dyson, an entrepreneur helping other women and minorities build successful and sustainable businesses by becoming government contractors. She shares her story of growing up in a poor urban community to becoming a thriving small business owner. Karwanna and Charlie talk about the unique opportunity small businesses have to change and support their community. Her story is one of strength and determination - despite the situations in front of us, there’s always a way to move forward.

Key Takeaways:

[1:55] - Growing up in an urban community, Karwanna knew she didn’t want to become a product of her environment. She forged a path that included a college education and corporate America, before she decided to pursue her own dreams by starting her own business. She talks about how she was able to see beyond what her community offered.

[8:25] - Karwanna talks about the things she learned on her path to success that they didn’t teach in school. The things that are unspoken, like credit, finances, and how to build a business, are things she learned out of determination to succeed.

[10:55] - Anyone can start and be successful in business, no matter your background or where you come from. Charlie and Karwanna talk about some of the disparities in starting a business, and demystify some of the preconceived notions about what is or isn’t possible in starting a business.

[18:45] - Karwanna talks about chasing purpose versus chasing profit in her own business. She was chasing profit for at least five years. Although she did get some profit, she spent more time chasing and profiting, and it was exhausting. Tapping into and chasing passion was the key to a notable shift in revenue and success.

[23:30] - For anyone who is looking to start a business, start with something you are passionate about. This goes back to growing up as well - our passion is something that is already within us. Remember your deferred dreams even as an adult.

[30:05] - Karwanna talks about her mindset during this pandemic, and the importance of connecting with people who are winning during this time. Being informed of resources available to you and your business is important to thrive during this time. She fleshes out what it means to “not participate” in the pandemic in terms of mindset.

[35:25] - In order to stay successful, sometimes you need to pivot (especially during this time) and know where to move. There are several small businesses who have seized the opportunities to pivot and actually experienced growth in the past year.

[38:00] - One of the greatest business decisions Karwanna has made is changing her focus from individual consumers to the government being her primary customer. The government has resources allocated to spend on small business products and services. Government contracting can help sustain your business as part of your business model.

[40:40] - Karwanna talks about how this epiphany changed her business but also gave her an opportunity to give back to the urban community she grew up in. With a B2G (business to government) business model, you can leverage more of your revenue to be a changemaker in your community.

[43:55] - One of the challenges she’s currently facing is gaining a media presence to get the right messaging out for people. How can we change the narrative of what we see in the media or get the right voices heard? Karwanna is trying to bring back positive messaging to bring communities together.

[47:50] - Karwanna’s invitation to listeners and entrepreneurs is to explore her resources, and especially her checklist to see if your business can qualify for government contracting. Also, how can you shift your mindset to not participate in this pandemic?

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

Karwanna Dyson, She’s Got Goals

Checklist and Resources

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Angela is back on the podcast today! Charlie and Angela sit down to talk about some of the big growth edges they’ve had this year, especially in this crazy year that none of us expected. They talk about some of the changes for Productive Flourishing, as well as the personal changes they’ve discovered and embraced.

Key Takeaways:

[3:30] - Much of this year has been defined by how quickly things can change. There are business changes on the horizon for Productive Flourishing, and the time of Covid has actually provided unexpected opportunities, projects, and growth for the business.

[5:50] - 2020 has been a year of personal transformation for Angela that she could never have imagined. One of the biggest growth edges has been giving herself permission to stand in the light, especially in terms of being seen and heard as a leader.

[7:15] - Another growth edge has also been self-acceptance, and embracing the messy emotions and feelings that are necessary for a full spectrum life. This self-acceptance has happened because of the writing she has been doing with the Anchor project.

[9:27] - As Angela’s growth edge took off with the Anchor, Charlie had his own growth edge in taking a step back and allowing her to lead in this capacity. He has been learning a new balance between leaving space for emotions and keeping things moving forward.

[14:55] - When one partner is shedding and growing around an area in life, both partners have work to do. Now Angela and Charlie are working on how they move forward without one of them having to feel uncomfortable.

[16:30] - Another growth edge has been pulling back some of the many, many hats that Charlie wears as the Founder and main creator of Productive Flourishing. Productive Flourishing has shifted back into start-up mode, and has revealed a lot of what Charlie is doing, and what he can delegate.

[21:30] - Moving forward despite fear has been another growth edge this year. Becoming more comfortable with uncertainty and with not knowing has been important for both Charlie and Angela this year. It’s okay to not have all the answers right now.

[27:30] - Angela talks about another growth edge around receiving and accepting feedback from others.

[32:00] - One of Charlie’s major growth points was around physical health. They talk about their gym project, and switching the mindset of the old way of working out to how they have adapted during COVID.

[38:27] - Angela talks about having to embrace the two parts of herself in a way she hasn’t been able to do consistently before - Academic/Achiever Angela and Goddess/Heart Angela. She is doing the work to embrace and allow both of these aspects of who she is.

[42:18] - What happens when we can integrate these two parts of ourselves? Loving and trusting these different aspects is what allows us to shine brighter.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Productive Flourishing Blog

Productive Flourishing Academy

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

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This week, Charlie is joined by author, teacher, and consultant Nir Eyal to talk about his book “Indistractible,” and how to maintain focus in a world full of distractions. They discuss habits and techniques to gain traction back once it has been lost. Nir posits that willpower is not a finite resource but a mood that comes and goes just like happiness or sadness.

Key Takeaways:

[5:18] - Nir and Charlie discuss how the labels people give to themselves oftentimes prevent them from doing the things that they really want to do; and the second the process of trying becomes difficult, the label is confirmed.

[8:00] - Nir talks about the definition of the word “indistractible,” and how he wanted to replace the negative, self-limiting labels people give to themselves with something that’s positive and helps us stay on track when trying to accomplish our goals.

[12:00] - Nir explains that being distracted is not a character flaw and the way to combat impulsiveness is forethought; putting systems in place ahead of time to deal with distractions.

[20:00] - Nir explains the differences between distraction and traction. Any activity can be traction as long as you’ve made time for it, so there is no need to feel guilty about scrolling through a Slack channel or playing a video game as long as you’ve made a conscious decision to do so.

[27:23] - Charlie brings up the concept of willpower, which was once thought by social scientists to be akin to a muscle that can be fatigued, a limited resource. Nir brings in more recent research that interrogates this idea and comes to the conclusion that willpower is only exhibited in one group of people: those that believe willpower is a limited resource.

[34:15] - Charlie talks about the value of re-focus blocks of time, which are used to recharge your willpower so that you can pursue the task at hand. Nir explains that willpower is simply an emotion; much like we wouldn’t run out of other emotions like angry and sad, we don’t run out of willpower.

[37:10] - Charlie and Nir discuss how the quality of the environment you are in can dramatically change the quality of the work you do and the ability to be indistractible.

[40:21] - Nir challenges the listener to master the uncomfortable emotional states that disrupt your time management and focus; he then invites the listener to check out his website and to download a complimentary companion workbook.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

Indistractible, by Nir Eyal

Nir Eyal

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Executive coach Amiel Handlesman joins Charlie on the show to talk about how we talk to each other. They illuminate the different kinds of conversations we have, and how to navigate them. Amiel talks about different conversational micro-habits that can help improve the quality of our communication, especially during this time when intentional conversation is so important.

Key Takeaways:

[3:30] - Oftentimes, people wait to have conversations because they are afraid of having the conversation wrong. “Naming the conversation”, or type of conversation, can help get everyone on the same page.

[8:18] - Sequencing is just as important as naming the conversation. Amiel talks about three different types of conversations: share stories / assessments, explore possibilities, and then ask / take action.

[14:33] - Having a shared terminology between people really helps to ease frustration and misunderstanding. Naming what you’re doing (for example, “I have a request for you”) defines the roles for the speaker and the listener. It also creates a safe environment for the listener.

[18:20] - Proactive communication is key to navigating and renegotiating commitments, especially in business. Different personality types approach this differently; do what works for you, but it is helpful to practice outside of crucial conversations, so it seems easy in those conversations.

[23:05] - As you’re listening and taking in this advice, lean into the things that make you most uncomfortable - those are the areas of growth! Reflect on whether situations are a strength, stress, or stretch.

[26:55] - Amiel and Charlie talk about the Enneagram test, which serves as a good basis to know the default way in which we interpret our experiences. When we learn about ourselves, there is a permission-giving factor that can be very helpful.

[30:35] - There is a way to create a pause between the initial ask, and saying yes or no. Saying you’ll check your calendar gives you time to weigh everything else on your plate so you can give a firm commitment either way.

[34:50] - Setting boundaries in conversation can bring up difficult and challenging emotions. You want to find a place for these emotions when engaging in conversation, which is part of learning to be competent in conversations. Amiel shares an example of when he had to say no and how he applied this.

[40:50] - As a leader and manager, it’s important to be able to articulate what your emotions are, so your teammates trust and understand where you are coming from and what you mean. This goes for personal relationships as well.

[48:25] - These are skills you have to practice. You may have to go back and clear things up, so you can continue to establish trust in your communication. The way you get better is by repetition with intent to improve, and by having someone observe and provide feedback.

[52:20] - Amiel’s invitation and challenge for listeners is to pick one of the conversations, situations, or habits discussed in this episode and write it down, and see if it’s something you want to make a commitment to for yourself.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

Amiel Handlesman

The Sacred Enneagram, by Christopher Heuertz

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Today’s episode is an interview Charlie gave to the founder of Record the Journey, a non-profit that provides outdoor adventures and photography training to military veterans and their families to make the process of transition easier. Charlie wanted to share this interview to bring light to challenges transitioning veterans face and to amplify Rachael’s great work.

Key Takeaways:

[1:50] - Charlie talks about his history with military service, and how he juggled active duty and working towards his PhD at the same time.

[5:48] - He came back healthy - both mentally and physically, which made the transition back to civilian life a little easier.

[8:02] - Charlie’s experience transitioning back to grad school actually shed light on his own mission. The operating system he was using in the military wasn’t going to help him build his career and life here. It is a different skill set than responding to missions from his commanders and leaders.

[11:30] - Charlie talks about some of the differences between military and civilian life, specifically community and routine. The focus was more single-minded when Charlie was deployed, and coming home, there are a lot of different things to worry about and make time for.

[15:57] - One of the difficult things about making the transition is that how you orient fundamentally to other people changes. One of the main goals of Record the Journey is to share the stories of successful transition with other military members.

[17:10] - One of the adjustments Rachael is making is getting comfortable with the label of being a creative or being an artist. For her, the tension was between being creative and being in active duty, and for Charlie, the tension was actually between being academic and being in active duty.

[21:20] - One of the strengths the military brings into the civilian community is the “can-doisms.” As veterans transition back to the workforce, the focus is more on whether they can or can’t get the job done. This, along with Charlie’s work, helped Rachael take control of her own map and start doing things for herself.

[27:05] - Where many transitioning military members, or civilians, thrive, is when we are intentional about building a squad around us that enables us to do what we do best. This squad or success pack can help get everyone where they need to go, and is often a connection that is missing for veterans transitioning back.

[29:30] - One thing people with no military experience need to understand is that coming back is an identity shift, not just a new job. When you’re in the military, there is an entire culture of who you are that changes when you come out. It is important for civilian society to pay attention to what they can learn from transitioning veterans to improve their communities and organizations.

[31:15] - For any listener, think about the map you’re following, and whether it’s a map or route that you created. When you get off a given route or map, you start finding your way to do your best work. Getting clear about your core values, and giving yourself permission to cultivate those values, can help guide your route.

[37:50] - Especially during this time of COVID, it’s important to make the most of your time. Framing your priorities in a timeline will get things real clear, real fast. If your map is not taking you toward a priority project, figure out why not.

[42:05] - The journey is different for different veterans. For some, it’s a journey making their map, for others, it’s reintegrating, and for some, it’s reconciling who you were before and who you are after your service.

[45:55] - It is easy to get stuck in the heartbreak and mishaps, but when you get away from those moments, you realize that they are an important part of the story. Moving with these moments changes your experience in the moment, in a way that you may not see until later.

[51:15] - Think about your map being written on a white board; if something happens you can change your map. You don’t have to create your map in permanent marker! When you get new information, you can make an adjustment that’s right for you.

[53:20] - The transition back to civilian life is also a challenge for families of service members. Their family becomes their own squad while military members are gone, and it’s an adjustment coming home and figuring out how things have changed and how everyone fits together.

[59:25] - The emotional weight of things doesn’t often line up with the physical transition. The reintegration process is not necessarily linear, and both parties need to give it space to breathe when it comes up, and work through it together.

[1:06:32] - There is nothing wrong with the way the body and the brain deals with these responses. Take time to engage with it - that is how you will move through it. Walls are broken down with words first.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

Record the Journey

Rachael Ridenour on LinkedIn

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Martha Alderson joins Charlie on the show today to talk about her new book, Boundless Creativity. They talk about the key insights of the book, the Universal story, and the importance of making space for creative pursuits during COVID times. There is an overlap between Martha’s ideas and Charlie’s ideas from Start Finishing, so some of these core conversations may resonate in new and different ways.

Key Takeaways:

[1:50] - Martha’s new book takes a mythic and spiritual approach to productivity and getting things done. The opportunity to own her story was a transformative experience she didn’t expect from this venture.

[4:50] - Martha talks about her experiences with her past books and having to silence her creative expression. Boundless Creativity was the first book that she really allowed herself to freely write her true beliefs, with a heavier focus on spirituality.

[8:05] - The climate of today’s culture has opened the doors for more inward reflection, and our purpose here. More and more people are turning to some type of spirituality, and the status quo seems to be shifting.

[12:00] - Martha describes the four parts of the Universal story. The beginning (things are comfortable but fragile, you are enthusiastic about your ideas), the middle (you start to meet the internal and external antagonists, testing ground), the dark night (usually the hardest part of a creative journey, things are stripped away and we lose ourselves), and finally the mastery / triumph (use the skills you learned throughout to overcome final obstacles).

[17:15] - Each time you go through the Universal story, you get stronger and stronger until you are willing to try anything because you know you can. Many of the elements of the Universal story parallel the ideas Charlie explores in Start Finishing.

[24:15] - Each part of the Universal story poses its own challenges. Some people struggle with getting started, and some people get started and want to give up when they get stuck. The middle, or the dark night, is often when past sufferings or traumas come up.

[27:30] - Martha talks about her idea of a “threshold guardian”. When you move into a new phase of the Universal story, don’t make that transition lightly. Value that you’re ready for the next step and the journey you will take moving forward.

[31:00] - Whatever you come up against is just a different part of who you are. A commitment to move forward is a commitment to yourself. These tests and challenges are there to allow us to see just how powerful we really are.

[33:15] - Speaking to or talking about a challenge doesn’t make it any harder than it already is. Talking about it makes it such that you can overcome it. Shine the light on those monsters, and embrace them. What comes out of this journey is the freedom to be yourself.

[38:30] - Many people are having trouble giving themselves the space to dream and be creative during these pandemic times. If you’re feeling this way, take time to look at why you’re feeling this way. Embrace the discomfort.

[43:55] - Allow yourself to accept that it’s okay to take time for yourself. It may not be easy, but it’s worth it. Your needs and desires count just as much as someone else’s.

[47:00] - Martha talks about her own journey confronting her monsters during her writing process. For Boundless Creativity, it was more of an opportunity to put her truth out there for people who will most benefit. Because she had worked through dark nights in the past, she could write this book from a space of freedom.

[52:30] - Martha’s invitation for listeners is to do what you’re most afraid of; whatever it is you’ve held yourself back from, walk into your fear and do it. When you do it, you will see just how strong you really are.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

Boundless Creativity, by Martha Alderson

Martha Alderson

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Today’s guest is Cara Chace, a Pinterest marketing strategist, writer, and social media strategist. While those are her areas of expertise in career, this episode is about integrating creative and analytical thinking in ways that make both better. The real trick is learning which brain is better for the task at hand, and approaching a task with your whole mind. She and Charlie talk about ways to identify patterns and reset when we find ourselves leaning too far to one side.

Key Takeaways:

[2:25] – There is a dichotomy in business and creative work between the analytical side and the more creative side. In Cara’s own career, she has experienced both sides of this spectrum; first as a criminal investigator, and then as a social media manager for MegaDeath. She now works as a Pinterest marketing strategist.

[5:34] – Cara talks about the lens through which creativity is often displayed, especially when she was growing up, and how her view has recently shifted. Pinterest provides a unique combination of both creativity and analysis as the only visual search engine.

[8:20] – It’s easy to define ourselves and others, but confining ourselves to one side of the spectrum shuts us off from the possibility (or reality) that we could be both. Many careers and scenarios require some degree of both analytical thinking and creative approach.

[12:40] – There are also different ways to be good at critical thinking or creative endeavors. When you break down the ideas of left-brain or right-brain for yourself, you can use both to make your life so much better. Cara talks about how she is able to apply this in her position at Pinterest.

[15:05] - Cara shares the moment she realized the integrated mind approach was what would lead her to success. About nine months into starting her business, she started looking at the data of her website traffic, and used that to build her business.

[19:00] - Her default mode is to go to the left-brain analytical side when she is stuck. Recognizing that pattern signals that she needs to pivot, get back into her body, and then let the creativity flow in again. On the flip side, we can get over creative and fail to take action on what needs to be done. It’s important to be aware of where you are on the scale.

[26:05] - Cara talks about using reading as a tool to integrate both sides. This allows her brain to rest and come back more creatively when she gets back to work. Figuring out how to work smarter for better results will give you time and space to fulfill other aspects of your life.

[30:25] - It is easy to let our health, happiness, and joy move to the bottom of the list of what’s important. Practical creatives often overlook those pieces of the equation, and neglect self-care. You don’t have to wait until life and work is in place to start practicing regular self-care.

[34:40] - Everyone experiences the pendulum swing between both sides of the brain. It’s important to be aware of the patterns you get into, and have the tools that will allow you to work with those patterns, rather than against them.

[39:38] - Cara’s two challenges for listeners are: 1. Take social media off your phone for a weekend, 2. Read a book that’s purely for pleasure, and see how much your brain feels reset and relaxed, and what ideas and inspirations come out of that.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

Cara Chace

CliftonStrengths Finder

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Authors Alexandra Jamison and Bob Gower join Charlie on the show today to talk about what it’s like to write a book with your partner. Their book, Radical Alignment, focuses on a four-layered approach to structured conversation, and how they used this approach on the journey to writing this book. They also discuss the application of their method not just in relationships, but also in business and personal life.

Key Takeaways:

[3:10] - Alexandra & Bob talk about the history of this book, and how it evolved from their initial conception. It started as a method they used for themselves and shared in workshops, and grew into something other people were clamoring after.

[5:19] - The method focuses on intentions, concerns, boundaries, and dreams, and is used to ensure everyone is on the same page and empathetic to one another’s reasons for doing something.

[7:50] - Bob talks through how this method grew out of the workshops, and some of the key points of each of the four steps.

[11:49] - One of the most important steps is the last step - dreams. Ending on a high note together, and having that to pull you forward together, allows the couple or group to really feel like a team.

[13:40] - The book is a true convergence of both Alex and Bob’s unique perspectives. This richness comes out in how they talk about bringing more humanity into their teams, and being more strategic personally.

[16:00] - The journey of this book is a testament to all creatives out there with an idea they want to get out into the world. Their self-published book accomplished their initial goals, and had developed in a very natural and organic way. Don’t be afraid to act on your ideas - keep your eyes open for opportunities!

[18:30] - Alex and Bob talk about how they used their own method to talk about writing a book about their method.

[21:30] - The order of the conversation is almost as important as the conversation itself. Addressing concerns in a safe way allows the amygdala to calm down, and you can move forward with confidence in your decisions and creativity.

[23:50] - The goal is not to force alignment. You may find that you do not align on intentions or dreams, and can pursue a different path forward with a project or relationship.

[26:35] - Alex and Bob talk about their creative process, compared to working on separate projects. Using their model allowed complete transparency, and a shared voice emerged.

[31:38] - Bob and Alex talk about the concern around a structured conversation being stifling rather than freeing, and the distinction between etiquette-based conversation and rules-based conversation.

[38:07] - The group discusses the idea of the “missing conversation.” Having structure gives everyone a chance to speak (and listen) and holds all parties accountable for what is said and not said.

[43:20] - Good and productive conversation has been a cornerstone in Alex and Bob’s relationship, and often plays out in their day-to-day interactions as well.

[47:30] - Sometimes we don’t have conversations because we are hung up on the decision we will have to make at the end. The beauty of this approach is that it doesn’t have to lead to a decision; this relieves the pressure of the conversation having to go a certain way.

[50:26] - It is also important to make sure you’re in the right state of mind before approaching these conversations. All three use some form of the HALT principle from the 12-step world.

[55:12] - Alexandra’s challenge for every person who identifies as a woman to use this all-in method for your next important conversation. Bob’s challenge for people who identify like him is to listen more than they speak.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

Radical Alignment, by Alexandra Jamieson and Bob Gower

The Art of Gathering, by Priya Parker

Women, Food, and Desire, by Alexandra Jamieson

Never Split the Difference, by Chris Voss

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Eric Zimmer joins Charlie on the podcast today to talk about spiritual and habitual practices. They talk about the relationship between behavior change and spiritual practices, and why it’s especially important now. They also talk about how to get back on track when you’ve fallen out of your habits and practices.

Key Takeaways:

[2:10] - Eric shares his story about how he got into the realm of behavior and spiritual practices. Out of necessity to get out of his current situation, he had to think more deeply and learn how to live a good life. This started a life-long learning process about how our minds and emotions work.

[5:35] - Eric talks about how his degree of privilege from his upbringing helped him be able to navigate his recovery circumstances. His story, and several others, remind us that these ideas can work for everyone, regardless of where they are starting their journey.

[8:05] - One of the most important aspects Eric has learned over the last six years since starting the podcast is a focus on application rather than learning and epiphanies. In order to be authentic on his podcast, he had to participate in the experiences he was talking about.

[10:30] - Eric talks about the tangible ways that this application has changed his day-to-day routine. As more guests came on his show, there was a focus on spirituality as well as behavior changes and habit-building. His depressions are much more manageable as a result of some of these changes.

[15:10] - The improvements that we make in our lives are driven by the dramatic amount of shift that occurs. The difference is often so dramatic, but we don’t notice because we habituate. This can make spiritual growth a bit difficult because you are always chasing the next high.

[19:25] - Eric has been integrating his work with spiritual practices with behavior changes, called spiritual habits. It takes the science of behavior change and applies it to spiritual life. He talks about some of the most important principles from behavior, and how he has incorporated them into his program.

[23:25] - Charlie and Eric talk about why it’s important to have integrated spiritual practices, especially during this time of pandemic. These practices can help us drop our resistance, and in turn drop our suffering. Focus on the inputs rather than the outputs.

[27:45] - Eric talks about how he’s different when he falls off the “habit horse.” Depending on the habit, he starts to get more irritable, and he is also able to recognize the triggers that might mean he’s falling back into a depression.

[30:52] - It is easier to compartmentalize our spiritual practices from other habits. It’s important to know that your spiritual practice could be your physical exercise, or eating; it is all about the intention you are putting behind it.

[34:28] - With behaviors, Eric shoots for 90% adherence with his clients. If you shoot for 90% day after day and year after year, your life can transform. Shooting for 100% can lead to burn out and quitting. You will likely fall off, but the key is how you get back on.

[39:40] - Charlie and Eric talk about the correlation between effort and follow through. It is a different conversation when you examine the effort put behind a habit for that day, and whether you actually follow through, versus not even getting started.

[42:55] - Eric shares how his practices are helping him overcome his current challenge of adapting to working by himself from home.

[48:10] - Eric’s invitation for listeners is to think about one practice that would improve your mental wellbeing. Start to implement it every day in just a small way. These sorts of practices are more important than ever right now.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

Eric Zimmer, The One You Feed

The One You Feed Podcast

The One You Feed Podcast Episode 300: Getting Things Done with Charlie Gilkey

Triggers, by Marshall Goldsmith

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Charlie sits down with Angela to reflect on this time we’re experiencing in our world with COVID-19, and what life has been like for them and their business. They talk about where they were before the pandemic, and how that set the stage for how they are handling this time. Together, they share their routines, some of the challenges they’ve faced, and what beautiful things have come out of this time that they are going to take with them after this has passed.

Key Takeaways:

[3:00] - Charlie and Angela went to Costa Rica in late February for a retreat. Angela talks about the overwhelming feeling that she needed to participate in the retreat (rather than just Charlie), and how this trip and retreat became an energetic catalyst for a reboot in their lives.

[8:50] - Charlie reflects on some of the parts of himself and the business that they’ve put on hold since about 2015, and two big let-go’s they’ve had recently: the death of their cat and the launch of Charlie’s book.

[13:55] - Jamaica allowed them to fully unplug from day-to-day life in Portland, and re-connect with each other and process their grief from events in 2019. The “hard stops” of Jamaica and Costa Rica allowed them to get some clarity and perspective to be able to get back into their lives.

[17:11] - Charlie and Angela talk about how their recent prior experiences prepared them for the uncertain and uncomfortable times that have hit since mid-March and COVID-19. They’ve looked into their existing material that is actually quite well-suited to this time, and also launched the Daily Anchors. How can we create the best future with what’s right in front of us?

[20:50] - Angela has been writing “Daily Anchors” every business day about what’s going on in their lives and business. It has been an opportunity for her to get back to using her voice to provide support, help, and light in the dark. Her writing practices for herself became things that could also benefit their community, and one of the most beautiful things to come out of the pandemic.

[25:40] - Charlie talks about his current position and the journey he’s on of handing over some of the creative load to other people on the team. About the time they started sharing their resources, a book idea has struck Charlie that feels right to dive into now. At the same time, Start Finishing has been doing incredibly well.

[32:20] - COVID-19 and the stress that it has placed on businesses and teams has really made creative work important. It is pretty remarkable what things have opened up in the way of creativity, and how you can be of support in the world. There are moments and opportunities right in front of us that we didn’t have before.

[37:47] - In addition to creative output, Angela has been managing the finances for Productive Flourishing since the outbreak, through their Payroll Protection Plan. She talks about the anxiety around their business finances, and the reality of trying to secure support from public funding.

[47:10] - Charlie talks about managing fear during this time of Covid, and how we can also focus on what’s going well and what you may have to celebrate during this time. There is an emotional contagion of anxiety and fear, it’s a fine line to walk to provide support and recognize other people’s realities.

[49:55] - One of the biggest challenges for Charlie has been energetic claustrophobia, and not having access to the same spaces he had before Covid. The biggest challenge for Angela was the PPP, and having to shift her yoga practice to remote.

[54:25] - Charlie and Angela talk about how to deal with loved ones not taking as good care of themselves as they should during this time, and perhaps not being cautious enough. This applies not just to physical proximity, but also media consumption. Check in on yourself and others, because we’re still pretty early on in this thing.

[1:00:12] - Charlie and Angela talk about some of the things that have been really helpful for them during this Covid time, primarily music. Non-stressful video games and taking extra time off have also provided an outlet for Charlie.

[1:07:07] - Besides writing, some of the things that have been helpful for Angela have been the convenience of delivery and dropping expectations about herself and her roles and responsibilities (especially as a woman). Leaning into help when it’s available is okay! Nature has also been a balm for her.

[1:12:02] - Despite the hard, there have been many beautiful gifts, revelations, and learnings that they hope to carry with them after we are out of this Covid time. One of the biggest life lessons has been knowing when to hold on and when to let go. It’s also important to keep sight of what you have to look forward to.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

Productive Flourishing Podcast "Year End 2019: Lessons Learned (Episode 212)"

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Jeff Harry is an international speaker and consultant who shows how play enhances problem-solving and innovation. Play is not just childish fun, but can be found in day-to-day work. Charlie and Jeff talk about the hidden objection most people have to play, and ways you can overcome that to invite play into every aspect of your life.

Key Takeaways:

[2:45] - Play is super important, but you have to make time for it, and embrace the perspective. Many people think there should be a breakdown between work and play, but that’s not true. Play is a joyous action where you forget about time, and focus on the process rather than the result. Look for those moments in your work.

[7:05] - Play can also come from being totally immersed in a process, like when you’re in flow and fully present in a task at your work. Try to find more in-the-moment opportunities.

[9:24] - Play looks different for everyone, and oftentimes we don’t notice when we stop finding time for play in our lives. Jeff challenges listeners to remember the last time they had an “all in” moment. A playful mindset is a growth mindset.

[12:37] - Jeff talks about how many corporations and startups are usually in this play space as they are getting started, which is part of what makes them successful. Charlie shares his idea of crock pot creativity versus pressure cooker creativity. The pressure cooker can sometimes stifle creativity.

[16:15] - Charlie and Jeff talk about how sometimes you have to put some kind of timeline on your creativity. Make, create, play - but get it out there because you don’t know what someone else might think of your work. This quarantine is a great time to work on some of your smaller projects.

[18:50] - The “pandemic perfectionist” is the idea of people like they should or have to be doing during this quarantine. You are the only one who can dictate what is right or possible for you during this time. What would you do if there were no right answers?

[22:20] - People don’t allow themselves to play at a deep level because they don’t think they deserve to play. Give yourself permission to play - what if the things you’ve already done in your life were the work? It’s time for you to play! They talk about some activities that might qualify as play in adult life.

[26:08] - They also talk about how it’s easy to feel that other people deserve to play, or rest, but when it comes to ourselves we put the pressure on to work, work, work. Explore with your friends and family what small adventures you could plan during this time, and look for play in the mundane. It’s in any moment that you want if you really explore it.

[31:15] - The productive value of play extends beyond the intrinsic value. Some of the most challenging issues we are facing can be addressed in a creative way. If you want to get creative, you have to get bored. Boredom is where the creativity, the play, and the ideas lie.

[35:40] - It’s also beneficial to step away from your phone or social media. Sometimes that consumption can actually stifle your creativity. Do take time to veg out and relax, but if it’s not actually rejuvenating you, you may need to shift.

[40:05] - People can be in a far more resilient, happy, playful, productive, and successful place when they focus on doing whatever they need to do to chill and recharge. When you’re in a creative space, you are in more control.

[43:51] - In a period of so much uncertainty, what would happen if we just leaned into it? As a people, we have the most evidence to be the most hopeful as a species that we’ve ever had. Charlie shares some of his personal experience with this from his time being deployed.

[50:45] - During this COVID time, people are “locked up” feeling worried about everything that may happen or what we should do. When you’re in a super fearful state, it can be hard to play. Allow yourself to feel this, but at some point, listen to what comes up for you.

[54:25] - Jeff’s invitation for listeners is to allow yourselves to be bored. Don’t consume content or anything that could distract, and listen to what your inner voice is saying. Act on it, and reflect afterwards if it was fun. You’ll be amazed at what you will have made.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

Productive Flourishing Podcast Episode 152: Larry Robertson: How to Explore and Play at Your Creative Edge

Big Magic, by Elizabeth Gilbert

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Today’s guest is Jennifer Louden, author of the new book Why Bother: Discover the Desire for What’s Next. She joins Charlie today to talk about how we can find the spark to engage with and create what’s next for us. If desire is a word you’re uncomfortable with, today’s episode is for you!

Key Takeaways:

[2:15] - Jen talks about her publishing journey, and what aspects of the book make “Why Bother?” her best work yet. This book came from a very different place than her previous work.

[6:05] - One of the major conversations in this book is around desire. It can be a hard word for us, but we all ask the question we think we know the answer to - what are we bothering about? We don’t always have the desire to make a change in regards to a job, relationship, or health.

[9:40] - Sometimes we aren’t saturated with the life or desire to make a decision in the first place. It’s not always a lack of desire for a specific thing, but a general lack of internal desire that prevents change from happening.

[12:45] - Charlie and Jen talk about our complacency during difficult times, like a worldwide pandemic, and how it’s almost more important to give ourselves permission to “get our bother on” even during these times. They talk about some of the struggles creatives may be facing, and ways they can pivot to keep creating.

[17:20] - We have to move our energy and let desire flow through our bodies. If you are having trouble focusing, try quick and short projects rather than some of your more involved projects.

[18:50] - In the book, Jen talks about the two ways we grapple with the question “why bother?” The first is asking like we already know the answer. The other side of the question is genuinely getting curious so you can move forward.

[23:25] - Jen has done some grappling of her own around the release of her book during this pandemic, and reflects on how it can feel when you put something out that’s a huge part of you, and the conditions of the environment aren’t right. She shares some ideas that have brought her comfort.

[29:40] - In the book, Jen shares her model of six different steps to help people take the first step to finding their desire. The first is to leave behind - what are you still holding on to? The second is to ease in - claim your agency again.

[33:30] - The third step is to settle down. We recognize that there can be desire, ambivalence, and difficulties side by side. It’s important to keep things in perspective here, and focus on the small things that accumulate from desire, to wonder, to thriving. The fourth step is desire.

[37:07] - The fifth step is become by doing. The sixth step, being seen, is the one that is most difficult for Jen. She talks about struggling with letting herself be seen, through her books, with her close circle of friends.

[40:15] - We also need to be aware of behaviors that might be enabling our “not bothered” state. Once behaviors are identified, we can also create pivot points to get ourselves out. Having accountability partners in our communities can also be helpful to call us out.

[45:15] - Jen talks about the idea of always beginning again. When we fall off the horse, we can always get back on.

[47:55] - The invitation for listeners is to discover how you can be companioned - so you know you’re not broken, and can dig deeper into what it is that you really desire. Find ways to open yourself and companion yourself so that life can flow again.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

Jennifer Louden

Why Bother?, by Jennifer Louden

The Productive Flourishing Podcast Episode 67: How to Avoid Creative Burnout with Jennifer Louden

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Today’s guest is John Jantsch, author and entrepreneur that specializes in marketing for small businesses. He is on the show today to discuss his new book The Self-Reliant Entrepreneur. He and Charlie discuss the inspiration for his book, including transcendentalist authors of the romantic period. John shares some of his favorite sections from the book, and they discuss how you can use this book to start conversations with others.

Key Takeaways:

[3:40] - John talks about the pivot he made to the subject matter of this book, versus his five other books that focus on marketing. His other books were more “how to” books, and his new book seeks to tackle the “why to” and how to be more self-reliant as a human being.

[7:05] - John and Charlie talk about some of the challenges entrepreneurs face, often in a short amount of time. As entrepreneurs you take on nearly all the responsibilities of a corporate business, but by yourself.

[8:05] - One of the first pillars of self-reliance is resilience, which includes getting out there every day, but also the ability to reframe what has happened and learn from it. The other pillars include trust, courage, curiosity, mindfulness, nonjudgement, and gratitude. It is important to be intentional about applying these pillars.

[10:10] - How we show up and how we respond are two things that entrepreneurs can truly control.

[12:40] - John and Charlie talk about the pay off of practicing things like mindset and self-reliance. This can help you slow down and focus on doing less, but being really intentional about the things that matter.

[15:12] - They talk about some of the counter-cultural ideas that are present now, and how John drew inspiration from some of the transcendentalist literature of the 1800’s. The protagonist was someone who was true to themselves.

[16:35] - John shares some of his favorite parts of his new book, and his process of compiling passages, his own words, and challenges for readers. He shares a passage from the book about being enough in any moment.

[21:05] - One of the biggest challenges for entrepreneurs is comparing themselves to others. Being able to embrace the idea that you are enough now will take you further. This is especially important for people building small businesses.

[23:12] - With self-reliance, you get to decide what is enough for you, in your business ventures and in your life. With that, it is now easier than ever to compare ourselves to others.

[26:15] - John shares some other influential writers and main themes of his book, especially how other people’s opinions are usually born out of their own fears.

[30:50] - A practice of gratitude is important to establish. Charlie and John talk about the neuroscience of gratitude, and how our theories and practices inform what we see in the world. You also have to be grateful for the small things that add up to the sum of what’s being created.

[34:45] - John talks about the particular challenges of writing this book, including the challenges of writing short versus writing long, and all the literature he had to curate to finish the book.

[39:10] - A lot of online entrepreneurs struggle with the idea of overnight success; that’s not always the same path for everyone. The quotes and content of John’s book provide hope and permission to move at your own best.

[43:25] - John talks about the pillar of nonjudgement, and how this was a learning point for him writing the book. Practicing nonjudgement also makes practicing patience much easier.

[46:45] - John’s challenge for listeners is to explore and establish one or two mindfulness practices to keep you grounded in your priorities.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

Clean Email

Duct Tape Marketing

John’s Website

The Self-Reliant Entrepreneur, by John Jantsch

Self-Reliance, Ralph Waldo Emerson

Seasons of the Entrepreneur Blog Post

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Michael Bungay Stanier joins Charlie on the show to talk about his new book, The Advice Trap. His book provides ways leaders can be more mindful of how they are coaching their team. In today’s episode, Michael and Charlie jam about some of the negative effects of falling into the advice trap too quickly. They also discuss patterns and questions to ask to better coach your team, and the best ways to give advice when it’s needed.

Key Takeaways:

[5:50] - Michael shares the backstory to his book, and the default habit we have of responding to any situation by giving advice. The book seeks to end our knee-jerk reaction to always giving advice, often on things we don’t know about.

[7:45] - Charlie and Michael talk about the need for different styles of leadership as a manager. To effectively lead your team, you need to be able to utilize the 6 styles of leadership, and know when to use them. Using the right leadership skills can drive culture and productivity, making life better for you and those around you.

[10:15] - The book focuses on the manager’s impulse to give advice as the default. Michael and Charlie talk about striking a balance between giving advice and giving answers. They discuss some scenarios of how you can evaluate how receptive your team member may be to hearing advice or coaching.

[16:15] - Michaels talks about the three personas of the advice monster: Tell It, Save It, and Control It. Whichever persona relates to you, it is a habitual response. The goal is that as leaders we are making mindful decisions in every situation.

[21:45] - As a leader, one of your main roles is to make decisions. It is your job to wrestle with the tough decisions, and to be mindful about what decisions your team can make on their own. Michael and Charlie also talk about the necessity of sitting on decisions before jumping to your answer.

[29:03] - Charlie and Michael talk about some books they’ve loved recently.

[32:25] - Charlie and Michael talk about some perpetual problems we may encounter in business and relationships. There are some things that are always going to be present in both business and relationships. You have to focus on the good and how you are going to work around those things to keep moving forward.

[36:55] - As a coach or a leader, it’s also important to point out and celebrate what you do well. Then you can encourage your team to apply the good to some other problem areas.

[38:20] - Michael talks about the neuroscience of engagement that he discusses in his book. As a coach or leader, it’s important to learn the neuroscience because it really helps you understand how people work. Michael discusses the basics of the TERA quotient: tribe, expectation, rank, autonomy.

[42:15] - Michael talks about different ways we can influence the TERA quotient when interacting with the people that we lead. If your team knows your coaching habits, you may not be as effective as you could be.

[47:20] - In his book, Michael talks about the 6 foggy fires. All show up pretty regularly, but popcorning and coaching the ghost are two of the most common to be on the lookout for. Charlie and Michael also discuss the four D’s of giving good advice.

[53:40] - Michael’s invitation to listeners is to get on the website and take the questionnaire to identify which advice monster persona is most real for you.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

Clean Email

The Advice Trap Website

The Advice Trap, by Michael Bungay Stanier

The Coaching Habit, by Michael Bungay Stanier

Daniel Goleman on Emotional Intelligence

Primal Leadership, by Daniel Goleman

It Doesn’t Have to be Crazy at Work, by Jason Fried and David Hansson

Every Book is a Startup, by Todd Sattersten

Creative Calling, by Chase Jarvis

Eight Dates, by John M. Gottman, Julie Gottman, and Rachel Carlton Abrams

Catastrophe (Netflix show)

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Today’s guest returns to the show to talk about his new book, The 50 75 100 Solution. Bryan Falchuk shares ideas to create better relationships in his new book, and how his writing process has changed over the course of his two books. This is a great episode for anyone who is looking to better a relationship or understand the journey that many authors experience.

Key Takeaways:

[4:30] - Bryan returns to the show to talk about what has changed since he was last on the show with the release of his first book. Bryan talks about the changes in his professional life, and the inflection points that have helped him navigate these changes.

[7:03] - Bryan’s new book, The 50 75 100 Solution is all about focusing on how we engage with other people, and started with his relationship with his wife.

[9:10] - Bryan talks about how and why he went about writing this new book. It stemmed from shifting his view of his relationship with his wife from what she was doing wrong to how they could both affect different behaviors from each other by presenting different versions of themselves.

[14:04] - When he started applying the ideas from Open Heart, Clear Mind in his own life and with others, his book started to present itself and at that point, he had no choice but to write it. This was different than his first book because he was writing from the middle of the situation, rather than something he had had inside him for a long time.

[18:45] - It is normal for an author’s first book to just flow, and then for them to struggle to start a second book. You often need more time to research and gain new life experiences. Charlie talks about the difference between explanatory and exploratory writing.

[22:55] - The idea of the book is all about proportions or percentage of a relationship. Most people start out at 50/50 which is more “us vs them,” or each person showing up for themselves. 100 is when you’re each trying to make the other 100% better.

[25:22] - 75 is where you have control over three quarters of the situation; this is made up of our actions and our reactions. In a relationship, our reactions are to the other person. Recognizing that you have control over what version you give another person to react to can lead to a virtuous cycle to get things to 100.

[28:16] - “Better” in a relationship doesn’t necessarily mean everything is fine, but it does mean that the situation is resolved to a point where there is less suffering.

[32:30] - We often feel like someone is intentionally doing something to us to erode trust. There is usually something deeper going on there where they believe hurting you gives them more power. It can be hard in these cases to give people a different version of you.

[37:25] - Charlie and Bryan talk about the evolution of the language of apologies, by acknowledging the suffering we may have caused. It’s also important to note your intention (or when something was not your intention).

[40:57] - The book goes through different kinds of relationships and how this strategy might work. Bryan and Charlie talk about how this idea plays out for interactions with children. It focuses on the Buddhist principle of happiness seeking.

[46:55] - Bryan’s strategy ties into the work Charlie and Angela have done around positive boundaries, and making space for people. This can play out in families, in the workplace, and really any relationship.

[52:00] - There is a difference between pain and suffering. Suffering adds the human spiritual element to a situation. This is related to another Buddhist concept of non-attachment. This concept can be very empowering for your life.

[55:20] - Bryan and Charlie talk about the struggle of presenting these Buddhist principles as someone who is not born a Buddhist. The principles Bryan talks about can play out in any type of relationship, but in some situations a different path may be needed.

[1:00:59] - Bryan’s invitation / challenge is to think about a relationship and understand what happiness is at play in the relationship (for both parties), and how you can appeal to both of those needs.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

Clean Email

Productive Flourishing Ep. 184

Do a Day, Bryan Flachuk

The 50 75 100 Solution, Bryan Falchuk

Open Heart, Clear Mind, Thubten Chodron

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Angela joins Charlie on the show today to break down some of the recent events they’ve experienced in this last season of the year, focusing on a recent trip they went on and some lessons they learned from that trip.

Key Takeaways:

[1:35] - Charlie’s new book, Start Finishing: How to Go From Idea to Done is out now! Productivity is how we become our best selves in the world. The book covers tools, practices, and mindsets that will help you finish the stuff your soul is yearning to do. There are contributions from Charlie’s friends, colleagues, and teachers.

[5:35] - One of the huge things that happened for Charlie and the team this year was the launch of his book. That has been a big learning curve and celebration for the whole team at Productive Flourishing. One of the not-great things that happened this year was Angela getting two concussions.

[8:00] - This year they also experienced pregnancy, miscarriage, and the death of their cat. This year was really a year of ups and downs for Charlie and Angela, and the difficulty has been taking in all the emotions as they were happening simultaneously.

[13:15] - They recently took a vacation for joint self-care, so they could heal from the events of the year together. One thing that transformed the trip was setting up boundaries beforehand.

[15:35] - The first lesson they talk about is disconnecting completely from work while they were on their trip. Technology was minimal - each of them break down what technology they brought and used on the trip.

[21:45] - Many of Charlie’s productivity projects have been about solitude, but for Angela, she maintains contact with her phone more often. The days get a lot longer when they’re not stuck to their devices, and it allows more time for the people you love and want to connect with.

[25:05] - The second lesson learned was how much decision fatigue weighs on us, and how much micro-decisions add up. You can enjoy certain types of experiences more when you don’t have to constantly make decisions about different things. This frees up a lot of energy.

[28:25] - They carried this back with them when they got home. Angela talks about the idea that simplicity equals peace. Personally, she’s taken a few steps back from multi-tasking, and putting more singular attention into tasks throughout the day.

[35:33] - One of the big takeaways of simplicity equals peace is that we have a choice. You have to ask yourself how you’re going to get things done, but you can also ask yourself how you want to be while you’re doing work.

[37:30] - Think about one area of your life that’s not quite in alignment for you, and identify something you can change to help increase your productivity.

[38:54] - The third lesson learned is how much control we have over keeping things simple and intentional. Angela talks about some of the frustrations around focusing on one single thing, but also about the increased mindfulness she’s learned from being off her phone more frequently.

[41:45] - The fourth lesson they learned was using structured conversations to reconnect. The book The Eight Dates guided them through eight topics ranging from intimacy and sex to conflict and disagreement. Having the joint commitment to walk through the book helped them reconnect in a really powerful way.

[46:20] - This vacation was one of the best gifts they have given themselves. The lessons learned and disconnecting from the rest of the world made all the difference in how they were able to connect.

[48:10] - These lessons can be applied to your day-to-day or holiday activities coming up at the end of the year. Think about what it might be like to disconnect and be present during this season. How can you lower decision fatigue and make this season simpler? What structured conversations could you have with the people around you?

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

Clean Email

Blog Post on Miscarriage Story

Eight Dates, by John and Julie Gottman

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Today’s guest is Erin Pheil, founder of the MindFix Group. She joins Charlie to jam about why it’s so hard to rewrite stories and change self-sabotaging scripts. They also talk about some things you can do when you’re tired of the same choices leading to the same actions.

Key Takeaways:

[0:05] - Charlie’s new book, Start Finishing: How to Go From Idea to Done is out now! Productivity is how we become our best selves in the world. The book covers tools, practices, and mindsets that will help you finish the stuff your soul is yearning to do. There are contributions from Charlie’s friends, colleagues, and teachers. If you’d like to pre-order a copy, click the link below.

[4:00] - Erin ran a successful web agency for almost seventeen years, until she realized that it wasn’t something she wanted to do for the rest of her life. The fear around this thought was that her career was all she had ever known. After a series of rock bottoms, she started to see a therapist who showed her that the way she was looking at the world and seeing things was affecting everything else.

[8:05] - She devoted all of her energy into learning how she could actually change what was going on in her head. When it became replicable, she realized this work was what she wanted to be doing. Our operating beliefs are the ones that are doing the driving, and tend to be the ones that drive our self-sabotage.

[11:25] - Emotion drives action, and the language we use to describe things actually becomes the way we see and operate in the world. The stories, or head trash, tends to dominate. The piece of head trash impacts how events occur to us. This is the same principle as confirmation bias.

[15:10] - People often struggle with what their “true” or “authentic” selves are. Different people can have different truths, and maybe the more important question is asking "what’s useful?" That can get us much further than “what’s true?”

[17:50] - One of the most frustrating things about head trash is that we often realize the story we’re telling ourselves, and we know it’s not useful, but it’s difficult to change it. People hold on to these beliefs or stories because they feel like they have seen evidence in the world that it is true.

[20:20] - In addition to our own stories, our cultures also have stories that become part of our mental narrative as evidence. When we have a belief that already has some evidence, every new bit of evidence that confirms the belief strengthens it, and we easily write off anything that doesn’t confirm it.

[23:20] - The body keeps the score with all of our stories and head trash, and this can eventually manifest itself physically. Erin talks about some of the tests they use with their clients, and one of them is whether or not they can feel something in their bodies when they have those thoughts.

[26:40] - People must learn to accept that it’s okay to have conflicting beliefs. They only accept one, and when they don’t acknowledge that they feel a certain way, they tend to suppress those beliefs or push them away. It takes energy to push things away, and when we accept them, sometimes the power dissolves.

[31:20] - There is a connection between the body and the mind, but there are also some disanalogies that keep us stuck. It’s not quite as obvious when we push away mental beliefs versus physical manifestation.

[32:55] - Erin talks about our beliefs and stories surrounding what’s possible with change. Our stories can anchor us down and prevent us from seeing our other successes.

[36:45] - When it comes to goal setting with contradictory beliefs, Charlie talks about changing the directive. Instead of saying you can or can’t lose that weight or save that money, remain open and change the directive to “what would happen if I…” This curiosity is a useful tool to uncover what people’s specific head trash is.

[41:40] - The work of uprooting head trash is daily work, because there are new things that pop up when we get rid of one thing. If it feels like there are other beliefs sprouting up, what you think you got rid of may not have been the root of the problem.

[44:30] - The first step to getting unstuck from self-sabotage stories is to identify and uncover what the roots of our head trash are. Step two is dissolving and eliminating them, which is the main work of MindFix. The million dollar question for people to start asking themselves is “What would I have to believe to be true in order to keep experiencing this pattern over and over again?”

[47:45] - Erin invites listeners to seriously ask themselves that million dollar question above, at least ten times a day. It is one of the most insightful questions that will help you learn about yourself in a short amount of time. Ask yourself that question and see what shows up.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

The MindFix Group

The Metaphors We Live By, George Lakoff and Mark Johnson

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As the release date for the book draws nearer, Charlie reflects on the ups and downs of the journey of this book. Angela joins Charlie on the podcast to ask some questions about the book. In this episode, Charlie shares some of the ideas and dichotomies around productivity, and how his book seeks to help people understand productivity in a new light. This episode is sure to get you excited about reading the book yourself - there is something in it for everyone.

Key Takeaways:

[0:05] - Charlie’s new book, Start Finishing: How to Go From Idea to Done will be released on September 24th, 2019. Productivity is how we become our best selves in the world. The book covers tools, practices, and mindsets that will help you finish the stuff your soul is yearning to do. There are contributions from Charlie’s friends, colleagues, and teachers. If you’d like to pre-order a copy, click the link below.

[4:35] - Angela has played an active role in Charlie’s writing process. She inspires his writing and they both have been readers of each other’s work for a long time. After reading the completed manuscript, Angela was surprised at how much the book resonated with her, since she’s been engaged in Charlie’s work almost as long as he has.

[8:10] - Part of the joy surrounding how the book develops is writing for some specific people. These early people support you and can also give you feedback as the book comes together.

[9:20] - The book is much more than a productivity book; it seeks to guide our productivity from the heart and the soul. What sets this book apart is the scope of people it has been able to reach, even before its release. The productivity space hasn’t always been accessible to all people, especially those who are underdogs.

[13:15] - We need to talk as much about the work of lives as we do about the life of our work. The talk in society often talks about economic work, which is the centerpoint of everyone’s life. Women are often left out of this conversation, due to sometimes having to prioritize others’ needs before their own.

[14:50] - Productivity started as a means of increasing the amount of yield from workers. It has transformed to us figuring out how we are going to get everything done that we need to - relationships, ourselves, finances, health, and all the different things we have to take care of in addition to economic work.

[16:15] - A project is anything that takes time, energy, and attention to see through. In that context, all the stuff in our life is a project. Once we can step away from that overwhelming feeling of all the projects we’re juggling, we can figure out how to work through and solve that overload.

[19:05] - “Work” is a four-letter word that is sometimes associated with other words that we want to avoid and get away from. We’ve gotten to a point where we want to do less work, except for our “best work.” This is work that benefits us and others when we do it; we want to do more of this type of work.

[21:15] - Talking about doing the work we are called to do can sometimes seem selfish. Charlie seeks to shift the conversation to highlight that other people tend to benefit from our best work. Our best work is uniquely ours - this is important to remember because it can keep you going when you’re in a low place. The projects that fuel our best work are easily displaced by other people’s projects - be careful when saying yes to short-term work from others, even when that can be scary.

[24:45] - Sometimes your best work may not be in the same line as your economic work. There is honor in doing your economic work that serves you and your family (bills, well-being, etc), but this displaces the time we have to focus on our best work. We may not always be able to find an economic outlet for our best work, but that is okay. Just because you can’t get paid to do it, doesn’t mean it’s not worth doing.

[27:15] - We almost all have some wasted time that we can steal to work on our best work. For some this is recovery time, but we should think about whether it is serving us more than other things, like spending time with our families, playing music, etc. Once you determine your priorities, stop beating yourself up about the things you aren’t doing.

[28:40] - Michelle Jones is the founder of the Wayfinding Academy. She is an example of someone who used their economic work to inspire a pivot into their best work. Look for ways you can shift aspects of your economic work to do it in a way that only you can, that transforms it from merely economic work to something that’s got your fingerprint on it.

[31:35] - Another aspect of the book focuses on the support system around us that can help us create things in the world. It’s hard to do your best work alone. A success pack is a pack of people that you put around yourself specifically for projects, and for our lives in general.

[34:50] - People you don’t want in your success pack: naysayers and derailers. Naysayers are the ones who hate on you, whether it’s about you or about your project or about a grudge they hold. We spend too much time trying to please our naysayers. Derailers are people who may be well-meaning, but their commentary about your work discourages you. They often are loved ones, but it can take too much energy to incorporate them into the success pack of your project.

[38:15] - Focus on your yaysayers. These are the people who have your back, and when you talk about your project, they ask you about how you’re going to be successful, not whether you will be. They know and realize your potential, often before you do. There are four types of yaysayers: guides, peers, supporters, and beneficiaries.

[43:25] - People usually want to get more guides on their projects, but Charlie encourages people to find more beneficiaries for their projects. When you get stuck, you can ask the person that you’re building it for. It can also help fuel you when you’re emotionally stuck because you remember that it’s not all about you.

[46:25] - The more a project matters to you, the more you’re going to thrash with it. If it doesn’t call up longing and frustration, it’s probably not your best work. The reason this work matters so much is because we’ve most closely tied our identities to these projects. If we’re not successful, what does that mean about who we are?

[49:25] - Many of us have internalized that if it’s our best work, it should be easy. This is a myth! We get good at something by doing it, and anything worth doing is worth doing badly at the beginning.

[52:00] - Angela talks about some of the different roles and people Charlie has been in his past: growing up in the South in a poor biracial family, an Eagle Scout, a military leader, a philosopher, a spiritual person. As he was writing, whatever came up came out. Sometimes different aspects of his background came through in certain parts.

[59:15] - This book is a productivity book, but it’s also a personal development book. It’s a book about family, and a book about spirituality. It’s a book about everything that makes us thrive as people. The process has been incredibly humbling for Charlie, especially with all the contributors. Through this book, Charlie hopes that people see that there is a lot of goodness and abundance around us, and that we have to do the work to harness it.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

What If Women Cared About Productivity

Wayfinding Academy

Michelle Jones on LinkedIn

SaneBox

Sounds True

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Mark Nepo returns to the show as today’s guest to talk about his new book, Drinking From the River of Light: The Life of Expression. Charlie and Mark talk about why it’s so important that we express ourselves, the tensions we live in as we seek to express ourselves as creative people, how we are more likely to be Renaissance souls, and what thrashing inner work is really telling us. Both Mark and Charlie share some of their creative process, to hopefully inspire your own.

Key Takeaways:

[0:05] - Charlie’s new book, Start Finishing: How to Go From Idea to Done will be released on September 24th, 2019. Productivity is how we become our best selves in the world. The book covers tools, practices, and mindsets that will help you finish the stuff your soul is yearning to do. There are contributions from Charlie’s friends, colleagues, and teachers.

[5:30] - The inspiration for Mark’s new book actually came from a workshop he created. The book explores the deeper need that we all have to develop a personal form of expression. He likens it to the heart needing to breathe. There is an inhalation, and our exhalation is some sort of creative expression that can be any passion project.

[8:15] - Mark had the outline of the workshop around while finishing up some other books, and began to combine this outline with the stories and materials he had from other artists and teachers. The key to getting everything together was listening to the material, rather than imposing his will upon it. This compliments Elizabeth Gilbert’s thoughts on how ideas find people, and if they are ready for the idea, it sticks around. If not, ideas move on to something else.

[13:05] - Mark shares how his experience with cancer in his 30’s changed his understanding of art and expression. Everyone has their own wisdom, but we often create from a space of what we need to learn.

[15:50] - Mark and Charlie talk about the dichotomies of success and failure in creative work, and how it compares to other environments, like sports. We put a lot of pressure on ourselves in our creative expression, expecting to be able to hit it every time. Unless we open up to those vulnerabilities, there’s no growing.

[18:58] - The spiritual life, the philosophical life, and the creative life are all about sitting in tension with two contradictory truths at the same time. We can’t be stuck in the mindset of hit or miss while creating our work, but when we’re finished, this is often the first thing we evaluate. We need to have dreams, goals, and ambitions; we need these things to get us to what we can’t even foresee.

[24:05] - A theme for Mark and Charlie is that as they create, they are being created. The tension lies in not knowing what will manifest until it manifests, even if we think we know. Charlie would write down anything that came up, in case it was blocking something else that needed to come out. Mark talks about some of his own creative process, and how research on a topic can lead to the creation of a whole new book or story.

[28:45] - We often discover material rather invent it. This requires us to surrender some control and open ourselves up to allow that discovery. Virtue is our tendency toward unity, and the creative process is about discovering the connections that are always present even when we are unaware of it. The reward for this is that we then become one and can achieve unity.

[34:45] - In his new book, Mark utilizes poetry as a tool for expression. For him, poetry is the unexpected utterance of the soul, rather than a manipulation of words. Everyone can be a poet; discover your own vibrant link to the truth of what it is to be here.

[38:23] - Mark talks about poet/artist William Blake, and the connection between his poems and his visual art. Expression can come to us in many ways, and some artists’ most important work can be classified as an unexpected medium from what we usually think.

[40:55] - Everybody has the same starting point and access to gifts. Everyone is a Renaissance soul; outside pressures generally dictate that we need to become a specialist at any given craft. Everyone’s aliveness is connected to their attendant spirit.

[44:05] - The value of our consciousness is that we can gain insight and wisdom so we don’t have to relearn or re-invent tasks. It can create assumptions and conclusions, but expression allows for us to release those assumptions and conclusions so our consciousness is fresh. What comes through during this process is the unexpected utterance of the soul.

[47:40] - In his book, Charlie talks about the pain of not creating or finishing what matters as creative constipation. If you’re experiencing frustration because you can’t achieve this clarity, there may just be some things you need to get out in order to allow that. Writer’s block often indicates that we need need to clear things out to be present again, rather than not having anything to say. In these times, Mark seeks out an experience of something new.

[50:43] - What oftens stops us up is the legion of preferences we accumulate in our minds. This can close us off from experiencing new things. The shadow of consciousness is self-consciousness; seek out the prompts that are heartening and avoid those that are disheartening.

[53:40] - It’s important to notice our behavior and trace it back. In his book Charlie talks about thrashing, and how we begin to recognize our behavior when we’re thrashing, and how we can catch and correct it. Sometimes when things seem too easy, it may be an indication that we are stuck, much like salmon swimming upstream.

[58:20] - Mark talks about his process of working on multiple books at one time. Leaving the subject matter of one and researching the other can sometimes form ideas for the original book. Thrashing is a sign that we are doing something that matters.

[1:00:55] - Mark celebrates the end of a project usually in a quiet, reflective state. Having now written over 20 books, Mark knows his tendencies. For him, one of the most transformative moments in the life of a work is the retrieval of the first draft. The joy in expression comes when we’re in the verb, as opposed to the noun.

[1:06:25] - Mark has two invitations for listeners. The first is for listeners to come on a journey with him - visit the website linked below for information on the different opportunities Mark will be offering in the coming year. His second invitation, whether you feel you’re an artist or not, is to try to practice in the next week a way that you perceive you inhale with your heart, and exhale with your expression. What does that look like in your life?

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

Mark’s Website

Drinking from the River of Light: The Light of Expression, by Mark Nepo

Productive Flourishing Episode 201: Mark Nepo: More Together Than Alone

Sounds True - Waking Up The World

Big Magic, by Elizabeth Gilbert

SaneBox

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Today’s guest is Bobby Herrera, co-founder and CEO of the Populus Group, an army veteran, and the author of The Gift of Struggle. He joins Charlie to talk about the power of sharing your stories of struggle with your team and those around you. Listen to hear how Bobby changed his stories of struggle, and how you can convert yours from something that keeps you from being successful to the gift that it is.

Key Takeaways:

[0:05] - Charlie’s new book, Start Finishing: How to Go From Idea to Done will be released on September 24th, 2019. The book shares tools, practices, and mindsets that will help you finish the stuff your soul is yearning to do. There are contributions from Charlie’s friends, colleagues, and teachers.

[4:20] - Bobby’s book, The Gift of Struggle, is a parable/story-style book, that seeks to understand the gift of struggle. He wrote this book to give others permission to lead the way they want to without fear or doubt of struggling along the way.

[8:25] - Writing the book wasn’t something Bobby necessarily planned to do. He’s a story-teller by nature, and as he started speaking to veterans and telling stories to kids, he was encouraged to write them out in a book. It has opened up opportunities to connect with others, and guide others in a way he wasn’t in his own leadership journey.

[10:10] - Being able to share the stories through live story-telling is a much different engagement than when it is written down. Bobby gets fulfillment from the way people are responding and sharing their own experiences of how they’re applying what they’ve learned in the book.

[11:50] - Bobby shares the story of Dr. Joe, and how he helped navigate his first macro-level leadership position. In a feedback session with Dr. Joe, he helped Bobby identify who he needed to learn from, and what it meant to be a real student.

[15:00] - In the book, Bobby also shares the story about his demotion. As a result of the demotion, he did some self-reflection on the choices he was making, who he was learning from, and how he was learning. He wasn’t taking advantage of the resources he had access to around him. This was one of the most important lessons he has learned in his leadership journey.

[17:10] - Asking for help, and asking the right people for help, is incredibly important to help you move forward. In our journeys of struggle, we often ask for the easy help, rather than asking for help from the people who will help us grow. We have to take ownership of our part, and realize the control we have over our situations.

[20:30] - You don’t have to have come from a certain background to be in a position of power. While that is a reality in some situations, it doesn’t have to be. The most important part of leadership is seeing and encouraging potential.

[22:25] - During a Q&A with some students in Seattle, a student asked Bobby how he was able to overcome the boundaries created by color. He shares the story of how he called the student up to race, and the moment he had a breakthrough. The race to the top (of our own stories) isn’t about who is beside us, it’s about running, and running a second faster each time. The things around us aren’t holding us down as much as we think they are.

[27:00] - We all struggle. Every struggle teaches us something, and that’s a gift. Leadership is sharing that gift, though it’s not a chronological journey. The book is structured so that each chapter asks questions that readers can apply to their journey, wherever they are at that time.

[30:25] - The essence of leadership is that you can’t start changing other people until you change yourself.

[31:335] - Telling your own stories can be very difficult. One of the hardest stories Bobby shares in the book is a story about his son. When writing the book, he wanted to use the power of story to provoke thought and reflection in the reader, so they could make connections to their own stories.

[35:40] - Leadership, creativity, and doing the work that matters is messy business. “The mud” is where the work happens. It doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong. Too often, we smother the struggle, when there is actually so much empowerment in the struggle.

[38:50] - Bobby’s time in the military helped him frame some of the struggles he faced growing up in an economically disadvantaged family. It gave him a rigor and discipline that wasn’t always there. Resilience, discipline, and tenacity are all learnable traits. Anything worth being good at, is worth being bad at the beginning.

[42:15] - One of the biggest mistakes Bobby made starting his company was not sharing his story at the beginning. Once he was able to share his story, it transformed his company into a community. Sharing his story humanized him. Don’t make this same mistake! Let people know the invisible force that drives you.

[44:50] - There were several stories that didn’t make the final draft of his book. As with leadership, one of the most important parts of the editing process is choosing what you want to focus on. In this book, he wanted to focus on leadership.

[46:35] - Bobby’s invitation for listeners is to think about who you want your story to matter to when the time comes for it to settle. Reflect on this, because at the end of the day, that’s what really matters. Every choice that you make and how you choose to lead will have a direct impact on that.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Start Finishing, by Charlie Gilkey

Bobby Herrera

The Gift of Struggle: Life-Changing Lessons About Leading, by Bobby Herrera

The Populus Group

SaneBox

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On today’s episode, Charlie talks with Andrea Owen, author of “How to Stop Feeling Like Shit: 14 Habits That Are Holding You Back from Happiness.” She joins Charlie for a more personal episode, as they tackle topics like their fitness journeys, shame stories around needing to get help, and how communities help enable growth but can also create obstacles.

Key Takeaways:

[3:30] - When you’re in a position where you are helping other people work on their work, it can be really difficult to focus on and allow yourself to work on your own work.

[5:10] - Andrea always had a good relationship with fitness, but eventually experienced burnout from running. After her dad passed away, she stopped working out and exercising. In the process of getting back to that, she had to change her focus to working out to take care of her health, rather than for vanity reasons.

[7:20] - The perceptions surrounding physicality and social pressure can make it hard to stay true to the decision you’ve made for yourself. Charlie and Andrea both talk about how they observed other people in their circles during their fitness journeys, and feeling the weight of the “should.”

[10:25] - For Charlie, his struggles came from not feeling like his body was his, and that his fitness habits weren’t congruent with who he was. On top of that, he has been focusing on writing his book which put him on a different schedule with different priorities.

[14:05] - One of the big influences for Charlie to get things back on track was integrity; while sharing his book, he wanted to make sure he was portraying the reality that even though there is a lot going on, you have to prioritize your health too. Andrea had a similar shift in focusing on vitality and owning her body as it is.

[17:55] - You don’t want to unintentionally shame people who are happy with their body and their habits, but you can also help influence people who aren’t happy where they are and want to take steps to change.

[20:10] - Another shame story comes from being someone who helps people, but having to hire someone to help you. Andrea is part of a couple of mastermind groups, and also hired someone to discuss sex with, which can be a bit of a taboo topic in our culture.

[26:30] - For women, so much of their creativity is in their womb. So much of how they show up in the world is tied to that topic. The second chakra is also tied to sexuality and creativity.

[29:00] - Charlie hired a personal trainer and there was some shame around that, even though he knew it’s what he needed to hold himself accountable to getting it done. What he was most worried about was that he would love it, and it wouldn’t be sustainable.

[34:00] - Even though it’s hard, it’s better if we can lean in and enjoy the process. Life is hard enough; we don’t need to make it harder if we can help it. A version of getting the help that you need is an option for a lot of people. Asking for help is a pattern that shows up across many different areas of our lives.

[36:05] - Being in a community is a great way to give yourself some accountability. Doing stuff with other people makes the activities better. While virtual relationships and accountability is great, having local community and asking for local help can be especially beneficial.

[42:25] - Andrea’s invitation for listeners is to think about where you can show up more in your community - it doesn’t have to be the community where you live, but the circle of people you trust. Don’t be afraid to share your feelings, and ask for what you really need in those moments. Do this in romantic relationships as well.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

SaneBox

Andrea Owen

Books by Andrea Owen

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Author of eight books now, Cynthia Morris joins Charlie for a second time to talk about her new book, The Busy Woman’s Guide to Writing a World-Changing Book. She and Charlie talk about how writing a book is empowering, why busy women have different challenges with writing books that are often overlooked, plus the top three challenges people face when it’s time to start writing their book.

Key Takeaways:

[2:00] - Part of Cynthia’s work is coaching writers, and through this, she witnessed many of her students’ profound moments. Her hunger for helping other people experience this urged her to write this book for them. Being able to share stories helps to normalize the playing field for authors facing similar challenges.

[6:00] - In her teaching, Cynthia seeks to help people craft a writing practice that is consistent and sustainable for them over time.

[7:40] - Her new book is geared toward women because that is the audience she knows. The book is concise and to the point, and also considers the schedule of women who run their households, have jobs, or maybe run a business. Cynthia also hopes this will help women reclaim their power.

[10:40] - Writing a book helps you reclaim power because you’re saying that you matter, your idea matters, and your book matters. You start gaining confidence as you hit your stride, and you start to own the integrity of doing what you said you would do. The works we make work us; we are made by what we make.

[14:20] - Cynthia shares the top three challenges people face when writing a book. 1) People stay in the planning time for a long time before they’re ready to start. While this is an exciting stage, it’s easy to get stuck here. Dive in and go forward even if you don’t know everything. 2) Do your best to thrive in the discomfort of pulling your ideas together. 3) Make time, focus, and space to write. Maybe you need to remove something from your schedule to make that space.

[18:00] - Speaking to the last point, Charlie talks about making writing a project. You may have to displace something else to give your book the time it needs. It’s not just physical space, but also emotional and mental space. You can also add in elements of project management.

[21:30] - How you react when you face some of the challenges is what defines you as a person and a writer. When the challenges arise, you can choose if you want to let them get you down or power through. You might learn things about yourself you didn’t know before.

[25:30] - A large part of Cynthia’s coaching focuses on who you are and how you are in the world.. Are you of a growth mindset or a fixed mindset? Sometimes we don’t want to take on projects because they will reveal things we’d rather not face. Projects can be a mirror and a bridge.

[27:30] - Another challenge about writing, or art making in general, is you have to really care about the subject. You need a deep motivation, but on the other hand, the risks can become higher because it’s so important to you. Keep yourself grounded by seeking the benefits for yourself throughout the process.

[30:05] - Writing itself is a slow medium; there is a lot involved in carving out what you want to say. Some people may write quicker than others, but it’s okay if it takes you time, not just to write, but also to achieve the success you want to achieve. Show up to do what you can and the rest will come.

[35:55] - There’s no way to learn how to write a book without doing it. It’s humbling when people share their challenges and how they’ve overcome them through their own process.

[37:45] - There is explanatory and exploratory writing. In explanatory writing, you just need to figure out how to explain what you already know. In exploratory writing, you often don’t know what you think or haven’t figured it out yet, and as you write, you work through that. Writing can reveal so much to us, and often we are the ones getting in our own way. If you want to write a book, try it! There is so much to learn from the process.

[41:15] - There is always room for more writers. The first world that’s going to change when you write is your own; when your world changes, it will ripple out.

[42:00] - Cynthia’s invitation is to do a free-write. Take 10 or 15 minutes to write on the prompt “I must write this book because…” and that will reveal to you what’s important to you in writing this book, or it might be a realization that it’s not as important to you and will free you up for other things.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Cynthia Morris, Original Impulse

The Busy Woman’s Guide to Writing a World-Changing Book, by Cynthia Morris

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Sebastian Marshall joins Charlie on the podcast today to talk about productivity from a different perspective. Sebastian is the co-founder of Ultraworking, a company building technology to help people hit flow states and peak performance more often in their work. He and Charlie talk about peak performance, and how the path to peak performance often requires focus on areas outside your work.

Key Takeaways:

[1:45] - Sebastian and his co-founder worked together on various nonprofit and education ventures before starting their company. They were both interested in how different companies and people doing the same work performed differently, and how they could measure quality and reliable work. Today, in their business, they focus on three main things: 1) reliable effectiveness 2) frequent flow states and 3) rapid recovery.

[6:25] - Having a flexible productivity system helps these three points, especially the rapid recovery. This allows you to continue with productivity, even if something happens that gets you off track. We want to be able to operate even when our context doesn’t match the system we’ve built to do reliable work.

[8:40] - People don’t often think about or model statistical base rates out in the world. We don’t typically plan time for things to go wrong. Sebastian shares some research that indicates we should give 80% of our capacity each day. This gives us a reserve that we can use if something comes up and still allows us to get our work done, and also provides some built in slack that we can use if needed.

[14:00] - The 80% mark requires that everyone be really good at what they do. This may not be the maximum optimization for new companies; it may be a goal to work towards.

[15:30] - Sebastian recommends following up big tasks with an enjoyable project, rather than stacking big projects back to back to back. This helps you use the time you have more effectively, and often people move more quickly through their big projects with the luxury end goal on the horizon. It’s also important to plan time for transitions between projects, so you can unwind and evaluate a project before moving on to the next one. You can also use this transition time to clean, archive, and trash.

[22:00] - Taking time to cleanse after a project sets you up for the next project, and also allows you to re-recruit your body and catch up to the process and project you’ve just finished. The recovery process for our minds is similar to our recovery processes for our bodies, and should be treated as such.

[26:10] - A lot of the cognitive work that we do is actually done in places outside of our brain. The body is part of a greater matrix of effectiveness and energy that it takes to do our best work. We need times that we’re not at 100% to hit the highest level of output.

[27:20] - There are a lot of connections between biochemistry and productivity that can explain how things happening to us outside of our work can affect us while we’re in our work. For an example, this is especially true for caffeine. Making biochemistry changes seem harder in the moment, but if you accept that it doesn’t have to be harder, it can actually make things a lot better.

[32:20] - There is a distinction between the meta skill of behavior change, and the particular behavior change you want to implement. For example, when people try to clean up their diet, they often start by trying to cut out what they enjoy most. Instead, Sebastian started slowly eliminating the lowest things on his list that he used to eat. This built up the meta skill of quitting and separated it from actually quitting individual behaviors. You can gradually set up the systems and skills for quitting behaviors, and then use them to tackle the harder things.

[37:05] - Everyone has an activity they like to do that’s a waste based upon their preferences and priorities. Eliminating them with the slow-quit method will help you with control and free you up to focus on other things.

[40:05] - We can be hardcoreabout one thing at a time. If you want to be super hardcore, you have to be paying a lot of attention to the changes. If you’re regularly having conflict, you probably aren’t going to be able to effectively develop a habit. The same is true for our productivity systems. You can have one or two habits that you’re hardcore about, but everything else needs to be free.

[43:55] - To help behavior changes, you can make the cost of not doing something higher than the cost of doing it, or the reverse. When you’re first trying something new, you have to be clear about whether the discomfort you’re feeling is the discomfort of change, or whether it’s discomfort of being out of values or principles.

[46:20] - Sebastian combats this discomfort by doing some fairly intense monthly planning. He focuses on one theme or one core idea each month, and can anticipate pressure in this area. The time period of a month is usually a good indication about whether it’s something worth continuing or whether you need to tweak something to make it more effective.

[51:50] - If you surround yourself with other people who are committed to getting a lot out of life, they can help hold you accountable for the goals you set for yourself. Other top performers who see you as a top performer will help you get there and stay there, or help you grow in your practices.

[55:25] - If you’re looking for other people like this, you may have to get out and put yourself in situations where these people interact. Sebastian gives some tips for people who are looking to surround themselves with other top performers. You can ask for advice, and then follow up after you’ve given it a try. You will build up a reputation as someone who asks smart questions and tries out suggestions. People look out for people who are doing stuff.

[1:00:25] - Sebastian’s invitation/ challenge for listeners is to go set a monthly theme for next month. Give it a name, almost like a mantra. Build some supporting policies around your theme, and run hard on it. If you do it, let Sebastian know how it went!

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Work at 85% Capacity with 100% Focus, by Charlie Gilkey

The Goal, by Eliyahu Goldratt

Ultraworking

Monthly Planner

Email Sebastian Marshall

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Paul Jarvis joins Charlie on the show today to talk about the ideas in his new book, Company of One. Some of the things they discuss are why we should question business growth, how having an upper limit in our business growth creates sanity and durability, and the relationship between intentionally keeping our businesses too small to fail, and playing it small.

Key Takeaways:

[2:40] - Paul’s new book is about the mindset and philosophy around business, rather than a one-person business like the title might suggest. The book came about as he was formulating his ideas about questioning growth. Several people related to his ideas, and the book was chosen as the medium as the best way to teach what he had to share.

[8:11] - With the release of the book came a round of several interviews. Paul was able to use the content from these interviews to launch a podcast. Charlie and Paul talk about what makes a good interview, and how it’s especially important that all parties involved are engaged. This will make it interesting and engaging for listeners.

[10:45] - A “company of one” is a company that questions growth. The thesis of Paul’s book is not necessarily that growth is bad, but that it should have some critical thought put into it before deciding whether or not to proceed with it.

[11:15] - One of the big discussions in the book is upper bounds. Paul argues that there can be such a thing as too much growth. When we get caught up in trying to run our business in a way that we think it should be run, we lose sight of why we are running our business. Our choices should be driven by what will allow you to serve your target audience better.

[13:45] - Aristotle thought business was the only thing that seemed to want to grow infinitely. It often works this way, but it’s not necessarily that it does. Growth is required at the start, and we assume that’s always going to be the case. Paul’s view is that companies should grow to their organic natural size and no further.

[19:05] - When you want to grow your business, the important question to ask is why. Businesses should make people and the planet better, and if that’s not happening, what’s the point?

[20:10] - One of the strategies Paul talks about in his book is limiting the amount of capital and investment you need to get to minimum profitability. One of the risks here is that you don’t have enough product to fulfill demand. This amount is different for every company.

[24:05] - With any type of growth, you have to think about how it would serve your business, how it would serve your customers, and how it would affect your life. Every decision we make in our business has a related decision in other parts of our lives.

[26:05] - Investors are seeing that there are win-wins and ways to be profitable at a middle ground. If we can learn to love sustained growth over the long-term, that really changes the game. Chasing growth has actually caused some businesses to fail because they didn’t scale to expectations.

[31:35] - One of the reasons Paul wrote his book is for people who want to start a business but don’t resonate with the large-scale model. It would be a shame if they didn’t pursue their business because of that. It is important to make it work for you.

[33:45] - There is a difference between the mindset of playing small and running a business that’s too small to fail. The difference is between self-doubt and building something that’s durable. If you don’t want to proceed simply out of fear or self-confidence, that is a bad reason to not proceed. But if you want to run a small business, it’s important to consider what is enough in your business and also what you want your work life to look like.

[38:00] - There are no answers in the book, but there are ways to think about the problems that you’re having in your business (or the business you want to have). The book presents a wealth of questions to ask ourselves to get to the right answers for each of us individually.

[40:05] - Paul’s challenge for listeners is to think about these three questions in your own life or business: 1. How much is enough? 2. How will I know when I reach it? 3. What will change if I do?

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Paul Jarvis

Company of One: Why Staying Small Is the Next Big Thing for Business, by Paul Jarvis

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Dr. Samantha Brody is a licensed naturopathic physician and acupuncturist. She joins Charlie on the show today to talk about her book Overcoming Overwhelm: Dismantling Stress From the Inside Out. In today’s episode, they talk about more expansive ways that overwhelm may be showing up, as well as some underappreciated considerations about the relationships between our values and overwhelm, compartmentalizing, and our individualized paces of change.

Key Takeaways:

[1:50] – “Overwhelm” is a word we use a lot, but Dr. Samantha’s definition is more comprehensive: it is the point at which what we’re experiencing is more than we can handle, and we have a response to it in one way or another. Our responses are individualized based on history, genetic disposition, and our worldview.

[4:20] – The sense or experience of overwhelm is the most important thing to get under control in order to help people feel better, whether emotionally or physically. By coming at it from the perspective of what’s most important to us, we have extra room to absorb stress and do the work we need to do.

[7:00] – Naturopathic medicine is all about looking at the whole organism and our lives in totality, and then identifying the root cause of our symptoms. If we try to solve our problems on the surface, they will likely pop up elsewhere in a different form.

[9:58] – There is a relationship between our values and overwhelm. The first step in the process of overcoming overwhelm is figuring out what is most important to us. When we’re not clear about this, we end up making choices that align with someone else’s values rather than our own. Our values, how we want to feel, and what we want to accomplish is our True North, or what we’re trying to move toward.

[13:15] – When we choose what to do and what not to do, it takes away some shame and discomfort, because we’re prioritizing right in the moment. When we misfire, we can figure out what didn’t work and why. We don’t have to shame or guilt, but continuing to work toward making choices for ourselves where we have control over the decisions can help to manage overwhelm.

[17:58] – One of the big sources of overwhelm for a lot of people is that they don’t give themselves the opportunity to not be superhuman. Sometimes our priorities have to shift from our normal behavior to something that allows us to breathe. Overwhelm can come not because of what’s actually happening, but the story we’re telling ourselves about what is happening to us, and how we react to it.

[21:35] – Sometimes not seeing a decision through can cause overwhelm. A lot of people get stuck after making a decision and taking action that solidifies that decision. A helpful exercise is to identify what you can change, what you can’t change, and what you’re going to choose not to change.

[24:45] – At some point, overwhelm becomes overload. We are each born with a different ability to handle stress (our bucket). Our buckets fill up with different things in some general categories: environmental stress, nutritional stress, insufficiencies, financial stress, cultural stress, and health stress. In each of those categories, there are different stresses that impact us individually.

[27:02] – Once our bucket is full, it overflows and we feel overwhelmed, and our weak spot is going to be exploited. We are able to decrease our overall load by identifying the things we have control over, and acting on the things that will have the most impact with the least amount of effort.

[29:15] – Everyone has a different way that they make change best and how they approach change. Some people like to tackle the small things first, and others like to solve the big issues first. You have to be honest with yourself about what works best for you.

[32:20] – We’re generally not very good at time scale shifts. This contributes to overwhelm because we often look at our lists of what needs to get done and collapse it to right now. We have to consider our list and relate it to a certain chunk of time that is attainable.

[35:15] – Part of the holistic approach is that sometimes, to go forward in one way, you have to go 90 degrees a different way to solve the problem.

[36:23] – One of the other main ideas in the book is that you can’t fail at self-care. Taking care of ourselves is a process, and no one way is right. If you’re unable to implement something, it either means it’s the wrong thing or maybe we need more support.

[39:02] – Sometimes we have to approach self-care as an experiment; we try something and see what happens. If what we tried doesn’t work, it’s a learning opportunity to figure out something different. This removes the pass/fail stigma.

[40:05] – If you’re already overloaded, adding something new is so much harder. We have to make the effort to identify what’s most important, and what we can remove from our bucket that’s not serving us. We have the space to really experiment and hopefully come up with a solution.

[41:45] – Dr. Samantha’s challenge is to take some time to really look at what your values are. Get clear about that one thing that is going to help you make choices that will get you toward what’s most important for you in your life.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Dr. Samantha Brody

Overcoming Overwhelm, by Samantha Brody

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Seth Godin returns to the show to talk to Charlie about his new book, This is Marketing: You Can’t Be Seen Until You Learn to See. They discuss how Seth defines marketing, how changing the wording of your marketing can make a huge impact, and how to measure what’s working in your marketing. Seth also talks about what it was like to be invited to join an organization he was thrown out of a few years back.

Key Takeaways:

[2:20] - When Seth was first on the show, he had talked about writing a marketing book. The last marketing book that Seth published was 10 years ago. He had started a marketing seminar, and was inspired to bring it to people as a book.

[4:05] - We’re in a revolutionary time where everything we know about marketing is completely new, but we’re still talking about marketing like the old way. The book is meant to be a relic that can be shared and discussed with others.

[5:55] - Seth was invited back to the Direct Marketing Association after he was kicked out for testifying against spam. It was nice, but the reason Seth does his work is to inspire others with his ideas and give them something to engage with.

[7:24] - Books are the foundation of our intellectual life. In an age of podcasts and online courses, books are a physical reminder of the knowledge contained inside. Seth makes the comment that his online courses seem to have a deeper impact on people than his books, but his books allow him to scale the number of people he reaches.

[9:40] - Marketers make changes - if you are bringing change to a community by hoping that people will hear your story and change their behavior, you’re a marketer. It is not all about advertising; it has to do with your posture in a community as someone who does work that matters for people who care. Seth redefines marketing as work we do to change our culture.

[10:55] - One simple word change can greatly impact your marketing. Instead of thinking of people as prospects, change that to “students”. Marketing then becomes about generosity, and how you can help the student get to where they want to go. This includes being open about what is best for the student - even if it’s someone else’s product - as well as invites awareness to how you can continue to evolve your product.

[13:50] - When it comes to artists’ marketing, you have to really think about what you’re selling. Artists aren’t typically just selling a painting; they are selling tension, emotion and status. It is a change that comes when your painting shifts from a hobby to a business. The ideas in the book are similar for non-profits.

[16:30] - Once you realize that you are a teacher and a guide, your calling can become more clear. As creatives and businessmen, it’s our job to get our work to the people who need it. You also have to be confident enough in your product that you feel comfortable charging for it.

[18:50] - Emotional labor and passion are related, as are authenticity and vulnerability. However, you have to be aware of how you are channeling these things into your product. As a professional, you have to show up even when you don’t feel like it; you have to be consistent in bringing emotional labor to the table.

[20:30] - Marketers need to talk less and do more. Generally marketers aren’t allowed to do, and the doers aren’t allowed to market. As marketers, we need to be in charge of customer service, the supply chain, finances, and product development - all of these things are marketing!

[22:24] - Digital sharecropping is a social media pattern that makes you cease to be the customer and now you are the product. The platform will try to sell you. Seth describes how he manages his social media platform to avoid digital sharecropping but still reach his audience.

[26:10] - Be careful about how you’re using your media and your marketing. There is a difference between conversion media and connection media, and there is a difference between direct marketing and brand marketing. Direct marketing is measurable; you wouldn’t want to try to measure your brand marketing. There is a distinct difference.

[30:30] - To build trust, you have to make promises and keep them. To build trust in your insight and wisdom is to have authority. We gain authority by describing our worldview to others and having it resonate. So for a podcast like Charlie’s, he is able to reach people with his own ideas and that’s how he influences his other product. For Seth, his podcast allows him to reach people on another axis of influence (in addition to his blog).

[33:10] - For a while, there was a group of people who felt like they needed to hustle, and they asserted that that is what Seth was also doing. That’s not his aim - he would continue to write and produce his podcast even if no one read them. He wrote them to share them with people he cared about.

[35:06] - For many authors, as soon as a book is finished they realize things they wished they would’ve included. For Seth, he is very happy with the result of his book.

[36:40] - Seth’s hope for readers is that upon finishing the book, they will feel responsible and empowered. The easiest way to begin is to make your audience smaller; this is the biggest and most instantaneous shift presented in the book.

[37:45] - Seth’s invitation for listeners: find people who do what you do. Sit down with a small group and tell each other the truth about your marketing. He presents some questions and discussion topics that you could present as a useful step forward.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Seth Godin

This is Marketing: You Can’t Be Seen Until You Learn To See, by Seth Godin

Marketing Seminar

Akimbo (A Podcast from Seth Godin)

Productive Flourishing Episode 3: Pick Yourself with Seth Godin

To Sell Is Human, by Daniel Pink

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Author, poet, and teacher Mark Nepo joins Charlie on the show today to talk about the power of true community. Throughout this episode, Mark talks about how community manifests itself in his new book, More Together than Alone. The book talks about eight worldviews and practices we can apply to our lives. He challenges us to think about how we might incorporate some of these worldview practices into our own lives.

Key Takeaways:

[1:50] - Mark is about to release his 20th book. Over the last ten or so years, his life of poetry and the poetry of life have blurred, and his books have become the trail of his life journey. For him, writing is about listening and taking notes - he follows his stories, his struggles, his confusions, and his questions.

[5:15] - Process is about introspection and transformation. When we can bring all of who we are to a moment, we allow ourselves to be instructed. If we can stay with that moment (often one of discomfort), that’s where we are informed, enlightened, and transformed.

[8:25] - Our heart is the strongest muscle we have. It is most sensitive when it’s working well.

[10:35] - Moderation is about balance, and staying present in the middle of all things. We center our experience, and when it comes to our daily lives, our soul’s awakening is our career, and where that happens is our occupation. Our engagements in life bring us alive, and they bring us together.

[13:50] - Mark’s new book, More Together Than Alone, is all about community. He was inspired by the community he experienced in the treatment and waiting rooms during his own cancer journey. He began researching moments in history when we have worked well together cross-culturally. He began to notice the trends over time, and talks about some specific events in history where the reaction to someone who was different had very negative consequences.

[18:50] - When we encounter someone who is different from us, our actions speak louder than words. If we use the opportunities to learn something new from another person, it could help solidify and strengthen our sense of community with people we maybe didn’t realize were a part of our community.

[20:18] - One key thing to remember is that we are more than what happens to us (more than our actions). Oftentimes, during negative experiences, that is how we choose to see all things. One thing that happens when we’re afraid is that we make our fear and our pain a worldview.

[23:20] - In the book, Mark discusses eight worldviews and practices that we can personalize to help us recognize that we are more together than alone. The first is from the Native American tradition, and it’s the notion of all my relations - we recognize that family is what matters. In the Native American tradition, this includes everything in the universe. The practice that goes along with this worldview is to discover, name, and repair the connections that exist between all things.

[25:07] - From the African tradition, he talks about Ubuntu, which means a person is a person through other people. “We are because of each other.” The practice here is to water our common roots. In nature, a good metaphor for community are aspen groves - above ground they are individual trees, but underground they share one root system.

[26:52] - The third worldview comes from the Hindu tradition, “Thou art that.” This implies that at the heart of things, we are the same. The practice is to feel a life of compassion that honors how we are the same.

[28:07] - The next worldview comes from the Jewish tradition, and it is the “I, Thou” relationship - everything is a living center unto itself. When we honor that in others, and bring our lives to it, then the unrehearsed dialogue of God appears. Our practice is here is learning how to stay committed to honest conversation.

[29:35] - The fifth worldview comes from the Lebanese tradition,”Ya ah uni,” which means “oh, my eyes. Now we can see together.” The idea is that we need each other to see, and welcome other beliefs other than our own. The practice encourages us to be open to other people’s thoughts and ideas about the world.

[30:40] - The next worldview comes from the desert mystic fathers from the early Christian tradition: the wagon wheel. There are three parts to a wagon wheel - the hub, the spokes, and the rim. This worldview suggests that all souls on Earth are a spoke on that wheel, and as we live our lives, no two spokes occupy the same space on the rim. Our unique gifts and talents hold up the community (rim). As we go deeper into ourselves, towards the hub, we all meet in the middle. The Christian tradition says the hub is God. The practice here is to learn how we live out our uniqueness and commonness in the world.

[32:21] - The second to last worldview is the Danish tradition of Hygge, which translates to comfort. The practice is hospitality, and welcoming strangers as well as friends.

[32:42] - The final tradition comes from African bushmen, and is the tradition of greeting. When someone from the tribe returns from hunting and gathering, someone from the village calls out “I see you,” and the person returning says “I am here.” The practice with this worldview is to bear witness to each other, and affirm each other.

[33:45] - The important aspect of all of these worldviews is figuring out how we can personalize them for ourselves, and fit into the world with others. Mark discusses a parable of two monks, and the open-ended choice at the end of the parable speaks to what kind of world we’re living. If we insist on keeping our appointment (whatever it is) over opening our heart and working with what we’re given, we’re leaning toward cruelty.

[38:13] - Working for what we want is an apprenticeship for working with what we’re given. In that action, that’s where our greatness reveals itself. We are often able to give more than we think we can give. This applies not only to others, but also to ourselves.

[40:05] - In his thirty or so years of writing, one thing became clear across all stories and traditions. When difficulty, pain and fear make us think that self-interest will protect us, love and suffering affirm that we’re more together than alone. Another thing that was affirmed is that the people who have given the most throughout history are the people who have the least.

[44:05] - We gain wisdom from our direct experience, but if that’s all we rely on, we’re in trouble. We have to allow ourselves to also receive and learn from the experiences of others. Those two together is at the heart of community.

[46:55] – At the end of the book, there is a picture of a blind boy. It was taken by a WW2 photographer, and it was a small boy from Italy who was not only blind but also had lost both of his arms. The picture is of the boy learning to read Braille with his lips. On the surface, it’s a very sad image, but when you stay with it longer, it is at the heart of resilience. No matter what’s taken away, we’ll read with our lips, and continue to learn.

[49:05] – We can all identify as all of the people in the photograph, including the photographer that made it come alive. We are all of these things, and wisdom supports us on this journey through life and community. As we go through life, we are working to make sure there is one more healthy soul in the world than unhealthy, so we can speak to the health of humanity.

[52:00] – Mark’s invitation and challenge for listeners is to affirm our humanity and our oneness every day. Find one way each day to do that, whatever it might be. Be aware of who is around you, and help them so we can move forward together.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Mark Nepo

More Together Than Alone, by Mark Nepo

Things That Join the Sea and the Sky, by Mark Nepo

The Book of Awakening, by Mark Nepo

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Angela joins Charlie on the episode today to share a special announcement. Along with their announcements, they discuss the seasons of change in our work and projects, and how you know if it’s time to take a break.

Key Takeaways:

[1:15] - The podcast is going on a season break between Season 4 and Season 5. Charlie and Angela have been doing the podcast for nearly four years now, and have decided to focus their energies on some new projects.

[4:18] - When they were discussing the break, Charlie and Angela were talking about the seasons of life, the seasons of business, and the seasons of projects. While the podcast is a great project, it’s important for them to prioritize what they need to.

[6:25] - Running a weekly podcast is a lot of work, and they have been reflecting on what that work displaces in other areas of their business. Charlie will be spending his time, energy, and attention on his book.

[8:20] - Charlie and Angela wanted to talk about the thought process behind their break because many of us might have a project we’ve been working on and it might be time to go on a break or take some time off to focus on something else. If you do have a project like this, think about what you could do to take a break and recharge and reassess, and think about when a good time to do that would be.

[10:00] - The important thing to consider when a project really matters to you is, are you giving it your all or are you just sort of skating by? Is the project you’re working on still the priority, and should it be?

[11:52] - Before you take a break, celebrate what you’ve done and what you’ve created. This is their 200th episode for the podcast, and they’ve had at least 500,000 downloads, and have had 125 to 150 different guests on the podcast.

[13:30] - Don’t worry, the show isn’t done! There are great guests lined up for Season 5, and they are planning some different directions the show is going to take.

[14:52] - Charlie’s challenge for this episode is to think about what you might be doing that may benefit from a break, or some way for you to take a step back, celebrate what you’ve done, and come back to the project with renewed excitement and energy.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Favorite Episodes

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Today’s guest joins us on the show for the fourth time. Susan Piver is the New York Times best-selling author of eight books, and the founder of The Open Heart Project, a completely virtual meditation center. Today, she and Charlie discuss the four noble truths of love, which is also the title of her new book. They also talk about how to minimize the suffering and discomfort that are part of all relationships.

Key Takeaways:

[2:40] - Susan’s new book is The Four Noble Truths of Love. This book presents a teaching that Susan made up, rather than her previous books that present Buddhist teachings.

[5:15] - The four noble truths of love are based on the four noble truths in Buddhism, and reconfigured to apply to intimate relationships. The core of the book is about how to sustain relationships and give love. It is about the action of relationships.

[8:10] - A relationship and a love affair are not the same thing. We assume our love affairs will turn into relationships, and our relationships will remain love affairs; unfortunately, this isn’t always the case. It’s important to identify which one you and your partner are doing, and not apply the same rules and expectations to both.

[10:10] - The four noble truths in Buddhism are: 1) “The Truth” - Life is suffering. 2) “The Cause of Suffering” - Pretending that the first noble truth is not true. 3) “The Sensation of Suffering” - Now that you know what you’re doing to cause suffering, you can stop it. 4) The Eightfold Path - Eight things you do every day to bring about sensation of suffering.

[12:00] - When Susan applied these four noble truths to her love life, she came up with her own four noble truths of love: 1) Relationships are uncomfortable - They never stabilize. 2) Thinking that relationships should be comfortable and stable is actually what causes more discomfort and instability than anything else. 3) Meeting that discomfort and instability together is love. 4) Three steps to achieve finding this love.

[16:05] - Often in relationships we expect things to go a certain way, and when they don’t, that is where the suffering comes from. They don’t have to be big things; the day to day things can cause a tremendous amount of irritation. It’s important to notice these things, and pay attention to the suffering without making it more powerful than it is.

[21:22] - What is most frightening to another person in a relationship is when we sense unconsciousness on the part of our partner. Mindfulness is key. The more awareness we can express, the better, especially about things you know your partner cares about.

[28:05] - When the small things start to build up and become too much, that’s when we can return to the four noble truths of love. The closer we are with someone, the more our lives mix, and the less we are able to see them. The way we talk to ourselves mixes with the way we talk to the other person. And the person we love most often hears this voice as much as we do ourselves. The more you can espouse a kind voice in the way you talk to yourself, the more it will be heard by your partner as well.

[30:35] - Charlie talks about the idea of how we form superorganisms in tight relationships. Meditation and mindfulness can be a reminder that we are our own beings with our own separate ways. The key thing to develop is awareness on three levels: you, your partner, and the both of you together (me, you, us).

[36:50] - Buddhism is a doing/ practicing religion. In her book The Four Noble Truths of Love, Susan applied this to five steps to development and the eightfold path of love. The five steps are a way to develop confidence. Susan translated them into how they can apply to two people. The five steps are: 1) Clean up your room. 2) Eat good food/Share food today. 3) Pay attention to the way you look. 4) Spend more time together with people who you like and who like you. 5) Spend time together in the natural world. Doing these five things helps build a container for love that attracts love.

[45:55] - The fourth noble truth of love has three components. The first type of qualities are foundational qualities (good manners and honesty). The second type of quality is called openness (the other person has equal importance to yourself in your relationship). The third quality is going beyond conventional view (look at all that happens between you and your partner as a way to deepen intimacy).

[48:30] - Susan’s invitation/ challenge for listeners is to experience your deepest longings for love without a storyline attached to them. Just feel the longing; the longing is good.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Susan Piver

The Four Noble Truths of Love, Susan Piver

Other episodes with Susan:

Productive Flourishing Podcast Episode 4: Become More Mindful with Susan Piver

Productive Flourishing Podcast Episode 54: Demystifying Meditation with Susan Piver

Productive Flourishing Podcast Episode 149: Susan Piver: How Mindfulness Helps You Become More Creative

When, by Dan Pink

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Liz is the founder and CEO of Sseko Designs, an ethical fashion brand that works to educate and empower women around the world. She joins Charlie on the show today to talk about how and why her brand started with employing high-potential women from Uganda, and what it does today for every woman in the Sseko network.

Key Takeaways:

[2:30] - Liz went to journalism school, and while there, she became interested in issues facing women and girls who were living in areas of extreme poverty and post-conflict zones. She moved to Uganda, and discovered a unique issue facing women there. During a transition period in their schooling, they had to return to their villages where they were competing for jobs with men in the village, and they also lost a lot of social support to continue on to University. In response to this problem, Liz started Sseko.

[5:03] - She committed to three young women that if they made her sandals for the next three months, they would get to university in the fall. When she decided she was going to start a sponsorship-based non-profit charity, her research shifted her focus to something that was more about sustainability, job creation, and contributing to the export market. She tried a few other business ideas, and sandals worked. At the start of her business, Liz wasn’t really passionate about the business side, but over the course of her career, the business aspects have become something that fuels her.

[8:45] - When starting her business, an important thing was recognizing the abundance of resources in both the United States and Uganda. For Liz, it was a two-way street between the material resources available in the US, and young people in need of a job in Uganda. What good businesses and marketplaces do well is come together to combine their resources to create something sustainable and mutually beneficial.

[10:35] - Liz and Charlie talk about American culture, and the idea of building up the economies in these developing countries rather than exporting their labor and resources elsewhere. One of the most beneficial human interactions is one that’s mutually respectful. What Liz is trying to do with Sseko is create mutually beneficial relationships, from trade to the relationships between the people who work for the company.

[12:50] - Liz talks about how the journey in Africa of empowering women to be equal partners in the marketplace compares to the journey we’ve been on in the US. The two journeys are pretty similar, and it all comes down to a power dynamic. There is a belief that the more women are empowered, engaged, and lifted up, the less power men will have. This is a false dichotomy. The challenges women are facing in East Africa are more dramatic and obvious than the challenges women in the US are facing. Liz talks about some of these real challenges that the women of Sseko face during the nine months they go back to their villages before University.

[18:55] - Liz talks about their business model. Rather than a portion of the profits going to the women, they are a paid a monthly salary based on what they do and what their job is within the company. This salary would be about 2-3 times more than the proposed minimum wage in Uganda.

[21:30] - At the original conception of her venture, Liz was very against it being a business (rather than a charity). She felt that most businesses contributed to a system where people were divided by who was privileged and who was oppressed. Liz didn’t want to be involved in that system, but when she got to Uganda, she realized that the tool of capitalism in the marketplace in business was amoral. It’s about how you do it, the decisions you make, and the spirit in which you do those things that can contribute to a system that creates mutually beneficial relationships.

[24:50] - Though there are many businesses and business people that abuse the system, there are many more, like Liz, who use their business to create good in the world. For Liz, it was when she was in Uganda and thinking about her specific goals with her project that she realized her goals meant starting a business. Her model is capitalism for good.

[27:45] - Liz’s biggest personal challenge as an entrepreneur is focus. Liz often finds herself bending the rules and going after the exception without realizing the cost on the overall mission. Her team helps keep her check and maintain focus so they are able to continue to help the most amount of people.

[31:30] - The biggest challenge on the business side has been being a vertically integrated company. They currently run two different models - a manufacturing company and a sales/ distribution marketing company. These companies require different finance models, ways of running, and types of employees. So far, it’s a worthy challenge they are continuing to pursue. Charlie and Liz talk about what would have to happen for Sseko to reconsider this model.

[35:50] - What does the future of retail look like? This is something that Liz has become interested in over the past few years. At Sseko, they shifted their model to be a direct sales model (women become spokespeople for their brands in their own communities and sell the product in their communities), as retail has moved away from brick and mortar to something more personal and social. E-commerce is taking over, but that takes away some of the experiential side of retail. Their direct sales model creates an engaging and community-oriented way of shopping. It’s almost like the future of retail is going back to the past.

[41:52] - The direct sales model for Sseko specifically means that a purchase will help a woman in Uganda go to college, but also helps support the family of the woman in your community you bought a pair of sandals or a purse from. When we realize we’re all creators and makers and we all can contribute, then we start to break down the idea that we can’t buy or sell stuff to our friends.

[43:10] - Liz’s invitation to listeners is to join Sseko; if you’re interested in being an entrepreneur, you can be a part of their community of dreamers, doers, and impact entrepreneurs. If you already have a product, think about how you can make an impact on your local community and in the global community.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Productive Flourishing Podcast Episode 81: Changing the World, One Toilet at a Time with Jasmine Burton

Sseko Designs

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Today’s guest is an avid runner, and part of a group that has run marathons on all 7 continents (yes, even Antarctica!). He joins Charlie today to talk about running these marathons, and the different and important lessons he learned on each continent. On the surface, the conversation is about marathons, but Charlie and Mike are really discussing the inner and outer journey of committing to a big goal, and what happens when you do.

Key Takeaways:

[2:15] – Mike grew up running, but was diagnosed with diabetes at age 30, and he started to get health-conscious. During the recession when he took a pay cut, Mike gave up golf and took up running.

[4:10] – He joined a team and started training, and ran his first marathon in Cleveland, Ohio. His job position came with a lot of travel, and along the way he got connected with other people who were also runners. After he ran his first race abroad in the Netherlands, he fell in love with travelling and running. From then, he would work to schedule meetings and races in the same trip.

[6:15] – Each continent was a different experience for Mike. In North America, at the Detroit Marathon, his big lesson was about family – no one will support you like your family.

His lesson from the marathon in South America was that if you live with optimism, you can accomplish so much more than you think you can, just by having the right attitude and perspective of the world around you.

The marathon in Africa was probably the most influential. The race he ran was part of the Tusk Charity, and during the work around the race, the lesson was that everyone has gratitude inside them, and it’s important to find it and express it.

The lesson from Asia was that you need a team of professionals to get you to the finish line. There’s no reason that you can’t call upon the expertise of others to help you reach your goal.

At the London Marathon in Europe, his big takeaway was that you can be successful. And when you are successful, you can give in abundance.

He brought his daughter to his race in Australia, and was reminded that creating memories with your children and bonding with them is so important. Life moves fast, but you have to find the time to connect with your children.

Finally in Antarctica, he learned the most important lesson. The training for this race was particularly hard, and so was the race. He was working with his doctor throughout this time, and it turned out he had a blockage in one of his arteries. This was a wake-up call for his health, and coming out on the other side of this was one of the best things that has happened to him.

[15:45] – Running marathons on 7 different continents certainly represents a lot of dedication. This dedication translates to many other aspects of Mike’s life, especially his career. Marathons have been a different outlet and goal for Mike, and it’s something that takes a lot of time to train for. You always have to be looking at that next step in the progression to reach your goal.

[18:30] – When running becomes part of your lifestyle, and you’re serious about your goals, the people around you start to become supportive. For Mike, as he started progressing through his goal, his coworkers started to back his progress and he was able to get the time off he needed to travel to run. He would also try to organize smaller runs for workers at the plants he would visit for business, and it got a lot of people interested in getting out to exercise.

[21:40] – Mike experienced some injuries during the course of running these races, and did have to alter some plans to accommodate injuries. Mike never had doubts about accomplishing his goal of running all 7 marathons, but he did have to be flexible and attentive to his own needs to stay safe. What matters is that you keep moving forward even when things don’t go as planned.

[23:35] – While today’s conversation is about running specifically, it is also applicable to much of the creative work we do in our lives. Some days we’re in it, and some days there are things that get in the way of making the progress we want. We may waver on goals if we’re not sure it’s something we’re going to accomplish. For Mike, once he stated his goal out loud, he knew he was going to do it. For him, the doubt would have come between the time he had the idea and telling the first person. Having a big goal helped him stay motivated.

[27:25] – The race in Antarctica was the most difficult. The journey there was difficult, the course itself was tedious and monotonous, and the weather was not favorable. The reward and experience was well worth it; that was his 7th race so he received his 7 continents medal. The race he enjoyed the most was the one in Australia with his daughter.

[31:55] – His most transformative run was his marathon in Africa, for many different reasons. The race itself was on a preserve, and he got a new appreciation for the importance of keeping those animals around. They also visited some schoolhouses, which was quite a humbling experience for Mike.

[36:10] - The time after the 7 races were run was pretty difficult. There was celebration, but he also had his health scare. He had some procedures done for his arteries, but wasn’t prepared for the time after the surgery. The recovery was more difficult, and his medication had negative side effects. Mike used this opportunity to advocate for himself (and others) and to make some big changes to his lifestyle to ensure he would continue to be healthy.

[42:25] - Sometimes, we may experience post-accomplishment depression after we achieve a big goal. Now that Mike has achieved the goal of running the 7 marathons, he’s looking for the next big goal. He would like to reach people through his story, and hopefully help some people who can benefit from his experiences.

[44:05] - Mike is thinking his new big goal will be completing all 6 major marathons (London, Tokyo, Berlin, New York, Chicago, and Boston). Other than that, he’s continuing to work and travel and enjoy himself.

[46:03] - Mike’s challenge for listeners is to do something that isn’t health-oriented, but rather a mentorship challenge. Mentorship is one of the most important things we can do. Find someone to mentor, and teach them to be a mentor. The only way you can sustain a model where mentorship is successful is if you teach people to be mentors.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Mike Silvio

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On today’s episode, Angela sits down with Charlie to talk about debt. As they come to the end of this podcast season, they wanted to share some of the conversations they’ve had in their household as well as with their clients. We can think of debt as how much money we owe others, or economic debt, but the focus of today’s podcast is other types of debt that can weigh us down. Charlie and Angela talk about how debt in one area of our lives can affect all other areas, and getting over the shame can help us move forward into abundance.

Key Takeaways:

[3:00] - One of the conversations Charlie and Angela have been having lately is about debt. There are other forms of debt that weigh us down just the same as financial or economic debt. If you’re behind on a project, you might be in project debt. Just like with financial debt, it’s hard to get ahead because you’re trying to pay off the project debt while being presented with new tasks or projects. You can get stuck in a cycle of not making headway on the debt you already have, but also not saying no to new debt going forward.

[4:50] - Bankruptcy can be a helpful term to apply to other kinds of debt, besides financial debt. If you’re presented with a lot of great opportunities you’re unable to engage with because of project debt from the past, you might call bankruptcy on that project and just let it be done. It’s not always an easy decision to make, but it’s important to listen to how our desires, energy, and focus evolve over time.

[7:00] - The idea of debt and bankruptcy is an interesting concept when you start applying it to different areas of your life. There are many areas in life that we get behind and we’re not getting what we need. At this point, you have to stop and evaluate what it’s costing you to move forward in your current path.

[8:15] - A lot of times, there is an emotional cost to owning a project. When you’re getting the project done, it can fuel you. On the flip side, when no progress is being made, it can be emotionally draining. Having a project that you’re not working on creates interest that you continually have to pay until you discharge it.

[9:35] - There is some shame associated with project debt. It may be true that the way we manage our time and priorities leaves us in debt. However, that doesn’t have to be a source of shame. Once we get past the shame story, we can move into a time of recovery.

[13:35] - It’s easy to let the debt in one area of our lives show up in every other area of our lives. Angela talks about how when she’s experiencing sleep debt, she is usually also experiencing project debt and relationship debt. This goes back to the idea Charlie mentioned earlier about symbiosis, and the idea that different parts of our lives can start to support each other.

[17:15] - Charlie talks about the Greek nature of nemeses, and how our nemesis comes when we refuse to accept our limit. Until we embrace and work with that limit, our nemesis will always show up, because we’ve likely borrowed from other reserves in our lives. We need to take care of ourselves, because we can’t go all out all the time. Most creative people have some type of meditation practice that grounds them. If you can make 15 minutes of a meditation practice a priority, you can make other things a priority too.

[22:10] - Often times we are aware that we have too much going on, but we can’t let it go. Really looking internally to figure out your priorities is a way to begin to let go. You might have debts that you’ve taken on, but may come to realize that you don’t have to pay and see them through.

[23:40] - We get into debts because we don’t recognize our limits. We all have limits, and we cannot be, do, and have it all. It’s up to us to determine what those limits are in the different areas of our lives. When you give yourself permission to not be everything, you can work on finding your authentic core and make sure that’s how you’re showing up in your relationships.

[27:15] - There isn’t enough time and energy for everything, but there is enough time and energy for the things that matter. We let the fear of missing out push us past our limits, and end up missing out on those things that matter most. The beauty of debt is that when you embrace debt, you can also embrace surplus at the same time.

[30:15] - Wrapping our minds around the idea of limits can be saddening in some ways, and exciting and exhilarating in other ways. For Angela, it gave her the reassurance that it’s okay to ask for help. The people who are most successful in life know where their limits are, and know when they need to ask for help. Asking for help doesn’t mean that you’ve given up, or that you’re not enough.

[32:50] - When you’re suffering, it’s hard to thrive. The message of hope for this podcast is that as you move forward, you suffer less and thrive more. Try to let go of the shame and see what you can do to get yourself out of debt and create the abundance that you want.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

SaneBox

Productive Flourishing Podcast Episode 183: Build Better Boundaries

3 Ways to Deal with Your Nemesis, by Charlie Gilkey

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Marc and Angel Chernoff return to the podcast today to talk with Charlie about some of the key insights they’ve learned about finding your happiness, and always coming back to the rituals that create happiness each and every day. Taking ideas from their book, Getting Back to Happy, they also talk about how letting go of self-defeating stories is a continual practice, no matter where you are on your happiness journey.

Key Takeaways:

[4:05] - Angel and Marc recently released their new book, Getting Back to Happy. One of the main themes of the book is the power of rituals. If you want to make progress, you have to practice the little things every day that take you from where you are to where you want to be. Each chapter in the book leaves you with a ritual to practice. Their book is a reflection of their journey and growth over the past 10 years.

[7:20] - Most people don’t think of rituals or habits as things that correlate to happiness. The focus of these rituals is to examine the daily actions that we do and see how they affect us. Rituals are like intentional discipline; in reality, once you embrace discipline, you also find freedom and happiness.

[9:20] - When the habits you are disciplining yourself to do are meaningful to you, you start noticing the progress. Those habits become your new normal - this takes work. In the beginning it’s hard, but it leads to meaningful change. This discipline is especially applicable to people at the start of their creative journey.

[13:40] - Everything is a process, and we often forget that. You have to take it slow with your personal and professional goals. You learn the way on the way.

[15:20] - Marc and Angel are accidental self-help authors, but it’s because they were in a hard place in their lives. As they were helping each other through their situation, they started to dive into personal development. Their blog started as a public accountability journal, and as it resonated with other people, they moved into more serious coaching, and writing books and courses. Their work is incredibly rewarding because it’s incredibly personal for them.

[19:30] - Marc, Angel, and Charlie discuss the timeline for some of these creative projects. It can take years to get to where you want to be, but each step you take in that direction is important. As long as you’re learning and hopefully making an impact, it’s okay if you’re not where you want to be right now.

[23:05] - Getting back to happy is something that is practiced consistently on a daily basis for years. This is especially true for grief. There is not a quick fix to feeling better, but journeying through it can change the whole trajectory of your life, and looking back, there is a tremendous amount of growth. Even if you’re working through hard stuff, it can be joyful along the way.

[29:05] - The hard work is always worth it. It’s important to remember this when you’re going through a personal struggle, or when you want to move a business or an idea forward. It’s about investing in the small things you have to do daily to accomplish the hard thing.

[31:10] - Removing the boundary of time can open up so many more opportunities. Charlie talks about second and third acts - your career doesn’t have to be over when you reach a certain age. How do you want to be spending your time? We have to be respectful of our time, but it’s never too late to make a small shift.

[35:15] - Marc and Angel are big proponents of daily journaling or reflection. Doing that every day brings awareness to the things you’re learning, the things you want to accomplish, and the things you’re grateful for. This is where you notice your progress, and noticing progress is what makes us happy.

[36:10] - One of the things Marc and Angel talk about in their book is motivation, in relation to our rituals. One of the big things is understanding your why: why do you want to be happier? Maybe it’s for your family, or your health. Knowing your why will keep you motivated when you’re having to do the hard things. On the flip side, you can ask yourself what’s holding you back, and what rituals you need to put in place to correct that (or what rituals you need to change).

[39:55] - Our thoughts are so powerful. Everything we are telling ourselves is a story we’re telling ourselves based on our own personal experience. Realizing and embracing the fact that the stories we are telling ourselves do affect the way we step into present situations is the key. At the end of the day, the thoughts we have affect our motivation, our emotional energy, and what we put in the world.

[42:55] - Writing down your thoughts also serves as an archive, so you can come back to these thoughts when you’re more removed from the situation. You can reflect on these thoughts and see how it’s affecting your ability to take the next step. If these thoughts are our story, we also have the ability to see a new story, or react differently to the story.

[45:03] - So often we say we are stuck because of our situation, instead of taking responsibility and recognizing that we’re better and stronger and actually able to move forward. When you’re at the point that you can indeed move forward, you have to connect yourself to that truth. In these scenarios, you may have to choose the truth that you can accept at that time. It’s about the small steps.

[49:25] - Where are Marc and Angel growing now? Over the past twelve years there has been a lot of growth for both of them, and they’ve got their book coming out, but there are still struggles they are facing. Marc has a fracture in his foot. That’s taken him back a few steps, but he keeps it in perspective by looking at the things he has to be grateful for. This is a great example that the self-evaluation piece is a constant process. Even though helping others learn self reflection is Marc and Angel’s work, they still have to practice too.

[54:52] - When we’re put in situations that challenge our thoughts, or opportunities that are outside our comfort zone, we have to take time to sort those thoughts out and take it one step at a time. Getting Back to Happy is a toolbox that has helped Marc and Angel get through these challenges, and can help us too. Our rituals may have to change, but it’s important to adapt our rituals to keep moving forward.

[1:00:10] - When you’re at the lowest of your lows, and you need something more, help somebody else. Take the focus off not feeling like enough and put it on some else who feels like they aren’t enough. When we help others, we help ourselves.

[1:01:25] - Marc and Angel’s challenge for listeners is to stick to or build a small ritual into your life that you know has meaning and will add value to you and those around you. Take a walk, journal the things you’re grateful for, and do something small like this for 60 days. Also, look at what your daily rituals currently are, and maybe remove something that’s not feeding you in a positive way.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Productive Flourishing Podcast Episode 83: How to Be Grounded and Positive Through Life’s Challenges

Marc and Angel Chernoff

Getting Back to Happy, by Marc and Angel Chernoff the book

Getting Back to Happy Course

Results Resourcing (use code: PFPOD)

SaneBox

The Indicator, Podcast by Planet Money

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Laurence McCahill is the co-founder of The Happy Startup School, a global community that’s now 100,000 people strong. He joins Charlie today to discuss the idea of the “happiness trap,” a belief that many entrepreneurs have that they can either make money, do good, or be happy, but not all three at the same time. They also discuss the productive benefits of taking time out.

Key Takeaways:

[4:50] - Laurence and his partner started The Happy Startup School back in 2013, with the purpose to get people to think about not only the money side of their business, but what’s driving them personally and what kind of impact they want to have. It’s about aligning the need to make money, stay well, and make a difference. Their model is a venn diagram with three circles: money, purpose, and happiness. Ideally, people would be in the intersection of all three circles for a healthy balance.

[7:40] - Many people have the idea that you can be productive or you can take care of yourself. They’re not mutually exclusive! If you view being productive as only doing the things that make money, you’ll miss out on a lot of other aspects of life (family, community involvement, etc). You can also easily get caught up in work, and sometimes, to be most productive there, you may need to walk away and clear your head every once in a while.

[10:30] - In addition to taking care of ourselves because it’s the right thing to do, there are also economic arguments to support that. Laurence references The Lazy Guru and some of their meditation principles. When you create space to look after yourself, amazing things happen. But if you don’t give yourself a chance to go there, you won’t know.

[12:10] - Three insights from The Lazy Guru are 1) Creating space with no purpose - put faith in space, 2) The concept of Beditation - the idea of just sitting in bed, and 3) The thundering herds of “shoulds” - the things we place on ourselves because we feel like we should be doing them. For the third point, these “shoulds” only have power if we accept them to be valid or relevant for our situations.

[14:20] - Especially if you’re running a business, you may look at your competitors and think you should be doing the same things they’re doing. We assume that these things are working for them, and they may actually not be. You have to think about what is relevant for you and your business, and also look for evidence that whatever actions your competitors are taking are actually working for them.

[16:05] - Along with the Happiness Trap model, there are four different archetypes that describe where people fit into the venn diagram. The first is the rat racer, or someone who is fully in the money zone. The purpose-seeker is someone who is doing work that makes them happy, but there’s something missing and they’re still trying to find their purpose. The slave is someone who has found the money and the purpose, but they’re often putting others before themselves and working long hours so their self-care isn’t a priority. The last archetype is the idealist. Idealists usually have a negative relationship with money. You may flip-flop between some of them depending on the day.

[20:40] - There are a lot of people in places that are growing who are very purpose-driven, but the large majority of people are still disengaged in their work and stuck in the rat race so that purpose and their own well-being becomes a luxury. There is a myth (maybe influenced by the Protestant work ethic) that our happiness comes as a byproduct of our work. When you let that go and change your mindset, you can start to find a better balance.

[24:20] - Charlie talks about Plato’s allegory of the cave of deception/illusion. In life, it is constant work to get out from underneath all the societal “shoulds” that push you back into the same habits. In Laurence’s work, he focuses on the science of happiness and non-violent communication to help break the cycle of the cave and focus on the needs to make the business thrive in the long term.

[28:00] - Businesses are meant to solve human aims, not necessarily follow metrics of other businesses. It’s important to build your company on things and ideals that motivate you and are nourishing for you. This can get tricky when you start talking about sales, but there are healthy ways to sell. When you believe in your product and it embodies your values, it becomes more about sharing the product.

[33:21] - What are the three biggest challenges Laurence has seen in his community as people try to find alignment? The first is knowing where to start - think big, start small. The second thing is that many of these people are alone, or in a world that’s very different than the one they want to be in. The people around them aren’t necessarily supportive of what they want to do. The third is the unknown unknowns - there are so many things you don’t know as you’re starting out in business. Embrace everything as a chance to learn.

[36:35] - When starting a business, resilience is more important than talent. If you have high resilience, it’s easier to learn from your experiences as you go. Laurence talks about equanimity, or the idea of how you react to the high and lows of business. How you handle rejection is important in how you will move forward.

[40:55] - Laurence’s business partner is actually an old school friend, which has been a real strength for the business. But they do face some challenges in their business. One big challenge is building a movement and a business at the same time. Another challenge is the events they put on, though they aren’t sustainable year-round. They’ve had to balance the events with building their online community. The last challenge is knowing how big they want to get, or how big they can get and still effectively share their message. Right now, they are operating with a small team that makes a big impact.

[46:30] - Charlie and Laurence talk more about the idea of a small team and a big impact. In any business, it’s important to consider the impact you want to have, and how big your business needs to be to make that happen.

[49:35] - Another thing to keep in mind when building a business on happiness is to remember that when you’re looking at other businesses, they are curated experiences. When you’re looking for evidence of what’s working, realize you’re getting a curated experience and you may need to dig a little deeper to figure out what else they might have had to go through to get there. That’s why at The Happy Startup School they share so much in their writing, so people know the ups and downs and it helps to build trust in their brand.

[51:53] - Laurence’s invitation for listeners is to take some time out to look after yourselves. When you just take time for yourself, with no intention or purpose behind it, you can create the space to let your thoughts and ideas come.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

The Happy Startup School

The Writer’s Process, by Anne Janzer

The Lazy Guru’s Guide to Life, by Laurence Shorter

The Happy Movie

Insanely Gifted, by Jamie Catto

Results Resourcing (use code: PFPOD)

SaneBox

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Amber Rae is the author of Choose Wonder Over Worry. She joins Charlie on the podcast today to talk about how worry shows up in our lives, and how we can convert our worry stories to wonder. This episode can be very helpful for creatives in the midst of finishing their best work, as they look at the patterns that come up when doing so, and how Amber herself worked through them as she was finishing her book.

Key Takeaways:

[3:40] - Worry seems to be our natural state - we spend so much of our lives worrying, and we often make our decisions from a place of worry. Amber experienced this with the start of her book; she put off her book for several years because of insecurities and fears and doubts, and one day she had a wake up call that it was time to go all in on the book.

[7:50] - In their creative careers, many people reach a place that is really good, but there’s often fear that if you let go of the good things, that you either won’t replace them, or you have to face what you’ve been putting off. Amber was pursuing projects that she was good at, but they weren’t what she was here to do (write her book). She talks about the zone of excellence versus the zone of genius.

[10:15] - Amber had an interesting experience during the course of writing her book. Rather than starting with a structure, she started with the stories she was aching to tell. Throughout the writing process, she had to cultivate awareness of when her thoughts were coming from a place of worry. She used her worries as fuel for what she wrote about and also reacted to her own stories and experiences during the writing process.

[16:55] - The idea of choosing wonder over worry isn’t just about coming from worry, but there’s a deeper meaning of getting curious and wondering about your worries. When we engage with our worries, we can figure out if they will serve us or hold us back.

[19:00] - Choose Wonder Over Worry talks about different kinds of worries, and the different ways that worry shows up. One of the big ways worry shows up is time. Instead of “I don’t have enough time,” it’s more about noticing what your priorities are. Another big way is “the myth of not enough,” where we feel we are not enough or don’t have enough to do what we want to do.

[21:45] - Charlie talks about the difference between aspirations and priorities. Oftentimes, we think our aspirations are our priorities, when really our priorities lie elsewhere. Being aware of this difference can guide our actions. More often we find out that our actions don’t necessarily reflect our priorities, even if our talk does. Wondering about our actions is just as important as wondering about our worries. Understanding what’s motivating our actions provides an opportunity for self-compassion.

[26:55] - The top three worries that require the most intentionality for Amber are 1. “I’m not good enough” 2. “Will they hate it?” and 3. “Can I handle how people respond to this?” The work is not to get rid of our worries, but to learn how to have a relationship with these things. Amber focuses her stories on some of the low points and the struggles, and with that comes a fear of vulnerability.

[31:15] - Amber has also faced some rejection during this whole process. Rejection triggers a part of our brain that is responsible for physical pain. In any creative process, each stage is going to have that question of rejection. The question becomes how do we build resilience, and keep showing up when we hear “no?”

[35:10] - We spend a lot of time trying to make our naysayers happy, and not focusing on the majority of people who support it (including ourselves). As artists, we need to get to the point where we can understand that sometimes our art may not reach certain people and that’s okay. There is also a balance where we can accept honest feedback about our work. As an artist, find people that you trust to give you honest feedback about how to make things better.

[38:30] - Throughout her writing process, Amber had a set of friends that she trusted who she would give the work to to provide feedback. You have to find who these people are for you, and be open to what they have to say. Equally important is to take what resonates with you to make changes that fit the integrity of your project.

[41:55] - Amber wrote her book in two and a half months. When she got the deal, they gave a deadline, and she went to Bali and shut out the world. The structure of the book emerged through characters she met herself as she was writing the book.

[45:15] - For many creatives, their practices involve making concepts or ideas tangible and concrete in some way. Getting the stories out into the world and externalizing our ideas helps free up brain space.

[47:18] - The sweet spot for Amber’s creative work is getting to a point where success or failure doesn’t matter, but it’s more about the focus on the journey of learning. This focus seems to be more productive rather than chasing a certain outcome.

[48:00] - Right now, Amber’s biggest worry is that she will be abandoned, because she doesn’t have many successful models of relationships in her life, and she began to experience that with her fiance. She’s been working through this by realizing that she will never leave herself. So many of our fears and worries and doubts are like small children inside of us that are longing for our attention, compassion, and love. It is important to love these parts of ourselves and give ourselves comfort and compassion rather than shame.

[51:25] - Amber’s invitation and challenge for listeners is to notice when you’re approaching a situation or opportunity with worry or wonder. Be aware of your story and the thoughts you’re having and where you’re coming from. Notice, and cultivate your awareness.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Amber Rae

Amber Rae on Instagram

Choose Wonder Over Worry, by Amber Rae

The Artist’s Way, by Julia Cameron

Results Resourcing (Use code: pfpod)

SaneBox

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Mary Shores is the author of Conscious Communications, a step-by-step guide to harnessing the power of your words to change your mind, your choices, and your life. She joins the show today to talk about how neurophysiology, our words, and other people’s behavior affect our ability to create the life we want to live. Today’s conversation is about how and where to make small changes that get us closer to our ideal lives and selves. Mary has been involved in many things in her professional career – she’s been a CEO, runs a debt collection service, and has been a student in personal development and self-improvement.

Key Takeaways:

[5:05] – Many people have learned to expect instant transformation – we read a book and suddenly everything is going to change. In most cases, the things we need to change are going to play out over a period of time. Mary’s personal journey put her in a position to expect this instant change.

[6:53] – Mary was a weekend workshop warrior, but what she began to notice about these events and the people at them, is that they are often riding on the emotions of the event. These events are productive and encouraged, but it’s important to remember that the real transformation will occur in small changes that happen over time after the event.

[8:00] – Charlie and Mary discuss some of the ways neurophysiology can affect these feelings of transformation. Mirror neurons can cause us to feel what the people around us are feeling (whether positive or negative). Mary talks about a phenomenon that whenever we’re in proximity to other people, our brain waves begin to wire in a pattern together.

[12:15] – In philosophy, there’s a topic called The Great Indignities of Science. Charlie briefly discusses these, and how these can help shape the way we think about our place in the world. Science can be very humbling, and there are still many things we are learning about science that will continue to shape and define the way we think and feel.

[13:30] – Mary talks about the monkey experiment that was how they discovered mirror neurons. When the monkey saw a person eat a peanut, their responses measured the same as if the monkey itself was eating the peanut. The 100th Monkey Effect describes a scenario where one group of monkeys started washing potatoes because they enjoyed the taste, and once that number reached a certain critical mass, then monkeys on another island started to wash their potatoes without any instruction. This happens with the human mind too – once a certain collective of humans start to think a certain way, another group of humans will simultaneously start to have these thoughts.

[17:15] – There are phenomena that we know happen, even if we don’t know how or why they happen. But along with what we don’t know, there are things we do know about the brain. We can take the things that we do know are true and apply them to our lives, and have results based on the knowledge we do have. Mary talks about how she changed her philosophy in her debt collection services based on what she knew would trigger people. She came up with a “do not say” list for her office: no, not, can’t, won’t, however, and unfortunately. In the office they replace that list with words that inspire confidence and trust with the client, and triggers the opposite system in the client (parasympathetic nervous system).

[20:25] – When Mary decided she wanted to write a personal development book, she started to research the effect in communications with other people, as well as the effect it has on ourselves when we replace these words for more positivity. We are primed for certain types of experiences, but making changes in our words can cause these experiences to shift.

[22:30] – Our responses are more than just a brain response, even more than a nervous system response. We’re triggered all day every day by things that keep us in a low level fight-or-flight, which means there is less of our body’s energy going to the brain for thinking of solutions. We become over-reactive people. In Mary’s debt collection service, their goal is to get clients to a place where they are neutral or ready to be receptive to a solution. Once they feel okay, then they can start talking about the solution.

[25:10] – What are the ways we can apply the principles Mary uses in her business to our own lives? Words is one of the ways we can become more satisfied people and live meaningful, and happy lives. Shut off the valve of negative words to yourself; become aware of the words you say to yourself and how they’ve shaped your “barrier beliefs.” The way out of this is to invest in yourself, and give yourself the evidence to disprove your barrier beliefs. Mary shares her example of how she came to write her first book by overcoming her thought that she was not a writer.

[30:15] – Growing up, we’re programmed with cultural and family of origin beliefs, and our education takes some of our natural human instincts away from us. The reality is, we understand neurological pathways and are in control of the programming we set for ourselves. We have the power to change any of the beliefs in our mind, we just have to start from somewhere. Start by creating daily practices where you are deciding on a new thought or belief in your subconscious. Creating new pathways will be easier than trying to get rid of the old ones.

[34:20] - While we are capable of overriding our neuro processes, it’s not what we automatically do. It takes work to decide on a new thought process, especially when it comes to how we deal with and react to the people around us. We can change some of our initial reactions by being aware of those moments and ask what’s really going on and how we can make the situation better for the people around us.

[40:00] - We can take these ideas about our initial reactions or what we’re “supposed to do,” and apply it to something relevant in our life. We don’t necessarily have to follow the trajectory that society has sort of set out for us. In fact, not following the status quo can help us find our true purpose. Dial back into what you love and what you’re good at, and feed your strengths.

[45:15] - Mary is an example that we don’t have to follow rote behavior and the path that society laid out for us. She talks about growing up and taking care of her daughter that passed away, and how she was able to recover from that and start her own business at 24.

[48:30] - There are different ways to show up and be in practices of transformation. Sometimes it’s external from a personal development teacher, or it can be internal and self-driven. It’s important to develop the internal engine, because when you’re doing it from a place of empowerment, what you create will be so much more.

[51:10] - There are many different ways that we can be working on ourselves. Everything is a piece that goes to installing better programming in your subconscious. As you continue working on habits, you have to keep practicing things over and over as you become more accomplished and a more powerful self in the world.

[53:35] - Mary has a Core 4 Goals. If you try to take on everything you want to change, it’s easy to get overwhelmed. The focus of the Core 4 are the four things you need to do to accomplish a larger goal (for Mary, writing her book). They help guide and prioritize your actions and your energies. As an example, the Core 4 for Mary’s Business are: sales, industry involvement, custom trainings, and using their branding. They say ‘yes’ to things that support those four, and they say ‘no’ to the things that are outside of those four.

[57:30] - Mary’s invitation for listeners is to think about the concept that everything you say and do, is either creating a deeper connection or it’s driving a disconnection. How will you let the words you use create the life you want to live?

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Mary Shores

Conscious Communications, by Mary Shores

Results Resourcing (use code PFPOD)

SaneBox

Scientists found a 'new organ', but it might not be what you're expecting, by Claire Maldarelli for Popular Science

Akimbo Podcast by Seth Godin Episode 6: Don’t Fear Placebos

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Stan Tatkin is a PACT developer, and co-founder of the PACT Institute. PACT stands for Psycho-biological Approach to Couples Therapy. Stan joins Charlie on the show today to discuss why couple relationships are so hard, at the same time that they are so great and necessary. The main challenges stem from the fact that we are reactive beings first and fast, and thoughtful, loving beings second and slowly. Knowing this about ourselves allows us to build relationships that enable us to thrive.

Key Takeaways:

[3:05] – Relationships are an important part of our lives, at the same time that the challenges with those relationships can be a bad part of our lives. Relationships are hard, because people are difficult. Some in particular are harder than others - love relationships (like that of a parent and child) are hard because they are long-memory and dependency relationships. In our other relationships, we can try to resolve the problems in that primary relationships.

[5:50] - We are memory-driven, and when we do things according to recognition, it’s lightning fast while thinking is very slow. Our brains are also fully automatic, and this can cause us to go on autopilot in our relationships. We can start to make errors in communication and perception, which can lead to fights in a relationship.

[7:05] - The cognitive aspects of our decisions translate over to our emotional behaviors as well. We are more likely to act and react according to recognition. The emotional reaction comes after. Our survival instincts often lead us to go to war over love.

[10:20] - Stan and Charlie discuss being feeling beings over thinking beings. As much as we believe we are thinking beings, we are really feeling beings first.

[13:00] - It would be ideal if early education covered how to learn, and also how to be in relationships. Students would learn what relationships are, and what it means to be in a relationship. This might foster learning how you feel in different scenarios as well, and widening the range of emotions (Charlie likens this to primary colors). We also have primary emotions, and as we grow up we begin to feel more, and get blended emotions. Some people have alexithymia, where they don’t know what they are feeling.

[17:10] - Stan doesn’t have a statistic on how many people are affected by alexithymia, but it’s a developmental capacity model, so it looks at what people can and cannot do in the social/ emotional realm. Some of the limitations in the social/ emotional realm can cause problems in our love relationships. Stan provides some specific examples of how this can play out.

[19:38] - As humans, we are more primed for war and fighting, and we have unequal capacities in the emotional realm. When we add our historical relationships into our new relationships, that’s where the complexities arise. While we are primed for fighting, we are also dependent on relationships with others. They often interfere with our other need to survive; this creates a constant tension between our need to depend on others and our fear of getting hurt.

[22:18] - The good news is that there are ways to understand this complexity so that it doesn’t become such a problem. You can confide in a trusted person, but love relationships also provide tremendous repair. It is up to us to foster our love relationships to be productive rather than destructive.

[24:50] - Relationships are work - we have to work to get them to where we want to be so we can thrive together. There are some indicators that might predict relationships that don’t work out. On a biological level, two nervous systems may be so reactive that they don’t get along. The things people do as mistakes are: 1. They come from an insecure model where the family operates unfairly and unjustly too often, and they carry that forward into their own relationships that accrue this same unfairness 2. They don’t understand the primacy of the relationship, and don’t understand third things that are added to the relationship that take time away from the pair 3. They don’t have a sense of purpose or vision, or a sense of why they are together.

[29:35] - How do we come up with the guiding principles and vision in a relationship? It is almost irresponsible to not make the time to think about this. As you are coming up with principles that will protect you from each other, think about the intention behind each principle. There are shared beliefs that are fairly universal, and these can guide you in coming up with the vision for your relationship.

[32:55] - In a relationship, as you start defining your principles and vision, make sure you also agree on the purpose behind it. Challenge each other to explore why the vision serves a personal good and a mutual good. Practice full transparency without conditions.

[35:35] - What are general dealbreakers people should look for as they start to have these conversations? One of them is the transparency without conditions, and finding someone who believes the same. Deal breakers will eventually get to people. If you disagree on fundamental items, it will perpetuate the same problems down the road.

[37:55] - Some people are under the assumption (and hope) that the other person in the relationships, or they themselves, will change their stance on one of the deal breakers. As a couples therapist, Stan doesn’t see that this usually works out. It is hard because people don’t want to experience the loss. It is very painful, but there would be worse things to come other than breaking up.

[41:05] - There is a difference between surviving and thriving in a relationship. You can survive by negotiating on your non-negotiables, but it is hard to thrive in a relationship like that. As change is the only constant, even as a thriving couple, time may change your views on these non-negotiables. A task throughout the relationship is to know how people are going to adjust, and how they’re going to bargain so it’s good for both people in the relationship.

[43:26] - People may resist taking the time to outline some of these non-negotiables and their vision, because they are afraid there is something they will have to change or something will come up that they don’t want to face. This is part of the human condition; people don’t always show exactly what they want, even to themselves.

[45:04] - When you’ve been in a relationship for a long time, like Charlie and Angela, it may be a good time to occasionally come together to talk about some of the decisions you’ve made previously and make sure that you’re still on the same page. Charlie shares the example of himself and Angela and the topic of having kids. Even if the relationship is comfortable, it could be productive to check in and make sure it’s still set up for the couple to thrive.

[47:37] - Recommitment offers a time to remarry and redo your vision for the future. As you move through time together, there are a number of things that can change the playing field. It’s hard to get people to do this proactively, but it could save a marriage (or relationship). The fear of loss can be a good motivator for coming to terms with what you could now agree on.

[49:30] - Stan doesn’t want couples to fear each other, except for in one sense. At any time, either person involved has the power to pull the trigger on the other, and leave the relationship. This gives rise to a kind of respect in the sense that there are lines you don’t cross. Both people need to make sure their needs are being met.

[51:40] - When someone is giving up their sense of self or their sense of fairness, it will backfire on both partners. This might become a therapeutic issue, and often when previous offenses show back up. These things can be corrected quickly if people have the right attitude.

[54:45] - Stan’s invitation for listeners is to come to one of the couples retreats coming up. He challenges listeners to come up with a plaque-able “10 Commandments” for your relationship. Don’t overthink this - it should be easy and simple to understand.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Relationships Are Hard, But Why?, TEDx Talk by Stan Tatkin

Stan Tatkin

The PACT Institute

Daughters, by John Mayer

SaneBox

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Ash Beckham is today’s guest on the show. She frequently speaks on empathy, respect, and the power of having real conversations. Her two TedX talks have over 10 million views on YouTube. She joins Charlie to talk about how we can master real, and sometimes hard, conversations in an age of combativeness. Hint: It’s not about making others adopt your perspective.

[3:00] - In her TedX talk “Coming Out of Your Own Closet,” Ash talks about coming to terms with her sexual identity and gender fluidity. She says she experiences “phases of militant lesbian intensity.” For many people, when they come to terms with their identity, it’s an introspective version at first, then they decide how they want that to exist in the world. Once Ash figured out how she felt most comfortable in her identity, there was a need to defend her struggle to be comfortable with herself. Her “new normal” became her constantly being on guard to defend herself, and conversations became combative.

[6:15] - People in marginalized groups are often always thinking about whether they’re in a safe environment. Sometimes we focus on the people who may not accept us, and overlook the instances where people don’t care or are open and ready to accept. When we engage in conversation, we have to think about whether it’s going to be a conversation, or a monologue. We have to be in control of our responses when we perceive we’re being judged.

[11:15] - Many of us have been involved in conversation where someone is hurt by the words. We may forget that in some contexts, we are in fact the marginalizing or oppressing person, and we’re quick to get defensive because we wouldn’t intentionally do that. Just because you are marginalized doesn’t mean you’re immune to oppressing other marginalized people. Even if we think we can relate to someone, we have to keep our situations in perspective when we converse with people.

[14:50] - While we can emotionally understand what it’s like to be someone else, it’s important to remember that we all have our own lived experiences, and we can never fully imagine someone else’s circumstances until we’ve experienced them ourselves. It is important when building relationships with people who aren’t like you, to build trust where you can share the stories that will allow you to really understand what their situation is like. This open dialogue allows people to become advocates or allies for marginalized groups with some credibility. Standing with someone is maybe more important than standing up for someone.

[17:15] - Identity fluidity is how a person self-identifies. Several identities (race, sexual identity, etc) transition into intersectionality. We are comprised of all of our identities and that’s how we present ourselves in the world. We can’t necessarily separate the identities from each other.

[21:05] - This intersectionality can be influenced by the context of our situation. This concept is easily relatable because we all operate differently in different contexts. We may downplay parts of our identity depending on the people we’re with.

[23:00] - There is a lot of primed combativeness in the world today. The challenge is finding compassion in all this combativeness. Social media has given us a way to find people who are like us, but change isn’t about surrounding ourselves with people who are just like us. The way to create change is by surrounding ourselves with people who aren’t like us and creating structured relationships so we know how to interact, relate and connect with people in a real way.

[26:50] - When we start having conversations based on what people need and want, we can start to find a middle ground. It’s easy to surround ourselves with people who think like us, but if we only do that, we become more polarized. The real change is going to come from interacting with people who don’t think the same as us and finding a middle ground with them.

[29:00] - With the many polarized opinions in the world today, how do we interact in situations when we’re around people we don’t agree with? With family members, there is shared history. This shared history can help ground conversation in something other than politics, and you can also set rules around a level of respect if the conversation goes a different direction. Rather than focusing on being right or wrong, truly engaging to learn more about another person’s perspective is how we can start having respectful conversations.

[33:15] - Having feeling in conversations can be hard and uncomfortable sometimes. We can practice by effectively engaging with people who have slightly different opinions than us, and create a safe space where you can practice listening without judgement. Once you’re able to listen without judgement, you can respectfully engage in conversation with people who have vastly different beliefs than you.

[37:30] - We engage with other people to broaden our perspective of what it means to identify as a different race, religion, political view, etc. If we’re only listening and engaging with people who think just like us, we’re not truly respecting diversity. Ash shares a specific example of using the word ‘gay’ and how by engaging in respectful conversation, she is able to help others understand and appreciate how using that word in a negative connotation is hurtful not only to her, but to everyone. The breadth of the change becomes much larger.

[41:00] - We get caught up in the mentality of being politically correct and saying the right thing, that we shut down from engaging in conversation altogether. That inhibits progress for allies to learn the best ways to support marginalized people and be educators for other people, or just educating other people about your thoughts and beliefs. Some of the most challenging conversations are those with people who want to engage but don’t know how, or people who are scared to engage or have been discouraged from engaging.

[44:55] - Three steps people can take to start having hard conversations: 1. The first step is to practice. Practice in safe spaces. 2. Accountability - find someone who wants to go on the journey with you and hold you accountable to starting the more challenging conversations. 3. Find one news source that is different than what you usually listen to and read an article a day from somebody who thinks differently than you.

[46:55] - Ash’s challenge for listeners is to have one hard conversation before the next time you listen to the Productive Flourishing podcast.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

TEDx Talk: Coming Out of Your Closet

TEDx Talk: Owning Your Duality

Ash Beckham

SaneBox

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Today’s guest is Parker Stevenson, a musician turned corporate manager, turned member of Evolved Finance. Evolved Finance is a bookkeeping, financial consulting, and business education company dedicated to helping online entrepreneurs create profitable and healthy businesses. Charlie and Parker talk about using business financial awareness as a fuel for growth. They discuss the mistakes entrepreneurs make with their money, and some general guidelines on how to manage the money you do make. No matter where you are in your creative or entrepreneurial journey, your financial reports can tell you where, or how your business might grow.

Key Takeaways:

3:20] – For many creative people, entrepreneurs, or small business owners, talking about financing and money is not something they want to do. On the flip side, this can be something that makes a huge difference in their business thriving.

[4:15] – Parker comes from one of these creative backgrounds – his family was very musical and he was in a band in LA, but while he was in school he also got a business degree. His musical background helped his next corporate experience (with Adidas), because while he was in the band he was essentially running his own small business with his band. He worked his way up at Adidas but was missing aspects of being a musician. His current position with Evolve Finance allows him to combine the best of both worlds – the entrepreneurial side of being a musician and the stability of the corporate world. At Evolve, they help online business owners and entrepreneurs manage the financial side of their business through bookkeeping and do other financial business coaching.

[7:25] – Parker shares some of the important lessons he learned through his previous background that he is able to apply to his position today. The first is the hustle involved in being a musician – you have to create the thing you’re selling as well as market it, network, and keep the “business” operating. As a musician, he was also always seeking opportunities. In the corporate world, he learned how to operate a complex organization, which he was able to directly apply to the branding and operational processes at Evolve.

[10:25] – Sometimes making the jump from being in corporate to being an entrepreneur is hard because you go from being a specialist to being a generalist. Knowing which category you fall in will be helpful as you move forward in your business so you know if there are areas where you’ll need to get some help or outside expertise. There is also a lot of personal investment when you’re selling a product that you’ve created.

[14:05] – One of the phases many of the clients at Evolve go through is once they scale to a large enough size, they are usually looking for someone who is a generalist, like a business manager or operations manager, who can handle several things at once. This is a game changer for many small businesses, and allows you as the entrepreneur to focus on your creative work.

[16:30] – When looking for opportunities, creatives have a tendency to go after too many opportunities and chase too many revenue streams. Financially, chasing an additional revenue stream might actually deplete the other one. Parker makes the analogy of a business operating on two batteries: a money battery, and a time battery. It may take some experimenting to see what combination is going to maximize both your time and money.

[20:35] - There is a humility in letting the numbers tell you what is actually working. Sometimes the things we want to be successful are not actually the things that are the most profitable for the business. Many new entrepreneurs don’t realize how much money they can make off of one thing.

[23:45] - Today, it’s easier to advertise across several platforms, and it’s easier to find your audience. There is not as much of an upfront cost to find your audience. If you can afford to invest a little bit of money up front for advertising your product, you may be able to save some time for content creation.

[28:50] - What areas should new businesses invest in to get the most bang for their buck? In today’s day and age, it’s important to invest the most money in your website and your software. Once you have that, you can do a lot on your own. The next big investment would be labor, whether it’s people to help you create or project-type contractors to help you manage. Advertising is also another area where successful businesses are investing. Be cautious about over-investing in these areas too soon. Charlie talks about the benefits of saving a little on your website investment to get good copyrighting from the start.

[34:55] - Some of these investments may seem like a lot of money, but from a business perspective, these long-term investments will continue to bring you money. Making small investments in the early stages can help your business grow faster.

[37:15] - Many times when we’re assessing our strategic opportunities, we compare the good points of our current decision against the bad points of a different decision. A better way to do this is to consider the disadvantages and advantages of your current decision, and compare those to the disadvantages and advantages of the other different decisions.

[41:10] - There are some baseline ratios that indicate a healthy business. For labor, you want 20-35%, depending on your type of business. Advertising costs can vary, but Parker notes the importance of getting a positive ROI; it’s not necessarily about how much you’re spending, but about how much you’re bringing in for each dollar you spend on marketing. The profit margin should be considered the most, though it is also dependent on your situation. Most businesses should strive for 30%-50% profit.

[46:45] - As you’re in different stages of your business, these ratios might shift, and that is okay! If you’re hiring, margins might be tight for a bit, but you’re opening up the business to be able to serve more clients. These ratios might also change depending on whether your business is a service-based business or a product-based business.

[50:00] - When you’re ready to hire someone new, you have to look at your profit margin to see if you can afford to bring someone new to the business. Again, this should be evaluated depending on whether you’re a service-based or product-based business. Rather than focusing on a number or ratio, you should ask yourself whether hiring a new person is really going to free you up to do more creative work. If you feel like you’re going to get a good return on the labor investment, find the money and figure it out.

[56:30] - A lot of small business owners talk about profit without including their owner’s pay. If you know your business needs to pay you, make sure you include that in your profit margin. You don’t have a profitable business if your business is not able to pay you. You also have to make sure you’re saving money for taxes, anywhere from 30%-40%. For a smaller business, putting away 20%-25% should put you in a good place.

[1:00:15] - Your P&L (profit & loss) statement is important to make sure you’re capturing all of your business expenses so your profit is 100% accurate. You also want to make sure these things are accurate for filing taxes. It’s also important to get an accountant for taxes - you don’t want to do it by yourself and risk getting in trouble.

[1:03:25] Parker’s invitation and challenge to listeners is to take a look at where you’re at for the year. Look all the way back to January and see how those months look, and challenge yourself to understand what’s going on with the money in those months. Getting to know your numbers in a way that’s clear and easy to understand can change the way you start to see your business.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

SaneBox

Evolved Finance

Productive Flourishing Podcast Episode 78: The 3 Essential Pieces of Your Business's Legal, Tax and Financial Foundation with Kyle Durand

Productive Flourishing Podcast Episode 163: Jacquette Timmons: The Relationship Between Your Identity and Your Finances

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Angela joins Charlie on the show today to talk about communication technology in our lives. This is an engaging conversation about how our connection to technology affects our connections and relationships with the people around us. They talk about creating healthy boundaries with communication technology that allow us to focus more time on things that benefit us, as well as investing more in the relationships we have with the people who are most important to us.

Key Takeaways:

[3:24] - We often set boundaries for our work and our relationships with other people, but sometimes we need to set boundaries for ourselves and our communication technology.

[5:27] - 25 years ago, before text messages and smartphones, there were different expectations around how people engaged with each other. With today’s technology, we can be in constant communication with people, but we feel more disconnected with people than when we didn’t talk to them all the time. There are also more expectations for instantaneous responses.

[8:45] - We used to go to the computer to complete specific tasks, like write a paper, or search for something specific on the web. After we were finished, we would turn the computer off and be done with it. Nowadays, we are always connected to a computer via smartphone or tablet, and even when we’re with other people, there’s always that device intruding into the conversation.

[12:20] - What is our connection to technology doing to our generation and future generations? Angela muses about how communication will change and how that will influence how connected people feel to each other. Today we are connected to so many more people in so many more ways because of technology, and while that can be a good thing, we’re often not connected to all those people on a deeper relational level than when we’re connected in person. On the flip side, being able to communicate from behind a screen has helped some more feel more comfortable.

[15:15] - There’s no real evidence that the technological connections we have with people have allowed us to exceed Dunbar’s number. Dunbar’s number states that once we get past 150 people, we can’t have meaningful connections with people. When it comes to today’s technology, this may mean that we are less strongly connected with the people that we are physically around, since we’re trying to be connected with so many people via our technology.

[19:20] - There are benefits of these communicative technologies, especially if you aren’t around people in your physical community that you can really relate to. Being able to connect via technology can help you find your tribe and people that you relate to even if they aren’t in the same place you are. There doesn’t necessarily need to be a distinction between these people and people you are physically connected to - it’s really more about how true to yourself you are in these relationships.

[21:30] - Multi-threading is more common with today’s technology than it was 25 years ago. We’re often doing something on our phones or computers while we’re watching a show or listening to a book. This could be where we’re experiencing the lack of connection, because sometimes it can feel like people can’t just slow down to be with you in that time. Charlie talks about his reasoning to get an Apple Watch and how this has helped him sort of get back to staying connected and keeping communicative technology separate and intentional.

[25:13] - We’re never really offline, and that has a tremendous impact on who we are as people and our ability to really show up when we’re meant to be somewhere. Never having technology off and away from you never allows you to be fully present in the moment. So much of our attention and our energy is being zapped from us all the time with technology. Angela talks about a client she had who would always check the news on her phone before she got out of bed, and she and Charlie talk about how this affects the rest of the day.

[29:55] - What fires together wires together, and just the act of touching our phones can lead to the chain of events that gets us invested in the news or social media on our phones. The more that we touch our phones and do the same things, the more we are priming ourselves to do that every time, even if that’s not originally why we grabbed our phones in the first place. If you are a person who is addicted to apps on the phone, you can remove them from your phone and see the change. If you turn it off, you can finally start to hear your own voice.

[33:43] - Charlie talks about a study that showed that the apps you use the most on your phone are actually the ones that make you the least happy, and those you use the least make you the most happy. The apps that people use most on their phones are social media apps. Typically when we aren’t feeling great we get on social media, where we are bombarded with people’s curated experiences or people expressing frustration or anger. It’s not always particularly uplifting.

[38:05] - Creating a boundary from digital technology by separating yourself from your phone and apps can be very powerful. It’s hard to do the work that matters if you’re constantly distracted by other people’s experiences or the news, etc. Instead you can focus on doing your best work and investing in the relationships you do have the strongest ties with. Being intentional about deciding to create this boundary is very a powerful choice.

[41:30] - Angela talks about the benefits of her decision to create some boundaries with technology. In the past month or so, as she’s separated herself from media, she’s going to bed earlier, exercising more, eating better, and reading stuff she actually wants to read. Many of us have habits associated with our consumption of passive media, and you can try to control those responses, or you can create a boundary that cuts those ties and gives you time to do more productive things.

[46:20] - For people who love social media and other communicative technology, that’s okay. Do a full audit to see if the benefit outweighs the other costs of using that technology. If it doesn’t, see what kind of choices you could make that could accomplish the same goals that could even create stronger connections.

[48:23] - The invitation/challenge for this week is to really take stock of the ways in which you’re using technology to be in connection with other people, and experiment with what it might be like to remove some of those from your daily flow.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Creative Giant Campfire

Deep Work, by Cal Newport

Alone Together, by Sherry Turkle

SaneBox

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Tara Gentile is an author and business strategist, who works with entrepreneurs and helps them design their personal “quiet power strategy” that will tap into their strengths and help them lead themselves where they want to go. She teaches her clients how to find what makes them most effective. Her work has been featured in Fast Company, Forbes, Design Sponge, and in the bestselling book The $100 Startup. She is also an instructor and speaker, teaching about entrepreneurship, money, and the new economy. She joins Charlie on the show today to talk about her journey and her work and share some of her insights on the entrepreneurial world.

Key Takeaways:

01:40 – How Tara got started doing what she does.

06:28 – The hardest lessons Tara learned during her first years of business.

09:58 – How Tara’s background in religious studies helped and also didn’t help in her early years of business.

13:23 – Figuring out how what you create aligns with people’s worldviews and with their needs and with their values.

14:29 – Entrepreneurs realizing that they’re solving the same problem everyone else is solving, but doing it in a way that’s completely unique to you.

15:42 – What Kick Start Labs is all about.

18:40 – How Tara balances being an introvert and doing the work that she does.

23:51 – How being a control freak can get in the way of being an entrepreneur and navigating a business.

28:37 – Moments in Tara’s career that made her know for sure this was what she wanted to be doing.

34:33 – What Tara is afraid of right now in her work.

37:57 – The most unanticipated challenge Tara is currently facing.

39:30 – Leverage what’s most effective for you.

Mentioned In This Episode:

Quiet Power Strategy

Fast Company

Forbes

Design Sponge

The New York Times

The $100 Startup, Chris Guillebeau

CreativeLive

Lebanon Valley College

Borders Books and Music

Kick Start Labs

Etsy

Pioneer Nation

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Bryan Caplan is a Professor of Economics at George Mason University, blogger for Econ-log, and author of The Case Against Education: Why the Education System Is a Waste of Time and Money. He joins Charlie on the show today for a vibrant discussion of why education is a waste of time and money, and why we still buy it. They also talk about the degree to which non-rational motivations can affect larger, macro trends. Both Bryan and Charlie are passionate about education, especially alternative education, and this conversation provides some insight into some different ways to achieve educational goals.

Key Takeaways:

[2:05] – If you’re looking for a solution for managing your inbox, try SaneBox! See link below to start your free trial and get a $25 credit.

[3:20] – Bryan’s book is called The Case Against Education: Why the Education System is a Waste of Time and Money. While Bryan is a successful professor and the system has been good to him, he feels the system is dysfunctional, and while other aspects of social systems are changing, education seems to be stagnant.

[5:30] – The heart of Bryan’s argument is that most of what kids are taught in school is not relevant in the real world. Another puzzle is why do employers reward employees for having passed all those subjects that they aren’t going to use? The signaling model of education says that employers might reward you for your education because you learn skills in school and they’re paying for your skills, and the other reason is that even if you study something that’s not relevant to your job, it’s still impressive and would hopefully translate to whatever job you’re doing.

[7:05] – Historically, education was focused on training people to become a minister, lawyer, or doctor. As time went on, they added more subjects like natural science and computer science, but the traditions of that model still linger in the system today. While there is purity in the humanities model in terms of becoming a worldly person, you didn’t necessarily go to school to create a livelihood.

[10:15] – The type of education that Bryan is against is formal schooling and things that relate to it. The classroom environment doesn’t work for everyone.

[13:38] – The primary value of education is not the human capital argument, but rather that it signals something in the broader marketplace. The human capital theory states that when you go to school and learn skills, you emerge a better worker, which is valuable to companies. The other argument is for signaling, which shows that when someone applies themselves to something and they can do it well, it convinces employers that you are worth hiring and training. Bryan shares the analogy of the two ways to raise the value of a diamond to help demonstrate this difference.

[15:50] – Are the signals that people receive accurate? If they weren’t, Bryan imagines someone would have already come up with a different way to select employees that would earn them a lot of money. Since that is not happening, the signaling is probably rooted in truth.

[19:50] – Bryan discusses the topic of “de-hiring,” which is the process of companies getting rid of a worker without firing, but by helping them get another job. This follows the thesis of Bryan’s book because the trend seems to be that companies don’t automatically get rid of incompetent employees, and that a false signal could end up working out in the end. In the labor market, an employer might care more about the credential than the knowledge. If enough people are hiring based on credentials, it creates a macro trend.

[22:15] – Employers might want people with fancy degrees to impress customers. This is another form of signaling. Signaling is branch of optics, and there are different ways the optics can create perceived value that continues an action that makes no sense. Bryan and Charlie discuss some of the trends in hiring, and how employers tend to look for people who have done something or have some formal education, but how this could overlook people who would perform really well who don’t have the same credentials.

[28:25] – The reasons we have for our actions are not always the reasons we think they should be, and it’s important to consider to what degree those reasons dictate broad trends in society. For example, in the military you have to have a college degree to be a commissioned officer, but it doesn’t matter what type of degree. The same thing happens in PhD programs. This perpetuates people going through higher education for the degree rather than the knowledge that will be applied.

[34:00] – Bryan has policy perspectives and proposals for the case against education. The first is that the government needs to cut sharply from education funding to end the rut. There has been enormous credential inflation over the past few decades, but most of what’s happened is that jobs that in the past would have required a high school degree are now requiring a lot more education to get it, though not necessarily to do it. The main question for Bryan is how can we cut credential inflation? Bryan explains his logic that reducing education will reduce inflation, and this can be achieved by cutting funding. This would be across a large scale, not just for a select group of individuals.

[39:00] – Another thing frequently found in the marketplace is that when there are a fewer number of people with degrees, then we value them even more (supply and demand). Bryan has crunched these numbers, and he explains how even in this scenario there will be a much larger number of people doing better than they are in the current system. This would allow people to get a good job out of high school.

[43:10] – Vocational education is another avenue that could help create the type of education environment Bryan is talking about. There is research that states that vocational education is selfishly better for students. In addition, students who don’t like the formal school environment, vocation keeps them involved in learning something rather than the alternatives. In our society, there’s a bit of a stigma around vocational school, but it can be a better path for some students. The default option of going to college is not working for a whole lot of people.

[50:55] - The main point is that students are getting the kind of education that will suit them. There are many different types of students, and the current default path of graduating high school and going straight into college doesn’t work for everyone. There are kids who will flourish in that system if that’s really what they want to do, but it’s also important to consider what kind of skills students will learn by taking time to study a trade before deciding if university education is what they want. Additionally, Bryan and Charlie discuss how a lot of what students are learning in standard curriculum doesn’t carry on into their adult lives.

[54:30] - Bryan talks about the biggest rebuttal he’s heard for his argument, and how he incorporates it into his philosophy. The rebuttal places merit on the predictability of national prosperity based on national test scores, and would reorient the education system toward the direction of boosting math and science scores. Bryan doesn’t believe people would actually work to reform the system, and also feels like most typical jobs don’t use a lot of math and science, and the test scores are actually reflective of the effects of intelligence. Intelligence is much harder to change than math and science scores, but also more widely applied in different ways than specific to math and science.

[57:45] - A better focus of education might be critical thinking, reasoning, and decision making, because those things apply to every industry. School psychology argues that these topics, especially critical thinking, are difficult to teach, and particularly difficult to get students to apply outside of the classroom. This applies to other subjects of study too - outside of the context in which there’s a performance aspect, many people don’t use the skills they’ve learned.

[1:03:00] - Bryan’s invitation/ challenge for listeners is to go through the list of courses from your last year of formal education and compare them to what you’re doing today and see how often you see a connection between what you learned and what you use today.

Additional Links:

Productive Flourishing

Productive Flourishing Podcast Episode 169: Penelope Trunk: Asperger's, Creativity and the Education System

Productive Flourishing Podcast Episode 153: Michelle Jones and Austin Goldberg: Wayfinding Academy 101

Bryan Caplan

The Case Against Education: Why The Education System is a Waste of Time and Money

SaneBox

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Kathleen Kelly Janus is a social entrepreneur, author, and lecturer at Stanford University. She recently released her book called Social Startup Success. She joins Charlie today to discuss how nonprofits maximize their impact by adopting some of the same strategies that modern, for-profit organizations are using. They also touch on how the non-profit sector unintentionally reinforces the same inequities they’re attempting to solve.

Key Takeaways:

[1:30] – SaneBox is a great resource for managing your email inbox. See link below for more information!

[3:15] – Kathleen’s origin story: Kathleen grew up in a small town in California where she spent weekends volunteering and giving back to her community. Her parents instilled this virtue in her, but also spent time talking about the importance of the organizations caring for vulnerable communities, and whether they had the resources necessary to do so. Kathleen experienced this firsthand when she started her own nonprofit, Spark, but they capped out at $500,000 in revenue and they couldn’t get the capital that they needed to grow.

[5:00] – Kathleen started to research the top-performer organizations in the country to understand why some organizations succeed and manage to scale, and others don’t. This research culminated in her book, Social Startup Success. It highlights five basic strategies that successful organizations seemed to implement to get to their level of success.

[6:00] – Scale can mean different things to different people. For Kathleen in her book, scale is about getting to a level of sustainability, so organizations aren’t struggling to survive but are able to focus on their social impact. Charlie talks about the tension between scaling and sustainability: sometimes strategies used to scale can keep you from being sustainable, and on the other hand, some versions of sustainability prevent you from being able to scale.

[8:00] – One of the speed bumps people often encounter in starting and running nonprofits is the previously mentioned $500,000 revenue block, but there are others that come up as well. The five strategies Kathleen outlines in her book are the ones that target what organizations get the most tripped-up over. The strategies are innovation, impact, funding experimentation and fundraising, leading collaboratively, and storytelling.

[10:15] – In the business world, sometimes when an organization reaches a speed bump, they might have to change the nature of their organization in order to scale and grow. Nonprofits often experience these fundraising speed bumps, and different organizations will have to treat them differently depending on their scale. Kathleen talks about some of the steps to overcoming speed bumps as revenue increases. There is testing, or figuring out which revenue stream works best for your organization. As revenue increases, it’s about perfecting that strategy for scale. It’s important to be intentional about your strategy for scaling given the stage of your business so you choose a strategy that will allow you to continue great work without wasted time, effort, or heart (especially for nonprofits).

[15:10] – While strategies to grow can be learned, time is the enemy when it comes to some of the social issues many nonprofits are trying to solve. It is Kathleen’s hope that through Social Startup Success and capacity building, they can give organizations the tools they need to grow their business efficiently and effectively. Many nonprofits focus on serving the next generation (not necessarily adult customers), and it requires us to have a longer view, while at the same time taking action now.

[17:35] – A big part of Kathleen’s thesis is that many nonprofits are operating in an old-fashioned way, and they could modernize to maximize their impact. What Kathleen has noticed is that many organizations have been doing good work in the community for years, but have grown accustomed to that work and don’t think about gaining a fresh perspective. There have been improvements in technology that allow organizations to measure their impact better. Donors have also changed, and often want to do more than just cut a check. For nonprofits, it’s important to learn how to leverage your donors and get them more involved in the causes.

[20:20] – Charlie talks about how in the business sector, organizations must adapt or they die. A similar trend happens in the non-profit sector, but market forces don’t exist in the same way. There are a lot of factors that keep nonprofits afloat that maybe aren’t having the impact that they should have. If you are involved in a nonprofit, it’s important to really think about whether you’re having an impact or not. If not, maybe think about course correction that can get you back on track with the work you really want to be doing.

[21:05] – There seems to be a lack of willingness to be transparent in the non-profit sector, and this often prevents organizations from finding ways to improve. Funders don’t require this transparency, and then there is no incentive for organizations to be honest about what’s working and what’s not. To create better systems, you have to have that honesty. A level of transparency is also important for your donors as well, so they know where their money is going.

[24:25] – If you’re listening to this episode and aren’t involved in a non-profit organization, but still want to support a social cause you care about, there are other ways to get involved! There are so many channels for people to help make a difference these days. Many companies are integrating social change work and volunteer work into their everyday work.

[25:40] - You can also give back time and skills - it doesn’t always have to be monetary. Kathleen shares several examples of how you can donate professional skills. Think about what you’re passionate about and what you care about, and find organizations that are going to be the most effective. You might be spread thin across several organizations, but focusing on fewer at a deeper level might make more of a difference.

[29:30] - There are some organizations that aren’t getting funded, as well as organizations that are not involved in the non-profit sector that should be. Oftentimes we’re funding people from privileged backgrounds to start organizations at the expense of community-based leaders who are already connected to the communities they’re serving, but may not have the language to talk about their work or the resources. Ideally there would be philanthropic systems for giving out capital in ways that don’t just reward who has the most networks or biggest business plan, but who is making the most impact on an effective level. Racial and gender bias comes into play here too, with white-founded and male-founded organizations typically receiving more funding.

[34:00] - There should be a diversity of decision-making in the non-profit sector, and organizations also must be reflective of the communities they’re serving, or they’re not going to be effective. There are two levels of effectiveness: operationally effective and culturally effective. Philanthropic systems don’t always understand the extent to which they are reinforcing the very issues they’re trying to solve, and that’s where there needs to be more awareness.

[35:35] - Is there a difference between being involved and becoming an activist? We all have something to give in this world, and we all have the capacity to be activists for causes that we care about. If we can all think about how we can do our part to be activists, we can begin to solve problems.

[37:20] - There have been some different trends since the 60’s and 70’s, and one of the big ones is that social issues have been assigned to the government to fix. If you’re thinking about becoming an activist, think about how you can get involved in your community to solve your community’s problems. It doesn’t necessarily have to be on a larger scale to make a difference.

[38:55] - One of the things that surprised Kathleen most in her research is that from her interviews, she began to realize that we all have the ability to learn how to do our work better. It comes down to the fundamental strategies that all organizations have to implement in order to be more effective. Passion and charisma can only get you so far. It’s the people who get in there and do the work that are most effective. Collective leadership is also a key to being more effective.

[41:36] - Now that she’s out on the book trail, it’s been interesting for Kathleen to see what resonates with other people. The issue of bias seems to put people on the edge of their chairs.

[42:55] - Kathleen’s challenge for listeners is to get involved in a cause that you care about. It doesn’t matter what the cause is - if you get involved in something, you can have an impact in your community and together we can make the world a better place.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Kathleen Janus

Social Startup Success, by Kathleen Janus

SaneBox

Spark

The Deepest Well, by Nadine Burke Harris

Good to Great, by Jim Collins

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Bryan Falchuk is the author of Do a Day, a book that shows readers how to learn to make each day contribute to the life they want to live. He joins Charlie on the show today to talk about how his transformation - from being obese and depressed, to a marathon-running, top executive - gave him the insights to write Do a Day. They also dive into how changing externally doesn’t always lead to internal change, as well as how grit and motivation are more important when it comes to personal transformation.

Key Takeaways:

[2:00] - We expect when we go through change that it’s just going to be one thing that we do, but when we come out on the other side we find that it was the conjoining of many things that led to radical change. Even if there is one thing you want to change, you have to be willing to make a lifestyle change if that’s going to stick.

[3:05] - Bryan’s backstory: Bryan was overweight as a kid - his parents got divorced when he was young, which triggered anxiety and depression. In an effort to gain some control, he turned to food. He lost weight in his teen years, but didn’t address the underlying issues. He had put on some more weight, experienced change in his work environment, and the issues surrounding his parents’ divorce rose again. At the same time, his wife had a chronic illness that seemed would take her life (she is okay now), but having to watch his son watch his mom was a transformational moment where Bryan decided he didn’t want his son to have to go through that twice.

[6:00] - This moment was a moment of clarity for Bryan as he began to reflect on the kind of father he wanted to be and the kind of person he wanted to be. He was physically and professionally miserable because he felt like he was failing himself. In moments of clarity like this, you can either notice it and go back to the way you’ve been doing things, or you can grab hold of it and make a change. He chose to grab it and immediately began making changes.

[7:42] - There were three key things he wanted to change: The first was his weight; he had a goal he wanted to get to by the end of the year. The second was his job situation. And the last thing was dealing with the emotional baggage he’d been carrying around from his childhood.

[9:25] - Sometimes, we need a breakdown before we can have a breakthrough. Most of us aren’t willing to get introspective and get to the root of what’s really going on because it’s scary and we may feel comfortable in the mindlessness of our current situation, even if it’s not conducive to who you want to be in the world. As you embark on your transformation, surround yourself with people who are going to hold you accountable to the vision you have for yourself.

[13:15] - Of the three things Bryan set out to change, the one that had the biggest effect was the physical fitness. It’s been a huge avenue for growth - not only does he feel better physically, but he feels better about the role model he provides for his son, and he does his best thinking when he’s running. It also made the other aspects of his transformation easier.

[17:40] - Identity shifts can take a while for us to claim the new person. Bryan talks about his struggle with losing the identity of “the fat kid” and how he came to recognize and appreciate the new direction. It took him a while to get over that, and he sometimes still gets self-conscious and has some triggers that he’s learned how to overcome. Triggers are common for people who have gone through a big transformation - it’s all part of the process. But knowing how to recognize them and work on them is an important aspect of the transformation as well.

[25:40] - Bryan’s philosophy of “Do a Day” is about execution. There are three building blocks to the philosophy - firm foundation, structure, and strong stable ground. The strong stable ground is self-love, which is believing that you’re capable and believing that you deserve.

[27:10] - One exercise Bryan uses is called “stop the but.” As a society, we’re pretty self deprecating, and we don’t take compliments very well. The exercise focuses on saying “thank you” and receive the complement rather than adding what you think is wrong. If you struggle with accepting the compliment you can also ask what someone liked about what they’re complimenting and allow yourself to receive that.

[29:00] - The foundation is about your motivation. What is your reason and your purpose for transformation? Your foundation is the underlying drive that will push you to achieve what you really want to achieve. The question Bryan asks in his book is ‘no matter what else is happening, what will you always care about?’

[30:50] - The house, or structure, are your goals. Your goal should be something that’s really going to push you, but should still be realistic.

[31:50] - The execution comes with Do a Day. For ‘Day’, it’s not about specifically a day, but it’s about the present moment. It’s about a mindful approach that focuses on doing what we need to do in the present moment to pursue our goals, rather than focusing on what we didn’t do yesterday or what we still need to do tomorrow.

[34:00] - One question that comes up a lot of times in transformation by action is “how much a day is enough?” Both too little and too much can become non-motivating or unrealistic. Dissecting your ultimate goals into bite-size pieces can help you work through this. Bryan shares the example of his marathon training plan. If you structure a plan out, it can help guide you to know what success looks like for that day. There will be times when you underperform or over-perform. It’s important to keep these times in perspective and not let them affect what you do in the next present moment.

[41:20] - One of the reasons Bryan emphasizes the word “do” is because it encourages us to take action, rather than “just getting through it,” which isn’t necessarily the best way to live your life. To Bryan, “Do a day” is different from “one day at a time” because it focuses on the action piece. He would rather take action and change the game than just endure his life.

[44:15] - Are there situations that the do a day philosophy is not good for? Bryan thinks that it is pretty universal, but sometimes finds people who don’t apply it. He acknowledges that since he hasn’t experienced everything, he doesn’t know how it might apply in all situations. He has had readers speak out to him about some specific situations where they have found strength in the do a day philosophy.

[47:40] - A year after its release, Bryan is re-publishing his book. There a few things that have changed over the course of the year that he wants to address. One is the parenting chapter, and also adding in a section on self-love. Originally, he wasn’t conscious of the gap, but now it’s become obvious how important that is to include.

[53:10] - Which “do” is most challenging for Bryan these days? Bryan is involved in a lot - his day job, being a father and a husband, writing a book - and he’s worried he might be burning too hard. But he’s enjoying the impact he’s having on people’s lives right now.

[58:15] - Bryan’s challenge for listeners is to “stop the but.” Look at your words and thoughts and stop allowing for the possibility that you can be better and deserve to be better, and just let it be. Find people who will hold you accountable in this.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Do a Day: How to Live A Better Life, by Bryan Falchuk

The Dip, by Seth Godin

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On today’s episode, Angela returns to the show to talk with Charlie about boundaries. They did a joint presentation at the Think Better, Live Better conference, which was an interesting process for them. Since not all of their listeners were at the conference, they decided to bring a taste of their presentation to the podcast and share some of the concepts and lessons learned.

Key Takeaways:

[4:05] - Angela and Charlie decided that they wanted to talk about boundaries because they’ve been getting asked similar questions over the course of the decade they’ve been doing this work. The five keys that sort of govern their whole philosophy on becoming your best self in the world are: intentions, awareness, boundaries, courage, and discipline. They’re all interrelated, but boundaries come up frequently when we need to give ourselves space from things that aren’t helpful to us, and create space for the things that are helpful to our growth.

[8:03] - Most clients don’t realize that they need help with boundaries - sometimes what they need is externally driven, but what needs to be addressed are internal boundaries that will allow the other things to happen. Charlie gives the metaphor of the car and the driver; the trick is to know whether the problem lies with the car (ourselves), or the driver (our circumstances). Most often, it’s the driver.

[11:00] - The importance of boundaries is that drawing boundaries really allow us to get what we want and what we need in life. Putting the right things in place for the right reasons will allow us to get to the best results and best life.

[11:35] - One of the things that has come up for Angela is the fear that setting boundaries might push away the people we love, or that it might hurt somebody that we care about. The opposite usually ends up being true, and you’re enhancing the relationship with that person and making it stronger.

[13:15] - What’s the difference between positive and negative boundaries? Negative boundaries are the boundaries by which you push something away or put a wall up between yourself and other things. Positive boundaries create space around you for things that you want. It’s important to be intentional about what you’re creating space for, rather than just pushing people and things away. Boundaries don’t always have to do with relationships; it is also creating boundaries between ourselves and the noise that that may not be supporting us. Creating positive boundaries can be harder because we have to identify the things that are worth fighting for, and that in turn is a declaration that we ourselves are important, and our self-worth is a priority.

[16:30] - This self-worth piece is a very important aspect of setting boundaries. In order to set those boundaries, we have to be able to say this is what I’m worth, and what I want and need matters. These are things we often don’t tell ourselves, but creating boundaries can encourage more positive self-talk and self-worth. This is a practice and requires us to keep pushing to get what we need and want.

[20:20] - There seemed to be a very gendered dynamic in the people that came to talk with Charlie and Angela after their presentation at the conference. Women may struggle more with creating some of these positive boundaries because of some of the socialization in the world today. Angela was able to help people find a language that worked for them to help describe their boundaries to the people in their lives.

[21:25] - As we set boundaries, it sets a good example and allows us to be role models for our friends, and people in our communities and workplaces. When people see you setting boundaries, they’re drawn to that. They see you getting what you want and need, and making time for what’s important to you, and it gives them permission to do the same thing.

[24:15] - One of the struggles people have with boundaries is that it’s all very general. There are several different dimensions of your life that we can think about where we might want to implement boundaries. The key thing is wherever you are over-committed or depleted, you have a boundary issue. Be intentional about creating boundaries around those areas and think about what you’re trying to change in those areas for your boundaries to have real grip.

[27:10] - When setting boundaries, it’s important to think about ourselves as a whole. It’s important to think about all the dimensions - professional, personal, play - especially the ones where we don’t have good balance in our lives at the moment. Charlie and Angela talk about the importance of the “play” dimension; if it brings you joy and happiness, make it a priority!

[32:35] - Angela encourages the idea of working on one boundary at a time. As you’re thinking about boundaries for yourself and what that looks like, start with one thing or one area where things are out of balance. Set a boundary and work on it diligently rather than trying to set several at a time and getting burnt out.

[35:45] - Getting people on board with your boundaries is important from an accountability and support system perspective. We want to have important conversations with the people who matter most and invite them to support us in setting up new boundaries for ourselves. Charlie discusses some ways you can approach these conversations in a professional context, to help improve your work-life balance.

[42:10] - While today’s conversation is over, there is more to be said for our work on boundaries and how they can help us be our best selves in the world. Look out for a follow up post on this, and if you have any questions, email Charlie or Angela using the contact information below. The invitation/challenge for this episode is to start thinking about some of the dimensions mentioned and where you want to make a change in your life, and what type of boundary would support you in making that change.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Brene Brown - The Work of the People

Start Finishing Your Projects Course

charlie@productiveflourishing.com

angela@productiveflourishing.com

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Sharon Rowe is the founder of EcoBags, and an award-winning entrepreneur. She joins Charlie today to talk about what she’s learned in steering her almost 30 year career as an entrepreneur. They also discuss what’s different about today’s business landscape, the relationship between your why and your financial metrics, and how important going is for getting your business going.

Key Takeaways:

[2:00] - Sharon started EcoBags in 1989 because she saw a problem and felt that need to take care of it. At the time, she was a new mom and also working as an actress in New York City. She wanted to have an impact, and felt like reducing use of plastic bags would make an impact on the planet and starting her own business would allow her to have a flexible schedule and be in control of what she was promoting.

[3:45] - She had a limited business background, but her training as an actress helped prepare her for the possibility of failure, and gave her resilience to bounce back. All of this background helped to prepare her for what she calls “The Big Idea.”

[5:30] - EcoBags are sturdy, reusable bags that you can use again and again for groceries, gym clothes, etc. The idea is not to create any waste. Back when it started in 1989, it was an innovation in the United States. Many countries in Europe have taxes against plastic bags that have dramatically reduced use.

[8:05] - While she didn’t know how big it would get, Sharon knew it was something that had to happen, and knew that the idea would catch. But for Sharon, it’s not the business of reusable bags, it’s about the business of a cultural shift. Her top priorities were the cultural shift and having time to spend with her family.

[10:50] - For creative people and entrepreneurs, it’s easy to think about the product as a transactional type of thing. But every product is an embedded message or embedded social cue. Think about what you’re promoting and what cultural values you’re instilling.

[11:40] - EcoBags uses materials that are sustainably sourced and responsibly made. Sharon talks about how they are encouraged when other people copy this idea, even when it creates other competition, because overall the impact is a positive one in the right direction for the environment.

[13:30] - Business is a currency for your ideas. For creative people, it’s also your income. You have to protect your ideas and the integrity of your product. Engagement then becomes a big part of conducting business; as entrepreneurs we want to work together to address the issues of the world through our ideas (Sharon’s friend calls this “co-opetition”). If you’re giving, that’s when you’ll get.

[16:00] - Co-opetition and networking is super good business. When you celebrate other people, they are happy to celebrate you too. The more you get out into your community and begin making connections, you’ll find that people are really interesting in their business and in who they are. You never know where these connections are going to lead. Keep showing up, even if it’s uncomfortable.

[20:55] - You have to tell a story, and any kind of story stimulates curiosity. If you stimulate curiosity, you never know what kind of endorsements you might happen upon. If you show up to give, not to get, that’s when you get more in return.

[23:00] - What are the three major differences in starting and being in business now versus 30 years ago when EcoBags started? 1. It’s easier and less expensive to get going now because of the internet and all the tools that are there. 2. It is more challenging now to have your idea heard, and to find the right communities you need to speak to. 3. Today, you need to slow down and take stock of what you need to move forward focusing on your big “Why.” You really need to hook into this “Why” - why are you doing this, why does it matter to you, and how are you going to execute it?

[26:45] - The connection between the “Why” and your business metrics is that our culture requires us to support ourselves. How we choose to do this is a personal choice guided by structures that dictate a lot of the “how.” You get to pick and choose your life if you keep the “why” active by working with your forecast to build the road you want to be on. It’s the intentionality that’s tied to your “why,” how you want to live your “why,” and how that supports your “how.”

[31:30] - Charlie talks about the methodology behind Mr. Money Mustache, and about the importance of prioritizing. Being intentional about the choices you have to make will allow you to make the choices you want to make.

[34:00] - Many creative people feel that financial metrics and your vision and missions are at odds with each other. This isn’t true! You can use your financial metrics to set boundaries and figure out how you can open up your ideas to share with others and still maintain your vision and priorities.

[37:30] - Since starting the business, one of the toughest decisions Sharon’s had to make is hiring a CEO, and eventually firing them. The recession came right after they had a huge growth spurt, not only in profit and revenue, but also in their employee workforce. As the recession started to affect the people they did business with, things started to fall apart a bit and Sharon had to decide to bring someone else on boardm, and that person ended up getting them back on solid ground. In the long run, it didn’t work out because Sharon was having to do more to support him than it was worth financially, and that was another tough decision she had to make to let him go.

[42:25] - There have also been opportunities Sharon knew she should’ve taken, but didn’t. Part of this was understanding the expectations of your workforce (your employees working consistent hours and being compensated accordingly), and how that fits in with the expansion and contraction of business. During the recession, she realized she needed to trim faster and make adjustments to fit into what was going on around their business as well.

[47:15] - Businesses need to be stronger on process now than they used to; you can choose to operate lean in the beginning, or you can wait to run lean until you’re forced to. Running lean by choice from the beginning can prevent having to let people go in times of recession. For EcoBags, they were affected by many of the businesses they serve also facing the effects of the recession.

[49:32] - One of the most unanticipated challenges that Sharon is currently facing is growing the business. They have some of the same customers they’ve had for 30 years, as well as new customers coming in every day. But she is finding that in business today, you have to get someone’s attention, be put into their workflow, and then you have to service them. At this point, it is incumbent on you to keep that relationship going. Finding and maintaining the new relationships is the tough part.

[54:35] - In an effort to dive into your “why” and execute your “how” into something sustainable that supports your life, Sharon’s invitation for listeners is to read her new book (link below) and share it with others. As members of the creative community, work to make this community more visible, because that’s where the ideas come from.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

EcoBags

Sharon Rowe

The Magic of Tiny Business, by Sharon Rowe

Mr. Money Mustache

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Tama Kieves is the best-selling author of four books, with her latest being Thriving Through Uncertainty: Moving Beyond Fear of the Unknown and Making Change Work for You. She joins Charlie on the show today to talk about the mindset and practice shifts that we need to embrace to not let fear of uncertainty keep us from moving forward to the life that awaits us. The conversation is full of creative paradoxes, such as how showing up sometimes means not doing your work, how undoing is the doing that most needs to be done, and how we have to find the courage to be inspired while inspiration gives us courage.

Key Takeaways:

[1:37] - So many creative people don’t realize that they get stuck and stopped by their fear of uncertainty. When we’re uncertain, we might choose from our weaknesses or listen to a voice other than our own, rather than drawing on our strengths and our genius.

[2:33] - Tama knew she wanted to write ever since she was young. Her family upbringing didn’t necessarily encourage this path, and she ended up going to law school at Harvard and was on a partnership track in a major law firm, but it felt meaningless. A friend encouraged her to think about how successful she could be doing something she loved, and that’s how she got started down the path of authorship.

[4:17] - Her latest book was inspired by people who are living their dreams, and she kept seeing that people didn’t know how to handle uncertainty. We often play smaller or choose less than we deserve. Tama noticed these things in herself as well, and realized that life is all about uncertainty - especially if we’re growing or shifting. Her goal of the book is to help people thrive right now rather than when that client signs on, or that next check comes in.

[7:15] - So many times people get disappointed, and think that that moment of disappointment is going to be the rest of their lives. To live an inspired life is to choose to begin again in this moment and be original rather than choose based on your past, but listen to what your instinct and intuition is saying right now.

[8:05] - Tama faced some of these uncertainties while she was writing this book. When these things came up, she stopped writing and stopped caring about writing and let the negative story dominate her thinking. When she started writing again anyway, all of sudden she remembered who she was and what she was here for and her strength was renewed.

[11:10] - What are some of the common stories that come up about uncertainty? It’s not always uncertainty that’s really bothering us, it’s the certainty of what we’re telling ourselves - we’re too old, we don’t have the education, we don’t have the technical skills, etc. We don’t realize these are stories, but rather relate to them as fact. There is a moment when we choose which story we are going to tell ourselves. Often times, the negative stories may seem practical or logical, but if they don’t make us feel powerful or excited, they are not in our best interest. There is already a deeper story inside all of us and it’s really about listening to it.

[14:40] - We seem to have a negative bias - when we’re looking at the same bit of data, we more often choose the negative story when there’s equal evidence. We are looking to prove our beliefs true, and we’re not consciously and deliberately choosing to tell ourselves different stories, then we are unconsciously always proving the limited story.

[16:30] - We can’t plan an inspired life. It is an instinctive path, not linear. We are creating future possibilities for ourselves, and sometimes we’re creating something we can’t see yet. Tama tells the story of writing her first book and how after she took the chance and self-published the book, someone found it and got it to a big publisher that bought the book exactly the way it was. If she had done it the conventional way, it wouldn’t have turned out the same way.

[21:10] - We won’t know what we love or don’t love, what has energy or doesn’t have energy, until we try and explore things. The joy of living an inspired life is that we discover and uncover it as we go. Dare to try something, and pay attention to how it makes you feel.

[22:55] - We owe it to ourselves to make braver choices. When we’re scared and uncertain, we start thinking weaker and make more limited choices. Hold big and brave goals for yourself, but don’t judge yourself if you’re scared, or if it’s awkward, or if it’s hard.

[25:15] - What is the connection between inspiration and courage? Firstly, you have to have courage to choose the inspiration, especially when everything is weighing on you not to. When you take an inspired action, it often ignites something else in you, and give you fierceness and courage you didn’t even know you had. It is a paradox of having courage first to take the action, and then being encouraged by having made the choice. Charlie talks about the Shambhala tradition of Wind Horse, and how it relates to this paradox.

[29:50] - In her course about living in love instead of fear, Tama talks about how it’s not what we think we can do, but rather what we’re willing to do. We can choose from our smaller selves, or we can choose from our grander, higher selves.

[32:00] - Sometimes courage doesn’t always come from love; sometimes it comes from desperation. When you’re not doing your calling, there will be pain. This can serve as a reminder that you’re here for more.

[34:30] - In this society, there is so much pressure about success and failure. Showing up is sometimes the only success there is. We are constantly redefining what success and failure is for ourselves. Tama’s definition of success is knowing that she is doing the right thing with her time on Earth.

[37:00] - Another paradox is that sometimes showing up doesn’t mean showing up for your work, but rather showing up for yourself. One thing that Tama talks about in her book is how we have to be “unfaithful, sporadic, and unusually true” to ourselves. It’s not so much about what we’re doing, but about the beliefs we have to undo. Part of this undoing is being kind to ourselves, relaxing, and resting. It is okay to break your vows to yourself, but always dare to come back again.

[40:45] - There is another paradox here. There are times and places to be disciplined about your practices, but when you’re on a growth edge, that’s the time to be sporadic and unfaithful because you’re trying to change something about yourself. These paradoxes give us permission to experiment and explore our own rhythm rather than impose it.

[41:45] - What Tama is trying to cultivate in her books and through her work, is a deeper listening for when the path feels right and when it doesn’t. Deeper listening to what you need in that moment creates a deeper faith and trust in yourself as well. Charlie shares his experience with trying to reach his goal of 1000 words on his book, and facing the choice moment of whether to continue or stop and get recharged.

[44:55] - For Tama, it’s more important that we’re cultivating a relationship with ourselves than that we’re meeting a certain goal. Many times we’re forcing a goal and overdoing it, and it’s no longer fun. Take tiny steps, and that will help you move.

[48:15] - Tama has a technique called “inspired self-dialogues.” This is a journaling technique where she journals her fears and then speaks back in a loving voice. That voice will always see it differently.

[50:30] - Another one of her other techniques and strategies in the book is the “win list.” In this technique, you write down 5 or 10 wins that you have each day. Wins can be both internal and external. Writing down the wins starts training your brain to look for those things.

[52:40] - Another technique to get in touch with creative ideas is “free writing.” This is when you keep your journaling going or keep typing on your laptop and don’t edit it - it’s like a stream of consciousness. You can’t listen to self-judgment and inspiration at the same time. Free writing bypasses that because you’re not allowing yourself time to judge.

[53:35] - One of the biggest sources of uncertainty Tama is currently facing is her goal to always pursue her business on an inspired path. It is a constant struggle of being in times where it’s working, and times of going back into her fear.

[58:15] - Tama’s “dare” for listeners is to do the most loving thing you could possibly do for yourself. Listen to what you think is a frivolous voice inside yourself, and know that it’s not frivolous, but it’s imperative.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Tama Kieves

Books by Tama Kieves

Thriving Through Uncertainty, by Tama Kieves

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Christina is an attorney who wanted a more creative path, and started The Contract Shop, a contract template store for creative entrepreneurs, wedding professionals, and coaches. In this episode, Christina and Charlie discuss her transition from the risk-averse field of law into entrepreneurship, the challenges she faces as a new entrepreneur, and how the way many of us think about the legal aspects of our business is actually out of sync with reality.

Key Takeaways:

[2:05] - The legal aspect of a creative business can be a way to enhance relationships, rather than create adversarial and complicated relationships.

[2:35] - Christina works as an attorney, but her entrepreneurial side took off by accident. When she was running her law firm, she encountered situations where her friends needed legal help, but not necessarily her full time or attention as an attorney. At the same time, she had started to accumulate different templates that she was able to share with her friends, and it turned into a nuanced template business called The Contract Shop.

[4:30] - As a tip for all creative entrepreneurs, if you’re looking for additional revenue streams, look around for your trap content that could have market value. The best products are based on need; Christina didn’t think much of her templates, but they’ve become an asset she built an entire business around.

[7:55] - Christina talks about risk - as an attorney, they were taught that they needed to be risk averse. This is opposite in nature from the entrepreneur, where sometimes you have to take a risk to be successful.

[14:30] - Out of law school, Christina found a job but was worn thin from law school, working full time, studying for the bar, and jumping in to The Contract Shop. As an escape, she started a yoga blog, and incorporated legal articles and business stuff on this blog.

[18:40] - Even though she’s working just as much as (or more than) before when everything was taking off, there is a lot more freedom now that Christina is working for herself. If you find work that lights you up, it changes everything. It’s much easier to get stuff done when it’s something that ties into who you are and the work you’re wanting to do in the world.

[21:55] - Christina talks about some of the things she missed about working for someone else when she first started working for herself. The biggest thing was having a boss, and someone to tell her what to do to advance her business. She was also so focused on seeing what other people were doing that it was difficult to focus on her own stuff. She has since narrowed it down to one or two people to follow at a time and is staying focused on her own business. If you’re a new entrepreneur and you’re finding yourself in the same “honeymoon” or “deinstitutional” period, know that it’s normal, but try get yourself out of it as quickly as you can because it can be an expensive period of your business.

[27:40] - When you first start working for yourself, there comes a point at which you have to start defining your own goals. Christina uses a tool from one of her clients called PowerSheets to help define where she’s been and where she’s going. One thing that works well for her is putting the things she’s thinking about or working through down on paper, and trusting that the sequence will work itself out for them to come to fruition.

[30:40] - Strategic planning is a skill, like financial planning, and not one that everyone learns. Coming into your own business, they may be things that you have to learn, but the beauty of it is that they are skills that can be learned by normal people. If long-term planning is not a strong suit for you, planning smaller is okay.

[34:45] - Creative people and entrepreneurs have a bit of fear surrounding the legal aspects of their business. Some people don’t touch it or take it super seriously. Christina’s approach uses the legal aspect to enhance relationships. If people are too cautious about this aspect, they may never get their product out there. Christina encourages people to just start doing it, even if all the legal I’s and T’s aren’t dotted and crossed.

[38:50] - Christina’s two big tips: 1) The fastest way to get yourself into legal trouble in today’s social media climate is to use someone else’s photo as your own without permission. Pay attention to what other people’s intellectual property is and avoid infringing someone’s copyright. Christina has actually garnered relationships reaching out to people to ask if she could use their photos. 2) If you’re not clear on what you expect from your clients and what they can expect from you, that’s a great way to start losing money through refund requests, etc. Instead of over-promising and under-delivering, make sure you’re under-promising and over-delivering, and have some kind of contract that memorializes the expectations for both parties.

[42:10] - Usually first-time offenders will receive a cease and desist letter. If it’s the second or third time you’ll be on higher watch. You can get into trouble really quickly if you go up against any of the big guys.

[43:30] - If these legal aspects are what’s scaring you from getting started, the risk and the exposure is not as big as you might think. It’s better to get out there and start doing something, and then if you encounter problems make sure you address them. Don’t let it keep you from creating something. You can also invest in business insurance as a form of protection.

[45:20] - Another aspect of working for yourself is the contracts. Most peoples’ only experience with an attorney is in an unfortunate situation or what’s portrayed in the media, so business owners may be afraid to address contracts with their clients. Show them that contracts are actually for the client’s benefit, and make sure you walk them through the contract and talk them through how things could play out. If you show them that you’re an experienced professional on the terms, it will be a better experience for everyone. There are ways to present the contract in a less scary way, like the client magazines Christina mentions.

[51:00] - This gives you an opportunity to show your client that you are more professional than your competition. It makes you a better salesperson and a better business person. It’s usually the first time your client is going through whatever situation it is, so having an extra touch point where you’re showing them stuff that might be obvious for you can ensure trust for the rest of your working relationship.

[53:00] - There are some common excuses Christina hears. 1. If there’s fear of confrontation, do what you can with what you have. You can send an email and a PDF. 2. If you’re worried about a client wasting your time, take a look earlier on in your sales process and see how you’re qualifying those leads, and be unapologetically yourself. 3. Money - money is a mindset issue and money can always be made. Sometimes you just have to prioritize the things that are going to move your business (or life) forward. Be mindful of which types of expenses you’re prioritizing as well.

[57:54] - Christina’s challenge to listeners is to do one thing every day for the next week, whether it takes one minute or one hour of your time, that moves your business, creative process, or your career forward.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Productive Flourishing Podcast Episode 78: The 3 Essential Pieces of Your Business’s Legal, Tax, and Financial Foundation with Kyle Durand

Christina Scalera

Christina Scalera’s Blog

The Contract Shop

The Small Business Lifestyle, by Charlie Gilkey

Lara Casey PowerSheets

MagCloud

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Today’s guest, Debbie Reber, is a New York Times best-selling author, podcaster, and speaker. She joins Charlie today to discuss how she made the transition from working in television to becoming a best-selling author, and how the birth of her neurologically-different son altered her body of work and how she got it done. While her work is geared toward parents of neuro-diverse children, this is a great episode for everyone because it shows how sticking with your work and listening to where it’s taking you can blossom into new and unexpected opportunities.

Key Takeaways:

[2:23] - Debbie started her career in TV, then she started writing, and her writing shifted. She did video production for international relief organizations, and moved into kid’s TV, and eventually decided that she wanted to write a book. Throughout all of these, she was pursuing other side projects that provided a different level of personal fulfillment. Fifteen years later, she’s still writing books.

[6:12] - Debbie is finally at a point in her life where her career and her desires are woven together, and aspects of her past careers inform every aspect of her current work.

[7:53] - Her work has always sort of revolved around marginalized groups in general, though she is pulled more in the direction of kids and teens. She worked in kid’s media, has volunteered and focused on working with underprivileged teen girls, and of course, is mom to her son Asher.

[11:00] - Debbie’s son Asher is thirteen now, and what she calls “differently wired.” He has diagnoses of ADHD, Asperger’s, and is also profoundly gifted. As her only child, Asher gets a lot of her attention. As he was growing up, routine things took longer than normal, and Debbie had to learn how to be in work mode but drop things at a moment’s notice to attend to her son. There was a struggle prioritizing her work time with time for her son and also her own self-care. During this time though (2002-2016), she published 9 or 10 books, so she remained very productive during these years.

[16:42] - A lot of creative people get to the point where they wait for a period of time where things calm down and say that’s when they’ll be able to do their work, so they don’t do it in the current moment. There can still be some great work done in the moments of chaos. For Debbie, she refused to let her personal work be impacted by the other things going on in her life.

[19:05] - A lot of creative people have some sort of mindfulnesses practice, as well as an athletic or discipline practice. Being a runner is a huge part of who Debbie is, and it keeps her emotionally and mentally healthy. Her unapologetic nature about running transfers to other aspects of her life, where she sets goals and works for them, no turning back. For listeners, find a discipline that you can get into. The benefit will be great!

[21:40] - Debbie shares about the transition between sending Asher to school and the decision to homeschool him. Schools never seemed to be a good fit, and when Debbie’s family had an opportunity to move overseas, they made the decision to start homeschooling. She speaks about how it was scary, but she knew it was the right thing to do.

[25:35] - Debbie started the Tilt Parenting website and podcast shortly after their move overseas. While raising Asher, she had trouble accessing information about how to navigate the journey of raising her son. She knew that she wanted to bring that information to other people eventually, and things fell into place for her to launch her Tilt platform, rather than waiting until the book was finished.

[29:59] - It didn’t occur to Debbie to start Tilt earlier because she wasn’t ready to give up her work with teens. When they made the move to Amsterdam, it helped her to look at things in a different light and she made the space for a new body of work. She had to make a conscious choice to sort of let the work with teens go and dive into the new work for differently wired kids that was very personal to her.

[36:18] - The idea for Tilt came from a moment when Debbie was at the Jersey Shore with her family and they rode the Tilt-A-Whirl. The name captures the idea of holding on and not necessarily knowing where things are going, as well as the idea that we need to tilt our perspective and allow differently wired children to tilt the future.

[37:45] - At the very least, 1 in 5 kids in the US are differently wired. That’s a lot of kids, and even more parents. For the number of people affected, the resources really aren’t there for people to access. Often in the school system, these kids are seen as inconveniences because they require different accommodations.

[41:05] - Debbie talks about how parents of differently wired kids are sometimes divided into different groups and compared against each other, which sort of forces them to be kept silent. One of the things she wanted to encourage with Tilt is to unite parents to advocate for the kids.

[43:15] - Some of the disparities in our education system is that there are a lot of kids with different needs and capabilities, and the standard bell curve doesn’t really work for them (or many kids, at that). What makes it tricky for differently wired kids is that how they are is seen as a behavioral challenge, when really it’s how they cope and move through the world.

[48:36] - Alternative education (like homeschooling) is not always an option for differently wired kids. It is important to figure out ways to work within the system and help both kids and parents learn how to advocate for their education. Debbie encourages parents to adopt a questioning mindset to explore experiences and create intention in behaviors.

[53:40] - Debbie talks about the fluency map she created for her and Asher, and how it helps the parents and child become fluent in each other’s language. If parents become fluent in their child’s language and are attuned to little signs, then that can foster more trust and security in the way they relate to each other. It may also be helpful for the parents to share their language with their kids.

[58:10] - Tilt is coming out June 2018, but has been finished since last July. In this book in particular, since the book was so personal and important, the process was more difficult than some of her other books. Since it’s been finished, Debbie has been focusing on her podcast and growing the audience of people they can reach.

[1:01:00] - All creators know that when you finally finish whatever project you’re working on, you’re ready to show the work off. It can be hard when you have to wait to share the finished product. It’s a normal thing that happens, but it’s important to find a way to get back into the fight while you’re waiting.

[1:06:40] - Debbie’s challenge for listeners is to recognize and start noticing our own implicit biases we might have against neuro-diverse people. Be aware of one point judgement starting to come in and where your default thoughts go, and invite curiosity on how you might approach the situation in a way that will begin to accept and embrace these people.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Debbie Reber

Books by Debbie Reber

Tilt Parenting

Understood

Productive Flourishing Podcast Episode 169 - Penelope Trunk: Asperger's, Creativity, and the Education System

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Ryan Haack is a writer, speaker, and blogger who was also born with one hand. Today’s episode is a re-run of episode 45, which is a Productive Flourishing favorite because it highlights that we’re each different, but it’s how we handle our differences that makes all the difference. Ryan uses what makes him different to inspire kids, parents, and teachers to explore how being different isn’t just something to cope with, but how being different is awesome.

Key Takeaways:

[2:05] – Ryan started his website, Living One Handed, back in 2011. It goes back to him being born without one hand, but consciously, this fact didn’t make a difference in his life for a long time. After an encounter at a restaurant with a mom and her son who was also born without a hand, he decided to use his online presence to help reach others and make a difference.

[4:41] – Growing up, Ryan had an incredibly supportive family, school, and friends, and his physical handicap wasn’t a big deal to them because it wasn’t a big deal to Ryan. Starting the website challenged him to think about the fact that there are other people out there like him, and then figure out what kinds of struggles they face and how he could help.

[7:20] – When we have an aspect of ourselves that’s different from the majority, we often have a double veil: the way we see ourselves and the way other people see us. For Ryan, he didn’t really have the veil of how other people saw him.

[9:19] – Ryan’s left arm comes down just past his elbow, with the ability to bend it. He broke this arm and now has a steel plate and seven screws in it. Ryan has always been open about his limb difference. It really makes a difference in how people react and how they want to engage. Ryan embraces vulnerability and tries to be gracious, because he is in a position where he can also teach people.

[14:30] – Ryan shares an example of his job in the hardware store and instances where he used to refuse help. Once you get comfortable enough with yourself that you know you can do things independently, you start to realize you don’t really have anything to prove. It can be easier to accept help then – this is a lesson we can all learn.

[16:50] – In our society, there is a stigma attached to getting help from other people. We often view receiving help as being weak, and we don’t allow people who want to help us to give us that extra bit that we need. In the case of our differences, maybe it’s because we don’t want them to be on display.

[19:15] – In a community made of people who have a visible difference, words are huge. There is a dual nature of “I’m not any different than you” but also bringing awareness to the fact that they are different from you. With his book, Ryan wants to encourage people to claim their differences and celebrate that being different is awesome.

[21:38] – It is our differences that make us awesome and beautiful. They are not something that need to be hidden away. If we can’t talk about it, we can’t be seen.

[22:00] - Ryan did a Kickstarter for his book, Different Is Awesome. After some experiences at his younger brother’s school and meetings with some other authors, he realized the idea he wanted to bring to life. Kickstarter seemed like a good platform because the book had specific appeal, but a broad message that could reach a lot of people.

[25:18] - The Kickstarter project was a massive success. There was a lot of pre-launch work, and Ryan attributes a lot of the success to the short video they shot. The target amount they wanted to raise was $25,000, and he ended up with over 500 backers and made over $29,000.

[28:55] - The message of Different Is Awesome is that different is awesome, and it shares the story of a little boy who brings his brother to class so they can ask him questions, and all the kids who are asking questions have something that makes them different. In the end, it fosters the discussion that we’re all different somehow, and encourages people to recognize and respect each others’ differences.

[30:38] - Everyone is valuable just as they are. If we value ourselves, we will therefore value other people, and we’ll treat them that way. What Ryan stands for is helping other people believe that they are valuable, so it changes their lives and that of those around them.

[34:26] - Ryan hopes people will feel encouraged and valuable based on the work he’s doing, and that he can provide hope and courage to them.

Additional Links:

Productive Flourishing

Ryan Haack

Different is Awesome, by Ryan Haack

Ryan’s Podcast

The Art of Asking, by Amanda Palmer

Harry and Willy And Carrothead, by Judith Caseley

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Carey and Demir Bentley are the founders of Life Hack Bootcamp. This husband and wife team joins Charlie to talk about how radical self-care is the key to unlocking better work and more happiness. This topic is important to us all, because so many people think about their work as getting more work done – often, at the expense of living a better life. Both Charlie’s and Carey and Demir’s businesses center on helping people live rich, flourishing lives – to do that, you often have to shift your focus from your work, to your life.

Key Takeaways:

[2:25] – “The end of all human action is flourishing.” – Aristotle made this point to convey that we do things to thrive; we’re not just doing stuff for the sake of doing stuff. We often get into the habit of thinking that if we just get stuff done, the self-care, flourishing and thriving will happen. This usually does not end up being the case.

[3:30] – In a Protestant work-ethic culture, there is a dangerous attitude about work: work is its own reward and you don’t need any rest. A deeper aspect of this culture is that your happiness and salvation also rely upon how hard you work. However, studies show that the most successful people don’t overwork themselves, and they value rest and self-care.

[6:17] – If you buy into this culture, it can become a vicious cycle of always working to obtain the next level of happiness – it doesn’t encourage us to be content with where we are. In reality, the amount that we work and push ourselves is not correlated with how happy we are. Taking time for self-care can actually help you achieve rapid results without overworking yourself. There are two moments when people usually surge ahead: the first, when someone is sick of their work, but the more important one is after they’ve come off a long period of rest.

[9:10] – Whenever there is a gap between focusing on getting something done and moving to something else, we have a tendency to fill it with something. We don’t know how to just allow ourselves five minutes to sit and think or chill out; we have to be doing something. It’s not enough to just take time off; it’s important to ask yourself if that time is truly restful.

[12:50] – Charlie discusses how his metrics of productivity have shifted now that he has his book deal. This has allowed him to do a qualitative audit of how he spends his time. Back in June, he set some new parameters for himself to avoid burnout, and when evaluating how it was going, his new metric became not necessarily what the category of work was, but rather how much he enjoyed it. When deciding how to spend your non-working time, it’s important to pick something that rejuvenates and replenishes your energy, not something that drains it. Often times, what’s comfortable is not nourishing, and what’s nourishing is not comfortable.

[18:30] – When you’re thinking about self-care, you might have to introduce a little more work in the sense that you pick an activity that may not be comfortable to do (exercise, for example), but that has payoff at the end.

[18:55] – Carey and Demir started a new course called FAST Force, which focuses on time mastery as four aspects that work together: Focus, Attitude, Stamina and Time. You have to have and use all four of these things to achieve time mastery. They have people budget out all the hours in the week, not just their working hours.

[23:05] – What’s missing in the productivity conversation these days is that you have to operate powerfully so that you can live powerfully. Sometimes it’s the reverse, and you have to live powerfully to operate powerfully. Charlie, Demir, and Carey share how this has played out in their lives with regards to career and lifestyle.

[27:00] – When talking about personal change and self-mastery, you have to dial in what motivates you. As you move forward, you have to decide whether you’re willing to give something that you value up in order to make a change. In Charlie’s experience, most people aren’t willing to give up the thing they enjoy, but this allows them to create a firmer boundary so they are able to keep it and modify something else.

[30:15] – Commit yourself to the things you want to do that will rejuvenate you, and that becomes a solid thing in your calendar. This will help ensure you get to do it every day, rather than leaving it as something you will do if you have time after work. Where people really get rejuvenated is when they have self-time alone doing the things that fill them up. The things that really fill our cup don’t cost anything.

[32:05] – If you do feel the urge that you need to be more successful, ask yourself what’s driving that. A lot of times, our underlying attitudes can sabotage us without us even realizing it. Demir talks about the movie Office Space. The lesson of the movie is that when you decide first who you want to be and how you want to live, and then restructure work around that, it’s the beginning of tremendous success. This is how Carey and Demir have been able to create their flourishing lifestyle that brings them joy in both work and play.

[36:00] – You don’t have to wait for the burn out or a wake-up call to start making the incremental changes that will benefit your self-care and make your life better. We find that when we really dig into what makes successful and happy people successful and happy, it’s the little things that they’ve made time to do that revive them. Give yourself the space to want what you want, and optimize yourself around that. It doesn’t mean you have to give up your success; it could actually be the start of the most successful times of your life.

[42:45] – If you’re listening to this and it’s a lot to take in, you may not have found that thing that primes the pump for you. It’s about finding the activities that will help you make the most of the 168 hours you’re given in the week. Programming your personal time can help you enjoy it more.

[46:00] - There are some areas in life where a scarcity mindset is beneficial. Time is a precious resource, and when we value our time, we allocate it with care and intention. There is enough time to be a good parent, a good business person, or a good person in your community, but you really have to get into a positive scarcity mindset.

[49:35] - Carey is a huge proponent of integrating your work to-do list with your personal to-do list. Put everything on one to-do list and prioritize it all together. When there’s a reason, we find ourselves doing miraculous feats of productivity.

[54:10] - If it’s worth doing, it’s worth planning to do. Whatever activity you’re doing, do it extremely. Make it worth your time and attention. What is an extreme example of being a good employee, or an extreme example of a good parent? Being extreme is a fundamental underpinning of how we think about approaching life.

[59:24] – Carey’s challenge for listeners is to think about one thing that you’ve always pushed away from yourself as being too silly or childish, or a dream that you’ve had, and take an action that commits you to that. Chunk it down to something you can get a taste of in 15 minutes. Demir challenges listeners to realize that life is precious, and we don’t know how long we’ll be here. Really step into that emotionally and fully appreciate the 168 God-given hours each week. Ask yourself what you would do if you had to apply for a new 168 hours each week.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Lifehack Bootcamp

Deep Work, by Cal Newport

10% Happier, by Dan Harris

Triggers, by Marshall Goldsmith

5 Love Languages, by Gary Chapman

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Barb Suarez is a health educator who specializes in the transformational events of pregnancy, birth, and parenting. She joins Charlie and Angela today to talk about the often unspoken realities of new parenthood, including how the process is identity-shaping for all three people, how to have a smooth transition that increases bonding, and how parenting and childbirth have shifted since the rise of the Internet and social media. If you’re thinking about having kids, in the process of having kids, have kids or have loved ones having kids, there are takeaways here that will help ensure that parents are doing their best to focus on what works best for them.

Key Takeaways:

[1:55] - Having a child is one of the most transformational events that happens in any person’s life. It is an identity-changing process for many of the people involved, and that can create some tension in different ways. It is a great time of transformation, but a lot of it comes down to how much people are willing to lean in and embrace that kind of transformation.

[4:05] - Barb tells her story of how she landed in this line of work. Growing up, she was more of a tomboy than anything. When she experienced the birth of a dear friend’s child for the first time, she realized how much power she had as a woman to be a co-creator in the experience of birth.

[5:37] - Barb is a health educator who specializes in childbirth preparation and new parenting. She started teaching her classes about twenty years ago. She feels lucky to be in a profession that is well-suited to who she is and what her strengths are, which doesn’t come around for everyone. In the last year, she has turned her blog into a full-blown website, and she’s starting to embark on moving her work out into the community.

[8:40] - Somewhere in the pregnancy or after the birth, there is a moment of clarity and revelation where the magnitude of taking care of a whole other human being really hits you. A sense of vulnerability kicks in, and it seems to be amplified in this generation, due to the internet. The parenting that happened pre-internet and post-internet and social media are two very different things. Today, there is so much information available on parenting, but you have to discern what is right for yourself. Additionally, on social media, people typically only share the good stuff, rather than the challenges many parents are probably facing.

[12:30] - One of the things Barb is most invested in through her work is helping people be okay with vulnerability, because it doesn’t go away. Seeking out what works best for a client and their family gives them something to rally around. Be careful about comparing your experiences to that of someone you read about on the internet, because they are curating the experience they want you to see, not necessarily their reality.

[15:15] - Barb describes some of the ways she works to create a safe space for parents when there is so much misinformation out there, as well as external (and internal) judgement. Barb tries to create a sense of community in her classes by fostering camaraderie right from the beginning. She is very honest about the reality of birth, and how they can control their reaction to how everything unfolds. Throughout this process, it’s important to encourage curiosity and flexibility, as well as leaning into that vulnerability.

[19:05] - She also encourages them not to plan, which is a big challenge for this generation. People want certainty. With an event like birth, even if you have a plan, the birth will unfold as it’s going to unfold. If it doesn’t go according to plan, you may be disappointed or even traumatized. Barb talks about how our brains interfere in these situations and can change our perceptions and how we react after the fact.

[27:20] - In life in general, if you want to avoid being frustrated and upset, you can have low expectations. But the hardest and best thing to do is to have no expectations, and just be open to what happens. This is especially important to keep in mind when it comes to childbirth and the many ways it can unfold. Barb discusses medical intervention and how its use can lead to beautiful births.

[31:15] - Does the vulnerability show up differently for new moms and dads? For many partners, childbirth might be the first time they really feel helpless. Barb tries to simulate and show what the experience will look like and be for the partner, so they will know what to expect. She also tries to highlight how the vulnerabilities will show up for the pregnant lady and her partner, so they can have a shared perspective.

[36:06] - After the birth, there still may be different vulnerabilities. The pregnant woman has a head start on the events of pregnancy and childbirth. For her partner, it often doesn’t become real until the baby arrives.

[37:00] - Her new classes are called “Becoming Us,” and one of the pieces they talk about is the process of catching up on the partner’s side, and addressing the change so they can get on the same page. This discrepancy can be a sense of shame and frustration for the partner, and maybe frustration for the birthing partner. They also talk about some of the things that are different for the mother and partner post-childbirth (partners often don’t get to be off work for extended periods of time, and only the mother breastfeeds) that still need to be taken into account when finding the shared perspective amongst their vulnerabilities.

[42:17] - It is important to welcome partners into the parenting role, not by telling them how to do it, but by helping them figure out what they’re going to be an expert at. The two parents need to work together to figure out what each person’s strengths are, and which tasks they are going to divide and conquer, and support each other.

[44:30] - The transition when the partner comes home is an important time to work together to smooth out the dynamic so it’s a productive and smooth transition. Some tips for this are to: 1. Give a heads up if it’s been a rough day and 2. Hold your baby outward facing when you catch up with your partner so the baby can start making connections, so they will feel comfortable when you hand the baby off. There’s a transition time that needs to happen for the entire family.

[47:00] - A couple’s relationship can, and often will, take a hit on the other side of having a baby. It is important to normalize this because it is common among many couples. It’s not bad, but it can be hard. On the other hand, this event also has a possibility of creating a much deeper connection than you’ve ever experienced before as a couple.

[49:46] - Overcoming adversity when there is a shared mission builds teams. Talking about the challenges you face can help you find a group to support you. Barb encourages couples to find a live and local tribe where you can share your successes and failures. Parents are almost all of the time trying to do the very best they can - sometimes they nail it, and other days it gets the best of them (sometimes, this happens all in the same day). Part of it is just about looking for the lessons of life as you’re going through this experience.

[57:33] - Barb leaves us with this: stop worrying about what everyone else is thinking. Instead, find out what is working for you, stand behind it, don’t judge other people, and just carry on with some level of self-confidence and lessened anxiety.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Barb Suarez

Barb’s Blog: Birth Happens

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Today’s show features Andrea Owen, proud author of 52 Ways to Live a Kick-Ass Life and How to Stop Feeling Like Shit: 14 Habits That are Holding You Back From Happiness. Andrea joins Charlie today to talk about the habits and shame stories that hold us back from success. In this episode, they discuss how our stories, habits, and coping mechanisms lead us further away from being able to catch ourselves in the moment. **Disclaimer: this episode contains cable-friendly language, so be conscious of where and when you are listening.

Key Takeaways:

[2:40] - Her second book was a bit of a deviation from her first book, focusing on a different sort of pain point. The subject matter for the second book sort of found her, but she also listened to feedback from her clients, women in her community, and herself about things that they were struggling with. She started to notice and observe patterns and behaviors in her life and in those around her.

[6:00] - Sometimes when writing a book you notice things that come up for you that you may not have been aware of before. Andrea originally thought she didn’t struggle with imposter complex (attributing success or accomplishments to luck or connections), but through the process of writing her book she realized that she did.

[7:18] - Men and women experience imposter syndrome differently; women often experience the social aspect of being invested in what other people think as well as the competency aspect. Men don’t experience the social aspect quite as much. Charlie and Andrea talk about some of the consequences of these experiences, specifically when it comes to leadership. Andrea shares a specific example of one of her clients and how she perceived a situation in her annual review versus how a man might perceive the same situation.

[13:25] - In cases like Andrea’s client, sometimes this can open doors to having hard conversations that may be awkward, but could help clarify the situation. The conversations don’t automatically need to be confrontational - healthy communication will never go out of style.

[17:37] - Out of the 14 habits featured in her book, one of the most common that comes up is isolating and hiding out. This is when we’re in crisis or in some kind of struggle, and we think about reaching out to someone for help but we allow our self-talk to convince us we don’t need to tell anyone. Sometimes it’s because we’re ashamed of our personal struggle, or we’re worried about being a burden to someone else. These traits are very common, along with numbing out.

[22:10] - As soon as we get uncomfortable, we start building and adding steps to get away from the discomfort. This can form a spiral where we become busy to avoid something and then when we’re ready to handle it, we’re too busy. Sometimes you have to strip those things away and just sit with the discomfort (or shame, boredom, or other emotion) and allow yourself to experience it and decide what you’re going to do with it. Sitting with these emotions can allow you to discover what you’re really avoiding.

[24:15] - Discomfort isn’t the problem; it’s the feeling that we shouldn’t be uncomfortable that’s the problem. As we allow ourselves to experience the discomfort, we begin to expand our comfort zones. When we are presented with more challenges, we can choose to coast through, or embrace the challenge and grow to the next level.

[26:48] - Charlie and Andrea discuss post-accomplishment depression. People may experience this after they reach a big goal they’ve been working toward. This affects how people feel about themselves, and often prevents them from talking to others about it.

[29:45] - When we participate in behaviors like perfectionism, control, people-pleasing, etc, we’re allowing shame to be the ringleader. We manifest those habits to avoid shame, when we’re actually allowing it to control us. The win Andrea wants for people is to know - when you’re in that moment - that you’re doing something because of a shame trigger, and realign yourself to how you really want to be showing up in that moment.

[32:52] - We want to shine the light on things that are uncomfortable, and focus on aspects of ourselves that we think are unloveable. Focus on one thing at a time - don’t try to tackle it all at once.

[36:02] - We often praise busyness and busy work, but it’s important to focus on one virtue at a time. With personal mastery and personal growth, trying to work on too many aspects at once will probably end up resulting in less growth.

[38:45] - A lot of our habits are rooted in self-talk, and our self-talk is our shame manifesting itself. Our shame and our self-talk help create our core beliefs. Focus on the way that you speak to yourself and how you compare yourself to other. Start there and allow it to bleed out into any of the other things you want to work on.

[42:00] - Getting into a relationship with someone is a great way to figure out your triggers. Andrea shares an example of a time she and her husband got into an argument, and she found that it was easier to go to a place where she was planning a single life, rather than facing what she needed to own from the argument and discovering what the triggers were.

[44:25] - Sometimes when we’re triggered and feeling uncomfortable, the first thing we do is look for the places where we can find control. We can notice and observe certain behaviors to use as red flags for when we’re feeling a certain way. The trick becomes using those indicators to hack your way back into what’s actually going on. Charlie talks about the HALTS (hungry, angry, lonely, tired, and sick/stressed) behaviors as common indicators. When we do lash out, it’s important to own it.

[50:30] - Sometimes when writing books, authors will write portions for themselves. For Andrea, some of the habits she can most relate with are control, overachieving, and being strong. She briefly describes her struggle with these habits.

[54:20] - Andrea’s invitation/challenge is to really admit when you have screwed up - in a friendship, at work, or a romantic relationship. Instead of placing blame or making excuses to defend yourself, pause and take ownership and apologize to get a conversation started. Those are some huge and hard lessons, but they will help build trust and connections that can foster a new level of intimacy in any type of relationship.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Andrea Owen

Brene Brown

52 Ways to Live a Kick Ass Life, by Andrea Owen

How to Stop Feeling Like Shit, by Andrea Owen

Fierce Conversations, by Susan Scott

The New One Minute Manager, by Ken Blanchard

TouchPoints, by Douglas Conant & Mette Norgaard

Your Brain at Work, by David Rock

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Today’s guest, Kerra Bolton, is a journalist turned political communication strategist turned consultant who helps people and businesses get involved in their communities through business activism. Kerra joins Charlie on the show today to discuss what business activism is, and how it’s easier and safer than people think it is. You don’t have to pick the biggest and most controversial topics and alienate your customers to make a difference in your community. Making a difference in your community makes a huge difference to your customers.

Key Takeaways:

[2:30] - What is business activism? To Kerra, it means using your business to take a stand on social issues and/or to help in your community in some way that makes you a community leader through your business. Also using the resources of your business to meet the challenges and opportunities of your community.

[3:35] - Perhaps today more than before, there is a call for more businesses and brands to get involved at a social and political level. Historically, business activism reflects culture. There was not the same call for businesses to take a stand, but many individuals channeled their money into philanthropy.

[6:03] - For Kerra, there is a distinction between volunteering (and philanthropy) and activism. Volunteering is taking actions or a series of actions to alleviate suffering in some way. Activism is a set of actions towards changing political or public policy, or making social change via the political system. Business activism is when you as a business owner are using the resources and tools of your business to solve a particular problem in the community that you serve.

[8:00] - Charlie shares the Patagonia example of business activism, and the stance they’ve taken in regards to the land of the national parks. This issue is something that is relevant to their business, and part of their business heritage.

[11:35] - In addition to heritage, there are some other factors for businesses to consider when taking a stance. One is authenticity - businesses should treat activism as a movement, rather than as a moment. Another thing is team support; team support can help you flesh out ideas and provides different avenues for your activism to play out. The last thing to consider is the relationship your brand has with your audience. It can serve as a portal to deeper your audience’s engagement and inspire them.

[14:30] - Business activism doesn’t have to be that extreme or big. There is a range of how much you can get involved, and you can still make a difference. Kerra’s advice is to start local, and look at the needs in your community and the communities that your business serves. This allows you to get involved without necessarily having to jump into the political fray. There are some safe groups you could serve: kids, pets, the elderly, and veterans.

[18:11] - Some people may feel that if they get involved in business activism that they will lose customers, and it would be safer to not get involved. There are some benefits though. Getting involved at some level allows you to be part of the change, and also businesses can carry more sway than individuals being involved.

[20:50] - Kerra has a background in media and politics. She has an understanding of how government works from the local level all the way up to Congress. After journalism, she joined the North Carolina Democratic Party has a state spokesperson. Kerra has also worked as a lobbyist and helping non-profits share their stories; she’s been very involved in public policy because that what she’s seen be successful in getting things done.

[22:40] - Building relationships with your politicians can help with public policy. It’s not really that hard to establish relationships with them. They like knowing what people are saying locally because they don’t receive that information. From a business perspective, prioritizing your employees ability to make appointments to meet with legislators is an indirect way where your business doesn’t have to take a stance, but still supports political involvement.

[28:30] - Kerra talks about her experience working with legislators and how her tenacity and persistence helped her develop good relationships with them.

[29:35] - Another facet of business activism is community and customer solidarity. As a consumer, having a business or brand stand up for what you believe in gives a sense of community. As a business, you provide solidarity and promote customer loyalty as well as a form of change together.

[31:25] - There are some ways not to get involved, and Kerra shares the examples of Pepsi and Papa John’s. It is not as effective for your business to jump in on the news of the day. You want to think long-term and issue-oriented.

[35:57] - Social listening is a great opportunity to figure out what your customers are thinking about certain topics. Listening to not only their pain points but also the things that they hope for can help guide your activism.

[37:20] - A final thing to consider is supporting a political entity versus a policy. Your donations to political parties can be traced, and a donation can tie you to a party or person. Issue-based advocacy is really the best way to go.

[39:38] - Kerra’s invitation for listeners is to get off your phones and social media, and get into your community. Look around and notice who’s not being heard, think about what you love, and do some social listening to see what’s going on. Roll up your sleeves and find a way to get involved.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Kerra’s Website

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As the year comes to a close, we have a natural inclination to look back on what’s happened over the past year. Many of the Productive Flourishing readers and listeners have been asking questions about ways to do annual reviews or think about assessing the year. In today’s episode, Angela and Charlie talk through their new annual review worksheet, and share several tips on reviewing your year, as well as self-care during the holidays.

Key Takeaways:

[4:55] - A lot of time during the holidays, people have tension between being productive, spending time with family, and being in the season. Being with family and reflecting is a way of being productive, and it’s important to make time for those things.

[7:10] - When you start thinking about the year in review, always start with the celebration of the things that you’ve done. Think about the top three things from the year that you want to remember. Charlie encourages people to separate their personal and professional lives into separate buckets to give both the credit they deserve.

[10:47] - One of Angela’s biggest celebrations from this year in her professional was developing her new coaching practice, Clarity Coaching. This has gotten her back into the work that she loves the most, helping someone realize what they’re able to do. Her biggest personal celebration is the way she’s invited boundaries into her life in her relationships with people.

[14:45] - Charlie’s biggest celebration in his professional life is his book deal! He’s under contract to write a book tentatively titled Start Finishing: How to Go From Idea to Done. They’ve also experienced a lot of growth with Productive Flourishing. In his personal life, his biggest celebration also had to do with boundaries, and taking a step back from some things to avoid burnout. This allowed him to get clear about the expectations and intentions for himself, and he was able to reclaim a lot of time.

[19:10] - Do this reflection not only for yourself, but think about whether there is someone else in your life that can do this reflection as well so you all can celebrate each other. If you’re doing this with a team, make sure you explain why those things are important to you, because that’s where the real strengthening will happen.

[22:20] - The next question on the worksheet is what three things challenged you the most over the past year. People often see a tight relationship between the things that challenged you professionally and the things that challenged you personally.

[24:54] - The next question evaluates the top three lessons learned or reaffirmed. This is really pushing you towards a growth mindset. The goal is to not have to keep learning the same lesson over and over again. Later on in life, you may be learning the same thing, but it’s usually at a higher level.

[27:03] - Charlie talks about the four steps of the Wayfinding Academy. The first step is knowing where you are, the second step is knowing where you’re trying go, the third step is having a road map between where you are and where you’re trying to get, and the fourth step is knowing how to get back on track when you get off-course.

[28:30] - When thinking about the top three goals for the coming year, there are two different types. One is quantitative goals, and the other is more milestone or baseline goals. As you are thinking about goals, it’s important to get to a place where you can be sure you did it or you did not do it. This is also true for personal goals, so try to avoid vague goals that won’t motivate you.

[31:35] - The next question to think about is what needs to change to be able to achieve those goals. Sometimes nothing needs to change, but for most people, something has to change. You may have to change your day-to-day focus to achieve your overall goal, or you may have to drop some things to make the time for a new focus.

[37:10] - The next question asks what sprints, strategic projects, or experiments you could run to help you achieve those goals. Charlie goes over what each of these look like, and how you can utilize them to starting working on your goals. Sprints keep you in the project long enough that you’re still interested, but doesn’t drag it on.

[42:08] - Moving through the worksheet, the next question encourages you to identify someone who will support you through the sprints, projects, and experiments. Whenever you have a “how” problem, find a “who” solution - there’s probably someone who has been in your shoes or can help get you moving forward. It also helps build your success team.

[44:15] - The last major question on the worksheet is ‘When will you reach out to the people who can support you?’ Giving people advance notice of when you will need their help will increase their willingness and ability to provide support, and it also gives you enough time to pay it forward for that particular person. Ask them what you can do to support them in the meantime.

[48:00] - In real time, these questions take about 15 or 30 minutes to sit down and work through. Charlie shares some final reminders for working through the sheet. 1. Remember to start from a place of celebration before getting into the challenges. 2. Continue to think about what affects your personal life and professional life discreetly, while keeping in mind that they often overlap. Treat your life like your work - carry over what works in your job into your personal life. 3. Be thinking about what needs to change, and focus on the internal changes more than external changes. 4. Think about who you are going to reach out to, and reach out to them early.

[51:10] - Self-care is tied into all of these, especially looking at your goals, victories, and challenges. For this specific time of year, be sure to take some time to slow down and allow yourself the opportunity to reflect.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Productive Flourishing Podcast Episode 121: How to be Intentional During the Holidays

Productive Flourishing Podcast Episode 108: How to Align Your Goals and Projects with Your Seasonal Energy

How to Set SMART Goals on Productive Flourishing

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Lee Rankin, owner of Apple Hill Farm, an award-winning agri-tourism business in North Carolina. Lee joins Charlie on the show today to talk about the challenges and triumphs of starting a farm from scratch, and growing it while being a single mom in the middle of North Carolina. While the story is primarily about the farm, she encounters many of the same patterns and principles that we see in all types of creative work and businesses.

Key Takeaways:

[2:35] - When Lee was 40, she took her one and a half year old son to the Kentucky State Fair and she met an alpaca. In that moment, she realized that what she wanted to do was raise alpacas. When she had fulfilled her current commitment in Kentucky, she moved herself and her son to North Carolina and they found a property, and that’s how it all started.

[6:00] - Alpacas date back to Incan times, and Lee thinks they have that same energy pattern intact, and that’s why people are drawn to them. This connection doesn’t seem to happen with just any animal.

[8:30] - Along this journey, Lee not only learned about farming, but also learned a lot about herself. First and foremost, she learned that she doesn’t have to know how to do something to actually do it. It’s more about her wanting to do it, moving forward, and learning how to correct when she needs to go in a different direction.

[9:54] - Looking back on it, Lee learned that she is much braver and more courageous than she had any idea. Charlie talks about “moral luck,”and the idea that there are times and spaces where we are in certain situations that allow us to manifest bravery and courage. We can’t always know or predict what we’ll do in a given situation.

[11:38] - There were a lot of challenges in getting things started, and sometimes looking back on it, she can’t believe she made it through (while raising a child!). One of the first things that happened, about six months into raising alpacas, was that there was an attack on them and she lost four out of five of the alpacas. She discovered her bravery in her quick action and reaction in getting help. Because one lived, they were able to move forward.

[16:50] - The alpacas they lost were insured, and although it wasn’t easy, they were able to use the insurance to purchase new alpacas. Had they not been insured, it would’ve been a great loss of money in addition to the loss of the animals. Lee explains a bit about the alpaca business model; their intention was to breed and show.

[18:40] - They stayed in the selling animals business for a while, but they also gained some interest in people coming to visit their farm. Lee talks about some of the precautions they put in place to protect the alpacas (more animals), and how that became a story.

[20:48] - There are many parallels between creative businesses and the farm business. What usually happens in businesses of all types, is that thing you originally start your business around is not always what makes it profitable. For Lee’s business, people were originally coming for the story around the tragedy, but now they keep coming back to the farm because they have a group of animals that work together and allow them to experience something they’re not used to seeing.

[23:27] - The shift to agri-tourism started slowly, and they had to make some changes to become an agri-tourism farm. Lee had to have the animals handled in a way that allows her to spend time with the guests, and they also opened a store.

[24:12] - Agri-tourism is tourism on a farm that has to do with agriculture or the land. People are interested in seeing and teaching these processes. They also attract families because families are interested in doing things they can do all together. Fundamentally, they are selling an experience.

[27:20] - Alpaca fur is very popular because it’s hypoallergenic, and it’s hollow-cored so it’s warm without being hot. It’s also a natural fiber. There’s an element to it that is more than the sum of its parts that makes it very appealing to people.

[30:05] - They have an incredible team of people who work at Apple Hill Farm. They have some employees who have been with them for several years, and they currently have a graduate student on the farm who is studying bumble bee DNA. They have some others who are in school, as well as several people who do things outside of their work on the farm. The team has a special bond, which enhances how they work together and interact with their guests on the farm.

[33:55] - Lee has fostered a culture at the farm that is defined by kindness and respect, not just between the staff, but also extended to the guests. A strong leader on their team, Breann, also supports Lee in this idea.

[36:23] - Lee really loves what she does and is passionate about it, which has made it hard to turn some things over. But she’s found that when she does turn something over, they grow. With Eric and Breann on board, they have separated tasks out so they’re each responsible for something, instead of Lee shouldering it all. This has led to them gaining some outside support as well, especially with the people who do their payroll, who celebrate their wins with them.

[42:05] - There’s a difference between the responsibility load that you carry and the time it takes to do those things. When you can let that go, not only does it free up time, but it lifts the responsibility weight and allows you to focus on other things.

[47:20] - Lee’s biggest challenge right now is still trying to find the time to step away and work on her memoir. She wants to step away at the same time the business is growing exponentially, but also doesn’t want to leave.

[49:55] - They’re up 32% in number of tours compared to last year, and in terms of money brought in by the tours, they’re up 46%. Their year-to-date sales figures are up about 35%. Leaving this type of growth is difficult because it’s what Lee has been working for since it opened.

[53:47] - To help manage the different tasks she does, Lee has days designated for certain tasks - accounting days, days set aside for writing, days on the farm, and rest days. She also manages her time throughout each day, and sets time aside for her to do something creative each day. The principles Lee practices work in a wide variety of contexts and businesses.

[59:07] - Lee’s challenge for listeners is to look at what you’re doing from the standpoint of what is it that you’re giving that you need to receive, and start receiving it.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Apple Hill Farm

How to Be a Productive Powerhouse Using Time Blocking, by Charlie Gilkey for Productive Flourishing

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Mike Vardy, a show regular, joins Charlie to jam about using energy as the basis of your plans and reflections, rather than just time. They also talk about using feelings as a gauge for productivity, rather than mere output. A key goal of their work is to feel better physically and emotionally, and it’s important to address those aspects just as much, and maybe more, than what we’re getting done. Mike is the founder of Productivityist and has been a frequent guest on the podcast.

Key Takeaways:

[2:10] - So much of productivity is focused on time, when maybe focusing on energy-based productivity may give you more traction.

[4:30] - We’re all productive during different times of the day, and our ideal day is going look different because we have different circadian rhythms. Our most productive times come around certain certainties we have based on the time of day. For Mike, it’s at night when he knows his kids are going to be in bed. That’s when he can get a lot of work done.

[7:10] - It is important to set boundaries for your work and energy - this might be certain times of the day where you can fall into deep work without worrying about having to respond to others. These can happen naturally based on the times of day you are generally most productive.

[12:50] - Figure out when you’re at your best, and structure your to-do list around that, rather than just letting it happen to you. As you begin working through your to-do list, you have to focus on what you can accomplish in your peak energy levels.

[18:25] - Finding something to act as a trigger to keep you on track is important for making the best use of your energy. Mike gives some examples, like his kids watching Netflix or closing the rings on his Apple Watch. You can use these triggers to redirect you back to your priority tasks.

[24:35] - The idea of triggers sounds more complicated than it is - it’s essentially just asking “Why am I here?” If you find yourself getting in your own way, or notice you’re doing something different than the task at hand, you can ask yourself why, and get yourself back to the original task.

[26:30] - Mike and Charlie talk about intention versus attention - knowing what your intention is allows you to pay attention to whether you’re using your time and energy in the best way.

[28:16] - People often conflate clarity and certainty - you can have clarity about what you need to work on, but have no certainty about when it comes up on a given day. We have more control than we’d like to believe, but you have to pay attention - it is about putting a framework in place that supports you.

[35:43] - Sometimes, people are so focused on a linear model of time, when a circular model allows us to make the most of our time. There is flexibility in when you start your day, your week, or in Mike’s case, even the year. Having a plan and sticking to your plan can help make time work for you.

[39:11] - A lot of people want to get “all the things” done. When you begin to evaluate how you’re spending your time in relation to your energy levels, it may feel like you’re getting less done. The focus becomes getting the important things done well, rather than ticking off boxes on a list. Too many people are trying to get as many things done as possible, because they equate productivity with how many things they did.

[42:24] - Time is a valuable resource that we should spend wisely, but that doesn’t mean that it’s not okay to delay tasks to a later time, especially if you’re not equipped to get something done at that time. The important thing about putting off a task to a different time is to be intentional about when you’re going to pick it back up, or decide it’s not useful anymore.

[47:00] - The more you do, the more people are going to want your time. Having your “bucket” of things you know you want to get accomplished some time down the road can help you protect your time when people start reaching out. Having things planned ahead allows you to prioritize and hold yourself accountable. It gives you the ammunition to say no, but also gives you the clarity to say yes.

[51:05] - Mike encourages journaling, or some way to keep track of not just the quantitative aspects, but also the qualitative aspects of your energy and how you’re spending your time. Record how you feel physically and emotionally. This can also help you in the future to decide if it’s worth it for you to take on certain tasks.

[54:16] - Mike invites and challenges listeners to start organizing your to-do lists by energy levels. Instead of working by project all the time, work by your energy levels to accomplish your tasks.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Mike Vardy

Productivityist

The Front Nine, by Mike Vardy

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Courtney Carver returns to the show today to talk about some of the ideas in her new book, Soul Simplicity: How Living with Less Can Lead to So Much More. Many people think of minimalism and un-stuffing as merely a way to get rid of stuff, but there is actually a very important tie between how much excess stuff we own and pursue, and how much room we’re making for the things that matter. Charlie and Courtney explore these relationships, and provide a handy way to get back to the heart of what matters.

Key Takeaways:

[3:00] - Courtney received her wake-up call when she was diagnosed with MS, and that was the start of her changing her entire life. A little over a year after her diagnosis and she began making her initial changes, she realized the common thread of all those changes was simplicity.

[5:07] - It seems that most life changes are based on some sort of wake-up call or pattern interrupt. Some of the ones Courtney often hears about are health scares, losing a family member, or the beginning or end of a relationship. They are usually pretty major wake-up calls, and sometimes it takes something big because we don’t always pay attention to or act on the little things.

[6:55] - Minimalism is so often focused on stuff, but it’s broader than that. For Courtney, it was about figuring out how she was going to live well with MS. All her research came back to eliminating stress. She started with her diet, and then focused on debt. Shopping gave her an outlet blow off steam, but it was leading to more debt and more clutter, both of which led to more stress. Letting go of her stuff relieved more stress than she imagined, because she was getting rid of things that didn’t add value to her life.

[9:40] - The shopping high (or whichever outlet you choose) can placate us into thinking we’ve done something about whatever problem we’re trying to escape, but the problem is still going to be there. Courtney talks about the myth of ownership, and how we feel like we need to buy a certain thing so we’ll be a certain type of person. We also shop to relieve boredom.

[13:15] - In times when Charlie has ended up in “accidental consumerism,” he takes time to evaluate why he’s making the purchase and make sure he’s not acting on a stress stimulus. This extends to any of the vices we turn to when we’re bored or frustrated or stressed. How can we be curious about why we’re bored and what might make us less bored?

[15:40] - It is okay to be stressed or frustrated or bored. It’s definitely okay to feel our feelings, but one reason that change doesn’t stick is because we’re not willing to feel uncomfortable. Charlie finds that as people, we are selectively uncomfortable about certain types of discomfort. There are some situations where we’re okay being uncomfortable, and other situations that we can’t be in. It is important to identify what types of things make you uncomfortable, and not use discomfort as excuse to miss out on an opportunity for growth.

[19:17] - Sometimes it’s hard to get ourselves to do the things that are going to make us better, like working out or meditating. Once we do them, we usually don’t feel worse after. Courtney’s rule is just to show up - get to the gym or the place where you meditate - just make the effort to show up and go from there.

[24:40] - Courtney has a practice/exercise to help people figure out where to start or what to let go of. She closes her eyes and literally puts her hands over her heart, as if she’s holding it. From there, she either listens or she asks questions - as she listens for the response, sometimes she writes them down or engages further. The message she gives herself is that she trusts herself and has confidence in her decisions. This exercise gives you permission not to be in your head.

[28:50] - Many people get stuck when they look ahead from where they are now to a future state that’s dramatically different from where they are. Focusing on small steps that will push you closer to the future state can help with progress. Small, tiny changes make for huge, huge changes.

[31:42] - Busyness is just as pervasive as clutter in terms of stress and discontent. Often times we try to prove who we are by what we do, sometimes in a way that has negative consequences. This business can affect relationships or leave us feeling overcommitted and overwhelmed. It is important to be intentional about how we’re spending our time.

[36:55] - We often get caught in the busyness trap because we conflate hard work and value - we think if we work harder we’re a more valuable person, and a lot of times this isn’t true. You may reach a point where you realize that working harder isn’t going to solve the problems, but is contributing or creating more.

[38:01] - As Charlie mentioned, it’s smart to schedule our non-work events with the same intention as our work times. If you’ve set aside time to spend with family, it’s important to focus on the family, rather than than doing work stuff. This allows you to figure out what it means for you to be fully engaged.

[44:47] Courtney’s invitation to you is to try the practice of putting your hands on your heart. Take five minutes and sit down and put your hands on your heart; take some deep breaths, and see how that feels.

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Productive Flourishing

Courtney Carver

Soulful Simplicity, by Courtney Carver

Productive Flourishing Podcast Episode 92: Be More with Less with Courtney Carver

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Today’s guest, Penelope Trunk, was diagnosed with Asperger’s when she was 37 years old. She joins Charlie on the show today to discuss how and why women with autism are massively under-diagnosed. They also discuss how schools aren’t built to foster creativity. Penelope is the founder of four start-ups, and has been named one of the Top 10 Most Influential Women in Tech and the World’s Most Influential Career Coach.

Key Takeaways:

[2:52] - Women with Asperger’s are massively under-diagnosed. Part of it is because parents naturally assume that their kids are fine, but the other part of it is that there is a stereotype of what it is to have Asperger’s, and women don’t generally fit the stereotype. She goes on to explain some of the characteristics of this condition, how they can be overlooked, and some of the damaging effects of not diagnosing it.

[5:07] - The suicide rate for girls with Asperger’s is very high, and the signposts for Asperger’s in girls can be dangerous. Having an eating disorder is a signpost in girls, whereas being grades ahead in math is a signpost for boys. Many girls don’t get diagnosed until their 20’s or 30’s.

[6:42] - Both autism and Asperger’s have to do with how people read social cues, but people with Asperger’s are more high-functioning. People with Asperger’s have a high IQ, and this allows them to “skate by” in social and educational settings.

[7:32] - Penelope didn’t know she has Asperger’s until her son was diagnosed with autism when he was two years old. Autism is genetic, so if your child has autism, one of the parents do too. Looking back, Penelope had already been through everything that was common for women with Asperger’s, but people were not used to putting it all together.

[11:01] - Penelope talks about her success as a bit of an anomaly. Since she thinks and functions like a guy, she was not distracted by things most women tend to get distracted by.

[15:07] - Charlie and Penelope talk about some of the opposing viewpoints that are sending mixed messages to girls as they are growing up about what they can do and what they can be, especially when having children comes into the picture.

[18:51] - When looking at statistics, Penelope says we can only look at women who have a real choice. The statistics find that generally when women have a choice, they choose to stay home and raise their kids rather than go to work.

[21:35] - Penelope and Charlie share their viewpoints on the success of creative people in school. Creative people may not always approach right and wrong answers the same way, but that doesn’t mean they can’t understand the benefits of doing well in school in terms of right and wrong answers. They also discuss economic mobility as a byproduct of education.

[24:50] - The economic mobility that the education system could be giving is getting lower. One of the discrepancies in the system is that minorities tend to have to stifle their creativity whereas rich students benefit from ignoring school and continuing to be creative.

[29:45] - School doesn’t teach and foster creativity; it’s structured for compliance, not creativity. While the origins of our education system are controversial, they do help to explain some of the systems that are currently in place. The purpose of education is different in rural areas versus urban areas.

[35:50] - Most of the motivation for education for our children is generational. Most parents teach what worked for them, so they send them to school so they can get an education that will allow them to get a degree and get a job.

[43:02] - The traditional education system does not do a good job of cultivating creativity as much as it does compliance, predictability and regularity. There are different ways people think about creativity, and while there are alternative paths for creatives, they aren’t quite as well known yet.

[45:18] - Charlie and Penelope discuss the interesting phenomenon of creative parents who send their kids to school because they think they can’t get their creative work done if their kids are home.

[52:13] - The conversation circles back around to Asperger’s - one way to tell if someone has Asperger’s is that they can’t let topics go. Penelope is very passionate about her beliefs, and Charlie and Penelope discuss how because of Asperger’s, she may be less sensitive to some of the alternative viewpoints of others.

[56:45] - Penelope expresses some of her frustrations with dealing with Asperger’s, but coming from a place of understanding from both parties can help foster productive and enlightening conversation. It’s important to be empathetic to different social pressures and the way someone else understands the world.

[59:41] - Penelope’s invitation/challenge is that listeners go read her blog and then talk to her!

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Penelope Trunk

Penelope Trunk: Blog

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Both Charlie and Angela work as coaches. In this episode, Angela and Charlie talk about how to know when it’s time to work with a coach or a consultant. The conversation gets to the heart of some of the ways that we don’t allow ourselves to get the help and support that we might be needing.

Key Takeaways:

[2:28] - What Charlie and Angela often find in their work is that people will put the support they need further down the pipe. One of the common things people say is that they’ll get the help or support they need after they finish a list of certain things. Many times, this list of things is something a coach could help you do faster or more effectively.

[5:23] - Angela notices that clients often express their excitement to work with her, but they say they have too much going on at the time. Again, these things are usually the exact things a coach or consultant could help with.

[7:07] - It almost feels like people wait to work with a coach because they feel like they need to diagnose themselves, and heal themselves or make themselves well before they go to the doctor. Too often, Angela and Charlie cross paths with people who haven’t given themselves the permission to invest in themselves to get the support that they need.

[8:46] - The busier you are, the more important it is that you have to make better decisions. When you’re busy, you’re more likely to continue to make easy decisions that don’t solve the problem, or participate in patterns that keep things going that aren’t actually conducive to making a change. Sometimes, the best time to talk with someone is during the hard parts of life - it may not be the best decision to wait for things to slow down.

[11:03] - For Charlie, it’s about energy and attention. If your energies and attentions are focused on taking care of someone else or a rough situation, it may not be the best time to work with a consultant. In general though, if there’s a lot going on, chances are there will continue to be a lot going on. So that may not be the best indicator of whether you could benefit from a coach or not.

[14:55] - One thing to consider is that is it more likely that you and whoever you work with will be able to co-create something to help you get out of a busy cycle, or can you figure it out faster on your own? Usually, working with a coach or consultant will allow you to figure it out faster. What would it be worth to you to have the trouble issue solved?

[18:12] - Some people think they already know what they need to do to get moving in the right direction. Charlie’s question to them would be how long have you known that? If you know what you need to do, and you’re not doing it, ask yourself why. Additionally, just because you think you know what needs to be done, doesn’t mean you’re right. Having someone hold you accountable for those things can be helpful.

[22:11] - It can be useful to commit to people that you’re going to do something. A good coach will ask you about these commitments, rather than just letting them go. It can be a delicate situation because you don’t want to end up in a situation where you’re frustrated to meet with your coach or consultant because they’re going to grill you about those commitments.

[24:03] - Sometimes a coach will challenge you to do more than you would on your own. It’s important to make sure this is something that resonates with you. Make sure that the goals are your own, and the coach is helping you do what you already want or know you need to do.

[26:26] - Angela leaves us with these thoughts: Whatever the facet of life, if there is a goal and future you see for yourself that is important to you, invest in yourself. Spend the time on yourself like you would for other people.

[27:45] - Charlie leaves us with these thoughts: How is what you’re doing working for you? If you keep doing what you’re doing, you’re going to keep getting what you’re getting. At what real point in the world will you make a different decision and go about something in a new way?

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

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Today’s jam is all about stepping out of your comfort zone: why it’s challenging, how we avoid it, and how people do it successfully. Our guest, Andy Molinsky, will also share some of the surprising revelations of his research findings. Andy is the author of the books Reach and Global Dexterity, and is a professor at Brandeis University International Business School.

Key Takeaways:

[2:30] - Andy became interested in the topic of getting out of your comfort zone after he wrote Global Dexterity, and realized people were applying the information about acting outside of their cultural comfort zone to stepping outside of their comfort zone, period. He had been doing academic research on the topic previously as well, and it’s been something he’s struggled with personally.

[4:12] - Charlie and Andy discuss Andy’s educational background, and how he went from organizational behavior to focusing more on personal behavior. Andy also talks about his academic writing versus his writing for popular audiences, and how that was a discovery about his own comfort zone.

[12:30] - Some of the psychological challenges to stepping outside of your comfort zone are: authenticity, likeability, competence, resentment, and morality. There’s a wide range of context and situations where people encounter these pain points. Andy talks briefly about what each looks like.

[17:00] - Moral pluralism is when different moral claims and responsibilities happen in a situation at the same time. Charlie talks about how this can come into play with each psychological challenge.

[21:45] - Resentment can present itself in many different ways. Andy talks about being an employee feeling resentful that they have to step out of their comfort zone to do something that they feel they shouldn’t have to do in the first place. This can also happen with entry-level workers; often times there is an awareness that the course they’re on is necessary, but they can still be resentful that they aren’t able to do some other project or task.

[25:03] - We’re very good at avoiding things, either consciously or unconsciously. There’s a bit of relief when we avoid doing something, but at the same time, putting it off until a later time is just going to make it harder to do.

[28:06] - Some other avoidance strategies are rationalization, and substituting. Usually when substituting, it would result in an imperfect substitution where you opt for a different method rather than what would really be best for you to do.

[32:38] - One important thing to remember is that each person handles challenges better at different points of the day. First things first doesn’t necessarily mean sequence; it can mean your first and most primal energy would be where you focus on the important tasks you need to complete. It’s not necessarily avoidance if you save it for a time you know you will be productive.

[35:07] - In his research, Andy found three key things that help people get out of their comfort zones: conviction, customization, and clarity. The trio of all three seemed to increase the odds of people willing to take a leap. Conviction is finding your purpose, and understanding your why.

[37:00] - Customization is the simple idea that there is no one-size-fits-all for anything. In any situation outside your comfort zone, you can tweak or customize to make the situation more comfortable for you.

[41:50] - We have more power than we think, and when we adopt this thought pattern, we can leverage our creativity and experimentation to make situations more comfortable for us when we’re stepping outside our comfort zones. Creating small wins for ourselves helps put us in the position to succeed, and when we do mess up, it’s good to see those instances as learning opportunities.

[46:08] - It is really critical to take a leap. Once you do take a leap, it’s important because you can learn something about yourself. You may discover that something isn’t as hard as you thought it was, or that you’re better at it than you thought you might be. When you have this experience, you may end up increasing the odds that you will try again, and build confidence and mastery.

[48:48] - Andy’s challenge for listeners: Take a piece of paper and draw three circles. One circle is your comfort zone, one is your stretch zone, and the other is your terror zone. Think of 3 to 5 tasks or situations in your life that can go in each of the circles. Focus on your stretch zone and see which task or situation could be something you would really like to dedicate some effort to working on.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Andy Molinsky

Books by Andy Molinsky

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In today’s episode, Leah and Charlie discuss an array of topics, like how mindfulness may be unintentionally excluding people from different religious faiths, and how people in organizations can make room for an inclusive conversation about introspective practices that respect everyone’s beliefs. They also discuss the traps of creating “universal” solutions that stamp out individuality in other cultures. Leah is a business consultant and author who helps people integrate mindfulness and productivity.

Key Takeaways:

[1:48] - We often use mindfulness as an agnostic and inclusive way to pull people into a practice of meditation or thoughtfulness, but sometimes mindfulness can be exclusive.

[2:48] - Right now, Leah is working on an academic case that looks at how different companies are bringing in mindfulness - their metrics, how it’s being received - as well as the consequences and challenges. In corporate settings, there hasn’t been as much dialogue about this topic as there has been in the field of education.

[4:25] – In her work, Leah heard the comment that businesses are becoming the new church, or a place where conversations about values are happening. On the one hand, this is exciting, but there are better ways to approach these conversations and ways that could come across as exclusive or offensive. This type of conversation isn’t quite as prevalent in the corporate world.

[6:06] – It is important to think about the context of the major dominant culture and its values versus alternative values. Sometimes, the ways we talk about mindfulness can be exclusive of certain groups (most commonly Christians here in the US). It is important to make room for other ways of thinking, and consider different words for the same thing.

[9:15] – How can we approach this conversation at the organizational level? Leah highlights the importance of being up front about the goals of the conversation, and inviting varying viewpoints without judgment. There should be a respect for our ability to learn from one another.

[12:10] – Historically, Christianity, Islam, and Judaism have been the most exclusive religions. When discussing your beliefs, it is important to do it in a respectful way that informs others of where you’re coming from, while valuing where they’re coming from as well. This invites a mutual understanding of each other’s languages as well – you don’t have to use the same terminology across the board, but you have to understand what’s being said. It’s not conversion practice; it is creating a space to have a quiet and introspective time.

[17:15] – What often happens is that people dodge conversations when they have the opportunity to get to know someone on a deeper level. Having a shared goal can help make these conversations easier. These sorts of conversations aren’t a part of education anymore, and it makes it hard to have those conversations later on in our professional lives. It can be daunting to ask questions while worrying about being insulting. Not having these conversations can unintentionally lead to people getting offended anyway.

[21:00] – Having conversations with others to learn about their beliefs and practices can raise awareness of their culture so you know how to coexist (personally and professionally) in a way that respects everyone’s beliefs. When you have these conversations, it’s important not to come from a place of judgement, but as a way to understand how another person interacts with the world.

[25:03] – One of the things Leah has been doing at work is working with some of the biggest oil companies to explore how to implement mindfulness in the context of improving safety. With increased intention to our attention, there will be an impact on safety and good outcomes, but you have to speak a language that everyone can relate to. You have to spend time with people and learn their language and see what is going to work for the people you’re trying to reach.

[27:15] – Trying to create a universal “plug and play” system may end up overriding cultural and personal differences. A great way to make sure that you’re being culturally relevant is to make sure you’re hiring people from that culture to run programs and work in the management system. Charlie talks about the dichotomy between local people doing the work and the management being of an outside culture.

[30:30] – The only way to surface our strongest assumptions is to get out of the places where the assumptions universally apply. When trying to create a productive culture in a workplace, corporations have to make sure they are thinking about the conditions that will enable everyone in the workplace to thrive.

[33:45] – Knowing the culture of an organization beforehand is important in making sure it will be a good fit. Organizations should be asking what they’re optimizing their culture for, and individuals should be thinking about what they’re optimizing their career around. If you have the option, pick a place where the culture will also enhance your career goals.

[36:10] – Undergrads, or anyone, trying to decide what to do for your career, get somewhere near it so you can learn about the culture of that career and how you fit into it. Before you rule something out, if you have the opportunity, try it out. Experiential learning is the best learning.

[41:50] – Leah’s challenge is to go to someone in your life (school, workplace), who comes from a background different than your own. Ask them questions about it, and make the choice to tell them you want to learn more – don’t let fear of the conversation or saying the wrong things stop you.

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Productive Flourishing

Leah Weiss

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Sometimes, we’re in a business or a career, and it’s not suiting us for one reason or another, but we’re not sure in which new direction to move. In this episode, Charlie and Breanne explore what to do when you need to make a shift, but you’re not sure what to shift into. They focus on their work with growing other businesses, as well as the growing pangs they are each going through in their own lives. Breanne is the founder of MNIB Consulting, a business strategist, and has been a regular guest on the Productive Flourishing podcast.

Key Takeaways:

[2:45] - In our work, something may be missing and we know there’s some shift that needs to happen, but we’re not sure what. From the outside, it may look like we have it all, when in reality there are things that aren’t quite right, and things that could be better.

[5:40] - There are a lot of purpose-centric questions being asked these days, and across people in different industries, there has been a lot of indecision and uncertainty. When something is up in the air, it’s a good time to sit back and evaluate if that’s really what you want to be doing with your life.

[8:15] - One of the focuses of Breanne’s meditations for martial arts is that all we have is the present; what is the past has already happened, and what’s going to happen in the future, we can’t control, but we can decide what we’re going to do in this moment. At the same time, in our day-to-day lives, we have to recognize that what we do in the present will impact the future.

[10:55] - Our world is a smaller part of something much larger, and as we move through our journey, there may be things ahead that we can’t see yet. When we come to these points on our journey where we may be moving into something new and we’re not sure that’s what we want to do, we can evaluate our highest and best use to help guide our decisions.

[15:05] - As Breanne has grown her business team, the larger staff has allowed her to free up some of the responsibilities she was previously handling. One thing she has noticed is that she’s been falling back into some old responsibilities in her job. Now, she is evaluating the best ways to use her free time.

[18:40] - Charlie has found that many of the projects he wants to be working on are long-term, and it’s been about finding small projects or business tasks that provide more immediate satisfaction of completion. Sometimes, our highest and best use might be doing a task we would really rather not be doing, but it is what is needed at the time.

[21:00] - As humans, we have needs for connection, and relation, and social, spiritual and physical needs. There is an interesting cultural phenomenon that it’s our business’s job to meet those needs. This has the potential to create a bit of a problem if your work and social circles overlap too much.

[24:20] - Back in the summer, Charlie started a new productivity experiment for himself. He set a limit of 8 hours a day of work, and writing and creative work counted. The second rule was to be done by 5:00pm. The last rule was no admin work in between the meetings. This experiment has allowed Charlie to evaluate how his work flow affects the amount of work the team has to take on, and make some positive changes that made the work manageable for everyone.

[27:25] - On Charlie’s team, they use the acronym “WBM,” which stands for “who besides me.” This helps identify the people who have the skills and the time to take on a project, and allows time to determine if it is a priority project. When this creates space in our day, we have to be intentional about how we’re spending and using that time.

[31:54] - Sometimes, with this new free time, it might be easy to fall back into patterns of work, but that could end up creating more work for our teams and ourselves. Sometimes the best thing to do is nothing. Learning to do nothing can enlighten the things we should be doing, and ask where we’re going next.

[38:30] - In our careers and our businesses, we don’t often have conversations about sufficiency. Sometimes things are really good, and stretching for immediate growth is not always necessary. Sometimes, where we are can be enough.

[42:25] - Highest and best use is about efficiency, and trusting that an efficient approach will accomplish what it needs to accomplish. Early on in a career, you may have to try many different approaches to figure out what is most efficient. As the business grows and matures, it’s about knowing which approaches to use and when.

[44:46] - Breanne’s challenge for listeners from the book she’s currently reading, The Power of Receiving: Get three pages of paper and fill the pages with “I want” statements. Explore what it is you actually want; don’t limit yourself!

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

MNIB Consulting, Inc.

The Power of Receiving, by Amanda Owen

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In today’s episode, Charlie and Angela discuss what it means to live away from family when they are dealing with health challenges and medical issues. Whether you are close or far from your relatives, you may have to be part of the healthcare journey of aging parents or grandparents. Charlie and Angela talk about different ways to determine your values, how to work with others in the family to come to decisions, and how to overcome the shame and guilt that may arise in these difficult situations.

Key Takeaways:

[3:30] - As we approach this conversation, it’s important to remember that every person’s relationship with their family is different, and their experience is going to be different. As you start making decisions about things related to family, you have to distinguish the fine line between your values, family values, and social pressures of “the way things should be.”

[4:55] - The context for Charlie and Angela’s family is that both their parents and Angela’s grandparents live in Arkansas, and now they live in Portland, Oregon, and it has created a barrier in time and distance.

[7:07] - For many creative people, it can be hard to find career opportunities where you’re from. Sometimes the place you’re from doesn’t resonate with you culturally, or allow you to be your most productive self. For Charlie and Angela, they’ve made the decision to stay in Portland for those reasons (and more), rather than packing up and moving closer to family.

[9:20] - Almost everyone is going to have to think about decisions related to family health at some point in time. Even if you’re in the same place as your parents or family, you may still be involved. But there is a whole new set of logistics that comes into play when you are not where your family is.

[11:25] - The thing Angela relies most on when determining whether an event is something she needs to be there for is her intuition - what felt right and what felt resonant in her heart. It wasn’t always the same as what her friends thought it would be or what society thought it would be.

[13:35] - Both Charlie and Angela have dealt with dementia in their family. For Charlie, it’s tricky because he wants to be there for everything, but on the other hand, he knows he can’t be there for everything. In addition to this, with dementia, his dad is not always present, even when he’s there, and too many people around can be too much in his dad’s situation.

[16:45] - Logical is not always what happens when it comes to our relationships with families. One of the best things we can do for ourselves and our families is to be able to have open and healthy conversations about what we’re able to do, what we want to do, and what we realistically can do in certain situations. Having this understanding is especially important in situations where maybe the family relationship isn’t the best, or there aren’t shared values.

[19:40] - It is important to try to get aligned on what outcome everyone wants. Everyone may have different ideas of how to get there, but it can help make the process easier to get everyone on the same page. You can set up different conditions and agree on them, and then get into the discussion of how best to achieve them.

[21:50] - Another important thing to remember is that everyone’s contribution may not look the same. Charlie talks about situations where maybe one person can’t be there, but could provide money or off-site planning to make things happen. Every contribution is important.

[23:28] - If you want a condition that’s different than the rest of your family, you have to be willing to be part of the solution to make it happen. If you’re in a situation where you can’t contribute time, energy, money, etc., you may not get as much say as someone who is able to be there and do the work.

[26:00] - If you are the sibling or child who is there, you may have to let go of being the martyr and ask for help or support. As the one who is with the family making the day-to-day decisions, asking for help and support can actually benefit the person you are caring for as well. Be careful not to close yourself off to people offering help as well. If you are a primary caregiver, it can be very valuable to have a therapist or a coach.

[33:15] - Guilt and shame are things many people wrestle with in these family situations. It is important to distinguish what is coming from yourself, versus what is coming from what other people think. Once you identify the source, figure out what it is that is not being manifested, and figure out what you can do to change the situation.

[37:37] - Identifying what is not in alignment for you (versus what other people think should be happening) is an important aspect of dealing with guilt and shame. Us developing as people is the constant awakening of ourselves - uncovering what our truths and values are.

[40:22] - As a caretaker, your life matters too. You make choices based on what will benefit everybody, including yourself. Put yourself in the mix of people and things that matter.

[42:15] - Whether you are the caretakee or the caretaker, Charlie is sending love. Do the best you can to take care of yourself and the people involved. At the end of the day, it’s really about the people.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

The Rise of the Creative Class, by Richard Florida

Who’s Your City, by Richard Florida

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In today’s episode, Jacquette Timmons and Charlie discuss how the ways we make and spend money are more based on our feelings and identities than on cold, hard logic. They also talk about how to pay attention to the data we’re getting as we make decisions about earning and spending. Jacquette Timmons is author of the book Financial Intimacy, and has also appeared as a guest on Oprah.com and CNN.

Key Takeaways:

[2:45] - Back in the summer, Jacquette had tried to launch a group coaching program with no success. After working through Charlie’s Epic Launch Playbook, she realized that thinking about the program didn’t bring her the same excitement and energy as working with her coaching clients.

[6:05] - The key piece to Jacquette making this discovery was the energy. Working on the group coaching program was draining her, and she realized that it was going to have an impact on how she was showing up to the project. She also realized that she could channel her efforts elsewhere to gain the same revenue she would’ve made from the group coaching project (by getting more one-on-one clients or doing more speaking gigs).

[7:30] - Your energy is important to how you might work towards earning something. It is important to evaluate how you feel about waking up to do the work. If it’s a negative feeling, maybe a different path is in store. You have to explore the small pocket of ways to make money that are also aligned with who you are, and what helps you thrive and makes you happy.

[11:10] - In her work and experience, Jacquette has noticed different trends when it comes to earning, between entrepreneurs and people who are employees for a larger entity. For entrepreneurs, it is often the case that their businesses are doing well, but their personal finances aren’t necessarily reflecting that. One way to approach finances in entrepreneurship is to figure out first what your business needs to be paying you to cover your expenses, set up savings, and support long-term wealth-building goals, rather than taking what’s leftover as what you pay yourself.

[14:25] - Another aspect to consider is your profit; your profit should be considered after it has paid you the salary it needs to pay you, rather than just what’s left over after operational expenses. Evaluating the finances of your business and your personal finances can be tough to do, but it is important to keep this in check in case you need to change something about your business plan.

[17:57] - If your business is not paying you, you essentially have a really expensive hobby, one that may actually also be eating away at your future. Income is largely the proxy you can use to determine what options you have for different circumstances in your life.

[21:05] - Our identity plays into the lens through which we analyze the situations we’re in, and how we navigate through them. We have to evaluate what our money and material goods mean to us and our identity. The things we buy are identity statements, and a lot of times these aren’t conscious decisions.

[24:17] - Many of our beliefs about money are at a subconscious level, and we don’t often spend as much time as we should exploring where identity markers come from. Some of them are ones that we’ve embraced as our own, and some, we have inherited. Our feelings about and reactions to certain situations can help us draw some identity lines. If you’re in a job or career, and you’re not inspired or challenged by the people you’re surrounded by, it might be time to find a different path, or surround yourself with different people.

[30:13] - It is also important to understand what your role in your work or life situation is. As your life shifts and changes, you also have to expand your role in these different situations. If you’re the one inspiring those around you, you also need to find a space where you’re inspired and challenged for growth as well.

[32:32] - This relates to money because if what you’re doing isn’t making you happy, you’re going to be spending your hard-earned money doing the things that make you happy to fill that hole. You may be making more money doing something that doesn’t fulfill you and spend it trying to make yourself happy, or you can find the things that fill you up, with the chance that you might make a bit less.

[35:37] - It is helpful to remember that we curate our identity for other people. If your marker for whether or not you should do something is based on what other people have curated, it may not be an accurate depiction. That’s where the internal markers come in - what is true for you will endure.

[39:41] - You have to be careful not to rationalize your actions too much if you’re stuck in a place you don’t really want to be in. If you are in that position, where you need to do something unfavorable for a certain amount of time - maybe taking a part time job or stepping back from something - you have to be intentional about when you are going to resume your original work. If you leave this up to chance, you may never return to your original project.

[46:20] - Set real timelines for yourself, whether it is an amount of time, or maybe working a job until you save a certain amount of money. Whatever it is, have that tripwire and hold yourself accountable; otherwise, later could become never.

[47:22] - When we think about money, many of us don’t think about our identity or feelings. One of the biggest challenges is that we tend to make it about the intelligence part, rather than the heart, which can provide guidance on how to move forward. Everything around the numbers or money has a lot to do with your circumstances, choices, beliefs, expectations, and failures and successes. The better we get about not feeling bad about where we may have fallen short, the more we will be able to use money as a communication tool that allows us to speak to ourselves and other people in a different way.

[51:10] - Jacquette’s invitation/challenge to listeners is to go back and pull the last three months of banking and credit card statements (“Roll Call”), and indicate on every transaction whether it was something that made you a happy, mandatory, or maybe something you regret now. As you tally it up, you will get a great amount of data about what you’re doing with your money, and also where you might want to make some changes so you’re getting more from your money for your life.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Jacquette’s Timmons

Financial Intimacy, by Jacquette Timmons

Productive Flourishing Podcast Episode 49: Financial Success Doesn’t Start in Your Wallet with Jacquette Timmons

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ADHD can make focusing on creative work particularly difficult. Today’s guest, Ryan McRae, was diagnosed with ADHD and works with people who have ADHD. In today’s episode, Charlie and Ryan explore what it’s like when you have ADHD and you’re trying to be productive and focused. While people with ADHD have a harder time focusing, their challenges and the strategies they use to overcome them can work wonders for all of us.

Key Takeaways:

[2:35] - Ryan was diagnosed with ADHD when he was 18, during his first year of college. He noticed that the lack of structure going from high school and college made it hard for him to stay on track. He realized that he didn’t have the same ability to attend and focus in class as other students, and this started back in elementary school for him.

[7:01] - There may be a misconception about people with ADHD that they are also distracted. Sometimes, they may be hyperfocused on something when they’re interested, so much so that they forget about everything else. It’s a distinction between consumption and creation.

[8:11] - Ryan has learned to deal with the different ways ADHD manifests itself, and talks about some of his strategies for redirecting and getting focused on what needs to get done. One of the things that’s important for him is managing his energy level in a way that allows him to accomplish his goals.

[11:35] - Technology pushes more of us toward having function ADHD - all the notifications and other distractions involved in technology can get us into vicious cycles of checking things on technology devices. Once you get started or distracted, and can be really hard to get back on track.

[12:53] - For people with ADHD, they have to manage it in their own way, and be hyper aware of potential distractions or the feeling of creative work being really hard. When you switch tasks, there is a lag time to get yourself back on track.

[15:24] - When Ryan is trying to be productive, he describes it as a zombie apocalypse: you have to create barriers and things that take down distractions. He has a bag (a go-bag) that he keeps in his car that has writing supplies.

[19:00] - Our brains are not meant to be keepers of short-term information. Both Ryan and Charlie keep notebooks on hand to get their ideas out when they have them. Having “analog” items can be helpful because they will never pull you in a different direction than you want to go, like perhaps a phone or tablet might. He has a blue book where he records lists and other materials to continuously reference.

[23:45] - When Ryan wants to get focused, he constructs an environment that will allow him to achieve that focus. For him, that is sitting in the same place in a coffee shop. He also makes sure he has the right tools for whatever task he’s working on. When he’s working, he likes to work in big multi-hour chunks. For tasks that are small and annoying, he has developed systems to overcome these distractions or remove them from his life.

[26:55] - Managing ADHD is similar to managing willpower fatigue. People with ADHD have less control over willpower. Removing the requirement that you use your willpower to complete a task can be helpful in accomplishing things like going to the grocery store. For people with ADHD, their decision fatigue may occur quicker than others so they have to find ways to save energy in other places.

[29:50] - Systems are a powerful thing to help you be more focused and creative. Structure and creativity are aligned forces in the ability to do your best work. Ryan has a system for writing where he outlines during one session, and does the writing during a different session, and edits in another session. For people with or without ADHD, trying to do all of this in the same session is a bad idea.

[35:20] - This same idea applies to other big projects in our lives - you can prepare the plan, and then carry it out. Ryan works with his clients on this idea to help them outline the steps to accomplish their projects. Outlining the steps to take, and what you want the final result to look like can make focusing on the work easier.

[39:10] - Ryan’s ADHD comes in handy because he can think on his feet very well. He shares a cheeky story of how this came in handy, and how he was able to process quickly what needed to be said and how to do it.

[44:05] - Ryan’s challenge for listeners is to find something that you’ve always had to make a decision on, and reduce one decision in your life so you can clear out some of the clutter in your life. If that works, keep doing that and reduce those choices.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Ryan McRae: ADHD Nerd

App: Headspace

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Jessica Abel is the author of La Perdida, and the Chair of the illustration program at the Pennsylvania Academy of Fine Arts. Both within and outside the academy, she helps creative people with big ideas get past procrastination and anxiety, and get on to do their best work. In today’s episode, Jessica and Charlie talk about what happens when creativity and productivity teachers get stuck, and how they go about getting unstuck.

Key Takeaways:

[2:47] - This is Jessica’s second year as a full time professor and department head. She is currently juggling curriculum projects, teaching courses, and working on her comic book. And when those are finished, there is still more on the horizon.

[5:40] - For Jessica, most of the struggle comes from project creep, but also underestimating the amount of time and concentration it is going to take to do the course along with everything else she’s involved in.

[6:50] - She is able to teach this because she can relate, and she sees how well her students are able to put it into practice. One of the biggest parts of what she teaches is the self-forgiveness piece. Don’t be easy on yourself, but you have to forgive yourself and start over every day.

[7:50] - When you have a multi-domain life, and it can be hard to achieve the ideal of one big goal. Each domain of life has different ways in which it intersects with the others, and while you may have one big goal in one domain, there are so many domains. Sometimes, deciding on one goal in a certain area of your life can help you find some peace.

[10:37] - Thinking about getting into the mindset to work can provide a distraction from the actual doing of the work. Setting deadlines for yourself can be helpful to some degree, but it is good to be able to do this without stress and anxiety.

[15:37] - For Jessica, she doesn’t think anxiety and pressure have to be a part of the process. Most things take you two to three times the amount of time you think they’re going to take you. If you set a deadline for yourself for say one week, decide it’s okay if it takes you three weeks, then you can still work without that pressure because you’ve allowed yourself the time for it to take a little longer.

[19:25] - With multiple projects on her plate, how does Jessica work through knowing where she is right now? Sometimes, this involves taking a project off her list and putting it off for another time. This is Charlie’s familiar concept of the project cage match. Jessica talks about idea debt, where the energy of holding all those things in your head at once is a lot, and sometimes, it is better to relinquish a project up front before you spend emotional energy on it. It’s important to follow up on projects you’ve planned for, and decide if they are still relevant when they come back up.

[27:05] - As creative individuals, we want our creative projects to spur new creative thoughts and ideas. Over time, your joy of doing something may not be sufficient to prioritize doing it. Jessica tries to chase complexity and intellectual engagement in her creative projects. The core motivation shifts over time as you become a more mature creative person, to appreciate the interplay of the elements you’re trying to master.

[33:50] - You can’t let trying to go deeper into your creative work enable you to procrastinate and not actually do the work. There is going to be creative discomfort somewhere, and when we get stuck we may have to displace the discomfort to keep moving forward.

[38:50] - Many artists and creative people have groups where they talk to each other about their work and about getting stuck and how they move through that. You don’t have to figure it out alone! You can also challenge yourself by giving yourself constraints to help support your creativity.

[43:30] - This concept goes back to the idea of deadlines, and how they can help us get our work done. Having a healthy deadline or constraint can catalyze the creative process, the same way having an unhealthy deadline can undermine the creative process.

[45:50] - Creative constraints can push you to places you’ve never gone before. Whenever you get stuck, you can change your context, where you do your work, or you can switch constraints and see if that helps get the process going. Referencing your own previous work with a different set of rules can also be very beneficial.

[50:00] - We tend to abandon things too quickly. Once we finish something, we generally move right on to the next thing without allowing the first thing to settle. There’s a balance between revisiting your old hits and presenting new material.

[55:55] - Jessica’s challenge is to take something that is really important to you, an idea or work, and transform it into another form. Don’t just rewrite it, but take it and make something else out of it. See if that doesn’t start to bring out something really brand new in it for you.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Jessica Abel

La Perdida, by Jessica Abel

Growing Gills, by Jessica Abel

Leap First, by Seth Godin

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What do we do when we’re feeling guilty about not being productive? Today’s episode is a discussion on the topic of productivity guilt. Charlie and Angela discuss some of the different ways productivity guilt can manifest itself, as well as provide some perspective and encouragement about whether we’re truly not being productive. These guidelines can help determine whether a change needs to be made.

Key Takeaways:

[2:14] - Oftentimes, when we talk about productivity, we focus on work and primarily the work we are not doing. But usually, to feel that guilt, you are doing something.

[3:45] - Anything you do that helps you flourish and become the person you want to be in the world, can and should be counted as productive. Eating, exercising, being a great a parent - all of these things make you a productive person.

[6:12] - Is what you’re doing actually a waste of time? This is a question you can use to help yourself gauge whether you’re really being productive. Charlie suggests evaluating a task by determining if you’re generating the results you need to be generating. If you’re not, something may need to change.

[9:20] - We are hardwired to be productive. Your body can be a good indicator of when you are accomplishing things, and on the flip side, when there are changes that you may need make.

[11:05] - Many people have the assumption about themselves that they are not a productive person. Everyone should have the assumption that they are productive, they are creative, and they want to get things done. When you’re doubting your productivity, whose voice and judgment are you using to determine that?

[12:53] - Charlie and Angela discuss our habit of comparing ourselves to others, and the trend of being okay with some aspect of ourselves (salary, level of productivity), until you learn about someone else’s and start comparing yourself to them. The more your friends are high achievers, the more you have to watch out for this. You have to have a lot of information about someone’s general context before you can fairly evaluate yourself against them.

[16:24] - When we talk about comparing ourselves to others and feeling guilt, it comes back to a conversation about priorities. If you are clear about what your priorities are, and you’re spending your time and energy on them, that’s the way it should be! The results may be different from someone else’s, but that’s because your priorities are different.

[19:57] - Today’s pace of life is setting the scenario for not allowing ourselves space to be human, and we’re trying to do a lot. Setting realistic expectations for what you can commit to, achieve, and be proud of can be good motivation. Stand on small successes and build from there.

[23:42] - For entrepreneurs, if you’ve been planting for a long time but you’re not yielding what you want, you may have a money model problem. You’re not alone! You may have to find another economic outlet that you can do simultaneously while growing your business.

[27:35] - The conversation about productivity is not just about things counted, but about moments spent and lives nourished. Looking at it this way can give you a better lens for whether you’re being productive or not.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

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The decision to go all in can be a big one. Today’s guest, Ronen Gafni, founder of Fresh Biz and co-author of The New Entrepreneurs, joins Charlie to discuss the importance of going all in and betting on yourself. In addition to discussing some misconceptions about what it means to go all in, they also talk about some of the counter-intuitive truths about entrepreneurship, especially how it relates to how you’re charging for your value.

Key Takeaways:

[2:20] - There are three different types of “going all in.” Ronen relates them to poker: The first type is throwing yourself into something with no skill or idea of how it works. The second type is going all in thinking you can fool those around you that you know what you’re doing. The third way that Ronen is talking about is when you know you have a winning hand, and you’re willing to risk something to really go for it.

[5:30] - Sometimes, we have trouble putting all our chips on us and our own abilities. Ronen encourages people to begin to trust themselves more and bet on themselves. It’s a little harder than going in on external systems, where we have someone else to blame when things go wrong.

[8:32] - How do you determine if you have a good hand or not? When it comes to entrepreneurship, it’s not about having the best hand at the table; it’s just about having a good hand. You don’t have to be the only one who is winning - there are all kinds of different wins. The first element to a good hand is the ability to learn, and the second is to understand and know that you can handle the falls and the punches you will face.

[13:03] - There are foundations for creative and entrepreneurial successes. Knowing when to stick and when to pivot, and knowing the core things that customers value can take you a long way. It is important to cover these basics so you can focus on the uniqueness and the value that you bring. At the end of the day, the only competition is about getting the attention of the customer.

[16:30] - Ronen shares the story of getting to a point of going all in on a business. FreshBiz started in this way. FreshBiz is a training company based on a board game that Ronen developed - it teaches you the skills to know and understand today’s economy. The original idea was just to develop a game, but once it was developed, he had to decide if it was going to become a business, or just be a project he was a part of and be put aside. One of the concerns was his debt, and in order to make FreshBiz a business, he had to decide if he was going to sell his house to pay back the debt and invest the rest in the business.

[20:40] - While this was going on with Ronen’s business, he also had a commitment to his family. His wife, who is like-minded about self-development, was open to the conversation about selling their house to alleviate some credit card debt and fulfilling the goals of FreshBiz. Coming at it from a self-development perspective made it easier to discuss, though the decision was still difficult.

[26:21] - The infrastructure of the self-development process is very important. It’s always about the mindset and the story you choose to tell yourself. A big discussion for Ronen and his wife was whether they were really connected to the specific house itself, and then it became a financial decision: would they be able to sell this house and make more money in their business to buy a new home?

[31:45] - Ronen’s original idea for FreshBiz was just to be the game, but it quickly became something more meaningful for other people. It grew organically as people were seeking a way to better understand themselves. For Ronen, the entire process was figuring out how the game generateed a way for people to understand themselves.

[37:00] - For a lot of entrepreneurs, the thing that’s most natural and easiest for you is usually the thing that other people latch onto as being incredibly valuable. These are the things you should be charging the most for, rather than the things that are hard for you. It is a big step for many entrepreneurs to recognize their gift and charge for it.

[39:52] - Right now, Ronen’s new challenge is looking at going all in globally. They are active in about 20 countries, and are looking at travelling more to grow the business around the globe. Some of the things keeping him from jumping all in are family (being away from his wife and kids), as well as the flying and travelling.

[42:15] - Charlie and Ronen talk about sufficiency points - this is about finding the right level for your business and your life. For Ronen, moving to the next level is not necessarily about the business goals, but has more to do with his mission in life. He wants to personally deliver his message to different parts of the world.

[45:50] - Ronen’s invitation for listeners: Go all in for something that you feel comfortable enough with that you could learn what you need to learn, and be willing to stand up again if there is a setback. Understand that you have a winning hand just because you are who you are, and go for it!

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

FreshBiz

The New Entrepreneurz: Changing the Way You Play Life, by Ronen Gafni and Simcha Gluck

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Ishita Gupta is a leadership and business strategist who was the head of media of the Domino Project for two years, and is a sought-after speaker. She joins Charlie today to talk about rebuilding her life and business. After a confluence of major life transitions, Ishita went home to refortify herself with her parents, only to realize her parents were in a health and business crisis that she needed to attend to.

Key Takeaways:

[4:20] - Ishita shares some of what she’s been challenged by in the last two years. She has been working as a business coach and publishing her online magazine for a while, but in 2015 she became very burnt out with her work - she was working a lot and feeling stressed and very tired. In addition to work stress, she was in an unhealthy relationship as well.

[7:30] - This point became a big wake up call for Ishita to get away and slow down a bit. She moved back to Detroit with her parents, and realized her mom was having major health issues, which began to affect her mother’s business as well. At this point, she had to give up her own healing to focus on caring for and helping her parents.

[11:55] - The last two years have given Ishita some of the biggest lessons of her life, and taught her to challenge some of the things she previously believed. These lessons include surrender, acceptance but not approval, and being okay with uncertainty.

[12:53] - For the first full year, Ishita felt embarrassed by talking about her situation. This translated to the communication in her business and online presence; however, she did have her core support group to talk with, and she learned that everyone just needs someone to listen sometimes.

[16:04] - In 2016, she had to stop her business for a period of time so she could take care of herself. Being real with her clients, and their understanding, was an important part of her healing process.

[17:45] - Charlie shares his experience with a period of grief, and not really being able to share too much with other people. It could be helpful to just let other people know that something is going on, even if you don’t want to go into the details.

[18:57] - Business stacks on life, not the other way around, and sometimes the business of life is the business. If you need someone to talk to, be careful of the people who are well-meaning fixers, when you may just need a well-meaning listener.

[21:27] - One of the big lessons from Ishita’s story is that even when there were times she couldn’t perform, she still survived. If you’re at a point where your business pays the bills but you’re unable to make ends meet, let yourself off the hook for a period of time. It doesn’t always feel good, but you’ll be able to make it through.

[24:21] - For the compartmentalizers, while it’s good that you can put stuff away to get through work or family issues, be aware that those things are stil there. But it is okay to give yourself permission to be going through a hard time.

[27:00] - One of the challenges of entrepreneurship is when it becomes a self-aspirational label. This becomes a situation when your business is not working, and you can’t make a change as an entrepreneur. You’re not a failure if you have to get a 9-5 job for a period of time. Charlie shares four key points for people in a rut: know where you are, where you’re going, have a road map between those two places, and know what to do when your plans doesn’t match reality. Part of the challenge is accepting where you are right now, and being adaptable to change. Ishita shares some of her struggle with this, and how she was able to turn the situation around into one where she had the freedom to be herself. Moving forward, she will have all the lessons she’s learned in the last two years to add to her plan.

[31:06] - Many people feel the most trapped in the areas where they have stuck their energies or minds. You have to give yourself permission to let go and focus on what other stuff needs to be done.

[33:50] - Life can be good and hard at the same time. You have to learn how to hold on to the great moments in the middle of grief. Finding the people you can talk to about it, and being okay with what is, are the first steps in being okay with the shifts it could cause in your life.

[36:15] - Ishita talks about struggling with finding a balance between oversharing to the point of too much information, and under-sharing where you don’t allow yourself to connect with your readers or listeners. For her personally, if she doesn’t share in some capacity, she won’t be able to show up for her clients in an authentic way. As you work through this for yourself, you’ll find what level of sharing is comfortable for you. For Charlie, the important thing is knowing how sharing can prevent you from or enable you to move forward.

[40:07] - In your business or personal brand, what attracts people to you is your Achilles’ heel. If you cover up too much of your vulnerability, people might find it difficult to relate to you. The ownership of these vulnerabilities is important in sharing it with others and also claiming and taming it for yourself.

[45:20] - Sometimes, it can be very helpful to escape from the reality of your hard situation and if you can, give that time to someone else. For Ishita, if she can still help someone and deliver results, she finds that it really helps her. The idea that you have to be in your perfect state to do your best work is a point worth challenging, and will be different for everyone.

[48:11] - For people who may have more trouble compartmentalizing, it can help to identify the bad stuff, but then also look for the good stuff that fuels you and that you can use to anchor you throughout the day. Balancing the less favorable stuff with the nourishing parts of your life can help you navigate through the hard times. Breaking things down can help you focus on the things that are going to help you grow, and identify those that perhaps are not worth investing in anymore.

[54:45] - Sometimes, it’s about making the situation suck 1% less rather than making it 1% better. Making progress on the good things as well as making progress on the bad things can provide us with additional motivation to keep moving forward.

[58:10] - When you surrender in some way, that’s where solutions can start to come from.

[59:00] - Ishita’s invitation for listeners: Recognize that your best work does not always have to come from perfect times. Some of Ishita’s best work has come from her messier moments. Make your mess your message - take ownership of your life, your lessons, and the way you want to share them with the world.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Ishita Gupta

The Domino Project

The Progress Principle, by Teresa Amabile and Steven Kramer

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Today’s guest, best-selling author Vanessa Van Edwards, joins Charlie to talk about human interaction and succeeding with people. You might think that someone who writes about people is a raging extrovert, but that’s not always the case. Vanessa refers to herself as a “recovering awkward person.” In today’s episode, she and Charlie talk about how much they actually prepare and set themselves up to be comfortable in social settings, rather than leaving it to chance and charm.

Key Takeaways:

[3:05] - Vanessa shares a little bit of her background, moving from being a socially awkward person to someone who is writing books about winning with people. She talks about two different types of awkwardness: an inhibitive awkwardness that causes you to shut down around others, or an awkwardness that causes you to overcompensate when you’re around other people. She believes both are born out of fear, and it’s important to know which way your social fears will manifest themselves.

[5:27] - Charlie defines himself as an ambivert, depending on the context. In a comfortable environment, he may appear as an extrovert, whereas in less familiar environments, he tends to be an introvert. Vanessa shares her personal experience with this at the World Domination Summit and what she did over the course of several years to make herself more comfortable in the context of this conference.

[10:30] - If you’re an ambivert (or an introvert), it can be helpful to have some go-to questions that you can ask when you approach people in a social setting. Vanessa talks about preparation for events and conversations, and making plans that provide structure for the course of an evening or help to guide an interaction. Charlie recommends asking questions that don’t require too much personal vulnerability, but still allow the conversation to flow.

[15:00] - When Vanessa was doing networking experiments for her book, she found that some questions really attracted extroverts, while the same questions could push an introvert into fear. The specific question in this case was “What’s your story?,” but regardless of the question, you have to be sensitive to how people will exhibit their social fears.

[18:50] - If there is a question you don’t like being asked, you can prepare an answer that you’re comfortable with so if someone asks you, you can keep the conversation moving and gravitate into more comfortable territory.

[20:50] - The swan effect is where something appears easy, comfortable, and graceful on the surface, when underneath there is a lot of work and preparation required to maintain that appearance.

[25:07] - It takes time to get to the place you want to be, whether it’s in your business or a relationship, and that’s okay. Both Vanessa and Charlie can speak from experience that it takes a lot of hard work and not-so-glamorous preparation to get on the path to where you want to go.

[29:12] - Before Captivate, Vanessa had written three books that didn’t do so well. Her first book was self-published and self-promoted, and she used her baby-sitting money to publish it. This one actually did relatively well, but gave Vanessa a little bit of a false sense of confidence. The second book was also self-published, but didn’t do as well. With her third book, she went with a traditional publisher, but there was no public response.

[33:45] - It took five years for Vanessa to come back from this rejection of her book, but the fourth book was a turning point for her. During this time she wanted to blame other people, but she realized that she wrote the book based on what she thought the publishers wanted, not for her or her current readers. When she asked herself what she could write just for her and her readers, that’s where she found a pivot point.

[39:07] - In Charlie’s writing experience, the book proposal was often a difficult obstacle to tackle. One of the worst ways to try to write a book is trying to write it to how someone else wants, rather than in a way that’s magical to you. Vanessa talks about the model for a platform that most people feel they have to follow. There’s a window in which you feel confident enough to write about a topic and be successful, but the idea is not yet stale to you. That’s the ideal window you want to be in.

[44:18] - There are three options for publishing. You can self-publish, or if you go with a traditional publisher you can either get a small advance where the company has little stake in the game, or a large advance where there’s something in it for the publisher. In the case of a large advance, they may be more willing to help with marketing and support. You want someone to have their name on the line for you at the publishing house.

[48:10] - Create the types of things that you want to consume. Just because you can create something, it doesn’t mean you should.

[49:55] - How did Vanessa become emotionally prepared enough to go with a traditional publisher for her fourth book? She had advocates on her side who gave her confidence in herself and encouraged her to write what she wanted. She also felt that not having a book was preventing her from being able to help people.

[54:45] - Vanessa found her business and personal sweet spot by adding structure to different areas of her life. It takes time to develop these things, but the payout is worth it.

[56:35] - Vanessa’s challenge for listeners is to pick one event or meeting that you’ve been dreading, and come up with a purpose for it. Think about how you can set yourself up for success to achieve that purpose, and see if it changes the apprehension surrounding the interaction.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Captivate: The Science of Succeeding with People

The Science of People

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In today’s episode, Angela joins Charlie to talk about personal change. Most of the work that’s done at Productive Flourishing is around personal transformation and self-mastery. In Angela’s new coaching role, she’s been doing more and more of this with others. Charlie and Angela share some of the changes they’ve made in their personal lives over the last year, and how their relationship fits into how they navigated these changes.

Key Takeaways:

[2:05] - For Charlie, the impetus for personal change often comes from something specific that has happened in his life, and figuring out what he can do to fix it. He is constantly changing and working on things, and likes to experiment with them in his own life before he shares them with others.

[3:15] - For Angela, she sometimes lets things get really painful (physically or emotionally) before she makes a decision to change and follows through with the decision.

[5:32] - Charlie talks about the dynamic in their house; both Angela and Charlie are coaches and empathetic people, so they’ve had to learn how to constructively invite change dialogue into their home life outside of their work. Attentive listening, thoughtful questions, and knowing the right time and context to bring up issues of habits and change help to guide their discussions.

[10:00] - One of the most counter-productive things you can do is trying to get someone to change when they aren’t ready, and they don’t want support.

[12:50] - Charlie shares a time where his daily work was presenting a type of pain or discomfort. For Charlie, working too much or too long was causing him to feel more and more pain.

[17:52] - The Kaizen approach encourages incremental, small changes over time that add up to a big effect. The trick is knowing whether it’s time to take an incremental step or tip over an edge with a big change.

[20:25] - When Charlie began noticing pain, he started to incorporate 30 minutes of movement each day, and also invited daily writing into his practice. This spurred some adjustment to his schedule so he’s only working 8 hours a day, which has affected not only him but Angela and the team as well.

[28:15] - It is important to consider how the changes will impact those around you. For Charlie, he is still uncertain and nervous about how his new practices might interfere with the relationships he has with people. Being aware of what conversations might need to happen in the face of change is important so that you can create and maintain boundaries.

[34:05] - Charlie introduces the five keys to managing change, which will be the focus of the next book he’s writing: intention, awareness, boundaries, courage, and discipline.

[37:50] - Angela shares some of the personal changes she has been making throughout the course of the last year. One of the main changes is centered around weight and diet. In February, she made a pretty dramatic change and went on a diet that helped change her metabolism. This was an important change because it would affect not only Angela, but Charlie as well.

[42:35] - He started out on the diet with Angela out of solidarity, but also had to learn a balance between encouragement and looking out for Angela’s best interests.

[47:50] - When you’re in relationships with people, some of the things that matter the most are the most awkward to talk about.

[50:36] - It is important to note that everyone will experience and handle personal change differently, based on your life experiences. Not everyone’s journey is going to be the same when it comes to the difficult, but it is important to make sure you’re on the right road for you.

[55:14] - Charlie’s invitation/challenge for this episode: Think about what incremental steps you could start taking today that would make your life a little easier. Starting with a small change can build the foundation for making other changes that could have a big payoff over the course of a year. Is there a big change you could make?

57:28] - Angela’s invitation for this episode: Be gentle - be kind with yourself, and make a purposeful decision about what it is that you want to change.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

What Do You Need to Form Healthy Habits that Stick?, by Charlie Gilkey

The Two Dynamics of Change, by Charlie Gilkey

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Michael “Gebbs” Gebben joins Charlie on today’s episode. Michael founded Gebbs TV only to realize he was building something that was making him miserable. After reconfiguring his business to work for him, he realized that he had a major problem: his use of credit cards disguised his understanding of the success of his business and led to debt. The conversation today centers on the prisons we make for ourselves, how easy it is to build these prisons, and how hard it is to break free of them.

Key Takeaways:

[2:35] - Growing up, Gebbs had always had an entrepreneurial streak, and combined with his background in filmmaking, he got a job making slideshows for funeral homes. This sparked the idea for Gebbs Total Production. As the company began to grow, he realized that the filmmaking aspect was more his dad’s dream and he wasn’t really into it. He found himself low on time, low on money, and very behind in delivering product to his clients.

[7:15] - He decided to narrow his focus and took a stand on the way he wanted to do things, and that’s when things started to happen. By not agreeing to do everything (just because you can), and doing the things you’re best at, people will honor that. This exposes your ability to make a decision, your ability to be a pro, and your ability to be the best in your local world.

[10:50] - These days, the product is not usually the most important thing. The differentiation starts to be the person behind the product. Gebbs shares his example of people paying more or bringing him on location for a video, versus someone local, because they like the substance that he himself brings to the job. You can’t win on pixels - or whatever medium your product delivers - but you can win on process, experience, and expertise.

[17:25] – Gebbs and Charlie talk about the importance of taking action - it brings clarity and confidence. Getting your product out into the world allows you to receive feedback from consumers. Finishing allows for mastery as well as income.

[20:05] – When Gebbs found the sweet spot with Gebbs Total Video, he found success, freedom, and time to do the things he loved. The process of becoming self-aware allowed him to break out of the prison he had made for himself by taking on projects that he wasn’t excited about, resulting in mediocre product. Identifying the root problem allowed him to prevent the same surface problems from showing up.

[25:40] – There is a lot of hard work that goes into running your own business. Oftentimes, when people start their own businesses, they start as an expert in their trade wanting to do more. Starting your own business adds many other factors in addition to the trade, sometimes leaving only a small amount of time to actually do your trade. Being self-aware of what works for you is important to figure out what option will let you flourish doing what you love.

[31:20] – Personal development is more like a corkscrew, rather than a circle. We might encounter similar problems throughout the different stages of our lives. Each time we come back to them they are at different and deeper levels. Problems and challenges will always arise, and you will continue to be challenged and tested by similar things, though maybe in different ways. Accepting and embracing this is important to overcoming those challenges and being ready to face them any time they arise.

[35:50] - How you deal with challenges is totally different when you’re aware of them. Being self aware also allows you to help and encourage others when they encounter similar difficulties. When you find the sweet spot, you get more time and freedom to spend your energy on the things that matter.

[42:00] - When you become aware of your patterns and blind spots, you can build life support structures around those things, so they are not always crippling. If you want to change these patterns in your life, you have to ask yourself how you are actively participating in those scenarios, and which ways you are showing up in those scenarios. This allows for greater self-reflection about the root of the problem.

[47:40] - Gebbs talks about how he found himself in a large amount of debt, and how he is now working to overcome it. He was charging everything on credit, and needed more money than he was making to pay all his bills. As he figured out a way to work to pay off the debt, he recognized a deeper problem and has been able to make changes to avoid finding himself in a similar situation down the road.

[55:55] - Being able to talk about this has allowed Gebbs to feel a new sense of freedom. Talking about it - without being judged - allows for ideas to be shared and to find people who have encountered and overcome these problems. Financial intelligence is especially important for entrepreneurs.

[1:00:40] - Scripted formulas and frameworks are not the simple solutions to the challenges we are going to face. Success takes hard work, not just in your business, but also in taking ownership of ourselves and our habits, and identifying the root problems. It is takes awhile, and that’s okay.

[1:08:20] - Gebbs’ challenge for listeners: If there’s something that you’re afraid of doing, just take the first step. Once you do that and experience that release, it gets easier and easier each time.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Michael “Gebbs” Gebben

GEBBS TV

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Jeffrey Davis is the founder of Tracking Wonder, a consultancy that mentors entrepreneurs, creatives, and brands to have influence with integrity. In his third appearance on the show, he and Charlie discuss why it’s so hard for leaders to stand for something, even after they’ve figured out what it is they stand for. It’s not just the fear of failure or being wrong. This episode is a continuation of ideas presented in a previous episode - to hear more after this, check out Episode 64.

Key Takeaways:

[3:25] - Some of the fears people have about standing out with their message is that they may be attacked, or lose clients and customers. The second one, more subtle, is that once you take a stance and it’s said out loud, the expectation is that you have to deliver on it.

[5:28] - With regards to the first fear, it is often a false belief that the trolls and haters will all of a sudden pop up and latch on to you. You might end up alienating a few people in your audience, but there are many other people that won’t notice or care. If you do attract opposing views, rather than viewing it as battle, use it as an opportunity for conversation. People who question a view or are curious can become your allies if you engage with them in a certain way.

[10:09] - Owning a message or taking a stance doesn’t mean that the ideas or stances are politically loaded or controversial. Sometimes, just the idea of taking a stance is controversial in itself . This is especially applicable in the corporate world to intrapreneurs and people working within corporate organizations.

[13:30] - There are certainly conversations to be had about taking a stance in the corporate world, but there are other topics in that realm that aren’t socially loaded. In terms of productivity, if at a certain point in your development you’re not finding places that are controversial in the sense that different experts disagree on them, you might need to do some more deep exploration to develop your own opinions to help you stand out and make an impression. Opposing ideas can create new ideas.

[16:26] - You can begin to develop your own thought leadership by mining and leveraging your irritations. You can take an idea that’s out in the world that you find irritating, and come up with the opposing idea that you want to contribute. This requires some deep work - owning your message is not just what you stand for, but what you stand against as well.

[19:25] - One of the reasons people fear standing out is because they don’t want to be the outlier or be ostracized. However, with the myriad of ideas in the world today, there are other people that are bound to share those beliefs or take the same stance. It is beneficial to surround yourself with a small group of people where you can try out your own ideas (and others).

[21:15] - Some of Jeffrey’s advice is to read what other people (professors, leaders) have to say about a certain topic, and then see where you can add your verse to the conversation. Start testing out your ideas and find where you can gain traction. That is how you begin to stand out by trial and error or experimentation.

[26:58] - Another reason people are afraid of standing out is because they might be wrong, in two ways: if what you thought was true is not true, or what you thought mattered most to you has changed. But if you’re wrong, that’s okay! You can take a stance and be right, or take a stance and be wrong, but both provide opportunities for exploration and growth. The only trajectories not worth taking are to not do anything, or perpetuate what you already know.

[30:15] - One thing Jeffrey suggests for people with a plethora of ideas is to distill your ideas down to a smaller number. When you start to narrow what you’re going to be about, you’re forced to go beyond just your initial opinion.

[32:20] - Another fear is that people don’t want to stand for a message because they don’t want to lock themselves into an idea box. When you find yourself fatigued with an idea or what you are associated with, tap in and see what’s fresh, and how you could turn that into a new stance.

[37:30] - As human beings, we have complex dimensions of being in the world, and we should have the permission to be our complex selves. People want complexity now, versus a generic brand that blends in.

[39:15] - As you stand for more and begin to produce more, you have to become a curator as well as a creator. The fears that have been discussed may stem from wanting people to see the rich person that you are. However, it’s important to note that your work does not encompass all of who you are. It can be a vehicle of expression, but there’s often more that is not represented. In addition, you may choose to represent or incorporate some aspects of yourself into your work, while intentionally leaving out others.

[47:00] - Developing constraints in our work allows for depth and experimentation within those constraints. This can allow you to hone your work and create a niche for it. Go in depth in certain areas, rather than trying to cover multiple areas.

[52:25] - Charlie and Jeffrey talk about the importance of creating for the future. Sometimes, it can be hard to set expectations for immediate response, but the work that stands out will continue to be relevant in the long-term.

[54:25] - If you’re not standing up for your message, then other people are only hearing counterproductive messages. Your silence only perpetuates whatever conversation you don’t like.

[56:45] - Jeffrey’s invitation to listeners: draw a chart with for and against, and at the top write what it is that you want to be known for. Under “for,” list variations and values that relate to the core message. On the right side under “against,” list the counter-messages and values that you’re against that relate to that core message. He challenges listeners to share something about that in the next 7 days.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Tracking Wonder

Productive Flourishing Podcast Episode 64: What Will You Stand For This Year?

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Michelle Jones, founder of the Wayfinding Academy, joins Charlie on the show to talk about the college experience for students at the Wayfinding Academy. Instead of spending two to four years taking classes and then figuring out who they want to be in the world, students learn to live life on purpose and then use that knowledge to sculpt their learning experience. One of the members of the first group of students, Austin Goldberg, also joins Michelle and Charlie to share his experience.

Key Takeaways:

[3:40] - Michelle shares the story of Wayfinding. Michelle had been working as a professor for 16 years, and she began feeling that the way higher education worked was backwards. Generally, students were asked to make decisions and determine plans up front, without getting a chance to discover their purpose until they were already finished. About two and a half years ago, Michelle decided to quit her job as a professor and start her own college to flip that experience around. At Wayfinding, they start with the questions first and determine what students want to do in the world, and how students and faculty can work together to figure out the steps to achieve it. When they leave Wayfinding, students know what they’re doing and in most cases are already doing it.

[7:40] - In higher education, there seems to be a front-loading of the question “What do you want to do?” Often times, this makes students have to choose an occupation rather than focusing on who they want to be in the world. At Wayfinding Academy, students receive their Associate’s Degree in “Self and Society.” Throughout their education, students explore who they are, as well as what is going on in the world, and the goal is to figure out how they can put those two things together in a meaningful way. From there, it is presumed that students will figure out a way to earn an income in a way that supports the life they want to have.

[9:40] - While there may still be career pivots in the adult journey of those students, Wayfinding helps students learn how to ask the appropriate questions to figure out how to navigate those transitions.

[12:23] - At Wayfinding, they focus on the six character traits outlined in their promise:

1. Empowered to thrive throughout the rest of their lives 2. Embrace curiosity 3. Willing to stretch 4. Understand the importance of conscientiousness 5. Know how to create community and 6. Understand what it means to live life on purpose.

[13:37] - Within those character traits, they identify 10 learning objectives, some of which are, how to ask good questions, how to be a good critical thinker, how to collaborate, why story matters, what it takes to do something epic, and how to make a plan for something hard that requires other people’s help. These skills are transferrable no matter what students choose to do.

[15:53] - As the Chief Academic Officer, Michelle has been collecting data to gauge the effectiveness of the program and students. When they started looking to hire additional crew members, they began to examine what qualities they expect of their staff and how that overlaps with what they expect of their students. This helped to shape their promise.

[19:20] - Austin shares his experience about discovering and getting started with Wayfinding Academy. When he was approaching high school graduation, he was on the traditional trajectory to graduate and go to a traditional college. He talks about the events of the first year of his college experience that made him start to question and evaluate his place there.

[23:20] - Austin talks about how it was difficult to choose something other than the trajectory he was already on, but he knew the environment at the private business school wasn’t for him. He started to look for people and places that cared about the things he cared about, which is how he ended up in Portland and discovered Wayfinding.

[25:52] - One of the great things about Wayfinding is there is a lot of freedom to do the things you want to do and discover the things that you’re interested in. For Austin, he has been able to discover how to express his creativity. He states that this vulnerability is also some of the hardest work they do at Wayfinding. The most important thing he’s learned about doing this type of work is that no matter what the outlet is, it’s going to bring to light the same issues and challenges Austin (and all students) faces in life, because it tests personality traits more than occupational traits.

[31:00] - One of the fundamental aspects of Wayfinding is that when you live your life on purpose, and do work purposefully that matters to you, all your “stuff” does come up. Charlie talks about one of the labs he taught at Wayfinding, and Austin shares his experience working through the project of that lab, what he learned from it, and how it has carried over into other aspects of his life.

[36:15] - One of the big projects Austin has been working on during his time at Wayfinding is figuring out what it means to do something epic or live an epic life. He speaks about what he has learned about this during his experience so far.

[40:07] - Michelle talks about some other students’ journeys. Student cohorts are made up of a diverse age range, but they all focus on living life on purpose and being in a supportive learning community as they figure that out. The Wayfinding experience seems to work equally well for people who have a small idea of what they want to do with their lives and people who have no idea.

[45:24] - Michelle discusses the guide program at Wayfinding. This was an aspect that couldn’t truly be tested until they actually had students, but they’ve done some experimenting to figure out what seems to work. Developing the guide program has also opened conversation with the students to help shape the role of the guides.

[52:06] - Michelle and Charlie talk about some of the unique aspects of figuring out the systems within such a dynamic program. It has been a process for the faculty and students alike to determine what is going to work best for their program.

[55:45] - Austin’s invitation for listeners: Look for areas in your life where you are doing things a certain way just because that’s how they’re done, and challenge that. You don’t always have to do things one way just because that’s how they’ve always been done.

[57:01] - Michelle’s invitation to listeners: If after listening to today’s episode, you were inspired by or desire to be a part of this program, reach out and start a conversation! The next cohort starts on August 28th, and they are always looking for new friends, fans, and supporters.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Wayfinding Academy

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Larry Robertson, author of two award-winning books, joins Charlie on the show today to talk about growth, creative edges, play, uncertainty, and how our relationship with our work changes the longer we do it. This episode is a bit of an extension of a post Larry wrote for Productive Flourishing.

Key Takeaways:

[2:12] - What do we do when we come up to a growth edge when we’re out in creative exploration? When the curiosity and wonder stops fueling you, you can get stuck because you’re afraid or don’t know how to move forward. Larry is going to share his three growth-oriented ways to tackle this, and give some examples at different levels.

[3:45] - There is always going to be an edge between what you know, and what you will soon know. What’s interesting about those places is that we’re drawn to them - whether there’s something more we’d like to know, or there’s something more we can do better or do differently. Larry suggests that we may be fearful as we approach these edges because we feel that once we cross over the edge we’ll have to understand everything right away, or we’ll have to take a giant leap into something new. It is okay to make it a habit rather than a solution, as you continue to cross and work toward new edges.

[6:25] - It is important to recognize and understand that we can still push the edge while investing the time to become masterful at something. It’s not an either/or action - these are things you can do simultaneously. Additionally, you can grow your edges outwards to include new fields, or grow your edges deeper into a field you’re already invested in.

[8:45] - Oftentimes we may feel like our environment is putting us in a position that we either have to be in control, or we have to be creative. The irony is that we’re always both; the balance is different for each person, and for each person it’s different at different times. Having “certainty anchors” can ground you to the certain parts of your life as your explore the unknown edges.

[12:30] - How do you approach the edge between the known and unknown, and what do we do once we get there? Some different ideas include starting from your anchor to explore something new, asking questions to figure out how to explore something new or going off the edge, and exploring new territory with those certainty anchors that remind you where you’re headed and why you’re heading there.

[14:28] - Charlie adds a fourth piece: a mindset piece. When we are exploring edges, it’s okay that we don’t know, and we have to be comfortable with not being competent at some points. This gives us the freedom to stumble as we’re moving forward, without worrying about the consequences. Larry talks about “lucky people” and how they approach these edges with a sense of playfulness.

[19:32] - Charlie shares an example in his own life about joining the board at Social Ventures Partners. Many people think they are going to regret the decisions they make or the things they do, but more often than not, people regret the times they could’ve explored the edge and did not. Larry shares the examples of Larry Bird and Magic Johnson and how they used this philosophy during their basketball careers and their pursuits after.

[24:18] - Charlie reflects on his stories since he resigned from the military, and how this has affected his strategic plays - they are more long-term rather than quick, in-the-moment decisions. Once you get to a certain point, most of your adventure is long-term creative and social exploration.

[26:45] - Many of us start in a scenario where we’re “young” - whether that be in age or in our career. Whenever we’re young at something, we tend to see things in a shorter way, so our targets are about the most immediate success we can define. We lack the experience that comes from spending more time in something. Larry relates this to his changing role as a parent as his son gets ready to go to college. How we mature as thinkers and doers changes the game, but it’s a good thing.

[32:15] - In many careers, when you’re new, you’re fueled by the curiosity and passion of doing the process. After you’ve explored the easy wins, there’s a deeper level of mastery to achieve. There’s always going to be the edge of what’s familiar and what’s unfamiliar.

[34:12] - When what we are doing becomes an ongoing excuse, rather than something that fulfills you, it may be an indicator that we have arrived at an edge. In these instances, we must shift forward and look at things in a different way to see how we can expand on it or beyond it. This is when we have to pursue questions to find out what we haven’t yet discovered. This is our “fit sense.”

[36:52] - There are also “depth check” questions we can ask ourselves - are we looking at it too deep or too shallow, or is there somewhere in between that we need to be exploring? There is such a range of questions you can ask, because at the end of the day, it’s about an inquiry mindset that keeps asking.

[39:45] - We can get into a rut where we ask questions that are too deep, based on wrong signals.

[42:00] - In our fields, when we switch mediums or presentation styles we might feel like it’s super hard. On one hand, we crave doing something novel, but on the other hand, we fear not being good at something. However, it’s okay to find out you’re not good at something. We start to think of our total way of doing as our certainty anchor, rather than a few important things to latch on to. All of us get caught in these places where we think we’re being open-minded, when what we really need to do is go a little bit further and be open in a broader sense so we’re not anchored down in a negative way.

[46:33] - The 3 Growth-Oriented Ways to Explore Your Creative Edge: 1) Choice: In everything we do, there is a choice - even within your pre-existing patterns. There is power in this choice. 2) Reaction: When we get results back from making our choice, how do we react to it and why? 3) Improvisation: When we get to the edge, we’re going to have to change the way we do things in some way. If we remember that we have the choice, and that we can consciously react rather than having a knee-jerk reaction, and realize that we will have to improvise, we actually make ourselves more powerful as we move toward new things.

[49:40] - Not choosing is itself a choice. We have a tendency to think that anything different than the status quo is a choice we have to make. But maintaining the status quo is also a choice. We can choose to remain on the comfortable side of control, or we can choose to do something different. Compare the positives and negatives of each choice to the other. When we learn to do that, we see that we’re always at an edge.

[52:45] - These three growth-oriented ways serve as capstone to the whole process of approaching the edge. It is continuous - there is always a new beginning but it’s all part of a cycle. No matter the rewards, it will always involve choice, reaction, and improvisation. Charlie and Larry talk about approaching these choices with a mindset of playfulness.

[57:32] - Larry’s challenge for listeners this week is called: Change the Question! Instead of saying “why?,” say “what?” or “how?” Think about a question that you’re faced with at work or as you move toward an edge - change that question to use a different prompt and see how it gets you thinking differently.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Books by Larry Robertson

Productive Flourishing Podcast Episode 131: Questioning the Givens of Creativity with Larry Robertson

3 Growth-Oriented Ways to Explore Your Creative Edge, by Larry Robertson on Productive Flourishing

Uncertainty, by Jonathan Fields

Stop Lying and Start Creating, by Charlie Gilkey on Productive Flourishing

World Peace and Other 4th-Grade Achievements, by John Hunter

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In this episode, Angela joins Charlie to discuss how they are balancing service work and volunteerism within their personal and professional lives. Both Charlie and Angela have taken on new commitments with various organizations, and they’ve been examining how much time they’re giving to service and volunteerism, as well as making some important decisions about what those boundaries look like.

Key Takeaways:

[1:38] - Charlie and Angela talk about the new commitments they’ve taken on - in many cases within organizations they had already been previously involved in. Their boundaries for what they can take on are being tested as these new commitments displace other things. They have had many conversations about how much time they’re giving to service and volunteerism, as well as taking a hard look at those boundaries.

[4:18] - At the Wayfinding Academy, they are flipping the college experience on its head - it starts by focusing on students first and who they want to be in the world, and helping them cultivate themselves and their next steps needed to be that person. Charlie has recently become the board Chairman within this organization. His work with Social Ventures Partners, where he is also on the board, focuses on bridging the gap in Pre-K education for minority populations.

[6:45] - Angela has also taken on a new role within the Wayfinding Academy, as Chairperson of the Wisdom Council (Charlie’s old position). In addition to this work, she is involved with the board of a women’s spiritual community in Portland, serving as the right-hand person for the spiritual leaders of that community. This commitment is twofold; in addition to the administrative commitment, there is also a spiritual commitment.

[9:15] - Angela talks about why they are involved in these acts of volunteerism. In addition to it just being part of who they are and what they do, there is a big focus at Productive Flourishing on community integration. It’s a great quality to have to jump all in with the things you’re involved in, but sometimes you may get into a situation where you jump in too fast. Charlie and Angela keep this under control by checking in with each other on boundaries and making sure these commitments are aligned with the work they want to do in the world, while continuing to take care of themselves.

[12:43] - Charlie talks about value (both economic and otherwise) and how that can guide our decisions about what we’re involved in and continue to do. He also talks about Proactive Activism: a strong civic involvement to help bridge the gap between the public and private spheres. Instead of just preaching, they get involved because they want to model the message as well as sharing it. For them, a big focus is education, as it is a pathway to equality.

[15:55] - Finding institutions that advance your political or social priorities is really important. Charlie and Angela talk about the personal reasons they have for choosing their particular organizations to be involved in, and what it means for them to be involved in those organizations now.

[21:50] - Charlie talks about their involvement on the boards of their organizations - both Charlie and Angela don’t like to be passive in an organization, and being on the board allows them to be in a high-leverage scenario to make the the most impact. These positions also fit their specific skill sets. Additionally, they both prefer greater involvement in a few organizations rather than spreading themselves too thin across several organizations.

[25:55] - Integrating volunteerism and service into business: How do these organizations further Charlie’s professional and personal development? For Charlie, these organizations are a natural outgrowth of the people he’s involved with in the community and embody who he is as a person. It has been challenging to incorporate the results of his involvement professionally, because the leadership is more committee-based rather than the type of leadership he would use for a small business. Although it has challenged him, it’s been a good learning period.

[28:53] - Your business can’t fuel all parts of you - volunteerism and service provide another context for leadership and taking on big goals.

[31:25] - In addition, having these extra involvements has made Charlie more intentional with his business work with Productive Flourishing. It has also made him more intentional about spending his extra time to further Wayfinding Academy and Social Venture Partners (SVP), rather than killing time on Facebook or something that is not as fulfilling. Charlie has experienced a lot of personal growth.

[36:00] - Angela shares her experience of how volunteerism and service have influenced her personal and professional growth. She feels that her leadership skills have been tested and challenged, and have gotten better in the past few years. She has also gotten more comfortable speaking up and using her voice to make her perspective clear. Being able to use her past experiences in her new contexts has allowed her to better show up with her work with Productive Flourishing. Her work with Productive Flourishing, Fourteenth Moon, and Wayfinding Academy seem to feed each other.

[39:11] - In Angela’s work, she has been challenged by engaging in and facilitating hard questions and conversations. It has been an interesting development for Angela, but she’s been able to take the ability to facilitate tough conversations in her personal life into other areas, like Productive Flourishing and her council and board work. This is an excellent example of the benefits of being involved in civic organizations; they can help you develop skills you may not have otherwise developed. In addition, it gives you an additional avenue to cultivate and practice these skills.

[44:10] - Being involved in outside organizations also allows you to keep your growing pains and strife outside of your personal relationships. Keeping those aspects in outside organizations that are in service to your community is a good way to build synergy and a good life where you are able to grow and develop in service to other people.

[45:17] - There can be some downsides. Investing your emotional energy into external or volunteer organizations can decrease it in other areas. It is important to find a balance and make sure you have ways to “fill your cup” as it becomes depleted. Angela and Charlie both speak to the fact that working through these challenges themselves has allowed them to help other people with them as well.

[49:44] - Charlie describes the effects of their involvement in these organizations as catalytic, both in business and in personal life. It has allowed for new growth and awareness. We don’t always realize what we can do and who we are in a lot of ways until we have the external situations that reflect those things back to us and give us a mission, trial, or opportunity to play out what we can do.

[50:55] - If you’re looking for ways to thrive and flourish in the world, find places to volunteer or be of service in your local community, and align those things with the ways that you want to grow.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Wayfinding Academy

Social Venture Partners

Women of the Fourteenth Moon

Democracy on Trial, by Jean Bethke Elshtain

Bowling Alone, by Robert Putnam

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Patricia Bravo runs “Bravo for You,” a consultancy that accelerates leader capability through the use of empathetic leadership. She joins the show today to discuss empathy and leadership, and to share why it can be so hard to weave empathy and leadership together, even though it seems they should be natural partners.

Key Takeaways:

[2:10] - Even though it seems like empathy and leadership should walk hand in hand, the reality is that in many situations you can have leadership models that aren’t very empathetic, or empathetic habits that don’t display good leadership.

[2:57] - In Patricia’s work, she helps to teach leaders in the workplace about empathetic leadership. Some common questions she gets are “How can you show up as an empathetic leader while managing performance?” or “How can you juggle making important business decisions and being empathetic?”

[4:15] - Many leaders are struggling with the work environments they are in - volatile, uncertain, complex, and ambiguous (VUCA). Many leaders are commended for their performance and delivery within a business context, but not so often for the context and quality of their leadership. Despite this, leaders who invest in empathetic leadership are able to achieve more productivity through motivation and the results they get from their team members.

[6:52] - In some cases, there may be a little hard-headedness about adopting empathetic leadership, but in other cases leaders are just struggling with how to be more empathetic, rather than a rejection of the idea. Patricia had begun to notice that there is a hunger for empathy in the workplace, especially from team members for their leaders.

[9:25] - The definition of empathy that Patricia uses for leaders is from Daniel Goleman: The ability to understand the emotional makeup of others, and the skill in then treating people according to their emotional reactions. They also discuss what empathy is not; it is different from sympathy and compassion. Patricia talks about what these things are, as well as how they relate to and intertwine with empathy.

[11:58] - How can leaders balance empathy with ensuring they’re treating everybody the same? One of the benefits of empathetic leadership is that you can customize to an individual team member’s preference. As a result, the team member is more likely to continue to want to connect with their leader - it helps to establish a sense of trust.

[14:03] - Charlie talks about some of the tension that still remains. Middle managers often desire empathy the most, but at the same time struggle with executing it because of the pressure they receive from so many sides.

[17:18] - Some leaders find the speed of business today to be quite challenging. It is important to have some quick wins to demonstrate your success as a leader. One of the things Patricia suggests is for leaders to spend time early in the development of relationships with their team members learning about preferences and how they can meet team members where they’re at.

[18:29] - In her empathetic leader model, she encourages leaders to really try to relate with the individuals they are trying to connect with. The first thing you should do with a team is actually work out the empathetic stuff.

[21:21] - What are the first things leaders should do when they take over a leadership position? What would the first steps be in fostering empathetic leadership? The first thing Patricia advises is to try and do a quick assessment of what level of empathy their teams deserves. The second thing to think about is to what degree you are engaging your own emotions.

[23:44] - One of the first things you can do as new leader, is show up in an empathetic manner for your team members and demonstrate your interest in understanding their perspective. A meeting with your team to share your approach is helpful before you continue on to one-on-one meetings. If there is a situation that is more chaotic, it may be beneficial to first meet with individuals before you meet collectively as a team.

[29:05] - Part of what you’re trying to do in this stage is figure out the culture and values of your team. This can help you get to the unstated cultural norms that could get in the way of you being an empathetic leader. As you listen, you can look at nonverbal cues and the emotions behind what’s being stated.

[32:48] - Patricia talks about how she got involved in the work of empathetic leadership. Looking through all of her experiences, she noticed that leaders who led with empathy differentiated themselves at work because they got different results from people. They were able to increase their followership. There was not a lot of research on empathy in the workplace, so she began compiling these findings into her work. Her earliest experiences around empathy came from her grandmother, and have now translated into some of the work she does.

[36:04] - Empathy and compassion seem to have a gendered component to them. The research shows that women have a natural tendency toward empathy, but Patricia likes to focus on the fact that empathy is gender agnostic. So despite our natural tendencies, we all have the ability to develop and enhance our empathetic leadership. One of the things she does to engage with this is to just have a conversation about people’s experiences and what their objections are.

[39:07] - Many people may struggle with finding a balance between displaying a healthy amount of empathy and coming across as too “soft.” Patricia encourages people to experiment within the context of their environment to find a balance, and then practice with some regularity. In any case, just try it and see what results you get.

[41:34] - How can we create an organizational habit of empathetic leadership? One of the things about empathetic leadership is that it stands the test of time, because of that emotional connection. A good way to maintain empathetic leadership in your work environment is by partnering with one or two other people to stay connected on the topic.

[44:10] - Charlie and Patricia talk about how to implement empathetic leadership throughout the hierarchy in the workplace. As someone who is new to the workplace and not necessarily in a leadership position, you can engage in self-study and create a small community to talk about the idea of empathy (see below for Patricia’s book recommendations). At the middle management layer, it’s about finding moments to figure out where you can invest. Think about incorporating empathy into existing parts of your day. At the senior level, Patricia encourages first testing on some keyholders in the organization to hopefully gather support and help advocate for bringing it to the whole organization. They often have the most resources with which to experiment and can decide the most appropriate way to incorporate it.

[52:34] - There is a personal responsibility here to help implement empathetic leadership in your organization.

[54:06] - Patricia’s invitation/ challenge for listeners: She is really interested in hearing the stories that people have around empathy. She would love to hear your stories - contact her via her website Bravo For You. Her challenge is for you to try and lead with empathy in a different way than you have in the past, or try to incorporate it into your work if it’s new for you.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Bravo for You

Can You Grow into Level 5 Leadership?, by Jim Collins

Emotional Intelligence, by Daniel Goleman

The Speed of Trust, by Stephen M.R. Covey

Co-Active Coaching, by Laura Whitworth

The Coaching Habit, by Michael Bungay Stanier

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Patricia’s and Charlie’s Recommendations:

Brené Brown

Wired to Care, by Dev Patnaik

Patricia’s Research

TouchPoints, by Douglas Conant and Mette Norgaard

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In today’s episode, New York Times Best-Selling author of eight books and creator of the Open Heart Project Susan Piver, joins Charlie to talk about the links between mindfulness and creativity. During the discussion, both Charlie and Susan share some of what they’ve learned in their own practices that help them go back in when they get distracted, lost, or afraid.

Key Takeaways:

[2:57] - In her previous appearances on the show, Charlie and Susan talked about how meditation is not just about what happens while you’re meditating, but what it powers after you meditate. Meditation can help you become more creative and productive. In both meditation and creative work, you do two things simultaneously: we use our minds in a very precise way, but there’s also a sense of expanded awareness. In these instances, the thinking becomes one-pointed and spacious at the same time.

[7:27] - Both meditation and the creative process are open to distractions (whether that be losing the breath or losing a creative thread), which which may require the art of “going back in” to continue creating or meditating. There is a weird duality in both where you’re focused on one aspect, but you become aware of so much more.

[10:02] - Charlie and Susan talk about mindfulness and the choice that happens when you’re presented with a distraction, fear, or emotion. Many people may have the impression that those distractions, fears, and emotions go away, but more often than not it is a choice to return from those things and get back into the creative space. The same methods of returning don’t work for everyone, and that’s okay.

[14:55] - One of the consequences of meditation is that you’re able to access deeper parts of yourself - parts that you don’t think about on a conscious basis or pieces of yourself that only show up sometimes. Susan has found a lack of division between what’s hidden and what’s not hidden; it seems like one ongoing process. To her, the creation of the environment for those things to arise is what really matters, more than the choices she makes in the way she relates to herself.

[17:22] - Referring to a principle from Buddhism, Susan discusses the container principle, which states that the environment in which something occurs is inseparable from the something that occurs. This can be important for finding an environment that will allow creative flourishing. She has found it really useful to create a world where she feels well. In these instances, the environment becomes a source of spiritual nourishment and a source of confidence.

[20:07] - Charlie talks about the importance of finding a conducive space for creative work, and how this translates into being mindful throughout the day of the environments, relationships, and stories that you’re creating for yourself. This mindfulness helps us to be good at being ourselves.

[26:08] - One of the major links between meditation and the creative process is the sense of being in a place where you’re “falling” but there is no ground - you may be trying to harness your words for a post, or energy during meditation, but there is no way you can contain it all. You are surrounded by all these possibilities that may be hard to focus into one point. The human condition is full of these paradoxes.

[32:15] - One of the best things we can do for ourselves as creatives is just get started. As we become more practiced in turning away from distractions, it gets easier to start. While it’s important to plan and draw influence, the real magic comes from joining in.

[39:30] - A new practice Charlie has started is calling himself out on what tools and equipment are necessary to meditate or create. Don’t let a lack of resources be an excuse not to do or create something.

[46:16] - In cases where you don’t have the right tools, you have two options. You can either find or create a tool that will help you, or you can fight through those distractions and make it work.

[48:50] - The important thread of today’s episode is that the skills and practices learned from mindfulness and meditation can help you be more prolific, creative, and productive. In the same way, the skills used in productivity and creativity will likely help you be more mindful and more present in the world.

[51:03] - Susan leaves us the following challenge/ invitation: Relax. Do you remember how to relax? If so, please do it more; if not, please reconnect.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Open Heart Project

Susan Piver

Productive Flourishing Podcast Episode 4: Become More Mindful with Susan Piver

Productive Flourishing Podcast Episode 54: Demystifying Meditation with Susan Piver

3 Growth Oriented Ways to Explore Your Creative Edge, by Larry Robertson on Productive Flourishing

The War of Art, by Steven Pressfield

Byword

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Meighan is a digital strategist who previously ran My Love For You, and was recruited by Yahoo! to work as a social media strategist. On today’s episode, she shares some of what she’s learned during her years in the digital trenches of creative work. Meighan and Charlie cover topics like the role of her community in her online work, the importance of starting and continuing to make things online, and working through the fear that comes along with creative stuff with and for other people.

Key Takeaways:

[2:50] - During her online career, Meighan’s moved back and forth between San Francisco and Boston a couple of times. She had built up an online community in San Francisco, and found that the community was hard to replace or sustain in Boston. While she has found some online communities and made connections in Boston, she has found that it has had a negative impact to not have a local community to engage with and recharge.

[6:20] - Many introverts have a powerful group of people, usually local, that they’re connecting with that’s feeding them. One of the things introverts tend to pull together and transmute is the social energy around them, but the group from which introverts draw this social energy is usually pretty selective.

[9:00] - While Meighan’s family is very supportive, it can be hard to explain her work to people who aren’t connected. It is important to find a community of peers and colleagues that can help to foster creative work online.

[13:47] - Online businesses (and really every business) will likely face an internal disruption and an external disruption every 18 months. There’s a content wheel that is always spinning, and when you enter those creative spaces, you have to think about where you are now, and where you’ll be in a year. Things are constantly changing based on what people want.

[19:09] - Meighan is always coming back to her “Why” to keep her moving forward in her business. It is important to pay attention to why you do what you do, rather than getting caught up in vanity metrics.

[21:04] - Meighan talks about how she began her journey with online creative work. She originally ran an online art blog. She talks about the change in how easy it was to turn her idea into something that people would want to consume. Thinking back to those times when she first started helps Meighan to move forward in creative stuff and doing new things in her current business. Even though there may be a lot out there now, it is never too late to get started!

[28:48] - When you’re first creating something new, you have to start so you can get in front of people and see what works. At the very start, you’re in one of the best places because nobody is paying attention yet. When you finally put it online, it takes on a life of its own.

[32:43] - Meighan and Charlie talk about failure. One of the things Meighan has learned is that as a business owner, you constantly have to have different ideas, and not all of those ideas are going to make it. You can’t let little setbacks keep you from moving forward. Even if an idea might not work, it’s still important to do it anyway.

[36:35] - As creative people, you never get to a point where you’ve made it; you’re only continually making it. At a certain point, the good stuff rises to the top and you get good about showing the good stuff. Meighan suggests there’s a balance between arrogance and humility when it comes to our expectations about our work.

[40:00] - Charlie and Meighan talk about steps taken to learn new things in order to grow. In the beginning, learning new things for yourself is really fun. But there may come a time when it’s worth it to invest some money or switch programs to reach your goals quicker.

[43:55] - Meighan talks about doing a lot of coaching around fear, and her own experience with fear. She talks about how this influences her work and how it ties into her connection to her community.

[48:18] - Being authentic and being open are two different things. Strive to be your authentic self and tell the stories that will enhance the connections you make with people.

[49:55] - Meighan’s challenge: Create what you’ve been putting off. Forget about the beautiful website or the right name; just start.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Quiet, by Susan Cain

The Small Business Life Cycle, by Charlie Gilkey

Tara Gentile

My Love For You.

Meighan O’Toole

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In this episode, Angela joins Charlie to talk about tipping points in your career or business that require you to change something. These tipping points could be changing in family arrangements, burn out, or a number of different things. They look at these periods of time when you’re going through something and you can’t do “business as usual,” how to recognize those times, and what to do to deal with them.

Key Takeaways:

[3:50] - With summertime rolling in, for people who may be more naturally energetic in the earlier parts of the year, the changing of the season can create different tensions as you start to slow down. While it’s important to listen to these signals, they may not always coincide with your business demands.

[6:27] - Whether you’re burnt out, “well done,” or you see it coming, these are all things to be paying attention to. This may also be a good time to invite some reflection into your life.

[8:27] - While these situations may look different for different people, they are all situations where we need to be internally more aware. No matter what your work situation is, it’s important to be able to tune in to where your energy is at and what is going on in your personal and work life.

[11:00] - Many of our creative listeners are constantly pushing and driving. One of the life lessons to learn is to moderate the driving, or lean into the driving in certain ways. It can be easy to localize what we’re going through, but there seems to always be something else that needs to be done. Zoom out - don’t look at just what you have to do this week or this month. Look for patterns to make sure you’re not overworking yourself.

[17:32] - One thing that happens for Charlie when he gets in these situations is that it takes him a lot of effort to engage with projects he usually enjoys (and also that need to get done). For example, writing is usually cathartic, but that’s one of the things he has trouble with when he’s getting close to well-done. When he notices this, he is able to ease up slowly to avoid reaching the burn out stage.

[23:17] - For Angela, there are a few things that start to happen. She can usually tell when she’s getting closer to burn out by the fact that her mood is more easily upset, and she tends to focus on things that aren’t very helpful.

[26:55] - Both Charlie and Angela pay attention to their behaviors as an indicator of their emotional state. All of us have different ways in which the toll of stressors show up for us. You may have to ask yourself “what am I doing that’s uncharacteristic of me?” or “what’s different and what could be causing it?”

[30:35] - Some reasons for these feelings creeping up could be changes in your external world, rather than you, or your work. Any of these things can increase emotional and cognitive pressure. Sometimes it’s hard to acknowledge how they’re affecting us.

[33:28] - Business and life are always connected. We have to acknowledge when work bleeds into our lives outside work.

[35:02] - What do we do when we notice ourselves in these situations? Charlie advocates for self-compassion - when you notice you’re going through something, the first response should not be to just soldier on. Before you jump right into fixing, acknowledge that something’s going on and take it seriously.

[37:08] - Whenever you know that something major is happening in your world, stop and think about how it affects you and what you had planned to do. Think about how it may requiring you to shift around the things you need to do.

[38:33] - Finally, try not to make a really drastic change, because this seems to make things considerably worse. Go through the process of who might be able to help you lighten your load or share responsibilities. If the load becomes too heavy to bear for you, find people and other sources to help distribute that load.

[42:36] - As he wraps this episode up, Charlie encourages you to think about where you are as far as the total load that you carry in your life, and seeing where you are on the spectrum on the way to well-done. Be compassionate with yourself about what you discover. No matter where you are, be thinking about what personal resources or practices you have that you can go to if you are getting too close to burnt-out. Building this team before you need it can help you avoid crashing and burning.

[46:22] - There are many people out there dealing with a similar feeling or situation, and Angela hopes that you will take some time to reflect on anything that has resonated with you in this episode, and pay attention to that.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Falling Upward, by Richard Rohr

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Today’s guest is Bryce Bladon, author of Hell to Pay 2: Everything a Freelancer Needs to Earn Good Money, and editor-in-chief of Clients From Hell. He joins Charlie to discuss the differences between being an entrepreneur and a freelancer. So many creative professionals get stuck and confused because they are unsure about what type of business they’re building, and why they’re choosing that kind of business.

Key Takeaways:

[2:02] - Bryce thinks that freelancing is going to be the way of creative professionals in the future. Based on surveys conducted by the Freelancers Union, it is predicted that more than 40% of the US workforce is freelancing in some capacity. While it may take different forms, freelancing essentially means personal self-employment.

[3:23] - Is there a difference between an entrepreneur and a freelancer? A freelancer is typically selling skills or services in their one-person (for the most part) business, while an entrepreneur is usually trying to start a business that will grow and scale, and may possibly be interested in selling it. Historically, freelancing is the way most creatives were employed.

[6:01] - Now, we are seeing more of a renaissance of freelancing (and entrepreneurship), as some aspects of today’s workplace make it hard to employ really specialized talent. Advances in technology and changes in mindset have also given rise to many tools and platforms that are empowering for creators.

[9:25] - The defining difference for Bryce between an entrepreneur and a freelancer is how each business scales. While there is overlap - maybe the entrepreneurial spirit is in a freelancer, or the meaningful, personal touch may be there as an entrepreneur builds his business - the difference lies in what your ultimate goals are and how you see yourself doing this three or five years down the road.

[13:40] - Another big difference is that entrepreneurs typically take more financial risks, acquiring investors and hoping to gain profit. For a lot of freelance businesses, they are able to work on a smaller scale and get paid for the work they produce. Bryce talks about some of the lifestyle and work style differences between the two.

[15:43] - Charlie talks about how the nature of entrepreneurs and freelancers has changed, and how perhaps our definitions need to expand to include more types of businesses. There is some grey space between the two extremes of entrepreneurs and freelancers, where the term solo-preneur seems appropriate.

[20:05] - Labels aside, it all comes back to what you’re trying to do. There are different trajectories based on what your goals are. Once you determine what you’re trying to achieve, you can figure out what business models are going to work best for you.

[21:28] - There are some skills that a freelancer should have: some amount of marketing, business, and accounting skills would be helpful to help them promote and manage their services. These skills are arguably more important for entrepreneurs because they are usually trying to build a big business, and need a solid foundation to keep building up.

[24:08] - As you creative people think about your pathway forward, one way of thinking about it is specialist versus generalist. An entrepreneur needs to be a better generalist that thinks about several things at the same time. A freelancer will need to be a better specialist, that hones their skill to be better than whatever is out there.

[28:30] - Another big difference is that almost anyone can freelance in some capacity, but not everyone can become an entrepreneur, at least at the start. There needs to be an appreciation of the risks you’re going to be taking before you take them.

[30:00] - Many businesses start by selling a service, and this can sometimes morph into selling a product. Starting with selling a craft or a skill is something that most people can do. Building products around that requires a different skill set with a different mentality around it.

[36:24] - No matter where you are on the spectrum (entrepreneur, freelancer, solo-preneuer), most people’s first business either fails or is not the business that ends up being sustainable in the long-term. Where you start is very rarely going to be anywhere close to where you will be when that business matures.

[37:57] - The scale of risk that you might take when starting a freelance or service-based business is much lower than making a product and all that that encompasses.

[41:11] - Charlie and Bryce talk about how startup companies differ from many of the other freelance/entrepreneurial companies out there. It is not logical for all businesses to grow tenfold. You have to think about what makes sense for the individual business in terms of what you hope to accomplish. You need to be able to answer the question, am I building a business that I will want to be in in five years?

[43:16] - Many people get into the freelance business for personal growth reasons. Though they may not be more financially independent, they are enjoying a higher quality of life. The real payout for Bryce is the idea of independence, and what you can do with it, and how you spend your time with regards to the business.

[46:43] - The market and opportunities for freelancing are only getting better these days, and that’s a very exciting thing. Freelancing is a great vehicle for autonomy, mastery, and purpose. In some of the smaller companies that are emerging, you get an opportunity to have the freedom of creativity with the security of getting a paycheck. When you drop the six-figure expectation, you can find a balance of work that works for you, your clients, and your life and relationships at the same time.

[49:03] - Bryce’s challenge for listeners: Find and reach out to somebody who is doing something that inspires you or that you would like to do someday. Say something nice about what they’ve done and what it has done for you.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Bryce Bladon

Clients from Hell

Drive, by Dan Pink

Hell to Pay 2, by Bryce Bladon

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In today’s episode, Cory Huff joins Charlie to discuss how to think through whether to start a new business, to jump to another project, or to not grow your business as you consider dimensions of your life that you’d like to advance. Cory’s advice comes after a year of deciding to scale his business and the trials he learned from along the way.

Key Takeaways:

[4:11] - Both Cory and Charlie are “accidental entrepreneurs,” but they both ended up running successful businesses - and are thinking of ideas for more! The daily journey is understanding which of the ideas you have are congruent with your business, and which of those are worth pursuing.

[6:12] - This conversation grew out of the fact that Cory has deemed 2017 his “pivot year.” As he has been trying to grow his current business (The Abundant Artist), and not seeing the results he expected, he began to wonder if this business was one that was meant to scale. If not, what happens next? He has been doing a lot of experimenting, both within and outside the fine arts field, where his current business resides - as well as starting some personal projects.

[11:38] - Charlie talks about some of the motivation for starting a business, and how we measure our happiness and success. In many cases, especially for entrepreneurial businesses, the key metric becomes joy and happiness rather than large numbers and money. Evaluating these different factors can help determine where your focus should be for your business to achieve the things you want.

[16:13] - Cory takes us back to 2016 when the goal for his business was scaling. His reason for wanting to scale was mostly to figure out how to reach more artists and help them quit their day jobs to focus on their art. He tried different things like putting on a big conference, and putting together a marketing agency for artists. While these things didn’t work out, he used them as learning opportunities, and has kept his goal to reach more artists as he pursues different ventures.

[19:54] - When deciding whether to pivot and stay within your own business or do something completely different, it’s important to think about how ready the marketplace is for a new type of business. It is important to engage with your customers and potential client-base to be able to create what they want. Cory talks about his experience with this and why some of his previous pursuits didn’t take off.

[24:45] - The Abundant Artist has reached its local max. While there is still some opportunity for growth, Cory doesn’t feel like he could really improve the product enough to grow 10x.Cory talks about some of the different things they tried and how he determined it might be time to do something different. If your reach ambitions have reached a certain plateau, it might be time to question if it’s a market problem.

[31:31] - Charlie talks about the possibility of moving some of the Productive Flourishing resources into an app. He talks about some of the specific struggles he would face in doing this, and weighing these pros and cons to determine if developing an app is something he would want to take on.

[38:12] - As you’re looking at different things to move forward - whether that is adding an element to your business or starting another business - the first thing to think about is whether you really want to win that game. You have to consider what other things you might have to sacrifice to make it possible. If it is not something you really want, it may not be best to pursue that particular venture.

[41:55] - Cory talks about some of the different opportunities that have popped up for him during this time of figuring out his next step. He’s struggled with this a little bit because he didn’t want to tell people he was thinking about projects outside of The Abundant Artist or have his clients think he wasn’t still serious about that project.

[43:35] - It seems to be that our public life is our life, where what people see is what we’re doing. But there are things that we are doing in our private lives that may not make sense in a public narrative, but make sense for our personal lives. Charlie discusses his personal experience with this dichotomy.

[46:35] - When you’re thinking about new business opportunities, try to avoid the “either/or” scenario and try to make it an “and” scenario. This can help to balance not only the work for your different projects, but also the outcomes of those projects. If you take an “and” model, you want to adjust your expectations to match the effort delusion.

[49:08] - Another thing that Cory has been thinking about is not only what he should do and how, but who he should do it with. He’s been a solo business owner for a while now (bar his work with a publisher for his book) and he’s been trying to open himself up to the idea of partnering with people to collaborate on projects. Partnership and collaboration requires giving up a bit of control and freedom, but could be a really good thing as well.

[57:00] - If you’re normally in a collaborative environment, it can be good to have solo side projects, or vice versa. These opportunities may allow you be in a different leadership mode or tap into a different skill set. Perhaps, starting a new project would give you the chance to cultivate and master different parts of yourself that your current business won’t let you.

[59:05] - Cory leaves us with these two things: 1) If you are a visual artist and you are looking for help with marketing your stuff, reach out to Cory at theabundantartist.com and 2) He is open to collaborations right now, so if you have anything you’re looking to jumpstart - let him know!

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

The Abundant Artist

How to Sell Your Art Online, by Cory Huff

Pivot, by Jenny Blake

Ryan Levesque’s Ask Methodology

Contact Cory: cory@theabundantartist.com

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In today’s episode, Fiona Dawson and Charlie talk about fluid identities in sexuality, the role that the US military plays in social change, and what happens on the other side of success. Fiona is the director of the New York Times short-opinion documentary “Transgender, at War and in Love.” Her other projects elevate stories about transgender people in the military and she has been recognized for her work with the LGBT community.

Key Takeaways:

[2:15] - Charlie and Fiona introduce the context of her work, the inspiration for her projects, and her background. Her goal with her media is to make topics that may seem dry or boring, entertaining and engaging.

[3:56] - She moved from the United Kingdom to the United States when she met her ex-husband while she was volunteering in Bangladesh. This is part of where her exposure to the US military began, and thus the start of many of her projects.

[5:30] - In 2012, Fiona came out as bisexual when she had previously identified as lesbian. Charlie and Fiona talk about how there are still some underserved communities within the LGBTQ+ community - it seems to be predominantly lesbian or gay. Fiona attributes some of this to the binary model present in society. Even though there have been advances, there is still some bi-phobia and bi-stigma.

[7:53] - Fiona shares her story of self-discovery, and how her experiences have helped to shape her views on the spectrum. She defines bisexual as having the capacity to be attracted to someone who is similar to her, or different from her, which really expands the whole concept of gender.

[9:50] - In a video, Fiona expressed ideas of ethics and normativity of identifying as bisexual after previously identifying as something else. After conversations with others, Fiona wanted to bring some stereotypes to light and show that they are not true. Statistics show that bisexual people actually face higher rates of violence, have poorer health care, and are more discriminated in the community, despite making up nearly 52% of the LGBTQ+ community. Only in the last year or so has she seen LGBTQ organizations trying to make amends for this.

[15:35] - Charlie talks about how many of these issues present for bisexual people (the binary constriction) may extend and can be applied to other areas of life such as race. So much of the confusion rests with “either/or” thinking rather than “both/and.”

[17:30] - Fiona talks about fluidity in gender identity and sexuality. From her personal experience and the experience of those around her, many people come out at different stages in their life. She talks specifically about people who come out at a later age in life, rather than as a young person. She also talks about gender fluidity and some different expressions of this, and how they can be limited by binary thinking rather than a spectrum.

[20:50] - There’s a certain part of our make-up where these labels that we have make it easier for us to associate in the world at the base level. On one hand, this is how our world is comprehensible and navigable for us. Where we have to be careful is if we use these labels in conscious and unconscious ways to limit people’s abilities to be connected within their communities.

[24:35] - These stigmas, privileged or not, can create a preconceived image that we feel like we have to live up to, whether it’s true to ourselves or not. Being able to break down the binary way that we are seeing people present themselves can maybe help us become more empathetic and respectful.

[28:30] - Fiona and Charlie discuss these ideas as it applies to the workplace, and how to involve more people in your diversity initiatives.

[29:11] - Fiona shares her inspiration for her work with TransMilitary. She feels that exploring the stories of people in the military, one of the most gender binary workplaces, can help us to understand and move forward in helping people rethink the binary definition of gender.

[31:13] - In Charlie’s leadership role, one of the biggest challenges was seeing the way future leaders were groomed, and how unintentionally exclusive it was towards women. Charlie lends his experience on how he’s seen gender roles play out in the military, and how changes here can be one of the greatest vehicles for social change.

[35:45] - This is precisely why Fiona chose to pursue her efforts with transgender people in the military. In 2004, when she came out as gay, she was working to repeal Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell. After it was repealed in 2011, she didn’t realize that there was still a ban against transgender people, due to outdated policies and procedures still written into the department of defense regulations. While trans people were serving effectively, they were fighting for freedoms they weren’t being granted themselves.

[39:49] - Around 2011-2012, Fiona came to understand this and got together with some of her friends to create a media project to help elevate their stories to raise awareness. In the beginning of 2015, the New York Times picked up her project and she teamed up with Side by Side Studios and that’s where Transgender, at War and in Love, came about. Three things came together - the advocacy and storytelling, research being done by the Palm Center, and the media storm - and the ban was lifted on June 30, 2016.

[43:00] - Charlie talks about the remaining discourse between rights at a state level and a federal level. There is still a striking difference between those who are fighting for freedoms of people they don’t know, while still being denied those in their own communities.

[45:21] - Fiona has been nominated for an Emmy for her work with TransMilitary. If she could do anything, she would host a TV show where she shares positive ways people are fighting to end stigma. While this didn’t come to fruition, she used this to inspire the way she lives her life on this Earth right now to continue making a difference, hence her work (and success!) with TransMilitary.

[48:45] - Fiona talks about the struggle of reaching success. Despite all that we achieve, it can still be hard to feel like we’ve achieved success. Fiona finds solace in appreciating the daily moments and the hidden experiences that make us all successful every single day. Of course, she has achieved some pretty great things with her team to change the United States military.

[51:41] - Charlie talks about what happens after we achieve great success - sometimes we can lose our drive or the thing we were chasing that shaped our whole world. In the wake of Fiona’s current success, she began to feel like she didn’t have a place anymore, and there have been other happenings in the world that have affected her outlook. But today, she is inspired by her continued work on her collaborative feature film, and uses the stories as inspiration for change. She hopes that her project will allow her to have honest conversations with people about their worldview in the hopes of bringing about awareness and understanding.

[1:00:38] - The final message Fiona would like to leave with our listeners is this: “If you know what makes you feel alive, go do it.”

Mentioned in This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Fiona Dawson

Transgender, at War and in Love, by Fiona Dawson

TransMilitary

Movement Advancement Project

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In this last episode of the Creative Giant Show, we discuss why we’re ending it and what comes next.

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This episode is a requested reading of a previous post on Productive Flourishing named “12 Simple Ways to Be Present.” This post shares twelve simple ways to be more present in your day-to-day life, and to take a pause when life wants to push you headlong.

Key Takeaways:

[0:53] - Learning to be present helps us refrain from thinking about what we could’ve or should’ve done, and worrying about the uncertainties of the future. Charlie explores twelve ways to be present, ordered from things that you can do pretty easily, to items further down the list that take a little more effort.

[1:55] - Look for ways that you can stack these tips to get the most out of your time being present.

[2:16] - 1. Drink water: Drinking water works because it makes sure your emotional state is not a reflection of your being dehydrated, it makes you slow down and breathe, and it gets you to take a break from your external situation.

[3:15] - 2. Breathe deeply: Charlie shares a breathing technique called “combat breathing” that has you breathe in while counting to zero, hold for four counts, and breathe out for four counts. He gives suggestions on how you can incorporate this into your daily life.

[4:06] - 3. Wiggle your toes: Charlie shares some different ways to move your toes that can help you remain present. Find whatever feels right for you while actively moving your toes. Toe wiggling also reminds Charlie of the love, presence, support, gratitude, and forgiveness available to him when he’s present.

[5:38] - 4. Stretch: A stiff, constricted body leads to anxiety - we can use our bodies to create moods. Stretching can help break a cycle of tension and anxiety, as well as incorporate breathing deeply.

[6:35] - 5. Take a meditation moment: Despite common belief, meditation does not have to require a lot of time to do, and doesn’t necessarily have to be done a certain way. Charlie suggests using Insight Timer and Gateway to Presence as a start to incorporate meditation into your daily life.

[7:42] - 6. Take a jam break: Be intentional about taking jam breaks. In your work environment, look for safe spots for a jam party; the important thing is that it’s music that you really feel.

[8:58] - 7. Step away from all electronics, including your phone: Going beyond notifications, when we hold our phones we are prone to start doing what this tool helps us to do - checking an email or sending a text. To be present, step away from all electronics so you’re not priming your mind and body to do all the activities that are probably preventing you from being present anyway.

[10:32] - 8. Shut off all but critical notifications from your devices: Think about the importance of what notifications mean - is knowing someone liked a post really nourishing? Getting notifications that don’t really matter can pull us out of being present and we may miss out on something even more important.

[11:37] - 9. Get some nature therapy: Nature can serve as a vehicle to improve cognitive functioning. The stimuli that exist in nature focus our attention in ways that relieve stress, versus the type in urban environments that tend to induce stress.

[12:40] - 10. Play with kids and pets: Playing with kids and pets fire up our oxytocin factories. Oxytocin is a key hormone that promotes trust, relaxation, and happiness in humans. Oxytocins can cause us to pay closer attention to socially relevant stimuli.

[14:00] - 11. Declutter your space: Clutter forces our brains to chunk cluttered areas into one unified mess, and reminds us of unfinished business. It’s hard to be present in a cluttered space, if we’re always thinking about the clutter and what needs to be done with it.

[15:03] - 12. Ask what really matters now: Even our to-do lists can be cluttered. A clean list that’s focused only on what really matters to the person right then is very beneficial. Charlie shares a procedure for how you can work to create a clean to-do list that is focused on what really needs to be accomplished now.

[17:22] - All of the tips are right for you! You can’t go wrong with any of them, and some may be simple enough to accomplish right now.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

12 Simple Ways to be Present, Blog Post, on Productive Flourishing

21 Ways to Quickly Short-Circuit a Funk, on Productive Flourishing

The Creative Giant Show Episode 54: Demystifying Meditation with Susan Piver

Gateway to Presence Guided Meditation, by Tara Brach

Open Heart Project

Environmental Preference and Restoration, by Koole, S. L., van der Wulp, N. Y. & van den Berg, A. E.

Oxytocin-gaze Positive Loop, and the Coevolution of Human-Dog Bonds, by Nagasawa, M. et al.

The Simple Guide to a Clutter-Free Home, by Joshua Becker

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In this episode, fathers/entrepreneurs Mike Bruny and Jeremie Miller join Charlie to talk about how they’ve learned to balance entrepreneurship and fatherhood. In addition to being fathers, both Jeremie and Mike have been pursuing entrepreneurial projects. In this episode, they talk about some of the challenges of being a dad, being an entrepreneur, being a hyper-creative, and juggling multiple different projects.

Key Takeaways:

[3:35] - Currently, Mike is working a full time gig, working part-time to get his MBA, and is father to a three-year-old son, Emerson. Before his son was born, Mike was working for Intel as a manager, and when it shut down and his son was born, he started working on projects and staying home to help raise his son. The biggest thing he noticed about fatherhood was a divide between a dad’s contributions and a mom’s.

[5:22] - Jeremie is dad to a nine-year old son, Finn. He had the unique opportunity to be involved in the feeding aspects of his son’s life, and he ended up spending more time at home than “normal,” and instead of going back to a full time teaching job, he started his business and is currently a mix of entrepreneur and dad.

[7:45] - One challenge comes from balancing work that makes money versus doing work that supports the family non-economically. There may still be some bias that the male journey should be focused on making money, and identity can be attached to that. Both Mike and Jeremie have struggled with “the way things are supposed to be” in terms of traditional gender roles and also some insecurity from a financial standpoint.

[12:35] - Time versus money: Jeremie and his family discuss whether their family needs more time from him or more money. Though there is understanding from his wife, it is still a struggle to accept that she makes more money than him. Mike talks about how he struggles with feeling like he needs to give more of both, and how he will be able to do that.

[15:20] - Charlie brings up the fact that they are pursuing their entrepreneurial ventures on less time than some of their entrepreneurial peers. Jeremie talks about the struggle of comparing his success to others who may be able to focus more of their time on their entrepreneurial ventures.

[20:53] - How can child-rearing minimize, constrain, or affect creative cycles and the rate at which someone can create something? There is more at stake when there are other people (wives, kids) depending on your success. Mike talks about finding “smaller times” to get things done when he can, as well as practicing creativity in his interactions with his son; his struggle remains aligning who he is with his work.

[25:30] - Jeremie found that when he began to compartmentalize his creativity and the time with his son, he was better and more focused on each. The experience for every dad is going to be different.

[29:40] - Charlie and Jeremie talk about the difference between society today and how things have changed since the time they were raised. Mike adds how he has focused on some different language techniques, so Emerson can see the value of effort. And remembering these aspects for ourselves, not just conveying them to our kids, is very important.

[35:30] - Once we’re aware of these aspects, it is important to create space to recognize and celebrate those things. In this space, we can work on growing and manifesting what’s possible now.

[38:55] - We can’t be the best at everything all the time. Jeremie, Mike, and Charlie all talk about examples where one (or all) of our roles may fall slightly short of our expectations.

[43:24] - There are several aspects of parenthood that don’t always get discussed. These types of things are most important to talk about and be honest about, even if the conversations are uncomfortable to have.

[51:40] - It is important to understand that everyone will have different shame triggers. How you solve these particular challenges will be very fluid and different depending on the set of circumstances surrounding it. Finding your way of processing, discussing, and embracing these questions and challenges is the better way to go instead of not asking those questions.

[53:20] - Final words from Mike and Jeremie: every day is a day to learn something new and you can do it! To all the dads out there, you’re modelling something unique and amazing for your kids. Even when you don’t feel like things are going right, you’re still bringing value tp your failures by sharing that with your children.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

Move the Crowd, by Mike Bruny

Mindset, by Carol Dweck

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In the 11th question and answer episode, Angela and Charlie answer questions from the Productive Flourishing Community and the Campfire. The answers focus on habit stacking, how to focus on important but not urgent projects, and a few tips on Medium.

[1:17] - The first question from the Campfire: Are there any resources, links, or suggestions Charlie can offer about habit stacking? What teachables can be broken down into hacks, and how can we take tiny habits and build them up?

[1:55] - Habit stacking is the concept of having a habit that you already do, and following it with a habit that you’re trying to learn. Oftentimes, people think too big with habits - narrow the focus of the habit down to something more specific. Charlie shares an example in his life of how he was able to use habit stacking to accomplish more during his morning routine. He calls each of these habits “micro-habits.” The importance of habit stacking is that it sets up a mental default that gets you going.

[7:05] - As a teacher, you want to think in reverse. What a learner needs is a micro-action to get started - break down what you’re going to be teaching into the smallest possible chunk. His example reminds us to make sure that our learners actually know how to do everything they need to do to accomplish the larger action.

[10:12] - What’s an action item? An action item is similar to a “to-do” item. To write an action item, you want to create a verb-noun construct: place a verb in front of the noun that is the item of consideration. This question is a great example of being able to break down something familiar or routine to explain the process to new learners.

[14:40] - The second question also comes from the Campfire - how do you decide which important but not urgent projects to focus on first? The projects that tie in more to your priorities and values are always going to beat smaller projects that don’t tie in to your priorities and values. Sometimes, what we want to be the most important things for us are not the most important.

[18:01] - Fear can influence the way we prioritize; typically, it may be fear of ostracism or fear of appearing incompetent. One of the ways to get important but not urgent projects to the top is to become truly aware of what your priorities are. If it truly is more important, the next step is having the courage to claim its importance and make the space for yourself to work on that project. The second way to move those projects up is to identify the fear and “claim it, name it, tame it.”

[22:30] - Finally, give yourself time to get through the discomfort of not knowing what you’re doing or how it’s going to turn out. Lean into the creative tension until something starts flowing.

[24:05] - What about the things that are important to do but perhaps not the most desirable or exciting? Charlie talks about a chart he adapted to help make these comparisons. Sandwich these things in between projects you want to do.

[29:00] - The last question comes from the Campfire as well: does Charlie have any advice, tips, or suggestions on using Medium?

[29:27] - Medium is a hybrid product that is a mixture of a hosting platform, a social community, and a product. It’s like Facebook, but it’s for most long-form posts and a variety of essays and articles.

[32:43] - Your profile will show everything that you’ve written, everything that you’ve responded to, and everything that you’ve recommended. In addition, everything on Medium can be “tagged,” and anyone who follows these tags or topics will eventually see posts about them. Medium is a great way to discover all sorts of writers and various topics. Charlie also suggests following publications.

[35:49] - Charlie loves Medium because the comments are really good. There is an interactive element that allows you to address specific elements of a post. To get started, set up your profile and follow topics that interest you. Respond to the content that shows up for you.

[39:41] - The hierarchy of content on Medium is really flat. Every response on Medium shows up as a story- it does not differentiate between leaving a comment and writing a story.

[42:11] - Angela talks about the thread running through all these responses to questions: bigger is not always better. It is about the small steps we can take to be part of the bigger world of any of these topics. Charlie then ties this point to how we can build upon smaller things to do something big in the world.

Mentioned in This Episode:Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

Tiny Habits Program

How to Referee Your Project Cage Match, on Productive Flourishing

A Frog A Day Keeps Your Anchors Aweigh, on Productive Flourishing

Medium

Contact on Productive Flourishing

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We may think creativity and grief wouldn’t normally go together, and yet, creativity and grief are very much related. Cath Duncan and Kara Jones join Charlie to talk about how grief and creativity are related, and why it’s important to do our grief and creativity our own way.

Key Takeaways:

[3:34] - Cath introduces herself and how she moved from her previous work to grief work. She had her own experiences of grief and loss that changed her and taught her what was going to be important in her work, and that helped to guide her journey to her current work.

[6:08] - Kara shares her journey: she used to be an artist and a writer prior to the grief experiences that slammed her family. For her, the connections and work that came after the grief were really an organic experience. When finding reasons to get out of bed after loss, she made connections to her physical body that carried on, and her work as an artist. It was very personal, but eventually translated to connections with other people.

[9:06] - As we experience loss and death and grief, we can choose to destroy ourselves or we can choose to create. Charlie, Cath, and Kara discuss the historical connection between these concepts as well as Cath and Kara’s current work. Kara views it as sort of a continuum, where grief and creativity are ends of a spectrum, and there’s a lot of stuff happening in between. Cath suggests that we can’t have grieving without creativity.

[12:35] - Tentative definition of grieving: a social and creative meaning-making process. We all have meaning-making experiences, and we have to string them together in stories to make sense of what’s going on, how we respond, and who we are. This sort of sense of security is called the Assumptive World. A great loss can shatter this world, and grief is the process of looking at these shattered assumptions and doing a more deliberate review of priorities.

[16:15] - Cath and Kara discuss an expanded definition of creativity as it relates to grief. It goes beyond something analytical. Kara talks about some of the other aspects of everyday life that can be affected by grief, and how different people react creatively.

[20:00] - “The Myth of the Hierarchy of Loss” - Cath talks about this idea of considering socio-cultural ideas of grief and loss to try to qualify or rationalize reactions to different losses. The basic idea of the myth of the hierarchy is that some losses are more important than others, some we don’t talk about, some that society stigmatizes, and where someone thinks they get slotted into the hierarchy (whether by themselves or by others) “tells” them how much they’re allowed to grieve, how they can express it, or how long they can express it.

[23:05] In their class, Cath and Kara teach about the relationships between grieving and shame. Shame, or the idea that we’re faulty or unworthy of belonging, can weave its way into some of the answers that we are considering for our new meanings. They consider questions like where shame comes from, and what sustains shame. A lot of people have experiences that sit outside of the “normal” or “preferred,” and that’s alright.

[30:50] - This definition of creativity is not necessarily making art, but the rather the ability to envision something else. Any time we’re making something, we’re being creative. It’s not the form; it’s the process.

[33:35] - Because we’re human, a lot of us carry around unprocessed grief. In society, we may not always feel like we have adequate time to cope with our grief. Charlie invites Kara and Cath to give an invitation for the listeners in these moments. Kara invites us to explore giving ourselves permission to do what we need to do. Related to that, Cath invites us to not explore grief. If you or someone you love is in denial, that can be okay. You don’t have to perform grief in the ways that others are requiring you to.

[40:05] - Cath discusses some of the genderization of grief with regards to the performance of grief. Along with this, it is important to remember that there’s not only one way to do it. This may be difficult in families where we want to all be experiencing our grief the same way. It is important for couples and families to recognize that people might be having very different experiences and ways of expressing themselves.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

Remembering For Good

When Your Baby Dies

Remembering For Good: The Workbook

The Creative Grief Studio

Mrs. Duck and the Woman, by Kara L.C. Jones

1000 Permissions Granted, by Kara L.C. Jones (PDF)

They Were Still Born, by Janel C. Atlas

Big Magic, by Elizabeth Gilbert

Episode 58: How to Heal After the Loss of A Partner with Kristin Meekhof, on Productive Flourishing

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Today’s episode is a requested reading of a previously published post on Productive Flourishing. The article shows how using the lens of cash flow, opportunity, and visibility is useful for sorting through complex business decisions to determine your most relevant next step. In this reading, Charlie talks about how working through each of the lenses can help enhance the other two in turn.

Key Takeaways:

[0:52] - How do we assess the values of potential business activities? There is a quick framework to help, but we need to think about the goals of our business activities: to generate cash flow, to generate opportunities, or to generate visibility.

[2:20] - Cash flow: It is always important to think about positive cash flow. This keeps us looking at how to get our working capital, rather than “I owe you’s” and unresolved potential payments. While cash flow generating activities are important, they aren’t the only thing we should be doing - a growing business also needs opportunity and visibility.

[3:38] - Opportunities: An effective entrepreneurial executive succeeds in creating opportunities where it seems like there are none, rather than waiting for one to happen. We should ask ourselves what new realities or consequences might result from doing a specific activity, like an opportunity chain. An opportunity chain is a set of cascading opportunities that are synergistic. Your momentum depends on cumulative growth and opportunities.

[5:17] - Visibility: To grow our business, we have to get what we’re doing in front of people. It is a balance between being seen by our ideal customers, and at least being seen by someone. As our visibility grows, we can be more selective about target audiences. It is also important to have our “home base” in order - there needs to be a reason for bringing people back to our sites.

[6:37] - Trade-offs and sweet spots: In business, it may be necessary to trade one goal of business for another. Sometimes, we may need to pull back on cash flow generation to build opportunities and visibility. In these cases, we need to assess consequences from all three aspects to determine the value of participating in a certain activity at the expense of another. It is ideal to do activities that achieve two or more of the goals at once. The more of these sweet spots activities we do, the faster our businesses will grow.

[8:22] - Planning strategically versus operating strategically: When we align both, we can get some powerful results. Thinking about these three goals can help align things more quickly. Take stock of your current state of business - which of the goals are most important right now? How can you combine the goals to get further faster?

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

The 3 Goals of Any Business Activity on Productive Flourishing

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A lot of people have a love-hate relationship with systems. On one hand, they can help clear up a lot of mind chatter and resolve frustrations. On the other hand, they’re not that fun. Many creative people tell themselves they just don’t get systems. In today’s episode, Marina Darlow joins Charlie to discuss the relationships between systems, being creative, and emotion, as well as some of the reasons people avoid building better systems.

Key Takeaways:

[2:35] - Many people might feel that systems/ automation take the humanity or the soul out of projects. Both Charlie and Marina agree that systems can actually allow you to focus on the things that you really care about doing by removing background chatter and the need to engage with things you’d rather not.

[4:20] - Especially among creative giants, many people think that systems will stifle their creativity. However, if you are finding it difficult to move an idea from start to finish, systems can help provide a road map for the in-between (or equipment you have to use, or a playbook).

[8:12] - Systems geeks often conflate processes as well as the tools and apps that run those processes. As a listener, it is helpful to remember that these things go hand in hand. Marina likes to think of a system as a method plus a container, or a tool that helps you implement that method. The focus should be on finding a system that helps to efficiently complete your tasks.

[11:24] - With almost every tool that you start using, there will be a learning curve. Don’t abandon it - if you’re confident in the process, then dealing with the learning curve will become much easier. This stage of getting to understand how a tool works can be difficult for people who consider themselves to be creative.

[15:42] - Splitting up the design, the build, and the following across your business can increase efficiency and decrease frustration, so different people know how to approach that space. As you’re working through new systems, remember NPS - no perfect system.

[18:03] - Marina worked with a client (a filmmaker) who wanted more help planning out his week to accomplish a big project. He was getting stuck, and Marina had him pretend he was writing some material for a series. When he was writing a story instead of writing out tasks, his planning was much easier. Turning unpleasant tasks into a story can allow us to engage with our systems more.

[23:04] - What happens when this project is extended to other clients? Many people jump on board because inventing a story or creating a narrative sounds more fun than putting tasks on the Gantt. When you create a story, you create a system that is very engaging.

[27:30] - Moneyball applied to creativity: the secret of a great player is how many times they are able to get on base. In creative work, you never really see your big hits coming. The more we are “at bat”, the greater the chance that we will have a hit more frequently.

[29:32] - You have to be careful with systems building; sometimes it’s a very sophisticated way of hiding from the very best work you need to do. A good system can help to contain the desire to perfect everything and to hide in the back.

[31:26] - When is it time to scrap systems? Systems can actually hold you back when you try to dream and create a vision. In situations where there may be an emotional block, it makes sense to get away from the current structures you have in place. In some cases of crisis mode, it may be more important to focus on communication first and then find the system that works.

[37:07] - Charlie and Marina talk about system maintenance: after you build it once, you may still need to review your key systems every quarter to see if they’re still working how you need them to. In a way, part of a good system is to self-assess.

[40:40] - When teaching your systems to new employees or new partners, there may be a learning curve as they learn how their technical skills fit into the specific context of your business.

[43:55] - What steps does Marina use with her clients to establish their own personal systems? The first step is the assessment, and she always starts with “what hurts?” Once you know where the struggles lie, you can begin building systems for that point. Also, here is where Marina begins to see how they think. Out of these things, they devise a custom process.

[47:17] - When tackling systems building, start with what hurts the most. There are many ways to determine that and to figure out which systems to tackle first. Coming from a place of emotion can help understand this as well. When you confront that emotional wall, it’s not that you’ve done something wrong, it’s that you’ve done something right and that’s where the work is.

[51:34] - Marina leaves listeners with this invitation: sit for 5-10 minutes and think about which system really bugs them the most in their current state. Think about it from the emotional perspective: what makes you feel either guilt, resentment, or avoidance to figure out what’s not quite going right.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

Vision Framework

Smartsheet

Creative Giant Show Episode 71

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In this Q&A, Angela joins Charlie to answer questions from the Campfire about why they have a no electronics rule in the bedroom or dining room area, how to determine if your current focus block isn’t going to work and how to switch to something else, and how to conduct a mid-month review.

Key Takeaways:

[1:02] - Angela and Charlie have a no electronics rule in the bedroom/ at the dining room table . How did they decide to do this, how do they actually do this, and what do they feel like it’s done for them? How can the listener incorporate this without feeling like they might miss out on business opportunities if they’re not always available?

[1:45] - Firstly, Charlie encourages letting go of the 24/7 availability, unless you are really in an emergency response role. This way, your clients are getting the best you have to offer when you are available. Additionally, we miss more business opportunities because we’re frazzled, not because we’re not available.

[4:20] - Angela and Charlie have been following this rule for about ten years. It began to get frustrating when one would be on their phone while the other was talking, and they wanted to spend the time they had together actually being together. They have a place for their phones when they get home, and also don’t have a television in their bedroom. This allows them to be intentional about their media consumption.

[10:30] - This was born out of personal observation of people browsing through their phones while being engaged with others, and it really started to bother Angela. Charlie and Angela had several discussions about it to figure out the best way to implement and carry it out.

[14:05] - It’s awfully easy to get back into those habits of being constantly connected to our devices, but when we take a step back, we can use that time to connect with ourselves and those around us. To start, we can think about what would feel good to us, then communicate that to clients or family, so we can show up at our best for them.

[20:09] - Jeremy from the Campfire wants to know: How do you determine if your current creative block (focus block) just isn’t going to work and you switch to something different? How do you get back on track with a creative block (focus block) once you start falling off track?

[21:05] - There is a quick recap of what focus blocks are and how they work. Charlie touches on some things that may make it difficult to get through one: getting through the thrash/ resistance and being human. Sometimes, it’s hard to decide where to start or whether something is working. Other times, you might just be in a fog - whether it’s hunger, or exhaustion - and it’s important to understand that this could affect your work.

[26:19] - Taking some time before you start to check in with yourself can help you re-center and get started, or evaluate and decide if you’re time is going to be well-spent in your current state. You may need to take care of yourself before you get started on a focus block.

[28:15] - The last question asked is, can you please explain how to conduct mid-month reviews? What should we be focused on, and what should we look for?

[28:54] - A lot of times when you are in a monthly planning cycle, by the end of the month you might forget what you’re working toward. A mid-month review is important for staying on track and making sure you know where your goals are headed.

[29:46] - Look for a good time in the middle of the month, maybe a Sunday or a Monday. Questions to ask: What have you accomplished this month? What goals or projects need to be adjusted or dropped based upon what has actually happened? What are the priorities for the rest of the month? What bills need to be paid, and what funds are in place to pay them? What projects or tasks have fallen off the radar? When was the last time you rewarded yourself, and when will be the next?

[35:20] - It doesn’t take too long to conduct a mid-month review. Try not to conduct it in your workspace; do it in a place where you can focus on it and be complete about it. The process allows you to start with the good, look for improvement, and then end with a reward for yourself - this is a very encouraging and important process!

[38:01] - Summary of questions and topics discussed. How will they help you flourish this week?

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

The Mid-Month Review

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A lot of creative people thrive on having multiple side projects, but at the same time, having side projects may cause your main projects to suffer. Nicole Stevenson joins Charlie to jam about how having side projects might help you with your main projects. She brings her vast experiences as an entrepreneur - clothing line creator, craft show extraordinaire, illustrator, among many others - to discuss how she got started on the two main ventures she’s working on today, aspects of working with a business partner to make projects work, as well as the various benefits working on side projects can provide to main business projects.

Key Takeaways:

[2:53] - Nicole shares a bit of her history, recounting some of her business and entrepreneurial ventures and tracing their evolution to get to where she is today. Her creative interests led to observations about different things in the crafting community, and she joined with her aunt to start up Patchwork Show and eventually Craft-cation.

[7:47] - Charlie talks about predetermined business plans versus responsive business plans. With Nicole’s sort of adaptive process, how did she and her business partner let go of the old things to focus on the things that matter most right now? As she evaluated which aspects of her work were exciting and profitable, she slowly let other things drop off.

[12:17] - Sometimes when things reach a certain level of maturity, or aren’t as new anymore, they might lose some of the magic that had us holding on to them. On the flip side, sometimes when projects are spaced out at cyclical intervals, each time you come back to it can be new and exciting.

[14:09] - When we’re in the business of making creative things, there are a lot of open-loop projects. Having some closed-loops projects, maybe more of the admin side of your business, can be refreshing to balance out the other projects.

[17:01] - Breaking down your tasks into smaller steps can make tackling some of the big projects more manageable. It can also increase our sense of accomplishment to be completing small steps towards finishing a big task. A good balance between small tasks divided over a certain amount of time is very beneficial in keeping your to-do list manageable.

[20:20] - How can managing side projects make us better at our main projects? Having side projects that may get us connected with other people or things can be refreshing towards work with our main projects.

[23:31] - Part of being a creative knowledge worker is recognizing that our emotion is one of the ingredients we’re working with. It is important to be mindful of our emotions and how they tie in to what we produce. Side projects can be an avenue to separate some of these emotions so the negative effects don’t drift into the main projects.

[25:28] - Charlie talks about the importance of being in a divergent population of creatives, and the benefits of small projects can help the work we do with our main projects be more focused and provide different solutions.

[29:05] - How do Nicole and her business partner workout temporal misalignments, or managing different time requirements between side projects and their main business? Evaluating who is better suited to managing and working on different tasks is important for both parties involved. Specifically for Nicole and Delilah, communication is key.

[33:59] - In a partnership, it is not likely that each person will be doing the exact same work during a week. It is unlikely that it will be an even 50/50 distribution. Keeping track of these hours can also lead to conversations about the relative value of work.

[38:02] - How does Nicole measure success when it comes to all her projects, both side projects and main projects? At the end of the day, she measures success based on whether she is proud of the work she’s doing, and feels like she is giving the best she can give to her community.

[42:28] - For creative entrepreneurs in general, it is important to make reading about financial aspects part of your regular flow.

[45:59] - Nicole leaves listeners with this invitation: start a side project, whether it’s something for your business, something for yourself, or something for your money. Anything that requires your attention is considered a project - pick a project out that is the most manageable for where you are.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

Nicole Stevenson Studio

Dear Handmade Life

Patchwork Show

Craftcation

Chunking

TCGS Episode 131 with Larry Robertson

App: Hours Keeper

Investment App: Acorns

Credit App: Credit Karma

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Today’s episode is a requested reading of a previously published post on Productive Flourishing named “5 Ways to Get Through the Creative Red Zone.” This article lists five ways to get projects that are almost done into the finished stage.

Key Takeaways:

[0:48] - The creative “red zone” is when you have a project that is almost finished, and you feel as if you have just as much to do as you did when you started the final push. Charlie discusses this analogy as it relates to football and creative projects.

[3:04] - 1. Double-down by returning to the why of a project: As we draw toward deadlines, we tend to lose sight of why we started the project in the first place. Reminding ourselves why can give us the extra push we need to finish - a gift to both ourselves and others.

[3:45] - 2. Focus on getting it to good enough: If your goal is perfection, you will never get it done. We need other people to make our work excellent, which requires us to let go when it’s good enough.

[4:16] - 3. Know that the more it matters, the more it’s only a start anyway: We often falsely assume that the more it matters, the better the start of it should be. In reality, the more something matters, the better it is that we start finishing sooner, so we can get it out in the world.

[5:02] - 4. Understand that you’re usually working on your own mindset toward the end: Often, once we’re in the red zone, we continue to work without really getting anywhere. What we’re really working on is our own mindset.

[6:02] - 5. Do your work, and then step away: There’s only so much we can do with creative work to make sure that it’s successful. When you make art, you give up predictability for remarkability.

[6:37] - In finishing creative work, we risk our project failing, but we’ll be out of the red zone. Finishing a project allows for more self-reflection and change moving forward.

[7:07] - You’ll always have a red zone; it never goes away if you’re really showing up. Charlie encourages us to get real about the type of projects in which we are investing our time.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

Original Post: 5 Ways to Get Through the Creative Red Zone

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As entrepreneurs and small business owners, we can help create solutions that create positive social change - promoting diversity and inclusion, distributing wealth, creating opportunities, and promote flourishing. In today’s episode, Pam Slim joins Charlie to talk about how small business owners can lead the way for this change. Tune in today to hear their discussion and ideas!

Key Takeaways:

[3:51] - They share a love of supporting the small business market, specifically those that are the lifeblood of communities - founded on passion and dreams. As social dynamics change, how can we continue to support this small business sector?

[7:10] - Pam shares her work with her new business - a physical place to foster growth. Through her previous travels, she gained great insight into communities coming together to connect, and this spurred her to work to create a positive experience in her own community - specifically focusing on the Native American community as well as other marginalized communities in Mesa, AZ.

[11:43] - In what ways can one be involved in these kinds of conversations? One of the biggest things for Charlie and Pam is being more intentionally inclusive and working to expand diversity in speaker panels and leadership boards. In addition, this creates spaces where more people feel that they belong and have something to contribute.

[16:10] - From a small business perspective, there has been a tremendous amount of opportunity and growth in the small business sector, as well as within certain markets and demographics.

[20:33] - Pro-big versus pro-small camps: While there is the argument that the big companies generate wealth, the small companies distribute wealth. We need both, especially considering the opportunities small businesses can offer to vulnerable youth, recent graduates, and even older seniors wanting to get back into the workforce. These opportunities could be life-changing for some groups of people who are feeling rejected or unwanted in the workforce.

[25:47] - Bouncing off the creation of new businesses and spaces, how can existing businesses be intentional about providing an atmosphere in which people with various backgrounds can work?

[29:12] - There’s constant learning, and also such great change and innovation that can happen by beginning to ask questions and make some of these intentional shifts. Pam talks about expanding the definition of success to include not just personal financial gain, but also the health and well-being of the surrounding community.

[31:40] - It is a limiting belief that focusing on some of these changes is going to cost a lot to execute. When you do the work, it doesn’t, and the gain is huge! People from diverse communities actually seek businesses and organizations that support their communities.

[36:25] - We all have work to do in our communities, but there’s never a bad time to start the work that needs to be done.

[37:00] - Charlie talks about his experiences when he first moved to Portland to connect with some of these communities (not just online). He got connected with the investment community and learned about how decisions are made within companies, and was able to apply this knowledge to more of the native communities in Portland.

[39:12] - Since starting this venture, it has really encouraged Charlie to focus on simple, but universal messages that apply across communities. Thinking about this can change the approach of discussing some topics with different communities of people.

[45:55] - Perhaps our goals in terms of charitable giving should be looking into how we can be doing the work with other people as equals.

[48:04] - Charlie and Pam talk about hiring locally versus looking outside of our communities or even the nation for hiring. There is great discussion of different considerations from both sides!

[51:26] - The point is to start asking questions about how you are intentionally making choices in your business that benefit your local, national, and global communities. Our benefits come from thinking outside the box of a self-gain model.

[54:03] - Pam’s invitation for listeners: look at your community, notice and celebrate which people are participating in your community, ask yourself who is not here, then ask yourself why they are not there. Then, ask yourself how you can begin to build bridges to people you want to be there. What small step can you make in the next week?

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

Escape from Cubicle Nation

K’é

Body of Work: Finding the Thread That Ties Your Story Together

Escape for Cubicle Nation (Book)

one n ten

Malcom Gladwell: The Tipping Point

The Creative Giant Show: Episode 1

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In the 9th Q&A episode, Angela joins Charlie to answer questions from the campfire about decision fatigue, business growth problems, and how to manage multiple projects when you’re already overwhelmed.

Key Takeaways:

[1:06] - The show must go on! As a precursor to the depth of this episode, Charlie and Angela talk a bit about balancing hectic schedules with times of self care.

[4:03] - The first listener from the Campfire wants to know what advice Charlie can offer on how she can reduce decision fatigue in all areas of her life.

[4:18] - Decision fatigue is when you are in the midst of making either micro or normal decisions, and you wear out. Charlie suggests a few things to help: 1) Defaults can save you so much by eliminating some of decisions you have to make, because you’ve already made them in advance. 2) Try to have your bigger decisions happen when you have high energy; creating and keeping a decision list can to help organize and prioritize these things. 3) Look for ways you can make top level decisions by analyzing more deeply the source of decision on a lower level.

[9:30] - Angela talks about how things can very easily start to cascade down when we haven’t had a chance to sit down and premeditate some of our decisions. Taking a little time beforehand to plan some things can save time and stress later on down the road when you have to make the decision or carry out a task.

[11:58] - Another campfire listener wants to know what suggestions Charlie has to handle business growth problems, specifically because she’s grappling between scaling and pivoting in her business.

[12:34] - When you’re have a growth challenge, take a moment to think about where you want to be three or five years down the road, and how does what you’re thinking about doing help get you there or prevent you from getting there.

[14:17] - Charlie encourages thinking about what scaling might allow you to do that really matters for your business, your team, your family, and your business ecosystem. Be clear about the why when it comes to growth and scaling.

[17:38] - In almost every case, eliminating something you’re doing is usually the best track forward, whether you’re scaling or pivoting. Anticipate that you might be making these types of decisions about every five to seven years.

[19:45] - Our last campfire listener is looking for some best practices on managing multiple projects, both in a professional and personal sense. How can she handle more than she can handle, and what tools and systems can be used to keep track of everything?

[21:00] - The first thing to do is start with a triage: which of the projects are absolutely essential? The timeline may need to be upleveled - set goals around the number of focus blocks you have. Another way to approach it may be by dedicating a day to one project, and moving each further along in that manner.

[23:42] - The other thing is to maybe get to a point of acceptable mediocrity - we can’t be excellent at everything all the time. Communicating with a support system the things you can and can’t do is very important.

[26:48] - We have to learn to say no more than we say yes; you can’t say yes to everything. Continue to check in with saying yes to the things that are in alignment for you.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

The Five Why’s

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Productive Flourishing

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Larry Robertson, author and thought leader, joins Charlie to jam about creativity. In this episode, they cover everything including what creativity is, where breakthroughs come through, unhelpful myths that prevent us from understanding creativity, the roles space and time have for the creative process, and the different modes of creativity.

Key Takeaways:

[0:56] - Charlie gives an introduction to Larry Robertson.

[3:50] - Through his previous experiences in various roles in the entrepreneurial universe, Larry started noticing a pattern of people wanting to know “what is entrepreneurship?” His first book was a pull back to explore how entrepreneurship fits into a larger picture, and what is behind entrepreneurship: creativity.

[7:51] - Charlie and Larry talk about the tension between the context of business and a context outside of business. How can we look outwards from the limited focus of our domains of expertise to invite other elements into our business practices?

[11:07] - One of the keys to creativity is that is it variable - things (and you!) are going to change with time and circumstances. When we lean into this change, it can be quite uncomfortable - when we realize that this is part of the process, it can actually invite more moments of creativity.

[14:46] - Creativity is something we often seek out when we are in a pinch. Larry’s book approaches creativity from the opposite perspective. Rather than thinking of where creativity ends, he encourages focus on where it begins and the process that it flows through.

[17:02] - Charlie talks about his concept of slow magic: sometimes the work that matters the most happens slowly.

[22:06] - Continuing this idea of a slow build versus lightning strikes, Larry talks about creativity being an accumulation. How can we lead ourselves toward that accumulation that leads to the big idea?

[23:42] - Stu Coffman’s concept of the adjacent possible: sometimes the biggest breakthroughs come from just moving to the edges of what you know. When you look back on the world you know, you can’t help but see it differently. Finally, when you explore the adjacent possible, you make the possible bigger.

[27:27] - When you’re trying to figure out how to move forward with your next big idea, the trick is to immerse yourself into the work being done in not just your field, but also in the fields where your expertise overlaps with your other interests. Allow yourself to fall into this space and find those happy accidents.

[32:55] - Charlie talks about the importance of having a community of people with varied interests, passions, and expertises, and interacting with that community. This community lends itself to the idea of creativity as a co-creation.

[36:58] - We have to be ready for interaction with a creative community. Larry talks about ways we can prepare ourselves on an individual level before we start to become part of a co-creation.

[40:15] - Five habits of the mind: 1. How do you know what you know? 2. Is there a pattern? 3. Ask “what if” questions 4. Is there another way of looking at it? 5. Who cares? Charlie shares some of his questions of the mind as well.

[46:18] - Asking these questions, both in a personal and a professional context, can confirm that you’re on the right track or bring attention to something that could be changed for the better. These can be guided by the three acts of creation: choice, reaction, and improvisation.

[49:22] - How do we actionize the three acts of creation? When all three modes of creation are on the same plane, we can think about where we are on the matrix and how we can lean into those modes. We can also apply these modes in different contexts and situations.

[55:16] - We all have all three acts of creation. It is important to not think of them as a hierarchy, but to work to constantly move between them so you can develop them all.

[58:11] - Larry leaves us with this challenge: “The perpetual obstacle to human advancement is custom”: What are your customs that are getting in the way of your own advancement?

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

A Deliberate Pause: Entrepreneurship and its Moment in Human Progress by Larry Robertson

The Language of Man: Learning to Speak Creativity by Larry Robertson

Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert

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Today’s episode is a requested reading of a previous published post on Productive Flourishing. Charlie answers a question about making time to plan and how he uses certain materials to organize and remind. The key idea is that you have to make time for planning, so that you save or don’t waste time when you’re in the doing.

Key Takeaways:

[0:49] - Conversation started with Eric Grey about their momentum planners - his concerns are about time spent interfacing with the system as well as time spent on a daily, weekly, and monthly basis to plan.

[2:02] - The hard part is the start-up cost of using a new system. Once you have the “roadmap” built, the time spent each week will be much less. You do have to regularly spend time with the system, but the planners help to make this easier.

[3:57] - Charlie uses digital apps more to memorize and remind, rather than to sort through what he needs to get done. Once he has organized what he’s doing, then he will put it in the digital app. This helps keep things in the moment.

[4:59] - A hybrid approach is beneficial when the time is put in up front. When you make time to make time, you start to see that some of the things you’re doing may not be what matters most, or it can shed light on some of our habits.

[5:41] - No productivity system can override your choices - they serve to support and facilitate the self-mastery of your chosen goals.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

Podcast Page

Original Blog Post: You Have to Make Time to Make Time

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Mike Vardy, a friend and fellow productivity teacher, joins Charlie to talk about the power of defaults, theming your week, how to use creative/focus blocks, and how effective scheduling, planning, and decision making is really about being kind to yourself.

Key Takeaways:

[2:25] - Productivity should be fun! It is important to find a harmony between frameworks that help to keep us in check, and frameworks that are too rigid to allow for fun in our productivity.

[4:18] - Charlie and Mike talk about what happens when they experiment with their schedules, and how we can prioritize our schedules to suit our personal productivity goals. This is especially pertinent to morning people versus night owls. When we experiment, we can figure out what works for us and what doesn’t.

[7:05] - Both Charlie and Mike speak to the idea of spontaneity within a structured schedule. When it comes to free time, they both encourage doing things you really want to do during your open time. They talk about to-do lists and calendars, and how you can organize these to meet your needs.

[10:30] - Mike talks about personalizing our productivity, and how that might benefit productivity in our personal goals, as well as in the workplace. How might this look for meetings?

[13:00] - Mike talks about the idea of “whole-ocracy” and how adopting this idea might make meetings more efficient and beneficial for everyone’s productivity. Organizations need to have a framework that they can thrive within, rather than one they just survive within.

[14:30] - Charlie and Mike talk about meetings, and the most effective ways to organize and carry them out, and what benefits meetings have for team building.

[19:02] - Charlie talks about the idea of “strategic mindfulness” - having meetings where you can hash specific things out will prevent those things from taking space at other inopportune moments. This will allow us to present in other important moments.

[20:23] - Charlie talks about Mike’s practice of theming days - in this practice, you have a default for the day; you know what you’re doing that day, and you also know there’s a time and place for everything. Mike also has monthly themes that help to funnel his goals for his daily themes.

[25:17] - Creative blocks and focus blocks: if you have tasks you need to get accomplished, you can chunk it out into what you can get done into two or three focus blocks. It is more attainable to figure out what you can accomplish in 90 minutes rather than a whole day. Pre-planning also leaves us in a better place to set ourselves up for success.

[28:00] - Charlie and Mike talk about the idea of fierce kindness, and how that affects pre-planning and actual execution.

[30:43] - What is the balance between work and rest or work and play? There are appropriate times where it is okay to not be doing anything, especially if it will be beneficial for your physical or mental health. If your day gets derailed, don’t consider the day’s theme a failure.

[35:40] - Many people focus on what they can’t doing during a day, as opposed to what they can. If we shift our thinking to what we can get done in the absence of other things, that can change our relationship with productivity.

[37:58] - If you’re high-energy in the evening, lean into that. You can map your days based on your theme of the day, your focus blocks, and what time of the day is the best time to work on these things. With defaults in place, we can start to see a pattern in our productivity.

[41:28] - The relationship is more important than the project. As we decide what to take on, it’s important to make sure we have the ability to devote our best time and energy to the project and the relationship. When we’re kind to others, we’re kind to ourselves.

[44:04] - Mike’s invitation and challenge to listeners: theme your week! Figure out how you can theme your days and finish more often the things you want to get done and move forward.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

Productive Flourishing Planners

productivityist.com/creativegiant

Mike’s Page - link to books and other resources

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Angela joins Charlie as he tackles three questions revolving around how to take action on a good idea without it being overwhelming, how to discuss goals and finances with your business team without it being awkward, and which of the Productive Flourishing planners to use to get to your creative energy flowing.

Key Takeaways:

[1:25] - Alison wants to know how to get out of planning and research and into production. How can we get more connectivity between opt-ins, low- and mid-tier offerings, and service offerings?

[2:00] - Ideally you would use a full customer journey map. Charlie suggests looking at those ideas in a four-part funnel: free stuff at the top, then low cost items, your medium tier, and then your high tier. In addition, he talks about what sorts of things typically fall into each category, and how those can anchor the funnel and enhance the customer journey.

[6:56] - Charlie proposes that perhaps as experts, some of the tension comes from our quest to be very specific or cutting edge, but we must remember that our customers may come to us with basic questions. How do you take the conventional stuff you need to cover and make it really relevant and useful for your audience?

[8:29] - Jen from the Campfire wants to know: What suggestions does Charlie have on if/how to discuss the financial side of a business with a small team, especially when it comes to revenue and bonuses? Scenario planning can be very beneficial in imagining/planning what you would do for your financials, operations, goals, and strategies (FOGS).

[10:55] - Charlie talks about “open book management” and the spectrum of different ways you can discuss your finances with your whole team. You can share revenue goals without getting too specific about the breakdown.

[14:08] - Too often founders and owners stress too much about the pay factor, and it is good to remember that part of the relationship does involve a good work environment, the culture, the mission, and the projects. The work there should be a benefit.

[16:30] - A creative giant wants to know: Do you have any suggestions on which of your tools or planners I could start with that could help me harness my creative pull and get back in the game? Charlie recommends their “Productivity Jump Starter” and “Action Item Catcher.”

[18:18] - Once you get rolling, he suggests either the “Weekly Momentum Planner” or the “Monthly Momentum Planner.” Each has its benefits depending on where you are with your projects.

[20:21] - Many planning tools assume you’re going to be in the same frame of mind each time you sit down to plan. The different planners may provide different tools to fit where you might be.

[22:58] - The trend across all three of these questions is grouping like things together first, then specifically deciding what to do with each, so you can organize your next step.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

Link to free planners - Download today!

Omnifocus

Questions: email Charlie at charlie@productiveflourishing.com

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In this episode, Charlie and Jennifer cover the “behind the scenes” of how Charlie gets stuff done. Tune in to find out everything from why he joined the army and how he applies that to his work to his workout and self-care routines. If you like “behind the scenes” or “making of,” you’ll love this episode.

Key Takeaways:

[3:13] - Charlie shares his origin story, highlighting what made him decide to go into the military. Although many of his family members also joined the army, Charlie didn’t feel pressured, but rather found that this is where he thrived.

[7:22] - After eight years in the national guard, what routines or structures has Charlie carried forward with him that he gained from his experience being in the military? The biggest things are resiliency and internal coping strategies, as well as frameworks and codifying information.

[12:12] - How has the resiliency and internal coping strategies helped Charlie coach other entrepreneurs? One of the main things is teaching them how to be adaptable people who can slide anywhere they need to in their business.

[14:40] - Charlie mentioned that he works out two to three times a week; what does that look like for Charlie? He talks about working out with a friend, and overcoming the initial hurdle of making it a habit.

[19:08] - What else is encompassed in Charlie’s self-care routine? Highlights include tea, meditation, and limited screen time.

[23:35] - Charlie talks about his tech setup, which is all Mac.

[28:30] - What happens when Charlie travels? Sometimes he takes his work with him, but it can be hard to get things done during the actual act of traveling. Charlie shares a bit about what works best for him for getting work done on the go.

[32:00] - Jennifer asks Charlie to share some of his failed experiments. In addition to which he experiments he tried, he more importantly shares what he learned from the ventures that maybe didn’t go so well.

[38:53] - Charlie talks about creating channels of communications with others. In the previous question he spoke about getting to know the content preference of his audience, but this also broadens to include seeking help from others.

[42:20] - Charlie and Jennifer engage in a series of rapid-fire questions to better understand Charlie.

[46:13] - What unanticipated challenge is Charlie currently facing? It is harder to let go of the manager aspects of his business than he originally imagined.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

Jennifer’s Company: TERP Associates LLC

Jennifer’s Books: Mentoring Programs that Work and Real World Training Guide

The Creative Giant Show Episode 100

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Today’s episode is a requested reading of a previously published post on Productive Flourishing named “Stop Lying and Start Creating.” The key idea is that we creative people are particularly adept at making up stories and lies that keep us from doing work - especially when it comes to research.

Key Takeaways:

[0:57] - Creative people have a unique talent that exceeds our ability to create. Charlie talks about meta-doing and how creative people often participate in this.

[1:30] - While we’re meta-doing, we are in a comfortable space. Charlie goes on to explain why.

[2:05] - It is easy for creatives to get caught up in research - studying other people’s work and going back to previous research. While this is part of the creative process, there is a point at which you have enough information to get started.

[3:05] - At a certain point, research can make you more scared if you feel your contributions will be dwarfed by the “experts” and their work.

[3:30] - Charlie gives some ideas of how to get creating for several different mediums. Create something in the world today!

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

Original Blog Post

Productive Flourishing

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Toku McCree joins Charlie to jam about what they’ve experienced in themselves and their clients, and how to move through the guilt of getting what you want to achieve success.

Key Takeaways:

[2:16] - Obsession with tactics and doing and how it stifles their business and personal growth. Often times when people reach a certain level of success and plateau, they are not fundamentally focusing on what’s going to make the biggest difference.

[3:25] - When you get to the top 10% - 25%, tactics only go so far. Leadership relies very heavily on who you are as a person, rather than tweaking the tech side of things.

[5:20] - To make the significant change, the way in which you actually make decisions, actually respond to things, and actually see the world, have to reflect the reality that’s right in front of you. Reflective equilibrium: if our experience of the world is different from our theory about the world, we have to switch something - normally we change our theories to fit the world.

[7:33] - Toku speaks about what happens when the world shifts so dramatically with some people’s success.

[10:01] - So many people get stuck at an 8 out of 10 in life. But the work in those last two levels is where the real challenge lies. Your focus begins to shift inward to figure out how you need to grow and be in the world to achieve a higher level of success.

[14:34] - In what way is a more virtuous man happy? This question posed by the Greeks is relevant to this topic as we think about what the payout is. Will you have to sacrifice something to gain the success you want, whether it be personal or business? Toku suggests the top 1% or 2% have mastered the balance between the tactics and the work on being, which aids in their success.

[21:31] - Charlie and Toku talk about the benefits of having a coach or a group of people that can help dig deeper than the tactics and get into the being.

[22:55] - Toku poses the question: Are you willing to experience the guilt of getting what you want? To peak the plateau, you may have to change the groups you associate with and the kind of person you think you are. Ultimately, you get to decide what group you want to belong to, and who you want to be.

[28:53] - The thing you have the least amount of control over is the groups you’re born into, but the thing you have the most control over is the groups you belong to. It is hard work to live a virtuous life.

[32:22] - Toku shares his own story about the being piece.

[36:15] - Three-fold question: 1) Why do you want your business to grow a certain way? 2) In what ways do you want to pursue your personal growth? 3) How can you do this without there being a competition or a compromise?

[39:58] - At a certain point in your life, your growth may not be accelerating at the same pace. It might be a 10-15% improvement every year, and that is just fine. Embrace the plateau.

[46:45] - If you’re willing to sacrifice your ordinary excellence for something extraordinary, and become a beginner again, you can be in a place of being in continual wonder and amazement of what life can give to you. We have to learn how to fall in love with a process over and over again.

[48:42] - Toku’s challenge: For one week, try to make all your decisions based upon the question: “In this moment, what would bring me joy?” Lean into the discomfort of choosing joy and accepting the guilt that may follow.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

The Hero With a Thousand Faces - Joseph Campbell

Productive Flourishing

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Angela joins Charlie as they tackle another question & answer session, exploring the priority cage match, how to bring in more diversity into your company, and what to do when your plans are too intense.

Key Takeaways:

[0:54] - Can you elaborate more on the priorities cage match? How do you allot time to things in the middle?

[2:41] - When you work on several things, it’s easy to see that some things may not hold as much urgency. As the cage match illuminates your priorities, there’s a middle section of projects and goals that aren’t the most important, but they’re also not at the bottom.

[6:18] - Put these projects in the schedule and devote time to them, and don’t allow yourself to get distracted by other things. The progress might not look the same as with the first-priority projects, but that is okay.

[8:07] - Do you stack functions or devote certain days to certain tasks? The more you can stack in the productive areas of your life, the better off you are.

[10:57] - Some of these projects get stuck in the middle because we don’t give ourselves permission to do things that make us come alive.

[12:45] - As a company which has started to incorporate more diversity into our leadership, how can we grow in this aspect, and groom people from more diverse backgrounds to become leaders in our company?

[13:32] - Don’t be reactive about diversity. Be proactive about getting engaged with the communities you want to be diverse in.

[16:53] - Diversity by design: Your organization becomes diverse because you design it that way, rather than hoping it will become that way. Be strategic about how you approach groups and market yourself as a diversity-friendly company.

[21:07] - Make sure people from the diverse backgrounds have the awareness of, and same access to the professional development opportunities that everyone else does.

[23:53] - How do you decide whether your plan is too intense-activity heavy? Do you have tips for noticing you’re doing this while planning?

[24:45] - We don’t have as much of the high-peak creative time as we would like. We often under-account for how taxing mental activity is.

[26:02] - Think about your work more like a fitness regime: you have to balance the sprints with the jogs and the walks. It’s better to put three solid points on the board every day, rather than some days where you have none because you tapped out the previous day.

[29:33] - Working at a good 85% with 100% focus, and being okay with the additional margin, is a good place to be in because it gives you space to spend with whatever else comes up in your life.

[30:39] - When you look at your list, really sort by how heavy of an activity is going to be. If you notice they are all very involved, look at how you can spread them out.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

Productive Flourishing: Project Cagematch

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Kristin Reinbach joins Charlie to discuss the question of whether happiness is dependent on the culture we’re from. They talk about the difference between social norms of success and happiness versus our personal concepts of success and happiness.

Key Takeaways:

[2:45] - How did Kristin get to where she is today? What inspired her to get into the “happy-making business” she’s in now?

[5:15] - Charlie and Kristin engage in a conversation about happiness in other cultures that seem not to make business endeavors a primary focus. Kristin specifically shares her experience from living in Germany.

[8:07] - There seems to be a shift from entrepreneurial success to more of a focus on happiness and a good life. But is there a gender stigma surrounding this idea?

[9:52] - Happiness across cultures can get convoluted because people think of the effect of happiness rather than the deeper level of flourishing and thriving.

[11:35] - What if creativity was more important than well-being? Kristin suggests that perhaps happiness linked to joy is more of a short-term happiness, while creativity is a more sustainable version of happiness.

[15:05] - As a Western culture, we don’t seem to talk about things like character and courage as much as we used to. These things can drive our creativity and our business.

[19:45] - Kristin and Charlie talk about some cultural differences between the United States and Europe in terms of how we view creativity and success in conjunction with each other, and whether that career path is acceptable in that culture.

[24:05] - What are some of the differences between the genders in terms of how they approach and react to their work? A good question to ask might be: How do you want to feel?

[28:00] - We are conditioned by society. This can have a big impact on whether we should be happy (surface) versus whether we are really feeling a deep, internal happiness. How does age factor into this?

[35:23] - Creativity is a great tool to extend our purpose and success beyond what we do day to day to make a living.

[37:57] - It is important to recognize your own creative potential, and to be able to differentiate between your version of happiness from your society’s version of happiness.

[38:40] - Kristin encourages us to reevaluate the way think about what should make us happy, and focus on more on feeling happiness at a deeper level. She presents four points: be conscious about when we should feel happy, pay attention to when we’re envious, be in touch with our feelings, and the 101 Wishes List.

[44:26] - Lean into the things that matter to you. Find a way to reflect on the things that matter to you.

[46:27] - Kristin’s challenge: do something during the next week that feels really pointless, and see what happens. Her invitation: be a good human being - support other people who are afraid to allow their creativity to flourish.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

Krysalis Consult

Club of Happy Lifepreneurs

Coach Myself, by Cynthia Morris

First Class Meetings, by Michael Wilkinson

The 4-Hour Workweek

Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life

Wipe the slate clean

101 wishes - chicken soup book

750 Words

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Today’s episode is a requested reading of a previously published post on Productive Flourishing called “Welcome to Project World.” The key idea is that we no longer live in a world defined by careers, but rather by projects. What we finish is more important than what we’ve been doing and working on.

Key Takeaways:

[0:51] - Charlie suggests that the Industrial Revolution began a time when the world of work was “career world.” The focus shifted toward work that served a mass of unknown customers.

[1:55] - Jobs in project world: In career world, we go to school to work for a company we’d likely work for during our entire careers up to retirement. In project world, the longevity of the same job is much shorter. Charlie explains why.

[4:02] - When we leave a job in project world, the only thing we take with us are the things that we have finished. What counts is what we build, sell, or manage.

[4:56] - Entrepreneurs and small business owners in project world: In this day and age, things are changing so quickly and that can put a lot of pressure on entrepreneurs and small business owners.

[6:05] - People want to buy and experience a product - they will only buy our words for so long.

[6:23] - General practices in project world: Finish something every day. Charlie calls this “shipping” - getting something out of our heads and into the world. We are the most fulfilled when we make progress on meaningful goals.

[7:17] - We have unprecedented autonomy, adventure, and chance for impact via network effects. We are happiest when we’re actually finishing the work we’re meant to do.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

Welcome to Project World post

Drive by Dan Pink

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Charlie and Angela talk about values and expectations, priorities, and boundaries in order to amp up your holidays without amping up your stress.

Key Takeaways:

[1:25] - Intentionality during the holidays: what do we want this time to look like?

[3:22] - There are a lot of expectations surrounding the holiday season. It is important to have conversations about how we’d like to spend (or not spend) that time with our loved ones. We don’t want that time to pass and realize we were unable to make the connections we desired.

[6:04] - It is important to focus on what we hope to feel during the holidays, rather than the things we have to do. When we’re focused on a feeling, we can project that feeling into the world. Make some space to sink into that intention so we can embody that.

[10:05] - The holidays can end up becoming a process of capturing several moments that we typically have idealized in our minds. It can be hard to reconcile when something doesn’t go as planned, but we can still embody love (or any other feeling) during those times.

[13:40] - Angela encourages us to take some time to think about what our intentions are during this time of the year, to gain some clarity about what they are and perhaps share our expectations with others. It is also important to be clear about our boundaries.

[15:50] - Having intentions around feelings rather activities will help with expectations. There is a probability that things won’t go exactly as we intended them to, but how we react to those unmet expectations can really shape the feelings around the event.

[17:17] - Typically, a lot of the responsibility for a picture-perfect holiday is tied up in women’s work. Angela encourages people to look for ways to pull other members of the family in, so they can contribute something unique to the larger expectation. Also, make sure you take care of yourself.

[19:45] - If someone in the family is really passionate about one of the traditions, one option is to enroll them and delegate that responsibility to them. Enrolling other people can expose just the amount of work that goes into certain aspects of the holidays.

[22:40] - Positive boundaries are things we are going to do; negative boundaries are things we are not going to do. Boundaries are important so our focus remains on our intentions and feelings we hope to project, rather than getting weighed down in things we have to do.

[24:54] - Being intentional in the right way leads to us being happier and less stressed during this holiday season. It can also help us have time to be who we are and do what we need to do.

[27:23] - Our intentionality with this time of year and the holidays can help to lead us into a happier new year. Charlie challenges us to be clear about the ways we want to feel and how we can project that into the world.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

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Our host, Charlie and his wife, Angela answer community members’ questions about networking, project post-mortems, and share real experiences of how they work together as a married couple.

Key Takeaways:

[1:04] - As a solo entrepreneur, how do we go about figuring out how to be the one that gives instead of the one who takes? How forward can we be when offering our help?

[2:06] - Think about how your personal values and principles can translate to your business practices. At the same time, think about how you can be forward about the specific kind of help you can provide, based on the knowledge of your career.

[5:35] - Do you know of a methodology to archive or store learnings in order to serve as a knowledge base for other stakeholders within the business, specifically with post-mortems after projects are lost? How can it be used to upskill your staff and bring new people to the team?

[6:25] - Make sure you have someone who will facilitate an after action review: what did we want to happen, what actually happened, and what do we want to do differently in the future? An honest conversation about how a project went is crucial for a beneficial project post-mortem.

[9:57] - Make sure after you’ve reviewed a project, you put that information somewhere that you can access in the future. Before you start a new project, take time to re-read them so you can avoid making the same mistakes moving forward.

[13:45] - How do you work in harmony as a married couple? How do you not let your entire life become about your work?

[15:03] - Carve out time for you and your spouse as a couple, so you have a chance to be together outside of work, focusing on each other personally more than professionally.

[18:30] - Angela and Charlie also have a practice where they don’t use their phones and also allow for transition time to move between work zone and couple zone.

[22:18] - Discover your boundaries as an individual for work-related talk outside of business hours, and check in with your spouse or partner to establish a mutual understanding.

[26:27] - When it comes to work performance, these types of conversations can get a little tricky. But it’s important to discuss them during business hours, rather than bringing them home into the personal realm.

[29:00] - Continue to send in your questions on the Creative Giant Campfire or send your questions straight to Angela.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

The Small Business Lifestyle

Confluence

Igloo

Evernote

Google Drive

Episode 117: Q&A 5

Angela@productiveflourishing.com

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Mary Fran Bontempo joins Charlie to discuss how aging can be a gift, and how to make words like change, fear, and fine not be dirty words. They also discuss how much of our identities is fixed by the stuff we accumulate.

Key Takeaways:

[1:19] - Introduction to Mary Fran Bontempo and how she got started in her writing career. She talks about how her creativity grew from a really dark spot in her life. The fear and hesitance of her situation sparked her creative process.

[2:30] - Many people who are in the “fall/mid-winter” stage of their lives are reluctant to pursue creativity. Why? We should embrace creativity throughout the many years of our lives. Yes, there may be many more things on our plates, but that doesn’t mean we can’t make time for something new.

[4:15] - What would you say to someone who is unsure of where to start and how to keep up? We can choose to continue to evolve with new technology developments and try things out to see what works.

[6:48] - Mindset around aging - how do we see it as a gift rather than a sentence? Mary Fran talks about a new way to define where we are now; sometimes we have to learn to disengage from the expectations of our “now” to break into something new.

[8:49] - Mary offers three tips and strategies for parents wanting to lean out of the routines that are no longer as relevant to where they are now.

[9:56] - Charlie follows up on that discussion with ideas about a few different types of dependency: negative codependency and interdependency. This relationship between child and parent can be scary for parents when it no longer exists in the same capacity.

[12:18] - As the average lifespan is increasing, we have more time - before, while, and especially after - having kids, that has so much potential for becoming a time of creativity.

[13:55] - What are some of the fears that prevent us from doing the things we know we need to do to continue progressing? This is especially applicable for young people.

[18:02] - There are often a host of opportunities available to us. As we are moving forward in our lives, it may be more beneficial to make decisions that will keep you moving forward, rather than getting stuck waiting around for something to come along. You may end up opening more doors for yourself!

[19:25] - Charlie discusses the shift from a “career world” to a “project world.” What does that mean for younger generations as well as older generations of entrepreneurs and forward thinkers?

[23:20] - Change as a dirty word. Change often comes hand in hand with fear - we think it will wreak havoc on our lives, but Mary Fran encourages us to remember that we deal with change on a regular basis and we can handle it. This perspective can help carry us through bigger changes in our lives.

[26:35] - We typically underestimate our own capabilities. How will we respond when we receive the “cosmic kick in the butt?” Our response can show us what the full range of what we are capable of - don’t get too comfortable.

[28:48] - The dirty word fine. Mary Fran and Charlie discuss different uses of the word ‘fine’, and the pros and cons of accepting fine and also exploring new words to define a similar state.

[31:47] - Charlie talks about some societal norms we encounter when talking about our current state. How do people typically respond when we share some of the things we’re grateful for, versus the things that bother us?

[35:01] - The self-talk that we run through our head is a choice, and we can choose to use that to put something positive out into the world. Conversely, we can change our self-talk to encourage better attitudes for the things coming ahead, creating a flow between the subconscious and the conscious. This can have a great effect on how we feel about getting older and our place in the world.

[38:13] - Mary Fran encourages an exercise to gather a group of friends and write an introduction or a statement, in the hopes that we will begin to regard ourselves the way our friends regard us.

[41:47] - When we start letting some stuff go and refine what we want our space to look like, we can redefine what we want our lives to look like. Releasing some of the stuff in our lives can allow a great amount of growth moving forward. This holds true for material possessions as well as emotional baggage that can weigh us down.

[47:04] - The way we live our lives now is different - pursuing experiences is becoming more important than pursuing material goods. And we do acquire stuff, we use it!

[51:57] - We should strive to define ourselves on the basis of who we want to be, no matter our age or place in life. It all begins in the “six inches between your ears.” Be intentional in your self-talk.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

The Woman’s Book of Dirty Words - Mary Fran Bontempo

The Upside of Your Dark Side - Todd Kashdan and Robert Biswas-Diener

The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up - Marie Kondo

Episode 20 with Jennifer Boykin

Episode 15 with Lucy Pearce

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Today’s episode is a requested reading of a previously published post on Productive Flourishing named “Shake It, Don’t Break It.” The key idea from this post is that you can walk to edge of the known world you see, and shake things up without completely breaking up and burning down everything you know and have built before that.

Key Takeaways:

[0:53] - “We think too small, like the frog at the bottom of a well. He thinks the sky is only as big as the top of the well. If he surfaced, he would have an entirely different view.” - Mao Tse Tung.

[1:09] - Charlie uses the above quote to describe how we as individuals often don’t see the full picture - there is so much more out there that we don’t see.

[1:47] - If we limit ourselves to what we think we know or what we’ve seen, we are limiting ourselves from discovering new experiences. We sometimes have to step outside of our comfort zones to see what else there is to see.

[2:55] - This can be scary not only for us as individuals, but also for our loved ones. We need to consider them when we prepare to take our leap of faith, and how we can convince them that there’s something new worth discovering on the other side.

[3:30] - How can we shake up our world without breaking up our world? Remember that they’re not the same thing. Communicate why a particular change is needed to keep them along for the ride.

[4:10] - Charlie challenges us to think about how we can shake things up without leaving too many things behind.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

Productive Flourishing

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Angela joins Charlie Gilkey answer your questions and discuss how to determine what to delegate in your business, how to focus on high-value work, what low prices say about your products and services, and what to do when your getting off your schedules and productivity schedules.

Key Takeaways:

[1:15] - Open invitation to share your questions and suggestions for discussion on the Facebook group.

[2:08] - How do I determine how and what to delegate in my business? How do you decide what low-value work is worth doing at all, and how do you determine which stuff to put off until a later time?

[3:05] - Charlie suggests making a list to guide your decisions about delegations. Are you doing the same thing every week (routinely) that could be delegated to someone else? Consider projects versus routines.

[7:04] - There are different levels of delegation: tasks, projects, and responsibilities. Ultimately, the goal should be to move toward delegating responsibilities, rather than delegating tasks.

[12:09] - Routines and other frequent tasks would be ideal to delegate, while more involved projects may not be worth the time spent making sure someone else can do the project. Focus on what will allow you to do more high-value work.

[14:25] - What can you delegate that gets you ten hours a week back?

[15:18] - Framework for business endeavors: Cash flow, opportunity, visibility. Use these principles as a guide to prioritize business goals.

[17:55] - Creative Cage Match! When all of your projects are pitted against each other, which one will be the first one that won’t get done? The last one left standing remains high priority. Completed projects should help to set up other projects.

[20:54] - When you see something priced low, do you assume it’s going to be crappy? Or do you assume the person is racing to the bottom to compete with price instead of great content?

[21:39] - Don’t assume people won’t pay a higher price for your product or service. There’s always a segment of customers that are willing to pay a different price - based on those who are interested in quality of content.

[23:34] - There is very little relationship between price and value, although many people do make that correlation when considering their purchases. Make sure you’re not selling yourself short based on the quality of your product.

[25:29] - Consider the placebo effect of pricing: once they’ve paid a certain amount, people will value something a lot more because they paid that amount, not necessarily because of the value of the product.

[29:43] - Be confident in the value that you’re putting on the table.

[30:42] - When you feel you’re getting out of cycles that support you, or you’re off your schedule, what do you do? What can we think about to get ourselves back on track?

[31:54] - Charlie notices he’s off his cycle when he starts to feel in a slump productivity-wise. Contextualize your experience. If it is something that is happening over a prolonged period of time, you may need to re-evaluate something about your process to get back on track.

[35:10] - Reset! Once you diagnose what the problem is, think about what changes you can make to increase your productivity.

[38:52] - To ask more questions, join the Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group or directly e-mail Angela.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

Angela@productiveflourishing.com

Fancy Hands

Previous Q&A Podcasts:

Episode 90

Episode 104

Episode 107

Episode 112

The One Thing - Gary Keller

Three P’s of Pricing

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This episode is going to be a conversation between Angela and me about different learning styles and really getting to the bottom of how you learn, how you process and how you polish. The reason we’re going through this is because we’re both doing a lot of different creative things and we’ve found ourselves either stuck, or in the flow and we wanted to share how we’re working through that. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[0:50] Charlie explains how periodic struggles in his writing and learning ways to get unstuck have given rise to the idea for this podcast.

[3:21] The VARK modalities are brought up when talking about learning styles but these styles also apply to communication.

[4.30] If you ever you find yourself stuck learning something, try switching modalities - write/draw/move/talk it out.

[6:18] Charlie’s writing issue ended up being a great example of processing and expression style differences: he should have been drawing instead!

[9:45] This goes to show you that sometimes you get stuck because you’re trying to express your ideas in the wrong style.

[11:30] The three different ways to work through your creative process are conceptualisation, rough expression and polished expression.

[12:39] Each of these three stages may require you to use different styles: you may ideate visually, rough orally and so on and so forth.

[18:25] Sometimes, just switching modes will help you work through a jam and unstick your work.

[21:35] You also have to realise that working on your creations in one style or another as well as your level of mastery of that medium will not make it “less than”.

[26:05] When you’re not certain what style will best suit a particular activity, just try one, any one, it will help you to zero in on what works best.

[28:36] When you have mastered a medium, be even more careful because your own belief that this is your strength might prevent you trying different avenues.

[29:30] Our education system does not successfully foster different learning and communicative styles.

[30:27] People are happiest when they are expressing themselves and learning what style is natural for you will help you move in that direction.

Mentioned in This Episode:

The Small Business Life Cycle

Momentum Planning Method

VARK Learning Styles

Communication Matchmaking

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

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Remember MacGyver, the ingenious action-adventure hero from the 80’s who was able to do things like disarm bombs with a toothpick, swiss army knife and duct tape? MacGyver was a huge influence on me as a kid and his creator, Lee Zlotoff, joins me today to discuss the genesis of MacGyver, as well as the MacGyver secret—a simple process that can help you solve your toughest problems, because who wouldn’t want an inner MacGyver solving problems for them. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[1:00] Charlie introduces Mr. Zlotoff and his impressive television and film career as well as his philanthropic endeavours.

[2:54] MacGyver was imagined in opposition to a lot of his contemporaries — what if our guy had no gun, no gadgets, nothing!

[6:45] Mr. Zlotoff goes over his ongoing mission to bring MacGyver back through a television series and film but also in the form of The MacGyver Secret.

[8:50] The method covers management tools taken from MacGyver: avoid conflict, turn what you have into what you need and do it all with humour and humility.

[10:48] The issues coming up during this century are unlike any other concerns that humankind has faced before, the need for ingenuity is great.

[12:20] If MacGyver were recreated today, Lee would first make him a woman, then he would integrate her to the new technological context and finally, add a sense of global consciousness.

[14:46] The MacGyver Secret came about when Lee realised his best creative insight came out during specific routine activities, and he set out recreating the mental condition for this subconscious or “inner MacGyver” to appear.

[18:04] Everybody has an inner MacGyver and the method teaches you the three steps required to access that part of you in a reliable manner.

[19:44] Step one, write your question or problem down in longhand and pass it on to your inner MacGyver -- read it to yourself.

[20:29] Step two is to go on with your day! Let your inner MacGyver incubate the problem.

[22:01] Finally, after a few hours, start writing anything at all, and within 30 to 45 seconds the answers will flow from the tip of your pen.

[23:18] Activities that prevent the incubation process: watching television, reading, conversation (in any form—email, text, etc.), and playing high action video games.

[26:16] We are completely overloaded by information in this day and age and most of it will inhibit the incubation: you need a slightly physical, unimaginative task.

[29:04] The trickiest part is trusting that you do have an inner MacGyver and that it can give you answers!

[31:15] This method will work differently for personal emotional problems — mostly because you will need to ask more than once and the answers will take a little longer to come.

[33:50] This part of your mind will never shut down, it is a constant and is processing your daily experiences. Opening dialogue with that part of you will vastly enrich your creative and problem solving toolset.

[37:26] Lee Zlotoff’s closing challenge: start with the understanding that you have enormous resources at your disposal, you simply need to learn to open a dialogue with yourself.

Mentioned in This Episode:

The MacGyver Secret

MacGyver Global

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

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Today’s episode is a requested reading of a previously published post on Productive Flourishing, named “Your Art is For You”. So many creatives and change makers get stuck because they feel torn between the art they want to create and the art others want. And by art, I mean that special medicine that only you can create, which may not be fine art and painting, it could be something you do in the world besides that. You’ve got to start by making art for you first.

Key Takeaways:

[0:58] How many of your half done projects are stuck at the same spot? Did they halt when you started thinking about how to sell or share them?

[2:30] Creative types don’t create because they want to make money, they create because they need to.

[3:45] Yes, you do want to make money from your art, but it has to come from you first — you have to be interested and enjoy it.

[4:30] Now go back to your half done projects and label them as “not for sale” or “just for me” and see what happens.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Sarah Marie Lacey

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

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Today Angela joins me again for a jam and we’re talking about grief, transitions and health. This comes because we have gone through some death and grieving recently and it’s something that people ask Angela about a lot, and I do get questions sometimes, so we’re going to go ahead and do a jam about the subject. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[0:54] Charlie and Angela introduce the show with some personal insight on why they chose to address these often overlooked hard issues that do come up in life.

[3:09] Angela opens up on her recent loss and the gifts and blessings that came with that process of passing and the importance of opening up a discussion about grief and loss.

[5:07] Grief is often portrayed as a life shattering thing, and we rarely address smaller scale grief — a child going to college, or getting over who we thought we might be.

[7:58] The way each person experiences grief is unique and very personal, and what may be a “big G” experience for you, could be a “small g” experience for another.

[11:40] Because each person processes grief uniquely, the multitude of possible definitions is acknowledged even as a broader definition is offered.

[14:14] The feeling of loss, in all of its forms, will be positively correlated to the energy and meaning that we have vested those people, things and concepts that we feel we’ve lost.

[20:11] It’s important to note that it is perfectly normal if grief is never completely resolved, even if it is less frequent and painful, it may come up for years.

[25:04] Unhealthy grief happens and can be fueled, among other things, sudden loss, remorse, lack of inner resources or unhealthy boundaries in dealing with grief.

[35:50] Healthy versus unhealthy grieving could be defined by the act of processing versus not processing, the important thing is to stop and acknowledge the loss and begin a process.

[39:50] Having rituals is very important and affords us a space in which to grieve.

[41:21] Charlie and Angela touch on some ideas about what to do when you aren’t certain how to help someone when they are grieving.

[42:50] We wait for crises and emergencies to find out who our friends are, but if we did that when it wasn’t an emergency, we would be better equipped to help them.

[48:56] If someone grieving is able to ask for something specific, especially if they ask for time and space, it is important to respect it and to not take it personal.

[53:39] Grief also impacts teens and children and they need help and support in a most tangible way because they're not yet emotionally mature.

[56:00] Grief is a natural part of life — good and bad emotions are part of life — even if it isn’t easy.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Episode 75 with Kathy Kortes-Miller

Episode 58 with Christine Meekhof

The 5 Love Languages

Live Your Legend -- Scott Dinsmore

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

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After seeing how much more fun it was to have Angela with me on the Q&A’s, we’ve decided that it’s the new standard. Today we answer questions people send in about preventing overwhelm when goal-setting, dealing with a bad day and hiring someone when you don’t have the immediate cash to do so. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[1:22] Q1 from Cheryl is how to plan out your yearly goals without getting overwhelmed.

[1:58] Q1 Answer — You should aim to break down your annual goals into manageable chunks — quarterly objectives, monthly objectives, weekly projects and daily tasks.

[5:18] The place we get overwhelmed is at the daily task level, all of the small to-do’s that have trickled down from our overarching goals.

[6:25] Charlie touches on the importance of having a prioritized, manageable quantity of yearly goals to reach for.

[17:59] Q2 from Jeremy is about what you can do to get over a bad day.

[18:20] Q2 Answer — We tend not to take advantage of the freedom we have as entrepreneurs: sometimes you need to evaluate if there is anything you can do.

[22:45] When you get into a funk, move around some stagnant things but stay away from big decisions, email conversations and social media.

[25:05] Q3 from Corey is how to scale a team if you don’t have the immediate funds.

[25:40] Q3 Answer — You need a business audit to target the aspects of your workload that people could take on to free you to go out and generate more money.

[37:07] There is a measure of trust you need to have in your business growth potential, a fear of failure will hold you back.

[40:06] Every small business should look at financing options, you might need to leverage your revenue against a line of credit at some point.

[44:00] Thank you to Cheryl, Jeremy and Corey for contributing to this Q&A with their insightful Qs.

Mentioned in This Episode:

The Tuckman Model

12 Simple Ways to be Present

21 Ways to Quickly Short Circuit a Funk

The ONE thing by Gary Keller

The 2017 Momentum Planners Bundle

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

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Jonathan Fields joins me for a second time today to discuss his new book, How to Live a Good Life. The journey of writing this book has been a particularly interesting one, for the process required him to step into a very uncomfortable role at the same time as it required him to immerse himself in literature that he had dismissed. We discuss this evolution as well as the places lot of people struggle with living a good life. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[0:54] Charlie introduces Jonathan and his media venture project, the “Good Life Project”.

[3:45] The shift from writing about entrepreneurship and the creative process to a style more akin to personal development literature.

[6:40] The journey of writing was transformative in itself, both for the content and nature of the book as well as for the author.

[8:05] Wisdom and the capacity for reflexion really does seem to increase with each passing year.

[9:00] Jonathan admits to always having had a negative bias in terms of personal development literature.

[11:04] “How to Live a Good life” both embraces and diverges from the more theologically inclined books in the field.

[14:15] Jonathan explains that this may be his most personal book yet, the one that conveys his voice in the most intimate way.

[20:05] As are attorneys and philosophers, host and author are trained to use language to beguile and obscure things, a training that must be deconstructed to connect more authentically with the audience.

[21:05] At one point in your career it becomes more important to actually change people’s lives rather than change the world.

[24:41] Jonathan touches on how this book was many many years in the making and that the what he initially sold to his publisher was not “How to Live a Good Life”.

[27:20] Despite his initial reluctance for the genre, Jonathan had to read massive amounts of self help literature, to better position his own book and serve his audience.

[30:57] The difference between explanatory and exploratory styles of writing as well as the creative constraints required by certain genres are explored.

[34:00] Although genre structures and writing guidelines are generally followed, Jonathan expands on the importance of going his own way for this book.

[40:00] Peanuts!!

[40:29] Of the three buckets: vitality, connection and creativity, which tend to suffer first for creative types?

[44:45] The vitality bucket, as you age, may be the most challenging to replenish as your body’s needs evolve and change.

[49:19] Jonathan hints at some of the ideas he wants to delve into for his coming projects, including the relationship between money and happiness.

[54:50] Ultimately, all a guide can do is point to the different categories of things that have made people happy and encouraging you to try them and see.

[57:34] The challenge is issued to “Give Thirty”: in the next 24 hours, take 30 opportunities you have to give or to help somebody in less than 30 seconds.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert

The Good Life Project

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

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Today’s episode is a reading of a previously published post on Productive Flourishing named “What I’m Here to Do”. The post shares some stories that have informed why I show up in the world the way I do — I’m a bridge builder that helps people flourish. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[00:46] Follow Charlie as he remembers his arrival at the elite United-States Military Academy (West Point) and the leadership lesson he picked up from the yelling cadet.

[03:55] A dangerous search and rescue mission at boy scout camp sets up the tone for understanding what it is that Charlie does.

[12:08] How years of experience gathered through teaching philosophy, as a logistics officer in the army and as an entrepreneur, have given Charlie the broad understanding required to build effective bridges.

[14:25] If canned answers will not do for you, unconventional, tailor-made, human scale bridge building is what Productive Flourishing offers.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Sanebox.com/Giant

Productive Flourishing

West Point

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

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In today’s episode, Jason Van Orden joins me and shares what he’s learned about influence and helping others become top influencers in their field. Given that we often teach what we most need to learn, we also discuss what his work has revealed for him and the surprising tensions that have come up for him on his thought leadership journey. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[00:48] Charlie introduces Jason, summarizing his vast experience teaching and studying the psychology and strategies used by successful internet influencers.

[02:12] Charlie opens up the discussion with Jason about what influence actually is, and how it differs from manipulation.

[06:57] Because of hyper connectivity and information overload, people need to step up and become influencers in order to facilitate the organisation of knowledge in meaningful ways.

[12:06] How the increase in individual generated content on the internet (“noise”) forces people to find their own unique voice, and fosters creativity.

[18:12] What are some of the first steps to take when people want to come out as an influencer?

[22:00] The difference between analytically understanding someone and understanding them emotionally.

[27:30] Oftentimes, we teach about the things we really need to learn — Charlie asks Jason how teaching about influencing is helping him.

[31:03] The more experience you gain, the more challenges you take on and the more you end up dealing with the imposter syndrome — you need to cut yourself some slack and move through it.

[40:45] Jason shares how he was recently reminded of the importance of being engaged and continuing to innovate, even if change is intimidating.

[48:15] There is little talk about sufficiency in business — where your business meets your needs and doesn’t need to continuously grow and scale.

[50:20] What is the most surprising or unanticipated challenge Jason is currently facing?

[53:40] Remember that you need to be okay with the fact that there will not be a one size fits all answer and that you need a strategy that fits you.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Sanebox.com/Giant

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

Episode 14: Write, Publish, Repeat With Johnny B. Truant

Episode 5: Making Changes With Jonathan Fields

The Hero’s Journey by Joseph Campbell

Kant's Categorical Imperative

To Sell is Human by Daniel H. Pink

Louder than words by Todd Henry

The Fascination Advantage by Sally Hogshead

Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs

Bossypants by Tina Fey

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Angela joins me on today’s episode to learn how to align your goals and projects with your seasonal energy. This is a bit of a follow up from episode 102 with Megan Roop, based on questions readers have been asking us. But, it’s also prompted by the transition from summer to fall that we’re currently in, here in the Northern hemisphere. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[00:52] SaneBox will save you hours of time, and bring you peace of mind. Try it out with the link below!

[01:55] Charlie welcomes Angela to the show and introduces some fresh approaches being considered for the podcast.

[03:35] As we approach October, Charlie and Angela’s energies tend to shift. Today they address some relevant questions on how that looks to them and ways to acknowledge those changes.

[08:05] It’s key to make note of energy shifts within a team, as each member adds another variable to the energy dynamic. Talk to your team about it!

[08:45] Institutions and cultures have based schedules around these energy cycles for a long time, and for good reason.

[10:30] Creative Giant listener, Laura, asks Charlie to expand on the idea of living with the seasons as discussed on Episode 102 with Megan Roop.

[17:09] Angela notes that late August and early October is a great time to leverage Charlie’s higher energy and have him work more with the team.

[18:20] It’s important to consider our monthly cycles, including open conversations about women’s menstrual cycles, as well as recognizing the moon cycle’s impact on us.

[25:25] We tend to approach the way that we plan and make commitments as if we were robots — as if in a slice of time in the future we’re going to feel a certain way.

[28:45] For those way down on the “woo” spectrum, Charlie cuts the horsesh!t and gets down to the science!

[30:25] Nadia from the campfire sessions asks how Charlie and Angela personally prioritize activities, and especially schedule time for restorative activities.

[38:57] Angela touches on how she prepares for anniversaries of significant events that come about at certain times of the year.

[43:20] If this conversation is interesting to you, please let Charlie and Angela know and they’ll jam another session on our “seasons of life”.

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox/Giant

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

Episode 102: The Nourishing Nature of Being in Nature with Megan Roop

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Angela joins me for this Q&A to discuss how to form a success pack, how to brainstorm your goals, and the biggest leadership lesson I’ve learned in business. We made the switch to Angela joining me on this because it’s way more fun doing these with someone else and you’ll soon hear how much better the answers are. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[0:47] Clean up your Inbox with SaneBox!

[2:20] Q1 from Kat is on how to form a success pack.

[4:55] Q1 Answer — Make it super easy for your guide, have a clear project, have a clear goal, show why they’re relevant, and then be clear in what you’re asking them to do.

[14:56] Charlie’s tip on finding a guide for your success pack — make sure you have an aligned mission with that person, otherwise they shouldn’t even be your guide.

[15:32] How to find a peer for your success pack.

[20:08] Q2 from Shanna is on how to brainstorm your goals.

[22:17] Why mind mapping is a great tool, especially for creative people.

[25:51] Q2 Answer — Separate the creative mess from the analytical processing, and recognize it’s going to take multiple passes.

[32:14] Q3 from Patricia is on the biggest leadership lessons Charlie has learned in business.

[32:42] Q3 Answer — Biggest lesson Charlie has learned is how to be authentic and transparent with teammates and the value of giving positive feedback.

[38:36] How having a feelings-conscious business means you have to be ready to have a conflict-free business at the same time.

[42:24] Thank you to Kat, Shanna and Patricia for contributing to this Q&A with their insightful Qs.

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox.com

How to Write Brief Emails Without Being a Jerk

Mind Mapping by Tony Buzan

MindNode

MindMeister

How to Set SMART Goals

Asana

Hackpad

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Thanks so much for joining me on this quick episode. On this solo riff, I talk about why productivity gets a bad rap, and how instead of focusing on all the reasons why productivity is bunk, we’re better off focusing on finishing the stuff that matters. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[0:25] SaneBox can help sort your mail for you, so email can finally make sense again!

[1:28] Why productivity gets a bad rap these days!

[2:12] Why people feel torn between being productive & enjoying quality time with family.

[2:32] What it means to be a thriving person.

[3:03] What separates talented creatives from everybody else?

[3:39] All the reasons for why productivity is bunk are wrong. So, what is productivity really about?

[4:21] Let’s not focus on why others think productivity is bunk and focus instead on finishing the stuff that matters!

[5:03] Until next time, talk less about productivity, start finishing the stuff that matter, and stand tall!

Mentioned in This Episode:

www.SaneBox.com

Creative Giant Campfire Facebook Group

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In today’s episode, Arna Baartz joins me to share her journey, from a child of creative parents to an artist who teaches people to become more emotionally intelligent. Along the way, we discuss how she weaves in being a mother of 8 children, and her discovery and exploration of the art of Kundalini. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[0:48] SaneBox can help sort your mail for you, so email can finally make sense again!

[1:50] Find out more about Arna Baartz.

[3:19] How did growing up in an artistic family influence Arna’s artist career?

[9:56] Arna talks on the art of Kundalini, how she found her way to it, why she calls her art Kundalini, and other sources of her artistic expression.

[18:25] Arna embraces the mistakes that happen in her art―instead of trying to cover them up. She explains why!

[24:55] What is emotional intelligence to Arna?

[26:34] Why would we want to become more emotionally intelligent?

[31:42] How does Arna maintain her creative spirit while also running a business and raising 8 children?

[35:41] If Arna could go back to one moment in her creative career and do something different―what would that moment be & what would she do differently?

[37:20] What the one message Arna would like to leave the listeners with.

Mentioned in This Episode:

www.artofkundalini.com

www.arnabaartz.com

@ArnaBaartzArtist on Facebook

Episode 15: Cultivating Creativity During Motherhood with Lucy Pearce

Episode 36: Write Your Own Future with Ali Luke

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Thanks for joining us today! In this special episode of The Creative Giant Show, Charlie does a Q&A session with topics ranging from: triggers, the root of people’s resistance, and how to reconcile one’s innate nature with what seems to be an almost unnatural act of being an employee. Are you ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[00:54] SaneBox can help sort your mail for you, so email can finally make sense again!

[01:57] Nadia emailed and asked for some follow up from my article, The Guided Business Review. She asked, “What are the triggers to let you know you're facing one of these challenges? Triggers - can you explain with some examples?”

[04:56] The second question is about uprooting your own resistance. MeMuna asked, “Specifically, I’m interested in gaining clarity about the perspective you talk about in the quote from the article, ‘It’s hard to beat a monster who’s fueled by the very energy you’re trying to muster to beat it’.”

[08:08] The third question comes from another Nadia. “I’d like to know as an entrepreneur and Creative Giant, how does one reconcile one’s innate nature with what seems an almost unnatural act of being an employee, and working for someone else? Specifically, when this is a situation of one’s own choosing due to it leading to the fulfillment of a larger goal that does fit in with one’s nature. But, in the moment, on a day-to-day basis, seems to fly in the face of who you are and what you stand for.”

[12:10] To have your questions appear on the next Q&A, email us at support@productiveflourishing.com!

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox.com/Giant

ProductiveFlourishing.com/guided-business-review/

ProductiveFlourishing.com/are-you-the-root-of-your-own-resistance/

Man’s Search for Meaning

Email: support@productiveflourishing.com

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Srinivas Rao returns to The Creative Giant Show to jam about his new book, Unmistakeable: Why Only Is Better Than Best. We dive right in and discuss how ‘only’ isn’t enough, how the myth of easy creativity keeps us from doing our unmistakeable work, and the neurotic creative process the Unmistakeable Team goes through to ship their work. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[00:52] SaneBox can save you hours of time by sorting your email for you!

[01:55] Introduction to Charlie’s guest, Srinivas Rao.

[03:05] There are two main drivers from Unmistakeable - Srinivas unpacks these concepts.

[05:45] Ask yourself, “What is the emotional response that I’m trying to elicit from an audience?”

[07:00] We’re at an inflection point in our history where we have the ability to approach things as artists, and be more expressed and personal in what we create.

[07:30] There’s an odd paradox - the barrier is so low, yet the bar is so high.

[09:10] What motivates folks that don’t need to work to keep working?

[11:58] How many days should you invest in something before you should quit?

[13:02] At first we make our habits, and then our habits make us.

[13:18] What is meant by deliberate practice?

[17:20] It’s not that hard to be third string.

[19:30] Srinivas walks us through his personal and company’s creative processes.

[24:15] The secret to winning every time is to calculate expectations and exceed them.

[25:49] Frequency is a key to becoming unmistakable. How does Srinivas thread frequency and quality into his process?

[28:00] Which principles from the book does Srinivas find most challenging to practice?

[31:39] Srinivas shares his hardest challenges of writing long-form content while writing the new book.

[36:03] What is the one thing that Srinivas wants listeners to take away?

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox.com/Giant

Unmistakable Creative

Episode #3 with Seth Godin

Leave a rating for the show!

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Megan Roop joins Charlie today to talk about how quiet adventures helped her find herself battling the pursuit of being perfect. Along the way, she’s woven her experience with the Peace Corps, selling outdoor equipment, teaching yoga, and helping people overcome eating disorders, into a unique body of work. Listen in as we discuss the nourishing nature of being in nature, and how honoring the seasons helps you honor your changing nature.

Key Takeaways:

00:58 SaneBox advertisement.

02:00 Who is Megan Roop and what is Quiet Adventures?

02:55 Megan shares her path to starting the company, and how she came to reconcile seemingly disparate ideas of finance and personal growth into a culmination of activities that work for a greater good.

09:29 For many years, Megan devoted her energy to achieving “perfection” as a woman, that led to struggling with an eating disorder and eventual burnout. She shares how that weaves into her current endeavors.

11:11 When did Megan recognize the socialization of women was truly impacting her personally?

13:56 Just because society tells us there’s a way to be living life doesn’t mean that it’s going to work for you. Charlie and Megan elaborate.

16:05 What are some of the ways Megan has worked with women getting clear on what they’re willing to accept, and what they need to build a boundary around?

20:00 When women strip away the nonessentials, and get to the core of who the are, they start to see they do have gifts and they have a lot to give.

21:00 What tends to happen when out in nature that helps women connect with themselves? How does connecting to the seasons help one seeing the changing nature in life?

24:15 Women and creatives have internal seasonal changes frequently, and embracing that can make life easier to navigate.

27:36 What are some of the small ways people can be more intentional about their connection to nature?

30:04 Charlie opens a dialogue on the intersection of community and nature.

31:30 The Upside of Your Darkside suggests we have a comfort addiction. Do humans deeply bond over comfort as they do in times of struggle?

34:28 Megan shares a story of a moment when she realized she was in the right place, doing the right thing.

37:30 Contrastly, Charlie asks for a negative, pivotal moment on Megan’s journey.

39:20 What is Megan’s most unanticipated challenge currently?

41:00 What is the big takeaway Megan wants people to remember?

42:00 For more great info on connecting with nature, check out Episode #80 Reclaiming Wild Men with Jonathan Mead and #15 with Cultivating Creativity During Motherhood with Lucy Pearce

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox.com/Giant

Quiet Adventures

From Wood to Water

The Upside of Your Darkside

Episode 80: Reclaiming Wild Men with Jonathan Mead

Episode 15: Cultivating Creativity During Motherhood with Lucy Pearce

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In this special edition of The Creative Giant Show, Charlie reads from the Productive Flourishing blog post, Get Up and Take Care of Your People. This gripping story tells of how a combat experience in the military revealed to him both parallels and valuable lessons in leadership, which apply today in the battleground of business.

Key Takeaways:

[00:51] SaneBox™ Email Management‎ advertisement.

[01:32] Visit SaneBox.com/Giant for $25 credit on top of the 2 week free trial!

[01:52] Charlie reads his popular blog post, Get Up and Take Care of your People.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Offer: SaneBox/Giant

Blog: Get Up and Take Care of Your People

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The tables are turned in this episode, as Andrea J. Lee puts me in the spotlight. The questionnaire becomes the questioned. This one is coming right after I started sharing more of my thoughts on race, identity, equality and justice. So, a good bit of the conversation focuses on how we might show up as our full selves in our work. If you find yourself at a loss for how to engage with the world, while still doing your work, you might find some useful ideas in here. And yes, it’s really weird to create the intro for your own interview - I’m just saying, we live in interesting times! Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[1:03] Thank you to SaneBox.com for sponsoring episode #100.

[2:06] Charlie introduces Andrea J. Lee, who interviews him on this episode.

[3:01] Andrea joined us on episode #91, which resulted in her volunteering to this reverse podcast interview.

[4:24] What does it mean to be A Creative Giant, in the times we are in?

[7:59] Charlie shares his internal processes and the idea of creative constipation.

[10:36] The external and internal outcomes of the discourse Charlie is creating around social change.

[15:31] Charlie’s social media responses indicate he has touched a nerve on how to have discourse.

[16:26] How lack of dialogue gets us in no-win positions.

[19:32] The discourse about discourse is one of the most opaque things we have. How is Charlie’s background as a soldier influencing his approach?

[23:47] There are the harms we cause by doing things, and there are the harms we cause by not doing things.

[27:16] The fundamental and weird aspects of Humanity.

[29:23] Getting stuck in epic goals.

[32:11] What does Charlie think about the Language Police?

[40:51] How do we expand these great ideas? How do we go ‘there’?

[46:55] How to lean into gathering, rather than isolating; and how to flourish in creative partnerships.

[52:55] Charlie’s final thoughts on this episode’s topic!

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox.com/Giant

www.facebook.com/groups/PFCampfire/

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Whether we’re content creators, managers, leaders or customer service reps, we’re all in the teaching business. Breanne Dyck joins me again, to continue the conversation about making better learning experiences that work for our learners and work for us. Hint - it’s not about the content.

A quick plug here - come join us at The Creative Giant Campfire, our free Facebook group. We’ll be having conversations about podcast episodes there as well as other micro-post prompts, and the occasional Facebook Live Broadcast. You can find it by searching “creative giant campfire” on Facebook. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[1:04] Thank you to SaneBox.com for sponsoring episode #99.

[2:04] Breanne joined us on episode #30, which is definitely worth listening to.

[4:53] Let’s talk Before and After Infobesity [aka information overload].

[11:57] Breanne is experimenting with Facebook Live right now & shares tips on how to get people to take action after a video.

[15:12] Breanne explains Bloom’s Taxonomy of Learning.

[16:48] How to get into that higher level learning zone in the quick slices of time we have available.

[24:31] It’s not about content, it’s about context and what you’re gonna do within that context.

[29:27] What’s the next wave in the online space?

[35:20] Do’s & don’ts of the current state of learning. Breanne shares many insightful tips here.

[46:47] Let’s talk about problems consultants run into and transmedia content production.

[55:18] Pick up a game, teach it to someone & have fun, because it’s the best vehicle for learning how to make learning work.

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox.com/Giant

mnibconsulting.com

Breanne Dyck on The Creative Giant Episode #30

Bloom’s taxonomy

How the World Sees You by Sally Hogshead

Million Dollar Consulting by Alan Weiss

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In this episode, Lisa Robbin Young and I discuss the blog post she wrote for Productive Flourishing on the 3 Types of Creative Entrepreneurs. Even if you don’t consider yourself creative or an entrepreneur, this is worth the listen because we’re really talking about different modes of creativity and why it’s important to lean into the kind of creative that you are. And by the way, if you’re human, you are creative. There’s also a discussion happening on this in our free Facebook group, The Creative Giant Campfire. Come join us there if you’d like to stand tall together with other Creative Giants. You can find it by searching creative giant campfire on Facebook. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[1:07] Thank you to SaneBox.com for sponsoring episode #98.

[2:13] Find out more about Lisa Robbin Young, founder of Ark Entertainment Media, a business incubator for creative entrepreneurs.

[3:45] Lisa shares how creating her business emerged from a personal business problem.

[8:20] There are 3 primary creative types: chaotic, linear and fusion; and then there are the cusp types.

[10:10] Take Lisa’s quiz - What’s Your Creative Freedom Entrepreneur Type? Chaotic, Fusion, or Linear?

[15:43] How to notice your creative mode switching and be aware of the support you need when you’re doing your creative projects.

[18:53] Discover the strengths and disadvantages of each creative type - linear, chaotic and fusion.

[30:18] The power of knowing, embracing and leaning into your creative type along the spectrum.

[36:33] What would Lisa say to someone who comes to her with the problem of being a certain creative type and feeling they’re in the wrong career?

[42:47] What’s the main reason Lisa calls this “the creative entrepreneur spectrum”?

[44:07] Lisa’s challenge on the next step to take after listening to this episode.

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox.com/Giant

The Secret Watch by Lisa Robbin Young

The Fine Line by Lisa Robbin Young

A Whole New Mind by Daniel Pink

Take Lisa’s Quiz: What’s Your Creative Freedom Entrepreneur Type? Chaotic, Fusion, or Linear?

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A common growing pain for Creative Giants is the pressure to be just one thing in the world. To just be a doctor or a writer or a programmer or CO or whatever it is. The truth of it is that we’re all multi-dimensional, so resisting that only leads to us living less rich lives. Dusti Arab joins me today to share her Creative Giant journey and how she’s weaving it all together.

A quick plug here, a quick plug - we just opened up the Creative Giant Campfire, our free Facebook Group. We’ll be having conversations about podcast episodes at the campfire, so come join us there if you’d like to stand tall together with other Creative Giants. You can find it by searching “Creative Giant Campfire” on Facebook. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[1:14] Thank you to SaneBox.com for sponsoring episode #97.

[2:16] Learn more about Dusti Arab, the CEO and Creative Director of thinkCHARM.

[4:29] How Dusti got started in Copywriting and secured her first gig.

[7:50] The difference between copywriting and ghostwriting.

[12:55] Dusti talks Princess Parties.

[16:54] Dusti shares her brand story.

[20:25] Let’s talk 3-5 years from now.

[23:34] People put too much pressure on themselves to meet these arbitrary deadlines.

[25:49] Dusti’s biggest and most unanticipated challenges.

[31:19] Changing gears is OK!

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox.com/Giant

Creative Giant Campfire on Facebook

thinkCHARM

Dusti Arab

@dustiarab on Instagram

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Peter Droppers said, the only things that evolve by themselves in an organization are disorder, friction, and malperformance. In a similar vein, it seems that businesses and organizations naturally tilt towards complexity, much to the dismay and frustration of the people and those who interact with them. You can’t beat complexity with more complexity. Ken Segall joins me today to share how leaders have to think simple to counteract complexity in their organizations. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[1:03] Learn more about Ken Segall, author of The New York Times bestseller Insanely Simple and the new sequel, Think Simple.

[3:14] What inspired the creation of Think Simple following Insanely Simple?

[6:21] What is it about simplicity that makes it so hard for organizations to stick with or cling to?

[10:23] Why simple solutions or simple creative efforts are typically overlooked.

[15:45] What has surprised Ken about big companies and simplification?

[21:08] Hear about Ken’s experience with writing Think Simple.

[30:03] Ken shares his view on what made Steve Jobs special.

[31:58] The 85% solution for beating complexity.

[36:51] The one thing Ken wants listeners to remember about him and his body of work.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Ken Segall

Books by Ken Segall

• Think Simple
• Insanely Simple

Brian Hartzer, Westpac CEO and Huge Fan of Simplicity

Steve Jobs

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There are two myths about being a successful creative that get us into a lot of troub. One, that doing it by yourself is better and two, that having a creative partner would make life so much easier. It turns out that neither is true, at least for most people. Leah Heinz and Naz Murphy join me today to discuss how their uncomfortable friendship is the source of their personal and professional growth. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[0:52] Thank you to SaneBox.com for sponsoring episode #95.

[1:58] Charlie introduces Leah & Naz, co-founders of The Connection Effect.

[4:59] The story of how Leah & Naz started a business together.

[13:08] Realizing there are individual differences in the way one works in the world.

[24:08] Recognizing growth moments and overcoming challenging times.

[31:20] How to have a great business relationship and face the differences in any relationship.

[37:55] Reconciling your different money stories in a business partnership.

[44:33] The beauty of a creative partnership.

[49:17] Being outcome-focused and individual shifts in energy can be helpful with switches in responsibilities.

[57:56] Changing their brand name from The Ripple to The Connection Effect.

[63:59] Leah and Naz offer a key piece of advice on having a creative partnership that works.

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox.com/Giant

The Connection Effect

The Connection Effect on Facebook

Live Your Legend

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Today’s episode is a rerun of one of my favorite episodes, episode 3 with Seth Godin. We’re doing a rerun today for several reasons: 1) I wanted to share some of our past episodes, that were fantastic, with new listeners who may not have scrolled all the way to the bottom of the episode list to see this one; 2) I think it’s time for everyone to reconsider how they’re not picking themselves; and 3) I wanted to remind people who are thinking about putting their art out there, whether their art is a podcast, a blog post, a book, a new initiative at work, music, or whatever - that it always amounts to just putting it out there and then doing it again. We have come a long way with The Creative Giant Show, so much so that the audio and my discomfort in this episode makes me cringe, but the chief thing is that we started and I’m so grateful for everyone for sticking with us. As always, I hope the content and the example help you pick yourself and get your art out there. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[1:37] Thank you to SaneBox.com for sponsoring episode #94.

[2:54] Find out the story behind episode 3 with Charlie’s mentor from afar, and long-time hero Seth Godin.

[8:32] How to Pick yourself.

[16:17] Seth asks - “What are you going to do tomorrow that’s going to make you more connected to what you’re doing today?”

[18:14] What it takes to be a genius.

[19:51] What was it about The Icarus Deception that scared Seth?

[24:50] Why people are afraid of being successful.

[30:06] Seth believes one way we get in trouble is by misunderstanding success.

[32:47] How to use a given feeling to motivate yourself.

[35:35] Seth’s final words of wisdom.

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox.com/Giant

Seth Godin

TED Talk by Elizabeth Gilbert: Your elusive creative genius

Books by Seth Godin

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While a lot of career paths aren’t linear, Creative Giants in particular often seem to have dramatically, nonlinear career progressions. One of the reasons for this is that we’re often actually pursuing multiple passions or growth edges at once. Kristoffer Carter (K.C.) joins me today to share his journey from a corporate sales guy to creative powerhouse and back to a corporate catalyst for mindfulness. It’s a wild journey but that’s a bit par for the course with K.C. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[0:57] Thank you to SaneBox.com for sponsoring episode #93.

[1:58] Who is Kristoffer Carter (aka K.C.)?

[4:42] How did Charlie challenge K.C. when he thought he had to quit his job at the Good Life Project?

[8:48] What is Kriya Yoga and how has it helped K.C. focus on the good?

[11:53] K.C. on his spiritual practice, his meditation teaching, cumulative deposit and compounding return.

[15:18] K.C. talks about having had 3 jobs and realizing that he doesn’t need to be “all these things to all these people.”

[19:28] How does K.C. negotiate those over-reaches?

[21:52] Time to go on a spiritual sabbatical! K.C. shares the story.

[24:50] K.C. shares a little bit about the time he took a sabbatical.

[29:45] If he only had to choose one of the 3 core programs from the Camelot Culture Group, which one would K.C. focus on and why?

[32:16] What about what K.C. is going through right now most terrifies or challenges him?

[34:12] Looking back, what did K.C. think was going to be really hard that turned out not be as difficult as he thought it would be?

[35:37] K.C.’s main message from this episode.

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox.com/Giant

Good Life Project

Centro

This Epic Life

Camelot Culture Group

Autobiography of a Yogi by P. Yogananda

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The pursuit of happiness is often tied to the acquisition of more stuff. But we should instead be asking how the stuff in our lives prevents us from being happy, creative and connected to the ones we love. Courtney Carver, from bemorewithless.com, joins me to discuss how simplicity and minimalism is a path to love and freedom. It’s not about letting go but getting back. She also prompts me into reefing about why we need more diversity in the productivity and minimalist spaces. So you might find that interesting if you’ve ever wondered about it. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[1:06] Thank you to SaneBox.com for sponsoring episode #92.

[2:10] Who is Courtney Carver?

[3:42] How did Courtney’s journey toward simplicity and minimalism work for her?

[6:03] What is meant by minimalism & simplicity in the context of today’s discussion?

[9:49] Project 333 is a minimalist fashion challenge. Courtney elaborates.

[16:40] “If I let all of that go, then who am I?” is a scary question that can surface when you dig deep enough.

[21:19] Courtney believes that simplicity is the way back to love.

[23:41] What to do when you can’t buy yourself out of your suffering.

[30:27] Women vs. men in the simplicity/minimalism space.

[33:22] Women vs. men in the productivity space - is there a problem?

[40:03] Minimalism is not about giving up, it’s about getting back! There is a lot of ‘getting rid of things’ but it’s to make space for the things that you care about.

[43:28] Looking for that inspiration to spark the start of your minimalist journey and wondering where to start?

[46:10] Courtney’s one message for listeners: simplicity will bring you back to love if you give it a chance.

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox.com/Giant

Be More With Less

Be More With Less on Facebook

Courneycarver.com

Project 333

The Life Changing Magic of Tidying UP, Book by Marie Kondo

The More of Less, Book by Joshua Becker

Colin Wright

Tammy Strobel

Minimalist.com

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It’s easy for coaches to not walk their talk. Especially, since we are so focused on transformation and transitions. While the outcome of transformations and transitions are great, the process isn't comfortable for anyone, including the coaches who facilitate said growth. Andrea Lee joins me today to share her transition from one of the top pioneering business coaches to a blank_er_ slate as a humanistic writer. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[1:00] Thank you to SaneBox for sponsoring episode #91.

[2:07] Who is Andrea Lee?

[5:49] Back to 1998 and how Andrea’s career transpired.

[8:40] What’s changed in the coaching world from the client’s perspective? Andrea weighs in on the pros & cons.

[10:37] Back to 1998 and what happened after Andrea got hired as a customer service rep.

[12:15] What is the life time membership model created by Thomas Leonard? What happened to this lifetime membership after his passing?

[15:11] One of Andrea’s main takeaways after Thomas’s passing is that every day counts.

[17:37] How did Thomas’s passing propel her towards becoming a thought leader?

[20:23] What about sabbaticals between Multiple Streams and Thought Partners?

[24:43] Andrea’s piercing thoughts right now!

[28:10] Andrea speaks to the tension that she describes as “a big giant co-dependence mess”.

[33:54] A discussion on resetting relationship dynamics and resetting our own understanding of how we relate to the world.

[38:45] Andrea feels very clean and settled about her essence.

[40:30] Have you read “In The Name of Identify” by Amin Maalouf?

[44:16] How is Andrea’s Rubik’s cube spinning for her right now?

[47:16] Andrea is writing something else right now but it’s very raw at the moment. She shares more about this new work.

[51:49] What’s the most unanticipated challenge Andrea is facing right now?

[54:06] Andrea’s main message is to be brave and listen within.

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox.com/Giant

Thomas Leonard

Multiple Streams of Coaching Income, Book by Andrea J. Lee

Tara Gentile’s Quiet Power Strategy

In The Name of Identity, Book by Amin Maalouf

We Need to Talk by Andrea J. Lee

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This is our first Q & A episode and I’m excited about it. In today’s episode I discuss: 1) creative ways to use the results from your productivity heat map, 2) how I suggest people approach heat mapping when their schedule is largely determined by somebody else, and 3) what tools I use for blogging. At the end of the episode I’ll let you know a few of the other questions I’m going to be answering in the next Q & A so keep your ears open for that. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[0:56] Thank you to SaneBox.com for sponsoring episode #90.

[2:00] What’s going on with the format of the show?

[6:11] Question #1 from Jennifer - What are some creative ways to use the results from your productivity heat map?

[7:59] Think about the 4 different types of blocks you might have throughout your day - Creative, Social or Service, Admin, and Recovery.

[9:05] What’s the schedule sorting game and when should you play it?

[10:35] Basically, you plan your day based upon the different blocks & you use those blocks very seriously.

[16:30] Question #2 from Laura - How does Charlie suggest to approach heat mapping when your schedule is largely determined by somebody else?

[18:32] Charlie's first tip is to un-schedule a day from your schedule.

[20:22] Charlie’s second tip is to separate what’s on your schedule with how you actually feel.

[22:25] Bottom line on what to do when you don’t have autonomy over your schedule? Listen in for the communication piece you can steal and use with your workplace.

[25:23] Question #3 from Patricia - What tools does Charlie use for blogging?

[26:22] Writing tools: TextMate or Lightroom, then copied them into WordPress.

[28:17] Charlie uses an Idea Garden to capture blog post ideas.

[29:05] Another tool is the Blog Post Calendar which you can download for free.

[30:04] Charlie uses Jetpack by WordPress and Google Analytics to keep track of stats.

[31:21] Charlie catalogs posts mostly by memory.

[32:05] Social media tools: The native platforms like Twitter, Facebook, then Buffer and now Edgar.

[33:25] What about refreshing and recycling social media content?

[37:36] A recap of the tools: Google Docs, Jetpack for WordPress Stats or Google Analytics, Blog Post Calendar, Edgar, and Rainmaker.

[38:11] Big thanks to Jennifer Layton, Laura Hackle and Patricia Bravo for their great questions.

[38:21] Coming up on the next Q & A: Examples of triggers & why they matter, how Charlie worked through with what needed to happen with the Live Your Legend transition, and maybe one of your questions which you can email to charlie@prductiveflourishing.com.

[38:39] If you liked this episode or the show in general, please leave a review or rating on iTunes to help us reach more people. Go to bit.ly/creativegiantshowfaq for a walkthrough on how to do this!

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox.com/Giant

@CharlieGilkey on Twitter

Episode 47: The Future of the Creative Giant Show

Get more done in less time by heat mapping your productivity

Idea Garden

The Blog Post Planner and Calendar

TextMate

Lightroom

WordPress

Markdown

Jetpack for WordPress

Google Docs

WordPress Stats

Google Analytics

Edgar

Rainmaker

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Think about what comes to mind when I ask you to think about a marketer or sales person. Be honest! Did you think of a smart, soft spoken, insightful woman? If not, I hope today’s episode changes that for you. Sonia Simone is a marketing trend setter and founding partner of Rainmaker Digital, formerly Copyblogger Media. Throughout our conversation, she reveals how a risk averse, introverted and insanely curious writer became one of the leading voices in digital marketing today. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[1:03] Thank you to SaneBox.com for sponsoring episode #89.

[2:17] Charlie introduces Sonia and her line of work.

[4:22] What is it about marketing that got Sonia involved?

[6:34] There is an invisible aspect of digital marketing. Sonia explains.

[8:01] Sonia has always approached marketing from the content marketing perspective, even before there was a word for it.

[10:25] Marketing and selling are learnable skill sets; you don’t need to be born with them.

[12:29] Every human being on this planet has a certain set of assets and a certain set of constraints.

[15:28] Barriers are a lot easier to step over in digital platforms.

[18:39] Sonia walks us through her journey from corporate to Copyblogger.

[25:22] Sonia speaks on folks out there that sell business advice based on the fast outliers.

[28:58] Sonia likes Chris Gilbo’s flavor of entrepreneur teaching because it includes a big minimalist component.

[32:06] Sonia talks on Clay Collins’ vision of being a business owner.

[34:10] “What’s the shortest line between me and a cheque?” - Naomi Dunford

[36:40] Internet Marketing for Smart People vs. Nice People!!

[39:49] Sonia has been highly focused on values lately.

[44:10] Naomi writes 85% of the things she says in her podcast Confessions of a Pink-Haired Marketer, which she has been her primary focus lately.

[48:34] What’s the most unanticipated challenge Sonia is currently facing?

[52:05] Sonia’s final words of advice: “Be honest about your own set of Legos and don’t try to build somebody else’s thing.”

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox.com/Giant

www.copyblogger.com

Rainmaker Digital

Remarkable Communication

Clay Collins

Naomi Dunford

Internet Marketing for Smart People

Confessions of a Pink-Haired Marketer Podcast

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This is a jam between Angel and I on what happens when you go against your daily rhythms and having awareness and synchronicity with your natural biorhythms. We also chat about creative energy, adapting to schedule shifts, peak creative times, “screen sucking”, schedule optimization, and more. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[0:32] Thank you to SaneBox.com for sponsoring episode #88.

[1:40] What’s been going on since Angela and Charlie’s last podcast?

[3:33] What are biorhythms?

[5:03] Spring is in the air and there is a lot of shift in people’s creative energy.

[6:11] Charlie has shifted his native biorhythm to meeting in the mornings and creating in the afternoons. How is this new schedule change working for him?

[7:40] What are Angela’s peak creative times?

[8:32] This industrial biorhythms a lot of us are on is actually not natural in some ways.

[11:11] If Charlie already knew what his creative peak times were, why did he change it?

[14:15] The difference between theory and practice is that in theory there’s no difference between theory and practice!

[19:46] Angela weighs in on how technology and modernity has changed our natural biorhythms. How does this relate to habit changes?

[21:56] Charlie goes on a social media rant as it relates to “screen sucking”.

[25:24] Charlie knows when he’s “screen sucking” but he stops and asks if what he is doing is nourishing.

[27:34] Charlie’s new schedule has resulted in him getting a lot more done in the last couple of weeks but it’s not sustainable.

[30:38] When did Charlie know his schedule change was not going to be sustainable in the long term.

[36:20] The point Charlie wants to drive home is to pay attention to what parts of your schedule are working for you and what aren’t.

[36:34] Angela and Charlie discuss the challenges women face with regards to their biorhythms and how they internalize set expectations.

[40:11] What’s your natural biorhythm? Lean in to that!

[40:44] How can you plan and negotiate your day so that you’re really tapping into the energy when it’s best for you, and not doing things at the wrong time.

[40:59] What are the signals that you use to gauge whether you’re energetically on point?

[41:27] What permission will you give yourself to explore creating a schedule that’s more nourishing for you?

[42:07] Angela’s gentle reminder: practice compassion with yourself while you’re going through these changes.

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox.com/Giant

Heat Mapping Your Productivity Charlie Gilkey

The Night Owl Manifesto by Mike Vardy

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As uncomfortable as it is to make big changes in life no matter what those changes are, fear kicks into overdrive when you’re changing great careers and great jobs. Michelle Bushneff joins me today to share her purpose-filled pioneering journey from software companies to Athleta to her own consultancy and now back to more full-time positions. We explore the difference between passion and purpose, second acts and the changing realities of being a woman in today’s business world. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[1:03] Charlie tells us a little bit about Michelle Bushneff.

[3:52] Which two common threads have bound all of Michelle’s different projects?

[6:13] Michelle has played an important role in using emerging media & technologies to give women a voice, but also to serve women better.

[7:00] Being a part of helping to shift dynamics in the business world in terms of women & leadership roles.

[8:03] What are some of the biggest shifts Michelle has seen in terms of new and emerging opportunities for women?

[11:56] Social media as a personal publishing platform has had such a huge impact for women.

[13:31] The distinction between passion and purpose.

[17:14] What is Michelle passionate about and what is the purpose behind it for her?

[18:37] How did she know it was fear that was holding her back in her career? How does the fear come into play for her?

[21:38] Michelle is not a fan of her awful commute but it’s OK because where she’s going serves her purpose.

[24:55] What elements in Michelle’s work have been out of her passion or purpose box?

[27:48] Michelle talks on her journey of taking a leap from Athleta to consulting to now working full-time.

[32:55] There are always tradeoffs in life!

[33:52] Figuring out how there was a better way to go about fulfilling her purpose.

[36:52] Michelle shares advice on staying real.

[40:49] Michelle shares how all the inspiration out there has infused her with inspiration.

[43:08] Having humility and a lifelong learner mindset and embracing it.

[45:46] The more diversity you can bring into an environment the more potential there is for something exceptional to happen.

[46:31] What is the most unanticipated challenge Michelle is currently facing?

[48:29] Michelle wants people to stay purpose-focused and not be afraid to take some leaps.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Athleta

Michelle Bushneff on LinkedIn

@BIGthinkster on Twitter

www.bigthinkster.com

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A lot of our decisions revolve around enhancing our own freedom. The challenge is that there are two distinct kinds of freedom that are often in tension and lead us to making decisions that keep us from flourishing and being our best selves in the world. In today’s solo riff, I’m going to explore the two concepts of freedom and how they lead to different outcomes.

Key Takeaways:

[0:49] Thank you to SaneBox.com for sponsoring episode #86.

[1:50] Have you ever made a choice to increase your freedom only to figure out you were no happier afterwards?

[1:56] Or have you ever found you’ve been the most happy during times in which you were the least free?

[2:02] If so, you’ve experienced the reality of there being two kinds of freedom: Negative freedom and positive freedom.

[2:54] The two concepts of freedom often hang in tension with one another experientially.

[3:14] The distinction between the two concepts of freedom becomes even more tense for those of us who are service-focused & enjoy working in groups. But how?

[4:58] Entrepreneurship and having a small business gives you the option to choose which interferences and inconveniences you want to face.

[6:45] The distinction between positive and negative freedom is not new. In 1958, Isaiah Berlinshared a philosophical lecture called Two concepts of Liberty.

[9:22] What constraints will give you the most positive freedom? What do positive freedom and negative freedom each gives us?

[9:56] Freedom shares the same relationships with constraints as creativity does with structure.

[11:10] Picking a business strategy or model and sticking with it enables more positive freedom for your business.

[11:32] A better question than “How can I be free?” is “What conditions enable me to thrive and what do I need to do to get them in place?”

Mentioned in This Episode:

www.sanebox.com/Giant

Two Concepts of Liberty by Isaiah Berlin

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Each of us wears a different mask every day, whether that mask is being a mother, a creative person, a brother or a manger. Knowing when we’re wearing the right one and which ones not to reveal, is key to our success and happiness. Dr. Atira Charles joins me today to jam about how the mask we wear relates to authenticity, vulnerability, productivity and stress. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[0:54] Charlie tells us a little bit about Dr. Atira Charles.

[2:19] Dr. Charles speaks on wearing many different masks in life and how that relates to our sense of identity.

[4:23] There are different ways to wear a mask and we can be or not be aware of whether we’re wearing one or which one we’re wearing.

[5:01] Dr. Charles gives an example to explain what she means by “a mask” and how that can set different expectations.

[6:41] People are so reactive that we’re not pro-active.

[7:46] We’re either self-defined or auto-defined. Dr. Charles explains the difference.

[9:54] Identity can be a source of affirmation and pride or it can be a source of threat. But different identities can exist at the same time.

[14:14] How can we analyze the mask we are wearing and determine if it’s the right one for us at a given time?

[19:06] There is a fine balance between transparency and vulnerability.

[23:48] What are the most valuable and emotionally charged masks we can wear?

[28:47] Masks are not something to hide and conceal. It’s about when to wear which ones.

[29:52] What are the emotional and psychological consequences of having a creative thirst that’s never quenched?

[33:31] Charlie and Dr. Charles discuss instant gratification and how it relates to self-identity.

[37:26] In any situation certain identities we have, no matter what space we’re in, are who we are. What are your unwavering self-identities?

[39:20] How can a manufactured urgency for insatiability come from external pressures?

[41:05] Have peace about where your stage is because all comparisons are not equal.

[44:40] What’s the most unanticipated challenge Dr. Charles is currently facing?

[46:41] The one thing Dr. Charles wants everyone to take away from this episode.

Mentioned in This Episode:

@DrAtiraCharles on Twitter

www.ourmasks.com

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Something we don’t talk about enough is that many entrepreneurs and small business owners realize being in that space isn’t necessarily right for them. Sometimes it’s about business models and market trends, and yet other times it has nothing to do with those external conditions. But given that being an entrepreneur or small business owner is a core way of understanding their place in the world, it can be hard to take the next right step for them without feeling shame, grief, frustration or anger. Laura Neff joins me today to share what she has learned as someone who stepped away from one small business she started and grew; and is potentially stepping away from her current one into something bigger and better. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[1:09] Thank you to SaneBox.com for sponsoring episode #84.

[2:13] Charlie tells us a little bit about Laura Neff.

[4:46] How did Laura get to the point of realizing she may not be going down the road that’s going to flourish her the best?

[7:58] Charlie loves teams and achieving goals in a team format.

[9:45] One of the #1 core values Laura has noticed people have in common is freedom.

[11:46] Charlie’s #1 rule for insight: whenever you come up with an ‘either/or’, realize that it’s a false dichotomy.

[13:57] What has Laura realized is so appealing about going back to a corporate structure?

[17:29] Why is it not so simple to know what you want to do? Laura explains.

[22:44] Laura believes in the next couple of years we’re going to see a bit of an ‘exitist’ from the solopreneur/entrepreneur online business space. Charlie agrees!

[26:21] Laura embraces the organic unfolding of what’s to come and not knowing what is next.

[31:51] Laura describes a mental image of the organic unfolding she speaks of.

[34:03] What is the one main message Laura wants listeners to take away?

[34:36] Laura’s challenge for listeners is to get real.

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox

www.lifeleadershipcentral.com

Two Concepts of Freedom by Charlie Gilkey

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Every one of us has our own unique set of challenges and negative beliefs that keep us from living life to the fullest. To thrive, we have to develop rituals, practices and methods that help us root out the negative thoughts and beliefs that are hurting our productivity, goals, health and relationships. Marc and Angel join me today to share the practices, tools and insights that helped them in their journey from newlyweds and trying circumstances to being recognized by Forbes as the creators of one of the most popular personal development blogs in the world. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[1:02] Charlie tells us a little bit about Marc and Angel Chernoff.

[3:24] Marc tells us about the early days in his and Angel’s journey.

[6:01] How did their blog, marcandangel.com, evolve?

[9:15] Marc talks on the shift in expectations in relation to the ‘hockey stick’ effect.

[10:48] What were some of the mindsets and limiting beliefs Marc and Angel struggled with?

[14:33] When you’re faced with two opportunities, always go with the one that scares you the most because that’s the one that you’re going to be able to grow with the most.

[18:27] A huge part about being grounded is simply, gratitude.

[19:14] Implementing very small rituals can help you make positive changes.

[20:31] You have to have a contingency plan. Always ask what’s the worst and best thing that can happen and be prepared for it.

[24:22] Back in 2006, Angel and Marc were faced with lots of tragedies. Angels talks on how they overcame some of those challenges.

[27:45] Marc speaks on some of the relationship challenges they faced.

[29:18] How do Angel and Marc keep things healthy and warm given the nature of their professional relationship?

[31:39] Journaling and self-enquiry are two major tools that Marc uses to work through his perfectionistic tendencies.

[35:14] Distractions and working on multiple things at once is something Angel has to work through.

[37:03] What’s the most powerful story they have told themselves and how was it created?

[41:30] Parenting has turned out to be the most unanticipated challenge for Angel and Marc.

[45:29] Don’t doubt yourself. You’re the most important person in your life.

Mentioned in This Episode:

www.marcandangel.com

1,000+ Little Things Happy Successful People Do Differently by Marc and Angel Chernoff

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All too often, exercise and movement are put in a different bucket of activities than those that count towards being productive. Unfortunately, that’s backwards. Exercise is a foundation for success, so focusing on our health and fitness is one of the most productive things we can do. Mike Goncalves joins me today to talk about the relationship between creativity, confidence, priorities, and exercise. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[0:56] Thank you to SaneBox.com for sponsoring episode 82 of The Creative Giant Show.

[2:00] Charlie tells us a little bit about Mike Goncalves.

[3:23] Mike believes exercising helps us to become more creative.

[5:25] When you’re at your best, everything else benefits, but we tend to prioritize ourselves last, rather than first.

[7:22] If you want to excel at any part of your life, you have to take up exercise, fitness, and healthy eating.

[9:30] How do we get past that feeling of not wanting to get up and start exercising?

[11:29] What can you do when you have ‘zero’ time for exercise?

[12:41] Email Mike to respond to his challenge. He answers all his emails personally.

[13:37] What 5 exercises can you do in 5 minutes? Try doing each one for a minute and shoot Mike an email to let him know how it felt.

[15:19] How does focusing on your own health and happiness inspire others?

[18:52] Motion Effects Emotion! Studies show over and over again that even a simple 15-20 min walk changes your confidence level and energy.

[20:54] What are some of Mike’s areas for self-improvement and growth?

[22:16] How does Mike work through all the "I have to’s"?

[23:28] What’s Mike’s biggest challenge right now and how is exercise helping him move through it?

[25:38] Mike identifies himself as the ‘fitness guy’ and that helps him do what needs to get done.

[27:45] Exercise is the foundation for success.

[30:26] A study found that one of the top reasons health resolutions don’t last is because we come out of the gate too fast, swinging too aggressively, so it’s not sustainable.

[31:37] Try doing these 5 exercises: jumping jacks, burpees, pushups, abdominal/bicycle, abdominal/plank.

[34:05] You have to focus on where you are and not where you think you should be.

[36:22] The one message Mike wants to leave us with.

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox

Mike’s Email: mike@thewellnessbucket.com

Mike Goncalves (@WellnessBucket) on Twitter

www.thewellnessbucket.com

Uncertainty by Jonathan Fields

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Jasmine Burton, an inspirational 24-year-old running a startup in Africa, hopes to improve women’s health via redesign of water, sanitation and hygiene infrastructure - sparking the foundation of Wish for Wash. In this episode, you’ll learn how a variety of waste management gaps exist despite how far the western world has advanced the human experience. This creates an odd disparity between knowing that billions of people defecate in buckets and bags, yet are using smartphones to WhatsApp message each other.

Jasmine speaks on the challenges of making the cost per unit to be under $20, and how to make it affordable to the low-income communities that need the product most.

Key Takeaways:

[00:10] According to the UN, 6 billion people have access to mobile phones. Yet, only 4.5 billion have access to working toilets.

[01:15] Jasmine’s senior design team won the InVenture competition for their design of an inexpensive mobile toilet.

[02:55] Jasmine explains her journey from Georgia to Zambia, and how her company is inspired by how access to toilets hinders women’s advancement worldwide.

[04:30] Her team was the first all-female team to win the Georgia Tech InVenture competition.

[05:00] At the end of 2014, she founded Wish for Wash and moved to Zambia to join a global health initiative, and now self-identifies as a “toilet designer”.

[07:45] The need for healthy food is much easier to communicate than the need for good sanitation, making it difficult to convince people to change their behavior.

[11:21] There’s nothing “wrong” with the way western civilization deals with sanitation and waste. However, there are opportunities to recycle waste rather than just moving it away from people.

[13:15] The “sanitation value chain” explains the aspirational sanitation experience - capture, contain, transport, and repurpose.

[14:15] Wish for Wash is looking at the other end of the value chain. Rather than thinking of how to profit from waste, they are focusing on capture and containment.

[15:00] Their toilet design is modular, allowing for both sitting and squatting. They are also prototyping a manual bidet for communities who practice washing rather than wiping.

[17:25] Access to affordable manufacturing is the current barrier to entry, especially allowing them to make quick and frequent iterations.

[24:30] One of the biggest lessons learned in this venture is to practice patience.

[26:00] There’s a challenge in selling both a product and a behavioral change at the same time.

[27:15] They are exploring military applications, among other contexts for using the toilet.

[28:12] Jasmine speaks to her big goal this year for Wish for Wash.

[30:00] In the future, they would like to find a less invasive way to collect data, such as a mobile app.

[32:39] Supporting the cause can be as simple as having a conversation with Jasmine and her team.

[33:20] Charlie shares his final thoughts on the 3 ways he wants you to consider this episode.

Mentioned in This Episode:

InVenture

Wish for Wash

Water and Sanitation for the Urban Poor

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Many modern men are caught in a strange space. For one, we can’t and don’t want to be like our fathers and grandfathers, but we also don’t want to be some shade of Homer Simpson. And yet, there’s not much space to talk about this in public either. Add in the fact that many of us, men and women alike, work in confined spaces indoors, and what you get is a ‘caged-in man’, both literally and metaphorically. Jonathan Mead joins me today to jam about reclaiming wild men and how physical movement is tied to our encaging. Note, we discuss the apparent heteronormativity of these views in this conversation, so if that’s bugging you, listen in first. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[1:08] Thank you to our sponsor, SaneBox.

[2:10] Quick shout out to Lee, Nadia and Rob. Thanks for the emails and ratings about the show you all!

[2:16] Charlie tells us a little bit about Jonathan Mead.

[4:18] How did Jonathan’s journey evolve from Illuminated Mind to Pay to Exist to the Uncaged Man?

[7:23] Jonathan is passionate about helping men uncage and reclaim their innate wildness to become the greatest versions of themselves.

[9:52] How has Jonathan created a brand that’s exclusively for men? He shares on the journey.

[14:28] Where are we as the modern man, right now?

[18:50] Men need to be physical and men need to have an outlet for expressing those sharper energies that don’t seem to have a place to fit within society.

[20:13] Nature vs. over-domestication of men. Jonathan explains the distinction.

[23:03] Everyone is on the spectrum of masculine and feminine energy.

[29:41] Aggressive loving? Jonathan gives examples to explain.

[33:23] Back to the wildness!

[36:26] We are animals, well, we wear cloths...and all animals play-fight.

[39:56] How does Jonathan help men uncage their mind, body, heart, and spirit? The fastest way to uncage and reclaim your wildness as a man is through the body.

[42:07] What are some things men can do to make natural movements more accessible in their everyday lives? “Squad and hang”

[46:15] If you are resonating with this discussion, check out Jonathan’s free resources on the Uncaged Men website.

[49:42] Jonathan’s challenge: Go outside and squad for 1 minute, barefoot.

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox

Paid to Exist

Uncaged Man: Reclaim your wildness

The Illuminated Mind by Jonathan Mead

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If you’ve ever considered being a fine artist or have talked to an artist you know, you’ve probably heard or accepted some variate of ‘the gallery myth’, which is that the goal is to have your art featured in a gallery and then you’re set for life. Buyers will flock to you, critics will appreciate you, and you’ll get to continue to make the art you love. I like stories about unicorns too! Cory Huff joins me for episode 79, to discuss the relationship between commerce and art, as well as the hidden path for artists that lead to real abundance. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[1:01] Who is Cory Huff?

[2:18] Cory has been on the show before. Check out Episode 25 on Art, Abundance, and Entrepreneurship with Cory Huff!

[3:06] Cory is “the great corruptor”!! What does capitalism have to do with it?

[8:18] Charlie sums up the 3 important points Cory made about the art world!

[10:24] Cory believes that for some artists Capitalism does inherently corrupt the art making process!

[12:38] Charlie believes that capitalism does influence an artist’s work but he’s pushing against the idea that it corrupts it!

[14:01] What is a huge problem in the art world according to Cory? What is a common challenge that all artist or creators are faced with?

[18:01] What are the traditional paths to an artist’s career?

[22:10] What is the hidden path to long-term longevity in the art world?

[23:45] There is a similar type of disruption across every creative field. What about the disruption in the fine art world?

[27:40] What does Cory see happening in the near future as a result of digitalization?

[30:02] What’s the relationship between the hidden path and social media? How can artists use social media effectively?

[33:43] Instagram just announced they’re introducing an algorithmic feed! What does that mean?

[38:03] What are Cory’s thoughts on the relationship between artists, the hidden path and experts?

[43:55] What’s the ‘not so silver lining’ of not caring what the experts think about your art?

[46:07] Cory shares his final thoughts and how you can reach out to him!

Mentioned in This Episode:

Theabundantartist.com

The Abundant Artist on Facebook

How to Sell Your Art Online by Cory Huff

The Abundant Artist Conference

Episode 25: Art, Abundance, and Entrepreneurship with Cory Huff

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Let’s face it, the legal, tax and financial aspects of our businesses and creative ventures are areas that many of us avoid. We’ve been conditioned to be afraid of them, in the case of financial and tax matters; and diving into the financial realm, naturally makes people feel uncomfortable. But avoiding them is like trying to build a third floor of your business without building its foundation. Kyle Durand joins me today to jam about 3 essential pieces of your business’s legal, tax, and financial foundation. I ask him some of the common questions I get, so listen in to see if he answers a question you might have. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[1:06] Who is Kyle Durand?

[3:28] What motivated Kyle to do a deep dive into the legal, tax and financial realms?

[6:25] Kyle shares a story to help us reframe our relationship with legal, tax and financial matters.

[10:59] What are Kyle’s reasons for laying a legal and financial foundation in a businesses.

[14:02] How does this type of foundation help you to set the foundation for business growth?

[18:23] Kyle discusses the different pillars of the business foundation.

[19:16] What is a business entity? How does Kyle use it to his advantage?

[21:50] What are 3 different configurations to consider when deciding on a type of business entity?

[25:22] Kyle talks about financial systems and the importance of having clarity with money matters.

[30:36] When should you get professional help to set up your financial system? What do you want and don’t want in a bookkeeper?

[37:06] Kyle talks about business contracts and agreements, which may be the scariest part of all!

[43:22] What does Kyle think about the 50/50 partnership agreement?

[47:15] When is it a good time to tackle the business partnership agreement? The dos & don’ts of business ventures!

[54:56] What is the one thing that Kyle wants the listeners to take action on?

Mentioned in This Episode:

www.kyledurand.com

QuickBooks

Disclaimer:

This does not constitute legal and financial advice. Please consult a professional and engage them for consideration.

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Cynthia Morris joins me today to jam about creativity, talent and Capturing the Wow that comes up as we travel through our days. This is a particularly good episode to listen to if you’re at the beginning of your mastering journey with a creative form, whether that form is writing, painting, music, programming or blogging, or any other creative form. Also, if you just found yourself feeling paralyzed by trying to cater to all of the voices out there that might judge your work. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[0:57] Charlie is delighted to introduce us to Cynthia Morris.

[2:51] What is a ‘Medium-agnostic creator’ and how did Cynthia get to owning that title?

[7:21] Charlie gives a shout out to Corey Huff, who teaches how to sell your art online!

[9:41] How does Cynthia manage the tension between letting her creativity play out in the moment vs. making it better or something ‘for show’?

[14:01] What kills creativity and authenticity?

[18:35] The element of surprise is a really powerful aspect of life that makes life fun & enjoyable.

[20:51] What kind of tension exists between creative surprise and trust?

[22:25] What about Cynthia’s art does she think is pretty cool?

[24:13] The main takeaway from this conversation: Give yourself some space to play & explore!

[24:36] Charlie and Cynthia discuss different levels of consciousness about one’s own competence.

[27:41] What sort of tension exists between solo creativity vs. social catalytic creativity?

[28:43] How can we be our most authentic selves when we’re making and sharing our work?

[31:18] What is the concept of “Capture the Wow” all about? Cynthia explains and outlines 3 of the capture tools she has created.

[38:48] Cynthia shares an example of how she recently used Capture the Wow.

[40:38] Cynthia’s creative challenge for this week.

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox

Books by Cynthia Morris:

• • Create Your Writer's Life
• • Chasing Sylvia Beach
• • Go for It: Leading Tours for Fun and Profit
• • The Graceful Return

Capture the Wow

Original Impulse

Art as a way, Book by Frederick Franck

Corey Huff on How to Sell Art Online

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What does depression, strategy, financial intelligence and specialization, all have in common? They’re all related to choices. In the case of depression, sometimes feeling like you don’t have any. They’re also topics Tara Gentile and I jam about. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[0:53] Charlie is delighted to have Tara on the show again. She also joined him on episode 27.

[2:21] How did Tara go from a career in an academic track, to being an entrepreneur? How did her depression affect her path?

[9:03] What are some of the links between creativity and depression?

[11:24] How might not expressing yourself lead to the feeling that you’re denying an important piece of yourself?

[14:30] How might the hunger you get as an entrepreneur have a positive effect on depression?

[18:26] Tara talks on her ongoing struggle with having to say no to things in order to create what she really wants in the future.

[23:13] Charlie and Tara discuss how people’s ultimate goals & what they really want right now often don’t match up, which ties into the importance of choosing to not choose.

[29:05] How can you stop business burnout from happening by focusing on things that matter? What is The Content Delusion?

[32:48] What questions does Tara ask when she comes across new tactics, methods or strategies? How does experience tie into this?

[36:41] What are some frameworks that allow people to say yes or no very easily?

[42:18] Tara wants to know how Charlie handles the shame that comes up when analyzing what hasn’t worked in the past with his clients.

[48:00] A lot of the insecurity and fear that comes up with creative entrepreneurs stems from not looking at the books, plans, and strategies.

[49:33] Tara talks about the DailyWorth, which offers financial and career advice for women.

[52:27] Tara and Charlie discuss predictability and ‘game changers’.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Tara Gentile

Episode 27: Leveraging Your Quiet Power with Tara Gentile

The Content Delusionby Jonathan Fields

DailyWorth - Financial and Career Advice for Women

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We all know that death is a part of life, but it’s the part of life that we, as a society and individuals, often would rather not talk about. And yet, not talking about it isn’t making it go away; and in fact, makes death and dying so much harder for us to process. Kathy Kortes-Miller joins me today to talk about how to bring life into conversations about death. If you’re not a long time listener to the show, you might wonder why we’re talking about death. One of the reasons I do this show is to share a wider range of the human and creative experience than just the Oprah version. I most want you and us all to see that we’re not alone in whatever adversity we’re going through, and you can triumph too. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[1:13] Thank you to our sponsor, SaneBox.com.

[2:13] Charlie is pumped to introduce Kathy Kortes-Miller.

[3:52] How did Kathy slide into a career in death education?

[5:32] How did she feel about death at the early stages of this path?

[7:40] How did we get to this point where death is such a taboo topic to talk about?

[12:35] Charlie shares a story on death in earlier forms of our societies and existence.

[14:06] Why would we want death to become a normative life event?

[17:32] How do we open the door to having conversations about death across generations?

[20:41] What sort of things have people, who are at the end of their lives, told Kathy they wished they had done differently.

[22:28] What are some conversation initiators on how to have a more intentional or celebratory passing?

[27:49] How do we make conversations about death something that’s what we want to do vs. what we have to do?

[31:54] People don’t necessarily know what to do after your passing. They don’t know what rituals you want or what legacy you want to leave behind.

[34:20] Kathy shares a story about a family she worked with whose dad was dying.

[35:57] What’s happening now with the traditional funeral model?

[37:46] Kathy’s ‘one song’ about death and the process of dying.

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox

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Angela is joining me today to jam about the emotional journey that happens as you’re growing and scaling your business. There are a lot of ups and downs, but a lot of times we’re not talking about the leaders or founders’ journey of grief, excitement, freedom, and fear that happens as they start letting go of more and more pieces of the business and start working on the business rather than in the business. This came up because a team mate was letting us know she was talking to a friend who is a small business owner that’s going through it. So, we thought it’s a great topic to talk about. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[1:07] The framework for today’s discussion is based on Michael Gerber’s distinction between working on the business vs. working in the business.

[3:54] The Small Business Lifecycle and the first stage of business growth.

[4:51] The second stage of growing your team and delegation.

[6:03] The last and hardest stage of business growth, which occurs in mature businesses.

[9:23] How do you let go of something you’re so good at doing in your own business? Slowly!

[17:25] What do you do with your newly gained creative energy?

[22:01] The tense balance that is created when you’re at the last stage of letting go of responsibilities.

[26:46] There are different things you can do with that excess creative energy.

[30:20] The challenges with slowing down and letting the rest of your team take care of things!

[34:39] An opportune time to take a step back as a founder or CEO and get really clear about the vision for your business.

[38:04] The two types of fear that come up for people in getting to that level of finally letting go.

[40:02] Growing your business involves an emotional and spiritual journey that can be embraced.

Mentioned in This Episode:

The E-Myth, book by Michael Gerber

The Small Business Lifecycle, book by Charlie Gilkey

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Though we wear cloths every day – at least most of us do – many of us don’t think about the entrepreneurial and economic aspects related to the cloths we wear. Like many other business industries, the fashion industry is going through a massive disruption, making it a great time to be an entrepreneur and creative person within the fashion industry. That said, it’s also really tough. Shannon Whitehead joins me today to discuss how to sew business success in the fashion industry. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[0:58] Thank you to our sponsor, SaneBox.com.

[1:58] Who is Shannon Whitehead?

[3:26] Why did Shannon decide to start her own sustainable apparel business?

[4:46] Why the apparel industry?

[6:27] What is it about the fashion industry that makes it tough?

[8:03] What are some of the different trends that make it tough to get started in the fashion industry?

[10:02] What are the trends that are leading to the fashion industry’s disruption?

[11:58] What are some challenges that may come up for someone who is starting a clothing line?

[15:39] Why did Shannon choose to play up not having VC money when she launched Factory45?

[17:36] Why did she decide to close up shop with Revolution Apparel despite all the buzz?

[19:19] Shannon talks us through the story of closing down Revolution Apparel.

[23:00] What was harder, and easier, than she thought it would be with Factory 45?

[25:30] How did she talk about Factory45 in 2014 vs. now?

[26:45] Why is it such a big deal to manufacture clothing with environmentally-friendly methods?

[29:54] What were some of the spark moments since starting Factory45?

[31:00] What’s the greatest unanticipated challenge Shannon is currently facing?

[34:29] Shannon’s main message to us!

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox

Project 333 by Courtney Carver

Factory45

Revolution Apparel

Seemly Apparel

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Many of us get stuck in life, because for some reason or the other we’re resistant to change. Being resistant to change is like being resistant to gravity, we might be able to counter some the effects of it, but it’s always going to be there. There are some amazing gifts that come from embracing change, and Jenny Blake joins me to jam about the ways to embrace change rather than to resist it. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[0:51] Thank you to our sponsor, SaneBox.com

[1:51] Charlie tells us a bit about Jenny and her body of work.

[3:54] What excites Jenny the most about living in New York?

[5:16] How did Jenny get started with ‘Life After College’ before leading Google?

[6:41] How did she handle her crisis of confidence when she decided to leave Google?

[7:54] How did Jenny find her spark after struggling with her confidence & the path she was on?

[12:45] Jenny’s ‘aha’ moment with PIVOT & digging herself out of the ‘dark existential hole’.

[15:03] How do you get in that creative spark zone without crisis or hitting rock bottom?

[18:19] Meditation practice is a big business accelerator for Jenny!

[21:29] What was most surprising when writing her book, PIVOT?

[24:54] We never know what the future holds, but we do have certain ‘constants’!

[29:53] The new security for Jenny: having a diversified portfolio of our day & our income.

[31:46] What do you do when you’re in an ‘okay’ or a ‘great’ job by others’ standards, but that it’s not the ‘IT’ job for you?

[34:53] What kind of life do you want to live? Are you aligning your day-to-day with your values?

[39:21] What are the pieces of your priorities’ pie & how are you going to portion & slice it up?

[42:14] Jenny suggests finding ‘constants’ in your life to help you make better decisions.

[46:37] Within a decision itself you can have known and unknown variables. Turn the scary unknowns into ‘how can I’ questions?

[49:21] What is the most unanticipated challenge Jenny is facing right now & what is a known ‘unknown’ for her?

[55:41] What does Jenny want people to remember about her or her body of work?

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox

JennyBlake.me

@jenny_blake

Life After College

PIVOT by Jenny Blake

Sacret Contracts by Caroline Myss

Antifragile by Nassim Nicholas Taleb

Scarcity by Sendhil Mullainathan and Eldar Shafir

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Most people don’t put managing their money and being creative together. Especially since one seems to be what you have to do, whereas the other seems to be what you get to do. But managing your money is a creative process and whether you like it or not, it’s an emotional process too. Luna Jaffe joins me today to share how she has incorporated her work as an artist into her work as a guide for people to improve their relationship with their money. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[0:53] Struggling to keep up with processing your email? SaneBox may just be the tool you need!

[1:30] Go to SaneBbox.com/giant & you’ll get a $25 credit towards subscription on top of the 14 days free trial.

[1:55] Charlie tells us a bit about Luna Jaffe and her work!

[3:51] What was it like to jump from being a psychotherapist to being a financial planner?

[7:53] What were some clear visions Luna had that seemed super crazy? What happened when she pursued them?

[9:56] How does Luna maintain momentum & at the same time does quantum shifts?

[14:19] What’s been 3 lessons Luna has had to learn all over again?

[18:02] Luna’s thoughts on going from being solo-oriented to community-oriented.

[22:40] Luna’s suggestions on how to visualize & think about your relationship with money.

[26:14] What are some surprising or unexpected things she has seen with people & their money?

[30:07] Any good coach is asking good questions & encouraging people to understand things at a deeper level.

[33:24] What’s been harder to do with Sacred Money Studios that didn’t turn out to be that hard?

[38:28] What’s it like to go through the highs & lows of running her businesses?

[44:55] What’s the most unanticipated challenge Luna is facing right now?

[48:35] What’s the one thing Luna wants the listeners to take away from this episode?

Mentioned in This Episode:

Luna Jaffe – Where Creativity & Money Meet

Lunaria Financial

KMS Financial Services Inc.

Wild Money: A Creative Journey to Financial Wisdom by Luna Jaffe

Wild Money Coloring Book by Luna Jaffe

Sacred Money Studios

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Part of being a Creative Giant is learning to be fully you, however you might show up. That’s a hard enough journey but it can feel even more daunting to learn to do that while in a romantic relationship with another Creative Giant. Dr. Laura Ciel and Bill Poett join me to talk about their work together and how they navigate a romantic partnership that’s also a business partnership. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[0:52] Struggling to keep up with processing your email? SaneBox may just be the tool you need!

[1:30] Go to SaneBbox.com/giant & you’ll get a $25 credit towards subscription on top of the 14 days free trial.

[1:54] Charlie introduces Dr. Laura Ciel and Bill Poett.

[3:45] Dr. Laura Ciel shares her origin story.

[4:50] Bill Poett shares his origin story.

[6:05] How did their conversation about doing business together begin?

[9:04] Bill unpacks how they went from their first conversation to co-leading, 5 weeks later.

[10:58] Bill talks about his emotional journey with Laura’s competency.

[15:51] What’s been the biggest type of conflict or disagreement between them & how have they worked it out?

[21:36] What’s a pattern about the other person that you wish were different?

[27:13] What’s the secret sauce of the Life Advance International program?

[32:10] A discussion on the journey to love and the power of love.

[36:46] What does Bill do to support Laura when she is not in her ‘zone’?

[41:20] What does Laura do to support Bill when he’s not at his ‘standing tall’ place?

[45:59] Charlie talks about the Nonviolent Communication (page 44).

[47:12] Laura & Bill are committed the outcome but how they get there is left open.

[52:25] What do Laura & Bill have to say to someone who may be giving up on love?

[57:53] What do they want people to remember about them & their body of work?

Mentioned in This Episode:

SaneBox

Sanebox.com/Giant

Life Advance International

The Warrior-Heart Project

Live and Love Fearlessly, Book by Bill Poett

Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life, Book by Marshall Rosenberg

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Mentors often make the difference between us successfully finishing the stuff that matters and just thinking or dreaming about it. This is especially the case for young adults and new entrepreneurs, who often times get so much well meaning, but bad advice from other people who’ve never gone where the ‘would be mentee’ is trying to go. Jeff Hopeck joins me to jam about the value of mentors and some ways to go about building your own mentor group. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[2:00] Charlie tells us about Jeff Hopeck’s background.

[3:25] Jeff talks about his work and how he ended up being an entrepreneur.

[8:00] Jeff discusses how he ended up on the Howard Stern Radio.

[9:30] Jeff lets us know how Killer Shark was born.

[11:15] Why do so many entrepreneurs fail out of the gate?

[14:15] Focus on the growth and the pathway to there, not necessarily the destination.

[14:45] Why is it important to have mentors at a young age?

[17:20] Charlie asks Jeff how he went from a Marketing Degree to the US Secret Service.

[19:30] Jeff shares with us the pathway he took to get him to the place where he is today.

[21:45] Jeff tells us about Jack Canfield’s book, The Success Principals.

[23:50] Charlie and Jeff discuss Jordan Agolli from Episode 56.

[27:55] Align yourself with people who don’t question whether you will be successful, but help you to figure out how you’ll be successful.

[28:20] How would young people go about finding a mentor?

[28:38] Jeff outlines how he chooses the different mentors in his life.

[33:30] What is the #1 huge piece in choosing a mentor.

[37:53] Jeff shares two “Anchor Posts” on his website:

1. 13 Questions I think Entrepreneurs Should Constantly Ask
2. 9 Most Common Mistakes Entrepreneurs Make (and Usually Repeat)

[40:00] Jeff discusses the importance of aligning with your ethical and spiritual core values.

[42:45] Young people need to have a vision. Start formulating now.

[48:00] What do people get wrong when choosing a mentor?

[51:58] Where is the best place to discuss questions with your prospective mentor?

[55:30] Jeff unpacks his most unanticipated challenge with Killer Shark.

[57:30] Get a solid road map of the areas of your life and start developing mentors in every area.

Mentioned in This Episode:

http://www.sanebox.com/

The Success Principles – Book by Jack Canfield

jeffhopeck.com

Jordan Agolli Episode 56

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While we like the idea that we can simply think ourselves into certain beliefs and instincts, the truth of the matter is that our personality is partially determined by our evolutionary history. There might be some things lurking down there that we don’t want to address, but we can’t ignore them either. Professor Tod Kashdan joins me today to jam about, what he calls, the ‘basement of your personality’ and why it matters. If you’re looking for change, maybe it’s time to look in the basement of your personality. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[2:04] Charlie tells us about Dr. Todd Kashdan’s body of work.

[3:52] Todd talks about his work and the field of positive psychology.

[5:14] Many people don’t think about how our evolutionary history affects the development of our personality.

[6:42] Why do we avoid the evolutionary psychology background underlying character development?

[8:17] Charlie talks about Vanessa Van Edwards’ work on subconscious behavioral cues.

[9:23] The link between in-group/out-group preferences and our biological responses.

[14:02] Todd shares research findings on xenophobia & pregnant women in the 3rd trimester.

[15:10] The first benefit of evolutionary psychology is understanding who we are.

[16:26] What can we do about the constraints on the body & what the brain can process?

[21:26] Cultural differences in cheerfulness, optimism, and positivity – Japan vs. US.

[23:57] Would you prefer to be more cheerful most of the time or to be more resilient…?

[26:42] How do we deal with the friction of everyday life?

[29:25] Creativity is about seeing things from a different perspective than others.

[31:58] Todd shares findings from a study that looked at the personality dimensions of about 15,000 entrepreneurs.

[34:28] Charlie & Todd discuss the profile of a creative person.

[35:53] What are the personality traits of creative people?

[39:58] Todd reiterates on the importance of culture.

[41:44] Todd shares his insights on what you can do to build up your stress tolerance.

[48:33] Todd’s 3 tips, summarized:

1. Choose curiosity over criticality.
2. Persuade people by asking why something is important to them and listen.
3. Be precise in describing your emotional state when you are stressed and upset.

Mentioned in This Episode:

http://www.sanebox.com/

Vanessa Van Edwards – Science of People/

The Upside of Your Dark Side: Why Being Your Whole Self--Not Just Your "Good" Self--Drives Success and Fulfillment – Book by Robert Biswas-Diener and Todd Kashdan

Curious? Discover the Missing Ingredient to a Fulfilling Life – Book by Todd Kashdan

To Sell Is Human: The Surprising Truth About Moving Others – Book by Daniel Pink

Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life: Life-Changing Tools for Healthy Relationships. Book by Marshall B. Rosenberg

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Finishing creative work is challenging because sometimes you can’t just push through, as doing so will lead to creative burnout. And yet, you can’t give up when it gets hard or you’ll never really do the work that matters. Jennifer Louden joins me on this episode to share how her wearing away from creative burnout lead to a new body of work and what she has learned along the way about avoiding creative burnout. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[0:58] Who is Jennifer Louden?

[3:19] Jennifer shares her origin story.

[6:37] How did Jennifer transition from being a screen writer to writing a book on self-care?

[13:38] What new elements did the shift allow her to introduce into her body of work?

[15:01] Gender-differences in creativity – Are there any?

[16:56] How does Jennifer’s competitive nature trip her up?

[18:05] How does her competitive nature help her out?

[22:24] What is Jennifer excited about? –Aside from her memoir.

[24:35] What are some dynamics of women & creativity that are under-addressed?

[27:36] How has Jennifer helped women say ‘yes’ to themselves?

[30:03] Willian Stafford’s ‘The Thread’ vs. this big/scary life-purpose thing.

[32:27] Jennifer and Charlie share a few stories.

[36:44] Where do we get this idea that if it’s hard we should be doing something else?

[38:14] Jennifer shares advice on the Keystone Habits.

[40:00] Why does she resist habit, rituals, and structure? But they’re also so important!

[44:56] The one thing Jennifer wants us to remember about her and her body of work.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Books by Jennifer Louden

The Woman’s Comfort book

The Couple’s Comfort Book

The Pregnant Woman’s Comfort Book

The Woman’s Retreat Book

Comfort Secrets for Busy Women

The Life Organizer

Year of Daily Joy

The Way It Is by William Stafford

Keystone Habits

https://www.sanebox.com/Giant

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A common myth is that scaling a business means you have to compromise the core values, culture and human-friendly qualities that the business originally started with. In today’s episode, Laura Novak Meyer joins me to share what she learned in the process of scaling her business while keeping it true to its core. Laura is an entrepreneur who is one of only 3% of women business owners to grow their company to more than one million dollars in revenue. Ready? Let’s do this!

Key Takeaways:

[0:53] Laura Novak Myers – The owner & founder of Little Nest Portraits

[1:46] Laura shares her origin story.

[2:30] How did Laura go from an independent photographer to a retail photography company?

[5:35] Opening her first little Nest location.

[6:38] What made Laura hire her first employee?

[9:12] Did Laura have any entrepreneurial background before starting her own business?

[10:25] Why do people cling to that divide between creative and business?

[13:21] Laura’s 3 seminal challenges and lessons learned from them.

[17:46] How did she overcome her concern for hurting people’s feelings while giving feedback.

[20:32] Something Laura is very passionate about.

[22:37] Laura doesn’t believe you can grow without constantly reinforcing your values.

[25:35] Why didn’t Laura tell her employees about franchising at first?

[28:52] Some of Laura’s spark moments throughout her career.

[31:07] Laura’s best practices for maintaining a sense of calmness.

[33:34] The unspoken pressures every entrepreneur is faced with.

[36:52] Franchising was harder than Laura expected it to be.

[41:36] The most unanticipated challenge Laura is facing.

[44:14] If people remember only one thing about Laura and her body of work, what would it be?

Mentioned in This Episode:

Little Nest Portraits

Radical Candor by Campbell Scott

Fierce Conversations by Susan Scott

The One Minute Manager by Ken Blanchard

Build to Sell by John Warrillow

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Coaching is a powerful way of being with people, because it unlocks human potential and transforms the way you relate to others. It is also really misunderstood, misrepresented, and when done right it is hard to do. Michael Bungay Stanier is an award winning coach and he joins me today to work through some powerful coaching questions you can use at work and at home. Make sure to listen in, for the turn in the conversation about two thirds of the way through this episode. Ready? Let's do this!

Key Takeaways:

[1:00] Who is Michael Bungay Stanier?

[3:25] Michael’s books, Do More Great Work & The Coaching Habit

[4:31] Michael talks about the ‘resistance’ to coaching and related statistics

[6:00] Coaching is about leading with more curiosity and with a lot less advice

[6:59] The T.E.R.A quotient explains why it’s hard for people to listen and not be an 'advice monster'

[9:33] Coaching is an effective leadership style and it has to be done in 10 minutes or less

[12:59] Michael talks on the process and provides a working definition of coaching

[14:47] Managers can delegate and still hold their value in an organization

[16:41] The drama triangle: Victim, Persecutor, and Rescuer

[21:14] The 7 most powerful coaching questions for managers, from The Coaching Habit (p. 200)

[23:04] The two questions Michael puts more weight on when coaching managers.

[26:28] Why does asking 'why' get a little problematic?

[27:27] Which of the questions seem easy but in fact are harder to have a powerful conversation around?

[29:39] The trickiest question for Michael is the foundation question: What do you want?

[32:12] Michael talks on the difference between wants and needs

[34:06] Which of the 7 questions is the most challenging for Michael?

[41:04] How to transform your own potential? Michael has a mastermind group

[43:19] Michael talks about the process of writing and shaping his new book

[46:30] Michael’s one takeaway message: "Say no to more stuff so you can say yes to the right stuff".

Mentioned in This Episode:

Box of Crayons

Do More Great Work by Micheal Bungay Stanier

End Malaria by Micheal Bungay Stanier

Malaria no More

The Coaching Habit by Micheal Bungay Stanier

Goleman, Daniel. "Leadership that gets results." (2000).

TouchPoints: Creating Powerful Leadership Connections in the Smallest of Moments by Douglas Conant and Mette Norgaard John Whitmore The 7 most powerful coaching questions… from The Coaching Habit (p. 200)

Immunity to Change by Robert Kegan and Lisa Lahey

Michael Bungay Stanier’s Mastermind Group

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You were probably in the goal setting mode for 2016 or maybe you just want to set the right goals. It turns out that making great goals is often a matter of asking the right questions. Jeffrey Davis and I think a particularly good question is, "what will you stand for, this year?" and that's what we're jamming about on this episode. This isn't about fighting against something but rather standing up and standing for something. You are writing a story, so you might as well think about what you want to include in that story. Ready? Let's do this!

Key Takeaways:

[01:04] Jeffrey Davis joined Charlie on episode 7: "Don’t Be an Idea Thief"

[03:56] Jeffery thinks creativity is our biological and even spiritual impulse

[04:33] One way that we're creative – we connect dots and find patterns

[07:04] We can be selective about our public story and still remain authentic

[09:02] Jeffrey on putting forth the story you want to own

[12:47] Stories can serve as windows and as mirrors

[14:04] Jeffrey and Charlie discuss creativity and authenticity

[17:16] Shaping the larger story of what you're about can be a really creative endeavor

[20:46] Wanting to re-enter a story and the importance of the back story

[23:45] What are the values or ideals that are driving us?

[24:25] Jeffrey talks about Paul Zak's research on the neuroscience of the narrative

[27:11] Examples of ideal-driven companies that own their brand stories

[34:25] Think about your core story, your legacy, and what you want to be known for

[36:16] "Your brand is the total emotional experience that people have with you or your business"

[37:05] Jeffrey on what it means to be a thought leader

[39:01] Charlie on looking retroactively and asking, “what have I been standing for?”

Mentioned in This Episode:

Episode 7 : "Don't Be an Idea Thief" with Jeffrey Davis

Tracking Wonder

Paul Zak’s research on the neuroscience of narrative

Apple and Steve Jobs

Jeff Bezos from amazon

Brandon Page from Google

Sam Walton from Walmart

Joe Gebbia and his partners from Airbnb

Method house cleaning

American Giant

Daniel Goleman and emotional intelligence

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Branded a "Moxie Maven" by The White House Office of Public Engagement for her unique and effective approach to leadership development, through her 'Step Into Your Moxie' platform, Alexia has become the go-to expert for helping entrepreneurs, executives, online experts, and other thought leaders create, pitch, and perform their spotlight talks and design and execute transformational events. Alexia is also the founder and director of Influencer Academy, a women's leadership development program. Alexia not only cultivates the voices of thought leaders, she is one! Alexia has scored FaceTime with hundreds of corporate, conference and college audiences; with her key note speeches and interactive trainings; and she has contributed to media including CNN, NBC, The Wall Street Journal, Inc., Forbes, and Women's Health Magazine. I'm excited to have Alexia on the show, sharing her voice so that you can better use your voice!

Key Takeaways:

[02:28] Alexia shares her origin story on how she got started with public speaking?

[05:51] The powerful moment Alexia experienced at 4 years of age (aka Initial Act of Moxie)

[07:12] The power and fears associated with speaking out to say what needs to be said

[08:52] Alexia talks about gender differences in fear of public speaking

[10:48] Charlie's theory on how women & men have been socialized to respond to rejection

[11:39] Alexia’s 10 month program, rooted in leadership

[13:57] Alexia shares on learning that we don't need to be great in everything we do

[17:49] Charlie recommends The First 20 Hours by Josh Kaufman

[18:35] Alexia shares her journey to public speaking after getting her BA in Women's Studies

[21:37] Charlie wants to celebrate that Alexia hated being broke!

[23:36] How did she ‘unlearn’ the idea business is contradictory to what I'm doing - how did that manifest for her?

[27:12] Alexia talks on the different parts of their journey potential speakers might be facing

[29:52] Alexia shares some insight on talking about topics that are more difficult or unpopular

[33:48] What's most important is for people that need you to know that you are there for them!

[35:47] Alexia gives a shout out to Toshia Shaw

[38:14] How do people find their message? How do you get to "The idea"?

[40:17] What stories do you share?

[40:59] What do you do when your message starts changing?

[43:38] Do what makes sense based on your circumstances

[46:40] What's Alexia's big message today?

[48:06] What's the most unanticipated challenge that Alexia is currently facing?

[51:04] What does Alexa want people to remember about her & her body of work?

Mentioned in This Episode:

Influencer Academy

Step Into Your Moxie

The First 20 Hours by Josh Kaufman

Jacquette Timmonson TCGS

Woodhull Institute

The pact by Toshia Shaw at TEDx

Brene Brown on “Big Strong Magic”, from Magic Lessons with Elizabeth Gilbert

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It's the time of year where we're thinking about setting new goals and new resolutions. On this final episode of 2015, Angela and Charlie wanted to take the time to talk about some things to think about as you’re setting intentions and new plans for the New Year. They’re excited to jump into the show. Ready? Let's do this!

Key Takeaways

[01:12] What is Angela looking forward to for next year?

[02:26] What to think about when you're creating plans for next year.

[02:33] Do a review before you plan a new.

[06:17] How did your actions for this year align with your values?

[07:00] Why is it so important for us to review before we start planning?

[09:50] How the negativity bias plays into New Year's resolutions.

[12:49] Reviewing plans allows you to see the story in a very deep way.

[13:18] Celebrate your daily & weekly progress instead of waiting for a huge ending to celebrate.

[19:20] Focusing on our mundane progress builds processes that we really enjoy.

[20:41] What you feed, grows – Make sure the things that matter to you are getting fed.

[26:19] Focus on fewer goals – Choose the things that matter most & focus more of your energy on those things.

[30:36] What to do when you get stuck and not sure what to do.

[33:19] Celebrate what you have achieved this year!

Mentioned in This Episode:

Sideways Isn't Necessarily the Wrong Way

5 Ways Reviewing Your Plans Can Enhance Your Success

Vision Quest

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The stories we often hear and tell ourselves about entrepreneurs, are that successful entrepreneurs somehow had it in their blood or it was always what they wanted to be. The problem is that a lot of people who are now entrepreneurs never thought they'd be one or even have a hard time owning the title now. Graham Cochrane joins me to talk about his journey from freelancer to a successful entrepreneur in the music industry.

About Graham Cochrane:

Graham is a freelance recording and mix engineer living in Tampa, Florida; and he is the founder of one of the world's most loved audio recording and mixing blogs, The Recording Revolution, having over 200,000 readers each month. As a lifelong singer/song writer and musician, his passion for recording and mixing has grown from the bedroom studio, to university where he studied audio production, to multi-million dollar studios, to fortune 500 software companies; and all the while freelancing for artists and bands worldwide. Graham's work in business has been featured in Yahoo, Business Insider, and Creative Live to name a few. He thinks of himself as a musician and an artist and never thought he'd be in the position where he is now a success that other people are turning to.

Key Takeaways:

[02:07] Graham shares on how he got started in the music business.

[04:44] He returned the book Four Hour Work Week, because he thought it’s a fantasy.

[05:59] Graham never thought it was in the cards for him to make a good living as a musician.

[07:48] How did he get the idea he could make good money doing something he loves?

[09:16] Feeling like an impostor makes it tough to feel confident at the beginning.

[11:29] It takes having a vision that most of us don't have at the beginning.

[13:53] We're not a good judge of what we can sell, so sometimes we have to try & that is how his blog started.

[14:23] The thing we're best at, we undervalue the most!

[15:45] Blogging is a great way to find out what people are willing to pay for.

[16:30] What was the process of going from free to paid to premium content like for him?

[19:34] Graham shares a few ways to make money as a content creator.

[22:01] Major lessons he learned when first starting The Recording Revolution.

[24:41] His entire business model is…

[25:52] Spark moments & how his website's traffic doubled in just a month.

[28:39] Graham’s advice for content creators when they're in the pre-hockey stick phase.

[33:06] Graham summarizes his 3 pieces of advice.

[34:16] Quality over quantity!

[36:44] Don’t get away from the core of what made you great, plus more advice on succeeding.

[40:16] People & relationships outweigh numbers.

[43:45] Most people won't buy from you - create the best free content in your niche.

[45:41] Front load with free content because it's like advertising & grows your audience.

[48:17] You have to really like the content you're creating.

[50:27] What is the most unanticipated challenge he is currently facing?

[52:52] What is an unanticipated challenge he is facing on the personal level?

[54:58] It’s important to learn to say ‘no’ as your business grows.

[57:37] What is the one thing people should remember from Graham?

Mentioned in This Episode:

The recording revolution

The 4 Hour Workweek, by Tim Ferriss

The Go Giver, by Bob Burg

Impostor Syndrome, by Ramit Sethi

Michael Hyette

Ryan Lynch - niching down 3 levels

Mr. Money Mustache - Personal Finance Blogger

Career Renegade, by Jonathan Fields

The Small Business Lifecycle

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Email has become the primary tool many of us use to communicate with others. We both love it and hate it, because like money, email can be a great servant but a terrible master. Dmitri Leonov joins Charlie Gilkey to jam about ways you can make email work for you rather than against you. Email is one of Charlie’s favorite topics to talk about and he’s ready to jump into it with Dmitri.

Key Takeaways:

[0:48] Charlie introduces his guest, Dmitri Leonov

[1:30] The current email landscape

[2:31] The real reason for email overload is communication overload

[2:44] Three factors that contribute to this

[3:38] Becoming aware of how plugged in you are to everything by changing the context

[6:55] The other thing you can do is to put your smart phone in a shoebox!

[7:36] What else is it about the current email landscape that gets us to where we are?

[9:31] Dmitri schedules an hour in his calendar called “email time”, each day

[10:09] Charlie talks about the two posts he has written about this:

1. Difference between checking email & processing email
2. Don’t use your inbox as a to-do-list

[11:50] Dmitri adds to this by introducing the process called “triage”

[12:31] A hack he has found very useful

[14:15] Don’t use your inbox as an archive and what to do instead

[18:52] The Five Sentences Movement is about short & concise messages

[21:45] Transactional vs. conversational email communication

[24:25] Tags within email are an amazing development

[25:58] What other best practices Dmitri suggests? The core is to triage!

[28:10] The attention switching cost

[28:33] Dmitri suggests a second best practice

[31:42] We get stuck in the technological loop & it’s infinite

[32:39] Dmitri shares other advanced Ninja moves

[38:13] His favorite hack!

[44:01] Dmitri’s one takeaway: “don’t make email your priority”

Mentioned in This Episode:

Find BigMail

Slack

Boomerang

Google Inbox

SaneBox

Gmail’s “Undo Send”

The Black Hole - a tool developed by Dmitri’s group

WiseStampt

1Password

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The imposter syndrome is a major road block for many of us when it comes to doing our best work, especially if doing it requires us to start something new. “Who are you to do it?” rings so loudly inside us that we often can’t hear the other more helpful stories or see the other data points that show us that we’re on the right path. Dan Picket joins Charlie Gilkey for episode 59 to jam about how to debug the imposter syndrome.

Key Takeaways:

[0:55] Who is Dan Picket?

[1:02] Dan’s personal vision is to help people become the best version of themselves

[1:45] How is the imposter syndrome working on him right now?

[2:24] How did he get into programming?

[3:25] How did Dan start out in software development and programming?

[6:07] The stigma associated with software engineers.

[8:32] Why did he make the jump from Launchware to Launch Academy?

[10:59] How was the transition from entrepreneur to teacher?

[13:48] Computer software engineering is a rapidly evolving and multi-faceted universe!

[16:01] Disciplines that are in close periphery to software engineering are also affected by the pace of changing technology.

[17:07] What qualifies Dan to start Launch Academy?

[19:04] Imposter syndromes are so prevalent when you start something new.

[19:42] Dan shares two small anecdotes on overcoming the imposter syndrome.

[23:00] Only seeing the surface level of others’ work can make you feel like you’re not enough.

[24:32] The ironic thing about the imposter syndrome: it’s a self-fulfilling prophecy.

[26:36] Negative thoughts and stories can feed our fears and make us feel like an imposter.

[29:23] What would he do differently? Mindfulness.

[34:12] Always go back to your core values to see if what you’re doing is in-line with them.

[35:01] How does the imposter syndrome slide into the curriculum at Launch Academy?

[37:03] The zone of proximal development

[39:39] Advancement and growth only happens in discomfort.

[41:00] What’s his biggest challenge right now?

[44:52] Having patience and trust in others.

[46:06] The beauty of hiring based on core values and cultural fit.

[47:28] What is the one thing people could remember about Dan & his body of work from this episode?

Mentioned in this Episode:

Launchware

Launch Academy

MIT

Worcester Politech

Agile Education Method

Pam Slim Podcast (@ 22:04 min)

The Feeling Good Handbook by Dr. Burns

Emotional Obesity by Laura Coe

The World’s Religions by Huston Smith

Young Entrepreneurs Club

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Kristin Meekhof is a licenced Masters level social worker. She's a speaker, contributor to Huffington Post, a Maria Shriver “Architect of Change”, and the author of A Widow's Guide to Healing. She has been seen on Huffington Post Live, featured on American Greetings and at ABC Headquarters in New York. She has also been a panellist at the Parliament of World Religions. In 2007, she was 33 when her husband died from Adrenal cancer. About three years after his death, she decided that she wanted to interview as many widows as possible and put their narratives together in her book. She spent three and a half years talking with widows from various backgrounds to compile the book and share their stories. In 2014, Kristin traveled to Kenya and saw firsthand how widows live on less than a dollar a day. On today’s show, Kristin joins Charlie to talk about her experiences as a widow, and her experiences as an author who shared the stories of other widows in her recent book.

Key Takeaways:

[02:51] Is this something that we talk enough about in our society?

[02:57] Talking about loss & grief is a difficult conversation for people to have

[04:23] How did Kristin go from loss & grief to writing her own book?

[07:17] Clinical vs. narrative: which approach is more helpful for healing?

[08:17] What are some of the common threads of the widows’ stories that she compiled?

[09:20] Secondary losses that are caused by the primary loss

[10:42] Intense loneliness, secondary losses, and financial concerns are major themes across stories

[11:28] How different widows experience moving on with another partner

[14:38] Mothers of younger children have different approaches in dealing with the void that’s left following the loss of a father

[15:54] The widow label, and how it can have negative stigmas behind it

[18:08] After her husband's passing, when were some moments that checking the 'widow box’ struck Kristin?

[20:45] She talks on some assumptions that are made about widows

[22:08] What happened to her professional life after she published her first book?

[23:43] The opportunities or experiences that have surprised her

[25:59] Kristin talks about the project in Kenya, where she witnessed how widows live on less than a dollar a day

[27:37] What were some of the cross-cultural differences and convergences between the widows' experiences in Nairobi, Africa vs. those in the US

[30:03] Now that her first book has been published, what is her next idea?

[31:04] How can we be supportive or helpful as family or friends without overtaking the widow?

[33:03] She shares some of the gems from Chapter 8, The best advice I never got: things widows know

[35:21] In her own experience, what's been the most challenging aspect of being a widow?

[37:25] How is she working through the “re-griefing effect”?

[39:31] The physical effects of grief & how it affected Kristin’s health

[41:42] The “loss spiral”: starts with losing one thing, then losing something else & it goes down from there

[42:40] One of the changes that creeped up on her

[44:53] What's she excited about going forward?

[45:55] What does she want people to take away from this episode?

Mentioned in this Episode:

A Widow's Guide to Healing by Kristin Meekhof

Chelsea Dinsmore at Live your Legend

Holocaust survivor Stephen Ross

Deepack Chopra

Architects of Change by Maria Shriver

How widows live on less than a dollar a day (in Kenya)

Parliament of World Religions

Huffington Post

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Sometimes, you commit to a few things and then life intervenes and throws a few more things on your plate, and it can sometimes get away from you. You feel like "how am I going to do all of this?", "what do I need to let go?", "how do I handle my own expectations for what I'd be able to do?" - That's what Charlie Gilkey & Angela Wheeler will chat about on this episode.

Key Takeaways:

[02:08] Charlie talks about the major products he has going on at once

[05:03] Angela points out that each project has many other mini-projects within it

[06:27] Self-care is about being gentler with yourself, not beating yourself up

[07:24] A venn diagram analogy on ‘the work’ and ‘the story about the work’

[11:01] Feeling frustrated with yourself - what is it getting you? what is it doing for you?

[13:56] Angela is harder on herself than on other members of the team

[14:35] We wouldn't ride a donkey the way we ride ourselves, because it would be inhumane

[15:21] You’re not a computer nor a robot, and can't work 24-7. You're human & stuff comes up

[16:29] How do you communicate with people when you have overcommitted and need help?

[18:00] Ego prevents us from asking for help, but not asking is the worst thing you can do

[21:58] Asking for help can be seen as a weakness

[23:40] Asking for help may feel like it's a 'taking'

[25:50] Always ask the yea-sayers & people you trust, if they're willing to help you

[28:25] Ask for help by welcoming people to be of service to you

[28:54] You matter just as much as somebody else

[30:55] How not to get there again by giving yourself enough room for a margin

[32:50] People confuse focus and capacity

[33:19] Proactive communication with others and with yourself

[34:27] Choosing the projects that matter to you

[38:53] Deciding what's really important and what to let go of, is hard, but worth it

[39:50] Defining what you want your good life to look like - rather than what others think

[40:18] Choosing projects and priorities that matter most to you and sticking to them

Mentioned in this Episode:

Live Your Legend

Start Finishing [book proposal]

Jeffrey Davis from Tracking Wonder

Rain Maker

"No" vs. "Not now"

Why strategic planning is so hard for creative people?

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Jordan Agolli is a young, but highly experienced entrepreneur who is also the host of the Teenage Entrepreneur. He started his first business when he was 14-years-old, and grew the company to 20 employees by the time he was 18-years-old. In 2014, he founded Teenage Entrepreneur, which is a platform focused on educating and inspiring the younger generation to pursue entrepreneurship. The show has listeners in 65 countries. In 2015, he was hired as the director of operations for a company that helps business owners market their business through the Internet. Jordan's primary focus and passion is fixing operational breakdowns, building and maintaining relationships with clients, and managing day-to-day operations. On top of this, he is also the president of his bowling league, has a first degree black belt in a Japanese martial art. Jordan has his hands in a lot of projects, as do many Creative Giants. Charlie is excited to have him share his journey with us!

Key Takeaways:

[02:24] Jordan shares his story on starting his own business when he was only 14-years-old.

[05:11] Growing a company by using a hyper-local directory and cheap marketing.

[09:27] A marketing strategy that leveraged being young and ambitious ‘high schoolers’

[11:01] College didn’t work for Jordan, so he worked full-time in his own business.

[13:08] What was it about college that he didn't like, wasn't for him.

[13:47] Jordan never wanted college to work for him.

[15:17] Institutions box you into a system & that was his issue with school from the get go.

[18:08] There’s a false perception that overestimates high schoolers’ understanding of the ‘online world’.

[18:17] Fizzle was the first resource to teach Jordan about the online business world.

[19:46] The Internet and social media can be leveraged to market and grow your business.

[21:16] How Teenage Entrepreneur was born

[22:32] Discovering podcasting and the online community is what brought him to where he is today

[23:58] How he got involved in managing operations and talking to sought-after CEOs

[29:28] It’s better to focus on one thing than to spread yourself thin

[30:33] Three major lessons Jordan has learned

[34:03] Putting yourself out there and the value of experience

[35:12] In order to grow and take it to the next level, he'll be going back into the entrepreneurial world

Mentioned in This Episode:

The Aha! connection

Yelp

Angie’s List

Fizle

Chase Reeves

Podcast Movement

Snap Chat

Tweeter

Instagram

Vine

John Dumas

Chris Ducker

Chase Jarvis

David France

Babson entrepreneurship forum

Global entrepreneurship program, for the United States

Suzan Scot’s Fierce Conversations

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Rebecca is a serial entrepreneur who creates problem solving consumer goods that are in the hands of over half million people around the world, and have been featured in the Wall Street Journal, the New York Times, multiple episodes of ABC's Shark Tank, Good Morning America and more. Rescate began her entrepreneurial career at the age of 25 in New York City. In the past decade, she has built four brands with unique creative products, including: CityKitty, HoodiePillow, Top.Down Planner, and Blankie Tails; while raising 3 children and residing in Yardley Pennsylvania with her husband. Rebecca joins Charlie to discuss one of his favorite topics: planning; and about how plans drive us toward success and happiness and also create luck.

Key Takeaways:

02:12 – What lead Rebecca to create Top.Down Planner

03:41 – The methodology that Top.Down planning is based on

04:59 – What if we just focus on the things that are of high value to us

07:36 – The importance of incorporating values in planning

09:04 – The ‘values exercise’ in Top.Down Planners

11:11 – When your values don’t align with how you are doing business

14:06 – How not to say ‘yes’ to everything and prioritizing your values in planning

17:12 – Difference between ‘planning’ and ‘planners’ or ‘schedulers’

21:09 – Spear-heading a re-education on planning

23:34 – Rebecca talks about Blankie Tails

25:16 – Rebecca talks about CityKitty

29:36 – Doubling down on Blankie Tails

31:53 – The 2016 version of Top.Down Planner and inventory management

33:58 – Some pros and cons of manufacturing products in the US

38:05 – Planning for and running four different businesses

41:56 – The power of planning

43:20 – From baby steps to bigger plans

Mentioned in This Episode:

CityKitty

HoodiePillow

Top.Down Planner

Blankie Tails

the Pareto Principle

Franklin Covey

3.Purpose

Staples

Office Depot

Google Calendar

Daniela Port's desire mapping

Uber

Steve Jobs

Uggs

Instagram

Kitchen Aide

Shark Tank

Calphalon

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Susan Piver makes a reappearance on this week's episode to talk about meditation. Susan was featured on episode four of The Creative Giant Show, so be sure to check out her first interview with Charlie after you listen to this one. Susan Piver has an international reputation for being an exceptionally skillful meditation teacher and shares valuable insight on how to start a meditation practice and make it stick.

Key Takeaways:

[2:50] Susan's book, Start Here Now, is out.

[5:50] What really counts as meditation?

[7:45] In meditation you don't have to stop thinking.

[10:45] Every person Susan knows thinks they're not disciplined in their practice.

[15:55] The answer is right in front of you, but we often prefer to get distracted and take shortcuts.

[18:10] Being present means letting go of what you know.

[20:00] Susan talks about her 'Aimless Wandering' practice.

[22:25] Practicing in the beginning can make you anxious, but it naturally goes away overtime.

[25:20] How long -really- is three minutes?

[28:55] There are three kinds of laziness. Susan explains.

[33:30] What does it mean to be a Buddhist?

[37:45] What can you do if you're not near a Buddhist/meditation center or community?

[41:35] Charlie talks about his own practice.

[46:25] Does meditation get easier?

[48:35] Give yourself 5-10-15 minutes to be in the present.

Mentioned In This Episode:

http://www.productiveflourishing.com/what-counts-as-meditation/

https://insighttimer.com/

The Heart of Unconditional Love by Tulku Thondup

The Sacred Path of The Warrior series by Chogyam Trungpa

http://susanpiver.com/

Start Here Now by Susan Piver.

http://www.productiveflourishing.com/episode-four-susan-piver/

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Angela Wheeler joins Charlie Gilkey in today's podcast episode. Charlie and Angela talk on how sometimes it's difficult to practice self-care and take care of all of your responsibilities at the same time. The two explore the subject of self-care and talk on why they're not feeling 100% at the best on the show.

Key Takeaways:

[2:05] Charlie and Angela weren't in the best of places today.

[3:20] Maybe we use the excuse of not feeling well to avoid responsibilities.

[4:15] Look at your schedule two weeks in the past and assume it'll be the same.

[6:30] Not looking your best is different for everybody.

[9:00] Self-care is the highest priority.

[14:00] When is that thing you're putting off going to get done?

[17:40] Don't be a victim of the 9-5 schedule.

[20:50] Are the important things showing up in your schedule?

[24:40] Remember, you can't do everything.

[28:00] Take care of yourself, your priorities, and do your best.

[29:50] What are you doing to take care of yourself and what are you doing today to build a better tomorrow?

Mentioned In This Episode:

http://www.productiveflourishing.com/

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Nathalie Molina Niño launched her first tech startup at the age of 20 and then later graduated with a degree in playwriting at Columbia University. In 2012, Nathalie co-founded a non-profit at the Athena Center for Leadership studies of Barnard College at Columbia University, where she advises young women entrepreneurs. Nathalie talks on how she got her head start in the tech industry and why she's working to fix the large gender and minority gap in the tech world.

Key Takeaways:

[3:05] How did Nathalie get started in her career?

[7:00] Why did Nathalie burn out?

[9:30] We often forget we can define our boundaries.

[11:30] We stop making good decisions after about 36-40 hours of work.

[12:10] How did Nathalie get involved in her non-profit Entrepreneurs@Athena?

[13:40] Nathalie is much more open now about talking about the core problems in tech.

[16:30] There's a big group of people who are lazily uninformed about the gender and minority divide.

[19:20] The tech culture is toxic and unfriendly to women.

[22:10] Why aren't there more women in C-level positions? Nathalie explains why.

[24:20] How can we make corporate and tech culture more friendly?

[27:45] Nathalie believes we should focus on building healthy workplace culture on the entrepreneurial side of things, not in slow-moving corporate.

[31:00] Charlie shares why he believes more women are leaving corporate to start their own businesses.

[35:40] Nathalie talks about Power To Fly and why she got involved.

[40:00] How did Power To Fly get 6+ million dollars in investor funds?

[47:40] What's the most unanticipated challenge Nathalie is currently facing?

[50:40] The one takeaway you need to know about Nathalie? You can be successful and still be kind.

Mentioned In This Episode:

http://www.productiveflourishing.com/episode-18-factoring-tech-startup-world-thursday-bram/

https://www.powertofly.com/

http://nathaliemolina.biz

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Charlie Gilkey and Angela Wheeler have been together for over 18 years and discuss on today's podcast what's it like working with each other. Angela shares her struggles on leaving her academia career, catching up with Charlie's four year learning curve in the business, and surviving a near-death experience. Charlie and Angela talk on the importance of understanding each other's cycles and rhythms and to have boundaries in the relationship where it's not all work and no play.

Key Takeaways:

[1:50] Angela talks a little bit about her background.

[4:30] Working with your partner is great, but there can also be bumps in the road.

[7:40] Charlie and Angela have been in business together since 2010.

[8:40] What kind of challenges did Angela face when she joined Charlie's business?

[15:50] Charlie and Angela have been together for 18 years and have had a lot of time to grow together.

[20:00] The difference in income can be awkward with your partner.

[25:50] Working around your partner's natural rhythm can be challenging.

[30:45] Three years after the car crash, the couple can finally talk about what happened.

[31:30] Charlie talks about Angela's near-death experience.

[37:10] After Angela's accident, Charlie had to plan for Angela not to be a part of the business and setup the business up accordingly.

[43:10] Admitting your weaknesses can be hard, but once you do, you can build a stronger business.

[47:40] So what is it like working with your life partner?

[51:00] You can share something meaningful together.

[52:40] Be transparent with your partner and have an open communication with them at all times.

Mentioned In This Episode:

The Five Love Languages by Gary D. Chapman

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Linda Kaplan Thaler is an advertising luminary and author who is also the cofounder of the Kaplan Thaler Group and chairman of Publicis New York. She has created many iconic advertising campaigns such as Kodak Moments and the Aflac duck. She is a native New Yorker who has co-authored three bestselling books: Bang!: Getting Your Message Heard in a Noisy World, The Power of Nice, and The Power of Small. Her newest book is called Grit to Great, which she also co-authored with her business partner Robin Koval. The book takes readers back to the old-fashioned concept of it taking grit to make you successful, rather than relying on your talent, luck, or ability. Linda joins Charlie on the show to talk about that and much more.

Key Takeaways:

02:02 – How Linda met Robin Koval.

03:57 – The idea of having grit and getting the idea to write a book about it.

07:42 – Grit never expires and the idea of retirement.

12:34 – The “lure” of retirement and how retirement should really be doing a job that you love.

16:26 – The self-esteem movement.

20:06 – Grit can be found in anybody no matter the age.

22:58 – Learn to accept failure.

25:32 – “Comfort addiction” and how we are a culture that doesn’t know how to be bored.

28:50 – Which grit builder practice Linda feels is the hardest for her at this stage in her life.

32:02 – The power of habit.

38:50 – The most unanticipated challenge Linda is currently facing.

40:12 – Everybody can get to where they want to go. Grit is the formula that gets you there.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Kaplan Thaler Group

Publicis New York

Bang!: Getting Your Message Heard in a Noisy World

The Power of Nice

The Power of Small

Robin Koval

Grit to Great

Michael Bloomberg

Colin Powell

Steven Spielberg

Michael Jordan

Jack Ma, Alibaba

Sherry Lansing, Paramount Pictures

James Henry, In a Fisherman’s Language

James Dyson

Neil Postman, We’re Amusing Ourselves to Death

Todd Kashdan and Robert Biswas-Diener, The Upside of Your Dark Side

Paula Radcliffe

James Patterson

Stephen King

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Jacquette Timmons is a financial behaviorist who helps her clients figure out how to connect their money to life in a real and meaningful way. She offers unbiased advice and helps people gain insight and clarity that they might not otherwise get on their own. She helps people blend the emotions of money with the math of money so they can move forward with their financial goals and take control. She is the founder of Sterling Investment Management, Inc. and also wrote a book titled Financial Intimacy, How to Create a Healthy Relationship with Your Money and Your Mate. Her work has been featured many places including CNN, HLN, Fox, and NPR, among others. Jacquette joins Charlie on the show today and talks about the importance of having discussions about our money as well as much more.

Key Takeaways:

01:43 – How Jacquette got started as a financial behaviorist.

05:54 – What does a financial behaviorist do?

09:09 – Understanding decision making around money is a more irrational thing and the trends and differences between the way men and women make decisions about money.

14:13 – People not really having true conversations about their money and not seeing that it’s an ongoing conversation and why that is.

21:15 – Having to make hard financial decisions such as putting money toward the care of a pet.

26:10 – Some things to do to help make those difficult financial decisions.

30:33 – Recognizing and dealing with the fact that everything about money is emotional and that our decisions we make about money are often based on emotions.

34:48 – Jacquette’s book, Financial Intimacy, How to Create a Healthy Relationship with Your Money and Your Mate.

37:56 – Surprising feedback Jacquette has gotten about her book and finding help in knowing other people’s situations.

42:24 – Financial success doesn’t start in your wallet.

48:44 – Being smart with money is a skill.

50:28 – The most unanticipated challenge Jacquette is currently facing.

54:11 – Money is never just about money.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Sterling Investment Management, Inc.

Financial Intimacy, How to Create a Healthy Relationship with Your Money and Your Mate

CNN

HLN

Fox

Black Enterprise

NPR

The Wall Street Journal

Dan Ariely, Predictably Irrational

Carnegie Institute of Technology

The Small Business Lifecycle

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Sarah Jones is the founder of Introverted Alpha, a place to help introverted men attract women naturally. Her work has been featured in various places including Cosmo and Business Insider and many other. Along with being a dating coach, Sarah also uses Introverted Alpha to help support the cause of ending human trafficking. She joins Charlie on the show today to discuss these topics and much more.

Key Takeaways:

01:46 – How Sarah got started doing what she does now.

04:50 – How Sarah found her niche.

08:40 – The differences in coaching men and women.

11:05 – The friend zone.

13:32 – Sarah discusses her discomfort level of coaching and talking to men about their sexuality.

16:23 – The pickup community.

20:21 – The idea of men just wanting sex.

23:49 – Whether or not Sarah has received any backlash against what she’s doing.

27:37 – Sarah learning to be a more strategic thinker in what she was doing.

34:10 – Sarah’s cause around human trafficking.

37:48 – The link between men’s sexual desire and human trafficking.

42:44 – The most unanticipated challenge Sarah is currently facing and why she thinks that’s a challenge.

48:50 – Find the things that you love about yourself and do things that will nourish that.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Introverted Alpha

Cosmo

Business Insider

The Good Men Project

YourTango

The San Francisco Chronicle

The Game, Neil Strauss

Reddit

Ramit Sethi, Zero to Launch

Not For Sale

Managing for Results, Peter Drucker

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Charlie takes a few minutes in this episode to discuss the future of the show and the direction he would like to take it.

Key Takeaways:

00:47 – “Bullets, cannonballs, and tripwires.”

01:36 – Why Charlie wanted to get to 50 episodes.

03:33 – People saying they want more of Charlie on the podcast.

04:28 – Charlie not wanting the show to be another “how-to” show.

05:00 – How to figure out the two tensions of people wanting more Charlie on the show and it not being a “how-to” show.

07:08 – The challenges of keeping the show at 30 minutes and it still being really good.

09:35 – Going forward with the show and what that looks like.

10:10 – The publishing schedule of the podcast.

12:14 – Going through and experimental phase with the show.

13:01 – Ways to help out with the show.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Great by Choice, Jim Collins

Donald Rumsfeld

productiveflourishing.com/podcast

charlie@productiveflourishing.com

productiveflourishing.com/contact

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Brigitte Lyons is a media specialist who founded B, a boutique PR agency helping organizations and individuals move their ideas. She teaches entrepreneurs how to take media outreach into their own hands. Brigitte is an advocate for emerging talent, and those she has helped have gone on to get coverage from cnn.com, The Huffington Post, Elle Décor, espn.com, and more. She encourages people to be relentlessly focused on what they’re doing in order to get their work out there to make an impact in the world. She joins Charlie on the show today to discuss her work and much more.

Key Takeaways:

01:28 – How Brigitte got started in the PR business.

04:32 – Is PR even relevant anymore?

07:58 – The value of a publicist for some people and why people come to Brigitte.

14:24 – Brigitte making the switch to work with more creative types and artists and some of the challenges that came along with that.

16:22 – Why Brigitte is happier getting out and working one-on-one, face-to-face with people rather than just sitting at her computer by herself.

19:40 – The idea that big problems need big teams.

21:55 – Why Brigitte doesn’t want to work solo by herself but also doesn’t necessarily think being a big company is for her either.

26:10 – What scares Brigitte about the transition she is making.

33:04 – Ryan Holiday’s methods for PR and what he does.

35:18 – Why Brigitte’s work matters so much to her.

41:19 – The cause, topic, or issue Brigitte feels the strongest about but isn’t using her voice for and why that is.

47:25 – Be relentless focused on what you’re doing to make a bigger impact with your work.

Mentioned in This Episode:

B

cnn.com

Elle Décor

The Huffington Post

espn.com

Multipotentialites

Forbes

The New York Times

Twitter

Gallup

Reddit

Tara Gentile

charity:water

IDEO

Apple

Basecamp

Duarte

The Energy Project, Tony Schwartz

Action Station, Marianne Elliott

Ryan Holiday

All Marketers are Liars

Trust Me, I’m Lying

TechCrunch

Gawker

American Apparel

Amazon

Cal Newport, So Good They Can’t Ignore You

Black Lives Matter

Airbnb

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Ryan Haack is an author, blogger, and speaker who was born without a left hand. In 2011, he launched his website, livingonehanded.com, in an effort to help people embrace the things that make them different and realize that they are still valuable and important. He writes about his experiences as someone who was born with a physical difference and tries to give hope to others who may be dealing with the same kind of thing. He also speaks at schools on this subject and recently released his first children’s book titled Different is Awesome. Ryan joins Charlie on the show today to discuss his work and his perspective on what it means to be different as well as much more.

Key Takeaways:

01:31 – Why and how Ryan started his website back in 2011.

04:06 – Ryan going most of his life not even thinking about the fact that he only had one hand and then suddenly being more aware of it after starting his website.

08:43 – What Ryan’s arm looks like and why he is so comfortable talking about it.

13:18 – Always thinking people want to help you because they pity you and not viewing it as them just being nice and accept it.

18:32 – The dual nature of saying you’re not any different than anybody else when you have a disability but also bringing awareness to the fact that you are different.

21:49 – Ryan’s Kickstarter for his book.

28:20 – The message of Ryan’s book.

31:45 – Seeing the value in yourself will make you see the value in other people.

33:56 – Ryan hopes that people will feel encouraged and valuable because of the work he is doing.

Mentioned in This Episode:

livingonehanded.com

Different Is Awesome

Xanga

W.E.B. Du Bois

Brené Brown

Glenda Watson Hyatt

The Art of Asking, Amanda Palmer

Kickstarter

Kyle Maynard

Judith Caseley, Harry and Willy and Carrothead

Wes Molebash

Kyle Scheele

InterVarsity

Sleeping at Last, Ryan O’Neal

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Willie Jackson is the founder and publisher of Abernathy, a magazine for black men. He is also a tech consultant and a member of Seth Godin’s Domino Project. He is an advisor and has worked with several bestselling authors and entrepreneurs as well as speaking regularly at conferences. Previously, he served as the director of Web optimization for W3 EDGE, an interactive Web development and marketing agency. Abernathy is his latest project that was started partly because of the events in Ferguson and the Black Lives Matter movement. Willie joins Charlie on the show to discuss the weighty issues of race and police brutality as well as much more about his career.

Key Takeaways:

02:24 – Willie leaving working in consultancy and getting in to doing his own thing.

06:38 – Why Willie didn’t like the corporate business world.

12:10 – Starting W3 EDGE and how the idea formed.

16:08 – Some of the challenges with W3 EDGE.

21:15 – The importance of taking the time to connect with other people and acknowledge how hard things can be.

24:01 – Why and how Willie formed Abernathy and his feelings on the Michael Brown story.

33:27 – Abernathy being a magazine specifically for black men and issues of race that aren’t talked about enough.

42:06 – The case about Sandra Bland.

47:09 – What Willie has learned from launching and growing Abernathy.

51:43 – Willie wanting people to know that he cares about people being touched by what Abernathy is about and benefitting from it.

Mentioned In This Episode:

Abernathy

Seth Godin’s Domino Project

Black Lives Matter

Lift Off Retreat

INROADS

W3 EDGE

Accenture

Michael Brown

Mark Zuckerberg

Yoyodyne

Yahoo

Worse Than Slavery

Nate Silver

Hillary Clinton

Sandra Bland

Basecamp

MailChimp

The YEC

abernathymagazine.com/launch

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Many of us don’t know exactly what we want to be. We wander through life dissecting our likes and our wants without realizing this is a process which gives our calling time to present itself. Life’s dopamine shots of getting it now can interfere with your ability to share your gift. If you write call yourself a writer, if you paint a painter, etc. If you believe it others will too. Jeff’s work embodies his past experiences and it shares how he overcame his previous assumptions about what path he should be on. He believes we should ask ourselves “If I am in the same place as I am today 10 years will I regret it?”

Key Takeaways:

[1:20] I always thought I would be an artist

[3:17] Building an online community for a non-profit

[4:59] I had a freelance writing website but no personal brand

[7:02] Who exactly got pregnant and being in a dangerous place

[10:05] Coaching, teaching and leading

[13:45] The 7 steps you need to achieve your dreams

[18:10] Expand the use of “finding your calling”

[19:34] Are we too busy to listen to our lives

[23:22] Assumptions about paths you find in life

[27:21] Everybody quit their job, which was not my intention

[28:12] I wrote this book to touch people and it’s working

[30:09] Organizational challenges and acquiring discipline

[33:20] The responsibility of sharing your gift with the world

Mentions:

TheArtofWork

Goinswriter.com

TheSmallBusinessLifecycle

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The impression that you make while connecting on social media can help you land the perfect job or it can haunt you. Your online personal brand is what the world sees so, make certain it is authentically you. It may be difficult in the future to cover up any regrets. In this 24 hour socially engaged world realize, it is ok to say no and ok to step offline for Its important to reasses the image you want to promote, as well as the path you want to take towards your future.

Key Takeaways:

[1:34] Stephanie took note of powerhouse women in social media

[4:14] The passion for video weaves through Stephanie’s life

[6:08] Tips and Tricks in video got me noticed

[8:24] Ahead of the curve using YouTube annotations but not on mobile

[10:30] The book that helped developed my personal brand

[11:28] Take a step back and it’s ok to say no

[13:28] Talking about the toll it takes to be successful

[15:17] Working for someone else was the next step

[17:04] There were no notifications on Twitter or Facebook at the time

[20:00] Get used to the stats and then measure your success in reactions

[24:06] You are connected but you are really not connected

[25:41] The impression of connecting

[28:00] What you put on social media should be who you are, it matters

[31:43] Your digital footprint

[33:52] Can you have an after 5 profile and a business profile

[35:20] A day job that carries over into managing a digital lifestyle

[37:52] Finding the time for everything is a challenge

[39:43] Take into consideration the digital footprint you are leaving

Mentions:

Trust Agents

• Chris Brogan

Moto 360

Alone Together

• Sherry Turkle

My Savvy Life

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Charlie talks briefly on the show today about an old Native American parable about an evil wolf and a good wolf and which wolf we feed. It’s about the battle that goes on inside of us. Do we choose to feed the good or the bad in us? He addresses that in this week’s show.

Key Takeaways:

00:50 – Native American parable.

01:58 – It’s not just one choice of which wolf we are feeding. It’s a long history of making that choice.

04:21 – Whatever energy we put into the world, we get back.

05:05 – Choose to feed the good wolf, even in those moments when it seems easier to feed the bad wolf.

Mentioned In This Episode:

David Gray, “Flame Turns Blue”

Amos Lee

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James Victore is a graphic artist, author, and activist who describes his art as “sexy” and strives to help people find their creative courage through talks and workshops. He has numerous high-profile clients and his posters have been displayed in places like the Museum of Modern Art in New York and the Library of Congress, among others. In addition to his life-changing talks and workshops, James also reaches people through his YouTube video series Burning Questions where he answers questions about life, love, and work. On top of all that, James also has a book out called Victore, Or Who Died and Made You Boss? He lives in Brooklyn and works with his wife, Laura. James joins Charlie on the show to talk about his life, work, and much more.

Key Takeaways:

02:27 – James’ first gig.

04:26 – Moments in James’ career that made him realize he needed to do his own art and not try to be like somebody else.

08:15 – Practicing creative courage.

11:22 – Artists and designers understanding that their work is a gift.

13:55 – The tension of wanting to create what you love but also having to pay the bills and work within the restrictions of a company.

18:38 – James not conforming to what other people want, his “sexy” brand, and walking the line between sacred and profane.

21:18 – Deciding when to take jobs and when not to and making those decision based on what makes you happy and not just because you need the money.

26:45 – The idea of the reluctant hero.

36:20 – The most unanticipated challenge James is currently facing.

40:13 – When people ask James what he’s most proud of, it’s always his sons.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Burning Questions

YouTube

Museum of Modern Art

The Louvre

Library of Congress

Art Directors Club

Brno Biennale

Adobe

MailChimp

Starbucks

Bobbi Brown Cosmetics

Aveda

Time and Esquire magazines

Moet & Chandon

Yohji Yamamoto

Abrams Publishing

Victore, Or Who Died and Made You Boss?

School of Visual Arts

Jeffrey Davis

Maslow’s hierarchy of needs

Julian Schnabel

Joseph Campbell

Star Wars

Dead Poets Society

Will Smith

Your Work as a Gift

Victory Lab

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Known as the Suitcase Entrepreneur, Natalie Sisson has been traveling the world and living out of her suitcase since 2006 while also running a successful online business from her laptop that generates a six-figure income. She is a number-one bestselling author, podcaster, speaker, and adventure and is on a mission to help entrepreneurs create true freedom in their lives by 2020. Natalie joins Charlie on the show today to discuss her adventuresome lifestyle, how she grew her business, upcoming changes, and much more.

Key Takeaways:

2:04 – How Natalie got started in entrepreneurship and what made her want to do it.

4:35 – Natalie’s first business and what ultimately led her to leave and move on.

8:37 – Challenges Natalie faced in the first years of Suitcase Entrepreneur and what she saw as the most challenging areas of business.

12:11 – Spark moments in the first years of Suitcase Entrepreneur that let Natalie know she should keep going.

13:20 – Something Natalie learned that she wishes someone had told her before she started.

18:25 – The balance between always talking about yourself and your experiences but using that to help teach others.

19:33 – The process Natalie took in writing and publishing her book.

25:27 – Getting over the fear of asking people to support your work and help you.

28:38 – Natalie’s views on freedom.

31:41 – New things and changes coming up in Natalie’s life and work and what led to making those changes.

36:33 – The most unanticipated challenge Natalie is facing right now.

37:36 – Be true to yourself and comfortable with whatever decision you make at the time.

Mentioned in This Episode:

suitcaseentrepreneur.com

Freedom Plan Program

Facebook

Connection Point Systems

FundRazr

Seth Godin

Jonathan Fields

Fresh in Fifteen podcast

Kickstarter

Scrivener

Pam Slim

The Art of Asking, Amanda Palmer

Tim Ferriss

Chris Guillebeau

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Sergeant Kevin Briggs is a retired California Highway Patrol officer who spent most of his time on the Golden Gate Bridge encouraging people not to commit suicide by jumping. He was nicknamed the guardian of the Golden Gate Bridge and has helped over 200 people make the decision not to end their life. After retiring, he continued his work by traveling worldwide to speak on the subjects of crisis management, suicide prevention, and leadership skills. He speaks and teaches at conferences and law enforcement departments, as well as consulting and advising major companies and corporations. His story has been featured in numerous magazines and newspapers, which includes him being a cancer survivor, dealing with heart issues, and going through a divorce. He is currently working on his autobiography set to release in July of 2015. Kevin joins Charlie on the show today to discuss his work and knowledge of crisis management, share some personal stories, and much more.

Key Takeaways:

02:35 – Kevin’s first encounter on the Golden Gate Bridge.

06:01 – The little amount of training Kevin had received before taking his first suicide call and why that is.

08:43 – The emotional journey Kevin goes through when taking a suicide call and how it changes his perspective on life.

11:06 – Kevin’s second suicide encounter.

12:57 – Handling compassion fatigue and vicarious trauma and Kevin’s own depression.

15:55 – The importance of police officers and others in that field of work getting help for their stress and depression they may feel after seeing the things that they see.

19:14 – What the Quality of Life Triad is and where that came from.

21:43 – The importance of self-care and the resistance Kevin faces from fellow officers.

25:14 – Why people are so reluctant to seek help.

27:55 – Kevin’s RELEASE model.

31:55 – Tips on how to listen to someone and help them without judging or telling them what they need to do.

33:45 – Kevin’s own personal situation he dealt with when finding out his son was cutting.

38:44 – The importance of communicating and talking with your family and friends.

Mentioned In This Episode:

The New Yorker Magazine

People Magazine

USA Today

Pivotal Points

Quality of Life Triad

RELEASE model

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The smartest thing Carla ever did with regards to writing her book is collaborating with a person who was just as emotionally involved as she was. She was so used to going full throttle all the time she needed to learn that you can ask for help or even quit it for a while and go back to it later. She found that using online collaboration tools allowed the words to flow and increased her and her partner’s productivity. The only part of the process she found difficult was when asking for blurbs, even when Venus Williams offered to write cover quote.

Key Takeaways:

[2:40] How Carla got to where she is today

[4:20] Blogging is great because there is instant feedback

[5:42] Simple teaching stemmed from simple learning techniques

[6:55] My name was cutesy because that’s what bloggers did

[9:04] People embraced my change

[9:59] Struggle is universal, it’s more than fitness

[11:30] Apologizing for what?

[11:59] Being processed oriented versus outcome oriented

[13:26] The smartest thing we ever did was become emotionally invested

[14:40] Sorry this letter is so long. I didn’t have time to make it shorter

[15:57] Splitting up the chapters helped us enjoy the tight deadline

[18:12] This is how I flow now

[19:53] Collaboration can open up so many ideas

[20:41] The book was the easy part, the blurbs caused the friction

[22:33] The cover quote was a reach

[23:58] The Art of Asking

[25:38] I rock the NO

[26:27] It was the right time to write the book

[27:20] Quitting and moving on doesn’t mean that you can’t go back to it

[27:54] Well where to now? What’s next?

[29:30] The beginning of the #wycwyc

[30:18] All of our struggles are the same

[30:59] Comfortability with yourself

Mentions:

CarlaBirnberg

wycwyc

TheArtofAsking - Amanda Palmer

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Ali Luke is an author, blogger, entrepreneur, and mother who blogs about writing on her website Aliventures. She is also the creator of Writers’ Huddle, a teaching community site for writers. She started writing online in 2008 and has since become a regular blogger on popular websites. She is also the author of Publishing E-Books For Dummies and the novel Lycopolis. Ali joins Charlie on the show today to talk about the challenges of being a working writer, mother, and entrepreneur, how having two small children has made her change the way she views her work and her business, offer advice for up and coming writers and bloggers, as well as much more.

Key Takeaways:

02:06 – How Ali got started in online writing.

04:28 – Knowing that jumping to blog writing was going to work as a long-term career and launching her first e-book.

05:58 – How easy it is to break into blogging.

08:14 – What staff blogging is.

09:18 – Why Ali enjoys waking up and writing every day.

10:45 – Switching from writing blogs to e-books and also her novel.

14:23 – How being pregnant and becoming a mother changed things in Ali’s career and writing.

19:13 – The challenge of balancing being an entrepreneur and being a mother.

25:04 – Some of the hardest aspects of going back to work after having children.

27:05 – The difficulty of making the transition from one thing to another.

34:49 – How the e-book world is growing and why that excites Ali.

38:20 – The fear people have of putting their work out there for people to see.

46:32 – The most unanticipated challenge Ali is currently facing.

51:07 – If Ali can succeed in being a mom, author, blogger, and entrepreneur, anybody can. There should be nothing stopping you.

Mentioned in This Episode:

Publishing E-Books For Dummies

Lycopolis

Aliventures

Writers’ Huddle

Copyblogger

Write to Done

Men with Pens

The Creative Pen

Problogger

Daily Blog Tips

Productive Flourishing

WordPress

Staff Blogging Course

Brian Clark

BuzzFeed

Dumb Little Man

Amazon

Kobo

Melissa Dinwiddie

NaNoWriMo

Stephen King

Fifty Shades of Grey, E.L. James

The Quotable Coach, Barry Demp

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Andrew Bennett is a former Fortune 500 corporate executive and started his career working as H. Ross Perot's personal assistant. Andrew teaches corporations his transformation framework, which he developed through his passion and understanding of magic. He uses three principles for incorporating change into a company – appear, disappear, and restore and in the episode he explains further how this framework has improved businesses and professional relationships. Andrew shares to Charlie his personal struggles and life story, finding meaning in his life, and his passion for magic.

Key Takeaways:

[2:05] Andrew talks about how he got started.

[6:45] When we get comfortable, we will miss important life-changing opportunities.

[10:10] Andrew talks about the first time he incorporated a magic trick in a business presentation.

[12:55] When Andrew hit rock bottom and lost all of his material possessions and was bankrupt, he knew that he had a higher purpose.

[20:30] We're not meant to 'just survive'. We're suppose to thrive and our scars enable us to thrive.

[29:30] Good leaders focus on making their employees better people.

[32:25] How has Andrew's magic helped him in business today?

[37:40] Andrew's framework is appear, disappear, and restore.

[39:40] What's Andrew's most unanticipated challenging that he's facing right now?

[43:20] The final takeaway? People don't realize there's a lot of power in hope.

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Melissa evangelizes that feeding your creative hungers is one of the fastest routes to happiness. As a happiness catalyst and creativity instigator Melissa empowers people to find and follow their callings, create their art and share their work because that’s how you will change the world.

An artist in multiple forms Melissa models living a full color life and shares her writings, artwork and music on her blog, Living a Creative Life where you can also find her podcast Live Creative Now.

Key Takeaways:

[1:04] Melissa lived in shades of gray and has transitioned to full color

[3:11] The sustainable calligraphy business

[4:48] A personal crisis that sent me into the gutter and then to create Living a Creative Life

[8:00] The universe tell you when it’s time. If you don’t listen it will hit you with a 2x4

[13:18] Understanding your creative process is key

[15:25] Melissa hadn’t been given the business gene. She was in the wrong line

[17:44] Even an abundance of praise can make you question your creativity. Mindset helps

[23:00] I don’t care it’s crap. Live in a creative sandbox with your ridiculously achievable goals

[24:47] How to work through the tension of achieving your goals and obtaining motivation

[32:25] Ultimate value refers to personal value and not necessarily technical skills

[36:25] Prolificness allows you to get it out there and then the ability to build upon it

[38:15] Finding the challenges and needs of others can be extremely satisfying. Love your job!

[41:41] Delegating tasks and letting go of things seems hard but it can free you to be in the flow

[46:29] Doing your creative thing is not self indulgent

Mentions In This Episode:

Mindset - Carol Dweck

TinyHabits - BJ Fogg

TheImperfectionManifesto

CreativeSandboxRules

750Words

Rainmaker

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Charlie talks today on the show about what it means to be a creative giant and why he uses that term, challenges a creative giant may face, what it means and how to “stand tall,” and more.

Key Takeaways:

01:13 – What creative giants are.

03:20 – The challenges creative giants face.

07:52 – Why the term “giant”?

09:05 – What usually happens when a creative giant goes to large events and conferences.

11:34 – Charlie’s fear of using the term “creative giant” publically.

12:21 – Being able to “stand tall.”

Mentioned In This Episode:

Productive Flourishing

Theodore Roosevelt

Marianne Williamson

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Mary Trunk has many titles to her name including painter, dancer, choreographer, and filmmaker and has been making documentary films for over 20 years. Her first feature length film, The Watershed, screened at over 30 film festivals worldwide and has won numerous awards. She then spent seven years filming her latest documentary Lost in Living. Another short documentary, The Past is in the Present: At Home with Gunther Schuller, co-produced with her husband Paul Sanchez, is also touring the festival circuit around the U.S., and she is currently working on a new hybrid documentary project, which will be a reflection on her past dance career and how that has influenced everything she does. Mary has a new interactive website that she is working on and also teaches film and video at three different colleges in California. In addition to all of that, she is also a mother to one daughter and living in Los Angeles, California.

Key Takeaways:

02:14 – How Mary got started doing the work that she does.

04:16 – The bridge of Mary’s dancing to making documentaries.

08:50 – The relationship between choreography and filmmaking.

13:36 – How Mary stuck with making a documentary that ended up being a seven-year project.

18:11 – What Mary learned from the process of making Lost in Living.

20:49 – Transitioning from Lost in Living to The Past is in the Present.

24:51 – What Mary calls herself with all the different things that she does – businesswoman, filmmaker, etc.

30:48 – How Mary balances all of her work and family priorities.

37:38 – New projects Mary is working on.

40:26 – The most unanticipated challenge Mary is currently facing.

43:20 – We’re all struggling. Everybody has their story. Everybody has their issues.

Mentioned In This Episode:

The Watershed

Lost in Living

The Past is in the Present: At Home with Gunther Schuller

This Woman’s Life

Art Center College of Design

Loyola Marymount University

Mount St. Mary’s University

UC Santa Cruz

My Mother Calls Me

San Francisco Art Institute

Marjorie Schlossman

Slamdance Film Festival

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Joan Sotkin is an author, coach, and businesswoman who helps people understand why they do what they do with their money and how to change their financial behaviors. In the 1980’s Joan built her own mail order business selling crystals and making over $30,000 a month, but her lack of business and financial skills led to her downfall and bankruptcy. This led her down the path of learning everything she could about business and financial management, even attending 12-step programs like Debtors Anonymous and Co-Dependents Anonymous. She eventually went on to start her website prosperityplace.com and write her book Build Your Money Muscles: Nine Simple Exercises for Improving Your Relationship with Money, which won two national awards. Joan joins Charlie on the show today to talk about what she has learned over the years and much more.

Key Takeaways:

01:51 – How Joan got started in her first business.

03:25 – Joan reaching the point where she had to give everything away.

06:39 – Things that led to Joan’s first business going under.

10:13 – Going from being big into the mail order business to learning how to do business using the Internet.

12:24 – Differences between starting a business with the Internet readily available and starting one before the Internet era.

15:49 – How do we connect on a deep level so that we’re connected and we’re not alone?

16:58 – Why it seems like as we becomes more technologically abundant our financial situations get worse.

19:34 – The importance of discipline and conscious living in your spending habits.

22:17 – The identity factor. Why do people who are pretty smart make really stupid decisions?

24:38 – How we know when our identity factor is kicking in.

27:33 – Where all our emotions and feelings attached around money come from and steps we can take to change them.

30:50 – It’s not about the money. It’s about you, your relation to yourself, and your relationship with the world around you.

31:15 – What area in Joan’s own relationship with money she is working on right now.

32:45 – Why it’s easier for Joan to manage debt than it is for her to manage savings.

33:47 – The most unanticipated challenge Joan is currently facing.

37:04 – When you love, accept, acknowledge, and appreciate yourself, you will get paid, and you’re going to be living a rich life.

Mentioned In This Episode:

prosperityplace.com

Build Your Money Muscles: Nine Simple Exercises for Improving Your Relationship with Money

Santa Monica Civic Auditorium

Wendy McClelland

AOL

Amazon

Google

McKinsey

SCORE

Facebook

The Millionaire Next Door

The Secret

Uncertainty, Jonathan Fields

Debtors Anonymous

Co-Dependents Anonymous

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Breanne Dyck is a strategist, coach, and consultant whose expertise is in distilling information, drawing key insights, and helping her clients achieve light bulb moments. She helps microbusinesses grow their revenues and their impact by applying the principles of adult learning. Her clients include speakers, authors, coaches, consultants, and other microbusiness owners, and she helps them achieve world-class results for their businesses and their customers. She has consulted on many products and courses, live events, and workshops for thought leaders, including New York Times and Amazon bestselling authors. Chris Guillebeau has called her a “course design rock star.” Breanne joins Charlie on the show today to talk about her extensive body of work, share knowledge, and much more.

Key Takeaways:

01:33 – How Breanne got started in her field of work.

06:05 – What made Breanne want to start her own business.

10:02 – When Breanne realized she could make courses and start helping people.

14:19 – Breanne is not a natural risk taker or experimenter.

17:39 – It’s the taking of action that produces learning.

20:55 – Learning in the higher level of mastery, as according to Bloom’s taxonomy.

25:56 – What the hack-first mentality is and the problem with it.

32:56 – Challenges Breanne faced once she started doing course building.

37:19 – Breanne likes to take theoretical knowledge and make it really practical and actionable, but found she was resisting doing that in the beginning.

42:39 – The challenge of being in a microbusiness but not having an infinite amount of time and resources to devote to making it perfect and the “curse of expertise.”

51:59 – Wanting to avoid the perception that we don’t know what we’re doing.

54:29 – The most unanticipated challenge that Breanne is currently facing.

56:40 – The pursuit of craftsmanship, of excellence, of doing amazing work is always a pursuit worth going after.

Mentioned In This Episode:

CreativeLive

New York Times

Chris Guillebeau

Amazon

Natalie Sisson

Tara Gentile

World Domination Summit

The Small Business Lifecycle

Bloom’s taxonomy

Mark Silver

“The Curse of Expertise”

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Val Groth is a former school social worker in the inner city schools of Chicago. She holds dual masters degrees in social work and educational leadership, which has helped her work with students in crisis. After her career as a social worker she entered the field of life coaching and works with clients around the world, helping them make positive transformations in their lives. She also hosts her own podcast, Inspirations With Val, which is top ranked on iTunes. It has received over 140,000 downloads per month and has listeners in over 130 countries. In addition to that, Val’s newest project is to build Chicago’s first boarding school for inner city students, The Ryan Banks Academy, set to open for the 2018-2019 school year. Val joins Charlie on the show today to talk about all of that and much more.

Key Takeaways:

02:30 – How Val got started and came to where she is now.

5:22 – Moments that started to pull Val out of her nervous, fearful shell she had as a child.

7:26 – What Val did after she got out of school.

09:47 – How Val got into life coaching.

11:29 – Some major lessons Val learned and challenges she faced when she first started out coaching.

19:00 – What lights Val up about the coaching work she does.

21:57 – We are living in a great day and age where it is very easy for people to create in ways that most help them thrive.

24:29 – How the idea for The Ryan Banks Academy came about.

27:36 – If Val got to a point where she had to choose between life coaching and Ryan Banks Academy, which would she choose and why?

32:23 – Ways people can support The Ryan Banks Academy.

34:20 – Lessons Val has learned since starting The Ryan Banks Academy.

36:09 – The most unanticipated challenge Val is currently facing.

38:08 – A mindset Val has that she feels needs to change.

40:06 – Val feels she is here to inspire people and to bring out the best parts of them.

Mentioned In This Episode:

Inspirations with Val Podcast

iTunes

Ryan Banks Academy

World Domination Summit

Michael Hyatt

ryanbanksacademy.org

Kickstarter

Eagle Rock

Honda

Hershey School

Hershey

The SEED School

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Srinivas Rao is a bestselling author and the host and founder of The Unmistakable Creative Podcast where he has interviewed over 500 people in an effort to inspire and encourage his listeners to stand out by being unmistakable. He is also the creator of The Instigator Experience conference and self-published his book The Art of Being Unmistakable. Srini joins Charlie on the show to talk about all of that, as well as offer various other insights into his entrepreneurship journey.

Key Takeaways:

01:04 – How Srinivas got started doing what he does now.

03:56 – How Srinivas figured out how to balance building his business around his love for surfing and just wanting to do that.

07:28 – The need for creative entrepreneurs to have some kind of physical anchor that helps them to do their work.

08:54 – A hard lesson Srinivas had to learn in building his business after going through a rough period.

15:51 – The moment Srinivas realized he was on the wrong path and needed to do something different.

17:27 – Whether Srinivas views himself as a better writer or a better interviewer.

21:44 – Some lessons Srinivas learned when he started writing his first book.

32:28 – Finding a safe place to fail so that you can succeed at the same time.

35:07 – Moments in Srinivas’ career where he knew that was exactly what he wanted to be doing.

38:43 – Srinivas’ advice for how to stick with projects and not kill them too soon.

42:23 – The most unanticipated challenge Srinivas is currently facing.

43:20 – Unmistakable work is about connecting ideas and dots and putting things together in a way that only you could.

Mentioned in This Episode:

The Unmistakable Creative Podcast

Wall Street Journal

The Art of Being Unmistakable

BlogCastFM

The Skool of Life

The Instigator Experience

Penguin Portfolio

Uncertainty, Jonathan Fields

Podcast Movement

Huffington Post

Gawker

Nick Denton

Rupert Murdoch

Fox

The Compass

John Bramblitt

Tim Ferriss

Unmistakable CEO blog

Seth Godin

Brené Brown

Sid Savara

Search Engine Journal

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Tara Gentile is an author and business strategist, who works with entrepreneurs and helps them design their personal “quiet power strategy” that will tap into their strengths and help them lead themselves where they want to go. She teaches her clients how to find what makes them most effective. Her work has been featured in Fast Company, Forbes, Design Sponge, and in the bestselling book The $100 Startup. She is also an instructor and speaker, teaching about entrepreneurship, money, and the new economy. She joins Charlie on the show today to talk about her journey and her work and share some of her insights on the entrepreneurial world.

Key Takeaways:

01:40 – How Tara got started doing what she does.

06:28 – The hardest lessons Tara learned during her first years of business.

09:58 – How Tara’s background in religious studies helped and also didn’t help in her early years of business.

13:23 – Figuring out how what you create aligns with people’s worldviews and with their needs and with their values.

14:29 – Entrepreneurs realizing that they’re solving the same problem everyone else is solving, but doing it in a way that’s completely unique to you.

15:42 – What Kick Start Labs is all about.

18:40 – How Tara balances being an introvert and doing the work that she does.

23:51 – How being a control freak can get in the way of being an entrepreneur and navigating a business.

28:37 – Moments in Tara’s career that made her know for sure this was what she wanted to be doing.

34:33 – What Tara is afraid of right now in her work.

37:57 – The most unanticipated challenge Tara is currently facing.

39:30 – Leverage what’s most effective for you.

Mentioned In This Episode:

Quiet Power Strategy

Fast Company

Forbes

Design Sponge

The New York Times

The $100 Startup, Chris Guillebeau

CreativeLive

Lebanon Valley College

Borders Books and Music

Kick Start Labs

Etsy

Pioneer Nation

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Chris Brogan is the CEO of Owner Media Group, a highly sought after professional speaker, coach, consultant, and author. He provides education and tools to help make people’s lives and businesses thrive by teaching them how to own the game they most want to win. He offers events and courses to help get them to that next level of ownership. He is also a New York Times bestselling author of eight books, Forbes has listed Chris as one of the must follow marketing minds of 2014, and his website has been listed as one of the 100 best websites for entrepreneurs. In addition to all that, he is also a husband and father who lives in Massachusetts. Chris joins Charlie on the show today to talk about his impressive body of work as well as much more.

Key Takeaways:

02:39 – How Chris got started.

03:58 – Chris started blogging in the days of dialup Internet 17 years ago.

04:48 – Monetizing blogging.

05:30 – Chris starting out in the area of social media.

06:29 – Chris being labeled as an Internet marketer.

08:26 – A lot of things in marketing and sales are broken, and there are really easy, simplistic ways to fix them.

11:06 – Good and useful content on the Internet.

11:55 – Chris’ books and publishing projects.

15:05 – The hardest lesson Chris learned in his first three years.

18:45 – Chris is the most confident and grounded that he’s ever been in his career right now.

21:00 – The shift from social media expert and blogging to owning/ownership.

29:00 – What Chris is afraid of right now in his career.

29:36 – Chris’ most unanticipated challenge he’s currently facing.

Mentioned In This Episode:

Owner Media Group

Disney

Coke

Google

GM

Microsoft

Caldwell Banker

Titleist, Scotts

Humana Health

Cisco

Sony USA

Richard Branson

SUCCESS Magazine

Paulo Coelho

Harvey Mackay

Steven Pressfield

Tony Robbins, Internet Money Masters

Forbes

Gene Simmons, KISS

AOL

Meerkat

Periscope

Twitter

Frank Kern

Plato

Jay Baer, Youtility

Trust Agents

Matt Holt and Shannon Vargo, Wiley

Stephen King

Minecraft

James and Claudia Altucher

New Marketing Labs

Brian Clark, Copyblogger Media

New York Times

Donald Trump

The Beach Boys, Brian Wilson

Macaulay Culkin, Home Alone

Joel Comm

World Domination Summit

Chris Guillebeau

Pioneer Nation

Online Course Maker

Jeff Walker, Product Launch Formula

GoDaddy

David Siteman Garland

Thinkific, Greg Smith

Google+

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Cory Huff is an actor and storyteller who also has a career in Internet marketing. He discovered search engine marketing in social media in 2004 and since then has worked on marketing and software programs for some of the world’s biggest companies. He started his business The Abundant Artist in 2009 as a way of teaching Internet marketing to his artist friends who were asking him for help. He’s helped dozens of artists since, and some of his artist friends and clients have gone on to sell their work for $20,000 or more. In 2014, Cory moved to France for 9 months and was able to grow his online business and advance his goal of helping 1,000 artists create a full time income so they can use their talents to change the world. In November of 2014 he was offered a book deal. He has since moved back to the United States and lives in Portland, Oregon with his wife. Cory joins Charlie on the show to talk about how he teaches artists to be empowered to take charge of their own art business, as well as many other topics.

Key Takeaways:

01:58 – Cory is pretty open about the fact that he grew up in a poor family, and he was the first person in his family to go to college.

05:45 – The Abundant Artist was originally something Cory started as a side project.

07:16 – Shortly after moving to Portland, Cory got a job working on the sales floor for a search engine marketing company but was also a performer and hung out with artists in his spare time.

11:31 – Cory has always done acting on the side.

12:40 – Corey built his business as a way of creating a flexible lifestyle for himself so that he could do the art that he wanted to make.

14:10 – The two biggest problems that most artists have are fear and lack of information.

17:38 – There’s in general not a sharing of knowledge among the fine art community on how to make an art career work.

22:06 – There has never been a better time to be an artist than right now.

32:56 – Cory’s mantra for the last couple of years has been “fail harder.”

Mentioned In This Episode:

The Abundant Artist

Pacific Northwest College of Art

Rhode Island School of Design

Patreon

Gwenn Seemel

The Art of Asking, Amanda Palmer

Jonathan Coulton

Macklemore & Ryan Lewis, “Thrift Shop”

Wieden and Kennedy

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Julie Daley is a teacher, writer, and coach who works with people around the world in emotional intelligence, conscious embodiment, leadership potential, spontaneous awakening, the sacred feminine, finding one’s purpose, healing the pain of the past, and disconnecting from negative conditioning. She started her journey in 2001 when she became a certified creativity and business teacher at Stanford and received coaching certification from the Coaches Training Institute and the International Federation of Coaches. She also works with those who have lost loved ones in 9/11 as well as those directly affected by the shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary. In addition to all of that, Julie enjoys dancing to 5Rhythms, writing prose and poetry, process painting, and spending time with her grandchildren. She joins Charlie on the show to talk about her journey and her work.

Key Takeaways:

02:46 – Julie teaches creativity courses at Stanford as well as writing courses.

03:08 – Julie went to Stanford at age 42 and graduated at age 45 with her bachelor’s degree.

09:37 – The class Julie teaches is really about regaining and reclaiming that trust in ourselves and in the unseen world and in the mystery of life.

10:53 – One of the biggest things that gets in the way of creativity is the voice of judgment.

14:18 – Julie has spent time working with people directly affected by the Sandy Hook shootings and has worked with families of 9/11.

21:44 – Julie now offers a program she teaches where she combines what she’s done at Stanford with what she has experienced and knows about the sacred feminine.

28:38 – Men and women can’t choose to not coexist. We need each other.

32:25 – One of the most important things that we can do right now is to feel.

41:02 – You have exactly what you need to navigate whatever comes your way, and what comes your way is always what you need in the moment.

Mentioned In This Episode:

Michael Ray and Rochelle Myers

Lucy Pearce

Tao Te Ching

David Kelley, IDEO

The Gender Knot, Allan Johnson

Danielle LaPorte

Gabrielle Roth, 5Rhythms

How to Enter the Creative Unknown

Sacred Flesh

Fierce Conversations, Susan Scott

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Wendy McClelland is a lifelong entrepreneur who started a small typing business after her divorce that eventually grew to what The New York Times called one of the best biz sites on the ‘net. She has overcome incredible odds, raising 3 children under 10 while running her growing business and then contracting E. coli, which put her in a body cast from neck to knee, having to completely stop her business and declare bankruptcy, and eventually having to relearn how to walk all together. Having overcome all of that, she was able to start over and chronicles her journey in her new book 27 Steps to Freedom: What Learning to Walk Again Taught Me About Success in Business & Life. Today Wendy provides marketing support and strategy for small to medium businesses. She joins Charlie on the show to discuss all of that and more.

Key Takeaways:

03:04 – Wendy started a small typing business to help make money after getting a divorce when her kids were young.

07:09 – Wendy figured out how to build her own website, and within three weeks The New York Times had picked it as one of the best sites on the Internet.

08:43 – Wendy started out with her online business at a time when all websites were HTML and there was no social media.

10:50 – Wendy says she has had a fearless and brazen personality most of her life and considers that a blessing for her.

12:44 – While Wendy’s business was growing and doing extremely well, she then became sick with E. coli.

18:29 – When you go through a trauma, you’re not going to have that same life again that you had before, yet you still can create an amazing new life for yourself.

26:07 – When you look at all the really amazing things that you can do, to do those things you have to let go of all the little small things that you might want to do instead. So learn to say no.

27:53 – Whatever challenges you’re facing, know that there are people that have walked the path before you who can guide you.

Mentioned In This Episode:

27 Steps to Freedom: What Learning to Walk Again Taught Me About Success in Business & Life

The New York Times

WordPress

Dreamweaver

AOL

Facebook

LinkedIn

ryze.com

Marie Curie

Mother Teresa

Nellie McClung

The Small Business Lifecycle

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John Warrillow is a successful entrepreneur who is the founder of The Value Builder System and author of the bestselling book Built to Sell: Creating a Business That Can Thrive Without You, which was recognized by both Fortune and Inc. Magazine as one of the best business books of 2011 and has been translated into 4 languages. His newest book, The Automatic Customer: Creating a Subscription Business in Any Industry, was released in February of 2015. John is a sought after speaker, the creator of the Sellability Score, has started and exited four companies, and has been recognized by B2B Marketing as one of the top business-to-business marketers in the United States. On top of all that, he has done five marathon courses, one Ironman Triathlon, and the L’Etape du Tour bike race, as well as being a husband and the father of two children. John joins Charlie on the show today to discuss his career, his two books, and more.

Key Takeaways:

02:03 – John started out in radio production with the idea that entrepreneurs would want to learn from other entrepreneurs.

06:11 – John sees his career as and entrepreneur as solving one problem at a time and making it a little bit better as he goes.

06:47 – After John sold his last company, he and his family moved to Europe for three years.

09:10 – John was born in England and lived there until he was five.

11:09 – The idea behind Built to Sell is to get out of that trap of not being able to sell and into more of a company that can scale beyond just you personally.

13:41 – One of the biggest reasons people exit their business is disability.

16:43 – John felt he didn’t give enough attention to the idea of recurring revenue in his book Built to Sell.

17:53 – The subscription business is changing dramatically.

21:19 – The subscription economy is the antithesis to the demand economy in a lot of ways.

23:44 – People are willing to pay for good content.

33:49 – John doesn’t see doing PR for his books and products as something he is good at and doesn’t particularly enjoy it.

Mentioned In This Episode:

Built to Sell: Creating a Business That Can Thrive Without You

The Automatic Customer: Creating a Subscription Business in Any Industry

Greig Clark, College Pro

Tim Ferriss

The E Myth, Michael Gerber

Seth Godin

Starbucks

AMC Theatres

Apple

Amazon

Patreon

Uber

The Wall Street Journal

The New York Times

Financial Times

The Wood Whisperer

Who Moved My Cheese?

Gary Vaynerchuk

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Sarah Bray is a wife and homeschooling mom who has spent the past nine years working with clients as a strategic designer, front-end developer, and nation-builder. She has consulted with over 100 clients on content strategy, product design, marketing strategy, brand and identity development, and online business development. Now she is mostly a writer who is about to finish up her new book Gather the People. She is a huge advocate for nation building as a people-first alternative to traditional marketing and business development and always has a lot of projects going on. She joins Charlie on the show today to talk about what she does and how she got to where she is.

Key Takeaways:

01:33 – Sarah started out as a Web designer.

04:11 – Sarah decided she wanted to care about what she was working on, so she shut down her Web design studio and started her own marketing company.

05:39 – Shortly afterwards, Sarah went to work for a software company in Washington State.

08:35 – Sarah gave herself three weeks to write her book, and she is now on the last week.

10:44 – People confuse risk and uncertainty, and that’s a huge mistake.

17:45 – The trick to wanting to put something out there, a big idea you have, is to reduce the scope of what you’re doing to something that’s really small, and then make that one small thing really well and fantastic.

21:10 – What is really hard about growing as an entrepreneur is competing with your past self all the time.

26:29 – Everything that we make and create has the potential to expand someone else’s world.

31:46 – Sarah also homeschools her kids.

40:21 – There’s conflict in everything that you learn, and sometimes that conflict involves other people.

Mentioned In This Episode:

Gather the People

Julianne Rhodes

Rework

Basecamp

Twyla Tharp

Digg

The Chairs Are Where the People Go – Misha Glouberman

Lori Pickert

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Jennifer Boykin is the creative visionary behind the midlife reinvention movement “Life After Tampons” who speaks, teaches, and writes about women who rise. She frequently contributes to major Internet sites and blogs regularly for The Huffington Post. Jennifer has experienced many losses in her life, including the death of her only daughter over 20 years ago. She joins Charlie on the show today to discuss dealing with loss, busting through fear, her website community at lifeaftertampons.com, and much more.

Key Takeaways:

01:36 – Jennifer experienced the death of a child over 20 years ago, which led to the start of her movement.

03:40 – Jennifer had always felt that motherhood was always necessary to her happiness but not sufficient so she went back to graduate school.

06:21 – The one rule at Jennifer’s website is they don’t talk about their loved ones and families so they don’t hide behind it.

08:04 – A lot of women spend so much time and energy devoting to family that when they finally have some time, money, and space, they don’t have the first clue about what they want to create.

11:25 – There is nobody talking about what Jennifer talks about on her website, and there are a lot of women who are looking for that sense of community.

12:09 – The biggest challenge for Jennifer has been getting up to speed on technology and staying current with it.

14:59 – Women have a deep yearning for a sense of meaning and purpose in life.

18:52 – Combine your urge for meaning and purpose with what your great loves are.

20:18 – Make it your business to know yourself.

26:39 – Every gain comes with a loss.

Mentioned In This Episode:

lifeaftertampons.com

Jonathan Fields

Pamela Slim

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In 2013, when Jake Ducey was 19, he dropped out of college to backpack the world. That then inspired him to write his first book Into the Wind, which he self-published, and it ended up making it to the top 300 on the Amazon bestseller list. He used the money from that book to build an orphanage in Guatemala and has since gained a strong online following and wrote his second book, The Purpose Principles. He has given a TEDx talk and has traveled the nation speaking to over 100 schools and corporations. This summer Jake will be joining The Warped Tour, touring 52 cities in 70 days. He joins Charlie on the show today to talk about his journey and the success he has achieved by following his own path.

Key Takeaways:

00:31 – Jake dropped out of college at the age of 19 to backpack the world.

06:20 – It wasn’t about quitting everything and going to the next country. It was about making a difference.

06:46 – Jake decided that if his first book worked out he would build an orphanage for Guatemala.

07:09 – Jake taught himself how to write, sold his books door to door, and it ended up making the Amazon bestseller list.

09:50 – Jake’s newest book is called The Purpose Principles because he had read The Success Principles by Jack Canfield, who also wrote the forward to the book.

16:28 – Jake will be emceeing The Warped Tour this summer and doing a high school tour of 50 high schools this spring.

21:37 – The Gallup polls for the fall of 2014 showed that 73 percent of Americans said they’re actively disengaged from their jobs.

23:00 – Jake believes success is feeling content and happy within ourselves.

25:08 – Jake is creating a TV show called Seeking Everyday Heroes.

Mentioned In This Episode:

Into the Wind

The Purpose Principles

Jack Canfield, Chicken Soup for the Soul

The Warped Tour

Brian Gadinsky, American Idol

The Success Principles

Bronnie Ware

John Gray

TEDxYouth

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Amazon

Start With Why, Simon Sinek

First Things First, Stephen Covey

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Thursday is the cofounder of Urgency, Inc., an online marketing agency focused on technical clients. She’s been blogging for over 10 years and has written for a variety of publications. She is a true renaissance woman whose interests include diversity in tech, the use of punctuation, crypto currencies, analytics impact on content strategy, gifs, and open source business models. She is a cofounder of PDX Shelter, a Portland based nonprofit startup, and an organizer at PyLadies PDX. She comes on the show today to talk to Charlie about the issues women face in the tech industry and other things related to tech and business.

Key Takeaways:

1:59 – Thursday grew up in a family of entrepreneurs.

4:00 – Urgency, Inc. was launched at the beginning of this year.

8:01 – A lot of tech companies want to be seen as progressive and modern, but most of those companies are founded by white, straight men who are usually from a middle class to upper class background and don’t think about any experience other than their own.

11:48 – One key starting point in looking at startup companies is looking at how they hire.

15:12 – The number of women who are getting CS degrees is increasing dramatically, but the problem is more a question of keeping women in tech.

16:16 – Investors are less likely to work with women founders, especially women who have families.

21:45 – Being aware of the social issues taking place in companies is the first step to making change.

27:05 – GamerGate started as a posting by a guy who was upset with his ex-girlfriend who was a game developer, and he accused her of sleeping with game journalists to get better reviews and eventually turned into attacks on several women.

32:15 – The same tropes that Anita Sarkeesian has identified in video games are also very visible in other forms of media. It’s a very prevalent thought pattern.

35:40 – PyLadies is a Python user group which for just women.

37:10 – PDX Shelter is a project that uses technology to address homeless problems.

46:08 – Even though all of these problems in the tech business world may seem huge, just taking one step and doing one thing is on the way to solving them.

Mentioned In This Episode:

Urgency, Inc.

Go Daddy

Entrepreneur Magazine

PDX Shelter

PyLadies PDX

Kathy Sierra

GamerGate

Anita Sarkeesian

Startup Weekend

Matthew Fountain

Firebase

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Jonathon Button and Quinn Vandenberg left everything behind at age 25 and moved to Nicaragua. After 6 months of living among the locals, surviving off of just $2.00 a day, and immersing themselves in the culture, Life Out of the Box was formed. They work with local artisans to create unique handmade products that they then sell, and for every product sold they give a child in need school supplies. They have traveled all over Nicaragua giving school supplies to thousands of children and have since developed Life Out of the Box products from Nicaragua, Guatemala, and Morocco, giving thousands of school supplies to children in need.

Key Takeaways:

2:58 – Jonathon and Quinn had been dating for not even a year when the idea of living life out of the box started coming together. Shortly after, they quit their jobs and moved to Nicaragua.

3:46 – Life Out of the Box goes into developing countries, works with the local artisans there to create handmade products, sells them, and for each product sold they give a child in need school supplies.

4:12 – Each product sold has its own unique number on it that the customer can use to go online and look up and see exactly what child they gave school supplies to.

7:00 – They both lived in Nicaragua, completely immersed themselves in the culture, and then went to different schools asking them what they needed most and figured out that basic school supplies were the biggest need.

12:45 – A big part of a social venture is to be able to allow people in a country to create things and use that income to support their own family.

15:59 – They are up to 5,600 handmade bracelets made.

16:53 – Their goal this year is to give to 10,000 children.

19:56 – One thing they’re trying to figure out how they can give to children around the world without them actually being there.

26:13 – Since Jonathon and Quinn are also dating, they struggle with finding a balance between their working life together and their non-working life together.

35:51 – An unanticipated problem they have run into is the large number of people who want to be involved with Life Out of the Box.

Mentioned In This Episode:

Life Out of the Box

www.lifeoutofthebox.com

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Mike Ambassador Bruny’s mission is to help individuals discover their greatness and live it out. His latest project, Brand Inside a Brand, focuses on personal branding for the working professional. He is the author of Move the Crowd: 30 Days of Hip-Hop Affirmations to Change Your Life, as well as a speaker, certified life coach, an alum of the Boston based Leaders of Color Development Program, The Partnership, Inc., and a stay-at-home dad to his 10-month-old son. He talks to Charlie about how he got to where he is today, lessons he’s learned along the way, and how to take action on something you’re passionate about and make it happen.

Key Takeaways:

2:08– Working at Intel is where Mike learned to become a professional speaker and where the idea of Brand Inside a Brand was started.

3:28 – Mike created his own curriculum helping people create a brand inside a brand while at Intel.

5:43 – One challenge you can run into is that companies don’t want you to be your own brand.

7:03 – People who have a good, strong brand of their own are people who you wouldn’t even realize work for a company because they’re so independent.

8:29 – Part of your brand and what Mike teaches is to learn how to be more entrepreneurial, not become an entrepreneur.

11:09 – The idea of working for an employer for the intended length of your working career is obsolete. Most people move on from project to project.

15:21 – It’s about finding a job where you can show up and be the best of yourself, doing the things that you’re interested in, and the things that you’re interested in generating value.

21:35 – Mike sees hip-hop as a language of people.

24:05 – Mike has a vision of getting Seth Godin and Jay-Z on a stage together.

26:00 – Mike’s next project in the works is a community called “No More Reasonable Doubt,” a space where students of color can go to get his work and seek help.

29:27 – Mike organized an event for Charity: Water and helped raise $10,000 for them.

Mentioned In This Episode:

Brand Inside a Brand

Intel

Move the Crowd: 30 Days of Hip-Hop Affirmations to Change Your Life

The Partnership, Inc.

Ekaterina Walter

Justin Levy, Citrix

Scott Monty, Ford

Matt Cutts, Google

Robert Schofield, Microsoft

Guy Kawasaki, Apple

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Jay-Z

Charity: Water

Chris Brogan

Russell Simmons, Do You!

Andre Taylor

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Lucy Pearce is a number one bestseller on Amazon and has written several books on the subject of motherhood and women. Some famous titles include Moon Time, The Rainbow Way, and the Moods of Motherhood. She also has her own publishing company, Womancraft Publishing, that helps empower women and get their voices and books published. Lucy joins Charlie today to talk about how you can unleash your inner creative and not feel guilty about raising children while you're doing it. They also talk about how men can better support creative women and mothers, how to be a productive woman, and more today on Productive Flourishing.

Key Takeaways:

3:10 – Lucy comes from a large family of creatives.

7:00 – When the creative woman can not express herself properly, then her dark side will come out more and more.

10:10 – Multitasking is important at times, but you'd get more things done if you focus on one task at hand.

13:40 – You have to prioritize time for yourself and your creative outlet. Talk to your partner and work with each other's schedules.

15:20 – Have small creative side projects that you can pick up anywhere you are to help maintain your sanity.

19:50 – Between Lucy's 1st and 3rd child, she wrote 4 books, but then again, she doesn't clean her house often or iron. It's all about your personal priorities. What are yours?

23:30 – When reading about productivity tips, it seems like there's more of a male bias to it and it can be hard for many women to relate to.

27:30 – How can the men support the creative woman or the mother? Lucy explains in this segment.

31:20 – A woman's mood and creative energy levels vary depending on her cycle. It's important for men to be aware of that energy and what stage of her cycle she is in.

34:50 – Lucy talks about her book Moon Time, which helps women chart their cycle and their creative energies.

39:10 – Lucy has just taken on a PA and, as a natural lone wolf, she is learning how to delegate her work.

42:40 – In this segment Lucy talks about her most unanticipated challenge so far.

45:10 – Final takeaway? “Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” Don't put it off until next year, start now.

Mentioned In This Episode:

LucentWord.com

DreamingAloud.net

http://thehappywomb.com/

http://www.womancraftpublishing.com/

http://www.amazon.com/Lucy-H-Pearce/e/B00DDTD15G

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Johnny B. Truant is the co-founder of a publishing company called Sterling and Stone. He has written many fiction books like Unicorn Western, The Beam, Fat Vampire, and more. Johnny and Charlie go way back and have known each other for quite some time. On today's show, Johnny talks about his dreams in wanting to become a fiction writer, self-publishing, and gives great insight on how to make partnerships work.

Key Takeaways:

1:40: - Charlie introduces Johnny.

4:30 – Johnny writes four hours a day and can produce between 6,000 to 8,000 words.

7:30 – Johnny talks a little bit about how he started writing.

11:15 – It took 12 years for Johnny to write his first novel and then he gave up on trying to write fiction.

16:00 – Don't be afraid to call yourself an expert!

20:45 – New technology made it easier for everyone to do their own self-publishing.

25:15 – People think that because they're doing creative work, they can not develop a reliable plan or path, but Charlie says this is not true.

28:00 – Try not to compare yourself to Johnny. Work at your own pace and always try to do a little bit more than you did yesterday.

31:00 – How does Johnny make it work with two other partners? He explains in this segment.

39:20 – You need to respect the other partner involved, communicate, and treat your business relationship almost like a marriage.

43:10 – If you are able to manage your expectations well, you won't end up being disappointed and you can move the business forward with your partners.

46:00 – What's the one key takeaway? There's no substitute for hard work.

Mentioned In This Episode:

http://www.amazon.com/Johnny-B.-Truant/e/B007984T5S

http://sterlingandstone.net

http://selfpublishingpodcast.com/

http://750words.com/

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Todd Sattersten loves business books. He helps experts publish books and is the founder of BizBookLab. He is also the co-author of The 100 Best Business Books of All Time. He talks with Charlie today on the show about how he got started, why he decided to help others in the publishing industry, and more.

Key Takeaways:

1:30 – Todd talks about how he got started in the book industry.

5:45 – Due to the economic down turn and the shift in the book industry, Todd decided to take more of an entrepreneurial path instead.

11:40 – Todd talks about paper versus digital formats and how it changed the industry.

20:40 – Traditional publishing or self-publishing? There are benefits to both.

28:35 – There's a fine between writing something you and a very small audience would appreciate and writing something the masses would love.

32:45 – You have to have a clear focus on who your reader will be before you write your book.

37:30 – Field test your book with a few of your critics before your book hits the market.

40:50 – You always have to be promoting your book. Todd created custom book covers for his book to give away on special occasions.

47:30 – Publishing can be a really good thing to add to your business model.

50:15 – The one takeaway? Todd says, “Find the place you can easily see the gratitude that you have for it.”

Mentioned In This Episode:

http://toddsattersten.com/

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Terry "Starbucker" St. Marie is a writer, consultant, start up investor, and more. He has recently started an online magazine called BuiltOregon.com, which was crowd funded in December 2014. Terry has had his own business since 2010 and was named top 100 Leadership and Management Experts by Inc. Magazine. He sits down with Charlie to share his story, why he does what he does, how he builds strong communities, and more.

Key Takeaways:

1:30 – Charlie introduces his guest, Terry.

6:00 – Why did Terry leave his 'stable' job for a three-person team?

14:10 – Terry shares tips on how you can work on building better communities.

19:10 – In Charlie's experience people are shy in connecting other people to a higher purpose. Why is that? Terry shares some insight into this.

26:30 – Serve our customers and support each other is the business principle Terry lives by with his employees.

29:10 – One of the things that make us unhappy are setbacks and feeling stalled in our lives.

34:15 – Unanticipated Challenge? Terry doesn't know what to do with his book.

39:10 – Life can be good and hard at the same time.

42:00 – Don't forget to always push forward.

Mentioned In This Episode:

BuiltOregon.com

http://www.terrystarbucker.com

https://twitter.com/starbucker

Three Signs of a Miserable Job – Patrick Lencioni

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Glenda Watson Hyatt is a blogger, motivational speaker, and more. She has cerebral palsy, which limits some of her function. On the show you may hear the use of additional technology to help her communicate her message to the Productive Flourishing audience. She delivers an inspiring message on the show today and Charlie talks a bit about her life, motivational speaking, and living her life's purpose.

Key Takeaways:

3:11 – Despite Glenda's disabilities, she has lived a very enriched life and won't let it stop her.

5:01 – What are some of Glenda's challenges in being a motivational speaker?

6:30 – Glenda wrote her book to help share her story.

8:40 – Glenda wants people to see her as intelligent and capable.

10:10 – At some point in our lives, we are going to have some sort of disability.

14:15 – Glenda has gone kayaking, horse back riding, and zip lining.

18:20 – How does Glenda over come her fear?

20:00 – Charlie is glad they had this interview unscripted.

23:10 – Glenda leaves the listeners with some final thoughts.

Mentioned In This Episode:

I'll Do It Myself by Glenda Watson Hyatt.

http://www.doitmyselfblog.com/

Twitter @GlendaWH

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Todd Kashdan is a public speaker, psychologist, professor, and author. He has published over 150 peer reviewed journal articles about the meaning of life, strength and development, stress, and more. He is the author of Curious? and, his most recent book, The Upside of Your Dark Side; which he talks a little bit about on Productive Flourishing. Todd shares his wide range of insights with Charlie in this episode as well as talks about some of the challenges he faces, creating stronger bonds, and more.

Key Takeaways:

2:45 – Todd explains how he has two core values and how challenging it is to manage both of them.

7:24 – If you're doing things that aren't pleasurable, but are meaningful, then it's important to have discipline.

11:00 – Everybody has their own set of tools, but it takes time for people to figure out what those tools are and how to use them.

16:20 – Don't always be nice. It sometimes pays to call people out and be a little more narcissistic.

21:50 – Experiencing challenges or discomfort with others creates strong bonds. If you are always nice with certain people, then those bonds aren't tested and you may seek comfort else where.

27:15 – Remember, experiencing anxiety, guilt, and embarrassment, although uncomfortable, these emotions have a purpose. They serve to remind you to be considerate of others.

35:30 – If you are impulsive and say what's on your mind without being a jerk about it, people tend to view you as more open, more kind, and will want to be in relationship with you.

43:50 – We become what we're doing, so what are you doing?

47:30 – Charlie loves Todd's latest book, The Upside of Your Dark Side.

48:20 – Todd talks about what's next for him in this segment.

Mentioned In This Episode:

http://toddkashdan.com/

Body of Work by Pam Slim

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Laura Coe is an entrepreneur, coach, and writer. She teaches her clients special spiritual techniques to help them live better emotionally stable lives. Laura co-founded Litholink Corporation, a healthcare company that helped over 350,000 patients a month nationally. When she sold Litholink to a Fortune 500 company, she decided it was time to pursue her lifelong passions and help others. She talks to Charlie today on Productive Flourishing about her new book entitled Emotional Obesity, emotional health, corporate America, and more!

Key Takeaways:

2:10 – Laura explains how she transitioned from being a co-founder to an author on emotional health issues.

5:40 – What is emotional obesity? Laura explains.

8:30 – How do we know if we're emotionally obese when there is no emotional scale?

11:50 – When Laura left corporate America she wanted to do something she loved, but she couldn't pursue it just yet because she had lost her inner voice.

17:10 – Laura talks about some of the challenges she had when writing her book.

22:40 – You don't need a PhD to help others or do good work.

26:50 – What kind of exercises can we do to tame the emotional obesity? Laura shares some insight.

30:00 – One of Laura's unanticipated challenges is starting her second business and becoming an entrepreneur again.

32:00 – The one takeaway you need to know? Laura says just start! Step forward even when you're not ready.

Mentioned In This Episode:

http://emotionalobesity.com/

Paradise Lost by John Milton

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Mark is a fourth-generation entrepreneur who has written 7 different programs and a number of classes for entrepreneurs. He runs a distribution business and is also a paramedic in the San Francisco Bay Area. He sits down with Charlie today to talk about doing what you love, making the money you want, and making a difference in the world.

Key Takeaways:

2:15 – Mark talks about how he started Heart of Business.

7:30 – You can make a profit as well as make a difference in the world.

12:30 – Let go of perfectionism.

18:30 – Most entrepreneurs love what they do, but many people have a hard time connecting with their customers even when they have a sales or marketing background.

24:20 – Mark talks about what excites him the most about his business.

32:00 – Ask yourself this question, do our current methods match our principles?

36:30 – One of Mark's unexpected challenges is expecting something to happen 'right now' with his team when it needs more time to grow.

38:00 – The one takeaway? Mark says be compassionate and gentle with yourself on your journey.

Mentioned In This Episode:

http://www.heartofbusiness.com/

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Jeffrey Davis is a creativity consultant who helps connect his clients to what really matters. He is a writer and the author of the book entitled The Journey from the Center to the Page. He also has had several essays, articles, and short stories appear in both print and on the web publications all over the world. He sits down with Charlie Gilkey to talk about ideas and how to honor the people who inspire you.

Key Takeaways:

2:15 – We're always swimming in new ideas and sometimes we accidentally take it from someone else.

7:10 – What is a signature idea?

15:07 – Danny Brown pointed out how an advertising agency stole an independent video's premise and ideas without any attribution.

20:10 – Both Jeffery and Charlie talk about the degrees of attribution.

26:55 – People don't want to reference their competitors, but when you do, you are operating from a point of generosity versus a hoarding mentality.

31:10 - Maria Popova actually created a standard on how to properly attribute content creators and she was called an elitist for it.

37:25 – Being generous with your ideas actually helps you with your book marketing.

41:15 – Jeffery read a great Forbes article about how to steal ideas ethnically. Charlie chimes in on this as well.

43:25 – We have signature ideas that can not be stolen.

Mentioned In This Episode:

Where Good Ideas Come From by Steven Johnson

Here Comes Everybody by Clay Shirky

Ecstasy of Influence by Jonathan Lethem

After the Ecstasy, the Laundry by Jack Kornfield

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Tara Sophia Mohr is an expert on well-being and women's leadership. She has a book entitled, Playing Big: Find Your Voice, Your Mission, Your Message and Tara has been featured on Maria Shiver, Huffington Post, and more. She talks to Charlie today about some of the problems women face in modern times, self-doubt, launching her book with a new born in tow, and resisting our true calling.

Key takeaways:

4:22 – It's hard to be seen as the likeable and good girl when you're trying to challenge the status quo.

9:55 – Play big. Identify what that means to you. Sometimes playing big doesn't have to be big at all.

14:16 – We tend to resist our true calling because of fear.

17:15 – Tara explains about two types of fear in this segment.

22:10 – Women want to be both competent and likeable, but sometimes the two collide with each other and women dumb down their competence to seem more likeable.

29:10 – Both Tara and her husband are in the same type of career field, but Tara thinks it is important to advance each of their careers individually and without using your partner as a crutch.

34:20 – Tara didn't anticipate the amount of opportunities that would open for her as a result of the book and it has been one of her challenges to manage.

37:15 – It's so hard to focus on one thing when we get 20 new ideas a day.

41:22 – The biggest takeaway? Self-doubt is a big problem for women. Tara says to work on taking action when you feel self-doubt.

Mentioned In This Episode:

http://www.taramohr.com

http://www.productiveflourishing.com/

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Jonathan Fields is an entrepreneur, husband, dad, and an award-winning author. Jonathan is currently focused on the Good Life Project, which is a global movement that helps educate, inspire, connect, and support mission-driven people to achieving more connected and engaged lives. He talks to Charlie today about acting on your thoughts and being the best you can be.

Mentioned In This Episode:

http://www.jonathanfields.com/

http://www.productiveflourishing.com/

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Susan Piver is a New York Times bestselling author of 7 books and a Buddhist teacher. She has been practicing Buddhism since 1995 and became authorized to teach Shambhala Buddhist meditation in 2005. Today on Productive Flourishing, Susan talks about The Open Heart Project, an online meditation community, and how she wanted to help people who did not live close to or have access to a meditation teacher.

Mentioned In This Episode:

http://susanpiver.com/

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Seth Godin is a best selling author and has written 17 books that have sold all over the world. Some of his more famous books include The Dip, Tribes, Purple Cow, and Linchpin. Along with his multiple book successes, he is also the founder of Squidoo.com, a website that allows users to sell products or share their own content. Charlie sits down with Seth live to talk about some vital moments in Seth's career and experiences that you can learn from.

Mentioned In This Episode:

http://www.sethgodin.com/sg

http://www.ted.com/talks/elizabeth_gilbert_on_genius?language=en

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Steve Errey had been diagnosed with CFS for 5 years before he decided to walk his very first 26 mile marathon. People who suffer from CFS often can not take care of themselves, get out of bed, and even the simplest of physical activity hurts. He created the RunforMe website to bring awareness to his condition and raise funds to help others understand his situation better as well as fund more research for this illness. Many doctors refuse to believe this illness exists and it has been Steve's mission to prove them wrong.

Mentioned In This Episode:

http://www.runfor.me/

https://twitter.com/SteveErrey

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Pamela is an award-winning author, a motivational speaker, and the creator of the blog Escape from Cubicle Nation. She has recently released a new book called Body of Work and talks a little bit about her book, her journey in creating it, and answers some great questions from your host Charlie Gilkey on Productive Flourishing.