Mouthful with Beloved Sechele: Recent Episodes
Beloved Sechele
My name is Beloved Sechele and I have a mouthful to say on a myriad of topics. Join me as I discuss various philosophical, socio-political and personal topics. And if you are into reality TV, then you will especially love the TV Tea Time segment!
This has certainly been an eventful year for many of us and I have taken it upon myself to unpack that in this episode. I do so by listing five of the greatest lessons that I had to learn this year - whether willingly, or under life's duress. In this episode, you will hear me lament, praise, and thank 2021 for all it has been (and perhaps could've been).
References:
Psalm 19:21
101 Essays That Will Change The Way You Think - Brianna Wiest
'Mouthful' made its debut with an episode where I discussed the relationship between black women and their hair. Well, consider this episode a 2.0 version of that. In this episode I discuss the evolution of the Natural Hair Movement. I do so by using the imagery of a 'mental sandwich'. Does the state of your hair, as a black women, determine your blackness? Does straightening your hair denounce your blackness? Is there even a link between your hair and your blackness? Tune in to hear what I have to say about this!
Inspired by the book 'The Five Languages of Apology' by Gary Chapman, this week's episode looks into all the apology languages and I expand on which I believe are effective, and which I believe to be not. I encourage you to complete a quick quiz to determine which apology languages you best resonate with, so that you have sufficient and personal insight around the topic! enjoy besties!
https://www.5lovelanguages.com/quizzes/apology-language
Hey besties! I'm back and I am certainly not holding back this episode! Join in on the conversation around our experiences and strife as black women, how we can maneuver around that and some unsponsored Love Island promo lol. I specifically speak about the experiences of Simone Biles and my girl Kaz, who are both figures in the public eye that are reflective of many of our experiences. I would love to know what you think!
Prompted by an Instagram post that I discovered a few days ago, this episode has me spiraling as I talk about how I've laboured for love. I speak on how my family dynamics, patriarchal conditioning, faith and many other factors contribute towards my idea and understanding of love, and how that influenced how I express myself and choose to be vulnerable. I also touch on friendship dynamics as well as the idea of reciprocation in relationships and friendships.
This week we have a very lengthy and nuanced conversation with Thato Megale on age dynamics in romantic relationships, how they're influenced by culture and historical contexts. We also discuss the disparity between the 'traditional' African model of what relationships should look like and the Westernized idea of relationship dynamics. Finally, we get into power dynamics and the complexities around consent.
This week I talk about one of the top 5 personality traits - agreeableness. I speak about it being gendered and its relation to the gender wage gap and patriarchy in general.
Video referenced in the episdose:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aMcjxSThD54
The Personality Trait Test I took:
https://www.truity.com/test/big-five-personality-test
In response to current popular culture activities, I invited my friend, Monique Jade, to have a conversation with me around multi-dating, stigmas around women's dating activities, dating as a woman of faith, boundaries, standards, and many more!
This week I want to talk about what appears to be another social pandemic on its own - misogyny. Specifically from women who exhibit 'Pick Me' -ism. I go into the meaning of the term, how it manifests itself in society and why we could definitely do without it.
This week I discuss social media activism and the state of activism in general. I submit my plea to exist outside of my struggles as a black South African woman and to reclaim my identity outside of that which I advocate for!
I sit down with one of my best friends, Mamello Marite, and we discuss the complexities of friendships and romantic relationships. We talk about possessiveness, insecurities, communication, the role of our egos in how we relate to one another, and many other relational topics! All of this, coming from our varying perspectives - her, as someone in a romantic relationship; and myself, as a single body.
Enjoy!
Bouncing off of a rather controversial statement that a very well known gospel artist has made; this conversation is going to be on whether or not it is fair to classify women as hoes or wife material, the role that the church and other organized social structures play in such classification, the respectability politics that have a hand in such classification, as well as the standardization of marriage as an accolade.
I'd like to preface with a trigger warning. This episode is on beauty standards, pedophilia, pedophilic disorder, molestation and sexual predatory behaviours. There is great mention made of sexual violence and the like.
Should you wish to consult the sources that I made mention of, please follow the links below;
Cape Talk interview with Dr Eve:
http://www.capetalk.co.za/articles/261647/why-pedophiles-are-different-from-child-molesters-dr-eve-explains
Teddy Bear Clinic And Another v Minister of Justice and Constitutional Development And Another:
http://www.saflii.org/za/cases/ZACC/2013/35.html
Unpacking the 2-year age-gap provision in relation to the decriminalisation of underage consensual sex in South Africa:
http://www.sajbl.org.za/index.php/sajbl/article/view/594/576
Criminal Law (Sexual Offences and Related Matters) Amendment Act 32 of 2007
https://www.gov.za/documents/criminal-law-sexual-offences-and-related-matters-amendment-act
Behaviours of Sexual Predators: Grooming:
https://www.icmec.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Behaviors-of-Sexual-Predators-Grooming.pdf
This episode marks the debut of features, and does so with a very special guest. I brought along with me Samkelo Khumalo (widely known as JaysVillas) to have a very frank conversation about patriarchy and its affects on men. Tune in on the discussion on the detriment that the system bears to even those who greatly benefit from it. Don't forget to engage and enjoy!
There has been quite a peculiar response to Saweetie having presumably cut her hair. This sparks the premise of this episode's discussion around the relationship between black women and their hair.