The AlphaLife Project: Recent Episodes
Bala Chandran
Welcome to The AlphaLife Project!
Everyone wants to live an AlphaLife, a life where they excel, live their full potential and be their best version.
Living an AlphaLife needs continuous and purposeful work. It won't happen all by itself. Moreover, if you don’t work on upgrading your own life, who else will?
In this podcast, we will discuss and introspect upon all things you, everything that should matter to you, with a 3-point agenda:
(i) Establishing Awareness (ii) Enabling Analysis and (iii) Empowering Action.
After all, you have only one life... ...may as well make it your AlphaLife!
Decisions - the word implies something very critical and very big. There is a lot of weight attached to this word - decisions. Somehow, people think that this is something big in life
But, this is something that is part of your moment-to-moment life. If decisions are all around you and you need to take them every single moment of your life, then it cant be really something too serious right?
The thing is, people think of decisions as life-altering events. Moreover, not everyone takes their own decisions. The other aspect is, people gravitate towards the easier decisions than the tough ones.
And then, sometimes your decisions go wrong. And you look at them in retrospect and keep wondering how you could have got it right. Somehow, people think that this is something big in life.
Dive deep into this topic and know more by listening to the entire podcast episode.
Success & failure are two sides of the same coin. But it takes a lifetime for people to even get anywhere near understanding this. Your mind is wired in such a manner that you want only success and you want to avoid failure.
All of this comes from pre-historic times because failure during those times usually ended in termination of one's life. Even today, when you think of what you want to do, you may think of getting success in the initial stages but eventually you start thinking only about all the ways you could possibly fail. This makes you either very fearful or makes you feel unprepared at all times, leading you to prepare more and more for outcomes that haven't yet occurred. However, like all actions, this one also has consequences
Every moment spent in thinking about failure and what you don’t want is a moment spent not thinking about success and what you really want. These thoughts plague you - there is a mini-hellstorm taking place in that brain of yours! You end up wasting precious time in all the things that are not needed, and you miss out on doing the things that are actually needed. When you focus only on what all could go wrong - your journey just comes to a standstill, it never takes off.
Dive deep into this topic and know more by listening to the entire podcast episode.
Whether you accept or not, you lack gratitude in life. Because, if you were not lacking gratitude, you wouldn’t be complaining as much. If you weren't lacking gratitude, you would be much happier, much more content.
The thing with gratitude is, It is binary in nature - either you have it or you don’t. If you say that you have 50% of it, it doesn’t work. And hence, most people think they have gratitude yet they keep cribbing about what's not happening for them in life.
Gratitude is not something that is set aside for the day when you achieve all your goals. That would never happen
All discontent comes from a lack of gratitude for what you have. And, when you don’t opt for gratitude, you are actually opting for the lack of it. This means - instead of acknowledging what you have, you are constantly acknowledging what you don’t have. Where do you think this is going to lead you - to get more things or to feel a further lack of stuff in life?
You will need to practice it actively. It won't happen by itself.
Dive deep into this topic and know more by listening to the entire podcast episode.
Whether you accept it or not, you are obsessed with balance. You do get to know when your life is going out of bounds and that troubles you a lot. But when you try to bring balance, you end up upsetting some other balance. This cycle seems to keep repeating…
Unlike what people think, balance is not about an equal distribution into each and every option. That is the one misconception that is hurting people more than it is helping them. Also, people usually end up wishing for no imbalance but that’s never going to happen; as long as there is motion or movement in your life, there will be imbalances;
The idea is not to avoid but to continuously sort it out. Looking at balance through a microscope doesn’t help, it needs to be a macro view.
There are only two things that one needs to do about balance but most people refrain from doing these things.
Dive deep into this topic and know more by listening to the entire podcast episode.
People have been facing an overwhelming feeling of boredom and staleness when it comes to their everyday work and life. Life just seems to drag on and on, and somehow contentment seems to be the ever-eluding factor. Probably you are indulging in Empty Rituals
EMPTY RITUAL
These are all habits that have got so deeply entrenched in your mind that you just do them without thinking. You are on auto-mode when you indulge in these rituals. You may even have no idea about why or how these things are going on in your life.
DELIBERATE PRACTICE
Deliberate practice, on the other hand, is something that is indulged in to get a specific desired result.
Your empty rituals don’t lead you anywhere. These two have lots to do with how your brain is wired.
Listen to the entire episode to know more on this.
There is no one in this world who has not thought of quitting something or the other multiple times. Quitting or the feeling of quitting is all around you. So is the entire gamut of emotions, feelings and beliefs that are associated with quitting.
Quitting is one side of the coin, the other side being starting / initiating. You cannot have only one side of it….you will need to indulge in the other one as well
Quitting is so hard because of the deep association that it has with your persona, your identity· You are not able to quit something because that particular thing gets attached to you as an integral part of your identity.
Also, the stigma that has been created in your mind about quitting is something that stops you from quitting and keeps you stuck.
Not quitting, not letting go when it's time is also one of the biggest reasons for issues with mental wellness and all sorts of internal struggles which basically tear you from inside.
The saying - winners don’t quit and quitters don’t win - can't be used as a thumb rule to everything.
It's high time we replace that with saying with a new one - winners also quit and quitters also win!
Do listen to the entire podcast on this topic.
The current day and time belong to speed for sure. Everyone wants everything really fast. But, today, there are more number of people who are going fast but have no idea where they are heading!
Speed & Velocity are mistaken to be the same thing. But they are not.
They are different only in one aspect - speed has no direction component to it while velocity has a specific direction component to it.
Speed, just for the heck of it, is meaningless. That’s why more people feel that they are living a fast but meaningless life. Because they have no clear idea of where they are going. In your quest to be faster and reach somewhere sooner, you have probably lost sense of your direction.
You see, direction trumps speed at any point. What's the point of going at breakneck speed but not sure where you are going?
There is only one thing that can be done with this.
Hear the podcast episode to know more about what you can do about the same
Majoring in the Minor - You do this without realizing and then worry about why things are not going as per how you want them to.
Majors are the main things in your life, the macro stuff. This is the stuff that really matters, the big stuff. This is what defines the main and almost all the aspects of your life. Minors are the smaller things in your life. This is the stuff that actually doesn’t matter much, the micro stuff. It is there to fill some gaps left by the majors
The biggest issue is that you pay less attention to the main stuff and you pay too much attention to the smaller stuff. This is called majoring in the minor.
Majoring in the minor is one of the key reasons why people realize too late that they didn’t prioritize the right stuff, wasted precious time on the unimportant stuff and missed out on a whole lot of opportunities.
This entire business of right or wrong is so deeply rooted in your consciousness that you just indulge in it without having to even think about it. These are all judgments and you can't help them. Right/wrong, good/bad - these are the biggest judgments of them all.
See all the clash of ideologies and thinking that happens around you. It could be in religion, in politics, in business or anywhere else.
These are just inventions of the mind. There is no universal right/wrong, good/bad unless everyone decides to agree to the same.
Transcend this and bring in fulfillment into your life.
You would have observed how you are a slave to your judgments. These judgments are now automated - you can't really help them, can you? Since you can't really stop your judgments from coming as they please, better way out is to know how to deal with them.
Judgment is just an artificial mind condition in which you see someone or something, maybe even yourself as being better or worse than a reference point. This is not the truth but this appears to be the truth to you at all times. It clouds your mind so much that you tend to act out of your judgments only, never from reality.
Acting from judgments is living in and acting out of unreality. Reality is reality, no matter how much u judge it. It's not going to change just because you are judging it. Judgment makes you take the 'right' side and hence defines the other side as 'wrong'.
It is critical to deal with this on your own because it won't deal with it by itself.
The game that you need to play to deal with your judgments is called FACT or OPINION. Fact is almost always what is there right in front of you while opinion is what you create out of the facts. This is one of the most powerful tools that can help you deal with your judgments.
What happens behind the scenes when you play this game: When you try to confront if it is fact or opinion in an authentic manner, you will force yourself to see the whole picture.
Fact vs. Opinion may be a game that kids are made to play to understand things deeper. But it’s a great tool for everyone to practice while dealing with their judgments.
It is extremely important to remain 'okay' at all times, irrespective of whether the situation is in your favour or not.
When you are 'not okay', everything around you irrespective of how favourable it is, will seem to be 'not okay'. And, if you are always 'okay', everything around you, even if unfavourable, would seem 'okay'. This is the key that defines how you choose your experiences.
This choice that one can make to experience the events in their life is one of the biggest contributors to your mental wellness.
This 'not okay' is a vicious cycle : not being okay - doubting if you have the required resources - thinking whether you are making correct decisions - doubting your own intentions - leading back to further being 'not okay'. It always spirals down.
Understand the basic principles behind how to always stay okay - okayness, resourcefulness, best choice, positive intention and see all your experiences transforming to fulfilling ones.
People usually think that Good < Better < Best < Perfect.
Correct?
Completely wrong in today's scenario.
The chase for perfection is eating up people from inside. It seems that everything around you is perfect - then why would you not want the same in your life?
Some people are chasing it for themselves while some are chasing it for others. After all, who wouldn’t want to have perfection in their lives – perfect personalities, perfect bodies, perfect relationships, perfect jobs, perfect children – the list just goes on and on. While you keep chasing perfection, it keeps eluding you.
The truth is, this chase for perfection is deeply troubling you from inside. It leads to a lot of negative emotions and shakes up your mental wellness.
Let go of your quest for perfection. Opt for 'Good Enough'!
Dive deep into this topic; develop awareness of what this quest for perfection is all about; understand why you try to seek perfection at the cost of the good; learn more about the causes that lead to this quest; analyze how this quest for perfection is affecting you and your mental wellness; figure out ways to reframe and tackle this; take immediate action to make your life more fulfilling and flourishing.
Measuring Up is something you do all the time to determine your self-worth, to see if you are good enough or not. The issue is, this never ends.
It's a never-ending journey, and is done to either show yourself or to others that you are good enough. Once a milestone is achieved, another is set, and it goes on and on.
You use certain parameters or metrics to measure up; and these metrics assume an all-consuming importance in your life. Everyone has their own unique set of metrics which they use to measure up, and no two sets of metrics are ever the same. Out of all your metrics, you always have one prime metric to which you give maximum importance.
This measuring-up business leads you to a lot of negative emotions, and makes you expend a lot of efforts. But, these efforts never seem to be enough - there is always more to be done or achieved.
It's high time there is an overall reframing of your metrics! It is high time you stopped torturing yourself.
Dive deep into this topic; develop awareness of what measuring up is all about; understand the causes of why you always try to measure up; learn more about metrics and identify your own set of metrics, including your prime metric in life; analyze how this measuring up is affecting you and your life; realize why it is critical for you to deal with it; gather ways to tackle and reframe this measuring up; take immediate action towards the same; live a better and meaningful life.
Everyone indulges in Comparisons; and everyone ends up feeling discontent!
All of this has become a natural part of life, but does it really need to be?
Comparing comes very naturally to you - it's because it has been deeply encoded into your DNA as a feedback loop. Unfortunately, the main reason why it got coded-in no longer applies to most people. But the habit of comparing continues, thus bringing in more discontentment.
It is absolutely important to understand where all this comes from, what is it's founding reason, what form has it taken today and why it leads to so much discontentment. It is very important to deal with it immediately so that you can bring in contentment into your life and everything that you do.
Dive deeper into this topic; develop awareness of how comparisons comparisons came into being; analyze how comparisons affect you and your life; realize why it is critical for you to deal with it, understand ways to tackle this and take action towards the same; experience absolute contentment.
A lot has been said about Mental Wellness; but not enough is being done towards it.
In fact, 'not enough' is one of the starting points to this entire issue. We are, after all, living in a culture of 'more is better'.
Everyone goes about their life with a sense of inadequacy & 'not enough' ("I am not enough, I don’t have enough"). This has a huge negative impact on your life.
It is critical to reframe this entire thought behind 'not enough'. It is absolutely important to start with the attitude of "I am enough" and "I have enough".
Become more aware of what 'not enough' does to you; analyze how this is affecting your life; realize why 'enough' is one of the most critical things in your life; take immediate action on being enough; experience mental wellness.
People face stress in different aspects of their life. Stress has become such a common thing that it has assumed pandemic proportions. 'Being stressful' has become a regular state for most people today. Something needs to be done about it right away!
How you deal with your stress matters the most. Stress has developed a lot of negative connotations. Stress is actually not at all negative; in fact, if dealt with properly, it can be a great positive. It has been our age-old friend, and it is a necessary ingredient to growth and evolution.
It's very important to understand stress in detail - how it originates, who really causes it etc. It's critical to reframe everything you know about stress so that you can deal with it effectively and harness it for your maximum benefit.
Reframe your stress as a growth catalyst; stop calling it an inhibitor!
Bring in a greater awareness of what stress really is; understand how stress originates in life; analyze how it is affecting you and your life; take action to deal with it; harness your stress for your benefit; experience growth in your life!
We are living in extremely stressful and frustrating times! It is very important to keep re-orienting yourself to the state of being that you desire.
Sometimes, this happens externally - because of something changing around you. But, most of the times, this happens internally - because of what you change in yourself.
Pretend-Play is something that kids do daily, but it has huge lessons and takeaways for adults in particular.
Pretend-play is a much-needed bridge to change your current (unfavorable) state into the one that you desire, a favorable state. It is when you think, act, behave and live as if you have already achieved the desirable state of being.
It is something that is much-needed in your playbook right now!
Develop a greater understanding of what pretend-play is all about; analyze yourself and become more aware of how this could positively impact your life; take steps to incorporate this pretend-play into the relevant parts of your life; experience play, flow and growth in all these aspects of your life.
Your beliefs in life may actually be restricting and limiting you!
Beliefs govern your entire life, everything you do. You tend to live your life based on the beliefs that you carry. You view all your experiences in such a manner so as to confirm your beliefs; all you’re actions get aligned in such a manner to prove your beliefs to be true!
Every evolution and advancement that has happened in the last million-or-so years has been only because someone broke the then-existing belief systems and thought afresh, in an unlimited and expanding manner.
This is a very powerful thought to become aware of, and to practice on a regular basis. It is one of the best ways to live an upgraded life.
Expand your understanding of what beliefs are; become aware of how these beliefs govern each and every aspect of your life; think deeply and analyze how this impacts you and your life; take immediate steps to break your beliefs; experience growth and advancement in all aspects of your life.
You need to ever make only one of two choices in life: either belong to and live in your 'here' & 'now' or just don’t.
Most people put all their efforts in trying to escape their 'here' and their 'now' - they are always running away from these, trying to live in some other time (the past or the present) or trying to live in some other place (a space which is far away from their own self).
This is one of the most important ideas to understand and act from in life. Once you do, your life gets upgraded to a level you never imagined, you start feeling much more powerful, and you have a true shot at exploring and living your full potential in life. This is because everything real and meaningful happening in your life is happening only in your 'here' - your space - and your 'now' - the current moment. Everything else is pure unreality.
Dive deep into what it means to live in the 'here' and 'now' and become more aware; understand why this matters to you in your life; gather ideas to analyze where you stand in all of this; take action steps to rectify the same; fill your life with joy and contentment.
After all, the power of making the choice…
…to live a joyful and content life…
…to invite fulfilment into your life…
…to live an AlphaLife…
…is yours and yours alone!
Everyone thinks that the stuff happening in their life is the only real thing in the world; but when everyone thinks like that, it creates the space for multiple versions of the same reality!
Think of the times you wished for things to be different, for things to change. All of those are times when you felt stressful about whatever was happening in your life. All of those are times when you were living in absolute unreality.
When you see people around you, you can mostly see that those people are being unreal; it is acknowledging this within yourself (that you may also be living in unreality) that is the most difficult.
But, the sooner you understand this, acknowledge this and accept this - that you tend to live in unreality and your reality needs to be acted upon - the sooner your life becomes better.
Unreality is all mind stuff and imagination while reality is what is actually happening - the truth.
There are big upsides to acknowledging and acting from your reality - no pending baggage, experiencing everything afresh, feeling completion in everything and with everyone, movement and growth in life, feeling authenticity, joy & contentment…..the list is endless.
Become aware of what is reality and what is unreality; understand why it is important for you to understand this; analyze which one do you give more importance to in your life; act on it immediately; upgrade your life and fill it with joy.
And, when you really acknowledge, accept and deal with your reality…
…your life feels joyful, fresh, authentic and complete…
…you find life to be more fulfilling and…
…you start living your AlphaLife!
'Growing Up' seems to be a default thing that people do; but, do they really??
Just count the number of times you go "oh, please grow up!"- whether to someone else or to your own self. Countless times, right?
Look around and you will find that a lot of people need to grow up. It is difficult - this 'growing up' business; otherwise everyone would have done it by now. And, it has nothing to do with the physical growing up. This is different - this is the emotional part of growing up, the real growing up that matters in life!
Growing up is a mandatory condition for one to have a fulfilled life - because life doesn’t present itself as a gift to people who refuse to just grow up. Not growing up keeps you stuck in life, denying you the growth and expansion that you desire.
This is a deep topic and is presented in 2 parts - the earlier part spoke about the 'Why' of Growing Up while this one is about the "How' of Growing Up.
Become aware of this growing up business; understand why is it required for you; figure out where and why you are stuck in this; know how to really grow up; and grow to your full potential.
And, when you really grow up to your full potential…
…your life gets transformed into a fulfilling and flourishing one and…
…you finally start living your AlphaLife!
'Growing Up' seems to be a default thing that people do; but, do they really??
Just count the number of times you go "oh, please grow up!"- whether to someone else or to your own self. Countless times, right?
Look around and you will find that a lot of people need to grow up. It is difficult - this 'growing up' business; otherwise everyone would have done it by now. And, it has nothing to do with the physical growing up. This is different - this is the emotional part of growing up, the real growing up that matters in life!
Growing up is a mandatory condition for one to have a fulfilled life - because life doesn’t present itself as a gift to people who refuse to just grow up. Not growing up keeps you stuck in life, denying you the growth and expansion that you desire.
This is a deep topic and is presented in 2 parts - this part talks about the 'Why' of Growing Up while the next one is about the "How' of Growing Up.
Become aware of this growing up business; understand why is it required for you; figure out where and why you are stuck in this; know how to really grow up; and grow to your full potential.
And, when you really grow up to your full potential…
…your life gets transformed into a fulfilling and flourishing one and…
…you finally start living your AlphaLife!
Life, if seen in its totality and entirety, seems very complex. But, it's all actually a game.
It is a game that all of us are playing. Some seem to be playing really well while some don’t seem to be as good at it.
We are all actually playing a big, long game, spread over decades. Since we are playing this game, we may as well recognize that fact and play with full awareness and enjoyment. Playing without awareness gets us stuck and brings in dullness while playing with full awareness brings in a lot of joy, contentment and learning.
Moreover, playing with full awareness is one of the main conditions that allow us to win big at life.
The Game Called Life has different stages / levels, and each level has different characteristics, different challenges, different powers and different rewards.
Become aware of this game; understand its various stages / levels; figure out which level you are playing at or getting stuck at; upgrade yourself to the highest level; and actualize your full potential in this game called Life.
And, when you play big, to your full potential and at the highest level…
…you start living your AlphaLife!
You want your life to be great; but is your Life Story allowing it to be?
You are defined by the stories that you tell others and, most importantly, to your own self. These stories become your life stories, and limit you from living your full potential at any time. You think that these narratives are guiding you but, in reality, your narratives only inhibit you from breaking barriers and growing out of them.
This is definitely not unconditional living; this is programmed living.
And, the more you tell ourselves something through this narrative, the more you want it to be true, and hence, the bigger the attempt to maintain conformity to the same.
Unless you change the narrative of your own life, you will not be able to control the plot of the movie that is your life.
Become more aware of why your life story matters to you; analyze how your life story impacts the way you live your life; and act on what all you need to do to change this about your life, and to live your AlphaLife!
It's absolutely about time!
It's about time that you told yourself (and everyone else around you) that you need to start working on improving your life and making this your AlphaLife.
It's about time that you stopped putting the spotlight on others and turn it on your own self.
It's about time that you realized the truth - only you can change your life; no one else is going to do that for you.
It's about time that you put yourself as your own top priority instead of having others as your priority.
It's about time that you stopped postponing living your life to the fullest.
It's about time that you started living your life, the way you want.
It's about time that you live your AlphaLife!
Become more aware of why a lack of allocating your own time for your own self is limiting you, analyze how this is happening in your own life and act immediately to transform your life!
Welcome to The AlphaLife Project!
AlphaLife is about living your life like an Alpha, leading in all aspects and ensuring that your life is content, upgrading and transforming your life to make it fulfilling and flourishing.
This podcast has a simple agenda of establishing Awareness, enabling Analysis and empowering Action, with the purpose of helping you to confront and introspect about each of the situations you may facie pertaining to the most important parts of life and assisting you in having a deeper, meaningful and honest conversation with your own self.
Keep watching this space for a lot of interesting discussions and introspections.
Once again, welcome to The AlphaLife Project!