Art That Overcomes: Recent Episodes

Jennifer Kramer

The narcissist isn’t in charge anymore. It’s your turn, Overcomer.

You’ll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today.

To view the art image discussed in the episodes, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here:

https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

Let's finish our conversation about taking control over your emotions so that you're not hurt by the narcissist again.

How do we stay centered and in control of our emotions when we have to continue communicating with the narcissist?

This is a tough one, for sure.

It all starts with addressing the trauma that is stored inside our bodies. When you become anxious or enraged at the abuser, you're not merely having an emotional reaction -- you're experiencing a trauma response.

This month on the Art That Overcomes podcast, I'm sharing a very special series with you. And last week I explained that meditation is a great place to start with addressing these emotional reactions (trauma responses).

Today you'll hear me walk you through a simple art and writing exercise to help you further explore the topic discussed on last week's episode, where I answered a question that was submitted from one of the Overcomers in my online community. This art and writing exercise was specifically created by me to help you explore today's topic for yourself and continue healing and transforming from victim, to survivor, to Overcomer.

This art task will help you take the concept of a meditation practice a step further, by adding a visual, and a mantra (or two or three).

The audio that you'll hear in the episode is taken from my free course, Overcoming With Jennifer, that can be found in my coaching app, Redefined - by Jennifer Kramer. To check out the rest of the course, scroll down to the link below.

Here's the link to all the things:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

How do you prevent being hurt by the narcissist again down the road (when you can't go no contact)?

I know from first hand experience that this is one of the most difficult challenges to overcome.

All the advice you read on the internet about how to heal after narcissistic abuse emphasizes the importance of going "no contact".

But what if you can't???

What if you have to co-parent with your abuser?

What if you're still tied to them through other family relationships?

It all comes down to YOU controlling YOUR emotions. Because that's the number one thing that the narcissist knows just how to get ahold of, and you simply cannot afford to let them do that anymore.

I think you'll get a lot out of these practical tips...

This month on the Art That Overcomes podcast, I'm sharing a very special series with you.

Today you'll hear me answer a question that was submitted from one of the Overcomers in my online community, and then next week I'll share an art and writing exercise specifically created by me to help you explore today's topic for yourself and continue healing and transforming from victim, to survivor, to Overcomer.

The audio that you'll hear in the episode is taken from my free course, Overcoming With Jennifer, that can be found in my coaching app, Redefined - by Jennifer Kramer.

Here's the link to all the things:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Let's finish our conversation about trusting yourself and trusting others...

This can really be a challenging concept to grasp if you've never fully trusted your own inner voice...always people pleasing and deferring to others.

In my experience, I've found that just like any skill in life, learning to trust your intuition starts with small steps that eventually add up to big results.

This month on the Art That Overcomes podcast, I'm sharing a very special series with you.

Today you'll hear me walk you through a simple art and writing exercise to help you further explore the topic discussed on last week's episode, where I answered a question that was submitted from one of the Overcomers in my online community. This art and writing exercise was specifically created by me to help you explore today's topic for yourself and continue healing and transforming from victim, to survivor, to Overcomer.

This art task offers a chance to make small choices. There's freedom within the creative process. It's a no-judgment zone, and there's no wrong answer.

Take a few minutes for yourself.

Listen to the episode and try the art task.

Explore.

Play.

Go with your gut.

The narcissist isn't here to criticize you now. YOU are in charge.

(The audio that you'll hear in the episode is taken from my free course, Overcoming With Jennifer, that can be found in my coaching app, Redefined - by Jennifer Kramer.)

Here's the link to all the things:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Will I ever trust myself or others again?

This is so foundational to your healing.

Once you begin to trust yourself again (or maybe for the first time), so much is going to open up for you.

How do I know for sure?

I've been there.

And it's my mission to teach you everything I've learned so that you can start feeling confident an empowered to live your own life...NOW.

This month on the Art That Overcomes podcast, I'm sharing a very special series with you.

Today you'll hear me answer a question that was submitted from one of the Overcomers in my online community, and then next week I'll share an art and writing exercise specifically created by me to help you explore today's topic for yourself and continue healing and transforming from victim, to survivor, to Overcomer.

The audio that you'll hear in the episode is taken from my free course, Overcoming With Jennifer, that can be found in my coaching app, Redefined - by Jennifer Kramer.

Here's the link to all the things:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Hey there, Overcomer! Today I’m sharing the final lesson of the four most important lessons I have learned from art and the practice of art therapy. If you haven’t heard my first three, you can go back and catch the last three episodes… Okay, so here is thing number 4 that art and art therapy have taught me:

Art has taught me to play, to let go, and to trust my intuition.

Narcissistic abusers have trained us (they’ve brainwashed us) to not trust ourselves, to always defer to them, to please them, to not consider our own wants and needs.

We need to learn to trust ourselves again, and we can learn to do that within the safe space of the artmaking process.

We can play, we can let go.

I always say within the creative process, there is no impulse control required. As long as you’re not damaging property or damaging or hurting yourself, or hurting others, you can do what you want.

Within the safe space of the piece of paper, of the artwork, you are free to let go. To practice what it feels like in your body to trust yourself, to trust your decisions.

I encourage you… Play with that!

Play with what you can create!

It’s safe.

Trust yourself. (or if that seems scary, at least give it some practice)

I’ve shared some of this story before on the podcast fairly recently…I can’t remember where, but I thought it relevant to share here too:

Back when I was an art student in college (in undergrad, before going back to school to study art therapy), I got to a place mentally and emotionally with my art where I think I was on the verge of being burned out, and I was getting sick of all the pressure I felt to create “good” art.

GIVEAWAY!

Here's what to do to get a free copy of my book, The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse: How I Used Art to Break the Pattern and Redefine My Identity.

Subscribe to this podcast (if you haven't already).
Rate this podcast (5 stars is my favorite!)
Write a review for this podcast.
Take a screenshot of your review and email the photo to me at jennifer@jenniferakramer.com. Or send it to me in a DM on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@jenniferannekramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@art_that_overcomes⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Then I'll respond to get your mailing address and send your book!

Here's the link to all the things:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Hey there, Overcomer! Today I’m sharing another one of my top 4 important lessons I have learned from art and the practice of art therapy. This is number 3.. So if you haven’t heard my first two, you can go back and catch the last two episodes… Alright, so number 3 thing that art and art therapy have taught me:

We know that trauma is stored in our body, in our nervous system. So, the most effective trauma treatments and even self help activities are ones that engage our physical bodies. One way to do this is through the art media. I shared in last week’s episode about how fluid media can help us be more expressive with our feelings, and resistive media can help us rein it in and feel more in control.

On top of that, here are a few other techniques to add to your artmaking practice that will take the therapeutic aspect of artmaking even further...

(tune in to hear more!)

GIVEAWAY!

Here's what to do to get a free copy of my book, The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse: How I Used Art to Break the Pattern and Redefine My Identity.

Subscribe to this podcast (if you haven't already).
Rate this podcast (5 stars is my favorite!)
Write a review for this podcast.
Take a screenshot of your review and email the photo to me at jennifer@jenniferakramer.com. Or send it to me in a DM on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@jenniferannekramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@art_that_overcomes⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Then I'll respond to get your mailing address and send your book!

Here's the link to all the things:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Listen up! This will change your life!

Hey there, Overcomer! Today I’m sharing an important lesson I have learned from art and the practice of art therapy. And it might sound a bit out there at first…

But here it is:

You can strategically use different art media in order to access and have an effect on your emotions in different ways. I think this feels straight up magical!

So, let me explain…

All art media can be categorized on a spectrum from fluid to resistive...

GIVEAWAY!

Here's what to do to get a free copy of my book, The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse: How I Used Art to Break the Pattern and Redefine My Identity.

Subscribe to this podcast (if you haven't already).
Rate this podcast (5 stars is my favorite!)
Write a review for this podcast.
Take a screenshot of your review and email the photo to me at jennifer@jenniferakramer.com. Or send it to me in a DM on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@jenniferannekramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@art_that_overcomes⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Then I'll respond to get your mailing address and send your book!

Here's the link to all the things:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Hey there, Overcomer! Today I’m sharing an important lesson I have learned from art and the practice of art therapy. And it’s a bit controversial….

You don’t need therapy for EVERYTHING.

There it is! I said it! Now, here’s why…

We deceive ourselves into thinking that there’s something magical about the therapy process, to the point where sometimes we can even become dependent on our therapist. We can get trapped in the mindset that we can’t do anything without “professional help”.

Now, don’t get me wrong, therapy is amazing! I’m a licensed art therapist. I work with clients. I have been a client in therapy off and on for many years. We need that! But it is not the Holy Grail, it is not the fix all for everything.

We need to learn to implement some skills ourselves...

(tune in to hear more!)

GIVEAWAY!

Here's what to do to get a free copy of my book, The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse: How I Used Art to Break the Pattern and Redefine My Identity.

Subscribe to this podcast (if you haven't already).
Rate this podcast (5 stars is my favorite!)
Write a review for this podcast.
Take a screenshot of your review and email the photo to me at jennifer@jenniferakramer.com. Or send it to me in a DM on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@jenniferannekramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@art_that_overcomes⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Then I'll respond to get your mailing address and send your book!

Here's the link to all the things:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

We’ve all heard the phrase, “too much of a good thing.”

This thought is usually associated with the concept of moderation.

For example, ice cream is yummy, but eating it all day every day would be too much of a good thing.

It wouldn’t be healthy for your body.

You’d feel like crap.

You wouldn’t be getting all the nutrients that your body needs.

Ice cream in moderation, however…as a dessert after a meal every once in a while, can be a good thing. It’s fun, it’s enjoyable.

It’s a good thing in moderation, but not in excess. And most of us would agree with this, when it comes to ice cream.

In my observation, there are a decent number of people out there in the world who do not agree with the concept of “too much of a good thing” when it comes to positivity, or having a positive attitude.

Rather, many people view this as the goal! Their goal in life is to achieve a constant state of bliss and happiness.

On last week’s episode of Art That Overcomes, entitled, My 3 Tips to Reframe Negative Self Beliefs, I talked about the importance of feeling all of our feelings. We can’t selectively numb certain emotions. I think that sometimes people who are feeling down or depressed try to squash their uncomfortable and unwanted emotions, only to find themselves unintentionally shutting down their happiness and joy as well… to a point where they may not be feeling much of anything, or at least aren’t aware of what they’re feeling.

On the flip side, I think there are plenty of people who are SO incredibly uncomfortable with what they perceive as “negative” emotions, that they do their very best to appear very positive on the surface, all the time. But they’re not necessarily any better off than their depressed counterparts.

The truth that I want to confront you with today is that these two types of people are actually very similar...

(tune in to hear more!)

GIVEAWAY!

Here's what to do to get a free copy of my book, The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse: How I Used Art to Break the Pattern and Redefine My Identity.

Subscribe to this podcast (if you haven't already).
Rate this podcast (5 stars is my favorite!)
Write a review for this podcast.
Take a screenshot of your review and email the photo to me at jennifer@jenniferakramer.com. Or send it to me in a DM on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@jenniferannekramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@art_that_overcomes⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Then I'll respond to get your mailing address and send your book!

Here's the link to all the things:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

We’ve all got a story to tell about ourselves.

And whether your story is negative, positive, or a little bit of both is completely up to you.

If you’re thinking: “Well, somewhat… But so much of what has happened to me has been out of my control!”...then let’s break this down a bit more.

Yes, of course you can’t control everything that’s happened to you. We especially tend to think of this lack of control when it comes to the bad or stressful experiences in life.

The abuse.

The betrayal.

The job loss.

The deaths.

The storm.

And on, and on, and on.

Yes, life happens to us. BUT, at the risk of sounding totally cliched, I want to remind you that YOUR REACTION to events in your life is most definitely within your control. Your reactions MATTER...So much!

And how do we get to a place where we can actually control our reactions?

It all starts with our mindset.

The thoughts we have influence the emotions we feel and the behaviors (or reactions) that result.

When we continually think in negative terms, always assuming the worst, or maybe even hoping for the best but still expecting the other shoe to drop (so to speak)....... This can become a sort of self-fulfilling prophecy.

I spent the last three episodes of the Art That Overcomes podcast talking about the concept of manifesting the life we want. I believe that we can, to a large extent, create the life that we desire for ourselves. But this doesn’t just work when we’re thinking about creating our desired reality (the good stuff that’s on our vision board).

The concept of manifestation also applies to some of the negative repercussions that happen after difficult, stressful, or traumatic events in our lives.

Let me be clear that I do NOT think you are responsible for the trauma and abuse you have endured. I do NOT believe that if something bad happens in your life (like a tornado taking out your house, a family member dying, or any other loss or hardship) that you somehow deserve it or you brought it on due to your negative thinking.

HOWEVER, some people choose to frame their suffering as an inevitable and inherent part of WHO THEY ARE.

Some people (and yes I can acknowledge that I’ve been in this place too) can get so used to suffering, hardship, and abuse that they just expect it and therefore actually integrate this kind of experience into their sense of self.

GIVEAWAY!

Here's what to do to get a free copy of my book, The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse: How I Used Art to Break the Pattern and Redefine My Identity.

Subscribe to this podcast (if you haven't already).
Rate this podcast (5 stars is my favorite!)
Write a review for this podcast.
Take a screenshot of your review and email the photo to me at jennifer@jenniferakramer.com. Or send it to me in a DM on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@jenniferannekramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@art_that_overcomes⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Then I'll respond to get your mailing address and send your book!

Here's the link to all the things:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Hey, Overcomer… welcome back to this special little podcast series called What Are Your Manifesting? Today I’m excited to bring you the final part, episode 3 of the series. If you haven’t listened to parts 1 and 2 yet, I suggest you scroll down and click play on those episodes first. Then I’ll still be here when you get back.

One of the words that came up for me as I was doing the art and writing exercise suggested in last week’s episode was NEW.

As a refresher, I was drawing an image to represent how I want my life to feel.

If I woke up tomorrow, everything was different, and my stressors had disappeared, what would I see? What would be the first sign? How would I feel?

And I keep coming back to the word, NEW.

The entire foundation for my Redefined coaching program and everything that I do here online and on the podcast to help women who are overcoming the lasting effects of narcissistic abuse is centered on exploring the concept of identity. I also talk a lot about this in my book, The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse.

In my experience both personally and professionally, after a certain point it really doesn’t matter how much therapy, coaching, or other personal development things we’ve done if we don’t know who we are, at our core....

(tune in to hear more!)

GIVEAWAY!

Here's what to do to get a free copy of my book, The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse: How I Used Art to Break the Pattern and Redefine My Identity.

Subscribe to this podcast (if you haven't already).
Rate this podcast (5 stars is my favorite!)
Write a review for this podcast.
Take a screenshot of your review and email the photo to me at jennifer@jenniferakramer.com. Or send it to me in a DM on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@jenniferannekramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@art_that_overcomes⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Then I'll respond to get your mailing address and send your book!

Here's the link to all the things:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Last week on Art That Overcomes, I encouraged you to consider whether you are operating out of an “unhealed” energy, or a “healed” energy.

I always emphasize that our healing journey is endless, so there’s no one, perfect endpoint or destination to this journey that we’re all striving for… but that said, it’s ideal to actually be moving along on that journey at any given time…or most of the time, anyway…at least moving...not stuck.

Movement means we’re living out of this healed or healing energy.

In contrast, operating from the “unhealed” place of being stuck in a victim mindset, hyper focused on your abuser’s behaviors, and/or constantly reading or watching YouTube videos about trauma, abuse, and narcissism will all just keep you stagnant… not actually moving toward your dreams and goals.

Heck, you may not even be able to identify a goal…

When I talk with clients and potential clients about their goals for the future, some people have a really good idea of what they’re moving towards.

Whether their dream is very tangible and practical, such as living in a certain place, having a certain type of relationship or job, etc., or whether it’s pretty simple and elusive, like they just want to feel “peace”, or “rest”, or “confidence”.... Either way, it’s a goal. A dream.

Something that they can identify they’d like to have or achieve in their life.

But it’s not uncommon for others to tell me that they have no idea what their goal is. It’s like their mind is totally blank when it comes to dreaming about a future of their choosing.

If this is you (or if you’ve been there before), it makes sense...

GIVEAWAY!

Here's what to do to get a free copy of my book, The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse: How I Used Art to Break the Pattern and Redefine My Identity.

Subscribe to this podcast (if you haven't already).
Rate this podcast (5 stars is my favorite!)
Write a review for this podcast.
Take a screenshot of your review and email the photo to me at jennifer@jenniferakramer.com. Or send it to me in a DM on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@jenniferannekramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@art_that_overcomes⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Then I'll respond to get your mailing address and send your book!

Here's the link to all the things:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Welcome to episode one of a three part series that I am calling, What are You Manifesting?

Now, the term “manifestation” can mean different things to different people. For the purpose of this series, what I mean by this question is basically, “what are you creating in your life?”.

I’ll talk more about my thoughts on manifestation in part two. But today, let’s lay a little more groundwork first…

Sometimes, in our journeys of healing from narcissistic abuse, or whatever other trauma we’ve experienced, we unintentionally keep ourselves stuck in the beginning stage of healing.

One way we do this is to stay in what I call the “information gathering phase”.

Are you an information gatherer?

I was definitely in this phase for a long time after leaving an abusive relationship. The tricky part is that being an information gatherer is really beneficial, in the beginning....

GIVEAWAY!

Here's what to do to get a free copy of my book, The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse: How I Used Art to Break the Pattern and Redefine My Identity.

Subscribe to this podcast (if you haven't already).
Rate this podcast (5 stars is my favorite!)
Write a review for this podcast.
Take a screenshot of your review and email the photo to me at jennifer@jenniferakramer.com. Or send it to me in a DM on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@jenniferannekramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@art_that_overcomes⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Then I'll respond to get your mailing address and send your book!

Here's the link to all the things:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠

The power of art to act as a mirror for the artist (a way to reflect back the artist’s thoughts, emotions, and sense of self) is not a concept unique to the field of art therapy.

If you’ve ever created art, in any discipline (music, dance, theater, writing, or visual art) then you likely know what I’m talking about. There’s something about engaging in a creative project that forces you to look at yourself, your identity, and even your place in the world.

And this requires a lot of bravery. It requires the courage to look at yourself in a raw and honest way. It’s not for the faint of heart!

But I think you’ll find that the most powerful and impactful art out there in the world was created with this type of courage and raw vulnerability....

...creative and artistic expressions connect us to each other. AND, they connect us to ourselves. Art has the power to mirror ourselves back to us, and when shown to others, has the power to mirror others too.

GIVEAWAY!

Here's what to do to get a free copy of my book, The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse: How I Used Art to Break the Pattern and Redefine My Identity.

Subscribe to this podcast (if you haven't already).
Rate this podcast (5 stars is my favorite!)
Write a review for this podcast.
Take a screenshot of your review and email the photo to me at jennifer@jenniferakramer.com. Or send it to me in a DM on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠@jenniferannekramer⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠@art_that_overcomes⁠⁠⁠⁠
Then I'll respond to get your mailing address and send your book!

Here's the link to all the things:

⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠

Our brains naturally want to keep us in survival mode, ready for the next threat around the corner….just in case. It’s a trauma response that is designed to help us when there's an imminent threat to our safety. But it does not serve us well once we’re safe from the abuse and don’t have an immediate reason to stay on high alert all the time.

In order to heal, we need to live life in between therapy sessions, reflect on how far we’ve come (even if it’s only an inch and you want to reach one mile), and save the trauma memories for certain special occasions only (like therapy, for example). Last week I talked about working toward a place in our healing where we feel safe returning home to ourselves…. Where we feel at home with ourselves.

From my perspective as a spiritual person and a Christian, I also believe it’s important to remember that God is our victor (he’s the ultimate hero) and he’s carrying us through to victory over our suffering and pain.

We are our own heroes too, don’t get me wrong! But I believe that my God, my Creator, is ultimately the one sustaining me. The truth is I wouldn’t be where I am today without God. My faith is integral to how I healed using this art and writing process that I teach.

That’s why I’ve worked some of this into my Redefined Process coaching program…an opportunity to invite God’s spirit into our art and writing process, so we can hear insight from his spirit within us, not only from our subconscious mind. I feel like if I’m not honest in sharing about my faith in this context, then I’m not only failing to give you my full story, but I’m failing to give you all the tools that I’ve found to be successful.

I remember early on in my journey of breaking away from narcissistic abuse, when I was still contemplating how to leave an abusive relationship....

(tune into hear more!)

GIVEAWAY!

Here's what to do to get a free copy of my book, The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse: How I Used Art to Break the Pattern and Redefine My Identity.

Subscribe to this podcast (if you haven't already).
Rate this podcast (5 stars is my favorite!)
Write a review for this podcast.
Take a screenshot of your review and email the photo to me at jennifer@jenniferakramer.com. Or send it to me in a DM on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠@jenniferannekramer⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠@art_that_overcomes⁠⁠⁠
Then I'll respond to get your mailing address and send your book!

Here's the link to all the things:

⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠

I believe that we were all created to thrive. We were designed for it. You have a purpose here on this earth, whether you know it or not.

Period.

You were created for so much more than your trauma story.

SO. MUCH. MORE.

And it’s okay to feel that…to really own it. It’s not arrogant or rude or self absorbed or self-righteous to say, “I have value! I have worth! I have a purpose!” and “I was created and designed intentionally by my God to be exactly who I am, right now.”

There’s NOTHING wrong with you.

There’s nothing WRONG with you.

There’s nothing wrong with YOU.

Now, of course no one is perfect, and I’m not claiming that you are. I’m certainly not perfect either. We all have room to grow and advance and evolve into more and more of who we were created to be.

But that doesn’t have to mean that you are wrong or bad right now, as you are. You are simply a version of you. There have been many past versions, and there will hopefully be many more to come. And it’s up to YOU whether those future versions of yourself are growing and growing, and healing and healing some more…and becoming more and more free and self expressed.

You shouldn’t feel any guilt if you’re kinda stuck right now…. Still trying to figure out how to get to the next version. Let me say that again…. You shouldn’t feel guilty. Just because it’s up to you to heal and grow doesn’t mean you need to feel guilt or shame if you think you’re not growing in the way that you should, or not growing and changing fast enough.

GIVEAWAY!

Here's what to do to get a free copy of my book, The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse: How I Used Art to Break the Pattern and Redefine My Identity.

Subscribe to this podcast (if you haven't already).
Rate this podcast (5 stars is my favorite!)
Write a review for this podcast.
Take a screenshot of your review and email the photo to me at jennifer@jenniferakramer.com. Or send it to me in a DM on Instagram ⁠⁠@jenniferannekramer⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠@art_that_overcomes⁠⁠
Then I'll respond to get your mailing address and send your book!

Here's the link to all the things:

⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠

Hey there, Overcomer.

I believe that YOU were designed with a purpose, a passion, and a mission all your own.

Yes, YOU.

I believe this is true because I also believe that you were created by a creative Creator.

On today's episode, I want to share with you a recording that is available within my Redefined coaching app. This is from a video included in one of four video bundles that I offer to those paying for my monthly Redefined Membership.

I'm offering it for free to you today on the podcast because I thought it would be a great way to kick off a conversation about the topic of spirituality as it relates to our identity….our sense of self…our sense of purpose and who we are in the world and how we relate to others.

After the recording, I hop back on in this episode to share some additional thoughts AND the exact art and writing prompts that are included with this recording inside of my Redefined app.

You were created for so much more than your trauma story.

I've packed a lot of value into this episode, just for you.
I hope you’ll give it a listen.

GIVEAWAY!

Here's what to do to get a free copy of my book, The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse: How I Used Art to Break the Pattern and Redefine My Identity.

Subscribe to this podcast (if you haven't already).
Rate this podcast (5 stars is my favorite!)
Write a review for this podcast.
Take a screenshot of your review and email the photo to me at jennifer@jenniferakramer.com. Or send it to me in a DM on Instagram ⁠@jenniferannekramer⁠ or ⁠@art_that_overcomes⁠
Then I'll respond to get your mailing address and send your book!

Here's the link to all the things:

⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

It can be really hard for me to stay present. Like, really hard! My mind is prone to wander and I could literally spend hours daydreaming and not get bored. I attribute some of this tendency to my introverted, artist brain who would rather live in fantasy and watch the clouds roll by, thinking in detail about all the vacations I want to take, the clothes I’ll wear, how I’ll feel, what art I’ll be making, and who will be with me on my adventures… than actually do anything that others would qualify as “work” or “practical” things, or “adulting”. But honestly a lot of this tendency to daydream is still due to the effects of trauma.

Daydreaming and living in fantasy land is a way that I dissociate. It’s a way that I find myself automatically zoning out in an attempt to seek pleasure. It’s a go-to when I’m tired, restless, anxious, or sick. It feels better than being overwhelmed or feeling guilty because I’ve procrastinated so much. In those moments, I’d rather dream about a beach vacation, or the next big art project, than actually take action to help me achieve that thing in reality. But, if you’ve been around here long enough, or have done any kind of therapy or coaching yourself, then you know that this dissociation ultimately doesn’t serve me very well. And it doesn’t serve you either.

Daydreaming itself can be good, to a certain extent, in the sense of helping me create a vision for the future, and visualizing my future and feeling the feelings of having already achieved those goals can help me get in the energy of who my Future Self will be. But at some point I simply have to be able to return to the present and take action.

Today, I’m sharing all about my practice of learning to be present, along with a few other important “P” words… pause, persistence, and patience.

GIVEAWAY!

Here's what to do to get a free copy of my book, The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse: How I Used Art to Break the Pattern and Redefine My Identity.

Subscribe to this podcast (if you haven't already).
Rate this podcast (5 stars is my favorite!)
Write a review for this podcast.
Take a screenshot of your review and email the photo to me at jennifer@jenniferakramer.com. Or send it to me in a DM on Instagram @jenniferannekramer or @art_that_overcomes
Then I'll respond to get your mailing address and send your book!

Here's the link to all the things:

https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

Who gets to decide what real art is…and who the real artists are? And if a piece of artwork is good or not?

Do you have to exhibit artwork for others to see? Do you have to perform on a stage or on video?

Today I’m sharing my two cents on this topic.

Here's the link to all the things!

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Go here to view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, order "The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse", or to grab the Intro and Chapter 1 for free :)

I am so excited for you to get a copy of my book, ‘The Uncommon Guide to Healing from Narcissistic Abuse: How I Used Art to Break the Pattern and Redefine My Identity’! Both Kindle e-book and paperback versions are available on Amazon, right now!!I can’t wait for you to start reading it, completing the art and writing exercises at the end of each chapter, and experiencing some big aha moments.Will you order either the e-book or paperback this week? Or better yet, order one for yourself, and one for a friend? Here's the link to all the things!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Go here to view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, order "The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse", or to grab the Intro and Chapter 1 for free :)

Whenever I find myself in the midst of an overwhelming trauma reaction…you know…the fight, flight, freeze, or fawn type of response… when I can tell that something deep within me has REALLY been triggered, it always comes back to my inner child. In those situations, there’s some aspect of the trigger that has brought my wounded childhood part to the forefront. I can usually tell this is what’s going on, by the type of behavior that results. Often, for me, I either shrink back and isolate out of insecurity and social anxiety, OR I go into full on fight mode and throw a tantrum…I have a big temper outburst where I feel compelled to yell and slam a door.

Over the years, my art and writing process has, time and time again, been a place that I can return, to release all the confusing emotions that I’m experiencing and practice what it looks like to nurture and care for the parts that are hurting.

Today I’m sharing a drawing I did a while back, where I pretty quickly was able to go through this process of identifying my emotions, expressing them, and getting to the root of what they had to tell me.

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To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

Hey Overcomer, this week I want to share with you a very special podcast interview I did with Michael Unbroken on the Think Unbroken Podcast. I’ve gotten so much out of Michael’s work, and it was such a privilege to appear on his show. In this interview, you’ll hear me share more of my backstory than I have anywhere else, and you’ll also learn more about some foundational principles behind art therapy. I know that Michael likes to go deep with his guests, so I didn’t hold anything back. I really hope you get a lot out of it.

And as always, if you’d like to check out my Redefined coaching app, join my free Facebook group, join my email list, or anything else, click the link below to find everything you need.

https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

“I long to let it go and I don't know how.”

Have you ever felt this way, Overcomer? Like there's something you long to move past, get over, or let go of....and you just can't seem to do it. It doesn't make sense. It's confusing. It feels like you're working against yourself, even though you don't want to be.

Not only have I been there in the past, but I honestly think it's an ongoing part of the human condition. It's something we have to constantly be aware of and address.

The good news....

I believe it does get easier once we are aware of this push-pull dynamic within ourselves, and once we've gotten some practice addressing it.

But you've gotta be willing to get honest with yourself.If you're fed up with feeling stuck, then today's episode is for you.

.

.

The narcissist isn’t in charge anymore. It’s your turn, Overcomer.

You’ll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today.

To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

Each one of us has so many different parts that make up who we are… our personality, past trauma, and other memorable moments that shape who we have become. And it’s normal for us to have certain parts of ourselves that we’re not as comfortable with. We may actively try to avoid those parts, or our subconscious mind may be pushing them down for us.

What’s more, as Overcomers of narcissistic abuse, we’ve been actively told by our abusers that certain aspects of our identity, our very sense of self, are wrong, bad, or ugly. That’s a lot for us to unpack as we begin to heal.

Today I’d like to share a drawing I did last year, where I really settled into this idea of embracing whatever parts of myself needed to speak.

To view the art image discussed in the episode on the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

"How do you work through confusion to find direction and clarity after leaving an abusive relationship with a narcissist? That’s a good question, right?It’s hard to know which way is up when you’re in survival mode, and then even as things start to calm down in life, we can get so stuck in indecisiveness that we’re not really moving forward.We’re living an 'ok' life…but are we growing? Are we progressing? Have we gone beyond just a feeling of basic safety into a place of actually being fulfilled and feeling secure in who we are?If you’re not sure how to answer those questions, or if you feel stuck in a place of just 'ok' right now, you’re really gonna get a lot out of today’s episode."

.

The narcissist isn’t in charge anymore. It’s your turn, Overcomer.

You’ll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today.

To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

These days, we’re all photographers, aren’t we? Armed with a smartphone, tablet, or basic little digital camera, we all have the ability to take some pretty awesome photos. Heck, even back when I had a flip phone, I found myself using the camera feature a lot. And even before that, disposable cameras were so easy to come by, I always had one on hand, to capture both the beautiful and silly moments of life.

Whether you consider yourself a photographer in any sense, or not, I invite you to listen in today as I share one of the ways I’ve found myself intuitively using my iPhone camera to explore my ever-evolving sense of Self.

. To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

Sometimes we come to a place in life where we realize that certain people or situations are not fulfilling us the way they used to. And sometimes, those people or situations are not only failing to give us what we need, but they are also draining and depleting us. Our energy is low, and we don’t have the time, space, or resources to fill ourselves back up as long as we stay in the same place.

I’ve been feeling this lately, in a few different areas of my life....

____________

Interested in being interviewed on the podcast? Reach out to me at jennifer@jenniferakramer.com

Here's the link to all the things:

https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

Who gets to decide who you are?

The natural answer might be, “Me, of course!”. But in reality, we often let others decide and define who we are. Our family members, spouses, teachers, friends, coworkers, employers, and especially…the abusive and narcissistic people in our lives.

Sometimes we get in the habit of trusting others’ definitions of our identities more than our own. And sometimes this happens automatically because we don’t really know who we are…or at least we think we don’t.

Feelings of self-doubt and lack of confidence are so common for Overcomers of narcissistic abuse to experience. The narcissist made it their job to instill this self-doubt in us, so that we would always follow their lead and look to them for guidance and answers. They trained us to question our own thoughts and opinions, which kept us trapped under their control.

So, understandably, we come out of these abusive relationships continuing to doubt ourselves, and feeling a lack of confidence in our ability to stand firm on our own.

But the good news is that we do not have to stay trapped there! YOU do not have to stay trapped in this insecure, weak place. You can and will build confidence in yourself and your ability to shine…in your ability to be yourself and stand firm in your choices and actions in YOUR life.

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, schedule a FREE 15-minute Coaching Call, order Jennifer's book, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

What does it mean to have strength?

Of course, one definition of “strong” refers to physical strength - “having the power to move heavy weights or perform other physically demanding tasks”, or “exerting great force.”

People also use the term “inner strength” when referencing an individual’s ability to overcome hardship and have resilience. Corresponding definitions for this type of “strong” could be - “not easily disturbed, upset, or affected” or perhaps “showing determination, self-control, and good judgment”.

Today’s mantra is: I AM STRONG.

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, schedule a FREE 15-minute Coaching Call, order Jennifer's book, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

On last week’s episode, we started exploring the concept of trust. I talked about how this is a very difficult exploration, and that’s why we’ve eased into it.

For those who have been in any kind of abusive relationship, trust has been broken. Trust has been severed. It has been torn up into tiny pieces and stomped on, burned, or buried.

We have possibly trusted others too readily in the past, and not trusted ourselves enough. Now we don’t know who to trust, and our identity was so enmeshed with the abuser that even though we want to trust ourselves again (our intuition, knowledge, skill), we are not sure how to get there from here.

Put simply – trust is hard. So. Hard. And it deserves our attention.

Today’s mantra is: I trust myself and I trust my inner voice.

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, schedule a FREE 15-minute Coaching Call, order Jennifer's book, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

Today, we are talking about TRUST. I believe that cultivating a sense of trust in ourselves, our Creator or higher power, and in others is a key part of getting us unstuck.

Similar to last week’s mantra (I am safe and I am protected), this week’s mantra has two parts:

I trust the process, and I trust my Creator’s voice within me.

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, schedule a FREE 15-minute Coaching Call, order Jennifer's book, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

The concept of “safety” is complex and multifaceted.

Once you’ve experienced trauma, your brain and body can stay hypervigilant and on guard, continually telling you the story that you are not safe.

Your brain wants you to stay alert and aware of the potential for future danger. This is your brain’s way of trying to keep you safe.

But, what happens when we stay in this mode, day after day, year after year, even once there is no imminent threat to our wellbeing? Or what if the unsafe situations that we do face, are not life threatening in nature?

The short answer is that it diminishes our quality of life, doesn’t it?

It can feel like our bodies are trapped in an endless loop of fear. It doesn’t FEEL like our bodies are trying to keep us safe…it feels horrendous. It feels like our body’s trauma response is keeping us stuck in the trauma.

This week on the Art That Overcomes podcast we are exploring the mantra:

I am safe and I am protected.

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, schedule a FREE 15-minute Coaching Call, order Jennifer's book, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

In the introduction to the second session of my coaching program, The Redefined Process, I say:

“In order to allow for change to enter our lives, I believe we need to create some emotional and mental space. Just as a room in our house can become cluttered with junk, our brains get cluttered too. We need to clear that stuff out! Consistently! We need to consciously create the mental and emotional space to connect with our minds, bodies, and spirits on a regular basis.”

We need to actually create space in our lives to allow for change to come in.

Today’s mantra is: I am creating space for change. Say it with me: I am creating space for change.

I want to ask you, Overcomer: How can you give yourself the space to really daydream and plan for how you want your life to be? For what changes you want to see? And how can you take action from here to truly clear out what needs to be eliminated in order to create those new things…that change?

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, schedule a FREE 15-minute Coaching Call, order Jennifer's book, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

After surviving narcissistic abuse, we tend to think we’re aware of our feelings, and that we’ve learned to express those feelings in a way that helps us.

However, reality can be quite the opposite. Sometimes we use our thinking brain to rationalize our way out of feeling, and often we haven’t even stopped to truly experience our emotions. They get shoved to the side, and we continually tell our brains and bodies emotions don’t matter. We begin to wonder why we’re exhausted, negative, impulsive, and easily pushed to anger.

Sound familiar?

How can you change this? What do you need to open yourself up to today?

As for me...I am open to the process.

I am open to healing, to the unknown, to exploring my emotions, to practicing showing up as myself, unapologetically. I am open to expressing myself through use of art materials, I am open to guidance from others… I am open to challenging myself to take action.

Say it with me: I am open to the process.

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, schedule a FREE 15-minute Coaching Call, order Jennifer's book, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

Are you being too hard on yourself? Are you beating yourself up over things that are in the past, or that weren’t even yours to take responsibility for in the first place?

After surviving narcissistic abuse, it can be difficult to focus on the positive. We can’t quite envision a better future. Or, we’re not willing to do the work to set those goals.

Our brains like patterns, and it’s easier to let ourselves stay stuck in the negative, rather than give ourselves permission to move forward.

Today’s recording is all about giving ourselves that permission to get back up and try again. Keep going… Keep setting goals… Keep doing the hard work to become the Future You that you choose.

Today you’ll hear me mention some mantras that I want you to consider:

I accept the choices I have made, and the situation I am in.

I forgive myself for past mistakes.

I have the power to shape the life I choose from this moment forward.

I am allowed to get back up and try again.

After listening to my expanded explanation of these mantras, I encourage you to choose one or two that resonate most, and say them to yourself (out loud!) in the mirror daily. Yes, it will feel weird at first. It will feel uncomfortable. But we’ve got to be willing to work through those emotions in order to take any meaningful action toward healing.

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, schedule a FREE 15-minute Coaching Call, order Jennifer's book, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

I often share that the number one key to healing from narcissistic abuse is to stop reading about narcissism. While it’s crucial in the beginning of our recovery to learn all the things we can about the trauma we’ve been through… to piece together what the heck just happened to us?... If we keep up with this constant information gathering long term, it only keeps us stuck. True growth and healing is found in turning our attention away from the abuser and shifting attention to ourselves instead. We have to reconnect with and redefine our identities apart from the abusive narcissist. This takes time, and most importantly…practice. It takes action!

If this resonates with you and you’re truly ready to shift out of this information gathering phase, with so much of your attention on the narcissist, then I invite you to check out my Redefined coaching app, which includes my signature program, the Redefined Process. It’s all about helping you connect with YOU. If you’re not quite sure if you’re ready for that yet, then I suggest you read my book, The Uncommon Guide to Healing from Narcissistic Abuse: How I Used Art to Break the Pattern and Redefine My Identity. It’s a short, easy read, where I share pieces of my own story, along with knowledge from my training as an art therapist, and practical art and writing exercises too. You can find the link to buy the book, as well as links to check out the Redefined app all at the link in the podcast description.

Today’s episode is a little different than usual. Instead of sharing about my artmaking practice, followed by an imagined message from your Future Self, I want to share a guided meditation with you. I wrote this with the intention of helping you connect with YOUR Future Self. I want you to spend these next few minutes focusing on YOU…not the narcissist.

---------------------------------Here's the link to all the things!

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Go here to view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, order "The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse", or to grab the Intro and Chapter 1 for free :)

Here’s a quote from my new book:

“The thing that felt risky. The thing that felt scary. The decision that some friends would have cautioned me not to make. That choice was a crucial turning point for the better. It wasn’t selfish or foolish. It was necessary.”

You can do hard things, Overcomer. Today we are talking about why you need to do hard things, and how to get started.

And I’ll give you an example of how a painting I’m working on right now has taught me this, too.

--------------------------------------------Here's the link to all the things!

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Go here to view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, order "The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse", or to grab the Intro and Chapter 1 for free :)

Today I’m answering a question from a member of my free Facebook group, Women Overcoming Narcissistic Abuse.

The question is:

How do you overcome the insecurities they leave you with? I know loving yourself is key, but will I ever have that confidence again?

I thought this was a great question because this feeling of insecurity and lack of confidence is so common to us as Survivors or Overcomers of narcissistic abuse. This is a multi-faceted question, and I have four different thoughts or topics to address it, but really they are all very related to one another.

I’ll think you’ll find this super practical and helpful!

Here's the link to all the things!

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Go here to view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, order "The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse", or to grab the Intro and Chapter 1 for free :)

Do you have trouble envisioning goals for your life? Or trouble believing that you can actually reach the goals you’ve set? Or, did you think you had gotten it down, only to find that you’re now at a standstill, not really taking purposeful action toward where you want to go?

No matter where you might fall on this spectrum, I want to tell you that it makes sense. Lots of humans struggle with this, but especially Survivors and Overcomers of narcissistic abuse.

We have trouble moving past survival mode, making choices and decisions for ourselves, and taking action because it feels safer for us to stay small. Once upon a time, staying small is what kept us safe in the abusive relationship.

But now it’s holding us back.

Here's the link to all the things!

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Go here to view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, order "The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse", or to grab the Intro and Chapter 1 for free :)

Who gets to decide what real art is…and who the real artists are? And if a piece of artwork is good or not?

Do you have to exhibit artwork for others to see? Do you have to perform on a stage or on video?

Today I’m sharing my two cents on this topic.

Here's the link to all the things!

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Go here to view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, order "The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse", or to grab the Intro and Chapter 1 for free :)

I’m not a big fan of New Year’s resolutions. I find that this concept encourages us to set huge unrealistic goals that we pretty quickly fail to take action on.

It encourages an all or nothing mentality. We try to tackle the big goal, don’t reach it quickly, and then stop trying… and then feel guilty or disappointed in ourselves.

Listen, I think it’s great to set goals. But when we’re talking about one big thing to focus on for an entire calendar year, I prefer to simply name one intention word for the year.

This approach is definitely not unique to me. I’ve heard lots of others talk about this online the past few years.

Why?

Because it’s more effective than New Year’s resolutions. It gives you one broad theme to focus on throughout the year, as you continually recalculate, recalibrate, and set one goal after another as needed.

Here's the link to all the things!

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Go here to view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, order "The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse", or to grab the Intro and Chapter 1 for free :)

Anger. This is stereotypically a difficult emotion for women to allow themselves to feel and to express. We are taught that it’s acceptable for us to be sad, nervous, anxious, scared, disappointed, depressed…. Any of the “negative” emotions that make us small and shrink back, needy of others to comfort or save us.

But anger is an emotion that’s usually expressed more outwardly, in a way that commands the stage, if you will. Anger is powerful, energetic, and demands attention. When we think of how one would show this emotion to others, we usually think of an angry scowl with eyebrows downturned, and a loud voice, slamming doors, or even hitting or throwing things.

Did your abusive partner show their anger this way? Did they try to disguise their verbal and physical abuse under a mask of justifiable anger? Did their anger (even if just displayed in a facial expression) cause you to feel fear?

Today I’m answering a question from my online community about how to learn to be okay with our own anger, as well as the anger of others.

Here's the link to all the things!

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Go here to view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, order "The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse", or to grab the Intro and Chapter 1 for free :)

Are you able to be yourself, Overcomer?

Do you truly feel like you can let loose and be YOU, even if just for a little while, or in certain environments, or around certain people?

One of my biggest goals in life is to become more and more comfortable being ME in all places, spaces, and relationships.

I find that some of this increased comfortability with being Me comes naturally with age, but it also takes intentional work...

Here's the link to all the things!

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Go here to view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, order "The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse", or to grab the Intro and Chapter 1 for free :)

I often talk about the concept of “anniversary reactions” with my clients. This term refers to the yearly anniversary of a traumatic event or loss of some kind, and with it, the return of symptoms of grief.

A quick Google search told me that according to psychological literature, an “anniversary reaction” is defined as an individual’s response to unresolved grief resulting from significant losses. The anniversary reaction can involve several days or even weeks of anxiety, anger, nightmares, flashbacks, depression, or fear.

I have a few of my own anniversary reactions, and with time I have found that while it’s not helpful to assume that I’ll automatically struggle certain times of year, it is very helpful to be aware that these struggles may come. I make sure that on those days (or those months) I give myself a little extra space to feel whatever emotions may come up.

Can you relate? Do you experience increased symptoms of depression, anxiety, or anger during the time of year that your abusive relationship ended, when a specific traumatic event happened, or when a friend or family member died?

Today I’m sharing a bit about how I’m processing a current anniversary reaction of my own.

Here's the link to all the things!

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Go here to view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, order "The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse", or to grab the Intro and Chapter 1 for free :)

TODAY IS THE DAY!

Now is the time to order your copy of The Uncommon Guide to Healing from Narcissistic Abuse: How I Used Art to Break the Pattern and Redefine My Identity!

Are you a woman who has survived narcissistic abuse, gone to therapy, attended support groups, tried countless healing modalities — yet you still feel stuck in life?

The Uncommon Guide to Healing from Narcissistic Abuse: How I Used Art to Break the Pattern and Redefine My Identity hones in on the root issue behind your struggle to keep growing now that the initial relief of leaving the abuse has worn off.

In this book, Jennifer shares personal stories and reflections, mindset shifts, and practical exercises that will help you finally get unstuck, take charge of your life, and redefine your identity on your own terms. The narcissist isn’t in charge anymore! It’s your turn now.

Here's the link to all the things!

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Go here to view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, order "The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse", or to grab the Intro and Chapter 1 for free :)

I am so excited to announce that the Kindle E-book version of ‘The Uncommon Guide to Healing from Narcissistic Abuse: How I Used Art to Break the Pattern and Redefine My Identity’, is now live on Amazon! That means if you pre-ordered the Kindle E-book it should have been magically delivered to your device a few days ago, by the power of technology.

AND, I’m even more excited that TOMORROW, FRIDAY November 17th, the paperback version of ‘The Uncommon Guide to Healing from Narcissistic Abuse’ will finally be available for purchase!

I can’t wait for you to start reading it, completing the art and writing exercises at the end of each chapter, and experiencing some big aha moments.

Will you order either the e-book or paperback this week? Or better yet, order one for yourself, and one for a friend? I’m working really hard to see if I can get to a number one ranking in one of my chosen categories on Amazon. So far, my lowest ranking has been number 48 in the self help for abuse category.

Just like pretty much everything we experience online, Amazon has its own algorithm. The more orders I get (especially on the same day or within a few days), the better my ranking, and also the more I’ll gain visibility in the Amazon algorithm when other Overcomers like you log on to search for books about healing from narcissistic abuse. More popular books are going to show up first in someone’s search.

So, let’s make The Uncommon Guide to Healing from Narcissistic Abuse POPULAR, shall we? It’s all up to you!

Here's the link to all the things!

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Go here to view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, order "The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse", or to grab the Intro and Chapter 1 for free :)

I am so excited to announce that the Kindle E-book version of The Uncommon Guide to Healing from Narcissistic Abuse: How I Used Art to Break the Pattern and Redefine My Identity, is now live on Amazon! That means if you pre-ordered the Kindle E-book it should have been magically delivered to your device today, by the power of technology. I can’t wait for you to start reading it, completing the art and writing exercises at the end of each chapter, and experiencing some big aha moments.

If you’ve been paying close attention to all my posts and emails the past couple of weeks, you know that I was also planning for the paperback version of the book to be released today. Unfortunately, due to a small error on my part, the paperback will now be available this FRIDAY, November 17th. So…Just a few more days to wait!

Today, I want to read for you the introduction to the book. If you’d like to read this introduction for free, go to the link below to grab both the intro and first chapter. Or of course you can order the e-book and have the whole thing right now.

I want to read the introduction to you today…. And then later this week I’ll be popping back in to share one of my favorite passages from the book…. But I’ll keep that a secret for now.

Here's the link to all the things!

⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠⁠

Go here to view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, pre-order "The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse" (release date 11/13/23!!), or to grab the Intro and Chapter 1 for free :)

I love the idea of creating a vision board to help envision our goals for the future, but as I shared back in episode 63, I also have some mixed feelings about vision boards.

In that episode, I declared that I was going to make a more gritty type of vision board to accompany the one I had created sometime last year.

And, I did just that. Today I’m here to report how that went. It wasn’t what I expected, LOL. But I got a lot out of it.

Here's the link to all the things!

⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠⁠

Go here to view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, pre-order "The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse" (release date 11/13/23!!), or to grab the Intro and Chapter 1 for free :)

We tend to face the most internal resistance when it comes to the very activities that are going to help us most in our healing.

This is a subconscious way that our brains try to self-sabotage our healing, because on some level it feels safer to stay stuck in the place we are now. The unknown is scary, and as a survival mechanism, our brains want to protect us and keep us planted in our familiar habits, emotions, behaviors, and ways of reacting to stress. .

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Here's the link to all the things!

⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠⁠

Go here to view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, pre-order "The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse", or to grab the Intro and Chapter 1 for free :)

In some ways, I’m a very consistent person. I like to have a basic routine, I’m loyal to those who are close to me, and I think I’m pretty dependable. But in other ways, I struggle with consistency. Namely, when it comes to daily or weekly practices that help me take care of myself. Self-care. It’s a struggle. I’m guessing you can relate to this.

Most humans find it hard, at least in certain seasons of their life, to prioritize themselves in ways that matter. We’re not talking about hitting the snooze button so you can get a few extra ZZZ’s, or neglecting household chores and important relationships so you can watch Netflix in the name of self-care.

I’m talking about the things that are really going to move the needle forward for you…

Real, quality sleep. Daily journaling. Prayer. Meditation. Daily movement. Spiritual practices. Spending quality time with loved ones. Going to therapy. Creating art. Spending time in nature. Reading a personal development book. Stopping to stretch and breathe in the middle of your work day.

I think that getting into a routine of consistent self-care can be especially difficult for Overcomers of narcissistic abuse. This is because the abusive individuals in our lives have literally trained us to put ourselves last. As strange as it may seem to explain to someone who doesn’t understand this type of abuse, it actually feels very odd, uncomfortable, and even unsafe to prioritize ourselves.

So, how do we get over this? How do we improve the consistency and quality of our self-care routines?

There’s no easy answer, but it is simple. Just start doing something. And if it works for you, keep doing it. Today I’m sharing one self-care practice that I did really successfully for a long time, then fell off a bit, and I’ll explain where I am with it now.

Here's the link to all the things!

⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

Go here to view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, pre-order "The Uncommon Guide to Healing From Narcissistic Abuse", or to grab the Intro and Chapter 1 for free :)

Yesterday was my birthday! I turned 43, and I couldn’t be happier with where my life is heading. No, everything isn’t perfect (far from it!) and I haven’t even achieved all that I wanted to this year. I’ve had many setbacks and surprises. But I’ve also experienced so much goodness, and I’m able to see how even the perceived setbacks are actually working for me in really big ways.

One of the massive goals that I have accomplished is writing a book! You may have heard me mention this on a previous podcast episode or seen it on social media or in an email. Today I’m going to let you know all about how you can get your hands on a copy of The Uncommon Guide to Healing from Narcissistic Abuse: How I Used Art to Break the Pattern and Redefine My Identity. And, I want to share with you what this journey of tackling such a big new project has been like for me, and 3 important lessons I’ve learned along the way.

My hope is that you can apply these lessons to whatever big project, challenge, or goal that YOU are facing right now.

When you’re in survival mode right after leaving an abusive relationship, your priorities are clear. Safety. Stability. And that’s about it.

But after a while, that isn’t enough to keep us going. It’s important to consistently stop and assess our priorities at each stage of life.

Today I’m going to give you a practical exercise to help you stop and reflect on what your life is telling you that it needs more of…. Let’s assess what your body, mind, heart, and spirit need in this particular season of healing.

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, or grab the Introduction and Chapter 1 of Jennifer's new book for FREE, go here: ⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

There’s a question that I hear a lot in the personal development space: “Did it happen to you or did it happen for you?” It’s a question to ask yourself, intended to help you get out of a victim mindset and see the bigger picture. It’s intended to help us reframe the way we view our abuse, trauma, or other life struggles, and to help us look for the positives we can pull out of the experience. I encourage you to ask yourself, “Did the narcissistic abuse only happen TO me? Or is there something…anything… about my story of abuse that can be used to work FOR me? Is there anything I’ve learned from the experience? Am I now better able to relate to and help others who have suffered in similar ways?”

I want to be careful with how I approach this topic, Overcomer. Because, I never want to minimize your abuse or encourage you to simply look on the bright side and get over it. Rather, my intention with this episode is to help you find your power. I want to empower you to dig out some shred of good from a big heap of bad. We cannot go back and change the past, but we are in charge of how we choose to frame it, and what story we tell ourselves next.

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, or grab the Introduction and Chapter 1 of Jennifer's new book for FREE, go here: ⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

Have you ever created a “vision board”? Maybe it was something you did towards the end of the calendar year, in preparation for your New Year's resolution… sort of a visual representation of what you hoped to accomplish in the new year. Well, I have a love/hate relationship with new year's resolutions, and also with the concept of vision boards… no matter what time of year you create them.

On one hand, I absolutely love the idea of setting goals, getting specific about them, envisioning our Future Self, and feeling all the feelings of already having accomplished our goals. I think that choosing concrete images to create a visual representation of our goals and dreams is impactful because it helps us evoke those emotions, rather than just focusing on a task to complete. We really have to be able to get into that feeling state in order to believe it’s possible for us to reach the goal.

And, I just like making stuff! So vision boards can be fun.

But on the other hand, I think that vision boards can be limiting because if they ONLY keep us focused on a perfect, romanticized version of the future we envision for ourselves, then that goal is ultimately going to feel unrealistic and we may find ourselves frustrated on our journey to get to this goal that seems too perfect to actually be true.

So where’s the answer? Is there a happy medium here? A way to make vision boards really work for us? That’s what I want to explore today.

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To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, or grab the Introduction and Chapter 1 of Jennifer's new book for FREE, go here: ⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

Hey, Overcomer! Do you know what your top values are? For me, honesty and authenticity are definitely in my top five. I consider these two concepts to be one in the same. In my opinion, striving to live as authentically as possible, as true to yourself as possible, is a matter of honesty. Much of this comes naturally to me. I find it very hard to lie. I’m not saying I’ve never told a lie before, but it’s just not something that is generally very tempting for me to do, and it never has been. Living truthfully is important to me. Speaking my truth, telling my story, and sharing my opinion are important. Being unapologetically myself is important. I don’t like pretending to go along with something just to make others feel more comfortable, because that would feel inauthentic or dishonest to me. I’d rather speak my mind, gently when needed… and apologize later if I have to.

All that said, you’ll understand why it has been a surprise to me during my healing journey to discover that I have indeed been through phases where I wasn’t living as authentically as I thought I was. And even just recently, I had a big ‘aha’ moment around this topic.

You see, something I’ve started to contemplate is the way in which we choose to live authentically, or share our truth with others. As I just said, I’d rather speak my mind at all costs, even if it means apologizing later in instances where it comes across as harsh. But, I think I’m starting to discover a better way….an even truer way… to be authentically me.

The difference is that one way of being authentically “Me” screams: “This is who I am! Get used to it!”. And the other, newer way that I’ve gradually been shifting into for a while has more of a sense of quiet confidence and ease.

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, or grave the Introduction and Chapter 1 of Jennifer's new book for FREE, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

This week marks one full year since the Art That Overcomes podcast first aired! I can’t quite believe that every single week for the past year, I have posted an episode (and some weeks, even two episodes). I’ve just been putting one foot in front of the other, one committed action and then another committed action, until one day I woke up and realized I’d created 60 episodes.

I’m curious… are there things you’ve accomplished in life that you now look back on and think, “Wow, how did I get here? I actually did all that?”. Sometimes we don’t stop to give ourselves credit and celebrate our accomplishments because we may not even notice how far we’ve come. And that’s because anything we achieve in life is done so in small increments....small steps.

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Have you checked in with yourself today? Have you taken just a few moments to consider how you’re feeling, both physically and emotionally? Have you assessed if this is how you want to feel or not? And if you don’t like this state, how will you change it?

I’ve been processing a whole lot of emotions lately, and several weeks ago I found myself in a place of overwhelm. I stopped and caught myself in that feeling of anxiety and a general sense that everything was just TOO MUCH to handle. I took a few minutes to feel my feelings and process through it.

And of course, I did this using my art and responsive writing process. Today, as we return to our regularly structured episodes, after following a bit of a different format for the summer, I want to share with you some of the thoughts I’ve been having around the concept of what it means to be grounded.

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, schedule a FREE 15-minute Coaching Call, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

I’m an all or nothing kind of person. I don’t like in-betweens, transitions, or lack of control. I want to skip right past the messy middle and get to the good part.

Sound familiar?

So many of us loath the feeling that we are not finished healing. We get frustrated with the fact that we can understand where we want to be (or where we feel we need to be, or should be), but we just can’t get there yet.

Why?? Why can’t we just will ourselves into what we envision to be our final stage of healing… the place where we feel calm and confident and everything makes sense?

In today’s recording, I’m answering a question I’d received from a member of my Facebook group, Women Overcoming Narcissistic Abuse: How long does it take to recover from narcissistic abuse?

I think that the very nature of this question reflects that sense of uneasiness with being in the messy middle.

And I’ll tell you… even though I admit it’s still my default mode to be uncomfortable in this middle place of unfinished-ness… I have certainly learned to relax (to a certain extent) and embrace the journey, confident that as I keep showing up for myself and doing my healing work, I’ll end up where I need to be.

This journey looks a bit different for everyone, but no matter where you find yourself today, I think you’ll get something out of this conversation.

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, schedule a FREE 15-minute Coaching Call, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

As we talked about last week, sometimes as survivors of narcissistic abuse, we can be too hard on ourselves. We’ve been taught by our abusers to question our decisions, actions, and motives, while turning a blind eye to their problematic behaviors.

Two of the heaviest emotions that can linger on after leaving an abusive relationship are regret and guilt. We see the effects of the abuse in our lives, and regret our decision to stay in the relationship as long as we did, or the choice to raise children with the abuser, etc. And with that kind of regret tends to come the guilt… We simply cannot let go of the feeling that we have done something horribly wrong, and if we do try to let it go, it feels like we’re minimizing the entire experience or not owning our mistakes or weak moments. And even beyond that, our minds and bodies may be so used to holding onto that guilt that it has become the ever-present background noise to our lives… we walk around all day long with an underlying sense that we are in the wrong, just for existing.

In today’s recording, you’ll hear me share some thoughts and encouragements around this topic, along with a suggestion for how to begin to confront and process through feelings of regret and guilt.

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, schedule a FREE 15-minute Coaching Call, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

Are you being too hard on yourself? Are you beating yourself up over things that are in the past, or that weren’t even yours to take responsibility for in the first place?

After surviving narcissistic abuse, it can be difficult to focus on the positive. We can’t quite envision a better future. Or, we’re not willing to do the work to set those goals.

Our brains like patterns, and it’s easier to let ourselves stay stuck in the negative, rather than give ourselves permission to move forward.

Today’s recording is all about giving ourselves that permission to get back up and try again. Keep going… Keep setting goals… Keep doing the hard work to become the Future You that you choose.

Today you’ll hear me mention some mantras that I want you to consider:

I accept the choices I have made, and the situation I am in.

I forgive myself for past mistakes.

I have the power to shape the life I choose from this moment forward.

I am allowed to get back up and try again.

After listening to my expanded explanation of these mantras, I encourage you to choose one or two that resonate most, and say them to yourself (out loud!) in the mirror daily. Yes, it will feel weird at first. It will feel uncomfortable. But we’ve got to be willing to work through those emotions in order to take any meaningful action toward healing.

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, schedule a FREE 15-minute Coaching Call, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

I’ve got a bit of a controversial opinion on the topic of forgiveness, particularly when it comes to forgiving those who have abused us. I think forgiveness is important, but so often it’s a concept that’s shoved down our throats. We’re told we have to forgive. And if we don’t? We’re shamed (or we shame ourselves). I also think that we often confuse the word “forgiveness” with “reconciliation”. Those are two very different words, and should be handled separately.

What would happen if we loosened up a bit, and took the pressure off this topic? What if it really was your choice to forgive…or not. As survivors of narcissistic abuse, we’re not used to having choices. And, we are used to feeling shamed for things that we shouldn’t be.

On today’s recording, I share my thoughts on forgiveness, and why this is a more nuanced conversation than we tend to think.

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, schedule a FREE 15-minute Coaching Call, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

Soon after my abusive relationship ended, I began attending a support group that became my lifeline for quite a while. It was a co-ed group, and not centered on the topic of domestic violence, but I was relieved to find that among the attendees there were many women just like me. While we may have been different ages, come from different cultural traditions and socioeconomic backgrounds, and we had different personalities, hobbies, and interests… We had one huge thing in common (so much so that it often felt comical, even!). I heard women in that group share about conversations, thoughts, emotions, conflicts and confusion they’d felt in abusive relationships with narcissistic men, and I felt so seen.

Maybe you’ve had that experience with a friend, an online group, or even listening to this podcast. It’s an experience of having someone directly reflect your life right back to you, except that they don’t know you at all, and they’re actually describing their own relationship. And those other women felt this same phenomenon when I shared my story. We often found ourselves joking, “Did you have a camera in my house or something? How did you know that?” It can feel funny, comforting, and also so sad that narcissistic abuse can look so incredibly similar across different relationships. The reason I say it’s comforting is that when we hear others share, we know that we’re not alone. We’re not crazy, delusional, or stupid, as the narcissist tried to gaslight us into believing.

On today’s recording, I’m answering some very common questions that I often receive from my community of Overcomers. I’m guessing they’re things you’ve wondered about too.

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, schedule a FREE 15-minute Coaching Call, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

Trust. It’s one of the topics I hear about most from my clients. They can’t trust men. They can’t trust certain friends and family members anymore. They recognize they’ve been a little too quick to trust in the past… so now, they don’t even trust themselves.

Today’s recording is all about the juggling act of learning to trust ourselves and others, because in my personal experience, and in what I’ve seen in my clients, the two go hand in hand.

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, schedule a FREE 15-minute Coaching Call, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

Do you sometimes feel selfish, arrogant, or even question whether you’re the narcissist? Often I notice that Overcomers of narcissistic abuse are overly sensitive to the possibility that these traits are present within themselves, or in others.

Here’s an important reminder: There’s a huge difference between feeling confident, taking time to care for yourself for a change instead of overextending yourself for others, and being grounded in your own identity and choices…versus being self-absorbed, narcissistic, cruel, and abusive.

As I always say, the key to healing from narcissistic abuse is to reconnect with and redefine your own identity. You have to do the work of figuring out who YOU are. And, guess how you do that work? Through taking time for yourself. You need to explore activities you enjoy, spend time with people who help you feel validated and alive, and also simply take time to be quiet and reflect, making space for all of your thoughts and emotions to be heard.

You may have heard the phrase: “Self-care isn’t selfish”. I challenge you to really consider that as you listen to this episode. Today’s recording is all about why it can be so hard for us to practice self-care after experiencing narcissistic abuse.

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, schedule a FREE 15-minute Coaching Call, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

If you’ve been listening to me for any length of time, then you’ve heard me say that healing from narcissistic abuse is an endless journey. It can be our natural tendency to want to heal as quickly as possible. We want to hurry up and skip to the good part. But unlike a book where you can skip to the last chapter, or a movie where you can fast forward to the good part, our lives take time to unfold. The good news is that we have a lot of power in deciding how it unfolds, even if it feels like we’ve been powerless in the past. And, if we are constantly, endlessly engaged in life, consistently doing our healing work (whether that “work” means therapy, or spending a day outside just to be present and grounded, or making art just because it feels good…), then our potential for growth and healing is limitless.

On today’s recording, you’ll hear me respond to a specific question about how soon we can expect certain feelings to go away, or if they’ll ever go away at all. I’ll be addressing the feelings of hurt we have after narcissistic abuse, and the feeling of ongoing connection to the abuser that we sometimes feel.

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, schedule a FREE 15-minute Coaching Call, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

Hey there, Overcomer! This summer I’m sharing some previously recorded thoughts on a variety of topics related to healing from narcissistic abuse. I hope this content will resonate with you, and that with each episode you’ll really take the time to consider one action step you can take, based on the insight you’ve received.

If you need some help with that, I’d love to talk with you. Go to the link below to schedule a free 15 minute coaching session to talk about whatever you’d like. Yes, it’s free, no strings attached.

In this week's recording, I share my thoughts about why confidence is something we absolutely have to address in the early stages of our recovery from narcissistic abuse.

I’ll also walk you through a practical exercise to start building your confidence and silencing your limiting beliefs.

Self-doubt and low self-worth are hallmark symptoms of narcissistic abuse. The abuser manipulated and brainwashed you to think little of yourself and much of them.

It happened subtly, over time...and with intention.

So, rebuilding your confidence and learning to trust yourself will not happen overnight, and not unless you work for it.

As you listen, I want you to consider: What will you do today to build confidence in yourself and your abilities?

It's okay to celebrate yourself.

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, schedule a FREE 15-minute Coaching Call, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

When exploring unwanted emotions like fear, anger, and sadness, I find that my clients’ immediate reaction is that they actually don’t want to explore it at all. Sure, they might come to me voicing their concerns about these emotions…but therein lies the problem. They’re concerned about it, in the sense that they want it gone. They want to jump right to a place where that emotion no longer exists in their universe. Can you relate to that, Overcomer? The bad news is, that doesn't work. It simply isn’t possible. The good news? You CAN learn to ride the waves of uncomfortable emotions and come out okay on the other side.

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

Hey, Overcomer. I’m in a bit of a transition right now. I’m sure you know what that’s like. Our lives are full of transitions, some that feel good and some that feel bad. But even in the good ones, there can be lots of grief and other unwanted emotions that come up. Those feelings get all mixed together with the joy, relief, or optimism that we are experiencing as a part of the goodness.

Right now, I’m finding myself in a transition period that feels good overall, but quite honestly, I’m exhausted. And one thing that my heart is feeling extra drawn to in this season, is my practice of artmaking. This summer I’m easing into a new routine where I’m making more time for art…and, also more time to connect with you. Today I want to share about a series of three paintings I started recently, and I’ll also reflect on how important it is for me to continue sharing my artwork with you, and why you should be sharing your art with others too! I promise, it’s not as scary as it sounds…

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

Hey Overcomer, Today I’m sharing the audio from a live video I did in my Facebook group Women Overcoming Narcissistic Abuse, a couple of years ago. I had pushed record, in real time one Saturday morning, as I was having an aha moment about my tendency to procrastinate, stay stuck in anxiety, and subconsciously believe that I was not in control of my life. I hope this real life example is something you can relate to and get some insight from about your own life. There are so many lessons to be learned here! . To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

These days, we’re all photographers, aren’t we? Armed with a smartphone, tablet, or basic little digital camera, we all have the ability to take some pretty awesome photos. Heck, even back when I had a flip phone, I found myself using the camera feature a lot. And even before that, disposable cameras were so easy to come by, I always had one on hand, to capture both the beautiful and silly moments of life.

Whether you consider yourself a photographer in any sense, or not, I invite you to listen in today as I share one of the ways I’ve found myself intuitively using my iPhone camera to explore my ever-evolving sense of Self.

. To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

Whenever I find myself in the midst of an overwhelming trauma reaction…you know…the fight, flight, freeze, or fawn type of response… when I can tell that something deep within me has REALLY been triggered, it always comes back to my inner child. In those situations, there’s some aspect of the trigger that has brought my wounded childhood part to the forefront. I can usually tell this is what’s going on, by the type of behavior that results. Often, for me, I either shrink back and isolate out of insecurity and social anxiety, OR I go into full on fight mode and throw a tantrum…I have a big temper outburst where I feel compelled to yell and slam a door.

Over the years, my art and writing process has, time and time again, been a place that I can return, to release all the confusing emotions that I’m experiencing and practice what it looks like to nurture and care for the parts that are hurting.

Today I’m sharing a drawing I did a while back, where I pretty quickly was able to go through this process of identifying my emotions, expressing them, and getting to the root of what they had to tell me.

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To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

Hey Overcomer, today I want to share a really simple drawing exercise with you. It’s a way to discover and explore your individual color preferences, and a way for YOU to figure out what that means about your emotions, your personality, where you are on your healing journey, and where you need to go next. I realize the title of this episode might be a little misleading… making it sound like I am going to tell you what your color preferences say about you. And, I was intentional in wording it that way. You see, I think that most people, and especially those of us who have survived narcissistic abuse or other forms of abuse and trauma, would really love it if someone would just give us an answer. We long for someone else to take the reins and tell us the secret to fixing ourselves so that we don’t have to suffer anymore. I relate to those feelings so deeply, and I worded the title this way to attract those of you who are in this mindset. I understand that when we are thinking this way, deep down, we struggle with the concept of stepping up and doing the hard work to figure things out for ourselves. We so desperately want to heal, and we want it quick. But, the truth is…that’s now how this healing journey works. We have to put in the work, and we have to show up for ourselves. While it’s normal to slip into this passive, victim-mindset, we aren’t doing ourselves any favors by staying there. That said, I’m here with some tools to help you along the way, if you’re willing to implement them. This isn’t about doing all the hard work of healing on your own, but it IS about learning from others AND taking action from there.

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To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

I’ve found that some women like to move right on to dating new people after leaving an abusive relationship, some swear off relationships altogether (with no interest of dating at all), and others fall somewhere in between (choosing to wait a length of time before dating, but with the eventual goal of finding a healthy relationship down the road).

After leaving my abusive relationship, I definitely fell into the latter category. And, at this point, I’ve dated some, but am currently single. In this episode, I’m going to share the audio from a live video I did a couple of years ago, in my free Facebook group, Women Overcoming Narcissistic Abuse. The purpose of the video was to address the question: How soon is too soon to date after narcissistic abuse? This question came directly from my group members, and I’m guessing that many of you podcast listeners have wondered the same thing. So, I’m excited to be able to share my thoughts on this topic with you today.

To view the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

Each one of us has so many different parts that make up who we are… our personality, past trauma, and other memorable moments that shape who we have become. And it’s normal for us to have certain parts of ourselves that we’re not as comfortable with. We may actively try to avoid those parts, or our subconscious mind may be pushing them down for us.

What’s more, as Overcomers of narcissistic abuse, we’ve been actively told by our abusers that certain aspects of our identity, our very sense of self, are wrong, bad, or ugly. That’s a lot for us to unpack as we begin to heal.

Today I’d like to share a drawing I did last year, where I really settled into this idea of embracing whatever parts of myself needed to speak.

To view the art image discussed in the episode on the Art That Overcomes Instagram page, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

The strategic use of color has always been a central component of any form of visual art. And not just for the aesthetic value or visual effect that different colors and color combinations provide. Colors…in different shades, hues, levels of saturation, in different quantities, applied with different textures and gestures, and in different artistic styles… they can all be used to symbolize a variety of emotions, human experiences, and abstract concepts.

One of my favorite pieces of art that I’ve ever created is the series of tattoos that stream from my upper back, all the way down my arms. While I certainly didn’t put the tattoos on my body myself, and I didn’t even create all the drawings for them, my tattoo designs are as much a part of my collection of artistic work as any drawing or painting I’ve created on paper, canvas, or wood… And maybe even more so.

Today I’m sharing all about the journey of my series of tattoos, and how they are incredibly aligned with the way that I like to create art: always considering process over product. And as a part of that, I’ll be explaining why the strategic use of color has become so meaningful to this ever-evolving piece of art.

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To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

I’ve often said that within the creative process there is no impulse control required. By which I mean that as long as you’re being safe and not harming yourself or others, the creative artmaking process is one of the few places in life where you can truly be free, let loose, be yourself, and express what you need to express. All without judgment, expectations, or limitations. I believe this is true for any creative expression, whether visual art, writing, drama, dance and movement, or any form of play. And today, as I share the piece of art that first triggered me to think about this concept of “no impulse control required”, I’m going to talk about why I now take this one step further to say that poor impulse control is actually required in this creative, healing process.

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You’ll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today.

To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer⁠

Learning to use our voice, speak our truth, and honestly share our opinions and preferences isn’t something that comes easily for Overcomers of narcissistic abuse. We’ve been taught that our voice doesn’t matter, and then, even after the abuse ends, our brains tend to stay stuck in a subconscious pattern of making ourselves small. If learning to use your voice has been difficult as you’ve transitioned out of an abusive relationship, then you're going to want to listen to this.

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You’ll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today.

To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: ⁠https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

Today I'm sharing four quick insights that art has taught me about recovery from narcissistic abuse. While there are countless personal, individual lessons I’ve learned over the years of using art in my healing journey, there are also bigger, overarching themes. And I’m sharing four of them today!

As you listen to me list out the four things I’ve learned, I encourage you to reflect on which one sounds the most interesting to you.
Which one stands out? Maybe it’s one that you can relate to…you’ve learned that too!
Maybe it’s something you’ve heard me say before, and hearing it again today is a good reminder to really contemplate how it relates to your life…how you can integrate it into your own healing.

Or, maybe you’ll hear something that is a totally new concept for you, and peaks your interest in that way.
Choose whichever one stands out, and then decide what action you’re going to take from here. Because, healing doesn’t just come from listening…it requires action.
Then stay tuned to the end of the episode for a message from your future self!

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You’ll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today.

To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

Welcome, Overcomer! Today's episode is a special training that will give you a bit of my background, why what you're doing to recover from narcissistic abuse might not be working, and what to do instead. Specifically, I'll be explaining the top 3 things I've found that ultimately helped me get unstuck and build the confidence I was so desperately lacking after the abuse.

You'll also hear more about my group coaching program The Redefined Process, and how you can access it either through the Redefined Membership, or the VIP Redefined Membership. Here are the links mentioned in the show:

View art images mentioned in this episode

Information about the Redefined Membership

Information about the VIP Redefined Membership

Link to schedule a 15-minute info call

Welcome to this special series of the Art That Overcomes podcast to kick off the spring season! For me, this time of year symbolizes a spirit of newness and growth. Temperatures are gradually getting warmer, the sun is rising earlier and setting later, trees are budding, and flowers are starting to bloom. My invitation for you in this season is to bravely open yourself up to new thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. What might happen for you this spring?! What new experiences, relationships, and confidence will you find?! I promise, it’s all up to you.

In each episode of this series, we’ll be exploring one of the mantras from my coaching program, The Redefined Process. These mantras serve as a guide for each session in the program, accompanied by art and writing tasks that loosely fit their theme. We won’t be going into the details of those particular art tasks here on the podcast, but in the spirit of newness, I will be personally revisiting each theme and sharing some art and reflections along the way.

PLUS, I'll be sharing all about a new VIP Redefined Membership, coming soon!

You don't want to miss this.

To view art images discussed on the podcast, sign up for weekly emails, join the free Facebook group, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

To learn more about the VIP Redefined Membership, beginning April 16th, 2023, CLICK HERE.

View the live video from today's episode in the Women Overcoming Narcissistic abuse Facebook group.

Welcome to this special series of the Art That Overcomes podcast to kick off the spring season! For me, this time of year symbolizes a spirit of newness and growth. Temperatures are gradually getting warmer, the sun is rising earlier and setting later, trees are budding, and flowers are starting to bloom. My invitation for you in this season is to bravely open yourself up to new thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. What might happen for you this spring?! What new experiences, relationships, and confidence will you find?! I promise, it’s all up to you.

In each episode of this series, we’ll be exploring one of the mantras from my coaching program, The Redefined Process. These mantras serve as a guide for each session in the program, accompanied by art and writing tasks that loosely fit their theme. We won’t be going into the details of those particular art tasks here on the podcast, but in the spirit of newness, I will be personally revisiting each theme and sharing some art and reflections along the way.

PLUS, I'll be sharing all about a new VIP Redefined Membership, coming soon!

You don't want to miss this.

To view art images discussed on the podcast, sign up for weekly emails, join the free Facebook group, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

To learn more about the ⁠⁠VIP Redefined Membership, beginning April 16th, 2023, CLICK HERE.⁠⁠

View the live video from today's episode in the ⁠⁠Women Overcoming Narcissistic abuse Facebook group HERE.⁠⁠

Welcome to this special series of the Art That Overcomes podcast to kick off the spring season! For me, this time of year symbolizes a spirit of newness and growth. Temperatures are gradually getting warmer, the sun is rising earlier and setting later, trees are budding, and flowers are starting to bloom. My invitation for you in this season is to bravely open yourself up to new thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. What might happen for you this spring?! What new experiences, relationships, and confidence will you find?! I promise, it’s all up to you.

In each episode of this series, we’ll be exploring one of the mantras from my coaching program, The Redefined Process. These mantras serve as a guide for each session in the program, accompanied by art and writing tasks that loosely fit their theme. We won’t be going into the details of those particular art tasks here on the podcast, but in the spirit of newness, I will be personally revisiting each theme and sharing some art and reflections along the way.

PLUS, I'll be sharing all about a new VIP Redefined Membership, coming soon!

You don't want to miss this.

To view art images discussed on the podcast, sign up for weekly emails, join the free Facebook group, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

To learn more about the VIP Redefined Membership, beginning April 16th, 2023, go here: https://jennifer87f6e6.clickfunnels.com/optin1678467250007

Today's video unfortunately had very bad sound quality, but if you'd like to view it to get a visual of the process and how the artwork looked as I worked on it, go right ahead ;). View the live video from today's episode in the Women Overcoming Narcissistic abuse Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/jennifer.a.kramer.41/videos/930642091621138?idorvanity=602275530343306

Welcome to this special series of the Art That Overcomes podcast to kick off the spring season! For me, this time of year symbolizes a spirit of newness and growth. Temperatures are gradually getting warmer, the sun is rising earlier and setting later, trees are budding, and flowers are starting to bloom. My invitation for you in this season is to bravely open yourself up to new thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. What might happen for you this spring?! What new experiences, relationships, and confidence will you find?! I promise, it’s all up to you.

In each episode of this series, we’ll be exploring one of the mantras from my coaching program, The Redefined Process. These mantras serve as a guide for each session in the program, accompanied by art and writing tasks that loosely fit their theme. We won’t be going into the details of those particular art tasks here on the podcast, but in the spirit of newness, I will be personally revisiting each theme and sharing some art and reflections along the way.

PLUS, I'll be sharing all about a new VIP Redefined Membership, coming soon!

You don't want to miss this.

To view art images discussed on the podcast, sign up for weekly emails, join the free Facebook group, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

To learn more about the VIP Redefined Membership, beginning April 16th, 2023, go here: https://jennifer87f6e6.clickfunnels.com/optin1678467250007

View the live video from today's episode in the Women Overcoming Narcissistic abuse Facebook group:

https://www.facebook.com/jennifer.a.kramer.41/videos/136127769402208?idorvanity=602275530343306

Welcome to this special series of the Art That Overcomes podcast to kick off the spring season! For me, this time of year symbolizes a spirit of newness and growth. Temperatures are gradually getting warmer, the sun is rising earlier and setting later, trees are budding, and flowers are starting to bloom. My invitation for you in this season is to bravely open yourself up to new thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. What might happen for you this spring?! What new experiences, relationships, and confidence will you find?! I promise, it’s all up to you.

In each episode of this series, we’ll be exploring one of the mantras from my coaching program, The Redefined Process. These mantras serve as a guide for each session in the program, accompanied by art and writing tasks that loosely fit their theme. We won’t be going into the details of those particular art tasks here on the podcast, but in the spirit of newness, I will be personally revisiting each theme and sharing some art and reflections along the way.

PLUS, I'll be sharing all about a new VIP Redefined Membership, coming soon!

You don't want to miss this.

To view art images discussed on the podcast, sign up for weekly emails, join the free Facebook group, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

To learn more about the VIP Redefined Membership, beginning April 16th, 2023, go here: https://jennifer87f6e6.clickfunnels.com/optin1678467250007

Welcome to this special series of the Art That Overcomes podcast to kick off the spring season! For me, this time of year symbolizes a spirit of newness and growth. Temperatures are gradually getting warmer, the sun is rising earlier and setting later, trees are budding, and flowers are starting to bloom. My invitation for you in this season is to bravely open yourself up to new thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. What might happen for you this spring?! What new experiences, relationships, and confidence will you find?! I promise, it’s all up to you.

In each episode of this series, we’ll be exploring one of the mantras from my coaching program, The Redefined Process. These mantras serve as a guide for each session in the program, accompanied by art and writing tasks that loosely fit their theme. We won’t be going into the details of those particular art tasks here on the podcast, but in the spirit of newness, I will be personally revisiting each theme and sharing some art and reflections along the way.

PLUS, I'll be sharing all about a new VIP Redefined Membership, coming soon!

You don't want to miss this.

To view art images discussed on the podcast, sign up for weekly emails, join the free Facebook group, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

Welcome to this special series of the Art That Overcomes podcast to kick off the spring season! For me, this time of year symbolizes a spirit of newness and growth. Temperatures are gradually getting warmer, the sun is rising earlier and setting later, trees are budding, and flowers are starting to bloom. My invitation for you in this season is to bravely open yourself up to new thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. What might happen for you this spring?! What new experiences, relationships, and confidence will you find?! I promise, it’s all up to you.

In each episode of this series, we’ll be exploring one of the mantras from my coaching program, The Redefined Process. These mantras serve as a guide for each session in the program, accompanied by art and writing tasks that loosely fit their theme. We won’t be going into the details of those particular art tasks here on the podcast, but in the spirit of newness, I will be personally revisiting each theme and sharing some art and reflections along the way.

PLUS, I'll be sharing all about a new VIP Redefined Membership, coming soon!

You don't want to miss this.

To view art images discussed on the podcast, sign up for weekly emails, join the free Facebook group, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

View the Live video from this episode: https://www.facebook.com/jennifer.a.kramer.41/videos/750236736549815?idorvanity=602275530343306

Welcome to this special series of the Art That Overcomes podcast to kick off the spring season! For me, this time of year symbolizes a spirit of newness and growth. Temperatures are gradually getting warmer, the sun is rising earlier and setting later, trees are budding, and flowers are starting to bloom. My invitation for you in this season is to bravely open yourself up to new thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. What might happen for you this spring?! What new experiences, relationships, and confidence will you find?! I promise, it’s all up to you.

In each episode of this series, we’ll be exploring one of the mantras from my coaching program, The Redefined Process. These mantras serve as a guide for each session in the program, accompanied by art and writing tasks that loosely fit their theme. We won’t be going into the details of those particular art tasks here on the podcast, but in the spirit of newness, I will be personally revisiting each theme and sharing some art and reflections along the way.

PLUS, I'll be sharing all about a new VIP Redefined Membership, coming soon!

You don't want to miss this.

To view art images discussed on the podcast, sign up for weekly emails, join the free Facebook group, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

View the live video from this episode: https://www.facebook.com/jennifer.a.kramer.41/videos/942028650503366?idorvanity=602275530343306

Next Wednesday, we'll be starting a special series of the Art That Overcomes podcast to kick off the spring season! For me, this time of year symbolizes a spirit of newness and growth. Temperatures are gradually getting warmer, the sun is rising earlier and setting later, trees are budding, and flowers are starting to bloom. My invitation for you in this season is to bravely open yourself up to new thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. What might happen for you this spring?! What new experiences, relationships, and confidence will you find?! I promise, it’s all up to you.

In each episode of this series, we’ll be exploring one of the mantras from my coaching program, The Redefined Process. These mantras serve as a guide for each session in the program, accompanied by art and writing tasks that loosely fit their theme. We won’t be going into the details of those particular art tasks here on the podcast, but in the spirit of newness, I will be personally revisiting each theme and sharing some art and reflections along the way.

PLUS, I'll be sharing all about a new VIP Redefined Membership, coming soon!

You don't want to miss this.

To view art images discussed on the podcast, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

Codependency. This is no doubt a word you’ve heard a lot during your recovery from narcissistic abuse, especially if you’re in therapy or coaching of any kind. And we can have a lot of different reactions to this word. Some view codependent traits as extremely toxic, some don’t like this term at all and claim we’re all codependent in one way or another, and some people, like me, feel that the answer is somewhere in between those two extremes. What I’ve discovered in my own healing, is that becoming aware of and growing out of my codependent feelings and behaviors in relationships is a very gradual process. It requires that I extend patience, grace, love, and acceptance to myself, over and over again as I continue to grow. And there are certainly lots of growing pains along the way. But, I believe it’s totally worth it to trudge through all of the difficulties in order to become more strongly rooted in my own identity, a firm foundation from which to attract others into my life who are also rooted in who they are.

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You’ll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today.

To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

For so many survivors, trauma symptoms linger on for months, years, and even decades after the relationship has ended. My advice today might challenge you, but I promise it is the single most important step I took to move me toward healing. It’s not a popular opinion. It’s not what the most successful narcissistic abuse coaches are teaching. It may be hard for you to hear. And that’s okay. My approach isn’t for everyone, but I’d argue that’s because we’re all at different places in our journey, and my number one tip isn’t for those who are fresh out of the abuse. But if you’ve been free for a while now, you’re going to therapy, attending support groups, starting new hobbies, trying to get a handle on finances, and relationships….and, you still feel anxious and hypervigilant, struggling to trust others and truly feel free… then this tip may be the the catalyst for the shift you’ve been waiting for.

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Read the blog article on Elephant Journal: Breaking the Pattern: Why We Need to Stop Reading About Narcissism

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You’ll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today.

To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

Hey, Overcomer. I want to do a couple of things on today’s episode. First, I want to take some time to sum up my final thoughts related to the artwork I shared in the previous two episodes, about, ‘What does it mean to be a work in progress?’. Since I was sharing the artwork in real time, there was a lot for me to process, and I’ve since realized there are some final insights that I haven’t communicated yet. So, we’ll do that… Then I want to share with you a blog article that I wrote right around this time last year. It’s called, “‘Our Potential for Growth is Limitless’ – 3 Ways to Redefine Ourselves After Abuse”. I’m really proud of this article, which was published on Elephantjournal.com, and I think the topic ties in nicely with what we’ve been discussing here.

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Read the blog article on Elephant Journal: 'Our Potential for Growth is Limitless' - 3 Ways to Redefine Ourselves After Abuse

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You’ll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today.

To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

As promised, I’m back with part two of 'What does it mean to be a work in progress?'. Last week I shared about the feeling of discomfort around receiving positive attention (even though deep down, that’s exactly what I want from others), and ended up uncovering feelings of being scared and trapped and disconnected from my sense of self. I’d pulled out two old self portraits from nearly 20 years ago, and attempted to create a present day version of them. I started my artmaking time last week, thinking that I’d end feeling more connected to my identity, but found there was too much to unpack in one day. I allowed myself to feel what came up, and continued to think and process through what was continuing to come up for me throughout the week. Then, last Thursday it hit me like a ton of bricks. I tapped into and honed in on an emotion that I hadn’t felt during my artmaking, and knew it was exactly what I needed to explore with my art the following day. This really is a process, Overcomer.

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You’ll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today.

To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

I’ve got these two pen and ink self portraits that I drew soon after I graduated college, around the fall of 2004. I was feeling very lost in life, not sure what to do next. Maybe you’ve been in a similar situation…I had spent the previous 17 or 18 years as a student. My identity was very much wrapped up in that role. So, now that I’d graduated and didn’t have a firm career plan laid out (or, let’s be honest, I had exactly zero career plans), who was I? Where was my place in the world?...

Those portraits I did of that young version of Jennifer…I pulled them out the other day, and then attempted to create a present-day version. And that’s what I want to share with you today.

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You’ll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today.

To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

Have you ever read the children’s book, Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day? I love this book because I think all of us can relate to Alexander. It seems that nothing is going right for him, and he can only see his circumstances through a negative lens, where he’s the victim to everyone and everything. He repeatedly tells his friends, family, and teachers that he’s having a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day, and he thinks he’ll move to Australia. I guess he figures that’s far enough away that none of his problems will follow him there. Then, at the very end of his day, he tell us, “My mother says some days are like that, even in Australia.”

Today, I am not exactly having an Alexander type of day, but I am feeling really down. I honestly feel depressed. And I want to share with you how I’m processing those emotions…and it does not involve moving to the other side of the world.

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You’ll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today.

To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

*"How do you work through confusion to find direction and clarity after leaving an abusive relationship with a narcissist? That’s a good question, right?

It’s hard to know which way is up when you’re in survival mode, and then even as things start to calm down in life, we can get so stuck in indecisiveness that we’re not really moving forward.

We’re living an 'ok' life…but are we growing? Are we progressing? Have we gone beyond just a feeling of basic safety into a place of actually being fulfilled and feeling secure in who we are?

If you’re not sure how to answer those questions, or if you feel stuck in a place of just 'ok' right now, you’re really gonna get a lot out of today’s episode."*

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The narcissist isn’t in charge anymore. It’s your turn, Overcomer.

You’ll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today.

To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

"Something I love about being an artist and writer is that the work I create continues to exist long after I create it (whether in digital or physical form) and I can access it and reflect on it weeks, months, and years later. In this sense, it kind of has a life all its own. As I said…it exists. It is its own thing. I’ve supplied the thoughts, words, colors, emotions, and actions to make it come to life. I’ve taken the thoughts, words, colors, emotions and actions out of my body and brain and put them onto another surface, or into my computer hard drive or Google doc. Then…I let them exist…and, I choose when and how I interact with them."

The narcissist isn’t in charge anymore. It’s your turn, Overcomer.

You’ll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today.

To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

I know that this holiday season may be hard for you. From reminders of past traumas, to navigating difficult schedules with co-parents, to putting on a fake happy face for family and friends… the holiday season is anything but merry and bright for so many Overcomers of narcissistic abuse.

I can relate.

That’s why I’m bringing you a very intentional series of podcast episodes to help support you through this time of year. I’ll be posting short episodes every Wednesday AND Saturday, from December 7th through January 7th. Then we’ll regroup and get back to the regular format for the new year.

As hard as this season may be for you, it can also be a time of immense growth if you’re willing to take a breath and reflect...if you’re willing to do a little work to connect with all that is good inside of you. And I’m here to help with that.

Click the link to learn more about my Redefined coaching app, and so much more: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

Go directly to the Redefined website: https://redefined-by-jenniferkramer.passion.io/

I know that this holiday season may be hard for you. From reminders of past traumas, to navigating difficult schedules with co-parents, to putting on a fake happy face for family and friends… the holiday season is anything but merry and bright for so many Overcomers of narcissistic abuse.

I can relate.

That’s why I’m bringing you a very intentional series of podcast episodes to help support you through this time of year. I’ll be posting short episodes every Wednesday AND Saturday, from December 7th through January 7th. Then we’ll regroup and get back to the regular format for the new year.

As hard as this season may be for you, it can also be a time of immense growth if you’re willing to take a breath and reflect...if you’re willing to do a little work to connect with all that is good inside of you. And I’m here to help with that.

Click the link to learn more about my Redefined coaching app, and so much more: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

I know that this holiday season may be hard for you. From reminders of past traumas, to navigating difficult schedules with co-parents, to putting on a fake happy face for family and friends… the holiday season is anything but merry and bright for so many Overcomers of narcissistic abuse.

I can relate.

That’s why I’m bringing you a very intentional series of podcast episodes to help support you through this time of year. I’ll be posting short episodes every Wednesday AND Saturday, from December 7th through January 7th. Then we’ll regroup and get back to the regular format for the new year.

As hard as this season may be for you, it can also be a time of immense growth if you’re willing to take a breath and reflect...if you’re willing to do a little work to connect with all that is good inside of you. And I’m here to help with that.

Click the link to learn more about my Redefined coaching app, and so much more: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

I know that this holiday season may be hard for you. From reminders of past traumas, to navigating difficult schedules with co-parents, to putting on a fake happy face for family and friends… the holiday season is anything but merry and bright for so many Overcomers of narcissistic abuse.

I can relate.

That’s why I’m bringing you a very intentional series of podcast episodes to help support you through this time of year. I’ll be posting short episodes every Wednesday AND Saturday, from December 7th through January 7th. Then we’ll regroup and get back to the regular format for the new year.

As hard as this season may be for you, it can also be a time of immense growth if you’re willing to take a breath and reflect...if you’re willing to do a little work to connect with all that is good inside of you. And I’m here to help with that.

Click the link to learn more about my Redefined coaching app, and so much more: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

I know that this holiday season may be hard for you. From reminders of past traumas, to navigating difficult schedules with co-parents, to putting on a fake happy face for family and friends… the holiday season is anything but merry and bright for so many Overcomers of narcissistic abuse.

I can relate.

That’s why I’m bringing you a very intentional series of podcast episodes to help support you through this time of year. I’ll be posting short episodes every Wednesday AND Saturday, from December 7th through January 7th. Then we’ll regroup and get back to the regular format for the new year.

As hard as this season may be for you, it can also be a time of immense growth if you’re willing to take a breath and reflect...if you’re willing to do a little work to connect with all that is good inside of you. And I’m here to help with that.

Click the link to learn more about my Redefined coaching app, and so much more: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

I know that this holiday season may be hard for you. From reminders of past traumas, to navigating difficult schedules with co-parents, to putting on a fake happy face for family and friends… the holiday season is anything but merry and bright for so many Overcomers of narcissistic abuse.

I can relate.

That’s why I’m bringing you a very intentional series of podcast episodes to help support you through this time of year. I’ll be posting short episodes every Wednesday AND Saturday, from December 7th through January 7th. Then we’ll regroup and get back to the regular format for the new year.

As hard as this season may be for you, it can also be a time of immense growth if you’re willing to take a breath and reflect...if you’re willing to do a little work to connect with all that is good inside of you. And I’m here to help with that.

Click the link to learn more about my Redefined coaching app, and so much more: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

I know that this holiday season may be hard for you. From reminders of past traumas, to navigating difficult schedules with co-parents, to putting on a fake happy face for family and friends… the holiday season is anything but merry and bright for so many Overcomers of narcissistic abuse.

I can relate.

That’s why I’m bringing you a very intentional series of podcast episodes to help support you through this time of year. I’ll be posting short episodes every Wednesday AND Saturday, from December 7th through January 7th. Then we’ll regroup and get back to the regular format for the new year.

As hard as this season may be for you, it can also be a time of immense growth if you’re willing to take a breath and reflect...if you’re willing to do a little work to connect with all that is good inside of you. And I’m here to help with that.

Click the link to learn more about my Redefined coaching app, and so much more: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

I know that this holiday season may be hard for you. From reminders of past traumas, to navigating difficult schedules with co-parents, to putting on a fake happy face for family and friends… the holiday season is anything but merry and bright for so many Overcomers of narcissistic abuse.

I can relate.

That’s why I’m bringing you a very intentional series of podcast episodes to help support you through this time of year. I’ll be posting short episodes every Wednesday AND Saturday, from December 7th through January 7th. Then we’ll regroup and get back to the regular format for the new year.

As hard as this season may be for you, it can also be a time of immense growth if you’re willing to take a breath and reflect...if you’re willing to do a little work to connect with all that is good inside of you. And I’m here to help with that.

Click the link to learn more about my Redefined coaching app, and so much more: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

I know that this holiday season may be hard for you. From reminders of past traumas, to navigating difficult schedules with co-parents, to putting on a fake happy face for family and friends… the holiday season is anything but merry and bright for so many Overcomers of narcissistic abuse.

I can relate.

That’s why I’m bringing you a very intentional series of podcast episodes to help support you through this time of year. I’ll be posting short episodes every Wednesday AND Saturday, from December 7th through January 7th. Then we’ll regroup and get back to the regular format for the new year.

As hard as this season may be for you, it can also be a time of immense growth if you’re willing to take a breath and reflect...if you’re willing to do a little work to connect with all that is good inside of you. And I’m here to help with that.

Click the link to learn more about my Redefined coaching app, and so much more: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

I know that this holiday season may be hard for you. From reminders of past traumas, to navigating difficult schedules with co-parents, to putting on a fake happy face for family and friends… the holiday season is anything but merry and bright for so many Overcomers of narcissistic abuse.

I can relate.

That’s why I’m bringing you a very intentional series of podcast episodes to help support you through this time of year. I’ll be posting short episodes every Wednesday AND Saturday, from December 7th through January 7th. Then we’ll regroup and get back to the regular format for the new year.

As hard as this season may be for you, it can also be a time of immense growth if you’re willing to take a breath and reflect...if you’re willing to do a little work to connect with all that is good inside of you. And I’m here to help with that.

Click the link to learn more about my Redefined coaching app, and so much more: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

“....It is the opening of the up and out of here, [out] of being bogged down, down into the dumps, into the depths. Depths of despair and uncertainty and un-reality of caring. Caring for my wound. His wound”

Narcissists don’t know how to truly engage with us emotionally, and that means sexual interactions with them are empty and abusive as well.

Emotional intimacy feels threatening to a narcissist, because it requires vulnerability, transparency, and trust. They can’t present themselves as perfect and in charge when they’re so intimately engaged…so they’ll avoid it at all costs.

And, in turn, sexual interactions with a narcissist are not emotionally intimate. Some narcissists may appear distant, like their mind is in another place, they’re especially short-tempered and judgmental when it comes to physical intimacy, or they avoid it altogether…coming up with excuses not to devote energy to this part of your relationship.

On the other hand, maybe you've experienced a narcissist who seemed hyper focused on sexual interactions with you. This might feel fun at first, but becomes demanding and objectifying, and again…devoid of true emotional connection.

At its worst, sexual interaction with a narcissist can become more overtly abusive…with rape and other forms of sexual assault not uncommon.

All this said, I think it’s very normal for survivors of narcissistic abuse to have a tremendous amount of emotions to unpack around their sexuality, femininity, and how to relate to men in various ways…including sexually. Just like all other aspects of our identities that get confused, enmeshed with the narcissist, or flat out lost altogether…this is one area that’s very important to explore.

Today I'm sharing about a painting I completed a few years ago that really helped me integrate the sexual aspects of my identity into my general sense of Self.

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The narcissist isn’t in charge anymore. It’s your turn, Overcomer.

You’ll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today.

To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

Hey Overcomer, this week I want to share with you a very special podcast interview I did with Michael Unbroken on the Think Unbroken Podcast. I’ve gotten so much out of Michael’s work, and it was such a privilege to appear on his show. In this interview, you’ll hear me share more of my backstory than I have anywhere else, and you’ll also learn more about some foundational principles behind art therapy. I know that Michael likes to go deep with his guests, so I didn’t hold anything back. I really hope you get a lot out of it.

And as always, if you’d like to check out my Redefined coaching app, join my free Facebook group, join my email list, or anything else, click the link below to find everything you need.

https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

“…what if the trial you want me to overcome is my fear of truly being me…my creative self…totally putting myself out there for all to see? What if my flaw is not in failing to be practical enough, but in failing to JUMP…fully into the waves, trusting your love will catch me there. There’s love beneath the waves.”I'm sharing with you in real time today, Overcomer.

I'm not sitting up high on a pedestal of self-actualization, condescending to share my knowledge with you. I am a survivor...an Overcomer...of narcissistic abuse, still very much on this journey of healing and redefining my identity.

I'm here to share some tools and skills with you that I've learned along the way, and to show you how I am STILL using them to become more and more of who I am meant to be.

Today I'm getting super vulnerable. I invite you to hear what aspects of my identity I'm currently struggling with the most. I'm feeling tension between two different parts of my Self, and still wrestling through it.

And as always, it's my art and writing process that is helping me uncover what I need along the way.

I hope you'll listen in...

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The narcissist isn’t in charge anymore. It’s your turn, Overcomer.

You’ll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today.

To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

“…I’m being held back- from exploring, traveling, from joy! from being fully comfortable in my own skin.”

What happens when we feel restricted and trapped by abusive individuals, BUT we take a risk and trust ourselves for a change?

Everything, that's what.

Everything in our life starts to shift from that point...for the better.

Today I'm excited and honored to share an insightful piece of art and writing from Alex, one of my group coaching clients.

She took a chance on herself and did the very hard work of making time and space to explore all parts of herself...and all the ways the angry and difficult parts mixed with the good and joyful parts...ALL of it.

I can't wait for you to hear from her.

In addition to her writing in response to the artwork, I'll be sharing a testimonial of her reflections after completing The Redefined Process. Her growth and insight is inspiring. Seriously. I wouldn't skip this episode.

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The narcissist isn’t in charge anymore. It’s your turn, Overcomer.

You’ll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today.

To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

“I long to let it go and I don't know how.”Have you ever felt this way, Overcomer? Like there's something you long to move past, get over, or let go of....and you just can't seem to do it. It doesn't make sense. It's confusing. It feels like you're working against yourself, even though you don't want to be.

Not only have I been there in the past, but I honestly think it's an ongoing part of the human condition. It's something we have to constantly be aware of and address.

The good news....

I believe it does get easier once we are aware of this push-pull dynamic within ourselves, and once we've gotten some practice addressing it.

But you've gotta be willing to get honest with yourself.

If you're fed up with feeling stuck, then today's episode is for you.

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The narcissist isn’t in charge anymore. It’s your turn, Overcomer.

You’ll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today.

To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

“...I am me and that's ALL I will ever be. And all I need. ME- she's protected, she's cared for, she's whole."⁠

It all comes back to identity. Every single time.

I've found that the root cause of our feeling of stuck-ness in life, lack of confidence, self doubt, you name it... those lingering symptoms from the trauma of narcissistic abuse...they hang around because we've lost our connection to our identity.

We don't know who we are anymore. Our sense of self was so enmeshed with the abuser that we didn't know where they ended and we began. Breaking out of that pattern and boldly stepping into the uncharted waters of Self...the new and unexplored You...is very hard, and very scary at times.

Today we'll be diving into some ways of reconnecting with and redefining identity. We are reminding ourselves: I am whole. Your true sense of self isn't lost somewhere outside of you. It's all there, within you now. It's time to tap into it.

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The narcissist isn’t in charge anymore. It’s your turn, Overcomer.

You’ll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today.

To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

The best part about escaping narcissistic abuse is that we are finally free to make our own choices!

This can feel daunting at times (trust me, I know the struggle is real), but ultimately it's the best thing ever.

One of the places I've found the greatest sense of freedom on my healing journey is within the creative process. It's a place to play, explore, discover, learn, and test the waters of what it feels like to truly embrace all my emotions...the good, the bad, the ugly...it's all come out in my artmaking practice, for sure. And...it's OKAY. This is a no-judgment zone. All thoughts, feelings, and expressions welcome.

Last week, I went in-depth sharing with you the Why of this process that I teach. And on today's episode, I'm going to share a super practical art exercise that you can do right away....it's the How. And it's the foundation of this Redefined Process that I'm modeling for you on the podcast. . . The narcissist isn’t in charge anymore. It’s your turn, Overcomer. You’ll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today. To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

“It feels luscious and open and like there’s more to find, more to be, places to go, oceans to swim in and new people to love.”

Where are you going, Overcomer?

Have you given yourself permission to explore a new world of joy that lives somewhere beyond the trauma reactions you feel so stuck in today?

I know first hand how hard it can be to pull ourselves out of those familiar (yet unwanted) emotional and behavioral patterns. But...it can be done!

Today we'll explore just that, and along the way I'll explain more about art therapy, and this process that I teach. This one's choc full of information, so you won't want to miss it!

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The narcissist isn’t in charge anymore. It’s your turn, Overcomer.

You’ll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today.

To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

“The black is more at the bottom. I put it there. The other top colors needed to fall…to dissipate into the darker floor. They needed to trickle and be enveloped and held there by the anchoring grief.”

The narcissist isn’t in charge anymore. It’s your turn, Overcomer. You’ll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today.

To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

“But you choose to feel like you're failing. You choose to look at this picture and you need to turn the page and make a new one - constantly, every day. More than once per day. Make a new picture until the old one stops feeling real...⁠”

The narcissist isn't in charge anymore. It's your turn, Overcomer.

You'll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today.

To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer

“It feels so heavy and stuck in the middle, but it can flow, if I release it. I do have the choice.”

The narcissist isn’t in charge anymore. It’s your turn, Overcomer. You’ll hear art therapist and coach, Jennifer Kramer, share a glimpse into her unique art and writing process that helps women redefine their identity after narcissistic abuse, one drawing or painting at a time. Jennifer also invites you to imagine what encouraging words your Future Self may have for you today.

To view the art image discussed in the episode, sign up for weekly emails, or learn more about The Redefined Process, go here: https://linktr.ee/jenniferakramer