Cousin Time: Recent Episodes
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Sometimes you choose your friends, and sometimes you choose your cousins. Jessica and Camryn are college friends turned post-grad roommates learning to navigate the world. Join them as they reminisce on their childhoods, rationalize their Sunday scaries, and ruminate on what it means to be 24.
Merci, mi amor! After a whirlwind cultural exchange, these jetsetters are back and reacclimatizing to the United States. Going abroad simply changed our lives. Enjoy an hour of friends chatting about a trip you didn't go on, filled with "you had to be there" stories. Cheers!
An AVC shot every morning. Red light therapy to end your day. We are always on a journey to become well women. But where do we draw the line? In this episode, Camryn and Jessica decide what wellness fads they love, and which should be left behind.
If you grew up between 2004 and 2010, join us for a dip nostalgia lake. Whether you were nurturing the littlest pets in the shop or a warden of the digital age with your Nintendo DS, unleash your inner child and reminisce on these Gen Z classics! Disclaimer: we are anti-Furby in this studio.
Book club, book club, welcome back to book club! Grab your book, grab your friends, Camryn and Jess are back again! Introducing yet another genre: Romance!
This hot take on star-crossed lovers with a splash of democracy and a sprinkle of international diplomacy is sure to please any reader.
You know the routine by now, this episode is a tell all on the book, and is best enjoyed by those who have finished the book and are of the legal voting age.
If there's one thing we excel at, it's casting judgement. Listen to find out what we think about you!
Rise up! Come one, come all to our perfect utopias. In this episode, we design our dream republic- constitution, governing body, and all that comes with it.
A brand new bombshell has entered the villa. Will (Jessica's twin and a self-identified twink) is in Chicago for the weekend. Tune in for details about their nefarious upbringing, duplicitous high school years, and taking the Windy City by storm. You heard it here first- straight from the gay horse's mouth.
Book club part two, baby!
This month we've gone memoir - "Everything I Know About Love" by Dolly Alderton. This book chronicles Dolly's twenties from love to loss to liquor. As certified experts of being in your twenties- here's our thoughts.
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Like last book club, this episode is a gab sesh on the book in all its glory, meaning it's best enjoyed with ears that are 18+ and have finished the book.
We've done it! Listen to find out what we've done.
PLUS:
-"Please Please Please"
-fostering cats
-going shopping
What time is it? Summertime!!!
This summer is for dreaming, and dream we will! Here's our hopes, wishes, and dreams for this summer.
Welcome to book club! Our monthly series kicks off with an all-time favorite novel of both Jessica and Camryn- A Little Life by Hanya Yanigihara. Pour yourself a cup of tea and settle in for a discussion of this book we don't go a day without thinking about.
This episode does contain spoilers, and the book itself contains adult content, so if you haven't a) read the book and b) turned 18, please return to this episode when you've done both.
Gather round pups, these wolves just had the best weekend of their lives and are here to share. Water slides, mini golf, and free mimosas- it was a howling good time!
It's 2010. August. You put on a brave face and enter the tween dressing room. The lights are alarming florescent. 360 degree view of your adolescent body (thank you funhouse). The jeans won't zip. Your mom has $20 Kohl's Cash burning a hole in her pocket. Natasha Bedingfield will not shut up.
Anyways...any other survivors out there?
Welcome to moms weekend!! Two very special guests join us on this week's episode of the pod- our moms!
We might sound really serious and mature in this episode- it's because our prefrontal cortexes are nearly fully developed. Hellllooooo 25!!
As two young & beautiful girls who are the epitome of perfection, we feel beyond qualified to dive deep into this topic. Lots of things in this world are perfect- including this episode.
Face it- in your dream world, we're co-presidents. And as Madame Presidents, we'd like to present to you...our cabinet.
BREAKING NEWS: I was a bad girl, I did some bad things. If you're also on the edge of your seat waiting for Miss Siwa's new single, you are not alone. Join us for a chat about that and much more, today on News at 9.
Gooooood morning, McKinley High! Warm up your voices, because today's episode is all about Glee! Jess (a Glee superfan) poses Camryn (a Glee novice) with Glee: True or False. Tune in and play along to see if you can detect just how absurd and out of pocket the 2009 cult classic is.
Put me in, coach! This episode is all about the magical world of recreational sports. From MVP to MIP (most improved player) and dodgeball to tag, join us and our very special guest Diana for an episode that's a grand slam, a home run, and all that jazz.
The people have spoken- it's out with the old and in with the new. It's time we take control of our futures. Coming to you hot off the press, we present the Camuarian calendar. To those that celebrate (and please, do!), happy Camuary 1st!
It's the Game of the Year. A collection of the finest players the world has to offer- some even resurrected from the dead.
Jessica and Camryn have drafted their own Superbowl teams, casting celebrities, historical figures, and politicians into the positions they best fit. Who will win- Jessica's Bubblegum Sunday or Camryn's Bananas?
Fans, haters, and questioners of Punxsutawney Phil- unite! Join us for a lecture and Q&A about all things Groundhog Day. How did this tradition start? How has Phil stayed alive this long? How does he spend his days off? Learn all of this and more in this week's episode of Cousin Time.
The boys are back, the boys are back!! Jess and Camryn continue to trail blaze. David and Jacob continue to be our vulnerable little bundles of joy. We all learn the dos and don'ts of using the urinals. Cheers!
Groundbreaking news! The self-choreographed dance worked, and our parents said we can have a sleepover with our cousins. It's time we get to the bottom of one of life's biggest questions- what goes on in the brain of a man? Jess and Camryn courageously venture into uncharted territory, and guest cousins David and Jacob courageously share about their lived experience.
It's dark out there, babygirl, we know. We understand, and we want to help. This is the Cousin Time Survival Guide to Winter. Good luck soldier.
We heard the kids were hungry, and these mamas came to feed. A treat for your ears (and heart, mind, body, soul, etc.). It's not just singing though, think it's only two songs, so rest easy if you hate our angelic voices. Lots of love!!!
New year, new us! This year, we've got BIG goals- go to the doctor, purchase a firesafe box, open a high yield savings account- and BIG hunches- a chess frenzy, a Bieber divorce, and Gypsy Rose's fall from grace. Bingo!
I don't want a lot for Christmas, this is all I'm asking for:
-brand deals
-peace and quiet
-bay windows
School's in session and today we're learning about the Boston Tea Party. This season, we're taking some major (and minor!) historical events and retelling them- bejeweled, bedazzled, and cousin-ified. Pour yourself a cuppa and sit down to learn.
TL;DR- Taxes were up, representation was nil, and satisfaction was at an all-time low.
All aboard! Join us as we share some potentially controversial opinions on the Christmas classics. From Buddy the Elf, to Matthew Morrison's Grinch to Wallace and Gromit (?), we've got lots of friends, foes, and randos. Find out who we think is naughty and nice.
You toss your wavy brown hair up into a messy top knot and throw a Union Jack crop top on. "Come on, Y/N! Someone's here for you!" your mom cries from downstairs. You run to the door, look up, and find two emerald orbs. "'Ello luv, I'm Harry Styles".
If you understood this, we're so sorry. You'll probably like this episode though.
It's that time of year- and we're SO thankful. With grateful hearts and a humble spirit, we rejoice in ushering in a cornucopia of blessings. May your Thanksgiving harvest be bountiful in peace, joy, and delusion.
Halloween is still relevant on November 6, right? These ghouls sure think so. Join us as we share our spookiest encounters with ghosts- at summer camp, in dorms, and all the local haunts of the paranormal.
Imagine a haunted house but it's just car troubles, men catcalling you, and not a single available bathroom. Pretty spooky, if you ask us. Listen if you dare.
Bags packed? Sea bands on? Let's hit the road for the Great American Roadtrip. It's 6am and we've got 300 miles, a Cracker Barrel pitstop, and the drama of a whole family squished into a mini van to go. Hope you packed your headphones!
You're dripping sweat, your dad is making small talk, and the collegiate soccer team is unpacking your mom's mini van. Wow!! What a day!! In the final installment of the Back to School series, Jessica and Camryn discuss their college move-in day and all the boxes, roommates, and honor codes that come with it.
It's your freshman year and you're gonna be here for the next four years. Might as well pledge your allegiance to a subculture! Band, theater, JROTC- choose wisely, this identify will dictate your high school experience.
Color-coded notebooks? Check. Brand new Sketchers? Check. 24 Ticonderogas? Check. A class schedule in accordance with your crush? Pending.
Class is in session and this episode is required reading.
It's been a busy few weeks at CTHQ with new jobs, bachelorette trips, and health insurance galore. Settle in to hear about recent films, dining experiences, and interactions with street poets that have changed our lives.
WARNING: Headphone users, we are so sorry about the first 30 seconds. Skip now or forever hold your peace.
Looking for love!! Swipe right to hear us craft the best (or, worst) dating profiles for one another. We like long walks on the beach, drip coffee, and fresh flowers.
Psst...do you wanna come to my slumber party this Friday? My mom's gonna order pizza and I wanna try out my new camcorder. Also, the new season of Teen Wolf just dropped and I hear Dylan O'Brien is looking soooo smexy!! If we're not too tired, we can maybe even listen to Call Me Maybe 42 times. Don't forget to wear your Uggs- everyone's wearing them.
We're going camping! From hammocks to heat rash, and Life360 to lost limbs, this episode captures all the highs and lows of exploring the great outdoors.
P- pretty! I- intelligent! N- never sad! K- kousin time!
Yeah, we saw Barbie. And, yeah, it changed us. This episode is a ode to girlhood and the magic and madness of it all.
We're baaaaaaaaaaack!! And we have a LOT to talk about. Summer so far has consisted of travel abroad, plumbing issues galore, and a whole lot of World Cup watching. We missed you...did you miss us? :P
What do Taco Mama, Target, and Disney's Animal Kingdom Lodge all have in common? They set the scene for some pivotal moments in the friendship of Jess and Camryn. Join us as we share about the quintessential events that let to codependency and co-hosting. 6 years of friendship in 45 minutes- let's go.
Members of the cabinet. Leaders of our military. Chief Justice, associate justices, and retired justices of the Supreme Court. And to you, my fellow Americans.
IN: soft pretzels, bartering, imagination
OUT: QR codes, pants, FaceTime
Summer...summer...summer! What time is it? SUMMERTIME! Congrats, wildcat, another school year is under your belt, and it's time to take a dip in the pool, a trip to the spa, you get the point. In this episode, Jessica and Camryn reminisce on all things last day of school.
It's 2007. You hop off the school bus, scurry home, and sit yourself in the computer room. Time to clock in- your Webkinz need you. If you've fallen victim to child labor (whether in the Webkinz Employment Office, Farmville, or Papa's Pizzeria), this episode is for you.
Welcome to the Newlywed Game! Except in this case, no one's getting married and that would actually be quite illegal!! Jess and Camryn are giving the age old questions (What's your favorite drink? What would you do if you won the lottery? What's your least favorite state in the union?) a go to figure who knows their cousin better.
Where were you when Taylor and Harry kissed on New Year's Eve? When Zac and Vanessa were caught in an adult store? When Justin rented out Staples Center for Selena? Love, lust, and trauma- this episode is stroll through the celebrity couple hall of fame.
She was a camp counselor, she did the Disney College Program. Can I make it any more obvious? Welcome to the first installment of our Cult Series. In this inaugural episode, Jess and Camryn discuss their own experiences in cult-esque environments and debate what makes a cult.
One of us floored it her first time behind the wheel and one of us took six months to get behind the wheel. But, guess what, they both ended up with tickets. Whether you're team holding on for dear life, or team fearing for dear life, learning to drive is always a wild experience.
Get that feather in your hair and punch out the lenses of your 3D glasses. It's time to revisit the trends, fads, and obsessions of our childhoods. Silly band collectors and lime green survivors, unite!
Happy birthday cousins! In the season 1 finale of Cousin Time, Jessica and Camryn reflect on turning 24, parties of birthdays past, and the je nais se quois of the secret sleepover after a childhood birthday party.
POV: The dance floor is blasting the greatest hits ("Call Me Maybe", "Super Bass", "Diamonds"). You're in your Sunday best (ponytail tying up your t-shirt, knit shawl, nylon dress). The smells are vivacious (oversweet punch, boys who haven't learned to use deodorant, boys who have only learned to use Axe.
That's right- it's 2012 and you're at the middle dance. And, yeah, it's the night of nights, alright?
Alums of liberal arts universities: we see you, we hear you, we are you. We’ve compared Antoni Porowski to Remy the Rat. We’ve marched behind bagpipe players en route to sign an honor code. We’ve eaten quail for a final exam. And today, we’re exploring the novelty, intrigue, and alarm of attending a small, private, liberal arts university.
It’s out with the old and in with the new. Goodbye clouds of gray; hello skies of blue. It’s been a long winter and it’s time for some spring cleaning. Sifting through the closets, dusting off cobwebs, and sending a lot of trash bags off to the thrift store. If it doesn’t spark joy, it’s not staying for spring. What’s in, what’s out, and how are we going to make this spring fabulous?
Start your engines! In this episode, Jess and Camryn sit down with honorary cousin Olivia to discuss what makes us crush and what makes us crash. Cats, cowboy hats, and college tour guides: do they drive us crazy or make our heart race?
They say home is where the heart is, but God, I love the English. Taylor hasn't written any songs about Thailand yet, but we're sure she would love it there, too. In this episode of Cousin Time, Jess and Camryn recount their experiences living in London and Bangkok and all the slays, dismays, and cliches involved.
Happy retirement!! After 8 months of hard work, paying taxes, and giving everything we have to our careers, we're free of labor at last. It's time to unwind with dinner at 4pm, RV travels, and hopefully minimal back pain. But that's what Medicare is for.
Calling all Disney Channel stars, patrons, and wannabes:
This episode is a nostalgic walk down Waverly Place. If you've ever dreamed of staying at the Tipton Hotel, attending East High, or having a closet as glamorous as Miley Stewart- this episode is for you.
Roses are red, violets are blue, these cousins hate flashmobs, how about you? Love is in the air in this episode of Cousin Time- and nothing screams romance like The Lego Movie (in theaters), Vanessa Anne Hudgens, and Pub Subs. Here’s to us all finding the sandwich artist of our dreams.
Jessica craves conflict and Camryn actively avoids it, but in this episode we're both facing it head on. Listen up for our hot takes, our unpopular opinions, and our acrimonious beliefs. From the treachery of the bike lane to the high fashion of ponchos, it's both love and war in this episode of opinions.
Knock, knock, knock, res life!! Put in your headphones because it’s quiet hours on this campus. Jessica and Camryn (in the longest episode yet…sorry!) dish on everything from their resident assistant days. The bulletin boards are hung, the honor code is enforced, and the freshmen parents are comforted on move-in day. Welcome to campus, cousins!
In the next installment of the dream series, Jessica and Camryn discuss their hopes for life at age 30. Are they city mice or country mice? Is their life over or just beginning? Will their kids be friends, enemies, or lovers? It's exciting, yes, but with a healthy dose of existential dread. Plus: ice princess escapades and a list of life-concepts that require further investigation.
From creating Miis for your crush to fighting over Player 1, nothing brings nostalgia like the triumphs and trials of Wii. Fasten your safety straps and connect your nunchucks, because we’re walking down memory lane.
From creating Miis for your crush to fighting over Player 1, nothing brings nostalgia like the triumphs and trials of Wii. Fasten your safety straps and connect your nunchucks, because we’re walking down memory lane.
From creating Miis for your crush to fighting over Player 1, nothing brings nostalgia like the triumphs and trials of Wii. Fasten your safety straps and connect your nunchucks, because we’re walking down memory lane.
No woman, no cry- not so much. In this episode, Jessica and Camryn review their spreadsheet of every time they cried in 2022 and all cry-teria on it.
Happy New Year!! Call it a prediction, a premonition, or a resolution- but let the record show the 25 things we each believe 2023 has to offer us. And our friends. And Harry Styles.
This year, we felt happy, free, confused, and lonely at the same time. We finished up our degrees, moved (more than once!), and started our first full-time jobs. We learned that change is okay, honesty is the best policy, and how to parallel park.
Whether you're rooting for Messi or your holidays get messy, this episode has something for you. We're talking latkes, we're talking Santa, and we're talking soccer. Wherever you land in that Venn diagram, this episode is for both the naughty (Mbeppe) and the nice (Lloris).
In this episode, Jessica and Camryn discuss the certain holiday magic you only find in the hallowed halls of an elementary school in the days leading up to winter break. We’re talking Christmas crafts, Christmas movies, and Christmas concerts (with the ever so inclusive performance of “Dreidel, Dreidel”, of course).
Not yet. It’s the second installment of the Dream Series and we’re discussing our ideal pregnancies- from maternity fashion to pregnancy cravings to the water breaking. Spoiler alert: we want an epidural.
In this episode, we’re taking it way back to 2008 and reminiscing on elementary school specials. If you’ve ever dreaded the Sit and Reach, pulled a fast one on your art teacher during the pointillism unit, or been in the recorder choir, this episode is for you.
Happy Thanksgiving to all our cousins!! In this episode of Cousin Time, Jessica and Camryn discuss the best Thanksgiving dishes, Remy the Rat, and the Planet Fitness stair master.
We don't have something old, new, borrowed, or blue- but we do have a dream. For better or for worse, Camryn and Jessica discuss everything from their dream Bachelorette parties, reception menu, and ways to avoid kissing someone in front of their parents.
We come to this place for magic. We come to Cousin Time to laugh, to cry, to care. Because we need that, all of us. In this episode of Cousin Time, Jessica and Camryn unpack the movies that altered their life’s path and the personality traits, fashion choices, and trauma they caused.
Icky, icky, who’s got the sicky? Whether you’re a perfect attendance champion or a fake ailment con artist, this is sure to be one ~sick~ episode.
Remember the feeling you got when you saw the class mom enter your 2nd grade classroom with her arms full of pumpkin-shaped Utz pretzels? Yeah, we do. This week, Jessica and Camryn discuss all things spooky- from costume contests to haunted car washes to why Halloween 2006 has yet to be topped.