The Blessed Soul: Recent Episodes
Michael Grove
Why do we struggle with emotions and feelings?
There is a deep rooted piece of who we are that seems to be socially unacceptable to talk about.
Yet if we are to be wholistic followers of Christ, how are we to honestly love God if we haven’t learned to express the hurts and pains deep within us. It’s through the raw emotion and feeling that we authentically learn to love God with our Heart, Soul, Mind, and Strength. So while it’s popular social etiquette to mask our feelings and cover up our emotions, The Blessed Soul strives to address these hidden thoughts and feelings.
Through the Blessed Soul, we will face unspoken emotions head on. Not only will we create a space that approves conversations about these things as acceptable, but also take the moment to be real about hurts and pains. Inside of this authenticity, we will read scripture that echos our sentiment. And once we have fully understood and addressed these moments, we will speak blessing over the pieces of us that are often hidden and unpopular to talk about.
The Blessed Soul is a daily podcast airing Monday through Friday each week. These episode range from 5-10 minutes.
These Podcast are a product of calibratedvalues.com.
February 4
Ezekiel 13-15
So today’s reading is why we are doing this.
If you remember Ezekiel’s vision the past few days in our reading, there was a hole in the wall of the temple. This was to demonstrate how the foundations of their relationship with God were broken and in shambles.
But now, that wall has been covered with whitewash.
What is that? It’s actually untempered mortar. This is mortar that is weak and used as a skim coat over the wall. It is not meant to be strong or to carry any weight. It is simple and made to cover over the hole so that it looks better.
The Lord is comparing this with the foundations of the false prophets. They are saying things that are tickling the ears and causing people to feel good about what is being said. But it is not grounded in deep truth. So God is against these prophets because they are causing people to fall away from him.
Sound familiar?
We live in a world of Christian confusion. Why?
Because people love whitewashed walls. They love the pretty stuff that is easy to hear and sounds good. But the deep truths of the scriptures that are hard to handle.. . . leave those for someone else.
If we are going to be in the presence of the Lord, we must be people committed to the solid truth of the scriptures. It’s through the scripture that God reveals himself. It is through his word, that we are able to know who he is and what he asks of us. Without knowing his word, we will always be led away from him - tricked by every fancy teaching that makes us feel good.
So, may you know God’s truth! May you ignore preaching made to leave you feeling good. May you grab ahold of the deep truths of the scripture. And may it lead you into the presence of the Sovereign Lord today!
Have you ever felt like no one understand what you are walking through?
Have you thought to yourself, No one sees me! I’m all alone!
There is an amazing story in the Book of Genesis about a man named Abram, his wife Sarai, and the people who make up their story. But there is one person who gets mistreated that we rarely talk about. Her name was Hagar.
She faithfully served Abram and Sarai. And one day, she became the surrogate mother to the promised family line of Abram. But Sarai despised her for this. So she mistreated and abused Hagar.
Unable to take any more, Hagar took off and ran into the desert.
But an angel of the Lord met her there.
Listen to Genesis 16:8- Hagar, slave of Sarai, where have you come from, and where are you going?”
“I’m running away from my mistress Sarai,” She answered.
Then the angel of the Lord delivers her a message about how she will be blessed and how she will have a child who will be blessed. But she has to go back.
The promise seems so good that Hagar says this in vs 13, “you are the God who sees me,” For she said, “I have now seen the One who sees me.”
The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears them;
He delivers them from all their troubles.
The Lord is close to the brokenhearted
And saves those who are crushed in spirit.
So which one is it?
Does the Lord deliver those who are righteous and cry out to him, or are they brokenhearted? Because either he hears them, and saves them, or they are crushed in spirit. But brokenhearted and crushed in spirit, don’t equate to being saved. . . do they? What is Psalm 34:17-18 mean here?
I don’t know if you have ever been crushed in spirit before, or if you have suffered the agony of a broken heart. Neither of them feel good.
And we often get news or walk through something that devastates us.
IN these moments, it’s so hard to even cry out to the Lord.
Have you ever felt let down by God before?
The hardest thing with feeling this way, is that when we are let down by him, we certainly aren’t going to cry out to him.
I think that’s what the enemy would love for you.
When you are let down, or hurt - to feel like you can’t even cry out to God.
But the Psalmist is giving us the formula.
When we are in trouble, when we are broken hearted, or when crushed in spirit, it’s the righteous that still cry out any way. Listen to what verse 19 says, The righteous person may have many troubles, but the Lord delivers him form them all;
He doesn’t take them away. He doesn’t necessarily reverse time and take back the diagnosis, or reverse the outcome, revive the relationship or restore the position. But he does rescue and deliver you!
What does that mean?
Why, my soul, are you downcast?
Why so disturbed within me?
The writer of the 42nd psalm struggles with a battle that is common, yet rarely talked about.
The feeling of being in deep, dark, anguish and depression.
This pain has brought the writer to a question - Where can I go and meet with God?
The hardest part of dealing with the pains we feel, is the alienation it causes us to have towards God. Written in a time when worship and closeness with God was understood through temple worship, the writer longs for the ability to get back to the house of the Lord.
They say in vs 2-4
I thirst for God, the living God. When can I go and stand before him? Day and night I have only tears for food, while my enemies continually taunt me, saying, “Where is this God of yours?” My heart is breaking as I remember how It used to be: I walked among the crowds of worshipers, leading a great procession to the house of God, singing for joy and giving thanks amid the sounds of a great celebration!
Something has cut the writer off from being in the house of the Lord.
And because of this, their grief has left them feeling alone, hurt, and desperate. They have no place to turn, and no way to worship the Lord.
But something beautiful happens in this Psalm.
In desperation the writer reflects from where they are, at the beauty of God. And this beauty isn’t found in the temple. It isn’t mixed in the ceremonial sounds of a great celebration. It’s not encamped in the middle of the great crowds of worshipers. It’s seen over a hundred miles away from the temple. It’s founding the world around them.
I’m thirsty
When Jesus said this from the cross, it was more than him needing a refreshing beverage as he hung there. This was the deep broken soul of the messiah, relating to the empty, hollow feeling of nothingness we often feel inside.
Just moments before this, he took on the weight and punishment of mankind’s sin. And in that moment, he felt the abandonment of His Heavenly Father. Now, Jesus hung on the cross, broken, ashamed, and alone.
So John tells us in verse 28 of chapter 19,
Later, knowing that everything had now been finished, and so that Scripture would be fulfilled, Jesus said, “I am thirsty.”
He wasn’t just responding to his physical awareness when he said this. He was thinking of the full pictures. The scriptures being fulfilled, and the soon coming conclusion of his earthly life was at hand, he thirsted for completion. He was ready for the curse of sin to be broken, and to be reunited with His Heavenly Father once again!
I wonder, did Jesus flash back through his earthly life?
Did he see those moments where the angels proclaimed his birth?
Did he know of the shepherds who came and visited him as a newborn baby?
Did he understand what was happening, as he stood in the temple answering questions of the religious leaders?
Did his mind stop at his baptism, and did he look at his temptations in the wilderness and say, “This is what it was all leading to?”
Did he travel in his mind, straight through the moment in the garden, and right up onto the cross?
Did he see that everything spoken in scripture up to this moment, and what it would mean, was all coming to a crescendo?
Because as he breathed his last moments, he was able to say, “Father, into your hands I commend my spirit. And then with one last exhale, “it is finished.”
My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?
Less than 24 hours before this, Jesus had found himself on the ground in the garden of Gethsemane. Hunched over in sheer anguish, he cried out with blood like sweat, dripping from his forehead. In a plea deep from his heart, He reasons with God almighty. “Lord, if there is any other way, let this cup pass from me. But not my will, but yours be done!”
God could have done anything he wanted to destroy the effects of sin. But he chose to let Jesus walk this path, in order for you and I to know how incredibly much he loves us.
But what was it that Jesus dreaded about this process?
It wasn’t the physical pain that he would endure, though this would be torturous.
It wasn’t the ridicule he would withstand, though this would be crushing.
It wasn’t even the humiliation that would be cast upon him, though this would be overwhelming.
So what was Jesus dreading?
He knew, that in order to take on the sins of the world, he would have to experience the wages of sin. Death. Not physical, bodily death. Though that was coming too. But spiritual, separation from the Father type death.
You see, in order for Jesus to pay the punishment for sin, He had to take on all sin. And once he had sin on his shoulders, He would be separated from the heavenly father. Not because God didn’t love him, or because he didn’t want to be near him. But because a Holy God is by nature separate from Sin. So in order for Jesus to pay the punishment of sin, he took on the weight of sin, and in so doing was separated from the Holiness of God.
And for the first time in all of eternity, Jesus was alone. He felt the cold abandonment of God, caused by sin.
There is a command that Jesus gave us, that we have come to know as the Great Commission. It is found in Matthew 28:19-20 and it says this,
Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you.
It’s a command that Jesus gave his followers, that shows the process of including others into this faith journey.
For years, churches have held on tightly to this commission and based their purpose and mission off of it. It holds a vital equation to what many churches call discipleship.
Discipleship is the process of learning to follow Jesus.
But what if we have gotten it wrong as the church. What if we have been looking at the Great Commission, and reversing the order.
There are three main parts to the equation.
Go and make disciples, Baptize them, And then teach them to obey everything I have commanded you.
Disciples, baptism, obedience. ..
When Jesus set it up, he made it simple, and was something that everyone could do from any walk of life.
But he didn’t just set it up here in the great commission. He modeled it leading up to this.
“Near the cross of Jesus, stood his mother, his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clops, and Mary Magdalene. When Jesus saw his mother there, and the disciple whom he loved standing nearby, he said to her, “Woman, here is your son,” and to the disciple, “here is your mother.” From that time on, this disciple took her into his home.
John 19:25-27
What a journey for Mary!
Can you imagine standing by as the mother of the Messiah?
When Mary had first given birth to Jesus, a group of shepherds came and visited them. They explained how angels appeared to them and told them of Jesus’ birth while proclaiming the glory of God. It was an unbelievable and supernatural event! Everyone listening to the shepherds were amazed at what they said. Yet, Luke 2:19 tells us, that Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart.
What was it that she pondered?
Was it that God had given her this responsibility?
Was it that the shepherds, the lowest of the lowest, were the ones to first hear this great news that was going to be for all people?
Or was it that she looked at her son, and was overwhelmed with great pride at what he would become?
Fast forward about 12 years, and Mary and Joseph lose Jesus in the chaos of the Passover festivities. After finding him in the temple three days later, he is amazing the people there with how wise and educated he was. And after Mary and Joseph argue with him about the anxiety Jesus caused them, and how they were confused at what he was saying and doing, Luke reminds us once again in 2:51, It once again says that Mary treasured all these thing in her heart.
Luke paints a picture of a mother who was not only proud of her son, but who knew that she held a special place in his heart. But how would she know that?
“Father forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing”
This is one of 7 things that we record of Jesus saying from the cross.
But who was he talking about?
To understand this, you have to go back into the garden of Eden.
Darkness, was over the surface of the deep. Not just any darkness, anxious, chaos forming nothingness type darkness. This darkness constantly pulled and engulfed anything that tried to survive. It was the goal of the darkness to consume, and to destroy anything of value. Yet, God the creator, breathed his Spirit gently - yet assertively - directly into the middle of this darkness. And through it, he began to speak life and beauty, purpose, and completion, right where this darkness tired to encamp. After a series of commands and breaths, the entire cosmos swirled majestic beauty and awe.
Yet what did the darkness do?
It continued to try and consume. While the whole of creation was very good and complete, the pieces of it were instantly gnawed at by the darkness around it.
Imagine being in the garden with Jesus as he prayed.
He was now just moments away from being arrested, and he knew the time was coming near. He was so filled with anguish that he looked a few of his disciples and said, “My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me.”
It was an intense moment!
We read that Jesus had sweat like drops of blood falling to the ground.
And in this tension, we hear an honest prayer from Jesus.
Matthew 26:39
Father, if there is any other way, will you take this cup from me. But not my will, but yours be done.”
What was Jesus saying?
Father, if there is any others way - In other words, Jesus knew that the infinite Heavenly Father, could do anything he wanted to remedy the problem of sin. He really could have called 10 thousand angels. But the problem with the Hymn, is that he didn’t need them to destroy the world. He could have had them fight the spiritual battle and destroy evil. He could have found another way to make things right, without Jesus suffering, being humiliated, beaten, ridiculed, and murdered on a cross. But he didn’t.
Why was God’s will for Jesus to die?
About midnight, I will go throughout Egypt. Every firstborn son in Egypt will die, from the firstborn son of Pharaoh, who sits on the throne, to the firstborn son of the female slave, who is at her hand mill, and all the firstborn of the cattle as well. There will be loud wailing throughout Egypt-worse than there has ever been or ever will be again. But among the Israelites not a dog will bark at any person or animal. Then you will know that the Lord makes a distinction between Egypt and Israel.
These are the words Moses spoke to Pharaoh before the death angel visited Egypt. It was the final plague and the final demonstration of Power, that God used to demonstrate the length he was willing to go to bring freedom and life to his people.
At midnight, the Death Angel struck down all the firstborn in Egypt. All of Egypt was awakened at midnight by the sound of loud wailing throughout the land. And then God instructs them in Exodus 12:14, This is the day you are to commemorate; for the generations to come you shall celebrate it as a festival to the Lord - a lasting ordinance.
What a gruesome day to commemorate. A day full of death and destructions.
Yet for the Israelites, it was a day of life and freedom.
For them, it wasn’t a night of death. They had been told to slaughter a lamb, and then place the blood of the lamb on the doorpost. For every home with this blood on their door, the death angel past over them.
So for hundreds of years, the Jewish people remembered the Passover. The night the death angel past over them, and allowed them to find freedom!
So on this day of the passion week, Jesus too finds himself at the Passover meal.
As the perfume jar was broken open, and the fragrance filled the air, Mary anointed Jesus feet, and honored him in front of everyone. Yet while this happened, we read the one of the disciples stood there in disgust.
John 12:4 - 6
Judas Iscariot, who was later to betray him, objected, “why wasn’t this perfume sold and the money given to the poor? It was worth a year’s wages.” He did not say this because he cared about the poor but because he was a thief; as keeper of the money bag, he used to help himself to what was put into it.
Judas had a greedy heart.
He loved money and the ease at which he could access the money bag. So when he saw Mary bring this gift of honor to Jesus, we see into the greed that has overtaken his heart. He wanted more money, and the access to it.
The hard thing with greed, is that you don’t even see it coming. You start wanting more. Then you start making decisions based on our desire. Next thing you know, you are selfishly making moves that hurt the people around you without even thinking about it.
Listen to 1 Timothy 6:9
But people who long to be rich fall into temptation and are trapped by many foolish and harmful desires that plunge them into ruin and destruction.
Judas, found himself the subject of what Timothy is writing here. While Judas made his own decision and did things he would later regret, he was trapped. He kept seeing money and the way it was bingo used, and all he could think was the gains he could have had.
Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will never pass away.
Jesus said this toward the end of the second day of the passion week.
But what does it mean?
All day, Jesus spent time teaching his disciples. He talked bout taxes and Caesar, making sure to separate what is earthly and what is heavenly. He says the classic line to give unto Caesar what is Caesars, and unto God what is Gods.
He talked about a tenants, who coveted a vineyard and all the wealth it was able to generate. In this story, the tenants mistreat, abuse, and even murder the owners men in order to try and keep it for themselves. This story revealed the greed of mankind. It ultimately illustrated a greed so deep that would cause the messiah to be put to death.
He taught about the greatest commandments, and how they put God first, and ultimately love others as one might love themselves.
He even took a moment to warn against teachers of the law, who walk around looking for notoriety, and honor. They make a name for themselves at the cost of others.
While standing in the temple, they witness a poor woman bring her best offering and place it in the collection. Jesus points out how material possession and money, are nothing compared to heart.
And as the day was coming to and end, the disciples and Jesus were leaving the temple. One of his disciples said to him, “look, Teacher! What massive stones! What magnificent buildings!” This disciple was marveling at the material world and what it offered.
All day long, this was the line Jesus walked the edge of in his teachings. Money and taxes, what belongs to God verse what belongs to man. The vineyard was a conversation about greed, and coveting wealth over human life. Even the teachers of the law and how they treated people - was Jesus’ analysis of what pride and selfishness do when they trump the spiritual well bing of others.
As we enter into what’s known as the passion week, we will take a look at Jesus’ life, and how he spent the final week before going to the cross. This week is known as the passion week, because it refers to the events that lead to Jesus’ suffering, and why he was willing to do it. As we enter into this week, I hope to take you on a journey of seeing things through the eyes of Jesus. Remember that during this week particularly, Jesus was focused on the calling in front of him, to save mankind - and bring us back into right relationship with the Heavenly Father. I pray that through this week, you will find a new appreciation for what Jesus saw, and exactly how he thought of you!
Episode 6
Mark 11:12-14
The next day as they were leaving Bethany, Jesus was hungry. Seeing in the distance a fig tree in leaf, he went to find out if it had any fruit. When he reached it, he found nothing but leaves, because it was not the season for figs. Then he said to the tree, “May no one ever eat fruit from you again.” And his disciples heard him say it.
Wow!
That seems a bit cold, doesn’t it. Just because there wasn’t any fruit on the tree, Jesus curses it and it never producers fruit again? Why did Jesus respond this way to a tree. Especially since Mark here notes that it was not even the season for figs.
If it was out of season, why would Jesus expect there to be fruit.
Fig trees are popular in this area. They are very full and obvious. Jesus here notices it from off the road. So he went over to it. But when he got there, he didn’t see anything but leaves.
Fig trees are particular. They have season for fruit to grow. At the time of this event, this is not the season yet. It will happen a few months later in the year. What was Jesus expecting to see? If season wasn’t in place, why wouldn’t he understand that there would’t have been any fruits.
The dead man came out, his hands and feet wrapped with strips of linen, and a cloth around his face.
Like a scene from an old zombie movie, Lazarus didn’t just come out of the tomb. He was bound and wrapped. Cloth tied his hands together and kept his legs wrapped from moving. He had no freedom from the grave, it held him captive. And the grave clothes were tied as a symbol of his prison. Yet Jesus called to him, and he found his way out.
But the way John begins this story, reveals the one who truly found freedom in this moment.
John 11:1-2 says this,
Now a man named Lazarus was sick. He was from Bethany, the village of Mary and her sister Martha. (This Mary, whose brother Lazarus now lay sick, was the same one who poured perfume on the Lord and wiped his feet with her hair.)
Interesting. If you know the order of events here, at the time of Lazarus’s death, Mary hadn’t done this yet. So why does John place this detail out of order here?
Perhaps the answer to that is in their interaction with Jesus when he arrived on the scene in Bethany.
Both Martha and Mary have a similar statement to Jesus when they see him,
“Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.” They have both resigned themselves to the fact that Jesus could have, yet he didn’t. He could have saved Lazarus from death, but he failed to come to them. He left them alone to figure it out without him.
For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.
Romans 8:24-25
Hope.
That’s kind of a scary word isn’t it?
I think sometimes we think that in order to have hope, we have to have it all together somehow. But the truth is, hope is believing in something we do not see. When we don’t see something, the hope is that we will see an answer that doesn’t make sense. Inside of that, God doesn’t expect that we have it all figured out. We just simply wait for it with patience.
Also a confusing word.
Patience doesn’t mean we don’t have questions. It simply means we can accept and tolerate what is happening.
Martha met Jesus as he came into Bethany. Lazarus had been daed four days at this point, and she was working through her feelings. Listen to what she says to Jesus in John 11:21-22, “Lord,” Martha said to Jesus, “if you had been here, my brother would not have died. But I know that even now God will give you whatever you ask.”
Do you hear the conflict from within her?
She is let down.
She is confused and hurt.
Yet she has hope - even though she can’t see any sort of answer.
Jesus tells her, “Your brother will rise again.”
Martha answered, I know he will rise again in the resurrection at the last day.” Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die; and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?”
Jesus is separating what she believes, from what she is working through. And she answers with complete certainty. “Yes, Lord. I believe that you re the Messiah, the Son of God, who is to come into the world.”
Why didn’t he go right then and there?
That’s all I could think after reading John 11:6 which says, “So when he heard that Lazarus was sick, he stayed where he was two more days, and then he said to his disciples, “let us go back to Judea.”
Let me get this straight John, you are telling me that Jesus loved Lazarus so much, that when he heard he was sick, it impacted him so much that he stayed where he was for two more days. That doesn’t make any sense!
Have you ever felt like you were looking for answers from Jesus and instead you got the opposite of an answer. You were hoping he would resolve something but instead you just had more questions. This is one of those moments! If Jesus was so concerned, if he really loved Lazarus so much, why wait? Why not hurry off to him?
What we read next might seem calloused of Jesus.
Listen to verses 11-14
After he had said this, he went on to tell them, “Our friend Lazarus has fallen asleep; but I am going there to wake him up.”
His disciples replied, “Lord, if he sleeps, he will get better.” Jesus had been speaking of his death, but his disciples thought he meant natural sleep.
So then he told them plainly, “Lazarus is dead, and for your sake I am glad I was not there, so that you may believe. But let us go to him.”
This week we are talking lessons from the life of Lazarus. As we discussed in yesterday’s podcast, Jesus’ response to this situation should be looked at through the lens that he is mentally, spiritually, and emotionally preparing for the mission he is soon to accomplish. His focus is more towards mankind, than a single person in this stage of his ministry. So we continue reading John 11:5-9
Now Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus. So when he heard that Lazarus was sick, he stayed where he was two more day, and then said to his disciples, “let us go back to Judea.”
“But Rabbi”, they said, “a short while ago the Jews there tired to stone you, and yet you are going back?”
Jesus answered, “Are there not twelve hours of daylight? Anyone who walks in the daytime will not stumble, for they see by this world’s light. It is when a person walks at night that they stumble, for they have no light.”
What is Jesus saying?
I can imagine that the disciples heard these words of Jesus and had no idea what it all meant. While you and I sit on the other side of this story, they were watching it all unfold, completely unaware of what the next few weeks was about to hold for them.
I think in this moment, the disciples were looking for reassurance and certainty. So much had happened, that they were confused, a little worn out, and ready for resolution to the conflicts around them. Jesus had been targeted by religious officials. The political leaders had an eye on them. There was pressure all around them.
Have you ever felt that before?
Sometimes in life we can feel pressure bearing down on us from every side. Jesus and his disciples knew what this was like. I’m sure at this point in their time together, the disciples listened intently to Jesus, and at the same time, kept one eye open. Always aware of who was around them, and what the temperature of the crowd was. It was exhausting.
I’ve been there. You know, one of those times when you are done! Tired of watching and waiting. Tired of always looking for an answer - only to keep looking.
So when Jesus responds by talking about 12 hours of daylight, and walking and stumbling in darkness, I can feel the exasperation of the moment. It’s the kind of moment that one might be tempted to say, “Really! Can’t you just answer simply. Tell us what is going to happen and what we should do.”
I’ve been in that spot so many times! I’m waiting for an answer. I’ve tried to faithfully follow and do what I know is right. Yet I’m worn out. I don’t see any resolution. Really, Jesus was giving a big picture answer to a specific momentary problem.
So when we get to Thomas’ response, I resonate with him! Listen to what he says in vs. 16 - “Then Thomas said to the rest of the disciples, “Let us also go, that we may die with him.”
I see him wide eyed, holding his breath as Jesus talks, shoulders slightly raised, as he leans in expecting answers. But then turning to his peers with a sense of sarcasm and frustration - Hey, let us go with him, that we may all die. . . .
Lord, the one you love is sick.
Imagine these words, as they hit Jesus’ ears in that moment.
To you and me, we hear those words and think of the honor Lazarus sat in. What a special family we are dealing with. It’s clear that in John’s assessment, Mary, Martha, and Lazarus hold a special place with Jesus. And this must have been an obvious fondness, because the very John who wrote this gospel, often referred to himself as the disciple whom Jesus loved. This means that at the time when John wrote these words, he also understood the symbolism behind what was taking place.
Because while you and I hear the report - that the one Jesus loved, was sick. Jesus, being fully God - had a piece inside of him that said - I know. . . That’s why I’m here.
John 11:1-3 tell the story like this.
Now a man named Lazarus was sick. He was from Bethany, the village of Mary and her sister Martha. (This Mary, whose brother Lazarus now lay sick, was the same one who poured perfume on the Lord and wiped his feet with her hair.) So the sisters sent word to Jesus, “Lord, the one you love is sick.”
While John paints a great picture of the special relationship Jesus had with them, he has to put his earthly feelings on hold, as he answers a higher purpose. Sure Jesus loved Lazarus. He has a special place for Mary and Martha, but when he hears these words, he is reminded of his mission.
What mission is that?
To save the world.
As we walked up the trial, we could see the end towering above us about a mile above the rocky terrain. But the problem is, we could see it the entire time. The straight uphill, rocky trail, combined with the hot beating sun, seemed to make every step feel twice as heavy and labored as it should have been. And as we weaved back and forth, through the winding trail, the end seemed to remain stationary, marked where we could see it, yet always out of reach.
And the more we focused on the ending of the trail. The further away it seems to be.
It was like, we were working hard to get somewhere, yet never getting there. We were clawing and climbing, with no sense of accomplishment.
My youngest looked to the top, and gave up. He could take no more.
And in a moment of shear exhaustion and frustration, he became too weak to carry on.
Then came the question I dreaded, and yet expected. . .
Dad, will you carry me on your back. . . .
There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.
1 John 4:18
Have you ever been afraid to let someone down?
That’s a natural feeling we all have when we love someone.
But have you ever been scared to let someone down?
I’ve talked with people who grew up on edge, always scared that they would disappoint, or upset a loved one. This fear drove them to walk on eggshells. They were always tip toeing around subjects and trying to avoid raw feeling. And as time went on, they learned to internalize, suppress, and even ignore how they felt. This drove them to a point of suppressed emotion. And left them unable to deal with their own feelings.
Somewhere in this scenario, love was absent.
We just read what John said.
There is no fear in love. But perfect love, casts out fear.
How?
Perfect love has room for conflict,
Perfect love has room for expression
Perfect love has room for apology, and reconciliation, and raw conversation.
A relationship that doesn’t have room for disagreement, isn’t a relationship built in love. When we love someone, we should be able to go to them and express how we feel, without being made to feel stupid, or worthless, or like we are a disappointment.
I’m a Mess!!!!!
I get so easily frustrated,
I lose my temper,
I can be really selfish,
The smallest things seem to annoy me
Patience was never one of my strengths
I have low self esteem
I can’t focus long enough to always see things to completion.
I can be mean
I never stop to admit when I’m wrong
I don’t put others first
The list goes on and on!
Have you ever felt like, it’s just not fixable? If I were to change everything about me that was messed up or wrong, where would it stop?
There is an interesting conversation with Jesus and Peter in John 13. In this moment, Jesus is talking to his disciples and he washes their feet. This was something that was done as a very humble act. If people of prestige or honor came to your house, you would wash their feet. And you certainly wouldn’t let them wash yours. So when Jesus gets to Peter, he refuses to let Jesus wash his feet.
Jesus says, “Unless I wash you, you have no part with me.
Then, Lord, Simon Peter replied, “not just my feet but my hands and my head as well!”
Nazareth, can anything good come from there?
What a hurtful question! Not just the question, but the discriminatory bigotry behind how he said it.
Philip came to Nathanael and said, “We have found the one Moses wrote about in the Law, and about whom the prophets also wrote - Jesus of Nazareth, the son of Joseph.
And this was his response. He basically said that Nazareth was worthless, and anyone who came from it had no value too.
Now if someone had come to me and said this about me, my family, or even my home town, I would have written them off. No need to talk to me, if this is how you feel, go back to your little self-centered world. I’ll be fine on my own.
So Philip tells Nathanael, “come and see.”
Somehow, that was enough for Nathanael to follow Philip to meet Jesus.
Before they could even get all the way over to Jesus, He calls out to Nathanael - “now Here truly is an Israelite in whom there is no deceit.”
Nathanael was shocked. “How do you know me?” He asks.
Jesus responded, “I saw you while you were still under the fig tree, before Philip called you.”
Nathanael declared, “Rabbi, you are the son of God; you are the king of Israel.”
It’s interesting. When someone offends me, I write them off. I dont’ want to hear from them, talk to them, or even look at them.
There is something deep inside of me that is so self protective, that I instantly want to fight someone who says something hurtful towards me. Yet Jesus takes away Nathanael’s discriminatory remarks, and gives him a place as his friend. Is it possible that I’ve allowed my offense by someone else’s ignorant remarks, to cause me to shut someone off, and ultimately miss the chance to have a close relationship with them?
I’m so unimpressed with impressive people.
You know the ones who have it all together, and who have a list of talents a mile long.
Or how unfair are gorgeous people? The ones that wake up looking better than I do after a couple hours trying to get myself ready.
I watch talented people, and secretly hope they fail.
I listen to great speakers, and critique their every word.
I’ve sat next to super wise, knowledge filled geniuses, and despised every word they said.
Why?
Some would say jealousy.
While that has a piece in materializing what is happening below the surface, it’s not the culprit.
So what is?
It’s a fear of being. . . . unimpressive in the shadow of the impressive. Because if I’m not impressive, then what do I amount to? And if I don’t amount to anything, no one would notice me. And unfortunately, if no one notices me, I tend to believe God doesn’t see me either.
Has it ever felt like God has put you on hold?
Like you were waiting for an answer, and instead of God working on your behalf, everyone else was getting answers, while you sat there waiting?
This happened to a man named Jairus.
He was so scared.
His only daughter was at home, dying.
So he frantically looked for Jesus, believing he could come and save her.
Jairus raced around, his heart beating out of his chest, as he desperately looked for Jesus. He believed Jesus could heal her, and when he saw him, he threw himself down at Jesus’ feet, and pleaded with him to come to his house.
I can imagine there was a sense of relief as Jesus agreed to follow him.
I think we have all been in one of these moments before. When we desperately need God to answer our prayers. You know that moment, when you would do anything, just for God to move on your behalf. Sometimes it feels like we are forgotten, and left to struggle. And then in a moment, Jairus saw a glimmer of hope!
Jairus must have been so excited when Jesus said he would go to his house. I imagine he jumped to his feet, and felt a deep sense of urgency, as the cure for his daughter was coming to his house.
As he pressed through the people, and tried to pull Jesus along, he probably lost all patience. After all, he was ready to get Jesus there, and see his daughter healed.
But then, Jesus stopped in his tracks.
Who touched me?
Even the disciples couldn’t believe what was happening. There were people everywhere, and they were in a hurry, yet Jesus stopped to ask who touched him.
I can imagine how impatient Jairus would have been as Jesus talked with this woman who touched him. He probably sat there and shook his head. Maybe his thoughts sounded like this,
Really Jesus? My daughter is dying, and you are worried about who touched you? Is that really more important than my daughter? This lady is healed, yet we stand here talking still.
She was outcast.
Not everyone understands that about her.
But she was.
She was different. She struggled with a problem, and no one could help her resolve it. But she didn’t let that hold her back. She knew Jesus could help her. So while the piles of people pressed in, she squeezed her way through. Not having the strength, or the ability to fight the crowds, she got down low and pressed on.
It’s interesting, from what we read, no one even helped her get closer. So by the time it happened. The entire crowd was confused. Jesus asks, “Who touched me?”
The disciples looked around. They could hardly breath the crowds were pressing in so hard. They were almost crushed. The disciples were pushed side to side, and struggled to walk. Yet Jesus is worried about who touched him? What does this mean?
So Peter answered, “master, the people are crowding and pressing against you.”
But Jesus said, “someone touched me; I know that power has gone out from me.”
What was Jesus saying?
Someone, had an encounter with him.
While everyone else, selfishly pushed in and tried to get close to Jesus, this woman desperately needed to touch him! It’s interesting, because this woman would have been seen by everyone. Because of her blood issues, she would have been deemed unclean. Chances are, no one was willing to help her.
So she was left to get close to Jesus on her own.
Why do we do that to people?
When I look at my kids, I am in love with them.
In all of their uniqueness and abilities, Through their personalities, likes, and dislikes, I can’t help but look at them, and think the world of them. In fact, it’s this love, that makes me willing to do anything for them.
If they were ever in trouble, I would do anything to help them. If they ever have fear, I will do whatever it takes to protect them. When they hurt, I truly hurt too. When the are down, I would give anything to lift their spirits!
I fall asleep thinking of them at night, and wake up looking for them right away. They are my closest friends - only second to my wife. And they have me, however they might need me!
I would do anything for them! Myself aside, I will always fight for them and love them no matter what!
To be honest, that’s pretty easy for me, as a parent. I look at them, and am so proud! They cause a sparkle in my eye, and a smile deep in my heart.
Do you know what that is like?
To have someone feel that way about you?
OH, you might not have every heard someone talk about you that way, but guess what? You have someone that feels that way about you!
The very creator of the universe, looks at you, and adores you!
You are the world to him!
I can see I’ve offended you.
Have you been there before? Knowing that you have done something that has hurt someone else or let them down? There is a feeling that comes with this.
Guilt.
It’s an ugly, lonely feeling. It can control you and hijack your thoughts.
When we have guilt, we become ashamed. Not wanting to show our face.
It can cause us to retreat, and push people away.
But did you know that guilt can be healthy. It causes us to re-evaluate and make different decisions. It can even bring about growth and change. We’ve made the word guilty so obnoxious and painful. But really, guilt is a response to admitting we’ve done wrong. Whether intentionally or not, guilt admits we’ve failed to meet an expectation.
There is extreme health to acknowledging guilt. It brings resolution. Without the recognition of guilt, we will never have reconciliation. It’s an important, healthy, feeling.
But does God want us to live in guilt? Or is that something working against us?
David writes the 143rd Psalm about this. He is in a time of feeling great sorry and misery. He says,
Lord, hear my prayer,
Listen to my cry for mercy;
In your faithfulness and righteousness come to my relief.
Do not bring your servant into judgment,
For no one living is righteous before you.
He is pleading with God. Don’t judge me solely on what is right. I have failed. But who doesn’t fail! Who is perfect nougat to be righteous before God?
But listen to how he describes the next part.
The enemy’s pursues me,
He crushes me to the ground;
He makes me dwell in the darkness like those long dead.
So my spirit grows faint within me;
My heart within me is dismayed.
What is he experiencing?
Guilt!
What would you do with infinite power and strength?
I think every kid, especially young boys, dream of having a super power -able to withstand any battle - or able to single handedly take on an entire villain army all at once. I remember even into my teenage years, dreaming about impressing my peers by being able to take on the strongest kid in class without even breaking a sweat.
They might throw a punch in my daydream and I would simply reach my hand up and grab their fist before it could hit me. Or maybe they punch me as hard as they can in the face, and I wouldn’t even budge or flinch. It’s intriguing, not because I sat there and thought about what good I might be able to do, but because of what the people around me might think.
We watch superhero movies and dream of being them, while wondering what was the bad guy thinking. Little kids run around pretending to be Iron Man or (my personal favorite) Batman. Their little minds can only be enticed by this thought of power and strength. As we get older we learn to mask such attraction, but the truth is, you and I sat through the entire Comic series allowing ourselves to be drawn straight into every dynamic character in the Marvel Cinematic Universe
There is an attraction to strength and power.
And the truth is, we are all attracted to it.
But let’s be honest. If I had infinite power. . . I would use it for good. . . . But starting with the good I want! I would hav a really hard time using it for antigen other than. .. ME !
The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it? These are the words of Jeremiah 17:9
What does that mean?
I have lots of ideas in my heart. I know what I want for my life, and what I hope to see happen. So why doesn’t it always turn out the way I planned?
Sometimes when I look back, I can see where my planning and my actions, actually contradicted what I wanted to see happen. I know the intent, I know the desired outcome. But for some reason, I see how I made decisions, and then act in a way, that completely led me in a different direction. It’s because of my heart. It is always in motion chasing after something. And sometimes, I fail to direct it. So it leads me in the wrong direction.
But thank God for his goodness. Without him, I would never see results that I hope for. That is why God is always correcting our step, and helping us align with him.
Good luck!
Have you ever had someone say that to you?
Have you ever said that to someone else?
I know it’s a pleasantry,
But think about what is wrapped up in that statement.
Good luck. . .
In others words,
There is no hope. So, here’s to throwing hope to the wind. Maybe something might accidentally come of it. Or maybe if you work hard enough, maybe something unlikely will happen.
It’s kind of a disappointingly hopeless sentiment.
At least go Star Wars on me, and say, “May the force be with you!
Then you are at least believing for a good outcome.
But Good luck. .. . It’s pointlessly hopeless.
There was a deep dark storm.
The kind that makes the hair on the back of your neck stick up.
Fierce, dark - storm clouds howled through the air, as rain pelted down like arrows from the sky. Steep waves crashed down with infinite power, as the tiny boat was tossed back and forth, being thrown from wave to wave. Loud thunder crackled through he storm, as bolts of lightning snapped across the bow of the boat.
The disciples, were terrified.
They were caught in the most life threatening moment they had ever experienced. And where was Jesus?
Sleeping. . . . .
Has it ever felt like Jesus was sleeping, when you needed him to answer.
Spring is in the air.
I woke this morning to the early sound of a robin singing a song just outside my window. It was carefree. The Robin didn’t know that the day was going to be long. It wasn’t concerned about what it would eat, or what it would wear. It just sang. A happy song of joy chirped into the early morning light.
When I first heard it, I was annoyed. I mean, the sun wasn’t even fully up yet.
But as I sat there listening, you could tell the carefree spirit of the bird.
I thought, what a life!
Not worrying about meetings of the day.
Not stressed over it’s studies, or grades.
Not overwhelmed by relationships
Just up early, singing and enjoying life.
Wouldn’t it be nice to wake up this way.
To wake up and not think about everything that was going to need your attention today. To not stress the pressures of success, finance, other people’s opinion. Wouldn’t life be much easier to escape those pressures!
Jesus thinks so too.
You are, a real treasure!
But sometimes, you don’t feel like one do you?
A man was walking, when he saw a field for sale. The field peeked his interest, so he decided to walk through the land. As he walked, something caught his eye. It wasn’t easily seen, it was covered in muddy dirt, and it was in the part of the land that seemed overrun. But he decided to dig around in the dirt anyway. And when he did, he found a priceless treasure. It was buried right there. Most people would have walked past it and not even given it a second glance. But this man found a priceless treasure.
In his excitement, he hurried the treasure, ran home, sold everything he had, and went back and bought the field. He was so excited to purchase such a land.
Imagine other people, as they watched this man buy this field. Some might have said, “What a waste of money! Doesn’t he know this field is worthless?”
Others may have even remarked, “This field? What good will ever come out of this field?”
But the man, didn’t care!
Why?
Because he knew the treasure that nestled deep in the dirt.
I would like to say that I am the type of person, that doesn’t worry.
But the truth is, I don’t worry. . . . I just think a lot!
My mind never shuts off.
When I lay down at night time, I can’t sleep.
I’m always processing the next big idea,
Or dreaming of what could be. . . .
It’s not like I’m worried about these things. I just think a lot. . . I mean A LOT!
I can’t stop my mind from going, even though I would love to just turn it off at times.
I’ve often pawned this off as a good thing,
After all, I’m not worrying, I’m just dreaming and thinking. . .
Quarantine.
That word seemed like a death sentence over the past couple of years. It came with questions, anxiety, and even doubt.
What if I never recover?
What if my final days are spent in isolation?
What if the rest of the world continues to carry on without me?
Sickness, in and of itself, is frustratingly difficult.
But when you add the isolation of quarantine, it makes it so much worse.
Over the past year, people from all walks of life faced quarantine.
It discriminated against none, and constantly pulled people into it.
But while a virus pulled millions of people into quarantine,
It wasn’t a new feeling for so many people.
Sure, this time it was attached to the uncertainty of a sickness.
But leading up to this, isolation has plagued people for years. You know that feeling - like you are all alone. The sense you get, when you realize you have no where to turn, no one to care. Sometimes it’s because of some friction between us and others. Other times, it’s just simply how we feel inside.
Alone.
Somewhere, in the twinkling of a star laced ceiling, where soft lavender fabrics and cushy pillows line warm areas of comfort, a young baby sighs. And in a gentle blink of an exhausted eye, they catch a familiar and safe glimpse of the loving arms rocking them to sleep. And as they drift slowly into a peaceful relaxation, they open their eyes one last time. Their eyes meet the soft glow of a night light, nestled gently in the corner of the room. And on it. . . A boat, with hipster styled animals standing confidently together, as they commemorate a profound story.
In fact, all throughout the room, lies hints of Noah, and his merry band of travelers.
This nursery isn’t unique. In fact, choirs of nurseries around the world, echo this same theme.
If you aren’t familiar with this story, It comes from the book of Genesis.
It’s a story of Noah, and his faithfulness to God.
IN a time when all men sought out selfish ambition,
And only did evil - all the time.
Noah desired what was right.
What happened next, is one of the most controversial stories in the Bible.
God instructs Noah to build an ark. And then bringing his family and a remnant of animals on board with him, God closes the doors. And then rain floods the earth and destroys every living thing that remained outside the boat.
Why?
Why did God do that?
Now the interesting thing about your answer to that question, is that it says more about how you view God, than it does anything else.
Why do the wicked prosper?
Have you ever watched someone, so undeserving, seem to get all sorts of reward. I’ve seen people get favored, and even receive honor, and the entire time, all I could think is - do you really know them?
It’s like the cool kids - who only care about themselves, only get more and more popularity and favor.
Or that coworker, who slips out the door early, and cuts corners to get the job done, seems to get bonus after bonus.
Listen to Proverbs 19:1-3
Better to be poor and honest
Than to be dishonest and a fool.
That’s easy to say, but the truth is,
those fools, don’t seem so foolish. . .
It sure seems like people can act selfish, greedy, ignorant, and evil, and still get rewarded and blessed.
In fact, sometimes, it almost doesn’t’ seem worth it to do the right thing. Why do the honorable thing when people get away with doing wrong. And even seem to prosper while doing evil?
When was the last time you had deep joy?
I’m not talking happiness. That’s different.
You see, happiness is a response for something I like. As soon as the thing that brought me happiness is gone, so is my happiness.
But joy, joy is different. Joy says, I don’t care what happens. I’m still good.
Joy can hear someone talk bad about us, and let it bounce right off us.
Joy takes a hard critique from a professor, or a bad review from a boss, and says, “lesson learned. Let’s move on and try again!”
It’s this type of joy that Nehemiah talks about when he says, “Don’t be dejected and sad, for the Joy of the Lord is your strength!”
He was telling them, we just read the word of the Lord, you see how you’ve missed the mark, and things aren’t how God intended. But don’t be dejected. There is a joy that will help you walk through this!
When was the last time you had that type of joy?
If you are like me, your thinking time, is more riddled with frustrations, concerns, and failures, than it is thoughts of joy.
Nehemiah is telling the people, you won’t find joy if you look at yourself. I think that’s because we as human beings, are competitive - which causes us to be critical of ourselves.. .
So we have to stop, take the pressure off ourselves to produce joy, and allow God to fill us with it. In fact, it’s the joy of the Lord, that gives us strength.
What do you do, when everything you’ve put your hands to, comes crashing to an end?
What is left, when you’ve done all that you can, but it wasn’t good enough?
Have you ever been there?
Have you ever had that moment, where everything you’ve known, fails to make sense?
It was a long night.
The disciples were out on the water, fishing.
It’s what they new best. And if what they were doing, when Jesus was around, was no longer what they were called to, then why not fish.
But wouldn’t you know it. Just like everything else in their life, it was an unsuccessful night! They caught NOTHING!
Peter probably slumped over the boat, feeling like a failure. After all, the night before Jesus was put to death, He denied Jesus three times. One of those times, he even cursed his name to a servant girl. In his time with Jesus, he had doubted him while walking on water, was told to Get behind Jesus as Satan, And he caped it off by denying him in his last moments.
Peter - felt like a failure. . .
But then, as the sun illuminated the edge of the beach, Peter saw a man calling out to them. Once he realized it was Jesus, He stood up, grabbed his outer cloak, and jumped into the water. Perhaps he expected to be able to walk on water again. Or maybe, he was just so hurt, that he was longing for a moment to seek a second chance.
After eating, Jesus pulled Peter to the side.
In this moment, we hear one of the most famous conversations.
Jesus asks Peter 3 different times, Do you love me? After Peter’s response, each time, Jesus says, then feed my sheep.
Now there is a lot of study on the words in this exchange between Jesus and Peter. While Jesus refers to an Agape - unconditional love, and Peter responds in a Phileo brotherly love, there is something even bigger happening here.
Jesus hoped to help Peter understand God’s unconditional love. Yet each time Jesus asks this, and Peter responds with a yes, there is a common command that follows. Then feed my sheep, or take care of my lambs.
Do you know what Jesus was really showing him?
That Peter’s purpose was not discarded because of his past. . .
After the first question of Peters love, Jesus reassigns him purpose. Feed my lambs.
And then two more times, Jesus reassures his purpose.
You see, this wasn’t about Peter being forgiven for denying Jesus, It wasn’t an attempt to get Peter to feel better about what had happened.
this was an invitation for Peter to be part of what Jesus was doing.
Peter walked on water.
But why?
What caused him to step out of a perfectly good boat,
And onto the turbulent waters of the sea?
Jesus didn’t ask him to.
In fact, Peter suggested it to him.
So why would he do it?
Perhaps, the answer to that, is one you and I can resonate with all too well.
It was a pretty adventurous day. Miracles were done, the gospel was preached, and people were ministered too, all without rest or food. Then word comes that John had been beheaded. And in an attempt to get away and rest, thousands of hungry, helpless people crowd around them on a remote hillside.
Being late in the day, they came to Jesus with concern - It’s late, and these people need to be fed.
But what does Jesus tell them?
“You give them something to eat!”
Listen to their response to Jesus in Mark 6:37
“That would take more than half a year’s wages! Are we to go and spend that much on bread and give it to them to eat?”
In other words,
Hold on! We’ve given everything we can. And now you want us to go and use up more energy and resource.
It’s a familiar feeling we don’t like to admit at times, but it sounds more like this,
What do you want from me? Do you see what I’ve already done? IS THERE NO END TO IT?
Why’s it so easy to expect the worse?
We can watch, as things unravel in front of us, and yet it’s so hard to see the possibilities of what could happen.
What if we were able to expect more!
What if we didn’t default to the negative - but were able to have a sense of hope, excitement, and expectation.
The idea was that Jesus and the disciples would get away.
After all, they were processing deep grief.
But as they went along, people kept following them!
Have you ever noticed, it’s when you need a break the most, that people seem to become more needy.
So they kept their heads down, and just kept moving on.
But as the boat approached, Jesus looked at the people.
His heart broke with deep compassion.
So he ministered to them. In fact, he ministered to them all day.
Soon the people were hungry.
The disciples came to Jesus, alerting him of the situation.
But Jesus instructed, “You give them something to eat.”
This is interesting, because just before they got there, Jesus acknowledged that they hadn’t eaten yet and they were worn out. So, he wanted to get away.
And yet now he tells them to feed the people?
I sat there listening to their words,
But I was unable to hear a singe word they were saying.
It was like - even though I was physically present, My soul had left me.
One burden, stacked on top of another burden, stacked on another, and another, and yet another
Left me feeling numb, tired, broken, and even lifeless.
And yet, I was there to give them answers.
So as I tried to listen,
My spirit had given up.
I couldn’t muster any more emotion. No words of encouragement, no spiritual insights, just empty - blank stares.
I would have stopped and taken a moment for myself, but that’s not how it’s supposed to be. People look to me for answers. They expect solution. But something inside of me, couldn’t take on one more care. It was like, I had nothing left to give.
Why do we feel guilty for that?
When we have spent every ounce of who we are, why don’t we feel ok taking a moment?
I think it’s because we feel like we will let someone down.
Maybe others
Maybe ourselves
Maybe God?
People’s sight has been restored,
A lame man, got up and walked for the first time in his life.
A widow’s son was mid-funeral, and He walked right up to those carrying his casket, placed his hand on the boy, and told him to get up! And the boy was raised to life!
What amazing things are happening.
Yet all John could do is wonder, “Then why am I still sitting here in this cell?”
John had been arrested and placed behind bars.
And while Jesus went around healing, John sat there decaying.
So when he heard the great things Jesus was doing, it was only natural that he would wonder.
You know, the same question you have asked. . .
I see you heal, I see you raise the dead, the blind see and the lame walk, but why am I still sitting here about to die?
Sometimes, it can feel like we’ve done everything right, we’ve answered the call God has placed on our life, and we’ve even worked at it with all of our heart. Yet when it comes to our deepest darkest moments, where are you God?
So John sends his disciples to Jesus with his rawest, most sincere question yet.
“Are you the Messiah we’ve been expecting, or should we be looking for someone else?”
Have you ever felt that before?
Because sometimes, things just don’t add up. We’ve seen him do the work, we’ve heard testimony of his power. Yet when it comes to our situation, nothing. . .
In these moments, it’s easy to be let down. But even more, it’s easy to question and doubt that Jesus even is the one we’ve been waiting for.
In a heartbreaking moment, Jesus answers the truth.
Luke 7:22 Jesus says, “Go back to John and tell him what you have seen and heard- the blind see, the lame walk, those with leprosy are cured, the deaf hear, the dead are raised to life, and the Good News is being preached to the poor.”
At first read, this sounds so calloused and heartless.
But not to John.
You see, John would have heard the stories of Angel Gabriel.
Who visited his father Zechariah in the temple that night.
And as Gabriel announced the upcoming birth of John the Baptist,
He declared John’s purpose?
John will make ready for the Lord, a people prepared for him. . .
You see what Jesus was actually doing. He was saying - well done. The blind see, the lame walk, those with leprosy are cured, the deaf hear, the dead are raised to life, and the Good News is preached to the poor. All of which was possible because of you John; the one who prepared people to even accept this.
A few moments later, Jesus would even recognize John as the greatest who has ever lived.
So why didn’t he save him from prison?
Because he was building a legacy on what John had started.
His riddles were so confusing.
But at risk of feeling stupid, everyone kept quiet about it.
He told stories that didn’t make sense,
Used every day scenarios that no one understood,
And even had to explain the meaning of his own explanations.
So this time, when he walked in and started talking, It was like a few of them were done with trying to decipher.
He told them that he had to leave, and that they couldn’t go with him. But don’t worry, I am preparing a place for you there. . .
They must have looked at each other with utter confusion.
You are leaving,
We can’t go with you
But you are preparing a place for us.
What is going on here!
Then Thomas, probably with his hands up in confusion, says to him, “Lord, we don’t know where you are going, so how can we know the way? “
To this, Jesus answers with another riddle.
“I am the way the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father Except through me. If you really know me, you will know my Father as well. From now on, you do know him and have seen him.”
After this answer, Philip jumps into the conversation.
Philip said, “Lord, just show us the Father, and that will be enough for us.”
It was like the disciples were ready for some simple answers.
Have you ever been there before?
Where you are tired of trying to figure out what God is saying, or what he is going to do. Have you ever felt like say, “enough is enough. Just show me the Father already, that will be enough.”
It’s easy to be confused, and even get frustrated trying to figure out what God is doing and what he would say to you through different situations. Sometimes it can even feel like he is speaking in riddles.
I hope you know, God isn’t trying to confuse you. He isn’t interested in leaving you with questions. Sometimes he is at work, preparing a place for you, while you are left to patiently wait to see what it looks like.
This can be confusing, and even tiring times.
I can still hear the chilling sound of the doors, as they slammed shut.
The cold, raw metal bars were designed to secure occupants into the room,
But loneliness, hopelessness, anxiety, pain, and suffering were complimentary room guests - free to come and go as they pleased.
Every wall, every corner, every surface of the ceiling and floor- was covered in sterile, lifeless, despair.
Privacy didn’t exist, and freedom was something found only in dreams.
This was prison.
It wasn’t meant to be pleasant.
It didn’t come with warm heartfelt moments.
It was heartbreaking, helpless, and impossible to get free from.
Fortunately this experience I tell you of, comes from my time as a guard in a prison.
But I know what that cell feels like.
I’ve seen it.
Stood in it.
And have even felt the dread of being locked up.
But while I was a guard in this prison. I’ve stayed in a prison of my own.
My thoughts.
I’ve had recurring feelings. Helpless emotions. And even lonely confinements.
I’ve felt the prison door of anxiety slam shut, as the isolation of depression echoed off lifeless walls of my heart.
In those moments.
I’ve been in despair.
You know that feeling? When you don’t know what else to do because you are so worn out, tired, frustrated, and just -done with the situation. It’s like you are locked in a prison cell with no way out.
In the book of Acts we read about Paul and Silas in prison. They have been locked away for doing the work of the Lord. They did nothing wrong, they only spoke truth and did what was right. It would be easy for them to be upset. In fact, I can imagine them being straight up angry!
They are locked in an inner cell, where there is no comfort, no privacy, and no hope.
I imagine they spent the evening wondering why they were there. They knew the unfairness of their sentencing. And they wrestled with it for hours. The other inmates were listening and probably even sympathizing with them. Everyone probably wondered how this could be happening.
But in the midnight hour, when they could’t rest, and when their minds wouldn’t shut off for a moment of peace. They had nothing left to do. Not understanding what say, or where to turn, they did the only thing they had left to do. They began to praise the Lord.
Listen to Acts 16:25 - About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the other prisoners were listening to them. Suddenly there was such a violent earthquake that the foundations of the prison were shaken. At once all the prison doors flew open, and everyone’s chains came loose.”
You see, when you praise the Lord, it has a way of setting captives free. The praise of the Lord is used to proclaim hope, speak life, and bring salvation to those in desperation.
You might be in a prison.
You might be frustrated beyond reason, hurt beyond repair, and even done with the situation. . . But I promise you, freedom is found in praising the Lord.
I know how impossible it is to shake free from the prison cell you find yourself in.
It’s hard to let go of thoughts, or to refocus your heart.
So let praise be the freedom you desire.
It’s funny,
Even God knows that praise to his name brings freedom.
Listen to Zepheniah 3:17
The Lord your God is with you,
The Mighty Warrior who saves.
He will take delight in you with gladness.
With his love, he will calm all your fears.
He will rejoice over you with joyful songs.
Even God sings over you while he rescues you. And when you need someone else to praise for you, turn on worship, soak it in, and let God grant you freedom.
So let me read this Pslam of praise on your behalf.
Listen to Pslam 100
Shout for joy to the Lord, all the earth.
Worship the Lord with gladness;
Come before him with joyful songs.
Know that the Lord is God.
It is he who made us, and we are his
We are his people, the sheep of his pasture.
Enter his gates with thanksgiving
And his courts with praise;
Give thanks to him and praise his name.
For the Lord is good and his love endures forever,
His faithfulness continues through all generations.
So, may you find a song of praise, deep in your heart.
May you find the strength to sing - in your weakest point
May worship accompany the breath and it crosses your lips
And May you find freedom, as you worship the Lord Today.
She had a deep, dark past
That brought shame and disappointment.
It hurt to walk in public, because everywhere she went, people knew her as, “That woman.” In fact it hurt so bad, she would find the most obscure, inconvenient, troublesome times to do regular every day tasks.
This day was no different.
It was normal for women to get out early, before the heat of the sun made the task unbearable. But just like any day, she waited for the moment where she would be free from the judgmental eyes of her peers. As the noon day sun began to take its tole, the well was finally empty. So she stepped from her home, and made her way through the hot dusty streets. No one ever went to the well at this time of day.
But as she approached, her plan had failed. For this time, a man sat there at the well, as if he were waiting for her. Her guard was instantly up. This never ended well for her. Surely he has heard of her reputation, and has either come to taunt her, or ridicule her.
As she begins to fill her jar with water, the man begins to speak with her.
“Will you give me a drink?”
His words startle her. For he was a Jew, and she a Samaritan. They had deep routed history of judgement and hatred. So she confronts her biggest fear. Convincing herself that he surely is taunting her, she admits the obvious.
“How can you ask me this. I am a Samaritan, and you are Jew.”
Her observation only emphasized the worth she felt of her self evaluation.
But Jesus, knew what she thought about herself. In fact, to prove it, he calls out her cause for deepest regrets.
I don’t feel like praising God right now. . .
Have you ever felt that way before?
It might be because you are frustrated,
Or It might be because something disappointing has happened
And in that disappointment, you find yourself struggling to praise God.
You haven’t forgotten him
You aren’t against him
You still believe him to be God and in control.
You just don’t have the words to praise him.
Sometimes when we walk through difficult moments, it steals the words from our lips, It strips the desire from our heart, and we are left with an inability to simply praise God.
The writer of the 43rd Psalm understands this dilemma.
Listen to verse 5 of this Psalm,
Why am I discouraged?
Why is my heart so sad?
I will put my hope in God!
I will praise him again -
My savior and my God!
The writer is battling something, and in that battle, their praise is gone.
The sadness of the heart,
And the discouragement of the situation,
Have completely robbed the writer of their praise.
Have you been there before?
That moment where you feel so discouraged, that you don’t even have the strength to bring praise to the Lord? It’s a real feeling. It’s not because you are evil, or even because you don’t love the Lord. You are simply trying to figure things out.
Listen to the first part of the Psalm.
Declare me innocent, O God!
Defend me against these ungodly people.
Rescue me from these unjust liars.
For you are God, my only safe haven.
Why have you tossed me aside?
Why must I wander around in grief,
Oppressed by my enemies?
Send out your light and your truth;
Let them guide me.
Let them lead me to your holy mountain,
To the place where you live.
There I will go to the altar of God
To God-the source of all my joy.
I will praise you with my harp,
O God, my God!
The writer starts with expressing their feelings of let down, hurt, fear, and grief.
They bring a word of discouragement and sadness first.
It’s only then, that they are able to realign.
God looked,
and there,
in the middle of the entire creation, placed in the most beautiful garden
Man was alone. . . .
It’s in that moment, God pronounces the most profound statement about man and his design.
He says, “It is not good for the man to be alone.”
The almighty creator, the one who designed and made mankind, the one who put man right into the middle of this peacefully beautiful world, recognizes this deep understanding. The human heart, will break on its own. Human beings were designed to be in relationship. They were designed for connection.
Alone, the human heart only hurts.
But it’s the next phrase that changes everything. In fact, it’s this phrase that so many people have gotten wrong, especially those inside of the church. God continues by saying, “I will make a suitable helper for him.”
Now this wasn’t God’s understanding of man’s loneliness,
This wasn’t his intent to make a woman as man’s sidekick, or understudy of some sort.
This was God’s recognition that man wasn’t in sync with creation yet.
God had created all things to work in harmony.
There was evening, and there was day
There was light, and there was dark
There was the dark sky, and then heavenly lights filled the void
There was the waters, and there were fish to populate them
There was the ground, and livestock of all kinds to roam the land
Man, however, was alone. He needed the next piece. Not to make him happy, or to do what he said. But to bring him into a purposed union with creation. Man needed his equal part that not only offset him, but gave him balance inside of creation.
My kids are getting older now, but it wasn’t long ago that they really believed I could do anything. After all, I’m dad. I can handle anything, I will protect them, and nothing can get past me.
Unfortunately, I’m human.
I can only do so much.
And as my kids get older, they realize I am a mortal human being, just like them.
But when they were younger, there was nothing better than that feeling, when the thought of danger, caused them to simply turn to me and raise their arms. I would pick them up, and they knew they were safe. After all, I was bigger, stronger, and more capable then them.
What a good feeling as their dad, but what a better feeling as a child. There is something amazing that happens when you know without a doubt that someone is protecting you and making sure you are alright.
Listen to the power in this Psalm.
God is our refuge and strength, Always ready to help in times of trouble. So we will not fear when earthquakes come And the mountains crumble into the sea. Let the oceans roar and foam. Let the mountains tremble as the waters surge!
I’m disgusting!
Have you ever looked at yourself this way?
It might be a dissatisfaction with the way you perform, maybe you feel shame towards your body, or maybe you’ve just felt like you don’t measure up.
I think we have all had a moment where we don’t feel very valuable.
I get frustrated with my weaknesses.
I dont’ know why I have to be so confrontational. It’ just comes natural for me.
I wish I wasn’t so impatient. I know it annoys others
I can’t figure out why I am critical at times.
If only I could be taller,
Have better hair,
Weigh less
Be more athletic
Be more likable.
Talk differently and have different gifting. . .
The list goes on! If I were to sit here and think about it too long, I can start to get depressed! In fact, I can start to wonder if I am even able to be liked. Am I a mistake? Can one person really be this annoying? Have this many problems? Be so stubborn and difficult?
It’s interesting to think that at my weakest, lowest, most offensive point, Christ died for me. Maybe it’s because he didn’t fully understand how awful and evil I am. Could that be the problem?
Pslam 139 would disagree with this. It’s a reminder that God not only knows every single things about me, but he loves me, and even more - wants to be around me. In fact, he won’t let me go!
I work hard!
I’m not just saying that, I really do work hard.
I’m the type of personality that is totally invested.
When I’m putting my mind to something, there is no stopping me.
I will push through, fight for, and even go to war over whatever it is I am working on.
But you know what really gets me tore up inside?
I feel like I can kill myself, even going above and beyond, only to have someone else come in and get credit. I also hate seeing people give half hearted efforts, and on top of that, they get praised because of their talents!
I give my all in everything I do!
I don’t expect thanks, or even a reward for what I do. I do it, because I believe in what I’m putting my hands to.
But that aside, I hate it when others are rewarded- when what they brought, was half hearted. When someone else gets infinite favor and all they did was show up, it crushes me! I think the sentiment you might relate to sounds like this - Well that’s not even fair!
when others are rewarded for what comes natural, it’s like we are devalued for working hard,
Just because of their specific gifting, they are getting all the attention. Their not fully invested, they don’t stay awake tossing and turning over results. They just come in smiling, waving, pointing to people, and walking out getting all the glory.
It makes me so angry!
When I was growing up, there was this song we sang in church all the time - As the deer pantith for the water. . . So my soul longeth after thee.
I grew up in more of a formal, nondenominational setting
where worship was completely disconnected from any sort of emotional experience. It was more liturgical. I remember watching adults sing the song with such confidence and peace. I felt so unworthy while they sang it.
I especially remember my teenage years. I would go from being in services where this song was sang, and walk out wondering why I had such questions. I dealt with frustration, confusion, and even anger at times.
I felt so hypocritical.
How could I sing such a song- if I wasn’t getting along with my family?
How could I worship to such lyrics -when I was in a fight with my friends?
Even worse, When a good friend, Sara died of cancer, - I didn’t feel comfort from the words of this song. I felt let down. I questioned God,. . . I didn’t long for him.
If I’m honest, there are times even now -
I know God is good.
I know God is in control
I even Know God loves me. . . .
But it’s easy to walk through things that hurt, and lose the desire to want to worship him.
Does that make me an awful person?
Am I evil, that there are times in my life where I have just been too exasperated to lift my voice in praise?
when was the last time you just opened your heart and allowed God to love you. No apologies, no excuses, no time to clean up your mess, or wash the smell of the pigs from your skin, just right where you are, unashamed acceptance for the love God has for you.
I think we have an easy time identifying as one of the sons or even understanding their positions, but somehow we walk away feeling forgiven - at best - instead of loved. This wasn’t a story of forgiveness. This was a deep, counterculturally radical statement, that profoundly announced the unashamed love of the Father.
The father said, “My son was lost, but now is found.”
Why?
Because he was out living a life away from the father?
Because he wasted his inheritance?
Because he dishonored or disrespected the Father?
No.
The son came back thinking he was only worthy to be a servant. He thought the only hope was for him to be a hired hand. You see, he had lost his identity as a child of the father.
And the father could see it all over his face.
So he placed a ring on his finger, a robe on his back, and proclaimed him as his son. The love of the father once again reclaimed the boy as his son.
Did you know that the father deeply loves you.
Jesus told this story so people would understand the depth of that love.
But sometimes we need to stop and be loved.
We need to forget what we’ve done, let go of how we feel, and simply be held in the arms of the Father.
Paul reminds us this in Romans 8:38-39
I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow - not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below - indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.
I’m impatient.
I don’t like to wait for anything!
Drive slow in front of me, and I might exercise my right to play my horn
Take your time walking, and you will see me go flying around you
When someone is trying to open something or move something and they are struggling, you can usually hear me say, “Just let me do it!”
I’m sure some of that also comes from being a control freak, but the truth is, I don’t like to wait for anything.
I get so impatient!
But you know when I’m the worst?
When I don’t see God answering my prayers.
I feel like there are times when I can ask and ask and ask God, and I can’t help but wonder,
DOES HE HEAR ME? Why isn’t he answering my prayer right now?
You know what happens when I get impatient?
I try to fix things myself! I say I’m waiting for God, but instead I’m working my solutions to death by day, or I’m tossing and turning at night, only to find myself more worn out, wondering if God will ever answer me.
Your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God. . . .
There was more to the sentence, but I imagine that Adam and Eve stood there in awe.
Perhaps they didn’t even know that they weren’t like God until that moment.
What was said to them created a deep question.
It’s the same question you and I struggle with all the time.
Am I good enough?
It’s easy to feel like we don’t measure up. We watch what other people present as their life and are quickly drawn into this comparison trap that gets us tangled up in our own thoughts.
Adam and Eve heard these words, and desired to be more. They wanted to know that they were just as worthy and strong. But what were they comparing themselves to?
The Almighty God.
So they gave in.
They ate the fruit that brought disobedience into the world.
And with it, came the endless pursuit that you and I struggle with today. . .
I have to compare.
I have the endless need to measure myself against those around me
And in the end, I must come out worthy. I must be the best!
I’m proud of you!
Those are words we all long to hear aren’t they?
It’s actually one of the earliest stages of development in a child. As they learn they are safe and cared for, they begin to look for approval from those around them. They long to find approval in the eye of those closest to them.
I’m no different.
I want to be liked.
I long for people to think highly of me.
I want others to say good things about me and want to be around me.
It’s just part of life.
But the hard part is, sometimes I can’t even be proud of myself. I know my thoughts. I know what I’ve done in life. I know how deceptively evil - and selfish - my heart can be at times.
No, those aren’t the parts we admit to others.
We don’t want people to think less of us. After all, we want approval!
What if God has a way of looking at us with complete approval. In fact, what if God has a way of looking at you and me, in the middle of our mess and chaos, and still says - Very Good!
But those who wait upon the Lord will renew their strength; they will mount up with wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not faint.
Isaiah 40:31 has always been one of my favorite verses.
It sounds so promising, doesn’t it?
Imagine running and not growing weary, walking and not fainting.
I don’t know if you have ever been in a session of exhaustion or not, but it can be so debilitating. I like to repeat this verse to myself in moments of depletion.
But it wasn’t until recently that I understood what this verse really means.
And I learned it, by watching a hawk.
Have you ever felt like quitting?
You know that moment when you can't take any more. It feels like your spirit is crushed and you have nothing lift to fight with. In those moments, what do you do with that pain?
It seems like we often think we shouldn't voice those feelings of weariness to God.
But what if I told you that Jesus expressed those very feelings to the Lord.
In this episode, we will look at how to express feelings of empty, tired, weariness. As we find blessing inside of committing our spirit to the Lord.
The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
What bold words from David.
I don't know about you, but I would love that to be what I was able to say. That's not my story, however.
In the 23rd Psalm, we see how David is able to get to the spot of saying that he lacks nothing. The surprising, yet comforting, thing is that he finds the peace to say it in the middle of the valleys.
As you receive this blessing today, may you be able to face even the darkest valley - the shadow of death. And in it, may you find way to say that the Lord leads you to a green pasture, where you lack nothing!
If I ask you to recall the last 5 good things that happened to you, would you be able to do it?
If so, answer this, is it easier to bring the good things to memory or the bad things?
It seems like it's easy for our mind to be plagued with the things we don't want, rather than the many great things that have happened for us.
In Psalm 13, David gives a cry we have all felt before. He says,
"How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever?"
From here, however, he continues to hep us understand how faithful and good God really is!
As you take this in, may your eyes be opened to understanding the faithful goodness of God!
May the dark clouds that tend to overcast our vision of God's goodness, begin to be illuminated as you once again see the goodness of God!
It's beautiful, isn't it.
The majestically pronounced splendor of creation.
I don't know how often you stop and actually see it, but when you do, it's impossible not to be in awe.
Yet did you know, that more beautifully majestic part piece of all creation is you?
God created you with the ability to echo the beauty of an awesome creator! He puts dominion and authority directly into His prized piece of creation. YOU!
In Psalm eight, the writer echoes,
"Oh, Lord, our Lord, How majestic is your name in all the earth!"
He stops and recognizes the awesome beauty of God. And then, with this in mind, recognizes the humbling honor to be placed right in the middle of such an intricate masterpiece.
As you listen to this episode, may it lead you to an understanding of the significant place you hold inside the creation of God.
May it cause you to smile as you look at the beauty around you, and may it give you the voice, to echo such creation!
Why am I so easily offended?
Sometimes, it's the most ignoble people in my life that can have the loudest effect on how I feel.
I think about what they say.
I stew about how they acted.
And I often lend myself prisoner to the stupidity of dishonorable people around me.
This is a natural feeling that we have all felt before!
But what if this feeling was deeply connected by a bigger fear. What if this feeling is actually directly tethered to my concern that God himself wouldn't remember me.
In episode two, we take a moment to be honest with how we feel. As we confess our true hurt, listen to Psalm 3 and how King David reconciles his offense. In all of his splender, and with a heart designed to chase after God, David still takes pause, and confesses his fear to God.
May this inspire you!
May you walk away from this time together with a renewed reminder that God hears you and fights for you. May you know that God not only understands the offense you feel, but also fights to deliver you in the middle of your trial!
Why do others always prosper?
It feels like I can try harder and harder, yet everyone I see seems to have more success than I do.
why do I always feel like I can't get ahead?
In this episode, we will look at Psalm one and see what King David has to say about this. Maybe, when looking closely at this Psalm, we will see a more realistic formula for achieving true success!
By the end of this blessing, I pray you find true success! I pray that God releases you from the dangers of comparison, and shows you what it really looks like to truly - prosper!
Why do others always prosper?
It feels like I can try harder and harder, yet everyone I see seems to have more success than I do.
why do I always feel like I can't get ahead?
In this episode, we will look at Psalm one and see what King David has to say about this. Maybe, when looking closely at this Psalm, we will see a more realistic formula for achieving true success!
By the end of this blessing, I pray you find true success! I pray that God releases you from the dangers of comparison, and shows you what it really looks like to truly - prosper!
Why do others always prosper?
It feels like I can try harder and harder, yet everyone I see seems to have more success than I do.
why do I always feel like I can't get ahead?
In this episode, we will look at Psalm one and see what King David has to say about this. Maybe, when looking closely at this Psalm, we will see a more realistic formula for achieving true success!
By the end of this blessing, I pray you find true success! I pray that God releases you from the dangers of comparison, and shows you what it really looks like to truly - prosper!
Do you know what happens, when we suppress our inner turmoil and emotions?
It blocks our ability to properly love God. And if it doesn’t complete block our love, it at least blocks our ability to express our love for God.
But what if we stopped and acknowledged the messy pieces around, and even in us?
What if we took a moment to not only acknowledge the hurts and pains of life, but to stop, process, and command blessings over the way we feel?
Blessed soul is designed to start the day off by addressing real, sometimes hurt filled emotions, feelings, and worries, in an attempt to speak blessing in their place - To reason with conflicting daily life, to seek direction and health over the pieces of wholeness that long to resuscitated deep within us.
Through our time together, my prayer is that you find way to reconcile the pieces of you that long to Love God with heart, soul, mind, and strength, yet need the permission to heal.
And We will learn to do this through the scriptures!