The Becoming Heroes Podcast: Recent Episodes
Guidance, hosted by Lex McKee, to feed the Hero within you!
"Becoming Heroes," is the podcast for the Hero inside of you. Every Hero needs a Guide to help them become the best version of themselves. Our podcast brings you the best Guides and guidance in bite-sized chunks of awesomeness!
Intermission Mark my words, there are many powerful ways to transform our lives… and here is the first. Have you ever tried to stay cross in the middle of an argument when someone makes you laugh – perhaps by pulling a face? In truth, it’s really annoying when you’re angry and someone interrupts that feeling by making you smile or giggle… but once you grin, they win! And so do you. The spell is broken. The cycle is too. Psychologists call this a ‘pattern interrupt’ and it’s a brilliant way to get yourself out of a pickle if you feel your emotions are heading in a direction you want to change. Your emotions are designed to serve you, not the other way around, and if you feel you’re losing control, call for an intermission. This is surprisingly easy to do. Why? Because your brain believes your body. As soon as you change your physical position, your mental posture automatically follows. I noticed a lovely Mum last night running to catch up with her two young children, and this reminded me of one of my grandchildren who runs everywhere! There’s an energy and enthusiasm to his life that is very engaging. Lambs do it too. And calves. And puppies. And kids… baby goats! Then something happens as we mature. We begin to slow down. Boring. Action plan: when you feel stuck or out of control, do something different with your posture and pace. Dare you! Here’s what happened to me next… Making sure no one was looking, I decided to run back to the house - just like a kid. My capacity was poor – about 5 yards, but it was all I needed – I was grinning - out of breath but grinning. And when you’re grinning, you’re winning.
A BLESSING FOR YOU!May you receive this blessing as you listen to this psalm, recorded with you in mind.Psalm 20New International Version (adapted on the recording to us the Lord's name)For the director of music. A psalm of David.May the Lord answer you when you are in distress; may the name of the God of Jacob protect you.May he send you help from the sanctuary and grant you support from Zion.May he remember all your sacrifices and accept your burnt offerings.May he give you the desire of your heart and make all your plans succeed.May we shout for joy over your victory and lift up our banners in the name of our God.May the Lord grant all your requests.Now this I know: The Lord gives victory to his anointed.He answers him from his heavenly sanctuary with the victorious power of his right hand.Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the Lord our God.They are brought to their knees and fall, but we rise up and stand firm.Lord, give victory to the king! Answer us when we call!Wouldn't it be lovely to appoint a Director of Music for our Church?
Would you rather?“Would you rather be chased by a horse-sized duck, or by one hundred duck-sized horses?” Thus says one of the ‘Would you rather?’ challenges from the wrappers round a famous brand of ‘Take a Break’ chocolate snack. I’d be curious to hear your answer – then I’ll reveal my choice in the comments!“Would you rather?” reminds me of one of my favourite sayings from Wayne Dyer: “I can choose peace rather than this.” Would you rather have peace or conflict? Isn’t it surprising, shocking even, that some people would genuinely prefer conflict? This is particularly so in the area of forgiveness vs unforgiveness. Many people would rather hold on to their sense of outrage, injury, and pain rather than let it go.Somewhere last week I read a story about two monks – an elderly and a younger – climbing and walking down the steep mountain sides of wild country. Their Order did not permit them to touch a woman (I know, how ridiculous!), but when their path crossed a mighty rushing stream in one of the gullies, they found a young woman in distress. She needed to cross the stream to get home but the flood-waters were flowing too fast for her to cross safely.Without a moment’s hesitation, the mature monk respectfully lifted the woman onto his back, and waded across the raging waters, safely to the other side. The woman thanked him and then ran on happily her way home.The two monks went ahead on in silence for hours, but the older, wiser, monk could tell that the younger was very agitated. Eventually, the younger burst out, “Our Order does not permit us to engage with women, let alone touch one – and yet you carried one across that mountain stream!”The older, wiser monk gently observed, “Ah, that’s true… and I put her down on the other side, as easily and as rapidly as I had picked her up… I notice that you are still carrying her.”There is so much we all carry in life that is so past its “Carry-Until” Date – its “Best Before” Date. These burdens are way beyond the point in time that caused the injury. In many cases, the ‘guilty’ party is no longer aware of the offence. Today is a great day to ask ourselves, “Would we rather keep carrying this, or would we prefer to be liberated from this hard burden?”I finish with Wayne Dyer’s inviting affirmation again, “I can choose peace, rather than this…”
Grace Will Walk Us Homeby Thom M ShumanWild Goose Publicationswww.ionabooks.comUsed under agreed non-commercial worship conditions as stated by the publisher.MusicAtmos from Big Fish Audio - used under licence.
Grace Will Walk Us Homeby Thom M ShumanWild Goose Publicationswww.ionabooks.comUsed under agreed non-commercial worship conditions as stated by the publisher.MusicAtmos from Big Fish Audio - used under licence.
A Gift for You This ChristmasYou may never have seen yourself as the life and soul of the party. That epithet is reserved too often for the stereotypically noisy extrovert – so popular with fabulous sitcom writers - that grabs focus from everyone they meet! If you are like me, you could be fiercely introverted! Let’s open your gift and discover more.Whether you are more introverted or extroverted, that’s your gift!Whether you process what’s happening in a more intuitive way, or observant – using your senses, that’s your gift!How you make decisions and deal with those pesky emotions – on a scale from detached logic (Mr Spock) through to deep empathy (non-biased description here) is also your gift!And how about your organisational skills? Are you more comfortable with structure, predictability, and planning? Or does that cramp your options? Wherever you are, whoever you are, that’s your gift!How about your comfort and confidence with who you are? Are you assertively confident in your own skin? Or perhaps you’re more turbulent and unsure of yourself – constantly trying to improve?Why are we bringing this up again – after all many of us have blogged on this in the past? We’re bringing it into focus again because often you can’t bring it into focus without external help. Your gifts and your talents and your unique personal strengths are as plain, “as the nose on your face.” Obvious to others, but they can see your nose. You, on the other hand, see your nose from behind! I’ve just tried it and gone cross-eyed like those unfortunate cinema shots where the eyes of the lovers are captured as they are about to kiss!If you can gift yourself 20 minutes, go to 16personalities.com, sign up for a free account, and take the free look in the mirror! Then you’ll be able to see plainly and clearly that beautiful nose on your face. Remember to share your results!If you don’t fancy that yet – know that your friends are your mirror. You could ask them what they think your strengths are. That would be bold and daring wouldn’t it?Ready for the punchline? I realised this morning that you ARE the life and SOUL of the party – because your soul is defined only by one person – you – and you are totally unique. That’s something to be proud of. Thus, you can be the best gift to those around you this holiday season by simply being the fullest version of you you can imagine!
Shift HappensAll At SeaTwo battleships assigned to the training squadron had been at sea on manoeuvres in heavy weather for several days. I was serving on the lead battleship and was on watch on the bridge as night fell. The visibility was poor with patch fog, so the captain, remained on the bridge keeping an eye on all activities.Shortly after dark, the lookout on the wing of the bridge reported, “Light, bearing on the starboard bow.”“Is it steady or moving astern?” the captain called out.Lookout replied, “Steady, captain,” which meant we were on a dangerous collision course with that ship.The captain then called to the signalman, “Signal that ship: We are on a collision course, advise you change course 20 degrees.”Back came a signal, “Advisable for you to change course 20 degrees.”The captain said, “Send, I’m a captain, change course 20 degrees.”“I’m a seaman second class,” came the reply. “You had better change course 20 degrees.”By that time, the captain was furious. He spat out, “Send, I’m a battleship. Change course 20 degrees.”Back came the flashing light, “I’m a lighthouse.”We changed course. The Man on the Subway“I remember a mini-paradigm shift I experienced one Sunday morning on a subway in New York. People were sitting quietly – some reading newspapers, some lost in thought, some resting with their eyes closed. It was a calm, peaceful scene.Then suddenly, a man and his children entered the subway car. The children were so loud and rambunctious that instantly the whole climate changed.The man sat down next to me and closed his eyes, apparently oblivious to the situation. The children were yelling back and forth, throwing things, even grabbing people’s papers. It was very disturbing. And yet, the man sitting next to me did nothing. It was difficult not to feel irritated. I could not believe that he could be so insensitive as to let his children run wild like that and do nothing about it, taking no responsibility at all. It was easy to see that everyone else on the subway felt irritated, too. So finally, with what I felt was like unusual patience and restraint, I turned to him and said, “Sir, your children are really disturbing a lot of people. I wonder if you couldn’t control them a little more?”The man lifted his gaze as if to come to a consciousness of the situation for the first time and said softly, “Oh, you’re right. I guess I should do something about it. We just came from the hospital where their mother died about an hour ago. I don’t know what do think, and I guess they don’t know who to handle it either.”Can you imagine what I felt at that moment? My paradigm shifted. Suddenly I saw things differently, and because I saw differently, I thought differently, I felt differently, I behaved differently. My irritation vanished. I didn’t have to worry about controlling my attitude or my behavior; my heart was filled with the man’s pain. Feelings of sympathy and compassion flowed freely. “Your wife just died? Oh I’m so sorry! Can you tell me about it? What can I do to help?” Everything changed in an instant.”
ZoonamiWe all have precious moments when providence or serendipity sends us a treat. One such precious moment was last night in the freezing cold on Swanage’s Victorian Pier. A crowd of us was there for the switching on the lights by Father Christmas (who arrived by boat!)Waiting in the cold, looking out over the waves under the moonlight, a small girl asked her Dad if a big wave had ever flooded the pier. Realising she meant a Tsunami, her Dad shared the word with her as he reassured her… but here’s the thing: I heard him say, “Zoonami!”Of course, he didn’t say that, but it was too late, my imagination was engaged! I ‘saw’ a flood of animals coming into Swanage Bay on surf boards (like the seagull I’d recently seen surfing on driftwood.) (Thought to self: I probably need to change my medication!)And this brings me to today’s two questions:Q. What animal would you most like to be?AndQ. Why?Dog or Cat?Cat or Mouse?Dinosaur – but which one?Fish, Amphibian, Reptile, Bird, Mammal?Orangutan, Gibbon (Funky, of course), Gorilla, Chimpanzee?They say confession is good for the soul, so I’ll lead by example!I want to be an Otter.Why?They are massively playful, lithe, and love fish, of course!To me, they stay young forever through their combination of frisky fun-loving living, insatiable curiosity, and healthy diet.Once you’ve decided on your animal or bird (and shared it with us), how could you be more like your Avatar?How could I be ‘more Otter’? Hmm, I think that Sea Swimming is beckoning again!I’m looking forward to a flood, a Zoonami, of witty, wise, and wonderful revelations of your favourite animals!
Isaiah 11 vv1 and 2Getting to Know The Holy SpiritJesus was clear that to see Him was to see the Father. And we could equally say, to see Him was to see the Character of The Holy Spirit. Here in Isaiah chapter 11 verses 1 and 2, we ‘see’ The Holy Spirit, the very Spirit of YHWH.And the spirit of the YHWH shall rest upon Him, the Spirit of Wisdom and Understanding, the Spirit of Counsel and Might, the Spirit of Knowledge and of the Fear of the YHWH; Quoting from Charles Ellicott's excellent 19th century commentary.“And the spirit of the Lord shall rest upon him . . .” —The words throw us at once back upon the memories of the past, and forwards upon the hopes of the future. It was the “spirit of the Lord” that had made men true heroes and judges in the days of old (Judges 11:29; Judges 13:25). It was in the “spirit of the Lord” descending on Jesus of Nazareth and abiding on Him (John 1:33) that men were taught to see the token that He was the Christ of God. And in this case the spirit was to give more than the heroic daring which had characterised Jephthah and Samson. The future King was to be as a David and Solomon in one, pre-eminent, chiefly, as the Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:7), in the wisdom and counsel which had been the glory of the latter.“Wisdom,” in its highest form, as implying the comprehension of the secret things of God;“Understanding,” as the sagacity which discerned the right thing to do and the right word to say (Hebrews 5:14) in all human relationships; these formed the first link in the chain of supernatural gifts. With these there was to be the “spirit of counsel and might,” the clear purpose and strength which fits a king for the right exercise of sovereignty; and lastly, as at once the crown and source of all, the “spirit of knowledge and of the fear of the Lord,” the reverence and faith which is “the beginning of all wisdom” (Proverbs 1:7). The copious use of the vocabulary of the Book of Proverbs is interesting as showing the part which that book played in the prophet’s education.
There’s no fruit without there first being a seed.The man on the corner by one of Swanage’s many pubs proudly wore a T-Shirt with just two words: “Bad Seed.” I think he thought it was funny. I didn’t.I want to sow “Good Seed” during this season of goodwill to all. The whole World knows we need this.Specifically, I’d love, along with you, to play our part in growing the traditional seasonal fruits of hope, joy, peace, and love (or ‘charity’ if you like old-fashioned version!) Reminds me of the three angels I had branded with a spelling error: Faith, Love, and Hop. I kid you not. I’d like to have been ‘Hop’. Have you tried skipping lately? It’s liberating. Children do it all the time… naturally… freely. Be childlike today.How do we sow seeds of hope? Hope is always to do with the future – so anytime we can make anyone feel better about their future, we’ve sown seeds of hope. Paint a picture in people’s imaginations of a brighter better tomorrow.How do we sow seeds of joy? I think Spike Milligan had the right idea:“Smiling is infectious,you catch it like the flu,When someone smiled at me today, I started smiling too.”[The full poem can be read here: https://noc-events.co.uk/sites/conference.noc.ac.uk/files/documents/Smile%20-%20By%20Spike%20Milligan.pdf but be careful, it’s contagious.]Stick a grin on your chin, and see who says, “Hey, I’m ‘in’!”How do we sow seeds of peace? That’s the answer to a big Nobel prize-winning question! Maybe it’s as simple as always looking for what we share in common with others? I watched, “Derry Girls,” for the first time this year. It was a profound experience, highlighting the humour and the tension of the troubles in Northern Ireland. In one particularly touching episode the way to peace was by finding that common ground.And, finally, and perhaps most importantly, how do we sow seeds of love? I think that’s the easiest question to answer. Those of us who want more friendship must show ourselves to be friendly. We, very generally speaking, reap what we sow – that’s the way of Nature. What does, ‘’being shown love,” mean to you? Once you can answer that, go and do that for or to someone else. Maybe, just maybe, we’re all about to have a very good day indeed!
Major General (retired) Tim Cross CBE is an excellent speaker. If you get the chance to hear him, I’d recommend it. He’s an advocate of the role of ethics in making tough military decisions in the moment of crisis. When we invited him to speak to our “Any Questions” group, his repeated use of ‘retired’ caught my attention.
Tim’s reason is simply that he is retired from that role, but the role is never forgotten - even though he is no longer in active service.
I was struggling with some habitually negative patterns of thinking and the thought came to me, “What if I was retired from that role?” What if I’m a habitual professional worrier (retired)? If I’m retired, I don’t do that anymore.
I only share this with you because it was so effective for about three days. Every time the negative thought patterns arose, I reminded myself that I was ‘retired’ from that role. It made me smile, and broke the cycle. I had three days peace.
Of course, I can’t promise you even three days peace, but if it works for today, it’s a thought worth playing with. Pick something that you don’t want to continue doing, thinking, or feeling, and declare you’re ‘retired’ from that behaviour, thought, or feeling!
We’d all be delighted to hear how it works for you too.
“There is nothing good or bad, but thinking makes it so.”
Pursuing the kind of thinking that may make something (like the day ahead) good, my second thought is to borrow someone else’s thoughts. When we see any focus from someone else’s perspective, new possibilities emerge as we follow them to think down a different path.
This is one of the many reasons I love the “Thought for the day” that Caroline manages to find to enrich each blog. Suddenly, we see the topic through a different lens.
Here is Friday’s once more.
Thought for the day: "Tone is often the most important part of a conversation - and listening is so much more important than what you say." Hoda Kotb This added beautifully to Leah’s blog on Content and Tone. Leah asked about whether our mood affected how we listened. In a sense, that’s a tone of listening – which I’d never thought about. We have tone of voice – but maybe we can have a tone of listening too. If it’s a critical tone, do we then find fault with everything said no matter the other person’s intent?
I suggest that you want a new insight on any topic, theme, or focus – ask Auntie Google or Sister Alexa for a quote on the thought. You can almost guarantee that some wise person has invested the output of hours of many grey cells on thrashing through the different angles. This is one of several ways I get out of being stuck in my own thoughts – borrow someone else’s! Putting it to the test, I’ve just typed, “quote on anger” into Google. A series of images with quotes came up. The first that caught my eye was from Ralph Waldo Emerson. He said, “For every minute you remain angry, you give up sixty seconds of peace of mind.” Nice.
Another way to borrow someone else’s thoughts is to use your imagination and ask, “What would (name the person) think?” I wasted a few years bemoaning the thought that there were no more heroes anymore. Then, I changed my mind, and realised heroes are all around me. My Nan, my partner, and my piano teacher are three immediate examples.
My Nan’s heroic power was calm patience. She would have agreed with Thomas Jefferson’s assertion: “When angry count to ten before you speak; if very angry, count to one hundred!” My partner’s heroic power is thoughtful kindness. On an almost daily basis she is thinking of something someone else would like – looking at the opportunity empathetically through their eyes. My piano teacher’s heroic power is joy. She radiates joy. And the more I get to know her, I now realise she still radiates joy when Life is not so kind. Thus, if I were to ask myself, “What would D say about this?” the answer would always have a good dollop of joy mixed with it!
Who are the heroes through whose eyes you could look at your situation? What is their heroic power? What’s the quote that changes your mind?
“There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.”
So says William Shakespeare via the lips of Hamlet. (Act II, Scene 2.
Whether you believe this absolutely or partially, it begs the question, “What’s good thinking?” Or, “What’s the kind of thinking that makes us see each experience as good?”
One pattern of thought that’s really helped me recently is a tweak on the gratitude-attitude that we so often speak of in our blogs and comments. Specifically, it is asking myself, “What’s working?”
When Life is tough, it can feel like nothing’s working. But this is rarely, if ever, the truth. I’ve got a few issues at the moment that I can’t think how to fix – they are ‘not working’ but they are a tiny part of a massive portion of my life that is working. Thus, I ask you directly, what’s working in your Life at the moment?
The answers to this question may surprise you in the little things that come to mind, almost in the same breath as the big things. As far as big things go, Penny and I really enjoy one another’s company, and the little kindnesses we find to do for one another and say to one another. There are so many tokens of thoughtfulness that say, “You matter to me.”
She is very good at reminding me (when I feel overwhelmed) that, “Remember, I love you.” Those four words (and their many loving and creative variants) are a foundation for a Life that can weather many storms.
But what of the small matters that are working – a list I’ve shared here many times. It would be therapeutic for you to mirror this pattern of thinking for yourself. What small things are working well in your life? Immediately springing to mind is the first new bloom of a magnificent orchid we have. I think of the perfect blend of coffee we’ve found and settled upon as ‘our brand’. There’s the shower in our well-lit bathroom. The goats’ milk soap that is ’my favourite’. I know what wine works for me. I love my ‘commute’ to work – such a beautiful journey. The autumn leaves changing day to day. My friends who thrive at our coffee morning each Friday. My radio show and the station manager who makes working there such a pleasure. Finding, “Now and Then,” by the Carpenters in a charity shop (5 CDs for a £1!) The list goes on and on making me smile.
I wonder if you would do me a favour today and pause for thought. Ask your wonderful mind, “What’s working for us at the moment?” and then sit back and enjoy the answers…
This is good thinking
Music to My Ears
I’ve found her… at last!
“Who?” you say.
“My Piano Teacher,” I say!
At last, I have found the perfect piano teacher… for me.
Danielle (who I shall be raving about by name in online reviews, so no secrecy necessary about her name) is the most encouraging and affirming teacher I have ever met. (And I mean the most affirming and encouraging teacher in any subject.) More than this, she meets her students where they are – musically. Then she sets a course for where they want to get to.
All my previous teachers were good teachers. They taught well. But they taught their agenda. It was ‘their way’ or ‘find another teacher’. That is no bad thing because all of them had a proven way that worked. I find it fascinating, though, that I didn’t stick with them. Their way wasn’t the best fit for my way.
Danielle uses all kinds of magic to make it work. As an educator of some sort myself, I notice that she is using ‘Pacing’ and ‘Leading’. By this, I mean she ‘paces’ me, her student, in my map of the world first. She was very astute at uncovering exactly what I wanted to achieve. She began our classes with my desired destination in mind, and we started with patterns that would be of immediate value to me.
Here’s where the ‘leading’ comes in. (‘Pacing’ and ‘Leading’.) Once deep rapport was established, Danielle very gently nudged me towards the less exciting disciplines that were not on my agenda: note-reading, scales, and a couple of children’s books to learn the basics that are essential to strengthen my own agenda! She knew best.
I believe she’s got the order right: listen to what the ‘student’ desires and dreams of, give them 80% of the time on that, and then lead them, 20% of the time to the other material that you know is good for them.
As in Piano Teaching, so in Life. Perhaps Danielle’s approach would work for bigger issues. Perhaps Danielle’s approach would work for bigger issues… on a global scale.
There is a deeper magic, though. I have a chaotic personality. I’d love to be disciplined and tidy and diligent and organised… but I never will be – not if history is an accurate predictor of the future. Yes, people can change, but I doubt I will – not at that fundamental level. This is where Danielle wins over every other teacher I’ve ever met. There is not one word of criticism from her. Not a word. Only encouragement. I feel like a flower, battered by the winds of Winter, beginning to grow taller and stronger to face the hope of Spring. I’m sure her gentle approach will bear fruit. Encouragement can do that for a person.
Here’s the weirdly wonderful part. I now enjoy every practice session I take time for. I even find myself humming the children’s tunes; oh, “Firefly,” how I love thee!
May we all ‘Be More Danielle’. May we listen to what ‘they’ want first and help them move towards their dreams, and only when we have rapport – deep rapport - may we then make helpful additional suggestions. And may we become more encouraging with not a word of criticism. Pace, lead, encourage.
Perfect.
Our theme for World Day of Prayer was, "I Know The Plans I Have For You." The day and the service were planned and printed and prepared for well-before any knowledge of what was to happen in Ukraine. For this reason, I believe it is doubly comforting. God is in the business of restoring people who have been displaced from their homeland.
More than this, He is also committed to their wellbeing during any season of displacement. The passage we had was Jeremiah 29:1-14, some of which I share in the podcast. I do not believe the displacement of the Ukrainian people is anything other than the purpose of Russia (unlike this passage that has a very different political and historical perspective). I share the words because they show God's heart is towards those who are displaced, and His purpose for them is only good - to give them a future and a hope.
We, of course, have a part to play in making certain this is so.
Anne Squires is an excellent spokesperson for Fairtrade and the benefits of supporting Fairtrade suppliers. The interview was recorded today as Monday 21st February, 2021 is the beginning of "Fairtrade Fortnight." https://www.fairtrade.org.uk
The interview is due to go out on Purbeck Coast FM tomorrow morning on my Breakfast Show.
You can listen from anywhere you have an internet connection by following this link: https://bit.ly/listentopurbeck
Do you enjoy the benefits of having a generous heart? Those who truly love are naturally generous givers. They give without expecting to receive in return. They give without any hidden agenda. They give because they LOVE to give. They give for pleasure.
This is a ministry and a gift. It is also the secret of divine prosperity until you start giving in order to receive... then it goes a little haywire!
The path to prosperity is to realise that giving is like planting seeds. What you plant is not what is going to come up. In a similar way, what you plant may not be returned to you from the place or people where you planted it.
Become a greater Lover by becoming a greater Giver.
Great song to go with this theme: https://youtu.be/DL7-CKirWZE
I quote the Moodscope.com site: What is Moodscope?
Moodscope members seek to support each other by sharing their experiences through this blog. If you’d like to receive these daily posts by email, just sign up to Moodscope now, completely free of charge.
Moodscope is an innovative way for people to treat their own low mood problems using an engaging online tool. Anyone in the world can accurately assess and track daily mood scores over a period of time. We have proved that the very act of measuring, tracking and sharing mood can actually lift it.
[End Quote] I believe in Moodscope so much that I have written (for publication each Monday) a blog for many years. Of course, I am in no way pretending that I have the answers. Rather, my blog is one person's perspective on the journey, he hopes, to good mental health.
Today's blog is about experimenting with giving to others first before asking for or expecting anything in return.
It was recorded in difficult circumstances when storm Eunice took out our electricity. This means it is not up to the usual broadcast quality, being recorded, as it was, on mobile, battery-powered kit.
Here's a good song that goes with this: https://youtu.be/DL7-CKirWZE
The 12th Day of Christmas
On the 12th Day of Christmas, we celebrate the Eve of Epiphany. This means we are on the cusp of change. We end the 12 Days of Christmas and move into Epiphany. I rather like the decision of the Council of Tours in 567 (what a great date!) that there should be celebrations from Christmas Day through to Epiphany Eve – which gave birth to the 12 Days of Christmas – or what we Brits call Christmastide. This is a splendid idea since most folks don’t really come back to work until about 10th January! Holding to this tradition and adapting it to the modern work pattern, we’d have 12 Days of feasting and 4 days to detox!
In fact, the ancient pattern wasn’t that far away from that - because there is a tradition of fasting during Advent to get ready for the feasting.
Fasting, feasting, detox!
From tomorrow, Epiphanytide will run until Candlemas. What is Epiphany? This is traditionally when the Three Kings came to adore the baby. Thus, the Irish tradition of adding the figures of the Three Kings to the Nativity scene on Twelfth Night ready for Epiphany.
But that’s tomorrow… let’s talk about partying!
The famous Carol, “Here we come a wassailing,” refers to this evening where the poor would often go door-to-door singing songs of good cheer and blessing each household in return for a drink from the wassail bowl – filled with hot ale, apples, spices, and mead! The noun, “wassail,” refers to the drink.
Where the wassail is more cider than ale, it can be connected to a more rural request for a good cider apple crop in the year to come. To wassail, as a verb, means to party on in the lively way associated with twelfth night, and also to go from house-to-house singing carols. It should, therefore, be a jolly good evening!
Another tradition you may enjoy bringing back is the King Cake – baked with a bean and a pea. I’m guessing there was a separate cake for the boys and the girls as whoever gets the piece with the pea in gets to be Queen for the night, and whoever gets the bean gets to be King… for one night. We can be heroes just for one day. Servants would become masters. This could become a fun family tradition for you and yours - if only for one night!
Do we need any deep spiritual message for today and tonight? I don’t think so. Epiphany, tomorrow, is deeply significant, but for tonight let’s enter into the spirit of celebration, blessing, thanksgiving, and generosity… and if you don’t have the energy for that, you could always watch Shakespeare’s comedy, “Twelfth Night.” (But that’s another story.)
Imagine being asked to leave a monastery for being too extreme. This was part of the journey taken by Simeon Stylites - a famous "Pillar Saint".
Focus gets results.
Jesus was presented at the Temple, as was the Jewish tradition. This involved circumcision as the child's name was presented to God. We'd talk about a Christening nowadays, and a lot less blood and pain!
In the classic movie, "Dances With Wolves," we learn of the Native American tradition of naming someone according to their most visible or memorable characteristic or characteristic behaviour. Kevin Costner's character was seen dancing with wolves, hence the name. What would your Native American Name be from your current lifestyle? What would you prefer it to be if that's not a happy answer?
🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄THE 9TH DAY OF CHRISTMAS Saint Basil on Social Justice (and more!) The 16th Sustainable Development Goal of the United Nations is, "Peace, Justice, and Strong Institutions." Goal 10 of the 17 is, "Reduced Inequalities." Goal 1 is, "No Poverty." Goal 2 is, "Zero Hunger," and Goal 5 is, "Gender Equality." Saint Basil would approve.
Quote 1 When someone steals another's clothes, we call them a thief. Should we not give the same name to one who could clothe the naked and does not? The bread in your cupboard belongs to the hungry; the coat unused in your closet belongs to the one who needs it; the shoes rotting in your closet belong to the one who has no shoes; the money which you hoard up belongs to the poor.
Quote 2 A tree is known by its fruit; a man by his deeds. A good deed is never lost; he who sows courtesy reaps friendship, and he who plants kindness gathers love.
Quote 3 While we try to amass wealth, make piles of money, get hold of the land as our real property, overtop one another in riches, we have palpably cast off justice, and lost the common good. I should like to know how any man can be just, who is deliberately aiming to get out of someone else what he wants for himself.
Enjoy more of Basil's wisdom here: https://lnkd.in/gUxyujtx and https://lnkd.in/gKQ8GmmZ
4thDayofChristmas #SocialJustice #17SDGs #B1G1 #money #sustainabledevelopment #gender #kindness
"Let It Be" When I find myself in times of trouble, Mother Mary comes to me Speaking words of wisdom, let it be And in my hour of darkness she is standing right in front of me Speaking words of wisdom, let it be Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be Whisper words of wisdom, let it be [Songwriters: Paul Mccartney / John Lennon]
This is a necessarily shortened version of the video that can be seen here: https://youtu.be/qaPxbFurxKk In the video, I lose it... touched by the loss of my own Mum. The space 'works' on the video because you can see and thus understand my grieving, but not necessarily on the audio.
I wonder if the Reformation was a rejection of Motherhood? It's an interesting thought given the venom against Mary. What would have happened if Sigmund Freud had access to Martin Luther? Imagine Luther on the couch and Ziggy saying, "Tell me about your Mother..."
In this very emotional recording, captured last Christmas, I realise (watching the video again with some distance) that my own loss of my Mum is impacting what I share. Mum died in 2019, and the wounds are still raw. However, this is the point of the Podcast and the Vlog - we all need a Mother figure.
[Pauline reference is 1 Corinthians 4:15 "For though you have ten thousand tutors in Christ, you don’t have many fathers. For in Christ Jesus, I became your father through the Good News."]
Enjoy then, a fresh, if emotional, appreciation of Mary and Motherhood on this, the 8th Day of Christmas.
Oh, and also enjoy the shout outs to two other great Mother figures: Guan Yin and... Moominmamma, with her handbag full of wonders and compforts!
Not content with bringing focus back to Mother Mary, here's a bit of Eastern Philosophy! https://youtu.be/5yZ8a_zAEl0 - it includes Guan Yin.
I sincerely believe this is the year to Choose Your Tribe – and to choose wisely. I guess that means also it’s the year to change your tribe.
Your tribe may begin with a local association, for example, “Dorset.” I’m a huge fan of Dorset, which I’ve called my ‘home’ since the turn of the Century. This is why I think sites like designedindorest.co.uk are important as hubs for local arts and crafts and trades – and our identity as Dorset People, Dorset Folk.
Your tribe may be centred on a product. Think Harley Davidson – more than a mere motorcycle. I’m always tickled at people who are passionate about Landrovers. I had a Freelander (if that counts) and it was the worst car ever! Clearly, this goes beyond the reliability of the product to a place in fans’ minds that accepts that the product says something about them. It gives them a group identity, a tribal identity.
Some of the most powerful tribes focus on a belief system which is then expressed in choices in music, clothing, rituals. I was delighted to bump into a bunch of Steampunks in Dorchester. I hope they are taking over! The dress code set them apart even before we spoke.
How about you? What tribes do you feel a part of? What tribes would you like to feel a part of? And this is an essential part of deciding which tribes to leave. If you’re not feeling missed by those tribes, if you’re not feeling valued by those tribes – leave!
Today, Penelope and I were chatting about the Jehovah Witnesses. There’s a powerful tribe if ever I’ve seen one. What’s the attraction? I think the attraction is the tribe itself – and the strong sense of belonging – and the strong sense of identity. They have a set of beliefs that are matched by a congruent and consistent set of actions and activities.
“People like us, do this…”
And, most importantly, if you were ever ill or absent, I am certain you would know you were ‘missed’ and that you were cherished.
Belonging is a powerful sense.
Belonging is a powerful state of being.
Belonging leads to a sense and state of wellness.
My prayer and hope for you and for me in this coming year is that we always make people feel missed when they pull away for any reason. That we make them feel great. And that we commit to encouraging others on a daily basis.
One of my favourite verses will take us back to the metaphor of Saint Sylvester’s Dragon. In the book of Hebrews it says, “…exhort one another day by day, so long as it is called “today”, lest any one of you be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin.” (You can find that in chapter three of the book of Hebrews, verse 13.)
The Greek word for ‘exhort’ is amazing. It’s the word very similar to the one used of the Holy Spirit as the One called alongside to help. The Comforter. The Helper. The Encourager. The Advocate. The One you can call upon. Isn’t this the best concept for friendship? “Hey, you can call upon me…” Our mission is to be just like God! To be the Encourager, the Helper, the one called alongside to support, the one you can rely upon, your advocate, your fan, your ambassador.
But what about the dragon? Dragons (somewhat sadly) are associated with evil in the Bible… as, indeed, is “sin”. The idea in this vital verse is that daily encouragement is good medicine. Daily encouragement can protect you and I from the hardening of heart (and thus emotions such as compassion) that comes from “deceitfulness of sin.” If we are discouraged, it too easy to slip into a really dark place.
We need to focus on what we really want. Finding a tribe that encourages one another of a daily basis can protect us from the hard cynicism that leads to a bitter spirit.
I wish you joy this coming year, a tribe you can thrive in, a tribe that wants you, a tribe that misses you when you’re not there, and I wish you encouragement on a daily basis – day by day.
Joyful New Year!
With love from God’s Goth.
The 6th Day of Christmas
Saint Egwin (don’t think St Eggwhisk). Absolutely committed to supporting widows and orphans. He was very strict – promoting Christian marriage, and clerical celibacy – which made him less than popular with many! He was dispatched to Rome to seek vindication from the Pope. Miracles happened en route that led to his later recognition as a saint. The miracles are mentioned in the recording so I won’t expand here.
My point – a man of principle whose actions matched his beliefs. He committed to caring for those that God places as a priority too. A man who left a powerful legacy since he went on to found the Abbey at Evesham.
I learned a new word too: “Obloquy,” which means, “strong public condemnation.”
The United Nations have identified 17 Sustainable Development Goals. To take practical action on this, I have been a member for several years of, “Buy One; Give One.” The idea is simple, and the execution is exquisite. Every time I sell a product or service, I pay it forward via a project that reflects one of the goals of the 17 SDGs of the UN. As you ‘buy one’ from me, I ‘give one’ – acknowledging gratefully that you have enabled this gift.
I am very concerned about the loss of direct educational experience that has hit our Nations for over two years now. Whilst I most certainly mean school students, I include anyone of any age who has a love of learning. In response, I am seeking to resurrect the programmes that were at the heart of my happiest times with Buzan Centres. Buzan Centres were the brainchild of the late Tony Buzan (Creator of Mind Mapping) and the birthchild of the very present Vanda North, who set up Buzan Centres Internationally.
We used to run family study weekends together where students of all ages could come and experience the joy of seeing their speed-reading skills increase, their memory boosted, and their ability to organise their thoughts revolutionised.
This recording was captured last Christmas, and in it I made a promise that I haven’t yet kept – to begin those programmes again. Now you can hold me to that promise.
And for every course place that I sell, or gracious gift to support our work that we receive (so we can provide free training too), we will honour Saint Egwin’s spirit by paying a portion forward towards fulfilling the 17 Sustainable Development Goals of the United Nations, via the wonderful B1G1.com
Come, let us learn together, and make a difference together, forever.
If you fancy supporting my work (and great intentions) you can give here: https://bit.ly/InvestStudySkills If you invest, don’t be a stranger – there are a 1000 ways I can say, “Thank You!” and add value to your life. Join the tribes I belong to and feel amazing about the contribution you make.
"SPEAK TRUTH TO POWER" 🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄On the Fifth Day of Christmas🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄 we celebrate Saint Thomas à Becket. These words, famously attributed to Henry II - "Will no one rid me of this turbulent priest?" allegedly provoked the murder of Thomas while in the Cathedral!!!
Why was the king so irritated with Thomas à Becket? Because Thomas didn't have a Paradigm Shift so much as a Paradigm Earthquake! He went from being a very effective fundraiser for the king through way of a profound conversion experience to become an ascetic (one who abstains from sensual pleasures in order to enhance spiritual focus).
What I'm celebrating about Thomas is his courage to "speak to power" - a core principle of Improv! When we pursue "Authenticity" in Improv we become willing to challenge convention, tradition, and the established order. We break the rules when the system they support no longer serves us.
I'm also celebrating his career shift. In this video, recorded last Christmas, I give a SHOUT out for Steve Jones FCMI who trained me in Motivational Mapping. Steve shared with me a powerful example of the difference between recruiting on the strength of your gifts and talents versus the 'authenticity' of recruiting according to what motivates you. The example of the freedom-driven, creatively motivated Barrister becoming a Landscape Gardener still makes my heart sing - thanks Steve! 🙏🥂
WHAT ABOUT YOU? If you feel something isn't quite right with your own career journey, let's get your motivation map done and dusted with a debrief. It may be the current disatisfaction could be your best friend... a better future always lies ahead when you align yourself with what truly motivates you.
In the meatime, "Courage, mon Brave!" Speak truth to power, challenge convention, break some rules... ...and watch your back!
(+44)7990015489
motivation #disruptiveleadership #entrepreneurmindset #career
What can we learn from the massacre of the innocents? Recorded last Christmas as a video (hence the days being 'wrong').
We can fight against evil, including Covid - and what it has stolen from our own innocents - our children.
What do you think is the biggest living organism ever? If you think a Sequoia, you're pretty close. Listen to this podcast to discover one of the greatest works of nature.
Lex 'Starflake' McKee goes deeper into what we can learn from the greatest organism on Earth.
The power of words has been experienced by all of us. When someone genuinely says, "Thank you!" there's a feeling attached to those words. When someone says, "I believe in you," there is empowering energy attached to their faith. And when someone says, "I love you," your life can be transformed.
The Apostle of Love, Saint John, is our Festival Saint for 27th December. In this very short message, we honour the spirit of every beginning: "In the beginning was the Word..."
Calling all the heroic heretics on this, the Feast of Stephen. Drawing more on Seth Godin than on Acts 6 and 7 (which you can read), we explore how our time needs people who can no longer tolerate the status quo. People who will stand up and be counted. People who will lead their tribe.
If you need backing tracks for your congregation, I'm your Mission Enabler. Email me at lex@swanage-urc.co.uk
If you want to laugh, laugh along with me. A lovely friend, who is VERY naughty, sent me a story. We collapsed laughing very soon into reading the story for the first time, so I decided to stop reading and get the recorder going. I'm glad we did! The story is too rude to share but the laughter is free for you to enjoy.
Becoming a H+E+R=O
“Mind The Gap,” is one of my favourite phrases in the UK’s transport system. It is a set of three words designed to keep you and me safe and to help us avoid danger. However, in neuroscience and positive psychology, it offers us a different kind of hope. Instead of safety, it opens the doorway to freedom and excellence.
Every neuron connects to other neurons by managing the gap between them. In the space between neurons, magic happens. When we learn to ‘Mind The Gap’ – to pause long enough to let new neural pathways ‘fire’ - we give ourselves time to transform our natural knee-jerk reactions into considered responses worthy of an esteemed sage!
My beloved Nan had cracked this. She said, “All you need to do, Dear, is count to ten!”
Hi, my name is ‘Lex McKee’ and I’m someone who unfashionably believes in Divine Health, Divine Wealth, and Divine Wellbeing.
This means that I believe that • God wants you well and living in radiant health • God wants you rich and living in abundant wealth, and • God wants you to experience a profound inner peace – a sense of Divine Wellbeing that empowers you to pass through the waters of any trial unscathed, and to emerge even stronger.
Why is this ‘unfashionable’? Many Religious people believe that God uses adversity to teach humans a lesson. They are uncertain whether or not it is God’s perfect will for them to be sick or healthy, poor or rich, troubled or at peace, in lack or enjoying abundance.
This is because most humans cannot handle wealth, and when they are healthy and everything is rosy, they forget about God – they don’t need Him. In fact, the Western Church really doesn’t need God. If they get sick, they go to the Doctor. If they are poor, they borrow more, and if they are depressed, they go to BIG Pharma. Let’s remember that pharmaceutical companies are not interested in cures, they are interested in customers… for life!
So, what I believe is a threat to the status quo. To many, I am a heretic.
But I think you may be a heretic too. If you agree that a human father who gives his children cancer to teach them something belongs behind bars, you and I are on the same page. God is the God of Light, the God of Love, and even the God of Laughter. He doesn’t make His children poor to teach them anything either. And He explicitly blesses us with peace. Through Jesus, He says, “My peace I give to you,” and that this is a, “peace that passes understanding.” He offers us rest and comfort by taking His yoke upon us and learning from Him. This is preceded with an invitation, “Come to me ALL you who are weary and burdened, and I WILL give you peace.”
Today, I want to share how you can become a HERO and thus take control of your emotional responses and the outcomes they lead to. You see, the way we feel most often leads, via a knee-jerk reaction to the results we get. I don’t want to be a jerk, not even a knee-jerk. I also don’t want to be my own worst enemy.
Here’s what normally happens:
Event + Reaction = Outcome
Something happens, you feel a certain way about this, you react on autopilot, and you get a result! Let me let you into a little secret that you’ve already experienced – it’s rarely a good result!
HEROes are different.
You begin with Humility – acknowledging you don’t know everything and that you’re still learning, and that you don’t always have to be right, and that you’re a work in progress.
Then the Events come flooding in.
Humility + Event
At this point, you’d normally have a set of default reactions to draw upon so that you don’t have to think about it too much. This was a great system in the days when hesitation meant you were going to be lunch for a predator! You seriously literally didn’t have time to think (i.e., Respond), no, you needed to React to survive, to live!
In the West, nowadays, not many Sabre-Toothed Tigers prowl the streets.
We need a better pattern.
There's more! Message me! Lex_McKee@me.com
The amazing story of Dave Ashley as he has moved from Fighter-Pilot to being Ace Athlete.
The story is adapted from, "101 Healing Stories for Kids and Teens - Using Metaphors in Therapy," by George W Burns (assumedly NOT the comedian!) Best to say the story remains their copyright!
I'd recommend the book IF you've got a very good magnifying glass to read the small print.
Stories have power to change our minds. In this story, a bad-tempered, hungry, and lonely Tyrannosaurus Rex learns how being wrapped up in his own problems is causing much sorrow to others... There is a happy ending, I promise!
Silent Seeds
When this is published, I will have just had my first day in full-time employment for decades. It will be a massive relief to close the door on activities that haven’t borne fruit – years of work with nothing to show for it.
…or is there nothing to show for it? I thought this new chapter would provide an elegant way to say, “No,” to the further investment of my time in daily video production. On the Friday before starting the new job, I fulfilled a promise to myself to create 90 videos, less than a minute long each. These videos have a single focus: an inspirational quote from one of the thinking giants of history. They’ve taken a lot of time and effort to produce – with no clear benefit to me other than proving to myself I can keep a promise. No, the benefit was focused on sharing value with the people who are kind enough to look at my Social Media feeds (LinkedIn and YouTube in this case).
I think Caroline’s tireless efforts at Moodscope are similar. Caroline is wonderful at finding a quote to go with each blog, and I don’t perceive any financial benefit in this activity for Caroline. That’s not what is motivating the generous investment of her time.
Thus, what I am about to say to myself, I say to Caroline, and I say to you: we don’t know the extent of the good we do. Our seeds are, for the most part, ‘silent seeds’.
I say, “for the most part,” because as soon as I’d decided to save time and stop producing daily inspirational posts, some of my seeds started talking back! I believe it is five people who have said to me this week how helpful they find the brief posts. One even said it had inspired him to have a go at video himself. Now I feel like I can’t stop sharing what inspires me. Do I have to do it daily? I think I do. I believe in ‘Daily Bread’ – fresh inspiration each and every day. So does Caroline.
Here’s an idea or two. Don’t be a silent seed. If you’ve benefited from Moodscope – explicitly tell Caroline – even if you’ve told her before. Let her know that her daily investment is paying off in your life. Secondly, have faith in your own silent seeds. Every bit of good you do – every kind word, every kind deed, every kind look – is a viable seed. You will most certainly never know the full extent of the good you’ve done but I can assure you that your kindness is bearing fruit.
We scatter seed on the ground…“Night and day, whether she|he sleeps or gets up, the seed sprouts and grows, though she|he does not know how. All by itself the soil produces grain – first the stalk, then the head, then the full kernel in the head…”
You can trust your seeds – every seed of kindness. Your job is not to check in on the seed. Your job is to have faith that, no matter how ‘silent’ your seeds are, they are growing. Don’t quit.
Diving for Pearls
We go through Life paddling, swimming, or diving. I awoke today realising I would benefit from reading some of a friend’s work on Motivation. I didn’t want to read a whole book – diving deep into this important topic. Am I lazy? It would’ve been more convenient for me to swim a bit in the content – perhaps watching some videos instead. Less time, less effort but also less reward.
I’m the same about many matters in Life… even those skills and areas I really care about. Take guitar, for example, I’ve been playing for 50 years! In truth, I’ve been swimming for 50 years – using the same skills over and over for 45 years in all likelihood. I’m OK, but I could be so much better. I do enough to (usually) get by and enjoy it. Software is the same – I’ll learn enough to get the result I want, but rarely will I dive deeper.
Here’s the real shocker: I’m a swimmer when it comes to mental wellbeing. I started to dive into a course with Kings College but it wasn’t water I enjoyed diving in.
I’ve got a friend called Oli who is a Diver. I think you know him! He dives for pearls. When we discuss mental wellbeing here in this blog, it is clear that he has dived deep into what makes us tick and continues to dive. It’s like it’s his vocation – his mission, his passion. And, like many other divers in this community, he brings up pearls from the deep to show and tell. Oh, and he’s a pretty ace guitarist.
Do I want to, “Be More Oli,”? Nope… I like Oli like he is, but I don’t want to be him. I want to be more me… with added twist of diligence for zest. I want to choose one or, at the most, two areas to go diving into. Am I lazy? I think I have been. So now the choice is to get less lazy and do the work necessary to go diving… but where?
The answer is almost irrelevant because this blog was secretly about you – secretly until now, that is! You can’t go diving all the time, so I’m certain you spend your life paddling, swimming, and occasionally diving. I’d like to know two things: where have you dived in the past (= in which areas are you an expert), and more exciting, where would you like to go diving in future? What would you like to explore in depth? Not necessarily for fame, fortune, or a career but because it would delight your soul to discover pearls in that place?
It’s OK to paddle and swim along most of the River of Life, but when that River reaches the Ocean, and you want the deeper rewards, you’ve got to dive for pearls.
This too shall…
What leapt to mind as your brain sought to finish that phrase? “This too shall…” For most of us, it would be “This too shall pass.”
That’s a great thought, and it can really help build resilience in the moment. But it’s not what I’ve got in mind today though… and it’s not how I want to live my life. It feels like, “this too shall pass,” means we are waiting… waiting for something better to come along to relieve us of the current distress or discomfort. I’d like to learn how to thrive in the here and now, not wait for the now and then.
Let’s add to the ‘This Too’ sayings.
Here’s my additional ‘This Too’ saying, “This too shall serve me.”
One of my sons has had a tough, few years. I remember his confusion and pain as, having been ‘let go’ from one position, (illegally, I might add), he could not find acceptance from another employer for over a year. The torment dragged on and on, but in the meantime, he pursued his passion for learning through academic studies. Eventually he found employment, then Covid hit. The resulting furlough gave him more time for his passion – paid time for his passion - more study. Then he was ‘let go’ again. Now, he’s doing a job that fits his strengths – that gives him purpose - and he’s engaging in even more study. The difficult time did pass but, on reflection, it also served him well. Add in the bonus of quality time with his young, growing family and you have to wonder whether it was a ‘bad’ time after all.
If he’d had the luxury of seeing his times of trial from his current position of prosperity, he would have breathed a sigh of relief… and would have been able to say with confidence, “This too shall pass.” But he would also have been able to say, “This too shall serve me.”
OK, let’s dispense with the naivety. Sometimes Life utterly crushes us and we don’t come out better on the ‘other side’ of the challenges. I’m not talking about those times. I’m talking about the majority of times where we do come through the hassle and we can look back with a perspective enriched by more information, more experience, and, crucially, an awareness of how we’ve used the difficult time to our advantage – we’ve made it serve us.
Today’s message is no more than this: to boldly assert in the face of difficult circumstances, “This, too, shall serve me.”
When we do this, we leave space for a shift in perception. Our awareness will begin to lock on to any evidence that the setback or suffering could serve us in the longer term. We make it work for us.
What I’d love to know is about the times in your own life when a setback turned into a strength – even a springboard or a stepping stone, when a stumbling block became a blessing.
Where you, too, could say…
“This, too, has served me.”
VIDEO: There's an informal video of this message, at a fascinating location, here: https://youtu.be/ZQxYlvU4NCM
Don't Feed the Wolf - Overcoming the Addiction to Anxiety
I realised the other week that I seem to be addicted to anxiety. If there is nothing to worry about, I worry about there being nothing to worry about, or I invent things to worry about.
Being addicted to a behaviour is less easy to recognise than substance abuse… and yet, here I am being abused by a repeated pattern of thinking. A tiny amount of research reveals that there is a vast range of addictions on offer. You and I can even become addicted to exercise… allegedly!
I wondered if there was anything to learn from the 12 Steps of the Alcoholics Anonymous model. It was surprisingly spiritual, which may make it unsuitable for Moodscope. However, it is clear that acknowledging the problem and having peer support are really important elements – as is the regularity of the meetings.
These strike me as elements already existing in the Moodscope Model (if there is one we can formalise.) We all acknowledge an issue, we have peer support via the buddies, blogs, and comments, and we can get support on a daily basis.
What fascinates me is the ‘ecology’ of any addiction. There is a positive gain that needs to remain even if the path to it is changed. I worry because it keeps me safe and makes sense of an often confusing and uncertain world. If I ask myself, “What would I rather have?” the answer is, “Peace of mind, and confidence in the future.” The quest thus becomes finding a more delightful path to peace of mind and future confidence (or hope!)
I’ve called out the problem and decided to change. I have a new goal – to seek peace and hope. I’ve got you here to support – and I occasionally get professional help. Is there anything else that can be done? I think there is: don’t feed the wolf.
I remembered that wonderful story of the Indian brave who was struggling with behaviour too. He asked his grandfather how he coped. His grandfather confessed he still had trouble with the very same behaviours. Grandfather said there were two wolves fighting inside him – one seeking a better set of behaviours and the other hell-bent on self-destruction.
“Which one is winning?” the young Brave asked.
“The one I feed the most,” answered his grandfather.
I hope this is helping others too. For me, I need to cut down on any stimulus – including human company - that feeds the anxiety. Then, with your support, maybe peace will prevail.
MOODSCOPE If you want help overcoming anxiety, look at www.moodscope.com - a non-judgmental supportive community for those facing up to depression, bipolar disorder, and anxiety.
Never underestimate the power you have to make someone's day.
A simple, selfless act of kindness can energise their resilience so that they can better face any challenges the day presents.
Credits... Music Sunny Days
Jimmy Gunnarsson - used under licence from Storyblocks.com
Image Image by Jill Wellington from Pixabay - used with permission
Focus on Business
The longest day in 2021, for us in the Northern Hemisphere, is the 21st June.
In Hampshire and Dorset, we’re fortunate to never be far away from farmland. Farmers understand well the importance of the Summer Solstice – the longest day. The 21st of June gives them the most light to see by in order to nurture their already developing crops.
Farmers understand “The Law of Harvest” and can teach us much about marketing our businesses.
Businesses are affected by “The Law of Harvest” just as much as our agriculture is. In marketing, for example, there’s a time to sow, a time to grow, and a time to reap. It’s a long game – well symbolised by the longest day – halfway through the Astronomical Year.
Of course, the Law of Harvest is not so obvious in business. We often expect quick wins in a way that any farmer would laugh at. What would you think of a Farmer who sowed yesterday and expected a harvest today?
Advertise once and you may expect new customer enquiries to come flooding in – instant fruit (or return on investment) from the seed you’ve sown. It can happen! We have some precedent that drives us to accept this illusion. For example, many students will cram before an exam – and get results! They may have bunked off all term and then suddenly got serious just before some key exam or assessment.
The problem is that cramming can work… allegedly. The issue is that they get their certificate but miss out on their education. The results don’t last. The results aren’t sustainable.
Instead, the wise student realises that their education is a long-game. Each idea, like a seed, must be nurtured by their own thinking before it can truly bear fruit in their experience. Sustainable results require sustained effort. In a similar way, effective marketing takes place over four seasons. It always has a Spring Season where the message is ‘sown’ in the marketplace for the first time. Summer Season follows up on the initial success of the seed springing up through the soil. The wise Marketing businessperson will give attention to the seed, nurturing it – nurturing those relationships - to grow strong and tall above the competition.
Then, after six months, the Autumn begins, bringing us the Season of Mellow Fruitfulness. And Winter, which may seem quiet, is nevertheless spent in preparation for the next Spring.
Sow your brand-seeds through print and social media, then be like the Farmer and give those seeds strong support until the fruit begins to be harvested. Then keep up your efforts so that new seeds in fresh soil will give you harvest after harvest after harvest.
Print, promote, rinse, and repeat! This is The Law of The Harvest.
Hi, I’m Lex – Lex McKee – who writes one half of the “Focus on Wellness” column for Focus Magazines and the Monday Moodscope blog for Moodscope.
Today’s topic is: I Think Therefore I Feel
I wonder if René Descartes would be gracious enough for me to adapt his famous, “I think, therefore I am”? His was a way to prove our existence. Mine is a way to improve our experience of our existence. Why? Because our thinking often drives the way we feel.
I was having a complete hissy-fit the other day, a bad mood that grew progressively worse. “Could it be,” I thought to myself, “that moods are purely chemical?” If so, my thinking was agitating those chemicals!
A little Internet surfing seemed to confirm that every emotion is a complex cocktail of chemicals rushing through the bloodstream. How are these chemicals triggered? They are triggered by our reaction or our response to a stimulus. If something makes us jump, the “fear” emotional reaction is necessarily fast – leaving no time to think before the cocktail is released. However, in most circumstances, we have time to think, we have time to respond, and thus have time to change how we feel.
Feeling cross was a real downer, something I want to learn to influence even if I can’t quite control it. It was therefore interesting to be reminded of the contribution Edward de Bono has made to improving our thinking. Edward died on the 9th June – a great loss to the world of thinking.
One of Edward’s most famous techniques is “Six Thinking Hats.” Playing on the idea of, “Putting on our Thinking Cap,” de Bono suggested we would have a better experience of life if we learned “Parallel Thinking” – to think in multiple ways. He asked us to put on one Thinking Hat at a time. We put on the White Hat to think about facts and to use our powers of logic. The Black Hat is the one to wear when thinking about what could go wrong – the worst-case scenario. To balance this with optimism – the best-case scenario - he said to wear the Yellow Hat. To create options, alternatives, and possibilities, we put on the Green Hat. The Blue Hat is the management hat, put on to lead and organise the thinking process. But by far my favourite is the Red Hat which allows us to express our emotions without needing any argument to justify them.
Returning to my hissy-fit, a wise friend would let me keep the Red Hat on for a few minutes while I ranted and vented! They could then ask me to put on the Black Hat to exaggerate the worst-case scenario (i.e. “The day was ruined, I wouldn’t get any work done!”)
Rant and gloom and doom over, I could put on the White Hat to calmly look at the facts.
After this, the Yellow Hat would help me think through the best-case, and the Green Hat would facilitate the generation of positive options to improve the day. Finally, the Blue Hat would help me organise what to do next.
Frankly, it’s cute even if over-complex for most situations, but it made me think… …and the more I thought about it, the calmer I became. Surprise, surprise – I ended up having a pretty good day. I think, therefore I feel.
Music Credit: Documentary Ambient Background Danail Draganov Used under licence from Storyblocks.com
Image Credit: Photo Mix from Pixabay - used with permission
For Today
Yesterday, I ‘sprung’ Dad from 8 days and nights in a hospital stroke ward. His care was exemplary but accompanied with the necessary indignities of hospital life. He’d had a mini-stroke, an embolic shower – as they call it, and his recovery was rapid - thankfully. However, it’s a massive warning for us all, and the future will be filled with blood-thinners and eight other pills, potions, and inhalers that will keep his heart rate more stable and his brain stroke free.
That nicely sets the scene for what came next: gratitude for today.
When we picked Dad up, we asked him what he wanted. He was crystal clear: a proper cup-of-tea, a two-hour shower, a decent night’s sleep, and… crispy prawns in sweet chilli sauce!
The latter one was the only challenge. Marks and Spencer’s Food Hall was an immediate ‘fail’ and it looked like Waitrose was going to get nul points too! Gratitude flowed when I finally found the desired dish (as I’d wondered to myself whether I could face Sainsbury too if Waitrose joined the UK in that famous dreaded Eurovision phrase.)
This is an emotional time for the family. We naturally reflect and ask ourselves, “What is truly important?” For Dad, what is appreciated is quite ‘small’ on the grand scale of things. He’d forgotten to mention good music. He lives his life wrapped in the most magnificent classical music cocoon. After a season with Haydn, Beethoven, and, of course, Mozart, he emerges reborn.
This has been a very long build up to a very simple call to thought. What small things are important to you? 8 days of deprivation was enough for Dad to become clear on the niceties of life that make each day sing. For me, it’s the shower, the posh coffee, privacy, quiet, creative freedom, wine, Icelandic wheat beer, olives, good cheese, time freedom… nothing here to make anyone say, “Wow, what a guy!” It is mainly simple stuff that I’ve come to cherish.
What would be on your list?
In addition, two BIG shifts have happened for us.
The first BIG thing for me was an instant hike in my gratitude levels. EVERY cup of coffee using my favourite brand (with cream) is now a celebration. EACH moment in the shower – with my Goats’ Milk Soap – a cause for rejoicing. EVERY sip of my favourite beer or wine. EVERY moment of quiet or privacy…
The second ENORMOUS thing was a re-assessment of time. Mum’s gone. Dad nearly went. We’ve got friends and family facing life-limiting illnesses and there seems to be loss all around us. The long-term plans are diminishing in importance. In their place, there is a bright and joyful focus on commitment to and gratitude for today.
Image credit: Alexas Fotos on Pixabay.com Music credits: Storyblocks.com - "Wistful Thinking," by Lance Conrad. And "Soft Emotional Piano Quiet Storm," by unlisted artist.
What will you do today that your future self will thank you for? One action is certain: the decisions you make. What you decide today will lighten or darken your future. We've all make poor choices from time to time but those choices were based upon incomplete knowledge. Hindsight is the luxury of those who possess more knowledge after the event.
We may not have foreknowledge of the future, but by adjusting the frames we use for foresight, we can improve our decision making and thus build a better, brighter, bolder, bigger future.
The video related to this topic is here: https://youtu.be/Ic1OwF6UOCw
Song credit. Music is used under licence from Storyblocks.com "Summer Tropical Pop," by Kamil Guszczynski
Enjoy this inspirational podcast intended to help you and I break out of a bad mood and access, instead, a positive state of feeling good!
Links to my two bouncy songs: Links:
Justin: https://youtu.be/ru0K8uYEZWw John: https://youtu.be/iEEuG5XML-A
Image Credit: Image by Digital Photo and Design DigiPD.com Pixabay
https://www.moodscope.com/welcome is a powerfully supportive and affirming resource for those dealing with the challenges of good mental health. I have take the 20 Moodscope Cards and their descriptors and created Mental-Health-Friendly Affirmations.
Lowering my voice, here are those affirmations recorded to provoke the ASMR effect.
This gentle recording is my second iteration of experimenting with seeking the ASMR effect. I hope you like it.
Best said: this is deeply relaxing. Please don't listen to it while your attention is required on anything else. This is especially so of driving or operating machinery.
Adults Only
There’s a story or three to this week that I’d love to share with you. For example, how did I inadvertently get my first 18+ rating on YouTube? How did I discover the wealth of wisdom in a new friendship? And how did ‘coincidence’ suggest I begin working on ASMR Affirmations for Moodscope?
Let’s begin with a new mantra that I learned from deepening a friendship: “What will I do today that my Future-Self will thank me for?”
This arose from a series of serendipitous events. I’ve not been having a proper day off – clear of technology. By last Wednesday, my innermost being had had enough. I was invited to go for a walk near Worth Matravers – my home for many years. With road works outside the house, I figured my chances of getting any voice over work recorded were slim… so I went for a walk 3x longer than my goal, with ups and downs that covered the equivalent of 27 floors!
The walk was exhausting and exhilarating! Breathless for much of it, I made the decision to listen to author Lee Groombridge, who has written an excellent short book on resilience. “What will I do today that my Future-Self will thank me for?” comes from Lee.
My Future-Self thanked me for the walk and the deeper friendship… though my physical self wasn’t too happy with me for the following 48 hours!
A week earlier, I had recorded the waves by Boscombe Pier using slow motion video. This post had received positive responses from some viewers, and one mentioned the hunger on YouTube for ASMR. This is a form of quiet speaking and other sounds that can provoke a deeply pleasant response. Inspired, I rewrote the Moodscope statements as affirmations and whispered them over some new footage I had captured of clouds passing overhead – the Cloud Whisperer or Wellbeing Whisperer.
I didn’t like it. Penelope confirmed my worst fears when she said the whispering sounded creepy! This morning I’ve re-recorded it using quiet speaking rather than whispering. You can see the new video here…
https://youtu.be/Jhqa6jisxUU
Inspired once more to take time out, Penelope and I went to Sculpture by the Lakes near Dorchester. This is a mixture of indoor and outdoor sculpture set in acres of lakeside gardens. It features many works by Simon Gudgeon as well as work from 30 of the UK’s most celebrated sculptors. The works are magnificent.
And this is how I got my first 18+ rating on YouTube. Let me say that the art is occasionally of an adult nature. In fact, no children or dogs are allowed into the gardens. Like Adam and Eve, some of the works don’t even need clothing! YouTube thought my video unsuitable for young eyes, and thus I learn another lesson. However, my Future-Self thanks me for going there and for capturing the memories on film!
The spooky thing is that a friend bumped into us there and suggested I did… ASMR recordings! When the ‘Universe’ works so serendipitously, it’s good to listen…
Here's a video version of this Podcast: https://youtu.be/4gdVHA_gjeI
Primarily written for my Christian listeners, this is an inspirational and spiritual podcast on being bold about applying your talents to being successful.
British people are famous for not talking about their talents because, culturally, it is regarded as 'boasting'. God has no such reticence! You are meant to prosper, to success, to be fruitful and multiply. In fact, if you don't, you may well be in for a shock!
Explore with me how "Parts Integration" - a technique used by therapists and others who understand Neuro-Linguistic Programming - can help you move from internal conflict (and thus unhappiness) through to feeling more whole.
Working with my therapist, Kim Searle, I have experienced many breakthroughs. This podcast shares how my Inner Critic has been transformed into my new hero: TruthSayer - the LieSlayer!
Novelty
“Novelty,” is a wonderful word with an even more wonderful gift in store for us. It’s based on the Old French, “novelete,” meaning, “innovation,” and, “newness,” and, “new fashion.”
It also means something unusual or new… and it means good news for mental wellbeing. Why? Because our prefrontal cortex - in that wrinkly bit of the brain - craves novelty.
I’m a bit torn with this blog in that there are way more serious problems going on in the world at the moment, way more serious problems than… boredom. But boredom is an enemy of good mental health. Whilst it may seem like a First World Problem, it’s a worldwide Human problem. Our psychological wellbeing is a bit fussy. It demands stability on the one hand AND novelty on the other! Too much novelty and we quickly feel overwhelmed. Too much boredom and our motivation dissipates, and our energy disappears.
The issue for me is that I haven’t felt ‘excited’ for way over a year! I’ve been creative, I’ve been interested, some really nice things have happened… but there’s been no excitement. Excitement is energy for me. Is it the same for you?
Thinking about this, I wondered what stimulates ‘excitement’ for most of us. Novelty is high on what triggers excitement for me. Then, the other night, we had an experience that made everything a lot clearer. We’ve got a wildlife camera that captures some of the adventures our local hedgehogs get up to in the dark. This is interesting.
The other evening, I put the camera out late and disturbed one of the hedgehogs who was already eating. Popping the camera down, I withdrew enough for the hedgehog to relax and to continue with its activities. Watching the hedgehog ‘live’ was exciting! Watching the hedgehogs on camera is only interesting. You had to be there to enjoy the excitement!
I realise that excitement is ‘now’ – in the present. It’s a ‘live’ experience. It’s not past and it’s not often future. And excitement requires ‘being there’ – ideally in an engaged state participating in the events. I say it is not often future, but there is an exception – anticipation. Anticipation is an important aspect of excitement. The journey to the holiday can be exciting too. The quiet before the curtains open up on a show or concert can be electrifying and exciting.
You know all this. Why am I mentioning it?
I believe pursuing some excitement will do you and me the power of good over the coming weeks. I was curious about what you get excited about and was keen to stir us all up to actively pursuing what we find exciting as soon as possible.
So, spill the beans! What counts as ‘exciting’ in your life? When are you next expecting to enjoy that excitement? For me, it needs to be a novelty. New food. New locations. New friends. New customers. New projects. New clothes (though not the Emperor’s!)
Overcoming the Dragon of Boredom
This story is taken from the mythical book of Covidicus (pronounced ‘Covid-i-curse’).
In the years of the pandemic, a new foe spread its wings and took flight to overshadow our lands – the Dragon of Boredom.
You are the hero of our story if you have suffered from Boredom’s affliction over these long months. It’s time for you to rise and conquer!
To defeat the Dragon and to overcome boredom, you will benefit from the help of a friend of mine, the Wizard of Poz. Let’s go and have a chat with him…
“Ah,” says the Wizard of Poz, I was expecting you! And, I can see you have had the look of the Curse of Boredom far too often on your face this year! Let me encourage you!”
“I have in my possession, powerful armour that can help you defeat the dragon.”
“First, we must make sure you are not caught unawares – what’s sometimes described as being caught with your trousers down! You will need a belt! Here, I have The Belt of Motivation! I perceive that you may not fully know your own strength, so I have a powerful profile you can take to discover what energises you! This is the first defence against the Dragon of Boredom!”
“Secondly, you’ll benefit from wearing this breastplate, The Breastplate of Purpose! Discovering your Purpose in Life will protect your heart from the attacks of Boredom. I know you know that the word ‘Courage’ comes from the heart. In fact, as my old drinking buddy, Friedrich Nietzsche used to say, “He who has a ‘Why’ can bear almost any ‘How’.”
If you’re like me, you’re now thinking, “How can I discover my Life’s Purpose?” This is where one-to-one coaching is so worthwhile. I work with three transformational coaches to gain more clarity of focus. Alphabetically, Jules Whale, Kay Harrington, and Kim Searle. Even though I’ve known my Purpose since I was 18 years of age, I haven’t always kept track of how to live out that Purpose. That’s where coaching comes in.
Returning to the Wizard of Poz…
“Thirdly, let’s have a look at your feet! Ah, it’s as I thought it would be. You haven’t been moving enough. Your armour must include shoes ready to move, shoes fit for purpose because boredom loves it when you sit still in front of the computer for far too long. Put on The Shoes of Movement! You’ve got to move it! Get more exercise! Get outside! Get some rays of sunshine – boredom hates sunshine. Darkness hates the light.”
“Fourthly, that Dragon breathes fire… the Fire of Boredom. You will need a special shield, The Shield of Curiosity! Curiosity will overcome the Flames of Boredom every time. You must learn to discover something fascinating everywhere you go, and in everything you do.”
“Fifthly, you will need a helmet to protect your mind and your vision. Take this helmet, The Helmet of Focus. Keep finding the next physical action you can take to move you forward in each situation, and you will never lose your way.”
“Sixthly, finally, I give you a dangerous offensive weapon: The Sword of Affirmation! Beware! This sword is double-edged, it can cut you as easily as you can pierce the hide of The Dragon of Boredom. You must learn to wield this sword wisely. This means learning to be cautious about how you speak. If you say, ‘I am…’ and add something negative about yourself, your circumstances, and your future, the sword will pierce your own soul! But if you learn to say positive things about who you are, how your circumstances are changing for the better, and how you have a bright future, The Sword of Affirmation will pierce the dragon through and send it fleeing from you in terror!”
More...
Heroic Imperfect
I’d like to invent the Heroic Imperfect Tense! This is the active state where you and I become progressively more vivacious and satisfying versions of ourselves without needing to be perfect at any point along the journey. As a plaque I have puts it so well: “Flawesome!”
It would be a tense used that conveys we are perfectly OK with not being perfectly OK!
I watched the silly film, “Shazam!” last night… and loved it! Spoiler alert! It’s a 14-year-old boy who gets gifted with Superhero powers which manifest themselves in the form of an adult body. Yes, a 14-year-old’s mind, values, and experience suddenly given super-powers and looking like an adult. What would you do?
You don’t need to imagine the chaos that follows… watch the film – it’s a real ‘feel-good’ treat.
The key joy in this film for me was Billy/or/Shazam’s lack of perfection. The character is a Flawesome work-in-progress, and all the more interesting for this. He’s a troubled soul that finds a way to do something he’s proud of. In the process, he discovers himself and what he truly values.
I don’t want to be a superhero, but I do want to have a life I’m progressively more satisfied with. “Heroic,” is probably too much too but I’d like to do well! Caroline is brilliant at finding the right quote for the blog each day at Moodscope, so I thought I’d learn from her and share three gems that resonated with me.
Benjamin Disraeli said, “Nurture your mind with great thoughts. To believe in the heroic makes heroes.” (Lex said, “Start with watching ‘Shazam!’”)
Theodore Roosevelt said, “Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.”
Frankly, I think we are uncomfortable around those who are too perfect. They do not compare favourably with most people’s self-image. Let me close then with what I thought was an insightful quote from Edward Everett Hale:
“I cannot do everything, but still, I can do something. And because I cannot do everything, I will not refuse to do the something that I can do.”
May you have an inspiring day where you find the motivation and means and opportunity to do something imperfectly heroic!
[Image Credit: Andrew Martin from Pixabay]
The Man with Two Brains
“The Man with Two Brains,” is a comedy movie starring Steve Martin and, largely, the voice of Kathleen Turner, released in 1983. It’s silly but fun.
Last week, I finally got down to reading a book a friend had loaned me a long time ago. It’s called, “Turbo Success,” and was published in 1993. To be honest, I didn’t read it until last week because I’m tired of Self-Help ‘Success’ books. Why? Because, I may be a special case, but they don’t seem to work for me!
This one had something different and reminded us of having two brains (at least!) Ron Holland, the author, focuses very much on the Verbal Brain and the Visual Brain. His assertion is that our positive intentions – our dreams and ambitions – have to enlist the help of both brains. If we have positive affirmations, that takes care of the Verbal Brain. But if what we are seeing with the mind’s eye doesn’t match what we are saying, he says the mental pictures will take precedence.
This could be nonsense! However, it did highlight that I wasn’t investing time in imagining the better future I often talk about. In fact, my images of the future have been pretty grim! It’s been great to begin to change what I’d unwittingly been visualising.
Bluntly, when one is feeling low, having ‘positive’ people round can be… …irritating! I’d like to be upbeat today without being overwhelmingly or unrealistically positive. Let’s think in terms of ‘possibilities’ instead.
One of the possible changes I’d like in the future is to have a home of my own that I own – debt free. The affirmation just rolls off my tongue now, but there was no visualisation. That was easy to change. A couple of years ago, we stayed in my dream house – Pengwyn near Tintagel, in Cornwall. I took some photos! It’s been a simple matter to go back and revisit those images. The key, Ron says, is to see yourself in the visualisation. Just looking at the pictures is too passive – we need to be acting in our own visualisations. In response, I’ve been imagining opening the gate… walking down the steps… entering the front door… sitting at the kitchen table… you get the picture! If it never works, it’s been lovely to imagine and to remember.
Does it work? Time will tell, but it does make sense for all of us to think that we have two brains, and that when they work together, we get better results faster than when they are at odds with one another. If you’d like a happier future – what does that look like? I’ll close with a great quote I saw in a Garden Centre: “If you have a library and a garden, you have everything you need,” Marcus Tullius Cicero. Guess what else I’ve been visualising!
Signing out then, as, “The Man with Two Brains…” at least!
Our Financial Advisor loaned us a book by Ron G Holland, "Turbo Success - How to Reprogram the Human Biocomputer." It's sat on my shelf for well over a year. Wish I'd read it sooner! The content of this inspirational podcast has largely been inspired by Ron's writing. Although the book was published in 1993, it has already delivered some breakthrough distinctions I really should have known years ago. I hope it works for you too.
Credits: Image from Freepik.com Artist: sarayut_w32
Prophecy – Creating Your Future – an inspirational podcast with Lex McKee
One of my favourite wisdom sayings is the answer to the question, “When is the best time to plant a tree?” The answer is, “Twenty years ago.” The next question is, “OK, so when is the second-best time to plant a tree?” The answer, of course, is, “Today!”
Seeds growing through to fruition fascinate me. So do dreams. My dreams at night are surreal. Nevertheless, I can usually trace the ‘seed’ of each surreal element back to something I’d been thinking about during that day. My thoughts created the basic elements for my dream.
This has convinced me that what we think about, or what we say, and what we do become the essential elements of what we become. What we think|say|do today will be the tree of tomorrow – our future selves. In this sense, the think|say|do combination is a prophecy – more a forthtelling than a foretelling, or perhaps a mix of the two.
If I have a part to play in creating my dreams of the night, why wouldn’t it be true that I have a part to play (though not total control) of creating my dreams in Life?
The Life I am living today is the ‘fruit’ of the ‘seeds’ I planted, if not yesterday, perhaps even twenty years ago. I know, through therapy, that much of what I’m living today was planted fifty-five to sixty years ago! Therapeutic gardening of the mind requires weeding as well as planting! Pruning as well as nurturing!
And if it is true that I have a part to play in creating the Life of my dreams, what could I think today, what could I say today, and what could I do today to create a better tomorrow?
I’ve been videoing an insightful professional psychotherapist. In the first video, “Overcoming Depression,” he offers many practical ways to move forward. None of them are big steps. His core message is ‘movement’ – if you are stuck, move! Do something simple. His examples include baking a cake, mowing the lawn, doing the washing up, walking the dog… tiny, easy, physical movements. Each of these becomes a seed to grow into a more confident person who begins to feel greater degrees of freedom.
One of the great values in taking tiny steps is that, if there is a setback, it’s just a step back – a tiny step back to reset our expectations, learn, then try something else.
Holding on to the thought that what we think, say, and do today will influence the future, what would you choose to think, to say, and to do today to head in a direction you’d prefer?
What small steps will you take today?
Perhaps, in part, we can prophesy our own future…
Credits: Image - Wisanu Nuu on Freepik.com Music - James Grant "Ambient Voiceover 1" on Storyblocks.com
Spring Offers
Spring offers us in the UK many moments for positive reflection and renewed hope. Three weeks ago, I was looking at how dull the back ‘lawn’ looked. It hadn’t grown over Winter and had been beaten down by workers rebuilding the fence. If a lawn can look neglected and dejected, it did. Then something magical happened…
Overnight, daisies began appearing in encouraging numbers. I thought to myself, “Who told the daisies?” meaning, “Who told the daisies it is time to thrive again?” What was the signal?
“What a difference a day makes,” says the song. Since then, I’ve had more ‘moments’ with Snowdrops and Camellias, Daffodils and Celandines, Cherry Blossom, Grape Hyacinths, and now the Magnolias and Blackthorn blossom. They all ‘know’ something. The Rooks are rowdy and busy building. The Blackbirds and Sparrows are raiding the garden for nesting materials. It’s clear that Spring is offering them a strong message that it’s time to get busy. And, of course, the birds sing their thanks in increasing numbers and volume levels each dawn.
Especially exciting for us, our resident hedgehog is awake and active and on camera again!
I have a new thought for you… at least a thought new to me. I wondered if I was hearing Spring’s offer of something new too. Humans are often detached observers of the Seasons changing rather than active participants in each new chapter. Those who participate will do things like ‘Spring Cleaning’ and the Garden Centres begin to thrive with the sale of new seeds, plants, and fixtures to cheer up the gardens.
Thus, my question is to both you and to me: are we going to participate? If the answer is, “Yes!” I’d love to know what are your Springtime activities that bring you hope and energy.
And for those readers who are at the start of their Autumn Season, what changes are you enjoying?
Thank You! If you'd like to say, "Thank You!" and fund the increased production of resources like this, you can support my work here: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/lexmckee
Imagine if Batman tried to live his life as if he was living out Superman's adventure. The consequences would be pretty dire.
Too many of us spend our lives trying to live up to other people's expections, to live out the adventure they think we should enact. The consequences can be pretty dire.
We must choose our own adventure.
Thank You! If you'd like to say, "Thank You!" and fund the increased production of resources like this, you can support my work here: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/lexmckee
Many good people have had over a year of setbacks because of circumstances beyond their control.
When we 'feel' unproductive, it is all too easy to attach our worth to our earnings, and then, when wealth no longer flows as a direct consequence of effort, to doubt our talents.
This message reaffirms the fact that you have a unique talent - maybe even more than one. You are NOT the problem.
Current unfruitfulness may be for many reasons:
Wrong Soil Wrong method of Sowing Wrong Season Wrong Strategy The message is that you are OK. Your talent is valid and viable. Your circumstances need to change.
Thank You! If you'd like to say, "Thank You!" and fund the increased production of resources like this, you can support my work here: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/lexmckee
The Art of Eating Frogs
What is the best way to eat frogs? Whilst I am certain there are some excellent recipes, my two answers in this message begin with this one: in small bites.
The metaphor is used in time management training to refer to tasks we don’t want to do. Erroneously ascribed to Mark Twain, the quote is, “If it’s your job to eat a frog, it’s best to do it first thing in the morning. And if it’s your job to eat two frogs, it’s best to eat the biggest one first.”
In other words, get the distasteful tasks done first, and attack the biggest challenge first.
I’ve been eating three bullfrogs recently. One of the most distasteful ones is my accounts. This is a tadpole I leave alone all year, waiting for it to grow enormous, and then I try to eat it all at once. The sensible members amongst us will say, “Eat it in small bites! If you do your accounts each week, or even each month, you could avoid all this misery!” And they’d be right. Yet, still, I procrastinate.
My second answer is my favourite. If you’re going to eat a frog, add some delicious side dishes!
There I was, suffering. Then the thought came to me, “Listen to some music.” I love music and I believe a part of me didn’t want music on in the background in case the bad taste of the accounts spoiled my great taste in music.
I obeyed the inner voice, and, for a while, my experience of trudging through the accounts changed into more of a dance. The choice of music turned out to be mission critical. The best music for turning eating accounts into an art form was Nouveau Flamenco and relaxing harp music. If you’re open to recommendations, I’d suggest Marc Antoine – a French Nouveau Flamenco player, and, “Harp Music – Soft, Beautiful, Relaxing, and Healing Songs,” by, I think, “The Harp of Love.”
The impact of dreamy harp music reminded me of the story of King Saul – who was troubled by mental torment. The only relief he got was when David played the harp. Accounts, for me, are frogs of torment – a plague of them. Harp triumphs over torment!
Here’s the BIG thought. The Harp music was already ‘charged’ for me with positive associations of a peaceful state of mind. When I played it at the same time as eating the accounts, the sense of peace stored in the harp music was stronger than the sense of disgust experienced in the accounting. I realised that I could borrow from the stored power of the harp to transform the energy drain of the accounts.
And here’s my question to you: where do you borrow energy from to feel better when facing up to something you’d prefer not to do?
Does music work for you too? Or is it something else?
IMAGE CREDIT: Stephen Hocking on Unsplash
Thank You! If you'd like to say, "Thank You!" and fund the increased production of resources like this, you can support my work here: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/lexmckee
Food for the Soul
Last week, I shared a message about choosing The Road More Scenic. This week, I’d like to share my surprise when ‘scenic’ can be synonymous with ‘intentionally different’. Whilst there are many beauty spots in Poole, Dorset, Stanley Green Road isn’t one of them! It was, however, an alternative way to my destination, so I took it.
They say, “A change is as good as a rest,” but sometimes a change is as good as a wake-up call. Coming round the corner, hungry after an early visit to the Dentist, I noticed, “Rob’s Filling Station.” This is a play on words because Rob’s Street Food outlet is part of a complex of automotive industrial units.
I asked Rob if he was OK with old-fashioned cash. “Oh, yes!” he declared, and went on to explain the punitive costs of accepting cards. He expanded, explaining that even if people didn’t have cash, he trusted them to bring it later on… and, if they were so desperate for food that they didn’t pay, he said, “I say ‘let them have it!’” I smelt a story! Clearly, Rob wasn’t in this for the money.
I said, “There’s a story there, isn’t there?”
Without hesitation, Rob explained how his 17-year-old son had died in his Mother’s arms from an aortic inherited problem. He confessed that they shouldn’t have had children as his wife’s life expectancy was 32 years because of the same health issue, though, thankfully, she is still going strong in her 50s. The 17 years with his son were all amazing and he valued every one of them.
Rob has used his experience and suffering to re-evaluate what is important in life. Aside from delivering food for the soul alongside the most magnificent Street Food, he has been instrumental in providing opportunities for others. These include setting several disadvantaged connections up in business and being in influencer in raising awareness and attracting the funding for a World Leading centre for Laparoscopic and Robotic surgery here in Poole. That’s a longer story!
Who knows what good souls and great stories await us when we deviate from our habitual ways and discover the new. I was shocked, humbled, and delighted to have met Rob and ‘Uncle Mark’ his brother-in-law. Thus, I shall be returning to record their story so that more people can experience an attitude that I covet.
Rob has an attitude of gratitude for every day. Every day is a bonus. Money is merely a means to make a difference, and there is much ‘difference’ to make in the World. I try to be grateful but have to work at it… Rob’s a ‘natural’! I left inspired as much by his food for thought, his food for the soul, as by his delicious dishes.
Thank You! If you'd like to say, "Thank You!" and fund the increased production of resources like this, you can support my work here: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/lexmckee
The Road More Scenic
Roads are often used as a powerful metaphor for our life’s journey. M Scott Peck wrote the famous, “The Road Less Travelled.” Robert Frost wrote a favourite poem of mine, “The Road Not Taken.” https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/44272/the-road-not-taken
But I’ve chosen a different road that I’d like to share with you. It’s the longer way to go, which I call, “The Road More Scenic.” I can share more with you if you watch the short 4 minute relaxation video I recorded. https://youtu.be/E6OIAUSZkVM
On business that took me to Woodfalls in the New Forest last week, I deliberately took the Scenic Route allowing me the joy of the Avenue of Beech Trees at Moor Crichel (twice) as well as part of the Avenue of Beech Trees at Badbury Rings (twice though not shown on the video.)
I suspect 25 minutes was added to my journey (with Lady Penelope riding shotgun). In return for that investment, my spirit and soul were fed, and my body too with a picnic in the car in the pouring rain outside St James' Church, Alderholt... magic (thought sad that St James is no longer, "Open for Prayer.")
Other high points include the Pyramid of Moss and Brick near Hale Park House - I have no idea what this fascinating construction is for. Perhaps you can guess if you watch the video.
Breamore Mill - stunningly squatting beside the River Avon and astride the mill race. The lit Christmas Tree was a nice touch too.
The Tree of Life and Hope at Wimborne St Giles (my title... they may just call it, "Bob," or, "Uncle.")
Ten thousand Snowdrops and enough Mistletoe to bruise your lips for a Century. I’ve never seen so much Mistletoe.
En passant, spotting of the ruined Knowlton Church and the Philosopher's Tower (also not featured), Dorset landmarks dipped in history.
To conclude, the Norman bridge at White Mill, over the River Stour, which is likely to be the oldest bridge in Dorset. On this day, the Stour swollen by so many showers… a raging, rushing, river commuting to the sea.
Then there were Egrets. Egrets? I've had a few...
My point? Enjoy the journey... the destination may be a bit grim and final.
On our route we were overtaken several times by drivers clearly in more of a hurry... but for what?
Press Pause and enjoy the journey.
Now, it’s your turn. What treasures do you delight in when you go out of your way to take The Road More Scenic?
[And if you fancy another uplifting bonus, check out this gorgeous song by Darrell Scott, “And The River Is Me.” https://youtu.be/ZieYi8t_m3M ]
I look forward to reading about your treasures.
Thank You! If you'd like to say, "Thank You!" and fund the increased production of resources like this, you can support my work here: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/lexmckee
I've been a Moodscope User - a member of the community at www.moodscope.com - for years. Why? Because I regularly have to take decisive action to maintain a state of good cheer and good courage.
Arrayed against me are formidable foes, who sometimes seem invincible... but they aren't. They are pointing in the wrong direction! The main driving force of my life is towards inner peace, harmony, and mood mastery. And I have formidable friends working towards this with me. Their names are Mr Interested, Lady Inspired, Professor Excited, Sir Active, Mrs Determined, Dr Strong, Lord Proud, Rev Enthusiastic, Ms Alert, and Team Attentive!
By strengthening just a single one of my allies, I can win the day. Equally, by weakening just a single one of my foes, I can with the day. You can too. You can join the battle and win. Moodscope is here to help you. The test enables you to understand where you are starting from today, and make an informed decision as to how you will improve your position as you move towards Emotional Mastery.
Thank You! If you'd like to say, "Thank You!" and fund the increased production of resources like this, you can support my work here: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/lexmckee
Storytelling is the cornerstone of Civilisation and Society. Our stories define us. They also dictate the future. When Dr Martin Luther King Jnr shared the famous, "I have a dream..." speech, he told us a credible story of what a better world would be like, a world we could play our part in co-creating. What the world needs now, is love, sweet love - of course - but what the world needs more is better stories we can see ourselves playing out part in bringing to pass.
Thank You! If you'd like to say, "Thank You!" and fund the increased production of resources like this, you can support my work here: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/lexmckee
Working hard for something you desire is both good and rewarding. Too much success on this path, however, can lead to an exaggerated sense of control. It's a cause and effect thing where hard work always leads to success. This is not the whole truth. There is a deeper magic where you can allow the Universe to gift you success in response to slowing down, becoming quiet, and listening to the voice of Wisdom.
Thank You! If you'd like to say, "Thank You!" and fund the increased production of resources like this, you can support my work here: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/lexmckee
I've recorded the Biblical Book of Ruth at this time for three reasons. Firstly, it's National Storytelling Week, and this is a personal favourite. Secondly, it celebrates an exalted form of love, Chesed, which is so rich in interpretation that no one word or phrase in English is sufficient to the task. It is loyal love, a covenant love, an enduring love, a love that never fails. Thirdly, Ruth demonstrates the importance of seeing oneself as part of a bigger plan. She is an ancestor of King David, and thus vital to that timeline... in fact, David was born what appears to be 300 years later. When we face troubles, as the whole world is doing today, it is important to "think longer" and to see the current darkness as a blip that will pass. My Dad will never forget the War but it did pass and it is now seen in the context of a much longer time frame. Our children who have been most affected by this year (so far) of confinement will feel like it fills their whole life. It doesn't, but it will take them time to realise that. This too shall pass.
Ruth went through times of great loss, great sorrow, and great suffering... but within a larger time-frame, we hear how everything works out to the good.
There is hope.
Credits Photo by Shalitha Dissanayaka on Unsplash
Thank You! If you'd like to say, "Thank You!" and fund the increased production of resources like this, you can support my work here: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/lexmckee
For my 60th birthday, my friend, Emotional Master - Kim Searle, sent me a wooden plaque on which was written a new adjective: "Flawsome"
Someone who is "Flawsome" knows they are flawed but also embraces not only their flaws but also their awesomeness - hence "Flawsome"!
Learn how this sits beside the Japanese concepts of Wabi-Sabi and Kintsugi to offer all of flawed human beings hope for the future.
This story is the copyright of Claude M Steiner (1969)
Originally a video, the slightly speeded up version is here on YouTube: https://youtu.be/QDiWyKTD0sQ
I promised my friend, Chris Muirhead, that I would read the story of, "The Warm Fuzzy Tale."
I first came across this story when learning about Transactional Analysis. Transactional Analysis does exactly what the name suggests, it analyses the [communication] transactions between people. We all love to feel warm and fuzzy after a good conversation, and thus this is what the story is about. However, it's MUCH deeper than that and if I explained it, I'd ruin the magic (a bit like a magician showing how she|he did it!)
Listen, then, to the story, and let it touch you in a way that is unique to you.
It would great if you then reach out to friends who give you Warm Fuzzies to say, "Thank You!" and even to give them a Warm Fuzzy!
Full blog transcript can be found here: https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/become-key-person-excellence-lex-mckee-the-cheerful-leader-
A Prayer by Moses, the man of God. Lord, you have been our dwelling place for all generations. Before the mountains were born, before you had formed the earth and the world, even from everlasting to everlasting, you are God. You turn man to destruction, saying, “Return, you children of men.” For a thousand years in your sight are just like yesterday when it is past, like a watch in the night. You sweep them away as they sleep. In the morning they sprout like new grass. In the morning it sprouts and springs up. By evening, it is withered and dry. For we are consumed in your anger. We are troubled in your wrath. You have set our iniquities before you, our secret sins in the light of your presence. For all our days have passed away in your wrath. We bring our years to an end as a sigh. The days of our years are seventy, or even by reason of strength eighty years; yet their pride is but labor and sorrow, for it passes quickly, and we fly away. Who knows the power of your anger, your wrath according to the fear that is due to you? So teach us to count our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom. Relent, Yahweh! How long? Have compassion on your servants! Satisfy us in the morning with your loving kindness, that we may rejoice and be glad all our days. Make us glad for as many days as you have afflicted us, for as many years as we have seen evil. Let your work appear to your servants, your glory to their children. Let the favor of the Lord our God be on us. Establish the work of our hands for us. Yes, establish the work of our hands.
.... Bible version: World English Bible Image: https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/b/b9/Michelangelo-Buonarroti-Moses-Detail-Replica-Victoria_and_Albert_Museum.jpg
The Joy of Ownership
I remember owning my first car. I felt liberated and rich! The world was mine and I had freedom of movement.
Whilst I’ve never owned a house, I can put myself in the shoes of those who have and can imagine just how secure and strong and safe it must feel. There is joy in ownership.
Not all ownership is equal!
On my workshops I often set myself up to be at fault about something innocuous, just to make a point. When the trap has been laid, I ask the participants, “Who is to blame?”
“It’s YOU, Lex!” they say, laughing. I agree with them and then I invite them to point at the person who is to blame and say it again! As they are pointing at me, I ask them to hold their hands in the index-finger-pointing position. You might like to have a go at that now.
The ‘reveal’ is to ask them to count the number of fingers pointing back at them from their own hand. This usually causes a joyous response around the room as the participants realise they’ve been set up for an “Aha!” moment.
I love owning stuff – most of the time – but rarely enjoy ‘owning’ problems. When we point the finger at others – something I’m really good at – we fail to own our own opportunity to be a part of the solution. The simple exercise of noticing that three fingers on our own hand point back at us when we point our index finger at others may be enough to bring about a shift in our thinking. One pointing out, three pointing back; 25% outside, 75% under our own control.
That litter on the pavement is an issue I can point to and say, “Tut! Tut! People should know better!” It can also become an opportunity where I pick it up even if I do agree that, “People should know better!”
When I remember this illustration, it encourages me to repeat a phrase I learned in training, “I OWN the problem.” When I do this, I discover that there is usually some small step I can take to improve the situation. Yesterday, I was listening to a world expert on the topic of motivation. He was ranting and raving about poor customer service, and I found myself not only agreeing with him but also thinking, “I bet I sound like that!” It wasn’t a very beautiful sound! He was right but the moaning and complaining pulled my energy down. I would like to moan less and own more – in the sense of taking more responsibility for making a difference.
“I own the problem,” is a powerful mantra, and ‘mantra’ comes from Sanskrit, literally meaning the thought behind speech or action.
“I own the problem!”
Perhaps you’d like to chant that with me now.
[Joe Polish story]
“I own the problem!”
If you ‘own’ the problem, you ‘own’ the solution as well!
If you ‘own’ the problem, you ‘own’ the opportunity to change your history!
When we cease to blame others, and focus on what part we can play, it’s like owning that first car. There’s a sense of liberation and wealth, of potency and potential. Let’s, perhaps just for today, put the key in the ignition of decision and drive our minds to somewhere better where we own the problem AND the opportunity.
[Image credit: Charles Deluvio on Unsplash]
Finally, I arrive at the fusion of sounds that I want: Gregorian Chants and Ambient Guitar Not perfect, yet perfect.
Works really well with a room lit only with Church candles.
Image by Stefan Keller from Pixabay
How a simulation of Birds Flocking can bring us remarkable levels of focus, energy, and clarity.
Heidi Skirrow takes to the Interviewer's Seat as comfortably and naturally as Sandi Marshall. It was fun for me to switch roles for once and be the person in the spotlight.
We hope you find this entertaining, informing, and even educational!
Dorset Biz News is a highly valued resource for those of us who love doing business in Dorset!
https://www.dorsetbiznews.co.uk
Dorset Biz News - No.1 business website in Dorset, UK. 20,000+ unique users. Top three stories updated every day Monday to Friday. Feel good, positive and upbeat.
Here, Heidi Skirrow answers our key 20 questions!
Calling for "The Cheerful Leaders" to rise up in our Society, our Civilisation, and BANISH fear-driven rhetoric, policies, and a police-state! We cannot, and, indeed, MUST not allow our future direction to be led by fear. COURAGE is the driver of excellence. By all means don the armour of shields, masks, and gloves to fight and destroy the enemy, but let us do this is a spirit of love, power, and a sound mind!
Image Credit: Levan Ramishvili on Flickr (Creative Commons licence) Winston Churchill at Place de la Bourse, Brussels, February 27, 1949
I upgraded to Blade 2 in the early hours of this morning, and the presets are a pleasure. Instant gratification rating 11/10.
It's an arp in motion monster, and I love it.
Normally, I'd do a quick demonstration using just using the featured soft synth but this one demanded a preset from EZ Drummer that has the most beautifully aggressive snare.
The excellent image is by Stefan Keller from Pixabay. Search for Surreal and Fantasy and you'll find it.
Come near, you nations, and listen; pay attention, you peoples! Let the earth hear, and all that is in it, the world, and all that comes out of it! The Lord is angry with all nations; his wrath is on all their armies. He will totally destroy them, he will give them over to slaughter. Their slain will be thrown out, their dead bodies will stink; the mountains will be soaked with their blood. All the stars in the sky will be dissolved and the heavens rolled up like a scroll; all the starry host will fall like withered leaves from the vine, like shrivelled figs from the fig-tree.
My sword has drunk its fill in the heavens; see, it descends in judgment on Edom, the people I have totally destroyed. The sword of the Lord is bathed in blood, it is covered with fat – the blood of lambs and goats, fat from the kidneys of rams. For the Lord has a sacrifice in Bozrah and a great slaughter in the land of Edom. And the wild oxen will fall with them, the bull calves and the great bulls. Their land will be drenched with blood, and the dust will be soaked with fat.
For the Lord has a day of vengeance, a year of retribution, to uphold Zion’s cause. Edom’s streams will be turned into pitch, her dust into burning sulphur; her land will become blazing pitch! It will not be quenched night or day; its smoke will rise for ever. From generation to generation it will lie desolate; no one will ever pass through it again. The desert owl and screech owl will possess it; the great owl and the raven will nest there. God will stretch out over Edom the measuring line of chaos and the plumb-line of desolation. Her nobles will have nothing there to be called a kingdom, all her princes will vanish away. Thorns will overrun her citadels, nettles and brambles her strongholds. She will become a haunt for jackals, a home for owls. Desert creatures will meet with hyenas, and wild goats will bleat to each other; there the night creatures will also lie down and find for themselves places of rest. The owl will nest there and lay eggs, she will hatch them, and care for her young under the shadow of her wings; there also the falcons will gather, each with its mate.
Look in the scroll of the Lord and read:
None of these will be missing, not one will lack her mate. For it is his mouth that has given the order, and his Spirit will gather them together. He allots their portions; his hand distributes them by measure. They will possess it for ever and dwell there from generation to generation.
New International Version - UK (NIVUK) Holy Bible, New International Version® Anglicized, NIV® Copyright © 1979, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.
Learn how The Contribution Compass with Motivational Mapping, mixed with the 27 Key Questions to Uncover Your Purpose, can open your awareness to the maximum contribution you can deliver during your time on Earth! Nothing too dramatic then!
The free bonus is PsychoGeometrics by Dr Susan Dellinger.
Introducing "Possibility Thinking" - a type of thinking well beyond Positive Thinking.
With the sad news of the death of one of my heroes, Eddie Van Halen, through cancer, I am recommitting to find the possibility in every adversity, just like the Wisdom of the Oyster.
The 7 Habits of Happiness Habit 3 Gratitude As a general rule… Happy people are grateful people. Unhappy people are possessed with a sense of inappropriate ‘entitlement’.
Entitlement, I believe, breeds apathy. If we are ‘entitled’ to benefits in life without adding value, there is a tendency to wait for the benefit to come. We become passive. This is not the Way of the Entrepreneur. Like a Samurai, the Entrepreneur knows how to deliver valued and valuable ‘service’. Only when outstanding value has been consistently delivered does one with an entrepreneurial mindset expect appropriate remuneration.
How can I say all this with any credibility? I can say this with total credibility because I am the man. To this day, I have no idea where my inflated and inappropriate sense of entitlement came from. I certainly wasn’t a confident person and so I don’t think I was overly arrogant (though I most certainly was arrogant on some occasions.)
However, it came into being, I believed the Universe owed me more than it was dishing up! And, when times were very good (jet-setting around the World business class and staying in swanky places while people were telling me I was great – what’s not to love?) – when times were good, I didn’t appreciate them as fully as I could. As wisdom declares, “Pride comes before a fall.” And I fell.
I got proud and arrogant. My old clients said, “We cannot afford to pay you what we used to,” so I said, “Maybe it’s time to move on.” I put all my eggs in one basket, then the bottom of the basket broke.
With all my former clients being cared for by other training providers, I lost nearly everything. I’ve been bankrupt twice and it is only through the kindness of others that I have somewhere to sleep, write, and thus, for me, to live. I write therefore I am!
Now, the sense of entitlement has all but vanished. The void of ingratitude and lack of appreciation has largely gone too. Of course, I probably still have the capacity to be an arrogant and ignorant ingrate, but I don’t want to be.
We have a gawdy shower curtain that cost about 85p reduced in a Sale at ASDA. I am SO grateful for the pleasure and utility it brings. It is covered with Tropical Birds, and I love it. Every shower-time is like visiting an Art Gallery. We’ve found our favourite brand of coffee – and I am grateful for every cup. Nowadays, I can afford to buy a bottle of wine, and I love this luxury.
One of the greatest comforts of my relationship with God is that I have a focus for gratitude – someone to thank… and I’m thankful for traffic lights turning green, a kind word from a retail team member, a smile from a child, the sight of a charm of Goldfinches. My life is bathed in gratitude and I am, at last, happy again.
Let’s do a happiness-health-check. What we are looking for is any growth of an inappropriate sense of entitlement. If you find any, cut it out immediately.
We are also checking for a flow of gratitude. Let’s get ourselves up to the Gratitude Gym and make sure we work out each and every day!
What are your reasons to be cheerful?
What are you grateful for right now?
Episode 2 in a 7 part series on, "The 7 Habits of Happiness." Habit 2 is "Health".
Yes, we know going down the gym is meant to be good for us, but Brain Health (the Brain being the Organ of Happiness) is more about eating Brain Foods, creating a Brain-Boosting Environment, surrounding yourself with sounds and other stimuli that 'entrain' a target-mood. In fact, whatever can be measured in the brain can be modelled using binaural brainwave entrainment technology!
Also, there are Bilateral Exercises that make you look completely daft but are nevertheless brilliant for waking up both-sides of the brain!
Episode 1 in an easily accessible series on the Habits of Happiness. The first habit is Rest. In this episode, I will explain how Happiness begins with being rested, and how the concept of a weekly Sabbath Rest is so good for us.
I will also share with you the power of micro-sabbaths - or F.A.B. pauses for thought and reflection!
Introducing a Well-Being Weekly broadcast designed to leave you feeling uplifted, Sandi Marshall and Lex McKee share a moment with Winnie the Pooh and Piglet. Friendship personified.
The first in a series of 7 publications this Well-Being Week!
Who is YOUR Piglet? To whom are YOU a Piglet?
“Today was a Difficult Day,” said Pooh. There was a pause. “Do you want to talk about it?” asked Piglet. “No,” said Pooh after a bit. “No, I don’t think I do.” “That’s okay,” said Piglet, and he came and sat beside his friend. “What are you doing?” asked Pooh. “Nothing, really,” said Piglet. “Only, I know what Difficult Days are like. I quite often don’t feel like talking about it on my Difficult Days either. “But goodness,” continued Piglet, “Difficult Days are so much easier when you know you’ve got someone there for you. And I’ll always be here for you, Pooh.” And as Pooh sat there, working through in his head his Difficult Day, while the solid, reliable Piglet sat next to him quietly, swinging his little legs…he thought that his best friend had never been more right.
Copyright – AA Milne
528 Hz During this recording, Lex (that'd be 'me') mucks about with his 528 Hz tuning fork. Sandi is passionate about NOT being 'fluffy' but if we were to go down the Rabbit Hole to Fluffy-City, 528 Hz is allegedly the frequency of love, with overtones of DNA and healing.
We will stray towards error if we do not have two feet in place: 1) Knowing the Scriptures - and their Author 2) Knowing the Power of God. BOTH are essential.
Lesson Two is much longer than Lesson One! We go DEEPER! Enjoy this practical guide to how to go deeper with God so that we can truly begin to think like Jesus Christ.
Come aside for 30 minutes to spend time with the Holy Spirit together.
What To Do When Hungry
Autumn is upon us in England. The Season of mellow fruitfulness is predicated upon what was sown and nurtured in the Spring. I love the Natural Truth of seed-time and harvest.
I’m hungry, are you?
Hunger comes for many matters. The spiritual may hunger and thirst for ‘righteousness’ – whatever that may mean. Others hunger for justice. Some may hunger for companionship. I hunger for a hug. A long hug. No patting.
There’s talk of the 5 Languages of Love. Hey, I even found a quiz for us all to try (https://www.5lovelanguages.com/quizzes/) I’m a tactile person – the kind of guy who used to go out of his way to use Wareham Post Office before the refit. Before the ‘improvement’ the old wooden counter was sculpted by countless transactions – scooped out by the exchanges of currencies. I loved feeling the stories in the wood.
If I trust someone, and am not tense, the best way to communicate is wordless. Touch speaks louder than words for me. A warm handshake, the cheek to cheek of a professional kiss, the full embrace of deep friendship… all are worth more than gold to me.
Then along came COVID. Whoever is truly responsible has much to answer for. They’ve hurt our future – and that of our children in education. But the future is yet to come. I have something to say about this present hunger. I have hug hunger. And I am fully aware that this sounds like a callous first world problem!
However, the psychobiology of the mind-body connection is irrefutable. Happy nerve-endings, happy soul. I’m hungry for hugs because my mind-body-system needs them!
Wearing your mask, I cannot read your face… and I never was that much of a mind-reader. Wearing my mask, I literally cannot breathe at times.
What can we do?
We can call this the New Spring. We can intentionally sow that which we want to reap in the New Autumn. This means I need to give the gift of tactile kindness to those I’m allowed to do this to. That cramps my options but doesn’t occlude them. For example, Lady Penelope (she under whose roof I shelter) isn’t tactile… but she is in pain. Years of being on her feet at ASDA are taking their toll. Cuddly she ain’t but give her a foot massage and I can hear the relief. Thus, foot massages it will be.
Thus, if you are hungry – feed someone else. If you are thirsty – give someone else a drink (btw Majestic Wine deliver!) If you are discouraged – encourage someone else. You get the picture.
Oh, and you could get a prize too, if you’re in the UK. I’ve found a Scratch-Off Poster with 100 Random Acts of Kindness. Let’s work out a competition where the prize-winner will be sent one of these as a random act of kindness from me!
What we do to others, we do to ourselves (or so they say!)
Right, I’m off to be a Sow-and-Sow!
Ps. I did the test and my primary love language is “Physical Touch” – so what’s yours?
Ha ha, how about this for a BOLD ambition?!
It arose from enjoying Michael Gelb's insights into, "How to Think like Leonardo da Vinci." That kind of innovative, expansive, Renaissance thinking is essential given that the China Crisis aka World Crisis has, so far, wiped £2.7 Trillion off the World's productivity - that is if productivity can be equated with lost working hours. [Source: https://www.linkedin.com/feed/news/global-income-falls-by-27tn-4222161/ ]
How DARE I write this? Talk about imposter syndrome on steroids! However, that's just an excuse. The thoughts of the most successful Human Being that has ever lived are clearly marked out in Red Ink in some versions of the New Testament! It's a no-brainer. Go through these like an honourable journalist and just report on the way He thinks - that's Gospel Truth!
But that would also be a bit lazy (and boring?)
Instead, whilst I promise to go through ALL the New Testament in this series, I'm not going to do it in order. I'm going to act 'as if' I'm inspired to write this to you in the order it 'comes' to me.
IT BEGINS WITH STRATEGY NOT TACTICS
What Jesus told us to do, as the equivalent of habitual behavioural tactics, really doesn't make sense without first understanding the context of the Divine Strategy for Human Well-Being.
He really was clear on His Mission:
The thief only comes to steal, kill, and destroy. I came that they may have life, and may have it abundantly. The Gospel of John chapter 10, verse 10 Right from the beginning, we are clear that there is a villain in this story - here called, "The thief." The enemy comes to steal, to kill, and to destroy. There is no confusion here. If events in your life steal, kill, or destroy, they are diametrically opposite and opposed to the Character and express Will of God.
What is God's Will, His Intent, His Purpose?
God's purpose is that YOU and I may have Life (with a Capital 'L' methinks) and to have it abundantly.
BEFORE YOU GO FURTHER
God is not a deceiver - that's the other one. There's no trick here. "Abundance" means abundance... plus a lot more!
I'd like you to pause and complete this wonderful exercise.
Mind Map blank template on the topic of "Abundance" giving space to write in what "Abundance" means to you Write on the branches the topics you associate with the topic of "Abundance".
"Abundance" in the Greek
The Greek word is rather splendid. It's a transliteration of "Perissos" which comes from "Peri" (meaning "all-around, excess") beyond what is anticipated, exceeding expectation; "more abundant," going past the expected limit... [Quoted from: https://biblehub.com/greek/4053.htm ] Thus, whatever 'limits' you've put on what Abundance means to you, God can and wills to go beyond it.
SHOCK!
This is SO far beyond my experience and the experience of most people (including all the Christians) that I know, that we have to take a breath in and decide right here and now whether or not God is serious.
I'm siding with the whole, "God means what He says," movement!
This means that the first step to thinking like Jesus Christ is knowing that God's Will is a level of abundance that exceeds our small expectations. The second step is taking that mission on yourself as the agenda for your Life. Your purpose for being here is that those you meet may have Life and have it more abundantly! Their lives are meant to be enriched by working with you. Our task is to make people's lives better, richer, more enjoyable... to redefine their expectations of what 'Life' means. There's a catch, of course! They have to work with the programme - it's active, not passive.
Here endeth lesson one, and I believe we're off to a pretty wonderful start, don't you?
In Episode 2 of Well-Being Wednesday, Sandi Marshall has a rant about unfair insurance practices that penalise being honest with medical professionals.
Image from Matthew Henry on Unsplash. Thanks, Matthew.
I have a Podcast Channel dedicated to my spiritual messages. This one I'd like to share on my Soundcloud channel too as it is suitable for those who may not yet share my encouraging faith!
The dedicated Podcast Channel is called: "Renew The Mind; Transform Your Life." You can find it on all the major platforms, including Amazon Podcasts as of yesterday!
I'd like to share this episode with you as one episode that is accessible to my friends who don't yet share our faith. There is content in here more suitable to an audience unfamiliar with what many believers may take for granted, but stay with it and you'll realise anew how important it is for us to, "think God's thoughts after Him," - Selwyn Hughes' definition of Biblical Meditation.
Neuroscience has much to offer us in terms of exciting confirmation of good Christian habits. Neuroplasticity is consistently demonstrating that the architecture of the brain is transformed by the thoughts that flow through it. We can literally be transformed by thinking new, better thoughts - or 'renewing the mind' as we would describe it from Romans 12:2.
[Now, if I were to offer my body as a living sacrifice - as in verse 1 - I might lose some weight, live longer, and have an even more fruitful ministry!]
I do hope this episode excites you, and encourages you to think more like God.
We live in a World where, if Deepak Chopra says he is god, many people think that's OK, but if I mention Jesus, I'm a weirdo. Let me assure you, I am a weirdo, and I want to think like God thinks, without blaspheming. When we think like God, good character has to be the fruit.
Psychology Today published this very helpful article: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/psychiatry-the-people/202007/10-key-areas-not-miss-when-dealing-depression
This is the audio stream from our video session walking through certain aspects from this diagram: https://cdn.psychologytoday.com/sites/default/files/styles/image-article_inline_full_caption/public/field_blog_entry_images/2020-07/depression_map_chevance_et_all_2020.png?itok=UH8vX4uQ
Frankly, it's one of the most useful infographics we've seen on dealing with depression strategically
You have an astonishing, awe-inspiring, compelling story to share... ...IF you know how to structure your story.
Donald Miller published a genre-defining work in his book, "Building a Storybrand..." His structure works.
A Hero-in-the-making (that's YOU!) Has a problem (internal, external, philosophical, villain) Meets a Guide (the wise person) Who has a plan - a map - a key - a resource - a strategy Something blooming horrible happens that makes the Guide's CTA (Call To Action) a life-defining decision point. What will happen if the almost-Hero continues to do what they've always done? (Clue: if you keep on doing what you've always been doing, you'll keep on getting what you've always been getting... but MORE!) What transformation will happen in the Character of our Almost-Hero if they make the courageous decision and move to fulfil their vocation, their calling, their destiny?
This is how to structure compelling stories, vlogs, podcasts, novels, blogs.
There remains the challenge: Will YOU share your story? If, "Yes!" when?
With Your Permission
Yesterday, would have been my 38th wedding anniversary. The day passed without drama… or regret. We were married for 11 years, with many happy moments. Nevertheless, I could never escape from a creeping sense of disapproval. I was never quite good enough.
Whilst my former spouse rarely made this explicit, her father showed no such self-control!
Between them, they made me feel unworthy, living life under a cloud of criticism.
Except they didn’t make me feel unworthy. They couldn’t. They didn’t have it in them.
The issue was in me.
In technical support circles, we use the initialism: PICNIC. It stands for, “Problem In Chair, Not In Computer.” For today’s blog, I’d like to adapt that to: “Problem In Consciousness, Not In Circumstances.” (Or, for this specific scenario, “Problem In Consciousness, Not In Criticism.”)
This is a life-changing switch of thinking.
This paradigm shift is summarised eloquently in a saying attributed to Eleanor Roosevelt: “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”
The neurological truth is far more likely to be that no one can ‘make’ you feel anything. Like a conversation, or a dance, it takes more than one party! But if you give your consent, there are plenty of people who can feed an ever-increasing sense of inferiority. After all, the brain looks and listens for evidence to confirm the current belief system your mental software is running.
The fact was I had a very poor opinion of myself that my former father-in-law was in complete agreement with, and which my former-wife grew to agree with! PICNIC!
Here’s the really scary (or exciting) part – if I don’t change my opinion of myself, I am destined to play out the same sad game in other relationships. It does not end well!
Let’s play a new game.
In the new game, you and I will have a much more positive opinion of ourselves. Let’s drop mental concepts like ‘superior’ and ‘inferior’ – and even ‘good’ and ‘bad’. I know from seemingly endless examination of my heart that my intentions, 99% of the time, are kind. That’s my preferred state of being: kind, compassionate, generous. Whilst there is a stack of evidence to suggest I have capabilities to be unkind, uncaring, and stingy, these never feel natural. These never feel right.
I am reminded of the (probably apocryphal) claim that Edison tried and failed to create the lightbulb 1000 times. My research suggests Edison and his team explored over 3000 different theories of how to create incandescent light, and we know that Edison tried over 6000 tests of various materials to act as the filament!
That’s persistence!
Kindness, compassion, and generosity are my electric lightbulb. It’s what I’m seeking to be. On the journey to the light, I have failed thousands of times, sometimes in a single day! But the goal, the intention remains.
I now no longer give anyone permission to ‘make’ me feel inferior. I know that they can’t ‘make’ me do anything. I am grateful for all those who clearly intend to ‘make’ me feel loved or appreciated, but I know that the final signing of the permissive agreement lies within me…
…the monsters under your bed, are far more likely to be in your head. Change what’s in your head, and the monsters will vanish!
What permissions have you given to others that you’d like to revoke this week? What permissions would you like to grant to others – asking for what you really want?
The English School System, in which I grew up, did at least pay 'lip service' to the Christian roots of our Civilised Society. An essential part of our daily routine was School Assembly, where we learned many magnificent hymns (although I suspect Iearned this one later in the Pentecostal Churches.)
On waking this morning, this tune was on my heart, and its refrain, "It Is Well, It Is Well, With My Soul!" Each week, I prepare an inspirational message for publication by www.moodscope.com for the Monday blog. Moodscope has an audience of mixed faiths (including humanism) so the policy is not to overtly share a spiritual message. For this reason, I started to meditate on the sensory experiences that lead me to a feeling of well-being. Kind David did a similar exercise when he wanted to self-encourage his soul.
For example, in the beginning of Psalm 42... As the deer pants for the water brooks, so my soul pants after you, God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When shall I come and appear before God? My tears have been my food day and night, while they continually ask me, “Where is your God?” These things I remember, and pour out my soul within me, how I used to go with the crowd, and led them to God’s house, with the voice of joy and praise, a multitude keeping a holy day.
And from Psalm 77 I will remember Yah’s deeds; for I will remember your wonders of old. I will also meditate on all your work, and consider your doings.
In this message, I am encouraging you to intentionally meditate on the sensory 'triggers' that lead to a sense of well-being. Then, if you're feeling proactive, go and seek them out, giving thanks to God for the joy they will bring.
The Secret to Happiness is Putting People First
A young shop-assistant at Dixons in Uxbridge had no idea how much the course of his life would be changed by a company training programme…
Yes, it was me. Dixons sent me off on a two-day programme where I had my first encounter with Corporate Training… and probably my best encounter too. Two charismatic entertrainers, from Time Manager International, introduced me to Neuro Linguistic Programming and Transactional Analysis all in the service of putting people FIRST.
Filled with enthusiasm, I couldn’t wait to get back to the branch and put the customer first.
I had a shock. The manager told me, in no uncertain terms, that he was only interested in one thing – money in the till! But there is nothing more dangerous than an idea whose time has come – and I was transformed.
Funny how we forget, isn’t it? Years later, and after months of misery, I finally had a good few days where I didn’t think I’d be better off dead. They weren’t days of material wealth – far from it – rather, they were days of Putting People First. People… with stories.
All of their stories reminded me of the power of a person with a perceived purpose!
Monday was Jolly Jodie who genuinely gets excited about insurance. Why? Because she can often improve people’s appropriate cover for less money. She makes a difference.
Tuesday was Sparky Sandi whose early career was on the buses in London – and who had achieved this after a childhood marred by double-curvature of the spine - meaning that she had to wear the horrific Milwaukee Brace 23 hours out of every 24. Having transformed her suffering into purpose, she now pursues the mental wellbeing mission within organisations.
Wednesday was Elegant Eliot, an IFA with his own story of breakthroughs against frightening odds. And here’s the point – behind his obvious material success, a man who looks like he’s got everything going for him, there’s a story of struggle… the mess behind the masterpiece.
(Of course, lunch by the sea with Generous Jacqui and Elegant Eliot also helped make the day rather special!)
Thursday was my own turn to be interviewed - by the Lovely Linda. Linda’s a writer too – with a podcast for writers, so it was an effortless and enthusiastic stream of consciousness shared between wordsmiths.
Friday… back to what I have come to expect as ‘normal’! But like the “Putting People First” programme, it was too late. I realised people (one-to-one – not in crowds) give me energy when we get behind the published version of themselves to the stories behind.
Those who know me, know my intense preference for introversion. This doesn’t mean, though, that I don’t like people. Genuinely authentic encounters with people are like books come to life. Stories are enchanting, uplifting, inspiring.
Who could you take time out with this week to listen to their stories? Moodscope is an excellent example of Putting People First. Tell us YOUR story…
Discovery Day 8 (the final day in our 8 Day Series to help you discover which of these 8 Team Types is most like you.)
The goal is to help you know yourself and pursue a career that will keep you in flow 80% of the time. This means maximum contribution and maximum return on investment.
The Calibrator is about "Fine-tuning the Instruments." You improve systems, processes, and even your partner (if they'd let you!) You multiply effectiveness by creating, refining, renewing, upgrading, and fine-tuning a system to expand its value.
WANT TO KNOW FOR CERTAIN? The Contribution Compass is a profiling tool that helps build high performing teams. When you are in flow, you'll feel you are in the right place, doing the right things, for the right purpose.
You can research and compare the other episodes in the complete series:
Day 1 - The Catalyst - Accelerating Change https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-1-the-catalyst
Day 2 - The Champion - Blazing a Trail https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-2-the-champion
Day 3 - The Coach - Igniting Greatness https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-3-the-coach
Day 4 - The Connector - Building Bridges https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-4-the-connector
Day 5 - The Custodian - Honouring the Promise https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-5-the-custodian
Day 6 - The Cultivator - Nuturing Growth https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-6-the-cultivator
Day 7 - The Conductor - Optimising the Performance https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-7-the-conductor
and Day 8 - The Calibrator - Fine-tuning the Instruments
Discovery Day 7 (in an 8 Day Series to help you discover which of these 8 Team Types is most like you.)
The goal is to help you know yourself and pursue a career that will keep you in flow 80% of the time. This means maximum contribution and maximum return on investment.
The Conductor is about "Optimising the Performance". If this type fits you, you are the factual, logical, process-driven person who can refine what the company offers. This enables the company to rinse and repeat using your systematic approach.
You're about certainty. When you have optimised each process and system, you can bold assert, "If you do 'A' to 'Z' - this will be the predicable result." Details and data are your friends and allies.
WANT TO KNOW FOR CERTAIN? The Contribution Compass is a profiling tool that helps build high performing teams. When you are in flow, you'll feel you are in the right place, doing the right things, for the right purpose.
You can research and compare the other episodes in this series so far: Day 1 - The Catalyst https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-1-the-catalyst
Day 2 - The Champion https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-2-the-champion
Day 3 - The Coach https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-3-the-coach
Day 4 - The Connector https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-4-the-connector
Day 5 - The Custodian https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-5-the-custodian
Day 6 - The Cultivator https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-6-the-cultivator
Discovery Day 6 (in an 8 Day Series to help you discover which of these 8 Team Types is most like you.)
The goal is to help you know yourself and pursue a career that will keep you in flow 80% of the time.
The Cultivator is about "Nurturing Growth". If this type fits you, you are grounded in empirical reality, calm, realistic, data-driven and darn efficient!
You're able to think long-term and plan accordingly. You can even pace the team's delivery so that there's no burnout.
Details and data are your friends and allies.
WANT TO KNOW FOR CERTAIN? The Contribution Compass is a profiling tool that helps build high performing teams. When you are in flow, you'll feel you are in the right place, doing the right things, for the right purpose.
You can research and compare the other episodes in this series so far: Day 1 - The Catalyst https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-1-the-catalyst
Day 2 - The Champion https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-2-the-champion
Day 3 - The Coach https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-3-the-coach
Day 4 - The Connector https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-4-the-connector
Day 5 - The Custodian https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-5-the-custodian
Discovery Day 5 (in an 8 Day Series to help you discover which of these 8 Team Types is most like you.)
The goal is to help you know yourself and pursue a career that will keep you in flow 80% of the time.
I long for a Custodian in my life! What my clients need most is someone in my team who is 'The Promise Keeper' - as in helping me to keep my promises!!! My intentions are good but as a Champion, I'm too often distracted by opportunities to slap on my armour and rescue the kingdom as I fire-fight yet another drama. That's why I've got so many partially-finished castles in the realm. If you're a Custodian, you'll help the whole team honour the brand's promises.
The Contribution Compass is a profiling tool that helps build high performing teams. When you are in flow, you'll feel you are in the right place, doing the right things, for the right purpose.
Check out the other episodes in this series so far: Day 1 - The Catalyst https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-1-the-catalyst
Day 2 - The Champion https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-2-the-champion
Day 3 - The Coach https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-3-the-coach
Day 4 - The Connector https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-4-the-connector
Are you comparing your 'mess' with someone else's 'masterpiece'? If you look at most people's lives through the lens of Instagram, or Facebook, Twitter, or even LinkedIn, you would be forgiven they've got everything 'together' and their lives are amazing.
The truth is we don't see the messy process it takes to make good, finished art. We are ALL in a mess. If we judge our progress by other people's finished work, it will be well nigh impossible to feel encouraged. Understanding that mess is part of the process and not something to be avoided is a great leap forward in maturity.
Enjoy the podcast and then embrace your mess!
And when you see someone else's life in a huge mess, trust that with the right creative vision, there's a masterpiece in there... somewhere!
Messily Yours Lex
Discovery Day 4 (halfway in an 8 Day Series to help you discover which of these 8 Team Types is most like you.)
The goal is to help you know yourself and pursue a career that will keep you in flow 80% of the time.
You're going to love the Connector whose mission is all about "Building Bridges" You are grounded in 'reality' AND understand the strength of relationships. You've also got a keen sense of timing.
The Contribution Compass is a profiling tool that helps build high performing teams. When you are in flow, you'll feel you are in the right place, doing the right things, for the right purpose.
Check out the other episodes in this series so far: Day 1 - The Catalyst https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-1-the-catalyst
Day 2 - The Champion https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-2-the-champion
Day 3 - The Coach https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-3-the-coach
Discovery Day 3 (in an 8 Day Series to help you discover which of these 8 Team Types is most like you.)
The goal is to help you know yourself and find work that will keep you in flow 80% of the time.
You're going to love the Coach whose mission it to "Ignite Greatness". Enthusiastic and Ebullient! People Matter Most! [So look out systems and numbers!]
The Contribution Compass is a profiling tool that helps build high performing teams. When you are in flow, you'll feel you are in the right place, doing the right things, for the right purpose.
Check out the other episodes in this series so far: Day 1 - The Catalyst https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-1-the-catalyst
Day 2 - The Champion https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-2-the-champion
Discovery Day 2 (in an 8 Day Series to help you discover which of these 8 Team Types is most like you.)
The goal is to help you know yourself and find work that will keep you in flow 80% of the time.
You're going to love the trailblazing Champion! Energy, spark, charisma!
The Contribution Compass is a profiling tool that helps build high performing teams. When you are in flow, you'll feel you are in the right place, doing the right things, for the right purpose.
Check out the first episode - The Catalyst: https://soundcloud.com/lex-mckee/discovery-day-1-the-catalyst
Discovery Day 1 (in an 8 Day Series to help you discover which of these 8 Team Types is most like you.)
The goal is to help you know yourself and find work that will keep you in flow 80% of the time.
The Contribution Compass is a profiling tool that helps build high performing teams. When you are in flow, you'll feel you are in the right place, doing the right things, for the right purpose.
Music and the Magic Beans - a Monday Moodscope Blog to lift our spirits as we enter into a new week.
How tall could you grow? How high could you go?
I was sitting in the garden, in the glorious sunshine, drinking particularly fine coffee, and admiring the exponential growth of our beans.
The beans, like magic, have grown to the top of the bamboo canes provided for structure… and well beyond. Now, like a triffid, the top growth waves laterally in the breeze - seeking opportunity to climb higher. It wants to grow taller, it wants to reach the sky.
I mused to myself, “If the bamboo went higher, just how tall would the beans grow before they said, ‘enough!’?”
I suspected they would grow very tall indeed - a bit like a magic beanstalk you may have heard about.
A good writer doesn’t often mix metaphors, but my mind often jumps from one topic to another. So, let’s go with the flow of my thoughts.
Looking at the beans and bamboo, I could see different talents. The bamboo canes offer a reliable structure, the beans offer an ability to climb and entwine, and to draw strength from the Sun and the soil. Without the bamboo, the beans would flounder and probably rot on the damp soil, in the shadow of other plants. Their destiny was to grow high, to reach the sky, but only with the right support.
If you feel supported at the moment, as I do, but are not achieving amazing things that give you joie de vivre, you may need new support of a different kind.
My mind then jumped to music - specifically to the components of rhythm, harmony, and melody. The beans enjoy the daily rhythm of sunshine and shade, of day and night. The beans are not the Sun but they know how to work with the unique talent the Sun has in order to grow. A daily rhythm.
The beans themselves know the power of harmony - the ability to wrap around others in order to grow tall and magnificent. Harmony.
The bamboo, famed for its stature, knows how to grow firm, straight, strong and tall, like a good melody.
Then I thought of Moodscope in the light of both the magic beans and the power of music.
When we regularly take the assessment, this is like rhythm - and like the Sun shining on our strengths, and the moon revealing our challenges.
Harmony comes from the comments of other Moodscopers, seeking to encourage us, and from our designated buddies, watching for our well-being. Harmony is being and feeling understood.
And the song’s melody is each blog - each blog a song in itself building a library of delights to dance to each day. Everyday, we sing a new song.
Rhythm, Harmony, Melody.
With these unique talents each playing their part, I wonder how tall we can grow, and how high can we go. With one another’s help, can we reach the sky?
Whatever the validity of my thoughts, I was pleased to pause and reflect on how valuable each Moodscope member is, how nutritious each comment, how important the regular assessment is, and how unique each message. It is good when we dwell together in harmony. With one another’s help, and the structure of Moodscope, perhaps the sky is the limit… or beyond!
And here’s a final thought. If we can help Moodscope grow taller, how many more people could we help?
Lizzy Amos has been kind enough to encourage me on numerous occasions so I have recorded this reading of Spike Milligan's, "Silly Old Baboon," to bring a smile to her weekend.
Whilst the poem is called, "Silly Old Baboon," the baboon is far from silly. He has a rare talent for running. He is trying to get to the Moon using the wrong strategy but we can nevertheless applause him for what he is good at. All of us can look silly when we use our talents in the wrong place or for the wrong cause or for the wrong reason... However, we all possess a unique talent and finding that talent is the secret of learning to shine. And when we shine, we experience true joie d vivre.
“Everyone is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”
Photo by Max van den Oetelaar on Unsplash
Who Am I? (A Poem)
Who am I when I am Powerless? Penniless? Pointless? Who am I, Sir? I am ME, that is who I am!
I am a Writer. The same Writer who wrote When times were fair That same Writer that was there Is within me now - (Though full of care.) I write, therefore I am; I write because I (still) can.
Who am I when I am Powerless? Penniless? Pointless? Who am I, Ma’am? I am ME, that is who I am! I am a Master of Imagination. With the power of thought I create new worlds And populate them with kind and thoughtful folks; Folks, who do not rip each other off Nor do they rip one another apart. A Kingdom of Kindness, I create And hope to live there Before it becomes too late.
Who am I when I am Powerless? Penniless? Pointless? Who am I, Dear Listener? I am ME, that is who I am! I am never powerless For my power is the power of the pen To write all wrongs! To awaken the Sleepers to the dangers Bashing at the Gates For sleeping, they so meekly Lay aside dear freedoms… Dear freedoms, dearly bought. I am never penniless for I have the vast wealth Of the imagination - with which I create wealth For those who value free thinking! For those who value free speech! My life is never pointless While I have breath left to make my point And when those points resonate With other powerless, penniless, pointless souls We will stir one another up To great and courageous Works And Art That will free the mind Liberate the soul Loose the spirit If only our own.
Who are you, Dear Soul, when you are Powerless? Penniless? Pointless?
Tell me For I long to hear Of your inner thirst And hunger.
I will tell you who you are not. You are not someone defined by purchased power You are not defined by the wealth of banks Nor are you vindicated by the opinion of others Who have not walked an inch in your shoes… Let alone a mile.
You are YOU And that is enough For ME.
One who has a friend Like YOU Has MUCH wealth, power, and purpose.
Image credit: Photo by Amir Geshani on Unsplash
[Extract...] 7 Ways to Create Customer Delight
Positive Energy - what we’d often call ‘enthusiasm’. But it’s more than enthusiasm. My village shop is filled with team members who smile naturally, readily, and authentically. They often laugh, sending out a clear message that even if the work is boring, the team is fun to work with, and they are pleased to see the right kind of customer. I’ve never once seen one on their phone inside the shop, and they all make friendly eye contact. I shop there for a sense of connection, not just for the food, nor just for the convenience. Manners! I love it when they say, “Thank you for waiting,” or, “We’re sorry to have kept you waiting.” I think the first option is better - after all, who doesn’t like to be thanked? A genuine, “Enjoy the rest of your day,” or, “See you later!” always goes down well too. It’s like garnish on a good meal, or wrapping on a valuable gift - finishing it perfectly. Know Thy Customer! The local shop gets to know its customers, and many of the team seem to take a genuine interest in how my day has been… even if there’s a queue! Some of them even know my favourite products and tell me when they are on special. Get to Know Thy Customer! Now, here’s a strange secret: asking the right question of your customer is a massive, if veiled, compliment. It says, “Your opinion matters to me - which means that you matter to me. Learning to ask great questions is a wonderful way to connect with people at a deeper level. Give more than they asked for - go the extra mile. This doesn’t mean sacrificing profits, quite the opposite. You may notice that the customer has purchased smoked salmon and mention, “Did you see the Dill reduced in the chiller?" A four-second jump into the customer’s shoes can really strengthen the connection. Think, "What do I need when I prepare smoked salmon?" Lemon? Capers? Avocado? With skill, this can be framed as, “Oh I love smoked salmon with lemon, capers, and avocado!” The number of times I’ve come back from the shop and have ‘forgotten’ a key ingredient is embarrassing. Be a personal guide to your customers! You may even earn them some kudos when they arrive home with positive enhancements to the meal, and save them some embarrassment. Rumpelstiltskin! Our stories and history emphasise the mystical power of a name. If you know your customer’s name, use it appropriately. It’s a magical code that works wonders for a spell. I remember my first experience of 'Chinese Whispers' - the takeaway in Corfe Mullen. The manager looked at my payment card and said, “There you go, Mr McKee; enjoy your food.” Unforgettable first impression. Finally, become an NLP Ninja. The most profoundly practical technique I learned on my NLP training (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) was called, “Pacing and Leading,” - all with a view to building Rapport. “People like us, like us.” When we match people’s culture, mannerisms, style, language, preferences, and even movements - the 'Pacing' aspect - people feel safe and at ease. The 'Leading' part is then to offer them something on their wavelength to their benefit that they wouldn’t have had without the interaction. Whilst all the above is easy to apply to a retail scenario - it all works where there is any face-to-face interaction with customers - including at networking events.
Were touch is removed as a medium for a positive customer experience, we must rely on other messages to help make each customer have a positive Affective Customer Experience (A.C.E.).
In the second in a series of Podcasts on creating an amazing impact in the time of "Covid the Barbarian" - Lex McKee shares insights on how we can act upon the fact that the 'love' customers feel is every bit as important as the product and service delivery.
IMAGE CREDIT Thanks to Vladislav Klapin for sharing their work on Unsplash.
This podcast explores our default position of acting from our essential nature - the leopard cannot change its spots.
But there are two ways to escape from the default: we can change (which is quite unlikely), and we can make choices.
Here is a message about both, and how the future holds hope for those bold enough to reinvent themselves like Milton H Erickson - a pioneer in therapeutic hypnosis.
"On A Free Day, You Can See Forever." A play on the title of the song, "On A Clear Day," this is my Monday Moodscope podcast from the blog of the same name.
I'd lost sight of the future with all the noise of this current crisis and the internal chatter of a worried mind. So, I took a "Free Day." I bunked off in the middle of the week and went West to Lyme Regis and then Colmer's Hill near Bridport. There were some lessons waiting for me in the relative quiet, lessons I share in this podcast.
I wrote the music too. The track is on Soundcloud, and it is called, "Picture the Future," after the name of the main preset I used from Sample Logic's "Bohemian" sound library.
VIDEO FROM THE FREE DAY https://youtu.be/puAKRNt76tM
KIM SEARLE'S INTERVIEW WITH ADRIAN HOSFORD, CHAIRMAN OF MOODSCOPE https://youtu.be/c7-XKRX1CB8
The World has changed, and what a wonderful opportunity we have to change with it. We can have change thrust upon us, causing us to react, or we can experience change and choose to respond in ways that suit us.
I believe it's the ideal time to reflect on whether our current location and vocation suit us. When we change our environment, we transform our mental state, and thus our experience of life. Whilst physically relocating may not be an option for you or me, choosing to spend more time in places that lift our spirit is most certainly an option. And what about vocation. Whilst I don't use 'revocation' in this recording, the concept is there. If we can relocate for our wellbeing, why can't we revocate! We can put first-things-first and find a vocation that will better suit the next chapter of our life.
If you were to retrain for a new vocation, what profession or career would you choose? Imagine there are no limits, and give the answer that comes from your heart?
Which locations have special meaning and significance for you? How could you spend more time there?
https://youtu.be/LNBjMRvOB5M great remix from the Pet Shop Boys
Full transcript here: https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/sensory-marketing-time-covid-barbarian-lex-mckee/
When touch is under pressure during the COVID Crisis (or the China Crisis - sounds more like an 80's New Romantic Band), how can we purposefully harness the other senses to create an amazing customer experience?
Sensory Marketing comes to the rescue.
Kay Harrington is an amazing Rapid Transformational Therapist who created tailor-made, yes 'bespoke', sessions for every client because every client is unique.
This relaxation is a golden opportunity for you to hear Kay's voice for yourself and get really relaxed into the bargain.
It was my pleasure and privilege to write and record the music for this beautiful journey into tranquillity.
Discover more about Kay at: https://www.kayharringtontherapy.co.uk
Image courtesy of Unsplash "Magic Bowls"
RETURN TO SENDER
I’ve just heard a phrase in a video from The School of Life that may be one of the most profound truths I’ve ever encountered… if it really is true.
“An inner voice always used to be an outer voice.”
The sentence comes from a video entitled, “Overcoming Bad Inner Voices,” a theme we often address here on Moodscope.
https://youtu.be/gGuZVuUBeiQ
Why am I so excited by this?
The lady voicing the video offers The School of Life as an alternative voice - something I believe Moodscope is for its members. This voice is a gentle friend who has experienced some of the worst events life can throw at us, and yet has chosen not to become bitter. It is the voice our mothers should have had, but let’s not go there, eh? May we each, increasingly, become a voice to one another that is positively convincing, confident, and constructive… and so consistent that we all learn to internalise the kind voice that is ‘Moodscope’ - our uncritical friend.
It’s a voice that is uninterested in the external signals of success: being good at stuff. Rather, it loves us for just being. Loved as a Human Being, not a Human Doing. I’ve been getting to grips with Unconditional Love over the years, but I can now sense a new route to such a blissful experience. The route is to be the voice, that alternative voice, that pours our positive affirmation of the ‘other’ in such a way that our outside voice may eventually become internalised as their own internal voice. Our mission is to speak words of life and hope and love ‘into’ them.
If our heads really do contain the voices of all the people who have ever poured their thoughts into our consciousness, it’s pruning time! Out with the secateurs of love, and let’s get busy.
When I’ve cut off the heads of some of those very many negative and even ‘conditional’ voices, I’m going to box them up, seal them tightly, and mark on the box, “Return to Sender.”
Here’s what Moodscope’s voice might say: Because of Moodscope’s inner voice, I am becoming… More attentive - able to pay close attention More interested in life and others, and thus more interesting More active, feeling more energy More determined, becoming increasingly resolute and resilient Stronger - feeling able to cope with difficulties that, previously, would have beaten me Increasingly inspired, feeling more of a desire to do something Proud of what I am achieving More alert - I really am becoming quick to notice and act appropriately Really rather eager - enthusiastic, even! So much so, I’m actually quite excited, looking forward to things!!
This is the Podcast version of today's blog for Moodscope: https://www.moodscope.com/blog/essentially-uplifting
Here’s what the following five scents are supposed to be associated with.
Lavender = calm, easing anxiety. Lavender at bedtime is reckoned to help some of us sleep better and feel more energised the day after. Cedarwood = stress relieving. It may even boost performance and productivity. Frankincense = peace and comfort. Chamomile = anti-inflammatory - and thus a rebalancing. May positively affect digestion. Grapefruit = an energiser!
These insights are not mine - I have passed them on from burningtree.com
https://www.burningtree.com/5-essential-oils-that-may-improve-mental-health/
This is the Audio from the following Video: https://youtu.be/2SqBzK6c-2Y
I want you to, "Live Long and Prosper!" Here is the first of 365 Vlogs pursuing this desire!
The process of moving from creativity to innovation, from idea to 'success' is simple:
Inspiration - get inspired by an idea Motivation - find the motivation to actualise that idea Action - take the action required, fuelled by the motivation you've found Let's be honest.
I prefer this order. "I awake, inspired by a million-dollar-idea; I am motivated to take massive action, immediately. I make a million dollars from my inspired idea." "I rinse and I repeat." AIM is a cycle
My preferred order feels nice.
It takes effort but it is easy effort - feeling 'effortless'.
It also evades me much of the time.
If I waited for the motivation to come before I took action, I wouldn't achieve much.
Good News - AIM is a cycle
In most cases, a 'cycle' is a repeated sequence of events. To be fair, there's usually something that starts the cycle, but the really good news it that the AIM cycle can begin with any of the steps.
If you begin with Action, Inspiration and Motivation can follow. The first writer to give me advice on writing said simply,
"Write 1000 words per day." He got up and wrote 1000 words before doing anything else every day.
Isaac Asimov had more than 500 books published. He had little time for "Writer's Block." His work ethic may have come from his father. An owner of a sweet shop, Isaac's father opened the shop at 6am every day regardless of whether or not he felt motivated to do so.
Isaac wrote like his father conducted business. It was usually a 12 hour day, often from 9.30am through to 10pm. Writers write, right?
To maintain this level of massive action, Isaac also developed a straightforward writing style - speaking clearly to the reader. Furthermore, he did not concern himself with the opinions of the critics. None of his critics wrote 500 books. Action was the key.
Mark Manson in, "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck," suggests writing 200 words is sufficient to 'prime the pump'. The idea is that if you begin, even with 200 words that would turn out to be unusable, the inspiration would kick in and 800 valuable words would flow.
"Don't just sit there. Do something. The answers will follow." So said Mark Manson's Maths' Teacher
"Action isn't just the effect of motivation, it's also the cause of it." So says Mark Manson Beginning with Motivation
You can't contradict a cycle like the AIM Cycle that I'm recommending.
You can begin with Action, find Inspiration kick in, and discover the Motivation to finish the Action!
You can begin the easy way with Inspiration, become Motivated, and take Action!
However, there is a third way.
Understand what Motivates you - what your natural sources of energy are.
You may be like any three of the following...
The Defender - finding energy in security, stability, and predictability The Friend - energised by a sense of belonging, enjoying meaningful relationships
The Star - getting super-pumped through recognition, respect, and social esteem The Director - getting a rush from controlling and directing resources The Builder - enjoying money, material comforts, and above-average living The Expert - relishing your position as a key person of influence in your field The Creator - receiving a buzz from being innovative and expressing your creativity The Spirit - coming alive when you feel free from restrictions and commitments The Searcher - finding fulfilment in living life with a specific purpose where you may make a significant difference to the world, providing ideas, or products, or services that others also find worthwhile. This approach to the AIM Cycle then flows thus: Understand your strongest Motivators and place yourself in a routine and an environment and in company that all promote those Motivators
Boo - an extended version of the blog to be published on Moodscope.com on 25th May.
I hope you didn’t jump… for I mean, “Boo…” as in, “Boo hoo,” - crying, not as in, “Boo!” (Like in some ScoobyDoo thing!)
When was the last time you had a really good, unrestrained cry? A proper sob? You’ve heard people say, “Go and get a proper job,” well, I’m talking about having a proper sob.
I’ve read the unwritten manual for, “Men in the West,” (and their behaviour) and the invisible entry is very clear on this topic: “Big Boys Don’t Cry!” Like stealing a look at my Sister’s Jackie Magazine’s problem page when I was growing up, I then stole a look at the unwritten manual for, “Women in the West,” (and their behaviours) and it said almost the same: “Big Girls Don’t Weep!” (Now, I made that all up, there are no manuals, and our culture on the subject of, “Crying like a Baby,” is equally all made up. It’s all invented. Babies cry because it’s the authentic response to distress.)
Think how many times, as soon as a baby is crying, the comforter, this dummy thing, gets stuffed in their mouth, so that the message is clear: “Babies shouldn’t cry!”
This is all nonsense!
We are meant to cry when we are unhappy, suffering, and are distressed. Whether you ever saw yourself as a, “Mummy’s Girl” or a, “Mummy’s Boy,” we are all, psychologically at heart, a Mummy’s Boy or Girl.
Like needing a good sob, we need our mummy. Mum’s have many roles but one of the best is just to be there when the weight of our young world becomes just too much to process and we have a little breakdown… a sob. The hug and the comforting words, “There, there…” are enough to see us through to a new equilibrium, a new level of resilience, but we need the hug, and we need the cry.
My Truth
The truth is, Mum never was much of a hugger, and I don’t ever remember her saying, “There, there… this too shall pass.” However, I do remember, vividly, when Penelope, as a mature, sensible, adult woman, got so low as to simply mouth the words, barely audibly, “I want my Mummy…” Her Mum died young and my Mum passed on last year, so today I’m talking about the generalisation of what, “Mum,” could mean to all of us, and recommending the power of sobbing to help our authentic inner child.
Guanyin
Eastern Philosophy has the figure, Guanyin. Described by Alain de Botton as a saintly female figure associated strongly with mercy, compassion, and kindness. She has shrines all over the East. The Mother Figure. Adults go to her shrines and feel perfectly at liberty to burst into tears.
And this isn’t always about sorrow. Sometimes it’s about being overwhelmed with a sense of compassion and love. Have the needs of childhood really disappeared? Diminished, they maybe, but I would suggest each of us still has within that three-year-old child in occasional need of comfort.
When faced with unconditional kindness, or deep sorrow, or even the overwhelming enormity of life’s complexities and capriciousness, we need a moment or more of release. I’ve never been a Catholic but listening to the Beatles’ song, “Let It Be,” I’m reassured that, “Mother Mary,” offered them some similar non-judgmental comfort, non-judgmental comfort like that of Guanyin.
So, “When we find ourselves in times of trouble, may the Mother Figure come to you and me, speaking words of wisdom… Let it be.” No Answer Necessary
Interestingly, in these situations, Guanyin, Mother Mary, the Mother Figure – there’s no answer there, there’s just the words of comfort… and the presence… and the cuddle… and the permission to sob.
The Power of The Carpenters
As for me, I’ll be bunging The Carpenters on the music machine, (“I’ll Say Goodbye To Love,” and other such uplifting songs), running a bath – complete with bubbles, candles, privacy, a glass of red wine, and a good long sob.
No guilt. No shame. No hesitation. Do you need any more permission to do the same?
Let it be.
Photo by Brett Jordan on Unsplash
Playing Tag
I’m told it is Mental Health Awareness Week. I smile at this because for me every week is Mental Health Awareness Week. Perhaps they’ll begin selling Greetings Cards.
Putting my cynical self to one side for a moment, anything that raises awareness of the most enduring plague ever to afflict humanity is welcome. Most welcome. Maybe there's some relief to be had.
Last week, I was fortunate enough to hear a presentation from Kay Harrington – a Rapid Transformational Therapist. She mentioned the metaphor of tagging, where our younger selves have uncritically accepted the tags people have placed on our personality and performance and potential over the formative years – 0-7 years of age.
I have a vision of a child in a formerly beautiful duffle coat, now covered with tags that say things far worse than, “Please look after this bear.”
They say foolish and inaccurate things like, “Lazy,” and “Ugly,” and “Stupid.” I know, this doesn’t sound like a positive blog but it really will become one! Stay with me!
You and I, without our knowing consent, have accepted a whole plethora of tags in our most suggestible years. Many of these tags were ‘gifted’ to us like ‘gift tags’ from the best of intentions. Nevertheless, they were inaccurate and unhelpful. After all, the only people who can really know and define ourselves are… well, ourselves.
The well-meaning authority-figure who innocently suggested we’d make a great nurse, or fireman, or counsellor, or accountant, or teacher, or bricklayer, or surgeon… knew very little of what we’d really be great at.
Thus today, as we enter Mental Health Awareness Week, I offer you a pair of spiritual scissors. With these scissors, I offer a suggestion: “Feel free to snip the strings holding any tags to your beautiful and delightful duffle coat!
Am I lazy? (“Snip!”) – no, I’m one of the hardest working creatives I know.
Am I ugly? (“Snip!”) – no, I have a beautifully repaired soul, brought back to wholeness through the golden threads of kindness and unconditional love knitting me back together (‘Kindness’ being the theme of this year’s Mental Health Awareness Week.)
Am I stupid? (“Snip!”) Are you serious? I think about everything! If the unexamined life is not worth living, my life is most definitely worth living! I could be the most considered soul in history!!!
Take the scissors to the strings that still hold your own limiting tags and labels in place.
Sever them.
Snip!
And share with us the limiting programmes and beliefs you are becoming free from.
My favourite ridiculous belief is wasting my life waiting for ‘the One’ – that soulmate who completes me – heals my loneliness. What a crock of sh…
Instead, I’m now enjoying those friends who kind of partially get me! No one could ever understand this level of complexity!
Snip and be free my friends!
The easier way to productively move from an idea through to monetisation or other recognition of the value of that idea is to follow three steps: 1) Get Inspired! 2) Wait for the Motivation to fuel the activity you'll need to invest to develop the idea into a viable product or service 3) Take that action!
Following the AIM Cycle in this order may be pleasant, but it would crush many projects before they were completed. Why? Because you'd be waiting for two elements you can't easily control: the inspiration and the motivation.
A far more consistent strategy is to begin with action - just start! Using writing as an example, I talk about daring to write what might turn out to be 200 words that are unusable. This act of courage 'primes the pump' allowing Inspiration and Motivation to catch up! The result will often be that inspiration will kick in and the motivation to continue typing. 800 words worthy of publication will begin to flow through your fingertips!
However, there is a third way. This is to put yourself in the ideal circumstances to 'catch' Inspiration and Motivation. How? By doing your Motivational Map with me so that we can know with certainty the 'rocket fuel' for your productivity. Once we know what really presses your ignition switch we can make sure you choose the rituals, the working environment, and the right company to encourage you to be read to leap ahead.
Message me in the comments as soon as you're ready to stop wasting time and start getting ahead.
Image credit: Photo by Greg Rakozy on Unsplash
THE BLESSED BLACKDROP The Blessed Blackdrop
In one of the function rooms at the Solent Hotel in Hampshire, England, there is a backdrop. It is like a black curtain that goes almost the full length of one wall. Blackdrop was a spelling mistake but one I like.
I like the spelling mistake because this black backdrop – this blackdrop – conceals a secret.
At the flick of a switch, this blackdrop becomes lit by 10,000 stars. It is an LED curtain, and it looks like the sky at night when powered up.
Photographing and videoing members of my network against the blackdrop was ideal. The contrast made them seem brighter and bolder. This got me thinking.
The natural state of the universe is not visible light but rather darkness. I am told there is a backdrop of microwave radiation everywhere, but I don’t understand this nor can I see it. What I do see is a blackdrop punctuated by billions of beautiful stars.
My spiritual friends tell me that, “Darkness is just the absence of Light.” If this is so, it is Darkness, not Light, that is the canvas upon which Light paints its patterns. Darkness is the norm. Darkness is the dominant state.
I’ve wasted decades agonising over how Life ‘ought’ to be. Life ought to be fair, just, kind, full of love. Whilst that would be great, it’s not been my experience, nor, when I listen to the lessons of history, has it been the dominant experience for the majority of humans throughout time. Nature, herself, though beautiful, is also violent, dangerous, cruel and capricious.
This is good news… if we use it to revise our expectations.
The truth is that Darkness is the canvas. Struggle, disappointment, setbacks, sickness, strife, dissatisfaction, and suffering aren’t ‘wrong’ because they ‘shouldn’t’ be there. They are the norm. They just ‘are’. Once I let go of a sense of entitlement to a good life – one where everything ‘goes right’ – one devoid of trouble - I discover something even more wonderful than the transformation of the Solent’s Blackdrop into a Starscape. I discover new dimensions of gratitude and joy.
Given that all of us are born into a life that will know suffering, every cup of coffee becomes a joy. Every sunny day. Every rainy day. Every kind word. Every act of kindness. Every experience of the shower. Every flower. Every glass of wine. Every olive. Every slice of toast.
Walk this way for a week and then a new transformation will appear. It’s like flicking a switch.
The backdrop to your life and my life will become not Darkness but Gratitude. Gratitude becomes the canvas upon which moments of joy decorate our day.
What are you grateful for today?
[Author's note. I am grateful for YOU! I remember that you have made a choice to listen to this, perhaps even to leave a comment, like it, or share it. That takes time and energy, so I say, "Thank You!"]
Written and recorded for The Boardroom Network Online, here is a recipe for Life that has been tested and proven over millions of years! The idea is simple: invest time and attention on increasing your experience of each of these seven steps or characteristics, and your experience of Life will be accentuated!
You don’t need to watch any of the links that follow to get the messages: “You don’t need to be outstanding…" “Ordinary is close enough.” "Lead a life of cheerful desperation, and all will be well…"
Links for the brave… If you want to walk free of the PRESSURE to be Someone Special, start listening to Alain de Botton (School of Life on YouTube – the 8 rules are hilarious https://youtu.be/1JCJVaK48RM ) and maybe Jordan Peterson. I’m listening to Mark Manson’s audible version of his book, “The Subtle Art of Not Giving A….” The last word of the title is a rude one. In fact, that rude word is used to punctuate the whole message. How vulgar! How delicious!
As a fine, upstanding, ‘Special’ member of a local Evangelical Charismatic Church, I have to say, “I’m *king (insert that word) loving it.” (Way better than McDonalds’ trademark term!) Perhaps the best example of these philosophies fused into a powerful advert is Dollar Shave Club, making the most of less marketing fluff, and in the process delivering the best marketing I’ve ever seen. If you’re easily offended, don’t watch: https://youtu.be/ZUG9qYTJMsI
Back in the room. Today, on LinkedIn, I was told how “Super-excited” one of my contacts was to be delivering some life-changing intervention. I didn’t get as far as the intervention as I reached for the bucket. When did “exciting” cease to be superlative enough?
Now, allegedly, I need to be “super-pumped” to share “awesome” stuff with you.
Yeah, right.
Do you know I’m British?
The British don’t get super-pumped, nor do we get super-excited. The only super we have is superannuation.
I'm, then, somewhat keen to share what follows...
Looking at me, you may reasonably wonder if I posed as a model for various figures of the Laughing Buddha I’ve seen in Chinese restaurants for years, I think I’m turning more Buddhist. Buddhist teaching includes the baseline of “Life is suffering!” or at least, “Life is unsatisfactory,” “Life is disappointing,” “Life is pain,” depending on how you translate the word, “Duḥkha.”
What REALLY got me laughing literally out loud with Alain de Botton’s 8 Rules was the question, “In what ways are you mad?” No offence meant here, but in the softer understanding of “mad” as meaning “a bit bonkers”, I really did giggle… as anyone who has seen my taste in trousers would attest to.
Alain asserts no one has had a ‘normal’ childhood, and therefore we are all ‘unbalanced’! I hope you like this too because I LOVE it! But the one that really hit home was rule 7: Cheerful Despair!
Thoreau said, “The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation.” (*Guess that lets the women off the hook.) Now I’ve decided to lead a life of “Cheerful Desperation!” And I have to say, that makes me feel liberated! “Disappointment is at the heart of the human experience,” says Alain de Botton, and for once it’s nice not to try and source my ‘suffering’ back to some imagined failing in my moral character or life’s track-record. Instead, I’m keeping an eye out for, “…many small, sweet things… a sunny day, a drifting cloud, dawn and dusk, a tender look…” and I’m quoting Alain there from that wonderful video, “The 8 Rules of Life.”
The Hubble Telescope was 30 years old this week, and one thing it teaches us is that we are somewhat reassuringly insignificant within the context of the majesty of Space and Time. Time to try less harder and give yourself space to, “Be More You!” (Thank you, Kim, for that!)
Here’s to a life of ordinariness wrapped in cheerful desperation, and free from the need to inject disinfectant into anything! Just chill.
Can you find 'treasure' in work you hate? Only if you put your heart into it! Working wholeheartedly is what the ancients suggested was the pathway to passion - discovering a passion for work you just can't stand. Of course, it helps to have a powerful 'Why'. Mother Teresa saw beyond her 'work' to the One Whom she loved most. You may work hard at a pointless or meaningless job IN ORDER TO serve your family. Love will always find the answer, the way, the truth. Only then can we enjoy Life to the full.
Photo by Natasa Grabovac on Unsplash Sound Effects from Freesound.org Music: Mozart produced from a MIDI file "Sons of Gladiator" by moi
Quoted from the blog on forgetting being good and choosing to be great instead...
I’ve made a commitment. I’ve realised I’ll never be the ‘good boy’ I thought I ought to be, but I can become ‘great’. I didn’t vote for Boris, and I’m pretty sure he’s not a good boy either, but he’s becoming a great leader. President Trump has certainly got an interesting history that would probably preclude him from being described as having been a ‘good boy’ but he’s doing a great job. And, sorry, but I’m no Royalist – nevertheless, I’m a fan of the ‘great’ job Her Majesty does.
We may not be good, but we can be great.
What about not being the beautiful kid on the block? What about not being picked for the team – or being last to be picked? What about not being popular? What about not being to Prom Queen or the Prom King? What about not being Captain of the team?
I get it at last after a long look in the mirror: I’m never going to be the ‘beautiful boy’ or the ‘beautiful girl’. But I’m going to become more like Dale and Amanda at work (not to say they aren’t beautiful). Both of them give me such a warm welcome at work that I feel like a prince. As such, they are both massively ‘attractive’. We may (or may not) be beautiful, but we can be attractive and make others feel great.
It’s fascinating that Jesus is described as having no outward appearance that we would find beautiful… and yet children flocked to Him. This means He was extremely attractive.
I think truly attractive people make us feel good about ourselves, which is why they are good to be around, whereas beautiful people can make us feel envious, we can admire them, we can want to be like them, but we feel less than them.
Attractive people make others feel great.
And before I draw to a conclusion, I want to say, I wouldn’t have had the breakthroughs I hope you are going to enjoy too unless I had spent time with my coach, Kim Searle. Let Kim help you “Be More You!”
And as for being brave – I think it is over-rated. I choose ‘courage’ instead. Courage can act when we still feel like wetting ourselves with fear. Courage is action from the heart.
That’s us then: Not bold but courageous; Not beautiful but attractive; Not good but becoming heroes.
Yes, maybe not ‘good’ but definitely ‘great’!
Final part of three on the subject of Motivation and Motivational Forces. Recorded on Easter Sunday, the theme flows into an offer from the Resurrected Jesus. Motivation is an 'inside job' - and I suggest there is a limitless Source of constant refreshment available to those who are thirsty.
Proverbs 9:1 says that Wisdom has built her house - she has hewn out her seven pillars...
...but what are those 7 pillars?
I share Kevin Whelan's original blueprint for building wealth and also the power of character to build a future.
[Editor's Note: previously uploaded without music]
This is a series on how you can stay motivated during challenging times when you may naturally feel demotivated!
We've got the fuel - now it's time to fill up and thrive!
The science of Motivational Mapping brings us a sustainable model for getting the flow of energy into our lives. There have been few moments in history where the human clans have needed motivation more! A common enemy and a shared experience of suffering are working together for our good, if we find the fuel to resist, to revolt, and to rise again - resurrection is ahead!
This is part two of what will certainly be a three-part series (and in all likelihood, a four-parter, as I promised this in the first recording!)
You can not only learn about how to become maximally motivated through mentoring with me, you can also discover your own, unique, motivational profile - an output we call your "Motivational Map."
If you'd like to discover more about yourself using Motivational Mapping, drop me a request in the comments and I'll connect with you.
Remember, "Love will always find the answer."
The powerful image is a photo by Adrian Swancar on Unsplash. The beautiful music is under licence from Shutterstock who are giving away a package at this time. It is entitled "MaterialMusic MindSpring."
The most wonderful choices are a thought away today. Today is YOUR DAY!
The first part of a series on the Motivation you and I need to get us through this unusual season of change. It will help you and your family, your friends, and, if you have them, your team. Based on the work of James Sale - inventor of Motivational Mapping.
Guided meditation intelligently designed to drive out fear by installing more of our inner perfected love.
Only to be listened to when you can sit undisturbed for the duration of this relaxation.
[Image Credit: Photo by Mayur Gala on Unsplash]
Are you living with feelings based on your vision of the future? I was! And because my vision wasn't a happy one, I wasn't feeling happy! Fortunately, I caught myself and interrupted the sinking thinking. Instead, I sat down and typed out 100 ways that my future could be better. Some of these were major changes to my circumstances, and others were tiny beneficial shifts. Well, folks, "shift happens," and my feelings shifted as I focused on the positive.
Here's a message of hope for the future of you, your business, and your customers. By co-creating a better future using psychogeometrics, mind mapping, thinkpen, and conversational intelligence, we can have confidence.
Join me for this relaxed Saturday night conversation.
A locus is a person, position, or place where something occurs or is situated.
Jesus is the locus of focus where miracles occur and where the answers to our prayers, our dreams, and our desires are situated. In Him, ALL the promises of God are answered, "Yes!" and our, "Amen!" is shouted to the glory of God! [2 Corinthians 1:20]
In these words of encouragement, we share how there are three loci of focus:
The Sensory Knowledge of Science and Circumstance The Sensory Knowledge of the evidence our body provides us with - the flesh The Revelation Knowledge that often supersedes sensory knowledge - the evidence of our senses and the rebellious declarations of science as to what is possible and what is impossible. Only one Locus of Focus will give us the answers we need.
Jesus.
[Image credit: Photo by Tim Marshall on Unsplash
ps. if you're feeling magnanimous, here's an opportunity: https://ko-fi.com/magnanimous
Yesterday evening kicked on the most fun and joyous of feast days in Judaism - Purim. Purim celebrates the survival and continuity of our Jewish friends, who, throughout history have faced almost impossible odds. If you are not Jewish, the day is an opportunity to celebrate your own resilience. It may be that you've faced illness, setbacks, and challenges emotionally, financially, socially, even spiritually. Let's celebrate together the fact that you're still here, wiser, stronger, more courageous.
It is traditional to give gifts on this feast day, so I have shared with you one of my most precious methods for memorising that which I need to action. It's called the Number-Rhyme system and is very easy to use.
Know that when you master it you won't have to get up in the middle of the night to write down your brilliant ideas!
Happy feasting!
Are you ready to quit? Stay! Are you ready to give up? Fight!! Are you ready to harden your heart? Give!!!
Here are lessons from Seneca and Wonder Woman, Stephen Covey, Roger Merrill, and the Apostle who wrote, "Love never fails..."
You are AMAZING - so much so that I call you, "Captain Amazing"! Well, Captain Amazing, I'm here to help you shine. If you desire more direction in your life, more energy to achieve your dreams and outcomes, a map to your best future, a pathway to prosperity... you get the picture.
As an ACCELERATED Coach, Mentor, and Trainer I help you get where you want to get to faster and more effectively (and, bluntly, more enjoyably.)
Listen to the podcast to find out how.
I Wandered Lonely as a Cloud BY WILLIAM WORDSWORTH [Celebrated by a visit to Kingston Lacy]
I wandered lonely as a cloud That floats on high o'er vales and hills, When all at once I saw a crowd, A host, of golden daffodils; Beside the lake, beneath the trees, Fluttering and dancing in the breeze.
Continuous as the stars that shine And twinkle on the milky way, They stretched in never-ending line Along the margin of a bay: Ten thousand saw I at a glance, Tossing their heads in sprightly dance.
The waves beside them danced; but they Out-did the sparkling waves in glee: A poet could not but be gay, In such a jocund company: I gazed—and gazed—but little thought What wealth the show to me had brought:
For oft, when on my couch I lie In vacant or in pensive mood, They flash upon that inward eye Which is the bliss of solitude; And then my heart with pleasure fills, And dances with the daffodils. ...
Music by Bach J.S Bach Suite No.1 in G Major BWV 1007 for piano
Narrated by Neil Alexander McKee
https://vimeo.com/394666564
I was so inspired last night by a local event with Evolve on the topic of Podcasting that I had an Aha! Aha! #1 was that I had The Perfect Face for Podcasting! Aha! #2 was that I could do a Breakfast Show Again! (Used to do two a week for Hope FM.)
Here's the structure: 1) Opening insight from Alexa (reframed by me for copyright reasons) 2) National Day of... 3) Theme of the Day - Friday is always POETS' Day (Pop Off Early, Tomorrow's Saturday) and we've got three poems today to make you smile or listen in awe of the greats. 4)Action for Happiness joyful tip of the day 5) Birthdays and SHOUT Outs to celebrate 6) What Are You Reading? Today sees the release of Bronwen Vearncombe's first book: "Building Your Dream Life." 7) Highpoint of the Day Before - which for me is Podcasting with Evolve 8) Alexa's joke of the day to finish with a smile... or a groan!
Fancy Bronwen's promise of "Building Your Dream Life"? You can buy and review it here: https://amzn.to/2I71wg4
That's an affiliate link but more importantly, I can connect you with Bronwen personally!
Until the next show... be excellent to one another and party on (or was that Bill & Ted?)
Look How Far...
Let's imagine a T-junction. To the left is the past. To the right is the future. To the left is happiness. To the right is unhappiness. That doesn't make sense, does it?
It makes even less sense when we realise that the natural tendency, in the example that follows, is to turn to the right every time.
No, it doesn't make sense, but it's the truth in one very important choice point – a T-Junction – we all face regularly on Life's many journeys each day.
The T-Junction in question is the choice on what to pay attention to as a comparison.
This week I put in two days' worth of hard labour to tidy up my working space, and seek to get Lady Penelope's lounge back in order. You see, I'm a NIGHTMARE to live with. I spread out, I'm messy, I leave stuff everywhere. I have always been this way. But this is Penelope's house. She's been phenomenally patient and yet I know 'enough is enough'!
Thus, I wholeheartedly put my shoulder to the task and just got on with it. I've made amazing progress, progress I am proud of. It's not there yet, but I was excited for Penelope to get home from work and look how far I'd come compared to how it was only two days ago.
Her response what not what I desired. She intimated that there was so much left to do. I felt deflated.
The T-Junction in question has two directions... To the left is "Look How Far I've Come." To the right is "Look How Far You've Yet to Go."
One promotes a motivating sense of happiness – of progress from the past to the present. The other, an overwhelming sense of so much left to do – from the present to the future. Guess which one is the more productive, motivating, happy direction to look in!
I say this today because you've come SO far.
Yes, your life is not perfect, and, no, my life isn't perfect either... BUT we've come such a long way. To think I was considering suicide only a few months ago – and on multiple occasions – and now I have 'everything' to live for. If I look how far I've come, I am delighted. But if I look to the right, and think about all the things I need yet to sort out, I can feel the energy and joy seeping away... along with my motivation to take action!
I've therefore decided to look left, to look how far I've come, and to rejoice in that. From that foundation of joy, I can take more steps forward knowing that I am moving forward.
Will you look how far you've come too?
Perhaps you'd share with us just how far you've come?
Lex A Moodscope member.
https://www.moodscope.com/blog/look-how-far
Laurence Dann interviews Lex McKee on the topic of 'Strategy'.
You can discover more strategic resources here: https://www.ldstrategy.co.uk/conversations/
The most important call to action I've ever issued...
...who will answer the call?
Original image: Photo by Patrick Brinksma on Unsplash - with thanks
Would you like 'more light' in your life? The solution is straightforward - uncover and open more windows! Like the picture that goes with this blog and podcast (with thanks for permission to use the photo by Miti on Unsplash), we often have occluded areas of our lives. Our friends (and enemies) can help us open these windows. One of them, we can choose to open ourselves thereby coming out of the darkness of the closet.
Listen to the podcast and read the blog to discover more!
SO YOU WANT TO READ FASTER... ...and with better concentration and higher comprehension?
Good. Science is here to help.
This is a binaural beat recording, designed to get your brain into an Accelerated Learning State ideal for Speed Reading.
WARNING - IT'S WEIRD. This only works when wearing headphones. Know for CERTAIN that is it not for everyone. If it gives you a headache, stop immediately. Know also for CERTAIN that is it only safe to use this mind-altering recording when you can sit with a book and don't need to attend to anything else other than learning.
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS I made this composite from several sources: 1) The binaural beats come from my Orion sound and light machine. Here's what they say about the programme: Programme 13 [Start Quote] Learning with Recordings 35 minutes
This session is specifically designed for use with language tapes. It uses the techniques pioneered by the Bulgarian researcher, Lozanov, called super-learning. It involves developing a state of relaxed and focused concentration. [End Quote]
2) MIDI files on Grieg and Beethoven, which I've scored in Ableton Live.
Alongside my thanks to ThoughtStream for the Orion programme, thanks also go to the image creator: Photo by Elijah O'Donnell on Unsplash
MIDI files are from Musescore.
Joy to Your World – the Monday Mindset Podcast for Moodscope
Joy is your strength. Joy is your birthright. Joy is your normal state of being - naturally.
So, what’s all this darkness then? It’s an invasion, and we need to repel it.
With three sons and now five grandchildren, I have a lot of opportunity to watch ‘natural’ states in the wild! There are many: Anger Surprise Sadness Wonder Excitement Confidence Curiosity Disgust Peace Fear Love Joy
I’m sure you can guess which of these lead towards freedom and which steal our liberty, which bring us pleasure, and which cause us pain
Today it is the turn of Joy to be in the spotlight.
Joy has a cousin called happiness – but happiness is from out-of-town. She comes from outside. Joy is part of the inner circle of the tribe. Or, to speak plainly, happiness (in my narrow definition) is a state that is dependent on what happens to us [extrinsic], and joy is an inside job [intrinsic]. Therein lies much hope for those of us facing dark days.
Honestly? I’m dancing with linguistics here – since Joy can ‘come’ from outside. For example, good news can bring us joy. A desire fulfilled can bring joy… but for the limited purpose of this blog, let’s focus on the aspect of joy that is an inner force that can light our way through darkness. If we were talking Star Wars, Joy is an aspect of the Light Side of the Force!
My own spiritual tradition believes that ‘Joy’ is a spiritual force for change – an aspect of the fruit of the spirit. It is said to be ‘full’ when in God’s presence. Knowing that this blog must resonate with all belief-systems, let’s consider where and when and with whom you feel most in touch with the ‘divine’ – or something ‘bigger’. If I share first that is only because I am writing this – I am far more interested in what your fuel-for-joy is – your recipe for Joy Juice!
Nature is the BIG ingredient for me. The joy I feel in seeing a flock of Long-Tailed Tits or a Nuthatch or Treecreeper! Laughter – especially of children is another huge component of Lex’s Joy Juice! And Music… so much power stored in associations with various compositions.
These are my celery, carrot, and onion for the best Stock!
I hope you’ll share your ingredients for Joy Juice.
However, there is a much deeper purpose to my focus upon joy today. Those who follow in my tradition also believe that joy is strength. When we go through the valleys of darkness, we need strength to continue. I want you to be stronger as a result of reading this today. How? By making up a batch and then taking a good dose of your own recipe for Joy Juice.
What’s it going to take for you to feel injoyment today?
Photo by Fuu J on Unsplash
btw the 'tone' used at the beginning and ending of this Podcast is 528 Hz - "The Love Frequency" associated with healing.
The Monday Mindset Blog and Podcast for Moodscope - with Lex McKee.
What are you motivated by? Are your batteries flat? Have they dropped out?!
Let's explore Motivation, Motivational Mapping, Motivational Maps - all with a view to opening the door to charging, re-charging, or even super-charging your energy!
AND if you'd like to discover your own unique Motivational Map, and then have a 1-to-1 debrief with me, leave a comment and we'll show you how to gain this advantage.
My friend and colleague, Martine Bolton, has just published, "Your Thinking is Your Superpower." I had an opportunity to catch up with Martine and record a little of her story behind writing the book, as well as capturing some of her empowering suggestions to releasing your own superpower thinking!
You can get a copy here: https://amzn.to/2QwuKdZ
If you're of a certain age, you will remember the love and passion that went into recording a cassette mixtape for a friend or someone you were in love with! Isn't it time we fell back in love with ourselves? Of course it is! For this reason, I'm recommending that we 'record' a new mixtape full of positive affirmations that help us believe that all things are possible - that, in fact, nothing is impossible for those who believe.
Thanks to Siska Redman for the picture of me in a thoughtful moment at Kingston Lacy. Have guitar, will play!
My friend Sam is a Master of Mindset. He is able to stay positive and resourceful even in negative and adverse circumstances by using a technique called 'reframing'. Reframing literally re-frames the meaning we ascribe and attach to events, behaviours, and circumstances to make them mean something that will empower us and keep us resourceful. You can learn how to make 'Shift Happen' by applying reframing to your own experiences!
Calling all the heroes... here's a wake-up call from the future. In today's podcast we bring a message from the future. We also explore The Dan Sullivan Question, the question that shows whether or not you have a future. Plus, PsychoGeometrics to determine your most effective pathway to the future of your dreams.
Enjoy the "Transforming Tuesdays" podcast from Becoming Heroes.
Investing in someone else's emotional wellbeing is the best investment ever. Maya Angelou said people always remember how we made them feel. This podcast focuses on the might three: 1) Faith 2) Hope 3) Love If we can help people have more confidence (faith) in themselves, if we can give them hope from a brighter future, and if we can leave them feeling loved, respected, cherished, then we will have done well.
The original picture is from Unsplash Photo by Sydney Sims on Unsplash
If you are going to attract or join an authentic tribe, your 'Creation Story' must resonate with their values, their mission, and perhaps even the path that they have walked or are walking.
In this frank account of my own story so far, I share how I came to believe in what I hold to be of prime importance, and why I am committed to helping people just like you 'become the hero you were meant to be'.
If you'd like to subscribe to the Becoming Heroes YouTube Channel, here's a link: http://bit.ly/YouTubeBecomingHeroes
Have your fears ever lied to you? I bet they have. They mean well (I think)but lock most of us in a prison that restricts us to achieving a mere fraction of our potential.
Knowing how untruthful my fears have proven to be, I jumped at the chance to do a Firewalk with Sam Dyer as my Trusted Guide.
Here's the story of what this meant to me, and what it could come to mean for you too.
Vitality is a great word - how would you like to FEEL more ALIVE today? Feeling great, feeling more alive, is easier than you might think. In just seven steps you can measurably improve your sense of vitality. Move a little more. Feed on something good for you. Teach someone else something powerful that you've learned. Let go of something that is holding you back or holding you down. Learn something new. Breathe more deeply - more intentionally. Increase your sensitivity to someone else, to what is going on in your environment, and to yourself. What suggestions do you have under these seven headings?
Go Where You Are Looking – the Monday Moodscope Blog
“Look where you’re going!” may have been something you’ve heard time and time again throughout life, but my friend Tim used to go where he was looking! When he first passed his driving test, travelling out with him was an adventure not fit for the faint-hearted. He had an uncanny tendency to point the car in the direction he was looking.
In the daytime, this meant veering towards ditches at the side of the road… but at night, it meant heading straight towards the oncoming headlights! Of course, he corrected his trajectory each time before tragedy hit, but it was a thrilling ride for his passengers!
Scent may be the most powerful sense for memory but when it comes to neurological real estate, the brain is committed to vision! How you feel, what you believe (‘seeing is believing’ for example), the decisions you make, the actions you take – and thus the results you get – are all heavily influenced by what you see. And when I say, “…by what you see,” I mean with your physical vision and with the vision of your imagination – the mind’s eye.
It looks like our direction in life comes down (often) to the fact that we go where we are looking. Sadness is often described as, “looking down.” When our circumstances change for the better, we say, “Things are looking up!” Let’s lift our eyes to brighter times ahead.
So how can we stack the odds of a better future in our favour?
Three ways at least…
1) Firstly, The Writing’s on the Wall Supermarkets place their products in a deliberate position to capture our attention, how much better to buy into a brighter vision of our future by choosing to place our dreams and visions at eye-level? Have a vision wall and put on it pictures of places you’d like go, people you’d like to strengthen your relationships with, and even things you’d like to own.
2) Secondly, Dream Saver – Screen Saver I use my computer’s random screen saver to remind me of what I dream of. It’s a brilliant way to give my heart an uplifting nudge in the right direction. I have quotations and images to inspire me.
3) Thirdly, Write the vision down When you get really serious about this, the gurus (like Dan Sullivan – of Strategic Coach, and Brian Tracy) recommend you physically re-write what you desire each and every day! This re-loads your positive intentions into your working memory ready to spot opportunities in the day ahead.
All these three keep what we would prefer to experience in life, “in sight, in mind,” rather than, “out of sight, out of mind.” They keep them front of mind.
Where there is no vision we can go astray – we can wander and drift aimlessly. Instead, let’s work with our brain to build a better future. Perhaps then, we can live the life we have imagined and go where we are looking.
Image credit: Photo by Alexandru Zdrobău on Unsplash
Whom can you trust? When we've been hurt by others, it can be all too easy to put up barriers and pull down the shutters. We do this to protect ourselves but it also cuts us off from kind people who genuinely want to help. In this podcast I encourage all listeners to stay 'Open All Hours' even if they need to ban certain 'friends' from the shop!
A call to action - to take control of what you can on LinkedIn. The Algorithm will and should remain an ever-changing mystery - which puts it in the Circle of Concern, not even in the Circle of Influence, and most definitely not in the Circle of Control.
What we can control is the look and feel of our profile and company page. We can control the content we share. We can control how much we share.
Taking a lesson from a long-overdue tooth-extraction, I ask what do we know we have in our lives that is also overdue for an exit strategy!
Hitchhiking to Happiness is the title I'd like to use for a book. Here's the blog where the idea has first been expressed. My main intended meaning is that to discover happiness - either on the journey or as a destination - we need to travel together. We also need to travel with people whose gifts and talents and perspectives differ from our own. A hitchhiker and the person giving them a lift often share the same destination, but they bring different resources to the shared-journey. I need you, you need me... and that's the way it should be. The blog and this podcast gives thanks to the hundreds of Moodscope members who have been generous with their encouraging comments over the years. We've come a long way together, and it is good to say thank you for that support. Together we are stronger.
Published on a Tuesday, our reframe of the word 'Tuesday' is 'ChooseDay'. This is to make it one day a week where we consciously make intentional choices. This is all part of living life 'deliberately' - on purpose. I want to be a part of making your life better, bigger, brighter, bolder. To do that, I have made the choice to choose friendship over financial gain. In this podcast, I share my discomfort over the number of professional colleagues who have chosen the opposite. We explore the consequences of this poor decision. I also talk about how you can benefit from discovering your unique talent, buidling your team, clarifying your message, and choosing the right media channel to publish that message. Together, we can live the life we have imagined!
Mindset, Mental Health, and Moodscope are great allies in our quest to become heroes. The programmes we run between our ears, and the results we achieve are directly linked.
Nearly every Monday, Moodscope.com publishes one of my mindset blogs designed to encourage you, to give you fresh energy, direction, and momentum. Today's blog is about making friends with the word, "Don't!" Its utterance can become a call to action to ask yourself: "What would I prefer to DO?"
Enjoy the podcast - it's a good investment of 3 minutes of your attention! Don't forget to comment!!!
What does "Becoming Heroes" have to do with mental well-being? Everything! Many entrepreneurs and artists I meet seem to be particularly prone to loneliness and even depression. Since our mindset and self-belief are prime drivers of the success of our businesses, it is important to look after our mental health. This is one reason why I have been very open about my own battle with depression, and also why I write a blog for Moodscope.com - published on the majority of Mondays throughout the year. This blog helps us flip our attention from a negative frame to a positive one by asking a set of four questions: What would I rather have? What would I rather be? What would I rather do? What would I rather give?
The written blog had a wonderful response on Moodscope. If you sign up (it's free) you can join the discussion and read the comments. Together we can create a bigger, better, brighter, and bolder future... but we need one another!
Bigger, better, brighter - our world can become even more amazing if we change the way we think about it! Sustainable transformation begins with a change of mind - innovative thinking that didn't exist before.
In this, my most revolting podcast so far, I suggest there are areas we would benefit from changing the way we think about them.
Who, in their right mind, would see slavery as anything but 'wrong'? Yet only a few decades ago, this great evil was seen as necessary for the economic wellbeing of those who exploited others. Minds changed, culture was transformed, and history became bigger, better, brighter.
Are you ready to change your future by changing your mind? If so, you can become revolting too - you can become more of a hero!
I write and record a blog for Moodscope.com most Mondays. These are always on a mindset theme with the goal of encouraging all who listen. We can be transformed when we change the way we think about life, and this is the mission of each blog and podcast - to help life become that little bit brighter, bigger, better. Today's theme is about staying open to opportunities. It's about not reading the worst possible consequences into situations where something goes wrong, and also about not becoming complacent when life goes well. Let's enjoy each moment. What the caterpillar regards as the end of the world, the butterfly embraces as only the beginning!
As your business grows, so also will the complexity. Time will become an ever more critical factor - you simply won't have enough hours in the day to get stuff done.
This is where a trusted professional network comes in. In this 9 and half minute podcast, taken from our blog, we learn a little more about Commercial Funding and how to avoid the pain of making the wrong funding decision. We also learn that GDPR is here to stay and how to preclude the perils of getting on the wrong side of the ICO.
Your mental wellbeing is my priority. Whilst we have podcasts on productivity and personal development, the foundation is always going to be mindset. This podcast shares the joy we can experience when we learn something new. The great news is that learning something life-enhancing doesn't have to take long. I give examples of two beneficial discoveries I've made in less than two minutes each. However, the most important message in this recording is an invitation to you for you to share your own 'Aha!' moments where you've learned something that helps you live happier ever after!
Unless you manage your patterns of thinking very carefully, they will default to a critical assessment of cause and effect - the word 'because' used in a discouraging way! When things happen in my life that are not good, my (undisciplined) mind jumps immediately into blame mode. This is purely because I have allowed my mind to think in this way. You and I can change our minds just as easily as we can change friends. This very brief podcast continues the process of transformation by turning the word 'because' to better use! Because you're worth it!
Your wisdom is unique to you. No one has lived your life. No one has shared your exact experiences. No one has interpreted those experiences as you have, nor has anyone learned the same lessons.
What if you were to write your experiences out like a book of the Bible? Your name would be the book's title, and you could give the chapters titles. In this short, five-minute podcast, that goes with the blog on the subject, I explain how Penny has been creating insights one thought at a time, one day at a time.
This Monday Mental Health blog is written for moodscope.com Moodscope is an amazing resource, available free for those who don't want the more sophisticated metrics available in the paid-for version.
I write the blog for publication on most Mondays - and like to create a podcast too so that I can pour more feeling into what I've written.
If you feel low, or if you know someone who does, you're not alone. 25% of the population in the UK will suffer from Mental Health setbacks at least once in their life. It's good to know that there are free resources to draw upon.
Today's blog is about using our "I like it" spectacles to view the world, and to feel better in seconds by cultivating a sense of gratitude throughout the day.
What is a mental health episode doing on The Productive Prosperity Podcast? Mental health, alongside physical health, is one of the greatest forces to boost or hinder productivity. Today's podcast is not overtly on productivity, but it reflects the fact that every Monday, I write a blog as a member of Moodscope.com This blog is to support other members (and myself) with an uplifting post that will give us some energy to face the challenges of the day. This podcast is 100% relevant to moving forward in life against opposition. The message is clear - we are at a disadvantage if we try this alone; together, we are stronger. Whenever you feel low, check out the free version of Moodscope (Moodscope.com) and consider joining not just for your sake but also as a buddy to help others. The magic of the Roman Testudo formation was that it only needed each member to look after one or two other for the whole unit to succeed.
If you are enjoying good, robust mental health today, I'm willing to guess that this is in part because of having good support. Take today's podcast as a reminder to say, "Thank You!" to those who have shielded you when you've been through tough times.
Oh, by the way, it's not just about tough times. The Testudo was strong enough to ride a chariot across. This meant it could be used to lift up others to continue their journey - the Testudo standing in the gap!
The third in my series on Living More Productively and Living Productivity examines the third of seven aspects of the model for life. This is reproduction. How can we go about reproducing our gifts and talents through coaching, training, teaching, and mentoring? Drawing on the wisdom of Situational Leadership, Psycho-Geometrics, and with reference to Dan Sullivan's Strategic Coach programme, we come up with the Shape Cycle as a model for learning and development. We always rememer that we can choose the shape were are in.
Shinrin-Yoku or 'Forest Bathing' is popular in Japan and South Korea as a simple route to lowering blood pressure and increasing focus, concentration, and wellbeing.
In episode 2 of our mini-series on "Living Productively" or, if you prefer, "Living Productivity", we turn the focus of our attention on to "Nutrition." Nutrition is our fuel - fuel to energise our metabolism. Get the fuel right and the energy boost is amazing. Mess up your energy and the outputs - the productivity - flounder. Whether we flounder or flourish depends on discovering our flow, building our flow team, making the right choices with our time, and using the right tech to accelerate our progress.
10 minutes of practical insights on how to live life more productivity by enhancing and increasing the amount of movement in your life.
In less than three minutes, a summary of what I offer folks (taken from my LinkedIn Summary section.) All my key links are available here: https://linktr.ee/theprosperoustribe
Sensory Marketing is exactly what you expect: harnessing the 5 gateways of the senses as channels for our marking messages to flow through. This episode explores three uses of sensory marketing: 1) to enhance the customer's journey - adding sensory layers to their experience of the environment, the purchase, and the delivery 2) brand-sense - picking single sensory triggers to associate with our brand (such as the scent you wear, the font you use, your style) 3) Sensational Business - how senses can become part of the tribal identity.
How can we produce a 100x improvement in productivity? That's one hundred times, not one hundred percent. It's 10,000 percent! 10,000%!!! At first, I thought it was unlikely, if not impossible. Then I started doing the mathematics. If you follow our curriculum and systems, you 'only' need a 2,500% improvement in productivity in four areas. Collectively, you'll then get your 10,000% improvement. The four areas are: 1) Training 2) Talent, Team, Tribe 3) Time Management 4) Tech - being the harnessing of Technology AND Techniques. I now conclude that 100x improvement in productivity is doable!
To 10x your current level of prosperity, you can leverage the power available through becoming the leader in your field in technical skills, build a team that accentuates your own flow, work on investing your time only in that which enhances your flow, and automating your sales, marketing, and some of your servicing through technology. Of course, having the sounding board of a great coach and mentor is only going to accelerate your progress - especially when that mentor has access to all the techniques you need to lead the field!
This Monday Moodscope Mindset podcast and blog was inspired by Rachel Kelly in her charming book, "Walking on Sunshine." Highly Recommended!
Whilst Rachel also uses handwashing as a cue to be mindful, the title "Reboot Ritual" and the personal story are true to me!
Chris Wilkinson FCIPD, Managing Director of Expert HR Solutions Ltd, continues walking us through "The Employee's Journey." In this podcast, we cover some of the essential insights and information all businesses should be aware of when it comes to team-members leaving an organisation.
With well over 100,000 employee tribunals each year, you can be assured that this information is worth having at the forefront of your recruitment strategy. I was struck, once again, by how important it is for smaller businesses, who cannot afford their own full-time Human Resources expert, to have access to experts like Chris.
Podcast using the audio from my seven-part video series on accelerated learning. My ambition is to recruit trainers and teachers to accelerate the learning revolution that is already happening in our schools, our homes, our colleges, our communities, and in our corporations. Join me. Join us. Create the future.
This is the final part of our 3 part episode with Ian Skinner on "The Magic of Mentoring."
The second part of our TBN Tuesday Podcast with Ian Skinner, on the subject of "The Magic of Mentoring."
Here, you'll get some insights into Ian's phenomenal track record.
When we predict the future, we can choose the mission we embrace to add value to that predicted future.
This Podcast shares strategies for managing energy and time. Just like muscle development requires three factors to develop more capacity, so also can learning, emotional intelligence, and spiritual development. The three factors are some kind of preparation to warm-up, a sprint that takes us outside our comfort zone, then the essential recovery time that so many people outside of atheletics forget.
Sam Dyer, Harley Street NLP practitioner, challenges members of The Boardroom Network to push outside of our comfort zones and embrace a level of healthy stress. In this podcast, Sam makes a fascinating claim that hate and love share the same biochemical signature in the brain. He also showcases the use of an app from menti.com that allows live voting during the presentation. Whilst we can't see this on the podcast, I've left that portion of the audio in so that you can get a sense of the real-time impact of audience participation.
Networking is Marketing - this is s the bold assertion of Tom Hadley, member of The Boardroom Network. As such, our networking needs a strategy and a set of processes as robust as those we'd plan and implement for any other kind of marketing. We must be memorable, follow up, but also be increasingly savvy when it comes to using our data creatively and effectively.
The more choices you have, the more powerful you feel. And the way you feel is really important to your sense of well-being, and to the functioning of your immune system. It pays to feel good! Film-makers make use of multiple angles to tell their stories. If you'd like to enjoy a richer Life Story, make sure you add more angles, positions, and perspectives to your Life.
Audio version of the Monday Mindset blog for 18th February 2019. Today's topic: the power of words to change our state of mind and our future. The full blog is here: http://bit.ly/magicofwords
Chris Wilkinson has had an adventurous career - culminating in becoming one of the most respected experts in Human Resources in the South of England. He's well known for his one-to-one meetings after events held by The Boardroom Network (in Dorset, Hampshire, and Wiltshire, UK). If you've ever wondered what it would be like to have a one-to-one with a chap who has such a wealth of experience to share, wonder no more! Here is my one-to-one on the subject of The Employee Journey. Enjoy the benefits of insights that could save you a fortune. Now, an offer - send me your HR questions, and I'll pose them to Chris the next time we meet (which is often!)
Recorded, with Paul Dunn's permission, at the "Fast Forward Summit 2017" with Roger Hamilton. Paul shares the "Buy One Give One" vision and how you can get involved too. Together we can make a difference.
This is an unusual recording in that it uses binaural microphones that I was wearing in my ears. This will give you a sense of what it is like "being there" - sitting next to the very enthusiastic Julie Hogbin!
Check our www.B1G1.com as soon as you're ready to get involved - and there's an app too!