Dr. Jen & Friends Lovecast: Recent Episodes
Dr. Jennifer Slingerland Ryan
Expert interviews, mini-action plans, and an intimate behind-the-scenes look at human behavior (ours!)… all tied to by my mission to help you feel healthy, happy, loved, and as if you belong.
Seasons are changing and we're getting to that time of the year where we can shed a few layers of clothing and embrace the warmer weather! (yesss!)
Not only does it just feel so good to feel the sun on your face, but your body loves it too! Your body is ready for you to get up and get movin'! All month long I have been discussing the importance of being connected to nature and why moving your body is so beneficial to both your mental health AND your physical health.
A little reminder of why nature is good for the soul:
- Reduction blood pressure, muscle tension, heart rate, AND the production of stress hormones
- Improves sleep
- Inspires creativity
- Enhances short term memory
- Increases HAPPINESS
So, you're ready to get going. What now?
Are you running low on out of the box ideas on what to do outside? Don't worry -- I've got you covered!
Resources & Things I Talk About 📝:
50 Naturivities! : you asked and I delivered - ON TOP OF what I talk about in this podcast, I have 50 more out of the box ideas for how to be active and enjoy your time in nature! I bet there are ideas in here you neverrrr would have thought of! Enjoy!
Were you on the move today?
Finding the time in your busy schedule to move your body is hard! --and I'm not talking about running errands, cleaning, or chasing kids (even if you do rack up 10,000 steps while doing those and more!)
Just like Elle Woods said - "Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy." She isn't wrong! (Legally Blonde)
Moving your body is a known stress reliever and a sure way to get your energy back. When your body is moving and being active, you become happier and have the energy to do more. You feel refreshed -- almost like after a really good workout. During the workout you may be thinking "ohhh why am I doing this to myself!?!?" but after the work out you feel SOOO good, accomplished, AND motivated.
Long story short, moving your body will help you be healthier and feel happier. Sounds like a win-win to me!
Are you running out of ideas on how to be active? Don't worry -- I've got you covered with a bunch of naturitivites that you can try! 🌳
Get out there, my friend!
Resources & Things I talk about 📝:
A surprise sneak peek at the first module for "Eight Ways to Happy" (reserve your spot now!) - This is a course, created by yours truly, that is aimed at helping you live a happier, more fulfilling life! It's time to live your best life and there is no time like right now to start!
50 Naturivities! - want to switch up your outside activities, but are running out of ideas? Here is an out of the box list for you. Get out there and soak up the sun!
Have you ever created a goal but then stumbled along the way and found it hard to keep going?
I've been there -- more than once! It's so hard to pick yourself up and dust yourself off when giving up altogether is so much easier. While an easier option, it is definitely not the best. If you gave up as soon as things became difficult, tricky, or you felt embarrassed, then your life wouldn't change for the better. You wouldn't be making moves towards a happier, more rewarding life!
Perseverance, my friend. It is such an important part of pursuing your life goals. Life will throw you curveballs, challenges, obstacles, and lemons. As the old saying goes, when life gives you lemons -- make lemonade! Pushing through those bumps in the road will not only make accomplishing your goals sooo much sweeter, but you'll feel a heck of a lot stronger and happier. I know this from my own experiences of falling down. Once I got myself back up, I pushed forward, and ultimately ended up happier, stronger, and successful!
Passion and perseverance are the recipes for success!
When things get tough -- just continue to tell yourself, "Just keep swimming!" (Yep, just like Dory!)
Resources & Things I Talked About 📝:
Angela Lee Duckworth: Leaving her job as a high-flying consultant, Angela Lee Duckworth became a math teacher and seen realized that it wasn't just IQ scores that "defined" a student. She has studied how grit and determination help pave the way for both academic and professional success.
Developing a Growth Mindset: Professor Carol Dweck is a leading expert in the field of motivation. Professor Dweck's research has shown how the mindset of a student has plays an active role in their achievements. It is common to praise high intelligence or talent, but are those praises good for motivation and learning? Dr. Dweck answers these questions and more!
How intentional are you when it comes to food? 🤔
Our bodies are SO good about telling us what it wants, but sometimes we aren't that great at listening. Alllllll month long we have been talking about really focusing on what our bodies are telling us and intuitive eating.
I'm going to let you in on a little secret: I actually don't like the term intuitive eating! My take is to be intentional, not intuitive because some people can’t trust their intuition. There, I said it!
While I am NOT an intuitive eating coach, I do want to help you be more intentional and mindful about what you put into your body. The type of food we eat impacts our overall health -- both mentally AND physically. Did you know food was so powerful? 💪
Let's start nourishing our bodies! Here are 10 steps to get started:
- Reject the diet mentality. Stop dieting.
- Recognize your hunger. Eat when your body tells you that you're hungry and stop eating when you are full.
- Make peace with food.
- Challenge the 'food police'.
- Feel your fullness.
- Discover the satisfaction factor.
- Cope with your feelings without using food.
- Respect your body.
- Movement - feel the difference
- Honor your health - gentle nutrition
Being more intentional will lead to a happier you. I'm here to help you live your best life!
Resources & Things I Talked About 📝:
- 10 Principles of Intuitive Eating
- Dr. Hyman
- 10 Day Sugar Detox (I'm doing this RIGHT NOW!)
This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app
Gut what!?
Have you ever felt just sluggish, without energy, or even have a stomach ache and you're not sure why? There is a reeeeally good chance your gut is trying to tell you something!
Your “gut” is everything in your digestive system, from your esophagus to your colon and intestines. The gut has been called by some researchers a “second brain.” Your gut informs your body how it needs to feel.
Not only does your gut send you signals when it doesn't like the food you're consuming, but there is also a connection between your gut and your mood and health overall (yes, I'm totally serious!).
An unhappy gut is linked to:
- Depression
- Anxiety
- Stress
- Chronic pain
- Brain dysfunction
- Immune system dysregulation
- ...and even hormonal imbalances
It may be time to pay attention to what your gut is telling you! If you're feeling less than great, the food you are consuming may be a factor in that.
We're only half way through March, which means we have looooads more to talk about when it comes to gut health and providing your body with the right type of fuel to keep it going.
Enriching your body with nourishing foods -- it's about time your gut gets a little TLC!
Resources & Things I talk about:
- Maggie Roney, LPC and Functional Medicine Practitioner
There are 8 Self Love Tools, and today we’re talking about the 8th one - Enrich Your Body with Food. Today I’m answering “How do I eat healthy when I’m pressed for time?” I’m going to share 4 ways to eat healthy plus 2 ideas for quick, healthy meals.
Today I’m giving three ways to be mindful of your eating. I can’t wait to share allllll the great science behind food, nutrition, mental health, and happiness.
Show Resources:
- Crockpot Recipes
- Buddha Bowl Recipes
Food is powerful and the more we understand how food affects our body, the more we can use it to live happier AND healthier!
According to the World Health Organization, a poor diet is a major factor contributing to depression, which is the top driver of disability in American?
Enriching your body with nourishing foods is a HUGE step in creating that healthier, happier, more fulfilling life we’re all craving. This month I am covering how food truly affects your mood, intuitive eating, gut health, AND so much more (oh yes, there is SO much to cover here!).
Plus, I give you a little background on my own mental health story in this episode. Have a listen!
Want to get a head start on enriching your body?! Check out these resources! (I LOVE these!)
Resources & Things I talk about 📝:
- Dr. Hyman's book "Blood Sugar Solution"
- Dr. Hyman's YouTube Channel
- "Eat the Rainbow"
- Dr. Amy Myer's
- Colorful Spices for Health
Want to know what it's like to join a bike club and where you're the only one who has a beach cruiser complete with a basket and a bell? (I don't know, I never got that far. Find out why...)
Close inner core friendships are the shiznit of life. When you have a few good compadres, the world just seems to click. But how do we meet these people?
On today's podcast, I'm answering the question: Where and How can I meet good A-friends?!
Children easily make friends on the playground or at school. At school dances groups of friends take over the dance floor -- but what about adults? With our busy schedules, jobs, and kids and that to-do list that never ends, where do we find inner-core friends we can feel close with?
I've got answers! 🎉
Friendships can be made at aaaaany age. It’s all about figuring out where to meet new people who share your interests.
Remember, it isn’t about who you’ve known the longest. It’s about who walked into your life, said “I’m here” and proved it.
Plus, at the end of this episode, I'm giving tips on how to be vulnerable. Big hint here: You won't have close friends without a little risk and self-disclosure.
Thanks for listening!
Resources & Things I talk about 📝:
- CASA ➡️ https://nationalcasagal.org/
- Crossfit ➡️ https://www.crossfit.com/
- Zumba ➡️ https://www.zumba.com/en-US
- Inwood Winery ➡️ http://inwoodwines.com/
- Texas Hill Country ➡️ https://texashillcountry.com/
- Friendfinder Apps ➡️ RealU, Nextdoor, Hey! Vina, Friender
....and so much more!
Your inner core consists of the people who you chose to be in your life who know the real you, who you confide in, and who you share a connection with.
More than 60% of lonely people are married. Surprising, isn’t it?! When married couples no longer share their deepest feelings, thoughts, and desires one or both people feel disconnected and lonely, even in the same room with the person they are married to. Feeling this way causes the flame to fizzle out and the relationship itself starts to feel meaningless. When relationships get to this point, you may feel like your spouse can not offer you the deep connection you need.
When you think about your inner core, do you include your spouse in that group of people?
Here is why you should:
- When a spouse feels safe and secure with his or her significant other, utilizing the attunement and interdependence of a secure, safe person, the partner feels heard, seen, and felt. There is trust and a feeling of belongingness.
- Partners attune to each other (attunement = a quality of integrative relationships in which emotional connections are cultivated through the focused attention between two individuals in interpersonal interactions)
(HINT: This is how your inner core should make you feel! We talked all about “The Hub” last week!)
ALLLL of this and more is why it is SO important to include your spouse in your inner core. They are your person! What do your spouse and your inner core have in common? They both allow you to feel vulnerable, safe, loved, and understood. These feelings are priceless.
Should your spouse be part of YOUR inner core? Yes! Now, let’s talk about why!
Have you ever been with a group of friends you enjoy being with, but you still felt lonely and disconnected?
I've been there too! You're at a social gathering and you just feel withdrawn -- almost like you're faking happy.
Over 40% of us will feel aches of loneliness and isolation at one point in our lives or another. Unfortunately, despite how common these feelings are, not many people are really 100% aware of how they impact our lives AND the lives around us.
Not only does loneliness, isolation, and feeling disconnected bring us down, but it can alter your mood and affect the way you treat the people you love the most.
There are 3 Types of Friends in YOUR life. Let’s break it down and talk about who you go to when:
- You're feeling happy
- You're feeling sad
- You have something to celebrate
- You need support
- You're feeling stuck
You’re not alone, my friend!
Did you know that major depression is one of the most common mental health disorders, and an estimated 17.3 people are diagnosed each year with a major depressive episode?
What you may not know is that depression is also often confused with loneliness. Loneliness is often confused with depression.
I know that feeling, and probably you do, too. We’ve all felt lonely in our lives, but chronic loneliness can lead to some serious mental health issues.
Loneliness can feel isolating. I’m on a mission to help people feel happier through their social connections and feel less lonely.
Loneliness comes to a halt when we build social connections.
There are three main reasons people need people. Besides the increase of mental health and wellness, loading up on love from your inner core helps you:
- Feel like you belong,
- Feel supported, and
- Feel a sense of purpose.
Once you’ve listened, hop on over to join the conversation in the Facebook Community.
This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app
Have you told yourself how great you are today (AND meant it!) ? There is no better time than right this second to remind yourself how amazing of a human you are!
We're talking ALL about affirmations this week and how they give us the mental boost we need to push through barriers and believe in ourselves!
The term affirmation occasionally confuses people, so to start, let me tell you exactly what an affirmation is. An affirmation is a declaration or a confirmation about a current truth. For an affirmation to work, it needs to be 100% true about you, your current moment, your environment, or your state of being.
With that being said, let's talk about why affirmations are SO important in the life changing, goal creating process! The research is there: using affirmations to try and change what you think by proclaiming a non-truth can actually decrease self-esteem AND make matters worse. It is SO, SO important to only speak the truth when you are writing your affirmations.
The two types of affirmations we are going to discuss are: Other-Affirmation (these come from other people, to you, and they speak a global truth which is meant to boost self-confidence & self esteem.) and Self-Affirmation (these comes from YOU -- that little voice inside your head and the self dialogue you have daily.)
I can not stress the importance of affirmations being a part of your daily routine. In order to get where you want to go, you need to believe that you can get there!
I know YOU can!
We are over half way through the first month of the new year! Can you believe it?!
Time is flying and not waiting around for us to decide what our next step is going to be. Have you mapped out what your goals for this year are going to be? It is so easy to get stuck in the day to day grind, but if you ever want that grind to change, you're going to have to plan, visualize, and get after those goals!
Visualization is SUCH an important part of not only creating goals, but also accomplishing them. You need to be able to see where you are, where you want to be, and how you're going to get there. One of my favorite ways to start visualizing is creating a Vision Journal.
Vision journaling is a way to manifest, build, produce, and craft future events, goals, and outcomes -- crafting the world you want by putting it down on paper. DO NOT get a vision journal confused with a process journal. While a process journal is a great tool, it is totally different than a vision journal.
Ask yourself the important questions.
For example:
- Where am I right now?
- Where do I want to be?
- What road do I need to take to get there?
- What changes do I need to make to accomplish this goal?
- How will those changes impact my life?
You get the idea!
Every human has one thing in common: the pursuit of happiness. We all have needs, wants, passions, and desires. It's time to get those down on paper. Make your goals real. Read them every day. Tweak them and make them current. Life changes, so do your goals! What better time than the present to commit and start working on your future?
YOU can do this. I believe in you!
In this episode, I'm answering, “How do I create a vision for my WHOLE life?” The answer? Reverse-engineer your life from the end to right now. Only then can you start planning your day because you'll be planning with purpose.
Learn the details of the Happiness Setpoint along with the Pursuit of Happiness. Plus, there are two types of visualization: outcome and processing. You'll hear Tammy and I laugh as we share stories of me doing Advanced Zumba and her spending a day with the Dallas Mavericks, too.
This week I’m talking ALL about BIG, hairy, audacious goals (BHAG for short) and how to get the ball rolling!
Questions to ask when you're setting a BHAG:
- Is there a clear endpoint?
- Does it light you up when you talk about the endpoint?
- Does this goal get your creative juices flowing?
- Do you find it exciting and stimulating?
- Are you willing to throw all of your energy into this goal?
- Is it a little bit scary?
- How will you know when you’ve hit it?
REFERENCES:
Jim Collins spoke about a BHAG in this podcast.
“Built to Last” by Jim Collins
The movie “Soul” on Disney+ was referenced in this podcast.
This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app
This week I am going to talk about Planning for 2021 and how an Appointment With Yourself Is Still An Appointment. In fact, how you schedule and prioritize your own life has a lot to do with how much you value yourself.
Here are steps to get you started:
- Use a visual calendar
- Add in sleep (a big chunk of time)
- Add in time you give to others
- Eyeball your calendar to see what you’re giving away to others when you could be giving to yourself
- Schedule in your biggest self-love priorities in open spaces
Don’t forget to Sign up for Vision 2021, a LIVE mini-course where I’m answering What, How, and Who So you can Refocus, Recharge, and Renew in the New year at www.jenniferslingerlandryan.com/2021 -- you do not want to miss this mini-training for even MORE information!
Are you feeling disconnected and alone this holiday season? That totally makes sense! 2020 has been the year of unpredictability, masks, and social distancing. Rather than dwelling on who we can’t be with this holiday season, let’s talk about all the ways we can still be connected to those we love.
To start, I’d like to talk about what a gathering is because it is actually different than being gathered. A gathering is when a group of people just get together in the same space. FEELING gathered is feeling at peace in your current physical and emotional space. The holidays are a time where, normally, we both gather and feel gathered. This is a time when we are with the ones we hold dear to our hearts who also make us feel warm and cozy when they give us the best hugs. If there is one thing we can ALL agree on -- 2020 has been far from what any of us consider normal.
How are we supposed to feel that joy of the holidays if we’re missing out on those annual family bear hugs? You’re in luck -- that is the question we are answering today!
I don’t want you to think that this is supposed to be easy. It totally is NOT. 2020 has been the year of curve balls and constantly testing us on a mental and emotional level. We’ve lost so much of the control in our daily lives that we’re used to having. Not being able to celebrate the holidays like we want to is just the icing on the pandemic cake.
Let’s talk about how to still feel the joy of the holidays while keeping ourselves AND our loved ones safe:
Being together -- still a thing!
- Small groups w/ people you know and feel comfortable with
- Wear masks
- Stay 6 ft apart
- SAY: In the small groups, you share stories, talk about common challenges, and laugh together. Those intimate, vulnerable moments are crucial right now. The energy of a person, even when they are six feet away and masked, is palpable.
Being together virtually -- it can still feel good!
- I often remind myself: this is still a real person that you can watch, see, and be present with
- Although not a place where you can physically touch, the virtual world is still an excellent place to see the person you love and feel seen. Sit on your patio or your favorite place on the sofa, grab a drink, and enjoy one another’s company. Take in their surroundings, hear the sound of their voice, feel what it’s like to be there with them because you are with them.
Love the one you’re with -- value of immediate family through the holidays: your intimate partner and children
- I don’t have extended family that gets together
- Always felt a tinge of longing and FOMO - sadness
- Go ALL OUT with immediate family - don’t shortchange yourself
- Cook together, eat, laugh, tell stories, watch football, complete a puzzle, take a nap, or snuggle.
Feeling gathered this holiday season is possible. I challenge you to not roll over and give into the idea that because we have to maintain a safe distance, we can’t feel the joy and love we deserve. YOU deserve to feel happy and healthy while still being connected!
Happy Holidays!
When you’re busy, with a mile-long to-do list, and you’re giving to everyone but yourself -- your job, your kids, your home -- it’s hard to make time for yourself. So, how do you find more time in the day to schedule what really matters to you? That’s what I’m answering on today’s Lovecast episode.
Chunking - Breaking off blocks of time into 15-minute increments and finding opportunities to prioritize yourself and prioritize what is most important to you. This is simply being intentional with your time.
- Use a weekly calendar that actually has a time attached to it in 15-minute increments. I want you to start thinking of your life in 15-minutes chunks of time. Everything you do is going to take a minimum of 15-minutes. If you have an activity that actually takes only three or four minutes, bonus, you've just won yourself a little bit of break time. However think of your life as set into 15 minute chunks time.
- Depending on what you have going on during the day, you will have 15-, 20-, 30-minute increments that you don't have anything scheduled. These are your golden opportunities to be very intentional with your time and add in your absolute biggest priorities.
Stacking - Adding in multiple activities into that one block of time - one chunk. This technique is used specifically with the Self Love Tools which are the foundation for mental wellness. Examples include:
- Within a 15-minute chunk of time, spend 5 minutes writing your goals, affirmation, and expressions of gratitude in my Vision Journal. In the additional 10-minutes of time, meditate on your vision and affirmations. You''ve been intentional within the 15-minute chunk of time.
- Within a 30-minute chunk of time, take a walk in nature while popping in your earbuds and listen to motivational media (self=help book, TED Talk, or your favorite podcast). Or, spend 15-minutes with motivational media and 15 minutes talking to a friend. In a 30-minute chunk of time, you will have completed three Self Love Tools.
Other Considerations:
- When you're chunking and stacking you're only doing what is most important to you. Your self-care and the self-love tools is also very important because these are the eight foundational principles of mental health. There are many other self-care things that you can do like wrap yourself in a blanket and watch a Netflix movie. That's not part of the self-love foundation but it is self care. You would want to schedule that time in.
- Schedule in spontaneous time.
- Schedule in your "down" time.
For some, living with chaos feels completely normal, to the point that having calm is a foreign idea. However, when you get completely overwhelmed, anxious, and stressed, you need to have a go-to strategy that will inject your life with instant calm.
Global Grief is a real and palpable feeling for everyone because of COVID-19. On today's episode of Lovecast, I answer the question: What if this is the new normal, and we need to embrace what we have? What if we don’t do that? What are we risking when we don’t firmly place ourselves at this moment and begin to plan for our future.
Instead of waiting for the past to come back so you can “get things back to normal,” feel sad and frustrated about the ending we’ve all been in the process of facing for months now.