Yes Offense: Recent Episodes
yesoffense
Yes Offense is a comedy podcast, created and hosted by stand up comedian, Alex Tomaselli. Every week, Tomaselli and other comedians riff and rant about everything and anything going on in the world they find interesting. TRIGGER WARNING This podcast will feature graphic language about sex, race, violence, and other subjects that should ALL BE TAKEN AS AN ATTEMPT TO BE FUNNY!!! Also known as jokes. This is a comedy podcast so read the name again and if you don't like it, you don't have to listen. Enjoy!
These two dorks made it to the pod. We talk about race relations, Riyadh‘s dad, and why Riad doesn’t like kissing. Riyad really steers this episode into the ground. He doesn’t really, but you’ll see.
Subscribe and tell a friend so race relations will get better in this country
Follow these dudes @mayanryan and @ryhaadcarrol
It’s another LADIES episode. Alaina Bamfield is back along with newcomer to the pod, Connor Mead. We talk about Lizzie McGuire, shaved heads, and a bunch of sex stuff as always.
Please subscribe and tell other folks so I can meet Hilary Duff one day.
Follow these 2 @alainabamfieldconedy and @connormeadian
Sorry for no video this week guys! It’s still a hilarious episode, though! Declan Brooks came by along with a young buck in the game, Trevor Gerald. We recorded this on Juneteenth. That’s all you need to know.
Follow these dudes @declanlovesmeatballs and @spacecadettrev
This week we got 2 new guests on the pod… again! Andy Malafarina and Miguel Silva are in the house to talk some craziness. We discuss redlining, going schizophrenic, and how the CIA had influenced all the bad things ever.
Please subscribe and tell other folks so we can get big enough where the CIA tries to use us to destabilize the country.
Follow these 2 @andymalafarina and @likekoolaid and check out their podcasts, “Dork Court” and “Panties in the Mouth,” “Drag the Lake” and “No More Heroes”
This week we got 2 new guests on the pod! Sheri Ciprane and Brad Rickert stop by to talk gross sex stuff mostly, being straight in Bushwick, and Sheri broke her pelvis in a crazy way
Please subscribe and tell other folks so I can be straight in a better NYC borough
Follow these 2 @sheribaby11 and @bradaintfunny and check out their show, The Pimp Daddy podcast
We got broads back on the pod baby!! Mae Planert and Kelly Taylor were nice enough to sit down and listen to my nonsense. We talk pyramid schemes, what “scenes” make movies great, and crimes we may or may not have committed.
Please subscribe and tell a friend so I can stop maybe committing crimes.
Follow these ladies @mae_planert @hellothisiskelly and peep their podcasts Risqué Business and I Feel Fat Today
Ryan O’Toole and showed up to gig once that ended up being canceled and ended up talking about The Wire for over an hour. That essentially happens here with some extra talk about Boston and New York. Enjoy!
Check out my dude @itsryanotoole and his podcast, The Ryan O’Toole podcast
Hey guys! Joe Gorman and I are back on the couch talking nonsense. This is our new pod where we'll be talking about mad nerdy stuff while I try to dodge Joe's baseless allegations against me. We'll eventually make a separate channel, but we'll upload it here for now. Let us know what you think so far and if there's any other comedians you'd want to see as guests in the future. Follow me @sillyselli and Joe @joewgorman
We’re back at GAS Digital studio again with the homies, Natalie DeCicco, Blind Mike, and Kevin Sanchez. Kevin shows up late, we run long, and it was recorded the day it should have been posted.
Please subscribe and tell a friend. I promise to get a grip on this shit.
Follow my dudes @kevinsanchezvalid @nataliedecicco_edits @thatblindmike
Stephen Bolles and Max Carney both made their debuts in the pod this week. I met Max literally before he did the show and you can’t really tell because it’s such a hilariously fun episode. We talk fights, drugs, girls, all the regular nonsense.
Please subscribe and tell a friend so I can do Rogan one day.
Follow my dudes @mclonghair @mazcarney and check out Stephen’s special, “Stephen Bolles, Stephen Please” on YouTube
Joe Gorman return to the pod for a solo episode. We talk about comic book movies, cheating on our wives, and the meaning of life.
Please subscribe and tell your friends about the pod so I can afford the rent that just got raised.
Follow my dude @joewgorman and check out his other pod “Buff Boys”
Dane Rothenberg is back on the pod along with Ron Ervin making his debut! we talk our obsession with certain video games, relationships with bigger women, and crazy unhealthy recipes.
Sorry for the short hiatus. It’s been a weird few weeks. This episode really was a lot of fun though so hope you guys enjoy it.
Please subscribe and tell your friends about the podcast so we can start a cult and resurrect Cthulhu
Check out these dudes @dane.rothenbuerg @ronervin and check out their podcast, Bottom Text, available on anywhere you listen to pods
Nick Carra blesses the pod with retiring guest, Ryhaad Carroll. We talk about shark fishing, moshing at rap concerts, and Katt Williams makes a guest appearance.
Please subscribe, share, and tell your friends about the pod so we can get I. Shannon Sharp one day.
Took a trip deep into Brooklyn to meet up with Chris Faga for this episode! We talk a lot about comic books, old-school teachers, and how Johnny Quest is racist.
Please subscribe and share this surround with your friends, so I can afford to drive into Brooklyn instead of take my bike.
Follow this dude @chrisfrombkln and check out his podcasts, High Society Radio and Notes of a Goon.
Dean David and Alex pisch return to the pod again! Dean had to leave about 36 minutes in but Alex and I wrap up the pod after figuring out some technical difficulties. We talk New Year’s Eve 2023, Saltburn, and taking your mom to a comedy show.
Please share and subscribe wherever you listen
and I’m so successful, someone tries to Saltburn me one day
Follow these dudes @alexpischera @deandavid95 @aggressivleychillcomedy
What up nerds! Mike Recine was kind enough to bless the pod this week. We’ve never really met, but that didn’t stop us from talking about going to the movies alone, our experiences with traveling in Italy, and the ole popcorn trick.
Please share and subscribe wherever you listen so I can leave Bushwick one day.
Follow Mike @mikerecinecomedy
Stacked episode this week! We got David Bakker, Alexis Ramirez, and Ryan Peterson on the pod.It’s hilarious. Honestly, the holidays have been crazy and I completely forgot to clip or relished to this to figure out the description. I just remember having a great time recording this episode and laughing a lot. I think you will too. Please like share and tell your friends about the pod so one of you eventually subscribes. Thanks for real though. Follow these dudes @davidbakker7 @asapabgry_ @mayanryan
Paddy Dufino is back along with the very funny Michael Good. We talk crazy Halloween costumes, bullying “the far right”, and Godzilla Minus One.
Please share and subscribe or you’re a lame.
Follow these dude @paddy_is_funky and @michaelgoodcomedy
This week Joe Gorman was nice enough to fill-in for a guest that dropped out along with the very funny Kelly Taylor. We talk about road gigs, crying during The Sopranos, and the manifestation of attractivenes. None of this is as serious as you think it is.
Please follow these 2 @joewgorman @hellothisiskelly
My dude, Kevin said she has blessed the pod this week. We were supposed to have another guest, but Kevin really filled both spots. That’s not a pun on the subjects we talked about today, which were being fat, dating fat women, and our relationships with our mothers.
Please like share and subscribe so we never have to date fat chicks again.
Follow this dude @kevinsanchezvalid and check out the Doped Up podcast
When I recorded this, I was on the road with the very funny Zac Amico. We were up in Saratoga Springs, where we essentially went on a date, stayed at a very shady motel, and had ate like 10 years olds. All of this is documented in the pod amongst other hilarious nonsense.
Follow this dude at @zacisnotfunny can you check out his podcasts Zac Amico’s Midnight Spook show and Real Ass Podcast
Sam Lichtenstein and Danny Fallon joined the pod this week to make a special announcement!!
We talk addiction, religion, and intrusive thoughts. It’s a wild one.
Please subscribe and share the pod around, so the intrusive thoughts don’t come true.
Follow these dudes and check out their sketches @thewanderingjewman @dannyfallonhaha
Father Sheehan returns to the podcast along with legend, Matt Maren. That shows up late, so Bobby wraps for a bit, and then we finally get into a bunch of stuff about sex, wrestling, and being gay.
Check out these dudes @realmatttmaran and @bobbyshehanlol
Natalie DeCicco and Gay Blind Mike return to the pod again! We try to figure out if there are non-horror Halloween movies, I explain how Italian beaches are different than ours, and we reveal the regrets we teased on our previous episode. It’s funny and sad. Also, the video dies like 10 minutes before the podcast ends so my bad.
Please share and subscribe so that these regrets mean less and less overtime.
Follow these 2 @nataliedecicco_edits and @thatblindmike
Audio only episode this time guys. Sorry for the inconvenience. I accidentally film this in 4K to eat up a lot of room on the camera. However, this week we got the very funny Robbie Goodwin and Joe Gorman on the pod. It’s very funny. I don’t think we noticed the videos fucked up until 40 minutes in so that’s the prime spots to listen to.
Like, share, and subscribe, so I feel less bad about these mistakes.
Follow these dudes @robbiegoodwin and @joewgorman
My two favorite rappers are back on the pod. Gambit and Sid Floyd met up with me when I doing shows in Connecticut. We talk about celebrity look-alike’s, messing with teachers in high school, and how to be more Zen.
Please like share and subscribe, so I myself can be more Zen.
Follow these dudes @gambitraps and @sid_floyd
Also, check out Village in the Shed podcast
Miles Toe and Lawrence Reese joined the pod this week and holy shit. I barely get a word in because these dudes are so hilarious and wild that I just let them rock. We talk about barbershops, voodoo curses, and surprisingly on a more serious note, God.
Please like share and subscribe so you too can be in Gods good graces.
Follow these dudes @myles_toe and @lawrencereese
David Klash returns to the podcast this week with a different face. Along with him is DC Williams. Together, we talk about what happened to David‘s face, getting suspended and expelled, and wide Blade rules.
Subscribe, share, and tell your friends about the pod. If you don’t, I hope you get attacked just like David did.
Follow these dudes @davidklash47 and @dcwilliamscomedy
We got ladies back on the pod! Sarah Barnitt and Chloe Fimiano make their debut. We talk identical twins being weird, childhood fantasies that won’t go away, and how dudes suck sometimes too.
Like, share, and subscribe to whatever so I can afford my nice apt.
Follow these ladies @sarahbarnitt and @bae_romano
This week I went to Gas Digital Studios in New York City to do a podcast with the infamous Gay Blind Mike and Natalie Decicco. I'm writing this before listening to the episode so I forgot what we talked about, but these guys were some fo my favorite guests since I've moved to the city. Enjoy!
GO follow them @thatblindmike @nataliedecicco_edits
Patrick Mckinstry and Mike Gray are both back on the pod. This episode I was up in Auburn Maine headlining one of my first out of state gigs. We ended up eating a shit ton of edibles and about the 40 minute mark, they really kicking so watch out for that. Also, about 20 minutes and there is a power outage, but that doesn’t stop us from having a great time.
Like, share, and subscribe so that I can afford these trips, moving forward.
Follow these dudes @patastic and @mike.gray.comedian
This week I had 2 hilarious new guests, Ilya Laskin and Bobby Sheehan. We talk about H.P. Lovecraft’s cat, aliens being real, and how slutty moms can be.
Please listen, share, and subscribe where you can so I can afford drugs.
My man, Ryan Peterson, just moved to NY so I had to get him on the pod again with newcomer to the pod, Zack DiDinato. We talk about seeing the Death Grips live, subway creatures, and how Ryan looks like Chris D’elia.
Please like, share, and subscribe so we can get his big as Chris D’elia., without being predators. So maybe not as big.
Follow these dudes @zack_didonato and @mayanryan
This week Joe Gorman and Stephen Wolff dropped by the pod. We talked about which Ninja Turtle we would be, how Stephen had sex with his neighbor, and Joe constantly twists words make us look like sexual criminals.
Please like, share, and write a review where you can so this can inevitably cancel us.
Follow these dudes @joewgorman and @stevenwolff and checkout Joe’s podcast, Locker Room Talk.
2 dudes I knew before we all had moved to NYC, Andrew Manning and Jonathan Tillson, are back on the pod. We talk bears, Jonah Hill, and E.T. porn. Again, something for everyone.
Share, subscribe, and write a review where you can so we can date clout chasing surfer chicks.
Follow these dudes @andrewmanthing and @jonathantillson. Also, check out John’s YouTube show with Alan Fitzgerald, “Explaining Things, on YouTube.
Dean’s back! The most reoccurring single guest returns to talk about the most important things in life like haggling with bodega workers, the new Spider-Man movie, and why he has “that look” in his eyes all the time.
Like, subscribe, and write a review where you can so we can get some light back in our eyes.
Follow this dude @deandavid95 and check out his show, Aggressively Chill, every Tuesday at Gold Sounds in Brooklyn, NY.
Topics: Bic lighter, crimes, foose ball, sex, drugs, vampires. NYC, Spider-Man, movies, Marvel, DC, Pokémon, Emotions, Relationships, etc.
Cooper Gavin was passing thru NYC so you know we had to have him on the pod this week. We talk about our run ins with the homeless, King Kong vs Godzilla, and how we’d commit more crimes 100 years ago.
Like, subscribe, and write a review where you can so we can commit more crimes in this time and get away with it.
Follow this dude @coopedupconversations and check out his pod Cooped Up Conversations
Pete Angelo and Dave Sheehan return to torture me by running every bit into the ground. We talk how Bop It was weird, how Howard the Duck was banging broads, and how Dave and Pete look like heads of the vampire and werewolf councils.
Like, subscribe, and share so I can rid the world of these nocturnal creatures.
This week Ryhaad Carroll joins the podcast again along with newcomer, Dane Rothenberg. We talk about going to a gig in Connecticut, how to properly manscape, and how we thought Collin and Will Ferrel and Collin Farrell were brothers.
Please share and subscribe where you can so I can someday make money off this.
Follow these dudes @dane.rothenberg and @ryhaadcarroll
What a wild episode! Nick Viagas and Roey Rozen bless the pod for the 1st time. We talk the serious issues like autism, sex trafficking, and adrenochrome. All things we are experts in. cough
Like, share, subscribe, and give a review where you can so our expertise is spread to the thinking world.
Follow these dudes @nickviagas and @roeyrozen
Ronnie Smith and UB Thomas join the pod this week. We talk about biking etiquette, the segregation of NYC comedy, and how 9/11 was the result of boredom.
Like, share, subscribe, and give a review where you can so I don’t do gay stuff for money out here.
Check these dudes @therealronniesmith and @ubthomas5th
Logan Ayala is back with 1st timer on the pod, Otter Lee. Logan’s never seen Jurassic Park. Otter is the most likely to get murdered. Im probably gay again.
Like, share, subscribe, and give a review where you can so I can accept my sexuality
Check these dudes @loganayalacomedy and @otterleemoy
This week Eric Asker and Scott Hall join the pod. After not recording he 1st 15 min of audio, we really got into it about marriage, divorce and Nick Cannons kids. Also the video cuts out in the last few min. But hey, ITS FREE!!!
Like, share, subscribe, and give a review where you can so I can eventually make money off of this and pay someone to not make these mistakes.
Check these dudes @ericaskercomwdy and @scothallstandup and their podcast, The 69th Amendment Podcast
Sid Floyd and Mike Nice are back on the pod for the 1st time in video and it was hilarious. We tell stories about the last few times we’ve chilled in NYC and discuss one of the craziest hypotheticals my stoner brain has conjured up.Like, share, subscribe, and give a review where you can so these stories can continue.Follow these dudes @mikenicect and @sid_floyd
CT homies on the pod this week!!! Chris Warren and Mike Massaro join the pod again. We talk history, religion, and once again it turns out that I’m probably gay.Like, share, subscribe, and give a review where you can so I can finally determine if I’m actually gay.Follow these dudes @chriswarrencomwdy and @mike.massaro
Ifyou were watching Yes Offense lately, and thinking, “Man, this pod needs some broads on it.” Well, this is the episode for you. Daniela Mora and Sienna Hubert Ross join the pod for the 1st time. They harass me, belittle me, and apparently want to bang my dad.
Please subscribe, write a review, and tell your friends about the pod. If not, no women will ever be allowed on the podcast again.
Follow these 2 @danielamora1 and @siennahubertross
Dean David is back and he’s joined by Kitty Reynolds making bed Yes Offense debut. We talk about sex, drugs, and the existential crisis that drives you to watch cartoons you enjoyed as child in your late 20s/early 30s.Subscribe, write a review, and tell other people to listen where/whenever you can. If not, our existential dread will continue.Follow these dudes @deandavid95 and @kitreynolds
Youtube: https://youtu.be/wnGDAQpq8gk
Pete Angelo is back along with Aaron Kaplan making his debut in the pod. We talk about crazy funerals, sex with the homeless, and apparently, I’m gayer than Pete. Subscribe, write a review, and tell other people to listen where/whenever you can. It is not, and we die, you can’t come to our cool funerals. Follow these dudes @metalpetecomedy and @aaronkapcomedy
Luke Davis and Frankie Hoy hopped out of the van and onto the pod this week! We talk milk, van life, and fat chicks. Subscribe, write a review, and tell other people to listen where/whenever you can. If not, I hope you have a nice day either way…… Follow these dudes @ld_comedy and @frankie_hoy Also check out their podcast, Keep on Trucking’
Was back in CT recently and had to get the boys, James T Moore and Mike Massaro back on the pod!!! You can tell we had a good time. I think JT says, "This dude is crazy," every 2 minutes.
Subscribe, write a review and tell other people to listen where/whenever you can so these trips are worth it.
Follow these dudes @mike.massaro and @laughmooreent
Comedians Osama Basal and Alaina Bamfield were nice enough to come by for pod this week. We open up in poop and stay on that for awhile. We also go over what constitutes a good handshake, how to wedding crash, and how crazy shit was during the pandemic. Subscribe, write a review, and tell other people to listen where/whenever you can. If not, then I curse you. Follow these dudes @alainabamfieldcomedy and @osamathecomedian
Another CT comic transplant, Andrew Manning, stopped by the pod this week. Did you know elephants could get herpes? We found that out and it’s kinda the theme of this pod.Subscribe, write a review, and tell other people to listen where/whenever you can. If you don’t, a certain elephant with a certain STD is going to pay you a visit.Follow this dude @andrewmanthing
Dean David is back! We did this mad late on a Friday, stoned to the gills. We talk gay stuff, porn stuff, and other stuff. Also, the video cuts out in the last eight minutes. Sorry about that. Please like, share, and subscribe so I can afford a separate camera. Follow this dude @deandavid95
My dudes, Tommy Holder and Paddy Defino, we’re nice enough to let me crash at their place while I found out where to live in New York City, and are again nice enough to come and do my podcast. We talk strange anatomy, the Lord of the Rings racial divides, and crazy shit I’ve seen since moving. Please like, share, and subscribe so I can afford bodega weed. Follow these dudes: Tommy Holder @ltholderv Paddy Defino @paddy_is_funky
1st video pod! LeMaire Lee was nice enough to swing by with Pete Eckenroth and Jake Lipinsky. We talk evil women in movies, The Last of Us vs. Dead Rising, and really go through the original 150 Pokémon.Please like share and subscribe so I can one day afford a studioFollow these dudes:LeMaire Lee @lemaireleePete Eckenroth @peteeckenrothJake Lipinsky @jakelipinsky
I moved to NYC. Pete also moved to NYC months ago. We talk about movies, doing stand up in CT, and the late great Artie Rob.
Please like, share, and subscribe so I can afford to live out here
Follow Pete @metalpetcomedy
Follow the pod @yesoffensepodcast
This is from the same week I was up in NH/ME for shows and did a pod with Mustafe Mussa and Dan Kalwhite. We talk about literature, movies, and the sexual art of soundingLike, share, and subscribe so I can sound all day.Follow these dudes:Mustafe: @misterafeDan Kalwhite: @dannyboy_3030
This week I was up in NH/ME for shows and did a pod with the Shedcast. We talk about the amount of edibles we’re on while recording, all the shenanigans we got into, and how I clogged a toilet at the New Years show.Like, share, and subscribe so I can perform at venues with better plumbing.Follow these dudes:Sid Floyd: @sid_floydMike Nice: @mikenicectJeffery Doomer: @jefferydoomerShedTech: shedtech8
This week was super hectic, but hilarious! I did this pod with Matt Lopes, Ben Kirsch, and Dan Kalwhite at a bar. We talk about Matt not knowing where New Hampshire is and have a take on the Silver Surfer you won’t read in Marvel comics.Like, rate, subscribe, and share this around with people who are as deranged as you and I.Follow these dudes:Matt @notmattlopesBen @bennyboy_28
Mike Massaro returns along with Lila Sparks and Patrick McKinstry. Pat talks a little more, a lot of porn talk in this one, and the DMT aliens are racist. Please like, subscribe, and write a review where you can. Tell your friends. Do it so we can get anything out of the comedy nonsense. Follow these dudes: Mike @mike.massaro Lila @lilasparks_ Pat @patricks_waysee
Yes Offense Ep. 80 is up on YouTube, Spotify and iTunes!!!
I’m out in NYC this week so I had my dudes, Dean David and Alex Pischera, on the pod. We talk aggressive gay dudes, macrophilia, and how my dad cockblocked me as a youth. Please listen, subscribe, and give 5 stars So I can afford to live in NYC Follow these dudes: Dean @deandavid95 Alex @alexpischera
Another last-minute pod, but as always, its still silly and weird. Mike Massaro, the most recurring guest is back along with the lovely Lila Sparks. I honestly can’t remember what we talked about because we did this so late and I’m not gonna go back and listen to figure out what to write. Please listen, subscribe, and give 5 stars So I can pay someone to do all this. Follow these dudes: Lila @lilasparks_ Mike @mike.massaro
Yes Offense Ep. 78 is up on YouTube, Spotify and iTunes!!!
Did this extremely last minute at a bar thats clearly a front for sex trafficking out in Jersey. Besim Tonuzi and Taylor Andrews joined me to talk Godzilla, prolapsed stuff, and how disturbing Pinocchio was. Nicky B was here too, but she says like 2 things. Please listen, subscribe, and give 5 stars So I can eventually own a bar to sex traffic out of. Follow these dudes Besim @besimtonuzi Taylor @andrews_comedy
Emily Siero is back for the 2nd week in a row and the great Matt Lopes returns as well. We talk a lot about comedy and food. Also we did this out if my car. Please listen, subscribe, and give 5 stars So I can eventually do this in a studio one day Follow these 2 please Emily @emily.siero Matt @notmattlopes
We got 3 returning guests this week with Patrick McKinstry, Emily Siero, and Lila Sparks!!! We talk about death, baby’s soft skulls, and ghosting people to their face. Sort of.
Please listen, subscribe, and give 5 stars or you’ll get ghosted too.
Yes Offense Ep. 75 is up on YouTube, Spotify and iTunes!!!
My dudes Gambit and Sid Floyd return to the pod. We talk clown sex, puking at parties, and spend adapting books into fil for way too long. It’s educational.
Please listen, subscribe, and give 5 stars where you can so these intellectual talks can continue. Same as last week, but I don’t care.
Follow these dudes.
Gambit @gambitraps Sid Floyd @sid_floyd
We got a surprise solo guest ep this week featuring the very funny Brian Glass. We talk high school literature, horror movie cinema, and figure out Dahmer was cool besides all the murder stuff.
Please listen, subscribe, and give 5 stars where you can so these intellectual talks can continue.
Follow Brian Glass @brianglasscomic
Mike Massaro is back again, but enough about that lick. My dude, Parris Nichols a.k.a. Impression Prince made his debut on the pod this week! We talk Mortal Kombat, Jack Sparrows lifestyle, and honestly so much more movie stuff you’d think in Pete and Sell Do the Cinema again.
Please listen, subscribe, and give 5 stars where you can so we can be in movies one day then cut for doing this pod.
Yes Offense Ep. 72 is up on YouTube, Spotify and iTunes!!!
Jake Bentley and Dave Sheehan return to the pod after a long hiatus. We talk dinosaurs, old people terms, and pardoning worries from the 1600s, maybe it was the 1700s. I forgot.
Please listen, subscribe, and give 5 stars where you can so these witches didn’t die/get made fun of in vain.
Follow these dudes and support them as well:
Dave Sheehan @shroudofsilence
Jake Bentley (same on Facebook)
Emily Siero is back finally along with Shaquana “Big Momma” Cochran. If that’s enough estrogen for you, Mike Massaro is back for the 100th time. I think this is like the 10th episode where there’s no articles brought up so you know it’s another good one.
Please listen, subscribe, and give 5 stars where you can so I can make some money off this one day
Manny Sierra has finally made his way back to the pod along with Matt Lopes. We talk favorite Pokémon, do our best Mike Ehrmantraut impressions, and discuss how you can’t love someone who doesn’t like the movie Rush Hour.
Please listen, subscribe, and give 5 stars where you can or Matt will eat all your Oreos
Follow these dudes and support them:
Matt Lopes @notmattlopes
Mike Massaro @mike.massaro
My dudes, Sid Floyd and Mike Nice returned to the pod along with Ish Gupta. We talk movie theater disturbances, turning into animals, and we learn I didn’t know Lou Gehrig was white. There’s so much more and it’s hilarious.
Please listen, subscribe, and write reviews where you can or you’ll get Lou Gehrig’s disease.
Follow these dudes and support them as well:
Sid Floyd @sid_floyd
Mike Nice @mikenicect
Listen to their podcast, The ShedCast on all platforms you find pods @shedcast
Ish Gupta @doofyish
Yes Offense Ep. 68 is up on YouTube, Spotify, and iTunes!!!!
Returning guests, Avery Quinn and Brian Rodgers bless the pod this week. We recorded this on 9/11 so that comes up, apparently there’s different types of Amish people according to Avery, and we share gym class horror stories.
Please listen, share it around, and subscribe wherever you can. Please do or I’ll 9/11 myself.
Follow these dudes and support them as well:
Avery Quinn @averyquinn66
Brian Rogers @smooveheff
Mike Massaro returns for like the 10th time while Dan Shea makes his debut on the pod. Together we find out I’m extremely historically inaccurate, that Dan didn’t kill anyone while he was in the military, and how Mike got his McDonalds taken from him by teens.
Please subscribe, write a review, and tell other people about the pod or you’ll end up like Mike.
Follow me and the pod on Insta:
@sillyselli @yesoffensepodcast
Follow these dudes and support them as well:
Mike Massaro @mike.massaro
Dan Shea @dshea76
Brooke Louellen Smith is back along with another OG of the pod, Anthony Vega. We talk about performing at/going to strip clubs, how Brooke creepily pursues women, and why Jesus looks so sexy up there on the cross.
Please listen, subscribe, and write a review wherever you can so what I just wrote will be worth it, before I inevitably go to hell.
Some lovely ladies stopped by the pod this week. Shaquana Cochran returns along with Lila Sparks making her debut. We learn that Lila was a dim witted child, Shaquana will never be vegan, and I might be a psycho the way I eat my animal crackers.
Please listen, subscribe, and write a review wherever you can so if I accidentally have kids, I can get them a better education than Lila got.
This week, we had everyone’s favorite sad boy, Chris Warren, back on the pod along with newcomer and neck beard enthusiast, Cooper Gavin. And if it wasn’t jam packed enough for you, make a lot of room for Matt Lopes!!! We talk how datable we would be as women, how we’d tragically die, and being sober form milkshakes. This episode rules.
Please listen, subscribe, and write a review wherever you can. Don’t make me sad like Warren.
Was down in Philly this weekend and recorded this podcast after a hell of a night with my boys LeMaire Lee and Pete Eckenroth.
We talk getting tomatoes thrown at us, our weed misadventures, and apparently I’m missing out in the Muppets universe. This one went longer than usual, but that’s just cuz it’s
Go listen, write a review, and tell your friends or it’s tomatoes for your ass a well
The boys, Avery Quinn and Ryan Peterson return to the pod to shoot the shit. We talk a lot about being bad theater kids, when we first played GTA, and a Veracruz woman who had her gravestone turned into a giant penis.
Go listen, subscribe, and tell people about the pod. Where else are they reporting about penis chiseled gravestones???
Last minute pod and late upload. Sorry. Patrick Mckinstry and Nick James join the pod to rant about movies, Italians, and eventually we're joined by 2 Tall who explains the joys of becoming a new father.
Please subscribe on YouTube and write a review on iTunes. Thanks.
It's been a long time coming, but I finally got CT comedy legend Pat Oates to come on the pod. Dave Hintz is also on this episode. On some real shit though, this episode was mad fun. We talked about Forrest Gump sequels, where we were on good ole’ 9/11, and how a bunch of teens killed a guy with a traffic cone. Again, something for everyone.
Go subscribe, write a review, and tell your friends or you’ll get the traffic cone too.
Mike Massaro is back along with newcomer to the pod, Jorge Paz Saldon. Together, we go down a wild rabbit hole of gay Spiderman, consensual cannibalism, and how a serial killer who killed hundreds got out on good behavior.
Go like, share, and subscribe. That serial killer is still out there and kills people who dismisses subscribing.
The Shed Boys are back ladies and gentlemen! Sid Floyd and Mike Nice stopped by again to riff about our degenerate youths, our preferred fates, and a bunch of other nonsense. I'm too high and lazy to come up with a description right now. Enjoy.
Go subscribe and review it please! If not, I hope you have a mediocre life.
Did this one after an open mic with the mates, James T Moore and Avery Quinn. We also talked to an ex-Elbow Room waitress who stumbled onto the “set” this week, Along with stories of shitty venues, we talk about the infamous popcorn trick and incels. So a little bit of everything for everyone.
Please like, share, and subscribe or whatever. I’d do it for you if you did something.
Ozzy and Sam Carias from the Kush & Crime podcast join the pod this week. We talk about their favorite cases they’ve investigated so far, what inspired them to start a podcast, and how I can dominate on a volleyball court.
Please subscribe and leave a review and all that stuff or I’ll spike a ball in your face
The pod has returned and to get things back on track, I had 2 of my favorite recurring guests, Chris Warren and Mike Massaro come by. We talk about gay pride bullets, crooked cop shows, and crying in front of women.
Please like, share, subscribe, and leave a review where you can. If not, this all just comes off as sad.
It's been a minute since we had a lovely lady on the show so my best friend in the world, Taylor Burton, has been summoned to the pod. We talk about our origins of friendship, her experiences with creeps on Twitch, and our vastly different experiences working in grocery stores. One of my favorites I’ve done in awhile.
Go listen, share it around, and leave a review where you can. This pod is free, but drugs aren't.
My guy Brian Rogers returns to the pod and Ryan Peterson finally makes his debut. About half way through, Quan Gotti joins us as well. Unexpected, but a pleasant addition nonetheless. We talk about getting catfished in middle school, Bill Murray doing what exactly (?), and Amber Heard’s dog takes the witness stand.
Go listen, share it around, and leave a review where you can. I’ll do nothing for you in return.
This weeks episode is packed. Pete Angelo, Chris Warren, and Matt Lopes came by this week for one of the funniest episodes yet. Apparently Matt hates fat women unironically, Pete is not a fan of religion of any kind, and we finally found the perfect women for Chris Warren: Amber Heard.
Please listen, rate, subscribe and leave a review where you can. Just don’t leave a shitty one on a pillow like good olé’ Amber.
Yes Offense Episode 51 is up on YouTube, iTunes, and Spotify!!!
My favorite CT rap duo blessed the pod again this week. Musicians Sid Floyd and Mike nice stopped by to discuss how weird Anime intros can get, throwing up in your bed, and some fellas who were not so kind to our reptilian brethren.
Please like, share, and leave a review wherever you can. If not, Russia wins.
You’d think being outnumbered by comedians with “Christian values” wouldn’t be funny, but Avery Quinn and Mike Massaro return to the pod to dispel that myth. We give our thoughts on the Olympic Village, why we’d rather be musicians sometimes, and how James Marsden is a national treasure.
Please listen, share, subscribe, and write a review wherever you can. If you don’t, I’ll assume you’ve died violently.
Switching it up this week with not only a solo guest, but a non-comedian as well. Rapper/musician, Gambit, stopped by the pod to talk about possible “orgies”, bombing musically/comedically, and reminisce about the great Red Baron. Check out Gambit at his YouTube Channel: GambitRaps. Dudes a beast.
Please listen, share, and write a review anywhere you can. If you don’t, I’ll just assume you’re a bad person and that you’re going to hell when you die.
I want to point out that I always tell guests I’ll cut out anything they don’t want being put out there so just keep that in mind while listening to this episode. My man, Robbie “The Fire” Bernstein returns along with another repeat favorite, Chris Warren. Ray Robinson joined us well, but he was nervous I think. The title says it all.
Please listen, tell your friends, and subscribe/write a review on all platforms that you can. I need to afford a better therapist after this one.
Degeneracy is in the air this week as my dudes, Jake Bentley and Patrick Mckinstry grace the pod. We talk about our times working in restaurants, Jake’s time in a Christian cult (the best kind), and our overall disdain for the Game of Thrones writers.
Please listen, share, and leave a review on one of the platforms. Your mom already did.
Yes Offense Episode 46 is up on YouTube, iTunes, and Spotify!!!
Switching it up this week by having a (slightly) more civil guest on. My guy, Brian Rogers,finally joins the Yes Offense Island of Misfit Toys. We talk about knowing each other for the better part of a decade, his roles in various tv shows and movies, and over-analyze Snowfall and the Euphoria cast drama.
On some real shit too, when I started this pod a year ago, I was nervous about how people would receive it, but if my boys from before comedy are hitting me up to come on just to support and promote what they got going on, I’m doing something right. You can hear it in this episode.
Please listen, share, and write a review anywhere you can. You do it for people you’ve never met and never will.
This week we had a bit of an intervention. Matt Heath came on again to bumble his way through explaining… everything. Someone hug this man. Can’t knock Matt too much though when you got Mo Green talking over everyone about his equally sad life. Cliff gets a word in here and there, but this is what happens when you pod at 1 am after a crazy show. All rudeness aside, this episode is hilarious.
Please listen, rate, review, and share the shit out of this. We’ve recently stopped doing the podcast in Russia if that helps.
If you've never listened, start with this one. We got 2 returning, soft spoken guests, BJ Kwaygen and Ish Gupta, and the Dame FK makes his debut and leaves his mark on the pod. We talk about how to trip correctly, our experiences ducking the Catholic Church, and how God "favors" certain dudes.
Please listen, leave a review, and tell your friends about the pod. Or don't, if you have regular people as friends.
Mo Mussa returns to the pod. That should be all you need to know, but here's a sneak peak. We talk about Kanye, some lady doing horrible things to cupcakes, and Mo's cousin from Saudia Arabia who "rules".
Please go listen, like, and give a review or whatever. It'll do more than voting for anything ever would.
We're back baby! This week I got some of my favorite and most frequent guests to bless the pod. Cliff Mula stopped by to defend hoeing, Shaquana Cochran schools us on how to get a "real" woman, and Mike Massaro mumbles and simps out for Shaquana heavy. Its a sex/relationship pod this week.
Please listen, share, and leave a review somewhere. PLEASE!!! You guys support Nike and they have child labor camps. Do the bare minimum for me.
Everyone's favorite white knight is back, Chris Warren, along with newcomer to the show, Matt Lopes. We talk about being fat, how Chris needs to find himself a nice girl, and Matt lists off some of his favorite movies. They all suck. Also, way more children's movies than an adult man should be watching.
Please check it out!!! Give it a listen and a share around if you don’t mind. You do it for people you know are sexual predators and murderers.
This week I did a solo guest episode with my dude, Robbie “The Fire” Bernstein. We talk about how the we need to roll back the state and- sike! Robbie does however roast my living situation, my beard, and my views on loving oneself. I now hate myself.
Go listen and share it around like your mom shares her “love” around
This week we had everyone's favorite CT comic, Nick James, stop by along with new comer to the pod, Avery Quinn. Obviously there is Nick bashing here, but we also talk about our high school loser selves, Farrah Abraham’s new business venture, and how I got bullied in Sunday school. My life is tragic.
Go like, share, and subscribe so I can fart in a jar and someone will buy it for any amount of dollars.
Anthony Vega stopped by to make his official debut and Shaquana Cochran is back so you know this is a good one. We talk about Betty White, our experiences working at grocery stores, and everyone's favorite segment of the show returns: Going Thru Shaquana’s Facebook Statuses.
Go like, share, and subscribe. Seriously, some of you support individuals who have killed multiple people.
This episode is all over the place in every best way, but what can you expect from Pete Angelo, Chris Cyr, and Manny Sierra when they gotta deal with a lunatic like me for a host. We talk about our beliefs in God, Marvel movies, and some guy who ate his Grindr dates genitals.
Go like, share, and subscribe so I can be on Raya one day
Pete Angelo is finally back on the pod and Dave Sheehan finally makes his debut. We talk about my possible “delusions” about my life, 50 Cent trolling Madonna, and how nothing from high school ever ended up mattering.
Go like, share, and subscribe so I can fulfill my delusions
On the road again!!! This week I did the pod with Chris Warren and Mike Massaro in the back of a Polish social club. We talked (in the highest spirits) about the Polish people, our military heroes, and of course we talk about the hilarious defense of Jussie Smollett.
Go like, share, and subscribe so I can do this in an American club one day
We’re back baby! This week we got 2 hilarious returning guests. James T Moore and Gage Moreau sat down in a seafood restaurant to do this with me. We talk about the eel that's clearly dying in the tank behind us, talk about [not]seeing Dune, and a lot of technical porn talk. Listen to this in front of your kids.
Go like, share, and subscribe so I can do this at a fancy Red Lobster one day
This week I hung out with 2 hilariously, talented musicians, Sid Floyd and Mike Nice. We talk about crazy shows that always seem to happen at Toads Place, Sid opening up for real hip hop legends, and I open up about my long running feud with Method Man. This episode is so dope! If you’re a real hip hop fan, check this episode out!
Like, share, and subscribe so I can meet and confront Method Man
Got my favorite regulars this week! Cliff Mula and Mike Massaro were nice enough to sub in last minute this week… and then there’s Moe Green. We did have a lot of fun on this episode though talking about Travie McCoy, Moe’s knowledge of lesbians, and other shit I can’t remember cuz we did this mad late.
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I did this pod at a Halloween party. Its got pretty much every guest I've ever had. Its insane! I don't remember what we talked about or if I missed naming anyone who was on. Hope there's some coherence to this madness. I will also never EVER do this again. Enjoy!
Randy Young returns to the pod along with 1st time guest, Shaquana. We learn that Shaquana can’t talk into a mic without a stand, talk about what movie character types we relate to the most, and analyze the crazy media storm surrounding the Alec Baldwin shooting.
Like, share, and subscribe so I can hopefully be murdered by a celebrity one day
The infamous Moe and Mustafe Mussa stopped by this week to chop it up!! We talk about their crazy Somalian relatives, some lady who got beat up by teens then the cop who pulled up on her, and getting into parties we weren’t invited to in high school .You know these 2 so you know this episode is insane!!!
Like, share, and subscribe so I can… you know what? I got nothing clever this week
Cliff Mula and Mike Massaro return to the pod. We listen to Cliff tell us about more crime he’s witnessed, talk about the “controversy” surround the latest Bond film, and we pay tribute to Christopher Columbus because, “In this house Christopher Columbus is a hero. End of story!” Go like, share, and subscribe so everyday can be Columbus Day for me
2 new guests again this week! Went out to MA to do a pod with my mans, Jason Marby and Joey Buddha. We did this in a car outside of a mic so we obviously chastise vagrants that walk by, I can Jason like 5 different names than Jason due to smoking too much, and we talk probably way too much about sex on this one, but it was still a fun one. Please Go like, share, and subscribe so people will travel to me from now on
Back again this week with 2 new guests for you guys!! We got everyone's favorite CT comedian, Nick James, to make his debut along with the lovely Joy Nystrom to keep Nick’s cringe to a minimum. We talk about kids who wear Confederate flags that live up here, I tell a story of pooping my pants in 8th grade, and we come to the conclusion that we’re all slightly autistic. Go like, share, and subscribe so I can justify keeping this podcast going
Sorry for the delay again, but we’re back this week with 2 of my favorite recurring guests, Mike Massaro and Austin Apostol. We dive into my extensive research on girls named Kelsey, find out Biden’s family owned slaves or something, and talk about how we’d off ourselves. All in the spirit of comedy… obviously. Go like, share, and subscribe so I don’t have to do this on a porch next time
This week I had 2 new guests, Matt Heath and Rex Caesar. We take a “Which Soprano Are You?” quiz, I continue my feud with Awkwafina, and we reminisce over one of the greatest comedians, Norm Macdonald (RIP). Please check it out!! We did this in Rex’s liberal mother’s dining room so please make sure this gets back to her someway. Go like, share, and subscribe so I can afford to get a house where i can do this in my own kitchen
This week I had my favorite recurring guest, Cliff Mula, along with another return guest, Manny Sierra. We did this shit last minute in my car but it still came out awesome. Cliff and I tell Manny how we met, we argue over X-Men and The Big Lebowski, and we also talk about the late, great Michael Kenneth Williams (RIP). Also I think Manny says like 5 things this whole podcast. Again, super last minute pod! Go listen, like, share, and subscribe so I can stop doing this in my car
This week, Brooke Louellen Smith made her debut on the pod and Chris Warren returned! If you’ve ever wondered why Chirs is the way he is, we discuss his relationship with his father, how to REALLY deal with the cops, and if you couldn’t tell from the title, cocaine! One of the funniest episodes yet. Go like, share, and subscribe so I can actually afford coke @chriswarren_37
@brooklouellen
Only one guest this week, but its a fire guest.... Robbie "The Fire" Bernstein. God, I hate myself. I try to give Robbie dating advice, Robbie tries to convince me weed isn't helping my life, and we inevitably end up ranting about how the government can't be trusted... also there's a lamp. It’ll all make sense if you listen!!! Go like, share, and subscribe so I can justify my weed consumption.
Also check out Robbie's podcast, Run Your Mouth, and also catch him co-hosting the podcast, Part of the Problem with Dave Smith.
@robbiethefire
Went back up to Portland, ME this week with Mo Green to compete in “New England’s Funniest Comedian” Competition. We lost, but we still got to meet up with comedian Mike Gray and have a hell of a pod! We talk about Meatloaf, being Jehovah witnesses, and more God stuff I don’t believe in. Mo sings too… Go like, share, and subscribe so I never have to travel with Mo Green again
This week Randy Young and Chris Warren stopped by to shoot the shit. We talked about racist zombies, how much and why Chris hates comic book movies, and of course, as always, will never change, we talk about The Sopranos. Go listen, like, share, and subscribe to this so I can afford health insurance
This week I made the classic podcast mistake of not hitting record for the 1st 20 minutes of what was supposed to be the pod. Joining me on this major malfunction is Mustafe Mussa, Johnny Benson, and Jake Bentley. We talk about the Woodstock 99 doc on HBO, Johnny Benson can’t tell which baby is DaBaby, and we defend Lizzo.. I think? Go like, share, and subscribe so I can afford an in-house producer
@silllyselli @itsjonnybensonsfault @yurnewhero
Yes Offense Episode 16 is up on YouTube, iTunes, and Spotify!!!
This week I traveled to Portland, Maine to compete at New England’s Funniest Comedian 2021 Comedy Competition. Turns out Cliff Mula and Mike Massaro were also on the show so we met up after the competition to do this pod. We talk about our experiences in doing comedy in Maine for the 1st time to which it naturally devolves into STD stories and comparing our favorite snuff films. It's a doozy to say the least. Go like, share, and subscribe so I can fly to Maine next time
@sillyselli
@cluffmula
@mike.massaro
Mustafe Mussa and Manny Sierra joined me this week in the studio (my living room). We talked about some dumb broads, Kevin Spacey’s body count, and Space Jam 2. Mostly Space Jam 2. Honestly, either of the previous subjects lead or branch off into Space Jam 2. That movie was insane. Expect insane riffs. Go like, share, and subscribe so I can afford my own HBO
@sillyselly @stafestacks @midday_manny
James T Moore returns and Emily Santarsiero makes her debut. We talk about horoscopes, our favorite actors, and a friendly Peacock that was gunned down in the street. There’s more and it's way sexier and gross, but you’ll have to listen to find out why. Go like, share, and subscribe so I can poison more minds
Sorry for missing you last week, but we’re back with another hilarious episode! Ben Kirsch stopped by along with returning guest, Mike Massaro. While we start on track when talking about Bill Cosby or the stoner Olympic chick, we somehow end up talking about Agent Cody Banks. So nothing too out of the ordinary I guess. Go like, share, and subscribe so I don’t have to sell drugs anymore
This week I only had one guest. Mo Mussa was kind enough to stop by and disrespect my apartment. Along with that, we also talk about the latest Batman controversy, that Ukrainian couple that was handcuffed to themselves for 123 days, and Chrissy Teigan’s online bullying. This was a fun one! Go like, share, and subscribe so I can get a better apartment
We got 2 returning/repeat guests this week, Cliff Mula and Mo Green. We talk about basic stuff like Martin Luther King having hoes, Aladdin having hoes, and then of course it devolves into a discussion about porn and if certain preferences make you gay or not. They do and it turns out we’re all gay. At least in my opinion. Anyways, go like, share, and subscribe so I can afford to live in CT
Jonathan Tillson was nice enough to come hang and Pete Angelo returns to the show. We talk about bots on dating apps, something about bootstraps, and then it just takes a hilariously dark turn. This is a wild one! Go like, share, and subscribe so I can shop at Whole Foods
This week, comedians Andre Kim and BJ Quaygon hung out after a show and did a pod in my car. We cover subjects such as John Mulaney leaving his wife, BJ’s love for Family Matters, and these dudes try to overthrow my leadership the whole show, but it turned out to be one of my favorite episodes yet. Go like, share, and subscribe so I can stop doing this out of my car
Follow Andre, BJ, and myself on Instagram at:
@andrethecomedian @beekwaygen @sillyselli
Comedians Austin Apostol and Gage Moreau stopped by the show this week. We talked about many things including thirst traps, “wiping” techniques, and the morality of zoos. There’s more, but you’ll have to listen. Go like, share, and subscribe so I can move up a social class
My roommates and fellow comedians Ish Gupta and Mustafe Mussa came on the show this week. We talk about the Tony Hinchcliffe incident, R Kelly being R Kelly, and J Cole’s “mediocrity”. It's a doozy. Go listen, like, share, and subscribe so I don’t need roommates anymore
This week, comedians Cody Marino and Mo Mussa stopped by. We discuss how names can define a personality, the hypocrisy of gaslighting, and I convince these dudes to give Invincible a shot. A little bit of everything in this episode… Go listen, like, share, and subscribe so I pay someone to make sure this comes out on time
Hung out with Colin Cook and Chris Cyr this week! We talked about our favorite Marvel movies, our favorite serial killers, and Chris only mentions hating white people like 5 times... maybe more. Go listen, like, share, and subscribe so I can buy better drugs
Chilled with Pete Angelo and Mo Green this week! We talk about naming the pod, Yes Offense, controversies that happened months ago, and Mortal Kombat. Mostly Mortal Kombat.. The whole last half hour… Check it out!!! Like, share, and subscribe so I can quit my day job
Your boy sat down with comedians, Cliff Mula and James T Moore this week! This one is really all over the place in a great way. We talk about the Idris Elba controversy, Cliff tells us about crimes he’s witnessed (definitely wasn’t a part of), and it turns out I’m kind of gay. Aren’t we all though? Like, Share, and Subscribe or I’ll kill myself
This week, I was joined by fellow comedians, Katie Arroyo and Rodney Norman to talk about COVID, our experiences in the restaurant industry, and how’d we all think we’d survive in the zombie apocalypse. Like, Share, and Subscribe! Love you
Todays episode features comedians Tom Roche and Austin Apostol. We recorded this in Austin's car and it still came out great. In this episode, we talk switching bodies, drunk stories, and why high school coaches keep being racist. There's a little something for everyone on this one. Also, I realized I need to stop saying "wild". Enjoy!
Selli and fellow comedians Cliff Mula, Ish Gupta, and Mike Massaro give their alternate takes on children's movies, discuss why some Skillet member compared Cardi B to Hitler, and how we all hated going to church. Like, Share, and Subscribe or whatever. Enjoy!