Newborn To Teen and Everything Inbetween: Recent Episodes
Decibelle Creative
Newborn to Teen and Everything Inbetween - it does exactly what it says on the tin! Join childcare experts Becks and Claire for practical advice about how to communicate with children, at all ages.
There can be a lot of pressure to 'get it right' when it comes to children, which can be quite daunting! Whether you’re a parent, a teacher, TA or childcare worker, or just looking to gain a better understanding of the world through a child’s eyes, Becks and Claire have 25 years of childcare experience to share with you. Listen for reassurance and support to help you navigate tricky conversations, challenging behaviour, complex emotions, and the general day to day pressures of raising and working with children.
This is a judgement-free zone - you won't find a one-size-fits-all rule book here! The perfect parent doesn't exist, but in their family consultancy business Bespoke Family, Becks and Claire believe that a child centred approach which recognises and respects individuality is the best way to enable families to thrive. Join Becks and Claire for accessible, light-hearted and well researched advice and guidance on the various ways we can tackle the ups and downs of life with children (they've got a great sense of humour too, so if you love a laugh you're in great company!)
Subscribe to Newborn to Teen and Everything Inbetween - new episodes every fortnight, to help you get the best out of your time with the children in your life.
Find Becks and Claire online at: www.bespokefamily.co.uk / Instagram: @bespokefamily / Search Bespoke Family on Facebook
Content note: This episode includes discussion of mental health deterioration, detention under the Mental Health Act and the impact of the COVID-19 pandemic on Ewen and his family.
In this episode, we are joined by Ruby, the creator of @ewenandme, to talk about her experience of growing up alongside her older brother, Ewen.
Ewen is 24, autistic and non-speaking, with significant support needs. To Ruby, however, he has always simply been Ewen — her big brother, her best friend and one of the most important people in her life.
Ruby explains why she started the Ewen and Me Instagram account in 2022. Born partly from frustration at the lack of understanding surrounding siblings of disabled people, the account gives Ruby a space to share both the joy and the reality of their relationship.
Ruby talks openly about growing up “in Ewen’s shadow”, sometimes feeling left out and learning from an early age to compromise and adapt around his needs. Although her parents worked hard to ensure that Ruby had her own identity and she never felt let down by them, family life inevitably required sacrifices.
We also discuss the closeness Ruby and Ewen share. Ruby can instinctively recognise when Ewen is happy and often understands him without words, but it can be much harder to know what he wants or needs. Ewen previously communicated using PECS — the Picture Exchange Communication System — but has since become increasingly reliant on prompts and more isolated within himself. Ruby describes the family’s wish for him to be able to communicate more independently.
When Ewen was ten, he began attending a residential school, returning home at weekends. He later moved into residential care. During the COVID-19 pandemic, separation from his family had a devastating effect on him. Ruby speaks movingly about the deterioration in Ewen’s mental health, his detention under the Mental Health Act and the enormous toll this period took on the whole family.
Ewen now lives in his own home with a dedicated care team, somewhere Ruby says he loves.
Ruby also reflects on what she needed from the people around her while growing up. School became a vital source of support, particularly one teacher who gave her the time, care and acknowledgement she needed. She explains how isolating life can feel for siblings and why a friend, teacher or trusted adult simply recognising what is happening can make a huge difference.
We hear about some of the things Ruby missed out on or had to leave early because Ewen needed her, from holidays with friends to nights out and even a date. Ruby explains that, in some ways, becoming an adult sibling has been harder than being Ewen’s little sister, as questions about responsibility, care and the future become more prominent.
Her experiences have also shaped her career. Ruby now works in a caring role within the community and supports Jude, the son of the creator of @storiesaboutautism, with whom she has developed a close and natural friendship. She feels that she often connects more easily with neurodivergent people than with neurotypical people.
Ruby speaks honestly about sharing the harder parts of life online and dealing with cruel comments from people who may feel uncomfortable seeing the full reality of disability and family life. Although her relationship with Ewen is beautiful and full of love, she is clear that it can also be incredibly difficult - and that both things can be true at once.
Her advice to other siblings is not to be too hard on themselves. Siblings should recognise what they are carrying, find someone they can trust and give themselves permission to talk honestly about their worries and feelings.
As Ruby says, sometimes the only way to get through something is simply to keep going - and for her, the motivation has always been Ewen.
Follow us:
Instagram: @bespokefamily
Facebook: @bespokefamily
Follow Ruby and Ewen:
Instagram: @ewenandme
Further support
Sibs is the UK charity supporting brothers and sisters of disabled children and adults. Visit: sibs.org.uk
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation, click here
Explore our downloadable Your Guide to… webinars, covering topics including preparing for and welcoming your newborn, behaviour, toilet training and sleep - click here
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative.
That heart-in-mouth moment when your little one suddenly bolts is something so many parents recognise. One minute they are beside you, the next they have spotted freedom, space, excitement - and they are off.
In this episode, we explore what is really going on when children run away from us, and why it often happens just as they are beginning to feel more confident and independent. From a child’s perspective, they have spent much of their early life being moved, carried, lifted and guided from place to place. Then suddenly they discover they can move themselves, and running feels exciting, powerful and freeing.
We talk about the sensory pull of movement, space and exploration, and why young children do not yet have the same sense of danger or safety that adults do. That is why our role is not just to stop them running, but to help them gradually learn how to manage freedom safely.
Claire shares practical ways to build safety awareness from an early age, including how clear and simple our explanations need to be, why role modelling matters so much, and how games like “Red Light, Green Light”, “What’s the Time Mr Wolf?” and “freeze and go” can help children practise stopping and listening in a playful way.
We also reminisce about the Tufty Club, the Green Cross Code and the old road safety campaigns many of us grew up with, and discuss why teaching road safety now sits even more firmly with parents and carers.
The episode also covers what to do when your child refuses to hold your hand, how to make boring walks more engaging, and how reins or wrist links can be used calmly and positively when needed. Claire also shares her top tip for how impactful our reaction can be in the moment, especially when we feel frightened or cross.
For families who are really struggling, we talk about how a reward chart might support this learning, and how to approach safety when you are out and about with more than two little ones. We have a blog on reward charts here
As always, this episode is about understanding children’s behaviour, setting boundaries and helping our little ones learn the skills they need to stay safe while still building confidence and independence.
Helpful reminder
Running off is not usually about being “naughty”. It is often about curiosity, excitement, impulse and a child’s developing sense of independence. With calm, clear boundaries and lots of practice, children can gradually learn how to stay safe while still enjoying the freedom to explore.
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Facebook @bespokefamily
Our blog -
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including preparing for and welcoming your newborn, behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
In this episode, we’re talking all about keeping your cool when your child loses theirs - much easier said than done!
We explore why staying calm in the middle of a meltdown can feel so difficult, especially when the little things have been building up, you’re already feeling stressed, or the day you had planned simply isn’t going the way you hoped.
Becks shares honestly about how her mum never kept her cool (and how Becks hasn’t always kept hers either!) We talk about the fact that no parent can stay calm 100% of the time. It’s just not possible. Sometimes people may look like they’re coping from the outside, but we never really know what is going on underneath.
We also discuss how hard it can feel when everyone seems to have an opinion, especially when your child is having a difficult moment in public, or when social media makes it look as though everyone else has it all together - calm parents, calm children, and no meltdowns in sight.
Claire talks about the importance of having a toolkit of things to try when emotions are running high, including simple strategies you can use yourself and with your children. These are the kinds of ideas you can pin on the fridge or save on your phone, so they’re easy to reach for when you need them most.
We look at how you can try to bring your child’s chaos down with your calm, rather than matching their chaos with your own and escalating things further. We also talk about recognising your own triggers, trying to understand your child’s triggers, and how different situations, including Claire’s experiences with her mum’s dementia, can bring up big feelings in us too.
There’s also an honest conversation about what happens afterwards: the guilt, the beating yourself up, and the importance of repair. Losing your cool doesn’t mean you’ve failed, but coming back together afterwards really matters.
Finally, we talk about accepting help when it’s offered. So many of us find this hard, but it really does take a village to raise a child. And if you’re the friend offering help, sometimes just doing something practical can make all the difference.
We hope this episode gives you some reassurance, some practical ideas, and a reminder that you are not alone in finding these moments hard.
Instagram @bespokefamily
Facebook @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here
‘Your Guide to...’ — our downloadable webinars including preparing for and welcoming your newborn, behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
In this episode, we’re talking all about hayfever in children - how it can affect them, how tricky it can be to spot, and how to help manage hayfever symptoms during pollen season.
We explore just how unpleasant hayfever can be for little ones, from feeling generally unwell and tired to dealing with a wide range of symptoms. Because younger children can’t always explain how they’re feeling, it can be difficult to know whether it’s just a cold or hayfever. We talk through the common hayfever symptoms in children, including sneezing (very common for Becks!), runny nose, coughing, itchy, watery or red eyes, headaches, earaches, tiredness, and that itchy or scratchy throat that may be described by little ones as a sore throat.
We also discuss how hayfever symptoms can vary day to day, and how different types of pollen affect children at different times of year - tree pollen in spring, grass pollen in summer (often worse during harvest time), and weed pollen in autumn.
Antihistamines can help relieve hayfever symptoms, but we touch on how they may still cause drowsiness in some children - something to be mindful of, especially when they may already be feeling run down. If your child has more severe hayfever, we highlight the importance of speaking to a GP or pharmacist for advice and support.
Claire also shares some simple, practical tips for managing hayfever in children and helping them feel more comfortable during high pollen days.
With hayfever season approaching, we hope this episode gives you helpful, realistic ways to support your child through it.
Instagram @bespokefamily
Facebook @bespokefamily
Our Hayfever blog – My child has hayfever, what can I do to help?
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including preparing for and welcoming your newborn, behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Trigger warning: In this episode we talk about birth trauma and Hannah’s personal experience of this. If you don’t feel ready to listen right now, please take care of yourself and come back when the time feels right 💛
In this episode, we’re joined by Hannah, who we first met when she was a student at Norland College. Hannah shares her experience of the traumatic birth of her daughter, and why she feels so strongly about raising awareness and supporting other parents who may be going through something similar.
We talk about the importance of having someone to advocate for you during pregnancy and birth, and what can happen when that support isn’t there. Hannah reflects on her experience in hospital, the moments and interactions that have stayed with her, and how it felt to meet her daughter for the first time in NICU. She also shares the ongoing impact once they returned home, from feeling overlooked and unsupported, to navigating continued concerns and ‘red flags’ in her baby’s care.
We also explore how birth trauma doesn’t always end when you leave the hospital. Hannah opens up about the time it took to for her to realise she needed to seek support, finally doing so through her GP, the emotional toll it had on her relationships, and the difficult decision-making process when considering having another baby, including the support she received from a birth trauma therapist.
This conversation highlights how important it is that parents feel heard, supported and cared for and raises important questions about how maternity services can better support families. Hannah also shares her thoughts on the need for greater awareness of birth trauma and why she is supporting calls for maternity reform.
Hannah talked to us about a petition currently circulating around maternity reform. This is being debated on 20 April 2026 and, if you are listening before the deadline of 7 July 2026, she (and we) would urge you to sign it.
Sign the petition here
Instagram @bespokefamily
Facebook @bespokefamily
Our podcast episode (September 2025) with Trudi Webber from Make Birth Better, was all about what birth trauma is, how it can happen along with tips for looking after yourself emotionally when preparing for, during and after birth – you can listen to this episode here
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including preparing for and welcoming your newborn, behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Claire wasn’t a really sicky child (Becks was!) but she has a phobia of sick so this was a great topic for her!!
We talked about:
- Sickness bugs (aren’t they a gift..!) and some tips to help.
- Getting sick off a carpet – use shaving foam!
- Sick phobias and parenting – it's a real thing.
- Dehydration – the signs to look for.
- How children should be 48 hours clear before going back to nursery or school and why (and no swimming for 2 weeks). They will probably tell nursery anyway!!
- Foods to help with recuperation.
- Triggers for sickness and how they can continue (think of that drink that made you sick 😉)
- How sickness bugs creep up on you with no warning – you just have to go with it (but make sure you are ready with a sick bowl, kitchen roll and marigolds!)!
Always remember to seek medical advice (GP, Pharmacist or 111) if you are worried.
Instagram @bespokefamily
Facebook @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including preparing for and welcoming your newborn, behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
A topic that we are contacted about quite regularly – we absolutely expect broken sleep in the first months, and then sleep is really good (whatever that means to us) then it starts to change and feels like it’s all gone wrong...
- Don’t panic! - we talk about all the things that could be impacting this and the possible reasons why sleep has changed.
- How illness can impact on children’s sleep and how to get back to a routine that suits you with the least amount of upset.
- Feeling scared and how this can affect sleep (we have some blogs on how to help with this).
- Situations when little ones are disturbed because they are practicing things like crawling, rolling, babbling etc.
- How routines (daytime and bedtime) can affect sleep.
- Sleep associations – whatever children go to sleep with they will look for it to help settle them back off in the night when they wake up.
- Treating it like a puzzle and the importance of taking notes so you can see any patterns.
- How nothing is unfixable and everything is sortable (and we are here to help with a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation if you need it!)!
Our sleep blogs - https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/blog/category/Sleep
Instagram @bespokefamily
Facebook @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including preparing for and welcoming your newborn, behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
When / why do children become more fussy? We spoke about the neophobic stage (which goes right back to when we were cave people!) as well as other reasons why babies and children might be choosy about food.
- What happens when panic sets in and our children refuse to eat?
- Some tips to help children with learning about what they like and portion control.
- Offering alternatives?
- Watching our children eat “please just try it!!!”and how it feels for them.
- How the neophobic stage is also the ‘terrible twos’ stage.
- ‘Tricking’ / bribing children to get them to eat.
- Did Claire’s dad buy cabbage for tea! Of course he did 😉!
- How important it is for children to be sitting in a position where their back and feet are supported to eat comfortably and well.
- Sweet and savoury – puddings, how we are conditioned from childhood, building good food habits.
Our food and weaning blogs - https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/blog/category/Food+and+weaning
Instagram @bespokefamily
Facebook @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including preparing for and welcoming your newborn, behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
We started the conversation by acknowledging that some adults don’t necessarily show much affection even though they are very caring people and children are the same.
We spoke about:
- How there is nothing better than a lovely cuddle from a child and it can feel difficult when a child doesn’t necessarily want this from us.
- The other ways that children show affection to us.
- The importance of never expecting children to give hugs or show physical affection
- 5 Love Languages – how physical touch isn’t always the most important to fulfil children’s affection.
- Quality time and the importance of this to children.
- Being the ‘preferred parent’
Our blog - Why doesn't my child show much affection?
Instagram @bespokefamily Facebook @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including preparing for and welcoming your newborn, behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
There are swear words in this episode so please make sure that little ears aren’t listening 🙉 ...!
This episode is all about when your child, all of a sudden, says a swear word (or something they think is a swear word!) and what you can do about it. We spoke about:
- How sometimes in families where there is so much swearing that the children don’t actually swear!
- Overuse of swear words and how much more it is heard on a day to day basis now (including in songs on the radio and as graffiti!! - Claire has a funny story about this 😬).
- When children take you by surprise with a swear word!
- When children copy us 🫣!!
- How children love making people laugh and how it can be confusing when we then change our reaction from laughing to saying "no don’t say that!". Ways we can react instead.
- What to say when children ask what a swear word means 😳.
- Some of Claire’s funny experiences of children swearing in nursery!
- When children get older and use swear words.
Instagram @bespokefamily
Read our blog on this topic here – How to handle children using swear words!
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including preparing for and welcoming your newborn, behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
This episode is all about looking after children when they are feeling under the weather and the bugs that they bring home from nursery and school (how is it that we sometimes feel so much worse than they do?!).
We talked about lots of things you can do to help little ones feel better and more comfortable as well as:
- The time of year that children tend to get more bugs (or whether that’s really a thing).
- The chickenpox vaccine and what this means for babies, children and families.
- Hygiene – washing hands, hand sanitiser, keeping toys clean etc.
- Temperatures – what is a high temperature and how do you get it down?
- When you shouldn’t give Ibuprofen.
- The medicine box / cupboard and what should be in it.
- Keeping hydrated.
- When a baby has a temperature or isn’t well.
- The importance of not randomly Googling! How you should always refer to the NHS or call 111 for answers / guidance.
- First Aid training and how helpful this can be.
- Tips for when children are coughing (including some old wives tales!) and the nasal aspirator (snot sucker!).
- Changing habits and routines and how to re-introduce them when the child is feeling better.
NHS Apps:
Handi App The HANDi app offers simple and straightforward advice, for the following conditions in children:
- diarrhoea and vomiting
- high temperature
- ‘chesty baby’ illnesses, such as bronchiolitis, asthma and croup
- ‘chesty child’ illnesses, such as wheezing and asthma
- common newborn problems
- tummy pain
- head injuries.
The Healthier Together App
Similar to HANDi, it uses a symptom checker to guide parents on whether to treat at home, seek GP advice, or attend emergency services.
Instagram @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including preparing for and welcoming your newborn, behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Steph told us all about Mudpies and Sprinkles and how it began. It’s an outdoor play space for children (and Becks waxed lyrical about it!) - Steph’s love for watching children enjoying different elements of play really shone through.
Steph hasn’t got any formal training and learnt what worked along the way and through her own children.
We talked about:
- Things you can do when you are outside (even just being at the park)
- All of the different areas in Mudpies and Sprinkles and why there are there (eg an old phone, a sewing machine etc!)
- Sparking curiosity in children and the importance of making things inviting for children to want to engage and play with
- Steph’s favourite areas at Mudpies and Sprinkles (and why!)
- Children with additional needs and how this kind of outdoor play area can help to support them
- How when we were younger that being outside and making mud pies was what we did!
- How there’s no such thing as bad weather, just bad clothes!
- The importance of letting children make their own play and keeping it open ended
- Following your child’s lead and not worrying about ‘doing it right’!
Instagram @bespokefamily / @Mudpies_and_sprinkles
Mudpies and Sprinkles website
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including preparing for and welcoming your newborn, behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Becks’s children both cried when they were dropped off at nursery so she knows exactly how this feels and Claire has lots and lots of experiences of children crying at drop off as a nursery manager.
We talked about:
- How there are always going to be children who don’t like the separation moment; as Claire explains 9 times out of 10 they will be OK when you have left (but they might also cry when you pick them up).
- Separation anxiety – how this can coincide with the age that children start to go to nursery.
- Days and times of the week they are left – how these can be difficult for children to understand (especially Mondays!)
- Other reasons children might be unsettled on drop off and how change can have a huge impact on how settled children are.
- How it’s important to trust the childcare professional and what they say about how your children are.
- Letting your children know it’s OK to feel sad and knowing that you are building resilience.
- Some ideas for things you can do to help make the separation a little easier.
- How it is important to always say goodbye and not sneak off (but don’t drag it out!).
- If your child is upset all day, then this is a different thing and how you should always talk to someone at the nursery in more detail about it.
Blog – My child always cries when I drop them at nursery
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including preparing for and welcoming your newborn, behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
Facebook @bespokefamily
Instagram @bespokefamily
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Unfortunately, Claire’s wifi wasn’t playing ball again in this episode, but Becks had a great chat with Catherine and this is what we talked about!
- Where the idea for Hygge sheets came from.
- Different ways night time dryness / potty training / wetting etc. are referred to.
- How Hygge sheets work.
- How you can tell when a child is ready to be dry at night.
- What Catherine suggests you do when your little one is upset when they have had an accident.
- The dream wee – yes or no?
- Talking through what happens and what to do when your children wake up in the night to go for a wee (night lights etc).
- When children are older and wetting the bed.
- Reward charts – why aren’t they helpful?
- What Catherine wishes all parents knew about bed wetting.
Facebook @bespokefamily / @hygge_supplies
Instagram @bespokefamily / @hygge.sheets
Hygge Sheets website
ERIC website
Blog –When should my child be dry at night?
Podcast – Nighttime Dryness
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including preparing for and welcoming your newborn, behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
In this our 100th episode! We talked about:
- The importance of the transition from nursery / school to home but also for us going from work to home (especially if you are working from home!).
- How you can’t always be your ‘true self’, how things build up and how we have to hold it together when you aren’t at home and it comes out when you get home.
- Some ideas for what you can do to decompress before getting home.
- Connection before redirection – a few tweaks to the routine or some pre preparation can make a difference to coming home time.
- Not necessarily asking lots of questions when children come out of school or nursery.
- There may be particular triggers and worries that prompt behaviour and these are things that you might need to look into and support them further.
- How you sometimes just need to allow your children let it out when they get home.
- Keeping our calm.
Facebook @bespokefamily
Instagram @bespokefamily
Blog – 10 ways to help tricky behaviour after school / How to help your child prepare for starting school / How do I keep calm when my little one is having a meltdown?
Podcast – Starting school / Preparing children for nursery
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including preparing for and welcoming your newborn, behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
We know that for many families, birth doesn’t always go the way you hoped or imagined, and it can leave a lasting impact. In this episode, we spoke with Trudi about what birth trauma really means, why antenatal education is so important, and how parents can prepare for and recover from challenging experiences.
Unfortunately in this episode Claire’s internet gave up the ghost and so Becks had to go it alone (Claire never usually let’s that happen!) - we hope that this doesn’t spoil your enjoyment of the episode in any way 😊.
- Trudi began by telling us all about herself and her background (she used to be a chartered accountant!) and why she came to be involved in Make Birth Better.
- What birth trauma is, how common it is and what stages it can happen at. Links with depression and PTSD etc.
- Signs that might indicate birth trauma (eg avoidance of certain settings, appointments etc) along with statistics around birth trauma and PTSD.
- Becks talked about her own birth experience (19 years ago!) and how a debrief of the experience she and her husband had would have been really welcome and helpful.
- The importance of keeping lines of communication open.
- Antenatal education and preparation.
- How a birth partner can support before and during birth, but that birth can have an impact on them as well.
- ‘Birth trauma is in the eye of a beholder’ – Cheryl Beck – how every experience is valid and any birth can be traumatic.
- The process for post birth ‘de-briefs’.
- What Trudi would say to expectant parents who are anxious about giving birth.
- Compassionate care and support – at the heart of our maternity services.
- Tips for looking after yourself emotionally preparing for, during and after giving birth.
Facebook @bespokefamily / https://www.facebook.com/birthbetter
Instagram @bespokefamily / https://www.instagram.com/birthbetter
Make Birth Better website - https://www.makebirthbetter.org/
You may also be interested in our Hypnobirthing episode – listen here
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including preparing for and welcoming your newborn, behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Not liking their new sibling isn’t necessarily a personal thing against the baby but this is a huge change and impact on a little one’s life. This episode is all about why this is and what you can do to help.
We spoke about:
- How a 2 or 3 year old is going to find the arrival of a new little baby coming a very difficult concept to grasp and it's also going to be a big adjustment for the parents!
- The range of emotions that come with having a new baby.
- The importance of not forcing the relationship between the new siblings and why.
- Connection, consistency and keeping boundaries.
- Considering if the resistance might be because of any big changes for your little one before baby was born.
- Thinking about what's happening from your little one’s perspective and working from that.
- The life lessons that the children are learning from being a sibling.
Our blog from this episide – https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/blog/why-doesnt-my-toddler-like-their-new-sibling
Facebook @bespokefamily
Instagram @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Clare’s background has always been in early years - she is founder of Atelier nurseries which started in Bath and is now also in Chippenham in Wiltshire
Lots of parents worry about starting their children at nursery and we knew that Clare was the ideal person to talk to us about it all – we covered so much, from choosing the right nursery, to settling in, drop off and what families can do to help little ones to prepare.
We spoke about:
- What parents typically worry about when taking children to nursery for the first time.
- How it is completely normal to feel worried and anxious.
- Routines and consistency and how this will be carried over from home life to nursery.
- The impact that nursery practitioners can have on families’ lives (and how that can last way beyond nursery!).
- Relationships that are built with and between children and families.
- Preparing children for nursery (both you and your little one(s)).
- What to look for when choosing a nursery.
- Settling in sessions and what these can look like.
- No guilt about going back to work and making it work for you and your family – finding the right nursery provider for you.
- Crying at nursery drop off – working with families and the nursery to see what’s happening. Pausing, reflecting, communicating and having a plan.
- What you can do to help preparing children for starting nursery at home.
- Clare’s tips to help prepare children for nursery
Our blogs – Choosing childcare that is right for you and your child / My child always cries when I drop them at nursery
Atelier Nursery website: https://www.ateliernursery.co.uk/
Facebook @bespokefamily @AtelierNursery
Instagram @bespokefamily @ateliernurseryltd
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
When most of the time, the children you are potty training are toddlers, no wonder there are power struggles – and we are always asked about what to do when this happens!
We spoke about:
- The most common potty training power struggles.
- Starting by trying to work out where the struggle is coming from – could it be a feeling of being out of control?
- Positive reinforcement and connection when they do something on the potty or toilet (more than when they don’t do it!)
- Rewards (or not?)
- The importance of consistency of approach.
- Our other potty training blogs and podcast episodes!
- Whether it’s a good idea to stop and start again straight away or if it’s better to leave it for a bit before starting again.
- The importance of not nagging children so they can think for themselves and don’t become oblivious to what you are saying when you ask them if they need to go for a wee.
- How to exercise the bladder – “stretch, hold, release!”
- Why it’s important not to not to leave your child on the potty or toilet for too long.
- Precautionary wees and why these aren’t necessarily a good idea! Teaching children skills for life.
Our blogs – When potty training is a power struggle / Potty Training Regression – Is it normal? / Why won’t my child do a poo on the toilet or potty?
Facebook @bespokefamily
Instagram @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
SWEDA is a charity which supports people in the South and West of England who are affected by an eating disorder – the individual, friends, family member – anyone who is affected by food, eating or body image.
We spoke about:
- Hannah’s background, how SWEDA was set up and the work that it does.
- How SWEDA can support neurodivergent children and young people and the links between autism and eating disorders in particular.
- What eating disorders can do to people’s physical and mental / social state of being.
- Signs that might indicate your child has an eating disorder and how it can feel like having a constant bully in the room with you.
- How SWEDA can support children and young people with sensory issues and anxiety around eating and food.
- What to do if parents are worried their child might have an eating disorder and how SWEDA can support children, young people and families.
- How to approach things when you are worried about an eating disorder, what to say in these circumstances and how best to support your child (and you).
- How to explain eating disorders to people who might not understand that it is an illness and what your child is going through.
- How to approach things when children and young children are picky eaters – keeping mealtimes as stress free as possible and finding things that work for your child.
- How eating disorders affect different genders.
- What Hannah would say to parents who are worried about their child.
SWEDA’s website - https://swedauk.org/
Facebook @bespokefamily / SWEDA
Instagram @bespokefamily / sweda_uk_org
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
A continuation of our chat about weaning...the food aspect!
We spoke about:
- Having a book for weaning.
- Trying not to worry about it and to try and enjoy it.
- Baby’s facial expressions (and our reactions to these!).
- How to regulate the feeding and make it a social situation even from the very first taste.
- Keeping it positive - we are teaching babies skills for life.
- Not tricking children into eating food!
- ‘Eating up’!
- The kinds of foods your babies can eat.
- Pouches – an element of caution…
- Sugar and grazing!
- Using meal times for connection.
Our blog – Weaning fun...don't let it be stressful!
BBC investigation into pouches https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c62j0l0gg4go
Charlotte Stirling Reed - https://www.srnutrition.co.uk/
Weaning books
Facebook @bespokefamily
Instagram @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Georgie is a Norland nanny and Claire was her tutor at college! Georgie has 15 years of childcare experience and is now a mum to two little ones. Georgie has a boy and a girl. She now runs hypnobirthing classes for parents to be.
We spoke about:
- What hypnobirthing is.
- How Georgie came to train in hypnobirthing.
- Having a baby in lockdown.
- How your mind is the biggest inhibitor when it comes to birth and how hypnobirthing helps to still this.
- The fear, tension, pain cycle.
- Birth stories, how they can impact and how hypnobirthing can help.
- The importance of birth partners when learning breathing techniques.
- How pain relief features with hypnobirthing.
- Georgie’s own experience of hypnobirthing when she had her babies.
- Birth plans and the importance of an open mind around the experience.
- When the hypnobirthing process startsand it works?
- Using the breathing techniques beyond birth.
Rosebud Hypnobirthing - https://www.rosebudhypnobirthing.com/
Facebook @bespokefamily / Rosebud Hypnobirthing
Instagram @bespokefamily / @rosebud_hypnobirthing
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Do they ever listen?! From toddlers to teens - this episode covers it all!
We spoke about:
- What we mean by truly listening.
- How it makes us feel when we aren’t listened to.
- Why it is that children might not listen?
- The concept of time for toddlers (and for teens!) - it just isn’t something they are aware of and how it needs to be learnt / re-learnt.
- How all children CAN suddenly listen (usually when you don’t want them to!)!
- Evolving parenting and how your approach changes along with your communication style as your children grow and mature.
- Top tips if you are always feeling frustrated that your children aren’t listening to you.
- How children mirror us.
- How to handle situations when your child says no!
Our blog – How do I get my child to listen to me?
Facebook @bespokefamily
Instagram @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including
behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Trigger warning – in today’s episode we discuss suicide, mental health struggles, cancer and depression with Grace. You might not feel up to listening to this episode right now – if not, please take care and come back when you feel ready.
Grace is a therapist and best-selling author of children’s books, which are all based on Grace's therapy sheep who inspire her and those she helps. Grace’s aim is to spread messages of hope and positivity to children (aged 5-10) through her books; she wants to help them navigate complex emotions and help them to understand themselves better, all while giving parents a way of talking to their children about their feelings. Grace is an animal lover and has been featured on Channel 5’s The Yorkshire Vet.
We spoke with Grace about:
- Her background and the work she does with her horses and sheep (TV stars of The Yorkshire vet!).
- The stories behind her books about her magical sheep - Merlin, Galahad and Berel.
- Her animals, their personalities (favourite biscuits!) and their healing power.
- The therapy work that Grace does with adults and children and how it happened.
- How horses cured Grace’s post-natal depression.
- How Grace wants to help children and teenagers through mental health struggles and how she herself had struggled from a very young age.
- The instant gratification and constant dopamine hits provided by it and how easily accessible information is.
- How children and adults are helped with regulation and a sense of calm by animals and being outside.
- How Grace works with the Yorkshire vet (and sheep agility!!)
Grace’s website - https://www.graceolsonauthor.com/
Instagram @bespokefamily / @grace_olson_author
Facebook @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
The holidays are approaching, and we are talking about jet lag and motion sickness!
We spoke about:
The challenges of travelling with children.
Jet lag / time differences – what jet lag is and how to prepare for it.
Flight times / length – what's best?
Routines when travelling.
What to take that will help.
Travel sickness and why we get it.
Vehicle motion cues on the iphone / ipad! Check out our reel to set this up for your journey.
Signs of motions sickness in children.
Triggers for motions sickness – smells etc.
Tips for how to help prevent motion sickness.
Things to take with you when travelling!
Getting rid of the smell (baking soda and white vinegar are life savers!).
Our jet lag blog – How do I help my baby / child with jet lag?
Our motion sickness blog – Travel or motion sickness
Facebook @bespokefamily
Instagram @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Louisa, our lovely listener, got in touch to ask us to record a podcast on how best to support children and young people who are preparing for exams and so here it is!
We spoke with Will Petty from Bonas MacFarlane Education all about this. Will is so easy to listen to and had some fabulous stories and tips to help our young people manage exam stress.
Will has been with Bonas MacFarlane since 2009, advising countless families from around the world on gaining places at leading UK independent schools. His expertise has been sought after by prestigious firms including UBS, Coutts, and Sotheby’s. Will originally started as a tutor himself so has seen exam stress first hand with students and we felt very lucky that he agreed to share his extensive knowledge with us!
We talked with Will about:
- Not adding to the pressure your children are already feeling!
- Not going on holiday in the Easter holidays...(too late if you are there, but one for next year’s students!).
- Making sure there are time off days (especially if you have a really studious child) and how to plan this and the dreaded revision timetable.
- Not trying to be teacher and parent (be a parent as much as possible) and the benefits of a private tutor if budget permits.
- Focussing as a parent on your child/ren’s wellbeing and not putting your own emotions and pressures on to them – being the safe space they need.
- The importance of the last parent’s evening before the exams (and trying to make sure your child is as well).
- How having treats is really important to ‘take the lid off the pressure cooker’.
- Options for additional support.
- Ignoring the little Timmys..!!
- Wills top 3 tips for parenting during the exam periods.
- All about Bonas Macfarlane and how they support students and families with tuition and more.
Bonas MacFarlane’s website: https://bonasmacfarlane.co.uk/en/
Instagram @bespokefamily / @bonasmacfarlane_
Facebook @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Our lovely listener Jacqueline messaged us with the topic of only children as a podcast idea and here we are!
We talked about:
- One and done – why more families are choosing to have just one child or more than one child.
- Only child stats from Canada - https://www.bbc.co.uk/worklife/article/20230110-only-child-or-siblings-one-and-done
- Becks and Rich initially just wanting one child (and ending up with twins!).
- Other reasons families might make the decision to only have 1 child.
- Claire – the reason everyone should only have 1 child 😉
- An article about only children on BBC science - https://www.sciencefocus.com/science/only-children
- Our thoughts on whether only children are spoilt?
- Reasons people might think parents should have more than 1 child.
Jacqueline – next time someone asks you if you are going to have another child – get them to listen to our podcast!
Get in touch if you have a topic you’d like us to talk about!
Instagram @bespokefamily
Facebook @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
We talked about:
- Davina’s background and how she came to write her book (details below)
- Davina’s own interest in allergies and her award-winning baking background!
- Whether we are seeing an increase in allergies in both adults and children and why this is.
- Parental anxieties around allergies and how to help with this.
- How it's important that children learn to advocate for themselves.
- How knowledge is key to help with parental anxiety around allergies and also to educate your child about their allergies.
- Allergy awareness when out and about and how trust in the restaurants etc is very important.
- Bullying and allergies and some things to do in order to help keep your child safe.
- The importance of support groups online.
Have you ever seen a bee with hives? A book about allergies for everyone from age 8 to 80!
Davina’s recommendation – Dr Helen Allergy
Instagram @bespokefamily
Facebook @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
We talked about:
- Whether we remember having any nightmares or night terrors (Becks had quite the pre-sleep routine!)
- Claire’s dreams (poor James!!)
- The differences between nightmare and night terrors and what happens
- Why someone might have a night terror and why you shouldn’t wake them up
- Nightmares (what these look like and when they happen) and vivid dreams (Claire’s dad calling the cows in for example!!)
- When you would get night terrors checked by the GP
- Things you can do to help prevent nightmares / night terrors
- How nightmares can be caused by trauma
- When to talk with your children about worries
Our Amazon store (for books and worry / sleep things!) - https://www.amazon.co.uk/shop/bespokefamily
Our blog – Is my child having a nightmare or a night terror?
I’m scared – another episode you might enjoy / find useful!
Instagram @bespokefamily
Facebook @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
*In this episode we discuss suicide and depression - if these are tricky subjects for you then please do look after yourself and maybe skip today's episode or listen when you feel ready.***
This episode with Laura is very emotional and insightful one, with moments of humour - we hope you enjoy it. We spoke with Laura about:
- Her situation now as a single mum with 2 children, sharing their care with her ex-husband.
- What happened when Laura became pregnant with Arthur, the birth (by c-section) and coming home.
- The moment she decided she didn’t want to leave the house and a few days later when she decided the solution would be to end her life.
- How her feelings were towards Arthur and when she told her friend how she felt.
- The series of thoughts that went through her head and how she would live hour by hour.
- How she felt like a fraud when the doctor told her she needed help (and ongoing!).
- The round the clock care she received before being supported by the peri-natal mental health team, suicidal thoughts and then how she agreed to be admitted to a mother and baby unit.
- Laura’s experience of being in the unit (she was there for 3 months).
- The different types of postnatal depression and how dads can have post-natal depression too.
- Why Laura wrote the book and what post-natal depression looks like.
- The ongoing support Laura received.
- Getting pregnant the second time, what that meant and how it felt when she had Willow.
- Routine and how it can help.
- How important a support system is.
You can buy Laura’s book on Amazon here (and in all good bookshops) -
Places to get support - Association for Post-Natal Illness / PANDAS FOUNDATION UK
Instagram @cantylaura @bespokefamily
Facebook @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
This episode is for parents and carers who are thinking about starting weaning. We talked about:
- When you should start weaning and the guidelines for this.
- What weaning is.
- The signs to look for to know if your baby is ready to start weaning.
- The fact that sleep changes and that this is more likely to be a 4 month sleep regression than that they are hungry and need to be weaned.
- What to start children on (baby rice is not necessarily the right answer!) and the different methods that can be followed to start weaning.
- Choking and the associated worries.
- The difference between gagging and choking (do a parent first aid course)- we have a podcast episode on this – First Aid Emergencies with Sian Stephanie
- The best sitting position for babies when weaning and beyond.
- The importance of role modelling.
- Things you need to buy or think about before starting weaning.
- The faces babies make!!
- Allergies and what to be aware of.
- Pouches, homemade food (and porridge!).
- What if you hate certain foods?? (spoiler alert – you need to put a brave face on!!)
- What shouldn’t you feed children under 12 months old?
- Following social media accounts (shout out to Charlotte @SRNurition !)
Instagram @bespokefamily
Facebook @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
We started by speaking to Louise all about her background including extensive experience in E-Commerce and the moment GoHenry came to be (she blames her kids who clicked rather alot on iPod downloads!)!
We also talked about:
- GoHenry’s founding aim to increase confidence to use and understand money in what was an increasingly cashless environment.
- What GoHenry is and how it works.
- How GoHenry helps with financial education with their ‘money missions’ on the App
- Where the name GoHenry came from (such a lovely story!).
- How to help children learn about the concepts of money from a young age.
- Claire and Becks’s own attitudes to money and how it’s spoken about in our households.
- How GoHenry is working hard to get financial education introduced as part of the national curriculum to EVERY child.
- Question from our listener, Jason - should children be educated about the stock market and investing from a young age? Louise’s biggest regret is that noone spoke to her about it!
- The effects of a cashless society and how to help children understand worth. How GoHenry can help with this.
- How Louise’s children are with money now!
Instagram @bespokefamily / GoHenry
Facebook @bespokefamily / GoHenry
GoHenry website – https://www.gohenry.com/uk/
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
We chatted about:
- What spending quality time with your children means (Becks googled it!)
- The fact that it doesn’t need to be endless amounts of time and that quality not quantity is what counts.
- How quality time is different for everyone, but that in the main though it is 1:1 interaction and communication, no phones or devices, just being focussed on each other.
- How quality time doesn't have to be something specific like a board game, it can be just doing something with your children and chatting with them as you do it. You don’t even have to be creative!
- How mirroring your child’s play can help if you aren’t sure how to spend the time with your child.
- Love Languages! Is quality time yours?
- The guilt that can be felt when you don’t feel you are spending enough quality time with your child and some achievable things you can try. Don’t force it!
- Reading books together – why this is so important (and how it helps you to spend quality time with your children as well).
- Keeping it simple and taking the pressure off – if you think about it, you are probably doing it anyway!
Instagram @bespokefamily
Facebook @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Elizabeth joined us from San Francisco – she is founder of Stereotype Kids which was set up because her Boy / Girl twins didn’t want to be restricted to wearing their own clothes and wanted to wear each others.
We chatted about:
- Why Elizabeth feels it’s important to challenge traditional views on boys and girls clothing and to allow the children to dress for joy rather than what they ‘should’ be wearing’.
- Friends and family reactions to the children wearing clothes that they didn’t think they should be.
- ‘Dressing is expressing’ - how this is where Elizabeth wants her children to be and feel comfortable in what they wear with no limits.
- Dressing children (not just twins etc) in the same clothes and how Elizabeth feels about that.
- Individuality and the importance of allowing children to express their personality / style etc.
- Stereotype – which is a gender inclusive clothing line. “You were born to stand out” is their tagline.
- Matching outfits as a family.
- Responding and reflecting if your child wants to wear something you don’t want them to and allowing them to do this freely.
- What if other children or adults (or you) have an adverse reaction to what your children are wearing.
- School uniforms and the responsibility schools have to ensure gender equality in what the children can wear.
- Slogans on tops and colours for children of both genders.
Stereotypekids.com (clothing will be available in the UK next year 2025)
Instagram @bespokefamily / @stereotypekidsofficial
Facebook @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Safia told us all about her company The Mum Hub which she founded in Lockdown, her family and what else she has done and is doing in her career. We also discussed:
- Time management for parents and the common things parents experience for example feeling they are having to be in too many places at once!
- Having a to do list / a priority list and putting things on paper. E.g. what are the top 3 things that I have to focus on?
- Planning and not feeling like you have to ‘do it all’. Lowering expectations of yourself.
- Walking pads!
- Some techniques / tools to help manage time as well as setting boundaries - how available you make yourself / the ways you can be contacted.
- How often it isn’t as bad as you thought it might be – having some perspective.
- Teaching our children about how to manage their time and the myriad of notifications that are thrown at them on a daily basis.
- Things we can do to help organise (and how it’s important to be able to trust others with tasks and preparation to help spread the load!).
- Carving out time for yourself – how important it is, but how it can also lead to guilt.
- Safia’s tips for how to cope when you are feeling overwhelmed.
The Mum Hub website
Instagram @bespokefamily / @the_mumhub
Facebook @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
In the week leading of Halloween you might find that your little ones are feeling more scared than usual. But regardless of this, children can be scared of lots of things and this is the subject of this episode!
We chatted about:
- Halloween and how we never really ‘did’ Halloween when we were little and how much it has ramped up in recent years.
- What we were scared of when we were little (well mainly Becks!).
- How every child is individual in terms of what they are / aren’t scared of – some children will LOVE being scared by example.
- How to respond / react to a little one who is scared of something, the kind of things children can be scared of and why it might be.
- Being scared of dying.
- How feeling fear is a natural emotion and how we need it.
- How to help children regulate when they are feeling scared.
- Some techniques to help children when they feel scared.
- Halloween and being scared!
Related blogs:
“I’m scared!” – 10 tips to help your toddler or pre-schooler with their fears
My child is afraid of the dark
Instagram @bespokefamily
Facebook @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Molly is founder of The Body Happy Organisation and author of ‘Every Body’ and ‘Body Happy Kids’
We spoke to Molly about:
- Her background as a journalist and why she decided to focus on researching and promoting Body Confidence for children (and adults).
- Diet culture around children and becoming aware of all the things they are watching and absorbing all the time.
- Teaching children to value, respect and give dignity to everyone regardless of what they look like.
- Body diversity, discrimination and poor body image.
- Weight stigma and weight bias and how this can affect people throughout their lives, for example how well children do in school, in their career and future lives.
- Molly’s books – ‘Every Body’ for children aged 9+ - and how body image is ‘a we issue not a me issue’ and ‘Body Happy Kids’ written for parents to help children and teens love the skin they are in - raising children with a positive body image.
- Being at peace with your body and all the things that feed into this – body appreciation.
- How parents can approach conversations with children when they are being negative about their bodies or when someone has made a comment about their body.
- How listening and encouraging children to talk to us is one of the most important things we can teach them.
Instagram @bespokefamily / @MollyJForbes / @bodyhappyorg
Facebook @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
We met Josephine at The International Women’s Podcast Awards when she was nominated for her podcast ‘Gloriously unready’ and we were nominated for ours 😉.
Josephine was mum to 3 boys – quite the challenge (her words!). However, two of her children told her (completely independently and within a few months of each other) that they were transgender. One of Josephine’s daughters has now been on hormones for about 8 years (she is now, at the time of recording, 30) and the other daughter for about 3 years (she is now 26). Josephine now has 1 son and 2 daughters.
Amongst alot of things, we spoke with Josephine about:
- How hard it was to accept – Josephine had to readjust all her thinking and deal with her own feelings of loss and fear – were her children they wrong, were they making a mistake?
- Josephine’s feelings when the children told her (you can listen to Josephine's youngest daughter’s side of the story at the start of the second series of Josephine’s podcast Gloriously unready).
- How there were no signs of the children questioning their gender in childhood, yet one of the girls said to Josephine that she had felt like it for the whole of her life.
- How Josephine's middle child has felt about it all.
- Whether the religious side of Josephine's life made it harder for her especially with regards to acceptance of what had happened in her church.
- How while the explosion of social media and open discussion around sexuality and gender has opened up the conversation for teens, it can be difficult for parents to navigate how to handle this.
- How important it is that people might not understand transgender but that having a respectful society is what we need.
- Puberty blockers, surgery and the recent Cass review.
- How meeting transgender people and having conversations with them about the process and hearing their stories has provided Josephine with support and understanding in this area.
- Practical things that can be done to change your gender and how much easier it is to do these things in other countries.
- How Josephine's wider family reacted to the girls including how, since her 2 girls came out, and just a couple of years ago, Josephine’s brother also came out as transgender and is now her sister.
- What Josephine would say to parents whose children have just told them they are transgender.
- The real positives of being a transgender parent.
Another of our podcast episodes you might find interesting – Gender and Sexuality
Josephine’s podcast page - Gloriously unready
Instagram @bespokefamily / @TheJosephineHughes
Facebook @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Are you a hugger? Becks is, Claire isn’t (she just doesn’t feel the need all the time!)!
We spoke about:
- Our own experiences with hugging and showing affection.
- How to approach situations with children and hugging – should it be an expectation that your child hugs people?
- If not, what should you do?
- Having conversations with people about the fact your child can say no they don’t want a hug and when to do it.
- Kissing little ones and reasons we don’t kiss newborn babies (or you could kiss their feet!).
- Teaching children life skills so they know the importance of saying no if something doesn't feel right – that their body is their body and it’s OK.
- How showing affection can be done in many different ways.
- The pandemic and how we weren’t allowed to hug!
- 5 Love Languages and how helpful they are for all of us.
- The power of the Disney Hug.
- NSPCC and the PANTS rule.
Blogs – Should I make my child hug people?
You might also find this blog interesting – Why doesn’t my child show much affection?
NSPCC PANTS rule
Find your Love Language with this free quiz
Instagram @bespokefamily
Facebook @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
This episode was so much fun! Vern joined us from Carifit, the original baby wearing fitness programme. Cari stands for Cardio and resistance intervals and when he started the classes for new mums Vern used to wear the babies while the parents worked out - he had a light bulb moment that parents could wear their own babies to work out and it went from there!
We talked about:
- How from small beginnings the Carifit classes grew and then the baby carrier was born. (Shout out to Hannah Lowry who was one of the first mums to join Vern at a class!)
- Groupology and the science and benefits of moving in sync.
- The benefits of mood, energy and mental health from doing exercise like Carifit – it can even improve postnatal depression symptoms.
- The marvels of the women’s body and how incredible it is!
- How the Carifit caters for parents from the moment they become pregnant and how attitudes to postnatal and ante natal exercise has changed / is changing.
- Shifts in attitudes to ‘getting back in shape’ after having a baby over the years Vern has been working in this area.
- Benefits of Carifit eg no separation, no childcare required, no other people required. How Carifit works if you have multiple babies.
- Carifit classes and the App.
- How great baby wearing is in general - ”A tool for freedom and movement – wear your baby and move!”.
- Golden rules for babywearing and positioning of baby’s legs.
- Is babywearing ‘making a rod for your own back’ - spoiler alert – absolutely not, in fact research supports that babywearing will help keep your day successfully moving forward!
- Three things that Vern wishes he had been told before he had children.
- Babywearing benefits for baby’s brains!
- Shout out from Vern to Mamma Social and Blaze Trails – two highly recommended babywearing walking groups.
Instagram @cari_fit
Carifit website - https://www.getcarifit.com/
Instagram @bespokefamily
Facebook @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
July going into August is a month of birthdays and celebrations for us – starting with our business birthday at the end of July, Becks’s dog Olive’s birthday on 1st August (!), then Becks and her twins (all on the same day!), Claire’s birthday exactly a week after and then Becks’s husband at the end of August! So, we thought that this was the ideal time to look at birthdays, presents, parties and everything that goes along with it!
We spoke about:
- Why birthdays are Becks’s very favourite thing!
- Baby’s first birthdays (they don’t know..!)
- Birthday parties – for all ages and how the most important thing is making it personal for everyone and celebrating as a family together.
- Inviting the WHOLE class from school (and the associated presents!)!
- How parties can be quite overwhelming if the birthday girl / boy doesn’t like being the centre of attention.
- Present alternatives – perhaps give experiences instead (thanks @nannyanita – they are quite often better as a gift for older children).
- Parties – thanks to Mel @sleepNannymelaniehastings – who suggested picking a theme for the party to help keep focus on the party planning.
- Claire’s party project for nanny training (and her duck cake..!).
- Birthday cakes (and some of Becks’s creations for the twins’ birthdays!!).
- Birthday build up and managing expectations and emotions.
- Birthdays and multiple children – twins, triplets and more.
- Christmas and New Year birthdays.
- Party bags (no whistles please!).
Ps – following up on something we said in this episode, Ben actually pulled it out of the bag and ended up giving Amy a beautiful Pandora charm for her birthday 😊!
Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Co-parenting mentor Sarah joined us from Australia for the podcast! She specialises in supporting (mainly) women and their children when relationships break down.
We talked about:
- The importance of putting children first, but how difficult it is when your co-parent isn't on the same page as you in terms of their approach.
- How Sarah started working in the field having had her own traumatic personal experience and being a co-parent herself.
- How Sarah coaches parents to regain their confidence and ‘step into their power’.
- Sarah’s recommendations for effective communication when co-parenting along with what parallel parenting looks like
- Narcissistic ex-partners, what this means and Sarah’s advice when faced with that level of challenge in a co-parenting relationship
- How all co-parenting relationships can be tricky and how making sure you are focussed on the children is of paramount importance.
- The ripple effect of the wider / extended family - the opinions and ‘sides’ that come with this and how to navigate it all.
- The importance of a support system and identifying who is on ‘team me’.
- Recognising that you are a ‘good girl people pleaser’ and breaking this cycle for the sake of your children.
- Sarah’s 3 key tips for your co-parenting journey.
Find Sarah @unshakeablecoparenting on Instagram where she has something for every stage of coparenting. Although Sarah is based in Australia, she works with parents all over the world.
Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Janine is mum of 2 children, who are now 10 and 12. She runs her own business helping coaches and consultants with their marketing and sales.
We spoke to Janine about:
- Whether there is such a thing as a natural born parent and Janine’s feelings on this.
- The stress of getting children out of the house - mum guilt and shouting at children!
- How taking an online parenting course when the children were around 2 and 4 changed things for Janine.
- ‘Feeling maternal’ - the expectation that everything should come naturally to parents and how we haven’t replaced the ‘village’ that helped us to raise our children.
- Having a growth mindset and how this helped Janine to develop in her parenting.
- How Janine felt that she lost her identity and that her world had shrunk when she had her children. How having her own business helped her to get her identity back.
- Three things Janine would say to herself as a new mum.
Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Founder of Onle Networking (an online business network) Kelly West, talked to us about her daughter Kennedy (16) who has global development delay (she has a cognitive age of 2-3) as well as about her business which she founded 5 years ago with her husband and her older daughter.
We discussed:
- How they love people which is why the business was founded (Kelly met her husband at networking!)
- All about Kennedy the signs the family first saw in her and the challenges the family had and still face especially with the lack of support the family have received.
- The experiences Kennedy had in mainstream school and how this currently looks for the family moving forward.
- How Kennedy will never be able to live independently and how Kelly navigates this for the future, including how this and other sensitive topics (like death for example) can be communicated to Kennedy.
- A behaviour (PBS) group that Kelly attended and how helpful she found it.
- The challenges of going out and about with Kennedy and how Kelly deals with situations that arise. Using the sunflower lanyard.
- The autistic spectrum and the huge difference between the ‘severity’ of how this affects different people.
- How Kelly manages the demands of the business alongside the needs of Kennedy and how exhausting it can be day to day.
- How Kelly does (or doesn’t) look after herself...and how she is OK with that.
- The positive support networks that Kelly would recommend and how she also is very open to having conversations with people in the same kind of situation.
Kelly’s business – OnleNetworking
Linked in - @KellyWest
Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including
behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Rebecca started her business when her children were quite young (the youngest was starting school) and she wanted to ‘find her thing’.
We chatted about:
- Rebecca's background – she set up an outsourcing agency ‘Get Ahead’ in 2010 working with companies to provide Virtual Assistants (VAs).
- Having an open mind and a confidence to see where things go and how setting up a business feels like nurturing another child!
- Balancing having a family and young children when setting up a business and how Rebecca managed it.
- The challenges Rebecca faced along the way, how she tackled them and the impact this has had on the children and how they have developed.
- How Rebecca transfers what she did when setting up her business to the VAs (who Rebecca calls ‘Virtual Experts’) working in the business empowering them to also work around their families.
- Lockdown and how nothing really changed for Rebecca during that time (except for having the children at home!) and how the authenticity of working from home has been made so much easier since then.
- Work / life balance and whether there is such a thing for people running their own business.
- The joy of WhatsApp!!
- Empty Nesting, the children in your life and how that feels for Rebecca and other business owners.
- Rebecca’s proud moments and 3 tips for parents setting up their own business!
Get Ahead VA (Rebecca’s company) - https://getaheadva.com/
Get Ahead VA on Instagram - getaheadva
Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more)
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Cate is a Senior Associate at Kingsley Napley and spoke to us about what’s involved when parents divorce.
We covered:
- The 3 strands to a divorce – the divorce itself, the finances, the children.
- No fault divorce and what it is / what it means.
- What happens when courts get involved in terms of making an order about how the children spend their time between parents and whether there is any flexibility.
- Particular patterns of how to share the care of children that Cate would recommend to parents.
- How long the divorce process can take particularly when children are involved.
- Mediation and how that works as part of the process.
- What happens if you aren’t married and have children but want to separate.
- Whether there is such a thing as common law marriage in the UK.
- Child maintenance, what it is and how it is calculated (link below).
- Cate’s tips for communicating your breakup with your child/ren and managing the relationship going forward.
- Cate’s tips for trying to avoid an acrimonious divorce including making sure you have lots of people and systems around to support you both.
- Having goals in place for the future with your children and the importance of communicating these to your lawyer.
- Pre-nups / post-nups – the law around these and how they work.
Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Kingsley Napley Family Law - https://www.kingsleynapley.co.uk/insights/blogs/family-law-blog
About Cate - https://www.kingsleynapley.co.uk/our-people/cate-maguire
Child maintenance calculator - https://www.gov.uk/calculate-child-maintenance
One of the Apps Cate recommends – Our Family Wizard
Our co-parenting blog - https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/blog/coparenting
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Laura was born and raised in Southern California and has been in London since 2021. She is the daughter of an Occupational Therapist (OT) and now runs a private practice – Kid Kind Collective and works with children as a Paediatric OT.
We spoke about:
- What an OT actually does (Becks had no idea!) and why they do what they do in terms of outcomes for the children.
- How OTs help people be adaptive with how they get to the end goal.
- All about sensory processing – what this means and how an OT can help as a ‘sensory detective’ and getting the whole family involved with this.
- How an OT can help when children just can’t sit still (more detective work!)
- How you can get your child referred to an OT and what happens at their first appointment (often work can start before an ADHD or Autism diagnosis for example).
- The link with emotional regulation and how the work that an OT does to support children can impact on this.
- Laura’s top 3 things that she loves about being an OT.
- What Laura’s childhood was like as the daughter of an OT and what she learnt.
Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Laura’s website: https://www.kid-kind.com/
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
This is a topic close to Becks’s heart as she starts to prepare for both of her children leaving home for university. One of Becks’s friends asked us to record this episode – so here you are!
We spoke about:
- How it’s a different milestone to going to childcare / school for the first time.
- The social media phenomenon of making the most of ‘18 summers with your children’...what we think!
- The feelings and emotions that you have and the stages that you go through when your child/ren leave home.
- How Claire felt sad for her parents when she left home for college and how it’s important to think about how you manage the situation as a parent.
- Preparing for the empty nest and the importance of planning for you; what can you do that you have always wanted to?
- Teaching your child/ren life skills and how key this is to prepare them!
- How they will still need you (and the fact that they might come back..!!!!!)!
Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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Please note that Meriel was a surrogate in the US and rules in each country are very different – to find out more about surrogacy rules in the UK you can find them here and more information on surrogacy in the UK here.
Meriel is a three times surrogate from the United States. She was blessed to help two families achieve the dream of completing their families through surrogacy. She currently works for an agency as a surrogacy journey coordinator, where she is passionate about helping to create families and supporting other women who wish to embark on the amazing and fulfilling journey of becoming surrogates.
We spoke to Meriel about:
- What made her decide to become a surrogate and how her family and others reacted (including some funny stories!).
- What surrogacy is, who might use a surrogate and why that might be.
- Some terminology and the process for both the family and the surrogate.
- The contact that the surrogate has with the family throughout the pregnancy and beyond.
- The labour experience and who shared the labour room with Meriel when she had the babies and how special she tried to make it for everyone involved.
- What being a surrogate means to Meriel, the joy she took from it and how it has shaped her and her life as it is now as a surrogacy journey coordinator.
- Some of the rules around surrogacy and being a surrogate as well as the support that there is for surrogates.
- Keeping in touch with the families after the birth of their baby and whether that happens.
- Who is on the birth certificate and legalities (spoiler it can be quite complicated – especially in the US!).
- How research into the best surrogacy path is SO vital!
https://www.collectivesurrogacy.com/ - the agency where Meriel works and where you can find her blogs
Meriel on LinkedIn
Read our blog where we talked to Simon Berney Edwards about his experience of surrogacy here.
Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
We spoke to Hayley and Becky from Paths to Parent Hub. We first came across Paths to Parent Hub when we listened to their podcast following a recommendation from a friend.
We started with Hayley and Becky sharing their own stories with us. Hayley is a donor conceived person herself and is also a parent of twins through sperm donation. Becky was diagnosed with early menopause at 28 – she and her husband did 5 rounds of IVF and then decided to use an egg donor to have her 3 children. Both Hayley and Becky shared their stories on the internet and found each other there.
Becky created Paths to Parent Hub (a membership platform) during lockdown to support people in similar situations to themselves and it now has over 1000 members.
We also talked about:
- When and how Hayley found out that she was a donor conceived person and the reasons she talks about her story now.
- Talking with donor conceived children about how they came to be and dealing with their questions, and those from family and friends.
- The laws around donor conception and the parallels with adoption.
- The experience that Becky had abroad in finding an egg donor and how she feels now about having chosen to have an anonymous donor.
- Whether there is a limit on how many families one donor can produce and how this differs around the world.
- The reasons someone might want / need to use a donor.
- Hayley’s experience when finding her parent sperm donor.
- Terminology around donor conception.
- The information you get about a donor when choosing and how the matching works.
- What Hayley and Becky would say to people considering donor conception.
- About Paths to Parent Hub and the support, information and connection opportunities.
Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily / @pathstoparenthub / @definingmum @dcp_journey_2_rp
Paths to Parent Hub website
All things donor conception - Hayley’s website
Paths to Parent Hub podcast
For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Lee is Becks’s ‘Boxing trainer’ - (well kind of 😉!) and a personal trainer (to real boxers!). He is also a stay-at-home dad looking after his little girl Beaux which started when she was 3 months old.
We talked to Lee about:
- As a couple how Lee and his wife came to the decision that Lee would be the main carer and how he felt about it.
- The reaction from friends and family to Lee staying at home with his little one.
- How he and his wife prepared for parenthood (reading blogs, books, listening to podcasts (ours) and talking to other parents) and how important routine and consistency was for them.
- The importance of working together as a team, communicating about next steps and what might need to be changed etc.
- How Lee fills his weeks with Beaux doing groups, dancing, swimming, crafts and play. Fitting in at baby and toddler groups and what it feels like to often be the only dad there.
- How Lee feels really lucky to be able to spend this amount of time with his daughter.
- Being an only child – the worries Lee has about Beaux being one (Claire is one too so no need to worry 😉).
- Dads and daughters and the wonderful bond they can have!
- What Lee would say to other stay at home / solo dads.
Read our blogs about dads and supporting dads here -
https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/blog/gettingtoknowmarkwilliams?rq=dad
https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/blog/supportingdads?rq=dad
Socials: Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
For information about a Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
You probably already know Susie Amy – perhaps from Footballer’s Wives or maybe from Hollyoaks or as a stage actress (we recently saw her in Fatal Attraction). We do too, but we are also lucky to know Susie via a mutual friend who gave her a gift of some time with Claire when her first baby was born. Susie didn’t feel for a while that she was ready to use this gift straight away – she felt instead that her baby didn’t like / need sleep and was just a bit different! When Claire spent some time with Susie and her family a routine was introduced and they haven’t looked back!
We talked to Susie about:
- The importance of sleep (and how more sleep means better sleep)!
- When Claire had worked with her and Raff to introduce a routine - they stuck to it like glue and responded to their baby’s sleep signals, Noa immediately responded!
- How predictability is important to all of us and how Susie has found the children’s routine helpful for her as well.
- The responsibility of having a baby feeling huge, but how just a few tweaks and a routine can help so much.
- Trusting your instincts as a parent.
- Being nap trapped and how it doesn’t have to be a negative thing!
- Restorative naps and where these work best.
- Morning, bedtime and bathtime routines and how important they are from the start.
- How the best gift for a new parent is support!
Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
For information about a Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
If not, you must listen to this podcast!
We spoke to Bik-ki Wong and Helen Thompson who are both partners at Myerson solicitors
Bik-ki is responsible for wills, trust and probate and Helen heads up the department that looks after contesting wills.
We talked to Bik-ki about:
- What happens if you don’t write a will? Doesn’t it just go to my husband / wife? Not necessarily, Bik-ki explained. And what happens if you aren’t married?
- How many people we know who don’t have a will and don’t want to think about it.
- The fact that a will doesn’t have to be expensive; you can have a simple one drawn up and there are charities that might write a simple one for you.
- What happens if you both die and don’t have a will or are a sole / single parent?
- Appointing a guardian, how you do this and the implications.
- Some real-life case studies of families who realised they needed to make a will for example because of illness or divorce.
- How often you should review your will once it has been written.
- Some of the terminology and responsibilities. The role of an Executor, Trustee, Guardian, how many you should have and things to consider when choosing them.
- How having family planning meetings around writing wills can be helpful.
- 3 things that Bik-Ki would say to someone who doesn't have a will.
And we talked to Helen about:
What happens when...
- a will is challenged and the associated issues and conflicts.
- there isn’t a will and the intestacy rules that come in to play where the law decides what happens.
- for example, a child isn’t provided for in a will because a will hasn’t been updated.
- Considerations for blended families, step families, solo parents, single parents etc.
3 things to consider when looking at issues with a will.
Instagram: @myersonsolicitors @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
More information about Myerson can be found here - https://www.myerson.co.uk/
Contact Myerson about making a will here
Government information on making a will: https://www.gov.uk/make-will
Read our bereavement blogs here including a blog from Bik-Ki about writing a will
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
For information about a Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Violet (Katherine’s eldest daughter) was fully out of nappies by 10 / 11 months, but how did she do it?! Katherine shares all with us in this funny, insightful and informative episode!
Amongst all the talk of poo and pee, we chatted with Katherine about...
- The potty training approach Katherine has used –often referred to as elimination communication. She told us how she has used this approach with all of her children by having a consistent routine, watching their faces for signs, offering the potty several times a day and gradually transitioning the children out of nappies. The key she said, is consistency, routine, never to punish and learn their cues.
- How Katherine wasn’t sure she would have attempted Potty training twins with this method, but gave us some tips as to how she’d approach it. She felt like waiting to potty train until her children were toddlers would have meant push back to using the potty, but that by using this method it’s all they have ever known!
- How people reacted to Violet being potty trained so early.
- Katherine’s approach to parenting being based on instinct, putting herself in her children’s shoes when making decisions on how to care for them. She feels that what is most important is to have a peaceful caregiver and doing things to make this happen with no judgement.
- Her attitude to social media and how it has affected her parenting (it hasn’t!). How her biggest change in approach since having Violet is considering Bobby as the other parent and convincing him of her wild and wacky parenting ideas (he knows how lucky he is!).
- Katherine ‘s new TV programme ‘Parental Guidance’ and all the different families she has met through this.
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
For information about a Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Instagram - @bespokefamily
Facebook - @bespokefamily
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
There are lots of different ways for children to play, but one of the elements of play is rough and tumble – but what is it?
We spoke about:
- What is involved in rough and tumble play?
- Respecting when your little one wants to stop and establishing rules / boundaries for when children are playing rough and tumble together and how to do this (perhaps have a word - possibly “Flamingo” or maybe even “sausages” 😉!!). Sharing these rules with others who might want to do rough and tumble play with your children.
- Understanding their own bodies and their own limits (and recognising that rough and tumble isn’t for every child).
- How this kind of play contributes to relationships and is a valuable learning opportunity.
- When this kind of play can fit in well during your day and how it can help with emotions / get the ‘wiggles’ out.
- Why wind down from Rough and tumble play is important.
- Some ideas of what you can do for rough and tumble play.
Our blog: Why children need rough and tumble in their day
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
For information about a 1:1 Parent Consultations to support with behaviour click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Instagram - @bespokefamily
Facebook - @bespokefamily
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Hitting (and any of that type of ‘inappropriate’ behaviour) can be difficult whichever side you are on – either the parent of the child who is hitting or the one who has been hit.
We chatted about:
- Why Children (and some adults) do this!
- Emotions and how they affect children’s behaviour.
- Cause and effect – ‘if I do this what happens’.
- How children are attention needing and that this can drive their behaviour.
- Children laughing when they’ve hit you...and why??
- How to respond when a child hits.
- Looking for triggers and pre-empting when it might happen.
- Working together with nursery to help with the situation.
- “Kind hands” 😂
- 3 things to remember when your child hits.
Our ‘Hitting’ blog: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/blog/whydoesmychildhit?rq=hit
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
For information about a 1:1 Parent Consultation to support with behaviour click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Instagram - @bespokefamily
Facebook - @bespokefamily
https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Managing the dynamic and using grandparents for childcare
More and more we are using grandparents to help care for our children, but what do we need to think about? This episode goes into it all, the plusses, the minuses and how to approach it.
- Some stats – ever wondered how many of us use grandparents for childcare?
- Things to think about when asking grandparents if they can help with childcare – how it can really change the dynamic.
- “Well I raised you OK didn’t I? You’re OK...”. How to get your own parents up to speed (and on board) with the way you want / need things to be done!
- The relationship we (and children) have with our own parents and had with our grandparents.
- Having ongoing conversations and communication are important and that family time and childcare time are clearly defined so that it doesn’t impact on your relationship.
- Making sure the finances and ground rules are all clearly defined.
- Growing out of going to granny / grandpa’s house.
- It takes a village!
Our Grandparent blogs – https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/blog/category/Grandparents
State pension payments - https://www.gov.uk/government/news/looking-after-the-grandchildren-make-sure-it-counts-towards-your-state-pension
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including sleep, welcoming your newborn and caring for your newborn) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Instagram - @bespokefamily
Facebook - @bespokefamily
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative / @decibelle_creative
We talked about sleep for babies under 6 months:
- How babies don’t immediately start sleeping through the night (and neither do we!).
- Why they wake and what ‘sleeping through the night’ actually means.
- The transition from the womb to ‘outside life’! It’s quite a change!
- Can you teach babies ‘bad sleep habits’?
- Starting to look at a sleep routine (6-8 weeks) - if you want to.
- Introducing a bedtime routine and wind down to naps
- 4 month sleep regression (or is it progression?)
- Sleep associations – what they go to sleep with needs to be replicated when they wake up.
- Are they too tired? Can you put them to bed / nap a bit earlier?
Our Sleep blogs – https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/blog/category/Sleep
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including sleep, welcoming your newborn and caring for your newborn) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Instagram - @bespokefamily
Facebook - @bespokefamily
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
We covered so much with Sian including:
- Sian’s background and how @moonandrue started with a few weaning videos!
- The @moonandrue community – keeping it real.
- Baby led weaning – how a child needs to be developmentally ready (and the fact that a baby can still choke on purees).
- Allergens and how Rue reacted to egg when she first tried it.
- How Rue choked on a piece of apple, what Sian did and her feelings afterwards.
- The baby (up to 1) and child first aid training that Sian did with @stjohn_ambulance.
- Some tips around preparing foods for little ones and things to try and avoid.
- The baby and child first aid resources available via St John Ambulance and what they cover.
Useful blog – What should I have in my first aid kit?
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Instagram - @bespokefamily / @stjohn_ambulance
Facebook - @bespokefamily
TikTok - @MoonandRue
St John Ambulance
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
What we want to do instinctively is to jump in and solve it for our children but they need to learn the skills to deal with it and this is what we talked about:
- Children can be cruel – it's hard to hear when someone says they don’t want to be your friend or don’t invite you to their birthday party, but as a parent what can you do / say when this happens?
- What do we do / say when it’s our child that isn’t being a nice friend?
- How it’s important to think carefully about how we talk about friendships to our children.
- Why children behave the way they do with regards to friendships.
- Our own experiences with friendships (Claire’s story is not to be taken as advice..!!).
- How we as adults are still working out friendships and relationships!
- What we can do if our child is struggling with making friends.
- Why we need to give our children the skills and support to be a good friend.
- How we as parents eventually become second fiddle to our children’s friends!
Our blog – Tricky Friendships...what can I do to help my child?
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Instagram - @bespokefamily
Facebook - @bespokefamily
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Doula Lou is a mum of 2 children – she originally trained as a nanny and worked with children and families for 8 years. Following the birth of her own children she stayed at home caring for them. Once they had both gone to school she decided to re-train as a post-natal Doula.
We talked to Lou about:
- A Doula’s role and responsibilities.
- Lou’s training as a Doula and what’s involved.
- The difference between a Maternity Nurse and a Doula.
- The Fourth Trimester explained and Lou’s own experiences of this.
- The developing brain – how babies look to us to help them solve how they feel and to meet their basic needs.
- Looking after yourself in the early days and getting used to having a new little person completely reliant on you.
- Some things to think about in those early days and the importance of finding your ‘tribe’.
- A post-natal plan and what you can include.
- Birth trauma and the three step rewind.
- Lou’s top 3 tips for new parents.
Doula Lou Instagram
Lou’s website - www.doula-lou.com
Doula UKfor training and to find a Doula
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Instagram - @bespokefamily
Facebook - @bespokefamily
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
How do you deal with it if you have a different parenting style from your partner, parent, friend etc. and how can we make sure that the way we parent is helping to promote our children’s independence?
We chatted about:
- How different parenting approaches can impact on children’s resilience.
- The fact that we have become very risk averse and have started to always be there (in person or via technology) to make sure our children are OK.
- How our experiences of being parented can impact our own parenting style.
- That our ‘safety mode’ needs to teach our children how to help themselves when we aren’t there.
- What has changed since we were little without a phone or any tracking apps?
- Managing risk and trust – children need to feel trusted to try things with our support and suggestions.
- What happens when we micromanage our children.
- The importance of talking to partners and other carers about the approach you are taking – it’s a constant review.
- Changing your own narrative to take your own feelings out of it and problem solve together with your children.
- Striking a balance – not being too overprotective but teaching them the life skills to be able to cope.
- All the animals...! Tiger, Jellyfish, Elephant, Dolphin (lawnmower!) parenting etc.
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Instagram - @bespokefamily
Facebook - @bespokefamily
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Suzanne’s own experiences inspired her to set up the Parenting Mental Health charity – in 2015 when Suzanne’s daughter Issy was 14, she was severely bullied at school leading to a sharp decline in her mental health – she was depressed, anxious and suicidal.
We talked through many aspects of this story including:
- Issy’s final trigger, her referral and her disclosure to the doctor that she was going to end her life – this was the moment Suzanne shared where the family reached absolute crisis point.
- Suzanne’s experiences of CAMHS (Children and Adolescent Mental Health Service) and other therapy support.
- How Suzanne felt she had failed as a parent who just wanted to ‘fix’ what was happening to Issy, as well as the deep shame, trauma and isolation she felt as a parent of a child with a mental health issue.
- ‘Partnering not parenting’ the programme that Suzanne has written for parents of young people who are experiencing poor mental health.
- The Facebook group Suzanne set up to support parents in the same critical situation that she experienced and how it grew and grew.
- How the only control we have over our children’s life is how we behave and how we respond. That love isn’t enough and we need spaces to connect with people who are further along the road with their child’s mental health journey.
- Suzanne’s 3 things that she feels are most important as a parent - Am I present? Can I be patient? Am I listening?
- The fact that we don’t have to come to crisis point to change - it starts with today.
- That children don’t have to be happy all the time! Suzanne’s advice is to look for presence, not for happiness.
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including ‘Your Guide to Teens and Tweens’) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Parenting mental health website
Suzanne’s book – Never let go – how to parent your child through mental illness
https://www.youtube.com/@parentingmentalhealth
Our Tween / Teenage blogs
If you have enjoyed this podcast have a look at our other teen episodes.
Talking to Teenagers
Parenting Teens
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
A bit of a different episode this week where we introduce you to our parent consultations and give you some information about what they actually involve, including...
- How to decide whether a parent consultation is for you.
- What a parent consultation can help with.
- The fact that each consultation is tailored to each individual family and their situation.
- The overwhelm parents feel with so many different types of information being given to them and the benefit of having someone completely objective look at their situation.
- The forms and information we need before the call.
- How important it is that everyone is on board with what the plan is.
- The packages we offer and how they work.
- The fact that you might get emotional – but you absolutely won’t be the first one (and you absolutely won’t find judgement on any situation you find yourself in).
- The importance of consistency to resolve any situation!
- Coming back to us – we love supporting families on a recurring basis as their children move through the different stages (Newborn to Teen and Everything in Between!).
- An introduction to our consultants and their backgrounds.
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including our ‘guide to sleep’) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Parent Consultation information
Instagram - @bespokefamily
Facebook - @bespokefamily
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
This is one of our most read blogs on the website (see link to this below) and so we thought it would be a good thing to talk about!
- Why does this happen and isn’t it just the same as waking through the night?
- Some of the reasons this might happen – can naps have an impact for example? Do you need to bring bedtime forward?
- Having a check list as to what the cause might be (and what to put on the list).
- The bedtime routine and why it is so important.
- How to make changes and be consistent!
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including our ‘guide to sleep’) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Why does my little one wake within an hour of going to bed? - Our Blog
Instagram - @bespokefamily
Facebook - @bespokefamily
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
We talked about:
- Why Jenny does what she does and how she supports working mums (and dads).
- What really thriving means as a working parent.
- How to bring yourself up in the priority list in order to bring the best of yourself to parenting.
- Where does the guilt come from in doing things for yourself? Remembering that you can have it all but you can’t do it all!
- The concept of self care and what does this really mean? For example, isn’t a relaxing bath just a basic need?
- Why it’s important for your children to see that it’s OK to not always be busy.
- Carving out adult time when / if you can – it really is OK to put yourself first and does you good.
- Jenny’s top 3 tips to help you thrive not just survive!
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including our newborn guides) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Instagram - @bespokefamily / @jennyhopkinscoaching
Facebook - @bespokefamily
Jenny’s website: Jennyhopkinscoaching.com
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
We talked about:
- How the pregnancies were for Stu and how he researched and prepared for each baby to come.
- How Stu doesn’t have any real experience with children – with his first child he was always learning and it was all a bit surreal!
- Having a second child and how this will change the dynamic from having a first baby.
- The key role that dad / the partner that isn’t carrying the baby plays. He couldn’t breastfeed, but contributed in other ways working as part of a family team!
- The thing that really stood out for Stu as a new dad?
- Whether he met and connected with any other dads?
- Stu’s experiences of having his first child during Covid.
- Stu’s advice for a new dad.
- How to handle any concerns and worries and the fact that everyone makes mistakes!
Stu’s book recommendations:
Your baby week by week – Caroline Fertleman and Simone Cave
Crib sheet - A Data-Driven Guide to Better, More Relaxed Parenting, from Birth to Preschool – Emily Oster
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including our newborn guides) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Instagram - @bespokefamily
Facebook - @bespokefamily
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
This is a topic which lots of people told us they wanted more information about so we went on a deep dive (?!) into night time dryness!
We talked about:
- The expectation that once days are dry that nights will automatically follow.
- The hormone we need to help us stay dry at night.
- What night time dryness really means.
- When you might need to visit your GP.
- How you know if your child is ready or not to be dry at night.
- The stats – how many children are wet through the night and at what age?
- The reasons why your child might wet the bed.
- The importance of checking whether or not your child is constipated and why / how this can affect night time dryness.
- What you can do to help, how to be prepared for when it happens and some products to help.
- The ‘dream wee’ – is it really the top tip it is purported to be??
Our toilet training blogs
ERIC – the children’s bowel and bladder charity - bedwetting information
Products that might help - Amazon link
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including ‘Your Guide to Toilet Training’) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Instagram - @bespokefamily
Facebook - @bespokefamily
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
“We don’t go to a French class already speaking French” was how Sam @SPDTuitionandCoaching started the podcast and this was how she and Charlotte want all parents to approach preparations for school. They feel that children need to be learning ready – not from what they know already but how they are prepared using emotional balance and communication.
Sam and Charlotte are both mums of children under 5, with Charlotte’s little one preparing to go to school for the first time in September. We had a fascinating discussion with them about:
- Whether your child needs to be able to write their name and do basic maths before they start school (they don’t..!)
- Giving parents the skills to feel empowered to have a proactive approach to building foundations for school.
- What to do if you as a parent didn’t like school yourself!
- Why emotional balance is so important for this transition.
- How we can model our own emotions to help our children’s development.
- Speech and language – encouraging communication in whichever way is appropriate for our children.
- Preparing for ‘what you could do’ rather than ‘what you should do’.
- The Foundations for skills workshop from Sam and Charlotte at 8.30pm 12 July 2023 (don’t worry if you have missed it, get in touch with Sam / Charlotte as there is a recording you can access too!). The free session will give you some simple tools to help prepare your children for school. Click on the link below to register.
Click the link to book the workshop on 12 July 2023 (look out for a special Bespoke Family gift from Sam and Charlotte too!) - Book the workshop here!
Our preparing for school blogs:
How to help your child prepare for school
That ‘back to school feeling’
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Instagram - @bespokefamily / @spdtuitionandcoaching / @speechtherapywithcharlotte
Facebook - @bespokefamily
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
In this episode we talked about everything you need to know to help you make a decision that is right for you and your children including all of the different types of childcare, financial considerations, the hours you need covered, location, facilities and more!
We also covered:
- Planning ahead – how far and what to consider
- Different types of childcare and how they operate.
- Dealing with sickness (including a couple of lovely anecdotes 🤢)
- What to look for and how to decide.
Blogs:
Choosing childcare that is right for you and your child
What to look for when choosing a nursery and how to prepare your child/ren (and you) for their first day!
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Instagram - @bespokefamily
Facebook - @bespokefamily
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
For the first time in a while Claire posed a question in Challenge Becks – what would she do when faced with a monumental meltdown??! How did she answer..?
We also talked about:
- Why a tantrum might escalate.
- Looking at our own triggers - how it is never easy in the moment especially with so many things are going on for both of you.
- Some ideas for strategies to use to help regulate ourselves (which we need to do, to be able to help regulate our children).
- How there are days when you will ‘smash it’ in terms of your approach and days when you go to bed feeling like the whole day has been a disaster (remember that you are only human and it’s OK!).
- The importance of making sure that children know what’s going on in their day, especially because it might help to prevent a tantrum escalation.
- Thinking about how you would help support a friend and look at how you can do the same with your children – ‘connect before you re-direct’.
- What you can do to try and help your child when they are mid meltdown (and whether offering a cuddle is like giving a reward for the tantrum).
- How the techniques you use with toddlers can also help when you have teenagers!
- And finally, some reassurance that even Claire can get triggered when a child is having a meltdown!
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) - including ‘Your Guide to Behaviour and Emotions’ - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Instagram - @bespokefamily
Facebook - @bespokefamily
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Karen has been interested in play for a long time – she finds play fascinating and has a career dedicated to teaching, researching and learning about it. She has a PhD in Play and is now a Lecturer at Bath Spa University. We covered so much with Karen including:
- Helping parents understand play and how it can make a real difference to home life and how it connects children and adults.
- The value of following children’s lead in play and the skill of playing alongside them rather than hijacking it.
- Feeling more comfortable with suspending reality and finding our inner child.
- Balancing your day with activities, outings, free play etc – do you need to?
- The importance of understanding your child and their interests.
- Invitations to play – what are they and how much effort do they take?!
- What toys you really need (spoiler alert – sometimes a box of bricks or a cardboard box is all!).
- Managing situations where children aren’t interested in the activities you have set up and whether it matters and what you can do if ‘all they want to do is play with cars’!
- Karen’s 3 main benefits of play.
- And finally, the fact that all the points we discuss are as relevant for neurodivergent children as they are for neurotypical children – play is play!
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) - including ‘Your Guide to Play’ - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Instagram - @bespokefamily
Facebook - @bespokefamily
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Wedding and party season is fast approaching which is so lovely and exciting, but can sometimes be tricky when you throw little children into the mix! In our episode this week we talk about things that might be a challenge and how you can make taking children to events a bit easier for all of you.
We also covered:
- How the venues that parties and weddings are held in tend to be huge open spaces – perfect for running and making lots of noise!!
- Becks’s wedding and how she prepared her twins (age 2 at the time) within an inch of their lives 😉
- Knowing what to expect at the event and managing your own expectations.
- The FOMO is real at occasions like this – how do you make it work?
- Being ready with a plan B if your children don’t want to participate in any activities provided.
- Some ideas to help keep children occupied and what’s good to take with you.
- Dealing with possible overwhelm at family parties (for you and the children!).
- Taking a new baby to events.
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Instagram - @bespokefamily
Facebook - @bespokefamily
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Trigger warning – we talk openly about relationships and sex in this podcast
Saskia is a sex education and relationship teacher – she delivers classes in school as well as talking to parents about what foundations to put in place at home.
This episode is longer than usual (and we could have gone on talking!), but we had so much to cover on such an important topic. Amongst other things we chatted with Saskia about:
- Parents being an invaluable source of information for children.
- Having a ‘long lense’ on the conversation – it doesn’t all need to be talked about at once.
- Our own experiences of sex education – who remembers having ‘the talk’?!
- The importance of using the correct terminology for anatomy from a young age.
- Making the topic part of every day conversation and some ideas of how to frame conversations as well as places that it can be easier to have them (in the car etc)
- Remembering to talk about other ways that babies can be made (eg IVF, surrogacy etc)
- Always answering questions even if you need someone to help you.
- What to do when children become aware of their own bodies and start to explore their ‘private parts’.
- Whether Saskia ever gets embarrassed talking about sex?
Helpful Relationship and Sex Education books for all ages(IMPORTANT: before reading any book with your child(ren) please read it to check that you are comfortable and happy with the content)
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Instagram - @bespokefamily / @factsoflife.ed
Facebook - @bespokefamily
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
If you are experiencing this at the moment you will know that it can cause so much upset, not only for the parent or carer that is being ‘rejected’, but also for the parent / carer who is needing to do everything with and for their child.
In this episode we talked about:
- Why this happens and typically what age it might be.
- The emotions surrounding it and how it can feel for parents and carers.
- What you can do to help (and why it’s important not to push things with your little one – your reactions will always provoke a reaction!)
- How children are egocentric and only see things from their own perspective – this stage is all about learning about life, feelings and building connections.
- How this can happen any time but that it is particularly prevalent at times of change.
- Some steps to try and help and other things you can do to help keep your child feeling safe and secure.
My child only wants me! - blog
Separation anxiety blogs
Separation anxiety podcast episode
Helpful books
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Instagram - @bespokefamily
Facebook - @bespokefamily
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
It was a delight to chat with Elizabeth who has worked in education for 35 years. With suicide being the 2nd highest cause of death in North America, her aim is to build and strengthen bridges between teens and their parents / carers, connecting families through courageous conversations.
We talked about:
· The teenage brain and how we need to develop our own approach alongside our teens’ development.
· How it’s good to be a consultant not a manager to our teens and always being honest with them.
· Building resilience and respectful relationships with our teens.
· Whether being a parent to a teenager is really that bad!
· Starting the conversation early to get it to be 2nd nature – valuing our children’s voice.
· Looking at how to start conversations in a different way to avoid escalation (this can help with adults too!).
· Allowing teens time to de-compress and why it’s important for them.
· And finally, Elizabeth’s top tips for communicating with teenagers.
Elizabeth’s book - ‘Courageous Conversations’
Elizabeth’s website
Teen blogs
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) including ‘Your Guide to Teens’ get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Instagram - @bespokefamily
Facebook - @bespokefamily
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Becks never used a screen for her children at mealtimes, but that was only because she didn’t have a smart phone or ipad when they were little! There is no judgement here and also no need to despair if your children are watching a screen at mealtimes, all is not lost and this podcast will help!
We talked about ...
- the reasons we might start letting our children have a screen at mealtime (surely it’s a good thing if the child is eating their food, is calm and isn’t bored?!)
- our own screen use – especially at meal times or when our children are eating.
- how focussing on a screen affects us and the way we eat.
- the benefits of family mealtimes and conversation.
- what we can do to help our little ones eat without a screen (and lots of ideas and suggestions for what to do instead!).
Instagram - @bespokefamily
Facebook - @bespokefamily
Blog – Screentime and mealtimes...is it OK?
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
We started the podcast with Emma describing how Amala was diagnosed, which happened very quickly just after the twins were born.
This is an emotional listen – Emma has faced a huge amount of challenge since Amala was born with sadly almost non-existent support; but she has learnt so much, not least that Amala is just as perfect as her other children, she just has different needs.
We also talked to Emma about:
- Balancing Amala’s needs with those of her other children.
- The life skills that her boys have gained by having a sister with Down’s Syndrome – including empathy and acceptance of people’s differences.
- The negativity that Emma and her family have experienced from her family since Amala (whose condition was seen as bad luck) was born.
- What Emma would say to a parent who has a child with special needs.
- Together or apart? Why Emma decided to separate her twins at pre-school and how their independence grew.
- The need to always be fighting for your child’s rights and a childhood they deserve.
- What Emma has learnt from being a parent of a child with special needs.
Instagram - @bespokefamily
Facebook - @bespokefamily
Find out more about the charity Gympanzees which Emma mentioned here
Books by Sue Buckley who Emma speaks so highly of in the podcast can be found here
Down’s Syndrome Association
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) including Sleep - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Without even talking about being nap trapped, the topic of naps are already a big thing for parents! Encouraging babies and children to get the right amount of sleep in the day can become an obsession – if only to get a full night’s sleep! Being nap trapped is therefore a double-edged sword – on one hand you want your little one to get good restorative sleep, but on the other you also don’t want to be stuck at home or compromise naps because of the school run etc.
In this episode we spoke about:
- What being nap trapped even means!
- Why so many classes and groups seem to be over nap time (spoiler alert – we didn’t have the answer to this one..!)
- Prioritising what’s important to you and perhaps changing our mindset with regards to naps.
- Slowing things down and looking at each day to see how that might help to plan naps in.
- The importance of a pre-nap routine to help our little ones to wind down to sleep.
- The ever evolving nap schedule (remember that one day there will be no naps!)
Instagram - @bespokefamily
Facebook - @bespokefamily
Our sleep blogs!
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) including Sleep - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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Jemma is a Bereavement Support Practitioner at Winston’s Wish for their online and helpline services; providing advice, support and guidance to young people, parents and caregivers as well as professionals. We had a really interesting chat with Jemma about the services that Winston’s Wish provide, but also about how to communicate with children about death and how we grow around grief.
Claire also shared her own personal story, supporting a family who are very close to her following the death of a parent.
We talked about:
- The key messages when someone calls the Winston’s Wish helpline.
- That it’s OK not to feel sad and not to cry when someone dies.
- Whether you can make things worse by talking with family and friends about death and dying (you can’t!).
- Taking children’s lead in these situations and being as open and honest with them as possible.
- Communication around bereavement with much younger children.
- The death of the Queen and what impact this had.
- What happens after someone has died and what support is good to offer while life inevitably moves on – how to continue to remember and honour the person who has died.
- Where the name ‘Winston’s Wish’ came from!
- 3 key things to be aware of when someone dies.
Winston’s Wish Website
Helpline number: 08088 020 021
Instagram - @bespokefamily / @winstonswish
Facebook - @bespokefamily / @winstonswish
Our bereavement blogs
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) including Welcoming your Newborn / Caring for your Newborn - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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Hannah worked as a nanny before she had her own children and it was then that she realised the importance of support in the area of breastfeeding. She trained as an IBCLC practitioner and is now a qualified lactation consultant (put simply, that means that there’s not much that Hannah doesn’t know about breastfeeding!)
We talked with Hannah about:
- What a lactation consultant is and what IBCLC stands for and means!
- Some of the issues that can be experienced by families around feeding and how a lactation consultant can help.
- How you know where to go for to get the right advice.
- Making a feeding plan before baby is born.
- Common misconceptions around breastfeeding.
- Preparing to breastfeed – what is actually happening to your body?
- Getting the other parent and extended family involved.
- Benefits of breastfeeding and what might surprise you to know.
- Combination feeding.
- Latching (think apples!)
Instagram - @bespokefamily @hannahcroftibclc
Facebook - @bespokefamily @hannahcroftibclc
Hannah’s website
Lactation Consultants of Great Britain website
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) including Breastfeeding / Welcoming your Newborn / Caring for your Newborn - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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Claire has worked with children and babies for over 20 years and in that time has made up and fed to her charges, more bottles than Becks has had hot dinners (and that’s a lot!). In this episode, Becks picks Claire’s brain about all things bottle feeding!
We covered ALOT(!) including:
- The paraphernalia and the important things to make sure you have.
- Different types of steriliser, how to use them and the pros and cons of each.
- Washing your bottles.
- Making up a bottle.
- The NHS booklet that we can’t get enough of (see link below)!
- Storing expressed milk.
- Which formula milk?
- Out and about and travelling with a bottle feeding baby.
- Teat sizes and how much milk to give.
- Bottle feeding multiples.
- Feeding safely.
NHS Guide to Bottle Feeding
Our YouTube videos for bottlefeeding (loads of practical demonsatrations!)
Instagram - @bespokefamily
Facebook - @bespokefamily
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) including Welcoming your Newborn / Caring for your Newborn - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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Samantha Dholakia (Sam) from SPD Tuition and Coaching has worked with children all her life and is particularly interested in the link between academic success and wellbeing. In her work she looks at how connecting with children (of all ages) helps them to understand about themselves and achieve what they want to. Sam’s other qualification in this topic is that she is mum to a toddler!
We chatted with Sam about:
- How the toddler development stage impacts on us as parents and how we develop alongside our children as they grow.
- The toddler reputation and how this influences the way we approach our relationships with them.
- Why?! That constant question at this age – recognising that our toddlers are growing into little people who want to communicate and be communicated with.
- The baby voice / baby language
- How communication is important to help build a mutually respectful relationship with our toddlers.
- Our relationship with our technology (phones etc) and how this can affect communication on all levels.
- Volume (ours and our children’s!)
- And finally, Sam’s top 3 tips for talking to toddlers.
Blogs:
Instagram - @bespokefamily @spdtuitionandcoaching
Facebook - @bespokefamily
SPD Tuition and Coaching website
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
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Christmas is a time when there are huge expectations and we put a lot of pressure on ourselves, so for this episode we decided to chat about what the issues can be and what we can do to make it all a bit easier. We talked about:
· Our own Christmases and who we share them with (spoiler alert...Claire’s includes a nap!)
· Making things ‘perfect’ and why we feel we have to make it that way.
· Seeing everyone at Christmas and feeling we have to cram it all into one day!
· What would happen if you didn’t ‘do it all’?
· Your inner critic and the importance of not letting it get to you!
· Dealing with high expectations and possible judgement at Christmas – how can you make it easier for yourself?
· Saying thank you by giving hugs and kisses that might be expected from children at Christmas.
· Setting the tone... if people don’t want to be part of it then that’s OK!
Blogs:
Why doesn’t my child show much affection?
How do you get children to appreciate what they have?
Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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Vicky is a professional organiser (@youneedavicky on Instagram) and author of Amazon Bestseller Start with Your Sock Drawer, but Vicky came onto the podcast to talk about adopting her beautiful daughter ‘Tippy’. We talked about:
- What led Vicky to want to have children in the first place and why she chose adoption as her path.
- What the adoption process involves.
- Whether being a solo parent meant that she was treated differently in the adoption process.
- How Vicky first met Tippy and the reactions she has had when talking about her adoption experience.
- Tippy’s ‘life story book’ and what this means to them both.
- Vicky’s advice to anyone thinking of adopting.
Vicky’s favourite parenting books:
The A-Z of Theraputic Parenting
The Science of Parenting
How to Talk so Little Kids Will Listen
Adoption UK
Child adoption overview gov.uk
Apply to adopt a child through your council
Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Vicky’s website
1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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Getting rid of your child’s dummy can be a daunting prospect, but never fear because this podcast covers all you need to know about why, when and how to ditch the dummy – this is what we cover:
- ‘Long term’ dummy use and what issues it might cause over time?
- The age you should look at ditching the dummy.
- When the best time is to do it (and when shouldn’t you give it a go?)
- Judgement (that old chestnut!) by other parents, family, friends and why you should ignore it.
- The first steps in getting rid of the dummy and whether it has to be ‘cold turkey’.
- Supporting little ones who don’t understand.
- How long the whole process tends to take, and
- How to answer the question about where all the dummies go!
Links:
The Lullaby Trust – Dummies and SIDS
Our blog – Dummies and how to stop your child using theirs!
Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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We were delighted to be joined for this podcast by Andrew Howard who is Curriculum Leader of PSHE at Bristol's largest secondary school, covering sex and relationship education and issues of equality, diversity and inclusion among other topics. The school Andrew works at supports many pupils with their gender identity, and has won accolades for its responsiveness to incidents of transphobia, homophobia, sexism and racism through curriculum.
We had lots of questions (many of which we had been asked by parents) for Andrew, not least ‘what is gender and sexuality?’ Andrew answered every question we had clearly and with sensitivity (and the most important thing we learnt was that you really can’t get it wrong…)
We also talked about:
- Why it’s so important to talk to children about gender and sexuality
- How schools educate teachers and staff on the topic
- Whether you can get it wrong
- How parents can approach these conversations with their children
- Coping with hostile environments at home
- The Equality Act and what it means
- How to support people who are exploring their gender or sexuality
- Terminology – what’s right and what isn’t
- The difference between sex and gender
Links
- Advice for parents and carers of trans people - https://genderedintelligence.co.uk/projects/kip/transidentities/parents.html
- Off the Record (Bristol based charity) - https://www.otrbristol.org.uk
- Brook - https://www.brook.org.uk
Some recommended books for younger children:
- Perfectly Norman
- Julian is a Mermaid
- My shadow is pink
- Pink is for boys
Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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Someone asked us a question about this a while ago and it’s a topic we have been looking forward to discussing on the podcast. We weren’t sure where it would go, but actually it turned into a very interesting chat! Amongst other things, we discussed:
- Whether being spoilt is actually a negative thing.
- If you can spoil a child with too much attention
- Why we can ‘be spoilt’ but children can’t!
- Whether treating is different to spoiling?
- How to deal with the situation when children get upset because they can’t have what they want .
- The instant world – has it had an effect on the way we parent?
- Judgement and parental approaches.
- Only children and being spoilt.
- Judgement and labelling in relation to the word ‘spoilt’
- Explanation and appreciation and why they are both really important when communication with and role modelling for our children.
Links
Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Behaviour blogs
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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We were delighted to welcome Saskio Boujo on to the podcast to talk about periods and period poverty.
Saskia is a relationship and sex educator who has been teaching young people for over 20 years. Her work involves delivering workshops to young people, training teachers and organising parent events. Saskia self-published her book, This Period In My Life, in July 2020 – it is a period guidebook dedicated to the many young people she teaches.
This was such a fascinating and insightful chat where we covered:
- What period poverty actually is.
- The issues around period blood and the negative connotations associated with it.
- How girls find out about the fact that they will have periods.
- The budget available to schools for period products and education in this area.
- The work going on in schools to change the language around periods.
- Saskia’s book - This Period In My Life.*
- Hormones..!
- Suggestions for what parents / carers can do to help prepare their daughter / charge for their period.
- Which period products are best to start off with.
Links
Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Saskia - @factsoflife.ed / @thisperiodinmylife
www.saskiaboujo.com
This period in my life by Saskia Boujo – use the discount code ‘Teens15’ for 15% off!*
Saskia’s recommended books
Own your period by Chella Quint
Period.: Everything you need to know about periods by Natalie Burn..
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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Everyone’s circumstances are different, but keeping your child / children as your priority is key to ensuring they don’t get caught up in it all. In this episode we talk about:
- What co-parenting is.
- How to communicate with children that you are separating and what is going to happen.
- How to keep the child as your priority and the importance of compartmentalising that side of your life.
- Why being honest is really important.
- Your child’s relationship with the other parent – how will it change and what can you do to support it?
- Communication – keeping it civil and constructive – easier said than done, but so important!
- What can be done if you struggle to make it work between you both.
- A co-parenting plan – what is it and what goes in?
- The emotions...for everyone!
Our apologies for the background whirring during this episode – Becks’ lap top fan was having a funny 5 minutes (or so..!)
Links
Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Organisations which might be able to help and support:
- https://www.familylives.org.uk/advice/divorce-and-separation/
- https://www.children1st.org.uk/help-for-families/parentline-scotland/guidance-advice/separation-and-divorce/(for those in Scotland)
- https://www.parentingni.org (for those in Northern Ireland)
- https://www.gingerbread.org.uk
- https://fnf.org.uk
- https://www.relate.org.uk/relationship-help/help-family-life-and-parenting/stepfamilies
Our blog: How do I make co-parenting work?
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
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Emma works with families and children to support them with fussy eating and allergies. She spoke to us about her own experiences including:
- The challenges of having a child with allergies.
- How Emma supports families and children and how fussy eating and allergies can often go together.
- Coping with allergies at events like birthday parties.
- Some of the different reasons that children can be fussy eaters.
- The ‘neophobic stage’ (fear of new foods).
- Some ideas of how to make mealtimes fun!
- And finally Emma’s top 3 tips for families who have fussy eaters.
Links
Instagram -@dietitian.withadifference
Emma’s website
Books for children:
The runaway pea
The story of a carrot crunching dinosaur
Up in the garden and down in the dirt
For parents and carers:
Anxious Eaters, Anxious Mealtimes: Practical and Compassionate Strategies
for Mealtime Peace
Blogs: Our food and weaning blogs
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
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Did you know that 1 in every 65 pregnancies results in a multiple birth?
In this episode of Newborn to Teen and Everything in Between we spoke to Shauna Leven, CEO of Twins Trust about:
- Her role at Twins Trust and what the charity does for parents of multiples.
- The pram chat (it had to be done!). This is certainly a topic which we know so many parents and carers of multiples agonise over!
- Parental judgement and how being a parent of twins actually made this easier for Shauna to ignore!
- The challenges of having more than one baby at once as well as what’s great about having twins, triplets or more.
- What’s at the top of Shauna’s Twins Trust ‘to do’ list and what makes her proud in terms of the work Twins Trust are doing.
- Shauna’s 4 top tips for multiple parents.
- And finally, where to find information and resources from Twins Trust.
Links: Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily @TwinsTrust
Twins Trust
Our blogs: Read them here
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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Around 10,800 people in the UK have Cystic Fibrosis, which is 1 in every 2,500 babies born.
Cystic Fibrosis affects around 100,000 people in the world.
- Jess is a Norland Nanny who nannied for 12 years before setting off as a blogger on a travelling adventure - little did she know at the time what she would face once her precious baby was born and they received the results of the newborn heel prick test.
- Jess talks to us about how it felt to receive the news that her baby Ottilie had Cystic Fibrosis.
- She explains what this meant, from diagnosis to medication, the CF team, support for CF families and life with CF at home.
(We recorded this podcast with Jess in March – now it is August, the weather has certainly got better!)
Links: Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily @thelittledreameruk @cftrustuk
Cystic Fibrosis Trust
Our blogs: Read them here
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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Claire and Becks have different experiences of sibling rivalry, but whatever your experience, there is no doubt that there is an element of it in every family where there is more than one child! In this episode we chat through the different aspects of this, including:
- How sibling rivalry is a completely natural part of child development that can start at different ages and stages.
- Why it’s important to remember to look at the situation from all of the children’s perspectives and how to make a plan from this!
- The benefits of having a sibling (and a bit of rivalry!)
- Meeting (all of) your children’s needs – how to do this (spoiler alert – sometimes you can’t!).
- Carving out individual time with each of your children - how and why?
- And finally, when (and when not to) step in!
Links: Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Our blogs: Sibling blogs
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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We didn’t realise quite how much there was to talk about on this topic until we pressed record...this includes:
- How our own experiences effect our feelings about children starting school.
- Some things to think about before they start (things like ‘can they open their lunchbox’ for example can be practiced by having picnics over the summer)
- Emotions – a mix of emotions are completely natural and why it’s important not to worry if your little one doesn’t always feel happy about starting school.
- Being brave! What you can do to become a part of the school community.
- The first day - at the start of the day and at the end (don’t underestimate how tired they will be!)
- Some things you can do to get your little one to talk about their day (although we can’t guarantee they will work!!).
Links: Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Our blogs: School blogs
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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As long-time admirers of Charlotte’s work we were so excited for this episode and it didn’t disappoint!
We chat with Charlotte about:
- How she became a nutritionist and why she loves the early years so much.
- The emotions around food from both children and adults as well as how things have changed since we were all small!
- Why what we do in the early years really matters.
- Why we need to take notice of children’s appetites and what might affect them.
- What it was like to write a Sunday Times Best seller!
- Charlotte shared her favourite recipes from the new books, what she would cook for a dinner party and her top 3 tips for feeding babies and young children.
- Her career highlight so far (there are lots 😊)
- And of course... what it was like working with Joe Wicks!
Links:
- Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
- Charlotte’s Instagram - @SR_Nutrition
- Charlotte’s website
- How to wean your baby - Charlotte’s Sunday Times best selling book!
- How to feed your toddler – Charlotte's latest book (out 29th September 2022)
- Charlotte’s ‘creamy lemony salmon bake’ recipe!
- Our food and weaning blogs: Food and weaning
- Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
- ‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
Our GDPR privacy policy was updated on August 8, 2022. Visit acast.com/privacy for more information.
Travelling with children has its ups and downs (Becks has experienced a fair few of them!) and in this episode we talk about our our own experiences and share some tips for a hassle free holiday:
- The importance of research and planning before you go!
- Packing (Claire has so many hints and tips on this having packed for countless families travelling all over the world!)
- The destination – what do you need to consider?
- Sunscreen – the bane of any holidaying parent / carer’s lives… we share our top tips!
- Flying with children (having trained Etihad Airlines Cabin Crew on this very topic Claire knows a thing or two!)
- Coping with jet lag and sleep while away
Links: Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Blogs: Travel
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
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This episode covers so much! We talked to Charlotte about:
- What speech and language therapy is.
- What reasons a parent or carer might have for looking at speech and language therapy for their child and what signs to look for.
- The links between communication and behaviour.
- Speech and language milestones at different ages.
- What you can do at home if your child isn’t meeting one or more of the speech and language development milestones.
- Where to get help in the first instance if you have any concerns.
- ...and so much more!
Links: Instagram - @bespokefamily / Instagram - @speechtherapywithcharlotte / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Blogs:https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/blog
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’
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We talk through all aspects of the transition from cot to bed including:
- What age is typical for a little one to be ready to make the move.
- Some signs which might indicate that your little one is ready!
- How to handle the move from a cot to a bed if you have a new sibling on the way.
- What you should do if you are about to move house (ignore Becks’s misguided wisdom on this one!).
- How to prepare children for moving from cot to bed.
- Making the bedroom safe – what is good to do?
- The big day – what happens??
- Bed guards, duvets and pillows etc.
- And finally...what to do if your little one keeps getting out of bed!
Links: Useful books and resources / Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Blog: Moving your child from their cot to a bed
Webinar: Your Guide to Sleep (get 25% off this and all our guides with the discount code ‘PODCAST’)
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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Cheryl has 2 sons – William who is 14 and Stanley who is 7. William is a self-professed ‘geek’ who loves history and playing games, Stanley is full of energy and wants to be Bear Gryls! They have a love / hate relationship like most siblings, but where their situation is slightly different to most, William has autism.
We talk to Cheryl about:
- What the signs were that indicated that William may be autistic.
- Why it’s important to look at the whole picture.
- How children (especially girls) can mask symptoms as they grow older.
- Stimming – what this is and why children on the autistic spectrum might do it.
- What it was like to receive William’s diagnosis.
- Her hopes for Williams future and what she would say to someone who just received a diagnosis.
Links: National Autistic Society / Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Cheryl’s website: Aperion SEND Training and Consultancy
Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Get 25% off any of our Guides (downloadable webinars) with the code 'PODCAST'.
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It’s time to play wee and poo bingo 😉!
The overall theme of our conversation with Alina was around the importance of talking to our children positively about wee and poo (Bingo!), but also helping them (and us) to understand what’s ‘normal’ in terms of toileting so that they (and we) know, for example, when they might be constipated.
Other topics we talked about include:
- Constipation – the signs to look for.
- Concerns about toilet training and reasons why this might not be going as smoothly as you’d hoped.
- The effect that constipation can have on behaviour.
- Withholding (wee and poo) – why can this happen and what you can do to help.
- The many resources and support available from ERIC.
Links: ERIC website / bespokefamily.co.uk / Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Blog: Toilet Training blogs
Webinar: Your Guide to Toilet Training (get 25% off this and all our guides with the discount code ‘PODCAST’)
1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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What do you do if ‘well meaning’ friends and family tell you that your little one just needs to ‘get on with it’ when all they want to do is be with you? This is the challenge Claire puts to Becks - in response she talks about what it was like when her own children were little and how she might approach this phase differently given what she knows now.
They also talk about:
- How separation anxiety is a normal phase of development
- Why children have separation anxiety (an explanation of people / object permanence right here!)
- How you know whether your child has separation anxiety and how old children typically are when they go through it.
- The link between the survival brain (fight, flight, freeze) and separation anxiety.
- Why we expect children to ‘go off and play’ with children they may never have met – how would we feel about the same kind of situation as adults?!
- What you can try to help your little one through this phase.
Links: bespokefamily.co.uk / Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Blog: Separation anxiety blogs
1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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In ‘Challenge Becks’ Claire asks what Becks would do if she had a child who was biting other children at nursery – but does she know what to do? (Is she really the Karate Kid ;-)?!)
They also talk about:
- Biting being a normal and natural behaviour which is really common in pre-school (and sometimes older) children.
- What the triggers for biting might be and the fact that children don’t always understand (or even know!) what they are doing.
- The best way to respond when your child bites another child or adult (...or you!).
- Ways to support your child to help them stop biting.
- How to work with nursery if your child is biting other children there.
- The fact that it isn’t a reflection on your parenting if your child does bite and how empathy and understanding for parents whose child does bite is really important.
Links: bespokefamily.co.uk / Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Blog: Why does my child bite?
A link to some books you might find helpful is here.
1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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Once again we start this episode with a ‘Challenge Becks’ - What would she do if she was on a walk with children and came across an animal which had died? They also talk about:
- How both Claire and Becks’s upbringings were in environments where their parent’s jobs meant they were very open in terms of life and death and how this has influenced their own outlooks on death and bereavement.
- The importance of being open with children about death and what can happen if we aren’t.
- The fact that died, dead and dying are tough words to hear but that it is what it is. That it’s important to talk about death and use terminology which helps children with literal understanding.
- The age that children might understand the finality of death.
- What you want your child to believe happens when someone has died and how it’s important to let school / nursery know this particularly if it is someone close to them.
- Claire’s top 3 tips.
Links: bespokefamily.co.uk / Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Blogs: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/blog/category/Bereavement
Book recommendations
Other resources and links:
Winston’s Wish (free helpline 08088202021)
Marie Curie
Child bereavement UK
Maggie’s Centres
Child bereavement network
Young Minds
Sands
Plan If - http://planif.org.uk/home.aspx
1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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For Challenge Becks in this episode Claire tasks Becks with a scenario where she has a 14 month old that wakes at 5am – Becks has lots of experience of early risers with her own children but 14 years on what would she do now?
They also discuss:
- How early is early?!
- Why children wake up early including a checklist of things to look for.
- Whether it’s OK to have a lie in for your little ones at the weekend if they choose to sleep in?
- If we should expect all children to sleep 7-7 regardless of their age and stage?
Links: bespokefamily.co.uk / Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Blogs: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/blog/theearlyriser
1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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This episode is for nannies, nanny employers, people thinking about being a nanny or a nanny employer and anyone who is just fascinated by the world of nannying!
Claire and Becks discuss:
- Finding the right job, or the right nanny – it's a bit like dating!
- How working as a nanny (or employing a nanny) is so different to childcare in a nursery or childminder setting (you may see each other in your PJs for a start!).
- Whether you really do need to be on the same page as your employer when it comes to supporting behaviour.
- If nanny can ever really be part of the family, including maintaining professional boundaries and why these are so important.
- What happens when the children just want the nanny? And how leaving a nannying job is always the hardest part.
- Communication - the single most important thing in the nanny / employer relationship.
- And finally, Claire’s top tips for someone thinking about becoming a nanny and for families looking at employing a nanny for the first time.
Links: bespokefamily.co.uk / Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Blogs: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/blog
1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Your Guide to... (downloadable webinars): https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/shop Get 25% off any of our guides with the code 'PODCAST'.
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In this episode Claire and Becks cover:
- Bump to baby – this is a HUGE concept and one which little ones can find very hard to comprehend! They discuss how to help them with this concept and what to do around a child who doesn’t show much interest at all!
- The questions around bringing a new baby home when you have other little people to consider – should you buy a present from baby? What do you do about the baby’s room? How far in advance do you need to make changes before baby arrives? And more!
- What happens on the actual day – who is looking after your other children and what happens when they come in to see you in hospital? And how about a home birth?
- Visitors and how to make sure they help (and not hinder) the whole process!
- Finally, they talk about how sibling children may experience jealousy and the fear of missing out when a new baby arrives and what you can do to help them.
Links: bespokefamily.co.uk / Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Blogs: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/blog/introducinganewbaby / https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/blog/why-doesnt-my-toddler-like-their-new-sibling
1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
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There is no challenge Becks for this episode – as a teenage parent of two 15 year olds, there is enough to talk about!
Claire and Becks explore:
- How things change when your children become teenagers in terms of your ‘control’ over their lives – becoming a ‘Consultant’ rather than a ‘Manager’.
- Why your relationship with a teenager is in some ways very similar to the relationship you had with them as toddlers – this is all about brain development and helping them to learn life skills.
- What it’s like being a teenager (especially now!) and some of the challenges they face in their day to day lives.
- Honesty and trust – how do we foster this in our relationships with our teenagers?
- Taking risks – can you still have boundaries and if so, how do you implement them without being overbearing?
- And finally …why are they soooo messy?!
Links – bespokefamily.co.uk / Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Our Tweens and Teens blogs: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/blog/category/Tweens+and+Teens
Your Guide to Tweens and Teens (downloadable webinar): https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/shop/tweensandteens Get 25% off this and any of our guides with the code 'PODCAST'.
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First of all, how does Becks respond to Claire’s Challenge Becks (and is she a crier..? - still up for debate actually ;-))
They also discuss:
- Why crying is actually a good thing (for so many reasons!)
- Why and how we tend to always link crying to something negative, when actually there are so many positive things associated with it (and we also cry happy tears!).
- How to respond when a child is crying and whether we should show our children that we cry too.
- What we are teaching our children in the way we respond to their cries (and don’t forget that they will be looking after us when we are old 😉!)?
- Finally, some tips about how to manage our own stress around crying.
Links: Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Blogs: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/blog
Helplines: Cry-sis - https://www.cry-sis.org.uk ICON - https://iconcope.org
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Claire and Becks’s conversation in this episode covers:
- Challenge Becks - this time it’s all about how to adapt activities when you have children of different ages - see how she does!
- What it means when we say that play is child’s work and what skills they are learning from it.
- That it isn’t ‘just play’ - there is soooo much more!
- What you do if you find playing with your children really hard (and let’s face it sometimes a bit boring!).
p.s. (Don’t be alarmed - we didn’t do bomb making in our corporate day - it was actually a team building pretend ‘bomb’ detonation exercise 🤣!)
Links: bespokefamily.co.uk / Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Blogs: Play
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Mince pies in hand, Claire and Becks talk about:
- Their own family Christmases and what it was like when they were small.
- The lead up to the big day – is this bigger than the day itself?!
- Late nights, excited early wakeups, naps and bedtime – how to manage sleep over Christmas!
- Food – is it all just mince pies and chocolate? (Turkey trivia - Turkey contains L-tryptophan, an amino acid that's often linked with sleep. It encourages serotonin production in your brain which makes you feel relaxed and sleepy!)
- Presents and Father Christmas – what do you do when your little one asks for a special dust to make her teddies come alive..?!
Links – bespokefamily.co.uk / Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Christmas blog
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The episode begins with a ‘Challenge Becks’ - as a parent of teens with no childcare training, Claire challenges Becks with a scenario to see how she approaches it, guiding her along the way. They also chat about:
- Why we find this stage so tricky!
- The fact that behaviour is ALL about emotion
- Some real life scenarios / examples of toddler tantrums and how to approach them!
Links – bespokefamily.co.uk / Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
Behaviour blogs
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The episode begins with Challenge Becks - how does she do? Claire and Becks go on to discuss the signs that show when a child is ready to potty train with some great tips for how to tell, as well as:
- Where do you start?!
- What about at night and should you take your little one for a ‘dream wee’?
- Claire's 3 top tips for potty training
- Oh, and some discussion about being raised by wolves (don’t ask...!)
Toilet training blogs
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bespokefamily.co.uk / Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
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Claire and Becks have known each other for nearly 14 years – they became friends when working together and in 2018 they decided to set up Bespoke Family. Join them as they discuss:
- Their careers and how they got to where they are today
- Claire’s nanny story – how it all started
- Their volunteer work for Twins Trust
- Why they decided to set up Bespoke Family
- What’s in a name? How they decided on Bespoke Family!
- Their view on things family and child related
bespokefamily.co.uk / Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily
This is the trailer for Toddler to Teen and Everything Inbetween, a brand new podcast brought to you by Becks and Claire, founders of family consultancy business Bespoke Family.
Becks and Claire will be bringing you honest chats about how to communicate with the children in your life, and some of the challenges you might come up against with them. No rules here, just judgement-free guidance.
Subscribe now for fun, practical and educational content coming soon, to help you navigate the world of parenting and childcare. Keep your eye out for the very first episode, where Becks and Claire tell you more about what to expect from Toddler to Ten and Everything Inbetween, introduce themselves in more detail and share why they do what they do.
Find out more about Becks and Claire online at: www.bespokefamily.co.uk./ Instagram: @bespokefamily / Search Bespoke Family on Facebook
This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative: www.decibellecreative.com / Instagram: @decibelle_creative
Our GDPR privacy policy was updated on August 8, 2022. Visit acast.com/privacy for more information.