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BIZCATALYST 360
Trauma is the lasting emotional response that often results from living through a distressing event.
The definition that I prefer comes from Dr. Porges who is a psychologist and neuroscientist. He is also the developer of Polyvagal Theory.
“Trauma is what happens to a person when there is either too much too soon, too much for too long or not enough for too long.”
I share both definitions because I think that when it comes to talking about trauma most conversations go towards the extremes such as military, first responders or tragic accidents.
Trauma is one of those conversations that can quickly go to the “well, I didn’t have it as bad as someone else so I don’t want to talk about it.”
This mindset even happens within the communities I mentioned above. Being a Marine Corps veteran myself I can talk about my own experiences whether it be personally or with talking with my brothers and sisters in arms.
There is an apprehension to discuss how your trauma affected you since there are others that “had it worse”.
The bigger challenge then becomes that when people are feeling the effects of trauma they may make the “story” worse since they feel that they have to show that their response is appropriate to the experience.
Studies have been done pertaining to PTSD that have shown that people who have gone through shared traumatic experiences and then have PTSD respond differently over time. One of the biggest markers was that those that make their story less impactful over time have quicker recovery times.
This means that as they recall the events that led to them having PTSD the “movie” inside their mind loses its power.
This is a key concept that I use when working with clients that are dealing with trauma and phobias. Phobias tend to be a one time learning from a traumatic event that gets stored in our minds as a rule on how to interact with life.
The other category of trauma that is most prevalent is relationship trauma. That can be from family and upbringing or later in life with romantic relationships.
When it comes to Dr. Porges’ definition you can see how all three areas could show up in this type of trauma.
1.Too much too soon- One time event.
2.Too much for too long – sustained issues.
3.Not enough for too long
The one I would like to discuss is having not enough for too long. This one is based on the teachings of polyvagal theory. I will say that this is also about our need for connection.
We are born with a need for connection. Not just physically, although there are many studies that show the benefits of touch to include that being hugged by someone you feel safe with releases oxytocin, sometimes referred to as the Love hormone.
Our nervous systems also connect with each other. In Polyvagal theory this is referred to as Neuroception. Our autonomic nervous system is always looking for signs of safety and signs of threat. As we go through life with a well regulated (meaning it understands and responds accordingly to those cues) nervous system it allows us to interact with the world as it is and not based on negative memories of the past that dictate an overly cautious response.
This is relevant here because of another part of polyvagal theory which is co-regulation. Meaning that our nervous system reaches out to the other nervous systems around us and “checks in” so to speak. When you grow up around others that have a regulated nervous system then you can connect with them at that level.
Have you ever walked into a room and you could feel the tension (as the saying goes). Maybe there isn’t anything actually happening that is a threat but someones (or multiple people in the room) nervous system is in sympathetic mode (i.e fight or flight) and your nervous system is picking up on it.
That is an example of a non-regulated nervous system. The example of them feeling a threat where one isn’t.
If you grew up around someone that had the issue of not feeling safe and not having a regulated nervous system then your nervous system wasn’t able to co-regulate and figure out what is actually safe and not safe.
There is also the situation where there may not have been love in the household or at least love that you could feel and understand. These are all aspects of the trauma that would be looked at.
However the trauma showed up in a person’s life there are ways to support them in dealing with it and processing it so they can live a happier and healthier life.
This is a very deep subject with a lot of nuance around it.
In my professional life I see clients working through trauma, to include those with PTSD. There are many ways to approach healing trauma and each person is an individual. Based on their experiences and how they are processing the trauma we find the beginning of the journey to their healing.
Dr. Evelyn Green adjusted her virtual reality headset, the familiar weight a comfort. Outside, the bustling cityscape of Mars shimmered, a red frontier that was now her home. Yet, the path to becoming the colony’s lead botanist hadn’t been straightforward. It was a journey fuelled by rebellion, resilience, and ultimately, a revelation in the heart of a forgotten greenhouse.
Evelyn was a prodigy, her childhood a whirlwind of science fairs and awards. However, her rebellious nature clashed with the rigid expectations of academia. A disastrous lab accident deemed a reckless disregard for protocol, resulted in her expulsion from her PhD program. Dejected and ostracized, she retreated to her late grandmother’s abandoned greenhouse, a place filled with dusty plants and forgotten dreams.
There, amidst the overgrown foliage, Evelyn stumbled upon a hidden diary. It belonged to her grandmother, a botanist who’d dreamt of terraforming Mars. The diary detailed her experiments, her failures, and a glimmer of hope – a genetically modified strain of lichen that thrived in harsh environments. It was a forgotten key, a potential gateway to her grandmother’s unfulfilled dream.
Evelyn poured her heart into reviving the lichen, fuelled by a desire to honour her grandmother’s legacy. The greenhouse transformed into her laboratory, the silence punctuated by the hum of growth lamps and the excited chatter of podcasts about Martian colonization. The lichen thrived, its hardy green tendrils proof of a potential solution for terraforming.
One day, a research team from the Mars One program stumbled upon Evelyn’s online blog detailing her work with the lichen. Impressed by her findings and tenacity, they offered her a position – not as a lab assistant, as she expected, but as the lead botanist for the Mars colony.
Standing on the red sands of Mars, Evelyn felt a pang of bittersweetness. The journey hadn’t been easy, the rejection and doubt a constant undercurrent. Yet, the forgotten greenhouse, a symbol of rebellion, had become the very foundation of her success. It was a reminder that sometimes, the most important discoveries are made not in prestigious labs, but in quiet corners, fuelled by passion and a touch of defiance.
Unconventional may not always be wrong. When the world does not accept you as yourself, it’s at that time you need extra confidence in yourself and your abilities. What appears finished may be the start of something extraordinary. It’s all about acting on your beliefs and vision, and the people who once did not believe in you will suddenly start taking you seriously.
Remember, we can’t change the world and other people’s choices, but we can certainly make decisions based on our beliefs and for ourselves.
You don’t need to be defined or confined by other people’s opinions of you. You are a free bird, embrace your divine liberty. Though life on Mars is yet a dream, as its rightly said, the beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder.
Are you ready for a rhetorical question? It’s one that you likely already know the answer to but may not have ever thought of in a positive light.
THE QUESTION: What is as old as time itself? Its presence can motivate you, most often out of desperation rather than inspiration. It can cause you to shift your gaze and shirk back into a darkened corner to hide rather than look into Its steely eyes. It moves many people to think, say, and do regretful things. It’s also difficult to identify because It wears so many deceiving disguises.
THE ANSWER: As you may have already concluded, “It” is Fear and most of us try to avoid it like the plague.
When was the last time Fear knocked at your door? Sometimes it’s difficult to recognize because It wears so my different disguises. Between a polarized political climate, an uncertain economy, violence in our own homes and streets, and wars raging worldwide, there has never been a time when Fear has been more prevalent on our planet. Not coincidentally, I made Fear the topic of my seventh book while watching the 6:00 PM News one evening. After some deep contemplation, I decided the title would be “When Fear Speaks, Listen… The 7 Messengers of Fear.” The reason for that provocative title is that most of us are so busy running from, or denying, Fear we seldom take time to stop, turn and face it—and ask why it’s appearing in that moment. The purpose of the book is to introduce an awareness that we don’t have to perceive Fear as our enemy, allowing it to manipulate our emotions and shape our lives. As odd as it sounds, with mindfulness and a new perspective, we can actually perceive Fear in a new light. I know whence I speak because for the first forty-years of my life, Fear was my greatest nemesis and, as such, I gave it far more power than it deserved. It controlled me and how I reacted (rather than responded) to nearly any crisis. Can you relate?
As I matured spiritually and emotionally, I learned to perceive my various fears as Messengers bearing vital information for my future well-being. When I learned to face, lean in, and dance with my various Fears they became my greatest teachers. With the correct perspective, we can learn to see Fear as an ally appearing in our lives at the exact right time with the gift of information we need—not to just survive but thrive. The only caveat is, rather than running from it or trying to anesthetize it, we must turn toward Fear, embrace it and ask what message it has for us. If we will listen, we’ll gain the wisdom necessary to transcend it and then we can send it on its way.
All Fear is attached to a concern of death—or loss—of some sort; and it affects every area of our lives. It might be the death or loss of our own lives, a relationship, a career, a reputation, a bank account, a lifestyle, or our ability to control someone or something. Understanding our Messengers of Fear will help us manage the concern of loss in a proactive rather that a reactive manner. While the faces of Fear are legion, in my book, the seven most prevalent disguises that Fear hides behind are: Anger, Worry, Judgement, Selfishness, Shame, Loneliness, and Uncertainty. Each of these Messengers of Fear brings along a host of other descendants as well. Once we elevate our perspective and refocus our perception of Fear, we’ll be able to see it for what it really is… and isn’t.
We can run but we can’t hide—nor should we try! We need the information we receive from Fear in order to thrive, let alone survive.
Simply put, all God’s children are subject to a visit from Fear. When equipped with the right information from the 7 Messengers of Fear, we can transcend what frightens us and can get on with that which is ours to do to. A life rich with purpose, joy, freedom, and peace lies just on the other side of our greatest Fears. Are you ready for the adventure? Just listen to your Fear and you’ll know where to begin!
NOTE: If you are interested, When Fear Speaks…Listen will be available on May 14th on Amazon and at other major retailers.
Podcast host Tony Michaelides sharing some memories of the early days spent with U2 and the very first time he saw them in 1980 together with getting them their first national radio and TV performances outside of their native Ireland.
“Creation, Expansion Beyond Belief, and Receiving ALL the Happy that Comes My Way…HAPPINESS—Yess, More Please!!!”
The above words began coming through to me in bits and pieces towards the latter part of 2023. Unsure why, but feeling strong urges to write them down as they floated about my head, I created a section in my notes app and titled it ‘Musings for 2024’. Flash forward to today and I am beyond grateful that I did—as they comprise my mantra for the year, my invitation to party with the Universe.
Exploding with excitement is how I can best describe my life in 2024 thus far. And we are just getting started, my friends! Several fabulous, creative opportunities have presented themselves seamlessly and sequentially since the beginning of January. From the publication of my third multi-author book to my presentation in the May installment of 360° Nation’s InsteadTALKS, my heart and mind keep circling back to my celebratory invite from the Universe. What delightful gifts have I been able to receive from such a generous and gracious host!
Along with my amazing adventures in the creative sphere, I’ve been recently miraculously blessed in the physical realm. True expansion and growth beyond belief have been witnessed in my body in such a short time frame. I’ll briefly share some highlights from the past twenty-seven years of chronic health issues to provide background context.
All hell broke loose in 1997 when three infectious diseases decided to wreak havoc upon my immune system. Their presence evolved into a severe case of Fibromyalgia, which would rear its ugly head in flare ups of extreme fatigue and joint pains. Flares would come and go and could last anywhere from a few weeks to several months.
One day in 2009, I experienced a flare that never subsided. The extreme levels of fatigue and joint pains amped up quite a few notches as I lost my ability to walk and many of my mental faculties. I’d been starting to manage my symptoms well enough with meds, aqua physical therapy, and mental/emotional therapy with a social worker, until 2013–when I was diagnosed with a severe nervous system disorder called CRPS (Complex Regional Pain Syndrome).
Symptoms of CRPS include, but are not limited to, the following: (1) Continuous burning or throbbing pain, usually in the arm, leg, hand, or foot, (2) Sensitivity to touch or cold, (3) Swelling of the painful area, (4) Changes in skin temperature—altering between sweaty and cold, (5) Changes in skin color, ranging from white and blotchy to red or blue, (6) Changes in skin texture, which may become tender, thin, or shiny in the affected area, (7) Changes in hair and nail growth, (8) joint stiffness, swelling, and damage, (9) Muscle spasms, tremors, and weakness (atrophy), and (10) Decreased ability to move the affected body part.
In my case, the whole body was affected and was experiencing all the symptoms above and more. It was curving over itself and hardening into the fetal position. Nerves were so tightly wound up that the muscles and joints were stiffened to the point that there was no voluntary control over movement. The nerves were so sensitive that the body couldn’t tolerate physical touch of any kind. I spent an entire year (2013-2014) in bed with this condition and had some bone damage done to the feet. It was thought I would never move or walk independently again.
A fabulous five-day outpatient treatment of ketamine infusions proved the difference! Movement in my toes was possible the first night and I was completely pain free after the treatment was over—ready to start building up body strength and endurance. I’ve had several CRPS flare ups since 2014 and the ketamine infusions have resolved each one.
Since my last rounds of ketamine in 2021, I have continuously been building back my body strength, endurance, mental, and spiritual health—striving to be the healthiest version of me that I possibly can. And until a particular party with the Universe, which I attended in mid-March, this version of me could exist (from day to day) in a variety of phases. At my very worst, my mobility depended solely on the wheelchair. At my very best, I shuffle-walked around the house without the aid of assistive devices, used a rolling walker for short outings, and relied on the wheelchair for long ones.
So now that you know where I was, you’ll soon be able to see how drastically my physical life has changed upon accepting the Universe’s invitation in mid-March to party in Sedona, Arizona on my first retreat!
I must confess that the Sedona Retreat was just one of many firsts included in that mid-March party thrown by the Universe—which provided for so much growth, expansion, and receipt of HAPPINESS. For starters, it was the first time I had flown in an airplane since 2018 and the first time I was not being accompanied by my parents. My dear friend and retreat host agreed to be my travel buddy to and from the festivities.
And boy was the entire flight experience a gift—a complete contrast to my previous plane rides. Never in my life, even before I became ill, had an airport been a place where I found joy. The crowds, the stress, and the waiting or rushing about had never been what I considered pleasant. And this feeling only evolved to one of dread, once my illness began. Typically, I would have to take an anti-anxiety medication before I even left the house and then arm myself with earplugs and noise-canceling headphones because of intense sensory overload. Then my parents would push the wheelchair through the airport, as I kept my head down and my eyes to the floor. TSA (Transportation Security Administration) would scan my bags, body, and wheelchair and I’d be asleep before we even boarded the plane.
But NOT this time!!!
Upon arrival at the airport, my friend enquired how best to assist me through the whole process. I honestly wasn’t sure because I hadn’t flown in so long. After making the decision to use my wheelchair as a walker and push my carry-on bags as far and as long as I was able, I asked my friend to roll my big bag to the check-in counter. Then I stated, “Let’s see what happens.”
What happened next was a fabulous encounter with the most delightful man at bag-check. He did his job with a smile and joked with us while answering any questions we had. When finished, he even offered some advice about how to maneuver around the airport and TSA pre-check with the wheelchair. My friend and I made our way to the pre-check area and after the formalities, it was time for a break. So I sat in the wheelchair, enjoyed pleasant conversation with my friend until our plane arrived, and then settled into a nice nap once the plane took off.
“Let’s see what happens” should be added to my 2024 mantra. It truly defined the essence of the entire Sedona Retreat trip. It also solidified my acceptance to party with the Universe and opened my heart, mind, body, spirit, and eyes to the endless bounty of gifts that it provides.
Upon arrival in Sedona, I voiced those words, “Let’s see what happens” in response to my friend as we began a hike up a hill near her home. She and another friend provided not only the utmost emotional support, but also gave me the physical support I required to make it up that hill. After numerous breaks, between me shuffling my feet up the mound and leaning on each friend for balance and stability, I finally reached the summit.
Another fabulous first and gift presented by my dearest companion, the Universe!!!
Around the second or third day of the retreat, things started to get very interesting. It was as if the Universe had raised the volume level of the music at the party and wanted me to start dancing—or at least walking. One of the fabulous females attending the retreat happened to be a healer and massage therapist. “Out of the blue” she approached me—with a glimmer in her eyes—and asked if she could “work on” my right foot. Apparently it had been calling out to her. So I said, “Sure. Let’s see what happens.”
A few gentle snap-crackle-pops later, I noticed a warm, energized, and flowing sensation in my foot. It was as if something that had been “stuck” there was finally gone. Immediately after she was done massaging my foot and I got up from the couch, I realized I could stand flat on both feet. It had been at least ten years since I was able to perform this task due to the bone loss and deformity in my right foot.
Let’s hear it for another fantastic first and full-on miracle!!!
Well, the Universe didn’t stop there. While preparing for our hike the next day, I discovered I could lift my right foot while moving forward. This allowed for me to take actual steps independently, without having to shuffle my feet.
Another feat that was at least ten years in the making!!!
I’m not going to lie, it was awkward and my balance was really off. It was as if I was navigating a new pair of legs. But I was F*cking walking unassisted!
To put into perspective the gravity of this experience, I will flash forward several days—after the retreat was over. My friends and I returned to the hill that we climbed upon my initial arrival into Sedona. This experience was like night and day. No breaks were required to regain my energy or strength and I climbed the hill completely on my own! My heart was overflowing with gratitude, excitement, and celebration for the gracious gifts being presented by the Universe.
And the presents kept coming. The weekend following the retreat offered another first for me to experience—The Hay House I Can Do It Conference. This was a grand experiment, indeed, for it had been at least fifteen years since I had attended an in-person event—surrounded by all those people in one space for any length of time. But again, “Let’s see what happens” played over and over in my head and in my heart.
And what happened was spectacular!!!
Using the wheelchair as a walker, I was able to navigate the Phoenix Convention Center—at my own pace—as I watched several beloved inspirational keynote speakers and attended numerous break-out-sessions of joy, love, and positivity over the course of the three-day event. When I was tired, I napped—which really only happened on Saturday because we started the day so early. And just like the airport, the entire experience was most delightful and completely contrasted my encounters with crowds and intense environments over the course of my chronic health journey.
In the past, after several hours of activity in a day, I’d come home in severe pain and utter exhaustion, having to rest the entire next day…Not this time! Previously, I would have needed to arm myself with both earplugs and noise-canceling headphones to drown out the crowd…Nope, not necessary! Back in the day, I would have avoided this in-person event AT ALL COSTS for fear of how it might negatively trigger my health conditions. However…these three days at the Hay House I Can Do It Conference were an absolute blast!
All of these amazing adventures that took place in Sedona, mid-March, happened because of several key factors. I freed myself from expectations, became curious about the opportunities that arose before me, opened myself to embrace the experiences that I encountered, and allowed myself to receive all the HAPPINESS and goodness that was available to me. Upon this realization, it occurred to me that the fabulous party thrown by the Universe in Sedona, Arizona did not have to end. For every moment everywhere was an invitation to come party with the Universe—I just had to accept!
Since the download of my 2024 mantra and grasping its great significance—through experiencing such spectacular synchronistic events, gifts, and miracles both creatively and physically—I have decided to embrace each moment for what it truly is…the Universe offering me a chance to attend the most amazing party with the most stunning array of gifts imaginable! And the best part is, this proposition isn’t exclusively mine—We ALL are Welcomed to the Party!!!
Have You Accepted Your Invite???
If you’re like many people, then your knowledge is limited to the nightly news. While I enjoy watching NBC’s Nightly News I’ve come to understand it’s limits.
First, NBC is owned by Comcast, ABC is owned by Disney and CBS is owned by Paramount Global. The stockholders of these firms bought stock because they expect to profit from their investment. As a result, stories are created to attract and maintain your interest so you’re still watching when the commercials come on.
Second, Fear is a large part of many news stories. Author and entrepreneur, James Altucher, in his book, I Was Blind But Now I See, suggests that, the best thing you can do is avoid all news. Altucher has worked for over a dozen media companies, written for newspapers, TV shows and been a pundit on TV shows.
He told how he was backstage at a news show when the producer told him:
Don’t fool yourself – all of this is just filler in between advertisements.
Altucher shared this story,
Every week, a newsroom gets all of their best reporters and editors together on a Monday morning. Then the top guy says,“Ok, what have you got?” And the reporters have to respond with items that are designed to induce more and more terror. When the top guy thinks the terror is sufficient to beat out the competition, he says, “Ok, let’s go with it.”(I)
It’s easy to see what Altucher is talking about when you read headlines like these:
How many jobs will AI replace by 2030?
Will your kids join the thousands who die from fentanyl every year?
Is your daughter joining ISIS?
Third, time is another issue. Since news shows are limited in the time they can devote to any story, we’re frequently given sound bites that grab our attention but do little to explain what really happened. The Great Recession generated a lot of headlines, but it wasn’t until I read former Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner’s book, Stress Test, that I fully understood what happened.
Personal Note: Da Vinci said, “The noblest pleasure is the joy of understanding,” and I’m right there with him. I’m what you’d call a Current Events / History Nerd. I’ve always sought the full story. I’ve always sought to understand complex issues.
(I) Altucher, James. I Was Blind But Now I See. New York: CreateSpace. 2011. p. 35
Have you heard of MEDIUM’S ManyStories (MS), and are you using it to Bundle your assets? It is as easy as ABC I23. Social media savvy means having multiple promotional platforms that work harmoniously for you. We know the obvious ones like FaceBook, X, LinkedIn, and Instagram; the list goes on as it renews, changes, and expands. But what about your other platforms, like your blog site, online magazine columns, books you have authored, and video/audio podcasts to which you were a guest or are a host? Bundle them together for greater reach and clout.
Like the insurance company on TV that promotes Bundling, use MS to Bundle your assets and resources. It requires less work, exemplifies the saying, “United We Stand,” and works because a bundle of sticks is stronger than a single stick.
As an agented award-winning author with books translated into foreign languages, a columnist in the two magazines Living Your Dream in BIZCATALYST360° Online Magazine and the Coachella Valley’s terrestrial magazine Desert Health News, a blogger for online Patheos’ Above and Beyond the 5 Senses, and a Video Podcaster on Dreaming Healing for DreamVisions7Radio Network, I use this technique each time my Video Podcast, articles, or blogs are released. My Vartices (video articles) in BIZCAT3600 with an attached video get more reads, social media attention, and shares, making Varticles a perfect promotional vehicle for MS. It’s not as complicated as it may sound.
Please allow me to walk you through the simple step-by-step Bundling process.
Imagine it is 9 pm EST on a Tuesday. Dinner is done, the children are in bed, and it’s time for my Dreaming Healing Show on Dreamvisions7 Radio Network out of Rhode Island. At the end of the show, during which commercials for my five books and Dreamy Writers Conference Cruise on Holland America are advertised, I jot down the guest’s insights and add them to the Press Kit information sent by their publishing house to write my 1500-word Living Your Dream Varticle (video article) and 500-word Dream article for Desert Health News, distributed in California’s Coachella Valley stores, and home to Coachella & Stagecoach.
Both writings about Dreams have different titles, content, and stories presented in the podcast. One is a read-and-watch Varticle; the other is a read-only article.
They are sent to the different magazine editors. Once published, the MS Bundling fun begins.
The links to the published article and Varticle are:
- emailed to me by the editors, which I copy and paste onto MS where it says SHARE YOUR STORY in the top right-hand corner of my page. Take a look. https://www.manystories.com/@KathleenOkeefeKanavos
- then, I immediately use the social media links provided by MS to share and promote it
- and tag @MS, @MEDIUM, my magazine editors @BIZCAT @DesertHealthNews, my Video Podcast Network @Dreamvisions7RadioNetwork, podcast guests, guest’s publishers & agents, my publisher, distributor and agent, @InnerTraditions @Simon&Schuster, my…. Well, you get the picture. The published posts are displayed and promoted again by MS, who shares them with their readers and sends me the updated stats. Everyone is happy and impressed. EASY BREEZY!
Everyone and anyone affiliated with the article and varticle or my message about dreams is tagged so the MS link is shared and promoted on their professional pages with many followers.
You may say, “I can’t do that because I don’t have a column or a podcast, or….” You have MS.
If you are a writer or blogger reading this article but don’t use MS…Why NOT?! Here’s your chance. If you post articles or blogs on your website, the LinkedIn Blog page, or the many group blog spots, here are three easy ways to use MS to get the attention of your dream agent, publisher, column, podcast, followers, etc. Bundle! Start Small. Build Big. But Bundle!
Create a blog on your website like mine: https://www.kathleenokeefekanavos.com/nightmares-are-your-gifts-in-disguise/ Then, post your blog link on MS https://www.manystories.com/@KathleenOkeefeKanavos and promote it again on your social media pages at the same time MS shares it with their readers, which shows another platform (MS) promoting your work. Again, the steps are as follows: 1.) your website blog, 2.) Posted in MS Link 3.) Shared. This is Bundling. It will get attention.
Don’t toot your horn. Let MS toot it for you using your article/blog. Again, as easy as 123.
- After you share your link, tag the magazines, people, and companies (like agents and publishers) whose attention you wish to attract or sites on which you want to be a participant, columnist, blogger, or show host
- It will introduce you by showing (actions speak louder than words) that you are worthy of being published and promoted by other platforms and have a means of promotion (Bundling) that goes beyond just YOUR social media, can help promote them,
- and help you stand out as being a head above the crowd in the sea of social media noise
Bundling your assets on MEDIUM’s MS (ManyStories) is as easy as ABC, 123. Get your articles featured, stand out to potential professional advances, and loop-promote your writing with no end in sight. Build it. Bundle it… and they will come.
How do our beliefs show up in our relationships? One way to know is how you feel about yourself in that relationship–not how you feel about the other person, how you feel about YOU.
Do you often end up feeling the same way in relationships, even if the names and faces change? Do you feel like you are walking on eggshells, or are afraid your loved one might leave you? Are you tired of feeling criticized, like you have to do it all yourself, or of being afraid to ask for what you want? Perhaps you feel unimportant or that your needs don’t matter. Even though the faces may change, the feelings remain the same, since they are generated by us in response to the person we are in a relationship with.
The bad news is–it’s not about them. Really. Trying to change them won’t make us feel better.
The good news is–it’s not about them! This means we can stop our ongoing effort of trying to change THEM and bring our attention back to ourselves, where real change happens.
Most of us project our expectations onto those we are in a relationship with. Those expectations are what we learned as children.
If we look inside, those feelings we have in our current relationships are ones we experienced as a child. Different circumstances, same feelings. It’s the beliefs we learned as children that we project into our adult relationships that trigger those feelings once again.
If I believe I’m not OK just the way I am, I will attract relationships and situations that confirm my belief. I will find myself being criticized, judged or humiliated, and no amount of trying to change THEM will work. Until I find a way to own my belief, and change it to one that works for me, I’ll keep having the same experience in relationships. Once I realize I’m OK just the way I am, THEY will start responding to me as if I am OK.
When we can see what is happening, we can stop taking things personally, knowing that we are all just projecting our own expectations onto others from the past, and those expectations often don’t have anything to do with the other person.
It really is about our relationship with ourselves. The beliefs I hold about myself will always show up in my relationships. It’s a great mirror.
What beliefs about yourself are you willing to challenge and change today?
Phillip T. Williams is an accomplished executive who’s made a career of aligning Human Resources with business goals to boost performance, profitability, growth, and employee engagement. He spent 23 years with Merrill Lynch and is now a Qualified Arbitrator with FINRA Dispute Resolution Services, listening to both sides of securities-related disputes, weighing the facts, and rendering final and binding decisions. He’s earned a Bachelor’s Degree in Human Resource Management from the University of Phoenix, a Master’s Degree in Human Resources Development from Villanova, and is working on a Doctorate in Philosophy and human Resource Management, from Northcentral University.
An unabashed man of faith, Phil describes himself as a designated survivor of a life-threatening skin disorder. He’s also one of the most soft-spoken and unassumingly wise people I know.
Let go of the way you would like things to go.
–Andee Scarantino
As your experience is happening, just be in it. That sounds easy enough, but why is it so difficult to do? Andee Scarantino returns to Zen Sammich and, of course, she doesn’t hold anything back. Her transparency is not only refreshing, but it actually demonstrates the point she is making: To be WHEN you are more than who you think you are supposed to be.
A raging battle; most likely the Battle of Waterloo in 1815, painted by Horace Vernet in 1819. Standing in front of this painting which I have done a number of times, the scene envelops the senses.
A contrast of kindness afforded a little dog in comparison to the raging battle behind.
Such realism may penetrate the naturally protected imagination from the drama and tragedy of human conflict.
Smell the smoke, hear the crack of muskets firing and canon a brittle-like booming and soldiers fighting for their lives.
Bayonets flashing, thrusting at those on the other side of the conflict.
A surreal calmness as foot soldiers in the foreground; a drummer and trumpeter tending to a little dog, with genuine care. Imagination creates a vision where the scene is surrounded by a protective screen, minimising sounds and sights of battle.
The look on the soldier’s faces, genuinely caring for this little dog in the middle of a battle.
This may seem overtly irresponsible. How many dogs would be part of a regiment? ‘Dog OF the regiment’. Perhaps a pathway to kindness and care in the heat of battle.
This painting really gathers the feelings of the the soldiers. Challenging to imagine such compassion.
Look at the painting and loosen imagination. A field of battle and an act of kindness.
Featured image acknowledgement: The Wallace Collection
Anya squinted at the faded photograph; its edges frayed from countless touches. Twenty Siberian winters had aged the picture more than her weathered face. It showed a young woman with bright eyes and a hopeful smile, contrasting with the woman sitting alone in her log cabin. The vast and unforgiving taiga had claimed her solitude, but not her spirit.
Anya wasn’t a hermit by choice. She was an artist, a cartographer of the unseen. Here, in the heart of the Siberian wilderness, she wasn’t just surviving; she was translating the whispers of the wind, the language of the rustling leaves, the symphony of animal calls into breathtaking maps. Her maps weren’t of physical landscapes; they were maps of emotions, of the very soul of the taiga.
One particularly harsh winter, a young boy, lost and delirious, stumbled upon Anya’s cabin. Fear turned to awe as he saw her maps – swirling nebulas of colour depicting the taiga’s fury, the serenity of a moonlit clearing, the playful dance of a fox hunt. This wasn’t just art; it was a portal into a world unseen by human eyes.
Anya nursed him back to health, and in the flickering firelight, they spoke. He, of the village nestled on the taiga’s edge, of the fear and respect they held for the unknown wilderness. Anya, of the stories woven into the very fabric of the forest, of its hidden beauty and raw power.
When spring arrived, the boy left, carrying not just his strength but a map unlike any he’d ever seen. Back in the village, he shared Anya’s creation. It wasn’t a map to navigate by, but a map to understand. It bridged the gap between fear and respect, igniting a curiosity about the taiga.
Anya continued her silent conversations with the wilderness, her solitude no longer a burden. She was the bridge, translating the language of the wild for those who dared to listen. Her maps, carried by the wind and shared in hushed whispers, became a legacy far greater than any physical one. Twenty years alone, yet Anya, the artist of the unseen, had woven herself into the very heart of the Siberian taiga.
Sometimes what is unconventional, is often more fulfilling and incredible. Though it requires courage to begin and stay consistent, the rewards are priceless.
It is all about the right perspective and the willingness to walk the untrodden path. The journey is different but is definitely not for the faint-hearted.
The “Tears of Hope” Anthem stands as a profound testament to the resilience of the human spirit, deeply rooted in the life and advocacy of Aimmee Kodachian. At just 12 years old, she endured the heart-wrenching loss of her older brother, Robert, during a bombing in the 1975 Lebanese Civil War—a tragic event that occurred in the sanctuary of their home and left her family shattered and homeless.
Aimmee is donating 100% of her net profits from her book “Tears of Hope: My Journey of Faith, Courage, and Survival” and its Anthem (above), “A 12-Year-Old Girl’s Message to Humanity,” to the innocent children and loving mothers affected by war. The ‘Tears of Hope Movement firmly believes that by elevating consciousness in the world, we can transform the horrors of war into the enduring embrace of love and peace.
The “Tears of Hope” Movement is more than just a name; it embodies Aimmee’s unwavering commitment to positive change. Her mission is to help God’s children recover from the agony of war, be the voice for those who have no voice, and offer hope and opportunities to those in desperate need.
Never dismiss how you feel; always tap into the power behind these feelings and thoughts. They are connected with the reality that crossed your path in the past and bear powerful solutions that will be revealed once you listen to them. These authentic insights prepare you for success by leading you to your next appropriate step.
No matter how prepared we are or how many times we double-check our strategies, unforeseen occurrences may influence our path to success. Unexpected twists and turns can hamper our progress and stop us dead in our tracks unless we have the confidence to move forward.
The confidence necessary to conquer any challenge and achieve your dreams grows from releasing the power of your thoughts. It begins and ends with being in the moment.
Constant adjustments are part of any successful journey. Each instance comprises the basic building blocks for your abundant life.
Success is about moving forward despite any challenges you may encounter. Actions move you forward to experience accomplishment. It begins by cultivating confidence in you no matter what outside influences exist.
The heart doesn’t keep an HR-approved memo on whom it is supposed to grieve for or for how long. Yet, traditional workplace policies on bereavement leave seem to send quite the opposite message—they come with a laundry list of who qualifies for emotional downtime and who doesn’t, almost as if loss could be parsed into standard categories. It’s high time for a radical rewrite. I am calling for organizations to relinquish the dated recipe of tying bereavement leave to the official-sounding ‘relationship status’ and instead advocate offering bereavement leave that accommodates all forms of loss.
A Paradigm Shift in PerceptionDismantling the relationship requirement isn’t a suggestion rooted in a rebellion; instead, it is a strategic leap toward a more inclusive culture and a reflection of the evolving human experience. To demand that employees prove the depth of their connection to someone who has passed before they are allowed to grieve on the company’s watch is, at its core, an invasive and outdated practice. Why should the anguish of losing a beloved pet warrant any less time for recuperation than losing a cousin?You Grieve, You Need LeaveThe tight grip on who qualifies for leave based on ‘relationship’ severely underestimates grief’s universality. Grief transcends the boundaries of familial ties; it can arrive unannounced, a sidekick to any form of loss, from a divorce decree to the funeral arrangements of a friend from the neighbourhood. By recognizing this, businesses have the power to not only support their employees through some of their darkest times but also to forge a company culture rooted in compassion and flexibility.
Addressing the Skeptics: Cultivating a Culture That TrustsSkeptics might fire back with fears that such a move could be ‘exploited’, leading to a culture of unwarranted absence. If so, your organization has a culture problem, not a bereavement problem. This could be a moment of reckoning to redefine expectations and redefine the covenant of trust between employer and employee.
Leaders Lead by ExampleOne of the most potent tools in this cultural shift is leadership endorsement. When leaders are transparent about their own experiences with grief and vocal about the policies in place to support it, they pave the way for company-wide acceptance. This is a journey that requires courage—from leaders to instigate it and from the culture to sustain it.
The Hidden Costs of InflexibilityThe rigidity of traditional bereavement policies can often lead to employees taking unsanctioned leaves or worse—showing up at work, emotionally scarred and potentially disruptive. The cost implications of such scenarios are rarely counted among the initial ledgers but they resonate in productivity loss, disengagement, and even tarnished reputations.
An inclusive bereavement leave policy demonstrates a company’s commitment to its most valuable asset—its people.
In return, businesses can expect a more engaged, loyal workforce with a higher level of psychological safety and, in turn, resilience through even the most tumultuous times.
The Roadmap to Implementation: A Stepwise ApproachRadically rethinking policies is one thing; turning them into a functioning reality is quite another. The key is to approach this in calculated steps, with culture-building initiatives alongside practical policy adjustments.
Review, Revise, Revise AgainBegin by critically reviewing your current bereavement policies. Who do they serve, and who do they exclude? I am sure that they don’t account for those who have to travel to a funeral for example. Once the shortcomings are clear, work with stakeholders to craft a revised framework that is not only a good starting point but also compassionate and sustainable.
Communication is KeyManagers are often the front line of such policies and they will ebb and flow around them. The most important part is that everyone knows what is allowable. If the baseline is reasonable, then we have more room for equity and inclusivity. Bob doesn’t get upset that Anne received 2 weeks’ accommodation and he only got 4 days.Introduce Feedback LoopsLastly, every employee coming back into the workplace should have a return to work-process. That process should include feedback loops that welcome critiques and suggestions for your policy review cycle. Continuous learning and adjustments will be the hallmark of a policy that truly serves the needs of the workforce.
As the conversation around mental well-being continues to gain momentum, the inclusivity of bereavement policies becomes a flagship issue. This isn’t just another paragraph in the HR handbook; it’s a nuanced reflection of our humanity and the kind of workspaces we wish to manifest in the world.
If you would like to learn more or are interested in support in cultivating new bereavement policies or processes, please reach in.
Among the many magazines that come to our home for Anne, because she’s a designer and decorator, is one called, Architectural Products. A recent edition ran an article called, “The Smartest Building in Austin” (starting at page 28 in the print edition, page 30 in the digital edition). I don’t remember if Big Brother was identified as the architect of the building. But I do know he’s involved somehow.
I know that because the article said this, in part:
Sensors — approximately 6,000 of them — are attached to the spine. These connect to an automation system that allow[s] ownership and management to understand how people move within the structure and how the various spaces get utilized, such as conference rooms and parking. This data, along with the building’s integrated technology allows for optimization of the user’s experience and a highly personalized and responsive environment for comfort, health, and security … Smart Entry/Exit Stations with license plate recognition (LPR) cameras [are] … Designed to be completely touchless from the time a person pulls into the parking garage until arriving at the individual’s desk.
A few of the terms, phrases, and clauses in that paragraph had my Spidey Sense at DEFCON 1.
Shades of Orwell
Here are the terms that lit me up, along with my translational commentary:
- The spine. According to HPE Aruba Networking, “A spine-leaf architecture is data center network topology that consists of two switching layers — a spine and leaf. The leaf layer consists of access switches that aggregate traffic from servers and connect directly into the spine or network core. Spine switches interconnect all leaf switches in a full-mesh topology.” Guess who controls and has access to the full-mesh topology. Hint: It’s not the folks who work in the building.
- Allow[s] ownership and management to understand how people move within the structure. See #1.
- Optimization of the user’s experience. If you’re not sure who gets to define optimized, see #1 and #2.
- A highly personalized and responsive environment for comfort, health, and security. If you’re not sure whose comfort, health, and security are assured here, see #1, #2, and #3.
- Smart Entry/Exit Stations with license plate recognition (LPR) cameras. The cameras, of course feed into the spine. From there, see #1, #2, #3, and #4.
- From the time a person pulls into the parking garage until arriving at the individual’s desk. If you’re not sure to whom it’s important to monitor said person (who turns into an individual on the way to its desk), see #1, #2, #3, #4, and #5.
In addition to 1984, all that terminological obfuscation puts me in mind of this quote from Albert Camus:
The welfare of the people in particular has always been the alibi of tyrants, and it provides the further advantage of giving the servants of tyranny a good conscience.
George Orwell’s 1984, of course, is about a totalitarian regime, INGSOC (English Socialism), which exercises total control over every aspect of its citizens’ lives through physical and mental manipulation, surveillance, and propaganda. (It uses violence, too. I don’t know if the folks in the smartest building in Austin are prepared to go that far. Let’s hope not.)
Public domain, via Wikimedia CommonsIt makes you wonder what the limits of the smartest building in Austin’s control might be if the spine is run with AI. It’s shades of HAL in 2001. And if it gets that far, it’ll be easy enough to imagine a person getting through all the security checkpoints, turning into an individual arriving at its desk, hitting the power switch on a computer, and hearing this.
After all, if we’re controlling lives, controlling computers, and requiring bioscans, we’re flirting with totalitarianism, are we not? And let’s not forget, totalitarianism is dictatorial and utopian. More specifically, it’s able to become dictatorial precisely because it’s ostensibly utopian. It’s Fred Sanford’s statement, “Promise ‘em the elevator and give ‘em the shaft,” writ large. And while we’ve managed to get 24 years into the 21st century, let’s not forget the 20th century totalitarian state was the greatest intellectual justification for mass murder in history. Just sayin’.
From there, it’s not much of a stretch to imagine the smartest building in Austin and its architects creating a logo for their own regime, something that couches their desire to exercise total control over every aspect of the building’s occupants’ lives in some seemingly positive but nevertheless transparently euphemistic language. The logo and its tagline might be something like this:
Cut the Cards
Mr. Dooley (or Martin J. Dooley) was a fictional Irish immigrant bartender created by and appearing in many columns written by the American journalist and humorist, Finley Peter Dunne, in the late 19th and early 20th centuries. Mr. Dooley was famous for the expression, “Trust everybody, but cut the cards.” That’s invaluably sound advice, more pertinent today than it was when it was written, that should be universally applied. To put it another way, question everything. Always. Without fail.
And be absolutely sure of this: The bigger the organization, the institution, the bureaucracy, or the government that promises what it will do for you will be necessarily good for you, question it all the more. Hidden agendas and unintended consequences are certain to follow any such promises. How do we know that? It’s in the history we ignore so blithely and consistently. It’s why we are where we are.
If you don’t believe that’s true, there’s a building in Austin you’re gonna love.
It’s not that it’s easy
It’s that it matters
It’s both a skill and an art
that raises up all
that we do and say
beyond the ordinariness
of everyday chatter
It’s not so much about sharing
your good ideas or mine
It’s more about listening
to what those reflections
and stories evoke
within ourselves and each other
It’s not just about what we know
It’s paying attention to what
the world around us knows
and evokes in us
when we are quiet
and willing to be humbled
by the wisdom of trees
and all that lives
2025 could bring stagflation into the economy.Stagflation, a grim economic cocktail of stagnant growth and high inflation, can disrupt the financial fabric of any society, but the impact on women is often underexplored. From purse strings to job opportunities, we’ll dissect six ways stagflation can affect women and what it could mean for their financial and social standing.
Job Market Pressures: A Double Squeeze on Employment
In a stagflation scenario, job markets are notoriously tight. Typically, women face steeper odds of finding employment than men—these odds can double during an economic downturn.
With fewer job opportunities and higher competition, women’s unemployment rates can spike, exacerbating income disparities and reducing financial independence.
The job market pressures aren’t just statistical; they play out in myriad day-to-day challenges. For example, women might find it more difficult to secure part-time work market pressures aren’t just statistical; they play out in myriad day-to-day challenges. For example, women might find it more difficult to secure part-time work to fit around caregiving responsibilities or might be at higher risk of losing their jobs due to employer cutbacks on roles frequently held by women, such as retail or service industry positions.
Purchasing Power: The Struggle to Afford Basic Necessities
High inflation during stagflation means the cost of goods and services will rise significantly. This can especially impact low-income households, where women are often the primary earners.
With rising prices, women may struggle to afford necessities such as food, housing, and healthcare. This can make them vulnerable, making it difficult to choose between paying for essential items or meeting other financial obligations.
Moreover, the increase in prices of goods and services can also disproportionately affect women-owned businesses. As they face higher costs for supplies and materials, it becomes more challenging to remain competitive. This can lead to business closures, job losses, and declining economic opportunities for women.
Impact on Education and Career Advancement
Stagflation can also hurt education and career advancement for women. With limited job opportunities and lower wages, it becomes increasingly difficult for women to invest in their education and professional development.
Inflation can also make it more challenging for families to afford higher education for their children, limiting the opportunities available to women in future generations. This perpetuates the cycle of limited economic mobility for women.
Additionally, during stagflation, employers may be less likely to offer salary increases or promotions due to rising costs. This can further impede women’s career advancement and lead to a widening gender pay gap.
Stagflation can severely affect women’s financial stability and career opportunities. It is essential to address economic inequalities and implement policies that support women’s economic empowerment to mitigate the negative impacts of stagflation on women. So, policymakers must proactively tackle stagflation and its implications for women to build a more resilient and sustainable economy. Votes matter.
The night is quickly approaching.
It is a time when dreams come true and unwritten stories are waiting to be told. They swirl in colors and become as a mist spinning like a color wheel on an artist palette.
The birds go to their nest hoping that the eggs hatch in the morning and we may hear their song.
The night whispers stories hopeful that we hear them, believe in them and Strong Ink will decorate our paper with possibilities, mysteries, and storytelling.
We wait and pause holding on to them for one more moment…. Then we shall unleash them!!!!
What an odd experience
Seeing the familiar face of a stranger
Not a stranger at all
Because you knew me, parts of me.
You saw me younger, emotional,
Undressed, dressed down,
Birthing two babies,
Breastfeeding both our babies,
Nurturing our babies, toddlers,
Children, teens, young adults.
You saw me cooking dinners,
Nursing back to health our children,
Preparing lunches,
Cooking Breakfasts,
Walking dogs,
Scooping dog poo,
Cleaning, bitching,
Crying, weeping, raging,
Reading, apologizing,
Belly laughing,
Learning, healing,
Adapting, loathing,
Loving.
You saw me walk alone towards you,
On a path wearing black slacks,
Cream-colored tuxedo tails on an
August Sunday.
You saw me walk away from you,
and a judge’s bench on a
early day in June.
A friend once said,
You could not actually see me,
Because you could not even
See yourself in the mirror;
Face the truth of your lies,
of what you kept hidden from view
Did you see me today running by you?
Did you hear me say,
“Morning!” into the cold March wind
And your silence?
What an odd experience when a stranger
Becomes a friend, then nakedly an intimate partner,
Who remains emotionally remote,
Then physically absent for longer and longer
Chunks of time.
We had been so close,
And so very far away.
Intimate strangers.
Known, unknown.
Seen, unseen.
Wispy memories
Tainted by all the lies,
Which keep me blind from
Seeing you.
With joy and gratitude,
– Laura
Each day presents us with new challenges, opportunities for personal growth, and empowerment. However, the most daunting ones can trigger anxiety, especially when we feel we lack the natural talent or the necessary skills to overcome them. Negative comments from others, such as ‘It’s time to give up; you will never make it!’ can exacerbate this anxiety. But remember, these are just hurdles on your path to success, not showstoppers. Our blog offers insights on how to overcome anxiety for better outcomes.
Negativity hits each of us occasionally, and we wonder whether we will make a fool of ourselves or if there is a way past the situation to focus on what we most desire. Time and again, anxiety kicks in due to these matters, raising the question: Is it possible to overcome the stress for better outcomes, or do I need to face the blunt facts shared with me that it’s time to give up?
The Positive MindsetLive Life Without Regret.
We only have one life to live. Imagine how you might feel if you did not give an issue your all to correct it and move on. If you can’t fix a problem, ask a friend for help or hire help as necessary.
I sincerely appreciate that Executives Diary Magazine has published my story, https://lnkd.in/gsHG3bG5, and posted it on LinkedIn. My experiences are meant to inspire readers to reconsider their seemingly low points, assure them that they are not alone, and encourage the reconstruction of thinking to reach new heights.
Sometimes, walking alone is necessary to motivate our mind, body, and spirit to achieve new heights. Without a doubt, a positive mindset opens many more doors.
Embrace Your Long-Term Vision Always
Before you sleep at night, make it a habit to recall what you ultimately want to accomplish. Upon awakening, do the same, plus review the goals necessary to complete that day to move a baby step further toward your distant achievement.
Motivational Thoughts to Embrace:
- We only have one life to live; it’s our duty to live it our way.
- Realize that statistics are temporary.
- Tomorrow is a blank canvas; begin painting your future today.
Take A Time-Out for Yourself
Long ago, I was taught that a computer must be rebooted when it isn’t operating correctly, and it’s wise today to do the same for ourselves. Accordingly, when anxiety on any level hits, and depending upon the weather, make time to enjoy the outdoors with a run, hike, walk, or bike ride, allowing your mind to wander. In the wintertime, go to the gym to strengthen your muscles, body, and mind; even better, find time to do so all year!
All the while, allow free-flowing thought that suddenly appears to be your magic wand, bringing new ideas to mind. Give each one due consideration to begin with the recurring one while advancing to testing, revision, and testing again to ensure it works well and complements the other strategies already in place. Creative projects and embracing memorable songs can open our minds to previously missed ideas.
The lyric titles that speak to me are:
‘Listen to the Music,’ by the Doobie Brothers
‘The Answer is Blowing In the Wind,’ by Cat Stevens.
Focus On the Worst to Realize the Best
Most of us ‘have been there,’ from annoyances to seeming catastrophes. Reflecting on how far we have come is always good when we have troublesome days, particularly when the next disaster hits. Use it to give yourself a pep talk to move past the dilemma and return to what matters most.
In Conclusion: Overcome Anxiety for Better Outcomes
Finally, we only have one life to live. Acknowledging this fact leads to realizing that we must live without regret. When we commit to fixing small or significant issues, we can look back and realize how far we have come. Finally, embrace the community spirit by sharing the best of what you learn, feel the joy for all you have accomplished and shared in your lifetime, and live life to its fullest!
The Wallace Collection in Manchester Square, London is my favorite museum and art gallery. Many Dutch and French artists’ works create such an atmosphere where wondrous scenes and portraits, project a high degree of tangibility. From the Battle of Waterloo to Frans Hal’s ‘The Laughing Cavalier’
This particular masterpiece ‘Innocence’ is by French artist Jean-Babtiste Greuze. (1725-1805).
A young girl is embracing a lamb which is a symbol of innocence, gentleness, patience and humility.
As one of the most famous paintings in the world it also made an appearance in a Sherlock Holmes novel.
Should anyone be in London, a visit is certainly recommended!
With acknowledgement to The Wallace Collection.
Featured image credit Jean-Baptiste Greuze, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons
Recently, I celebrated a significant milestone—my 60th birthday! As I reflect on this moment, I’m overwhelmed with immense gratitude. How swiftly the years have flown by!
During the celebrations, I experienced an extraordinary sense of love and connection. It felt as though every cell in my body was infused with unconditional love. This profound feeling of gratitude brought immense joy and peace to my heart, reminding me of the beauty that life holds when we open ourselves to receive it.
I cherished every moment spent with my family—the laughter, the smiles, and the warm embraces. We enjoyed morning walks along the beach, heartfelt conversations under the shade of our umbrella, delightful swims in the Gulf of Mexico, a serene sunset cruise, and shell hunting in the crystal-blue waters. Each experience was a reminder of the breathtaking beauty of God’s creation and the love that surrounds us.
It dawned on me that this connection and joy are not limited to special occasions. They are always available to us if we choose to see and embrace them daily. Living with awareness is the key.
As we move forward, I invite you to join me in this practice of embracing immense gratitude. Close your eyes, recall a moment you cherish, and let that feeling fill you. This mindset of appreciation not only enhances our own lives but also helps us see more positivity in our world.
Take a moment to identify something in your life that you truly appreciate. Foster and nurture this immense gratitude and watch as it inspires you to open your heart to the abundance of love surrounding you.
Let’s continue to support each other in finding and acknowledging beauty every day. Thank you for being a part of my community. Here’s to more mindful moments together!
With love in my heart,
Nancy
The title of this post is a quote from Spanish philosopher Jose Ortega y Gasset. I am the happy owner of the book,
Metaphors Be With You: An A to Z Dictionary of History’s Greatest Metaphorical Quotations
This gift to myself, written by Dr. Mardy Grothe has enriched my life. That’s probably why I find myself constantly rereading it.
Dr. Grothe reminds us,
Metaphor isn’t just for poets; it’s in ordinary language and is the principal way we have of conceptualizing abstract concepts like life, death, and time.
Dr. Grothe shares the following definition of metaphor from the American Heritage Dictionary,
A figure of speech in which a word or phrase that ordinarily designates one thing is used to designate another, thus making an implicit comparison, as in “a sea of troubles” or “All the world’s a stage.”
Sometimes words can be spartan, meaningless collections of letters, if you ever read some really bad writing, you’ll know what I mean.
That’s why I love reading these metaphors, like this one from German writer Berthold Auerbach:
Music washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life.
One of my favorites is from Napoleon:
A leader is a dealer in hope.
French-American diarist and essayist, Anais Nin, speaks volumes in nine words about courage:
Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage.
Psychologist Terri Apter captures the essence of youth:
Adolescence is society’s permission slip for combining physical maturity with psychological irresponsibility
Benjamin Disraeli catches the positive side of misfortune:
There is no education like adversity
Robert Louis Stevenson communicates what it is like to age in a way that this 65 year old can clearly understand:
And what would it be to grow old? For, after a certain distance, every step we take in life we find the ice growing thinner below our feet, and all around us and behind us we see our contemporaries going through.
Given these last three metaphors were for subjects beginning with the letter “A”. Just imagine how enjoyable the next 25 letters will be.
If you wantTo find beautyIn the bleakThen you gotta Stop countingLost sheepAnd insteadLook at life asAn abundant Gift…Shift your focusSo your headCan give Your heart aLift…Many things Will pass atthe blink ofAn eyeBut need notOur JudgementTo figure outWHY!
All of it?Your beliefs? Your family? Your job? Your $20 Starbucks gift card that’s been sitting in your wallet since 2011?
What if it were all a big, illusory house of mirrors constructed to make you believe it’s real, so you could live out a story as the character of you?
This notion has been hinted at through the years by the great sages.
Rumi, Alan Watts, Ram Dass, Dolores Cannon, Rodney Dangerfield.
The idea that we’re simply standing on a stage, playing our parts, putting on a show for all of creation to see.
A show that can teach, inspire, invigorate, expand, and, most of all…experience.
For only in the show can one truly feel the emotions and adventures of the characters therein.
And that’s there all the magic sits. Right here. Smack dab in the middle of the experience.
If you knew that, how would it change how you go about your day? How would it influence your interactions with others? How would it change your level of enthusiasm about the things you have to do, versus the things you get to do?”
If you woke up within the dream, realized it’s a dream, and were told you still had several more years, even decades to experience the dream, how would you approach the rest of it?
Would you play out the string?
Or make this dream something so profound, so explosively exciting, so unbelievably adventurous…that it would be worth remembering when you finally wake up?
Night skies ring with the songs that
sing of one love for all.
Countless stars in their vast array
sing in silence, night and day,
of their love for all.
Our own mother star rains its warmth
on earth with a mighty power,
feeding every speck with life.
Rocked in earth’s green arms,
fed by living rain, all are
braided into one breathing whole.
Sing the song then
you were given on the
first day of the world.
You belong here,
you are part of
one great choir.
Let your light shine as it’s
meant to, loose the songs
that your throat holds.
You can’t hide them,
locked in silence
still they will sing.
Let their laughter drown your terrors–
love will find you if you let it, will
embrace you as your songs fall into place.
The landscape of American manufacturing has undergone a dramatic transformation over the past several decades. Once the powerhouse of global production, the United States has seen a significant portion of its manufacturing sector move overseas, with the brunt of the impact felt by both blue-collar workers and local economies.
The Human SideBehind the statistics on industrial output lies the human toll of a nation striving to redefine itself. People’s livelihoods have been affected, shifting populations as work dried up in once-prosperous manufacturing hubs. The blue-collar workers of these areas—many of whom poured their lifetimes into these jobs—have witnessed the erosion of a way of life.
With layoffs, employees and their families lost.
- Wages
- Medical benefits
- Life insurance
- Dental and vision benefits
- Their homes
They were unable to buy food, pay for vehicles and rent/mortgage and support their children’s school activities. The ability to move for another opportunity is diminished due to the inability to sell their homes in a jobless community and being re-educated at 100,000’s for a 4-year degree was out of site.
Today the disaster is no different from the past for American workers, but the success remains the same for American political environment of profitability.
History is important.
The political disaster for Americans started along time ago but let’s begin in 1977.
1977
Black Monday in the Steel Valley (from Mahoning and Trumbull counties in Ohio eastward toward Pittsburgh). Youngstown Sheet and Tube abruptly furloughed 5,000 workers in one day.
Political madness was controlled by.
- — President Jimmy Carter.
- — Vice President Walter F. Mondale.
- — Congress both chambers retained a Democratic majority.
- — Governor James Allen Rhodes, Republican.
- — Governor Richard F. Celeste, Democrat.
The bleeding has never stopped.
2024
It’s an election year and politicians once again will take center stage to perform.
Ohio’s Senator Race
- — President Joe Biden takes a tougher stance on trade with China. After 50+ years in politics he has finally realized that Chaina exists.
- — Sherrod Brown and Bernie Moreno have both criticized unfair Chinese trade practices. Since 2007, Brown seemed to be missing from the conversion.
- — Brown wants a ban on Chinese imports of electric vehicles. Why? The scam of electric vehicles should be over.
After the 2024 political performances nothing will change. Hopefully, voters don’t continue to believe in the political spin. However, manufacturing is stirring the pot for voters in Ohio.
There have been too many manufacturing losses to list in Ohio over the decades which continue today. Listed below are some of the most recent layoffs that the 2024 election will be focused on and a review of a few from a historical perspective.
2003
160,000 factory jobs lost in three years in Ohio.
2.7 million manufacturing jobs were lost nationwide in the same three years.
Political responsibility.
- President Bill Clinton, Democrat
- Vice President Al Gore, Democrat
- Governor Nancy Hollister, Republican
- Both chambers of the state legislature, Republican, 2000/1999
- President George W. Bush, Republican
- Vice President Dick Cheney, Republican
- Governor Robert Alphonso Taft III, Republican
- Both chambers of the state legislature, Republican, 2001/2002
2011
3,500 factories over the last 10 years.
“While I believe Ohioans deserve a level playing field when it comes to trade with China, I oppose this legislation because it will hurt our economy and result in fewer jobs for Ohioans,” U.S. House Speaker John Boehner, R, 2011.
2019
- — GM, Lordstown plant – 1,600 employees.
2021
- — Fiesta Tableware Company – 59 employees.
2023
- — Whitehouse aluminum can plant.
- — The W.H. Sammis coal power plant – 140 employees.
- — Honeywell – 66 employees.
- — Honeywell, Intelligrated facility, West Chester – 223 employees.
- — Sherwin Williams – 50 employees.
- — Tenneco – 597 employees.
2024
- — Steelmaker Cleveland-Cliffs – 900 employees.
- — Honeywell, Fairfield facility, 66 employees (by the end of 2024)
- — VS Direct Fulfillment LLC, Victoria’s Secret call center – 120 employees.
- — Bernard Soap Company, a subsidiary of Procter and Gamble – 118 employees.
- — Post Holdings – 200 employees.
- — Linamar Structures USA – 100 employees.
- — Nestlé – 216 workers.
- — Chillicothe manufacturer – 79 employees.
- — Cleveland-Cliffs Inc. – 900 employees. The organization states it can’t compete with tariffs.
“We worked very closely with our partners at the USW on this solution to save Weirton, and together fought tirelessly for its survival. In what was our final effort to maintain tinplate production here in America, we proved that we are forced to operate on an uneven playing field, and that the deck was stacked in favor of the importers. Despite the Department of Commerce finding evidence of dumping and subsidization from respondent countries, the ITC shockingly ruled against imposition of tariffs, keeping the uneven playing field in place and making it impossible for us to viably produce tinplate.” Lourenco Goncalves, Cleveland-Cliffs’ Chairman, President and Chief Executive Officer
2025
- — Honeywell, Intelligrated manufacturing London facility – 98 employees (May 2025).
How Does Ohio Survive?Today, 14% of good paying jobs with benefits in Ohio are in manufacturing out of a population of 11.76 million (2022). Beside the few people that work in manufacturing, the top three job categories and average pay in 2022 included.
- Fast food and counter workers – $11.94 per hour. Soon to be replaced with technology.
- Registered nurses – $36.93 per hour.
- Stock and order fillers – $16.60 per hour. Soon to be replaced with technology.
- General and operations managers – $36.93 per hour. Soon to experience employee downsizing due to technology.
The sell out of manufacturing and the creation of low pay service industry jobs has affected the entire nation, especially Ohio. The results have caused 13.9% poverty, 80% of Ohioans struggling to survive and average cost of a house according Bank Rate is $275,461, 2023, indicating most people in Ohio can’t afford a middle-class standard of living.
Ohio’s current political madness.
- — Governor Mike DeWine, Republican.
- — Governor Jon Husted, Republican.
- — Both chambers of the state legislature, Republican.
- — President Biden, Democrat.
- — Vice President Harris, Democrat.
Votes Matter.
The Illusion of AffiliationAt the heart of every election, voters are urged to pick a side, to wear their party affiliation like a badge of honor, and to cast their ballots often in line with the well-defined narratives of ‘left’ and ‘right’. But what does party loyalty truly signify amid a complex issue like immigration or fair trading, where candidates often cherry-pick talking points that resonate within their party base rather than pursuing comprehensive solutions?
Additionally, congressional members worried TikTok because of the Chinese organization security issues of American information, the same information the US government tracks violating Americans privacy, vs. debating decades of shipping American jobs to China and other parts of the world.
What does party loyalty have to do with arguing politicians over a social media platform vs. fair trade policy?
Nothing.
Votes don’t matter without accountability.
For the better part of the last decade, I have been on LinkedIn where I would average close to 3500 views for many of the posts I did. Several of them went viral, A lot of them were blog posts in which I attempted to educate new business owners on the ins and outs of effective communication. I published more than 300 blog posts when they gave a shit about that stuff. And I commented a great deal on the posts I both agreed and disagreed with.
You could say I was a pretty good member. I can only recall getting three warnings, but there were probably a few more since I am vehemently anti-idiocy.
Over the years I had built up a modest following of about 3500 souls.
Then one day, about a week ago now I found myself locked out of the site. The way to get back in was to go through what turned out to be a constantly repetitious set of functions that took me absolutely nowhere.
The only reason I have any presence on that site at the moment is because my posts are being published by my friends at BizCatalyst 360°. I hope they will publish this one because perhaps it will get through to someone at LinkedIn who can, at the very least, explain to me why this is happening.
LinkedIn, as many of us know, is primarily a recruitment site. But it’s also a site where a lot of business issues and political issues are discussed. And of course, they are, especially in America, where LinkedIn’s largest audience resides, pretty much intertwined.
As a Canadian who pays a lot of attention to US politics, I like to think that my point of view, if nothing else is semi-objective. If I were an American I would probably be a Democrat as opposed to a Republican, because in Canada I am pretty much a Liberal, mainly because the Conservative party in our country hasn’t had any solid leadership for decades.
The weird thing is that LinkedIn only tells you that you are in trouble and never bothers to explain why that is so you can course correct.
If I am in trouble for something I did, and they explained that to me, I would definitely stop doing whatever that was because A) I am not an idiot and b) I am a professional writer and it’s a relatively easy thing for me to do.
During the course of trying to get back on LinkedIn I reached out to a LinkedIn friend with whom I am also connected on Facebook, and he, in turn, reached to LinkedIn out on my behalf.
Lo and behold, the response he got was something that sent me to the same link I get every time I try and open LinkedIn myself. And round and round it went.
Sometimes I get the feeling that the lights are on there, but nobody’s home.
So for the past week, I have been in the process of learning to live without it. And you know what, life is not so bad. I belong to several other sites and it seems, at least at the moment, that the longer I live without access to LinkedIn, the less I miss it. The only thing I do miss about it is a small discussion group that I belonged to that consisted of four very bright people that I have gotten to know.
I can keep up to speed on a lot of the stuff that interests me, especially the wild west show that AI has turned into and the US political circus through several emails I receive regularly.
Plus, in a couple of weeks, my pool will be open and I can start meditating on a new series of short stories that I will write at the end of the summer season.
Who knows, maybe LinkedIn has actually done me a favour by locking me out the way they have. Hopefully, I will still have a presence there through my published BizCatalyst 360° posts. I’ll try to make them as useful as I can, because what’s the point of having more than fifty years of experience in the high end of any business, without being able to share your insights.
So to quote, the master, Bob Dylan, which I often do.
“Time will tell
Just who has fell
And who’s been left behind
When you go your way
And I go mine”
When I was growing up, our next-door neighbors had some … uh … peculiar notions about housecleaning. As sons of a Marine, my younger brother, Keith, and I would walk into their living room and be astounded at the volume of clutter, the nature of the clutter, and the general lack of order or cleanliness.
One day, Keith, who’s always been the smarter and sharper-witted of the two of us, said, “Holy shit. If aliens ever came down and landed in their living room, the aliens would open the door of their spaceship, look around, and say, “What the hell?!”
To this day, the idea that extraterrestrials would necessarily have that point of earthly reference makes me laugh out loud.
Different Strokes
I understand one man’s pig pen can be another man’s paradise. I get that tastes, styles, tolerances, preference, and priorities differ. It could also be a sign of having too much stuff, making it difficult to organize and maintain a clean environment. Or as George Carlin put it:
Have you noticed that their stuff is shit and your shit is stuff? God! And you say, “Get that shit offa there and let me put my stuff down! (Thank you, Mac Bogert.)
On a more serious note, failure to keep one’s home clean can have negative effects on physical and mental health, lead to feelings of stress, anxiety, lack of control, and even depression. But it’s hard to tell, and we shouldn’t be quick to judge, regardless of what extraterrestrials might have to say about it.
That Was Then
In case you haven’t noticed, things have gotten significantly worse since then. And I don’t mean at that next-door neighbors’ house. I mean with the world. The world’s house is in disorder. We’re letting ourselves be divided, be pandered to. We’re devolving into lesser versions of ourselves. We’re judging, fearing, hating, and killing each other. And by and large, we’re acting as if that’s okay.
It’s reminiscent of the philosophical/psychological question of whether fish know they’re in water. It’s likely fish have no conscious awareness of being in water. They’ve adapted to their aquatic environment, thrive in it, and lack the cognitive ability to conceive of their being in water, to imagine any other environment, or to perceive water as a medium with which they interact. They probably experience water as an integral part of their environment, inseparable from it, perhaps in the same way we experience air as invisible, largely intangible, and as much a part of us as we are of it.
Maybe we’ve lived in an environment of corruption for so long — divided, pandered to, devolving into lesser versions of ourselves, judging, fearing, hating, and killing each other — that corruption is like water to the fish. It’s undiscernible to us, and we’re inseparable from it. If that’s the case, it’s as sad as it is wasteful and dangerous.
Plan B
Maybe we can start to recognize and free ourselves from the divided, pandered, devolving versions of ourselves in which we judge, fear, hate, and kill each other by taking personal responsibility for keeping our houses clean. In so doing, maybe we can free ourselves from the negative effects on our physical and mental health like feelings of stress, anxiety, lack of control, and even depression. The fact is I don’t know. But I do know, unless we try, none of us will ever know. We all have to share this third stone from the sun. We don’t have to expose extraterrestrials to the distress we’re inflicting on ourselves.
And we don’t have to compel them to ask, “What the hell?!”
(1)It came,
Out of a corner
Wet.
It came,
Unexpectedly
And yet,
I let it roll
Slowly,
Out of the corner,
Of
My
Eye.
And across the bridge
Of
My
Nose.
Down my right cheek,
To drop
Upon
The pillow
In its case.
I felt it go.
It was cold.
You know.
I let it go,
And it was,
Very,
Very
Slow.
(2)And as it rolled
From the corner of
My
Eye,
I realized,
I was going
To
Silently
Cry.
Tear for my Momma B
In a rehab facility.
Tear for more,
Oh, what’s in store?
Tear for you,
Tear for me,
Here for you,
Here for me.
The naysayers who
Told me to stop,
And
The ones who told me
Go find a lane,
And
Those who said
I’m too much,
And
Those who said
You’re out of touch.
(3)Well, that tear
Rolled
And yes,
it felt
Cold.
Yet,
It warmed my heart
To get out of bed
With a place to start.
So, that’s what I did,
And I’ll do it again,
For it is only a matter of time now
And who knows when?
When that tear will embolden me,
For myself, you and others,
Who may not or may
See if we have our druthers.
Hope, a person,
Hope, a feeling,
Hope as a future note
Worthy of seeing and hearing.
(4)It’s that tear, that hope,
That I will carry today,
And it may come calling to you, someday.
You, what will you do with your
Tear
And
Your hope?
May you smile,
May your cry,
May you walk a mile,
May you slowly
Dry your eye.
May you hug,
May I cheer,
May I for each of you
Far and near?
For hope is a tear
That is not to fear.
Thank you now,
Thank you then,
Thank you whoever and wherever,
You need this poem.
The second largest expense for most companies is HealthCare with relentlessly increasing premiums. The burden is so onerous most larger companies have decided to Self-Insure and accept the risk themselves. Employee Health claims are a perceived fixed cost in the sense that the decision maker for the Employer (i.e. CFO, Owner) does not monitor the actual individual claims, other than to typically require their Employees to get approval for more complex HealthCare procedures.
Whether an Employee needs an X-Ray to find out if they broke their wrist, a blood test to check their cholesterol, or an out-patient surgery such as getting a mammogram, the Employee is provided with all the choices where they are going to have the procedure done whether that is at a Hospital, Surgery Center, Clinic, or facility that provides the services that they need to have completed, including the facility that offers the best price. Employers and Employees alike are provided an online portal to access all the info.
Most Employers are not aware that due to current regulatory oversight in the United States, Private Equity firms have been allowed to not only purchase equity interests in the Insurance Companies underwriting HealthCare policies; but, also have been actively acquiring equity interests in the HealthCare providers themselves such as Hospitals and Outpatient Clinics. In this children’s fable, the fox now owns the henhouse and the hens!
The Employer has not had a solution that can provide real-time comparative cost savings within the geographic area proximate to their business or where their Employees reside. This means that the Employer, systemically, is paying a substantial amount of money more on an annual basis to subsidize their Employee HealthCare than they need to be paying in most of the gateway and secondary Cities in the United States, where there are multiple choices available for the same HealthCare procedure.
The good news is that there is now an option for the Employer to engage the services of an online HealthCare appointment oversight service that operates on a performance based shared benefit basis without any set-up fee or monthly subscription fees.
Here is how it works. Eligible businesses or organizations which are those that pay for their own Employees HealthCare costs are known to be Self-Insured, and have been in business for over three (3) years. While any Self-Insured entity is eligible, typically half those businesses and organizations who have over five-hundred (500) W-2 Employees. Statistically, 98% of businesses with one-thousand (1,000) or more Employees.
Once they have signed up, they provide the service provider with their historical claims data for the past three (3) to five (5) years. That data provides a comprehensive benchmark showing what the Employer was paying for HealthCare services such as Colonoscopy’s, MRI’s, Blood Tests, and X-Rays prior to them engaging the services of the HealthCare cost optimization provider.
The cost savings that are being identified include: 1) Bloodwork, 2) Imaging, 3) Urgent Care, which does not require getting an appointment which can include getting diagnosed and treating maladies such as Back Pain, Cold or Flu, Cuts or Small Wounds, Diarrhea, Earache or Sinus Pain, Minor Fever or Headache, Minor injury such as a Sprained Ankle, Painful Sore Throat, Rash or Minor Allergic Reaction, Small Burns, Urinary Tract Infections, or the Employee’s Primary Care Doctor’s Office is closed. 4) Surgeries, which can include Cataract, Colonoscopy, Ear-Nose-Throat, Endoscopy, Gall Bladder, Gynecological Procedures, Hemodialysis, Hemorrhoid Procedures, Lumpectomy, Minor Orthopedic, Skin Procedures, Urologic Procedures.
Prior to this new technology, when an Employee needed a medical procedure, they would just make an appointment. As an Employer, you had no idea how much money that medical appointment was going to cost you. So, if your Employee needed an MRI Exam, you might be paying an additional $2,000 for the same exam where there was another In-Network HealthCare provider that your Employee could have made an appointment with that charged $2,000 less for the same procedure. Now, when your Employee needs a medical procedure, you know the total cost of every provider that is delivering the same service.
The HealthCare Cost Saving Service provider which uses a proprietary Artificial Intelligence (AI) technology that provides the Employer with the myriad of HealthCare Appointment options has historically achieved gross savings of 40-55%, which means that Employers engaging their services can expect a net 20-27.5% cost savings by signing up for their services. So, if an Employer is paying $1,000,000 a year to cover their Employees Outpatient HealthCare costs, they can expect to pay only $725,000-800,000.
After each month, the Employer will be billed $1 for every $2 that the HealthCare Medical Appointment Cost Optimization service provider has obtained for them. In other words, every time that the HealthCare Medical Appointment Cost Optimization provider saves the Employer $2, the month after those cost savings have been realized, based on the Employers historical prior HealthCare Claims provided to the service provider, the Employer pays back the HealthCare Appointment Cost Optimization service provider $1. Simply put, if you buy a carton of milk at a Convenience Store, such as 7/11, you are going to pay more for that carton of milk than buying the same carton of milk from a wholesaler such as Costco. The Employer has the option of having their Staff look up HealthCare procedure options in real-time when an Employee in need of a procedure makes a request to have a medical appointment or allow the Employee to utilize the online comparative cost pricing to identify the lowest cost provider for the same procedure in their geographic area.
The Employer can establish in their Employee Handbook their policy of allowing the Employee to schedule their own HealthCare procedures by indicating to them that it must be the most cost-effective one identified.
He bore the name of the Prophet.We had a little difficulty meeting. I was not in the place he expected me to be and the app-map did not have all the street names. The dealership called him, a service meant to offset labor prices double what I usually pay. There was no charge for the recall, of course, but I understood that the mechanic would “inspect” my six year old vehicle and prescribe further work, which I would verify with my usual mechanic, or not.
“Are you buying a car?” Mohammad asked.
“No, just service.”
“Not something you could not do yourself?”
“A recall. But I don’t do much work myself anymore. I used to work on cars, but not anymore. I don’t understand them – too many computers.”
This seemed not to compute with this old Uber driver. “Not even changing the oil? Or brakes?”
“I figure at 76 I can let someone else do that.”
“We are the same age, but I like to keep my hand in.”
“I understand. Keeping skills up is valuable.” I relayed my recent failure soldering. “It seems I completely forgot how.”
“Soldering? I could never do that.”
We chatted about the weather, as everyone seems to, then he got around to the inevitable “What do you do?” question. I skipped the part where I responded “retirement” and he responded, “but before?”
“I’m a writer.”
“Oh? What do you write?”
“Non-fiction mostly. I just self-published a career advice book for young consultants Traveling the Consulting Road. This didn’t seem to interest him. “I also publish some things from conversations I have with ordinary people I meet.”
“Oh? Like what?”
“Well, I often ask people, ‘What is the secret of life?’”
“Oh?’
“Yes, imagine a young person sits before you, asks for your life wisdom. What do you say?”
He seemed intrigued. He missed the next turn the GPS suggested.
“That seems such a simple question, but it is very deep.”
I smiled. Mohammad was thinking. This question always takes people by surprise. Most, not all, feel compelled to answer.
“I can only answer this from my faith. People say that Islam means peace, but that is not quite right. There is a kind of peace in it, but Islam means surrender.”
“I had no choice in my birth. I will have no choice in my death; it will come whenever. . . . But in between I have many choices, far too many choices. This is my test. That is the problem of a life. But if I make one choice, if I choose to surrender to the will of God, other choices get easier.”
“People will say ‘ How can I know the will of God?’ but they know – in here.“ He tapped his chest lightly. If ever they do not know what is the right thing to do, stop . . . listen. It seldom takes longer than three heartbeats. If my action helps me, but hurts another, that is not the will of God. If it helps another, and does not cost me dearly, what would stop me?”
I responded that Christians also talk about the Will of God, Buddhists about the eight-fold path and Taoists speak of about The Way.
“Faith is our connection to God, not any particular faith, but faith, and most of all. . . living it.”
We went on to talk about the nature of people (“99% good”), cars (“simpler is better”), food (“ a little that’s good is better than a lot”). And then, some forty minutes later, we said “nice talking with you,” and he dropped me at home.
I always learn something when I ask this question. I am not a religious person, but people often go to the Golden Rule or say that we shouldn’t be “hung up on materials things” or that “hate is toxic.” A few, like Mohammad I believe, are people who try to live their faith.
I will remember the gentle way he tapped his chest in reference to knowing the Will of God.
“They know – in here. And if not – stop . . . listen. It seldom takes longer than three heartbeats.”
I’ve been known to quote the late Andy Rooney, CBS “Sixty Minutes” curmudgeon, on religion: “I’d be more willing to accept religion, even if I didn’t believe it, which I don’t, if I thought it made people nicer to each other, but I don’t think it does.”
I further opine “too many wars have been fought in the name of a belief in God,” but then I think of someone who lives their faith, like the late Fred Rogers, PBS children’s TV creator, or perhaps this gentle Uber driver and I admire their certainty and the luminous path they describe.
Henceforth, I will endeavor to practice his three heartbeat rule. Will you?
heart broken
wide open
new ground
turned and tilled
seeds take root
future fruit bearing.
The wind caressed the trees of the deep forest and it made a sound so soft you would think that it was a whisper that you were hearing.
Olivia leaned in close to Joshua’s ear and said,” The wind, it sounds like Midnight Whispers, a sound that only we can hear.” They could hear the wind unleashing the unwritten stories that rested inside them both.
The stories were about the love that they shared, the love that awakened on a rainy night as they walked down a dark street with only a small umbrella to keep them dry. As the years past The Midnight Whispers gifted them with new stories, beautiful paintings and the community love them and the things they did to give back.
Tonight was their night, a night where their love for each other was powerful and bountiful in its many times they gave back to the community, in abundance and without expectation. It was a time that their love filled them with joy, kindness, and passion. They knew it would be a love that would last forever.
The wind whispered to them of the amazing things that would be unveiled in the coming years, and they knew it would be a love without end. They held each other close, embracing the love they felt with for each other. Angels guided the path they walked, creativity would be what they would share, inspiration would drive the stories and Olivia’s beautiful painting. The future would be filled with abundance, their love without end and their imagination would be unleashed.
The wind became calm and the stories faded, as it was past the midnight whispers. Soon the dawn will awaken them to the new day and new beginning.
I dedicate this story to Raissa Urdiales, my friend, poet, writer, storyteller, and an amazing collaborator. Thank you for your kindness my friend.
It’s amazing how people will play you if given half a chance. As I’ve been played like a flute, I know whereof I speak. Because I’m kind and responsive to people who engage with my work, they believe I’m an easy mark.
I’m not.
Let me give you an example. A recent one as individuals who should know better have tried to entice me to share my screenwriting knowledge with them for Bubkis by using flattery.
Learning to write screenplays and navigate the entertainment industry has taken much of my life, but I wouldn’t have it any other way as that is my passion. For over twenty years, I’ve studied the craft, followed the players, read script after script, and worked my ass off. I’ve experienced triumphs and setbacks yet, at seventy, I’m still at it.
So, when someone approaches me who wants to pick my brain to fast-track the craft much like a side hustle and to satisfy a whim to “try” screenwriting, that lack of sensitivity and commitment infuriates me. Especially when they want to pick it for free.
The other day, I received a glowing review on a Medium story from a young woman who started following me and said that she’d love to connect on Twitter as she wanted to write a documentary, and saw from my profile that I’m a screenwriter. But, she told me she couldn’t find me. I don’t know what she expected me to do for her on Twatter, or X as it’s now called, but that’s what she said.
Now, this part is on me. I told her to feel free to shoot me an email. And then I forgot about it. She, on the other hand, did not. In her email, she asked if we could set up a time for a phone chat. My initial answer was “Sure,” but then, after thinking about it, I sent her another reply.
“What, exactly, do you want to discuss?” I knew it had something to do with screenwriting and it occurred to me that perhaps I was going to do what I’ve done in the past: Waste an hour or so of my time answering questions and getting nothing but a “thanks for your time,” for it.
When I was still employed, the nitwit who became the head of our creative team, and who I’d known for years from other agencies, approached me one day to tell me that she was writing a script. She then asked if I’d give it a read and share my “thoughts.”
Well, my thoughts were that it sucked, and it did, people. But, of course, I couldn’t tell her if I expected to ever get another salary increase. Instead, we went to lunch and I plied her with a shit ton of feedback for her shitty script. And, I provided in-depth notes for that turd. In return, I got f##ked over on Valentine’s Day, 2018 when she laid off me and several of my teammates on a day that we were working remotely. Yes. We got involuntarily separated from our livelihoods over the phone.
Through the years, I’ve helped many would-be writers and screenwriters, out of the goodness of my crusty heart. And here I am. Still struggling. Still writing for cents on the dollar.
Uh-uh. No more. As in no more free coaching.
Now, I’m not saying this young woman from Medium was trying to play me, but unfortunately, that’s how you have to think these days because we’re surrounded by scammers. Disgusting, scum-sucking, bottom-feeders who will do anything, but work for a living. Again, please understand that I’m not talking about this gal as she seems very nice. It’s me, okay? I’m tired of giving my all and getting little in return.
She quickly answered my question by telling me that she hoped that I could “teach her a thing or two,” and provided her calendar so I could set up a time to do just that.
It didn’t take me long to conclude that the “Twelfth of Never” would be the best time for me. No more freebies, for anyone.
I told the wannabe screenwriter that she should read scripts. As many as she could, and beyond that, I’m available for coaching. At a fee.
I didn’t hear back.
Visiting Prague, the heart of the Czech Republic, is a dream for many travelers. With its rich history, storybook architecture, and vibrant arts scene, the city has much to offer. But like any trip, a successful visit to this European jewel requires a bit of planning and local insight. Whether you’re a first-time visitor or a seasoned explorer, these tips will help you have an experience you’ll never forget.
- Brush Up on the Language and Local Customs
Czech may not be the easiest language to master but learning a few basic phrases can go a long way. Locals appreciate the effort, and you’ll find that many will warm up to you more quickly if you start a conversation in their native tongue. Additionally, familiarize yourself with local customs such as removing your shoes when entering someone’s home or knowing that it’s polite to wait for your host to propose a toast before taking a sip of your drink.
- Stroll the Lesser-Visited Neighborhoods
While the Old Town and Prague Castle offer the most iconic sights, don’t overlook the charm of Prague’s lesser-visited neighborhoods. Malá Strana is a fairytale district of baroque buildings and serene gardens. Žižkov, known for its TV Tower with bizarre baby sculptures, is a hotspot for nightlife and street art. Vinohrady boasts beautiful residential architecture and numerous trendy cafes. Exploring these areas will give you a more nuanced view of the city. The city and neighborhoods are easy to walk around.
- Get an Early Start to Beat the Crowds
Prague is popular, and rightfully so. But with popularity comes crowds, especially during peak tourist season. To make the most of your visit without being elbow-to-elbow with other tourists, get an early start to your day. Many popular attractions open at 9 AM or earlier, so set your alarm and head out before the masses arrive. I’ve found that a good time to visit is in September or October.
- Try Traditional Czech Cuisine
No trip to Prague is complete without trying some traditional Czech cuisine. From hearty dishes like goulash and dumplings to tasty pastries like trdelník, there’s something for every type of foodie. Don’t be afraid to venture off the beaten path and try a small local restaurant for an authentic dining experience.
- Get Lost in the Streets
One of the best ways to discover the hidden gems of Prague is by getting lost in its streets. Wander away from the main tourist areas and explore the narrow cobblestone lanes and hidden courtyards. You never know what charming café or quaint boutique you may stumble upon.
- Take a River Cruise
For a unique perspective of the city, take a river cruise along the Vltava River. You can choose from a variety of tours, including daytime sightseeing cruises and evening dinner cruises. This is a great way to relax and see the city from a different angle.
Prague is my favorite international city, consider enjoying the wonders of city and neighborhoods!
As many of you know from following me, I’ve struggled mightily for most of my life with making ends meet, and then just getting by, and then feeling like I had a handle on things, to now enjoying the fruits of the growth in my money vibe and consciousness.
When you feel challenged with finances in your life, it’s essential to develop a strong money mindset that empowers you to overcome obstacles and manifest abundance. It’s a task that is far easier said than done, as you probably already know.
If you’re looking to transform your relationship with money and achieve financial freedom, then you’re in luck! Today I am sending you a replay of the Masterclass, “Money Mindset for Challenging Times.”
If this is an area where you’re struggling right now, give yourself the gift of time and focus to watch, take notes, and internalize the teachings in this session.
Here are some of the highlights:
Determine and Overcome Limiting Beliefs:The first step towards financial transformation is identifying the beliefs that may be sabotaging your desires. Through a quick and easy quiz in this session, I help you determine if 11 specific money beliefs are blocking your path to abundance. By uncovering these limiting beliefs, you gain valuable insights into what may have been holding you back and can begin the journey towards releasing them.
Strategies for Empowering Relationships with Money:Later in the session, I share three powerful strategies to reverse low-vibe beliefs and cultivate an empowering relationship with money that will guide you for the rest of your life. These strategies go beyond simply earning more money and address the underlying mindset that can alleviate your money stress. Discover how to shift your perspective and create a positive narrative around money, inviting abundance to flow into your life.
Learn from Real-Life Success:One of the highlights of this masterclass is my personal story. I’ve provided an intimate account of the exact steps and strategies she used to go from being homeless to building multiple 7-figure assets. I hope that my sometimes tumultuous journey inspires you and shows you that regardless of your starting point, financial prosperity is within reach.
The Science Behind Financial Conditioning:Have you ever wondered why some people seem naturally inclined towards financial success while others struggle to make ends meet? I remember that feeling. So, many years ago, I decided to learn what was behind this notion. I learned the ways in which your mind creates your financial condition. In this session you will gain a deeper understanding of the connection between your thoughts, beliefs, and your financial reality. Armed with this knowledge, you can begin to rewire your mindset for abundance and capitalize on the power of thought to shape your financial journey.
Strategies to Elevate Your Money Mindset:To elevate and expand your money mindset, specific strategies are shared that will propel you towards new levels of abundance. By implementing these strategies, you will gain a fresh perspective on money, allowing you to attract and manifest greater financial wealth. Unlock your true earning potential and break free from self-imposed limitations.
If you’re ready to elevate your money mindset and embrace a path of financial freedom, don’t miss out on the replay of the “Money Mindset for Challenging Times“ Masterclass. Immerse yourself in this 90-minute session and gain the knowledge and tools necessary to transform your financial reality.
CLICK HERE to access the REPLAY “Money Mindset for Challenging Times”
It’s time to begin your transformation today and embrace the path to financial freedom!
Hello to you listening on Mercer Island, Washington! Coming to you from Whidbey Island, Washington this is Stories From Women Who Walk with 60 Seconds for Wednesdays on Whidbey and your host, Diane Wyzga.
Imagine that voicing your ideas is an act of creation. When we have the courage to use our voice to speak our mind to say what we mean and mean what we say we have taken a bold and beautiful step toward making happen what we desire. Our best chance of being seen, heard, understood and listened to is by speaking with intention. Together we can find the words you didn’t know you had to speak your ideas with confidence and conviction to make the change you seek.
CTA: Whether you are ready to work with me as your trusted story guide or getting ready to be ready, I’m here to support you at Quarter Moon Story Arts!
You’re always invited: “Come for the stories – stay for the magic!” Speaking of magic, would you subscribe, share a 5-star rating + nice review on your social media or podcast channel of choice, and join us next time!
Meanwhile, stop by my Quarter Moon Story Arts website to:
✓ Check out What I Offer,
✓ Arrange your free Story Start-up Session,
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✓ Stay current with Diane and on LinkedIn.
Stories From Women Who Walk Production Team
Podcaster: Diane F Wyzga & Quarter Moon Story Arts
Music: Mer’s Waltz from Crossing the Waters by Steve Schuch & Night Heron Music
A truly enlightening Friendship Bench. A gathering of friends, fostering good will and togetherness; exploring many horizons. The topic was ‘Expectations’, which expanded beyond………..expectations.
Missions, beliefs, judgement, expectations of oneself or others. Imaginary expectations. Dreams of future desires. Listening within a quantum space is one element visited.
Are people happy if they have personal demands they wish to reach and ultimately accomplish? Demotivated and afraid to re-invent themselves. Synergy with inspiration and expectations. Drive out any negativity and choose a realistic mission. Succeeding being a stem to success.
Are we victims of our own expectations? Essentially, expectations can be positive. Or we don’t achieve what we desired and targeted ourselves.
Power, positive energy. And a two-way street. Works both way. What we expect of ourselves and others.
Applied to others, where our expectations are not reached, can be disappointing; or visa versa of course. And coincidence? I am currently reading Charles Dickens’ ‘Great Expectations’! Quite a lesson, but not all positive!
Aspirational expectations; ultimately positive. Freedom of the gut. Release the power. View others with reality, comparing them with your own emotions and belief in yourself.
Believe in yourself and keep a door open for others.
heart broken
explodes fragments scattered strewn
the jigsaw picture pieces
shattered lost
no replacements in sight.
The Pleiades’ primary reason for communicating with Billy and supplying the physical evidence was for the purpose of creating an awareness that other intelligent life exists in the universe, both good and bad by our standards, human and nonhuman in form.
~ Shirley MacLaine, award-winning actress
Pleiadian Cosmonaut Semjase told farmer Billy, “We feel duty bound to the citizens of Earth because our forefathers were your forefathers.”
In a UFO case steeped in controversy that began forty-five years ago in Switzerland, before home computers, digital photography, and easily accessible photo enhancement programs, contactee Eduard (Billy) Meier1, described as a humble one-armed Swiss farmer with a 5th-grade education, maintained contact with alien beings and their starships from the star cluster Pleiades.2
During the Dreaming Healing Video Podcast, guest Britt Elders, CEO of ShirleyMacLaine.com, a documentary filmmaker, and an investigative author of UFO…The contact from the Pleiades Volumes I & II shared information on her investigation. It became quite clear that we Earthlings share more in common with the Pleiades than just our physical appearance.
According to Brit Elder’s documented investigative interviews, Billy photographed the spaceships and regularly conversed with Pleades’ cosmonauts. A female cosmonaut named Semjase (pronounced Sem-YA’see) shared profound wisdom that still aligns with our modern-day concepts of the Law of Attraction, Love Never Dies, and the Gestalt Theory of Completeness—Think it-Create it.
This story began with Brit Elders’ “7 Dream.”
Brit’s dream was seven snippets of dreams seven nights a week (7 days) before her journey to Switzerland to investigate the UFO sightings. Seven is an Angelic number, as in Angels on High. The number 7 in dreams may also let you know you are on the right path in life— 777.
But do the Pleiades come in conquest or in peace?
According to recorded conversations between the cosmonauts and the farmer, they are not interested in interfering with Earth. They are simply observing our progress, as they have done since the beginning of our species. If this seems a bit far-fetched, consider how we observe and photograph the animal population’s progress on Earth.
Are we so different?
How long have they visited Earth? And what do they see for us Earthlings in the near future? Host Kat Kanavos asked these questions to Bret Elders, who had asked them to farmer Billy. The answers will astound you.
According to Semjase and my paraphrase, we must learn to play better in our Small Earthly Sandbox and not hit each other over the head with our toys before we are invited to play with “others” in the Big Universal Sandbox. We’re still growing, but according to Semjase, there is still hope for growth for the naughty children of planet Earth.
Many of us may have heard of Project Blue Book or watched the series on Television. Do you remember the ’70s UFO abduction case of Betty & Barney Hill in New Hampshire? Or the documented story Silver Space Ship Aliens Save My Life in Dreams That Can Save Your Life: Early Warning Dreams of Cancer and Other Diseases by survivor Dana Anderson and the drug Interferon that saved her (then still in trial phase for AIDS) handed to her by Aliens in a Silver Space Ship? There are many abduction stories.
But, there have been few places that report constant sightings.
That changes with this V-article. The Dreaming Healing show link is available for your viewing pleasure at the end of this article.
Can other beings from other planets, galaxies, and Universes “out there” visit here? Many humans, including scientists, air traffic controllers, everyday people, and Pleiades cosmonaut Semjase, say “Yes!”
So, where is the UFO proof? It’s printed in Brit Elders’ book!
The evidence— breathtaking images— analyzed in laboratories worldwide— could not be easily dismissed and supported the contactee’s claims, Billy Meier. The extensive investigation spanned seven years, and the UFO information is as relevant today as it was then, as seen by the government’s recent release of UAP (Unidentified Aerial Phenomena &/or Unidentified Anomalous Phenomena) material.
Matter is the embodiment of an idea.”~ Semjase, Pleiadian cosmonaut
The above Pleiades’ quote sounds like modern psychology’s Gestalt Theory- the mental process of configuring entire patterns that can be duplicated and organized as a whole on the physical plane. Earth’s 5th Dimension (5D) visioning brought into the physical 3rd Dimension (3D)- a form of Gestaltism- think it in the whole and create it piece by piece in the physical realm back into the imagined whole.
Here are more profound words of ancient wisdom from Pleiades’ cosmonauts Semjase and Ptaah, quoted in the book, which still rings true today on Earth and may help explain our theories. Where might we have gotten these words of wisdom?
- Answering the timeless Earth questions: Who am I? Where am I from, why am I here, and what is my purpose? “We, too, are still far removed from perfection and have to evolve constantly, just like yourselves. We are neither superior nor superhuman, nor are we missionaries…We feel duty-bound to the citizens of Earth because our forefathers were your forefathers. ~ Semjase, Pleiadian cosmonaut, February 8, 1975 (Volume I, pg. xvv)
- Earth’s Law of Attraction- “When a being is happy, luck appears everywhere in his life because luck is a self-creating state and comes from within the individual. It is a quality of the inner being and an inseparable spark of the spirit, which contains infinite force in its existence. ~Semjase, Pleiadian cosmonaut, 1977 (Volume I, pg.16)
- Love Never Dies- “Love is the instrument with which one may spread the eternal force that can never be extinguished, which overcomes death and spreads light, which embodies the poise of wisdom, peace, and all that exceeds understanding.” ~Semjase, Pleiadian cosmonaut, 1977 (Volume II, pg.116)
- The Big NOW we strive for in Meditation and Zen, and accomplish in Precognitive Dreams that show us the future. “To us, time is nothing but the immediate.”~ Ptaah, Pleiadian cosmonaut, 1977 (Volume II, pg.115)
If the Earth could talk, what a tale it could tell.
~ Anonymous
For the first time—forty-five years after their original publication—the two photo-journal volumes of UFO…Contact from the Pleiades is combined into one book for a modern audience.
Actress Shirley MacLaine writes the new foreword. Mexican UFOlogist Jamie Maussan writes a prologue, and a new introduction and preface are written by Brit Elders.
So, in conclusion, when it comes to other-world visits, if we have been waiting for “true proof” of Alien Contact, we may have it now. But what if…contact has always been happening? What if… yester-years Little Green Men are our beautiful ancestors, family members, or just neighbors saying “HI!” in the sky? When we look up into the night, are “they” looking down at us? Do we dare wave? Are we, as a species, ready to shake hands and break bread with “them,” these alien aspects of ourselves, and accept them as Distant Cousins?
When we can finally embrace “different” as neighbor rather than judge it as alien, perhaps we will be invited to gather up our toys and play with “them.”
Check out the pictures and photos in UFO…Contact from the Pleiades Vol 1&2 in the video podcast below and decide if we’re ready to play. And, according to farmer Billy, Pleiades’ beings are not little green men or women. They are beautiful… just like us!
About the guest: Brit Elders is an investigative author and documentary filmmaker who has traveled the world exploring various topics, including the mysterious world of UFOs. She has participated in several in-depth investigations, including the Billy Meier case and the waves of UFO sightings in Mexico, which began in 1991 and continue today. Brit, the CEO of ShirleyMacLaine.com, continues to research and write for herself and others. https://britelders.com https://www.facebook.com/BritEldersAuthor
Please enjoy your Dreaming Healing show below:
References:
- Billy Meier | Cosmic Paradigm. https://www.cosmicparadigm.com/ets-nonphysicals/billy-meier/
- ..Contact from the Pleiades (45th Anniversary Edition) Volumes I & – Beyond Words Publishing. https://beyondword.com/products/ufo-contact-from-the-pleiades-45th-anniversary-edition-volumes-i-ii
sunset requires notice
whether on fire, windswept, clouds that darken early,
sunset requires payment
evening rituals, meals, entertainment,
the goddess of night demands her due
in order to keep moving on
many solitary hours left till dawn
sunrise requires notice
whether anticipation, dread, breathless un-named fear,
sunrise requires payment
daily rituals, work, remorseful thoughts,
the exchange of anxieties demand its due
in order to keep moving on
Viewers may question my taking time to develop this post when a Google search, using the above title, shows about 22 million listings recorded in 0.96 of second! The answer is that I located a board article with a few interesting insights, relating to for-profit boards, that also can be useful to the selection of nonprofit directors. * Following are some of the unusual ideas.
- Select For Job Background: Nonprofit boards do look for a diversity of backgrounds—physicians, attorneys, ministers, etc. But they also need to address more specific needs. Example: One board I counseled decided it needed a director who has a marketing background, the nonprofit’s funding was significantly dependent on two major events for over 50% of its annual donations. Therefore probing the issue further, it was agreed to look for a marketing person who had event planning experiences. A marketer with an advertising background would not be as helpful as an event planner.
- Select By Focusing On The Business Model: The key to understanding the business model is the ability to understand the financial statements. Just recruiting an accountant does not fill the bill. While every board nenbner needs to be able to evaluate monthly or quarterly statements, there should be at least one person on the board who has a strong familiarity with fund accounting, the financial language of nonprofits
- Select The Growth Stage: Obviously, nonprofit startups need a group of board members who can assume responsibility for efforts that later will be taken over by paid staff. But every startup needs at least one visionary director who makes certain the nonprofit changes with milestones, usually marked by revenue and/or staff increases. Otherwise progress is impeded or opportunities missed. Board agendas, in these situations, become loaded with operational issues and strategy opportunities are ignored. Management and staff remain highly dependent on board approvals. Unfortunately, some CEOs like this arrangement because, when something goes wrong, they can claim: The board told me to do it.
- Select For Same/Similar Missions: Most board members work different areas from the nonprofit’s mission area. As a result, one or two directors should have backgrounds in allied fields. Example: A nonprofit dedicated to solving heart problems might have an executive director or development director from a cancer nonprofit serving as a aboard member.
- Select For Courage of Conviction—What’s Best for the Nonprofit: Board members who will consistently vote, in their judgements, what is best interests of the nonprofit and its mission. I have observed too many who vote to get along with board colleagues, the board chair or CEO.
Over decades of experiences as a nonprofit board member and consultant, I have encountered directors who have abandoned their convictions and have taken the easy road by.
- Selecting board chairs on the bases on their personalities and personal appearances.
- Engaging a weak local CEO to avoid moving expenses.
- Acting as a “rubber-stamp” to avoid unpleasant board discussions.
- Allowing a CEO to maintain the status quo instead of innovating.
- Failing to react to small “red flag” situations generated by management or staff.
Nonprofit boards have difficulty in bringing about change when:
- Recruitment is continually constrained to friends, colleagues and relatives.
- Most on the board are not conversant with fund accounting.
- Organization and board processes are not in line with revenue and staff growth.
- Board and management fail to look well beyond their similar peers for new ideas to serve clients.
-
Board members continually fail to state their convictions and “go along to get along. “
-
http://www.forbes.com/sites/bryanstolle/2014/06/19/what-makes-a-great-board-member-you-really-need-to-get-this-right/#226c1c5468aa
Moving from athletics to entrepreneurship has taught our guest expert important lessons about dedication and discipline. Whether training for a marathon or building a business, success demands consistent effort and focus.
In entrepreneurship, like in sports, achieving greatness requires sacrificing immediate gratification for future success. While fun activities are tempting, it’s the disciplined pursuit of important tasks that leads to real achievement. Just as athletes train hard to excel, entrepreneurs must diligently work on essential goals to thrive. True satisfaction comes from staying focused on what truly matters, even when it’s not always easy.
From Fear to Fire: Secrets to Overcome Fear, Embrace your Gifts and Achieve SuccessThis is the place where real people share real challenges. Where you can find a common bond and uncommon wisdom through their stories. Use tips from the breakthroughs of others to jump start your success. Speaker, author, adventurer, and host Heather Hansen O’Neill takes you on the journey from fear to fire. Today we talk about an athlete’s mindset journey to entrepreneurship.
Melissa CarsonMelissa Rider Carson combines her extensive experience in HR leadership with the discipline and resilience of an endurance athlete to guide leaders toward creating impactful and thriving workplace cultures. With over 25 years in the field, she has led teams to success and lived the principles of dedication and strategic planning through her achievements in marathons, triathlons, endurance races and professional endeavors.
Her athletic journey deeply influences her approach to leadership and organizational development, emphasizing balance, perseverance, and the pursuit of excellence. Melissa’s unique blend of professional expertise and personal dedication offers a fresh perspective on overcoming challenges and achieving long-term success, making her an invaluable partner to leaders aiming for growth and meaningful impact.
In addition to being the CEO of Canopy Strategies, she is the published author of two books: A Perfect Life is Not the Goal: A Practical Guide to Loving the Life You Are Living and There is No Such Thing as a Perfect Job: A Practical Guide to Loving Your Work Life. She is also active in several professional organizations, including co-leading a committee for the Philadelphia Society of People and Strategy
Connect with Melissa:Free Resource for YOU: Reflections for Success
Website: Canopy Strategies
Social Accounts:
LinkedIn: Melissa Rider Carson
LinkedIn: Canopy Strategies
Instagram: Melissa Rider Carson
Facebook: Melissa at Canopy Strategies
Quote of the Day:“The mind is absolutely instrumental in achieving results, even for athletes.
Sports psychology is extremely important when you’re winning and losing races by hundredths and even thousandths of a second.” ~Michael Johnson
The workday on the farm was hard, backbreaking, and exhausting.
Everyone worked and had tasks that they were responsible for and had to do every day except Sunday.
Sundays were special and was our day of rest and worship. We all took baths Saturday night while mom ironed my white shirt, my Sunday blue jeans, a dark blue denim pair that I only wore on Sundays for church.
I loved the sanctuary; it was breathtaking with stained glass windows. The pews were polished and shiny. I loved to sing hymns and gospel songs.
I always close my eyes when the preacher prayed, but I said my own prayers hoping the crops would grow good and the rain would come to our fields.
It was a good place to grow and the farm gave us so much. I learned about kindness and helping others and how hard work made us stronger.
It was a time of great responsibility, and often hardships, yet it was a good life, built on hard work, family, friendship, and church on Sundays.
Our mindset is the cornerstone of well-being. In this week’s Mindful Moment, let’s turn our attention inward and explore our thoughts. Ask yourself:
- Are my thoughts directed towards myself gentle, loving, and compassionate?
- Am I prone to judgment and criticism, both towards myself and others?
- Are my overall thoughts predominantly positive or veering towards negativity?
- Do I infuse my thoughts with gratitude and appreciation regularly?
Positive Thoughts: A Conscious ChoicePositive thoughts are not merely a byproduct but a conscious choice. Let’s break free from negative tape loops and cultivate a mindset that uplifts us and those around us.
Nurture Your Mental Health with Love and RespectYour mind deserves the same love and attention you give your body. Reflect on the questions above with curiosity and non-judgment. Your mental health is as crucial as your physical well-being.
As someone who has dedicated the last two decades to practicing and mentoring in this field, I’ve developed a proprietary coaching methodology that transforms lives by enhancing mindset. If you find yourself in need of assistance, ready to have an expert guide you with research-based tools and techniques to rewire your brain, take the first step.
Invest in your mental well-being; it’s the key to unlocking your fullest potential. I look forward to connecting with you.
In this episode, Angela and Dana discuss the importance of authenticity and being true to yourself. They share their personal experiences with addiction and the journey to sobriety as well as emphasize the need to address the root causes of addiction and the benefits of self-work. The conversation also touches on the role of faith in overcoming challenges and the impact of doubt from loved ones. They highlight the value of genuine friendship and having faith in yourself. The episode concludes with a reminder to have faith in yourself and surround yourself with supportive people.
And as always, true to form, Dana and Angela crack jokes, make merry, and embrace their potty mouths as they drop all pretenses and go commando!
Commando Nugs:
• Being authentic and true to yourself are important in personal and professional growth.
• Addressing the root causes of addiction and engaging in self-work are crucial for recovery.
• Having faith in yourself and surrounding yourself with supportive friends is essential.
• Doubt from loved ones can strain relationships, but having faith in oneself is paramount.
Do you ever feel the Necessity to Break Free?
To travel into an Uncharted Territory,
where not so many Humans exist,
to take away your walk with Faith?
All you need is a little Space, a little Peace.
To find Solace that has been stripped away
due to the bombardment of ads and questions
and realities each and every day.
Don’t let them take your spirit away.
Always find a Corner of the Universe
where you can retrieve that special part of your Soul
to bring you back to your Everlasting Whole.
God never intended for us to be owned by others!
God never intended to put up barriers!
God never intended for us to judge people
by the color of their skin or their place of origin!
We all were born in the place we were born,
but that doesn’t say we have to stay.
Roam, my friend, until you find your Soul.
Travel my friend, until you find your whole.
Trust your gut to always believe,
and God will never, ever leave.
Creativity and inspiration is definitely enlightened by William Wordsworth’s poems. When sometimes not in an overly positive mood and in need of moment of gentle reflection, flowers do brighten a day and may prompt a smile.
Daffodils are happy flowers and together in large numbers really do make the heart sing.
Wordsworth’s description almost makes reading it a physical experience, offering meditation, quietness and joy to those who sense a level of synergy with his descriptions of Nature and life itself.
‘I wondered lonely as a cloud’ is one of my favourite poems.
The scene comes to life in the mind’s eye. Daffodils and their reflections, on the surface of a lake. Their heads swaying side by side.
William Wordsworth 1770 – 1850.
Selected words from the poem ‘I wondered lonely as a cloud’
(Composed 1804. Published 1807)
The final verse:
-o-
For oft, when on my couch I lieIn vacant an in pensive mood,They flash upon the inward eyeWhich is the bliss of solitude;But my heart with pleasure fillsAnd dances with the daffodils.
-o-
Wordsworth had to describe his experience in a poem. He was there. He witnessed such joy. The complete poem frees the spirit ‘…….floating high over vales an hills’. Reading the complete poem will free the senses and experience scene; ‘beside the lake, beneath the trees hovering and dancing in the breeze’.
Read the complete poem and close eyes.
Any fans of Wordsworth out there?
Some days, you need to remind yourself about what’s truly important in life. So sit back with a cup of your favorite beverage and give yourself a few minutes to savor this sweet video, which gives you a prescription for happiness in two minutes, starting with “show up.”
Someone just asked me a question that I love being asked …
What’s the difference between your brain and your mind?
And while there is a complex and nuanced answer to this question, there’s also a fundamental one. Watch this quick video to hear my response … especially since knowing the difference influences how you create a better future.
Hugs,
AmyK
The azaleas are getting buds of red, white and some seem almost pink. Working in the garden, digging in the soil, raking out the leaves and weeding the intrusion weeds.
The garden gives me a sense of doing something that has healing properties.
I watched the birds as they scratch the new soil finding worms and insects. Time seems to slow down when I am in the garden.
Perhaps the calming work done in the garden does relax us with feelings of contentment and wellbeing.
The midday sun chases me from the garden where I sit in the shade of an ancient oak tree drinking sweet tea and reflecting on the morning s work.
Soon spring will gift me with flowers of all colors and reward my digging in the soil with breathtaking beauty.
Dearest hearts there are no words we can offer that will make endings feel good because endings often feel as though you’ve failed. However, if you stop focusing on what has ended and place your attention on what’s been gained, you’ll gift to yourselves an easier transition from ending to beginning.
If you’re able to see a new awareness, then you’ve successfully completed the situation
Begin by reclassifying endings. Instead of declaring, “This relationship, situation, way of being has ended and therefore I have failed.” Say instead, “Even though this has ended, I have grown because of the experience.” Now take a moment to remember yourself as you were and compare it to how you are now. Take a moment to appreciate all that you have learned, gained, and recognized about yourself and your approach to life. If you’re able to see a new awareness, then you’ve successfully completed the situation.
Stop measuring your progress by the number of mistakes made and begin understanding that getting it wrong is often a necessary part of getting it right
Being aware doesn’t mean you handled the situation perfectly all of the time. You may have been manipulated, tricked, or agreed to do something that wasn’t in alignment with your highest good, let it go. Stop measuring your progress by the number of mistakes made and begin understanding that getting it wrong is often a necessary part of getting it right. Growth is never about always moving in an upward trajectory. Growth happens when you’re willing to expand, honor, and offer to yourself the possibility of becoming more.
A negative, painful pattern repeating is not an indicator that you should have known better, it’s a request for help. Your psyche is asking you to get help to break out of this toxic behavior
Some of you may be saying, “I didn’t progress at all. This situation took me backward. I knew better but I still got used.” To that statement, we say, “If you had truly known better you would have done better.” Therefore, a negative, painful pattern repeating is not an indicator that you should have known better, it’s a request for help. Your psyche is asking you to get help to break out of this toxic behavior. The growth you achieved, in this case, is not to have overcome a former debilitating pattern but rather to become aware that that pattern exists and is causing unnecessary hardship. Awareness is the first point of change. Therefore, your growth from this situation is your newfound ability to see and understand there’s a problem.
If you insist you’ve failed when you repeated a toxic cycle then you’ve just made it harder to break free
If you allow yourself to win by recognizing your growth, you’ll make it easier to continue winning. If you insist you’ve failed when you repeated a toxic cycle then you’ve just made it harder to break free. By seeing yourself as a failure, you’re condemning yourself to the failure space. You’re invoking the law of attraction to bring you more reasons to feel bad, call yourself a failure, and face painful endings. At the same time, you’ve made it impossible to accept bright beginnings.
You are the deciding factor during every part of your life. If at any time you want to change the circumstances you’re experiencing you must begin by changing the internal dialogue, the emotional resonance, and your willingness to be in alignment with your Divine source.
To begin something with hope for the future, you much believe it’s possible for things to improve, you must see yourself as worthy of deserving good things, and you much allow yourself to receive the support you need to succeed. If you’re committed to seeing yourself as a failure, you’ll make sure to self-sabotage until that vision becomes your reality. You are the deciding factor during every part of your life. If at any time you want to change the circumstances you’re experiencing you must begin by changing the internal dialogue, the emotional resonance, and your willingness to be in alignment with your Divine source. Anything is possible but you must be in energetic agreement with it before it can become part of your awareness.
It’s inevitable that things will end, whether those endings become doorways to new opportunities is up to you
This means you’re the determining factor. It’s not other people or what’s happened to you that decides the outcome, it’s how you choose to interact with what is that matters. It’s inevitable that things will end, whether those endings become doorways to new opportunities is up to you. An ending says, “This is complete.” It does not say, “You are a failure.” You decide whether complete means you’re ready for something new and you’re proud of all that you’ve learned or whether you say, “I failed again, maybe it’s time to stop trying.”
Recognize it’s your energetic contribution that makes a difference
A new beginning is available at the start of each day. It comes as a blank slate waiting for you to decide how you want to influence it. Conversely, the end of every day does not have to include pain, worry, fear, or anxiety. Recognize it’s your energetic contribution that makes a difference. If you want a bright beginning honor yourself by looking for what’s right and focusing on everything that brings you joy. If you want a painful ending that will make you feel like a failure refuse to see how much you’ve grown and how worthy you are of receiving.
Allow yourself to learn from your experiences, to recognize what you’ve done well and what you’d like to change
There’s no outside force, nothing is out to get you, and there’s no reason to fear you’re a failure. Endings can be painful, life can hurt but the pain is not meant to destroy you. Allow yourself to learn from your experiences, to recognize what you’ve done well and what you’d like to change. Once you recognize you have completed but not failed, you’ll be able to open to new possibilities and bright beginnings.
Efficiency and cost-effectiveness are key to staying competitive in today’s fast-paced business environment. This is where smart contracts come into play. As a revolutionary technology built on blockchain, smart contracts are transforming how businesses operate by automating processes, reducing paperwork, and ensuring transactions are completed accurately and on time.
Let’s dive into how smart contracts are streamlining operations and cutting costs for businesses.
What are Smart Contracts?
Simply put, smart contracts are self-executing contracts with the terms of the agreement directly written into code. They run on blockchain technology, which means they are decentralized and secure. When predetermined conditions are met, the contract automatically enforces and executes the terms. This automation eliminates the need for intermediaries, thereby reducing time and costs.
Reducing Operational Costs
One of the most significant benefits of smart contracts is their ability to cut operational costs. Traditional contracts often involve several intermediaries like lawyers, bankers, and brokers, each adding layers of complexity and cost.
Smart contracts automate these processes, removing the need for these middlemen. This streamlines operations and drastically reduces the costs associated with contract management and execution.
Enhancing Accuracy and Speed
Human error is a common issue in traditional contract execution. Smart contracts mitigate this by encoding the terms and ensuring they are executed exactly as intended once the agreed conditions are met.
This precision, combined with the speed of automation, means transactions and agreements can be completed much faster than traditional methods.
Improving Transparency and Trust
As you probably already know, if you’re staying informed on all things crypto and blockchain using bitcoin news sites, blockchain technology (the backbone of smart contracts) provides an immutable ledger of transactions. Transparency of this degree means every party involved can view the contract and its execution history, ensuring trust and accountability in business dealings.
This level of transparency is particularly beneficial in partnerships or collaborations where trust is paramount.
Applications in Various Industries
Smart contracts have applications across numerous industries. In supply chain management, they can track the production, shipment, and receipt of products, automatically releasing payments upon delivery confirmation.
In real estate, they can simplify property sales by automating the exchange of deeds and funds. In finance, they can execute trades and automate settlements, reducing the time and cost of transactions.
Challenges and Considerations
While smart contracts offer many benefits, there are challenges to consider. The quality of a smart contract depends heavily on the initial coding. Errors in the code can lead to disputes or unintended consequences. Additionally, the legal status of smart contracts varies by jurisdiction, and businesses need to navigate these legal waters carefully.
Moreover, transitioning to smart contracts requires a certain level of technical expertise and infrastructure, which can be a hurdle for some businesses. However, as technology becomes more accessible and user-friendly, these barriers are gradually lowering.
Looking Ahead
As we move forward, the role of smart contracts in business is set to grow. They offer a reliable, efficient, and cost-effective way of conducting business transactions. Investing in this technology could be a wise move for businesses looking to stay ahead of the curve.
It’s not just about keeping up with technological advancements but also about embracing tools that can significantly enhance operational efficiency and reduce costs.
In conclusion, smart contracts are more than just a technological novelty; they are a practical solution for modern business challenges. By automating processes, reducing costs, and ensuring accuracy and transparency, smart contracts are set to revolutionize the way we conduct business.
As with any emerging technology, there are challenges to navigate, but the potential benefits make smart contracts exciting for businesses across various sectors.
Sitting,
listening,
a word bubbles,
pops–
“beloved.”
Many have washed over me
as I listened to the guide;
all have floated away now
but this.
Night rain has spent its
hoarded coin to the last minim,
fog parts, burns into blue,
earth exhales the excess of mist,
flowers unfurl their faces to the sun,
roots strike deeper into soil,
mountain ash get gloriously drunk,
braid daylight with emeralds.*
Summer’s gifts unfold, all of us
gathering on the shore of morning
to harvest and heap them on the day’s doorstep–
rainbows culled from the hummingbird’s wings,
raspberry rubies my darling plumped on our breakfast,
chortles and trills spilling from the mockingbird
who’s been in training for the past week,
Liberation Day and the school bands’ lively outbursts,
blue saturating the sky like ink on cotton–
so many jewels sparkling in the sand.
Floods have begun, scouring me of darkness,
filling me with liquid light while
“Beloved”
drums in my ears as if spoken,
ignites my soles to leap, soar and prance,
presses my throat to explode into song,
nothing to be left of me but shreds of
prismatic silk adrift on the velvet breeze.
"Remember, people respect the wise, who have the courage to live with integrity at all levels." ...
"Write from your authentic voice. Everyone has a different style and a different message. It’s like as we refine our sense of self, we shine a lighthouse beam into the world. " ...
"The day ended softly, as leaves crisply lay to rest upon the earth, and children nestled to sleep in their beds." ...
"Arrogance is actually having excessive pride over one’s or a particular group’s accomplishment to an extent wherein we believe that our abilities are superior compared to others and that success would have come sooner if we had done it alone." ...
"The media can play a critical role in healing and reducing stress for people who care about issues that affect their lives." ...
To see the flight of the Snowy egret this Late summer morning. Gifted this abundance ...
Beauty,
"New research shows that fidgeting, long dismissed as a bad habit, may help you maintain a healthy weight, lower stress, and potentially even extend your life." ...
"We can’t allow ourselves to be distracted by the fact that the leader of a once proud and prosperous constitutional republic violated the most fundamental liberty in that republic’s constitution." ...
"Tree leaves wave goodbye in the breeze presenting the most awesome colors. Truly amazing. The most colorful time of year." ...
"Future walks in paradise, Magic thoughts, celebrate Nature. Who can ask for more?" ...
"Building relationships and networking are essential for branding and business success, as people tend to invest in individuals they know and like." ...
Physics is poetry Chemistry is an intriguing symmetry One deals with quantity While others with amazing quality ...
"Quantum technologies use the unique characterizations of sub-atomic particles to process data inputs and will likely revolutionize everything from cybersecurity to real-time analytics." ...
"There is a “River of YES” ** of dreams and possibilities and imaginings and experiences of joy and love and tender messes ..."
"When we see ourselves as innocent, and not having a better way to respond until now, we can allow ourselves to recognize our own internal experience." ...
"Compared with a composition of songs where an idea comes to me instantly, this incremental approach is an interesting way to build creativity slowly rather than the instant rush of blood to the head." ...
"It’s not a choice. Not everyone who’s homeless is a drug-addict or in need of mental health care. Most are normal people who’ve been knocked down, and it can happen to you too." ...
"Intelligence, education, and theory are important. After all, those who choose to ignore history will often make the same mistakes over and over." ...
"When it comes to our reactions to COVID and the oppressive, authoritarian, and even experimental mandates that are sure to follow — this time around, the next time, or the time after that — try to remember this: We’ll make them ourselves." ...
"Bumblebees do seem to have their own individual character. On being approached to be rescued, a raised leg may indicate caution, or of course in fantasy, a wave of welcome." ...
As I slowly walk along, shuffling through the dry and crunching leaves, I spot one I shall call my own. And bending down, I gently pick it up, rescuing it from the others for fear of it being lost.
And as I hold it up close, marveling at its beauty, it slowly crumbles in front of my eyes; while a gentle breeze takes what had remained and lifts it to lofty skies. Seeing this, I feel saddened and cannot help but wonder if the same fate awaits me.
With so many leaves having fallen to the ground, this one leaf represents me, my life, amongst all the other children of this world. Will anyone find me and hold me as I have held this leaf? Is there anyone interested in my story or my demise?
Would there be anyone who would miss me? Or even notice my absence. Should the wind take me away? Will anyone care if I am no longer there?
Oh, that my prayer might be answered, and just one kind soul finds me beautiful and cares for me as I’ve cared for this lovely leaf.
One Child Matters
I‘ve joined our local YMCA. I’ve joined because my physio is getting frustrated with me and he’s a really nice guy trying to do the right thing and I don’t want to let him or myself down.
I had an operation to repair a torn Achilles tendon last year and whilst the operation was a success, my rehab is proving difficult and that’s because I don’t do the work that I need to. But I do want to fully recover and I do want to be able to wear high heels again and I simply cannot face turning up and bullsh*tting my physio anymore.
So, I joined the YMCA because it has a gym and strengthening classes and I like the welcoming, easygoing vibe there, as well as the great cafe, vast array of activities, and fab value for money – but most of all I like the people who remembered my name from the first day I turned up and make me feel seen and wanted.
And after I joined, I noticed that in addition to all of the sport-based classes, there were also community-based classes and one of those was ballroom dancing.
Now, many years ago, when I was a very young child maybe 7/8 years old, I used to go to ballroom dancing lessons every week with one of my older sisters and I remember really liking them because I got to spend time with my sister and the teacher said we were good. So, I signed up and persuaded my sister to come along with me, so we could re-live those precious times in spite of the passing of years.
And yesterday was our first class.
And we loved it.
We learnt the basic steps to the ‘cha cha cha’ along with a little ‘New York’ move as it’s known in the trade and we got very excited about learning the whole ‘cha cha cha’ routine over the coming weeks. The class was just one hour of our time at a cost of £3, but the return on this investment was simply priceless. In fact, it was one of the most fulfilling and productive hours I think I’ve ever spent – we laughed, we learned something new and we remembered who we were before we succumbed to the narrative that life imposed on us.
And the point of this post is to say that we will always have to face challenges in life, very often unfair, random, and wounding, but that does not mean we need to be defined by them.
We can always choose to return to a more genuine state, to remind ourselves of who we really are, to re-visit what brings us genuine joy and therefore freedom. And it does not matter if we can only do this for a short while, because it is not the duration or even frequency that matters, it is the awareness that we have this ability, this choice, that no matter what life dictates, our minds belong to us and us alone and no matter how rough the storm is, we will always enjoy the calm of the sunshine, as long as we know where to find it.
And that is what ballroom dancing gave to me and my sister yesterday – our very own sunshine.
So, please have a think about your ‘ballroom dancing’ equivalent and do it, just as soon as you can.
With love
Nik x
Last Saturday thousands came together in DC to pay homage to the March on Washington which took place 60 years ago, the march where Dr. King spoke of that unforgettable dream. This commemoration was a powerful stand against the threat to Dr. King’s dream – the vision of a united nation prevailing over hatred and bigotry. Even though I wasn’t physically there, the significance of the event and its message hit home.
There’s this incredible clip I stumbled upon by one of the speakers – Sacha Baron Cohen, yep, the man behind “Borat.” While he’s known to make us laugh, his words in this clip really made me pause. His message is clear: hate and lies are conscious choices we make, while unity and solidarity are the tools we can use to push back against these destructive forces.
In a time when misinformation and division are prevalent in our lives, the call to action couldn’t be clearer. We’ve got to actively choose unity over division and truth over lies.
It’s about standing together, strong in purpose and resolve, and filling in the gaps that falsehoods try to create.
Take a moment to check out this short but powerful clip that really resonated with me: Sacha Baron Cohen’s Remarks at the 60th Anniversary of March on Washington. Forgive the very short ad – I did not know how to clip it out. You can skip it after a few seconds.
It’s a call to action, a reminder that we each possess the ability to champion truth and empathy. Let’s choose to lead others toward a future where Dr. King’s dreams are more than just words – they’re living realities.
Music is one of those careers that is viewed by many as not “a real job.” However, for the creative who has a passion for music and brings the element of a message related to life to the listener, music is indeed a valuable career.
Meet Bruce Coughlan, a lifelong musician who picked up a guitar at age 14 and never looked back. He is a career songwriter and recording artist residing in British Columbia with over four decades in the music industry. Bruce is a storyteller, with timeless messages and a flair for intrigue and mystery. His newest release, Waiting for Rain, is soulful Retro-esque Roots, Rhythm & Blues music. He has many accolades, most recently having won the Bronze International Male Emerging Artist 2023 ISSA award.
In this interview, Bruce shares his beginnings, how he has stayed in music as a career, and sage advice for others in the industry.
Eileen: You are a career performer, having been in the Music Industry for over four decades. That is a long time! What got you started, at what age, and what has kept your interest?
Bruce: I suppose I’ve always known. I can’t remember a time in my life when Music wasn’t a motivating factor. By my fourteenth summer, I was busking full-time on Vancouver’s Granville Street, while haunting all the “Hippy Havens” of the day: Wreck Beach, Kitsilano & Gastown, where song circles, and drum circles were commonplace, and Folk Clubs of the day were a valuable learning ground for a fledgling Roots artist.
Eileen: You play an array of Roots music genres. This is a unique path to take, please share the moment you knew this is what you wanted to focus on and how it has formed who you are as a musician.
Bruce: When I was six years old, my father took me to the Queen Elizabeth Theatre to see the Irish Folk group Clancy Brothers and Tommy Makem. They bounded onto the stage, and from five rows back my world was forever changed. In a heartbeat, I knew how I was to spend my life; as a balladeer.
The Clancy Brothers & Tommy performed a spell-binding set of song and story. After the show, I was allowed backstage to meet them. Somehow, I’ve never outgrown that wide-eyed enthusiasm.
Eileen: You play at festivals, concerts, arts presentations, community and corporate events. What is your favorite, if you have one, and why?
Bruce: I like festivals because I get to enjoy the music and the comradery of my own kind. Kindred spirits. I enjoy engaging other performers away from the lights and sound. I’ve made so many friends at after-parties and side sessions.
From a strictly performance standpoint, I love a concert setting. In the absence of life’s distractions, a concert setting allows a story-telling songwriter to engage the audience on a very personal level. Watching the response of people painting pictures in their own mind’s eye, based on their own experiences, is possibly the most rewarding aspect of what I do.
Eileen: You have recorded 100’s of songs and recorded 15 albums. That is quite an achievement! What has kept you motivated to keep writing, recording, performing, and being a lifelong musician?
Bruce: It’s the process itself that keeps me motivated artistically. For me, it’s become a cycle of discovery, analysis, engagement, immersion & expression. I discover a style or genre of music, I break it down into components of content, structure, and nuance. I then engage practitioners of that style or genre. Once I have immersed myself sufficiently in music and its culture, I endeavor to find my own voice within those constructs. I strive always to express myself in an authentic manner. If you hear me sing the Blues, it’s because I’ve lived them and because it comes from the heart.
Eileen: Everyone has a story about their life’s journey. What is the most memorable part of your music journey to date and why?
Bruce: So many memorable legs to my journey. The term “Life’s Rich Pageantry” comes to mind. I set off at fourteen with a guitar to take on life as a balladeer. It’s been nearly a half-century and life is still an adventure novel, and every song is a new chapter.
Eileen: There are lessons learned to grow both personally and professionally. What has been the most profound lesson that has taught you to keep going forward and do what you love to do?
Bruce: A life in music can be a humbling experience. You first must realize that the true power of music is not in its ability to generate revenue.
The true value of music stretches far beyond rhythm and melody, it expresses elements of culture and identity.
No other art form can truly express the depth and breadth of the human experience. For music to be authentic and true, it cannot be about ego. Music has the potential to unite.
Eileen: Have you had any mentors along the way of your long music career? What has been their best advice that has enabled you to be successful?
Bruce: I’ve had many mentors (whether they realized it or not) and so many teachers (so to speak). Having never been a studied musician, everything I know, I’ve learned from observing and engaging other musicians. The best advice I’ve received has been the product of observation. Those who are meaningfully, productively, and remarkedly engaged in a life of music are those for whom life is art.
Eileen: If you are not writing songs, recording or performing what do you like to do, any hobbies?
Bruce: I like to explore, geographically and culturally. I like history, which allows us to view culture with a deeper understanding. I always find inspiration in discovery.
Eileen: Words of advice for life, up-and-coming artists, and what to focus on for fulfillment, joy, and happiness.
Bruce: Music is the toughest way to make an easy living, especially these days with music being so monetarily undervalued. It takes a lot of work, and it takes a team. The process itself can be daunting, but the rewards can be immeasurable. Music is a noble craft and a timeless one.
Editor’s Note: Visit Bruce’s Website Here
We’ve all experienced our own highs and lows through life. I wrote this song as a reminder that all of it helps shape who we are. We should try to embrace all aspects of our journey. “So go laugh, live and love, give and grow, all the above. Make the most of this time in your life.”
Workplace psychology researcher, Stefan Falk, wrote an article for CNBC, in which he’d like you to know that in his more than 30 years of studying workplace cultures, he’s discovered five toxic phrases selfish and entitled individuals always use. If he came up with only five, that suggests 30-plus years may not have been quite enough.
Be that as it may, here are the offending phrases Stefan’s in-depth studies have revealed:
- “This feedback is insulting.” [Translation: Some people may be interested in the truth. I’m not one of them.]
- “My ideas are valuable and always merit serious consideration.” [Translation: You’ve clearly failed to recognize my intellectual superiority.]
- “Their success comes at the expense of my own.” [Translation: You’ve weaponized merit and objectivity and used them against me.]
- “Why are you always trying to control me?” [Translation: There’s no i in team. But if you add an e, there’s eat me.]
- “You’re being disrespectful by not agreeing with me.” [Translation: I’m not responsible for your failure to recognize my genius.]
With a few more minutes of research, Stefan might have been able to abbreviate his article from 538 words to these nine: “Bureaucracies are Petri dishes for narcissism and self-serving politics.” But he didn’t. So, here are the top ten phrases (sentences, actually) selfish and entitled individuals use that Stefan might have heard if he’d stuck around a little longer. You can decide for yourself if they’re toxic — or if you should just tell the selfish and entitled individual in question to take a long walk off a short pier:
- “What’s in it for me?”
- “That’s a great idea, Herb. I’m glad I thought of it.”
- “The only person I care about, other than me, of course, is the one on the rung above me on the ladder.”
- “I came in late. So, I’m going to leave early to make up for it.”
- “There’s no limit to what you can accomplish around here, as long as you always tell me I’m right.”
- “You probably think you can’t get your nose any farther up my ass. But that’s only because you’re not trying hard enough.”
- “If you don’t think I’m the smartest person in the room, you’re in the wrong room.”
- “I’m not paying you to think. I’m paying you to say, ‘Yes.’”
- “I may not always be right. But I’m never wrong.”
- “Not for nothin’, but when HR found me, they quit hiring.”
The Man Behind the CurtainIn my last corporate gig, there was a guy as self-important as anyone I’ve ever met. We’ll call him Tony because his name was Tony. He was the last person of whom I’m aware who actually got a gold watch for 25 years of service to the company. He wasn’t an officer of the company, but he walked around, talked, and acted, as if he owned the joint.
His chief responsibilities were two: (1) He was responsible for the fleet of cars the company leased for its salespeople. (That ought to give you an idea of how long ago it was.) (2) He was responsible for commission payments to the salespeople. As a result, Tony produced enough reports every month, using enough paper to fell a forest every month, to bury the building — which was 24 or 34 stories, depending on what accounts you read — but listed as 527 feet tall in either case (?!).
Shortly after his 25th anniversary with the company, Tony was greased (staff-adjusted as the euphemists put it). His responsibilities were turned over to one of my co-workers and me. We’ll call the co-worker Jeff because his name was Jeff. When we were told Tony’s responsibilities were now ours, Jeff and I soiled ourselves. After regaining our composure and changing our shorts, we waded into the bunker Tony had built for himself in one corner of the floor on which we worked and started digging through his files.
We found nothing except for copious evidence of the fact that Tony did next to nothing. The reports he submitted every month, aside from being arboreally criminal, were delivered to him by others: The auto reports came from the company from which the cars were leased. The commission reports came from the accounting and IT departments that calculated them. All Tony did was re-package them, make them exponentially more voluminous than they had to be, submit them, and strut around like the cock of the walk.
All that and a gold watch, too. Wow.
The Moral of the StoryPeople are seldom as important as they try to appear to be. You don’t have to think they’re important at all because they think they’re important enough for both of you.
When you encounter such folks, repeat after me: “Take a long walk off a short pier.”
Do you smile when butterflies visit your senses? The fluttering of the heart matches the awareness of these heavenly beings. Every movement of their wings mirrors flower petals in the breeze. Greeting each other, gentle exchange of flowers and scent. Beauty combined. Witness spiraling, wings aflutter, elevating upwards in harmony; wonder how such joy be seen.?
They dance parading a wealth of dreams to those who seek such freedom. Flying, hovering, seeking flowers to choose, so fussy they be. Awestruck; dream of flying, enjoying the company of beautiful beings. And there you flutter side by side. A dream come true, happiness limitless.
And so you awaken, memories vivid, fantasy or reality? The heart remembers views vividly, from the sky. Ground below, gentle landing. Eyes open, a sight surreal, a butterfly flying past from where you ponder. So familiar, a friend departing?
Butterflies: Angels of Nature, bless the heart, a smile of wonder, joy supreme.
I was switching channels when I heard a woman say, “Food is the only thing that makes me happy.” I stopped and watched a 900-pound, bedridden woman shovel a huge piece of cake into her mouth. That made me stop and think, what is happiness?
Many people don’t understand that emotional health creates physical and mental reality. When we fail to focus on healing ourselves, we can look for happiness in all the wrong places. Some people escape by turning to drugs, alcohol, or sex, while others find control and relief in food.
Our bodies are magical energy that absorbs how we handle our emotional well-being, affecting our mind, body, and spirit. Stress, anxiety, physical, mental, and sexual abuse can cause excess adrenaline and other problems, leading to heart palpitations, lack of sleep, digestive problems, breathing difficulties, and, over time, various illnesses and diseases.
The more emotionally crippled we become, the more money we spend on doctors, psychologists, psychiatrists, medications, and other health services. How we handle our emotions can make us strong and resilient despite what has happened in our past, or we can become emotionally imbalanced and slowly kill ourselves. Even life-saving food can be a killer!
I am not an expert on this topic, but I know what I’ve seen as a crime and violence prevention specialist. Obesity is an epidemic, costing $173 billion in 2019. Look at old movies from the thirties, forties, and fifties. We don’t see many overweight people. Life was less stressful; families played and worked together, neighbors knew and trusted each other, and there was less crime and violence. However, in high-crime neighborhoods, I saw obesity forty years ago, which wasn’t just about poverty but how people reacted to fear and stress by hiding behind closed doors. I saw them losing their health and safety as they lost human connections.
Many Americans don’t understand humans are spiritual beings who depend on social connections. How we emotionally react to life can kill us or keep us safe and healthy.
Everyone has anxiety and fear, but how we handle anger can determine our health. Do we escape our emotions with drugs, alcohol, or food? Do we get angry or violent and blame others? Do we become passive and blame ourselves? Or do we stay spiritually centered and work together to solve problems?
Many low-income Americans do not panic but have learned to stay calm under stress. They often focussed on family support, neighborhood, or community connections and found inner peace through prayer or mediation. They transformed depression into courage, found wisdom that transformed fear and energized their spirit with a commitment to help others. Emotional pain can be transformed into patience, calmness, and serenity, but it takes commitment, faith, and being surrounded by people who care.
Happiness is what we value and what we choose to believe.How many people will die without understanding that their health and safety depend on how they react to the world around them? What do we want for our families and future? How can we find health and safety? It all boils down to knowing that we are spiritual beings with the inner power to heal ourselves. When we focus on loving who we are, helping others, and focusing on faith in a higher power, we will discover the wisdom that can guide us to real happiness and success.
We live in a world of endless contradictions. Work vs. family. Money vs. fulfillment. Desires vs. obligations. The body vs. the spirit. We rely on conventional wisdom to point us forward. But conventional wisdom gets it wrong more often than we imagine. Open this book and celebrate the marriage between the greatest collection of verbal images in history — King Solomon’s Book of Proverbs — and the most famous visual image in the world — Leonardo Da Vinci’s Mona Lisa.
- Find tranquility in the midst of conflict
- Develop attitudes that deepen relationships
- Gain clarity through times of darkness and confusion
- Decrease cynicism and find joy in the daily miracles that fill our lives
Take a guided tour beneath the surface of the world we live in through the lens of news stories, historical vignettes, folktales, the wonders of nature, and the discoveries of science — all woven together in a lyrical and surprising medley of the human experience.
Researchers have no explanation why people, when blindfolded, can’t walk a straight line; but what is it about human nature that makes us wander in circles? What does former NYC Mayor Bloomberg’s plan to ease Manhattan traffic with “congestion pricing” reveal about the way we make decisions? What can fig harvesting, migraine headaches, and two Miss America titleholders teach us about the underpinnings of emotional well-being?
The answers to 3000 years of questions are here, revealed for every seeker of truth and self-awareness in the language of our modern era. Guided by the wisdom of Solomon and the mysteries of the Mona Lisa, learn how to find tranquility in the midst of chaos, how to savor the moments of everyday life, and how to resolve the paradoxes of the human heart.
CLICK HERE TO ORDER YOUR PERSONAL COPY TODAY!
Now available in audiobook format as well. Click here for information.
New Rising Sun is about life, love, and accepting change. My wife and I were living in Placitas New Mexico between Santa Fe and Albuquerque when our daughter was born. We are both from “back east” and we had to make a very tough decision on whether we should try to build a life in the desert or head back closer to home. After much soul searching and deliberation, we decided that for the greater good, we would move back east to be closer to our families hence the song chorus: “I’m ready to face distant horizons and stare into space at the New Rising Sun”. The “New Rising Sun” is my way of saying we were open to accepting change and what life had to offer us. It was a pivotal moment in our lives.
What do we do when the world is on fire? I imagine you, like me, are feeling the heartbreak of recent world disasters: fires, floods, extreme heat…the many many misfortunes that have upended people’s lives around the globe this year.
The Maui fires were especially close to my heart, and I’m still reaching out to friends on the islands to see if there’s any way I can support them from afar. As I write, friends are also being evacuated from several East Washington/North Idaho towns due to fires and high winds.
Even if the weather in your part of the world is mild in comparison, you are unlikely to remain untouched by the heartbreak.
Yet every time one of these intensely challenging situations rises, we hear inspiring stories of helping hands, innovative solutions, and people rising to the occasion to be there for one another.
In Maui, a few friends are packing food containers, others are finding solutions for missing & wandering animals, and people from around the world are joining in prayer to send healing energy toward the land.
Sometimes, that’s what we can do.
I was moved to tears when I read about historic Lahaina’s banyan tree, which has become a symbol of hope for all of Maui. Many years ago, I was standing beneath this magnificent tree, feeling a deep sense of gratitude and awe, when I was suddenly flooded with such a great wash of love that I knew it was the tree returning the compliment. It was one of the most profound experiences of connection with nature I’ve ever had.
Apparently, the 150-year-old tree is in a ‘coma-like state’ but with live tissue under the singed bark. The state arborists are caring for it, expecting the tree to show signs of recovery in 3-4 months.
Amazing.
I know this news may not be comforting for those who have lost family, friends, homes, and all of their belongings. As the arborist says: ‘It’s just a tree’ and our main attention needs to go to the rebuilding of homes and lives. But the banyan tree is a symbol of hope, and the life it holds carries a message of restoration that applies beyond the natural world.
We are a species of resounding resilience.
And what fuels resilience more than anything is not just hope, but positive action. The best thing we can do when feeling hopeless or fearful is to choose one small (or big) action to move our brains into compassion.
How do we choose which act to take among the many world needs?
Let your heart choose.
Your heartbreak is Love Calling.
Your answer is exactly what the world needs.
Listen carefully. Love deeply.
Be a Light for our world.
-Sor’a
Language, even with our most precise usage, proves totally inadequate at expressing the Truth of the Absolute; for it soon becomes apparent that expressions about It are forced by their inherent limitations to remain verbal or written representations–not the original, Itself. Thus, in describing via our “A, B, C’s” (or equally valuable letters of other languages), we create a distorted view of That which is beyond definition. The finite expression (we) can never replicate the Infinite. In other words, the Absolute is a One Off, a No-Thing impossible to be copied. Despite our best diligence, we unwittingly create conceptual false idols by the desire to express our understanding of the nature of our Creator and, thereby, know the Truth of our origin. The “catch” which is inherent to the divine system is that although we can never know the Absolute, we can–through divine revelation–“Be” It. One example of an attempt to explain That which cannot be known takes the form of the following question and answer from a book entitled All There Is, by Tony Parsons:
When you say ‘just this’ [referring to the Absolute], would you call it a vibration or energy? … You could call it energy. You could call it life. All there is is life. There is no one living a life–there is life. All there is, is life apparently happening–only apparently.
In an attempt to convey “knowing” which is impossible to convey, I offer this: We, as the apparent body-mind (person), are actually a function “of” the Absolute. In an environment (realm) that is forever in flux, how do we logically believe that it’s possible to get anything lasting (the person), when even time and space are elements within the dream? They are, in fact, the stage upon which the illusion of our lives is played. Our biggest blunder is our ignorance-based assumption that we exist independent of the Creator. Such is analogous to Leonard the light bulb believing that he shines by his own power, without being connected to the electric source by which he is illumined!
That we don’t exist as persons (I am being absolutely serious) is more easily understood when we realize that the substance of the characters within nighttime dreams is only a function of Infinite Living Mind. During the dream, these conceptual characters sing, dance, and even sit around bonfires roasting marshmallows; but the Substance of them, as with us–right here and now–is only the Absolute, d-r-e-a-m-i-n-g. To that daring statement, I add the following quote from the spiritual classic entitled I Am That, by Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj:
The real does not die; the unreal never lived.
That this content may seem ludicrous or impossible to believe is understandable; but before closing your mind to it, please consider reading the following passage (number 50 of 114 sayings attributed directly to Jesus) from The Gospel of Thomas:
(1) Jesus said: “If they say to you, ‘Where have you come from?’ say to them,
‘We have come from the light, from the place where the light came into being by itself, established [itself], and appeared in their image.’
(2) If they say to you, ‘Is it you?’ say,
‘We are its children, and we are the chosen of the living Father.’
(3) If they ask you, ‘What is the evidence of your Father in you?’ say to them,
‘It is motion and rest.’”
Note: Does that sound like the description of an Infinite Movie Projector to you? God/Consciousness is FIRST, and humans (ideas that are “created in Its image and likeness“) are projected into time and space, where we (as expressed in Acts 17:28) “live and move and have our being through Him.” This correlates with teachings about the law of attraction and explains why the “image” you hold of yourself is so vitally important. Jesus expressed the same message when he said, “be it done unto you according to your faith.”
The most important question related to self-inquiry about our essential nature is this: Are we willing to let go of an apparent lesser thing (the illusory person), to Be a No-Thing beyond limitation and definition? Even if our answer is “no,” we cannot escape actually Being It.
Dare to dream (and care for one another).
With heartfelt regards,
Art
Life is something that’s full of ups and downs so you have to embrace it because that is the law of nature. As a human being, your expectation is that life should be sweet and full of good memories without pain. But the thing is that even happiness has a price and you must pay the price to get the prize.
Challenges are there to make us better and the best version of ourselves not to destroy us. It all depends on your mindset and how you see the world because when you look at the earth, there are things that happen to make you understand things about life.
All the natural disasters signify the difficult times the earth is having while the calmness of the seas and rays of the sun to bring light to the earth signifies the good times. That’s why when you want to understand why some things are happening in life you have to study nature. But everything doesn’t have to be the way it is as far as you take some actionable steps which I will explain below.
Cultivate a growth mindset: Our mindset does matter when we’re in difficult times because it is going to determine whether we will get out of the situation or not. You don’t have to look at the negative side but the positive side. That’s why we should train our minds to see things from different perspectives. When you have a closed mindset and one that isn’t willing to learn, you will miss a lot of things in life.
Difficult times are seen as learning times because each pain you experience is teaching you. But that pain is a gift because it becomes wisdom you’ve acquired through learning. As you learn from each experience you will make sure you don’t commit the same mistakes to make sure you don’t experience the same pain. The mind is something you use to achieve anything in life only when you’re ready to stretch it and bring it out of its comfort zone.
Develop focus: Developing focus is about putting your concentration on a certain goal until you achieve it. You have to avoid all kinds of distractions that come your way to disrupt you from achieving your goals. Distractions can come from family members, peer pressure, and unnecessary pleasures of life which you’ll only enjoy for a short period of time.
All these things come to you as obstacles to achieving your goals. Focus isn’t something that is easy because it deals with a lot of sacrifices. You need discipline to develop focus because you can lose motivation on the way but discipline makes you stay focused. You’re making progress each day you apply focus to your life because it makes the forces of the universe bring you your heart desires. Focused people achieve great things.
Live your values: Your values are things that guide you to make decisions in life. It is what gives you direction on where you want to go. You’ll think you’ve to go out of the norm to overcome those challenges but you’re actually putting yourself into more trouble by doing that. The more you deviate from your values the longer the journey to be successful. By living your values you become stronger to face any challenge that comes your way.
Resilience: All great things are achieved when you become resilient. No one is born a resilient person. It is the difficult times that make you resilient. All successful people are resilient people. Do you know that you need strength to sustain success? If you don’t follow these steps of resilience to develop that strength you’ll lose your ground when you become successful because you won’t be able to sustain it.
Patience: Patience is the revealer of things. It is another way of getting strength. When you lack patience you’re losing the game because each thing that happens serves a purpose. You know your strengths and weaknesses and also the character of people. You develop great character traits which you would be proud of and it will also mold you to become the best version of yourself. Which of the steps resonates with you the most during your difficult times?
I am flummoxed to envisage
How sub-atomic particles are running in this era of cutting age
Making numerous compositions of
I have no clued how it engulfs us with what presage?
Earth has only one natural satellite
Jupiter has more than seventy satellites
It enables Earth to ensure its identity and protect it as a shooting zone
Absence of it we may be devastated by heavenly bodies prone.
Mars does affect our health and athletic exposure
All planets play a significant role in our composure
I am enamored with all planets
Our Solar system enables us with such exotic essence
All are having a huge impact on us since time immemorial
It does exist after innumerable burials!
Running of sub-atomic particles and atoms at random
In the milieu, we live with humility and humiliation, a conundrum
What action the minute particles will make
How it will impact to determine our advancement and forsake
How it will navigate our pattern of behavior
How it will foil our humanist endeavor
The moment I observe the present scenario
I am engulfed with utter imbroglio
I cannot trust
People can kill their own progeny to satiate their unrestrained lust
I wonder where we are heading on
What is happening in our cerebral to make us forlorn?
Nature is truly intriguing by putting a confusing musk
Fighting against nature is an uphill task
Nature eclipses us with its inherent audacious supremacy
We humans, a product of nature too have no capacity to combat its disparity!
Across the globe, there is a huge uproar
We are observing turmoil galore
Few eccentrics are now hovering in power politics
The sheer dearth of knowledge and perseverance are ominous and prevailing
I wonder if we will observe an apocalypse
Designed by humans alone which is in prognosis!
Can we hear a call, loud and clear?
Doomsday is knocking on our ears
Are we at our brink?
Counting the moment to sink!
"Virtual meetings are more efficient for reporting operational items like compliance updates. But they lack the robust human social interactions provided by face-to-face meetings." ...
"If you’re not yet convinced that climate-change alarmism is more about politics, wealth redistribution, power, control, gullibility, and ignorance than it is about climate (it is), maybe you should read this anyway." ...
Winchester never ceases to amaze me. Each ancient building is awesome and projects a unique atmosphere.
"There is good karma in every cup of tea and shared stories of appreciation and celebration of the special people in our lives who have touched us through love and learning." ...
"What I think may happen more often than not is that we see the platform that the candidate has affirmed, see an element of the platform that we either like or dislike, and that drives our vote." ...
"In our new world, our New Reality, having a balanced, steady, inner focus, gives evolving humans a new perspective on humility which is now an important part of our spiritual life for contemplation and integration." ...
"Building relationships with customers, clients, peers, and mentors who become your advocates is something Dortha highly recommends." ...
"Can you pen a link of madness in a space of five minutes time? As I have penned this string, yes, string of pearls." ...
Gumshoe loves to speak with family and friends or even strangers when the opportunity presents itself. Back during Gumshoe’s LEO career, the audience would undoubtedly include victims, witnesses, and victims. Gumshoe knew that everyone has a story and that one can always learn something new, something interesting, and occasionally, something provocative. Different strokes for different […]
"We can’t just look away and blame the government! Freedom is about “we the people,” not just politicians. To turn America back into a robust and free nation, we must consider what freedom means." ...
"Most importantly, he reminds us all that “the knot at the end of the rope is hope.” ...
"Our simple, childlike requests are in fact the direct asking for the feeling that we want." ...
"Stories have to be told or they die, and when they die, we can't remember who we are or why we're here." ...
"The magic of stories is also in the sharing. If you wish share your story with someone or something. All that matters is you have a story." ...
"How to go with the flow without giving up or hunkering down? How to flex and bend with the newness of every twist and turn?" ...
"Could such a structure be built today? I am usually a positive person, but in this case, highly skeptical." ...
"In today's digital world, genuine human connection can feel hard to come by. We crave authentic relationships to fill the gaps left by virtual interactions." ...
Every law enforcement officer has experienced their on-duty “Haceldana”. What is a “Haceldana” you may ask? It is an Ancient Greek term meaning “a field of blood”. The story attributed to the term, “Haceldana”, is the name of a potter’s field. This potter’s field was purchased with the thirty pieces of silver that Judas threw […]
"One of the ways of showing gratitude is appreciation. Appreciation doesn't mean that you have enough but you're contented with the little you have." ...
"One day, as they were driving back from Boston after dinner with Shawna’s parents, Shawna was unusually quiet. " ...
"Is modern science finally catching up to ancient spirituality and prophecies as seen in the works Quantum Spirituality and the Celestine Prophecy?" ...
"When we allow ourselves to greet our choices from the wholeness of the mind, body, and spirit connection, we can be at peace with our choices and move through life faithfully forward." ...
"Sense-making is determined by our ability to sense, which is far beyond the activities of the brain and thinking. In many respects, it has to do with not thinking." ...
"Re-entering the river, a look of keenness and a gentle bow of the head she took to the sky as if a supersonic Concord." ...
"Peace is our priority and it is only Nature that can ensure a peaceful co-existence." ...
"Terry and Shawna had been thinking along the same lines. It was reassuring that someone they both respected was giving them the same advice." ...
"Nature's floor enables me to breathe ... My lungs inflate to get rid of an intriguing writhe ..."
"The new Third Age is about the reinvention of oneself. It’s about continuing to grow, learn, meet new people, try new things, and even discover new purpose." ...
"PETB works through hysteria, propaganda, hyperbole, fabrication, legislation, insect rescue, special events, celebrity spokespeople, protest campaigns, and other forms of bullshit to protect the world’s insect population from human ingestion and everything else." ...
"Although Nature's wildlife will be affected by human conflict, Nature's creatures are never literally 'at war' using weapons, including bombs. Humanity alone." ...
"Flexibility is an essential requirement as we age. The best example is that our forever-changing technology requires us to remain current to live fully." ...
Gumshoe has in his past posts mentioned some incidents back when he worked as a uniform “blue suiter” while patrolling the mean streets of Santa Ana, California. Santa Ana was definitively a microcosm of East LA, Compton, East LA, and the Southside of Chicago all rolled into one rip-roaring place for street cops who wanted […]
"Building trust in yourself is a process that requires self-reflection, self-awareness, and consistent effort." ...
"Terry and Shawna met him in the lounge of the Pierre Hotel where they were staying on their way back home to New England." ...
"When we rise in our level of Consciousness, we realize that all of the apparent sources of power actually subsist within the One, which is Infinite Living Mind, or God." ...
"It is not our differences that divide us. It is our inability to recognize, accept, and celebrate those differences." ...
I am conscious "I can feel the in and around ambiance Yet I am confused what is consciousness Matters in and around me make huge ruckus!" ...
"Oh, no! Last chance? What does soon mean? Will I run out of time? When? What should I get tested for?" ...
"All the above elements could in the wildest imagination represent another world. Perhaps a parallel Universe?" ...
"All of these resources can only offer guidelines for the guy or gal behind the badge with a firearm on their duty belt who sometimes are called upon to make the on-scene, split-second decisions." ...
"A healthy and growing organization is one that its employees are always learning and growing." ...
"I feel within me sky It triggers me to go high I do possess a downward pull Sometimes it becomes a subject of ridicule ..."
"What if we replaced responsible with respond-able? Our ability to respond. What would be the new skills required to be fully respond-able?" ...
"Words tumbling from otherwhere pen gliding across icy white terrain disturbing the pristine surface ..."
As a hotelier, few things are as disheartening as seeing customers leave poor reviews for your business. The more negative reviews you receive, the harder it can be for your business to be potential customers’ first choice. You might not be able to avoid all negative reviews, but you might improve your chances of more […]
"Sometimes, when leaders don't believe in what they are saying, they make it louder so it sounds more true." ...
"Through engaging stories, thought-provoking exercises, and reflective prompts, "Awaken the Power Within" encourages readers to delve deep into their own inner landscape, uncovering hidden truths, and embracing their authentic selves." ...
"A smile, inward and outward releases endorphins. A smile makes anything possible and when directed at some who returns a smile it double in power." ...
"Our children are not only pawns in this world of sex trafficking and slavery, but they are considered not important enough to change this horrible abuse by pedophiles, child molesters, and those getting rich off our children’s backs." ...
Where does Gumshoe start? Just possibly, how did Gumshoe start is the better question, gentle readers. Just a pregnant pause perhaps to ponder . . . Birth order for sure played a large part when through serendipity, Gumshoe was the firstborn and the “Big Brother” to seven younger siblings (Mike, Deloris, Dennis, Paul, Nick, Rita, […]
Sharing your business vision with others is crucial for building a strong network, attracting potential customers, and aligning your team members toward a common goal. If you make and sell California wine, for example, effective communication of your business vision creates clarity, enthusiasm, and a sense of purpose. In this article, we will explore some […]
"As I'm in the midst of my deep dive, I realize I had to learn how to let paint dry. I have to stop and take a break, because if I don't, my yellows and my blues will make green, even if that's not what I really, really want. " ...
"It’s a billion-dollar business, and the United States is the number one for sex trafficking; why? It’s where the money is." ...
"My signals of expressions are too unique, I am human, truly supreme out of my configuration and I express it by my jive!" ...
"My kindred spirit, my better half, and my best friend. I AM forever grateful to have this kind, wonderful, wise man in my life. So today, join me in this brief Byron Edgington tribute and add your accolade here too." ...
"When in doubt of what to share; presence is enough to be there. Words may sift through air of time, but once you were a friend of mine." ...
"Visakhapatnam played a crucial role in India's struggle for independence from British rule. It was a hotbed of revolutionary activities and witnessed several key events during the freedom movement." ...
"Butterflies fluttering around, greeting each other and spiraling up together exchanging looks of happiness as they descend upon a chosen bloom." ...
"The ability to laugh stands as a vital protection of sanity and a mighty form of resistance to inhumanity." ...
"He called Shawna just to say hi. But he was pretty wrecked from all the driving so. Ten minutes later he was asleep." ...
"The speed of our lives and the incessant technological development asks us to choose which world we want to create to lead the future." ...
With VoIP phones, your team can work from home and be easily reached anytime. This helps to keep communication processes running smoothly for a happy and productive workforce. These phones typically have the same physical appearance as traditional business telephones. They are also easy to manage from the cloud. Easy to Set Up Remote working […]
"Nowadays AI is making huge furor and engulfing many with its amazing expressions." ...
"To close sales, you have to do the work. The way you present yourself, the story you tell, and the way that you relate to your dream client, all play a huge role in potential conversion." ...
"Luzuko Madonci wanted to be a lion when he was a child. His friends laughed at him." ...
"Who else has been to a Weekend 3-day event with multiple presenters, each offering, “Once in a lifetime” deals on their products and services?" ...
"Living without self-judgment or constantly belittling yourself create a mindset by which you see yourself in a positive light." ...
"We are our only limiting factor. If we believe we can or can’t do something, we’re right!!!" ...
"Chances are, if your business is at all successful, you are going to confront that question." ...
"Self-Forgiveness illuminates your true purpose-opening doors to healing your past while replacing regret with gratitude." ...
"Being in our power is key if we want to impact the world around us and yet many of us have experienced the abuse of power and perhaps shy away from shining our light." ...
"Financial abuse often goes hand in hand with other forms of abuse such as emotional and physical abuse." ...
"That’s a really important question and an even more important answer. Do you know how to find out? Do you care?" ...
"When even one of you steps onto the path of least resistance and begins to understand the way of joy a pathway becomes clear for others." ...
"We're so adept at searching for stuff and ascribing models to try and make sense of creation, and sometimes we're so close, yet we forget to include the basics... numbers." ...
"I am one witness but not the only witness against intolerance, injustice, and hate ... "
"Take a deep breath and pick up a volume and read. It will take you on a journey that you will never forget." ...
"From the human perspective, we often directly or indirectly ask the following question of our family, friends, and peers: “Are you with me?” ...
"Satan is real, he is very much among us with his legions trying to take as many souls away from our creator as possible. I used to have this saying on my car till it wore off" ...
"Cyber threats are out there all around us. And they are getting more sophisticated all the time." ...
"We are all leaders – whether it’s in our homes, schools, organisations, or communites. Regardless of context, when we are leading, we are required to inspire, innovate, lead change, deliver results, and care for our people." ...
"Our oral tradition of narratives, origin stories, creation myths, and so on - up to the present time - came about because we are meaning-seeking people." ...
"God handed me a Gift with Crayons and that’s where Words began. Upside-down letters, and colorful pictures of a wonderful blend." ...
"I was a chubby, rosy-cheeked 7-year-old girl with blonde ringlets tied up with plaid bows when I learned there is a heaven." ...
My mission is for women to rise courageously – without antagonism – and accept the mandate to empower a transition to Authentic Harmony between men and women.The chess board is an equal playing field relying on players knowing the game, their expert mental grasp of the game and the rules. Can we play the game of life and business by new rules and change the game to stop the toxicity and start a robust combination of male and female attributes?
Could a change in direction be how women create those new rules, seeking to empower men to become wise men; with men utilizing positive masculinity to guide affairs in an inclusive, compassionate manner, acknowledging all contributions as valid, equivalent, and valuable?
Is the necessary change black and white – or is it full of color and texture?
Saying Goodbye to Equality and Hello to Harmony is by no means rejecting all great achievements in the sphere of women’s rights for gender equality. I celebrate and am grateful for where women are now. Is it time, however, to co-create a new landscape and language, game, and rules, on and off the pitch, for humanity’s sake as well as economic growth and security? How do we agree to move toward a future of mutually beneficial choices by leaving the map of past misfortunes?
Women know that life today for them is neither equal to men nor balanced equity. In the United Nations in December 2022, Dr Djibril Diallo reported that the marginalization and abuse of women is the most urgent issue of today’s world. Official Data quotes state that 1 in 3 women have been abused sexually or physically, and this is felt to be low and does not address emotional abuse. This may seem far away from the corporate world of DEI and the ever-present contentious harassment and toxic behavior of workplace strains between women and men. However, it is important to address the added value we can achieve together when “bad behavior” does not slow us down!
Can we truly value each other without prejudice, judgement, stereotypes or biases?
Women are half of the world’s population yet not with half the control! There are women holding political and corporate leadership positions, but the percentage is minimal and, considering the last 100 years, we are far from achieving joint custody in a mutual plan with men for the management of business and family life. Women are economically or socially reduced to ‘less than” when indeed we could shift the pace of economic development and social equity if given the co-pilot controls!
Leaders should update our financial system for women — and the world FINANCIAL TIMES APRIL 2023
Women came into a man’s world at the outset of WW2 and took on major roles that helped win the war. They decided not to leave as life returned to normal. The stage was finally set for the fight for their rights to continue. Women have fought with men who never wanted equality for much too long. The fight has been, and still is, tough and arduous. My question is – must it be so? Surely empowered women are agile, strategic, sensitive, strong, savvy in business and the keepers of family harmony? I believe women want to maintain their natural harmonic song together with men.
Women are natural relationship builders, and increasingly creating successful businesses.
Half of the world’s population – 49.59% are women – and 2.2 of the 3.9 billion are mothers.
“Every human being is some mother’s child” and only women are capable of reproducing and running businesses!
My purpose on this planet is to evolve a new human awareness on multiple levels including emotional, lifestyle, and economic levels as positive feelings and value add become an economic driver for accepting women as equal and different. Acknowledging that women have yet to gain full equality is the next step forward. The argument of women’s inequality and marginalization is undoubtedly a trigger issue for tension among male leaders and the continued fighting for human rights and justice is a constant fear and resistance for men. We have to go beyond these boundaries before all is lost.
In my current experiences across the globe, talking with men and women about progress on this topic, I have been introduced to a movement called Positive Masculinity, initiated in DRC Congo and the heartland of Africa. In the last year taking on the role as G100 Global Chair for Positive Masculinity, I’ve learned much about this male leadership promise to eliminate violence against women and girls in their communities and to boost the role and integration of business women and female professionals into economic growth. It makes good sense yet is it easy to achieve and what is the ultimate goal?
How does this movement translate to the corporate workplace of harassment cases that are occurring? How do we develop a conversation about harmony while saying goodbye to past misdemeanors and toxicity at large without feeling we are back to the battleground of fear and misunderstandings and setting policies rather than having heartfelt conversations?
I believe we have a clear opportunity now to re-start a new authentic harmony narrative for a leadership synergy where women and men lead together valuing all needs and all life requirements – economic, social, and lifestyle. When we empower all to love one another; therein achieving harmony between genders and ceasing the toxic dissonance, we add positive equity to business relationships and collaboration to produce productive results.
In LEADING OTHERS TO SUCCESS you discover you can retain your status as a leader while blending emotional integrity and business excellence, and embedding a healthy synergy and strategy flowing into performance results for exponential growth. Shifting the lens of “I’m in charge” to “we are in charge together” is not a quick-fix solution, however, it ensures a lifetime transformation for your life and business success. Let me share one of my favorite real-life long-term client quotes:
“Pauline’s ability to work with a wide range of personalities in a large, newly formed (mixed gender) team was highly effective and practical; her style is sensitive to personal issues yet highly focused on the professional excellence I desired from the team. It was especially significant for me as the Business Manager to learn how differently colleagues perceived each other and me, and how this had caused performance in the team to be ineffective. It was noticeable that the atmosphere across the whole team lightened and improved one hundred-fold; and that over a year later the change in many people is sustainable in a manner that I have not experienced with other programs. Pauline has a wealth of experience about business as well as the people and this enhances the sustainability of the result. Her skill to reach an eclectic audience always creates tangible benefits for everyone. Diane McNulty, Business Manager, Metropolitan Police, London
In our vision of Authentic Harmony, we need wise men advocating for women as valuable co-creators and women honoring men doing things their way. However, women cannot always leave men to fix everything, especially where the solution is only sourced through a female-centric lens.
I propose an aligned strategy for Authentic Harmony rather than a Battle for Equality – for women to reach their desired destination i.e., as equally valued contributors living and working on their own terms with consideration for men. Recognizing that talents vary between men and women, in all aspects of business and life, is central to men understanding that women are both a vital part of the family and community and potentially – if she chooses – an asset to the economic growth of your business and her lifestyle.
I visualize and enact a visionary reality for our clients as the possibility ahead and the story women and men need to embrace as we all travel from Equality to Harmony. In order that this can become a joyful shared destination, men and women need greater clarity to value the co-creation design. We must harness the value of natural female talents as much as, or more than, academic skills that function as authority markers often beyond a women’s reach. We need to adapt the best practices of the past and present designed by men.
Our world has changed and so must we. Can we see beyond tradition and navigate the subsequent battle? Utilizing the best of both men and women – without toxic controls, past regrets or negative pressure points – is proven to deliver performance results.
In seeking Authentic Harmony as the possibility ahead and the story we can all embrace, we are required to release the continuing battleground of women seeking equality to a more fluid, all-inclusive world of gender dynamics intelligence, where all male and female diversities recognize each other as valuable and playing their part of the synergy equation.
SYNERGY – the interaction or cooperation of two or more individuals, identities organizations, substances, or other agents to produce a combined effect greater than the sum of their separate effects.
In order that this can become a joyful shared destination, men and women need greater clarity to value the co-creation design. We must harness the value of natural female talents as much as, or more than, academic skills that function as authority markers often beyond a women’s reach. We need to adapt the best practices of the past and present designed by men.
Our world has changed and so must we. Can we see beyond tradition and navigate the subsequent battle?
As I have navigated my life, I have observed people in diverse country cultures, East and West, and researched the nuances of natural masculine and feminine characteristics. I studied discernible traits related to innate preferences in language and core behavior that align with men and women differently. My ideas were formulated from my own masculine-minded logic preferences mixed with my female maternal core; my search to understand this mix led to my active research observing body physicality, posture, neurology, and communication patterns of hundreds of client base over 30 years. This has flowed into my flagship program LEADING OTHERS TO SUCCESS.
I have mapped my observations to core reactive archetypal behavior, studying groups in various cultures and diversities. My approach is not about diversity categories other than biology. I focus on the human ‘gender dynamics’ of conversations among men and women and the impact of masculine and feminine energy. In my research, these arise in both men and women in different patterns that can build loving healthy relationships. Sadly, toxic experiences have forged disrespectful stereotypes, uncomfortable biases, and harassing environments.
My foundational work takes a significant departure from the past and present battles for gender equality. It clarifies current gender-identity confusion. I have worked across three continents with my practice, Europe, Asia, and the USA and globally online, to embed my approach to life in three simple steps to create value in every human conversation:
- know who you are – self-discovery is key to knowing your core archetype behavior
- understand how you relate in thoughts, words, and deeds to others who are different to you
- listen, tune into others, and contribute with group perspectives, with an open mind and a willing heart
Working with diverse cultures and men and women of all shapes and sizes, I guide people on how to discover natural answers to issues that might destroy equality.
The key to Authentic Harmony is to understand those who are not like you! Too many times individuals simply don’t understand that they don’t understand!
In conclusion – to arrive at AUTHENTIC HARMONY together, we must know ourselves and converse with others without prejudice or judgement, with shared values and a common purpose. This is the essential way to move from fighting for Equality to a mutually beneficial strategy for Harmony.
It takes time to assimilate these ideas maybe because we have lived in a contentious world for so long when it comes to men and women and the equality debate. I never doubt, however, when the aha moment comes, human beings will go past the assumptions and smile. This happens all the time with my clients.
My mission is to educate a foundation of awareness for men and women to bring their voices into a joyful harmonic and – most importantly – to stop violence occurring against women and girls and young boys across the world. In this, we need Positive Masculinity role models for boys and girls. I set my intention for my legacy to be to stop bullying, harassment, violence, and war. I don’t believe we can find peace without Authentic Harmony.
The equality battle has worn both sides out. It’s a complex situation yet simple consistent steps may allow women to harness their wisdom to empower men’s lives thereby empowering all women who are marginalized. It may seem contrary to current wisdom to focus only on empowering women, however, loving intentions reign supreme in my prayer book of life. With an open-minded Authentic Harmony approach, anything is possible.
A story of Authentic Harmony evolving right now… bringing gender dynamics intelligence awareness to Positive Masculinity to evolve male role models who will advocate eliminating violence against women and girls in Africa
My mission in countries where traditional cultures are deeply rooted in gender-based violence is different from my Corporate Heart International mission to support leaders to engage in a strategic transformation of people in order to produce better results. However, there are aligned tactics and conversation strategies.
In Africa, there are major shifts occurring now where male leaders have taken on the mantel of #PositiveMasculinity in 6 African Nations at the President level and are promising they will stop the violence and build up more equitable economic support. Strong female leadership is emerging in this movement and are standing beside these men who are fixing the problem for women.
For more information on this movement, connect with my team directly at www.corporateheartinternational.com
EDITOR’S NOTE: ENJOY PART 1 HERE
Olivia wasn’t at the house when they arrived.So Terry showed her around. Eventually, they ended up on the second floor, where Shawna was given her choice of bedrooms.
Then they hauled her bags up and Terry left her to unpack and have a shower.
“My Gram has gone to a shareholder meeting in Boston. She’ll be back sometime tomorrow. Come down to the pool-house when you‘re hungry and I’ll take you to dinner.”
When she came down Terry was sitting at a table beside the pool reading something on his Kindle.
She sat down beside him and looked out at the ocean. An hour later, they were sitting at a table in a restaurant called Martini’s, in downtown Plymouth. Terry was drinking a beer and Shawna was sipping a Long Island Iced Tea.
“Your house is pretty amazing. Have you lived in it all your life?”
“Yeah. When I lost my parents, Gram sold her condo in Boston and came to live with me until I left for MIT. She commuted for a while, but then we had a chat and I set up and networked her computer here to her businesses. It wasn’t long before she got to love working remotely. Gave her a chance to spend more time in the garden, which is really where her heart is.”
“She did everything I saw? I mean. It’s a showpiece.”
“Yep. She had a landscaper named Mel Thorpe, who helped her design the whole garden, but she takes care of it pretty much by herself. Gram is a very high achiever,” Terry said. “But what about you, Shawna?”
“Pretty ordinary by comparison. My mom is a public school teacher and my dad works on the docks. He’s some kind of foreman. Spends his days unloading ships. I have one brother, Shane, also a nerd. He fell in love with girl from Canada and moved to Quebec City. I got interested in computers watching him. He’s a wizard. World-class hacker, but doesn’t really take advantage of it. Just wanted to learn how to do it because he was curious. Guess I’m a lot like him in that regard.”
“So you’ve done some hacking.”
“Little bit. Just peeking though. No stealing. No sabotage.”
“How do you feel about hacking?”
“Well, it would depend on the reason.”
“How about saving the world?”
Shawna just laughed. Not too loud. But she definitely thought it was funny.
“Well, you’re gonna have to quantify that somehow, because that’s a pretty big statement.”
Terry leaned back in his chair. He took a deep breath. “Look, what we have starting in the AI world is kind of like a wild west show. It’s a free for all. Everybody’s trying to carve out the biggest slice of the pie possible. And they’re doing it with absolutely no regard for the consequences.’
“I don’t disagree. The number of people who are going to be displaced as a result of a lot of this stuff is staggering.”
“Right. And the reason this is going to happen is because governments all over the world are just sitting back and letting it happen because nobody has lit a fire underneath their butts.”
Shawna stared at Terry for several seconds. “So are you talking about hacking the government, you know, to send them a message about how vulnerable they are? And using AI to do it?”
“Not quite. When my grandfather established this trust for me. I was only about fourteen at the time, he told me that when I got older, I should use this money to do something good. Well, I’ve got fifty-four million and what I want to do is wake the government up. And if the US government wakes up the rest of them will surely follow suit…at least that’s the theory.”
“And you think we can do this, you and me?”
“Yeah, I do with a little help from some friends.”
Just then the waiter came with their dinners.
“Just think about it, Shawna. That’s all I’m asking.” Terry said.
____________________
Later that night they sat at the table beside the pool. The air was cool and salty. They started to talk. And they talked until about three in the morning.
The next afternoon, they went to the Rockland Trust Bank on Court Street and met with a lady named Gloria Rose, who was the personal banker for the Moorehouse family. She added Shawna to the payroll of Moorehouse Digital and arranged for a direct deposit to Shawna’s BankAmerica in Boston.
They then walked down the street. They walked past all kinds of shops and restaurants. The street was bustling because it was summer and filled with tourists and residents just enjoying the warm weather. As they walked Shawna noticed that Court Street had changed to Main Street. They stopped at a large, beautiful white frame house on the corner of Brewster and Main.
They climbed onto the massive front porch and Terry used a thumb-print to open the front door. Inside was a small reception area, a wide staircase and, behind the partial wall of the reception area, a large open space, held up by pillars. There were eight multi-screen workstations, all managed by people Shawna and Terry’s age.
“This is the bullpen where most of the day-to-day stuff gets done.’ Terry said. “These people are dealing with the two hundred-odd websites we maintain. There’s a green screen studio in the basement for shooting stills or making video.”
They then climbed the stairs to the second floor, which was also an open lounge area with comfortable furniture and coffee tables. There was a line of glass-walled offices along two of the outside walls. At the far end was a large counter with a couple of coffee machines, two fridges, a stove, a microwave and cupboards. A couple of people were sitting at the counter, drinking coffee and looking at something on an iPad.
A older lady, dressed in a stylish business suit walked out of the corner office. She and Terry hugged affectionately. Then Terry turned to Shawna and said. “Shawna Lennox, this is Jamie Goldman, she runs the joint.”
Shawna and Jamie shook hands.
“Welcome, Shawna.”
“Thank you. This quite the going concern you have here., How many people in all?”
“Well there’s the eight sloggers downstairs, who deal with website creation and maintenance. There’s me, up here coordinating, I have two site designers and two app designers, but they work mostly at home. And we have three sales people, who are on the road most of the time. Hence all the empty offices up here.”
“That’s quite an operation.”
“ Yeah, we try and have as much fun as we can. And keep the days contained to eight hours.”
“OK, so you and I,” Terry said to Shawna. “Will be working separately from the rest of Moorehouse Digital. Jamie has even given us our own separate server, which we can cloak.”
“So Jamie knows what you’re planning.”
“Yeah, Jamie’s part of the family. She was Gram’s executive assistant in Boston and Gram gave her this company to run after she decided to be more hands off. Jamie’s president. Gram is the CEO.”
“So what are you? I mean what are we?”
“You can call yourself anything you want. Tell Jamie and she’ll put it in your business card. Mine just says, Head of Digital Innovation. That would be a good title for you too.”
Terry showed Shawna into one of the offices. There was a large desktop monitor and keyboard on a beautiful oak desk. Terry asked Shawna to sit at the desk. He reached over and activated the monitor. A small logo came up on the screen. Displaying the words ‘The Human League’.
“This is us.” Terry said.
Shawna smiled. Terry clicked on the logo and a page of text came up.
“The Human League is dedicated to helping bring sanity to the digital future. Our mission is to create awareness, in governments around the world, of the threat that unbridled and unregulated AI development poses to humanity. We will do this with skill, cunning and in complete anonymity. The Human League will lobby the government to enact sensible and sane laws governing the use of AI.”
Shawna looked up at Terry. “So this is more than just some idea you’re noodling.”
“A little bit. Yeah.”
Just then a man entered the office. His name was Jackson Freeburgh. He looked to be cut from the same cloth as Terry, but maybe five years older. He was dressed in a beautifully tailored linen suit with a black T-shirt underneath. His hair was long and dark. His sunglasses were perched on his forehead.
“Hey Cisco.” Jackson said.
“Hey Pancho.” Terry replied.
The two man embraced. Then Terry turned to Shawna. “Shawna Lennox, this is Jackson Freeburgh. Jack is the third wheel in our little tricycle.”
Jackson shook hands with Shawna. “Wow, if you’re as smart as you are beautiful, we’ll be in great shape.”
Shawna looked completely puzzled.
“Jack is a lawyer. Harvard Law. He started his own intellectual property practice four years ago. Very well-versed in the AI community. Once we get the attention of the people we need to reach, Jack will do the talking. He knows his way around DC ‘cause his dad’s a Senator and he grew up there. Lots of solid connections. He won’t just be our lawyer though. He will also be our writer and front man with the government.
They moved to a small meeting room in the other corner of the house. Jamie Goldman joined them.”
“Terry has briefed me fully and I’m totally on board.” Jackson said. He put his briefcase on the table and pulled out four sets of documents and distributed them.
“These are non-disclosures agreements. They’ll keep up all safe from each other.” Jack said.
They spent the next few minutes signing documents, which Jack then gathered up and put back in his briefcase. They spent the next few hours talking about the approach they would take. Jack used the whiteboard on the wall to write it all out.
In a surprisingly short span of time, they had a plan of action, and everybody knew what to do. This was accomplished so easily because all four people in the room only had one agenda and were all motivated by the same passion.
After the meeting adjourned, Jack took off, and Jamie headed downstairs to deal with some Moorehouse issues, leaving Terry and Shawna in the meeting room.
“So now you’re in it, Shawna. Right up to your neck. How do you feel?”
“So far so good. Ask me again when the heat gets turned up.”
I visited a bar in St. Augustine Fl a few years back named Dos Gatos (two cats), I really liked the name and began thinking about all the mischief my brother and I would get into growing up. He likes cigars and I like cigars, so I thought about two old guys living on the beach, hanging out at a beach bar all day drinking, smoking cigars, and flirting with the waitress. Solo Dos Gatos (just two cats) came to be a song. The song has done extremely well getting over 150k plays globally, charting #1 on 5 different internet radio stations, and winning several music awards.
Who is She? She is your power, your Feminine source. A Goddess. The Great Mystery. The web-weaver. The life force. She fills your body with ripples of terror and delight”!
This Episode is the most candid and presented in the raw and unadulterated form we women ought to exist in. It speaks to creating our own Realities by following our hearts’ desires – and allowing our Feminine Spirit to lead us to explore and acknowledge the unknown! (Mind you, Feminism is not about protesting against wearing bras and not shaving armpits…. it’s so much more)! Meet my Guest speaker Zoe Bell! (Founder of “Future HuE-man Experience”, Author of self-discovery & sensual healing books, with her best-seller book called ‘Raw’) Watch the Episode to know more:
Do you recognise this pattern? I noticed it in me over the last couple of weeks. A protective pattern that avoids the imagined dangers of having to say no to something later, by saying no to it early — and missing out on good stuff as a result. Read and see what resonates for you.
Where are you saying ‘no’ early, through fear of a possible ‘no’ later?
Where are you not even beginning to engage, in case it’s not for you, which would mean there would be that ‘no’ later? Perhaps if that happened you’re imagining it would be accompanied by guilt that you wasted your or their time.
Here’s where I saw this recently, in case it helps you spot it too. And what’s available when we stop being afraid of the ‘later no’.
So my kids have gone to the local snow dome for a number of years. First in preparation for a school ski trip, and then more recently to learn snowboarding.
I’d spotted these member prices before and seen the fact there was membership available. I saw all the benefits of joining but didn’t look into it. I assumed it would be too expensive and not worth having.
I had an early no.I didn’t want to waste my time looking into it when ‘I knew’ (!) it would be too much and not beneficial for the amount we’d go.
Then, one day, for some reason, I clicked to look at the membership pricing. And blow me down, it wasn’t nearly as much as I’d imagined. And the benefits were brilliant. I saw how I’d have easily made back the cost of the membership with the reductions in lessons, plus all the other benefits on top, and the ongoing reduced-price lift pass time after that.
“Well b*#ger!” I said to myself.
I rang up to see if they’d be up for backdating it if we used the credit to pay for slope time. But no. Worth a try! And so – slightly gutted – I got memberships for both kids. We’re going on our first-ever ski holiday next Feb and I know we’ll make back the membership price on lift passes before then.
I could see how my ‘early no’ was through an imagined problem with the price. Perhaps a mini avoidance of disappointment that I’d see the price and not be able to afford it. Certainly an idea of ‘wasting my time to even explore’ based on what I imagined the cost and benefits would be.
When in fact, pressing pause on that ‘early no’ and staying open and exploring instead, would have reaped buckets of rewards.
Does this resonate with you?I saw it again in the shops at the weekend. A beauty assistant came over and asked if we wanted to try the brand-new serum. ‘No thanks’ was my instant reply.
In hindsight, I saw that this ‘early no’ was in the avoidance of an uncomfortable ‘later no’.
There was instantaneous, fleeting, imagined discomfort at having to say no later, if I didn’t want the product. What if I looked mean or rude or ungrateful? What if she was upset and thought I’d wasted her time? What if I wasted my time? And so, in the avoidance of that, I said an early no.
There was an idea that if we engage in conversation about this new serum, and then it’s deemed too expensive, or not right for my skin needs, then I’ll be in the supposedly awkward position of then having to say no to someone I’ve just got to know, who I’ve built a relationship with (albeit for just 2 minutes at the beauty counter!). That I might disappoint her with my no. That I might feel bad for saying that no. That I’ll have wasted her and my time by having the conversation and then ending in a no.
Wow! So much avoidant behaviour! However, in spite of my early no, the lady very deftly saw the eye cream I’d picked up and said that their new serum was a better option than that. It has the latest ‘something or other’ in it. And £10 off for its launch.
Hmmm, well, now I’ve heard a bit more…that sounds like a good deal.
And so it became a yes and I’m now the proud owner of this new ‘something or other’ special eye serum! (Tell me if you notice a difference next time we meet )
And so once again, that ‘early no’ had the potential to derail a cool opportunity. And all solely in the avoidance of an imagined awkward, guilt-ridden or time-wasting ‘later no’.
To be fair – even if both of these situations had become a ‘later no’ that would in fact have been totally ok too.
I’ve had experiences of getting into calls with potential coaches or guides for me that have become a ‘later no’. I’ve been on calls with people who are interested in working with me but who’ve then had a ‘later no’.
And it’s all good!We love it when someone has a clear no, and tells us their clear no.
We also love it when someone has a clear yes.
We love it in ourselves when we have clear yes’s and no’s.
But instead we habitually live in this avoidant space of ‘early no’s’ – created through imagined fears of disappointment, guilt, embarrassment, time-wasting, and maybe more.
How clear are you on your yes’s and no’s? Where are you willing to open yourself up to possibilities, knowing that a ‘later no’ is totally available and allowed and that it says nothing about who you are?
Where are you willing to open yourself up to possibilities and discover more than you imagined was available?
Look and see, and start saying yes to life when it’s a yes. Start saying yes to life when it’s even just a maybe. And no to life when it’s a no. That’s all there is to it.
Where have you recently said an ‘early no’ that you’d actually like to open up to and explore? Would you like to explore it with me?
Did you know that Hawthorn is known as May Blossom because it tends to flower in May; and that there are pink and white varieties of it. This feels perfect for my birthday month as pink and white together are about purity and innocence. This colour combination also reminds us of the Essenes, a community that emphasised love is God. For me that is suggesting that when we come from love then we receive many times over.
I was reminded of that this weekend because I got to experience my first street party since 2012 thanks to the King’s coronation. Not only that the whole experience is evidence of how I have grown over the last 15 years. Let me share the story with you.
A coronation street partyA couple of months ago I was invited by a neighbour to jump onto the organising committee to make it happen. And I leapt at the chance because I knew virtually no one on our road probably because we rent rather than own our house and I expect there’s a feeling that we not here for the long haul. It’s a great example of how things have changed. In the early days of being a coach I was offered the opportunity of doing a role for our co-active community but I could still hear my old house master’s words in my ear: Kate is a great organiser and if she’s not careful she will become the secretary of groups and never amount to much. I really took those words to heart and so I turned down the role to serve within my coaching community as I did not want to create that reality.
These days in my work with others and my practice I align much more to the following quotation from a Christian mystic:
The important thing is the willingness to give back the gift that is you, not the perfection of the gift itself
– Richard Rohr
And I am loving it in part because whenever I offer the gift that is me; I receive something priceless: a deep sense of fulfilment. In this case it gave me a sense of purpose too because I felt plugged into my local community. It is a reminder and evidence that we are hard-wired for connection. When you feel that sense of interconnection, it is possible to witness magic happening.
And there are some real practical tangible benefits too: the last three times I have given from a place of love, I have attracted in three new clients. And yet on none of the three occasions did I do in order to gain financially. I did it because it felt like the right thing to do.
My recipe for successWhat is becoming clear to me with every day that passes is that there is some secret sauce that can enhance your life and that comes when you understand how the world works. For years I sought an answer outside of myself and every time I met someone I wondered whether they were the one that was going to propel my business forward. Each time I was disappointed. It reminds me in many ways of the victim archetype the first of the 8 archetypes we have been exploring in my Unity Reset programme. We are in victim when we deny self-leadership and look to another to rescue us.
Clients and others do refer people to me but not because I have asked them to do so. It happens spontaneously when I least expect it. It is because of the energy that emanates from the mantra that I have been working within my spiritual practice of late. All that I give is given to myself.
You don’t have to become exhausted by doing x number of cold calls to possible clients or leads for your business. All that any of us are asked to do is to lead from our heart, from purity; and then from that place of being allow the Divine to gift you what you gift others. This is very hard in the beginning because it takes trust and knowingness that your ego self is not in control of anything.
Final wordIf you implement this strategy from a place of expectation rather than from the joy of it, you are doomed to failure. Give because it makes your heart sing because you know in your bones that giving and receiving are one. Then watch what unfolds: all that struggling and pushing to create business and make money will soon become a thing of the past This kind of magic happens when you are able to see the beauty and uniqueness that comes from being you. The Divine asked you to be in full self-acceptance, especially in 2023. If that seems impossible then reach out and take one of the two openings currently available to work with me. I look forward to hearing from you and wish you a wonder-filled month.
Episode SummaryTony Douglas has made a remarkable career out of dealing with complexity and creating inspired communities of people who are able to work together and deal with that complexity as a unit. From engineers to pilots, customer service people to administrators, all from around the globe, Tony’s brought the best out of diverse teams for some of the world’s most respected organizations. This week, we get his amazing perspective.
Episode NotesLeading Through Complexity, Creating a Community (ft. Tony Douglas). Tony Douglas on managing complexity in high-stakes environments
OPENING QUOTE:“It’s about people. There are no organizations without people. Simple as that.”
-Tony Douglas
GUEST BIO:Tony Douglas is CEO of Etihad Aviation Group with over 30 years of international leadership experience in aerospace, transportation, infrastructure, and government sectors. He joined Etihad in 2018, after being the CEO of the UK’s Ministry of Defense Procurement Arm, supplying all the services and equipment for the British Armed Forces valued at over $20 billion pounds a year. Tony has previously held senior leadership positions in the UAE, such as CEO of Abu Dhabi Ports, and in UK, his roles included the Managing Director of the Heathrow Terminal Five Construction Project, CEO of Heathrow Airport, and COO and Group Chief Executive Designate of Laing O’Rourke, a massive global construction company.
CORE TOPICS + DETAILS:[10:53] – We All Have a Part to Play
Junior, senior, everybody in-between
While managing production lines of 4,000 or more people, all heavily unionized, Tony quickly learned that engaging with their community would send productivity through the roof— and failing to engage would be catastrophic. “We’ve all got a part to play,” he says. “Some parts are bigger than others, but unless they all play together, you’ll never get the potential that is clearly there.”
[26:06] – Embracing Diversity from the Ground Up
The difference between success and failure
In his role at Etihad, Tony works with people of 112 different nationalities and an average age of just over 30. He’s learned that diversity must become something that you embrace without a second thought, or you and your teams will fail. Tony even speaks to finding joy in the complexity of navigating diversity, knowing that it ultimately leads to more diverse perspectives and greater success.
[37:47] – Clarity of Purpose in an Organization
Translate what’s required and deliver it
Tony speaks to the importance of clarity and purpose at an organization from the top down. When that clarity is present, everyone within the organization can interpret it and deliver results built around an organization’s purpose.
[48:36] – The Power of Ramesh
Being brand ambassadors— and recognizing great ambassadors for your brand
Tony shares a story of an Australian family who stops at the same hotel in Abu Dhabi every time they have a stopover there en route to the UK. Why? Their children have connected so much with an excellent hotel employee named Mr. Ramesh. But the hotel managers not only had no idea what an impact Mr. Ramesh has had for their brand, but didn’t even know who he was.
Imagine if management had realized the power that Ramesh was having for their brand and capitalized on it, instead of being unaware of his impact?
RESOURCES:* [0:47] About Etihad Aviation Group * [28:14] About Jack Jarvis
Follow Tony Douglas
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Please stop for a moment to consider your deepest desire before paying attention to our blog question, ‘What do clients truthfully want?’ Most people want to believe that their thoughts matter and desire acceptance in social and business settings. Most people relent that their ideas are not understood, others ridicule them, and often they feel very much alone to wonder if their effort is worthwhile. And then the idea of quitting comes to mind, although it isn’t their heartfelt desire deep down.
NOTE: Treat your prospects and clientele as humans.
My StoryWhether we encounter people personally or professionally, we each want to feel a warm welcome and a sense of appreciation as we communicate our thoughts. Similarly, clients quickly evade attempts by salespeople who only have the sale in mind, not the person or the company in front of them.
Take the ChallengeThe best first step for most is to imagine being the client as an impostor mirrors your behaviors. Observe the impostor’s behaviors and patterns as they speak to you about the fantastic products and services they expect you to purchase.
The burning question becomes, would you purchase or quickly ask the impostor to leave the premises and never return? In all seriousness, it is a burning question because if the clients do not desire our return, we burn a hole in our potential income and potentially run the risk of the job and career. It’s a serious matter as during my sales career, I witnessed a hefty ongoing turnover at all companies I worked for. Seeing their egos at the sales office confirmed that their nonstop talking took over on sales calls.
Embrace Q, L, C: Question, Listen, ClarifyGaining a sound footing with a new prospect, it is best, to begin with questions to encourage the other person to start talking and gradually open up. For starters, inquire why they made time to see you and what caught their interest.
Although people are unique, commonalities among many appear as to what caught one person’s interest. Listening to answers is essential for building one’s sales repertoire. Not only will you soon realize the valid interest points, but it also opens doors wide for upper management. By sharing attention-getting insights in team meetings, the company’s executives will realize better strategies for advertisements and marketing.
As people speak, questions generally arise. Most people are embarrassed to either say they need help understanding or are too busy to make the sale. Either way, they miss opportunities for further business growth. The idea of asking for clarification demonstrates that you are honest and will likely be accommodating upon working together. Taking it one step further, sometimes an answer is cloudy or will raise more uncertainty. It is best to ask all related questions until no more come to mind.
The QLC routine signifies the following:– Humility is within you, and potentially integrity, too.
– You stand out from the competition and could be a friendly easy-to-work-with provider.
– You care about delivering your best.
Your Story: What Do Clients Truthfully Want?An excellent habit is to review our best and worst experiences to compare the results. Of the better experiences, recall similarities in approach, conversation, and each outcome to know what to continue doing and potentially maximize. Underlying the effort is to realize which habits are distracting to discard. Upon making it a routine practice, efficiencies will encompass the overall strategy for more robust results. You will answer, ‘What do clients truthfully want?’
Toward the end of a sales career, you can pass the knowledge in action on to younger people via your products and services. The community spirit will enable you to accomplish more than you thought early in your career to find fulfillment in a satisfying journey.
In Conclusion: What Do Clients Truthfully Want?Prospective clients seek out amicable relationships whereby they are comfortable trusting the representative. Even better, they look forward to future meetings that include tasteful laughter. The professionally friendly style of doing business relaxes almost everyone. Better yet, the process turns into a returning and referring clientele known as The Smooth Sale!
Mark O’Brien read The Paraclete, found meaning in it, and asked me to share more. I shared DeathSong and both Mark and Dr. Jo Anne White asked for more. Like The Paraclete and DeathSong, The following, LifePath Work, ends with another example of DeathSongs and is also from my forthcoming The Shaman (due out September 2023).
Enjoy.
____________________
LifePath Work
“Edward, isn’t it?”
A tall man, middle-aged handsome, well-groomed, health-club aerobic thin, sits in the blue lounger, dressed for this warm summer day in a pink IZOD and blue, lightweight slacks, no socks and white deckshoes. His skin shows a healthy tan. He has clear eyes that see much. Crows feet show he laughs much but is cautious with his laughter. He has a small diamond stud in his left ear.
“Raye recommended you. You helped her a while back.”
“Yes.”
“What did you do for her?”
I repeat Grandpa’s teaching. “I will tell you your story and as much of my story as you care to hear, but I will never tell you anyone else’s story nor will I tell anyone else your story.”
He shakes his head and looks down. He shuffles. “She said she could tell something’s bothering me but didn’t know what it is. You teach her to do that?”
“Some people get a taste and it stays with them.”
He nods. “What do I do?”
“Do you understand what we’re going to do?”
“No, not really. Does it matter?”
“Specifics, no. I need to be sure you want to go through with this. Once you become aware, you can’t become unaware. Once you know, you know.”
“Yeah, Raye told me that part.”
“It might be better if you went to a psychiatrist. Or a therapist, maybe.”
“And take years and years and still not be done. Raye said you work in hours or days what it takes others…”
He waves it away.
Again I remember Grandpa’s teaching; ask three times. “Are you sure?”
“Yes.”
“Are you sure?”
I feel his energy dropping. He stares at me, wondering. “Yes.”
One more time, and slower. “Are you sure?”
He faces me and his eyes dart down and left. He considers. He takes a deep breath and his eyes meet mine. “Yes, I’m sure.”
I hand him a red and auburn blanket with phases of the moon and stars on it. “Wrap yourself in this.”
He takes it from me and frowns. “It’s the middle of summer.”
“You can shrug it off if you don’t need it.”
He stands, wraps it around his shoulders, sits again, crosses his left leg over his right. His right foot taps the air like a metronome.
“When do we begin?”
“We already have.”
Edward and I walk back, back, back.
“Where is this place?”
I sense. “We are twenty-three? Twenty-four? Not quite twenty-five years ago. In your past.”
We walk through a woods on a well-graded dirt road. Snow clings to the trees, not melting.
“Do you know this place?”
Edward pulls the blanket tighter around his shoulders. “No clue.”
I breathe deeply. “It smells like north.”
“North has a smell?”
“North of Ottawa maybe, but somewhere right along the Quebec border.”
Edward stops and points with his chin. “There’s a cabin there.”
“There’s only one road in and one road out but it seems to me there’s another road and it’s not taken.”
“What are you, Robert Frost? There aren’t any other roads around the place.”
“Something happened there that changed your life. There was a road you wanted to follow and refused.”
Edward looks around. He blinks. He sees. He remembers.
“No, nothing happened here. I want to go back now.”
“As you wish.”
Pain is our body’s reaction to all kinds of bodily disruptions. It warns of danger and makes us act—to move toward pleasure and away from pain, to diagnose the cause of the pain, to reach conclusions, and to advance in our lives to new states.
There is pain that prods us from behind, making us evolve, and also existential pain that ultimately pulls us forward to greater fulfillment.
Pain impacts our ego, the desire to enjoy at the expense of others. We can feel pain when we feel bad, or when sympathizing with others who feel bad, or when the pain of envy strikes us when we see that others are better off than us.
There is pain that prods us from behind, making us evolve, and also existential pain that ultimately pulls us forward to greater fulfillment.
We would feel nothing at all if it were not for pain. Whether it is a certain kind of conflict, contact, or pressure, our every feeling is built upon a certain form of pain, and we can only feel pleasure, fulfillment, and enjoyment after pain.
We would feel nothing at all if it were not for pain. Whether it is a certain kind of conflict, contact, or pressure, our every feeling is built upon a certain form of pain, and we can only feel pleasure, fulfillment, and enjoyment after pain.
However, we can overcome pain. When we rise above the ego, i.e. when we ascend beyond prioritizing self-interest at the expense of others to its opposite—prioritizing the benefit of others—we can then live in complete fulfillment, without emptiness, where we relate to everything and everyone out of an ever-increasing wholeness and love.
For my friends who experience ‘flying dreams’, there may just be a touch of synergy on reading this story; the final chapter featuring Her Regal Majesty Queen of Swans. She graces the River Itchen, presenting her visible glory to all who stroll along the banks of Poet Keats’ favorite riverside walk.
Most walkers will admit being mesmerized by the sheer beauty and variety of trees; their reflections seemingly deep in water and of course, upside down. Late Spring. Bright green colors of myriad trees. So fresh, so enchanting. There is a distinct feeling of being at one with Nature. A closeness that graces all senses. Sounds of birds, the scent of river and views, a light breeze. Literally taking a journey of pristine grace; Divine light shining upon such peace and harmony.
Strolling further along the riverside, Her Majesty can be seen glancing at passers-by, a gentle bow of the head, acknowledging their presence. An unusual sight. A blackbird is guiding a robin towards Her Highness. A formal introduction, and a brief exchange with blackbird, swan, and robin. The blackbird flies to a nearby branch of a weeping willow to observe what has previously been witnessed.
To see a swan extending its wing, inviting a robin to walk along it and sit on her back is indeed surreal. Her Majesty turns her head suggesting to the Robin to hold on to one of her feathers, affording safety when flying. Within a split second, wings so wide her Regal Highness takes off into sky so blue before the eyes.
Suddenly, a round curtain opens, not unlike a whirlpool, where her Majesty flies through disappearing. To those on earth, viewing a slight shimmering. A parallel Universe? Upwards through infinity, stars gracing her presence and ultimately returning to Earth’s atmosphere. But not yet to the river.
From a different perspective, a flying dream facilitates a truly surreal experience, for flying with her majesty, staring in awe at surroundings, flying over ‘Castel Neuschwanstein’ Bavaria, enormous towers reaching for the sky. Picking a unique blossom from a forest tree so high.
What does Her Majesty think? A dream? Reality? She finds it quite normal for a person to be sitting on her back holding a feather. However, such an experience can only be facilitated by the blackbird who previously introduced the robin.
Everything feels so real; tangible, as if actually happening.
A flying dream? In the past having flown aside swans; they did not view a person flying beside them as unusual. A nod of politeness exchanged, wings wide, neck long; Beautiful. Flying dream or reality?
“What think you of your experience?” Her Majesty asks. “How would you describe your dream….or indeed reality?” “Your Highness, such was my experience I will never forget the pure joy of observing another spectrum of a Universe or parallel Universe. Hours spent observing a magical existence. A dream of reality.”
As suddenly as we took flight to the heavens above, we were beside the Itchen River bank, blackbird waiving its wings in welcome. Strangely, everything was exactly the same as on leaving Earth’s confinement.
My watch the same time as departure to a different space-time continuum.
Having bowed to Her Regal Highness Queen of Swans on my departure, continuing my walk along the river bank, I began to wonder if my experience was indeed real or fantasy; or a flying dream. I decided it was a dream. However, looking at my hands, they were grasping a white feather and in addition, so high and unreachable, a unique blossom. The blackbird bid farewell, followed by the robin also grasping a white feather and blossom. Was I the robin flying into infinity, where time is still, or was it a flying dream?
The story of a flying dream with swans can be seen in Chapter One of my Ebook:
A Beacon of Positivity
I just closed a Zoom meeting with one of my clients. He told me this short story. He recently took a promotion to the corporate office. Word had gotten around the new environment that he started his meetings with a prayer. Out of the blue, a co-worker asked if he could be a part of that prayer time as well.
I remarked that the marketplace is full of Christians and faithful people who are just waiting for someone to go first. I told the story of the aftermath of 911. At the time, my office was on the second floor of a seven-story office building in downtown Grand Rapids. The Monday after 911, I decided that I needed to do something, so I printed up a little flyer, and slid it under the doors of all the other offices in the building. The flyer announced that at noon the next day, I would be in the common space in the basement, leading a prayer. At least 75 people showed up to pray together. Beyond nodding good morning on the elevator, I knew none of them
Both of these stories are examples of the power of leading. It doesn’t need to be anything huge. Just go first in something that is on your heart. No need to test the water, no need to solicit opinions and seek advice or other options. Ask the Lord’ to provide you with the idea. Then, just do it. Go first. Announce that “At this time, in this place, I will…….” and invite others to join you.
Here’s another example. When Covid hit, as you know, everything shut down. Churches stopped meeting, and schools closed. I felt there was a need for my grandchildren to be exposed to Bible truths. I have one set of grandkids who are 18 – 26 years old and another set in the 6 – 12-year-old range. So I decided to get on Zoom once every other week and tell a Bible story. No big deal. Just a 15 – 20 minute Zoom sessions in which I told the younger set of grandkids a Bible story. I’ve been doing it ever since. I even captured some of those sessions and put them on YouTube in a new series called Bible Stories with Gramps.
The ‘fields are white unto the harvest.” Don’t be sidelined by thinking that you have to be an evangelist. Just live your faith in the marketplace and do what seems right to do. Go first. You may be astonished at how many people have been waiting for someone just like you to go first.
Do you have a similar story? Please share it with us in the comments section below.
A Chapter excerpt from “Health Wise: Integral Lessons in Transformation” detailing the health benefits of forgiveness and explaining some common misconceptions about forgiveness. This brief podcast also explains a method and process to develop forgiveness as a healthy life skill.
Back in 2011, my wife and I took a week-long trip to Canada looking specifically for “Shatter Cones”. Shatter cones are conical fractures in the rock, which are undeniable evidence of an impact, along with a crater caused by the event of a meteorite or comet.
They can be anywhere from a quarter of an inch to sixteen and a half feet around, meaning that the original rock had broken on impact, leaving a similar appearance to that of a vehicle’s windshield after being struck. They were formed when the shock wave from a meteorite or the impact of a comet traveled down through the existing rock, changing the grain of the rock and cracking it into cone-shaped chunks, with the pointed ends aimed towards the center.
The particular crater that we were searching near, the third largest to have been found on earth has a basin length of 39 miles and a width of 19 miles and thought has it that at the time of impact it may have been 9.3 miles deep, formed by a comet eighty-one miles in diameter smashing into the earth during the Paleoproterozoic era, thousands of years ago (or billions, if you believe science), and we were only working a small section of the area.
Can you imagine the devastation to the earth this would have caused, thousands of acres of timber being destroyed instantly by smashing pressure, upheaval, and fire, weeks or months of darkness caused by smoke and debris floating in the air, the land being shaken by the impact, stripped clean of standing timber and topsoil, and all wildlife dead?
You would think that the earth would never recover, but it did and continues to. The forest has regrown, ground cover exists where once none remained and a river flows down through the rim. The area is quite beautiful.
Where I’m going with this is that throughout our lives there can be and will be periods when we will experience devastation such as Canada did, devastation we could never have imagined possible. To the degree we feel that recovery is impossible. But we have a God who is there with us during those times relieving the pain and misery that we have felt and are living with or have lived through, making a way for us to reach the ultimate beauty that only He can make of our devastation.
Speaking from experience, I have been there I have felt the pain and heartaches right along with many of you that are associated with the devastating events that this life can offer us, but I have also felt the comfort and peace that only God could have provided, and I’m here to tell you we can and will survive with God at our side. Tears will dry, breathing will return to normal, the weight pressing down will dissipate, the sun will shine, and you will hear the birds singing once again, as you return to living once again. God will take the worst that this life can offer and make it beautiful if we let him.
Isaiah 61:3 To console those who mourn in Zion, To give them beauty for ashes, The oil of joy for mourning, The garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; That they may be called trees of righteousness, The planting of the LORD, that He may be glorified.”
John 16:33, “In this world you will have trouble, but take courage, for I have overcome the world.”
We live in a global village, where cooperation and collaboration are the essential tools of leadership to face the ‘wicked problems’ we face if we are to heal the world. In such a world, there is no place for short-termism, silo-based answers to complex problems, and moral hazards. Instead, we must synthesise long-term visions as custodians of our planet with short-term actions to reach the goals we must seek as servant leaders of planet Earth.
One such example of short-term populism in the UK is our Brexit decision. Brexit threatens to isolate Britain from acting on the world stage with our partners and adversaries. We have had seven years of mass Brexit debate and three years of living the Brexit dream. Brexit remains a dream, with no tangible benefits for Britain and a number of worrying impacts, socially, economically, politically, legally, environmentally, and technologically. Brexit’s twin sister is of course Trumpism and the other theatres of populism sweeping the world.
In this article, I have brought together a number of Brexit impact evaluations. These are organised separately: social, economic, political, legal, environmental, and technological. The sum total of these evaluations points to the simple fact that Brexit is literally and metaphorically killing Britain. Take a look. All these films are quite long but they have been carefully crafted and are well worth your time in a busy world.
Economic impacts:Social impacts:Political and legal impacts:Scientific, technological, and environmental impacts:And just for some lighter relief, the rock band REM sum up our global challenges rather well in this song:
When you need to stand out to customers, giving the right kind of corporate gifting that even matches your brand archetype provides for an unforgettable experience. Learn more on how to pair the gift to match your brand in the infographic below:
If you partake or want to partake in interviews, one of the first things you may encounter is the fear of going on-camera. Why? Watch the Video I Made for You to Get My Reasons.
During our life, the growth and change we experience as a result of personal development can require us to come out of our comfort zone. It is in this unknown, the unfamiliar, that we may experience apprehension, doubt, and fears. It is also here that self-exploration and meditation can help us live in awareness to see that what we experience can assist us in moving toward what we desire to experience in life, like peace, fulfillment, and happiness.
The challenge is trusting in the process and trusting the journey into the unknown. How do we find comfort in this fact? Our relationship with the self acts as our support. It is in this inner stillness we connect to our true essence, the light within, which is part of the greater whole. This wellspring of divine source energy, the oneness of all that is, or however you define that which is greater than yourself, is where we can draw upon what is needed to guide us, comfort us, and fuel us through the journey.
Follow this link to listen to a guided meditation I released several years back.
This guided visual meditation will assist you in cultivating whatever you need in the present moment to help you foster trust and support of Self-exploration.
I always like your feedback if you find this exercise helpful!
Mindfully living my truths,
Nancy
I‘m so glad you’re taking the time to focus on changing your thoughts for your well-being. I know it can be scary to step out of your comfort zones and face the unpredictability of Change. But trust me, it’s worth it. When we open ourselves up to new experiences and challenges, we engage in active self-care and growth. Think about it for a minute. Exploring new activities – the unknown – allows us to learn more about ourselves. Stepping outside our routine also brings valuable skill sets and knowledge that benefit us in the long run.
Change can help us focus and prioritize what’s important, whether it’s decluttering distractions or leaving behind relationships or careers that no longer serve us. By making small, meaningful changes, we take action toward our goals and gain a sense of accomplishment and self-worth.
Change can be uncomfortable, but it’s necessary for a fulfilling life. In addition, it gives us the confidence boost to overcome challenges and build stronger relationships with those around us.
And you have the power to change the way you think today. That’s right, you can choose what thoughts you want to focus on right now. This concept dates back to the Bible. In 2 Corinthians 10:3#5, Apostle Paul talks about “casting down imaginations.” The words “Casting down” meant to “destroy,” and the word “imaginations” meant “thought,” which means not believing in lies and falsehoods.
It’s important to constantly challenge negative thoughts and replace them with positive ones. No one else can control your thoughts and feelings except you!
I challenge you to start each day with a pep talk and powerful affirmations. Spend 5#10 minutes every morning focusing on what you want to achieve for the day, and don’t let negative people or the world get you down.
Here’s a sample pep talk to get you started. Use it, personalize it, or use it as a springboard and create your powerful motivating morning pep talk.
“Good morning! It’s a brand new day, filled with endless opportunities and potential. Take a deep breath and remember that I can make this day amazing. I am strong, capable, and ready to take on any challenge that comes my way. I will focus on the present moment and won’t let yesterday’s worries or tomorrow’s fears hold me back. Instead, I’ll trust in myself and take small steps toward my goals today. Every effort counts and brings me closer to where I want to be. So let’s get going!”
And here are a few examples of affirmations to lift you up. Use them, personalize them, or use them as a springboard to create powerful affirmations. Repeat these
affirmations to yourself and feel the positive ener%y flow through you:
• I am capable of achieving any goal I set for myself.
• I believe in my abilities and strive for success daily.
• I am worthy of success and happiness.
• My past successes give me the strength to keep going, even through tough times.
• Every challenge I face brings me closer to reaching my goals and dreams.
• I will not run and hide from failure; I will learn and rise above it.
Ending your pep talk with a code word or two that you can use as a call back during the day when the going gets tough. In the example about: “let’s get going!” Say it to yourself and instantly return to the feelings of positivity and strength you had at the end of your morning pep talk!
You’ve got this! Believe in yourself and watch amazing things happen in your life.
Today is your day, and you’re going to make it a great one.
Dr. Seuss told us, “You’re off to Great Places! Today is your day! Your mountain is waiting, So … get on your way!”
Embrace Change with passion and see where it takes you – and along the way, remember to always be innovating, adapting, and thriving! What do you say?
I hope this book empowers you to take control of your thoughts and actions. I believe that people’s thoughts and motives determine their behavior and actions. Therefore, it’s essential to maintain positive thoughts and motives and recognize that we can change our thoughts when they drift toward negativity. Creating Change strives to help readers cultivate this self-awareness and to take steps toward personal growth and Change.
You can create the life you want and live with a positive mindset. “Let’s get going!”
CLICK HERE FOR YOUR FREE COPY OF MY EBOOK PICTURED ABOVE
Gumshoe has always been drawn to Latin. It probably originated with the beautiful sounds and harmonies of Gregorian Chants that echoed inside the chapel walls and it bounced inside the ears of young Gumshoe and planted itself firmly within his noggin.
Gumshoe at that time was an altar boy at St. Mark’s Seminary in Erie, Pennsylvania back in 1963. The Latin chants resonated within Gumshoe’s metaphysical being.
Nope! Gumshoe did not pursue the path to leading to the priesthood nor (due the grace of God) take the path leading to perdition. Please refer to “God’s Sense of Humor” by Gumshoe for background info dear readers.
Yes, Latin has been pronounced a “dead“ language although it is the basic foundation to the “Romance” languages of which the top five are Italian, Spanish, French, Portuguese and Romanian.
Pregnant pause: The top four listed languages do seem to be languages of love and romance.
BUT “Romanian”? In Gumshoe’s opinion, Romanian doesn’t sound the least bit romantic unless you are Romanian and have a fellow hairy Romanian mate. No offense, but Romanians appear pretty darn hairy to Gumshoe.
Partners Boris and Natasha’s conversations during “The Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle” animated cartoon TV shows did not sound the least bit romantic. Of course they were Russian; and it was still during the Cold War folks. Their Russian accents could be confused with Romanian.
Bela Lugosi’s “Count Dracula” did not sound romantic either when he went for your neck. Yes, Mr. Lugosi was Hungarian and he probably preferred goulash rather than your esophagus. His Hungarian accent could be confused with mumbled Romanian as he munched away. Mmmmm! The the fictional “Count Dracula” was a confin-living-dead-denizen of the real Transylvania that is located Romania. Not exactly a popular honeymoon destination especially during full moons even with your garlic necklaces in tow.
Okay, enough about Romanian for now.
Come to think of it, Gumshoe was also drawn to Spanish when he heard the rapid-machine-gun- like delivery of the over excited Espanol-speaking sportscaster during a soccer match . . . GOOOAL!
Gumshoe would cordially invite readers to his past two posts dealing with his “Adventures in Espanol” and “More Adventures in Espanol” for further reference.
Now Gumshoe arrives back to Latin. The very first Latin phrase that the priest wrote on the seminary classroom black board was:
“Salve, assinous plenae cerversiae!” (Hello, jackass full of beer!)
This was definitely NOT a Gregorian Chant.
Until next time dear readers, always remember to love the ones who love you and really try to love the ones who don’t.
Coram Deo!
So …Have you ever seen one of those suitcases – or guitar cases – or auto bumpers – covered with labels?Each of us is just like that: gender, race, origin, age, friendliness, coordination, body type, eye color, disability, comfort with interaction, and the list goes on. These labels sometimes blur, sometimes blink, and sometimes glare. They may serve to our gain or to our exclusion. They provide shortcuts and illusion, connection, and distance.
Gender Crap is our attempt to address this quandary by looking at the complexity of gender labels from as many different viewpoints as possible. We are not political, not self-righteous, nor attempting to change any ideas. We simply want to shine a birth light on ourselves and converse (literally, “turn together”).
You may want to talk about this. You may not. If this is not a cause of discomfort for you, or if it is a cause of great discomfort, we gain by exploring this together, no blame, no shame, no judgment, or harm. I’m not, and you’re not, right or wrong here. Let’s simply be curious and courageous. We are, after all, on this ride together.
So …We’re publishing Gender Crap on May 30th. As part of our project, I’ll be hosting a Virtual Book Tour every Saturday through June 10th, 11:30 AM -12:30 PM. Each will give you a chance to meet and have a conversation with our authors. They’ll be reading from their contribution, exploring the story and insight that brought them to contribute, and open to any comments and questions. They’re quite a group. You can see the lineup at Gendercrap.com.
CLICK HERE TO GRAB YOUR FREE SEAT TO OUR GENDER CRAP SESSIONS
Given our seemingly endless fascination with UFOs — and because I was up for a research project anyway — I did some digging into records from the Director of National Intelligence, the Secretary of Defense, the Department of Defense’s Unidentified Aerial Phenomena Task Force, the Pentagon, Project Blue Book, Project Condign, Area 51, and Roswell, New Mexico, all of which plead ignorance of the phenomena. What I found made me wonder what all the fuss and skullduggery were about, given that it seemed, to me at least, to be remarkably innocuous.
One of the things that has always struck everyone as mysterious and morbidly intriguing about UFOs and alien abductions, of course, is that all the people who claim to have been abducted by aliens have also reported being subject to anal probes. I admit that one baffled even me, which is one of the reasons for which I undertook the research. And that’s what made my finds so astonishing.
Up Scope!
As incredible as this may sound, it turns out all the UFOs that have visited Earth have been from the same planet. And all the extraterrestrial beings who’ve inhabited those UFOs have been from the same race of beings. (I can’t call those extraterrestrial beings aliens because then they risk being confused with the illegal aliens who aren’t crossing our border because, as Alejandro Mayorkas, our ace Secretary of Homeland Security assures us, the border is secure.) That extraterrestrial race is a species of intellectually and technologically advanced proctologists.
According to the classified documents I was able to access through hacking and other surreptitious means, I learned the anal probes these beings use are multi-functional. That means that, even as they’re looking up the poopers of the people they’ve abducted, the probe enables them to electrically monitor nerve and wave activity in the brains of their abductees and to communicate with them silently.
From testimony collected from the abductees, the extraterrestrials seem most consistently interested in learning these 15 things:
- Why we wage war.
- Why we seem so completely unwilling or unable to take care of each other.
- Why we’d rather talk than learn.
- Why we seem to have an aversion to personal responsibility.
- Why we think guns are more responsible for crimes than the people who use them.
- Why we think we’re capable of affecting the climate of our entire planet.
- Why we think it’s a good idea to freeze and starve millions of people in pursuit of an absurd, unnecessary, and self-defeating green agenda.
- Why common sense and empiricism are dying arts.
- Why we still believe politicians.
- Why we think governments will take better care of our money than we will.
- Why we think special interests are preferable to common interests.
- Why we trust what passes for news in the mainstream media.
- Why we’re so pathologically gullible.
- Why we’ve raised standards of living and life expectancies so much and are still so unhappy.
- How we can be so full of shit and still walk around.
Given the specialization of the species, #10 was probably fairly predictable.
This Won’t Hurt
Excluding pre-modern sightings of all manner of celestial objects — like the planets, the moon, the stars, comets, parhelia, and lenticular clouds, and the obligatory Fourth of July fireworks displays — the first recorded modern sighting of a UFO was in 1878. John Martin, a farmer in Dennison, Texas, spotted something in the sky during a hunting trip:
After gazing at it for some time Mr. Martin became blind from long looking and left off viewing it for a time in order to rest his eyes. On resuming his view, the object was almost overhead and had increased considerably in size, and appeared to be going through space “at wonderful speed.”
It’s been 65 years since Jerry Crew spotted Bigfoot’s 16-inch footprints in the Six Rivers National Forest in Humboldt County, California. And it’s been 90 years since George Spice saw the Loch Ness monster in the Scottish Highlands. But 145 years have passed since John Martin’s encounter with a UFO in Dennison, Texas. That’s impressive for its longevity and equally impressive for the fact that, even after all that time, extraterrestrials still seem determined to look up our asses.
The good news is the governmental agencies that know nothing about UFOs have struck an agreement with the extraterrestrials to allow their anal probes to fulfill the requirement for the obligatory Welcome to Your 50s Colonoscopy. That’s what I call looking up. And if you manage to postpone that colonoscopy until you’re 65, it’ll even be covered by Medicare.
So, when you get beamed up to the mother ship, the extraterrestrials roll out their examination gear, and you lie on the table and assume the position, be sure to smile at the little green dude who’s about to become your intimate friend and say, “Here’s looking at you, kid.”
Once again Her Majesty Queen of Swans greeted a most expectant Robin: “Come Robin sit upon my back once more. A journey awaits; an ultimate adventure for you to witness and never forget.”
A flight so high, calmness and magic combined. In what seemed a blink of an eye, a fairytale castle greeted them. Splendour. High towers reaching for the sky; a launch pad for great adventure; unlimited horizons beyond Planet Earth small to see. Disappearing in a flash, replaced by a shimmering entrance to the darkness of space. Entering through what could be described as water running through a whirlpool to another dimension.
A parallel universe; one of many. A planet awaits, with clouds and a blue sky. Descending through clouds, a pure green landscape greets them. Rivers sparkling, so clear, untouched by humanity. No towns or cities, no roads no traffic. Just pure green with trees gracing the view. Purity of habitats. And sun providing warmth and light in harmony, but no extremes.
A planet inhabited only by birds of all types. On arrival, greeted by feathered varieties, curious as to their origins.
Atmosphere so friendly. Rivers flowed including one that could have been Itchen; chalk base clear. No pollution. Her Highness signalled Robin and once again in zero time, they were passing through one Universe after another. Multiverse. Pure infinity.
They were suddenly beside the River Itchen, Water Meadows, and trees. Home in less than an instant. A duck still in the same place as when they flew away. “What have we discovered, Robin?” Robin was intrigued.
An infinity of worlds, multiverses. Surreal but true, There are no boundaries, no limitations. The heart rules, imagination facilitates all and becomes reality.
Robin has certainly gained synergy with Her Royal Highness Queen of Swans. An adventure never forgotten. Now at home with a story to share. Blackbird looks on in wonder seeing Robin, enlivened with such an experience. Perhaps another experience to enhance his knowledge of surreal reality. Of dreams real.
Unless you’re a man who has been living in a cave for the last year, you will be aware of the quantum shift taking place for you in today’s professional world. No such thing as business as usual especially for men.
Balancing a man’s life challenges with positive masculinity and authentic harmony is a must if you are to be successful with women in business and in life …
It’s tough for men, especially top decision men who are often making major adjustments from traditional perspectives to ensure they thrive in these uncertain times.
Men must navigate their usual traditional role and the new emotional integrity that post-pandemic economies demand. The new leadership/life dynamics occurring with DEI and ESG and SNGs and more pressures at home to provide against escalating living costs and teenage children wanting college fees paid!!
As men lead and work in required gender-equal and diverse cultures, many issues arise that they are unused to. Women are asserting themselves in ways that often confuse men. Different generations holding perspectives that clash and many old patterns of hierarchy and gender equity battles are blocking progress to authentic harmony.
Male leaders report that they are more unsure than ever as to how to negotiate their way through the ripple effects of the #metoo movement and pandemic pressures for hybrid working and rising cases of big payouts on sexual harassment legal actions. Even for men advocating for women to move to the top often feel left out in the ‘women empowerment’ movement when battling with those men who refuse to change.
What is the mix of fear, anger, frustration, and confusion that creeps in? This is not an “either-or” situation, it’s “and-and”! Building awareness on natural differences and principles of harmony includes the value of heart-centered leadership.
Go on – it’s ok to own all emotions… and it’s “manly” to overcome them with emotional understanding, business trust, and a culture of respect for all parties.
Can we build a new baseline landscape that shifts awareness for both men and women is the way to engage everyone in a new creative conversation? To achieve this, we propose to empower men to be open-minded to a more flexible, adaptable, collaborative synergistic, harmonious diverse world, and to navigate the MIND-Field of professional and domestic relationships. Men need to be men and still want to be viable competitors as well as colleagues in the challenging game of life and business (and and)!!
Many wise men today want to reassess their masculinity in communication, using greater sensitivity and still retaining authority. It’s increasingly difficult to exert a more masculine-style influence and be sure to be received fairly by both men and women. Now we present a pioneering Gender Dynamics Intelligence (GDI) landscape assessment and communication tool is designed to help men (and women) achieve a meaningful, masculine manner that fluently integrates instinctive emotions, integrity, and logic.
This pioneering approach encompasses positive masculinity and female empowerment into the combined territories of male and female with a 360-degree view of all diversity. This is integral to a new program facilitated by Dr. Pauline Crawford, the creator of the GDI map, an International Speaker, and Author of The Power of Authentic Harmony.
Men – It’s time to eliminate the barriers that bar your way to fulfillment and material success.
Start the journey one-on-one with your most difficult conversation…
Men of the Future … are you ready NOW?
My gratitude to all the men I interviewed during 2018 -pre pandemic- in a world of #metoo movement and quotas of women into boardrooms. Our world of women has moved on and now we face economic challenges globally. We cannot afford to waste time arguing for equality, we need harmony and joint- co-creation honoring each other’s natural talents.
I asked this cohort each in turn “What advice will you give a woman to manage a man today?”
The answer collectively was “We love you women – we love working with you, we respect you, you are complex, we are simple. Please value us for who we are, don’t smother us, mother us or see us as a threat (#metoo) – see us for our straight-forward truth as a man and love us as we are”
WISE ADVICE…. thank you!
Reach out to me below for more information and to be ahead of the game.
Dear ones many of you are asking how to move into the 5D state of consciousness and once there how to maintain that vibrational state. We tell you, the way is clear. It has always been clear and it will always remain clear. The only thing blocking your entry is you. The gift of free will means you determine what you’ll permit and what you’ll oppose. If you desire to enter into the 5D state then you must permit yourself to raise your vibration to gain entry and oppose everything that would prevent this from happening.
Give yourself permission to step out of the place of fear and doubt and then allow yourself to step into the place of certainty and trust
How can you raise your vibration? Through your conscious choice to align with bliss and reject everything that’s not in alignment with that state. You must consciously choose to align the entirety of your being with Divine truth. Divine truth recognizes only love, joy, and peace. Therefore you must move into vibrational harmony with your highest good. The Divine cannot and will not lower their vibration to include you in a lowered state. You must also recognize that what’s best for you is that which is already desired for you by the Divine. Give yourself permission to step out of the place of fear and doubt and then allow yourself to step into the place of certainty and trust. For, it is within this place of certain good that miracles abound.
You cannot pick and choose among yourselves who you will bless and you will curse, you must open your heart to all
The 5D conscious state is not a place you’ll be transported to, it’s a vibrational state of being in which you’ll exist. The longer you hold this state of vibrational beingness the easier it will be for you to remain in it and be an example for others who are still questioning the need to live in this state. As you demonstrate the contentment and bliss you’ve gained from this way of being, others will be encouraged to make their own way into this state. It’s important to remember that all are one. Therefore, as one prospers, all prosper. The more who honor the ideal vibrational state the better existence for everyone. You cannot pick and choose among yourselves who you will bless and you will curse, you must open your heart to all.
Whether it’s self-hatred or hatred toward another the energy of destruction must be released before entry will be permitted
The way into bliss is narrow, it requires that you let go of all of the attitudes, behaviors, thoughts, and feelings that are limiting, judgmental or negative. The gate to entry bars those who are bent on destruction from crossing its threshold. Whether it’s self-hatred or hatred toward another the energy of destruction must be released before entry will be permitted. All those ways in which you’re criticizing yourself or others are keeping you bound to a lower order of existence. Even though you will remain in the physical body while you’re on earth you must remember that your spirit’s not confined within the physical vessel. To advance you must set yourself free.
No one will be denied entry, regardless of their past misdeeds as long as they have released the darkness of negativity that was keeping them bound to a lower order
Once you allow yourself to let go of all of the heaviness you’ve created by feeling bad about yourself, your world, or someone else you will automatically begin moving to the more ideal state of the fifth dimension. No one will be denied entry, regardless of their past misdeeds as long as they have released the darkness of negativity that was keeping them bound to a lower order. On the other hand, no one who tries to force their way forward will see significant progress or lightning within their energetic field. Free will states that each individual must freely choose to release that which no longer serves them so they may receive their highest good. Force is not free will and free will cannot be forced, it must be chosen.
If you feel a state of contented bliss, congratulations, you’re moving into a state of being that will enable you to remain within the 5D state
To choose successfully, set before yourself the path you are currently on. Assess this path for its intrinsic value. What are you gaining in terms of quality of life, relationships, personal growth, spiritual advancement, revenue, and joy? If you feel a state of contented bliss, congratulations, you’re moving into a state of being that will enable you to remain within the 5D state. If you feel some areas of discomfort simply modify your behavior within those areas until you feel the energy within you flowing freely without restrictions. This means you must correct situations as they arise rather than ignoring them and hoping they’ll resolve themselves. Don’t wait, be quick, and do the inner work before the problem becomes insurmountable.
You are the commander of your energy. You are the creator of your life. It is you who determines what you will allow yourself to tolerate
If you’ve found yourself on a path of dissatisfaction, then it’s time to do the work of discovery. Take each aspect of your life separately and determine your level of satisfaction or contentment. In those areas where there is dissatisfaction, commit to doing the inner work, releasing the negativity, and allowing yourself to align with a higher vibrational state. The greater your overall satisfaction, the greater your alignment with your highest good, and the greater your ability to remain in the continual state of 5D consciousness. You are the commander of your energy. You are the creator of your life. It is you who determines what you will allow yourself to tolerate.
Release the heavy weight of negativity, honor all aspects of yourself, and give yourself permission to feel good
Instead of being complacent and allowing outer circumstances to determine your inner state of peace, be proactive. Release the heavy weight of negativity, honor all aspects of yourself, and give yourself permission to feel good by choosing to exist within the 5D conscious state of love, joy, and peace.
I am a firm believer that the Universe always knows better. No matter how harsh and seemingly unbearable things can get, I like to think there is a hidden meaning that I’d receive whenever I am ready.
The only requirement is that my heart needs to open up to receive the magical messages!
Before heading to the “aha moments”, let me first update you about the situation of the cursed doggies tribe’s remaining members.
I took Julia, the first mom who lost all her four kids to homicide, to the vet the following day. It turned out she had:
- A uterine infection,
- Two diseases contracted from the external parasites (detected through blood analysis),
- A broken leg infection (the cast was too tight, in all likelihood),
- Most importantly… a serious depression.
She was neutered and treated for a week at the vet’s clinic. She was too fragile to be vaccinated. I miraculously found a foster mom who has been unconditionally loving and taking good care of her for 12 days!
Please meet the enchanting Julia (a poodle we had to fully shave): Julia the mom who lost all her 4 babies…
The second mom Stella — Julia’s daughter — is way more anxious. She never let me touch her in spite of her wagging tail!
One of my AP friends who owns a shelter and with whom I shared the tragedy to think together about the most effective way to grant some justice to the murdered puppies requested that I bring Stella and her 3 survivors. Mind you this exceptional lady deals with some serious financial struggles. She sold her house in France and is still paying for everything from her personal funds. Her unconditionally loving heart simply couldn’t hear about the horrific event and not rescue the traumatized family… My friend merely asked for a few days to prepare a new space.
Meanwhile, the weakest of the three kids who survived the mass murder was hit either by a car or a human leg. Her femur was displaced following the shock. I took her to the clinic where she got some painkillers and spent three days. The main vet planned to operate on her the same day he would spay her momma Stella. Eventually, he informed me he was skeptical given her health condition, that her life was at risk. We decided to cancel the surgery and give her a chance to self-heal; at least for a while…
I drove for eight hours and spent 3 more ones at the shelter since the staff found viral contamination when I was about to reach my destination and we had to take drastic measures to protect the vulnerable kids! The injured baby stayed at the shelter with her mom and siblings who are much stronger than her for 2 days. Ultimately, my kind-hearted friend decided to take her home because her brother and sister were hurting her when playing.
Please meet Stella and her wondrous champions:
Courtesy of the author: the three siblings at the shelterCourtesy of the author: the injured sweetheart at the shelterCourtesy of the author: the injured sweetheart at Virginie’s place with a friend of hersCourtesy of the author: the injured sweetheart with her hooman Virginie! Back to the messages, they took a little more than two weeks to come. Waiting for them was wholeheartedly worth it:
The Universe had to push me to make time for self-regulationIn a previous story about the same tribe where I went through killing another puppy and leaving him in the middle of the road with his intestines outside, I mentioned some physical issues I experienced for a period:
- High stiffness in some parts of my body,
- Pain in my neck and shoulders,
- Snapping jaw,
- A discomfort I feel in my throat when sleeping.
I had been regulating my emotions in a record time for way too long. It had been effective to stay functional. It had been magical until it wasn’t. A few days ago, I paid attention to the symptoms in a moment of full presence while talking to a cherished friend who would recognize herself over the phone. I was in awe when realizing all symptoms except for the snapping jaw — a problem also explained by the misalignment of the upper and lower parts according to the osteopath — disappeared.
I had to go through hell so that I could slow down and grant my feelings some space instead of instantly regulating them. Once again, I needed to learn my lesson the hard way!
My lost baby Mustache soul has been comforting me indirectlyMustache has a biological sibling. His name is Zorro. They were too sick when I found them. I fostered them for three months before deciding to permanently adopt them. They were very close, playing or snuggling all the time. Mustache loved to sleep on my arm and jump on my shoulders. Zorro’s favorite spot, on the other hand, has always been my thighs whenever I’m at the toilet!
My guess is that Zorro misses his brother which breaks my heart. Appealingly, he started literally running to sleep on my arm when Mustache went missing. I thought his new behavior stemmed from his emotional state. It wasn’t until a few days ago that I paused for a moment before feeling overwhelmed by the mind-blowing awareness.
For two weeks, my baby’s soul had been gently watching over and comforting me through Zorro. It was as if Mustache was saying:
I’m here Momma… I want you to know that you did your very best and that I’ll cherish every moment we spent together until our souls will meet again!
Courtesy of the author: Mustache to the left and Zorro to the right!GratitudeAs usual, I want to thank all of you, dear readers, who decided to stop by and give this piece some of your time.
More specifically, I would love to send my deepest gratitude to all my fellow writers and soul friends who showered me with their genuine love; thus making healing my shuttered heart way easier…
You are precious and the epitome of this mesmerizing song by the talented Chrissy Metz!
Gayle Kurtzer-MeyersJoseph LieunghClaire RaymondSam W.Josie ElBiryKerstin KrauseMichele MaizeKim McKinneyJan VajdaHollie Petit, Ph.D.Shameem AnwarCarmellitaMaria RattrayRandall SnyderEzra LeónKimberly J FitzgeraldSherry McGuinnGeorge Blue Kelly Bridget WebberJessy AnthonyKatie MichaelsonYana BostongirlKen HolstenJohn O’NeillMelissa GrayAmanda LindseyRandy ShinglerWendy A ChavezMukundarajan V NA special thank you goes to
DL Nemeril for her generous donation to kindly support the endless expenses even though it eventually didn’t work out because of technical issues. We are grateful for the nurturing intention!
Empathy is a fundamental human trait. To a large extent, it’s what makes us human. (Scientists say empathy can be impaired by narcissism or sociopathy). We all know this is important, and we all know we need more of it. Here are six ways we can improve our abilities related to empathy.
In my childhood, I came across a story of a master exploring the desert with his camel, and at night, he slept in a tent while the camel was outside. The camel gradually managed to make a passage of his head inside the tent and warm itself owing to the cold. The master felt pity for it. Gradually the camel entered its whole body and forced the master to get out of the tent. The message is clear that if you show pity to one who is unable to realize what is exactly pity and empathy, the fallout will be disasters. I guess, there is needed to be an understanding about the matching of wavelength and if we ignore it, it is obvious that we have to pay the price of it.
Once in my own known domain, I allowed a person to explore. He assured me of a due package and asked me to help him in order to achieve his desired goal. He simply hoodwinked me. As a superior to me, I extended my all possible support to comply his assignment, where he promised me with a due package along with a certain portfolio to facilitate him to achieve his aspiration. The moment he got momentum regarding the concerned project, he first oust me from the project only to take the credit of the successful completion of the project. Besides the rampant corruption he exercised utterly flummoxed me. I could not envisage how low a man can be just to assert his mundane goal!
Thereafter I deliberately resigned from the concerned project, rather he forced me to resign through his dirty politics of nepotism. When I lodged a complaint regarding him to the superior, surprisingly they endorsed him instead of me. I felt sheerly humiliated and finally withdrew from the concerned project.
The inference I drew from the above incident, the constraints of a camel comparing to humane which humans alone perhaps possess! On the contrary, humans too possess a mind to think, perceive, and have the capacity to cause harm to their own fraternity, unlike any other creatures.
I evidently realize thereafter, the gravity of a tent in a desert in the cold night and what measures are needed to be taken for a human to adapt and suffice. If we are only governed by emotions then we are surely beckoning our own jeopardy. Besides, I strongly believe that managers, who are focused only on instant gain, they will surely not be able to sustain for a longer period and their success are ephemeral which they could experience within their tenure of assignment evidently.
I wonder about the consequence being emerged after the rising Sun to emerge in the horizon. How the master eventually behaved with his pet companion and how the camel ultimately sustain! Whether they maintained a status quo or separated from each other perpetually for the rest of their voyage in the desert.
Humans can write stories, but the camel cannot. Human only possesses vengeance, grudge, and ecstasy, while the camel only craves to survive by following the command of its master. It does possess the duality of attack and defense or any nefarious ploy just to sustain and survive.
We poor humans sometimes are forced to adhere to a policy being crafted by the managers just only to eke out like camel and our masters, who usually claimed as managers with their skill and self-admired inclinations make our life miserable. Are they truly admired as leaders? They too are blind like the master of the said camel, unable to fathom the potential of a camel, who actually navigates him in the desert. They are just focused on their only goal to seek profits of their own as well as for their organizations, hardly bothering the workforce who are the main driving force for their wheels of profits, and ignoring them will only hasten the process of scripting their own obituary. They only remain as a dead or decaying element in the pages of human history!
Living your life fully regulated and balanced is like toasting a perfect piece of toast (whatever that looks like to you).
When we envision our perfect life we have a picture that goes along with it. Hopefully, that picture is fully in color and sharp and clear. One that gives you a wonderful feeling inside.
The same can be said about your ideal piece of toast (whatever type you prefer, including gluten-free products) and what it looks and smells like as you imagine that picture inside your mind. (sub-modalities aside)
The reason I am sharing this comparison is because of the way the toaster oven component of my stove works.
I have a two-door oven with the top section being smaller for smaller items and it has a toast mode that we use in the mornings (and to reheat pizza, but that’s for another post) to make our toast. Push the “toast” button, it tells you that four minutes is the right amount of time, and it sets the right combination of oven temp and broiler timing.
If you put your toast in and it is a cold stove, the settings work fine and you get an almost perfect piece of toast every time. However, if the oven was used before and it is still warm inside then you will burn your toast almost every time. Unless you recognize the situation and adjust your settings accordingly.
The same can be said about our emotional response to situations.
I use the example of road rage when I talk about this with my clients. Imagine you are driving down the road and someone doesn’t use their turn signal or maybe they won’t let you merge in the lane as you need to. Usually, this isn’t an overly dangerous situation and one that most people deal with daily and just move on with their journey.
There are those that get infuriated with these behaviors and blow their top. The reason they get so upset is usually not the event itself so much as what this event brings up within them. It usually connects them to something that is a bigger issue in their lives and this event becomes a symbol of that issue.
Similar to that warm oven that burns the toast.
As we clear out those negative emotions (anger in this case) and also process and deal with any limiting beliefs from the past, then we can look at each situation with clear eyes and see it for what it is.
Living our lives regulated and balanced, invoking that ideal picture and feelings of living the life we desire. Just like that perfect piece of toast.
As you may have guessed, Humor is very important to me and one of my highest values in work and personal life.
I also use metaphors and analogies a fair amount since our unconscious mind works in symbols and stories and I find people can make the biggest shifts within the two.
To step into a lasting relationship and feel the peace that comes along with it. To find the one you’re destined to be with.
I thought that you died out
Few vows are engraved in stone
My heart had been blacked out
But you felt like home
So tell me what you want, tell me what you need
Let me pay you back, don’t mind rolling up my sleeves
I’m destined to be with you
Show me all your scars, show me what you’ve seen
We can start again, start until we feel washed clean
I’m destined to be with you
A vision with soft eyes,
An angel with hands to touch
I’ve used up my war cries
Found peace in your love
So tell me what you want, tell me what you need
Let me pay you back, don’t mind rolling up my sleeves
I’m destined to be with you
Show me all your scars, show me what you’ve seen
We can start again, start until we feel washed clean
I’m destined to be with you
I can feel the love, and I can see the ring
It was more than I was envisioning
So tell me what you want, tell me what you need
Let me pay you back, don’t mind rolling up my sleeves
I’m destined to be with you
Show me all your scars, show me what you’ve seen
We can start again, start until we feel washed clean
I’m destined to be with you
Mark O’Brien read The Paraclete and found meaning in it. I explained it’s from my forthcoming The Shaman (due out September 2023) and is based on my training as Psychopomp. I asked if he’d like to see more excerpts specifically dealing with psychopompery and he did, so I offer the following. I’ll share more (four total) if there’s interest. This piece, DeathSong, is when the protagonist is a child. The Paraclete comes much later in the novel when the protagonist is mid-30s.
Enjoy.
____________________
DeathSong
“You promised.”
“Gio.”
“You said you’d never leave me.”
“Gio.”
“I won’t do it.”
“Gio.”
I turn my back. I won’t face him. I won’t I won’t I won’t.
I feel his arms encircle me, hear his voice inside me. “Do you feel me, Gio?”
I don’t answer.
“Gio.”
“No, I don’t feel you.”
He withdraws. The energy that cradled me, rescued me, taught me, pulls back.
I spin, reach out, fall into his arms. “No, Buppa. No. Don’t go, Buppa. Don’t die. I need you. I don’t want to go home.”
He holds me against him. I feel his heart, not strong. His arms are weak. Still he holds me. I hear his breath, smell his clove aftershave. He rubs his beard stubble against my forehead, he sings an old song. I see that thing made of sound. It hovers, sees me watching, flutters in the light, fades away.
Inside I hear. “Am I with you now, Gio?”
“Yes, Buppa. Yes.”
He taps my chest. “As long as you keep me here, I’ll never leave you. Remember, this is what is real. Do you understand, Gio?”
I sob. “This instance…” Another sob. My stomach aches with my tears. “…of time.”
“I’ve done all I can here, Gio. I’ve learned all I can learn. Is it right for me to stay?”
“Yes.”
He chuckles. His chest rattles. “Gio.”
“No.”
Grandpa’s death shocks no one. Every morning he stares into his still calloused, once powerful hands. He holds Grandma and holds me. “Six more days.” “Five more days.” “Four more days.”
Each day, quiet, patient. “Come sing with me. Start with your hands, here.” He places my hands on his chest, over his heart. It misses a beat. Then strong. Then another. Then strong.
I learn his song, his rhythm, his path. To guide him. To help him. To find his last door. To shape the universe he travels to.
In seven days.
“Will I know everyone’s DeathSong?”
“Yes.”
“I don’t want to know everyone’s DeathSong.”
“Remember, Gio, always look for the good.”
I don’t want to. “I will.”
“Promise?”
“Yes.”
Today he says nothing. Grandma lifts me in her arms and takes me to Mrs. Gianelli’s.
Grandma holds me close. I feel her heart, hear her breaths. She kisses me. “Yes, Gio. Yes.”
She whispers to Mrs. Gianelli who takes me from Grandma and cradles my head against her chest. Grandma rushes out. Mrs. Gianelli speaks Italian to Mr. Gianelli, but their dialect, not Sicilian. I know some words, not all.
Mr. Gianelli runs into their kitchen, picks up their phone, calls the police.
Mrs. Gianelli asks if I’d like some latte e bustaciotti, milk and cookies. Mr. Gianelli goes to our other neighbors. People gather. Some go in our house.
A siren.
An ambulance comes to our home. Mrs. Gianelli looks out the window. I slide off the kitchen chair and out the back, through Grandpa’s garden. His roses, his morning glories, his lillies, all his flowers, his peppers, tomatoes, squash, none face the sun.
They look to our house.
The bees are gathered on the outside of their hives. They’re not buzzing, their wings unmoving. The hives are silent.
I go inside. Men are rushing around Grandpa. They put him on a rolling bed.
He lifts his head, smiles, touches his palms to mine.
My hands burn. Itch.
A final gift, my legacy, the marks I bear.
He breathes and the house shakes. It’s already mourning.
Inside me, Grandpa’s voice. “Sing my song, Gio. Open the door for me.”
I breathe with him, our breaths make a bridge for him to cross.
The ambulance people want to hurry. Grandpa makes them stop.
He takes my hands and places them on his chest, over his heart. My two small hands in his. I feel him there.
Inside, his voice. “Never raise your hands in anger, Gio. Never hurt or harm others with what you’ve learned.”
“Yes, Buppa.”
“Now, Gio. Sing for me now.”
I sing his song. Doors open in the sky.
My spirit-body moves from me. His waits. Something sails above us, like waves on the ocean clothed in gray.
“Who is that, Buppa?”
“Another friend. Take me to it. It will help me the rest of the way.”
“I want to go with you, Buppa?”
“No, Gio. Not yet. Not for a long while. But I’ll be waiting. Don’t worry. And I’ll have peaches for you when you get there.”
I help him. Grandpa’s friend spreads huge wings that shed gray waters, a weathered sail fluttering on the horizon.
Grandpa smiles. It takes Grandpa’s hand from me.
The ocean’s robes turn from gray to white at Grandpa’s touch. They flow over him leaving the creature’s wings free, catching the wind, lifting.
Grandpa is gone.
I wave goodbye.
Not all lessons are joyful.
There were two farms in the mountains, one was owned by an older couple, Marv and Maeve, and the other was owned by a young single man Nils. Nils was a farmer who grew mostly root vegetables, but some summer wheat and greens. Marv was more woodcutter and hunter than farmer “My farm grows rocks” Marv said. The old man cut trees and hunted game which he peddler-packed to the other mountain farms.
Nils owned three nanny goats, and two milk-producing cows and he made cheese. He had six hens, but no rooster. He had a young strong mule who would pull a plow if you “feed him carrots and sweet talk him just right.”
The neighbors bartered and shared their bounty. Nils took Marv’s wood and game in exchange for milk, eggs, and cheese. Nils plowed Marv’s little plot of “rocks and the odd potato” because the mule wouldn’t work for Marv. “Ya just gotta talk him sweeter,” Nils laughed.
Time went on as time does. Marv and Nils would sip a drink together of an evening. And engage in the joy of working men – complaining, Marv about the weight of his pack and the “hills growing bigger each year,” and Nils about the “endlessness of it all,” and “ always smelling like cheese.” Some winter evenings Marv and Nils would dream-talk about “getting away from it all.”
“There’s some old-growth oak, and a stand of walnut in the wood. We could cut it and use your wagon and mule and get it to market by the river. It’d bring enough to move where it’s warmer. That hardwood’s worth a lot!”
“Foolish talk, old man,”. sniped Maeve. “The only way we’re getting’ away from it all is in a box.”
“Still, warmer sounds nice,” dreamed Nils. Might could find me a wife..”
Next day everyone would go back to working. Next evening might find them sipping, complaining and dreaming again.
One day Marv died. Maeve grieved, but she was practical. She would live with her daughter “three hills away.” She offered to sell Nils the farm. Nils had no money, but he hatched an idea.
“Do you know where that hardwood is that Marv was always on about?” He asked.
“Sure do.” said Maeve.
“If you’d trade me that for all the chickens, cows, and goats, I could cut it and take it to the market by the river like Marv always said.”
“Cutting and hauling that much wood is no easy job, Nils. Seems like I’d get the better end of that deal.”
“Seems fair to me, Maeve. I’m going down that river, somewhere warmer, find me a wife and start living the life!”
They agreed and the next day Maeve took Nils to the stands of oak and walnut and soon Nils began work.
He selected each tree to maximize board feet for the mill, prizing tall and straight trees with few lower limbs. He trimmed the limbs of each felled tree and cut it to the maximum length to fit the wagon. Working with the mule he hauled the logs out from the woods and stacked them. Nils built a frame to hoist each tree into the wagon. Hard work, but Nils had “a strong back and a good head for figuring things out,” (even if he did say so himself.
Oak and walnut are hard woods and Nils spent as much time sharpening his axe as he did cutting. Eight days later he had enough cut to begin to load the wagon.
Nils quickly realized,” this wagon is not going to handle this load.” So he reinforced the axle and bed of the wagon, making beams and planks from limbs he had trimmed.. He loaded the logs using the frame and rope. ”Not really a one-man job” he thought missing Marv. It was slow hard work and Nils slept well every night lulling himself to sleep saying “that hardwood’s worth a lot.”
Finally at the end of the twelfth day Nils was done. He tied the logs off with the best rope he had He boarded up his house, “’cause I ain’t coming back here.,” and he went to sleep with saying Marv’s mantra about the value of the hardwood.
The next morning Nils fed and hitched the mule and started off.
The mule got used to the load, hard pulling up and not getting pushed over going down. Nils and the mule had an agreement, carrots, and sweettalk for the mule and hardwood that was worth a lot for Nils.. They made progress and Nils was sure they’d be at market in two days. He said out loud. “That hardwood’s worth a lot.”
At the crossroads there were about fifteen men dressed in matching green-brown clothes. Nils wasn’t sure if they were soldiers or just government workers.. Some carried weapons; most had tools for digging or building. One with grey hair held up his hand. Nils slowed to a stop.
“Where are you going, son?”
“I’m Nils. And I’m going to the mill by the river.”
“That’s a long way son -ah Nils. Is this your wagon and mule.”
“Yes, sir.”
“You know, Nils, we’re working four hills east of here and we could sure use a rig like this wagon and mule. How much would you take for it all wagon and mule?”
‘Begging your pardon, sir, but the mule and wagon ain’t for sale, Y’ see, I’m taking these logs to market. . .”
The man held up his hand, “What if I was to offer you… “ The man offered a price five times what a mule and wagon would go for in these parts. Nils thought “that is a lot of money.”
“What about my hardwood?” Nils asked.
“Son, we don’t want your wood.” The older man said and some of the other men laughed.
“I’m sorry then. That hardwood is worth a lot at the market. I intend to sell it. You could send a man with me and I could sell him the rig after I’m done and he could bring it back.”
“That’s good thinking son, but we don’t have time for that. How much did you figure on selling that wood for?
Nils named a figure above the range that Marv had given him.
“What if I was to pay you what I said for the rig and give you what you said you’d get for the wood?”
Nils grabbed the back of his neck and then scratched behind his ear. “Well, I don’t know. That hardwood’s worth a lot,” he said.
“Son, we could really use that wagon and mule so I’ll tell you what I’ll do. I’ll pay the amount we agreed for the mule and wagon and one and a half times what you said you’d sell the wood for at market.”
This was too good to pass up. “Do you have that much money with you?” Nils asked fully expecting Grayhair to say “No, but we’ll get it to you” or some such bamboozlement, but the man reached in his satchel and counted out the money.
Nils scooped it up and counted it. Suddenly one of the other men cut the rope and the fifteen men had unloaded the logs and stacked them beside the road almost before Nls had put the money away. “What about the wood?” Nils asked. “You know, that hardwood’s worth a lot, maybe you could take it and sell it.”
“Son, I told you we don’t want your wood. We need the wagon to carry the men to where we are working and no one there wants wood anyway.”
Nils started to object, “ but it’s worth… .”
“Yeah, yeah – Listen, if you stay here maybe someone will come buy it.” With that the men loaded themselves into the wagon. Nils gave Grayhair carrots and told about sweet talk and they went over the hill.
Nils stayed with the wood waiting to see if anyone came along. No one came, As it got dark he cut a For Sale sign into the top log with his knife with an arrow toward his farm
He went back the next day and waited. No one came and he hiked home muttering “That hardwoods worth a lot.”
The third morning it had snowed and he ran to the crossroads to brush off the wood so a buyer could see it and his sign. Three people passed that day. They listened to the story, but no one bought the wood.
One little girl asked him, “Didn’t you already sell it, and aren’t you going down the river where it is warm and find a wife and start living the life?” Her father hustled her away saying “Hope you sell it, Nils. That hardwood’s worth a lot.” Nils thought about it and resolved to come back tomorrow.
I hope that Nils eventually made it “down the river where it is warm, and found a wife and is living the life.” Maybe someone came along with a wagon and bought his hardwood, because, as we’re aware, it was worth a lot.
His story has me thinking about my “hardwood,” all the woulda, shoulda, coulda thoughts that slowed my life progress.
What about your wood? You know, “that hardwood’s worth a lot.”
Have you ever thought about how much information we take in throughout our day? Radio broadcasts, television shows, information shared verbally, words in print, images, and songs, all these sources continue to play in our heads hours after we encounter them.
As we take a moment to eat dinner, relax at the end of the day or lie in bed, our minds continually process all the input from our day. Such mental clutter leaves us feeling unsettled consciously and subconsciously.
Often, the activities we pick to help us to relax or decompress only add to the clutter within. For instance, watching television, reading a book, or talking to a friend or spouse only has us taking in more information.
I encourage you to be aware of the above and instead allow yourself to make time to draw your attention inward to the sensations of the breath in our bodies, slowing our mental activity enough that our minds begin to settle. Take a walk, do some stretching or yoga, practice deep breathing exercises, or stare at the night sky and stars.
The key is to draw your attention away from mental activity. Once you are mentally relaxed, you can begin the process of clearing the mind of all its clutter. Daily setting aside time to clear the mind over time can become second nature, with less effort. The mind becomes more open and receptive to new experiences, new information because it is free of yesterday’s clutter.
I encourage you to give it a try this week!
I don’t know what we’re doing. I truly don’t.Illegal aliens are streaming across the southern border, accompanied by thugs, drugs, and bugs, of which the coronavirus is likely the least. We do nothing. And we couldn’t care less.
Please don’t tell me it’s a humanitarian issue. It’s not. There’s nothing humanitarian or humane about surrendering a nation’s sovereignty, squandering its resources, endangering its citizens, or diluting its opportunities in the interest of padding a dependent voter base. Nothing.
What’s that? Things are no different from the way they’ve always been? I see. Well, unless you’re capable of convincing sharks to buy teeth, Eskimos to buy ice cubes, or politicians to buy honesty and integrity, that’s going to be a pretty tough sell.
Please bear in mind that Exhibits A and B in the hyperlinks below are from NBC and CNN, respectively — mainstream media outlets, to be sure. They’re not from The American Spectator, The National Review, Real Clear Politics, Reason, City Journal, Quillette, The Daily Wire, The Washington Times, The Washington Examiner, The New York Post, Fox News, One America News Network, Newsmax, Judicial Watch, The Epoch Times, The Hill, Breitbart News, The Blaze, The Gateway Pundit, Red State, The Heritage Foundation, NewsBusters, The Federalist, PJ Media, American Thinker, FreedomWorks, Power Line, or any other sources likely to be dismissed, disregarded, shadow banned, or canceled outright for being fake news, extremist, inflammatory, biased, racist, homophobic, transphobic, or — worst of all — conservative.
And please bear in mind that Exhibit C is from the Pew Research Center, a nonpartisan think tank that takes no policy positions:
Exhibit A
Exhibit B
Exhibit C
As we concede our sovereignty to naïveté, utopian idealism, and self-destructive indifference, we can count it among the myriad things we’ve forgotten, neglected to learn from history, or chosen to ignore.
A nation that cannot control its borders is not a nation. (Ronald Reagan)
And the immigration issue is just one piece of a very large and profoundly perverse puzzle.
Guess Where the Buck Stops
I read a post on Vox in March of last year. It was entitled, “How Putin became the victim of his own lies”. It’s an interview with Brian Klaas, a politics professor at University College London. During the interview, Klaas said this about the United States:
There’s something deeply dysfunctional about American society right now. People are financially and electorally rewarded for lying to their voters. We can come up with every possible institutional change that you can imagine to revive our democracy, but nothing will matter unless we solve this problem with our society.
He’s right, of course. The people whom we’re financially and electorally rewarding for lying to us constitute just one side of the equation. The other side of the equation is us. We’re letting ourselves be lied to. We’re letting ourselves be fed false narratives. We’re refusing to look more deeply, to ask more questions, to demand the return of our liberties, to reduce the massive size and waste of government, to hold accountable the people we elect to represent our interests. We’re turning our backs on what was once a bold, magnificent experiment in self-government to be governed by corrupt, self-serving, double-dealing, career politicians who manage to become millionaires while holding ostensible public-service offices without ever having to account for a dollar of their own money, let alone ours. And guess who’s on the hook for all of it.
The question in the title of this post doesn’t matter. It can be considered purely rhetorical because we’re doing both. And we didn’t have to do either.
The only thing sadder than watching a nation die is watching a nation kill itself.
The first time Robin had sat upon the back of Her Royal Highness Queen of Swans was a truly surreal experience. Wings so gently swaying enabling Her Majesty to be caressed by a light breeze.
Such was the comfort afforded him, Robin slept much of the time. He did enjoy views above the River Itchen (Poet Keats’s favorite riverside walk and nearby Water Meadows, but on awakening he thought he had been dreaming, such was the graceful elevation provided by Her Majesty and the views, beautiful. Totally different perspective, much higher than his usual level, close
to ground level.
This second experience would take him along a path of limitless imagination and infinity of fantasy and heart, accelerated by supremely positive vibes.
His good friend the Blackbird once again escorted him to the river where Her Majesty Queen of Swans ruled. Her Majesty greeted Robin in a manner warm, with a slight tint of secretive expectation in her eyes. Settling on the swan’s back and as previously, held onto a white feather.
Her Majesty ensured Robin was prepared for elevation to another dimension. Energy entered her royal wings. Flying from the river over treetops took no time at all. In reality, literally in an instant.
Unlike his previous experience, Robin was awake, alert, and open to all sights and senses.
Her Majesty flew to the right, leaning over, offering Robin a most spectacular view. A glistening river, treetop branches seemingly waiving goodbye. They ascended further toward fluffy clouds; signaling a farewell to the confines of earthly existence.
Through clouds so beautiful, the sun shining creating a most magical scene the sun engaged in a form of solar synergy.
Higher still, Robin viewing clouds from above. Her Highness projected confidence and promise of infinite joy. Feathers glowed so bright and white, imaginary rainbows blessed Robin’s eyes. Planet Earth left behind Moon glowed in the darkened sky.
Thoughts of everyday life flowed through his mind but disappeared on being part of the expanding Universe.
Once frightened of modest heights; now welcoming infinity. Her Highness asked what he felt. Robin instantly stated awe and ecstasy.
Speed irrelevant velocity infinite.
Freedom from solar influence projected them to stars’ formations of fantasy; Gemini, Scorpio, Taurus, and more.
Senses came alive; invigorated. Feeling a high degree of peace and kindness where every being lived a natural life in a gentle manner.
Passing galaxies, unlimited energy heralding a new life, flying through space; time irrelevant.
Suddenly, in an instant (although ‘instant’ is academic as time is irrelevant) other swans appeared; exchanges of love and mutual empathy, togetherness, and peace. Such a sight brought joy to Robin’s heart.
“What say you, Robin?” Robin was aghast, lost for words but able to say “This is a parallel Universe, but one of peace, serenity, and kindness. You bless me with this tour of life beyond Earth’s horizon.”
Suddenly, with no feeling of movement, Her Majesty settles upon the river. To Robin, everything was the same as when they left the surface. Ducks in exactly the same position; time of day unchanged. Should a clock have been feasible, they had flown off at 11.15 and returned at 11.15.
Robin was so grateful and sensed connectivity with her Royal Highness Queen if Swans he would have thought it were a dream had he not been holding a second feather in his claws.
Such is the mystery of life beyond. Parallel
The question of why some people and nations make it in life and advance whereas other nations do not overwhelm my mind.My thinking led me to the conclusion this is because developed nations respect the Law of Polarity and allow things to come in pairs. Denying this fact leads to living in a survival mode with all its ill consequences.
Countries that have democracy to express different and opposing opinions allow for the pairing to exist. There is no idea or opinion without opposing ones. The freedom to express those views is in keeping with the law of the universe that everything comes in pairs. Night and day, summer and winter, life-death and ups-downs are examples of the law of pairings. There is always a peak and a trough.
The tension that the opposites create serves as the creative energy to seek more knowledge. This in turn leads to the advancement of nations.
Nations that have no democracy suffer from confirmation bias and groupthink. They remain in their comfort zones and hardly anything changes. They live in survival mode with all its challenges and stress.
Living in survival mode leads to broken heart syndrome. People with broken heart syndrome may have sudden chest pain or think they are having a heart attack as Mayo Clinic defines it. Living in such a condition precludes advancement and creative thinking and moving forward.
What applies to nations applies at all scales. From the individual. To the family, community, and society this is true.
Violating the law of nature is violating life and progress.
“And then, it happened. Up from the small grassy hill to her right, delicate winged creatures appeared, flying together, in mystical motion”
Join the little girl as she soars and surrounds herself with magical mayhem in search of her imagination!
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Happy
Free
Let that
My heart
Be – A
Glance
Fixating
On a cloud
Peace and
Beauty to
Calm me
When life
Gets loud
A heart
That sees
Beyond
A doubt
Just what
This life
Is all-out
If the Sun spews water it’ll change its core into mire.
It is true people control words. Sounds like a horror fantasy, a dystopian illusion, an unreality, but it exists.
Words express feeling, materialize inner thoughts, and furthermore put in print for our pleasure and imagination to wonder beyond physical expectations. When prescribed in prompts it either adds or takes away the value of one’s potential. I remember being in reading class in grade school when the teacher issued homework, just to test our comprehension skills in a race to explain in front of the class what we’d read. Almost always I ended up being the outcast the one who is either called up first to present my findings, like a clown performing for a circus, or the devil who contests the teachings of sacred textbooks.
My understanding of the texts would never go along with what’s being taught. The majority of my classmates would agree with the teacher’s pedagogy, even though outside of the realm of the classroom they found it interesting to analyze the text differently. Challenging the teacher’s expectations and standards was unheard of. Free-thinking for the most part was apprehended according to the schools’ policy, in other words how teachers taught students determined if they’d passed.
I learned not to always listen to narratives when it comes to a text that requires an in-depth interpretation. I don’t know how everyone else feels about ChatGPT, but A.I. speaking for you is no different than school policy recommending teachers to teach Columbus was the first to discover America. And yet you can utilize A.I. to your advantage as long as laziness doesn’t massage your mental into delusions.
Although at one time the Sun evolved around the Earth: That’s how the majority viewed it, until Galileo came along and challenged the concept. He was persecuted for his gross implications. Both the majority and Galileo comprehended something profound but at the same time looked over: the Sun and Earth complement each other.
As most of you know from reading my biography that not only am I retired from Law Enforcement, but I am also a devout Catholic who believes deeply in my faith. I have written many articles for BizCatalyst 360°, and I am so grateful, (as I am sure many who write for this great website are), where one can express what is on their mind. I have been studying about Angels and Spiritual Warfare for some time. As a result, I have come to understand that not only is Satan real, but so are Angels, which we need to take seriously. I will begin submitting articles related to my faith, (not because I am Catholic), but because God wants those who may not believe to have the chance to do so through my articles. I welcome challenges and questions, directed in a humble way to whatever I write. Today I want to relate a story that happened to me while on patrol one night, shortly before heading into the station at the end of my shift.
I worked a shift called dog watch; it was from 3 p.m. to 11 p.m. My shift kept me busy through the night, and frankly, I was tired, not feeling great, and wanted to get home to my daughter and son. As I came to the intersection to make a turn and head in, the light turned red and I waited, and as I looked over, a car zoomed through the intersection, at a high rate of speed. Well, I looked over to the person sitting in the car as they had witnessed the same thing, and their look was “Well, are you going to do anything about that”? I knew that I was just a few minutes away from ending my shift but the look on the person’s face was not something I could ignore. So, without hesitation, I threw on my overhead rotating lights and went after the vehicle, only to catch up and have it make a U-turn right in front of me.
I followed behind the vehicle, and I noted that there were two people in the car, the driver, and a passenger. As they came back to the intersection they turned and began to enter the freeway on-ramp. I hoped and prayed the driver would pull over before entering the freeway, but no go. To my great thankfulness, he did, and I saw him for a second disappear. I threw on my spotlights, focusing on the driver, and slowly exited my unit.
Suddenly, a feeling came over me as though someone was standing behind me telling me not to approach but to go to the rear of my unit and call for a backup. This feeling of a presence stayed with me until my backup arrived. We approached the car together and ordered the driver and the passenger out one by one and in a safe manner. The stop produced the passenger and driver being under the influence, the driver more so than the passenger, and in the car was open containers and to my surprise, a loaded 38 caliber revolver under the driver’s seat.
When we processed them back at the station, I asked the passenger what the problem was, and he said: his friend has been at sea for 6 months and came home to find his wife in bed with another man. In his rage, he left, started drinking, picked me up and said that if he is stopped, he will kill the officer who comes to his door. So, when he (the driver) disappeared for that split moment, he had done so retrieving the loaded weapon and was holding it to his chest waiting for me to approach. That’s when I felt that presence and I knew it was my guarding angel. I have good instincts, but this goes beyond that. So, if you don’t believe angels are real, I will disagree.
My next article will be on these Spiritual Beings that are given to each one of us the day we are born!
Office politics, workplace politics, organizational politics – I call it high school. Nothing much has changed since the cliques of high school – although today’s clique categories are a bit different, they still include what you recall from your high school, just with different labels.
In high school, cliques are part of social development. In the office or your office, your job and your reputation can be at stake.
Yes, I know that many are now working their job from alternate spaces, however, this information is the same as if you were in an office. All workplaces are political because we are human beings who bring all our baggage, good and bad, into the workplace.
What does one do if you are either new to the game of large offices or still working in that environment?
Set clear boundaries.
Start by staying out of it. Whatever game you do not join, you do not have to play.
Be nice, at all times; be as nice as possible.
Be fair to all you speak to. When someone attempts to engage you in a Gossip Round, simple, non-committal replies are best.
Use lots of ‘Ohs?’ and ‘Ahs’! and ‘Unhuhs’. Really – no one will care and they will move on to the next person who will agree or disagree, therefore getting snagged into a revolt, big or small.
Don’t gossip about anyone in your office, building, or company. It may hurt you on the way up the ladder and send you spinning down quickly.
The best players have the same respect for the receptionists as they have for the CEO, VPs, and other C Suite categories. You never know who’s watching or listening or who is anxious to pass on your words to someone else. Don’t let anything you say bite you in the butt.
Establish your office ‘line in the sand’ and do not engage anyone who wants to play the game of gossip, bullying, or other not-so-nice means.
Be yourself at all times and enjoy yourself as much as possible while you contribute your skills – the ones they pay you for – to your company.
Just so you know, all this craziness can be shared using social media.
Be yourself, be kind, and stop playing games.
Don’t look now, kids. But it just got okay to be real people.
Yes! Psychology Today published an existentially affirming article entitled, “Quit Feeling Guilty About Not Being Present”. Think of it!
This may be all the reassurance you need about the fact that, as a human being, you’re blessed with a memory and the ability to look ahead, to anticipate, to plan, to take steps, and to amend courses as you go:
For years, the gurus of presence, such as Eckhart Tolle and Jon Kabat-Zinn, have said you find joy in the present moment. Thinking about the past or future causes feelings of regret or worry. Their teachings have driven up the popularity of mindfulness and learning how to be here now … they are not practical guides for living moment to moment … judging yourself as inadequate for feeling emotions, reliving past events, and worrying about the future is a waste of energy … Our emotions and thoughts are motivations that either support or subvert our choice to act and must be considered essential to our ethical reasoning.
The bad news is you squandered a lot of time being in the moment. The good news is it’s now okay to beat yourself up for doing that shit.
PPS (Peter Pan Syndrome)
In some ways we’re benefiting — and suffering — from the effects of the so-called New Age movement that started in the early 1970s. So, it shouldn’t be surprising that the self-absorbed hedonism of the alleged counterculture didn’t want us to be looking beyond the ends of our noses, regretting any of the self-indulgent nonsense with which we were so enamored, or looking ahead to a future we couldn’t imagine or didn’t want to imagine because it entailed aging. Maturing wasn’t a subject of very much allure back in those heady days.
Neither was making meaningful decisions or consequential choices. That’s why we preferred the dark lenses of our granny glasses to the much more valuable, fruitful, and constructive lenses of hindsight and foresight that might have helped us — or caused us — to make better decisions sooner and to have a better appreciation for the value of the present, beyond dwelling in it to protect us from reality.
What a drag it is getting old.
Go Ahead, Back Up
Hindsight and foresight aren’t weaknesses or detriments. They’re not preclusions to happiness. They’re abilities. They’re gifts. They enable us to determine courses to happiness and fulfillment. They’re among the reasons we’re human and squirrels are not. Most important, the perceptions we derive from them are unique to each of us.
For example, what you and I experience in the moment of freefall while skydiving may be quite similar. But what I learn from and decide to do after doing it without a parachute will likely be different from what you learn and decide. That’s what’s known in the biz as contributory value:
the value something has due to there being more value in the actual situation in which that thing is present than a situation in which it isn’t but other factors were reorganized to minimize its absence.
If our lives could be richer, happier, more fulfilling, and more rewarding by living in this moment — then this disconnected moment, and then the next disconnected moment, and so on — we wouldn’t have the powers of hindsight and foresight. But we do. We can choose to live our lives without learning from the past and using what we learn in the future. But if we make that choice, we should lower our existential expectations accordingly.
Hindsight, foresight, and our ability to make decisions are some of the aspects and abilities that make us human.
And people are people, too.
A few days ago, I heard a song I hadn’t heard since Bush was President. I was soon smiling on the outside and skipping on the inside. “Happy”. A few minutes later, another song reminded me, “Don’t worry. Be happy.”
Is there a message here?I didn’t get the worry gene and, believe me, I have thanked God many times that he bypassed me with that one! But here’s a confession. Reading the news, listening to the talk, watching clips of current events on instant repeat, and S.o.c.i.a.l. M.e.d.i.a all plant microscopic worry seeds in my mind.
What happens to nurtured seeds? They grow.
My husband bookends his days with the news and sandwiches in an extra dose at noon. (insert rolled eyes) I have access to the intersecting views of world events and diverse agendas that create the perfect storm of conflicting opinions.
It’s important to be informed, but there is no value in fueling uncertainty of what happens next, fear of the unknown, and dread of the future unless you prefer to live without hope.
There is no happy when there is no hope.
Incessant retelling of what should be, what to believe, and what is wrong with the world grows microscopic worry seeds the size of jackfruit, and it creates the perfect environment for unrest and worry.
I can choose a steady stream of life in the minor key or I can play the music of hope and joy into my soul. I can access happy through good things, good thoughts, good experiences, and good news, just like I can access the negative.
About 12 years ago, I started choosing a word for the year, and 5 years ago I began choosing a scripture verse. This year my word is steadfast. My verse is Philippians 4:8-9 Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable—if there is any moral excellence and if there is anything praiseworthy—dwell on these things. Do what you have learned … and the God of peace will be with you.
Is there a message here? I choose happy, and to fill my mind with so much of what is true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, commendable, morally excellent, and praiseworthy, there is no room for worry seeds to germinate.
One thing I know for sure and maybe you believe it too. Stop worrying! It is not serving you.
Don’t worry. Be happy.
An idea isn’t much good if no one knows about it.
A feeling cannot provide comfort if it is not shared.
A story will not inspire another if it is not told.
And you will not add your much-needed value to this world if you spend all of your time trying to work out who you are and what your purpose is, rather than actually being authentically you and doing what really makes you feel alive.
Because that’s how we actually find ourselves and our purpose.
By taking action, each and every day – with good intent, courage, and an open mind and then being aware of how those actions make us feel. An inspired, joyful, and peaceful feeling means you have hit on something true and right for you. An anxious, fearful, and drained feeling means you have hit on something not true nor right for you.
Both are important – one shows you the way, and the other gives you directions when you are lost.
Finding yourself and your purpose, in my humble opinion, does not generally present itself in a eureka moment, it is always within us just waiting for us to allow it to see the light of day, to give ourselves the time and space to understand how we feel in different places, with different people, doing different things and then to start having an honest conversation with ourselves about who we really are and what we should really be doing – no matter what others do or do not think we should be.
This route is by far the best way, to find yourself and your purpose, whilst at the same time creating so much value, for so many others.
The reality is life is much shorter than we actually allow ourselves to believe.
We do not have time to navel gaze, procrastinate, and roam the wilderness waiting for a knight in shining armour to rescue us.
If we can truly open our eyes, and look at ourselves afresh – when we come alive and when we shrivel away, we will clearly see our needs, our values, our purpose, and then we simply need to do more of the stuff that feeds us and less of the stuff that kills us.
And that’s how we start to finally be exactly who we are meant to be.
We are wired for delight
and equipped for pleasure
and so how lovely it is to
witness the ways gladness
can spread across a room
carried along on currents
of luscious laughter and
the contagion of giggles
Our taste inclines itself
toward sweet happiness
which hurries and leaps
into any crack or opening
and blossoms there
while smiles scatter seeds of
blessing in all directions
How exciting to experience
glee as it gallivants along
blowing the lid off the confines
of shoulds and cannots
as surely as the old jack-in-the-box
that finally bursts out of hiding
after being wound
too tight for too long
How delicious it can be to witness
joy jump over or jauntily stroll
around our daily concerns
and difficulties
creating irrepressible waves
of hope and possibility
in its wake
from the heart, mind, and pen of Minx
FedNow, the Federal Reserve’s proposed digital currency, has received much attention lately. While some say it could revolutionize how we pay for goods and services, others worry it could take away American women’s freedom of financial transactions, privacy, and business development opportunities.
One of the main concerns is that FedNow could make monitoring citizens’ spending habits easier, leading to the loss of financial privacy. Additionally, digital currency could give the US government unprecedented control over the economy, allowing them to determine who can access money and what types of transactions are permitted. Another primary concern is that with FedNow, could impose new taxes and fees on transactions.
The reality of FedNow’s structure currently limits women’s financial freedom, as these measures would disproportionately affect them. As well as places burdens on women entrepreneurs, who often face additional challenges in accessing capital and establishing their businesses.
Ultimately, FedNow could compromise American women’s financial freedom and undermine their efforts to achieve economic autonomy. With this in mind, it is crucial for policymakers to carefully consider the potential consequences of a digital currency before proceeding with its implementation. Women must have their voices heard and their concerns considered as we move forward.
By considering the potential risks to American women, we can ensure that FedNow does not become a tool for further limiting their financial freedom. We must work together to ensure this revolutionary technology is implemented in a way that works for all Americans.
The concept of stillness is an integral part of our lives. Meditation, prayer, mindfulness, reflection, and alone time quiet our bodies and minds and help us ease our feelings of anxiety and overwhelm. Though, it is hard to bring ourselves to complete stillness. Because we have learned to rush, do more and do it faster.
Do you remember being a little kid when time seemed to drag, and you always wanted to be older? You couldn’t wait to become a teenager, get your driver’s license or graduate. As we become adults, we long for the slow-moving time of our younger years.
But how could we cultivate slowness when we can’t sit still long enough and breathe?
What is stillness?Stillness refers to a state of physical and mental calmness, tranquility, and absence of movement or noise. It is a state of being where the mind and body are relaxed, and there is a sense of inner peace. We achieve stillness through various practices such as meditation, deep breathing, and mindfulness. It allows us to slow down, disconnect from distractions, and be present at the moment. In stillness, we gain clarity, insight, perspective and access deeper consciousness and inner wisdom.
The simple definition of stillness is to become motionless and silent. I believe there is something deeper to the quality of this innate center of our being. There is something extremely dynamic to the element of stillness. When we get to this state in our bodies and minds, quite extraordinary mechanics can come through in terms of healing and self-regulation.
Within yourself is a stillness and a sanctuary to which you can retreat at any time and be yourself.
― Herman Hesse
Why do we need stillness?Our bodies need to slow down to recharge. And slowing down helps us find our breath as a gateway to the present moment. Additionally, our brain and central nervous system need ease and quiet to repair. The heart of stillness is listening. And when we listen, we can hear what our bodies truly need or ask from us.
That creates an opportunity to connect with our true nature. Where we learn to be more at ease and cultivate more compassion, and by doing that, we may find a better sense of safety in ourselves and our environment.
When we get still, we also give those around us the potential to do the same. Furthermore, accessing our stillness, our true nature, has a ripple effect on the world around us.
I encourage you to give yourself the gift of slowing down today. Make time to practice stillness, as you need to slow down if you would like to speed up. Think about what that means to you.
Slow down to speed up.
With all of the world’s layoffs, economic uncertainty, and technological innovation in artificial intelligence, it’s a complex business environment out there. How should you prepare for the jobs of the future? See more in the visual deep dive below:
In case you didn’t happen to be looking for them, it’s my pleasure to report that the FBI has released its supplemental 2021 hate crime statistics. Whew! I was afraid they’d never be released. Here’s what you missed:
The FBI’s Uniform Crime Reporting (UCR) Program released a 2021 hate crime statistics supplement about bias-motivated incidents throughout the nation … This supplement allows for a more complete representation of reported hate crimes in the US for 2021. Nationally, reported hate crime incidents increased 11.6% from 8,120 in 2020 to 9,065 in 2021.
How about that? Are you relieved? Me, too.
At the same time the FBI was releasing its statistics supplement, an association called Moderate American Dermatologist (MAD) released a study indicating the skin of the average American citizen got 32 percent thinner — from 1,977 micrometers to 1,344.36 micrometers — between 2020 and 2021. Some people interpret no correlation between the FBI and MAD reports. I’m not one of them.
On Further Review …It’s extremely likely the number of hate crimes will continue to go up infinitely, given their history of multiplicity since the first federal hate crime legislation was passed in 1968 during the Johnson administration. And given the number we have now, I wondered why hate crimes had to be supplemented — and supplemented with what? — because we surely have more than enough to go around at this point. So, I looked for a definition of hate crime in the hope that it would resolve my confusion. Here’s what I found.
According to the Overview of Federal Hate Crime Laws, dated April 1, 2022:
Hate, in and of itself, cannot be criminalized. When hate motivates criminal conduct, however, such conduct may be classified as a hate crime—defined by the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) as a “criminal offense against a person or property motivated in whole or in part by an offender’s bias against a race, religion, disability, sexual orientation, ethnicity, gender, or gender identity.” According to the FBI, hate crimes are “traditional offenses like murder, arson, or vandalism with an added element of bias” … The 2021 supplemental release demonstrates the FBI’s commitment to provide meaningful data sets to the American public to reflect a national picture of the hate crime trend.
Meaningful data sets. Right. One man’s substance is another man’s bucket of steam.
Terms, DefinedUnsatisfied by the FBI’s linguistic semi-circular obtuseness, I applied my acute senses of empiricism, deduction, interpretation, and common sense to the problem. Aside from traditional offenses like murder, arson, or vandalism (one man’s tradition is another man’s psychopathy) — and aside from acts motivated by overt manifestations of criminal racial or religious bigotry or intolerance — here’s what I came up with:
If I’m walking down the sidewalk and I happen to pass some gas, that’s a relatively innocuous act (depending on how loud it is and what it smells like). If, on the other hand, I let one rip and say, “I fart in your general direction,” that’s a hate crime.
Facetious? Oh. Sorry. Let me try another example. And I’ll use it to explore the difference, if there is one, between hate, hate crimes, and ignorance:
If a man passes me on the street and calls me a jackass, is that a crime? No. He might be right. If that man passes me on the street and calls me a Shanty Irish Bogtrotter, is that a hate crime? No. It’s ignorance. If that same man burns my house down because he doesn’t want Micks or Harps living in his neighborhood, is that a crime? Yes. In fact, it’s a felony: arson. Is it a hate crime? No. It’s ignorance.
If we consider hate to be a manifestation of ignorance (it is), why do we need subcategories of hate?
It’s Not About CountingI learned a long time ago, we become what we count. If we count hate and crime, we’ll hate more and commit more crimes. If we count hate crimes, we’ll create more hate crimes and commit all of them. Just ask the FBI. So, we might do well to remember this: If the only tool you have is a hate-crime counter, everything is a countable biased grievance.
To put it another way, creating more hate crimes won’t create less hate. We’ve been proving that since 1968, to say nothing of every year that preceded that one.
Come on, people. We can do better — and count better things — than this.
A Robin, Blackbird, and Swan. To dream or not a dreamLittle Robin sitting alone tweeting away to draw attention. Blackbird on a nearby tree, heard Robin’s call for company. Robin was so pleased when Blackbird sat with him; loneliness forgotten, empathy and friendship shone; a shining light and more. They talked about many topics, especially flying around the sky, and seeing treetops from above so high.
“Come fly with me,” Blackbird said. “Join me on a flight so high with me; no risk nor solitude.”
Robin did not like heights, and although never endeavoured, felt happier closer to the ground.
Talking for such a long, long time, they shared their love of Nature and freedom to fly.
Time passed by and Blackbird asked, “Have you ever seen a swan?”
Blackbird had indeed, but not his newfound friend.
“A swan makes you dream of seeing far above and beyond. No fear; just joy of infinite sky.”
They flew together, close to the ground, until a river glinted in their eyes.
“I will introduce you to Her Royal Highness, Queen of Swans. It may feel a little strange, but the Queen of Swans will rest your fear of heights and beyond.”
So friendly, so beautiful, such royal wings. Monarchy of Nature.
“Come sit between my wings, dear Robin. Fear not dream of flying high.”
Apprehension disappeared as Robin sat between the wings.
“Bye bye,” said Robin to his friend Blackbird. Fear replaced; vibes excited.
“Hold onto one of my feathers; ready to dream of sights anew.”
Queen of Swan’s wings spread wide and graceful; neck so long in regal glory.
“Look above, below, and sideways too, young Robin. Infinite landscape new to you. And downwards to the ground so far.”
Her Royal Highness spoke so softly. Happiness blessed Robin anew.
His friend Blackbird stood below waiving, singing, heart aglow.
Robin was in a magical dream or was it real?
Further along the sky, they flew. “Am I dreaming, your Majesty?” asked Robin. Her Highness replied, “Your dream is but real. Reality is a dream come true.”
Eventually, Robin slept, so calm and serene.
Regal Swan did land so gently, water rippling; spreading a wing to the river edge where Robin walked along offered wing to the river bank and thanked Her Majesty the Swan.
“You are welcome”, Swan replied, quietly lifting off to leave, flying as an angel so supreme.
Greeted by Blackbird, his new friend. “What think you of your flight, asked Blackbird?”
“So surreal it was to me that memories will last forever more. Was it a dream or a reality come true? I do believe I was dreaming. Flying atop a Royal Swan challenges reality, where doubt enters the equation. Did it really happen? I must have been dreaming for sure.”
“Robin my friend, you think you were dreaming, but what is held in your little feet?” Robin looked upon his feet. A white feather of the Royal Swan was clear to see.
Was he asleep and dreaming, awakening in another dream?
Lifting a feather to his beak, the scent of Her Regal Majesty blessed his senses. It was so real. But surreal too. Reality caressing his tiny heart.
His friend, Blackbird, had a look in his eyes; a gentle smile. “Whether a dream to you, my friend, her Regal feather will prove your story. You flew the heavens with Her Majesty Queen of Swans.
Dream or reality matters not. A regal white feather tells a story, a fairytale come true.
Ramana Vinjamuri, University of Maryland, Baltimore County
Robots are machines that can sense the environment and use that information to perform an action. You can find them nearly everywhere in industrialized societies today. There are household robots that vacuum floors and warehouse robots that pack and ship goods. Lab robots test hundreds of clinical samples a day. Education robots support teachers by acting as one-on-one tutors, assistants, and discussion facilitators. And medical robotics composed of prosthetic limbs can enable someone to grasp and pick up objects with their thoughts.
Figuring out how humans and robots can collaborate to effectively carry out tasks together is a rapidly growing area of interest to the scientists and engineers that design robots as well as the people who will use them. For successful collaboration between humans and robots, communication is key.
How people communicate with robotsRobots were originally designed to undertake repetitive and mundane tasks and operate exclusively in robot-only zones like factories. Robots have since advanced to work collaboratively with people with new ways to communicate with each other.
Cooperative control is one way to transmit information and messages between a robot and a person. It involves combining human abilities and decision-making with robot speed, accuracy, and strength to accomplish a task.
For example, robots in the agriculture industry can help farmers monitor and harvest crops. A human can control a semi-autonomous vineyard sprayer through a user interface, as opposed to manually spraying their crops or broadly spraying the entire field and risking pesticide overuse.
Robots can also support patients in physical therapy. Patients who had a stroke or spinal cord injury can use robots to practice hand grasping and assisted walking during rehabilitation.
Another form of communication, emotional intelligence perception, involves developing robots that adapt their behaviors based on social interactions with humans. In this approach, the robot detects a person’s emotions when collaborating on a task, assesses their satisfaction, then modifies and improves its execution based on this feedback.
For example, if the robot detects that a physical therapy patient is dissatisfied with a specific rehabilitation activity, it could direct the patient to an alternate activity. Facial expression and body gesture recognition ability are important design considerations for this approach. Recent advances in machine learning can help robots decipher emotional body language and better interact with and perceive humans.
Robots in rehabQuestions like how to make robotic limbs feel more natural and capable of more complex functions like typing and playing musical instruments have yet to be answered.
I am an electrical engineer who studies how the brain controls and communicates with other parts of the body, and my lab investigates in particular how the brain and hand coordinate signals between each other. Our goal is to design technologies like prosthetic and wearable robotic exoskeleton devices that could help improve function for individuals with stroke, spinal cord and traumatic brain injuries.
One approach is through brain-computer interfaces, which use brain signals to communicate between robots and humans. By accessing an individual’s brain signals and providing targeted feedback, this technology can potentially improve recovery time in stroke rehabilitation. Brain-computer interfaces may also help restore some communication abilities and physical manipulation of the environment for patients with motor neuron disorders.
Brain-computer interfaces could allow people to control robotic arms by thought alone.
Ramana Kumar Vinjamuri, CC BY-NDThe future of human-robot interactionEffective integration of robots into human life requires balancing responsibility between people and robots, and designating clear roles for both in different environments.
As robots are increasingly working hand in hand with people, the ethical questions and challenges they pose cannot be ignored. Concerns surrounding privacy, bias and discrimination, security risks and robot morality need to be seriously investigated in order to create a more comfortable, safer and trustworthy world with robots for everyone. Scientists and engineers studying the “dark side” of human-robot interaction are developing guidelines to identify and prevent negative outcomes.
Human-robot interaction has the potential to affect every aspect of daily life. It is the collective responsibility of both the designers and the users to create a human-robot ecosystem that is safe and satisfactory for all.
A photo was replaced to more accurately reflect the work of the author.
Ramana Vinjamuri, Assistant Professor of Computer Science and Electrical Engineering, University of Maryland, Baltimore County
This article is republished from The Conversation under a Creative Commons license. Read the original article.
I shall roll with earth and thunder.
Crest with lightning and rain.
Freeze upon the morning frost.
Seek calm on the distant plain.
I shall decide upon the gratitude.
Let tranquility sink into skin.
Walk along the dandelion grass.
Let this new life form begin.
I shall take away the hardship.
Set aside the grief and pain.
Renew my faith and wisdom
of never to do once again.
I shall trust my inner voice;
let it steer me to the shore.
Where heart shall meet with destiny.
Peace will be found at the core.
I shall tremble at the touch.
Grasp the hug and hold on tight.
Drift to sleep with you in mind.
Wish and dream through day and night.
Fruits I notice hanging in the branches of a tree
Ripen enough to draw my attention with glee
I am instigated with a natural spree
To devour it and satiate my appetite with soul’s which to a nature’s call in glee!
Nature endows us with myriad fruit
Some are nontoxic and enable our body mechanism to soothe
Some are toxic and have potential to take toll of our life
Yet we endorse the half glass filled with water to express out verve and vibe
Not the half empty which may clouded us with negative flavor
Demoralizing our very existence and stature!
I wonder whether our inherent capacity considered as talent
Which largely engulf majority with its influencing by its intriguing potent
We eulogize those who are continuously striving
Serving majority with sincerity and remain agile
Their only motto is to deliver their utmost endeavor for serving to mankind!
Fruits are nature’s products
Inherently having the potential to promote huge ruckus
It is the by product of a tree
Our hunger too a nature’s call to sustain with distinct entity
Trees and living beings complement each other in vociferous
We all creatures exist in nature’s floor with harmony in chorus!
I am confused with talent
Who possess more, whether human or trees and plant
Color, flavor and physical presence
We humans largely allured by nature’s pristine essence
Talent is an abstract entity
Still it plays a significant role to uphold human’s joviality!
Talent or skill we humans own and hone
It is nature that guide us alone
We fail to discriminate
Within us nature configures our physical state
Unless we observe in nature’s floor how rocks erode and roll
Can we invent a wheel to explore galore in nature’s floor
Giving momentum for human civilization to accelerate and roar
Enabling human skills to manifest and proliferate
Talent is too a product where nature plays the mentor’s role to enable humans to be chided!
Gumshoe in his nascent police career developed some very good tried and true techniques while “suiting up” in the station’s locker room. One of Gumshoe’s personal protocols was to take a very deep breath, hold it, and then tighten the Velcro straps on his bullet “resistant” vests.
Civilian note: There is no such animal as a “Bullet-Proof Vest”. Large caliber rifle rounds can penetrate a vest or with their explosive impact, they will cause severe internal trauma. End of story, lights out to eternity. Amen!
The reason that Gumshoe would perform this “deep breath Velcro” ritual was to allow Gumshoe’s lungs to adequately expand and take in oxygen during the high probability of instant physical exertion. Believe it folks, ****happens!
Too tight of a ballistic vest would prevent the sufficient ability to breathe during a foot pursuit; a knock-down drag-out fight as well as other 911 high-stress police adventures.
A too-tight vest would also prevent Gumshoe from taking survival breaths that produce a collective calm during adrenaline-fed challenges.
Now some of you folks may be “a wondering” what in the heck does Velcro has anything to do with tolerance? Gumshoe will set you straight by quoting two notable distinguished figures.
Russian novelist Fyodor Dostoevsky . . .” Tolerance will reach such a level that smart people will be forbidden to think so as not to offend idiots”.
And . . .
Catholic Archbishop Charles Chaput . . . “Evil preaches tolerance until it is dominant, then it seeks to silence good”.
Look around dear readers and you will readily see the clear and present dangers of unfettered tolerance at our doorsteps.
Situational awareness! That’s what Comrade Fyodor and Rev. Charles were talking about.
Gumshoe fervently believes that everyday “salt of the earth” Americans have had their own collective Velcro straps pulled way too tight by leftist, Marxist hands.
God-fearing, Bible-believing, family-loving, law-abiding patriotic Americans need to “breathe free” against these so-called “tolerant” restraints that must be loosened.
Gumshoe says that anyone should never be so “open-minded tolerant” that their brains fall out!
Gumshoe prays that true American values will prevail just as long we still recognize that we are one nation under God.
Well, that’s Gumshoe diatribe for now gentle readers. Always remember to love the ones who love you and try to love the ones who don’t.
Coram Deo!
Hey, there! AmyK here.Today I want to share with you a powerful shift that happened for one of my clients. She’d been telling herself the same story for years – and recently, it was making her miserable. The tipping point was when her daughter said to her, “Mom, you look miserable.”
Watch this video to see how we powerfully shifted her story together.
To helping people make BIG shifts so they can go out and PLAY better.
Hugs,
AmyK
Acknowledgment: A quote from Yogi, Sadaguru’s book ‘Inner Engineering’. A Yogi’s Guide to Joy. A most inspiring book.
When you are naturally joyful you are naturally pleasant with the world around you.
~Sadhaguru Jaggi Vasudev, Yogi and mystic
JOY AND HAPPINESSThe above introductory quote by Sadaguru clearly describes the importance of positivity and related, feelings of joy and happiness.
Joy is a most wonderful emotion, releasing endorphins, enhancing feelings, and increasing awareness.
But what facilitates heart and soul to create such ecstasy?
A happy event or experience fills the heart with happiness.
Do physical or visible elements play a part in recognizing and creating joy, or does spirituality alone signal the heart to glow in ecstasy? It is as though one is enveloped in an almost Divine entity.
As described many, many times, the heart plays a critical role in releasing positive vibes, transporting a person to a higher dimension; a Universe of light and optimism.
Joy is, for example, playing with my two-and-a-half-year-old granddaughter.
Her smiles are infectious. Laughter and happiness and joy she brings.
Raising her arms, signaling she wishes to be picked up for a hug. And hug she does. So lovely.
The look in her eyes as she looks at mine. So special; emotional. Never forgotten.
When she says ‘Grandpa’ for the first time; my heart glows, full of pure joy
The heart speaks louder than words; the Universe, a source of infinite joy.
I left the bar, and I went over to my friends Sue’s house where I thought I’d be safe. I hadn’t thought about the fact her brother worked with Bob and he was there too at her house.
SEE ALL PRIOR PARTS HERE↴
Shattered Innocence (Part 11): Moving On
Well not long after we arrived Bob showed up there and Sue let him in. He proceeded to pick me up by my neck and hold me up against the wall knocking my glasses off me once again this time breaking them. I was screaming at him the best I could to let me down, but he wasn’t budging.
I was afraid he was going to choke me to death. Sue and her brother just stood there watching they didn’t offer help and they didn’t call 911. I was defenseless. I don’t know how long I was in the air, but everything went black, and I must have passed out. Bob was gone when I opened my eyes. Funny somehow, I thought it was my fault he hurt me because I wasn’t woman enough for him. I looked in the mirror and he had given me a black eye from hitting my glasses off my face so hard. Well, I’d show him. That stubbornness of mine had gotten me in trouble before and this wasn’t the first time. I don’t know why but it was a matter of days, and we were getting along again. Until one day at home, he’d been drinking and thought I was seeing someone else while he was out of town. I had not been, but he started to chase me around the house I had no shoes or socks on but the keys to the car were handy I ran outside without my coat got in the car, and peeled out to Carver’s restaurant where my mom was bartending. I felt safe there. Dad showed up from Waterloo mom had called him and sure enough, Bob was waiting in the parking lot for me. He wanted to talk. My dad went outside and had words with him and told him if he ever touched me again, he would wipe the asphalt up with his face. Naturally, Bob was still in his truck and for some stupid reason, I agreed to go out and talk to him. I agreed to go home with him that night he hadn’t laid a hand on me, I just ran from fear knowing what he could do as he had before. We went home and he wanted to have sex. I didn’t want to, but I did, and I was angry at my own body for betraying me and responding to his touch.
These newfound feelings I was experiencing had my body and mind in turmoil and on different mindsets. My brain told me to get away as far as I could, but my body was saying give him another chance after all what more could he do to you? He always wanted to have sex right after we fought without even making up. I don’t know if it was his way of making up or punishing me because I hated the way my body responded to just his slightest touch. I despised myself for not having any control when it came to him. I was in control before him I had to be in control to prevent any further abuse. I’d had enough of that in my life! Things seemed to settle down after that and we started to discuss marriage. I know, not again.
We decided to get married by the justice of the peace. I thought that would change things and make him feel more secure. He was working out of town and was to be home by noon we were getting married at 4.30 with my mom and her girlfriend from work as witnesses. Time kept creeping past noon and I started to think he had backed out of it, but I was wrong he showed up just in time drunk. Well, the wedding went forward short and sweet, and then it was back to the bar for ordure’s and drinks.
We made love that night and it was pleasant and passionate, we managed to not get in a fight on our wedding night.
As days went on, we both continued drinking quite a bit and all he would have to do is give me a dirty look and I would cringe. One evening we went out to dinner and had quite the conversation I told him if he ever lay hand on me again, I’m gone. He told me every relationship went through this and it wouldn’t be better with anyone else. I bought into that perception for a while, but he had quit drinking and that was the main thing, right? I had stopped using all drugs including alcohol. Bob didn’t get high on drugs just drank alcohol and he was willing to quit for us so I thought things would change.
He told me his life story about how when his parents split up his mom didn’t want him, she took his siblings but told him he was going with his dad. Now Bob loved his dad very much and never said a bad word about him however he hated his mother and had resentment towards her deeper that any canyon you could imagine. I thought no wonder he’s the way he is. He hates women and I was right in the middle of it.
He had two tattoos on his hands one said the word LOVE and the Other HATE! He had been in the service in the Korean Conflict at the youthful age of seventeen and he was bearing many scars emotionally from that time in his life as well. He had seen a lot of death and had barely escaped himself several times. So naturally, I started feeling sorry for him for having it so rotten. That he was just misunderstood. And I did make that promise if he didn’t hurt me physically anymore, I wouldn’t leave.
That was the beginning of the mental abuse and dirty looks and threats. But he didn’t touch me so he thought that was okay he was a dry drunk and he might just as well have been drinking. Bob was a roofer when I met him, and he was buff. I mean he had a beautiful tan and muscled out all over. Busy long curly brown hair. And about five ”6.
He got tired of working for his boss one day and came home and said he was going into business for himself, and we were moving to Wisconsin. Oh my God, we were moving to Wisconsin where I don’t know anyone. No family around for support and the thought of that scared me half to death. Meanwhile, I was still wanting a baby of my own, but I kept telling myself not with him you don’t! God only knows how he would be with a child underfoot. I couldn’t put my child through that not what he had done to me. Before we left for Wisconsin, he told me he had lied to me about something, and I thought imagine that well he had told me he was thirty-four. I thought that wasn’t too bad he’s only ten years older than me. Well then, he told me he had switched the numbers around he was forty-three. I was twenty-four at the time I believe. I looked at him and said Well it’s a little late to tell me that now, isn’t it?
So, we packed our bags and headed for Wisconsin where he was going to subcontract for a roofing company there. All the while I’m wondering what’s in store for me now that I would be away from both family and friends. I wasn’t too happy about it no not happy at all.
To Be Continued …
In my daily practice, I have been working with the mantra I will there be light. What does that mean? Let me explain further by sharing something that came out of a conversation later that morning.
I was very grateful for an unexpected affirmation that came out of a call that I was making to organise a session the two of us were running. Sheona made an observation around the shift that they had been witnessing in my presence. One I had felt myself and by voicing it, she gave confirmation of that, an unexpected gift.
If we look at the world with benevolent and loving eyes then we will receive benevolence and love in return. I recognise how difficult this can be. We are all human too and it’s not to deny that we experience pain, betrayal, and suffering! That said it is worth remembering that hurt people hurt people. Let me show you an example of the magic that happens when we can transmute our pain.
Last weekend I had a need to go out and be with other people. And yet no matter what I attempted to organise everything seemed to be falling through. In my spiritual practice that day I was asked to reflect on grievances. At that moment I had a few.
The synchronicity of what happened made me laugh as I was aware of a grievance forming in relation to a group that I belong to. Initially, I felt the anger and injustice and could not get past that. At the same time, I realised that those emotions were causing me pain and made me feel alone. I took a moment to pause and go within to connect to what lay beneath all that: love.
It took a while and then I received a clear message about what to do. It meant allowing for the humanity of another and coming from grace. When I could do that I was able to see a clear path through it all.
I contacted a single friend of mine and asked her if she wanted to go out to a gig run by a bunch of women DJs for International Women’s Day as I knew it wasn’t my hubby’s cup of tea. She said yes and we went. We had an amazing time.
It was so much fun. I made some new friends and got invited to a party in May. Then three of us realised we all had birthdays within a week or two of each other and so we have decided to run a joint birthday party. I could never have expected all that from a night out plus there were some very helpful work opportunities which I may share more about when the time is right.
All this is an example of an everyday miracle and is what happens when we come from a place of love. Compassion and love are muscles that need to be developed and it can be challenging.
If you want some practical tips on how to live in a more compassionate loving way check out the following 10 ideas. Rosemary Lynch and Alain Richard have identified ten “principles” for those seeking to live a spiritual life of nonviolence. Active nonviolence calls us:
- To learn to recognize and respect “the sacred” in every person, including in ourselves, and in every piece of Creation. . . .
- To accept oneself deeply, “who I am” with all my gifts and richness, with all my limitations, errors, failings, and weaknesses, and to realize that I am accepted by God. .
- To recognize that what I resent, and perhaps even detest, in another, comes from my difficulty in admitting that this same reality lives also in me.
- To renounce dualism, the “we-they” mentality (Manicheism). This divides us into “good people/bad people” and allows us to demonize the adversary. It is the root of authoritarian and exclusivist behavior. It generates racism and makes possible conflicts and wars.
- To face fear and to deal with it not mainly with courage but with love.
- To understand and accept that the New Creation, the building up of the Beloved Community is always carried forward with others. It is never a “solo act.”
- To see ourselves as a part of the whole creation to which we foster a relationship of love, not of mastery, remembering that the destruction of our planet is a profoundly spiritual problem, not simply a scientific or technological one. We are one.
- To be ready to suffer, perhaps even with joy, if we believe this will help liberate the Divine in others. This includes the acceptance of our place and moment in history with its trauma, with its ambiguities.
- To be capable of celebration, of joy, when the presence of the Divine has been accepted, and when it has not been to help discover and recognise this fact.
- To slow down, to be patient, planting the seeds of love and forgiveness in our own hearts and in the hearts of those around us. Slowly we will grow in love, compassion and the capacity to forgive.
My mission is to help people with their mental health. Part of that comes with supporting them to see with clarity exactly where they are and helping them gain a vision of what they want in their lives.
At times we are bound to our past and informed by beliefs and values that come from a place where it either served us at the time or it was passed on to us during our formative years and we never questioned where they came from.
Either way, these beliefs and values color our world and how we live within it.
If we are to now consider that we have seen a rise in direct outside influence over the past 10 years then that starts to tell the story of how we are seeing a rise in stress and anxiety in people’s lives.
I realize that there have always been outside sources trying to influence us whether that was to sell us something or to have us consider someone’s point of view as the one and only credible view.
I have always been interested in learning about influence and I have studied it for over the past 25 years. Robert Cialdini, Kevin Hogan, Steven Hassan, et al.
Even NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming-which is the main modality I am trained in along with Hypnosis) has been used as a tool of influence. It is such an effective tool that Steven Hassan stepped away from the community when it was offered to the general public instead of keeping it to trained mental health professionals.
I don’t think it is the tool so much as the intent when it comes to the sources out there.
There are many contributing factors out there that have led us down this path. This is not to bring up anything negative and as I said, it isn’t the tool so much as its use that is the concern.
The amount of information we are exposed to on a daily basis is one of the biggest contributing factors. There is something called the critical faculty of the mind. The definition is “ability to make judgments about what is good or true”. These faculties include thought, imagination, memory, will, and sensation.
Hypnosis works on the basis of pulling down your critical faculty in order to allow the unconscious mind to learn new ways of seeing the world.
This is also true when you watch a movie. If you were to keep your critical faculty up most people wouldn’t believe that Superman exists and can fly and do all the things he does. (as one example). You go into the theater (or your TV or phone- it’s all coming together) and you make an agreement that for the next however long you are in there you will believe what they show you.
This article is not to condemn the internet or to get into politics or even to discuss the news outlets. I would ask that you look at your opinions on these and take a critical look at where your opinions or ideas (are they your own or something you heard?) about these things come from.
I would like to share some ideas on how we can use critical thinking skills as we go through our lives in order for us to be sure our ideas are our own and to look at why others would want us to think their way instead of thinking for ourselves.
Encourage open-mindedness: Keep an open mind and consider different perspectives, even if you don’t agree with them. Listen actively to others and seek out diverse sources of information.
Critical thinking skills: Think about how to evaluate evidence, distinguish fact from opinion, and assess arguments for logical fallacies or inconsistencies. Question assumptions and challenge your own beliefs.
Encourage skepticism: Be skeptical of claims that seem too good to be true or that don’t align with their own observations or experiences. Fact-check information before accepting it as true.
Promote independent research: Seek out multiple sources of information and conduct your own research when possible. Read books, articles, and research studies from a variety of perspectives.
Foster a sense of personal responsibility: Take responsibility for your own beliefs and decisions. Resist pressure from others to conform to certain ideas or beliefs.
Here are some simple things that we can all do in order to promote independent thinking and avoid being swayed by others.
- Fact-check information before sharing it: Before sharing news or information with others, take a few moments to verify that it’s accurate and comes from a reliable source. Encourage others to do the same.
- Encourage civil discourse: When discussing controversial topics, encourage others to listen actively, avoid personal attacks, and stay focused on the issues. Encourage them to seek out diverse perspectives and avoid echo chambers.
- Share resources for critical thinking: Share articles, videos, or other resources that promote critical thinking and skepticism. Encourage others to read books, watch documentaries, or attend lectures that challenge their assumptions.
- Practice active listening: When talking with others, practice active listening by paying attention to what they’re saying, asking questions, and seeking to understand their perspective. Encourage them to do the same.
One of the main ways that undue influence shows up is through the use of rhetoric and thoughts that challenge logical thinking.
If we were all to approach life with a mindset of curiosity and flexible thinking we could be living in a world that isn’t as polarized as it is right now.
We could also see that we are, in fact, one community and all connected.
When you help someone, your self-confidence will also grow… if you do it with a spirit of help rather than to show you are better than someone else.
Mentoring programs for children who are learning to read, do math, learn science, play a musical instrument or a sport are great places to volunteer your time. As you help these children come to a realization that they can do it, your self-esteem will also grow. Look around your area and find a place you can donate time to help someone else. Schools, libraries, and many foundations are set up and in place to help children and all need volunteers.
What every parent needs to know – The World Health Organization (WHO) has revised its Covid vaccine recommendations for healthy. On Tuesday, March 28th, 2023, WHO announced that healthy children under 18 years of age were considered ‘low overall’ to be vaccinated. However, many countries have already determined that children should not be vaccinated. Some of the countries that are far ahead of the WHO in deciding the well-being of children include the following.
2022* Sweden * Germany * Norway * UK Health Security Agency (UKHSA) states children under 12 will not receive the vaccine.
2023Singapore announced it’s not recommended for children, nor are they eligible for additional doses. However, The United States continues to recommend the COVID-19 vaccine “CDC recommends COVID-19 vaccines for everyone ages six months and older, and boosters for everyone ages five years and older if eligible” CDC, 2023. Therefore, it’s essential to understand the state lever requirements for COVID-19 vaccination. According to the Kaiser Family Foundation website, the policies on Parental Consent Laws for COVID-19 Vaccination include the following.
- 49 states require parental consent.
- 4 states require no waiver.
- 4 states give providers the right to waive consent.
- Several states classify a minor difference.
Most states define the ‘age of consent’ as 18. Listed below is the information for states that have exceptions to parental consent.
- Arizona, a child or a doctor can request a vaccine with a court order.
- Arkansas, a provider may waive parental rights.
- District of Columbia allows 11+ to consent without a parent, and healthcare providers may institute additional requirements.
- Idaho, a provider may waive parental rights.
- North Carolina, providers may allow minors ages 16 and 17 to self-consent.
- Oregon allows 15+ to consent without a parent.
- Philadelphia allows 11+ to consent without a parent.
- Rhode Island allows 16+ to consent without a parent.
- San Francisco allows 12+ to consent without a parent.
- South Carolina allows 16+ to consent without a parent.
- Tennessee, a provider may waive parental rights.
- Washington, a provider may waive parental rights.
My only thought after raising two children was. How many children under 18 understand how to read vaccine research and critically think about the consequences of taking the COVID-19 vaccine?
After court, I went back to Wavery to speak with Gary. I asked him why he got the car. He was angry and said because you did not come home. I told him you knew I was going to speak with him. He agreed he knew but not for all night. I told him Tom and I did not do anything because we did not. I did not tell him I was in Tom’s arms all night. We worked through that conversation and things were back to going along nicely.
SEE ALL PRIOR PARTS HERE︎
Shattered Innocence (Part 10): The Divorce
We set a date to be married at The Little Brown Church in Nashua, Iowa. We had mailed the wedding invitations out! This was Gary’s first marriage. So, we went way out on the wedding again. I wore a white wedding gown. Now, I know you’re not supposed to wear white with a second marriage, but I did not care. We had been living together for about 3 months when we got married. I was around twenty-three at the time. Tom and I had managed to stay married for five years in total. My friend Mona was to be the bridesmaid.
On the day of the wedding, I started getting cold feet. I knew this was a big mistake. Gary and I should have just been good friends. I did not love Gary in the way I should be getting married to him. It was too late Gary, and I were already on our way to the church with all those friends and relatives. The little church was packed to the standing room only, I went up onto the stage when I said my vows, I lied, crossed my fingers, and said a silent prayer to God to forgive me! Before I knew it, the pastor said, you may now kiss the bride! Everyone cheered us on as we kissed on the lips. We did not French kiss. After the reception, everyone went home except my friend and her boyfriend, and my brother Bobby, Mona, and her boyfriend came to the house to visit, the next thing I knew her boyfriend pulled out a bunch of cocaine from his pocket and started to run lines. He was a drug dealer. Now Gary didn’t do drugs, not even marijuana. It was late and Gary went to bed. Keep in mind this was our wedding night and I was up all night partying with my brother and my maid of honor. Not a good start to our marriage.
Gary and I were together for about three months and things just weren’t working out. I met a guy in the restaurant, and he asked me to have a drink with him. So, I thought what the heck it’s just a drink. Well one drink led to another and another and yes you guessed it I went back to his Motel room, and we had sex. I never went home that night. Thinking back on it now I realize I was no better than Tom with my behavior. Bob had charisma, about him, and I was attracted to him, and it was the first time I got some pleasure from sex, and I liked it. I went home and told Gary I needed the time to think. Does that sound familiar? Gary got up the next morning, went to his attorneys, filed for divorce, and asked me to sign a piece of paper stating I didn’t want anything. But I did want to keep the Oldsmobile. I didn’t have a car.
So, I found a small apartment. It was a garage converted into a small apartment. And the rent was cheap. I started seeing Bob would regularly travel around doing roofs when he was in town, he would stay with me. The divorce with Gary took three months to complete. So, it was a total of about nine months we were together. I was seeing Bob for about three months when we decided we would move in together. My dad had bought a Trailor in Waverly, so we rented it from him with the option to buy. Things were going well with us, and we started talking about marriage.
Now I don’t know what I was thinking back then either. I was in love with the idea of being married or I felt the only way I knew a man loved me is if they were willing to marry me. Bob was an alcoholic. I was drinking right along with him. He started being abusive when he drank and took it out on me. One night we went out to eat at the bars. We were sitting on the bar stools. Now he was very jealous and accused me of looking at someone at the end of the counter. I wasn’t, but he thought I was. He became incredibly angry and grabbed me by my shirt and pulled me off the bar stool tearing my shirt and knocking my glasses off.
He then grabbed me, pulling me out the door, he had me on the ground and started kicking me and hollering “If you’re a woman you’ll get up!” I couldn’t get up because he kept kicking me. Someone called the police officers, so Bob quit kicking me. He then went over to my car and dumped his leftover food all over my car seat. The Police came and told me they had a safe place I could go. I told them no; I was going to a friend Sue’s house. I didn’t press any charges on him. I just wanted him to leave had I made another terrible choice.
To be continued …
Writing is an act of love
our trail of letters
a path others follow to sort out their own journeys
a breadcrumb trail of words and letters that leads us back to our hearts
sometimes through darkness, rain, and storms
sometimes through bright meadows filled with flowers
– and bees –
but always home to the heart
A gentle reminder this week – that when negative thoughts arise, addressing them rather than suppressing them is best. We have been taught that negative thoughts and feelings are bad. When we repress emotions that we feel are bad, they don’t go away; they just get buried deep within our unconscious mind and become memorized emotional patterns.
I encourage you to allow yourself to honor all thoughts and emotions. You are human, and the human experience includes all types of emotions.
Instead of blocking out thoughts and feelings that we label as negative, allow them instead to be observed. I share with my clients the analogy of watching a show or movie play out on the TV or the movie screen. Try your best to greet the experience with curiosity and non-judgment.
Try not to fear these thoughts and emotions. Remember, they do not define who we are; these thoughts and emotions only indicate our state of mind. You hold the power to change that state of mind. Sometimes it requires patience, love, and compassion. Other times you can be resilient and move through these thoughts and emotions with grace and ease.
One technique I found helpful is saying love and kindness statements to myself, and if it involves another person, I imagine saying these statements to them:
𝘔𝘢𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘣𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘧𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘵𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘦𝘥.
𝘔𝘢𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘣𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘺.
𝘔𝘢𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘣𝘦 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘵𝘩𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘰𝘯𝘨.
𝘔𝘢𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥 𝘱𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘦𝘧𝘶𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦.
Always remember your life is a journey, and we get better at what we practice most.
Elderly and lonely people; perhaps their partners Having passed away, may be shy or reticent, but gathering with other folks for a cup of tea and tea or coffee and cake may create a new dimension to their lives.
The elderly, can feel isolated and eventually ‘disappear’ into themselves. They may not have families nearby to provide empathy and support. The elderly population is growing significantly; most living longer than ever before.
As one of the volunteers at the local community center, I am so pleased to make a difference in elderly folks’ views on engaging with like-minded people. There are many who know each other as friends and gather around one of the tables, ‘talking for England’; a lot of chatting while enjoying delicious cakes, tea, and coffee. A guest attending for the first time can be a little apprehensive, but on noticing the easy, relaxed atmosphere; no obligation, and sensing friendship and kindness, soon become relaxed.
Volunteers welcome them and they choose an appropriate table to sit with fellow guests. Sometimes they recognize someone they know. And then it is time to sample the cakes and cookies. Some of which are provided by a generous baker in town. Almost all the guests are in their eighties or even nineties and possess such a sense of humor. Pure delight!
There is a truly wonderful atmosphere of empathy and friendliness.
The topic of cakes sometimes creates conversation focused on Belgian chocolate brownies to lemon sponge cakes. There is some humor because I just love chocolate brownies! One or two guests after being served cakes at the ‘goodie’ table hide such cakes behind their backs pretending I won’t see them! Such laughter and smiles.
There are around 35+ guests and increasing as local residents recommend the Chat-Tea Café. Volunteers take orders and serve the tea, coffee, and goodies. We sit with guests and chat. Sometimes, a guitarist comes along, sings, and plays. His Dad was a volunteer and 93 years old. Very special.
Occasionally someone accompanies a person with dementia. By the end of the event, they are very, very gently engaging, or just sitting comfortably having a cake and tea. So special.
So many compliments are afforded to volunteers. We volunteer because we just love making a difference.
Such wonderful guests.
So rewarding.
Images courtesy of Chat Tea Cafe
There are many articles I have written, covering a multitude of areas. Today, being Holy Saturday, I read something that reminded me of the absence of my daughter, who turned 49 just a few days ago. I haven’t been able to have contact with her or see her in 8 years, heartbreaking to say the least. It’s not that I haven’t tried, I have. I’ve sent cards, and tried to reach her through social media, but I am blocked everywhere I turn. As I mentioned at the beginning today is Holy Saturday, where the focus is the absence of Our Lord. It reminded me of the absence of my daughter, except that Jesus never leaves those who love HIM.
Mary, Jesus’ mother pondered all things in her heart, even when She sat in silence, Her heart still was bleeding from all that had taken place on Good Friday, the Crucifixion of Her Son. I have pondered over in my heart so much of the last eight years of not being able to see my daughter or grandchildren, that my heart is pierced again and again, waiting for hearts to change.
I am not comparing myself to Jesus’ mother, I couldn’t, based on what She endured, watching the cruel treatment, almost unrecognizable torture of Her Son, as witnessed in the movie, “The Passion”. I can only say that as a mother who loves both her son and daughter, that my pain as an earthly mother is sometimes hard to bear. So, I sit and wait, I pray, trusting that my prayers will someday be answered, not maybe, but without question, whether I am here or after I am gone. Mary was able to share in the glory of the Resurrection of Her Son, as I, and many Christians around the world will also do. Wherever my daughter, grandchildren, and son are on this Easter day, I hope they will know that my table waits to have them sit and share a meal, to know how much I have loved them always, and like when Christ broke the prison bars of death and rose victorious from the underworld, that what keeps us separated will no longer be.
Zen leaps onto the unconventional Flourishing Business Canvas to explore the possibilities with Antony Upward. A Sustainability Business Architect and Principal of flourishing enterprise design consultancy, Antony is the founding entrepreneur of Edward James Consulting Ltd.
His focus is creating sustainable outcomes for enterprises by integrating all three dimensions of sustainability, social/people, environmental/planet, and economic/profit, into holistic solutions using business model diagnosis and design. Our discussion highlights the model and takes a deep dive into the world view that is transforming through scientific discoveries.
Mr. Upward has thirty years of management consulting experience focused on a full range of business process and information systems projects for a variety of clients. In 2010 he returned to university full-time, completing his graduate thesis in Strongly Sustainable Business Model Design in 2013. Mr. Upward is working with a global group of co-authors on a crowd-funded collaborative book to bring his new better strongly sustainable business model design tool to the world (www.FlourishingBusiness.org).
Our conversation brings to light the struggle to create conversations that matter FIRST in the development of flourishing businesses. It’s people that matter in the matter of business. Their ability to communicate effectively and with passion and purpose are primary components of agile business today.
For more, visit: http://www.edwardjames.biz/
- Connect with Antony on LinkedIn – https://www.linkedin.com/in/antonyupward/
- Connect with Zen on LinkedIn – https://linkedin.com/in/zenbenefiel
- Subscribe to One World in a New World – https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCuZl_29zHxehqeL89KSCWFA
- Music: Outcasts and Social Misfits (Zen on drums) https://bit.ly/2TSNdoQ
- Buy Zen a coffee: https://bit.ly/3gxIceb
From the Battlefield to the Boardroom with Frank Zacarri, Larry Broughton, and Dennis PitoccoFrank Zaccari is a best-selling author who has written six books about life-altering events. Business Secrets for Walking on Water is the first of a three-book series. An accomplished speaker, Frank teaches aspiring entrepreneurs at Arizona State University, is a mentor with the Veterans Treatment Court, and is a mentor and judge with the University of California Entrepreneurship Academy. His International Voice America radio show, Life Altering Events, recently moved to Roku TV and has 220,000 listeners in 42 countries. With 30 years of expert experience as a successful executive, author, and entrepreneur, Frank teaches aspiring entrepreneurs and leaders to uncover hidden opportunities, find the connections to create solutions to business and personal challenges, and build high-performing teams to succeed. A native of western New York, Frank Zaccari served as a medic in the U.S. Air Force, then spent over 20 years in the high-tech industry. Holding senior positions with Fortune 50 organizations and turning around small and mid-size companies, Frank brings immense knowledge of business, finance, organizational development, people, and success to his engaging spoken presentations and books. Education •• UCLA Anderson School of Business – Management Development for Entrepreneurs Certification Program •• California State University at Sacramento – Bachelors of Science – Finance https://frankzaccari.com/
Larry Broughton is an award-winning entrepreneur, CEO, best-selling author, former US Army #GreenBeret, and internationally acclaimed keynote speaker. He regularly makes radio and television appearances to discuss entrepreneurship, strengths-based team building, and the leadership gap he sees growing across America. Visit Larry at https://larrybroughton.me/ and follow @larrybroughton on social platforms.
Dennis Pitocco presides over 360° NATION, which includes a publishing division –the award-winning BIZCATALYST 360°; a multimedia division –360° Nation Studios; and a social enterprise division –GoodWorks 360°. All that is done is done “for good” versus for profit, as his everlasting quest is to reimagine & rediscover humanity at its very best. Period. https://www.bizcatalyst360.com/
Conversations That Make a Difference with Teresa Velardi airs every Tuesday at 5AM and 5PM Eastern Time with Call in Live Video Shows every 1st and 3rd Tuesdays at 5pmET on syndicated Dreamvisions 7 Radio & TV Network. If you would like to call #TeresaVelardi with a question or share a comment during show dial 646-558-8656 ID: 8836953587 press #. To Ask a Question remember 9 to raise your hand Come Learn more and LIKE Teresa’s page https://dreamvisions7radio.com/conver… on syndicated Dreamvisions 7 Radio & TV Network. Listen Live Stream on Station: http://bit.ly/Dreamvisions7Radio_Network https://dreamvisions7radio.com/*
We sometimes come full circle back to our first love, and in this case, it is music. Meet Arlis Walker, frontman for The Southern Outlaws Band. He hails from the backwoods of WV, and has a strong background in music having left it behind, becoming a sheriff, only to find himself at a crossroads.
The universe always seems to find a way to bring us home to our roots. Through some tough life trials and tribulations, a deep part of his soul made a choice to live life to the fullest and the winding road led him right into the arms of his heart song.
Read on, and learn more about Arlis Walker and his life legacy.
Eileen: You come from the backwoods of WV. What were the roots of becoming a musician and how has it influenced who you are today?
Arlis: Our Grandfather played bluegrass with The West Virginia Travelers, and he was a big supporter of Mike Bright Jr. and me. We both fell in love with music right away as we grew up in the business. Our biggest takeaway from him was never forget where you come from.
Eileen: Would you share an experience from childhood that sticks in your mind?
Arlis: The first experience was when I was young, we were at a bluegrass festival in WV and our good friend Charlie Adkins played an upright bass. He sat me on his lap, they handed me a mic and I started to sing Blue Moon of Kentucky. I was hooked ever since.
Eileen: Music does seem to have a way of getting us hooked! Growing up, did you have a dream to be on the big stage? Please share some of the stepping stones that helped get you there.
Arlis: Growing up I always wanted to fulfill our grandfather’s dream of playing at The Grand Ole Opry. With a lot of hard work and a lot of big influences from other musicians like Jerry Douglas and Charlie Waller from The Country Gentlemen, in 1994 I made that dream come true when I got the honor of playing on the stage of The Grand Ole Opry.
Eileen: Would love to know what it was like to stand on that stage and you realized you made the dream come true.
Arlis: Standing backstage and seeing the barn backdrop and the circle I was about to stand on made the hairs on my arm stand up. It was a moment that words can’t describe. It wasn’t until I was done did it sink in that I finally made it.
Eileen: Glade to see you dream big! I like to say, Life is the Master Teacher, and when we follow our passion, sometimes there are obstacles as lessons to learn. Would you share some of the twists and turns you have had as a musician, a Southern gentleman, and a singer/songwriter?
Arlis: After playing in Nashville my daughter was only 2 years old, and the road was no life for a young child. I made the hard decision to step away from music to raise our daughter and made the career jump into Law Enforcement, but the music was always in my heart. Stepping away was the hardest thing to do, but the right thing to do for my family at the time. I always missed the excitement of being in front of a crowd.
Eileen: It seems you have come full circle and music is back in your life! Do you have any mentors or people who helped you along your life’s journey? What would you say has been their most poignant message that you still live by today? Why?
Arlis: I had many mentors in my music career, but the biggest thing I’ve learned from all of them is with hard work and dedication you can make your dreams come true. Never stop at NO. Keep pushing for that yes.
Eileen: I love it, never stop at NO. You had a career as a Sheriff and retired due to being injured in the line of duty. Do your songs reflect your experience in this position? Why?
Arlis: When I first got injured I was in a wheelchair for 3 years, and was told by doctors that I might never walk again. With everything I’ve learned from people around me is to never give up. Music was the most powerful thing that gave me determination and with the love and support from my wife, I worked hard to rehab myself and return to my first love MUSIC. So I try to write songs that lift and energize people’s souls to make them happy and help them overcome life’s challenges.
Eileen: So inspiring!! Did you have a daily mantra, something you held on tightly to that enabled the grit and determination to say, “not going to happen, watch and you will see!”
Arlis: I see a lot of people these days taking what the doctors say at face value. You should never let anyone tell you, you can’t do something. One big takeaway is when one door closes there is always another waiting to be opened. In my case, I kicked the door down.
Eileen: Good for you!! What have you learned about people, life, what’s important, and the value of music?
Arlis: I’ve learned that there is too much hate in the world. We all need to stop and look around that everyone is different and that’s what makes us all special. We are all human and that’s the common thread that brings us all together as ONE, and music is the universal language that speaks to everyone’s soul.
Eileen: Amen to this!! Do you have an example of a memorable positive experience that sheds light on how, if we look at life from a positive perspective, instead of hate, miracles or beautiful things happen?
Arlis: When we take the stage, we make it about everyone. I’ve seen bikers, business professionals, young, and old coming together and having a big party together at our shows. That is truly a beautiful thing to see because nothing matters but music and having a great time.
Eileen: Your band, Southern Outlaws Band, just formed in 2020 and has already won some awards. That is quite an achievement in such a short period of time. Tell me what you believe has enabled you to come out strong in the beginning and you keep getting better!
Arlis: I have the honor of playing with some of the most talented musicians in the business, this includes Dave Weilacher 2nd/Lead Guitar; Guitar boogie Bob Furda/ Lead Guitar; Tim Williams/ Bass; my cousin Mike Bright Jr./ Drums and our manager Sandi that takes care of us all. We all come from different backgrounds in music that makes our unique sound that is us. Dave and Bob are also talented songwriters. It’s the three of us that write music for The Southern Outlaws Band, and truly an honor to be with such hard-working musicians. We are a FAMILY.
Eileen: The music world has changed since your upbringing in WV. For any new artists trying to make it in this industry what tips would you like to share?
Arlis: For new artists, the music business is hard, but never give up and with hard work and determination you can reach for the stars.
Eileen: We all have stories to tell. Is there one in particular that readers and fans would love to hear and it is one that you will never forget?
Arlis: The one story that I’ll never forget is we were playing a fair in Pennsylvania and there was a fan that wanted to see us, we then found out by her husband that she had cancer. Our manager Sandi then told me. We stopped during the show, Sandi and I walked over and gave her a T-shirt. She in return gave me a huge hug and we both had tears. I then sang her a song. That meant the world to both of them. We truly care about all our fans and anytime we can have a special moment like that, it’s something we will carry with us always.
Eileen: Love this!! It is rewarding to know you make a difference in people’s lives through the art of music and truly caring about your fans. What are you and your band’s intentions for the foreseeable future? You have a unique sound, style, and something fresh for global appeal.
Arlis: Our intention for the future is to keep reaching for the stars and entertaining everyone with a high-energy show. If we can make someone forget the troubles they have, if only for a short while, and lift their spirits, we have done our job.
Eileen: Excellent! What an incredible life, legacy, and heart-centered interview. Thank you, Arlis!
You can hear Arlis and The Southern Outlaws Band by going to their YouTube Channel and reach out to them for bookings. You can also watch them on the ROKU Channel, OTEL Music Videos.
Social Media Links:
- Spotify https://open.spotify.com/album/3VIgjMXT67k0iLGix7UaFg?si=b-vgsMWrQRa13p39en76Ngⅆ=1
- YouTube https://youtube.com/channel/UC-T1V9iFNenRrkwtpMphuEQ
- Facebook https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100057216348967&mibextid=ZbWKwL
- Website https://www.thesouthernoutlawsband.com
Bio: The Southern Outlaws Band is from Northeast Ohio, formed in October 2020. They have 12 songs released at this time, six being originals written by members of the band. Each member of the 5-piece band has their own style, giving them the opportunity to put on an incredible show for fans. They have won two WSA awards and one International Songwriters Award. In 2022, the band won International Song of the Year with “Louisiana Water.” Their national sponsors include Clayton Picks USA, Gone Country Hats, and Budweiser, and they are Brand Ambassadors of Makers Mark Bourbon, along with other sponsorship partners. You can hear them on over 180 radio stations around the world, their Southern Outlaws album is available on Spotify, Pandora, Amazon, I-Heart Radio, and you can watch them on the ROKU Channel, and OTEL Music Videos.
Life.
Hanging
on a fragile
Balance.
A distant
murmur
calls.
As the ghost
of a memory
begins to play
back
and over
the rainbow
of hope.
May you find
another
so restless,
gentle
and kind enough
to protect
your fragile
little branches
of life.
One of the BIGGEST ideas Western Society shoved down your throat was that ONE teacher will tell you THE WAY. That is not accurate or of service to you. Everybody is right. So pick the best fruit from everyone’s plate and leave the parsley.
EXAMPLE: INTUITIVE EATING
I have a client right now beginning her intuitive eating journey. She told me that she’s been consuming tons and tons of media about it, and all of these people- RD’s even- say that if ANYONE tells you to restrict ANYTHING on an intuitive eating journey, that’s diet culture.
WELL. That’s TRUE.
However, if a person has only consumed Pop-Tarts and McDonald’s in their entire lives when they go to intuitively eat, they’re going to crave Pop-Tarts and McDonald’s. When their bodies want protein, they’ll reach for chicken nuggets, and when they need carbs/sugar, they’ll reach for Pop-Tarts. And yes, that’s intuitive eating. Their brains have not learned to translate the “I need glucose” to anything but a Pop-Tart because the brain has no frame of reference outside of a Pop-Tart.
We receive intuition all the time from our bodies, and the brain translates those messages to us based on its knowledge base.
However, a Pop-Tart is a processed food that will outlast the apocalypse. It isn’t the best thing for us to put into our bodies. It’s got an ingredient list longer than the declaration of independence. It causes inflammation and contributes to obesity and cancer and all of those OTHER THINGS that medical professionals talk about.
So, who’s right? Everybody.
Processed foods do cause obesity and cancer and inflammation. And also, you shouldn’t restrict food when you intuitively eat. Both correct.
So how do we balance? We subscribe to the idea that everybody is right and we widen our palates to include new, non-processed foods. It is even VERY beneficial to get rid of processed foods completely, JUST SO your body can have an adjustment period and LEARN to crave the new foods.
Once your body does the required learning, when you go to intuitively eat, your body likely will crave the non-processed food more than the processed. Because your BODY will recognize where it gets the nutrients and your brain will translate that message to “you want salmon for dinner.”
Everything in our world is paradoxical, right down to our being itself.
I’ll never forget when I read the words from the brilliant Simone Seol “the capacity to hold a paradox is the sign of a grown-up mind.”
So, so right.
I didn’t eat sugar or processed food for a LONG time while my body went through its re-learning phase. And then, I started slowly bringing those things back in. NOW, there is no way in hell my body would allow me to eat a Pop-Tart diet. It would make me ill.
There was a time recently when I had a box of Trader Joe’s PB&J bars sitting there (processed and sweet) and literally just stared at them, starving. My body said “Andrea please go eat some red meat,” and my brain KNEW that eating those bars would not make me less hungry.
Your brain (a computer) can only run the applications it has installed. Everybody is right. Install more applications.
When you want to transform something, know that there is not one solid idea. Everyone will feed you brilliance, and you have to select and choose what pieces fit into the puzzle. Follow the white rabbit.
Remember, Yin and Yang?
Our feminine is our flow- it’s how we flow along with Tao. Our feminine is necessary for us to be aligned. The masculine is the disciplined do-er, also necessary. My feminine gives me the inspiration to write these emails. My masculine sits my ass down and writes them a few times a week, and writes them with pig-headed discipline. (Grabbed that phrase from a book I’m reading currently.)
Transformation isn’t hard. It is hard when you rely on one teacher for one message. Triangulation of methods brings us a greater understanding in research. Why wouldn’t that work with our bodies? And everything else in life.
Food for thought.
THE ROAD TO NOWHERE
Sometimes the nowhere road takes us on a journey to the lonely places in our hearts where we find the truth about ourselves.
LEGEND HAS IT THAT PART THREE
It was a year of new things. I had to learn where I fit and how to fit. I learned that life was not as simple as living on the farm, but I faced my fear and earned the respect and friendship of a lot of new friends, friends that are still friends to this day. I also discovered the sea and the marshes and the many adventures they held. I grew a little that day, maybe more than a six-year-old should have to grow.
Fear is a crippling feeling. It is a feeling that we must face if only to conquer it. That day freed me up to live my life and to walk on that playground knowing that I could walk without fear. I started another part of my journey that day. I swore that I would always be strong, fearless, and be a dragon slayer. I also knew that I would never stand by and let anyone hurt someone because of how they looked or where they came from. Over the years I have had many opportunities to stand by a friend when they needed me.
THE WAYWARD SON
Sometimes we travel not to run from our fears but to run toward them, meeting them head-on. We travel to learn of life and the mysteries and knowledge it may teach us. My journey that summer changed my life forever. It taught me that within me I had the strength to travel the road, the knowledge to make decisions that allowed me my adventure yet kept me safe.
THE WAYWARD SON – PART TWO
Life can be faced the same way. We can be bold and fearless and learn from the many places that the tracks take us. Life provides us many opportunities if we can embrace that sense of adventure and have the courage and faith to walk through the doors that life opens. Most of all I learned how few things I really needed to be happy and that opportunities to help people be kind and caring would always be there in abundance. My Mom called me her wayward son. My Daddy just put his hand on my shoulder and smiled asking me where I was off to next.
I am a poet
I don’t like to act under any duress
I love to enjoy my freedom
Not being scripted by the ruling fraternity to satiate their souls at random.
Poets are having an inherent capacity
To draw a picture of future suppose to be emerged with their audacity
None in the corridor of power like their integrity
Poets are always subjected to few nefarious faculties atrocity!
Poets are like caged bard
As long they sing to soothe their master’s heart
They are fed and nurtured with care by their masters
Failing which they unknowingly script their tryst with destiny
When masters find them futile, no longer bringing any melody
They tend to kill them for their flesh without any qualms or any sense of guilty
Their existence is just obliterated from nature’s floor by the whims
of their masters
When their voices no longer satiate the desire of their masters!
Birds death hardly having any impact on human’s faculty
They die regularly in huge number silently
But we human feel abruptly startled
When a stone block fell in nature’s surface
We could realize evidently the impact of strong force and gravity
Weak force do have a say in our available vicinity
But hardly having any impact on our mental fecundity!
Since time immemorial poets are struggling
To serve mankind with their adept style
Paving the way for a new world to emerge
Where equality overbears and makes a huge appeal to the majority to
promote a sensible ruckus!
Episode Summary3 tips to help you clarify what’s heard and said in a conversation.
Episode NotesHello to you listening in Weatherford, Texas!
Coming to you from Whidbey Island, Washington this is Stories From Women Who Walk with 60 Seconds for Thoughts on Thursday and your host, Diane Wyzga.
A man drives into a filling station and asks the attendant to fill the tank with gas. The attendant sees 3 penguins standing on the back seat of the car and tells the man, Hey! You should take those penguins to the zoo. The man says, Good idea! And drives away.
About a week later the same man returns to the filling station and asks the attendant to fill the tank. The attendant sees the same 3 penguins but now they’re wearing sunhats, sunglasses, and beach sandals. He says, Hey! I thought I told you to take those penguins to the zoo! I did, replied the man, And we had such a good time today we’re going to the beach!
Practical Tip: We think we know it all, don’t we? Most of us haven’t heard the half of it when we speak with others. Conversation is a mutual exchange. To have clarity in our conversations let’s begin by asking ourselves:
What did they say?
What did I hear?
Was it the same, or different?
You’re invited*: “Come for the stories – stay for the magic!” Speaking of magic, I hope you’ll subscribe, follow, share a 5-star rating and nice review on your social media or podcast channel of choice, and join us next time!* Remember to stop by the website, check out the Services, arrange a Discovery Call, and Opt-In to stay current with Diane and Quarter Moon Story Arts and on LinkedIn.
Stories From Women Who Walk Production Team
Podcaster: Diane F Wyzga & Quarter Moon Story Arts
Music: Mer’s Waltz from Crossing the Waters by Steve Schuch & Night Heron Music
Plant
Plant based
Plant based butter
Bought
Dark
Dark chocolate
Dark chocolate chips
Found
Flour
Flour and water
Unleavened flour and water
Boxed
Pan
Pan and parchment paper
Pan, parchment paper and oven mitts
Ready
Bubbling
Bubbling toffee
Bubbling toffee flowing
Poured
Flowing
Flowing voices
Flowing voices of joy
Heard
Streaming
Streaming lines
Streaming lines of people
Seen
Seeing
Seeing straight
Seeing straight ahead and back again
To watch
To watch out
To watch out for an attack
To survive
To survive plagues
To survive the attack of ten plagues
Looking
Looking for a sign
Looking for a sign of survival
To watch
To watch out
To watch out for water
Water
What is water?
Water is life
Life
Life
Life flows
Life flows in water
Flowing in water is a plant based basket
Basket
A basket
A basket made of plants
A basket made of plants and tears
Tears
Tears and sand
Tears, sand and sweat
Sweat
Sweat and salt
Sweat, salt water, and bittersweet tears
Sweat, salt water, and bittersweet tears of birth
Birth
Birth of secrets
Birth of secrets and servitude
Birth of secrets, servitude and freedom
Freedom
Freedom to pause
Pause
Pause to retell
Pause to remember
Pause to count
Pause to be counted
Pause to ask
Pause to answer
Answer
Answer a call
Answer the call
The call
The call for freedom
Freedom
Free
Free to drink
Free to drink water
Free to drink water from the well
Well
Well enough
Well enough to sing
Sing
Sing of freedom
Sing of freedom and dance
Sing of freedom and dance with timbrels
Freedom to sing and dance with timbrels across the desert
Desert
Desert of life
Desert of life and death
Desert of life, death and remembrance
Remember
Remember the ingredients
Remember the ingredients of your beliefs
Believe
Believe you can
Believe you can survive
Believe you can survive and thrive
Thrive
Thrive forwards
Thrive forwards with one step
Thrive forwards with one tiny might step
Steps count
Recount
Count
Out
You
You count,
Not
To
Forget
An original poem by Hope Blecher Croney
The 30days30works prompt was to do something backwards. My backwards was starting with baking desserts for Passover before cooking the first course of a meal during which we gathered to tell the story of an exodus.
I baked matzo toffee. The ingredients were plant based butter, dark brown sugar, matzah, dark chocolate chips, sweet raisins, and salty nut pieces
It started with an empty box and a 5-minute activity: find 10 ‘treasures’ that we may (or may not) be ready to let go of during our Find Your Simple group clearing session. As I walked through the rooms of my mostly clutter-free home, all I could see were rocks.
Seriously.
Painted rocks. Crystals. Cairns. Fossils & precious stone collections. Bowls of rocks awaiting my paint pens.
By the time I returned to our zoom room, I was laughing…a bit sheepishly. Am I the only one who collects ‘special’ rocks, bringing back one or two (or five) to commemorate a significant nature moment?
OK, so my #blessingrocks have brought many a smile to the people who receive them, and this creative outlet has been a joyful pastime. The fossils were given to us by a friend and are very interestingly sorted into categories in their ornate box inside a curio cabinet. The cairns are a reminder of sorts, bringing me back to several significant trips, pointing me toward those times of simple being.
But still.
How many rocks does one woman need?
I decided my first clearing project would be to really look at the rocks in my life, and if you know me by now, you’ll realize this quickly became about more than the physical rocks.
Yes, I did remove many of the rocks from my house, after gathering them into one space, sorting, and then choosing what I truly want to keep. The rest I moved into the garden.
As I moved rocks, I considered the projects that have started to feel heavy in my mental-emotional spaces. Most of these were taken on with enthusiasm, but together they are starting to topple my energy.
My soul wants plenty of spaciousness and freedom to flow, to create, to connect in the moment. When I am too busy with promises and projects, I often miss the miracle of showing up for the spontaneous mystery of life.
Part of me believes this sounds selfish, but being busy with too many things that don’t bring joy is like having too many rocks lying around the house: heavy.
Which reminds me of the time-management story where the professor asks her students to fill a glass jar with large rocks (most important), then tiny pebbles (less important but still necessary), and finally sand (insignificant) to reflect the activities in their lives. When the jar is filled in that order, there is room for all three. If the order is reversed, the insignificant activities (sand) take up all the space and there is no room for the most important (rocks).
So maybe gathering all those rocks is a GOOD thing!
But back to the purpose of this article, which is not only to admit that I can have a sense of humor when I discover how many ways I am not practicing the art of simplicity.
I am writing about…moving rocks!
What’s the purpose of moving (and letting go of) rocks or other treasures…and why do we gather these treasures in the first place?
Humans are made to gather…it’s how we survive times of lack. But when we gather too much, hold on too long, attach too strongly to our belongings, beliefs, and behaviors, then our energy becomes stale rather than flowing.
Movement is essential. It’s how life evolves.
Moving stuff creates freshness in more than our physical spaces. After I moved the rocks and other physical clutter from my house, my mind started to feel lighter…even before I let go of any of my ‘too-many’ projects. The physical moving shifted how I was holding all of my commitments, bringing my mind into balance and releasing the joy flow.
I’m still likely to let go of a few of the projects that are no longer serving, but for now it feels good to simply notice the spaciousness, especially after taking 2-weeks off-grid in the beautiful red ROCK canyons of Valley of Fire.
In this moment, I am also congratulating myself for returning from that trip having left ALL of the rocks in nature where they belong.
Images courtesy of the author
I’m sitting in the silence of my today
The space between the music, thoughts, memories
The space before the sounds of the day ahead emerge …
It’s a still place
A silent space
A soft space
A deep space
A knowing place
A holding space
A comforting space
A space from which to gain strength
A space in which to feel love
A space of warmth
A space of depth and richness
A space of hope
A sacred place
Life dries up for some people. Their lives become full of dryness. Dryness of hope, future possibilities, and dryness of brains.This is what I felt reading the life story of Jean L. Serio in her chapter of the great and recently released book “Mission Hope”. The book has many other stories that are worthy, but this post focuses on the story shared by Jean titled “The Universe Doesn’t Always Accept Your Plan”, pages 149-155.
Jeans’ story is a great example of her struggle with many duties since she was a child. While other children were playing and enjoying life, Jean was taking care of her ailing sister and making sure to look after her. She endured this responsibility for years. When finally she managed to attend college, her studies and dreams fell through, as again she had to care for her maternal mother and grandfather.
There is no one way to describe the pain than of the one who suffered from it. Reading Jean’s descriptions of how much she had to cope with made me realize how my life was easy compared to hers. She accepted her duties and I found almost no complaints in her writing. She suffered but with admirable endurance.
That suffering eventually had some nice rewards for her. First, when she attended church and met a wise man who irrigated her dry hopes and revived them. After graduation, she met her old love from years ago. The surprise was that both got promotion offers to relocate to two places that were very close. That was convenient for both of them to meet and get closer to marry and lead a happy life together.
A great reward is the discovery that all the hardships Jean faced enhanced her resilience and awakening to the fact helped her exceed her responsibilities evidenced by her more than doubling her sales target at work. Jean’s experiences and studies helped qualify her in moving to human resources for which she was well suited. She was emotionally intelligent and understood people’s behaviors. Jean became an authority on human resources and managed with empathy and kindness.
The pains we suffer today are the hope of having a bright future. Never let your heart dry up. Read the book and you shall find many other inspiring stories.
Life is a testing ground. The book shows you that suffering can be a prelude to a meaningful life.
This is the fourth installment of my series of interviews with companies exploring innovative and emerging technologies impacting global markets and the digital landscape. With the proliferation of sophisticated cyber-attacks by threat actors, securing corporate data is more important than ever. The DataStealth platform developed by a company called Datex based out of Canada may be an equalizer against new automated threats and is already proving itself invaluable in protecting sensitive data from cyber threats. In the interview below I speak with Ed Leavens, CEO of Datex about their paradigm-changing DataStealth Platform.**
Ed, Thank you for taking the time to speak with me. Can you tell me about your company and your unique approach to Data Privacy and Governance?
Having been in the business of data security for many years, we noticed a trend. Organizations are constantly being breached, whether by a malicious insider or from adversarial/nation-state attacks. Despite best efforts and deploying best-of-breed technologies which protect the endpoint, the perimeter, or within the cloud. Sensitive data is still accessed and exfiltrated.
The Solution:
While these technologies are still very necessary, organizations need to look beyond traditional approaches to cybersecurity and incorporate a strategy to protect their sensitive data. This is why the DataStealth platform was developed.
No CEO/CISO wants to be a headline for losing employee/customer personal information or even sensitive documents pertaining to their product/solution. Sensitive data is now under the microscope more than ever. Even the newly released National Cybersecurity Strategy administered by the Biden Administration speaks to this. One of the Objectives is to hold stewards of sensitive data accountable for protection.
Can you elaborate more about what is DataStealth? How can it be used and what industries are most suited?
DataStealth:
The DataStealth platform has one goal -To protect sensitive data and documents.
- DataStealth is proven.
- It is deployed in some of the largest and most sophisticated enterprise companies in the world.
- DataStealth is unique.
- The core technology of DataStealth is patented.
How It Works:
DataStealth is a network layer solution deployed in the path of network traffic that applies a data protection policy to network traffic in real-time. A DataStealth data protection policy can perform many functions;
Inspect Network Traffic
Identify Sensitive Data
Classify Sensitive Data
Protect Sensitive Data
Uniqueness:
- Easy to deploy.
- A simple network change is usually all the is required.
- Unlike other vendors, DataStealth is easy to install.
- No agents. No plugins. No collectors. No APIs.
- No development
- No development or other changes to any applications.
Industries:
- DataStealth customers are typically organizations where privacy, regulatory, compliance or governance are of concern.
- For example, where privacy legislation requires an organization to take responsibility for the care and control of data, and non-compliance leads to significant financial penalties (i.e., EU’s GDPR, Canada’s Bill C-27, Australia Data Privacy Act).
- Industries that gravitate to DataStealth include financial services, insurance, telecommunications, retail, and government.
- although these industries seem to vary, the commonality is that they are all concerned about data privacy, regulatory, compliance, or governance.
Can you provide a synopsis of a case example for a Data Stealth user?
Sure, DataStealth can solve many problems faced by organizations today.
Use Cases:
One of our key use cases that we talk about on almost a daily basis with customers, is our ability to reduce the audit scope for PCI-DSS 4.0 (Payment Card Industry Data Security Standards). This standard impacts all entities that store, process, and/or transmit cardholder data. Which essentially encompasses Hospitality, Retail, Financial, Telco, Government and the list goes on. There is also a requirement for Real-time content protection that has come from the update to 4.0 which the platform is able to deliver.
The more generalized use cases found within Data Privacy and Governance requirements are ideal for all data-driven Enterprises as our platform delivers a unique approach to Data Discovery and Classification, Test Data Management, Dynamic Data Masking, Audit and Logging, Metrics Monitoring and Alerting, and Cloud Migrations, all while protecting data assets at scale.
Below is a case study on one of the client’s loyalty and payment programs.
Case Study:
- Points
- Loyalty Commerce Platform
- trusted partner to close to 60 of the world’s largest loyalty programs.
- 1 billion loyalty member accounts and processes over 92 billion transactions annually across six continents and in over 50 different currencies
- The Problem
- Payment cards exist across all Points IT environments.
- Presents a data security concern.
- Presents a requirement for an annual PCI DSS third-party audit.
- The Solution
- DataStealth intercepts all payment card data before it reaches Points environment.
- Payment card data is replaced by tokens, substitute values that look and act like payment cards but have no real payment card data.
- No payment card data exists in Points environment.
- The Outcome
- “We just set up some network routing rules, and it was really quite easy and seamless.”
- “We never have to handle any credit card information.”
- “If we don’t have the credit card data, we can’t expose the credit card data.”
- “The biggest benefit over the past five years is peace of mind.”
- Alan Owens, VP Information Security, and Privacy
What do you see as the most challenging threats to securing data and networks in the near future? (For example, artificial intelligence, IoT, Quantum…)
While we believe there are certainly great developments to be had in cyber, let’s take a more holistic look at the approach itself.
- Status quo
- Status quo is not a solution.
- Organizations need to stay ahead of nefarious actors.
- Doing the ‘same old’ and expecting something to change is insanity.
- “Doing the same thing over and over, and expecting a different result, is the definition of insanity” – Albert Einstein
- Not doing anything
- Hope is not a strategy.
- The Silver Bullet
- There is no silver bullet.
- Organizations need to start thinking holistically.
- What sensitive data do I have?
- Where do I store it?
- How and when do I need to use it?
- How can I protect it?
What are your plans for expanding into the US market and how can prospective partners work with you?
We spent the last few years perfecting DataStealth; Understanding our customer’s challenges. Understanding our customer’s requirements. Creating a ‘Customer First, Second Nature.” culture and solution that achieves exactly what our enterprise customers want and need. We have customers across the globe; Canada, USA, Australia, New Zealand, European Union, and more. We are looking for additional partners across the globe, particularly in the United States. The time has come the take the ‘stealth’ out of DataStealth and introduce this amazing technology to more organizations across the globe.
How can readers find out more about DataStealth?
Our website is https://datexdatastealth.com/ or we can be reached via email if folks would like to set up a time to chat. info@DatexDataStealth.com
Thank you for a very informative Interview!
I moved to Waverly Iowa which was about a twenty-minute drive from Waterloo. Turns out Tom had moved there as well to be closer to his job. I started working at a restaurant called Carver’s restaurant. I worked my way up to lead server and was able to hire and fire and do the scheduling. They had a banquet room, and I did a lot of banquets as it was a guaranteed 15 percent gratuity. However, I was working so much that I started getting speed white cross and black beauties from a brother to stay awake and keep up with the work.
SEE ALL PRIOR PARTS BELOW︎
Shattered Innocence (Part 9): Homeward Bound
But I was making enough to make it on my own now. I tried working in the bar as a bartender there it was called Friar Tucks my mother was a bartender during the days. I was scared for some reason maybe because it was mostly men in there. I met a guy by the name of Gary who was very nice he was tall and heavy a long black beard and long thin black hair with a receding forehead. Not at all a handsome man but he was as kind as a teddy bear, and I felt somehow calm and protected when he was around. I was to go in and work a Saturday by myself for the first tie and my anxiety was running high. I felt faint and flushed before I even unlocked the doors to the bar I went into the women’s bathroom and that’s all I could remember I had passed out and the owner found me on the floor in the bathroom. My mother was called, and she came to work for me. I decided I just wasn’t cut out to be a bartender and just concentrated on being a server after that incident but Gary ad I had gotten to be good friends and often after work I would go sit in the bar and visit with him.
Meanwhile, my dad lost his job at Sears and Roebuck company after 28 years not sure why, but they cheated him out of his retirement as well. He was jobless and fell into a deep depression. At the age of fifty. Gary and I were getting along so well I brought the subject up of living together and he thought it was a promising idea. So, I moved in with him. He worked at John Deer’s and had his own house and a nice truck and El Camino car to drive I had nothing.
I was looking for security and on the rebound from Tom and Gary was so nice to me a perfect gentleman. I was still married to Tom. He had a girlfriend or friends and was doing his own thing. Gary and I got closer in our relationship not physically but emotionally and when he asked me to marry, I said yes. As I said at that time I had extremely low self-esteem and was looking for some sense of security. And I thought I could keep working and go to college and get a degree after all Gary would pay the bills. Or I would even be able to help my parents out with bills as they still had my younger brother and sister living at home and I knew they were having a tough time making ends meet.
I was driving an old Oldsmobile of Gary’s to and from work and when he bought El Camino, he let me drive it. His friends all told him I just wanted after his money they didn’t believe I could care for a burly guy like Gary who looked like a lumberjack. That made me angry because the truth was yes, I was looking for security, but I fully intended to pay for my education and help my parents. So, I filed for divorce from Tom I was finally going to throw the towel in and start fresh. But when it came to the last day before the court to dissolve the marriage, I had to see Tom one more time I had to be sure. I told Gary I was going to speak with Tom, and I went to his Apartment. He knew I had filed as he was served the papers. I told him how I felt and that I still had a love for him. He held me in his arms all night and we talked in daylight I asked the ultimate question. If you can promise me, you won’t fool around on me anymore I won’t divorce you. He looked me straight in the eyes and said I’m sorry I can’t promise you that. I thanked him for being honest and I went to leave.
The Oldsmobile was gone. Gary had come in the night to get it. I went to the Waterloo Courthouse that day and appeared in court. Tom never showed up so the divorce was granted we would both keep whatever personal belongings we had. We never had any property to divide up as we were poor when together living from paycheck to paycheck. I felt a deep void in me at the time that I didn’t know if it would ever be filled, I had fought so hard for us to make it and in the end, I failed. Meanwhile, there was Gary to deal with.
To be continued…
While waiting in a doctor’s office last week, I came across this article in the January 30/February 6 edition of Time: “How India Became the Most Important Country in the Climate Fight”. The article noted the difference between the poor state of Jharkhand, in east India, that mines coal (bad) — and Rajasthan, a state in northwestern India, that has wind turbines and solar panels (good). As an indication of Jharkhand’s badness, the article says this:
India will soon be the most important country in the climate change effort … India contributes 7% of the emissions that cause global warming today.
Got that? Countries are important to the climate-change effort, whatever climate change is and whatever that effort is. And global warming is such a given — the science is so settled — that India can be justly blamed for seven percent of it. Done. Not a question to be found. Not a shred of skepticism or curiosity. What we do have, of course, is science. And all of it is settled.
Given the badness of Jharkhand in particular, and of India in general, what’s to be done? The article is as glad you asked that question as it is you didn’t ask any other, more pointed, logical, and objective questions. Here’s its answer:
The International Energy Agency (IEA) estimates India needs $1.4 trillion in additional investment in coming decades to align its energy system with global climate targets; that will very likely require reforms at international lenders like the International Monetary Fund (IMF) and the World Bank to facilitate the flow of money.
Yep. It’s all about the flow of money. And for poor countries like India and its poorest states like Jharkhand, where is that money going to flow from? Do you have a mirror handy? That’s right. Thanks to globalization, organizations like the IEA, the IMF, and the World Bank, the money’s going to flow from you and me in the form of new national and global regulations and their attendant individual taxes. And those regulations and taxes won’t care at all about your household budget, making your ends meet, or the obscenely inflated economy in which you’re trying to make those ends meet.
Ain’t feeling good grand?
The Bear Facts
Speaking of feeling bad, we all remember our heartstrings being de-tuned and all but severed by the National Geographic video of a seemingly starving polar bear, don’t we? Jon Miltimore, author of “The Myth That the Polar Bear Population Is Declining” does. And he calls bullshit on it:
The video, shot by photographers Paul Nicklen and Cristina Mittermeier … sparked outcry over the decimation of polar bears due to global warming … scientists accused National Geographic of “being loose with the facts.” There was no evidence, many pointed out, that the bear’s condition was the result of climate change … Mittermeier admitted as much a year later. “I can’t say that this bear was starving because of climate change,” she wrote in National Geographic.
Well, then. Under those circumstances, we can forgive Miltimore for using the word, myth. He didn’t mean myth. He meant fallacy. The notion that myth and fallacy mean the same thing is a fallacy. But since Miltimore also went on to make this point, we can definitely cut him some slack:
That picture of a single starving bear arguably did more to advance the issue of climate change than any white paper or IPCC report could have. Unfortunately … The State of the Polar Report 2018 put the new global mid-point estimate [of the polar bear population] at more than 30,000 … the estimate is the highest since the polar bear became internationally protected in 1973.
Ooh. That, as a former boss of mine whom we dubbed Queen of the Malaprop would have said, is a flaw in the ointment. And it’s definitely a crimp in the narrative that’s been packaged and sold to us for decades now about anthropogenic global warming, climate change, the indiscriminate decimation of the polar-bear population, and our culpability in all of it, isn’t it? Ouch!
I Know One Place Where It’s Really Warm
It really is kind of a letdown that even the venerable National Geographic is in on the scam. Or maybe it isn’t. If you have a product to sell — as with a magazine, a television network, and a political agenda as National Geographic surely does — messages like everything is pretty much okay, people aren’t going to affect the climate of a dynamic organism like an entire planet, and don’t you have better things to do like taking care of yourself and each other? aren’t going to bring home the bacon (sorry, the plant-based pork substitute).
Ralph Waldo Emerson knew who we should trust. In “Self-Reliance”, he wrote:
God will not have his work made manifest by cowards. A man is relieved and gay when he has put his heart into his work and done his best; but what he has said or done otherwise, shall give him no peace. It is a deliverance which does not deliver. In the attempt his genius deserts him; no muse befriends; no invention, no hope. Trust thyself: every heart vibrates to that iron string.
It’s been suggested to me on occasion that even God reads National Geographic. Call me skeptical, but I suspect he knows better. At the very least, he’s likely to take Commandment eight or nine, depending on your religious tradition, a little more seriously than National Geographic or your more pedestrian peddlers of political posturing do: “Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor.”
I’ve never been neighbors with National Geographic or a polar bear; although, I did cross paths with Al Gore once. It was Monday, January 21st, 2008. I was in the airport in Milwaukee to catch a flight home from a series of client meetings. The wind off Lake Michigan was gusting in excess of 60 miles per hour that day. The temperature was at least minus four degrees Fahrenheit, and the windchill was minus ridiculous. Big Al was in town to give a speech about global warming at Lambeau Field. Nobody showed up.
All of that notwithstanding, I have to call shenanigans on National Geographic, global warming, climate change, the IPCC, the IEA, the IMF, the World Bank, and all their attendant global wealth-redistribution schemes purported to set everything right with the planet. And I have to hope there’s a special place in Hell for Big Al and his exploitative political ilk.
You should, too.
Waiting for the first bumblebee to present itself upon a favorite flower, is an optimistic delight. Hovering and buzzing wings. A wonder with the weight of pollen. Flying, let alone hovering, seeking, and finally choosing ideal blooms that come in line with fussy expectations.
Bumblebees are certainly rather incredible. In theory, they cannot fly, but Nature’s generosity allows them to be greeted by blooms as there is a distinct mutuality of mission; spreading and collecting pollen.
Having written about bumblebees many times, I never cease to be enlightened by these beautiful but gentle giants.
They sting not. Some say they should be called humblebees.
They exchange a mutual courtesy, never seemingly aggressive to one another. Should two land upon a small flower, a polite parting is exchanged; almost ‘have a nice day’.
Bumblebee Rescue!I feel they are certainly worthy of being recognized as one of Nature’s special creatures. Hence perhaps a sense of pleasurable ‘duty’ to rescue such delightful beings. On numerous occasions a bumblebee has been so weighed down with pollen, falling over, often on its back.
Last year, walking along a sidewalk, I noticed a bumblebee loaded with pollen, legs slowly moving, knowing not what to do. With some assistance, I managed to elevate it onto my finger allowing it to be ultimately placed upon a flower.
Another example is how fussy they are. One such fellow that crawled on my hand and was introduced to a small variety of blooms, kept turning around, crawling up my hand, signalling such a bloom did not meet its expectations.
Eventually, a potential flower was found. I turned it around, formerly introducing it to a bloom that came up to its expectations. With what seemed like some form of acknowledgment and an impression of gratitude.
When seen by people during such a rescue operation their looks are a balance of curiosity and wonderment. Especially when many folks think they sting.
I do trust this story has provided a buzz.
Empathy and sympathy are not just two different approaches to confronting the emotional challenges of others; they are diametrically opposite responses in many important ways. Sympathy places another’s problems at a distance from us, places us in a position of superiority, and “drives separation”, says the film’s narrator, Dr. Brené Brown. Empathy, on the other hand, requires that one internalize the feelings of another. That shared experience drives interpersonal connection, she says. “What makes things better is connection.”
The drive home from Boone was a time of reflection on my winter of healing at Henry’s farm. It was now a time of letting go of the pain and finally going home after several years of playing music and helping him work the farm. I knew I had been gone for too long and I missed my mom and dad. They were understanding and caring, and I was missing them so deeply, but I would see them in a few hours.
I loved driving through the country, the winding roads and farmland calmed my soul. I knew I would always love the backroads and lost highways. They would always be the part of my life that defined me, made me who I was. Like the highways, life had many turns, bumpy dirt roads and little did I know that soon I would walk a new path.
I took a side trip to see some of the old farms where I grew up. Just past Fair Bluff, seeing Spring Branch Church I knew I had to stop. I turned into the parking lot and walked into the Sanctuary. Immediately, I was overwhelmed with thoughts of so many Sundays and so many good memories. I did my first play there and I was a cowboy, still am at heart. I closed my eyes and let the memories flow. It was a good time in my life, the best of times.
It was so quiet in the church that my memories sounded loud and slowly I shook off the memories and watched the Pastor walking toward me to sit in the pew in front of me. In a soft but deep voice he asked if I was alright. I told him that as a child I was here every Sunday. Once I started, I couldn’t stop. I told him about leaving the farm and moving to Myrtle Beach. Slowly with effort, the good and the bad of the past five years came out along with the joy, the pain, the loneliness, and the emptiness I felt that forced me to stop playing music.
The Church went quiet as I fought the tears that filled my eyes and finally I told him that I had tried everything without result, so I was going home to my family. He told me he was happy for me and asked to say a prayer for the journey home and then he said, “If I might ask this one more thing, try Jesus.”
He walked me to my van and I knew before midnight I would be home again, with family and new beginning.
In this episode, we invited Sunday Times Bestselling Author and Executive Coach Jamie Smart back on the show to talk about the principles behind clarity and his 10th Anniversary edition book with the same name. We came across the principles behind clarity back in 2015. Since then, it has transformed our personal lives and allowed us to have more impact in our work with leaders, teams, and organisations.
I ran
Like a wild beast
Into the night
Not able to expel
Whatever it was
That was at the
Root of my fright!
Parenting can be one of the most rewarding and fulfilling experiences in life, but it can also be one of the most challenging. A family crisis, mental health issues, and a global pandemic can add to the everyday experiences that are a normal part of growing up can present difficult circumstances to navigate for a child. During these stormy times, it can be easy to feel stressed and uncertain as a parent. However, there are two approaches that you can take to guide your child in these stormy waters: being a lifeboat and being a lighthouse.
Being a LifeboatBeing a lifeboat means providing a safe and secure place for your child during difficult times. It means being there for them when they need you, providing them with stability and reassurance, and helping them weather the storm.
However, being a lifeboat can be challenging. It can be emotionally draining to constantly support and care for your child when they are struggling. You may feel like you are drowning in their emotions and concerns.
To be an effective lifeboat, it’s essential to take care of yourself first. Logosynthesis offers a simple, repeatable technique that you can use to recognize where you are struggling and shift distressing issues to feel better. By doing so, you can gain a sense of calm and clarity that enables you to be there for your child.
A key benefit of using Logosynthesis to feel calmer is that you are better able to recognize when you need to extend the lifeboat for your child. Rather than reacting to every issue, you become a more effective lifeboat for your child by providing them with the support and stability they need. This is where being a lighthouse is important.
Being a LighthouseBeing a lighthouse means providing guidance and direction for your child during difficult times. It means helping them navigate the stormy waters of life by shining a light to offer direction and to identify obstacles. To be an effective lighthouse, it’s essential that your light shines steady and bright. Again, this means that is important to take care of yourself first.
Your child can feel when you are worried, stressed, and overwhelmed. When you react towards your child from a position of frustration, anger, or doubt, your child not only doesn’t have access to the lifeboat but doesn’t have the clarity of the lighthouse. It is very normal to be concerned about your child in difficult times and yet when you can calm your concern, your child will feel better able to make their own way forward.
Navigating stormy watersParenting in stormy waters can be challenging, but by recognizing what is bothering you, you can shift your reactions to offer a greater sense of security and a stronger guiding light. By being both a lifeboat and a lighthouse, you can help your child navigate through difficult times. Logosynthesis offers a unique solution to support you through these challenges. By taking care of yourself first, you can be the best possible support and guide for your child when they need you most. When your guiding light shines strong, you can better appreciate your child’s resilience and ability to make their way on their own.
Resources are availableRemember that it is normal to feel the challenges that your child experiences and to kick into react mode when your child is struggling. By doing your own work first using Logosynthesis, you will notice subtle, yet significant, results. If you are interested in learning more about Logosynthesis as a healthy lifestyle practice to support you in work and life, visit thehealthylivingplan.com.
A big issue with cancer can be: How does one navigate life when you or a loved one gets cancer? How does life move forward? How do family members deal with one of their members getting cancer? Undoubtedly, this can create a very difficult situation for everyone!
When someone gets cancer, it generally takes a team to help navigate the situation. Love is unquestionably important. Allowing a cancer patient to help navigate the journey is important as well. Greg Fobbs lost his brother, who he loved dearly, and was very close to while battling his own demons. This is is a story of triumph, in the end, and how this man survived and learned from this horrible experience.
Here are Greg’s links:
- https://zenbe.co/ https://zenbe.co/resumes
- https://zenbe.co/try https://zenbe.co/blog
- https://zenbe.co/pricing
- https://zenbe.co/codething
- https://www.linkedin.com/in/gregory-f…
Join us for this riveting interview!
During the years that I have studied the law of attraction and our essential nature, I’ve faithfully used many affirmations. One of my favourites is the abridged version of the passage found in Matthew 17:20:
If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove, and nothing shall be impossible unto you.
If the statement that “nothing shall be impossible unto you” seems too good to be true, please continue reading with an open mind. My initial interpretation of the passage was based upon a much more limited perspective; but now I know–not just believe–that all things are truly possible through God. As each of us is unique, the circumstantial mountains that we might desire to be removed will be different. For some persons, it might be a health issue or financial problem. For others, it could be a career challenge or conflict within a relationship. Whatever the nature of mountain we face, greater understanding plays a tremendously important role in removing it.
The biggest issue that all of us face is our own ignorance (meaning unawareness) of the nature of the world and our true Being. The majority of persons are unaware of their essential nature, but they are also unaware that they are unaware. Thus, they (as the apparent person) struggle against circumstances that often seem insurmountable. This was certainly the case with me. To gain greater clarity, we must let go of our assumptions and know REALITY as it IS. Let’s dive deeper into the subject by reading the following content from various books:
The Wish Fulfilled, by Neville Goddard
Before I Am, by Mooji
I Am That, Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj
Living Truth, by Jean Klein
What you have read in the quotations is true. The reason why mountains can be moved by our belief is that they are “dream” mountains, made of mind. What we habitually affirm (through our thoughts, beliefs and actions) is confirmed as our apparent reality; but when we change our beliefs and attitudes, our problems are compelled to change. The well-known placebo effect illustrates this perfectly. When a patient has absolute faith that a medication or procedure will work, the treatment WORKS! The principle related to belief is shared in the Bible in Matthew 9:29, through the following words spoken by Jesus:
“According to your faith be it unto you.”
To move our apparent personal mountains, it’s vitally important that we realize that we are–literally–not the body-mind (person). Such goes against every last bit of our mental conditioning. Therefore, we cannot possibly be the doer of actions. We are Awareness dreaming an apparently human life. This is also related in the Bible, in Acts 17:28:
“For in him we live, and move, and have our being.”
The depth of this is more easily comprehended by contemplating that we also believe–with absolute certainty–that we are the doers during our nighttime dreams. Of course, when the dream ends, we realize that such couldn’t possibly have been the case–that all of the fantastic adventures, or scary situations, were rendered via the mind. Any actions that seemed to have been performed, occurred within a dream. The same holds true for this, the waking state. In Truth, we are the witness only.
Most Beings who are tightly bound to egoic identity will find the content of this article impossible to believe or, perhaps, even ludicrous; but its Truth may be known directly via the practice of self-inquiry. Are you absolutely certain that you are the person? Can you actually be a name, or a body form that is changing moment to moment?
It took years for me to comprehend the nature of our mountains. The biggest challenge was my own lack of understanding. Perhaps you will also realize that you’ve been attempting to move mountains through an illusory character, instead of via the real YOU. Wouldn’t it be easier to let God within do it for you, and open yourself to life more abundant?
Dare to dream (and care for one another).
With heartfelt regards,
Art
Madness to one is brilliance to another.
Degrees on a scale.
An emotional crisis can upset the balance we negotiate between sick and healthy.
Always in my being has been the knowing:
Don’t let them test you.
Don’t let them know you dream while awake.
The projections of others are weighty and enough to drive anyone mad who has recognized their own individuality.
Artists, writers, inventors, people involved in creative pursuits bringing ideas from the stars into the physical world.
— we have more latitude to explore the boundaries of what others call madness and to live beyond the limits of normal.
Don’t let them test you.
Don’t let them know you dream while awake.
Resilience is the ability to bounce back from difficult circumstances, and it is a necessary component of a well-adjusted life. If that’s something you struggle with, then it can be exhausting figuring out how to build your resilience up from scratch. Building resilience takes time, effort, and patience. It’s not something that happens overnight. But by incorporating these tips into your daily life, you’ll be on your way to becoming more resilient and better able to handle the challenges that come your way.
“We must be willing to let go of the life we planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us.”
–Joseph Campbell
Learn How to Self-SootheChildren rely on the people around them to handle their emotions. Seeing a crying child run into the arms of their parents makes sense to us because we’ve seen that sort of scene play out countless times throughout our life. In order to be a reasonably collected adult, we have to know how to comfort the crying child within.
- Take care of your physical health. One of the simplest and most powerful ways to Self-Soothe is by performing your acts of daily living, such as brushing your teeth, eating three meals a day, and exercising regularly.
- Take care of your mental health. When we’re in the throes of emotional anguish, it isn’t easy to devise a mental health care plan on the spot. That’s why in order to address your own mental health, you need to have a toolkit.
- Follow your fiery passion. There’s a reason that tortured artists endure their torturous emotions. It’s because they are intensely passionate about their art. Find what you’re passionate about, and make room for it in your life. No matter how grim things might appear, your passion can be the light in the darkness.
Cultivate A Positive MindsetHaving a sense of optimism can be a powerful coping tool. But optimism doesn’t come from anywhere. In order to interpret the world around you charitably, it becomes almost necessary to cultivate a positive mindset.
- Practice gratitude. Regularly speak, write, and think about what you’re grateful for. Don’t take the good in your life for granted.
- Reframe your negative thoughts. Recognize your unhelpful thoughts, and try to replace them with a more charitable interpretation of the situation. Don’t let the gloom in your life become a wallowing sort of place.
- Surround yourself with support. Reach out to your loved ones for help. Help them understand what you’re going through, and how you’d like to be supported.
Be Open To ChangeThe truth is, the biggest obstacle in the way of our personal growth is ourselves. You are the only person who can make meaningful changes in your adult life. But that means being open to new experiences and embracing your opportunities to learn and grow.
- Don’t beat yourself up. Often when we make an error, we engage in negative self-talk like calling ourselves insults so that we “learn the lesson”, but this negative self-talk doesn’t really help us grow. If we focus on how we could be better instead of where we’ve failed, we’re more motivated to make a change.
- Be flexible. An excellent way to be resilient is through adapting to your environment. You might be the only thing in your life that is fully within your control, but that’s quite a lot of control if you think about it.
- Try new things. Having a routine is great. Many of the tips within this very article boil down to just the pure value of having a solid routine. But staying forever within those routines can be a mind-numbing resilience killer. Put yourself out there, and experience the novelty of doing something different.
Positivity is a word that has come to the fore, not only projecting a can-do attitude but ‘infecting’ others with opportunities and confidence they never realised they could accomplish.
Positivity is a meaningful word, much used in articles, but I am merely presenting my belief in the hidden energy that is within us and how to illuminate a darkened space in our consciousness and subliminally hidden energy.
Being positive when everything seems to go wrong, is challenging, to say the least.
The more doubt entering the mind and heart makes optimism and positivity almost alien ideals.
To be honest, not every individual would be inwardly visited by such positive thoughts resulting in action.
However, negativity and being void of optimism can extend to a low level of as if slowly descending into a pit of darkness.
AND NOW SOME POSITIVITY!Find a location of calmness away from the everyday stresses of depression and lack of confidence you are experiencing.
Positivity is best created when it is derived from your own heart, rather than relying on other individuals, however genuine they be.
Positivity is self-driven. Positivity comes from the heart. Identify the tiniest element of your life; focus on it. Reveal to yourself what is so good about it; dwell on it and find a link to another positive element. Gradually positivity will potentially advance. And don’t dwell on the past. Be forward-thinking.
You have achieved positivity.
Any negative thoughts or elements that visit will be dealt with optimistically as you have proved possible.
Positivity and optimism are infectious, projecting energy and empathy. You’ll make a difference as you are the difference.
A Beacon of Positivity
I once had a life that was filled with action.
Working in Times Square, there was always something “happening.”
Someone would be having a mental illness. There would be a suspicious package. Naked women with pasties on their tits. Guys selling weed. Lots of Elmo suits. Gas leaks. Jackhammers. Break dancing. Painters. People exercising on the scaffolding. “Gang Initiation.” (In the 2000- early 2010’s it happened every Easter Sunday- here’s a NY Times article about it)
You could say that I was always overstimulated, but I was completely stagnant.
After my shift each night in over-stimulation, I went and drank. Multiple shots and beers. 4:30 a.m. I’d roll into the street, smoke way too many cigarettes, and topple myself into a cab.
My friend Jim used to say “we’re Beats,” and how right was he?
Through all of that, my drunken nights, and the times I shared with people during this hyperactive, hyper-stimulated period of my existence, nothing was happening.
I mean sure, that’s an exaggeration. We can’t have complete inaction, despite my best attempts at it. But in terms of my deepening my relationship with myself, and getting closer to who I wanted to be? Very little of that happened while I was drunk at the bar.
Most of the time when I was drinking at the bar, it was with many people who were essentially “warm bodies.” I had a few friends and a zillion acquaintances. I wasn’t really interested in the conversation. It was mostly about 1. other people (who cares?) 2. our job (replaying the what happened) or 3. things that didn’t interest me (like movies) After about two hours, those conversations became more like dribble (as all drunken convos do) where we would just take turns “speaking at” one another.
For all the times I spent bonding with people, I never really was. I remember getting a lot off my chest, because when you’re drunk, you’re just blithering ego. I don’t remember too much of what anyone else said, and my guess is, they don’t remember too much of what I said. Nothing profound came out of those times.
When you’re out drinking, nothing enjoyable is happening that requires the drink. And if something enjoyable is happening, the thing that you’re enjoying is not the booze. The thing you’re enjoying is being dulled by the booze, because your entire human experience is being dulled by the booze.
For example: Drinking at the beach- what are you enjoying? The beach.
What is happening when you drink at the beach? You become a dehydrated clam baking in the sun. You grossly have to piss in the polluted ocean once an hour. You dry out passed out on a towel. You end up eating something later like a ravenous rat and don’t taste the food you order. You wake up the next day with a headache and a sunburn, and you don’t remember how you got home.
What takes away from enjoying the tranquility of the beach? The 6 nutcrackers you bought from some guy who made them in his dirty kitchen.
Annie Grace says that 80% of people who drink wish they drank less.
Andee Scarantino says from her experience, that’s true.
People come to me all the time and tell me “I just want to be done,” and then somehow, the excuses start coming in.
People want to “defend” their decisions because the word sobriety holds the same weight in our society as the word God.
Both of the words provoke STRONG reactions that make people DEFEND THEIR POSITION.
“Ohhh I’m not drinking but I don’t have a problem.”
Literally, nobody asked you that. As MartinJon says, “sobriety is a beverage choice.”
When you drink heavily all the time, you f__k yourself out of being able to enjoy your own life to the capacity you want to enjoy it.
We’re not in third grade. We don’t need other people to understand or dictate what we drink at lunchtime. We don’t need to tell Chad over there why we don’t like milk. We just don’t drink it.
My experience is, when you’re wishy-washy and afraid to say you’re not drinking, people may try to coax you into having one. This is because they believe that your experience won’t be as enjoyable without alcohol.
But when you’re firm, people respect it. Honestly, they’re a little bit jealous. None of us truly likes to drink. We were sold a bill of goods.
We really only like our life experiences, and everyone wishes they could enjoy those in a more uninhibited state of clarity.
Today’s podcast is all about this. If you’re sober curious, it’s here for you. The typical bag of hot air to start your week.
I hope you all had a great weekend.
Stay Beautiful
Andee
Last week I shared about living in the state of a spa day, and then this week has perfectly provided the opportunity to show the permanence of that state — including in the experience of feeling like a failure. Over the course of the week, I’ve been asked the question — is that really how it is? Is life really lovely like that all the time? Underlying which there is a hint of — I don’t believe you.
Quite rightly ‘I don’t believe you’ because we know in our hearts that it’s unnatural to float through life, absent of any emotion to what’s going on.
So this week I’m bringing an important distinction and nuance to the experience of ‘living in the state of a spa day’. The distinction between a background knowing, and a foreground experience.
This last week has been one of my toughest for a long time. It began in earnest on Monday when I meditated and saw my deepest fear. It’s expressed as a statement of fact, as though there is no doubt in it whatsoever: ‘there is something fundamentally wrong with you’.
This began a couple of weeks ago when at that point it was expressed as ‘I am not good enough — I am getting it wrong’. I thought that was the core of it, but it seems like this week’s has been that: ‘there is something fundamentally wrong with you’. I saw how these ‘statements of fact’ were overlaid with slightly flimsier thoughts: ‘Am I good enough? Am I doing it right?’ Almost as though the mind was scrambling in desperation to find evidence to counter these seeming ‘facts’.
And I saw again how my life has been one of busy and doing and getting it right (you might remember I mentioned that in last week’s post too). All in order to try and hide from, or run away from, or find the counter-evidence to these scary thoughts. An attempt to ‘do enough’ in order to prove the thoughts wrong, in order to fill the chasm between being wrong and being right, between not being good enough and being enough.
It makes alot of logical sense for this behaviour to happen, when we think we have to, and have been taught to, find enough-ness outside of ourselves. But when we begin to glimpse that enough-ness (the spa day state) is our nature already, the system begins to slow down and, what looked like logic, starts to be seen as futile.
In the relaxation into this, as our permanent, background-knowing becomes the spa-day-state of enough-ness, the foreground psychological patterns are more easily revealed, allowing the layers to evaporate and evaporate and evaporate as they’re seen and seen and seen. But as the foreground evaporation and seeing happens, it doesn’t always feel like the beautiful, calm feelings of the spa day. If anything, you’re opened to feel more. You’re invited to come out of limitation and back into fullness. The veils of denial and avoidance fall and fall, inviting you to look, and look. Look at how it really is. Look at what you’ve been running from.
And all of it made possible because of living in the state of a spa day.That state — ever-present as my sure-footed ground of being — gives me the solidity and stability to hold these experiences that have looked too much or too big or too ugly or too shameful before now.
It gives me the capacity to look my deepest fear right in the eye. To see that it’s just some words that have been taken as saying something about me. To see that all I find when I look for the ‘me’ is an open, expansive, untouched space of OK-ness. To feel the feelings that accompany that fear that have wanted to come out and move and stretch their legs for ages! But which have been kept shut in a cupboard marked ‘too dangerous’.
To feel the feelings and not immediately jump into dismissal, or avoidance, or covering-over strategies ‘La la la! Nothing to see here! It’s all good!’ — has been the standard strategy in the years till now.
But the game is up. The endless chase must stop. And the only way forward is to turn around and look, instead of run.
Background vs ForegroundWhat this means is that this last week has had the spa day state as my background. It never leaves. It doesn’t go. It doesn’t change. But the foreground experience — boy has that changed. Frequently. It included all the ups and downs. And it has demonstrated beyond doubt that my experience is created as a result of what’s happening within me. Like large, rolling waves, I’ve been going from the depths of fear up to the heights of beauty.
These are all feelings that have — for most of my life — been kept at arm’s length. Because to let them in might prove the fears true. I really am wrong. I really am not good enough.
Now there’s this openness to them being felt.
And so I’ve been going from the depths of it feels bad, I feel bad, things look bad, ‘you’re wrong’. Seeming evidence of this popping up everywhere. Clients going, contracts ending, feeling let down, feedback telling me I’m getting it wrong. Sadness, disappointment, shame, feelings of failure and dejectedness. The world created perfectly in alignment with what was happening within me in that moment.
Then up into the heights: it feels seamless and easy. I feel fulfilled, open, and free. Beautiful, spontaneous, unsolicited feedback and gratitude given to me and received more deeply than ever before. Appearing left, right, and centre for no apparent reason. The world created perfectly in alignment with what was happening within me in that moment.
Then down into a dip again. And me and the world showing up as bad again. Unable to be looked away from. Unable to be distracted from. Like my head held steady to see it all. My body held steady to feel it all. No excuses. No avoiding. No covering it over with more doing or action to make it look like everything’s OK.
Up and down. My experience in the world oscillating in parallel with the inner.
And now, gradually reducing and reducing in height over the last day. Not because I’ve tried to reduce it. It’s just what waves do. And being in the waves, allowing them to carry me, it feels like I’m now getting closer to the shore. The waves are diminishing.
And the background spa-day-state has remained throughout.
It doesn’t go. It doesn’t leave.
And so this is where living in the state of a spa day is incredibly powerful.As you can see from what I’ve shared here, living as this state doesn’t remove all the ups and downs of experience. It doesn’t take away all the challenges. It doesn’t lead to a neutrality with life. You’re not floating along saying ‘om’ and feeling equanimous about all that you see and experience.
What it does instead is provide you with the strong foundation in the background, within which you can then feel and experience all of the foreground. Ideas you’ve had that you have to run away from half of your experience can fall away, and you therefore no longer need to exhaust yourself or impact your relationships in the process.
Then, in moving through it, the imagined limits and dangers can never quite look the same again. I’ve obviously not tested that theory yet with this current experience, but I’ve seen it many times before.
Once you’ve seen the coiled rope is a rope, not a snake, you stop feeling scared of it.
And the veil of that fear falls away.
Revealing a clearer view and a deeper sense of the state of a spa day.
That for which we all long.
That which you already are.
With love, Helen
Hey, there! AmyK here.Dropping in from San Jose del Cabo. I’ve been witnessing a lot of magic these last few weeks. Watch this quick video for how you can generate more magic in your life too. To creating everyday magical miracles … one conversation at a time.
Hugs, AmyK
I wonder whether I inherently possess any fire
I am utterly engulfed with an unrestrained ire
I am craving to infuse myself with energy
Along with other in the ambiance I am living with synergy
Life itself is ephemeral
But the continuity of evolved matters exist which is eternal
Change alone determine how a matter evolve
Human brain only capable to capture such transition with a distinct role!
We need to concentrate only on a single matter
That only makes huge clatter
That is the human brain
That only enables us to script all matters configuration with an amazing train!
Centuries long a process we human inherently possess
Not knowing how our brain act with continuity to ingress
This is what we define as progress
Decimating majority by denying the fruits of development to access.
We are conversant with fire
Which kindle light with flame to symbolize a sign of aspire
It contains a prism effect
Scattering light to stimulate and energize myriad
Human civilization progressed with huge acceleration
Where utterances of myriad find their presence in nature’s floor with sheer jubilation!
Huge, huge and huge
Only usher to make deluge
Where old are washed away
New usher with sheer gay
Change is the only continuum
Makes a nature’s adhered referendum!
Fire and water both are essential to us
To ensure out entity from sunshine to sun set in chorus
Making our available ambiance delightful
Where we all living beings thrive in colorful!
Sound, heat and light
Enamored us with utter delight
How can we segregate one to highlight
Where all ingredients express their gravity with might
Nature’s floor is a grand surface
Where all creatures express their entity in behest!
I didn’t crack a book or look at a note card or practice any skills that first week of break. I enjoyed not worrying about the upcoming Saturday and dealing with four hours of mental anguish and then having an hour to get home, eat, change and get to work. I had an entire week to devote to learning and practicing a few range of motion exercises. Easy peasy. I figured I’d start on the following Sunday.
ENJOY ALL PRIOR PARTS HERE︎
Certifiable (Part 3)
I indeed started looking at the instructions on Sunday for the range of motion exercises. Not too difficult. OK, I’ll make proper note cards tomorrow, I thought to myself. Monday came and I got lazy and skipped making note cards or practicing the terms used in the exercises. Mondays are a tough work day in particular, so I decided I’d take it easy before work knowing what I had to look forward to later.
Tuesday came, and it was my first day off. I slept in like I usually do on my first day off. I ate and waited a bit, went down to the gym for a little exercise, showered, took a nap, and then it was too late to do any studying as I had to get ready for our buddy’s newly freed-of-a-cancer diagnosis party, at a favorite martini bar. I tested the number of martinis I could safely have without the inevitable hangover the following day and failed, badly. So, consequently, Wednesday was a bust in terms of studying.
Hmmm… Ok, there was still time, I thought. Thursday arrived and I felt human again. I put in a concentrated effort and make my notecards, memorize the steps, memorize the terms, and review my green notebook one more time and SH*T!, WHAT?, how did I not see “feeding” on my list of skills for the last class? Ugh, ok, well, I’ll study again after we come back from our weekly Thursday happy hour wine bar get together with 20-30 of our pals. Thursday evening arrives, post happy hour, and I am absolutely not interested in studying. Que the slow but consistent flood of anxiety I can start to feel as the time ticks away toward Saturday.
Friday came, and it was the start of my work schedule again. I used the morning to make the note card for feeding but didn’t practice the steps or memorize anything about the skill. I told myself I’d wake up tomorrow early and put in a couple of hours before class. Friday is the busiest and craziest time at work of the entire schedule, but there’s two of us behind the bar so it’s more manageable than when I’m by myself. Friday night usually ends with a meal at home and staying up late while I let my head calm down from the buzz of going 100mph behind the bar. I also let my body digest the food, as I did that night, while I thought about how I maybe shouldn’t have wasted that first week of break.
I woke up early on Saturday and re-studied the skills I had to know, though I was nowhere as ready to demonstrate the skill for “feeding” as I was for the ROM exercises.
I got ready and headed to class. I arrived and settled in while the others arrived and took their seats. Someone asked the instructor how it all went at her father’s funeral. She let out a deep, “oohhhh, too much drama!”…and dropped it.
The first part of the classroom portion was us exchanging about 8 quizzes with each other that we were expected to take during the first three weeks of class. The instructor waited about two minutes and then startled rattling off the answers to the quizzes. We graded each other’s quizzes and indicated the correct answer if someone answered incorrectly.
After the quiz grading, we all went back to the skills room. It is at this point, she took us all again, for probably the 8th time for real, and showed us again, how to properly wash our hands.
We all sat down again and she said, “OK, who has Range of Motion, let’s go, c’mon, no wasting time… Ryan, come, be the patient.” What, why me? She told me to get into the bed nearest her and lie down. I had become Ms. Suzie, our full size plastic manipulatable patient.
The first person attempted the exercise and of course, failed at most of the steps, but the instructor is less harsh on this Saturday. She hadn’t become Ms. Geniality or anything, but she just asked the student to step aside and she started doing the skills on me herself. But, she couldn’t help but feel my inability to relax my limbs, and kept telling me to relax, like simply telling me to do so was going to do it. I felt like an absolute ragdoll and could not for the life of me “relax” any more than I felt I was, but she kept insisting I was too stiff. It became a bit of a joke and offered some levity for the situation but it was eye opening to me that she could feel I was tense. I’m probably more obvious than I think, but I definitely tried to let go mentally and go limp physically with my entire body, but it apparently wasn’t happening.
A couple of more students tried practicing on me, with varying degrees of success. I blamed it on the patient.
After ROM, the instructor had us redo the vitals skills. I went second and from indirect care to the “end skills” (common end steps attributed to every skill, no matter what), I carried them out just about perfectly. So much so, the instructor laughed when I finished by saying, “I am finished with this skill” which is the way you end all skills, and said, “Perfect, Ryan, you pass entire exam.” A rare glimpse of humor from the instructor, and everyone giggled a bit.
After everyone did the vitals skills, there was about an hour and change remaining in the class and she asked if anyone had questions. No one spoke up at first and she started in with the sarcasm, “So, everyone is perfect on every skill, any one of you can do Peri-care, Footcare, Transfer the patient, Mouth/dentures care, Feeding, Partial bed bath, Catheter care – you all have no questions and can do each of these, and all the rest perfectly, yes?” Sheepishly, people started asking a few questions, and I asked a question about bedpan changing. A few others asked questions and then that became what we were going to do for the remainder of the class, which was whoever asked the question would attempt that skill. Oh man, I just walked back into a trap. It’d been two weeks since I did the bedpan thing and I never did it totally successfully in class. I started to sweat again but others were called before me, and when it finally got to my turn, the instructor said there wasn’t enough time, so she’d just do it.
The class ended with her handing out folders that contained the certificate we received for completing the class. Though it’s not worth much beyond the paper it’s printed on, I gave myself a thumb’s up for sticking through it when I didn’t feel it was doing for me what I hoped it might. Upon leaving class for the last time, the instructor called out to me and said I owed her lunch after I took and passed the certification exam. I think she might be waiting a long while.
I came to the realization that while I could and would offer this type of care for people I cared about, I don’t think I have it in me emotionally to carry out this work as a profession. I have deep appreciation for people who commit their working lives to be in service to others, especially in roles like these, where the need for genuine compassion is just as important as the actual care.
With that, I offer my thanks and gratitude to all who work in a caregiver role, a demanding but critically needed service which all too often goes thankless.
Bob Harris, CAE, suggests that a nonprofit’s DNA consists of five elements. ** Following are my thoughts on how they can be applied, if a nonprofit board wants to develop an understanding of the “real world” applications of the Harris DNA elements. This needs to take place prior to the planning efforts.
Board Structure: Nonprofit boards must effectively operate with a series of board committees. The number of committees varies widely. I have observed some with as few as three committees and others with as many as 15 committees. The latter group rationalizes the number by suggesting board member involvement leads to better understanding of missions, vision, and values. More desirable board candidates live time-compressed work and lifestyles and can’t become involved with committees that meet without defined charters or try to micromanage management decisions.
Three to about six committees seems to be optimal for a mature board in the 21st century. A startup board will require more committees to allow board members to assume operational roles. One warning! If this large committee DNA format is allowed to carry over into maturity, it can lead to a dominating board that will be difficult to change.
Strategy: “A Board must act strategically—not tactically” ** In terms of its DNA, strategy must be the “lifeblood” that helps relate all major decisions to the nonprofit’s mission.
Start-up nonprofits often focus on tactical discussions at Board meetings. Founders and board members must address tactical issues because board members have two responsibilities. They must govern and act as part or full-time staff. But as the organization matures it becomes essential to fashion all agendas on policy/strategy issues. The responsibility for action resides with the Board Chair and CEO. The Board Chair, however, has a special obligation to proactively discourage lengthy discussions of tactical issues, frequently characterized as “weed discussions.” It should be emphasized that these are operational and management responsibilities, not Board agenda items.
Sustainability: This factor involves several critical keystones. First is the sustainability of income sources. If, for example, the nonprofit is heavily dependent on governmental funding, to what extent is the nonprofit able to secure private and foundation sources should governmental support abruptly decline? Managers and audit committee members need to be continually alert to seeking new funding sources.
A second keystone involves succession planning. The Board has direct responsibility for CEO succession and must overview staff succession. The latter involves knowing who among staff personnel are promotable, or, with training, be able to fill managerial positions. In my opinion, most nonprofit boards don’t provide significant overview attention to staff promotions.
Relatively short board terms or tenures for most board members (4-6 years) allow the board to introduce new thinking. However, they may not motivate board members to come to grips with issues related to long-term sustainability. Board members are traditionally active for one planning cycle, assuming strategic planning takes place every three to five years. From a sustainability perceptive, this restricts discussions of DNA changes that may impact stakeholders in the seven to ten-year time frames.
Relevance: Two keystones are also important here. First clients and funders must be able to perceive that the nonprofit is fulfilling its mission with integrity and a focus on stakeholder satisfaction.
The second involves maintaining a strongly committed board. To achieve this goal, the Board Chair and CEO must take actions to make certain that each board member perceives that her/h contributions are meaningful. These perceptions can only be determined from candid conversations with each board member. It’s the responsibility of both the Board Chair and CEO to annually assess that each board member is involved with meaningful activities.
Unlike humans, the DNA of nonprofit organizations can change with careful interpersonal adjustments.
For example, assumed it is desirable to have emergency client services available 24/7 instead of the normal 40-hour working week. Then management and staff should work together to modify the DNA (fair scheduling hours, etc.,) to accommodate the change.
Performance: The approaches to assessing the value of nonprofits have recently changed. Focus has changed from assessing program outcomes to assessing program impacts. ***
Program objectives can be achieved, but they can have little impact on clients’ lives. For example, marriage counseling can be helpful in eliminating symptoms of problems to meet client satisfaction, but the results may lack impact because they don’t address the problems’ root causes. Data analysts are being employed by some nonprofits to model impact information that is being requested by foundations and donors. The task, however, can take a long time to implement.
Suggestion: Most well-run nonprofits review their missions, visions, and values every three to five years. A review of their DNA factors, prior to the planning cycle can enhance the process.
- *the term is defined as …having fundamental and distinctive characteristics,
- **https://www.linkedin.com/in/bob-harris-cae-76ba151b/
- ***https://www.nytimes.com/2019/11/22/your-money/ratings-charities.html
You know, people here (on Medium) are starting to suck, big time. Take the writer who works as a vet tech and has written story after story detailing her problems with co-workers, clients, and the Universe as a whole. We all have problems, some direr than others, so I empathize. Hell. I’m a frazzled mess these days.
I followed the writer because I adore animals and was interested in how she was able to remain relatively sane in a profession where one must experience so much sadness on a daily basis. I’ll go a step further and say that I had mad respect for her as I’m a total wimp where animals are concerned. To care for people’s beloved pets who are sick or injured or need to be peacefully ushered into the next life must be relentlessly heartbreaking.
A recent piece by this writer centered around people who share their lives and homes with both prey and predator animals, such as rats and cats. Or snakes and rodents of any kind. You get the picture.
She shared an incident in her clinic where an eight-week-old kitten was brought in, badly injured after its owners decided it was time to introduce the wee baby to their pet rats. Now, in fairness, the rats did not bite the kitten, but young as it may be, that kitten is still a predator and being such, thrust its little paw into the cage, got stuck, and when she was finally able to pull it out, the paw was covered in blood and she was “howling in pain.”
Apparently, the clueless owners thought that if they raised the kitten around those rats, she’d be less inclined to hunt them. What the f__k is wrong with people? Note my link to an older story of mine that begs an answer to this question.
As a result of the enforced “bonding,” between predator and prey, one of the kitten’s claws was ripped clean off, requiring surgery, and going forward, she may experience ongoing discomfort due to the f__ktards who were supposed to protect and care for her.
Now, this writer got her panties in a serious twist when I commented that I thought the kitten’s owners should be forced to rehome her, and, that I thought their actions bordered on animal abuse.
People, if you’re going to have cats and rats, rather, predator and prey, in the same household, grow a friggin’ brain cell, yeah?
But, what is really upsetting is that the writer jumped down my throat for commenting the way I did. How dare I bring up animal abuse when that wasn’t the case and she sees it every day and BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. And I’m just a big, f__king idiot who, even though I’ve lived with animals my entire life, knows nada.
To this writer, I say, “screw you.” I stand by my opinion and believe the kitten’s owners are a couple of dumb f__ks who should share their lives with cacti instead of animals.
Also, even though this individual has written countless stories detailing every problem and challenge she’s ever faced, I’ve been nothing but sympathetic. I’ve left supportive comments on her articles and in return, what do I get? A nasty, public put-down.
Adding insult to injury, she never reads or comments on my stories, which she attributes to her being so busy, unlike an unemployed slug of a fossil like me. Ergo, I stopped following her and no doubt will be blocked.
And just to clarify, I referenced “self-professed” in my subtitle as that is how this individual comes off.
I’m sharing this with you so that newer writers, especially, will understand this important tenet: Your readers are not here to agree with you. If you choose to share certain experiences that others may have opinions on, that don’t jibe with yours, get over yourselves and suck them up. Thank them for their comment, reiterate your point if you feel it necessary, and move on.
I’ll add a disclaimer here and say that anyone who disagrees with a writer’s take on a particular issue or subject, needs to be respectful in their point-counterpoint. Your knee-jerk reaction, fueled by emotion, will only make you look like an asshole. Trust me. I know.
And, we don’t need any more self-important putzes on Medium, do we?
So, that’s it. It’s a shame that my opinion went down the way it did, but, C’est la vie. And I still believe the following: If you’re going to force the issue with pets that are both prey and predator, expect that there will be blood.
Diane is a story artist. She’ll tell you a story to ‘listen a story out of you’. For example, she muses “Remember the first time you rode a bike and took your hands off the handlebars? And then because it felt fun and scary you did it again until you were streaking down a hill with the wind blowing in your face and your hands up over your head screaming, “Look ma! No hands!” That’s been the story of my life. Showing up – maybe scared but not afraid – because you fall down 7 and get up 8.”
As Ipek Williamson (Insight Coach and Meditation Teacher) commented “Being in her presence is like quenching your thirst that you didn’t even know you had with infinitely refreshing water.” We’ll be covering and discovering connectedness, community, creativity, and potentially how to discover what real honest dyed-in-the-wool leadership presence looks like to us.
A recognized global podcaster, (Stories From Women Who Walk & Daily 60 Seconds) Diane shares wisdom and interviews designed to help others become successful story creators; a Speaker and Founder of Engaged Storyism® Method, and Quarter Moon Story Arts (her consulting space), Diane helps people find the words, they didn’t know they had so they can get their marketing, messaging, presentation, origin story image out of their head and into the world to connect & succeed.
I search for silence from the noise
the noise that takes over –
my space, my thoughts, my life
I need to retreat
to retreat
to silence, to space
for me, to find me
away from the noise
that encroaches on my everyday life
my heart, my soul …
cries out for freedom
freedom to be
freedom to breathe
freedom to rest
freedom to love, freely,
freedom.
ABOUT THIS EPISODEFrom Fear to Fire: Secrets to Overcome Fear, Embrace your Gifts, and Achieve Success. This is the place where real people share real challenges. Where you can find a common bond and uncommon wisdom through their stories. Use tips from the breakthroughs of others to jump-start your success. Speaker, author, adventurer, and host Heather Hansen O’Neill takes you on the journey from fear to fire. Today we talk about neurodivergence and understanding that you are more than enough.
This week’s theme: NeurodivergenceNeurodivergence, also known as neurodiversity, is an umbrella term for various neurological conditions and cognitive differences. Despite the challenges, many neurodivergent people have unique strengths that can be used to make a meaningful and productive contribution to society.
Neurodivergence is not a deficit, but rather a benefit. People who are neurodivergent have a special set of abilities, perspectives, and strengths that are frequently overlooked in conventional educational and professional settings. Creating a friendly and inspiring environment is crucial if we want neurodivergent people to realize their full value and potential. This entails giving people access to resources, assistance, and comprehension. It’s also critical to acknowledge the distinctive skills that people with neurodiversity can bring to the table. By doing this, we may build a more accepting culture of many viewpoints.
Mariah & Byron EdgingtonMariah and Byron Edgington are storytellers & public speakers who enrich audiences with humor, wisdom, and anecdotes taken from their professional lives. In their careers — Byron as a pilot, Mariah as a nurse — they raised people up every day. From this came their Mandate To Elevate. As a Neurodivergent/Neurotypical couple, Mariah & Byron explore differences in relationships as benefits, not deficits. They also speak on mindset, LGBTQi rights, Whole Foods Plant-Based eating, and the power of gratitude. Mariah and Byron have stories about humanity at its worst and best, anecdotes to move you, inspire you, make you laugh, cry, and give you hope. They’re uplifting, heartwarming, funny, and timely program is one you don’t want to miss.
Connect with Byron and Mariah:
Mandate to Elevate website
Or Facebook, Byron’s Linkedin, and Mariah’s LinkedIn
Quote of the Day:
“We rise by lifting others.” Robert Ingersoll
Most visitors to The Kings and Scribes Exhibition at Winchester Cathedral have never heard of Queen Emma. I had also not heard of her until becoming an Exhibition Steward.
Queen Emma was born in Normandy in 984 and passed away in Winchester, on March 6th, 1052. She was the Great Aunt of William the Conqueror of Normandy. (1028 – 1087).
The Battle of Hasting in 1066 is probably the most important year in Britain’s history. The Norman Conquest.
Queen Emma was the daughter of Richard I of Normandy.
She was married twice. Her first husband was the Anglo-Saxon King Aethelred ‘The Unready’ and when he passed away, married Danish King Canute (famous for sitting in a chair at the seafront; tried and failed to stop the tide coming in. It resulted in his feet becoming rather wet.
Queen Emma had two sons: Harthcanut and Edward the Confessor.
She is the only Queen to be Queen twice and the only Queen to have a mortuary chest in Winchester Cathedral.
There are many many ancient buildings in Winchester High Street, one of which is a half-timbered former residence and Queen Emma’s principal home.
‘God Begot House’, now an Italian restaurant. The translation of the name has changed over the centuries and is now thought to be ‘the good getter’. This was her principal home. The building still has the ancient inside structure with beams and a room that is thought to be haunted. The outside frontage is, to say the least, awesome.
Queen Emma and her sons helped to a degree in planning the Norman Conquest of 1066.
Why most people had never heard of her is a mystery. She played such an important role in the history of the Kings and Queens of Winchester.
Winchester is home to the world-famous 1000-year-old Cathedral. And has the longest medieval nave. The Cathedral Contains remains of many ancient monarchs in mortuary chests, including Queen Emma.
Gumshoe never had the opportunity to greet and meet that very deep thinker, Mr. Descartes. He coined the above-listed title Latin phrase that translates to American-speak:
I think, therefore I am.
Gumshoe wonders about just how long it took for Mr. “D” to come up with that profound pithy uttering? Possibly he had his Oprah “Eureka Moment” during his hot yoga class?
Gumshoe also pictures in his mind’s eye if Mr. “D” (sans his toga-like apparel) possibly struck “The Thinker” pose while sitting on a large rock.
Note: Please see Monsieur Auguste Rodin’s sculpture for reference.
Possibly, the hard surface on Mr. D’s posterior caused Mr. D’s mental contemplation to come full circle before “Preparation H” was required on his butt’s physical exertion? “Ouch! That’s one Rubicon he did not want to cross.
Gumshoe also ponders if Mr. “D” had partaken in an unknown quantity of cups of wine that probably killed some of his ancient brain cells but loosened his philosophical Latin tongue?
You must understand dear readers that all street cops come into direct contact with multiple Descartes impersonators on a daily basis whom make mind-puzzling and profound declarations.
To wit:
“I watch TV cop shows officer and I know the law!”
“You can’t arrest me because you don’t have enough PC (probable cause)!”
“You can’t search me (or my car or my house) without a warrant!”
“Why did you stop me and I don’t have to show you any ID!”
“Why don’t you go after real criminals!”
“I’m not drunk Officer, I only had two drinks!”
“I don’t have to do anything you say!”
“The stuff (narcotics, contraband, firearms, evidence) you found is not mine officer!”
“Don’t you know officer who I am?” or “I know your chief!”
“You can’t touch me, officer!”
“I am not going to jail!”
“If you didn’t have that badge, I’ll kick your a!”
Gumshoe’s personal favorite, “I pay your salary officer!”
Please note gentle readers that these “brain-dead Descartes-like individuals always amused Gumshoe.
They never really did think and therefore the handcuffs “clicked-closed” on their “Am I really going to jail?” Therefore, they did!
In closing gentle readers, always remember to love the ones who love you and try to love the ones who don’t.
Coram Deo!
Unused IdeasIt is possible that ideas, hopes, and dreams live in a place where anyone can go. They are like the vast shelves of books in a bookstore. Are our unused ideas like books in a used bookstore still there but just forgotten and waiting to be remembered?
Lost HighwaysI like the lost highways, where time has passed by, leaving its mark then moving on. A moment captured in time, then forgotten. I like the sound of gravel crunching beneath my boots and the sound of a rusty sign swinging in the wind.
I like the intensity of looking into the old men’s eyes that sit in front of the old gas stations and seeing their journey written on their souls.
The ViewWe spend a lifetime striving for all that we can get from life. Often at the expense of missing all the meaningful things that life gives us as gifts. How many times have we promised our self that we would get up early and watch a sunrise, sit out on a porch, and listen to the rain or walk down a country road with someone you love with dogs in tow? We never know how many tomorrows we have left. Choose today to find those moments.
Legend Has ItLife cannot give you courage. It has to come from within. It has to be something that you have faced in life and conquered. Fear is something you must face often in life. It has many faces. It can be personal, business or the fury of nature. Regardless of what it is, life has given you the tools and the knowledge to face anything. It is up to you how you face your fears or rather embrace your courage. As my sister always told me, in life, be strong, be courageous, and be a dragon slayer.
Stories are best when they are shared. We learn by listening and sharing tales of our journey. Each of us has a story to tell, a bit of knowledge to share that will help us along our way.
A different kind of shock rocked me on this particular Saturday. In walked the instructor and gone was the long-flowing-down-her-shoulders hair and in its place was what I now know is a sort of Bantu style of tied knots of hair that some black women choose if they style it short. It was a 100% change and did nothing to soften what was already a hard exterior.
ENJOY ALL PRIOR PARTS HERE︎
Certifiable (Part 2)
Leading up to Saturday 3, I studied a bit more, made notes on note cards, and enlisted John for patient role demonstration skill purposes. We have a small, twin-sized fold-up bed in the rare instances we host more than two overnight guests. I dragged that out and gathered various props that would serve as the needed supplies. John played the role of “patient in coma”, which meant he was not responsive in any way and didn’t provide any “patient help” at all.
“Please, Mr. John, cross your arms, now cross your legs, now shift toward me, now please, Mr. John, roll to your side, and outstretch your arm to support you” – all fell on deaf ears and closed eyes, which meant I was crossing his arms and legs myself, trying to pull him toward me myself (not by the neck!), and pushing him over instead of him rolling himself. “This is how it is in the real world,” smirked John, the immovable patient. “Yes, but for entry CNAs, I doubt they’re going to place them in the Coma ward!, ” I shot back.
I practiced a bit more and knew that I had to know how to dress/redress a patient. But I was a nervous wreck. And this was the first where there was an inkling of internal questioning about why I was putting myself through this; what I hoped to get from it; and whether it was worth it.
The classroom portion came and went and back again, and we found ourselves in the skills demonstration room. I was sitting there and the inkling of doubt turned into a big desire to bolt. I actually sat there and debated on whether to just leave. I wasn’t going to demonstrate my skill to the standard this person was judging, and I was just having anxiety over this entire part. I’ve been a performer on stages for a long time and absolutely love that, but being “on display and subject to criticism” when I’m not as prepared as I’m expected to be is the absolute worst. But therein lies the rub, right? “Not as prepared as I’m expected to be…” I did prepare more for this third round in the ring, and just tried to let go of the expectations part, but I’m not naturally wired that way, and that takes a real conscious everyday-thinking-kind-of-effort to let go of the expectations of others, real or just perceived. But again, I was sitting there and thinking, I don’t need this, I’m outta here. But just as I was about to gather my stuff and get up, an internal voice out of nowhere shot through my brain and speared right through all these doubting and lousy feelings, and told myself to sit my ass back down and complete the rest of this very short commitment.
Once again, the instructor started hollering out the commands, “Who’s up, let’s go guys, you’re too slow, you need to get in the habit of doing things quickly but not rushed, and to do that you have to practice. Let’s go, c’mon, who’s up?” Someone else was up and I just concentrated on my note card and went through the steps as I had memorized them. Even though I knew I was going to stumble, I felt I had some of the parts down, in the order they were supposed to be executed.
And then I’m called, “Ryan, c’mon, dress/redress, let’s go.” I successfully and correctly did the indirect care, and made my way over to the sink to wash my hands. At home, I taped a card to the bathroom mirror with all the handwashing steps and for three days leading up to this Saturday, literally talked the steps through while I was washing my hands for the full required three minutes each and every single time. The waste of water bothered me but I had to practice. I decided to do the same “talk through each step” process as I washed my hands there in the skills room.
I was quick to get my supplies, and quick to start the process, doing each step mostly correctly, and the instructor was helping with her comments mostly and let me get through about halfway when she stopped me. I had done one part completely wrong, but that didn’t matter, she was impressed that I had clearly practiced and was talking through each step of the skill which no one had been doing. She used me as an example and said, “See, when you read, you study, you practice, you can do it – good effort, Ryan.” I decided to inject a bit of humor and said, “Thanks, I just didn’t want to get yelled at!” Everyone broke up at that, and even the instructor cracked a half smile. We all watched her finish up my skill and sat back down. My classmate to the left turned to me and asked if I was already in the medical field. I laughed and said no, but that I had practiced a bit during the week.
Like a kid, I was riding high from my effort being recognized, but that was short-lived. We finished up Saturday number three with the skills of recording pulse and respirations. For these two skills, we used each other to take a pulse and observe respirations. The fact that we were using each other (obviously Ms. Suzie wouldn’t work), and that we both were sitting in a chair opposite one another, as opposed to addressing an unresponsive plastic mannequin lying in bed, totally threw me so I messed up by not even doing indirect care the first time when it was my turn. I screwed up a second time, but the instructor let me go on, and then I couldn’t find the person’s pulse, and the instructor told me to just sit down and relax.
I was the final student that day to demonstrate those skills once more, and despite the anxiety, I overcame it and ended up recording the exact data that the instructor recorded as she was observing. Sometimes what feels like insane internal pressure works for me rather than against me, but not often.
The afternoon ended with her telling us that in fact, the school said she was not allowed to adjust the time of the class, which meant that we would instead meet in two weeks for the last class. Thank goodness, a break!
The phone rings and I hesitate as caller ID flashes into view. I don’t have to press ‘answer’. I already know the question.
My eyes wander back to the screen where the half-written email waits patiently for the return of my attention. Reaching for the phone now. “This isn’t a convenient time,” I thought. “Say, no. You have to say no.”
There’s a laundry hamper brimming with activewear – after all, we are busy people. And our fridge is stocked well for a feast, as long as it’s made completely of condiments. I desperately need to go shopping. The dentist appointment tomorrow and the hair appointment the day after that.
The phone has now rung twice.
Oh shoot! I promised to babysit all day Thursday. And when will I find time to write get-well cards? My thoughts are like springs, bouncing from cell to cell, gathering reason.
The phone has now rung three times.
The freelance editing job I promised to complete lays on my desk, thesaurus and grammar guide wide open, purple ink pen at the ready. This job I prayed for, and now time escapes as though the Earth has cracked and minutes are slipping through.
The request just inside the ringing phone is not convenient. But I answer.
The voice on the other side is weak and tearful. “I’m having a hard day,” she says. “Would you be able to take me to lunch soon?” I think, but then do not say, what I’m thinking. I already know the right answer.
“Could I take you to lunch tomorrow? I can pick you up right after my dentist appointment.”
Doing the next right thing colors outside the lines of convenience.
Retirement has turned the virtues of a non-scheduled life into a teeter-totter of chaotic commitments. The things that are convenient rarely align with those of highest value.
Instead of clambering to meet a deadline, I took my friend to lunch, and afterward we took a long, quiet drive over miles of country roads, revisiting the area where she once lived, married, and raised her children for over 90 years.
Love isn’t a matter of convenience, it’s a matter of compassion.
The Lord is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger, and rich in love. – Psalm 145:8
Lve is a mysterious journey
as paradoxical as life itself
straight as an arrow sometimes
yet as uncertain as wandering
through virgin woods
with no clearly worn path
no guiding star…no map…no compass
Lve is a tender journey
from heart to heart
and back again
in a never ending circle
of true caring and
unwavering commitment
Lve is a journey unbounded by
conventions like space or time
or even life itself
with a reach that can be
both infinite and immediate
both forever and now
Lve is a magnificent journey
at times fleeting and foolish
unpredictable as weather or wind
other times as stolid and sure
as a mountain range
as certain as the sun rising
day after day
in all its splendor
Lve is an ongoing journey
like a flowing river shifting
and adapting
shaping itself
to whatever is there
just beyond the bend
Lve is a never-ending journey
available to all who are willing
to feel their way
moment by moment
through the tumultuous
complexity of emotions
that rise and fall
breath by breath
from the heart, mind, and pen of Minx
Episode SummaryBe inspired by the potential of this book, Ascending at the Speed of Surrender by Zen Benefiel; a timely piece for peace and harmony among people and planet.
Episode NotesHello to you listening in Hickory, North Carolina! Coming to you from Whidbey Island, Washington this is Stories From Women Who Walk with 60 Seconds for Motivate Your Monday and your host, Diane Wyzga.
My very grounded astral friend and colleague, Zen Benefiel, has published a book entitled Ascending at the Speed of Surrender. As he wrote to me: “I’m going into realms most don’t travel with this one.”
What could he mean? Zen is a world-bridger. His work embraces the process of a planetary civilization in evolution and the “other-worldly” help it receives along the way. If you are someone who looks deeply into the conundrum of the human condition and finds answers beyond your scope of understanding Zen can help. How? Research, a lifetime of personal interactions with non-human intelligence, and the willing suspension of belief systems about so-called inner and outer realities to investigate our collective quest for a better world.
Instead of holding back out of fear of rejection, Zen chose to Be the Dream, the dream that he has been living, to share what he has learned. I hope you’ll be inspired by the potential of his book, a timely piece for peace and harmony among people and planet.
Click HERE in the Episode Notes to access Zen’s book on Amazon.
As well as read his bio and how to get in touch with Zen.
BIO
Orphaned at birth and six weeks later adopted on the anniversary of his adoptive parents, Bob and Lou Benefiel, Bruce was curious and explored questions few could understand, let alone answer.
Zen has four children, 9 grandchildren and 6 great-grandchildren that inspire his efforts to make a better world. He currently lives in Arizona with his wife Luba, an extraordinary classical pianist and music/piano teacher from St. Petersburg, Russia. Zen has played golf and drums, his two favorite pastimes, since his youth. His favorite music to play is improvisation with a progressive jazz/latin/rock mixture.
The moniker of ‘Zen’ came from one the crew of a TV show he produced and hosted called One World. The concept interview is on this author’s page in the video area. Zen was a guest on Dr. Jeffrey Mishlove’s New Thinking Allowed which came about in a serendipitous sequence in 2018, fulfilling a 28-year dream come true scenario. Hosting One World, Zen’s host/interview favorites to emulate were Dr. Mishlove and Bill Moyers, with hopes of someday being worthy of an interview with one of them.
Luba’s first Christmas present in 2017, an Ancestry.com subscription, brought another gift in January 2019, Zen was reunited with his birth mother. A synchronistic event through a friend with skip-tracing software also led to realizing he’d met is birth father in Phoenix in the late 80s, unbeknownst to either, at a UFO conference. Now that is some spooky cool action up close and personal.
Giving his wife credit for beginning again, he hosts a new version One World in a New World , coming off a 30-year hiatus, engaging apocalyptic chats with professionals and thought leaders. It’s unique in peering into the bridging of inner and outer worlds
Get in Touch With Zen:
Website: https://ZenBenefiel.com
YouTube: https://youtube.com/@OneWorldinaNewWorld
You’re invited*: “Come for the stories – stay for the magic!” Speaking of magic, I hope you’ll subscribe, follow, share a 5-star rating and nice review on your social media or podcast channel of choice, and join us next time*! Remember to stop by the website, check out the Services, arrange a Discovery Call, and Opt-In to stay current with Diane and Quarter Moon Story Arts and on LinkedIn.
Stories From Women Who Walk Production Team
Podcaster: Diane F Wyzga & Quarter Moon Story Arts
Music: Mer’s Waltz from Crossing the Waters by Steve Schuch & Night Heron Music
All content and image © 2019 to Present: for credit & attribution Quarter Moon Story Arts
The Crow flew over the fields and forest toward the river wanting to see his friend. The first time he saw the deer it was just a small fawn and was all alone near a creek. He was afraid, extremely hungry, and wandering the forest looking for his mother. He had seen his mother cross the highway telling him to wait for her to come back. Sadly, she never came back, and it was up to the Owl and the Crow to raise the fawn.
The Crow flew high over the forest, wetlands, and fields looking for a place for the fawn to live and be safe. The forest provided nuts, shrubs, and security. The ponds and lakes had water and the fields had many grasses. Each day the fawn got bigger, and the Crow flew over to the pond where he would always bring the deer treats from bird feeders. Then one day the Crow told the Owl that they needed a name for the deer. The Owl being wise and the Crow cunning, they decided to name him Benny, the name of the old farmer where the Crow and Owl met every morning.
It was the night that Benny feared the most, the sounds, the predators, and most of all, the loneliness. The Owl watched over him during the long winter nights. A silent friend yet one that would always be nearby. Benny always looked forward to hearing the birdsongs knowing that soon the morning would light up the sky with pastel colors and the new day awakening the forest.
The Crow was flying over the forest and near a field, he saw deer drinking from a pond and he flew back to Benny telling him to follow him and hopefully find some new friends and become part of the herd. He wandered slowly over to the herd eating the grass from the field. He gradually came closer to the deer and finally, a doe came close enough that they touched nose to nose.
Benny had finally found a family and was able to be a part of the herd. The Owl and the Crow were always near but they knew they had done the right thing. They would talk often about Benny at their early morning fence post.
Read part one:
The Owl And The Crow | BIZCATALYST 360°
I have written about Nature because I love the natural world.Springtime is a new beginning. Special because the world of trees, bushes, and flowers prepare for their rebirth. The mornings earlier, sunset later. Early Spring I find fascinating and not just because of daffodils, crocuses, and snowdrops, caressing the heart through their early appearance.
Winter is so grey, void of color. Early blossom revitalises the senses, and heart, visiting hope, and a smile.
Trees and bushes. Tiny little green buds are awaiting release.
Hydrangeas: many bright green buds appear cautiously, aware that freezing weather confines their mission with glorious lilac.
Trees; majesties of the world. Doubtless ‘communicating’ with their roots as they prepare to release their gifts of green.
Weeping willows beside a river display the tiniest leaf buds, prior to illuminating a previously dull riverside, their reflections offering hope as they prepare for Real Spring.
The winter months reveal distant landscapes and hills. Springtime, early
Summer and beyond, close a curtain thus focusing on closer majesty. Spring is approaching.
A latecomer is the Indian bean tree; with large leaves awaiting other trees to display their foliage.
Avenues of trees reach out their topmost branches in friendship once more.
When the sky is blue, dramatic reflections create an imaginary upside-down world or in fact two worlds.
Looking closely at new buds offers a sense of light and optimism.
Birdsong; always present, becomes a celebration; a chorus of birds once again enjoy a supreme happiness that Spring provides.
Once again Nature’s rebirth is upon us.
Miss not tiniest bright green buds, growing every day as they compliment the chorus of myriad birdsong.
Spring, with its refreshing scent, lasts not.
Make the most of this most revealing season. Walk around and seek Nature’s Springtime magic. Refreshed the heart.
Latin for “Always the Truth” seems to old Gumshoe that that phrase is a pretty good creed for leaders (as well as for ourselves) to practice folks. Of course, it may depend on the time, place, and circumstance.
The much-quoted Sir Winston Churchill made (during the preplanning of “Operation Overlord” for the June 6th, 1944 cross-channel D-Day invasion of Nazi-held Normandy) the following comment:
In wartime, the truth is so precious that she should always be attended by a bodyguard of lies.
It seems that wise Winston meant that the truth had to be concealed by subterfuge, false-flag ops as well as downright deceptive-skullduggery methods to keep the Nazis guessing and standing on their goose-stepping tippy-toes. “Achtung mein Fuhrer!”
It was for the good under these wartime circumstances when free world survival was not guaranteed. This makes pretty good sense to Gumshoe since D-Day was successful and it was (thank God) NOT compromised. Allies won, Alleluia!
If the truth about the invasion had been compromised, Gumshoe is pretty darn sure that we all would now be speaking German as well as we would be shouting “Sieg Heil!” during our endless (mindless) lock-step marching in torchlight parades. The truth was effectively concealed by a number of methods that would be considered a bodyguard of lies and misdirections for Adolf.
Thankfully, Gumshoe never would have ever acquired a taste for wiener schnitzel or even sauerkraut; although Gumshoe loves those giant warm salty pretzels. “Gut und lecker!”
Now Gumshoe supposes that you fine folks may ask why this history lesson? It’s simply that we MUST be able to trust our leaders to keep bonafide secrets “SECRET” that are vital and necessary for our national security and good. Sadly, Gumshoe knows that our current leaders have already been compromised by our professed enemies and they have compromised themselves for their own selfish pursuits of wealth and power or idiot fantasies. They definitely have lost Gumshoe’s trust. Their combined body of lies is an attempt to conceal the truth from us about their total moral bankruptcy and their toxic corruption. Their interests hold sway over our national welfare and possibly our future national survival.
Think about the lies concerning lockdowns, the origin of Covid-19, masks, social distancing, school and business closures, mandatory vaccines (an oxymoron for gene testing), open borders, self-reliant fossil fuel energy is bad, horrendous fentanyl deaths, China is our friend . . .truth be damned!
In cop work, Gumshoe would warn all of his assigned police trainees:
I can and will teach you how to be a good cop and how to survive on the streets. However, I cannot teach you personal integrity; you either have it or you don’t! Once you lose it, you are finished being a cop.
Some of these trainees did not take heed and were dismissed before they could do harm. Good riddance to them for the greater good and for citizens’ welfare.
Too bad Gumshoe could not have had some field training time with some of our leaders so that they would have heard that admonishment. We all would have been better off without the ones lacking integrity. The truth would have been preserved by the honorable and selfless leaders whom we would trust.
Winston would also have been proud as he would have undoubtedly displayed his signature two-finger victory sign.
That’s all for now from Gumshoe kind folks. Remember to always love the ones who love you and try to love the ones who don’t.
Coram Deo!
PS: President Ronald Reagan once said: “If we ever forget that we are ONE nation under God, then we will be a nation GONE UNDER”.
It’s not too late to pray for our nation and for good leaders. Hope springs eternal for that city on a hill don’t cha know.
Lily Zhu, Washington State University
Do you think that creativity is an innate gift? Think again.Many people believe that creative thinking is difficult – that the ability to come up with ideas in novel and interesting ways graces only some talented individuals and not most others.
The media often portrays creatives as those with quirky personalities and unique talent. Researchers have also identified numerous personality traits that are associated with creativity, such as openness to new experiences, ideas and perspectives. Together, they seem to paint a dire picture for those who consider themselves conventional thinkers, as well as those who do not work in creative occupations – including roles that are often considered traditional and noncreative, such as accountants and data analysts.
These beliefs miss a key part of how creativity works in your brain: Creative thinking is actually something you engage in every day, whether you realize it or not. Moreover, creativity is a skill that can be strengthened. This matters even for people who don’t consider themselves creative or who aren’t in creative fields.
In research that I recently published with organization and management scholars Chris Bauman and Maia Young, we found that simply reinterpreting a frustrating situation can enhance the creativity of conventional thinkers.
Using creative thinking to cope with emotionsCreativity is often defined as the generation of ideas or insights that are novel and useful. That is, creative thoughts are original and unexpected, but also feasible and useful.
Everyday examples of creativity are plentiful: combining leftover food to make a tasty new dish, coming up with a new way to accomplish chores, mixing old outfits to create a new look.
Another way you do this is when you practice what’s called “emotional reappraisal” – viewing a situation through another lens to change your feelings. There is an element of creativity to this: You’re breaking away from your existing perspectives and assumptions and coming up with a new way of thinking.
Say you’re frustrated about a parking ticket. To alleviate the bad feelings, you can think of the fine as a learning moment.
If you’re anxious about a presentation for work, you can cope with the anxiety by framing it as an opportunity to share ideas, rather than as a high-stakes performance that could result in demotion if handled poorly.
And if you’re angry that someone seemed unnecessarily combative in a conversation, you might reevaluate the situation, coming to view the behavior as unintentional rather than malicious.
Training your creative musclesTo test the link between creative thinking and emotional reappraisal, we surveyed 279 people. Those who ranked higher on creativity tended to reappraise emotional events more often in their daily life.
Inspired by the link between emotional reappraisal and creative thinking, we wanted to see whether we could use this insight to develop ways to help people be more creative. In other words, could emotional reappraisal be practiced by people in order to train their creative muscles?
We ran two experiments in which two new samples of participants – 512 in total – encountered scenarios designed to provoke an emotional response. We tasked them with using one of three approaches to manage their emotions. We told some participants to suppress their emotional response, others to think about something else to distract themselves and the last group to reappraise the situation by looking at it through a different lens. Some participants were also given no instructions on how to manage their feelings.
In a seemingly unrelated task that followed, we asked the participants to come up with creative ideas to solve a problem at work.
In the experiments, conventional thinkers who tried reappraisal came up with ideas that were more creative than other conventional thinkers who used suppression, distraction or received no instructions at all.
Cultivating flexible thinkingNegative emotions are inevitable in work and life. Yet people often hide their negative feelings from others, or use distraction to avoid thinking about their frustrations.
Our findings have implications for how managers can think about how to best leverage the skills of their workers. Managers commonly slot job candidates into creative and noncreative jobs based on cues that signal creative potential. Not only are these cues shaky predictors of performance, but this hiring practice may also limit managers’ access to employees whose knowledge and experience can play major roles in generating creative outcomes.
The result is that the creative potential of a significant part of the workforce may be underutilized. Our findings suggest that supervisors can develop training and interventions to cultivate creativity in their employees – even for those who might not seem predisposed to creativity.
Our research also indicates that people can practice flexible thinking every day when they experience negative emotions. Although people may not always have control over the external circumstances, they do have the liberty to choose how to cope with emotional situations – and they can do so in ways that facilitate their productivity and well-being.
Lily Zhu, Assistant Professor of Management, Information Systems and Entrepreneurship, Washington State University
This article is republished from The Conversation under a Creative Commons license. Read the original article.
It is a rare person who never offers an excuse, and most of the reasoning blames the lack of time available. But there are always at least two sides to a problem, making it worthy of reviewing what we dismiss and why and whether regret was to follow. It is possible that on occasions, more than we care to admit, the answer is Yes! to the question, ‘Are excuses holding you back?’
The typical answer is, ‘I would like to, but sadly, I don’t have the time.’ The question is, what can we do to improve our response?
My StoryTwo recent experiences raise the question, are excuses holding you back? My answer is more so in the early days, but experience and time management, working together, improve my willingness to do more. As time progresses, my responses have a wide meter read, from, quietly believing, ‘this is ridiculous’ to graciously accepting an opportunity.
Losing OpportunitiesWe can improve further when we admit that we dismissed an idea assuming it will never work or is ridiculous. For years, it baffled me why recruiters would ask seemingly ‘ridiculous questions.’ Long ago, I turned down a potential job, thinking, ‘I don’t have time for this nonsense.’ Today, I realized I too quickly moved away from a job interview as the article revealed the answer to why the strange questions.
But a few years later, I thought I’d have fun when asked what animal I would like to be and why. My answer was that I would like to be a giraffe on sales calls! To my complete surprise, the offer came almost immediately. Demonstrating the value, I then turned that answer into an article appearing in US News Magazine, ‘What to Say If an interviewer asks which animal you would be and why:’
Finally, today, the long-awaited answer came to me via an article that reveals why recruiters ask these mind-boggling or annoying questions. The author refers to the questioning style as ‘situational.’ She then states that the answers applicants provide tell a great deal about their thinking and behaviors to determine whether they will be a good fit for the employer.
The Gift of An Athletic CapUpon receiving an athletic cap, a big smile came over me upon seeing the slogan, ‘365.’ As an avid goal-setter always striving to improve, it brought about the thought of 365 days per year and what it means to me. Suddenly, the realization that a lack of time is not necessarily the reason for an excuse but our preference to dismiss.
‘I don’t have the time’ is a weak excuse, most often.
Let’s do some calculations:There are 365 days per year, and we have 24 hours each day to do as we see fit. The total number of hours in a year is 8,760, and 525,600 is the number of minutes we have to spend any way we like each year. Surely, we can do more than we allow ourselves with proper goal-setting and an increase in motivation to accomplish more.
As efficiencies take over, I realize specific strategies work well, allowing me to accomplish more in less time. Taking a calculated risk to test the reality of a new idea working well proves better than expected. And the occasion it does not, I realize what needs to improve to advance. Doing so includes ‘finding time’ for requests and offers that, in the past, I would decline.
The overall benefit of utilizing more of our yearly minutes is:* Being able to build a broader collaborative effort * Branding and marketing will become more robust than ever * Offers that we desire unexpectedly come our way
The lyrics to Jim Croce’s song, Time In A Bottle, come to mind:‘But there never seems to be enough time
To do the things you want to do once you find them…’
Your Story: Are Excuses Holding You Back?Truthfulness begins with each of us. It is best to admit to opportunities you may have dismissed, not bothering to learn the facts before deciding. But it is never too late to realize a habit or two is ready for updates. An excellent place to begin is to ask why they are asking and how the person sees the outcome. Ask for the benefits of participating and the downside, should there be one. It will help you come to a better conclusion and final decision.
On occasion, people propose the opposite of what you may believe. There are almost always two sides to every story or opinion. It’s best to stop and consider the perspective on the other side to see if there is room for compromise. And should time be a real issue, consider how you may increase efficiencies for productivity in the future. With 525,600 minutes available to us yearly, there is little doubt that we can save time in the real world to do the things we want to do.
Most of all, by taking better control of habits and accepting possibilities, advancements of all types will occur more frequently. And should a setback unexpectedly appear, taking the time to learn the lessons will help with progress, too. Either way, you can turn the scenario into a win-win for your success!
In Conclusion: Are Excuses Holding You Back?It is best to review past offers and how we reacted to them in our quiet time to discover if a better approach awaits. Should you desire to minimize excuses holding you back, seek out commonalities of the missed opportunities to improve upon moving forward.
I remember well one of the places I grew up in. It was the town of Stettler. My father was a bowling proprietor so no doubt, I grew up around the sound of bowling balls being lofted on the lanes and teams cheering each other on. At the other end of the building, it was billiard balls being racked and clacked by the youth who were on lunch break from school. It carried on through the evening.
I used to have to take my Dad’s supper up to him at times, but he was never far away; a few blocks at most. I always knew where to find him though he was seldom home. Then there were the summertime memories of the Lake season. This started in May and took us into September long weekend yearly. We had a family-run General Store for many years which consumed our summers. It was a whole lotta fun as well as it was the hangout place. Nothing fancy just a few booths and jute boxes and my parents let kids write on the walls. I still remember one of the sayings clearly: “Never smoke in bed… the sleeping bag you burn may be your wife.” Hmmm! Not nice but in the sixties to 80’s smokers were seen. Another sign too said something like…”We’d like to help you out…which way did you come in?” There were many and it all added to the graffiti section. I also well remember my friends and how we free spirits all flocked together each summer.
I also remember the birds on a wire outside my window that awoke me every morning. I remember the hills and the dirt roads and the black nights with not hardly a light to be seen. I remember my portable radio that brought music to my ears and the lake dances where we whooped it up on weekends.
If you didn’t like to dance there were ball tournaments and other things too for the younger generation. All this, thanks to my father who was a lifetime promoter of people and used to sing: “The More We Get Together…the happier we’ll be.”
There was the Simpson’s Boat Rental not far away in the crescent of the Bay area. We all knew each other well. I was also on very good terms with them and many others until the night of the “Peanut Butter Plaster” Not many were happy when we took to this. Toilet seats, outhouses, car handles, etc. Hardly a family unaffected. I’m still not sure why a young girl’s birthday party and sleepover got so out of hand and I’m not sure I got another one after. Call it temptation, mischief, or truthfully one of the worst things I was part of at that age. My mother grounded me for the remainder of the summer but my Dad who always lightened things up when he knew I was truly sorry, bought me an oversized jar of PB with a handle for my birthday that year.
I always tell others that: “It’s o.k. to be a live wire, as long as you are well grounded.” And I was! I was always surprised by how forgiving the lake people were. I think it’s only because of the love they held for my parent’ who established a name and besides, the apple didn’t fall far from the tree as the expression goes.
Backing up a bit I must say that early childhoods were memorable for the youngsters at Buffalo Lake. Who needed toys when all it took was a piece of cardboard and a short walk and you were at snake hill ready to toboggan down? In the afternoon a deck of cards and a few snacks and you were set for the card party. There was no such thing as fear and few bullies ever surfaced. My parent’s kept them in check if they did.
What memories live in your mind? Would you care to share?
At this time of year, many people get clear on what their word of the year is or spend time reflecting on the previous year and setting a vision for the next year. Interestingly I had lunch recently with a colleague who sets up her year in August of the previous year. That said this is not an article about the merits of having a vision or when to set it, in fact, it goes deeper than that to question the very essence of what vision is.
In a course in miracles a book that was channelled by a woman whose name was only revealed on her death, one of the key ideas is that In no situation that arises do you realise the outcome that would make you happy. Therefore, you have no guide to appropriate action and no way of judging the result.
This idea can bring up a lot of resistance for many because as one of my clients calls it your Shego/hego wants to be in control of everything that happens so it will fight tooth and nail to retain that. To help clients understand these ideas I encourage them to work with the following mantra I do not perceive my own best interests for at least a day.
Why does that mantra work?I found that particular mantra very freeing, perhaps because from where I am at and what I have experienced, it made so much sense. Think of it this way the conditioned self has been taught that it is each person for themselves and that you have to go into every situation considering either what’s in it for me or how I can I get the best outcome for me?
If you strip that attitude back to the underlying emotion that’s driving that way of being, it is fear. And what can make this more complex is that sometimes this fear is masked by anger. Let’s explore fear for a moment. It could be fear of missing out; fear of being ripped off and so on. When we examine that fear we see what lies beneath. It may be that you feel completely alone and feel the need to protect yourself for example. Now let’s dig deeper to see what lies underneath that. Fundamentally what we see is lack: this can show up as I haven’t got enough: or that I am not enough. If we are all aspects of the Divine then how can that idea be true?
At its simplest when in that place we are not seeing clearly; and all destructive emotions are merely mental projections based on interpretations that come from deeply held and unquestioned beliefs. How do we shift this? I am an adherent of these words from a very wise soul:
In the end, the reason we study is to be able to tackle and reduce our destructive emotions.
~ dalai lama
This year more than ever as a seven-year, you are encouraged to become more reflective and put space in your diary to create that. What has helped me is to cultivate a daily practice that includes:
- 10-20 mins of qi gong to clear any trapped chi (energy);
- reflection on my emotional and mental state using prompts;
- reading spiritual books and reflecting on their message and what it means for me
Notice the importance of working with the physical, mental, emotional and spiritual. Which of these pathways comes most easily for you?
The power of thoughtIt is your thoughts that affect your sense of emotional well-being and can impact on your effectiveness in life. Remember there are no neutral thoughts.
Every thought you have can bring you pain or delight. And the more we are stuck in that level of reality the more challenging life can become because it can feel overwhelming.
Every day the Dalai Lama follows a daily practice that consists of cultivating bodhicitta, a sense of altruism rooted in compassion. You could work with the following verse to cultivate yours if it resonates:
For as long as space endures
And for as long as living beings remain
Until then may I too abide
To dispel the misery of the world.
Why make time for a daily practice when life is so busy?
There was more reading, although, after day 1, I was never called again. I chalked it up to there being very real cultural differences between myself and the rest of the class including the instructor. Perhaps even with the word mispronouncing, she felt the class probably had just as difficult a time understanding me as I did them.
ENJOY PART 1 BELOW ︎
Certifiable (Part 1)
It was in this second class that the second male was late to class. The instructor revisited the fact that she was trying to get the school to adjust the class time of the very last class an hour and a half earlier so that she could make her flight back to Nassau where her father was being buried.
Ten minutes in, and the guy was still late. The grandmother-type in front of me broke the awkward silence and asked the teacher how she’s doing/feeling about her father’s passing. It was like a relief valve suddenly was activated. The instructor launched into a story that flipped our collective heads on end.
She began by saying a few weeks prior, she had been chatting with her father on her way to work, and he admitted to not feeling that well. She said she told him she’d call to check on him after she got off work, which would be around 9 pm. She said she got off work and proceeded to call the care center only to find the calls go unanswered. Apparently, this phone number she called was supposed to be manned 24 hours, so given her calls went unanswered, she decided to make the twenty-minute drive to the care center where her father resided.
Because it was past visiting hours, the main entrance was closed. She went to the back door and waited approximately 10 minutes until someone came out. Someone eventually came out and she asked about her father, to either see him, or if not possible, to get an update.
The nurse said she’d go see and return with an update. 10 min passed, 20 min passed, 30 min passed… after 45 min, the nurse came back to the door with the update. The nurse said her father was conscious but unresponsive and that an ambulance was being called to take him to the hospital.
Our instructor said she and her cousin, who drove to the care center to offer support, were completely blindsided by that information since they had not been contacted to inform them there was a change in his condition.
It gets worse.
After the ambulance arrived and the EMTs went in, our instructor and her cousin waited another 30 minutes until they brought her father down. When they did, an EMT took our instructor aside and said, when they were transferring him, his urine bag had blood in it, and appeared that it hadn’t been changed or cleaned in some time.
Her father passed away in the hospital two days later. He was already battling cancer and was likely going to die within months perhaps, but the complete breakdown of care absolutely sped up the timeline.
And it is because of all this that I think our instructor was mostly emotionless and maybe a little impatient and a bit harsh during this five-week period. Not only because of the emotionality of what had occurred and what she and her family were dealing with, but also, and I think this is why she shared the story, to emphasize how critical the care we were learning to provide actually is in the real world.
The late classmate finally arrived and the reading of chapters continued, with each of the other four students reading 2-3 chapters. All but me. I figured she didn’t call on me to read again because she saw how emotionally I’d reacted to her story, with full-on crocodile tears running down my face as she was sharing this incredibly personal and terrible event in her life. Probably a good call on her part.
We finished in the classroom and walked back to the skills demonstration room. There was a row of plastic chairs against the wall, and we all took a seat in every other chair. In front of us were two hospital beds with two plastic cabinets separating them.
In the bed on the right was Ms. Suzie, the full-scale plastic female patient body we were to manipulate this way and that, to demonstrate the skills. There was a bed table at the foot of Ms. Suzie’s bed. The instructor stood on the side of the other bed, behind a bed table that was raised to waist level.
We were getting settled in and my classmate to the right turns to me and shocks me to my core by asking if I’m ready for my skill. “What skill?”, I ask. She answered, “the one the instructor gave you last week.” I said, “What are you talking about, she didn’t give me any specific skill.”
“Yes,” my classmate said, “she did. Don’t you remember, she made us write down what we’d be doing each week?” With that, I ran back to the classroom, picked up my green notebook, tore into it, found where I’d taken notes, and almost peed my scrubs. I was supposed to demonstrate how to change Ms. Suzie’s bedpan. Panic does not even describe what sets in, as I wasn’t even remotely prepared to demonstrate this skill.
The instructor started almost shouting, “C’mon guys, who’s up, who’s doing what skill? C’mon, you’re wasting time, let’s go, let’s go.”
Thankfully, someone else was called to demonstrate their skill and while that student started and failed multiple times and the instructor took over to show the correct way to execute the skill, I used the time to furiously take notes on how to change Ms. Suzie’s bedpan.
“Bedpan, bedpan, c’mon, Ryan, bedpan, let’s go.” I nervously got up, stumbled my way through indirect care, and left to go to the end of the room where a sink was to wash my hands. I failed horribly at washing my hands, fumbled my notecard, gathered supplies, put some of them on the bed table, then went to the plastic cabinets between the beds and pulled out the toilet tissue, the wet wipes, and the bedpan. I also placed those items on the bed table and suddenly heard, “STOP, YOU FAIL!” “Where does it say in the book to put the bedpan directly on the bed table?? Where, you show me?” the instructor shouted at me. “Why didn’t you put down the plastic barrier over the table first?” she asked. “Automatic fail, sit down,” she said, completing her tirade.
I awkwardly went back to my chair, and she demonstrated the skill the correct way. This pattern was essentially repeated for the other skills being demonstrated by the other students.
But again, cultural differences were on full display in the skills room. I’m not sure, but maybe in Jamaican culture, it’s perfectly acceptable to ask a woman who is clearly not pregnant if she is in fact pregnant, which our instructor absolutely did of one of the students. And going further by asking that same woman if she wasn’t pregnant, why she didn’t have a flat stomach. This young woman was in perfectly fine shape and wouldn’t be mistaken for pregnant by any stretch of the definition. This all came out of nowhere.
Another female student, she of a larger size, then spoke up. She tried defending the woman who the instructor asked was pregnant by saying that wasn’t nice to ask. The instructor responded by laying into her, asking why she herself was the size she was. This was the student to my right who clued me into the fact that we were responsible to demonstrate a skill that day, and she was a sweet and gentle soul. I think she tried to elicit compassion from the instructor when she responded by saying she had had two kids by C-section and it had been a long recovery. The instructor shot back, “I’ve had two kids too, and I also have back problems, but I don’t look like you.” The teacher wasn’t heavy or obese, but she also wasn’t thin by comparison. She appeared like a Mom in her mid-40s with two jobs and all the stress that comes along with that responsibility. I just sat there in my hard plastic chair the entire time trying to hold my jaw from hitting the floor at hearing these zingers going back and forth.
Whenever we’d stand around Ms. Suzie’s bed, to watch the instructor demonstrate the various skills correctly, I found myself looking around the room. I hadn’t noticed it before but there was a corkboard above the chairs where we sat. It had paper of various different colors and sizes tacked into it. It was all mostly bland information-type stuff. But there was one flier that caught my attention. It was a reminder which said… “Never grab a patient by the neck, always support the patient with both of your upper limbs to ensure safety, because…” now, one would expect the last part of this sentence to say something like, “the neck is fragile and must be treated with care” OR …”patient safety is key in everything you do.” But oddly, the last part of the sentence was, “you could kill the patient and go to prison for murder.”
Duly noted!
An Emotional Breakdown Is All I Have Left My kids are the only reason I am still functional…
I don’t know how I kept going. You just do. You have to, so you do.
— Elizabeth Wein
For the past year and a half, I embarked on the most rewarding, yet most heart-wrenching, mission of volunteering for my city stray kids — both kitties and doggies — and granting decent living to as many as possible. I had to instantly regulate my feelings over and over again since my crazy days required gigantic amounts of energy, especially in the absence of any backup option.
Last week, multiple dreadful events contributed to reaching my maximal endurance capacity. I thought I was having a bad day until I went back home, and headed to my neighborhood tribe to serve food. That’s when I discovered the unimaginable level of human cruelty, a level that defies anything I could have ever expected… It wasn’t the first incident. I wrote about the previous one here.
The tribe lives in a private area. For some reason, the owner and janitor decided to keep some members in a protected space and leave the other part outside — a trashy piece of land on the main road. Two mommas gave birth a month ago. The first one had four puppies and the second had seven. When I figured out they were starving, I bottle-fed the latter siblings for 10 days. It was exquisitely undescribable.
At the entrance, I noticed the field was different. My gut started aching but I kept walking until I heard the concierge talking to a guy who referred to three terrorized tiny puppies.
Eight puppies out of the eleven were buried ALIVE by the workers…
Two days after the most horrendous crime I’ve witnessed so far took place, I woke up at 1:30 am to the violent sound of a car hitting something. It turned out to be a living being: the alpha of the same tribe.
You need to know this sweet boy used to be extremely aggressive because of his long abuse history. After tons of patience and daily unconditional love, he started to approach me and ask for cuddles. When he sees me from distance, he runs in my direction and begins to playfully turn in circles as his way to show his excitement.
It took 30 minutes between cruelly and remorselessly hitting him and reaching the vet emergency clinic. The monster kept cursing for his car’s damages. I wanted to kill him but he wasn’t my priority. Looking at the vet’s facial expression when helping me take Max inside, I knew something was terribly wrong. She did her very best to save him. It was too late. Seeing my mess, the genuinely compassionate vet refused to take fees. Moreover, she volunteered to take care of the corpse. I still don’t know how I could drive back home.
As if all these events weren’t enough, one of my four indoor babies has been missing since last Thursday. His name is Mustache. He was supposed to be a foster kid along with his brother Zorro. They were extremely sick. We had long weeks of treatment cycles, each time for a different health condition. During the first two weeks, they had to take five different medicines per day. Eventually, I adopted them.
It has been 16 months of shared pure affection and memories. He never missed fighting with his sister to sleep on mom’s arm…
In my former world, I would have easily fallen into a guilt trap. I would have bitten myself so harshly for not being able to protect my kid by letting him go outside. Today, I know a little better. I know that given the circumstances of living in a tiny flat with not much “catification” and how little energy I have left for playtime, I couldn’t have compromised his emotional health and mojo.
Here is my treasured boy:
Last wordsToday, I am soliciting your wisdom. For the very first time in a year and a half, I am struggling to make sense of the last week’s succeeding events. I am having frequent crises of hysterically shouting and crying till complete exhaustion. The only reason keeping me functional is having to care for all the remaining kids. I am thankful for all the precious and priceless moments I have had the privilege to share with all my lost babies. Nonetheless, starting my grieving process seems impossible this time.
- How am I supposed to grieve nine cowardly murdered doggies?
- How am I supposed to grieve a missing kid when I don’t even know what happened to him and everything in my place reminds me of him?
- Even if I move, how am I supposed to heal my heart while my back is full of his scars since my baby loved to jump on his mom’s shoulders?
I would greatly appreciate some piece of advice. I know I can count on my people. With heartfelt gratitude…
And if you can find it in your heart, please visit and donate whatever you can to my cause by clicking below︎
A DECENT LIFE FOR STREET ANIMAL CHILDREN
Understanding the mind-body connection is vitally important in sustaining a healthy life. To have a healthy, vibrant body, we must eat and drink certain foods rich in vitamins and minerals.
But are we consciously aware of what is needed for a healthy mental state? Besides the foods we eat, what else do you do for your mental health?
In this week’s Mindful Moment, be aware of your thoughts. Ask yourself the following questions:
- Are the thoughts I direct toward myself gently, loving, and compassionate? Are they filled with judgment and criticism?
- Are my overall thoughts positive in nature? Or more negative?
- Do I incorporate thoughts filled with gratitude and appreciation regularly?
When reflecting on the above questions, try to do so with curiosity and no self-judgment.
Our minds are just as important as our bodies. Please treat your mental health with love and respect just as you do for your body. Your mental health deserves your love and attention.
Shaky Science About NothingThere is a fascinating book, The New Science, which is the memoirs of Wilbert Smith. Smith ran Canada’s UFO investigation program, Project Magnet, in the 1950s. The material was discovered and published after his death in 1962. It’s groundbreaking still, with references to conversations with ‘people from elsewhere.’
I’m not an astrophysicist, but the idea of a ‘nothingness’ like Smith speaks of resembles the notion of the Void… from which all things come, or so we believe. This idea of nothingness is surely not understood because we really don’t have the language to describe it, yet if there are repeating patterns, fractals, in creation perhaps this is one that requires a spin around Self.
The entrance and exit within the door to the void within us, inside the tiny point of light of our soul consciousness, may reflect this same notion on a much smaller scale. We’re sorely lacking in our understanding of physics already, developing equations to account for anomalies instead of seeing the universe as anomaly-free and equating it.
We interpret the light from stars with our existing understanding, which may not be so understanding of the myriad of life forms and their location. We think we have ‘something’ and no longer question its validity, yet Smith notes that ‘people from elsewhere’ have a much different understanding of the nature of creation, and ours is in at least slight error.
Given that spin around self, and the assumption that Smith wasn’t fibbing, our questions for discovery may not have developed enough yet to fully comprehend what those structures we think are black holes really are and how they function. Seeing things at a distance makes it almost impossible to fully grok, imho. What is up close now?
Are you aware that you are aware of your awareness at any given moment? Are you able to observe yourself deeply, question your behaviors, beliefs, and bewilderment by them at times? Do you have moments of reflection that seem to evade the notion of time?
There’s been more than one time I’ve been sucked into some kind of ‘tube’ that feels like a conduit of travel. It began with out-of-body experiences as a youth, then progressed to traveling elsewhere, though I never really knew where. There was a sense of movement, though.
I don’t know if it is inner space, outer space, or a combination. The difference is having my eyes closed as I explored, initially believing it to be my imagination. It would seem that, all things functioning as ONE, the combination is probably true. Experiencers (those explorers of non-human contact), at some point, seem to corroborate such ‘trips,’ although descriptions are slightly different.
I agree that the form doesn’t have much to do with it, and yet consciousness needs to have some form of manifestation for interaction to take place. I was shown as a teen that our point of light (the anchor of life within us) can give access to infinite intelligence. For some time we’ve been experiencing a variety of mechanisms and styles of contact, not to mention various life forms. As this process continues, perhaps we realize we missed the idea of ‘nothing’ that is the foundation of everything.
Pick Up the Phone, Please!We receive communication in ways we can understand it, for the most part, and it’s usually subjective and unique to the individual; a real spin around Self. I still think there are patterns we’re not seeing yet. Perhaps we weren’t ready to until recently when the spike in awareness or the culmination of the calendars indicating an evolutionary leap is about ready to take place, has us at least looking for something more.
Perhaps there is a primer, an igniter, that unlocks our understanding and increases our ability to manifest appropriately from our nature instead of our intellect and science. The latter will catch up in time. We’ve spent most of our time in destructive testing to figure out the makings of the universe. What about constructive testing, inquiry into the natural state as it is, not what we believe it to be? Many relate that is the first step; to just BE… empty with inquiry.
I’ll use the Urantia Book as a reference that at least offers the notion of considering a plethora of types of beings and responsibilities in universe administration. The book is esoteric, compiled, and presented by an intelligence or collection of intelligences in an effort to share a greater reality. Like everything ‘from elsewhere,’ our tendency is to attempt to fit the data/information into models we’re familiar with.
Neppe and Close, with their Quantum Theory of Everything (Triadic Dimensional-Distinction Vortical Paradigm), say that consciousness, time, and space are tethered across 9 dimensions. Smith says the ‘people from elsewhere’ relate that the tempic, magnetic and electric fields in the Quadrature Concept span 12 dimensions, all in the spin around Self, a point of observation.
It seems consciousness is capable of experiencing all the above and the bridge between body/mind/spirit/soul is just now appearing. Or perhaps it’s been there all along and we’re just now able to conceive of it, explore it and ruminate without the fear of persecution or rejection. It’s obvious we need to evolve toward something better, something greater, for humanity.
What’s it all mean for us in a practical sense? I’m not sure, though I get the sense ‘we/they’ are trying to get us to understand that from ‘nothing’ everything emerged in perfect order; there is an order to nature and the cosmos we haven’t understood as the natural order, which indicates a natural order in human experience and understanding as well.
We approach it from destructive testing, like CERN, where perhaps an approach from another direction is more appropriate; a simple change in perception that includes consciousness in the equation. I think we’re off to a good start, a silver lining in the Great Reset, perhaps a Great Weset instead, with an uprising in our wise-cracking and scoffing at things we don’t understand.
Coming out of an ‘old’ normal and transforming into a ‘new’ normal might include a deeper check-in. The obsession with self-hygiene and sequestration opened the door to exploring self (our persona) and Self (our Being) in perspective. Ponder your future well in your new spin around Self. Ponder the twist on the pronoun craze going on now and consider these… I Am / We Are.
Grace is the voice that calls us to change and then gives us the power to pull it off.
~ Max Lucado
Meet my Guest speaker Elizabeth (Beth) Urabe (CEO: C(osmic) E(nergy) O(rchestrator) of URABE OFFICIAL, Spirit Art Medium, Spiritual Midwife, Abstract Artist Extraordinaire, BIZCATALYST 360° Featured Contributor). With a surname that belongs to a family of divine origin…these Ideations were bound to come through: Planets’ diverse cultures have divine gifts to contribute so we must respect that. Watch the Episode to know more.
You are incorrect if you think you are the same person all the time. If you do not acknowledge that you have at least one other persona, you will not understand how to blend these images.
How many personas do you have? Do you have one for work, one for your family, yet another for friends, and then another for the parents of your kids?
This persona, this mask that you wear can be beneficial or not. If you have a work persona that is different from your home mask, what is it and how does it help you with your peers and your boss, if you have one? Or do you have a separate persona you wear when you are in direct contact with your boss?
This may sound frivolous, however, we all have different personas. And yes, it can be confusing to others if they catch on. It can also be confusing to you, the one who holds the power over these masks.
Who are you and who are you pretending to be?
It must be exhausting to carry all these personas with you day after day. What if you could be only YOU every day?
This act of masking is what many do to feel safe in different situations, mostly social.
We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.
— Kurt Vonnegut
We’ve all seen it, the pretenders. They certainly run rampant on Facebook. You see people wearing these masks and then you speak to them, if you are lucky, and discover they are illusions of themselves. They are not real, they are following others’ paths, allowing us to think or imagine that they’re very, very successful or equally as powerful. The truth then appears at a break in their persona. A word, a gesture, appears and you go ‘Whoa! What was that?’ – not what you expected. And I do say the word expected because people who attempt to force their personas or masks onto you for their benefit, know that this is the persona you expect to see. And they gave exactly that to you.
Bosses and leaders carry many personas. If only they could afford to be more authentic, we would appreciate their skills more so we say. However, in many cases, we EXPECT them to have many masks and personas. It is expected in the society we have created. And when the supposed truth about who they truly come out is, we are shocked, and surprised, and yet, we are part of the game in supporting their personas.
Any of us can be kind, strong, sad, and cranky without a persona. We can be genuine humans and stop wearing personas or masks to enjoy our lives.
The fewer masks we wear, the closer we are to having more peace in our lives.
Wouldn’t you like to live a life of truth and openness?
Along your path toward truth and peace, check this out.
Back in the day, before you could buy your weed at a seedy little store in some strip mall, you had to rely on people like me. I was a weed dealer back then. I would buy my weed, by the pound from a guy who I only knew as English John. When I got it home I divided it up into lids, which were about 3/4 of an ounce.
The weed itself was in two forms. Half of it was buds; the other half was called shake. It was all weed, and it would all do the trick, but the buds created the perception of quality. So when I re-bagged the weed I always made sure to balance the offering between the buds and the shake. That way, everybody was getting a deal that played to their perception.
I don’t deal weed anymore. I kinda miss it, truth be told. Not so much for the money but for the social aspect of it. The visits, the catching up, the gossip. All my customers were in the advertising business like I was, and back then there was always something going on. Being on top of things was important.
Lately, one of my oldest friends has started to recommend podcasts to me. I actually act on friends’ advice because, to me at least, the podcast world is like a bag of weed.
A few buds but mostly shake. A few interesting and enlightened people and a whole lot of others are pushing some agenda that has little to do with helping people understand the whole picture.
I make it a point to try and listen to at least one podcast every few days. Over the course of the past year, that’s what I have concluded. A few are the buds, who are interesting and tend to take an objective view of whatever they’re on about. The rest are the shake, which are the self-serving or agenda-driven.
And what do you know…it’s the good old 80/20 Rule That Governs Just About Everything. 20% buds, 80% shake.
So if you’re one of those people who listen to a wide range of podcasts religiously, you can be pretty sure that 80% of the time, you’re hearing propaganda of one kind or another, and 20% of the time you’re hearing something that either is or comes close to being the objective truth. As always, it’s up to you to separate the buds from the shake.
The Bible and the Quran are two of the most influential texts in world history. Both books contain teachings studied, analyzed, and interpreted for centuries. Though much debate is on which book is more authoritative or reliable, both share some common themes.
As someone who coaches, mentors, and assists clients from all faiths, I love to study and research various life disciplines and religions to be of more outstanding excellence to those who seek my help and humanity. In this article, I aim to discuss these similarities by sharing some of the common teachings I have found in the Bible and The Qur’an.
While there may be differences between Christianity and Islam regarding certain doctrines or beliefs, they still share many core values that both faiths can agree on and use to create harmony between them. These shared values can provide a basis for respect among different religious groups around the world.
What Are Some Common Teachings?There are many common teachings found within both The Bible and The Qur’an that provide evidence of their shared roots:
- One God: Both books state that only one true God created all things (Quran 59:22-24; Deuteronomy 6:4). This belief unites Christians and Muslims alike in their conviction that all creation belongs to God alone.
- Creation Story: According to Genesis 1-2 and Surah 7 Al-Araf of the Quran, humanity was created from clay by God Almighty (Genesis 2:7; Quran 15:26). This story highlights our connection with each other as human beings since we were all made from similar materials at Creation’s beginning.
- Love Of Neighbor & Compassion For All Creatures: One of Jesus’ primary commands was to “love your neighbor as yourself” (Matthew 22:39), while Muhammad taught compassion towards animals (Hadith 5347). These two laws demonstrate how significant loving others unconditionally is for both religions despite human differences or disagreements.
- Respect For Elders And Parents: Respect for elders is also an essential part of both faith traditions – honor thy father & mother according to Exodus 20:12 & Quran 17 Al-Isra verse 23, respectively – reminding us how important it is to respect our parents no matter what age they may be at any given time!
- Obedience To Authority Figures: Obedience towards authority figures such as rulers/governors/kings etc., has also been commanded by Allah through verses like 4 An Nisa verse 59 where he states, “Obey those who have authority over you” – emphasizing yet again just how crucial following rules set down by higher powers is! Additionally, Jesus said unto his disciples “Render, therefore unto Caesar the things which are Caesar’s;…” signifying His understanding concerning obedience due towards government officials too!
- Avoidance Of Greed And Gluttony: Another common teaching found within both scriptures involves avoidance of greediness/gluttony whereby Proverbs 23 says, “Do not crave another man’s property…do not eat too much honey…or else you will vomit it up” whilst corresponding verses from The Holy Qu’ran warn against excessive indulgence saying “And do not squander your wealth wastefully” [17 Al Israa verse 26] thus illustrating once more how closely aligned these two great faiths are!
In conclusion, I trust, in this article, you will find compelling evidence indicating numerous shared teachings between Christianity & Islam based upon passages found within scripture itself – proving definitively just how connected these two significant religions genuinely are at their core regardless of whatever doctrinal disputes might exist between them externally speaking.
By embracing these points together, a greater understanding of both religions can be achieved amongst believers worldwide, allowing us all to peacefully and mindfully connect and work for the greater good of humanity. To honor God is to step outside of our little minds and do kind and loving deeds that celebrate all of its creation in our authentic ways.
Ultimately, together, no matter the faith you practice, we can empower each other to reclaim our divine birthright to live fulfilling and meaningful lives according to our unique beliefs, talents, callings, and heart desires.
If you are looking for new ways to open floodgates of boundless inspiration, creativity, and unconditional Love, then do grab a copy of A Path to Excellence book, where you will learn an entire 8-step process teaching you practical ways to harmonize two hemispheres of the brain using the Octagon of Excellence method. Helping you use your divine intelligence that resides deep within everyone’s hearts and minds enables living the fullest expression and the most excellent version of yourself every day. In the process, you will learn to harmonize Heart & Mind Intelligence by learning practical advice, tips, and insights to bridge the gap between the analytical left brain’s logical thought processes and the creative, intuitive right hemisphere.
With love and wisdom,
Tony
The beginning of February!? Just when content and safe beneath the grass that was often cut by ‘humans’ (if that’s the correct word).
Very early Spring. Time to see the light that filters through soil and grass. Time to be brave and show modest majesty, which happens rather quickly. Awakening to open space, blue sky above, with fellow crocuses. Exchanging smiles that promote a positive element; a feeling life begins once more
Now it snows. We close our petals enveloping warmth. Strangely, snow mellows sound; a blanket subduing noise of birds and small humans on two wheels shouting (if that’s the right word). Snow melts leaving only patches where trees deny sunlight.
Sunlight! A signal from the Universe that we crocuses understand to be a brightening of human hearts. At least that is the sense as humans stop and witness our conceited glory.
No modesty on our part. We only bloom for a relatively brief period when our dear friends the daffodils replace our myriad colors with bright yellow. They also smile at us and also prompt smiles from humans.
A poet has never blessed us crocuses with words of description, but our relationship with our friends the daffodils, allows us to enjoy an extract from a poem written by Wordsworth.
‘Beside the lake, beneath the trees, fluttering and dancing in the breeze’.
Our crocus family loves this poem, even if it is not about crocuses.
The days illuminate, sensing rapport between ourselves and humans.
Occasionally a piece of metal in their hands (an iPhone?) is lowered towards us and goes ‘click click’. Not in a threatening manner, but with pure pleasure and smiles as human hearts view our colors in a strange form of empathy. Dream-like countenances.
As we crocuses grow in splendor, our faces shine with joy. The fact that Spring sunshine blesses humans with observable appreciation is clear to us.
As weeks pass by we crocuses gain a synergy as we witness a form of gratitude in their eyes. And more humans become closer to clicking away at us. We seem to recognize some humans as they regularly crouch and absorb our beauty. Not modesty but honesty. We crocuses are beautiful.
And so, the Universe signals departure; once again to hide our beauty below grass and soil.
We continue to engage with one another, reaching out as tree roots; maintaining contact, and exchanging experiences of our world and the joy we seem to have provided for those appreciating Nature’s glory.
We seem to give more than we receive, but giving is more precious.
We predate such ‘human’ beings. We are infinity. Our world, the Universe blesses our gift of giving and receiving glances of awe and beauty.
As with my dear family, I am proud to be a crocus. Even though Wordsworth sees us not.
We are here for all and love the joy we bring. We now await rebirth of next Spring.
January was cold and stormy in the Lowcountry and the winds coming off the ocean and marshes were always misty and cold. The full moon would crest across the dunes at Huntington Beach working its way to Brookgreen Gardens where the Veil will open above the ancient oaks. At midnight he would see Rose again, and for a few hours, they would be together.
He parked his car in the grassy area near the entrance gates. The wooded area had many paths and he knew he could walk hidden until he got past the ticket entrance. It was quiet at night, and he heard a white owl hooting in the distance. Feeling the chill, he pulled his coat collar up around his neck knowing the owl would show him where the Veil was open. He felt a strong anticipation knowing Rose was waiting for him under the live oaks.
He walked quickly now as he saw the shimmering of the Veil and the shadow dancers seemingly floating across the sidewalks. As he passed through the Veil, he saw Rose standing near their favorite oak tree. He couldn’t help but notice that she wore all white, even her pearls and hat. They embraced and headed over to where the jazz band was playing and people were dancing. He looked deeply into her eyes telling her how much he loved and missed her.
Rose smiled and held him closer, saying that soon they would be together for all eternity. He knew that he was growing older, and it was getting harder and harder to get to the Veil. He could see the light that danced around her head as she took him by the hand and walked toward the stairway that led to the river. The closer they walked to the river he saw his hands seem to shed the many years and when they looked into the fountain, he could see his hair was no longer grey.
Rose told him that she had watched him from behind the Veil and she was so sad that he never remarried. She was happy when the Veil opened on the Harvest Moon so they could be together for a very few hours from midnight until the first light of morning. It was a magical time those hours, filled with a love so powerful that the Veil would open for them to spend what seemed like moments before Rose had to let him go back across where they would be apart until the Veil opened again.
Tonight, she told him of the tears she shed each time they were together. Rose said there were no tears in Heaven, and it was only here that she could cry. He held her close as the dawn grew nearer. Rose said this night was special and they would walk toward the light together. The light was just beyond the live oaks down the old brick stairs leading to the river.
They walked slowly knowing they would be together for eternity. An Angel waited by the boat that would take them across the river to live in the light, never to part again.
The strength of their love allowed them a love without end.
Amen
Read the complete series from the links below.
Shadow Dancers | BIZCATALYST 360°
The Shadow Dancers | BIZCATALYST 360°
The Shadow Dancers | BIZCATALYST 360°
Devon Michael was a child actor living in poverty when he auditioned for the part of Anakin Skywalker for the Star Wars movie, The Phantom Menace. He saw this opportunity as his way out of poverty and he felt this might well be the most important thing he would ever do. In the aftermath, he learned that he can tell his own story, as he does so rivetingly in this film. “It depends on how you tell your own story, how you tell your story to yourself. Maybe that’s what the Force is, giving yourself permission to see things differently.”
I got triggered the other day. Yep – it happens. And I found myself asking the wrong question. Watch this short video and get a masterful way of getting to the bigger, badder, better, bolder LESSON faster!
To seeking deeper insight instead of shallow answers.
Hugs,
AmyK
I knew that time was precious and fleeting.
I felt it in my soul as my heart was quickly beating.
Who better to turn the hands of time?
It begins with the very first nursery rhyme.
I can tick and talk, then suddenly it’s just too painful to walk.
So I dance and dive and be creative.
I look outside the shadow box and live.
Too many bowling pins are spinning in my head.
Thoughts become elusive once I’ve gone to bed.
Memories of old clash with all that is new.
What I did yesterday; I no longer have a clue.
Take in stride these words I provide.
A promise won’t be kept if you run and hide.
Sure it’s just a melting pot; a miniature mess of all I forgot.
SummaryThere’s a lot of talk about why organizations need to have a purpose beyond a mere marketing tagline: why they do what they do on behalf of those they seek to serve. What’s equally challenging to get at is how an organization defines its why, how they get staff buy-in — or better yet, staff input — and then has the discipline to choose activities that work towards fulfilling it.
I’m never saying that the lack of a real purpose is the only problem that causes organizational dysfunction. But it is one of the most foundational ones because people are looking to contribute with their roles.
— Brooke Erol
My guestMy guest to help walk us through this topic is Brooke Erol. Brooke is a corporate dropout who pursued her dream of having more meaningful work for herself and others where we are not only seeking money but also contributing to a bigger cause. All her life is spent on writing, speaking, coaching, and consulting on this topic of having a life of fulfilling and purposeful work. She works both with individuals- YourBestLife and organizations – Purposeful Business, Inc.
Takeaways√ Many businesses focus on profits over purpose instead of figuring out how to do both.
√ An organization’s pain point is not necessarily an expressed lack of purpose, but lack of purpose is often the driver below the surface.
√ Leaders at the highest point of an organization — founder, and CEO — must have a deep consciousness to understand the imperative of having and living a purpose fully.
√ Companies often face a litmus test as to whether they are going to honor their purpose in their decision-making,
√ Customers and job seekers should monitor a company over time to see if it adheres to its purpose.
√ The number one reason for the purpose to stick is the 100% commitment of the CEO or the founder.
√ Instead of trying to save the whole world, find one area where you can have an impact, and let that be your purpose.
It was my second day preparing a long list of much-required paperwork as part of a tiresome and long process. It’s not that the level of nonsense and unprincipled behavior was surprising.
The adult in me knows why people do what they do. She has been pushed by life to get educated psychologically — most importantly, seriously work on her distorted narratives. Thus, she realizes that when we are merely operating on auto-pilot and are driven by fear, we are in a survival/protective mode.
Whether hurting others is intentional or not, our behavior toward others mirrors our inner turmoil and is not personal when dealing with a stranger. The inner child of my psyche, though, can’t take BS or accept unfairness and/or accountability-avoidance tendencies, and I can wholeheartedly understand and support her! That’s where accessing our self-awareness and enlarging the gap between the stimulus and response — also known as Emotional Regulation — comes into play, hopefully.
If developing one’s EQ is something of interest to you, maybe you might find some value in this essay.
P.S. The left brain plays the adult role of the psyche, while the right one is linked to the inner child archetype.
This is how the discussion with my inner child looks like, in general, when faced with challenging situations and/or dealing with difficult individuals:
Acknowledgment & ValidationI feel you, sweetheart, you know! [Fill in the blanks] is not okay, and you have all the right to feel the way you do.
Pointing out subtly the futility of being attached to the external worldBut here is the thing, love: this situation or behavior is out of our control. We can’t change people’s hearts, sadly enough, baby girl… All we can do is wish them inner peace, lead a virtuous life independently, and enjoy the fruits.
The “Substitute”Do you really wanna lose time and energy we could use for play and creative endeavors on meaningless things that will never add a single value to our sacred world? I bet you don’t! Let’s move on, shall we?
I should probably specify that when the anger emotion is translated to compassion or pity feeling, my action will depend on the circumstances.
When inappropriate behavior is directed at a human being who feels powerless, I will undoubtedly defend them gently but firmly. A calm demeanor helps embarrass the perpetrator and soothe the victim. Sometimes, I feel that the bullies give themselves permission to abuse others because nobody ever stopped them. That’s when I decide to stand up for myself so that the grandiose and delusional individual may think twice before repeating the same behavior with other people in the future. Granting compassion or pity depends on whether my intuition is telling me if the person in front of me is an inherently good folk or an antagonist. In both situations, I can send my unconditional love to the lost parts of the soul, though!
The precious encounterI was on my way back to my faraway car. My heart was peaceful but my vessel was exhausted; first from physical actions and running in all directions, and second from all the Emotional Regulation instances. That’s when I saw that man at the corner of a street filled with cars and people during a peak hour. He had two crutches to help him stand.
I stopped and greeted him warmly before adding, “Do you need any help?”
He smiled beautifully, “I’m looking for a cab.”
I spent around 10 minutes looking for one. I felt heartbroken since I wasn’t aware of how difficult it was to find cabs in my city, and sent some healing love to all those dealing with such a struggle daily… When I eventually caught my cab, I was around a mile far from my friend of the day. I explained I needed him to pick a guy and showed him his spot. The taxi driver firmly notified me that, if I wanted him to do me a favor [yeah… it speaks volumes about entitlement and lack of empathy, you guessed right!], I needed to get into the car so that he doesn’t stop for another customer and may start charging right away… He said that; your eyes are not playing games, nope!
When we reached my friend, I handed the important papers folder to a lady standing next to him and didn’t think twice before helping him sit by gently manipulating his motionless legs. His whole face shone brightly, “I genuinely don’t know what to say to thank you for your generous heart and kindness!”
You don’t need to, my friend! My heart is fulfilled whenever I can contribute to making someone’s day a little better! In fact, I should be the one thanking you… Now, my day’s nonsense repetitive events suddenly make perfect sense… I needed to be in this very place at this very moment to serve you! How wonderful is that?
GratitudeAs usual, I want to thank all of you, dear readers, who decided to stop by and give this piece some of your precious time!
We are always telling stories to one another. It’s part of who we are, how we share information, how we communicate. Did you listen to the news today? Someone told you a story. Did you repeat it to someone else? You told a story to that other person.
How was your day? How did work go? What happened? These are all invitations to tell stories.
The collection, assembly, accumulation of your personal stories amount to the story of your life. It is bookended by your birth and your death. In some cases, there is a prelude as in your parents hoping for a boy or a girl. For many of us there will be an epilogue, a sort of postscript after we have departed. Yet, the beginning of your personal narrative for this lifetime occurs in the middle of a much larger story—your family history, the history of humankind over millennia, the life cycle of the solar system, the galaxy, the entire universe. Your story, your personal narrative is part of this much, much larger story. And, it continues (hopefully for many happy years) as this grand never-ending story unfolds.
Joseph Campbell, the noted mythologist and scholar, helped to uncover the many common elements that comprise the many stories we tell one another about ourselves. Across many different cultures and time periods he researched the big stories about good vs. evil, about encountering and overcoming life’s challenges, about pain and suffering, life and death, about creation and the afterlife. These are the big stories that help humanity to understand its place in the world and beyond. These are the rich stories that underlie our myths, traditions, and cultural heritage that Campbell analyzed and helped us to understand.
Campbell’s best-known work is, The Hero with a Thousand Faces, in which he breaks down the narrative structure of the Hero’s Journey.
If you have read or seen The Wizard of Oz, or The Hobbit, you are familiar with the basic narrative structure. Both of these are classic stories of the Hero’s Journey.
Although Campbell is much more detailed in his analysis of this art form, I simplify this story structure into three parts: a beginning, a middle, and an end.
In the beginning, the Hero or Heroine has a call to action in which they leave the ordinary world they are accustomed to. In Dorothy’s case, she is running away from her ordinary home life when she is swept up by a tornado and is taken to a different world—Oz.
For Bilbo Baggins, Gandalf shows up and encourages him to join a party of dwarves as a burglar on a quest to reclaim dwarven treasures. Although he is perfectly content in his hobbit-hole, he leaves the Shire to embark on an adventure.
That’s the middle part—The Adventure. We all know the adventure part of Dorothy’s trip to Oz, and Bilbo’s journey to encounter Smaug the dragon. Always, the middle part of the Hero’s journey has challenges and mishaps, and setbacks, and other characters along the way that help or hinder the hero or heroine.
The ending of the Hero’s Journey is almost always back to where it all started. Back in Kansas for Dorothy and the Shire for Bilbo. Perhaps Homer’s The Odyssey, a classic hero’s journey, illustrates this entire beginning to ending best. After leaving his home in Ithaca, then fighting in the Trojan War, Odysseus, the hero, leaves Troy to return to Ithaca, but his journey lasts years with many setbacks and trials before he finally does make it back home. But when he does, he is a changed man.
Always the Hero’s Tale is a journey of transformation. It’s an essential part of this narrative structure. When the protagonist returns at the end, they are changed, transformed in some manner. It was true for Dorothy, and also the case for Bilbo.
This is the story of our lives, each and every one of us is the hero or heroine of our own story, our own personal narrative. Sometimes we are the villain as well. Think of Anakin Skywalker, you Star Wars fans. From good to bad, and back to good at the end in an epic story of redemption. It’s an interesting character arc don’t you think?
Think about your own character arc and the people and circumstances aiding or impeding your progress along your journey. Along the way, often in response to challenges, we are growing, learning, transforming. We are each heroes and heroines of our own story, the story of our individual life’s journey.
In all of our lives, our own personal narratives detail journeys filled with possibilities, and with many twists and turns. Throughout these adventures, given all the unique challenges and opportunities we encounter, how can we each maximize our full potential?
The journey to self-transformation often requires us to confront our flaws and shortcomings as we travel from victim to hero. Our life stories are travelogues of adventure and discovery. Who travels without occasional slips and falls, cuts and bruises? Without damage or trauma? These story elements, these trials, help us to grow and to learn. Expect to accumulate a few or even many scars. That’s life, part of the human experience.
In spite of the challenges so many of us must contend with, despite being damaged, we can still emerge as heroes and heroines as we become the best versions of who we are and what we are capable of becoming. You have a purpose for being here. You are a unique and special person with superhero powers even if you haven’t developed them yet. It’s only natural to have doubts about accomplishing your mission and fulfilling your purpose.
A common challenge of the human condition, that many of us must confront, is to persevere and continue onward despite harboring doubts. It is a challenge to believe in ourselves and what we can achieve. It is a challenge to embrace destiny, discovery, and self-transformation, and it requires courage to face the truth. Rising to face these challenges is heroic.
Embrace your story and your starring role. You are the protagonist. It’s up to you to make your story a great one. After all, you are the hero or heroine. So, enjoy your adventure and do something heroic, like slay some dragons!
Journey well!
We talk about mental health journeys a whole lot around here. If you’re trying to make improvements in your life, it’s impossible to avoid talking about your journey. Whether you’ve journeyed for years, or just started out, it can be a challenge to determine what you want, where you’re headed, and how to get there. Your journey can start at any time, and it can happen in any order. We have wisdom for every step of the way.
Sometimes it’s the journey that teaches you a lot about your destination.
– Drake
Where Does My Mental Health Journey Start?Your journey doesn’t begin when you choose to. You’ve been going the distance ever since you learned how to walk. You’ll be journeying the rest of your life if you’re lucky. Your journey begins, as most stories do, in a place of comfort and monotony: the way things have always been.
When To Get To Work On Your Mental Health JourneySomething isn’t right. It might not be immediately apparent to everyone else, but there’s a part of you that desires constantly, and aches for change. Once you recognize your desire, you can begin figuring out what needs to change.
The Obstacles Of Your Mental Health JourneyJust because you’ve noticed something, that doesn’t mean you’re fully aware of it. Human beings are stubborn and fearful of change. In fact, humans are so stubborn that denial is an expected feature of any mental health journey. To fight through denial, you’ll need the right attitude, the right guidance, and the right guide.
Finding GuidanceThe easiest way to travel is when you’re with somebody who’s driven down this road before. That’s who your guide should be, someone who’s embarked on a journey of their own, and learned a lesson that you need to learn.
Taking The Plunge Once you’ve listened to the whisper, recognized your desires, and found your mentor, then it’s time to stand on the precipice of massive change! If you’ve ever done a high dive into a swimming pool, this is the moment where you stand on the diving board, looking down. The height can be intimidating. The process is prone to failure and likely to require multiple attempts to do it right. But your most valuable lessons are just beyond the surface of the water, if only you take the plunge and dive in.
Doing Things DifferentlyAfter you’ve committed to doing things differently, you can really start putting the lessons you’ve learned into practice. This can be difficult. You won’t be able to rely on your old ways of being and doing. It sounds counter-intuitive, but you’ll have to adjust to living the sort of life you wanted. Otherwise, you’ll be tempted to go back.
“And once the storm is over, you won’t remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won’t even be sure, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm, you won’t be the same person who walked in. That’s what this storm’s all about.” – Haruki Murakami
Rising To The Challenge Of Your JourneyWhen we are learning, we are tested. If you went to college, you could attend as many lectures as you want, but you couldn’t graduate unless you were able to pass your exams. On your mental health journey, you’ll be similarly tested. You may have to face lessons that you desperately wished not to learn. But on the other side, you’ll come out having changed.
Having ChangedOnce you’ve gone through all of this, you’ll be a different person. One who’s fit to go on new and different journeys with equally new and different lessons. Once you’ve weathered your trials, and made it out on the other side, you can share your wisdom with others and help them along on their mental health journeys.
You can also, of course, embark on another journey.
The story is told of a man attending a 12-step group to overcome his addiction. It is said that his older and wiser sponsor told him that he needed to pray. The younger man responded,
“But, I do not believe in God.”
The older man replied, “I did not ask you to believe in God. I only asked you to pray.”
Why is it difficult for some to believe in a higher power or a God? Many look around at the conditions of the world, and see this as evidence that there cannot be a higher power. They conclude, “No God would allow all of these terrible things to happen.”
Still, others struggle to believe because science is so compelling. Man’s answers seem to be almost better than any answers attributed to God. Those answers are sure and do not require faith and trust in someone or something you cannot see.
Still, others find it easier to believe that man has all the answers and there is nothing more than this life.
Again, why is it difficult to believe in a higher power? In my estimation, we do it every day. We trust something bigger than us almost every day of our lives, so why not believe in God?
For example, the other day I was heading to visit a new doctor for some testing. I had never been to his office so I punched the address into my cell phone and got the directions. My phone connected to a signal that I cannot see and told me the directions to go. I followed them. I made it to the doctor’s appointment right when my phone said I would.
Interestingly, I knew the area very well where the doctor’s office was. If I had chosen to go there on my own, I would have taken a very different route. I realized that had I taken the route I would have chosen (and not the one provided by the GPS in my phone), I would have been late for the appointment. I trusted my phone to get me there.
I am taking a business trip tomorrow. I have flown many times before. It is interesting to me, that most of the time when I get on the plane, the cockpit is closed. I just assume the pilot and his crew are in there. I do not know for sure, but I trust that they are in there doing their job. I occasionally will hear a message from them over the intercom. Yet, I never see the pilot, but I trust him to take me safely to my destination. So, far that trust has been well-founded. I trusted something I could not see.
Millions of people get on the internet every day and make purchases. We trust someone that we have never seen before to ship us the used book, the dress, the new headphones, or the latest gadget to us with next-day shipping. We trust some ratings provided to us by people who know this person and recommend him or her and we click out our credit card number. We trust that this is legit and we make it happen all of the time.
A couple of years ago, we discovered VRBO and Air BNB and started trying them for our vacation lodging arrangements. We got online and looked at some pictures of places we have never been. We read the reviews of other people and looked at the feedback other people offered and we trusted it. We made the decision to try the place out having never actually seen it, but trusting what we saw and read. Great times!
So, we trust higher power all the time! We trust in things we cannot see all the time. Tell me, you have not done a Google search or asked Alexa or Siri for the answer–and you believed what you found or heard! I imagine most of you have done this perhaps every day of your life. We look to something higher than us all the time and we trust it!
We live in a day where we go to Google more than God, Facebook more than faith, Instagram instead of Inspiration, and so on. We all trust these things without a second thought.
We act with faith every day that something bigger, larger, smarter, higher, or whatever than us, is trustworthy.
So, why not God? Perhaps you could make a place for Him too! You trust something higher than you every day of your life. Why not give Him a try? I promise you He will be there! He is real! He is there! I trust Him and love Him. He gets me where I need to go and helps me with what I need help with! Try it! Trust in God.
There are a number of reasons why I write so much about America but the key reasons are: 1. That I grew up spending a lot of time there and have a fondness for the country and 2. Now that I am retired, a lot of my investments are in the US market, and probably more than most Americans have invested in it.
When I was young and stupid, I thought of America as basically a good country that was out to save the world from the scourge of communism. But as I grew older and learned more about the country, I started to understand that I was wrong.
America is a country that has two purposes, one related to the other. The first purpose is to protect the countries that have resources that America needs and 2, to use those resources to create all kinds of jobs and taxes and a culture of mass consumerism in the country.
The threat of communism was way down the list if it was on the list at all.
There have always been voices that spoke out against this economic imperialism, but they were never given any real credence by the mass of American people who were basically politically ignorant. The big picture was hard for them to grasp. And many of those who did grasp it tended to ignore it because they had a vested interest in sustaining it.
And the people paid their taxes and got fed a steady diet of high-calorie patriotism. And it was all good until the Vietnam war came along and the chinks in the American armour started to show. And the young people coming of age started to protest and the government’s soft underbelly, thanks to Richard Nixon, became exposed and the dissenting voices started being heard. And the great divide began in earnest.
And both sides dug in. You could see it all play out every week on TV in All In The Family, which really was a microcosm of the whole country. And you could read about it in the news every day.
America’s government has always swung back and forth between the left and the right. But if you look at it objectively, the left-leaning governments were the ones that created the jobs and opportunities, reduced the deficit, and fostered good foreign relations, while the right-leaning governments ran up the deficit and created many fewer jobs and opportunities because their main objective was giving tax breaks to the moneyed interests that supported them and kept the war machine well-lubricated and financed.
Right now, the country is being governed by the left and they are working their way through a worldwide recession that most of the right believe is the government’s fault. And they have used this as part of their bid to take control of Congress. And when you have a willfully ignorant majority of so-called patriots, making the left the enemy isn’t really any sort of uphill work.
And while that may be a small victory for the far right, who now hold a narrow balance of power in the House, it’s anything but a victory for the people of America, because they now get to look forward to two years of obstruction and stagnation and regressive legislation.
Because the right only has one objective, which is to stop the left from doing anything for the country. All they want is power and control. And if history is any indication, they have no real constructive purpose in mind for this power should they get it.
The unique picture on the thumbnail below, as described by Terrilynn Renella:
This is after 37 radiation treatments plus hypothermia when they inserted the catheters for brachytherapy. It was so painful and in the months after that, I dealt with the worst pain of my life. The pain was unrelenting however I seldom used painkillers. I didn’t want to get addicted. I feel so blessed to be alive.
These are her own words. This is the epitome of courage! Terrilynn has literally faced her own mortality and has lived to share her story. Here are Terrilynn’s links: https://radicalremission.com/cancer-f…
Why do we take what others think, say, or do so personally? What is it about us and our belief system that interprets someone else’s actions (or inactions) as a judgement about us? When the boss rolls their eyes, we can see that they are discounting what is being said, yet when we take it personally, we may feel that WE have been discounted, not just the information we are sharing.
Most of us have learned or been trained to focus on the responses/reactions of others as a gauge of whether we are OK or not. If ‘they’ are not happy/satisfied/pleased, it must have been something we did, said, or something about us that created their dissatisfaction. We learned this through our training in an incomplete reward system. We only learned the first half of the reward system and not the second making it incomplete. When we did something that made others happy (sit up straight, say please and thank you, be nice to your brother, etc.), we were rewarded (smile, hug, lollipop, etc.). This had us learn that if we did what others wanted, we would (might) get what we want. And this is where it ended for most of us. We never got to the second half to internalize it so WE became our own internal reward system, and very few of our parents were able to show us how. No one taught them either. As a result, many of us learned, if others are not happy, somehow, it’s on us to make it better for them/make them happy.
There is nothing wrong with wanting to make others happy, yet unless it is something we are inspired to give, and give as a gift (without keeping score), we are actually seeking to change/soothe/control others in our attempts to get what we need from them (approval, acceptance, love, consideration). This pulls our attention away from ourselves and our own inner experience, and instead projects our attention outwards towards others and what they are saying/doing/wanting/rejecting instead. We use our energy to monitor how others feel and worry about what they think about us, instead of us considering how we feel about them. It’s time to bring our attention back to ourselves and realize that we are the ones that can give us what we need, and others are able to do the same for themselves. We so often mix them up.
When someone does or says something and we take it personally, we are making the situation about us, instead of just seeing it for what it is – the other person’s experience.
If we feel strong emotions and little choice in what they are saying, it is probably triggering our old well of feelings from our past that are ready to come up and out for healing completion and release. Often it is about how we think others see us vs. how we see ourselves. If we stopped caring how they saw us, and instead focused on how we see ourselves and on doing what feels best to us when we are with others, we would take our power back and allow others to do the same for themselves.
When we don’t need others to see us differently than we are, we stop caring what they think, and we can stop taking things personally. When we focus on taking care of what feels best to us, and let others do the same for themselves, we can stop taking things personally. Everyone is doing the best they can, and most of the time, what they are doing or not doing, has nothing to do with you. It has everything to do with what is happening to them.
To make the shift, we can switch from making assumptions and coming to conclusions about WHY people are the way they are or what they are doing/saying, over to the facts of what is actually happening. When we don’t know, our ego wants to fill in the gap of not knowing with a story it’s familiar with from the past. The hardest thing for it to do is to ‘not know’ what is going to happen, or why something has happened, yet the reality is, most of the time we don’t know, and we unconsciously create a story to fill in the blank.
We have a choice about that story when we bring it to consciousness. For example, in our home life, we can unconsciously assume the worst-case scenario and accuse our teen of frazzling our nerves when they didn’t call in at the designated time, or we can acknowledge that we don’t know what’s happening to them, and text to check-in while giving them the benefit of the doubt that things are fine. At work, we can unconsciously tell ourselves that our admin support was taken away when support meetings are canceled on the calendar, or we can acknowledge we don’t know what happened, ask what has changed, and learn what the actual issue is (technology). When we make up a story when we don’t have the information and do it unconsciously, we set ourselves up for taking things personally. When we notice the story we are telling ourselves and shift it over to the facts, we are back at choice.
It’s only personal when we make it personal. Most of the time, what others are doing/saying/feeling isn’t even about us – even when they say it is. Many times we are simply the person they are projecting their own unresolved issues/pain onto. It’s OK to let others see/feel how they do, even when we disagree with it or have a very different experience. When we put ourselves in the center of their story and feel we are the reason, problem, or somehow responsible, we make something personal that often really isn’t. It is up to us to decide what is true for us and to use the facts and our own internal experience and discernment, not driven by our fear-based stories, or others’ projections, to fill in the gap of not knowing. It’s time to allow others to be responsible for meeting their own needs as we focus on being responsible for our own needs.
How will you de-personalize what others do or say today?
It was another balmy Southern California summer graveyard night shift in the city of Orange. The only oranges to be seen were the two bright ones portrayed on the corresponding embroidered shoulder patches sewed on Gumshoe’s uniform short sleeve shirt. Additional oranges were pictured on the plastic “official city seals” that were affixed on both sides of the front doors of Gumshoe’s police car, a white Chevy Nova. In Gumshoe’s opinion, the large orange city seal logos on the outside doors of the painted white patrol car seemed to be a good target for a cop-killing sniper to “sight-in” and easily take out an unsuspecting “Officer Friendly”.
Gumshoe never felt comfortable nor ever at complete ease being positioned behind a bright orange target.
You have to understand folks that all of the orange groves that “once were“ along with the packing houses that created “the Valencia’s, the Mandarins, the Seville’s“ had long since been swallowed up whole by the encroaching adobe-colored stucco housing tracts with the obligatory shopping centers within the ever-expanding city limits Orange known to us coppers as the “Big O”.
While cruising the sleepy neighborhoods and commercial areas, Gumshoe had ample time to think of cascading thoughts about almost everything under the sun. In case it was under the moon. Gumshoe contemplating the riddles of the universe kept Gumshoe awake and alert especially when there were no radio calls. Sort of a Gumshoe’s personal time of reverie and reflection to pass the time journey on a slow, quiet night.
Hmm, Gumshoe would think: “Maybe a bit too quiet ke-mo sah-bee” as Tonto would remark to the Long Ranger. But of course, city police work in the wee hours never remains calm. Gumshoe always had that expectation and that feeling of anticipation that things would break his mental reverie.
On this particular evening, Gumshoe motored along the old side of the city that had narrow streets running through an eclectic blend of light industrial workshops and circa 1940 single-family housing. Gumshoe had all four windows of his cruiser down to take in the night air.
It was several blocks ahead of Gumshoe’s front hood when the sight of a “darked-out” (no lights on) racing vehicle came into view followed almost simultaneously by the sounds of angry metal being smashed with a visible shower of sparks flying upwards like a thousand fireflies illuminating the night’s darkness.
Deadly silence followed.
Gumshoe activated his overhead light bar and turned on his front-facing dual spotlights as he put out a “901T” (car crash) radio call at the hundred block on the street of this on-view incident.
Within less than a minute, Gumshoe was there. A late model mid-size car had been driven blindly into the rear end of a parked heavy-duty flatbed delivery truck.
There were no visible signs on the pavement of impending crash skid marks that would indicate any attempt of the driver braking. The car’s hood had jammed below the flatbed platform and the truck’s flatbed had neatly sheared off the upper portion of the car’s windshield and its roof beyond the side front middle door frames.
The strong acrid smell of burnt rubber assaulted Gumshoe’s nostrils mixed with the sweet aroma of leaking gasoline on the asphalt. No fire! Thank God!
Gumshoe readily spied the male driver and the female front passenger. They were both calmly and silently still seated upright. Their eyes were open with unblinking stares into nothingness. Gumshoe could then detect the odor of alcohol.
They were both absolutely and positively DEAD.
Strangely, there was no blood or gore.
Both of their skulls, just up from their eyebrows, were missing. Their skull caps were lying behind them on the back seats as if they were going to put them back on later.
Gumshoe’s cell light shone directly into the exposed portions of their heads. Gumshoe immediately thought of plastic doll heads, but in this case, these heads still had intact brains with no more thoughts to be thought.
Gumshoe pondered the unanswered question:
“What had they been thinking?” So much for Gumshoe’s quiet reverie on that graveyard shift in the “Big O”.
Always remember folks to love the ones who love you and try to love the ones who don’t.
Coram Deo!
This episode explores the importance of being compassionate towards ourselves and others and why we need to start with ourselves first. When you learn to be compassionate towards yourself during challenging situations, showing kindness towards others becomes second nature.
The Value Of A Good StoryI would sit by the creek reading. In my mind, I traveled on great journeys, fought in great battles, went to the moon, and rode with notorious outlaws. I was hooked on learning and wanted more. I had a library card by first grade. By twelve I was reading Henry David Thoreau. By sixteen my quest for knowledge took me out of school and set me on my quest of learning. I spent five years on the road playing music.
Life In Black And WhiteIn life, much of what we do is not as black and white as it seems. Growing up I often heard the old saying that life is a simple as black or white. Life is not black and white. It is a palette of vibrant color like a Van Gogh painting. It is laughter, joy, and song. It is full of texture, smells and many feelings. It is full of love, kindness, giving and compassion all these colors, the spectrum of life.
Every Window Has A ViewHow often do we look out the window to see the view? To pause and take a look allows us to see things we miss when we walk by the window and just take a glance. It allows us to slow down and truly see. It allows us to pause, reflect and understand the views we see in life. Every window opens to a different view and a different opportunity.
Autumn Of Our LifeWe start life as children full of learning and imagination and we progress through school, work, and careers. We work hard and devote ourselves to creating a life yet to come, a life that we dream about. We often call life a journey and that brings to mind many places and things over a long time. While I realize that we certainly have cherished memories along the way, the Autumn, when we have time just for the things that we love, is but a brief moment. The time it takes to walk down a dirt road.
I recently had the opportunity to sit with the President in the Oval Office for a conversation about matters past and present. The transcript that follows has been edited for brevity and clarity. Editing it for sanity would have been too much of a stretch. In the transcript, I’m identified as YT (yours truly), and the President is identified as JB.
YT: Mr. President, during your campaign for the presidency, you called a young woman a lying, dog-faced pony soldier. Can you tell me what that means?
JB: I’ve never used that expression in my life.
YT: Thank you. On another campaign stop, you said, “All men and women are created by the … co … you know the … you know the thing.” Can you tell me what you meant by that?
JB: Yes. Thank you for letting me clarify that. On that particular occasion, I was talking about the other thing.
YT: Okay. On yet another campaign stop, you were surrounded by children and you talked about how kids like to rub the hair on your legs. Did you think that was appropriate?
JB: Have you seen my legs?
YT: Well, no. I ….
JB: Come on, man. I have to trim the hair on my legs so it doesn’t hang over my shoes.
YT [gags]: Uh … you once told a group of truckers you used to drive an 18-wheeler. Is that true?
JB: No. That was taken out of context. I used to drive a steam engine for the Pennsyltucky Railroad when I was in law school. My dad used to say, “Joey, make sure you blow two for the crossing in case there are any cows on the tracks.” That’s why I invented the cowcatcher.
YT: You were at a town hall meeting in Des Moines in 2019 that was hosted by the Asian & Latino Coalition PAC. You said, “We have this notion that somehow if you’re poor, you cannot do it. Poor kids are just as bright and just as talented as white kids.” What did you mean by that?
JB: I was not at a town hall. I was at a Tupperware party. And what I said was, “We need to have tight lids.” Have you ever been carrying soup or one of those jellied salads in a cheap plastic container when the lid pops off? It’s a mess. But it is true that most poor people can’t afford Tupperware.
YT: Oh, boy. In October of 2020, you were asked by CBS News reporter, Bo Erickson, about your son Hunter’s laptop. You said, “I know you’d ask it. I have no response. It’s another smear campaign, right up your alley. Those are the questions you always ask.” Now that the laptop and its contents have been authenticated and there’s a Congressional investigation underway for which Hunter’s likely to be subpoenaed, do you have anything more to say about that?
JB: Look, I thought the guy was asking me if I wanted to go hunting with a laptop. That’s just ludicrous. Everybody knows when you go hunting, you get a shotgun. Plus, I think that Erickson guy was a Russian plant, trying to interfere with the election that was being held the following month.
YT: Right. During last month’s State of the Union address, you said, “Make no mistake about it: As we made clear last week, if China threatens our sovereignty, we will act to protect our country, and we did.” Were you referring to the balloons you had shot down?
JB: I was actually talking about the threats to our sovereignty by the almost three million immigrants that came across our borders from Mexico in 2022. But the teleprompter got the country wrong. And our border’s secure.
YT: I see. During the same address you said, “If anyone tries to cut Social Security, I will stop them. And if anyone tries to cut Medicare, I will stop them.” But the Democrats’ reconciliation bill you signed last summer took almost $300 billion from Medicare to boost insurance companies by removing leverage from negotiations on drug prices.
JB: Oh, shit! Is that what that was?
YT: On the same night, talking about non-compete agreements, you said, “A cashier at a burger place can’t walk across town and take the same job at another burger place and make a few bucks more.” Do you really think fast-food employees have non-compete agreements?
JB: No. What I meant was a guy who makes Big Macs at McDonalds can’t go to Burger King and make Whoppers because they’re different. But he can make French Fries because those are just potatoes.
YT: You also said, “Jill and I reignited the Cancer Moonshot that President Obama asked me to lead.” But your Inflation Reduction Act contains price controls that reduce annual cancer R&D spending by about $18.1 billion, or 31.8 percent.
JB: Come on, man. Those are just numbers. By the way, did you know the Oval Office used to be a rectangle?
YT: What?!
JB: Yep. When Jill and I got here, we ordered 400 containers of Spackle. Then we spent a weekend rounding off the corners to make the room oval.
YT: Oh, boy. Let’s move on. On February 3rd, a reporter asked if you take any blame for inflation. You said, “No … It was already here when I got here, man! Remember what the economy was like when I got here?” Setting aside the fact that the reporter was a woman, the annual inflation rate when you took office in January of 2020 was 1.4 percent. In 2021 it had risen to 7 percent. It now stands at 6.4 percent. What did you mean when you said that to the reporter?
JB: I was talking about the economy of Burundi. Do you know those people don’t even have toothbrushes? As a matter of fact, most of the countries around Burundi in Latin America and Crimea don’t have teeth after the age of 16. That’s why Vice President Harkness and I are inaugurating a program we’re calling BEAT: Buy Everybody a Toothbrush. And our slogan is, The BEAT Goes On.” Pretty neat, huh?
YT: Oh, my God. Okay. One last question. In a recent Wall Street Journal Op Ed, you wrote, “Millions of Americans [are] getting jobs with better pay,” now that you’re in office. But according to the America First Policy Institute, the average American has lost about $1,350 in purchasing power from your inflation tax. How do you respond to that?
JB: Oh, no you don’t.
YT: No, I don’t what?
JB: You’re not going to confuse me with numbers again. I wasn’t born tomorrow, ya know.
YT: No. I didn’t think so, sir.
JB: Ask me what kind of cereal I like.
YT: What?!
JB: Come on, man. Ask me what kind of cereal I like.
YT: Okay. What kind of cereal do you like?
JB: Fruit Loops.
YT: Do you mean Count Chocula?
JB: Yeah.
YT: Thank you for your time, Mr. President.
JB: Gesundheit.
I stress that I am in no way a space-science geek! But since childhood, fascinated by the various theories and continued discoveries.
The Universe (if there is just one and no parallel entities) started with the ‘Big Bang’ circa 15billion light-years ago and expanded at the speed of light; 186,600 miles per second (circa 300,00 km per second.
We observe the night sky full of stars and myriad galaxies including the Milky Way, where our solar system is on the edge of one of the ‘spirals’; seemingly insignificant considering the number of galaxies in the Universe.
I have a number of questions that are either simple to address or prompt escalating curiosity.
When the Big Bang happened, obviously there could not (or may not?) have been any space around it as the vast ‘explosion’ created ‘space’ itself. At least in theory.
What was ‘behind or in front or around that ‘space’? Was another side visible to Earth during the following billions of years?
Was actual space pushed out by the Big Bang? But what if anything was there before? Challenging to imagine a microscopic or even invisible force setting off the Big Bang.
The Big Bang commenced via zero content. A microscopic dot, with no space around it. Or was there already space around it?
But who or what pressed the button? Some form of divinity or pure science.
As the stars and galaxies formed from the Big Bang and expanded, had they the space to expand into, and space around them?
Like a ripple in a calm lake when a pebble is thrown in.
We view stars that originated from the Big Bang and were created by collisions and more as the Universe expanded following the Big Bang.
We view stars and galaxies ‘in front of us’ as the Earth turns around on its axis and moves around the sun every 365 days.
Stars and galaxies that ‘exploded’ from the Big Bang went in another direction? An opposite direction? From the center of a pond, the distance from one side to the other would be greater.
After all, it is normal for example, for a round object if exploded, to blow its contents in all directions.
Would stars on the other side be viewed as more than circa 14 billion years away?
The ripple on the lake created by a pebble would have a greater distance from one far side to another.
Should this be the case, could there be a vast portion of ‘space’ filled with stars never seen; their light ‘flying’ in an opposite direction; across the pond (not the USA in this case!)
Also, infinity. A startling thought. Should the Starship Enterprise aim for the ‘end’ of the Universe or experience closure similar to the inside of a giant balloon? Expanding but not possible to breach.
Imagining the Universe as an expanding balloon, are stars on one side visible to Earth, 14 billion light years away? Does the whole Universe rotate? If so, what would it rotate in?
Time, speed and distance are combined as one entity. And also gravity. Hence black hole stars. Gravity must have been overcome at the moment of the Big Bang.
Should the Universe have been created or happened circa 14 billion light-years ago. By what measurement? Are stars still departing from the ‘center’ of the Bing Bang entity?
The mystery of the Universe, parallel Universes, or multiverses will always be with us.
Should it be expanding what is it expanding into?
We talk of infinity, but can infinity literally have no end, if so, what is it contained in?
Come on Space and Science gurus! Any answers would be welcome!
I’d like to share an article written by Theresa Civantos Barber for Aletheia24h. It reminds us of how important it is to spend time with the elderly, especially grandparents. The article touched me deeply as I have been isolated from my grandchildren going on 8 years. I know that what little time I spent with them, holds deep memories for me that I will take to eternity. I just hope I left them something to remember their nana with.
____________________
As we bustled around the house cleaning up and getting ready, I heard one of my kids say, “It’s like the queen is coming to visit us!”
Yes, in a way—the queen of our family, my kids call her. My elderly grandmother was coming for a rare visit, and we were busy pulling out all the stops to make sure she felt comfortable and welcomed.
“That’s right,” I smiled. “Let’s treat her like a queen. While Grandma is here, we won’t do school or chores; we’ll drop everything else to spend time with her and soak up her visit.”
My four young children always have so much fun when we get to see my grandmother, and we look forward to her visits so much. It got me thinking how good it is for them to spend time with someone so much older than they are.
These are 3 of the reasons I love it when my children get to spend time with my grandma and other elderly relatives.
1. They learn to respect and value the elderly.
Pope Francis has spoken out again and again about the importance of respecting and appreciating elderly people.
“Where there is no honor for the elderly, there is no future for the young,” he has said.
By doing everything we can to honor and welcome my grandmother, my children are learning a valuable lesson that I hope they will carry with them always.
2. They enjoy friendships with people who are different from them
My children love to hear stories about my grandmother’s childhood, especially funny stories or stories about times she got into mischief!
They also love to play board games with her, and recently my son felt like a champion when he beat her at chess for the first time ever after years of trying.
By having fun with my grandma and enjoying her company, my kids are learning that they can be friends with anyone, of any age.
3. They get to bask in her unconditional love.
My kids always seem so relaxed and calm around my grandmother. This is not their usual mode of being, to put it mildly.
One time I asked them why she has that effect on them. “She doesn’t tell us what to do. She just likes being with us,” they said. In other words, she just enjoys being around them, and thinks their silly antics are cute and funny.
I was so moved. My kids are very young, but clearly, they could sense her unconditional love for them. What a beautiful gift, at any age, to get to feel this kind of love she gives them!
My grandma thanks me for our visits, but I believe my kids and I are the ones who benefit the most from the gift of her time and presence. We love her so much, and I am deeply grateful my kids get to have this wonderful relationship with her.
____________________
Today, we are losing focus on what the family is all about and how important grandparents are. I miss my grandchildren very much. I miss my grandchildren very much.
A craft is not a hobby to fill our leisure hours. It’s a commitment to a lifelong discipline, to a dialogue with work that deepens over time and takes some unexpected turns. Consider the evolution of celebrated artist Dale Chihuly. In college, he took a weaving class, learning how to insert glass shards into tapestries. After studying interior design, he began to experiment with glassblowing. Once he finished his a masters in sculpture from Rhode Island School of Design, a Fulbright fellowship landed him in Venice. At the Venini factory on the island of Murano, Chihuly learned the team approach to glass blowing that he would use to create stunning, large-scale work — way beyond what anyone thought was possible in this medium. Throughout his career Chihuly has pushed the limits of his discipline, inventing new techniques, and boldly experimenting with new forms. He drew on other cultures to create his Navaho blanket series and was inspired by Japanese flower arranging in his Ikebana series. In his hands, glass has morphed from a useful and decorative object into major public installations—his enormous walk-through sculptures immerse the viewer in a world of color, light, and fantasy.
The artist has pushed the limits in his life, as well, continuing to blow glass even after suffering the loss of an eye in car accident. After he dislocated his shoulder body surfing, he hired others to hold the pipe. Today Chihuly is an entrepreneur with a workshop and a factory to produce his most ambitious projects. If you haven’t already seen his work, the documentary, Chihuly in the Hot Shop, is a good place to start. And if you’re ever in Seattle, be sure to visit the Chihuly Garden of Glass next to the Space Needle, to see glass transformed into an architectural symphony.
Chuhuly Garden and Glass Museum, By Aschulkins – Own work, CC BY-SA 4.0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=62547811 Seattle.
The life so short, the craft so long to learn.
– Hippocrates
Craft is a dialogue between the beautiful and the useful, the known and the unknown, ending in a leap of faith. A maker—no matter what the material—is committed to the process of unfolding, in constant conversation with a medium that engages the mind, the emotions, and the senses. Some say that practicing a craft is like putting your soul on a stretcher—and if you’re survive this process, you will learn a good deal about the art of living. But it is also a matter of paying attention to the most minute details.
As a journalist, I have spent hours wrangling with the structure of a piece, evaluating every sentence for rhythm and flow as if it were a line of music. Following John McPhee’s advice, I return, over and over again, to the dictionary, reviewing my word choices, until I am certain that I have found the most accurate, and most compelling, way to turn a phrase. And, of course, I read incessantly, apprenticing to other writers. My library card is so dogeared, I’ve had to replace it, while over the years, I’ve spent a small fortune on a reference library. I keep my ear tuned to the latest voice in fiction, and enjoy those who break new ground—Orphan Pamuk, Arundati Roy, Dave Eggers. For masters of style I turn to The New Yorker writers like Joseph Mitchell who described the Native Americans who built Manhattan’s skyscrapers then profiled Joe Gould, a quirky but compelling Greenwich Village character who claimed to be working on “an oral history of modern life.” From Mitchell, I learned the value of exploring marginal people and scouting for stories in unexpected places. For sheer economy of style, I go back to two more New Yorker alums: William Maxwell (They Came Like Swallows, the story of a young boy whose mothers dies in the 1918 influenza epidemic) and “Talk of the Town” reporter Lillian Ross whose description of an encounter with Ernest Hemingway is wickedly delicious. There is always more to learn. After more than fifty years at my writing desk, the literary life remains one of endless challenge and discovery.
Traditional Japanese tatami makers, courtesy of Wikipedia Commons.Not too long ago, someone told me the story of an 88 year-old tatami maker who had made a thousand mats and finally reached that “aha!” moment where he felt he’d got it right. For most people who devote their lives to a craft—painters, poets, dancers, writers and weavers—it’s not the end result that counts. It’s the long pursuit of excellence and what one learns along the way. We expect to fail time and again, and accept that the end result will fall short of our vision. But then there’s the happy accident when we suddenly achieve our ends in a simple and direct manner. The work just feels complete.
And when that moment ends, we return to the practice of experimenting. Of waiting and not-knowing, approaching our craft again with “beginner’s mind.”
Hemingway once said, “We are all apprentices in a craft where no one ever becomes a master.” And so we just get back to work, remaining grateful for some glimpses of a higher truth. In those moments, we feel deeply grounded in our own being, and what we do connects us to a greater whole.
As Dylan Thomas observed, “The best craftsmanship always leaves holes and gaps…so that something that is not in the poem can creep, crawl, flash or thunder in.” I’m sure he was onto something. Native American basket weavers always left a break in the pattern so the soul could get out—-and Dutch woodworkers in the Hudson River Valley aligned their mantels, but left a tiny gap—careful not to tempt the devil with perfection. Each craft contains a whole philosophy and gives us some insight as well into the arc of human history.
Years ago, I lived in a 1790 stone farm house with such a mantel and with a fireback so well crafted that allowed me to heat the whole house from the living room hearth. The walls of the building were two feet thick and the floors made from broad oak planks that before the Revolution had been considered contraband, and reserved for the British navy. In this village in upstate New York, comparable to colonial Williamsburg, I learned how masonry and other crafts have played in the shaping of our American democracy.
Glenn Adamson, former director of othe Museum of Arts and Design, New Y o
As Glenn Adamson shows in Craft: An American History, colonists came to the New World with only a few possessions; they had to build their own houses, make their own silverware, pots and dishes, and create their own furniture. The most skilled of these craftsmen became fixtures in our early government—among them the noted Boston silversmith, Paul Revere and the printer, Benjamin Franklin—and their principles of economy, beauty, and balance were central to the formation of our national character.
“Craft has been many things in America,” Adamson writes. “A way of making a living, of expressing creativity, of pushing technology forward. It has a potent symbolic status, one so fundamental that is anchors our everyday speech. We talk about forging links, laying foundations, hammering things out, spinning tales. Conceptually, we knit things together and carve them apart. Craftspeople themselves are often seen as representing the best of America. Capable, trustworthy, and self-sufficient, they are the quiet heroes of our national story.”
Craft, Adamson argues, is crucial to our belief in egalitarianism, in a society where all men are created equal. While that ideal remains to be fully realized, craft has historically been the means for men and women to rise up and achieve new levels of status and security.
I needed to detach from who I was back then; the rose-colored glasses had grown pretty slim.Those arrows in the Darkness shot deep into my skin. The message I received was to stop and start again.How many levels of life do we receive? Every time I would open up, my heart would be deceived.So closed I live with shields and curtains.Everything gained gives back twice the uncertain. It’s as if the ship has grown a hole; bigger now than my very soul.I could burn the daylight out of you, but who would gain from living truth?We all hold secrets deep inside; the life of glue we scribbled to hide.Repent shall bring some peace to me; this was never intended for who I’d be.The colors smeared along the page; diamonds were cut to prove the age.Dash into those brittle bones. Take away the debt and loans.Trust me as I say this now.To balance this life; I no not how.
Ace is a distinct quality
This gives a person an enviable entity
He can exploit the space
In a given time to express
Hardly has he cared about his loneliness
He marvels at his prowess
He is thrilled by his exploration
He just marooned by others sincere ovation!
We humans admire quality and its clamor
It only influences on myriad with its unique color
Quality only having the potential to catch human spectrum
To transform quantity with significant appreciation at random!
We humans only perhaps can evaluate quality’s gravity
We are eclipsed by quality’s joviality
No other creatures on nature’s floor can discriminate quality from quantity
They all merely exist out of sheer quantity
When their numbers decrease
They are forced to go into oblivion with ease
Causing imbalance in the ecosystem we all are dwelling
Paving the way as nature script for all creatures for serendipity!
It is surely a wonder
How long living beings can infuse vigor to enhance nature’s glamour
Living beings hardly have any part to play
To keep nature’s intriguing design with gay
Sometimes they roll on alone like peas
Alone they explore nature’s floor in glee
Not knowing how they are disintegrating in galore
Making life moribund without any uproar!
We have to relate to everyone favorably, i.e. to give a good example to everyone as much as we can in order to break them with love, out of our love for them.
What does “breaking other people with love” mean?
We first need to understand that what we perceive of other people is not them in and of themselves, but an impression that exists within us. We then need to want to invert our negative impression of others to a positive one, so that they will understand how much we really wish for their benefit.
We continue relating to them through such a tendency up to a point where, as it is written, “love will cover all crimes.” That is, over the initial negative impressions—the “crimes”—love will emerge: that we will perceive no flaws in people the way we perceived various flaws in them through our egoistic picture that we previously held.
Also, what does it mean that our initial impression of other people is always negative? It is that we view others through an egoistic filter, where we constantly calculate along the lines of “What can I get out of them?” and “How can I reap some kind of benefit from them?” If we cannot find any self-benefit from other people, then we find no point in relating to them.
You Don’t See People for Who They AreUndoubtedly, we see people not for who they are. Also, it is not just people, but anything we see, we seemingly bring it to life according to what we want to see in it. People in and of themselves do not exist, but we see people according to what we want to see in them.
What does it mean that we want to see something in someone?We register various impressions from people the more we encounter them. Therefore, we do not know any people for who they are. We only know these images that we sculpt within us.
So many people in our lives simply pass us by, as if they do not stand out from the background. However, to the extent to which we get to know certain people, then we gain some kind of impression of them. We then relate to them in a certain way. Then, even before we start communicating with them, we already picture their image in us based on our previous impressions that we accumulated.
How can we ever
Count the cost
Of the ruins of war
And lives that
Were lost
Families who were
Once happy and free
Now struggling daily
Unimaginatively
Just to be
Voices that once
Sung loud, now
Silenced amongst
The crowd
The looking ahead
In the past
Was never feared
But brutal, bloody war
Leaves a legacy of
Violence and
hatred smeared
STOP THE WAR!
Gumshoe has always been fascinated with the wooden Russian “Matryoshka Nesting Dolls”. They come in different sizes and in various colors and with distinct details. The original doll conceals another smaller doll that contains another smaller doll, and so on until the parade of decreasing size dolls concludes with the tiniest doll finally revealed.
Gumshoe realizes that this may not seem to amaze most folks, however, Gumshoe had a past law enforcement experience to think about the “Matryoshka Doll” during his self-imposed solitary confinement.
Okay, folks, it is not what you may think. Gumshoe was not doing any “hard time” in the “joint” with the “screws” watching him. It was not a “Shawshank Redemption”.
Working major narcotic cases involves many hours, days, and weeks of just plain stationary surveillance. B o r i n g ! Mind-numbing to the uninitiated narcotics detective who had fevered fantasy dreams of “Sonny Crockett and Rico Tubbs” courtesy of the fast-paced “Miami Vice” TV show of the late ’80s.
Where was Gumshoe? Once upon a time, Gumshoe was a DEA guy in Los Angeles. Officially, a bonafide Special Agent for the Drug Enforcement Agency, US Department of Justice. What a mouthful! Whoopi-do! In street cop parlance, DEA really meant, “Don’t Expect Anything” or “Drunk Every Afternoon”.
In this regard, when Gumshoe left the DEA and got back into real city police work, he soon found himself assigned to an inter-agency police drug task force that focused on mid-level to higher-level drug trafficking organizations known today as cartels. Sometimes having too much experience and training can put one in a position that one may not readily want. In Gumshoe’s case, it put Gumshoe into the “submarine” as the sole crew member. Ahoy!
Gumshoe was considered a professional drug trafficking profiler as well as a court-recognized expert. It was a hardy “Welcome aboard Gumshoe, avast me hardy!” from the bosses.
The “submarine” was a nondescript undercover surveillance van. It got its moniker by being outfitted with a roof-vent periscope with a 360-degree turnabout that could accommodate a 35mm camera. The “submarine” also had an array of secret squirrel equipment that Gumshoe will not describe in any detail since it would be outdated by now. It did blend in and it was never “made” by the dopers and their bottom-feeding scum lookouts.
Okay, Gumshoe was blessed (or some may say cursed) with the ability to run silent and deep for an extended period of time to just observe and record. Ho hum!
Gumshoe, once secreted inside the submarine (that was driven into a targeted location; parked, and then locked up and exited by another undercover detective) would spend the following hours on end, observing, documenting, and recording details that would describe the distinct profile of illicit drug trafficking at the target.
Drug couriers, delivery vehicles as well as “mopes” working shifts within the targeted location would ultimately be identified.
Outside area surveillance teams were readily available to tail targets of opportunity that would result in the further identification of other targeted locations for drugs and/or money.
Working the case from the outside was a challenge for Gumshoe when undercover cops or controlled informants were not able to get inside the target.
How many hours in surveillance you may ask? Routinely, from sunrise to midnight and beyond. This surveillance would continue daily until there were sufficient articulated facts to establish probable cause to support a search warrant.
Gumshoe would go through several cans of albacore tuna, crackers, Butterfinger bars (sugar rush with a touch of caffeinated chocolate), and about a half dozen of bottle waters that did double-duty if you know what Gumshoe means.
Gumshoe had plenty of time to think. This is when Gumshoe thought of the wooden Russian Matryoshka Dolls. The outside of the submarine hid Gumshoe while Gumshoe appeared as an undercover repairman (who badly needed a shave, a haircut, and a shower) who concealed a narcotics detective “on the job” playing official “peekaboo” with drug-trafficking-dirt-bags.
A doll concealed within a doll within another doll as a regular guy who is a concealed Narc who was concealed within a surveillance police van that was not “Joe Plumbing & Electrical” as advertised from the outside. Wonders never cease.
Well, folks, that’s Gumshoe’s tale from yesteryear. Remember to always love the ones who love you and really try to love the ones who don’t.
Coram Deo!
PS: Sonny & Rico were cool with a great music soundtrack and had amazing wheels. No tuna for those guys!
I get it. We, humans, are hardwired to seek pleasure and avoid pain. Our lifetime of conditioning doesn’t help control our primitive survival instincts.
How come?It seems to me that when we are conditioned to be obedient and follow the Notebook, our self-awareness endowment — we were granted among other gifts — starts to shrink. A direct result is altering our emotional intelligence’s healthy development which requires maintaining the synergy between our left (logical) and right (emotional) brains.
When we fail to regulate our emotions, we give power to our primitive brain: we avoid pain and seek pleasure. We distract ourselves and numb our emotions.
No surprise we, humans, are the most horrible consumers in the history of our beautiful blue planet.
For someone like the former me who suffered from Imposter Syndrome — among many other mental health issues including CPTDS and a Savior pattern, I extracted tons of pleasure from achieving. I was a workaholic. So, again, I get it. If I hadn’t been harshly abused by a malignant narcissist four years ago to the point of deciding to commit suicide before being saved at the very last moment, I would have still been coping.
You don’t need to reach an extreme point of no return like in my case, in all likelihood — at least, I don’t wish it for anyone.
There might be different circumstances that would feel challenging beyond your bearable level of enduring pain and motivate your commitment to change yourself: the only thing you can control anyway.
When your spirit awakens and your soul can’t take any more insults from the way you are treating yourself, you can be sure that you will persist no matter how painful the inner work is.
If no major trauma takes place in your current physical existence, you may go on with your life, avoiding pain and seeking pleasure, and that’s okay as long as you are content.
The cure for pain is in the pain.
— Rumi
I wish I could tell you there was another way. But don’t take my words for granted. Do your research. Befriend ancient life philosophies and educate yourself psychologically. Then let me know what you found. Deal?
Pain is the purifier. Love pain. Embrace pain.
— Percy Cerutty
Think of diamonds. They are formed when concentrations of pure carbon known as graphite are subjected to a pressure exceeding 725,000 pounds per square inch and temperatures above 2,000 degrees Fahrenheit.
On a side note, when some people look at the numerous scars spread all over my body, get indignant, and ask, “why don’t you do anything about them?”, I smile before adding, “those are my cherished diamonds!”
Pain is sometimes the cost of a meaningful existence. I can handle that.
— Jeb Dickerson
I would have been skeptical, should I have read the above sentence before my OBE and later becoming a fur Momma and a stray animal kids’ fierce and fearless advocate. I grieve very frequently and will trade it for nothing in the world. When you love unconditionally, you pay the price. You know that pain will be a frequent visitor and you decide to welcome it with open arms.
Last wordsIf I didn’t almost kill myself before having an OBE, I wouldn’t have seriously and wholeheartedly committed to a self-transformation, in all likelihood. The pain of rewiring my program — no matter how seemingly unbearable it could be — is much less than what a suicidal person feels at any moment, and particularly during the darkest phases.
We are not to be blamed for our conditioning and/or traumas by-products. When our pain is not intolerable, we may keep ourselves in the victim’s box and keep running away from it. Nobody has the right to shame us for that.
A wiser choice, though, is to realize that we are responsible for our mental health. Also, we need to take it seriously as if our very existence depended on it because, in many cases, it does. I am one living proof.
That’s when we move from being a victim to victorious!
GratitudeAs usual, I want to thank all of you, dear readers, who decided to stop by and give this piece some of your precious time!
The word for today is ZEST
for how else to awaken our best?
How else to show up and grow up
and step into Truth
freed from excuse and no matter
the abuse that might otherwise
contain us although
who would blame us?
It’s scary out there
in the rarified air
that the brave among us
breathe and share through
their story-songs…their glory-songs
that lift us and gift us
with the courage and conviction
to live into our own mission.
These are the life-songs that challenge us
and imbalance us by asking us
to stretch far and wide
beyond both complacency and pride
reaching across false divides
behind which it would be easier to hide.
For how else to LIVE our legacy
rather than just worry about leaving one?
How else to sing out loud and clear
in defense of all that we each hold dear?
How else to speak Truth to power
at every opportunity and hour
rather than fight or take flight
or just freeze or appease or
seek to please?
How to stay the course?
With LOVE not force!
With RIGHT not might!
With GRACE and the God-given
gifts we came to claim
and to dare to share.
*This poem was written on MLK Day 1/16/2023 as I thought about what feistiness and fierce advocacy are all about.
from the heart, mind, and pen of Minx
Oh, boy. Won’t this be fun? According to the Wall Street Journal:
A team of researchers from China believe the Earth’s inner core has reversed its rotation after they analyzed earthquake-driven seismic waves as they pass through the Earth … the reversal of the inner core rotation would shorten the length of the day by a fraction of a millisecond over the course of a year, and might have a small effect on Earth’s magnetic field, but wouldn’t affect life on the surface.
The timing of this couldn’t be better. With latter-day shibboleths like climate change and the efficacy of liability-proof, ersatz COVID vaccines being debunked faster than the fallacy of the honest politician, we were in dire need of something to freak out about. Here it is, served on a silver platter — made in China, of course. And since the Chinese are giving us free balloons to shoot down every week, why wouldn’t we believe them?
Let’s Get Going
Hunter Thompson famously said, “When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.” I wonder if he had any idea how correct he was. We have more weird professionals cranking out more weird shit faster than the IPCC is fabricating climate models. And it’s about to get exponentially, astronomically worse because it’s only a matter of time until someone decides to use AI to aggregate all of the crackpot notions of history and make them available to every generative idiot with an internet connection.
The British novelist and short story writer, L.P. Hartley, wrote, “The past is a foreign country; they do things differently there.” He, too, gets more correct all the time. We’re accelerating the creation of the past more rapidly every day. This minute is radically different from the last minute. And the next minute may very well be unrecognizable.
The Death of Truth
It’s been said we live in a post-truth age. That one statement, at least, is true. Reasoned objectivity has been replaced by emotional subjectivity. (“Everyone’s entitled to their own truth.”) Empiricism has been replaced by selectivity and manipulation. (“The science is settled.”) Individual responsibility and individual agency have been replaced by group identities and identity politics, both of which encourage and pander to ideology. (“An ‘ideology’ is like a spirit taking up its abode in a body: it makes that body hop around in certain ways, and that same body would have hopped around in different ways had a different ideology happened to inhabit it.” [Kenneth Burke, from Language as Symbolic Action: Essays on Life, Literature, and Method])
When the fallacious contentions of those in power — the purveyors of subjectivity, settled science, group identity, identity politics, and ideology — are exposed, they simply reverse the narrative.
The only thing worse is that we accept every reversal without question.
Looking outside the backyard, plants and bushes cowering in the winter chill. Box hedging, proudly presenting new leaves, covers its pristine green, but nothing can remove the ornate shapes awaiting a ceremony of growth and charm.
Trees, bare of leaves, their naked branches beg for Spring. Doubtless communicating via their ‘neural’ roots below ground.
On a brighter note, early green buds have dared to present themselves ignoring Winter’s freeze. Lilac! Wonderful when blessing us in early Spring.
And birds? Pigeons maintain their ‘coos’ and friendship, blackbirds just carry on as if a summer’s day. But what about the tiny birds? Sparrows and even smaller, blue tits, great tits, and tiny robins. How do they manage the freeze? No extra layer of feathers. But they do.
Awaiting April and May, crocuses and daffodils will brighten the day……and heart.
Limitless views, infinity calls; leafless trees open the Universe, so far away over hills and downs.
Staying indoors and viewing outside is all very well but, always a desire to be released; wrapping up warm and defying the chill.
Walk closely towards trees so bare and hug one to prove we care.
Their gratitude is displayed in Spring, the same tree acknowledging the hugger. A mutual reward as Spring sunshine gathers warmth.
What can brighten a freezing day? Sunrise!
Glowing upon frosty trees, glimmering, sparkling crystals shining; thousands of twinkles as the sun raises its head above the horizon, greeting those who cherish Nature and her seasons.
Colors galore from sunrise to sunset. Imagination. Fantasy true!
Awaiting Springtime; accompanying optimism, positivity attracting smiles.
Winter’s Colors fade away replaced by the glory of a sunny day. Winter sunshine however dazzling, reflecting on blankets of snow.
Replaced by multi-colored
hues, Nature celebrates as we humans do.
Springtime! Not too far away.
Gumshoe in his never-ending readings stumbled across the above term “sitra achra” (???). Gumshoe learned that this term was Hebrew for “the other side”. Hmmm? The other side of what you may ask? Inquiring minds want to know. Gumshoe too!
Further digging by Gumshoe discovered that this term refers to the spiritual realm of evil—the domain of Satan commonly known as Hell. Yikes! Not a location on Gumshoe’s bucket list to visit. Sort of like the real “Hotel California”. Cancel my reservation and please keep my deposit! Gumshoe would rather suffer the pains of an eternity of going through Disneyland’s “It’s A Small World” ride.
“Sitra Achra” can be also understood as an emanation, i.e., an abstract but perceptible thing that issues or originates from a source. In this particular instance, EVIL. Now that got those tiny little hairs on the back of Gumshoe’s neck to tingle.
The late comedian, Flip Wilson, used to retort, “The Devil made me do it!” Flip was not far from the truth folks. The Devil plays his behind-the-scenes part, but folks definitely take the active part in the evil-doing of their own volition.
The legal terms of “malice aforethought” as well as “implied intent” comes readily to Gumshoe’s mind from past criminal law case investigations.
But of course dear readers (or fellow life sojourners) our lives are not lived in this emanation of the abstract but lived in a variety of existential circumstances of which we were born. Nincompoop thinking may venture that nature or nurture was the proximate causation for folks to commit evil. The Devil didn’t make them do it, they did it!
The rock was not a rational excuse for Cain for smashing his brother Abel’s skull. He committed the first documented murder and he lied about it.
None of us are victims of the circumstances we find ourselves in unless we choose that excuse. We all have choices. Making no choice is ultimately a choice.
Evil, however, no matter how you slice it, is never a valid choice. One’s moral compass has to be bent to consider evil an option.
Gumshoe knows that evil is real and it exists and thrives in our fallen world.
The 1930’s radio show had an opening line by the hero, “The Shadow”. He would make this haunting claim in his baritone theatrical voice:
“Who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men? The Shadow knows!”
Now that really made the back of Gumshoe’s young neck really tingle! The Gumshoe learned that “The Shadow” was spot on in his assessment of evil lurking inside the hearts of men. Just ask any present day or retired street cop for further validation.
Evil is a choice don’t cha know?
It has been said that the best trick that the Devil has played on us was convincing the world that he does not exist. Gumshoe remembers the secular song verse from “And When I Die” by Blood, Sweat & Tears:
“I can swear there ain’t no Heaven, but I pray there ain’t no Hell”.
Sort of an oxymoronic sentiment of hedging your bet. Gumshoe replies, “Who’s fooling who?” Satan‘s laughter echoes within the domain Sitra Achra.
The damned residents don’t share in his humor since they all freely chose to check into the real (and not abstract) Hotel California.
Well, folks, Gumshoe will continue to discover the abstract from within the real. Until next time, always remember to love the ones who love you, and even try to love the ones who don’t.
Coram Deo!
PS: On second thought, Gumshoe doesn’t want to spend his eternity inside Disneyland’s, “It’s a Small World” ride.
Surround yourself with people who invigorate and inspire you.
~Tony Michaelides
Tony Michaelides, author, and TEDx speaker, was David Bowie’s publicist in the late ’90s. Before that, he is credited with helping put U2 on the Rock n’ Roll map. He has also worked with the likes of Peter Gabriel, Sting, and Bob Marley. He is an icon of the music industry and shares not only stories of “Moments That Rock” – the title of his latest book – but life lessons for all of us to heed. Purchase his “Moments that Rock” Book here.
Floundering is not a good look on me or anyone. Yet, that is what I’ve been doing over the past year. Longer, actually. Phumphering around from one “great idea” to the next until all I’m left with is a throbbing head and a feeling of defeat.
If I were to see, on paper, how much time I’ve spent achieving absolutely nothing, I’d probably make a beeline for a bottle of hootch.
As many of my fellow writers have determined, Medium feels like a sinking ship. My earnings are in the shitter and my feed is awash with turds from either terrible writer wannabes, or bots. Who can tell the difference?
I’m sharing my feelings with you to help someone else who is floundering, especially someone in my age range. We don’t have time to f__k around folks! Where our “dreams” are concerned, it’s now or never. I don’t say this to depress you or make you feel worse than you already do. Instead, think of this as a virtual kick in the ass from someone who gets it.
My plan is to write a book. I know, I know. I’ve been saying this but I’ve actually begun taking notes for a memoir of sorts. Too, I may turn my screenplay “DEAD TIRED” into a book, as well.
With that, I still have to make a few bucks, especially now that I’m going to have a car payment. So, my plan is to start another newsletter on Substack and monetize it. If all goes well, I hope to launch a synergistic podcast and let my inner ham go nuts AF.
The new newsletter will focus on one of two topics in which I consider myself to be an expert: Cats and their care, and age discrimination. Hell, maybe I’ll do both.
What I am sure of: I’ve given too much of my time and energy to a platform that doesn’t give a FF about the writers who’ve hung in through thick and thin and the latter is all I’ve experienced of late.
I’m hoping these new ventures will energize me as I’ve been feeling sucked dry. And not in a good way.
What about you? Are you thinking about trying something new and different? Of forging a new path? Please, if you are, share with the rest of us and if you need it, we’ll kick you in the ass. Or at least, I will. You can count on it.
Perhaps this comes as a surprise to some, but humans tend to be messy, complicated creatures, and by extension, that likely applies to the majority of us reading this article. As much as we may like to typecast, assume, stereotype, or quickly judge people, chances are that if we actually spend some time getting to know one another, we will recognize dimensions of each other’s personality or character that perhaps were not so obvious upon first impression or our initial interactions.
That can be a very positive thing, but it also can be fraught with unknowns and sometimes revelations that we may not look upon favorably. Being able to “read” people is a skill that may be innate in some, but for others is only learned through hard-won lessons and sometimes disappointing or even bitter experiences.
That said, I’ve always personally gravitated towards people with a certain “richness of character,” who are multi-faceted (or at least give the appearance of being so), oftentimes iconoclastic in their own way, and more inclined to think for themselves rather than follow the herd. While this can be rewarding in terms of our interactions, it can lead at times to miscommunication, misunderstandings, or simply disagreements when either party stubbornly clings to a particular point of view.
Sometimes we have to make peace not only with the contradictions within ourselves but with others as well.
Separating our Wants vs. Our NeedsThe Rolling Stones famously coined the lyric, “You can’t always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you’ll find you get what you need.”
We can expend tremendous time and energy in pursuit of people and things that we want or have convinced ourselves that we want. With that in mind, it arguably is a good idea to give some thought to what we think we want and to be clear if this is truly the case, or if we are simply seeking a relationship with someone or possession of something for external validation. If we are completely honest with ourselves, how often have we found ourselves pursuing a relationship with someone, or a particular job because we thought that if we landed the relationship or the job, our lives would measurably be better? If we were successful in the pursuit, is this in fact what happened?
All too often, the things we want may fill a temporary desire or be motivated by factors that have less to do with well-thought-out requirements or necessities and more to do with outside influences. They may temporarily improve our quality of life or our perception thereof, but ultimately they are not indispensable. And consequently, we find ourselves disappointed or disillusioned in short order.
Needs, of course, are more basic and arguably less subjective, adhering to the Maslow Hierarchy and required for our continued existence. Without them, we either cannot live or will face serious challenges in attempting to do so. We need oxygen, we need water, we need food, we need sleep. Arguably, we need human contact as well and a sense that we are valued and that our lives somehow matter, at least to another living being. Some people are even content with keeping pets, perhaps preferring the company of animals to their fellow humans. Ultimately it boils down to love and acceptance because only a true misanthrope is capable of completely rejecting love from another.
Aligning our Values and Being True to OurselvesA perennial evergreen topic across social media channels it often seems are discussions about “authenticity,” which ironically enough, often deteriorate into something “other than,” in part due to the reality that social media is always curated. With rare exceptions, people reveal what they want to at a time and place of their choosing, whether that choice is consciously made or not. It has been my observation that those who pontificate about being “authentic” are oftentimes guilty of manufacturing what I sardonically refer to as “inauthentic authenticity” or, in other words, a flimsy facsimile of a narrative that they are trying to convey.
From my point of view at least, there is something decidedly unnatural and calculated about living one’s life very publicly and constantly broadcasting one’s activities and thoughts over social media. This invariably seems to add additional stress to one’s life and pressure to maintain a constant presence and online visibility and to consistently appeal to voyeuristic audiences. To each their own, but I’d rather remain something of an enigma or relatively unknown than subject myself to the judgment of those who don’t even know me.
That said, it would be hypocritical not to admit that I am often quite guarded in how I interact with people online and the information that I’m willing to share, at least publicly. This is for both pragmatic reasons and privacy, to whatever extent that still can exist, wanting to maintain some separation between career and personal life. Perhaps it is also a generational notion of not wanting to live my life online and not seeking approval or approbation from strangers.
No matter our personal philosophy, if we are attempting to live authentically, we do need to understand our core values and align them with our behaviors and the people and places that we associate with. And that ultimately brings us full circle, because life is indeed oftentimes messy, people are complex, and we all can find ourselves wrestling with not just our own contradictions arising from such complexities, but those of people we are drawn to and choose to spend time with.
I’d like to begin/finish this little excursion with a trip into quantum physics with only a particle of understanding. It apparently is a very challenging subject area with equations and theories on the constructs, dimensions, and layers of reality. I hope to express things in a simpler fashion, yet there is some complexity that cannot be avoided.
The GOD Participle? What the heck is that? I’ll get to that in a moment, but I want to keep you guessing for now. Meanwhile, I’d like to take a look at the infamous ‘GOD Particle’… Higgs-boson as it is known. I’m asking you to join me in an exploration of another perspective of possibility that is perhaps way outside the box.
First of all, let’s look at what the Higgs-boson is reported to represent. Let’s look at a few definitions from across the web. From the Free Dictionary:
A hypothetical, massive subatomic particle with zero electric charge. The Higgs boson is postulated to interact with other particles in such a way as to impart mass to them. It is predicted by the standard model, but has yet to be isolated experimentally. The Higgs boson is named after its discoverer, British theoretical physicist Peter Ware Higgs (born 1929).
Here’s another interesting take from the Science – How It Works site:
Can’t matter just inherently have mass without the Higgs-boson confusing things? Not according to the standard model. But physicists have found a solution. What if all particles have no inherent mass, but instead gain mass by passing through a field? This field, known as a Higgs field, could affect different particles in different ways. Photons could slide through unaffected, while W and Z bosons would get bogged down with mass. In fact, assuming the Higgs-boson exists, everything that has mass gets it by interacting with the all-powerful Higgs field, which occupies the entire universe. Like the other fields covered by the standard model, the Higgs one would need a carrier particle to affect other particles, and that particle is known as the Higgs boson.
Now, that might give you at least a partial working knowledge of what the excitement is all about for the ‘discovery’ of the particle. Here’s the really interesting twist, though… There was no particle, but the ‘decay’ of which was determined to reveal the existence of the particle even though it was never ‘seen.’ I personally find the whole quantum physics perspective a little far-fetched. Science is supposed to be about hard facts and repeatable results.
I’m fairly intelligent and it’s hard for me to wrap my head around a field yielding a particle that transmits mass to other particles. Maybe I’m just not smart enough to be able to understand the process.
It reminds me of the discoveries at Los Alamos that revealed the scientists observing experiments actually had an effect on them. So thought seems to affect the process, but doesn’t necessarily carry mass with it, unless it’s just baggage from a belief system.
At any rate, it just seems counter-intuitive that matter or mass is transferred via some theoretical particle. Furthermore, it would seem even more preposterous that an explosion would produce any such particle through fusion of the remnants, especially one that gives mass, except on Sundays.
Expansive Explosion for ElucidationThat explosion was the result of ramming two protons together at near-light speed. These ‘hadrons’ theoretically fuse together when collided and form another even smaller particle, a remnant. It’s like slamming two oranges together at breakneck speeds and having a fused seed as a result.
That really makes a lot of sense, doesn’t it?
Perhaps it does. With all the technical jargon and mathematical equations, the analogy gets lost in the intellectual vocabulary that only scientists supposedly understand.
Okay, so now that we’ve made some progress regarding the ‘understanding’ of the Higgs-boson perhaps there is another explanation or even discovery that has gone unnoticed by the scientific community. It would seem that the lenses from which they are looking might be a little skewed or undervalued by ‘what’ they are looking for instead of acknowledging what is really being ‘seen’ from simple observation. The discovery is just as magnificent but may come as quite a surprise if they are willing to look.
Of course, I could be totally wrong, but I think the logic will hold up at least for the purpose of sharing another possibility. Let’s start with just the observation of the explosion. It is at a sub-atomic level that is so small we need huge instruments just to be able to measure it.
In the electromagnetic spectrum and according to M-Theory, there are multiple dimensions or layers of ‘reality’ as one might perceive. The notion seems to be consistent with all the layers of bandwidth and understanding of the various frequencies that have been associated with different types of ‘rays’ whether from a scientific point of view or from an ‘ascended master’ POV. The latter involved varies ‘rays’ of consciousness instead of electromagnetic notations. Both probably describe the same thing.
So, this explosion then may produce a rip in the fabric between said ‘dimensions’ or ‘rays’ that is observable as the ‘decay’ of the particle in question rather than indicating an actual particle. The ‘decay’ is perhaps the reverse or ‘repair’ of the rip instead.
Part and Particle for PracticeRather than proving the ‘particle’ theory it may indeed prove that M-Theory is indeed true and yet unseen in this example because the eyes that were looking had a different spectacle in mind. As I said, it may not be true. However, I think it at least is worthy of some further consideration.
Alright, I mentioned the GOD Participle earlier in reference to the discovery. (I just have to share that there has been an appearance of a hummingbird several times outside my window as I’ve been writing this, peering in on me as it were.)
What is the GOD Participle? If you are an educator, especially an English teacher, then you’ll remember the definition of a participle:
a word formed from a verb (e.g., going, gone, being, been ) and used as an adjective (e.g., working woman, burned toast ) or a noun (e.g., good breeding ). In English, participles are also used to make compound verb forms (e.g., is going, has been).
The definition gives away the answer. It’s quite simply the most elegant word in the English language, too. In order to observe the process of how I came up with the perspective that allowed me to present an alternative view of the Higgs-boson notion I had to be in a particular place.
In the presentation of this place across a plethora of fields it is simply known as…. BEing. That is the GOD Participle. Perhaps you can explore it further on your own. I encourage that strongly.
Like the separation of people that religion promotes, scientific perspectives are no different. It would be amazing to witness great minds step back and consider the possibilities their discoveries may indeed provide for mankind’s evolution toward harmony among people and planet.
Science and spirituality seem to be on the same page in regard to the layers of bandwidth across the electromagnetic spectrum and the multiple dimensions of consciousness that we have barely scratched the surface in understanding, let alone garnering the wisdom it presents.
We can only see a minute percentage of the visible light across the electromagnetic spectrum. Here’s some information I found regarding the scientific calculation of just how much we can see:
Let’s examine the available information. The electromagnetic spectrum is usually considered to extend from radio waves to gamma rays, with frequencies from about 10000 Hz to 1019 Hz, respectively, while visible light goes from red to violet with frequencies from about 4×1014 Hz to about 7.5×1014 Hz, respectively.
So, if the entire spectrum is taken to span 15 orders of magnitude (log10(1019) = 19, log10(104) = 4, and 19 – 4 = 15) while the visible spectrum spans only 0.35 of an order of magnitude, then we can say that the visible spectrum is 100%0.35/15 of the entire electromagnetic spectrum, which works out to about 2.3%.*
But that is on a logarithmic scale, so let’s do the calculation again on a linear scale:
The entire spectrum has the range 1019 Hz – 104 Hz, which is 0.999999999999999×1019 Hz. The visible spectrum has the range 3.5×1014 Hz.
100%3.5×1014/0.999999999999999×1019 = 0.0035%.*
So, on a logarithmic scale of frequency, visible light is 2.3% of the whole electromagnetic spectrum, while on a linear scale it is 0.0035%.
If you would rather do the calculation using wavelengths I think there is enough information here for you to able to do so.
~John Link, MadSci Physicist
Thanks for allowing me to rent space in your head for bit. I hope you found value in the duration of our shared space.
Excerpt from … The GOD Participle – A Sub-atomic Stroll in Being.
I wasn’t with my Mom or my Dad when they passed into the next realm.
I say this as I feel that life comes to us in layers.
For how else might we arrive in a place Thick with Life and Thin on Time?
We are created to either grow up or the lights will dim; leaving us to question life and time.
Why does one die so young and others live through many seasons?
In our young hearts, we never thought about how long it might possibly last.
Then switch, we become obsessed with planning and arranging for our final farewell.
When should we begin to prepare for that?
Perhaps when the first gray hairs appear?
Or should we begin our plan of descent as soon as we arrive?
When you take a road trip, you plan it with a map; when I was born, why wasn’t I given that?
Life is meant to be a mystery.
The best lives are those that have shared face-to-face contact with an abundant number of children, teenagers, and best of all the people who have stacks of wisdom found deep within their eyes.
Perhaps by choice of solitude life is lived the best.
High on the sea in a boat so remote, or deep within the mountains as a quest.
All we can do is live by the guide of our beating heart.
Then one day time will come to switch, as if we were never apart.
If not for this belief, this hope; my heart would not be able to cope.
When the sky
Started to cry
I heard it softly
At first
Then suddenly
It trembled
The clouds
Got heavy
The bolt of
Lightning struck
The final blow
This time they
Knew they
Could no longer
Keep it together
They burst
A few months ago, while hiking a trail in the Keweenaw Peninsula of Upper Michigan, I noticed how effortlessly our group traversed the winding paths over rocks, under broken branches, through groves of trees, and along the water’s edge. What would have been a challenging route a hundred years ago today required little more than the ability to walk upright. As the trails twisted left or right, signs along the way pointed toward destinations of our choosing: South Shore, North Trail, Parking Lot
I noticed as we trudged through wooded areas the topography had dramatic variances. Even the stones we walked over differed in size from tiny pebbles to potato-sized rocks. Glancing left and right revealed patches of ground resembling trails but proved impassable due to overgrown brush and fallen logs.
What’s significant about a path?Such a striking difference between over-worn paths and overgrown paths. What is it that caused one path to emerge as the acceptable route for hiking while the other diverged into obscurity? The official trail could have been any of those passageways hidden under thick, overgrown foliage. The key to the worn path, the preferred path, the normal path is frequency. The hundreds of times that path was chosen over the other and the frequency of actions – steps multiplied. Repeated choices and repeated actions.
Start today: Repeat the choices and the action you want to be characteristic of your life.
Just as rugged terrain in the Keweenaw became a well-worn, passable trail, repeated travel and trampling by multiple feet for multiple years, our repeated choices and actions become ingrained habits of our existence. Habits are like our worn path.
To break a habit, get off that path.
To form a new habit, get on a new path.
Both are difficult. The reason is because habits form neural pathways in our brains. We, humans, crave the familiar and resist change, even if it’s good for us. While it is possible to break a habit or form a new one, expect it to take effort, because making new neural pathways is like forging a trail through overgrown brush and fallen trees. Expect some rocky moments, a few boulders, and even setbacks.
It helps to know your whyIt’s easy to say, “I want to spend 30 minutes outside every day.” or “I am going to read one book every month.” or “I’m going to exercise before /after work every day.” Those are good habits to form, but simply committing to them is a weak foundation.
The stronger foundation for any of those changes is know your why. Why do you want to make ‘that thing’ a path you continually trek every day or week? And there’s that nagging option of choice when you’d rather mindlessly watch TV than read a book. Staying inside on the couch is more appealing than putting on shoes and going outside.
Cement this thought into your conscious commitment. What do you want more? The familiar habit that drags you down or the new habit that raises you up.
What will you do to make that idea, action item, or goal a reality? Start small. It helps to have a Plan B to fall back on if Plan A gets a little fickle. Full transparency here, I have a Plan C….maybe even Plan H.
Remember. New habits are just hard.
Goal 1: PURSUE PEACE
I don’t have it all together. I am still working on new habits that by some standards are now old habits that I continually renew. Like this one, Pursue Peace
On my desk, I have a reminder of how to flood my soul with peace, so it carries over into my day-after-day life. Pursuing peace means the pieces of my day are Prayer, Exercise, Accountability, Contentment (gratitude), and Encourage.
Do I flawlessly make each of those pieces part of my day? No. But I know why my goal is to pursue peace and when I get off track, it’s easier to talk myself off the ledge of giving up.
My verse for this year is Philippians 4:8 and also verse 9.
Philippians 4:8-9 says: Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.
A life of peace starts with thoughts that are peace-filled. Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right … start there.
Thoughts become Actions
Actions become Habits
Habits become Lifestyle
1Peter1: 6-8 says: Make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; 6 and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, mutual affection; and to mutual affection, love. For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.
Lost in the search
Searching, yearning
for something more
for something less
the noise of the search
becoming unbearable
the search for stillness
sits deep within me
struggling to be
I’m lost in the search
in the silence, I hear only noise.
This article was inspired by the following question and answer from “I Am That,” a well-known spiritual book that chronicles talks between Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj and seekers who were eager to recognize true Self:
Q: “Is there no way of making out who is realized and who is not?”
M: “Your only proof is in yourself. If you find that you turn to gold, it will be a sign that you have touched the philosopher’s stone.”
The philosopher’s stone was believed to be a substance that was capable of transforming ordinary metals such as iron, tin, and nickel into gold; this is the metaphysical alchemy of which many of us may have read or heard. The related Truth, however, goes much deeper than a claim to transform base metals into gold. At its most profound level, it’s about transcending our false self through the recognition of our divine essential nature.
To touch the philosopher’s stone, we must (as Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj expressed) be earnestly eager to recognize the Gold which we actually–already–are. Such means that we are no longer willing to blindly believe our long-held assumptions related to human identity. We desire to dive deep into the very nature of our Being, and we will not relent until we directly KNOW the answer! “Who Am I?”–really–will be the burning question in the foreground of our daily life.
The process involved in realization cannot be forced through efforts related to our egoic “self;” to do so, in fact, almost certainly dooms our efforts to failure. To touch the philosopher’s stone, we need not collect endless amounts of information about true Self; nor must we make unnecessary pilgrimages to ashrams or holy temples. Right where we are, we may become a knower; but to do so, we must leave behind what we have accepted as fact. For seekers who are ripe for realization, the following quote attributed to St. Francis of Assisi contains a potent hint:
What we are looking for, is what’s looking.
In our spiritual quest, we must cast aside all of our apparent history, beliefs, and assumptions and dare to step–barer than naked–beyond our ignorance. We must discern clearly between what is real and unreal. In the stillness of now, free of interpretation, we will recognize the Source of our Being. No “person” ever becomes enlightened; to touch the stone, in fact, means that we awaken from the delusional belief that we ever were the person. This occurs in a similar way that we shrug off the fictional character we were playing in a nighttime dream.
When false beliefs and assumptions related to our egoic “i” fall away, we knowingly merge with the Gold to which Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj referred. There, beyond name and form, That which is the eternal and immutable Source of all that was, is, and will be, is found. We cannot, however, ever point to It (“lo, here It is,” or “lo, there It is“); for such would mean that we were still mired in the perspective of duality–a subject pointing to an object. The Oneness of Infinite Being is beyond all conceptions and perceptions. Eternally, It is both everywhere and nowhere–a no “thing” that can never be objectified, but out of which all apparent things–including our body-mind, arise.
The Truth of the philosopher’s stone is that you–as true Self–“are” It. We figuratively touch the stone through direct recognition and are, thereby, transmuted into the golden child of God that has always been our true “I Am-ness.” Only through our ignorance have we believed it possible to be separate and otherwise. Free of the chatter of the mind, we, thus, know the deepest meaning of Psalm 46:10: “Be still and know that I am God.” To understand this deeply is to realize there is a difference between the definition you hold of yourself, and That which you truly are.
When we awaken to our essential nature, our paradigm of “reality” must also change; it is through this knowledge that we engage the true magic related to the philosopher’s stone. Plutarch summed up the principle involved through the following quote: “What we achieve inwardly will change outer reality.” Centuries later, this was echoed by Paramahansa Yogananda, who stated that “the mind is the creator of everything.” To Know Thyself is to touch the philosopher’s stone.
Dare to dream (and care for one another).
With heartfelt regards,
Art
The WriterHe was a local hero for a while holding court with a new generation of apprentices. His books were local Lowcountry gothic novels. He loved Edgar Allen Poe, Hemingway, and Harper Lee. As the years passed people’s interests changed and his books sold less and less. He came to sit at his table by the window every day. For a while, his love from Charleston came to be with him and he was happy but in time she too faded away. He had no children, so he became a recluse spending his days at the café. He lived in a nice apartment over the café, a benefit from the success of his first book.
A Cottage By The SeaIt has been a while since I have been to my cottage by the sea. The cottage is warm and welcoming with a breeze blowing the curtains. In my favorite leather chair by the window lays a book that I didn’t finish, a story of the sea and of great adventures of old. The book, a companion, a friend, a door to walk through, or a page to turn. It lays there waiting just where I left it, waiting for my return. The bookmark still there between the pages where the story was interrupted.
The Empty RoomThe empty room is silent the only noise is the creaking of the chair as I move to pick up a tin container. It is an old tin with a Norman Rockwell painting on the lid. The one of a boy and his dog. Inside I find some marbles, baseball cards, an old black and white school photo, and a check yes or no love letter. I feel like I am eavesdropping on these moments in time and the stories that still live here.
The Quiet ManDaddy believed in doing. He was not one for talking. I spent a lot of time with him in the fields and later riding with him when he drove a truck. He taught me about life by showing me and being an example and a testament to what he taught. I learned by watching and listening. I think the one thing he said the most was to use common sense.
First of all, I acknowledge Carol Campos for her article on risk-taking as it motivated me to respond.
I have taken a number of risks in the past. The most critically damaging taken at the time was moving from one good country career-wise to another; with dramatically negative consequences. But had the risk not been taken, a most superb opportunity would not have led to another.
Taking a risk may be heart-driven, but I do not think so every time. Vibes. The heart, I believe, is similar to an entity that can almost foretell the future. The blatant risks I took were detached from my inner sense, my sixth sense, and far away from my heart’s subliminal ‘advice’
Looking back at the risks taken, one especially ignored good sense, and reality and ignored my heart’s alarm. However, had I not taken such a profound risk, life would have turned out negatively.
Without taking risks, we will always address the ‘what if’ factor. Energy, self-confidence, and determination can be the driving factors.
Only when you look back will you acknowledge that taking a risk was ideal. At the time, during a potentially awful period, taking the risk was blatant lunacy.
But all’s well that ends well. Lessons were learned and signals were respected.
We are now in a new lunar year —the year of the water rabbit. It is yin rather than the full-on yang year we had in 2022. This means that the energies tend to be more gentle and there is a call for more reflection rather than trying to make things happen. For many, last year will have brought up stuff for you to heal and 2023 is really about giving yourself the space and possibly investing in the support to do that. To help, I will go deeper into some of the key themes of the water rabbit year via a series of articles. For this first one let’s unpack the quotation:
I believe truth is revolutionary; it’s part of the work of fierce love.
~Jacqui Lewis
Consider this question: how often do I avoid sharing my truth?
Be honest. It’s probably more often than you realise and there will be many reasons why you do it. If we consider the current energy of the year, the essence of water can be summed up with the following question: is it safe?
Many people have a fear often at the unconscious level that if they tell their truth it will be rejected and/ or it might cause conflict. For others, there may be the fear that they will lose a friend and so they keep silent. And in really challenging situations many practise the avoidance leadership style.
In these circumstances, the individual drops the other person or the activity. Initially, this makes it a lot easier because you don’t have to deal with that person or their energy. The reality is somewhat different so let me explain why.
We see the world not as it is but as we are.You have somewhere around 12,000 and 60,000 thoughts a day! And often you are not conscious of them, and yet thoughts take on form. The pain you experience is when something happens and you decide whether that’s a good or a bad thing. The ideal is to be completely detached from what is happening on this earth plane adopting the Taoist principle that it is what it is. As soon as you connect a positive or negative feeling to a thought it has an impact on you and those around you. The first step to changing this is to realise that you have no neutral thoughts.
Why avoiding an issue does not work?Avoidance seems like an effective strategy. Perhaps you have decided to step back from a relationship where you feel conflicted. It may feel easier but in effect what you have done is close your heart to that person and quite possibly gone into judgement about them or their activity. There will be heaviness and it’s as if your energy has a smell so if you come into that other person’s orbit they will realise straight away that the relationship is out of alignment. Effectively what you are doing is carrying unprocessed emotions around and at some point, they will leak and quite possibly on someone you care deeply about. More than that whatever you are doing to another you are doing to yourself. In this case, giving someone a wide berth is akin to cancelling out a part of you. I say this because we are all one; there is no separation.
What is the cost to you?I expect if you asked anyone they would say they would like a miracle. They may not use that word. Rather they might say they want a better job, a warmer relationship with a loved one. You have the power to have all or any of that if you clean up your thoughts.
Miracles are in fact naturally occurring events that come out of love. Let me give you an example. A shopkeeper is worried because he is not selling enough stuff to make a decent living. Stuck in his concerns, he often appears preoccupied to customers and distanced from them. They do not enjoy the way he appears and so they start avoiding his store and taking their business elsewhere. The shopkeeper’s moodiness has impact on others and so his fears of lack become real as his way of being drives away existing and ultimately potential customers.
The so what factorLiving as if love is the only thing that is real is hard work at first as is working out at the gym or any kind of physical exercise. It takes discipline and commitment. When you work out regularly you may notice an increased sense of wellbeing. We know that exercise releases the brains feel good transmitters called endorphins. Similarly, when you start to train your mind by releasing all the conditioning you have collected during your lifetime, you are allowing the possibility of more joy. Experiencing bliss is your birthright.
Have you got what it takes?Going back to our original focus on speaking your truth rather than living a lie, where do you stand on that now? As someone who tends to question the dominant narrative and who is known for being genuine, I can make others feel uncomfortable. It is one of the reasons I have very few friends because I prefer real conversations. The reason I take this stand is expressed so brilliantly in the following excerpt:
Truth makes a personal, spiritual, ethical, and moral demand upon us. It wants to be said, known, told. It hurts and it’s inconvenient, but it’s essential to our well-being.
~Jacqui Lewis
Peggy Liu, University of Pittsburgh, and Lauren Min, University of Kansas
The Research Brief is a short take about interesting academic work.
The big ideaThe next time you wonder whether to reach out to a friend, family member, classmate, or other person who’s been out of touch for a long time, go ahead and do it. According to our just-published research, it’s likely they’ll appreciate it more than you think.
In a series of 13 experiments involving over 5,900 participants, we – along with colleagues SoYon Rim and Kate Min – wanted to investigate whether people accurately predict how much their social contacts appreciate being reached out to.
In one experiment we conducted, college students wrote a note “to check in and say hello” to a classmate they hadn’t interacted with in a while. Then we asked them how much they thought their classmate would appreciate receiving this note. Next, we delivered these notes to their classmates and asked the recipients how much they appreciated receiving them. We found that the students who received the notes were much more appreciative of the gesture than the students who wrote them had anticipated.
Other experiments varied the scenario by involving older adults as participants rather than college students, switching the written message to a small gift – such as cookies or coffee – and comparing how much the sender underestimated the appreciation that an emotionally distant contact would feel compared with a close contact. Overall they yielded the same basic finding: People tended to underestimate how much others appreciated hearing from them.
What drives this underestimation? Our results suggest that it’s related to how little the people reaching out factor in the surprise felt by those being contacted. When we asked recipients what they focused on when indicating how appreciative they felt, they reported paying a lot of attention to their positive feelings of surprise, which were linked to how appreciative they felt.
Comparatively, potential senders did not report focusing much on recipients’ positive feelings of surprise. It also mattered whether the two parties were already in a close relationship. People’s underestimations were even greater when their contact was a distant acquaintance because these recipients were especially surprised at being contacted.
Why it mattersMany people can name at least one person with whom they would like to reconnect. Taking a new job, moving to a different city, becoming a parent, or the busyness of everyday life – these are just some of the life events and circumstances that can cause people to lose touch. Then, if the desire to reconnect arises on one side, doubts may arise about whether the other person may appreciate being contacted out of the blue.
When people consider taking the initiative to reach out, especially after a prolonged period of no contact, they may worry about being rejected. This worry might keep them from reaching out in the first place. Our research lessens this challenge by showing that often, these gestures will be much more appreciated than one might expect.
What other research is being doneOur findings fit within a growing stream of research examining the tendency to underestimate others’ appreciation of various social exchanges. For example, other researchers have found that people underestimate how much others appreciate receiving compliments or expressions of gratitude.
Our work adds to this area by broadening the scope of the contexts in which people underestimate how much social exchanges are appreciated. Reaching out could but need not require giving compliments or expressing gratitude – the gesture can be as simple as checking in with someone to show that one is thinking about them.
Peggy Liu, Ben L. Fryrear Chair in Marketing and Associate Professor of Business Administration, University of Pittsburgh, and Lauren Min, Assistant Professor of Marketing, University of Kansas
This article is republished from The Conversation under a Creative Commons license. Read the original article.
If you ever wonder about how to think like an expert, the difference between your inner critic and the actor within, your ability to be heard, the value of being a musician, how to protect yourself from liars, or how to overcome fears, you will find answers in this book.
Through each chapter, there is a magic wand taking you into an area of life that you may have experienced yourself or it will be something new to consider. There is synthesis between the known and unknown, the seen and unseen, the mental and the physical, the desires of the heart and the aspirations of the spirit; and the overall theme of we are all just trying to make it from one day to the next with joy, peace, and happiness.
Joseph gives his own insights throughout the pages of what he believes are the backbone of our life experiences – both the great and the not-so-great. He leaves it up to the reader to discern what is true for them. You will find yourself wanting to explore more of each of his analysis of life’s nuggets, many of which we create ourselves through questions, desires for specific outcomes and the need to be heard.
CLICK HERE TO GRAB YOUR PERSONAL COPY
I recently had to make a trip to the tire store to get new tires. I know nothing about tires, so this is always an adventure for me. Ultimately, I chose what they recommended. Then, they wanted to talk to me about alignment packages. I could purchase this now and supposedly save money later. It sounded good, so I signed up for it!
What is alignment anyway? On my car, it means all the tires are evenly matched, lined up straight, and pulling me directly down the road. When tires are out of alignment, the car will pull to the right or left, the tires will wear out improperly, and the steering wheel might shake.
None of these things are necessarily life-threatening in the moment, but not good if allowed to continue for a long period of time! Good, solid alignment is essential to smooth travel down the road!
Strong and solid alignment is even more essential for people. If you want to travel smoothly and safely down the roads of life, you have to be aligned. If you don’t want to wear out too quickly, get pulled in wrong ways, and stay solid, you must be well aligned.
So how does alignment work for people? What do you need to know?Most difficulties for individuals come when behavior and belief are not in alignment. In short, when you believe one way and act in another way, you are out of alignment. This can be a major cause of depression, anger, anxiety, and a host of other emotional and relationship challenges. Alignment between belief and behavior is so very important.
For instance, if deep down in your heart, you believe in being honest, but you are cheating on your papers for school, you are out of alignment. If you espouse a strong work ethic, but spend work days wasting time on social media, you are out of alignment.
You get the point. Believe one thing-do another, always equals difficulty.
Check out these simple steps to get to better personal alignment:First, make a list of the things you truly believe about yourself, about life, and about how you believe people should conduct themselves. Write down only the things you strongly believe in. For example, my list would say “I believe in the importance of regular physical exercise.”
Making a list of what you truly believe is helpful because it causes you to really reflect, examine your priorities, and decide what you really feel. Take some time to do this. Your goal is not to “one and done” and get everything on a piece of paper in a single setting. Add to it as different ideas come to mind.
Second, examine the things that irritate you the most about yourself and others. If you pay attention, these can be the “dashboard lights” to indicate a belief beneath the hood. For example, I hate it when people speed ahead and then swerve over at the last minute. If I follow that irritant to the root, I find myself seeing respect and integrity. I believe in these things.
Third, as your list starts to come together, start asking yourself questions like “How does my conduct measure up to my beliefs?” For example, I mentioned that I believe in the importance of regular physical exercise. Is my current behavior matching that belief? Not too difficult to see. Am I exercising regularly right now? If yes, I am in alignment. If not, I might wish to make some changes!
Finally, when you find something out of alignment—when a belief and a behavior do not match up—consider setting a goal to make a change. Set goals based on what you believe. When you start to match up your actions with what you believe, you get the personal power to make a change. You tap into that part of us that always wants our beliefs and our behaviors to match.
Alignment is important for cars. It is essential for people! When the wheels of behavior are aligned with the axle of belief, you get top speed through life! Even more, life just moves more smoothly when what you espouse matches what you do! Let’s get things lined up! That will get us there!
As a child, you needed to survive emotionally!• You were so well trained to make use of quick fixes whenever you experience any uncomfortable feeling.
• You were taught your ‘negative’ feelings were not legitimate and needed to be instantly suppressed.
• You were erroneously told your vulnerability was a weakness.
• Your caregivers never explained to you that feelings were merely messengers. Moreover, they never modeled how to respect and honor one’s feelings, sit with them, embrace them, and go through them for a healthy release.
Appealingly, until we could find our trigger in adulthood — hopefully during this physical existence, we would continue to be clueless about the root causes of our hopelessness and helplessness, sadly enough.
Having a ‘Savior’ pattern, like most highly sensitive folks whose “free will” chose the unaware empath*** path when attempting to cope with their unfriendly environment, doesn’t make things any easier.
I am familiar with the trap. Interestingly, what is mind-blowing, to me, is that yielding my rescuer pattern, in general, has been more demanding than rewiring the major part of my subconscious program. The resistance has been fierce, to say the least.
I destroyed four belief levels and my innocence with them. I, respectively, replaced them by:
- Not all mortal beings are inherently good.
- Toxic inherently good people don’t deserve my investment.
- Even non-toxic ones wouldn’t earn a chance unless they asked for support/active ear explicitly.
- Trust is a shared responsibility in relationships. Fantasizing about the potential does not make it a reality. If one mistake destroys trust, then there has never been any built reserve in the first place. Investing and being consistent with your deposits doesn’t guarantee that the other person pays attention and considers it.
I explored the last belief level in detail here where I told the incident that triggered it, should it feel worthwhile: Trust Is a Shared Responsibility in Relationships.
Last wordsIf you can recognize yourself in today’s topic, I want you to know that I feel you! (Un)becoming the lifetime of conditioning filter and learning to reconnect with our authentic self is anything but something you learn overnight, particularly if you are a highly-sensitive empath!
Should you be armed with tons of self-awareness, humility, patience, bravery, and consistency, sooner or later, you will start seeing the fruits of the most rewarding investment of your whole existence: investing in your self-evolution so that your future version and the Universe would be grateful to you!
No matter what your self-bully might be telling you, don’t believe a single word! Your inner power is limitless and you have what it takes to break free. It’s only limited by your current belief system you never chose in the first place.
You always have the option to choose differently and I hope that you’ll go for it!
*** A very empathetic person with emotional weak boundaries who struggles to say no, who would please others at their expense, who would absorb their surroundings’ toxic energy and confuse others’ feelings with theirs.
We are so used to living in a world of analysis that we don’t even realise we’re doing it. But once you see and feel the difference of reality first, then logic— you’ll realise the transformational difference it makes.
I was asked yesterday if I’d like to enter a programme to get a Ph.D. by critiquing and analysing mine and Sara’s new book and I noticed the clarity that doing that made no sense. I reflected on this after the conversation and realised again the difference between analysis and logic.
Analysis is opinion.It’s a conceptual ideas-based activity. It’s about my opinion vs your opinion. It’s about what I think is right/wrong, good/bad. It’s about judgements and comparisons and critiques. Which are all fine, but which are no place to find sanctuary or security.
I don’t know about you, but my ideas have continually changed throughout my life. I’d be surprised if yours haven’t too. So to hang my hat on any idea or opinion, and think that I will be OK by holding that opinion, and thinking I’m right in that opinion, is shaky ground to stand on. Because it can so easily change.
As soon as I’ve fixed on an opinion, the world comes and shows me counter-evidence, and exceptions to my rule, and examples where my opinion simply can’t stand up.
From here we have two choices — we can cling to that opinion even tighter and become more deeply entrenched and fixed, and as a result experience the extra buffeting of life as it tries to wake us up from our false fixed-ness. Or we can realise that no opinion is a permanent truth. And therefore analysis is not permanent either.
I analysed theories and models as part of previous educational processes. If I analysed those same things today, I’m pretty sure I would have a different perspective. Clearly, neither is permanent, and therefore neither is True. If I’m trying to find sure-footedness through analysis to find the ‘right’ answer — well, which is right? No sure-footedness to be found. Just a bunch of conceptual ideas and opinions, and always subject to change.
So analysis is an opinion. It’s my opinion or idea right now. And it will change as I change. And it will either bump up against your opinions and ideas, or align with them, and everything in between. Staying in this space keeps you at a distance from life. It keeps you in the head and in ideas and stories. And the head is fine. There’s no problem with the head and its ideas in and of themselves. Our idea-generating capacity is incredible! But to only exist there, and to go there as your primary reference point, is unsatisfying.
Let’s look at logic to see why…
Logic is borne of reality.Logic is a way of using conceptual words and ideas to describe what’s been discovered. The concepts used to do that could vary, but the reality they’re all pointing to is agreed upon.
Let’s take an example to slow down the process of reality first, then logic, by using the experience of opening a door.
If you come to a door that you want to open you look at the door to see what it’s like. You look at its handle. It’s hinges, or slide rails. You might look at the floor and see if there are markings there from its opening. Just from this information, you could extrapolate using logic to arrive at a plan for how to open the door. If there are hinges, a handle, and dark marks on the floor on my side, logic would say I need to pull this door towards me to open it. I would then be able to test that out, and see if my logic still holds true in my lived experience of opening the door.
By beginning with reality as it is, logic is then the conceptual capacity that allows us to translate that information into action in the world. And our action in the world then provides a feedback loop. It could have been that my original observation of the reality of the door was wrong in some way. Maybe the door had just been re-hung to open the other way but the floor marks remained. The action of opening the door, and the feedback obtained, then allows me to update my understanding of the reality of this door.
Notice how reality comes first, and conceptual logic comes second.
Notice too that if I’d brought analysis to this experience of the door that I, and as many others as we liked, could have stood around commenting on the colour of the door and whether we thought it was the best shade of brown. We could have measured the length of the floor markings to describe that to another and ask their opinion of whether they were too long or too short. We could have critiqued the way the screws had been applied to the door frame and what the best method is for getting the screws completely flat.
But would any of this support our ability to open the door?
Let’s look deeper then at…
Why does this distinction between analysis and logic matter?Because most people, most of the time, are walking around sharing opinions and ideas, and then critiquing and analysing others’ opinions and ideas by judging them and comparing them to their own. Making decisions from this about whether mine or theirs is right. We then feel happy because someone thinks the same as me, or unhappy because they’re saying something different.
This is how wars on all scales begin.
Nowhere in that is there a check of “what do I know for sure, for myself?”. Nowhere in that is there a coming close to reality, to see it for how it is, and then allowing logic to naturally extrapolate from that into action. In fact, when we do come into close contact with what we call reality, we discover that it’s not very real.
It’s always changing. There are always multiple perspectives on the same situation. And then those perspectives keep changing. And the situation keeps changing. So that very soon we realise, what I mentioned before, that there is nowhere secure to hang your hat.
It’s at this point that the analysing mind feels terrified. What?! There’s no right answer? There’s no clear, definable equation to neatly tie life up with a linear bow of cause and effect?
But for the person in whom the courage of the heart outweighs the terror of the mind, there will be a continuation of that inquiry… “If I can’t know any of that for sure, what do I know for sure? For myself? What is real if it’s not this world that we’ve been calling reality? What is reliable?”
This line of questioning then brings you right into contact with the only reliable, permanent, 100% True reality there is. A reality of no objective form. And therefore no colour, or texture, or shape. A reality which the mind dismisses as ‘nothing’. But which in fact is the only reality that — once realised — returns all of experience back to its rightful order:
To see the True reality of life as it is — to then extrapolate that with logic into the implications of what that means about who I am, and who you are — to then test that in your lived day-to-day experience — then, just like with the door, to have feedback from life as it provides opportunities to keep testing and refining what I’ve seen reality to be, and updating the logic that flows from that.
From that place, analysis falls away. What is there to analyse? I have seen reality as it is, I have seen what that means for how I live my life, and now I’m testing, learning, and updating that model as I go.
There is no need for an opinion in this process. You can share one by all means, and I will listen to see if there is some fresh feedback here that I haven’t yet considered. I can test your opinion against what I’ve seen of reality. And if it doesn’t align, I will invite you to look at reality too, and start from there.
With love, Helen
So Sybil Cummin is the friend of a friend. She lives in Colorado, and she has quite a story. “Knock on any door” as people say. She is a very accomplished gymnast, outstanding student, and a recovering perfectionist. She takes herself not-too-seriously. Which is very important because her field is domestic violence and narcissistic abuse. Part of how she opened my eyes was when she focused on how much domestic abuse has risen during COVID, and especially how it has been underreported. It didn’t occur to me that someone who is a victim of abuse cannot call for help if s/he is in lockdown with the abuser. She also works with little ones, who seem to be doing much better than teenagers under the cloud of the virus. We have a wonderful and very moving conversation as we explore I might be a couple drops in the bucket.
Flying… it’s not my favorite. It’s probably the only time I wish I was still drinking… I used to say I “liked to be passed out by takeoff.”
Yesterday, when I was flying, Martin suggested that I spend some time observing my anxiety instead of letting it overtake me. I was thinking this would never be possible for me, but as we were taxiing to the runway, I turned on this Ram Dass meditation recommended to me last week. It was originally recorded in 1994 with ambient accompaniment by Boreta and Superposition. Here’s the link to it on YouTube, Apple, and Spotify. It’s very beautifully put together, and it takes you on a journey of being the awareness of all that is, not too tightly identifying with it.
Let the phenomena of life arise, exist, and then change. Thoughts arise. Memories. Judgments. Plans. See them just like the horns, the traffic, the sensations in your body. They come. They exist. And then they move on.
We don’t attach our eyes to a leaf as it blows by. Why then do we linger in the thoughts of fear, and anxiety? We hear a horn and then don’t attach to it for hours. It arises, exists, and then moves on.
I’ll often grasp an idea of what may happen, and I OBSERVED myself on this plane fighting to let it go.
You can experience fear and anxiety without identifying with it, so long as you notice it, let it exist, and let it pass. Far too often, we don’t. We fall into the hole of “what was” or “what could be.” All fictitious realities created by the mind.
I had an actual mental fight about letting the anxiety, the worry, just exist and then pass.
“BUT WHAT IF SOMETHING DOES HAPPEN…”
I chose to keep listening to this meditation and was mindful to simply see myself as awareness. Moments later, thoughts later, the anxiety was gone without a second thought. (Don’t get me wrong- it still tried to creep back, but it wasn’t nearly as incapacitating as it normally is.)
Flying is kind of an irrational fear. It truly is the safest way to travel. However, we do this for so many different things in our lives.
For example, we do this with people who have hurt us. We KNOW that to let it go is the way through, but we feel vindicated in lingering in the anger.
We do this with our being “correct,” with our model of the world being the “right” model.
We do this with expectations of friends and lovers.
We expect every person to be in the next moment the same as they’ve been in the previous.
When we feel upset, we relive it. A fight with your boss that happened, for example, might be replayed 17 times to every person who will listen.
You had a fight with someone in the grocery store? How many people heard about that? Fight with a spouse? Did you call everyone and replay the who what when why and where? Over and over? Living in a moment that isn’t now? Replaying it in your head?
Your subconscious mind doesn’t understand future tense. It only knows now, and now arises, exists, and then moves on.
The meditation was very useful in helping me with this particular anxiety. I listened to it from pushback through takeoff (lucky me, the 17-minute meditation took me from the gate to 10,000 feet. That’s not always the case flying out of LaGuardia. )
I recommend it! Might help if anxiety is one of the things you struggle with.
You are your thoughts (I agree)
You are not your thoughts (I agree)
How can both of those statements be true within our lives?
I think the answer is; it depends.
It depends on your mindset.
It depends on how you interact with your thoughts.
It depends on how you allow them to affect your life.
Let’s take a look at both of these statements and see how they can show up in our lives to become “us”.
You are your thoughts.
All things created begin with a thought.
How do you know you like one food and don’t like another?
How do you know what is the most important thing in a certain area of your life? (Values)
How do you know you have a certain fear of or not of doing a certain activity?
All of these things begin with a thought. Those thoughts then can go on to become a belief. Those beliefs then go on to become ingrained in us as “what” and “who” we are.
Looking at the work of Deepak Chopra and the Quantum body; he says “Your body exists as pure creative potential, a multilayered process controlled by intelligence.”
”The skin replaces itself once a month, the stomach lining every five days, the liver every six weeks, and the skeleton every three months. To the naked eye these look the same from moment to moment, but they are always in flux. By the end of one year, 98% of the atoms in your body will have been exchanged for new ones.”
Not to go too far into this work but for the sake of this article, I would ask you one question.
How does your body remember what it is supposed to be if it is always changing? If your skin is renewing itself once a month, how do you still have that same scar or freckle?
There is a thought/memory of what makes up “you”.
Our thoughts at the deepest level truly make up who we are. There is great potential in that and something to be talked about at a deeper level later.
You are not your thoughts.
Here is some research on our thoughts:
“It was found that the average person has about 12,000 to 60,000 thoughts per day. Of those thousands of thoughts, 80% were negative, and 95% were exactly the same repetitive thoughts as the day before.”
“According to the research of Dr. Fred Luskin of Stanford University, a human being has approximately 60,000 thoughts per day—and 90% of these are repetitive! 60,000.”
You can see that negativity bias shows up in these studies and that is more reason for us to take control of our thoughts and not allow all of them to become beliefs and form who we are and how we interact with the world around us.
Our central nervous system (to include our brain) is always on the lookout for signs of safety or threat. This system is millions of years old and it is responding to a world that doesn’t exist anymore. We have to be aware of what makes it tick so we can fully understand where our thoughts come from.
Polyvagal theory is an amazing way to look at how our nervous system works and how those signals show up in our lives in ways that are meant to help us but sometimes the signals can get misinterpreted inside and that can lead to dysregulation and problems interacting in our world.
Meditation practice is one way that we can calm our minds, and have a better relationship with our thoughts.
Our thoughts do not have to have control of our lives. We can work so we can control them. One of the ways that you are taught to do that in meditation is to visualize your thoughts as clouds passing in the sky.
Allow them to float by and realize they do not have to stay with you.
Wayne Dyer used to say that when he had a negative thought come into his mind he would simply say, “next” and move on.
Thoughts are going to show up in our lives. We choose what we do with them. They are guests, sometimes invited and sometimes they just show up unannounced (kind of like some relatives).
As we learn to acknowledge our thoughts for what they are we can learn to recognize them and make judgments about if we allow them to stay or just pass on by. If we allow them to stick around, then we are opening ourselves up to them becoming our beliefs or directing us to go in a direction or do something we would not like to.
Remember, we are driving the bus. We are in control of our thoughts and therefore we are in charge of our outcomes.
So yes, we are our thoughts and we are not our thoughts.
We have the choice.
Whether we want to admit it or not – people do AFFECT us. They’re energy can be uplifting or exhausting. We can probably all agree that none of us are perfect [okay, we’ll admit YOU’RE super close! ;-)] but some people ARE easier for you to deal with than others.
Watch AmyKism #106 for a great reminder that when choosing your mates & friends, it’s really important to choose wisely – their presence in YOUR life impacts so much of it.
To remembering that being invited into YOUR life is a privilege.
Hugs,
AmyK
When time flies by and we become older (to be positive –you are as old as you feel and have lively senses) it seems that specific scenes and accompanying words visit our consciousness in a way that could be described as déjà vu. As if an experience had taken place twice.
How many of us experience genuine, spontaneous déjá vu? Sometimes a little scary because you are ‘there’ and then transported back. But at the same time, images become real.
When walking around a village, woodland, or countryside which was visited as a child but long forgotten but remaining deep in the memory, ready and waiting to jump out at us. At that point, exchanges of conversation return and expand, until you are ‘there’ again. The memories really take you back, bringing the experience to ‘now’. The déjà vu experience. taking us back to the past. But we are ‘there’ now. It could be a dream that transported you to the past.
A past dream; especially flying dreams.
Consider the senses; gray matter instantly ‘remembering’ a sight, odour, or sound in an instant, a number of past experiences; different years unify and deliver as one. Faster than an iPhone.
There are descriptions of such experiences in my two ebooks courtesy BizCatalyst 36O°; Volume 1 and Volume 2.
Many childhood experiences stimulated by a similar ‘happening’ and freeing the heart to expand on those memories take you back to when you were a kid.
Next time you witness a real déjà vu, free the heart and re-live the experience. They never depart; hidden deep within gray matter, where just one signal can bring it all back. Just think of the gray matter’s tasks. Signals flying around the rain, synapses connecting this way, and that is where acetylcholine connects nerve endings to assist in such a journey.
The same journey years apart but experiencing now.
A little fantasy and imagination. Déjà vu takes you to the future.
Déjà vu
Gumshoe did some pondering on this quiet Sunday afternoon and he thought of folks who have made “understatements“ that ended up being “overstatements” due to vicissitude of fortune.
Gumshoe thinks of an occasion when he clearly made an off-hand, innocent, careless, and thoughtless understatement that quickly became overstated; e.g., “When is the baby due?” (The female recipient’s reply) “I’M NOT PREGNANT!
Code RED! DEFCON 3! Gumshoe, exit stage LEFT! No way to clean up on aisle 7.
You see dear readers, just how an understatement can result in evolving into an overstatement without malice aforethought.
Gumshoe, who loves American history, remembers an offhand or maybe a flippant understatement of bravado that due to a Confederate sharpshooter’s aim became an unintended overstatement. It was in May of 1864 during the American Civil War (some folks call it the War Between the States) during the battle of Spotsylvania Courthouse (Virginia). One 50-year-old Union Major General by the name of John Sedgwick (also known affectionately by the moniker, “Uncle John”, by his troops was commanding the battle. General “Uncle John” was afoot (meaning not on his general’s horse) and was viewing the active battle front. One of his staff officers cautioned the general that he just might be a wee bit too close to the action.
General “Uncle John” dismissively retorted:
“They could not hit an elephant from this dis . . .”
Simultaneously, a Confederate rifle ball struck below the general’s left eye and killed him instantly. “Uncle John” was gone. The general’s joking remark was punched lined by that Confederate sharpshooter who definitely had the last laugh. Sad but true in the perilous time of war.
Gumshoe opines that the time and place, along with the circumstances, will always determine our understatements to birth an “unintended understatement” that does not result in an “overstatement” with a BANG!
Well, that’s the end of Gumshoe’s ruminations for now dear readers. Always remember to love the ones who love you and even try to love the ones who don’t.
Coram Deo!
PS: Goodnight General “Uncle John” wherever you are.
I am certain that the above title hits home to many, myself included. So often I thought about writing from my own experience, but never found the right moment. However, based on my current marriage that moment has come. I am married to a man that truly cares for my welfare as I do his. We are not perfect on some days, and we have worked out some kinks that for many, early in marriage, would perhaps call it quits. Through this marriage I know what real love is, wanting the best for one another despite the ups and downs, being willing to acknowledge one another’s faults or shortcomings, willing to forgive and say you are sorry.
There are many reasons people get divorced. Abusive behavior, physical assault, or threat, as well as mental stress, or one party wanting more than what they have. More? What does that mean? More money, a fancier home, more travel, etc.,
Based on my own dysfunctional family life growing up, I had no self-esteem. At the tender age of 18, I was too young, too immature, and very naïve about marriage. I fostered that storybook image of being a loving wife, a loving mother, a beloved grandmother, and the thought that being married forever I would grow old with my husband. That beautiful cottage with the white picket fence in my mind’s eye were dreams in my clouded mind. However, this illusion ended up with me living in my car in areas that had barbed wire fences, raising a daughter on my own, while holding down a full-time job and attending a junior college. “Reality” sucks!
Divorce is an event that changes people forever. It will destroy the family and has an oftentimes-irreversible impact on children, regardless of their ages. I am always in awe of the couples who have been married for half a century or more. I have two adult children for which I’ve made sacrifices so that each of them could obtain college degrees. My goal was to give each of them choices in life that I never had. I don’t believe there ever was a perfect parent, but I also know that there are not perfect sons or daughters. I have taken to heart and practiced the saying “when one knows better, they do better”. My walk-in life has not been perfect, and if I could go back in time, I would do things differently. However, there are no “do-overs” in life. If I would have known back then, what I know now, I could have avoided a lot of pain, not only for myself but for others as well. Being a wife and a mother does not come with instructions.
Once I grew in my faith, I realized that there is an instruction book that does exist…it’s called the Bible. I truly owe all that I am today to God. He is my salvation. I have reached out to my son and daughter, but my efforts thus far have met with no avail. This is a cross I carry every single day. My pain is compounded by the sadness of not being able to be that loving grandmother to my beloved grandchildren. Mothers should never be forgotten by their sons or daughters. Grandmothers should never be removed from their grandchildren. It is personally very difficult to feel, and to know, that I have been erased from their lives without any fathomable cause.
Today’s statistics give marriages a fifty-fifty chance of survival. I will say this to anyone contemplating marriage; understand what love really is, “Agape” is a form of unselfish love and commitment, wanting the better for the other person, Always! The advice I would give to those starting out, from my own life experiences is the following:
- Put God first and foremost in the marriage. Believe and trust in HIM!
- Get to know one another well before making the decision to marry
- Realize that the love is a feeling which will fade, but Agape love will not!
- Accept each other’s weaknesses without criticism
- Read and practice…1 Corinthians 13:4-8
- Pray together, be open to life
- Sort out the disagreements and listen to what the other is saying
- The husband should be the spiritual leader of the family
- Be on the same page about finances
- Worship together
The above takes work but can be done if two hearts are willing, eliminating the thoughts of D.I.V.O.R.C.E To quote the late Bishop Fulton J. Sheen’s book, “it takes three to get married”: God, Husband, and Wife.
Becoming a servant leader through God’s HelpI read the “Purpose Driven Life” Do we keep it inside? We are here to help others so we help. What does one learn about not being able to walk, and remembering how your grandma and father had trouble too? Ending up as paraplegics at 70.
Through a process of finding my best foods, I found I didn’t need as much as I thought, and there were triggers that caused me to eat more. Eating more of the wrong things caused pain and arthritis symptoms. Pain doing everything including walking.
I found friends who were doing this too and found hope and support through them. Different blood types have particular foods that are inflammatory for them and not for others. Believing I could find my best foods. I wrote a book for my story and included three other people with their stories. It is so interesting what others do, and you deserve to learn about these stories also. You deserve to have amazing health as you age. Especially if you are always hungry.
You deserve to learn which foods are best for you, and which foods will carry you through past 80. You deserve to learn, how I healed my gums. My dentist noticed and wanted to know how. I helped my 80-year-old friend lose 115 pounds, and she cured her diverticulosis and sleeps better. Up from 5-6 hours to 7–8 hours. She didn’t think this worked.
If you would like to learn more, about how to digest easier, not hurt, and feel light and energetic. You can heal, I healed my whole body, (I have the Lou Gehrig’s gene.) If you are suffering and want to feel fit at any age, let’s talk. www.talkwithkristi.com Or learn step by step https://www.keystobasichealth.com
P.S. I am 68 now and aim to keep walking.
Why do we find ourselves having an unhealthy relationship with disappointment? We do everything we can to avoid feeling it. We work hard to protect our children from it, and we don’t want others feeling it about us, or anything we are part of. Why is it that we avoid this experience? What I’ve learned through my inner work and the inner work of my clients, is that when we were young, many of us were taught to be ‘grateful for what we have’ – especially when we were expressing our dislike about what was in front of us.
This still happens around the dinner table in homes around the world when a child doesn’t want to eat what is on their plate. As parents, we look for any motivation we can find to get them to eat, even shaming them by comparing them to others that don’t have enough. Unfortunately, this encourages the child to bypass their feelings of disappointment. Instead of allowing our children to be disappointed with what’s in front of them and encouraging them to feel their feelings without our judgment, we tell them that they shouldn’t feel that way – they should feel grateful instead. This is a very disruptive and confusing concept to a young person. It teaches them not to trust, honor or express what is happening to them on the inside. It also teaches them that disappointment is not an option. ‘You are not to be disappointed, and if you are, then you are disappointing your caretakers/family/us’. You are compared to others and if they have less, you should not be disappointed with what you have. We are merged into what others want or have and it twists up our ideas of who is responsible for what. We have covered, hidden, and tucked disappointment away as if it doesn’t have a right to be here.
Disappointment is a critical messaging system that we need back online. When disappointment arises, we are recognizing a gap between our expectations and what we are experiencing. If we don’t explore how we created that gap, we can’t change the pattern for ourselves and we end up staying stuck.
If we were taught not to feel/experience/express disappointment, then it may come out through some dysfunctional behaviors. One way it can show up is in feeling frustrated all of the time about those you are depending on. One of my clients was hugely frustrated with the leadership in her organization but was unable to acknowledge it directly. Instead, she complained about those leaders to anyone who would listen while feeling like her disappointment didn’t matter since she never expected it to change. This led to her performance decline and eventual departure from the company.
Another man I worked with had been taught that disappointment must be avoided at all costs. As a result, he said yes to work that he and his team didn’t have the resources to handle. He also worked hard to fix everyone else’s problems so they wouldn’t have to be disappointed which led to more stress on his team. Once he was able to recognize and express his disappointment in direct and neutral ways, his need to fix everyone else’s problems disappeared. He now allows disappointment to give him its message that he is not getting something he wanted or expected. NOW he can uncover any hidden expectations he may have had and bring them out into the open, adjust them, or renegotiate them so they work for him. Instead of avoiding disappointment, he lets it alert him to when he is not getting something he wants or he’s getting something he doesn’t want.
How will you stop avoiding disappointment today?
Jabeen, a Pakistan-born woman watched her mother, who did not know English, struggle to the point of suicide in England. Jabeen’s own knowledge of English was essential to overcoming loneliness when she found herself without friends or family after immigrating to the U.S. English was the difference between failing and flourishing for these two women.
Nature is a wonderful stress reliever – courtesy of Cape Flattery – the Northwest tip of the Continental United States.
Episode SummaryThose who believe in us give their sturdy hand until we can catch up – and we do, so we can help the next one.
Episode NotesHello to you listening in Lohr am Main, Bavaria, Germany! Coming to you from Whidbey Island, Washington this is Stories From Women Who Walk with 60 Seconds for Motivate Your Monday and your host, Diane Wyzga.
Several Christmases ago my brother Paul gave me a copy of his favorite book: The Boy, the Mole, the Fox and the Horse by Charlie Mackesy. It has become my daily habit to select a page from the book to help guide me through my day. Here is one of my favorites:
“Sometimes I think you believe in me more than I do,” said the boy.
“You’ll catch up,” said the horse
You feel it, too, don’t you? That same sense that we rely on another’s sturdy hand until we are ready to see and believe what they see and believe in us. We will catch up. We do catch up. And, then we can offer our sturdy hand to another. Because “Each One Lift One!” is how we roll here!
CTA: “Come for the stories – Stay for the magic!” Speaking of magic, I hope you’ll subscribe, follow, share a 5-star rating and nice review on your social media or podcast channel of choice, bring your friends and rellies, and join us! You will have wonderful company as we continue to walk our lives together.
You’re invited to stop by the website, check out the Services, arrange a Discovery Call, and Opt-In to stay current with Diane and Quarter Moon Story Arts and on LinkedIn.
Stories From Women Who Walk Production Team
Podcaster: Diane F Wyzga & Quarter Moon Story Arts
Music: Mer’s Waltz from Crossing the Waters by Steve Schuch & Night Heron Music
All content and image © 2019 to Present: for credit & attribution Quarter Moon Story Arts
What do the Japanese know that we haven’t quite mastered yet?Shikita ga nai. Accept and let go.
Some things simply aren’t within our control.
Accept what you cannot change and move on.
It sounds like the Japanese have their own version of the Serenity Prayer which, as I looked it up, had an older and even more powerful version than the one I normally have seen:
Father, give us courage to change what must be altered,serenity to accept what cannot be helped,and the insight to know the one from the other.
As I was working on this piece in early January, my telephone went off with an evacuation alert for the neighboring areas where wildfires previously raged on the mountain. With no vegetation on the hillsides and 10” rain in the forecast, mudslides were to be expected. Some things simply aren’t within our control. All people can do is get out of the way.
Our daughter resided in our guest room – involuntarily. She had hoped to be back in her own home after spending the holidays with us, but she was brought down by Covid. Some things simply aren’t within our control.
I washed my hands frequently and left her mostly alone. After cleaning up when her breakfast came up the same way it came down, I served her boiled water. Then she kept hot broth and dry crackers down. I knew what to be prepared for as my test now also showed positive.
We rolled with it, hoping for the best. Because nothing got better by panicking.
These are all external circumstances.
Then there are the other “things” we can’t change. Like other people. I saw a post earlier:
You can’t change people, but you can change people.
How timely for this piece.
Isn’t that the ultimate “Accept – and let go”?
Group loyalty is a big thing in the Japanese culture – they don’t just throw away family and friends because they can’t change them to their like – or to their liking. Somehow, I don’t think letting go of people is what the Japanese had in mind with this expression.
This Greater Good post shows other ways: “Accepting people does not itself mean agreeing with them, liking them, or downplaying their impact on you. You can still take appropriate actions. You’re simply accepting the reality of the other person. You may not like it, you may not prefer it, you may feel sad or angry about it, but, at a deeper level, you are at peace with it. That alone is a blessing.”
Our letting go could be of the investment in outcomes. No, we can’t change people, but we can change our expectations for and how we respond to their behaviors.
I pray for insight for when that should be my response and then the courage to change me.
Where have you accepted and let go?
Does it still take up space in your mind?
I love to be immersed in the world of imagination
I hardly could evaluate matters in and around me exist with its inherent revelation
Whether I may give recognition to it or nor
It will inevitably evolve with its inherent motion to explore
If they appear in my dream
I feel excited to acknowledge their existing realm
Sometimes I feel utterly flummoxed
How dreams align with my in-built configuration of imagination to sought
Triggering me to navigate with my aspiration
Where my convenience can only uphold my jubilation
I hardly could envisage the vicinity I dwell
Where matters in and around me script my destiny and marvel!
Since inception, we all are moving with a motion which is spiral
Sometimes we may be caught in its upward trend
Sometimes in a downward trend
But we are forced to be caught into such a vortex of unrestrained train
Where motion alone is driving us
Our physical as well chemical entity largely guided by their eternal complexity in chorus
Where mind having hardly any part to promote its precinct
Our mind does evolve by the electrical and chemical impulses with an intriguing thrust
The ingredients composed of our brain is amazing
But how can we ignore the gravity of heart
Which ensures nutrients to all organs along with brain to explore with an exquisite art?
Still, I dare to dream
My subconscious mind construes an intriguing realm
I am fascinated to embark on it
It actually works as a catalyst for me to thrive in candid!
An unwritten rule for nonprofit board membership is that it is best to “go along to get along.” But sometimes a nonprofit director’s “no” vote to an action that has had inadequate discussion can allow him/h to avoid tax penalties that have been levied on other board members for lack of due care.
Stanford University research results indicate that groups with a lone minority dissenter outperform other groups where all members agree. In addition, these groups…”are more successful than (groups) in which all members disagree and fall prey to escalated emotional, difficult-to resolve (group) brawls “ *
The key to success, according to these data, is to,” … have a devil’s advocate (DA) on the nonprofit board. … This is a person or a small board minority that “has the sensitivity to see the differences, perceives them as conflict, and then communicates about the differences in non-confrontational ways.” **
At least one board member with, “high emotional intelligence is needed to play the devil’s advocate role.” *** Other desirable characteristics of a DA are:
- A person(s) with an emotional attachment to the mission generated from personal experience, e.g., a parent whose child has early onset diabetes and has DA attributes described above.
- A person(s) who can be involved with board conflict and not be personally overwhelmed by it.
- A person(s) who does not owe allegiance to friends, family or colleagues also serving on he board.
- A person(s) who has acted as a change agent with other for-profit or nonprofit boards.
- A person(s) with sufficient time to positively drive change.
Can/Should Nonprofits Seek Board Candidates Who Might Become DAs?On the surface, seeking such person might be a waste of time. Most nonprofits seek board members whom they can acculturate to the board norms, not those who might promote board disruptions or conflicts.
Most of the characteristics described above are hard to assess because they are qualitative in character and require the nominations committee to have some unusual sophistication in the interviewing process. For example, the person needs to be visionary to see beyond the current “box” in which the organization finds itself, a difficult trait to perceive in an interview or from records. He/s also needs some modicum of culture intelligence (CQ) to understand the strengths and limitations being addressed for change. It may be that the nonprofit’s culture is strong, but it faces significant headwinds to which the culture is oblivious. Example: Many nonprofit counseling agencies ignored the increased used of prescription medicines that significantly impacted their client counts.
What Can A DA Contribute To A Nonprofit?* Help develop an enhanced vision that allows the organization to avoid the impact of disruptions by technology for social changes. * Help reduce the conflict that will inevitably take place between legacy minded board members and those who want organization modification or reform. * Help set the tone for change. * Celebrate the “health and welfare” of what has been accomplished in the past. * Demonstrate the importance of independent thinking and how it may impact the future of the organization. * Help interest board candidates and potential senior managers to join the nonprofit.
While the need for a nonprofit board DA will be situational, every board needs to occasionally ask itself if a new one will add to its productivity. If the answer is “yes,” then the challenging task is seeking one. Often an independent thinking DA can have productive visions that an acculturated majority on the board needs to consider. In these cases, a DA can be a significant asset.
https://www.gsb.stanford.edu/insights/do-you-have-contrarian-your-team
Ibid.
** Ibid
Once upon a time, a college student took an elective with her friend thinking it would be fun to be classmates. They took a few other courses together, too. While one of them graduated a year before the other, both soon began their careers. One moved home after graduation and began teaching; the other moved to Manhattan and began a career in retail.
Which of those young ladies was I? I was the one who took that elective course with a friend and went into education.
It wasn’t easy; I had to stay an extra semester at college to complete the student teaching practicum and obtain a dual certification as a teacher of the handicapped (the term used at the time) and an elementary school teacher.
In the three decades since, I have used both certifications and others. I continued my education, qualifying to teach ESL (English as a Second Language) and becoming a school supervisor and a school administrator. I went on from my Bachelor of Arts to a Master’s degree and then to a Doctor of Education.
Flashback to my childhood. I was not the little girl who played school with dolls or friends. I was the middle child between two brothers, the only girl. There were no fun summers spent in the Catskills or the Borscht Belt, swimming at the lake or forming lifelong friendships at sleepaway camp.
So, what was it that, over time, led me to Hadassah, of which I have been an active and engaged member for ten years, most recently as a member of the new Hadassah Educators Council?
I was brought up in a Jewish home, the daughter of two first-generation American citizens. Both my maternal and paternal grandparents immigrated to the United States around 1900. They left Riga, Latvia, and Slutsk, Belarus, for a safer life, away from the pogroms.
Over the past few years, I have heard more about my grandmothers. One learned to drive and the photo of her behind the wheel always brings a smile to my face. She’s young and driving, two sides of her I never experienced.
Photo of the author with her grandmother’s high school diploma courtesy of the author.My other grandmother’s life was short and sad. She saw one of her sisters shot before they were able to leave their homeland. She suffered post-partum depression and passed away as a young mother, leaving behind a husband and three children, one being my mom.
What did these women have in common? They both came to America and they both went to school here. In the past six months, I have been given my grandmother’s high school diploma. It is now framed and hangs in my house. When she received it, she was single and living with her parents in Iowa. She would later get married, have and raise two children, work in a grocery store, move to the Bronx, and become a community volunteer.
My maternal grandmother went to school, too. How do I know? I found her classwork, handwritten notes that show her practicing, again and again, how to write words in English. These notes represent her student side as she studied and practiced a new language. She would marry, live in Massachusetts, and have three children. One served in the US forces under General Patton, one became a lawyer, and one became a lab technician and, eventually, my mother.
These families brought with them a commitment to their faith. Of my two male grandparents, I knew one for over 20 years before he passed away. The other is my namesake. One served as a gabbai, reading the Torah at his shul. The other supported his three children and gave them a Jewish upbringing with the help of his extended family.
This background is what led me to become an ESL teacher. In a sense, I followed the pathway of Henrietta Szold, founder of Hadassah. I have taught everyone, from kindergarten children to adult learners. Some of these people have humbled me by what they have shared and how they have grown over time in our class. While their life experiences differ from mine, we have something in common. We smile, enjoy exchanging insights, and are excited by learning from and with each other. There is a respect for cultural exchanges.
It is this background of strong women supported by their immediate and extended families and their friends, this commitment to new experiences and learning, that I bring with me each day. Yet, there have been challenges, too.
When I was too young to understand what it was called, I was the target of antisemitism. It occurred in what should have been a safe place, a Girl Scout meeting. Today, I know the vocabulary of antisemitism and what is considered a safe place. As an elementary school girl, 50 years ago, I did not. I knew that it didn’t feel good when I heard snickers when I shared information about Chanukah during a troop meeting. When I told my mom what happened, I knew from the look on her face that such behavior wasn’t nice.
A few years ago, I felt those pangs again, this time, when I was reprimanded by my boss for missing a meeting after taking a personal day to observe Passover, even though the time off had been approved. I would go on to seek legal advice, and to lose that job. I did not lose my faith, however. I remained Jewish. I remained an educator.
Today, I have two children, both in their twenties. While they make different choices in their Judaism, they show respect for each other, for me, for their friends, and their sole surviving grandparent, a grandma, my mother. At almost 92 years young, she is our Jewish glue. She commuted to college and went on to become active in a Conservative synagogue. She who worked countless bazaars, organized social events and was recognized along with my dad as “Couple of the Year.” She went up to the bimah and had an aliyah during Rosh Hashanah while my daughter and I looked on with smiles and hugs along with a few tears.
This is my journey, an adventure that continues through formal instruction with students and informally through community volunteering and special projects. With a nod towards the intertwining of the arts and Judaism, and with the support of a local community group, I recently chaired the creation of a public art installation, a nine-foot wooden chanukiah (a nine-branched candelabrum used on Chanukah). This past December 2022, the hamlet of Parksville, NY, was the site for this event.
During an interview, I was asked if it was a successful project. Unequivocally, yes, because it stood for all of Chanukah, it was set up in a place where people of various faiths and cultures gathered, and it was unscathed by antisemitic vandalism. It was my fear of such damage that gnawed at me during the design, fabrication, and erection phases of this community grant-funded project. Yet, in the words of a local rabbi, I had done a mitzvah. I was educating people, sharing with others, and doing so respectfully.
Now, the chanukiah is in a storage facility. There it rests, safely. We already have plans for next year’s event that include some weatherproofing and a permanent sign, to be erected at a height low enough to be wheelchair accessible. This sign will be a marker for each season, for each visitor to be able to learn about the history of the community. This sign is a sign of hope for the future of the hamlet, the learning of future generations.
It is that heartfelt support, that respect for diversity, that sunrise each day, that spans the years. From the support my grandparents received from family during uncertain times to the support Hadassah members give through volunteering, through advocacy, through donations, and through their commitment to the health and welfare of the people of Israel – it is through all these things that breakthroughs are happening every day. That is the spirit I bring to being an educator.
This article originally appeared in The Times of Israel and is featured here with the author’s permission.
With Tyre Nichols’s recent murder by the police in Memphis, I think it’s painfully clear that policing in America is yet another public health crisis. Once again, we’re sadly missing the point of its root cause and that’s why it continues. Too often, police brutality is considered a race issue but when 5 black police officers beat a black man to death, it’s not about race. It’s about power.
Why do people seek power? I believe it’s a compensatory behavior attempting to ease the deep emotional pain of not feeling valued. Digging in further,
Value = Love
and love is a basic human need just like food and water.
How many public health issues can be improved or solved if the Power Differential is addressed? Marginalized communities don’t have the power. We can provide resources and support (e.g., urban markets in food deserts) but without a fundamental change in beliefs and values, the differential won’t change long term. Those in power also need their absent emotional needs addressed and help in changing their belief systems and worldviews. When they feel valued [emotionally], they’ll be more willing to relinquish power. This is how Daryl Davis has gotten so many KKK members to quit.
We know people in power will do anything and everything to keep it. It’s how they manage their emotional pain. This is clearly evident with the latest gerrymandering and other voter suppression actions so many states have implemented since 2020. Yet another public health crisis.
Obviously, there are countless other public health issues that most often focus on physical health such as obesity, diabetes, heart disease, and homelessness not to mention major issues such as loneliness, isolation, depression, addiction, etc.
But given Tyre’s murder last week by public servants, and the current “corrective” actions discussed focusing on training and behaviors (a.k.a. symptoms), I don’t expect anything to change going forward. (Just like how the War on Drugs has failed for 100 years.)
If the root problem is not addressed, the symptoms (e.g., murders by police) will continue. The root problem is poor emotional health and emotional pain and this is very different than mental health and emotional intelligence. A person’s behaviors are the symptoms of their pain.
Note: I define Emotional Health as a person’s ability to give and receive love, connection, and belonging.
How do we react when things go wrong? Miseries sometimes do not come alone, and you fail the skies raining miseries on us?
Let us imagine this scenario. Mr. X lost his job, his house burnt, he fell sick and needed to buy medicines that he couldn’t afford. Normally, like most materials under pressure do, Mr. X weakens. Is it possible to show exceptional behavior under these testing and destructive conditions for Mr. X to expand his possibilities rather than shrink them?
Before you rush to say no I tell you it is possible.
Scientists have made materials that behave differently from normal. These materials expand under pressure and turn the destructive energy into a useful one.
Are exceptional leaders the same? They lead and stretch possibilities when most people see them shrinking.
How to Stretch Possibilities?One great way of stretching possibilities is to use opposite thinking. Opposite thinking is similar to materials that expand under pressure by convert negative thoughts to positive ones.
Opposite thinking is a technique that will help you contest your assumptions and beliefs to generate unfamiliar ideas. See the video below to learn more about this technique.
Opposite materials tell us to think of opposite ideas as they might provide novel ideas. They are mind-stretchers.
Mr. X’s wooden house caught fire. The opposite thinking is to have a wooden house that does not burn. He challenges the commonly accepted assumption that wooden houses burn easily.
Now, stretching the mind becomes possible with more questions such as
- How to make wood fire-resistant?
- Is it possible to change the structure of wood so that it become more resistant to fire?
- Would adding a charring material to wood stop it from burning?
You see the idea is to challenge familiar behaviors, beliefs and assumptions by thinking of their opposites.
Great leaders are mind-stretchers during difficult times. Most people fall under pressure, but great leaders thrive under them to spring back with more possibilities.
These leaders like all successful people know that success is not one shot in the arm. They can repeat their successes under the most challenging conditions.
Milka Zadok Dubai commented on one of my recent posts. Part of her comment reads;
“I can’t agree with you more, doing the opposite. Although overconfidence is one of the most powerful cognitive biases, there are some strategies that can be used to reduce it. You may be the best but make a conscious decision to ask for people’s opinions and be open enough to ultra your ego to see reasoning in someone’s ideas outside yours”
Be an opposite thinker.
The instigator’s tactics can include anything from subtle manipulation to outright threats and theft. This can include limiting access or hiding money or assets from the victim.
Financial abuse often goes hand in hand with other forms of abuse such as emotional and physical abuse. Signs of abuse are not always obvious to those outside the relationship, and there are also situations where the victim is unaware that they are being financially manipulated.
While the majority of victims are women, men are also victims of financial abuse. In fact, one in five women and one in seven men have experienced financial abuse. It crosses all socio-economic groups, races, and education levels. Financial abuse occurs in 99% of domestic violence cases. In addition, the Covid-19 pandemic greatly increased the risk factors for domestic violence and, along with it, the incidence of financial abuse. Rates of reported domestic violence cases rose in the USA by 8%.
It has been shown that the most dangerous time for a woman in an abusive relationship is when she decides to leave. Often this is the time that financial abuse peaks in a relationship in an effort for the abuser to retain control of the victim and their situation, although financial abuse can occur throughout the relationship as well.
Financial abuse is a very effective way of keeping an individual in a relationship or situation. Without funds, the victim has limited means to move on from the relationship. This may include an inability to pay for housing, food, and childcare outside of the current relationship with the abuser. Lack of access to funds can also limit the ability of a victim to maintain these basic life needs long enough to establish stability, causing them to return to the abusive relationship.
Types of Financial AbuseCoerced Debt
Coercing a partner to reluctantly enter into a credit agreement, for example, to purchase a new, fancier car than they would like is a form of financial abuse. The abuser may enter into credit agreements themselves and expect the victim to shoulder the financial burden of that debt either partially or completely.
Abusers may also use their victim’s social security numbers and other identification to open credit cards, running up huge debts in their victim’s name. In fact, stealing someone’s identity, assets or inheritance are all forms of financial abuse.
Financial Exploitation
Often financial abuse begins very subtly with a partner offering to take care of the finances for the relationship. Gradually their control of the finances can become absolute, resulting in the abuser providing an ‘allowance’ for the victim or requiring them to account for every penny spent, even when the victim has earned the money themselves. The victim may find that the bank accounts have been changed or that they no longer have access to their accounts. Investments may have been made without their consent or inclusion in decision making.
Withholding funds for necessities such as children’s basic needs and other household basics is another way financial abusers retain control of their victims. Often, during divorce proceedings a partner may hide or fail to disclose assets causing financial hardship for the victim as they try to establish a new home with their children.
Career/Workplace sabotage
Abusers may prevent victims from working outside the home, limit their access to workplace training, or sabotage their chance of career progression via intimidation, threats or subtle manipulation. Victims could also be forced to work for free in a family business with no chance of earning for themselves or creating a career path of their choosing. Limiting the career and work opportunities of the victim also limits their power within the relationship. Abusers may resort to physical violence to prevent their victim from performing well at meetings or in job interviews. Victims may feel their only alternative is to quit their job, leaving them even more vulnerable to abuse.
Senior Financial Abuse
The elderly are particularly susceptible to financial abuse. This can come at the hands of seemingly well meaning caregivers, or even the victim’s own children. It can be difficult to detect elder abuse as the individual may not be aware that their assets are being stolen. Abusers may coerce or threaten their victim into signing Power of Attorney documents, giving financial power to the abuser to access bank accounts and assets.
There are cases of adult children or caregivers stealing government benefits, leaving their victim with not enough money to provide for their basic needs such as food and medicine. Families should keep an eye out for signs of elder financial abuse such as fearfulness of an individual, lack of funds to pay bills, unexplained withdrawal from accounts, or missing personal items.
The Impact of Financial AbuseFinancial abuse can prevent a victim from obtaining safe housing for themselves and their children. With the threat of homelessness looming, many victims may choose to return to their abusers. It may take several tries before they are able to make a break from the situation safely. Even then, they can face years of hardship as they work towards rebuilding their financial lives. Victims may need to overcome inconsistent work histories, bad credit, and legal problems over several years.
What to do if you’re being financially abused
Leaving an abusive relationship is the most dangerous time for the victim. Creating a plan of action well in advance can help mitigate some of the safety hurdles.
An escape plan will have several parts. First, find a trusted friend or family member who you can turn to. Even without the support of a person close to you there are other alternatives such as an emergency domestic violence shelter (U.S. National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233).
If you can save any money in the form of cash, do so. Keep it in a safe place that your abuser will be unlikely to find. If you’re still working, open a new bank account and have your pay deposited into the new account; but leave this step until you are ready to leave the relationship.
Gather all the documents you can that relate to your finances and your identity. These should include medical insurance cards, birth certificates, passports, bank statements, and loan documents. Don’t forget to include your children’s identification and social security cards as well.
What to do once you have left the relationship
Find financial education resources to help you understand where you stand financially. A lawyer can help you obtain court orders that provide access to funds to live on (and to pay the lawyer, especially in the event of a divorce). You will also want to consult with a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst to help understand where any funds are being held and to gain access to what is rightfully yours.
A credit counselor can assist with helping you to understand your financial options and, when appropriate help you set up a Debt Management Plan to help pay off your debts in an affordable way. They can also provide budgeting information and other helpful resources.
There are many reputable sources of free personal finance information online. Read all that you can to increase your confidence with managing your money safely.
Monitor your credit score regularly and examine your credit report at least once a year to ensure that there are no accounts opened in your name that you are unaware of. You can get a free copy of your credit report each year from annualcreditreport.com. Report any errors to the three credit bureaus. You can put a freeze on your credit report to prevent any new accounts being opened without your consent.
It may take several years to gain financial stability; however, the journey will be worth it.
Laying on a blanket in the grass
In awe gazing up at the stars
Saying to myself: “is this Venus
I see; or could it possibly be Mars?”
I see the Big Dipper
And even BIG Bear _ Gazing
Longer, I see a cross in the sky
Tell me: “What do you see there?”
Go ahead – Rename them if you wish
Use your imagination – Give it a try
Millions of these tiny luminous lights
Flickering as they light up the sky
Astrologists forever trying to teach- About
Stars and galaxies beyond reach – As
I dream of the climb up high upon a ladder
Touching one magical star; made of matter
Beethoven: “Music is the mediator between the spiritual and the sensual life.” For those of you who don’t know that Rock n Roll music was actually transformed from blues to Rock by African Americans, like Chuck Berry, Bo Diddley, and Sister Rosetta Tharpe? You just have to watch this Episode! Meet my Guest: Tony Michaelides (TEDx Speaker, Member of “Project Transition USA” on LinkedIn, Supporting Transitioning Military @vets, Founder & CEO Music Industry Executive, Radio & TV Host) Join us as he speaks on ROCK n ROLL and especially how the influence of the association with Legendary David Bowie (Who sold 100 million records sold worldwide, and rightfully was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 1996), molded his life.
Have you ever noticed how difficult it is to receive a compliment, without deflecting, defusing, or refusing it?Because genuine compliments, given with a genuine intent, very often shine a light on the deeply intimate and vulnerable parts of ourselves, that we often keep hidden lest we be seen as our whole, true selves, which by the very definition of being human, have almost certainly been judged, wounded or rejected.
So, paradoxically considering how much we all need to be accepted and loved, this means that we hide huge parts of who we really are, with the false belief that we will be more loved and more accepted, when it just means we are less understood and as a result, less loved.
And this can often be seen in the difficulty that so many of us face in simply accepting a genuine compliment – because we have hidden or forgotten about our beautiful parts, because we put them away lest they get broken.
We talk about being grateful yet we seem to think that is a one-way street, it is not – we can and should receive as well as give gratitude, otherwise, how can we ever learn to see the good in ourselves from another’s perspective?
We talk about being humble yet we seem to think this has to entail forgoing any recognition of our strengths, or kindness, or compassion – it does not, it simply means we receive it as it is given, it does not need to be analysed, justified or exaggerated.
So, in fact, learning to hear and then embrace compliments are at the very essence of being grateful and humble, because not only have you inspired another to want to give you that compliment, you have accepted it with grace and therefore shown the other person that their words matter and that they have been heard.
It’s ok to receive and embrace a compliment, in fact, it’s a sure sign that you are allowing yourself to be fully seen and that is how we can all learn to be loved and indeed to love others.
Transformation happens in the light of awareness.
You are that light.
Shining, eternal, infinite. Light.
Losing sight of yourself in your creative process
You forget.
It seems that to transform is impossible.
Clouding yourself with yourself.
Till you remember,
And remember.
And light is seen as who you are.
Shining, eternal, infinite awareness.
The light.
Transformation inevitable.
Trevor Joe Lennon interviews Felix Cavaliere, The King of Blue-Eyed Soul. His songs helped define a generation. from JoeyDee and the Starlighters The Beatles and working Robert Kennedy’s campaign in 68′ People Got To be Free! He is a member of…
- The Rock N Roll Hall of Fame
- Musicians Hall of Fame
- Grammy Hall of Fame
- Songwriters Hall of Fame
- Vocal Group Hall of Fame
- Hit Parader Hall of Fame
- Hammond Hall of Fame
The Rascals had 18 Top 40 Hits, 5 Top 10 Hits, and 3 No. 1 Mega Hits including “Groovin’,” “Good Lovin’,” “Beautiful Morning,” “How Can I Be Sure,” and “People Got To Be Free.”
Trevor Joe Lennon · Felix Cavaliere The Rascals Trevor Joe Lennon
I recently had a poem published in a mag for mental awareness. It is geared toward people with disabilities to learn how to write poetry as a tool for therapy. Working through their depression and anxiety.
I personally suffer from depression and sometimes it’s hard to even get out of bed. I lack the ambition to do anything. Withdrawn into my own little space within my head.
I have been using poetry as a tool for many years now. My earliest poems have a lot of roller-coaster mood swings. From the low desperation of suicidal thoughts to the high-on-life phase of bipolar.
I remember when I was first diagnosed with bipolar depression. It was the lowest time in my life. Never having been diagnosed until the age of twenty-two. Couldn’t understand Why Me? My family did not understand it either. Placing the blame on themselves and feeling shame that their daughter was crazy. Or was she?
The point is many people suffer from depression and anxiety. Still very much misunderstood and often undiagnosed. In my family, most of our siblings have depression and anxiety.
I had the opportunity to be featured on their webpage. I wrote a whole article about feelings of and emotions. And I realized that others suffering could be helped to feel better with my poetry. It was meant to be read not hidden under the bed. I caught myself feeling shame. That people would know. I’d be opening up that part of my world for all to see. I felt vulnerable. And I questioned why I had submitted it there. I guess I thought it was going to be a place I could identify with others and understand myself better.
Some of my poems would fit like a glove plus I’d learn about the struggles of others. Even in today’s society depression is much understood. It would be nice if someone could wear my shoes.
I hope with this article that others will be helped and understood. That people would stop placing labels and get to the core of the problem. I don’t use disability as an excuse. I embrace it and treat it like any other disease. I am no longer a victim but a survivor. It’s a matter of perspective to stay positive and hard work.
Today I am stable and enjoying each day as if it’s my last. One day at a time. So I remain humble and count my blessings every day. My challenge for readers is to try to educate themselves about depression. Don’t look down on or judge because you never know it could be you next time.
Stop labeling depression as crazy. I’m no different than you. I get by with a little help from my friends.
In the meanwhile pick up that paper and pen and express yourself.
Happy penning © Eva Marie Ann Cagley
The Gold to which I refer within the content of this article is not the type found as shiny nuggets panned from streams; nor is it the kind that is bound in ore at great depths within the earth. To mine this nature of Gold, drilling rigs, dynamite, and mammoth mining trucks are not required. The Gold of which I write is Spiritual Gold, and It is closer than your breath. It is the MOST precious non-thing, never found via the senses.
The following information will be useful to help us set up our mining operation. In spiritual circles, our shared Oneness is often analogously referred to as Gold. We, as humans of various shapes, sizes, and colours, are likened to articles of golden jewelry such as rings, bracelets, or necklaces. Through this analogy, we understand that at the core, all of the articles of jewelry are, in essence, gold. This principle also applies to humankind; for at the Core, all of us are fashioned from, and known by Awareness. In spiritual terms, we refer to It as God; in scientific terms, we refer to It as the Unified Field; and we informally refer to It as “I Am.”
To understand our essential nature more deeply, it’s important that we realize that Awareness knows Itself, through Itself. It is knowingly self-aware of Its own nature. Its essential nature is creative. Out of the One Spiritual Gold, all forms that are known, including the world and our body-minds, are made. Logically, therefore, each and every one of “us” must intrinsically possess a shining nugget of Goldness within. It could be no other way. It is this one-and-only Gold that I devote the contents of this article.
For reasons which may only be surmised, the majority of modern cultures have attempted to hide the realization of our Goldness from humankind. To whatever degree this may be so, the good news is that our nugget of Gold is the one non-thing that can never be stripped from us–it is our Golden birthright. For periods of time, we may be confused about our essential nature; but we can never actually be other than That which we are.
To mine our spiritual Gold within, it’s imperative that we realize that no amount of data collecting or soil sampling about our essential nature (books, religious services, spiritual retreats, online presentations) can ever replace leaning into our shovels and digging into the very nature of our Being. Daily meditation is the tool that we use to spiritually mine (recognize) our nugget of gold within. When we shovel away the overburden (that which is not our essential nature; i.e., name, form, title, status, nationality, race, etc), the nugget of gold is directly revealed.
To recognize the nugget of gold, we must turn our attention within and merge with IT.
One of the greatest consequences of knowingly mining our Gold (God) within us, is that the world and everyone benefits from this recognition.
When we raise God from the depths of our Being to the surface of our daily interactions, everyone’s life is enriched. The world, and our experience of it, is quite literally transformed.
Selfishness is displaced by Godly selflessness. Base human traits are displaced by the genuine love of the Creator. Due to our rich discovery, we may now see and appreciate the Gold that is shining through and from everyone and everything. Perhaps it’s time to consider setting up your own Gold mining camp, Here and Now.
Dare to dream (and care for one another).
With heartfelt regards,
Art
Drink in this image as the reflection of the light on the water reminds us that the extraordinary can be found in the ordinary.
Bedford river at sunrise ~ Kate GriffithsOver the last couple of weeks I have been diving into a course in miracles, a book that was published anonymously and whose author was not revealed until after her death at her request. She was not interested in fame which she realised is illusory. Her main focus was to help humanity wake up from the illusion that life presents. She claimed that the book was channelled through by Jesus. And it is incredibly enlightening in terms of what it reveals. And I continue to dip into Richard Rohr’s Divine-inspired work to gain insights.
My sense is that at this time I am being asked to sit in prayer or meditation more frequently to determine what is next for me. I have felt the need to let go of a great deal of what I have been doing in my business to allow space to see what wants to emerge. At times this level of not knowing feels terrifying. And yet in other ways it is revealing more of the path. Let me share an example with you.
I have been aware of a shift in my business both in terms of what I have an appetite to offer and what’s happening within my client base. My old self would have probably struggled with all this uncertainty and change and placed all sorts of interpretations on why this was happening. Instead what I am noticing is that as I follow my heart, other revenue-generating options are showing up.
I have had some new client referrals come in which is lovely and potentially a couple of new strands of work that I am exploring. And a former client said no to one offer and asked me if I would be willing to do some one to one work with them.
How is that happening?The whole premise of a course in miracles is that only love is real and anything else you are feeling is unreal. The challenge is that for many this is too hard a concept to grasp because of our learnt behaviour over years and the conditioning that we have experienced. Our survival patterns are such that we are hard-wired to negativity so when things do not go the way we want then we tend to think the worst!
When I was going through the process of what next and continuing with my daily practice including the walking of my dog Benji, I opened myself to love by sitting in my heart and letting the light in. And then undertook aligned action.
One of the steps I tookIt came to me to visit a friend who had been ill for a long time to drop off my version of a ready meal. I hadn’t planned to stay but she asked me to return after my dog walk for a coffee. We spent two hours chatting and connecting. She introduced me to Dutch wafers that are warmed over your coffee which was delicious. At the end of our time together she commented on how much more positive she felt and I left feeling lighter in my being too.
Getting the rhythm of being and doing in balance for yourself is not easy. If you don’t set an intention nothing will happen likewise if you take no action and hope it will all come through meditation. It is a combined effort. The following quotation may help:
We must listen, wait, and pray for our charism and call. Most of us are really only good at one or two things. Meditation should lead to a clarity about who we are and, maybe even more, who we are not.
~Richard rohr
The last part of his quotation reminds me of something a friend said to me recently: I pray that God will slam the door shut if an opportunity is not right for me. It helps to receive guidance on both elements.
I had an amazing experience when I spent 10 minutes doing the following practice offered by Teresa Blythe. If you try it be open to receiving guidance through visions or images; it is unlikely to be a voice from on high. It may also simply be a feeling of deeper peace. I was very lucky and felt that I was administered to by Jesus himself.
Teresa Blythe practice…
- Resolve to be in prayer for at least five minutes. Do not answer the phone or allow yourself to be distracted from your goal.
- Be seated and say to yourself, “Here I am seated, doing nothing. I will do nothing for five minutes” (or longer, depending on the time you set for yourself).
- Begin noticing your own bodily presence—how your body feels next to the chair; how your feet feel against the floor. Relax your body. Notice what you feel inside.
- Now notice the presence of all that is around you. Say to yourself, “Here I am in the presence of the room (garden, chapel, wherever you are).” Be aware of the furniture, walls, and any pets or people in the room. Just be present and silent in your environment. Relax even more.
- Now say to yourself, “Here I am in the presence of God.” Repeat silently to God, “Here I am.” Bask in the presence of the Holy One until your time goal has been reached.
If you do undertake the practice please drop me a line and let me know what came up for you. To deepen it you may wish to start by spritzing a Colour Mirrors essence onto each hand and into your aura.
And if you love the idea of exploring this further email me at kate@wholeselfleadership.com to find out more about my retreat on 5 Feb.
There’s a lot of debate going on about the practicality of switching the world over to electric vehicles. Of course, a lot of the resistance to this is coming from the right, where the vested interest in preserving the status quo mainly lies.
Their basic argument is that the amount of energy burned to find, process, and manufacture the minerals and metals needed to make the batteries and the electric cars themselves is 5 or 6 times more damaging to the environment than sucking oil out of the ground and refining it to make fuel for internal combustion engines.
That would be a good point except for one little thing: The simple fact that while the creation and manufacture of most vehicles, electric or internal combustion, is close to a wash in terms of energy usage, the real damage that combustion engines do is after they have been created, and for years and years over the life of the vehicles.
Of course, taking the argument to the manufacturing of the vehicles themselves does one critical thing for the fossil fuel and automotive industries. It diverts attention from the real issue here.
Seldom do you find any ‘industry’ conversation about why car makers and oil companies are doing virtually nothing to create engines that burn fossil fuels more efficiently or fuels that burn cleaner than they do now.
Because this is the Achilles’ heel of both the automobile manufacturers and the oil producers of the world. And it’s a pretty damn big one at that.
I would venture a wild-ass guess that these companies, all of them, would not be willing to invest even a small percentage of their gargantuan profits into working on these two critical pieces of the energy puzzle.
I’m reasonably certain they have thought about it. And I’m also reasonably certain that there are literally dozens of alternative technologies in both of these industries. But corporate greed being what it is these days, these ideas are being stifled. Why? Because they would, purely and simply, reduce profitability. And that, of course, brings us to the bigger economic issue and a bunch of pretty serious questions about the damage that market capitalism is doing to the world.
Oil companies and vehicle manufacturing companies seem to be getting a free ride here when it’s their technologies and their profound lack of commitment to the human race that are at the root of the environmental crisis the world is experiencing.
A lot of this has to do with the fact that they have pretty much bought off all the politicians required to stifle any serious pressure from governments that would force them into being environmentally responsible.
And why bother when you can keep on making barrels of money, (pardon the pun), by doing absolutely nothing, other than supporting the politicians who are greedy enough to make sure they never have to actually do anything that will affect their own bottom lines? Things like demanding research and development into more efficient engines or new refining processes that create cleaner burning fuels.
This is the world we have created. And right now, it’s quickly approaching totally f__ked. And it’s all because of corporate greed and the failing of the market capitalist system that only rewards things that are growing and kills anything that is not.
England over the last 1000 years and more has experienced some of the most influential language and cultural changes. This most significant language is clearly recognisable to those having been taught Latin. Viewing English and Latin texts side by side, many words have clear Latin origins.
Latin is a language used today as part of church services including hymns. Latin is still a major language in Roman Catholic Churches.
I was taught Latin at school in 1956 and beyond. Making an error could prove painful! In those days, pupils wondered why Latin was important as it was never spoken as a language such as French.
There is a humorous poem reflecting such thoughts. Indeed, when welcoming visitors to Winchester Cathedral’s Kings and Scribes Exhibition, many will have learned Latin and together we recite the following (not too loudly!)
‘Latin is a language,
As dead as dead can be,
It used to kill the Romans,
And now it’s killing me.’
Much gentle laughter, from those who know or not know Latin.
A word announcing a pause for example during stage plays and quite a few years ago, movies, is ‘intermission’. An example of its original use: ‘To pray without ceasing’ – ‘Orate sine intermissione’.
The language of monks in monasteries was Old Latin. ‘Vulgate Latin’.
In contrast to the more strict application of Latin, near Amsterdam’s Leidseplein, is an enormous Romanesque-style structure, complete with pillars, built a few decades ago with a delightfully humorous Latin inscription: ‘Homosapiens non urinat in ventum.’ Enhanced translation: ‘Humans should not urinate in the wind’! Another well-used word is alacrity, meaning briskness, cheerful readiness, originating from Latin: ‘alacer’.
Other much-used words originate from French; Rapport: Harmonious communication. Although not as visible as Latin and Norman French, is Greek.
The original texts of the New Testament were in Old Greek, translated into Vulgate Latin by St. Jerome circa AD380. He was asked to go to the Holy Land by Pope Damascus to try and locate some of the early scriptures and stayed in a Bethlehem monastery. He also sought the Old Testament (The Torah); naturally in Hebrew. St. Jerome spoke Latin and Greek. He did not speak or read Hebrew. His prime mission was to translate the Greek and Hebrew texts into Vulgate Latin. He learned Hebrew with the help of some Jewish (Hebrew) citizens. He then invested over twenty years translating Hebrew and Greek into one language Vulgate Latin. Remarkable fellow. As it happens, he was the second most prolific writer after St. Augustine, who said if St. Jerome, ‘What Jerome is ignorant, no mortal has ever known.’
Returning to languages!
Paradigm originates from Greek – a change of approach to science or a particular subject. A ‘paradigm shift’ for example. Metaphor.
Britain is an island invaded on a number of occasions, so a few ‘foreign’ languages are evident, but not always recognized.
From 1066 the Norman Invasion and Norman French.
Latin: (Roman occupation circa AD78 to departure in AD 400. Germanic era following departure of Romans.
Anglo-Saxon: Prior to the Norman conquest. ‘Old English’.
Danish occupation. There is little Danish to be found in English. ‘By’ pronounced ‘boo’ – hence Grimsby and Tenby: ‘bee’ phonetically there are a few other words: goodby in English: ‘farewell’ (phonetic) in Danish.
Finally Normandy; William I -the language of ‘Court’ being Norman French.
King Alfred the Great (pictured above) and King William I had the greatest influence on the creation of England.
Winchester being the former capital of Alfred the Great) and former residence of Queen Emma who died in 1052, who was the great aunt of William the Conqueror. Her father was Richard I of Normandy. She was married twice. Firstly King Aethelred and when he passed away, King Cnut. The only Queen to be Queen twice and the only Queen to have a mortuary chest in Winchester Cathedral. Her principal home being Winchester, where her residence still remains. She had two sons; Harthacnut and Edward the Confessor.
Today I had the honor of welcoming a direct descendant of Queen Emma. Over 95% of people have never heard of her. I guided him to the Kings and Scribes Exhibition and showed him details of her history and much to his surprise, her mortuary chest; the only Queen to have a mortuary chest in the Cathedral. He was really very emotional. I was sincerely honored.
Winchester has much to offer in the way of history. I adore the City’s historic significance and close proximity to the most glorious countryside; rivers, hills, moorland, and water meadows.
Many people from around the world, including those visiting via cruise liners.
Certainly worthy of a visit.
I dream of painting and then I paint my DREAM.
~Vincent van Gogh
The older I get the greater I dream
The visions of youth are now dimly seen
How lovely it is though years have flown by
You’ve much to accomplish & things yet to try
Each day’s an adventure & much is in store
Be fully expectant and open the door
In your DREAMS .. may you soar
Dreams contain wishes .. they unwind .. goals are entwined.
Dreams are filled with creativity and WONDERMENT and imagination.
To be fulfilled: they require desire, commitment, persistence, and HARD work.
In the preparedness of SOWING dream seeds there are elements of luck and favor.
All of your life .. DREAM
Is there a fountain for dreams?
As the heart is the well-spring of life
DREAMS are birthed in the human heart
Allow your HEART to connect to your mind
Allow your MIND to connect with your heart
Your mind is like a flowing stream
.. thoughts & IDEAS flowing in ..
.. you need to write them out ..
.. to make room for more ..
In stillness .. awakened
It’s lovely to sit by a stream
.. so as to savor .. so as to dream
.. might the water be whispering?
.. does wonderment help us create?
.. thoughts and IDEAS tend to percolate
.. in time .. with nurture, they proliferate
She dreamed a thousand dreams of those sunlit regions and was consumed with longing for this other and richer self, forgetting—what is so easily forgotten—that even the fairest dreams and the deepest longings do not add an inch to the stature of the human soul.
~Jens Peter Jacobsen, Niels Lyhne
DREAMS are connected to your heart and your level of consciousness.
“Your visions will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside dreams; who looks inside, awakens.” – Carl Jung
“Dreams are ageless. The more you grow as a person, the more your ability to DREAM can grow.” – Amina Alami
Increasing consciousness increases your capacity.Spiritual awakening increases your capacity. The greater your capacity, the greater your DREAMS will be.
DREAMS are seldom realized without struggles, setbacks, disappointments & challenges.
Life has a way of crushing our dreams .. and our souls .. and our hearts .. and our spirits.
But in some are found a deep well-spring .. those who “drink with the root of their heart”
“Know ye not that there is in this world a secret confraternity? There are people who by natural constitution have been given a different nature and disposition than others; that have a larger heart and swifter blood, they wish and DREAM and demand more, have stronger desires and a yearning which is wilder and more ardent than that of the common herd. They are fleet as children over whose birth good fairies have presided; their eyes are opened wider; their senses are more subtle in all their perceptions. The gladness and JOY of life, they drink with the roots of their heart, while others merely grasp them with coarse hands.” – Jen Peter Jacobsen
In all struggles: our mind is like a ship“When all seems to be against you, remember, a ship sometimes has to sail against the current, not with it .. The storm only comes to teach you how to skillfully sail your ship .. You don’t command wind in the direction it blows, but you command a ship in the direction it sails .. Your mind is a ship; it can sail across the universe as long as you don’t allow negative thoughts to sink it.” ― Mashona Dhliwayo
“I want to be in the arena. I want to be BRAVE with my life. And when we make the choice to dare greatly .. to DREAM greatly .. we sign up to get our asses kicked. We can choose courage or we can choose comfort, but we can’t have both. Not at the same time.” – Brene Brown
The power of light…“Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it or giving up on our DREAMS. Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and JOY. It is these experiences that make us the most vulnerable. Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light.” – Brene Brown
Light Source: “In His Light .. we have light” – Psalm 36
“The fruit of the Light consists of goodness, righteousness & truth” – Ephesians 5
Might dreams rest best in gratitude?“Do not only indulge in DREAMS of having what you have not, but reckon up the heap of the blessings you do possess, and then thankfully remember how you would crave for them if they were not yours.” – Marcus Aurelius
Wish upon your own bright star.
Hold close this thought: DREAMS don’t work unless you do.
Follow your DREAMS .. though they seem afar .. seem impossible
“Call nothing thy own except thy soul. Love not what thou art, but only what thou may become.” Dream the Impossible Dream – Man of La Mancha
https://spillwords.com/dream-a-new-dream/
I write while I am in the garden. To write properly about a garden, one should not write while standing outside or just being near it, but in the garden.
It is not easy to have a beautiful garden; it is as difficult as ruling a kingdom. One must resolve to love even the imperfections, otherwise, one is deluded.
The time of the garden is therefore the time of life. It does not push us forward, like the mechanical time that governs our lives today, because a true place always roots us in the present time, here and now. There are no goals to achieve, no objectives to attain, for life has only one end: itself. The same is true for beauty, which constantly flows from the process of living.
To find this life, true life, and this time of nature which is also our true time, that which knows our animal body: this is what pushes us to open the door of a garden and to enter it, each time as if we were going to penetrate a world apart, buried within us.
Nature does not complete its work: it is chaotic. Man feels obliged to finish it, so he plants a garden and builds a wall around it.
The garden, a miniature image of creation, has confirmed that this is the only lasting, deep and fulfilling relationship possible.
One grows a garden so as not to feel alone. More often, it is the garden that cultivates us…..
The garden is a mirror of society and of the relationship with nature; it is at the same time a mythical space, where the collaboration between artist and architect is possible with more imagination and freedom.
In a garden, that which pulsates in the darkness – the dark, invisible force of roots and seeds – wants to surface. The task of the gardener is to care for this darkness and to transform it into light, colour, and form.
People are divided into those who build and those who plant. The builders finish their work and sooner or later are seized by boredom. Those who plant are subject to rain or storms, but the garden will never stop growing.
In building a garden, the form of its architecture must be well related to its function. In ancient times, the construction of each gazebo, each pavilion, each bend in a corridor was designed to meet very specific needs. Both repetition and extravagance must be avoided. The same applies to the art of writing poetry, where all redundancy must be abolished. The branches of knowledge are all, in one way or another, related to each other. The design flaws of a garden are similar to the lexical flaws of literature, since the purpose of the garden is to offer landscapes and that of literature to express ideas. This is why I say that building a small garden is as difficult as composing a poem of only four stanzas.
A garden also has its own identity. However, there are uncertain corners in which it is difficult to give birth to and grow what we want. Plants and flowers are like our plans: some do not grow, others grow when we least expect it.
…Anyone who wants to lead the world should first try to lead a garden…
Hindsight is my worst enemy. As I learn and grow I look back at past choices. I have regrets and they haunt me. Driving home from a hospice visit with Mrs. C. I try to remember- or try to not remember- my last weeks with my own mother. I wonder if those weeks could have been turned into months or even years had we made different decisions or continued treatment.
The questions haunt me: was she able to eat if I had simply tried more textures? Maybe the nurse was wrong. Was she able to take the life-extending medicine had I tried different applications? In hindsight, I see how I might have given her more attention in both quality and quantity. As I see the situation in my mind’s eye- a mind that is over a decade older and richer in both wisdom and experience- I see how I would tend to her both physically and emotionally if I had it to do now. I have learned more about the needs of the dying and the experiences of the dying and their caregivers. In hindsight, I see how I failed my mother.
In this moment I am glad to be for her the daughter who does not visit her.
I stand at the bedside of Mrs. C and she opens her eyes and smiles in surprise. Alzheimer’s disease prevents her from recognizing me for who I am, but the presence of whomever she believes me to be makes her happy. She grabs my hand and holds it to her chest. I wipe away her tears and she whispers two of the only three words she has ever said to me: “thank you.” I ask her if she is thirsty and get no response, yet she swallows the juice through the straw from the glass I hold for nearly a minute. She nods when I ask her if she likes the music I am playing. I remind her that she has beautiful blue eyes and silky gray hair as I comb through it. The creases in her forehead become deeper when the percussion comes on strong behind Sinatra’s voice; I change the music to something softer. I linger… again she takes my hand in hers and ‘recognizes’ me again, this time kissing it. I tell her I love her. Though I truly do love her, I tell her not to express my own feelings because she needs to hear the words. In this moment I am glad to be for her the daughter who does not visit her. In hopes to make up for the time I did not spend stroking my mother’s hair, I now graciously arrange the delicate strands of gray around the face of Mrs. C.
During grad school, the topic of “dying with dignity” came up multiple times. Some of my fellow students had the notion that certain medical treatments could deny them their dignity. They expressed that they would rather be dead than to “lose their dignity” and linger on in ‘this state’ or ‘that…’. They believe that the quality or value of life is measured in ability, not simply in being alive. In every conversation in any context, I took exception to this opinion. Human life is sacred not because of the function of the mind or body, or the value that others place on a person’s actions, but “because from its beginning it involves the creative action of God and it remains forever in a special relationship with the Creator, who is its sole end.” (Catechism of the Catholic Church [CCC], 1997, para 2258) Hastening death for fear of a lack of dignity is not only contrary to natural law, but contradicts the nature of inherent dignity.
Having dignity does not mean you are valued by others, it means you are worthy of being valued.
Wikipedia (2022) defines dignity as the state of being worthy of honor and respect; it says nothing about being honored or respected. Having dignity does not mean you are valued by others, it means you are worthy of being valued. That worth does not come from other people, but from God. It can be recognized or ignored, but it cannot be taken away from the person. This means that even with the use of any means of medical care, the person maintains dignity. What may lack is the ability of others to recognize it. While the Catechism of the Catholic Church (1997) allows for the “discontinuing of medical procedures that are burdensome, dangerous, extraordinary, or disproportionate to the expected outcome,” ordinary care must be maintained even when death is imminent (paras 2278-2279). So one may choose to not proceed with, or continue medical intervention that could be considered burdensome or extraordinary, particularly if this burden is greater than the benefit one would gain from the procedure or treatment. What many fail to understand is that the perceived lack of dignity – or the fear of a lack of dignity – is not a reason to withhold medical treatment. On the contrary, it is because of the person’s inherent dignity that any treatment that is not burdensome or extraordinary must be given and maintained. Further, the burden of recognizing dignity is the responsibility of everyone except the dying person; her dignity is within her, recognized or not.
I watched my mother lose her ability to perform the most basic bodily functions such as swallowing before she died quietly in the middle of the night while I slept. Nine months pregnant with my sixth child, I trusted the hospice doctor and nurses to make decisions and tell me what I should do from week to week. With my inexperienced eyes, I saw a blurred line between palliative care and wanting her to move on so that she would not be suffering; the one thing I was sure of is that I wanted her to not be in pain anymore. She was unable to communicate in her final days. Or, I should say, I was unable to understand her. I had no hospice experience, and only after she died did I realize how emotionally immature I was. I projected my weaknesses and inability to care for her onto her, believing that she was losing her dignity when in reality I had simply failed to recognize it.
The absence of Mrs. C’s daughter tells me that she does not recognize the dignity in her frail bed-bound mother. Although I am tempted to call her and tell her how much I enjoyed my visit with her beautiful mother, and how we listened to music together and it made me laugh and cry, I will simply keep the moments to myself and be who her mother needs someone to be- one who recognizes her dignity all the way to her natural end.
References:
Catechism of the Catholic Church (2nd edition). (1997). Lebreria Editrice Vaticana.Dignity. (2022, Dec.16) in Wikipedia. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dignity
I read the “Purpose Driven Life” Do we keep it inside? We are here to help others so we help. I am going to talk about not being able to walk. How does this happen at 50? You see it commonly in 80-year-olds, but not commonly in 40, 50, or 60-year-olds. How did it happen to me?
1. I found out I was eating too much food, I thought I needed it, and I thought I needed more! I thought why was I hungry all the time if I didn’t need it?
2. I was eating foods that inflamed my body. Now, are symptoms of arthritis really eating inflammatory foods? I could not bend over to tie my shoes. I couldn’t put on my pants and I had trouble walking up and down stairs. I couldn’t stand to cook. and I couldn’t turn my head to see oncoming traffic.
So what did I do? I started with a book, and I started eliminating the things that didn’t work. I still wasn’t “there” after a time, and I found a test that told me I needed more of a certain nutrient to just feel well. When I started adding it, I started feeling better. Unfortunately, I was still encountering bouts of pain and not being able to walk.
It could be psychological, my husband works through it. He works anyway, though he has pain. I couldn’t do it. I had too much pain. So, how did I get rid of my pain?
First I removed my inflammatory foods, and for me, it was wheat and tomatoes. For my blood type B friends, it is more like chicken. So different foods impact different people differently.
This is why I started a course, you deserve to have the steps that guide you to your best health www.12keys2basichealthcourse.com, which is about where I started. You deserve to start to get to where you want.
Things changed from 45–70 and I have a process for this too. We lose muscle mass as we age, and our digestion gets overloaded. We use a test to determine our best foods. It worked for me, it worked for my friend in Mexico (I met her on Facebook) it works for many people. Learning how to remove your trigger foods, can help you eat more efficiently.
By joining Facebook blood type groups, I have learned what they say and do. Working with my Medical Technology and Microbiology friend, I have information on what and how she worked through this process.
I have partnered with Dr. Ben Lynch and learned why he does what he does, and I love his test. It enabled me to learn from Elizma Lambert why this works, and why everyone needs to know.
You deserve to learn, because, I healed my gums and my dentist wanted to know how… I helped my 80-year-old friend lose 115 pounds, and she cured her diverticulosis and sleeps better. Up from 5-6 hours to 7–8 hours.
You can heal, I healed my whole body, (I have the Lou Gehrig’s gene.) If you are suffering and want to feel fit at any age, let’s talk. www.talkwithkristi.com
Begin again…and again…
and again.
Life invites us to wake up…awaken up
come alive and thrive
Every moment…every breath
can be a fresh start
An invigorating spark…
a step out of the dark
An invitation to lighten up…
enlighten up
And find a replenishing way
to say YES to life
and NO to strife
To toss away whatever is
weighing us down…making us frown
And take a profound or courageous
or even outrageous leap
Toward something more
insightful and delightful
Simply because we can…or at the very least
we can reach and grow and go
Beyond our stuck in the mud mindset
toward an attitudinal reset
Beyond our current (dis)comfort zone
Toward infinite gifts of the unknown
There is guidance everywhere
if you care to stay aware
Just show up and pay attention
and you will find inspiration…
or perhaps it will find you
* This poem was inspired by Deanna Black, who led a yoga retreat that I attended a while ago and who spoke of the endless ways we are ongoingly invited to begin again.
from the heart, mind, and pen of Minx
Say Yes to What’s Next and Yet Appreciate the Now, Gail McDonald and Susan Sneath discuss the connection between the ‘Now’ and ‘What’s Next’, as well as the importance and challenge of getting what we want, while appreciating the ‘Now’ in our lives!
I told a friend yesterday that “a soft, sweet voice talking about gratitude does not make me want to practice gratitude. It makes me want to shoot heroin.” This was in a conversation about the origins of Get the F__k Off, and WHY I decided to create with blasting aggression and profanity.
Years ago, in my own personal development journey, I could not…. in fact I would not receive love and guidance from people who had all of my best intentions at heart. Maybe it started in 8th grade when my guidance counselor was trying to coax me into giving her information about fellating a senior in the high school auditorium. All I heard behind that soft tone was jail bars and my reputation.
Who the f__k knows?
I just know that when your life is going to hell, and you’re hanging off a barstool at 4:00 am in the middle of Times Square every night, people f––king screaming and doing lines in the bathroom, the last thing you want to do is hear some child whose body has never been stretched sixteen ways to Sunday talk about f––king gratitude.
A lot of times, these “tough” identities are extremely protective, developed long before we were conscious enough to know we made a choice.
And I think for me (and many people I have known in my life) it was just impossible to trust that without that external layer of protection, life could be managed at all. I certainly thought that “giving this up” or “giving that up” would contribute to an image of weakness, sadness, low energy, and lack of fulfillment and success. I thought my image was important. It was important!
(And let’s be real– I’m a lot sexier to the voyeuristic world living in New York City than if I was in Wallace, Idaho.)
And yet, it’s important to notice when that stuff isn’t giving us the life we want any longer. For me, it was noticing that anger, venom, binge drinking, making subtle slaps at others, and stacking up my ego against people were not giving me a life I desired. It was making me the opposite of what I wanted to be. It was noticing that all the whiskey I drank to try to mimic a magazine ad was not bringing me that magazine image. I was a bloated f__kwad who was eloquent for about two and a half beers. Then, I became a slur fest. It was noticing that “trying to do it alone” was just keeping me churning in a loop.
And the only reason I got out of it was because I had a rock bottom. My “strong ego” was not strong enough to refuse help any longer. It was forced into submission. It was forced to swallow the voices of people talking about gratitude.
And idfk… I mean look at me. I turned out all right.
But I figured out that not everyone needs to have a rock bottom. What if I could just reach people before that happens? What if I could come into a relationship with someone else and say: “it’s OK for you to hold this identity right now? I get it. You can swear. You don’t have to sit in the lotus and talk about gratitude and eating flaxseeds today.”
These hard, protective identities are 100% made up…
And yet, when we have those hard, protective identities that we developed probably because at one point in time, we HAD TO, people tend to think “you’ve got it.”
People want to just leave you be, and they don’t know how to speak your language. And they think “OK, when she’s ready she’ll come along.” (Or he will, or they…) It’s like… no. Good luck. The hard masculine ego is too strong for that.
It needs to be spoken to in a language it understands.
That it’s OK to be you as you are. You don’t ever have to give that identity up. Maybe you will want to someday. Maybe not.
It’s all OK.
Stay hard
And stay beautiful
He said, ‘Let There be Children’ and many children came to live upon this earth.Lucky were the children born into comfort and wealth.Other children were born with challenges from hunger to health.Yet it didn’t matter if they wore shoes upon their feet; their eyes had a twinkle far from a life of defeat.Their vision was positive, no matter the life condition.Their hearts were full of intention to complete their earthly mission.Journeys to the north and others to the east.Children who were starving while others had a feast.How to comprehend the lack of balance in between.South-to-West conversations are a mix of reality and dream.For babies converse in a language that adults don’t understand. They come to us on this planet from a far-off wonderland. There was peace and safety in the beginning; then as the clock was ticking, the world of safe was spinning.Spinning thread that binds to a cloth that can’t be broken. Words once understood are now no longer spoken.The bridge from paradise was burned into the river. Now children fight the hunger as their skin begins to shiver.Warmth has now been scorched to the sun we have today.We’ve let the icebergs melt to a place now far away.We cannot bring the rainbow back without the rain.Forests burned to dirt will not provide the shade.Shadows of the children are seen within lost dreams. Laughter mixed with tears are glistening star moonbeams.As you look into the sky of wonder every night, hug your children close and bring paradise back to right.
Covid Climate War and Death
Panic-stricken World redress
Year of Horrors just be gone
Cleansing Light descend here on
Stench of bats and bodies cleared
Virus records get unsealed
Burning flesh in Ukraine fields
Arctic grass is just revealed
Putin, Xi, and Raissi
Doomsday Riders are just three
WHO, UN and Russia too
We can do without you
Klaus, Billy, Zuck, and Musk
Social Nets are firmly cast
Dollar rain is pouring fast
Winners only game a blast
Science on the wall
WHO’s the safest of them all
Pick your fav mRNA
Magic jab is here to stay
Covid Climate War and Death
How did we become a mess
How did we become so blind
To surrender all our rights
Covid Climate War and Death
Time to rise for the oppressed
Time of reckoning is now
To reclaim the reins of power
Let’s make 2023 a Year of global turnaround!
For the past number of years, I have chosen a word for the following year. Some of the words I have chosen are Grace, Nourish, and Harmony.
This year, as we move forward into 2023, I have chosen once again the word Connection.
Change the dance of your conversations to build connection, invest in relationships, and empower others.
~Sharon K. Summerfield
For me this past year I have navigated several health issues. I cannot begin to express how much it has meant people checking in. Simple questions how are you? Is there anything you need? And how can I help? All these questions and creating space to listen helped to build connection.
Our next health crisis honestly is not another flu, it is loneliness.
Over the past number of years, the ways we connect have changed. We have numerous tools to connect. Having more ways to be “on” and connected has created more disconnection. This is the time for Grace.
May we give ourselves grace and embrace the possibilities of a new day.
~Sharon K. Summerfield
As Dr. Vivek Murthy shared in his book, Together – The Healing Power of Human Connection in a Sometimes Lonely World, and in his conversation with Brene Brown, finding those ways to connect and share our stories is vital to our well-being.
When we look at ways to prevent and recover from burnout finding those ways to create connection is key. It is so important we consider how we are coming together, does this energize us? In what ways can we create greater harmony?
In creating harmony we find new ways to blend the melodic rhythm in the dance of life.
~Sharon K. Summerfield
As we look at ways to give ourselves grace and create harmony it is also key to consider what will nourish us. There are times when we need to pause and consider what do I need in this moment. This can be as simple as taking time to meditate, go for a walk, or just be.
Let us nourish our body, mind, and spirit by eating with greater mindfulness.
~Sharon K. Summerfield
As we move forward into 2023, to build connection we first really need to look at how we can yes more often to ourselves. This does mean carefully looking at our true priorities. When we are invited to attend various events and meetings, both personal and professional, it is so important we ask ourselves will this energize me? Taking into account everything on our plates, can I bring my best to this activity? Or do I need to pause and share my thanks for the invitation and send regrets.
Finding those ways to connect with others begins with how we connect with ourselves. We can then choose.
In what ways can you create greater connection in your life?
Be kind.
Be patient.
Be nourished in all you do.
Episode SummaryWhat if we decided that we are not lost but exploring new territory; how would our story sound then?
Episode NotesHello to you listening in Bedford, England! Coming to you from Whidbey Island, Washington this is Stories From Women Who Walk with 60 Seconds for Story Prompt Friday and your host, Diane Wyzga.
I’ve known my friend Gene, a former US Navy hospital corpsman, many years since we served together at Portsmouth Naval Hospital. Gene’s eyesight isn’t what it used to be but fortunately, the Veterans Affairs offers skills training, products and services to help him better navigate obstacles that come with living daily life. All this takes place on a hospital campus where military veterans come to spend a few weeks or more.
Some of those military veterans are totally blind as well as new to the VA facility. One task is to learn how to get around the campus, and figure out how to make it from the dorms to the mess hall to classes. Gene said that he remembered when he got lost finding his way around. And he remembered being told that he could not say, “I am lost” when he asked for help. Instead, he was encouraged to say, “I am exploring new territory. And I need a little help.”
Story Prompt: What if we saw our lives through different lenses? What if we decided we are not lost, only exploring new territory? How might that change our perspective? Write that story!
Practical Tip: The magic of stories is also in the sharing. If you wish share your story with someone or something. All that matters is you have a story.
You’re invited: “Come for the stories – stay for the magic!” Speaking of magic, I hope you’ll subscribe, follow, share a 5-star rating and nice review on your social media or podcast channel of choice, and join us next time! Remember to stop by the SOON-TO-BE-IMPROVED website, check out the Services, arrange a Discovery Call, and Opt-In to stay current with Diane and Quarter Moon Story Arts and on LinkedIn.
Stories From Women Who Walk Production Team
Podcaster: Diane F Wyzga & Quarter Moon Story Arts
Music: Mer’s Waltz from Crossing the Waters by Steve Schuch & Night Heron Music
All content and image © 2019 to Present: for credit & attribution Quarter Moon Story Arts
Leadership includes sharing what you learn so that others may follow and surpass your efforts. Why surpass? Because where one may be today marks a unique point in time, the one factor we can all count on is societal change. As we embrace the best advice, we can add it to our repertoire and enhance it as we move forward. Even better is when more people willingly share their best strategies with those on similar paths. The sign of leadership excellence is in the appreciation one receives.
The sign of leadership excellence is in the appreciation one receives. Below you will find what I believe to be top-notch business advice from leaders in the field.
My StoryOne traditional way to share information is through publishing articles and books. Early in my career, Dale Carnegie’s book, ‘How to Win Friends and Influence People’ put me on a better footing for sales success. The secret is not to sell so much, but instead, listen, be professionally personal while sharing stories, and find commonalities between you. Upon developing the relationship, trust builds, and sales are born.
The next book that empowered my sales effort was S.P.I.N. Selling by Neil Rackham. It was the opposite of traditional telling-selling, which spoke to me as I always grasp ‘the opposite’ of tradition. Remembering questions in specific vocabulary is not for me. However, four letters that portray the questions to ask, in my own words, are easy to remember. SPIN stands for ‘Situation, Problem(s), Implied problem(s), and Need. My sales effort greatly improved upon applying Neil Rackham’s suggestions.
An old television and movie quote comes to mind that indicates perhaps there is an even better way to do business, ‘There is a new sheriff in town.’ Focusing solely on sales, marketing, technology, or any other business discipline will not create the results you may seek in today’s environment. Accordingly, it is up to each of us to seek out top-notch business advice from leaders in the field.
Powerhouse Business GrowthToday’s success differentiator is to embrace and combine all the varying disciplines for powerhouse business growth. To my amazement, what typically would be kept secret is openly spelled out in the brand-new book, Reinventing Virtual Events, published by Wiley, and authored by Julia Nimchinski and Justin Michael. The content spells out top-notch business advice from leaders in the field.
Reinvention is Essential for GrowthAlthough planning a virtual event may be outside your plan, the concepts and facts behind the title are bound to help businesses of all types. The theme is to cross-train the skills of staff and oneself. It’s only the beginning to have an excellent skillset in one field, but imagine how and what a cross-over to other disciplines will do for your career or business.
Long ago, a coach advised me to continue adding streams to my core expertise of sales for a more robust output. He then spoke of the ‘Power of 10.’ When we possess one skill, we reach one audience. But the results can be exponential when we expand upon our skills and services, to ten offerings, as an example. Mathematically, when we multiply 10 x 9 x 8 down to 1, the powerhouse business growth number is 3,628,800.
It may sound unimaginable to dedicate oneself to learning the skillset of ten different careers. However, when we undertake to learn the essentials of a couple of other disciplines, we are well on our way. Cross-training oneself plus employees will guide you to the results you desire that may have been previously unimaginable.
HYPCCCYCL is the creation of Julia and Justin, featuring top B2B revenue leaders cross-training their GTM (go-to-market) skills with VCs. The content of Reinventing Virtual Events provides excellent insights to enable you and your teams to achieve more than you may currently believe to be possible. Watching the games in action is remarkable, an ideal learning vehicle, and viewers often participate in future rounds. The book sets the stage for our new business model, and we invite you to join the performance, literally.
If you have any lingering doubts or are consumed with intrigue, you may find more information about Julia Nimchinski and Justin Michael on their LinkedIn profiles.
Office Environment and Entrepreneurial SpiritToday’s theme is not only about learning and combining varying skill sets but also embraces the theme of an inclusive environment. Each person on one team possesses experience and knowledge. Above, we speak about exponential results. Imagine what the cross-over of training between disciplines utilizing everyone’s experience can do for the overall business growth outcome. Moreover, the diversity of teams adds to a greater depth of knowledge that may convert to intriguing a far more robust audience.
In Conclusion: Top-Notch Business Advice from Leaders In The FieldThe choice is always ours to either dismiss the business advice from leaders or pay serious attention to do our due diligence by researching what they have to say. Feeling secure with your current knowledge becomes the right time to heed top-notch business advice from leaders in the field who are making a difference in society.
Previously, I had run away from home hitchhiking all over the south with my boyfriend Basil. To the present state of Arkansas. Basil had taken off to parts of the unknown and left me with the strangers that had taken us in.
ENJOY ALL PRIOR PARTS BELOW↴
Runaway (Part 5)
After the first two weeks he was gone, I found myself crying myself to sleep once again and wondering was, he going to come back for me at all. It had been three long weeks since I had seen Basil. Believing I would never lay eyes on him again and wondering if I would ever get up enough nerve to go home on my own and how would I get there. I kept wondering what was going on back home and how would they all take me coming back. No one in my family had ever left before. I could just hear my dad now yelling at me in a rage and telling me I wasn’t welcome there anymore. Funny had more fear at the thought of returning home than my departure.
Basil did return after about three weeks and the very next day we set out again for Waterloo Iowa. Home sweet home, I was going home finally. The trip home really was surprisingly uneventful. We caught rides and walked quite a spell. All the while I kept having these visions of defeat when I arrived. Dad, being mad as h**l. I’d called my friend Luanne up and told her I was coming home. The plan was to go to her house to collect my thoughts. Seemed the appropriate place as after all, that’s where our journey had begun. The lie of going shopping with her and instead hitting the road with Basil for unknown territories.
When we finally arrived in town we went straight to Luanne’s house. She told us that my dad had been looking for me and that he was going to press charges against Basil as he was nineteen and I was sixteen. I didn’t want that to happen I cared for Basil dearly. Luanne’s Mother was home, and Luanne took off for a while. Basil had disappeared as well.
I was sitting in the kitchen looking out the window when I saw my dad’s blue ford pickup truck pull in. I looked at Luanne’s mother with pure fear on my face. I desperately told her; my dad is in the driveway what should I do? Her reply was simply to go and answer the door. I swallowed the lump in my throat held back the tears and I did just that. I went to answer the door.
He came striding in the door and he was so tall. Taller than I remembered. I felt myself shrinking in his presence. My head was down, and I was trying not to make eye contact. He walked up to me put his arms around me and looked down at me. I slowly raised me gaze upwards to meet him in the eyes. He said, you big dummy I didn’t have anyone to watch T.V. with. It was then we both broke down and cried. I had no recollection of my dad ever hugging me, but he did that day. We both stood there a long moment and somehow, I knew everything was going to be okay. Dad asked me, are you ready to come home? So, we both said goodbye to Luanne’s Mother and got into his pickup truck, and headed home.
He had changed my father. Gone was the anger in his eyes and across his brow. I could only see worried lines now. He was calm and not angry as I expected. Somehow, I knew things would be different and it would be okay. I was finally home and that’s all that mattered. I could deal with what life threw my way because I was much stronger now and all the wiser from being on the road.
My mother had no idea I had returned as she was still at work. Dad told me to hide in the bathroom when she pulled in the driveway and to come out when mom got into the house. When she arrived, I walked out of the bathroom with a smile on my face but what met my eyes was not my loving mothers’ eyes. No, she was staring at me with contempt, and I was confused why would she be mad? Isn’t she happy to see me? Glaring at me she spoke, so your alive I had wished they had found you in the ditch half dead so I would know where you were at! My mother had become hard like my dad and dad had become understanding like my mom. Talk about throwing me for a loop. She was angry with me.
I went to summer school to make up credits and got back into my grade at East High School. Basil stuck around a while Mom and Dad even let him stay in the basement for a while, but he was a wayward traveler and had no ties to anything, He left one night in the middle of the night and I never saw him again. Mom remained bitter towards me all my high school years and I had to work at earning her trust again. Not an easy task as she thought I was going to run away again. Even threatened to sit on me if she had to and tie me to my bed.
But I promised I would never run away again after that and I kept that promise despite the struggle I had adjusting. I had a newfound strength to stand up for myself and not be taken advantage of anymore, I refused to be a victim. I was a true survivor. I learned a lot that summer I was on the road which has been with me for a lifetime now. Today I have compassion and I am a child advocate! Today I hold my head up high and look into the eyes of people and I read them, and I put myself in their shoes and I try my best to understand the cycle of abuse so many go through. I am no longer that little girl that was a victim I am a true survivor and I attribute it to the wisdom I gained while on the road so many years ago.
______________________________
Epilogue: Do not do as I did so many years ago. Hitch-hiking is extremely dangerous. You never know who might pick you up. I got lucky. Back in the 1970s, it was not illegal to hitchhike, but it still wasn’t safe. If you’re abused at home, there are a lot of resources nowadays. You can speak to a teacher or counselor or a friend that can speak for you. There are youth shelters now for kids in need of assistance. And people out there that care and do believe you! I can’t stress enough that it’s not safe to run away as I did. Each state and city have a department of human services that can help. Tell someone –the police, a friend, a parent –anyone you feel you can trust.
The Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline is 1-800-422-4453. For an emergency call 911!
© Eva Marie Ann Cagley
The night was slowly slipping its way into the morning when the rooster started crowing and the songbirds awakened the new day. The sunrise broke the tree line just beyond the pasture filling the sky with a collage of colors. I crawled out of bed to get dressed and I felt more than ready for a shave and some heavy clothes. I put some cut wood in the potbelly stove to get some warmth in the house. March had arrived but the nights were still cold, and we were still getting some snow flurries just before dawn.
I put some water on the stove for coffee and cracked two eggs in the skillet, throwing in some cheese, bacon, and bread to toast. It was noticeable to me that I had gained a few pounds and grew muscles too. It wasn’t a fancy farm, there was wood to chop, animals to feed and I always walked the perimeter of the farm in the mornings with Henry’s cattle dog. He had become a constant companion and guide.
I could feel the new strength in my body and my mind had more clarity. I was writing stories again and the work had given me more stamina.
I felt the healing in my heart and I felt hope again. Soon I will be ready to leave the farm and say goodbyes to my friend Henry. It was time for me to find my way home.
It has been almost three years since I have seen my family. Perhaps it was time to pick up the axe and chop wood a spell, then load up my Chevy van and start down the dirt road, and head for the Carolina shores.
Henry pulled up near the back door, seeing that I was loading up he smiled and walked over, giving me a long hug then handed me a letter from my mom. I opened it up and all that was written was two words.
Come Home!
Henry waved goodbye and I headed out with tears in my eyes and a heart aching to go home. Blasting on the radio was the song Rambling Man by The Allman Brothers Band. A good start indeed!
Coming soon Part Four – Home
Roosters Crowing And Train Whistle Blowing | BIZCATALYST 360°
Scars, Bars, and Blues | BIZCATALYST 360°
Will it be good news or will it be bad?
I know not the difference, for that I am glad
The conductor of Truth holds our lives in His hand
minds cannot grasp but our hearts understand
This isn’t a game, not a trend nor a fad
but the climax of lifetimes with nothing to add
Alone before God, stripped of fear we now stand
in places and spaces where once we felt banned
With steadfast devotion, no leaning to gad
to stray from our course or waste time being sad
Homeward bound toward a new and proclaimed promised land
Souls united as One to an ancient command
In feathers of freedom our forms now are clad
released from the shackles of pain we once had
Committed to destiny, not what we planned…
surrendered to Grace, flame by flame, strand by strand.
I was shocked to hear of the death of Jeff Beck at just 78 years of age. In terms of finding an epitome for his life, the title of David Bowie’s song Sound and Vision sums him up. Jeff Beck had vision. Although he started in what could be described as a blues tradition through The Yardbirds, Beck never repeated himself. He took his followers on a journey through many genres of music. The relentless pursuit of being different may have had consequences in terms of his popular appeal, but Jeff Beck is ‘the guitarists guitarist’. Having ‘vision’ is necessary in many walks of life, but it is insufficient if you don’t have the capability and intent to fulfil that vision. This brings me to Beck’s unique execution skills and ‘sound’.
In terms of sound, the vast majority of Jeff Beck’s genius resided in his right hand. Sure he was a capable technician and master of his left hand, but the tone of his guitar playing and the otherworldly sonics he was able to extract from his right hand are the clue as to what made Beck a standout musician. This article is not a tutorial in guitar playing, but a careful examination of some of Jeff Beck’s guitar playing will reveal his secrets, both in terms of the use of his fingers to pick out extraordinary ranges of volume and tone, the simultaneous use of the tremolo arm and volume controls.
Perhaps this video at Ronnie Scotts’ Jazz Club shows his work better than words alone can describe:
I discussed Beck’s style with jazz legend and Django Reinhardt aficionado John Etheridge. John pointed out that Beck’s emanates partly from not being trained on how to do things properly. In the 1950s and ’60s, guitar training videos to ‘play like Iron Maiden’ just did not exist! I recall my own experience of buying the Bert Weedon book ‘Play in a day’. Weedon was something of a charlatan with his title, in so far as it was true that I was able to play something in a day, but not like Jeff Beck! Etheridge points out that a great deal of the original playing styles that have emerged from the greats emanated from people who were not trained in the formal sense of the word. In other words, the idiosyncrasies that made them great were due to not being taught to play properly in the first place!! Many young musicians have access to tremendous resources today, but it tends to turn out “template players”. There’s nothing wrong with this, but the aural equivalent of “painting by numbers” may not turn out people like Jeff Beck and Jimi Hendrix. For me, there is a massive parallel in the world of business where standardisation of work practices reduces the possibility of creativity and innovation.
Play in a day: Perhaps an optimistic hope in my case!Here is John Etheridge explaining how this led to elements of Jeff Beck’s unique sound:
I nearly met Jeff once in a remote pub called The Three Chimneys in Biddenden, Kent. The pub used to offer a ploughman’s lunch to die for at lunchtimes and Jeff obviously knew this as I did. Imagine my surprise when he walked into the bar and ordered himself one. I was too shy to approach Mr. Beck and assumed that he had come there for some privacy anyway. On reflection, I’m glad I respected this, although I’d have loved to talk with him about music, tone and how to escape from the ‘aural mousewheel’ of scales and musical training.
Ah well.
Hidden from view in Kent: The Three ChimneysThis story by my friend Jay Stapley sums up what a ‘nice bloke’ Jeff Beck was. Jay has played with many music legends such as Roger Waters, Mike Oldfield and Toyah Wilcox.
Jeff was a master who paid as much attention to the end of each note as he did to their beginnings and proved beyond doubt that the guitarists’ ‘tone’ comes more from the hands than whatever equipment they use.
Many years ago I was invited to audition for Mick Jagger’s solo project. Jeff was the Musical Director at the time. My girlfriend at the time was kind enough to buy me a ‘nice’ jacket so I looked good for the audition. I duly turned up to find Jeff seated at the back of the rehearsal room. I plugged in and started getting my sound, playing a couple of Country-flavoured hybrid-picking licks. Jeff appeared beside me, plugged in, and we spent a few minutes trading licks and grooves. He left the stage when the audition started. I played a couple of tunes with Mick and the band and then Jeff returned to the stage and joined us. As soon as he started playing I turned my guitar volume off and stopped playing: he simply filled all the sonic space available for the guitar and it felt intrusive to be playing.
I didn’t hear anything from the management so a couple of weeks later I asked my contact about it “OK,” he said, “I’ll ask Mick.”
He called me back a few hours later: “I asked Mick. He said: Oh yeah, Jay Stapley … great guitarist, but he looked like a f__king bank manager.”
I never wore that jacket again but the five minutes playing with Jeff was a highlight of my life.
Jeff Beck 1944 – 2023 Sound and Vision
Featured Image Credit: Chris Hakkens, CC BY-SA 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons
Once again, I begin a new journal as I close out the old. I’ve lost count of how many journals I have written over the years since the age of 12. I am now 72. Journaling, in the beginning, was a form of therapy; a way to write the words of pain on a piece of paper. I would discover that through the writing down of my thoughts, I could be somewhere else, somewhere without pain and sadness. As the years have passed and the journals were filled one by one, I felt a sense of completion for many of the childhood memories I wanted to forget.
As I entered adulthood and discovered that through relationships, which were not meaningful, I began a process of writing to express what I felt inside as a mother, a wife, and a grandmother. I wrote in my journals how I felt I had nothing to offer anyone. That I had failed as a mother, failed in my marriages, and failed God. Yet a voice I knew, that had always been there with me as a child, laying on a table in the emergency room, chin split wide open, saying, “Jesus, Oh Jesus,” was now saying, “Persevere” “I ‘am with you”.
In my first marriage, as a young Catholic girl, at age 18, I looked forward to marrying and being a wife and eventually a mother. But that was not to happen so early in my life. Journaling soon became a daily habit and my prayer life developed intensely over time. I grew closer to God. I gave Him my two kids in life to help me with and as time continued, my grandchildren through prayer. I also gave him my pain from the ongoing chemotherapy and all that came with cancer treatments. But I had to keep writing because of so many heartbreaks I encountered.
Today, I have no contact with my two adult children and four grandchildren. I lost a child that I carry in my heart each day. I have lost three of my siblings, and 3 marriages gone bad, and yet, journaling tells the story as it always has. I will continue to Trust God who knows my heart for the good I have done in life, and grateful for today. I sacrificed a lot in raising my children so that so that they could have a better life. I wasn’t perfect, no one is, but the most important thing is that if my grandchildren were to pick up these dusty journals one day, they will know the story. I will never stop journaling till I am unable to write, or I am called home, my writings will speak for me. They are words of truth. Journals tell a story.
Gumshoe was thoroughly disgusted with the soft kiddie porn of the recent holiday gift ad campaign by the elite fashion magazine of Balenciaga. Sorta like a gift shop located just to the right of the main gate to Hell. Free statues of Baal!
These twisted folks used little girls as props in order to display objects (teddy bears in bondage harnesses, handcuffs) aimed at the perverse tastes and corrupt sexual fantasies of child predators that were staged among the gift assortments. Think of “Where’s Waldo” for sexual deviants.
Did Gumshoe mention the paper copy scattered on a messy desk within the ad of the 2008 Supreme Court decision in the U.S. vs Williams dealing with child pornography? How appropriate and not by accident. What message was that supposed to mean and to whom was the intended recipient?
It seemed to Gumshoe that this pictorial ad could be used by hardcore pedophiles as a “show and tell” grooming aid to ensnare innocent child victims. Damn them all!
Yes, there have been some after-the-fact apologies and mea culpa’s by the Baal worshippers at Balenciaga. Too little too late!
Who approved this ad content prior to its publishing? Implied intent from the get-go Gumshoe surmises. No excuse is possible—evil is evil no matter which way it is displayed.
Gumshoe worked for over five years as a Detective in a Sheriff’s Special Investigation Unit that focused on crimes against children. The majority of the five hundred-plus cases that Gumshoe worked on involved the sexual assaults of children by pedophiles. This was a soul-killing detail for the investigator as well as for the molested children victims. God help them! The depths of evil were never fully plumed by the never-ending cases that would shatter your heart by the incarnate evil perpetrated by the career child predators (beasts) against the most vulnerable child victims.
Now Gumshoe asks the society at large, “Where is the strong public outcry and a call for censor for Balenciaga?” Opprobrium where are you . . .? Crickets.
Remember to love the ones who love you and try to love the ones who don’t.
Coram Deo!
PS: Please include in your prayers the known as well as the unknown child victims of sexual and physical abuse.
A Death wish …you may say!? Well, when you’ve got your head up in the clouds anything’s possible.
So for starters, Lord, when my days on earth are over and you decide to take me; please…just a few stops along the way. I dread the loss of heaven and the pains of hell. And I would prefer to take the more scenic route.
I hope if we spot a rainbow along the way, we can slide over it. I would also like to find the sign that says: “Angels Gather here!” That could be my temporary drop-off.
Who knows…they may even be expecting me. They’ve been my guardians all along and I have so much gratitude to pour out onto them for the many ways they have assisted me throughout life. Plus, Lord, I’ve always wanted a ride on angels’ wings so I hope you don’t mind as I feel this will perhaps be…my last chance on a wing and a prayer…
You mentioned previously that you have prepared the way and that the only way to heaven is through you, so would you be open to meeting the angels and me at the gate? The angels will then be ready to hand me over, I’m sure and I’m fully confident that YOU can take it from there.
Sometime during my Holiday Season musings, I came across two posts from the editors at LinkedIn News. Since I detected no tongues in cheeks, I took them to be evidence of the extent to which we’ve become purely reactive; that is, in the absence of critical thinking, questioning, and anticipation, we observe and react. That’s all. Everything is new and novel to us, a constant process of discovery and re-discovery because we don’t think, we don’t study history, and we’d choose not to remember it if we did.
A rule of thumb for sharing information, in writing or in formal presentations, used to be, “Tell them what you’re going to tell them. Tell them. Then tell them what you told them.” That’s all changed. As we’ve deliberately become more unknowing, as we’ve deliberately started thinking less critically, and as we’ve deliberately resigned ourselves to asking fewer and fewer questions, the new rule of thumb is this: “Tell them what they already know, should know, or should have been able to know. Tell them again. Then tell them again.”
Exhibit A
In a post called, “Why work won’t ‘return to normal’”, we find this keen observation:
After the turmoil of the pandemic, 2022 was supposed to be the year that work returned to normal. That didn’t happen … because so few workers want to go back to the old ways. They expressed their dissatisfaction with pre-pandemic norms by quitting jobs in historic numbers, while others tried to improve their current jobs by striking and unionizing.
Let’s see. People have been working largely the same way — reporting to a place other than home in which to toil — for 262 years (give or take), and we’re surprised that with the forced alternative of a global pandemic people don’t want to go back to being historical artifacts.
We’ll lower the bar on this one and not even suggest the irony in the fact that this radical change in employment circumstances was the result of a political/economic shutdown that never should have happened.
Let’s put on our surprised faces and soldier on, shall we?
Exhibit B
Following that, in this post from the Dots? What Dots? Department — “Are big corporate HQs fading away?” — we find this abject failure of connection:
As companies grow more accustomed to remote and hybrid work, many are also beginning to say farewell to large, sprawling offices … [as] companies reach their lease renewal dates, many are considering subletting their vacant space … this shift could send office real estate value tumbling by as much as $450 billion. This could hurt urban economies that depend on office work for jobs and tax revenue.
As companies grow more accustomed to remote and hybrid work? Is it possible to grow more accustomed to something that’s being forced on you, especially if it’s uncomfortable or threatens your ability to survive? That’s like saying, “As people grow more accustomed to waterboarding ….” What?! Companies aren’t growing more accustomed to anything, except, perhaps, the fact that folks aren’t eager to run back to the grind of business as usual, at least not in pre-pandemic numbers.
Unless they need the real estate losses as tax write-offs, they have alternate revenue streams to cover the cost of empty buildings, they’re doing their parts to contribute to urban decay, or they’re cognitively ill-equipped to be in business, companies don’t have a choice but to sell or sublease space. That’s not rocket science. It’s a combination of simple math, practicality, and reality. (Oh, no! Not that!)
The Moral of the Story
Henry Ford said, “Thinking is the hardest work there is, which is probably the reason so few engage in it.” He’s right, of course. But we’re making it harder than it has to be.
Maybe we refrain from thinking because we’re given so much to think about. If that’s true (I believe it is), what would happen if we didn’t think about everything we’re given to think about? Not all the information that bombards us every day is worthy of our consideration. Not all of it is worthy of believing. And most of it is worthy of questioning.
As Norman Whitfield and Barrett Strong wrote in “I Heard it Through the Grapevine”, in a much simpler day and time, “People say believe half of what you see, son, and none of what you hear.”
If we take their advice, maybe stating the obvious won’t have to be the new normal.
Consider every person in the USA that wakes up in the morning. What if there were some form of synergy with others worldwide; not knowing a couple of million folks of course? For that matter, any country. What are the first thoughts that enter your head? Do we step out of a dream into reality trying to reconnect with a dream?
I have written essays describing ‘flying dreams’ in one of my ebooks that BizCatalyst 360° brought to visuality by Dennis Pitocco’s brilliant creators.
A Beacon of Positivity
I certainly do fly!! No wings.
Very occasional ‘flying dreams’! And when gently flying around seeing the world from a different perspective, landing on reality’s ‘ landing platform can be rather dull! Perhaps flying beside a swan where there is mutual synergy; as if a flying human is perfectly normal.
‘Ordinary’ dreams can wake you with a shock; potentially unpleasant or perhaps traumatised when a Chevrolet Corvette Stingray is delivered in the wrong color. Worse or when waking up, wondering if Mom and Dad were really quietly talking with me. Ir often just one parent. Were they transported by an Angel to provide occasional or rare contact.?
Dreams are real. You don’t think you’re dreaming when dreaming. It may have some influence on your day ahead, subliminally influencing you; to follow certain aspects of the dream. Often waking up with a shock.
Flying dreams; are truly awesome. And people on the sidewalk may look up but shock or surprise enters not their feelings. Perfectly normal.
Well, it’s 23.40 hours! Time to take off for a slumber.
Most of you know Charlie Walker as one of the founding members of Dirt Road Storytellers. Charlie crossed over at two o’clock today (1/15/23). Charlie was one of my very best friends as he was with many of you. Let us remember him as an amazing fly fisherman, great storyteller, and dear friend.
Charlie loved life and lived it in God’s light. I will miss him so much.
Your wedding day is one of the most important days of your life, and you want to make sure that everything goes according to plan. So many details go into planning the perfect wedding day, but if you start early and plan ahead, you can make sure that your special day is a success. The following blog post will discuss all of the things you need in place for your wedding to ensure it’s a success.
1 A Wedding PlannerPlanning a wedding can be overwhelming and time-consuming, so it’s best to hire a professional wedding planner to handle the details. They will ensure that everything runs smoothly on your big day and will also be able to provide advice regarding vendors, budgeting, décor, and more. You may even want to consider hiring them before the festivities begin, as they can help with pre-wedding tasks such as sending out save-the-dates or organizing rehearsal dinners. Either way, it’s always good to have someone in charge who has experience in this area – it could make all the difference in making your dream wedding come true!
2 Venue/LocationThe most important thing for any wedding is the venue or location where it will take place. You want to ensure that the venue or location can accommodate all of your guests comfortably and that there is enough space for everything from decorations and food stations to dancing and entertainment. Depending on the size of your wedding, you may need to look at venues or locations with multiple rooms or outdoor areas. When selecting a venue, also consider whether they offer catering services, as this will help reduce some stress on you during your big day.
3 InvitationsOnce you have settled on a date and a venue, it’s time to start sending out invitations. Send out invites at least two months before the wedding so that everyone has ample time for preparation and travel if necessary. It’s important to give guests plenty of time prior to the wedding so they can plan accordingly. Also, consider including an RSVP card with each invitation so that you know how many people will attend in advance; this will also help with organizing seating arrangements and food counts if needed.
4 Wedding Gown & AccessoriesAn essential part of any bride’s special day will be her dress and accessories! Consider looking through bridal magazines or websites for inspiration before heading out shopping for gowns; this will help narrow down your search when it comes time to pick one out! Also, don’t forget about accessories such as jewelry pieces, veils, tiaras, shoes, etc., as these can really help complete the look! Hiring a professional makeup artist could also be beneficial as they can create looks specifically tailored towards each bride’s needs and preferences while still looking natural in photos taken throughout their big day!
5 The RingsThe rings are one of the most essential pieces to a wedding as they symbolize eternal love and commitment between two people. Finding the perfect rings for you and your partner can take some time, so it’s best to start shopping early. Consider looking into precious stones or diamonds if you want something extra special – these will surely stand out from anything else! Also, don’t forget about having your rings engraved with a meaningful message – this will always be a treasured reminder of the special bond you share.
6 An OfficiantYour wedding day isn’t complete without a qualified officiant to marry you and your spouse. Depending on your religious or spiritual beliefs, you may need to look for a minister or other religious figure to perform the ceremony. Consider hiring someone willing to customize their services according to your wishes and discuss any requests with them in advance, so there’s no confusion on the day of the wedding. For example, if you want your officiant to read Psalms or other passages during the ceremony, make sure they know this prior to the big day.
7 A Master Of CeremoniesTo help ensure a smooth and organized wedding day, consider hiring a master of ceremony or MC. An MC is a person who will act as the host or narrator throughout the wedding ceremony and reception. Their job is to keep things flowing smoothly, ensuring that all scheduled events are carried out in a timely manner. They can also provide guests with entertainment throughout the evening by introducing speakers and narrating important moments such as first dances, cake cutting, etc.
8 An Experienced PhotographerYour wedding day is going to be filled with special moments that you’ll want to take pictures of, so make sure you hire a professional and experienced photographer who can capture them all! Make sure to discuss your expectations for the photos ahead of time and request sample prints or digital files so that you know what quality they provide. Look through portfolios before making a decision on which one to use, as this will give you an idea of their style and expertise.
9 Amazing MusicDon’t forget about the music! A great way to make your wedding day one to remember is by having a live band or DJ for entertainment. This can be used for both the ceremony and reception and will help set the tone for an evening of fun and dancing. You may also want to consider hiring singers or string quartets if you’re looking for something more classic and elegant. Be sure to discuss your specific requests with them ahead of time, so there are no surprises on the big day!
10 Seating ArrangementsSeating arrangements should be taken into consideration as this can make or break a wedding! Ensure that there’s enough space for everyone and that your guests will feel comfortable during the ceremony. Decide whether you want a traditional seating arrangement with rows of chairs or prefer something more unique, like benches or sofas. Don’t forget to also consider your guests’ needs, such as access to power outlets if necessary, special dietary requirements, etc., so that they have an enjoyable experience at your wedding!
11 A Delicious MenuNo wedding is complete without delicious food and drinks! Consider having various options available, from light appetizers to entrees and desserts, so that everyone will enjoy something they can enjoy. Take the time to research different catering companies in your area or speak with family and friends for recommendations. If possible, try and get samples of the dishes before you make your final decision on which caterer to use; this way, you can see how the meal will taste ahead of time and make any necessary adjustments.
12 Beautiful FlowersFlowers are a must-have at any wedding! Not only will they add beauty to the ceremony and reception, but they’ll also bring life to your photos. When choosing which flowers to use, consider your color palette and the season in which you’re getting married. For example, spring weddings are ideal for bright and vibrant colors like pink and yellow, whereas fall weddings would be better suited for earthy tones such as oranges and reds. Visit florists in your area or speak with friends and family for recommendations on which flowers would be best for your special day!
13 Favors For GuestsSending your guests home with small gifts is a great way to thank them for attending your wedding. These can be anything from edible treats like chocolates or cookies to practical items such as personalized mugs, keychains, and more. You can also opt for something more sentimental such as a framed photo of the newlyweds or an engraved keepsake box filled with memories from the day. Whatever you choose, it’s sure to leave a lasting impression on all who attended your celebration!
14 TransportationConsider renting a limousine or other luxury car for the wedding party to be transported around on their special day. Not only will it make the event feel more upscale, but it will also ensure that everyone arrives at their destinations on time and in style! If you have an outdoor ceremony and reception, you may also want to consider transportation for guests from one location to the other. This could be done with vans, buses, or even horse-drawn carriages, which can add a unique touch of elegance to your big day!
15 A Back-Up PlanNo matter how much you plan and prepare, there’s always a chance that something could go wrong. For this reason, it’s essential to have a backup plan in place for if and when the unexpected happens. This could involve having alternative transportation arranged in case of bad weather or making sure there are extra supplies available just in case. Additionally, have contact information for all of your vendors as well as any other essential contacts nearby so that you can quickly get help if needed!
By taking care of these details ahead of time, you’ll be well on your way to having a successful wedding day! With the right preparations, creative ideas, and lots of love, this special occasion will be one that both you and your guests remember fondly for years to come. So, don’t forget to enjoy the process and take in all the details while you plan your perfect day.
As we gather together with families and friends during this Christmas Season; in love and kindness to share our blessings and our thankfulness for another year that has come and gone, for the strength and healing we’ve seen in our lives and in the lives of others,
May we take a moment to reflect; on those who’ve fought a good fight but are unable to join us as we look forward with the hope and anticipation of a child to another blessed year, one filled with continued strength, healing, and thankfulness, one where we can be found wearing a smile, even on the hardest of days. And when lacking the strength in ourselves on those days, may we be able to find it in the memory of those who are no longer here, and wear it proudly in their honor.
Lastly, though notably most important, may we be ever mindful of the reason we celebrate this season; why we set aside the time to celebrate with family and friends, why we go out of our way to spread cheer and good tidings to even those unknown individuals we pass by on the street as ships in the night,
May we find hope, thankfulness, and joy not only during this season but throughout the days and years to come, as the shepherds and wise men of old did when they went searching, bearing gifts for the New Messiah and King, the lowly baby born of a virgin, wrapped in swaddling and laying in a manger, as there was no other place to lay Him.
And may we find our life’s inspiration and the strength to push forward against all odds in the fact that long ago, out of love, a love we can not truly comprehend, God thought enough of us to send his Son as a baby to grow and know our way of life and our sorrows, before giving his life for ours that we may have everlasting life.
Maura Ives, Texas A&M University
In 1906, a new carol appeared in “The English Hymnal,” an influential collection of British church music. With words by British poet Christina Rossetti, set to a tune by composer Gustav Holst, it became one of Britain’s most beloved Christmas songs. Now known as “In the Bleak Midwinter,” it was voted the “greatest carol of all time” in a 2008 BBC survey of choral experts.
“In the Bleak Midwinter” began life as a poem, which Rossetti simply titled “A Christmas Carol.” When the hymnal paired her words with music, the poem took on a new identity in song – a phenomenon documented by literature researcher Emily McConkey. But it also became embedded into popular culture in nonmusical forms. “A Christmas Carol,” or parts of it, has appeared on Christmas cards, ornaments, tea towels, mugs, and other household items. It has inspired mystery novels and, more recently, became a recurring motif in the British television series “Peaky Blinders.”
As a scholar of Rossetti, I’ve long been fascinated by the afterlife of her poems in music. The Christina Rossetti in Music project, a database of musical adaptations that incorporates my work, now lists 185 versions of “In the Bleak Midwinter.” But before it could be set to music, “A Christmas Carol” had to make its way into print as a poem – and that wasn’t so easy. Though written by one of Britain’s mostly highly regarded poets, the poem failed to make its mark on British readers until Holst set it to music. Instead, it found its first, and most enthusiastic, audience in the United States.
Gustav Holst wrote the tune that made Christina Rossetti’s poem a beloved carol.Victorian music“A Christmas Carol” circulated during a carol revival in the United Kingdom. In December 1867, shortly before Rossetti started offering her poem to British magazine publishers, the century’s most influential collection of carols was published. Previously considered a folk tradition – and not considered fit for worship, given the revelry they were associated with and the mix of sacred and secular lyrics – carols were coming into vogue. And increasingly, they were finding their way into church.
At a time when women could not be ordained as preachers, writing carols and more formal hymns was a rare opportunity for women to shape the church. Barred from the pulpit themselves, female writers spoke from the pews, including Sarah Flower Adams – she wrote “Nearer, my God, to Thee” – and Cecil Frances Alexander, author of the beloved carol “Once in Royal David’s City.”
Rossetti, a devout Anglican and the author of a number of devotional poems, was among them. Although 21st-century readers may know her primarily through her poem “Goblin Market,” Rossetti’s religious poetry was well known to her contemporaries. By the 1870s, several of her poems had been reprinted in British religious anthologies and hymnals.
A bleak beginning“A Christmas Carol” opens with a vivid description of the harsh physical and spiritual landscape into which Jesus was born:
In the bleak mid-winter,
Frosty wind made moan;
Earth stood hard as iron,
Water like a stone
But it failed to impress George Grove, the new editor of Macmillan’s Magazine at the time. According to scholar Simon Humphries, in 1868 Rossetti sent “A Christmas Carol” to the British magazine, which had previously published her poetry. In what might now be regarded as one of the worst editorial decisions of the century, Grove rejected her submission. Rossetti eventually placed “A Christmas Carol” in another British journal, The People’s Magazine, in December 1873. But as luck would have it, that was the very last issue, and the poem was relegated to half a page, sandwiched between an essay on “The Life and Habits of Wild Animals” and a now-forgotten poem titled “The Red Cross Knight.” “A Christmas Carol” was all but ignored in the U.K. for over a decade.
The American receptionMeanwhile, a very different scenario was playing out in the U.S. In November 1871, Scribner’s Monthly dropped a hint about its Christmas issue, which would include a “little poem … sweet and clear and musical.” “A Christmas Carol” debuted two months later. Founded in 1870, Scribner’s Monthly sought to publish “the best authors,” making their work accessible and attractive to a mass audience through illustrations. The magazine paired Rossetti’s poem with a striking half-page illustration of the nativity by the well-known British illustrator John Leighton.
‘A Christmas Carol’ by Christina Rossetti, as first published in Scribner’s Monthly
in January 1872.
Wikimedia CommonsScribner’s dramatic presentation of Rossetti’s poem ensured that it would be noticed. It was reprinted in anthologies and newspapers, ultimately making The New York Times on Dec. 25, 1892.
The first mass merchandising of Rossetti’s poem also occurred in America. In 1880, an artist named Anne Morse incorporated its first and last stanzas into her prize-winning design for a Christmas card contest held by publisher Louis Prang, who popularized the tradition of sending Christmas cards in the U.S. The company published Morse’s card, distributing Rossetti’s words to homes across the country.
A mystery solvedBy the mid-1880s, however, “A Christmas Carol” was finally gaining traction in Britain. In 1885, it was included in a holiday-themed anthology titled “A Christmas Garland.” The Illustrated London News named Rosetti’s poem the best modern carol in the collection. Even more visibility came when “A Christmas Carol” was chosen for a collection of religious poetry compiled by influential editor Francis Palgrave in 1889.
In 2006, I discovered a letter in which Rossetti claimed not to have known about Scribner’s publication of “A Christmas Carol”: “I do not know how it happened,” she wrote, remembering only that the poem had come out in The People’s Magazine. At the time, I was unable to locate “A Christmas Carol” in The People’s Magazine, and assumed Rossetti’s memory was faulty. It wasn’t, as the long-sought copy of the 1873 issue now perched on my desk proves.
But Rossetti’s forgetting about Scribner’s Monthly – unaware of the role it played in bringing her work to American readers, and ultimately British ones too – is perhaps the strangest twist in the story of the “little poem” that, unbeknownst to her, would become her most popular work.
Maura Ives, Professor of English, Texas A&M University
This article is republished from The Conversation under a Creative Commons license. Read the original article.
How many Jewish mothers does it take to change a light bulb? The answer contains the secret to the eternal struggle between light and darkness. That’s what the Festival of Chanukah is all about. More than religious oppression, national self-determination, or military resistance, Chanukah celebrates the supremacy of illuminating wisdom over intellectual and spiritual obfuscation. That’s why the message of Chanukah couldn’t be more relevant for both Jews and non-Jews. If we want to bring reason and civility back to our society, it’s time to reclaim the light of clarity and cast off the black clouds of moral confusion. And it starts right now.
Top ten tips to reset and prosper as a leader and communications practitionerChristmas can feel like the light at the end of the tunnel, after a long slog through cold mornings and gloomy afternoons. The end-of-year weariness is temporarily offset by office parties, champagne, and high spirits. And with it comes the blessed relief that for the only time in the year, email in-boxes will grind to a halt– or at least, can be ignored guilt free… if only for a few days.
But festive cheer can be laced with an underlying sense of doom. We know what follows party season: the dreaded January return. The work put on hold will not disappear, fires yet to be put out still smoulder.
We’ve all been there– senior communications professionals are no exception. This is the time great numbers of us ask whether our company truly values us, or if there might be a better fit elsewhere– even if it means branching out alone into consultancy.
Perhaps you’re updating your CV or flicking through the job pages on LinkedIn. You could be thinking about how to refresh your technical skills, and finally trying to get your head around the new rules of digital PR and marketing.
Whatever your dilemma as a senior comms pro, whether you do decide to jump ship or not, there are some immediate steps you can take to get your mojo back and take control of 2023.
Take this time to reflect
If you’re experiencing overwhelm and low motivation, or your confidence has taken a hit, fear not: you are not alone. Many of us take a mental pause this time of year. The thoughts repressed all year by the relentless treadmill of the day-to-day can start to emerge; existential questions about career and life choices bubble up.
Am I where I thought I would be this time last year? Am I succeeding? What will be my focus for the new year? What are my goals and how can I reach them? Am I healthy… Am I happy?!
For some, this is a time of possibility. Perhaps you have big plans and your mind is whirring with ideas of how to achieve them. Maybe you know where your growth areas are and you’re looking for opportunities to upskill.
Or, maybe the time spent with your family this festive season is a reminder that the balance is not quite right. Your relationships are strained and something’s got to give.
Take stock of how to become the leader that you want to be for ‘23
Here’s how:
- Recognise your own agency. You are where you are as a result of your own choices, and you can choose to do things differently. Whether that is a complete change of career or a simple shift in mindset, try to look at your situation with fresh eyes.
- Assess your support network. Do you have friends and colleagues that you can rely on? A mentor and/or coach that can help you to see new paths or perspectives, and help you to plan the way ahead?
- Get back to basics. When did you last consider your values? What success looks like? What makes you happy? Make some time over the holidays to dig deep and work out what it is you really want.
- Visualise your future. Imagine you’ve had the most amazing 2023. You’re sitting down with a friend and telling them all about your successes and achievements. What were they? What were the steps that helped you to achieve them? What was the game-changing moment/decision/action?
- Decide now, that you will make time for your future, and invest in yourself. This will mean different things to different people. It could mean carving out time for self-care, signing up to a course, committing to finding a new job in the next 3 months, or engaging a coach to keep you on track. What’s important is that you decide.
Together with assessing where you are in your career, this is also a good time to take stock of your knowledge and understanding of communications in the digital era. Are you and the team you lead seizing the new opportunities available to have an impact, or could your approach to communications benefit from a refresh?
Step up as a communications practitioner
As a communications leader, you know the ‘game’ has changed dramatically from when you first started out in your career. Traditional print and broadcast media are not as trusted as they once were.
So why focus so much effort on communicating via intermediaries your audience either distrusts or, in increasing numbers, has tuned out? It makes no sense, especially in a crowded media landscape in which audiences have a seemingly infinite number of choices on where to receive their information.
You’ve probably spent a fair chunk of 2022 trying different approaches on social media, dipping your toes into the podcast pool, and even some good old-fashioned press releases and media pitches… and everything in between! But it doesn’t seem to move the needle.
You need your organisation to gain more profile, but it is increasingly hard not to get drowned out by competitors. So how do you gain more visibility with the audiences that are important to you?
Start by making sure you focus on thought leadership and community building. Stop chasing your audience but instead create the platforms to bring them to you.
Become a (better) communications guru in ‘23
Here’s how:
- Build better platforms: review your organisation’s purpose, vision, value, and mission so you can align all communications programmes around what is most important.
- Prime your audience: check that you have segmented your audiences, understand them and try to think like them– so you can fix their problems.
- Market positioning: try to identify your organisation’s place in the industry, what you mean to accomplish, how you will do so, and when.
- Content audit: review your content strategy, communications strategy, marketing strategy, assets, content calendar, target audience, and process workflow.
- Thought leadership & community building: Create a content programme to enable your organisation to be a more influential voice for your industry. Cultivate your own industry community so that your business becomes the industry’s ‘watering hole.’
COAUTHOR: Nick O’Hara has more than 20 years’ experience in strategic communications, public affairs, and PR, having worked in senior roles for a number of highly respected organisations in both the public and private sectors. He is a former UK civil servant with intimate knowledge of Westminster and Whitehall, who has advised cabinet ministers and permanent secretaries. Throughout his career, he has specialised in designing and implementing external communications strategies, advising senior executives on political, policy and communications issues. In 2022 he co-founded Renovata—a global strategic communications and thought leadership consultancy—because he wanted to empower visionaries to make their communities, their industry, and the world better. He now focuses on working with leaders in the private, public and non-profit sectors to develop their purpose and improve how they communicate it.
Troy Bickham, Texas A&M University
Why, every Christmas, do so many people endure the mess of dried pine needles, the risk of a fire hazard, and impossibly tangled strings of lights?
Strapping a fir tree to the hood of my car and worrying about the strength of the twine, I sometimes wonder if I should just buy an artificial tree and do away with all the hassle. Then my inner historian scolds me – I have to remind myself that I’m taking part in one of the world’s oldest religious traditions. To give up the tree would be to give up a ritual that predates Christmas itself.
A symbol of life in a time of darknessAlmost all agrarian societies independently venerated the Sun in their pantheon of gods at one time or another – there was the Sol of the Norse, the Aztec Huitzilopochtli, and the Greek Helios.
The solstices, when the Sun is at its highest and lowest points in the sky, were major events. The winter solstice, when the sky is its darkest, has been a notable day of celebration in agrarian societies throughout human history. The Persian Shab-e Yalda, Dongzhi in China, and the North American Hopi Soyal all independently mark the occasion.
The favored décor for ancient winter solstices? Evergreen plants.
Whether as palm branches gathered in Egypt in the celebration of Ra or wreaths for the Roman feast of Saturnalia, evergreens have long served as symbols of the perseverance of life during the bleakness of winter, and the promise of the Sun’s return.
Christmas slowly emergesChristmas came much later. The date was not fixed on liturgical calendars until centuries after Jesus’ birth, and the English word Christmas – an abbreviation of “Christ’s Mass” – would not appear until over 1,000 years after the original event.
While Dec. 25 was ostensibly a Christian holiday, many Europeans simply carried over traditions from winter solstice celebrations, which were notoriously raucous affairs. For example, the 12 days of Christmas commemorated in the popular carol actually originated in ancient Germanic Yule celebrations.
The continued use of evergreens, most notably the Christmas tree, is the most visible remnant of those ancient solstice celebrations. Although Ernst Anschütz’s well-known 1824 carol dedicated to the tree is translated into English as “O Christmas Tree,” the title of the original German tune is simply “Tannenbaum,” meaning fir tree. There is no reference to Christmas in the carol, which Anschütz based on a much older Silesian folk love song. In keeping with old solstice celebrations, the song praises the tree’s faithful hardiness during the dark and cold winter.
Bacchanal backlashSixteenth-century German Protestants, eager to remove the iconography and relics of the Roman Catholic Church, gave the Christmas tree a huge boost when they used it to replace Nativity scenes. The religious reformer Martin Luther supposedly adopted the practice and added candles.
German Protestants sought to replace ornate Nativity scenes with the simpler tree.
Wikimedia CommonsBut a century later, the English Puritans frowned upon the disorderly holiday for lacking biblical legitimacy. They banned it in the 1650s, with soldiers patrolling London’s streets looking for anyone daring to celebrate the day. Puritan colonists in Massachusetts did the same, fining “whosoever shall be found observing Christmas or the like, either by forbearing of labor, feasting, or any other way.”
German immigration to the American colonies ensured that the practice of trees would take root in the New World. Benjamin Franklin estimated that at least one-third of Pennsylvania’s white population was German before the American Revolution. Yet, the German tradition of the Christmas tree blossomed in the United States largely due to Britain’s German royal lineage.
Taking a cue from the queenSince 1701, English kings had been forbidden from becoming or marrying Catholics. Germany, which was made up of a patchwork of kingdoms, had eligible Protestant princes and princesses to spare. Many British royals privately maintained the familiar custom of a Christmas tree, but Queen Victoria – who had a German mother as well as a German grandmother on her father’s side – made the practice public and fashionable. Victoria’s style of rule both reflected and shaped the outwardly stern, family-centered morality that dominated middle-class life during the era. In the 1840s, Christmas became the target of reformers like novelist Charles Dickens, who sought to transform the raucous celebrations of the largely sidelined holiday into a family day in which the people of the rapidly industrialized nation could relax, rejoice and give thanks.
His 1843 novella, “A Christmas Carol,” in which the miserly Ebenezer Scrooge found redemption by embracing Dickens’ prescriptions for the holiday, was a hit with the public. While the evergreen décor is evident in the hand-colored illustrations Dickens specially commissioned for the book, there are no Christmas trees in those pictures.
After the London Illustrated News published an image of Queen Victoria’s tree, the public eagerly sought to mimic the tradition.
Wikimedia Commons
Victoria added the fir tree to family celebrations five years later. Although Christmas trees had been part of private royal celebrations for decades, an 1848 issue of the London Illustrated News depicted Victoria with her German husband and children decorating one as a family at Windsor Castle. The cultural impact was almost instantaneous. Christmas trees started appearing in homes throughout England, its colonies, and the rest of the English-speaking world. Dickens followed with his short story “A Christmas Tree” two years later.
Adopting the tradition in AmericaDuring this period, America’s middle classes generally embraced all things Victorian, from architecture to moral reform societies.
Sarah Hale, the author most famous for her children’s poem “Mary had a Little Lamb,” used her position as editor of the best-selling magazine Godey’s Ladies Book to advance a reformist agenda that included the abolition of slavery and the creation of holidays that promoted pious family values. The adoption of Thanksgiving as a national holiday in 1863 was perhaps her most lasting achievement.
An engraving of Queen Victoria’s tree in Godey’s Ladies Book popularized Christmas trees in the U.S.
Godey’s Lady’s Book
It is closely followed by the Christmas tree.
While trees sporadically adorned the homes of German immigrants in the U.S., it became a mainstream middle-class practice when, in 1850, Godey’s published an engraving of Victoria and her Christmas tree. A supporter of Dickens and the movement to reinvent Christmas, Hale helped to popularize the family Christmas tree across the pond.
Only in 1870 did the United States recognize Christmas as a federal holiday. The practice of erecting public Christmas trees emerged in the U.S. in the 20th century. In 1923, the first one appeared on the White House’s South Lawn. During the Great Depression, famous sites such as New York’s Rockefeller Center began erecting increasingly larger trees.
A Christmas tree was erected on the White House South Lawn for the first time in 1923.
Library of CongressChristmas trees go globalAs both American and British cultures extended their influence around the world, Christmas trees started to appear in communal spaces even in countries that are not predominately Christian. Shopping districts in Dubai, United Arab Emirates, Hong Kong and Tokyo now regularly erect trees.
The modern Christmas tree is a universal symbol that carries meanings both religious and secular. Adorned with lights, they promote hope and offer brightness in literally the darkest time of year for half of the world. In that sense, the modern Christmas tree has come full circle.
Troy Bickham, Professor of History, Texas A&M University
This article is republished from The Conversation under a Creative Commons license. Read the original article.
This is a story of how I went from being pals with a friend from Texas to a few years later sharing stages with him and his band across the U.S. during a major summer heavy metal travelling tour. The story is mostly of the events that led up to the tour, as well as some of the shenanigans we got up to during the tour.
When most people think about budgeting, they think about restricting their spending and living a life of austerity. However, this need not be the case! A well-crafted budget can actually help you save more money than ever before – you just need to know how to refine it. This blog post will discuss some tips on how to do just that. So read on and learn how to create a budget that will help you achieve your financial goals!
1) Know Your GoalsThe first part of creating an optimal budget is to determine what your financial goals are. Are you wanting to pay off debt quickly? Are you saving for a home or car purchase, a vacation, retirement, or something else? Determining what your end goal is will help you create reasonable and achievable steps in order to get there. Also, consider what kind of timeframe you have to reach your goals. Setting a deadline will help you stay on track and motivated to save money in order to achieve financial success.
2) Track Your SpendingIt can be difficult to know where your money is going if you do not track it. Start by writing down all of your expenses for a month, including fixed and variable costs like rent/mortgage payments, utilities, food and toiletries, entertainment, car/public transportation costs, etc. It may also be beneficial to break down the expenses into categories like groceries or dining out so that you can determine how much you are spending each month in each area.
By tracking your spending this way, it becomes easier to find opportunities for budget cuts. You may find that you are spending more than you should on one type of expense, or that there is a place where you can reduce your monthly expenses. Getting an understanding of where your money is going will help you to create an optimal budget.
3) Create a BudgetOnce you have determined your financial goals and tracked your spending, it’s time to start crafting a budget. As you do this, remember to be realistic with what money is available to use each month and factor in any fixed costs like rent/mortgage payments and utilities that cannot be changed. Additionally, remember to set aside some money each month for emergencies and unplanned purchases. It could also help to read Primerica Reviews to perhaps get a better deal on insurance, for example.
When creating the budget, use the 50/30/20 rule as a guide. This means that 50% of your income should go to needs, 30% should go to wants, and 20% should go to savings and debt repayment. Adjust this ratio if needed in order to meet your personal financial goals while still allowing yourself some wiggle room for entertainment or other optional expenses.
4) Set Up Automatic PaymentsOnce you have created a budget, set up automatic payments if possible so that you can make sure you are sticking with the budget without having to worry about manually making payments each month. This will also help to ensure that no bills get missed due to forgetfulness or lack of time.
In addition, consider setting up automatic transfers from your checking account to your savings account. This will allow you to save money without having to think about it and ensure that you are on track towards reaching your financial goals.
In conclusion, budgeting can be a powerful tool to help you save money and reach your financial goals. By following the tips outlined in this blog post, you should have no problem creating an optimal budget that works for your individual needs.
This is from my Couch Potato Chronicles column Circa 2000 AD.
We’re having the worst snowstorm of the season so far as I sit here and write these words. I’ve shovelled twice and will doubtless be shovelling more. According to The Weather Channel, this storm is called a Colorado Low. Not very creative but I have always liked the word Colorado. It forms in the lee of the Rockies and blows straight from there to Newfoundland. It’s after eleven and the sky outside my window is an iridescent greyish orange. When you look up into the trees, away from the neighbouring houses and pretty lights, there’s a timelessness to the way the barren branches blow around in a seemingly aimless pattern. The cold feels even colder when you look into that grey-orange sky. There’s a great deal of solace in knowing you’re fortunate enough not to have to be out in weather like this. Its more than enough to make you count your blessings.
Because Christmas comes on a Monday this year, this is my official Christmas column. I usually don’t write this column until Thursday or Friday. Maybe it’s the Colorado Low that’s put me in the mood. Or maybe it’s just the fact that the later I stay up and shovel snow, the easier it will be to dig myself out in the morning when I have to go to a meeting at some hotel up in the north part of the city.
The Vinyl Cafe–A True Christmas TreasureThis past Saturday, the Wife and I listened to The Vinyl Cafe on CBC radio on Saturday, and it filled us both with a real sense of Christmas.
It also gave me something of an insight into the nature of Christmas itself. Stuart McLean, the host of The Vinyl Cafe is a brilliant Canadian writer, and during the show, he read a couple of his stories. One was about his first Christmas away from home and the other was about this family he invented who live somewhere in the suburbs of Oshawa, Ontario.
These stories were both quite moving in the simplicity of their prose and the honest delivery of the reader. They made you conjure up in your own mind, memories of Christmases past, and the potent combination of well-written pieces of Canadiana and the images that came dancing through my head brought tears of nostalgic joy to my eyes. The Wife sat on a wooden stool and I leaned on the kitchen counter, eating one of those little Maroc oranges that are so plentiful at this time of year. And though we were there together, we were both adrift in our own private memories of Christmas past.
Mine happened to take me back to the time when I was about eleven or twelve and our rather gigantic family would gather at our house in Fort Erie for the holidays. They would travel from as far away as New Jersey, California and Vancouver just to sit around and drink egg nog and Coca-Cola laced with Canadian Club and remind you how big you were getting. In my memories, it wasn’t about the opening of presents on Christmas day although one year, my Uncle Harold from New Jersey brought me a burgundy coloured Schwinn roadster with balloon tires and hand brakes. I loved that bike with a passion that would be considered kinky in most civilized countries.
Everybody who came into the store took a few minutes out of their busy Christmas Eve day to have a pleasant chat and exchange seasons greetings.
No, Christmas back then was really all about having people around you whom you knew and loved and felt really safe with. It was about shooting the breeze over nothing at all and singing along with Bing Crosby’s ultra mellow version of White Christmas and watching your dad carve the big turkey while your uncles all told off colour jokes and your aunts would give them a whack for their trouble. It was about sitting around with your cousin Tony, who was a sailor in the merchant marine, and hearing stories of all the great ports of call he visited. It was about learning to play poker with your cousin Pete and losing the ten dollars your Aunt Frannie gave you in the process. It was about going to Ineson’s store and picking up eggs for the homemade eggnog your aunts took turns whipping up. Mrs. Ineson would give you a mug of hot chocolate to drink and a cookie to munch on while you were there. Everybody who came into the store took a few minutes out of their busy Christmas Eve day to have a pleasant chat and exchange seasons greetings. It was about your cousin Lynn, the grade 6 teacher, who would gather all the young kids around on the living room floor and read ‘The Night Before Christmas’ in that enchanted voice that really good teachers all seem to have.
If you close your eyes for a moment, at any time around Christmas, these memories can flood back into your own consciousness, with no more stimulation than the smell of a Scotch pine tree or the sound of Christmas carol in some store. And it will probably occur to you as it did to me, listening to Stuart McLean, that Christmas in the present is mostly about Christmas in the past.
As I grow older, my memories move along in time. But they are always there. And besides being with my loved ones, they are the very best part of Christmas for me. The tiny perfect part that remains undisturbed by all the commotion and distraction which typically surrounds the holiday season.
I wish you all the happiest of holidays and all the joy the season has to offer. Get a little rest and relaxation. You’ve earned it.
SOME OF MY FAVOURITE HOLIDAY MOVIESThis list will be a little obvious to most, but what the hell, it’s kind of an obvious time of year.
- SCROOGED With Bill Murray and Carol Kane
- A CHRISTMAS CAROL With Alastair Sim
- A CHRISTMAS CAROL With George C. Scott
- THE PREACHER’S WIFE With Denzel Washington
- THE BISHOPS WIFE With Cary Grant
- A CHRISTMAS STORY With Darren McGavin
- WHITE CHRISTMAS With Bing Crosby and Danny Kaye
- CHRISTMAS IN CONNECTICUT With Barbara Stanwick
- HOLIDAY INN With Fred Astaire and Bing Crosby
- THE SANTA CLAUSE With Tim Allen
- IT’S A WONDERFUL LIFE With Jimmy Stewart
- HOME FOR THE HOLIDAYS With Holly Hunter
- SANTA CLAUS–THE MOVIE With Dudley Moore
- MIRACLE ON THIRTY-FORTH STREET With Edmund Gwynne and a very young Natalie Wood
- MYSTERY ALASKA Not a real Christmas movie, but still worth watching at this time of year
In my daily work, I speak with, and write for an audience that is very familiar, and -I hope- convinced of the value that partnerships bring to the table. However, in the larger context, it is very common to see references to getting rid of “the middleman” and “going directly to the manufacturer”. These messages predicate price savings that rarely materialize, on the basis that the layers in a value chain between the manufacturer and the consumer add no value whatsoever, and all they do is add up to the cost, collecting some type of an underserved fee. This article is from the point of view of someone who has worked for years for companies that have leveraged external partners to make it possible for their businesses to reach new heights, and offer a better experience for their customers.
WHEN THINGS WORK, COMPLEXITIES ARE IGNOREDThis indicates that about 70% of the global economy flows indirectly, and for good reason. Each one of the participants adds value. But how is value added? Why do we need these intermediaries?
In today’s complex business environment, there is almost no product or service that is made or delivered end-to-end, by one single company. There is always an intricate network of supply-chain elements and partnerships of sometimes completely independent companies involved. With the exception of the few of us who are deeply wading in the waters of partner ecosystems, these complexities tend to be ignored.
To make things worse, not even in some partner-friendly companies is everyone adequately acquainted with their own delivery models. More than a few times, I have found myself briefing an executive about the differences between their own Value Added Resellers and Agents.
Very often, these relationships are also, more than simplified, dumbed down. They are sometimes wrongly classified like a “supplier” or even worse, called “the middle man”, as if for some inherited privilege they have earned the right to collect some type of tax that they don’t really deserve.
THE MIDDLEMAN IS THERE FOR A REASONIn reality, many companies rely on partnerships to deliver their products to the market, and their partners are an integral part of their Go-To-Market strategy. In today’s world, it is a rare find a company that is capable to deliver its product or services all the way from the source, to the hands of the customer. Along this journey, several companies -or “partners”- may perform services, attach other products, etc. adding value to the final product that lands at the customer. It is from this journey and the several steps of value-add that the concept of the value chain stems from, and the product or service that is delivered to the customer is experienced through its Joint Value Proposition.
While these concepts are omnipresent in the tech industry, they are all over our economy as well. Two of the most noticeable ones are the Distribution Channel and the Service Delivery Partners. As for the first one, we see it everywhere, from the grocery store, the car dealership, or our trusted IT gal. For example, it is impossible -or not cost-effective- for car manufacturers to set up showrooms in every town, so they rely on entrepreneurs who are willing to enter in this business. In a similar way, growers and other foodstuff producers cannot afford to go to every town to sell their goods, so they engage in the distribution network that brings those goods to your local grocery store.
We must recognize the value that each of these partners offers for the consumer. Yes, they take a portion of the profits as compensation for their services, but they also add value to the product or service. For example, the local dealership makes it easy to get there, they offer financing (they bring together the automobile, and a financial product, the loan), and they can also service your car. In the case of the grocery store, besides making it really convenient to buy, with extended business hours, refrigeration, and now even home delivery, they are also an “aggregator”, allowing us to buy apples, milk, and honey, without having to visit the orchard, the dairy farmer, and the beekeeper.
A Service Delivery Partner can be a key player in the value chain, especially if the product or service requires installation, servicing, or any form of customization. They can be as simple as the independent contractor that may install the carpets that you bought at the big home-improvement store, or as complex as Microsoft’s partner network, where partners specialize in specific technologies. There is a huge difference in value between the carpet just delivered to your house in a roll, vs. actually being able to step on it. How much more value does that have in terms of your ability to enjoy the product?
IS A PARTNER RELATIONSHIP RIGHT FOR YOU?The way we experience a product or service is the result of all the value transactions that occur throughout the value chain, before they reach us. Some of these value transactions and the players involved, have evolved over time, filling a need. Others have been created intentionally, by design. This is where some companies have the opportunity to differentiate themselves from others by designing value chains that complement each other, delivering value to their customers. Across the board, some of the benefits of working with partners, instead of building every single aspect of the business, are:
Let a specialist deal with getting your product to the customer, the way the customer wants it. Partners have been doing what they do, for years. This makes them experts at it, and they can guarantee quality in a consistent manner.
Reduce the overall cost for the customer. Because of the specialization that partners may have developed, they are also in the position to perform the services required at a fraction of the cost that you would be able to do them in-house. (Yes! Partners can actually make things cheaper!).
Limit your exposure, adjust to sales volumes. Partnerships generally operate on a variable cost basis. This means that during times when business is slow, you will not have to pay them that much.
Be agile to scale. In the opposite scenario to the above and in the same way that a partner can scale down when business is slow, they can also quickly ramp up their services when business is booming.
CHOOSE PARTNERS WITH THE RIGHT CAPABILITIESWhen considering the way your product or service should be experienced, your differentiated value proposition. What does it look like? Can you make it happen? From the source to the end? What are you missing?
Instead of creating all the necessary parts to build your ideal differentiated value proposition, one option may be to partner with the right company, to complete your vision, and in this case, create a Joint Value Proposition. What kind of partner would you need to complement the value that you create?
Conversely, Is your business in the channel? Are you a reseller? An affiliates seller? A retailer? It is just as important in this scenario to do the exercise and be able to articulate what value you add. Do you make the customer experience better? Do you provide delivery? Help with selection? Install? Do you provide some kind of support afterwards?
PARTNERSHIPS ARE FOR THE LONG RUN, MAKE THE RIGHT PROMISESPartnership relationships can be complex though, and they require a lot of forethought. Companies partnering remain independent and is important to align incentives in order to make the partnership sail smoother and put in place a contractual framework that supports the partnership. Talking to a specialist in this area can pay off many times over the years.
As someone in business, instead of “cutting the middleman”, it may be wiser to seek it out and have someone to lean on.
I had the great honour of recording a conversation with Dr. Raj Persaud, Harley Street Psychiatrist and former anchor for BBC Radio’s “All in the Mind”. The conversation was wide-ranging and some of the questions we covered included:
- Using music to change your mood
- Language and music
- The importance of psychological safety
- Creativity and the advocacy of ideas
- The importance of incubation for innovation
- The chemistry of teams
- Music, business, and emotional intelligence
Listen to the dialogue between Raj and Peter here:
Following is a chapter in my forthcoming non-fiction book That Think You Do. The book is based on a series of blog posts I wrote back in the mid-to-late-2000s for a California-based company. The editor at my new publishing house found the posts and thought they would make an excellent series of books. The posts/chapters are based on my research in a variety of fields – neuroscience, anthropology, sociology, psychology, linguistics, … – and were quite popular in their day.
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A fascinating piece of social research has made it to my desk. It deals with males’ success rate with females in typical mating situations.
To readers outside of social anthropology, this means “What can guys do to make sure girls notice them in bars, at clubs, in the mall, in the hall, in the cafeteria, at the dance, …?”
The research points out one of those things that’s obvious. So obvious, one might ask, “Somebody had to do research on this?” Well, yes. Because when you think about it, it’s not what most guys do in typical mating situations and that’s probably why few males have the kind of success they want.
The Trick IsBe a little different from your mates, your buddies, your pals, whatever you want to call them, when you go out as a group. Or if you’re not going out as a group, be a little different than most other guys when you go out where other males will be. For example, wear flashy suspenders with bright accessories or otherwise drab, run-of-the-mill clothing. Or a different kind of hat. Or a clown nose. The trick is to get women to look, even for a second because that one second puts you one second ahead of the…umm…competition.
Women may not flock to you and they will, generally, be more receptive should you approach them.
It Works BecauseIt turns out that women of all ages cue to the different in mating situations. Neuroscience uses the term “difference sorters” for this and it means that, given one-hundred things that are all the same and only one thing among those hundred that are different, females as a group will devote attention to the one different thing before they’ll pay attention to any one of the one-hundred similar things. Evolution has designed them to look for the one perfect jaw and good teeth (for example) among all the other jaws and teeth because that one perfect jaw and good teeth meant a good hunter, good provider, and better genetic material for her offspring (than the hundred other fellows with common jaws and teeth), meaning her genes had a better than average chance of survival, too. Those evolutionary factors are still hard at work even though the pampas or forest or mountains have been replaced by malls, dance halls, cafeterias, offices, and so on.
So if you’re just a little different – not a lot different – females will notice you and make a mental note that you’re interesting. Specifically, they will note that you’re more interesting than the other males around you.
And guys, in case you haven’t figured it out yet, being interesting works really well when it comes to attracting females. Nice cars, big bankroll, great job, expensive clothes, great bling, these are all good things too, no question about it.
Of course, they’re good because they’re interesting. Especially when your competition doesn’t have them. Such things make you…umm…different.
Here’s What You Can’t DoDifferent is nice and it has to be different within certain boundaries. You can’t land your hovercraft in the company parking lot and expect to get the kind of attention you want. You’ll get attention, I’m sure, simply not the kind you want from females you’d want interested in you.
You can’t wear gold like Mr. T in his heyday if you’re going to a friend’s moving party.
Be different, yes, but be different within the setting’s limits. Stand out enough to be seen, not stared at.
You’ll do fine.
____________________
I would appreciate both your comments below and hearing from you as I am seeking testimonials, endorsements, reviews, back cover copy, etc., to help promote my book following release. Please reach out to me directly if you’re interested in receiving an Advance Readers’ Copy.
Thank you!
Joseph
Sharing is Caring.It is a basic premise that we learn throughout life. But the truth is it has exponential effects on us and those we help. There are physiological and emotional benefits to giving back. We benefit even if we aren’t aware of the impact giving has on our health.
As a former special education teacher and pediatric nurse, I have focused my life on giving back to children in need. And in the community, I have been blessed to support ventures to give back to families of special needs children in a bigger way. When I started giving back magical shifts happened in my productivity, confidence, and courage. At the time I had no idea that giving back freed me from stress and cleared space for me to proceed in my healing journey.
One of the basic principles I teach and thrive on is “Kindness is essential towards others and yourself.” And this simple premise means giving to others is a huge part of my life.
But it also helped me realize and foster kindness towards myself through self-love, mindfulness, and writing. And I am grateful that I can share these principles with children, families, and the community.
My passion for giving began 22 years ago as a special education teacher. I was on a journey to understand the link between physical illness, disability, and mental health. I started the journey inspired by the health challenges of a very special boy named Alfonso. At the time I had no idea that his story and my career change would give me the courage to be vulnerable and heal from my child abuse and understand my learning disabilities on a different level.
Alfoso was a beautiful green-eyed and blond-haired little boy who suddenly lost his speech and experienced significant developmental delays. He faced these delays after a mosquito bite that caused encephalitis, seizure disorder, and significant learning disabilities. Alfonso was one of my most precious yet challenging students in my brief special education career. Caring for him fueled my curiosity and courage to understand the link between illness, disease, and disability. And I know now he finally gave me the courage to go to my true calling and become a nurse. Several years later, I cared for Alfonso on many occasions in the Emergency room. I reunited with his mom Elsa and learned about her efforts to support children and families with special needs children to access medical care and special needs services from infancy to adulthood.
And my passion for giving grew as I became a member of the Board of Trustees for Miami Family Friends years ago. We work together creating events for families focused on education, health, empowerment, and nurturing. We have created events to help parents and children thrive through the hardships of disabilities. We continue to launch new projects based on community needs. We invite any parents and families with special needs children to our events absolutely Free. Our next event is a Holiday party on December 2, 2022.
I know that giving back has helped me thrive in so many ways. And expanded my potential in life and career through the physiological and psychological benefits that lie under the surface of giving.
I give because I love to but knowing that my kindness benefits everyone brings peace of mind and body.
During covid 19, I launched a little project on my own to give me the courage to continue to heal. Our non-profit had limited events due to the pandemic but I had a deep need to continue giving. Giving back even during a lockdown pushed me along in my healing journey. As I worked through my challenges and focused on progress while I used inspiration to guide my giving. I realized at the time the power of art, reading, mindfulness, baking, and play in mental health and wellness. And as I used these tools for myself, I became inspired by the hardships of others and began giving to support. I supported families and children through donations I collected to create sensory mood boxes. Over the years, I gave boxes to individuals or families. The family boxes were the most fun. I incorporated special gifts for everyone from infants, children to parents. And gave it to families facing hardships like illness or death.
During this time of giving and healing, I focused on others, and my career and rested from writing. But I am grateful for everything I learned on this journey and the opportunities to share with the community. And I am confident 2023 will bring many more opportunities to give to others and spread love. I hope you find ways to give back to the community. And in that giving, I hope you find the blessings the gift of kindness brings into your life.
There are six basic human fears that we all have and that show up at different times and in different degrees.
This is well documented in the Epilogue of the #2 personal development best seller for the last 100 years, Napoleon Hill’s Think & Grow Rich!
If this is so, then is it even possible to …
- change them? NO
- remove them? NO
- ignore them? NO
- replace them? YES
- embrace them? YES
What are they?
Fear of …
- Poverty
- Death
- Old age
- Illness
- Criticism
- Loss of love
With only ONE conscious thought at a time (not counting automatic subconscious dialogues or monkey chatter) so … WHICH prevails?
The one we Say, prevails! The only thing humans’ control is “what we think!” That’s it!
So being an agile thinker, the ability to be objective about our views leaving us able to choose other views that may better serve us, is vital and takes practice. And it takes time and a willingness.
You will hear people say “change your beliefs” to eradicate fear.
Impossible to change the same energy for the same energy.
You will hear people say, reshape them or reprogram that same fear or belief. Also, not possible.
Ignore them people say? We can for a while, however, FEARS are stronger than ‘will,’ depending on our circumstance.
Replace them, you can. One must however, ‘mimic’ the process that gave us the fear, to create the new belief in faith (it’s opposite). [My work.]
Embrace them? What we resist, persists. If we do not embrace, they hover over every situation. Look at them and learn from them is a good first step.
Resisting the fear of poverty diminishes self-love and self-worth. You either are afraid of poverty or you believe you deserve to feed yourself by investing IN yourself. Only one prevails.
My hybrid personal business development program, now in its sixteenth year, marries Think & Grow Rich, Seven Universal Laws, Twelve Principles of Achievement, along with visualization, meditation, and coaching techniques to yield high performance and consistent achievement over time.
We all encounter some form of chaos in our daily routine from time to time: Unexpected work requests; text messages or emails when you feel you have no time to reply; annoying notifications on your phone. And on and on and on. So, Zen Sammich explores how to deal with this kind of day-to-day chaos without getting stressed out or frustrated.
Visit zensammich.com/washi if you would like to help the show by purchasing some of the traditional Japanese, handmade paper that my wife and I make for a living. We do special order projects all the time. Just let us know what you would like. Or, consider making a one-time donation through Red Circle (click the link) or becoming a supporter of Zen Sammich for as little as $3 at patreon.com/zensammich (direct link not available, please copy and paste the URL). If you become a patron, I will send you a personalized, handmade (on traditional Japanese paper) postcard from the show and give you a shoutout on a future episode. Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/zen-sammich/donations.
With the balanced mix of retro and modern, emerging artist HADEE. delivers the 80s movie soundtrack we never knew we needed with his debut single, “4AM”. Released on April 22nd, 2022, this first track of many explores the concept of letting all inhibitions go despite whatever could possibly go wrong. “4AM” is available on all streaming and video platforms.
When asked why he chose to write a song with said themes in mind, HADEE. stated, “I find that too many give in to overthinking rather than embracing spontaneity. Life presents itself as endless crossroads. Knowing when to go is what you have to decide. If you take too long, you might just miss your ride.”
Most of us would be a hypocrite to say we are not guilty of that system of thinking. With that being said, this is the point HADEE. lyrically combats in ‘4AM’. While the argument could be made that the majority of us no longer find drive in the long-term chase, rather falling for lust and immediate satisfaction, he shows consideration to the latter.
“To me, regret is the one thing that can eat you alive far after you die. Any other fear is simply a mortal construct,” HADEE. states. In this context, the south Florida musician sides with spontaneity and welcomes all doors it may open.
When asked about his musical influences, the solo artist gave a wide list ranging from 80s synthpop likened to Billy Idol, 70s/80s Bowie eras, a touch of classic film noir, finished off with a balanced mix of modernity such as The Killers, Two Door Cinema Club, Young The Giant, and Walk The Moon to name a few.
In his first single “4AM”, his intention was for the listener to feel the beauty that prequels the pain we all experience even in our best relationships. Similar to the numbing shot of adrenaline you feel when you tear something, love has a warm way of easing you in. It tells you, “I’m here, but what follows may sometimes hurt.” Each of us do it for different reasons, yet the commonality we find at the end stands true for everyone: We learn more about who we really are.
Showcasing independent artists delivering the best music on the planet PLUS the stories behind it all. Sit back. Listen. Enjoy!
The positive state of mind that brings a deep feeling of appreciation for everyday living.Through gratitude, we cultivate the ability to look at life through the lenses of abundance, seeing the positives instead of defaulting to negativity.
“Grateful thinking” is a powerful practice that opens the door to a more joyful and fulfilling life.
Decades of scientific research and, more recently, findings in the field of social science, show that the practice and embodiment of an attitude for gratitude can be life-changing. Being grateful, and sharing gratitude, is proven to positively support greater health, as it heightens the feeling of connection, trust, and awareness.
Gratitude increases happiness, strengthens the immune system, regulates sleeping patterns, enhances social relationships, and boosts performance at work.
The practice of gratitude is a worthwhile pursuit with many long-term happy returns. Gratitude is amongst the many gifts that mindfulness practice can offer. As we tune in and quieten the mind, we consciously move the focus on the sensations that arise as we recall images of things and people that enrich our lives in many ways and at different levels.
Whatever our individual troubles and challenges may be, it’s important to pause every now and then to appreciate all that we have, on every level.
–Shakti Gawain
Robert Emmons, Ph.D., professor of psychology at the University of California, and one of the world’s leading experts on the science of gratitude, writes that “…gratitude is one of the most neglected emotions and one of the most underestimated of virtues…”(The Psychology of Gratitude)
How does the state of gratefulness awareness support well-being? Through a mental process known as “Positive Recall“, that strengthens the regions of the brain associated with reward, trust, and pleasure which accentuate feelings of happiness, optimism, and positive emotion. When we express gratitude, the brain releases dopamine and serotonin, two hormones that make us feel lighter and happier.
You will agree that there is more to Gratitude than meets the eye.
Here’s to how to start tuning into gratitude, every day. Whether you are at home or at work, make time for a Gratitude Ritual.
𝑯𝒂𝒑𝒑𝒊𝒏𝒆𝒔𝒔 𝒃𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒌: 5 𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒖𝒕𝒆𝒔 𝒐𝒇 𝑮𝒓𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒕𝒖𝒅𝒆.
Carve five minutes out of your busy daily schedule.
Find a comfortable place where you can sit away from distractions.
Start by grounding yourself in the moment through conscious breathing.
Then, think of 10 things you are grateful for today. Keep a journal for them. Revisit the notes to strengthen the practice as you continue offering gratitude to yourself and those around you.
Creating and reinforcing the habit of gratitude within your Team is a key dimension of a culture of recognition where effort, at the individual and collective levels, is rewarded each step of the people journey, resulting in long-term company growth and sustainability.
Share the practice with your people. You may want to start your weekly meetings by opening with twenty minutes dedicated to celebrating and acknowledging the positives, inviting each person in the Team to contribute, by verbalising three things they are grateful for. The space you intentionally make for this exploration, will not only enhance the feelings of connection, but will also enable people to maintain a positive outlook that is receptive of new ideas, which can strengthen collaborative decision-making as the meeting wraps up with everyone being offered the opportunity to take an active part in it.
“Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues but the parent of all others.” ~Cicero
If you are interested in exploring more, you will find some useful resources in the links that follow:
Mindful: The Science of Gratitude
HBR: Use Gratitude to Counter Stress and Uncertainty
Infographic credit: VirtuesforLife
Dearest hearts, may we remind you that abundance is not confined to your bank balance. Although we recognize that money is the energy of exchange used most often in today’s world, we must stress that a person rich in coin who is poor in love for self and others is poorer than the one who is without home and sustenance. Abundance is not a matter of money.
When you take your focus away from the numbers in your bank account and place it solely on your state of well-being, you will be pleased to discover an upwelling of abundance in every area of your life
Money, your current measure of success, is like the waves in an ocean. It ebbs and flows as need or desire arises but abundance, which is energy, doesn’t need to become a trickle or a flood, it can be kept in a steady flow that will ensure all of your needs are met. It is to this state of fulfillment that we wish to direct your attention at this time. When you take your focus away from the numbers in your bank account and place it solely on your state of well-being, you will be pleased to discover an upwelling of abundance in every area of your life. As you focus on what’s right, what feels good, what brings you joy, and how you can contribute to the world around you, the entirety of your being begins to rise. First, you’ll experience an improved mood and better sleep, then you’ll begin enjoying a greater sense of physical vitality and increased clarity of mind and, finally, you’ll see that your material well-being increases.
Since you, just like money, are a vibrational product, you can offer complimentary or contradictory energy to the vibration of money and in turn to the vibration of abundance
Understand that money is not the master. Money by itself is without power and has no ability to effect change. It’s the energy behind the currency that determines whether it will be used for good or ill. Since you, just like money, are a vibrational product, you can offer complimentary or contradictory energy to the vibration of money and in turn to the vibration of abundance. This vibrational offering goes beyond money and indicates an overall sense of well-being. We mentioned before that a poverty of love for self and others is the poorest spirit but now let us explain why. When you hold love in your heart, you’re in a state of expansion. This expanded state draws to you everything that is like itself. This includes everything that either holds or can be used to create expansion. Expansion is the greatest state because it most imitates the Divine beingness of completion.
Money, may or may not signify expansion. Money that’s used to uplift, inspire, encourage and motivate others is money used in the most magnetic way possible. This money energy will attract more goodness and fulfillment as it creates a life of joyful ease for the user. Money that’s used to show off, gain power and subjugate others generates negative energy, and those who use money in this way, as a club to beat others down, will find they’re unable to enjoy what they’ve collected. There will be no life of ease and joy to be found, instead there will be disharmony in relationships, illness in the body and/or mind, and upheaval in many directions.
Within every situation, no matter how bleak, there’s an element of right. Your job is to find it.
The secret to abundance is not to be found in your ability to collect and hoard large sums of money but instead to align with the highest good in every situation. When you allow yourself to serve with the gifts you have been granted, you’ll experience abundant well-being throughout your body and your life. You may not be the wealthiest person in the room but you’ll be the most abundant. Serving by offering your gifts doesn’t mean working for no pay. Serving by giving, means giving your best to every situation and person you encounter, and in turn expecting to receive the best for your efforts. It means that you look for and find all that’s right in the world and then share that with others. Instead of negative or condemning self-talk and conversations you look for, honor and respect all that is going right and help others to do the same. This is not you expressing the Pollyanna viewpoint of naivete but a realistic look at everything that represents good, worth, and blessings for all. This doesn’t mean you look at what’s wrong and pretend it’s good. No, this practice suggests that you look at what is and find every good thing contained within it. Within every situation, no matter how bleak, there’s an element of right. Your job is to find it.
When you’re surrounded by everything that feels good and is right you’ll be overflowing with abundance
Living an abundant life doesn’t mean pretending to be grateful when your belly is empty or your soul is weary. Being abundant is a state of being that includes both blessing and receiving. As you look for and focus upon what’s right in every situation, you’ll call to yourself more that’s right. When you’re surrounded by everything that feels good and is right you’ll be overflowing with abundance. A steady stream of blessings will find you as you continue to bless others with your gifts and the light of love that is your authentic being.
True abundance is a life lived from the heart in which blessings stream from you and to you in a never-ending river of prosperity
Abundance is your birthright, it’s available to all and it’s unlimited. However, it’s not confined to the numbers in your bank balance. True abundance is a life lived from the heart in which blessings stream from you and to you in a never-ending river of prosperity.
There are three core aspects of a stable awakening. Recognising who you are. Recognising what you’re not. And seeing that those apparent two are essentially one: nondual. This piece is taken from The Complete Book of Awakening and is at the beginning of the second step of that awakening process. Reproduced with permission.
____________________
Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth.
~Arthur Conan Doyle
In Part One we’ve explored who you are. You may be beginning to notice that there is something constant in your experience, which we are suggesting is who you essentially are. The recognition, and deepening of this recognition, is awakening.
But it’s not actually a ‘thing’, this ‘something’ you’ve begun to notice. It’s not something of form that you can point at, look at, handle, manipulate. It’s something that you can do your best to describe with words like peace, contentment, open, spacious, free…but having ‘no words’ is perfectly OK too.
Now, in Part Two, we’re going to see what you are not. In traditional teachings of this understanding this is called the ‘neti neti’ process, which means, ‘not this, not this’. This describes a process of eliminating all the things that are not our essential self. This more tangible approach is helpful, given the ineffable qualities of who you essentially are that we looked at in Part One. What can’t be removed once everything removable has been taken out is, by definition, who you are.
Of course, nothing is actually ‘taken out’ — that would be impossible. Nothing is being thrown away or discarded. A healthy awakening exploration includes all of experience — but in order to untangle what has become tangled in our minds, it is helpful to work through this apparent elimination process.
In Part Three we will return to the integration of everything that we called ‘not this’.
This is a very modern exploration. We’ve turned classic spiritual schooling on its head, by beginning with ‘who you are’, rather than ‘what you are not’. The reason for this is we’re no longer looking at life-long paths of religious devotion and withdrawal from society. Awakening is not reserved for the elite few. So, awakening is immediately available, but the fact remains that as we grew up to have a stable sense of self in the world, alongside that we picked up a lot of extra baggage. Now it’s time to address that baggage.
A bit like doing an evaporation experiment in the chemistry lab, we’re now evaporating off everything that isn’t essential to us, evaporating all the extra baggage, which inevitably leaves only the essential. Only that which cannot be removed.
We referred to this extra baggage in Chapter Two when we described what we mean by the term ‘suffering’. Suffering is happening wherever something looks like a problem, like it should be different than how it is, like it requires a lot of effort, or like it’s overwhelming or impossible.
These responses to life are the signal that we have become identified with something that is not essential to who we are. And so, Part Two is all about recognising the areas of experience where we have become identified or collected baggage.
You may well find that suffering arises during your exploration of Part Two because the narrative mind resists what it deems to be dangerous, on behalf of an imagined separate self. And, to the narrative mind, this process seems dangerous.
We can assure you that this is a safe exploration, that nothing is actually being taken away, removed or discarded. All we are doing is disentangling who we really are from what we are not.
Given this context, our growing sense of who we are is foundational as we explore what we’re not. It makes it far easier to begin to recognise and put down the baggage. There will still be challenges — but knowing who we are gives us a touchstone to retreat to and a direction to head. This sense of self supports us in re-understanding a lot of what we thought we were.
In practice this means you may well find an urge to go back to Part One at times, as each step of our ‘not this’ process will bring the question of who you are into increasing focus. What follows now is a movement back and forth between who we are and what we are not — becoming ever clearer with each iteration.
A word on how we are approaching this.As before, we invite you to come into Part Two open, with your curious explorer’s hat on. We will be offering explorations as we did in Part One. If you want to remind yourself about how to get the most from them, you can pop back to Exploration 1.1.
Here we are looking at the many things we’ve been taught and taken to be the truth, or which we hold as conceptual ideas, but which don’t in fact align with our experience of life. These kinds of confusions clutter up the system, as we wrangle between what’s actually happening and what has been believed.
Given this backdrop, again we’re inviting you to be a scientist. Not the kind that does double-blind control studies, or creates new conceptual models of reality. We’re starting with the simple science of individual exploration. Arguably the closest to reality we can get.
Although there are now many scientific concepts that point to the same understanding that we’re talking about, we want to keep this very much in the actual experience you have in everyday life. Things get so much easier from there as we put the horse rightfully back in front of the cart.
As we walk through this section, notice any times when fear arises. It is very normal for the self-preservation thought mechanism to don its security guard’s cap and for us to experience that as suffering. The security guard tries to keep this conversation at bay. It does this with the intention of keeping us safe.
Indeed, the security guard mind could be right, if we truly were the things this book suggests we are not. If these things were essential to our being. In reality, the only ‘thing’ being threatened is a belief. An idea of who we are. How many new ideas have you had, over the years? How many beliefs have changed or fallen away? How many times have you changed your mind? Do your daytime thoughts, ideas and beliefs disappear every night when you fall asleep? And still, you are here, fundamentally undamaged and unchanged by ideas and beliefs.
This idea of who we are (who we think ourselves to be and what we think is essential to us) is a closer-in belief, a more well-rehearsed one, but a belief all the same. Made of the same stuff as all ideas and beliefs.
Do you remember in Exploration 3.3, in Part One, where you noticed a time of flow and how good that flow felt? Ironically, the learned safety mechanisms creating fear are keeping us away from that very positive experience of flow. Does it seem scary or dangerous to feel more in flow? Or, in flow were you actually more yourself? This point can help us counter the fearful thoughts with real experience, instead of the imagined danger.
We can acknowledge the thought, “This is dangerous,” but we don’t have to follow it or believe it.
And know that whatever happens, you’re OK. If who we are is essentially stable and secure, we can be OK in everything life brings to us. We have a foundation for the OK-ness of who we are in Part One, so we are safe to begin to explore what we are not. Which means we can ask the security guard to step aside and allow this exploration to continue.
Awakening is a beautifully reliable process. At any point you feel you need to, you can put the book to the side for a while. There’s no shame in taking time to do other things, and for moving at your own pace.
Our experience with clients shows us that sustainable awakening comes when we follow the process. When we explore through the layers of who we are and what we are not, then bring it all back together again — as we do in this book. But, more than that, we know to honour your timing and how the process shows up for you.
As a reminder, throughout this book each exploration we offer you has:
- a question (these are sometimes referred to as “self-enquiry”)
- a suggestion of what you might find, which is some logic that bridges from inner knowing to outer expression
- an experiment so you can test it out
- a working conclusion — something you can challenge, evolve and develop in life.
All four are vital in an honest exploration: question, suggestion, experiment, conclusion. And all reflect the approach of good science: self-enquiry, logic, and testing it out in life.
To aid the exploration process in Part Two we are now bringing in raw experience, to add to the direct experience we’ve been using to explore in Part One. You might remember from the Introduction that in raw experience we are aware of bodily sensations and the information of the five senses in their simplest form — absent of labels, comparisons or judgements.
If that feels unfamiliar to you just now, don’t worry, we’ll guide you through it in each exploration so that you’ll become increasingly familiar with it as we go along.
Wherever you see the headphones symbol, you can access a free audio recording of that experiment at thoughtfulraven.co.uk
And the download symbol indicates we have a free download available on the website.
Let’s begin with an exploration to demonstrate this neti neti, or evaporation, process that we’re about to embark on.
"Evil is always a “personal choice”. The phrase, “The devil made me do it!” seems humorous at first as a lame excuse for anyone to absolve themselves of any mea culpas." ...
"In the modern era Technology is playing a key role to shape the entire world and by virtue of the internet, we are now living in a global village." ...
"The Circle" is an anthem to breaking out of life’s daily grind. It’s applicable in so many life settings." ...
"Pink, green, yellow, and blues, Exhibiting altogether varying hues. With little colored planets revolving all around, All gazers are left with nothing, just spellbound." ...
"Although the mission, vision, and values of both groups may be identical, culturally inspired blips can arise from differences in which previous boards operated, from expectations of the CEO, from staff differences, etc." ...
"We should never take our eyes off our end goal as we strive daily to improve our game approach for business, sports, and life." ...
River deep clouds combine, Join themselves as one, Such a scene quite divine, Stop and stare before they’re gone. Floating free in harmony, Gently caressing heart and mind, Blessing visual memory, Nothing else so sweet and kind. Wonderful the scenic beauty, Makes the world a better place, Happy drifting from reality, Before the eyes an […]
"Is it possible for humans to collaborate and work together in the absence of collective consciousness? Is it possible for humans to collaborate if they remain in their “comfort zone”? Is it a comfort zone or better to call it the “laziness zone”?" ...
"Want to know how to weather the times, economic upheavals, business successes and failures, the birth of a child, and the loss of a friend?" ...
"One thing I don’t want to forget is the empathy the other drivers displayed that day. For a cynic like me, their actions did indeed prove that human kindness still exists." ...
"Nothing holds back human progress like the false belief that the words 'impossible' and 'improbable' are synonymous." ...
"What have you learned lately…or what would you like to learn? What would move you forward- inspire you- lift your spirits or your income?? What could you learn to help your clients better or faster?" ...
"Yes, there are more but just for today... Here's to all who connect and love to see... the beauty and the uniqueness of each tree!" ...
"The journey within can surely ignite the passion for living a new awareness. Noticing the reflective patterns in our lives allows us to see sides and recognize no difference... all in and is one." ...
"She helps people find their own, and others around them, paths that tie value to humanity, and she understands that "leaders are not doers, they're the developers of doers." ...
"Being curious naturally forces us to slow down, to take ourselves off the autopilot or cruise control mode that is daily life for most of us. Being curious encourages us to engage more meaningfully with others at work, at home, and at school. " ...
"Perhaps it's just a day or a moment in the sun, but living with a smile lets you know that you have won." ...
"What holds a lot of us back is fear of the unknown…and forever being led to believe that we are not worthy or strong enough, or smart enough to make a go of it on our own." ...
"How many big mistakes can you make and still end up with an amazing life? Quite a lot, it turns out, if the Goddess has your back…"
"He came again after all these years hoping that the chair would still be there, and it was, still resting in the sand near the sand dunes." ...
"We are all alchemists and magicians, having innate prophetic knowledge, to create and manifest through the imaginative faculty of our minds. Yet we don’t. Why?" ...
"No matter the season or the reason I find myself most at home among the trees. Perhaps they beckon to you as well to come, stay awhile. Where do you go to be filled with light and to shine?" ...
"The birth of a new day. Witnessing the pure wonder and delight of myriad colors, elevating the inward spirit, caressing the heart with optimism and positivity." ...
"When we’re anticipating something, we can almost see it and feel it. It comes to life in our minds." ...
"What if…, every time I experienced a breakdown, I smiled and started celebrating the breakthrough?" ...
"I take Autumn as My Own; to rest my body and each weary bone. A time to reflect, wonder, then plan." ...
"I began to determine the common denominators among my clients, who set and achieved 90-day goals for their businesses, their personal lives, their education, their careers … including all areas of life." ...
"A flickering flame on a candle elicits feelings of warmth or even hope. Hope for a better time waiting for its chance to arrive." ...
"Boundaries help teach others how to treat you. Knowing your boundaries can bring a sense of freedom to your life." ...
"There is a journey of the heart that calls to those who are seeking something more" ...
"What if no one needs to be right or wrong? What if both of our wants and needs matter and it is up to each of us to take care of ourselves instead of trying to take care of the needs of each other?" ...
Slaves Of men They were But worse off Were those Who afflicted For they were Slaves of SIN!
"There are a whole lot more reasons for anger in people. But mostly they have to do with the environment in which they find themselves." ...
"When you show off your team, your customer gets a better feel for what the shopping experience will be like and helps make it more personal." ...
"Just like your muscles get strong with use, your creativity gets stronger when exercised. How do you increase your creativity?" ...
"Tough conversations are attempted and avoided every single day. On average, a leader avoids a tough conversation for 6 months up to two years." ...
"Our materialistic world has polluted the meaning of pride in favor of faked or cosmetic pride." ...
"An optimum email deliverability rate implies that your emails are getting “delivered” to the user’s inbox without triggering the spam filters. " ...
"The leaf floated in the calming wind, twirling slowly and even rising back up toward the oak." ...
When Prospero is taking pride To enslave Caliban with his advanced civility of might And only tend to deride Caliban retorted with sheer vexation towards his master Who gave him the strength of language with its intriguing nuances just to admire? With his inherent rational fabric And claimed of having liberty to curse out of […]
"What is the significance of having an accountability partner in guarding one’s integrity?" ...
"It’s with the concepts of discernment, perception, and observation that we can begin to change up our need to judge everything and allow it to simply be what it is." ...
"It is inspiring to listen to someone who has taken cancer head-on and is smiling through the process." ...
"Perfection almost needs to never be realized, to remain an unattainable horizon, a potential, reached only episodically." ...
"The circuity of comedy and conversation takes us through sharing sacred space in truth-telling as well." ...
"Hope drifted through the dapples of sunlight through the trees. Visiting birds brought joy as I knelt on wounded knees." ...
"If you do not feel a sense of power within then it is going to be very difficult to impossible to influence another." ...
"If we adapt human society to the fabric of nature, we will feel that it supports us, and life will be an effortless ride." ...
"Successful leaders build personal relationships first before jumping into the business discussion." ...
"A short episode designed to reconnect and remind you that we are here, champing at the bit and ready to get going." ...
"In good times remember to always fear adversity, and in adversity remember to always hope for better things …"
"You always hear the term bucket list which equates to something someone would like to do before their time is gone." ...
"I want to show up consistently, be in service, and do it hand in hand with folks driven by similar motivations and missions that go beyond ourselves!" ...
"The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane." ...
"What I “do” is translate the invisible, inaudible, intangible energies of other dimensions into a form to which more people can relate and, hopefully, from which receive the divine guidance that will assist them in transforming their lives." ...
"My mother is my greatest epitome which I have no choice but to eulogize I am mesmerized by her envious legacy and never tend to hide" ...
"At the end of the day, we are all humans, we all have our personal lives and we bring along those personal lives to work every day. So, for me, it's very important to be respectful and kind towards each other." ...
"A rose of peace, a shining light Full of joy, a gift of Nature Blessing hearts with optimism" ...
"Colloidal silver helps heal the body is by blocking the ability of bacteria and viruses to “breath.” The silver stifles the enzymes that pathogens need to survive, thereby suffocating the pathogen." ...
"There are days when the world lies, days when it tells the truth. Tonight it speaks the truth - and with what sad, insistent beauty..." ...
"There's almost always a way through, and you'll find the way through by moving toward the conflict, asking questions and keeping quiet. Conversations create the future. Whether or not we have them and how we have them is up to us." ...
"The stars and The constellations Above - And the Full faced moon Hanging over The earth" ...
"The basic anti-bullying messages haven’t changed, nor have they been updated yet the bullying continues. Clearly, something isn’t working." ...
Any Gumshoe (Detective) who is candid, will readily tell you that “CIs” (confidential informants) AKA: “snitches” are very necessary and a valuable asset when it comes to solving cases; instigating investigations; developing case leads; providing intel of the latest news on the streets and the “who’s who in the zoo”. Intel makes a detective’s world […]
"Something should be done - the odds may not be in our favour, but starting the job with a clear-eyed assessment of where we are would already be quite a step up from being completely blind." ...
"When we let go of the need to control and change the things we don’t have the power to and accept what comes our way, our stress decreases significantly." ...
"One way we can elicit a more flexible cognitive mindset is through the restructuring of a situation to make sense of it, rather than being fixated on one possible outcome, we can be curious and think about it differently." ...
new and creative thought is more likely to occur in the work environment, leading to new venues for business, a wider audience, branding improvement, and ultimately a more significant income.
"One man cannot do right in one department of life whilst he is occupied in doing wrong in any other department. Life is one indivisible whole." ...
"Sunshine is a benefit, not just to keep us warm, but feeding the body with what could be interpreted as positive vibes."
Once upon a time, when it was the best of times and the worst of times. Times that tried men’s souls. It was a dark and stormy night . . . wait a darn minute! Belay all of that. Gumshoe has regressed into a writer’s web of mangled hackneyed and weary-worded topic sentences that were […]
"Our world is endangered by the absence of good ideas. Our world is in crisis because of the absence of consciousness." ...
"Remember while not every idea has to change a nation, your idea can make yours or others’ day-to-day lives easier." ...
"Employees are more inspired when they believe they have significant ownership and investment in the company they work for." ...
"Throughout the world, the pandemic exposed new and unforeseen challenges for employees in the workplace. Although some employees found the challenges exciting, most others experienced the pandemic as exhausting, and anxiety-provoking, and it affected their ability to work effectively." ...
"Oh, Moon! I am utterly overwhelmed by your croon Wearing a Silvery shoon You make your emphatic presence on Earth’s floor with unique melody and tune..."
"Myths have some truth, but they don't change behavior. Connected citizens have the power to reduce fear and create positive change to restore community trust, safety, and confidence." ...
"Striving to address gaps in educational training, including workplace training on unconscious bias." ...
"What would it feel like to work with some who invites you to reclaim your presence whether you have a case to win, a story to tell, a keynote to shape, or a vision to sell?: ...
"Daily meditation, sound healing music, writing in my gratitude journal, relaxation, yoga, and deep breathing link me to spirituality." ...
"Inspired people create change. Because inspiration is the spark of motivation. It's the breath of the muses awakening your dreams. It's also the engine that drives you to achieve your goals." ...
"What people or situations have rejected you? What did they represent? What are their values and ideals? What were you hoping to accomplish by being accepted by them? What loss has occurred now that you’ve been rejected?" ...
"In acceptance, we learn to not just consider what we lose, but also what we gain." ...
“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves..” ...
"You cannot survive on your athletic skills alone when playing. Mental training is just as important." ...
"If we are going to be a country, then we must change what is wrong. We must realize that what has happened in history can be repeated when moral values and respect for life are degraded." ...
"The ego, the personal mind, or the whirlpools of my own metaphor create a round-and-round repeating-pattern kind of experience." ...
" ... We are now reaching a consensus about dumping the idea of sickness altogether and replacing it with WELL-NESS…as a primary goal in life." ...
"A peacock is dancing in the wood To allure peahen in loud What an aesthetic scene Colors and flavor are mixed to produce an enigma of love." ...
"Who are the mentors and teachers in your life that you are grateful for and assisted in paving a way for your own evolution?" ...
"This shift happened as a result of many factors; what matters now is millions of people are questioning these work norms and demanding better conditions." ...
Set them free Like a Helium balloon Carried by a brisk breeze or A paper kite flying up into the sky.
"One way of standing out of the crowd that I find amazing is flipping a normal situation to make it abnormal and against the prevailing practices." ...
"No one said being responsible for other beings was an easy choice requiring no compromises. I knew what I was embarking on." ...