Forever Marriage Podcast: Recent Episodes
Scott & Dawn Smith
Welcome to the Forever Marriage Podcast! Forever Marriage at Lakewood exists to strengthen families by helping couples discover God’s design for marriage. One of our hopes for the FM Podcast is to provide Biblically based marital advice from experienced marriage counselors, Scott and Dawn Smith, who have been working with couples for 20+ years!
In Season 5 Episode 2 of the Forever Marriage Podcast, we talk about how if we want to rekindle romance, the first thing we have to do is to "remember what’s good about our mate."
We can’t experience romance with a hard heart and so we must consider how to have a soft heart toward one another. We must work on how we see each other, how we think about each other, and how we speak to each other.
Our way of seeing each other matters. Dawn says, "I have to have a filter for how I see my husband… and that comes from a biblical worldview that I have adopted. We relate to each other through the lens of these three unchanging truths - as an image bearer of a holy God, as a child of God, and as an heir with Jesus. These are identity statements that do no change. We then are privileged to fulfill the roles of husband or wife."
How we view each other and how we understand our own identity empowers us to fulfill those roles as husband or wife in a way that honors the Lord and keeps our marriage growing and thriving.
Thoughts to ponder:
- What attributes have you been focusing on lately with your partner?
- Are they identity or role based?
- In what ways has that driven your affections for them (for good or for bad)?
If we want to rekindle romance, the first thing we have to do is remember what’s good about our mate.
Scripture References:
- Proverbs 18:22, Proverbs 17:22, Proverbs 11:27, Genesis 1:26-27, John 1:12-13, Romans 8:16-17
Welcome to Season 5 of the Forever Marriage Podcast!If you're new with us, welcome to the show! My name is Emily Lavender and I'm joined by Scott & Dawn Smith. We are on staff at Lakewood Baptist Church in Gainesville, GA, and we are excited that you have tuned in! This is a marriage podcast where we hope you'll be encouraged to grow deeper in your understanding of God's design for marriage. You'll be equipped with practical action steps for your marriage, but you're also bound to have some good laughs along with us as we share from our own experiences.
If you've been tracking with us in our previous seasons, we are so glad you're still with us! Of course, you know Scott loves to teach through an acrostic... SO, in this episode, we introduce the one we'll be working through this season - how to Rekindle R.O.M.A.N.C.E. in marriage.
We'll consider questions like - What is romance? How do we "rekindle" the romance in our marriage if it's gone away? What does the Bible say about romance?
In this episode you’ll hear…
- A quick summer recap
- Scott’s snacking experiences
- Gainesville fit club promo
- Rekindle romance blog
- What romance is
- And a sneak peak into where we are headed this season
Stay tuned for Episode 2, where we talk about the first way to rekindle romance, which is to remember what's good about your mate.
In Season 4 Episode 17 of the Forever Marriage Podcast, we conclude this series with the final One Another of Scripture - Forgive One Another. In Ephesians 4:32, Paul says, "Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ forgave you." The measuring stick for how we are to forgive is how God forgave us. SO in this episode we talk about what forgiveness IS NOT and what forgiveness IS.
Consider as you listen to today's episode: Is there are particular person in your life that your heart is calloused or hard hearted toward?
Mentioned in this episode:
- Scripture: Ephesians 4:25-32, Romans 5:8, Romans 6:11, James 5:16, 1 Corinthians 13:5, Psalm 103:11-12, 1 John 1:9
- Anger Train: Hurt > Anger > Bitterness > Resentment > Wrath > Revenge > Psychosomatic Disorders
- Ruth Bell Graham quote: "A good marriage consists of two good forgivers."
In Season 4 Episode 16 of the Forever Marriage Podcast, we continue to talk about Scripture's imperative to love one another, and specifically about love's empowerment and love's teacher.1 Thessalonians 3:12 says, "and may the Lord cause you to increase and abound in love for one another, and for all men, just as we also do for you."
Can you recall a time when you knew with certainty that God was empowering your ability to love someone that was unlovely? Love is based on His love for us and not the other person's loveliness. Our ability or inability to love others as God loves them is a testament to our growth and maturity in Christ. It is also a testimony to an unbelieving world of the reality and power of the gospel.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Scripture: Luke 6:32, 1 Thess. 3:12, 1 Thess. 4:9, 1 John 3:1, Romans 13:8, 1 John 4:12, Ephesians 4:32
In Season 4 Episode 15 of the Forever Marriage Podcast, we continue our talk about Scripture's imperative to love one another. We started this conversation in the previous episode, but we pick back up with it in today's episode.
As we can see in Scripture, love is a command and not a suggestion. Why would Jesus command us to love one another? What does this mean for marriage? We talk about how it can be a challenge to love sometimes. But love is based on Christ's example, and not whether the person has earned it or not, or upon whether we feel like giving it. And finally, our love for one another is a demonstration of the reality and power of the Gospel.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Scripture: John 13:34-35, John 15:12, John 15:17, 2 John 5, Luke 6:32, 1 Peter 4:8, Psalm 103:11-12, Proverbs 11:27
- Register today for the 6 week study Rekindle R.O.M.A.N.C.E. beginning April 10.
- Blue Letter Bible
In Season 4 Episode 14 of the Forever Marriage Podcast, we talk about Scripture's imperative to love one another.
But first, by way of teaser for tomorrow night's event, Forever Marriage LIVE, we talk about what romance is and what it is not. We will gather tomorrow night at 6PM at Lakewood Baptist Church to hear Scott & Dawn talk about how to Rekindle R.O.M.A.N.C.E. It's not too late to register! We hope you will join us for this fun filled date night experience, where you will be equipped with tools to help you and spouse keep the love light burning!
Back to our episode. Very simply, what is love? How do we measure love? What does God's word say about love? Jesus, in John 13:34 says, "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, also love one another." So what does this look like for us in marriage? Tune in to this week's episode to hear a discussion on this one another of Scripture.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Mr. Darcy in Pride and Prejudice reference in our discussion about romance
- Scripture: John 13:34, John 15:12, John 15:17, 1 John 4:11, 1 John 5:2, 1 John 3:1, John 13:35
- Complete list of the One Another's of Scripture
In Season 4 Episode 13 of the Forever Marriage Podcast, we cover the last 3 ways of the 10 ways to outdo one another in showing honor.First, we talk about seeking the good for one another. Out of honor for God and honor for your spouse, can you seek their good?
Next, we talk about stimulating one another to love and good deeds. Familiarity in marriage can breed complacency and indifference, so we must give some forethought for how we can stimulate, or spur on, one another.
Finally, we talk about submitting to one another. Submission is given because we love and revere Christ. Our culture views submission negatively. It's seen as "lording over someone to press them down." Biblical submission says, "I come under you to lift you up. I want to help you experience God's fullness in your life. I want for you what God wants for you."
Consider: Of the 10 ways to outdo one another in showing honor, which one struck you most? What do you believe God now wants you to do in obedience? If you need to go back and listen again, we covered the 10 ways in episodes 8-13.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Scripture: 1 Thessalonians 5:15, 5:11, 1 Corinthians 10:24, Philippians 2:3-4, Proverbs 3:27, Romans 12:17, Hebrews 10:24-25, Ephesians 5:21-23, Luke 2:51
In Season 4 Episode 12 of the Forever Marriage Podcast, we talk about not judging one another. In Romans 14:13, Paul says, "Therefore let us not judge one another anymore, but rather determine this - not to put an obstacle or a stumbling block in a brother's way." We tend to judge those who don't think, believe, feel, act or behave the way we do. Why is that? Oftentimes, we are uncomfortable with differences.
We also talk about praying for one another. James 5:16 says, "Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, so that you may be healed. The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much." Why would James tie together the concepts of confession of sin and prayer for one another as a means of healing?
Mentioned in this episode:
- Scripture: Romans 2:1-3, Matthew 7:1-5, James 5:16, Psalm 32:3, Psalm 51:4, 1 Corinthians 6:19-20, Ephesians 5:13
- The Power of a Praying Wife by Stormie Omartian
In Season 4 Episode 11 we talk about being hospitable to one another and how hospitality is a way of honoring one another. 1 Peter 4:9 says, "Be hospitable to one another without complaint." So, why would hospitality evoke complaints from us? The nature of hospitality is driven by a spirit of generosity - of heart, home, friendship, etc. Oftentimes, it takes effort, time, and energy to welcome someone with open arms into your space. We have to fight against our natural sin tendencies of "I don't want to do that right now."
Questions to consider:
So, as a couple, how are you doing with regard to hospitality?
What is the benefit to your marriage when you practice hospitality?
Mentioned in this episode:
- Register for Forever Marriage LIVE - Friday, March 22 at 6 PM at Lakewood Baptist Church
- Rekindle ROMANCE 6 week study on Wednesday nights led by Scott & Dawn (Registration coming soon!)
- The Gospel Comes with a House Key by Rosaria Butterfield
- Scripture: Romans 12:10, 1 Peter 4:9, Romans 12:13, 1 Corinthians 11:33, 1 Corinthians 13:5, Romans 15:7
In Season 4 Episode 10 we pick up with comfort one another. Our comfort of others will often come from God's grace, mercy and healing of our own personal pain. The gift of having a spouse is the comfort they can bring to us in marriage like no one else can.
Questions to consider as you listen to today's episode:
1. Are you more concerned about your own pain? Or are you looking to your spouse's needs as more important than your own?
2. How are you doing in comforting your partner? Rate yourself on a scale of 1-10.
3. What practical steps can you take to grow in this area of comforting your spouse?
4. Consider asking your spouse these questions: How can I help you? What do you need from me?
Mentioned in this episode:
- Scripture: Romans 12:10, 2 Corinthians 1:3-6, 1 Peter 3:7, Psalm 34:19
- Mark your calendars! On March 22, 2024 we will host our first ever Forever Marriage LIVE. We hope you'll make plans to join us for this fun, one night event!
In Season 4 Episode 9 we are continuing the conversation of what it means to be devoted to one another and we are unpacking 10 ways to outdo one another in showing honor. We began this conversation in S4E8 where we covered the first way, and we continue on with the second and third ways in this episode:
- Bearing One Another's Burdens (S4E8)
- Building One Another Up
- Caring for One Another
Questions to consider as you listen to today's episode:
1. How are you and your spouse building one another up?
2. What has my attitude been toward my spouse lately?
3. How have I most recently used my words? To build up or tear down?
Mentioned in this episode:
- Scripture: Romans 12:10, 1 Thessalonians 5:11, Proverbs 18:21, Psalm 19:14, 1 Corinthians 12:24-25, Proverbs 21:21
- Gary Chapman's The Five Love Languages
In Season 4 Episode 8 of the Forever Marriage Podcast, we talk about what it means to be devoted to one another. Devotion is somewhat of a mixture of affection and commitment. In the early church, devotion was a binding element. And in marriage, this concept of being devoted to one another is crucial. Romans 12:10 says, "Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to now another in honor." (NASB) The ESV renders it this way, "Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor." In this episode and the following we unpack 10 ways to outdo one another in showing honor.
The first is to bear one another's burdens. Some practical ways that a husband and wife can bear one another's burdens include praying for one another, listening to one another, taking a task off the other person, etc.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Scripture: Romans 12:10, Matthew 23:11, Matthew 20:16, Galatians 6:2
- For Men Only and For Women Only by Shaunti Feldhahn
In Season 4 Episode 7 of the Forever Marriage Podcast, we continue to talk about the pursuit of peace and the 'so far as it depends on you' portion of Romans 12:18. We must ask ourself this question: What part do I play in the pursuit of peace? And the answer is 'My part. Not the other person's part.'
We also take a look at Matthew 5:9 where Jesus says, "Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God." Notice, he didn't say 'peacekeepers.' There is an important difference that we unpack in this episode.
After listening to today's episode, consider this:
Is there unrest between you and someone else? If so, what is your role in seeking peace?
Mentioned in this episode:
- Scripture: Psalm 26:2, Psalm 139:23-24, Hebrews 4:15-16, Psalm 34:14, Matthew 5:9, James 1:19-20, Ephesians 5:21, Ephesians 4:15
In Season 4 Episode 6, we talk about the pursuit of peace. Paul says in Romans 12:18, "If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men." Notice in this verse, Paul gives two conditions to the pursuit of peace - 1)If possible and, 2) So far as it depends on you. We consider the 'if possible' portion of the verse and talk about how at times in may be impossible to be at peace with another person. You may have done everything God ask of you to make things right, but the person still chooses to be at odds with you. So what do you do?
Mentioned in this episode:
- Scripture: Hebrews 12:14, Romans 12:18, Psalm 133:1, Hebrews 11:1, Philippians 4:9
- Fun little plug about diagramming sentences and prepositions for all you English/Language Arts people out there
- AND two of our most favorite Thanksgiving recipes
In Season 4 Episode 5, we talk about what it means to be at peace with one another. Paul says in Romans 12:18, "If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men."
What is peace? And why do you believe peace is such a crucial part to marriage? What effect does a person not being at peace with God have on their marriage? We talk about these things and more on this week's episode of the FM Podcast.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Romans 12:18, 1 Thessalonians 5:13, Philippians 2:5, Romans 5:1, Colossians 3:15-16, Philippians 4:9, John 14:27, Galatians 5:22-23, Mark 9:50, Matthew 5:13, Luke 14:34-35
If after listening to this episode, you'd like to talk more with someone from our team, you can email us at elavender@lakewoodlife.org.
In Season 4 Episode 4, we continue our discussion of what it means to regard one another. We specifically talk about the mindset required to properly regard one another in the way God would have us - and this has everything to do with humility. What is humility of mind? And what is not humility of mind?
Mentioned in this episode:
- Scripture: Philippians 2:3-4, John 1:13, Proverbs 16:2, Colossians 2:10, 1 Peter 5:6; Not mentioned, but for further study: Romans 15:7, 1 Corinthians 11:33, 12:24-25, Galatians 6:2, Colossians 3:12-13, 3:16, James 5:16, 1 Peter 5:14
- Neil Anderson's Who I Am In Christ
- Christ Be All by Grace Worship
In Season 4 Episode 3, we discuss what it means to regard one another. Within each one of us runs an unconscious refrain of, " I want what I want, when I want it, no questions asked..." So how do we move from selfishness to selflessness? How do we honor our spouse? How can we practically consider our spouse more important than ourself?
In this episode we take a deep dive into Paul's instruction in Philippians 2:3-4 where he says, "Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind let each of you regard one another as more important than himself; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others."
In Season 4 Episode 2, we continuing discussing what it looks like to accept one another. In marriage though, it doesn't take long to figure out the many differences you may have with your spouse. If differences aren't handled wisely, they can divide you. Differences are intended by God to create bridges between you, not barriers. They can actually be used by God to strengthen your marriage, not weaken it.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Scripture: Romans 15:7, Romans 5:5, Ephesians 5:25, Galatians 6:1-2, Romans 14:13, 1 John 1:8-10, Luke 7:47
- The Cost of Discipleship by Dietrich Bonhoeffer
In this episode, we kick off Season 4 of the Forever Marriage Podcast! This season Scott and Dawn are talking about the "One Anothers of Scripture." These statements from Jesus, Paul, John, Peter, Luke, Mark and James were both descriptive and to some extent prescriptive of how our life together as a body of believers should be formed and lived out.
As a Christian, married couple, your spouse is the first believer you wake up to and have the opportunity to practice these "One Anothers of Scripture" with. In today's episode we talk about accepting one another. Paul says in Romans 15:7, "Wherefore, accept one another, just as Christ also accepted us to the glory of God."
What does it mean to accept someone?
Why is it difficult sometimes to accept one another?
How did Christ accept us?
Mentioned in the episode:
- Scripture: Romans 15:7, 1 John 3:1, Romans 5:8, Ephesians 4:32
- PDF download of One Another of Scripture list
In Season 3 Episode 17, we bring Season 4 to a close. In our FINISH WELL acrostic, we look at the last to 'Ls' - Learn for All of Life and Live With the End in Mind.
Those who want to FINISH WELL never stop learning and have a teachable spirit. They learn from reading, from watching and listening to others, and from life itself. Keys to maintaining a teachable spirit are humility and responsive obedience.
They also live with the end in mind. They live each day with a lifelong perspective. Psalm 90:12 says, "So teach us to number our days, that we may present to you a heart of wisdom."
Questions to consider:
- What are you presently reading, watching or listening to in order to finish well. Are these going to help you finish well? Do you need to make any course corrections?
- If you could orchestrate it today, what would you want the end of your life to look like?
- What would you want people to say at your funeral?
- How would you want to be remembered?
- What impact would you have wanted to make?
- Is your life in its present state pointing people to Jesus or away from him?
Mentioned in this episode:
- 70's show references: Fantasy Island and The Love Boat (We said we'd include it, so here it is for your viewing pleasure!)
- Scripture: 1 Peter 5:5, 2 Timothy 4:13, Psalm 34, Psalm 90:12
In Season 3 Episode 16, we continue talking about how those who want to FINISH WELL establish sustainable habits. In our previous 2 episodes we talked about spiritual, relational & vocational habits and in this episode we talk about physical and financial habits.
Those who want to FINISH WELL, establish healthy physical habits which include getting adequate sleep, eating wisely, and engaging in regular exercise. Good financial habits to establish include regularly giving the Lord's tithe, paying yourself next, and living within your means.
To consider: What course corrections would you like to make based on our discussion of sustainable habits?
Mentioned in this epsisode:
- Scripture: Psalm 16:7, 1 Corinthians 10:31, 1 Timothy 4:8, Proverbs 3:9-10
- Dave Scobey's It's a New Day for Financial Freedom
In Season 3 Episode 15, we continue talking about how those who want to FINISH WELL establish sustainable habits. In our previous episode we talked about spiritual habits and in this episode we talk about relational and vocational habits.
In our relationships we must seek to 1) be intentional about connections and conversations, 2) give each other the benefit of the doubt, 3) make every effort to make your wrongs right, and 4) keep short accounts.
In our vocations we must seek to 1) leave work at work and try not to bring work home, 2) be careful of getting all your emotional love needs met through work, and 3) don't let people's praise or criticism define you.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Atomic Habits by James Clear
- Are You Getting the Results You Desire? blogpost
- Love & Respect Experience by Emerson Eggerichs
- Who I Am in Christ by Neal Anderson
- Scripture: Proverbs 11:27, Matthew 5:23-24, 1 Corinthians 13:5, Colossians 3:24-25
In Season 3 Episode 14, we talk about how those who want to FINISH WELL establish sustainable habits. Ask yourself, what is a habit? What would you say are your habits? Habits create the current of your life and establish the direction you're going. Habits can be both positive and negative. Are any of your habits damaging and destructive? If you want to overcome these, you have to replace it with a good habit.
The first area we talk about is the Spiritual area of our lives, which include the following: 1) spending daily time with the Lord, 2) worshiping regularly with the Body of Christ, 3) connecting and growing weekly with others, and 4) serving routinely through ministry and mission.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Scripture: Mark 1:35, Luke 4:16, Psalm 122:1, Psalm 92:12-15, Hebrews 10:24-25, Galatians 5:13
- Thought Tree
In Season 3 Episode 13, we talk about how those who want to FINISH WELL walk in a manner worthy of the Lord. So, how do we do that? What does a life that pleases the Lord look like? We must consider if there is any duplicity in our life by asking if our private life lines up with our public life.
Questions to consider: When would you say you are most susceptible to your reputation and your character not being in alignment? When are you tempted to be "two-faced" or hypocritical?
Mentioned in this episode:
- Scripture: Ephesians 4:1, Colossians 1:10, 2 Peter 3:18, John 15:5, Ephesians 5:10, Colossians 2:6, Romans 2:4, Romans 12:9, Proverbs 22:1, Proverbs 10:9, Mark 4:22, James 5:16
In Season 3 Episode 12, we talk about how those who want to FINISH WELL have a focused life. You need to not only know the purpose of your life, but you also need to know God's purpose for your life. It's important to know with certainty what God has called you to do.
Consider these questions as you listen - Do you know God's specific calling and purpose for your life? Why is it important that we know this? Is there anything or anyone in your life requiring an inordinate amount of time and energy that's not necessary? If so, how might you begin to "grow your no"?
Mentioned in this episode:
- Scripture: 2 Peter 3:9, 1 Timothy 2:3-4, Matthew 18:14, Acts 13:36, Philippians 3:13
- Tyranny of the Urgent by Charles Hummel
- Half Time Bob Buford
In Season 3 Episode 11, we talk about setting up hedges of protection around your marriage. As we have worked through some of these hedges in Season 2 of the podcast, Scott and Dawn aim to coach you through how to develop these protections. Take some time to consider what "policies or procedures" you can develop for yourselves to protect your marriage and family. They explain how it's important to go ahead and talk about these things now, not because you don't trust each other, but because you want to guard the trust that you do have.
We encourage you to download this list of policies to work through as a couple. These are some of the areas that we’ve considered, but there may be others that are pertinent to your life and marriage that would be helpful to create a policy for.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Season 2 Episodes 12 & 13
- Hedges of Protection blogpost
- Scripture: Proverbs 11:25, Proverbs 22:7
In Season 3 Episode 10, we talk about how those who want to FINISH WELL invest in others bygiving away to others what God has given to them. In the previous episode we talked about WHAT to invest in others and in this episode we talk specifically about HOW to do that. We invest in others through our S.H.A.P.E. - Spiritual gifts, Heart, Abilities, Personality, and Experiences.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Spiritual Gifts Inventory
- Scripture References: 1 Peter 4:10, Rom. 12:4-8, 1 Cor. 12:1-11, 27-31, Eph. 4:11-13, 1 Peter 4:9-11, Prov. 27:19, 2 Cor. 1:3-4, Ex. 31
In Season 3 Episode 9, we talk about how those who want to FINISH WELL invest in others bygiving away to others what God has given to them. In this episode we talk specifically about WHAT to give away (i.e., financial capital, intellectual capital, physical capital, etc.) and in the next episode we will talk about HOW to do that.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Proverbs 11:25, 2 Timothy 2:2, James 4:17, 1 Thessalonians 2:8
- Building a Discipling Culture by Mike Breen
- It's a New Day For Financial Freedom (David Scobey)
In Season 3 Episode 8, we conclude our discussion of the habits of grace and talk specifically about submission. What is submission and what does it look like? Our culture views submission negatively and is often seen as "lording over someone to press them down." But what does the Bible say? Paul says in Ephesians 5:21, "Out of reverence for Christ, submit to one another." In this episode, we take a closer look at biblical submission and what it looks like to submit to one another.
Mentioned in this episode: Eph. 5:21, Col. 3:1, 1 Peter 5:6-7, Phil. 2:1-11
In Season 3 Episode 7, we continue talking about how to nurture the habits of grace (or spiritual disciplines) in your personal life. We continue to discuss the habits of engagement, and talk specifically about service and confession.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Galatians 5:13, Matthew 20:28, Matthew 20:26, Psalm 51:4, Ephesians 5:13, Psalm 32:3, Proverbs 28:13, 1 Peter 5:7, James 5:16, Psalm 139:23-24, Psalm 26:2, Ephesians 4:32, 1 John 1:5
In Season 3 Episode 6, Scott and Dawn continue the conversation of nurturing the habits of grace (or spiritual disciplines) in your personal life. In this episode we move on to the habits on engagement, which are prayer, fellowship, worship, study, service, confession and submission.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Scripture: Heb. 3:7-8, Heb. 3:15, Heb. 4:7, Matt. 11:15, Matt. 13:43, Acts 2:42-47, Heb. 13:16, 1 Cor. 10:13, Ps. 115:1, Rom. 12:1-2, 1 Cor. 10:31, Jn. 4:23-24, Acts 17:11, 2 Tim. 2:15, 1 Jn. 4:1, Ps. 119:18
- Navigators Word Hand illustration
In Season 3 Episode 5, Scott and Dawn continue talking about the importance of nurturing the habits of grace (or spiritual disciplines) in your personal life. We began the discussion of these habits, particularly habits of abstinence, in episode 4, and in today's episode we talk specifically about frugality, sacrifice, and chastity.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Galatians 5:22-23
- John 15:13
- Romans 12:10
- Phil. 2:3-4
- 1 Corinthians 7:5
- 2 Timothy 2:22
- Proverbs 13:20
- 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5
*Season 2, Episodes 12 & 13 talk about boundaries (Hedges of Protection to place around your marriage).
In Season 3 Episode 4, Scott and Dawn talk about the importance of nurturing the habits of grace (or spiritual disciplines) in your personal life. These habits can be broken down into two categories - habits of abstinence and habits of engagement. Habits of abstinence are the ones where we push the things of this world away or set something aside in order to pull the things of God into you. The habits of abstinence include fasting, silence, solitude, frugality, sacrifice, and chastity.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Daniel 1:5, 8-16; 10:2-3
- Psalm 139:23-24
- Dietrich Bonhoeffer's Life Together: The Classic Exploration of Faith in Community
In Season 3 Episode 3, Scott and Dawn unpack the second characteristic of those who FINISH WELL: Invite Others Into Your LifeRelationships are very important and our willingness to invite other people into our life is key to finishing well. Success in finishing well depends upon a network of key relationships which fall within these three categories: upstream relationships, walking buddies, and downstream relationships.
Questions to consider: Who do you have in your life, beyond your parents and your spouse, that can speak into your life? Who are your "walking buddies"? Who are you pouring into? Mentioned in this episode:
- John 15:15
- Proverbs 27:17
- 1 Thessalonians 2:8
- Luke 10:38-42
- Proverbs 11:14
- Proverbs 27:6
- Ephesians 4:15
- Proverbs 17:17
- Luke 10:1-9
In the second episode of season 3, Scott and Dawn unpack the first characteristic of those who FINISH WELL: Fix Your Eyes on Jesus.
Christ is the source of our life and is worthy to be the center of our affections. We talk about some means and methods that we have found to be helpful in centering our affections on Jesus. We talk about how, as Christians, we are saved by grace alone, in Christ alone, and only by his grace will we FINISH WELL.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Hebrews 12:1-2
- Colossians 3:1-2
- Acts 17:28
- Romans 11:36
- Ephesians 2:8
- John 14:6
- Romans 6:23
- 2 Corinthians 5:21
- 1 Corinthians 15:10
- Ephesians 2:10
- Philippians 1:6
- Jude 1
- Jude 24
Pause and Ponder: Is there any area of my life that needs a course correction so that I can FINISH WELL? If so, what needs to change?
As we kick off Season 3 of the Forever Marriage Podcast, Scott & Dawn discuss what it means to FINISH WELL.
How we start in life is important. Athletic races are often won and lost at the starting blocks. But, even more important than a good start is a great finish. The older we get, the less impressed we are with the “shooting stars” of today who have a great start. It’s common nowadays for “shooting stars” to become “flashes in the pan” who either finish poorly or don’t finish the race at all. We are truly inspired by those who exhibit steadfast faithfulness over the course of a lifetime - often 7-9 decades in length. They are the real stars. Afterall, real life is more of a marathon than it is a sprint, isn’t it? The ones who have trained and prepared to run a marathon often know what it takes to “finish with endurance the race that is set before (them)” - Hebrews 12:1.
In our next episodes, we'll discuss these 10 characteristics that seem to be common threads of those who FINISH WELL:
F - ix your eyes on Jesus
I - nvite others into your life
N - urture the habits of grace (spiritual disciplines) in your personal life
I - nvest in others
S - et up hedges of protection
H - ave a focused life
W - alk in a manner worthy of the Lord
E - stablish sustainable habits
L - earn for all of life
L - ive with the end in mind
Mentioned in this episode:
- Jean Fleming's Pursue the Intentional Life
- Word to ponder - Prepare
- Psalm 90:12
Season 2: Six Keys to Better Sex in Marriage
Episode 16: Remove Any Barriers to Sexual Satisfaction
In this final episode of Season 2, the Smiths encourage couples to be purposeful in removing any barriers to sexual satisfaction, which include:
- Inability to discuss openly and honestly sexual desires and needs.
- When one partner makes requests that makes another partner uncomfortable.
- Decisions regarding birth control.
Mentioned in this episode:
- 1 Corinthians 13:5
- 5 Keys to a Safe Relationship - blogpost or podcast
- Ephesians 5:21
Couple's Conversation1. How does the language used when discussing sexual issues make you feel?
2. What can we do to strengthen our love for each other?
3. Do we understand one another's preferences for non-sexual touch and affection?
4. How do you think my interest in sex might be different from yours?
Season 2: Six Keys to Better Sex in Marriage
Episode 15: 3 Ways to Fan the Flame of Longing for One Another
In this episode the Smiths finish discussing Key 5 - Pray with and for One Another. In this key, the Smiths talk about these 3 ways to fan the flame of longing for one another:
- Be loving to your spouse.
- Treat your spouse as desirable.
- Remember that sex in the head erodes sex in the bed.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Romans 12:9
- Proverbs 11:27
- Blogpost - You Will Always Find What You are Looking For
- Philippians 4:8
- Keeping Blessing Hill by Joyce Sackett
- Job 31:1
Couple's Conversation1. With regard to our sexual relationship, how can I best pray for you?
2. From this study, what false or distorted beliefs have you uncovered within your thinking?
3. Share what you find most attractive or appealing about your spouse.
Season 2: Six Keys to Better Sex in Marriage
Episode 14: Pray with and for One Another
In this episode the Smiths kick off Key 5 - Pray with and for One Another. In this key, the Smiths talk about how they believe prayer is the master key that has the potential to unlock all the doors of biblical intimacy for you and your spouse. Paul says in Philippians 4:6, " Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." We can talk to God about everything and prayer requests regarding our sex life is no different. These are 3 ways you can pray with and for one another:
- Pray for God to show you false or distorted beliefs you have regarding God and sex.
- Pray for God to give you longings only for one another.
- Pray proactively.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Philippians 4:6-7
- 1 John 5:14-15
- Hebrews 4:16
- "Have a daily point of contact" blog referenced
- 1 Corinthians 6:18
- Ephesians 6:18
- Song of Songs 4:7
Season 2: Six Keys to Better Sex in MarriageEpisode 13: 8 "Hedges of Protection" to Place Around Your Marriage (Pt. 2)
In this episode the Smiths discuss Key 4 - Fiercely Protect Emotional Intimacy with and for One Another. In this key, the Smiths continue to share the "hedges of protection" they have placed around themselves to protect the fidelity of their marriage. The first 4 were covered in episode 12 and the last 4 are covered in this episode.
- Be cautious of social media interactions with others of the opposite sex, especially former "flames."
- Keep no secrets.
- Be mindful of affairs of the heart (emotional affairs).
- Don't lose your mind.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Matthew 15:18-19
- Genesis 3 (Read and look for key words like "hide", "cover", "blame", "deny," etc.)
- Mark 4:22
- The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman
- Ephesians 5:13
- James 5:16
- 1 Peter 5:8
- Proverbs 20:1
- Ephesians 5:15-18
Couple's Conversation:
1. What "hedges" have you and your spouse agreed to place around your marriage?
2. How are those "hedges" working?
3. Are there additional "hedges" you would like your spouse to incorporate into their daily life?
4. Are there areas of your spouse's life where they may have "blind spots" (areas of susceptibility they have that others see but your spouse doesn't)?
Forever Marriage at Lakewood exists to strengthen families by helping couples discover God's design for marriage. Season 2: Six Keys to Better Sex in Marriage
Episode 12: 8 "Hedges of Protection" to Place Around Your Marriage
In this episode the Smiths kick off Key 4 - Fiercely Protect Emotional Intimacy with and for One Another. In this key, the Smiths share the "hedges of protection" they have placed around themselves to protect the fidelity of their marriage. The first 4 are covered in this episode and the last 4 will be covered in episode 13.
- Never ride in a car alone with someone of the opposite sex.
- Never eat alone with someone of the opposite sex.
- Never meet alone with someone of the opposite sex.
- When traveling alone, have an accountability system in place.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Colossians 1:27
- Hedges: Loving Your Marriage Enough to Protect It by Jerry Jenkins
- Philippians 2:15
- Billy Graham's Modesto Manifesto
Forever Marriage at Lakewood exists to strengthen families by helping couples discover God's design for marriage. Season 2: Six Keys to Better Sex in Marriage
Episode 11: 4 Experiences to Live with Your Spouse in an Understanding Way
In this episode the Smiths conclude Key 3 - Regard Each Other's Needs as More Important than Your Own. They talk about how at various seasons of marriage and as you and your spouse age, you may have to deal with issues that can potentially affect your sexual intimacy. The Smiths discuss these 4 experiences to live with your spouse in an understanding way:
- Wives "coach" your husband to increase his knowledge and understanding of your unique biology, gynecology, health, and health history. Husbands, be coachable.
- Sexual trauma, changes in libido, sexual disfunction, Illnesses, medication changes, injuries, and chronic pain can greatly affect your sexual relationship – communicate, seek wise counsel, and pray.
- Pregnancy and different seasons of life can present challenges.
- Often, infertility consumes the sexual relationship – talk and pray with each other. Also, don't bear this burden alone.
Scriptures mentioned in this episode: Proverbs 3:27, Galatians 6:2
Couple's Conversation:
- Why is it sometimes difficult to be affectionate?
- Do you talk about how you can meet each other’s need for affection? If not, why not?
- What do you need in order to be in the mood for sex?
- Do you feel comfortable initiating sex? Why or why not?
- How often would you prefer or expect sex?
- What sexual activities do you enjoy most?
- Are there specific sexual acts that make you uncomfortable?
- How could we each contribute to making our sexual relationship more satisfying?
Forever Marriage at Lakewood exists to strengthen families by helping couples discover God's design for marriage. Season 2: Six Keys to Better Sex in Marriage
Episode 10: Is She a Red Solo Cup or a Crystal Goblet?
In this episode the Smiths continue discussing Key 3 - Regard Each Other's Needs as More Important than Your Own. We compare a red solo cup and a crystal goblet. We describe the two and explain how this is a helpful visual comparison for husbands and how they consider their wives. We also take a look at 1 Peter 3:7 and see what God's word says about how husbands are to think about their wives.
Forever Marriage at Lakewood exists to strengthen families by helping couples discover God's design for marriage. Season 2: Six Keys to Better Sex in Marriage
Episode 9: 3 Ways to Become a Student of Your Spouse
In this episode the Smiths jump into Key 3 - Regard Each Other's Needs as More Important that Your Own. The idea explained in this key is that you and your spouse will experience better sex in marriage as you embrace the selfless nature of biblical sexuality. The Smiths unpack these three specific and practical ways to become a student of your spouse:
- Discover his/her love language.
- Determine when he/she is most receptive to sexual intimacy.
- Discern what destroys sexual intimacy for him/her.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Philippians 2:3-4
- Romans 12:10
- Love Language book
- Love Language quiz
- Proverbs 3:27
- 1 Peter 3:7
Forever Marriage at Lakewood exists to strengthen families by helping couples discover God's design for marriage. Season 2: Six Keys to Better Sex in Marriage
Episode 8: 10 Necessary Practices for Restoration (continued)
In this episode the Smiths continue to discuss the 10 necessary practices for restoration if there has been sexual sin in marriage. In episode 7, the Smiths covered the first three steps and in this episode, they cover steps 4-10, which are as follows:
- Give your spouse complete and unhindered access to any and all of your accounts.
- Be willing to go the "extra mile."
- If travel is required for your job, develop a plan of accountability with your partner that you both agree to.
- The job of the betraying spouse is to rebuild trust.
- The job of the betrayed is to forgive.
- Establish a specific time and place (weekly) that questions can be discussed (beyond the counseling sessions).
- Understand you don't want things to go "back to normal."
Mentioned in this episode:
- Covenant Eyes App
- Sexual Sin blogpost
- Life 360 App
- Setting Your Marriage Free book
- 1 Corinthians 13:4
- Ephesians 4:32
- Are You Getting the Results you Desire? blogpost
- Isaiah 41:10
- Hebrews 13:5
- Psalm 46:1
- Proverbs 3:5-6
- Psalm 32:3
After listening to Episodes 5-8 (Key 2), discuss these questions with your spouse as followup:
1. In our marriage, what do you consider "need" to know information and "want" to know information?
2. What are your thoughts about masturbation?
3. Do you believe pornography is wrong or "no big deal"?
4. How does sexually explicit material impact our relationship?
Forever Marriage at Lakewood exists to strengthen families by helping couples discover God's design for marriage. Season 2: Six Keys to Better Sex in Marriage
Episode 7: Adultery in Marriage & 10 Necessary Practices for Restoration
In this episode the Smiths continue to discuss Key 2 and talk about what to do if there has been adultery in marriage. They then begin discussing the first 3 of the 10 necessary practices for restoration:
- Seek the guidance of a trusted and biblically wise marriage mentor.
- Cut off any and all contact with the other person.
- Speak the truth and nothing but the truth.
Mentioned in this episode:
- 1 Corinthians 6:18-20
- Numbers 32:23
- Matthew 5:27-30
- Proverbs 28:13
- Blogpost on the 10 Necessary Practices for Restoration
Stay tuned for S2E8 where Scott and Dawn will conclude the discussion on 4-10 of the practices for restoration.
Forever Marriage at Lakewood exists to strengthen families by helping couples discover God's design for marriage. Season 2: Six Keys to Better Sex in Marriage
Episode 6: 3 Steps to Consider When Dealing with Sexual Sin
In this episode the Smiths continue to discuss Key 2 and talk specifically about these 3 steps to consider when dealing with sexual sin:
- Agree on what is "need to know" information versus "want to know" information.
- Confess sexual sins you may have committed (i.e., pornography, masturbation, abortion, or other traumatic experiences).
- Acknowledge sexual sins that may have been committed against you.
Mentioned in this episode:
1 Corinthians 6:18-20
Biblical Mediation for Temptation
Mark 4:22
Matthew 18
In our next episode we will tackle the big topic of adultery in marriage and also talk about 10 necessary practices for restoration.
If you wish to speak with the Smiths or someone on the Forever Marriage Team please email us at elavender@lakewoolife.org and we will get you connected.
Forever Marriage at Lakewood exists to strengthen families by helping couples discover God's design for marriage. Season 2: Six Keys to Better Sex in Marriage
Episode 5: Key 2 - Deal with Sexual Sin - Past or Present
In this episode the Smiths discuss how sexual immorality of any sort is never to be tolerated - in or outside of marriage. A crucial aspect to experiencing a mutually fulfilling sex life inside of marriage is to ensure there is not past or present sin yet to be dealt with. The Smiths share from their own experience the powerful impact of confessed sin on their lives and marriage. To experience better sex in marriage, they encourage that you must be prepared to confess sexual sins to one another.
Mentioned in this episode:
1 Corinthians 6:18-20
Ephesians 5:13
James 5:16
Sex and the Soul of a Woman by Paula Rinehart
Forever Marriage at Lakewood exists to strengthen families by helping couples discover God's design for marriage.In Episode 4 of Season 2 of the Forever Marriage Podcast, Scott & Dawn conclude discussing the first Key of Six Keys to Better Sex in Marriage.
Key 1: Align your thinking about sex with God’s truth.
Within this key, Scott and Dawn explain these 3 ways to know if your sexual relationship is unhealthy:1. You have a negative mindset about sex.
2. It has to be perverse to work.
3. It is about addiction instead of affection. After listening to this episode, take some time to discuss these questions with your spouse. Couple's Conversation1. What does "affection" mean to you?
2. How much affection was there in your family growing up (verbal and nonverbal)?
3. What was the attitude toward sex in your family? Was it talked about?
4. Where did you learn about sex?
5. What do you see as the relationships between communication, intimacy and affection?
6. Do you believe sex is intended for marriage, or anyone in a loving relationship?
7. What do you believe is the basic difference in the way men and women approach sex?
In Episode 3 of Season 2 of the Forever Marriage Podcast, Scott & Dawn continue discussing the first Key of Six Keys to Better Sex in Marriage, which is to align your thinking about sex with God's truth.
On today's episode, Scott and Dawn explain 5 Keys to a Safe Relationship. Earlier this week, we published on the FM Blog an article explaining these 5 Keys. On the podcast today they explain in greater detail how you and your spouse can have open and honest conversations about sex.
Mentioned on the podcast:
- You Will Always Find What You are Looking For
- 1 Peter 3:17
- Romans 15:7
- MRS Goals - Measurable, Realistic, and Specific
- Proverbs 3:27
We encourage you to download a copy of the PDF of Six Keys to Better Sex in Marriage as you listen to this season of the FM Podcast.
Stay tuned for Season 2, Episode 4! In this episode we will conclude the first Key with a discussion on how to know if your sexual relationship is unhealthy.
Forever Marriage at Lakewood exists to strengthen families by helping couples discover God's design for marriage. In Episode 2 of Season 2 of the Forever Marriage Podcast, Scott & Dawn continue discussing the first Key of Six Keys to Better Sex in Marriage.
Key 1: Align your thinking about sex with God’s truth.
Within this key, Scott and Dawn explain the biblical purpose of sex that we see throughout Scripture.
- Procreation (Genesis 1:28)
- Partnership (Genesis 2:24-25)
- Pleasure (Proverbs 5:18-19, Song of Solomon 4:16)
- Praise (Romans 12:1-2)
- Picture (Ephesians 5:31-32)
On the next episode of the FM Podcast, we will talk about 5 Keys to a Safe Relationship, which will be helpful as you and your spouse have conversations about physical intimacy.
Forever Marriage at Lakewood exists to strengthen families by helping couples discover God's design for marriage.**Season 2 - Six Keys to Better Sex in Marriage
"**God designed sex. In the first book of the Bible, in the first chapter, God blessed the first man and the first woman and encouraged them to “be fruitful and multiply” (Genesis 1:28). As originally designed, sexual intimacy, in marriage between one man and one woman for all of life, was to create a bond void of shame (Genesis 2:24,25). Unfortunately, the fall of mankind (Genesis 3) disrupted God’s original design for human sexuality. Ever since, sexuality in marriage for many couples is wrought with shame, fear, lying, hiding and blame. In over 20 years of marriage ministry, we have found the keys to better sex in marriage have little to do with position or technique. Instead, the keys lie more in the thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors of both spouses." -Scott & Dawn Smith, Six Keys to Better Sex in Marriage
In Episode 1 of Season 2 of the Forever Marriage Podcast, Scott & Dawn begin with the first Key of Six Keys to Better Sex in Marriage.
Key 1: Align your thinking about sex with God’s truth.
Within this key, Dawn explains the principle of the boundary that we see in the creation account in Genesis 1.
"Everything in creation has a place and there is a boundary around that place that is respected. The problems begin when what is assigned to that place crosses over its boundary."
This principle applies to sex as well. God created sex to be between a man and a woman within the context of marriage. When we overstep this good boundary God created, problems arise.
Stay tuned for Episode 2 where Scott & Dawn will continue unpacking the first Key and address this question: What is the biblical purpose of sex?
We encourage you to download a copy of Six Keys to Better Sex in Marriage as you listen to this season of the FM Podcast.
On Episode 27 of the Forever Marriage Podcast, Scott and Dawn Smith have a conversation with Benji and Emily Lavender about what it looks like to have a "marriage on mission." At Lakewood, Benji serves as the Associate Missions Pastor and Emily serves as the Discipleship Ministry Assistant. On this episode, they share a bit of their story - how they met and were married, how the Lord led them to go overseas, and how community and the local church were instrumental in discerning their call.
They answer some helpful questions like:
- What is the gospel?
- What is missions?
- If marriage is intended to be a visual picture of the gospel, how is that worked out practically?
- What does it look like to have a marriage on mission?
In Episode 26 of the Forever Marriage Podcast, Scott and Dawn Smith continue in their three part series on Covenant Marriage. In this episode, they talk about responsibilities that husbands and wives pick up in marriage - to love unconditionally, to honor respectfully, and submit mutually. Tune in to hear Scott and Dawn explain each of these responsibilities and what that practically looks like in marriage.
In Episode 25 of the Forever Marriage Podcast, Scott and Dawn Smith continue in their three part series on Covenant Marriage. In this episode, they talk about rights that husbands and wives give up in marriage - the right to priority, the right to ownership, and the right to privacy. Tune in to hear Scott and Dawn explain each of these rights and what that practically looks like in marriage.
Check back soon for the final episode, Episode 26, in this three part series on Covenant Marriage to hear about responsibilities that husbands and wives pick up in marriage.
In Episode 24 of the Forever Marriage Podcast, Scott and Dawn Smith begin a three part series on Covenant Marriage. In this episode, they talk about how in life there are three types of relationships: convenient relationships, contractual relationships, and covenant relationships. They discuss the reality that marriage is a covenant relationship where the husband and wife promise to fulfill their word regardless of the other person. Covenant marriages are made to last regardless of the circumstances, which stands in great contrast to convenient relationships and contractual relationships.
Tune in to Episodes 25 & 26 to hear the rest of this three part series on Covenant Marriage.
In Episode 23 of the Forever Marriage Podcast, Scott & Dawn Smith continue the conversation on mutual submission in marriage. They get practical in this episode by providing our listeners with 9 realities about submission in marriage.
In Episode 22 of the Forever Marriage Podcast, Scott & Dawn Smith take a look at Paul's instruction for marriage in Ephesians 5, specially this idea of mutual submission. Ephesians 5:21 says, "Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ." The Smiths explain what submission is and what it is not. They discuss some reasons why it is hard for us to submit to one another but also how, in Christ, we are able. And as we consider Christ's perfect example of submission, we are encouraged and empowered to follow his example.
In Episode 21 of the FM Podcast, Scott & Dawn pick back up with their discussion on how to R.E.S.O.L.V.E. differences according to God's wisdom in Ephesians 4. In the last episode, we learned the first three letters of this helpful acrostic:
R - Remove falsehoods (Ephesians 4:25)
E - Express anger appropriately (Ephesians 4:26-27)
S - Steal no more (Ephesians 4:28)
O ...
L ...
V ...
E ...
Find out the rest of the acrostic in this episode!
At Lakewood we are in the midst of our church wide study called "The Wisdom of Community" where we are reading through the book of Ephesians together as one body.
In Episode 20, Scott and Dawn Smith discuss Ephesians 4. In chapters 1-3 of Ephesians, Paul unpacks our identity in Christ and the church's union with Him. In chapter 4, Paul transitions to explain how we are to practically live out of that identity as the church.
In this episode of the FM Podcast, Scott and Dawn help our listeners to see what it looks like to practically live out of our identity in Christ in the context of marriage. They discuss how to "R.E.S.O.L.V.E." differences in marriage according to Paul's wisdom in Ephesians 4:25-32.
At Lakewood we are doing a church wide study called "The Wisdom of Community" where we are reading through the book of Ephesians together as one body. For the next 6 weeks, in all of our Sunday morning groups, community groups, the sermons on Sunday mornings... the book of Ephesians is where we will focus our attention.
So for the next few episodes on the FM Podcast, we all also will take a closer look at this magnificent epistle written by the Apostle Paul. In Episode 19, Scott and Dawn Smith discuss Ephesians 1. They draw our attention to key prepositional phrases found in Paul's letter and unpack the importance of relating to your spouse in the reality of these phrases like "in Christ," "through Christ," and "before him," etc.
Consider how living in light of these key prepositional phrases might affect your marriage?
Forever Marriage was able to host an Online Marriage Conference in March and couples were encouraged to watch 4 pre-recorded sessions on our website over the course of the weekend. We are excited now to provide the audio recordings of these sessions through our podcast! We hope you enjoy!
In session 4 of FMC Online, Scott & Dawn Smith speak to couples about physical intimacy in marriage. To download session notes, visit https://www.forevermarriage.org/conference/
Forever Marriage was able to host an Online Marriage Conference in March and couples were encouraged to watch 4 pre-recorded sessions on our website over the course of the weekend. We are excited now to provide the audio recordings of these sessions through our podcast! We hope you enjoy!
In session 3 of FMC Online, Levi & Christa Skipper talk to couples about relational intimacy in marriage. To download session notes, visit https://www.forevermarriage.org/conference/
Forever Marriage was able to host an Online Marriage Conference in March and couples were encouraged to watch 4 pre-recorded sessions on our website over the course of the weekend. We are excited now to provide the audio recordings of these sessions through our podcast! We hope you enjoy!
In session 2 of FMC Online, Levi & Christa Skipper explain to couples the importance of spiritual intimacy in marriage. To download session notes, visit https://www.forevermarriage.org/conference/
Forever Marriage was able to host an Online Marriage Conference in March and couples were encouraged to watch 4 pre-recorded sessions on our website over the course of the weekend. We are excited now to provide the audio recordings of these sessions through our podcast! We hope you enjoy!
In session 1 of FMC Online, Scott & Dawn Smith give an overview of intimacy in marriage. To download session notes, visit https://www.forevermarriage.org/conference/
In this episode, Scott & Dawn Smith conclude their "Train Your Mouth for Marriage" series they did back in the fall at Lakewood. The Smiths call our attention to the sowing and reaping principle found in Galatians 6:7-8. They remind us that our words are seeds and we will eat the fruit of what is sown. The Smiths finish the episode by challenging us with 7 good seeds we can sow when we speak - praise, thanksgiving, affection, encouragement, prayer, truth, and the Word.
Scott & Dawn Smith continue sharing from a series they did back in the fall at Lakewood called, "Train Your Mouth for Marriage." In this episode, the Smiths challenge listeners to be on guard against speaking in these four foolish ways - with loose lips, lying lips, seductive speech, and a tempered tongue. As you listen, ask yourself which one of these 4 areas needs the most attention from you. Do you struggle with gossip? Are your words deceptive and untrue? Is your speech seductive and with selfish motives? And finally, do your words reflect that you are quick tempered? Consider how you can be more careful in your speech so that you will be less likely to fall prey to these four foolish ways to speak.
Scott & Dawn Smith continue sharing from a series they did back in the fall at Lakewood called, "Train Your Mouth for Marriage." In this episode, the Smiths remind us of this saying: "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me." And they explain that this saying is, in fact, not true at all. Words can definitely hurt us. They remind us of Proverbs 12:18, which says that "reckless words pierce like a sword." Words can have long lasting effects - for good or for bad. We need to speak carefully, intentionally, and with wisdom.
Consider the following questions as you listen:
- Can you think of a time when someone’s reckless words pierced you like a sword? What were the affects of that piercing?
- When it comes to careless, ill-timed, or unfiltered words; who are you most prone to say these to? Why is that so?
If you’ve been keeping up with the podcast, you know that we’ve been sharing with you some recorded marriage conference sessions from Scott and Dawn Smith. And today we want to share with you their final session:
On Episode #11 of the FM Podcast, we hear the Smiths speak about how, in marriage, we are better together because we can remind each other of the benefits of God.The Smiths open up to Psalm 103 and encourage couples to consider all that God has done for us. They explain that, as children of God, we are prone to forget the truth of who he is and who we are in him. There are days when you are encouraged and your spouse is struggling; it is then we lovingly point our spouse to Jesus. And the flip side of that is true too. We have to remind each other that, in Jesus, our lives are redeemed.
On Episode #10 of the FM Podcast, we hear some more from a recent marriage conference session where Scott and Dawn Smith spoke about how, in marriage, we help each other fulfill God’s call on our lives.
Scott and Dawn explain that we all have passions, skill, and abilities that we bring into our marriage relationship and that we can help our spouse discern and walk in God's leading. They prompt us to consider these questions:
- Wives, how can you speak words of life and affirmation into your husband's life?
- Husbands, how can you stay in tune with the heart of your wife to know what her desires and dreams are?
Scott & Dawn Smith are leading a series on Wednesday nights for couples at Lakewood called, "Train Your Mouth for Marriage." In this 5 part series, the Smiths are unpacking the importance of our words and the impact they can have on our spouse - either for good or for bad.
On this episode of the FM Podcast, the Smiths share with us Part 2 entitled "What's Down in the Well Comes Up in the Bucket." The Smiths look at Luke 6:45 where Jesus says, "The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks." Our words reveal what is in our heart. The Smiths explain that If we really want to control our tongues - knowing what to say, when to say it, and when to say nothing at all - we need to drill down deeper to what is really in our heart and mind in order to move toward helpful and effective communication.
Scott & Dawn Smith are leading a series on Wednesday nights for couples at Lakewood called, "Train Your Mouth for Marriage." In this 5 part series, the Smiths are unpacking the importance of our words and the impact they can have on our spouse - either for good or for bad.
On this episode of the FM Podcast, the Smiths share with us Part 1 entitled, "Small, but Mighty." The Smiths walk us through James 3:1-12, where James speaks of the power of the tongue and he gives three examples of small natural elements that cause an effect 100 times its own size: bits, rudders and sparks. A bit in the mouth of a horse can restrain the large beast. A small wooden rudder can direct a massive ship through the water. A small spark can ignite a huge forest fire. The Smiths explain that we can understand the power of the tongue by taking a closer look at these small but mighty examples. The Smiths also unpack ways we can seek to control our words.
From todays episode:
- T.H.I.N.K. Before You Speak blog post
On Episode #7 of the FM Podcast, we hear some more from a recent marriage conference session where Scott and Dawn Smith spoke about the importance of encouraging other couples on their marital journey.
The Smiths have been investing in other marriages for over 20 years now in ministry. This is what they do for a living and are passionate about it! But they encourage us that investing in other marriages doesn't have to be reserved for pastors and church leaders alone. The Smiths explain that the work of marriage ministry can and should be done by Christ followers like you and me. They explain the necessity to be diligent in the church to invest in marriages.
They discuss other things like:
- The principal in God's word of sowing and reaping (see 2 Corinthians 9:6-15 & Galatians 6:6-10).
- Offering comfort to another couple with the comfort you yourselves have received from God (see 2 Corinthians 1:3-7).
- We grow spiritually by serving and investing in other marriages is one way to do that.
We encourage you to consider these questions after listening:
- How can you and your spouse sow seeds of life into the lives of another couple??
- Has God done a work in your marriage that you can now share with someone else for their encouragement and help?
A few weekends ago, Scott and Dawn Smith were the keynote speakers at a marriage conference and the topic of the weekend was how, in marriage, husbands and wives are better together. We have several of those sessions recorded and are excited to share those with you!
On today's episode, we’ve honed in on a portion of one of their conference sessions where they talk about how we are to TRUST in the power and strength of God and not our own in marriage. They explain how our "human love" has limitations and, as believers in Christ, we have to trust in the Lord for his power in our marriage. We just don't have what it takes in and of ourselves, apart from Jesus, to have the marriage that God intends for us to have. Take a few minutes to listen now and be encouraged!
On this episode of the Forever Marriage Podcast, we want to share with you some of a conversation that our team had a few weeks ago about parenting - more specifically, our intentional prayers for our children and our spiritual attentiveness to our children as we shepherd their hearts. On this episode, Scott and Dawn Smith share from their parenting experiences and discuss some of the following:
How to:
- Have ongoing conversations with your kids
- Pray for your children (a.k.a., "prayer-enting")
- Entrust your children to the Lord
- Live from a place of freedom in your parenting
- Be spiritually attentive to your children
If you are a parent, we hope you will take a few minutes to listen to this episode and be encouraged in your parenting journey!
On today's episode of the Forever Marriage Podcast, Scott and Dawn Smith answer the following question from a listener:
"How do we rebuild trust after mutual infidelity? What are practical steps we can take to earn trust back and extend trust when it feels foolish and scary to do so?"
On today's episode of the Forever Marriage Podcast, Scott and Dawn Smith answer the following question from a listener, which revolves around conflict in marriage due to finances:
“We have been married for 28 years. My spouse continues to run up credit card accounts in the tens of thousands of dollars. She refuses to give up her cards. She refuses professional help. I have personally paid off her debt many times over the years, only to go through the same scenario over and over again. Why should I remain in this marriage at my financial demise when she refuses to get help?”
In our first podcast, Scott & Dawn Smith respond to a husband’s concern regarding marital conflict and physical touch. This is the husband’s concern:
“Conflict has crept into our marriage because while we both enjoy our intimate moments, I prefer to have a consistent amount of touch - a random hug, holding hands, arm around each other, and nothing more than a connection. She was raised in a single parent family and didn’t witness any loving touch between parents. To me, it seems natural and necessary. Without it, there must be something wrong. Please help!”Check out what Scott & Dawn have to say regarding conflict and physical touch in marriage.