Birth Mother Matters in Adoption: Recent Episodes

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption

AZ Pregnancy Help is dedicated to assisting birth mothers in their adoption journey through Building Arizona Families Adoption Agency. Adoption matters!

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 3, Episode 223; "Not Alone" Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Both men and eomen can be victims of domestic violence. The U.S. Office on Violence Against Women defines domestic violence as "a pattern of abusive behavior in any relationship that is used by one partner to gain or maintain power and control over another intimate partner. Domestic violence can be physical, sexual, emotional, economic, psychological, or technological actions or threats of actions or other patterns of coercive behavior that influence another person within an intimate partner relationship. This includes any behaviors that intimidate, manipulate, humiliate, isolate, frighten, terrorize, coerce, threaten, blame, hurt, injure, or wound someone."Domestic Violence Hotline- 1-800-799-7233. (If you are located in Arizona, you can also call 602-542-0435.)

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 3, Ep 222; Birth Mother Common Concerns Facing an unplanned pregnancy can elicit a myriad of emotions. Adoption is a beautiful choice but you may have some concerns about the process. Listen and learn all about these concerns and how we can help.Remember that its normal to have concerns about any decision you are making, especially if you are new to the idea of something. An adoption agency, like Building Arizona Families understands that you have concerns and we are here to help you address and remedy your conerns. Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 3, Ep 221; Adoption News and Updates

News Matters-

On June 15, 2023, the Supreme Court upheld the circuit court's conclusion that Congress' power to legislate Indian affairs is well-established and broad; therefore, the ICWA “is consistent with Congress' power under Article I of the Constitution.”

Update Matters-

Learn about the latest adoption trends and what has changed.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 3, Episode 220; Growing Up AdoptedListen to Co-Host Kelly Rourke-Scarry as she discusses what it was like to grow up as an adoptee in the 1970s and 1980s. Learn about the differences between then and now, how these changes are for the better and why it was so important for the changes to occur. Learn more about adoption from the "Adoptee Angle" of the Adoption Triad. Spread Adoption Awareness.Listen. Learn. Love. Adoption.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 3-219 Substance Use During PregnancySome pregnant women use drugs during their pregnancy. Drug exposure prenatally in adoption situations may cause concern and anxiety for hopeful adoptive parents. Learning more will help us understand and be able to make well-informed decisions.Every year, at least once on this podcast we like to look at the current research and dicuss any changes we have seen over the past year. We are not a medical facility, nor are we medical professionals, so this podcast is to discuss the available research and what we have seen as professionals in the adoption world.Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 3, Episode 218; A Difficult First Step Building Arizona Families and AZ Pregnancy Help is an Adoption Agency in Arizona. We are an adoption center where we help build families. When pregnat women contact us and want to make an adoption plan, we understand that the first meeting can be a very emotional step. Since we are a private adoption agency, we go the extra mile to make our new clients feel as supported as possible.Our adoption office is located in Phoenix, Arizona. We are located off of a major highway and we take pride that in our office we have a non-perishable food pantry and a maternity clothing closet. Our goal is to be a resource for women making an adoption plan. Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 3, Episode 217; Facts About AdoptionJoin us as we explore facts about adoption you may not know! Learn more about adoption.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 3, Ep 215; Adult Adoptions with Logan Scarry

In honor of National Adoption Month, today we will hear from our Co-Host, Kelly Rourke-Scarry as she and her adopted son, Logan Scarry discuss adult adoption. Kelly adopted Logan at 19 years old, this year. Logan discusses what it means to be adopted as an adult and why being adopted was important to him. Kelly also discusses the importance of adult adoption and why its done.

Note: the state laws surrounding adult adoption differ from state to state.

Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 3, Ep 216; 7 Adoption Issues

In 1982 there was an article “Seven Core Issues inAdoption” by Sharon Kaplan Roszia and Deborah Silverstein in which 7 issues were brought to light.

Listen and learn about 7 potenital issues that may arise in an adoption situtation. These 7 issues are not exclusive to adoption but can also be present in adoption. Learn how to watch for possible signs and how to address them. Adoption is a beautiful choice.

Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 3, Episode 214; National Adoption Awareness Month 2022

National Adoption Month is an initiative of the Children's Bureau. The National Adoption Awareness Month brings awareness to those lives who have been impacted by adoption and who assist in the facilitation of the adoption process. Throughout the month of November, the goal is to spread awareness and encourage society to learn about adoption. Throughout National Adoption Month, we celebrate all members of the adoption triad, including the families who have grown through adoption, additionally, we recognize the journey of the many children who are waiting for their forever families.

Make this National Adoption Month extra special and help us spread Adoption Awareness!

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 3, Episode 213: The Benefits & Challenges of Open Adoption

Listen & Learn about the benefits and challenges of open adoption. Open adoption can be defined within parameters of open lines or line of communication. Learn about how the past has shaped the current state of adoptions and why open adoption can be such a blessing.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption S3, Ep 212; Adoption Does Not Make You Pregnant

There is a myth that if you want to become pregnant begin the adoption process.

Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption S3, Ep 212; Adoption Does Not Make You Pregnant

There is a myth that if you want to become pregnant begin the adoption process.

Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption S3, Ep 211; When Your Heart Tells You Its Time

Learn about when the time is right to begin the adoption reunification process, what it looks like and how to begin. Listen and Learn all about adoption reunification.

Birth Mother Matters Adoption Season 3, Ep210; The Wait is Over, We're Back With Updates

We are back and excited to get back to all things "adoption."

Join us as we discuss the lates happenings in the adoption world- so many new things to talk about! We will be dicussing topics such as the latest happenings in adoption, Safe Haven, abortion and so much more!!!

Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 3, Ep209: Roe v. Wade Overturned

The U.S. Supreme Court on 6/24/2022 overturned its landmark decision Roe v. Wade that had previously secured the federal right to obtain an abortion. The Supreme Court overturns Roe v. Wade and leaves the practice of abortion in the states' hands. "The Constitution does not confer a right to abortion; Roe and Casey are overruled; and the authority to regulate abortion is returned to the people and their elected representatives,” read the majority opinion.

The U.S. Supreme Court ruled 6/24/2022, in Dobbs v. Jackson Women’s Health Organization, that the Constitution does not guarantee a right to abortion. Under Roe and the court’s 1992 ruling in Planned Parenthood v. Casey, states had not been allowed to enact bans on most abortions until after a pregnancy had reached the threshold of fetal viability, when it is believed that an unborn child could survive outside the womb.

The states that are predicted to impose an abortion ban are Alabama, Arkansas, Idaho, Kentucky, Louisiana, Mississippi, Missouri, North Dakota, Oklahoma, South Dakota, Tennessee, Texas, Utah, West Virginia and Wyoming. Three other states — Georgia, Ohio and South Carolina — are likely to ban abortions after the sixth week of pregnancy. Two other states — Arizona and Florida — have passed 15-week bans this year.

Will this impact adoption? What will happen next?

Listen, Learn, Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 3-208 The Supreme Court Leak

The leak of a draft U.S. Supreme Court decision that would strike down Roe v. Wade signals the Court is poised to reverse the landmark 1973 case that guaranteed the constitutional right to abortion. Learn how this landmark case may affect adoptions.

Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matter Adoption Podcast S3, Ep207: First Conversation With a Birth Mother

Learn about the first phone call with a birth mother. Learn about what to talk about and how to prepare.

Adoption Matters.

Live. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast Season 3, Episode 206: Combatting the Adoption Naysayers

Learn about the importance of adoption awareness and how important it is to have knowledge and education to promote truth. All members of society and your social ciricle may share the same beliefs you have about adoption. Its not important for everyone to agree with your belief system or perspective, however it is important that those around you are educated in adoption and understand facts and truth. Adoption awareness is one of the most important ways you can promote the importance, normalization of and the prevalance of adoption.

Birth Mother Matters Adoption Podcast S3, Ep205: A Very Special Family

Jen, Joe, Tina and Samson join us for this episode of Birth Mother Matters in Adoption to discuss their open adoption. Listen to how they have developed a an open adoption relationship with one another that transcends the "normal" open adoption- listen to why they chose this relationship, how they achieved it and how they plan on continuing to maintain it. We can all learn from families who explore the boundaries of open adoption and succeed!

Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters Adoption Podcast S3, Ep204: Abortion Law Updates In the U.S.

2021 has been a year full of change, especially in the Abortion World. Across the United States, many individual states have amended their laws and many are in the process of continuing to amend them. The wait for the Supreme Court ruling on what could lead to overturning Roe V. Wade hangs in the balance. This podcast will get you up tp speed on what happened to many abortion laws during 2021.

Birth Mother Matters Adoption Podcast S3, Ep203: Abortion Laws Around the World

2021 has been a year of many changes in the abortion world. Today we explore the differences in abortion laws across the world and and how they may or may not impact the laws here in the United States. Listen to the vast differences between country, how some countries' abortion laws may surprise you and the numerous changes made this past year. Abortion and adoption are two different choices for unplanned pregnancies and educations brings awareness and awareness brings change.

Birth Mother Matters In Adoption Podcast S3, Ep202: A Christmas Message

From our families to yours, Merry Christmas.

Birth Mother Matters In Adoption Podcast S3, Ep201: Being Thankful in All Things

Reunification in adoption doesn't always work out the way we think. Finding ways to be thankful. Learn about adoption reunifcation when it doesn't work out the way we think it will.

Birth Mother Matters Podcast S2, Ep200: November is National Adoption Month

November is National Adoption Month! Learn how you can suport all members of the adoption triad. Also, learn how and why the holidays may be difficult for and how you can help! Keep on learning about all things adoption!

Birth Mother Matters Podcast S2, Ep 199: People's Fascination With Adoption

Learn about the reasons society is fascinated with adoption, what the most commonly asked questions are and why it is an issue.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast Season 2, Episode 198: 20 Reasons Why Women Choose Adoption

There are a multitude of reasons that birth mothers choose adoption. Here are twenty of the reasons... Too young- teen momNot ready to be a parentIn financial distressDesire for baby to have the best life possibleStruggling with addictionPregnancy is a result of rape or incestNo support – single parent maybe, no family?Life is presently unstable: unemployed/homelessWanting different things out of life: College, Demanding Job etc…Family is not in agreement with you parenting a babyBroken up with the birth fatherCPS/DCS- state involvement with other childrenDon't believe in abortion- religiousSignificant/severe health issuesCurrently in a Domestic Violent situationDon't have the time/resources/patience for another childDesire for your child raised in a two parent familyThe baby will have special needs and you are unable to care for your babyAdoption is free for BMs and they may be able to receive assistanceThe belief in adoption, maybe experienced adoption before These 20 reason for women choosing to make an adoption plan are only some of the reasons women choose adoption.

Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast S2, Episode 197: The Adoption Influence

What influences society's view of adoption and how does that influence adoptive families?

Adoption isn’t taboo, and we need to celebrate it, just like you would the news of a pregnancy. Share in the joy! Maybe plan a “Sip & See” after the adoption is finalized?

Remember when somone is sharing their exciting news of choosing to adopt: Be mindful of thestories you tell…Hold off on a summerization of "Lifetime-type" movies.Its not the time to tell the stories of adoption disruptions of others. (Additionally, you may not have the whole story.)Remember that your words matter. Use adoption- friendly word chpices and be mindful of what you say and the way in which you say it.Keep in mind that additionally, your or others' reposnses may be influenced by various types of Influences, such asSocial MediaEducation LevelPersonal ExperienceGenerational InfluenceSocial Influence If you offer your congratulations and support, that will mean the world to the person(s) adopting. If you have questions, maybe hold off for a bit until the news is shared with everyone intended. Adoption support is needed, and the importance and value of adoption matters.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption 2:196: Spreading the Love of Adoption

Spreading the Love of Adoption, raising adoption awareness- what you can do to make an impact on elevating the understanding, acceptance and choice of adoption.

Giving adoption a voice.

Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast 2:195: Following Up on Topics

Follow-up on previous topics previously discussed: online adoptive profiles, Fund raising, abortion news, separation anxiety, holiday giving.

Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast 2:194 Separation & Anxiety For Adoptees

Sparation Anxiety can be a common issue among adoptees. Adoptees may experience separation & anxiety during their lifetime. Adoptees may find comfort in knowing that they are not alone, goodbyes can be very difficult. Loved ones can gather an understanding adoptee separation anxiety and ways to support them.

Listen. Learn. Love.

Giving adoption a voice.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2; Episode 193: Against Medical Advice

Sometimes in an adoption situation, Birth Mothers do not stay for the medically advised duration after they deliver their baby. Listen and learn why this happens. Adoptive families need to learn and prepare for what may/may not happen when its time for Labor and Delivery!

Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Ep 2-192: Birth Mothers Show Their Strength

Listen to Birth Mothers as their share their adoption stories. Listen as they talk about what their experience was really like. Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast Ep 2-110: Everything Is Bigger in Texas, Even their Hearts

Gather the latest abortion news on what is happening in Texas. Texas is leading the country in the implementation of their new abortion laws. Listen now.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 2-190 Gaining a New Perspective on Adoption and Abortion (With Kelly's Brother Michael)

Listen to the perspective of a biological sibling view's on abortion; listen to how the perspective can change when education and experience come into play.

Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode Season 2-189 Adoption from a Biological Sibling's Perspective

Michael, Co-Host Kelly Rourke-Scarry's biological brother joins our podcast today to discuss adoption, his perspective and what it looks and feels like from a sibling perspective. Michael is the youngest biological brother of Kelly Rourke-Scarry additionally discusses his view of adoption and adoption reunification.

Join us as we dive into an aspect of adoption rarely discussed and an area of little research.

Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast Season 2;188: Coming in From the Outside

Our guest on today's podcast is Building Arizona Families' Receptionist: Maura. She began working for Building Arizona Families and the Donna K. Evans Foundation two years ago. In the past two years, Maura has learned a lot about adoption, after coming to us with no real connection or tie to adoption. Maura has been able to be not only a friendly face, a warm smile to birth mothers coming into the office, but a caring and supportive listener. Listen to what a "newcomer" has learned and her perspective on adoption.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast Season 2;187: Adoption Misconceptions

Listen & Learn about common misconceptions regarding making an adoption plan, birth fathers and living expenses. Learn about the factors, reasoning and legal implications of adoption misconceptions. Be part of the solution in educating society about adoption misconceptions.

Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast Season 2;186: ICPC with Lisa Simpson

The Interstate Compact on the Placement of Children (ICPC) explained by our guest, Attorney Lisa Simpson. Learn all about what happens in the adoption process when adopting out of state. Learn about why ICPC exisits, how it protects children and families and what you need to understand. When learnign all about adoption, this is a vitial component to adoption.

Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast, Season 2, Episode 185: Lexi- She Chose Adoption To Break the Cycle

Lexi is a young lady who chose adoption for her newborn son to provide him with the life she wanted him to have and break the generation life cycles. Listen to our courageous guest discuss her adoption experience and explain why adoption was such an important choice for her to make. Adoption was a way to make sure her son had the opportunites, experiences and resources she wanted him to have. Placing her son was in no way easy, but right for her and him, in every way.

Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Ep 2-184: Coming From Guatemala;David's Adoption Journey, Part 2 of 2

We are so excited to bring you Part 2 of 2, David was adopted from the Country of Guatemala. Listen to his adoption story and his perspective on adoption. David, our guest talks about his life; growing up adopted. His insight and his story bring a strong feeling of belonging, appreciation and love.

Listen. Learn. Love

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Ep 2-183: Coming From Guatemala;David's Adoption Journey

Today on our podcast, our guest was adopted from the Country of Guatemala. Listen to his adoption story and his perspective on adoption. David, our guest talks about his life; growing up adopted. His insight and his story bring a strong feeling of belonging, appreciation and love.

Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters Adopt. Ep 2-182: The McConnell's; An Amazing Adoption Story

Listen with us to the heartwarming and ever so inspriring story of the McConnells' adoption that we stumblked across on the web. Learn why we think stories like this matter so much and how they can impact the way we view adoption, our own viewpoionts and more!

Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, Episode 181: Adoption Profiles in Social Media

An adoption family profile is a book that the adoptive family creates for the birth parents so that they can get to see who you are, what you are all about and what kind of a family that you are. A traditional family profile book may include: a letter to the birth mother/father photos and details about your: family immediate familyextended familyhomelikes/dislikeshobbiespetsand more When creating an online adoptive family profile, it is much less information and usually a very condensed version. Learn about the pros and cons and upsides and downsides of a online platform.

Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Ep 2-180: Updates on Birthmother Scams

Domestic, newborn adoptions are very popular amongst adoption choices. One of the main concerns when beginning an adoption journey, as an adoptive family- is the possibility of being scammed by a birth mother. Scamming is the "black eye" of adoption.

Learn about the latest birth mother scams throughout the adoption community. Listen to the pattern of adoption scams. Love the knowledge- educate the adoption community and the public.

Adoption matters- stay in the know.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, Episode 179- Will Someone Want to Adopt My Baby If...

When adoptive families come into our program, they fill out a preference sheet, very similar to a preference sheet that you, as a birth mother will fill out. In the adoptive families’ preference sheet they will select if they will accept substance exposure and which substances, along with a range of questions. The reason for a preference sheet is so we make sure an adoptive family is placed with a baby that they can handle should any issues arise

If you are pregnant, regardless of the situation- we can help. There are adoptive families that are wanting and willing to adopt your baby. Your baby can have the life you want him or her to have.

So, if you are pregnant and are considering adoption, we are a licensed, full-service, non-profit Arizona Adoption Agency. We believe in adoption aftercare services and have a program on site to provide continued support through the Donna K. Evans Foundation. You can contact us 24/7 at (623) 695-4112.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 2-178 Adoptive Families' Expectations

Where to start- when you are an adoptive family setting expectations for your adoption journey is important. Learn what realistic expectations are when beginning an adoption journey. Learn where to gather information and which resources will help guide you to the most imperative knowledge. Listen. Learn. Love.

Birthmother Matters Adoption in Season 2 Episode #177: What is a TPR w/ Attorney Lisa Simpson

Attorney Lisa Simpson Joins our podcast for this episode, explaining TPR is the abbreviation of “termination of parental rights.” This is one of the steps in the adoption process and This termination occurs when a parent has chosen to place their baby for adoption. Learn more about this adpoption process from a very seasoned adoption attorney! Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters Adoption Season 2 Ep.176: Summer's Here

Its sumemrtime here in Arizona and that means the temperature is very hot. Pregnant women that are homeless are at a higher risk of danger due to the heat than many other indivudals. Additionally, learn how Father's Day, Mother's Day and the Back to School Season may impact a family that is beginning the adoption process or considering adoption.

Birth Mother Matters Adoption Season 2 Ep.175: A Look At The Home Study Process

Angie Penrose joins us on todays podcast to discuss the latest updates and time frames on Adoption Home Studies in Arizona. Listen to Angie as she gives the nuts and bolts of Arizona Adoption Home Studies and the impact of Covid-19 on the process and learn what you can do when beginning your adoption journey.

Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2 Ep.174: Family Choices

Adoptive families will encounter the adoption step pf developing their adoption family preferences. Adoptive families need to look at what the best match for their family will be. Additionally, adoptive families need to understand what factors; internal and external may factor into their decsion. Adoption family preferences are a huge factor in the path their adoption journey will take. Listen to how surrounding factors may influence the adoption journey and ways to open adoption preferences.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2 Ep.173: An Introduction to BAF Class

Listen to Becky Merryman discuss the new online class offered for families intersted in learning more about Building Arizona Families's Newborn Adoption Program. This is a free class offered monthly for families wanting to expand their family through newborn adoption,

Birth Mother Matters In Adoption Podcast Season 2 Episode#172: Drugs; Getting Birth Mothers Through The Waiting Room

Listen and learn about substance abuse and why its a problem for birth mothers. This drug epidemic has impacted adoptions throughout the United States. Listen to one perspective how empathy, understanding and services can positively impact the substance abuse rate. Acknowleding and understanding the substance abuse crisis is the first step in finding a solution. We, as a society need to get individuals struggeling with drug abuse through "the waiting room."

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2 Ep.171: What Ron Has Learned So Far

Take a look back at what one cohost has learned after 171 episodes about adoption. Revisit important topics, changed viewpoints and increased awareness. Its all about adoption matters.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2 Ep.170: Be Prepared for Your Intake

Learn what happens during the adoption intake process for women who are pregnant and making the beauticul choice of adoption. Listen to one of Building Arizona Familes' adoption intake workers as she describes the intake process so adoptive families and women considering adoption can understand and learn what to expect.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2 Ep.169: The Value of Open Adoptions

Listen and learn about the value of open adoptions for all members of the adoption triad. Listen to why an open adoption can positively impact every memebr of the adoption triad, how it can also positively impact the understanding of society's understanding of adoption.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2 Episode #168: Growing Up Adopted

Learn how to set the groundwork for an open adoption relatipnship for all sides of the adoption triad. Learn about the step you can take as any triad member to improve the changes of having the open relation ship you desire. Adoption education is the key to success.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption S2 Ep.167:A National Birth Mother's Day Message

National Birth Mother’s Day occurs on the Saturday before Mother’s Day (second Sunday of May) and this year it is May 8, 2021. It’s a day to honor all birth mothers who chose to place their babies for adoption.

National Birth Mother’s Day was first founded and celebrated in Seattle, Washington, in 1990, by Mary Jean Wolch-Marsh and a group of other women who placed their baby for adoption.

To all of the birth mothers out there, we honor you!

Happy National Birth Mother's Day!

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2 Episode #166: The Attendance of Prenatal Visits

Gain an education about birth mothers and their reluctance to attend prenatal visits. Understand why it is important for adoptive families for birth mothers to attend these medical appointments. Learn how a poor attendance record of prenatal visits impacts a adoptive family, but gather an understanding as to why it can be difficult for a birth mother to attend.

Listen, Learn, Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2 Episode #165: All Children Are Valued & Wanted

On April 27th 2021, Govenor Doug Ducey signed a contentious bill making it a crime to perform abortions based on genetic conditions, despite OB-GYNs and attorneys warning it was "medically unsound" and unconstitutional.

Medical providers who terminate pregnancies based solely on conditions like Down syndrome or cystic fibrosis could face prison time under Senate Bill 1457, unless the abortion involves a condition that is considered "lethal." The measure also confers civil rights on fetuses at any stage of development, with an exception for embryos created via in vitro fertilization.

Listen to how this may positively impact adoptions and how many adoptive families want to adopt babies and children, including those with special needs.

Adoption. Listen, Learn, Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, Episode 164: Back in the Saddle Again

Jumping back into Case Management can teach valuable lessons in adoption, create opportunities for improvement and keep management fresh and current in the world of birth mothers. Going back to "front line" adoption work can only improve an already existing amazing adoption program, and in addition to staying in the "know" enable the opportunity for a closer relatiosnhip with the agency's clients.

Birth Mother Matters Adoption Season 2,Episode #163: You Got Served; A Conversation With A Process Server

Listen to Dana, a Process Server with 30 years experience. In Arizona, when a potential birth father is named by a birth mother is named, that birth father is provided with notice of the adoption. In some situations, a process server is used to provide notice. Listen to one aspect of the adoption process.

Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters Adoption Season 2, Episode 162: Mother's Day & Birth Mother's Day Saturday, May 8th 2021 - National Birth Mother's Day (always celebrated the Saturday before Mother's Day.)Sunday, May 9th 2021 - Mother's Day Birth Mother's Day is always celebrated the day before Mother's Day. These days are important to celebrate, especially for those in the adoption community or part of the adoption triad. Learn more about why they are important, why you need to celebrate them and some ideas of how to make them extra special. Get a head start on planning on make 2021, the best celebration ever.

Birth Mother Matters Adoption Season 2,Episode#161: Adoption Case Managers

Learn about adoption case managers, what is important in their skill set, what is required and why. Learn more about the reasons behind the type of case manager adoption agency's need. Find out more about what type of social worker/case manager is needed by adoption agencies, what types of personalities are the best fit, and why. This podcast is the opinion of one agency director, other agencies may have different opinions.

Birth Mother Matters Adoption Season 2,Episode 160: The Legal Aspect of Adoption

Listen and learn all about the legal aspect of adoption. Attorney Lisa Simpson is our guest on today's podcast. Listen to an attorney with decades of adoption law experience.

Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters Adoption Season 2, Episode 159: For Birth Mothers Only

Anyone can and everyone should listen to this episode; learn, grown and understand why adoption is a beautiful choice.

Choosing adoption means choosing an option with support, aftercare and access to financial resources. Adoption is a beautiful choice and one that is increasingly becoming a more popular choice. in order for others to believe in and support you in your adoption choice, you need to believe in it first. You are the champion of your cause. Owning your adoption choice comes with the belief and knowledge that you have made the right decision. If you are pregnant and are considering adoption, we are a licensed, full-service, non-profit Arizona Adoption Agency. We believe in adoption aftercare services and have a program on site to provide continued support through the Donna K. Evans Foundation. You can contact us 24/7 at (623) 695-4112. You are not alone and we want to help, thank you for considering adoption, you are making an amazing choice.

Birth Mother Matters Adoption Season 2,Episode 158: Fentanyl in the Adoption World

According to the CDC Website- "Pharmaceutical fentanyl is a synthetic opioid, approved for treating severe pain, typically advanced cancer pain. It is 50 to 100 times more potent than morphine. It is prescribed in the form of transdermal patches or lozenges and can be diverted for misuse and abuse in the United States.

However, most recent cases of fentanyl-related harm, overdose, and death in the U.S. are linked to illegally made fentanyl. It is sold through illegal drug markets for its heroin-like effect. It is often mixed with heroin and/or cocaine as a combination product—with or without the user’s knowledge—to increase its euphoric effects"

For Adoptive Parents, when you have or had a birth mother that is or has used Fentanyl, be educated, and learn all you can.

For Birth Mothers, by choosing adoption, you can choose the asoptive family for your baby. Your baby does not have to go into foster care, or be a ward of the state. Choosing adoption, means choosing the life for your baby that you want your baby have and your baby deserves. Choosing an open adoption means you can remain in your child's life.

Adoption is a beautiful choice.

Birth Mother Matters Adoption S2,Ep.157: A Day of Tears

In Alamaba, a resolution was passed that calls for private citizens in Alabama to lower their flags on January 22nd. Day of Tears will be a day of national mourning. A goal is to encourage people across the country to fly their flags at half-staff on January 22nd.

Day of Tears is a 501(c)(3) committed to the lives of the preborn. The organization's goal is to have flags lowered across the nation on January 22, in remembrance, honor, and mourning for the over 61 million lives that have been lost to abortion.

Alabama has long been a leader in passing laws providing protections for the unborn. Legislation has included the Pain-Capable Unborn Child Protection Act, Unborn Child Protection from Dismemberment Abortion Act, and the Human Life Protection Act.

Birth Mother Matters Adoption S2,Ep.156: Planned Parenthood & COVID Relief Funds

Twenty-five US Senators are requesting an investigation into the possibility that Planned Parenthood ‘illegally’ took $83 million in coronavirus stimulus. Stay informed and educated on what happens in our country surrounding adoption. Understand how abortion funding can have a negative effect on the number of adoptions that occur.

This is not a polical podcast, and the purpose is to inform those intersted in all aspects of adoption.

Birth Mother Matters In Adoption Season 2,Episode.155: Where Have All The Birth Mothers Gone?

Are there less pregnant women choosing to place their babies for adoption? What has changed for women considering adoption? What are some contributing factors in the reasons women choose adoption when pregnant? What might the future hold for adoptions?

Listen and get a perspective and opinion on the fluctuations on numbers of pregnant women choosing adoption. Gain insight, understand their thought process and be educated.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast Season 2, Episode 154: Adoption Match Phone Calls

When choosing an adoptive family, sometimes it takes more than looking through adoption profiles. A telephone call with the adoption agency between the birth mother and the adoptive family can produce tremendous results.

Pictures and words can only go so far, sometimes we need more to make a decison, espcially one that involves the choice of an adoptive family. A little phone call can go a long way.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, Episode #153: The Power of Donations

Building Arizona Families, AZ Pregnancy Help, and The Donna K. Evans Foundation need your donations. Listen to this podcast and understand why your donations are needed, what is done with them and what they accomplish. Listen to what a difference you can make through the power of donating.

No gift is too big or too small. If you would like to donate with a gift or money, 100% of your generous donation benefits the birth mothers and their futures.

We thank you for your consideration of these strong, selfless women – whose tremendous sacrifice and courage to make an adoption plan for their child deserves our ongoing encouragement and support so she can gain her wings and fly toward her dreams.

Building Arizona Families / AZ pregnancy Help - 8433 North Black Canyon Highway, Building 6, Suite 152 Phoenix, Arizona 85021

The DKE Foundation- 8433 N. Black Canyon Highway Building 6, Suite 158 Phoenix, AZ 85021

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, Episode #152: Adjustment of Expectations

When embarking on an adoption journey, it is important to begin with accurate and current information about the adoption process. It is also important to be flexible in thinking, expect changes and have the ability to adjust your expectations.

Some Expectations that some Adoptive Families may have: Birth Mothers will attend every OBGYN appointmentsBirth Mothers will want constant communicationBirth Mothers will be forthright and candid about every aspect of their lviesBirth Mothers will disclose any and all drug useAn adoption agency can control a birth mother An adoption agency has a crystal ballThe Adoption Entity can control the adoption outcome The abiltiy to adjust expectations and understand the importance of the concept of mindfullness will help create a happier, more fulfilling and joyful adoption experience.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast Season 2 Episode #151: Updates on COVID-19 & Adoption

Today's podcast focuses on COVID-19 updates in Arizona and their impact on adoption.

Listen. Learn. Love.

Adoption Matters!

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2 Episode #150: International Adoption- Scott's Story

Last week, we had Angie as a guest on our podcast discusing her experience with her international adoption. Today we have Scott, her husband and we hear from a father's perspective. Scott discusses his thoughts, feelings and memories of his adoption journey. Scott and Angie adopted an older sibling group of three children from Russia.

Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, Episode 149: A Birth Mother's Journey- Tina's Story

Tina, an amazing birth mother chose adoption for her babies. She has open adoption with both adoptive families of her babies and feels very positive about her adoption choices. TIna discusses the reasons she choose adoption and why she felt then and feels now that she made the very best choice for her children. Listen. Learn. Love.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast Season 2 Episode148: International Adoption- Angie's Story

Angie and her husband adopted three children from Russia. The children were a sibling group of three; ages 7,9 and 10 when they were adopted. Listen to her story.

Learn about one mother's story about how she adopted her three children from Russia. Understanding older child adoption, alongside sibling adoption, and with chidlren who spek another language. This podcast teaches us so much about interntaional adoptions.

Don't miss it!

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption S2 Ep. 147: Birth Mothers and a Birth Father

AZ Pregnancy Help is dedicated to assisting birth mothers in their adoption journey through Building Arizona Families Adoption Agency. Adoption matters!

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption S2, Ep. 146 Abortion Updates & Adoption Impact

So many states are introducing new bills regarding abortion. These bills are geared to restrict abortion and save lives. Listen and learn about what is happening around you, the less abortions had, the more possibilities for adoptions to occur!

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption, S2, Ep145: Adoption VS DCS

Listen to a former Department of Child Safety worker to understand what happens when a birth mother has an adoption plan and DCS (Department of Child Safety), formally known as CPS (Child Protective Services) arrives at the hospital and tells the birth mother that the state is going to take custody if the birth mother does not complete her adoption plan and place her baby for adoption. This is her opinion, her viewpoint and gives her stance.

Disclaimer: The views, information, or opinions expressed during this podcast are solely those of the individuals involved. Additionally, We have made every reasonable effort to present accurate information on our podcast, however, we are not liable for any inaccurate information as this information was obtained by a sole individual.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption, S2, Ep. 144 : What I Wish I Had Known...

Take a look back with us as we walk down the road of 16 years of working in the adoption community. Listen to the lessons we have been taught and how we have grown as adoption social workers. Learn more about understanding birth parents and adoptive families.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption (BMMIA) Podcast S2, Ep. 143: Reunification From the Adoptive Family's Perspective

Our co-host, Kelly's Rourke-Scarry's adoptive parents open up about their thoughts, feelings and experiences when she reunited with her birth mother.

Listen to one family's experience with adoption reunification. Learn about how their adult daughter reunfied with her birth mother and biolgical brothers. Learn more about what adult adoption reunfication is really like and one family's journey.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption, giving adoption a voice.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast Season 2 Episode 142: Reunification, My Story

I was born in 1973 and placed for adoption prviately. My adoption was a closed adoption. I looked to find my birth mother and was sucessfully reunited in 2007. Listen as I talk about what that was like, how it felt and what I have learned. Adoption reunifications can be as different as snowflakes and adoptees or birth parents may have different reasons for wanting to reunify, but there is still one commonality: connection.

Connection, whether it be for learning more about your family medical history, to "find yourself", to learn about your heritage, to develop and have a relationship is still wanted to join. Join me as we discuss my story which may educate others about what adoption reunifcation is really like.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast Season 2 Ep.141: Factors That Can Prevent Someone From Adopting

Not every person who wants to be an adoptive parent will be qualified or eligible to adopt. The way eligibility is determined is through the adoption home study process. Every state has their own individual requirements to be eligible to adopt.

In this podcast we are going to focus on the specificities of Arizona Adoption Home Studies In the state of Arizona, adoption home studies are governed by the Arizona Revised Statutes. The State of Arizona requires that your home study social worker spend at least 4 hours with you face-to-face during a minimum of 2 visits. At least 2 of these hours must be spent in your home.

During this process, adoptive parents may need to provide: Court Issued Marriage Licenses and Divorce DecreesPrevious Year’s Tax Return5 Letters of Reference (2 from family, 3 from friends)An AutobiographyCPS ClearanceFingerprint ClearanceAdoption EducationMarriage License – (if applicable) Divorce Decree(s) – (if applicable) Military Discharge(s) – (if applicable)More Factors that may influence the ability for someone to adopt: Felony Conviction- Adoption is prohibited for any person who has been convicted of felony child abuse or neglect, drugs or alcohol abuse, or domestic violence.DishonestySignificant Medical and or Mental Health Issues that could impede the ability to parentListen to learn more

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast Season 2; Ep. 140: Sharing Fatherhood

“It is not flesh and blood but the heart which makes us fathers and sons.”– Johann Friedrich von Schiller

Birth fathers may be an important part of the adoption; whether they are directly or indirectly involved is their choice. Birth fathers have their own feelings, thoughts and emotions regarding the adoption of their baby. There are both similarities and differences in sharing fatherhood between the birth father and the adoptive father.

The open adoption relationship between the birth father and adoptive father may be influenced by external and internal factors.

"Dad and I had the closest, most intimate relationship. We acted alike. We had the same interests ... he had so much love for me." – The late president Gerald Ford describing his relationship with his adoptive father.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast Season 2 Ep. 139: Sharing Motherhood

Sharing motherhood between two women is something that can be extremely hard to conceptualize or accept. When a woman chooses to make an adoption plan, she selflessly chooses to share her role as a mother with an adoptive mother. This choice is an incredible one.

Sharing motherhood is an incredibly complicated concept; internal and external factors can influence a birth mother and an adoptive mother’s view or stance on their ability to share motherhood. This podcast discusses both the internal and external factors that come into play and how a positive relationship can be established and maintained,

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast 138: Why Choosing Adoption for an Unplanned Pregnancy May Be Benefit A Birth Mother’s Other Biological Children

Choosing adoption for an unplanned pregnancy is one thing when you do not have other children to consider, but another when you do. Choosing adoption in these cases may benefit your other children in ways you may not even realize. If you are pregnant and currently struggling to provide the necessary items for your children on a daily basis, bringing another child into your life could push you further behind finaicially and make it more difficult for you to provide the necessary items. This struggle could be both financial but also could be emotional as well. Adoption is a choice and this podcast outlines the benefits for the other biological children in the home.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2: 137: Biological Grandparents Role in the Adoption Process

What roles can Birth Grandparents play in an adoption plan?

The “birth grandparents” are direct lineage to the adopted child, their medical history and social history matter to both the adoptee, the Aps and the birth parents. They are more than just an extension of the BPs they can contribute the following: Be a source of support for the Birth Parentss, especially when discussing the adoption plan with family and friendsBe a voice of reason when or if the Birth Parents struggle with their adoption choiceSupport the Birth Parents in making choices regarding the adoption plan Assist in choosing an Adoptive FamilyWhat type of a PACACreating the Hospital PlanBe the Birth Parents’ Emergency contactCome to the hospital when the Birth Mother goes into labor, comfort and support. You can never have too many grandparents!

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption, Season 2, Episode 136: Adoption Matters; 2020 A Year in Review

Take a walk back with us as we review 2020 in the adoption world.

Looking back at 2020, we discuss all the factors that played into successful and unsuccesfful adoption outcomes. We look at the status of the Paul Peterson case. We look at where the abortion laws stand today.

Follow us on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter: Azadoptpodcast

Happy New Year!!!!!!

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, Ep. 135: The CHRISTMAS EPISODE

Remember to: Give yourself and your family grace regarding phone calls/skypes and facetime since COVID-19 has prevented so many families get together.Avoiding holiday parties and get togethers is the best idea for a newborn for many reasons- and COVID-19 adds another layer!Relish in the small things.Make little special memory holiday crafts (ornaments in honor of this year.)Newborns do not have memories of the holidays and can only see them through pictures- so take a lot!Having a newborn is a great excuse to do only the things you want to do. Most importantly make memories and document: pictures/videos/ journaling/etc…When cleaning or bringing in new items- use the old adage- in with new- out with the old. (Remember to DONATE)If friends or family members ask for Christmas ideas- suggest things like donations to a college fund for new baby or a maybe a CD to be used towards college.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption S 2 Ep.134: Choosing CPS/DCS Over Adoption- P2

When making the choice to work with DCS, Birth Mothers may be given the opportunity to participate in services to rectify the issue that brought their baby into the state’s care and custody.

The Department of Child Safety Reunification Plan may include the following depending on the birth mother’s circumstances for the state’s involvement: treatment services to help the Birth Mother obtain and maintain a sober lifestyle that will allow/permit for a safe environment in which for the baby to reside.Random drug screeningRandom home visitsA stable and safe housing situationA safety monitorSupervised visits with her babyParenting Classes

When experiencing an unplanned pregnancy, sometimes there may not be a favorable option. These two paths are quite different journeys and understandably can present a difficult decision. For some women, after delivering their baby they must choose between private adoption or placing their baby in the care and custody of Department of Child Safety (in some states this entity is referred to as Child Protective Services.) In some instances, Birth Mothers make the decision to work with the Department of Child Safety (DCS), while other Birth Mother continue their private adoption plan. The reasons behind their choices may vary for each Birth Mother.

Some of the topics we will be discussing over these two podcasts include the following: Why would a birth mother who has made an adoption plan, chose an adoptive family and has been in the adoption program for a good amount of time- choose DCS?What are the advantages and disadvantages of choosing DCS over an existing or non-existing adoption plan?What can be done to try to avoid the DCS intervention from disrupting the adoption plan?Why does DCS get involved when there is an adoption plan in place?Can DCS place with the adoptive family that was matched with the birth mother if she chooses DCS?

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, 132: The Profile of a Birth Father

Some interesting things that the public may not understand or be aware of regarding birth fathers: We see repeat birth fathers with different birth mothers at different times.Birth fathers can have access to many adoption services, but rarely engage: CounselingCommunication with the Adoptive ParentsDevelop an independent relationship with the adoptive familySign Adoption ConsentsDevelop a Post Adoption Communication Agreement with the adoptive familyBirth fathers can have a significant influence over whether a birth mother follows through in her adoption plan.Birth fathers need to feel a part of the process and treated with respect and may not have as much knowledge of how adoption works as a birth mother may. Educating a birth father may increase his cooperation and support with the birth mother.Birth fathers may be reluctant/uncomfortable with the adoption process for the following reasons: Sometimes they fear it looks like a failure on their part to provide for their BM or childThey don’t know how to explain the process to friends and familyThey may have other children with other women who did not place their child for adoptionThey may fear that the BM may not stay with them after the adoption finalizesThey aren’t sure if they baby is theirs and they do not want to parent if the baby is not theirs.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, #131: Birth Mother Expenses

Both adoptive parent and birth parents have many questions surrounding birth parent funding. This podcast will address birth parent expenses and what an adoption agency or adoption attorney in the State of Arizona is allowed to disburse to a birth mother. This podcast is geared to the laws for Arizona State only, however for those living in a state with alternative laws, this will give you insight into why, what, how, when and so forth; thereby offering an in depth understanding of the rules, regulations, and practices of birth parent expenses.

First and foremost, birth parents pay zero fees for their adoption services. Ultimately, adoptive families are the funding source for birth parents, while the adoption agency may undergird the birth parents initial expenses.

All birth parents may not financially qualify for financial assistance with their living expenses, but regardless they pay no fees. The formula is calculated by our legal department and they determine how much funding the birth parents are allowed to receive.

Living expenses need to be related to the pregnancy, which is why birth father’s expenses are not included. The presumption is that he does not have the medical condition of pregnancy.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, 130: Being the Bearer of Bad Tidings

Sometimes in the adoption world, we have to deliver bad news.

No one likes to be the bearer of bad news. One of the reason is they are the ones to catch the brunt of the bad news, regardless of whether it is within their control or not.

The concerns of the deliverer of bad news really focus on: How to manage their own anxietyHow deliver the news without altering or impairing the news, while making sure they do the best they can and harm the recipient the least: TimingMethodSupportLocationWord precisionFollow-up Listen to one of our own at Building Arizona Families, Adoptive Parent Case Manager, Sarah discuss how she assists families when she has to deliver bas news and how she processes and prepares for it herself.

No one loves the messenger who brings bad news.--Sophocles

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast, Season 2, Episode 129: Understanding Desperation in Adoption

Some Birth Mothers come into an adoption agency because they are pregnant, and many women have reached a point of desperation due to situations such as: Being Homeless; scared to remain on the street due to being pregnant, and they are hungry and cold/hotThe pregnancy may be the result of an act of prostitution/solicitation or they may be a victim of abuse.Feeling trapped in a domestically violent relationship and wanting to make sure that they don’t bring a baby into their turbulent world.Pregnant as a result of an affair and they don’t want their significant other to find out (he may be incarcerated) or together they may not want to raise the baby together since the baby was conceived in an affair.Divorcing their spouse and they do not want to raise a baby under these circumstances.Finding out that they are pregnant and choose not to have an abortion and/or they find out too late in their pregnancy. Maybe they don’t believe in abortion or cannot afford it? Learn more about desperation and how it can manifest and affect adoption by tuning in!

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, 128: Birth Mother Support

Birth Mothers need and want your support as an adoptive family.

Here are some ways you can effectively show your support.

(Always make sure these ideas and suggestions are in compliance with your state adoption laws, your attorney and/ or agency adoption laws.) Send support notes to your birth mother that are handwritten that she can save forever. A small note can carry a big message. Make sure that you understand what is appropriate to include and avoid anything that could be deemed as “coercion.”If a holiday occurs during the time you are matched, make sure you find out what your adoption entity allows and partake in any event or gift they suggest. Focusing on the birth mother rather than on the baby she is carrying.If your adoption agency or attorney informs you of an unexpected situation and you are given the option of additionally funding for your birth mother, maybe for a type of housing, an unforeseen expense or someone of that nature- give serious consideration to doing so if financially you are able to.Really consider compromising on the baby’s name. This will be a HUGE concession with a birth mother. We have discussed the importance of this before and I cannot reiterate this enough- this has caused adoption disruptions, negatively impacted adoptive and birth parent relationships after placement.When arriving at the hospital- don’t arrive empty handed. A basket of hospital necessities for your birth mother may be very well received and appreciated. Your birth mother will not leave empty handed and she will most likely use and enjoy the following items: Fuzzy socksLotionMints or candyA hair brush and hair ties

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, 127: Why Holidays Can Be Hard

Holidays can be tough on people regardless of whether or nor they have an adoption plan. Sometimes both Adoptive Families and Birth Parents have a difficult time. Christmas is considered by many to be the “most wonderful time of the year,” but often it is just magnifying the trying times you may be experiencing . The holidays can magnify senses of loss and grief. Memories of past holidays both good and bad can trigger various emotions and can be painful reminders of loss.

Birth Mothers

A reminder of the “Hallmark” Christmas cards, the perfect family, the perfect children and the perfect holiday.
Feeling alone when others are celebrating.
Childhood memories.

Adoptive Families If just beginning the adoption process the holidays can be a reminder that parethood hasnt happened yet.If in an adoption program but not matched, the holidays may increase anxiety about the wait to parenthood.If matched with a birth mother and waiting for the baby to be born, the focus of the holidays may not be on the forefront.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, 126: What Happens When a Family Walks Away

Sometimes an adoptive family is matched with a birth mother and changes their mind and walks away either after being matched or after the baby is born. This podcast will dive into the reasons as to why adoptive families would pour time, resources and emotions into an adoptive match and then walks away from the birth mother and the baby they planned on adopting. Why? How often does this happen? What happens next? Listen to this podcast and find out more!

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, 125: Covid-19 & Adoption Updates

Updates on Covid-19 as they impact and affect birth mothers/birth fathers and adoptive families.

What we as an adoption agency are doing: Masks are mandatoryTemperature checksFollowing all social distancing guidelinesMedical grade air purifiersAcrylic ShieldsHandwashing / Hand Sanitizer are available and advisedOffices are professionally cleaned & sanitizedIn Maricopa County, some hospitals have eased up on their protocols regarding visitors and support people during labor and delivery. However, with rising Covid-19 numbers, we are seeing a little more restriction.We cannot always allow visits after babies get discharged from the hospitals at this time if their health is compromised or they have been in the ICU or the pediatrician has concerns.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, 124: Is Adoption a Taboo Subject?

Definition of taboo according to the Merriam-webster.com/dictionary

a: a prohibition imposed by social custom or as a protective measure…

b: something that is not acceptable to say, mention, or do : something that is taboo…

As part of the adoption community, it is our responsibility to increase adoption awareness, promote adoption education and dispel myths. Facts are what will set adoption from being considered taboo.

Reasons why society may have considered adoption a taboo subject:

Perceptions / Myths / Half-Truths If a couple cannot biologically conceive a child, adoption may be considered a default choice.Adoptive parents may feel pressured to be the “perfect parents.”Adoptees are often told that they are “lucky” to be adopted.Concerns regarding an open adoption.To adoptees, sometimes being adopted means being different.Birth parents may feel pressured to parent rather than to place their child for adoption.Classifying an adoptee into a category separating him/her from their peers.Topic of Post adoption communication.Drug use during a birth mother’s pregnancy.A birth mother’s mental health.The adoptive preferences that both the birth parents and adoptive parents have during their match process.Word choices people use: An adoptee’s “real parents”"Give up" baby for adoption

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, Podcast 123: Factors Contributing to Successful Adoptions

Many adoptive families inquiring about adoption what they could have done to increase their chances of their adoption being a success. We have spoken in previous podcasts about why adoptions sometimes fail due to the birth mother or birth parents. So that begs the question; can adoptive families do anything to improve or increase the chances? YES. Also, sometimes it is the adoptive family that changes their mind about adoptive the baby from their matched birth mother.

Adoptive Families have a bigger influence over their adoption success than they may realize. There are things you as an adoptive family can do to improve the likelihood of a successful adoption. Here are some suggestions that may increase your chances: When you create your adoption profile book, make sure you send a copy of it to the adoption agency, even if your birth mother was presented with a pdf. Most birth parents love to keep a copy of the adoption profile and memorize it during the course of their pregnancy. It also gives them comfort to see photos of the adoptive family over and over again, the house the baby will live in and the people the baby will be surrounded by.If you have an open adoption and you live out of state and the birth mother is open to you traveling to see her before she delivers- DO IT! It is much easier to build a relationship over the phone and skype of facetime if you have met at in person. Often times meeting in person will show your birth mother how much she means to you and the sacrifices and lengths you are willing to go to establish a lifelong relationship with her... There are so many suggestions, listen to the podcast and learn more ways to possibly increase your chances of a successful adoption.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, 221: Holding a Marriage Together When an Adoption or Fertility Treatment Doesnt Work Out

Steps to Take to Preserve Your Marriage

Factors that have a negative impact on marital success, happiness and cohesion after the unsuccessful journey to become parents: Grieving the loss of their dreams and expectations of having childrenstillborn births and miscarriages The blame gameThe relationship or spouse may be a reminder of childlessness.Tension / Anxiety / Stress / Depression / Social IsolationInsecurity of Fertility IssuesOne spouse wants to stop trying and the other spouse does not Agree on a Plan to ParenthoodKeep your Plan to Parenthood between the two of you and agree not to consult family and friends on their thoughts or opinions. Understand that you and your spouse may not process grief or stress in the same mannerGive grace whether or not its deserved to your spouseAgree to always communicate your feelings and emotions to each other without fear of judgementMake mutual decisions- remove the blame factorGo through the journey together, hear any news together. If one spouse starts to struggle, be the partner you would want your spouse to be if the situation was reversed. Don’t ever use the inability to bear biological children as a weapon in an argumentRemember that this journey is leading you both to parenthood. Your path may be longer than your neighbor’s but that only means that you will have more adventures; maybe both good and bad.

Birth Mother Matters Season 2 Podcast 120: When Families Are Not Ready to Adopt

What can happen when families are not ready to adopt but begin the process anyway? Marital DiscordDepression / Anxiety / PanicHave a lower level of satisfaction with the adoption processDifficulty engaging in the adoption process and bonding with your birth motherMaking decisions that may not have been made had in desperation that you may not be happy with laterAreas where Adoptive families may not be ready to begin an adoption plan.Unresolved griefDiscord between spousesLack of education

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast, Season 2: Episode 119:

Sexual Violence & Its impact On Pregnancy and Adoption

The CDC defines sexual violence as a sexual activity when consent in not obtained or not freely given. It is a serious public health problem in the United States. Sexual violence impacts every community and affects people of all genders, sexual orientations, and ages—anyone can experience or perpetrate sexual violence. The perpetrator of sexual violence is usually someone known to the victim, such as a friend, current or former intimate partner, coworker, neighbor, or family member.

National Sexual Assault Hotline. Free. Confidential. 24/7

1800-656-4673 or 1800-656-HOPE

National Human Trafficking Resource Center

This is a national anti-trafficking hotline and resource center serving victims, survivors and the anti-trafficking community. 1-888-373-7888 (TTY: 711) Text 233733

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, #118: Domestic Violence & Its impact On Pregnancy and Adoption

The National Institutes of Health (NIH) estimates abusers target more than 300,000 pregnant women in the U.S. each year, adding that the number may be even higher than that given the reluctance of survivors to disclose abuse, especially during pregnancy.

Published in March 2017, in BJOG: An International Journal of Obstetrics and Gynaecology, the results show intimate partner violence during pregnancy is “significantly associated with” preterm birth (before 38 weeks) and low birth weight, finding that women who endured abuse while pregnant were almost twice as likely to deliver their babies preterm.

The National domestic violence hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or 1-800-787-3224 (TTY) offers help to anyone involved in a domestic violence situation. They help victims as well as survivors, friends and family members. They also provide information on sexual assault, battering intervention and prevention programs. Please make sure to call them if you need help.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, 117:One in Four, Part 2 of 2

If you or someone you care about has lost a child to stillbirth, miscarriage, SIDS, or any other cause at any point during pregnancy or infancy, please join us in raising awareness this month for October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. Learn what to say and what not to say to famile is experiencing a miscarriage or stillbirth.Understand why our society has groomed us to not disclose to others about the loss of a baby.Learn about foundations that are supporting families in their time of need and what assistance is available.

nilmdtsawareness

internationalwaveoflight

nilmdts

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption: One in Four, Part 1 of 2

October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month

It may be uncomfortable to talk about miscarriages or stillbirths, but when we say nothing about the loss of the baby, the grief is not acknowledged. Just because a birth mother is placing a baby for adoption does not mean she does not care about her baby, actually the opposite is true- she loves her baby so much that she is making the hardest choice. In my experience when a birth mother miscarries or has a stillbirth, she suffers incredibly, questioning herself if the reason the baby passed away was her fault, did her baby not feel loved enough or wanted and was that why?

When we are silent about perinatal loss, we send the message that there is no space for mourning, leaving adoptive and birth families isolated and alone in their grief. The goal of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month of breaking the silence and stigma surrounding pregnancy and infant loss. This month honors the millions of families who have experienced loss through miscarriage, stillbirth, or infant death.

Pregnancy and infant loss impacts so many families. 1 in 4 pregnancies end in miscarriage.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, 115: Birth Control & Adoption Part 2 of 2

Birth control continues to be a topic that many are still uncomfortable speaking about. Due to the rating of this podcast, we will be using very general language, please note that this episode may contain language not suitable for children. Since this podcast is about adoption- the precursor is pregnancy and the precursor to pregnancy is a lack of or ineffective birth control, therefore we feel this is a topic that we must address.

This podcast is part 2 of 2.

Choosing adoption means choosing an option with support, aftercare and access to financial resources. Adoption is a beautiful choice and one that is increasingly becoming a more popular choice. If you are pregnant and are considering adoption, we are a licensed, full-service, non-profit Arizona Adoption Agency. We believe in adoption aftercare services and have a program on site to provide continued support through the Donna K. Evans Foundation. You can contact us 24/7 at (623) 695-4112. You are not alone and we want to help, thank you for considering adoption, you are making an amazing choice.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast Season 2 Ep. 114 Birth Control P. 1 of 2

Birth control continues to be a topic that many are still uncomfortable speaking about. Due to the rating of this podcast, we will be using very general language, please note that this episode may contain language not suitable for children. Since this podcast is about adoption- the precursor is pregnancy and the precursor to pregnancy is a lack of or ineffective birth control, therefore we feel this is a topic that we must address.

Women who place a baby for adoption may return to our adoption agency to place a second baby or maybe even a third.

The most commonly asked question is how and why does that occur?

The best answer to this: a lack of birth control or ineffective birth control due to inaccurate usage or damaged/expired birth control methods. When I speak with women who come to our agency to place a baby for adoption, we speak about their pregnancy and this conversation takes place whether it is their first adoption with us or their 3rd. These are the answers I receive when I asked them how they became pregnant: “Didn’t use birth control.”“I forgot to get my shot.”“I wanted to have kids.”“I thought I couldn’t get pregnant.”“I had my tubes tied.”“He told me he couldn’t have kids.”“We have never had to use birth control before.”“I thought he was going to take care of it.”“I have no idea.”

Birth Mother Matters In Adoption Season 2 Episode 113: C-Sections in Adoption

When making a hospital plan, if you are going to be having a scheduled c-section, you can completely detail how you want everything to go. Normally when having a c-section, you can have one support person in the operating room with you. Sometimes birth mothers choose the birth father, a family member or friend, the adoptive mother, or the adoption case worker. Some other benefits of having a c-section when placing a baby for adoption are: You can plan around the dates of your c-section; if you are working then you can notify your job of when you will deliver, you can get things accomplished that you want to have achieved before delivery without having to worry about when you will deliver.The adoptive family can plan to be in town if they are coming from another state, rather than trying to catch the next flight out.You have more time (for recovery purposes) in the hospital which gives you more time to bond with the adoptive family and see your baby.Most likely, you won’t have to worry about being pregnant past your due date. If you are listening and you are dealing with an unplanned pregnancy and want more information about adoption, we are a local Arizona Adoption Agency. We are available 24/7 by phone or text at (623) 695-4112. We can make an immediate appointment with you to get started on creating an Arizona Adoption Plan or just give you more information.

Birth Mother Matters In Adoption Season 2 Episode 112:Gender Reveal Celebrations

Gender Reveal Parties / Celebrations have become increasingly popular, incuding in the adoption community. Birth mothers love to be able to surprise their adoptive families with the gender of their baby! These Gender Reveal Celebrations can be conducted with assistance from the adoption agency, either in person or through the mail, text message or Skype or Facetime. The Gender Reveal Celebrations can be inexpensive and very exciting! Listen to learn more about adoption and Gender Reveal Celebrations!

The only real way two adopted children can have the same adoption story is if the same biological parents place a second baby for adoption with the same adoptive family, with the same Post Placement Communication Agreement, and even then there may be a different set of circumstances. Because children don’t generally like to be singled out of feel different you can point out the following “non-traditional families”

Children generally want to be like everyone else, so adding words in front of -siblings, -sister, -brother, just gives a shout out that this is not a traditional relationship. Adopted Siblings/ Adopted Sisters/ Adopted BrothersFoster Siblings/ Foster Sisters/ Foster BrothersStep Siblings/ Step Sisters/ Step-BrothersHalf Siblings/ Half Sisters/ Half Brothers Adoption stories can be handled with care to not over-inflate or segregate a child’s personal history. The focus can be on how much this child means to the family and how their life journey will be very similar his or her siblings, since they are being raised together. Changing the focus after discussing their adoption story to the here and now and what they can do gives the child control and power, which is important when a child feels a lack of control as they may feel if their adoption story is compared to a sibling’s adoption or birth story. At the end of the day, we are really just talking about family. Make th focus on what a family is and what makes a family.

Podcast 110- Part 1 of 2: When Another Adopted Sibling Joins the Family

“Not by blood, but bonded to each other just the same.” – Unknown

Listen and learn about adopting a second baby. Listen to answers to commonly asked questions regarding adopting a second child.

Common Questions Asked by Adoptive Families: When is the “best” time to begin a second adoption?Should I adopt a baby again to maintain the birth order?Should I adopt the same race as my first baby?What if the Birth Parents of my adopted child experience a second unplanned pregnancy and choose adoption? Should I wait and see if this happens?Should I choose a gender this time?What if I prepare my child for this baby and the birth parents change their mind about placing the baby for adoption?What if the Birth Parents want a different type of Post Adoption Communication Agreement?After I bring my second baby home - how do I answer the question- “are they siblings?”“How many babies are enough? Our birth parents keep coming back pregnant, but I don’t want to not adopt our children’s siblings?”“Our second adopted child has a very different adoption story” – how do I explain this to both of our children?

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, 109: The Pressure of Not Adopting

People are “peer pressured” for different reasons in their lives and the types of pressure change with age group.

The reasons for birth parents choosing not to parent are sometimes very reflective of why non-birth parents choose to not have children; they are not in a stable relationship, they have personal goals they want to achieve (a maybe certain level of school), they want to begin a new career and climb the ladder, or maybe after having one child, they think- I have reached my limit.

Everyone may not be meant to be a parent, some people have very high career goals that will absolutely monopolize every moment of their time, others may have dreams of exotic and frequent travel, others may just want to focus on the married or single life and have a clean house or maybe they really just don’t like children or feel the responsibility of being a parent is overwhelming.

Making a choice to be a parent is a wonderful gift, choice and opportunity, but only if its' one you want. Being told; “when you see your baby- you will fall in love” or “I understand I felt the same way and when I became a mom I loved it” or “Your biological clock is ticking- its now or never.” Don’t allow yourself to succumb to this pressure, make a decison that is best for you and if married, your spouse.

Adoption is a wonderful choice, if becoming a parent or expanding your family is your goal.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, 108: The " What Ifs" in Adoption

A major concern of many birth parents and adoptive families is what happens if my adoption does not go as planned? In life, so many of us worry about the “what ifs?” We have these worries and fears regardless of whether we are making an adoption plan, pregnant, embarking on a new life journey, about to make a change in life or maybe just struggle with fear and anxiety.

For birth parents, your adoption plan, you are in control as much as anyone can be. You get to make the decisions about your baby, you get to choose the adoptive family and you get to decide how you want the process to go. There are aspects of an adoption that will be out of your control, but going into an adoption, try to understand that some of these aspects would be the same if you were pregnant and planning on parenting.

For adoptive families; you can choose what adoption agency you would like to work with, what your adoption match preferences are and which birth mothers you would like to be presented to. This is where a lot of adoptive families can struggle, in many ways it is like infertility, there is only so much you can control and adoption is a journey. When you embark on a journey sometimes you don’t know where the road will lead to, adoption can have the same unknowns. Sometimes things change on a dime, sometimes for the better and sometimes for the worse.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, 107: Adoption in Uganda

When a crime is committed, there are ripple effects and sometimes, especially in the cases of adoption fraud, many vicitms. Stories like the one about the agency European Adoption Consulants scare families who are interested in adopting, but know that they scare other agencies and indiviuals in the adoption field as well. For professionals working in the adoption world, for the right reasons; for the birh paremts, the adoptees and the adoptive families, we all recognize that the actions of one agency can gove everyone elsse in the industry a black eye. Learning about what what happened and why allows us as an agency and you as a listener learn a little bit more, becomes more educated so something like what happened in Uganda never happens again.

There are many children throughout the world who are in need of parents. Economic or social issues have led to conditions in some countries where they cannot provide enough homes for their children who are in need of adoption. Building Arizona Families is dedicated to helping find adoptive families from across the United States who are ready to offer these children a safe, loving, and permanent family. Building Arizona Families is a licensed Hague adopion agency.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, 106: Adoption Questions & Answers

Over the past 5 decades, adoption has drastically changed and all for the better. The option of (for the majority of women) women being sent away to pregnancy homes to have their babies, place them for adoption and return to their own home and pretend as if their pregnancy never occurred. Pregnant women who choose adoption are now and can be celebrated for making a beautiful choice. Adoption doesnt have to be whispered anymore or a secret locked away. TImes have changed in the adoption world and the adoption world is better for it. Listen to this podcast and learn.

If you are facing an unplanned pregnancy and considering adoption, a licensed adoption agency is your best option. Local licensed adoption agencies can meet with you face to face, hold your hand when needed, and can remain with you throughout your pregnancy. In addition, you can visit your case worker after placement. Building Arizona Families is a licensed adoption agency that can walk with you every step of the way. We would love to hear from you to find out how we can help. You can call or text us 24/7 at 623.695-4112.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Season 2, Episdoe 105 : Effects of Adoption Reunification on Children of an Adult Adoptee

Listen to the eldest daughter of Kelly Rourke-Scarry, Michelle discuss the impact of her mother reunifying with her biological graandmother (Kelly Rourke-Scarry's biological mother, Donna K. Evans.) Learn about the positive impact reunification can have on more family members other than just the adoptee. Listen to Michelle talk about the woman who made the bravest choice of adoption; what Donna K. Evans was really like, her experience with her and what she learned from her. Learn about the impact of Michelle's relationship with her biological grandmother when they reunified. Its raw, real and eye-opening!

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast #104: Adoption Profile Books

Adoption Profile Books are a book that an adoptive family creates for the birth parents to see when choosing an adoptive family. The Adoption Profile Books include pictures, a letter to the birth mother/birth father, and explains their lives; pets, favorite things, their house and a little about their lives. Robyn is the Match Coordinator for Building Arizona Families and has assisted hundreds and hundreds of perspective adoptive families create their profile book. Robyn is an Adoptive Mother herself.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption 2 #103: Confessions of an Adoption Agency Director

Here is the raw, the real and the behind the curtain information. I have no inhibitions about discussing these issues that we are about to dive into; everything we do- we do transparently.

Is Domestic Adoption Risky?

Yes, in can be. Just as infertility may be risky or a traditional pregnancy. Risk is an all-encompassing word and there are varying degrees. Some adoptions may appear less risky or more risky at various stages of the adoption journey.

Some adoptions may start out as a lower type risk adoption, but circumstances in the birth parent’s lives may change, which in turn may make their adoption plan less stable. Examples may be: their financial situation may change in a positive direction, family members may take issue with their adoption choice, or maybe they may not form a connection with their adoptive family- as they had expected.

Listen to this podcast to learn.

Birth Mother Matters In Adoption Season 2 #102 Living With Your Parent's Choices

Join us today as we talk with John Simpson, Ron Reigns' (Simpson's) adult son discuss his thoughts and feelings about learning that his parents made an abortion choice prior to his conception. Ron Reigns has discussed his regret over the abortion choice he nad his ex-wife made prior to John and now our listeners can hear the thoughts and feelings John has about their choice. John is raw and candid as he shares his perspective on how thier abortion choice impacted his life. John follows in his father's footsteps as he candidly dicusses what impact an abortion choice can have on a sibling. The ripple effect of abortion completely becomes unveiled in this episode.

Welcome to Podcast Season 2

Episode 101

During this episode we will be taking a look back at the past year of Podcasts and a sneak peak at the look forward.

Our listeners have shown a particular interest in certain topics and so we will be exploring some adoption topics in particular in more detail, from different perspectives and talking with experts in the adoption field. We love to get feedback and hear from you!

The topics that seem to be particularly of interest that we will be diving into include: AbortionAdoption Disruptions From both perspectives: Adoptive Families & Birth MothersBeginning the Adoption Process from both perspectivesPreparing for your adoption JourneyBeing picked by a birth mother, making an Adoption Profile BookAdoption & Abortions News Topics that we touched on and now we are going to dive into: ICWAHearing from Birth Mothers and Adoptive FamiliesICPCLegal Experts& More!!! Join us!

Abortion Adoption Disruptions From both perspectives: APs & BMsBeginning the Adoption Process from both perspectivesPreparing for your adoption JourneyBeing picked by a birth mother, making a profile bookAdoption & Abortions news and happenings Topics We are touched on and now we are going to dive into: ICWAHearing from Birth Mothers and Adoptive FamiliesICPCLegal ExpertsAnd so much more

Birth Mother Matters In Adoption Episode 100: The End of Era

Listen to the recap of our first hundred episodes! Celebrate with us as we reach our 100th episode!!!!!!!!!!!

Adoptive Family Case Manager on Disruptions Part 2 of of 2

This Podcast tackles the topic of Disruptions in Domestic Adoption. We are re-visiting thi adoption topic because it is one that adoptive families have so many questions and concerns about. Becky is an Adoptive Parent Case Manager Supervisor, the Hospital Case Manager Supervisor and case manages adoptive families herself. She has been with Building Arizona Families for years and shares what happens when adoptions don't have a happy ending. Being an adoptive mother herself, she is able to give personal and professional insight. Listen as she talks about adoptive families' grief and triumph when adoption journeys are taken. Hear the perspective taken by someone who is not only an adoptive mother but sometimes has to deliver the worst adoption news possible.

If you are listening and you are dealing with an unplanned pregnancy and want more information about adoption, we are a local Arizona Adoption Agency. We are available 24/7 by phone or text at (623) 695-4112. We can make an immediate appointment with you to get started on creating an Arizona Adoption Plan or just give you more information.

Birth Mother Matters Adoption 98: Adoptive Family Case Manager on Disruptions Part of of 2

This Podcast tackles the topic of Disruptions in Domestic Adoption. We are re-visiting thi adoption topic because it is one that adoptive families have so many questions and concerns about. Becky is an Adoptive Parent Case Manager Supervisor, the Hospital Case Manager Supervisor and case manages adoptive families herself. She has been with Building Arizona Families for years and shares what happens when adoptions don't have a happy ending. Being an adoptive mother herself, she is able to give personal and professional insight. Listen as she talks about adoptive families' grief and triumph when adoption journeys are taken. Hear the perspective taken by someone who is not only an adoptive mother but sometimes has to deliver the worst adoption news possible.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption 97: Updates: Adoption and Abortion News

New happenings in the Adoption World have not had any drastic changes, Covid-19 has overshadowed so many aspects of our lives. Still, adoption continues and famlies continue to grow.

The Abortion World continues to stay in turmoil. There are lots of happenings; new laws being passed, appealed and new proposals happening. Learn what is happening on the outside, become knowledgeable and learn how so many are fighting for the lives of babies, even in the midst of the Covid-19 Pandemic.

We are here for our listeners, focusing on our goal of elevating adoption education and the promotion of life.

Stay Safe.

Podcast 96: Adoption Agency Front Line Workers- Birth Mother Case Manager Assistants

Learning about the roles within an adoption agency.

Adoption Birth Mother Case Management Assistants are the support team for the birth mother case managers. Their roles, duties and responsibilities include the following: Birth Mother intakesAssisting with Birth Mother housing during her pregnancyAssist in financial assistance distributionArranging and providing transportation for medical appointmentsAssist in ordering, stocking and building food boxes for the food pantryAssisting Birth Mother Case Managers when they have a time conflict between two birth mothers and need a second handThey can help execute Birth Mother DocumentsThey also can assist in the Donna Kay Evans Program Listen to one of Building Arizona Families' Birth Mother Case Manager Assistants: Amber! You will hear answers to questions like: How long have you been a BM CM Assistant?What is your favorite/least favorite aspect?What surprised you in learning about adoptions?What would you say to someone interested in becoming an BM CM Assistant? Education is the key to understanding all about adoptions. Learn more now!

The Ugly Side of Adoption: Failed Adoption Matches, Disruptions and Dissolutions Part 2

Regarding the financial aspect of a disruption. Our attorney has been very strict about not deviating from our contract. What many adoptive families don’t understand is why they don’t get refunded their money in these situations. What financially goes into an adoption includes: Agency insurancelegal feesInvestigation servicesBirth father notification servicesCase management for both the birth mother and adoptive familyAgency overhead costs In this Podcast, listen to our Director of Operations, Adam Scarry discuss what happens financially when adoptions don't have a happy ending. Some of the topics he will be addressing are: What role do you play in dealing with failed adoption plans?Why do adoptive families reach out to you after they are unhappy with the answers they receive from their case worker?What have you learned from working with adoptive families during this difficult time?

Birth Mother Matter in Adoption Episode 94: The Ugly Side of Adoption Failed Adoption Matches, Disruptions and Dissolutions Part 1

What’s the difference between a failed adoption match, an adoption disruption and adoption dissolution?

Terminology: Failed Adoption Match is when a birth mother, has established herself with a prospective adoptive family and decides not to procced with an adoption plan or that prospective adoptive family.Adoption Disruption is the interruption of an adoption prior to finalization. It is also called a "failed adoption" or a "failed placement."Adoption Dissolution is the interruption or "failure" of an adoption after finalization. When adoptions fail- What no one wants to hear or think about when they are planning their family and traditional methods are not an option. Do they happen? How often? Why? Who is to blame? What happens to the adoptive family financially? What happens to the birth mother?

Words cannot erase that emotional pain an adoptive family is experiencing. There are no words of comfort that can be expressed by anyone at that time of loss. The interruption of an adoption can be respectfully compared to a death, its an indescribable loss.

As an adoption agency, we are all vested in the process of adoption and are very fortunate to have members of the adoption triad working on our team; giving personal insight on top of their professional insight. In my opinion, I will also state that a failed adoption matched or adoption disruption is the number one cause of adoption social worker burnout and resignation.

Birth Mother Matter in Adoption Ep. 93: Expectations vs. Reality in Adoption

One of the roles of working with an adoption agency or an adoption attorney is to make sure both the adoptive parents and the birth parents are living on Planet Reality, which can be accomplished by the following to both the adoptive parents and the birth parents: Thoroughly explaining the adoption process in great detail and making sure that both parties understand. Information is often better understood if more than one method of transmission is used to convey the dame information; oral, written, watched. Additionally, going over the information multiple times during the adoption journey, providing reminders is helpful as well. A reference guide given to the party is an additional helpful later.Have Adoption Information available and easily accessible for either party to reference:Make sure that the lines of communication are always open for either party during the duration of the adoption journey. That way questions can be quickly answered and anxiety relieved.Lastly and most importantly, make sure that both parties understand what adoption is and what adoption isn’t.

Birth Mother Matter in Adoption Ep. 92: Adoption Match Preferences Differences Between Birth Parents and Adoptive Parent

For Adoptive Families Adoption Match Preferences Drug useMental illnessOpen vs. Closed adoptionCommunicationRealistic expectationsWhat is disclosed to bms and what is notRelationship with bm: during pregnancy and afterUnderstanding the internal conflict a bm may have regarding her relationship with apsBeing able to meet a bm mentally and emotionally where they areBMs may change their mind about the hospital plan or level of contact For Birth Mothers/Fathers Education undertsanding what adoption is vs. co-parenting or fosteringOpen vs. Closed AdoptionCommunicationUnderstanding the mindset of adoptive parentsRealistic expectationsWhat is disclosed to aps and what is notRelationship with aps: during pregnancy and after For Both Sides Establishing a relationship takes time, effort and energyTrust has to be builtEvery relationship has its ups and downsEveryone needs graceAttachment is real and goodbyes can be really tough

For international adoptions, the Hague was implemented for protection of the children, birth parents and adoptive parents. The Hague Convention on Protection of Children and Co-operation in Respect of Intercountry Adoption (Hague Adoption Convention) is an international treaty that provides important safeguards to protect the best interests of children, birth parents, and adoptive parents who are involved in intercountry adoptions.

How to protect yourself against being scammed by an adoption agency, attorney or adoption professional: Learn the adoption entity’s legal business name, along with any akas, physical address, physical phone number, city business license.See who the entity is accredited through If pursuing an international adoption- Hague AccreditedSee if there are any lodged complaints and the outcomesCheck with the state licensing departmentCheck the BBB.Read and understand any contract you sign. Ask questions.Look for transparency.Check references of families who have used their adoption servicesBe aware of current adoption scams.Choose an experienced adoption professional Building Arizona Families is a licensed and Hague Accredited Adoption Agency in the State of Arizona.

Adoption is an entity where scams are a part of our reality and one where we have had to stay ahead of the scams, change our protocol and make sure that our clients understand that we take our jobs seriously. Let’s dig deeper into birth mothers by breaking scamming down; Why do birth mothers scam adoption agencies?What types of scams have you seen/witnessed?What do you do as an agency to protect the agency and adoptive families from being scammed?What can adoptive families do if they are scammed? Why do birth mothers scam adoption agencies?

Some birth mothers may attempt or succeed to some degree to scam adoption agencies because of the following: They are living on the street and are desperate for financial assistanceThey have a friend who is pregnant and working with an adoption agency and want to receive the same benefits and assistance that their friend is receivingThey have done an adoption in the past and want to receive the same assistance and benefits as they had previouslyThey may have a drug addiction and are looking for a way to financially sustain their drug habit.

What types of scams have you seen/witnessed? Women have come into the office to begin to make an adoption plan and tried to avoid taking pregnancy test.Women try to physically change a pregnancy test.Bring an altered ultrasound.Bring altered medical records.Take a pregnancy test out of the trash can.Continue an adoption plan after a miscarriage or abortion.Women pretend to be vested in an adoption plan, when their plan is to parent or to work with Child Protective Services.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption #89: Why Women Choose Adoption Again

In speaking solely for our agency, Building Arizona Families; I get asked this question often from adoptive families: “What are the chances that our child’s birth mother may get pregnant and choose adoption again?”

The answer may surprise you…very possibly.

We do everything we can as an adoption agency to assist our birth mother in leaving our adoption program after placement in a better state that she came to us in. We offer to assist birth mothers obtain birth control and assist them long term through the Donna K. Evans Program.

However, some women do find themselves experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and choose adoption again. When they come back to our program, sometimes they do want to match with the same adoptive family!

At the Donna K. Evans Foundation, our number one goal is to empower, elevate and assist women in believing that they matter, their adoption choice matters and that negative life cycles can stop. We believe in the power of hope, promise and the will to succeed. As a community of adoption supporters, it is critical to support life and the power of it. Being a believer in life does not have to stop at the birth of a baby, but continues through the life of the birth mother.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption #88: Covid-19, Adoption & Masks

AT BAF Adoptions are proceeding as normal in terms of how many women are coming into our agency and choosing to make an adoption plan. We are still taking all precautions:

Building Arizona Families and the Donna K. Evans Foundation are taking the necessary precautions to protect the health and safety of our staff, adoptive families, birth families, and contracted professionals by implementing procedures that align with guidance issued by the Arizona Department of Child Safety (DCS) along with the Centers for Disease Control (CDC). Until further notice, Building Arizona Families and the Donna K. Evans Foundation staff are taking the following measures to help prevent the spread of COVID-19: In the company of others, gloves and masks will be wornMaintaining social distancing guidelinesBoth Building Arizona Families’ and the Donna K. Evans Foundation’s offices are cleaned and sanitized daily Building Arizona Families and the Donna K. Evans Foundation management will ensure that all staff meeting in-person with clients, families, or constituents have access to appropriate personal protective equipment (PPE), in accordance with CDC guidelines. .

Podcast 88: The Pressure on Family Members When Working in the Adoption World

Working in the adoption world is an emotional rollercoaster, time becomes no longer your own, beliefs become rock solid resolute, and you want your loved ones to embrace your passion with the fierce velocity you do. This all-consuming career choice can have positive and negative effects; sometimes even when things are explained on the forefront of your career they are hard to conceptualize. The connection made between case workers and birth mothers and adoptive families is unparallel.

Often times questions asked are: What do your kids think?Does your spouse have any issues with the hours/mental/tollInterruption of family time and important eventsProjection of belief systemDinner table discussionsTravelFamily ImageChildren’s image of adoptionWhat if kids’ opinions differ When adoption social work burnout begins what does it look like to the family? How does it affect them?

When is too much – too much?

The benefits of having a family member who works in the adoption field?

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast 86: What If I Am on the Fence About Making An Adoption Plan & When is it Too Late to Place My Baby For Adoption

Sometimes life presents options and opportunities where walking a new path, paving a new road leads to choices, options an opportunities that you may not have considered before. Adoption is a choice that is as old as time, biblical and honorable. It is also a choice where you can receive support; emotionally, mentally and possibly financially during and after your pregnancy.

Sometimes situations in life change, unforeseen circumstances arise or maybe you realize that you aren’t ready or able to parent or be the parent you want for your baby.

Sometimes women experiencing an unplanned pregnancy make an adoption plan early in their pregnancy to receive assistance throughout their pregnancy, have time to develop a relationship with their chosen adoptive family and to mentally prepare themselves. Other times women are not mentally ready to accept that they are in fact pregnant and wait mentally to accept the fact that they are pregnant. When a woman waits to acknowledge that she is pregnant, she is denying herself and her baby prenatal care and may make other choices that she may not make if she knew and accepted that she is pregnant. Denial of a pregnancy does not make the pregnancy disappear nor does it change the outcome. Denial may seem easier in the moment, enabling postponing feelings, emotions, choices and reality; but long term doesn’t help. Regardless of when you choose adoption as the best plan for you and your baby, we can help and you are not alone. The first step is to call and know we will answer. We can be reached at (623) 695-4112 by phone or text 24/7.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption #85: Naming Your Baby

Adding adoption into the equation, adds another layer. This is a very, very touchy subject for all parties involved. This is the way the law works, at least here in Arizona. A birth mother can put whatever name she chooses on the birth certificate. The adoptive family can have the baby’s name legally changed when the adoption is finalized. That being said, naming can be a very, very touchy and emotional experience for all parties involved. Usually, the baby’s last name remains the birth mother’s until the adoption is finalized.

In the best situations, birth mothers and adoptive families decide on the baby’s name together and that name is kept. Here are some other situations that seem to be the next best scenarios: The birth mother and adoptive family each choose one of the baby’s names; the adoptive family chooses the first name and the birth mother chooses the second.Vice versaThe birth mother names the baby but understands that the name will be changed when the adoption is finalized. There are some ways to facilitate these best-case scenarios: The adoptive family gives the birth mother their favorite top three names and she choosesVice VersaThe adoptive family incorporates the birth mother’s name into the baby’s name with her permissionBoth sides present why their choice of name is important and when the opposing side hears the reasoning understand and agrees. A birth mother may want to name her baby and know that her baby will have this for the rest of their life. The adoptive family will get to raise the baby and allowing a birth mother this opportunity is an amazing way to show her how much you appreciate her!

Podcast 84: Getting to Know Your Poddcast Co-Hosts

Listen and learn all sorts of fun facts about your co-hosts as we dive into our own lives, so you can learn more about us.

Hearing chosts once a week and learning bits and pieces of their lives being interwoven as adoption related matters ar discussed. However, we thought it would be fun to dedicate one podcast to learn more about us as people and why we do what we do, more about our backgrounds and how they influence our thoughts, beliefs and viewpoints.

Thank you all so much for continuing to listen to us, for opening your heart and mind. The adoption community is one we feel so blessed to be a part of.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption #83: Adoption in the News

1) Gerber Babies selected first adopted baby! Magnolia Earl, a 1-year-old from California, was selected from among more than 327,000 entrants to represent Gerber in marketing campaigns.

2) The first newborn to be legally surrendered under Arkansas' new safe haven law was dropped off at a Benton fire station last week.

3) DIscussion of the Open Letter to FX about Norma McCorvey Documentary From: The Pro-life Advocates who actually knew Norma McCorvey

Choosing adoption means choosing an option with support, aftercare and access to financial resources. Adoption is a beautiful choice and one that is increasingly becoming a more popular choice. If you are pregnant and are considering adoption, we are a licensed, full-service, non-profit Arizona Adoption Agency. We believe in adoption aftercare services and have a program on site to provide continued support through the Donna K. Evans Foundation. You can contact us 24/7 at (623) 695-4112. You are not alone and we want to help, thank you for considering adoption, you are making an amazing choice. Call or Text: (623) 695-4112.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption #82: Two Lives, One Choice Part 3 of 3

With any documentary there are always people for or against the message the documentary is projecting. This particular documentary "AKA Jane Roe" is particularly controversal due to the subject matter of abortion. In the adoption community, abortion is an alternatve that negates many of the beliefs and stands of adoption; choosing lives, building families, improving the lives of birth mtohers, and so on. During this podcast we: Discuss our opinions on the film.Expectations vs. Reality of the documentaryDiscuss what we liked and didn’t likeWhat we came away with…What we believe the influence of the documentary will have on abortion We also examine what causes peoples’ opinions, beliefs, and morals to change: Life experiences/ Events in their livesEducationThe notion of “Confirmation bias,” the tendency people have to embrace information that supports their beliefs and reject information that contradicts themInterpersonal influence system Building Arizona Families believes in adoption and started the You Before Me Campaign to support and celebrate birth mothers. www.ube4me.life

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Eopside 81: Two Lives, One Choice, Part 2 of 3

Understanding both side of the abortion coin: ProLife and ProChoice will only educate either side to a greater extent, thereby enabling them better prepared to make a make life change. As a believer in the ProLife Movement, stepping back and looking at the ProChoice beliefs enables us to see where they are coming from; what data is used, what specific points are targeted along with "Where, Why and How?"

In order to extend an "olive branch" we need to meet the opposite side either in the middle on on their turf. Sometimes the promotion of a belief is just repetition on the part of the "believer" without really understanding or even having correct information. Join us as we dive into the topic of abortion and disecting the framework of why ProChoice followers subscribe to this belief.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 80: Two Lives, One Choice, Part 1 of 3

LIsten to Ron Reigns as he talks about his own experience with abortion and how it has impacted his life and his loved ones. Listen to what it is like to reveal a regretted previous abortion choice to your spouse. Listen to the heartbreaking discussion of how to discuss it with his adult son. Ron shows bravery, heroism and cander in his openess to discuss what he considers a huge regret.

From an adoption standpoint, most subscribe to two out of the three options: adoption or parenting. The adoption community’s main goals include building families, preserving lives, and assisting women who are experiencing an unplanned pregnancy. An important aspect to remember is that adoption agencies generally do not judge or condemn anyone for making an abortion choice in the past; the goal is to educate, empower and preserve future lives.

Abortion represents death, finality and loss. How can the ends ever justify the means when we are talking about a baby, life? How often have you heard people taking a stand for or against abortion? Both sides of the abortion coin are fiercely defensive of their opinion; justifying their position and rational. Taking a step back to look at both sides’ positions and rationales can help clarify and educate the opposing side. The more abortion is understood, the more one understands and accepts that abortion is anti-human, anti-life, and anti-woman.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 79: Adoption Miracles

According to Dictionary.com, the definition of a miracle is an effect or extraordinary event in the physical world that surpasses all known human or natural powers and is ascribed to a supernatural cause. such an effect or event manifesting or considered as a work of God.a wonder; marvel.a wonderful or surpassing example of some quality Working in the adoption world for almost 16 years and living in it for 47, I have seen miracles. Ones that I myself may not believe if I didn’t have the documentation or see it for myself. Sometimes miracles may not be miraculous for a person not involved in the miracle, but sometimes something so amazing happens, it is just too lifechanging to forget.

These are real stories of real people, to safeguard their privacy I will be removing and replacing any identifying information.

If you are facing an unplanned pregnancy and considering adoption, a licensed adoption agency is your best option. Local licensed adoption agencies can meet with you face to face, hold your hand when needed, and can remain with you throughout your pregnancy. In addition, you can visit your case worker after placement. Building Arizona Families is a licensed adoption agency that can walk with you every step of the way. We would love to hear from you to find out how we can help. You can call or text us 24/7 at: 623.695-4112.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption #78: Effects of Social Media on Adoption

It is important to be cautious when using social media because there may be some downfalls in incorporating social media and your adoption process, that could potentially open you up to both scams and criticism. There are many suggestions for adoptive families looking to connect with a birth mother; getting a Google Voice number, an answering/screening service or setting up a voice mail for someone to call if they have any questions or are thinking of placing their child for adoption. Another option is to include your adoption agency or attorney’s information so the potential birth mother can work directly with the adoption agency or attorney. One of the areas where adoptive families are exposed to adoption scams is through their adoption profile, accessible on a social media platform, whereas if an adoption profile is registered and on an adoption agency website, the interested party has little identifying information and has to go through the potential entity.

Social Media can be a great tool when used with safety and precautions and as an adoption resource.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode #77: Parenting An Adopted Child, Part 2

Depending on factors, variables, belief in parenting styles parenting a biological child in comparison to parenting an adopted child are not very different. The focus should be added into your parenting rather than taken out. Here are some examples and suggestions in a brief overview. Listen to the episode to hear in depth: When bringing an adopted newborn home, it is recommended to not overstimulate the baby.Remember the nature vs. nurture debate.Don’t alter or change your parenting style because you want to focus on the fact that your child was “adopted.” Alter or change your parenting style because it would be a better match with your child and your household.Try to let the “adopted” word go. Focus on your child, rather than on your “adopted” child.Try not to fall into the category of “well if he was my biological child….”Teach what a family is from the beginning focusing on things like: love, dedication, support, commitment rather than strictly on biology.Try to “normalize” adoption in your household.Stop talking about how “lucky” you or your adopted child is; or do it in the same way you would about a biological child.Be mindful of what you say and do. Teach your child how to celebrate differences and similarities. Parenting an adopted child should be viewed as adding in some extra layers to secure a solid parent-child relationship. The most important aspect of parenting an adopted child, in my opinion is to insure: unconditional love, unconditional acceptance, unconditional forgiveness, permanence and stability.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode#76: Parenting a Child Adopted at Birth

There are some variables that may impact and affect the way a parent “parents” a child: Gender of the childParental relationship with their own parents (adopted child’s grandparents) and the parenting they, themselves were reared inA parent’s own temperament, their level of educational, culture, socioeconomic status and the influence of their spouseA parent’s personal life experiences, their employment or lack of employment or maybe mistakes they have made or have been impacted bySocial Media, Outside Perceptions and previous experience There are so many similarities to parenting a biological child in comparison to parenting an adopted child. Here are five to start with: Parental love should be unconditionalChoose your core values FamilyRight vs. WrongRespectSelf-disciplineEmpathy/Compassion/ SympathyGenerosityConsistency is keyPracticing what you preachPrioritization Parenting an adopted child, does not need to be viewed as tricky, touchy or complicated. It should be viewed as adding in some extra layers to secure a solid parent-child relationship. The most important aspect of parenting an adopted child, in my opinion is to ensure: unconditional love, unconditional acceptance, unconditional forgiveness, permanence and stability.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption #75: Misunderstandings Surrounding Adoption

Birth Mothers love their babies and are making an adoption choice because they have chosen to put their babies before themselves.

Birth mothers may be facing factors that society may not realize: There may be little to zero support from friends or family members.Drug use and homelessness are very common reasons for an adoption choice.Birth mothers are very afraid of being judged for their adoption choice.Birth mothers may struggle during their adoption journey and its important to understand when: Attending an OBGYN appointmentExplaining their adoption choiceChoosing an adoptive familyMaking an adoption planReviewing adoption consent paperwork prior to labor and deliveryThe birth of their babyLeaving the hospital4.Saying goodbye to their baby birth mother may have been in foster care and has no family members in her life.This may be not be the first baby placed for adoption by this birth mother. Celebrating adoption as a choice for unplanned pregnancies is a positive way to show your support for our adoption community. Understanding adoption truths allows facts to surface and myths to dissolve. It takes a village to raise a child and a nation to support adoption.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption #74: Finding Peace in Uncharted Waters; Reaching the Acceptance Stage

To date all of us are surrounded by uncharted territory, learning to navigate and forage new paths, create a new lifestyle, then the one we were previously used to. Whether we considered ourselves happy, fulfilled, living a life of joy or even the life we wanted to be living, we were familiar with it, it was comfortable, routine, and few of us like change. COVID-19 has bought us almost nothing but change, fear and grief. This can in some instances parallel some situations in the adoption process for both the birth mother and/or the adoptive family. The Kübler-Ross model of grief teaches us that the 5 stages of grief entail the following: DenialAngerBargainingDepressionAcceptance For a Birth Mother: When a birth mother feels like her family and friends do not support her adoption choice.When a birth mother struggles with her adoption choice after placing her baby for adoption.When a birth mother feels like the adoptive family she chose is not following through with their agreed upon Post Adoption Communication Agreement. For an Adoptive Family: When a birth mother does not choose them to be the adoptive family for her baby.When a birth mother changes her mind causing a disruption in an adoption match between her and an adoptive family.When an adoptive family feels like a birth mother is not following through with their agreed upon Post Adoption Communication Agreement. Whether we are grieving over the Coronavirus Pandemic or an unfortunate adoption experience, grief is still grief. The stages of grief are vital to learning to live again and find the joy in life.

Birth Mother Matters #73: Naseem- A Birth Mother's Adoption Journey

Listen to the story of one brave women who choose adoption for her babies. She shares her selfless choice, her reasons behind her decisions, the struggles and her experience. She is one of our podcast listeneners who wanted to share her story from another state because she believes in the power of adoption, despite the heartbreaking choice of a mother. Choosing adoption meant choosing the best life for her daughters, despite the internal heartache for herself, making the decison out of a mother's love.

Choosing adoption means choosing an option with support, aftercare and access to financial resources. Adoption is a beautiful choice and one that is increasingly becoming a more popular choice. If you are pregnant and are considering adoption, we are a licensed, full-service, non-profit Arizona Adoption Agency. We believe in adoption aftercare services and have a program on site to provide continued support through the Donna K. Evans Foundation. You can contact us 24/7 at (623) 695-4112. You are not alone and we want to help, thank you for considering adoption, you are making an amazing choice. Call or Text: (623) 695-4112, Email: info@buildingarizonafamilies.com

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Podcast 72: Why do Birth Mothers’ Adoption Experiences Vary?

A question that many birth mothers have asked me before, during and after going through an adoption; is why do some birth mothers happy with their adoption choice, and others are not as happy afterwards. There are so many variables that may positively or negatively affect or impact their journey. Your level of understanding of the adoption processYour reason for choosing adoptionYour support structure or lack of oneIf you follow recommendations of your agencyYour ability and willingness to speak up if things are not going the way you want them to goExternal factors outside of an adoption agency or birth mother’s control may also impact her adoption experience If you are experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and considering adoption and want to learn more or explore your options, we are here for you. We are available 24/7 by phone or text at (623) 695-4112. We can make an immediate appointment with you to get started on creating an Arizona Adoption Plan or just give you more information.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption #71: Making a Hospital Plan During COVID-19

When its time for a birth mother to make an adoption plan with her adoption case worker, this moment is one where she is reminded about how her adoption choice is very real. Some birth mothers have stated that they haven’t really thought about how they would like their time in the hospital to look like. Prior to this pandemic, hospital plans looked very different than they do now. The hospital was the time where a birth mother was able to be able to make all of the decisions about who she wanted in the room with her during Labor & Delivery, where the baby would stay after delivery, how much contact she and her baby would have with the adoptive family during their hospital stay, what discharge would look like; would they be discharged at the same time and leave the hospital together or would they have separate discharge times. In this situation; looking at it from the outside; its hard to see any highs for a birth mother in regard to a hospital plan as there are so many lows. Often, what goes down, comes up; so lets examine where there are some positives; learn about the choices a birth mother stills has and how to look differently at the ones she doesn't.

If you are listening and you are dealing with an unplanned pregnancy and want more information about adoption, we are a local Arizona Adoption Agency. We are available 24/7 by phone or text at (623) 695-4112. We can make an immediate appointment with you to get started on creating an Arizona Adoption Plan or just give you more information.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption #70: Parenting During the Coronavirus Pandemic

Parenting is the best job in the world, but it doesn’t come without bad days, hurt feelings, and often time regrets over decisions parents have made. Right now, most states have a “Shelter in Place” or “Stay Home” order due to Covid-19. Most schools have closed, and so kids are at home, unable to go to friends houses or the mall or even the movies. For kids, depending on their age this is a difficult time; their lack of ability to have face to face social interaction, recess, sports, just the shear ability to leave their house is challenging. For parents who are furloughed or have begun working from home, having to adjust to new challenges of telecommuting is tough, but add in having your kiddos at home can add another layer. The cherry on the top is now you are having to help your child or at least monitor that they are completing their schoolwork.

April is Child Abuse Prevention and Awareness Month please remember this during COVID-19 and shelter-in-place orders. In the midst of this outbreak of COVID-19, many families may find themselves facing many of the risk factors for child abuse and neglect: parental stress, economic instability, food insecurity, lack of adequate child care, and lack of normal routines. Reach out for help if you need it, you are not alone. Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline is a 24-hour hotline with resources to aid in every child abuse situation. All calls are confidential. Call 1-800-4-A-CHILD (1-800-422-4453) for help

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption #69: Is Coronavirus Impacting Abortions Part 2

Each year, nearly 1 million women choose to end a pregnancy in the United States, and about one quarter of American women will use abortion services by 45 years of age. According to Guttmacher Institute, around 70,000 people seek abortion care in the U.S. every month.

The Guttmacher Institute bases this number off of national abortion data for 2017, and doesn’t even begin to reflect how people’s decision-making around abortion and pregnancy will be impacted by COVID-19. On Monday, 4/6/2020, representatives of over 30,000 physicians who practice according to the Hippocratic Oath, the American Association of Pro-Life Obstetricians and Gynecologists (AAPLOG), the American College of Pediatricians, Christian Medical & Dental Associations, the Catholic Medical Association, and the Association of American Physicians & Surgeons, released a statement to end elective abortions during the Coronavirus emergency.

Remember, there are alternatives to abortion, and if you are dealing with an unplanned pregnancy and want more information about adoption, we are a local Arizona Adoption Agency. We are available 24/7 by phone or text at (623) 695-4112. We can make an immediate appointment with you to get started on creating an Arizona Adoption Plan or give you more information. Be educated about your unplanned pregnancy choice and alternatives to abortion in Arizona; your baby is counting on you! With adoption, you are never alone, choose life. #youbeforeme

www.ube4me.life

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption #68: How is the Coronavirus Impacting Abortions www.birthmothermatterspodcast.com

Looking strictly at numbers at the Covid-19 global pandemic: (These numbers were as of 4/12/2020)

To date: total Approximate Global Deaths attributed to or resulting from Covid-19 is: 114,215

To date: total Approximate United States Deaths attributed to or resulting from Covid-19 is: 22,071

Five states—Texas, Ohio, Alabama, Iowa, and Mississippi—have attempted to prohibit nonessential medical procedures during the novel coronavirus health crisis have included abortion among these nonessential procedures.

Remember, there are alternatives to abortion, and if you are dealing with an unplanned pregnancy and want more information about adoption, we are a local Arizona Adoption Agency. We are available 24/7 by phone or text at (623) 695-4112. We can make an immediate appointment with you to get started on creating an Arizona Adoption Plan or give you more information. Be educated about your unplanned pregnancy choice and alternatives to abortion in Arizona; your baby is counting on you!

With adoption, you are never alone, choose life. #youbeforeme

www.ube4me.life

This podcast is dedicated to understanding how (at this present moment) Covid-19 (Coronavirus) is affecting and impacting our Domestic Adoption Program. We can only speak on behalf of our Adoption Agency - Building Arizona Families, located in the State of Arizona. Listen and learn how one agency in the middle of a pandemic is able to continue its mission to build families, assist women in placing their baby for adoption and provide light in a season of darkeness.

How will COVID-19 impact domestic adoptions? Let's jump right into these questions, please understand that we are solely speaking on behalf of Building Arizona Families Adoption Agency and AZ Pregnancy Help; located in Arizona. We cannot speak for how other agencies are handling adoptions or what their state regulations and guidelines are regarding COVID-19. We can however go into detail about how we handling adoption and the precautions we are taking.

There are alternatives to abortion, and if you are dealing with an unplanned pregnancy and want more information about adoption, we are a local Arizona Adoption Agency. We are available 24/7 by phone or text at (623) 695-4112. We can make an immediate appointment with you to get started on creating an Arizona Adoption Plan or give you more information. Be educated about your unplanned pregnancy choice and alternatives to abortion in Arizona; your baby is counting on you!

Building Arizona Families

(623) 936-4729

www.BuildingArizonaFamilies.com

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 66: Covid-19 and Adoption; Coronavirus

This podcast is dedicated to understanding how (at this present moment) Covid-19 (Coronoavirus) is affecting and impacting our Domestic Adoption Program. We can only speak on behalf of our Adoption Agency - Building Arizona Families, located in the State of Arizona. Listen and learn how one agency in the middle of a pandemic is able to continue its mission to build families, assist women in placing their baby for adoption and provide light in a season of darkeness.

How will COVID-19 impact domestic adoptions? Let's jump right into these questions, please understand that we are solely speaking on behalf of Building Arizona Families Adoption Agency and AZ Pregnancy Help; located in Arizona. We cannot speak for how other agencies are handling adoptions or what their state regulations and guidelines are regarding COVID-19. We can however go into detail about how we handling adoption and the precautions we are taking.

There are alternatives to abortion, and if you are dealing with an unplanned pregnancy and want more information about adoption, we are a local Arizona Adoption Agency. We are available 24/7 by phone or text at (623) 695-4112. We can make an immediate appointment with you to get started on creating an Arizona Adoption Plan or give you more information. Be educated about your unplanned pregnancy choice and alternatives to abortion in Arizona; your baby is counting on you!

Building Arizona Families

(623) 936-4729

www.BuildingArizonaFamilies.com

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 65: The Posiitive Impact of Adoption

In the past twenty years, there have been lots of changes in the adoption world. International adoptions became more and more common and often times international adoptive families are not camouflaged, and additionally celebrities, in my opinion have really helped with this aspect. People look to celebrities and often want to emulate them, and adopting publicly, appears to have assist in the normalization of adoption. Adoption is more commonly spoke about, integrated into movies, television shows, books, plays, and all around media. Now that adoption has become more of a common topic, child adoptees may not feel different than their peers, they may not feel like the odd man out.

In this podcast, I want to address some common questions people ask. I want to try to answer on my own behalf, but I suspect there is some commonality among adult adoptees. How does it feel to be adopted?Do you feel lucky that you were adopted?Why haven’t you adopted?Are you angry at your birth mother for placing you for adoption?Was your adoptive family upset when you wanted to find your birth mother?Are your adoptive family and biological family similar?Which of the two families can you relate to more? If you are pregnant and you are facing an unplanned pregnancy and want more information about adoption, we are a local Arizona Adoption Agency, all of the information provided in this blog regarding birth mothers services are offered by our agency as we cannot speak for another agency and what they may or may not offer. We are available 24/7 by phone or text at (623) 695-4112.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 64: Adoption Match Coordinator Part 2

Listen to Part 2, leanr about the adoption match process between a birth mother / birth parents and an adoptive family. Continuing listening to our very own adoption match coordinator discuss all aspects of matching an adoptive family with a birth mother. Listen to her personal adoption experience and what it is to work in the adoption fleild after adopting! Robyn discusses everything from adoption profile books to adoption preferences. Learn all about matching with a birth mother! Everything you have ever wanted to know and more!

If you are listening and you are dealing with an unplanned pregnancy and want more information about adoption, we are a local Arizona Adoption Agency. We are available 24/7 by phone or text at (623) 695-4112. We can make an immediate appointment with you to get started on creating an Arizona Adoption Plan or just give you more information.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 63: Adoption Match Coordinator Part 1

Listen to our very own adoption match coordinator discuss all aspects of matching an adoptive family with a birth mother. Listen to her personal adoption experience and what it is to work in the adoption fleild after adopting! Robyn discusses everything from adoption profile books to adoption preferences. Learn all about matching with a birth mother!

If you are listening and you are dealing with an unplanned pregnancy and want more information about adoption, we are a local Arizona Adoption Agency. We are available 24/7 by phone or text at (623) 695-4112. We can make an immediate appointment with you to get started on creating an Arizona Adoption Plan or just give you more information.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 62: Maintaining Contact With A Birth Mother

Open adoption often begins with promises and commitments on behalf of the birth mother and adoptive parents. Open adoption often begins with promises and commitments on behalf of the birth mother and adoptive parents. When a Post Adoption Communication Agreement is entered into the Adoption Court Records, and the state in which the adoption is finalized has laws making the Post Adoption Communication Agreements legally enforceable.

This can cause confusion and feelings of loss on behalf of the adoptive family, who may have genuienly wanted to have a close relationship with the birth mother of their child. Dreams and promises may have been made to stay in close contact and have get togethers, phone calls and email exchanges. This may cause concern over what they will tell their adopted child when he or she grows older and asks about their birth mother. Open adoption holds so many positive aspects in an open adoptive relationship and when an adoptive family really wants an open relationship it can be devastating when the adoption is finalized, and the birth mother drifts away. When hen a birth mother has stopped responding to emails, phone calls and has not returned any contact, an adoptive family may wonder why, what happened and wonder what happened.

Listen to this podcast to learn more but remember, “Rivers know this: there is no hurry. We shall get there some day.” A. A. Milne

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 61 :Pregnant & Homeless

The feelings and concerns you are experiencing are completely normal and common. Being homeless can feel lonely, but we can help. If you are pregnant and considering giving a baby up for adoption in Arizona, please understand that there are options. Adoption does not cost you as the birth mother anything. If you are homeless, we can help you with housing, food, clothing, a cell phone, transportation, and so much more. We have an after-care program designed to assist women who have privately placed a baby for adoption with resources and continued assistance.

Many of our clients were homeless when they came into our adoption program. They made a loving adoption choice. Their adoption choice was the beginning of a new life for both them and their baby. Find out more information about unplanned pregnancy options in Arizona.

If you are pregnant and considering giving a baby up for adoption in Arizona, we are a licensed, full-service, non-profit Arizona adoption agency. We believe in adoption aftercare services and have a program on-site to provide continued support through the Donna K. Evans Foundation. You can contact us 24/7 at (623) 695-4112. You are not alone, and we want to help. Thank you for considering adoption, it can change your life and your baby’s life in wonderful ways!

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 60: Adoption Agencies Are A Safe Place

Being homeless can be incredibly difficult and being homeless and pregnant is even more difficult. Adoption is an option you and your baby. Financial instability is one of the number one reasons women choose adoption over parenting. Finding yourself pregnant and sleeping in a shelter, at a park, or under a bridge can be overwhelming. You may be experiencing of feelings, such as: Disappointed that you are not in a different place in your life in order to provide for yourself and your babyScared of what will happen to you and your baby.Concerned about how you will be able to eat healthy food Sad that your life is not what you dreamed it would beWorried about how to attend prenatal doctor appointmentsStaying warm and clothed during your pregnancyStressed out about what people think about you being pregnant and homeless These feelings and concerns are normal and common. Being homeless can feel lonely, but we can help. If you are pregnant and considering giving a baby up for adoption in Arizona, please understand that there are options. Adoption does not cost you as the birth mother anything. If you are homeless, we can help you with housing, food, clothing, a cell phone, transportation, and so much more. We have an after-care program designed to assist women who have privately placed a baby for adoption with resources and continued assistance.

Many of our clients were homeless when they came into our adoption program. Their adoption choice was the beginning of a new life for both them and their baby. If you are pregnant and considering giving a baby up for adoption in Arizona, we are a licensed, full-service, non-profit Arizona adoption agency. You can contact us 24/7 at (623) 695-4112.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Ep.59: Adoption & Abortion in the News Part 2

A parent may lose the right to object to the adoption of a child by failing, without justifiable cause, to make child-support payments “as required by law or judicial decree,” the Ohio Supreme Court ruled Feb. 26.

Southwest Airlines made a beautiful tribute to a couple who adopted a new baby and was traveling home from Colorado to California. They invited the all the paaengers to particpate by writting notes to the new adoptive couple on southwest napkins.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 58: Adoption & Abortion in the News Part 1

Adoption is a beautiful choice for women experiencing unplanned pregnancy. Many states are taking proactive legislative measures that protects the life of the unborn. Three states have taken serious measure in protecting unborn babies: Ohio, Utah and Mississippi. When a state takes proactive measures to change abortion law, two things happen; the potential to protect lives of newborns occurs and landmarks are set that may affect and impact other state legislatures.

Adoption does not garner as much attention in the news as abortion because it is not considered a “controversial” topic or a point focus of political debates. Adoption is a respectable choice and one that a woman can be proud of, one that promotes the life of the unborn and values human life.

Remember, there are alternatives to abortion, and if you are dealing with an unplanned pregnancy and want more information about adoption, we are a local Arizona Adoption Agency. We are available 24/7 by phone or text at (623) 695-4112. We can make an immediate appointment with you to get started on creating an Arizona Adoption Plan or give you more information. Be educated about your unplanned pregnancy choice and alternatives to abortion in Arizona; your baby is counting on you!

With adoption, you are never alone, choose life. #youbeforeme

www.ube4me.life

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 57: Adoption Case Manager Interview

One of our own opens up and takls about what it is really like being an adoption case manager. Sarah is a case worker who has an extensive social worker background and her perspective on working in the adiotion field is both educational and inspiring.

Sarah is an adoptive family case worker who has worked in many different fields of social work from Juvenile probation to mental health. Sarah was born and raised in Montana before heading south to Arizona in 2018. Building Arizona Families’ mission statement drew her out of retirement and back into working as a social worker for the agency. Sarah graduated from Carroll College in Helena, Montana with a degree in social work and criminal justice. Adoption is a specialized field in the social work sector, so many people who join our growing community do not know the intricacies that adoption holds. Adoption is like its own island in a sense, we have our own language, acronyms, our own philosophies and yet we all follow and adhere to the same adoption laws; both state and federal.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 56: The Hardest Time For a Birth Mother

For one woman the most difficult time may be walking through the door of the adoption agency, having made the choice to place her baby for adoption. For another it may be choosing the adoptive family, worrying that she won’t choose the right one. Another may really struggle with telling friends, family members and co-workers about her adoption choice. Another may struggle with an ongoing battle in her head regarding how she is in a place in her life where adoption is the best choice for her and her baby.

A common thread is leaving the hospital and saying good bye to their baby. They have already experienced the trauma of labor and delivery, (yes trauma.) And then choosing how much time to spend with their baby and then saying goodbye to their baby can be another traumatic moment.

Because saying goodbye at the hospital is one of the hardest aspects of adoption, even comprehending it hurts. We can dive a little deeper. When a birth mother chooses open adoption, if they have a good relationship spending time together at the hospital helps in many aspects. Seeing the adoptive family with the baby helps some, it may bring peace in the future to know that your baby will be well taken care of and loved to the moon and back.

When discharge happens, I have seen many a birth mother want to leave asap. Sometimes Birth mother and baby leave at the same time.. As I have stated before, is very important for any birth mother to not leave empty-handed, so a vase of flowers or a teddy bear needs to be given to her so she can hold something as she leaves.

I always remind birth mothers, in open adoption, it is not good-bye, it is see you later.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 55: Choosing The Right Adoption Agency

When choosing an adoption agency, as a birth mother some important aspects to consider are the following: Is the agency local? Will I meet with an agency representative face to face to make an adoption plan?Does the agency have an office or will we meet in public locations to talk about placing baby for adoption?How long has the agency been in practice? Are they experienced in handling adoptions?Will I have my own case manager or will I share one with the adoptive parents?Are after care services available? Are they easily accessible?Can the agency provide references from previous clients?How quickly can I make an appointment?Are case managers available 24/7 in case of an emergency?What services will be provided during my pregnancy? Will I receive financial help for pregnancy adoption?Do they offer both open and closed adoptions?Do they have adoptive families living in-state and out-of-state for me to choose from when they help me find family for my baby?How do they handle communication after placement? As a Co-Founder and Director of Building Arizona Families and AZ Pregnancy Help, I believe our agency meets and exceeds expectations of birth mothers. We believe in women and their right to choose the type of adoption journey that is best for them and their unborn baby. We understand the sacred trust between a birth mother and her adoption agency.

Rest assured that we answer all of these questions.

Building Arizona Families is a licensed adoption agency. We would love to hear from you to find out how we can help. You can call or text us 24/7 at 623.695-4112.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 54: Volunteers Matter- Please Volunteer

The Donna K. Evans Foundation has a mission of helping women after placing a baby for private adoption. Our goal is to provide women a safe place to return for help to reach their own life goals and dreams after private placement of their baby for adoption. Any woman who has placed a baby for adoption, regardless of the agency used for their adoption may utilize our services, at any time after the adoptive placement.

Often times people have the heart to volunteer, the desire to make a difference, and the time to donate but they don’t know where to volunteer, who to call and how to begin. I will tell you how you can help. We need you! This is how you can volunteer for the Donna K. Evans Foundation:

Call or Email Maura Celaya, DKE’s Volunteer Coordinator. Her contact information is: maura@dkefoundation.comOffice: (602) 595-8592 We have all kinds of volunteer opportunities at the Donna K. Evans Foundation, some include: Teaching a 60-90 minute one time class to our clientsHelping Recruit DonationsAssisting with Scheduling ClassesMailing FliersDistributing LiteratureVolunteering your Professional Service: Legal Aide, Counseling, Financial ManagementAnd so much more!!! If you can’t volunteer and would like to make a difference, we need the following are donations and can be purchased/shipped directly to theDKE office for your convenience:

DKE Foundation 8433 N. Black Canyon Highway Building 6, Suite 158, Phoenix, AZ 85021

Thank you.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 53: Is It Difficult For Families to Adopt?

There are lots of reasons that the perception or notion that adopting is difficult may exist.

Some of these reasons may include:Someone may have had a difficult time adopting and that situation is openly discussed more so than the positive situations that have occurred.
There may lots and lots of reasons people believe that adopting is difficult, but that does not mean it is true.

3. The adoption process seems long and overwhelming.

Building Arizona Families / AZ Pregnancy Help is a local adoption agency. If you would like to create an Arizona adoption plan, please contact us at (623) 695-4112. If you are considering placing baby for adoption and want to find a family for you baby in Arizona or anywhere in the United states, we can help. Please remember, there are alternative to abortion and we offer free unplanned pregnancy help. We also offer financial help for pregnancy when choosing adoption.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 52: Red Flags in Adoption Explained

When a birth mother comes into an adoption agency with the intent of placing her baby for adoption, it is important to understand her reasons for choosing adoption. “Red flags” is a term that we use to assess a birth mother’s probability of placing her baby for adoption (to the best of our ability (we don’t have a crystal ball.) Counseling will assist her in processing her thoughts and feelings. Red flags always need to be evaluated in context and all factors need to be considered before confirmation is stated. Additionally, red flags do not necessarily mean that the adoption won’t happen, they mean that further investigation is warranted.

Often times during the adoption process, situations will arise where the agency or adoptive family will become concerned and when a situation like this arises; as an agency we staff (get together as a team and discuss) it. What is important to remember is one identifiable red flag exhibited by a birth mother may not have the same impact or warrant the same concern in another. Every behavior is relative, its important to remember that you have to look at the birth mother and her situation as a whole entity not just a potential concern. Never attending doctor appointmentsAlways asking about the financial assistance, making this the focus of every conversationPostponing choosing an adoptive familyAvoiding contact with the adoptive family, even after stating that she wanted an open adoption.She is in a committed relationship and is pregnant by the father of all of their other children who live in the home together.

Birth Mother Matters Adoption 51: Why Using an Agency for Adoption is Important

In an independent adoption, adoptive parents work directly with an adoption attorneyto complete an adoption without the use of an agency. An adoption agency is a one-stop shop, while independent adoptions require adoptive parents to “outsource” the services they need from multiple adoption professionals. Some services may be more difficult to obtain in an independent adoption.

Families may attempt to do an “Independent Adoption” for the following reasons: To attempt to save moneyTo maintain controlTo establish more direct communication The differences, downsides, associated risks, liabilities when you try to navigate domestic adoption on your own may include: If an adoptive family needs to focate a pregnant woman considering adoption using their own resource.Adoption agencies usually work closely with prospective birth mothers to evaluate their commitment level throughout the adoption process. The services offered by an agency may not be comparable to what you can offer as an Independent; group counseling, aftercare program, access to a specialized adoption counselor, continuity of care in future adoptions.Costs vary widely depending on many independent factors and money is then a direct conversation between the birth mother and adoptive family. Adoption agencies assist the birth mother in creating her hospital plan. Navigating the hospital stay and organizing medical expenses and insurance may be challenging for adoptive parents in an independent adoption.

Birth Mother Matters Adoption 50: What Agencies Want Adoptive Families to Know

As a professional in the adoption community who has assisted in creating families for over 15 years, I feel comfortable speaking on behalf of individuals in the adoption profession.

So here it is; the good, the bad and the ugly, no holds barred, nothing off limits, no secrets kept. We want to the adoption to be as successful as you. We are working behind the scenes to make sure that we are doing everything we can to make the adoption occur. We are crossing our fingers and holding our breath right alongside you. There are moments where we can’t breath either and yes, we are holding back tears too.Sometimes you can come across entitled, maybe you have no idea of this and you would never want to come accross that way.We are just as protective of you! When the birth mother has concerns or questions about you, we make sure we discuss everything positive and reassuring. We understand how important it is for a birth mother to go to her prenatal appointments and yes we really try to make them happen. When we have to deliver bad news, like a birth mother has changed her mind, she miscarried or the baby passed away- we dread delivering that news in a way that is indescribable. Its rare, but when a baby has to be returned to the baby’s birth mother, we as a staff, morn. We love to celebrate with you! We really want you to be kind and respectful to the hospital staff, we work with them a lot. When you get to go home with your baby, we are cheering you every minute of the way. We do everything we can to expedite you getting to go home. We want you to begin your new beautiful life.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption #49: What Do Birth Mothers Fear About Adoption?

These are 10 of the most common fears: People will think I am a terrible person, a bad mom and they will never look at me the same.What if no one wants my baby?What if the adoptive parents don’t follow through on our open adoption plan?What if I change my mind?What will I tell people when they ask about my pregnancy?Will the OBGYN Office judge me?How will I know if I choose the “right” adoptive family?What if I have used drugs during my pregnancy- will the adoptive family still want my baby?What if the father of my baby changes his mind and wants the baby?I will be alone after the baby is placed for adoption. Choosing adoption means choosing an option with support, aftercare and access to financial resources. Adoption is a beautiful choice and one that is increasingly becoming a more popular choice. If you are pregnant and are considering adoption, we are a licensed, full-service, non-profit Arizona Adoption Agency. We believe in adoption aftercare services and have a program on site to provide continued support through the Donna K. Evans Foundation. You can contact us 24/7 at (623) 695-4112. You are not alone and we want to help, thank you for considering adoption, you are making an amazing choice.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption #48: Adoption in the Media & News

Adoption continues to make the news in all media forms and fashions. Taking a look at current issues with regards to adoption, bring us to the following topics:

The Maricopa County Board of Supervisors officially accepted Petersen's resignation on Jan. 8, 2020. Governor Andrew M. Cuomo today announced that more than 3,600 adoptees, outside of New York City, aged 18 or older have filed applications since January 15, 2020 to receive a certified copy of their original, or pre-adoption, birth certificate. In March 2020, the Supreme Court will rule on the constitutionality of Louisiana’s new abortion law, which requires that physicians doing abortions have admitting privileges at a hospital within 30 miles of the clinic.

Tax benefits for adoption include both a tax credit for qualified adoption expenses paid to adopt an eligible child and an exclusion from income for employer-provided adoption assistance.

Choosing adoption means choosing an option with support, aftercare and access to financial resources. Adoption is a beautiful choice and one that is increasingly becoming a more popular choice. If you are pregnant and are considering adoption, we are a licensed, full-service, non-profit Arizona Adoption Agency. We believe in adoption aftercare services and have a program on site to provide continued support through the Donna K. Evans Foundation. You can contact us 24/7 at (623) 695-4112. You are not alone and we want to help, thank you for considering adoption, you are making an amazing choice.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption #47: What Can Make Adoption Difficult, Part Two:Adoptive Families

There are lots of reasons that the perception or notion that adopting is difficult may exist. Some of these reasons may include: Someone may have had a difficult time adopting and that situation is openly discussed more so than the positive situations that have occurred.There may lots and lots of reasons people believe that adopting is difficult, but that does not mean it is true.The adoption process seems long and overwhelming. There are so many steps; completing a home study, creating an adoption profile book, choosing an adoption agency, and then being matched with a birth mother, waiting for adoption papers to be signed, then waiting for the adoption finalization. Some aspects that may appear to give credence to the notion that adoption is difficult, however we will counterbalance these aspects.Just like any other process, education is paramount. Learn everything you can about adoption before beginning. Doing your own research will help increase your confidence in your adoption choices. Your confidence level will greatly impact your level of happiness throughout the duration of your journey. Don’t forget to stop and smell the roses!

Choosing adoption means choosing an option with support, aftercare and access to financial resources. Adoption is a beautiful choice and one that is increasingly becoming a more popular choice. If you are pregnant and are considering adoption, we are a licensed, full-service, non-profit Arizona Adoption Agency. You can contact us 24/7 at (623) 695-4112. You are not alone and we want to help, thank you for considering adoption, you are making an amazing choice.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption #46: What Can Make Adoption Seem Difficult From a Birth Mother's Perspective- Part One

(Disclosure: We can only speak on behalf of our adoption agency, Building Arizona Families, as state and agency law and policies may differ.) We will be answering questions like: “If I call an agency does that mean I am committed to doing an adoption?”“Are there fees I have to pay?"“What if I have other children?”“Who picks the adoptive family for my baby?”“Are these families background-checked?”“When do I sign the final paperwork?”“What if I have placed a child for adoption before?”“Can I choose what type of adoption I would like and how much contact I want with the adoptive family?”“Can the father of my baby be involved in the adoption process?”“Will I be able to receive financial assistance with my living expenses during my pregnancy?” Choosing adoption means choosing an option with support, aftercare and access to financial resources. Adoption is a beautiful choice and one that is increasingly becoming a more popular choice. If you are pregnant and are considering adoption, we are a licensed, full-service, non-profit Arizona Adoption Agency. We believe in adoption aftercare services and have a program on site to provide continued support through the Donna K. Evans Foundation. You can contact us 24/7 at (623) 695-4112. You are not alone and we want to help, thank you for considering adoption, you are making an amazing choice.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption #45: Love & Loss in Adopt Reunification Part 2

I met my biological mother in 2007. I spent about 6 months prior to our reunification; filing a court petition to open my closed adoption, to be able to retrieve my adoption records in the hopes of finding my biological mother. During this process, I learned that there are always highs and lows; things you find out that you never knew.

Upon receiving my original birth certificate, I learned that my biological mother had not named me; so I was listed as “Baby Girl Evans.” Additionally, no birth father was named. My birth mothers name was on the birth certificate but it still took me a few weeks to find her; I learned she has been married and divorced multiple times which meant her name kept changing. Little did I know that she was living in the same neighborhood she lived in when she was pregnant with me; she wanted to make it easier for me to find her. All along I was thinking; do we have the right person, what if…what if….?

Emotions experienced included: GuiltExcitementConfusionCuriosity Uncertainty Shock Denial What I have learned: Its okay to do things in your own time.Don’t let others make you feel guilty; they haven’t walked your life journey (guy in airport condemned me for not telling my adoptive parents.)Learning your biological history doesn’t change the person you are, it only adds more layersAllow everyone to reach the acceptance stage in their own timeSome months you may have more contact than others and that’s okay and that doesn’t mean you aren’t as close or that something is wrong

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode #44: Love & Loss in Adopt Reunification Part One

Believe it or not, I am an incredibly private person with what has become more and more a public persona. This transition for me is still new and at times still takes my breath away. I am beyond grateful to answer questions, share my story and open the door into the adoption world as well as into my own adoption backyard. Sometimes its easier to stay on the surface when talking about adoption rather than diving deep. I ask others who I speak with to dig deep, aim for the roots and I believe it is time for me to do the same. Some of what we will be discussing today we have touched on before; the logistics, the events and thoughts and feelings- but today we will hold no punches and spare no emotions.

During this process there are always highs and lows; things you find out that you never knew. Facts that may not have been important to someone else but life-changing for you.

What I have learned and continue to learn as I walk through my own adoption journey: Its okay to do things in your own time.Don’t let others make you feel guilty; they haven’t walked your life journey (guy in airport condemned me for not telling my adoptive parents.)Learning your biological history doesn’t change the person you are, it only adds more layersAllow everyone to reach the acceptance stage in their own timeSome months you may have more contact than others and that’s okay and that doesn’t mean you aren’t as close or that something is wrong. Whether you are adopted, adopt, or place a child for adoption, your journey does not end when the adoption is finalized, in fact your journey is just beginning.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 43: Working in the Adoption Field

So often, everyone from family members, friends, clients, strangers or really anyone who catches wind that I work in the adoption field seems to be really curious as to what it is really like to work in the adoption world.

My favorite- go-to answer is “It’s the best and worst job you will ever have.”

When an adoption case worker spends a significant amount of time with her birth mother client; often times a relationship on both sides develops. The adoption caseworker has to maintain appropriate boundaries and be able to disconnect emotionally when decisions have to be made. There is a fine line where you have to remain professional and yet personable. In some instances, a case worker can become a significant person in a birth mother’s life; she may have come to the agency alone and the emotional support of a caseworker is imperative to her well being. A birth mother may be going throw an incredibly difficult time in her life during her adoption journey and she bonds and attaches to her case worker. In this situation, I have seen where a birth mother has a more difficult time saying “see you later” to the case worker than her newborn. This is where an aftercare program is crucial to maintain a relationship with the adoption entity and provide the ability for a continued relationship with another avenue rather than becoming pregnant again. Adoption case workers are human too, and have chosen the social service field for a reason; they too can become attached. The longer you are in the adoption service field, the more you are able to prepare yourself, maintain boundaries and learn how to make the decisions that are in the best interest of your client, even when it is difficult.

Pregnant and intersted in adoption? Call 623-695-4112.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 42: Birth Father Roles & Their Impact

Many times birth fathers and birth mothers have broken up and are not longer together and without his support; emotional, physical, financial and mental- a birth mother decides adoption is in the best interest of both her and her unborn baby. The birth mother may have realized that her relationship is incredibly unstable and wants stability and longevity for her child.

Other times, birth mothers may continue to be in a relationship with their unborn baby’s birth father and he is not in support of her adoption plan. He will argue with her about her plan, and she sticks to her plan and they will break up and get back together and the focus becomes on him rather than her adoption plan. In her mind, she has made her decision and her knees are locked. This situation is very difficult on a birth mother and one way to assist her is to build up her support system.

Sometimes a birth mother has multiple potential birth fathers. They may have broken up and gotten back together and they don’t know which one is the actual birth father. Other times there are situations where all of the birth fathers are very cooperative.

Sometimes, in the best case scenarios; the birth father is very supportive of the birth mother, regardless of whether or not they are in a current relationship. He attends all of the adoption meetings, helps choose the adoptive family, meets with them and develops his own relationship with them. This situation is so positive for the birth mother, it not only establishes a support structure but gives her further assurance in her adoption choice.

Adoption is a beautiful choice and studies have shown us that birth fathers can be a very valuable asset in their support of an adoption plan.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 41: Abortion Education Part 2 Title X

The "rule" requires "financial and physical separation" between facilities or programs that provide any kind of health service using Title X funds and those that provide abortions. It also prohibits referrals for abortion as a method of “family planning." The rule does state that providers are allowed to give abortion referrals in cases of medical emergencies.

We must acknowledge that Title X only takes abortion out of the umbrella of family planning.

This so-called "gag" rule leaves Title X facilities that provide abortions as well as other health services in aquandry: Either they stop receiving the Title X Funding or they stop providing information and services related to abortion. This rule really just compartmentalizes what the Title X Funding is and what is has been designated for; which broad array of services that fall under the umbrella of family planning: contraceptive services, supplies, and information; breast and cervical cancer screenings; and STD prevention, testing, and treatment.

If you are ready to begin your adoption plan or just want to learn more about adoption- The best thing to do is to call our 24hour/7 day a week phone number at 623-695-4112 or our toll-free number, 1-800-340-9665. We will answer any additional questions you may have and then schedule an appointment with one of our case workers. We can provide transportation to our office located off the I-17 Access Road and Northern, where we can begin assisting you with your adoption plan.

Building Arizona Families, AZ Pregnancy Help, The Donna K. Evans Foundation and the #YouBeforeMe Campaign care about adoption and want to spread the word.

Abortion News: The cost of an abortion in the state of Arizona appears to range from $560 to $2500, depending ont he provider, type of abortion and how far along you are in your pregnancy.States are not required to submit abortion data to the CDC, but the overwhelming majority do.The Planned Parenthood annual report, covering the 2017-2018 fiscal year, was published over the weekend of Jan. 19-20.The number of abortions performed by Planned Parenthood rose to 332,757, an increase of over three percent. Adoption referrals dropped by over 25 percent to 2,831. The abortion provider makes one adoption referral for every 117 abortions, according to their own data.37 states require parental involvement in a minor’s decision to have an abortion.Abortion medication to be available at California’s college health centers under new law. A 2018 study published in the Journal of Adolescent Health estimated that 322 to 519 students at California’s public universities seek medical abortions each month. If you are ready to begin your adoption plan or just want to learn more about adoption- The best thing to do is to call our 24hour/7 day a week phone number at 623-695-4112 or our toll-free number, 1-800-340-9665. We will answer any additional questions you may have and then schedule an appointment with one of our case workers. We can provide transportation to our office located off the I-17 Access Road and Northern, where we can begin assisting you with your adoption plan. Building Arizona Families is the adoption agency that cares about you and your bab.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 39: Understanding Their Choice 1 & 2

This is an intimate interview of a birth mother and birth father as they explain why they chose adoption for their unborn baby. They candidly discuss their lives and life choices that led them to their adoption path. Their lives are relatable to so many others and listenting to their story will not only answer questions you may have but educate you what life is really like in their shoes. Dealing with life on the streets to incarceration to drug use to gang involvement is dicusssed openly and honestly.

For privacy purposes, the names of the individuals we interviewed are not listed or mentioned.

Here, at Building Arizona Families Adoption Agency, we believe in emotional, financial, mental, and physical assistance for our clients during the adoption process. Our agency is unique in that we have a food pantry and a maternity closet accessible to our clients. We also assist our clients with locating and using state resources that are accessible to them. We understand all aspects of adoption as we have staff members who were adopted, have adopted, and have placed a child for adoption. We understand what it means to need financial help and the emotions that go along with placing a child for adoption you are not alone. We are here to help you. (623) 695-4112. Make the call today.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 38: Understanding Their Choice Part 2

This podcast is the second half of s an intimate interview of a birth mother and birth father as they explain why they chose adoption for their unborn baby. They candidly discss their lives and life choices that led them to their adoption path. Their lives are relatable to so many others and listenting to their story will not only answer questions you may have but educate you what life is really like in their shoes. Dealing with life on the streets to incarceration to drug use to gang involvement is dicusssed openly and honestly.

For privacy purposes, the names of the individuals we interviewed are not listed or mentioned.

Here, at Building Arizona Families Adoption Agency, we believe in emotional, financial, mental, and physical assistance for our clients during the adoption process. Our agency is unique in that we have a food pantry and a maternity closet accessible to our clients. We also assist our clients with locating and using state resources that are accessible to them. We understand all aspects of adoption as we have staff members who were adopted, have adopted, and have placed a child for adoption. We understand what it means to need financial help and the emotions that go along with placing a child for adoption you are not alone. We are here to help you. (623) 695-4112. Make the call today.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 37: Understanding Their Choice Part 1

This podcast features an intimate interview of a birth mother and birth father as they explain why they chose adoption for their unborn baby. They candidly dicsuss their lives and life choices that led them to their adoption path. Their lives are relatable to so many others and listenting to their story will not only answer questions you may have but educate you what life is really like in their shoes. Dealing with life on the streets to incarceration to drug use to gang involvement is dicusssed openly and honestly.

For privacy purposes, the names of the individuals we interviewed are not listed or mentioned.

Here, at Building Arizona Families Adoption Agency, we believe in emotional, financial, mental, and physical assistance for our clients during the adoption process. Our agency is unique in that we have a food pantry and a maternity closet accessible to our clients. We also assist our clients with locating and using state resources that are accessible to them. We understand all aspects of adoption as we have staff members who were adopted, have adopted, and have placed a child for adoption. We understand what it means to need financial help and the emotions that go along with placing a child for adoptiony ou are not alone. We are here to help you. (623) 695-4112. Make the call today.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 36: The Christmas Podcast

For Adoptees: Include your adopted child in family traditionsHelp your child create memorial keepsakesRemember that all families are differentMake your own family advent calendar For Birth Parents:

The first year may be the hardest, as “firsts” usually are. It can be normal for birthmothers to struggle with their child’s absence over the holidays. Especially those who have recently placed. Here are some things that may help: Reach out to your childIf it’s possible, make arrangements in advance to spend time with your child.Send a gift or cardAsk the adoptive parents for a photoKeep a journalConnect with other birthmothersReach out to a counselor For Adoptive Parents:

If you are in the adoption process; wanting & waiting to adopt: Trying not to focus all of your energy on adoptingTaking an adoption “time vacation”Counting your blessings; focus on the positives Get support from other adoptive parents If you have adopted and you have an open adoption with your child’s birth parents:

Mail thir birth parents a handmade gift Extend an invitation to participateSchedule a time to Skype or FaceTimeRecord a Holiday MessageEncourage your child to create a special message for their birth parentsPlan a Visit Merry Christmas from us to you, and thank you for listening. We have some very exciting episodes scheduled and are so grateful for our listeners!

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 35: A Birth Mother's Heart

Adoption choices are difficult, there is no other way to explain this. Choosing to carry a baby for nine months and place that baby with another family may seem unimaginable. However, to that pregnant woman, she has stories, secrets and dreams that people may not be aware of. She may not be in the same financial position, in a safe relationship, have family support or even available resources. She may not have a place to call “home”, know where her next meal is coming from, or have the ability to even seek medical care for herself. An adoption choice is a deeply personal one and should remain a personal one, it’s an incredibly respectable choice that a woman has had since the biblical times. A woman who has chosen adoption has chosen life, but is selflessly choosing to allow another to parent.

Grief is not something that only occurs after a baby is placed for adoption, but actually begins the moment an adoption decision is made. Another misconception is that because a birth mother is experiencing grief she is wavering on her adoption choice. Grief is very normal and is often a stage in the process of adoption, the birth mother is allowing herself to let go of her own dream to secure a different dream for her child.

The heart of a birth mother is like no other; it’s loving another human enough to put aside her own wants and needs to provide a life for her child. This birth mother huge heart is selflessly giving the gift of life to another woman, man, family who may not be able to conceive their own child. A birth mother will always remain a mother to the child she places for adoption, the love she has for her child never dies or is replaced, it just continues to grow.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 34: Adoptive Parent Hospital Information

This episode is specific to Arizona and Building Arizona Families Adoption Agency. The information contained in this podcast may or may not be applicable to other states and or other adoption agencies.

With Building Arizona Families Adoption Agency, we have a designated adoptive family case manager and a designated birth mother case manager. When you are at the hospital, your case manager will assist you in: Obtaining a nesting room at the hospital if the hospital allows it and has a low occupancy level.They will go over with you again what the birth mother’s hospital plan is and if she has changed any of her requests.If the birth mother wants you in the delivery room, most likely the birth mother case manager will also be in the delivery room. Most of the time the adoptive mother and (if invited) will stand behind her shoulder. Important things to know:

After delivery, the baby is banded and the birthmother receives a band and the adoptive mother receives a band; as only two are issued in addition to the baby. In order for there to be “re-banding” it requires two hospital personnel. After consents the baby is re-banded and both adoptive parents receive a band . The adoptive family needs to have a car seat for discharge.Make sure you have an outfit for the baby to wear homeHave something for the birth mother to carry out of the hospital, so she is not empty-handed: a stuffed animal, flowers, etc...

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 33: Making a Hospital Plan

Your hospital plan is basically a letter to the hospital staff, to the adoptive family, and to your adoption agency. It will detail what you want your hospital stay to look like, including who will be there, how you will give birth, how much time you want with your baby, and which items from the hospital you would like to bring home. By making a hospital plan you can make your desires known and help ensure they are met prior to birth.

Many birth mothers worry about how they will feel, how they will be treated, if they will be judged and how they will cope during their hospital time. Some women wonder if they will have time alone with their baby after birth, if they can feed or bond with their baby in the hospital, and whether they want the adoptive parents there in the delivery room.

Creating a Hospital Plan with your Adoption Specialist is an exciting time in your adoption journey for both you and your chosen adoptive family. A Hospital Plan is one part of your adoption plan. It is developed and distributed to all individuals involved in your adoption plan, so when you go into labor, everyone knows what your wishes are and are accommodated for. If you go to the hospital and want to change your Hospital Plan, that is fine, the plan is created as a baseline, so everyone involved in your adoption understands how you want your time at the hospital to be spent.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 32: Adoption Positive Language

Here are some reasons why adoption language is important. Educating others: There are a great many negative myths and ideas surrounding adoption. It clouds what can be a beautiful way to become a family in a scary light. Because of stories on the news, and uneducated members of society -that being adopted is shameful and something to be hidden, sometimes there is negativity surrounding the notion of adoption.Protect the pride and mind of the child as well as the families involved. Biological parents are no more “real” than adoptive parents. A biological parent can choose adoption for their child if they cannot provide for emotionally or financially, but they do not “give them away”. To avoid shaming a child. Telling a child “You’re so lucky your parents adopted you” sends a message that can cause shame, misunderstanding and confusion. There is loss involved in an adoption that children cannot easily underdstand. The adoptive parents are the lucky ones in this situation to be able to adopt. If you want to compliment a adoptive family you could say something like “You have a beautiful family."

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 31: Bonding With Your Adopted Newborn

Post adoption depression: What is it? Could it happen to you? Mothers frequently feel a loss when baby is born. Postpartum depression is common. Post-adoption depression is equally common, though hardly ever mentioned. Why feel down just when a monumental dream has come true? But after the high of waiting for baby to arrive, a let-down may be inevitable for emotional balance. Relating to an actual baby may also trigger a more-concrete sense of the loss of your fantasy child.

Fear that you might lose your new baby if anyone found out how you feel may also cause you to hide your stress, enhancing a sense of isolation. But moods change. The way you feel in moments of high stress is not how you will feel forever. Looking beyond dark feelings to what your baby needs and feels becomes the agenda of attachment.

Adoptive parents yearn to build a family while feeling terrified something will go wrong.

Bonding versus attachment: What’s the difference?

Bonding can be defined as the attachment that the primary caregiver feels for the infant. Bonding is about the love, care, and concern that are unique to your relationship with your baby. Attachment is a two-way reciprocal process between parents and their children. Attachment is an emotional connection that develops between an infant and the primary caregiver.

If you are ready to begin your adoption plan or just want to learn more about adoption- The best thing to do is to call our 24hour/7 day a week phone number at 623-695-4112 or our toll-free number, 1-800-340-9665

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 30: Understanding the Adopted Child

Understand that “adoption” may be difficult to speak about Children may not always be sure when and if we can speak about adoption, to whom, when, where and how much is okay to talk about.Some adopted children may not want to talk about adoption in front of anyone else.
Make sure that your adopted child knows they are adopted- don’t wait! Tell your child when they are younger and as they get older include more details that are age appropriate
Understand that separation and death can be a trigger In some aspects, regardless of the age a child is adopted, they may need a higher amount of reassurance than the average child.Adopted children want to feel secure and safe as well as permanency and focus on “forever.”Adopted children may have abandonment issues, even if they were adopted at birth.
Adopted children's behaviors should not always be attributed to adoption Children may just get angry sometimes and it has nothing to do with being adoptedSometimes it may be easier to attribute issues to adoption and when am adopted child grows through a behavioral phase, it may or may not have anything to do with being adopted.If an adopted child is sensitive about being adopted and has triggers, make sure you are aware of those triggers and work on preventative measures to avoid them and de-escalate them. If you are pregnant and are considering adoption, we are a licensed, full-service, non-profit Arizona Adoption Agency. You can contact us 24/7 at (623) 695-4112.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 29: Why Do People Adopt?

There are many reasons why people choose to adopt..

Whether they choose to adopt domestically, internationally or from the foster system (or an older child who is related to them), prospective adoptive parents recognize that there are many children who don’t have the safe, loving and supportive home environments they need. This is one of many reasons to adopt. Knowing that they can provide the family that this child needs, prospective adoptive parents decide to pursue the adoption process. 95% of people who adopt do so because of issues with fertility.To Avoid Passing Down Genetic Disorders / Diseases To Avoid Pregnancy Complications – Some women are predisposed to having difficult pregnanciesTo Balance Population Growth To become paarentsThey may be a single parent and want to start a familyThey know others who were adopted or have adopted and see it as a positive way to grow a family. So, if you are pregnant and are considering adoption, we are a licensed, full-service, non-profit Arizona Adoption Agency. We believe in adoption aftercare services and have a program on site to provide continued support through the Donna K. Evans Foundation. You can contact us 24/7 at (623) 695-4112. You are not alone and we want to help, thank you for considering adoption!

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 28: Choosing An Adoptive Family

Choosing an adoptive family for a birth mother does a few things in addition to moving her along in the adoption process: It makes her adoption decision real, she is looking at books of pictures of real families who are being presented to parent her unborn baby. This can create a myriad of emotionsSome birth mothers try to postpone or delay looking at profiles because it feels “real” at that point. While others actually find peace after selecting a family because now they can focus on getting to know the adoptive family and know that they are making a wonderful choice for their childIt can make a birth mother re-think her decision on which type of adoption she would prefer; normally this goes from closed to semi-open or open. When she sees the adoptive families she may see them as non-threatening, non-judgmental and accept that she is making an amazing choice and it will be better for her to be able to see her baby grow upBirth Mothers choose an adoptive family for reasons such as Type of Adoption PreferenceLocation of FamilyOther ChildrenPetsStay at Home Parent vs DaycareReligionLifestyle: Educated / Traveled / HobbiesReason for adopting This is what I see birth mothers do when looking at adoption profiles: Look at the covers of all first and usually wind up picking the first book they pick up. Some read every word, while others skim through.Some cry while looking at the books.All love to keep the book after choosing a family so they can create a connection and “study” the book.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 27: National Adoption Month

NationalAdoptionMonth

National Adoption Day is officially celebrated on the Saturday before Thanksgiving.

National Adoption Awareness Month is here! It’s a month-long event to encourage people to learn about adoption, recognize people who have been impacted by adoption, and organize positive adoption-related events.

Facts About National Adoption Day: The awareness color for Adoption is White.National Adoption Day is observed annually on the Saturday before Thanksgiving.To date, the dreams of 75,000 children in foster care have come true as part of National Adoption Day events. A foster child usually has to wait nearly 4 years to be adopted, but more than 20,000 kids age out of the foster care system at age 18 every year without either forever family or permanent home. The aim of National Adoption Day is to provide forever families to as many children as possible.

National Adoption Awareness Month is here! It’s a month-long event to encourage people to learn about adoption, recognize people who have been impacted by adoption, and organize positive adoption-related events. There are many ways you and your family can learn and participate this year! Retell Your Child’s Adoption Story to ThemSpread Awareness through Your Social MediaHave a Family Movie Month - Watch Positive Adoption-Related MoviesDonate Time and Money to a Local Organization that Supports AdoptionRead Adoption Related Books with your child If you are ready to begin your adoption plan or just want to learn more about adoption- The best thing to do is to call our 24hour/7 day a week phone number at 623-695-4112 .

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 26: After An Adoption Match Fails

How do you move forward after an adoption match fails. Listen to an adoptive family first-hand how he and his wife moved forward. Learn how to look part the grief towards the rainbow at the end of your adoption journey, how to restore faith in your adoption choice and how to grieve and move on.

Accept grief for what it is, understand it may be part of your adoption journey and if it is learn what to do to get through this difficult time. Learn more about the adoption process and how families move forward and what happens after an adoption match fails. Believe you will end up adopting the baby you were meant to have.

Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, the expert on grief said,“The reality is that you will grieve forever. You will not ‘get over’ the loss of a loved one; you will learn to live with it. You will heal and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered. You will be whole again but you will never be the same. Nor should you be the same nor would you want to.”

Recommendations: CounselingHealingSupport GroupsRe-EvaluateOpen Heart “Grief never ends… But it changes. It is a passage, not a place to stay. Grief is not a sign of weakness, nor a lack of faith… It is the price of love.” – author unknown

Adoption is always the beginning, never the end. Adoption may not have been your dream, but understand adoption is the dream of another woman who may not be able to conceive.

Building Arizona Families Adoption Agency. www.buildingarizonafamilies.com

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 25: Support & The Ability to Grieve

Services provided for Adoption Aftercare Services Education. Learn about your choice and the road which led you down it.Self-Care: Take care of yourself oin every area.Reading: A number of good books discuss the birth mother experienceFind specialized counseling. Therapy with other birth mothers. Individual counseling can be a means to address the past, to incorporate the past into the present, and to move into the futureBelief System Know, accept and believe that you are a mother to this childForgiveness. Know that you did the very best you could in the position you are in, the previous choices you had made and the circumstances surrounding your choice. Forgiveness of yourself is paramaount,.Acceptance. Find peace in yourself and in your decision. The Donna K. Evans Foundation is located at www.dkefoundation.com at 8433 N. Black Canyon Highway Building 6, Suite 158, Phoenix, AZ 85021.

"Neither society nor the adopter who holds the child in her arms wants to confront the agony of the mother from whose arms that same child was taken." ~Margaret McDonald Lawrence

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 24:Why More Teens Don't Choose Adoption?

Adoption is the least-prevalent option among pregnant teens. Research shows that only 1 to 2 percent of women place their children for adoption, and that the number of teens who place their babies for adoption has declined sharply over recent decades.

Teenagers' brains are still maturing and the following are some of the reasons that adoption may not be the ideal choice in their mind: Lack of education on adoption Sex Education – focus on abstinence only and not on what happens when an unplanned pregnancy occursFamily Assistance Parents/grandparents/ helpDelay in responding to the pregnancy, leaving them no time to planPlanet FantasyShort-Term Thinking If you are listening and you are dealing with an unplanned pregnancy and want more information about adoption, we are a local Arizona Adoption Agency, all of the information provided in this blog regarding birth mothers services are offered by our agency as we cannot speak for another agency and what they may or may not offer. We are available 24/7 by phone or text at (623) 695-4112. We can make an immediate appointment with you to get started on creating an Arizona Adoption Plan or just give you more information.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption 23: Changes in Abortion Across the United

Abortion conitnues to be a very hot topic and many states are reviewing and proposing law changes as well as ones that have passed and are enacted..

Between January 1, 2011 and July 1, 2019, in our country, states enacted 483 new abortion restrictions, and these make up nearly 40% of all abortion restrictions enacted by states in the decades since Roe v. Wade. Some of the most common state-level abortion restrictions are: parental notification or consent requirements for minors, limitations on public funding, mandated counseling designed to dissuade individuals from obtaining an abortion, as well as mandated waiting periods before an abortion.

States discussed include: Lousiana, North Dakota, Pennsylvania, and Florida. Big proposed changes in thise states are on the horizon and chnages in one state can impact and promote change in other states as well. For those believing in the preservation in life and the pomotion of adoption, many of these laws are exciting and promising.

Walking the adoption path rather than into an abortion clinic deserves recognition. Its time to learn more about abortion and its impact on women, men and our society, alongside learning what a positive impact adoption has. The time is now.

There are alternatives to abortion, and if you are dealing with an unplanned pregnancy and want more information about adoption, we are a local Arizona Adoption Agency. We are available 24/7 by phone or text at (623) 695-4112. We can make an immediate appointment with you to get started on creating an Arizona Adoption Plan or give you more information. Be educated about your unplanned pregnancy choice and alternatives to abortion in Arizona; your baby is counting on you!

With adoption, you are never alone, choose life. #youbeforeme

Epsiode 22. Adoptive Families Beginning the Adoption Process- What You Need to Know

We hold adoption information seminars across the United States, speaking to adoptive families about the adoption process and educating society on adoption.

In speaking with families interested in adoption, we are asked the same questions at every adoption seminar: What are birth mothers looking for in an adoptive family?What if I have other children, will I still be chosen by a birth mother? What if I am a single mother?Why is open adoption so popular is it like co-parenting? How long do you have to wait to have a baby placed with you? What affects the length of the wait?How do families afford an adoption? Often times birth parents choose a family based upon: Type of Adoption PreferenceLocation of FamilyOther ChildrenPetsFuture Childcare Plans: Stay at Home Parent vs DaycareReligionLifestyle: Educated / Traveled / HobbiesReason for adopting Building Arizona Families / AZ Pregnancy Help is a local adoption agency. If you would like to create an Arizona adoption plan, please contact us at (623) 695-4112. If you are considering placing baby for adoption and want to find a family for you baby in Arizona or anywhere in the United states, we can help. Please remember, there are alternative to abortion and we offer free unplanned pregnancy help. We also offer financial help for pregnancy when choosing adoption.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption 21: Adoption Reunification Part 2 of 2

Important Facts About Adult Adoption Reunification: It is not adoptees with poor relationships with adoptive parents that are most satisfied with birth family contact or as a result of negative adoptive family relationships.Every adopted person has two histories, one from their adoptive family and one from their birth family.When begining the quest as an adult adoptee:A), you may have feelings of being disloyal; as if you may not being faithful to your adoptive family. B) The serach process may take longer than you hoped for. C) The outcome may not be what you expected; there may not be a wish to have a relatoinship on both sides, different lifestyles may exisit, or maybe your fantasies are not at all the realtiy you encounter.Have a support structure and understand that adoption reunification is a process and real people with real lives and real feelings are involved. Building Arizona Families / AZ Pregnancy Help is a local adoption agency. If you would like to create an Arizona adoption plan, please contact us at (623) 695-4112. If you are considering placing baby for adoption and want to find a family for you baby in Arizona or anywhere in the United states, we can help. Please remember, there are alternative to abortion and we offer free unplanned pregnancy help. We also offer financial help for pregnancy when choosing adoption.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption 20: Adoption Reunification Part 1 of 2

Adoption Reunificaiton as An Adult Adoptee, the story, the understanding. From beginning to end, an inside look into what it is really like. Listen and learn from Kelly Rourke-Scarry as she shares her own story of reunification and correlates it to the Ruth A. Moran's 4 Stages of Emotion in Post Adoption Reunification.

Ruth A. Moran Identifiies 4 Stages of Emotion: An Adult Adoptee's Post Reunion Perspective

Paralysis: Adoptees may be overwhelmed by the amount of information they have received or its content. An adoptee may withdraw during this time and need their emotional space.
Eruption ; Emotions will wash over the adoptee like the aftershock of an earthquake. The adoptee will not know when these emotions are coming or how strong they will be, they can be like a tidal wave or a ripple. This stage is the period when the adoptee has had time to absorb the realities of her or his origins.
Loss & Grief: The introduction of the birthmother into the adoptee's life may cause the adoptee to grieve over what life events that cannot be recaptured were lost with their original parents. The adoptee must gradually accept the truth behind the adoption plan.
Empowerment: During empowerment, the adoptee moves beyond acceptance to the growth of a new self-knowledge and self-awareness. This is where further exploration and excitement may circumnavigate.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption 19: Why Adoption Aftercare Now?

Not all heroes wear capes, they just wear smiles and my mother wore I huge one. I learned this through my own adoption story.

I believe all people have a purpose in life; this is mine. All the roads in my life have lead me to where I am today. I do what I love, but more importantly, I am giving back and leaving a legacy of my mother’s story. Life doesn’t often offer second chances or do-overs and in the death of Donna K. Evans, there is no second chance. But what I learned and we all can learn is you can take something tragic and difficult and turn it into something beautiful and magical.

That is where I give my standard line of having to find peace within yourself and know that good vs. evil one and being proud of yourself is more important than other people being proud of you.

Support women through adoption, with your donation, encouragement and support you are helping a woman find her wings and fly toward her dreams.

The Donna K. Evans Foundation is located at www.dkefoundation.com at 8433 N. Black Canyon Highway Building 6, Suite 158, Phoenix, AZ 85021.)

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption 18: Adoption: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

As the co-founder and agency director, there is little I have not seen, heard or experienced. There should be no secrets in adoption. When public figures adopt it brings light and awareness to adoption, which assists in adoption awareness, but without releasing personal information it also breeds assumptions, myths and speculation.

The goal of this podcast is to bring to light truth; the good, the bad and the ugly. The heroes of adoption are the birth mothers; they show the bravery, commitment and selflessness to make adoption occur. So while birth mothers wear their cape, society needs to realize their struggle is real. Birth mothers may be married and the birth father of her unborn child may not be her legal husband.The family of the birth mother may not know about her adoption choice and may not even know that she is pregnant.Birth mothers may have intentionally become pregnant and then decided that it was not the right time to parent, not all babies placed for adoption are unplanned.Yes, birth mothers may have a list of possible birth fathers. This is also very common and this does not in itself negatively impact adoption.Sometimes a birth mother may plan on doing an abortion and then change her mind and make an adoption plan.Birth mothers who do more than one adoption may not always choose the same adoptive family for their second adoption.Sometimes birth mothers choose an open adoption and then disappear after the baby is born, for various reasons.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode 17: A Little Self-Esteem Can Go A Long Way

Self-esteem is the stairway out of the basement. Many of our birth mothers find themselves in negative life cycles and one reason for their adoption choice may be to break the familial negative life cycle. There is a common thread among many women who wear the moniker of low self-esteem.

Adoption can be a way to break a negative life cycle and climb out of the basement. Sometimes lives are reflective of being so deep in the ocean that you have to look for their air bubbles to find your way to the top. Adoption can be the air bubbles. Life has perpetual forks in its road, when you make a bad choice its hard to change and find your way back.

Self-esteem is not easy to rebuild. Change is hard and self-esteem once risen and can be easily broken down. I will tell you it takes a brave woman to walk into an adoption agency and say, I need to place my baby for adoption, I can’t bring a baby into my world. That’s an inner strength that many cannot fathom, but they will climb, claw, and fight their way to make sure their baby has every chance to live the life and experience the experiences that they themsleves may not have had the opportunity to have and experience.

Building Arizona Families / AZ Pregnancy Help is a local adoption agency. If you would like to create an Arizona adoption plan, please contact us at (623) 695-4112. If you are considering placing baby for adoption and want to learn more, we are here to help!

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption 16: Life After Abortion- A Father's Perspective

Its time to listen to a father's perspective on life after abortion. Understanding a father's perspective on abortion is rare and underexplored. Birth fathers have thoughts, feelings, emotions and pain over the abortion and it is time their voice is heard.

Whose right to choose is it really?

What life may really be like after an abortion. What emotions a mother and a father experience, for how long, and what does it feel like emotionall? Does the pain, guilt, shame, regret go away?

Various research studies suggest that there may be three categories of women who regret their abortion choice:

1)women who are affected by stigma of abortion

2) women who go on to change their beliefs on abortion and regret their choice

3) women who never really wanted to abort and were pushed into it.

In these studies, a good amount of the 95 percent women will at some point decide that abortion wasn’t the right answer for them according to a study posted by www.telegraph.co.uk/women/womens-life/11738638/Abortion-The-harsh-truth-about-how-women-feel-afterwards.html

There are alternatives to abortion, and if you are dealing with an unplanned pregnancy and want more information about adoption. We are available 24/7 by phone or text at (623) 695-4112. We can make an immediate appointment with you to get started on creating an Arizona Adoption Plan or give you more information. Be educated about your unplanned pregnancy choice and alternatives to abortion in Arizona; your baby is counting on you! www.ube4me.life

Paul David Petersen is an Arizona Attorney and a Maricopa County Assessor accused of running a multi-million dollar illegal adoption scheme. The charges span about three years and involve as many as 75 adoptions. Paul Peterson was charged in Utah, Arizona and Arkansas with counts including fraud, forgery, human smuggling, sale of a child, and conspiracy to commit money laundering.

Since adoption is a personal choice and for those people who have the desire to adopt; we do not believe it will negatively impact adoption interest, nor do we think it will lead to an increase in adoption. We do believe that there will be an overall impact and hopefully it’s a positive one resulting in an increase in adoption awareness and education.

The goal of this special podcast is to dive into the accusations of Maricopa County Assessor Paul Peterson and discuss our viewpoint as we gather information from different sources. Due to the fact that this particular case is in its early developmental stage, facts may change as well as different reports from different sources. We are not liable for the accuracy of information contained in this podcast.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption 14: Grief & Loss in Adoption: Adopted Children, Part 3 of 3

Understanding Grief and Loss in Adoption: Adopted Children. Listen and learn from an Adoption Professional as well as an adult adoptee.

At some point in an adopted child's lifetime, they may experience grief and loss. Adoptive parents can assit their children through the process of grief and loss and be supportive, loving and understanding. By gaining knowledge of what an adopted child may think or feel about his or her adoption journey will enable the adoptive parents to be prepared and educcted about how to react. Knowledge is power and education is paramount in understanding the world of adoption.

An adopted child can thrive in an adoptive home and can be secure, loved, feel safe and still have thoughts and feelings related to his or her adoption. It doesn’t mean that the adoptive parents are not doing a “good enough” job or something is lacking. These are normal and natural thoughts and in my opinion why open adoption is benefical.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption 13: Grief & Loss in Adoption Part 2 of 3: Adoptive Families

Adoptive parents may experience grief and loss to some degree both before, during and after the adoption process. Understand that with adoption comes change; people deal with change in different ways; some easily acclimate to change, while others take time and may experience grief. Adding a a new family member can take time, effort, acceptance and sometimes outside assistance may be helpful. Change can be difficult and everyone deals with it differently.

Resources for adoptive parents are more readily available now than 50 years ago. Learn about resources that are available to you.

Not all adoptive parents adopt because they cannot biologically have children. However, for those individuals that cannot biologcally conceive have to let go of one dream to begin another. Letting go of a dream of bearing your own biological children is a loss. It is important to resolve issues surrounding the loss of this dream before starting an adoption plan.

Remember, taking a different route in life isn’t always easy and may not have been your original plan or dream. Adoption most likely is not the road your child’s birth mother's first choice either.. Adoption shouldn’t be looked at as plan b, it should be viewed as journey to parenthood, a blessing. Life often reminds us that when one door closes another door opens. Thankfully, life affords us opportunities and adoption is an opportunity to become a mother or father.

“We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.” – Joseph Campbell

Grief & Loss In Adoption: Part One : Birth Mothers

“There are two different kinds of strength. There’s the strength to make a parenting plan and then there’s the strength to give that plan to another.” Unknown

Birth Mothers do experience grief and not to acknowledge it would be unfair to those experiencing grief and negligent on behalf of society. To understand birth mother/ birth father grief is to acknowledge part of the process of adoption. Adoption is a beautiful choice for an unplanned pregnancy, but it is never an easy one; especially for the woman who resembles the tree trunk of adoption; without a birth mother there is no adoptee and no adoptive parents.

Grief and loss in adoption is something that is not often talked about; but is needs to be for so many reasons. Adoption is beautiful, but with every high there is a low. Grief can be outlined in stages and stages of grief are not always experienced sequentially and they can be revisited as well. Kübler-Ross outlines the Stages of Grief as : 1) Denial 2)Anger 3) Bargaining 4) Depression 5)Acceptance.

Birth mothers’ grief; what we need to know:

Understanding that grief is part of the adoption journey and she needs to be helped through it. Ways that may help inclide; working through the stages of grief, learning her triggers, find coping methods, counseling, joing a support group, focus on self-care, excersize when medically cleared, find a group of other birth mothers.

If you are listening and you are dealing with an unplanned pregnancy and want more information about adoption, we are a local Arizona Adoption Agency and we are available 24/7 by phone or text at (623) 695-4112.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption, Episode # 11. Adressing the "Elephants" in the Adoption Room.

Adoption has so many variables, phrases, various aspects, misunderstandings, myths and unaddressed areas. Its time to address those issues about adoption so we as a society can become more adoption knowledgeable. The goal of this podcast is to address those areas that we often avoid about adoption for variosu reasons; lack of knowledge, incorrect asssumptions, awkwardness, unfamiliariity and more.

Some issues we are goignt o tackle today include: Birth Fathers- sometimes there are more than oneAsking adoptive parents about their reasons for adoptingAnd so much more Join us as we venture into the adiotion world and tackle the somewhat taboo issues so we can break down the barriers of adoption, eucate society and make our world adoption friendly.

If you are preganant and considering adoption, call or text us 24/7 at 623-695-4112.

Abortion is a subject that can be very controversial, however in my experience, often times the strongest abortion advocates have the little understanding of adoption or abortion. Adoption education is paramount. It is impossible to fully understand the global impact that abortion has on adoption without facts. Abortion has been a highly debated topic, often frequenting the news, as well as various states debating on new laws, its important to be educated. The #YouBeforeMe Campaign not only promotes the entitty of adoption, it provides adoption awareness and elevates the value of life. www.ube4me.life

Three important aspects to consider:

Adoption is an alternative to parenting, while abortion is an alternative to pregnancy. Adoption is free for birth mothers, while abortion involves medical costs.Adoption provides permanent relationships and abortion often has a lifelong emotional impact.There is little to no support for women after an abortion procedure. The #YouBeforeMe Campaign's goal is to provide education regarding adoption and abortion. After speaking to hundreds of pregnant women, especially women that have had abortions to this prior to this current pregnancy- did not have a basic knowledge or understanding of adoption; most importantly , they did not understand the basics of adoption, such as: Where to go to find out about making an adoption plan.The process of adoption.The resources and assistance an adoption plan can provide. If you are dealing with an unplanned pregnancy and want more information about adoption, we are a local Arizona Adoption Agency. We are available 24/7 by phone or text at (623) 695-4112.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption 9: The Life of a Birth Mother: Snowflakes

Birth mothers come from all walks of life. There is no “typical” birth mother and is a mistake to stereotype a birthmother. There are often similarities, but every single birth mother is different, like a snowflake. The portrait of a birthmother has changed over the past fifteen years, but to stereotype or categorize is wrong. Attributing factors in Arizona may include, but not be limited to: Lack of Social ServicesFinancial HardshipsIncreased PovertyIncreased Drug Use Birth mothers are not all teenagers or college students, in fact we see very much the opposite. The age range I have seen in the past fifteen years ranges from the age of thirteen up until the age of forty-five. Majority of the birth mothers we work with are between the ages of twenty-two to thirty-two.

Adoptions are not all open and they are not all closed. Most adoptions we see are semi-open; where they receive letters and pictures and maybe a visit or two. This is just the beginning of incorrect stereotypes surrounding adoption that we want to clarify.

If you or someone you know is facing an unplanned pregnancy and considering adoption, a licensed adoption agency is the best option. Local licensed adoption agencies can meet face to face, hold your hand when needed, and can remain with you throughout your pregnancy. In addition, you can visit your case worker after placement. Building Arizona Families/ AZ Pregnancy Help is a licensed adoption agency. You can call or text us 24/7 at: 623.695-4112.

Birth Mother Matters in Adoption; Episode 8:Talking to Adopted Children About Being Adopted.

Adoptive Parents often wonder when is the right time to tell their adopted child that they are adopted. They want to learn how to tell them, which resources to use and how to utilize them, how to normalize adoption among their family and friends and lean about hows, whys, dos and don'ts in speaking with adopted children about adoption. Understanding the reationale behind adoption language, timing, frequency and body language are all important factors in discussing adoption with adopted children.

Building Arizona Families Adoption Agency has worked with hundreds of adoptive families and children and has both personal and professional experience with adoption.

Adoption is becoming more and more talked about and with more knowledge, comes more questions. Knowledge is power, so lets become “adoption powerful” because as a society, the more we understand adoption, the more normalize the adoption process, the more accepting it will become, which I believe will negotiate abortion being the popular option and will push adoption to the default option when parenting is not an option.

To grasp the entity of domestic adoption is to understand how a roller coaster works and jump on the roller coaster. Don’t close your eyes because the journey is just as important as the outcome. There will be highs and lows for the birth mother and the adoptive family, but the shared goal is an adoptive placement. Learning about all the triads in adoption is beneficial for everyone involved because in order to understand a fraction it helps to understand and grasp the whole equation.

So let’s become “Adoption Powerful.” Learning about all triads of adoption is beneficial to everyone involved because in order to understand a fraction it helps to understand the whole equation. Please email adoption questions to birthmothermatters@gmail.com. We will be answering additional questions in future podcasts.

If you are listening and you are dealing with an unplanned pregnancy and want more information about adoption, we are a local Arizona Adoption Agency. We are available 24/7 by phone or text at (623) 695-4112. We can make an immediate appointment with you to get started on creating an Arizona Adoption Plan or just give you more information.

Your adoption choice, open, semi-open or closed, is one hundred percent your choice. An uplanned pregnancy and an adoption choice does not have to mean that you never see your child again.

If you are on the fence as to deciding between an open or a closed adoption, most birth and adoptive parents find that speaking and meeting with one another before making a commitment, helps them to decide whether to move forward with an adoption plan. Meeting in person allows the birth and adoptive parent(s) to get to know one another and often provides the birth parent(s) with the confidence of knowing that they have selected the best family for their child. Many birth parents who have ongoing contact with the adoptive family, find that receiving information about the child and knowing that the child is thriving, helps to ease their feelings of loss.

Birth parents and adoptive parents can decide to communicate directly with one another before, during, and after the adoption process is complete. That contact can take place in many different ways including through the exchange of emails, letters, phone calls, Skype calls, and in-person visits.

If you are facing an unplanned pregnancy and considering adoption, a licensed adoption agency is your best option. Local licensed adoption agencies can meet with you face to face, hold your hand when needed, and can remain with you throughout your pregnancy. In addition, you can visit your case worker after placement. Lastly, a local licensed adoption agency will be able to assist you with resources in your area and may even be able to provide transportation when needed. Building Arizona Families is a licensed adoption agency that can walk with you every step of the way. We would love to hear from you to find out how we can help. You can call us 24/7 or text us 24/7 at 623.695-4112.

The mission of the Donna K. Evans Foundation is helping women after placing a baby for private adoption. The goal is to provide women a safe place to return for help; to reach their own life goals and dreams after private placement of their baby for adoption. Any woman who has placed a baby for adoption, regardless of the agency used for their adoption, may utilize our services at any time after the adoptive placement.

Adoption matters. At the Donna K. Evans Foundation, we understand and value all aspects of the adoption triad: the birth mother, the baby and the adoptive parents.

The Donna K. Evans Foundation was developed to focus on the needs, wants and desires of a birth mother after placement. The opportunity provided by the DKE Foundation, enables a woman to choose a path for her life with support, assistance and resources.

If you are intersted in volunteering or donating, please call Maura Celaya at: (480) 392-0146 or email at maura@dkefoundation.com

Other ways to support women after they place their baby for adoption through the DKE Program: Monetary DonationsGED Study GuidesOne day bus passesPrepaid cell phone minutesCar Seats The Donna K. Evans Foundation is located at 8433 N. Black Canyon Highway Building 6, Suite 158, Phoenix, AZ 85021. With your donation, encouragement and support you are helping a woman find her wings and fly toward her dreams.

Read more about the Donna K. Evans Foundation on our website www.dkefoundation.com

It’s a normal question, because most people are unaware of many ways adoption benefits the biological mother who places a baby for adoption. The beautiful process of adoption offers a tremendous upside for the biological mother that have the potential to be life changing.

Some examples include (some are exclusive to our agency): Select and meet adoptive parentsChoose an adoption plan best for you - open adoption, closed adoption or in-betweenReceive photos and updates for at least 18 yearsReceive counseling both during pregnancy and after placementFinancial assistance to pay rent, utilities, food, clothing and household expensesCell phone and cell phone serviceTransportationMedical care for yourself and your babyBreaking a negative life cycleGiving the gift of lifeReceiving aftercare services to improve life outcomes including education, employment, and increased financial stabilityChoosing the adoptive parent(s) for the babyReceiving assistance that covers expenses during pregnancy and immediately after (if qualified) for housing, medical, counseling, and other expensesChoosing open adoption (if preferred) to remain in your child’s lifeBeing assured that the baby is being cared for how you would want your child raisedAccess to the Donna K. Evans Adoption Aftercare Program to assist you in rebuilding your life An unplanned pregnancy may be an uncomfortable or unpleasant reality in your current situation. Most of us have been faced with a situation or circumstance we wish we weren’t in, or in a position we wish we weren’t in. It can feel easier to avoid, evade, or refuse to accept reality. Please understand, you don’t have to face this alone.

The abortion issue! So as an agency, we decided to take a stand and be bold.

After seeing on the news that celebrities are seeking to emulate the #metoo hashtag with the #youknowme hashtag so women who have had an abortion can stand together in unity. WHAT?!?! Where is the hashtag for ADOPTION???

We launched the You Before Me campaign. We believe that courageous women who choose adoption, deserve their own hashtag! The hashtag #YouBeforeMe is a way a birth mother can proudly own the choice of adoption to protect the life of her baby. Abortion should never be a choice, as it robs the unborn child of their own choices and adoption is a beautiful alternative to abortion in Arizona. Building Arizona Families & AZ Pregnancy Help are here to help!

As co-founder of the agency, I always tell birth mothers to be proud that they chose life, proud of their courageous sacrifice, and to stand strong in their belief that choosing life is the best choice. Today, many women who were once addicted, homeless, in abusive relationships, etc., are proud of their choice to put their baby’s life first. Adoption is a positive choice for everyone – the baby, the birth mother, and the adoptive family. Adoption changes lives and futures. Adoption is a positive choice for so many women who believed they had no choice.

It’s time to celebrate a woman’s right to choose adoption and to give women the necessary resources so that they have a viable choice. We are committed to helping make that choice possible. The You Before Me movement celebrates with the courageous women who choose life for their child through adoption.

Stand with us and stand tall!

Visit our website: ube4me.life

Taking the First Step in Making an Adoption Plan

If you find yourself pregnant and parenting, regardless of your reason is not an option for you. Take the first step, accept that you are pregnant. Your life is not going to spiral out of control, you are in the driver’s seat and can stay in control. You don’t have to do this alone.

Adoption is a big decision, it’s a choice that can feel overwhelming and mind boggling, but it doesn’t have to. Placing a baby for adoption is a choice that life has come to when reality prevails over dreams and finality over promise.

Adoption is the ultimate sacrifice. It’s a mother’s gift of life and a promise to her child, a life she cannot provide. She fights every maternal instinct to place her baby with a family who can provide that coveted life. A mother will put the needs of her baby before her own needs.

Do understand, adoption is not without heartache for a birth mother. Dealing with regret, fear, guilt are just the beginning emotions a birth mother feels. The fear of judgment or condemnation from family, friends and even strangers can become paralyzing. As an agency, we work with our birth mothers to combat the negative feelings and emotions and focus on the positive ones. A change in perspective is paramount in the ability to look past one’s fears and celebrate one’s decision. Adoption is a celebration of hope, promise and life. Sometimes the best choices are the hardest choices but strong women chooses life, but an even stronger woman chooses adoption.

Building Arizona Families Adoption Agency Co-Founder Kelly Rourke-Scarry and Radio Personality Ron Reigns, developed a podcast to provide education, support, interviews and news regarding adoption. This podcast is geared for anyone interested in adoption, considering adoption, in the adopted process, and for women who are pregnant and considering adoption.

Adoption is a triad of three entities: Birth Mother, Adoptive Parents and the Adoptee. This Podcast focuses on all aspects of adoption; placing emphasis on the birth mother, while at the same time encorporating and interweaving both the adoptee and the adoptive parents. Looking at adoption through a magnifying glass, enabling listeners the ability to see all three entities of the triad, thereby gaining a more thorough perspective. Understanding the most misunderstood member of the adoption triad, the birth mother, will enable listeners to see clearly the complete, beautiful portrait of adoption.