Bite-sized knowledge nuggets, practical tools, and easy to implement ideas that will for sure fast track your results.
You have a lot going on at work, at home, in your business. It can all feel overwhelming to try and balance it all. I am here to help!
I am going to give you effective and practical tools that you can implement today and start seeing results today.
You DO NOT need to spend hours a day working on feeling better...10 minutes!
Who doesn't have 10 minutes?
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Having goals, achieving the goals and setting new goals is an excellent vehicle for growth. I am alwaysblown away by the idea that you are 42% more likely to achieve a result when you simply write it down.
You don’t even have to read it every day. Just write it down.
Just as important as having a goal, in my opinion as a goals expert, is taking a break. A planned break.
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We just celebrated our 22nd anniversary and I thought it would be fun to talk a little bit about relationships over time. Enjoy!
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Celebrating St. Patrick's days conjures up the idea of the being lucky, and we see lucky horse shoe type of décor all around us. We wear green for luck, I don’t even knowwhat else we do off of the top of my head but…luck is top of mind with this holiday. I thought it would befun to give you a reminder of 4 ways to Create your more luck.
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We just celebrate Valentines Day in February and so I thought I would be fun to continue the discussion and talk about the most impactful love. Self-Love.
What comes up for you when I say that, when you hear those words, what are your thoughts.
Now, I will admit that the term self-love used to make mebristle. If I think about it too much, it still does. It is some of the work that I still do.
Let's dive in and talk about why it's so important and how to start.
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This is the month of love. It’s February and it's Valentine's, and this is the month that we celebrate love. This is a relationship holiday for most of us and so I thought it would be fun to talk about your relationship with your goal, and how to have a better one.
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When you think about where you are now and where you want to be in any area of your life whether it’s making more money or losing weight or living in the house of your dreams, have that degree, landing that dream job… it’s easy to start to feel like your goal is out of reach.
Today, am going to talk about what the gap trap is,why it’s harmful and I will give you 6 steps to overcoming the gap trap.
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Do you have goals that never seem to materialize? You may be in a state of fantasy vs goal setting. In todays episode, we will talk about how to tell the difference, and I will give the secret on how to move from fantasy into goal getting.
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Today I am going to walk you through the process I do eachyear to wrap up the year, but also to set up the next year. We are going to do a year in review.
The reason this is so important is because your brain doesnot do a great job keeping track of your accomplishments as well as it does our failures and it’s important to know how far we have come and what we have accomplished this year in order to set the stage for next year.
Your brain is doing its best to keep you in your currentself-image, and if you have been with me for a while, you know that growing in your self-image is the key to creating different outcomes, it’s the key to evolving into the person who can create the result, whatever the resultis. This is a way to show your brain how far you have come and who you are now. Let's dive in!
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This is the time of year if you are listening real time thatfeels a little more…
At times it can feel like more joy, more love, more family…
And… at the same time it can also feel like more work, morefood, more shopping, more stress, more frustration, more chaos… more busy.
Today, I am going to give a mind shift tool that you can usetoday to remove the busy and the chaos from your life and drop you into alignedaction.
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Every year about this time, I notice how we start planningand prepping for the season that will no doubt have us a little busier, a little more financially stretched and in the presence of more people.
Think about it, unless you are an extrovert with more money, and time than you know what to do with, that’s enough to stress anyone out. In this episode, I am going to give you 3 Steps to More Holiday Joy.
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Today we are adding another intention to our year of intentional living and that is Intentional Influence. As humans, we influence, and we are influenced. If you are ready to next level your life, it might be time to explore intentional influence.
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It has never ever been more important to be intentional with your thoughts. We are going through it my friends. Here is why it is so important to manage every aspect ofyour thinking when you are pursuing anything. Your body does not know that your thoughts are not true and so, it responds as if it is. It is how we fire up the hippocampus and it’s how our body starts creating antibodies that attack our bodies. It throws your body into survival mode. It is how disease is created and elongated and prospers in us. I am going to arm you with thoughts that tell your body you have your own back.
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Today, I want to give you a little mind shift around boundaries. We are going to talk about what they really are, and how you can use them to up level your life. I am going to give you a real-life example of a boundary that I recently set, and I will tell you why. A mind left unmanaged is going to be using boundaries all wrong. So buckle up my friends, this topic is bumpy but I promise a smooth landing.
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Even the best goal getters procrastinate…there, I said it, even I procrastinate. Logically, I know that if I just do the thing, whatever the thing is, I will feel a hundred time better. I know that I have already spent more time thinking about the thing than it will take to actually do the thing. In this episode I will give you 6 steps to getting all the things done and overcoming procrastination.
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There are no good emotions or bad emotions, good thoughts or bad thoughts. There are only thoughts and emotions that serve you as youcreate the life of your heart’s desire or thoughts and emotions that do not serve you.
That is it. It is that simple.
I used to think that because I had all of these negative thoughts and emotions that something was wrong with me.
I mean, I would see the evidence in the book stores with aisles and aisles of books devoted to “How to Be Happy.”
I read hundreds of them and none of them said what I am about to say to you… We are supposed to have negative emotions!
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As the titles states, we are going to talk about what to do when you feel like you have been blindsided, knocked on your rear, let down or what I call "sucker punched." Getting sucker punched is no fun, and it can create delays in your progress toward your goals. It can throw a wrench into your best laid plans, and so often it turns into a quit. I am going to give specific things to do, and not do, in order to get right-sided and on track again.
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I started talking about my diagnosis last episode, and since then, so much more has been revealed to me, and it has inspired me to share what I have learned. I am not a scientist so all of this is going to be in very layman terms. In this episode, I am talking about why it's so important now more than ever to create a life by design. It has never been more important to start creating the life of your hearts desire and start causing the effect in your life instead of living at the effect of your life.
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I will be the first to tell you it’s much easier to just live in response to the world around you, but that is not going to help you create a LIFE BY DESIGN. Although I love teaching on time management, and talking about time management skills, today I want to talk about why and how being intentional with your time is so important when you are creating your LIFE BY DESIGN.
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I thought it would be fun to answer some of the questions that I get in my inbox for the benefit of everyone.
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As humans, in general, we have an adversarial relationship with the feeling of pressure. It feels a little negative if we just sit and think aboutpressure. Try it and see what comes up for you. I mean I don’t think anyone sits and thinks about pressure and feels like "oh, that’s exactly what I neededto get me goaling." In fact, when we feel pressure, we can also feel doubt creeping in. In this episode, I am going to give you 2 things to do to help you change your relationship with pressure. Ready?
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I struggled with my relationship with food for most of my life, in fact, until I hit my 50’s and just decided to change how I fueled my body, all I thought about was food. Even when I wasn’t eating it, I was thinking about it. None stop. If this feels like you...Just know that I am determined to give you bite sized knowledge and practical application in each episode. I want you to know that all the things can shift for you in the next moment with this step, this first step. Listen for more...
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In this series, as I give things to do on purpose, deliberately, and you are becoming more intentional with the way that you live your life, you will start to notice the control that you have to really experience your life instead of living at the effect of it. This week I am going to give you the 5thintentional living piece and that is…be intentional with what you surround yourself with. Space Scaping.
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I don’t know who said sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me. Well, that’s not quit true. How we choose to describe ourselves to ourselves, and others, is how we will show to our life. How we choose to describe our life is how our life will be experienced. The self-image that we currently have will determine what we think about ourselves, and it will be how we create our life. Our own self concepts will predict our life, it is our internal life designer. Our self-concepts are nothing more than what we think about ourselves so often that they become who we believe we are. This week I am going to give you tools to help you identify your self-concepts and Word Scape your best life ever.
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Being intentional with your energy is as important as how you fuel your body. We all have things in our lives that we do that don’t necessarily light us up, and those things can create a drain on our batteries. Living intentionally allows us to become very aware of those things and once we are aware, we can manage. Tune in to learn how to create awareness about your own energy, and what to do to create an energetic shift.
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I am sure that you have heard that you become the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with. Really think about that. Now, I am not saying that you need to dump all of your friends, and get a new spouse that improves your averageness but...if you have a goal to have the best year ever, it’s worth taking the time to look at the circle you run in, with whom you are spending the most time with. Are they going where you want to go? Are they going to be adding to your best year ever, or creating a drag in your growth and progress and evolution.
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We have to be the boss of our brains and not let our brains be the boss of us. A brain that is not managed will default to what is easy and familiar even if it’s bad for us. This episode kicks off a series of episodes designed to help you design the exact life of your of your heart’s desire and start living by the standards that you decide on so that you can create the best year ever. And listen, this won’t be the last best year ever that you create…next year can be even better than this year.
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A Greek philosopher said “we become what we pay attention to,” I would add... "we become WHO we pay attention to."
Do you pay more attention to your past self and the negative experiences of yesterday or your future self, that human of a year from now. Just as important as accomplishing tangible things is to think about the person that you will need to become in order to create those results. The person that you will “need to want to become” intentionally, on purpose, deliberately to create those results.
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There is something magical that happens when you set your intention to have the best experience ever and designing and creating the best year ever is no different. This year, I want you to have all the tools that you need in order to create your best year ever. In this episode, I am going to give you the step by step... exactly what I do every year, and it’s what I have been doing for years and years. Maybe 20 years or so now. This is what I continue to study and refine and dial in in order to create the life of my hearts desire, a life by design. It's time to plan and build your LIFE BY DESIGN!
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This is the time of year that we all seem to pick up a little bit of the hustle, and bustle. Although it can be a very joyous time of year, it can also be a very stressful time of year for a variety of reasons. Today I am going to give you some little bite sized knowledge nuggets to help you get through the holiday season this year, and hopefully make this year the best holiday ever.
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Today I want to help you re-write your goal story. You are writing your goal story whether you are aware of it or not. Your brain is like a computer program that runs several operating systems all at the same time. And in the recess of your brain, is the story you are living regarding your goal. Whatever your goal is.
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For this episode, what I would like to do is catch you up with what is going on and teach a few mind shifts that I had along the way that might be helpful and useful to you as well.
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Just as important as having a goal, in my opinion as a goals expert, is taking a break. A planned break. Now don’t misunderstand the difference between a break and a quit. They are not even close. In fact, a break can be exactly what is needed to reenergize your mind and body and get even more closely aligned to your outcome. Taking a planned break is constructive, a quit is destructive. It’s a constructive action to take but only when your thoughts and emotions driving the break are constructive. Listen to learn more about how important planned breaks are and exactly how to plan one.
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“One of the greatest challenges in life is being happy with what you have, while in pursuit of what you want. ~Jim Rohn
Our brain is wired and motivated to seek pleasure, avoid pain and conserve energy, and it’s also motivated to achieve results, acquire more and seek better. When we are in pursuit of whatever the thing is, and we are pursuing it from a state of not having, insufficiency, lack and not enoughenss... we are putting a kink in our hose of abundance. So, how do you pursuit what you want from a place of having, sufficiency and enoughness? Great question!
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Today I want to talk about thoughts that call more abundance into your life and how you can apply them. These are the things that I teach and that I do. It is human nature to be keeping score with what you give and how much effort you put out before you experience a result. We look at the give and take as some sort of currency but here is what I want you to see…when you hold back, you are the one getting short changed.
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“Soul exhaustion can feel as if you're running a marathon without an end. It can seem as if you're treading water for hours in the middle of the ocean — soul exhaustion can feel like you have no more tears left to cry, that your tear ducts are permanently empty, as is your spirit.”
While I was researching for this episode, I found so much information supporting the notion of soul exhaustion, and talking about the difference between physical fatigue, and when your soul is fatigued. If you don’t know whether your soul is exhausted or not, listen on because I am going to talk about the 8 signs that you are exhausted down to your soul, and I am going to give you some key takeaways to help you reset.
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Once again, I am going through some things in real time and sharing with you so here we go.
As we grow and evolve and start really reaching for our Life by Design, and our hearts desire, it may be necessary at some point to take inventory, assess, reevaluate and determine if you are in a state of tolerating things, events, people, habits, thoughts…the list could go on and on but my point is, we need to take inventory and determine if we have pockets of tolerating.
I did that recently and I determined that to be the case…
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My past never feels far away. I have recently become very aware of how much I think about my past. And when we spend so much time thinking about the past, it’s not hard to imagine that we get pulled into that old self-image and identity. When we are trying to build a future result, or create an outcome that we have never created before, especially if it’s something that requires we really stretch and evolve in the process, staying tethered to our past creates a liability and a limitation in creating our future results.
Today we are going to explore why it's so important to build you future from your future and not from your past.
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Yesterday, Steve and I celebrated 20 years of marriage. When I say celebrate, don’t let me give you the wrong impression. We didn’t throw a party or pop a bottle of bubbly. Although, I bought bubbly, we didn’t get around to it. I thought it would be fun to share with you how we experienced our anniversary, maybe give you a few musings on marriage and maybe…there will be a mind shift for you, who knows.
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The week we will be celebrating St. Patrick’s Day, and we humans LOVE to celebrate the luck of the Irish in a big way. Celebrating this day conjures up the idea of the “being lucky” and we see lucky horse shoe type of décor all around us. We wear green for luck, I don’t even know what else we do off of the top of my head but…luck is top of mind with this holiday. I thought it would be fun to give you a reminder of 4 ways to Create Your Own Luck.
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Boy, do I have a doozie of an episode for you! I love to share in real time the things that I am working through in an effort to help you avoid experiencing something similar. What I have been working on lately, I didn’t even know was costing a goal I had been loosely tethered to, but it was. It almost cost me a dream and a heart’s desire…big time.
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This is the month of love…it’s February and Valentines Day! This is a relationship holiday for most of us and so I thought it would be fun to talk about your relationship with your goal, why it's important, and how to have a better one.
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When I was a kid...I watched my dad go to work every day, hating every minute of it. I remember how frustrated and irritated he was about his work. Fast forward, and in his 80's, when he thinks about work today, he thinks... "it wasn't that bad, I really enjoyed a lot of things about my work." What I wish he knew then was that those emotions were always available to him then.
I am sharing that message with you today.
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Here are 25 things that you can do that will for sure kick off this year with a jump start like you have never experienced before. Then...when you start feeling like you need an energetic injection to get you back on track, you can go to this list and decide what you want to incorporate and integrate into your life that will up-level your results.
25 Things List
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There is something magical that happens when you set your intention to have the best experience ever, the best day ever. Let's create the BEST YEAR EVER! I give you 3 easy steps to intentionally create the best year ever, regardless of your current circumstances.
Buckle up friends, this is going to be an energetic ride!
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There are actually several reasons and many ways that we do the Commit and Quit cycle. Today, I am going to boil it down to the biggest and most powerful reason why we commit and then quit.
Thought Ladder Episode #65
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The title of this episode might be having you scratching your head thinking huh? How can positivity be toxic? Well, that is exactly what I am going to talk about today. One of the things that has been coming up with some of my clients and students is the notion that they shouldn’t feel bad or think negative thoughts, and that if they do, something is wrong or something is going wrong, so they rush to make things right again.
They think that to make things right they must hurry through the negative thoughts and emotions and get back to the feel good feelings and then all is right with the world. If that sounds like you my friend, buckle up, this is going to be an enlightening ride.
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I love this time of year for a lot of reasons but most of all because of the spirit of the holiday season. For me, it really starts when I see fall coming and most of us love to experience the change of color of the landscapes and hearing the crunch of the leaves. Even just watching the leaves fall from the trees is a reminder that life is moving, the season is changing.
This is the time of year that there are a lot of religious events and I think it’s safe to say that most of my listening audience is totally down with a good Thanksgiving dinner or 2. It is the holiday season and this year I want to give you three ways that you can ditch the drama.
Episode #34 was published last year and so although it’s a year old…it’s very relevant still. I hope that you enjoy it and I hope that you have the best holiday season EVER!!!
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There is a big difference between expecting to fail and planning for the fail. Expecting to fail is failing ahead of time. Planning for the fail is creating a back up plan or an alternate route, a plan B, a replacement strategy. Today, we are talking about exactly how to plan for the fail and why it matters.
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The part between who you are now and who you are becoming, that is your journey. That is the part that requires all of this mind management. Each time we evolve a little towards the human that we are becoming, we need to let that growth burn in a little bit, set up and take shape. Today, I am going to teach you all about "the burn in" period.
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It seems like lately, I have been coaching on relationships a lot, and one of the things I hear people say is how much that other person is always letting them down or not showing up for them, and how they are disappointed by other people’s behavior. Today, we are going to talk about your velvet rope...boundaries.
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Today, I want to talk about what to do when it feels like people don’t support your goals, your vision, your heart’s desire. This can happen with co-workers not quit being as excited about your ambitions for a promotion as you are. Maybe your boss isn’t too excited about your interest in another department or area of the organization. Maybe, your kids and your spouse aren’t as excited about your new eating protocol as you were hoping.
Feeling like the significant people in our lives don’t support our heart’s desire is not a reason to quit…EVER!!!!
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I do not claim to be lacking in the acting out of impulse category but…to live a life by design, that requires intention. Creating a life by design does not happen by accident. It is created on purpose through a series of decisions that you make, from your prefrontal vs the primal part of your brain where impulse is born. Today, I am going to give you 8 life hacks that will have you living with more intention instead of under the influence of impulse.
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Here is the thing that I have noticed about the thought of being busy or the state of being busy…it doesn’t feel good. If busy made us feel good, I would highly encourage it but, to me, and I think for most of us, busy feels hard, demanding, hectic and it seems like something that most of us try to avoid at the same time that we find ourselves in the midst and mindset of “busy”.
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I use the word “awesome” a lot. I think that a lot of us do, and we do it as a habit response but today I want to talk about some life hacks that can create real awesomeness for you. Why? Here is my case for more awe…We need more goosebumps!
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Today, I want to give you a mind shift about overwhelm so that when you feel yourself in it, and you find yourself telling the story of how overwhelmed you are, you can reach into your arsenal of the 10 minute mind shifts you have experienced, and pull out this little tool… and as I love to say…get over it!
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Today, I want to give you more technical things to do, some tactics to apply that will help you get more done and create more time. It's time to layer on some strategies with that new time management mindset you created last week. This is the EXACT thing that I do week after week after week. I think in terms of outcomes not tasks. I think in terms of what do I want to create or achieve.
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Today, I want to give you mind shift around time and it’s what I have done and do faithfully that has allowed me to have more free time and get more done, in other words…Expand Time. When I say that, your brain my just go what the what? How can you get more done and have more free time. I mean, if you are doing more, aren’t you using more time to do it… The answer is no!
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Your personal brand has been created by how you show up in the world…at work, at home, on social media, in your community. It’s how you dress. How you carry yourself. How you communicate, the words that you use, your tone, how you do you. Your personal brand is the message that you send about how you live your life. Your personal brand tells others how you think about you, but it’s also how you want others to feel around you. Take a look at it and even if it is not exactly what you imagined your brand to be…that’s ok. We can do some incremental up levels and get your brand on track.
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You know what I teach is what I am going through or have gone through at some point in my life. And I have been going through it. Feeling a little off, in a funk, got sucker punched and that can really let the air our of your tires and for sure, you start feeling a little flat, unmotivated, uninspired.
There are days, in fact most days, that I am just not that motivated. Today, I am going to give you two things that I do when I am just not that motivated.
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I don’t know if that has ever happened to you but it has happened to me recently and right now it feels like I have been SUCKER PUNCHED! It feels like an unexpected blow and physically, it feels like I have the wind knocked right out of me.
My guess is that you have experienced that too and so today, I am going to share with you some things that you can think and I am going to give you 5 things that you can do in order to get your life back on track. Nothing slows down progress more that a sucker punch!
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There is a multi billion-dollar industry waiting in line to take our money and exchange for what they market as sell-love and self-care. There is another self that we have that is on the inside that we don’t pay attention to, we ignore, we abandon, we shush…
As human, as women humans especially, we spend a lot of time joosing up the outer parts of us. The part that other people see. We do it thinking and telling ourselves that we are doing it for us, we tell ourselves we do it to make us feel good.
If you are like me, while you may be presenting yourself to the world in the most impeccable manner, impeccably dressed and coiffed, your inner-self maybe due for some maintenance or maybe even a renovation.
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I coach so many women who really have no problem laying it all out there for their kids their spouse, their boss, their community, their church, they are consumed with putting the needs and desires of others ahead of their own. They are considered Self-less. Many times they will tell me that when they think about their own desires they feel selfish and they say it in a way that has a bad connotation to it a bad vibe or ring to it. Today, I want to talk about what it really means to be selfish.
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As we grow and evolve as humans, how we want to experience our life evolves. What we want to experience evolves and who we want to experience our life with may change. Occasionally, it can make us second guess our growth because we start feeling the pull at the parts of us that are no longer aligned with some of our friendships. Today, I am talking about why we hang on to relationships that no longer serve and what to do instead.
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We have our current thought, the one that has us in our current result and then we have the one we know serves us better, It's often quite a jump from the thought we are having now to the ones that will serve us, so how do you do that? Today, I am going to teach you one of the most powerful self-coaching tools there is and that is the “self-coaching thought ladder”.
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The quality of your life is determined by the quality of your energy. The quality of your energy is determined by the quality of your thoughts. Thoughts that don’t serve us create energy leeks.
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All of my life my parents and teachers made it very clear to me that I had a reading comprehension problem and so, that belief stuck with me. Even as an adult, even at the age of 58 years old and all of the evidence to the contrary, I still had the belief. Today, I am going to share with you the exact formula that I use to up level what I believe. This formula is a game changer regardless of how long you have held your current beliefs. Get ready for your next transformation at the speed of life!
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Regardless of what your goal is, many of us have created habits, or behaviors that don’t necessarily support our goal. In fact, they actually create a net negative effect in our life.
Some of these behaviors eat into our health and wellness goal, our wealth creation goal, they can cost us time, energy, and they can cost us the opportunity to live and our highest and best self.
Today, we are going to talk about what buffering is and what to do instead.
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This week and for the last few weeks I have found myself indulging in thought and emotions that do not serve me and so, I went to work and then created this episode. We have talked about so many kind of thoughts on this podcast and today, I am going to share with you one of the most destructive type of thoughts that you can think and that is Petty Thoughts.
My hope is that this episode really opens your mind to observing some of your own thoughts that might…be…well, a little on the petty side.
You are going to learn why these thoughts are so devastating to creating a LIFE BY DESIGN and living a life of balance and abundance, and you are going to learn what to do about them.
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This week, I want to go a little deeper, and share with you some of my my personal notes, my thoughts and feelings as I was on my weight loss journey. I believe that if you know that you are not alone, you will feel inspired to take action one more time for the last time. I want you to know that you can create the exact life experience you desire, and this isn’t about being skinny this is about knowing the power that you have over your results, all of them, including food and weight and cravings and urges..
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My word of the year this year is elegance and one of the most frequent questions that I get is “what do you eat, exactly.” I thought it would be fun to share with you a little bit of my weight journey, eating journey and how I apply my word of the year to eating. I am going to give you 4 simple steps to eating elegantly.
I say simple and for sure, it’s simple, and yet I understand if it doesn’t sound easy. If you are a person who feels consumed by thoughts of food, nothing about food sounds simple or feels easy. I totally get you. That WAS me. That was me for most of my life and for as long as I can remember.
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This is a fun and clever method for setting goals that might be helpful when setting goals feel hard, or you just don’t feel like you know how to set goals. Here is how it works...You simply pick a theme or two for the year and then set goals around those themes. I am going to give you several to choose from but you can you certainly use your own creativity and find something to suit you. Take a listen to hear a new and energizing way to set goals!
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This is a behind the scenes look at what it's like to go for it, go all in, fail, evaluated and try again. You are going to get an inside look at the good the bad, the ugly and the not so glamourous life of my goal. I also give you several lessons I learned along the way. This episode is packed with lots of good stuff! Listen to the end because there is a surprise.
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There's an African proverb that says, “Smooth seas do not make skillful sailors.” I really want you to think about that today, this week and as you pursuit your goals. It's the hard knocks in life that soften out our rough edges. Shape us into something more refined and resilient. It does not matter whether you are an entrepreneur, a musician, a home maker, a student, a clerk, a CEO or your everyday Jane… rising to the occasion, occasionally, especially during times of difficulty is going to be required of you in order to grow and evolve. No one is exempt. Now, your ability to develop your skill at overcoming obstacles and challenges, that is what will set you apart from the average and ordinary. Learn the 7 behaviors of people with high Adversity Quotients.
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In light of my upcoming ride, and my goal for earning my bronze medal, I have a very appropriate mind shift for you. We have talked about so many types of thoughts on this podcast. From the very beginning we have talked about possibility thoughts, decision thoughts, scarcity thoughts, abundance thoughts and commitment thoughts. Today I want to talk about a thought concept that I call “conditional commitment” thoughts.
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In this episode I want to give you another way of looking at growing your self-image so that you can become a match for how you want to experience your life. Here is why it’s important…
“you cannot have what you are not willing to become… vibrationally.” You will not create the life experience, the outcome the LIFE BY DESIGN unless you are willing to become a vibrational match for it.
I know that saying that sounds simple, and it is, but it’s the becoming a match that trips us up. So hopefully, I can give you a mind shift today that makes it all make sense.
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Are we feeling lucky? Or are we feeling a little down on our luck? A few nights ago, I was feeling a little, what I would call melancholy and I started thinking about how fortunate and blessed Steve and I are, some would even say that we are lucky. I know that sometimes it’s hard to feel lucky, especially with so much going on and so I thought it would be fun to talk about how you can create your own luck and good fortune.
“Luck does not discriminate. Luck is the residual of intentional thinking, aligned action and meticulous mind management.” ~janet cagle
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I thought it would be fun to do an episode featuring Beth Harmon. Some of you might be asking who the heck is Beth Harmon. This was my 2020 Netflix binge. The Queen’s Gambit is a series set in the 1950’s and the main character is orphan Beth Harmon. If you are looking for a good binge, I highly recommend this one. You might even want to watch it again after this episode and see if you have your own takeaway moments.
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Since last week when I shared with you all my decision to ride for my 2nd level dressage score during last week’s episode something happened.
In fact, it is very common that when we set our sites on something or really lean into a goal, something happens. That’s what I have experienced, and it actually ties nicely into this week’s episode where I talk about how to deal with life happening in the process of creating an outcome of your heart's desire.
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Have I got an episode for you! I recently threw it out to the universe that I want to ride for my second level scores at the end of April. So, I thought it would be fun to share with you my journey to that goal and I am going to share with you real time the exact approach that I am using in order to create the result.
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This week, I thought it would be fun to give you insight into the Q&A portion of the LIFE BY DESIGN 6 Week Boot Camp. Listen in as I answer questions from a few of the boot campers. Let me know if you experience a mind shift.
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I have wanted to do this topic for a long time but it is such an advanced concept that I didn’t want it to get lost. I teach this concept a lot with my 1:1 students and it’s super powerful once you get it but it’s deep. This week, my husband gave me the perfect example to use and so now I feel equipped to pass along the concept of emotional attachment to outcomes vs being excited for your goal and the results.
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I get these question a lot from my students who are either trying to grow their business or the students who are trying to get the promotion at work…
My answer is: Give it all, every day. Hold nothing back for later, and expect nothing in return for what you give. When I am creating content, I never have the thought that I should save this for my paying clients. The reason that I don’t is that I know that whatever I give will come back to me in the form of even better ideas and deeper concepts for my coaching clients.
I know that what I give creates space for more evolved thoughts and ideas. In this episode I want to talk about how you can apply that concept to your life regardless of where you are in your life.
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This year is the first year that I have ever done a word of the year. I am working on growing my own self-image and self-concepts so much of the self-coaching work that I am doing is centered on that. I have to say that it is creating a shift in me that I am happy to be experiencing and so I want to share some of the concepts with you.
Today, I teach your three things that I an no longer available for.
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Here is your mind shift. All of the emotions that we think we will feel when we get to wherever “there” is, they are available to us right now. The exact experience we think we will experience, is available right now. In fact, our ability to access those feelings and experiences right now, where we are, is what makes the journey more pleasurable, more palatable, faster, more productive and more of the life experience that we are hoping for, when we get there.
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I got a great question this week. “Isn’t having an expectation of achieving a goal setting myself up for failure and heartbreak?” This question is everything my friends. It is at the center of why it’s hard for so many of us to even think about having a dream, let alone go all in on the pursuit of it.
I mean, what if you have this dream and you set this goal and you never hit it your target, then what? Was it all for nothing? Was it a waste of time, energy and money? These are the very thoughts that keep us from even dreaming to begin with.
In this episode I give you a quick mind shift that will for sure put to rest any fear of heart break in pursuit of your dreams and I give you 4 steps to get things going today!
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When I was around her, I found myself just very interested in all the drama going on in her life. I was really giving her my ear and listening to her. I was really sucked into the dramatics and the hysterics of her life. And I would watch this person kind of go after other people in a very, what I would call toxic way, very harmful way. And one of the thoughts that I had was keep your friends close, but keep your enemies closer. So I knew that she always had the propensity to be this kind of evil mean-spirited and just downright villainous type of person.
Today, I am talking about how to handle Toxic people.
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A standard is….level of quality or attainment. Everyone has standards. We all do. The question is, are your standards supporting the life that you want, your dream life, or does your standard support the the life that you have. Are your standards supporting your goals or sabotaging your goals. In this episode I give some ways that you can start bringing your standards up, bring your life up to code.
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When we are trying to create the life of our heart’s desire, we set goals. Some of us have weight goals, relationship goals, health goals, career goals and even business goals. We can get in such a hurry to create the ultimate outcome that the entire process can become and exercise in frustration and impatience and confusion. Those emotions are exhausting, and…so, many times, we just wear ourselves out and give up.
We think what we are doing isn’t working because we aren’t there yet or we think we must not be doing it right or that we picked the wrong goal and the worst thought ever…it just wasn’t meant to be. Let me tell you, none of that is true.
In this episode, I give you a clever analogy to think of when you feel like quitting.
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Fear can be paralyzing, debilitating and for sure can keep us from creating the life of our heart's desire. Fear can interrupt the life of our heart's desire. Fear can control us if we let it. I am working through it myself and I am sharing with you, in real time, as I walk through and work through my own experience with fear. It came on fast, out of nowhere as fear sometimes does. But, we don't have to stay there.
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Fear can be paralyzing, debilitating and for sure can keep us from creating the life of our heart's desire. Fear can interrupt the life of our heart's desire. Fear can control us if we let it. I am working through it myself and I am sharing with you, in real time, as I walk through and work through my own experience with fear. It came on fast, out of nowhere as fear sometimes does. But, we don't have to stay there.
Free Virtual Goal Setting Workshop Replay
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We are energy! We have energy running through us. If you doubt me, rub your feet on some carpet and touch another person. ZAP! For sure you will feel the energy. We create, invite and attract the life in which we are an energetic match to. We create, invite and attract the results right up to the very edge of our current self-image. So, simply put then, it’s our life’s mission to decide what we want and then grow our self-image and show up in the energy that attracts that life, those results.
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This week I give you insight into my goals philosophy. I wrote a goals manifesto in 2017. I review it often and so far, no changes. Enjoy!
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I was doing some research for this podcast recently and I ran across this statement…
“Soul exhaustion can feel as if you're running a marathon without an end. It can seem as if you're treading water for hours in the middle of the ocean — soul exhaustion can feel like you have no more tears left to cry, that your tear ducts are permanently empty, as is your spirit.”
It just so happens that there is tons of information out there all supporting the notion of soul exhaustion, and talking about the difference between physical fatigue, and when your soul is fatigued. Today, I am talking about how to identify Soul Exhaustion, how you got there and then...6 ways to feed your soul instead.
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Where is the universe trying take you, that your ego is resisting? I read that quote the other day and then I had the thought, “that would make a great podcast.” And here we are, this is episode #35 people. I see this with so many people and I have experience it myself. With our knowledge and our intellect, we know better. We know that if we would just do XYZ, and 123 that we would move the needle in our lives one step closer to our goal.
If we moved our body more, cut back on sugar, drank more water, got to work 30 minutes earlier, got to work on time…It’s the very thing we know would move the needle in our lives if we just did it …and yet, we resist. In this episode, I am going to teach you what to do instead.
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This is the time of year that we all seem to pick up a little bit of the hustle and bustle and it seems to be, although a very joyous time of year, it can also be a very stressful time of year for a variety of reasons. I am actually going to talk about the Thought Model today in a much deep way than I ever have before, while I teach you how to "Ditch The Holiday Drama.
Today, we are putting it all together in a Thought Model.
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I had heard several times over the years that I should just forgive and move on, that I would feel better if I just forgave, but I didn’t understand the first step in how you start that process, and I also thought that forgiveness meant so many things that it didn’t mean at all.
I thought it would mean that I was OK with what had hurt me to begin with. That’s not the case. I thought it meant that I accepted what was done and that accepting it meant I agreed or was ok with it. That isn’t true either.
I thought forgiveness was for him, and that it would require a conversation and an apology. Not true either!
Find out what I learned and why you might want to consider your own Forgiveness Journey.
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Who do I want to be right now? How do I want to show up in this experience? What do I want this experience to be for me right now.
The power of the pause is about shifting out of that subconscious, automated and mindless response to life, and things happening to you.
The power of the pause is about shifting into consciousness and really becoming a participant and co-creator of all of the outcomes in our life.
It is how you cause the effect in your life.
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Let’s face it…for some of us, mornings can be hard. Downright intolerable at times. Many of my students and colleagues have the notion that “they just aren’t morning people.”
What are morning people anyway? Can you become a morning person? Listen to hear to find out how.
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So…you wanna fast track your results? Here is exactly how…slow down and give yourself "The Luxury of Time."
I have had that sentence in my head for weeks now and really sitting in how I can create a concept and teach a tool about how to apply the luxury of time to your life. Listen up to see what I came up with for you!
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Doing Hard Things Workbook
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True Story...
She was dating men who were unavailable to her, she was working in an office she didn’t like, living in a house she didn’t like and in her mind, creating a different life was not in the cards. She could not see how it was her thoughts that were creating her results.
Here is where the magic happened for her though. As soon as she was able to stop thinking about what she didn’t want and she started getting into what she did want, she saw a total transformation in her life.
She started visualizing her dream coming true, she started working on herself and becoming a match for the future she wanted to experience.
She wanted to live in Europe and create a Real-estate practice in Europe. She wanted a man who knew and loved her love for business and would support her dream. Within months, she met the man of her dreams and now she is living the life of her dreams in Denmark.
In this episode, I talk about how to access your Future Self now!
Your Future You Workbook
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If you want to attract amazing results and mind blowing levels of abundance into your life, you must tune into a higher vibration. I have 10 actionable things that you can start weaving into your daily life today that will help you raise your vibration and get on the frequency that creates, invites and attracts more abundance into your life.
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I love everything about goals but I get it if you don’t. But that’s why I am here.
I got a great question from a listener that is the genesis of this podcast. Episode #26
“What’s The Point of Goals Anyway? “Goals stress me out. Not having one stresses me out, I think I should have them. Then when I set a goal, that stresses me out. What is going on?”
I am going to answer that for all of you today.
I want you to know two very important facts about goals.
Goals are meant to give your life flavor and texture and color.
Goals are not designed to make you feel worthy and valuable.
You are born 100% worthy and valuable as a human being the moment you were born, before you even make a single contribution to the world, you are 100% valuable and worthy as a human.
Did you know that? Do you feel that? Do you believe that?
The point of a goal is not to up level your self-worth and self value at all.
The only point of the goal is to add flavor and texture and color and interest to your life. That’s it.
The point of a goal is to keep you on the path of learning and growing and stretching yourself to your full potential but not so that you feel more valuable.
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Creating a life that is full of balance and abundance only requires that we deep dive into our thoughts and ferret out the ones that don’t serve us and replace them with thoughts that do serve us. Sounds simple, and it is that simple but, I would not describe the work as easy. However, it is going to be some of the best work you ever do.
If we want to up level our outcomes we have to get really good at recognizing our thought patterns. Specifically, our scarcity thought
patterns and then we need to get really good at redirecting them, editing them, rebooting them, control alt deleting them.
Today we are talking about the 4 reasons that scarcity thoughts prevent our abundance and exactly what to think instead. It is that simple!
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There are many reasons that we say yes when we mean no.
· we want to make people think nice things about us,
· we want to appear willing,
· we don’t want to be judged,
· we want to fit in,
· we don’t want to feel guilty,
· we don’t want to be talked about,
· we want to avoid how it would feel if we say no.
I am a recovering people pleaser, and you can be too!
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In 2019, I chose the word curios as the emotion that I wanted to experience the most. I chose to focus on that word daily, look for evidence of my curiosity and really take note of the outcome in my life as a result of being curios.
It takes practice to be curious. About yourself and what is going on in your own brain.
It takes practice coming up with great questions to ask yourself from a place of curiosity vs confusion.
Confusion is easy to access. That where the brain likes to go. That’s where my brain like to go if it’s left unmanaged.
Confusion is familiar and easy to access but it’s exhausting. It doesn’t feel good to be confused and it keeps us from moving forward.
The whole point of confusion is to keep you in bed watching hulu eating oreos. Instead of chasing your dreams and creating the life of your heart’s desire.
Confusion has you reaching outside of yourself for answers and validation and evidence.
I came up with 5 powerful questions that I asked myself that helps me stay out of confusion and on the path of curiosity.
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What is your "go to" emotion? You know, the emotion that bubbles up when...
There is a real thing called emotional set point which is the medium or average of all of your daily emotions but it’s also the way that you generally experience life. Just regular routine day to day life.
We all have dominant emotions, responses to things in our lives that dominate how we show up in response to things, over and over again.
The question to ask yourself is..."does it work for you?" Is THAT how you WANT to show up in that scenario? Is it serving the result that you want to create?
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It would seem that they are just words so what’s the harm. That’s what I hope to answer for you today.
When you say that money doesn’t grow on trees, it sounds true because of course it doesn’t, but what it implies IS what makes this sentence harmful.
The implication is that money is hard
When we have a poor relationship with money, and we think that money is hard, it is difficult to see all of the opportunities available to us to create, invite or attract money.
Given the opportunity, we would all like to accumulate more money and live an abundant life.
It’s not just how we think that matters, it’s also how we speak, out loud, to others, how we think and talk about money.
The things that we think and how we speak about money IS what is creating our money result and has us living this money story.
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You can flip the script on your money story today!!!!
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When I say the word abundance, what do you think of? When I say the work lack or scarcity or insufficiency, what do you think of?
I want you to think of any area of your life in which you feel a place of lack.
It could be finances, or sleep but it could also be in the area of health and wellness, it could be in the area of relationships, or maybe even time. It could be in the area of a passion or hobby, maybe your career is feeling lack.
Thoughts and feelings of lack can show up anywhere.
When we think of abundance we tend to think of money or wealth and riches
But I have worked with people in order to up level their thoughts and create an abundance of health, wellness and heeling and also time.
We can up level any area of your life in which you feel lack.
Abundance is not only about the dollars in your bank account or the amount of stuff you have accumulated.
In fact, the opposite is true! Keep listening to see how you can incrementally up level your life starting TODAY!!!!
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I love working with people in the area of balance and abundance.
I received a great question last week…How do I know if I have a scarcity mindset or an abundant mindset? And, how do I create an abundant mindset exactly?
So we are going to dive right in.
So, where does scarcity, lack and feelings of insufficiency come from anyway…
We are going talk about where scarcity starts and the first two steps to creating a life of abundance.
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When it comes to people, and by people, I mean everyone one, not just difficult people, how we experience each other is through our thoughts about them.
Our relationship with everyone in our life is our thoughts about them.
Now, we might be influenced by things that they say and do, by their behavior, but, it’s still our thoughts about them that is our relationship with them.
And, if you have been listening for a while, you know that it is our thoughts that create our emotions and our emotions become fuel for how we show up in the worlds and that is what creates our results.
So, when you think someone is difficult, it’s generally because you don’t like something that they said or did or you don’t like the way they say or do things.
Sometimes it’s not even about the words as much as the tone and body language.
We are going to create a mind shift in working with difficult people. Click here for the companion workbook.
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What is imposter syndrome exactly?
It is the persistent inability to believe that one’s success is deserved or has been legitimately achieved as a result of one’s own efforts or skills.
That’s fancy talk for dream thief, joy thief and it’s the entre to self- sabotage and the unraveling of living the life of your heart’s desire.
Do you ever have that sense of waiting to be “found out” or that you don’t belong or that in good time, all of your inadequacies will be revealed and then everyone will know you aren’t as smart as they think you are, you aren’t as organized as you look or you really don’t have your life together…
Know what I mean?
Here’s what is crazy…the most seemingly confident person you know, also deals with imposter syndrome.
We all do but when we do, it feels like we are the only one. Right?
Doesn’t matter your age, your gender or line of work…if you are human and you have a brain, you feel like an imposter from time to time.
I can remember as early as first and second grade, feeling the imposter show up. It was all very confusing then and even as an adult, feeling like an imposter can cause all kinds of unnecessary pain.
We are going to clear all of that up today my friends.
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In this episode I am going to talk about the tragedy of self-doubt and give you 6 steps obliterate yours!
Humans have more than 50,000 thoughts a day. Not all of them are affecting us, most of them are helping get through our day on auto pilot.
It’s how we get through most of the day. We are able to get up, make the coffee, brush the teeth without a single conscious thought about any of it.
And then, there are those thoughts running in the background, the subconscious thoughts that we think that wreak havoc on our daily live and our goals, hopes and dreams, and we don’t even realize it.
The mind shift that I want to give you today is in terms of creating the exact outcome that you want by managing your thoughts and deciding the exact emotion that will fuel your actions so that you CAN create the outcome of your heart’s desire.
But first...let's talk about self-doubt and all of the little places it hides.
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There are no good emotions or bad emotions, good thoughts or bad thoughts.
There are only thoughts and emotions that serve you as you create the life of your heart’s desire or thoughts and emotions that do not serve you.
I used to think that because I had all of these negative thoughts and emotions that something was wrong with me.
I mean, I would see the evidence in the bookstores with aisles and aisles of books devoted to “How to Be Happy.”
So I thought, that must be the ultimate goal.
I read hundreds of them and none of them said what I am about to say to you…
We are supposed to have negative emotions! Yep!
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Hear what my 8 year old granddaughter has learned from the 10 Minute Mind Shift Podcast. She has some very wise words for any age...
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There was a time that I would pace until I saw his car turn into the drive way. There was a time that if he wanted to go do something with a friend, I made that mean he needed a break from me so he must be getting tired if me. There was a time that I made everything mean something about the state of our relationship and if he didn’t show up just perfect in my mind, it meant he didn’t love me. Today, in this season of our marriage when we travel together it’s a blast. When he goes skiing whether it’s alone or with his kids, I enjoy his joy in that. Being able to enjoy his friendship and show his friend a little bit of Florida brings me sooo much joy. It wasn’t always like that. I would worry and make it all mean something it wasn’t. So that’s a little insight to my before…before life coaching, before personal development. I get asked how did I learn what I know and who are some of my teachers and so today, I am going to share some of the words that changed my life. Today is game changing thoughts with Napoleon Hill from his book, Think and Grow Rich. It’s hard to imagine now, but there was a time in my life that I had such a scarcity mindset that the title o his book…”Think and Grow Rich” was a trigger for me. Now, it’s my go to book at least once a year. Here are some thoughts that change my game.
Click here to work on believing new things.
Christina Harmon and her incredible custom made jewelry.
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Whether we know it or not, we all have thoughts on how other people should show up in our lives, how they should act, how they should talk even what they should say, in order for us to NOT be triggered, frustrated, irritated…mad.
We have thoughts on how husbands and friends should be so that we feel loved, appreciated and respected. We even have thoughts on bosses and co-workers too.
Believing someone should be different than they are can feel like we’re looking out for them, just wanting them to be what we deem to be their best selves, but what you aren’t seeing is the pain you are inflicting on yourself in the process.
He should answer my email faster, she should be more professional, he should be more responsive, he should recognize my efforts, she shouldn’t be so loud and he is just plain unprofessional.
These kind of thoughts, are what I call a manual and these kind of thoughts are one of the most destructive thoughts we can bring into a relationship, any relationship.
Having a manual for someone is "Premeditated Resentment."
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When you think about where you are now and where you want to be in any area of your life whether it’s making more money or losing weight or living in the house of your dreams, have that degree, landing that dream job… it’s easy to start to feel like your goal is out of reach.
You may even have thoughts like, “people like me don’t make that kind of money, or people like me could never lose the weight or get that kind of job or have that kind of relationship.”
You name it, we all have that “things like that don’t happen to people like me” sentence in our head.
The larger the gap between where we are now and where we want to be, the more we begin to doubt and question whether it’s possible at all.
“Who am I to think I could ever…?”
“What made me think I could…?”
“I’ve never stuck with anything before, why did I think this would be different…?”
When the journey feels like it takes longer than expected, and we feel like we have too far to go, we end up feeling disappointed, we beat ourselves up for even having the idea of the goal, and if you are like me you jump right into the self-pity pool…
Why does this have to be so hard for me? Why can’t I be one of the lucky ones?
...and that my friends is what I call the gap trap! In this episode, I give you 6 steps designed to get you out of The Gap Trap.
Tired of committing to goals and then quitting? I have the best free virtual workshop EVER! "Break the Commit and Quit Cycle". It's free but you must register. Click here.
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Overwhelm, worry, anxiety, resentment, self-pity, self-doubt, confusion and indecision…these are all emotions that I would put into the “indulgent” emotion category.
Why?
We don’t need them, and they serve no purpose, and they are just in the way, and they slow things down when we are trying to create the life of our heart’s desire.
None of these emotions fuel inspired, positive, productive, creative massive action at all. In fact, for most of us, these emotions create inaction.
All of these emotions are useless and yet…for most of us…they are our dominant and go to emotion.
These emotions are very sneaky in that they seem to be important…like worry.
Worry disguises itself as concern or care. But I promise you, if it’s showing up as worry, it’s useless.
In this episode I teach you what to do when you find yourself in a state of an Indulgent Emotion.
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Who am I. We all ask ourselves that question occasionally. And when we try to answer it, we tend to look backwards to find the answer.
We tend to take look at our identity in this way when we are faced with unexpected changes to our life like losing or starting a job. The beginning or end of a relationship, having a child or losing a loved one.
But it also comes up when we are intentionally trying to create an outcome or accomplish a goal in which our future self will be significantly different.
For example…someone trying to find their soul mate, lose weight, get a promotion etc…your life will be different when you accomplish this results.
You will be different as a result of your journey to create those results.
Who we are, our identity is how we see ourselves, it is our thoughts about us.
How we see ourselves is what creates our results.
How do you think about you, what is the identity that you have created and committed to with your thoughts about you?
In this episode, I give you 4 easy steps to help you start living into YOUR potential today!
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In this episode, I share a personal story to illustrate 6 lessons in creating the outcome of your heart's desire. The brain will tell you there is a right decision and a wrong decision. The brain will tell you, if something sounds to good to be true, it probably is...lies...all lies!
These 6 lessons are things that Steve and I have learned and we apply them to our life to create our life by design. I want you to know how so that you can apply these lessons to your life, so that you can create the life of your heart's desire.
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A decision thought is the most powerful thought that ever was.
When we want to create an outcome like losing weight, making more money, or launching a business…it all starts with deciding first.
Making a decision is where we can find our power to create the lives we want to live, the experiences that we want to experience…it’s the first step toward stepping into our highest and best version of ourselves. It is how we create a life by design…we decide.
Sometimes, when we make a decision, we do it with the idea that we will know if we made the right decision by how hard it is to create the desired outcome.
We tend to think it was a good decision as long as things are going well, and things seem easy and then…when we have a bad day or things get hard, or feel like they are going south, we go right to the thought that we must have made a bad decision…again.
We think that if we made the right decision, the proof would be that things would be easy and sunshine and rainbows, daisy’s and unicorns and that’s just not true.
This is a two part episode all about Decision Thoughts!
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Your brain lies…on the daily. The part of your brain that lies is the primal part of the brain that has the sophistication of a 3 year-old.
In this episode, I am going share with you, the 6 lies your brain tells you, and what you can do differently to create better outcomes.
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In the last 2 episodes, we talked about creating more time by stopping the thoughts that we don’t have time and by deciding if what we are spending our time doing adds value to our life.
So in this episode we are going to answer this question… “How can I get more done?”
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After working with my coach I learned to decide how I wanted to spend my time and how I spend my time was going to be things that "I get to do" not things that "I have to do or need to do."
It's a subtle shift but it changes everything.
What do you want to do with your time? Decide where you don't want to waste your time on any longer?
What are the things that light you up and ignite you? What are things that you spend your time on that drain you. It's important to be aware of the things that suck your energy because it's easy for us to fall into the trap of thinking about these things in a way that creates resentment.
Resentment is draining.
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Click here to do the Free Time Management Virtual Workshop and get your Free Planner.
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This episode is the first of a 3-part series about creating more time.
I love teaching people how to create a life of balance and abundance.
Nowhere does the scarcity mindset show up more prevalent than when we talk about time…money too, but for sure time.
Our human brains are wired to think in terms of not having enough of a lot of things… food, money, love, respect, appreciation…and for sure time.
We wake up thinking we didn’t get enough sleep the night before.
Then our thoughts go to all the things that we need to get done today and we start feeling the lack of time creep into our being. It follows us around all day…
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The only reason you aren’t creating the life you want and the results you want is because of what you are THINKING.
It is 100% your impossibility thoughts that are keeping you from creating your results.
Learn the power of Possibility Thinking and how to create your own Possibility Thoughts.
Join the Free "Break the Commit and Quit Virtual Workshop"
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In this episode, I talk about tolerating and how tolerating makes us unavailable for things that serve us.
You get to decide!
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