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How do we know if our marriage is worth saving? Great question. Don’t most couples hit a brick wall some time along the way?

The extrovert and the introvert figuring it out together.If you know me at all, you know I prefer fun. Don’t we all? But today, I’m sharing 2 Serious Videos that answer 2 serious questions.

• “How do I know if my marriage is worth saving?”
• “Forgiving my spouse feels impossible after what’s happened. How can I even begin to heal?”

I’m not a counselor. I’ve never even played a counselor on TV. I just share “Mom Opinions.”

Maybe Mom Opinion is too fancy for what I do. I share stories from my own years of experience (many, many long, long years) that hopefully other people can relate to.

Refuse to be IsolatedWhy do I continue to share such personal stories? THAT is an excellent question. The answer: So none of us have to feel alone as we try to figure out the hard stuff.

David and I decided to share because nobody told us they were suffering, too, until it was almost too late for our marriage.

Bluntly, when we needed encouragement, it was hard to find. Did everyone else have a perfect marriage and family, except us?

Once we admitted to some close friends how bad things had gotten, some people actually laughed! Yes, laughed! Like it was no big deal. Fine. It felt like a big deal to me.

As I began to share my own story, other women began to tell theirs, too. Quietly. In whispers. With tears and heartbreak and much prayer.

Thankfully, we got some great advice. And prayer. Along with the chuckles at our naivete.

So now we keep sharing. Me, the extrovert of the family, doing most of the sharing. David, the introvert, listening, encouraging, and praying. Both of us putting aside false shame to be vulnerable. Not easy, but oh-so-worth-it.

Serious Video #1: A Marriage Worth Saving“How do I know if my marriage is worth saving?”I hope there are moments in your marriage that light up your heart. But even if you can’t think of them in this exact moment, listen to the next serious video, too, please. It includes an action plan you can apply immediately.

Serious Video #2“Forgiving my spouse feels impossible after what’s happened. How can I even begin to heal?”

Please don’t throw away your marriage in a fit of marriage fatigue. If you are in danger, obviously, seek safety immediately. No matter what, you owe it to yourself to safely take the time you need to process. Please consider seeking the kind of professional or religious counseling that will help you in your personal situation.

Serious Videos, Seriously PersonalSometimes people ask me seriously if I give marriage advice. The answer is, “No, I think I’m very bad at marriage!”

Or, maybe marriage is just harder than I expected. Or maybe, like I often say, I am an expert on sin. (There are moments when Dave would definitely agree. 🤣)

Seriously, though, marriage is a seriously personal process. It takes two people. And it can get very lonely.

Here are some quick ideas that may help, especially when you feel isolated:

• Many churches and communities offer free or affordable professional counseling.
• Seek out like-minded people willing to commit, like a family group at church or trustworthy friends.
• If you strike out with friends at first, hang in there. Other people are looking and you will find each other.
• When you find a trustworthy friend, initiate get-togethers but be flexible. People are busy.
• Share slowly and carefully at first to establish trust.
• Never repeat a confidence. Trust is a two-way street.
• Surround yourself with folks who speak positive comments over your life, not negative ones.
• Tune in to our blogs, podcasts, and books for much more.
• Find more marriage videos here and here and here.

Beyond Serious Videos: Called to ShareI started out feeling called to share about how I got emotionally and spiritually well after an abortion.

Believe me, going public with that info was a very big decision. It affected everyone in our family. If you’ve been blessed by our family’s decision, please tell my grown kids when you see them. If it helped you, it will be worth it to them.

But please don’t assume my grandkids know because we let them grow up first.

From there, we expanded to marriage, parenting, family, and culture. The common denominator we soon discovered, is our love of communicating effectively. So now we commit to change culture one conversation at a time. The hard conversations we call conversational adventures because they take courage. And patience.

What’s Next? More Sacred MomentsWe are creating new resources and sharing them just as fast as we can. Since communication in families is always our focus, we are currently wrapping up a manuscript focused on crafts, character, and conversations with kids. Really delightful stuff!

I hope you are surrounded by people whose stories encourage you. My prayer is you share your own stories generously. I know what a blessing it is to me when someone comes up to tell me a story no one else knows. These are sacred moments I cherish.

You are very dear to my heart.

🙂CathyWhy Men Crave Sex? The Answer Will Surprise YouIf you missed last week’s blog about why men crave sex, please go to it now. Seriously! I share Grace English’s podcast with Chris Legg and another video from my collection of embarrassing stories on myself.

Let’s Pray TogetherDear good Father, at this moment, people could be feeling like divorce is the only option. Isolation is Satan’s favorite trick. Help us resist the enemy. Please comfort us all now with Your presence. Marriage is hard, but it is meant to reflect Your glory, Your tenderness. Give us courage to have the conversations we need to have. And patience as we wait for You to answer prayers. Sometimes our prayers are so painful we don’t have words for them. Thank You for being our tender Companion and Savior of our souls. If anyone reading these words does not understand them, please bring someone today who can explain about Your beautiful Son’s death and resurrection. Bless us now, please, because that is Your heart’s desire. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

We love to hear from YOU!How could your church stir up more true fellowship and support marriages better? What is your favorite way to stand against feelings of isolation? Would you share good ideas or questions for future videos?

Do you belong to a small church in need of FREE resources, like books, Bible Studies, and speakers? If yes, please contact me!

Please Pray AND Buy BooksOne of the BEST ways you can help us change the conversation around marriage in our culture is to buy books. Seriously.

Together we can change the culture one conversation at a time. That starts in our own families. (Find more videos here.)

I truly believe for those who want to reboot their marriage and rediscover the marriage of their dreams, Marriage Conversations is terrific! I am so thankful to CrossRiver Media for all their help with it. So, please share my book with those you love. (And don’t miss the one I wrote about last week from author, pastor, counselor Chris Legg.)

This month, CrossRiver Media is doing a full blitz of my book, Marriage Conversations. (You can get the first chapter FREE here.) PLEASE share all the videos, memes, podcasts, or articles CrossRiver is creating this month. Thank you very much.

And speaking of isolation, we LOVE all the ways Jesus took a woman from isolation to influence. In one conversation. I explored His communication techniques in The Well. Special thanks to Elk Lake Publishing for The Well.

FREE Resources for Small ChurchesIf I can serve you or your church in any way, I hope you will let me. Contact me, if you want to know more about:

• how to sponsor resources for small churches to grow in better communication, or
• how to cultivate better communication in your church.

Thank you for sharing my books with your friends. The Well: The Art of Drawing Out Authentic Conversations. or Marriage Conversations: From Coexisting to Cherished. To join the Fireside Tribe and receive our FREE weekly interviews, blogs, and podcasts, hit the yellow button below.

If you love the books and want to get them for your Bible Study or Sunday school or, heck, any group, just let me know. My publishers allow us to offer group discounts.

Click here to find our books: Marriage Conversations: from co-existing to cherished, The Well: The Art of Drawing Out Authentic Conversations

❤️ You’re Invited to Join the Fireside Tribe ❤️❤️ ❤️ ❤️

Hope for the Weary: James 4:6-10“But He gives more grace. Therefore He says:

‘God resists the proud,
But gives grace to the humble.’

Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Lament and mourn and weep! Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He will lift you up.”

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Ever wonder why men crave sex? Of course. We’re told some pretty simple stuff about why men crave sex. Like it’s hormones. Or, because God wants humans to reproduce. Okay. But why then are we losing generation after generation of teenage boys to brokenhearted, misguided sexual relationships? And that’s among Christians.

More great podcasts and videos in today’s blog!One of the best answers I’ve seen, came from Chris Legg, co-author of Sex and Marriage. (His son, Mark Legg, is his co-author. You gotta admit, writing a book about sex together took some gumption for both of them!)

Deep in the Heart Founder Dr. Grace English, host of Get Real to Heal interviewed Chris on this topic of why men crave sex last week. Leave it to Grace to ask tough questions we all want to know the answer to.

If you are married or raising boys, this is for YOU! Because I get how hard it is.

Surprisingly, you won’t find this info anywhere else. Believe me I searched. I lost count of how many books I read researching my book, Marriage Conversations.

Spreading the Real Reason Men Crave SexIn their conversation, Chris explains why men crave sex. You are going to love what he says.

Chris’s book, Sex and Marriage, is one of my all time favorites. I’ve given it away to friends too many times to count.

Because a lot of hubbies don’t read marriage books, I really want you to have their podcast. So today, I’m embedding their podcast for you.

Trusting God with marriage is hard. We need all the help we can get.

Super-duper SexThen, right before their podcast aired, I got a text from Grace. They mentioned my marriage book in their conversation together on Get Real to Heal. Yep. That’s a high point for me. Two of my favorite people. So naturally I listened in.

Chris retold one of my stories.

I’m embedding that story today, too. A special shout out to my friends at Christian Communicators who recorded this story long before my book came out. Thank you!

Dave and I think it’s hilarious. We hope you enjoyed it, too.

Behind the Scenes: Insider Info for Book WritingBy the way, at the end of their podcast, Chris mentions a very talented writer and his co-author, Mark Legg. Is it bragging when dad is just telling the truth about a talented son? Anyway, I say, “Amen!”

I got to see Sex and Marriage before Mark got involved. That’s how I knew Mark’s skill level is off the chart.

Chris’s initial content was life-changing, marriage-changing, no doubt. But Chris’ writing reflects how fast his brain works. Would you believe me if I told you the man can think and write even faster than he can talk?

Fortunately, Mark’s genius is in bringing clarity and all his scholarly training to bear on refining a book. Wow!

On a side note, Anna and I are pretty delighted to have Mark’s help on our next book. It’s for moms and grandmothers who want use crafts and conversation to bring out the good character in their beautiful kiddos.

Is it selfish of me to think if I brag on Mark too much, he might get too busy for me? Okay, that’s rhetorical. I know the answer.

Anyway, if you need help with a book, you can find Mark here. Plus, my dear friend and editor, Deb Butterfield is taking on clients. I bet there’s a line forming for her services, too. So, if you are writing a manuscript, contact them now to get on their schedules.

Fellowship is the Best Foreplay: ChosenIn Marriage Conversations, I also write a chapter I originally called, “Fellowship is the Best Foreplay.” We went with a different title, “Chosen.” But, well, I’ll have to write another book, just to use that title!

But seriously, fellowship is not just a church party without alcohol. True fellowship is grounded in a commitment to keep loving each with unfailing love. In marriage, fellowship is foundational to oneness.

But fellowship will also permeate all aspects of our lives–all our relationships–when we commit to loving others with the love Jesus freely and graciously offers each one of us.

Did you know Jesus has already chosen you, if you will but choose Him?

If having fellowship with Jesus sounds strange to you, today is a GREAT day to ask Him to be your Savior. Like so many Christians have already done, YOU can pray a simple prayer to ask Jesus to forgive you for your sins and come into your life.

Shout out to my beloved niece, Cassie, and her dear friend, Brooke, who delighted me by stopping by for a sweet moment of fellowship while they were at Pine Cove!I like what Franklin Graham has to say about choosing the God who already chose us. Yep, Jesus is the most wonderful person to ever walk the face of the earth. He’s powerful enough to die for sinners and then live to tell about it!

🙂CathyWe love to hear from YOU!When do you experience the most fellowship in your most significant relationship? How could your church stir up more true fellowship and support marriages better? Do you belong to a small church in need of FREE resources, like books, Bible Studies, and speakers?

Would you be kind enough to send me good questions for future videos? If yes, please contact me!

Let’s Pray TogetherDear good Father, Thank You for sending Your Son to die on the cross for each of us who will receive the gift. You invite us into the most beautiful fellowship to ever exist, fellowship with You, the divine Creator. Then, because we begin to take after You, our good Father, we begin to experience fellowship in all our relationships. Marriage is where fellowship can seem the hardest. We know Satan schemes against us. Protect and strengthen us to resist the devil’s attacks. Bless us now, please, because that is Your heart’s desire. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

Please keep reading: the answer to the question, why do men crave sex is at the end of today’s blog.

Please Pray AND Buy BooksOne of the BEST ways you can help us change the conversation around marriage in our culture is to buy books. Seriously.

Together we can change the culture one conversation at a time. That starts in our own families. (Find more videos here.)

Please share excellent books like mine and Chris’ with those you love.

I truly believe for those who want to reboot their marriage and rediscover the marriage of their dreams, Marriage Conversations is terrific! I am so thankful to CrossRiver Media for all their help with it.

This month, CrossRiver Media is doing a full blitz of my book, Marriage Conversations. (You can get the first chapter FREE here.) PLEASE share all the videos, memes, podcasts, or articles CrossRiver is creating this month. Thank you very much.

And we LOVE all the ways Jesus took a woman from isolation to influence in one conversation, which I explored in The Well. Special thanks to Elk Lake Publishing for The Well.

FREE Resources for Small ChurchesIf I can serve you or your church in any way, I hope you will let me. Contact me, if you want to know more about:

• how to sponsor resources for small churches to grow in better communication, or
• how to cultivate better communication in your church.

Thank you for sharing my books with your friends. The Well: The Art of Drawing Out Authentic Conversations. or Marriage Conversations: From Coexisting to Cherished. To join the Fireside Tribe and receive our FREE weekly interviews, blogs, and podcasts, hit the yellow button below.

If you love the books and want to get them for your Bible Study or Sunday school or, heck, any group, just let me know. My publishers allow us to offer group discounts.

Click here to find our books: Marriage Conversations: from co-existing to cherished, The Well: The Art of Drawing Out Authentic Conversations

❤️ You’re Invited to Join the Fireside Tribe ❤️❤️ ❤️ ❤️

Why Men Crave Sex? The Answer Will Surprise YouYou read to the end of the blog. I think you deserve the answer.

I’m in a quandary, though. First, I hate it when people bait and switch with a headline and then don’t answer the question. But, secondly, I hate to give away a pretty important punchline in Chris’ book without all the research and wisdom he uses to back it up.

Here’s my solution. I’m gonna tell ya what I think is the most mind-blowing thing I learned in Sex and Marriage:

Men crave sex because they crave home.

That info changes everything about how we receive our hubby and how we raise our sons. Chris explains it alot better than that. So, promise me, you won’t cheat yourself out of listening to the Get Real to Heal podcast or buying his book.

Please, pleeeease do yourself a favor and get ALL there is to know on this subject! This is conversation-family-culture changing info! We’re in it together.

Thanks for reading to the end. Love ya! ❤️ Cathy

Cathy Krafve, host of Fireside Talk Radio and author of The Well: The Art of Drawing Out Authentic Conversations and Marriage Conversation: From Coexisting to Cherished. Your stories, ideas, and questions welcomed here!

❤️ Truth with a Texas Twang! ❤️The post Why Men Crave Sex? The Answer Will Surprise You appeared first on Cathy Krafve.

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A very special event is happening in April. Maybe, like me, your heart is full of redemption and restoration because Resurrection Day is around the corner! If so, Inside Out Church will knock your socks off!

❤️ ❤️ ❤️ Happy Easter! ❤️ ❤️ ❤️Special Event: Inside Out ChurchGalilee Baptist Church is co-hosting a special time of worship for three Sundays’ in a row, April 7, 14, and 21st, called Inside Out Church. The idea is to get outside, get together, and revel in God’s creation.

Please pray for nice weather!

South Spring and First Baptist of Tyler and Corinth Baptist and New Hope Baptist of Bullard are co-hosting.

Adding to the fun, Galilee’s neighbor, Pine Cove Christian Camps, is providing hotdogs. Our friends at Jasper Ventures are providing dessert.

Lynne and I talk about Inside Out Church . We’re hoping our neighbors know they are welcome!On those 3 Sundays, we’ll bring our camp chairs, worship together outside, then fellowship over lunch. The idea is to let our neighbors know churches are there to serve. All are welcome.

Special Event: Us On KLTV!My friend, Lynne Reddic and I got to talk to KLTV about WHY Galilee is co-hosting Inside Out Church. We’re sending a special thanks to KLTV’s Devyn Shea and Amanda Gadison who made television interviewing so simple and fun! Click here to find the interview. More about Galilee here.

Plus, Deep In the HeartOnce I got over the shock of sending out a blog with info about a marriage conference that’s been rescheduled, I realized I could go to the Deep in the Heart Women’s Conference the same weekend.

At Deep in the Heart, there will be tons of inspiring speakers. But I’m particularly overjoyed to hear my dear friends, Mo and Doug McSwane, speak together about how grief affects families. I have witnessed them build a beautiful life in the midst of sorrow. Doug came on Fireside Talk Radio and talked about A Child’s Mental Health and Suicide with Doug McSwane.

Of all my podcasts, this is the one I muted so listeners wouldn’t have to hear me sob as Doug spoke. Their beautiful daughter, Marcie, came on in a powerful podcast called, Suicide and Comfort for Siblings with Marcie McSwane.

I checked with Grace English and there are still spots left as of today. Here’s the link for more info and the link to sign up. I hope I see you there!

Special Event; Special CommunityDave and I are so happy to have fun events to look forward to as we go into Spring. Special events call for special people, to plan, to imagine, to speak, to listen, to sing. To simply be together.

I hope we’ll see you there! Because you are dear to my heart.

🙂cathyMay we pray together?Dear good Father, we want to live like You love us, especially in our homes and our churches. Especially in our neighborhoods and our communities. Teach us to love each other. Help us reflect Your unfailing love in our marriages and in our communities. Give us great ways to communicate with each other. Help us worship You as we go through our days by loving others well. Bless us now because that is Your heart’s desire. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

My Personal Prayer RequestGod has put it on my heart to provide resources to small churches.

I am also praying about spending more of my time in 2024 offering resources to small churches, especially in my own neck of the woods. Contact me, if you want to know more about how to:

• cultivate better communication in your church, or
• sponsor resources for small churches to grow in better communication.

We LOVE to Hear From YOU!If you could have anything new in your marriage, what would it be? Which ways does your church family demonstrate God’s love to you? Would you be interested in helping us bring communication resources to small churches? If so, keep reading below. ❤️

So Many ResourcesSpeaking of great resources, Anna and I do tons of fun stuff together. Hit the Conversations with Anna Button for the list. We create tools and resources so you can spark up great conversational adventures.

And, don’t miss our experts. I love getting them on record about the stuff we don’t usually talk about at church!

❤️ You’re Invited to Join the Fireside Tribe ❤️Thanks to Elk Lake Publishing.Thanks to CrossRiver Media.Thank you for sharing my books with your friends. The Well: The Art of Drawing Out Authentic Conversations. or Marriage Conversations: From Coexisting to Cherished. To join the Fireside Tribe and receive our FREE weekly interviews, blogs, and podcasts, hit the yellow button.

If you love the books and want to get them for your Bible Study or Sunday school or, heck, any group, just let me know. My publishers allow us to offer group discounts

Click here to find our books: Marriage Conversations: from co-existing to cherished, The Well: The Art of Drawing Out Authentic Conversations

❤️❤️❤️

Cathy Krafve, host of Fireside Talk Radio and author of The Well: The Art of Drawing Out Authentic Conversations and Marriage Conversation: From Coexisting to Cherished. We welcome your stories, ideas, and questions at CathyKrafve.com.

❤️Truth with a Texas Twang! ❤️The post Special Event in April: Inside Out Church, All are Welcome appeared first on Cathy Krafve.

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When everybody else told us to build a platform for Camp Krafve, God told us to build a catapult. Because of His wisdom, we had conversations with so many wonderful expert guests. It really blows my mind how God blesses us when we let Him!

To make it easy for you to find your favorite experts, we’ve listed them below in alphabetical order. Easy to find in one little button on our home page, too!

Best of all, we’re catapulting their stories and wisdom out into the universe where others can find them.

Each time you share one, you, too, are helping. Thank you for putting positive messages out there in a world that is hurting! What a privilege to be in this together with YOU!

In Other NewsTwo of my friends in the publishing world (via CrossRiver Media) just got amazing jump starts for their books. I am so proud of both Lori Ann Wood and Deb Butterfield. You can find their books here.

Lori Ann Wood earned a first place award in the Book Fest Award category for nonfiction>religion Christianity for Divine Detour!

Then, to make life even more exciting, Deb’s book, Self-editing & Publishing Tips for the Indie Author made #1 New Release on Amazon. Quite an accomplishment! You can find Deb’s podcasts below.

Conversations with Expert Guests A-CMichelle Medlock AdamsSassy Faith: Her Wisdom with Michelle Medlock Adams

Platinum Faith: Trusting the God who Loves Us, Her Story with Michelle Medlock Adams

Sandra BeckSingle and Strong: How to be Your Family’s Champion with Sandra Beck

Single and Strong: When is Enough Enough with Sandra Beck

Lindsey BellNobody escapes pain in this world. We can learn from suffering with Lindsey Bell, Her Wisdom

Unbeaten by Pain: A Beautiful Life in the Midst of Miscarriage with Lindsey Bell, Her Story

Lori BoruffFreedom and Our Kids. Her Wisdom: How to Respond When Your Child Goes to Jail with Lori

Freedom and Our Kids. Her Story: When They Lead Your Son Away in Handcuffs with Lori Boruff

Robin BoydCare Giving: Making the Most of Multigenerational Families with Robin Boyd

Care Giving: Ripple Effect of Respecting Elders with Robin Boyd

Catherine Ulrich BrakefieldHoliday Romance under Your Tree? Catherine Ulrich Brakefield Shares Her Wisdom

Romance Writer With a Swept Off Her Feet Story! with Catherine Ulrich Brakefield

Sandra BristowSafe and Secure. Her Wisdom: The Value of Intuition and Healing in Community with Sandy

Safe and Secure. Her Story: Escaping a Sexual Predator with Sandy Bristow

Deb ButterfieldCarried By Grace: When Sexual Abuse Happens in Your Home with Deb Butterfield, Her Wisdom

Mothers of Victims of Sexual Abuse: Carried by Grace with Deb Butterfield, Her Story

Katie ButtsUnexpected Parenting. Her Wisdom: How to Encourage Families with Unexpected Differences with Katie Butts

Unexpected Parenting. Her Story: When an Infant’s Physical Disability is Diagnosed During Pregnancy

Charlotte CanionParenting Your Parents: Learning to Laugh Together with Charlotte Canion, Her Wisdom

Please God! How do I take Care of Myself, too? Forgiving, Loving, and Care-giving Your Parents With Charlotte Canion

Beauty Beyond Bones’s CaralynAnorexia and Freedom: No Exceptions with Beauty Beyond Bones’s Caralyn, Her Wisdom

Anorexia: Blessed and Beautiful with Beauty Beyond Bones’s Caralyn, Her Story

Becky CarpenterRunning into Heaven: 3 Tips for Coping with Grief and Suffering with Becky Carpenter Her Wisdom

Devastating Moments, Crisis, and Suffering: When God Lights Up the Sky with Becky Carpenter Her Story

Andy ClappNew Season of Hope: 3 Tips to Refresh Your Soul with Andy Clapp, His Wisdom

New Beginnings and Joy: Spring into Hope with Andy Clapp, His Story

Carole ClarkAll Rise for Justice, Trauma Informed Care with Judge Carole Clark

CPS Worker to Judge: Trauma Informed Care with Judge Carole Clark

Tamara ClymerBattle Ready Marriage: 8 Tips for Preparing Your Family for Any Challenge, Even Brain Cancer, With Tamara Clymer, Her Wisdom

Battle Ready Faith: For Battles You Don’t Expect to Fight, EVEN Brain Cancer, With Tamara Clymer

Stanley CoferRacial Unity. His Wisdom: The Empowered Community with Stanley Cofer

Racial Unity. His Story: The Desegregated Life with Stanley Cofer

Alise CortezLive with Passion, Work on Purpose with Dr. Alise Cortez, Her Wisdom

Her Story: Path to Passion and Purpose with Dr. Alise Cortez

Susan CoxRebooting a Marriage: Re/Engage with Humility to Melt Hearts of Stone with Susan Cox, Her Wisdom

Broken Marriage? Re/Engage Even in the Worst Crisis with Susan Cox, Her Story

Sarah CummingJoy in Education. Her Wisdom: Justice for All with Sarah Cumming

Joy in Education. Her Story: Love, Education, Justice, and a Woman in Community with Sarah Cumming

Conversations with Expert Guests D-JDeb DeArmondMother-in-law, Daughter-in-law, Mentoring: Relationships Can Go Right! Deb DeArmond

Family Fatigue: Building Back Better Families in 2022 with Deb DeArmond

James DillTips for Finding Trustworthy Friendship, His Wisdom Pastor James Dill

The Shepherd’s Heart: Don’t Give UP, His Story Pastor James Dill

Jon DruryFreedom for Men. His Wisdom: How Wives can Battle for their Husband’s Significance with Jon

Freedom for Men. His Story: How Successful Men Battle for Significance With Jon Drury

Susan EllsworthCare Giving: Oncology Nurse Beats Breast Cancer with Susan Ellsworth

Care Giving: After Breast Cancer, What I Wish My Family Understood with Susan Ellsworth

Grace EnglishCompassion Please, One Beloved Doctor’s Story of Abortion with Dr. Grace English

Compassion, Please! Healing After Abortion with Dr. Grace English, Her Wisdom

Kristin Faith EvansDark Clouds Threaten: Keeping the Sunshine of Joy with Kristin Faith Evans Her Wisdom

The Dark Place of Suicide or Mommy Care? Oxygen and Comfort for Mom with Kristin Faith

Dawn FranksWomen of Influence, Her Story: Generosity as an Inheritance with Dawn Franks

Women of Influence, Her Wisdom: Giving Fingerprints with Dawn Franks

Brooke FrickMotherhood: Encouraging Yourself in a Hands Full Life with Brooke Frick, Her Wisdom

Hands Full: Humor and Inspiration for Devoted Mommies with Brooke Frick, Her Story

B.J. GarrettHow Abortion Affects the Church and Community: Her Wisdom with CARE Executive Director B.J.

Symptoms of Post-Abortion and Sexual Trauma Syndrome: Her Story with CARE Executive

Dana GoodrumOpen with Your Broken with Dana Goodrum, Her Story

The Transparent Christian with Dana Goodrum, Reckless Pursuit, Her Wisdom

Nancy Kay GraceGrace-filled Families: The Grace Impact on Family with Nancy Kay Grace Her Wisdom

Feel Overwhelmed? The Grace Impact Changes Everything with Nancy Kay Grace, Her Story

Jeanette HanscomeSuddenly Single Mom with Jeanette Hanscome, Her Wisdom

Surprised by Divorce with Jeanette Hanscome, Her Story

Sandra Merville HartOutside the Box. Her Wisdom, Translating Compassion into Fiction Writing with Sandra

Outside the Box. Her Story, Discovering the Writer Within featuring Sandra Merville Hart

Barb and Dave HoweFreedom for Men. Their Wisdom: Success in the Battle for Purity with Dave Howe

Freedom for Men: Their Story: Living Pure with Dave and Barb Howe

SharRon JamisonHow to be a Friend Maker with SharRon Jamison, Her Wisdom

Antidote to the Mean Girl Syndrome with SharRon Jamison, Her Story

Tony JohnsonFatherhood: Myth-busting about Mentoring with Tony Johnson

Fatherhood: Qualified to Mentor with Tony Johnson

Conversations with Expert Guests K-MNeal KatzUnity in Community. His Wisdom: Separation of Church and State with Neal Katz

Unity in Community. His Story: The Spirituality of Service, with Neal Katz

Jason KarpfSci-Fi: Bring Generations Together at Church

Science Fiction: More Adventures to Come! with Jason Karpf

James KempGrowing Up Apprenticed by an Artist Dad with James Kemp, His Story

Legacy Building through Art and Chess with James Kemp

Scott KedershaHealthy Marriage: Ready or Knot to Grow Strong Marriages with Scott Kedersha, His Wisdom

Wholehearted Marriages: Conversations for the Strong at Heart with Scott Kedersha, His Story

Erin KerryBalance: the Brain-Gut Connection and the Secret of Mental Health with Erin Kerry, Her Wisdom

Mental Illness and Sparking Wholeness: Erin Kerry’s Story

Ashley KutachSelf-awareness vs. Blind Spots with Ashley Kutach, Her Wisdom

Overcoming Blind Spots with Ashley Kutach, Her Story

DeeDee LakeTalking to Teenage Daughters: Tips for Tuning In with DeeDee Lake

Next Step: Creating the Right Conversations with Your Daughter with DeeDee Lake

Michelle LazurekControl and Perfectionism: Surrendering For God To Do the Impossible with Michelle Lazurek

Anxiety and Depression: I Surrender All (Sort Of) With Michele Lazurek, Her Story

Chris LeggFatherhood. His Wisdom, Easy Ways to Transform Your Parenting with Chris Legg

Fatherhood. His Story: How Talk of Suicide Changed His Perspective on Ministry with Chris Legg

Colleen LongMental Health,Her Story: Depression or Anxiety vs. Exercise and Self-Compassion with Colleen Long

Mental Health, Her Wisdom: Stretching Beyond to Confidence and Energy with Colleen Long

Robin LuftigCalm in a Crisis: Faith Tested By Fire With Robin Luftig

God’s Best During Your Worst with Robin Luftig

Rosie MaKinney“Porn-Proofing” Your Kids: Fighting for Love with Rosie MaKinney

The Big P, “Porn Addiction”: Fighting for Love and Intimacy with Rosie MaKinney, Her Story

Darlene MarshallSingle and Strong. Her Wisdom: Excellence and Influence after Divorce with Darlene Marshall

Single and Strong. Her Story: Serving God with Excellence when Mental Illness Strikes Your Family with Darlene Marshall

Toie Martin5 Steps to Change with Toie Martin, Her Wisdom

Positive Change, A Leap of Faith with Toie Martin, Her Story

James McAndrewE.D. Treatments: Wives CAN Help with Dr. James McAndrew, His Wisdom

E.D.: No Gimmicks, Just Straight Answers from Dr. James McAndrew, Plus His Story

Janet McHenryForgive Relentlessly, Praying in the Face of Injustice with Janet McHenry, Her Wisdom

The Not-So-Normal Life of Prayerwalking Janet McHenry, Her Story

Marcie McSwaneFamilies and Suicide. Her Wisdom: Celebrating the Beautiful Life of A Sibling with Marcie

Family and Suicide. Her Story: How Siblings Suffer and Heal with Marcie McSwane

Doug McSwaneFamily and Suicide. His Wisdom: When Mental Illness Strikes Your Family with Doug McSwane

Family and Suicide. His Story: A Father’s Story of his Son’s Suicide with Doug McSwane

Tina MeierBullying in School, The Story of Megan Meier with Tina Meier

Bullying in School, Her Wisdom with Tina Meier, How to Help Our Kids

Robin MelvinConversations with Expert Guests N-SMary OttmanTaboo Topics. Her Wisdom: Easy Does It; Passing Along Hard-Won Wisdom with Mary

Taboo Topics. Her Story: Sexual Assault and Courage with Mary Ottman

Whitney PattersonRaising Creative Kids. Her Wisdom: Fostering a Community Filled with Scientific Discovery

Raising Creative Kids. Her Story: Giving Them a Childhood Filled with Wonder, with Whitney Patterson

Frankie PicassoCare Giving: The Collision of Life and Art in Chronic Pain with Frankie Picasso

Care Giving: Art as Therapy in Community with Frankie Picasso

Anna Krafve PierceLook for all Anna’s episodes on the end of this list

Miles PikeInspiring Through Music: Winning the Heart of Your Child with Miles Pike, His Wisdom

Harmony in Marriage: Choosing a United Mission with Miles Pike

Paula QuinnBlaming God? The Tender Questions God Asks Us with Paula Quinn

God’s Tender Questions: Ever Wonder What God Asks Us? with Paula Quinn

Angie RuarkThe Sisterhood of Warrior Women: Praying Friends with Angie Ruark, Her Wisdom

Spiritual Warrior Women: Devoted to Prayer with Angie Ruark, Her Story

Mike SahnoEntrepreneurship and How to Launch a Book or a Business with Mike Sahno

Henda SalmeronHer Story: When Stressful Life Calls for Grit with Henda Salmeron, Dense Breast Tissue

Her Wisdom: Dense Breast Tissue and Henda’s Law with Henda Salmeron

Marina SchroederSafe and Secure. Her Wisdom: Balancing our Finances to Create Multigenerational Wealth

Safe and Secure. Her Story: Overcoming Stress to Own Our Success with Marina Schroeder

Ben SciaccaRacial Unity. His Wisdom: Meals from Mars, When Two Universes Collide with Ben Sciacca

Racial Unity. His Story: Overcoming Racism with Unity, with Meals from Mars author, Ben Sciacca

Danny SessumsRaising History-Loving Kids with Danny Sessums, Ph.D.

Growing Up a History Nerd with Danny Sessums, Ph.D.

Jack SharpeSearching Out the Glory in Each Other: Cherishing Your Marriage with Jack Sharpe

Resurrecting Books: Values that Unite with Jack Sharpe

Suzy ShepherdRelationship SuperHeroes. Where Love Lives with Suzy Shepherd

Relationship SuperHeroes. Her Story: Brokenness and Beyond with Suzy Shepherd

Paula SilvaDomestic Violence: Anchoring Sisters with Paula Silva Her Wisdom

Domestic Violence In the Church: Her Story with Paula Silva

Benjamin A. SimpsonRelationship SuperHeroes. His Story: Making Good Decisions for Your Family

Relationship SuperHeroes. His Wisdom: Tallying Family Values with Benjamin A. Simpson

Conversations with Expert Guests T-ZCynthia TobiasStrong Willed Women Working Together Her Wisdom with Cynthia Tobias

Called to Education in Style, Her Story with Cynthia Tobias

Ellen Krafve TrantThe Search for Intimacy, Personal Stories with Cathy and co-host, Ellen Krafve Trant

Gratitude, Communicating with Wisdom, Co-Host Ellen Trant and Cathy in a Personal Conversation

James Van DykeEntrepreneurship. His Wisdom: Stewarding Resources and Relationships with James Van Dyke

Entrepreneurship. His Story: Digging into the Environmental Dirt with James Van Dyke

Sarah Van HookRebuilding Relationships After Sexual Abuse with Sarah Van Hook

Sexual Abuse: Claiming Victory Over Darkness with Sarah Van Hook

Sasha VukeljaHer Wisdom, What Happens When Mom has Breast Cancer? with Sasha Vukelja, Care Giving

Her Story: Seeds of Generational Care Giving with Sasha Vukelja

Neita Fran WardWomen of Influence. Her Story: Discovering the Artist Within with Neita Fran Ward

Women of Influence. Her Wisdom: Unleashing Creativity with Neita Fran Ward

Stan WardRefueling Our Hearts When Burn-out Strikes with Dr. Stan Ward

Beating Burn Out: Conquering In Community with Dr. Stan Ward, His Story

Lathan WattsSecuring Religious Liberty: Recent Victories and Pending Battles with Lathan Watts, His Wisdom

Raising Liberty Loving Kids with Lathan Watts, His Story

Tammy WhitehurstPerfection Ain’t Pretty with Tammy Whitehurst, Her Wisdom

Joy for Life’s Journey with Tammy Whitehurst Her Story

Andrea WilsonHomelessness: A Compassionate PATH to Help with Andrea Wilson, Her Wisdom

Civic-Minded Kids: PATH for the Next Generation with Andrea Wilson, Her Story

Bobbie ZiemerDrug Addiction and Your Child: You are NOT Alone with Bobbie Ziemer, Her Wisdom

The Drug Pandemic. Not in Vain: Real Addiction. Real Pain. With Bobbie Ziemer, Her Story

❤️*Conversations with Anna Krafve Pierce*❤️Anna and I have so much fun laughing together. Half the time she’s offering me correction in the kindest way imaginable. I’m just so dang proud of the way my kids have grown into compassionate, kind, creative, confident adults. I hope you laugh with us and wink at some of her surprising and delightful stories!

Conversations With Anna About Reading and EducationMy mom and I with Anna and her new baby girl. Anna loves sharing stories about her kids. Find The Well and Marriage Conversations.* Maps and Signs: Boost Your Child’s Reading Confidence with Anna Krafve Pierce * Healthy Ambition: Sparking Self-motivation in Kids with Anna Krafve Pierce * “Clean Up Your Room!” Curating Your Child’s Collections * Recipes to Teach Hospitality and Reading: Welcome to My Kitchen * Bedtime Stories and Pajama Parties: Inspiring Your Kids to Love Reading * Memoirs for Kids: Scrapbooking to Own Their Stories Like a True Liberal * Field Guides: Reading In Spite of Learning Differences with Anna Krafve Pierce * Comic Books and Magazines: Reading for the Adventurous Child with Anna Krafve Pierce * Classic Books: Inspiring Wisdom and Multi-Generational Readers with Anna Krafve Pierce * Curiosity: Teaching Your Child to Glory in Education with Anna Krafve Pierce * Walk-in Education. No Homeschool Burn Out Here! with Anna Krafve Pierce * DIY Curriculum: How to Inspire Self-learning in Kids with Anna Krafve Pierce * Architecture: How to Create Cool Drive Through Education for Your Family with Anna Krafve * Inspiring Flashlight Readers with Anna Krafve Pierce * Back to School: A Plan for Success with Anna Krafve Pierce * Raising Musical Children for Musically-Challenged Mommies with Anna Krafve Pierce

Conversations With Anna About Family Fun* Devotion and Bright Paper Packages Tied Up with Strings * Life, Liberty and Music, Celebrating American Faith with Anna Krafve * Hospitable Hearts: The Bounce Back of Welcome with Anna Krafve Pierce * Camping, Glamping, and the Glorious Outdoors with Anna Krafve Pierce * True Love and Faithfulness Valentine’s Day 2020 with Anna Krafve Pierce * Redefining Romance to Fit Your Family’s Lifestyle with Anna Krafve Pierce * Cheap and Easy Homemade Costumes with Anna Krafve Pierce * Tea Time Anytime: Raising Confident Girls with Anna Krafve Pierce * Birthday Myth Busting: Create a Birthday Blessing without Breaking the Bank! Anna Krafve Pierce * Creating a Natural Sanctuary: Backyard Adventures with Anna Krafve Pierce * Staycations on the Cheap with Anna Krafve * Christmas with Small Children? The Gift of Freedom from Holiday Stress with Anna Krafve * Making Thanksgiving a Family Favorite with Anna Krafve Pierce * The Thanksgiving Kit: Hiding the Squirrel and Finding the Nuts

Conversations With Anna About Family Values* True Grit: Teaching Kids to be Fearless in the Face of Failure with Anna Krafve Pierce * Teaching Kids to Respect Sacrifice: Veteran’s Day with Anna Krafve Pierce * Veterans Day: The Busy Mom’s Guide with Anna Krafve Pierce * Independence Day: How to Foster Independence in Kids and Country with Anna Krafve Pierce * Father’s Day Fabulous with Anna Krafve Pierce * Mother’s Day Marvelous with Anna Krafve Pierce * Creativity and Redemption: The Art of Messing Up with Anna Krafve

Wow! That’s a Whole Lotta Wisdom!So far, that’s 173 episodes jammed-packed with GREAT ideas! And so many downloads we quit counting after 7 million last year! To us, while the numbers are impressive, each download means only one thing: somewhere out there a listening or reading friend found the help and encouragement they needed.

Thank you, thank YOU for sharing episodes with your friends. With your help, folks are finding the stories and wisdom to make their lives better!

Together, we can change our culture, one conversation, one family at a time!

🙂 CathyWe LOVE to Hear From YOU!Which episode is your favorite and why? Who do you wish we would interview? What topics do we need to talk about in church and in our communities?

May we pray together?Dear good Father, thank You for giving us wisdom that heals and comforts. Thank You for Your direction. Catapulting other people’s wisdom out in the universe where it can help more people is truly joyful and fun! We’re so grateful to be in this together with so many beautiful reading and listening friends. Plus, it’s really fun hearing from experts who have conquered their fears and faced trials with courage and, well mostly, dignity. Thank You for the strength You give us when life seems too hard to bear. Thank You for friends. Bless us now because that is Your heart’s desire. In Jesus’s name. Amen.

Cathy Krafve, host of Fireside Talk Radio and author of The Well: The Art of Drawing Out Authentic Conversations and Marriage Conversation: From Coexisting to Cherished. Your stories, ideas, and questions welcomed here!

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Just for YOU, we’ve been busy interviewing some of leading experts on parenting. Because we all want to raise resilient, healthy adults. Basically, the kind of confident, compassionate adult children we want to hang out with later.

On a Personal NoteIf you’ve missed me, I’ve been busy writing the initial manuscript for our parenting book!

Since it’s a sequel to Marriage Conversations, I bet we call it, Parenting Conversations. I’m really excited about getting off to my editor. I can’t wait to share it with you!

It’s full of stories about what I’m learning from my grown kids as they parent. ❤️

If you want to join my Book Launch Team, I promise to only send you goodies, like insider info and special treats, and not to fill up your inbox with junk. (I hate it when people clutter up my inbox with junk!)

Parenting: Creating A Healthy Childhood Obviously, creating a healthy childhood for kids doesn’t mean we protect them from every ache and pain. So, yes, this list includes lots of fun stuff to do as a family. Ways to inspire wonder and creativity in your children’s hearts.

But our list also includes how to pick up the pieces when the unexpected strikes. You’re gonna love what these down-to-earth experts have to say.

Parenting PodcastsSurprisingly, I find some of the serious titles below encouraging. For instance, popular topics like suicide and divorce tell me proactive parents are seeking good information rather than drowning in fear.

Plus, we’re offering tested information from trusted, humble experts. Win-win!

• 10 Unexpected Parenting. Her Story: When an Infant’s Physical Disability is Diagnosed During Pregnancy with Katie Butts, 40,418

• 9 Fatherhood. His Story: How Talk of Suicide Changed His Perspective on Ministry with Chris Legg, 49,190

• 8 Fatherhood. His Wisdom, Easy Ways to Transform Your Parenting with Chris Legg, 49,640

• 7 Raising Creative Kids. Her Wisdom: Fostering a Community Filled with Scientific Discovery, with Whitney Patterson, 49,802

• 6 Relationship SuperHeroes. His Story: Making Good Decisions for Your Family with Benjamin A. Simpson, 55,547

• 5 Suddenly Single Mom with Jeanette Hanscome, Her Wisdom, 62,378

• 4 The Dark Place of Suicide or Mommy Care? Oxygen and Comfort for Mom with Kristin Faith Evans, Her Story, 62,722

• 3 Raising Liberty Loving Kids with Lathan Watts, His Story, 71,569

• 2 Hands Full: Humor and Inspiration for Devoted Mommies with Brooke Frick, Her Story, 139,572

Drum Roll for Number One!* #1 Motherhood: Encouraging Yourself in a Hands Full Life with Brooke Frick, Her Wisdom, with 140,606 downloads! Congratulations to my sweet friend, Brooke. She is amazing.

I really can’t get enough of her sweet family. Last time we were together, their family traveled America in an RV! We recorded this video just for you. Now they’re living and ministering in Africa.

Apparently, I’m not Brooke’s only fan, since her other podcast came in at #2!

More Parenting Ideas For Confident Adults* Raising Creative Kids. Her Story: Giving Them a Childhood Filled with Wonder, with Whitney Patterson * Grace-filled Families: The Grace Impact on Family with Nancy Kay Grace, Her Wisdom * Fatherhood: Qualified to Mentor with Tony Johnson * Unexpected Parenting. Her Wisdom: How to Encourage Families with Unexpected Differences with Katie Butts * Fatherhood: Myth-busting about Mentoring with Tony Johnson * Raising History-Loving Kids with Danny Sessums, Ph.D. * “Porn-Proofing” Your Kids: Fighting for Love with Rosie MaKinney * Next Step: Creating the Right Conversations with Your Daughter with DeeDee Lake * Talking to Teenage Daughters: Tips for Tuning In with DeeDee Lake * Inspiring Through Music: Winning the Heart of Your Child with Miles Pike, His Wisdom * Family Fatigue: Building Back Better Families with Deb DeArmond * Civic-Minded Kids: PATH for the Next Generation with Andrea Wilson, Her Story

Overcoming Trauma With Victory* Unbeaten by Pain: A Beautiful Life in the Midst of Miscarriage with Lindsey Bell * Devastating Moments, Crisis, and Suffering: When God Lights Up the Sky with Becky Carpenter * Dark Clouds Threaten: Keeping the Sunshine of Joy with Kristin Faith Evans * Battle Ready Marriage: 8 Tips for Preparing Your Family for Any Challenge with Tamara Clymer * Battle Ready Faith: For Battles You Don’t Expect to Fight with Tamara Clymer * The Drug Pandemic. Not in Vain: Real Addiction. Real Pain with Bobbie Zeimer * Drug Addiction and Your Child: You are NOT Alone with Bobbie Ziemer, Her Wisdom * God’s Best During Your Worst with Robin Luftig * Carried by Grace: When Sexual Abuse Happens in Your Home with Deb Butterfield * Mothers of Victims of Sexual Abuse: Carried by Grace with Deb L. Butterfield * Sexual Abuse: Claiming Victory Over Darkness with Sarah Van Hook * Rebuilding Relationships After Sexual Abuse with Sarah Van Hook * Mental Illness and Sparking Wholeness: Erin Kerry’s Story * Domestic Violence: Anchoring Sisters in Christ with Paula Silva

Parenting Aches and Pain: Cathy’s “Diagnosis and Treatments”My dad was a doctor, but I’ve never even played one on TV! Still, from Dad, I learned the value of a good diagnosis. How can you treat a problem if you don’t know what the problem is?

If you’re looking down this list looking for solutions, you’ve come to the right place. You won’t find these in any medical books. I’m no expert. I’m just a sympathetic fellow parent.

As always, I strongly support seeking out professional help. But how doe we figure out where to begin? Hopefully something here will give you a starting point.

I simply share some of the ideas we found helpful in our parenting journey. Plus, I share questions real parents sent in. So, we’re not alone. Nice!

• Family Group Dynamics: What’s Wrong? by Cathy Krafve
• Avoid Teen Rebellion: Family Fellowship I.Q. Quiz By Cathy Krafve
• Best Parenting Question This Week: How to Parent Strong Willed Children
• Best Parenting Question This Week: Wishy-Washy Parenting
• Teens Hang Out? Preteen Party Crashers by Cathy Krafve
• When Children Refuse to Go Along: Ask Good Questions
• My Parent in My House: How To Transition as the Sandwich Generation by Cathy Krafve
• Gratitude, the Search for Wisdom, and Personal Conversation with Ellen Krafve Trant

Conversations with Anna Top 10: Parenting Dave and I learn so much from our kids and their friends parent. Yeah, that’s a little humbling. But so sweet.

I guess it just proves our kids are not doomed to repeat our mistakes. What a relief!

Anna Krafve Pierce is one of our favorite young parents.

People LOVE Anna’s podcasts. So, I gave her a special button all her own. Just for YOU, here are her Top Ten. (But find tons more by clicking her button!)

• 1 Comic Books and Magazines: Reading for the Adventurous Child with Anna Krafve Pierce, 348,309

• 2 Classic Books: Inspiring Wisdom and Multi-Generational Readers with Anna Krafve Pierce, 276,989

• 3 DIY Curriculum: How to Inspire Self-learning in Kids with Anna Krafve Pierce, 232,002

• 4 Recipes to Teach Hospitality and Reading: Welcome to My Kitchen, 198,999

• 5 Life, Liberty and Music: Celebrating American Faith with Anna Krafve, 176,743

• 6 True Grit: Teaching Kids to be Fearless in the Face of Failure with Anna Krafve Pierce, 168,440

• 7 Bedtime Stories and Pajama Parties: Inspiring Your Kids to Love Reading, 145,424

• 8 Architecture: How to Create Cool Drive Through Education for Your Family with Anna Krafve, 136,892

• 9 “Clean Up Your Room!” Curating Your Child’s Collections with Anna Krafve Pierce, 134,585

• 10 Memoirs for Kids: Scrapbooking to Own Their Stories Like a True Liberal,

Thank YOU!None of these great conversations would get out in our culture without YOU! We believe good communication makes good humans. Please pray about who you could share these amazing experts with. Thank you for creating a better culture together one family, one conversation at a time!

🙂For The Well, Marriage Conversations or more FTR.CathyWe LOVE to hear from YOU!What is your greatest parenting challenge? How has your creativity paid off in a parenting moment? Besides you, who has had the most influence on your child for better or worse?

May we pray together?Dear good Father, You understand the heartaches that go with parenting. And the sacrificial love and unsurpassed joy. Thank You for loving Your children with unfailing love. Thank you for being strong when we are weak. We are grateful for Your tough love just as we praise You for Your tenderness. Thank You for always keeping our best interests at heart. Teach us to parent like You, dear One. Fill us with Your Holy Spirit so we walk with You in sweet companionship hour by hour. Thank You for never deserting us! Bless us now because that is Your heart’s desire. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

Join UsSign up for our FREE weekly (okay maybe twice a month) blogs and podcasts.

❤️ ❤️ ❤️

Cathy Krafve, host of Fireside Talk Radio and author of The Well: The Art of Drawing Out Authentic Conversations and Marriage Conversation: From Coexisting to Cherished. Your stories, ideas, and questions welcomed here!

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When we started Fireside Talk Radio, almost immediately we knew we wanted to talk about the stuff nobody talks about in church. Really Hot Topics. Too hot to touch.  Or maybe we talk about the counterculture stuff. The kind of stuff we say about entrepreneurship or the environment resonates for some reason. Yep, these are […]

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It all started 5 years ago with an invitation to talk about anxiety at a meeting. Phew, I’m not the only one! Little did I know mental health would become one of my go-to topics.  Sure, ladies talked about anxiety and depression together over lunch with close friends. But, nope, we didn’t seem to cover […]

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What are the top 3 things your wife wishes you knew? In case you want to ask her, here’s a place to start. #1 Listen to the people you love.  #2 Remember marriage and family are about redemption. #3 Cherish your people today because we might not get tomorrow. So, let’s take three stories and […]

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So, this week when I ran through my Pinterest notifications, I found this one! Yes, my book is on someone else’s Pinterest page. Wow! Silly I know, but can I just pause and be amazed. Pinterest Pinterest, or as I called it for years amid my kids’ laughter, PinInterest, is like a free magazine. I’m […]

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People often think of ambition as a bad thing. Maybe it is when ambition seeks to collect fancy toys, like hotrod cars and mink coats.  But what about all the men and women we know who are ambitious because they want to provide for their families. Healthy ambition can be downright selfless. Good Things “What […]

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The drug pandemic took one of her children. But Bobbie Ziemer decided, “Not in vain!”  Lord willing.  Today’s blog is dedicated to Madison Ziemer Cross in remembrance of her beautiful life and honoring the anniversary of her entrance to heaven on October 10, 2017. Please help us by sharing today’s blog. The Drug Pandemic Perhaps […]

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We live in an era of broken hearts, wounding histories, cohabitation, blended families, and all sorts of new configurations of marriage and family. “My marriage was so bad. I realize it was not worth the paper it was printed on,” reports Sandra Beck who has had plenty of time to heal. “It was a big, […]

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Our world sure needs more wholehearted marriages! Scott Kedersha and his family have experienced two different thriving churches now. Why are some churches thriving? Perhaps the secret is in the way they welcome brokenhearted people. Aren’t we all brokenhearted at one time or another? Of course, we all get hurt by Life’s crises! So how […]

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I needed to reboot a marriage. My own marriage. I was tripping David with the way I communicated. If only I could summon up more courage and humility. But I felt crushed, defeated, and very, very insecure.  And angry. Why did everybody else seem to have great marriages but me? Susan Cox, Re/Engage Director at […]

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Do you have what it takes to create a death-defying love story? If you were dying, could your love keep you alive? That’s exactly what we think happened in our family. Last week when it was freezing, I took a minute to create something special for you. It’s me reading a tribute to one of […]

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How do we stay calm in a crisis? Life throws lots of surprises at us. Take the way frigid temps and snow changed everything this past few days. Plus, we all make foolish decisions we live to regret. But, a faith that is tried by fire is a faith that can be trusted, according to […]

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I’m not waiting for Thanksgiving to thank God for champion warrior women, like Rosie MaKinney. She joined me to talk about “porn-proofing” your kids. (For Rosie’s story, click here.) Hollywood seems to claim October for evil and destruction in the name of entertainment. Our culture throws all kinds of yucky stuff at families, especially at […]

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Today, Deb Butterfield and her daughter are living examples of the beautiful way God restores lives and blesses us all. How in the world do you forgive when sexual abuse happens in your home? With tenderness, Debra L. Butterfield describes her experience as being carried by grace. This is the second in a two-part series. If you missed Deb’s story, please click here.

What will your life look like now? Will your daughter forgive you? Has God forgotten you? Will your brain ever un-fog? Who can you trust?

We’ve all experienced those kinds of questions, but it’s hard to imagine the kind of anguish that goes with sexual abuse of a daughter. Deb joined me to talk frankly about what it means to forgive someone when sexual abuse happens in your home to your daughter. And what forgiveness is NOT.

Forgiveness Of course, it’s one thing to forgive and dismiss small potato stuff. But when sexual abuse happens in your home, well, this is the hard one. Who doesn’t get bitter waiting for justice that may never happen?

Certainly, sobbing with sorrow can become a daily ritual. Yet, when you’re carried by grace, forgiveness can also be part of the picture.

“Forgiveness is letting go of your right to see the perpetrator get justice,” Deb says. “In our legal system, when someone commits a crime, they’re charged and they go to court. You know, they receive a punishment. Forgiveness is letting go of that and allowing God to handle it all.” (You can reach out to Deb here.)

Deb tenderly encourages us to know our families can heal. In fact, she and Cathy even laugh–yes, laugh–throughout this gentle conversation filled with comfort for the broken-hearted mom still reeling from the trauma. If you think life will never be the same, listen in now as Deb describes lives healed after sexual abuse. For this and many other podcasts, click here. Sign up for our free blog here. A Choice of Our Free Will “So often I hear about forgiveness as being a process, but forgiveness is a choice of your free will. It’s a decision you make,” Deb explains. “Now, it takes time for your emotions to catch up with that decision.”

She shares a personal example. “I mean I was constantly saying, ‘I’ve chosen to forgive my husband, I’ve chosen to forgive my husband.’”

We may find ourselves coming back to powerful emotions over and over again, according to Deb. Yet, she is clear about forgiveness.

“The first time I chose to forgive him, he was forgiven. So, it’s not like it’s a process where the forgiveness grows because it just doesn’t. It’s a free will choice.”

Honestly, even though we know Jesus died on the cross to extend forgiveness, ouch, it can be so hard to forgive. Still, Deb makes me want to forgive, to be carried by grace, too. One thing I like about Deb—she’s real, precise, and practical. Plus, her relationship with God is obvious, especially to those of us who know her well.

Beating the Inevitable Depression “We want justice. It’s just part of who God created us to be,” Deb explains. “He’s a righteous God, a God of justice. We’re created in His image and that means we want those same things.”

In such situations, it’s easy to succumb to the inevitable depression. But for Deb, being carried by grace includes a practical strategy to escape the depression trap. (For more on how to forgive relentlessly, click here.)

“My experiences have taught me that praising God chases away my depression and soothes my broken heart. The most important time to praise God is when you’re feeling your worst — so, no, you won’t feel like praising. Praising God through your tears is a sacrifice, an exercise of your willpower. (See Hebrews 13:15) Your emotions scream at you to sit down and cry, but you must do your best to ignore your emotions and praise despite your tears. Don’t hesitate to let the tears flow as you praise God.”~Debra L. Butterfield from her book, Carried by Grace: A guide for mothers of victims of sexual abuse, (CrossRiver Media) pg 61**

Deb’s Meaningful Rituals for Keeping It Together in Crisis

Meaningful rituals can provide a sense of normalcy in a crisis that affects the whole family, according to Deb. For other children who may be too young to understand why the family is unraveling, meaningful rituals can provide a sense of security.

• Breakfast with the kids
• Storytime at bedtime
• A morning quiet time
• Taking stock of your chore list—realizing that some stuff used to be handled but the perpetrator
• Scheduling fun activities with the kids (Click here for cheap, easy fun with kids.)
• Any others that comfort to your broken heart, especially if they focus your attention on God’s goodness (For more on God’s goodness, click here.)

How do meaningful rituals help with the forgiveness piece?

“My daughter was suffering number one, but I had two other children,” Deb says. “So, now they were also doing without a dad in the home and going through everything we were experiencing.” (For how to be your family’s champion, click here.)

She adds it’s “just very important to maintain some normalcy and realize that, yeah, life goes on. And we’re going to be okay.” Meaningful rituals can provide a way for forgiveness to take root.

Carried by Grace in Community Another way to foster forgiveness is to seek wise friends. A mom can easily become isolated in her effort to protect the privacy of her children—it’s part of the sacrifice a mother will assume. (For how to care for yourself when you feel overwhelmed, click here.)

It’s okay to test a friend for trustworthiness by sharing a small piece of info. See if your information travels via gossip or if the other person responds in a gentle, wise way.

When sexual abuse happens in your home, being carried by grace may be the last thing you think of. For instance, if you looked at Deb’s situation from the outside, you might see a double dose of injustice. As a stay-at-home mom, not only did all this bad stuff happen but suddenly she had to support her family financially as well. (For how to create family wealth, click here.)

Fortunately, God’s plans are constantly adjusting to make room for sin. Daily, He redeems unexpected tragedy and surprises us with blessings in the midst of trials with mercy new each morning. One example is the community Deb found in her new job.

“I was working at a Christian organization,” Deb reports. “As I got to know my co-workers, I began to trust them. As my trust grew, I shared bits and pieces of my story,” Deb says. “They didn’t judge or condemn. They just loved me.”

What Do We Say? When sexual abuse happens in your home, it’s confusing for friends. What can we say without making it worse? Instead of asking judgmental questions, her coworkers offered comfort in all the best ways.

“They didn’t react any differently. They just took me at face value,” she says. One aspect of their comfort surprised me when Deb shared it. “They came to me for help with, you know, the job I was doing for them.”

In other words, they communicated that things were okay. Life would move on. They would be there to be friends as the process unfolded. (For how to raise kids who persevere, click here.)

“I was just able to sense their love. That was so important for me because I couldn’t sense that love from God. He allowed His love to come through them.”

Hope in the Hurt Each time I read Deb’s words or hear her speak I’m challenged. Yet, she explains hard stuff with tenderness because she’s lived through the worst thing a mother can imagine.

If you’ve discovered sexual abuse in your home, you don’t have to go through this alone. You need rock-solid information, dear one, and real comfort. I eagerly invited Deb on our show for you. We want you to feel carried by grace, too.

Trauma Takes Time to Heal “This is a huge trauma,”Deb explains. “Even after three years, I was still healing.” Of course, it’s different for each individual, she adds. “It’s easy to understand how a person can experience initial healing and still have odd stuff pop up later.” By later, she means decades later.

“It was twelve years even before I wrote the book. As I started writing the book, God led me through more healing. So, trauma is just that, it’s deep. It has layers and layers upon layers that have to be healed. God is gracious enough to heal us one layer at a time because I don’t think we could handle it any other way.”

Victorious Together In all the ways Deb trusted God, what is most important as she thinks back on this trauma?

“I rarely think back on it,” she responds instantly and we both laugh together.

“Really, just realize that it takes time to heal and know that you will heal,” Deb says, adding more comfort, “I am so grateful in the way God has used this in my daughter’s life because she is now a full-time practicing therapist for children.”

I love the victory in her daughter’s life, too. And the fact that they have such a sweet relationship. (Watch for our upcoming interview with Sarah here.) Deb believes trusting God to have some hard conversations brought about a world of healing. “I had to step out in faith.”

Oh, Deb, my warrior-hearted friend, how proud I am of you and your beautiful daughter! Thank you for making your story, your wisdom, and your beautiful book available to bless the rest of us.

I treasure Deb’s story and the courage it took for her to share it. Sharing our stories means God can take the broken pieces and make something sacred out of them, like broken shards become a stained glass window. The pain becomes a confined part of a larger story. Our lives become the glorious sacred story of God’s intervention, redemption, and healing.

Whatever you are going through today, God is on your side. He will reach you in your pain if you stay alert for comfort from trustworthy friends. You are not alone, dear one!

May we pray together? Dear good Father in heaven, sometimes You feel really far away. We wonder if You’ve forgotten about Your child. How could You let this happen? Don’t You love me or my daughter anymore, good Father? Where are our friends when we need them? Open our eyes to the way You reach into our pain and comfort us. Teach us to value the price paid for forgiveness by Your Son on the cross. Carry us in Your grace. Give us strength and clarity for today’s trials. Clear our minds to think wisely. Strengthen us as we comfort and lead our children, O Lord. We need Your powerful Spirit to saturate our hearts, dear Father because our hearts break. Mend us, we pray. Teach us to trust You and reach out to claim victory. In Jesus’s name, we pray.

We LOVE to hear from YOU! How has someone comforted you in the midst of pain? When you praise God in spite of your circumstances, what do you say? Which meaningful rituals help you and your family?

More of Deb’s Story Last week, Deb shared many personal details from her story. If you happened to miss that blog or if your heart is broken over the sexual abuse of a beloved child, please click here for Deb’s story! Please share this with your friends!

And don’t forget to sign up for our FREE blog, interviews, and podcasts here. All free and just once a week.

Other Important Topics God has blessed us with many experts since we started Fireside Talk Radio. Please look for wisdom from trustworthy people on these topics: Domestic Violence, Bullying in School, Suicide of a Child, Suicide of a Sibling, Breast Cancer, Sex After Breast Cancer, Life After Divorce, Single Parenting, Chronic Pain, Burn Out, Perfectionism, and many others.

Panicking about homeschooling this year? We created several weeks of Easy Homeschooling Lesson Plans last spring. No need to worry, you got this! Easy-peasy!

Easy Homeschooling Lesson Plans.

Cathy Krafve, Columnist, Speaker, Blogger, Podcaster, and Christian Writer, invites your stories, ideas, and questions at CathyKrafve.com. Truth with a Texas Twang.

The post Carried by Grace: When Sexual Abuse Happens in Your Home with Deb Butterfield appeared first on Cathy Krafve.