Honest Thoughts: Recent Episodes
Aaron Patrick
A more personal space to share my open honest thoughts - raw and unedited - with anyone willing to listen.
A lot has happened over the course of time I had been away. Here's my musings on what it means to be a man, be strong, and to grow and change.
It's been over a month since the last episode! Also, it's the last month of 2020. A few things that have been on my mind recently: the possibilities of how things can turn out to be and can change according to how God wills; the finiteness of life, material things, and money - and how we shouldn't worry or cling onto things but appreciate things as is; and on observing aging family members and the contrast between this life and eternity.
Just wanna move forward to a better me. How would one do that? Hold out hope, not letting your past bog you down, and saying a better yes to better things.
(Pardon me for the lack in structure. Just trying to get my thoughts off the top of my head.) Had a thought that came to me this morning as I gave in to temptation - bind yourself to grace that gives you freedom from your sin. True freedom can be found in discipline that shapes us and empowers us to do as we ought, all in the grace given to us from above. Whereas freedom that indulges in our own passions and desires proves chaotic and meaningless.
A thought came to me a day ago, since it's 2020 it feels like it could either be the end of the world or the end of your life - "What would you do if today was your last day?" Following up on that was "what would your life make of you?" Reflecting upon the frailty of human life should cause us to be humble and live wisely, and not commiting evil and shame. Because what you make of your life, your life will make of you.
I got the job! And reflecting on the past few weeks and looking back at who I was and what I've been through, I can say that one of the things that carried me through was hope. Because of this, I find myself to be in a better place knowing that my hopes were realised.
Dad wants me, a Mass Comm graduate, to be a captain of a cargo ship!? Crazy ah? Anyway, here's my rant on how it's not always about the money and getting the best job with the best pay even though it may be good in terms of finances, but not as good for the soul.
Woke up early to find myself spontaneously taking a morning stroll around my neighbourhood in search of inspiration, meaning, and refreshment.
What's the deal with feelings anyway? How do we handle them? For me, there is a time and place to express these feelings and process them, as well as the effects they would leave on our circumstances.
It's already the mid-week, and I gotta get this job interview assignment done so I can secure the job that I applied for. Waking up this morning, I questioned myself: do I really want this job? What are my intentions - will I like what I'm doing, or am I only in it for the money? Or is it something more? Are my passions only limited to my comfort zone? Maybe the purpose of a job is for us to step out of that comfort zone and do the challenging and uncomfortable things that causes us to grow our capacity.
Wanted to give my thoughts as to the importance of being part of a community that is a part of you. Really thankful for the communities I've been a part of, especially CF.
My flow of thoughts on this one is a little messy, but bear with me. Reflecting on my laid-back nature as a person and the seasons I've been through in life, I discover that my sense of consistency and discipline only fits the commitments I have in life such as if it's school, or college, or even later at work. Whereas on the other hand, obtaining more freedom in terms of timing leads to less consistency and discipline. In conclusion, I only adapt when the circumstances call for it. Is it bad? Is it good? That's just me as for who I am for now. But to be consistent with self-discipline and self-management is something admirable.
Recounting the past two days hanging out with close friends and a counselling session with Pastor Melissa, it shifted my perspective a little bit from that of viewing myself in the least importance to that of knowing that as a living breathing human being I'm important and that I am loved.
What identifies a person is not merely one thing or another, but the unique combined experiences, nature, and purpose of a person. So, who are you, really?
It's almost 4am on September 1st, 2020, and I can't sleep. And when I can't sleep, I wanna create something. Hi, I'm Aaron Patrick and welcome to my Honest Thoughts where I'll be speaking my mind - discovering myself as a person, and narrating what I feel about life and the world around me.