i don't even own a television: Recent Episodes
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Hi, all. Probably this won’t come as a giant surprise, given our erratic schedule and limited output the past couple years, but the time has come to make it offical: We’re ending the show. There’s no beef, there’s no stress, but there is some sadness, and we recorded an episode to announce the end of the show and talk through it a bit.
The goal is to keep the archive available, but the Patreon will be shutting down by the end of April, 2023, so download anything from there that you want to hold on to. It’s been a lot of fun making this show for you all, and we encourage you all to ride the crab, keep reading crap, and try to make the world a little better any time you can.
https://traffic.libsyn.com/secure/ideotvpod/172_-_So_Long.mp3[download]Recommendations:
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Start your own fuckin’ band! Music:
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“No Regrets” by Dramarama
- “History Lesson, Part II” by the Minutemen
No, it’s not a new made-up term for a sexual position—as far as we know!—it’s the new Lucy Foley joint, The Paris Apartment! It’s darker than a wine cellar, twistier than an alley in your favorite arrondissement, but, unfortunately, about as eventful as an afternoon sighing with ennui over a couple of Gauloises and a well-nursed café au lait in a Left Bank café.
Pat your new Karen O. fringe into an appealing dishevelment, make your best face to express that you have the darkest of dark secrets and make sure you’ve got a skeleton key for all your neighbors’ places, because it’s time to take a trip into what some people are calling … la’part-a-ment Parisienne, but what we know to call The Paris Apartment.
https://traffic.libsyn.com/ideotvpod/The_Paris_Apartment.mp3[download]Recommendations:
- Paul Tremblay, The Pallbearer’s Club
- Jane Peck, The Verifiers
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Diane Duane, The Door into Fire plus The Worst Bestsellers Ep on it! Mood Music:
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“Heads Will Roll” by Yeah Yeah Yeahs
- “Bastille Day” by Rush
With tramps like these, hoo boy, do things get real and stay there in a hurry as your humble hosts pop their clutches and tell Mercedes Lackey and Larry Dixon’s Born to Run: A Novel of the SERRAted Edge to eat their dust! It’s another novel of the urban fantastique, with an Irish pub described […]
Well, friends, it’s surely time to put on your red shoes and dance the blues, this time along with us as we lace ’em up and see The Playmakers Series series of hockey romance novels, in this case Gauging the Player: A One-Night Stand Sorts Romance by G.K. Brady. Believe us, to see the […]
No know Jack? No, know Jack! Jack Reacher, that is, as we for some reason decide to experiment with CBS-grade Reacher-adjacency with Diane Capri’s series-starting Don’t Know Jack. This is a gaiden, in which the titular Jack is most present in his absence, as a wise-cracking pair of FBI Human Resources Detectives are looking to […]
We’re off the dang map here, folks, because we don’t know where we are, but we do know that here? there be monsters! Just in time for spooky season, we’re taking on one of the giants of the bad-book genre, Hannibal by Thomas Harris. This book is a big, corrosive bummer, with lots and […]
Homefolks, we came to party, and your eyes were looking at … Nöthin’ but a Good Time: The Uncensored History of the ’80s Hard Rock Explosion by Tom Beaujour and Richard Bienstock and it is well and truly time to push the opening acts off the stage and get ready for the *looks down at […]
It’s time to get what an old boss of Clsn’s used to call “choiceful” in these all-too-choice-free times, so we break format a little bit (and break out laughing a lot) with a “Which Way” book, in which we try and mostly fail to become the titular Champ of TV Wrestling. Do the elegant diversions […]
We live in a world that has hippos, and those hippos have to be ridden by people with weapons. Who’s gonna do it? You? These people have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. You weep for victims of hippos, and you curse the hippo riders. You have that luxury. You have the luxury […]
For SO many reasons, it’s time to get out of town, and so we’re hitting the road to check out some of those hot Atlanta Nights we’ve been hearing so much about! Atlanta Nights is a truly bizarre artifact, so strange that it forces us to break our own rules and stretch our own format, […]
EDITOR’S NOTE (JWF): Apologies for the audio quality, the late release, and the lack of a letters segment this time around, things got pretty out of sync and difficult and editing this episode became a real trial. So I salvaged what I could. It’s a tradition like no other, as our friend Stef Gray joins […]
Here on IDEOTV, it’s Christmas in … okay, August, but still it’s time for some wintry festivities as we read—and talk about!—Dachshund Through the Snow: An Andy Carpenter Mystery! It’s a murder mystery, a searing portrait of small-down power, corruption, and lies, a thrilling tale of corporate malfeasance, and a legal procedural, but really what […]
Lighters are clicking and flicking, wheels are rolling, and badasses are extremely American this time around as we climb into our checks notes LandMasters and take off across the blasted countryside of … Damnation Alley.
Tuff-guy posturing meets clouds of suspiciously sweetly scented smoke and maybe a few more descriptions of the sky than you were expecting, and the IDEOTV men have to have ANOTHER on-air strategy session to address WHY do all these books have damn’ PLAGUES in them, anyway.
We can’t exactly give this book a ringing endorsement, we’re not clappers in its audience, but we’re not on Team Pull ‘Er from the Shelves, either. If you’d like to know more about what we ding Damnation Alley on, press the button and maybe grab your bong!
https://traffic.libsyn.com/secure/ideotvpod/162_-_Damnation_Alley.mp3
[download]
Recommendations:
- Blue Light Yokohama by Nicolás Obregón
- “Letterheads” by Sarah Jeong
Music:
- “1,133 Rite of Spring Beats” by Various Artists
- “Undertaker Theme (12th) American Badass Uncensored Green Grass INtro” by Jesus, who CARES
Oh my goodness, this is gonna be a wild (broomstick) ride, as the all-time oldest friend of the show, Jeb “@mobute” Lund comes back to help us live deliciously and handle the weirdness of The Coven, by second-tier Watergate figure E. Howard Hunt, writing as “David St. John”. And, in a way, aren’t we all writing as David St. John?
We should note that this is a pulp novel of the early 70s, and, as such, blasts casual slurs, offensive stereotypes, and wide-spectrum ignorance and hostility onto basically every page: We work hard to skirt this garbage, but it’s there throughout. If you want to skip this ep, we’ll understand, and we certainly suggest you skip this book.
But if you’re in a mood for a two-fisted, many-piped Washington lawyer with some controversial opinions about young, handsome senators and, eventually, witchcraft, then fire up some incense, polish your cauldron and iron your hair, because you’ve just been granted access to … The Coven.
https://traffic.libsyn.com/secure/ideotvpod/161_-_The_Coven.mp3
[download]
Recommendations:
- L.A. Quartet by James Ellroy
- Perry Mason, remake by HBO
- L.A. Noir by John Buntin
- Jennifer’s Body movie
- The Hotel of the Three Roses by Augusto De Angelis
Music:
- “Witch Hunting Memoirs” by Mountain High
- “Witch Hunt” by Rush