Grief in Brief: Recent Episodes
Ken Barringer
Grief in Brief is a podcast hosted by Ken Barringer, LMHC a mental health counselor with a specialty in grief and loss. He is the director of H.E.A.L.I.N.G. (Helping Everyone Accept Loss Instead of Neglecting Grief).
In each episode you will hear a conversation about the management of grief and loss. Most episodes are between 15 – 20 minutes in length. There is also great irony in the title as Grief is NOT Brief. In fact, it’s a marathon in a world that loves sprints!
Litsa is the Program Director and Co-founder of What’s Your Grief?. WYG is an online support and resource for all things grief. WYG has an emphasis on the unique experience and relationship we all have with loss. By sharing, exploring, and expressing we find that what is most personal applies to all. Further, they accentuate the benefit of community and the need for psychoeducation to compliment the compassion we all need for healing. Whether you are a griever, professional or someone supporting a griever WYG can be a home base. In this episode, Ken and Litsa discuss how What’s Your Grief? came to be. Further, they discuss the need for continual education as we are all touched by loss.
https://whatsyourgrief.com/
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The grief market may have a number of resources, guides and/or supports for the death of a spouse or parent. What about when your sibling dies? There are scant if any resources available. Annie discovered this after her brother was killed by a suicide bomber in Afghanistan. In fact, much of what is available is how siblings can care for their grieving parent. Feedback, that can be minimizing, is what siblings need to do, not how they feel. The lack of understanding and attention to sibling loss inspired Annie to write her book; Always A Sibling; the Forgotten Mourners Guide to Grief. For anyone who has lost a sibling this book is a valuable resource.
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Charles’ new book is titled I Will Do Better; a Father’s memoir of heartbreak, parenting and love. This unflinching memoir comes from the heart and goes right to the heart as six months into parenting his daughter (Lily) his wife and life partner Diana was diagnosed with cancer. Cancer took Diana’s life three days before Lily turned 3. Finding himself a widower his process begins of learning to parent while grieving. With a delicate, yet forceful blend of acknowledging pain and inserting humor Charles discusses this undertaking, and the book, with Ken.
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This is the title of Rachel’s book in which she writes of the life with her husband and family before and after his death by suicide. She called upon her skills as a journalist to see where there is a story, dig deep and write it. Rachel has done just that in this poignant memoir. How does she take the first steps after the sudden and traumatic death of her husband while raising two young children? In this episode Rachel talks of the benefits of community, asking for help and using her available resources to move forward. She further discusses the beneficial need to keep her children in their routines and patterns which can be so grounding. With an emphasis on growth, positivity and hope Rachel book will be resonant with anyone who has lost someone.
https://www.rachelzimmerman.net/
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These terms and concepts are part of our vernacular but what do they mean and what do they look like? Further, we know that things like identity, language, and stories can get lost from generation to generation. However, they may also hold some of the roots to healing. We can learn and heal from our past and how our ancestors lived. How do we navigate and shift from post traumatic stress to post traumatic growth? In this lively discussion, Ken and Serena discuss these critical concepts.
In this episode Ken sits with one of his first grief educators to discuss her remarkable career working in the field of grief and bereavement. Deborah’s work spans decades and venues – hospitals, cancer units, the Good Grief program, 911 consultations, independent bereavement programs. What has stayed consistent through the years and locations is this: How do we talk about it? How do we help children and adults feel empowered and confident that they can manage? How do we educate communities, organizations, and the culture at large to use language that engages, acknowledges, and affirms those who are grieving? Ken and Deborah talk about the use of language and how the words we use can lead to building confidence.
Zach was 16 when he died of Osteosarcoma. Zach loved life, lived it to its fullest and the diagnosis left the Walls facing “pre-bereavement”. Pre-bereavement encompasses three things; 1. Anticipatory grief, these are feelings of grief and loss we may come to experience. 2. We change in relation to the loss. How we look at all things will be different now. 3. Using our limited time between diagnosis and death in ways that matter. As a way to honor their son and carry his loss forward with them, the Wall’s developed Zach’s Bridge. Zach’s Bridge helps ease the journey by providing 1:1 peer support for advanced and bereaved pediatric cancer parents and caregivers. This kind of support delivered from those who have walked those tragic steps can give a family comfort and time to focus on what truly matters. https://www.zachsbridge.org/
When Hannah’s best friend died unexpectedly, she looked for help. Friends, family, mental health professionals could only go so far. She started an exhaustive search for friend loss support and found……nothing. Friend grief, like all grief, is a lifelong process yet there are scant resources for those who truly understand the impact of losing a trusted friend. Friend loss is neither family or romantic loss and thus isn’t always given the same level of attention and understanding that blood or partner loss does. After getting repeated messages (from herself) to do something and raise awareness about friend loss Hannah started the Friends Missing Friends podcast. This community of grievers now has a home.
https://www.friendsmissingfriends.com/
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When Matt’s father died his world turned upside down. He was thrust into taking over the family business while grieving the loss. He was also concerned about preserving the memory of his father and learning from others through their experience of his father. All the while trying to keep him present through the story telling. What was launched from this desire was Life Books. Everyone’s story is worth telling and worth sharing. The fear of not sharing is that over time the memories will fade. Matt discusses his passion and purpose behind starting Life Books. https://lifebooks.io/
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Our respect, appreciation and understanding that pets are part of our family, life and social network has always been known. However, our actions did not always show this. Many of us have heard some version of, “Sorry, your dog died…. are you going to get another one?” as if pets are merely commodities. Niki brings grace, dignity and respect to end of life care for animals - just as we would humans. The vital role of an end of life doula is something to become aware of. Niki highlights the valuable position doulas play at such a difficult time for pet owners.
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What is a parent to do when they are parenting a child with a serious or life limiting illness? The range of supports cross over medical, mental health, palliative care and embracing anticipatory grief. Then there is advocacy for your child and managing the needs of the other members of your family. This is overwhelming. Blyth was faced with this when her daughter, and also her nephew, was diagnosed with Tay-Sachs, a rare and incurable genetic illness that ends in early death. Resulting from this tragedy Blyth founded the Courageous Parents Network in 2014 to support those trying to navigate an unfathomable road. She shares her story with Ken in this episode.
https://courageousparentsnetwork.org/
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Maureen is a holistic psychiatrist and soul mentor for people trying to manage their stress, anxiety, depression or whatever else is in the way of their finding the best versions of themselves. Trained in the medical model of care it wasn’t until the sudden death of her sister did Maureen start to think about the management of grief and loss in ways other than with medication. What she found amongst many things was meditation, spirituality and ways of recalibrating your nervous system. She discusses this Ken along with soul mentoring. https://maureenmagauran.com
https://maureen-magauran-school-ea03.thinkific.com/courses/light-in-darkness-finding-hope-in-death
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In 2013, Donna was a mother of three children and hadn’t worked professionally in a few years when her husband died suddenly. Donna was faced with an unimaginable loss and the finances started to dwindle. Not having a road map for either, she sought a financial planner and found one who really “got her” and understood the complexity that was her life. Getting the support she needed Donna was motivated to go back to school and study to be a financial planner. Soon thereafter she started Sephton Financial with a specialty practice in helping widows and newly single parents. This inspiring give-back story is discussed with Ken in this episode (Along with her books, A Guide to Widowhood and A Guide to Blended Families. )
Learn more about Donna and her work at her website: https://www.donnajeankendrick.com/
Donna also has a webinar you might find beneficial: Don't leave your loved ones without answers.
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How do we find hope and joy again after a devastating loss? Will I ever be happy again? Yes you will just not quickly and not necessarily from resources outside of yourself. Conventional wisdom and feedback to grievers can center around people telling us what we should be doing/feeling, not how to attain this. The answers often lie within us. We know that trauma and grief force us to change but we have the power to control how we change. Ken and Rachel discuss the process in this episode.
https://thegriefgal.com/
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The grief market may have a number of resources, guides and/or supports for the death of a spouse or parent. What about when your sibling dies? There are scant if any resources available. Annie discovered this after her brother was killed by a suicide bomber in Afghanistan. In fact, much of what is available is how siblings can care for their grieving parent. Feedback, that can be minimizing, is what siblings need to do, not how they feel. The lack of understanding and attention to sibling loss inspired Annie to write her book; Always A Sibling; the Forgotten Mourners Guide to Grief. For anyone who has lost a sibling this book is a valuable resource.
Enjoy this episode? Please give us a 5-star rating and share with someone who could benefit. Thanks for helping us get the show to more people who need it!
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In this episode Ken shares some ideas of things to consider as we are in holiday season. Included is evaluating our “do lists”. Do the holidays feel special because of this? Do I try doing this differently” Do I do this out of habit, ritual, or obligation? Do I need help with this? Do I even like doing this?
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Judy has been an empathic healer for longer than she probably knew she was. Practicing for over 35 years, her understanding of healing went to another level when her son Ben died by suicide. Resulting from Ben’s death has been Ben Speaks a program brought to schools based on foundational principles of empowerment, wellness, community and collaboration and accountability. Further, Judy works with mothers who have had a child die. She brings training and certification in the Grief Recovery Method as well as having the intangible of being a member of the club as well. She discusses her process with Ken in this episode.
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When faced with a medical condition our first instinct may be to find a solution to the problem. How do we fix this? What is the treatment plan? When a disease is rare there may not be a solution. When this happens, we need to shift gears. Jessica’s daughter Dalia was diagnosed with a rare degenerative disease at age 5 and lived another 12 years before dying. With her book Breath Taking; A Memoir of Family, Dreams and Broken Genes Jessica writes on concepts we might think as contradictory. We can find pain and joy, be fearful and fearless, have times of despair and hope. In this episode, Jessica talks with a genuineness and optimism that is inspiring to those who have loved and lost.
www.jessicafeinstories.com
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October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. Katie is a nurse practioner who has been leading a perinatal loss group since before the pandemic. Sara is a member of the group whose daughter Jane died after 1 day of life. In this episode they discuss with Ken the process of telling your story, the sadness and hope that comes from it, and how the group continues to provide meaning and support. Nuggets of wisdom along with the post traumatic growth belief that your loss will never get smaller but your world can get bigger seem to be gifts that Jane is leaving for Sara and the group.
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Charles’ new book is titled I Will Do Better; a Father’s memoir of heartbreak, parenting and love. This unflinching memoir comes from the heart and goes right to the heart as six months into parenting his daughter (Lily) his wife and life partner Diana was diagnosed with cancer. Cancer took Diana’s life three days before Lily turned 3. Finding himself a widower his process begins of learning to parent while grieving. With a delicate, yet forceful blend of acknowledging pain and inserting humor Charles discusses this undertaking, and the book, with Ken.
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Ken has been working with grievers for close to 30 years and what he has consistently heard from them, be they children or elderly, are things people say that are just not helpful. Granted as a society we are “grief averse” which often makes conversations around supporting grievers an awkward one. It doesn’t have to be this way. In this episode Ken lays out words and phrases that are conversations enders, offensive, or simply not supportive. In its place he substitutes conversation starters, words to engage and acknowledge loss that can increase our connectedness during vulnerable times.
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This is the title of Colin Campbell’s highly impactful book chronicling his grief process in the aftermath of the death of his two teenage children. Ruby and Hart were killed by a drunk and high driver in 2019. A week after their death Colin began writing an acclaimed play titled Grief: A One Man Shitshow. With rawness, rage, and humor we walk the painful steps with him. When the pandemic began the show was put on hold and gave birth to the book. Filled with helpful “action steps”, it’s a must read for grievers and this episode a must listen.
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Note: This is a re-broadcasted episode that originally aired on Nov. 29, 2023.
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The concept of mindfulness is discussed liberally in our culture. We may have a notion that mindfulness can help us feel calm, relaxed and at peace. While this all can be true, mindfulness is really centered on sitting with whatever arises in the present moment. Here is where mindfulness is such a helpful practice for grievers. What arises is not always pleasant, we may have upsetting thoughts. However, these thoughts could be the pathway towards feeling more peaceful. With mindfulness practice we are acknowledging, not avoiding, or minimizing, our pain. In this manner we engage and learn to manage grief. Ken and Ariel dive deep into mindfulness and the benefits of “practice”.
https://dr-arielbotta.com/
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We often ascribe a higher status to performers and athletes. We can see them as somehow impervious to grief, loss, and pain. We may recognize their physical pain and resilience to get back to where they were. However, with grief we are never the same after a loss, thus the concept of resilience and returning to “normal” falls to the side. Performers and athletes grieve the loss of a season or show ending along with that of the community which was established. They grieve physical injuries, retirements, not “making the cut” or expectations being unmet. Dr Tasha Trujillo is a performance and sports psychologist well versed in this topic. Her new book And She Was Never the Same Again is a multigenerational memoir which dives into many of these areas as well as other areas we may not think of loss arising.
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It’s the summer and if you’re a child it can and should be a time of play! This episode is part 2 of 2, and is dedicated to the fine art of play.
When Ken got together with Steve and Jon their cumulative years of experience using play as a therapeutic tool was close to 100 years. Steve is the Chief Playmaker for the Life is Good Playmakers and Jon is the Executive Director at the Children’s Room. Both programs have their own unique approach toward supporting children as does Ken’s experience as Director of the Academy of Physical and Social Development. The conversation for this podcast is quite, well, ….. playful!
https://www.lifeisgood.com/playmakerproject/project-home.html
https://childrensroom.org/
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It’s the summer and if you’re a child it can and should be a time of play! This episode is part 1 of 2, and is dedicated to the fine art of play.
When Ken got together with Steve and Jon their cumulative years of experience using play as a therapeutic tool was close to 100 years. Steve is the Chief Playmaker for the Life is Good Playmakers and Jon is the Executive Director at the Children’s Room. Both programs have their own unique approach toward supporting children as does Ken’s experience as Director of the Academy of Physical and Social Development. The conversation for this podcast is quite, well, ….. playful!
Part 2 will drop later this month!
https://www.lifeisgood.com/playmakerproject/project-home.html
https://childrensroom.org/
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The title of this episode is also the title of Christina’s new book. As a mental health provider, teacher, trainer, artist and griever Christina has supported thousands in their grief process in multiple ways. She has developed grief support concepts such as The Waiting Room and The Life Reentry Model. When speaking with Christina wisdom flows from her words and she is one of the rare people whose knowledge translates beautifully to the written word. Ken and Christina also discuss her two previous books: Second Firsts and Where Did You Go?.
Link to her website: https://christinarasmussen.com/
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What do you do when an unfathomable tragedy such as losing both your parents at the age of 3 happens to you? You grow up to be a grief therapist who supports those who are members of the parentless, parents club. While Randi’s grief support expands to many walking their first steps after a loss it is with honor and dignity, she contributes to the healing of those who are parentless parents. She discusses utilizing, individual, group, and family counseling along with the use of rituals in an impassioned way in talking with Ken.
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Chronic mental health and mental illness impact not only those who suffer from them but also their extended families and support systems. There are associated losses around expectations and hopes for those connected to the person. A diagnosis and a hospitalization can be traumatic and have a feeling of grief for the “patient” as well as their networks. The corresponding feelings are often thought of as behavioral responses but might have their roots in grief reactions. Similarly, the stigma of mental illness parallels stigmatized deaths. Craig Keefe is a social worker who has been the Executive Director of Clinical Services for an inpatient psychiatric hospital. He and Ken discuss these non-death losses in this episode.
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Our autonomic nervous system (ANS) is our friend. It tries to protect us when we are faced with threat, danger, or any time we perceive the situation to not be safe. The ANS controls unconscious bodily processes and has two main branches. The sympathetic branch controls our fight or flight responses while the parasympathetic branch helps us to "rest and digest" and feel emotionally safe and socially engaged. However, a very primitive aspect of the parasympathetic branch controls our freeze response and can slow us down and generate feelings of hopelessness and a perception of the world being dark and dangerous. Our previous experience of trauma and loss help determine how these systems balance each other. Sometimes the nervous system overreacts, and sometimes it under-reacts. Matt and Ken discuss strategies and interventions for keeping ourselves aligned when we have been thrown out of alignment by overwhelming circumstances. Enjoy this episode? Please give us a 5-star rating and share with someone who could benefit. Thanks for helping us get the show to more people who need it!
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Approximately 85% of the kids the My Life, My Choice program serves in eastern Ma are involved with DCF. Just by being in DCF care indicates a history of trauma before being trafficked. Wherever there is trauma there is grief. Lisa co-developed and co-executive directs My Life, My Choice. The program she has developed incorporates a survivor led staff focusing on values of empowerment, equity, community, and unconditional love to name a few.
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Visit the My Life, My Choice website here: https://www.mylifemychoice.org/
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What is EMDR? Perhaps you’ve heard of it but don’t know what it is. Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. While practitioners may vary their approach to implementing this form of therapy the intended outcomes are similar: Reduce the stress and distress connected to traumatic memories. Dance Movement Therapy utilizes the connection between movement and emotion to aid in people gaining greater physical, emotional, and cognitive awareness. This will ultimately improve one’s mental health. Genevieve’s psychotherapy practice blends EMDR and DMT to promote healing in those who are grieving, have experienced trauma, are anxious and/or have low self-esteem.
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People can come to know us through the activities we engage in. What happens to our identity when we are absent from those activities? When we sustain a physical injury that prohibits us from doing the things we like to do, we lose a little piece of who we are. Physical therapy may heal the physical problem but what about the psychological part? That can take longer, extending our time away from ‘who we are’. Jane is a psychologist well versed in the psychological response and recovery from physical injury. She shares her knowledge with Ken in this episode.
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Loss is continuous throughout our lifetime. Even though we know this our instinct might be to push away this reality. When we have had complicated, continuous and/or traumatic loss these can trigger additional mental health issues. There are many interventions and paths to help reduce the suffering. When “nothing works” the use of Esketamine in conjunction with treatments can aid in ‘treatment-resistant’ clients. Kurt is a social worker and the vice president of community partnerships at the Brattleboro Retreat in Vermont. He and Ken talk about the impact of loss, use of esketamine, and the new frontier of using psychedelics.
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Approximately 25% of women have some type of reproductive health issues. These can range from being able to get pregnant, stay pregnant or have post pregnancy complications. Both females and males have a birth story. This story can start when they are very young and begin to think what it may be like to be a parent one day. When conception is not as simple as “just getting pregnant”, grief and the associated mental health concerns can arise. Further, the intense personal nature of reproductive health issues can silence those going through it - intensifying the loss response. Ken and Julie discuss the often-unaddressed loss issues related to reproductive health challenges.
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Cory is a news anchor for NBC10 Boston. He has also worked as a field and investigative reporter during his career. In this episode Cory, an Edward Murrow and Emmy award winner, describes how many stories in the news involve grief – from death or non-death losses. Covering loss can have an impact on the mind and soul of the reporter. Reporters are humans too and when your job requires you to engage traumatic scenes and talk with people who are having “maybe the worst day of their life” it’s a lot to manage. Reporters do this daily! Cory speaks with dedication and clarity of how to do the work in a compassionate manner.
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When Sasha was 7 years old, she knew she experienced things differently than others her age. She had visions and images of those in another world. While this felt confusing, overwhelming, and scary, over time she cultivated this gift into being a conduit between those grieving someone who had died and the deceased. She knows when she gets the vibrational feeling connecting into others and when she doesn’t. With genuine authenticity and unrelenting compassion Sasha describes the healing process that comes through for psychic mediums and how they help grievers.
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While some people are familiar with birth doulas not many are aware of death doulas. Birth doulas help prospective parents bring a child into the world, death doulas assist people in helping their loved ones exit the world. Pamela is a certified death doula and describes how they help the bereaved embrace loss through empowerment and awareness of options to celebrate a life. “Living wakes” and the use of psychedelic assisted support are among the many options discussed in this episode.
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After the sudden and tragic losses of her brother and teenage son within a short period of time, songs Deb had written previously took on new meaning and purpose. Further, the need for movement, expressing through art and nature and connecting with others was never more paramount. This culminated with her book, Book of Walks. In this spirited episode Ken and Deb discuss this process of moving through highly intense and acute grief to having a shared experience with nature and others.
To view a video of Deb's contribution to the Solstice Celebration at Mount Auburn Cemetary, click this link: https://www.debtoddwheeler.org/news
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In 2022 the Grief in Brief podcast engaged in discussions with Authors Rebecca Soffer and E.B. Bartels. Also presented in back-to-back format is Rebecca discussing Modern Loss: Candid Conversations About Loss: Beginners Welcome in the previously re-broadcasted episode, and E.B. leading us through pet loss conversations in Good Grief; On Loving Pets, Here and Hereafter in this one.
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In 2022, the Grief in Brief podcast engaged in discussions with Authors Rebecca Soffer and E.B. Bartels. Also presented in back-to-back format is Rebecca discussing Modern Loss: Candid Conversations About Loss: Beginners Welcome and in the next episode, you'll hear E.B. leading us through pet loss conversations in Good Grief; On Loving Pets, Here and Hereafter.
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Following up on two episodes back with author Colin Campbell we decided to rebroadcast Grief in Brief episodes featuring authors Susan Verde and Maria Sirois. In the previous episode, you will hear Susan discuss her book Say One Kind Thing, Lessons in Acceptance, Love and Letting Go and in this episode, Maria will talk about positive psychology and its influence on her book A Short Course in Happiness After Loss.
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Following up on the last episode with author Colin Campbell we decided to rebroadcast Grief in Brief episodes featuring authors Susan Verde and Maria Sirois. You will hear Susan discuss her book Say One Kind Thing, Lessons in Acceptance, Love and Letting Go and Maria will talk about positive psychology and its influence on her book A Short Course in Happiness After Loss. Their episodes are being rebroadcasted back-to-back.
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This is the title of Colin Campbell’s highly impactful book chronicling his grief process in the aftermath of the death of his two teenage children. Ruby and Hart were killed by a drunk and high driver in 2019. A week after their death Colin began writing an acclaimed play titled Grief: A One Man Shitshow. With rawness, rage, and humor we walk the painful steps with him. When the pandemic began the show was put on hold and gave birth to the book. Filled with helpful “action steps”, it’s a must read for grievers and this episode a must listen.
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Chronic mental health and mental illness impact not only those who suffer from them but also their extended families and support systems. There are associated losses around expectations and hopes for those connected to the person. A diagnosis and a hospitalization can be traumatic and have a feeling of grief for the “patient” as well as their networks. The corresponding feelings are often thought of as behavioral responses but might have their roots in grief reactions. Similarly, the stigma of mental illness parallels stigmatized deaths. Craig Keefe is a social worker who has been the Executive Director of Clinical Services for an inpatient psychiatric hospital. He and Ken discuss these non-death losses in this episode.
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This is the title of Dr Peter Langman’s most recent book which he discusses with Ken. Dr. Langman is the Director of Research and School Safety Training at Drift Net and was a researcher for five years with the National Threat Assessment Center of the U.S. Secret Service. He reminds us that “We’re all on duty”, dispels the myths and stereotypes of shooter’s profiles, and asks us to be aware of students who reveal their intentions. Lastly, we discuss motivations and justifications shooters can make and what may be some barriers to people taking action and speaking up.
Warning this episodes contains discussions about homicides, rage violence, disturbing behavior and remorseless children and teens.
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Steve Watson has been the senior pastor at the Reservoir Church in Cambridge, Mass. since July 2013. Together with Ken they discuss the inclusive community that is the Reservoir Church. Their talk includes the non-death losses that can apply to marginalized people, and about weekly community based group discussions where members can be heard and validated, regardless of any religious overlay. Lastly, a frank conversation where religion may not be helpful, and can be helpful, is portrayed.
Enjoy this episode? Review the grief in brief podcast between now and October 31st and be eligible for a free consultation. On November 2nd those who have posted a review on Itunes will be entered into a drawing with one person picked at random to receive a 30 minute consultation.
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In this episode Ken talks with Jon Gay the Executive Director of the Children’s Room. They discuss the many avenues for addressing child loss and bereavement. The Children’s Room believes “no child should grieve alone” and thus create a “space and a place” for children and their caregivers. By utilizing a peer support group model which involves talk, play therapy and art therapy they help children remember and stay connected to their deceased person. Further, the Children’s Room conducts psychoeducational programs for “parents while grieving” as well as train professionals who work with grieving children.
Enjoy this episode? Review the grief in brief podcast between now and October 31st and beeligible for a free consultation! On November 2nd those who have posted a review on Itunes will be entered into a drawing with one person picked at random to receive a 30 minute consultation.
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In this episode Ken talks with the founder and executive director of Horse SenseAbility, Polly Kornblith. Polly got her start with the therapeutic use of animals by utilizing therapy dogs with adolescent males in a residential facility. From there grew her current program of horseback riding and care for horses with children, adolescents’ and young adults who have experienced grief, loss, and/or trauma. While many equestrian programs aid those with physical or cognitive issues, Horse SenseAbility addresses the mental health needs. An enlightening conversation that upon reflection makes “sense”.
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Jennifer Wiles is the Director of Heartplay and Camp Erin programs at Good Shepherd Community Care. She is also on the Board of Directors for the National Alliance for Children’s Grief. In this episode she discusses with Ken trends in child bereavement - both the kinds of losses that are bringing children and teens in for counseling and how their expressions of grief are manifesting in sessions. Also discussed will be new perspectives in the field to improve efficacy of service.
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During the months of July and August, we're re-broadcasting some of our top listened to episodes here on the podcast. Enjoy!
Why is there an episode on a grief podcast with two brothers who run a boxing gym? In addition to the physical benefits from conditioning and exercise, gyms can be another place to find community. We know that having a community where one can feel a sense of belonging and connection can be highly therapeutic. With energy and passion Mark, Matt, and Ken discuss this concept.
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During the months of July and August, we're re-broadcasting some of our top listened to episodes here on the podcast. Enjoy!
In this episode, Ken meets with Kathy Seltzer, an acupuncture care specialist to describe how emotions and feelings can get stored in the body causing physical problems. Acupuncture can free up the body to release these feelings and reduce physical and emotional pain. A practitioner of Chinese medicine for over 25 years, she discusses the beauty and simplicity of the craft.
Follow Ken on Instagram by clicking here HERE
Download his free self care worksheets by clicking HERE
During the months of July and August, we'll be re-broadcasting some of our top listened to episodes here on the podcast. Enjoy!
In this episode Ken talks with psychologist and author, Matt Hersh about the growing field of energy psychology. Matt has been practicing for many years using EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques). These techniques are an evidenced based treatment method. The increased use and efficacy in helping people find relief from suffering is growing within the field of mental health. Matt has also recently published a book on Self-Care for helping professionals called the Thriving Therapist.
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During the months of July and August, we'll be re-broadcasting some of our top listened to episodes here on the podcast. Enjoy!
In this episode Ken sits with the Cofounder and CEO of Modern Loss, Rebecca Soffer. They discuss the development of the Global Community that is Modern Loss and how the telling of your story and having it validated is such a pathway to healing. Rebecca blends a warm, caring and a straightforward (at times humorous) approach to moving through grief. They also discuss how she came from a journalism background to speaking internationally on the topic of grief.
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Lisa Coppola is a licensed mental health counselor who works with adult adoptees, she also has her own adoption story and history. She understands the duality of appreciating and having gratitude for adoption but also recognizing 4 types of loss that can be associated. Those losses include; loss of roots; loss of trust as a first experience; loss of physiological and emotional health; disenfranchisement of grief. Lisa is passionate about her work and has helped many recognize the unstated feelings that might be going on with them.
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Stu McLeod’s sister Sara was a highly educated, decorated, and acclaimed psychologist. She was a sought-after expert in the field of childhood trauma and sexual abuse. She then became stricken with early-onset Alzheimer’s and the course of her family’s life was altered. Just before she died Stu became involved with the Alzheimer’s association raising money for their legislative as well as research needs. In 2018 he started the Washburn Challenge which is now one of the nation’s largest fundraisers for the association’s Longest Day fundraising event. Stu has become an advocate for raising Alzheimer’s awareness and working tirelessly towards educating and finding hope for advancements in treatment.
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On the night of December 20, 2021 Sandy Carter was at her boxing gym. She was in very good shape, felt fabulous, healthy, and then everything went blank. She woke up in a hospital on Christmas Eve morning and her first question was “who is teaching the class?” Sandy had gone into Sudden Cardiac Arrest, revived, and placed in a cold coma. In this episode Sandy describes the process of coming out of the coma and raising awareness to educating people about Sudden Cardiac Arrest.
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Maria first began studying the field of resilience over 30 years ago which organically led her to the science of positive psychology. Being able to hold paradoxical feelings simultaneously (“I can be sad and also happy”) is the key to living a full life and at the heart of positivity and wellness. Living as if everything is “great” or the world is “terrible” are rooted in delusional thought. However, tapping into our “emotional and cognitive agility” allows us to find resilience, happiness, and overall health. Ken and Maria discuss the exciting field and concepts of positive psychology.
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This is the title of NY Times, bestselling author Susan Verde’s new book. An accomplished children’s author Susan dives into her first book for adults with a candid and honest memoir.
In this episode, Ken and Susan discuss chapters dealing with nondeath losses as well as the chapter chronicling her father’s death. They’ll also discuss how self-compassion plays such a vital role in the management.
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Dr. Lara Milane is a professor and researcher at Northeastern University. In this episode she discusses in a tender and raw way the death of her twin sister, Samantha Tari Jabr (Sam), died just before their 19th birthday. Lara describes with great candor and authenticity the traumas before and with Sam’s death. Lara continues to feel a very strong connection to Sam’s presence which motivates her quest for knowledge, learning, teaching, and helping others.
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Dr. Lara Milane is a professor and researcher at Northeastern University. In this episode she discusses in a tender and raw way the death of her twin sister, Samantha Tari Jabr (Sam), died just before their 19th birthday. Lara describes with great candor and authenticity the traumas before and with Sam’s death. Lara continues to feel a very strong connection to Sam’s presence which motivates her quest for knowledge, learning, teaching, and helping others.
Enjoy this episode? Please give us a 5-star rating and share with someone who could benefit. Thanks for helping us get the show to more people who need it!
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When Mai Richmond was 5 years old her father died from a two-year battle with cancer. She attended the Heartplay bereavement program, and it was the community and welcoming she needed to start to make sense of the world and her place in it. Mai was particularly influenced by the teen mentors in the program. In fact, she was so influenced that when her first grade teacher gave the “what do you want to be when you grow up” assignment Mai wrote “A grief counselor” When she aged out of the Heartplay program she became a teen mentor as a form of giving back. Now a senior in high school, Mai continues to give back.
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Julie Brennan is the founder and director of We Do Care, a grief and loss support center. The inspiration for Julie was that when she had a 3 year old and was 3 months pregnant, Julie got a knock on the door one night that no one ever wants to get; her husband was in a car crash and was killed. We Do Care offers Young Widows Connection groups, Social Connection Groups, Support services for children who have lost a parent and other special events.
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Today's episode is a rebroadcasted episode from back in October, in honor of Mark directing a play, Time Stand's Still, that's opening this week! (For more info and tickets to the upcoming shows in Reading, MA., please click here.)
The narrative as a play unfolds often has underpinnings of grief and/or non-death loss. Even in comedies! Sometimes, this is obvious and sometimes it’s a bit more subtle. The entrance into the characters psyche in the live format that is theatre can be powerful. Also, the “audience as a group” can validate and break down any feelings of isolation the viewer may be having. Mark has been a local to Boston theatre director for over 20 years and in this episode he and Ken discuss the access and education we get into characters management of the loss.
Ken goes on the other side of the microphone to discuss his history of friend loss. Having had many friends die throughout his childhood and adolescence help to “install grief DNA” and set him on a career path of becoming a counselor.
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In the aftermath of a loss, as we are setting sail to parts unknown, we begin looking for a map. Where do we look? For over 70 years The Parmenter Foundation has been a charitable organization providing hope, support, and compassionate end-of-life care for those in the Boston Metrowest community. But more than that, Parmenter provides grants and resources for child and adolescent bereavement, hospice, pet loss as well as businesses facing loss, to name a few. In this episode, Ken talks with Parmenter’s executive director Angela Crocker.
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We often romanticize adolescence as a time of growth, emerging adulthood, and challenging beliefs. What gets left behind in emerging teens is perhaps the innocence of the world being smaller, kinder, gentler. Some teens bridge this change through substance use. When the substance use takes over there is social, emotional, developmental and learning lags. Recovery also has it’s own sense of losing the life, and friends and systems one had in place. Joelle Bush is school counselor at the Ostiguy Recovery High School in Boston and the 2021 recipient of the MASCA school counselor leadership award. Joelle and Ken discuss the process in this episode.
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Wildflower is a program that helps children rediscover life after a loss. Wildflower supports children throughout their childhood and adolescence to have a fun summer. The support is financial and emotional in helping children (and their widowed parent) shift the paradigm from challenges of an unstructured summer to the joys of a camp experience. Audrey is the Executive Director of Wildflower and discusses the process in this episode.
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Pamela has directed bereavement programs for children and teens throughout her professional life and in the course of this work emphasized and researched the concept of Post Traumatic Growth. PTG is a theory that aims to describe positive changes and transformations that can accompany a traumatic and tragic event. In this episode Pamela and Ken discuss her work in acknowledging that while the loss can never get smaller, the child’s world can get bigger.
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Why is there an episode on a grief podcast with two brothers who run a boxing gym? In addition to the physical benefits from conditioning and exercise, gyms can be another place to find community. We know that having a community where one can feel a sense of belonging and connection can be highly therapeutic. With energy and passion Mark, Matt, and Ken discuss this concept.
Follow Ken on Instagram HERE
Download the free self care worksheets HERE
Why is there an episode on a grief podcast with an attorney? Among the many stressors, uncertainties and anxieties that come with loss the legal documentation can be another stressor (and sometimes nice distraction). In this episode Ken and Susan discuss documentation related to power-of-attorney, health care proxies as well as wills and estates. Susan is a partner in the firm of Brier, Marandett and Rossetti.
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There are times when physical hurts can lead to psychological distress or psychological distress can go to the body in the form of physical pain. Kim discusses with Ken in this episode how massage therapy can be of physical and mental benefit. Treatments can be corrective, proactive or maintenance in nature. Nevertheless, the literal and metaphorical release of hurts in our bodies can bring relief.
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What we eat, how we eat, when we eat can be habitual. “While you form habits, your habits form you”, says Gabrielle McGrath a register dietician and nutrition coach who is the founder of the Wellpower Method. When we are grieving or struggling in our day to day we may fall back on old habits of eating – healthy or not. What behaviors around eating do you want to reinforce or extinguish? In this episode Ken and Gabrielle will talk about the impact of food on how we are doing mentally as well as physically. Food, and the absence or abundance of it, is always present in our lives and in our thinking.
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Pets are part of our family; they are with us through perhaps some of our biggest life moments, they love us unconditionally and consistently show up for us. They are never too busy, overscheduled or don’t have time. In this episode Ken and E.B. discuss the complexities of the process when a pet dies.
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The narrative as a play unfolds often has underpinnings of grief and/or non-death loss. Even in comedies! Sometimes, this is obvious and sometimes it’s a bit more subtle. The entrance into the characters psyche in the live format that is theatre can be powerful. Also, the “audience as a group” can validate and break down any feelings of isolation the viewer may be having. Mark has been a local to Boston theatre director for over 20 years and in this episode he and Ken discuss the access and education we get into characters management of the loss.
Follow Ken on Instagram HERE
Download Ken's free self care worksheets HERE
Breathing is the first thing we do when we are born, the last thing we do before dying and every moment in between. We breathe every day, but do we know how to do it? Do we know what purpose it serves for us beyond the obvious? Do we know how to get maximum benefit and how breathing can impact our mental health? Franny is a yoga instructor who emphasizes the critical nature of breathwork in her practice. She shares her appreciation of breathwork with Ken in this episode.
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Like grief itself there are a great number of misperceptions about what goes on in a counseling session, what people get out of counseling and how counseling may not be for everyone (even though that’s what others want for them). Ken Barringer speaks about some of what he's learned in his many years as a licensed mental health counselor with a specialty in grief and loss.
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In this episode, you'll hear Antonio Vargas talk about the pivot he made over twenty years ago from computer programming to working with and in nature. There is much to gain mentally and physically from walking into a landscape of plants and flowers whether you created the space or are the beneficiary of a space created by others. Landscapes naturally slow us down, and seem to demand we pay attention to them whether it’s a forest, park, your backyard or one plant on your desk.
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In this episode Ken talks with psychologist and author, Matt Hersh about the growing field of energy psychology. Matt has been practicing for many years using EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques). These techniques are an evidenced based treatment method. The increased use and efficacy in helping people find relief from suffering is growing within the field of mental health. Matt has also recently published a book on Self-Care for helping professionals called the Thriving Therapist.
Enjoy!!!
Follow Ken on Instagram HERE
Download Ken's free self care worksheets HERE
In this episode Ken sits with the Cofounder and CEO of Modern Loss, Rebecca Soffer. They discuss the development of the Global Community that is Modern Loss and how the telling of your story and having it validated is such a pathway to healing. Rebecca blends a warm, caring and a straightforward (at times humorous) approach to moving through grief. They also discuss how she came from a journalism background to speaking internationally on the topic of grief.
Follow Ken on Instagram HERE
Download Ken's free self care worksheets HERE
In this episode Ken and Sabbi talk through taking a compassionate approach in connecting with others and using that same perspective to support oneself. Sabbi has a master’s degree in Traditions in Yoga and Meditation from SOAS, University of London. She continues to be inspired by these traditions and brings this artistry to her yoga and meditation practice. Sabbi is also trained in Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction.
Enjoy!!!
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In this episode Ken talks with Jon Hazilla who is a percussionist and professor at the Berklee College School of Music, department of Percussion and Music Therapy. They discuss how music in general, and percussion instruments in particular, can be highly therapeutic and greatly influence one’s mood. Whether you’re 7 or 70 you can benefit from the beats and rhythms produced by the ancient craft of music.
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In this episode, Ken talks with Ashley Rachel, mindset and business coach and host of Follow Your Light podcast, about how through journaling people can find focus, direction and move towards their next vision of living fully and successfully.
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In this episode, Ken meets with Marci Zeiff, founder of Creating Calm to examine the ancient practices of meditation and shamanism and the role they can play in managing grief, loss and the associated anxieties that come with them.
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In this episode, Ken meets with Kathy Seltzer, an acupuncture care specialist to describe how emotions and feelings can get stored in the body causing physical problems. Acupuncture can free up the body to release these feelings and reduce physical and emotional pain. A practitioner of Chinese medicine for over 25 years, she discusses the beauty and simplicity of the craft. Follow Ken on Instagram by clicking here HERE
Download his free self care worksheets by clicking HERE
In this episode, Ken and Jennifer Wiles, LMHC-DMT, Director of HEARTplay and Camp Erin, Boston talk about looking at situations through the lens of grief and using dance and movement as an expressive art. Follow Ken on Instagram HERE Download his free self care worksheets by clicking HERE
In this episode, Ken interviews Jess Moran and RRCA level 1 certified running coach about the therapeutic benefits of a committed running practice. They discuss how running can aid in the management of intense emotions that often come with grief as well as maintaining sobriety. Follow Ken on Instagram HERE
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