Aristotle Asparagus: Recent Episodes
Aristotle Asparagus
This podcast focuses on the life of Aristotle Asparagus, a Greek farmer who grows calypso, a marijuana-like plant that you snort instead of smoke.
After Aristotle talks to his lawyer L. Ron Travolta, a horse farmer and equinophile named Equo Chevalier shows up to discuss his Covid 19 Mystery Drug which definitely is not ivermectin
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Comedian Anthony Atamanuik, known for things like 30 Rock, What We Do in the Shadows, and his Trump impersonation joins Aristotle to discuss his career among other things. Later on, vigilante Sir Dickolas Christopher comes on to talk about his vigilante goal of recalling every governor while chasing after his enemy.
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Actor and comedian Nick Rutherford (Good Neighbor, Saturday Night Live, Rick and Morty, Dreamcorp LLC) joins Aristotle to discuss his origins in the Good Neighbor sketch troupe, what it's like working at SNL, tells us a funny story about one of his Rick and Morty episodes. Later, rapper and yeast of thoughts and mind The Globglogabgalab comes on to discuss his new collab album with Kanye West, "The New Album."
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TV plumber and brother of Errick and Derrick Merrick Shakespeare joins Aristotle and Marian Glink to discuss laying pipe and... and nothing else.
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Notice: I mentioned Rodney Alcala in this episode, the serial killer who was on the Dating Game. He had actually died about 2 hours before I recorded this episode, however I did not know. The mention of him was a total coincidence. . Old enemy L. Ron Travolta returns to Aristotle Asparagus to discuss his firing from AdCorp and his plans to join our side and be our lawyer against AdCorp. AdCorp intern Marian Glink and United States of AdCorp Supreme Court Chief Justice Errick Shakespeare are also here.
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Errick Shakespeare, the brother of underground librarian Derrick Shakespeare and the newly elected Chief Justice of the United States Supreme Court under AdCorpian rule joins Aristotle and AdCorp intern Marian Glink to discuss what he plans to do when presiding over AdCorp v. Asparagus, Glink, Franklin and Spritecan, as well as the help he needs finding 8 replacement justices for AdCorp's new supreme court. However, things go awry when political pundit and supreme adbot Ben Shapiro shows up to threaten death if not chosen as a new justice.
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While Crazy Frog and the other regional managers of AdCorp (Gummibar, Hampton the Hamster, and Mr. Raisin Toast) are busy meeting with Joe Biden about the long planned purchase of the United States, making it a corporate dictatorship, Marian Glink, a reverse financed intern captured by AdCorp frantically serves as substitute CEO of AdCorp, where we find out that Mr. Spritecan was originally part of AdCorp and travel through time to escape Crazy Frog after we get caught escaping from the AdCorp building
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Special guest star Seth Morris (Big Mouth, Comedy Bang Bang) joins Aristotle to discuss his career and the origins of some of his famous CBB characters. Later, Google employee and impresario Tomasso Bergeroni shows up with Crazy Frog, now using a voice modulator that makes him sound like L. Ron Travolta, to discuss Tomasso's new musical based on his own creation, the YouTube channel Webdriver Torso.
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Writer for Duncanville and Young Sheldon Nick Mandernach joins Aristotle to discuss his start as a writer, the work environment for his show, and more. Later, supervillain Crazy Frog shows up accompanied by adbot and lifeguard Ben Rome, who discusses working at a lifeguard at a pool in the middle of nowhere and possibly almost letting a person with a confusing age drown.
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Writer for shows like The Simpsons, Parks and Recreation, New Girl, AP Bio, and Silicon Valley Donick Cary joins Aristotle along with co-hosts L. Ron Travolta and Wink Giamatti to discuss his work on the various shows he did, as well as other stuff like cicadas, the Washington Football Team, and Mochi. Later, supervillain Crazy Frog returns to discuss AdCorp's new product in the line of Crazy Animals, the Crazy Cicada which steals your data, rhyme not intended.
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Commercial star turned musician turned supervillain Crazy Frog invades Aristotle and Set Kamehameha's conversation about Set's growing success selling ass weed to trap the 2 in the AdCorp Building
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Notice: It should be noted that at around the 25-30 minutes in period, a person who called himself "Bobby" (or Bobby Shmurda) came in and I have no idea who the hell it was and neither do the others. It is likely that one of my friends invited him and is good at covering it up, but there's a chance it could be a hacker. In a part not included in this episode, another strange person joined, with a different voice, and despite being called "Sara," it was a male voice. If anybody listening recognizes the voice, let me know immediately. Otherwise, enjoy the show. . Intergalagtic ice cream truck driver Paul Ron joins Aristotle and co-host Set Kamehameha, as well as L. Ron Travolta who joins in later, to discuss his business delivering ice cream across dimensions, as well as meeting otherworldly creatures like gopher versions of American presidents, benevolent versions of malevolent dictators, and different times Abraham Lincoln (who looks much better with a beard) could have died. Later, Paul Ron's voice changes right as Aristotle gets kidnapped and emerald miner and father of a guy named Elon Errol Musk joins us from his emerald mining dimension of which he is the only inhabitant to discuss his shady past, how he feels about his son hosting Saturday Night Live and his plans to infiltrate, and the multitude of lawyers he made out of emeralds.
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Futurama and The Big Bang Theory writer Eric Kaplan joins Aristotle for a half-length episode to discuss his experiences on Futurama and how Andy Richter voiced a lemur.
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Podcast host and comedian Jacquis Neal joins Aristotle and seldom speaking character Benjamin Franklin to discuss his podcasting work and what it's like at Earwolf. Plus, underground librarian and descendant of William Shakespeare Derrick Shakespeare makes his third appearance to discuss the cult L. Ron Travolta started who appear at his library in South Bend, Indiana and how Mayor Pete Buttigieg, a secret alien is involved, as well as his debt to the IRS. Featuring John Jack Daniel Torrence as Aristotle Asparagus, Michael Connahay as Benjamin Franklin, Roman Tewslick as Derrick Shakespeare, and Jacquis Neal as himself.
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In the final episode of season 2, where the Dreamscape is finally vacated after L. Ron Travolta departs the episode midway, Mr. Spritecan returns accompanied by his own mother Rusty Spritecan and learns a dark secret. Later, Aristotle and L. Ron Travolta leave and we are introduced to 2 holiday mascots, the Eadter Bunny who discusses the covid vaccines involved in this year's egg hunt and how the Bible stole Easter from him, while Mr. Spritecan's Jewish mononymous cousin Randall joins as well to discuss what it's like as newly elected mascot of Passover. Featuring John Jack Daniel Torrence as Aristotle Asparagus and the Easter Bunny, Smith Zebulon van Buren as L. Ron Travolta and Randall, Pike Clark as Mr. Spritecan, and Carlson Old as Rusty Spritecan.
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Rejected Looney Tunes character Capybara P. Johnson comes on to discuss how he got rejected from being a major character, what he's been doing in the 8.5 decades since his rejection, and the possibility of a cameo in the new Space Jam movie. Then, Looney Tunes creator Chuck Jones and Looney Tunes voice actor Mel Blanc arrive straight out of the underworld to discuss their plans for a new Underworld exclusive Looney Tunes Cinematic Universe and the film about Marvin the Martian, played by the living but functionally dead Prince Philip, fighting Perseverance, played by Andre the Giant, to start it all. They also discuss the plans for the next film, one about Gossamer. After Mel Blanc leaves, Marvin the Martian himself comes on to discuss his own opinions on the film and Prince Philip makes a quick cameo to not hear anyone.
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In a heavily edited hour-turned half hour, Aristotle switches to a new microphone to talk with St. Patrick himself about how he came back from the dead, his relationships with other saints and prophets, and his new discovery of the holiday celebrated in his honor. After that, first British king William I, aka William the Conqueror, comes on at first to discuss his idea for a royal family and how it differs from the current one before it is discovered that he actually wrote "Puff the Magic Dragon" as a poem that was stolen. In addition, Aristotle's Irish counterpart, a leprechaun from another universe named Aleister O'Spargus comes on to discuss his universe and his business. Featuring John Jack Daniel Torrence as Aristotle Asparagus and Aleister O'Spargus, Smith Zebulon van Buren as St. Patrick and himself, and Benedict Longstocking as William the Conqueror.
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Aristotle Asparagus and Benjamin Franklin are joined by chapstick salesman Johnson I and his son, dentist Johnson II to make edits to the historical tales of Hector Berlioz's relationship with actress Harriet Smithson, and then to talk about serial killer Ted Bundy's escape from a Colorado court house. Featuring John Jack Daniel Torrence as Aristotle Asparagus, Michael Connahay as Benjamin Franklin, Devlin Dante DiMartino as Johnson II, and Pike Clark as Johnson I
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Aristotle, Set, and Benjamin Franklin all join the Russian mafia under the leadership of Yuri Nator, a separate identity of L. Ron Travolta. Featuring John Jack Daniel Torrence as Aristotle Asparagus, Michael Connahay as Benjamin Franklin, and William Edinburgh as Yuri Nator
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