Mentoring the Daily: Recent Episodes
Melanie Hardacker
Encouragement as we go through the daily of life. Designed to initiate discussion within small mentoring groups.
Madeline and I chat about the difference in how Gen x, millennials and Gen z all perceive the world and how we can understand and embrace our differences.
This month Amy and I chat about Grief and its biblical companion Lament. We talk about the importance of allowing yourself to feel the feelings even as we acknowledge God is good in all things. And we talk about creating rituals or having something tangible to hold onto inside that grief. We both feel like we could have been more creative about the ritual conversation but hopefully it sparked some ideas of your own.
Rachel started a new app called "Mom Badge". The purpose is to encourage moms along the journey seeing and affirming all the big and small moments in parenting. While this episode is very mom heavy, encouragement is something important for all of us at every season and stage of life. I don't just need to be seen on the day I survive getting pooped on in public, or survived swim lessons, I also need to survive the day I pumped my gas in a snowstorm, hung a picture on the wall straight, found a pair of cheaters I feel cute in, etc.
Searching the internet I found this quote which I did not write down the source but it wasn't me...
"Encouragement leads to confidence, which leads to action, which leads to accomplishment, which branches off to more encouragement."
How can we as women of various ages and stages and seasons encourage one another in both the big and the mundane of life?
In Joshua 1 the Lord commanded him to be strong and courageous, to not be discouraged, and reminded him that he would be with him wherever he went.
That is the sort of courage Becky and I talk about today.
Some questions to consider:
What areas of your life do you think "who am I?" instead of "Who is God?" when making decisions.
When is the last time you were couragous about something?
What community do you have for discerning? Who iare your courage mentors?
I am getting over a cold so appologies for a few coughs. Thought about asking my daughter to help me edit out the one at the end but decided to just keep it real.
If I was a professional podcaster I might have edited this a bit as we start to conclude and then keep talking I think 3 times here. However, this, instead, is the authenticity of conversation.
We had fun talking about creativity, Pam and I always have fun. She shares a broader understanding of how all of us, regardless of artistic talent, use creativity in our day to day life. We were all created in God's image and the first thing he did was...Create! So it is part of all of us as well.
Some questions for discussion:
How are you creative in your life?
How/where do you see creativity in your life?
What are some creativity killers in your life?
This episode I am talking with Andene O'Neil. We are exploring the 2 extremes of studying the word, simply for theological/academic purposes or only for relational purposes. How to we find our way to the middle, what are the pros and cons of each side. We had fun talking about it and hope you do as well. Here are a couple questions to get the conversation started in your groups:
Which side of the spectrum of study do you tend to fall?
What resources do you like for digging deeper into a passage?
What triggers do you use to refocus on the Lord throughout the day?
I brought Riss on for a fun chat about what we are enjoying in this season of our life. Different perspectives and thoughts between a teenager and a future empty nester.
The rules were simply 5 things that we are enjoying right now. Not too deep, don't over think but what is fun in this season of your life?
Hospitality doesn't equal perfection. In fact maybe it is better if it isn't perfect. Liz and I explore the topic of hospitality. Some great questions we talk about to think about with your group:
How do you define/think about hospitality?
How do you prepare yourself for hospitality?
What are some fun tips you have as we head into the holiday season?
Steph and I talk about life transitions as she moves her first child to college and asks herself what life looks like minus one child and realizing the other 2 will be following close behind.
We talked about the 3 stages of transitioning: the long good bye, the messy middle and the new beginning. Which stage are you in right now?
Elizabeth and I talk about making both big and small decisions in our life and how God can be present in both.
Questions to talk about in groups:
Share a big or small decision you made recently. What was your process, What did you learn?
Talk about how the small decisions we make help us prepare for the bigger decisions.
Have you every tried on a decision? Did it help give you clarity?
This was a great conversation with Cheryl. We started off talking about the quote "remember who you are and whose you are" and went from there.
Some great questions to think about at the end thinking about who we let define us, how we define ourselves.
In this episode I talk with Jen Asp from our daughter church, Resurrection Anglican, about imagination. She is writing her masters thesis on imagination and emotions. I have enjoyed chatting with her about it the last few months and thought it would be a fun topic to discuss in our groups.
Questions for discussion:
What is your response to the idea of imagination in faith? Good or bad?
What experience, if any, do you have with the teaching of imagination?
Can you think of ways you can apply or do apply imagination to your daily life?
Learning to ask good questions to get to know others and ourselves better. Andrea is the master question asker and I always find myself thinking about her questions days after talking to her. We talk about the importance of asking good questions and she shares some of her favorites.
Today I talk to Kim about her long wait until marriage and all she learned during those years.
In your groups we suggested talking about what you might be waiting for right now. Whatever it is, whether you have been waiting a few weeks or many years, can you see the ways God is working and present in the process? What tips might we offer for how to keep our eyes open to see those things? And how do we stay hopeful as time passes.
My Niece is getting married in a little over a week and I share the 3 tips to a long marriage I shared with her at her shower a few weeks ago. 3 things isn't at all an exhaustive list of marriage tips so I am sure you all have a few tips that have kept your marriages strong as well. Go ahead and talk about those in your groups and let's encourage each others marriage.
My tips are:
Grow up together
Embrace the stage of life you are in
Be open to the unexpected adventure or path God leads you down.
Helen and I have a conversation about comparing ourselves to other women and learning to embrace our own strengths and let go of the need to be perfect in all things.
In your groups be thinking about what your strengths are as a mom, wife, woman and how you can lean into those strengths. And how can you maybe delegate some tasks you aren't as great at?
This week I chat with one of our mentors, Lisa Geis, about one of her favorite characters in the bible, Hannah. And we look at the kind of faith God asks us to have as we raise our children and navigate all the parts of our life.
The first interview. Had lots of fun talking with Andrea as we figured out how to do this together. We recorded a fabulous conversation where we totally nailed the topic. Only we didn't record it because my screen when to sleep mode and I didn't realize it stopped recording when it did that. So then we re-recorded the meat of the interview and we hit all the high points and I think we still nailed it but there is always the sadness of the perfection lost. So now you know what I learned this past week and why I think the music will be a little weird. Stick with me here, I am bound to work it all out eventually.
Andrea and I started with a little ice breaker where we shared our 3 favorites off a list and thought it would be fun for you to do so as well. The list goes a little fast so here it is in writing as well... Books, wine, cats, music, art, beer, tea, dogs, movies, coffee, social media, chocolate.
I think we asked more questions along the way in the unrecorded version than in this second one so I will just broadly suggest you discuss what things feel like long games in your life right now and are there things that maybe need to shift into long game? Also, do you give yourself kindness (from Romans 12) as you work through a long game or are you a bit hard on yourself?
I was inspired by Pete's sermon yesterday to share my feelings on the topic of living in the middle of our stories. It's one of my favorite topics as I have discovered most of life is lived in the middle, waiting for God to redeem, restore, answer prayers, fulfill promises.
So this week let's talk about living in the middle. Share as you feel comfortable about something you are in the middle of. Or some journey you have been through and how you navigated that middle of the story. How do we learn to trust God in that middle when we don't really know how our story is going to end or don't really like the direction it is going and it doesn't really seem like God is doing anything. (Which is probably what Joseph was thinking when he was sitting in prison all those years.)
Hope you have some great conversations.
Questions for the week:
Introduce yourself. Share more than a resume type introduction
Share any ideas or thoughts you have on mentoring
Share something really daily happening in your life right now.
Remember, share as you feel comfortable. Respect and encourage each other at the place each of you are right now.