Horny OFF MAIN: Recent Episodes
Comedy Here Often? Podcast Network
A show about desire, shame and the ever-present blessing and burden of being alive (so basically the experience of having a crush). Hosts Katie-Ellen Humphries (comedian CBC’s The Debaters, Sirius XF) and Amitai Marmorstein (actor Netflix, Disney) welcome a collection of compelling guests to explore the feelings, behaviours and habits we’re not always encouraged to express. Feel part of intimate, hilarious conversations as a pair of comically late bloomers and their funny guests connect over the awkward, challenging and silly things that make us who we are.Katie-Ellen's debut standup comedy album Ladyfinger is streaming exclusively on @Pandoramusic now. Click the link to listen: https://800PGR.lnk.to/humphriesWE
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This is a quick note from your HOM hosts to say we will be stepping away from weekly episodes, for a time. But this show WILL continue. Just at a different pace. We're so grateful for all the weeks we've spent together and look forward to spending more time together in the future. Thank you! https://www.hornyoffmainpod.com/
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This week your HOM hosts are reunited in person to chat about how sports talk can veil vulnerability and the value of connection plus whether or not fantasy sports is a cult. This week Katie-Ellen is horny for the flavour of rose while Amitai is horny for sports documentaries. www.hornyoffmainpod.com
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Your horny heroes are back in the virtual blanket fort to discuss shower singing, imagined conversations, and the practice of direct communication. Also, Katie-Ellen shares their very poetic experiences as a young skimboarder. This week Katie is horny for people being horny for fall, while Amitai is horny for carnival games. Also, Amitai finally remembered how to properly record remotely, so if you've been avoiding recent episodes due to sound quality issues, it should be safe to return now! https://www.hornyoffmainpod.com/
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Your HOM hosts huddle up virtually this time to discuss their recent experience briefly sharing a studio apartment and what it means to take up space in general. Also addressed is Katie’s as yet unmentioned appreciation for the Kevin Federline single popozao and undying love of O’Ryan’s thick and crunky (RIP), while Amitai waxes lyrical about packing and the nature of travel. This week Katie is horny for the Staten Island Ferry (and when Yankee fans are upset) and Amitai is horny for unspoken communication. www.hornyoffmainpod.com
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Your HOM hosts huddle up virtually this time to discuss their recent experience briefly sharing a studio apartment and what it means to take up space in general. Also addressed is Katie’s as yet unmentioned appreciation for the Kevin Federline single popozao and undying love of O’Ryan’s thick and crunky (RIP), while Amitai waxes lyrical about packing and the nature of travel. This week Katie is horny for the Staten Island Ferry (and when Yankee fans are upset) and Amitai is horny for unspoken communication. www.hornyoffmainpod.com
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Your HOM hosts are together live in New York City to see the patron saint of Horny OFF MAIN pod, Montero, aka Lil Nas X! The pair recount their experience, including resentment at being inspired. Check out the Long Live Montero Live tour if you’re able and regardless let us know how you do in your attempts to live authentically as our young hero advocates. www.hornyoffmainpod.com
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Your HOM hosts are together live in New York City to see the patron saint of Horny OFF MAIN pod, Montero, aka Lil Nas X! The pair recount their experience, including resentment at being inspired. Check out the Long Live Montero Live tour if you’re able and regardless let us know how you do in your attempts to live authentically as our young hero advocates. www.hornyoffmainpod.com
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Oh boi. Your HOM are separated by a continent but their bond remains strong. Stronger than the audio quality this week, which is admittedly a little sub-par, unlike the quality of the friend hang. Katie-Ellen updates Amitai on settling into a new temporary home and the pair dive into the nature of looking to the future. This week Katie is horny for the borough of Queens, NY while Amitai is horny for the sweet impulsivity of a last minute hang. www.hornyoffmainpod.com
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Oh boi. Your HOM are separated by a continent but their bond remains strong. Stronger than the audio quality this week, which is admittedly a little sub-par, unlike the quality of the friend hang. Katie-Ellen updates Amitai on settling into a new temporary home and the pair dive into the nature of looking to the future. This week Katie is horny for the borough of Queens, NY while Amitai is horny for the sweet impulsivity of a last minute hang. www.hornyoffmainpod.com
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It’s a doozy this week! Your HOM hosts huddle up to chat about the intoxication of another person’s certainty, aging, outsourcing therapy, and the two things everyone fundamentally wants. Plus, Katie-Ellen shares a wild story about the weird and mild disfigurements of their youth. Get on board. This week Amitai is horny for the phrase (and everything that goes with it) “touch grass” while Katie is horny for the television genre of Timothy Oliphant walking purposefully in boots. https://www.hornyoffmainpod.com/
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It’s a doozy this week! Your HOM hosts huddle up to chat about the intoxication of another person’s certainty, aging, outsourcing therapy, and the two things everyone fundamentally wants. Plus, Katie-Ellen shares a wild story about the weird and mild disfigurements of their youth. Get on board. This week Amitai is horny for the phrase (and everything that goes with it) “touch grass” while Katie is horny for the television genre of Timothy Oliphant walking purposefully in boots. https://www.hornyoffmainpod.com/
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Your HOM hosts explore the bounds of optimism & “happiness” when Amitai tries to tell Katie-Ellen about “Agentic Hope” (a word Katie seemingly refuses to learn). This week Amitai is horny for remembering “meet cute” details with your fellow meet cuter (because he is the cutest!) while Katie-Ellen is horny for fresh water swimming. www.hornyoffmainpod.com
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Your HOM hosts huddle up to chat camping as personality vs bleak reality, WNBA, a Jack Black homage and more. This week Katie-Ellen is horny for bridges while Amitai is horny for everyone’s favourite General Store, Welk’s. www.hornyoffmainpod.com.
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Things get spicy this week when HOM hosts Amitai and Katie-Ellen reveal their unabashed bias against only children. Katie-Ellen shares a haunting overheard that launches the pair into a discussion of siblinghood and family relations and prompts Ami to share something fascinating about his Dad’s dick (finally!). This week Katie-Ellen his horny for the scent of strangers on the street while Amitai is horny for the show “Loot.” www.hornyoffmainpod.com
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Your HOM hosts huddle up while Katie shares her failed attempt at human connection in Vancouver, Amitai again confounds his bestie co-host with his ability to process feelings, and the pair marvel at long-distance sports hobbyists. This week Amitai is horny for Canadian treasure Nardwar while Katie-Ellen is horny for savory pies. www.hornyoffmainpod.com
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Reunited at last, the besties discuss text styles, going without a phone, and how to not do stuff when abroad. Ami and Katie-Ellen also both share stories of their recent adventures white water rafting and wandering Australia, respectively. This week Katie-Ellen is horny for Aussie television, while Amitai is horny for foreign terrain.
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Horny OFF MAIN celebrates 100 episodes, 100 weeks of horny fun, with their first return guest, who also has the distinction of being the first guest ever to appear on the show a full 99 weeks ago, the phenomenally funny, interesting & beautiful Henok Meresa. Amitai & Katie-Ellen delight in their adored guest of honour & mark the occasion with their usual blend of humour, vulnerability & idiocy. The hosts are horny as possible for Henok & for everyone who has listened to the show so far.
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Your HOM hosts huddle up to chat sapiosexuals, ticket scalpers, and other folks they don’t respect. Plus the pair tackle how to change existing dynamics in a relationship. This week Amitai is horny for when it rains but it’s not cold while Katie-Ellen is horny for the beauty of youth sports. www.hornyoffmainpod.com
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This week your HOM hosts huddle up to chat weed store lighting and advances in retail hallucinogenics, the ability to be present, and the joy of the mundane. They also ask the question, is it important to be original in therapy? Katie-Ellen is horny for long-running comedy podcast pioneer “Stop Podcasting Yourself” (catch their recent guest appearance on episode #745) while Amitai is horny for the event “Vallea Lumina” in Whistler.
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Katie-Ellen channels Dante from “Clerks” basically for the entire episode while they recount their first-hand experience watching airline travel meltdown around them and blessedly enjoys the in-person company of sweet co-host Amitai. In addition to travel tribulations, the pair chat frozen food from family, customer service agents, and impotent male rage. This week Katie-Ellen is horny for The Den Theatre in Chicago and Amitai is horny for the adrenaline rush of seeing your checked bag show up on the bag carousel. www.hornyoffmainpod.com
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Maybe the horniest episode yet. Your HOM hosts huddle up and talk talking about dreams, tarot and tattoos. Plus some confessional talk about…anticipation. This week Katie-Ellen is horny for matcha and Amitai is horny for artichokes. www.hornyoffmainpod.com
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Your pals are back at it again, this time discussing what they look for in a hotel room, sharing unshareable things, and attempting to decipher what, exactly, is a gala? Also Katie-Ellen has the epiphany that you can just...do nice things. And it's true, you can! Go! Do them! They're nice! This week Amitai is horny for food in skewer form, while Katie-Ellen is Horny for the fried artichoke sandwich from The Arbor Restaurant. www.hornyoffmainpod.com
This week Katie-Ellen shares some “off main” shame with beloved co-host Amitai and together the pair unpack feelings around employment, productivity and identity. They also talk going to the movies and of course, they’re horny for stuff. Specifically Amitai is horny for the podcast “No Studip Questions” and Katie is horny for an internet stranger/neighbour/Craigslist free stuff picker upper. www.hornyoffmainpod.com
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This week your HOM hosts get together with NO FEAR to discuss musicals, the “cost of admission” when you’re in love and impressive timing (plus some light chat on the value of mortality, you know). Amitai is horny for “WNBA League Pass'' while Katie-Ellen is (respectfully and cautiously) horny for Blue Jays catcher/DH Alejandro Kirk. www.hornyoffmainpod.com
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This week your HOM hosts huddle up and get vulnerable about aesthetics. Katie-Ellen has just been airbrush spray tanned and Amitai had a moral quandary at the dentist. The pair recount a blessed return to a live music event and are extra horny for all the performers, including Estea Elements and DJ K-Rec, Friends with the Help and Yukon’s own Local Boy. Plus, let us know the weirdest place you ever lost your retainer. Don’t forget to check out www.hornyoffmainpod.com
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This week your HOM hosts huddle up while Katie-Ellen recounts weekend adventures in Virginia and the pair wrestle with whether or not to stare into the void. Plus a debate for the ages: do you dry off inside the shower or out? Amitai is horny for playgrounds at night while Katie is horny for GWAR Bar.
Hosts Amitai and Katie-Ellen gather to gab about cold opens and hot dates (gone awry). They also discuss how to talk about ones sex life without being a creep about it. Useful stuff! This week Amitai is horny for "imaginary stakes" and Katie-Ellen gifts us with another patented Horny For TV Show Rec™: Casual(available on Netflix).
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Hosts Katie-Ellen and Amitai are reunited after a week apart and the joy is palpable! Katie regales Ami with tales of adventures at the Winnipeg Comedy Festival plus the two talk “Catfishing”, early relationship drama and how we talk about our lives with people we love versus the people we don’t. Katie-Ellen has returned home horny for the local Winnipeg comedy scene and Amitai is horny for faved fireside (and elsewhere) treat the marshmallow.
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In this episode your besties gather on the couch to talk talking to yourself, segues, and getting juuuust the right amount of drunk. And (as usual) Katie-Ellen shares some baseball wisdom that we can all use. This week Amitai is horny for showboating in sports, while Katie-Ellen is horny for the book she's reading, Tell Everyone On This Train I Love Them by Maeve Higgins. More at www.hornyoffmainpod.com.
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This week your wily hosts hop on the couch to discuss return policies, baseball butts, platonic sleepovers, and the philosophical lesson of keeping an open mind while shopping. Also, it's revealed that Amitai's mom once gave Katie-Ellen a romance novel?? This week Ami is horny for Graffiti (particularly Vancouver's local flavour of it) and Katie-Ellen is horny for gelato utensils. Extras at http://www.hornyoffmainpod.com
This week HOM hosts huddle up while Katie-Ellen recounts a recent trip to Washington, D.C. including Amitai’s favoured informal segment “Katie experiences rich people.” The pair rail against unpaid internships and exalt in one another's company. This week Katie is horny enough for the both of them, so while Ami takes a little reprieve from the energy of horniness, Katie is over the moon horny for the new weekly comedy and drag show “Camp Comedy” every Tuesday night in Vancouver at the Ellis Building, 8 pm, hosted by the incredible Sasha Mark and Savannah Erasmus. It’s Vancouver’s only all-indigenous-run comedy show and it is next-level fun. Check it out if you’re in Vancouver. Katie is also horny for red-eye flights, which is less transcendent than queer radical independent comedy, but is the closest they’ve come to time travel so still noteworthy. Thanks for listening y’all. More about the show at www.hornyoffmainpod.com.
This week HOM hosts are joined by comedian and dreamboat An-Te Chu. The trio gather up and chat books, crying and teaching. Plus An-Te illuminates on the world of E-Sports. An-Te is a nonstop delight and HOM was thrilled to have him guest before he set off to teach in the U.K. Extra content at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog
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CW: This episode contains talk of disordered eating.
This week Katie-Ellen and Amitai huddle up and do a deeper dive on a topic that’s weaved its way into conversations and hovers below the surface of all of what’s discussed on Horny OFF MAIN and that’s “weird” food stuff. Your HOM hosts each share some of their experiences with restricted diets and ongoing relationships with food. Plus they giggle and exalt in one another’s company, as always. Amitai is horny for lighting while Katie-Ellen is horny for previous Amitai horny for, “Chameleon Season 3: Wild Boys” hosted by Sam Mullins.
Your HOM huddles up in person to catch up on an adventure-filled week that included breweries, travel, and a weird amount of cheese. Plus Katie-Ellen recounts a fateful visit with an artfully cruel matriarch. This week Katie-Ellen is horny for the independent comedy club “Laughing Tap” in Milwaukee, WI while Amitai is horny for water. Extras at www.hornyoffmainpod.com
Ohhh boi. Your hosts are extra horny this week to be joined by their extraordinary guest: actor, theatre creator, educator and super babe Tich Wilson. The trio gaggle up to talk neurodiversity, dating apps, confidence, puppetry (and a little side of trauma work, naturally). Check out fun extras for this episode at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
Your HOM Hosts tackle the hard hitting (the snooze button) issues of the day on this week’s ep when they talk Daylight Savings Time. Plus Katie-Ellen asks “is it time to hang up the blazer?” The hosts are horny for walk-on music and “kinetic movies” and as always for each and every listener. Extras at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
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This week your HOM hosts huddle up to talk Ego Death (spooooky). They also explore their dream identities, local city scenes and hate on “Eat Pray Loving”. This week Katie-Ellen is horny for Marie Kondo and her magical methods while Amitai is horny for rainbows. Extras at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog. Check out Katie-Ellen’s new live standup weekly show at Hero’s Welcome. www.hatsoffcomedy.com.
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Your HOM hosts huddle up this week to talk HEROS (not the sandwich, but those definitely don’t get enough love these days, shout out to comically long sandos.) Like the rest of the world, faced with the threat of nuclear annihilation, Katie-Ellen and Amitai carry on with their silly little lives, which includes banter about Jennifer Lawrence, memorable Marios and a particularly formative heckle. This week Amitai is horny for the podcast Chameleon, Season 3: Wild Boys, while Katie-Ellen is horny for the TV show Togetherness.
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This week your HOM hosts chat gamification, playing through the pain and diagnostics, plus raise the question “is Katie-Ellen failing at everything?” Amitai is horny for Formula One racing while Katie is horny for ferry boats. Extras at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog
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HOM hosts Katie-Ellen and Amitai are back in-person after a month apart and the joy is palpable. Amitai blows Katie-Ellen’s sweet dumb mind when he tells her about “Askers” and “Estimaters” and the two wrangle with language and communication styles. This week Katie-Ellen is horny for nail salons and Amitai is horny for Vancouver’s Queen Elizabeth Park. Extras at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog
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Your HOM hosts are not yet reunited but they are once again back in the same country. Katie-Ellen returns from America to fill her bestie in on the adventure of moving into her ex’s basement and the two pals discuss their relationship to their own living situations. This week Amitai is horny for a quiet dark space while Katie-Ellen is embarrassingly horny for the Space Needle (not exclusively). Extra content at www.hornyoffmainpod.com.blog.
This week HOM hosts Katie-Ellen and Amitai huddle up to gab best friend style and connect over reaching out to others when you’re going through something difficult, why that can often be a challenge and how it can be a gift. Plus the pair giggle over the silliness of their week and share some extra fun things they’re horny for. Check it out! Extra content at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
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Can you get inoculated against sadness? You can try! This week our host micro and macro dose emotional pain and see what it’s like (hopefully) on the other side. Katie-Ellen and their trash taste is horny for frozen yogurt while Amitai is horny for cold Reese Peanut Butter Cups. Extra content at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog
HOM Hosts Amitai and Katie-Ellen gather in the digital tree fort from opposite coasts this week to discuss decision paralysis, change of scenery and whether Katie-Ellen and a certain figure from her past really do “got it like that.” Amitai is horny for quiet while Katie-Ellen is horny for the podcast “Where Should We Begin with Esther Perel.” Extra content at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
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Your HOM hosts are cozy up on the couch this week to peel back the layers of memory. Plus, Amitai reveals his sensual side while Katie-Ellen explores smell. It’s a delight for the senses. Extras at www.hornyoffmaidpod.com
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For the first episode of 2022 your HOM hosts Katie-Ellen and Amitai slide into the virtual blanket fort to discuss new year rituals, winter fun and a sexy rendezvous gone sideways. Plus, Katie shares her intention to be unhinged this year. Happy New Year, Hornettes. Content extras at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog
Hosts Amitai and Katie-Ellen welcome delightful comedian, podcast host and anti-authority darling MJ Bourque. The trio gab about sharing your interests with strangers, misophonia, Bonanza and more on this Flaming Hot Doritos of an episode. Catch MJ’s podcast “What Did I Miss?” wherever you get your podcasts. Episode extras at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
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This week your HOM hosts ask the important questions like “why are there so many podcasts about rainbows?” Not really. Mostly one host spirals while the other keeps them afloat. Tune in to see which one! As North Americans adjust to another wave of Covid19 and the omicron variant, Amitai and Katie-Ellen get back to their roots as a podcast started in peak pandemic restrictions and tackle what it means to have dreams. If you’re feeling isolated or sad or angry or horny or any other kind of way, know there’s a couple of Pals in tiny East Van apartments who feel the same way and are glad you exist and grateful to you for listening. Extra content at www.hornyoffmain.com/blog
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We get spicy on this episode when Katie-Ellen uncharacteristically hates on a local coffee spot, Amitai illuminates about direct communication styles and the pair relate on their shared disinterest in apocalyptic survival. This week Amitai is horny for people singing in their cars, Katie-Ellen is horny for the work of Niko Stratis. Extra content at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
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Your HOM hosts explore the fancy side of life this week (and as always are one another’s opposites). The pair discuss hand-me-downs, “Google Pride” and the alphabet song while Amitai confesses his “#FancyBoi ways and Katie-Ellen goes on record as “ride or die Ja Rule.” Katie-Ellen is horny for Yeshi Ginger Sesame salad dressing and Amitai is horny for a very special “restaurant club”. Extra content at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
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This week HOM hosts are absolutely thrilled to welcome beloved comedian, filmmaker, writer and notable podcast network director Dan Duvall. Dan illuminates Amitai and Katie-Ellen on his journey through codependency (and other) recovery, Beverly Hills 90210 and misadventures in argyle sweaters. The trio also chat worst names for genitalia, tattoos and more. Our saddles are ready and we are extra horny for this one. Follow Dan on Twitter and Instagram at @lazerdoov. Bonus content at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
This week your HOM hosts Amitai and Katie-Ellen have a great time talking timing. Does it rule us? Does it matter? What is time anyway? As always they are a little bit stupid and a whole lot charming. Amitai is horny for local East Van eatery Martini’s while Katie-Ellen is horning for going for a drive. Extras and special content at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
This ep finds your HOM reunited in person after a long week apart. The two exalt in one another’s company while Katie recounts her adventures in America. (USA! USA!). This week Amitai is horny for the podcast “Word Bomb” while Katie is horny for American confidence. Extras at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
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Your Horny OFF MAIN hosts huddle up to talk zombies, slut shaming and Amitai’s history as a Halloween Grinch. This week Katie is horny for gummy vitamins while Ami is horny for dog Halloween costumes. Special content and extras (including pups in costumes!) at www.hornyoffmain.com/blog
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Hosts Amitai and Katie-Ellen hunker down for a bestie hang to gab about dominos (literal and metaphorical) Bar Mitzvah Bangers, the failings of “self-care” and more. Plus they share some mild dismissal for the work of Daniel Powter and more than mild dismissal of Drake. This week Amitai is horny for senior men’s friendship while Katie is horny for people taking pictures of leaves.
Your HOM hosts are joined this week by hilarious comedian Dana Smith, whose debut comedy album I’ll Smile At Your Funeral is out now on Howl & Roar Records. HOM listeners will know Dana as a member of sketch comedy troupe HUNKS with previous pod guest (and her spouse) Tim Grey and any listener will love her and her hilarious stand up album. The trio chat adult virginity, confidence through ignorance and what exactly is in a paralyzer. Check out Dana’s album here https://howlandroarrecords.com/shop/dana-smith-ill-smile-at-your-funeral/ and pod extras at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
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Your intrepid hosts return to talk biopics, celebrity endorsements, and the joys of getting accidentally drunk. This week Katie-Ellen is horny for her beloved Toronto Blue Jays and Amitai is horny for birds of prey. Catch Amitai in the season premiere of Batwoman on October 13th on The CW. Katie-Ellen’s live performance dates are at www.katie-ellen.com/shows. Episode extras at http://www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog
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This week your hosts huddle up to chat outsourcing decisions and what happens when you get what you want. Amitai is horny for a beautiful cityscape while Katie is horny for performing in venues that require a vaccine passport. Extras at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog
There is everything that came before Sept 17th, 2021 and the new dawn that came after the day Lil Nas X dropped the smash debut album Montero. In keeping with tradition of Horny OFF MAIN being (“unofficially”) a Lil Nas X tribute show your hosts could not help but dedicate this episode to their undying horniness for the man, the album and everything it represents to them. (NOTE: You do NOT have to listen to Montero to mess with this album. But you definitely should. It’s beautiful.) Extras at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog
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This week, Amitai and Katie-Ellen are joined by the eldest of Ami's oft mentioned siblings. They discuss politics (don't forget to vote!), growing up nerdy, and of course, Joseph and The Amazing Technicolor Dream Coat themed Bar Mitzvahs. As always, extras at http://www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
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Your hosts virtually huddle up to breathe deeply through their nuts (#sexenergy), consult with their corner man and share a very special episode for mothers (specifically Amitai’s). We love ya. This week Katie-Ellen is horny for fresh school supplies while Ami is horny for the Victoria/Vancouver Island arts community. Extras at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
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This week, Katie-Ellen asks the age old question “is it collective global grief or is this cell phone sales process excruciating?” while Amitai gets poetic about the virtue of being kinda mean. The pair bond over butt pics, classic Jay-Z and their love of HOM listeners. Amitai is horny for the movie “Sound of Metal” and Katie is horny for an ultra old shark. Extras at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog
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For the 52nd weekly episode, your horny hosts reflect on 1 full strange and wonderful (read: horny) year with y’all. Plus they talk working partnerships, contraband candy and adapting to things going well. This week Amitia is horny for seeing the inside of other people’s homes and Katie is horny for coverage of the Paralympic Games. Shout out to former guest of the pod Steph Dixon, currently in Tokyo supporting Canada’s athletes. Extras at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog
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This week Amitai and Katie-Ellen gather from separate dreamscapes to chat sophomore slump smooches, strange perceptions and sleeping butt-to-butt. Plus, was Ami a drug dealer in high school? Find out! Katie-Ellen is horny for passive aggressive customer service announcements while Amitai is horny for being in a city you don’t live in. Special assistance this week from comedian Matt Basky. Bonus content is at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
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This week Amitai and Katie-Ellen huddle up in the digital blanket fort for spooky stories about a super scary monster: rejection. Plus fun chats about compliments, post-marriage make-outs and the glory of Lou Diamond Phillips. Ami is horny for involuntary reactions while Katie is horny for the T.V. show A.P. Bio. As always, extra content is at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
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Amitai and Katie-Ellen are star-eyed and unabashedly fan out over this week’s guest, from the Canadian Forces Snowbirds (and Katie’s storied bush party past), Captain Avert Pyne. Ave shares his experience flying in the 431 Air Demonstration Squadron, his transition to civilian life, the perils of being “too tall,” money woes and more. This is a special one. Catch Avert and the rest of the squad at the Abbotsford Air Show this Friday August 6th, 2021. The show runs Aug 6th-8th and is presented drive-in style. For tickets and info, visit https://abbotsfordairshow.com/. As always, episode extras at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
Amitai and Katie-Ellen bring some sweet island energy to this ep where they huddle up to talk career passion and pre-trip self-care plus make an argument in praise of delusion. This week Amitai is horny for “gross” food while Katie gets nostalgically horny for root beer popsicles. Check out extras and more info at www.katie-ellen.com/blog.
Amitai and Katie-Ellen welcome their first in-person guest back to the couch and get into a good one that touches on everything from talent and birthdays to “dude powder” and reincarnation (plus a little light ire at the moon for good measure. Extra content on Sean and on everything we discussed can be found at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
Oh boi. Amitai & Katie-Ellen take to the couch to try to figure out how to trust their instincts and to chat hallucinogens, drunk elephants and attraction scarcity. This week Amitai is horny for “PAUSE with Sam Jay”, Katie-Ellen is horny for “Words” the debut comedy album from comedian Rojo Perez.
Katie-Ellen will perform live at Kino Cafe Saturday July 17th and in Victoria at Canoe Brewpub (presented by Comedy Here Often) Victoria July 26th & 27th. Click here for tickets and info. You can catch Amitai in the hilarious new Apple TV show Schmigadoon with Keegen-Michael Key and Cecily Strong. As always, get more info and extras at https://www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
Your beloved hosts are back in the virtual blanket fort this week. They discuss Fun Uncles, 98 cent stores, and 80's themed costume parties. Katie-Ellen is overwhelmed with horniness for Vancouver Island and Amitai is horny for flowers. As always, come get your extras at http://www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog
Amitai and Katie-Ellen bring you their trademark slumber party vibes direct from a King bed this week as B.C/the Pacific NorthWest endures the Heat Dome. The pair share some giggles over racoons, the “fuck or fight principle” and practice dates. Katie-Ellen is horny for comically upbeat baristas while Amitai is horny for watching dumb movies in the theatre with his friends. Bless. Stay cool out there, local Hornettes. As always, extras at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog
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It’s an action packed ep, in that anything at all happened to hosts Katie-Ellen and Amitai, who share about their experience on the double date no one asked for. They also discuss courting change and the importance of appetizer consent. This week Amitai is horny for the newsletter “Unsnackable” by folu while Katie-Ellen is horny for the experience of watching sports with other people. Bonus content for this episode can be found at https://www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
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Comedy insider and creator/host of the podcast “My Dad Stole My Limelight” Lauren Deborah joins us this week to talk throuple goals, demisexuality and the immaculate beauty of Henry Winkler. Season 2 of Lauren’s Podcast drops June 29th. You can listen to Season 1 now wherever you get your podcasts. Check out “My Dad Stole My Limelight” on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/mdsmlpod/. As always, bonus content for this episode is at https://www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
This week, reluctant heroes Amitai and Katie-Ellen tackle masculinity (prob solved it, nbd), the social capital of being reckless and the importance of a strong neck. Amitai struggles to summon horniness but ultimately gets it going for Bo Burnham’s Netflix Special “Inside,” while Katie-Ellen is fit to burst with horniness for the Tyler Mahan Coe podcast “Cocaine and Rhinestones.” As always, extra content is at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
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Hot episode fuelled by vengeance. HOM hosts Amitai and Katie-Ellen talk nemesis, giving yourself permission to suck at stuff and the power of Beyoncé dance. This week Katie is horny for vaccination staff and volunteers. Amitai is horny for women’s clothing. As always, extras at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
HOM hosts Amitai and Katie-Ellen huddle up this week to talk New York Energy, the Sunday Scaries and posting butt on the ‘gram. They also consider whether Katie-Ellen should have learned the saxophone, whether they should start a “platonic couple looks for third” dating profile and other truly chaotic endeavours. This week Amitai is horny for Time Travel while Katie-Ellen is horny for the book “Little Fish” by Casey Plett. As always, bonus content and extras at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
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Your HOM hosts get into it this week when they wrestle with infinite timelines, early birthdays and whether Amitai’s fate as fuckboi is written in the stars. Katie introduces Amitai to a loveable 80’s robot and they continue their legacy of talking sports for non-sports folks. On this episode Amitai is horny for the talents of Ziwe and her new self-titled show, while Katie-Ellen is horny for her beloved Vancouver Canadians Baseball Club finding a warm reception in their temporary home in Hillsboro Oregon this season. Extras at https://www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
It’s a 5-Star episode this week when HOM hosts Amitai and Katie-Ellen tackle thank you notes, how to define success and the Ben Affleck of it all. Amitai is horny for personalized notes on food delivery while Katie-Ellen is horny for her new Dickies Coveralls. As always you can find extras at www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
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Your HOM hosts are joined this week by poet, actor and beautiful soul Danielle Janess. The trio discuss Amitai’s fear of poetry, how to celebrate during a pandemic and self-soothing with the BBC. This episode truly asks, if your nipple could talk, what would it say? Danielle is horny for gardening and home reno shows while Ami and Katie and horny as all heck for Danielle’s new book of poetry, The Milk of Amnesia.
Join your hosts this Saturday at “SHOW OFF GO OFF: VII – May, As Well”, the Online Comedy Variety Show hosted by Katie-Ellen featuring comedian DeAnne Smith. Tickets and info at www.SOGOTIX.com
Due to a fun little health scare, the bubble buds are back on the virtual couch this week (everyone is feeling much better now, thank you). Amitai and Katie-Ellen discuss tugboats, service sector work, and trying not to worry your loved ones. This week Katie-Ellen is horny for the staff at the covid testing clinic and Amitai is horny for knowing someone's voice without knowing their appearance.
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It’s a classic couch episode. Hosts Amitai and Katie-Ellen connect over shared crushes, sacred books and the general chaos of being alive. You’ll want to put this episode on your to-do list. This week Katie-Ellen is horny for the scent of sunscreen and Amitai is horny for running fast. Check out special extras at https://www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog
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How fitting on our Tim Riggins (#33) episode we welcome another legendary Tim, comedian Tim Gray, who joins us to talk bottomless fries, topless dancers and the sanctity of marriage. Amitai and Katie-Ellen are both horny as heck for Tim and for the sketch group he's part of "Hunks" who have a brand new album out now, "Mouth Beef," check it out here: https://hunkscomedy.bandcamp.com/releases. As always, links and extras at https://www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog
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Hosts Amitai and Katie-Ellen get right into it this week with talk of all things nudes – sending, receiving, taking, deleting – plus, do you employ proper nude etiquette? They also talk text style, body confidence and Amitai waxes poetic about the amount of flaccid dick he’s seen. In addition to this uncharacteristically horny content, Amitai is horny for singing group “The Quarantettes” and Katie-Ellen is horny for Starlee Kine, with a special shout out to The B-Bots Crew.
This special episode features 1 member of Order of Canada, 1 member of Canada Sports Hall of Fame, 1 member of B.C. Sports Hall of Fame, 1 Paralympic multi-medallist and World Record Holder – all of whom are the wonderful Stephanie Dixon; also Katie-Ellen and Amitai are there. Steph joins the Bubble Buds to talk shame, pit hair, Vikings, strip chess and to generally delight with her beautiful humour and heart. To know Steph is to love her and both Katie and Ami are horny as hell for this talk. Get extras on the blog at https://www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
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The HOM Bubble Buds are unbubbled this while Amitai’s in self-isolation, but the silliness continues with talk of toenails, co-habitation and a billion dollar tech app idea to get away from it all. On this episode Amitai is horny for his Mother’s new passion for painting and Katie is horny for an extra-long phone charger. Plus Katie shares the recent gifts from her elderly neighbour. See picks and other extras at https://www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
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Your HOM Hosts bubble up for a fun episode where they chat formative ‘90’s movies, Katie-Ellen’s personal definition of “Pan Sexual” and why it’s better to have an unrequited crush than vice versa. This week Katie is horny for therapy, while Amitai is horny (not in that way) for Selena Gomez. (They are also horny this week and always for Rufio & Benjamin Franklin "Benny the Jet" Rodriguez.) Check out the blog for more info and episode extras: https://www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
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In today’s ep, the Bubble Buds are back to talk about Katie-Ellen’s case of the Marchies, Amitai’s case of pandemic privilege, and the inherent dorkiness of hobbies. Katie-Ellen explains what Highland games are and Ami cops to his romantic death wish. This week, Katie-Ellen is horny for the new Lola Bunny and Amitai is horny for the YouTube channel Solid Content (https://youtube.com/c/SolidContent). Make sure to get your tickets for SHOW OF GO OFF, Katie’s Online Comedy Variety Show on March 13th. Tickets are by donation to Swan Vancouver. Info at https://www.eventbrite.com/e/show-off-go-off-v-sogo-march-2021-edition-tickets-143909744921
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HOM hosts Amitai and Katie-Ellen are joined this week by hilarious comedian and beloved pal Sunee Dhaliwal to talk sneakers, language, battle rap and meeting Drake. Plus the trio ask, when did you first buy moisturizer? Sunee is horny for a YouTube show about the WWE VS TNA Monday night war. Amitai and Katie-Ellen are horny to talk to someone besides themselves (especially someone so wonderful). Follow Sunee on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/sunnydcomedy/ and don’t forget to get your tickets for this month’s SHOW OF GO OFF, Katie’s Online Comedy Variety Show on March 13th. Tickets are by donation to Swan Vancouver. Info at https://www.eventbrite.com/e/show-off-go-off-v-sogo-march-2021-edition-tickets-143909744921
On this episode, your HOM hosts talk Ocean vs Space, animals that seem mythical, Amitai’s experience filming a Western and ROMO (Relief Over Missing Out). The pair also launch an exciting artistic endeavour in foot puppetry. This week Amitai is horny for Descriptive Audio while Katie is horny for people playing music from their personal device out loud in public. Don’t forget to check out more info on all the episodes at https://www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
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On this besties ep, Amitai and Katie-Ellen delve into their status as “Reformed Haters”, what it takes to be successful and how to care less. They also ask the question “is Katie’s head too small for showbiz?” This week Amitai is horny for Feng Shui Tik Tok while Katie is horny for the TV show “Superstore” (and her days as a department store cashier). Don’t forget, you can find extra content about each episode at https://www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog.
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Bubble Buds Amitai and Katie-Ellen are joined this week by the immensely sexy and talented Hank Pine, creator of the HOM theme music and countless other masterpieces spanning music, theatre, visual art, performance art, comics, comedy and more (if ya didn’t love him you’d hate him for all that talent). The trio talk journals, sex playlists and what it means to be successful. Plus, Amitai reveals the first glimpse into his “Muppets to Bang” list and Hank joins in with his Big Kermit Energy (BKE). Check out Hank’s albums at https://hankpine.bandcamp.com/ and follow him on Twitter @PineHank.
Don’t forget to get your ticket to the upcoming live online comedy variety show, “SHOW OFF GO OFF IV: Zoom is for Lovers” February 13th at 7pm PST. Tickets are by donation of any amount. Proceeds to PSH Community Services Society.
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Best bubble buds Amitai and Katie-Ellen take to the digital blanket fort to trade tales of pandemic depresh, body swap technology, wish names, and how to tell when it’s Spring (hint: it’s when the titties sprout). Amitai issues a challenge to the listener to uncover an uncool Zach while Katie wishfully declares herself a real “Zoey Deschanel” type. This week Amitai is horny for sports announcers while Katie-Ellen is horny for Verzuz Sports.
Don’t forget to get your ticket to the upcoming live online comedy variety show, “SHOW OFF GO OFF IV: Zoom is for Lovers” February 13th at 7pm PST. Tickets are by donation of any amount. Proceeds to PSH Community Services Society.
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Amitai and Katie-Ellen get in some quality couch time this week where they talk personalized keychains, gay representation on TV and how Katie feels real Felicity these days. They dig into the difference between direct and indirect communication and Ami launches a campaign to normalize couples not saying “I love you” at the same time. Don’t forget to check out the blog, https://www.hornyoffmainpod.com/blog for episode recaps and extra content.
The next SHOW OFF GO OFF, “SOGO IV: Zoom is for lovers”, Katie-Ellen’s live online comedy variety show is coming up this Saturday February 13th (Katie’s birthday!). Tickets are by donation to the PHS Community Services Society, a non-profit that supports housing, harm reduction, overdose prevention and more on Vancouver’s Downtown Eastside. Ticket link and info at: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/show-off-go-off-iv-zoom-is-for-lovers-sogo-february-2021-edition-tickets-137216533345.
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This week’s episode is a real “pile of dames” as your bubble bud hosts Amitai and Katie-Ellen (“Sir Katie-Ellen Humphries” if you’re regal) delve into superpowers, pandemic comedy specials and resentment when professional athletes are good actors. In a move that is as timely as it is creepy with the announcement of the Muppet Show coming to Disney+ in Feb, Katie asks Ami which Muppets he would fuck and it gets weirder from there. Sorry? This week Amitai is horny for his best pants and Katie-Ellen is horny for bamboo sheets.
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Your HOM hosts are thrilled to welcome comedian, writer, producer and all around love bug Abdul Aziz, who puts aside being star-struck to share an incredible list of beautiful “off main” things. The trio also talk pranks, lies, sleeve garters, Teen Wolf and religion and everyone is horny for Abdul’s comedy D&D podcast Spout Lore. This episode also includes the first of what is sure to be Abdul’s famously bad intros and the first reveal of the pet name Katie has for the sweet and beloved Horny OFF MAIN listeners.
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Your resident Bubble Buds Amitai and Katie-Ellen bubble up for another episode, this time to tackle the fear around sharing things you love, family movie nights (RIP Blockbuster), and when things are so beautiful it makes you mad. This week Amitai is horny for being coy and Katie-Ellen has period drama – literally, she’s horny for Bridgerton on Netflix. As always we Remember the Titans.
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In this episode, your host BFFs explore the limits of that moniker and delve into what it means to be non-romantic partners. In the final hours of 2020 they also dance with the ghost of New Year’s Eve past (spoiler: Katie’s teen years were sweetly a bummer) and count down the Top 10 Horniest Things of 2020. What are yours? This week/year/lifetime, Amitai and Katie-Ellen are both horny for the incredible listeners and everyone who has engaged with the show. Happy New Year, y’all.
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This time it’s different…because we’re joined by one half of the great new podcast “This Time It’s Different”and sketch comedy duo “Peter & Chris” -the hilarious Peter Carlone. Peter slides into the digital tree fort to discuss chores, balding and whether he and Katie ever went on a date. Plus, the trio consider sponsoring little league teams, why everyone thinks Katie’s a killjoy and how to let go of some furious anger fun.
Amitai is horny for small talk, Katie-Ellen is horny for the band Eve6, and everyone’s horny for Peter’s show. Tune in for a tip top episode and check out Peter’s video podcast “This Time It’s Different.”
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Amitai and Katie-Ellen explore Amitai’s continuing adventures in online not dating, tackle the easy question “is Amitai a catch?” and the more mysterious quandary “what is it like to be professionally good looking?” They unpack the difference between being attractive and hot and also how having a body is a blessing and a burden. This week the pair are horny for terrible baby announcements.
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Amitai and Katie-Ellen huddle up in the digital blanket fort again this week to chat love languages, Ryan Gosling and work crushes. Amitai has an idea for a screenplay and Katie-Ellen reveals her long-held bias against tall men. This week the pair are horny for the talents of the incredible rapper/musican/artist Kimmortal. Check them out at https://kimmortalportal.com or at https://kimmortal.bandcamp.com/.
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This week Amitai and Katie-Ellen huddle up for some couch time and feel all the better for it. The pair talk things you thought were extravagant as a kid, the value of denial, what’s in a drawer and what was the Pied Piper’s deal? Katie is ready and willing to sell out for that duck phone money and they find a perfect new nickname for Ami.
PLUS...
Amitai is horny for a new scent and Katie-Ellen is horny for the independent radio station Stranger Radio, in particular the show “The Underduck” hosted by friend of the pod Thom Prior, aka Estea Elements. Check out all the programming at strangerradio.com and check the show page at https://www.strangerradio.com/theunderduck.
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Amitai and Katie-Ellen welcome comedian, author, podcaster and dreamboat Alicia Tobin to talk outrageous rider dreams, people’s misconceptions about comedians, David Foster, the experience of putting out vulnerable art and more. Also Amitai is outraged to learn of an unknown nickname of Katie’s and Katie reveals embarrassing nicknames of his. Check out Alicia’s book “So You’re a Little Sad, So What?”and check her out on Twitter.
Also, get tickets to Katie’s upcoming online comedy variety show SHOW OFF GO OFF by donation (of any amount) to WAVAW Rape Crisis Centre.
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Like intrepid Fievel Mousekewitze before them, this week your hosts go on a journey of self-discovery (and mostly discover that they both have a pretty incessant rodent problem.) It’s kinda the pits. But nothing can damper their joy and unfettered adoration of Lil Nas X or the celebration of his latest release. Amitai is horny for friendship silliness and Katie-Ellen announces her upcoming Online Comedy Variety Show & Fundraiser for WAVAW Rape Crisis Center.
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Amitai and Katie-Ellen are joined this week by Occupational Hygienist and Epidemiologist Dr. Cheryl Peters to talk advice, award shows and what it’s like to be an Epidemiologist with a special research study in the spread of scientific misinformation during a pandemic. Katie-Ellen & Cheryl connect over being adults who get baby diseases and Amitai is horny for fast friendship.
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Content Warning: This episode contains conversation about depression and suicide/suicidal ideation just past the 45 minute mark. Amitai and Katie-Ellen join the rest of North America (and much of the world) on tenterhooks in the anxious grey area of uncertainty. The pair chat coping mechanisms for anxiety and depression and Amitai gets way off main with some personal experiences they’d both like to see talked about more on main, i.e. some discussion they would like to see more normalized. This week your hosts are horny for the hilarious high-quality pop culture Podcast “Pop This!” with hosts Andrea Warner & Lisa Christiansen and producer Andrea Gin, make believe relationships, Jason Derulo, life and YOU.
Crisis Services Available 24/7
Canadian Crisis Line: 1-833 456-4566
U.S. Crisis Line: 1-800-273-8255
The Trevor Project LGBTQ+ Led/Centered Support: 1-866-488-7386
Amitai and Katie-Ellen get together for another best friend fest and get way off main with a sleeper style confession, gender envy and Julia Roberts all couched within new couch talk. Amitai is horny to lose and also for Katie-Ellen’s debut comedy album Ladyfingerout now and available wherever you get your music. Download or Stream the Album Here.
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Your HOM hosts revel in one another’s company (to a concerning degree). Katie contemplates retirement, they have a reboot pitch for “Wife Swap,” talk kosher candy, a life in the arts & Amitai vows to die empty. Brought to you unofficially by Suntory Roku Gin. On this episode everyone is peak horny for Katie-Ellen’s debut standup comedy album that dropped on Tuesday. Download or stream it now: https://800pgr.lnk.to/humphriesWE
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Amitai and Katie-Ellen welcome actor and writer Mack Gordon to the virtual blanket fort for tales of Amitai "meet cutes", hot dogs, game nights, gossip and “government officials” that can get fucked. Check out Mack’s upcoming live, online theatre event, War of the Worlds, at https://www.theatreinthedark.com/. As always, more info about your hosts and the show at https://www.hornyoffmainpod.com/
Katie-Ellen's debut standup album Ladyfingeris available for pre-order now at https://800PGR.lnk.to/humphriesID.
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Classic twosome again this week. Amitai and Katie-Ellen reflect on reactions to the show, colouring books, vacationing (and how Katie is borderline incapable of it) and have yet another app idea for horny singles. Plus, Katie reads the greatest piece of entertainment journalism ever published on the World Wide Web. This week the gang is horny for disloyalty and the podcast What Did I Miss? With MJ Bourque.
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Amitai has a health scare and the pair dive into some off main medical stuff. They also cover Amitai’s superpower, the name you leave for take-out orders and the emo sound of one eye crying. This episode asks the question: is lesbian sex less of sin (or just more awesome) and tells Bellingham to suck it.
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Amitai and Katie-Ellen get back to their gab sess roots with this no-guest episode, where they fittingly discuss not having a date. The pair tackle Singlehood, also Hallmark movies, East Coast Canadian accents, Shark Tank vs Dragons Den and Amitai declares spanking Covid friendly. The episode is brought to you by Fatso Peanut Butter. They’re not a sponsor but Katie shouts them out in the ep and is just a fan. Check ‘em out https://eatfatso.com/.
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Comedian, Nascar fan and sass mouthed sweetheart Matty Vu joins Amitai and Katie-Ellen as the three of them explore how much they can lean on charm. Amitai tends to his garden and it bums Katie out, Matty tries to teach Katie how to cleanse her life, and Katie pleads with country music to be gay already.
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Brilliant and talented actor, musician and screenwriter Marlene G. joins Amitai and Katie-Ellen and the trio dive into their “Scrooge McDuck Fantasies,” Amitai’s fear of paperwork, the sound of “hot stupidity” and how much Marlene truly doesn’t wanna be on the show. Stick around to find out why AND what’s in the Mystery Box.
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In which Amitai and Katie-Ellen fawn over their first guest, hilarious comedian Henok Meresa. The trio discuss horny quarantine, World of Warcraft, what it means to be “embracist” and Katie gets close to tears twice (a personal record). This episode the gang is horny for Zach Efron and accessible public washrooms.
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Chronicles of a reformed Soft Boi. Your hosts have a can’t miss app idea, they revise the “sexual bases”, tell tandem bikes to suck it, design Amitai’s tombstone and Ami brings up “crush energy” for the first of what is sure to be countless times. Don’t miss this Hot Box Special.
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Amitai and Katie-Ellen discuss how old they were the first time they heard the word “Feminism.” Ami tries to teach Katie the joy of being sad. Your hosts discuss the merit of short-term change for long-term gain and Amitai is horny to disrupt the gender binary.
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Welcome to the Podcast. Feel free to leave your shoes on. A quick introduction to the show by your hosts, Amitai Marmorstein and Katie-Ellen Humphries. Get a feel for the show and what you can expect. Check out more about show at www.hornyoffmainpod.com.
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