The Great Transylvanian Bite Off: Recent Episodes
Great Transylvanian Bite Off
On the Great Transylvanian Bite Off, we'll be watching every movie featuring Count Dracula and deciding once and for all: who is the most powerful? Our contestants will be judged on a variety of topics including their planning abilities, their transformation powers, and their fashion prowess.
Welcome to the premiere of the Great Atlantic Chomp-Off! Scoring criteria will be decided and films will be discussed!
We apologize for an upload error that caused this to never actually be posted! But as we prepare to unleash the second season, please enjoy the actual ending to the Great Transylvanian Bite Off.
At last we're here...the end of the road...so of course someone's parent had to be here.
A 2022 release featuring Michael Ironside and lesbians. But boy howdy is it any good? Yeah.
Ok so it's the new Dracula that's based on the book chapter but we really don't want to break strike, so this is our terrible compromise.
A movie that puts the vampire in "experimental vampire film", we really don't get this one ya'll.
Mixing it up this week, we wanted to celebrate the anniversary of a very important vampire movie! Is it any good? Maybe!
A brand new episode (and we apologize for the delay). A famous gunslinger beats Dracula the old fashioned way, by throwing a gun at him.
We're sorry there's no musical this week, but the Dracula sommelier's have picked out a lovely vintage for you to enjoy.
A who's who of horror alum come together to make the most specific movie ever...and we love it!
Finally, we're gonna find out the TRUE story!
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Yeah we know it's a weird one.
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Uh oh this one kind of rules!
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The world's first horror film entirely in American Sign Language sure is a movie!
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Everybody's got the vapors this week, even you listening has given you the vapors! Dracula goes to New Orleans this week and also this has nothing to do with his son? Like at all?
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What kind of special episode? Ohh you've gotta listen to find out!
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A horrifying movie that is bring WAY too much to the table may possibly hold our most exciting Dracula yet...
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Is it possible that this...yes I do believe...good god, it's the worst movie yet!
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El Santo is back and he brought his friend, Rufus!
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A luchador travels back in time to fight Dracula for his treasure! The treasure? Friendship.
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Dracula hits up Istanbul and sure has a time!
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Dracula has a wife in this one and there's nothing racist that happens at all even a little bit NO DON'T LOOK AT THE ENDING!
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Hey wait a minute...this one doesn't even have a Dracula! Or does it...
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Our first foray into Japan gives us a very interesting Dracula with a wonderful 3 bedroom, 3 bath coastal resort house.
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It's a romantic movie....with jokes...and it's...good? This can't be!
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World of Warcraft meets Dracula...what could possibly go wrong?
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We're back at it with the non-Sandler Dracula movies and...wow were they always this bad?
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And just like that...it's over. We hope you've enjoyed the ride.
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We're back, but not at the hotel this time! Also we super needed a pick me up, so we brought our better halves.
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We're checking back into the hotel with our good friend Ben and it's...the same plot as the first one but with the best character in all of fiction added.
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The spooky season has begun and so has the month of Hotel Transylvania. There's too much in here for just us two, so we're joined by special guest Madeleine Norton!
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OH you thought he was GONE? Ridiculous!
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This is a rough one ya'll.
CONTENT WARNINGS: brief discussion of rape, incest, violence.
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Just when you think he's dead, BAM Christopher Lee is back in the game with potentially he's best movie yet...
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Dracula invited a guest over and oh boy is it terrible!
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The greatest monsters of all time are a bunch of losers now, so the Grim Reaper sues them and it's awful.
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We working in the lab, late one night, when Dracula just started dancing? We don't know how or why but it's scary and...good?
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A brief Dracula break to look at Netflix's awesome new vampire film, Day Shift, and maybe some of the best vampire fight scenes ever.
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It's.........time.......for.......the......slowest.....dialogue.......ever.......
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Get ready to break those funny bones, because Mel Brooks came to play this week!
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Recommended listening for this episode includes a shower.
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It's the end of an era as our final Christopher Lee Dracula movie enters the arena!
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Got a great smoothie for you all, don't worry about the flavor, you may slightly taste the blood of Dracula...
Someone didn't chop his head off, so Dracula done gone and risen from the grave! Let's see how good he does when he meets our SPREADSHEET.
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Hey John Carradine's kind of in this one! And Dracula is just Gomez Addams? Honestly, not as bad as it sounds.
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Join us for a pitch black, drunken brawl between these two titans of terror! Also some really harmful stereotypes...
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At long last, it's time! We got the fights, we got the vampires, and we got the tears!
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TOM IS BACK BACK BACK, BACK AGAIN and he's still being an absolute creep.
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TOM TOM TOM TOM TOM!!!!!!
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The premiere Christopher Lee Dracula film is here to scare you with switching character names and vague locations ohhhh spooky!!
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Peter Cushing's last Dracula movie is here, and boy howdy are there a lot of brothers and so many of them have so many weapons!
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We answer some questions from Instagram and do some rough outlining our own Dracula movie!
Dracula Daily: https://draculadaily.substack.com/about
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We got Bond, we got Lee, we got Eastwood, and Dracula's got a zombie army. Who will win? Nobody. Nobody will win.
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A self proclaimed "sexy" Dracula, this one has more than a few surprises in store...it's an insect.
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Take a shot every time we say "Dr. Michael Morbius." We are back and certified Morb-Heads now, so let's figure out how this guy can stand up against our Dracs!
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The first movie that we have literally no idea what they said the entire time, this movie is the ultimate vision of a guy way too into the idea of biting people and the most interesting producer in the world. Part saint, part angel (maybe??), all Dracula.
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Live and in color comes a remake that manages to feel completely different. He's at your window, but boy is he looking emotional doing it. Pull up a seat, pour yourself a nice brandy while we discuss the painting / moody music video known to mortals as: Nosferatu the Vampyre.
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The oldest Dracula film ever joins us this week, let's see how scary it can really b OH MY GOD HE'S IN THE WINDOW WHAT THE HELL??
Interested in learning more about Nosferatu? Here are some helpful links!
https://rosenbach.org/blog/the-destruction-of-nosferatu/
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nosferatu_(word)#:~:text=The%20name%20%22Nosferatu%22%20has%20been,the%20film%20Nosferatu%20(1922).
https://operawire.com/opera-meets-film-the-strange-history-of-operatic-passages-in-erdmanns-score-for-murnaus-iconic-nosferatu/
https://themoviescores.com/inicio/bandas-sonoras-del-cine-mudo/nosferatu-eine-symphonie-des-grauens-1922-hans-erdmann-la-sinfonia-del-horror/
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Dracula got in a little scuffle with the neighborhood kids, so don't mind the scars.
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Who told you about this? Was it Dracula??
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In space...no one can hear how racist you are...
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We finish out season 1 of Netflix's Castlevania and touch up some old scores!
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We finish our discussion on the BBC and Netflix three part series "Dracula" and RANK him, with still fantastic guests Ben Folts and SMJ.
CONTENT WARNING: Still a few descriptions of violence.
For more from SMJ check out: https://www.smjwrites.com/
For more from Ben Folts check out: https://www.benfolts.com/about
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Our first part of the BBC and Netflix three part series "Dracula" with fantastic guests Ben Folts and SMJ.
CONTENT WARNING: Graphic descriptions of violence.
For more from SMJ check out: https://www.smjwrites.com/
For more from Ben Folts check out: https://www.benfolts.com/about
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Our first TV show, and boy howdy it's a good one!
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We finish our non-sequential trilogy with the worst one yet!
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The trilogy begins! Gerry Butler gives us a sexy and smooth Dracula for the 21st century. Part Matrix, part Scream, ALL brought to you by Virgin Records.
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Rutger Hauer brings it in this finale to a trilogy we haven't watched yet. Will his Danish bonus be enough to put him over the top?
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We've got the wonderful and powerful Nikki and Kate from the podcast "Just Ghoul With It" on this week to talk about Scooby-Doo and his best bud Shaggy! Shaggy drives a race car, is turned into a werewolf, and is forced to race in a grand prix by Dracula.
Check out Just Ghoul With It: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/just-ghoul-with-it/id1560020415
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He's got it all folks, the jacket, the hair, and Ryan Reynold's pecks. Is our Dracula this week gonna be able to stand up to Blade? Maybe??!!
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When the Prince of Darkness is replaced by the Grim Reaper, Dracula decides to try and regain his title by...throwing a killer Christmas party? Well, if it works for you Dracula!
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He's got a mustache and smoke and man oh man he's not that funny. But will his middling scores allow him to pull ahead in the running?
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Oh boy. Just buckle up.
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A cult classic with a whole lotta dynamite! This week Dracula attempts to snatch a magical amulet in order to turn the whole world to darkness and evil. He didn't plan on pre-teens getting in his way though!
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He's back, and this time he's got a weaponized virus! Can two interchangeable MI-5 agents and Peter Cushing take down a resurrected Dracula before he can unless evil on the world? Maybe if they're not too busy dealing with these ding dang snipers.
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The world's greatest detective vs the Prince of Darkness. It's a battle for the ages as these two titans throw down on the streets of Gotham. Who will win? Who will claim bat logo supremacy??
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Dracula's back and he's got a French kid! And he's French? And there's a leather coffin...this is a lot actually...
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ONE WILL ENTER. ONE WILL GET CLOSE TO A PERFECT SCORE. WHO WILL WIN??? What happens if we put two non-Dracula characters up to our rigorous Dracula standards? Find out here!
The title's misleading but the numbers never lie! Will this Dracula be able to shine, or will he be stomped as he tries to sneak under a door as a tiny bat? Find out at the Great Transylvanian Bite Off!
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Well ya'll, we had to call in an expert to clarify some Dracula book stuff for us, so we brought in Dacre Stoker to help us out!
Dacre Stoker is the great grand-nephew of Bram Stoker and the international best-selling co-author of Dracula the Un-Dead (Dutton, 2009), the official Stoker family endorsed sequel to Dracula. Dacre is also the co-editor (with Elizabeth Miller) of The Lost Journal of Bram Stoker: The Dublin Years (Robson Press, 2012). Dacre has consulted and appeared in recent film documentaries about vampires in literature and popular culture. The Real Vampire Files (2010 History Channel), The Tillinghast Nightmare, (2014 Historical Haunts), Secrets of the Dead (2015 PBS), Mysteries at the Museum, (2017 Travel Channel) Legend Hunter (2019 Travel Channel) He currently hosts tours to Ireland to visit places in Dublin where Bram Stoker lived, was educated, worked, and researched.
For more information on Dacre, check out: http://dacrestoker.com/
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He's got a house now ya'll. Dracula wants to get cured, so does the Wolfman. What will happen? Who will win? Will it end suddenly? Yes. Also we revisit some scores from the past and make some updates.
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This one nasty ya'll. Dracula gets down and dirty, but he's kind of an idiot so that probably won't help anything. But he can lift a dude straight in the air, so that's gotta be worth something. Right?
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Chip chip cheerio, it's off to jolly old England for a very BBC production of Dracula. What's he doing in this one? Who knows? He sure doesn't!
Dracula travels to India and throws down with Kali. We got dance numbers and demons, and a final score that will shock you...
What on earth will these wacky boys get up to in this episode? With Frankenstein's Monster and Dracula arriving in maybe Florida, Abbott and Costello will have their hands full! But with Bela Lugosi's return, will he be able to score higher than he did before? Or will he fall into the dirty swamp water?
It's the big one. Angels, demons, and a rad crossbow lead to what could be our most powerful Dracula yet...
Dracula is in LA in this one! They changed some names for some reason, but it's ya boy Drac, for better or worse...
Our first animated Dracula has a rocky start, but can he gain points back in the showstopper? We'll see...
Our very first Dracula enters the ring! He'll get big points for hypnotism, but will the fact he basically tells everyone he's a vampire lose him points in the long run? Yes, yes it will.