Finding You: An Evoke Therapy Podcast: Recent Episodes
Dr. Brad Reedy
Evoke Therapy Programs is an experientially based therapeutic program serving adolescents, young adults, parents, couples, and families. Email the host brad@evoketherapy.com
Dr. Reedy talks about what it means to hold space for another, what gets in the way of doing so and how this impacts the development of a child or the client in therapy. He explains that seeing someone is the key to mental health and resiliency and that the foundation of our ability to do that is in how we have managed to heal our own narcissistic wounding (the wounding of not being seen and accepted as we are).
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience on parenting and boundaries. He explains how compassion is born by our boundaries. He explains that children and partners will inevitably require us to face aspects of ourselves we have avoided. We will have to fail, come up short and own our limitations as we practice self-care and attempt to meet our loved ones with love and compassion.
Dr. Reedy defines and discusses what makes for emotional safety. He talks about how emotional safety heals us and how repeated exposure to an emotional safe person changes our nervous system permanently. He explains that when the “big people” from our childhood were unable to sit with us and our feelings, we learned to hide and protect ourselves… and these efforts to protect ourselves become our mental illnesses.
Dr. Reedy discusses how skills and tools don’t make up the transformative substance of our therapy journey. He talks about a “transformation of consciousness” that occurs when we are deeply changed. He explains ego-death and how fear and love are the primary forces that drive our behavior. He explains that therapy is not about improvement but rather about self-compassion, increased consciousness, and rests on a foundation of sense of safety.
Dr. Reedy discusses how the identified patient is someone who expresses the issues with a system through mental health symptoms. He talks about projection and triangulation as ways for individuals in a system to scapegoat others and avoid the responsibility that each member of a system bears. He talks about how we can become a part of the solution as we learn to see mental health issues in the context of the greater system and make changes to disrupt patterns. He discourages the use of shame and guilt as barometers of our progress on our mental health journey.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience on attachment, parenting, and relationships. He talks about how a parent’s self-acceptance, which leads to self-awareness, is the key to your children's healthy development. He explains that self-compassion is the key to greater awareness and consciousness. And he talks about how boundaries and skills are really the evidence or signposts that reveal where we are on our journey. He emphatically points out that the goal in therapy is not to be so good we are beyond reproach, but rather the outcome of therapy is learning to love and see our "horrible, rotten, human, fallible, lovable, selves."
Dr. Reedy discusses what to do when you are the only one in your circle doing their therapy work. He talks about how therapy changes us and how we can get stuck in trying to change the people around us..
Dr. Reedy discusses his first book, The Journey of the Heroic Parent and how his work has evolved since then. He describes the goal of the book as one to help parents become their own expert by learning how to think differently about parenting. He emphatically invites parents to do their own work and to explore their own histories, their own psychology.
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In this Ask Me Anything episode, Dr. Reedy takes questions from the audience on topics ranging from how we communicate our energy to our children, making the unconscious – conscious, debunking the cause and effect thinking, and how small-t trauma is insidious. He answers a question on shadow work. And he talks about how to handle the mistakes we have made as parents when our children remain angry.
In this episode, Dr. Reedy discusses how so many clients are coming to therapy with great worries and distress due to the tumultuous events in the world. He suggests that we need to become more discerning with the news we consume. He proposes that peace is found by focusing on what we can control. He talks about the Buddhist concepts of impermanence, radical acceptance, and mindfulness.
In this episode, Dr. Reedy discusses religious trauma and what kinds of family systems are at the greatest risk. He distinguishes religion from moral development and spiritual development. He talks about how families with dogmatic, strict-father-styles use religion to control, intimidate, and mold their children. He discusses how religion can be used as a defense against the experience of God and how religion can prevent spiritual development. He discusses the function of religion within a spiritual life. He talks about how many clients come to therapy with a history of religious trauma.
Dr. Brad Reedy welcomes Noah Rasheta, host of the Secular Buddhism Podcast. Noah is a philosopher, author, and host of a podcast on Secular Buddhism, where he shares Buddhist teachings & concepts for everyday life. He shares practical, accessible skills and concepts to help people incorporate Buddhist teachings into their life in an attempt to reduce unnecessary suffering. In this episode, Noah discusses his favorite principles from Buddhism and how we can think about enlightenment. He shares his personal journey and provides listeners an overview of the goals and objectives of the practice of Buddhism.
In this episode I am so pleased to welcome Ian Morgan Cron to the podcast. While he wears many hats, as he shares in this episode, the fundamental nature of his work is a spiritual one. Ian is Bestselling Author, Enneagram Expert, Priest, and the host of the Typology Podcast. After many years in recovery and in the wake of a relapse, he released his most recent book, The Fix. In it, he reveals how the twelve wteps can be key for anyone who wants to take their life back. Richard Rohr says about his newest book, “Ian Cron’s generous and hard-earned wisdom reveals that the Twelve Steps are not just for alcoholics and addicts, but a path to a profound transformation of Self for everyone.” In the this interview we cover a wide variety of topics including God and family, making an amends, how his various roles overlap and complement each other, his experience with shame (in real-time), and how he leans into his personal story to inform his work and hopefully make himself useful to the people he loves and serves.
Dr. Reedy takes questions on topics from the audience. He discusses what to do when our adult children seem to be going off course. He talks about how we can learn to be our most authentic self and how to protect that journey by the company we keep.
Dr. Reedy explains communication theory and the deeper psychological principles required for connection. He warns against using communication skills to change others and emphasizes that such skills can improve self-awareness first. They can also help us to remember to own our feelings (they are ours). He talks about listening and how it requires a significant amount of psychic energy.
Dr. Reedy talks about how humans cope with the anxiety of uncertainty and ambiguity. He explains that if we seek for security and absolute answers, we move towards mental illness. But if we can embrace the mystery of this life, we become more human and in that lies our resiliency.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience on parenting and relationships. He talks about the difference between caring and wanting someone to know you care. He explores the nuances of loving and caring for yourself and loving and caring for your partner.
Dr. Reedy explains the origins and function of resistance and defensiveness. He talks about how we can make it worse as parents, therapists, and spouses.
Dr. Reedy describes various forms of experiential therapy, including psychodrama - the primary type of therapy used in Finding You Programs’ Intensives. He explains why they work on the unconscious aspects of the psyche, and how healing can be accelerated with an experiential approach. He explains how experiential therapy bypasses resistance. He also explains how any therapy can be reparative and a “re-experiencing” of ourselves.
Dr. Reedy discusses Jung's concept of the Shadow, how to recognize it, and how to integrate it. He explains how this brings peace and freedom and lays the foundation for greater intimacy.
Dr. Reedy discusses how therapists and their clients can benefit from the therapist goin to therapy. He empowers clients to ask their therapists about their participation in therapy. He also explains the parallels between the client’s and the therapist’s resistance to therapy are mirror images of each other.
Dr. Reedy discusses the relationship principles that transcend through all relationships. He talks about how becoming who you are forms the basis for greater connection to others. He addresses the line between “can’t” and “won’t” when it comes to our children.
Dr. Reedy discusses Finding You’s method of therapy. Informed by psychoanalysis, this therapy is a way of being with people in such a fundamentally different way that the clients re-experiences themselves. He suggests that safety is the treatment and as the therapist is able to hold the client in patience, compassion, and non-judgment, the client is able to explore their untold stories.
Dr. Reedy discusses what to look for in a therapist. He also explores the pros and cons of individual work vs family work in therapy. He discusses the genetics and the trauma of our issues. He answers a question on making amends to our family members.
Dr. Reedy discusses explains complicated and complex grief in the wake of the LA fires. He talks about how no two people are grieving the same thing in the same way. He talks about how when others can’t sit with us in our pain, we feel shameful and inadequate. Conversely, when people can hold our feelings, we can learn to feel and sit with them, and they move through us. He explains that our relationship to grief is our relationship to life. And the pain of our lives doesn’t shrink, we get larger and more capable of holding it.
Dr. Reedy discusses how we may feel humiliated when the distance between the false self and real self is exposed. Most often, the real self is exposed when we encounter difficulties or failures. He explains that the narcissistic wound, the wound of not being seen, of not having our whole self (in contrast to the “good” self) is rarely addressed without failures and humiliation. He explain that defenses don’t feel like defenses from the inside – they feel like, “they don’t understand me.”
Dr. Reedy discusses the challenges and keys to creating intimacy. He explores how, when we don’t own our feelings, our histories, or our issues, we see problems "out there" – specifically in our partners. He explains how sharing your feelings are only one part of intimacy. Listening, with compassion and non-judgment is often the real challenge that prevents intimacy in couples.
Dr. Reedy discusses goals and how our goals change as we change. He discussed the difference between first order change (behavior, skills, tools) vs. second order change (a fundamentally different way of seeing the world and relating to it). He suggests that we ask different questions, bigger questions, to get unstuck from old patterns. The great task is to look critically into our programming and challenge the answers to the largest questions in life.
Dr. Reedy reviews Alice Miller’s, "The Drama of the Gifted Child." He touts this book as the most important book written on the subject of the parent-child dynamic. Miller explains how a child will give up who they are to meet the parent’s needs. The call is to do the deep work necessary to “cut the tragic link between admiration and love.”
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience on setting boundaries in relationships where that hasn’t been the practice. He explains that we will get better as we go. He explains that the ability to listen to a feeling or a boundary says more about the receiver than it does about the person sharing.
Dr. Reedy discusses boundaries and self-care and how guilt, shame, and fear must be dealt with in order to love yourself. He explains how boundaries are beyond right and wrong. He explains how love of self is the foundation for loving everyone else.
Dr. Reedy discusses regression and what triggers it. He explains that old contexts, old relationships, old energies, roles, or rules can trigger us in ways that we revert back to a less evolved way of functioning. He encourages observing this dynamic and developing compassion for ourselves when we experience this inevitability.
Dr. Reedy talks about the characteristics of an authentic apology. He explains the difference between an apology and an amends. He explains that forgiveness is not a future but something we can do when we can do it - we do it when we can so that we can feel better.
Dr. Reedy explores the pressures and dilemmas that many people grapple with over the holidays. He talks about why we feel obligated to show up to our old context is certain ways. He talks about observing ourselves when we visit family and how to develop a practice of self-compassion for our regression.
Dr. Reedy discusses the risk of practicing gratitude and proposes that a more effective route might be by learning to feel all our feelings. He explains toxic positivity, gaslighting and spiritual bypass. He talks about Thanksgiving and the pressure to feel a certain way and what to do about that.
Dr. Reedy discusses why personal work is the basis for all our relationship issues and challenges. He takes live questions from the audience on psychedelics, religion, children using marijuana, and how to respond to these issues.
Dr. Reedy explains the etiology of narcissism and how we all have some of it. He defines the narcissistic wound as the wound of not being seen. He debunks many ideas taught today in pop-psychology. He makes a plea to stop responding to the diagnosis intuitively, but with a deeper understanding we can help others and take-in less of the pain the narcissist tries to project on or into us.
Dr. Reedy explores the process of projection, starting with splitting-off the parts of ourselves we were told were unacceptable and relegating them to the unconscious – the shadow. He talks about how we want the problem to be out there, in the other. He talks about othering when we don’t own our own feelings of fear, insecurity, or overwhelm.
Dr. Reedy discusses the difference between trying to be right or good and being yourself. He discusses how the things we have been taught to fear often hold great wisdom or energy. He explains that if we are operating with the need to be good, driven by ego, we are incapable of love. He explains that when we come to terms with who we are, through self-compassion (by time spent with someone who sees us and doesn’t judge us), we are free to love and hold space for others and their feelings.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience and discusses how to hold boundaries without sacrificing the relationship. He discusses how to honor your feelings of betrayal while staying in relationship to the other. He explains the benefit of group work at Finding You Intensives.
Dr. Reedy announces his new project, Finding You Therapy Programs. Providing Therapy Intensives, Coaching, and On-line Workshops for parents, couples, and therapists, Brad explains the underlying philosophy of Finding You. Based in Attachment Theory, he explains how the goal is to draw closer to your authentic self. From here, relationships and difficult life decisions come into focus; anxiety is replaced with hope and empowerment.
In his last broadcast representing Evoke Therapy Programs, Dr. Reedy shares both his personal connection to the hero’s journey as well as how understanding stories, art, music, literature, and nature draw us back to the one idea that the purpose of life is your life. The goal in Dr. Reedy’s therapy is to become who you are, to become your authentic self. Dr. Reedy says goodbye and takes time to read as live participants share their heroic stories in the chat. And he says goodbye with the invitation to join him on the next journey, Finding You Therapy Programs.
Dr. Reedy discusses the foundations of healthy family dynamics. He talks about how the identified patient becomes the scapegoat for other family members’ undone work.
Dr. Reedy discusses attachment based therapy and how repairs to our attachment wounding can be made through the relationship with the therapist.
Morgan Foster is not only a seasoned divorce attorney with more than 20 years of experience, but she’s also the visionary founder of The Pivot Process—a groundbreaking approach that transforms the often painful process of divorce into an opportunity for growth, healing, and new beginnings.Morgan has spent a decade handling complex divorce and custody cases. She has seen firsthand the toll that traditional divorce can take on families. This inspired her to create The Pivot Process, a holistic and empowering method that helps individuals and families navigate the emotional, financial, and relational challenges of divorce with dignity and clarity.
Dr. Reedy discusses Nature-Based Therapy. He explains boundaries and how such an intervention can trigger feelings of betrayal. He talks about grit, growth mindset, the comfort crisis and why therapy set in nature can be so powerful.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the live audience on parental self-care, boundaries, and the guilt that comes as we heal and progress.
Dr. Reedy discusses shame and guilt and how they work in our lives. He suggests that becoming healthier, making progress, and healing will inevitably require that we confront our guilt. He also makes it clear that guilt (and shame) are synonymous with morality.
Dr. Reedy discusses narcissism, the narcissistic wound, what distinguishes the diagnosis vs. traits, and how narcissism can be treated effectively.
Dr. Reedy explores the definition and origins of Codependency. He explains that the root of codependency is the way parents and other big people talk to and respond to the child. Codependency is a modern term that encompasses anxious attachment styles. He explains that codependency is NOT the cause of addiction in another but rather is at the core of all addictions. He teaches that healing codependency does not cure another person’s addiction but only resolves the codependency in the individual who is healing.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from audience members on the how to respond to a child that won’t open up and when it is okay to take a vacation from the work in therapy.
Dr. Reedy talks about how aftercare is the key to a successful treatment intervention. He also talks about the pitfalls and vulnerabilities we encounter during any transition.
Largely drawing from the book with the same name by Thich Nhat Hanh, Dr. Reedy explains mindfulness as a boarder idea than what people think of when considering mindfulness. He explains how therapy is a “talking mindfulness” practice. He explains several tenants on Buddhism including impermanence, non-duality, inter-being, and radical acceptance. He also clarifies that what Buddhists refer to as the concept of “non-attachment” is synonymous with the characteristic in psychology associated with a secure attachment.
Dr. Reedy talks about how when we accept ourselves and are able to see who we are, we are able to move forward. Conversely, thinking of mental health in terms of being completely free of our issues is a breeding ground for denial. He talks about how guilt and shame are at the crux of so many of our dilemmas. He explains attachment theory and how it is thought of in the therapeutic relationship. He explains how we listen when we can and it is absolutely okay to set a boundary and remove ourselves from the conversation when we can’t listen to others.
Dr. Reedy welcomes Esin Pinarli to the podcast, Esin is a psychotherapist, licensed clinical social worker (LCSW), and a Master’s Level Certified Addiction Professional (MCAP) specializing in IMAGO, brainspotting, Internal Family Systems (IFS), Somatic practices, and psychodrama. Through an integrative experiential approach, she helps individuals, couples, and families suffering from anxiety, depression, addiction, codependency, trauma, dysfunctional family system dynamics, and relational attachment issues to navigate life's challenges so they can become fully alive, supported, and whole.They cover topics ranging from Internal Family Systems, the intersection between clinical work and the 12-Steps, codependency, and self-care.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience. He discusses the challenges when a spouse doesn’t want to go to therapy. He explores the dynamics in our culture around expectations of mothers and how guilt can be the barrier to improved mental health. And he further explains how the suicidal impulse can be a call to a higher level of consciousness.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience. He talks about why children take risks on their devices and on social media. He talks about when we take care of ourselves, we can be there for those we love. He talks about how we may need to set strong boundaries with our parents if engaging eth them reaches a certain level of toxicity.
Dr. Reedy discusses ego and soul and explains how these two ideas represent two primary driving energies. Ego, he explains, is the part of us than manages and represents the conscious mind. Defenses, the need to be right, and gatekeeping the unconscious material are its primary roles or duties. Ego is fear based and operates withing a scarcity mindset. Soul is the whole, authentic, or real self- it is our whole self. It is our wisest knowing, and it is fueled by love – love for self and others.
Dr. Reedy discusses the challenges of co-parenting. He explains how to avoid making things worse. He emphasizes that we “stay on our side of the street” and not become overly focused on the other’s shortcomings.
Dr. Reedy discusses attachment, what it takes to provide a secure attachment, and what to consider to prioritize a secure attachment over behavior or symptom management.
Dr. Reedy explains how love and fear are driving forces in our unconscious, motivating much of our behavior. He explains that we need to learn to distinguish between love and fear and understand when we are taking from others and when and how we can show our love to our children and partners.
Dr. Reedy discusses Evoke’s custom private intensives for couples and families. He explains what make Evoke’s Intensive work different and how we aim to be the experts, not on your life, but on creating a process where you can discover your truth.
Dr. Reedy discusses what sets Evoke Therapy Intensives apart from other programs. He explains the clinical model and explains how Evoke uses attachment and the concepts of transference and counter transference.
Dr. Reedy takes questions from the audience on what to do if doing your own work and apologizing to your children doesn’t make a difference.
From an article by Melissa Corkum and Lisa Qualls, Dr. Reedy discusses what happens when the chronic stress from children struggling with mental health issues bring parents to a point of numbness, disconnection, and shame. He talks about the isolation and shame that comes when a parent loses their ability to feel warmth and love for a struggling child. Dr. Reedy talks about this dynamic in the context of attachment, parental guilt, and self-care. Full article here: https://thearchibaldproject.com/blocked-care-how-to-regain-compassion-for-yourself-and-your-child
Dr. Reedy talks takes live questions from the audience and talks about self-care in the context of the child parent dynamic. He talks about looking for a therapist that is patient, kind, and secure. He explains attachment-based therapy and the upcoming Master Class and how the medicine in therapy is the way the therapist is with the client.
Dr. Reedy talks about communication skills and how “why” we share is more important than the words we use.
Dr. Reedy take live questions from the audience. He discusses how to deal with an angry, resentful child. He also talks about what can happen when one spouse doesn’t want to do their therapy work.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience on the process of wilderness therapy, how to support a family member in treatment, the new book "Bad Therapy," and how to model the change you want to see in your children.
Dr. Reedy talks about how myth and stories provide a template for the heroic journey inward to discover ourselves. He uses this idea to show that our stories and out myths are invitations to look at the lost parts of ourselves so that we can heal and become who we are.
Dr. Reedy answers a question about finding hope and worth after an affair. He talks about how to make a repair with a child who doesn’t want to engage anymore. He explains that our context can be internalized and the way to healing is to spend time with a patient, empathic Other.
Dr. Reedy talks about what to look for in a therapist. He talks about how to recognize a mature therapist who is capable of holding you with compassion and patience. He explains that "the way a therapist is with you" is the medicine. He talks about characteristics of the adequate or "good enough" therapist. He emphasizes that the therapist must first model being human since that is the task in therapy. He explains that if the therapist can hold your anger, frustration, and resistance with love, you have found a therapist worth keeping.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience. He talks about defenses, where and why they happen, what it feels like when we encounter the defense in ourselves or the Other, and what healing looks like so we don’t need the protection of the defense.
Dr. Reedy provide an overview of The Eden Project by James Hollis. He explains how the early stages of romantic love are fraught with pitfalls of projection, blame, and the working out of the unconscious, unexplored parts of ourselves. He talks about the responsibility to live our own life and cease abdicating our chief responsibility – to individuate and become more whole, more conscious as the pathway to greater intimacy and love in marriage.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience on loving our children when they are hurting themselves and on finding the right kind of therapist for ourselves.
Dr. Reedy talks about the value and limitations of skill-based work and therapy. He talks about how the development of the self is the foundation for deeper change and how that can be accomplished. He posits that the outcome of therapy is that we become who we are.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience. He discusses that the work isn’t always about learning to put up with more and more, but may be setting boundaries with people in your life. He explains that the primary barriers to higher enlightenment are shame and guilt. He says that the dominant cultures offers erroneous ideas on the subject of becoming and person and loving others. Dr. Reedy explains that enlightenment means that we deal with the parts of ourselves we avoid.
Dr. Reedy discusses Al-anon, Codependency, and how the 12-Steps apply to the non-identified patient. He defines codependency and talks about its connection to attachment and the attachment wound we suffered. He goes through each of the 12 Steps and ties them back to the principles they address. He debunks the excuses people have when resisting attending meetings for themselves.
Dr. Reedy discuss the shadow and how the repressed energy of our unconscious impacts our behaviors and relationships. He talks about how to recognize the shadow and how to unpack and heal so that we don’t ask our children and our partners to carry our unconscious, undone work.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience on dealing with children who fight, co-parenting, and learning how to love. He explains that before we try to eradicate behaviors in our children, we learn to listen to them to hear the untold story of the child’s dilemma.
Dr. Reedy discusses repairing relationships in the context of attachment. He emphasizes that repair, forgiveness and reconciliation come on the terms and the timeline of the person who was hurt. He talks about the ego and how we need to let it die to mature and grow.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience on parenting older children: what is different and what is the same. He talks about what boundaries sound like and how the measure of a good boundary is not in how the child or other person responds.
Dr. Reedy explores the problems with setting goals and measuring our progress. He explains that goals often need to be altered, surrendered, and discarded. He gives a list of goals that relate to being and growing in contrast to goals which point towards arriving.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from audience members who have tried everything, and they are still not able to reach their child. He talks about the goals of healthy parenting: peace, confidence, clarity…he also explains how the goal in therapy is not to become “better,” but to become yourself.
Dr. Reedy explains various models of human development and how they lead to a more compassionate understanding of mental illness in our children. He explains how parents are often going through a parallel process with their children of individuation and identity development.
Dr. Reedy discusses school refusal. He considers behavioral modification 9in the context of what we know about trauma informed approaches. He encourages parents to be flexible and look for the root issues when dealing with school refusal.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience. He talks about staying connected to yourself and how our anger and resentment are signals to set better boundaries. The talks about how parents must put themselves first if they are to love and compassionately care for their children and others.
Dr. Brad Reedy welcomes Parent Coach Andy Goldstrom to the podcast. From a career in business, to a journey supporting a child struggling with mental health issues, Andy brings his passion for helping parents find the tools and empowerment they are looking for while navigating a family's journey towards mental health. Go to www.parentsjourneycoaching.net for more on his work and www.oplm.com and www.skysthelimitfund.org for more information on donations.
Dr. Reedy talks about principles involved in discovering and setting healthy boundaries. He explains that boundaries are synonymous with - or come out of - self-care. He warns against trying to explain your boundaries and using boundaries to change other people.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions on difficult parenting issues. He talks about learning what is inside of our control and how to face life threatening dilemmas with our children. He talks about understanding the boundaries between self and others and unlearning what we learned about love and life as a way towards greater enlightenment.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience on setting boundaries with our parents when our parents are toxic. He talks about how to motivate others to enter treatment and accepting what is outside of our control.
Dr. Reedy talks about the shift that occurs when parents turn inward. He talks about how parents can model vulnerability and accountability. He uses communication skills to illustrate that the work of healing is to take responsibility for your own life. He explains that what happened to us as children is not our fault but how dealing with it and healing from it is our responsibility.
Dr. Reedy takes questions from the live audience on how to effectively encourage those we love to seek treatment. He explains that resistance is a threat response, and the primary objective is to create safety. He explains how curiosity replaces judgment and he explains how and why a sense of self and boundaries must be at the foundation of anything we do with those we love. He gives the audience an assignment to apologize to the identified patient as a starting point for creating safety.
Dr. Reedy discusses the relationship between attachment (secure or anxious) and trauma. He explains that how we relate to our children - focusing on our nervous system regulation, our personal trauma histories, and how well we “see” and provide safety for our children, the more we can minimize the effects of traumatic events. He explains how exposure to a regulated and healed parent can foster resiliency in our children.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience. He talks about how to create safety while still holding boundaries. He explores how to set boundaries without judgement.
Dr. Reedy discuses Evoke’s perspective on Behavioral Contracts. He talks about why they don’t work and now attachment is more important that managing behavior. He talks about how the key is for parents to use such tools to get clear on their boundaries and focus on their own relapse and regression.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience on parental alienation and how much is ideal for the kids know about the other parent’s responsibility for divorce. He talks about the outcome of doing your work: unlearning and becoming a larger person. He explains how boundaries are for self-care and not for changing the child or other person.
Dr. Reedy discusses the tasks in building a strong and healthy marriage. The talks about the critical do’s and don’ts in co-parenting.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions on setting boundaries with parents, dealing with a child with Borderline Personality Traits, and helping children resolve difficult feelings.
Dr. Reedy talks about the diagnosis of PTSD, C-PTSD and trauma in general. He talks about small and big “T” traumas. He talks about how resiliency is tied to how well a parent sorts out their childhood and how it this is the greatest predictor of the quality of attachment that can mitigate trauma in a child.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from audience members on dating in sobriety, the relationship among guilt/shame/regret/and a humble apology. He talks about the necessity of doing your own work and how not doing it asks your children (and partner) to carry your burden for you.
Dr. Reedy discusses accountability. He explains the best way to teach accountability is to model it to our children. He talks about why parents are challenged with modeling this and how guilt blocks our ability to own up to our part in things.
Dr. Reedy explores the distinctions between and boundary and a consequence. He also talks about showing up with humility and not taking on shame for triggering our children. He talks about the difference between trying to get it right and being yourself.
Dr. Reedy explores recovery and how it is supported in the wilderness. He explains the underlying principles of psychology embedded in the 12-Steps and talks about how surrender is a necessary starting point for change.
Dr. Reedy explores the difference between enabling and authentic behavior in parenting. He also talks about letting go vs. trying to control what others feel, think, and do. He explains how guilt and shame must be dealt with on our path towards greater mental health.
Dr. Reedy explains attachment theory and how a secure attachment creates resiliency. He reads the children's book, "You Are Special" by Max Lucado to illustrate how a secure attachment is earned and how it helps us to see ourselves as whole and not needing external validation.
Dr. Reedy discusses what makes Evoke’s Coaching program unique. He explores what to look for in a coach or a therapist. He also explores the process of therapy/coaching and how it promotes growth and mental health.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions for the audience on questions of the role of medication, nature vs. nurture, epigenetics, and when is a boundary a boundary or when is it manipulation.
Dr. Reedy travels back in time to present a parent seminar he would present for parents visiting their children for the first time in months. From 1996 to 2010, Dr. Reedy would teach this meeting focusing on letting go, communication styles and assertive communication, and the Cycle of Wholeness (as a basic model for therapy). He provides this updated version to share the information and his current perspective on the skills presented.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience and discusses the challenges and the support needed when parenting children who struggle with mental health issues and addiction. He talks about how diagnoses help therapists understand the style of the person's defenses, but that the real task is to find the individual story that explains the symptoms.
Dr. Reedy takes questions on various topics from the live audience. He talks about how to respond when children regress or relapse into old behaviors. He talks about not trying to control how the child feels and how letting them feel helps them to move through and let go of emotions.
Dr. Reedy discusses the proliferation of 30-day, short term programs that are covered by insurance. He talks about the need for longer lengths of stays for best outcomes. He also talks about he unique aspects of wilderness therapy’s experiential approach and how it helps to bypass resistance. He explains that short term programs appeal to families due to their lower cost and shorter length of stay and how these aspects, while attractive, may not be the most effective and lowest cost for treatment in the end.
Dr. Reedy take questions from the audience on where to set boundaries with your children. He explains the similarities and differences between the relationship of parent and child versus our other relationships. He talks about attachment-based therapy and how a person develops (or doesn’t) into an authentic and real self.
Dr. Reedy talks about the wound of abandonment. He talks about the different ways that we can abandon our children and how it’s not really accurate to talk about our children abandoning us. He talks about the benefit of studying parenting and child development from our perspective as children. He explains the need for us to take care of ourselves and come to terms with our “horrible, rotten selves” in order to be available to love more.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience on attachment from a distance, supporting your child over your family of origin, when sharing feelings becomes manipulative, and the advantages and disadvantages of a stepparent’s perspective.
Dr. Reedy discusses neurodiversity, Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD), and how to navigate relationships with those who process information differently than we do. He discusses the empathy and patience that arises when parents understand their children and the uniqueness of their neurology.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience on boundaries and pressure we experience from our family of origin. He talks about how we decide boundaries. He explains how “this is what I am comfortable with” is the strongest position one can take when setting boundaries.
Dr. Reedy describes the clinical criteria for depression and anxiety and goes beneath to explore the spiritual and psychological functions of mood disorders. He explains that our symptoms are messengers for an unexplored or unfinished task that we must attend to in order to alleviate our suffering.
Dr. Reedy takes questions from live audience members on a variety of topics including preparing for transitions, what it means to awaken, and specific language for setting boundaries.
Dr. Reedy discusses the intrapsychic benefits and the underlying value of communication skills as a template for a new way to understand yourself and your relationship to others. He discusses “I statements,” reflective listening and the barriers to both. He also offers tools and skills that families use who identify as having improved family relationships.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience. He discusses how to listen and empathize with children while still maintaining a boundary. He talks about defending yourself when your child is angry and how to understand personality disorders.
Dr. Reedy discusses how to engage a therapist to know if they are the right one for you. He talks about the difference between therapists that have done and are doing their own work versus those who rely on technique and academics. He encourages clients to ask tough questions and expect intelligent answers. He explains how therapy can trigger a regressive position and invites clients to share their frustrations and feelings toward the therapist to see whether the therapist is capable. He also explains how therapy is less about fixing you and your symptoms and more about understanding you and your dilemmas.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience. He replies to questions about how to handle a child's anger due to placement in a treatment program and finding the balance between listening and the boundaries that support self-care.
Dr. Reedy discusses how myths can teach us about ourselves. He explains Joseph Campbell’s Hero’s Journey and how the patterns in our stories and our myths provide a road map for living our authentic, human lives. He offers examples from movies and contemporary songwriters as well as classic mythology.
Dr. Reedy takes questions from the live audience on setting boundaries with a child who is abusive. He talks about tattoos, family systems-based approach to treatment, and how you can take responsibility for your own serenity.
Dr. Reedy explores what it means to “do your work.” He talks about the process of unlearning and liberating the self from the should and shouldn’t we unconsciously carry. He talks about what therapy looks like when the project is to become who we are.
Dr. Reedy takes live question from the audience on boundaries and parenting. He explains that there is no generic solution or advice when it comes to boundaries. Boundaries are synonymous with self-care and the discovery of the “right” boundary is essentially the discovery of the Slef.
Dr. Reedy discusses how setting boundaries will feel like a betrayal. He talks about the differentiation scale and how if we move up the scale, those left behind may experience our increased awareness and individuation as abandonment.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience. In this episode he emphasizes the need for parents to model their imperfections and humanity to children. He explains how parents teach accountability by owning their mistakes and how when we share our struggles, from a place of strength and confidence, we show children how to grow up.
Dr. Reedy discusses the pros and cons of transporting. He talks about how to respond to children who report being traumatized by being transported to treatment. He talks about allowing children to define their own trauma and letting go of trying to control what they feel and think.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience and talks about how healthy changes often feels wrong and those around use will not recognize it as healthy. He also talks about how, when we feel lost and the path seems darkest, to keep going – but we don’t have to do it alone. Therapists can walk beside us and help us carry some of the guilt.
Dr. Reedy discusses the role and impact of the field guide in wilderness therapy. He talks about the value of the mentor role, and how this role can be more impactful on young clients than that of the therapist. He also explains how the field guide is supported and trained to become capable facilitators in the therapeutic process.
Dr. Reedy answers question live on various topics like “How to apply lessons from wilderness therapy to home” and “How to confront children or others when we see something in their behavior where they are struggling.” He explains how to avoid confronting defenses and letting our advice or suggestion fail when the other person is not ready to hear it.
Dr. Reedy gives a glowing review of The Comfort Crisis. In his book, Michael Easter expounds on the scientific body of research which shows that humans thrive physically and psychologically through exercise, outdoor activities, and challenges which stress them to moderate degrees. He emphasizes primitive camping, exposure to nature’s harshness, and backpacking as the most effective ways to replicate what our ancestors did that helped them to survive and thrive as a species.
Dr. Reedy talks about marriage and couples. He explains how intimacy is painful, difficult, and requires us to so the work of facing our own issues. He explains how talking tends to be a taking thing and listening tends to be a giving thing. Dr. Reedy explains that the start of the marriage and our ideas and projections on it to give us all our childhood didn’t provide are the energies and issues that later become chasms.
Dr. Reedy takes live and pre-submitted questions from the audience and discusses how we can look beneath the behavioral problems of the child and look into what they are feeling. He also gives examples of how shifting our style from an emphasis on behavioral modification to relationship-connection can create a shift in the child’s life.
Dr. Reedy takes questions from Evoke's social media followers. He explains how children learn (compared to adults). He talks about how ego, the need to be good or right, is the great barrier to mental health. He also explains how children benefit when they, the parents, make their own anxiety their responsibility.
Dr. Reedy takes live and pre-submitted questions from the audience and discusses the cycle of shame that parents go through when their children give them feedback, or they become aware of their mistakes. He describes how tolerating feelings, what some refer to as an ego death, shows the child that we are a safe base in their lives.
Dr. Reedy explains the concept of boundaries: where they come from, what they are, and the barriers we have to setting them. He explains that surrender, choosing how to lose, is a key component in developing healthy boundaries.
Dr. Reedy takes live and pre-submitted questions from the audience on topics such as “How to help your co-parent,” “Should I allow my young adult to use THC while living and home,” and “How much should I tell my child about my own issues?”
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses one of the most invaluable tools in building connection with others: the ability to listen and hear what another person is saying without reaction, defense, justification, or retaliation.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from parents on the topics of the attachment, weather in the field, and navigating a loved one who doesn’t want to do their own work. He explains further how to support someone who is experiencing a lack of a will to go on and gives some great book recommendations!
Dr. Brad Reedy responds to and offers insight on the recent news that has come out regarding wilderness therapy and wilderness therapy alumni experiences.
Dr. Brad Reedy covers co-parenting. Whether divorced or married, couples can help their children by following some key guidelines such as: separating their need form the child's need, not parentifying the child, and focusing on one's own growth rather than the co-parent's, among many others.
Dr. Brad Reedy answers questions about how or if parents can help their "almost adults" see the effects of their actions on the family, how to know whether to bring a child directly home after wilderness or send them to another program, whether to do a family Intensive as a final step before a child returns home from treatment, and how best to support a sober child in danger of relapse, among others.
Dr. Reedy welcomes Evoke Therapy's Cori Wright. Cori works with adolescents and young adults in Evoke's Wilderness Therapy Program and she shares her journey into the field. She talks about the gift of regulating the nervous system using somatic experiencing and the outdoors. She explains how therapists set the stage for a client's healing through the process of co-regulation with the therapist via deep listening. She shares how becoming a mother has carved out deeper compassion and humility in her work with parents.
Dr. Brad Reedy talks about what the winter season is like for Evoke students: how they stay warm and healthy, how they mark the winter holidays, and how their varied emotions about not being home for the holidays can lead to important insights.
Dr. Brad Reedy took live questions regarding a son's self-sabotage, how to "be close with" your teenager, what to do when your child is engaged in illegal activity, and self-forgiveness.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses his habit of practicing mindfulness rather than gratitude. He shares how sometimes redirecting oneself to gratitude when one is feeling difficult feelings--looking on the bright side--can drift into toxic positivity or a denial/avoidance of uncomfortable feelings. Alternatively, when one is mindful, one can feel and manage the difficult feelings as they arrive--and then also naturally appreciate and feel grateful for life when things are going well. He also elaborates on his belief that the most important step to more contented living is self-care/self-compassion.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from parents on the topics of the guilt, shame and self-care. He explains how that in order to expand our skills as a parent, we need to let go of our guilt.
Dr. Brad Reedy details the immense growth and change going on in the young adult brain as well as their attendant behaviors. He then discusses Evoke's updated Young Adult program, which makes space for their growth and change employing expeditions, adventure, mindfulness, service, as well as a newly added therapeutic Intensive, among other activities.
Dr. Brad Reedy took questions about how to know when you have formed a secure attachment, how not to absorb your teen's moods, how to get in alignment with your spouse about parenting issues, and what codependency does--and doesn't--mean, among others.
Dr. Brad Reedy reviews, explains, and illustrates Evoke's Three Founding Principles: 1. Know Your Truth 2. Express Your Truth 3. Heal in Relationships
Dr. Brad Reedy answers live questions regarding what a relationship can look like with a fully adult child and how to regard the concept of boundaries as well as how to set effective ones, among others.
Dr. Brad Reedy discuses the concept of the Identified Patient. When a family focuses its efforts on saving, fixing, or helping one specific family member, that person becomes the Identified Patient. Once this person has been identified, it can absolve or in some way prevent the family from looking at their family system as a whole and each of themselves as individuals. This set-up can prevent or impede anyone in the family from doing the true growth work they need/want to do. Dr. Reedy talks about the history of this concept and how this dynamic can play out in families.
Dr. Brad Reedy took live questions. He spoke about learning how to be curious and non-judgmental in our reactions to our children, how to hold a boundary once it's been set, and the stages of a wilderness stay, among other things.
As autumn leaves drop from the trees, Dr. Brad Reedy talks about the changing seasons of our lives and how in order to grow, the biggest lesson we must learn is to let go. Tonight he specifically elucidates Key Three from the Three Keys to Enlightenment mentioned in his book, The Audacity to Be You.
Dr. Reedy took live questions about how best to create a healthy attachment with your child, how to navigate a client/therapist relationship, how to manage the financial stresses of sending your child to treatment, and whether birth order can determine parent/child enmeshment, among others.
Dr. Brad Reedy talks about how to handle your child turning 18 while away at treatment, i.e. meaning what to do if and when they exercise their legal ability to leave or "walk out" because they are now adults. Yet in an approach that will appeal to many more than just those in this specific circumstance, he discusses it through a lens focused on understanding and outgrowing codependency, not counting on outcomes, and setting boundaries that will reinforce your own self-care and mental health.
Dr. Reedy welcomes Dr. Gabor Maté to the podcast. A renowned speaker and bestselling author, Dr. Gabor Maté is highly sought after for his expertise on a range of topics including addiction, stress, and childhood development. Dr. Maté has written several bestselling books, including the award-winning In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction, When the Body Says No: Exploring the Stress-Disease Connection, and Scattered: How Attention Deficit Disorder Originates and What You Can Do About It, and has coauthored Hold On to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers. His works have been published internationally in nearly 30 languages. His new book, The Myth of Normal: Trauma, Illness, and Healing in a Toxic Culture, is in bookstores now.
Dr. Brad Reedy answers questions about how to balance taking care of self and others and shedding old notions about both, drug testing your child when they are living at home, how not to micromanage a child who has recently returned home from treatment, and others.
Dr. Brad Reedy starts his broadcast with the words: "If we talk about connection and intimacy, we must first talk about boundaries and individuation." What follows is a meditation on the importance of becoming a "Self," how boundaries actually foster intimacy, and how codependency kills it.
Dr. Reedy welcomes Educational Consultant and Parent Coach, Mary Warren to the broadcast. Mary and Brad discuss the challenges people face during transitions, specifically the challenges of moving from Wilderness Therapy to a Residential Treatment Program or Therapeutic Boarding School.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from parents on the topics of the shadow, when we feel overwhelmed by parenting, and how to create an emotionally space for someone while still maintaining our boundaries
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses some of the ways you can know whether your therapist is right for you--or not. He also explains how to think about and approach therapy in order to get the most out of it.
Dr. Brad Reedy answers questions about how to get over the guilt and shame of seeing your child wrestle with the same difficult issues you do, how to research and choose a therapeutic boarding school, and how or if to intervene when you know your child is engaging in risky behaviors. He also supports a parent who reports an abusive therapist and addresses another who wants to know how to authentically connect with her teenage son who has a potential personality disorder.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses the three types of therapeutic Intensives Evoke offers: Finding You, Finding Connection, and Finding Family. He elucidates Evoke's practice of Attachment-based therapy and how and why it helps. He also offers and in-depth description of each Intensive, as well as its benefits.
Dr. Brad Reedy addresses questions about what to do when you feel you've tried everything and your soon-to-be adult child rejects it all, how to proceed when your child "doesn't believe in boundaries," and finding balance between curiosity and consistency, among several others.
Dr. Brad Reedy talks about wilderness therapy and how it can be effective for struggling children and young adults--and their families. He covers how being in a therapeutic setting in the wilderness forces a digital detox, fosters grit and mindfulness, allows clients to play again, all while exposing them to positive mentoring and experiential therapy. Wilderness therapy is especially effective with resistant adolescents and allows kids to build self-esteem through tangible accomplishments. It removes the negative influences from home, allows individuation, and supports connections to things "greater than" or outside themselves like the group--and nature itself.
In a live Q&A parents asked questions about a child with a potentially devastating mental health diagnosis, the basics of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and how it might help, what to do when you are overwhelmed by guilt about the ways you have "dented" your children, and one parent reached out expressing fear and loneliness because her son's involvement in gangs has left her feeling like she has no parental peers in the treatment world.
Dr. Brad Reedy, recently back from vacation, speaks of lessons learned during his time off, through the lens of the works of Dr. James Hollis, a Jungian psychoanalyst. One of Dr. Reedy's opening quotes from Hollis's book The Middle Passage, perfectly previews this talk: "But such is the first [half of] adulthood: full of blunders, shyness, inhibitions, mistaken assumptions, and always, the silent rolling of the tapes of childhood. If one had not set forth and made those mistakes and crashed into those walls, then one would have remained a child. Reviewing one's life from the vantage point of the second half requires understanding and forgiveness of the inevitable crime of unconsciousness."
Dr. Brad Reedy interviews public school social worker and Evoke Intensives therapist and coach, Clement Wilson.
Evoke Intensives Clinical Director, Travis Slagle talks about the myth of being good, and how our need to be "good," bred into us from the earliest parts of our lives, can destroy our agency and authenticity. "It's better to be a Self, than to be 'good.'"
Dr. Brad Reedy talks with Casie Fariello, co-founder of Other Parents Like Me, a subscription-based online platform designed to support young people with mental health and substance abuse challenges.
Dr. Reedy takes questions from a live audience. He discusses how to hold boundaries and develop greater capacity for those we love. He explains how the foundation of compassion develops as we take care of ourselves and do what some might consider selfish.
Dr. Brad Reedy discuss the book No Bad Parts: Healing Trauma and Restoring Wholeness with the Internal Family Systems Model by Richard Schwartz, PhD. He covers Schwartz's writings on the parts of the self, the eight C's of Internal Family Systems, and other concepts elucidated in the book. Reedy ends with key takeaways from the work that overlap with Evoke's philosophy.
Dr. Brad Reedy answers questions about what to do when you discover your child might be into dangerous pastimes or behaviors, how to feel and contain your anger so you can then be a safe container for your child's feelings, and how to best support your child while they are in wilderness. He also addresses a parent who will be taking in a Ukrainian refugee, the value of somatic experiencing, and family visits to the wilderness, among others.
Dr. Brad Reedy did a short discussion of parental trauma, including how to think about it and some key take aways for handling it. He then invited parents to share their tough stories, to show everyone that they are never alone in their trials. Parents opened up about dilemmas that felt terrifying and unsolvable. They shared about overdoses, run aways, relapses, and seemingly intractable behavioral problems. The goal in this episode was not to troubleshoot and help parents solve their problems, but rather to model what truly seeing and hearing "the Other" as they vulnerably share looks and feels like.
Dr. Reedy welcomes Evoke Intensives therapist Noel Koons to the broadcast. Noel covers topics that ranger from Taoism to mindfulness to Fining Nemo as he explains how he helps clients move through difficult and painful emotions to find themselves and heal.
Dr. Brad Reedy answers questions about compassion vs. enabling, guilt, the nature of addiction, and co-dependency. He also talks about what to do when your therapist may not be the right fit, how much to share with your children about your own personal growth journey, and whether/what to tell a child's potential new school about their time in the wilderness.
Dr. Brad Reedy explains the Evoke Clinical Vision. He explains the Cycle of Health and Wholeness, what Experiential Therapy is, what Attachment Theory is, and why we base our care on it. He then walks through some memorable quotes that have important ways of thinking behind them. He finishes with the Three Keys and explains the Shame Cycle.
Dr. Brad Reedy answers questions about what he means when he refers to "the work," how to handle it when the work feels too hard, and what to do when your co-parent is not doing their work. He also answers questions about when one's child is ready to leave wilderness, whether and how Evoke supports spirituality/religion and its practice for its students, along with several other questions.
In this podcast, Dr. Brad Reedy talks about sex as it relates to parenting teens and young adults. He covers topics such as consent, promiscuity/sexual "acting out," sexual double standards for boys and girls, and how to walk the line between privacy and safety for a child who is under 18. He also makes the case that parents' attitudes/shame/hang ups about sex will have an impact on how their children feel about sex, how they talk about it, and how safe they feel opening up about it.
Dr. Brad Reedy took live questions about how therapy can help us, why and how wilderness therapy creates positive change, Evoke wilderness's different phases, and Evoke's parent mentoring program. He also addressed what to do when visiting an adult child with severe OCD, how to think about writing a will when you have a struggling child, and how to manage your own life and health when you have a child with multiple behavioral and mental health issues.
Evoke therapist Christian Snuffer joins the podcast and discusses his journey from wilderness therapy to the Evoke Intensive team. Christian discusses his integrative approach, including psychedelic assisted psychotherapy.
Dr. Brad Reedy explains the definitions of masculine and feminine energies and how they differ from the terms "sex" and "gender." He then goes on to discuss the qualities of each and how we are at our best when we accept and cultivate a balance of both within us. He also touches on toxic and healthy masculine and feminine traits.
Dr. Brad Reedy took live questions about what happens when a child goes directly home from wilderness, what to do when we wound our children, holding a boundary against marijuana in the home, and how to find the balance between being self-focused and others-focused, among many others.
Dr. Brad Reedy talks about the importance of parent work, both while their child is away at wilderness/treatment, but also as a routine practice. He shares, "Doing your own work isn’t about 'You caused it, you broke it, you gotta fix it.' Doing your own work is modeling for your child to do their work.” In this context he also discusses Family Walkabouts at Evoke, and why they can be a benefit to all.
Dr. Brad Reedy took your live questions. He addressed toxic families and how to (or not to) live with them, wilderness solos, and the benefits of attending an Evoke Intensive therapeutic retreat. He also discussed the impact of siblings vs parents on family systems and adoption.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses the concept of wilderness solos, the practice of Evoke students taking time away from the group and on their own during their stays. He likens the solo to Joseph Campbell's hero's journey, where the circumstances in the hero's life compel them to go deep within themselves, understand who they truly are, and experience life-changing revelations because of that reflection.
Dr. Brad Reedy took live questions about individuation vs. rebellion, what to do when a child doesn't honor your boundaries, and what families can do toward their growth and healing while their child's away at wilderness. He also discusses how to think about the concept of a higher power in recovery groups if you are not religious, and what to do when you are doing your work and growing, but difficult emotions are overwhelming you as you do that healing.
In this second part of the book review of "Contexts" by J.D. Gill, Dr. Brad Reedy dissects the destructive nature of binary thinking, the importance of safety in healthy attachments, and how rebellion happens and what it signifies.
Dr. Brad Reedy answers parents’ questions about what to do when their child, who is back from treatment, starts smoking weed again, how to handle defiance, and how to avoid seeing your child or partner in a predetermined “tube.” He also covers questions about author J.D. Gill’s new book "Contexts" and his latest book, "The Audacity to Be You."
Dr. Brad Reedy welcomes actor and director, husband, father and human, Justin Baldoni to the podcast. Justin shares about the work that went into writing his book, “Man Enough: Undefining My Masculinity.” Justin shares his perspectives on God, life, and family from the perspective of the Baha’i faith. Brad and Justin talk about the growth that can only come from failing and struggling. Justin shares his “why” about doing your own personal work. The special aspect of Justin’s words are how challenging it is to be a human and to come face to face with one’s own imperfections.
In the first of this two-part series, Dr. Brad Reedy discusses the book Contexts, newly released by his therapist and mentor Dr. J.D. Gill. The book dissects the meaning and importance of contexts—familial, societal, and behavioral, among others—when endeavoring to understand one’s Self and Others. This understanding, this “seeing” as Gill might call it, can help turn judgment into compassion, leading to a more authentic and honest way of living.
Dr. Reedy welcomes renown artist Caitlin Connolly to the podcast. Caitlin shares her perspectives on motherhood, activism, feminism, and duality. Caitlin uses her art to give a voice to themes that often lie just beneath the surface of the conscious mind. She shares insight into her accidental journey into feminism and the challenge of dialectics—holding two seemingly opposite ideas at the same time. She talks about exploring all of life, the light and the dark, and how such a pursuit adds depth and texture to our lives.
In this Q&A Dr. Brad Reedy discusses how to handle it when your child, who is back from wilderness, starts to smoke pot again. He answers other questions about how not to let the symptoms of your problems distract from the root of your problems, what one parent could do about being triggered when attending the Evoke recommended 12-Step programs, and how to “detach with love.” He also addresses what to you do when it seems like your child is not really doing the work out in the field and how to create closeness with your child without creating the pressure to be close.
Dr. Brad Reedy took your live and pre-submitted questions. He answered questions about the value of psychiatric evaluations, "rescuing" our children, what happens to a child when one household seems more "stable" than the other, and whether or not there is such thing as "healthy codependency" (there isn't), among many others.
Dr. Brad Reedy defines Attunement and Codependency and describes the differences between them. While it might feel like a fine line divides them, once you understand the effects of each on the family, that fine line widens to a large gap. Attunement is quite simply seeing and responding to the child’s needs. Codependency is projecting onto the Other your needs and meeting your needs through the Other. He also discusses the effect of healthy attachments and attunement on the family system and how the right kind of therapy can be used as a way to repair deep and historical attachment wounds, rather than “fixing” surface level manifestations of those wounds.
Dr. Brad Reedy addresses a few questions that essentially ask: What do I do when my [child, parent, significant other] is feeling [a certain emotion]? He responds: When we give people the “right” to feel their feelings it helps them—and ultimately us—process and then let go of the harder or negative feelings. Then we can all start making decisions from the right place--not from control or fear or guilt or outcomes. Our decision making is then driven by something higher. He also talks about how Evoke keeps wilderness clients warm in winter, how to manage a child in a trauma response, and and how parents can structure therapy with their child's wilderness therapist, among others.
Dr. Reedy revisits his favorite book on boundaries, “The Dance of Anger,” by Harriet Lerner. He talks about how guilt and fear must be faced for us to set boundaries and become who we are. He explains that anger is a signal that we need to take better care of ourselves. He also explains how we do everything (blame, argue, guilt others, complain, rage, debate, reason, etc.) except set a boundary to get others to change to avoid doing the harder work.
Dr. Brad Reedy took your live and pre-submitted questions. Tonight he answered questions about treatment-resistant teens, how to give yourself a time out when you're in lockdown, and what effect having high expectations on your kids actually has, among others.
Dr. Brad Reedy defines trauma responses, discusses how to recognize them (i.e., If it’s hysterical, it’s historical), and then talks about ways to begin the process of moving past these automatic reactions into more intentional behaviors and response flexibility. “As parents, it is important for us to understand our trauma responses when we are trying to be a safe person for our kids. Trauma is inescapable, healing is elective,” says Dr. Reedy.
Parents ask questions about how wilderness works for kids with ASD, whether regular at-home drug testing is a good strategy, and how much to disclose to your children about your own growth work and learning. Dr. Brad Reedy also shares important thoughts on empathy and boundaries: "Don’t let your empathy rob you of your boundaries. We parents can sometimes do that and it allows us to compromise and sacrifice things that we need for ourselves."
Dr. Brad Reedy talks about many iterations of the family system and shares thoughts on how to approach each. Key messages: “When you talk about the other parent, you are talking about part of your child.” Choose “good enough.” Give up the need to be right. Learn to separate your need from your child’s need. Focus on what you can control. Your co-parenting relationship is modeling to your kid how to manage conflict in their lives. He also addresses parental alienation.
Dr. Reedy welcomes Mackenzie Phillips to the broadcast. Mackenzie, the daughter of musical royalty, climbed aboard the acting-train when it pulled into town. She created a successful acting career and is best known for her roles on “American Graffiti,” “One Day at a Time,” and “Orange is the New Black.” And in 2008, after a public arrest at LAX, she made her way towards recovery from addiction and mental health issues. Today, Mack works with individuals and families looking to free themselves from addiction and eating disorders at “Breathe Life Healing Center” located in Laurel Canyon, California, the same canyon made famous by her parents (her father was John Phillips of the Mama’s and the Papas) and their friends during the late 1960’s. Mack opens up and speaks candidly about her history of addiction and the difficult road to recovery.
A parent wonders how to accept and contain her daughter’s “big” personality and moods when she feels so depleted and overwhelmed herself. Dr. Reedy says: The child does not need you to be perfect—they just need you to own your imperfection as yours. By demonstrating healthy self-care. By learning to apologize. And then by being ok with them being angry and disappointed when you do. Other parents ask about ODD, adoption/attachment issues, wilderness life nuts and bolts, and more.
In this webinar, Dr. Brad Reedy reviews the book “What Happened to You” by Dr. Bruce Perry & Oprah Winfrey. Dr. Reedy praised the book as being a great introduction to trauma work while also shifting the narrative away from "What is wrong with you?" toward "What happened to you?" In essence, the book suggests looking at people’s behaviors and struggles through the lens of their history and past experiences instead of looking at them as symptoms. Dr. Reedy discusses how the brain stores traumatic experiences in the subconscious and how those past events shape a person’s behaviors and reactions later in life. He then goes into depth on healing trauma and emphasizes this important message from the book, “Your connectedness to family, community, and culture is more predictive of your mental health than your history of adversity.”
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses school shootings and how to manage your own anxiety about them before trying to help your kids. He also covers how to share your experience with your kids without giving them advice. Says Dr. Reedy, “Mental health is about becoming our most authentic self. At Evoke we don’t think of it as 'being good' or getting the 'right' answer. So the idea of advice doesn’t even fit into our paradigm.” Additionally, he elaborates on how, when it comes to any kind of relationship, talking is a taking thing and listening is a giving thing.
Dr. Reedy tackles the issue of intimacy and betrayal and couples. He talks about the dynamics that contribute to betrayal in each partner and in the couple. He talks about how problems in a marriage are most often present during courtship, in the early phases of romantic love. Dr. Reedy explains that talking is a taking thing and listening is a giving thing. He also encourages couples to understand the difference between loving and needing. Lastly, he exhorts individuals to do their work, explore the landscape of their own woundedness, and own their issues, to prevent the projection of the bad parts of the Self onto the partner.
Dr. Brad Reedy takes your live and pre-submitted questions. Tonight he addresses an array of topics from how to support a child with a Borderline diagnosis to whether or not to try to prevent your child from running with the "wrong crowd" to the best way to address school shootings with your school-aged children.
Dr. Reedy welcomes inner-child coach, Tiffany McKelvy. Tiffany helps the all-grown-up-but-still-very-lost children of toxic family systems find their way home to their most embodied, authentic selves. Through connecting with and reparenting their inner child, these individuals have the opportunity to disrupt the trauma loops that keep parts of us trapped, afraid, and disconnected from the whole of our beings. By engaging in this work, Tiffany’s clients are able to pull themselves out from beneath the weight of the projections, judgments, and expectations of their childhood caregivers and redefine their relationships with pleasure, play, creativity, and identity. As Ram Dass wisely shared, “we’re all just walking each other home,” — and this particular walk is monumental and not unfamiliar for Tiffany. While she cannot finish this journey for you, she hopes that you’ll let her hold the lantern and bring light to the shadowy spaces while you go it together for a while.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses control vs influence and healthy detachment, and how when you are familiar with these concepts and trying to live them, your boundaries by definition are clearer and better. He also touches on codependency and how it shows up as us giving people what we want or need and calling it helping them. And he tackles the myths and inaccuracies in the phrase “trust the process” when it comes to therapy.
Dr. Brad Reedy welcomes Evoke Intensives therapist Alex White to the podcast. Alex is a talented clinician that brings a wealth of passion and experience as a group facilitator and experiential therapist. Alex's warmth, relatability, and professional skills allow him to foster deep connections with Evoke participants. His love for learning and genuine curiosity towards life is palpable. Combined with an extensive clinical background, Alex’s presence and authenticity naturally conveys a feeling of safety and acceptance within the therapeutic process.
Dr. Brad Reedy welcomes Evoke Wilderness therapist Anthony Salerno to the podcast. Anthony shares his journey through the ranks of wilderness therapy in becoming a primary therapist. Anthony shares his approach and how he is able to stoke his passion for creating meaningful interventions at the individual, family, and group levels. Combining this rich set of clinical interventions with stories drawn from his own life experiences allows Anthony to guide students and families through the often arduous process of change.
Tonight, in anticipation of this week’s Thanksgiving holiday Dr. Brad Reedy speaks about how gratitude cannot be forced, how problems cannot be solved at the same level of consciousness at which they were created, and how the most fundamental need is to be truly seen and heard by the ones we love.
Dr. Reedy talks about learning how to think, listen, and hear others. He also talks about how a compassionate listening can facilitate healing.
Dr. Brad Reedy speaks about in-laws: dealing with dynamics, their at times intrusive behaviors, and how to set healthy boundaries with them. Much of our success depends on our ability to ally with our spouse while at the same time holding space for ourselves. He talks us through practical aspects of boundary setting, managing our own guilt, and managing the outside resistance to our boundary-setting.
Dr. Brad Reedy addresses the question of how giving up—as in letting go of expectations and outcomes—is different than giving up on someone. He also discusses boundaries and how to forgive yourself and accept the complete version of your “horrible, rotten” self no matter how difficult things get at home.
Tonight Dr. Brad Reedy talks about school refusal. He suggests that perhaps school refusal isn’t the “problem” but instead is your child’s “solution” to a deeper issue. He offers different ideas to consider such as getting your child tested for learning differences. And he closes by discussing parents’ own evaluation of their goals concerning their children.
Dr. Brad Reedy welcomes Intensive’s and Coaching therapist Theresa Hasting to the podcast. Theresa shares her journey from parenting education, wilderness therapy, to the birth of Soul Tending Services. She talks about joining the Intensive and Coaching team and explains how she differentiates coaching from counseling and psychotherapy.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses how to cope and respond to siblings who experience trauma because of the disruption caused by an identified patient. He talks about containing reflecting back to the sibling a sense of “okay-ness.” He talks about the pitfalls of trying to force siblings into treatment or to talk about their feelings before they are ready. He also suggests the parents focus on their own regulation as a means of providing children what they need.
Dr. Reedy takes live question from the audience and talks about the right time to bring a child home after treatment. He talks at length about boundaries and working on yourself. He explains how sibling work is often a parent’s work.
Dr. Reedy talks all things enmeshment: What is it? Why does it exist? How to we repair it? How does anxiety and codependency figure into the enmeshment dynamic?
Dr. Reedy takes live question from the audience and responds to parents who have tried everything. He talks about how doing your work changes you, which may result in changing your relationships with others.
Dr. Reedy discussed ways that our children and others manipulate us. He explains what creates our vulnerability to manipulation and the work we need to do to be able to resist losing ourselves in relationship to others.
Dr. Reedy take live questions and talks about finding a therapist, and how to find a therapy program when a child is high-risk. He also talks about how to avoid putting pressure on our children when offering treatment or therapy. He explains ways to support siblings of the identified patient.
Dr. Reedy talks about how to engage resistance in others without provoking it and making it worse. He talks about how attachment theory and attachment-based therapy inform therapists and parents about how to deal with troubling symptoms or defenses in children. He explains how "honoring" the defense heals and how the goal is to "find" clients and others rather than try to "fix" them and in finding them, they fix themselves.
Dr. Reedy welcomes Sanford Shapiro back to the podcast. Sanford shares the story of parenting a stepson through mental illness, doing our own work, and how neuroscience informs parenting.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions and talks about how to find people that can support you on your journey. He explains how children need to retain their dignity and how to respect their boundaries while still holding true to yourself.
Dr. Reedy talks about when our children self-sabotage and how understanding primary and secondary gains can prevent reactive parenting.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions and talks on the issues of praise and how to make difficult parenting decisions when no option is devoid of risks.
Dr. Reedy explains how narcissism and entitlement develop in children. He explains how a parent’s unhealed and unexplored attachment issues impact children. Dr. Reedy explains how understanding the wound beneath the symptom creates compassion and a more effective response to our children. And he warns against shaming children and instead invites parenting into their own work.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions and talks about relationally based therapy vs behaviorally based therapy. He also explains how accepting yourself as imperfect and flawed is the door to freedom and the basis of the ability to love others. He explains how to separate-out and honor our feelings while maintaining boundaries with our children.
Dr. Reedy talks about how the seasons affect the clinical aspects of the program. He explains how should and shouldn't get in the way of self awareness and self esteem. He also talks about mother and father wounds and how they affect a child’s development.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions and talks about what it means to let go and how to love our children and support them on their journey.
Dr. Reedy explains the theory of wilderness therapy and how to introduce (or not) wilderness therapy to your child. He explains the pitfalls in selling it to your child and empowers parents to avoid justifying their decision to family and friends.
Dr. Reedy discusses the role of the parent in the child’s life and why a parent’s feelings weigh so heavily on the child’s psyche. He also talks about what to do when a child doesn't respect a #boundary. He talks about how grandparents can support their grandchildren buy learning and doing their own work. This is a live Q&A with family members of Evoke Therapy Programs.
Dr. Reedy discusses communication in the context of wilderness therapy. He talks about how our communication can reveal family patterns and dynamics and how we can notice our feelings but not react to them. He gives suggestions for approaching a visit to get the most out of it.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions and talks about various subjects like dealing with your child’s diagnosis, how grandparents can support the process, and understanding the interplay between the disease model of addiction and the mental health/trauma model.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions and talks about various subjects like transitioning home after treatment, how sharing our feelings with our children impacts their development, and the role of parents as teachers for their children.
Dr. Reedy explores the trauma and grief of raising a child struggling with mental health issues. He talks about how therapy and 12-Step groups can offer a place to feel and heal. He explains how attachment and attachment trauma relate to trauma and resiliency. He implores parents and other family members to do their own work so they can be present with those struggling, providing a reparative experience.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses how we heal childhood attachment patterns and wounds. He talks about validating feelings but not trying to control feelings and how some skills suggest that when we listen to others’ feelings, we can make they dissipate. He also discusses treating borderline traits and how techniques only show us how to be; they do not dictate what we do and say.
Dr. Brad Reedy discuss trauma and experiential therapies. He explains how the trauma affects the brain and how psychodrama accesses aspects of ourselves beyond words (talk therapy).
Dr. Brad Reedy takes live questions from the audience and discusses the journey of parenting and how enlightenment is a process of accepting our fallibility. He talks about how owning our issues and doing our work is the first step towards awareness and a step that few people take. He talks about how to think about questions regarding boundaries with our children.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses how to create a support network for yourself. He talks about how our outer world mirrors our inner world. Brad explains how one must learn to require others to treat them well, instead of threatening, pleading, arguing, debating, or begging to be treated well.
Dr. Brad Reedy takes live questions from the audience and discusses journey of parenting and how enlightenment is the process of accepting our fallibility.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses the Myths of Being Right, Chapter 9 of The Journey of the Heroic Parent. He talks about how the defense we set up is to protect us from being alone or abandoned. Dr. Reedy explains how being right is a counterfeit form of being who you are, being a self, being a vulnerable human being. He explains how parents can become more human and model this to their children by doing their work and discovering their authentic self.
Dr. Brad Reedy talks about what to do when communication skills don't work. He also talks about when to negotiate boundaries and when to stay firm.
Dr. Reedy talks about how when we support our children, we must avoid trying to control them even when we think our motives are pure or will prevent them from making big mistakes. He explains how children are not capable of holding their parents’ feelings without suffering some great cost, primarily the loss of the authentic self.
Dr. Reedy destroys myths surrounding guilt and shame. discuss how guilt and shame are not effective tools in parenting and moral development. He explains how we have to tolerate feelings of guilt in order to do the right thing.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from audience members and talks on themes of when to share your feelings with your child and how to be support a sibling returning home from treatment.
Dr. Reedy discuss a central theme in his book, distinguishing control from levels of structure and strictness. He talks about how controlling parenting is toxic and involves the use of emotional coercion (shame, fear, guilt, debate, lecturing). He talks about how boundaries come from a place of self-care and demonstrate healthy psychological boundaries. He explains that permissive parents tend to be controlling because they use emotions to manipulate children and to ask children to take care of parents' emotions—he explains how this dynamic leads to a lack of a sense of self in the child.
Dr. Brad Reedy takes live questions from the audience on parenting. He talks about how our wounds and the symptoms created to protect us can hurt those close to us. The tittle of this broadcast is taken from Dr. JD GIll's book. "The Letters of Juliet to the Knight in Rusty Armor."
Dr. Brad Reedy welcomes Michael Mclean and Jeff Mclean to the podcast. Michael, the father, is a renowned L.D.S. songwriter, playwright, author, and filmmaker. His son Jeff is an accomplished artist, singer, voice teacher, and actor in his own right. This podcast is as preview for a book the three are writing of navigating the landscape from a conservative, small-town, religious community to a father and son finding each other after the son comes out gay. We talk about faith, God, love, and what it means to find each other when the dominant messages in our culture drive us away from each other.
Dr. Brad Reedy takes live questions from the audience. He talks about making parenting decisions from a place of willingness and capacity rather than from a place of should or should not.
Dr. Reedy continues to review chapters from his first book, “The Journey of the Heroic Parent.” In Chapter 5, Tools for Encourage Change in Your Children, Dr. Reedy explains behavioral theory and how, for it to be most effective, it must be built on a foundation of self-awareness. He explains, “Before trying to change our child’s behavior, we would be wise to listen to what that behavior is trying to tell us.”
Dr. Brad Reedy welcomes Meredith Bluestine to the broadcast. Meredith talks about her journey dealing with a child struggling with mental health issues and how it turned her towards looking inward and doing her own work. She talks about a mother’s guilt and shame. She talks about the need to talk with other parents, devoid of judgment, to find healing. She shares a mantra from the poet Maggie Nelson, “It is idle to fault a net for having holes.” We discuss what “doing your own work is” and how it makes a difference.
Dr. Reedy welcomes Sanford Shapiro back to the podcast. Sanford talks about "twice exceptional" clients and why it matters. He talks about seeing children and how in our understanding them, we must embrace complexity and mystery. Sanford is Evoke's Learning Specialist and Executive Consultant. He is also the author of "A Light Within" and "A Light Within My Dyslexia."
Dr. Brad Reedy goes beyond the basics of communication by exploring the foundations of connection with our children. After reviewing the “I Feel Statement” and “Reflective Listening” skills, Dr. Reedy examines how these tools help us to become more aware of the internal landscapes ad the motives that are driving our behaviors.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience and explains how to help children move through difficult and painful emotions. He explains that by allowing children feel and not getting attached to them getting over their feelings or encouraging resolution, we help them to integrate and resolve difficult feelings. We "hold" them with love and patience and they are able to naturally move through feelings towards a sense of wholeness.
A Model for Understanding Your Child (Ch. 3 JHP book review) - Ep 387 by Dr. Brad Reedy
Dr. Brad Reedy takes questions from the live audience and discusses the work required to welcome a child home from treatment; how to (or not to) give advice to children; and how we teach our children to feel.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses how “enlightenment,” in part, is discovering your humanness and now you interact with your child’s issues. He reiterates the invitation in this chapter to take the heroic journey inward to discover the parts of you and your past relate to the struggles you are having today.
Dr. Brad Reedy reviews and expands upon chapter 1 of his book, The Journey of the Heroic Parent. He describes how our children, struggling with mental health issues, need us to look deeply into ourselves, our history, to discover how we are participating in the family dynamics. He explains how healthy attachment is the best predictor of our children’s mental health and how doing our work, not the quality of our childhood, is the best predictor of whether or not we are able to provide our children with a healthy, secure attachment.
Dr. Brad Reedy takes live questions from the audience. He talks about honoring other people’s defenses. And he explains how listening to our children’s feelings and detaching from an outcome is the best way to help a child move through their feelings of anger and resentment.
Dr. Brad Reedy welcomes former teen-model, entrepreneur, feminist, social media influencer, and political agitator Rosie Card to the podcast. Rosie is a powerful voice in the LDS social media world, taking on patriarchy and advocating for LGBTQ rights. She has attracted the attention of others of her faith including its leaders and government officials with her powerful and courageous voice. She shares her journey and why she thinks it’s important to hold her community accountable from within.
Dr. Brad Reedy welcomes Jacky Power to the podcast. Jacky is a therapist and poet and uses her poetry and her voice to speak about the authentic and beautiful struggle of human being. She is an addictions psychologist and offers poetry workshops for those looking to find their voice using the blank page as the “perfect therapist.”
Dr. Brad Reedy takes live questions from the audience as he discusses traps of co-parenting and developing a practice of self-compassion.
Dr. Reedy welcome psychotherapist Minaa B. She specializes in treating childhood and racial trauma, depression, anxiety, and self-care. She is the author of, "Rivers Are Coming: A Collection of Essays And Poems On Healing From Depression and Trauma." Based in New York City, Minaa is a speaker, writer and workshop facilitator who uses practices such as creative arts, literacy and storytelling to help people manage their mental health and cultivate healing.
Dr. Brad Reedy reviews the final chapter of his book, The 12 Myths in Mental Health and Keys to Enlightenment. He debunks ideas like the value of guilt and the idea that one is responsible for the happiness of others. He talks about learning to loose and remaining on speaking terms with your own mental illness.
Dr. Reedy talks about 8 practical tools that can change the way we interact and the way we see ourselves in relationship to others. He talks about how tools can help us in the short run with our boundaries and also how they can help us understand what it means to be a healthy, fallible person.
Dr. Brad Reedy welcomes Ashleigh Warner to the podcast. Ashleigh is a holistic family psychologist based in Australia and her focus is on emotional regulation and parental co-regulation. We talk with Ashleigh about tantrums, parental triggers, and how a child’s rage and tears can be a good thing.
On the heals of the recent podcast on "What to Look for In a Therapist," Dr. Reedy takes questions on choosing a therapist and other questions from live audience members. He explains the concepts in "adequate therapy."
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses what to look for in a therapist. He talks about the concept of containing and how good therapy creates competing experiences for repairing attachment wounds. He talks about how adequate therapy means being heard and seen rather than being fixed.
Dr. Brad Reedy welcomes Dufflyn Lammers, a Recovery and Addiction Coach who works with women, couples and families struggling with substance abuse disorders and sex and love addiction. She shares her story and how it led to this calling. She talks about how boundaries allow us to demonstrate compassion for others. She describes her work as giving people permission to be human.
Taking live questions from audience members, Dr. Brad Reedy talks about triangulation—how when one problem in a family is resolved, tensions start to mount in other relationships. He also talks about how boundaries and self-care are necessary so that we can provide compassionate service to others.
Dr. Reedy welcomes Dr. Julie Hanks as she talks about her work empowering women and navigating faith transitions. She talks about the need for parents to lovingly detach in order to create intimacy. Dr. hanks explains how to navigate seemingly conflicting messages between clergy, conservative culture, and mental health professionals.
Dr. Brad Reedy continues his series on his new book, The Audacity to Be You by discussing Chapter 6: Knowing Mental Health. He talks about the continuum of mental health and illness and how we are all somewhere on that continuum. He talks about being human vs. being good. He talks about diagnoses as simply patterns of behaviors we develop to cope with painful emotions and how confronting defenses is an ineffective strategy for healing.
Dr. Brad Reedy takes live questions from audience members on mental health and parenting. He explains how working with others’ defenses is like driving a car on a frozen lake—you learn how much gas and brake you can apply or how sharp a turn you can make before you lose traction. He emphasizes that in many situations and relationships you cannot win, but you can only choose how to lose (by being your authentic self).
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses Chapter 5: Marriage, Divorce and Psychosis from his new book, The Audacity to be You. He talks about unlearning much of what the dominant culture teaches about love and marriage and how each partner is responsible for their own happiness. He emphasizes the need to shift from being a good partner to being a human being.
Dr. Brad Reedy answers questions from the audience and addresses issues regarding the parallel process for parents or loved ones of those struggling with mental health and addiction issues.
Dr. Brad Reedy continues the series on his new book, The Audacity to Be You, discussing Chapter 4, “Love that makes a Difference.” He talks about tangible love vs. merely a feeling of warmth and affection. He talks about love and needing and how to recognize the difference between taking and giving. He talks about the ask in intimacy and how the talker is often asking for something and the listener is the giver.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses tips for navigating family dynamics and cultural expectations during the holidays. He invites mindfulness and self-compassion as you make decisions to spend time with family members during holiday rituals and celebrations. He makes a case for understanding how to make space for yourself while honoring your family.
Dr. Brad Reedy, Evoke’s Executive Clinical Director, takes live questions. he talks about why it is important to give the identified patient a voice for their pain and hurt. He talks about how to make think about medication vs. therapy. He talks about the goals in setting boundaries.
Dr. Brad Reedy, Evoke’s Executive Clinical Director, continues the series on his new book, The Audacity to Be You. In Chapter 3 we explore boundaries and how boundaries are a prerequisite for intimacy and connection. He debunks the myth of “loving too much” and explains how boundaries are not for changing others but for self-care.
Dr. Brad Reedy, Executive Clinical Director at Evoke Therapy Programs, gives a presentation about transference and countertransference and Evoke's approach to therapy.
Dr. Brad Reedy, Evoke’s Executive Clinical Director, takes live questions from parents on various topics including how therapy can help us find ourselves, how to know the difference between the authentic self and the false self, and how these ideas apply to work contexts and in situations where are children may need our help.
Dr. Brad Reedy, Evoke’s Executive Clinical Director, continues his series on "The Audacity to Be You: Learning to Love Your Horrible, Rotten Self." He explains how the quality of our relationships depends on the relationship we have with ourselves. He talks about be good and right vs. being a Self. And he explains how raising children to be a real Self fosters resiliency.
Dr. Brad Reedy, Evoke’s Executive Clinical Director, welcomes Emilee Krupa, LMFT-i. Emilee is an Evoke Intensives Clinical Assistant. She shares her journey of healing that led to her work with Evoke and the need for therapeutic professionals to continue on the life-long journey towards mental health and healing.
Dr. Brad Reedy, Evoke’s Executive Clinical Director, takes live questions from parents on various topics including how to best support a child who is in therapy, how to find your authentic self when you don't have the support of a spouse, and how/when to apologize to your children when you make a mistake so they feel heard and seen.
In this first installment of a series, Dr. Brad Reedy, Evoke’s Executive Clinical Director, discusses “Chapter 1: On Being Human,” from “The Audacity to Be You,” He discusses how Evoke’s therapy approach attempts to bring clients into a new level of consciousness. More than skills, tools or advice, Brad talks about how effective therapy transforms clients, providing them with lasting expertise on their own lives.
Dr. Brad Reedy, Evoke Executive Clinical Director, takes live questions on parenting a young adult and how much a parent should be involved in an adult child’s life. He talks about how parents learn to consider challenges by changing their level of awareness and consciousness. Other topics include planning for life after treatment and what it means to "let go of the outcome."
Dr. Brad Reedy, Evoke Executive Clinical Director, talks about prioritizing academics in relationship to overall mental health. He emphasizes that while academics may be an indicator that something is wrong, academic struggle is not THE problem. He talks about how children today are often maligned when compared to previous generations.
Dr. Brad Reedy welcomes Danny Conroy, the Founder of AIM House in Boulder Colorado, to the podcast. Brad and Danny talk about doing your own work as a professional. Danny also talks about the evolution of his work and learning to lean into the important work of supporting parents by their children are in therapy.
Dr. Brad Reedy, Evoke Executive Clinical Director, talks about Existential Therapies including Viktor Frankl’s Logotherapy. He talks about how clients and parents can live in “good faith” or “bad faith.” He talks about the spiritual aspects of transcending one’s facticity (the circumstance in their lives) allowing them the feeling of peace in turbulent times.
Dr. Brad Reedy, Evoke Executive Clinical Director, takes live questions from the audience on mental health, self-compassion, and how to rebuild trust with children. He also talks about co-parenting challenges.
Brad interviews Evoke Therapy Programs' therapist, Phil Bryan. Phil shares his passion for research and his long history with wilderness therapy. He talks about his experience in Outward Bound and adventure therapy and contrasts it with Evoke's model. He talks about his approach to clients and spending time in the outdoors.
Dr. Brad Reedy, Evoke Executive Clinical Director, talks about the meaning of “our work.” He distinguished between guilt and accountability and explains how parental guilt harms parents and children. He talks about how we dehumanize our children, and we do this because we have been dehumanized. He explains how to shift from guilt to love and how moral development comes from learning how to feel.
Dr. Brad Reedy, Evoke Executive Clinical Director, takes live questions from the audience on mental health, self-compassion, and the heroic nature of living authentically. He talks about the fundamental shift in our living that makes a difference for us and for those we love.
Dr. Brad Reedy, Evoke Executive Clinical Director, talks about the idea of therapy fatigue. He begins by talking about elements of effective therapy and good therapists. He explains that therapy should feel supportive, nurturing, and connecting. He explains that there is no moral imperative to participating in therapy and offers permission for those who want to opt out.
Dr. Brad Reedy, Evoke Executive Clinical Director, answers questions on various topics. How can we support a loved one while they are in treatment? What role should a parent play in siblings reconciling? How do we balance expectations when it comes to academics and therapy? How does one decide when a client is done with therapy?
A practical look at the concept of the inner-child. Dr. Brad Reedy, Evoke Executive Clinical Director, talks about the idea of the inner-child and how this concept can be practical in helping in all our current relationships.
Dr. Brad Reedy, Evoke's Executive Clinical Director, takes questions from audience members. This week's topics include the relationship between morality and guilt, gaslighting in families, and how to best support a child or family member returning from treatment.
Guest host Judith Sadora, L.M.F.T., welcomes colleagues Gabrielle Burton and Jessica Amascual to have a discussion with her about mental health and how it relates to the Black, Indigenous and People of Color (BIPOC) community. They share their stories as women of color and the importance of centering BIPOC voices and experiences as it specifically relates to trauma. These ladies will be hosting Evoke's first Embracing You Intensive for women of color.
Dr. Brad Reedy, Evoke Executive Clinical Director, takes questions from listeners. He talks about forgiving children while they are still struggling, letting go, and why Attachment Theory supports all other theories at Evoke.
Dr. Reedy welcomes Evoke's Learning Specialist and Executive Consultant and author of "A Light Within My Dyslexia," Sanford Shapiro. Sanford talks about the prevalence of anxiety and the latest information on treatment of anxiety. He also talks about the consequences of parents and staff over-accommodating children and young adults with anxiety.
Dr. Reedy welcomes Evoke Intensives' new Clinical Director, Travis Slagle. Travis talks about his journey to Evoke, what led him to become a therapist, and his passions for gardening and guitar. He shares his passion for the work and how Evoke's approach to resistance sets it apart.
Dr. Reedy talks about how understanding trust as a choice is helpful vs. thinking about it as objectively earned. He suggested parents place emphasis on earning trust from children. He warns against parents feeling rushed to trust children, but encourages them to set boundaries rather than heaping on guilt and shame.
Guest host Judith Sadora, L.M.F.T. welcomes renowned thinker Angela Tucker to the podcast. They discuss transracial adoption and centering the adoptee. They talk about how adoptees carry trauma along with any gratitude they have for their adoptive parents. Angela gives her thoughts about transracial adoption and the responsibility of white parents who adopt children of color.
Dr. Reedy takes questions from audience members. Topics discussed include attachment with neurologically atypical children, how we can set boundaries without appearing selfish, and how to cope with loss (or missing a child in treatment).
Dr. Reedy talks trauma, trauma responses, and how the brain works. He explains how we discover our historical trauma by looking at our fight/flight responses and tracing them back. Flexible responses are contrasted with trauma-based, rigid, knee-jerk, reactive responses.
Dr. Reedy talks about healthy detachment, boundaries, and letting-go of outcomes. He points out that healthy detachment is synonymous with healthy attachment and that to move away from codependency, we must be willing to do battle with our guilt.
Dr. Reedy talks about preparing for your children coming home after treatment. He explains the principles of a good behavioral contract; he also talks about the value and the pitfalls of contracts.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions on objectifying your children, what to focus on when your child gets home, and how to intervene when siblings are estranged.
Dr. Reedy welcomes Sanford Shapiro in the first of a series of episodes talking about parental anxiety. Sanford talks about fixing children versus treatment. He talks about how wisdom from working with learning disabilities can be applied to the general population.
Dr. Reedy talks about awareness and accountability and how we focus on one or the other for parents and children. He talks about the place that children occupy in a parent’s mind vs. the weight of the parent in the child’s mind and psyche. He talks about the qualities of a good apology and the gift of an amends or an accountability letter. He talks about paradigms of power in families and how parents who are hesitant to write an accountability letter to their children are held hostage by family systems that emphasized right and wrong over the development of the self.
Dr. Reedy talks about coming out as and LGBTQ+ person. He talks about the impact of how family members, parents in particular, respond and the impact that has on the young person. He talks about the approach from a therapeutic lens in contrast to other paradigms such as religious or cultural.
Dr. Reedy defines narcissist wounding as the wound of not being seen. While narcissism is used casually and often as an insult, it comes from deep childhood wounding and attachment fractures. He debunks myths that suggest that narcissism comes from overindulging children or permissive parenting. Dr. Reedy explains that we all have some wounding and all have some attributes of narcissism.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions on trust children, coming home after wilderness, and parenting control. He talks about suicide and learning to listen to children as if they are telling you about their dreams.
Dr. Reedy discusses the common ways people exhibit borderline patterns of thinking and functioning. Ge talks about the divisiveness and trauma present in our culture and how borderline thinking, all or nothing/black and white thinking is a sign of trauma. He talks about how we make the badness external to make ourselves feel comfortable instead of focusing on and owning our own issues.
Dr. Reedy welcomes Dr. Harriet Lerner to the podcast. In this interview, they talk about the history and culture of mother-blaming, developing self-compassion, and how an authentic apology leads to healing for both parties. Dr. Lerner uses her personal story and her unique voice to talk about how she got into therapy and writing. Brad asks Harriet about how triggers don't equate to blame and Harriet talks about how to "not take yourself too seriously."
Dr. Reedy share research on child development and parenting and how talking about race with our children makes a difference. He suggests that we not wait to talk about race with our children and that the uncomfortable discussion is important to have. He suggests that we learn to listen to others (and our children) so that they don't think that violence is the only way they will be heard.
This broadcast was inspired by recent events. Largely based on J.D.Gill's book, Seeing in Intimacy and Psychotherapy, Dr. Reedy talks about how to see past behaviors, symptoms, and rebellion to the wound that lies beneath. He talks about how "othering" people is a way to deal with pain and anxiety. He talks about how a transformation of Self creates an ability to hear and truly see others and how psychotherapy can facilitate this change.
Dr. Reedy welcomes Judith Sadora, primary therapist at Evoke Therapy Programs. Judith talks about transracial adoption and attachment. She talks about Narcissism, holding space for others, and the need to do our own work.
Dr. Reedy talks about how attachment theory informs therapy at Evoke Therapy Programs. He talks about how attachment wounds and fractures can be repaired by a therapist creating competing experiences for the client. the client must re-experience themselves in the context of a capable, empathic other in order to heal.
Jamie Goodman, of Pilcrow Advisors, joins Dr. Brad Reedy to discuss Parental Guilt. They discuss how guilt is not a valid measure of right and wrong and how we pass on to our children a susceptibility to peer pressure when we model guilt or use it to change behavior in our children.
From his recent book, The Audacity to Be You: Learning to Love Your Horrible, Rotten Self, Dr. Reedy talks about 12 myths of being human and being a parent, including the myth the guilt is related to morality. He also talks about the keys to enlightenment, including "learning to lose" and "knowing your mental illness."
Dr. Reedy takes questions from viewers. He talks about criteria for coming home. He discusses the sensibility shift parents make as they get into recovery from codependency.
This podcast features Dr. Brad Reedy. Two guests, Emma Reedy and Beth Miller, interview Dr. Reedy, asking personal questions and questions about his evolution as a therapist.
Dr. Reedy welcomes Sam Kelly, art therapist, author, and parent educator. Sam talks about her approach with younger children and how holding space for their feelings is the key to nurturing connection and developing their sense of self. She talks about her book, Young and Divorced. She also shares how her work relates to her family of origin and how it is ideal that parents can listen children's anger and hurt, especially when it is directed at the parent.
Dr. Reedy talks about the notion of being a good parent. The shift is from being right and good to being a Self. He suggests that the task of parenting is to raise a healthy Self and that this requires rare capacity.
Dr. Reedy takes questions from parents and talks about how family members can best support their loved one in treatment.
Dr. Reedy talks about dealing with stress, anxiety and fear during the pandemic. He talks about how we need to find someone who can sit with us in our pain and grief so we can learn to move through our feelings. Dr. Reedy shares several quotes and ideas from Dr. Harriet Lerners book, The Dance of Fear.
Dr. Reedy talks about the attributes of an adequate therapist. He shares the secret to knowing that you have an adequate therapist is that when you share being upset with them, they apologize rather than making it about you. He also talks about the parallels between an adequate therapist and an adequate parent.
Dr. Reedy welcomes Author and Parent Coach Krissy Pozatek. Krissy talks about her roots in wilderness therapy and how it informs her parent coaching. She talks about allowing children to feel and empowering parents. She shares the core principles of her work and talks about her new online Parallel Process Intensive program.
Dr. Reedy welcomes Evoke's Executive Director and Partner Rick Heizer to talk about Evoke Therapy Programs' response and policies related to COVID 19. They address both health-safety policies and questions related to the clinical work at Evoke during the pandemic.
Dr. Reedy welcomes author, professor, and his personal therapist, Dr. J.D. Gill. Dr. Gill talks about how to find and recognize a good therapist. She talks about how we create healthy attachment. She also takes questions from attendees on to cope with the unique challenges during the COVID-19 Pandemic. She talks about how we cope with the increase in fear that many are experiencing.
This episode begins with a meditation by one of Evoke's Field Guides, Dakota Huffman. Dr. Reedy talks about our collective grief and how we cope with the existential anxiety and grief many are feeling. He reads comments and statements of hope shared by attendees and talks about how we find comfort in our connections.
Dr. Reedy invites a guest lead a meditation to begin. He talks about mindfulness and gratitude in the face of our anxiety, pain, and grief. He talks about non-judgment and how it affects us. He talks about what to look for in a therapist and a key to knowing whether you have an adequate therapist.
Dr. Reedy hosts an open discussion during the COVID 19 pandemic. Participants offer support, insight and love to each other. Dr. Reedy leads a meditation and offers so insight into coping with the anxiety that many are feeling.
Dr. Reedy talks about how to listen and help children feel safe during precarious times. He offers some dos and don't to make sure parental anxiety is not leaking onto our children. The talks about how in times like these, what we were doing for self care before may not be enough. We may have to do things differently and find new resources and practices to maintain our serenity.
Dr. Reedy hosts a broadcast during the coronavirus pandemic. He talks about the spiritual challenges of this time of social distancing, He offers some practical suggestions for coping. He announces that Evoke will hold live broadcasts for the public all week to help people through this difficult time.
Dr. Reedy talks about the work we do at Evoke Therapy Programs intensives. He talks about how understanding and exploring pour past can lead us to greater insight about the dilemmas we face today. He talks about inner-child work and how that can help us remember what it was like as a child which leads use to understanding our children better.
Dr. Reedy discusses Carl Jung's idea of the shadow. He talks about how incorporating the split-off parts of ourselves creates balance, integration, healing, and harmony with others. He talks about the power that comes into our lives as we come to know ourselves and how that helps us to understand our loved ones who may be struggling. He talked about how we find the shadow by looking to our dreams, art, humor, and our intense reactions to others.
Brad interviews Jenna Pacelli, therapist at Evoke Entrada. Jenna talks about her approach to treating trauma using Somatic Experiencing. She talks about what led her to wilderness therapy. She articulates the intersect of mindfulness and neuroscience and how she incorporates Eastern and Western perspectives into her work.
Dr. Brad Reedy talks about his new book, "The Audacity to Be You," what it means to be a Self and love an Other. He talks about learning to love yourself and how therapy can help.
Dr. Reedy takes questions from family, and friends of Evoke. He talks about how to be support your loved one while they are at Evoke. He talks about power-struggle and the nature of Intensive Workshops. He talks about how to sit with our more vulnerable and insecure parts of ourselves.
Dr. Reedy give a fave review to Harriet Lerner's Dance of Connection. He summarizes many key points and tools and touts the book as a wonderful invitation to be your "highest self" and be kind to yourself along the way. He talks about how connection starts with Self work and boundaries.
Dr. Reedy interviews Chelsie Newkirk, Primary Therapist at Evoke Entrada. Chelsie talks about what brought her to wilderness therapy and how the wilderness calms the nervous system and assists her in her work with clients. She talks about brain-spotting and the somatic work she does with clients.
Dr. Reedy welcomes Birgit Show, Primary Therapist at Evoke Cascades. Birgit talks about her upbringing in Germany and her journey to find wilderness therapy and Evoke. She talks about her approach to therapy and the influences that impact her work with her clients.
Dr. Reedy talks about 13 things not to say to your children and the psychology behind the ideas, including things like "I would do anything for you" and "You're too sensitive."
Dr. Reedy welcomes Lauren Roberts, Assistant Clinical Director and Primary Therapist at Evoke Cascades. Lauren talks her approach to therapy and supervision. She talks about being a mother and the lessons that has taught her about working with families. She talks about her passions and some of her most memorable moments and lessons in wilderness therapy.
Dr. Reedy talks about random topics and takes live questions on mental health related issues in parenting. He talks about the effects of leaning into resistance instead of trying to control others. He shares a case study. The talks about the difference between identifying ways we impact our children and the guilt and blame that is so prevalent.
Dr. Reedy talks about the new book "Breaking Up With Sugar." He talks about how Molly Carmel uses her own story to break down the stigma and shame associated with disordered eating. He talks about how Carmel draws clear parallels between sugar addiction and other addictions, including the addictive thinking present in both. The author explains how this is not a diet book and how our relationship with sugar and food deserves our attention. The book offers insight, hope, and practical tools to those who may have struggled weight and eating issues for many years.
Dr. Brad Reedy talks with Lindsey Bosse, Field Director at Evoke Cascades. Lindsey shares her unique perspective from her various positions at Evoke. She talks about staff training and the monumental contribution field staff contribute to the clients' progress. She talks about her interest in how nutrition impacts mental health and her passions outside of work.
Dr. Reedy welcomes Ken Gilbert, primary therapist at Evoke Cascades. Ken talks about his journey from Evoke client, to Evoke therapist and everything in between. He shares his story of addiction and Brad and Ken talk about Ken's first session in the program as a client. Ken talks addiction, recovery, and surfing in the Deschutes river.
Dr. Reedy welcomes Molly Carmel, author of "Breaking Up with Sugar" and founder of The Beacon Programs in New York City. Molly talks about her new book and the journey to telling her story with raw honesty and courage. She talks about her decision to share her bypass surgery in a field where that is frowned upon. Molly talks about how sugar can hijack your thinking and the parallels between addiction to alcohol and drugs and the addiction to sugar. She talks about following the "middle way" and finding a way out of addictive thinking. She asks listeners to explore their relationship with food and sugar, in an effort to break free and find hope and empowerment. She talks about the toxic cycle of dieting and how to get out of self-defeating patterns.
Continuing our series with our therapists, Brad interviews Evoke at Entrada Assistant Clinical Director, Tina Grater. Tina talks about bringing heart to her work. She talks about "seeing" her clients reveal themselves and what it means to honor their defenses. She talks about motherhood and her connection to nature.
Dr. Reedy talks attachment and seeing your child. He talks about the barriers to seeing and hearing your child. And he talks about how the development of the parents' sense of Self is the key to the ability to provide the child with what they need.
In this interview with Dr. Matt Hoag, learn how he uses wilderness and the community in his work with young people and their families. Matt Hoag is a pioneer in the field of wilderness therapy and the foremost authority on research within wilderness therapy. Listen to him talk about his early days and the evolution of the field.
Dr. Reedy talks about the challenges, pitfalls, and hope in co-parenting. He also talks about parental alienation and the do's and don'ts when dealing with and grieving the effects of parental alienation.
Dr. Reedy begins by discussing topics from Evoke's recent clinical training meeting. He talks about what it means to show up differently in the world and with those we love. He talks about how we decide whether to set boundaries or to compromise. He discusses the reason for "wilderness" in wilderness therapy.
Brand Bonsall, primary therapist at Evoke Therapy Programs, talks about what led him to wilderness therapy and his approach to working with clients and families.
Dr. Reedy talks about the work that parents do with a home therapist while their child is away in therapy and how that impacts their children. He talks about the need for self-care and support so children don't feel the pressure to take care of the parent at the sacrifice of their authentic self.
Dr. Reedy talks about how parents might unconsciously ask children to take care of them emotionally. He talks about the appropriate use of "I feel statements." He talks about how to listen to and honer the symptoms of our children, even the siblings of Evoke participants.
With the new year upon us, Dr. Brad Reedy talks about therapy goals for children parents. He talks about the importance of remaining differentiated from those we love. He also discusses the format as well as the pros and cons of behavioral contracts.
Evoke therapist Judith Sadora talks about her background and her passion for family therapy. She talks about how she uses attachment to understand her clients. She also talks about issues surrounding therapy and people of color.
Dr. Reedy talks about self-harm and how responding to it with curiosity instead of fear helps individuals to recover. He explains that we can respond to mental illness symptoms in ways the increase our understanding and compassion. He talks about how self-harm (and suicidality)are attempts to escape pain and symptoms of self-hate. He explains how self-harm can become an addiction
Dr. Reedy talks about the difference between loving and needing, giving and taking. He talks about how vulnerability is only one side of the equation in intimacy. He explains the greatest gift parents can give to their children is greater self-awareness and greater self-development and how these will lead to parents being able to "carry around" their inadequacies so their children won't.
Dr. Reedy talks about how parents can be dismissive of their children's feelings, especially when feelings and directed at the parent. He describes the narcissistic wound that we all suffer from, to one extent or another. He explains how embracing our unacceptable parts lead to spiritual freedom.
This podcast is features guest host Joe Feldman as he shares tips and suggestions for pursuing insurance reimbursement from insurance companies for wilderness therapy.
Cascades' Therapist, Judith Sadora, takes us through the understanding of attachment and how it relates to racial identity development and secure relationships. Judith uses examples pulled from her experience working with transracially adopted families and interracial families.
Brad talks about factors that can lead to emotional dysregulation: exceptions, alcohol use, critical family members, and poor self-care. He describes emotional dysregulation and associated mental health issues. He encourages listeners to be kind to themselves and allow for all feelings rather than trying to force feelings we are told we "should" have.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions about length of stay in treatment, how to help siblings, and what makes Evoke Therapy Programs unique.
Dr. Brad Reedy welcomes Sanford Shapiro to the Evoke Therapy podcast. Sanford is our new Learning Specialist & Executive Consultant at Evoke Therapy Programs. He brings a wealth of experience from the cognitive sciences to help Evoke support clients with learning differences. Sanford talks about educational trauma and how universal design can help to cast a wider net to help more clients.
Dr. Reedy talks about how expectations and parental anxiety regarding perceived success impacts our children. He also talks about how parental trauma can affect the way we parent our children.
Dr. Talks explains ADHD, executive functioning, and the effects of academic and educational trauma. he talks about testing and the need for accommodations.
Dr. Brad Reedy talks about the idea of the "inner-child" and how that relates to parenting your own children. He encourages parents to explore their histories through the inner-child concept as a way to increase bandwidth in dealing with a child struggling with mental health and addiction issues.
Dr. Reedy talks about the stages and phases of growth that Evoke participants go through. He talks about how metaphor and stories bypass resistance. He talks about the risks of reducing children, or others, to their behaviors and suggests that we listen to what behaviors are trying to tell us before we try to change them.
A review of Brainspotting from David Grand's book, Brainspotting: The Revolutionary New Therapy for Rapid and Effective Change. Dr. Reedy talks about Dr. Grand's evolution from EMDR to developing an accessible and efficient model for treating trauma.
Dr. Reedy talks about boundaries, shame, going home after wilderness therapy, and other topics as parents, extended family, and friends of Evoke participants ask live questions.
Dr. Reedy explains intensive programming at Evoke Therapy Programs. He talks about psychodrama and how these experiences are for the novice or the experienced therapy goer. He suggest that there is no better thing you can do to support a loved one struggling with mental health or addiction issues, than to attend your own intensive.
Dr. Reedy talks about Autism Spectrum Disorder and how wilderness therapy works with individuals with ASD. He offers practical take-home ideas for parents and emphasizes the need for continued support. He suggests that we shift to see things through their eyes.
Dr. Reedy talks about the need for children to explore their anger and grievances towards their parents and the benefits when parents are able to hear them. He debunks the myth that giving your child a stage to complain about how you hurt them doesn't mean you can't hold them accountable--it doesn't cause them to be a victim. Listening allows them to move through their feelings.
Dr, Reedy talks about codependency and attachment. He talks about what it means to be human and contrasts it with being raised to be good or right. He talks about what to look for in an adequate therapist.
Dr. Brad Reedy talks about outcomes. He explains quantitative vs qualitative outcomes and their advantages and disadvantages. He shares some of the outcomes at Evoke, compared to other programs and approaches. He also talks about what it means to let go of outcomes and how this practice, ironically, leads to better outcomes!
Dr. Reedy talks about the nature of accountability and what we can do to encourage accountability in others, including our children. He also talks about modeling accountability and how guilt and shame are barriers to accountability and prevent awareness. He talks about our right to feel hurt and take our time to trust again.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses the impact of our family of origin (the family we grew up in) on our current day challenges and difficulties. He also talks about how the pathway out of our children’s struggles runs through looking at the ways we, as parents, hurt them and came up short. He talks about “emotional proximity” and how this is passed on in families. He talks about the need to balance our ability to hold our children psychologically (containing) and having a secure self with clear boundaries.
This book is a must read. Dr. Reedy reviews what he calls "the most important book on the subject of child development and parenting." He talks about the dynamic where a child is able to perceive what a parent needs and then gives it to the parent at the cost of the real self. He explains how many of our challenges are related to our childhood wounds and how it is only by discovering those early wounds that we are able to move past many of the pitfalls in our lives today.
Dr. Reedy talks about codependency and healthy detachment. He offers a definition of healthy detachment and describes the art of boundaries. He suggest healthy detachment is synonymous with healthy connection, attachment, and intimacy.
Evoke Therapy therapist, Judith Sadora, introduces the concepts of social graces and how it incorporates racial and cultural Identity in working with adolescents of color. She discusses the importance of normalizing and creating space to talk about concepts related to racial and cultural identity. This podcast also discusses a few strategies that adopted parents can incorporate when discussing race with their adopted children from different racial and cultural backgrounds.
Dr. Reedy talks about facing our fears & insecurities and how doing so reduces the power they have over our life. He talks about how doing so helps our children, our spouses, and our friends to feel safer. He talks about how sometimes we have to do things while we are still afraid and how therapy can help with that.
Brad talks about how decisions for length of stay are made and the kinds of things to consider. He challenges parents to avoid the mistake of thinking that treatment is a fix, but rather to approach it like it is the start of a life-long process. He talks about why so many clients go on to some residential programming after Evoke.
This broadcast is for parents new to the experience of wilderness therapy or residential treatment. Dr. Reedy discusses the benefits of experiential therapy. He talks about the adjustments families and siblings go through and where to look for support. He also discusses the benefits and ideas behind parental work in the therapeutic process.
Dr. Reedy talks about vulnerability, shame, and how we can focus on what is beneath the symptom to facilitate healing. He talks about how it can be difficult for all of us to lean into our work because we grew up in a culture of right & wrong, good & bad, blame, shame, and guilt.
Dr. Reedy discusses the stages of change for children and parents as they move through the therapy process at Evoke. He talks about regression, relapse, and how to let go of outcomes when it comes to your children's thoughts and feelings,
Dr. Brad Reedy, Clinical Director and Co-Founder of Evoke Therapy Programs, explains Evoke's wilderness therapy for those who have a family member or friend at Evoke. He talks about how you can support your loved ones as they navigate the difficult path toward healing from mental health and addiction issues.
Dr. Brad Reedy talks about how communication skills can be used to gain clarity and transform a relationship from enmeshment and reactivity to clarity and connection. He talks about the fundamental tools of communication and listening and the ideas that they rest on.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses "The Four Agreements," by Don Miguel Ruiz. He highlights how closely this book aligns with what we know about child development, attachment, and parenting. He talks about guilt and shame. He talks about learning to un-learn many of the things our parents taught us and their parents taught them. Brad recommends this book to parents and children alike as a spiritual guide to our psychological development.
Dr. Reedy talks about how fathers play an important role in the lives of their sons. He talks about being a mentor and learning to listen as keys to raising resilient and resourceful sons.
Dr. Reedy takes questions from siblings, family, and friends of Evoke Therapy Programs participants. He talks about how to support a loved one in treatment. He talks about honoring siblings struggle to reconnect to their sibling in treatment.
Dr. Brad Reedy talks about how we communicate with our children reveals qualities of our relationship with them. He provides guidance for writing letters to your child and connecting those to the underlying ideas of intimacy, connection, and differentiation.
Dr. Brad Reedy, Clinical Director of Evoke Therapy Programs, discusses the concept of our inner-child: the lost parts of ourselves, the authentic or real self. He talks about how it is lost through messages of shame and how to regain and integrate those parts of ourselves. Brad talks about doing you own work and shares some stories about his own inner-child work.
Dr. Reedy discusses self-care and creating a life where people respect and honor you and your boundaries.
Dr. Reedy talks about how being right is the opposite of being a Self. He talks about how children and parents can get stuck in the battle over who is right and who is wrong. He talks about how trying to be good and right is the enemy of personal growth.
Dr. Brad Reedy talks about entitlement in children and offers a unique perspective. He explains how terms like "spoiled," "selfish," and even "entitled" are used by adults to shame children so that the adult doesn't have to own and deal with boundary setting. He explains barriers to setting boundaries and encourages parents to do their own work to improve in this area. He also talks about how parents are shamed through labels like "helicopter-parent," "enmeshed," or even "codependent."
Dr. Reedy discusses the dynamics of trust and forgiveness as it relates to parenting a struggling child. He talks about how trust is something we own and decide to give away on our own time schedule. He talks about how healing and forgiving are at the discretion of the hurt part, not the one doing the hurting. He empowers parents to own their feelings a not be responsible for how others interpret them.
Dr. Reedy talks to parents about various types of resistance in therapy and how best to engage their children without making it worse.
Dr. Reedy talks about the 8 Tools he has seen made the biggest impact on the children and families he has worked with for the last 23 years: I statements, listening, clarifying intent, avoiding imperatives and polarizing language, developing a practice of compassion, and taking time-outs. He shares stories and examples of each of the tools as well as how they help foster differentiation in relationships.
Dr. Reedy discusses the shift from the identified patient model to treating the family system. He talks about seeing beneath the symptoms to the underlying wound that is being expressed. He also invites parents of struggling children to model vulnerability and openness in the therapeutic process.
Dr. Reedy answers questions from siblings, friends, and extended family members of Evoke participants about wilderness therapy, siblings, and mental health. Some of the topics included here are how to support a loved-one while in treatment, how to deal with a sibling at home resistant to family therapy, and how to deal with guilt for sending a child to treatment.
Dr. Reedy discusses the hot new book "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck by Mark Monson. He talks about how the book offers an accessible entry to some Buddhist concepts like radical acceptances, the inevitability of suffering, detachment, and the beginners mind. He also talks about some of the book's limitations and short comings, specifically the lack of insight on how to effectively deal with resistance.
Dr. Reedy talks about the challenges that occur when co-parents don't support each other. He discusses strategies and tools for creating cohesion. At the center of the idea is that if one becomes focused on the other parent, it can increase division and polarizations.
Dr. Reedy talks about who can benefit from attending 12-Step support groups. The benefits of attending, sharing, working the steps and having a sponsor are reviewed. Dr. Reedy suggests that the 12-Steps could benefit everyone regardless of their specific circumstances.
Dr. Reedy explains that when the identified patient is removed from the family in treatment the parents often redirect the energy towards the marital relationships. He explores qualities of a healthy marriage beginning with the development of healthy self development in each of the partners. He debunks some common ideas in our culture surrounding love and marriage.
Dr. Reedy talks about risk taking behavior, the adolescent brain, and how development informs us about our children’s risky behavior. He uses it to explain addiction and other seemingly irrational choices.
Dr. Reedy talks about dynamics underlying family conflict. He warns that conflict is not simply a measure of a child's struggle and that it may signal a need for a parental shift. He discusses concepts and tools that help in navigating conflict.
Dr. Reedy discusses the role that insight and experience play in the development of a healthy self in the therapeutic process.
Dr. Reedy reviews Refuge Recovery by Noah Levine. He praises it as a simple and straightforward approach appealing to those who may want a non-theistic approach to recovery. He also talks about how it doesn't tend to provoke defensiveness as some other models, due to it's avoidance of dogmatic principles. He talks about it as both an alternative and a compliment to other approaches to treating addiction. He discusses mindfulness and other Buddhist inspired elements of the approach.
Dr. Reedy discusses adolescent and young adult developmental tasks and the implications for parents helping children negotiate these stages.
Dr. Reedy talks about Delay of Gratification and Low Frustration Tolerance and the developmental science behind it. He talks about how these traits related to other issues. He teaches parents how to support healthy development in these areas. He explains that Wilderness Therapy, specifically nomadic primitive living wilderness therapy, is an effective way at fostering growth in these areas.
Dr. Reedy discusses the work of John Gottman, Ph.d. and his concept of emotional coaching (in contrast to dismissive, dissaproving, or laissez-faire parenting). Gottman explains how learning to hear and validate children leads to resiliency and the reduction of mental health issues. Parents who focus on behaviors rather than emotions, tend to overvalue cooperation. Parents who see a child's "negative" emotions as an opportunity for intimacy are better suited to provide healthy guidance. He explains how this is all built upon the foundation of a parent's self-awareness.
Dr. Reedy discusses the vulnerabilities and underlying issues that may lead to electronic addictions. He discuses and compares substance abuse disorders with process addiction. He talks about parenting a child struggling with self-sabatoging and self-medicating behaviors.
Dr. Reedy discusses some of the concepts underlying wilderness therapy and how those dynamics are intensified in the winter and during the holiday season. He talks about how we support and celebrate holidays and how wilderness in the winter creates mindfulness and a greater appreciation for family.
Dr. Reedy talks about important aspects of parent-child dynamic that help to improve boundaries, self-efficacy, and resiliency. Parental self-care and appropriate praise are also discussed.
Dr. Reedy discusses the need for listening before talking or teaching. He describes how the brain's higher level functioning, when feeling threatened or stressed, is hijacked and the individual is unable to take-in information or reason. He talks about the need for parents and others to listen to children to quiet the flight or fight responses, before launching into lectures or lessons, so that those lessons may sink-in.
Dr. Reedy takes questions from family and friends of Evoke Therapy Program clients: How can you support someone who is in treatment? What does a typical day in wilderness therapy look like? What happens after wilderness therapy? What if a sibling doesn't want to talk or write letters to our child while they are in treatment?
Dr. Reedy discusses the difference between being real and being right. He discusses how our contexts impact us. He discusses how therapy can help us to repair our wounds and how the authentic self is fostered through connection.
Dr. Reedy discusses finding yourself in parenting. He explains how selfless parenting is a trap and how the first ingredient in a healthy parent is a healthy sense of self. He talks about how to combine the idea of supporting your child while taking care of yourself directly rather than indirectly.
Dr. Reedy reviews The Dance of Anger and what it can teach us about boundaries. He talks about how boundaries are hard work and how we use threats, nagging, lecturing, and all other sorts of behaviors in parenting instead of setting boundaries. He also talks about how setting healthy boundaries is akin to developing and modeling a healthy sense of self and helps to foster that development in our children.
Dr. Reedy discusses how strictness and control are not the same thing. He discusses emotional coercion and how it is harmful in parenting. He talks about how most permissive parents use emotional coercion in lieu of boundaries.
Dr. Reedy is a guest with Derek Siddoway on Summit County Health Department's podcast in preparation for his talk on Raising Resilient Children, Monday September 17, 2018, from 6-8 p.m. at the Blair Education Center in Park City, Utah. Go to https://summitcountyhealth.org to learn more or to subscribe to their podcast.
Dr. Brad Reedy talks about the intersect between parental guilt and accountability. He describes how guilt can rob us of our ability to hold boundaries and practice self-care. He makes a case for the value of parents doing their own work without the negative effects of blame. He describes the "idiot" parent intervention.
Dr. Reedy takes questions from family and friends about how to support your family member at Evoke Therapy Programs. He addresses relapse and how a parent can be confident a child is telling the truth while in treatment. He also talks about what makes wilderness therapy differ from other forms of therapy.
Dr. Reedy talks about why attachment is so important and what a healthy attachment does for a child's brain and development. He also talks, practically, about what healthy attachment looks like and what gets in the way of creating it.
Dr. Reedy discusses the letter writing process at Evoke and what we can learn about communication and relationships. He discusses how we, as parents, ask children to remove their defenses when it is often we that contributed to the need for the defense in the first place.
Dr. Reedy interviews Joye and Morgan, a mother and daughter who went through Evoke's Wilderness Therapy Program. Joye and Morgan share their journey of hope and healing in the hopes that others won't feel so alone.
Dr. Reedy discusses what it means to "let go of outcomes" and how this practice can lead to exactly what we want. He talks about what gets in the way of letting go, including pain, hurt, fear, and our instinct to control. This discussion and Q&A portion of the podcast focuses, in part, on co-dependency and how to heal from it.
Dr. Reedy talks about coming out for LGBTQ+ children. He talks about it from the perspective of the child (using thoughts from Ash Beckhams TED Talk) and how best to receive and celebrate your child. He offers do's and don'ts for parents whose children come out.
Dr. Reedy discusses the value in our lives of living in different contexts. A difference context allows you to see your own context and provides perspective for understanding the implicit, unwritten, and unspoken messages of your family of origin and your day to day life. A safe therapeutic context can help repair shame and the feeling that you are not okay. A safe context is the starting place for healing and addressing symptoms that started as coping mechanisms.
Dr. Reedy talks with families from Evoke Therapy Programs about aftercare and how to support Evoke clients.
Dr. Reedy discusses regression and what to expect during transitions. He talks about how parents can focus on their own relapse and avoid addictive thinking. He explores various ways parents can utilize resources to prepare for the inevitable struggles that occur during and after transitions.
Dr. Reedy reviews Evoke Therapy Programs' communication model, including the I-feel statement and reflective listening. He also delves into the principles the underly communication theory and how people often express feelings to try to change behaviors in others. He explains that the reason we share may be more important than why we share our feelings.
Dr. Brad Reedy talks about how simple cause and effect thinking in parenting relates to objectification and shame in children. He explains how differentiation and the development of a self in a parent is the foundation for healthy attachment.
Dr. Reedy welcomes new families to Evoke Therapy Programs wilderness therapy experience and explains the theory behind wilderness therapy. He talks about the goals and objectives of wilderness therapy and how experiential therapy bypasses resistance and creates change.
Dr. Reedy discusses practicing self-care and setting boundaries with unsupportive friends and family. He talks about empowering parents to assert their needs in relationships with children and others. He explains how creating a supportive network begins with courageous and bold steps towards developing an authentic self.
Dr. Reedy discusses mindfulness practices used in Evoke's wilderness therapy. He talks about how we could broaden our idea of mindfulness beyond breathing, silent, meditation. He talks about the relationship between mindfulness and healthy attachment. He briefly comments on nutrition in the wilderness.
Dr. Reedy addresses siblings questions about Evoke Therapy Programs and how to respond to a sibling at home who doesn't want to talk about their brother or sister. He also talks about how siblings and family can support their loved one in treatment by learning about the ideas and concepts taught at Evoke. He also explains why there is less communication in the early phases of treatment with family members at home.
Dr. Reedy explores the work of William Glasser--specifically Choice Theory and Reality Therapy. He talks about the drives beneath children's mental health and addiction issues and how understanding these may create greater compassion and understanding.
Dr. Reedy explores the concepts of grit, resilience, and growth mindset. With these ideas as a foundation, he explains how the nomadic model of wilderness therapy produces the most effective outcomes. He shares Evoke's outcomes compared to the other wilderness therapy outcomes.
Dr. Reedy explains the value of a mindfulness practice. Several readings from Melody Beattie's daily reader, "The Language of Letting Go" are offered and discussed. Topics discussed include letting go, self-care, pain, letting things happen, freedom, and honoring your roots.
Dr. Reedy provides an overview of Joseph Campbell's concept of "The Hero's Journey" and he explains how each of us can use it to navigate life's challenges. Parents with struggling children are called to embark on a heroic journey and overcome fears to find "the life that is waiting for them."
Dr. Reedy discusses the do's and don'ts of behavioral reinforcement with children. He discusses the difference between control and strictness and how children can flourish with varying levels of structure, but suffer when there is emotional coercion and shame. He also talks about how, developmentally, children learn from the outside-in and parents tempted to lecture or debate are avoiding the difficult work of boundaries.
Dr. Reedy reviews the book by Krissy Pozatek, Brave Parenting: A Buddhist Inspired Guide to Raising Resilient Children. He discusses the value of listening and being present with your child's feelings and how children develop resiliency through dealing with challenges.
Dr. Reedy explains the value of immersion into the culture of wilderness therapy and how the use of metaphor, ritual, and distance help to create a powerful, experiential intervention. He shares some of the jargon from wilderness therapy and how this creates a sense of belonging for participants.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses the effects of adoption on attachment. He summarizes the book by Sherrie Eldridge, "Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew." Parents with and without adopted children learn about how the quality of attachment affects resilience. Parents are shown how to support children in grieving.
Dr. Reedy talks about how to avoid to power struggles with your children. He explains how to "lose" and avoid the trap of trying to be "good" or "right".
Dr. Reedy discusses how boundaries and synonymous with self-care, how the principle role of boundaries is not to teach others a lesson, and how parents need to give up "being right"--and learn how to lose.
Dr. Reedy talks about the how pain and wounded-ness lie beneath our symptoms and diagnoses. He talks about how to see the pain beneath the symptom and how this frame offers healing. He also talks about how therapy changes the base and leads to transformation. Lastly, he calls on parents to do their own work, heal their own trauma, and how their primary goal is to support the development of a child's sense of self.
In this open forum for family and friends, Dr. Reedy talks about shame and the effects on our children. He talks about the recent suicide of a teen in Newport Beach and the notes he left that give us a clue as to the effects in our culture with it's emphasis on performance and compliance. Dr. Reedy also talks to siblings left behind, when a child is placed at Evoke, and how best to support them.
Dr. Reedy reviews and teaches from the book, "The Price of Privilege" by Madeline Levine. Dr. Levine invites parents to make a shift from emphasizing performance to supporting the development of the "self" in children. The culture of affluence and its impact on parenting are discussed. Dr. Levine writes, “We have to be acutely attuned to our own psychological issues and our own happiness, or lack of it. We have to be willing to take an unflinching look at our parenting skills.”
Dr. Reedy talks about the similarities between friendship and the ideal ways to treat a child. Healthy boundaries are similar for both. Reedy also talks about how best to lead and mentor children.
Dr. Reedy talks about what traits, processes and skills make for a good therapist in conjunction with or following Evoke Therapy Programs. Flexibility and meeting the client where they are at are two of the many qualities he suggests to look for. Principally, look for a therapist who looks for you.
What is the difference between substance abuse and more severe forms of addiction? How does the treatment approach differ when treating someone using or abusing substances compared to someone who is addicted? What is the family's role in treatment of addiction? Dr. Reedy answers these and explains that the root of addiction is in the thinking rather than the consumption of alcohol or drugs.
Dr. Reedy reviews The Anatomy of Peace, written by the Arbinger Institute. This book talks about regarding others, our children, with a new sensibility. The authors suggest that when we hold them in a place of love and empathy, children are more likely to feel moved to accept invitations for changing their lives.
Dr. Reedy discusses behavioral vs. relational approaches to therapy and how concepts can be extrapolated to apply to parenting. He also talks about the evolution of wilderness therapy over the last 22 years.
This broadcast is to prepare parents and family members of Evoke clients for a visit to the field. Approaching the visit with an open mind and prepared to work are key ideas that will make the visit successful. Dr. Reedy discusses other skills and tools that will help to make the visit rich and meaningful.
Dr. Reedy reviews the book by Shefali Tsabary, "The Awakened Family: How to Raise Empowered, Resilient, and Conscious Children." He discusses mindfulness in parenting, learning how to avoid reactiveness, and how the foundation of optimal parenting is based in the practice of focusing on one's own work and healing.
Dr. Reedy completes his series on Nurture Shock, talking about the chapter on The Science of Teen Rebellion. Neuro-biological issues as well as how parents can reconsider the value of conflict and oppositionality in a child's development are discussed.
In the second part of his review of "Nurture Shock," Dr. Reedy discusses why children lie and how parents can best encourage honesty.
Dr. Reedy discusses the first chapter in Nurture Shock: "The Inverse Power of Praise." Self-esteem, growth mindset, and how to and not to praise children to increase resiliency, frustration tolerance, and effort are discussed.
Dr. Reedy shares some thoughts from the book, The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran, and he makes connections to the work children and parents are doing at Evoke Therapy Programs.
Dr. Reedy answers questions from siblings and extended family related to a student or client at Evoke Therapy Programs. Length of stay, aftercare, answering questions from friends, and a typical day are all discussed.
Dr. Reedy draws upon the epic story of Star Wars to highlight the processes that parents go through in dealing with children struggling with mental health and addiction issues. Yoda and Darth Vader become the archetypes of love and fear in our journey. Reedy also shares concepts from Joseph Campbell and the hero's journey, which informed George Lucas and his telling of this classic story.
Dr. Reedy talks about and answers parents' questions about school refusal and academic failure. He encourages parents to utilize resources and to seek for underlying issues that lead to school problems. He talks about holding boundaries without fear and control.
Dr. Reedy shares the Loving Kindness Meditation, or "Metta," it's history, some examples and how evidence shows it improves our mental and physical health. Evoke parents are encouraged to practice this meditation. Evoke students and clients are introduced to it in the wilderness.
Dr. Reedy talks about the theory of wilderness therapy and the virtues of the nomadic, primitive living model for treating mental health and addiction issues in adolescents and young adults.
Dr. Reedy takes questions from friends and family members of Evoke's clients. He talks about length of stay, trust, the value of educational consultants, and the pros & cons of aftercare placement.
Dr. Dr. Brad Reedy will does a book review of Harriet Lerner’s The Dance of Fear. He discusses how unhappiness is fueled by three key emotions: anxiety, fear, and shame. They are the uninvited guests in our lives. When tragedy or hardship hits, they may become our constant companions. No one signs up for anxiety, fear, and shame, but we can’t avoid them either. As we learn to respond to these three key emotions in new ways, we can live more fully in the present and move into the future with courage, clarity, humor, and hope.
Dr. Reedy explores Evoke's approach to parent and family support. He explains how parent education must go be simple skills and tools and explore underlying motives to be effective. He encourages parents to do their own work for it's own sake: be a better parent means being a better person.
Dr. Reedy talks about divorce, how to navigate blended family issues, and effective co-parenting.
Objectification is to treat another person like an object, because of a lack of empathy, lack of reciprocity or lack of connection. This webinar describes in great detail the objectification cycle that people get stuck in and the effect it has on relationships. The cycle begins with a person experiencing hurt, learning ways not to feel the hurt, and then seeing other people the way one see oneself, and treating them accordingly. With this assumption that others don't feel hurt as well, one begins to treat others like an object. This webinar explores ways to address the objectification of others and gives parents some tools to help interrupt the cycle. This webinar could be helpful for parents with children that lack remorse, empathy, feelings or connection and also for the porn-addicted. This is for parents that have a hard time differentiating between their child's successes and failures and their own. This is for parents that view their child's anger and fear as something they as parents did wrong, and those that struggle to not see their child as a reflection of them. It is for parents that need some help fostering an environment where objectification isn't happening.
Dr. Reedy discusses trauma and the effect it has on our brains and our functioning. He talks about how to treat and respond to those who suffer with PTSD. He also talks about the effect that trauma has on parents as they experience it in the wake of their child's dangerous behaviors.
Dr. Reedy discusses Autism Spectrum Disorders, Non-Verbal Learning Disability and Asperger Syndrome, and how to respond in a helpful way, both as a therapist and as a parent.
Talking about the bullies and the victims of bullies: Dr. Reedy discusses how to foster empathy in your child and how to respond to your child if you think they might be a victim of bullying.
Dr. Reedy talks to parents about dynamics and how to cope with a child who struggles with self-harm and suicidal ideation.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses Dr. Harriet Lerner's book, "Why Won't You Apologize?" Shame, guilt, and how to offer an apology without messing it up are discussed.
Dr. Reedy takes live questions and talks about a typical day, how primitive living programs work, how we can embrace our imperfections and vulnerabilities, and how a group is chosen for each client.
Dr. Reedy discusses the continuum of care that most families at Evoke traverse and the thinking that goes into the decision making along the way.
Dr. Brad Reedy, Evoke's Co-founder and Clinical Director, answers questions from parents on topics including aftercare, length of stay, parent curriculum and blame, al-anon, and the stigma of therapy.
Dr. Reedy discusses communication theory and some basic communication tools that can help us improve our intimacy and our awareness.
Dr. Reedy explains Family Systems Theory and how it impacts therapy and treatment. Principles such as homeostasis, triangulation, boundaries, differentiation, and punctuation help us to understand how our children operate inside a system and how a family intervention can be more effective than an individual intervention.
Dr. Reedy discusses the foundation of a healthy relationship: a more aware, enlightened and whole self. He talks about the need to develop a better idea of one's history and childhood in order to provide a healthy attachment experience for our children.
Dr. Reedy reviews and share his thoughts on this book that serves as a sequel to the Knight in Rusty Armor. It is a powerful illustration of the transformation that can occur as we seek after our own truth on the journey to save a loved one suffering with mental health and addiction issues. Juliet lets go of the life she had planned and life she knew to embrace a new life with a larger capacity to see and love others.
Dr. Reedy review the Knight in Rusty Armor and the lessons from the book. He also discusses Joseph Campbell's model of the Heroic Journey and how it can apply to our lives as we walk our own path of truth towards enlightenment.
Dr. Reedy discusses the audio book by Thich Nhat Hanh, "Mindfulness and Psychotherapy" and teaches parents how to reduce suffering and find peace in the present moment while parenting a child struggling with mental health and addiction.
Parents eavesdrop as Dr. Reedy talks to Field Staff about their role and challenges of being a working in that capacity in Evoke's wilderness therapy programs. He discusses, burn-out, countertransference, letting-go of the outcome, doing your own work, and what place techniques play in therapy.
Dr. Reedy discusses issues in emerging adulthood and challenges the concept of "failure to launch." After understanding young adults through the lens of psychology, sociology, anthropology and biology, parents are encouraged to look at their judgments, expectations, and relationship dynamics.
Dr. Reedy talks with siblings, family members and friends of Evoke clients and addresses their concerns and helps them understand how they can best support the client.
Dr. Reedy discusses the dynamic of the identified patient and implications for a family systems based treatment model. This is a great listen for individuals who are struggling with a loved one stuck in self-defeating and self-sabotaging patterns.
Accountability is one of the main program themes at Evoke. Join Dr. Reedy as he talks about how we teach accountability in the wilderness. He will also discuss the Letter of Awareness, one of our program assignments: the intention and process around the letter.
Dr. Reedy talks about the dynamics between parents and children and how children gain access the the "buttons" that represent a parent's vulnerabilities. Projective identification is explained. He also explains how to avoid falling into old patterns.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses “The Parent Meeting.” What you need to know before you visit your child in the field or before you pick them up. He will talk about assertive communication, the perfect parent, the wellness cycle, and doing your own work.
Dr. Reedy discusses the first letter parents write to their child, The Hopes and Intentions Letter, after sending them to Evoke Therapy Programs. Emphasizing love and decreasing shame and guilt are key ingredients at encouraging and facilitating change to a loved one struggling with mental health or addiction issues.
Dr. Reedy describes how to go about selecting the best fit aftercare for your child following Evoke Therapy Programs. The role of educational consultants and what questions to ask, as well as various features of treatment programs are discussed.
Dr. Reddy reviews the book Motivational Interviewing for parents and how this way of being with a child reduces defensiveness, resistance and promotes healthy changes in the child. Motivational Interviewing is a book by Rollnick and Miller.
Evoke Therapy Programs provides support for siblings of students and clients in wilderness therapy. Dr. Reedy answers live questions from parents and siblings of Evoke clients. With ages ranging from 10-29 years-old, Dr. Reedy answers the question "How can I best support my brother?" and "What if my sister doesn't change?" Dr. Reedy also responds to parents' questions about siblings including, "My child doesn't want to talk about or get updates on his brother? How can I encourage him to open up?"
Dr. Reedy discusses DBT, the history and foundation and how the principles can help in everyday parenting challenges. Mindfulness, skill building, attachment and radical acceptance are discussed.
Dr. Reedy discusses joining in therapy and how parents can apply those same principles in parenting. He makes the suggestion that more than bing the "glue" in therapy, joining is the connection to healing. "Hold on to theory and techniques lightly," knowing that attachment injuries can be repaired in the context of a loving and compassionate relationship.
Dr. Brad Reedy will discuss the initial 48 hour assessment, daily health assessments, and basic protocols (hiking, food, medical, etc.) along with emotional safety, and how Evoke provides an emotionally safe environment in the wilderness.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses how families can best use Educational Consultants during the wilderness process and beyond. He goes into detail about the role an Educational Consultant (interventionists, home therapists etc) plays in collaboration with wilderness programs, while your child is here, and then how these Consultants guide your family to choose appropriate, issue-focused assistance in residential care. These people know the aftercare program options profoundly - they know the people involved and the "backstories" creating the program's milieu. Dr. Reedy goes into detail about how you can leverage these Ed Consultants' knowledge and power best
Dr. Brad Reedy does a book review on “Twenty Things Adoptive Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew” by Sherrie Eldridge. This book was written by a woman who was adopted herself, gives voice to children's unspoken concerns, and shows adoptive parents how to free their kids from feelings of fear, abandonment, and shame.
Dr. Reedy will discuss many issues surrounding sexual orientation, sexual identity as well as sexual issues that are effecting young people today. He will talk about sexual trauma, promiscuity, pornography and paraphillias. Parents will come to understand how to talk to children about many of these sensitive topics and will develop a deeper understanding of sexually related topics.
Dr. Reedy addresses the impact of family of origin and its relevance in wilderness therapy. He discusses events and stressors and the processes that create healing and growth. Family systems and adaptation will be introduced. Differentiation and generational transmission are discussed, along with typical patterns of transmission. The focus is ultimately on the self and looking inward while joining a child in the change process.
Enrolling your child in an out-of-home placement can be a very difficult and frightening process. Dr. Reedy defines bonding and attachment while providing understanding how conflict and listening skills increase closeness and intimacy in all our relationships. You will learn how participation in this program creates a greater sense of intimacy and connection between parents and children. You will learn new tools and skills to provide a more authentic and stable relationship with your child. You will come to understand how physical distance from your child does not equate to creating distance in the relationship. Understanding how a parent's fear, guilt, and dependence on the child for approval are barriers to closeness. You can learn to let go and in that process experience a rebirth in the relationship with your child.
Dr. Reedy starts this webinar with cautions about expectations of both parent and child's regression and the stress inherent in moving out of the structure of the field program and into a new dynamic of face-to-face Transition. The Transition Process is purposely designed to allow this, or even invite this tension, as an opportunity for the parent and child to practice new skills. This said, the program recommends you keep the transition seamless, focused and not distracting and tangential, without extended days away or "making it special" - in order to reduce the extent of regression. (Included are some logistics and philosophy preparations, as well).
Dr. Brad Reedy will explore themes of forgiveness and it's relationship to grace. Dr. Reedy will talk about how through mindfulness we can learn to practice gratitude. He will discuss how gratitude is evidence of emotional and mental health. He will also debunk the idea that we should tell people that they "should" feel grateful.
Dr. Reedy will discuss the systemic dynamics when one member of a family develops a disorder that requires attention in treatment. He will discuss ways to understand how this role is solidified by homeostasis. Beneath his/her symptoms, there can lie a treasure for the whole family. Moving from the identified patient to the family hero, he will explore how to exit the simplistic paradigm of the identified patient model.
Dr. Reedy offers an indepth discussion about Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and how it relates to traumas our students have suffered. He will illustrate how the psyche manages extremely potent emotional energy, the repercussions of that new stasis (internally and inter-personally) and the treatments for PTSD.
Dr. Reedy discusses what our Wilderness Intensive entails and what you can gain from participating. Families, parents, and individuals are able to "unplug" and participate in a powerful learning experience. Each of our intensives helps participants develop awareness about the impact of their unique history and family of origin on present-day challenges and relationships. Through this guided exploration of the self, participants will find a sense of liberation and hope where there might now be angst and suffering.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses the challenges facing families with an individual struggling with dysthymia, depression or bipolar disorders. He will discuss the tasks for parents and family members in treatment, how to understand family roles/rules, and how to interrupt unhealthy communication patterns. This is aimed at empowering parents and identifying behaviors and patterns in the parenting system.
Dr. Reedy will explain empowerment. He will discuss feeling good about boundaries and letting go of perfection, which allows parents to do their best. Dr. Reedy will also talk about sources for parent support, and the traps in selfless parenting.
Dr. Reedy discusses how you can best influence and impact your child’s mind and behavior. He discusses behavioral theory as well as the most effective ways to facilitate change in our youth.
Dr. Reedy will discuss the paradigm shift that children and their families experience as they engage in wilderness therapy. This process will ask you to redefine success from the destination to the journey. Dr. Reedy will discuss how Evoke will provide new tools and new awareness toward that end.
Dr. Reedy will discuss how and why wilderness therapy is so effective. He will talk about how experiential therapy is effective at bypassing resistance and accessing trauma in order to heal. Removal of distractions, positive peer culture, mentoring, and the group microcosm all play an important role in the wilderness experience.
Dr. Reedy describes the different phases of growth during a stay at Evoke. He will cover the general stages that students and clients go through as well as answer any questions you have.
Brad discusses when regression happens, why it's an important part of the process, and how to compensate. He explains how relapse is a part of recovery and how parents can respond to the pressures of change.
Dr. Reedy explores the concepts of Guilt and Shame. Are they the same? Dr. Reedy will talk about what guilt and shame are and how they effect us as individuals. He will also discuss how guilt and shame effect parenting and how to avoid using them as a parenting tool.
Dr. Reedy opens the discussion with a summary of the book "Making Peace with your Plate" by Robyn Cruze and Espra Andrus. The conversation then expands into the "3 Tier Approach"™, the authors' organizational approach to educate, manage and then practice Recovery from Eating Disorder. Unlike other addictive issues, individuals with eating disorders can't get away from food. Body image refers to a person's perception of his or her body which can be dramatically different from reality. Body Image is not typically about the body but the underlying issues and insecurities. It is crucial to treat those primary issues and not just the symptoms. It becomes important to challenge these individuals and resist treating them like they are fragile.
Dr. Brad Reedy will answer any questions related to siblings, from siblings, from extended family members, and about extended family members.
Dr. Brad Reedy will provide an overview of common emotions that parents experience from their children. He focuses on the curriculum, which teaches connecting emotions to symptoms and behaviors through the Wellness Cycle, owning emotions through communication tools taught in the group culture, and learning to tolerate emotional discomfort.
Fears and Insecurities is a commonly used assignment in the field. Dr. Reedy will discuss the intention behind the assignment. As parents, this process and being vulnerable with our children, can cause anxiety and fear. He will also discuss ways to face that fear.
Dr. Brad Reedy does a book review and discussion on "The Drama Of The Gifted Child" by Alice Miller. He talks about why he feels it is so important to the work we ask parents and their children to do. "Far too many of us had to learn as children to hide our own feelings, needs and memories skillfully in order to meet our parents' expectations and win their love."
Dr. Reedy will discuss attachment theory and how it informs parents and therapists in treatment. He will provide practical guidance regarding connecting with children and communication skills. Dr. Reedy will explain how understanding our own history as parents leads to a greater capacity to respond to our children's needs rather than acting in response to our own childhood issues.
Dr. Reedy discusses Communication Skills and Principles. He talks about the "I feel" statement step by step. We will learn why communication is important and provides families with a framework for connecting, working through unpleasant feelings, and coming to a greater sense of self-awareness. Healthy communication skills and principles will help families lay a foundation for dealing with conflict in constructive ways.
Dr. Reedy discusses Anxiety, one of the most common mental illnesses. He talks about how it affects the daily lives of many people and what it is like to parent a child with anxiety. He will give tips on how to manage that.
Dr. Reedy discusses his "learn how to think about parenting" concept and redefining what your role is. Included are some overt principles and practices for families to untangle some of the confusing dynamics and for parents to clearly demonstrate healthy role-modeling around boundaries, self-esteem, emotional experience, interactions and agreements.
Dr. Reedy starts by reviewing Kohlberg's Theory of Moral Development, clearly identifying the scope of personal identity with one's reaction to punishment, then affirmation, and finally the reciprocity of relationship, and Conscience. He quickly compares Maslow's development and the child's experience of the woods (without creature comforts). Brad explains Evoke's admonishment about using Imperatives - in contrast to speaking universally ("should", etc.).
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses What is Your Work? He talks about the things you can do that can help you and support you during this process.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses understanding how to meet resistance in ways that don't make it worse. He talks about everyone having resistance and as a parent how to not provoke it or have a power struggle around it.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses the unsung heroes of wilderness therapy - the Field Instructors. He will discuss their approach to wilderness and your children but also the evolution that each Instructor goes through to reach the Senior and Mentor levels. These folks are with your kids when they've forgotten they're "in therapy" and often show their true colors or share their true insecurities, and regularly make their greatest breakthroughs.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses the book "You Are Here" by Thich Nhat Hanh. It is an application of Buddhist principles and mindfulness on parenting.
Dr. Brad Reedy talks about boundaries. Many parents struggle with boundaries. What is an appropriate boundary? What is fair? What is best for my child? And even...What is a boundary? He will discuss and define boundaries based on the work of Salvador Minuchin and other family therapy pioneers.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses Transitions. He combines a few webinars, talking about all different kinds of transitions, from our program to another program, from our program to home, and transitions in general.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses Enmeshment. He delves into the theoretical background of family system theory, highlighting how lack of boundaries and enmeshment affects relationships. Specifically, he reviews Murray Bowen and Salvador Minuchin's Family Systems model on enmeshment and describes the the healthy tension of intimacy.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses the 4 R's Assignment. He talks about the parent child relationship and communication in conjunction with the assignment and field visit.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses Twisted Thinking. He talks about the kinds of thinking errors that lead to problematic behavior and painful emotions. All-or-nothing, black and white, over generalizing, minimizing, and personalizing are some examples of cognitive distortions that contribute to poor coping.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses Stages of Change. He talks about Prochaska's model for change and explains each stage and related behaviors, emotions, and cognitions.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses Grief and Loss, it is not just about death or loss of a loved one. The signs and symptoms of unresolved grief are depression, anxiety, self-harm, substance abuse and oppositional defiant behaviors.
Dr. Brad Reedy introduces the Shadow concept used by Carl Jung as a way of exploring split off parts of ourselves that we need to befriend, own, and integrate to be whole as individuals. We will focus on shame, projections, exaggeration, excessive or impulsive behaviors.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses the Good Fight- the Process of Change in Families. He confronts the self-defeating myths of Equality or Trust as metrics for how well you are parenting.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses the Awareness Wheel, a frame work for understanding the "I feel Statement". The first step towards comprehending the "Truth" about yourself is to understand your own filters. Our task is to be intentional with communication and know ourselves, so that we can honestly attempt to understand another.
Dr. Brad Reedy reviews the book "Addictive Thinking" by Abraham J. Twerski. He discusses how self-deceptive thought can undermine self-esteem and threaten the sobriety of a recovering individuals and offers hope to those seeking a healthy and rewarding recovery.
Dr. Reedy reviews and discusses the book Non-VIolent Communication by Marshall Rosenberg. He discusses effective ways to express needs without the unwanted side-effect of triggering others defenses.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses adjusting to and working in aftercare. He talks about the typical adjustments and struggles and the process you go through in aftercare.
Dr. Reedy will be doing a book review, "Way of the Peaceful Warrior" by Dan Millman. He talks about a few basic principles this book teaches, and gives an outline of the story. This is an invitation to read the book.
Dr. Reedy will discuss how to be "a healthy container". He will talk about the therapeutic model itself: the purposeful, open inquiry that therapists practice in order to empathize and understand without becoming entangled in the narrative. He will suggest strategies and guidelines to assist you in developing this difficult skill with your child, spouse, and other loved ones.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses Co-Parenting. Effective co-parenting can be difficult for all families not just families that are split or just have a single parent in the household. It is important for parents not to put their children in the middle of their conflict or disagreements about how to best parent. It is important to be a part of the solution not the problem.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses Johari's Window. He talks about the four different windows and how this concept is often used in wilderness.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses Manipulation. He talks about how manipulation is something to influence or motivate someone and how both parents and children play a part. Parents can resist manipulation by knowing yourself, sticking together, focus on what you do, and focus on your intentions rather than outcomes.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses the book "Leadership and Self-Deception." He touches on the book and invites you to read it as well.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses the "Four Agreements" book. He talks about how parents and children use this book through the process at Evoke. This webinar is like the cliff notes to the book.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses the Dynamic of Self and Intimacy. He talks about intimacy and how it also relates to your relationships with your children.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses self-esteem. He talks about one of the simplest struggles that almost everyone deals with.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses coming home after Evoke, instead of aftercare. He talks about how to be the most successful and how to support your child.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses Psychology and Therapy. He talks about the difference between the two.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses Containing, creating emotional safety in relationships. He talks about how you react, feel, and think about someone and creating a safe place.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses letters from siblings. He talks about the questions that siblings may have when their brother or sister enters the program.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses Academics and Therapy. He talks about school struggles, one of the most common complaints on applications.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses parental grief. He talks about the loss of identity, and letting go to from a new relationship with our child.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses trama and abuse. He talks about defining trauma, what it does to our bodies and treating it.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses 12 steps for everyone. He talks about the underlying principles, and debunks the myths of the 12 steps.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses treatments failures and multiple primary care placements. He talks about how to think about relapse or multiple attempts, and the transformation that is required.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses control versus influence. He talks about having a healthy impact on our children without controlling them.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses 12 things not to say to your children. He talks about understanding what is said versus what we mean to say.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses how long my child needs to be in treatment. He talks about the length of stay at Evoke and recommendations for aftercare.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses guilt, blame and accountability. He talks about parents being held hostage by their own guilt and not having boundaries with their children, and how to create accountability.
Dr. Reedy discusses the new book by JD Gill, "Seeing." He talks about what it means to see someone and how that affects the development of self. Shame, capacity, and flexibility are also discussed.
Dr. Reedy discusses accountability and how we can model it for our children. Accountability is best supported with compassion rather than in a context where there is a lot of shame and judgement.
Dr. Reedy discusses depression and how to respond to our children in order to avoid inadvertently reinforce unhealthy behaviors.
Dr. Reedy discusses siblings, their relationship to family members in treatment and how to best support a sibling. He provides an empowering message for siblings and a liberating message for parents. He addresses questions submitted by siblings who have a brother or sister in wilderness therapy.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses vulnerability. He talks about the fear, feeling of rejection, or being judged while being vulnerable.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses adjusting to out of home placement. He talks about the first week of adjustment in Evoke Therapy Programs.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses Evoke's Therapy Model. He talks about what distinguishes Evoke's Wilderness Program from different models.
Dr. Reedy discusses the relationship between self-care and boundaries. He talks about how boundaries translate into limits and consequences in parenting.
This broadcast is based on a recent talk where Dr. Reedy was asked to talk to a community that suffered an overdose. He discusses the basic principles and tools that will help to open up communication surrounding substance use and abuse with children.
Based on his 20 years working with families in wilderness therapy, Dr. Reedy outlines and discusses his new book for parents, The Journey of the Heroic Parent: Your Child's Struggle and the Road Home. He talks about learning to think in new ways and to embrace the lessons offered by dealing with a child who struggles with mental health or addiction issues.
Dr. Reedy discusses the goal of therapy: to help one develop a sense of self. He contrasts this with problem-solving and advice-giving and explains how those endeavors miss the mark.
Dr. Reedy discusses typical ways students and clients progress through the program. He discusses length of stay and how parents decide it is the right time to move to the next step.
Dr. Reedy discusses siblings, their relationship to family members in treatment and how to best support a sibling. He provides an empowering message for siblings and a liberating message for parents. He addresses questions submitted by siblings who have a brother or sister in wilderness therapy.
Dr. Reedy discusses writing letters to your children while in the wilderness. He also offers some guidelines for phone calls and how to develop a healthy relationship with your children by following some simple principles in communication.
This broadcast is meant to introduce family and friends to Evoke's wilderness therapy. Dr. Reedy discusses the theory of wilderness therapy and the compassion of this approach. He also discusses how to help family and friends understand the benefit of a wilderness intervention.
Dr. Reedy discusses healthy communication and ways we can improve our ability to connect to our children.
Based on the book by Abraham Twerski, Dr. Reedy discuses "Addictive Thinking" and how it can distort the minds of those addicted to drugs and alcohol and how it can affect loved ones dealing the codependency.
Dr. Reedy talks about goals and how people move through the process of change. He talks about how we are often seduced by promises and apologies and invites parents to take a step back and adopt a posture of "we'll see."
Dr. Reedy discusses authoritarian, authoritative, permissive, and uninvolved parenting styles. He discusses the characteristics and the effects of each style on children.
The Knight in Rusty Armor is an allegory that illustrates the transformation one goes through when one searches for their own truth. Great podcast and read for anyone seeking to embark on a journey of self-discovery.
This broadcast is the follow-up to The Knight in Rusty Armor podcast. It should be listened to after The Knight in Rusty Armor. As a sequel to The Knight in Rusty Armor, Juliet travels her own journey to discover love and her own contribution to the dynamics in her marriage.
Dr. Reedy discusses the purpose and value of Evoke's Parent Support groups and what parents can expect when they attend. Evoke host parent groups nationwide for current and alumni families to gather for education and connection.
Dr. Reedy talks about the need to discover the essence of one's self in order to see someone else clearly.
Dr. Reedy discusses personality disorders: how they form and how we treat them. In addition, he discuses the common traps in responding to our children and loved ones who struggle with these traits and diagnosis.
Dr. Reedy discusses helpful ways to make the transition from wilderness therapy to the next setting. He discusses common pitfalls parents and children make. He also talks about the similarities of transitions for adolescents and young adults.
Dr. Reedy discusses healthy detachment and the role of parents with children who struggle with behavioral, mental health and substance abuse problems.
Dr. Reedy discusses clinical resistance and how to respond to it as a therapist and parent. He explains how parents can respond to their children's mental health issues and addictions without engaging in a power-struggle.
Dr. Reedy reviews the amazing book from Daniel Siegel and Mary Hartzell, "Parenting from the Inside Out." The authors of this book explore how a parents ability to explore their own childhood and heal their own attachments has an impact on their ability to parent and form healthy attachment with their children.
In part 2 of his book review, "Parenting from the Inside Out," Dr. Reedy discusses the impact on children when parents explore their own trauma and childhood.
Dr. Reedy talks about how and why we self-sabotage and how this understanding can lead to a more helpful response to our children's behaviors.
Dr. Reedy answers questions from siblings and family members about having and supporting a loved one in treatment. He discusses vulnerability and the need for everyone to have some shared understanding of tools and insights in order to connect.
Dr. Reedy talks about the pitfalls of trying to be "right" in our relationships. Rather than being right, learning to be a self in our relationships is preferred. He explains how this need comes from a poor sense of self in the parents and can lead to a poor sense of self in the child.
Dr. Reedy discusses how we can develop gratitude in our lives though mindfulness and by learning to feel all our feelings. He also discusses the challenges of gathering family together during this holiday season.
Dr. Reedy, Clinical Director and CO-founder of Evoke Therapy Programs, talks about the role of fathers in a son's development. He talks about the impact of a father who can be vulnerable and listen.
Dr. Reedy discusses the concept of self care and how it can contribute to healthy parenting. Dr. Reedy is the Clinical Director and Co-founder of Evoke Therapy Programs.
In the wake of the election, Dr. Reedy talks about how our society is divided and how this compares to families. He describes the solution to the divide: love and understanding.
Dr. Reedy talks about Evoke's programming for parents and young adults. In addition, he talks about family systems, shame, guilt, and how parents are supported without judgement. He also explains the need for a parent to do work on their family of origin in order to be a more effective parent.
Dr. Reedy explores the relationship between listening and connection; listening and resiliency; listening and esteem; and listening and healing trauma. He talks about the skill and the barriers to listening including our own wounded selves.
Dr. Reedy discusses the theory behind wilderness therapy and how it works to heal young people. Goals of wilderness therapy and aspects that make it effective are discussed as well as what we can take home in our daily lives.
Dr. Reedy talks about how we help children change from a blame (external locus of control) to a sense of empowerment (internal locus of control). Esteem, self-efficacy and how parents inadvertently teach children to blame us for their feelings are discussed.
Dr. Reedy talks about boundaries and parenting. He discusses the difference between a boundary and a limit. He describes the do's and don't and the most common mistakes we make when talking about boundaries and setting them in our relationships.
Dr. Reedy talks about how the opposite of addiction is not sobriety. The opposite of addiction is connection. He discusses the need to reconnect with passion and purpose as a part of recovery and how loved ones can play a role in that connection.
From the Evoke Webinar Series and based on the book, "The Dance of Anger" by Harriet Lerner, Dr. Reedy talks about healthy boundaries for parents.
Dr. Reedy explores the place of behavioral theory in treatment programs and parenting. He warns against all or nothing when considering the place for reinforcement. Talks about how child development and research can inform both parents and professionals in their use of behavioral techniques.
Dr. Reedy talks about the struggle parents encounter in dealing with a child's regression and relapse in therapy and recovery.
Dr. Reedy talks about the 8 simple tools he has discovered that can make a difference in any relationship.
Dr. Reedy discusses how entitlement is created and fostered in families. He discusses how many parents substitute shame and emotional coercion for healthy boundaries and how narcissism is formed in parents and children.
Dr. Reedy talks to parents about moving through forgiveness with a troubled teen. He also talks about trust as a gift rather than something that is demanded.
This is a recording of the Webinar broadcast for Evoke Therapy Programs on Wednesday, September 21st, 2016. Dr. Reedy discusses the work that couples must do while their child is getting treatment in order to avoid old patterns. Dr. Reedy will address the following issues: What is a parenting issue? What is my child's issue? And how do marital issues show up when a child is struggling with mental health and addiction issues?