The Practical Enneagram: Recent Episodes
Rezzan Huseyin
Enneagram chats with teachers, coaches, practitioners and other humans doing helpful things with, or related to, the Enneagram. Aspirationally practical. Hosted by Rezzan Huseyin.
I catch up with Enneagram author and trainer, and beautiful Social 3 Ronan Gallagher, who has written a really cool and interesting Enneagram book, Stop Being Your Self. The final interview in the series.
The questions I ask Ronan:
How’s the second book going?
What’s it about?
Who is it written for?
What do you enjoy most about writing?
Anything you don’t enjoy?
Do you think there will be more books?
How do you see your type, type 3, showing up in your process?
Your first book, Stop Being Yourself, is written in a very unique style. Describe that style in your own words?
The book is underpinned by certain psychological understandings. Whose work or teachings were you principally influenced by?
Are the chapters based on real people?
Do they know?
Prior to your career as a corporate trainer and author, what were you doing?
Was there a moment you know you wanted to stop?
Is there anything you miss about practising law?
Do you still swim?
Have you ever neglected your fitness?
What are you grateful for about what comes naturally to you as a Social 3?
Do you have specific practices around the third instinct?
What sort of a child were you?
How did your type gel with the culture you were raised in?
How did it not gel?
What’s one piece of advice for 25-year-old Ronan?
What would you like to ask your future self?
When would you say your spiritual journey began?
Define success from your current vantage point.
Do you ever make yourself cringe?
How do you deal with that?
What do you do when you want to psyche yourself up?
Something you waste money on?
Something you waste time on?
What’s valuable to you?
What’s a question you are currently holding?
What’s something that isn’t in question?
What would you say is your largest fear or concern currently?
What helps you to be yourself?
When do you feel the most yourself?
And the least?
What do you do when you are feeling sad?
Thoughts on therapy?
What is one thing you believe to be true about self-development
What makes you feel confident?
What makes you lose confidence?
Which types tend to populate your work and life?
Any types that don’t tend to enter your life? ('Heavy set Ones'. LOL. Definitely stealing this).
Describe your relationship with social media.
What no longer makes you feel reactive that did before?
What still occasionally makes you feel reactive?
What helps you to slow down?
Favourite style of yoga?
Prefer practising in a studio or alone?
What do you love about training people?
Anything you don’t love?
How has this been for you?
Learn more about Ronan's book and his work at stopbeingyourself.ie
Music by UNIVERSFIELD from Pixabay
The brilliantly creative medical doctor and Enneagram author Saleh Vallender (Sexual 5) indulges me with rapid-fire questions about him and his recent books explaining the neurobiological bases of our Enneagram types and Myers Briggs cognitive functions.
Saleh’s questions:
Where in the world are you at the moment?
Where’s home?
What’s a common reason to travel for you?
How do you generally spend a long-haul flight?
What languages can you speak?
Favourite world cuisine?
What is the first thing you usually do when you wake up?
What’s an important habit for you?
Have you ever run a marathon?
Would you?
How do you relax?
What are you most grateful for about your upbringing?
If there was something you could change about your upbringing, what would it be?
What are you most excited to learn more about right now?
What stops you from learning everything you want to learn?
What did you learn from writing your first book, 72 meditations?
Biggest cause of sleeplessness?
Did you always want to be a medical doctor?
If you weren’t a medical doctor, what do you think you’d be doing?
Aside from the obvious, what’s the most intimate thing you can do with another person?
What is a quality that you notice yourself gravitating towards in others?
Quality in others you find difficult?
What is a quality you like about yourself?
Biggest perceived inadequacy?
When did you last fall out with someone?
Do you think that we need to suffer in order to grow?
Which countries did you visit during your break from medical school?
What was your favourite place to visit and why?
What were you seeking?
Did you find what you were looking for?
Do you ever get lonely?
When do you feel the most alone?
What was the last book you read?
What’s a piece of advice you haven’t managed to forget?
Do you still think you’ll specialise in pain?
Name one thing that science doesn’t yet understand about pain.
Do you think there are correlates between our types and our responses to psychological and physical pain?
Describe your own relationship with pain.
Who inspires you?
When do you feel the most creative?
When do you feel the most depressed?
When did you last feel stressed?
What helps you when you’re feeling stressed?
Who do you turn to for wise counsel?
Describe your writing process
The single most important thing you have done for your development?
What is something that you want the Enneagram field to understand?
What is something you wished the medical field understood?
Do you think that correlations exist between our health issues and our types?
What was or is your hope in publishing your book, The Enneagram, the Myers-Briggs, and the Brain, which includes your book, the “The Neurobiology of the Enneagram?
Do you plan to empirically validate your various hypothesis?
What helps you to stay present?
What is a day well spent?
What makes you angry?
What do you tend to criticise yourself for?
What do you tend to criticise others for?
What do you tend to know about people without them telling you?
What don’t you usually know?
What’s one thing other people find normal that you find weird?
What is one thing that other people find weird that you find normal?
What is one thing that knowing the Enneagram has helped you with?
Who in the field of the Enneagram would you like to interview?
What are you working on to do with the Enneagram right now?
What will you likely say to yourself when you listen back?
Saleh's Enneagram books: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Saleh-Vallander/e/B0BKP3GQX8/ref=dp_byline_cont_ebooks_1
The interview he did with Kara on the Blindspot: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/episode-21-the-neurobiology-of-the-enneagram/id1635625250?i=1000590199491
Enneagram teacher, master storyteller and definitely one of the funnest humans in the field Kathryn Grant (Social/Navigating 7) teaches the Enneagram using the metaphor of Homer's Odyssey. Do as I did, and get yourself a mug of something hot and enjoy this snippet from her current online course, Sail the Wine Dark Sea! After some sailing, we take flight and discuss the Wings.
- How Kathryn got into the Enneagram [1.15]
- How she met Michael Goldberg, who wrote about the Odyssey from the Enneagram perspective[4.23]
- We set sail [13.05]
- We leave you on the island of 7 to talk about Wings [36.53]
- The theory of the Wings originally from Ichazo [37.33]
- How do the Wings help with personal growth? [43.37]
- How does the Enneagram stay alive for Kathryn, and is it still useful for her personal development? [50.45]
References, Michael Goldberg's book, Travels with Odysseus: https://amzn.to/422irbw
Kathryn's website: https://www.enneaquest.org/
The Workshop: https://www.enneaquest.org/event-details/sail-the-wine-dark-sea-2023-04-08-08-30
As many questions as I can ask inspiring and hilarious Integral Master Coach, Speaker, Writer and Entrepreneur Chela Davison (Sexual 7) in 19 minutes.
What was the last fight you had with your husband about?
What are you most excited about in life right now?
What’s the biggest challenge you currently face?
What’s an important habit for you?
And your biggest vice?
How would you describe your home in three words?
When is the best time to ask you for a favour?
And the worst time?
What is the Sevenist thing about you?
And the least?
If you weren’t your type, clearly the best, which type would you be and why?
Most used app?
Most used word?
Do you see yourself going back on social media?
What is a book or author you recommend to all creatives?
A book or author you recommend to all coaches?
What does writing mean to you?
If you were to pen a memoir, what would the title be?
If you were to write a self-help book, what would the title be?
How old were you when you completed the Landmark Forum?
What would you say that it developed in you?
Would you do it now?
How many silent meditation retreats have you done?
How does self-care look to you?
If you weren't an entrepreneur and master coach, what would you be?
If you were to write yourself a Dear Chela, what would the subject be?
What is your greatest asset?
And weakness?
Who do you wish understood the value of self-development?
What age were you when you started your first business?
What was that business?
How did it end?
What is your primary spiritual path or practice?
How do you quieten your mind?
What was the last thing you sought to develop in yourself?
What’s a quality you value in others?
What’s a quality you value in yourself?
Last time you fell in love?
Last time you cried?
Tell me one key lesson from the previous 12 months.
What is something that the pandemic highlighted for you?
Describe last year in three words?
What would you love to be able to say about this year at the end of it?
Who would you love to interview for your podcast, What is Leadership?
What is leadership?!
What’s easy for you that used to be challenging?
What’s challenging for you that used to be easy or fun?
Something you do now that you don’t want to be doing in ten years?
Most coached Enneagram type.
Most coached instinct type?
Funnest way to spend an empty weekend?
What is something that you prefer doing alone?
Who has inspired you lately?
Any pet peeves?
How do you say no to people you like?
Biggest accomplishment so far?
If you were not living on the Unceded Territory of the Squamish Nation, where would you be living?
What’s your favourite holiday?
Somewhere you haven’t been that you’ve always wanted to go?
Something you always travel with?
One piece of advice for skiing in a wedding dress?
Favourite workout?
What do you listen to when you work out?
Most eaten snack?
Most used metaphor in your coaching programmes?
The standard approach to resistance?
What is your most given practice?
What is one thing that running LEAD has taught you?
Something that has surprised you about parenting?
Something that has surprised you about marriage?
Truthfully, what are your thoughts on my questions?
How will you reflect on this interview, if at all?
Music by MondayHopes from Pixabay
Find Chela's shiz:
Chela’s Youtube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@cheladavison7822
Her website where you can learn more about her coaching programme, LEAD and her podcast, What is Leadership?: https://cheladavison.com/
Enneagram Academy Singapore Founder, Enneagram trainer, and Dating and Relationship Coach Cindy Leong (Sexual 3) makes love happen. She's also a disarming and tender-hearted human being. Here's an insight into her work.
- How Cindy learned the Enneagram (with Mr Naranjo himself) [1.23]
- Why Cindy chose to specialise in Enneagram and relationships [2.30]
- Cindy's type and instinct type [3.13]
- How the Asian culture feels about the terminology 'sexual' instinct and the dominance of self-pres in Singapore society [7.30]
- Cindy's research on why eligible individuals find it hard to fall in love in Singapore [11.48]
- Cindy's melding of Gary Chapman's Love Languages and the Enneagram instincts [14.22]
- How is the Enneagram best used as a single person on the hunt? [18.03]
- Cindy's three levels of relationship-building: synergy, conflict, flourishing [18.29]
- Are some types better at being single? [22.42]
- Does our Enneagram type influence who we get attracted to? [25.07]
- How does the matchmaking work? [28.18]
- A match-making success story [29.30]
Learn more about Cindy and her work:
https://theenneagramacademy.com
https://relationshipstudio.sg
Music by Gvidon from Pixabay.
Leave the podcast a review or rating to help people find it.
Website: www.thepracticalenneagram.com
Email address: rez@thepracticalenneagram
With Valentine's Day around the corner, let's visit some of the lunacy that happens in relationships. Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, coach, mediator and trainer, the delightful Matt Ahrens (Self-pres 9), shares his insights into each type's attachment issues. Matt disputes a lot of traditional Attachment Theory and says the whole thing with attachment is a lot more nuanced (which the Enneagram can account for). There are in fact three distinct styles for each type. Get in touch with Matt if this sort of thing lights you up.
Instead of episode notes, here is Matt’s organisation of the Enneagram types and attachment styles:
Core attachment strategy, based on the dominant Center (wounded place)
234 - Anxious
567 - Avoidant
891 - Disorganised - simultaneous co-arising of both
Adaptive style, based on Hornevian groups (the non-wounded place)
126 - Anxious
378 - Disorganised
459 - Avoidant
Subtype layer
SP - Warm (Anxious)
SX - Hot (Disorganised)
SO - Cool (Avoidant)
To summarise:
Type 9 - Disorganised/Avoidant + subtype
Type 1 - Disorganised/Anxious + subtype
Type 2 - Anxious/ Anxious + subtype
Type 3 - Anxious/Disorganised + subtype
Type 4 - Anxious/Avoidant + subtype
Type 5 - Avoidant/Avoidant +subtype
Type 6 - Avoidant/Anxious + subtype
Type 7 - Avoidant/Disorganised + subtype
Type 8 - Disorganised/Disorganised +subtype
Find Matt
https://www.linkedin.com/in/mattahrens
https://themattahrensgroup.com/
Music by Roman Senyk from Pixabay
Please leave the podcast a review or rating to help people find it!
If you have something to teach me about the Enneagram, please get in touch.
Website: www.thepracticalenneagram.com
Email address: rez@thepracticalenneagram
It was my joy to talk with Enneagram Godmother, Suzanne Stabile (Social 2) about her latest book, Journey to Wholeness, which along with Suzanne's unique teachings on the link between our types and stress/self-care, outlines a clear approach to balancing the Centers of Intelligence.
- Did the pandemic have anything to do with this book? [2.38]
- Is this book an evolution from the previous book, the Path Between Us? [07.11]
- How Suzanne approaches the issue of mistyping [10.38]
- The basis for the book's theory regarding accessing the high side of Stress number as a way to self-care, and the 'acting out' that happens in the Security number [13.41]
- Demo of the theory using Types 2 and 4 [19.04]
- Should we manage the dominant Center before practising using the repressed Center [20.52]?
- Why managing the dominant Center needs to be the first focus [21.25]
- Suzanne on bringing up her repressed Center, thinking [24.40]
- Why doesn't Suzanne talk about the instincts in her book? [26.25]
- How the dominant instinct/subtype changes [29.16]
- Suzanne on her love for reading and how it supports her repressed Center [32.17]
- Suzanne's next move: moral injury [35.19]
Suzanne's very practical new Enneagram book: The Journey Toward Wholeness: Enneagram Wisdom for Stress, Balance, and Transformation: https://amzn.to/3w0HUn7
References:
Maurice Nicoll- the neurologist, psychiatrist and Fourth Way teacher who named the Centers: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maurice_Nicoll
Find Suzanne:
Life in the Trinity Ministry: https://www.lifeinthetrinityministry.com
https://suzannestabile.com
Music by Reverie-Now from Pixabay
Please leave the podcast a review or rating to help people find it!
If you have something to teach me about the Enneagram, please get in touch.
Website: www.thepracticalenneagram.com
Email address: rez@thepracticalenneagram
Dr Sterlin Mosley (Sexual 4) and Aaron Addonizio (Self-preservation 6), of Enneagram coaching and certification company, Empathy Architects, stop by to enlighten and frighten me about narcissism, and I loved it. Bye-bye Neglectful Narcissists, I'm onto you now. If you don't listen to Sterlin and Aaron's Enneagram podcast, Do You Know You? , you really should. Sterlin's book is called The Narcissist in You and Everyone Else: Recognizing the 27 Types of Narcissism.
- The story behind the name, Empathy Architects [3.03]
- Was Sterlin always going to write an Enneagram book? [4.42]
- What does Sterlin's book do? [8.22]
- What's the relationship between empathy and narcissism? [12.50]
- Is narcissism always negative? [16.08]
- Sterlin encourages me that all types wear rose-tinted glasses when it comes to people they like, it isn't just me being a mug [20.20]
- Does narcissism exist at all levels of health using the Riso/Hudson model? [23.40]
- The distinction between having narcissistic traits and having full-blown Narcissistic Personality Disorder [25.17]
- Is narcissism more common with sexual subtypes? [30.00]
- What will surprise people the most about this book? [35.46]
- An example from the book: Self-preservation 9's narcissism [40.57]
- Another example: Social 7's narcissism [46.12]
- Advice if we read Sterlin's book and realise we are massive narcissists [50.08]
Order Sterlin's book:
Sterlin’s book: The Narcissist in You and Everyone Else: Recognizing the 27 Types of Narcissism https://amzn.to/3tpL3eF
The episode that Aaron cites is:
A Little Bit Culty: https://alittlebitculty.com/
Episode: “John Atak: Make Me a God"
At 37:03 John is discussing the work of Erich Fromm in the Heart of Man from 1965 in reference to narcissism.
Find Sterlin and Aaron:
Website: https://empathyarchitects.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/empathyarchitects/
Music by Nicsa from Pixabay
Please leave the podcast a review or rating to help people find it!
If you have something to teach me about the Enneagram, please get in touch.
Website: https://thepracticalenneagram.com/
Email address: rez@thepracticalenneagram
Coach of coaches, psychotherapist, dream interpreter, and spiritual healer, Amy Ream (Social 6), wakes up very early on a Saturday to share with me a little about the way she works with the Enneagram.
- Where Amy lives and what she does [2.37]
- First encounters with the Enneagram [3.21]
- What distinguishes a coaching client from a therapeutic client from a spiritual client? [8.10]
- How exactly does Amy use the Enneagram in coaching? [9.35]
- Thoughts on Tritype [15.04]
- What other tools does Amy use, in addition to the Enneagram [17.20]
- What is a difficult client and how does Amy deal with them? [19.33]
- What is spiritual leadership and why is it important? [23.00]
- What is a good amount of self-disclosure in a coaching/client relationship? [25.14]
- Amy's spiritual orientation [27.24]
- What's Amy's personal edge? [32.10]
- A retreat that Amy recently led [33.42]
Amy's website: www.amyream.com
Book Amy: https://bookme.name/amyream/sessions
Music by TimTaj from Pixabay
Please leave the podcast a review or rating to help people find it!
If you have something to teach me about the Enneagram, please get in touch.
Website: https://thepracticalenneagram.com/
Email address: rez@thepracticalenneagram
Enneagram teacher and Texan, the brilliantly wise, knowledgable and funny Judy Blackwell (Self-preservation 4) offers a glimpse into her powerful work applying Enneagram wisdom to support individuals in recovery from addiction, as well as families of those affected. Judy was recovering from being sick when this interview happened so her voice is not its usual self.
- Judy's background with the Enneagram [1.48]
- Judy's type [3.29]
- The two recovery universes [4.58]
- What brought Judy to recovery [07.37]
- Why is the Enneagram a helpful tool for recovery [10.40]
- Is recovery a spiritual endeavour? [12.11]
- Does Judy teach people the Enneagram early in recovery? [13.15]
- What defines addiction (how does it happen?) [18.32]
- Are some types or instinct types more likely to become addicted? [21.48]
- When does recovery end? [27.40]
- Recommendations/practices for each type in recovery:
- Type 1 [30.33]
- Type 2 [33.33]
- Type 3 [35.37]
- Type 4 [37.36]
- Type 5 [41.26]
- Type 6 [42.50]
- Type 7 [48.00]
- Type 8 [50.09]
- Type 9 [52.52]
- Final thoughts [55.34]
Contact Judy:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/judy-blackwell-59144b16/
Music by Toby Smith from Pixabay
Please leave the podcast a review or rating to help people find it!
If you have something to teach me about the Enneagram, please get in touch.
Website: https://thepracticalenneagram.com/
Email address: rez@thepracticalenneagram
Founder and Owner of Enneagram Next Level, THINK ABOUT IT, and the Enneagram Institute of Denmark, Author, Coach, Trainer, Teacher and Consultant Flemming Christensen (Self-preservation 3), delights me with an interview about his latest book, the Enneagram - Why the Blind Type Matters, outlining a new approach to development using the Enneagram model.
- Flemming's background in how he works with the Enneagram [3.45]
- How Flemming came to the Enneagram [5.11]
- Obnoxious question about Flemming's type, not my standard practice I'll have you know [8.58]
- What Don Riso had Flemming do when he was discovering his type [10.13]
- When did Flemming start using the Enneagram in his work? [11.40]
- Flemming's three-prongued model for change [15.14]
- The books that have gone before now [18.48]
- And the new book [19.27]
- What's a blind type? [21.17]
- Flemming illustrates the model using his life theme (the Big Brother) [24.36]
- What development is this, personality or spiritual? [28.08]
- How do you find out what the blind type is? [32.20]
- Is the blind type the type that annoys you the most in others? [35.23]
- Why do we need to integrate the qualities of one of the other types? [38.08]
- Flemming applies his model to me and my blind type [42.06]
- How has it made a difference to Flemming to integrate his blind type? [48.03]
Buy Flemming's book: https://amzn.to/3GyP6NJ
The course for Enneagram Eygpt
https://courses.enneagramegypt.com/collections/teacher-trainer
Find Flemming
Enneagram next level https://www.enneagramnextlevel.com/
THINK ABOUT IT https://thinkaboutit.dk/
Music: Children's Folksong Three Blind Mice, from Pixabay
Please leave the podcast a review or rating to help people find it!
If you have something to teach me about the Enneagram, please get in touch.
Website: https://thepracticalenneagram.com/
Email address: rez@thepracticalenneagram
Coach, Consultant and Facilitator Kate Zagorskis (Type 9) offers some insights about how each type moves through uncertainty and ambiguity from her decade + helping individuals, organisations and teams to navigate change. This is a rich conversation from someone with a deep well of compassion and understanding for the process of change.
- How Kate got into organisational change [2.14]
- How the field is changing [3.30]
- What does she love about working in the field [4.35]
- How's the Enneagram used in the field of change? [8.00]
- What is VUCA? [9.40]
- Patterns in the way each type move towards and helps us with change, and how they resist it and create problems.
- General triad patterns [12.00]
- Type 9 [14.32]
- Type 1 [18.35]
- Type 2 [22:02]
- Type 3 [24.32]
- Type 4 [29.00]
- Type 5 [32.33]
- Type 6 [34.54]
- Type 7 [37.14]
- Type 8 [40.03]
- What other than type affects our capacity to meet change? [43.38]
- Why does change bring up grief, and is it important to name that? [45.05]
- What is Kate thinking/feeling when someone is suffering? [48.55]
- Nine things that are true about change (these are gorgeous) [51.20]
Kate's 9 Keys to Change
Holding a holistic perspective (9)
Holding the ideals (1)
Making sure people are thought of (2)
Showing us that we can do something with what we have (3)
Allowing us to grieve what we are losing (4)
Seeing the underlying why (5)
Recognising what's important and what's not (good sifters) (6)
Inspire us to see what's possible (7)
A sense of confidence and capacity (8)
Exercise
Identify what the change is creating
What is not changing?
What we have to destroy and let go of?
An article related to this content is available here: https://thenewnewwork.com/blog/changechaostheenneagram
Find Kate
https://thenewnewwork.com/
Contact https://thenewnewwork.com/connect
Music by Sergei Chetvertnykh from Pixabay
Please leave the podcast a review or rating to help people find it!
If you have something to teach me about the Enneagram, please get in touch.
Website: https://thepracticalenneagram.com/
Email address: rez@thepracticalenneagram
Beautifully compassionate Parent Coach and Enneagram teacher, Valerie Tih (Self-preservation 2) of JoyFULL Coaching celebrates each type's parenting gift, and explains how it looks when they parent more from their fixations. Valerie also offers self-observation practices for each type. One for all parents - and all children of parents. :)
- Early brushes with the Enneagram [2.35]
- What is the Positive Discipline? [4.20]
- What does it mean to parent with presence, from the perspective of the Enneagram? [5.55]
- What is the term Essence Parent? [7.00]
- What are the special capacities of each type of parent, and their blind spots? [8.20]
Find Valerie
Website https://joyfullcoaching.ca/
Facebook https://www.facebook.com/JoyfullCoaching
Instagram https://www.instagram.com/joyfullcoaching/
Music: Music by Zakhar Valaha from Pixabay
Please leave the podcast a review or rating to help people find it!
If you have something to teach me about the Enneagram, please get in touch.
Website: https://thepracticalenneagram.com/
Email address: rez@thepracticalenneagram
The rather delightful Nataliia Bolshakova (SP6), President and Co-founder of Enneagram Egypt, uses her experience in education, pedagogy, and psychology to teach the Enneagram to teens and pre-teens. Here she shares a little about Enneagram Egypt's programmes for teens, teachers and schools, and answers a few of my curiosities about how to talk to teenagers about the Enneagram.
- How did Nataliia get into the Enneagram [2.16]
- Nataliia's type and the types of her family [4.00]
- How are the programmes informed by the stages of development? [9.05]
- Do we teach the kids about their type's downsides? [13.22]
- What's the guidance for teachers wanting to use the Enneagram? [15.50]
- What does each triad need? [19.18]
- How do you avoid beating yourself up as a parent making new discoveries about a child's type? [23.05]
Find Enneagram Eygpt:
Enneagram Eygpt: https://enneagramegypt.com/
Here is the WhatsApp group invite, if you want to be alerted about the next teen programme:
https://chat.whatsapp.com/FqVzWYb3oHs9Mz6dWLd3V5
Music from Pixabay
If you are enjoying the podcast, I'd love it if you left a rating/review.
If you have something about the Enneagram to teach me, get in touch: rez@thepracticalenneagram.com
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
Website http://www.thepracticalenneagram.com
Youtube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCCo409rEWvXyM6pujZsNHtg
Enneagram teacher, coach, consultant and entrepreneur Steph Barron Hall (Sexual Three) shares how she combines her depth study of Communication with the Enneagram in the training that she delivers in teams. I find Steph a compassionate and highly effective/practical teacher of the Enneagram. The communication practices she offers at the end are excellent.
- How the Enneagram became central to Steph's work [1.36]
- Early Enneagram encounters and typing journey [3.36]
- Something tedious about being a Three [7.49]
- Why Steph decided to study Communication in depth [9.55]
- How does typing work when teaching the Enneagram to teams? [11.45]
- What does it mean to communicate well? [17.06]
- Cultural considerations with communication habits [20.16]
- Why does our Enneagram type influence how we communicate? [22.07]
- The difference between low and high context communication [24.45]
- Dominant instinct patterns with content and style of communication [27.21]
- Patterns with Heart, Head and Gut Center types [28.11]
- Should we adapt our communication when we know we are speaking with particular types? [29.52]
- Specific practices for each type, starting with type Eight [32.10]
References
The episode of Enneagram 2.0 I referred to: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/s2-ep01-communications-patterns-and-the-nine-types/id1499745500?i=1000575026808
Find Steph
Website: https://ninetypes.co/
Online course: https://www.enneagramirl.com/
Podcast: https://www.askanenneagramcoach.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ninetypesco/
Music from Pixabay
If you are enjoying the podcast, I'd love it if you left a rating/review.
If you have something about the Enneagram to teach me, get in touch: rez@thepracticalenneagram.com
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
Website http://www.thepracticalenneagram.com
Youtube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCCo409rEWvXyM6pujZsNHtg
Possibly everything you've ever wanted to know about Diamond Inquiry but didn't want to ask. The very encouraging Diamond Approach teacher, Dominic Liber, has a special knack for teaching the mechanics of the central practice of the Diamond Approach. Do yourself a favour and read his book, Diving in the Inner Ocean - an Introduction to Personal Transformation using Diamond Inquiry. Dominic kindly took a break from writing his next book to answer some of my questions about this transformational practice that partners perfectly with the Enneagram.
- Why Dominic decided to write this book [6.45]
- Did Hameed invent Inquiry? [9.55]
- How is this different from self-observation? [14.37]
- Why is knowing the Enneagram useful when it comes to practising Inquiry [18.38]
- Stages of what we can notice in Inquiry [25.35]
- A common mistake that happens when we start to Inquire [27.27]
- How does practising Inquiry feel? [30.28]
- Why do we do this again? [34.46]
- We demo Inquiry [35.35]
- Is there anything we shouldn't Inquire into? [41.56]
- Trauma and practising Inquiry [44.43]
- How do we know Inquiry is working? [46.55]
- Do we need a teacher and a group to practice Inquiry? [48.45]
- Come on Dom, what's your Enneagram type? [50.40]
Links
Dominic’s website https://www.domliber.com/
Register for his practical inquiry course: https://www.dive-in.life/inquiry-course/
Buy his book https://www.dive-in.life/book/
Inquiry from the coach's seat: https://www.coachesrising.com/podcast/the-practice-of-inquiry-with-dom-liber/
Music by AntipodeanWriter from Pixabay
If you are enjoying the podcast, I'd love it if you left a rating/review.
If you have something about the Enneagram to teach me, get in touch: rez@thepracticalenneagram.com
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
Website http://www.thepracticalenneagram.com
Youtube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCCo409rEWvXyM6pujZsNHtg
Another absolute beaut of an Enneagram teacher, the amazingly generous and fun Deborah Ooten PhD (Sexual 8, though she doesn't use instinct categorisations in her teachings) shares about why she saw fit to pair Spiral Dynamics with the Enneagram. Deborah’s work has been pioneering in the field. I encourage everyone to have at least an awareness of her research, know about her fantasy self-help series, the Books of Nine, and consider participating in her upcoming course with the Shift Network.
- What is Spiral Dynamics and who uses it? [2.20]
- The three kinds of change that happen to prompt evolution on the Spiral [9.25]
- Why did Deborah begin to teach Spiral Dynamics with the Enneagram? [15.05]
- What Deborah did with a bunch of Enneagram teachers at an IEA conference [20.13]
- How not to be a simplistic a-hole (like me) about the Spiral and the Enneagram [22.33]
- How does someone living in Blue, Orange and Yellow see the Enneagram (you can use this to figure out where you probably are on the Spiral)? [27.35]
- How do Riso and Hudson's Levels sit on the Spiral? [34.34]
- How Deborah found her way to the Fourth Way as a spiritual path [38.36]
Find Deborah:
Deborah's website, www.goconscious.com
Btw:
- Gravian theory is a reference to Clare Graves, https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clare_W._Graves whose work Don Beck and Chris Cowan built their Spiral Dynamics model on.
- Vmeme just means set of values. Values meme.
- 'Developmental allergy' is a fancy term for low development.
- 'We'/collective stages - Blue and Green.
- ' Self-expressive' or Individualistic stages - Red and Orange.
- Link to Deborah's article outlining research: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1C4Hmd3xbVsS7u2fG8KZqPo5R7crNceAj/view?usp=sharing
- Link to Books of Nine: https://n-1games.com/the-books-of-nine.html
- If this topic interests you, you might want to listen to: 'Type, the Spiral and disintegration', with Leslie Hershberger (Episode 7) and 'The types in colour', with Dr Khaled ElSherbini (Episode 14)
Music by SergeQuadrado from Pixabay
If you are enjoying the podcast, I'd love it if you left a rating.
If you have something about the Enneagram to teach me, get in touch: rez@thepracticalenneagram.com
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
- Website
- Youtube
This was an interesting interview to do with a gold standard Enneagram teacher who I have appreciated a lot since I came to study the Enneagram. Peter O’Hanrahan (Social Eight) is known worldwide in the field, especially for his teachings on how our type patterns show up in the body and emotions. Peter came to the Enneagram way back in 1978 as a counsellor and body therapist, so the orientation was always highly practical. He’s been associated with the Narrative Enneagram from the early days and still teaches their programmes.
- Peter on the value of working on the body and the emotions [2.06]
- How he got into embodiment work [3.36]
- What exactly does building body awareness help us to do? [4.40]
- Why does it help us with relationships? [6.21]
- Just how do you get a Nine in touch with their anger (not a part of the scheduled lineup but couldn't resist asking)? [13.20]
- Type tour of the bodily characteristics of each type, starting with type One [17.10]
- Do the instinct types point to specific body armouring? [34.47]
- What gets on Peter's nerves about where the Enneagram is going? [37.40]
- Anything progressive about where the Enneagram is going? [38.58]
- What's getting Peter's attention these days about the Enneagram? [40.27]
Peter's articles on these topics:
Love in the Three Centers https://theenneagramatwork.com/love-in-three-centers
The Embodied Enneagram https://theenneagramatwork.com/the-embodied-enneagram
Conscious Breathing Practices https://theenneagramatwork.com/conscious-breathing-practices
Peter's website, the Enneagram at Work https://theenneagramatwork.com
Music by Mepa_Melson from Pixabay
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
- Website
- Youtube
Email me: rez@thepracticalenneagram.com
Spiritual teachers and corporate high-flyers/creatives, Co-founders of Upbuild, Rasanath Das (Social Three) and Hari Prasada Das (Social Four) talk about the Levels of Consciousness, the Riso/Hudson contribution to the Enneagram that Hari and Rasanath have decided to make central to their coaching and training work. The wisdom just flowed in this one. Glad I found such integrous teachers to cover a huge topic. Gratitude to Michael Sloyer for setting this up.
- Rasanath's early meetings with the Enneagram [3.35] and Hari's [8.02]
- Why they started Upbuild and what Upbuild is about [14.30]
- Rasanath describes the formation of the types [16.19]
- Hari answers the question, 'is type the same thing as ego'? [18.13]
- Hari answers the question 'what exactly are the Levels of Consciousness? [21.29]
- Rasanath answers the question, 'can we actually lose our egos'? [22.51]
- Rasanath describes humility, the telltale quality of self-realized souls [24.55]
- Rasanath describes why the Levels of Consciousness continue to be so revolutionary [28.56]
- Hari on why the Levels was such an important contribution to the Enneagram [30.45]
- Hari on why Upbuild calls the stages Creative, Controlling and Destructive (rather than Healthy, Average and Unhealthy) [33.07]
- Rasanath answers the question 'can we diagnose ourselves accurately on the Levels'?[37.33]
- Rasanath answers the question, 'can we really rise up the Levels through effort alone'? [42.42]
- Hari describes the motto of his German teacher/mentor (one a lot of us have I think!) [46.53]
- Rasanath describes three layers of responsibility and why they are core to rising up the Levels [48.39]
- Hari on how to take responsibility on a practical level [51.27]
- Rasanath on using the Enneagram as a vertical development model in general [53.20]
References
Personality Types: Using the Enneagram for Self-discovery, by Don Riso
Discovering the Enneagram, by Andreas Ebert and Richard Rohr
Find Upbuild
Website: https://www.upbuild.com/
Podcast, Upbuilding the Self: https://www.upbuild.com/podcast
Events: https://www.upbuild.com/events-listed
Music by SergeQuadrado from Pixabay
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
- Website
- Youtube
Email me: rez@thepracticalenneagram.com
Group creative facilitator and fellow Brit (a rare pleasure!) Samantha Taroni (Social Six) shares about how she guides others to access the archetypical energies of the nine types through 9 trees. I experience this as a unique and lovely way to work with type patterns.
- Where Sam hangs out and what she's been up to till now [1.30]
- Sam shares about her practical handbook, Take it to the Trees [5.35]
- What inspired Sam's Deep Mapping [13.02]
- How the process translates to an online format [18.15]
- How Sam plans to expand on her synthesis of the Enneagram and Deep Mapping [20.06]
References
Ogham Tree Calander
Take it to the Trees (www.amazon.co.uk/Take-TREES-Samantha-Taroni-ebook/dp/B09LVDZ2BL)
Find SamWebsite https://www.thesoul-shed.co.uk/
Instagram https://www.instagram.com/the_soul_shed/ and https://www.instagram.com/takeittothetreesproject/
Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/thesoulshed/
**
Music: 'Quirky Moments', Purple Planet Music
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
- Website
- Youtube
Email me: rez@thepracticalenneagram.com
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Enneagram teacher, Michelle Wangler Joy (So4), describes the patterns in how our types get stuck in the challenging second stage of intimate relationships. This is the sort of stuff that you want all couples to know. Michelle's synthesis is the best application of the Enneagram to intimate relationships that I am aware of.
- Michelle's background [1.05]
- What is the Developmental Model of Couples Therapy? [2.53]
- What is Stage 1 of a relationship in the DMCT model and why do we get stuck there? [4.07]
- What is Stage 2 and what happens then? [4.50]
- What is true differentiation? [7.00]
- What is Stage 3 and what happens if a couple skips from Stage 1 to Stage 3? [11.01]
- How does each type get stuck at Stage 2, and how can they successfully differentiate? [12.15]
- Does the instinct type matter with these differentiation practices? [41.23]
- What Michelle's up to [42.34]
A list of the self and other differentiation practices for each type
Eight: Express vulnerabilities (self) and ask partner what feels supportive (other)
Nine: Bring themselves forward (self) and ask questions of partner designed to explore conflict (other)
One: Instead of speaking to a partner like a critical parent, give partner data about them (self) and see partner as different, not wrong (other)
Two: Get in touch with needs and share them with partner (self) and ask partner about their assumptions (other)
Three: Be first and don't rush to problem-solve (self), manage their defensiveness around partner's feedback (other)
Four: When communicating, avoid over-identifying with emotions (self), extend self to partner's reality (other)
Five: Bring themselves forward and keep partner posted (self) and ask questions of partner, and express empathy (other)
Six: Move through doubt and share more (self), ask partner questions and avoid projecting fears onto partner (other)
Seven: Initiate negative conversations (self), and sit with partner in conflict, slow down and seek to understand (other).
Find Michelle
Website, https://couplesandtheenneagram.com/ (download her ebook, it is excellent).
Link to her Couples and the Enneagram Relationship Inventory (CERI) https://couplesandtheenneagram.com/couples-and-the-enneagram-relationship-inventory/
Music: 'Dream Home', Purple Planet Music
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
- Website
- Youtube
Email me: rez@thepracticalenneagram.com
Researcher Dr Frederik Coene (SP6) speaks about his research into sex and human sexuality and the Enneagram. If you can't tell, I adore Frederick and his work. Very helpful stuff. Self-preservation Six gets a lot of attention in this episode, so enjoy that SP6s!
- Frederick's very serious job and what he does in his free time [2.43]
- How he became involved in looking at sex and the Enneagram [3.27]
- Frederick's research with Valerie Wannamaker [4.14]
- What's wrong with the way we're having sex? [7.33]
- The two types of sexual incompatibility [9.00]
- How self-preservation Six does sex [15.20]
- How Six pursues sex for ego-gratification [16.27]
- Sex to the self-preservation instinct [18.05] and insights based on the Zones of self-preservation.
- How Six flirts [28.47]
- How Six behaves in the bedroom [35.32]
- Will there be a book? [43.45]
- Frederick's involvement with the field of sex therapy [44.47]
ReferencesEnneagram Eygpt (https://enneagramegypt.com/)
Dr Frederick Coene's course, the Enneagram and Human Sexuality (https://courses.enneapath.com/)
Music: 'We'll Make it Through', Purple Planet Music
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
- Website
- Youtube
Email me: rez@thepracticalenneagram.com
Artist, author and prolific creator, the very fun Ann Gadd (SO9), shares her insights on creativity, the instincts and the types.
- Ann introduces her creative self [1.05]
- What is creativity? [5.35]
- Ann's inner work explorations and how she found the Enneagram [7.03]
- Does learning the Enneagram help us to understand what creativity is? [8.17]
- What's more important to unleashing creativity, instincts work or work on our type patterns? [10.15]
- What inhibits each type from being at their creative potential [17.09]
- Ann's practices for creativity [23.23]
References
Big Magic by Liz Gilbert (https://www.amazon.co.uk/Big-Magic-Creative-Living-Beyond/dp/1408866730)
Find/connect with Ann
Enneagrams9paths (https://enneagrams9paths.com/)
Music: 'Magical Storytime', Purple Planet Music
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
- Website
- Youtube
Email me: rez@thepracticalenneagram.com
Enneagram custodian in all the ways, Dana Vitorelo (Social Six), shares about her inner and outer work as a Guide for the Enneagram Prison Project. I challenge anyone to listen to this and not fall in love with Enneagram Six (and Enneagram Prison Project for that matter).
- An overview of what Dana does as a Guide [1.27]
- How Dana found her people in the Enneagram ambassadors and then inside [2.20]
- What's unique about these students? [5.50]
- How does being a Six support Dana in her work as a Guide [10.26]
- Blindspots as a type Six in the work [14.12]
- What's a bad day on the job? [19.27]
- What's a good day? [25.41]
- A beautiful perspective on the role of resistance in group work [27.45]
- Dana's relationship with sourcing support and mentors [30.21]
- What makes a good Guide? [34.40]
Learn more about Enneagram Prison Project
Website (https://enneagramprisonproject.org/)
Podcast, hosted by Clay Tumey (https://enneagramprisonproject.org/about-epp/podcast/)
Connect with Dana
LinkedIn (https://www.linkedin.com/in/dana-vitorelo-96908367)
Music: 'Always on a journey', Purple Planet Music
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
- Website
- Youtube
Email me: rez@thepracticalenneagram.com
Entrepreneur, philosopher and theologian (among other things), Dr Mary Filice (SP2), shares with me about her unique integrative programme featuring the Enneagram - her Method of Transformation.
- What Mary gets up to in life and how her Method of Transformation ('MOT') came about [01.30]
- When was Mary's intro to the Enneagram? [2.45]
- When and how Mary encountered Gabor Mate's work [5.12]
- Who is the MOT for and what's its goal? [8.45]
- How specifically is the Enneagram used in the MOT? [12.37]
- Mary shares an early instance from life that she experienced the wound for Type Two [15.15]
- How is the instincts lens used in her method? [16.17]
- What if you can't remember the childhood incident(s)? [18.45]
- More details about the MOT and how coaches can engage with Mary [19.45]
References/resources:
A list of the unconscious childhood messages (from the Wisdom of the Enneagram):
Eight: 'It's not okay to be vulnerable or to trust anyone.'
Nine: 'It's not okay to assert yourself.'
One: 'It's not okay to make mistakes.'
Two: 'It's not okay to have your own needs.'
Three: 'It's not okay to have your own feelings and identity.'
Four: 'It's not okay to be too functional or too happy.'
Five: 'It's not okay to be comfortable in the world.'
Six: 'It's not okay to trust yourself.'
Seven: 'It's not okay to depend on anyone for anything.'
Find Dr Mary
LinkedIn (www.linkedin.com/in/mary-filice-phd-9a49966)
Email Mary (mary@drmaryllc.com)
Music: 'Enterprise', Purple Planet Music
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
- Website
- Youtube
Email me: rez@thepracticalenneagram.com
Brilliant Human Design specialist Robin Winn (SP1) describes the Human Design system and why she's passionate about empowering coaches to bring the system into their client work. She also reads my chart, which was glorious to be honest. Oh, and there aren't specific correlations between Enneagram types and HD types, which shouldn't come as too much a surprise hopefully.
- How Robin uses the Enneagram and Human Design in her work [2.55]
- Robin's early encounters with the Enneagram [5.12]
- What did Human Design add to Robin personally, given all the other spiritual and psychological voyaging? [7.35]
- The five Human Design types [12.50]
- How Human Design came into being [20.55]
- Robin connects me with my chart and how it's linked with type 4 [23.05].
- Is it worthwhile to combine the Human Design and Enneagram? [37.00]
- What happens when we are not in alignment with our Design? [43.40]
- Robin's new book on Profiles, and how coaches can engage with Robin [46.55]
Resources
Link to my Human Design chart: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1X9xx9Ap0c9gKGKJvzSxRHQu6ldaANgLY/view?usp=sharing
Find Robin and her work
Robin's books on Amazon: www.amazon.co.uk/Robin-Winn/e/B07WDDWNV4%3Fref=dbs_a_mng_rwt_scns_share
Contact Robin: robin@clientsandhumandesign.com
Purple Planet Music: 'Breaking Light'
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
- Website
- Youtube
Email me: rez@thepracticalenneagram.com
Angry-young-man-come-guy-whose-been-around-the-Enneagram-a while, Mario Sikora (Social Eight) talks about how he approaches the Enneagram's connecting points in his consulting, teaching and coaching work. This has given me something to smoke, along with my clove cigarettes.
- The origins of the teachings on the Enneagram's connecting points [3.35]
- How does Mario use the connecting points in his work with coaching clients? [7.40]
- Example of Mario's languaging around the connecting points using Type Four as an example [15.47]
- What does Mario think about other languaging, especially more spiritual language? [26.40]
- Is there any benefit to being aware of the positive manifestations of the two strategies? [30.40]
- Should we expect to see movement to our connecting points daily? [32.20]
- How does Mario's central teaching around rewriting our narratives apply to the connecting points? [35.45]
- How would we measure growth purely using the connecting points? [38.50]
- Do we need to know where we are with instincts to use the connecting points for development? [40.55]
- Can we mistake the expression of an instinctual priority with movement to a connection point? [41.40]
- What Mario is focussing on these days [42.47]
References/resources
Awareness practices/self-inquiries
- How do you use your type's Support strategy to reinforce the core strategy? When would your Neglected strategy offer you a resource?
- Name the polarities/tensions between your type and each connecting point. Try to figure out whether you see the extremes of those in your life.
- How do the positive manifestations of the Support and Neglected strategies appear for you? How can you use them more consciously?
- What's your narrative around the three strategies you use/are connected to?
Mario's Support strategies
For striving to be...
Peaceful (Nine), it's Secure (Six)
Perfect (One), it's Unique (Four)
Connected (Two), it's Powerful (Eight)
Outstanding (Three), it's Peaceful (Nine)
Unique (Four), it's Connected (Two)
Detached (Five), it's Excited (Seven)
Secure (Six), it's Outstanding (Three)
Excited (Seven), it's Perfect (One)
Powerful (Eight), it's Detached (Five)
Mario's Neglected strategies
For striving to be...
Peaceful (Nine), it's Oustanding (Three)
Perfect (One), it's Excited (Seven)
Connected (Two), it's Unique (Four)
Outstanding (Three), it's Secure (Six)
Unique (Four), it's Perfect (One)
Detached (Five), it's Powerful (Eight)
Secure (Six), it's Peaceful (Three)
Excited (Seven), it's Detached (Five)
Powerful (Eight), it's Connected (Two)
Other names for Support
Russ Hudson uses Stress and then Missing Piece for the high side.
Dr Beatrice Chestnut and Uranio Paes use Resolution.
Integrative Enneagram Solutions use Stretch.
Other names for NeglectedRuss Hudson uses Integration
Dr Beatrice Chestnut and Uranio Paes use Energising
Integrative Enneagram Solutions use Release.
Sandra Maitri calls this the Heart Point.
Find/contact Mario and Awareness to Action
Mario's website: www.mariosikora.com
Awareness to action website: www.awarenesstoaction.com
Purple Planet Music: 'I will find him'
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
- Website
- Youtube
Email me: rez@thepracticalenneagram.com
Author of the wildly helpful Enneagram book, Aspects of You - an exploration of the centres of intelligence and our instinctual drives, Cicci Lyckow Bäckman (sx8) answers loads of my questions about the Centers of Intelligence. "Her Enneagram schooling is combined with some personal ideas" - and they are pretty great.
- How Cicci came to teach experiential inner growth courses and early encounters with the Enneagram [2.00]
- Why do we want to balance the centers? [6.55]
- What are the qualities of those with home bases in the Gut, Heart and Head Centers [8.45]
- How does (1) presence and (2) asleepness look, in the Gut, Heart and Head? [11.30]
- Is there implicit teaching in the sequencing of the way the Centers are taught? [18.50]
- What's the difference between the Heart Center and the Social (adaptation) instinct [21.50]
- What's the difference between a Center being out of balance and under-developed? [24.25]
- What's the unique work that the 9,3 and 6 ('the primary types') needs to do in terms of balancing their Centers? [28.05]
- Awareness exercise for these complicated primary types [32.50]
- That thing about the 'blind' center being the gift center - how does that look practically? [36.30]
- What Cicci is up to at the moment [40.55]
Find/learn more about Cicci
Website (www.lyckowbackman.se/)
Book (www.amazon.co.uk/Aspects-You-exploration-intelligence-instinctual/dp/9174637975)
Purple Planet Music: Snap
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
- Website
- Youtube
Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Integral coach, Enneagram teacher and amazing piano player to boot, Josh Lavine (social Three), makes a passionate plea for better listening. And because - note to self - this is an Enneagram podcast, we also discuss how listening intersects with the Enneagram model, specifically where it 'arises' in the instincts and centres.
- What Josh does in the world with the Enneagram [1.50]
- Josh's type and his early Enneagram encounters [2.42]
- Why Josh is passionate about listening [4.53]. Shout out to the semi-sung hero of this conversation, Brian, Josh's listening partner.
- Why specifically good listening is so important for healing [6.58]
- Difference between coaching listening and friendship listening [15.31]
- Where does listening arise from in Enneagram terms? [19.38]
- Can studying and learning the Enneagram help us to become better listeners? [26.58]
- Practices for better listening [28.03]
Book references
Let Your Life Speak, Parker Palmer
Healing through the dark emotions, Miriam Greenspan
Being a Brainwise Therapist, Bonnie Badenoch
Find Josh
His website (www.joshlavine.com) where you can download his ebook.
Instagram (@lavinejosh)
Purple Planet Music: Masquerade
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
- Website
- Youtube
Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Psychotherapist, couples counsellor, and Enneagram teacher/practitioner Rosemary Cowan (Social Six) gives me a few much-needed relationship pointers. She also explains what aspects of our type are the most 'alive' when we come into an intimate relationship with someone, and offers glimpses into her counselling room.
- How Rosemary got into the Enneagram [2.55]
- What is love? What is a relationship? What is the point of a relationship? [7.28]
- What's fundamental to a healthy relationship? [15.24]
- What aspects of the Enneagram are most 'involved' in relationships? [22.59]
- How are the Belly, Heart and Mental types different in relationships? [26.44]
- When is couples counselling not effective? [30.13]
- Is it enough for one person to do inner work? [32.55]
References
EnneaFest 2022
The Love Languages
The Four Horseman
About Rosemary
Rosemary's website
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
- Website
- Youtube
Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Music: Purple Planet Music, The Mouse House
Writer, publisher, entrepreneur, and inner work veteran Jason Stern (Sexual Nine), talks with me about essence, personality, and the inner work opportunities he offers in the Fourth Way method. Along with the clarity I found in this conversation, I was touched and inspired by what Jason shared about why he writes.
- Jason's business in the world, and Chronogram magazine's reason for being [2.25]
- What has motivated his seeking [8.52]
- The role of psychological work and the difference between essence and personality work [11.25]
- Jason's intention in/when writing the columns for Chronogram [17.35]
- His thoughts on using a system (i.e. the Enneagram) to map essence [20.40]
- An overview of Gurdjieff's philosophy [25.43]
- The practical work happening during the inner work groups that Jason leads [30.20], along with an example of a practice.
Book reference:
Beezlebub's Tales to His Grandson
Find/learn more about Jason
Jason’s website and inner work opportunities
His book: Learning to be Human
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
- Website
- Youtube
Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Music: Purple Planet Music, Valley of Eden
Multi-disciplinary spiritual teacher, Adi Vajra (sx5), enlightens me about what tantra is and does, and describes his beautiful synthesis of tantra methodology - visualisations and body/energy work - with the Enneagram, including his joining of the Holy Ideas with tantra.
- Adi's story and how he came into contact with the Enneagram through Eli Jackson-Bear [3.00]
- What's a non-dual approach to the Enneagram [5.07]
- Adi's type [6.03]
- What's Adi's spiritual location these days [6.55]
- How Adi uses the Enneagram in his work with people [7.58]
- What is tantra? [10.01]
- Is the Tantric world/experience accessible for all? [14.50]
- Adi's work that joins tantra with the Holy Ideas [17.55]
- Is it important to have an experience of the Holy Idea for our type first? [23.35]
- Are the Holy Ideas mental states/perspectives? [24.24]
- Do we sustain the embodiment of the Holy Ideas? [25.05]
- I ask Adi a question about a reference that A.H. Almaas makes to a tantra practice in his latest book, the Keys to the Enneagram [27.50]
- How do Enneagram Nines get along with tantra? [31.10]
- What about Sixes? [33.20]
- Adi's thoughts on Keys to the Enneagram [34.40]
- How would a person begin with tantra? [38.02]
Adi-related links
- Essential teachings, Adi's podcast
- Insight Timer
- Adi's website, Vajra heart
- Flow Hood river yoga
Books we referred to:
- Fixation to Freedom: the Enneagram of Liberation, Eli Jackson-Bear
- Keys to the Enneagram, A.H. Almaas
- The Spiritual Dimension of the Enneagram, Sandra Maitri
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
- Website
- Youtube
Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Music: Thinking Ahead, Purple Planet Music
Kundalini yoga teacher, Enneagram teacher and goddess of Athens, Lynn Roulo (sx7), describes the support that kundalini breathwork can offer in interrupting our type patterns. Lynn also shares about her book about intimate relationships - an amazing collection of narratives on relationships between each type combo - and her own growth journey.
- Who is Lynn Roulo? [2.29]
- What's Lynn's type and subtype [5.11]
- What is Kundalini yoga and why pair it with the Enneagram? [5.39]
- Is Kundalini yoga and such particularly beneficial for head types? [9.48]
- The theory behind matching kriyas and meditations to certain types [11.16]
- How do we know a kriya has 'worked'? [12.58]
- Do we need to do a kriya for 40 or 90 days? [14.02]
- What's a kriya and what's the science behind a kriya? [16.43]
- Lynn on her book, the Nine Keys [19.31]
- How doing life from sx7 is going [23.46]
- An unsavoury email from a lawyer of an Enneagram organisation [26.14]
- How attention to diet has sourced Lynn's development [28.49]
- Can kundalini help us with instinct-related fears [29.54]
- Accessibility of kundalini [33.32]
Links:
- Lynn's website and Youtube
- Books The Nine Keys: A Guide Book To Unlock Your Relationships Using Kundalini Yoga and the Enneagram andHeadstart for Happiness: A Guide Book Combining Kundalini Yoga and the Enneagram
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
Website
Youtube
Facebook
LinkedIn
Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Music: Feeling good, Purple Planet Music
A practitioner-style interview with Dr Janeshree Govindasamy (T9), a 20+ year medical doctor and healer who offers Retreats into Presence using the Enneagram among other modalities.
- Who is Janeshree? [1.40]
- How she became clear that presence was integral to healing [3.45]
- How she relates to the Enneagram [7.20]
- Janeshree's identification of her type [9.50]
- Is quality of presence similar to 'essence'? [11.30]
- How does the Enneagram help us to become more present? Is there a process? [13.11]
- Beatrice Chestnut and Uranio Paes's levels of awareness model [16.41]
- How did the Retreats into Presence come to be? [18.20]
- Does her group work touch on instinct work? [23.04]
- The limits of studying pathology when it comes to healing [25.05]
- How Janeshree integrates the HeartMath work [28.22]
- Is there a go-to presence practice that Janeshree uses? [31.20]
- How do we embody people? [33.28]
- The reason that the retreats are structured the way they are [35.30]
Contact Janeshree to learn more about the retreats.
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
Website
Youtube
Facebook
LinkedIn
Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Music: New Beginnings, Purple Planet Music
Instincts have been getting much of my attention this past year, which is why I was very happy to get to sit with the exciting John Luckovich (SX4), whose new Enneagram book is just brilliant and illuminating.
- Just a few of my insights from John's book [2.21]
- What prompted John's obsession with instinctual drives [3.25]
- What the Instinctual Approaches are and how John developed them [5.32]
- Can anyone use the Instinctual Approaches? [11.39]
- The Self-preservation Approaches, Grounding, Sensing and Pragmatism [16.24 -23.15]
- The Sexual Approaches, Pursuing, Magnetism, Intensification [24.39-36.46]
- The Social Approaches, Availability, Signalling and Navigating [40.20-50.12]
- Do we combine the Approaches with different behaviours around our blind instinct? [50.57]
- How to use the middle instinct to access the blind spot [55.00]
- Are we always going to be a self-preservation (etc) type? [56.47]
- How do we know when we are integrating the blind instinct? [1.00.05]
- What's next for John? [01.02.19]
A written list of the Instinctual Approaches:
Self-preservation
Grounding: Rooting to one’s center and place of balance through the body.
Sensing: Sensitivity to one’s own state through the senses and signals of the body. Attention is on physical feedback and impressions.
Pragmatism: A through-line of attention orienting to processes and progression. Sensible, pragmatic, and enduring attention.
Sexual
Pursuing: Locking on to what attracts with focused energy and attention. Letting what’s extraneous fall away. “Tunnel vision” on the object of desire.
Magnetism: Displaying oneself, while vacillating between pushing and pulling back attention and energy to create interest, tension, and preoccupation. Provocative display to draw attention, attract some and repel others
Intensification: Amplifying and galvanizing energy and excitation with the aim of dissolving or penetrating boundaries. Bringing a quality of activating urgency that encourages the surrendering of boundaries in self and other.
Social
Availability: Opening personal boundaries to invite and receive others. Attention is fanned outward and open, with easefulness about what enters and leaves our field of attention. Includes being receptive to the inner life of other.
Signalling: Sensing my impact on others and sensing the flow of exchange and conveying feelings and intentions appropriately to the situation with in body language. This is allowing relatedness to impact and express through the body.
Navigating: Sensing the layers, boundaries, and nuances of social environments and circumstances, opening to an “overview” sensibility. This brings texture to social contexts that help in recognizing the mechanics of interpersonal dynamics, knowing one’s place, role, or relationship within them.
More about John:
John's must-read Enneagram book: Instinctual Drives & the Enneagram
John's website.
*Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
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Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Queen of dreams, Denise Grobbelaar (SP9) shares her Jungian-informed view of the Enneagram and a little about how she works with it in private practice.
- What Denise does and how she found the Enneagram [1.55]
- Discovering type and how her practice changed as a result [4.37]
- What is Jungian work? [5.55]
- What are Jungian archetypes? [9.00]
- How does Denise bring the two frameworks together [10.15]
- What process do Jungian analysts use? Is this a marriage of process and content [11.50]
- The various approaches to dreams [14.13]
- What is dream appreciation [15.33]
- The subjective versus objective viewpoint [15.52]
- Dream number 1 [18.22] (a type Five dream)
- Dream number 2 [19.58] (a type Three dream)
- General pointers for working with dreams [24.30]
References:
Denise's online course and website.
*Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
Website
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Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Creator of Tritype, Katherine Faurve (SX8) shares a little about the origins of her research and answers my goofy questions about how to bring Tritype into a psychological/spiritual growth journey with the Enneagram.
- What Katherine found when she started her research [2.05]
- Difference between Oscar Ichazo's Trifix and Katherine's Tritype [06.40]
- Q1: Does Tritype tell us anything about behaviour? [9.22]
- Q2: Is it a case of one type per Center? Are we like (for e.g.) Fours in our Hearts, Nines in our Actions, and Sixes in our Minds? [10.39]
- Q3: Does each Tritype have an essential quality or qualities? [15.15]
- Q4: Is Tritype a distraction from the main work? [18.18]
Useful links:
- Tritype test: https://enneagramtritypetest.com/
- More about Tritype: https://www.katherinefauvre.com/tritype
- Katherine's books where you can learn more about each Tritype archetype and their purposes/blindspots: https://www.katherinefauvre.com/products
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
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Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Enneagram OG Dr. Jerome (Jerry) Wagner (SP5) talks with a very giggly me about the interesting areas of confluence between the Myers Briggs Type Indicator and the Enneagram, and what that may mean for growth and development.
- What is the Myers Briggs? [2.18]
- What is the MBTI used for? [10.05]
- Why is it useful to look at both of the frameworks together? [11.02]
- Is the Myers Briggs a simpler framework? [15.10]
- Does the MBTI have a developmental journey built-in? [16.14]
- Me butchering Personality Hacker's car model [19.40]
- How to use the Enneagram to bring balance to your MBTI - a tour through the types! [21.33]
- Are sensing types even interested in the Enneagram? [30.56]
- Would we use both of these or one or the other? [34.03]
Main references:
- The Wagner Enneagram Personality Style Scales (WEPPs)
- Spectrum training
- Enneagram and MBTI webinar (now passed, but contact organiser to purchase a copy)
- Personality's Hacker's Car model
Jerry's websiteEnneagramspectrum.com
***Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
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Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Shining bastion of Threeness, Dr Drew Moser (SP3), talks with me about his Enneagram of Discernment framework as set out in his brilliant book, the Enneagram of Discernment.
- Drew's early cynical encounters with the Enneagram and how it became core to his work [4.00]
- Why did he write about discernment [7.27]
- What is discernment ('a gift and a practice') [9.08]
- Major barriers to discernment in Drew's framework [13.00]
- The three territories of discernment: vocation (awareness of our type), wisdom (integrate missing stance/center), practice triads (cultivating sacred pause, sacred delay and sacred vision) [17.00]
- What was difficult about writing the book? [27.50]
- The settling statements from the book (what each type seeks but settles for)[29.50]
- The type-specific editions of the book [37.00]
- A preview of the new season of Fathoms! [38.30]
Drew's 9 questions
- Who am I?
- Why am I here?
- Where am I going?
- What am I doing?
- What am I feeling?
- What am I thinking?
- What am I remembering?
- What am I experiencing?
- What am I anticipating?
Learn more about Drew's work:
Buy the book, The Enneagram of Discernment (Amazon link)
Listen to Fathoms, an Enneagram podcast
Drew's coaching training/website, TypeTrail
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
Website
Instagram
Twitter
Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Entrepreneur, author of the Career Within You, and longtime Enneagram teacher and student, Ingrid Stabb (SP7), explains how nobody does a certain thing better than our type - and the sooner that we're aware of that thing, the better for our career fulfillment and collaboration potential.
- How Ingrid started with the Enneagram [1.45]
- How she started to combine the Enneagram with careers [5.53]
- Who is the Career Within You for? [7.53]
- What is the key career strength for each type? [9.43]
- Are other aspects of the Enneagram, i.e. subtype, important for careers? [11.43]
- How a person's Enneagram type affects the expression of their cognitive functions in the Myers Briggs system [13.38]
- What can happen when people don't use their strengths in their careers [18.38]
- How does the Enneagram compare with StrengthsFinder? [24.18]
- How Ingrid actually uses the Enneagram in one on one situations [27.00]
- Does each type have a deal-breaker for their career? [29.30]
- How has 'doing 7' been an asset and a limitation [32.33]
Each type's unique strength
- Making Improvements
- Meeting Needs
- Achieving a Successful Image
- Expressing Individuality
- Acquiring Knowledge
- Managing Risk
- Exploring Possibilities
- Asserting Boundaries
- Maintaining Harmony
Book references:
Do what you areWhat color is your parachute?The Enneagram made easyThe Career Within You (Ingrid's book) The Enneagram of Death
Other:
Peter O'Hanrahan and Rene Rosario are teachers from the Narrative Tradition.
Ingrid's website
Strengths in Numbers
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
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Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
A conversation with the smart, brilliantly imaginative and knowledgeable Tom Condon (SX6).
- How Tom came to the Enneagram [1.45]
- What is NLP? [3.0]
- Enneagram styles as forms of defensiveness [7.41]
- What are some NLP approaches and processes to use in coaching? [10.35]
- Does Tom type people? [14.10]
- What does the Enneagram add to NLP? [16.00]
- Do Enneagram styles use specific meta-programs? [17.25]
- How does the process for change work, in an NLP approach? [23.15]
- Does Tom always use the Enneagram in coaching? [33.22]
- Tom's perspective on the instincts and the subtypes [36.27]
- How has being Sx6 helped Tom in his work? [41.30]
- Some very cool ways of working with Type 6 fear [43.27]
- A tour of the Enneagram types and Tom's ways of working with them [48.20]
References
Neuro-linguistic programming
Meta-program
Tom's website
Thechangeworks.com
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
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Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
A chat with the effervescent Vanessa Fernandez (SX3), about how she crafts her teachings in a way that transmits the growth and healing potential of the Enneagram.
- How Vanessa got involved with participating at the recent IEA conference [1.31]
- How she found the Enneagram [4.27]
- Vanessa on her subtype [9.50]
- How Vanessa's values infuse her work [11.43]
- What is it to be a second-generation Enneagram teacher [15.38]
- More guiding values as she teaches [20.15]
- What can be tricky about teaching the Enneagram in the corporate world [24.20]
- What Vanessa is working on currently in her personal practice [26.11]
References
IEA conference
The Sacred Enneagram: Finding Your Unique Path to Spiritual Growth
About Vanessa
The Enneagram Workshop
Youtube
Instagram
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
Website
Instagram
Twitter
Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Interview with Clinical Psychologist and Founder of Life Centered Therapy, Andrew Hahn (SX4). Andrew describes his Enneagram of Essence process and the energetics of our Enneagram type patterns.
- Andrew's introduction to the Enneagram [2.10]
- What led him to develop his Essence Process [5.00]
- The first time he used the Essence Process on an Enneagram Type One client [8.25]
- Is this a somatic approach to the Enneagram? [10.15]
- In what order do we work to become aware of the energetics of our type patterns - the subtype pattern, the centers' pattern, and the energetics of our core fears? [11.55]
- Energetics of the subtypes [15.10] (sexual - up and out; self-preserving - in and down; social - up and diffuse)
- Energetics of Centers [18.35] (Heart - forward and out; Head - back and in; Belly - up and diffuse).
- How Andy identified core fears for the Belly, Heart and Head types [21.37] (They are 'I have no Heart', 'I have no Head', and 'I have no Body'.)
- A practice for working with the energetics of our type patterns [25.45]
- How to integrate essence work in coaching [29.20]
Recommended reading
Essence and the Enneagram - Rediscovering Who We Really Are - Part I
Essence and the Enneagram: Rediscovering Who We Really Are Part II
Learn more about Andrew's work:
Life Centered Therapy website
The poem I read, Falling into Grace, by Andrew Hahn
What I want to know is
When you fall down
How do you respond?
Do you pretend
You have not fallen?
And if you do
Do you deny the grace
That is your place
When you fall?
Do you experience just how small
You really are?
Or deny the very essence of
That truth
And in that act
Deny yourself
And not tend to your garden?
What I want to know is
When you fall down
How do you respond?
Do you frown
Not knowing that you’ve grown?
Do you groan at the naked pain
And curse the Gods as a refrain?
Or do you refrain
From wallowing in the pain
Experiencing exquisite pain
A labor
Leading
To creative
Birth?
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Music entrepreneur turned Integral Master Coach and Teacher, Steve Beckett (SX5), comes on to talk about teaching, coaching, and doing life from the Five perspective. Steve was my teacher when I went through Integral Coaching Canada's training.
- Steve's journey from music/record label entrepreneur to Integral Coach and Trainer [4.25]
- Steve's first encounter with the Enneagram [8.05]
- How he experiences being a Sexual subtype [9.50]
- Deeper use of the Enneagram [10.57]
- How Steve uses the Enneagram in his personal work [12.50], working with fear [13.35].
- How Fivesness sources Steve in his work and what it closes down [14.54].
- Evolution of Steve's spiritual practices [17.50].
- On the Diamond Approach [20.55].
- How Steve experiences the awakened perspective for Five, Transparency [22.05].
- Most useful practices [24.40].
- Misconceptions about Fives [29.35].
- Integration points and their use in coaching [30.15].
References
Integral Coaching Canada
Diamond Approach
Learn more about Steve at his website, Integral Coaching UK.
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
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Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
The brilliant and fun Dale Rhodes M.S., M.A. (SX4) talks with me about his literature and film groups, and his men's groups. I learned a lot in this conversation, about what it means to teach or speak about the Enneagram in a way that is both effective and healing.
- How Dale came to the Enneagram [2.25]
- His thoughts on the MBTI [7.35]
- How and why Dale started the film and literature groups [10.30]
- Who is the standard student for Dale's groups? [17.40]
- Why look at type through the lens of gender [19.35]
- A Daoist perspective on type [24.00]
- How Dale communicates the instincts material [26.40]
- Why is it important to learn the Enneagram in community? [31.30]
- A movie and a book per type! [37.50] Starting with Type 2.
Learn more about Dale's work at his website, Enneagram Portland.
References:
Judith Searle's book, the Literary Enneagram.
Tom Condon's the Enneagram Movie & Video Guide.
Dale's list of movies and books for each type:
The Connector (Type 2): Cold Comfort Farm/ and Kiss of Spiderwoman
The Performer (Type 3): The Pursuit of Happyness/ and Black Narcissus
The Romantic (Type 4): Departures/ and Hedda Gabler
The Observer (Type 5): Lars and the Real Girl/ and Into the Wild
The Loyal Skeptic (Type 6): Divergent (teen novel Veronica Roth)/ and Flirting with Disaster (film by David O. Roarke)
The Epicure (Type 7): The Mayor of Castro Street/Milk/ and A Raisin in the Sun
The Protector (Type 8): My Ántonia/ and True Grit
The Peacemaker (Type 9): The Stone Diaries/ and Paterson
The Idealist (Type 1): A Man Called Ove/ and Remains of the Day
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
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Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Coach, mentor, and senior faculty at the Deep Coaching Institute, Diana Redmond (SX9), talks to me about her journey and shares a couple of great tips for coaching Enneagram Nines.
- Diana's background [3.05]
- How she encountered the Enneagram and initial response [8.30]
- How Diana found the Diamond Approach work [13.20]
- What it means for coaching Nines that they are formed in the Belly Center [15.40]
- How to teach Nines to get centered in their bellies [19.07]
- How to avoid activating resistance/stubbornness [22.47]
- How to guide Nines to experience their anger [25.10]
- How to support Nines in seeing the Passion, Sloth [27.00]
- How Nines have a distorted sense of time [27.50]
- Diana's views on Object Relations [30.35]
- Do all awakening Nines go through a period of being overtly angry? [34.05]
- How important is a body practice like yoga or aikido for Nines? [34.43]
- Tip for Nines when exercising [36.10]
References
Deep Coaching Institue
Diamond Approach
About Diana
Diana's website.
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
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Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Dr. Khaled ElSherbini (5), Founder of Enneagram Egypt, talks to me about his synthesis/ marriage of Wilber's integral model with the Enneagram. Please excuse the sound quality issues in this, we had some connectivity issues.
- Khaled's background and how he met the Enneagram [2.08]
- Why and how he developed the Integral Enneagram model [3.35]
- How he got the characteristics of each type at each stage (a description of his 9 stage methodology) [7.28]
- Why putting a developmental stages model with the Enneagram is a good idea [22.00]
- How to discern whether someone is expressing aspects of their developmental stage versus their Enneagram type [24.58]
- How to best support clients that are too comfortable at their level, aka, Nines at Green [27.13]
- How an initial client assessment helps you to see where the problems are located (whether an aspect of development or type) [29.00]
- Khaled reminds me (again) that coaching is not about getting the client up to the next developmental level [32.10 and various places.]
- How transparent Khaled is in coaching with developmental maps and the Enneagram [34.05]
References
- Integral theory
- Wilber's developmental model
About Dr Khaled ElSherbini
- Enneagram Egypt website
- The Integral Enneagram program
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
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Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Physical therapist and pioneer of the somatic Enneagram, Marion Gilbert (SX8), talks about why the somatic component to developing and awakening with the Enneagram is so important to address.
- Marion's introduction to the Enneagram [2.52]
- How Marion got involved with the Narrative Enneagram [4.50]
- What is the somatic enneagram? [7.50]
- Somatic nature of type (examples of Type Four and Eight) [8.40]
- Three basic pillars of somatic awareness [13.51] (1) grounded presence, (2) cultivation of inner observer and (3) cultivation of placement of attention.
- Marion's integration of Peter Levine's work in her somatic awareness program [19.48]
- Contracted body center states and how they link to types [21.33] (head types flee, heart types freeze, body types fight).
- The relaxed body center states [24.03] (flight becomes curiosity, freeze reinstates seeking for connection, and fight becomes play).
- Non-dual perspective on integration [26.45]
- Is there any type for whom this work is more important? [28.25]
- Can we work on the somatic line without engaging the psychological enneagram? [29.22]
- How to avoid traumatizing people [30.40]
- How doing Eight has served and not served Marion [32.05]
References:
- 'Frosty' the snowman is a visual of the contracted and expanded states of the mental, emotional, and body centers. It is a visual included in Marion's materials.
- The Narrative Enneagram
Marion Gilbert
Marion's website where you can learn about her Somatic Enneagram Certification Program
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
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The Process Enneagram is the ugly stepsister of the Enneagram! So says Lucille Greeff (SX4), Chartered Organisational Development Practitioner, Facilitator, Coach, Poet and all-around Enneagram wizard. In this interview, Lucille elucidates on all things vertical development and the Enneagram.
- How Lucille met the Enneagram [0.46]
- What is vertical development [5.26]
- What triggers adult development [9.28]
- How has vertical development been contextualized in the Enneagram [11.06]
- What is the Process Enneagram [14.06]
- How to begin to work with this with clients [16.41]
- Developmental priorities at Points 1 and 2 [17.36] on the Process Enneagram, Point 4 [24.56], Point 5 [27.26] and Point 6 [27.41]
- How the Enneagram maps with Spiral Dynamics [32.16]
- What frame of vertical development to hold [34.36]
- How development probably makes you unhappier overall (but at least you'll be seeing reality as it is!) [38.03]
Learn more about Lucille's work at her website, Aephoria
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
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Interview with Enneagram teacher, psychologist, author, artist, and poet, Belinda Gore Ph.D. Belinda (3) has been an important teaching presence in my life for the past 12 months or so. In this conversation, we speak about what object relations is and highlight a couple of key ways of working with object relations patterns.
- What Belinda does in life [1.45]
- What is object relations and where did it come from? [4.30]
- Who paired object relations theory with the Enneagram [6.03]
- Divergences in how object relations is taught [7.36]
- What does object relations add to the picture (why can't we just use the Enneagram to understand relational triggers)? [11.05]
- What is 'repeating questions' from Diamond Approach? [13.40]
- 5 adjectives technique [20.20]
- The whole point of the object relations exploration [21.42]
- Belinda's object relations book [23.12]
- How Belinda feels about threeness [28.53]
- How Belinda sees subtypes [33.14]
Resources/ referencesObject relations patterns:
Attachment types: Nines, threes, sixes
Rejection types: Eights, twos, fives
Frustration types: Ones, fours, sevens
- Belinda's course at the Deep Coaching Institute
- Belinda's article on object relations theory
- How Belinda came to teach Object Relations theory
- The Diamond Approach. Hameed Ali and Karen Johnson, who I refer to, are the founders.
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
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Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
"In working with the Enneagram, well-intentioned coaches are inviting clients to counteract the fixation in a way that generates resistance, which then needs to be overcome in order for the client to develop. Especially when that counteractive move is embodied in a practice." A powerful message from Head Coach and Alethia Founder, Steve March (5), who outlines an evolution in Enneagram-based coaching, which he applies in his coaching methodology, the four depths.
- What happened after Steve graduated from his integral coaching training [4.00]
- The integrating insight he had which led him to develop his coaching methodology [6.00]
- When Steve encountered the Enneagram [9.55]
- Enneagram as a mirror rather than a map [11.15]
- A description of the Alethia method [12.21]
- The beginning of the description of the four depths [13.48] Depth of parts.
- The Enneagram fixation is a constellation of parts [15.37]
- Example of how Steve uses the Enneagram with clients [18.45]
- Depth of process (the second depth) [23.40] and depth of presence (the third depth) [24.55]
- How the Enneagram is used in the process and presence depths [27.00] (it's not)
- Steve's use on wings/lines and typing [31.54]
- Views on vertical development [33.20]
- The fourth depth [33.53]
- The alternative to a self-improvement frame [35.13]
- When Steve teaches the Enneagram in his method [37.30] (he doesn't)
- How coach is a surrogate presence in the beginning of the relationship [40.45]
- Why it's important to work with the Instincts inside of the non-dual depth [45.00]
- Why Steve thinks Alethia is an easier coaching approach [48.23]
Learn more about Alethia here
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
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Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Executive Coach and Facilitator, Renate Landman (SP3), shares how she integrates polarity work with the Enneagram and practical ways to work with this in coaching.
In this episode:
- How Renate became obsessed with polarity [00.46]
- The main polarities in the Enneagram [04.00]
- How Renate introduces this work to her clients [04.40]
- How do we know we are polarised? [06.55] - we feel some sort of strong emotion. "You have to look at where the opposite is" [08.00]
- Is this a cognitive intervention? [09.14]
- Some straight talk [11.42]
- Renate's personal journey as a Type Three [1]
Polarities in the Enneagram:
Ego identification and avoidance (or "me and not me's").
Fixation and Holy Idea (duality in the Head Center).
Passion and Virtue (duality in the Heart Center).
Line point to other Line point.
Between the Wings.
References:
IEQ9 practitioner training
To attend Renate's one monthly Enneagram Community of Practice sessions, email Renate: renate@icon.co.za
Renate's bio on IEQ9 Faculty page
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Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Organizational consultant, coach, and my monthly Saturday Enneagram teacher, Ingrid Hurwitz (SX7), describes the importance of the Inner Observer in Enneagram work with characteristic lucidity.
- What Ingrid gets up to in the world with Enneagram [01.18]
- How she felt when she was first diagnosed as a Sexual Seven [02.27]
- Ingrid's view of the importance of subtype [04.55] and how she discerns subtype of clients [06.17]
- How she moves to Sexual One ('holy rage') [09.10] and Sexual Five [10.30]
- Why Ingrid started working on a Ph.D. on the development of the Inner Observer [11.24]
- Why the capacity for the Inner Observer is needed [12.51]
- Is the Inner Observer the same as the state of mindfulness? [13.55]
- How does a person develop the Inner Observer [18.10]
- Does the Enneagram help us to inhabit the Inner Observer? [20.45]
- How we know we have a developed capacity for the Inner Observer [24.00]
- Practical ways to cultivate the Inner Observer [28.45]
- Ingrid's personal practices [32.50]
- The distinction between non-attachment and detachment [35.30]
- Ingrid's type-specific programs, Into the Wounded Heart [40.35]
References:To attend Community Practice Sessions, email Renate Landman at: renate@icon.co.za
IEQ9
RHETI
Sam Harris's meditations
Evagrius Ponticus
About Ingrid:
Ingrid's website
To learn more about her workshops, email Ingrid at ingrid@takdir.co.za
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
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Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Enneagram master teacher and Integralist Enneagram Hershberger allows me to pick her brain about how the Enneagram maps with the Spiral Dynamics model. Does our type mean that we stall at certain developmental stages? How do we support ourselves through difficult transitions, especially when our type patterns are screaming?
- Does our type stop us from moving on the Spiral? [01.15]
- How to support clients who are in disintegration [05.23]
- Inner and outer resources [10.15]
Resources:
- The interview I was referring to COVID-19 Through the Lens of the Enneagram
- Overview of Developmental Stages of Consciousness
- Kegan's book, In Over Our Heads
- Four Quadrants
- Cynthia Bourgeault's book, The Wisdom Way of Knowing
- Gurdjieff's quote was "it's not just difficult to do the work alone, it's impossible."
Links:
Learn about Leslie's work at her website.
Leslie's new online course, the Centers Approach.
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
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Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
20 years + Enneagram consultant, master teacher, coach, spiritual guide, facilitator, mentor, and generous soul Leslie Hershberger (SO7) shares how she came to her distinct teaching around the 3 Centers.
- How Leslie developed her Centers Approach [1.38]
- An important distinction about 'Feelings' in her approach [3.25]
- Importance of three Center presence in a personal and spiritual transformation path [9.12]
- How Leslie's personal practices have evolved ("In the beginning, it was like I have to be like Ken Wilber") [13.42]
- A reassuringly real-life example [16.40]
References:
The original teaching on Buried Functions:
- Types 4,5 & 9 bury Doing
- Types 3, 7 & 8 bury Feeling
- Types 1, 2 & 6 bury Perceiving
Leslie's teaching:
- Heart types (2,3 & 4) bury Feeling (lead with Doing, supported by Perceiving)
- Head types (5,6 & 7) bury Doing (lead with Perceiving supported by Feeling)
- Body types (8,9&1) bury Perceiving (lead with Feeling, supported by Doing)
Her definitions:
- Feeling - felt sense, sensations
- Doing - action that is emotion/sentiment fueled, constructed, fabricated (Heart types); action taking (Head types)
- Perceiving - thinking
Links:
Learn about Leslie's work at her website.
Leslie's new online course, the Centers Approach.
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
Website
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Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Part 2. Business consultant, coach, teacher, and trainer of trainers, Ginger Lapid-Bogda, offers 'watch-fors' for each Enneagram type when teaching the Enneagram, along with some very sage advice for those of us called to teach.
- Type patterns when teaching [01.10]: Ones - over-preparing; Twos - reliance on facilitating when they need to be designing something for others to do, and avoidance of mini-lectures; Threes - getting past the performance; Fours - discrediting self before they begin; Fives - not being relaxed enough, being cerebral and stoical; Sixes - excessive doubt; Sevens - keeping training upbeat when that doesn't serve; Eights - expecting group to come to them; Nines - failing to emphasize what's important and what's not.
- Teaching to all three Centers [06.00].
- Teaching from all three Centers [07.00].
- Advice to those called to teach [09.44]: "Who is the call from? Is it your ego?"
Ginger's website, Enneagram in Business
Ginger's Facebook page
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
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Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Part 1 of a 2 part series with business consultant, coach, trainer (just don't call her 'guru'), Ginger Lapid-Bogda ((SO2) - an Enneagram teacher who will always hold a special place in my heart. In Part 1, we mostly discuss what's so great about using metaphor to teach.
In Part 2 (released on 16/3) she offers some 'watch-fors' for each Enneagram type when they teach, and priceless advice for those of us called to teach the Enneagram.
In this episode:
- How Ginger's passion for travel got ruined [1.43]
- Ginger getting told off about her Enneagram app [5.35]
- How Ginger became an educator and developed compassion for the learning experience [7.00]
- Who inspired Ginger as a teacher [11.00]
- How she got into the Enneagram ("it was very random" and involved organic food) [11.50]
- How Ginger thinks of and teaches the Enneagram [12.20]
- Influence of her Gestalt therapy background [14.20]
- I go fangirl on Ginger's latest book, the Art of the Enneagram [15.40]
- I miscount the number of metaphors in Ginger's book [16.50]
- Importance of metaphor in teaching the Enneagram [19.00]
- Ginger asks me a question [20.05]
- Her favorite metaphor in the book [21.20]
- A caution when developing metaphors [23.05]
References:
- Ginger's book, the Art of the Enneagram
- The Enneagram in Business Learning Portal
- Ginger's website, Enneagram in Business
- Ginger's Facebook page
- 3 different learning styles:
- Auditory learners take in information through listening and speaking.
- Visual learners best absorb information when they see the material being presented.
- Tactile, or kinesthetic, learners learn 'hands-on' and prefer firsthand experience with practical applications.
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
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Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Executive Life Coach and Integrative Enneagram Solutions Faculty Member, Marianna Meyer [6], shares how she uses the IEQ9 test in her coaching practice.
In this episode:
- How Marianna met the Enneagram [2.56] and what she thinks the Enneagram does [3.44]
- How she started working with Integrative Enneagram Solutions [4.58]
- How "a test takes away coach bias" [7.15] and how Marianna still gets type wrong when not using a test [8.35]
- The Integrative approach to Enneagram development [09.27]. Core type, Subtype, then Centers of Expression
- How to work with the various Centers data [11.42]
- Working with Triadic styles, or Center-specific styles [13.57]
- I ask an extremely finicky question [14.51]
- Marianna explains how she works in real life, with all the complexity [16.53]. "Less is more; I like to distill things to the most salient."
- How she works with the bars/percentages [17.25]
- Integrative's approach to Lines: 'Stretch and Release' [21.22]
- How Marianna works with Stretch and Release in practice [22.10]
- How she works with the least accessed point in the profile (Jerry Wagner's idea). "It's the least practiced muscle; it holds a lot of power". Gives example of Enneagram Nine usually having low scores for styles Eight and Three [23.00]
- Other concepts from IEQ9's Coaching Companion: Stress and Strain, and Reality Distortion [25.50]
- Advice for self-motivated self-developers! [27.49]
References:
- 'Depth-psychology' https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Depth_psychology
- 'Harmonics' http://www.fitzel.ca/enneagram/harmonics.html
- The Handbook I refer to is one that you get when you do the IEQ9 training; it isn't available on Amazon.
Links:
- IEQ9 Questionnaire: www.integrative9.com/ieq9products/ieq9-questionnaire/
- Learn more about Marianna: www.mariannameyer.com
- Learn more about Rez: www.thepracticalenneagram.com
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
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Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Music: New Beginnings, Purple Planet Music
Outtake from Episode 1. Borrowing a feature from Enneagram 2.0 (Beatrice and Uranio's podcast), I ask Beatrice and Uranio to name their 'top 5' hallmarks of an effective typing interview and (almost) regret it.
Beatrice's top 5:
5. Ask good questions, and then actually listen to the answers.
4. Be really aware of your own biases. Beatrice discloses her hilarious self-preservation four bias.
3. Ask good questions and know what questions don’t help you. For example, don’t ask people 'how loyal are you' to get at 6ness. Everyone says they're loyal!
2. Combine humility with experience. Do a lot of practice.
1. Know the Subtypes. Otherwise, you’ll miss the social 7, or the self-preservation 3, etc.
Uranio's top 5:
5. Practice being present and receptive and train yourself to get rid of confirmation bias.
4. Don’t ask rubbish questions. (I've paraphrased).
3. Embrace the Enneagram's complexity. Also, remember that some interviewees might not trust you.
2. Humility.
1. Study hard - like Rez - and do lots of typing interviews.
Dr Beatrice Chestnut (SP2) and Uranio Paes (SO5) explain the principles of effective typing.
- Beatrice and Uranio describe how they learned to type through coaching, teaching and supervising the Narrative Enneagram’s typing method [5.00]
- How and why they built their own tool: the interview script and the flowchart [8.00]
- I paraphrase their 9 typing commandments [13.00]
- We discuss obstacles and gifts of Heart Center, Head Center and Body Center coaches, when typing others [24.00]
- We discuss how to operate from three Centers when we type. Beatrice talks about how typing interviews are a good practice of 'three Centers presence' of themselves [32.00]
- Beatrice and Uranio explain why they decided to put some energy into developing a new test that utilizes adaptive technology [38.00]
- Additional effective typing tips [44.00]
Learn more about Beatrice and Uranio's work: www.cpenneagram.com/
Stay connected to the Practical Enneagram:
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Email me: rezzan@artofwellbeing.com
Music 'All Together Now' by Purple Planet Music