Conversations with Dr. Jennifer: Recent Episodes
Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife
Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife is a sex and relationship expert who has been interviewed for hundreds of podcasts. You can access all the amazing content covering issues of faith, sexuality, integrity, belonging, and more right here on the interview archive! Dr. Finlayson-Fife is an LDS relationship and sexuality coach as well as a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor in the state of Illinois. Dr. Finlayson-Fife also has a Ph.D. in Counseling Psychology. The advice offered through any and all podcasts in which she is featured is educational and informational in nature and is provided only as general information. It is not meant to establish a therapist-patient relationship or offer therapeutic advice, opinion, diagnosis treatment or to establish a standard of care. The information contained in these communications is not comprehensive and does not include all the potential information regarding the subject matter, but is merely intended to serve as one resource for general and educational purposes.
We've received many requests over the years to offer Dr. Finlayson-Fife's resources in other languages. Miriam Parkin has generously offered her time and talent to translate episodes for us and we will add them to the feed as they come in (in addition to our regular podcast production schedule). You can listen to the original "Having Sex vs Making Love" podcast HERE.\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_En este episodio, Dan Purcell, del podcast *Get Your Marriage On*, le pide a la Dra. Finlayson-Fife su perspectiva sobre la diferencia entre tener sexo y hacer el amor, así como sobre lo que las parejas pueden hacer para aportar mayor profundidad espiritual a su relación sexual.
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Many of us grew up believing spirituality is the obedient, contained part of ourselves and sexuality is the unruly part that has to be reined in. But the two actually develop along the same path. We start in fear, trying to follow the rules we were given, and with maturity we move into something more integrated, more our own. That shift can feel like something is going wrong, but it's actually how we find our way to our own integrity, in both our sexuality and our spirituality.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Dr. Heidi Hastings of the Marriage IQ podcast to explore how sexual and spiritual growth move through the same developmental stages, what it looks like to move from an external sense of self to an internal one, and why that shift changes both a marriage and a person's relationship with faith and God.
Attraction isn't just about chemistry. It's tied to meaning, and meaning can change. In a long-term marriage, what we find desirable in a spouse is shaped less by biology and more by the meanings underlying the relationship. When those meanings shift, desire shifts with them — leaving you either pulling away from a spouse you once desired, or trying to make sense of one who's pulled away from you.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife answers listener questions about attraction, touching on how to build desire in a marriage where it wasn't there to begin with, what it means when a spouse admits they don't feel attracted to you, and how old patterns of resentment and control can undercut desire without either partner realizing it.
Want to learn more? Enroll in the Sex Worth Wanting course!
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We like to think that proficiency at work carries over into our personal relationships, but excelling in a career and excelling in love draw on entirely different strengths. High-demand careers reward constant competence, and it feels good to have a system built around you, where people defer to you because it's their job, but a spouse sees the version of you that colleagues and patients almost never do, including your shortcomings and missteps.
That exposure is uncomfortable, especially for someone used to having everything together, so many find it easier to hide in their competence at work than show up honestly at home.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Dr. Richard Low of the Next Level Dentist podcast to talk about the impact high-demand careers have on relationships, including the gap between the self we bring to work and the self we bring home, the intimacy that forms naturally with people you're solving problems alongside, and what safeguards to put in place for work relationships.
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Resentment shows up when we've given more than we can back up, when we've gone along with something we never actually wanted, or when we've given with strings attached — hoping that giving will lead to being loved or appreciated more. But resentment is more than just a feeling, it's a signal worth paying attention to. We can let our resentments smolder under the surface, or we can use them to better understand ourselves, our desires, and where we need to be more honest with ourselves and others.
In this NEW podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Susie Pettit of the Love Your Life Show to talk about resentment, the difference between selflessness and self-erasure, and what it actually takes for women to step fully into their own lives, their relationships, and their desire.
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We've received many requests over the years to offer Dr. Finlayson-Fife's resources in other languages. Miriam Parkin has generously offered her time and talent to translate episodes for us and we will add them to the feed as they come in (in addition to our regular podcast production schedule). You can listen to the original "Loneliness in Marriage Q&A" podcast HERE.
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Cuando nos casamos, la mayoría de nosotros imaginamos una vida plena de conexión y compañía. Sin embargo, cuando uno se siente ignorado, no elegido o decepcionado por la manera en que su cónyuge se presenta —tanto emocional como sexualmente—, el matrimonio puede comenzar a sentirse solitario y aislante.En esta sesión de preguntas y respuestas de una hora de duración, la Dra. Finlayson-Fife responde a las inquietudes de aquellas personas que se sienten no elegidas, aisladas y desconectadas en su relación más importante.
Parenting a teenager is hard enough before sexuality enters the picture. And when it does, most parents grapple with finding the balance between protection and permission, values and flexibility, structure and trust. The role you play in your child's sexual development doesn't stay fixed. It shifts as they grow, and knowing when to hold a limit and when to let go is rarely as clear as we'd like it to be.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Marielle Melling of the Raising Healthy, Happy Teens Virtual Summit to discuss what sexual integrity is, why it matters for your teen's long-term wellbeing, and how parents can nurture it through every imperfect, evolving stage of the process.
For a deeper dive on teaching kids about sexuality, enroll in Dr. Finlayson-Fife's How to Talk to Kids About Sex course!
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We tend to assume men are naturally sexual, comfortable with desire, and quick to want sex. But comfort and ease are not the same thing. Many men carry a private discomfort with their own sexual nature, especially men raised in traditions where sexuality is treated as suspect. And so they look to their wife's desire to make their own sexuality feel acceptable, a dependency that hides behind the appearance of confidence.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Rhonda Farr to talk about men's difficulty with their own sexuality, why higher desire can mask a deeper insecurity, and how men can move from proving themselves through sex to actually blessing their marriage through it.
Johnny is done being controlled.
His faith shift made him realize just how much every decision he ever made was shaped by others — and he's not interested in that anymore. In his newfound freedom, he's been experimenting with substances in a way that's unsettling for June.
When she says something about his choices, he responds like a rebellious adolescent.
Staying quiet feels easier, of course, but Johnny's choices are having a real impact on her, and she's not sure where her responsibility ends and his begins.
In this preview episode of Room for Two, Dr. Finlayson-Fife works with Johnny and June around the parent/child dynamic that is stifling the intimacy in their relationship.
This preview episode will resonate with listeners who:
- Are in a mixed-faith or post-faith-shift marriage
- Are navigating a partner's substance use
- Feel like their spouse's parent
- Crave more intimacy and connection
To unlock the FULL episode and over a hundred more that are just as powerful, SUBSCRIBE TO ROOM FOR TWO
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Dating, sexuality, and romantic relationships are tricky enough when we're young — but life experience, past hurts, and complicated relationship histories add a whole new layer of complexity for those of us who are single in midlife. The simple answers and guidelines that once felt sufficient don't quite hold anymore.
If it feels like the framework and guidance you were offered as a teen isn't working, it's because it was intended for someone at an entirely different stage in life. Midlife singlehood asks something more, because you've lived enough to know that life doesn't always go as planned, and the choices in front of you now carry a depth and consequence that call you toward the spirit of the law, not just the letter of it.
During this Q&A discussion, Dr. Finlayson-Fife speaks directly to mid-singles — whether never married, divorced, or widowed — answering their real questions on topics including:
- What chastity actually means for adults with sexual history
- How to relate to desire and sexuality without fear running the show
- Dating wisely without repeating old patterns
- What to look for in a partner
- How to use this season as an opportunity for growth — regardless of what comes next
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When a spouse's faith shifts, the anxiety that follows is real. Most of us want to find a way around it, so we seek reinforcement from friends, try to pressure them back into their old position, or just avoid the conversation altogether. But avoiding a difficult reality doesn't make the anxiety go away. In fact, it increases it.
In this Q&A episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife takes questions from those navigating mixed-faith marriages, including how to share where you are without demanding your spouse follow, how to stay collaborative when your worldviews have diverged, and how to raise children when you no longer share the same spiritual framework. Because it is in going toward the hard conversations, not around them, that we grow, and that our marriages can too.
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We've received many requests over the years to offer Dr. Finlayson-Fife's resources in other languages. Miriam Parkin has generously offered her time and talent to translate episodes for us and we will add them to the feed as they come in (in addition to our regular podcast production schedule). You can listen to the original "Developing Spiritual Maturity" podcast HERE._________Jody Moore, del podcast Better Than Happy, entrevista a la Dra. Finlayson-Fife sobre el tema de la madurez espiritual. En la conversación abordan:- La importancia de la madurez espiritual y cómo alcanzarla.- Cómo vivir la vida con mayor honestidad y en consonancia con la propia integridad.- El proceso de abordar la obediencia con sabiduría.- El verdadero significado del pudor y cómo enseñarlo con sensatez.- Por qué el perfeccionismo es una virtud falsa y cuál es la verdadera naturaleza de la bondad genuina.- Cuáles son los frutos de la madurez espiritual.
All of us start out following the rules of our family or group because we want to stay safe, earn approval, or belong to something larger than ourselves. Safety and belonging are not small motivations, they're important and necessary steps on the pathway of our moral development.
But obedience is the first law of heaven for a reason. It was never meant to be the final one. Obedience lays the foundation for us to grow towards something far greater: integrity.
In this conversation with Larkin Swain of the Sanctuary Podcast, Dr. Finlayson-Fife walks through her three-stage framework for spiritual and psychological development and explains the role of obedience in each stage. We begin in fear. We grow into belonging. And in Stage 3, we use the moral compass we developed in Stages 1 and 2 to make our decisions not from fear or compliance, but from our own integrity. When we make that shift from living by the letter of the law to the spirit of it, it can feel like something has gone terribly wrong. But it hasn't. It's actually the whole point.
SHOW NOTES:
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Joy is not something we stumble upon. And it's not freedom from suffering. Nor is it the same thing as happiness. Joy is the willingness to see the beauty and goodness around us, even in the midst of difficulty and loss. Joy is a disposition toward living, not a feeling that comes and goes. And developing the capacity for it takes courage.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Monica Packer of the About Progress podcast to explore what joy actually requires of us, why eros love is at the heart of a marriage that stays alive, and what it means to stop trying to change your spouse and start asking who you want to be instead.
SHOW NOTES:
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Most of us enter parenthood knowing it will be both challenging and rewarding. We expect difficulty. We expect exhaustion. But what we don't expect — and what we can never be fully prepared for — is a life-altering diagnosis and the grief that follows when reality doesn't match what we had envisioned for our child and our family.
In this episode, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Brad Broyles and Nathan Palmer of The Polaris Connection Podcast to share more about her own experience as the mother of a son with autism. She discusses the difficulty and overwhelm she faced early on and the unglamorous process of learning to stop trying to solve her son and start truly choosing him.
While this conversation centers on parenting a child with autism, it speaks to the universal challenge of loving our children as they are rather than as we imagined them to be.
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This episode was originally recorded in 2022, when my mother was very much alive — in fact, she had just taken up ballroom dancing at 89.
By the time the episode aired in 2023, she had been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. How quickly things change.
She passed away in early 2024 and I have been missing her ever since.
My mom loved me wholeheartedly. She was present through every confident and successful moment in my life and every doubt-filled one. Her love shaped me and the work I do tremendously.
My mother wasn't perfect. None of us are. But she loved with her whole heart, and I have spent my career believing that kind of love is possible — in part because I was the recipient of it.
Whether you are celebrating your mother today, grieving her, or reflecting on the kind of love you want to give — I hope this episode offers you something meaningful.
<3 Jennifer
Most of us enter marriage hoping to lock in someone who will love us, support us, and make us feel okay about ourselves — no matter what. So when friction, disagreements, and disconnection show up, it can feel like something has gone terribly wrong.
But marriage wasn't designed to keep us comfortable. It was designed to pressure our growth. And the engine of that growth is conflict — the honest collision of two people who see the world differently learning to love each other and create a shared life that makes room for both of them, in all their difference.
In this conversation, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Amy and Greg Langford of the Undressing Intimacy Podcast to explore the ideas at the heart of her book That We Might Have Joy. They discuss what happens when we stop asking marriage to manage our sense of self and start letting it do what it was actually designed to do. The reward is not comfort, Dr. Finlayson-Fife teaches, it's something better — genuine desire, real intimacy, and the gift of two people choosing to share their life with each other.
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The couples who approach Dr. Finlayson-Fife about sexual dissatisfaction often aren't struggling with frequency — they're struggling with meaning. The attraction, the aliveness, the passion that once came so naturally seems to have slipped away.
In this NEW episode, Dan Purcell of the Get Your Marriage On Podcast asks Dr. Finlayson-Fife for her perspective on the difference between having sex and making love — and what couples can do to bring more soulfulness to their sexual relationship.
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We tend to think of eros as strictly about sex. But in its truest meaning, eros is the human soul's longing for communion — for connection beyond ourselves. It is the impulse that draws us toward God, toward truth, toward knowing and being known by another person. Eros is what enlarges our souls. And it is also the thing we most resist — because eros requires risk.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Tim and Aubrey Chaves of the Faith Matters podcast to explore the powerful ideas at the heart of That We Might Have Joy. We are re-airing this popular episode to bring attention to Dr. Finlayson-Fife's book discussion and signing in Boston on April 23rd. Learn more and get your tickets HERE!
Every relationship is a negotiation between two different minds. But when one of those minds is wired differently—more impulsive, more interest-driven, or more easily overwhelmed by the gap between intention and follow-through—that negotiation can become especially complex.
In this live Q&A, Dr. Finlayson-Fife is joined by ADHD coach, educator, and advocate Kamden Hainsworth to explore what neurodiversity looks like inside intimate relationships. Together, they respond to listener questions about attention, overwhelm, responsibility, and connection—and what it really takes to build a strong, collaborative marriage when ADHD is part of the equation.
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We tell ourselves stories about who we are — and most of us have been telling the same ones since childhood. The Enneagram doesn't just teach us about our personality type, it exposes the story underneath it. Through the Enneagram we can learn why we cope the way we do, what we're afraid to lose, and what's possible when we're willing to loosen our grip on the narrative that's been organizing our life.
In this Q&A episode, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife is joined by bestselling author, psychotherapist, and Enneagram teacher Ian Morgan Cron to explore how the Enneagram can transform the way we understand ourselves and the people we love.
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Couples who change in a real way are sometimes the ones willing to face the genuine possibility of ending their marriage. Not as a threat or a tactic, but as an honest reckoning with what they stand to lose and who they really are. After all, you can't give a meaningful yes to something if there's not a viable or real no.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife uses listener questions to guide a discussion about the decision whether to stay in or leave a marriage. She talks about what it looks like to be in a marriage without having truly chosen it, why ambivalence is never a neutral place, how to know when divorce is the right answer, what it means to put your marriage on the line as an act of honesty rather than control, and why desire can't exist where fear or obligation is running the show.
ANNOUNCEMENTS:
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Despite their reactions to our attempts to discuss it, our children are looking to us to help them make sense of their sexuality. And while talking to kids about sex can feel deeply uncomfortable — for reasons that are actually quite natural — avoiding these conversations comes at a cost.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Holly J. Moore of the Made for Moore podcast to discuss how parents can approach conversations about sex and sexuality with their children in a way that is honest, ongoing, and shame-free. They explore why discomfort doesn't have to be a barrier, how to begin these conversations early and keep them going, and how offering values around sexuality — rather than fear or shame — empowers children to make informed, confident, and integrity-driven choices as they grow.
Want to learn more? Enroll in Dr. Finlayson-Fife's How to Talk to Your Kids About Sex course!
Join us for a FREE Q&A about the Enneagram - click HERE for details!
Brad and Kate have been working to understand themselves and each other better, using the Enneagram to better understand how they each respond to stress and disconnection. They've been talking more openly and defending less—but when tensions rise, Brad moves toward action and physical closeness, hoping connection will bring relief while Kate pulls back, wanting to feel emotionally secure before opening up. This leaves Brad feeling rejected and Kate worried that intimacy is more about sex itself than truly being with her. Because Brad seems steady on the surface and Kate is openly emotional, it's easy for both of them to assume she's the problem—but they're equally dysregulated, just in different ways.
Want to unlock the full episode and over a hundred more that are just as powerful? Subscribe to Room for Two!
You married a whole person. The spontaneity, the creativity, the aliveness — and yes, the forgotten appointments and the missed recitals too. But learning to love a whole person — both their virtues and their vices — is the real work of marriage.
When neurodivergence is part of the picture, it's easy to get lost in what your partner isn't doing, or to lean on a diagnosis to justify your impact on the other. But a real partnership requires taking full responsibility for the gifts and burdens of the mind and body you were born with.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Kamden Hainsworth of the Busy Brained Saint podcast to talk about what it looks like for both partners in a neurodiverse marriage to show up as whole people — owning what is theirs, releasing what isn't, and finding more freedom than they expected on the other side.
Listen to learn more about:
- What it means to take full responsibility for the gifts and burdens of the mind and body you were born with — for both partners
- How a diagnosis can build genuine compassion — or quietly become a way to avoid growth
- The one-up/one-down dynamic that takes over neurodiverse marriages — and how both partners sustain it
- Why releasing the need to change or manage your spouse is what actually opens the door to real intimacy
- How truth — not false hope — is what gives couples the clarity to choose each other well
ANNOUNCEMENTS
Join us for a FREE Q&A about Neurodiversity in relationships, click HERE for details!
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The JFF Book Club starts 2/19, you can join HERE for six interactive discussions with Dr. Jennifer!
Falling in love is easy. Staying in love requires our maturation. A few years (or decades) into marriage, it's tempting to wonder if we just married the wrong person—the passion has faded, the differences feel more irritating, and that deep sense of connection doesn't feel as natural as it once did. And while it is tempting to think that something is going wrong, really, marriage is just inviting us to stop chasing what was and to start creating something deeper.
In this episode, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins the Date Your Spouse team to talk about what couples can do to bring a sense of aliveness to their marriage. She challenges the idea that going along to keep the peace is an act of love, explains why duty-based sex quietly destroys desire, and offers a surprisingly simple practice any couple can try TONIGHT to create more intimacy and connection.
If you're looking to create more passion and connection in your relationship, enroll in Dr. Jennifer's new Sex Worth Wanting course!
Many of us were taught—directly or indirectly—that sexuality and spirituality are at odds, and that suppressing our sexual selves brings us closer to God. But what if that story is wrong? What if our sexuality is actually one of the primary ways we learn how to love?
In this episode, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Dan Purcell of the Get Your Marriage On podcast to discuss her book That We Might Have Joy and the role of eros energy—the aliveness that emerges when couples stop running their marriages from fear, control, and ego. Through stories from the book—like Samuel, whose fear of sexual feelings kept him stuck, and Bradley, whose relentless pursuit of sex was driven by shame—Dr. Jennifer shows how sexual repression doesn’t make us more spiritual. It just keeps us fragmented.
Together, they explore why sexual integration—not suppression—is what leads to greater freedom, strength, and intimacy.
Change is hard and it's not just because you lack willpower. Change is hard because it asks you to step into a version of yourself that feels unfamiliar—the one who’s still learning to speak honestly, love wholeheartedly, and tolerate the discomfort that comes from facing ourselves honestly.
The unease you feel when you start to change isn’t a sign that something’s wrong. It’s a sign that your brain is doing exactly what it needs to do to grow.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife uses questions submitted by listeners to drive a discussion about how we can create transformation in ourselves and in our relationships.
Listen to the full episode to learn:
- Why most resolutions fail (and what actually creates lasting change)
- How to navigate the discomfort of growth without retreating to old patterns
- The power of self-confrontation
Learn more about your upcoming events HERE: https://buytickets.at/jenniferfinlaysonfifephd
Many of us learned early on that being good meant following the rules, keeping everyone happy, and never causing discomfort. So maybe you find yourself saying yes when really, you mean no. Perhaps you agree to host the family gathering, even when you’re already overwhelmed, or give in to your teenager’s demands because you don't want to deal with the fallout of their anger.
In this NEW episode, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Jody Moore of the Better Than Happy Podcast to explore the crucial difference between compliance and true goodness. They discuss the difference between being kind and being compliant, why prioritizing other people’s comfort over your own integrity is harmful, and what your resentments can teach you about yourself and the way you show up in relationships.
If you found this episode helpful JOIN US for the Sexuality and Selfhood Workshop in Alpine, UT!
In Part 2 of Dr. Finlayson-Fife's conversation with Dr. Justin Coulson of the Happy Families Podcast, they discuss how couples can prioritize intimacy amidst the demands of parenting. Dr. Finlayson-Fife also tackles what to do when your child walks in on you during an intimate moment, offering age-appropriate language to help children make sense of what they saw without catastrophizing the experience.
NOTES:
You can purchase "10 Sex Myths That Are Destroying Your Sex Life" HERE (it's only $29!)
Many of us have inherited cultural scripts that position men as the "main character" in sexuality while women exist to serve and support. This framework turns intimacy into work instead of play—and when sex becomes work, desire disappears.
In this conversation, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Dr. Justin Coulson of the Happy Families Podcast to discuss how our ideas about gender roles undermine genuine connection. The conversation unpacks why women's desire shuts down when sexuality is framed as caregiving, why tolerated sex creates resentment on both sides, and what has to shift if you want to move from dutiful encounters to the kind of passion and intimacy you're both craving.
Join us in Irvine, California this month for the Strengthening Your Relationship Workshop (SAVE $100 with code SYR2026)!
Development isn't a gentle process. Development often happens when our worldview shatters. And that shattering hurts, but it's what helps us develop a truer map of reality.
In this conversation with Taylor Church of the Of Stone and Clay Podcast, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife walks through her own marriage journey to illustrate what relational growth looks like. She shares how marriage revealed parts of herself she didn't want to see and how learning to stay in honest conflict has helped her relationship grow over the years. She also discusses how couples unknowingly co-create the dynamics they resent, and what it means to actually love and value your partner for who they are.
In this preview episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife works with Brad and Kate, a couple who feels a chill in their relationship that they can't seem to shake. Sound familiar? Subscribe today to unlock this FULL episode (plus the entire Brad and Kate series and hundreds of other episodes that are just as relevant and helpful!).
Falling in love is a gift. Staying in love requires something more—the willingness to grow into someone who can hold both connection and individuality without losing either.
In this conversation with Taylor Church of the Of Stone and Clay Podcast, Dr. Jennifer draws from her new book and research on sexuality to explore how we move from the magic of falling in love to the deeper work of creating lasting intimacy. She offers wisdom on navigating difference, sustaining desire, and why the challenges of marriage are not necessarily failures but invitations to grow.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
- Sexual integration and what it means for intimate relationships
- How shame shapes our experience of sexuality
- Why vibrant living matters more than physical perfection for attraction
- The difference between accommodation and genuine choice in intimacy
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We've received many requests over the years to offer Dr. Finlayson-Fife's resources in other languages. Miriam Parkin has generously offered her time and talent to translate episodes for us and we will add them to the feed as they come in (in addition to our regular podcast production schedule).
Our Christmas Sale is Live! Save 20% on all Full-Length courses (plus get an additional discount when you purchase two or more!)
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En este episodio del podcast, la Dra. Finlayson-Fife conversa con Dan Purcell del podcast Get Your Marriage On.
Hablan sobre...
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Las 3 etapas del desarrollo sexual y cómo llevar su matrimonio al siguiente nivel
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La importancia de cultivar la energía erótica en la relación
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Cómo pasar de tener relaciones sexuales a una conexión profunda a través del acto de hacer el amor
The word libido can make it seem like desire is predetermined and out of our control—we either have it or we don't. In reality, desire is remarkably fluid—shaped by the meanings we attach to sex, our sense of self, and the kind of relationship we’re stepping into.
In this NEW episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Tammy Hill of the Live Your Why podcast to discuss libido and sexual desire. They explore how biology, medications, aging, stress, and hormones can influence our sexual desire—but emphasize that the meanings we carry about sex, marriage, duty, and self-worth are usually the most powerful drivers of all.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife also responds to three common scenarios:
- a husband who uses data and calendars to justify his sexual entitlement
- a man who responds to sexual differences with persistent whining
- a mother overwhelmed by young children who feels too “touched out” for sex
In each example, she offers insight into how shifting the underlying meaning—not just the behavior—can help couples create a more grounded and mutually satisfying sexual dynamic.
SAVE 20% on Dr. Finlayson-Fife's BRAND-NEW COURSE with code SWW20
With the holidays ahead, many of us are getting ready for extended-family gatherings—and the fun, stress, and complexity that can come with them. Our extended-family relationships can be particularly challenging because they push directly on our differentiation. As Dr. Finlayson-Fife teaches, few things—aside from marriage—expose our difficulty with differentiation quite like spending time with the families we grew up in.
In this NEW episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife answers audience questions about common extended-family challenges, including enmeshed parent–child relationships, triangulation, intrusive or overstepping in-laws, sibling competitiveness, and families that resist change. She talks about how couples can stay steady in these situations by being clear about how they want to function, holding to their integrity, and choosing honest, grounded ways of relating—regardless of the pressures around them.
Many of us carry sexual shame that began long before adulthood. The tone of our childhood homes, the way our parents handled emotion and mistakes, and the silence or anxiety surrounding the body all shaped how acceptable our desires—and our imperfections—felt to us. Those early messages often linger, coloring how we see ourselves and even how we imagine God sees us.
In this NEW episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Chris Rich of The Mixed-Faith Relationship Podcast to unpack where sexual shame comes from and how it shows up in adulthood. She explains how shame turns toxic when it convinces us that our flaws make us unworthy, and she offers a clearer, kinder way forward—one that helps us accept our embodied nature, integrate our sexuality, and relate to ourselves with more honesty and compassion.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
- What sexual shame actually is—and how it develops
- How childhood experiences shape comfort with desire
- Why many of us confuse anxiety with “God’s judgment”
- The difference between healthy inhibition and toxic shame
- How both repression and indulgence keep us stuck
- What genuine sexual integration looks like
- How to foster healthier, shame-free conversations with our children
JOIN OUR MAILING LIST HERE and you'll get the link to join us for an online screening of "The Mormon Sex Therapist" on Thursday!
We've received many requests over the years to offer some of Dr. Finlayson-Fife's resources in other languages. Today we are thrilled to be offering our first episode in Spanish (a translation of THIS popular episode from the archive). We are incredibly grateful to Miriam Parkin for offering her time and talent to translate this episode and look forward to offering more resources in Spanish in the future!
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El conflicto surge naturalmente cuando dos personas intentan construir una vida juntas y representa una valiosa oportunidad de crecimiento si lo permitimos.
Cuando no estamos de acuerdo con nuestra pareja, solemos recurrir a comportamientos que causan dolor y frustración, en lugar de esforzarnos por encontrar respuestas más productivas y colaborativas, aunque a menudo parezcan contraintuitivas.
En este episodio, la Dra. Finlayson-Fife se une a la coach de relaciones Anne Nelson para hablar sobre cómo las relaciones pueden crecer y prosperar, incluso ante el conflicto y las diferencias.
When a marriage feels painful or uncertain, it’s easy to tell ourselves we just need more time to figure out the "right" thing to do. But there’s a difference between taking time to make a wise choice and staying stuck because we’re afraid to face the difficult reality of what we know is true. Real hope invites growth and honesty. False hope keeps us waiting for something to change when there’s strong evidence it never will.
In this NEW episode, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife answers questions from listeners wrestling with whether to stay or leave their marriages. She explores why peace doesn’t come from certainty, but from the courage to act with integrity—choosing what we believe is most right, even when both paths carry loss.
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Join us for a date night with Dr. Jennifer on November 8th in St. George!
In this NEW episode, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Jane Copier of the Happy in the Middle podcast to speak directly to women in midlife who feel disconnected from desire or unsure of how to bring themselves back into their marriages. She explains why this stage—though often uncomfortable—is full of possibility: a chance to stop living on autopilot, get honest about what you want in your life, and create more peace and connection in your relationship.
If this episode hits home, you'd love The Art of Desire course for women: https://www.finlayson-fife.com/courses/course/the-art-of-desire
Get the Book: https://amzn.to/48HnuUC
When pornography shows up in our lives or relationships, our instinct is often to meet it with fear, shame, silence, or attempts to control. But these responses don’t bring peace—they keep us anxious, afraid, and disconnected from ourselves and each other.
In this episode, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Lauren Yarrow of The Blonde Apologist to offer a powerful reframe for those struggling to understand or navigate pornography—whether in their own lives, in marriage, while dating, or as parents. Drawing on insights from That We Might Have Joy, Dr. Finlayson-Fife explains how growth doesn’t come through control or avoidance, but through honesty, self-understanding, and integrity.
JOIN US FOR THE ART OF LOVING RETREAT
Relationships feel easy when things are going well—when we feel understood and everything between us feels steady. They’re much harder when we’re frustrated, disappointed, or misunderstood. Yet it’s in those moments of friction and honest conflict that we’re invited to grow—to become wiser, more grounded, and more capable of real love.
In this NEW episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Monica Tanner to share insights from That We Might Have Joy and explore how conflict in marriage isn’t a sign that something’s gone wrong, but part of the very process through which deeper intimacy and peace take shape.
Join us for Date Night With Dr. Jennifer!
Few struggles cut as deep in marriage as mismatched desire. When one partner feels perpetually rejected and the other feels endlessly pressured, resentment builds.
In this NEW episode, hosted by Rhonda Farr, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife draws from Chapter 3 of her book That We Might Have Joy to unpack how repression drives obsession, why intimacy is so difficult to tolerate, and how agency and integrity can open the way to real communion in marriage.
JOIN US FOR THE ART OF LOVING RETREAT!
Order That We Might Have Joy HERE!
Many Latter-day Saints grow up learning that the body and pleasure are threats to spirituality—that sexuality is something to fear or control. These teachings were often given with good intentions, but they were also misinformed, and they have made it harder for many to find peace in marriage and within themselves.
In this NEW episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the hosts of the All Things for Good Podcast to explore how our own theology, rightly understood, offers a far richer view: that the body is a spiritual gift, and that sex can become the sacrament of marriage—a way of knowing God, ourselves, and each other with more honesty, love, and joy.
Preorder your copy of That We Might Have Joy here: https://amzn.to/4gu0FW9
Join Dr. Finlayson-Fife at LDS CAPA's Fall Conference here: https://ldscapa.org/events-page/
Your kids are learning about sex—whether you talk to them about it or not.
And if you’ve ever wished Dr. Finlayson-Fife could coach you through these important conversations (and honestly, who hasn’t?), this episode is for you.
In this conversation, Dr. Finlayson-Fife offers practical guidance for parents who want to raise sexually healthy, thoughtful, and confident kids.
You’l learn more about:
- How to foster a relationship where your kids feel safe bringing you their questions and concerns
- Setting limits and expectations without shaming or controlling
- Supporting a child who is questioning their sexual orientation
- Navigating conversations when you and your spouse don’t see eye-to-eye
If you'd like to learn even more, enroll in Dr. Finlayson-Fife's How to Talk to Your Kids About Sex Course!
In this episode, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Hunter Otis of the Pxrn Free Revolution podcast to explore the hidden pressures men carry around sexuality. They discuss why porn is such a tempting escape, how cultural and personal messages keep men stuck, and—most importantly—how stepping out of hiding can lead to greater freedom, honesty, and deeper connection in their lives and relationships.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
- Why pornography becomes a counterfeit refuge
- How cultural and family messages fuel shame / secrecy
- Why secrecy keeps you stuck
- What integration actually looks like and how to work toward it
Join us for the Art of Loving Retreat this September! Learn more HERE.
For many women, sex feels like something to get through—another duty to manage, another expectation to meet. And yet, the more we pressure ourselves to “fix” our difficulty with desire, the more elusive it becomes.
This is because desire cannot be manufactured. It will never come from obligation, attempts to appease, or from sheer willpower. It only thrives in freedom—when we feel true to ourselves, at ease in our own skin, and at peace with how we are showing up in our lives.
In this NEW episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife unpacks why women so often struggle with desire and and what they can do to cultivate a sexual relationship that feels alive and worth wanting.
Listen to the full episode to learn:
- Why you can’t force yourself into desire
- How duty-based meanings suffocate women’s eroticism
- The crucial differences between men’s and women’s sexuality
- Why freedom and authenticity are the lifeblood of passion
Join us for the Art of Desire Retreat! Click HERE to SAVE $100 with code Desire!
In this NEW episode of the Faith Matters podcast, Dr. Jennifer joins Tim and Aubrey Chaves to share insights from her long-awaited book That We Might Have Joy. They discuss how sexuality is not a distraction from spirituality, but a pathway to it—that intimacy and desire can help us grow into deeper integrity, more honest marriages, and more profound faith.
You can PREORDER YOUR COPY of the book HERE. If you'd like to get a signed copy, JOIN US AT RESTORE (use code JFF2025 to SAVE 10%!). We will be having a special book launch event on the evening of September 25th and Dr. Finlayson-Fife will be on the main stage on September 27th—you don't wait to miss it!
In this episode, listeners joined Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife for a Q&A discussion about her soon-to-be-released book, That We Might Have Joy (order your copy HERE!).
During the conversation, she answered listener's questions about the process of writing the book, how she decided on the topic, and what lessons she learned along the way. But, true to form, Dr. Finlayson-Fife offered more than just simple answers to questions during this discussion—she challenged limiting cultural messages about the body, spoke about the courage it takes to face the truth in our relationships, and explained why intimacy always begins with self-honesty.
If you'd like to get a SIGNED copy of the book, join us at RESTORE (use code JFF2025 to save 10%) or at a special Faith Matters gathering on October 1st!
We have a busy schedule this fall! Click HERE to learn more about our upcoming events, we'd love to have you join us!
We’re re-releasing our most-listened-to episode ever—and for good reason.
In this powerful conversation, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Carol Lynn Pearson, Stephen Carter, and Dan Wotherspoon to talk about the real purpose of marriage—and why the challenges we face in it are what drives our personal and spiritual growth.
They discuss how marriage can stretch us in the best ways—pushing us to confront ourselves, to move through conflict instead of away from it, and to build something real and lasting in the process.
In the episode, you'll learn more about:
- Why conflict is often a doorway to intimacy
- How monogamy pressures us to evolve
- What Mormon culture gets wrong—and right—about marriage
- Why creating a strong marriage is a spiritual process
If you’ve ever wondered why marriage feels so hard sometimes, and whether it’s supposed to be easier—this episode will meet you right where you are.
In the episode,Carol Lynn Pearson's poem "The Steward" is referenced
On August 12th Dr. Finlayson-Fife will be launching the pre-order link for her new book! JOIN OUR MAILING LIST for details!
It’s easy to see your partner as the problem when things feel unfair—but often, the patterns we feel stuck in are ones we’ve unwittingly helped create.
In this NEW episode, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Monica Packer of the About Progress podcast to talk about what it means to be a thoughtful changemaker in your relationship. They explore how to recognize when you’ve been over-accommodating—and how avoiding conflict or ignoring your own desires can quietly erode both your well-being and the strength of the partnership.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife teaches that change begins by owning your role in the current dynamic—and using that clarity to engage in honest, collaborative conversations with your partner.
JOIN US for one of our upcoming events!
In this NEW episode of the Phoenix Forte podcast, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife offers guidance for women navigating the emotional and spiritual work of healing after divorce, especially when infidelity has been involved. She discusses how disconnection from the body and sexuality is a tempting strategy—but one that ultimately keeps us from experiencing peace and connection with ourselves.
JOIN US in Provo, UT this summer!
Neurodiversity brings a unique set of strengths—and challenges—to intimate relationships.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife responds to listener questions about how traits associated with autism and ADHD shape the dynamics of marriage. Drawing from her own life and work, she explores what it means to love someone whose brain works differently than yours—and how couples can create more peace, closeness, and partnership across those differences.
- Please excuse the poor audio quality—the recording was not great, but the content more than makes up for it, so we are publishing anyway!
Many men carry inherited messages about masculinity and sexuality that quietly undermine their peace with themselves—and interfere with their ability to show up with strength and clarity in their marriages.
In this powerful conversation with Rhonda Farr, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife challenges those inherited ideas and reframes strength—not as certainty or control—but as the courage to look honestly at yourself. The courage to tolerate feedback, consider your impact, and use discomfort as a catalyst for growth.
This episode also explores how men can navigate vulnerable conversations with greater maturity—especially around painful dynamics like feeling undesired or unchosen in marriage.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
- The difference between immature and mature masculinity
- Why so many men feel unchosen—and what they can do about it
- How the need to be seen as good can keep us from actually being good
- The essential role of discomfort in love, leadership, and growth
Don't miss our FATHER'S DAY SALE — through Sunday you can save 25% on The Art of Loving course AND (or) the Enhancing Sexual Intimacy Course!
What do you do when you’ve faced yourself, stepped into clarity, and still… your spouse won’t (or can’t) lean into the relationship?
In this Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Greg and Amy Langford of the Undressing Intimacy podcast to talk about the painful reality many couples face: when you want more honesty, connection, and intimacy—and your partner doesn't seem to want the same.
This episode dives into the difficult soul work of learning to tolerate what we can’t control, teases out the difference between patience and clinging to false hope, and offers guidance on how we can handle disappointment in our relationship with maturity.
Click HERE to learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife's relationship and sexuality courses for couples!
Sexuality is an important part of our spiritual and relational lives—but for many Latter-day Saints, it’s also a source of confusion and anxiety.
In this new episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Kurt Francom of the Leading Saints podcast to talk about how church leaders can best support their congregation in matters of sexuality—not by avoiding the topic or using fear-based messaging, but by offering a more hopeful, honest, and empowering vision of how our God-given sexuality can bless and enrich our lives.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
- What healthy leadership around sexuality can look like
- Why fear and shame don’t help people make better choices
- How to talk with youth in ways that build confidence and self-respect
- How healthy sexuality strengthens faith, integrity, and intimacy
Our sexual thoughts can be unruly and strange—but sharing these unique parts of ourselves with a spouse can be a powerful way to build intimacy and connection.
In this episode, Dr. Jennifer answers questions from our Facebook Group about the role of fantasy in long-term relationships. She explores why fantasy often feels taboo, and how—when grounded in morality and friendship—it can become a meaningful tool for strengthening intimacy and deepening connection.
The lack of discussion about the Divine Feminine has negatively shaped our culture and limited our understanding of what it means to be female. In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife breaks down the cultural misconception that femininity is equivalent to weakness and offers a beautiful perspective on the strength of feminine intelligence and the powerful role that strong femininity plays in healthy relationships, communities, and societies.
TODAY ONLY SAVE 30% on the Art of Desire course!
David has been battling a pornography compulsion for much of his life. He’s read the books, listened to the podcasts, joined the groups, and tried every program he could find. But despite his best efforts, his behavior continues.
The repeated use—and the cycle of disclosure that follows—has taken a toll on their marriage. David is upfront when he slips—but this is in the form of turning to Alexa for forgiveness and reassurance. When Alexa distances following his disclosure, he often grows impatient.
In this episode of Room for Two, Dr. Finlayson-Fife works with David and Alexa to better understand what’s keeping them stuck. She offers David a new perspective—that he would benefit from acknowledging the part of him that wants the escape of pornography, and that until he confronts that reality, genuine change will remain out of reach.
Subscribe to Room for Two to listen to the FULL episode (and the rest of the David and Alexa series)
Many people long for more ease and passion in their sexual relationship—but unknowingly bring meanings to sex that interfere with both.
When sex becomes a duty to fulfill, a performance to manage, or a tool to reassure a partner, it loses the very energy that makes it feel alive. The pressure to produce intimacy, validation, or an orgasm can quietly unravel the conditions that desire needs in order to thrive.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife uses questions from her audience to unpack why so many of us struggle to feel ease and desire in our sexual relationship—and what we can do to can create a more soulful and passionate connection with our partner.
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Join us for the Art of Desire Workshop in Gilbert, Arizona next week! Use code DESIRE to SAVE $100
It's hard to know how to address doubts, concerns, or frustrations about the church, especially because we tend to link "goodness" with being unquestioning.
Many worry that sharing their experiences or voicing their concerns will be misconstrued as a lack of faith or a full rejection of the gospel. The temptation is to stay silent in an effort to preserve harmony—or to speak up but in ways that ultimately shut down understanding, but neither of these approaches allow for the type of meaningful conversations that are requisite for creating positive change.
In this powerful conversation, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Amy Watkins Jensen of Women on the Stand to discuss how women can engage in meaningful and honest conversations about their experiences in the Church and how daring to do so is what will allow us to create more honest and inclusive faith communities.
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Join Dr. Finlayson-Fife in Arizona for the Art of Desire Workshop! Click HERE and use code DESIRE to SAVE $100
When sex feels like an obligation rather than a choice, it erodes intimacy, fosters resentment, and leaves partners feeling distant and disconnected.
In this powerful Q&A discussion, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife explores the complexities of "duty sex" including what drives it and the detrimental impact it has on relationships. She discusses the powerful meanings we attach to sex, and how these meanings can either undermine desire by creating a sense of obligation or foster connection through choice and mutual desire. She offers insight into how both higher and lower-desire partners can step away from patterns of pressure and compliance and cultivate a more fulfilling sexual relationship built on mutual desire, authentic connection, and a sense of being truly chosen.
Many women, especially those raised in sexually conservative cultures, receive the message—directly or indirectly—that being spiritual or “good” means distancing themselves from their sexuality.
This framing often leads women to see their sexual nature as something to suppress in order to maintain their spiritual worth or desirability. As a result, many enter marriage believing that sex is a duty they perform for their husband rather than an expression of their own identity, pleasure, and well-being.
In this episode, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Tanya Hale of the Intentional Living Podcast to challenge these cultural messages and offer an important reframe on women's sexuality. They discuss the ways these messages undermine women’s sense of self and self-respect and explore how integrating sexuality and spirituality allows women to reclaim desire, develop deeper self-trust, and cultivate more equal, fulfilling relationships.
If you are ready to rethink your relationship to desire and sexuality, JOIN US for the Art of Desire Workshop in Gilbert, Arizona! Use the code DESIRE to SAVE $100 on your ticket!
Dan and Marie were happy enough in their marriage, until they started listening to Room for Two.
Listening to the Dave and Carly series woke them up to the fact that even though their marriage was peaceful and good, it wasn’t as honest as they had believed it to be, and they wanted to create something better. So they got to work – listened to podcasts, worked through courses, and even attended a couples’ workshop. Their efforts to bring more honesty and authenticity to the marriage paid off and they caught occasional glimpses of what their relationship was really capable of, but...
old habits die hard, and despite the progress, they often find themselves slipping into their familiar pattern of trying to manage how they are seen and experienced, which leaves their sexual engagement feeling lackluster and “vanilla.”
In this episode of Room for Two, Dr. Jennifer works with Dan and Marie to help them better understand what their intimate relationship is exposing about their relational dynamic, and how honesty and authenticity will open the door for them to create the spark and passion that they long for.
Want to hear the FULL episode? Subscribe to Room for Two and gain immediate access to this and over 100 other full-length Room for Two episodes!
A woman's arousal is highly connected to her sense of freedom in her relationship.
Yet so many of us create relational realities where women don't feel free — where sex is about managing a spouse's sense of self or "needs." In this mindset sex becomes another job to do. And as Esther Perel says, "sex can be work or play, but it cannot be both."
When you create a relationship with your spouse where you feel free to be who you are, free from managing their sense of self, and free to show your strength, sex becomes a place you want to be —a place of ease.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife answers questions about female arousal and orgasm. She discusses the impact of societal and personal beliefs on women's sexual experiences, the connection between emotional freedom and sexual well-being, and offers practical advice for overcoming common challenges women face such as performance anxiety, self-judgment, and the aftermath of sexual trauma.
To learn more about this topic, enroll in Dr. Finlayson-Fife's Art of Desire course! Or, better yet, join us for one of our upcoming Art of Desire Events!
Many of those who develop a compulsive relationship with pornography aren’t just looking for sexual gratification—they’re looking for a type of relief.
These are often people who appear most put together on the outside—the responsible student, the dedicated churchgoer, the child who carries the family’s expectations. With little space to process stress or be truly known, pornography becomes a tempting, private escape from the pressures of life. But over time, this creates a growing divide between their public persona and private reality, reinforcing shame and deepening their sense of fracture and isolation.
This pattern often carries into marriage, where rather than risk the exposures of real intimacy and connection with a spouse, porn continues to be an easy escape.
In this NEW episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Taylor Chambers to discuss how we can turn challenges related to pornography into opportunities for personal and relational growth. They explore the systemic issues that contribute to porn use, the impact that unwanted porn use has on marriages, and how we can use conflict and crisis in our relationships as opportunities to learn more about ourselves and create meaningful growth in our capacity for real intimacy.
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In the episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife discusses the Zach and Kelly Room for Two series. Subscribe to Room for Two to listen to the entire 7-episode series! Dr. Finlayson-Fife also mentions her upcoming Art of Loving Retreat in St. George, Utah. You can join the interest list for that retreat HERE.
With a changing body and shifting relational roles, midlife can be a challenging time for many women, but it is also an important time of self-discovery and self-definition, a time that we can more fully embrace who we are, and experience tremendous personal and relational growth.
In this conversation, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Dr. Mallorie Cracroft of the Uplift for Her podcast to discuss the unique challenges and opportunities that women face during midlife. They dive into the physical, emotional, and relational shifts that happen as we age and how these changes can impact our sense of who we are. They also explore how women can live with more authenticity and self-acceptance, and how doing so paves the way for richer experiences, even (especially!) in later years.
Click HERE to learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife's Art of Desire course for women OR join us for the Art of Desire Retreat in Oregon this fall!
When couples are in an erotic, thriving marriage, it's not about new sex positions, it's about creating a relationship where there is a sense of aliveness and authenticity. And nothing creates this type of energy in a relationship more than intimacy--really knowing your spouse and being known by them in return.
Passionate marriages are for those who are courageous enough to let go of the masking and the attempts to control and instead bring their full, imperfect selves to the other and tolerate letting their spouse know them enough to really choose them (imperfections and all). In this powerful Q&A session, Dr. Finlayson-Fife takes questions from her audience about how to keep passion alive in long term marriages.
Want to learn more? Enroll in Dr. Finlayson-Fife's Enhancing Sexual Intimacy course -- currently 20% off for Valentine's Day!
Most relationships start with a spark, a strong desire for sexual connection with the other.
But as the years pass by the spark often fizzles, and our partners can start to feel like coworkers as our focus shifts to managing schedules, balancing budgets, and keeping up with the kids.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins host EmyLee McIntyre of the Limitless Female podcast to discuss how we can keep the spark in our marriages ALIVE amidst the responsibilities and drudgery of adulthood, and how sexuality doesn't just belong in the margins of our lives, but can be woven into the day to day in the way we connect with and relate to ourselves and our partner. This episode isn't just about getting the spark back, it's about transforming how you see and experience intimacy in your marriage.
Listen to learn more about:
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Intimacy beyond intercourse
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The impact of anxiety / depression (including medication) on desire
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Agency and choice in sexuality
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"Fighting Fair" in marriage
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Prioritizing partnership
In the episode, EmyLee mentions how much she loves the Room for Two podcast. You can learn more about the podcast HERE.
Join us in St. George for the Strengthening Your Relationship couples' retreat! Learn more HERE!
Despite their reactions to our attempts to discuss it, our children are looking to us to help them make sense of their sexuality.
And while the prospect of talking to kids about sex can feel daunting, these conversations—no matter how imperfect—make it clear to our children that we care about them, are invested in their wellbeing, and can handle discussing difficult topics with them.
During this 2024 Restore presentation, Dr. Finlayson-Fife shares valuable insights on how parents can foster an ongoing, healthy, and honest dialogue with their children about sex and how doing so will empower them to make informed, confident, and integrity-driven choices around sexuality. For a deeper exploration on these topics, enroll in Dr. Finlayson-Fife's recently updated How to Talk to Your Kids About Sex course!
Through 1/31/25 you can SAVE $200 on The Art of Desire Retreat w/code EARLYBIRD
Last chance to join us for the Enhancing Sexual Intimacy Webinar - Click HERE for details!
Many of us received messages about our bodies, modesty, and sexuality that were driven by fear and the idea that our sexual impulses are stronger than we are. For many of us, those fear-based messages made it difficult to feel at peace with our bodies and our sexual nature. If we want to teach about these important topics in a healthier way, it's imperative to focus on the good -- that our bodies and sexuality are God-given and an important part of who we are.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the hosts of Saints Unscripted for an important discussion about modesty. They talk about the impact that cultural misunderstandings about modesty have had and how we can rethink what it means to be modest. They also discuss how we can teach our children about modesty in a way that is less about restrictions and guidelines and more about protecting and valuing the incredible gift of their sexuality.
Join us for the Strengthening Your Relationship Retreat!
Learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife's Intimate Deception mini-course HERE
Navigating the aftermath of a disclosure or discovery of intimate deception (including emotional or physical infidelity, pornography use, financial deception, etc.) is a painful and complicated process. In this Q&A session, Dr. Finlayson-Fife addresses audience questions about emotional and sexual infidelity and gives guidance on what is required for couples to rebuild trust and connection after there has been a breach of trust in the marriage.
Join us for the Strengthening Your Relationship Retreat!
One of our most challenging tasks as parents is to keep track of what our responsibilities are as our children grow.
Stepping back as they mature and allowing them the space to sort out their own lives and path can be incredibly difficult, especially if you are concerned that their choices will have a negative impact on their well-being. In our fear and worry for them, it can be easy to mistake manipulation with love.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Tina Gosney of the "Coaching Your Family Relationships" podcast to discuss some of the challenges that parents face when their child steps away from family faith traditions and how parents can best support and love their children, even when their worldviews diverge.
In this special Christmas edition Q&A, Dr. Finlayson-Fife took questions from her audience about difficult family dynamics, communication difficulties, and other relational difficulties that tend to come to the fore during the holidays.
Merry Christmas, everyone!
When you’ve been betrayed, it can be instinctive to distance yourself from sexuality altogether.
But what we need most in the aftermath of betrayal is deeper strength within ourselves, and this internal strength is developed by coming to peace with ourselves, including our bodies and our sexual nature.
In this NEW episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Ashlyn Mitchell of the This Is Ashlynn podcast to discuss the obstacles and anxieties that many women face as they move forward in the aftermath of betrayal and what resources are available to them as they do the difficult work of understanding and reclaiming their relationship to themselves and their sexuality.
You can watch the recording of this episode HERE.
During this Q&A Discussion, Dr. Jennifer addresses questions from her audience about various issues related to low sexual desire (particularly in men). She highlights the importance of understanding the biological, psychological, and relational factors that impact sexual desire and offers input on how couples can address their sexual anxieties and improve their sexual dynamic. If you would like to learn more about how to address the difficulties in your sexual relationship, consider enrolling in the Enhancing Sexual Intimacy course or joining us for the upcoming Enhancing Sexual Intimacy webinar.
You can watch the recording of this discussion HERE.
The ability to self-author is a crucial developmental milestone—one that many adults struggle to achieve. To self-author is to develop an inner moral compass. It is to develop the self-trust that can guide us in making principled, honest choices in the face of life’s challenges without dependency on others to tell us who to be or what is true.
The ability to self-author is important in being able to create solid, close relationships. And because it matters for our happiness, it is especially important for parents to foster this ability in their teenagers.
In this NEW episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Christi Davis [host of the “Liking the People You Love” podcast] to explore how parents can support teens through their turbulent transition into adulthood. They discuss how parents can create thoughtful, value-based guidelines around sexuality—particularly on topics like modesty and masturbation—that prioritize the child’s well-being. And how parents can foster their teen’s ability to make self-directed decisions driven by their highest values rather than fear, shame, or conformity.
Our bodies are incredibly wise.
Our limbic system in particular is very effective at keeping us safe from immediate danger. But while this protective mechanism serves an important purpose, it can also create lasting challenges when it remains vigilant and intrusive long after the real danger has passed.
For those who have experienced sexual trauma, a common and intuitive response is to distance ourselves from sexuality or even shut it down entirely to protect against further harm. While this reaction is understandable, it can create a deep disconnection from a core part of who we are. This disconnection not only disrupts our sense of peace and ease in our own bodies, it can also impact our capacity for intimacy–both emotional and sexual.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife answers audience questions about the impact of sexual trauma on relationships and well-being. She explores the body’s self-protective response, the impact on our sense of self, and how those who have experienced trauma can move toward healing.
Resources mentioned in the episode:
"Living at the Bottom of the Ocean" [Dr. Schnarch's final manuscript]
The Body Keeps the Score
Brain Talk
* Subscribe to Room for Two!
*Dr. Finlayson-Fife earns a small commission when products are purchased through these links
Join us on Friday, November 15th at 11 AM MT for a FREE Facebook Live on Sexuality After Trauma | Click HERE to Reserve Your Spot!
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Jen Banks and Sarah Ziroll of The Best Birth Podcast to discusses the impact that pregnancy and postpartum can have on sexual desire and intimacy. This period of intense emotional and physical transition can often be challenging, but Dr. Finlayson-Fife teaches how with self-regulation, compassion, and understanding couples can actually use this period as an opportunity to grow closer together.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
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The importance of self-compassion
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What resentment is trying to teach us
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Body image during pregnancy
You can watch the recording of this conversation on our YouTube channel HERE.
When you or your loved ones' relationship to faith shifts, it can feel as though the world is collapsing beneath you.
Because, in a very real sense, it is.
When we are early in our development (which most of us are) our primary concern is feeling a sense of safety and then belonging in our social groups. So when our thinking no longer aligns with our faith community (or family, or spouse), it pushes on the very question of who we are and whether or not we still belong in our group.
These are uncomfortable questions but ones that are fundamental to our moral and spiritual growth.
When we are courageous enough to sort out our own relationship with faith and God we can forge a better internal compass and a deeper relationship to our own integrity. It is in our willingness to live honestly, even when we risk disappointing others, that we can develop a faith robust enough to withstand the complexities of living and loving in an imperfect world.
During this hopeful discussion, Dr. Finlayson-Fife addressed questions from her audience about faith development, how to find peace when our thinking doesn't align with our group, and how our understanding of faith and relationship to spirituality can change over the course of a lifetime.
You can watch the recording of this discussion HERE.
Save $100 on The Art of Loving Retreat!
This week, we are rereleasing one of our most popular episodes of all time! In the episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Steve and James of the Unashamed Unafraid Podcast for a deep dive into the complexities of relationships, particularly those in which there has been dishonesty or infidelity in the past.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
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Dishonesty in marriage
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Rebuilding trust after betrayal
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Understanding compulsive sexual behavior
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Honesty and accountability in relationships
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Male sexuality
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The problem with perfectionism
Join us for our 2024 Couples' Retreat! Save $200 with code JFF!
Dr. Finlayson-Fife was invited by Mormon Women for Ethical Government (MWEG) to speak on how we can maintain hope and foster healthy relationships during a time of deep political polarization.
In the presentation, Dr. Finlayson-Fife discusses how we can bridge divides with those who think differently by showing genuine care, listening with humility, and seeking to understand others' experiences, using their perspectives to broaden our own.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife emphasizes that, while we cannot make people think the way we think, we CAN care about each other despite our differences. This connection not only expands our own understanding, but strengthens our ability to work to solve our shared challenges, which is key to thriving in our families, communities, and society
Save $100 on any of our upcoming 2024 events with code LIVE
When we get married, most of us imagine a life full of connection and companionship. But when you feel overlooked, unchosen, or disappointed by how your spouse shows up emotionally or sexually, marriage can start to feel lonely and isolating.
In this hour-long Q&A session, Dr. Finlayson-Fife answers questions from those feeling unchosen, isolated, and disconnected in their most important relationship.
Listen in as Dr. Finlayson-Fife answers the following:
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Is loneliness a normal part of marriage?
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What are reasonable expectations for emotional connection with a spouse?
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How can I create more connection when my spouse doesn’t make any efforts?
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Can an "okay" marriage ever become a passionate one?
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What can I do if I feel unseen, unliked, unappreciated, and unchosen in my marriage?
You can watch the recording of this Q&A session HERE.
JOIN US FOR OUR 2024 COUPLES' RETREAT!
Too often, we enter marriage with expectations of what it will provide for us, without fully understanding the promise we are actually making--to love someone who is dramatically different from us.
When we first fall in love, this seems easy enough but, as we face the difficulties that come when two individuals start the real work of creating a life together, resentment, anger, and even hostility can creep in.
In this NEW episode Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Dan Purcell of the Get Your Marriage On! podcast to answer the question of what it means to really cherish a spouse. Dr. Finlayson-Fife's answer leads to a beautiful discussion on the importance of gratitude, what love is and what it is not, and the impact that deliberate cherishing has in our lives and our relationships. The episode offers practical advice on how to live in gratitude, be more present in relationships, and navigate conflicts with integrity and love.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
- The difference between needing, wanting, and cherishing a spouse
- How marriage reveals our own immaturities
- Why cherishing requires courage
- How to move beyond feelings of resentment and entitlement
- What it means to actively choose your partner
In this NEW episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Rachel Nielsen of the 3 in 30 podcast to discuss three actionable takeaways to help couples become better partners and strengthen their marriages. The discussion covers the important role of self-confrontation in happy relationships, the importance of staying kind and constructive when facing disappointments and differences, and the vital role that sexuality plays in a marital partnership.
Whether you’re struggling in your relationship or simply looking to deepen your connection with your partner, this episode offers valuable perspectives that, when applied, will make a meaningful impact on the way you show up in your marriage.
This powerful conversation just skims the surface on how couples can create a more honest and loving relationship, for a deeper dive, consider enrolling in Dr. Finlayson-Fife's Strengthening Your Relationship course. Or, better yet, join us for our upcoming couples' retreat!
Straddling / Indecision is one of the new losing strategies introduced in the 2024 Strengthening Your Relationship course update! Learn more HERE!
When the path ahead is uncertain, taking a step forward can feel daunting.
So much so that in the face of a difficult choice, many of us become paralyzed with indecision. We delude ourselves into thinking that with more time or with more information we will make the “right” decision. The one that won’t be painful. The one that won’t lead to regret.
While gathering information is an important part of the decision making process, refusing to choose is, paradoxically a choice, and one that is driven by fear, not courage.
In this powerful Q&A session, Dr. Finlayson-Fife took questions from her audience about indecision / straddling. The discussion that followed was a beautiful exploration of vulnerability, fear, finitude, and the importance of claiming our choices in life and in marriage.
We've got a lot of incredible events on the calendar, click HERE to learn more (and SAVE $200 on the Art of Desire Retreat w/code DESIRE)!
In this episode (originally published in 2022), Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Kattie Mount to discuss the different types of events she offers, and why these events can be so transformative, even for those who have already taken the online courses.
If you've been curious about what it is like to attend one of Dr. Jennifer's in-person events, you don't want to miss this episode of Marriage on a Tightrope!
Listen to learn more about:
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Why in-person events are such a powerful way to learn the principles taught by Dr. Finlayson-Fife
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What you can expect if you attend an in-person retreat alone or with your spouse
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If retreats are appropriate for post-Mormons and couples in mixed-faith marriages
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A breakdown of the material covered during each of Dr. Finlayson-Fife's upcoming retreats
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The stages of sexual development (and why sex gets better with age!)
LABOR DAY SALE - ALL COURSES B1G150% OFF
The all encompassing nature of motherhood makes it difficult for many women to stay connected to their identity outside of that role. But when we lose touch with ourselves and our individual desires, we disconnect from an important source of internal strength, one that can sustain us throughout even the most difficult periods of motherhood.
In this NEW episode of Moving Thru Momlife, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins host Lindsey Taylor to discuss how women can stay connected to their bodies, desires, and sexuality throughout every age and stage of motherhood and how maintaining this important connection will provide them with a much-needed source of strength.
If you enjoyed this episode, you would LOVE Dr. Finlayson-Fife's Art of Desire Retreat -- we still have a few tickets left! Click HERE for more information.
Despite their reactions to our attempts to discuss it, our children are looking to us to help them make sense of their sexuality.
And while the prospect of talking to kids about sex can feel daunting, these conversations—no matter how imperfect—make it clear to our children that we care about them, are invested in their wellbeing, and can handle discussing difficult topics with them.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Andee Martineau of the Connect Method Parenting Podcast to share valuable insights on how parents can foster an ongoing, healthy, and honest dialogue with their children about sex and how doing so will empower them to make informed, confident, and integrity-driven choices around sexuality. For a deeper exploration on these topics, enroll in Dr. Finlayson-Fife's recently updated How to Talk to Your Kids About Sex course!
Dr. Finlayson-Fife will also be discussing this topic at the upcoming Restore Conference-- CLICK HERE and use code RESTORE20 to save!
*JOIN US for the 2024 Art of Desire Retreat!*
You can’t change what you can’t see.
And Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s Art of Desire course was created to help women SEE and understand the cultural messaging that has shaped their relationships to themselves, their sexuality, and to God in both positive and negative ways.
In this NEW episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Kattie Mount of the Marriage on a Tightrope Podcast to discuss the upcoming Safely Gathered Retreat, where she will be addressing some of the limiting messages that many women have received and offering a new and expansive perspective, one that invites them to create a stronger, more sustaining relationship with themselves, their desires, and their sexuality.
Join us for a FULL DAY of learning from Dr. Finlayson-Fife on September 5th at the Safely Gathered Retreat -- Get your ticket HERE and save $10 with code JFF10!
Join us for Restore 2024! Get your Ticket HERE. [Save 20% with code: RESTORE20]
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Last year, Dr. Finlayson-Fife gave an unforgettable presentation on Eros and the Light of Christ. Today we are releasing that presentation in podcast form for all to enjoy!
During the presentation, Dr. Finlayson-Fife explores the connection between spirituality and sexuality, and explains how eros energy (the root of romantic love) invites us to transcend ourselves and grow in our spiritual and relational capacity, even in the face of disappointment and uncertainty.
Toward the end of the podcast episode, you will hear the audio of a short film about Geniel Fife (Jennifer's mother), you can watch the full film HERE.
We hope to see you this year at Restore!
Want to hear the FULL episode? Subscribe to Room for Two!
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After twenty years in a difficult marriage, Jack asked Diane for a divorce.
Diane felt conflicted in response. Part of her was devastated. She had committed to Jack and took that commitment seriously. Never a quitter, she had been determined to stay the course in their marriage, despite the difficulty. But part of her also felt relief at the idea. Their marriage had been an exhausting one, and the thought of stepping away from a decades-long struggle was liberating.
After the initial disorganization of the request, Diane settled herself and realized that, even if the marriage ended, her life would go on. She would be okay. But, as empowering as this realization was, it was in facing the real possibility of losing the marriage that she recognized just how much she actually wanted to CHOOSE the marriage. To choose Jack. As difficult as their relationship had been, Diane was waking up to just how much she wanted to work out a life WITH Jack.
With renewed commitment, Jack and Diane have been making progress in recent months. Jack has been more open and honest, and Diane has been working to untangle her thoughts from Jack's and to clarify her own desires.
Both Jack and Diane want a better sexual relationship, but Diane worries that their differing definitions of "better" might be a dealbreaker for Jack.
In this episode of Room for Two, Dr. Finlayson-Fife helps Jack and Diane explore and better understand their sexual dynamic. They discuss Diane’s initial excitement about sex, how their honeymoon’s brief difficulties fractured her perception of her sexual self, and how her initial self criticism has continued to impact their sexual dynamic. Dr. Finlayson-Fife helps Diane see that despite her recent growth, her continued focus on pleasing Jack is standing in the way of her actually loving him. Dr. Finlayson-Fife teaches that the key to moving forward is for Diane to decide who she wants to be in her life and marriage, independent of the expectations of others.
Learning that your spouse has been keeping important truths from you is extraordinarily disruptive.
It can be difficult for couples to know how to navigate forward in the aftermath of a disclosure or discovery of this type of deception, but Dr. Finlayson-Fife has stabilizing resources available to help.
During this Q&A session, Dr. Finlayson-Fife addressed questions from her audience on the topic of intimate deception (including emotional or physical infidelity, pornography use, financial deception, etc.).
If you are interested in learning more about this topic, consider purchasing Dr. Finlayson-Fife's newest mini-course Understanding Intimate Deception.
JOIN Dr. Finlayson-Fife at the 2024 Restore Conference -- Get Your Ticket HERE!
We are all pretty open books, whether or not we want to be.
Those around us, including our children, have an incredible ability to map our minds. They “track” our actions, body language, facial expressions, and tone to understand our emotions, beliefs, and values, including our investment in them. In fact, the majority of our communication happens at this non-verbal level.
What we say matters, of course, but the meaning of what we are saying comes from far more than just the words we speak.
In this new episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Heidi Benjaminson of the Confidence Coaching podcast to discuss mind mapping in parent-child relationships. They explore what our kids are mapping about us, how these mapped messages influence their perceptions and behaviors, and what we can do if course correction is needed.
FATHER'S DAY SALE! | Save 20% on The Art of Loving
In celebration of Father's Day, we are re-releasing this popular episode from the archive!
During this Q&A discussion, Dr. Jennifer discusses the complexities of men's sexuality, particularly within the context of LDS cultural dynamics. The discussion, driven by questions submitted by our Facebook Group members, highlights the pressures and expectations men face, the importance of seeing men's sexuality as a positive force rather than a problematic one, and how couples can create real intimacy in their marriages.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
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Masculine and Feminine Energies
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Sexuality and Morality
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Intimacy in Marriage
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Challenges in Emotional Connection
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Navigating Sexual Desire Discrepancies
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The Impact of Pornography on Relationships
*Self-Respect and Intimacy
If you found this podcast episode helpful, you would LOVE taking Dr. Finlayson-Fife's The Art of Loving course for men! In this course, Dr. Finlayson-Fife will be unpacking the damaging messages our culture has offered to men about masculinity and sexuality and then discussing how men can move forward and create a healthier relationship with themselves, a more balanced relationship with their sexuality, and a more fulfilling sexual connection with their spouse. You can learn more about this course HERE.
To participate in future Q&A sessions, join our Facebook Group HERE.
Want to come and learn The Art of Loving in person? Join us in St. George this fall! Click HERE for information.
In this NEW episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife takes questions from her Facebook Group members on the nuanced and delicate topic of loss of attraction in marriage. In the discussion, Dr. Finlayson-Fife discusses how habituation, boredom, and resentment can undermine attraction, and how gratitude, appreciation, and novelty can foster it.
She also expertly responds to questions like:
- What can I do if I was never attracted to my spouse?
- My spouse has developed self-destructive habits that are impacting my attraction, how can I address this?
- I am disappointed by certain aspects of my spouse's appearance, what can I do?
- I am physically attracted to my spouse, but their personality is unappealing, what can I do?
- My spouse is apathetic about their health / hygeine, how can I address this?
- Can I rekindle the attraction for my spouse that I once had?
You can watch the recording of this conversation HERE!
In this conversation, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Dr. Julie Hanks to discuss her dissertation research, the ways that church culture has shaped women's sexuality, and how women can create a healthier relationship with desire, embodiment, and sexuality (no matter what stage of life they are in).
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
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The importance of agency and self-definition in sexual relationships
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Characteristics of fulfilling sexual relationships
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Balancing personal desires with cultural expectations
*The relationship between agency and desire
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Encouraging self-definition in our children
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The effects of childhood sexual abuse on adult sexuality
If you would like to learn more about these topics, consider enrolling in Dr. Finlayson-Fife's Art of Desire course for women!
You can watch the video of this conversation HERE.
It’s tempting for us to use our children’s successes or failures to measure OUR success as parents.
But tangling ourselves up with our children this way is not only a recipe for disappointment and frustration (on both sides), it also stands in the way of REALLY loving and accepting our children for who they are.
The sooner we recognize how little control we actually have over our children, the sooner we can let go of the fantasy that they prove or disprove our sufficiency (and the sooner we can get to work ACTUALLY loving them). To love our children is to see and value them for the unique individuals they are and offer our best to them.
As humbling and refining of a practice parenting is, it is even more so for those who face the unique challenges and gifts of raising a child with special needs.
In this NEW episode of Navigating the Spectrum, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Michelle Portlock to discuss her personal experience with parenting a neurodivergent child. The discussion covers the importance of compassion (for yourself, your spouse, your child, and your circumstances), and thoughts about how parents can work together to reduce anxiety / stress, improve communication, and foster a nurturing, supportive relationship with each other and their child(ren).
You can learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife's How to Talk To Your Kids About Sex Course HERE
In this NEW episode, Dr. Finlayson-Finlayson-Fife uses questions from her Facebook Group members to drive an important discussion about emotional infidelity. During the conversation, Dr. Finlayson-Fife explains why emotional affairs are so compelling, the impact they have on relationships, and how those who have experienced emotional infidelity can navigate forward wisely.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
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Intimacy Avoidance
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Self-Deception
- Intimacy vs Closeness
- Important considerations post-disclosure
- Trust vs Trustworthiness
If you are interested in learning more about this topic, consider enrolling in Dr. Finlayson-Fife's newest mini-course Understanding Intimate Deception.
Meaningful connection with others is what gives us an important network of support and sustenance throughout our lives; however, creating and maintaining this type of connection isn't always easy.
And these days it is easier than ever to avoid the work of connection by distracting ourselves with screens.
Access to the entire world in the palms of our hands has tremendous benefits, of course, but all too often we use technology as a way to escape our lives and relationships. As nice as it sounds to not face difficult realities head-on, when we avoid, we limit our growth and ability to connect with others.
It’s very challenging to find the middle ground—to use technology to enrich and expand our lives, but to not be indulgent with it. And, as difficult as it is to manage this balance for ourselves, it is even more challenging to help our teens achieve a balanced, informed, and beneficial relationship with screens.
In this NEW episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife discusses with Crystal (@theparenting coach) how parents can help their children navigate the complicated online world. She discusses the key to empowering teens to make wise decisions lies in facilitating our children’s self-authoring – of thinking about the lives they want to create and assessing whether their actions are in line with the person they hope to become.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
- The impact of pornography, social media, and screen use on the developing brain, relationships, and self-esteem
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The importance of normalizing sexual development (especially the draw of sexual imagery)
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Tools for creating and maintaining healthy screen habits (for teens and parents!)
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How parental coddling limits development
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Tips for approaching difficult conversations without fear and shame.
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Discussing healthy sexuality with teens in a shame-free and productive way
For a deeper dive on this topic on self-authoring and healthy sexuality, consider enrolling in Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s How to Talk to Your Kids About Sex Course! This powerful course helps parents know how to foster their child’s ability to self-author throughout every age and stage of development!
Making mistakes is a fundamental part of human development.
Many of us were taught that if we followed the rules we could avoid the pain and frustration of making mistakes. And while it is true that leaning on the wisdom of others and making wise decisions can prevent suffering, none of us are exempt from the mistake-making process.
Because making mistakes isn’t an aberration from the plan, it is a process that is foundational to it. Mistakes, by design, are how we learn.
As with all growth, mistake-making is an uncomfortable process. When our choices result in pain and suffering for ourselves or others, we can use the experience to learn and increase our wisdom or we can stay stuck in unproductive regret or simmering resentment.
In this powerful discussion, Dr. Finlayson-Fife teases out the difference between regret, resentment, and remorse and offers clarity on what these unpleasant emotions can teach us about ourselves and the way we are showing up in our lives and relationships.
You can watch the recording of conversation HERE.
You can learn more about Room for Two, Dr. Finlayson-Fife's couples' coaching podcast, HERE.
Learn more about Dr. Jennifer's How to Talk to Your Kids About Sex Course HERE
When we need the validation of our spouse, we severely limit our ability to be collaborative partners and parents.
Growth and collaboration require a willingness to set our egos aside enough to consider differing perspectives and uncomfortable truths about ourselves. When our ego runs the show, we care more about proving we are right than working together to find a shared solution.
In this NEW conversation with Crystal of The Parenting Coach Podcast, Dr. Finlayson-Fife discusses how we can create healthier, more collaborative partnerships even when our partner is not invested in creating positive change.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
- Resentment and what it can teach us
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The power of gratitude
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Navigating disagreements with wisdom and maturity
The problem with validation seeking
Improving relationships unilaterally
* How to talk to children about sexuality / pornography
You can learn more about Crystal HERE.
Get Your FREE Ticket to the Raising a Happy, Healthy Teen Digital Summit HERE
TJ and Ashley’s story is a familiar one for many.
Their marriage started out happily enough. They were young college students and enjoyed each other a lot during their first few years together. But things changed when TJ started graduate school during an economic downturn. TJ felt a tremendous amount of anxiety about his financial future, given the dim prospects for most students at the time. Competition was fierce and in TJ’s determination to ensure his family’s economic stability, he dedicated himself to his studies, leaving little time or emotional bandwidth for anything else, including Ashley.
This period of limited connection was difficult for Ashley, and it persisted long after graduate school and into TJ’s high-demand career. While disappointed at first, eventually Ashley shifted her focus away from the marriage and created a comfortable, happy, and fulfilling life as a friend and mother.
To the outsider, TJ and Ashley’s relationship may look idyllic–TJ excelling professionally, Ashley busily involved with friends and her community, both invested and caring parents– but their marriage is much more brittle than meets the eye. Resentment and hostility have been simmering under the surface for more than a decade with TJ feeling unappreciated and unacknowledged for the sacrifices he has made to provide for his family and Ashley feeling neglected and unnoticed (except when TJ is wanting sexual attention).
In this episode of Room for Two, Dr. Finlayson-Fife helps the couple think through the long term trajectory of their marriage and how they are undermining their current and future happiness by functioning in such a non-collaborative way. She helps Ashley see the rejection that permeates her interactions with TJ and teaches that the path forward is to stop walling and avoiding and to start looking honestly at herself, her real desires for the relationship, and her role in the lack of intimacy in the marriage.
Be sure to subscribe to Room for Two TODAY to listen to the full episode!
JOIN US IN AUSTIN for the Art of Desire Workshop!
The process of developing our psychological muscles isn’t all that different from the process of developing our physical muscles.
Both are difficult.
Both involve discomfort.
Both require time, persistence, and patience.
And both are easiest when we have a motivation that propels us through the discomfort.
Fear, self-hatred, and compliance with external expectations are poor motivators. Living according to our higher selves and striving to embody what we value are much stronger motivators!
Our ability to grow, develop, and live in line with our higher selves hinges upon our willingness to look truthfully at ourselves and our circumstances, and make choices from a deeper internal authority.
In this NEW episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Amber Brueseke of Biceps After Babies Radio to discuss the important role that self-honesty and self-definition play in our relationship to our bodies as well as in our emotional, spiritual, and relational development.
JOIN US for the Art of Desire Workshop in Austin, TX! Click HERE for more information!
In this NEW episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife takes questions from her audience about desire dynamics and the unique challenges faced by both the higher-desire spouse and the lower-desire spouse. In the discussion Dr. Finlayson-Fife discusses how couples can work together to create a more collaborative dynamic and what to do if only one spouse is interested in addressing the desire discrepancy.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
- Difficult Conversations
- Dealing with Disappointment
- Accommodation vs Choosing
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Power Struggles in Marriage
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The Pursuer / Distancer dynamic
- Addressing conflict with honesty and compassion
If you would like to learn more about this topic, consider enrolling in Dr. Finlayson-Fife's Enhancing Sexual Intimacy course!
It has been said that our brains are our most important sexual organs and, it's true--the meanings that are playing out in our minds either consciously or under the surface have a big impact on our sexual experiences.
Meanings that expand our sense of self and make us feel alive (like freedom and choice) increase our desire, while meanings that constrict us (like obligation and shame) shut down our desire and kill any chance of us having a passionate, fulfilling experience.
Recently, I joined Tammy Hill of the Live Your Why Podcast to discuss the meanings that keep many of us from fully experiencing the joy of our sexuality and what we can do to shift these common, but problematic meaning frames and create something better.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
- Reconciling spirituality and sexuality
- The importance of freedom and choice
- Problematic meaning frames
- The art of surrender / receiving
For a deeper dive on working through problematic meanings around sexuality, consider enrolling in Dr. Finlayson-Fife's Enhancing Sexual Intimacy course!
Choosing to love with your whole heart means accepting the risk of disappointment, loss, and grief.
These difficult realities come in many forms throughout a lifetime—unmet expectations, unfulfilled hopes and dreams, shifts in belief, broken promises, illness, and ultimately, death.
Facing acute loss is a harrowing and sobering experience, in part because it wakes us up to just how little control we have over our circumstances. But being compassionate towards ourselves in the process and finding the courage to keep moving forward, even when the path is riddled with uncertainty and vulnerability, is a beautiful form of faith. When we take the disappointment and loss that life hands us and use our difficult experiences to become kinder, more compassionate people, we increase our ability to deeply cherish the good around us, and we increase our capacity for joy.
This NEW episode is the audio from a Q&A session that Dr. Finlayson-Fife hosted on the topic of loss and grief. During the conversation, Dr. Finlayson-Fife took questions about all different types of losses including miscarriage, death, broken promises, and frustrated expectations.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
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Intimacy after loss
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Mixed-faith marriages
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Intimacy after miscarriage
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Finding the courage to reinvest in life after loss
You can watch the full recording of this Q&A session HERE.
You can learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife's new mini-courses HERE.
We have a cultural stereotype about masculinity that can often make us blind to the challenges and self-doubt that many men grapple with in regards to their sexuality.
While men and women may express their anxieties about sexuality differently, the truth is that men have just as difficult of a time coming to peace with their sexuality as women do.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Tammy Hill of the Live Your Why Podcast for a discussion on masculinity and how our cultural messaging has impacted men’s ability to accept themselves as sexual beings.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
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Sexual shame
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Performance anxiety
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Desire discrepancies
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Masturbation and Pornography
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Erectile dysfunction
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Being tolerated vs. being received sexually
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Creating more intimate relationships
If you found this episode helpful and want to learn more, consider enrolling in Dr. Finlayson-Fife's Art of Loving course for men!
Conflict is a natural outgrowth of two people trying to forge a life together and it presents a remarkable opportunity for growth if we allow it.
When we disagree with our spouse, we often go to behaviors that lead to hurt and frustration rather than making a concerted effort to engage often counter-intuitive, but more productive and collaborative responses.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins relationship coach Anne Nelson to discuss how relationships can grow and flourish, even in the face of conflict and difference.
Listen to the episode to learn more about:
- The losing strategies we instinctively use in our relationships
- The growth opportunity provided through conflict in marriage
- How to handle differences with greater maturity and wisdom
This interview is also available on our YouTube channel HERE.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife's Strengthening Your Relationship teaches strategies for growing into deeper integrity, deeper honesty, and deeper courage in your life and relationship. The principles in the course will help you address conflict more constructively and show you how to create a marriage where two people can thrive both together and independently. You can learn more about this marriage-revolutionizing course HERE.
Join us for the Strengthening Your Relationship WEBINAR! Class starts on Friday, click HERE for your ticket!
Feeling united in marriage is a big deal, and when your worldview has too little overlap with your spouse’s, it can create a sense of loneliness and even despair.
The temptation in this scenario is to try to convince your spouse to see things the “right” way (i.e. your way!). But, when we do this, we set ourselves up for a lifelong power struggle and a relationship unlikely to find common ground.
On the other hand, earnestly seeking to understand your spouse’s point of view–how they see the world and why it makes sense to them–is an essential practice. Rather than demand validation of your own beliefs, seeking first to genuinely understand is a powerful skill. It opens both partners up to deeper understanding of each other and even if there isn’t “agreement” there is at a minimum more ability to work more collaboratively with differing views.
I recently joined Elisa Fucci of the Elisa Fucci Show to discuss how couples can navigate their differences with wisdom and maturity, and how doing so can lead to not only finding common ground in a mixed-faith marriage, but finding higher ground.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
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Creating a collaborative marriage
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Losing strategies and how they keep us stuck in frustrating dynamics
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The gift of dual perspectives
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Staying connected during disagreements
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Parenting in a mixed-faith family
🌲Don't Miss Our CHRISTMAS SALE--Save 20% (OR MORE) on ALL of Dr. Finlayson-Fife's full-length online courses!🌲
Several weeks ago, Dr. Finlayson-Fife invited Thomas McConkie to join her and Room for Two annual subscribers for an interactive discussion about embodiment, vulnerability, and the power of mindfulness. This week, we are publishing the recording of this rich and meaningful conversation for ALL to enjoy.
Thomas McConkie is an author, developmental researcher, and mindfulness teacher. He is the founder of the Lower Lights School of Wisdom, a supportive and vibrant community focused on adult development and healing divisions through bridging religious/secular divides. Thomas has a passion for the world's Wisdom traditions, was raised as a Latter-day Saint, and has a deep Christian faith infused with nearly 25 years of Buddhist practice.
Thomas's newly released book, At-ONE-Ment, offers a beautiful exploration of ancient and modern approaches to awakening the mind, purifying the heart, and healing the body. You can learn more about Thomas and his work by clicking HERE.
If you would like to take part in future live discussions like this one, subscribe to Room for Two today!
We have lots of exciting announcements (including 2024 event tickets), read all about them HERE
Egodystonic. Enmeshment. Sense-of-self. Differentiation.
These words and the ideas they represent can be unfamiliar and even downright intimidating when you first start listening to Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s podcasts and courses--it can sometimes feel like learning an entirely new language! But, as with learning any new language, the more you immerse yourself by listening and learning, the more clear these transformative concepts will become.
In this NEW podcast episode, Sherrae Phelps interviews Dr. Finlayson-Fife about her unique approach to coaching and what sets this approach apart from others. Throughout the episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife breaks down many of the phrases and concepts that are central to differentiation theory and her work, and goes on to discuss why these concepts are so powerful and effective for those looking to grow in their capacity to love.
Whether you are new to her content or have been here a while, this episode is a helpful listen for anyone who wants a more concrete understanding of differentiation theory and the uncomfortable process of human development and relational change.
Download the Finlayson-Fife App HERE!
As distressing as midlife can feel sometimes, it's a season full of potential.
It’s the time when, if all goes well, we start to realize that our attempts to earn our value and prove our lovability to others have been not only been exhausting, but also fruitless.
It’s the time when we shift our focus from pleasing others to living in alignment with what we actually believe is best. And as a result, we make greater efforts to live in a way where we can feel at peace with ourselves, our choices, and the impact that our actions have on those around us.
When we can see midlife for what it is, a period of soul-stretching and important growth, we will be able to better tolerate the inevitable ups and downs that come along with it.
This NEW podcast episode is the recording of a live Q&A that Dr. Finlayson-Fife held for members of her Facebook Community. During the discussion, Dr. Finlayson-Fife took questions from the group about midlife and how we can navigate these often disillusioning middle years with clarity, wisdom, and hope.
This conversation is also available on YouTube, you can watch it HERE.
As parents, we are hardwired to focus on our child’s wellbeing. Early on, this inclination serves our children well but, as they grow, if our relationship with them doesn’t evolve to make room for their emerging autonomy, we will keep them from developing the capacities they need to flourish in adulthood and navigate the increasingly complex world around them.
As scary as it is to step back and watch as our children take more ownership of their lives and choices, and as hard as it is to watch their inevitable missteps along the way, doing so is fundamental to their growth and development.
In this NEW podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Tom Telford, Liza Telford, and Preston Niederhauser, hosts of the BrainSTOKE podcast, to give parents helpful guidance on how they can be loving, wise mentors as their children stumble through the sometimes turbulent transition into adulthood.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
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Fostering your child’s capacity to self-author
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Fitting in vs belonging
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Establishing guardrails for our kids and knowing when and how to adjust those guardrails
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Overcoming resentment about our own lack of self-authoring
Room for Two HALLOWEEN SALE | Click HERE for $79 subscriptions!
In this special Halloween episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Jeff & Cathy of the LILY POD podcast to discuss why intimacy can be so terrifying, how we can overcome these fears, and the benefits that await those who are courageous enough to really care, know, and understand themselves and others.
Jeff & Cathy are co-authors of the Amazon best-seller Intentional Courtship: A Mid-Singles Guide to Peace, Progress, and Pairing Up in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.Together they founded Love in Later Years (LILY) which serves and supports single adults seeking peace, healing, and more joyful relationships. Jeff and Cathy are both Advanced Certified Life Coaches and each hold Bachelors' degrees in Family & Human Development.
Last month, Dr. Adam Miller joined Dr. Finlayson-Fife and Room for Two subscribers for an interactive discussion about love and loss.
The conversation was simply too incredible to keep contained on the Room for Two podcast, so we are releasing it here today on Conversations with Dr. Jennifer for EVERYONE to enjoy. This beautiful exchange of ideas between Dr. Finlayson-Fife and Dr. Miller will change the way you think about love in the best possible way.
Dr. Adam Miller is a professor of philosophy at Collin College in McKinney, Texas. He earned a BA in Comparative Literature from Brigham Young University and an MA and PhD in Philosophy from Villanova University.
He is the author of over ten books, including “Letters to a Young Mormon” and “Original Grace”, he serves as the current director of the Mormon Theology seminar. You can learn more about Adam and his work HERE.
If you would like to take part in future conversations like this one, consider subscribing to Room for Two!
This podcast episode discusses the Zack and Kelly series, found on Dr. Finlayson-Fife's Room for Two podcast. You can listen to a portion of the first episode of the series without a subscription HERE.
Bumping up against the limits of our time, energy, and resources is one of life’s greatest frustrations.
As noble as our intentions and aspirations may be, we all are forced to prioritize how we will spend our finite time and resources in the face of limitless demands and opportunities. Recognizing our personal and professional limitations and being deliberate in the choices we make, allows us to bring our best selves to our careers, families, and lives in general.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Dr. Dave and Ashley of the On Call with Dr. Dave podcast to talk through the impact of high-demand careers on relationships and the important role that self-awareness, honest communication, and conscious choosing play in keeping resentment and entitlement at bay.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
- Collaboration and partnership
- Important factors to discuss before pursuing a high-demand career while in a relationship
- Combating entitlement and resentment
- Keeping play and eroticism alive in marriage
Click HERE to learn more about Room for Two!
The 2023 Restore Conference (a Faith Matters Gathering) is just around the corner! This year, Dr. Finlayson-Fife will be presenting on Eros energy and how this expansive, transformative, and transcendent energy is connected to our spirituality.
Today we are releasing the recording of Dr. Finlayson-Fife's 2022 Restore presentation, "Developing Sexual Wholeness." In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife discusses the integration of spirituality and sexuality from an LDS theological perspective. She also walks through the three stages of development (Egocentric, Social, and Self-Authoring) and how each developmental stage shapes how we think about ourselves, our sexuality, and God.
You can watch the video of this presentation HERE.
In this recent Facebook Live, Zach and Darcy Spafford of the Thrive Beyond Pornography podcast joined Dr. Finlayson-Fife to share their personal experience working through unwanted pornography use in their marriage and how after years of feeling stuck and frustrated, they were able to shift gears and make meaningful, lasting progress in their relationship to pornography and their relationship to each other.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
- Self-authoring and the importance of claiming your life and choices
- The problem with compliance/defiance framing
- Role-based marriage vs choice-based marriage
- Eroticism in marriage
- Approaching difficult conversations with curiosity
A recording of this conversation is also available on our YouTube channel.
In this NEW podcast episode, I join Aubrey and Tim Chaves from the Faith Matters podcast to talk about modesty and how we can relate to and cherish our bodies so as to experience deeply embodied joy through them.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
Problematic understandings of modesty
Why modesty is such a culturally charged topic
Sexual self-mastery
Healthy ways to talk to youth about modesty and sexuality
Stages of moral development
The gift of sexual conservatism
In this NEW podcast episode, I join Heather Frazier of the Pivot Parenting Podcast to talk about triangulation in families and the negative impact that triangulation has on our children and our marriages.
Listen to the full episode to learn:
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What triangulation is and why it is so tempting
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The three classic roles in triangled relationships—victim, perpetrator, and rescuer (and how we toggle between roles at different times)
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How to distinguish between healthy triangles and unhealthy ones
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How triangulation is related to codependency
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How to break the pattern of triangulation when it’s undermining your relationships
In this NEW podcast episode [“Differentiation and Divorce”], Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Hyo North of the Leading With Grace podcast to talk about how differentiation can help those working through the complexities of separation or divorce navigate forward with wisdom and maturity.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
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Separation and divorce
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Collusive alliances and how they keep us stuck
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Differentiation as it relates to divorce
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Forgiveness
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Forging capacity in the face of crisis
In this NEW podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Rhonda Farr to talk through two listener questions about desire dynamics and how to navigate the painful reality of having a spouse who is not interested in creating a better sexual relationship.
During this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife expertly models how the higher desire partner can maturely handle themselves in difficult and productive conversations about sexuality.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
-Desire Dynamics -Duty Sex -Differentiation -Emotional and Sexual Maturity
In this NEW podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Sadi Rogers of Lift + Love to discuss the unique challenges faced by LGBTQ+ Latter-day Saints and the opportunity in the struggle to forge deeper self-acceptance and sustaining inner strength.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
*Healthy ways to address the discrepancy between societal norms and divergent realities
*Finding peace in painful circumstances
*How love is the pathway to truth
*Communicating effectively with those who believe differently
*Stages of spiritual development
*Grief and loss as inherent to life
*The silver lining that comes from not fitting the mold of a group
TODAY ONLY Save $18 on Room for Two Subscriptions with Code ROOM4TWO!
Zack and Kelly’s marriage has been a relatively untroubled one.
That is until last year, when Zack disclosed to Kelly that he had been viewing pornography off and on since childhood. Kelly’s distress from the disclosure came not so much because Zack had been viewing porn, but because he had managed to keep this from her despite her having asked him explicitly about it over the years. Learning that he was capable of deceiving her in this way was completely and understandably disorganizing for Kelly.
In this NEW podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Dr. Dave and Dr. Liz of the Stronger Marriage Connection podcast to discuss how couples can work through conflict and develop a greater capacity for both sexual and emotional intimacy.
When we take ourselves too seriously, we can snuff out the playful eros energy that keeps relationships vibrant and alive.
After all, the happiest marriages thrive, rather than just survive. They are joyful because each person feels free to fully be themselves—without the need to pretend or contort themselves to earn approval.
Making room for two people to be true to themselves and the relationship is where the real magic happens.
I recently met with Dr. Jerry and Tammie Duggar of the Simple 7 Lifestyle Podcast to discuss how couples can find more happiness and a deeper sense of freedom in their relationships, and how the quality of our relationships impacts both our mental and physical health.
It’s very tempting to look to others to tell us how to live–to gauge our success by how well we live up to others’ expectations and to measure our value by the approval of others.
There is a time for thinking this way; it’s how we all start out—dependent on others to tell us how to live. But, if we want to mature and grow into greater personal responsibility and wisdom, we must be willing to author our own lives.
It’s what maturity requires.
It means having the courage to take our own ideas and the ideas of others and really evaluate them. To determine for ourselves if ideas are good and truthful, and then to align our choices with what we ourselves genuinely believe is best.
Forging a deeper internal reference is critical if we want to be at peace with ourselves and if we want to be capable of intimacy, of letting someone truly know who we are.
I recently joined Oliver and Lindsey of the Singled In Podcast for a conversation about the exceptional power of choice and its relationship to self-authoring, especially as it relates to being at peace with our sexuality.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
-Shifting from an external to an internal moral compass
- Psychological maturation
-Self-authoring and self-determination
-The power of CHOICE
-How relationships pressure growth
-Sexual integration for singles
I am heartbroken to share with you on this Mother’s Day that recently my mom was diagnosed with a serious illness. An illness that will take her from us sooner than any of us had expected.
Sherrae Phelps and I recorded this podcast episode last year, long before my mom’s diagnosis. The plan was always to publish the episode for Mother’s Day, but it feels particularly poignant to be releasing it now, in light of this diagnosis–to be celebrating my mother’s impact on me as I confront the reality of losing her.
I am so grateful for my kind-hearted and generous mother.
When I was young, it seemed to me that my mom had less influence than my dad (he was a professor, a church leader, and had a more dominant voice in our family). But, over time, I have come to see and appreciate just how influential my mom has been—not only in my life but in the lives of countless others.
My mom has the tremendous gift of being able to see the good in others. She genuinely cares about people and easily celebrates them for who they are, however divergent their backgrounds and beliefs may be. Throughout my childhood, my mom would welcome those who were in need of friendship or support into her life. It wasn’t uncommon for us to have visitors staying at our house or sitting around our dinner table. Caring for others comes easily to my mom—the genuine friendship and acceptance that she offers has blessed the lives of so many.
Because of my mom’s ability to see the good in others, it has always been clear to me and to each of my seven siblings that we are cherished by her. She relates to us as gifts in her life and believes that we are inherently worthy (even when we have been sure she was mistaken). She never tried to turn us into anything different than who we were—she didn’t pressure us to be people who would make her proud. She was already proud of us, just for being hers. Having a parent value me so unequivocally fostered a belief in myself early on. Through the way that she has lived, she has taught me to care for others and to trust in a God who loves and accepts me, even when others may not.
Although an unassuming person, my mom has always been determined to create a meaningful life. Consistent with her focus on the Good, she’s an optimist, one who looks towards possibilities. For example, in her seventies, she started a raw vegan snack food business; at age 89, she signed up for ballroom dance classes–even though doing so terrified her–and she has danced nearly every day since. Lately, she has been focused on improving her German and studies it regularly. She is always trying to expand her life. And even in the face of a devastating diagnosis, Mom has remained hopeful and resolved to live every remaining moment wholeheartedly and without despair.
The truth is, my behind-the-scenes mother has had a tremendous positive impact on the world. She has spread her influence by living wisely and through her honest care for others. This disposition has been supported by her faith which has asked her to love others and to live hopefully.
At ninety years old, she is a woman full of life and genuine beauty–she exemplifies feminine radiance and intuitive wisdom. Her life has demonstrated that the power of love, humility, and grace can make the world a better place. I am so grateful for her–grateful for her influence on me and on others. Grateful that she is who she is, and that she has shown up in her life the way that she has. She has given me so much.
Thank you, Mom. I love you so very much.
Click HERE to subscribe to Dr. Finlayson-Fife's Room for Two podcast!
The challenges in your sexual relationship can offer a glimpse into the unhealthy dynamics playing out in your life and marriage.
Understanding and addressing your role in these difficult interactions will help you create an intimate relationship that can be a place of solace for both parties—where each partner feels desired, valued, and cared for. In this new podcast episode, I join Melissa of the Family Brand podcast to discuss our ability to find fulfillment in sexual relationships and how couples can overcome common roadblocks that interfere with desire, passion, and connection.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
• Meanings that interfere with desire and sexual connection
• Becoming more capable of desire and connection in marriage
• Navigating intimacy during every phase of marriage—from newlywed to empty nest
• Balancing our need for autonomy with our need for connection (making room for two in marriage)
• Self-authoring and its relationship to desire
• Increasing eroticism and connection with our partners
Click HERE to learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife's Enhancing Sexual Intimacy course
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Jordan and Ryan of The Stoic Dad podcast to discuss stoicism, desire, productive suffering, mature masculinity, and more!
Click HERE to learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife's Room for Two podcast!
The brief years of young adulthood are a vitally important period of our development.
These are the years when we learn how to self-define. A time when we take the ideas and beliefs that were offered to us by parents, peers, and society and really sort out what we think about those ideas, and how we want to relate to them as we go forward.
As most adults will remember, this can be a turbulent process, for both young adults and their parents.
I recently had the opportunity to sit down with Isaac Burton, an incredible young college student, to discuss several topics that are on the minds of young adults. During the conversation, we discuss dating, career choices, the importance of self-definition, and more.
As human beings, we have a strong inner drive to develop, create, learn, and grow. But uncertainty can keep many of us stuck and afraid to start the beautiful and enriching process of developing who we are. And, to be clear, it IS a process. Self-expansion isn’t about meeting metrics or checking off goals. It’s a mindset. It’s about striving, staying open to possibilities, and being courageous enough to tolerate the inevitable bumps along the way.
In this episode, I discuss with Monica Packer the importance of expanding ourselves and how constricting this process and taking refuge in stasis, limits not only our peace with ourselves but also our ability to whole-heartedly love our partner.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about how the courage to grow will impact every aspect of your life, including your intimate relationship.
To learn more about this topic, consider enrolling in my Art of Desire course for women!
Click HERE to learn more about our 2023 Art of Loving Retreat (for men)
In this episode, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Richard Ostler to discuss the experiences in her early life that shaped her personal, professional, and spiritual journey—including her shift from following cultural expectations to following her own heart and desires.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
-Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s personal, professional, and spiritual journey
-Boundaries
-Spiritual Maturity
-Self-Definition
-Obedience vs Integrity
Join us for Dr. Finlayson-Fife's 2023 Art of Desire Retreat
TODAY ONLY you can save $100 on this retreat by using code WD2023 (code expires at 11:59 PM on 3/9/23). Click HERE for your ticket!
If you feel anxious about sexuality, you are definitely not alone.
The trepidation that many of us feel makes a lot of sense, given that most of us got very little guidance about sexuality during our formative years. And the guidance we did get, often came from a place of fear and anxiety–ultimately doing more harm than it did good.
While I am sure that these messages were well intended, they resulted in a lot of fear and confusion, both of which interfere with our ability to accept our bodies and sexuality for what they really are –incredible gifts from our Heavenly Parents.
If we want an intimate connection with a spouse, we have to be at peace with our sexuality. Because If you don’t know your sexual self, you won’t be able to share an intimate connection with another–we can’t share what we don’t have.
The good news is that this is an area in which we can and should grow. It’s not too late. And I assure you that every effort that you make to come to peace with your God-given sexuality will pay incredible dividends in your life and in your marriage.
Recently, I joined Dr. Paul Jenkins of Live on Purpose Radio to discuss the role that peace with our OWN sexuality plays in our ability to create a soulful and sustaining connection with our spouse. In the episode, we discuss several roadblocks that couples face as they try to create sexual and emotional intimacy–these roadblocks are more common than you might think and the good news is that they can be overcome.
You can listen to the full episode to learn more about:
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What REAL intimacy is and how you can create more of it!
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The keys to creating real sexual and emotional intimacy in marriage
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The gift of coming to peace with your own sexuality
JOIN US in Spring City for the 2023 Art of Desire Retreat! Click HERE to learn more
The highest, most beautiful form of our sexuality requires both freedom and discipline.
While freedom and discipline seem like competing ideas, the reality is that they actually work alongside one another. When sexuality goes awry, it can usually be attributed to either excessive freedom or excessive rigidity. Both extremes are anti-spiritual positions that keep sex from becoming the rejuvenating, soul-sustaining experience it has the potential to be.
In this NEW podcast episode, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Tammy Hill of the Live Your Why Podcast to discuss the divine gift of sexuality and the important role that our sexuality plays in our spiritual development.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
*The divine gift of sexuality
*How to create real connection through sexuality
*Theological principles of sexuality and joy
*The important balance of freedom and constraint
*The important connection between sexuality and spirituality
Our Valentine's Day Sale ends TONIGHT! Be sure to CLICK HERE to save 20% on ALL of Dr. Finlayson-Fife's online courses!
In this special Valentine's Day edition of MormonLand, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife, McArthur Krishna, and Bethany Brady Spalding join Peggy Fletcher Stack and David Stack, hosts of the MormonLand Podcast, for a thoughtful discussion on the nature of Latter-day Saint marriages and an exploration of the content found in the recently released ebook "In the Image of Our Heavenly Parents: A Couple's Guide to Creating a More Divine Marriage."
Listen to the full episodes to learn more about how couples can work together to create more heavenly marriages.
You can purchase your copy of the book HERE.
Be sure to use code JENNIFER10 to save $10 at checkout!
*Last chance to get your tickets to Dr. Finlayson-Fife's LIVE webinar series that starts Saturday! Click* HERE for your ticket!*Also, time is running out to take advantage of our Valentine's Day Sale! Click HERE to save on ALL of our online courses!*** Just mentioning masturbation can make many of us uneasy.The word is charged in a way that often elicits fear, shame, and confusion, especially among those of us who grew up in a sexually conservative culture.But, In this NEW podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Dan Purcell of the Get Your Marriage On podcast (@getyourmarriageon) for a deep dive into the topic of masturbation. During the episode, Dr. Jennifer explores the reasons why there is so much anxiety surrounding masturbation and offers insight on what we can do to make decisions around our sexuality that are wise and make us stronger.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
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Helpful ways to think about the topic of masturbation.
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Why labeling masturbation as “right” or “wrong” isn’t as clear as you think
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How you can overcome sexual shame
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Understanding and achieving sexual Integrity
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Increasing intimacy in marriage
Join Dr. Finlayson-Fife for a live and interactive 5 session webinar for parents!
Get your ticket HERE!
Parents who attend this webinar series will be prepared to address the challenging topics of masturbation, pornography, and sexual abuse with their children, and will learn what appropriate, healthy relationships look like at every stage of their child’s development.
Don't miss this incredible opportunity to participate in 5 live sessions with Dr. Finlayson-Fife!
Also, don't forget that ALL of Dr. Finlayson-Fife's incredible online courses are ON SALE for Valentine's Day! Click HERE to learn more!
Human beings are sexual beings from birth. As such, children are naturally and rightfully curious about their growing bodies. While this curiosity and subsequent exploration manifests differently in toddlerhood, childhood, and adolescence--a parent's comfort level with this natural process will have a big impact on the child's relationship with sexuality.
In this popular podcast, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Taralynn of the Find the Magic Podcast to discuss what parents can do to help their children develop a healthy relationship with sexuality.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
- Taking the shame, fear, and anxiety out of talking to kids about sex
- Normalizing sexuality
- Teaching our children to be deliberate and thoughtful in their choices about sexuality
- Handling toddler and pre-adolescent curiosity about embodiment and sexuality
- Modesty
Dr. Finlayson-Fife will be hosting a Facebook Live for singles on January 27th at 12 PM MT, click HERE to join our Facebook Group so you can participate!
When dealing with unwanted porn use or unwelcome sexual feelings, it’s easy to feel victimized by our environment and choices.
But it’s important to know that the way that we frame these behaviors MATTERS.
Certain framing leaves us feeling powerless and that we have little control over our behavior. But when we shift to a more agentic frame and take deeper responsibility for our lives and choices, we open ourselves up to making decisions that are more in line with our higher selves.
In this NEW PODCAST episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Taylor Chambers MS, LMFT to discuss unwanted porn use and how our framing of the behavior can make all the difference. They also discuss how honesty with ourselves and our partner can open us up to more sexual fulfillment and connection.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
- Addiction framing vs Agentic framing
- Sexuality as a mechanism for personal development
- Coming to peace with your sexuality
- Honesty and its role in our relationships
- Positive ways to respond to unwanted sexual thoughts/feelings
- Trust vs Trustworthiness
Join our Facebook Group HERE!
It takes emotional maturity to show up honestly in your life and expose what you really think, feel, and desire–especially when those thoughts and feelings diverge from the norms of your larger social group. The fear of not belonging can keep us from acknowledging who we really are.
In this NEW PODCAST episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Sarah Carter of the Heart and Soul podcast to discuss the complexity of making room for your own thoughts and desires when you also belong to a family or larger group, and how unyielding expectations can interfere with self-acceptance, body acceptance, and honest relationships with others.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
- The importance of acknowledging our honest thoughts and desires
- Perfectionism
- Body Image
- Developing compassion towards our limitations and the limitations of others
- Resentment
CHRISTMAS SALE--ALL of our online courses are 20% off during our Christmas sale! Click HERE to learn more!
In this NEW podcast episode, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins the hosts of the Barbie Does Dating Podcast to discuss dating relationships!
This episode covers how singles can differentiate in their relationships, how to recognize and overcome a fear of commitment, and healthy ways to approach the nuanced topic of sexual intimacy and compatibility in celibate dating relationships.
*ALL courses are 20% during our* Christmas Sale*!*
PLUSRoom for Two Subscriptions are only $79 through Friday!
Loving sexuality in marriage provides a refuge from the suffering and difficulty that is inherent to living.
When sexuality is mature, based in love and acceptance, it has the power to sustain us, rejuvenate our souls, and expand our capacity for joy.
In this NEW PODCAST episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Tammy Hill of the Live Your Why podcast to talk about how we can develop sexual maturity and use our sexuality to create more partnership and connection in our marriages.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
*Female orgasm
*Sexual response cycles for men and women (they’re different!)
*Masturbation and sexual awareness
*Fantasy
*Surrender and pleasure
If you enjoyed this episode and want to learn more, consider enrolling in Dr. Finlayson-Fife's Art of Desire course for women!
In this NEW PODCAST episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Lisa from The Lisa Show (@thelisashow) to discuss red flags within a relationship and how discomfort in relationships can help us grow into more mature and loving partners.
In this episode of Room for Two, Dr. Finlayson-Fife helps Nate and Nora see how they have each handled their fear and anxiety in destructive ways – Nora becoming rigid and Nate turning to condescension. These strategies are compelling because they are an easy escape from the intensity and discomfort of marital growth and expansion. Dr. Finlayson-Fife explains that the path to more stability and connection in their relationship is differentiation – learning to tolerate the aloneness and invalidation that comes when you love someone who sees and experiences the world differently than you do.
In this NEW PODCAST episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Sherrae Phelps and Kristi Bassett for a frank discussion about anxiety. During the episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife offers an important distinction between fear and anxiety and gives practical tips on how we can each learn to better cope with the uncertainties that are inherent to life.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
*Fear vs Anxiety
*How to increase our tolerance for anxiety and uncertainty
*Supporting family members with anxiety
*Anxiety medication
In this NEW PODCAST episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Raini Hamilton to talk about the important role conflict plays in intimate relationships and how couples can use conflict to grow closer together and expand their lives and relationship.
In this NEW podcast episode, Kirsten and Alexis of the Sharing Her Journey podcast (@sharingherjourney) invite Dr. Finlayson- Fife to discuss challenging moments from her earlier years and the impact those challenges have had on her life and career path.
In this NEW podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Ashlynn Mitchell of the This is Ashlynn podcast (@this.isashlynn) to help listeners better recognize how they overfunction and underfunction (that’s right, you may be doing both!) in their marriages and in parenting.
In this NEW PODCAST, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Dr. Cory Allan of the Sexy Mariage Radio Podcast to discuss duty sex and what couples can do to bring more desire, passion, and aliveness to their intimate relationship.
In this NEW PODCAST episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Brecklyn Winder of the Bread and Butter Podcast to discuss the negative meanings that many of us inherited around modesty and sexuality. Dr. Finlayson-Fife goes on to share how we can rethink and reframe those ideas to develop a healthier understanding of both modesty and sexuality.
In this NEW PODCAST episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Brecklyn Winder of the Bread and Butter Podcast to discuss the negative meanings that many of us inherited around modesty and sexuality. Dr. Finlayson-Fife goes on to share how we can rethink and reframe those ideas to develop a healthier understanding of both modesty and sexuality.
In this NEW PODCAST episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Camille Scow of the Choosing Love podcast to talk about the complexities of pornography usage and how you can show love and support to your spouse and yourself in the wake of a pornography disclosure.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
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The important role of self-compassion as we work through fears and anxieties associated with porn usage
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Harmful meanings around pornography that hinder our growth and understanding
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Anger as a positive resource
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The true measure of progress for a porn user
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Trust vs Trustworthiness
In this NEW PODCAST episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Camille Scow of the Choosing Love podcast to talk about the complexities of pornography usage and how you can show love and support to your spouse and yourself in the wake of a pornography disclosure.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
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The important role of self-compassion as we work through fears and anxieties associated with porn usage
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Harmful meanings around pornography that hinder our growth and understanding
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Anger as a positive resource
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The true measure of progress for a porn user
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Trust vs Trustworthiness
In this NEW PODCAST episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Heather Frazier of the Pivot Parenting podcast to talk about the many emotions that can come as parents transition into the empty nest phase of life, and how we can best support our kids as they become more independent and step out into the world.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
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Dealing with the loss of purpose and identity as we transition to the empty nesting phase
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Encouraging confidence and independence in adult children
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Supporting married children to leave and cleave to their partner
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Making room for a new daughter or son-in-law in the family culture
In this NEW PODCAST episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Heather Frazier of the Pivot Parenting podcast to talk about the many emotions that can come as parents transition into the empty nest phase of life, and how we can best support our kids as they become more independent and step out into the world.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
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Dealing with the loss of purpose and identity as we transition to the empty nesting phase
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Encouraging confidence and independence in adult children
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Supporting married children to leave and cleave to their partner
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Making room for a new daughter or son-in-law in the family culture
In this NEW podcast episode, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Sarah Brewer of the Overcome Pornography For Good Podcast to discuss how taking responsibility for your own life and chocies will increase your capacity to love and be loved.
In this NEW podcast episode, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Sarah Brewer of the Overcome Pornography For Good Podcast to discuss how taking responsibility for your own life and chocies will increase your capacity to love and be loved.
In the weeks between their first and second meeting, Dave began showing more genuine interest in Carly and became more protective of their partnership. Carly started to confront her control and punishment towards Dave. The development of both parties resulted in Carly and Dave feeling less resentment towards each other, and Carly feeling greater trust and desire for sexual connection.
Carly and Dave are now hoping to take their physical relationship to the next level, but find themselves hesitant about the sex they desire. Listen to this full-length Room for Two episode to hear Dr. Finlayson-Fife help Carly and Dave confront their complicated relationship to sexual pleasure.
This NEW podcast episode is the recording of Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s recent presentation at a stake women’s conference. During this presentation, she focuses on how we can use conflict and difference to increase our wisdom and create more unity in our families and communities. Dr. Finlayson-Fife also addressed questions from members of the congregation about loving LGBTQ family members, women’s role in the Church, and how to better understand and love family members who leave the church.
In this recent podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joined Dave Noyce and Peggy Fletcher Stack of The Salt Lake Tribune's Mormon Land podcast (@mormonland) to discuss the recent viral "MomTok" video. In this discussion, Jennifer talks about how the lack of strong moral development in individuals can lead to vulnerabilities within a marriage.
In this NEW podcast episode, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins The Cultural Hall Podcast to discuss some of the false traditions that have been passed down through generations and are now being misunderstood as doctrine–topics like patriarchal order within the church and family, Mother in Heaven, equality, priesthood authority, polygamy, and sexuality. It’s important to pray, ponder, and discern your own position.
In this NEW podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Tony Overbay of The Virtual Couch Podcast (@tonyoverbay) to discuss differentiation, self-validation, and the vital role of self-confrontation in intimate relationships.
In this NEW podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Rohnda Farr (@rhondafarr_coaching ) to discuss the impact of over-functioning and feelings of superiority in marriage, and what couples can do to address the behaviors that are limiting the intimacy in their marriage.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
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The self-deceptions of an over-achiever (you might be surprised)
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Why you may feel the“need to be needed”
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Recognizing your false sense of control
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Dealing with powerlessness in your life
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How competition can creep into marriage.
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Wanting vs Desiring
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife talks about the upcoming Art of Loving retreat for men. You can learn more about the retreat and get your ticket HERE.
This NEW podcast episode is the recording of Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s presentation during a recent gospel study session hosted by Dialogue: A Journal of Mormon Thought. This fascinating discussion focuses on the fall of King David and how each of us is still beloved by God, despite being vulnerable to our own hubris and self-deception.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
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The importance of self-confrontation
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The complexities of humanity
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Facing our darker selves
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Honesty
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Spiritual development
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Self-deception
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Marriage as a mechanism for growth
In this NEW podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Sherrae Phelps to discuss ways Latter-Day Saints can navigate this period of transition within the church with strength and integrity, and what we can do as individuals to contribute to the development of our community.
In this episode of Room for Two, Dr. Finlayson-Fife works with Andy and April to see how they each contributed to the marital dysfunction and, in particular, how Andy's dysfunction was expressed in deception and betrayal. She works with the couple to help them see what they can do to move forward, as well as bring more honesty and equality to their relationship.
In this NEW podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Matana of the Hope to Recharge podcast for a powerful discussion on faith, integrity, and spiritual development.
In this NEW podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the hosts of the Bless the Refreshments Podcast to discuss why talking about sex with our kids and spouses can be so difficult and what we can do to reduce our own anxiety about sexuality.
In this episode of Marriage on a Tightrope, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Kattie Mount to talk about the many incredible workshops and retreats she will be hosting this year. If you've ever been curious about attending an in-person event with Dr. Finlayson-Fife, you are going to love this episode!
In this conversation with Michelle Larson of Uplift for Kids, Dr. Finlayson-Fife discusses what parents can do to facilitate the healthy sexual development of their children throughout every stage of development.
Many of us inherited meanings about sexuality from our families and culture that have actually inhibited our sexual desire. In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Rachel Nielson from the 3 in 30 podcast to discuss these restrictive meaning frames and how we can shift our mindset to make room for more desire and a more fulfilling sexual relationship.
In this full-length Room for Two preview episode, Jennifer meets with Carly and Dave. Dave has spent his entire life being a problem solver--for his mother, his wife, and the world. This over-functioning has interfered with his ability to be knowable to others. As a result of this heroic tendency, Dave tends to view his wife as more of a problem to be solved than as an intimate friend. A dynamic that has left Carly feeling lonely, frustrated, and resentful.
In this NEW podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Sherrae Phelps for a powerful discussion about the often disillusioning middle years of life, and what we can do to remain hopeful, engaged, and productive during this phase of our development.
This NEW podcast episode is the recording of a recent Facebook live where Dr. Finlayson-Fife addressed the gift of men's sexuality and took questions from Facebook group members about masculinity, hierarchy, pornography, and more!
This is part to of the interview Monica Packer of About Progress conducted with Carolyn Bever & Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife to discuss parenting perfectionistic children. Listen to learn more about...
- How to define your role as a parent
- Shifting the value from external sources to one’s internal courage
- More tips on parenting your perfectionistic child
- And more...
Dr. Finlayson-Fife was interview by the Find the Magic team about addressing and helping our children develop a healthy relationship with their sexuality. Listen to learn more about: - Questions to ask yourself to help you sort out your own relationship to your sexuality - How to help your child understand that they are a powerful chooser in their life, especially around their sexuality - How to create guidelines and boundaries with your kids as they learn to integrate their sexuality - Teaching your children that being careful around their sexual choices matters
Monica Packer of About Progress talked with Carolyn Bever & Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife to discuss parenting perfectionistic children. Listen to learn more about... - How to identify if you have a perfectionistic child - Why perfectionistic children can be over or underperforming - Separating your own sense of worth from your child’s achievements - How to illustrate the importance of failure in the process
Dr. Finlayson-Fife was interviewed by Ivy, Kristi’s daughter. Ivy is a smart and thoughtful teen who asked wonderful questions pertinent to all teens and parents of teens!
Listen to this podcast to hear Dr. Finlayson talk directly to teens about:
- Troubles that teens face in friendships and relationships
- Anxiety
- Disagreements with parents
- and more!
Dr. Finlayson-Fife joined Momivate for a Momversation on the topic of improving your marital relationship. This episode is full of helpful tips and insights including:
- How to address conflicts in the marital and sexual relationship that interfere with happiness
- Claiming your sexuality as your own
- A helpful distinction between forgiveness and trusting
- Normalizing struggles in marriage and using those struggles for our growth
In this recording of a Facebook Live Dr. Finlayson-Fife teaches about boundaries. Listen to this episode to learn more about: - The purpose of boundaries - Types of boundaries - How to be clear headed when setting your boundaries - The immense importance of honesty
Morgan knows sexual desire, but she has deliberately repressed those feelings for so long that she is struggling to get them back.
When she was younger, Morgan had a healthy curiosity about sex but felt she had crossed a line by reading romantic literature. In an effort to restore a sense of worthiness, she changed course and tried to never look back.
While Morgan now tries to be sexual with Harry, her heart just isn’t in it. She finds it more intuitive to accommodate Harry than to find and express her own eroticism after so many years of trying to snuff it out. In this episode of Room for Two, Dr. Finlayson-Fife explores how Morgan’s anxiety, perfectionism, and external moral reference have limited her capacity for intimacy, and what she can do to develop a healthier relationship to her sexuality as well as a more fulfilling intimate relationship with Harry.
In this episode, Dr. Jennifer joins Courtney Anderson of the Glow Boss Podcast to answer your questions about sex. They cover everything from high libido to sexual dreams about an ex to the psychology of climaxing. Listen to hear more about:
- How to integrate freedom in the sexual relationship in a committed relationship
- Meaning frames that can help your sexual relationship thrive through changes in life such as the postpartum stage and aging
- Navigating desire differences in your relationship
This episode is a recording of Dr. Jennifer reading an essay she wrote entitled "Let's Talk about Sex". The full episode can be found on the Breaking Down Patriarchy podcast hosted by Amy Allebest. Listen to this episode to hear more about.... - Women’s relationship to their sexuality in the context of a patriarchal society - LDS women’s ability to be choosers in the sexual realm - Cultural invalidation of women’s eroticism - Why self-hood is a stronger factor in desire than biological drive - How undermining women’s strength undermines strength in marriages, families and society
In this new podcast episode Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the hosts of the Latter-day Contemplation podcast to discuss the Divine Feminine.
Rick and Sarah are really good at hiding.
Rick hides behind his nice guy persona—he has learned through experience that if he keeps Sarah comfortable enough, he will maximize the chances of getting sex. So, he skirts around the truth and keeps his honest thoughts to himself in an attempt to keep the boat from rocking. Sarah has fully bought into this dynamic and pushes for Rick’s accommodation. She knows the part to play, plays it well, and takes refuge in fading into the background and letting Rick take care of her. While this one-up/one-down dynamic has created an amicable enough marriage, it hasn’t created much passion or intimacy.
In this episode of Room for Two, Dr. Finlayson-Fife meets again with Rick and Sarah to discuss how they can create a more equal and strong partnership by both bringing more courage and honesty to their relationship.
Zach and Darcy Spafford of The Self-Mastery Podcast: Overcome Pornography for Good interviewed Dr. Finlayson-Fife and discussed the roots of the issues surrounding unwanted pornography use, betrayal trauma and infidelity.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife joined Sherrae Phelps to discuss how to navigate religious challenges with integrity, from the best within us.
“Parenting is noble work, in part because you are so often reaching through the dark trying to figure out what it means to love this unique child, with their specific challenges, strengths and desires.”
Dr. Finlayson-Fife joined Tina Gosney of the Parenting Through the Detour podcast to answer difficult questions that are on parents minds and souls.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Dr. Corey Allan of Sexy Marriage Radio for a frank discussion about resentment in marriage and how we can avoid this common pitfall by becoming more honest with ourselves and learning to not rely on our spouses for validation.
It can be extraordinarily difficult to break free from the framing and meanings that we were handed in childhood. It is easy to perpetuate these systems unwittingly as adults because it is what we know--it's the water we are swimming in.
The process of waking up to the way we are participating in unhealthy systems requires a lot of self-confrontation, faith, and courage. It means breaking free of the systems we know and taking the more courageous path of offering our partners and children something better than what we received.
In this NEW podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Paul Duane of The Soul Anarchist podcast for an engaging and powerful discussion of everything from the evolution of Jennifer's understanding of and relationship to God to the power of lipstick and high-waisted jeans.
Phil and Claire still have a lot to untangle from their past and the views they each inherited about sexuality from their family and culture. In this follow-up interview, Claire and Phil are wondering how they can bring more real passion into their intimate relationship. Listen in as Dr. Finlayson-Fife works with Phil and Claire to explore what they can do to bring their newfound honesty and authenticity to their physical relationship.
In this NEW podcast episode Jennifer joins Heidi Benjaminson of Confidence Coaching to talk to parents about confidence, perfectionism, and how to best help our kids navigate the awkward and uncomfortable process of maturing into adulthood.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Tina Gosney for a timely conversation about the importance of bringing honesty and courage to our faith community, especially when it comes to complex and divisive social issues. Being both loving and honest, even with varying perspectives, fosters greater understanding and compassion, and helps us all become wiser.
In this NEW podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Jared and Ethan Thomas of the @a.brothers.creed podcast to talk about how society's view of masculinity has shifted over time and how to develop real masculine strength.
Feeling rejected by your spouse in any realm can be disheartening, but when the rejection is sexual, it can be exceptionally demoralizing experiencing.
Sexual rejection is particularly potent because during arousal states the brain is highly plastic. So any emotion, good or bad, holds extra sway when it is experienced during an aroused state.
In this episode of Sex Therapy 101, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Cami Hurst to answer a listener's question about how to move forward and cultivate her sexuality after years of feeling undesired and fundamentally rejected by her spouse during their 21-year mixed-orientation marriage.
Adam and Sarah have a communication problem. While they feel that they don't communicate well, the reality is that their communication is crystal clear, they just don't like what is being communicated.
Both Adam and Sarah entered the marriage with rigid ideas of what their relationship would look like, and when those expectations went unfulfilled, the resentment they felt for each other began to grow. In this episode, listen in as Dr. Finlayson-Fife works with Adam and Sarah to help them learn to become less dependant on each other while creating a relationship with more compassion and deeper honesty in the process.
In this episode of Mormonland Jennifer joins a panel with Michael Austin, Jacob Hess, and hosts Peggy Fletcher Stack and David Noyce to discuss the history, theology, and ethics of sexual relations in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
Tiffany has never been able to orgasm and is having difficulty trusting her husband. Riley has been sexually compulsive from adolescence and induces anxiety in his wife through his untrustworthy sexual behavior.
Listen as Dr. Finlayson-Fife helps Riley confront the fact that he is using his behavior to keep control of his wife’s validation, and how his framing of porn addiction misses the mark and interferes with him truly changing his behavior.
To subscribe go to the Room for Two Webpage!
Dr. Finlayson-Fife joined Monica Packer, the host of About Progress, and Dr. Julie Hanks for a discussion about what true partnership in marriage looks like and how to work towards it.
In this episode, Jennifer helps Rick and Sarah see the unhealthy dynamic that has developed in their marriage and why this approval seeking is detrimental to passion. Jennifer guides Rick and Sarah to a new way of thinking, a mindset which will allow them to create a marriage where there is room for real choice and deeper intimacy.
In this episode Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the hosts of Bless the Refreshments to discuss how looking at improving yourself will improve your marriage.
Dave has spent his entire life being a problem solver--for his mother, his wife, and the world. This over-functioning has interfered with Dave’s ability to be knowable to others. As a result of this heroic tendency, Dave tends to view his wife as more of a problem to be solved than as an intimate friend. A dynamic that has left Carly feeling lonely, frustrated, and resentful.
Listen to Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s input on how to help this couple to see the roles they have each played in this frustrating dynamic and what they can do to create a more intimate partnership and friendship.
Sherrae Phelps and Dr. Finlayson-Fife recorded a timely and thoughtful conversation about navigating your sexual identity as a teen and what role parents can play in that process.
Join Dr. Finlayson-Fife and ST Rappaport of the LifePix Relationships Podcast to discuss the inherent connection between emotional and relational intimacy in relationships.
A taste of Dr. Finlayson-Fife's new podcast Room for Two! Jane is a people pleaser. She has spent her life pursuing validation by doing all the things she knows she "should''. Up until now, her choices have been driven by seeking others’ approval, but she is ready for a change. Jane is wrestling with herself to find the courage to exert her desires and individuality into her relationship and into the world. Doing so has put pressure on Jane and John's marriage to evolve into something less traditional, transactional and guarded to a marriage more honest, open, and grounded in reality.
Join Dr. Finlayson-Fife and host Arielle Finlinson of the "Ladies Talking Love" podcast (@ladies.talkinglove) to discuss what you can do to challenge unhealthy meanings that are operating in your relationship and how to create a more robust sexual relationship with your partner.
In this NEW podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Crystal Noelle of "The Freedom Moms" podcast to discuss what mothers can do to rediscover their desire and passions.
In this NEW podcast, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Dana Dodini of the "From the Mouths of Babes" podcast (@fromthemouthsofbabespodcast) to discuss how women can take claim of their lives and desires and how doing so will help them embrace their God-given sexuality.
Listen to the full episode to learn more about:
- Overcoming "Good Girl" Syndrome
- Claiming your identity, sexuality, and desires
- Challenging cultural ideals of femininity and masculinity
- Transitioning from accommodation to ownership and desire
- How to best teach our children about sexuality
- The importance of prioritizing your own development
In this NEW podcast episode Dr. Finlayson-Fife talks with Makenzie VanWinkle of My Audience is Me to discuss feminism, patriarchy and hierarchies.
In this NEW podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Andrea Giles of the "Heal From Infidelity Podcast" for a candid discussion about infidelity and the opportunity it provides for growth within ourselves.
Amanda Louder of the Sex for Saints podcast interviewed Dr. Finlayson-Fife to discuss equality in marriage.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife joined Jeff and Cathy of Love in the Later Years to discuss sexuality for mid singles.
This episode is the audio from a Facebook live that Dr. Finlayson-Fife hosted on the topic of modesty. Listen to learn more about: - The true meaning of modesty - Unhelpful messages we unwittingly give to men, women, boys and girls about modesty - Helpful messages to replace those harmful narratives
Brexton Bennett of the Rise by Lifting Others podcast interviewed Dr. Finlayson-Fife about becoming the respected therapist she is today.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife joined Heather Frazier of the Pivot Parenting podcast to discuss our attitudes towards physical beauty and how to talk to your kids about these topics.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife and Heather Rackman of the Latter-day Life Coaches discuss honesty, truth, faith and where they all intersect in this episode about owning your spirituality.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife joined Steve and James of the Unashamed Unafraid Podcast to discuss honesty and being fully human. Spoiler alert...the path is not perfectionism!
Dr. Finlayson-Fife was interview on the Faith Matters podcast to discuss the tension between boundaries and belonging when it comes to returning to in-person church following the pandemic.
Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife spoke in the online I Am Mom summit in March 2019 about the common misconceptions and false beliefs that can undermine sexual identity and desire for mothers. Listen to this recording to learn more about: - Maintaining a sense of self in motherhood - Challenging the message that to be a good mother you must needless and wantless - Questions to ask yourself to strengthen your partnership and sexual relationship
Dr. Finlayson-Fife was interviewed by Sherrae Phelps of the Ten Thousand Hours of Writing project to discuss differences in marriage and how to navigate them. Listen to here more about... - The difficulty of navigating differences, especially religious differences, in marriage. - Self-indulgence vs self-definition. - The paradox and tension of marriage. - How to determine with integrity if a difference is too big for the marriage. - How we choose to navigate difference may matter more than the difference itself.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife joined Shane and Jason of the Sprinkled With Hope podcast to discuss sexuality, intimacy and hope. Listen to hear more about...
- A distinction between sex and intimacy
- How to develop a capacity for intimacy
- A positive strategy to use talking to your children about their sexuality
- Advice for newlyweds as they begin their sexual relationship
- Hope and encouragement for meaningful love and intimacy in your life
Dr. Finlayson-Fife had a fun and educational conversation with Rosemary Card of the Q.More Podcast where they covered questions we all have about sex. Listen to learn more about... - Integrating your sexuality regardless of what stage of life you are in - The process of self and sexual development - Intimacy and communication - Questions and discussions to help newlyweds navigate their new sexual relationship
Dr. Finlayson Fife joined Geoff Steurer of From Crisis to Connection to discuss reclaiming your sexuality after betrayal in your marriage. Listen to learn more about: - Reclaiming your individual sexuality after betrayal - The development opportunities afforded by crisis in your relationship - How anchoring in one’s sense of self enhances your relationship to your spouse - The courage required to love
Dr. Finlayson-Fife was interviewed on the Mormon Land podcast about Natasha Helfer's membership disciplinary hearing due to her public stances on masturbation, same-sex marriage and pornography. They discuss these topics as well as the potential effects of Natasha's hearing on mental health professionals and members alike.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife had an honest and empathetic conversation with Kimberlee & Alisha from The Clarity Call about raising children with special needs and the opportunities for self-definition in the face of a difficult reality.
This is a recording of an instagram live Dr. Finlayson-Fife did with musician, Jenn Blosil. They covered so many wonderful topics in this fun, uplifting conversation including: - The Divine Feminine - Sexual Energy - Sublimation - Modesty - and more!
Barbara Zabawa of the Lemon Spark podcast interviewed Dr. Finlayson-Fife about the journey that led her to the career she has today. Listen to hear more about: - Experiences in Jennifer’s life that led her to her career - Your ability to change your circumstances - Two types of “sparks” that can lead to growth
In this interview Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Valerie Hamaker of the Voices About Living podcast to discuss a case study. They cover topics including women's sexual health and how personal freedom impacts sex drive.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife joined Julie Winn of The Porn Addict's Wife Podcast to discuss how the marital sexual relationship can be affected when a spouse is viewing pornography.
Lindsey Sanchez of the Beating Around the Book podcast interviewed Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife to discuss sex and intimacy in literature. Listen to learn more about: - What eroticism is, how to engage it, and how it relates to your partnership. - How literature with erotic content can move you out of the mundane of everyday life and into a place of play with your spouse. - How erotic literature can be used to enrich your life and partnership.
Tammy Hill of the Live Your Why podcast interviewed Dr. Finlayson-Fife and discussed sexuality for single individuals. Listen to this episode to learn more about:
- Where is the line in regards to chastity?
- How to help your children make self-directed choices around their sexuality.
- A discussion about normal sexual developmental behavior
- Core questions to ask yourself to get clear on your relationship to your sexuality
- How to transition into a sexual relationship without guilt or shame when you get married
In a conversation with Nate and Angilyn Bagley of the Mormon Marriages Podcast, Dr. Finlayson-Fife answers several questions sent in by listeners. The topics include: - What subjective and physiological arousal are and how to understand them in yourself. - The importance of play, self-acceptance and acceptance of others as adults. - What is a collaborative alliance and how to do your part in that alliance. - The benefit of giving and receiving in your sexual relationship.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife was interviewed on the From the Mouth of Babes podcast to discuss all things intimacy! Listen to this episode to learn more about...
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What true intimacy looks like and the courage it requires.
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The importance of managing our own sense of self.
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Why honesty is key in intimate relationships.
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Managing differences in a marriage.
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Asking questions to truly understand your spouse and build intimacy in your marriage.
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How to rekindle intimacy and passion in your marriage.
In this podcast episode Don Wotherspoon facilitates a discussion with Dr. Finlayson-Fife, Carol Lynn Pearson and Stephen Carter for the Mormon Matters podcast. They cover multiple topics including beliefs that interfere with intimacy in mormon marriages, the effects of the history of polygamy on modern mormon marriages and how marriage can be an incredible opportunity for development and joy!
In this new podcast episode Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife is interviewed by Courtney Anderson, host of The Glow Boss Podcast, to discuss Valentines Day and some easy and concrete ways to spice up your sex life.
In this new podcast episode discussing faith and faith development with Sherrae Phelps, Dr. Finlayson-Fife addresses the topic of...
Transactional Faith and how we grow into a higher understandings of Faith.
Jennifer and her sister Carolyn Bever speak with Monica Packer of the About Progress podcast all about how to develop ourselves without perfectionism getting in the way!
Listen to hear more about...
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How Carolyn went from only being able to run down the block to qualifying for the Boston Marathon.
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What parenting has taught Jennifer about herself and her own problematic perfectionism.
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How to overcome fears of failure or discomfort.
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The normalcy of perfectionism, the false ideas within it, and how we can transcend it.
This is a unique self-development podcast that you don't want to miss!
Are you dealing with betrayal trauma?
Today we are reposting a popular podcast in which Dr. Finlayson-Fife talks with Scabs of Bloom For Women about...
-Dishonesty in marriage.
-Healing from marital betrayal.
-How to move forward after a breach of trust.
-What infidelity in marriage can show you about your spouse and yourself.
-How you can become stronger in the face of betrayal.
-How to rebuild trust.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins colleague Natasha Helfer to discuss Dr. Schnarch's teachings and legacy. They take up
-Differentiation theory and Dr. David Schnarch's impact in the field of therapy.
-Differentiation and how it's related to strong relationships and a solid sense of self.
-How to better manage anxiety within your relationship and family.
-Common relational and sexual challenges facing those who have grown up in a religiously conservative culture
In honor of David Schnarch, professional colleague Dr. Dave Jenkins, interviews Dr. Finlayson-Fife about
-How she came to find Dr. Schnarch's work
-Personal growth that has come from her experience as a therapist and coach.
-The value of seeking for truth even when it's disorienting.
-How her practice has been influenced by Dr. David Schnarch's life and work.
-The importance of differentiation in human development and creating peace within oneself and healthy relationships
Talking to your kids about sex is a high anxiety experience for many parents!
For LDS families with an LGBTQ child, it can be even more challenging.
In this podcast episode, Allison from www.liftandlove.org and Jenie with Jenie Hunter Coaching talk with Dr. Finlayson-Fife about how to raise LGBTQ children and youth with a healthy sense of their sexuality and of their identity as a child of God.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife and Monica Tanner of the "On The Brighter Side" podcast talk about entrepreneurism and its impact on relationships. Jennifer and Monica discuss..
-Why it can be difficult to ask for support from a spouse when you have a meaningful ambition.
-The challenges that entrepreneurs often confront in their intimate relationships, given the sacrifices and emotional demands of a creative endeavor.
-How to maintain your sense of self in the midst of entrepreneurial demands along with the responsibilities of marriage, and parenting, and work.
-How to address resentment that emerge in marriage productively.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife talks with Dan Purcell of the Get Your Marriage On podcast.
They discuss...
-The 3 stages of sexual development, and how to bring your marriage to the next level.
-The importance of fostering erotic energy in your relationship.
-How to go from having sex to deep connection through love-making.
In this conversation with Tony Overbay of the Virtual Couch podcast, Dr. Finlayson-Fife talks about living with a narcissistic spouse AND the frustrating pursuer-distancer dynamic common to many couples.
Here are some of the specific things Dr. Finlayson-Fife addresses....
-How to function in a relationship when your spouse has narcissistic traits or tendencies.
-Where you are vulnerable when living with or loving someone who won't self-confront or change.
-How to make sense of and address the experience of feeling more invested than your spouse.
-How to grow in your capacity for an open hearted relationship if you tend to stay arm's length.
-Understanding attachment or relational styles (such as being “clingy”, or “walled off” in relationship) and how to grow into a more self-sustaining and relational position.
Jody Moore of the Better Than Happy Podcast interviews Dr. Finlayson-Fife on the topic of Spiritual Maturity. They discuss..
-The importance of spiritual maturity and how to achieve it.
-How to live life more honestly and in line with your integrity.
-The process of approaching obedience with wisdom.
-The true meaning of modesty and how to teach it wisely.
-How perfectionism is a counterfeit virtue, and what real goodness looks like.
-What the fruits of spiritual maturity are.
Jennifer discusses the questions and findings of her research, looking at LDS women and the impact of a patriarchal religious structure on their peace with sexuality and sense of sexual agency.
The third and final part of this conversation covers the following topics...
-How to stand up for better in a sexless marriage
-How to foster desire in marriage
-Masturbation in marriage
-Erotica and pornography
This 3-part interview was Jennifer's first-EVER (and one of her most-listened-to) podcasts!
Jennifer discusses the questions and findings of her research, looking at LDS women and the impact of a patriarchal religious structure on their peace with sexuality and sense of sexual agency.
In this 2012 interview, Dr. Finlayson-Fife is interviewed by Natasha Helfer of the Mormon Mental Health podcast to discuss her dissertation research on LDS women and sexuality.
This podcast episode is for...
-Those personally struggling with unwanted pornography use.
-The spouse of someone who views pornography.
-Anyone seeking to better understand and protect against unhealthy sexual behavior patterns.
In her conversation with Felica Allen of "Find The Magic Podcast", Dr. Finlayson-Fife addresses
-How women can find authentic pleasure in sexuality.
-How to forge meaningful happiness.
-How to take deeper responsibility for your life
In this interview Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins @courtneyspatrouve of the The Spa Trouve Podcast to talk about...
Developing comfort with one's own sexuality. The importance of communicating honestly with a partner. What to do about painful of uncomfortable sex. And how to increase one's desire for sex.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Find Your Person Podcast to discuss the topic of singles, relationships, and sexuality!
She address...
-What healthy boundaries during dating look like. -The importance of sexual attraction in dating and marriage choice. -How to "course correct" while dating and recommit to shared goals. -Differences and similarities between male and female sexuality. -How to foster healthy sexuality in a dating relationship while staying true to ideals such as the law of chastity.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Kami Banks of the Beyond Your Comfort Zone Podcast to discuss...
How and why to invest in yourself
The importance of differentiation and independence in being happy
How to self-validate and gain greater confidence in who you are
Learning from challenges
In this podcast Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Sarah Bauer of the Art of Play to discuss
✔️What your feelings of resentment are trying to tell you
✔️How to foster greater self-respect
✔️How self-development will positively benefit all your relationships
✔️How to tap into your own desires
Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Jeff and Sheldon of the Idea Gym podcast to talk about...
✔️ The foundational structure of an intimate marriage.
✔️ How to participate in a marriage where both partners thrive.
✔️ How to come to peace with our desires (both sexual and otherwise).
✔️ The importance of honesty with yourself and within your marriage in creating a peaceful partnership.
✔️ The difference between intimacy and validation. AND MORE!
In this podcast Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Monica Packer of the About Progress podcast to discuss
-How to stop hating sex
-How to make sense of your negative feelings towards physical intimacy.
-The importance of sexual self-development in your personal confidence.
-The importance of pleasure in living joyfully.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Andy Proctor of the @morehappylife podcast to discuss…
-How parents can better talk to their kids about sexuality and pleasure (without embarrassment).
-The gift of human embodiment and sensuality.
-How people who experience themselves as addicted to sex can take more control of their choices.
-How to think about sexuality as a religious single person in a way that facilitates your well-being.
This episode also includes discussion about...
-Why we are often quick to judge others choices when they invalidate our own.
-How and why we try to control or manipulate our spouse's beliefs or choices and how to better control ourselves (rather than others).
-How to better respect integrity-based decisions, even when they differ from our own.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife talks with Bree and Adam of the Better Me with BodyByBree podcast to do a couples' coaching session!
During their conversation, Dr. Finlayson-Fife addresses
-Differences/imbalances in desire between them
-She exposes the implicit meaning frames between them that create resentment and undermine desire
-She offers them a new way of thinking about their choices to create a sense of closeness and friendship
-How to develop more confidence and courage in the marriage
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Tamara K. Anderson of the “Stories of Hope in Hard Times” podcast to discuss
-Self sufficiency
-Overcoming self-doubt
-Building self-confidence
-Finding strength in trails and
-Learning from the imperfections of life.
Jennifer talks about her own experiences with self-doubt and suffering and the lessons she learned about herself, life, and God in the face of these challenging times.
To learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s work, visit our Website, check out our Course Page, and take a look at our upcoming Events. You can also follow Dr. Finlayson-Fife on Instagram or join her FREE Facebook Group for greater access to her insights.
www.Finlayson-Fife.com
This episode was originally aired on September 2, 2020.
You can also listen to this episode on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify, TuneIn, and Stitcher.
The advice offered through Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s Podcast Archive is educational and informational in nature and is provided only as general information. It is not meant to establish a therapist-patient relationship or offer therapeutic advice, opinion, diagnosis treatment or to establish a standard of care. Although Dr. Finlayson-Fife is a trained psychotherapist, she is not functioning in the role of a licensed therapist during these sessions, but rather using her training to inform these sessions. Thus, the content is not intended to replace independent professional judgment. The content is not intended to solicit clients or patients; and should not be relied upon as medical or psychological advice of any kind or nature whatsoever. The information provided through the Content should not be used for diagnosing or treating a mental health problem or disease. The information contained in these communications is not comprehensive and does not include all the potential information regarding the subject matter, but is merely intended to serve as one resource for general and educational purposes.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the Marriage On A Tightrope podcast to discuss the topic of mixed faith marriage!
Jennifer addresses topics such as
✔️How you can find shared values and spiritual practices when one stops believing.
✔️How you can deal with condescension from family or friends about a spouse's shift in belief.
✔️How each person in the couple can handle the difference in belief maturely or tyrannically.
To learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s work, visit our Website, check out our Course Page, and take a look at our upcoming Events. You can also follow Dr. Finlayson-Fife on Instagram or join her FREE Facebook Group for greater access to her insights.
www.Finlayson-Fife.com
This episode was originally aired on August 4, 2020.
You can also listen to this episode on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify, TuneIn, and Stitcher.
The advice offered through Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s Podcast Archive is educational and informational in nature and is provided only as general information. It is not meant to establish a therapist-patient relationship or offer therapeutic advice, opinion, diagnosis treatment or to establish a standard of care. Although Dr. Finlayson-Fife is a trained psychotherapist, she is not functioning in the role of a licensed therapist during these sessions, but rather using her training to inform these sessions. Thus, the content is not intended to replace independent professional judgment. The content is not intended to solicit clients or patients; and should not be relied upon as medical or psychological advice of any kind or nature whatsoever. The information provided through the Content should not be used for diagnosing or treating a mental health problem or disease. The information contained in these communications is not comprehensive and does not include all the potential information regarding the subject matter, but is merely intended to serve as one resource for general and educational purposes.
In this podcast episode Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Mike Frazier with Strong Men, Strong Marriages Podcast to talk about...
-Female sexuality and desire.
-Why you need to stop being “pathetic” :-) and what to do instead.
-How to approach sex with your wife in a way that’s attractive and effective.
-How to better take ownership of your own sexuality in a way that will bless your marriage.
In a conversation with Nate and Angilyn Bagley of the Mormon Marriages Podcast, Dr. Finlayson-Fife answers several questions sent in by listeners.
In Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s sixth podcast with About Progress, they discuss the notion of agency and choices and how taking responsibility for our choices impacts our happiness and peace of mind. This episode gives lots of examples of making choices within specific relational realities.
Dan Wotherspoon, host of "Mormon Matters" interviews Dr. Finlayson-Fife and Natasha Helfer Parker about the messaging around modesty and sexuality and how to teach our sexual values most productively.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Sherrae Phelps to talk about the topic of obedience. They discuss questions such as…
-When is it good to yield to the authority of another?
-What is the difference between the choice to comply based in moral courage vs. obedience that is dangerous?
-What is the risk in valuing obedience as an inherent virtue, and how do we reconcile the value of humility with moral responsibility?
In a conversation with Rhonda Farr of The Intimacy Podcast, Dr. Finlayson-Fife talks about...
False cultural ideas that many men internalize about sexuality. How to manage desire differences and a spouse's refusal without anger or withdrawal. How to approach sexuality when a spouse has experienced sexual trauma. A sneak peek into what will be taught in the Men’s Sexuality course (COMING THIS FALL)!
To learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s work, visit our Website, check out our Online Course Page, and take a look at our upcoming Events. You can also follow Dr. Finlayson-Fife on Instagram, YouTube, or join her FREE Facebook Group for greater access to her insights.
www.Finlayson-Fife.com
Listen to this episode on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify, TuneIn, and Stitcher.
In a conversation with life coach Heather Frazier of Pivot Parenting Podcast, Dr. Finlayson-Fife talks about...
Why we measure ourselves by external things. How to be true to yourself. How to foster integrity and confidence in your children.
To learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s work, visit our Website, check out our Online Course Page, and take a look at our upcoming Events. You can also follow Dr. Finlayson-Fife on Instagram, YouTube, or join her FREE Facebook Group for greater access to her insights.
www.Finlayson-Fife.com
Listen to this episode on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify, TuneIn, and Stitcher.
In a conversation with Nate and Angilyn Bagley of the Mormon Marriages Podcast, Dr. Finlayson-Fife answers several questions sent in by listeners.
In a conversation with clinical psychologist Zac Rhodenizer of The Psychology Of Podcast, Dr. Finlayson-Fife talks about the the psychology of male sexuality.
In a conversation with Makenzie VanWinkle of the "My Audience Is Me" Podcast, Dr. Finlayson-Fife talks about what it looks like to live your life from your highest desires.
In this discussion with Sarah Mendenhall of the Sitting Down With Sarah Podcast, Dr. Finlayson-Fife responds to questions such as…
What are the stages that couples go through when facing a faith challenge? Can you arrive at shared values in a mixed-faith relationship? Can you live in two different paradigms of belief and still be friends and good parents? How can you talk to your kids about a parent's faith transition? How can you teach your children shared values when each parent believes differently? How can you find the courage to love in the face of difference?
To learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s work, visit our Website, check out our Online Course Page, and take a look at our upcoming Events. You can also follow Dr. Finlayson-Fife on Instagram, YouTube, or join her FREE Facebook Group for greater access to her insights.
www.Finlayson-Fife.com
Listen to this episode on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify, TuneIn, and Stitcher.
In part two of of her discussion with Matt Davis of Steelyard Academy Podcast, Dr. Finlayson-Fife addresses the following topics...
Taking greater responsibility for yourself. Finding greater meaning and purpose in your life. How to better measure success and happiness. Understanding sex as a powerful form of communication.
To learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s work, visit our Website, check out our Online Course Page, and take a look at our upcoming Events. You can also follow Dr. Finlayson-Fife on Instagram, YouTube, or join her FREE Facebook Group for greater access to her insights.
www.Finlayson-Fife.com
Listen to this episode on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify, TuneIn, and Stitcher.
In a discussion with Matt Davis of Steelyard Academy Podcast, Dr. Finlayson-Fife addresses the following topics...
Understanding the relationship between anxiety and depression and externalized expectations. Claiming your life choices in the face of pressures from others. Understanding resentment and what it can teach you about yourself. Balancing expectations and freedom appropriately to foster self-development in your child.
To learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s work, visit our Website, check out our Online Course Page, and take a look at our upcoming Events. You can also follow Dr. Finlayson-Fife on Instagram, YouTube, or join her FREE Facebook Group for greater access to her insights.
www.Finlayson-Fife.com
Listen to this episode on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify, TuneIn, and Stitcher.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Dr. Corey Allan from Sexy Marriage Radio to discuss the higher desire wife and the lower desire husband relationship dynamic.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Amy Watson from the Smooth Stones Podcast to discuss intimacy after loss.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson Fife and Preston Pugmire of the Next Level Life Podcast examine emotional maturity, its roots, its effects and how to invest in your own self-development in order to thrive in relationships and business.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Cherie Burton to talk about:
How women often become disempowered sexually in religious traditions. How many religious traditions (often unknowingly) contribute to body shaming, inhibit self-expression, and undermine self-development. How women can foster a stronger self in their lives and spiritual practices. How women can foster peace with their sexuality.
AND MORE!
To learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s work, visit our Website, check out our Online Course Page, and take a look at our upcoming Events. You can also follow Dr. Finlayson-Fife on Instagram or join her FREE Facebook Group for greater access to her insights.
www.Finlayson-Fife.com
Listen to this episode on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify, TuneIn, and Stitcher.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins The Betrayed, The Addicted, And The Expert Podcast to talk about:
The common relational patterns at the root of addiction and betrayal and how to change these dysfunctional dynamics. How to relate to religious belief to foster courage and integrity rather than fear. What “sex-positive” means in a religious context. How women can integrate their sexuality without being vulnerable to a sexually irresponsible or indulgent spouse. How to understand aspects of sexual compulsivity.
AND MORE!
To learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s work, visit our Website, check out our Online Course Page, and take a look at our upcoming Events. You can also follow Dr. Finlayson-Fife on Instagram or join her FREE Facebook Group for greater access to her insights.
www.Finlayson-Fife.com
Listen to this episode on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify, TuneIn, and Stitcher.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Preston from the Mettle Mentality Podcast to talk about the following:
The importance of intimacy in happiness. Perfectionism and its challenge to openness / intimacy. Understanding shame and guilt.
To learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s work, visit our Website, check out our Online Course Page, and take a look at our upcoming Events. You can also follow Dr. Finlayson-Fife on Instagram or join her FREE Facebook Group for greater access to her insights.
www.Finlayson-Fife.com
Listen to this episode on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify, TuneIn, and Stitcher.
Allowing Yourself to Fully Experience Being Human Preston - Mettle Mentality Podcast
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Sara Payne from the The Doctor’s Wife Podcast to talk about resentment.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Cami Hurst from the Sex Therapy 101 Podcast to talk about learning to say no when needed. They talk about topics such as learning to set boundaries and dealing with a spouse’s pornography use.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the Cultivate A Good Life Podcast to talk about healthy sexual development. They talk about how to teach your kids about sexuality without shame and fear.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the Cultivate A Good Life Podcast to talk about desire. They talk about what desire is, why it matters, and how to identify and develop the desires you have.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins her daughter Jane to talk about her career as a marriage counselor and the things she’s learned along the way. This interview was done for a journalism project for Jane’s 8th grade class. We ask that you please excuse any background noise caused by Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s family and dog.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the Women With Fire Podcast to talk about topics such as sexuality, integrity, and teaching our kids about sex and desire.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Stephanie Webb from Eat Confident Co to talk about body image.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife offers her perspective on how a woman’s relationship with her body influences her intimate relationship, how to set healthy boundaries in a marriage, and how to empower yourself as an equal partner in your marriage by healing your relationship with your body.
To learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s work, visit our Website, check out our Course Page, and take a look at our upcoming Events. You can also follow Dr. Finlayson-Fife on Instagram or join her FREE Facebook Group for greater access to her insights.
www.Finlayson-Fife.com
This episode was originally aired on February 5th 2020.
You can also listen to this episode on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify, TuneIn, and Stitcher.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Rich and Celeste from the Marriage Theraoke podcast to talk about how we deal with the dissatisfaction in our marriages and how to more fully CHOOSE our partner every day.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife is interviewed by Monica Tanner of On The Brighter Side Podcast. Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife talks about setting personal goals and setting goals as a couple. She goes into detail about what collaborative goals look like and common pitfalls/problems that come up when trying to keep new goals, and how to overcome these.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife is interviewed by Ray Cox and Ellen Hersam from the Improving Intimacy in Mormon Marriages Facebook group. Dr. Finlayson-Fife answers questions about neediness, using sex to avoid conflict, differences in desire, and advice for newly weds.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Corey Allan from Sexy Marriage Radio to talk about the dynamic of desire differences and the lower desire wife.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife is interviewed by Jodi Chaffee from Our Modern Heritage about how to raise kids in an overly sexualized world.
This podcast episode is an audio recording of Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s presentation Sexuality and Singledom: Navigating with Clarity and Integrity. This presentation was recorded in New York City at a singles’ conference called “Of One Body: The State of Mormon Singledom.”
The Bloom for Women team interview Dr. Finlayson-Fife as part of its Love Rice Podcast series. The topic is "betrayal trauma" and overcoming the impact of infidelity and other forms of dishonesty in intimate relationships.
In this episode, Bloom for Women interviews Dr. Finlayson-Fife as part of its Love Rice Podcast series. This is a continuation of the discussion that was begun in part 1. The topic of this conversation is "betrayal trauma" and overcoming the impact of infidelity and other forms of dishonesty in intimate relationships.
In an interview for the Love Rice podcast series from Bloom for Women, Dr. Finlayson-Fife talks about how to belong to others as well as ourselves. She also explains how reconciling these tensions is related to our spiritual development.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the the Rational Faiths Podcast Team to answer two questions:
Question number one is about how to teach young women about the Law of Chastity Question number two is about the problem of pornography.
To learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s work, visit our Website, check out our Course Page, and take a look at our upcoming Events. You can also follow Dr. Finlayson-Fife on Instagram or join her FREE Facebook Group for greater access to her insights.
www.Finlayson-Fife.com
This episode was originally aired on February 1st, 2015.
You can also listen to this episode on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify, TuneIn, and Stitcher.
In this podcast episode Dr. Finlayson-Fife addresses the question: How does one develop a solid sense of self within groups that celebrate "selflessness" as a feminine virtue?
The Mormon Channel Daily interviews Dr. Finlayson-Fife on love and how to make your marriage better.
In this episode, Jody Moore interviews Dr. Finlayson-Fife about women's sexuality and desire, pornography and talking to our kids about sex.
In this interview with Nate Bagley from the Loveumentary, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife talks about the following topics: how a patriarchal view of sex can be damaging to your relationship, why it's important to take ownership of your own desires and your own sexuality, helpful tips for experiencing orgasm, and how good sex takes lots of practice.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Jody Moore for a discussion about how to teach our kids about their sexuality and the law of chastity without inviting shame, with children from infancy through the young adult years.
In this episode, Latter Day Lives Podcast host Sean Rapier interviews Dr. Finlayson-Fife about her journey discovering worth and strength as a woman in the church. They also talk about the marriage, intimacy and issues facing today’s LDS couples.
In an interview with Rhonda Farr, an LDS sexual intimacy coach, Dr. Finlayson-Fife discusses the importance of developing one’s relationship with one’s own sexuality and desire. Rhonda Farr and Dr. Finlayson-Fife talk about how understanding the parts of yourself that you don't currently love, can actually lead you to find greater confidence. You can also listen to this interview on YouTube.
In this episode, the Marriage Laboratory interviews Dr. Finlayson-Fife in an episode focusing on the high desire partner in a sexual relationship.
In this podcast episode, Greg Reynolds from the Marriage Mastery Podcast speaks with Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife about the importance of healthy sexual expression in marriage. They touch on topics such as the differences in male and female sexuality and how to create a happy relationship in which both members can thrive.
In a new "About Progress" Podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife talks with Monica Packer about our fruitless efforts to change a loved one, and what productive choices you can make instead!
In this podcast episode, Dan Wotherspoon from Mormon Matters Podcast, Chelsea Fife, Chelsea Strayer, and Dr. Finlayson-Fife discuss Mormonism’s messages about motherhood.
In this first ever LIVE recording of an Ask a Mormon Sex Therapist podcast episode Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the Mormon Marriages team to address the following questions…
Question # 1 - “My wife and I are trying to conceive. This is one of the most stressful times of my life, and stress is a major anti-aphrodisiac for me. How do I confront the pressure to perform?”
Question # 2 - "My wife has a “fun” sexual past with her high school boyfriends. Before we dated she had shared too many of those experiences with me. I was fine with it, until I woke up to her crying on our wedding night. It triggered a jealousy and resentment where I feel she gave “them” her fun self. I got the Mormon prude and they got the fun girl. I love her, but I feel like she has never chosen me. I get that I’m at fault with the unforgiving heart and mad with jealousy that has built emotional walls. I feel like all our sex has been mercy sex. I don’t even want to have sex with her because that’s what it is. When we become intimate all I can see is her doing “this” with “them.” It makes me regret and feel bitterness that I strived to stay a virgin and be as "clean" as I could. I feel like I have lived life wrong. Since she is a terrific good person and she has the “dirty” past, she is the better more healthy person while I am the bitter/resentful seminary graduate boy. It makes me hate myself that I can’t get over that. I’m over 15 years into this and the cloud just gets darker and bigger. How can I start becoming more intimate with my wife while suffering with this intense jealousy? I just finished your course enhancing sexual intimacy and I am grateful for you and what you are doing. So, thank you and I would love to here your answer knowing it will be painful.”
This episode is part two of the two part live podcast recording.
To learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s work, visit our Website, check out our Course Page, and take a look at our upcoming Events.
www.Finlayson-Fife.com
This episode was originally aired on October 11th 2019.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Natasha Helfer Parker from Mormon Sex Info to discuss the topic of how to best handle a pornography disclosure within a couple system.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins A Thoughtful Faith Podcast to discuss the topic of cognitive dissonance and faith transition.
In this first ever LIVE recording of an Ask a Mormon Sex Therapist podcast episode Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the Mormon Marriages team to talk about…
The story of what inspired Dr. Finlayson-Fife to dedicate her education and career to helping LDS women and couples improve their relationships and their lives. Two questions are answered, both asked by women:
Question ONE addresses the cultural pressure to suppress sexuality and how to overcome it. Because the stereotype of a good LDS woman seems to not include comfort with her sexuality, how does one not succumb to this instinctively?
Question TWO addresses one woman’s inability to orgasm. Dr. Finlayson-Fife talks about the psychological shifts as well as behaviors that can help achieve or expand one’s capacity for climax.
This episode is one of two parts of the live recording. Part 29 is the second half of this live interview.
To learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s work, visit our Website, check out our Course Page, and take a look at our upcoming Events.
www.Finlayson-Fife.com
This episode was originally aired on October 6th 2019.
The Ask a Mormon Sex Therapist podcast series has moved from Rational Faiths to Mormon Marriages with Nate and Angilyn Bagley. In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife covers topics such as managing different levels of desire and premature ejaculation.
In this Rational Faiths podcast Dr. Finlayson-Fife answers two new questions:
The first question covers the question of how to make sense of wet dreams in the context of marriage, and how to address differences in sexual desire and biological needs in constructive ways.
The second question addresses the role of erotica and visually explicit imagery in a woman cultivating her desire in marriage. Dr. Finlayson-Fife also addresses the upcoming transition for the “Ask a Mormon Sex Therapist” series.
To learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s work, visit our Website, check out our Course Page, and take a look at our upcoming Events.
www.Finlayson-Fife.com
This episode was originally aired on July 9th 2019.
In this podcast, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the Rational Faiths Podcast team to address three questions sent in by listeners. The first question is regarding maintaining intimacy in long distance relationships, the second is about discomfort with “talking dirty” during sex, and the last question is about masturbation.
In this episode Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the Rational Faiths Podcast team to respond to two questions. One question is about navigating intimacy after having learned to orgasm after many years of going without. The second question asks how to respond in a relationship in which the spouse is habitually deceptive.
In this podcast episode Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the Rational Faiths team to respond to three new questions, all coming from men, covering topics of intimacy after tragic loss, disparity in desire, and becoming a more confident lover.
In this podcast episode Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the Rational Faiths Podcast team to answer two questions : The first question is about the impact of childhood sexual abuse and parental negligence on desire and intimacy in one woman's marriage. The second question is about a man whose wife wants him to be more sexually assertive.
In the 16th installment of the Ask A Mormon Sex Therapist series Dr. Finlayson-Fife responds to two more questions submitted from listeners. One focuses on nudity and modesty, and the second question comes from a person in a really tough position in a sexless marriage in which discussion and negotiation of sexual relations are off limits.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the Rational Faiths team to answer three listener questions. The first question is about a sexually entitled husband who is unresponsive to his wife’s wishes, the second question is about the use of vibrators, and the third question is from a person navigating a mixed-orientation marriage.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife and the Rational Faiths team tackle two questions submitted by listeners. The first asks about “dirty/degrading” talk during sex and the second seeks advice on teaching about sex in a positive way.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the Rational Faiths team to answer two questions submitted by listeners about infidelity in marriage.
In this episode Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the Rational Faiths Podcast team to take on questions about the cultural anxiety surrounding oral sex in a married relationship, and about objectification and appropriate lust.
In this episode Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the Rational Faiths Podcast team to discuss the results of a study about sexual arousal, and Dr. Finlayson-Fife answers a question from a listener who is frustrated at inability to reach orgasm during intercourse.
In this episode Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the Rational Faiths Podcast team to talk about understanding and responding to pornography challenges as well as low sexual desire in men.
In this episode Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the Rational Faiths Podcast team to discuss ways to spice up your sex life, how to navigate a robust sex life with older children in the home, and how to cope with physical ailments that often come with age like erectile dysfunction.
In this episode Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the Rational Faiths Podcast team to talk about overcoming the perceived threat of spouse's previous sexual experiences (including pornography), and the effect on desire and self-confidence. They also address the topic of long distance sexual relationships.
In this episode Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the Rational Faiths Podcast team to talk about how to raise children (especially girls) to own their sexuality and how to help children navigate worthiness interviews.
In this episode Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the Rational Faiths Podcast team to talk about what you can do as the higher desire person to improve your sexual relationship. They also have a discussion on LDS male sexuality.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins the Rational Faiths Podcast team to have a discussion on the loss of sexual desire upon marriage, how to respond to it, and more on fantasy and how to reconcile it with goodness.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Angilyn and Nate Bagley of the Mormon Marriages Podcast to talk about intimacy, sexuality and the meaning frames or "false traditions" that limit our relational and sexual development in marriage.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife speaks with the Rational Faiths Podcast team all about re-framing masturbation and sexuality for children/youth and staying sexy while accepting the effects of age.
In this episode, the Rational Faiths Podcast team and Dr. Finlayson-Fife tackle the following questions:
"How do I feel more sexual desire?" and "What is acceptable in an LDS sexual relationship?"
To learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife’s work, visit our Website, check out our Course Page, and take a look at our upcoming Events.
www. Finlayson-Fife.com
This episode was originally aired on November 11, 2015.
In this episode Dr. Finlayson-Fife and the Rational Faiths Podcast team discuss household duties, relationship dynamics, female desire, and LDS singles and sexuality.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife speaks with the Rational Faiths Podcast team about advice to give a virginal couple who is about to get married and the role of fantasy in sexual relationships.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife speaks with Paul Barker of the Rational Faiths Podcast about issues of modesty within a school setting, romance novels as a form of erotica, what is “acceptable” within marriage & what is not, divorce and intimacy, and talking to kids about sex.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife talks with Buffy Stinchfield from the Birth Ready and Beyond Podcast, all about how to overcome the issue of painful or uncomfortable sex.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife chats with Michelle Stevenett from the Mind. Body. Boss. Podcast all about modesty. They cover topics like how to teach modesty and what modesty is and is not.
Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Tony Overbay on his podcast, The Virtual Couch, to talk about the challenges around sexuality that women (and men) face growing up in a faith-based culture.
In this podcast episode with Tony Overbay, Dr. Finlayson-Fife discusses what to do if you no longer find your partner physically attractive, as well as how to communicate in a relationship where one partner has a high desire for intimacy and one has a low desire. She also engages in a discussion about how to deal with deception within a relationship (ex. pornography or infidelity).
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife chats with Michelle Stevenett from the Mind. Body. Boss Podcast about body image. They cover topics like fostering self-compassion, feeling at peace with our bodies, and how body image impacts relationships.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife talks with Chanelle Neilson from the Moms Who Know Podcast about keys to a healthy marriage and intimate relationship. Her focus on changing oneself rather than one’s spouse is a powerful way to really improve a marriage.
Bill Reel, host of Mormon Discussions, interviews Dr. Finlayson-Fife about healthy sexuality in a LDS context.
In this episode, Molly from Divorced Mormon Mom Podcast interviews Dr. Finlayson-Fife and discusses the challenges of being a divorced, faithful Mormon who is committed to keeping covenants and also has experienced a sexual relationship before. Molly asks about common concerns and questions including fears with sex, complexities of dating after divorce, and sexual compatibility.
Have you ever heard the saying, "I am my own worst enemy?" If you've thought or said that about yourself, then this episode is for you. (And if you haven't, then this episode is also for you.)
Monica Packer from the About Progress Podcast interviews me on the topic of Goodness---How creating goodness is different from approval-seeking, as well as perspectives on how to develop and discern what is good when faced with real and imagined pressures.
Monica Packer of the About Progress Podcast asks Dr. Finlayson-Fife for her thoughts on perfectionism, how to make sense of it, and how to overcome it.
Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife is back with another interview with Monica Packer from the About Progress Podcast. Monica interviews Jennifer addressing the importance of self-development (developing our gifts and capacities) to forge a stronger sense of self.
Monica Packer from the About Progress Podcast interviews Dr. Finlayson-Fife about body image and gaining greater self confidence.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife speaks with life/relationship coach Trina Glines all about being a whole woman.
Dr. Finlayson-Fife speaks with life/relationship coach Trina Glines all about being a whole woman.
Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Lindsay Aerts from The Mom Show on KSL Radio to discuss how to talk with your kids about sex and abuse.
Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Lindsay Aerts from The Mom Show on KSL Radio to discuss how to talk with your kids about sex and abuse.
Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Lindsay Aerts from The Mom Show on KSL Radio to discuss what factors can affect desire in women and how you can overcome some of them.
Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Lindsay Aerts from The Mom Show on KSL Radio to discuss how to create a culture of openness around sex and sexuality so your kids will be more likely to adopt healthy views of their own. And don't worry if you have older kids, Dr. Fife says it's never too late to start implementing healthy attitudes around sex, or repairing any well-intended missteps.
Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Lindsay Aerts from The Mom Show on KSL Radio to discuss how you can help teach your kids about sex without making them feel like it's a bad thing or that they are bad for being curious.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife speaks with Sherrae Phelps of Ten Thousand Hours of Writing Podcast about how to respect the differing views and beliefs of others as well as how to approach difficult or uncomfortable conversations about religious topics.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife speaks with Sherrae Phelps of Ten Thousand Hours of Writing Podcast about how to respect the differing views and beliefs of others as well as how to approach difficult or uncomfortable conversations about religious topics.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife speaks with Sherrae Phelps of Ten Thousand Hours of Writing Podcast about the topic of indulgent suffering. In this episode you will learn more about how to act out of virtue and integrity and how to let go of immature thought patterns that can be harmful to personal development.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife speaks with Sherrae Phelps of Ten Thousand Hours of Writing Podcast about the topic of thinking for ourselves. In this episode you will learn more about how to make your own decisions based on your integrity and moral compass rather than approval of others.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife is interviewed by Sherrae Phelps on her podcast Ten Thousand Hours of Writing. They discuss the different “versions” of forgiveness and how to forgive in a way that is healing and not harmful.
In this episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife is interviewed by Rachel Nielson the host of the 3 in 30 Podcast for moms. They discuss why your sex drive may have decreased post kids and marriage, as well as what you can do to get it back.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife speaks with Sherrae Phelps of Ten Thousand Hours of Writing Podcast about the topic of submission. In this episode you will learn more about what submission means and how it can be driven either by fear or moral courage.
In this episode, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife is interviewed by holistic nutritionist and eating psychology coach, Stephanie Webb all about how to create and maintain a sexual sense of self while in the throes of motherhood.
Part two of a discussion with Dan Wotherspoon, Charles Randall Paul, Joseph Stanford, and Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife on the meaning of covenants in religious practice, and particularly the meaning of covenants when one's faith has evolved or shifted.
A discussion with Dan Wotherspoon, Charles Randall Paul, Joseph Stanford, and Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife on the meaning of covenants in religious practice, and particularly the meaning of covenants when one's faith has evolved or shifted.
Mormon Matters Podcast invited Dr. Finlayson-Fife to participate in this panel discussion regarding the treatment of the concepts of obedience and agency in the Church. In this episode, Mormon Matters host Dan Wotherspoon and panelists Jennifer Finlayson-Fife, Chelsea Fife, and Michael Fife discuss the topic of obedience and integrity.