This Love Works: Recent Episodes
This Love Works
This Love works is a podcast dedicated to raising the bar for exceptional relationships. Psychotherapist, Marianne Marlow takes you on an exploration into what makes real love work. In each episode, she talks with couples who have mastered the art of healthy, passionate relationships and then dig into topics featuring cutting-edge research and relationships science.
This Love Works gets its juice from Marianne’s 20+ years of clinical experience, PLUS her study of neuroscience, social science, behavioral science, and developmental science.
Sit back and listen to learn the key aspects of relationships that enable couples to have not just good relationships, but extraordinary ones!!
Good Help is Hard to Find – The Therapist Shortage ContinuesWith the shortage of therapists still going on, a lot of people are having a really hard time finding the right therapist to work with them, or with finding anyone at all. Sometimes you might have a therapist who has less experience than you’d want, or who has a particular bias or doesn’t understand something that’s important to you. In this case, the question you’re probably asking yourself is: Should I continue? Can this be a healthy therapeutic relationship?
What’s Part of a Healthy Relationship With Your Therapist, And What’s a Dealbreaker?Therapists are people – they have their own beliefs and opinions, but they are trained to be neutral in the therapeutic environment, so if you’re worried your therapist has a bias, you should bring it to their attention.
It’s one thing if you feel that you disagree on something, but a hard no for me is – if you don’t feel respected, valued, heard by your therapist – that’s a dealbreaker. Those are the things you should be getting from the therapeutic relationship, those are the things you’re paying for, so it’s probably time to find someone else. But the first step is to let your therapist know that that is what your experience is. They can maybe help you figure things out and make the relationship work.
Watch the podcast on YouTube here.
Making Therapy Work for You and for Your RelationshipCouples counseling is highly effective in helping couples to manage conflict in a healthy way, develop a deeper connection, and heal their relationship, but individual therapy is important, too. In fact, I recommend that couples entering counseling together also pursue individual counseling. When you have private sessions with your own therapist, you have your own safe space to work through your feelings first, so you can better understand them and present them to your partner. Many people find this very helpful, and it can elevate your couples sessions.
If you’re ready to lead the life you want and have the relationship you’ve always desired, This LoveWorks can help. We offer couples counseling, hypnotherapy, pre-marital counseling, online courses, and couples workshops and retreats.
Get started today.
The post Episode 11: Should I Continue With a Therapist When We Disagree on Certain Ideas? first appeared on This LoveWorks.
Neuroscience tells us that when we threaten, others will pay attention - because the brain goes into its natural response state to threats - the flight/fright/freeze response. But how do you get your partner to pay attention, without resorting to threats? If you want your partner to pay attention, you should pay attention to these three things.
The post Episode 10: Why Does My Partner Only Pay Attention When I Threaten to Leave? first appeared on This LoveWorks.
When the honeymoon phase is long over, we need to work to be more intentional - to bring novelty back into the relationship. To let your partner know that you see them, you understand them, and you want them. One way you can do this is by checking in with each other and your marriage regularly, and recognizing the areas where your relationship might need a tune-up.
The post Episode 9 – The Importance of a Marriage Tune-up first appeared on This LoveWorks.
Without the full acknowledgement of the affair and ongoing commitment, most relationships can’t heal after an affair, because the fear that comes after infidelity must be dealt with in a real and consistent way. You need to ensure that your person’s needs are being met.
The post Episode 8: The Science of Infidelity first appeared on This LoveWorks.
If your partner is unhappy, but doesn’t want to separate, they’re giving you some very important information - they’re committed to staying in the relationship, but they don’t know what to do. So how do you handle your partner's unhappiness and both get what you need?
Ask yourself:
- Is the unhappiness really about the relationship, or is it about something else?
- What's the most effective way I can support my partner?
- Am I taking too much responsibility for my person's unhappiness?
- How can we work together to both get what we want?
Learn more at www.thisloveworks.com.
In this episode, I want to address a question that keeps coming up with the couples I work with: How do you manage competing viewpoints, desires, and decisions in a relationship? How do you compromise?
First of all, how does our society define compromise? It's an "agreement that's reached by each side making concessions" - yielding to pressure or circumstances and giving something up in the process. The definition goes on to describe it as "admitting defeat." No wonder we avoid compromise! When we feel that we must "lose" and give something we want up, we feel a sense of resentment.
Differences are important in a relationship. Safety and security are created in relationships that experience and honor those differences. When you are clear about what is important to each person, without yielding to what is expected of you, you are able to move past resentment and move compromises in your relationship from "lose-lose" situations to "win-win" situations.
Learn more at www.thisloveworks.com
When your partner is in a high-stress work environment, there’s a need for them to be very focused on their work, especially if they work in a field where focus and time really matter. If someone works as a surgeon or as a first responder, for example, you want them to be focused on caring for others when they are at work or on call, but what happens when our partner is entirely focused on work over the relationship, all the time?
Marianne Marlow, MA, LMHC, talks about it.
A lot of people assume that relationship counseling is only for married couples, who are dealing with major problems like infidelity, but it can be helpful for all couples, and premarital counseling in particular is actually very important. Many couples go into an engagement not having resolved the issues they’re having, or maybe they haven’t yet recognized the negative patterns in their relationship that need to be addressed.
In this episode of the This LoveWorks podcast, Marianne Marlow, MA, LMHC, discusses the top 10 relationship red flags that must be addressed before getting married. These warning signs don’t necessarily mean that you have to call the wedding off! When you put in the work, you can have the relationship - and marriage - of your dreams.
In episode three of the ThisLoveWorks podcast, Marianne delves into the dangers social media can present - even to secure, functioning relationships.
There's a certain allure in social media - especially when it comes to reconnecting with old flames. So, how can couples avoid the temptations and pitfalls of social media?
You can start by being very careful and intentional about how you use social media - especially when it comes to how you talk to your followers about your partner and your relationship.
It often seems one person in the marriage is unhappy. But, does this have to be true? In this episode of the This LoveWorks podcast, Marianne and Kelly talk about the pressures couples face with juggling all the demands of life, work, plus making your marriage work.
In this first episode, Marianne shares her passion for this podcast project and how her personal and professional experiences led her to create This Love Works. Listen in!
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