Your Friend E: Recent Episodes
Ekla Limboo
I love reading. Languages interests me;) Not a native English speaker. Any suggestions regarding this channel is gladly accepted. Thank u;) 🤞 PS : I'm from Sikkim, India.
Being born a woman is my awful tragedy. From the moment I was conceived I was doomed to sprout breasts and ovaries rather than penis and scrotum; to have my whole circle of action, thought and feeling rigidly circumscribed by my inescapable feminity. Yes, my consuming desire to mingle with road crews, sailors and soldiers, bar room regulars--to be a part of a scene, anonymous, listening, recording--all is spoiled by the fact that I am a girl, a female always in danger of assault and battery. My consuming interest in men and their lives is often misconstrued as a desire to seduce them, or as an invitation to intimacy. Yet, God, I want to talk to everybody I can as deeply as I can. I want to be able to sleep in an open field, to travel west, to walk freely at night...Sylvia plath
Tis book.. read few years back. Just few pages. Definitely a good read...I mean not just any book u read and forget. It remains in u for a long time or a lifetime even.
I never try to reach out to a lot of ppl...so the odd name of my pod. I know my pod is only for when we have that mood...haehae. It's like pondering about things...and heaving a heavy sigh and kinda learning something from it and now dude...sighhh let's get going kinda Lol. Wouldn't want that energy all the time eh? I just ig do it solely for my own pleasure, in the comfort of my privacy...and if me doing wat i do helps someone in anyway or intrigues someone to listen to it...well, m glad. ;)
When you are young, you wait for the world to save you. You wait for that sorry note from your Mother, and a romance of a lifetime from that guy you had a crush on for the last 3 weeks. You think that a trip would ease your worries away, and a 'miss you' text from that one person who you think about everyday but still don't talk to will help you live a little better. You are alive in your head more than this miserable physical world. You think that you are never going to be fine and maybe this is the best that you can have. But as you grow older, your way of thinking changes. You realize that grand gestures and other people do not save you, mundane things in your everyday life do.
You do not daydream of trips to soothe your mind anymore. Instead, you stand in front of the balcony and look at the glowing orange moon while sipping your cold coffee and somehow it makes you feel a little less lonely. It's as if the moon can look back at you and listen to all the rambles of your heart. You make a playlist for almost everything from cooking in the kitchen to finishing the last episode of your new favourite show. It's like a time capsule that you revisit all the time just to remember how you've lived your life. You buy fifty books in the fare, even the ones you have already read. You romanticize freshly cut grass, and a cold cup of water, and a blue sky full of clouds, and the way trees dance with the storm, and that small lane in your neighbourhood with magnolia and dogwood trees that looks like a scene from some 80's French movie. You collect cups and bowls and socks and wonder how weird it must look to love them. You come home tired and lay on your sofa but the way your home smells makes you feel like you belong somewhere. You realize that intimacy isn't just physical or romantic. You feel it when someone comes to your room for the first time and looks at all your stuff and you find yourself telling them backstories, or when you show someone your collectibles and you notice how they begin to understand you a little more. You watch that movie for the 30th time and eat ice cream and solve puzzles when you feel lonely instead of texting and stalking someone who is not good for your mental health. You catch sunsets every evening because you love the way they remind you that there's a new day ahead, and you like listening to the rustle of the leaves on a gloomy day. You live for your plants and your pets and the little pigeon in your balcony who coos every now and then. You appreciate home cooked meals more, and the way you pause throughout the day to notice your breath, and clean clothes and the way fixing your kitchen does you better than a motivational podcast. Loving these mundane things have taught you more about beauty than a couple of heartbreak poems. You find that you have stopped giving in to unnecessary stress and you live your life by your intentions and not your habits. You empty your pockets and let go of all the things that are too heavy for you to carry. And when someone offers you their half hearted love, you smile and refuse because you have realized that looking for love is synonymous to looking for yourself. When you find who you really are, you find love because they are the same. And instead of waiting for the world to save you, you finally learn to save yourself... (Sorry for the background noise) take care;)
I think about dying but i don't wanna die. Not even close. Infact my problem is the complete opposite. I want to live. I want to escape. I feel trapped & bored & claustrophobic. There's so much to see and so much to do but i somehow still find myself doing nothing at all. I'm still here in this metaphorical bubble of existence and i can't quite figure out what the hell i'm doing or how to get out of it. shared it cause i feel most of us, as we r growing have felt it at some point of our life. Take care guys