Kevin Carmichael's Greenfingers: Recent Episodes
Kevin Carmichael
A seasonal podcast about cultivation... and life. Hosted by horticultural philosopher Kevin Carmichael. Blooming again after 7+ years!
Merry Christmas, it's the Autumn episode, just on time! Kevin invents a music genre, talks about his favourite album, and deals with multiple interruptions.
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Kevin discusses fortunes, music, and vampires.
A HUGE thanks to two special flowers, Aidan and Jake, for their help with the music!
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The long, harrowing wait is over! Springtime is here, and Kevin Carmichael is back to his old podcasting ways! Where has he been for 7 years? What are his springtime movie recommendations? What wisdom does he have to share with us about Garden Decorations? FIND OUT BY LISTENING TO THIS PODCAST!
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Our host gets cool.... (as ice), and spreads Christmas cheer like a rich fertilizer
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Our host looks through a potato's eyes, and reads a story about one man's fight against raccoons.
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I thought, in order to give my audience members more of an insight into what it really felt like to be among tulips and the people who love them, I would give you extensive photo coverage of the festival. Perhaps, for those of you unfortunate enough to have missed it, these images can be combined with the episode itself in order for you to create false memories of being there on which you can reminisce when you find yourself trapped in a mental cage of unfertile ground. Anyways! We should propel ourselves forward, as I am known for saying.
I was glad to see the creation of larger tulips for those with lesser vision; so they might get an understanding of the finer details of the flower. It is unfortunate that they felt the need to colour them inaccurately, after all, it takes much pretention to believe you can one-up our dear mother artistically.
It was wonderful to gain the opportunity to hide among the flowers in the manner of my smaller brethren.
Tulips... covered in tulips! It doesn't change my stance as a nature-purist, but I do feel I must give this one some credit for having some really fascinating philosophical implications.
Ah, the Netherlands. I appreciate what they've done to educate the masses - I know I certainly have learned to appreciate tulips more as a result of their work. But here it seems they are taking credit for nature's accomplishments. This is sketchy territory, Netherlands.
While I'm a little confused by its placement on land, I appreciate that they have warnings about the dangers of boating. Perhaps something that will drive the youth towards more wholesome, land-based activities, such as plant-growth? One can only hope.
I was very pleased to be given the opportunity to hold tulips in the manner they were intended.
And equally pleased by the surprise appearance of my dear friend, Ted Irwin! Glad to see someone so known for his ties with urban progress still finds time in his schedule for an event such as this. Good on you, Ted, good on you.
Ah yes, who doesn't enjoy a literary snack now and again?
Well, I hope you enjoyed this lithographic version of Greenfingers. All in all it was a very jolly day for myself, I learned a lot about what you can do with icing and buns.
I regret to inform you that there was short-sightedness in my seeing to the Petunias' desire for companionship last week. Whilst their spirits were lifted, it has come to my attention that I neglected to think about the consequences of giving them special treatment, and it seems that I've upset the rest of the garden. Just this morning, I could've sworn one of my tulips drooped in response to my presence - clearly a cry for attention, from a being that sadly lacked means for proper expression. I must devote myself to the garden for the next few days, using my banjo to gently caress each leaf - as well as the very soil itself - with sultry noises. I have Elisha to thank for reminding me of the important role passionate musical production can play in the relationship between a man and his garden.
But fear not, fellow Greenfingered individuals; a new episode will be posted on Tuesday.
Until then,
Godspeed,
Kev.
Our host graciously tolerates a guest and talks about the significance of potatoes.
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I would like to start this entry by apologizing to my viewership, for I am dreadfully sorry to have to admit that as a result of unforeseen circumstances, this Saturday will be devoid of a new episode of Kevin Carmichael's Greenfingers. I understand that that's the day that people expect it, but instead it will be released on a Monday, despite the fact that I'm aware that that isn't the same as Saturday at all. In the interest of full disclosure and getting the sympathies of those who will experience disappointment at the prospect of having to wait the extra couple days for my words, I will explain to you the events leading to this delay.
As I woke up this morning and began my early gardening ceremonies, the Petunias caught my eye. While the Petunias rarely fail to catch my eye, this was an instance when it was out of something other than a desire for pleasurable distraction. As someone with a deep feel for plants, it only took me a few seconds and a whiff of the air to notice something insidious was afoot. Further investigation confirmed my suspicions, it seems my Petunias have recently entered a stage of clinical depression. As plant-owners yourselves, I'm sure you can understand my need to prioritize this, and I don't need to tell you the level of distress one goes through when a flower has lost its exuberance, much less when the number exceeds one. I'm going to sleepover in the garden for a few nights to try to take their minds off things. Maybe get them some special fertilizer or another form of excitement; in fact, perhaps I will set up a television and we shall marathon Magnum P.I.! I'm certainly no stranger to the healing powers of basking in the warm light of television, especially when accented by the soothing tones of Tom Selleck's moustache.
So, until Monday.
Godspeed,
Kevin Bartholomew Carmichael
Our host speaks of those wonderful six-legged scamps, and gardens with himself.
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Our host conducts a re-evaluation of raccoons, debates the merits of seeds with himself and speaks to an expert.
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