Divorce & Conquer : Recent Episodes
Joe Staszak
Divorce and Conquer is all about preparing you for the SHOW! The SHOW is your life and all of us are playing the starring role in our own SHOW every day! Most of us want much more for ourselves and we want to reach the next level, We want it all! Deep down in places some don’t talk about we want to play out our roles on the biggest of stages and under the brightest of lights.
But to get what we want in life we have to first KNOW what we want in life. Once we identify the destination we can then work on the journey and that’s what Divorce and Conquer is all about.
Your host, Joe Stazak, has lived in the sports arena his whole life. Professionally he spent the last 32 years covering all sports, in both the television and radio arena, in one of the top 5 markets in the country, earning him 5 Emmy nominations for his work. But his personal life has unfortunately been interrupted by two untimely and unfortunate divorces situations. Instead of wallowing in his circumstances, Staszak has turned this unenviable and daunting process into an extraordinary opportunity to transform himself into a combination of physical, emotional and financial excellence derived from a survive and advance mind set with an acute hunger for a better life via a total transformation of body and mindfulness. And now he wants to provide you with the opportunity to do the same.
Staszak is a certified Master Life Coach, fitness and dietary instructor and divorce specialist. He currently works under the tutelage of highly successful mentors and life and spiritual coaches such as former NFL greats Randall Cunningham, and John Madsen. Each week Staszak will guide you with actionable tips to get you through the divorce process with minimum affect on your finances and your emotional well being, while showing you the way to avoid society’s pull towards mediocrity in your insatiable quest for personal and professional excellence with no intention of apologizing for it.
You want to be a champion? Then start playing like one.
Subscribe today and don’t miss a single episode!
Joe is in a reflective mood with his mentor Bob Anderson, looking up at the scoreboard of past marriages and arguments and asking, "Is there even a scoreboard?"
In today's episode of Divorce and Conquer, current therapist Bob and former sports star Joe break down our understanding of ego. How much does our ego drive us – and at what cost? Why do we need to validate ourselves in our relationships, and what does that winning mentality do to our partner?
This is a deep dive into what drives us – our ego or our self-esteem? When do we let our ego wander into the world of self-indulgence? There are life lessons aplenty in this insightful episode. Please join Joe and Bob and let's learn how to become better men, regardless of where we are in our marriage.
"I define ego as what I can do. And self-esteem as more of who I am." - Bob Anderson
In This Episode:
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Why the ego is supposed to steer and navigate, not drive you into walls
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What is your need to be right versus your need to be respected?
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When does your need to be right diminish your partner?
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Why do we need to validate ourselves in our relationships?
- How sexy is self-esteem?
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Should star players get star treatment?
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When professional sportsmen let their competitive side get to them
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Who doesn't want emotional satisfaction?
- Marry the girl, marry the family
- Learning to unlearn what is no longer true
And so much more!
Resources:
- (The Book of Poetry Bob recommends) The Ego Is Always at the Wheel - The Ego Is Always at the Wheel: Bagatelles: Delmore Schwartz, Robert Phillips: 9780811210287
Connect with Joe Staszak:
Website
Facebook - Divorce & Conquer
If you’ve been through three divorces and you know full well your complicity in contributing to the sclerotic atmosphere of a doomed relationship right on through the divorce proceedings, how do you turn your life around and learn to become a more compassionate human being, devoid of all of the satanic toxicity that landed you in that dark, dark environment in the first place? This is Chip Farley’s story, as he tells it in this heart-to-heart episode of Divorce and Conquer with our host, Joe Staszak.
Chip Farley is Joe’s spiritual guide and a man he credits as helping him turn his life around. He’s also Joe’s brother-in-law. Chip’s humility shines through as he earnestly shares what he got wrong in his first few marriages (and divorces) — and how he has managed to redeem himself in a relatively short period of time as part of an ever-evolving process.
Faith and spirituality play a big role in Chip’s journey too, as he shares the power of becoming consistent by being accountable - And according to Chip this starts with reading the Bible every day.
There’s a lot we can learn from Farley — and Staszak is experienced enough to be able to draw his unparalleled wisdom out of him, with both of them displaying great humility about their process stories of understanding the human condition as it relates to positive and productive interaction with other members of the same species.
“The only thing we can control is our reaction to what happens.” ~ Chip Farley
In This Episode:
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How to demonstrate power in a relationship with a woman
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What it means to be a jerk in a divorce
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Learning how to change yourself
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Having someone else’s back — the foxhole mentality
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Chip’s pull towards God
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How to look at your divorce from a new perspective
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If your blood pressure is elevated, don’t respond
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The only thing we get to do is react to what happens
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What is ‘permissible free will’?
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Learning to become consistent by being accountable
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The only baggage you can unpack is your own
And so much more!
Connect with Chip Farley:
Email: chipfarley@gmail.com
Connect with Joe Staszak:
Website
Joe is wearing his heart on his sleeve in this episode of Divorce and Conquer as he reflects on where this show has taken him and what he’s learned so far — and where he’s going to next.
Joe credits his brother-in-law for teaching him the lesson of being ‘unoffendable’. Does ‘the pronoun thing’ offend you? Why? Learn to discipline your thoughts and let go of the crazy mediocrity in society that we can’t control — and gain more time and freedom in the process.
‘Unoffended people have more time!’ That’s Joe, giving it to us straight. He’s a guy’s guy in a crazy world, just trying to make sense of what is going on and showing us how we can sleep better, be more creative, and become more compassionate when we don’t sweat the small stuff. Let the Big Dawgg Hunt!
“If you think you’re a lost cause — and that goes back to the unredeemable part — you’re not. Everyone can be saved. I’m talking physically and spiritually. I’ll do the physical part and you’ll have to look upstairs for the spiritual part.” ~ Joe Staszak
In This Episode:
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Joe unpacks the movie ’Spirited’ as it relates to being unredeemable
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Joe speaks about answering his calling
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Joe addresses ‘the pronoun thing’
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Joe’s beef with the Washington Redskins name
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What does it mean to be ‘unoffendable’?
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Why waste your time on Twitter?
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Learning not to care about what people you don’t even know think
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Avoiding conversations that don’t lead to a resolution
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Why overlooking the small things is key
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Becoming more compassionate and practicing unconditional love
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Joe’s ex-wife finds out about this podcast!
And so much more!
Brett Datto: Celebrity Lawyer and Attorney for The Philadelphia Phillies. He’s chatting to Joe Staszak in today’s episode of Divorce and Conquer about how to get the most from your attorney, and how to ensure that you get a fair day in court.
It’s January, which means that it’s “divorce season” after the holidays. You’re only being prudent if you get your ducks in a row and prepare everything you can in the “he said, she said” argument that’s about to play out — and start costing you money! Brett has amazing advice from out of the gates with regard to how best you can prepare your interests.
Learn about how to set a budget with your attorney, how to get the right judge, what to do if you’re faced with allegations of abuse — and so much more. Brett is a ’super attorney’ (as related by his peers) and it’s clear to see why in this awesome conversation with Joe as he shoots from the hip while Joe reloads his legal gun with all the right questions and ammunition. Let the big dawg hunt!
“Do some background information — your own due diligence — on the relationship between the lawyer and the judge. And probably the easiest way to do that is to pull the judge’s campaign finance reports. It’s public information.” - Brett A. Datto
In This Episode:
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How can you ask a judge to recuse themselves?
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How do you get a level playing field in a court of law?
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Asking your attorney how much it’s going to cost
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How to calculate a budget for your legal bills
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What does it mean when your lawyer ‘nickel and dimes’ you?
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What is ‘Protection From Abuse’?
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Putting your ex’s feet under the fire when you’re faced with abuse allegations
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Brett’s outrageous story about a false abuse allegation
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How to protect yourself if you’re in the same space as someone accusing you
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Why does everyone lie in family court?
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What was it like representing Darren Daulton?
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Why did six former Phillies all get brain cancer?
And so much more!
Resources:
Divorce for Dummies
Darren Daulton Foundation
Connect with Brett Datto:
Website
Connect with Joe Staszak:
Joe is in the hot seat this week, with renowned Pennsylvania psychotherapist Katie Young delicately turning the tables on Joe and the circumstances that led to his divorces. Joe describes himself as a ‘right fighter’ — he doesn’t pick a fight unless he’s heard. Katie asks him to reflect on whether he wants to be right, or whether he wants to be heard.
Being heard, and then being understood, is more important than being right as we navigate new ways to deflate our destructive ego using things like IMAGO dialogue, and some other techniques offered by the brilliant Katie Young on this episode of Divorce and Conquer.
The soft side of Joe Staszak is something all men can relate to as we learn to be present and keep our emotions in check so that we can keep our marriage on track. Let the big dog hunt, sure. But maybe there’s a catch-and-release at play here if we’re in it for the long run and are looking to preserve our marriage while acting with integrity?
So put that ego aside and avoid that collateral damage with this lighthearted yet well-meaning episode of Divorce and Conquer as we save you the time and trouble of therapy with lessons you can start applying to your relationship today!
“I can’t remember a time when I laid into someone and then the next day felt good about it.” - Joe Staszak
In This Episode:
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When have you reflected on losing your cool with someone and not regretted it?
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Joe doesn’t fight.. unless he’s right
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What would you do differently if you could start your marriage over?
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How disarming something is validation
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Understanding IMAGO dialogue.
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Why simpler is better
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Is it a gender thing?
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ABD… Always Be Dating
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Is it my job to make you happy?
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Your chances of staying married increase if you wait till you’re 28.
Connect with Katie Young:
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Psychology Today
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Website
Connect with Joe Staszak:
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Twitter
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LinkedIn
Is there a greater pressure than dealing with divorce during the holiday period? Sure, it’s a first world problem, but as Bob Anderson so rightly points out, it’s still very real and very painful for many Americans at this time.
Bob Anderson is a former College Hockey player, current Conestoga high school coach and Staszak’s former hockey coach. He is in the Conestoga Hockey Hall of Fame. He’s also Joe’s mentor and life coach, who “spews nothing but wisdom”. So very true.
Over the past 40 years Bob Anderson has been studying the human condition and it’s relation to the individual soul and how those two forces impact and inform our lives. “Gratitude is an attitude” as Staszak puts it, asking Bob to elucidate on how gratitude is its own reward and how learning to be grateful means accepting who you are.
In this episode Staszak extracts so many gifts of insight from Anderson that deserve to be wrapped up and put under the Christmas tree. But they’re right here for you now to listen to and share in as we continue to bask in the glow of the holiday spirit, regardless of our current marital condition or status.
“Gratitude is about appreciating what you might take for granted, the things you already have. People don’t really talk about the gratitude of memory. Because memory takes perspective.” - Bob Anderson
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In This Episode:
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We are not the sum of our differences
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Divorce is a game of score keeping and no one wants to play
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Divorce will not resolve or cure the issues you brought with you into your marriage
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One of the greatest gifts to give someone is memories
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With gratitude comes grace
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The greatest present is being present
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How do we not ‘check out’?
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Everything is being done to increase pleasure and reduce pain
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Having your child say, “My dad was always there”
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‘Hard work beats talent if talent doesn’t work hard.”
And so much more!
Connect with Joe Staszak:
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Twitter
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LinkedIn
To thine own self be you. Joe Staszak is bringing in the big guns in this, his second episode, of Divorce and Conquer. He’s chatting to Bob Anderson, a former professional hockey player (who’s recently been inducted into the Hall of Fame), friend, and mentor about what it takes to have a successful marriage.
If you can’t bring an ‘I’ into the relationship there isn’t going to be a ‘we’, and Bob lays down quite clearly how we need to work on the ‘I’ so that we can bring that best version of ourselves to our relationship.
This is old school wisdom at its very best. Joe the big dog is lapping it up, and there’s advice on parenting and personal conduct that everyone can aspire to. Please join us to learn how you can be driven by your own needs while not at the expense of what could have been achieved together.
“You should feel better about yourself when you are being your true self, and taking your little amount of skills, and doing what you should be doing with them. And then share them with that special person you have an intimate relationship with — and then you’ll really feel good about yourself.”
~ Bob Anderson
In This Episode:
- Break the mold of acceptable levels of mediocrity
- Emerge stronger than ever from the divorce portal
- Lessons from the movie ‘Thief’
- Your soulmate is the person you want to strangle
- Till death do us part is not a life or death situation
- Why people feel betrayed in their marriage
- How do we fix the cracks?
- Being a slave to your own ego
- Marriages do not break up on show
- The responsibilities of parenting
- Health, Safety, Manners, Education
- Always Be Present
And so much more!
Connect with Joe Staszak:
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Twitter
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LinkedIn
Are you at a crossroads and talking about going through the divorce portal? Divorce and Conquer is here to help you through whatever suffering you are going through in your marriage.
Former sports broadcaster turned coach Joe Staszak is bringing all of his hard-earned experience to a show that will help you figure out your next smart move if your marriage is on the rocks.Joe combines an authentic blend of remorse and inspiration, sports metaphors and life hacks, as he lays out his plan to coach you through your divorce.
‘Play the tape to the end’ is the takeout theme from this episode as Joe asks us to write down the consequences of an action you might take and then visualize the consequences.
It’s the holiday season, and it’s time to put down your weapons. Stick around with Joe and he’ll show you how resentment and anger have been replaced by patience and love in his life. It’s all here, on Divorce and Conquer. As Joe says, ‘Let the big dog hunt!’
“The number one rule here at Divorce and Conquer is: kids come first.” - Joe Staszak
In This Episode:
- How is your decision going to affect your children?
- It’s never too late to do the right thing
- How sports emulates life
- Put your weapons down during the holiday season
- What’s the best way to diffuse an argument with your wife?
- Think about the consequences of your actions
- Don’t be a ‘right fighter’
- Make a decision to know where you are going
- Choosing a coach over a therapist
- Finding a good marriage counselor
- Watch A Good Life!
And so much more!
Connect with Joe Staszak:
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Twitter
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LinkedIn
Divorce and Conquer takes a no nonsense, hard core approach to not only the divorce arena but to the SHOW! Yes, the SHOW! The SHOW is your life and Divorce and a Conquer will prepare you to perform on the biggest stage and under the brightest lights under the most dire of circumstances.
Are you tired of the self-fulfilling negative behavioral patterns and toxicity that has brought you to where you are right now?
If you’re the kind of person who shudders at the thought of conforming to a society that celebrates mediocrity and has no interest in apologizing for it, then you’re in the right place. Each week I’ll give you actionable tips on how to navigate this challenging yet rewarding journey. Yes you heard that correctly. Rewarding journey.
Divorce and Conquer is all about winning and right now your biggest adversary is most likely you!
If you’re tired of being bullied by the family court system, your spouse, your boss and a soft yet judgmental society that tries to push you to towards the mean, then lace ‘em up and pay attention.
You want to be a Champion? Then start playing like one!
This is your wake up call!
Let’s go to work!
Subscribe now so you don’t miss a single episode!