BBXX: Let's Get Intimate!: Recent Episodes
Sasza Lohrey
A podcast challenging the way our culture conditions us to talk about sex, intimacy, and healthy relationships. Join us for provocative and entertaining conversations with experts- and leave with insight that will transform you and your relationships.
Dr. Kate Balestrieri is a sex-positive therapist whose clinical focus is to help people heal from trauma, establish healthy boundaries, build effective communication strategies, improve relationships, and enhance their sex lives. Her work places extra emphasis on the connection between thoughts, feelings, and physical sensations in order to help people create transformation in their lives and relationships through the mind-body connection.
Guided by the synthesis of multiple theoretical approaches—including psychodynamic, affect regulation, interpersonal neurobiological, attachment focused, cognitive behavioral, somatic and systemic principles—she incorporates evidenced-based research into her counseling services.
Dr. Kate Balestrieri is also the Founder of the platform Modern Intimacy, which provides an inclusive space for people to get access to education about important but stigmatized topics that people live with every day, related to trauma, relationships, sexual health, and sexual sexual problems.
In our conversation, we explore different definitions of pleasure, joy, and contentment—and the importance of challenging our default definitions of everyday terms. We discuss the relationship between sexual pleasure and non-sexual pleasure, how pleasure is something we are innately capable of yet culturally conditioned away from, the role of shame and self-sabotage, and how we can cultivate a pleasure practice to reclaim pleasure in our lives.
Dr. Jeremy Goldberg is a PhD scholar who spent the past five years studying the science of human behavior, specifically how attitudes affect action and how we can communicate to inspire greater and lasting change. He is a TEDx speaker, coach, founder of Love Distance Love Bombs and host of The Long Distance Love Bombs Podcast.
We talk about how to stop being afraid of standing up for yourself or having hard conversations, learn how to ask for what you want and express your needs with confidence, step into your power and care less about what other people think, and how to understand and unpack the stories we tell ourselves in order to get the life we want as a result.
Dr. Amy Moors research focuses on issues related to gender, sexuality, diversity, and well-being. For example, examining diverse expressions of sexuality, including how stigma affects well-being among sexual minorities and people engaged in consensually non-monogamous relationships. Her research has been featured in TIME, Scientific American, and The Atlantic.
In addition to serving on the faculty at Chapman University, Dr. Moors is a Research Fellow at The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University and the co-chair of the American Psychological Association’s Division 44 Consensual Non-Monogamy Task Force.
We discuss the meaning of consensual non-monogamy (CNM), important terms and terminology, misconceptions about CNM relationships, how CNM and monogamous relationships are similar vs. different, what we can learn from types of relationships different from our own, and some of the surprising findings from her research.
Sasza was recently interviewed by Stella Stephanopoulos as a guest on the Everyday Endorphins podcast. We received so much positive feedback from it that we decided to reshare it here on the BBXX podcast!
Stella interviews Sasza about building a deeper understanding of ourselves and how the relationship with ourselves is the pathway towards creating deeper, more intimate, relationships with others. They explore why many people tend to find romantic partners when they least expect it, what it means to date intentionally, the role of patience and timing, and how Sasza manifested her partner through a love letter. They also discuss self care as a form of self respect and how we all embody yin and yang energy in different ways.
We talk about the mind-body connection, high performance habits, breaking down old beliefs, how to move from a state of mental stress to mental strength, and how to work towards the ultimate goal of success without sacrifice. We also share tips for how to design a “sensory diet” in order to escape from the overstimulation that plagues our modern day-to-day lives.
Dr. Blossom is a doctor of occupational therapy and high performance coach. She works with high-achievers and high-achieving organizations and leverages the latest science and research related to the body-mind connection in order to demonstrate how the power of your brain paired with high performance habits can radically reshape the direction of your life and work.
We talk about the mind-body connection, how to influence our bodies through our mind—and inversely—how to influence our mind through our body.
We explore what sex represents, the meanings we attach to it, and some common anxieties and fears underlying it. We discuss shame, the purpose it serves, where it originates from, and ways to liberate ourselves from shame through awareness and exploration of ourselves and our relationship to sex & sexuality.
Arlyn Owens is a psychosexual therapist, educator, and registered nurse. Arlyn provides counseling and therapy around the topics of sexuality, intimacy, and relationships. His areas of expertise include communication, shame and identity, kink, and consensual non-monogamy.
A few months ago, I made up this thought exercise, and I couldn’t get it out of my head. I kept coming back to it, kept feeling relief from it, and kept getting positive feedback from people I had shared it with. It might be a tough pill to swallow, but it’s actually liberating, and it forces a perspective shift that can be game-changing in your relationship.
This is the story that challenged me in a big way—and a really great way. I’ve never thought of blame, accountability, or responsibility the same ever since, and it’s been game-changing in my relationships.
Have you ever felt frustrated with where you are in life? How did you get to where you are now? Did you choose the life you’re currently living or did it sort of happen by default? Have you consciously, intentionally designed the life you are living, or do you feel like things are happening to you and out of your control? These are some of the thought-provoking questions we reflect on as we explore how to live a life by design rather than by default! We talk about how to recognize when you’re not living a life true to yourself, how to understand what your core values are, and how to live in deeper alignment with those values. We share advice for ditching the default life, redefining success and failure, creating goals, building consistent habits, and incorporating more fun and play into your daily life. Kate House believes that “if nothing changes, nothing changes” and seven years ago she decided to change everything. She realized by not changing her circumstances she was actually choosing to stay in them. She left her job to pursue a new path that was better for her health, her family, and her happiness. She is now a certified health coach and host of the “Live By Design” podcast.
Want to experience more positive feelings, a stronger sense of life satisfaction, and less negative emotions in your life? Join us for a conversation to uncover the key ingredients that will maximize your happiness and well-being.
Stella Stephanopoulos is the host of the Everyday Endorphins podcast, which hosts conversations on the nuances of mental health and wellness with the goal of inspiring others to feel empowered to take control of their own wellbeing by focusing on what brings them joy and happiness. Stella has a degree in Philosophy-Neuroscience-Psychology and is a contributing writer for Thrive Global.
We talk about eudaemonic vs. hedonic well-being, positive psychology, type 1 vs. type 2 fun, comparison as the thief of joy, the role of guilt, pride, and shame in hustle culture, how to evaluate your own happiness and wellbeing, and the best habits to help increase your sense of happiness and well-being.
This is Part Three in a series of ongoing conversations with Adriana Robertson and Michael Fenchel about how to co-create your dream relationship.
We talk about how to consciously create spaces for connection to thrive in your relationship, incorporating more fun and play into your relationship routine, and keeping the spark burning.
We talk about how to establish agreements and boundaries that protect your partnership, tips and tricks for weekday or weekend connection rituals, and how to give or receive the gift of “spoiling sessions.”
If you haven’t listened to our previous Humans of Intimacy episodes with Adriana and Michael, or our previous episodes in this series, then be sure to check them out!
This is Part Two in a series of ongoing conversations with Adriana Roberton and Michael Fenchel about how to co-create your dream relationship.
We might think we know everything about our partner, but that’s not actually possible. We’re constantly learning and growing as individuals, and our relationships should also be evolving along with us. Approaching our relationship from a place of curiosity helps us create shared understanding in our relationships, which is one of the most important antidotes to conflict.
We talk about how to get through tough times in a relationship, how to react when you are in the midst of a conflict, proactively preventing conflict through shared understanding, and how to know when it’s worth it to keep investing in your relationship vs. call it quits.
If you haven’t listened to our previous Humans of Intimacy episodes with Adriana and Michael, be sure to check them out!
This is Part One in a series of ongoing conversations with Adriana Roberton and Michael Fenchel about how to co-create your dream relationship.
We talk about the importance of shared understanding, defining agreements in your relationship, and strategies for repairing conflict. We explore desires, fears, and boundaries as a powerful tool for communication, as well as other tips, tricks, and strategies to include in your Couples Toolkit. Most importantly, we explore how to know when a relationship is worth fighting for—and how to recognize if it’s time to walk away.
If you haven’t listened to our previous Humans of Intimacy episodes with Adriana and Michael, be sure to check them out!
What’s one thing that you want to unlearn? Sometimes, it’s less about what we need to learn and more about what we need to unlearn in order to be able to live the life and the relationships that we truly desire.
We talk about the biggest lessons learned from dating, challenges in the relationship with ourselves, the process of unlearning, normalizing the hard and ugly part of the journey, and advice for what to do when it feels like you’re deep in the mud of your own personal development. We explore how to tap into the most authentic version of yourself, how to show up the way you actually want to in relationships, and what it feels like to live in relationships that are aligned with your values.Michael Fenchel is the co-founder of Breathe For Change, the largest yoga teacher training in the United States. He has co-founded and grown four companies including PRDX, a movement dedicated to empowering entrepreneurial leaders to create more belonging and flow in their lives, relationships, and teams.
How many of us have accepted ourselves fully, for everything that we are? Most of us still have a long way to go and many parts of ourselves still yet to be acknowledged let alone accepted. Adriana Robertson has become a master in helping people reclaim the many different pieces of themselves—the good, the bad and the ugly—in order to find wholeness.
We talk about how relationships serve as mirrors to see ourselves in a different way and how we can learn, grow, and heal with another person. We learn how to tap into our intuition, discover our inner wisdom, and create an internal compass in order to better guide ourselves, our decisions, and our relationships.
Adriana has been a Harvard leadership trainer, international development leader, and a coach & facilitator for over 10 years. She is now the co-founder of PRDX, a movement dedicated to empowering entrepreneurial leaders to create more belonging and flow in their lives, relationships, and teams.
This piece of advice will change the way you think every day. It will help you cultivate more empathy for others and more appreciation for yourself in everything you do.
Have you ever felt stuck in "analysis paralysis"? It's time to think differently about how we make decisions. Here's an easy trick so that you can make the right decision—every time. This perspective shift changed my life.
Without realizing it, most of us don’t use these words correctly. While envy tends to seem like just a stronger version of jealousy, the psychology and meaning behind it are of important difference. We love to examine the way that subtle linguistic differences can shape the way we communicate and connect with one another :)
Do you know the difference between giving thanks and expressing gratitude? While similar in some ways, the use cases for each are different and, as always, we love to examine the way that subtle linguistic differences can shape the way we communicate and connect with one another :)
Vitale Buford is an executive coach, international speaker, and author of the book, "Addicted to Perfect," in which she explores her 10-year struggle with Adderall and perfectionism.
If you hear the word "perfectionism" and you don't think it's relevant to you, please have a listen anyway. This episode is going to surprise you.
We talk with Vitale about the deeper issues that perfectionism stems from as we learn about its relationship to self-worth, personal criticism, codependency, abandonment, and its role as a coping mechanism. We also discuss the danger of living a life focused on trying to please others and the consequences of living your life without really knowing who you
Studies of highly creative people and highly successful people, such as the one by the psychologist bestselling author Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, have shown that a dynamic set of seemingly opposing characteristics is a very important part of what makes them tick.
“Contradiction” or perceived cognitive dissonance is hard for our brains to process, so we often categorize the world and people into boxes, think even of our of ourselves as being either at one or the other end or the other of the spectrum for many personality traits. The world isn’t so simple and neither are we. The good news is that our “contradictions” can actually be quite complementary, not only to each other but to our success in life.
We continue the endlessly glorious conversation about sexually connetion as a path to deeper understanding ouselves, the ability to explore more dynamic versions of ourselves, and more connection in our lives - inside and outside the bedroom.
Tune in to learn why you deserve great sex, what the key ingredients are, and how it can positively transform countless other areas of your life!
Join us as we continue to change the culture & the conversation surrounding intimacy and relationships!
¿Cuál es tu definición del amor? Hablamos sobre esta pregunta y más con Lorena Bassani. Lorena es una periodista, entrenadora de conciencias, y pionera blogger. En adición de amor, hablamos sobre definiciones alternas del final feliz, tomar el control de nuestras vidas, como controlar nuestras emociones, y sus cursos.
Whether it’s meeting a new person or talking to someone in our family, there is a point at which (even well-intentioned) questions can come across as uninvited criticisms. How do we walk that fine line while trying to learn about someone else or draw it ourselves when someone else has stepped over our own boundaries?
Wife wants a threesome? Listen to this episode! This week, we’re joined by Dr. Justin Lehmiller, who has our dream job: sex researcher. He joins us to talk about his latest book, Tell Me What You Want, where he surveyed thousands of Americans about their most explicit fantasies. We talk about how sex changes over the lifetime (hint: middle aged sex rocks!), the most common male and female fantasy, how to talk about your sexual fantasies with your partner, and what your fantasies may mean.
Meg Jay, PhD is a Clinical Psychologist and an Associate Professor of Human Development at the University of Virginia. Her books have been translated into more than a dozen languages and her work has appeared in the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, Harvard Business Review and on NPR and BBC.
"Resilience" is of the defining attributes in facing adversity, but resilience isn't just "bouncing back" from a difficult challenge. In fact, resilience might be a lot different than you think—and you might be a lot more resilient than you give yourself credit for. In today's interview with Meg Jay, we talk about why you can't outrun your past, we normalize growing up with adversities, and give advice for how to recognize and reflect on them. We also talk about the importance of life's defining journeys and stages, why history doesn't have to repeat itself, how love heals us, and other healthy coping mechanisms.
Hani Lees Dresner is the Founder of the sex-positive ceramics company, Gashtrays. Hani emphasizes celebration vs exploitation of the naked body in her work and she believes that sex-positivity and body-positivity are crucial steps towards battling sexual and mental health. She sees her work as a “subtle protest” that aims to provoke conversation in a way that is approachable.
We talk about the story behind the Gashtrays movement, her nude-positive family, the hilarity of the human body, and the relationship between sexuality and creativity.
She also talks about us her beautiful handmade vulva and penis artwork and we announce our upcoming virtual workshop on May 1st where you will all have the opportunity to make your very own art to celebrate your body!
Nadia Boltz-Weber is a New York Times Best-Selling author of the book “Shameless: A Sexual Reformation," an ordained Luther Pastor, and the founder of House For All Sinners & Saints.
In our conversation, we dispel the shame that so frequently underlies our beliefs about sex and sexuality. Nadia brings a clever—and extremely comical—point of view to the topic of sex and religion. She argues that sex, sexuality, and pleasure aren't the opposite of religion and what the church stands for. In fact, she argues that, if you look closer, in reality they stand for and value a lot of the same things.
Nadia wants you to love sex and feel no absolutely no shame about it. She wants you to know that whether or not you believe in God—and especially if you do—you're supposed to celebrate it and feel REALLY F*CKING GOOD.
BBXX Founder, Sasza Lohrey, interviews her sister-in-law for a follow-up of our last of Humans of Intimacy, "Teamwork Makes The Dream Work," to get the other side of the story. We talk about her life story, what shaped her view of relationships growing up, common misconceptions of relationships, foundational qualities of a relationship, lessons in communication, the role of luck, how to stay positive in difficult moments, and lessons learning in parenting.
We discuss the five languages of apology, their relationship to the five love languages, tips for a healthy relationship, expressing apology, as well as the power of apology in conflict resolution.
Dr. Jennifer Thomas is a bestselling author, TEDx speaker, leadership consultant, and psychologist who helps people know what to say in any situation, including one of the most complicated situations of them all: when giving an apology.
She has co-authored the book, “When Sorry Isn’t Enough” with Gary Chapman, author of the bestselling book and the world-famous concept of the “5 Love Languages” in which they present relationship-changing research for understanding love, the power of language, forgiveness, the impact of a good apology, and the art of giving an apology in the right “language” in order to be recognized by the person on the receiving end.
"One of my all-time favorite books and a life-changing lesson on communication." —Sasza Lohrey, BBXX Founder
Deborah Tannen is a Professor of Linguistics at Georgetown University and the author of countless books about how the language of everyday conversation affects relationships. We learn about the different ways we each interpret conversations and interactions and break down the foundational concept of individual conversational style. We explore the “metadata” of conversations, demonstrating empathy vs. power, the influence of family in shaping our communication, the role of communication in a partnership, and gender differences in communication styles.
Fact: big wins are impossible without the small wins along the way. "The journey is the destination" might sound cheesy but the reality is that we won't always make it to where we're trying to go. Even if we do, it's vital to acknowledge how much work we put in to get there; the big wins never feel as good if we haven't celebrated the small wins.
Lilly Wang spent two years traveling the world learning about what mental health looks like in different countries and across cultures. She also spent that time developing a much deeper understanding of her own struggles with mental health. As we explore the definition of mental health and how it looks different around the world, we talk with Lilly about the lessons learned from her journey and how travel allows us to discover a more authentic version of ourselves.
We talk with one of our favorite men’s coaches, Mike Sagun, about physical touch, closeness, and male intimacy. We learn about his journey to self-discovery, how he has changed over the past few years along the way, tools for exploring your own identity, and whether or not people can ever truly start over. Lastly, we touch on the art of giving compliments, the vulnerability it requires to give them—and the power in learning to receive them.
We talk with Dr. Jamie Goldstein about the power of story and the practice of narrative therapy. We discuss how stories create meaning, the importance of recognizing that stories are multi-dimensional, and how language shapes our stories and our identities.
We learn about how to identify a “dominant narrative,” separate the person involved from the actual problem itself, and the healing capacity of “externalization.” Lastly, we share tools and actionable advice for exploring aspects of narrative therapy on your own.
Hablamos de la diferencia entre el sexo y la sexualidad, las dinámicas de la sexualidad, la vergüenza y la liberación, la mente como nuestra herramienta más poderosa, el rol clave de la comunicación, la importancia de conocernos a nosotros mismos, y la definición de la intimidad. Nuestra invitada, Michelle Pollmann, es una psicóloga chilena especializada en terapia de pareja con sede en Santiago de Chile.
We talk with Stefanos Sifanos about his personal journey from trauma to healing and continued self-development. We talk about masculinity and femininity, the differences between what is traditionally referred to as masculine vs. feminine energies, and how, in essence, they are simply a range of human characteristics that we all possess and should seek our own personal balance between. We learn about social ecology, men and emotions, the fear of rejection, and what determines self-worth. Stefanos also teaches us about the difference between isolation vs. solitude, its role in healing, and the importance of healing ourselves in order to build healthier relationships with others. Stefanos Sifanos is a love and relationship coach and an expert on masculine and feminine energies.
BBXX Founder Sasza Lohrey interviews her very own brother for the pilot episode of an exciting new sub-series, Humans Of Intimacy. He talks about what influences his view on relationships growing up, how his perspective of relationships has evolved, and what advice he would give to the younger version of himself. He discusses how he learned to express himself emotionally, struggles in the beginning stages of his relationship with his now wife, lessons learned in communication, the role of authenticity, and how to be true to yourself in a partnership.
“Simple” behaviors carry complex meanings. We discuss the keys to a healthy relationship with Dr. Kate Balestrieri. We learn about attachment theory and how it plays out in adult relationships, as well as the role of fear, risk, and vulnerability in relationships. We talk about the definition of trauma, healing, and how to look for relationships that will help you heal so that you can reach a deeper level of intimacy with yourself and others. Dr. Kate Balestrieri is a licensed clinical and forensic psychologist and the founder of Modern Intimacy.
When I decided to watch Boogie Nights with a few friends, I was expecting a comical satire of the porn industry in the ’80s. I was surprised to find that, instead, it was a less comical yet much more profound cultural statement piece that I had expected.
We dive deeper into our discussion of anxiety and self-care as we discuss boundaries, meditation, mindfulness, and journaling with Rashawnda Williams. An expert in self-care, she shares easy, practical steps and actionable advice and tools to deepen your self-understanding and self-development. “Self-care isn’t selfish” might sound cliché but it also happens to be extremely important, healthy advice to live by!
There is no one single path set out for us. There is no single destination where we might end up and be happy. There is no one person that we could build an incredible relationship with. There is not just one "right" decision. And there is no one single version of who we are. Besides, how boring would it be if there were?
We talk with Dr. Earl Turner about accessibility and equity in mental health. We learn about new guidelines focused on intersectionality (gender, age, sexual orientation, etc) as well as new guidelines focused on race and ethnicity. We also discuss stigma as an obstacle to treatment, how to normalize mental health care, the importance of role models, and society’s treatment of the black community. Dr. Earl Turner is a licensed psychologist and professor in Los Angeles. He is a member of the American Psychological Association (APA) and the Association of Black Psychologists (ABPsi), and he was recently elected as the 2020 President of the Society for Child and Family Policy and Practice (APA, Division 37), making him the first African American male to be elected to this position.
We talk with health & wellness influencer Jo Encarnacion (@gofitjo) about childhood, friendship, emotional support, the power of owning your feelings, the importance of authenticity, and how she doesn’t apologize for showing human expression. We hear about her experience coming into her own sexuality, struggles through marriage, and how she gave her daughters “the talk” that we all wish we had gotten.
Dr. Christina Pierpaoli Parker talks with us about the pros and cons of aging—from the psychological benefits to the physical complications. We discuss sexual dysfunction, sexual liberation, the evolving role of sex as we age, how to connect deeper in our relationships later in life, and the life-changing lessons we should all learn from the wisdom of aging. Dr. Christina Pierpaoli Parker is a post-doc in the Clinical Geropsychology doctoral program at the University of Alabama. Her research has been published in the Journals of Aging & Health, Sex & Marital Therapy and The Clinical Gerontologist, and her writing explores psychoeducational interventions for understanding, treating, and improving sexual dysfunction in later life.
Esta semana, conversamos con la emprendedora Estrella Jaramillo sobre la realidad actual de la tecnología orientada a mujeres, la importancia del lenguaje y la comunicación en relaciones, la infidelidad y la nueva monogamia, el papel del hombre en la igualdad de género.
We learn about the history of cohabitation and its impact on marriage vs. divorce and we talk about the evolution of societal norms, gender roles, and hookup culture. Arielle Kuperberg is a millennial generation sociologist whose research examines how social norms in romantic relationships have changed since the ‘60s, with a focus on the intersection of work, family, and gender.
Would you like to be more involved with BBXX? Sign up here [https://bbxx.world/] to be a part of our brand new BBXX platform—a.k.a. your go-to resource for all things intimacy & relationships! You can find the show notes and more resources here https://bbxx.world/podcast/episode-51-the-lies-we-tell-ourselves-about-the-truth/ What does it mean to lie? What does it mean to tell the truth? And what about the gaping grey area in between? Our guest this week, Judi Ketteler, is a storyteller and award-winning writer who has had her work featured by publications such as The New York Times and Runner’s World, among others. She is the author of three non-fiction books, the most recent of which we will be talking about today, called, Would I Lie To You? The Amazing Power of Being Honest in a World That Lies.
Where else you can find us:
SPOTIFY: https://open.spotify.com/show/7xZ5JXfRybUqWL2J9Zggew?si=0hc4o8b5RNmNWdxRvN9vTw APPLE PODCASTS: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bbxx-lets-get-intimate/id1439909189
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Would you like to be more involved with BBXX? Sign up here [https://bbxx.world/] to be a part of our brand new BBXX platform—a.k.a. your go-to resource for all things intimacy & relationships! You can find the show notes and more resources here https://bbxx.world/podcast/episode-49-this-is-actually-happening/ This is the third episode [of four] in our series exploring culture, the media, and sexual exploitation in the U.S. We learn of shocking stories behind the porn mogul PornHub, misconceptions of human trafficking in the porn industry, and what we can do to change the system. Our guest, Laila Mickelwait, has started a petition with over 1.5 million signers hoping to hold Pornhub accountable for profiting off of illegal videos on their site. She has dedicated much of her career to raising awareness of human trafficking and is the Director of Abolition for Exodus Cry, founder of the #Traffickinghub campaign, and President and Founder of New Reality International.
Where else you can find us:
SPOTIFY: https://open.spotify.com/show/7xZ5JXfRybUqWL2J9Zggew?si=0hc4o8b5RNmNWdxRvN9vTw
APPLE PODCASTS: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bbxx-lets-get-intimate/id1439909189
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Our interview with filmmaker Benjamin Nolot is the first in a series of four interviews that explore the relationship between culture, representations of sex in the media and in porn, and sexual exploitation. This interview starts the series off by exploring hookup culture through the lens of one of his documentary films. We begin to examine patterns of the media and social influence—and to understand how strong their power is over us, whether we realize it or not.
Would you like to be more involved with BBXX? Sign up here [https://bbxx.world/] to be a part of our brand new BBXX platform—a.k.a. your go-to resource for all things intimacy & relationships! You can find the show notes and more resources here https://bbxx.world/podcast/episode-48-standing-by-vs-being-an-ally/ This is the second episode [of four] in our series exploring culture, the media, and sexual exploitation in the U.S. “Rape is not exclusively the product of a few bent and twisted minds but a result of [cultural] belief systems.”
In this week’s podcast interview, we discuss the effects of the “rape myth,” the limitations of sexuality and rape-supportive beliefs, the influence of media violence, and the implications of the acceptance of violence against women. Our guest Neil Malamuth is a professor of social studies and communication at UCLA and interdisciplinary social scientist who studies violence and conflict. This episode contains a trigger warning.
Where else you can find us:
SPOTIFY: https://open.spotify.com/show/7xZ5JXfRybUqWL2J9Zggew?si=0hc4o8b5RNmNWdxRvN9vTw
APPLE PODCASTS: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bbxx-lets-get-intimate/id1439909189
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TWITTER: https://twitter.com/bbxx_world
FACEBOOK: https://m.facebook.com/bbxx.world
PINTEREST: https://www.pinterest.ca/bbxx_world/
Would you like to be more involved with BBXX? Sign up here [https://bbxx.world/] to be a part of our brand new BBXX platform—a.k.a. your go-to resource for all things intimacy & relationships! You can find the show notes and more resources here https://bbxx.world/podcast/episode-50-an-industry-of-injustice-4-4/
This is the fourth and final episode in our series exploring culture, the media, and sexual exploitation in the U.S. We started off the series and now wrap up the series by interviewing documentary filmmaker Benjamin Nolot, who is also the Founder of Exodus, an organization fighting to end sexual exploitation and the billion-dollar industry that profits from sex trafficking.
Where else you can find us:
SPOTIFY: https://open.spotify.com/show/7xZ5JXfRybUqWL2J9Zggew?si=0hc4o8b5RNmNWdxRvN9vTw APPLE PODCASTS: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bbxx-lets-get-intimate/id1439909189
INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/bbxx.world/
TWITTER: https://twitter.com/bbxx_world
FACEBOOK: https://m.facebook.com/bbxx.world
PINTEREST: https://www.pinterest.ca/bbxx_world/
“Communication is the bedrock to make your bed rock.” Dr. Laurie Mintz shares wisdom about mindfulness as a powerful tool for sex, stress, pandemics, and life in general. We would truly appreciate your feedback. Please help us build a better BBXX for you by sending your questions, comments, or criticisms to hello@bbxx.world or by texting +1 (415) 888-4742 :)
Sometimes we have a conversation with another person about one concept that has two very different meanings for each of us. More often, we don't even realize it. It’s such a simple concept yet one that can completely transform the way we communicate with and understand other people.
We would truly appreciate your feedback. Please help us build a better BBXX for you by sending your questions, comments, or criticisms to hello@bbxx.world or by texting +1 (415) 888-4742 :)
As hard as we might try to forget or "get over" things, the body still remembers them. Studies show that suppressing emotions can do damage not only to our psychological health but also to our physical health. We would truly appreciate your feedback. Please help us build a better BBXX for you by sending your questions, comments, or criticisms to hello@bbxx.world or by texting +1 (415) 888-4742 :)
In our conversation with Nati Valderrama, we talk about how health and nutrition affect our relationships, how to portray your authentic self, social media vs. real life, and what it means to lead a “balanced” life. Nati Valderrama is a bilingual Health and Wellness Coach who works with clients around the world to find balance in their lives. She teaches workshops in both English and Spanish and is based in Santiago, Chile.
Help us build a better BBXX for you by sending your feedback to hello@bbxx.world :)
Whether writing a thank you note to a neighbor, a love letter to a partner, or slipping someone a piece of paper with your phone number on it, handwritten notes can serve not only to deepen existing relationships but also to create new opportunities for connection. Aficionado Lauren Popish teaches us how to rediscover connection through the lost art of letter writing. We would love to know what you think. Please help us build a better BBXX for you by sending your feedback to hello@bbxx.world :)
In an attempt to better understand other people, we might attribute their behaviors to inherent personality traits or specific circumstances. But guess what? Like most things, we're often much farther off the mark than we'd like to believe. We would love to know what you think. Please help us build a better BBXX for you by sending your feedback to hello@bbxx.world :)
An introduction to our new series, “Food For Thought”! Please send feedback to hello@bbxx.world :)
Our interview with Dr. Terry Kupers delves into mental health and prison, specifically, the extreme conditions of isolation in solitary confinement and the effects of these conditions on the human psyche. This interview is by no means meant to compare what we are experiencing in quarantine with the extreme conditions that one experiences inside correctional facilities—let alone solitary confinement. However, it is meant to give us some perspective, help us better understand a bit more about the human condition, and perhaps give us a new lens with which to understand ourselves, each other, and systems in our society that need reform.
Some of the biggest regrets in life are not the things we say but the things that are left unsaid. What are the conversations you will look back and wish you would have had?
Morgan Brown, Founder of "Conversations I Wish I Had" and Sasza Lohrey, Founder of BBXX, share their personal experiences with loss in the most raw, vulnerable interview thus far on the BBXX podcast.
Some of the biggest regrets in life are not the things we say but the things that are left unsaid. What are the conversations you will look back and wish you would have had?
Morgan Brown, Founder of "Conversations I Wish I Had" and Sasza Lohrey, Founder of BBXX, share their personal experiences with loss in the most raw, vulnerable interview thus far on the BBXX podcast.
How to Mindfully Navigate Fear + Anxiety during the COVID-19 pandemic.
A guest workshop hosted by Michelle, the founder of Holisticism, featuring Amanda Huggins, a professional anxiety coach and the founder of Anxiety to Empowerment.
IG: @holisticism & @anxietytoempowerment
Owen Marcus is a men’s coach and the Co-founder of Evryman, a company focused on men’s emotional wellness with the purpose of destigmatizing men’s vulnerability and empowering individuals to build deeper connections. He teaches us how some of our biggest “problems” are unhealthy coping mechanisms that we have unknowingly adopted. He talks about the role of physical/somatic experience in shaping emotional experience, how suppressing our emotions creates PTSD pathways in our brains, and the power of "changing your mind” over “learning new techniques.”
Lastly, we talk about how connection is the essence of being human, what it takes to achieve deeper connections, the benefits of emotionally risk-taking, and actionable advice for how people, men in particular, can cultivate better emotional intelligence.
In this week’s episode, we talk with Alexandra Fine, Co-founder & CEO of Dame Products. We discuss the importance of getting to know all the different versions of ourselves, how to acknowledge the contradictions within each of us, and whether people can actually change. We talk about sex as a part of society, the power of cultural influences, and the limitations of binary thinking. We learn about Dame’s mission to close the "pleasure gap"—and the dangerous implications of a discriminatory advertising industry that continually censors content related to female sexual wellbeing.
In case you didn’t know, BBXX suffers from this, too! Instagram frequently rejects any promotional ads we attempt because of a totally vague blanket ban on "inappropriate content," which apparently includes anything even remotely related to living healthy relationships in general :(
PS. GET 15% OFF DAME PRODUCTS WITH THE CODE BBXX15
You probably don’t know much about menopause… and the things that you do know might be based on stereotypes more than actual facts. That’s because, unfortunately, despite being an important—and inevitable—life stage for literally every woman on earth, it hasn’t been studied very much! (shocker) In this week’s interview, we talk with Jill Angelo about the myths and stigmas of menopause, the lack of resources and support for women going through it (aka, eventually, all women), and the ways in which we can all—men, women, and folx—better normalize and create greater visibility surrounding this transformational life stage. In case you think this isn't relevant to you—think again.
Jill Angelo is the CEO and founder of Gennev, a company dedicated to bringing the world a better menopause experience. Their online hub features resources from educational materials to menopause health coaches, telemedicine appointments, and wellness products.
Named as one of Inc. Magazine’s 2016 Most Impressive Women Entrepreneurs, Jill is a driving force for bringing effective health solutions, information and resources to women during some of the most vibrant years of their lives.
You probably don’t know much about menopause… and the things that you do know might be based on stereotypes more than actual facts. That’s because, unfortunately, despite being an important—and inevitable—life stage for literally every woman on earth, it hasn’t been studied very much! (shocker) In this week’s interview, we talk with Jill Angelo about the myths and stigmas of menopause, the lack of resources and support for women going through it (aka, eventually, all women), and the ways in which we can all—men, women, and folx—better normalize and create greater visibility surrounding this transformational life stage. In case you think this isn't relevant to you—think again.
Jill Angelo is the CEO and founder of Gennev, a company dedicated to bringing the world a better menopause experience. Their online hub features resources from educational materials to menopause health coaches, telemedicine appointments, and wellness products.
Named as one of Inc. Magazine’s 2016 Most Impressive Women Entrepreneurs, Jill is a driving force for bringing effective health solutions, information and resources to women during some of the most vibrant years of their lives.
In this week’s conversation with Stephanie Coontz, we discuss the history of marriage, its social and political significance, and the changing paradigm in the modern world. We learn about the factors surrounding marital and sexual satisfaction, the importance of egalitarianism, and the lessons to be learned from single people and same-sex couples. Lastly, we speak to the importance of cultivating a sense of community and trust through casual connections and small interactions—particularly in today’s perpetually disconnected world—and the ways in which putting more energy into interactions with friends, coworkers, and even strangers can actually help strengthen our romantic partnerships.
Stephanie Coontz is the author of five books on gender, family, and history, including Marriage, A History: How Love Conquered Marriage, which was cited in the US Supreme Court decision on marriage equality. She is a Director for the Council on Contemporary Families, as well as emeritus faculty of History and Family Studies at The Evergreen State College in Washington.
In this week’s conversation with Stephanie Coontz, we discuss the history of marriage, its social and political significance, and the changing paradigm in the modern world. We learn about the factors surrounding marital and sexual satisfaction, the importance of egalitarianism, and the lessons to be learned from single people and same-sex couples. Lastly, we speak to the importance of cultivating a sense of community and trust through casual connections and small interactions—particularly in today’s perpetually disconnected world—and the ways in which putting more energy into interactions with friends, coworkers, and even strangers can actually help strengthen our romantic partnerships.
Stephanie Coontz is the author of five books on gender, family, and history, including Marriage, A History: How Love Conquered Marriage, which was cited in the US Supreme Court decision on marriage equality. She is a Director for the Council on Contemporary Families, as well as emeritus faculty of History and Family Studies at The Evergreen State College in Washington.
In our conversation with Nick Epley, we discover how little we know ourselves, how much less we know other people, and yet how incredibly good we think we are at both. We learn about the power of context in shaping our feelings, the importance of reciprocity, the magic of gratitude, and how all of these play a role in “designing a good life.”
Nick Epley is a Professor of Behavior Science and Director of the Center for Decision Research at the University of Chicago Booth School of Business. He teaches an ethics and happiness course to MBA students called “Designing a Good Life” and he studies social cognition to understand why smart people so routinely misunderstand each other.
In our conversation with Nick Epley, we discover how little we know ourselves, how much less we know other people, and yet how incredibly good we think we are at both. We learn about the power of context in shaping our feelings, the importance of reciprocity, the magic of gratitude, and how all of these play a role in “designing a good life.”
Nick Epley is a Professor of Behavior Science and Director of the Center for Decision Research at the University of Chicago Booth School of Business. He teaches an ethics and happiness course to MBA students called “Designing a Good Life” and he studies social cognition to understand why smart people so routinely misunderstand each other.
In our latest interview for our new “Changemakers” edition of the podcast, we’re joined by health and wellness guru Jo Encarnacion, a.k.a. @GoFitJo. We talk about battling depression through health and fitness, intimacy vs. sex, the double-edged sword of social media, lessons from parenthood, and the wisdom of womanhood. We learn about how to embrace imperfection, the power of viewing rejection as "redirection," and the reality that we are all a constantly-evolving "work in progress."
In our latest interview for our new “Changemakers” edition of the podcast, we’re joined by health and wellness guru Jo Encarnacion, a.k.a. @GoFitJo. We talk about battling depression through health and fitness, intimacy vs. sex, the double-edged sword of social media, lessons from parenthood, and the wisdom of womanhood. We learn about how to embrace imperfection, the power of viewing rejection as "redirection," and the reality that we are all a constantly-evolving "work in progress."
In our interview with Dan Doty, we discuss the therapeutic benefits of nature, the importance of healing old wounds, and the power of presence. We also explore why society has taught us all—but particularly men—to use repression as a coping tactic. Our biggest takeaway? Hurt people hurt others. Trauma shapes who we are, how we react to situations, and even the way our genes express themselves. The good news? People who work on healing themselves have an immense capability to help others heal others.
Dan Doty is a men's coach and the co-founder of Evryman, a men’s retreat program that focuses on emotional wellness to destigmatize men’s vulnerability and empower individuals to build deeper connections.
In our interview with Dan Doty, we discuss the therapeutic benefits of nature, the importance of healing old wounds, and the power of presence. We also explore why society has taught us all—but particularly men—to use repression as a coping tactic. Our biggest takeaway? Hurt people hurt others. Trauma shapes who we are, how we react to situations, and even the way our genes express themselves. The good news? People who work on healing themselves have an immense capability to help others heal others.
Dan Doty is a men's coach and the co-founder of Evryman, a men’s retreat program that focuses on emotional wellness to destigmatize men’s vulnerability and empower individuals to build deeper connections.
In this week’s interview with Mike Sagun we talk about masculinity—from boyhood to manhood. We deconstruct toxic masculinity and discuss how to nurture more emotionally fit men, from awareness programs in youth to promoting connection for happiness and longevity later in life. We also talk about the healing power of owning your failures and flaws, the definition of living authentically, and we learn how to craft our own purpose statement and discover our “ikigai.” Mike Sagun is a men’s coach and the founder of The Unshakable Man, an organization focused on men’s total health & wellness, success, purpose, and fulfillment. Their mission statement expresses, “we believe a man must be introduced to various perspectives, experiences, and ideas in order to discover new and different ways of being a man. This is how a man challenges his sense of self and becomes unshakable.”
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If you've enjoyed listening, please take ONE minute to write a review for our podcast! We would sincerely appreciate it.
We would also love to hear your feedback. There is a survey on our website or you can email hello@bbxx.world. Any questions, concerns, ideas, or suggestions are always more than welcome!
To check out the show notes from our podcast episodes and learn more about BBXX, visit bbxx.world.
In this week’s interview with Mike Sagun we talk about masculinity—from boyhood to manhood. We deconstruct toxic masculinity and discuss how to nurture more emotionally fit men, from awareness programs in youth to promoting connection for happiness and longevity later in life. We also talk about the healing power of owning your failures and flaws, the definition of living authentically, and we learn how to craft our own purpose statement and discover our “ikigai.” Mike Sagun is a men’s coach and the founder of The Unshakable Man, an organization focused on men’s total health & wellness, success, purpose, and fulfillment. Their mission statement expresses, “we believe a man must be introduced to various perspectives, experiences, and ideas in order to discover new and different ways of being a man. This is how a man challenges his sense of self and becomes unshakable.”
_________________________________
If you've enjoyed listening, please take ONE minute to write a review for our podcast! We would sincerely appreciate it.
We would also love to hear your feedback. There is a survey on our website or you can email hello@bbxx.world. Any questions, concerns, ideas, or suggestions are always more than welcome!
To check out the show notes from our podcast episodes and learn more about BBXX, visit bbxx.world.
In our interview with Dr. Robert Weiss, we learn what it means to be an “addict,” how narcissistic tendencies perpetuate addiction, and what our upbringing has subconsciously taught us about healthy relationships and dependency. We also discuss the importance of a support system in the process of recovery, how to support a loved one, and what lessons about ourselves and how our past experiences have shaped us that everyone — regardless of being an addict or not — can learn from addiction.
Dr. Rob is an expert in the treatment of addiction and adult intimacy disorders and the author of "Prodependence: Moving Beyond Codependency," which seeks to move from a word and a culture that casts blame on those who are struggling to help a loved one navigate mental illness or addiction, to a space where they are allowed to be close to that person and encourage their recovery — yet not enable their addiction.
_________________________________
If you've enjoyed listening, please take ONE minute to write a review for our podcast! We would sincerely appreciate it.
We would also love to hear your feedback. There is a survey on our website or you can email hello@bbxx.world. Any questions, concerns, ideas, or suggestions are always more than welcome!
To check out the show notes from our podcast episodes and learn more about BBXX, visit bbxx.world.
In our interview with Dr. Robert Weiss, we learn what it means to be an “addict,” how narcissistic tendencies perpetuate addiction, and what our upbringing has subconsciously taught us about healthy relationships and dependency. We also discuss the importance of a support system in the process of recovery, how to support a loved one, and what lessons about ourselves and how our past experiences have shaped us that everyone — regardless of being an addict or not — can learn from addiction.
Dr. Rob is an expert in the treatment of addiction and adult intimacy disorders and the author of "Prodependence: Moving Beyond Codependency," which seeks to move from a word and a culture that casts blame on those who are struggling to help a loved one navigate mental illness or addiction, to a space where they are allowed to be close to that person and encourage their recovery — yet not enable their addiction.
Sexuality, intimacy, identity, and culture. A podcast about relationships — but really about self-psychology.
We dare you to join us on our journey to better relationships — through deeper knowledge, better understanding, and a rediscovery of yourself!
In our interview with Elizabeth Reed, we discuss the media’s influence — for better or for worse — on LGBTQ identity, culture, and interpretations. We learn how “identities are constituted within, not outside of representation,” we discuss how to combat media invisibility, the ways that the LGBTQ community faces discrimination, and how the media is central in articulating everyone’s identity.
Elizabeth Reed is a cultural sociologist and lecturer at Goldsmiths University in London whose research focuses on LGBTQ relationships and families, contemporary childhood, and the role of media and cultural representations in identity-making.
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To check out show notes from our podcast episodes and learn more about BBXX visit bbxx.world.
If you've enjoyed listening, please take one minute to write a review for our podcast. We would also sincerely appreciate it if you would give us your feedback using the link on our website or by emailing hello@bbxx.world. Any questions, concerns, ideas, or suggestions are always more than welcome!
In our interview with Elizabeth Reed, we discuss the media’s influence — for better or for worse — on LGBTQ identity, culture, and interpretations. We learn how “identities are constituted within, not outside of representation,” we discuss how to combat media invisibility, the ways that the LGBTQ community faces discrimination, and how the media is central in articulating everyone’s identity.
Elizabeth Reed is a cultural sociologist and lecturer at Goldsmiths University in London whose research focuses on LGBTQ relationships and families, contemporary childhood, and the role of media and cultural representations in identity-making.
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To check out show notes from our podcast episodes and learn more about BBXX visit bbxx.world.
If you've enjoyed listening, please take one minute to write a review for our podcast. We would also sincerely appreciate it if you would give us your feedback using the link on our website or by emailing hello@bbxx.world. Any questions, concerns, ideas, or suggestions are always more than welcome!
In our two-episode interview with Dr. Ben Karney, we learn how and why some relationships manage to remain satisfying over time while others tend to deteriorate. We discuss what questions people should be asking themselves before getting married (but usually don’t), how cultural institutions reward married couples, the positive correlation between effective communication and sex, and question how much of marriage success comes down to luck.
Two of our favorite takeaways from this conversation are 1. There is no “right time” to have a difficult conversation. 2. Work is a distraction from relationships, not vice versa.
Dr. Ben Karney has spent the past 15 years studying change and stability in intimate relationships, especially in the early years of marriage. He co-directs the Relationship Institute at UCLA and is a two-time recipient of the National Council on Family Relation’s Reuben Hill Research and Theory Award for outstanding contributions to family science.
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To check out show notes from our podcast episodes and learn more about BBXX visit bbxx.world.
If you've enjoyed listening, please take one minute to write a review for our podcast. We would also sincerely appreciate it if you would give us your feedback using the link on our website or by emailing hello@bbxx.world. Any questions, concerns, ideas, or suggestions are always more than welcome!
In our two-episode interview with Dr. Ben Karney, we learn how and why some relationships manage to remain satisfying over time while others tend to deteriorate. We discuss what questions people should be asking themselves before getting married (but usually don’t), how cultural institutions reward married couples, the positive correlation between effective communication and sex, and question how much of marriage success comes down to luck.
Two of our favorite takeaways from this conversation are 1. There is no “right time” to have a difficult conversation. 2. Work is a distraction from relationships, not vice versa.
Dr. Ben Karney has spent the past 15 years studying change and stability in intimate relationships, especially in the early years of marriage. He co-directs the Relationship Institute at UCLA and is a two-time recipient of the National Council on Family Relation’s Reuben Hill Research and Theory Award for outstanding contributions to family science.
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To check out show notes from our podcast episodes and learn more about BBXX visit bbxx.world.
If you've enjoyed listening, please take one minute to write a review for our podcast. We would also sincerely appreciate it if you would give us your feedback using the link on our website or by emailing hello@bbxx.world. Any questions, concerns, ideas, or suggestions are always more than welcome!
In the second episode of our two-part interview with Dr. Heath Schechinger, we talk about how to craft a relationship that’s right for you, more about jealousy and how it relates to anxiety, and envy, different approaches to talk to your partner about CNM relationships, and we learn more about the American Psychological Association Division 44 Consensual Non-monogamy Task Force. Dr. Heath is a researcher and psychologist at The University of California, Berkeley. Visit BBXX.WORLD for more information, links, or to give us your feedback, etc :)
In the first episode of our two-part interview with Dr. Heath Schechinger, we talk about terminology and learn the nuances between different types of non-traditional relationships. We touch on jealousy and how much there is to be learned — regardless of what type of relationship you’re in — from the important communication required to navigate such a complex emotion. We talk a lot about how much there is to be learned from all of the open communication required for non-traditionally structured relationships, and lastly, we discuss the evolution and the expectations of monogamy.
Dr. Heath is a researcher, psychologist at The University of California Berkeley, and co-chair of the American Psychological Association Division 44 Consensual Non-monogamy Task Force.
Visit BBXX.WORLD for more information, links, or to give us your feedback, etc :)
In the second episode with Dr. Emily Nagoski, she explains the difference between “liking” something and “desiring” it, attachment theory, it, responsive vs spontaneous desire, and how our desire is a system of “accelerators” and “brakes” that, once understood, help us take the driver’s seat of our own desire and pleasure. **Please remember to rate and leave a review for our podcast!
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In the first episode of our two-part interview with Dr. Emily Nagoski, she explains amazing fact that male and female anatomy is actually made of up the exact same parts, she helps us understand that we’re all “normal,” and teaches us how we can learn to listen to (or tune out) our internal voice — with compassion. Dr. Emily Nagoski is the author of the New York Times best-selling book “Come As You Are: The Surprising New Science that Will Transform Your Sex Life.”
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In the second part of our conversation with Caroline Heldman, we talk about the consequences of marketers and the media having the power to shape our culture. We learn that the average teenager is consuming 10.5 hours of media a day and we ask: What happens when the people with the most influence over them are the same ones who profit from their low self-esteem — and care more about their wallet than their wellbeing? We also touch on the mental health crisis of millennials and whether or not social media should be called “anti-social” media.
Caroline Heldman is a professor of politics with a specialty in media, gender, and race — and the president of The Representation Project.
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In the first episode of our two-part conversation with Caroline Heldman, we discuss the role of culture and the media in defining femininity and masculinity, the harm of gender roles, and the way they shape our economy. We also touch on the double-edged sword of social media in creating social movements vs. hindering socialization. Caroline Heldman is a Professor of Politics with a specialty in media, gender, and race — and the president of The Representation Project.
**Please remember to rate and leave a review for our podcast!
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You don't have the exact same sexual preferences for frequency, duration, and time of day as your partner? Welcome to the club! Population: everyone. No one has the same exact libido. Therefore, everyone has mismatched libidos! So, what do you say we start learning from it, instead of just letting it get in the way? In the second episode of our two-part interview with Vanessa Marin, she teaches us how to learn from our libido and how to "turn down our partner without rejecting them." She also talks about how to cultivate more kindness towards our body — even when it feels like it's betraying us.
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The expression "fake it 'til you make it" or "fake it 'til you become it" works for many walks of life — but not in the bedroom and not in relationships. We can't expect ourselves to be able to connect deeply with someone when we're not being our true selves — and more importantly, if we don't feel as though we can be our true selves with someone, then why should we want to be with them? In the first episode of our two-part interview with Vanessa Marin, she shares her personal story about learning why faking orgasms needs to end — and teaches us how being authentic creates more fulfilling and pleasurable experiences in the bedroom.
*Please remember to rate and leave a review for our podcast!
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Fact: Maintaining a fulfilling sex life in a long-term relationship is no simple feat.
Fact: It doesn’t just “happen”. The couples who are happiest with their sex and intimacy are also those that dedicate attention, time, and energy to it. In this episode, Dr. Stephen Snyder shares a few tools that can help you navigate this complicated yet extremely important topic, such as mindfulness techniques to help you reframe — and reclaim — your sexual connection.
Want a list of all the best quotes and amazing resources mentioned in each episode?! Check out our show notes, plus lots more good stuff — www.bbxx.com/lazy
Do you have positive, negative, or neutral associations with casual sex? What role does it play in “hookup culture” and how can we positively influence the expectations — and the outcomes of it? In the second episode of our two-part interview with Dr. Zhana Vrangalova, we debate both sides of hookup culture — both the good and the toxic ways in which it manifests itself — and how we can work to make casual sex more pleasurable and intimate for those who wish to engage in it.
Dr. Zhana Vrangalova is a researcher, sex educator, and adjunct professor at NYU.
What does “casual sex” mean to you? Does it have only one definition or are there different kinds? How does your brain — and your heart — react to it?
In the first episode of our two-part interview with Dr. Zhana Vrangalova, we discuss “casual sex” — the very wide spectrum of how we define it, cultural differences in how we view it, and how self-esteem and dopamine play important roles.
Dr. Zhana Vrangalova is a researcher, sex educator, and adjunct professor at NYU.
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What does “casual sex” mean to you? Does it have only one definition or are there different kinds? How does your brain — and your heart — react to it?
In the first episode of our two-part interview with Dr. Zhana Vrangalova, we discuss “casual sex” — the very wide spectrum of how we define it, cultural differences in how we view it, and how self-esteem and dopamine play important roles. Dr. Zhana Vrangalova is a researcher, sex educator, and adjunct professor at NYU.
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What was your sex education like- in school, from friends? What role did technology play in your education? How do you define consent and how would you explain it to a child? In the second episode of our two-part series, we discuss different ways to understand as well as teach consent, and developmental phases going into adolescent sexuality.
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Did you get "the talk" from your parents when you were young? When and how did you "explore" your own body? Did you use the correct names for intimate body parts? How did your childhood exposure and experiences shape your adulthood beliefs and actions? In episode one of our two-part conversation with Logan, we focus on sexuality through the scope of cultural influences, young children, and how to navigate the complicated landscape when parenting during those early developmental stages.
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“Love and death are the greatest gifts given to us, but mostly they are passed on unopened.” — Rainer Maria Rilke
Dr. Jordana Jacobs argues that if we go on pretending we are going to live forever, we are actually suffocating our capacity to give and experience love. In this episode she talks about how only in accepting our inevitable mortality can we truly transform our relationships and begin to live- and love- to the fullest.
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In this conversation with Roger Kuhn we talk about communication through the lens of sex, intimacy, technology, and culture. Roger Kuhn is a somatic therapist, practicing therapy centered around the relation of the body to the mind. He also focuses greatly on culture and how it shapes, challenges, and ultimately influences our experiences, both inside and outside the bedroom. He is currently completing a PhD in Human Sexuality and runs a private practice in San Francisco, CA.
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"God loves you like a lover, and longs for you like a lover." This is just one of the many surprising examples that Dr. Tina Schermer Sellers found while researching sexuality in religious scriptures.
In this episode, she discusses how the Western church actually used to be sex positive- so where did everything get turned around, and why did religion end up cultivating and capitalizing on sexual fear and shame instead? Dr. Tina Schermer is the author of the book "Sex, God and the Conservative Church," founder of the Northwest Institute of Intimacy, and an advocate for Positive Sexuality.
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Sexual shame is a global issue, but it turns out that in the US it's "even worse that we thought it was." From religion to media, in school and at home, we are bombarded messages about our sexuality that can be subtle yet extremely damaging to ourselves and our relationships. How do we cure sexual shame in order to reclaim not only pleasure but above all else- our mental health and wellbeing? Dr. Tina Schermer is the author of the book "Sex, God and the Conservative Church," founder of the Northwest Institute of Intimacy, and an advocate for Positive Sexuality.
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Masculinity, prostate pleasure, shame, and multiple orgasms. In this episode we talk about the evolution of masculinity over the last few decades- from different cultural stereotypes, to new challenges, and the consequences of "toxic" masculinity. Our guest on the show is Charlie Glickman, the author of The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure, with whom we also discuss the role of shame in men's pleasure and the "Million Dollar Point," a seldom talked about spot that allegedly allows men to have multiple orgasms. Show Notes!
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Tara Galeano is the founder of Boulder Sex Therapy, where she runs workshops for women to reimagine their bodies and rekindle their sexuality- particularly after cancer. Tara tells inspiring stories of the women she works with and talks with us about the ongoing process of discovering your sexuality through your life and throughout body changes- which is something all of us have to deal with eventually in some way, and we probably all need to improve upon. Show Notes!
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“As with every other technology, somehow we find a way to adapt it to use for sex.” In this episode, Ari Tuckman talks about the ways in which technology is changing modern-day relationships, particularly in regards to the ways in which we understand fidelity vs. infidelity. Ari is a renowned psychologist and sex therapist, the author of three books, and has given over 300 talks worldwide. Show Notes!
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“People should use their scale and the ultimate goal would be to have the same type of stimulation with a partner as they have when they are pleasuring themselves.” A brilliant piece of advice from our guest, Laurie Mintz. She is the author of Becoming Cliterate: Why Orgasm Equality Matters and How to Get It, a professor at the University of Florida, and an advocate for female pleasure- helping both men and women learn more about how to better achieve it. Tune in to learn more about how current college students are “the most misinformed generation about sex ever,” how to become more sexually empowered, and how to come out of the “normal” closet.
Show Notes!
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In the second part of our conversation with Peggy Orenstein, we analyze the effects of pop culture, how sexualized it has become, and the ways this affects how young girls are living their first sexual experiences. Peggy talks about how these first sexual experiences tend to be a performance rather than a reflection of feelings- as a result of misleading ideas from the media regarding what empowerment and being a "feminist" actually means. Peggy Orenstein is a New York Times best-selling author of the book Girls & Sex and was voted one of the “40 Women Who Changed the Media Business in the Past 40 Years,” by the Columbia Journalism Review.
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Welcome to the very first episode of the BBXX Podcast, “Let's Get Intimate!” We're here to discuss everything you never learned about sexuality, intimacy, communication, and healthy relationships.
Peggy Orenstein is a New York Times best-selling author of the book Girls & Sex and was voted one of the “40 Women Who Changed the Media Business in the Past 40 Years,” by the Columbia Journalism Review. Our conversation with her was so good that we’ve made two episodes of it!
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Sign up for our digital "book" club — a twice-weekly curation of the best digital content about identity, sexuality, intimacy, and relationships!
A short explanation of why we created this podcast, along with clip highlights from a few of our first episodes.