The Parenting Junkie Show: Recent Episodes
Avital Schreiber Levy
Hi, I’m Avital. (pronounced Ah-Vee-Tal) I’m a mindful parenting coach, childhood designer, and mother. My work is dedicated to empowering intentional, imperfect parents (like you and me!) who face chaos, clutter, and conflict, through online tools to reclaim peace, presence and play for your family.
In a world where the mere mention of judgment can spark controversy and shame, it's easy to lose sight of its essential role in our lives. There's a crucial difference between being judgmental and exercising sound judgment, yet the fear of judgment has led many to forsake their ability to discern, blurring the lines between criticism and discernment. Join us as we navigate this delicate balance, uncovering why it's vital not to shy away from judgment but instead to embrace it as a cornerstone of wisdom. And perhaps most importantly, why giving the gift of good judgment to our children is an invaluable tool for them in navigating life's complexities with clarity and compassion. __________________
Build the Family of Your Dreams and Become the Leader of Your Family with The Studio! (hifam.com/studio)
We've all experienced it—the gut-wrenching guilt, the overwhelming shame, the moments where we've passed judgment on others. Not the most pleasant feeling... Maybe that's why in today's world, there's a prevailing notion that these emotions should be erased from our vocabulary and emotional palette. But is this truly the best approach to raising our children and fostering healthy relationships?
Join us on an eye-opening journey to challenge these societal norms that try to stop us from feeling these feelings and delve into the complexities of judgment, guilt, and shame. Learn why these emotions are trully important and why we should allow and not shield our kids from these emotions.
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Build the Family of Your Dreams and Become the Leader of Your Family with The Studio!
Ever found yourself meticulously following every parenting guideline to a t, only to feel like something crucial is missing? In this episode, we confront the uncomfortable truth about scripted responses and emotionless reactions and how they may be stifling genuine connections with our children. If you feel that the rules of gentle parenting are just not getting you anywhere - this might be an eye-opening truth as to what might be missing. Even more importantly how, unknowingly, you could have fallen into the traps of Robotic Parenting. Tune in and learn what Robotic Parenting is, how to avoid it, and rediscover the magic of Authentic Parenting.
Build the Family of Your Dreams and Become the Leader of Your Family with The Studio!
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The book mentioned in this episode:
"Bad Therapy: Why Kids Aren't Growing up" by Abigail Shrier
Ever wondered why today's kids seem less ready for adulting? This episode spills the beans on the real struggles – less independence, job hesitations, a bouquet of disorders, and major "not ready" vibes.
Discover what's really going on with our young generation as we dissect the impact of excessive screen time, casual relationships, and the effects of super laid-back parenting. Brace yourself: it's a recipe for stress, anxiety, and more.
But hey, no need to panic! We've got a solid game plan to prep your kids for success in the adulting game. Find out how setting boundaries, sharing values, and building a strong family culture can make your kids ready for anything life throws at them. Join us for a straightforward discussion on the challenges our kids face today and grab practical tips to raise resilient, kick-butt individuals. Tune in and empower your parenting game!
Ready to raise resillient kids that know who they are and where they belong? Create an unbreakable family with The Studio!
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“I love this show!” 👉 If that sounds like you please rate and review the show! This helps us support more people - just like you - to create a family life they love. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
"Have you tried couples therapy?" - that's the one and really ONLY solution that married couples are handed when they are on the brink of going their separate ways. And then... Many come to find that it's actualy not working, or working only for as long as you're going. What about the ones who can't even afford therapy? OR that partner who is frankly refusing to go. What choices are you left with then? Stay in missery or leave and break the family? There has to be a better way, and there is! In this episode, let's dive deep into the terittory of why therapy might be doing your relationship more harm than good. And yes, side note - therapy does good, therapy can be necessary, therapy has its place. Yet, it also has its downfalls and risks you might not even be aware of. Being aware of the problem is the first step in fixing it. So listen in and discover what you actually can do instead to save and also strengthen your marriage. _______ Build the relationship you want with the partner you've got! Take the first step at Married-U! (https://married-u.com)
What happens when peaceful parenting unintentionally takes a toll on your relationship? In this episode, we're unraveling the paradox of practicing zen parenting while forgetting to extend the same grace to our partners. It's not about the tools of peaceful parenting causing the turmoil; it's about the pitfalls of neglecting peaceful partnering too. What are those double standards that may be unknowingly sabotaging your efforts? Discover why your kid might be echoing negative behaviors, and how the example we set in our partnerships becomes the blueprint for their future interactions. Hit play and explore the delicate balance between peaceful parenting and maintaining a loving connection with your partner. _______ Build the relationship you want with the partner you've got! Take the first step at Married-U! (https://married-u.com)
Feminism has contributed significantly to the world, bringing forth numerous benefits. Over the years, it has evolved into a complex and multifaceted movement. Alongside its positive impacts, however, some drawbacks have subtly infiltrated our subconscious. These factors now influence not only how women perceive men and themselves but also impact our relationships. It is crucial to acknowledge these aspects so we can build stronger families and marriages. If you're seeking a fulfilling connection and are curious about the silent forces shaping your perceptions of your partner - join us in this episode. Let's uncover the subtle influences intricately woven within the fabric of feminism affecting your relationship dynamics. Be sure that you haven't unknowingly succumbed to the shadow sides of feminism and instead foster a strong, loving relationship. _______ Create the marriage you WANT with the partner you've got! Married-U will help you make your dream a reality! (married-u.com)
Sleep experts, parenting gurus, and influencers will come out with dramatic, dogmatic, and sometimes even fanatic statements, like "Never ____" or "The choice to ______ is akin to abuse".
But these types of statements encourage a delusion in us parents: that there is ONE right, true and perfect way to parent. That there are whole and complete solutions to our queries and all we have to do is to keep swiping left until we find them.
In this episode, I break down why Thomas Sowell was so, so right when he said: "There are no solutions, only tradeoffs." and I encourage you to take a more nuances, contextual, and individualized perspective when you're digesting your daily dose of parenting advice.
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Want more encouragement and practical guidance in creating a family life that puts family first? Join us in the Hi Fam Community (HiFam.com/Studio)
Get my new book, "Reclaim Play", available on Amazon now! Go to ReclaimPlay.com/book for your free book bonus.
One of the most common questions I get asked by parents around the world is: "How can I give my child something I, myself, don't have?"
We all want to give the best to our children - to "level up" from generation to generation. But then we're faced with the reality that it's very hard to give something that we feel we lack!
So, whether it's about body image, communication skills, health, or confidence - this episode will give you the framework to develop essential life skills in your child and impart the priceless asset of a strong mindset.
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Want to develop true resilience? Become unvictimized, unshakable, and unoffendable through Avital's signature mindset course, Alchemize (hifam.com/alchemize).
We here at Hi Fam want to help you create a family life you love! If you want more on this, join the Hi Fam Newsletter (hifam.com/newsletter).
It might be hard to imagine, but the emphasis on "safety" as one of the main goals for parents, was not always the prevailing value that humans sought after. Today, there's an acute obsession with physical and emotional safety. Caution signs and buzzwords like "safe space" and "trigger warnings" permeate societal circles. But "safetyism" actually leads us all to be less safe. In this episode, I share 3 surprising ways in which a high emphasis on safety actually deteriorates resiliency and 3 strategies you can start practicing now to raise children who are strong - physically, emotionally, and mentally. ~ Learn more about "safetyism" in the context of fostering independence in young children (starting at the earliest ages!) through the surprising powers of play in Avital's new book, Reclaim Play (reclaimplay.com/book). We here at Hi Fam want to help you create a family life you love! If you'd like to go deeper into that, join the Hi Fam newsletter (hifam.com/newsletter).
Sometimes our biggest challenges come by surprise. There are times in our lives when we can plan, research, and make informed decisions. And then there are times when... we can't. When you're facing the fears and uncertainty of the future, it's very challenging to live the long game. And yet, as a parent, we're called to be leaders. Whether you're in "decision limbo" or your life is "on hold" - this podcast will help you find your footing again, despite... not knowing. My mission is to help you create a family life you love. If you'd like more on that, join my newsletter (HiFam.com/newsletter).
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Want more encouragement and practical guidance in creating a family life that puts family first? Join us in the Hi Fam Community (HiFam.com/Studio)
Get my new book, "Reclaim Play", available on Amazon now! Go to ReclaimPlay.com/book for your free book bonus.
Do you ever think, "What is this all for? Does what I do for my family really make a difference?" I've often said, that your family is the most meaningful project of your life. It's been my mission to equip parents of all backgrounds to build a strong family culture that creates a sense of togetherness, belonging, and meaning.
Today, I'm sharing why I am personally doubling down on my resolve to build a strong family, even in the midst of the most petrifying and grievous circumstances.
In every situation, even the most awful, there are lessons to be learned. This episode is my way of creating a segway into answering questions, not about current affairs, per se, but about how you can show up to your family, lead bravely, and create peace in your own home. Maybe you're wondering...
- How do I live the long game even when the future is unknown?
- What boundaries are needed to protect my kids from adult conversations?
- How do I coach my child through a traumatic experience?
- How do I show up each day like my family truly is the most meaningful project of my life - even when I'm stressed, overwhelmed, burned out, or anxious?
I'll be answering these questions and more in upcoming episodes here at Hi Fam.
My mission continues to be to help you create a family life you love. If you'd like more on that, join my newsletter (hifam.com/newsletter). _______
I truly mean it when I say you should NOT continue to follow what's going on if it doesn't directly impact you and instead turn your attention toward your family. But for those who are impacted or who desire to understand better what's going on from my perspective, you can follow me on Instagram (@HiFamLife).
I will also continue showing up to my amazing Hi Fam Community inside The Studio Membership on all things parenting.
If you sometimes waver in your undying commitment and love in your marriage, the resounding advice from the self-help experts of the decade is: "Well, maybe you're just not a match." Has this seed of doubt been planted in your mind?
In this podcast, I share a clip of Mel Robbins giving advice that's not at all uncommon today. As someone who has been categorically labeled as "incompatible" by well-meaning friends, family, and even personality tests that actually point out all the ways that my husband and I are NOT compatible ...allow me to respectfully disagree with Mel and bust, what I call, The Myth of Compatibility! If you're a parent who needs a pick-me-up shot of recommitment juice in your marriage and family, it's right here on Hi Fam.
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Want more encouragement and practical guidance in creating a family life that puts family first? Join us in the Hi Fam Community (HiFam.com/Studio)
Get my new book, "Reclaim Play", available on Amazon now! Go to ReclaimPlay.com/book for your free book bonus.
"You have 5 little kids and you published a book? HOW???" This has been the refrain I've been asked over the past couple of weeks since my book, Reclaim Play, hit Amazon. It certainly wasn't an easy process for me and maybe that's why it took me four whole years!
I love to learn from every area of my life and writing a book is no exception. There were many lessons that I gleaned from this process and today I'm sharing them with you - whether it's a book you want to write, a marathon you want to run, a business you want to start or even just a greater sense of productivity and capacity that you want to foster: this episode is for you!
Get your book order bonus here at ReclaimPlay.com/Book >>
Phew! They say writing a book is not for the faint of heart and I now fully understand why 87% of people who want to write a book - don’t ever write one. But with gratitude to my children who played independently for enough hours for me to actually both write and illustrate this book (yep, those doodles are mine), I have now escaped that statistic and my book baby has been born!!! 🎉
Reclaim Play delivers an inspiring manifesto on why play is critical for children and a comprehensive how-to for parents to bring back the magic of childhood.
In this podcast episode, hear me narrate chapter 3 of the book... the part that explains how play has been S.T.O.L.E.N; where it’s gone, what that acronym stands for, and most importantly: how we’re going to get it back.
Listen now and if you’re one of those loyal listeners who catches these as they drop - THANK YOU! You are still in time to grab the pre-order bonuses at ReclaimPlay.com/book
So you're feeling overwhelmed, snapping at the kids, or you're just not enjoying parenting... how do you reset? Here are the 6 mindsets that keep me going when my cortisol levels are spiked so I can still show up with "hi vibes" for my family. When you upgrade your self-talk, you develop the abilty to avoid a lot of optional stress and suffering.
This episode is practical and encouraging for parents of young children who are "in the trenches". Which mindset will you adopt today?
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Did you enjoy this episode? Please consider leaving this podcast a review! ★★★★★
Want more? Check out my YouTube Channel: www.youtube.com/@HiFamLife
What should parents do when their child is scared, afraid, and fearful? How we respond can make the difference between encouraging mental, emotional fragility and strength.
Here's a 5-step, countercultural approach to childhood fears that will help you help your child become resilient, gritty, and courageous.
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Did you enjoy this episode? Please consider leaving this podcast a review! ★★★★★
Want more? Check out my YouTube Channel: www.youtube.com/@HiFamLife
Have you noticed that the growing trend of "family last" culture? This episode holds a heartfelt hope: that each of us can consciously pivot towards a "family first" culture.
When we place family at the forefront, we're not just fostering stronger relationships, we're also shaping future generations. It is - literally - how we change the world. Raising children with a strong emotional foundation, equipping them with the resilience to face the challenges that lie ahead - is not for the faint of heart. It's an epic adventure.
Exit the "family last" culture and rediscover the viable, available, and sustainable paths to deep meaning, belonging, and purpose.
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In my membership for parents, "The Studio", we put family FIRST. Learn more at hifam.com/studio
Learn the difference in whining between babies, kids, tweens, and teens and how our response as parents should change and evolve: a four-step process to respond to any whiny communication!
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Want to get your child playing independently and peacefully for 3 hours a day without screens, bribes, or buying a thing? Take our FREE Masterclass! (reclaimplay.com/haven) >
There's a massive focus today on defining, projecting, and expressing one's personal identity - also known as finding your "authentic self" and discovering "who you really are". Subsequently, there’s been a big shift in the advice parents are receiving in recent years. Basically, the way we answer the question, “How to live a good life?”, has changed dramatically and greatly impacts how we raise our children.
I open up this topic because my mission is to strengthen families and I can’t help but notice how weakening this focus on individual identity is. Let's get to the root of the matter and discover a more meaningful focus of childhood growth, development, and exploration.
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Want to get your child playing independently and peacefully for 3 hours a day without screens, bribes, or buying a thing? Take our FREE Masterclass! > (reclaimplay.com/haven)
If your child doesn't find porn, porn will find them... unless you get there first.
The average age for a child to begin to consume pornography is now 12 years old. Let's talk about how to protect our children from porn consumption.
Have young kids at home? Now is the time to educate yourself and empower your children with real conversations, tools, and scripts...
In this episode:
- What's so alluring about porn?
- What's lurking within arm's reach.
- Having a no-lie policy.
- Early sex education at home.
- Social media boundaries.
Build a life that is full, compelling, and exciting so your kids don't end up holed up in their rooms with screens for hours on end.
Want to get your child playing independently and peacefully for 3 hours a day without screens, bribes, or buying a thing? Take our FREE Masterclass! > (reclaimplay.com/haven)
Stroll down memory lane with me as I share the story behind why I created my online membership for parents over 6 years ago. 🎂 It's changed my life and the lives of thousands of other parents from over 100 countries around the world - just like you.
If you've ever felt isolated or judged 😔 in your parenting journey, this one's for you, my friend. In this episode, I'm opening up about how I longed for a warm, supportive community 🤗 to help me through the twists and turns of raising tiny humans. 🍼
But, like any good adventure, this one's got trials and tribulations too! I'll chat about how I was booted from Facebook groups (ouch) and how I devoured hundreds of parenting books 📚 (seriously, it's a wonder I didn't sprout paper cuts) in search of the guidance and knowledge I craved.
The cherry on top? 🍒 I'll reveal how all of that hard-earned wisdom is now packed into the Hi Fam membership, "The Studio" - enrollment opens soon! 💎 hifam.com/studio
⭐️ The best way to get started is to join the Dream Family Bootcamp! 🎉 Grab your FREE ticket here: hifam.com/bootcamp
It's time to create more joy, magic, togetherness, and connection in your day-to-day family life than you ever dreamed of!
It’s true that our children need a lot of warmth, love, nurturing, attunement, attention, and connection. And yes, children thrive when they’re given appropriate freedoms within boundaries and a limited amount of acceptable choices. But they also need something else, something I’ll outline in today’s podcast.
👉 Create more joy, magic, togetherness, and connection in your day-to-day family life than you ever dreamed of... Join us for the Dream Family Bootcamp LIVE EXPERIENCE! hifam.com/bootcamp
With today’s meteoric rise of anxiety and depression, it’s crucial that we, as parents, know how to help our children master the emotional rollercoasters that life throws at us. In this episode, I offer some ancient wisdom all parents in the modern world need: "Feelings Follow Actions".
If you’re in a funk, give this a try!
👉 Create more joy, magic, togetherness, and connection in your day-to-day family life than you ever dreamed of... Join us for the Dream Family Bootcamp LIVE EXPERIENCE! hifam.com/bootcamp
There are fragile substances, like glass: that break under pressure.
There are non-fragile substances, like steel: that don't break under pressure.
Then there are anti-fragile substances, like your immune system, or muscle tissue: that get stronger under pressure.
People need a bit of pressure and stress to become stronger... but the modern message today will tell you (and your kids): people are fragile.
Hi Fam says: Your family is antifragile. In this episode, you'll discover how to be antifragile and raise antifragile kids.
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Books mentioned:
- The Coddling of the American Mind
- Antifragile: Things That Gain From Disorder
Want to build a strong family culture and raise resilient kids? Join the Hi Fam Membership! Learn more at hifam.com
Take my FREE Masterclass to get your child playing for 3 hours a day - without screens, bribes, or buying a thing! How to Transform Your Home Into a Play-Inducing Haven (reclaimplay.com/haven)
“I love this show!” 👉 If that sounds like you please rate and review the show! This helps us support more people - just like you - to create a family life they love. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Why are today’s new generation opting out of having children at a rapid pace? Will our own children not want children? Should we care? How might this influence our well-being and sense of confidence as parents? Let’s talk about the birth rate drop and what it means for us parents.
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“I love this show!” 👉 If that sounds like you please rate and review the show! This helps us support more people - just like you - to create a family life they love. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ Thank you to today's sponsor, Sunsama - organizing your work one day at a time. Try a 14-day free trial here: https://try.sunsama.com/hifam Want to get your child playing for 3 hours a day without screens, bribes, or buying a thing? Take our FREE Masterclass! > (reclaimplay.com/haven)
Family togetherness is disintegrating. Family culture is a lost art. Family leadership is a lost skill. Feeling a sense of belonging is a lost way of life. Let's explore the 3 reasons why that's happening and what you can do to build an unbreakable family.
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“I love this show!” 👉 If that sounds like you please rate and review the show! This helps us support more people - just like you - to create a family life they love. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ Want to get your child playing for 3 hours a day without screens, bribes, or buying a thing? Take our FREE Masterclass! (reclaimplay.com/haven)
Want to build a strong family culture and raise resilient kids? Join the Hi Fam Membership! Learn more at hifam.com
You’re not imagining it: there’s an epidemic of narcissism. Like other epidemics, it’s not easy to identify the precise cause of this one. In this episode, we're delving into the difference between destructive and healthy narcissism, the failure of the self-esteem movement, and the practical steps we can take as parents to raise resilient kids who are destined for meaningful relationships.
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“I love this show!” 👉 If that sounds like you please rate and review the show! This helps us support more people - just like you - to create a family life they love. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ Thank you to today's sponsor, Sunsama - organizing your work one day at a time. Try a 14-day free trial here: https://try.sunsama.com/hifam Want to get your child playing for 3 hours a day without screens, bribes, or buying a thing? Take our FREE Masterclass! > (reclaimplay.com/haven)
Modern parenting trends dictate that we, as parents, must be authentic and help our children to “discover” their authentic selves. But what is “authentic”? The problem with this focus is that by staring at what you don’t like about yourself, you're left feeling clueless about how to move forward.
You might never discover some “true authentic self” no matter how many therapy sessions, journals, or meditations you throw at it. Or you might be disappointed by what you do discover.
That’s okay because as you’ll hear me argue in this podcast, your authentic self is not someone to be “discovered”, it’s someone you can “design”.
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“I love this show!” 👉 If that sounds like you please rate and review the show! This helps us support more people - just like you - to create a family life they love. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ Want to get your child playing for 3 hours a day without screens, bribes, or buying a thing? Take our FREE Masterclass! > (go to ReclaimPlay.com/haven)
Growth: The new purpose for marriage and reason for divorce.
You’re about to hear me pushback on a popular trend that isn’t helpful to our families. Before I begin I want you to know that there are many reasons that marriages end: legitimate reasons. Maybe you’re considering it or maybe you’ve already got divorced, or are in the process. Maybe your divorce happened because you were deeply unhappy, irreparably disconnected, or perhaps worse. Some marriages need to end. There should not be shame around divorce.
In society today we’re hearing a new reason for divorce pop up. This new reason seems to be used as a cover for something real, and if this is a thought that’s capturing you, you’ll probably want to face that real thing if you want a chance at holding on to your relationship, or at least before your next relationship. Because owning the truth, and facing the truth is the only way we can truly grow and move forward.
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“I love this show!” 👉 If that sounds like you please rate and review the show! This helps us support more people - just like you - to create a family life they love. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ Thank you to today's sponsor, Sunsama - organizing your work one day at a time. Try a 14-day free trial here: https://try.sunsama.com/hifam Want to get your child playing for 3 hours a day without screens, bribes, or buying a thing? Take our FREE Masterclass! > (reclaimplay.com/haven)
Society seems to be in a war between the offensive and the offended; between those who attack with facts and logic and those who follow heart and soul; between those who think and those who feel.
Just like many things in our life, the pendulum often swings from one extreme to the other and often, in a generational way. Many of us grew up in homes with a very different approach to emotions and feeling than what's popular today.
Should we honor facts or feelings? In this episode, you'll learn why this false dichotomy is hurting our families and how you can harness both sides to raise resilient kids.
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“I love this show!” —> If that sounds like you please rate and review the show! This helps us support more people - just like you - to create a family life they love. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Want to get your child playing for 3 hours a day without screens, bribes, or buying a thing? Take our FREE Masterclass! > (reclaimplay.com/haven)
Society is going to tell you that parenting is brutal and marriage is a bore (or worse). It will warn you about the sleepless nights, the stretch marks, and the cheerios in your hair. It will tell you that family life is exhausting, expensive, and full of sacrifice.
But do you ever get the feeling that 'there must be a better way?' Like there is something missing? Well, that’s what we’re going to address, right here.
Here, in Hi, Fam! we’re going to give you a whole new perspective. We’re going to help you craft a vision of family life that is meaningful, intentional, and even enjoyable. And offer the tools to put that vision into practice.
Today’s episode is all about the first step to take to get your family life on track, to put the pep back in your step, and to face anything that comes your way throughout the day. Let’s go!
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“I love this show!” —> If that sounds like you please rate and review the show! This helps us support more people - just like you - to create a family life they love. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Want to get your child playing for 3 hours a day without screens, bribes, or buying a thing? Take our FREE Masterclass! > (reclaimplay.com/haven)
Too many parents are burning out – doing everything for everyone else in their families and feeling completely drained by the end of each day. It doesn’t have to be this way! The truth is, what children need most are parents who feel good in their own skin, are well-cared for, and have great energy to tackle the day. The last thing they need are parents who feel resentful towards them for their own exhaustion.
In today’s episode, I’m going to share 8 tips on how to infuse a little more ‘selfishness’ into your life, prioritizing yourself in key areas so you can feel like a healthy human again!
↓ ↓ ↓ ↓ ↓
Join us on the TPJ App for the full-text version, private community discussion, and MUCH more: https://bit.ly/3pTCFn7
[02:56] 1. Start the day with you
[05:12] 2. Eat for you
[08:06] 3. Consume content for you
[10:59] 4. Go places you enjoy
[13:06] 5. Organize your home for you
[15:03] It's ok to set limits
[16:00] 6. Shop for you
[17:12] 7. Make friends for you
[20:09] 8. Say no for you
[22:24] We don’t have to entertain our kids or give them everything they want
Click here to get on the waitlist for Present Play!
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
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Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Anger Management Tips for Parents: How to Handle Anger in Parenting I've always been drawn to peaceful parenting, conscious parenting, gentle parenting - however, I have a temper! I get triggered. And most parents struggle with anger and yelling. The following parenting tips will help you minimize your triggers so you can love parenting and parent from love.
Don't stay stuck with the feeling that there's something wrong with you or something wrong with your child - let's break this down:
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Join us on the TPJ App for the full-text version, private community discussion, and MUCH more: https://bit.ly/3pTCFn7
0:00 How to Minimize Triggers
0:59 Present Play Membership opens in April (join the waitlist: www.theparentingjunkie.com/presentplay)
5:06 Anger is natural, but acting out of anger is destructive.
5:45 We overcomplicate anger management.
7:55 Being angry is very similar to being drunk.
14:36 Prefrontal cortex vs. amygdala.
16:04 The feelings will pass.
17:20 Once it passes, we can think clearly again.
18:43 It's a great opportunity to model for our children.
19:19 We can teach our children to take a break and calm down.
Click here to get on the waitlist for Present Play!
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
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Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Feeling hatred toward your child is a symptom of a different problem.
This is a controversial and taboo topic, but it's not that uncommon for parents to sometimes feel disgusted and think or say "Go away!" "Leave me alone." "I don't like you." "I don't want you." "I don't love you." "I hate you!" towards their kids.
So what's causing that very uncomfortable sensation and feeling? Don't stay stuck with the feeling that there's something wrong with you or something wrong with your child - let's break this down:
↓ ↓ ↓ ↓ ↓
Join us on the TPJ App for the full-text version, private community discussion, and MUCH more: https://bit.ly/3pTCFn7
[02:14] Feeling hatred toward your child is a symptom of a different problem
[03:59] 1. This is normal
[05:57] Even though it's normal there are things we can do about it
[07:25] 2. Change is constant
[10:35] 3. Your child might be going through a hard time right now
[12:37] 4. YOU might be going through a hard time right now
[14:43] 5. You don't hate your child; you hate their behaviors or temperament
[17:12] 6. Take a break
[19:03] 7. Coach yourself
[20:16] 8. Inhibit yourself
[21:28] 9. Imagine it’s your last day on earth
[22:42] 10. Envision your golden moments with your child
[24:00] 11. List out the things that are awesome about your child
[24:41] 12. Reframe their bad traits
[26:28] Correct their shadow side and celebrate their light side
[27:01] Traits we find difficult in childhood are often assets in adulthood
[27:20] 13. Engage in baby bonding behaviors
[28:22] 14. Use humor
[29:34] 15. Love is a choice
Click here to get on the waitlist for Present Play!
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Over the years I've been sharing things I'm learning about Parenting. Things I read in books, things I experiment on in my own lab (my family), and I've been sharing what has really resonated with me and what's worked for me.
But I must make a confession and expose the hypocrisy, the many contradictions and paradoxes that occur within me within my own mind, my family, my parenting practice, and what I outwardly preach.
There are many things that I am drawn to and believe in that I share with you. And then as time goes on, or perhaps just in the way that it resonates or works in my individual family and with my unique children, it didn't really work out that way or I opted for something else or I changed my mind.
In this episode I'm going to tell you about several things that I have preached outwardly that I still respect and support and believe in, but don't necessarily practice at home with my children.
[02:04] #1 Unschooling
[04:58] #2 Co-sleeping
[07:19] #3 Saying no
[08:53] #4 Time outs
[10:36] We pick and choose what works best for our family
[11:55] #5 Punishments
[14:37] #6 Monitoring content
[16:28] #7 Sticker charts
[18:31] #8 Minimalism
[20:08] #9 E.C. & cloth diapers
I hope that this liberates you from any dogmatic kind of thinking, any kind of perfectionism, any imagination or projection onto me that I am doing it perfectly. Because that is so far from the truth.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/110
So many of my clients and community members are stay-at-home parents; parents who aren't currently working or are working very minimally. A common struggle is a loss of identity or feeling like your value and your worth isn't recognized by others, or feeling like you've lost your confidence now that you “just stay at home with the kids”.
In this episode I’m going to share how you can boost your confidence as a stay at home parent so you can be super confident and proud of who you are and what you're doing.
[01:15] Stop minimizing
[02:26] Show up each day
[03:52] Value your contribution
[06:10] Be interesting
[08:26] Address your money mindset
[10:45] Switch from feeling apologetic to grateful
[13:06] Think about what you're giving your children
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- YouTube video How To Feel Phenomenal When You're a Mom (From Hot Mess to Energized!)
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/108
Every so often I'll get a note from a parent who's feeling guilty that they have to work so much and can't be home with their little kids.
So often these parents write to me saying they feel bad that the kids don't see them as much as they could, or they feel bad that they're distracted and that their attention is going elsewhere other than just their children.
I feel really passionate about this subject because here's one thing that I'm allergic to: dogmatic one-size-fits-all parenting advice.
When people make blanket statements like “mothers should be home with their babies” I think they’re missing so much nuance and it's really doing a huge disservice to all of us parents who are unique individuals with very unique circumstances. We're all different. Our children are all different. Our needs, aspirations, goals, beliefs, value systems, cultures, origins, and our resources are all different.
And therefore the answer is always going to be, as Magda Gerber said: It depends.
In this episode I’ll talk about why you should feel great if you’re a working parent.
[03:19] One isn't better than the other
[04:59] You're providing for your children
[05:48] Making money is part of parenting
[07:28] You're modeling for your children
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/108
Are you pregnant? If so, congratulations! And if you’d like your partner to be an amazing support to you during your birth (and who wouldn’t, right?) then this episode is for you.
[03:37] 1. Communicate well and often
[04:58] 2. Create a to-do list
[05:41] 3. Education
[08:28] 4. Explain what is supportive
[09:23] 5. Ensure they know it's not personal
[09:47] 6. Give them tools
[10:20] 7. Practice positions & massage/acupressure points
[11:29] 8. Empower them to stay calm and take ownership
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/107
At the time of this recording, I’m pregnant with my fifth child. So far I've given birth in hospitals and birthing centers, and for a long list of reasons this time around, I decided to have a home birth. In this episode I’ll be sharing how I've been preparing in order to set myself up for maximum success in my home birth.
This is a list of what has been working for me, and that I'm excited to do. Take and leave what works for you.
There are a million reasons to have, or to not have, a home birth. It's deeply personal. It 100% depends on your unique individual situation, and I'm not making any recommendations. You need to work with your healthcare providers and your intuition and do what’s best for you.
Also, all births are beautiful and all we really want is for ourselves and our baby to be healthy. So if this isn't in the cards for you, don't worry. All across the spectrum, from C-sections to unassisted home births, it can be an incredibly empowering experience. There's no one right way to birth your baby into the world.
[01:39] 1. Share with supportive people
[02:57] 2. Create a great team
[04:27] 3. Make preparations for your other children
[06:29] 4. Prepare your space.
[06:44] We want to increase calming hormones and decrease stress related hormones.
[08:41] 5. Prepare for the birthing process
[10:58] 6. Set aside something comfortable to wear
[12:00] 7. Set out some pictures
[12:25] 8. Have snacks on-hand
[14:10] 9. Put thought into your presentation and communication
[14:51] 10. Have the car seat ready to go
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- My friend Andrea’s video (Go Diaper Free) about having a free/unassisted home birth.
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/106
By the time you're reading this, I hope to have had my fifth baby. But at the time of this recording, I'm pregnant with number five, and I want to share some self-care tips for when you're pregnant. To some, self-care is a luxury. But I believe it’s a necessity.
It's been a hectic, crazy time in my life being home with my kids and running my business. Even so, I prioritize self-care and it has made this pregnancy so much more joyful for me.
And I want to share those tips with you because I think self care is something that sometimes goes out the window. When we're parents to young children, especially when we have a lot of stress going on, when we're busy with work or running a home, we often take care of everyone except ourselves.
Unfortunately, that is not a sustainable strategy. We are likely to burn out. We are likely to build resentment and we are likely to not perform the best that we can.
I know I’m so lucky to be able to do all of these things, and not everyone is able to prioritize self-care. So just like with all my work, take what works for you and leave the rest. It may or may not resonate. But if it does, I hope you find this helpful and inspiring!
[03:17] I like to feel put together and wear things that don't make me feel extra "frumpy"
[04:02] 1. Dress and get ready for the day
[07:10] 2. Move your body
[08:40] 3. Prioritize your sleep
[08:52] 4. Intermittent fasting
[11:44] 5. Eat well & take supplements
[12:29] 6. Address fears and past birthing trauma
[14:59] 7. Take care of your mind
[17:20] 8. Declutter, organize, and decorate
[18:38] 9. Make your home comfortable
[19:18] 10. Incorporate nature
[21:34] Ask yourself "How can I make this work for me?"
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- The Paula Method
- Pregnancy & birth meditations
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/105
If you would like your home to look more beautiful and sophisticated, even on an inexpensive budget while you have little kids at home, then this episode is for you.
My background is in graphics, branding, and identity design. I love talking and thinking about all things design. Primarily from the functional perspective, but also from the aesthetics.
I believe deeply that the things we see around us influence our psychology, influence our behavior, influence our emotions, and they matter. They're tools that we can use to influence how we feel and behave, and how our children feel and behave as well.
You can certainly spend a lot of money on this, but you don't have to. Even when buying things on a budget (or using what you already have), there are things you can do in order to make your home feel more sophisticated, more to your taste, even when there are little children around.
In this episode I'm going to cover 10 common areas that can be addressed to help your home feel more sophisticated and beautiful.
[02:10] #1 - Toy storage
[04:11] #2 - Kid's artwork
[05:19] #3 - Family pictures
[06:06] #4 - The entry way
[07:23] #5 - Household items
[08:27] #6 - Child specific items
[09:21] #7 - Continuously declutter
[10:09] #8 - Adult-like furniture
[12:03] #9 - Future-proof furniture
[13:06] #10 - Linens
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Join my membership, Present Play!
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/104
Have you heard of the law of attraction? It’s something that I read about and hear about often. And in fact, it’s something that I intuitively really connect to and practice in my life. Today I'm going to talk with you about how I use the law of attraction to create a life that I love, and invite you to do the same!
[05:30] #1 - Get clear on what you want
[08:55] #2 - Focus on what you want
[10:01] #3 - Ignore what you don't want
[14:41] #4 - Practice gratitude
[15:16] #5 - Elevate your expectations
[20:53] "Live life as if everything is rigged in your favor." Rumi
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Check out my free Facebook group, Love Parenting With Avital
- Join my membership, Present Play!
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/103
Are you finding yourself in survival mode, feeling like you are running on empty and worried that you might be leading yourself to burnout? If you’re not sure where you fall on the burnout spectrum, go check out last week’s episode on the 10 signals that you might be in survival mode.
Now that we know the signs, it’s time to get practical and do something about it.
What we really want to do is get our expectations to meet our level of support, and work on both sides of that equation. On one hand we need to be realistic about our expectations and in some ways lower the bar. But we can also work on increasing our level of support or perhaps reduce our level of responsibilities.
Let’s dig in and talk about how we can conserve energy and recharge so that we can push ourselves out of survival mode and thrive.
[02:22] #1 - Simplify everything
[02:56] #2 - Use more screen time
[04:05] #3 - Lower your learning expectations
[05:03] #4 - Lower your presence expectations
[06:31] #5 - Write out helpful scripts
[10:11] #6 - Ask for help (and accept it)
[12:11] #7 - Let people in
[13:29] #8 - Prioritize self-care
[15:20] #9 - Positive self-talk
[16:50] #10 - Enlist your children's help
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Check out my free Facebook group, Love Parenting With Avital
- Join my membership, Present Play!
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/102
One of the biggest risks we face as parents is burning out and falling into survival mode. In difficult seasons it becomes especially challenging to stay charged and energized. Many of us (myself included) run the risk of burning out when we don’t take care of ourselves and “refuel our tank.” You can only run on empty for so long.
I have seen so many parents on the brink of burnout (or fully in it), and I’ve been there as well. It's a major issue.
So today I want to share with you 10 signs you want to look for that might be telling you that your tank is empty, that you're about to enter survival mode.
[02:09] #1 - You're constantly stressed
[03:10] #2 - You get triggered a lot
[04:06] #3 - Meeting basic needs is a struggle
[05:52] #4 - Everything feels urgent
[06:42] #5 - There’s a sense of impending doom
[07:31] #6 - You feel like you're failing
[09:29] #7 - You’re stuck in the present moment
[10:21] #8 - You feel isolated
[11:48] #9 - You feel helpless
[12:47] The level of expectations in our lives must match the level of support
[13:38] #10 - You feel like you can't measure up
Now that you know the signs, it’s time to do something about it. Check back in next week because I'm going to share a sequel to this and talk about what we can do to get out of survival mode.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Check out my free Facebook group, Love Parenting With Avital
- Join my membership, Present Play!
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/101
Most of us know that feeling of preparing a lovely meal for our children, sitting down to eat it with them only to have our toddler promptly THROW IT ON THE FLOOR 😡 😭 🤦🏽♀️
It can be so aggravating. If you're not sure how to handle the situation and it's repeating in your home, you are so not alone. Let's talk about what we can do about it.
[00:58] #1 - Normalize it
[01:41] Trajectory schema
[02:32] #2 - Stay calm
[04:13] #3 - Say what you want to see
[05:00] #4 - Don't play the game
[06:36] #5 - Give them alternatives
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- YouTube Video About Schemas
- Childhood Design Guide
- Join my membership, Present Play!
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/100
Do you struggle to get your kids out the door in the morning? Are you ever late for things because you’re arguing with your kids or having trouble getting them ready for the day? You’re not alone. Kristen from our Present Play community asked for advice about how to deal with this.
In this episode I’ll discuss my thoughts and help you get back your sanity!
[00:38] Kristen's question: How can I motivate my child to get ready more quickly?
[03:37] More love isn't always the answer
[06:59] Natural consequences are great when they can play themselves out.
[07:32] Are there any morning activities that will be missed if they aren't ready in time?
[08:26] Your frustration and depleted patience is a natural consequence too.
[09:29] Try playful parenting
[11:26] Set a clear boundary and follow through
[15:37] Avoid power struggles.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Join my membership, Present Play!
- Book Playful Parenting by Lawrence Cohen
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/99
Do you have a little toddler at home and you're tearing your hair out, trying to find ways to keep this person busy without always resorting to screens?
If so, I've got you. I totally feel it. And I am here with five ways that toddlers generally love playing independently and that you can use today to keep your little person occupied and busy without screens.
[00:53] #1 - Sensory Play
[04:30] #2 - Movement
[06:17] #3 - Music
[07:21] #4 - Dressing up
[08:52] #5 - Pretend play
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Join my membership, Present Play!
- Download your Childhood Design Guide
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/98
Can babies play independently? Is that even possible? Or is it something that only develops later (if at all)? The answer is...they can! And in this episode I’m going to talk about 10 ways they can play and how to encourage them to do so.
[01:05] #1 - Don't entertain your baby
[02:39] #2 - Le Pause
[04:13] #3 - Don't overstimulate - keep it simple
[06:23] #4 - Don't interfere
[07:52] #5 - Keep things low
[09:20] #6 - Keep trying
[10:59] #7 - Try different times
[12:43] #8 - Try different positions
[13:38] #9 - Make sure they're comfortable
[14:21] #10 - Experiment with music
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Join my membership, Present Play!
- Join our free Facebook community, Love Parenting with Avital
- How To Create A YES space (video)
- Book "Secrets Of The Baby Whisperer" by Tracy Hogg
- Book “Bringing Up Bébé” by Pamela Druckerman
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/97
When you’re pregnant, it can be so hard to get enough sleep. Between the hormones and feeling so uncomfortable, it can be very hard to sleep. And if you have other children or issues in the mix, it can be even more challenging to get the rest we need.
While there certainly are some things outside of our control, there are quite a few things that are within our control. In that light, I’d like to offer 10 suggestions to help you prioritize sleep so you can get more rest.
[01:39] 1. Keep your bedroom clean and tidy
[03:11] 2. Use calming fragrances
[03:37] 3. Use comfy PJs and sheets
[04:58] 4. Keep your room cooler
[06:11] 5. Use comfy pillows
[06:51] 6. Reduce light exposure
[10:04] 7. Talk to your health care provider about sleep supplements
[11:25] 8. Drink more water in the morning and less in the evening
[12:05] 9. Try out some gadgets and gizmos
[13:36] 10. Go to bed earlier
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Join my membership, Present Play!
- Join our free Facebook community, Love Parenting with Avital
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/96
Do you ever hate this whole parenting thing? There’s absolutely no shame here...I think most parents feel this way at some point in their parenting journey.
In this episode I’m going to cover 10 reasons you might hate parenting, and most importantly what you can do about it.
[00:53] 1 - haven't come to terms with your own childhood
[03:02] 2 - You're still waiting to be parented yourself
[05:39] 3 - Your home is a mess
[07:29] 4 - You haven't stepped into your leadership role yet
[10:06] 5 - You're giving waaaay too much of yourself
[13:40] 6 - You're not addressing key behaviors that are disruptive
[16:06] 7 - You're not sleeping enough
[19:00] 8 - You're not making it fun for you
[22:33] 9 - You're comparing yourself to others
[25:18] 10 - You have a fixed mindset
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Join my membership, Present Play!
- Join our free Facebook community, Love Parenting with Avital
- Check out the book Parenting From The Inside Out by Dan Siegel
- Check out the book Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol Dweck
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/95
Let’s talk depression. First I want to say that I have gone through seasons where I needed professional help, and there’s absolutely no shame in that. If you feel you need some help, please don’t hesitate. It can make a world of difference.
But even if you’re not feeling clinically depressed, it’s common to go through seasons of feeling “the blues” or feeling down. Thankfully, there are some things we can do to help bolster our mood and help us feel better!
In this episode I’m going to give you 15 things you can do when you’re feeling down.
[00:45] 1 - Normalize
[02:56] 2 - Express don't suppress
[04:23] 3 - Seek professional help
[05:54] 4 - Do "The Work" by Byron Katie
[06:40] 5 - Get outside
[07:18] 6 - Get a listening partnership
[08:33] 7 - Get enough sleep
[09:14] 8 - Move your body
[10:09] 9 - Laugh (watch some comedy)
[10:47] 10 - Pamper yourself
[11:25] 11 - Eat well
[12:58] 12 - Check if you need supplements or a dietary change
[13:14] 13 - Cleanse your mental diet
[14:41] 14 - Take a break from social media
[15:10] 15 - Help others
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources mentioned:
- Book "Loving What Is" By Byron Katie
- Join my membership, Present Play!
Books about CBT:
- Cognitive Therapy and the Emotional Disorders by Aaron Beck
- Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy by David Burns
- CBT Made Simple by Seth J. Gillihan (I haven’t read this...yet. It looks promising)
Books about mindset:
- Don't Just Sit There!: 44 Insights to Get Your Meditation Practice Off the Cushion and Into the Real World by Biet Simkin
- Everything Is Figureoutable by Marie Forleo
- The Universe Has Your Back: Transform Fear to Faith by Gabby Bernstein
- Ask and It Is Given: Learning to Manifest Your Desires by Esther & Jerry Hicks
- Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life by Wayne Dyer
- The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment by Eckhart Tolle
- The Gifts of Imperfection by Brene Brown
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/94
Do you feel overwhelmed by your life at home with young children? I’m a mother of 5, I run my own business, I homeschool part-time...I have a lot on my plate (and I’m sure you do too).
It can be so easy to feel overwhelmed! But we’re not helpless. There are things within our control that can make a big difference and reduce the overwhelm in our lives.
In this episode I’ll give you 10 tips to help you reduce the overwhelm.
[00:52] #1 Declutter
[02:37] #2 Create storage systems
[03:58] #3 Clean as you go
[06:01] #4 Batch your cooking
[08:03] #5 Develop consistency & routine
[10:18] #6 Buy things in sets
[12:05] #7 Store similar things together
[14:21] #8 Create a family color pallette
[16:36] #9 Get clear on your vision
[17:53] #10 Put systems in place
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Podcast episode 90 about creating a great atmosphere at home
- Present Play
In our culture it’s quite acceptable to wear yoga pants all day, have cheerios in your hair, have spit up on your shirt, and always look a little bit like a hot mess once you become a mom.
And you know what? It’s OK if you do! Being a mom is exhausting and demanding.
Compared to the childless life, it’s a lot harder to look and feel phenomenal as you’re running around after toddlers all day, taking care of newborns all night, chauffeuring kids around all day, preparing lunches, making loads of meals, washing loads of dishes, cleaning all the time, and the list goes on. I get it. I really get it.
I’m not a lifestyle, fashion and makeup guru, but I do know this: when I feel put together, somewhat taken care of, and I like the way that I look, I operate better. I’m a much more patient, upbeat, and positive person.
So I happen to think that it’s an incredibly powerful parenting tool to make yourself feel like the best version of yourself. When we feel good and feel confident going out into the world we have more energy to show up for our children with more love, patience, energy, space and joy! We just have more of ourselves to give.
In this episode I’ll give you 8 tips to help feel phenomenal as a mom with littles!
[02:33] #1 - Don't snooze
[05:07] #2 - Get dressed in the morning
[06:51] #3 - Do something to take care of yourself in the morning
[08:29] #4 - Add fragrance to yourself and/or your home
[09:41] #5 - Play music you love
[11:00] #6 - Make food you love
[13:55] #7 - Take time to do little things for yourself throughout the day.
[15:58] #8 - Take care of yourself at night
[19:03] Speaking of nighttime...go to bed earlier!
[20:42] Feeling phenomenal as a parent is a form of good parenting!
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
In this episode I’ll be addressing a question from a member of our Present Play community.
Tracy from Georgia asked what to do when your children use rude or inappropriate language, and also how to address their negative self-talk.
Thank you for your question Tracy! You are certainly not alone in this struggle. All parents are presented with these challenges (including myself).
There are a few ways to go about it, but I'd like to talk about my preferred approach.
[04:59] Keep in mind: Childhood development is a slow process. Changes are gradual and it takes time, repetition, and consistency.
[06:22] Typical approach #1: Authoritarian Approach
[09:02] Typical approach #2: Permissive Approach
[11:20] 3rd option: Be calm but firm and address the situation.
[12:16] We have to be responsive to the situation, but not reactive.
[12:30] Step 1: Pause, breathe, and calm yourself down. Then state clearly and calmly to yourself and your child what you DO want to see.
[13:23] Say to yourself "I will respond when I've gathered myself and collected my thoughts."
[15:14] Step 2: Calmly explain what will happen if they continue. Just a logical consequence for continuing.
[17:00] It's not a threat or punishment. We're trying to teach them what the results of certain behaviors are.
[17:34] Step 3: Follow through immediately.
[21:13] How to address a child's negative self talk.
[22:38] Center yourself. This is a normal part of childhood and every child needs to work through it.
[25:22] Help them focus on the right things.
[25:53] We're trying to teach our children what advances their agenda and what takes away from it.
[30:36] The energy at which we have these interactions is the most important factor.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
When you’re home with young children it can feel really overwhelming and stressful. Between all the messes, the tantrums, the whining, the noise, and the smells, it can make your home a place you want to escape from instead of a place to escape to.
In this episode I’ll give you 10 practical tips to bring more pleasure, peace, joy, fun, and energy into your home.
[02:07] #1 - Add some plants
[04:51] #2 - Play music
[06:23] #3 - Use aromas and fragrances
[08:11] #4 - Keep surfaces clear
[11:06] #5 - Decorate with affirming words
[12:55] #6 - Print and display family photos
[14:49] #7 - Use neutral colors
[17:46] #8 - Use natural and soft lighting
[20:15] #9 - Add beautiful objects (and remove ugly objects)
[24:31] #10 - Comfortable furniture pieces
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/90
Do you ever feel like you don't want to do this anymore? This parenting thing, I mean. The nagging, the fighting, the wining, the dishes, the laundry, feeling tired and drained and sometimes, hopeless. Angry. Vengeful.
Exhausted.
We all go through seasons like this. But the good news is we don’t have to stay there. One thing that can make a huge difference and give you the extra push to get through the lows is to create a vision for your family.
That’s what I want to talk about today.
[02:53] What do we do when we don't feel like we can keep going?
[04:37] That's why it's so important to have a vision.
[05:35] We need to understand what it's all for.
[06:07] We all need a vision for our families
[06:57] If you don't already have one, it's time to start working on it!
[07:18] Examples, to get the creative juices flowing...
[07:54] It needs to be meaningful. Something to get you up in the morning. Something worth fighting for.
[08:44] If you'd like help crafting yours, I've put together a package to guide you through the process step by step.
Creating a big juicy vision for your family will help you push through the challenging times. It’ll provide a north star, a guiding light, taking you closer to what you really want for you and your family.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Ready to create the vision for your family?
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/89
Many people find they lose aspects of their identity when they have kids. Can you relate? This year has certainly made it more challenging to hold onto our identities. Many things in our lives have been “lost” (or put on hold) during the pandemic, and it has been hard.
If you’re feeling like you’ve lost yourself, this episode is for you.
[00:36] Join me in my free challenge, Finish Strong!
[05:34] Ready to create the vision for your family?
[05:39] Many of us feel a loss of identity as we enter parenthood.
[05:56] Let's evaluate the source of our identity
[06:57] Changes in life can change our identities.
[08:05] The things we are or do make for superficial identities.
[09:48] Where else can we find our identity?
[12:36] Start focusing more on the "how" and less on the "what"
As we start to focus more on how we show up, how we go about our days, we’ll find that our identities are much more stable and steady in the face of adversity. The “what” might change, but how we show up remains constant.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Join me in my free challenge, Finish Strong!
- Ready to create the vision for your family?
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/88
Everyone makes mistakes and experiences failures. We all have shortcomings, weaknesses, and areas of lack. And many people are stuck in a fixed mindset, thinking that it’s just how they are.
But not everyone.
Some people have adopted a growth mindset, and see mistakes and failures in a different (and positive) light. Do you want to be one of them?
Join me in this episode as we discuss how to do just that.
[00:36] Join me in my free challenge, Finish Strong!
[02:36] Do you feel like there have been some mistakes either on your part or other people's part?
[03:20] Many people are stuck in a Fixed Mindset
[04:31] We can decide to change and grow.
[05:23] How my 97 year old grandma stays young and vibrant
[06:32] It's tragic when people say things like "that's just how I am"
[06:42] Our brains have plasticity and we can continue to change and learn
[07:07] Adopt a growth mindset
[07:47] Successful people view their mistakes and failures as learning opportunities.
[08:36] Do you beat yourself up over mistakes and failures?
[09:25] Everything is in a constant state of change.
We don't have to stay stuck. We can change, adapt, and grow (and so can our kids). Let’s start to view our mistakes and failures as learning opportunities and continue to improve and develop.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Join me in my free challenge, Finish Strong!
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/87
Kids (and adults, if we’re being honest) often have a rigid way of thinking. It’s often black or white, all or nothing. We see our truth, and find it hard to understand that someone else may have a different truth.
But life (and people) are much more complex and nuanced than that, and we often live with a duality that can be hard to cope with. Today we’re going to talk about a hallmark of maturity that can help us (and our kids) deal with this.
[01:14] Join me in my free challenge, Finish Strong!
[02:50] Children often have a rigid way of thinking
[04:16] The ability to hold 2 conflicting truths at the same time is a hallmark of maturity.
[05:09] Let's replace the word "but" & “or” with "and"
[06:44] Sometimes we can feel both a like and dislike for the same thing. What do we do with that?
[08:01] It's immature to reduce things or people down to just one thing, all or nothing.
[08:32] Let's try to coach our kids and introduce them to other perspectives.
As we experience challenges and difficult circumstances (and difficult people), Let's try to use "and" more than "or" or "but". Let’s give people space for their complex views and truths and realize that we all live with some duality in our lives.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Join me in my free challenge, Finish Strong!
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/86
Are you going through something tough in your life? A big transition, problems at home or in your relationships, financial struggles. Maybe you haven’t had the support you’re used to and you feel like you’re drowning. It could even be a series of trivial things that normally wouldn’t amount to much, but with the year we’ve been having...let’s just say it’s been hard on many of us.
When we experience challenges, we often go through a process of grief (even on “small” stuff). There’s a typical progression of 5 stages that most of us go through, and today I want to talk about that and what CAN come after stage 5.
[02:43] Has 2020 been a rough year for you? Are you longing for some change (in the right direction)? Join me in my free challenge, Finish Strong!
[04:53] Stage 1: Denial
[06:22] Stage 2: Anger
[06:48] Stage 3: Bargaining
[07:39] Stage 4: Depression
[08:19] Stage 5: Acceptance
[09:26] What comes after acceptance?
[10:57] Stage 6: The silver lining
[14:45] How we can coach our children through this.
We certainly are justified staying in any stage. But we can choose to move forward and search for the silver lining in our challenges, finding the gifts and blessings that are there for the taking.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/85
Have you (or your child) experienced rough times? Are you having a hard time dealing with them? If so, this episode is for you.
[01:29] Has 2020 been a rough year for you? Are you longing for some change (in the right direction)? Join me in my free challenge, Finish Strong!
[05:58] Mindset is so important when it comes to challenges we’ve faced.
[07:18] Integrate any trauma we have experienced.
[09:31] When someone has made sense of their narrative, they go a long way toward healing.
[10:27] How can we use this today?
[12:08] Here's an example: When a child falls down
[14:14] Talk through what happened.
[14:51] But wait...do we really want to relive trauma?
[17:01] Eventually it becomes boring (or at least loses it's edge).
[17:41] Example from my life: Childbirth trauma
[19:55] Start working through the story of this past year.
It’s time to put in some work! Start working through your story, talking about what happened, and begin to integrate it into your narrative. It’ll begin the healing process and you’ll find it’ll start to lose it’s sting.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Join me in my free challenge, Finish Strong!
- Daniel Siegel’s book Parenting From the Inside Out
Full Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/84
For some reason we sometimes downplay our roles as parents. We often say things like “I’m just a mom/dad”, and at times don’t approach it with the same zest and zeal we would in our career or other leadership role. Why is that?
Today I want to discuss parenting and how I think our role as a parent is like being a CEO.
[00:31] Parenting is a high stakes "job" (I know it's a relationship and not a job...but hear me out).
[01:02] But we often downplay our role as a parent.
[01:53] As parents, we're CEOs of our families.
[03:46] The work we do as parents is meaningful and important.
[04:35] Let's start thinking of ourselves as CEOs
[04:51] Let's show up with zest, joy, and interest.
[05:00] Let's take pride in the work we're doing. We're not "just" moms or dads. We're leaders.
[05:54] We should invest in ourselves like a CEO. Read books, listen to podcasts, learn more about our craft.
[07:01] People who are "successful" aren't necessarily more talented. They're often relentless in their pursuit of growing in their craft.
Let’s approach our parenting like we would a CEO role in a business, and work toward mastery in our craft!
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
We all want our kids to be resilient. We want them to be critical thinkers. We want them to be respectful, to value diversity, and be tolerant of various lifestyles and backgrounds. Right?
Just like our immune system needs to be challenged by foreign substances, our values, beliefs, and opinions are bolstered and improved by being challenged.
In this episode I’m going to discuss why our kids need to be exposed to alternative points of view in order to become healthy, functioning adults.
[00:43] Have you seen "The Social Dilemma"?
[04:05] We are living in an echo chamber.
[08:18] Each of us are living in our own little universe online
[10:25] If we want our kids to develop critical thinking skills, they must be exposed to alternative points of view.
[12:24] We need to resist the urge to "protect" our kids from any views or opinions that we don't agree with.
[13:32] Shielding your child from an idea makes them more vulnerable to that idea.
[15:43] We want our children to learn how to discern.
[16:23] We want our kids to develop balanced and nuanced opinions.
[17:34] Even some of the best ideas, when taken to the extreme, can become unhealthy.
[19:04] If we want to stay balanced, we need to be exposed to alternative viewpoints.
[20:30] Hearing alternative points of view can bolster yours.
[22:33] I want to teach my children that everyone is at least worth listening to.
[23:23] We want our kids to develop empathy and diversity.
[25:25] I want my kids to understand that it's ok for others to believe differently, live differently, vote differently, etc.
[28:06] I use a Socratic method of asking questions to help my kids think through an idea or opinion.
[29:15] There's always something to learn from other people.
[29:54] Ideas are something that we can contend with.
[31:48] I want my children to understand that we all have more in common with others than what divides us.
If we want our kids to develop empathy & critical thinking, to value diversity & tolerance and understand that it’s ok for people to live and believe differently than us, we need to be purposeful about exposing them to alternative points of view. We need to show them that we can contend with ideas, and lead the way as we discern information and value what other people have to say.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Join our new course, Depolarize!
Have you ever been shamed or humiliated in front of people? Whether it was during school, a social event, or even online, most of us have been publicly shamed at some point.
How did it make you feel? Did it make you want to change? Did it feel good? Did it feel like they had your best interest at heart? Odds are good your answer is no.
So why do some think that it’s ok to continue this into adulthood, especially online?
In this episode I’m going to discuss the call-out culture and what we can do instead.
[01:53] The "callout culture” is spreading like a wild fire...even though public shaming was done away with as a legal form of punishment.
[05:37] What's true in the micro is true in the macro.
[06:35] “How we live each day is how we live our entire lives.”
[09:10] Why do some believe you shouldn't publicly shame children, but have no problem doing it to adults?
[10:34] The trend of publicly shaming & calling people out online.
[11:59] What child psychology tells us about public shaming.
[14:29] Why is it ok to publicly shame adults?
[18:47] What should we do when we see or hear something we don't like?
[20:50] Often inaction is the "higher road".
[23:20] Let's make a culture and society that allows a margin for error.
[24:11] In the moments where you need to say something, let's call people in.
[28:15] Let's be curious, humble, and give others the benefit of the doubt.
[29:53] We don't influence our children (or anyone) by attacking them or shaming them.
The call-out culture is unhealthy for us, public shaming doesn’t work (and was outlawed for a reason) and people react negatively to being humiliated. Let’s all do our part to end the call-out culture.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Join our new course, Depolarize!
Do you ever feel like you’re struggling under the weight of being an adult? Managing your time, finances, relationships, emotions, children, etc...sometimes life can feel so out of control.
Then you add in anxiety, fear, and worry about things going on around you and in the world at large...it’s no wonder so many people are suffering and feel stuck.
In this episode I’ll discuss these challenges and talk about what we can do to overcome them.
[03:08] Wednesday's workshop, 9/30/20 @11a Eastern Time
[06:07] What does it mean to be an adult?
[13:15] The difference between adults and grown-ups.
[13:49] Grown-ups have their emotional life in order.
[15:53] Grown-ups have their psychological life in order.
[20:52] Grown-ups have their spiritual life in order.
[21:31] Immature people are obsessed with themselves and others' thoughts and opinions.
[27:18] The key to finding meaning and joy in life is to grow ourselves up.
[31:33] How do we grow up? Mindset work.
[32:40] How do we get our emotional life in order?
[33:13] We must start to take responsibility for feelings and emotions, and start making different choices.
[33:52] How do we get our psychological life in order?
[38:49] How do we get our spiritual life in order?
[43:23] What does it look like to "show up"?
Q&A Section
[55:41] How many people are in the group coaching sessions?
[56:08] Is this coaching for kids or parents?
[56:39] How do you manage a relationship with a family member who is an adult but not a grown-up?
[59:30] How do you break out of these immature cycles when you feel stuck there?
This sort of work (mindset work) is where real change takes place. It’s what takes us to the next level and helps us work toward levels of peace, enjoyment, and fulfillment we all crave and deserve. Let’s get to work!
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Attend Wednesday's webinar “The Unstuck Workshop: 5 scripts you need to flip right now to stop going insane.”
- Join our new course, Alchemize!
Do you ever struggle with fear, frustration, worry, anxiety, or negative thoughts?
There can be this running voice in our heads that constantly makes us feel like we're not enough, like we're messing up, like we're a failure. It can be so easy to feel offended, feel like a victim, feel upset, worried, anxious, scared, fearful, doubtful, etc.
In this episode I'm going to talk about how our mindsets are everything, and share a little bit about my own personal story of how my mindset helped me turn things around. And more importantly, how you can too.
[03:43] I used to be so easily offended and shaken up.
[06:13] Our mindset and how we frame things is a huge differentiator in how we experience life.
[14:43] Framing things in a positive light can be very challenging, however.
[17:37] External circumstances don't necessarily link directly to a person's internal experience.
[20:51] How can two people who've been through the same traumatic experience turn out so differently?
[24:07] What mindsets can help us turn things around when we feel stuck, frustrated, hurt, etc.?
[27:22] People have the capacity to change when they want to.
[29:32] We must start to think about how we think about things.
[31:54] In any given situation, we have a choice about our mindset around it.
[32:08] There's a difference between reacting and responding.
[33:20] We can't control much of what happens in the world, but we can control ourselves and how we respond.
We can choose to stay stuck in a fixed mindset, or we can adopt a growth mindset and become the people we want to be. The choice is ours. What will you choose?
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Our new course Alchemize opens today!
There seems to be some confusion in our culture between criticism and critique. While criticism can be unhelpful and hurtful, critique is necessary to help us grow, develop, and make wise choices. It’s how things improve!
You’ve probably heard the saying “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.” I sometimes get feedback like this when I talk about school or issues in parenting. And I agree! We should always be kind. But perhaps we need to redefine what's "nice."
In this episode I want to discuss the differences between criticism and critique, and how I think critique is necessary and helpful.
[02:24] What design school taught me about criticism.
[05:47] It can be helpful to de-personalize critiques & criticism.
[06:59] We shouldn't say something if it isn't nice, but perhaps we need to redefine what's "nice."
[07:50] We need to be able to discuss the merits and the downsides of various things.
[08:39] Before you speak, ask yourself if what you are going to say is true, is kind, is necessary, is helpful. If the answer is no, maybe what you are about to say should be left unsaid.” -Bernard Meltzer
[09:38] Differences between criticism and critique.
[13:49] Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible. -Dalai Lama
[13:54] It's possible to point out things that need to be changed or improved without being unkind.
[14:42] We need to be less fragile, and handle critique.
[16:01] We don't have to shut down conversations just because there's critique involved.
[16:42] The ability to critique is an incredible skill to have.
[18:38] Critique is how we learn & grow, and it's a sign of maturity.
Critique is something we all need to be open to hearing, and open to giving. It’s a skill we can develop, and can greatly enhance our lives and the lives of our children.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
How do you express your love? Is it the same way you receive love? How do your kids experience your love? In this episode I’ll discuss the five love languages coined by Gary Chapman and add my take on them. PLUS I’m adding a 6th one to the list.
[02:13] Gary Chapman’s “The Five Love Languages”
[03:19] This can help us understand each other and improve our relationships.
[06:06] These can change as we change.
[07:42] Avoid feelings like you're not good enough.
[09:54] Words of affirmation
[11:50] Physical touch
[13:46] Quality time
[16:23] Acts of service
[20:08] You may not excel at every single one...and that's ok! Most of us are stronger in some and weaker in
[20:34] Gift giving
[22:13] My addition (love language #6): Visionary Leadership
I know sometimes it can feel futile, putting all this work into taking care of and loving our children.
It can leave us wondering whether they’ll remember any of it and if it will make a difference. I believe it will make a BIG difference! You’re embedding this into their being.
They may not realize it until they’re older, but at some point you’ll see the fruit of your hard work!
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman
- Peaceful Tantrums [Free] Training
Marriage should not be a cause of pain and suffering. OR AT LEAST, should not ONLY be a cause of pain and suffering.
It should also be a source of great energy and joy, and should be enhancing and boosting our life. It should make life easier and more enjoyable, having this companion and life partner by our side.
But so often I’m seeing the opposite. Instead of being mostly good with some challenges, I’m seeing big challenges and lots of stress, with very little joy.
In this episode I want to take you through a set of common beliefs about marriage, and why I think they’re wrong.
[04:27] Limiting belief #1: Marriages don't work out.
[09:12] Limiting belief #2: The ONLY way to improve your relationship is with counseling.
[15:01] Limiting belief #3: You chose the wrong partner.
[22:56] Limiting belief #4: My partner will never change.
[26:46] Limiting belief #5: It would be easier alone.
[32:26] Limiting belief #6: I'm too tired and/or busy to do ALL the work.
[44:02] Limiting belief #7: What if I try and it doesn't work?
[46:52] Marriage is like Mt. Everest.
[50:10] So how do you do it? What do you do to build the relationship of your dreams?
[52:30] https://theparentingjunkie.com/parentinlove
Q&A
[54:52] If we're already in Present Play, can we join Parent In Love too?
[55:17] Do you get the coaching if you're already in Parent In Love?
[55:58] Is there a payment plan for Parent In Love?
[56:23] Is Parent In Love applicable if my partner doesn't go through the course?
[58:34] How much does it cost?
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Check out our course, Parent In Love (and join soon before the group coaching bonus goes away!).
Has your relationship suffered after children were thrown into the mix? Chances are good that it has. I’ve certainly gone through ups and downs, and my friends and clients have too. While challenges certainly are inevitable, life-long suffering in your relationship doesn’t have to be.
In this episode I’m going to ask some questions and even give you a little tough love to inspire and encourage you to do what it takes to turn things around!
[01:03] How did your relationship change after having kids?
[04:26] We often neglect the relationship with our partner
[07:02] Deep down we all know our relationships are important. But many people underestimate just how important they really are.
[11:40] The relationship with our partner is the most important relationship of our life.
[17:03] We have to admit when things aren't going well before we can start to turn things around.
[17:43] Most of us weren't taught how to have successful relationships.
[22:17] It's hard, but worth the fight! It's worth what it takes!
[23:12] Myth: We should put our kids before ourselves.
[24:18] Your relationship becomes the “relationship curriculum” for your children.
[27:02] Relationships are like plants. Take care of them, or they wither and die.
[29:47] We have to stop hiding behind our children.
[31:49] It's time to wake up! The plant is wilting and needs attention.
[33:22] If there's something you're wishing for or desiring, it's safe to assume your partner has a similar wish or desire.
[34:40] It's not too late to start making changes!
[38:00] New mini-course: Worth The Fight
[39:11] New mini-course: Got To Grow
Q&A
[44:17] Do you have specific suggestions about how to fight?
[45:17] What is the difference between the Power Couple Workshop and the course?
[46:25] Is it worth the fight if I'm the only one who tries to work on the relationship?
[55:37] Which course is better for just starting out?
[56:19] What if my partner drinks alcohol and is very hard to be with or talk with after dinner?
[58:02] Can I pay with PayPal?
It’s not too late to get to work and build the relationship of your dreams! It’s worth the fight and you (and your children) are worth the effort it takes to turn things around. Let’s roll up our sleeves and get to work!
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Our mini-courses, Worth The Fight & Got To Grow
Do you feel like you carry the bulk of the load in your relationship? Like all the responsibility falls on you? Like the division of labor and the mental and emotional burden isn’t fair?
It’s understandable...and it’s also ruining our relationships.
In this episode I’m going to walk you through a series of questions to help you shift your mindset and improve your relationship with your partner.
[02:16] Are you keeping a running tab of "who does what" in your head?
[04:05] Keeping score undermines your partnership.
[07:59] A transactional approach to relationships is a major cause of division and conflict in relationships.
[13:36] Is there really such a thing as equality in a relationship?
[14:16] Do you really want things to be totally even, all the time?
[14:43] Does keeping score promote unconditional love?
[15:58] Does it feel good when you pit yourself against your partner?
[16:07] Does nitpicking your partner make you love them more or less?
[16:32] When you keep track of how much you give, does that make you a better or worse version of yourself?
[16:53] What does your partner do that you appreciate greatly?
[17:19] What does it mean to you to love someone and accept them as they are?
[17:27] How does that look, and how do you know when you're practicing that?
[17:33] Ultimately, are you displaying unconditional love through it all?
[18:10] What's the difference between trying to change someone and trying to evolve with someone and influence them?
[18:30] What does your partner appreciate in you that you might be forgetting or discounting?
[18:42] What competencies, energies, and skills do you each bring to the relationship?
[18:57] Should we be forcing each other to bring the exact same qualities to the table?
[19:23] Or should you each be contributing to the best of your abilities in our own special way?
[19:32] What's the meaning of seasons in life?
[20:01] Are you accounting for the differences in personalities, temperaments, and abilities you each have?
[20:16] Are you communicating your needs properly?
[21:02] Are you using punishments to control or manipulate your partner?
[21:37] Are you truly looking for you both to shine your brightest?
[21:47] Are you holding onto a victim mindset?
[22:02] Are you ready to let you both shine in your unique and individual ways?
[22:37] There's no such thing as a win-lose in relationships. If one loses, you both lose.
Ultimately how we partner is how we parent. We should do everything we can to be peaceful partners, because it will translate into our parenting and make a big difference in all of our relationships.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Check out our latest training, Worth The Fight.
I know there can be a lot of anxiety and indecision when it comes to the topic of school vs. homeschool. How do you know which way to go? What if I try it and it doesn’t work? What if I ruin my kids??
In this episode I’m going to walk you through the decision making process and take you from indecision to clarity.
[10:42] “The best use of imagination is creativity. The worst use of imagination is anxiety.” Deepak Chopra
[11:58] 1. Our role is to choose the environment in which our children educate themselves.
[14:04] 2. Our choices aren't right for everyone. They're only right for our own families.
[16:27] 3. Nothing is set in stone. We can make changes if something doesn't feel right.
[18:40] Use this matrix & process to help you make a decision.
[20:31] Education
[22:13] Time
[23:31] Cost
[24:39] Reliability
[26:16] Method
[28:01] Socialization
[31:50] Autonomy
[33:22] Health
[34:17] Relationships
[35:58] Intuition
[36:45] Add in any additional considerations for your unique situation.
[41:02] If you're going to homeschool, work on mindset before you go out and buy all the awesome stuff.
[42:12] Learning can only be effective when you and your child feel good about it.
Q&A:
[49:29] I want to homeschool, but my spouse thinks I'll ruin our kids.
[51:47] How old were your (Avital's) kids when you started using your Focus Time approach?
[53:03] What is a "hybrid model"?
[54:25] How do I homeschool a preschooler and still work 8 hours from home?
[56:07] What homeschool system do you recommend for non-English speakers?
[56:43] My spouse thinks socialization will suffer if we homeschool.
[58:22] I'm not a structured person and already struggle with routines...I fear it may be a little too much.
[59:55] What time are the Q&A sessions if I join Focus Time?
[49:29] I want to homeschool, but my spouse thinks I'll ruin our kids.
[51:47] How old were your (Avital's) kids when you started using your Focus Time approach?
[53:03] What is a "hybrid model"?
[54:25] How do I homeschool a preschooler and still work 8 hours from home?
[56:07] What homeschool system do you recommend for non-English speakers?
[56:43] My spouse thinks socialization will suffer if we homeschool.
[58:22] I'm not a structured person and already struggle with routines...I fear it may be a little too much.
[59:55] What time are the Q&A sessions if I join Focus Time?
[1:01:02] What age should we start? I think my kids are too little.
[1:02:20] Do I need to homeschool, or is unschooling an option?
[1:03:30] Does homeschooling work between divorced parents?
[1:04:33] Would Focus Time help me decide if homeschooling is for me?
[1:05:13] How do you handle "demand avoidance"?
[1:08:06] My Mom is an elementary school teacher and talks about homeschoolers always being behind when they start school.
If you’re still unsure or are homeschool-curious, check out our course Focus Time. It will help you gain clarity and take a peek behind the curtain to see what it’s like to homeschool.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Go here to get a pdf copy of the decision matrix.
- Join our course, Focus Time
- Need help convincing your spouse? Check out my free ebook 10 Zen Secrets Of Persuasion.
So many of us have been pushing through, waiting and hoping for things to return to some sort of “normal”. But with a second wave sweeping through the world it seems like it may never get back to normal. And now with the school year approaching and continued restrictions wherever we go, there’s no end to the opportunities to feel anxious, fearful, and overwhelmed.
In this episode I want to help you recommit, reenergize, and reinvigorate yourself, bolstering your resolve with 3 simple mindset shifts.
[05:58] If you're feeling frustrated, cooped up, judged, irritated, etc., you're not alone.
[08:13] How can we view everything through a more compassionate lens?
[09:21] I believe there's a better way to handle differences of opinion.
[17:11] Mindset #1: The benefit of the doubt.
[22:03] Mindset #2: Believe in yourself
[26:51] Mindset #3: Be the you that you want to be.
Rather than approaching things with anxiety, judgement, shame, and guilt, we can use these mindsets to come at things with love, grace, compassion, integrity, and make a positive impact on the world. Let's be the people who increase calmness, peace, and reason. People who promote a sense of togetherness instead of tearing us apart.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Not sure if you should let your kids go back to school? Thinking about homeschooling? Attend my free workshop to help you gain clarity on what’s best for you and your family!
- Want to homeschool, but feel overwhelmed? My course Focus Time will help!
Does social media stress you out? Research indicates that it can cause anxiety and even depression. I’ve heard countless people say they felt great after taking a break from it. Why is that?
In this episode I want to offer a breakdown of the recent social media landscape; how it may be harming us, what we can do to keep our sanity.
[04:56] Links between social media and anxiety and depression.
[10:37] Social media seems to be getting darker and the cons are beginning to outweigh the pros.
[14:23] A large part of it stems from anonymity, and losing face-to-face interactions.
[18:49] There's a major lack of accountability.
[22:52] There's a lack of discourse and an inflation of terminology.
[24:22] The main factor contributing to anxiety is catastrophizing.
[25:30] We're also losing our individuality.
[26:28] There's a major lack of diversity of thought.
[35:38] It's brought back public shaming (which we did away with in the 1800's)
[36:33] Can we start interacting online like we do with people offline?
[40:50] Social media is heavily influencing us and ultimately enslaving us.
Social media is a tool, and all tools can be used for good or evil. It can be a tool that unites us, helps us keep up with friends and family and develop bonds and connections with people we otherwise wouldn’t have the pleasure of meeting.
But it can also be a major source of anxiety and depression, and can derail the relationships with people in our “real life”. So let’s re-evaluate our social media habits and make changes where necessary.
If we can start giving people the benefit of the doubt and treat each other with respect and dignity (like we would if we were interacting in person), we may see a shift in our interactions online.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Join me in a conversation with my friend Kate Northrup, "Do Less" author, as we talk about time-management, work-life balance, and vulnerability.
Sometimes we feel we have to hide some part of our parenting because we're afraid of people's judgments. We fear sharing our whole, vulnerable self because disagreement is often met with hostile, dogmatic, judgmental comments.
One of the things I’ve worked hard to cultivate is friendships with others where it is ok, desired even, to say your honest (respectful!) opinions. And I think this conversation about vaccinations with Kate exemplifies that type of supportive friendship.
[03:18] How entrepreneurship and parenthood converge.
[04:34] The origin of "Do Less".
[09:02] We have to advocate for ourselves to get our needs met.
[12:41] Let’s give our children "trust to show up for themselves".
[15:17] “Less preparation, more presence” -Adrienne Maree Brown
[17:21] Do less, so that what we do is high quality.
[19:48] Avoid "keeping score" and tallying the hours spent being mom, working, etc.
[21:47] Looking outside of ourselves for what we "should" be doing can be dangerous.
[25:44] Let's talk about vaccinations...
[32:16] How Kate handled pushback on her vaccine stance.
[38:36] We shouldn't have to walk on eggshells or be afraid of saying the "wrong thing".
[42:42] You can't "go there" with everyone, but often if we take the lead and try, we'll be pleasantly surprised.
[43:22] How Kate "does it all".
[52:35] Stop beating yourself up!
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Kate’s book Money, A Love Story
- Kate’s book Do Less
- Emergent Strategy by Adrienne Maree Brown
- Kate’s website
- Find Kate on Instagram @katenorthrup
Do you feel tired or burned out in your parenting? Do you feel like you’re “on” all the time and never get a break? Do you think your child’s happiness and entertainment falls squarely on your shoulders? In this episode I want to address an issue I see a lot; overparenting.
[03:01] What is overparenting?
[07:24] A big indicator of overparenting: Burnout
[08:08] Overparenting is not good for the parents
[10:45] Don't take on other people's roles
[12:34] Overparenting is not good for children.
[15:34] Overparenting makes children weak, timid, and fragile.
[16:53] It's not your job to keep your children happy.
[20:09] It's not your job to constantly entertain your children.
[24:00] Get comfortable with discomfort.
If you find yourself in the overparenting camp, start sitting back a little more. Let some of those things go, and stop taking on roles you weren’t meant to take on.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
There’s a mindset that has permeated our culture and it’s causing a lot of damage. It ruins our homes and families, our relationships, and even entire communities. Which mindset? Blaming. Let’s discuss.
[03:32] The blaming mindset is rampant in our culture.
[08:41] How does blaming help?
[09:49] How a blaming mindset affects our homes.
[10:29] Blame triggers defensiveness.
[11:53] Blaming over-simplifies a problem.
[14:13] Blame makes people deflect.
[16:34] Instead, let's develop a solution mindset.
[20:19] Say “We don't blame in this family.”
[21:17] Empathize
When we empathize with people and focus on finding solutions together, we’ll find that there’s opportunity for growth and learning, and it’ll strengthen relationships instead of tear them apart.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Need help figuring out how to homeschool? Take all the guesswork and trial and error out with our homeschooling course, Focus Time.
Many people have been struggling with feelings of powerlessness and negativity. But what if I told you that you possess the ability to empower yourself and create positivity in your life? That’s exactly what I’ll be discussing in this episode.
[03:50] Our thoughts and words are powerful.
[06:48] Culture has "watered down" certain words and concepts.
[10:54] When we use exaggerated words, it sets us up for failure.
[13:28] It's making us fragile.
[18:41] Let's disempower our negative experiences.
[21:42] Challenges make us stronger, not weaker.
[23:10] Let's be more discerning and selective with the words we're using.
[24:09] We can choose how to interpret our challenges and circumstances.
Let’s reflect on the words we’ve been using lately. Are they exaggerations? If so, they’re weakening us and holding us back. Let’s commit to flipping that script and interpreting things in a way that strengthens us and finds the good in our lives.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Book “The Coddling of the American Mind”
We all want to be better communicators, right? I know I do. Like most things in life, improving our communication is a process and it takes intentional work to help us break old habits and create new ones. Join me as I discuss some specific toxic patterns that we all need to break and what we can do instead.
[04:13] Communication skills are so important to be a healthy adult.
[06:14] We often fall into old habits and patterns. To change that we have to work on learning new skills and break the old patterns...
[08:56] Interrupting
[10:38] “Shoulding” over everyone.
[11:36] Generalizing (always, never, etc).
[12:42] Yelling
[14:29] Threats and ultimatums.
[16:40] Pointing & physical intimidation.
[18:48] Criticizing & name calling
[19:46] Shaming
[20:51] Stonewalling
If you start working on these areas and push past the awkward early stages, you WILL see progress in your relationships. Don’t give up!
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Develop 10 powerful tools of communicating artfully with your partner with this free ebook.
There’s a mindset that keeps parents stuck and suffering, and really holds us back. We have a lot more control in our lives than we sometimes believe, and it can take some gentle nudging (or tough love, for some of us) to help us see things for what they are.
Changing our mindset in this one area can make a big difference in our lives and empower us as parents and leaders of our family.
[04:20] We often CAN do the things we say we can't do...we've really just chosen NOT to do them.
[09:29] Saying "I can't" breeds desperation, anxiety, and depression.
[11:05] We have nearly endless choices over the majority of things in our lives (80%).
[12:58] Why do we choose not to? Sometimes we just don't want to.
[14:10] Sometimes we aren't willing to pay the price.
[16:40] Sometimes it's just not a priority for us.
[17:08] We need to take ownership of our choices.
[19:04] Reframing our choices is empowering and can help us through difficult circumstances.
So instead of saying “I can’t”, which is true only 20% of the time, own your choice: Say you don’t want to, you aren’t willing to pay the price, or you’re prioritizing other things. Then when you need to, remind yourself of the choices you’re making, and why you’re making them.
Need help setting up your family for homeschooling success? Check out our course, Focus Time.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Because sending kids to school is often the “default option”, I’m often asked “Why do you homeschool?”
I think it’s time to start reversing that question and ask “why are you sending your kids to school?” When you really think about what your school provides (or doesn’t provide), homeschooling may begin to look much more appealing and not as out-of-reach as you once thought.
Let’s discuss.
[05:19] Why do I homeschool?
[08:00] Schools are a service, and we can decide if that service is right for us.
[08:50] Service 1: Babysitting
[09:29] Service 2: Education
[12:08] Service 3: Socialization & community
[14:11] With how much is at stake, the real question should be "why send your child to school?"
[16:06] You don't have to be a trained educator to homeschool.
[18:01] There are other options if babysitting is the main reason you send your kids to school.
[20:00] Many schools push rote memorization, which isn't effective.
[20:32] We can help our kids develop skills they might otherwise learn in school.
[21:01] There are ways to help homeschoolers make friends and build community with others.
[22:41] Schools often use extrinsic motivation, which isn't effective.
[23:44] They learn to compete instead of collaborate in schools.
[25:11] It may require certain sacrifices and lifestyle choices, but it's so worth it.
[26:41] It may not be for everyone, but if you want to do it, you can!
If school really is the best option for you and your family, great! But I want you to at least work through these questions and justify why you’re sending them to school. Let’s do what’s best for our children and family, even if it means going against the default.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Check out our new course, Focus Time
Even without a global pandemic, life can be hard. Bad things happen and we all experience difficulties and challenges. It’s easy to feel sorry for ourselves and go through life as a victim. But I’m here to tell you that there’s so much more waiting for you on the other side of victimhood, and you can decide to leave it behind. Let’s discuss how.
[04:07] Society pressures us to sacrifice everything on the altar of parenthood.
[05:36] Feeling your feelings is step 1, and victims get stuck here.
[08:01] It's ok to feel that way. But do you really want to stay there?
[10:31] Humans have the ability to overcome the craziest challenges and hardships, and can come through it stronger.
[12:49] Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional.
[15:12] If you want to stop feeling like a victim, you have to stop seeing yourself as a victim.
[17:32] Not all stress is bad.
[18:37] We need to mind our own business and focus on things we can control.
[20:36] We need to take control of our thoughts.
[23:32] We have power over our words.
[30:13] Double down on what we can control.
[32:40] Present Play is an amazing resource to help overcome a victim mentality. Join before the doors close for another year!
The choice is ours! We can stay in the suffering and live life as a victim, or decide enough is enough and leave it behind. So much of it is within our control. We are not powerless. We’ll find that these simple changes will have a major compounding effect if we continually reframe our situation and choose to stop seeing ourselves as a victim.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
Join Present Play before the doors close on May 1st!
I get messages from parents all over the world (hundreds a day) asking how they can get their kids to play independently.
I hear things like:
- My kids won’t play
- My kids are clingy
- We live in a small apartment
- My kids have very different play styles
- My kids fight with each other
- I’m a working parent, so it can’t work for me
I’m here to tell you that those are just excuses! And to help you see that your kids are capable of independent play, I wanted to share some stories from a few of my “Present Players”.
[01:14] No matter how out of control life may feel, there are always things we can control.
[06:10] Independent play is a skill that can be developed
[07:56] Independent play has incredible benefits for our children.
[08:55] You don't need to buy anything. You'll likely even get rid of some things.
[11:17] Hear how Elizabeth learned to prioritize play, and accommodate 2 very different styles of play for her children.
[12:46] “Strewing changed my life...It's like magic.”
[15:34] She found that each of her kids have different play needs, and does what she can to encourage and protect that.
[16:18] Hear Galina's story about how she set up her zones in a tiny New York apartment.
[17:18] Overwhelmed in her small apartment with too many toys.
[18:48] Even though she has a small apartment, she has found a way to set up all of her play zones.
[21:07] “I wasn't sure if my child could play independently because he was clingy.”
[23:59] Don't let excuses get in the way! If Galina can make it work, you can make it work too!
[25:11] Melissa didn't know how to organize life in the midst of chaos.
[26:01] You don't have to do everything at once
[26:10] Make sure the structure of the space makes sense for the intent of the space.
[26:31] Even in quarantine (with 6 people in a 3 bedroom house), she was able to set up a space for school work without affecting her existing play spaces.
[27:18] It eased the transition to homeschooling
[29:06] Hear Victoria's story, and how she's able to "parent from work" and direct her son's play, even when she can't be home with him.
[30:40] You can set up your home with small changes, using things you already own.
[31:18] Is it relevant for a 10 month old? Yes, and he's morphed into an independent play toddler.
[31:35] Has allowed her to set up her caretakers (and son) for success by strewing and designing his play areas.
Whether you have lots of space and access to the outdoors or you live in a small apartment with no outside space, you can design your home in a way that encourages independent play. Whether you’re a full-time caretaker or work full-time, Present Play will help you set your kids up for [independent play] success.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Join the “Love Parenting with Avital” Facebook group!
- Check out the Play Guru module for free before it closes!
- Join the challenge!
I know that these times have been tough for many, leaving some in a “survival mode.” But others have found, in spite of the challenges and frustrations, that they’re enjoying certain aspects of their time at home with their family.
And it may leave us wondering...do we really want life to go back to the way it was before? Or is it time to make some changes to the way we live our lives? Let’s discuss.
[03:19] Let's choose to find the good in a bad situation.
[05:40] Amidst the hardship and trials, you might find yourself enjoying it.
[08:23] We may find things about our lives that we want to change going forward.
[14:26] What I learned living through terrorist attacks in Jerusalem.
[17:16] It's so easy to focus on only the bad things when you're in a crisis.
[17:46] There are always gifts to be had, even during tragedy and crisis.
[20:13] Challenges we face can give us perspective and remind us of what's truly important.
[20:59] We need to create the reality we want and lead our families.
Let’s not let this opportunity go to waste. Let’s assess our lives and start crafting the reality we WANT to live, and not just go back to life as it was before.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Join the challenge!
At times in life (and for many, the present time), we’ll face challenges and changes in our resources. To stay sane (or sometimes just survive), it’s necessary to adjust your expectations to what’s realistic given your circumstances.
[08:53] We can choose whether or not to be a victim.
[10:29] We have to match our level of expectations to the level of our resources.
[11:17] When you lose resources, there's a transition period where you may be edgy and frustrated. Give yourself grace!
[12:11] If you're measuring against old expectations, you'll feel like a failure. It's time to adjust your expectations.
[13:34] Resources can be time, money, etc., but we must also consider physical, mental, and emotional resources.
[14:43] Assess how your resources have changed.
[15:43] In areas where there's a depletion of resources, there MUST be a depletion of expectations.
[16:49] We must be adaptable, and flexible...even in our parenting styles.
[17:58] If you're feeling overwhelmed, just focus on the next thing.
[19:07] Celebrate every win, no matter how small.
It’s liberating when your expectations are adjusted to reality. You can focus on what’s next, give yourself some breathing room (and grace), and look for the good in the situation we’ve been handed.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Join the challenge!
Renee Jain is back for another episode! With so many parents finding themselves homeschooling, we thought we should offer some practical tips to help parents through this challenging transition and help you (and your kids) stay sane!
[02:50] Cut yourself some slack. It's not realistic to think you'll be a homeschooling pro in a couple of weeks.
[03:05] Kids go through a "de-schooling" process; expect it to be rocky.
[05:41] Be realistic about the amount of time it takes to figure out a flow that works for your family.
[07:33] Some routine and rhythm is helpful. Try focusing on 3 "big rocks"
[12:11] What is our role in all of this?
[13:37] The highest priority is to preserve an energy for connection and family joy.
[15:31] Trying to recreate a school experience at home is a complete waste of energy and causes disconnection between us and our children.
[17:31] Let's not put academic pressure on our children during this time. They'll be able to make up for whatever was "lost".
[19:15] So what should they be doing? Play.
[19:56] This is an opportunity to show us just how capable our children are of entertaining themselves.
[22:54] Play is crucial for our children's development.
[24:24] Become a play guru!
[25:59] We can have certain rules around a few things, but for the most part, let your children be.
[27:43] We can help our children get into a state of "flow" in their play (which I call free play).
[29:44] When you're in "flow", you're not directed or rewarded by someone else. The activity is the reward.
[30:03] Don't interrupt their flow! Let them be.
[31:54] This also teaches them responsibility for using their time well.
[33:36] Experiment with strewing!
[35:52] Boredom is a choice. If they're bored, put it back on them. Help them in age appropriate ways, but let them figure it out.
[37:22] There's a difference between encouraging independent play and being disconnected.
[38:00] Give your full attention during care-giving activities, but otherwise, give them some space.
[41:14] Homeschooling doesn't require you to be constantly present all day long.
[45:50] Thinking you have to entertain your children all day long will lead to resentment.
[46:39] Hold the boundary and they'll adjust and get over it.
[48:22] Set limits to protect the relationship.
[49:33] How to stay organized when strewing.
[50:26] Don't take it personally if they aren't into a strew idea. Some will land, and some will not.
It’ll take a little time to “de-school” and figure out a new normal. Focus on helping your children play and get into “flow” and don’t worry about their academics. It may not happen overnight, but you’ll see change quicker than you think.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Play Guru Course (free for a limited time)
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/59
As we face the COVID-19 Pandemic, there’s a lot we can’t control. It can cause major fear, anxiety, and worry...but it doesn’t have to. This episode is from a live video I did where I shared 3 questions you can ask when you’re facing a crisis, and I wanted to share it with you in hopes it will help you through these uncertain times.
[02:49] Question 1: Who do I want to be?
[06:53] It may not come naturally...you'll likely have to work to be the person you want to be.
[07:16] I try to imagine what my older and wiser self would say about the situation.
[09:48] You can be doing the right "whats", but the "how" will make a big difference in your experience.
[10:55] Question 2: How can I help? What can I [practically] do?
[13:22] Our kids are looking to us to learn how to handle crises.
[16:09] If you're not on the front lines, focus on what you can actually do. Spend your energy there.
[21:02] Question 3: Look for the blessings in your situation.
[26:59] Challenges make us stronger...if we let them.
We don’t have control of this situation. And to a large extent we can’t control how it develops and how it changes life as we know it. But we can control our perspective and how we respond. The choice is ours.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to Instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on Instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Lawrence Cohen’s book The Opposite Of Worry.
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/58
Hi friend! Do your kids ever get angry or throw tantrums? Do YOU ever get triggered by their tantrums and lose it?
🙋🏻♀️I do. We all do.
In this episode you’ll get to hear from the amazing Renee Jain of GoZen as we discuss how to “handle” emotions in both our children AND in ourselves.
[05:37] What is GoZen in a nutshell?
[09:20] We have to make peace with the idea that stress and difficulties are a part of our humanity.
[09:42] Feelings aren't good or bad. They're neutral.
[11:24] Create a character (a name) for each emotion (such as “Fury” for anger).
[14:30] Emotions come and go. They're not permanent.
[14:44] We need to have a relationship with the [seemingly negative] emotion and see the upsides.
[19:23] Anger/fury usually pops up for protection, or when boundaries have been crossed.
[22:10] Don't try to teach your children things "in the moment."
[22:48] We need to model what it looks like and stop trying to control our children’s emotions.
[27:28] In those moments, try putting on your detective hat.
[31:24] Play is so important, even when they're throwing angry tantrums.
[32:51] Progress should be measured in years, not days.
[34:44] Practice or role play (outside of the moment) to teach them how they can respond differently when they're in the moment.
[41:21] It's a marathon, not a sprint.
[44:52] We can't be afraid of feelings and try to always suppress and control them.
[48:26] Get a stuffed animal for each of the 4 main emotions and use them for role play.
The work never really ends, but if we’ll remember that progress is measured in years and not days, that it’s a marathon and not a sprint, and implement some of the tips that Renee mentions, we’ll start to see some lasting change in ourselves and in our children.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Go Zen's Website
- Go Zen’s Masterclass
- Dear Anxiety Podcast
- Episode Show Notes
So many of us want to improve our relationship with our partner. The love, romance, and fun we once had evaporated when kids came along, and we’re left scratching our heads, wondering if we made a mistake or if we can ever get that back. I’m here to tell you that it’s possible! And that it’s normal to go through these seasons of challenges in a relationship.
In this episode I’m going to give you the blueprint from my Parent In Love course and give you some actionable steps you can take to make changes in your partnership, even if you don’t sign up for my course.
[03:54] Why is it so hard to make your vision or dream for your relationship a reality?
[06:30] Why I talk about improving our relationships.
[12:26] It only takes one person to make significant changes in your relationship.
[13:34] Step 1: Mindset
[17:00] If you have any thoughts about leaving, that needs to be addressed first.
[18:18] Step 2: Communication
[23:52] Step 3: Teamwork
[30:13] Step 4: Vision
[31:56] Learn how our own childhood and past experiences influence our partnership and parenting.
[34:48] Make time for some deep conversations.
[35:34] Step 5: Connection
[40:45] Step 6: Leadership (how we parent together)
If we don’t put some time and effort into changing ourselves, our partnership won’t change. Sure, our partners have things to work on...but so do we. And if we work on ourselves and how we react and respond, we’ll start to see changes in how our partner reacts and responds too. It only takes one person to make big changes in a partnership.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Unleash Your Inner Power Couple Workshop
- 10 Zen Secrets Of Persuasion eBook
- Video about reconnecting with your partner
- Parent In Love Course
In this episode I’m going to give you a framework that you can use to create anything you want in your marriage, family, and life.
[02:52] You can create family bliss
[02:59] We want people to move from just consuming our content to creating.
[05:31] What do we mean by "create"?
[06:11] Commit
[09:39] Reframe
[12:03] Educate
[13:58] Action
[15:54] Trust
[17:22] Envision
It’s a cycle...when you commit to making changes, reframe your circumstances, educate yourself, take action, trust the process, and envision what life could be, it fuels the process and creates more energy to continuously propels you through C.R.E.A.T.E process.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/55
Mindset is so important when it comes to growth, challenges, and the daily "grind." In this episode I want to share a mindset shift that we can use to reframe the work it takes to create great relationships. And it comes from a surprising source...Michelangelo.
[03:21] Our shortcomings can leave us feeling broken, overwhelmed, and frustrated.
[05:55] Sometimes we look to others to model what we should do, and over-work ourselves trying to fit someone else's mold.
[10:27] Move toward a model that feels more organic and whole.
[11:47] There's a "power couple" inside of you and your partner.
[13:49] We are “figures slumbering in the stone.”
[14:34] Focus on chipping away at those things that don't serve us.
[16:53] You're the sculptor. No one else can do it for you.
[18:16] It’s more helpful to focus on what you need to take away vs. what you need to add.
[22:10] Chip away at our “low vibe mindsets.”
[23:52] Chip away at our toxic patterns and behaviors.
[25:25] Chip away at our misaligned choices
When we start to chip away at these areas, we start to reveal our inner power couple. You’ll find that if you focus more on removing what doesn’t serve you, your relationships will transform and you’ll see real, lasting change.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Get my new [free] eBook, The Ten Zen Secrets Of Persuasion.
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/54
When it comes to your relationship with your partner, do you ever feel like you're just managing? Like you’re just roommates? You may even feel downright miserable.
If you’ve ever experienced disappointment, frustration, unmet expectations, loss of passion, mediocrity, or misery, you’re not alone! Many people have experienced this, including myself.
In this episode we’ll discuss how ignorance and the desire to maintain the status quo may be holding you back from your dream relationship.
[05:17] Why I talk about partnering & relationships.
[06:07] Is ignorance really bliss?
[08:36] Staying ignorant keeps us stuck in place, stuck in the status quo, and holds us back from our hopes and dreams.
[12:34] Ending the relationship is not your only option.
[14:15] Feeling like there's something missing and wanting more isn't wrong and doesn't mean you're broken.
[17:52] You can't force someone else to change. The answer is to roll up our sleeves, get to work, and create the bliss we desire.
[21:45] Either way you're expending energy...you might as well put it into activities that will improve your relationship!
Redirect the energy you’re putting into staying unhappy to things that will move you forward. You’ll soon notice a difference and will build momentum in the right direction.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- My new eBook, The Ten Zen Secrets Of Persuasion.
- Live Webinar Feb 3 (or catch the replay)
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/53
How would you rate your relationship with your partner? Is it everything you dreamed of having? Or are you planning your escape?
Whether you’re miserable or fairly satisfied with your partnership, I’m here to tell you that it’s possible to have the relationship you’ve always wanted, EVEN if you’re ready to throw in the towel.
In this episode we’re going to discuss the 5 rungs of the “Partnership Ladder”, how you can assess where you’re at in 3 key areas of your relationship, and the mindset shift that needs to occur in order to climb the ladder.
[05:16] Divorce/breaking up can often be avoided with intentional work on our part.
[08:07] Let's switch from a fixed mindset to a growth mindset regarding our relationship.
[13:29] Key area number 1: Teamwork.
[15:11] Key area number 2: Parenting styles.
[16:56] Key area number 3: Connection.
[18:09] The 5-step “Partnership Ladder.”
[18:50] Rung 1: It's miserable.
[21:28] Rung 2: It's stressful.
[22:21] Rung 3: It's manageable.
[24:49] Rung 4: It's satisfying.
[26:22] Rung 5: It's blissful.
[32:54] The places where we have the least amount of energy and capacity are often the places that need it most.
[33:26] Our partnership influences every other area of our lives (for better or worse).
[36:53] Life isn't a fairytale. It won't end happily ever after by chance. It's takes work! But it is possible.
It’s important to assess where we are in each key area, and commit to getting to the next rung in at least 1 key area. If you adopt a growth mindset and put in the work, you’ll be well on your way to having the relationship you’ve always wanted!
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- My new eBook, The Ten Zen Secrets Of Persuasion.
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/52
Would you like to know one thing you can do today to radically change your relationship with your partner?
Do you want to take your relationship to the next level? Instead of just treating symptoms and avoiding pain, can you work on improving your relationship into “peak performance” and make it the best it can be? And is it worth that level of effort?
Yes and yes!
In this episode we’ll discuss how we hold the power to make this kind of change in our relationships, and the choice is ours.
[06:46] What I learned from HypnoBirthing (and how it can improve our relationships).
[11:39] We get to choose the story we tell ourselves, good or bad.
[15:54] This is a key way to create power in our relationships
[17:01] What words are you currently using to describe your partner?
[18:09] Speaking poorly of others is very damaging.
[19:16] Before we speak, ask ourselves these questions.
[20:07] The power of not gossiping.
[21:35] If you wouldn’t say it to their face, don’t say it behind their back.
[24:36] Drop the negative labels and words we use for our partner and relationship.
[25:57] Use "I" statements.
[27:09] Refrain from using hyperboles (exaggerations).
We hold the power. We can choose to flip the switch, to focus on the positive instead of the negative. We can change the words we speak over our relationships, and in the process, change those relationships. The choice is ours!
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Our course Parent In Love
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/51
We’ve all inherited a blueprint for relationships from our parents, whether we’ve acknowledged it or not. And unless we examine it further, we’re destined to have the same relationship as our parents.
Some of us may have been blessed with a great model for how to properly treat others, communicate, and resolve conflicts. But many were not so blessed, and even if you were, there are likely things about your parent’s relationship that you would do differently.
In this episode we’re going to discuss the process of examining our parent’s relationship and how we can create the relationship and family we’ve always wanted (plus set up our kids for relational success!).
[02:52] Ask yourself: Do I want my parent's relationship?
[04:48] Our parent's relationship formed a sub-conscious blueprint for our own relationships.
[07:07] If we don't address it, we're likely to repeat it.
[08:35] Or we reject it completely and try to do the exact opposite.
[11:08] Our kids learn how to interact with others from the way they see us interact with our partner.
[15:26] Pick the best from our parent's marriage, and find alternatives for the rest.
[17:57] Look at your parent's marriage with an external, objective viewpoint.
[19:46] Envision the relationship and family you want to create.
[22:27] Develop the skills necessary to make our dream a reality and start making small changes to our thoughts, words, and actions.
We owe it to ourselves and our children (and their children!) to put in the work to create the marriage and family of our dreams. There will be a cascading effect that will change generations.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources:
- Our course, Parent In Love
- Episode 14 (You are your kid’s curriculum)
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/50
Do you or have you ever felt stuck in your marriage or serious relationship? Are you caught up in the day-to-day activities, wondering where the passion and excitement went? If so, you’re not alone. But it doesn’t have to stay that way! It’s up to us to choose what we want and make it happen.
[02:32] So many marriages and relationships around us are failing.
[03:57] Even those that don't end in divorce seem to be full of conflict or complacency.
[05:38] If you're feeling stuck or stagnant in your relationship, you're not alone. And there's something you can do about it.
[06:53] Most of our relationships are limited only by our imagination.
[08:31] Some conflict is natural and expected. But how we handle it makes all the difference.
[09:26] When you argue for your limits, you get to keep them.
[10:04] You cannot solve a problem from the same level at which it was created.
[10:40] Don't fall into the Disney Princess trap. Wake up!
[12:12] We get to create the relationship and family that we want.
[14:24] Don't let resistance or limiting beliefs prevent you from creating the relationship of your dreams.
[17:30] Our marriage could become the greatest source of healing and meaning in our lives.
It takes a lot of effort...but we've already put in tremendous effort to organize as a family. Why not put in the next level of effort and make it great?
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/49
Should you tell your kids the truth about Santa or the tooth fairy? How about the “Elf On The Shelf”? I get asked questions about these and other traditions on a regular basis, and I thought I would round up some of my favorite conversations regarding these in this special holiday episode.
[3:03] Some TPJ updates!
[11:06] Should we tell our kids the truth about Santa?
[11:59] I feel strongly that everything I tell my kids should be 100% the truth.
[13:18] You don't have to bring it up, but if they ask, be honest.
[13:41] Soon your kids may ask you about serious matters, and they should not have any doubt that you're being honest with them.
[15:08] Don't avoid the game or ritual; but consider being 100% honest about it if your children ask if it's real.
[16:58] My thoughts on the “Elf On The Shelf” tradition.
[19:27] When children melt down, it's because there's an unmet need or our expectation isn't developmentally appropriate.
[22:44] Our role isn't to manipulate our children into good behavior.
[23:30] This actually teaches them to only behave when they're being watched, and doesn’t teach them empathy.
[27:03] How you can make it fun without the manipulation.
[29:56] A letter to our families.
[30:02] We may not like or approve of everything our family does, and they may not agree with the way we do things (or don't do things).
[30:40] Let's reframe; they often do the things they do or say the things they say because they care about us!
[31:02] Let's try to model what it looks like to be loving and accepting, even when people disagree with us.
[31:28] We shouldn't let little annoyances come between us and the people we love (and who love us).
[31:55] Let's focus on the gift of spending time together.
When you approach these issues with the mindset of a conscious and peaceful parent, you’ll find ways to enjoy the holidays and their traditions without the sometimes negative and harmful effects they may otherwise bring.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Links & resources mentioned:
- Should You Tell the TRUTH about Santa?
- STOP! Elf on a Shelf
- Dear Family, A Letter For The Holidays
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/48
In this episode you’ll get to listen in on a conversation I had with Rachel Rainbolt from Sage Parenting. Rachel is a coach, writer, podcaster, and advocate of all things gentle parenting, natural homeschooling, and simple living.
We know you’ll get a lot out of this conversation with two mommas who don’t always get it right, who sometimes lose their cools or get overwhelmed, but always try to do what’s best for their ever-changing children and families.
[4:13] Find the overlap between your child’s needs and your concerns and collaborate with them to find a solution that addresses both.
[5:02] Example of overlap.
[6:30] “It feels really great to treat children like actual human beings, deserving of respect, and honoring our own needs and feelings in the process.”
[6:59] Some mistakenly believe this only works for older kids.
[8:18] Sometimes we have unrealistic expectations or have this “template” we try to use. We need to keep our expectations aligned with each unique, individual child.
[10:48] Have grace for yourself...we're not all born as great parents. It takes effort and work.
[11:23] Narrate out loud what's going through your head.
[11:36] We all lose it sometimes. Model what it looks like to ask forgiveness and make repairs.
[13:55] Get yourself out of that fight, flight, or freeze response so you can think and respond instead of reacting.
[14:48] Rachel’s approach to homeschooling.
[16:17] Started out in public school, but it didn't feel right.
[18:27] This is how children naturally learn and develop.
[22:16] When you hold space for your child's preferences & desires, they'll do the same for you.
[25:09] Some parents need a little more structure around their child's education, and that's ok. Find a balance.
[26:52] Relax on the timelines of what they're supposed to learn. don't need to push things so early.
[31:30] Rachel’s approach with screens at home.
[32:52] Don't fear technology. Screens are like a tool or part of the environment.
[37:38] We're all unique, and you have to do what works best for your family.
[40:59] What is the bucket system?
[45:02] Rachel’s approach to minimalism and simple living.
[45:32] We all need to simplify our lives to give us space to work on the things that are most meaningful.
[47:28] Involve your children in conversations about finances.
[50:13] You can bring your kids into money conversations without adding the burdensome or stressful elements of your financial situation.
[53:39] Many necessary life skills aren't learned in school.
[58:17] Keep a list of things that each child wants. As holidays or birthdays approach, revisit the list and ask if there’s anything they no longer want.
[58:43] Give things away to other families/children and allow your children to see the positive effect it has on that family.
If you make it a priority to discover and honor your child's preferences & desires, you’ll find that they'll do the same for you and it will completely change the dynamics of your family!
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Links & resources mentioned:
- Rachel’s website, Sage Parenting
- @SageParenting on IG
- Free to Learn by Peter Gray
- The Opposite Of Spoiled by Ron Lieber
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/47
The holidays are often a mixed bag of emotions. It can be a privilege to have family and friends to meet up with during the holidays. But for many of us it’s a season of stress and frustration...especially when you do things differently from the norm, like peaceful & conscious parenting.
[4:34] The stress and anxiety can become “normal” for us if we don’t do something about it.
[6:50] We shouldn't let differences and minor issues damage our relationships.
[9:58] Tip #1: Your breath.
[13:38] Tip #2: Visualization.
[17:40] Tip #3: Focus on the good, not the bad. “Energy flows where attention goes.” -Tony Robbins
[22:53] Remember this season is temporary!
[23:51] You are the main leader and influence in your children’s life.
[24:56] Being with diverse groups of people will broaden their horizons and capacity!
[25:58] Take breaks.
[27:55] Channel your inner “peaceful ninja”.
We can’t avoid some of the more unpleasant aspects of gathering with family over the holiday season, but we can use these tools to reduce the stress and anxiety that normally come with this time of year. Let’s use our breath to stay calm, our bubble to keep criticisms or judgments from bothering us, and focus only on the good during this holiday season.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Links & resources mentioned:
- Byron Katie’s book Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life
- Byron Katie’s website, The Work.
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/46
In this special bonus episode of the Parenting Junkie Show, I interview Tosha Schore, whose mission is to create a more peaceful world one sweet boy at a time. Tosha helps parents who have young boys who are struggling with aggression issues, helping change their behavior without using punishment or harshness.
This episode will be helpful even if you don’t have boys. You no doubt have boys in your life in some way (nephews, friends of your kids, etc.) and you’ll learn about what we need to change regarding the way we treat boys in our culture.
[3:46] We have an opportunity to bring more peace to the world by changing how we parent/treat boys.
[11:12] Men often tamp down their boy's feelings to help them avoid the shame they experienced as a child.
[13:08] The way to “fix it” is not by shaming parents or the boys.
[15:32] Parents get scared; men don’t want their boys to be shamed like they were, and women are often triggered by past trauma.
[16:03] First we have to heal ourselves and work on our own triggers.
[17:18] We often believe a fallacy that if they behave “properly,” then they get our love and affection. We need to flip that around.
[22:23] Move in close and try to be playful about it.
[23:39] It's not about teaching them what’s ok and what’s not...they know.
[27:46] Kids often will say or do things that are contrary to what they really want or need.
[30:34] Your body/physical touch is a parenting tool.
[31:55] Setting limits is extremely important for the well-being of you and your family.
[33:52] Limits will shine a light on the area(s) your kid's struggle with.
[37:17] Limits can (and should) be set with love.
[38:25] We often subconsciously expect kids to love the limits we set...but they won’t. You have to get comfortable with the fact that they won’t like it.
[40:33] Why do we do things that don’t work over and over, expecting them to suddenly start working?
[42:53] Being playful and silly is a great way to diffuse tense situations.
[43:28] Once a child feels seen and connected, he wants to cooperate.
[44:57] If you're uncomfortable with aggressive play, step outside your comfort zone and experiment with allowing it.
[51:56] What about aggressive video games?
[53:09] Do what’s best for you and your family (even if “all their friends” play a certain game and you feel uncomfortable with it).
[55:04] Be interested in what your kids are interested in and learn about the games they’re playing.
[55:28] Tech should stay in a family space (i.e. not in a bedroom).
[56:01] If something interferes with their wellbeing, you may need to set limits around that activity. And experiment with limits and adjust as necessary.
[58:50] Behavior doesn't equal identity.
If we consistently step toward our boys when they act up and focus on building connection, we’ll start to see the aggressive behaviors “peel off” (like layers of an onion). Remember, your sweet boy is in there regardless of current behavior
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Links & Resources Mentioned:
- Tosha’s book Listen: Five Simple Tools to Meet Your Everyday Parenting Challenges
- Tosha’s website
- Tosha’s Facebook Page
- Tosha’s course “Out With Aggression”
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/podcast_type/tosha-schore
Do your children ever act entitled or ungrateful? Mine do, and it’s a major trigger for me. While I don’t want to deprive my children of abundance, safety, joy, experiences and some material things, I don’t want to raise entitled and ungrateful children (who will turn into entitled and ungrateful adults)! So what are we to do??
That’s what we’re talking about in today’s episode.
[3:59] How entitled are our kids? We can use these questions as a gauge.
[6:36] If our children are acting entitled, what do we do? Getting angry or yelling makes it worse.
[7:28] Giving in makes it worse too.
[11:02] My aim isn’t to give my kids a fairy tale existence.
[17:24] It’s a gradual learning curve.
[19:48] Entitlement isn’t about having “the thing”; it’s about the attitude toward having “the thing”.
[20:06] The opposite of entitlement isn’t deprivation; the opposite of entitlement is gratitude.
[21:34] Practical step #1 to decreasing our children’s entitlement: Restrain our overprotective instincts.
[24:30] Practical step #2: Help them frame frustrations within a broader perspective.
[26:59] Practical step #3: We should avoid bribing our children or paying them for chores.
[28:29] Practical step #4: Stop doing things for your children that they can do for themselves.
[30:27] Practical step #5: Practice gratitude regularly.
[33:07] Practical step #6: Give our children perspective by sharing how difficult things are/were for other people.
The opposite of entitlement is gratitude, and the route to gratitude is perspective. We need to remind ourselves of how good we have it and stop taking it for granted.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to Instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on Instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Links & resources mentioned:
- Next Bliss Retreat
- Empathic Limits Course
- Amy McCready’s book “The Me, Me, Me Epidemic”
- Peaceful Parenting Doesn't Work?!
- Allowance and Chores
- 10 Tips for Teaching Gratitude
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/45
We all want what’s best for our children, but sometimes we can be a little too protective, do too much for them, and expect too little from them.
In this interview with Becki Biermaier, who has experienced more than her share of challenges as a little person, we discuss what parents can do to help their children develop resilience and overcome the challenges they face in life.
[8:05] Pity is disempowering. “Until a child knows they can’t, they think they can.”
[9:46] Boundaries and expectations.
[11:43] Allow our children to experience discomfort and challenges
[13:46] Celebrate progress instead of complaining that our children need our help to complete a task.
[15:00] “What kids need the most is to do things for themselves, with you telling them they can.”
[16:51] Build margin into our schedule so we can slow down and let our children try things on their own.
[18:09] Help younger children by promoting their independence and helping them learn that every choice has a result.
[21:05] Elementary school age: teach them to brainstorm strategies and think through “if/then” scenarios (and to regroup when they fail or face challenges).
[23:00] Middle schoolers; reinforce the idea that their decisions impact their results.
[23:40] Even though they resist it, middle schoolers need more of your time.
[25:20] High school; they do more on their own and need a safe space to come to you with questions and issues.
[28:15] Overcoming bullying or getting picked on.
[31:02] Overcoming learning or social disabilities and challenges.
[37:18] Partner with your child’s teachers & school administration.
I think we’ll find that as we expect more from our children, build in more time to let them try things on their own, celebrate their wins, and help them regroup after failures, they’ll develop resilience and overcome any challenges that come their way!
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Links & resources mentioned:
- Becki’s email address: everybodylookup@gmail.com
- Becki’s YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCTG10qvgLMRSoB9OIc6xNxA
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/podcast_type/becki-biermaier/
Are your kids ever on the receiving end of name-calling? Do they get their feelings hurt by other kids, and you find yourself struggling with how to deal with it or help them through it?
In this episode we’ll dive into some ways you can help your children become healthy and strong individuals by coaching them through the friction and conflict they’re bound to experience throughout their childhood.
[3:11] Name calling and hurt feelings are par for the course and aren’t as bad as you might think.
[4:54] Our natural tendency is to be empathetic and protective...but sometimes we overprotect.
[6:59] Being overprotective can make our children feel incapable of handling conflict.
[8:04] We also don’t want to just brush it off as no big deal.
[9:40] There will be times when you need to involve other people (parents, teachers, etc.).
[10:41] Not every single conflict between kids is “bullying” or “unsafe.”
[12:47] We need to experience friction & conflict in childhood to help us learn how to deal with it.
[18:22] The 3 “un-truths” explored in The Coddling of the American Mind.
[20:09] Give a little bit of empathy, but mostly focus on coaching them.
[21:52] The untruth of fragility.
[24:09] The untruth of emotional reasoning.
[30:52] The untruth of us vs. them.
Let’s do our best to reframe the conflicts our children experience as opportunities to coach them and help them develop into healthy and strong people who can handle whatever life throws at them.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Links & resources mentioned:
- Book The Coddling of the American Mind
- https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/events/
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/44
Consumption...gifts...toys. If you're like me, you live in a society where materialism and the availability of toys and “stuff” is overwhelming, you likely struggle with the desire for “more” vs. minimalism and mindful consumption.
In this episode we discuss how we can be eco-conscious when it comes to gifts and the holidays.
[3:33] The deck is stacked against us when it comes to consumption and materialism...especially in the U.S.
[6:29] The real issue is with our own internal struggles with mindful consumption.
[6:42] We also need to give ourselves the grace and freedom to live a joy-filled life.
[8:12] The world (and our children) needs less consumption.
[15:29] Idea #1: Adopt an animal from a shelter.
[16:48] Idea #2: An experience.
[18:20] Idea #3: Second hand (used) items.
[19:58] Idea #4: Long lasting/high quality toys.
[21:40] Idea #5: Digital gifts.
In the end what makes the biggest impact is minimizing and making special occasions less about “stuff” and more about what really matters.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Links & resources mentioned:
- https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/events/
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/43
In this episode I interview Julie Bogart (author of the incredible book The Brave Learner and founder of https://bravewriter.com)! Join us as we discuss ideas for making learning fun and how you are responsible for your child’s education even if you don’t homeschool.
[6:53] “How you relate to your child around their education is the key to successful growth of their love of learning.”
[10:47] We can partner with our children to give them an education that they enjoy and gives them a hunger for learning.
[13:13] Bring play and enchantment into learning instead of forcing kids to leave play to do hard work.
[15:59] Whether we homeschool or not, an involved parent leads to the best outcomes for our child’s education.
[19:15] The more we support our children, the sooner they choose to try on their own.
[19:36] We need to provide the corresponding level of support to the presenting need.
[22:34] Sometimes the teacher is the leader, sometimes the child is.
[32:56] Don’t miss out on opportunities for your child to learn how to teach, even if it means you have to play a game you don’t particularly enjoy (Pokémon anyone?? 😂 )
[34:49] Learning is invisible to parents (you can’t see in their head) so we often seek “paper and pencil” for reassurance that learning is occuring.
[38:35] Kids are constantly pay attention and learning...but what they’re paying attention to doesn’t always register in our minds as learning, according to traditional academics.
[39:04] The best approach to screen time (spoiler alert; there isn’t one).
[45:58] We all struggle at times, but we shouldn’t stay there. No one can live in “struggle” long-term. There needs to be a pivot; we need to find a way to move forward, out of the struggle.
[47:12] The way to move forward is subjective, not prescriptive. It depends on the needs of our individual families and what’s best in each season.
[49:20] “Liberation comes when you take back your right to explore as many options as necessary to find today’s right fit for you and your family.”
Whether we homeschool or not, we are ultimately responsible for our children’s education and need to be as involved as possible to fuel their love for learning.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Links & resources mentioned:
- Julie’s book The Brave Learner
- https://thebravelearner.com/ (be sure to download the free companion guide from this website!)
- https://bravewriter.com/
- Julie’s podcast & blog info
- @JulieBraveWriter
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/42
Do your children lie to you? Or if they’re too young, are you worried they will in the future? I get questions about lying quite often, and in this episode we’re going to talk about why children lie and what we can do about it.
[4:13] Lying is a natural part of a child’s development.
[5:45] Younger kids sometimes don’t differentiate between reality and their imagination.
[8:04] They start using their imagination to attempt to alter reality.
[9:27] They start to lie because they’re aware of what we want to hear or to avoid trouble.
[14:58] Let’s try to be less offended and angry when our children lie. It’s part of growing up and it’s going to happen.
[16:11] We really don’t value the truth as much as we say or think we do. We lie to ourselves and others frequently.
[18:55] We even lie to our children.
[22:03] We often lie to protect ourselves.
[22:37] Our kids lie to us because they think we can't handle the truth.
[23:25] We need to model honesty.
[25:22] Let’s show our kids that we value honesty over smooth sailing (and keep calm when they tell us the truth).
[26:03] When they do lie, it’s important to guide them back to honesty without shaming and punishing them.
[30:56] There’s a powerful link between truth and trust, and it goes both ways (our trust in them, and their trust in us).
[34:25] We can respond playfully and calmly when we catch our children lying.
This will set a foundation for connection with our kids, creating trustworthy and truthful relationships for years to come.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Links & resources mentioned:
- https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/events
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/41
Does it frustrate you when you ask your children to do something, and they don’t do it? Do your kids ever tune you out or not hear you when you’re trying to talk to them? Do they ever dig in their heels or do the opposite of what you’re asking them to do? Doesn’t it just drive you CRAZY sometimes?? Or is it just me?
In this episode we’re going to talk about why children don’t “listen” and what we can do to improve the odds they’ll cooperate and comply with our requests more often.
- [3:56] The term “listen” has become a euphemism for “obey.”
- [7:05] Let’s aim for this instead of obedience.
- [9:40] There are times when we need our children to comply with a request.
- [10:38] There are many reasons why kids...even you and me...don't listen.
- [13:09] They might be busy or in "flow.”
- [13:56] They might have a more pressing need.
- [16:04] Don't have what they need (tools, skills, etc.) to fulfill a request.
- [17:03] They might not understand what we’re asking.
- [18:24] They don't want to do what we've asked them to do.
- [20:39] Hunter Clarke-Fields explains how we’re often the ones not listening.
- [24:31] How do we make ourselves heard? There has to be some friction that breaks their concentration.
- [26:39] Go down to their level, make eye contact, and speak calmly, clearly, and in a way they can understand.
- [28:15] If you’re interrupting them, let them know when they can get back to what they were doing.
- [30:47] Sometimes you will still have to follow through and help them.
- [32:38] Minimize the number of requests we make and only request things that are really important.
- [34:36] We must model listening by listening to them (as much as possible).
We won’t (and can’t) do all of these things perfectly every single time, but it’s something to work toward.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to Instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on Instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resources Mentioned:
- Why obedience is NOT my goal
- Obedience vs. Respect
- Hunter Clarke-Fields
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/40
Is the battle over your children’s screen time a constant source of frustration (and tantrums!)? Are you concerned they’re spending too much time on screens and that it might be unhealthy and even stunting their mental, social, and physical development?
🙋🏽 I’m right there with you.
In this episode I talk with Dr. Alok Kanojia (a world-class addiction psychiatrist and reformed gamer) and his wife Kruti about gaming and screen time, breaking down the intricacies and nuances that will help each of us address the issue in our own families.
[3:05] What is Healthy Gamer?
[7:16] It’s challenging to balance children’s screen time without isolating them from their friends and community.
[8:48] If it causes a problem in a major area of life (mental, social, physical, etc.), then it is a problem.
[11:04] Reframe conversations with our children about video games/screen time and avoid being antagonistic.
[12:00] Consider having weekly check-ins where you discuss gaming & screen time with your child, creating a sense of shared responsibility and goals.
[13:27] Figure out what type of gamer our children are (do they like to build & create vs. high intensity and competition). It will help us find offline activities that they’ll be interested in.
[16:40] What’s a healthy amount of game/screen time?
[19:30] Research indicates that violence in games doesn’t increase violence in real life. The communities that form around games are more concerning than the games themselves.
[20:10] Move away from headsets to speakers so we can hear what our children are hearing when they play (especially any conversation that’s happening with other people in the game).
[21:43] Watch for when our children have that blank stare/zoned out look. That’s a good time to transition to something else.
[22:18] Watch out for dopamine burnout. That’s when addiction can set in, and may require more direct intervention.
[24:00] How do we set healthy boundaries and expectations?
[27:20] Find other ways for children to enjoy the characters and stories they love (soundtracks, short stories, etc.).
[29:47] Kids who gravitate toward games are often intelligent and are seeking ways to be challenged.
[32:52] Should we limit screen time? There’s no one-size-fits-all.
[34:32] We’re trying to model and teach our children restraint, not restriction.
In the end, we need to trust our parental intuition to determine what’s right for our families. And we need to have grace for ourselves as we try things and figure out what works best for each unique child.
To find out more about Dr. Alok and Kruti Kanojia's work, head over to https://www.healthygamer.gg/.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to Instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/39
Have you ever seen a parent who really knows how to connect with kids? I think we all know someone who knows how to get them laughing and win them over with ease. One who can speak to kids at their level, calm them down when they get a little crazy or help them feel better when they’re upset.
My brother is like this and it’s amazing to watch him in action. I wish it came as naturally to me as it does to him. Can you relate?
In this episode, we’re talking about what playful parenting is, why it works, and how you can incorporate it into your life right now.
- [4:48] Playfulness is a superpower when it comes to interacting with children.
- [6:58] Responding to a situation playfully not only calms our children down but also calms ourselves down.
- [8:16] Play is how children learn, communicate feelings, connect with others, and deal with stressful situations.
- [9:45] Playfulness can help children express complex emotions.
- [11:05] Children can learn how to overcome fear when we role-play and teach them how to “talk” to fear.
- [11:55] Teach them to overcome shyness.
- [12:36] Teach them about diversity and being kind to people who are different.
- [13:21] Prepare them for a difficult situation, like going to the doctor.
- [15:25] Help them learn how to deal with sibling rivalry.
- [17:06] Use play to get their cooperation and diffuse power struggles...like when you’re in a rush to go somewhere and your child is moving very slowly.
- [18:49] Become contrary and silly about something you want them to do (like washing their hands with soap).
- [20:14] When they’re resisting you, try the “full agreement” game.
- [22:25] Additional ideas
Playful parenting has so much potential to transform life with your children. All it takes is a little imagination and a good dose of silliness!
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to Instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on Instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/38
In this episode I talk about the reality that as our children grow into adulthood, they may “veer off” the path that we hoped for them. Have you ever worried about that? Have you thought about how you may feel if they turn out to be different than the person you wanted them to be? How would you handle it if you’re disappointed about who they become?
- [4:25] We have a lot of influence in their early years.
- [5:51] Then there are the teenage years…
- [6:58] We want our children to be able to think for themselves, but we also don’t want them to make “bad” decisions.
- [8:39] What’s our long term vision for our relationship with our children?
- [10:30] We need to start accepting them for who they are.
- [12:36] What I mean by acceptance (and what it's not).
- [16:35] How can we not only accept who they are today, but also who our children will become?
- [18:21] What are some of those things you think you wouldn’t be able to accept or tolerate?
- [19:49] Not accepting our children may result in losing our relationship with them.
- [23:38] Not accepting our children may cause them to lose relationship with themselves.
- [25:32] Let’s not let our own agenda for our children overpower our unconditional love for them.
- [27:12] Tolerance isn’t enough. We must accept, love, and celebrate who they are (and who they’re becoming).
- [29:30] The byproduct of this level of acceptance will be more influence.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to Instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on Instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Resource
- Show notes: www.theparentingjunkie.com/37
In this episode we’re going to talk about religious practices, faith, and religious communities. People often ask me about how they can combine their passion and commitment to parenting from a loving and respectful place with their commitment to their faith (which might be based on a type of rewards system itself!) It’s a tough but important question to answer. And this doesn’t apply to just organized religion; it’s applicable to any sort of belief system or way of life (like veganism, atheism, or any of the other “isms”).
- [4:08] How do we get our children to adopt our belief system without controlling or manipulating?
- [6:20] Dr. Shefali shares her thoughts on religion and parenting.
- [11:44] Those raised in a religious home often feel obligated to “carry the torch”.
- [15:15] Any religion, belief, or way of life can come from a place of love or fear.
- [16:59] Trying to force others into our beliefs is a sign of insecurity.
- [18:09] Others raised in a religious home completely abandon their faith as they come of age.
- [19:25] It doesn’t have to be “all-or-nothing”. We can throw out what doesn’t serve us and keep what does.
- [23:06] Use critical thinking and discernment.
- [24:34] Check our motives; are we doing (or not doing) something because we’re afraid of what others might think or say?
- [26:22] Do our beliefs make us separatists?
- [27:41] Is there duality in our beliefs?
- [29:41] We should share our beliefs with our children and give them space to explore and make their own interpretations.
- [30:15] Instead of forcing, controlling, or manipulating religious activity, let’s inspire it.
- [33:20] Try to create positive interactions. Make the positive to negative ratio 5:1.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to Instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on Instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Links & Resources
- Gottman Institute article
- Show notes: www.theparentingjunkie.com/36
In this episode we’ll discuss spirituality in parenting, regardless of one’s religion.
- [6:50] Are religious people happier?
- [8:29] Organized religions often facilitate social ties and community.
- [10:15] Religious people create time to pursue spiritual feelings and emotions.
- [13:25] We can harness these same feelings and emotions in our parenting.
- [14:58] If you’re curious about my personal spirituality…
- [17:50] Parenting itself is an act of spirituality.
- [18:21] Gratitude
- [21:13] Giving
- [24:45] Create a gateway to your emotions and spirituality and make it part of your day-to-day life.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to Instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on Instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Links & Resources
- Show notes: www.theparentingjunkie.com/35
- Quote from Brené Brown at 4:50: “Spirituality is recognizing and celebrating that we are all inextricably connected to each other by a power greater than all of us, and that our connection to that power and to one another is grounded in love and compassion. Practicing spirituality brings a sense of perspective, meaning, and purpose to our lives.” This definition was first published in The Gifts of Imperfection. For some people, that power greater than us is God; for others, it’s fishing. Some are reminded of our inextricable connection by faith; others by expressions of shared humanity. Some find that religion is the best expression of inextricable human connection that is guided by love and compassion, and others believe that no entity has done more to corrode that connection than organized religion.”
Leadership and Family. How about Leadership and Parenting? Do these words go together?
When you became a parent maybe you began to feel more like a servant than a leader. Maybe you feel like you just need to keep people alive and happy, get them what they need, and be there for them.
Leadership is an act of service, but it's very different than being a servant. When we're servants we don't have a vision, but when we're leaders this is at the very crux of good leadership.
A clear vision.
In this episode we’re going to talk about leadership and how we can be effective leaders for our families. A lot of us were thrown into this parenting role without developing our skills as a leader.
- [3:46] Most of us default to what was modeled for us in our own childhood. Perhaps your own parents were permissive (weak leaders) or authoritarian (overbearing leaders).
- [7:08] Sometimes parenthood feels more like being a servant than a leader.
- [9:23] We should look to influential leaders for inspiration in our parenting.
- [11:30] We are of service to our children, but not servants to them.
- [15:12] What would it look like if we stepped into the role of being the visionary for our family?
- [17:53] Bad bosses can teach us what NOT to do.
- [21:06] Great bosses can show us what it looks like to successfully lead a group of individuals.
- [23:36] We have an obligation to create a vision for our family…and it doesn’t happen through control.
- [26:59] Children need leaders.
- [28:01] Leaders keep themselves together. They don’t melt down on those they lead.
- [30:06] We have to be willing to make hard choices, often with imperfect information, and deal with the conflict or consequences.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to Instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on Instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5-star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly, they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like-minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Links & Resources
- Show notes: www.theparentingjunkie.com/34
- Related Podcast: “I am the curriculum”
The word authority gets a bad rap when it comes to peaceful parenting because it tends to get lumped in with the authoritarian parenting style which is the “do as I say or else” style. But authority is actually well rooted in the authoritative style where you have high expectations but you also provide high support and warmth.
When we choose to abdicate our role as the authority, our children are then left to make decisions they are not ready to make. Instead, if we become that empathetic firm leader, our children can relax because they know there's someone at the helm.
We need to get comfortable being the authority figure. As Janet Lansbury said “Children NEED parents. They feel no real freedom without boundaries. They are not little adults with the maturity to make healthy, thoughtful, sensible decisions about screen use, sugar intake, etc.” I couldn’t agree more.
In this episode, I’ll share why being the authority figure in your family actually liberates your children and 3 ways to get comfortable being the authority figure...here’s what you’ll hear:
[6:19] It’s our JOB!
[7:30] Authoritative vs. Authoritarian
[11:06] Legal and moral responsibility
[12:47] Social and physical responsibility
[15:50] Is authority harsh?
[16:41] Don’t throw your kids in the deep end 🏊♀️
[18:47] Downside of democracy (in the home)
[22:23] Janet Lansbury’s take on parenting by democracy
[25:42] Eventually you will have no more authority…
[26:44] #1 - Give small choices
[30:44] #2 - Get comfortable
[33:02] #3 - Why it’s an act of generosity
Remember, when children have a leader and have clarity around the expectations of the home they are liberated and free to enjoy the ride.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5 star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/33
With all the great information and examples of parenting the way you desire to out there, do you ever feel like you constantly fall short? Like you’re failing as a parent and just not measuring up?
You’ve heard it before, “comparison is the thief of joy.” But, in this information at our fingertips world we are living in, it can be difficult to not fall into the trap of comparing.
We can also get discouraged even when we don’t compare ourselves to others but to some ideal version of ourselves that we constantly fail to be. It can feel like a mountain towering over you with SO many areas to work on, and no one is immune (myself included).
In this episode, I’ll share the cause of this distress and 3 things to help you overcome it...here’s what you’ll hear:
[4:22] Information overload 📚
[7:43] Check your expectations
[10:30] Breathe with me (bookmark this for later if you’re driving or want to keep coming back for more! 🧘♀️)
[12:38] #1 - What to do if you MUST Compare
[15:50] #2 - What we can learn from Warren Buffett
[19:49] #3 - 🎶Celebrate good times, come on! 🎶
You can do this, you ARE doing this, treat yourself with compassion and celebrate your wins!
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @theparentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5 star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/32
I was chatting with a friend who’s recently become a first time mom. Her baby is just turning one and she told me: “I’ve really let myself go”... she described how she hasn’t been to the gym since her pregnancy, how she’s enslaved herself in service of her baby and how she hasn’t been out with her girlfriends in months.
If this is you, I’m going to share a mindset shift that will help you break free of victimhood and enslavement parenting - and how your child will benefit greatly from this shift as well.
You’ve heard it before, you’ve probably even said it - my children are my WHOLE world, my kids are my life. I know I have. It’s true that when we become a parent our children take a place in our lives that’s greater than anything that has come before them. We would literally lay down our life for our children.
While we would sacrifice our lives to save our children should we also sacrifice our life, well-being, and happiness just to care for them? And if we do so what are we actually modeling for our children? What type of parents will they grow up to be when we choose this path?
Parenting like this can lead to burnout. Maybe it’s time we also focus not just on parenting the whole child but on being the WHOLE parent...here’s what you’ll hear:
[4:29] What is a whole life?
[6:37] Tying our worth to our sacrifice
[9:08] More sacrifice, more work = better parent? (spoiler alert: NO, it doesn’t)
[11:12] This does NOT mean become a narcissist
[14:10] You make me…
[16:46] The solution! Yes please!
[18:14] Nourish yourself 🧘♀️
[19:51] Drop “or” - use “and” instead!
[20:55] You are MORE than just a parent
Remember, you are the curriculum. How you show up, including most of all, how you treat yourself, is what your child will learn. Are you treating yourself the way you hope they grow up to treat themselves?
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @theparentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5 star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/31
Are you a working parent who tends to feel guilty while at work that you should be with your kids but then also feels guilty while with your kids that you should be working? Or perhaps you’re not a working parent but you are trying to meet your needs and desires in some way be it fitness, or a hobby and also feel guilty when trying to balance the two?
If you’ve ever felt like you’re a failure on all fronts this episode is for you!
This episode will mainly focus on balancing the needs from a work perspective but you can apply it to any faucet of your life. When we try to show up as different versions of ourselves and hide the parts of ourselves we don’t feel belong under that hat we can be left feeling fragmented, like we are a failure in both areas of our lives.
You’ll learn how to change your language to change your mind (spoiler alert: realize you have ONE life). Also, you’ll realize that it is ok and even expected if your experience in one role affects your experience in the other because after all, you are one integrated person.
In this episode we’ll discuss “work-life balance.” Is it an illusion to think that you can truly balance your work life and home life, especially in modern times when there is less separation between the 2? Here’s what you’ll hear:
[5:01] Conform to Society’s Desire?
[6:58] Bring home the bacon AND spend more time with your kids
[10:39] It’s all in how you frame it
[13:11] Drop “or” choose “and” instead!
[14:26] You don’t have to hide your “momness” at work
[17:17] You don’t have to hide your professional self at home
[18:41] Forget work-life, you have ONE life
[20:59] Working IS good parenting - drop the guilt!
[24:03] What are you teaching your children? (You don’t wanna miss this!)
[28:37] Resent the “2nd shift”? If so this is the reframe that will change your life!
So is work-life balance achievable? Yes, of course. But only when you stop treating them as separate things and treat them as faucets of the one integrated life you have.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @theparentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5 star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Come join the messy middle and connect to like minded parenting junkies!
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/30
We’re faced with many decisions in this parenting journey, and many options seem to be extreme on one side or the other.
Should you be a whole life unschooler, or punish your children when they don’t get straight As in school?
Should you work outside the home and climb the corporate ladder or should you surrender to a life of staying at home, giving up on your interests and income in favor of parenting?
Should you give them free access to screens or should you be completely screen free?
Not only does it feel polarizing but it also can make us feel like we don’t really fit in anywhere if we aren’t on either end of the extreme.
I’m going to offer up an alternative - the radical middle. I won’t say it will be easy. Let’s face it, when you make the decision to stay curious and not sit on either end of the extreme it can be hard. You’re choosing to create a path instead of following one that’s already laid down. Being in the middle means we think about all the decisions and what works for us right now and we stay open to learn more and change our minds if a different decision would better meet our families needs.
In this episode we’ll discuss how you don’t have to choose one extreme over another, and that most of us fall somewhere in the middle of the spectrum. Here’s what you’ll hear:
[5:03] Decision fatigue is real
[8:36] How to combat decision fatigue
[9:53] Example 1: Discipline
[13:27] Example 2: Sleep training
[17:11] Example 3: Education
[19:18] Example 4: Boundaries
[23:00] What is my identity in parenting?
[24:02] The radical middle.
[25:50] Pick what’s best and leave the rest.
[29:19] The middle is hard
[32:44] The middle is brave
[34:44] The middle is radical.
The middle can be messy. It’s not always neat and clear because there is no one size fits all. At the end of the day the answer is always “it depends.”
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @theparentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5 star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Come join the messy middle and connect to like minded parenting junkies!
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/29
Are schools like prison? A human rights violation? Is forced education immoral and abusive? If so… what are the millions and millions of parents with school-going kids to do? If this concerns you, listen up.
You've heard the experts like Ken Robinson and Alfie Kohn weigh in that "schools kill creativity" or that "schools are feel bad education." In fact, schools have been compared to prison in that they limit children’s freedom and choices. In many cases they also do not give the education we want for our children, I know this is true in my case.
But I also know that what works for me does NOT work for everyone. If you are in a situation, whether it be financial, psychological, etc, in which homeschooling does not work for you, I’m here to reassure you that is ok too!
Often times we look at the negative aspects of the school system but we forget to look at the possible negative impact of switching to homeschooling if it’s not a good fit for the family. Switching to homeschooling could lead to a burnt out mom, stressed from trying to figure out how to replace her income now that she quit her job to homeschool and stressed about whether her child is keeping up or not and what activities she needs to plan. Is that really better for the kids in the long run?
Even if you have accepted your reality that homeschooling is not right for your family perhaps you still worry about the school available to you. Maybe the school focuses a lot on grades creating a very competitive environment. Or perhaps they have the homework “rule” of an hour per grade level. Or maybe it’s just the context of school in general - the “cool” kids and the potential materialism that could lead to or processed sugary foods being the only real foods available. Whatever it is that you are worrying about I’ll remind you why you need to let it go. You’re worrying does not serve anyone, especially your children, in-fact it may even be making their challenges in school more difficult.
Even if you’ve made your decision and feel completely comfortable in your choice you’ll still gain something from this episode, we even have an expert guest (spoiler alert: Dr. Shefali Tsabary!!) Here’s what you’ll hear:
[6:13] Schools are prisons (at least according to some people)
[15:24] Should my kids stay or go? 🤷♀️
[17:19] Does that serve your children? (or you?)
[18:15] Pause and take a breath before deciding 🧘♀️
[21:38] There’s always a cost 💰
[23:40] Get real
[24:26] Accept it
[26:04] Be fluid and flexible
[27:58] What would Dr. Shefali do? 💕
[30:41] We all need to calm the 🤬down
[31:54] You can bring the change you want to see!
[33:16] Hack the system!
At the end of the day you have to accept your reality. You need to find a way to work with whatever you cannot change.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @theparentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5 star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/28
Should we follow & encourage our children’s passions - like animals, robots or ballerinas - or drill into them the things they need to know, like math, science, and literacy?
If you are homeschooling do you find yourself wanting to follow your child’s interest and NOT simply replicate the school system in your home but worry they will miss out on the important skills we need to teach them?
Or maybe your child attends school and it seems you always have to fight with them to finish their homework or to study.
No matter what your path, this episode has some inspiration and practical tangible steps to bring the enchantment back to learning!
So, how can we motivate our children to learn the common core subjects? How can we make sure they get the knowledge without undermining their intrinsic motivation? It can feel like the options are to follow the child completely, as in radical unschooling, or impose our agenda on them either by sending them to school or following a set curriculum at home are our only options.
What if I told you there was a third way? In this episode we’re going to explore how to do both. How to follow your child's interests AND make sure they are learning the skills they need to know. I’ll give you 3 actionable steps as well as 3 practical examples to get you started. Here’s what you’ll hear:
[3:51] How will my child learn math if princesses is all she will talk about? 👸
[6:25] Can’t I just force them to learn?
[7:07] What’s wrong with candy in exchange for long division problems completed? 🍭
[8:24] Learning IS fun, right?
[11:29] You can learn EVERYTHING through ANYTHING
[13:22] Step 1: PJ masks, paw patrol, fairies… what is it?
[15:22] Step 2: Map it out
[15:57] Step 3: A little planning goes a long way
[16:36] Example 1: The world through Lego
[23:39] Example 2: Enchant with Harry Potter
[33:06] Example 3: Yes even Princesses can be educational!
By using this method we become a partner in their education. We collaborate with them by following their interests all the way through to the myriad of ways it can actually provide the education we may have on our adult agenda. When we teach and guide children in this way much of the resistance falls away and makes way for passion. With this education then becomes a fun and creative endeavor.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @theparentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5 star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/27
Are you an entrepreneur or trying to get a business off the ground but have no idea how to fit it all in with young kids? Are you interested in unschooling or radical unschooling and are unsure of what that even looks like? Or do you just simply struggle to feel brave in your parenting choices given all the uncertainty and conflicting information you find? No matter your situation this episode has something for you!
In this episode you’ll hear a conversation I had with Kim Constable, The Sculpted Vegan. Kim is a yoga teacher, and a competitive vegan body-builder who started her business in the health and fitness industry founding multi-million dollar deyogatox and the sculpted vegan.
If you ask Kim what her first and foremost role is she will tell you it is being a mother. She decided to take her two eldest children out of school and embark on a journey of radical unschooling. If you’re wondering what radical unschooling looks like, you’re in luck, Kim shares her beliefs, biggest struggles, and biggest wins when it comes to radically unschooling (spoiler alert: it’s okay to not know everything 🤔).
In this episode Kim shares how she scheduled her time and did it all while starting her business before she had any help as well as her views on hiring help. This also includes how her and her husband handled their respective roles in the family and how to stay crystal clear on your vision even through the hard times. We also get to hear what it is like to radically unschool 4 children and how that works in her family.
In this heart to heart talk between two vegan, unschooling, entrepreneurial mothers of 4, you’ll hear:
[2:50] How do you have time for it all? 🕰
[9:21] Finding a way to replace your roles
[15:12] Thinking of starting a business? The first thing you should do!
[17:31] Laundry is not going to grow you or your business 🧺
[21:30] You can’t see the success happen from the beginning
[24:31] What opened the door to Kim learning about alternative parenting choices
[31:04] Jumping on the trampoline at 2am!?
[32:52] No rules? What!? 🤯
[38:11] What about screens?
[47:33] We all get triggered 😡
[53:35] What about the mess!? 🧹
[57:13] Without rules on food won’t my kids just eat cookies? 🍪
[1:02:34] What do you mean you don’t know??🤷♀️
The work lies in truly coming to accept your child for who they are and not who you want them to be.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @theparentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5 star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/26
In this episode, we’ll explore why you can have a clean and beautiful house or you can care for your children, but you can’t have both…at least, not if you want to stay sane.
Or can you? Let’s find out.
[3:59] The sanity triangle.
[6:25] Dichotomy vs. integration.
[8:09] Can we find a balance?
[10:54] Embrace the wobble.
[12:58] Life is made up of seasons.
[15:05] The interconnectedness of all things.
[19:16] You’re worth the effort it takes.
[22:10] Your worthiness isn’t dependent on a clean and tidy home.
[23:34] You own your sanity.
Links & Resources
- Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/25
- Related Blog Post: How to Get Your Kids to Do Chores
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @theparentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5 star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Do you desperately need help, but you’re worried you can’t afford it? Do you want a mother’s helper or assistant, but you’re not sure where to find them or how much they’ll cost? Do you wonder if there’s an affordable option for those who are less privileged? Do you feel guilty at the thought of paying for help?
In this episode we’ll discuss getting the help you so desperately need!
[4:24] Nicole’s story: How she found a free mother’s helper.
[6:38] Your need for help is someone else’s opportunity for connection, community, & meaningful contribution.
[7:54] Find or create a co-op with other parents.
[8:30] If you can, pay for help!
[10:07] What to do if there’s no wiggle room in your budget.
[12:40] Be open and receptive to help.
[13:46] It’s not as expensive as you think. You’d be surprised to see how far a few dollars can go.
[14:38] Sometimes “I can’t afford it” is an excuse for not prioritizing it or placing enough value on it.
[15:42] Help is a worthy expense.
[18:20] You may need to rearrange your budget.
[21:42] Abraham Hick’s quote: “You can’t get sick enough to help sick people get better. You can’t get poor enough to help poor people thrive. It is only in your thriving that you have anything to offer anyone…”
[22:08] Sometimes it comes down to choice.
[23:31] You are worth it.
[25:47] Don’t kill the golden goose.
[29:19] Consider the cost of not getting help.
Links & Resources
- Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/24
- Related Blog Post: Supermom Syndrome (https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/let-go-of-supermom-syndrome/
- Podcast episode on Parental Burnout https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/22)
- Podcast episode on Parenting Like an Olympic Champion (https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/15)
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @theparentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5 star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Do you desperately need a break, but feel like you can’t trust anyone with your kids? Do you fear what might happen to them (some disaster or catastrophe), what might be said to them, or what might be taught to them if you’re not there?
In this episode we’ll address some common fears that parents have about leaving their kids with other people.
[5:04] Are these fears holding you back?
[7:37] Anything that’s rooted in fear will not lead us down the path of joy.
[8:26] The inability to trust others with our children leads to burnout.
[9:25] There are risks when you don’t trust your kids with other people.
[11:49] Allow your children to have secure attachments to more than one adult.
[12:43] Are you the only perfect caregiver for your children?
[14:04] You can’t work on any job, project or relationship 24/7. You need time off.
[15:11] It’s time to get help.
[18:03] I get it…some relatives make it really, really hard.
[19:12] Practice an attitude of gratitude.
[19:48] Practice compassion & mindfulness.
[20:22] Have faith in your child’s competency.
[20:44] Model politeness & affection without forcing it.
[21:02] Set firm, empathic limits when boundaries are crossed.
[21:52] Get professional help with toxicity.
[22:44] Don’t be afraid to use mother’s helpers, baby-sitters, or nannies.
To checkout the role play series with Dr. Laura Markham mentioned in this episode head over to the blog.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @theparentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5 star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/23
Have you ever looked at your kids and wondered why you had them? Do you find yourself why you got into this or wanting some way out at times?
Whether you’re feeling burned out or want to prevent burnout, this episode is for you. Burnout is a very real risk we face as parents, and if you’re experiencing it now (or have ever experienced it), you’re not alone. And if you haven’t experienced it yet…prepare yourself, because it’s inevitable unless you take these precautions.
In this episode, I’m sharing what parental burnout is, why it is important to avoid, and practical steps to take to avoid burning out...here’s what you’ll hear:
[2:27] What is parental burnout?
[8:31] Your warning light is on
[14:29] One more “B” to add to Attachment Parenting
[15:36] Take a Break 🏝
[19:27] Get Help! (More on this in upcoming episodes!)
[20:31] Just say NO!
[24:11] Bundle! 💕
[26:34] Talk to someone
[27:07] Back to basics
You are worth it. Your children are worth it. You deserve to enjoy this season of life and your kids deserve to see a parent who enjoys life and who takes good care of herself. Don’t wait until you burnout. Start taking these steps today!
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @theparentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5 star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/22
If nursing happens to be one of the things causing you to feel burnt out checkout my blog post on Gentle Weaning here.
Do you ever feel like an imposter? Like one day someone will catch you out as a fraud? Like your kids will need therapy to recover from the dark secrets in your life?
A quick google of imposter syndrome will result in articles all relating to imposter syndrome within our careers or professions. But what about parenting? Imposter syndrome is just as real in parenting as it is in the professional world and it can leave us feeling frozen, low, alone and end up robbing us of the joy in parenting.
In this episode you’ll discover how to overcome imposter syndrome as a parent.
Here’s what you’ll hear:
[3:43] What is imposter syndrome?
[8:29] Make it go away!!
[9:59] You’re not alone!
[12:55] Live in integrity
[16:07] There’s more than one way to do it
[18:29] It’s not ALL about you!
[20:13] Own your greatness! 💪
[23:16] Mistakes are okay
[25:33] Put it down! 📱
[26:17] Be weird!
[31:06] Your Super Power 🦸♀️
[32:31] Fake it ‘til you make it
[34:17] You’re a different you
[35:35] Be an eternal student
[36:44] Extinguish Imposter Syndrome! 🧯
[37:48] Life is short
If you want to see the ways I feel like an imposter check out my blog post here.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @theparentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5 star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/21
No matter where you are on your parenting journey - just found out you are expecting, have a newborn at home, toddler, kids in school, kids at home, one child, 10 children, today’s episode is for you!
Being a parent can feel overwhelming, exhausting, isolating, confusing, and challenging. The good news is it doesn’t have to.
In this episode, I’m sharing my advice for new parents, advice for parents of toddlers, and advice for parents that have been parenting for awhile now...here’s what you’ll hear:
[3:28] Let me tell you a story 📖
[8:26] Expectant Parents or New Parents - this one’s for you...
[14:13] Have a toddler? This one's for you...
[20:01] Permission Granted (not that you need it)
[22:32] Have older kids? Multiple kids? This one’s for you…
[27:07] Find your tribe 👯♀️
Remember, childhood doesn’t just happen, you get to CREATE it if you so CHOOSE!
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @theparentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5 star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital
Present Play is now Open (through May 15th)! Come see if this is the tribe for you!
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/20
For the first time in two centuries in America children are expected to have shorter life expectancies than their parents. Luckily there is a free resource available to almost everyone to help combat this statistic.
In the past 2 episodes we’ve been discussing major obstacles to independent play and what can be done about them. In episode 17 we discussed decluttering which addresses the environment as a hindrance to independent play. Then in episode 18 we outlined what strewing is which addresses dependency as a hindrance to independent play. The last major obstacle to independent play is time and there is one way of spending time that yields phenomenal gains!
In this episode you’ll discover a free, simple and healing practice to introduce into your flow as much as possible to ensure a healthy, vibrant and happy childhood for your kids...here’s what you’ll hear:
[6:21] The real threat to our children’s health
[9:32] A different type of medication
[11:17] You CAN do it!
[12:42] The challenge
[14:20] A total game changer
[16:18] The secret to healthier children 💪
[20:56] Going to get a little vulnerable here…
[23:46] Yes you CAN!
Remember, this week (or anytime) you are feeling overwhelmed at home and the kids seem stir crazy head outside and reap the benefits!
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @theparentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5 star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital
The (free) three week Reclaim Play challenge is dropping April 15th Grab Your Spot NOW!
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/19
- Are you sabotaging your children’s behavior in subconscious ways, without even realizing it? You have a hidden power of influence that you may not even be aware of.
Think about the last time you were at an airport or bus station, did someone have to verbally tell you or physically show you what to do? Would you act the same way in an airport as you do in a church? Or do you feel really creative and expressive in either of those places? Chances are you behave very differently depending on the location you are in and do so without being explicitly told to do so.
In this episode you’ll discover a way to influence your children, your husband - even your own behavior - without the use of words. You can create more ease and flow in your life and reduce friction around day to day activities using this powerful tool. Here’s what you’ll hear:
[5:56] Stop feeling like a nag
[9:57] The hidden power that changes everything
[11:05] How our behavior is influenced without any words
[16:56] Use this to your advantage!
[18:43] Clutter creates chaos
[19:24] Items hold an energy (from a woo woo and a psychological perspective)
[22:52] Create cohesiveness
[23:41] Strewing!!! 🎉Spoiler Alert: You do NOT need more Toys!!
[28:14] Take it to the next level!
The things we see subconsciously trigger certain thoughts and associations in our mind which make us feel a certain way which make us behave a certain way. Are you using this to help you achieve the behavior you want to see?
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @theparentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5 star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital
The (free) three week Reclaim Play challenge is dropping April 15th Grab Your Spot NOW
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/18
“No mommy I love this, this is my all time favorite toy” – said every kid whose parent ever tried to declutter the toy that they have not touched in 2 years.
Sound familiar?
Tens of thousands of parents have gone through this free and simple process with me and it can make such a dramatic difference in their child’s play. The problem parents run into is not due to the complexity of decluttering but is actually due to their own beliefs sabotaging the efforts they make.
On the surface decluttering toys doesn’t seem like a big deal. What parents don’t realize is that it usually leads to a pandora’s box of emotions and fears.
In this episode you’ll discover the seven most common reasons people have too many toys and why it’s difficult to downsize. It’s time to overcome these limiting beliefs and clear the way for a decluttered, soothing play space!
[3:37] “You’re not a real minimalist!”
[5:36] But EVERYTHING sparks Joy 🥰
[11:20] #1: It’s all about Love! 💕
[13:23] #2: The hidden ball and chain
[15:16] #3: How else will she become the next Einstein?
[17:42] #4: Gotta keep up with the Jones’ kids!
[19:32] #5: The most seductive of our methods
[21:49] #6: Don’t pay for it twice!
[23:24] #7: Fear Fear Fear 😱
Ultimately the relationship we have with our stuff mimics the relationship we have with ourselves and the world.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @theparentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5 star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital
The (free) three week Reclaim Play challenge started April 15th Grab Your Spot NOW!
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/17
How can we discipline our children in a way that’s effective, meaningful, and peaceful? Do you ever feel like you are under incredible pressure to “discipline your child” but aren’t quite sure what exactly that means or what to do? It can be difficult with culture’s mandates and our own irritation levels to know exactly what to do.
In this episode, you’ll discover the true meaning of discipline. I’ll be giving you 3 actionable steps to take toward better disciplining your child.
[2:55] How do punishments work? Hint hint - not the way you think
[3:55] What does discipline even mean anyways?
[6:51] I’ve told him time and time again
[10:05] What does practice have to do with discipline?
[13:49] Step 1 - Show, don’t tell
[19:28] Step 2 - We get what we pay for
[26:14] Step 3 - Be the student
Be the change you wish to see in your child and guide them along the way!
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @theparentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5 star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital
The (free) three week Reclaim Play challenge is dropping April 15th Grab Your Spot NOW
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/16
Do you want to create a meaningful relationship with your children? One that you have earned their trust and respect? A relationship that even a teenager (or any age for that matter) will still find some points of connection or interest in the relationship with you? What does it take to sustain a true relationship?
What if we approached our relationship with our children the same way Olympic athletes approach their sport and their training?
In this episode you’ll discover how you can be the best parent you can be, worthy of a gold medal. You’ll learn how to develop a game plan and feel confident you’re focusing on the right things – the right things for YOU and YOUR child. Here’s what you’ll hear:
[3:20] Why meaningful relationships require a game plan
[6:17] Who we are really competing against
[9:10] Olympic athletes choose their sport - are you owning your choice?
[11:40] Step 1 - Find your area of genius and focus on that
[20:51] Step 2 - How to compound your results
[25:37] Step 3 - Be Consistent
[28:05] Step 4 - Your environment is your biggest supporter or your biggest saboteur.
[32:12] Step 5 - Who are you as a parent? Who do you want to be as a parent? What is your identity as a parent?
[37:19] Step 6 - Fill your own cup first
[39:44] Step 7 - Celebrate your successes and learn from your failures
Remember, this journey of parenting is an important, meaningful, and worthy endeavor, let’s show up to it with the same enthusiasm, passion and joy that an olympic athlete shows up to her sport.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @theparentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5 star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital
The (free) three week Reclaim Play challenge is dropping April 15th Grab Your Spot NOW
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/15
Which school should you send your kids to? What extracurricular activities should they participate in? What books should we read? We’re obsessed with providing the best for our kids.
In this episode I’m going to tell you why none of that matters as much as we think it does, and what I believe we should focus on instead.
Spoiler alert - it's not what (or how) you think.
Think back to your childhood - what were the biggest lessons you learned? Were they the ones that were dictated to you? The ones taught directly in school via a lesson plan?
Or perhaps were they the ones that weren't directly spoken or intended?
Usually the real lessons came between the “lessons.” How the adults in our lives spoke to us, spoke to each other, how they behaved, how they viewed the world - these were the real lessons for better or worse.
In this episode, I’m sharing my belief that I am my children’s biggest and most powerful curriculum, and you are YOUR children’s biggest and most powerful curriculum...here’s what you’ll hear:
[3:14] The “real” lessons we learned in our childhood.
[5:47] The default way you are probably parenting, for better or worse
[7:53] What is the true curriculum of childhood 📚 ❓
[8:52] Lecturing does not work. Do you learn best by being directed?
[12:06] What educational institutions are teaching your kids (🤦)
[15:29] The real curriculum is you (what you do, not what you say). Where to find the real curriculum
[20:53] Don’t abdicate! (spoiler alert this is uncomfortable)
[22:25] What we must demand of ourselves
[28:46] How kids learn Social Skills 👯
[31:27] How your kids are learning to Life Management skills 🕐
[35:05] Model a healthy mindset. Mindset 🧠
How you show up, how you treat others, how you manage your life, and the mindset you carry through it all - this is what our children will learn.
If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to instagram stories, and tag me @theparentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!
Are you subscribed to my podcast? Subscribe here so that fresh episodes are delivered directly to you.
Those shiny 5 star ratings and sweet reviews have me all gushy, thank you. But more importantly they help other parents discover the Parenting Junkie Show and spread the word about Loving parenting and Parenting from Love. If you have a moment to spare, those reviews mean the world to me, you can leave one here.
Want to connect to like minded parenting junkies?
Join our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital
The (free) three week Reclaim Play challenge is dropping April 15th Grab Your Spot NOW
Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/14
In this episode you’ll discover a powerful way of viewing your parenting role so you can remove yourself from the drama of childhood and offer the meaningful support your children need.
[1:28] How much should we intervene and solve problems for our kids?
[8:11] Intro to the Story Framework.
[8:59] Basic structure of a story.
[12:48] What does this have to do with parenting?
[13:56] We are not the hero.
[17:32] We are the guide.
[23:02] We give them a plan.
[23:49] We call them to action.
[26:14] We help them succeed and avoid failure.
[26:58] Measure every situation against this framework.
Links & Resources
- Donald Miller’s book “Building A Story Brand”
- theparentingjunkie.com/challenge
Show Notes:
theparentingjunkie.com/13
You’ll discover 3 potent techniques to get back on track to loving your kid so you can flip the script when you start feeling annoyed, irritated or out of love with your child. I’ll even share some personal truths that I don’t usually talk about.
- [1:26] Giveaway winner!
- [4:10] You love your child, but sometimes you don’t like them.
- [6:52] You may not be struggling with this…yet.
- [7:30] You might be burned out.
- [9:35] There might be a mismatch in expectations.
- [14:33] Pretend they are someone else’s child.
- [17:40] Pretend you’re being watched.
- [20:26] Pretend it's your last day on earth with them.
- [22:44] Flip “I can’t” to “I can.”
Links & Resources
- Show notes: www.theparentingjunkie.com/12
- Present Play
I'm sharing my experience and thoughts on sleep training so you can hopefully feel calm, cool, and confident in offering your child the best sleep. I hope you can listen to this episode in its entirety, because this is a nuanced and triggering topic that deserves in depth conversation. I wouldn't want you to miss the full context of the ideas presented here.
- [1:20] Giveaway winner!
- [4:47] 2 Emails I received from concerned parents
- [11:02] We’re all torn over the approach to helping our babies sleep better.
- [21:00] Every child is different and much of their temperament is “baked in” (they’re born with it).
- [23:59] Flaws with thinking that there’s only one way to do it.
- [25:34] What does sleep training mean?
- [27:45] What can be learned from nature?
- [30:24] What does crying mean?
- [39:34] Is sleep deprivation respectful?
- [42:22] Is frustration bad?
- [48:01] Is it all or nothing?
- [49:48] The process with my last child.
- [55:29] We have to trust ourselves.
- [1:01:02] Summary
- [1:05:19] What’s coming next week
Links & Resources
- Present Play
- Batya the Baby Coach
- 3 Things I Love About the RIE Approach
- Show notes: www.parentingjunkie.com/11
Stress…
We don’t want our kids to be stressed, but I think it’s safe to say we all want our children to be able to handle stress.
In this episode I discuss ways to help develop resiliency and anti-fragility in your children so they’ll be prepared to handle the stress of the “real world.”
- [1:37] Giveaway winner!
- [4:43] Stress is inevitable.
- [7:15] Stress can be a positive thing.
- [10:37] Too much stress can be damaging.
- [12:42] Not enough stress can be damaging as well.
- [15:39] Definition of fragile, resilient, adaptive, & antifragility.
- [20:17] Don’t overprotect your children from information.
- [28:07] Don’t overprotect your children from social discomfort.
- [30:17] Don’t overprotect your children from risks.
- [33:27] Don’t overprotect your children in their relationships with other adults.
- [35:03] Don’t overprotect your children from their feelings.
- [38:41] Don’t overprotect your children from responsibility.
- [40:35] Share stories with your children (especially inspiring biographies).
- [42:37] Label your children as strong and resilient.
Links & Resources
- Peaceful Parenting Meditations
- TED Talk: "How to make stress your friend | Kelly McGonical
- Book: “The Coddling Of The American Mind”
- Book: “Free-Range Kids”
- “Who Is…?” series on Audible
- Show notes
We’re bombarded by society (our culture, parents, neighbors, friends, religious institutions, schools, movies, magazines, internet, etc.) with all sorts of inputs and directives about how we’re supposed to raise our children.
It’s time to dispel some common myths about parenting and relieve the pressure of trying to be the “perfect parent.”
Myths we’re busting:
- You are in control of your children.
- There’s one right way to parent.
- Harder is better.
- Parents aren’t sexy or interesting.
- Raising children is boring.
- You should do it alone.
- The days are long, but the years are short.
- Parenting is a “job.”
Links & Resources:
- Show notes: Theparentingjunkie.com/9
- Potty Time Course
Have you ever had thoughts or conversations about natural consequences, logical consequences, punishments, rewards, positive or negative reinforcement, etc., and felt like there was something missing – like there’s a deeper level to it all?
Today we’re going to dive into these terms and get some clarity on what consequences really are, how we can apply them mindfully, and common pitfalls to avoid.
What I cover in this episode:
- Why you should avoid punitive consequences and positive/negative reinforcement.
- How natural consequences are good, but often aren’t enough.
- Extend yourself grace. You won’t get it right 100% of the time. I don’t always get it right, and neither will you.
- 3 types of consequences you probably haven’t heard of
Show notes:
https://theparentingjunkie.com/8
Learn more:
https://theparentingjunkie.com/empathiclimits
You might have been reasonably happy in your marriage before kids came along – but we all know that going from two to three is a major life change and some marriages don’t survive it very well.
It’s really hard to go from wife to mom, or husband to dad. Although parenting is hard, many find that it’s easier than marriage. And so we get stuck in our parenting role and neglect our marriage role.
You may feel you have more control, influence, and even love for your kids, which can make you feel more and more disconnected from your partner. If any of this sounds familiar, there’s hope!
What you’ll hear in this episode:
- How just like mainstream parenting advice is no longer working for families today, mainstream marriage advice is failing us. A new approach to relationships is needed.
- How it’s possible to have a type of home life dynamic where:
- We can all become extremely content and even in love with exactly what we have as we have it.
- We can manage conflict with relative ease and experience high levels of connection and presence with our partners even with very young children.
- How you don’t fix or find a soulmate you BECOME a soulmate.
- Peaceful partnering – creating a loving, lasting, sustainable, and synchronized marriage.
- 3 secrets behind the Parent In Love method.
Show notes: theparentingjunkie.com/7
Watch "How Peaceful Parenting RUINED My Marriage and How I Saved It": theparentingjunkie.com/marriage
It doesn't take two to tango.
Do you ever feel frustrated, disconnected, or misaligned with your spouse or partner? Does it seem like the spark and passion you once had is gone?
Have you ever thought that maybe your relationship has run its course, and it’s time to go separate ways?
If so, I've got good news for you! There is hope for you, AND change is possible, even if you have to work on it without your partner.
Free Masterclass: “How Peaceful Parenting RUINED My Marriage...and How I Saved It.” theparentingjunkie.com/marriage
In this episode, I interview Meredith. Things we discussed:
- How she felt overwhelmed by the demands of life, the unrealistic expectations of society for partners and parents.
- She was so tired of how everyone paints this [phony] picture of what life is supposed to look like, and how it can make us all feel like we’re missing the mark.
- How Meredith and her partner were on the verge of splitting up.
- Not completely miserable, and they had their up moments, but there were a lot of down moments, and it was wearing on them.
- She knew that something needed to change. She was tired of trying to figure it out on her own by reading articles, asking friends for advice (who often ended up reinforcing the negativity), etc.
- They were having the same fights over and over.
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- Budgeting and money.
- Misaligning over approaches to parenting.
- Arguments over where they should live.
- How as partners, we’re supposed to fill each other up, not deplete each other.
- Remember you have choices (own your own choices). Just because you feel it doesn’t make it true. You can always choose how you respond. Don’t let your emotions rule you. You can take a break, clear your head, and come back with a fresh perspective.
- Stop saying yes to everything. Prioritize your time. It’s ok to say no and spend more time with your family. Give yourself permission to say no, to have some downtime, to just be.
- Instead of shoving everything down, putting on the game face, dig in and investigate when you’re feeling angry or stressed.
- Outsource/delegate to give you more time.
- Crystal clear communication (learn to really listen and not take what your spouse is saying personally).
- Think about what kind of memories you want your children to have of you, of their childhood. (what helped her decide to go through the course).
- Investing in the course is a no brainer. We all want our children to grow up to be amazing adults, and feel connected to us.
- The course not only helps you learn how to improve your relationship with your partner, but also helps you deal with other people.
- It doesn’t take both parents. Change is possible even if only one partner is working on it.
Links & Resources
Show Notes: theparentingjunkie.com/6
Free Masterclass: “How Peaceful Parenting RUINED My Marriage...and How I Saved It.” theparentingjunkie.com/marriage
Deal with distractions, enjoy them while they're young and bring peace and calm to your mind.
In this episode I’m going to give you actionable ways to bring more presence into your life so that you can experience regret -free living, enjoy your children (even while they’re young) and feel satisfied that you’re living life to the fullest.
Here’s the best part: It takes less than a minute a day.
In this episode you’ll hear:
● What presence is (and isn’t).
● How you’re not the only one who’s constantly feeling distracted. We all are!
● Why you shouldn’t wait for the “perfect circumstances” to be present, avoiding the “I’ll be present when...” trap.
● Why this is crucial for everyone (even if you think you’re already present or think it’s not for you).
● How to parent a child who grows up thinking “my parent connected with me and was there for me.”
● The 5 simple ways you can pull yourself into any moment and be present.
Links & Resources:
● Show notes: theparentingjunkie.com/5
● The Top Five Regrets of the Dying: A Life Transformed by the Dearly Departing by Bronnie Ware
● Sponsorship: theparentingjunkie.com/design
● Parent in Love Course: theparentingjunkie.com/parentinlove
● Facebook Community: theparentingjunkie.com/loveparenting
●
- Show Notes: theparentingjunkie.com/3
- Sponsorship: theparentingjunkie.com/tantrums
- Empathic Limits Course: theparentingjunkie.com/empathiclimits/
Links & Resources:
- Show notes at TheParentingJunkie.com/2
- Show #1: TheParentingJunkie.com/1
- Video about bedtime routines https://youtu.be/UR5u5d4YVew
- Video about allowance & chores: https://youtu.be/36NOM0FAhbc
Do you ever wonder how some people make it look so easy and seem to “do it all?” They homeschool their kids while also growing a business. They’re highly productive, yet spend time with their loved ones and are fully present and engaged.
People often ask me how I do it all; run a business, homeschool my children, take care of our home, take care of myself, my spouse, etc. In this episode we’re going to dive into the topic of how I do it all.
First, it’s important to dispel the myth that any of us can do everything.
- You can do anything, but you can’t do everything.
- I believe in doing all of the IMPORTANT things, then outsourcing, reducing, and/or eliminating the rest.
- I believe in working and taking action and accomplishing things, but I don’t believe in busyness.
How to do it all:
- **Don’t do it all!
Get help! Get as much help as you can. As your situation allows, outsource things that other people can do to enable you to do the things that only you can do. Outsource things you don’t enjoy doing. Things that take you away from things that bring you joy and fulfillment.
It takes a village! You need other people in your life. There are people who will help for free. Drop your kids off to play with your friend’s kids so you can run some errands. There are people who’d love to come play with your kids so you could take a break or work on some other things.**
- Multi-task.
It’s not for everyone for every time. In caregiving times and other times when I need to be present and engaged, I’m not multitasking. But while I’m driving, walking, or doing other things that are autonomous where you could be listening to audio books, podcasts, etc.
- Routine & rhythm.
We have a predictable weekly and daily flow. It drastically cuts down on power struggles throughout the day (getting out the door, meal times, getting to bed, etc). And because it’s so predictable, I have blocks of time where I know I can get my work done and schedule in my self-care.
- Declutter like your life depends on it...because it does.
Declutter both physically (in your home, office, etc) and in terms of your time/schedule. There are many things that don’t happen in this season in my life: I don’t answer every email, I pursue every project that comes along, and I say no to a lot of things.
Everything that comes into your home and schedule needs to earn it’s place. It needs to be deserving of the energy it takes.
If there are things in our home that aren’t serving us, that are adding to the clutter, I get rid of them.
If there are relationships that are draining and not bringing me joy, I let them slip away.
This helps me bring my full energy and enthusiasm to the things that I’m doing and keeping in my life.
I don’t watch much TV (maybe 45 min a week). I don’t go out much. I try very hard to reduce or eliminate mindless scrolling on social media.
- Supreme self-care.
If you want to bring your best to everything you do, you need to take care of yourself. Our bodies and minds need time to rest and rejuvenate. Running yourself ragged is a recipe for burnout and depression.
Once you feel rested, nourished, and taken care of, then everything else flows and you can give in a way that is never a sacrifice. It just flows from you naturally.
There will be days that are hard and you’ll fall into a victim mindset. But you’re responsible for your own self-care and well-being, and when you take care of yourself, the bad days will be few and far between instead of normal.
You need to stop putting yourself last. Stop putting everything and everyone else before your own well-being. When you leave your self-care for last, there’s never enough time and energy. Start making self-care a priority and schedule it in first. Then take care of others with whatever time and energy is left.
I would love to hear what you’re saying “no” to so that you can say “yes” to self-care. Take a screenshot of this podcast episode and tag me on Instagram. Tag me (@parentingjunkie) and use the hashtag #parentingjunkie, and let me know what you’re doing to reclaim self-care.
One final tip: Focus on being relentlessly optimistic! Focus on gratitude, abundance, and resilience. See challenges and problems as opportunities to grow; rather than being something done to me, they’re opportunities for me.
Links & Resources:
- Show notes at TheParentingJunkie.com/1
- Note: You mentioned bluetooth earbuds. Do you want to include a link to them? Do you have an amazon affiliate account (or whatever it’s called) where you can get a small commission on the sale of anything purchase from your links?
- Note: You mentioned they can listen to episode 2 to get an outline of your weekly/daily routines. Link to episode 2? TheParentingJunkie.com/2
- Sponsorship: TheParentingJunkie.com/design
TheParentingJunkie.com/review
Do you struggle with feeling like you’re not good enough, or that you don’t measure up? There are so many different parenting philosophies out there: Attachment, RIE, simplicity, unconditional, Montessori, Waldorf, Reggio, gentle, respectful, conscious, peaceful…but which one is right for you?
Join me as I dive into this topic and reveal my parenting philosophy.
The problem:
- Every book, expert, & philosophy seems to contradict the others.
- It can make you feel like you don’t measure up when you can’t or don’t 100% follow a particular philosophy.
- Some of these groups can be so judgmental and unsupportive when you don’t fully stick to their philosophy.
- There’s so much out there and it’s hard to decide what will work for you.
The solution (and my philosophy):
Love parenting and parent from love.
- Love Parenting
-
- Parenting should be enjoyable.
- We should feel good about the way that we parent.
- No one benefits from you being a martyr (including your children).
- Not that it’s always easy. There are definitely hard times in parenting. But overall, you should not parent in a way that feels like constant suffering & misery.
- Design a life that you love.
- You could go through your entire life…many people have and are currently doing so…not enjoying life.
- Keep your cup full and spill out onto others.
- What would make parenting fun for you? Minimize/reduce/outsource as many of the negative things as possible.
- Parent from Love
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- When you’re truly motivated from a place of love & care, you’ll find the right words & actions (vs. operating out of fear or anger).
- Holding your goodness to light. Self-compassion. Do things that are kind. Trust your intuition. Break down old paradigms.
- Keep it flexible enough and use as a clear guideline. It liberates you from attachment parenting or from mainstream parenting. PERMISSION to LOVE parenting, permission to parent from LOVE.
Links & Resources:
- Show notes at TheParentingJunkie.com/00
- TheParentingJunkie.com/review
- TheParentingJunkie.com/partners
- TheParentingJunkie.com/loveparenting (FB Group)