Shades of a Black Boy Rainbow: Recent Episodes
JoJo
Rainbows are symbols of hope. But not all rainbows are created equally. Navigating life being black, queer and unapologetic can be tough. JoJo speaks on a range of topics from friendships, racism, sex, mental health, and defying social and cultural norms from the perspective of a queer black boy....
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This year, I’m heading to World Pride not just to celebrate but to take up space. In this episode, I unpack what Pride really means to me in a world that still wants us quiet, small, and scared. From corporate performativity to the weight of shame we’re still unlearning, I’m talking about the power of showing up, being seen, and choosing joy anyway. Pride didn’t start as a party and I’m not treating it like one. Not this year.
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What happens when the version of you the world praises… isn't the full story? In this episode, I’m unpacking the lifelong performance so many of us get trapped in, especially if you're Black, queer, and navigating corporate systems, family expectations, social media, and survival. From being a queer athlete in the 90 - early 2000s, to managing in Corporate America as a young Black man without a degree, I reflect on how I learned to edit myself for safety, acceptance, and respect — and how I’m learning to stop.
We talk work trauma, imposter syndrome, image curation, chasing status, and the fear that being silly, soft, or fully you might cost you everything. Spoiler: it doesn’t.
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In this week’s episode, I’m sharing something deeply personal and vulnerable. “and celibate + sober” isn’t just a follow-up to last week’s talk on sexual chemistry—it’s an honest look at what happens when you strip away the sex, the alcohol, the validation, and the constant performance. I talk about what led me to take a break from sex for 90 days and alcohol for 30, how hookup culture left me feeling empty, and the moments that made me realize I was being consumed, not truly seen. From being catfished by a fine-ass dude who didn’t even need to lie, to disappearing men who ghosted the minute I wouldn’t send nude pics or give them sex, this episode is about reclaiming my self-worth without external validation. If you’ve ever questioned your worth when sex or validation is off the table, this one’s for you.
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In this episode, I’m joined by my friend Stephan as we get real about recognizing sexual chemistry, owning our sexual positivity, and learning how to trust our bodies — and our boundaries — at parties and beyond. We share the story of how we met at Folsom Weekend in San Francisco, navigating overstimulation, connection, and how sometimes the universe really does line things up perfectly. We talk about the difference between sexual attraction and emotional connection, learning how to take rejection, and why embracing your self-worth and being honest with yourself changes everything in these environments. Whether you're in the scene, curious, or just love hearing real conversations about sex and self-love, this one's for you.
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In this episode I’m telling a story I never thought I’d say out loud. The time in my twenties when I secretly was hooking up with my friends’ boyfriends.
There was no drama. No blowups. No one ever found out. But the real damage? It was what I did to myself.
Fresh out of the military and new to the LGBTQ+ community, I was starving for connection. I confused attention with affection, sex with love, and ended up chasing validation from people who were never really mine. This episode isn’t about glorifying those moments—it’s about owning them. It’s a confession, a reflection, and a cautionary tale about what happens when you don’t yet know your worth.
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What if “let’s be friends” isn’t kindness but a coping mechanism?
In this episode, I'm breaking down what it could mean to be offered friendship after rejection and why you don’t have to accept it. From emotional bread crumbing to self-abandonment disguised as "maturity", this episode challenges the myth that staying connected is always the “right” thing to do or an act of being the "bigger person".
Let's explore the difference between being friendly and being friends, the real reason people offer “we can still be friends,” and how we often stay in situationships out of fear, fantasy, or false hope. If you’ve ever felt stuck as someone’s “maybe,” or settled for friendship hoping they’d change their mind, this one is for you.
If this episode hits home, share it with a friend and remember: you get to protect your peace.
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In this solo episode, I get real about what it’s like to carry imposter syndrome, burnout, and the weight of always needing to be the “strong one.” From hyper-independence, to chasing success to prove my worth, and how that hustle has left me feeling emotionally numb and disconnected from myself.
This isn’t just about naming what’s broken, it’s about reclaiming what’s possible. I talk about stepping into my soft guy era, choosing environments where I can be my whole self, and redefining strength as vulnerability, rest, and truth.
If you’ve ever felt like you had to be everything for everyone or like your softness made you less than, this one’s for you. Your softness isn’t a weakness. It’s your liberation.
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This is a soft, no outline, no script, no talking points, no guest episode, Where i'm being honest about burnout, writer’s block, and the emotional weight of building something real. After 90 days of podcasting consistency, the fatigue is hitting hard. Not just physically, but mentally and spiritually. This episode isn’t a masterclass or a list of tips. It’s a check-in. A reminder that showing up imperfectly is still powerful.
I'll share about the behind-the-scenes emotional labor of making Black. Queer. Unapologetic., the self-imposed pressure to deliver, and what it means to keep creating through exhaustion without abandoning yourself. If you’ve ever felt like your passion was starting to drain you, or like you needed permission to slow down, this one is for you.
Because being tired doesn’t mean you’re failing — sometimes, it means you’re growing
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In this necessary conversation, I sit down with Joseph, a biracial Black and White gay man to talk about the deeply uncomfortable truth behind racial preferences in the queer community. From the casual “no Blacks, no Asians, no This, no That” on dating apps to the fetishization of Black men as sexual objects. Together, we unpack what’s really behind the phrase “it’s just a preference,” and how media and porn have shaped our biases. We also reflect on our own lived experiences being objectified, erased, or hyper-visible for the wrong reasons, and even how people of color internalize anti-Blackness and Eurocentric ideals.
This episode doesn’t offer easy solutions. It’s honest. It’s personal experiences. And it’s just the beginning. Because we didn’t even scratch the surface of colorism, internalized racism among POC, or the ways trauma can shape attraction. A Part 2 might be necessary but for now, this is the truth as we’ve lived it.
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Making friends as an adult is hard—but making Black best friends in new cities and unfamiliar spaces? That’s a whole different journey. In this episode, I’m joined by my real-life besties, Nizer and Jamal, as we get into how we found each other, what it means to build deep friendships as Black gay men, and why chosen family hits different.
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Gay bars have always been a staple of queer culture, but for BIPOC folks, the experience isn’t always welcoming. This week, I’m joined by Clif, a DJ and no stranger to the insides of LGBTQ nightlife, to unpack what it’s really like navigating queer nightlife as Black and Brown people. We getting real about the need for truly inclusive spaces for ALL OF US.
Are traditional gay bars still serving our community as a whole, or is it time to rethink what safe spaces look like for all of us? Let’s talk about it.
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Ever wondered what it’s like to go on a gay cruise? Well, I did too—reluctantly. In this episode, I break down my first experience on a gay cruise in 2023, why the marketing didn’t appeal to me as a Black gay man, and how going with a large group just didn’t work for me. But plot twist—I went again in 2024, and this time, I did it my way.
From the cost (because, baby, this is not a budget trip) to the different groups and meetups (Bears, veterans, BIPOC, Gaymers, and more), I’m sharing everything I wish I had known before stepping on board. If you’re BIPOC and considering a gay cruise, I’ve got insights on what to expect, how to find your people, and whether it’s worth the hype.
And let’s not forget—there’s more than one company out here hosting gay cruises, so if you’re thinking of booking, do your research and find out what works for you!
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Have you ever felt like your body wasn’t enough? Like no matter what you did, you were either too much or not enough for the spaces you existed in? In this episode of Black. Queer. Unapologetic., we’re getting real about body image struggles.
From the pressures to fit into the ideal gay body—lean, muscular, light-skinned, and hyper-masculine—to the extreme lengths people go to for validation, we’re unpacking the harm, the hustle, and the healing.
This is a conversation about learning to see ourselves beyond the way we’re seen. About reclaiming our bodies, rejecting toxic beauty standards, and finding spaces where we’re celebrated—not just tolerated.
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We’ve spent all February talking about relationships—being single, dating apps, open relationships, hookup culture, and everything in between. But today, we’re closing this series with the most important relationship of all: the one you have with yourself.
In this episode, we’re talking about what it really means to fall in love with yourself—not in a superficial or conceited way, but in a way that brings real confidence, peace, and joy. We’re talking about why self-love has to come from within (not external validation), how to recognize when you’re not loving yourself enough, and practical ways to build a healthier, stronger relationship with you.
Because when you truly love yourself, you stop settling, you stop chasing validation, and you start living life on your own terms.
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After listening to our last conversation on Relationship Dynamics, my friend Sean felt compelled to share his own story—and trust me, you don’t want to miss this one.
In this episode of Black. Queer. Unapologetic., we dive even deeper into the complexities of relationships, exploring what works, what breaks down, and how hookup culture plays into it all. Sean opens up about his personal experiences, lessons learned, and the challenges of navigating love, sex, and connection in a world that often prioritizes the temporary over the meaningful.
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Dating. Long-term relationships. Monogamy? Open? Situationships? In this episode of Black. Queer. Unapologetic., I sit down with my friend Brian—someone I haven’t spoken to in a while—to unpack the many layers of modern relationships. We’re diving deep into what it means to figure out the kind of relationship that truly works for you, exploring deal breakers, communication struggles, break ups and the reality of love in today’s world.
Whether you’re single, committed, or somewhere in between, this conversation is full of insight.
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Dating in 2025? A whole mess. In this episode of Black. Queer. Unapologetic., I’m joined by my friend Fernando as we dive into the ups and downs of being single, navigating the wild world of dating apps, and the unique struggles that come with finding modern romance as we get older. Tune in for laughs, insights, and a few dating truths we all need to hear.
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Rejection—whether in dating, work, sports, or life—is something we all face. It can often come with layers of racism, homophobia, and bias. In this episode of Black. Queer. Unapologetic., I'm taking a deep dive into the painful, complex, and sometimes surprising ways rejection shows up in our lives.
I'm unpacking how rejection chips away at our confidence and self-worth over time. But it’s not all heavy—this episode is also about finding the tools to rebuild, thrive, and redefine what rejection means for us.
Tune in to learn how to see yourself as more than someone else’s decision.
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Love is in the air—or maybe not. This February on Black. Queer. Unapologetic., we’re diving into all things dating and relationships. From the ups and downs of dating apps to embracing singlehood, exploring open relationships, and navigating love as BIPOC and Queer individuals, we’ve got you covered.
Join me every week for unfiltered conversations, juicy insights, and relatable stories about the complexities of modern love. Whether you’re swiping, thriving solo, or redefining what relationships mean to you, this month is all about celebrating love on our own terms.
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In this episode of Black. Queer. Unapologetic., I’m joined by my friend, Dr. Christopher Nizer, a trailblazing chiropractor and proud Black queer business owner. Together, we dive into his journey of building a thriving practice while navigating the unique challenges and triumphs of being both Black and queer in the business world.
Dr. Chris shares his story of resilience, authenticity, and success. We’ll explore what it means to break barriers, redefine representation, and thrive as a Black queer entrepreneur.
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Being fired is never just about losing a job—it’s about navigating the emotional, financial, and personal fallout. In this episode of Black. Queer. Unapologetic., I'm sharing a raw and honest reflection on the experience of being let go while living at the intersection of Black and Queer identities.
This episode is also about resilience, reclaiming your power, and redefining your narrative after a setback.
Tune in for an empowering conversation that reminds you: Being fired doesn’t define you—how you rise from it does.
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Shades of Black Boy Rainbow is now "Black. Queer. Unapologetic.". This isn’t just a new name—it’s a declaration of who we are and what this space represents: a platform for bold conversations, unapologetic truths, and stories that amplify the voices of Black and Queer communities (As well as other marginalized communities).
Tune in to hear Jojo share what’s in store for Black. Queer. Unapologetic., the kind of stories we’ll tell, and how this podcast will continue to inspire, challenge, and connect us all.
Join the movement. Be unapologetic."
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If you date a lot you're called a serial dater, if you choose not to date but still get yours in the bedroom you get called a ho or slut shamed. Dating is not easy for everyone and for me it has not been easy. I've chosen not to date even though it's in my nature. The Ho Phase has been activated and this is how it's going....
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Speaking your mind is no easy task. Especially when things really hurt you. Friends, family, work, dating, and just adulting plays so many roles in our lives. What happens when being vulnerable is weaponized against you to force your silence? Or even worse stop you from being yourself and expressing your feelings. Let's talk about it!
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Growing up in the SF Bay Area is not the same for everyone, especially when you're gay person of color. JoJo and Eddie have an open conversation about what it was like from a Black and Latino perspective. Strap in folks!
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Everyone wants to feel good about the themselves, but what happens when external factors knock us down? What happens when we tie our self worth to material things that can be taken away from us? This episode, JoJo shares his own journey with self worth and opinions on the idea of self worth as a whole.
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Mental health is often swept under the rug in queer and POC communities. JoJo has been on a mental health journey since 2017 and is opening up about his triggers and his journey in hopes of helping someone else recognize their own triggers and start their own journey towards mental wellness. Check it out!
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What is this podcast even about?! JoJo introduces himself shares a few stories and opens up about why he decided to start this podcast in the first place. Check it out!
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