Be Inspired: Recent Episodes
Chander Shankar
Daily messages and inspiring thoughts that help resolve your conflicts, find motivation, build confidence, accomplish goals and achieve personal growth.
In this episode of 'Be Inspired,' Chander Shankar explores how life parallels a game of cricket, with each of us being the batsman facing a hat-trick ball. Framing life's problems as fielders and challenges as cricket balls, Chander delves into the power of mindset and beliefs in hitting the 'perfect shots' in life. Using real-life examples, from dealing with a boring job to tackling issues like being overweight, the episode underscores the importance of focusing on solutions rather than problems. Chander offers three practical tips to navigate life's curveballs: reflecting on life before the problem, considering alternative actions, and focusing on immediate steps for improvement. The episode encourages listeners to 'bat through challenges' and choose to move forward, no matter the obstacles.
In today's episode of "Be Inspired," we tackle the all-too-common issue of a cluttered mind. Learn simple yet effective ways to declutter your thoughts, prioritize your tasks, and create space for creativity and peace. Tune in for your daily dose of motivation to keep your mind clear and your spirits high. Life gets busy, but your mind doesn't have to be.
Ever felt trapped by labels like 'introvert,' 'slow learner,' or even 'follower'? In today's episode of 'Be Inspired,' we tackle the power of self-definition. Discover how to shake off old labels, take control of your own story, and redefine your true self. With actionable tips on challenging stereotypes, believing in your own potential, and taking the lead in your life, this episode is a must-listen for anyone looking to break free from limiting beliefs and step into their authentic selves.
Today on 'Be Inspired,' Chander Shankar unpacks the multifaceted concept of success and why your personal definition matters. Get actionable tips on how to prepare for success, from observing others to consistent practice and feedback. Whether you're chasing financial milestones or seeking inner fulfilment, tune in for strategies that will pave your way. Elevate your day, every day, with just two minutes of daily inspiration.
Join us in today's 2-minute episode of 'Be Inspired' as Chander Shankar explores the life-changing potential of the words 'Yes' and 'No.' Learn how safeguarding these commitments can be your secret formula for success. Get quick tips on how to use these powerful words wisely to shape your destiny. Tune in and elevate your day, every day!
In today's 2-minute boost, NLP Life Coach Chander Shankar delves into the infectious power of emotions and how they ripple through our lives. Discover actionable strategies to gain control over your emotional state, from self-awareness to seeking trusted feedback and mindful distraction. Learn why mastering your emotions is a key factor in achieving long-term success. Your emotions are energy in motion; learn to steer them towards your goals.
Join NLP life coach Chander Shankar in episode 69 as he dives into the world of growth and complexity. Discover how facing complex challenges can actually lead to personal growth and creative thinking. Learn the power of seeking help from others and thinking outside the box to find opportunities you might have missed. Embrace the complexity around you, break it down, and watch yourself flourish. Tune in for your daily dose of motivation!
Welcome to another motivating episode with Chander Shankar, your NLP life coach. In this podcast, we dive into the importance of perseverance. It's easy to blame external factors for our challenges, but the truth is, that we all have incredible potential within us. By shifting our mindset from victimhood to victor mentality, we can influence our outcomes positively. Think of it like breaking a rock with a hammer – it's the cumulative effort that leads to success. Chander shares three practical steps: setting clear goals, maintaining a positive mindset, and persistent effort. Tune in to discover how embracing perseverance can lead to a brighter future.
Link to my latest book: Unlocking Your Inner Strength
🇦🇺 Australia: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B0CD138M2F (Print version available)
🇺🇸 USA: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CD138M2F (Print version available)
🇬🇧 UK: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0CD138M2F (Print version available)
🇮🇳 India: https://www.amazon.in/dp/B0CD138M2F
Join NLP life coach Chander Shankar in this uplifting episode as he explores the common question, "When should I start or am I too late?" Discover the truth about timing and learn valuable insights on how to take the first steps towards change, even if you're feeling unprepared. From practising gratitude to embracing mindfulness, Chander provides simple and actionable tips for listeners of all ages. Remember, the best time to begin is now – and your present actions will shape your future. Tune in for a quick burst of motivation!
Join Chander Shankar, your NLP life coach, in this insightful episode as he guides you through the art of transforming stress and pressure into stepping stones for success. In a world where performance pressures are ever-present, Chander delves into effective strategies for handling workloads and converting stress into positive outcomes.
Discover how stress is a response to external pressures and how our mindset seeks control over outcomes. Chander emphasizes the importance of recognizing emotions and accepting that certain factors are beyond our control. To navigate stress, he introduces a four-step approach:
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- Discover: Identify the sources of stress and label your emotions. Acknowledging pressure is half the battle.
- Prioritize: Take a breather and step away for clarity. Prioritizing well-being brings calmness and fresh perspectives.
- Co-create and Focus: Respond to pressure by examining facts and your potential actions. Your reaction to the situation is crucial.
- Sustain: Embed these changes for long-term success. Repetition is key; make effective strategies a part of your routine.
Chander concludes by advising gratitude, reflection, and intentional thinking. Remember, confidence is an intrinsic energy. Embrace pressure as a catalyst for growth, and journey towards your ladder of success with Chander Shankar's encouraging words as your guide.
Tune in to this episode and turn pressure into your power!
Join Chander Shankar, your NLP life coach, for a quick shot of motivation in today's 2-minute episode. The focus is on the impact of ambiguity in conversations and its connection to our confidence.
We all see the world uniquely, leading us to assumptions, conclusions, and opinions. While flexible thinking is valuable, it's crucial not to rush into solutions when offering help. Often, our perception takes the lead unconsciously.
Understanding that ambiguity hampers relationship progress, Chander proposes a shift toward clarity. Rather than making assumptions, strive to provide it. For instance, when a friend expresses job frustration, try probing questions like "What does that mean?" and "What would good look like?"
Recognize the urge to fill gaps in conversations; instead, opt for clarifying inquiries and embrace silence. This empowers both parties and mitigates misunderstandings.
Three actionable takeaways emerge:
- Curbing Guesswork: Replace advice with inquiries, avoiding assumptions.
- Embracing Silence: Refrain from interrupting; let the conversation unfold.
- Empowering Clarity: Illuminate ambiguity with pointed questions, like turning on a light in a dim room.
Clarity is pivotal for communication and confidence. As confusion clears, so does wavering confidence. Become the beacon of clear understanding, fostering brighter connections.
Prepare to harness the might of clear confidence. Chander Shankar signs off, urging you to embrace your unequivocal, confident self. Until next time, keep shining!
Unleash your inner strength with Chander Shankar, your NLP life coach! In this episode, we're diving deep into the world of willpower and understanding how it's the key to achieving your dreams. Join us on a journey to harness this hidden force within you. Learn how living by your values and practicing gratitude can supercharge your confidence. Tune in for your two-minute dose of motivation!
Get ready to feel inspired with Chander Shankar, your friendly guide to a better life. In today's episode, Chander talks about a big idea – Necessity versus Possibility. It's about choosing between what you must do and what you can dream about. Discover how your choices shape your life, and learn how to make choices that light up your path. Join in for quick wisdom and a journey towards a brighter future.
Join Chander Shankar, your NLP life coach, in episode #63 as we dive into "Believe in Yourself: Overcoming Self-Doubt." Discover how to tackle self-doubt, embrace your worth, and unleash your potential. Learn easy practices to boost your confidence and step into a life without limits. Tune in and start your journey toward self-belief today! Suitable for all ages.
Join NLP life coach Chander Shankar on a journey to boost your motivation in just 2 minutes! In today's episode, discover why seeking approval from others isn't always the key to success. Learn how to believe in yourself, handle negative feedback, and find positivity in every situation. Get ready to supercharge your self-esteem and growth mindset!
Join NLP life coach Chander Shankar in this episode as he explores why clinging to the past can hinder our journey to abundance and prosperity. Discover how letting go of negative emotions and using past experiences as stepping stones can unlock a brighter future. Learn practical tips like practising gratitude, meditation, and focusing on positivity to rewrite your story and embrace the path to success. Tune in for a quick boost of motivation and empower yourself to create the prosperous future you deserve.
Join NLP life coach Chander Shankar in this quick, uplifting episode as he takes you on a journey from where you are to where you want to be. Life is a constant adventure, filled with goals and dreams. Discover the power to shape your emotions and steer your journey towards success and happiness. Tune in to get motivated and inspired to create your path from the present to your desired state.
Discover the joy in life's simple moments with NLP life coach Chander Shankar. In a world consumed by comparison and future worries, this episode reminds us to pause and appreciate the present. From nature's beauty to cherished memories, happiness surrounds us daily. Chander offers actionable tips to infuse your days with happiness, encouraging reflection and growth. Embrace the now, celebrate the small joys, and transform your perspective. Tune in for a quick boost of positivity and take steps towards a happier you.
In this podcast, Chander Shankar, a NLP life coach, talks about a simple yet powerful lesson we can learn from an experiment. Imagine a paper with a black dot in one corner. Most people focus on the dot, but there's one child who looks at the rest of the paper and sees clouds and sunlight.
Chander relates this to life, where we often overlook the good things and search for happiness elsewhere. Comparing ourselves to others can lead us astray. He suggests focusing on the positive side of things even when they don't go as planned, just like looking at the empty parts of the paper.
Chander gives us a challenge: think about things that didn't go well, find good things about them, learn from each day, and do this for a week. He reminds us that, like the child who saw clouds, we can choose to focus on the good and make our lives better.
Welcome to Episode #57 of our podcast, where NLP life coach Chander Shankar delves into a powerful topic: 'Compliments vs. Complaints - The open secret that everyone should know.' In this episode, Chander explores the impact of sincere compliments and negative complaints on our lives. Discover how giving and receiving compliments can elevate our mood, foster positivity, and lead to personal growth. Chander shares practical steps to cultivate a habit of offering compliments and encourages us to shift away from complaints. Join us as we explore the transformative potential of choosing compliments over complaints.
Join Chander Shankar, your NLP life coach, in this 2-minute motivational journey where we explore the concept of timing and decision-making. Do you often wait for the perfect moment to act? Are you hesitant due to fear of failure? Chander guides us through the power of the present moment. Our memories and future imaginations happen in the now. Discover the truth behind good and bad decisions and learn to embrace gratitude, trust your inner guidance, and consider short-term and long-term outcomes. Don't let hesitation steal your focus from the present, where your true power resides. Remember, the right time is always now. Tune in and empower your journey!
Welcome to "Crush Procrastination, Ignite Energy," the podcast that empowers you to conquer those pending tasks and unlock your hidden energy reserves. Join NLP life coach Chander Shankar as he simplifies the reasons behind procrastination, guides you to overcome it, and harnesses the power of completing tasks to boost your motivation. Learn how to make the most of your time, find gratitude in your accomplishments, and transform stress into positive energy. Tune in and set yourself on a path to a more productive and fulfilling life. Remember, you've got the energy within you – it's time to set it free!
n NLP life coach Chander Shankar in this uplifting 2-minute podcast as he explores The Pressure to Succeed. Remember those moments when you aimed for success and felt the weight of expectations? Chander shares how gratitude and celebrating our achievements can shift our perspective, ease stress, and pave the way for clarity. Discover actionable steps to practice gratitude, mindfulness, and positive thinking. Tune in to infuse your day with motivation and a renewed mindset.
Join Chander Shankar, your friendly NLP life coach, on a journey of self-discovery and positivity in 'Chander Shankar's 2-Minute Boost.' In each episode, Chander brings you bite-sized motivational insights to brighten your day. Explore the empowering concept of 'nonnegotiables' – those unique elements that impact our happiness. Through creative analogies and relatable stories, Chander simplifies this idea for listeners of all ages, guiding them to uncover their happiness triggers. With practical tips and a touch of magic, Chander encourages you to identify your 'nonnegotiables,' fostering a brighter and more fulfilled life. Tune in to embrace your personal power and embark on a journey towards success and prosperity!
In Episode 52 of the podcast, join Chander Shankar, your friendly NLP life coach, for a quick and inspiring exploration into the question: 'Who controls our life?' Through relatable anecdotes and insights, Chander sheds light on how our perception often shapes our experiences. With a relatable story of rain and a parking spot, he emphasizes the power of taking charge of our own situations, leading to positive outcomes. Discover how being the captain of your thoughts can transform your life's direction. Tune in for this empowering episode that reminds us to reframe our perspectives and steer our lives towards happiness.
For a discovery call, please visit www.enkindleandempower.com/bookings/
Download a copy of Chander's latest book "Unlocking Your Inner Strength" from www.enkindleandempower.com/books/
Welcome to 'Be Inspired Towards your success,' where we dive deep into the art of decision-making. Join NLP life coach Chander Shankar as he unravels the reasons behind our decisions gone awry and reveals how to harness our inner power to make choices that truly work for us. Discover the impact of past experiences on our choices, learn to clear limiting beliefs, and embrace gratitude, mindfulness, and understanding for a brighter decision-making journey. Tune in to empower your choices and transform your mindset!
Welcome to the world of motivation with Chander Shankar, your NLP life coach! Join us for bite-sized inspiration in our two-minute podcast episodes. In today's episode, we explore the incredible power of flexibility. Just like navigating a river's flow, being flexible helps us conquer life's changes and challenges. Discover how flexibility reduces stress, uncovers hidden opportunities, and guides us toward the life we desire. Learn simple practices to embrace change, from gratitude and meditation to stepping out of your comfort zone. Tune in to unleash your inner superhero of adaptability! This is your journey to a more flexible, empowered you. Presented in a way even a 10-year-old can grasp, let's embark on this exciting adventure together. Flexibility is the key to a brighter future. Stay tuned, stay flexible, and keep thriving!
"Welcome to 'Conquering Negativity for Success' with Chander Shankar, your go-to NLP life coach! In just two minutes, Chander empowers you to transform negative thoughts into stepping stones towards a brighter future. Discover how to overcome challenges, boost productivity, and enhance relationships by embracing negative emotions. Unveil the secrets to resilience, gratitude, and mindful growth. Tune in for actionable insights that even a 10-year-old can grasp, and unlock the path to a life filled with abundance and happiness."
Title: Unlocking Your Inner Strength: Taking Control of Your Circumstances for a Positive Transformation!
Description:
In this empowering 2-minute podcast, join NLP Life Coach Chander Shankar as he shares valuable insights to help you unleash your inner strength and transform your life. Discover how our circumstances influence various aspects of our journey, and learn how to respond effectively to bring about positive outcomes.
Chander delves into the common struggles we face, such as a busy work schedule or dealing with negative emotions, and explores practical strategies to regain control and create a fulfilling life. From blocking calendars to prioritize self-care to asking empowering questions that drive us towards success, these simple yet powerful techniques will empower you to navigate challenges with confidence.
Unlock the potential within you as you gain actionable tips to listen to your emotional needs and cultivate a positive mindset. Chander's relatable real-life examples will inspire you to make a positive impact on your personal and professional life.
Are you ready to embrace change and steer your life in the direction of your dreams? Tune in to this motivational podcast and embark on a journey of self-discovery and growth.
For more personalized guidance on your personal growth journey, book a discovery call with Chander Shankar to explore how he can support your transformational path.
Subscribe now and start unlocking your inner strength for a happier and more empowered life!
Book your Discovery Call at https://enkindleandempower.com/bookings/
Join NLP Life coach, Chander Shankar, in this empowering and motivating 2-minute audio podcast. In the beginning, Chander shares exciting news about the launch of his new book, 'Unlocking Your Inner Strength,' available on Amazon Kindle. He then delves into the topic of 'Finding our Inspiration,' exploring the power of inspiration and its impact on our daily lives. Through simple examples and thought-provoking questions, Chander encourages listeners to identify their sources of inspiration and embrace conscious choices to live a purposeful and fulfilling life. Tune in and discover how to unlock your inner strength and find the inspiration you need to achieve greatness!
Join Chander Shankar, an NLP Life coach dedicated to empowering and transforming lives, in this enlightening 2-minute podcast. Discover the leading cause of stress in our lives – confusion, and how it affects our decisions and emotions. Chander explores the importance of purpose and alignment with our values to find clarity and harmony within ourselves.
Learn practical techniques to address confusion, like practising gratitude, focusing on solutions, and asking "why" to uncover the root causes. Embrace meditation and mindfulness to find relaxation and steadiness in your journey towards a stress-free and purposeful life.
As you strive to unlock your inner strength, remember that Chander's new book, "Unlocking Your Inner Strength: Inspire. Act. Empower. Thrive." is now available on Amazon Kindle. Don't miss this empowering opportunity!
🇦🇺 Australia: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B0CD138M2F
🇺🇸 USA: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CD138M2F
🇬🇧 UK: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0CD138M2F
🇮🇳 India: https://www.amazon.in/dp/B0CD138M2F
Join the quest for clarity and personal growth today. Book a discovery call with Chander to uncover your true potential and transform your life.
This is Chander Shankar, your NLP Life coach, guiding you towards a life of purpose and fulfilment. Stay tuned and keep growing!
Discovery Call: https://enkindleandempower.com/bookings/
Join Chander Shankar, an NLP Life coach dedicated to empowering and transforming lives, in this inspiring 2-minute podcast. In today's episode, Chander shares his exciting news about the launch of his new book, "Unlocking our Inner Strength," available on Amazon Kindle.
🇦🇺 Australia: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B0CD138M2F
🇺🇸 USA: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CD138M2F
🇬🇧 UK: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0CD138M2F
🇮🇳 India: https://www.amazon.in/dp/B0CD138M2F
Delve into the topic of "What Inspires Change" as Chander takes you on a journey of introspection. Discover the true catalysts behind your decisions to change and how these powerful "insights" come from within, unique to each individual. Learn how our past experiences and beliefs shape our interpretations of the world and why change is a personal and deeply meaningful experience.
Don't miss Chander's practical advice on preserving and cherishing these invaluable insights, ensuring they become potent internal motivators for positive transformations in your life. Tune in and unlock the potential within you, and book a discovery call with Chander to explore your personal growth journey further. Embrace change, believe in yourself, and let your inner strength guide you to a more empowered life.
In this empowering episode, NLP Life Coach Chander Shankar dives deep into the topic of confidence and how it affects our lives. Have you ever felt like you lack confidence? Chander starts by exploring this common challenge and helps you discover ways to overcome it.
In today's fast-paced world, we face information overload and constant comparisons with others through TV, mobile, and social media. But what if we could break free from this cycle and stop caring about what others think? How would it change our confidence levels and ultimately, our lives?
Chander shares valuable insights on contextualizing situations and focusing on your strengths. Remember, not feeling confident in one area doesn't define who you are as a person. Reflect on times when you were super confident in various aspects of your life – it's all about consistent practice and learning from failures.
The episode also includes actionable tips to boost your confidence. Chander encourages practicing gratitude, challenging limiting beliefs, taking control of your thoughts, and exploring meditation and mindfulness techniques to remain calm during challenging times.
Building confidence is a journey that requires dedication and perseverance. Chander invites you to take the next step in your personal growth journey by booking a discovery call with him. Together, you can work towards transforming your life and becoming unshakably confident in all you do.
Tune in to this episode now and discover how you can cultivate unwavering confidence, one step at a time. Keep growing and empowering yourself! 🌟
Book your discovery call at https://enkindleandempower.com/bookings/
In this episode, we talk about making important decisions in our lives. You know, those moments when we "have to" choose between what we want and what we think we "should" do?
Transcript:
Today, I want to talk about making important decisions in our lives. You know, those moments when we have to choose between what we want and what we think we should do.
Think back to a time when you had to make a big decision, like negotiating your salary during a job interview. Did you settle for less than you wanted, or did you stand up for what you deserved?
We all face situations where we have to decide what matters most to us. Should we do things because we feel we have no choice (like accepting a job offer just to have a job), or should we explore other possibilities (like continuing to negotiate or searching for a better opportunity)?
This way of thinking is deeply ingrained in us from childhood. We may have learned to prioritize others' needs over our own, always worrying about what others might think or say about us.
Living this way may not be wrong, but it can lead to negative emotions and low energy over time. We might not even realize that we have a choice in how we live our lives.
But the truth is, we do have a choice. When we choose to live authentically, others' opinions no longer define us. We do things for others because we genuinely want to, not out of obligation. This empowers us to give from a place of true intent, making us feel more fulfilled and energized.
Here's what you can do:
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Be grateful for all the experiences life brings your way.
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Take a moment to think about your options in any situation and choose the one that empowers you.
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If you feel like you "must" or "should" do something, remember that it's still a conscious choice you're making.
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Understand the values that are being fulfilled with your choices, whether they are necessary or possible, and take responsibility for the consequences.
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Learn from every decision you make, whether driven by necessity or possibility, and use those lessons to make even better choices in the future.
Remember, you have the power to shape your life. Embrace the choices that align with your true self, and let go of the need to please others.
I'm Chander Shankar, an NLP Life coach dedicated to helping you empower and transform your life. If you'd like to explore more about how I can support your personal growth journey, book a discovery call with me. Together, we can empower you to live a more fulfilling life.
Discovery Call: https://enkindleandempower.com/bookings/
Disclaimer: https://enkindleandempower.com/disclaimer/
In this episode, we talk about how our perception of failure can limit our potential.
Transcript:
Today, I want to share a powerful insight with you that can change the way you see failure.
So, let's talk about failure. What is it really? A few years ago, I went through a tough time when I had to move from one place to another. I felt like I failed because circumstances forced me to leave behind the life I had built for six years.
But you know what? As I settled into the new place, something amazing happened. I made new friends, found a new job, and started enjoying my social life. Suddenly, I felt like I wasn't a failure anymore.
But life is full of surprises, and after a few more years, I had to move again. And guess what? Those old feelings of failure came rushing back. It seemed like I was stuck in a cycle of believing I was a failure every time I faced a challenge.
But here's the thing: as time went on, things fell into place again. My confidence grew, and I started thinking positively. And just like that, I didn't feel like a failure anymore.
When I took a moment to look back, I realized something important. Failure is just a way of looking at things. In reality, there's no such thing as failure. It's all about feedback and results.
Feedback is like the lessons we learn from the events in our lives. Results come from the choices we make, or sometimes, the choices we don't make.
You see, you can't control every situation that comes your way. Life can be unpredictable. But what you can control are the choices you make. When you turn a choice into a decision, there will be consequences, both short-term and long-term.
But remember, these consequences don't define you. They are just results – outcomes of the decisions you made.
The true power lies in taking ownership of your results. Embrace the feedback life gives you, and use it to grow and improve. That's how you move forward and create a life you love.
So, my dear listeners, there is no such thing as failure. Only feedback and results. If you remember this, you'll see that you have the power to shape your life.
Hello there, I'm Chander Shankar, an NLP Life coach dedicated to helping you empower and transform your life. If you want to learn more about how I can support you on your personal growth journey, I invite you to book a discovery call. Together, we'll uncover the incredible potential within you. Stay positive, embrace the feedback, and keep moving forward. Until next time!
Discovery Call: https://enkindleandempower.com/bookings/
Disclaimer: https://enkindleandempower.com/disclaimer/
In this episode, we talk about the importance of self-love and how we need to focus on positive thinking.
To book a discovery call, visit https://enkindleandempower.com/bookings/
Disclaimer: https://enkindleandempower.com/disclaimer/
Transcript:
I was recently working with a team on a fun activity where we had to arrange names by their last names. Everyone was doing great until one team member made a small mistake. Instead of fixing it, he said, "I am not good with alphabetical order sorting."
Have you ever found yourself in a similar situation? Maybe you made a little error, and instead of owning up to it, you criticized yourself, thinking you're just not good enough? Well, you're not alone. We all tend to do that sometimes.
But guess what? That habit of self-criticism can be more harmful than you think. It can chip away at your confidence and self-esteem over time.
The truth is, we are not perfect, and that's okay! Making mistakes is a natural part of learning and growing. Even the smartest people make errors. The key is not to label ourselves based on those mistakes.
We often confuse self-love with being selfish. Being selfish means only thinking about yourself without caring for others. But self-love is different. It's about accepting ourselves with all our flaws and knowing that we can improve and be better.
So, what can we do to practice self-love and grow from our mistakes? First, use positive affirmations. Tell yourself, "I'm still learning," "I know this," or "I can get better." Trust me, these simple phrases can work wonders.
Next, have faith in your abilities. Believe that you can handle whatever comes your way. It's all about having the confidence that you'll be alright as long as you learn and grow from every opportunity that comes your way.
Remember, my friend, you are capable of amazing things. Don't let self-criticism hold you back. Embrace self-love, and watch yourself soar to new heights! If you want more guidance on your journey of personal growth, book a discovery call with me. Until next time, keep learning, keep growing, and keep shining! You've got this!
Hi there! I'm Chander Shankar, an NLP Life coach dedicated to helping you empower and transform your life. Today, I want to talk about courage and how it plays a significant role in our lives.
How much courage is needed for change? Have you ever wondered how to develop courage when you're not sure if you have it? Well, let's explore this together.
Courage is like a secret power that we all possess, and we use it more often than we realize. Think back to the first time you rode a bike or drove a car. Remember that nervous feeling, not knowing if you would succeed or not? But you did it anyway. That's courage in action. It's facing the unknown and possible failure, and yet, you take that leap of faith.
And you know what? You've been showing courage all your life, in big and small ways. But in today's world, the word "courage" gets thrown around so much that it may seem like it's only needed for super difficult or impossible tasks.
But courage is needed in everyday situations too. From discussing your performance with your boss to starting a new YouTube video or even having an important conversation with a friend. Every step we take involves some risk, but the potential rewards are often worth it.
So why do we hesitate? Why do we sometimes feel like we can't dare to move forward? Well, it's because stepping out of our comfort zone can be scary. But here's the key – you don't have to face it alone. Showing courage means being vulnerable and seeking help from someone you trust. That can be the way to overcome our fears and grow.
Believe in yourself and your courage. You have everything you need to succeed. Take that first step towards your goal, and you'll feel the power flowing through you.
Remember, the world becomes a better place when we all believe in ourselves and have the courage to pursue our dreams. So, go ahead and embrace your courage!
And if you'd like to learn more about personal growth and how I can support you on your journey, don't hesitate to book a discovery call. Let's unlock your true potential together. Until next time, stay courageous and keep shining bright!
Disclaimer: https://enkindleandempower.com/disclaimer/
In this episode, we will dive into the topic of success and how we can get there. For booking a discovery call, please visit https://enkindleandempower.com/bookings/
In this episode, we talk about how our unique perspectives shape our beliefs and how we can avoid misunderstandings and assumptions. For setting up a discovery call, please visit https://enkindleandempower.com/bookings/
In this episode, we talk about how we can change our bad days into learning opportunities and focus on what we can control and influence because everyone is doing their best.To book a discovery call, please visit www.enkindleandempower.com
In this episode, I share insights on how you can find success in your mistakes by taking responsibility and learning from your behaviours and bad habits.
In this episode, we explore how our default responses and emotions can have an impact on our lives.
I'm Chander Shankar, a life coach dedicated to helping you empower and transform your life. If you're ready to take your personal growth journey to the next level, join me every Sunday evening from 4-6 pm for a transformative Life Coaching Masterclass. Discover more details and register on my website at https://enkindleandempower.com/coaching-events/
DISCLAIMER: The content provided in this podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional advice. Please consult with a qualified professional for personalized guidance.
In this empowering 2-minute episode of our daily motivation podcast, we explore the profound concept that "Limitations Create Value." Join your host, [Your Name], as we delve into the transformative power of embracing limitations and how they can lead us to discover our true potential and create something remarkable.
We often view limitations as roadblocks holding us back from achieving our goals. However, in this episode, we challenge this perspective and reveal how limitations can become the catalysts for creativity, innovation, and personal growth. By shifting our mindset and seeing limitations as stepping stones rather than barriers, we unlock a world of hidden opportunities.
Drawing inspiration from some of history's greatest inventions and breakthroughs, we learn how iconic figures such as the Wright brothers turned limitations into opportunities for progress. This episode will motivate you to become a resourceful problem solver, adapting and discovering your unique strengths when faced with limitations.
Throughout this episode, your host offers practical tips on making limitations work in your favor. By accepting limitations as a natural part of life and focusing on what you can do rather than what you can't, you'll develop the resilience and creativity needed to thrive in any situation.
Join us today and let this episode empower you to see limitations in a new light. Embrace them as allies on your journey to personal growth and self-discovery. Remember, it's not the absence of limitations that defines us; it's how we rise above them. Tune in now and discover how limitations can lead you to create something truly extraordinary!
In this short episode, we talk about emptiness and stillness as a way to achieve growth and happiness.
In this short episode, we talk about how changing how we listen can change everything around us
In this short episode, we learn how we can change our perception of missed opportunities and make them work for us.
In this Episode, we talk about how you can solve your problems by choosing the side of problem or the side of solution.
Did you know that there is a big difference between having the confidence to do something and having competence?
We often confuse one with another, and that becomes the source of our failures.
Can you remember the last time when you competed? Perhaps it was a competition of singing or a game of badminton or maybe chess? How well did you believe you were at your skill? What about the skills and competence of your opponent?
Did you believe that you were better? Was your belief based on your confidence or competence?
Suppose you lost. Would you consider that as luck or lack of competence? Were you overconfident?
We all have our answers to the above questions, and we can be right about them.
What's truly important is the fact that we need always to understand the difference between being confident and being competent.
In life, we will always come across situations where we have the confidence to make things happen even though we haven't necessarily done it before.
Having confidence doesn't always mean that we have the knowledge, skills and experience. It does mean that we dare to try, and if we fail, we can accept the results as new learnings and add them to our skillset.
What can you do:
- Practice gratitude. Be thankful for the confidence in your abilities
- Practice learning from all your experiences
- Practice sharing what you know with every one
- Practice knowing that it's okay to fail with confidence because every failure another step towards success
Being competent is not always enough. It would help if you also had the confidence to share it with courage.
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Chander Shankar NLP Coach and Mentor Enkindle and Empower Pty Ltd http://www.enkindleandempower.com/ New messages shared every day by 8 AM Sydney Time.
Do you have problems?
Do you wish you didn't have them?
Did you want a life without drama?
In life, we always want the easy way out. We want to be in our comfort zone and achieve everything without making a lot of effort.
Can you remember at least one or two people in your life who haven't struggled much, yet they have everything you wanted?
Can you also remember at least two to three people who have been struggling for success in their lives? Are you one of them?
It's our mindset that matters in each situation. If a problem presents itself, should we think more about what could go wrong or how we can learn and grow? We have all heard about "Thinking outside the box". It's where creativity and innovation exist. Right? When we are thinking outside the box, we can deal with situations without constraints and challenges.
It seems the right thing to do. Our mind can feel its unlimited potential and can think of numerous options.
What if "thinking outside the box" wasn't an option?
What if you had to live "inside the box" and work through the challenges and problems?
When we are constrained and limited in opportunities, we tend to think more creatively. We try harder and possibly fail faster. That doesn't necessarily make us a failure. We learn and grow more.
What can you do: * Practice gratitude. Be thankful for your problems. They are there to help you learn and grow. * Practice working within constraints as it will help you learn more about yourself. * Practice being uncomfortable so that you can understand how your emotions can help you be resilient. Working with constraints is probably the best thing that can happen to us. We understand discomfort in a new way. We have the opportunity to push ourselves and learn discipline. In this situation, we should conserve our energies, prioritise our actions and get quick feedback from results.
*******
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Chander Shankar NLP Coach and Mentor Enkindle and Empower Pty Ltd http://www.enkindleandempower.com/ New messages shared every day by 8 AM Sydney Time.
Did you know that Caring is one of the core human values and need? We care for ourselves and others because it is embedded in our DNA. We also equate “Care” via other values such as Love and compassion. Regardless of what we use, caring for ourselves and others is the most critical part of our lives. So why do we forget to take care of ourselves? Why do we inflict so my pain and suffering to our minds by taking stress? One of the main reasons is the mistaken belief that if we don’t care for ourselves while taking care of people we love, they will get better. We develop guilt and worry and create a future of negative possibilities. We forget that our Values are not just what we want. It’s also what we give. So, if we have to show CARE, we need to also take care of ourselves.
We have heard the story where a parent is asked to put on their oxygen mask first before putting it on for their children in a plane. It is common sense. Right? Then why does common sense fail us when we are taking care of our loved ones? We become so worried and fear the worst, stop doing our routines, sleep late and suffer. What if we could change all that? What if we could show our loved ones how to be positive and live a good life even during times of distress? Wouldn’t they be happier? Wouldn’t they feel inspired and want to live and love you more? What can we do: * Practice Gratitude. Let’s be thankful for the people in our lives. * Practice Meditation and Mindfulness. Let’s keep track of our emotions and feelings. * Practice thinking your thoughts because observation changes behaviour. As soon as you think about what you have on your mind, your thoughts are bound to change. * Practice caring for yourself so that you can care for others.
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Chander Shankar NLP Coach and Mentor Enkindle and Empower Pty Ltd http://www.enkindleandempower.com/ New messages shared every day by 8 AM Sydney Time.
How does one get triggered for negativity?
What specific words do we hear or actions we see that make us start going into a pessimistic mindset?
E.g. You are driving, and you see a person changes lanes and slows down in front of you. You suddenly start behaving differently.
You are at the dining table and ready to have dinner when someone comments on food quality. You suddenly become angry.
You are meeting and discussing an important proposal when someone interrupts and points out grammatical mistakes in your presentation. You suddenly become annoyed and frustrated.
One of the dictionary definition of “Priming” is _prepare (someone) for a situation, typically by supplying them with relevant information._
Everyone has such words deep-rooted in their unconscious. As soon as you hear them, the emotions kick in, and we go into that zone automatically.
To be able to recover from this situation is very important. One should know that they have been triggered and that it's not personal.
Being in control of our emotions and behaviour at this time is crucial. For many, it doesn't come naturally.
So what can you do: - Practice Gratitude. Be thankful for your senses that pick up new words and new insights - Practice mindfulness and meditate. It will help you understand your thoughts and emotions - Practice thinking about your thoughts. Just by observing what you are thinking, you can be in more control over your needs and desires - Practice thinking about short term and long term consequences of tour actions
When we get triggered with Priming words or actions, our behaviour becomes automatic. The only way to change this automatic behaviour is via consistent practice.
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Chander Shankar NLP Coach and Mentor Enkindle and Empower Pty Ltd http://www.enkindleandempower.com/ New messages shared every day by 8 AM Sydney Time.
If I asked you how many emotions you go through during the entire day, what would you say?
What percentage of these emotions are positive and what percentage are negative?
I'm sure half of you will be guessing a number. And its okay. We have so many things to do. We don't usually keep a count of our emotions.
Our emotions determine our quality of life. When we say that we need to find positives and focus on the future, it's about the associated emotions.
In life, we often find it hard to change from negative thinking to positive ones.
We already know that observation changes behaviour. An excellent way to switch from one thought to another is to “think what we are thinking.”
Let me explain with a quick example.
Suppose I had a long day at work and am very tired. All I want is to get home and relax. I get into my car and while driving home, I am constantly bothered by another car that is not following the rules. I start having negative emotions, and it impacts my mood and my driving. When I get home, I am even more agitated and aggressive than usual.
What if, that vehicle was an ambulance?
What if there was a sick person in the car and they were rushing to the doctor?
Would I have the same emotions?
Have you heard about the train of thoughts? It’s called a train for a reason.
If we start thinking our thoughts and start labelling our emotions, we will realise that we don't have to jump onto that train every time. We can watch it pass and welcome the learnings and insights.
So what can you do: - Practice gratitude. Be thankful for your experiences - Practice listing your thoughts multiple times a day. - When there is uneasiness and discomfort, practice thinking about the emotions you are feeling - Label your negative emotions and watch them fade away
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Chander Shankar NLP Coach and Mentor Enkindle and Empower Pty Ltd http://www.enkindleandempower.com/ New messages shared every day by 8 AM Sydney Time.
When was the last time you tried something new?
Do you have trouble doing things that make you uneasy?
E.g. At work, there is a new team formed, and they are asking volunteers who can help. Specifically, they want you to coordinate knowledge sharing sessions twice a month. It involves reaching out to people whom you don't know. There is little chance of success. What would you do?
At home, you want to change that painting on the wall. You know what you want, but you are unable to find it online or in shops. Will you be willing to go that extra yard and make that yourself? Will you try something different?
We all face adversity and challenging times in our life when that extra step or an additional effort could make a difference to our success or motivation.
Remember the last time you pushed yourself into sports or when you experimented with cooking?
However, because of fear of failure or procrastination, we don't do things that could spark our creativity.
Imagine if you lived life as a series of experiments?
What would happen if you could experiment with each experience and find out what you were good at?
What if you learned something new about yourself in the process?
The best thing about experimental living is that you always have the opportunity to go back to the status quo. You also don’t feel bad if you fail because that fault is not part of who you are.
What can you do: - Practice Gratitude. Let's be thankful for the opportunities we get in our lives. - Practice experimenting with small changes - Practice pushing yourself to do something different each day that helps you learn something more - Practice understanding your mindset for change and learning what emotions you have when you go through the process
We tell our children to push themselves, try new things, be creative and challenge their beliefs. Could we possibly start doing the same thing for ourselves?
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Chander Shankar NLP Coach and Mentor Enkindle and Empower Pty Ltd http://www.enkindleandempower.com/ New messages shared every day by 8 AM Sydney Time.
Did you know that one of the main reasons why we don't get 100% results for our actions is because of the various options we keep up our sleeve? Think about the last time you had to buy a TV or a household appliance such as Fridge or Washing Machine? Did you truly need all the features it provides? How often do you need them? But it feels nice to have those options? Right? Could you have spent a hundred or two hundred dollars less and got the thing which would have been sufficient? What about when you had to provide a time estimate to your boss about the work you are doing? Did you add buffer? Did you keep your options open? It's human nature to have more options all the time. We want to have a fallback plan and be comfortable. Can you imagine the kind of thoughts and emotions we have in this case? Now, remember that time when you were working under constraints? Did it make you uncomfortable? Working under limitations, were you able to push yourself and get the job done? Even though you did not have many options, you started thinking creatively and focused more since you had to complete the work. In a study done at MIT, two batches of students were asked to submit their work. The first one was given the option to submit on the due date six weeks away, without any interim review submissions. The second one had to submit the assignment every week for interim review, and then the final submission was due in 6 weeks. Which group do you think passed in flying colours? I would guess it would be group 2. It's always in our control how we want to work for our success. If we always keep all our prospects open, are constantly in our comfort zones, and don't feel the need to push ourselves, perhaps we will always find ourselves in sticky situations. What can you do: * Practice Gratitude. Be thankful for the various opportunities we get in life. * Practice being uncomfortable each day to know what kind of emotions you have. * Practice learning from your challenging experiences. They will help you grow.
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Chander Shankar NLP Coach and Mentor Enkindle and Empower Pty Ltd http://www.enkindleandempower.com/ New messages shared every day by 8 AM Sydney Time.
Did you know that there is a structure for every spoken language?
Think about the following sentences:
I am hungry I am late I am happy
What kind of thoughts come to your mind? Based on your current context, you may have noticed that you will feel differently at different times in a day.
According to Noel Chomsky, our language has two kinds of structures.
Surface Structure and Deep Structure.
The surface structure is where we take the meaning of the words literally and generally react to them. When we focus on the surface structure, we are easily triggered and can make lots of mistakes.
Usually, when there is a negative comment or negative thinking involved, surface structure can also help us make faster decisions to ignore them.
The second kind of Structure is the Deep Structure. This is the kind of language that we use in self-talk when we interpret the meaning of words per our model of reality and have long term emotions.
The deep structure can be harmful if we don't seek feedback and ask questions. On the contrary, it can be helpful to understand the big picture.
Depending on our current situation, we should always consider both of them before making a judgement.
So what can you do:
- Practice Gratitude. Be thankful for this understanding of language.
- Let's be grateful for the various events that give meaning to our life.
- Practice understanding the surface and deep structure in every conversation
- Practice asking questions and being curious rather than making assumptions and pre-judgements.
We all use surface and deep structures unconsciously. Imagine how useful it would be when you are aware of them all the time.
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Chander Shankar NLP Coach and Mentor Enkindle and Empower Pty Ltd http://www.enkindleandempower.com/ New messages shared every day by 8 AM Sydney Time.
Repeating patterns
Do you know that each one of us has programming of behaviour based on our emotional triggers?
E.g. When you go shopping, how do you decide it's the right time to buy a shirt, a dress or a showpiece for your home?
Do you remember the last time when you made an impulsive purchase?
Can you think of times when you were passing by McDonald's or a candy shop, and you are unable to resist the temptations?
What kind of emotional triggers were involved? What were the visual or auditory cues that made you decide?
Each one of us has unique behavioural patterns that kick in when such situations happen. These patterns are so automatic that we hardly realise them. Our actions change, and we could do things we might regret later.
E.g. When going for a dress purchase, I might have a pattern such as
- Seeing the dress (visual)
- Imagining myself wearing it (visual)
- Feeling confident and happy
- Imagining my friends appreciate me for wearing it (hearing feedback)
- Waiting for two hours (time)
- Imagine myself wearing the dress again (visual)
- Decision made
The important thing about this example is that there is a hidden pattern of decision making here. If I have to buy a watch or a dress or anything else, I will unconsciously use it the same way every time.
In fact, we can even create a formula for the above.
In NLP, we learn to recognise these patterns as Strategies. We also understand how to break these patterns or change them for our benefits if they are not helping us create success or excellence.
What can you do, and how can you learn more: - Practice Gratitude. The first step is always to be thankful for our experiences - Practise being aware of your emotions - Practice learning your patterns and resisting the urge to do something on impulse - Practice listening to your self-talk that wants to stop you when you are heading towards a decision
All of us can make decisions. It's our ability to know how we make them, that can be the difference between good and bad.
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Chander Shankar NLP Coach and Mentor Enkindle and Empower Pty Ltd http://www.enkindleandempower.com/ New messages shared every day by 8 AM Sydney Time.
How do you start bringing change within?
Do you follow your passion? How is that helping you achieve success?
Recently, while reading a book from Cal Newport, I came across a radical idea that following our passion can be our downfall in our journey towards success.
Cal argues that unless we focus on building our skills and gain experience, following our passions would lead us nowhere.
I agree with him on the concept of Deliberate Practice. He suggests that we should push ourselves to learn unique and valuable skills that we can utilise in the future for our benefits.
When we learn something new, the first 10-15 minutes are crucial. There is resistance to change because of the discomfort it brings along. If we deliberately keep executing our plans, keep learning and practising, the pain gradually goes away.
This technique, when used regularly, creates a sense of confidence, a feeling of control and helps us learn to be resilient. We begin to take responsibility for our lives.
What can you do to bring changes from within: - Practice Gratitude. Be thankful for your ability to learn and grow - Practice becoming a better person with a skill you are good at. - Deliberately Practice building your value by sharing what you know - Deliberately Practice creating a mission and purpose so that it will move you past the current problems
_We all have unlimited potential to achieve everything we want. Perhaps, the only thing missing is Deliberate Practice._
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Chander Shankar NLP Coach and Mentor Enkindle and Empower Pty Ltd http://www.enkindleandempower.com/ New messages shared every day by 8 AM Sydney Time.
I was once reading a book where I came across a beautiful story about a man who believed in making a difference. The story went like this.
In a beach, during high tide, thousands of fishes would wash on the shore. A lot of people would come for morning walks but none would do anything about it.
On a particular morning, a person got out of his car, went to the beach and started throwing the fishes back into the water.
The passersby looked and did nothing. Then an old couple stopped this man and asked him. “There are thousands of fishes washed away. How can you possibly save all of them? What difference does it make?”
The man picked up another dying fish and threw it back into the water, and said, “It made a difference to that one”.
In life, we come across so many situations where we can help and make a difference. We stop because of the sheer magnitude of change we want to make.
What if we could think differently?
What if we could stop planning to change the world and focus on one person at a time?
What if we could find time and courage to make a difference in people's lives one at a time?
What can you do: - Practice gratitude. Let's be thankful for the resources we have. - Let's be grateful for this ability to make a difference - Let's find out what we can do to make a small change - Let's make sure that we are doing our bits to help and support our families and friends. Sometimes, a phone call or a simple message is sufficient
_We may not be able to change everyone in the world, but our efforts could change the world for someone._
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Chander Shankar NLP Coach and Mentor Enkindle and Empower Pty Ltd http://www.enkindleandempower.com/ New messages shared every day by 8 AM Sydney Time.
Unlearning
Have you ever tried to pour water into a glass that is already full? It feels dumb. Right?
But we go through each day doing exactly that.
We start each day with an intent to learn and grow. However, when we encounter things that are contrary to our beliefs, we make judgements. We resist understanding a new perspective.
We try to fill a glass that is already full.
Why does this happen?
Accepting that we could be wrong or acknowledging that there could be something different out there can be challenging. How could our efforts to acquire knowledge, skills, and experience bee a waste of our time and money?
Our ego can be so strong that we reject new learning altogether.
Each day, as we encounter different experiences, it's important to keep an open mind. It's important to empty our cup.
We need to Unlearn what we already know. We need to rest our ego and begin recognising that we may not have all the answers. We should think about the possibility that we could learn something new.
This the essence of a learning and growth mindset. If we are always on the lookout for opportunities that teach us, chances that provide new insights, we will always create a win-win situation.
What can we do:
- Practice Gratitude. Let's be thankful for all opportunities for learning and growth in our lives.
- Let's practice unlearning what we already know
- Let's practice creating an understanding that there is value in diverse opinions
- Let's practice accepting that we don't know everything
Unlearning can be the key to success and happiness if you choose to become a _lifelong learner_.
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Chander Shankar NLP Coach and Mentor Enkindle and Empower Pty Ltd http://www.enkindleandempower.com/ New messages shared every day by 8 AM Sydney Time.
Did you know that every individual goes through different stages of learning and competence every day?
Depending on our priority and interest, we can choose to either learn something new or ignore it completely.
According to the renowned psychologist Noel Burch, our learning and growth mindset is related to our Competence.
Competence is defined as _the ability to do something successfully or efficiently_.
In the first stage of learning called “Unconscious Incompetence”, we don't know about a topic because it's never been shared with us.
In the second stage ”Conscious Incompetence”, we know that we don’t know about a topic. This is the stage where we can choose to learn more become curious or ignore the learning curve. If we choose to learn more, we make an effort to get more information, get new skills and new experiences. E.g. Remember when you started learning to ride a bike or a car for the first time?
The third stage is “Conscious Competence “, where we practice what we learn from stage two. In this stage, we tend to make mistakes but keep learning. We focus on mastery and pursue Excellence. E.g. Do you remember how many mistakes you made while learning to ride a bike or car?
We reach the last stage of “Unconscious Competence”, when we have mastered the knowledge and skills with practice. E.g. Riding a bike or a car. We don't have to make an effort to do something. It becomes automatic and part of our behaviour.
Did you know that most of us spend our lives in stages 2 and 3 but never reach stage 4 because of a lack of discipline and focus?
What can you do: - Practice Gratitude. Be thankful for your learning experiences. - Be grateful for opportunities presented to you - Identify which stage you are in and how you can move forward - Practice being curious and persistent in your learning.
We all have the ability to learn more. It’s our priorities and interests that matter.
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Chander Shankar NLP Coach and Mentor Enkindle and Empower Pty Ltd http://www.enkindleandempower.com/ New messages shared every day by 8 AM Sydney Time.
Getting rid of our negative emotions Everyone gets negative emotions. Do you know why that happens? We are in the middle of a party having fun. Suddenly, some guy comes and steps on your foot, or someone makes fun of you. It triggers negative emotions, and your mood changes. You become angry or frustrated and then leave the party. When you are in a meeting at the office, you suddenly become frustrated because the team says that they can't meet the commitment. You become angry at them and say something you will regret later. What is happening here? It's not normal for you to behave in this way, but you do it. What triggers this kind of behaviour? We create our beliefs and learn about our emotions at a very early age. Have you seen a baby show various emotions like laughter, sadness, anger, fear etc.? Our mind stores all the past unfriendly events and keeps a log. When a similar event happens, it tags them together. This is the reason why we get triggered. To get rid of our negative emotional triggers, we need to revisit our past in a safe environment, understand why we had them, and look for the learnings for each of the past events. Our mind has the capacity and the capability to change the meaning of such events and take the learnings for the future. Focus on our present moment, moving forward towards the future, with taking the lessons from the past is critical for us. Another reason is that the events are not aligned with our values and beliefs. If there is a conflict, then we need to understand the reason for the same. So what can you do: * Practice Gratitude. Be thankful for all the good and bad experiences in life. They are there because of your choices and decisions. They will help you become strong. * Practice being aware of your emotions in the present moment. That will automatically help you control them. * Practice meditation and mindfulness. It will help you understand your emotions and their purpose. * Practice focusing on your values. It is to keep you aligned towards what you want in life. Having negative emotions isn't a bad thing. It helps us understand what we don't want in life.
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Chander Shankar NLP Coach and Mentor Enkindle and Empower Pty Ltd http://www.enkindleandempower.com/ New messages shared every day by 8 AM Sydney Time.
Being Alive
We are living in a very different world today.
Who would have imagined that a tiny organism, one that we can't either see, hear or feel, would govern how we think and act.
Living in fear of a disease that could potentially wipe out humanity has changed our mindset and behaviours.
For some of us, the focus has turned inwards. We have changed our daily routines and habits. We are taking more precautions and are more careful of our health and hygiene.
There still others who are wondering why we have been forced to change. There is resistance to this new normal. They keep thinking that it's a fad and that people are being fed with misinformation.
In either case, the certainty of change exists. Our world is now different, and we have to acknowledge it. We have to accept that things won’t go back to the way they were a few years ago.
The best quality of human beings is our ability to adapt and condition our mindset and thinking in new ways.
Each one of us has a unique moral compass. However, it is also true that our morality comes from our values, beliefs, good or bad experiences in life. We all know the difference between right and wrong.
What if we could all think positively about this current situation?
What if positive thinking meant that we need to think not only about good things but also about what is “right” for you, me and everybody we know?
What if we could stop living in fear and anxiety for one day and celebrate our lives today? What if we could live our life to the fullest today, loving, caring and doing things we most desire?
It's a known fact that the emotion of fear and anxiety can only be overcome by love and affection.
Can we possibly focus on living happily today? Despite all the fears, accepting today's reality, acknowledging that our loved ones may not be at 100%, can we think of how we could love, care, share and live for one day?
Would it possible for us to stop complaining and stop comparing our happiness to others?
What can you do:
- Practice Gratitude. Let's be thankful for each day. Let's be grateful for our mind, body, families, friends, our home and our neighbourhood.
- Practice living each day to the fullest.
- Practice love instead of fear
- Practice caring and sharing instead of being anxious and afraid of future
_We live each day assuming that we have a lot of time. Perhaps being alive means that we live, love, care and share._
So, how are you going to be alive today?
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Chander Shankar NLP Coach and Mentor Enkindle and Empower Pty Ltd http://www.enkindleandempower.com/
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Have you been in an emotionally intense situation?
Was there a time when you were overwhelmed by what you see, hear and feel?
E.g. You are watching a movie, and there is an intensely emotional scene. You try hard, but you can't stop your tears?
At work, you are very upset with a colleague who did not deliver work as agreed.
Having and feeling emotions is good. It only makes us human.
The challenge becomes when we go too deep into them. It becomes a problem when we are unable to control our emotional reactions. This is the state of being Associated.
When we are associated, our physiology goes into an automatic state; we think and act emotionally and regret mistakes later.
Have you done something like this in your past?
On the contrary, when we are dissociated, we act rationally. We understand our feelings and are more relaxed and calm. Our responses are more thorough, and we know the consequences of our actions. We tend to make fewer mistakes and take responsibility.
There are several ways to switch from an Associated to Dissociated state.
One useful technique that works every time is to imagine yourself having these emotions from a distance of 10 meters.
For people who won't have fear of heights, imagine you were observing yourself from a helicopter or a 10th floor balcony of a building.
It's a known fact that observation changes behaviour. So, just by observing ourselves from a distance, we can quickly dissociate from our emotional reactions.
So what can you do : - Practice gratitude. Be thankful for your emotions and feelings. They make us human - Practice meditation and mindfulness to understand your emotions - Practice relaxation and calm by trialling various techniques that keep you dissociated - Practice learning from your emotions and knowing when they are not helping you.
_Emotions are the conduit for understanding our morality. Knowing when to associate and when to dissociate with them can make a big difference in how we pursue success._
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Chander Shankar NLP Coach and Mentor Enkindle and Empower Pty Ltd http://www.enkindleandempower.com/
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The Language of Agreements
Do you have agreements often?
Can you remember the last time you had a conflict of opinions with someone at home or work?
As you remember that specific time, how detailed was your conversation?
What kind of emotions was present?
In every conversation, there is always a concept of Context.
In what context are we have having the discussion, or what context is the conflict related to.
In the heat of the moment, we don’t realise that we are going into too many details.
We don't realise that we are imposing our model of the world on others.
Not everyone thinks as we do. So, in this situation, what is the best outcome we can have.
The Language of Agreements, as I call it, comes from the Linguistic concept of Hierarchy of Ideas.
It's a known fact that when as human beings, our core values are similar. E.g. We all yearn for Love, Security, Respect and Trust.
When we reflect on these values in our conversations, we generally tend to relax and focus on the bigger picture. We are aligned to the higher purpose.
We begin to understand the other person's model of the world. The discussions become ecological and there is win-win for everyone involved.
We also realise that the negative emotions go away.
So what can we do: - Practice gratitude. Be thankful for the people in your lives. - Practice understanding your values - Understand that everyone is doing their best behaviour in the current conditions - Practice being in the present moment and being aware of your emotions. - If the emotions are negative in a conversation, practice abstracting to the level of your values.
We all can have a great conversation. The quality depends on the level of abstraction and win-win for everyone involved.
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Chander Shankar NLP Coach and Mentor Enkindle and Empower Pty Ltd http://www.enkindleandempower.com/
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Do you remember the last time you were in conversation with a friend? As you remember a specific discussion, did you interrupt them and guess what they were going to say? Why do we make assumptions? Why do we think that we know what's on the other person's mind? Why do we believe that their thoughts are the same as what we believe? A common reason is that we listen to validate our thoughts and actions. We fail to understand that their model of the world and their perception of reality could be different. We have around 60,000 thoughts in a day. Imagine if all of them did not make sense? Wouldn't that make us insane? So, for us to manage the next upcoming thought, it needs to make sense. Unconsciously, we have this rush to be correct and move on to the next. Hence, we start filling the gaps in our understanding by interrupting and validating what the other person is saying. When this happens, the other person also feels the need to complete their statements. Usually, the result is that either you or the other person feels ignored or neglected.
One way to handle this is to acknowledge that we don't have all the answers. We should respect the other person's model of the world. We should give them a chance to finish. Being curious and listening to understand is very important as it helps build trust, social connection and rapport. So what can you do: * Practice gratitude. Be thankful for the various people in your life sharing their experiences. * Practice listening to "understand". Asking questions to validate your understanding is more ecological. * When you are in a conversation, practice waiting for the other person to finish. * Practice understanding why you have this need to validate? What would happen if you did not have to validate.
_We don't have to be right every time. The most important thing is to be understood._ ******* Share this message with your friends https://chat.whatsapp.com/GioeEB7Osfz0VbeDO9cTba
Chander Shankar NLP Coach and Mentor Enkindle and Empower Pty Ltd http://www.enkindleandempower.com/
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Have you been in a situation where you were so focused on a particular event in your life that you completely forgot about everything else? Has it ever occurred to you that empathising with someone else could also get you the results you want? What if the failures you have had were giving you a kind of feedback that you could take into your next successful venture? How about that time when you felt that something was impossible until someone else made it happen? Understanding our mindset and self-talk under challenging situations can be the difference between success and failure. When we face a difficult challenge, we ask ourselves if we are moving towards our goal or away from it. E.g. What do I want? What's my end goal? What resources are available? Or What is wrong? Why is it a problem? What caused it? Thinking about our actions as feedback or failure can be vital in determining our success. If we regularly think about feedback, we will ask questions like What did I learn? What's the next thing to improve? There is an unconscious belief that "Everyone wants me to succeed." On the contrary, if we focus on problems, we might ask, " Why did I lose?" "Am I a failure?". We could have an unconscious belief that "No one wants me to succeed". Lastly, when dealing with problems, if we think of them as possibilities, we would have a mindset that focuses on learning and growth. We would habitually ask questions like, "What else can I do?", "What are my options?", "What will get me results?". On the flip side, If we think about the "impossible", we would potentially ask questions such as, "Is this even worth my effort?", "Am I wasting my time?". We will fear change and want to maintain the status quo or remain ignorant. Looking back at our Six facets, "Outcomes vs. Problems", "Feedback vs. Failure", and "Possibilities vs. Impossibilities", we all have been in situations where we have had one kind of thinking or another. We always respond the best way we think. There isn't a right or wrong. We have to ensure that whatever we choose, our focus needs to be towards the future. So what can we do: * Practice Gratitude. Be thankful for the problems and adversity in your life. They are there to help you grow. * Practice understanding your mindset and believe that you can change * Have the courage to challenge your thinking and try to do something uncomfortable each day. * Practice understanding your emotions via meditation and mindfulness.
We can only focus on the future by thinking about future possibilities. Past is always there for lessons.
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Chander Shankar NLP Coach and Mentor Enkindle and Empower Pty Ltd http://www.enkindleandempower.com/
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Understanding why we limit ourselves
Do you remember the time when you felt invincible? Do you remember the confidence and mindset you had to achieve what you wanted? What kind of energy and emotions was present? When you think about your current state and your lack of results, why doesn't your mindset remain the same? Why does it feel that we got lucky the last time, or it was a different time? The meaning of life is to be challenged. We only learn and grow when we are uncomfortable. Imagine reading a book where every chapter said, "everything is fine", "everyone is happy". Would you continue to read it? Imagine a movie where there was no drama? Would you like to watch it? Our mind is wired for a life of drama and difficulties. We can think of unlimited opportunities and endless possibilities. Similarly, we can think of countless challenges and downbeat endings. If we have the ability to succeed but blame external circumstances and lack of opportunities, we can quickly lose hope. This feeling of hopelessness can pull us down. If we believe success is possible but doubt our abilities, we don't focus on learning from our experiences. We feel we are not good enough and feel helpless. Some of us have had such experiences that we believe we don't deserve to be successful. It's a dangerous place to be. We know in our heart and minds how to achieve success but feel unworthy. Feelings of being fake, not belonging and accepting the current situation of pain/suffering are prevalent. What if you could change all this? What if you did not have to limit yourself? What if you could imagine abundance and prosperity in your lives the way you wanted? Wouldn't that be wonderful? The first step is to understand that the challenges and difficulties are the Universe's way of helping us get better than who we are now. Focusing on what is in your control and influence is next. If we can focus our language and self-talk on thinking "what we want" instead of "what we don't want", it will make all the difference. So what can we do: * Practice Gratitude. Be thankful for all the challenging times in your life. They have made you stronger. * Practice understanding your thoughts of negativity. What positive purpose do they serve? * Practice listing at least one thing you learned from your difficulties each day * Practice meditation and mindfulness so that you can understand your thoughts and emotions
Our actions and results drive our beliefs about ourselves. Our results only happen when we take action and focus on learning from each experience.
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Chander Shankar NLP Coach and Mentor Enkindle and Empower Pty Ltd http://www.enkindleandempower.com/
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Creating Goodwill
Do you remember that time when someone helped you in your time of need? Did you feel lucky and blessed? What kind of feelings was present? How did you thank them? Do you remember that person often? Have you helped someone in their time of need? How did you feel about it? Is it easy for you to remember that specific instance? Have you noticed a warm feeling of thankfulness and goodwill emerging inside you in both the above cases? Don't you want this feeling to happen again and again? We all crave social connection, and at a higher level, we need attachment and bonding. When someone helps us, our core values of love and security are met. It gives us satisfaction and happiness and generates fulfilment. Our values are also something we exhibit. We unconsciously find ways to reciprocate the same feelings of love and security by helping others. When an opportunity presents itself, we go ahead and support people in need. Creating goodwill is a human value. It is something that happens when we have a desire to serve. We become more significant than ourselves. We forget our egos, become selfless and give support and hope to people in need. One can genuinely help and support another with complete dedication and positive motivation only when they are unselfish. They don't wish for anything in return and only want happiness for the other. Have you known people to whom you can always go for help; people whom you trust; people who will not judge you? Don't you wish you can be like them? Some people unconsciously create goodwill while others have to practice it. It comes when you genuinely become interested and curious about helping others in need. People don't want you to judge them because of their problems. Sometimes, just listening and understanding their situation is enough. So what can you do: * Practice Gratitude. Be thankful for all the people who were there for you in your difficult times. * Practice helping others. It can be as simple as a phone call to a friend. * Practice understanding your emotions in times of need. When you get help, how happy and satisfied you are. Can you create the same feelings for someone else? * Practice active listening. When we create goodwill, the world will become a better place. There is also a famous saying about this subject, "People will forget what you say, but they will always remember how you made them feel".
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Common Sense vs. Common Practice
Do you believe in common sense? Do you see people practice it often?
Do you feel that sometimes people should be doing one thing, but they do precisely the opposite?
E.g. We all know the importance of exercise and fitness in our lives. It is common sense. But, we ignore common sense and keep sleeping and being lazy. Another example can be at work. We know that we should listen more and say less in meetings when we do not have all the answers. It is common sense. But, to show our usefulness and value, we start talking more and listen less. We do precisely the opposite of common sense.
Why do you think it happens? In critical moments, common sense leaves us.
We are living in the age of competition. Everyone is competing against one another. We constantly compare our lives to others and compete to get better.
In this rush to get better, we forget the most important thing. We ignore that we have all the resources we need to succeed. We make-believe that we are less significant and less valuable than others.
Without thinking through the consequences of our actions, we jump in and volunteer to provide help and support where it isn't required. In our race to be better and be number one, we lose common sense and make mistakes.
Another reason is our understanding of time. When we procrastinate and let things wait, we think we have a lot of time. On the other hand, when we rush to do things without thinking about consequences, we believe we don't have much time.
The concept of time is only in our minds. We live our past experiences in the NOW and also foresee possible futures in the NOW.
The only thing we have in our control is our actions in the present moment. The results of our efforts are beyond our control. We have to understand that even though our intentions may be right unless we think through the long term and short term consequences, our common sense may not become a common practice every time.
So what can we do: * Practice gratitude. Be thankful for your experiences and believe in yourself. * Practice thinking about the long-term and short-term consequences of all the decisions you make. * Practice focusing on win-win for all. Competing is good if it helps you improve your knowledge, skills and experience. * Practice directing your emotions towards your goals. If you feel a sudden need to make decisions, practice asking the purpose of that need.
Common sense can become common practice if it is always about win-win and understanding the short-term and long-term consequences.
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Chander Shankar NLP Coach and Mentor Enkindle and Empower Pty Ltd http://www.enkindleandempower.com/ New messages shared every day by 8 AM Sydney Time.
Why is focus important?
Do you have many things to do today?
Can you multi-task effectively?
How can you manage so many activities in your mind without the extra pressure of not completely half of them?
When some of these activities complete, do you feel relieved?
In today's modern era, we have been made to believe that everyone should do many things at once.
We see in movies and watch people do amazing things on the internet with their limited time.
The constant information overload causes us to compare our lives with people whom we don't even know.
We increase our wishes and desires. We start many things at once and later realise that we are different. We have limited capacity and limited ability to accomplish everything we see.
It could be because of our lack of knowledge, skills and experience. It can be because of our current environment.
To maintain a balance in life, Focusing on what we want is the most important thing. We have to understand that we have everything we need to get everything we want.
We have all the resources. We need to become resourceful. We have to start prioritising our needs such that we get things completed. We have to let go of things that are less important and less likely to be finished.
This way, the negative emotions of shame, guilt, anger and frustration will not creep in.
Once we do that, we will have more energy and can utilise that to achieve our goals. We will have more space in our mind for creativity and motivation to finish what we start.
So what can you do: - Practice gratitude. Be thankful for what you have in life. - Be grateful for your knowledge, skills and experience you have gained over the years - Practice prioritising your daily tasks so that you can finish what you begin - For every job, look for the positive emotions it gives you while you're doing it. Relate your need with the job and imagine success.
Motivation is not the driver for our work. Instead, it's the outcome. It comes after you are already doing and completing the work you have started.
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Everyone has negative emotions.
How does that impact you?
Did you know that even negative emotions have a purpose?
Our brain is hardwired for the safety and security of self and others.
When we have negative emotions, it helps us remember the times of past stress and anxiety. It makes us want to withdraw from the world.
We either unleash physiologically by shouting sometimes becoming aggresive and voilent, or going into our mental caves of solitude and confinement.
We stop taking action for our future and try to maintain the status quo.
So how is it good?
In times of stress, anxiety and negative emotions, our unconscious mind goes back to protecting our body. Because we forget to relax and breathe more, our emotions help us stop that extra bit of activity that can be harmful to us in the long run.
We need to understand that although negative emotions can help us getting harmed, too much of anything is also wrong.
Our concept of morality comes from our values and beliefs. They help us determine the difference between right and wrong. Our emotions are our guide for our morality.
Once we start getting negative, we should understand that something is not congruent with our values. We need to acknowledge that we have to stop.
So what can we do:
- Practice gratitude. Be thankful for your emotions. They are there to protect you from harm
- Practice understanding your awareness. When you have negative emotions, instead of going deep, identify what's wrong
- Practice meditation and mindfulness to understand your thinking
- Practice taking actions towards your future.
Negative emotions can be a conduit for your success. All you need to learn is how you utilise them for your benefits.
Do you remember the last time when you felt terrible about yourself when someone pointed at your mistakes? Do you think about your mistakes often? Does someone else's opinion matter more for you than your own? With the increasing amount of information overload happening over social media and the internet, we are not short of knowledge. Some people will always be ready to point out your mistakes, criticize you and feel proud to have the upper hand in any conversation. If we keep listening to others and base our judgements and decisions on other's opinions, we will never be able to have a fulfilling and happy life. Society has advanced to a point where whatever possessions you have, someone else will always have more. Moreover, our inability to handle such comparisons makes it harder for us to be contented. It's important to note that people have no interest in you. They are merely reflecting their state of mind. When they say something, it usually is about how they think and act. If your actions don't match their thinking, some people will go out of their way to make it known. Unless you are taking feedback from someone who has seen your rise and fall, your ups and downs and been with you on your journey, there is very little reality in what others say. Remember that negative emotions are a way for us to know that we are not moving in the right direction. They are Universe's guide for us to focus on happiness, satisfaction and fulfilment. If you take things personally, you should remember that everyone is fighting their own battles. The negative feedback from others is not to make you sad, angry or in any negative state. It's a sign that you have to think and act differently. What if your negative emotions could become a trigger for you to change? What if you could use your negative emotions to move forward faster towards your goals? What can you do: * Practice gratitude. Be thankful to all the people in your lives. They are there for a reason. * Practice focusing on your awareness. How much time are you spending being present in the negative state, and how can you get away from it? * Practice self-guided meditation and mindfulness exercises. There are hundreds of them available free online, and it doesn't take more than 5 minutes each day. We all get impacted by negative self-talk and negative feedback. How we recover and use it for our success and motivation can be the difference.
Do you remember any time in your past when you got a low grade at school?
Do you remember a specific time when you couldn't win the game for your team?
How did it make you feel? Were you sad or angry?
Do you believe that you did your best but still ended up failing to reach your goal?
Our society and culture only honour the people who are number one. No one remembers the second position holder or third position holder. Success has only one meaning. Be at the top and be first; else, you are a loser.
What if there was another way?
Our life does not need to be a competition all the time. Although the results are important along with the rewards that go with them, it's the feelings that make all the difference.
Fear is an interesting emotion. While most emotions are focused on the past, fear is based on the perception of the future.
When we fear failure, we think about disapproval from our peers, mates and family. We imagine negative situations like “No one will like me”, “I am incapable”, “I am hopeless and worthless”.
We doubt our knowledge, skills, and experience. We forget how far we have come and what we have learned in the process.
Perhaps the best way to deal with the fear of failure is to have faith in our abilities. We need to believe in second chances and if we are failing, think about the longer-term.
What can we do: - Practice gratitude. Be thankful for the opportunities presented and learnings from the same - Practice your skills and focus on mastery. - Practice making your responses automatic by creating habits that help you move forward - Learn to trust yourself and practise responding to failures as missed opportunities. There will always be a next time. - Practice experimenting with your ideas, assuming that even if you fail, you will learn.
Fearing failure is not a bad thing. One must understand that the path to success and satisfaction is through repeated failures and disappointments.
Understanding our performance Do you remember the last time you had a performance appraisal? Were you happy about how it went? Did you believe that you did a better job than others? Do you remember another time when you had to give feedback to someone who worked with you? How did you know that the job was well done or wasn't? The way we measure our performance makes a big difference in how we deal with others. If we believe we are doing well, it shows in our confidence and motivation. In this context, feedback is critical because that helps us understand where we are good and where we need to get better. One of the most important things about getting feedback is its source. Whose feedback do we refer to most determines our attitude and success. Most people have two sources of feedback. One is our self-talk, and the other is external. When we focus on internal feedback or self-talk, a good practice is to use the Imagineering process coined by Walt Disney. In this process, we should take turns to assess feedback from the perspective of a dreamer, realist and critic. It determines our blind spots and keeps it practical. When we rely on external feedback, it is essential to know if it comes from people who have been with you on your journey. This kind of feedback helps you determine what others expect from you and if you can create a win-win situation. What can you do: * Practice gratitude. Be thankful for the various people who are ready to give you feedback. * Practice asking for feedback from others whenever possible. * Practice implementing the learnings each day and validate your assumptions frequently.
Balancing both our self-talk and external feedback is how we get the results we want. It is one of the keys to success and motivation.
How do you define reality? Do you believe in superstitions? E.g. If a cat crosses your path when you are going for an important meeting, do you change direction? Or if someone sneezes just before you leave the house, do you wait for some time before leaving?
Have you challenged any superstitions and found that they weren't applicable all the time? Our beliefs and values determine our reality.
However, The need to be "Right" and fear of failure can create belief systems that contradict what's happening out there in the world. Before Roger Bannister created history by running a mile in less than 4 minutes, everyone believed it was impossible. Once done, within a month, someone else broke his record, and since then, many others have broken the 4-minute mile.
Do you remember that time when people did not believe in your capabilities?
Remember that time when you were sure about yourself and went for a seemingly impossible job and succeeded?
How did you manage that? Why didn't others influence you to stop?
Our Mind creates maps of what we believe is real. These maps are based on our senses, and they easily influence us.
Our wishes, desires, and our need to succeed and learn, can be stronger than the beliefs. We can challenge our belief systems and create new maps aligned with what we want and desire.
Deep down, all of us can create new maps and new beliefs to perform better than yesterday. We can lead ourselves to a better life by taking responsibility and be in charge.
What can you do: * Practice gratitude. Be thankful for your experiences and your beliefs. They have got you here, and their purpose is to support you. * Practice focusing on your future. Only look to your past beliefs and experiences to learn. * Remember that positive and negative emotions are the universe's way of telling you when you are on the right track. * Practice challenging at least one old belief that you may have each day. If they are true, then you learned their purpose. If they were untrue, you learned something new. Life is all about understanding who we are and how we think. So go ahead and create it the way you want, not how you have been made to believe.
Do you have stress? Does it feel good? Remember the last time when you were stressed? How much of your mind did it occupy? Did it take days, weeks or even months for you to get back to normal? Now, remember that time when you did not have any stress? Were you relaxed and thinking clearly? Did you make better decisions? What about that time when you became too relaxed and complacent? Did you make mistakes? Did you miss opportunities you usually wouldn't? A study says that if we don't have stress, then we would not exist. A small amount of tension helps us focus on things that are important to us. We tend to be serious about our work and our lives. The challenge becomes when we overthink. We go too deep into the stressed thinking and start reacting rather than responding. According to renowned author and speaker Nick Hall, Stress is not the main problem. It's our response to stress and our ability to recover from the stress that is the culprit. We can never be stress-free. So, rather than focusing on a life of being stress-free, we should concentrate on practising routines that will help us recover faster. The sooner we can recover, the less we will be impacted by it, and the better our lives can be. So what can we do: * Practice gratitude. When we are thankful for everything we have in our lives, we can deal with stress much better. * Practice being aware of your stress triggers. When they are active, you will become angry, frustrated, sad, fearful, guilty and shameful. * Identify things in your daily routine that help you relax. It could be deep breathing, listening to music, singing, reading etc. * Practice distracting yourself each time a negative thought comes into your mind and replace it with activities that relax you
Our goal in life shouldn't be freedom from stress. Instead, we should focus our energies on recovery and practice routines that keep us relaxed.