From My Heart To Yours: Recent Episodes
Linda Vettrus-Nichols
In this podcast you will find that fantasizing about the impossible is totally reasonable, striving for satisfaction is a must, and at the end of the day love and solid relationships are all that matter.
Eva Hoffman: “Growing is about expanding, becoming multicolored and multi shaped like a beautiful garden of flowers. I love watching young people because they are so beautiful. I don't teach secondary school children anymore. It's the age when they are really blossoming. They are just so incredibly beautiful, like a flower. I think, 'how wonderful it would be for me to find out who you are, and what kind of flower you are in this moment'. That's the feeling I get when I see them.
It is interesting that when a plant grows higher, the roots grow deeper. As human beings, we need this balance between growing up and having deep roots. When I think about roots, I also think about people. We come from different countries and we start growing our roots when we are born.
I am Polish and I have lived in England for 40 years now, which is a long time. My father was half Jewish and is Polish. My mother was born in Poland as well. For some people, it's a very big issue when they are uprooted because their roots never grew deep enough. This can happen with plants as well. I think my roots have gone quite deep. I don't have problems changing places. I do get attached to people, rather than places.
Understanding your roots is important.”
Have a listen as I interview my special guest, Eva Hoffman.
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Eva Hoffman: “We have wonderful experiences when we connect with others. I take all of my students, regardless of age, through what I call a self-discovery learning adventure. What we discover is that, although we may seem the same, we are all beautifully different. Because we are beautifully different, we are all special. I am special and you are special. We are all special and it's extremely important that we all realize that fact. A lot of young people, even small children already at school, don't feel that they are special.
Not all children feel that they are special in their own homes. That is something to be remembered. I enjoy teaching my great grandchild positive self-talk. For example saying, “I am special” about themselves. Initially, I had trouble saying that myself.
Some school children are labeled Special Needs. I can sympathize with that and yet I believe that every child is a special needs child. When we believe that, we treat them as individuals.
I also believe that we need to teach children about unity, the fact that ‘we are all one’.”
Have a listen as I interview my special guest, Eva Hoffman.
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Eva Hoffman: “I have been a lifelong learner and yet I never liked school. I didn't like it when I was little and I didn’t like it as a teenager. The moment I left school, things changed. When I became a teacher, I promised myself that if I saw my students not loving to learn, I would change my profession. I believe that it’s a crime if there’s no heart in the teaching or the learning.
I am from a loving family of lifelong learners. My parents were musicians and professionals at a music academy. When my father was eighty-seven years old, this is what I heard as I walked into the house, "Look what I have just learned!" A typical greeting of his.
I was not a bad student. It's interesting, because my friends remember me as a very good student. I don't think I was. I mean, I got the right grades. I managed everything that I needed to manage. I passed all the exams, there was no problem of that kind. There also was no heart in the teaching. I had only one teacher who really taught me something that I carry on until today. In my mind that was not good enough. I promised myself that as a teacher, I’d be remembered in a different way.
I've been extremely interested in people and when you get to know them, when you are interested in them, the next step is loving them.
I have always loved teaching and when I have a chance to teach, I feel the connection. I feel love.”
Have a listen as I interview my special guest, Eva Hoffman.
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Carol Banens: “I am grateful for the gratitude journaling I have done for years. I am also grateful that I continued writing in that journal after my husband died. I did it every night, no matter what. I can remember sitting upstairs with my diary open thinking, 'what am I grateful for?' And I made sure I found something, whether it was my warm bed in the winter or the air conditioning in the summer.
Grief is about looking back and looking at loss.
People tend not to live in the present moment. We're either worried and thinking about what went wrong, what we should have done or we are busy getting anxious about the future.
The wonderful thing about gratitude is that we can keep adding it into our day. This is when the joy of life returns.”
Have a listen as I interview my special guest, Carol Banens.
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Carol Banens: “Once you're in grief, and you've lost someone, you realize there's so much more that perhaps you could have done for them, listened to them, or asked of them. I'm a piano player. My dad was a surgeon and quite a good jazz pianist. He'd say, practice hymns and play chords, it will give you chord sequences. And of course, I never listened because he was my dad. After he'd gone, I ended up marrying a jazz pianist. That's when I realized, oh, my dad was right. If only I had done that. Did I learn from that? Not enough.
I relished my husband, but not as much as I could. I think we can always do more.
I didn't ask him to teach me a really groovy Happy Birthday. When you're at a birthday party and there’s a piano and people find out you can play piano they often say, "Can you play Happy Birthday?" And it's like, “No”. That's such a silly little thing. But it's one of those things I wonder about. That was Brian's skill. He was a musician. Why didn't I tap into that? Was it because I was always too busy?
I was too busy to smell the roses. I was working and looking after my mom.
We don't know how long others will be with us or we with them. So, taking the time to appreciate who you have with you and why they're with you is important. If only we could hear that lesson before they are gone so that we can do it in advance.”
Have a listen as I interview my special guest, Carol Banens.
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Carol Banens: “Being kind can mean so many different things. When it comes to grief, it doesn't mean trying to fix grief. Let's get that out there. Because you don't fix grief, you live through it. You get to work through it. In grief, being kind to yourself can be calling on a friend for a chat, monitoring the intensity of your grief, or journaling about your grief (what you’ve lost and what you still have). Being kind to others in grief is about remembering that they are on decision overload. They might not even know what they want or what they need.
When my husband died, and before I could even think about mowing the lawn, my realtor sent over a lawn crew. This continued all summer. What a gift and a blessing. Talk about instilling gratitude! It took away a burden I didn’t even know I had. It was one less thing for me to think about.
So when I think about being kind, sometimes it's the practical things that make all the difference in the world.”
Have a listen as I interview my special guest, Carol Banens.
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Carol Banens: “It doesn't matter how someone dies, grief is immense. We get to remember that fact. When my husband died, I pushed everything down so I could go back to work, so I could manage things, and it came back to bite me for not dealing with it. It's exhausting to put on a facade of 'I'm fine', if you're not. As soon as we start to have these conversations, as soon as we're with compassionate people who will sit with us and listen, let us put our head on their shoulder or go for a walk with us, it softens our grief. Community coming together is such a beautiful way of dealing with any sort of trouble because it allows us to see the connection between people.
It's so important to talk when you are ready to talk. Grief has to be witnessed, it has to be heard. And the more we talk about it, the more we stop resisting it and pushing it down.”
Have a listen as I interview my special guest, Carol Banens.
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Iana J. Daniels: “Every day is an opportunity for plenty of things, especially change. We are not perfect beings, we are not infallible, we are human. The world is not perfect. The game is rigged. You are going to make mistakes. Anyone who has decided they know how you should live your life, has no idea how to live their own. I was guilty of that as well.
One of my coaches called me out. She said, ‘You need to get rid of your instruction manual, the one for other people's lives’. I'm the eldest. In my mind, I had an instruction manual for how my youngest sister should live her life, because she was my responsibility. A day later, I was having a conversation with my mom and she said, ‘I know you feel like your babysitter is like your kid, but as your mother, I say, Let that go. She is an adult’.
That was the day I realized that I had to allow my younger sisters to live their own lives.”
Have a listen as I interview my special guest, Iana J. Daniels.
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Iana J. Daniels: “When we realize that everything is temporary we begin to develop the fear of missing out (FOMO). Growing up in Guyana, there are two phrases that older people say all the time. As a young girl, I didn't quite understand it. I understood it more as I grew older. The first one is, ‘You know that you're getting older, when you have fewer friends’. And the other one I recall hearing was, ‘I’m tired. I’m ready’. My maternal grandmother lived until she was 104 so you can imagine how many times she used that phrase.
As I got older, I realized what they meant. ‘I've lived a life. I feel complete, and I am fine. I am at peace with the world no matter what happens.’
In every situation and every experience, you learn something about you and you learn something about the world. So you still come out of a difficult time in your life with a lesson and a blessing.
We get to create and recreate our stories from our lessons and our blessings. We do that from our intuition. Like, something’s just not feeling right and that's okay, I can make a different decision.”
Have a listen as I interview my special guest, Iana J. Daniels.
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Iana J. Daniels: “One of my supervisors said, ‘Iana, you take yourself so seriously, you don't have to. Smile a little bit. Everything does not have to be a problem to solve. With some things, you can just let them go’. I've always had laughter in my life. For a while, it was a coping mechanism, instead of crying. When I learned about belly laughing, I realized that's the type of laugh I do when I am truly happy or find something really, really funny. It's not the laugh I do when I'm trying to make myself enjoy something.
When it comes to suicide, we see things on social media how the person who had just ended their life by suicide was seen just the night before laughing at a party, seeming to be having a wonderful time.
There was a time in my life where if I wasn't doing something, I didn't feel productive or I felt something was wrong. Nowadays, some days are what I call a pajama day. I do nothing and I even stay in my PJs all day.
I now watch the sunrise and the sunset. I often wonder how many more sunrises and sunsets I have left in my lifetime and how many of them will I miss? How many of those have I missed because I was too busy doing other things? So, sunrises and sunsets happen whether or not we pay attention to them. Watching them is a great way to slow down literally and metaphorically.
I also remember to dance in the rain.”
Have a listen as I interview my special guest, Iana J. Daniels.
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Iana J. Daniels: “If you told me as a teenager sitting in Guyana, South America that I would be here talking to you on this platform, sharing parts of my journey, I would have said you're on some very good stuff.
There's a quote, I read one time, it said, 'Life is like a roller coaster, just hold on tight and enjoy the ride'. It was and I did hold on tight.
I also feel sure about the enjoyment part, even though there was a lot of trauma and shame early on in my life.
And like a roller coaster, it's been intense.
I even ended up in military service, in the US Army. That was one of those things that I did not have planned for me. I wanted nothing to do with military service. I was presented with an opportunity to have my student loans paid off, in addition to being able to have my graduate degree, as many of them as I wanted, subsidized, while at the same time making a living. Those three things for me came down to one word: independence.
I gave them 21 years of my life when I only intended to give them the three that they needed.
I wouldn't recommend anyone going to college to pay for college the way I did, because you introduce unnecessary suffering into your life.
I got through with a combination of student loans, credit cards, and a partial track scholarship.
Be prudent about any type of student loan.
Credit cards, definitely not as a student. During the first month of a new semester there's nothing but credit card companies at the student union.
It’s easy to get into credit card debt, especially when you don’t have a job.”
Have a listen as I interview my special guest, Iana J. Daniels.
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Mike Stevenson: “I believe that young people should have special sittings with local and national governments. It might add more voices to the cacophony of politicians and yet we need to hear those voices. We need to give young people a sense that they are part of the solution, and we need to listen to them now.
Reforming democracy sounds complicated. It's not. They've done it in places like Norway, where the young people were leaving because all the industry was gone. They brought young people in as part of the political solution. That's the thing to do. It's also about asking the right questions. For example, "What's going to encourage you to stay in this town?"
Every human being has enormous capacity. When you see it in children, you realize just how great that capacity is.
We tend to keep young people compliant. Listen to us, we know best, rather than hearing their ideas.
When we start exploring the creativity and the imagination of all parts of the community, we find richness. I have been able to do this. I have worked with people and communities. I have held big idea sessions and shown groups of people how extraordinary ideas have taken root around the world.”
Have a listen as I interview my special guest Mike Stevenson.
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Mike Stevenson: “A child will say, "I want a city that is designed for all of us". And in response, an adult will say, "Where is the budget coming from? Can we do it? There's too much opposition.” They will take a position that's going to be immediately adversarial.
Changemakers in the world draw people in because they don't complicate things with policies and facts. They just say, "We want a city designed for people and all those plants and creatures that inhabit the world".
I do believe in young people and I'm at the age where so many of my contemporaries are dissing them and referring to them as snowflakes.
This is a political weapon to attack young people and people who are more liberal minded. This really is an attack tactic.
We have problems in the world that must be addressed now. There must be some leverage of the money that has been amassed in tax havens. We get to stop that and the world needs to agree on that now. It's part of the process for repairing the world. We get to start considering and noticing the planet.
There's actually a great deal of enthusiasm to do that. The only stoppers are those who have a vested interest in retaining the status quo. That's why I believe in giving leadership to young people, because they get it. Their future is at stake.”
Have a listen as I interview my special guest Mike Stevenson.
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Mike Stevenson: “It's time to rebalance our understanding of what money is about. When it comes to greed, we can pin it down to three things these days: business, money, and politics. We've allowed business to kind of morph into unfettered greed and we’ve allowed greed to grow. Business is a force for good and business should be a force for good. The market can solve problems and yet we've allowed it to get out of control.
We now have a situation where the sixty-four richest people in the world, multi-billionaires, own more than the entire bottom half of the global population.
They see themselves as successful. Yes. Okay. They've had great business ideas and implemented them. At this point they are people who are making money simply by having money and investing it. I don't think they're earning it. I think it's spurious to claim that people are earning it and it’s so much money, they can't even spend it within their lifetime. The worst part is that they keep charging the rest of us higher and higher prices. That's what I mean by greed.
Politicians are elected with money and are mainly made by money. That means that power and control are held by the people who have exercised the greatest greed.
We get to separate money from politics.
We are living in really difficult times. The voices that will be heard come from people asking audacious questions and we need answers to those questions.
The best leaders are people who live in some of our most impoverished communities, because leadership becomes a necessity to survive. People seem to think there is some kind of leadership gene. There isn’t. We've allowed bad leadership in politics. Now we get to reroute politics to communities where we live. That's where the power should be, because the people are sovereign. It's the whole foundation of democracy. We've gone beyond that.”
Have a listen as I interview my special guest Mike Stevenson.
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Mike Stevenson: “I was born to a Scottish-Irish father, and a Lebanese mother who had grown up in Egypt. So it was quite a mix to be born into as a cultural being. I spent three years in Pakistan between the ages of three and six-and-a-half. On the way back to Scotland, we got caught in Egypt. It was at the time of the Suez Crisis with the British government. I remember the troops on the shore of Port Said; we got out just before the Suez Canal was closed.
I came back to Scotland, which I barely knew because I had traveled to Pakistan at age three. I found it cold and gray.
Settling into school was extraordinarily difficult for me because I had started kindergarten in Lahore, Pakistan. Evidently I spoke pretty decent Urdu. I can only remember a few words of it now. It's so incredible how children just absorb information in extraordinary ways because they are so adaptable.
I ended up attending a total of three different primary schools and I hated it. I hated the whole school experience.
When I went to high school, it wasn't any better. I just could not settle myself. I was fidgety, distracted, disinterested, and bored. I was constantly thinking of the Beatles and The Rolling Stones, and being a rock star. I wanted to stand on stage, and at the age of thirteen that's exactly what I did. I started a band. At school, none of that counted for anything, because you are judged entirely on academic grounds. So it was no surprise that by the age of fifteen, I was asked to leave school on no uncertain terms.
My parents were going through a divorce and it was horrible. It was nasty. I escaped to London to get away from it all. I got a job in a shop selling furniture and it was all going well until it wasn't. Apparently, none of the customers could understand a word I said because of my Scottish accent.
So I was sacked three days into my first job.
I ended up sleeping out for about a year, which was quite formative in negative as well as positive ways. It was a challenging and threatening experience where I learned that I could survive and found out who I was as an individual. After that, I went through an extraordinary journey.”
Have a listen as I interview my special guest Mike Stevenson.
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Lisa Gable: “Managing relationships is twofold. One of the first things is ‘do what's right for you’. Determine how you want to interact with the world. Make sure you are willing to interact from a positive point of engagement, take the time to understand someone, and let them understand you. At the same time you are learning how to set boundaries, especially at the beginning of your career, and of course throughout your entire life.
When it comes to mentorship, I see the mentee and mentor as a process where they are investing in each other's success. This includes friendships, special relationships with relatives, and in the business world as well.
It's important to take time to invest in our relationships. There's a benefit to the giver and the receiver of anything. In our professional careers, we can't just focus on climbing the ladder. It's important to make sure others are climbing with us. By doing so we become so much stronger.
I’ve always wanted to be Jimmy Stewart in the movie “It’s a Wonderful Life”. That’s what I aspire to! Hearing people talking about what you did for them and how it built an opportunity that they might not have had, feels really good.
There’s great satisfaction in helping other people and not just focusing on yourself.”
Have a listen as I interview my special guest, Former US Ambassador, Lisa Gable.
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Lisa Gable: “We see people on their good days and we see them on their bad days. We make assumptions about who they are as a result of how they exhibit their personality at a moment in time. The reality is–we don't know what's going on in that person's life, we really don't.
So if you start with the assumption that the person with whom you are dealing is a good person and perhaps the way in which they are reacting to a situation isn't what you would want, there is hope that you could come to know them better.
This gives us the opportunity to appreciate who they truly are as a whole person.
We have a tendency to be very judgmental, especially today in social media and politics when we’ve only seen a tiny aspect of someone's life.
In managing people for over forty years, I am always stunned at how someone would immediately assume their colleague was out to get them. It's been even more noticeable in the last five years.
My father was so amazing at finding something uniquely special about everyone he met. Even if they were the most annoying person on the face of the earth, he could find a specialness in them.
So look for that unique special kernel of an individual and help bring it out of them, so together you can explore it.”
Have a listen as I interview my special guest, Former US Ambassador, Lisa Gable.
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Lisa Gable: “Sometimes we doubt ourselves and sometimes we doubt our ability to analyze what's going on around us. It may be how we are working with another individual or it might be how we're perceiving shifts that are going on in our communities.
The reality is we actually know the answers to our questions, we can trust our instincts, and our decisions.
I use decision trees. There is a starting point and a path to follow. As long as you have a clear vision, then you will have clarity in making decisions. Each decision leads to another question. If the answer is ‘Yes’ then you follow that path. If the answer is ‘No’, then that leads to another set of questions.
Your gut will tell you the right direction to go.
Type A people have a plan for their lives. That doesn’t mean we have to follow someone else's plan for how they see us fitting into their lives.
The world is changing so rapidly today. It helps to have a vision as to what you want your life to be, the impact that you want to have, and where you see your greatest opportunity. At the same time you get to zig and zag, which means to pivot. We saw that over and over again through COVID. As leaders, we would make decisions and yet something would happen within the supply chain or employees would get sick or money would be short. We were constantly having to pivot, while keeping our eye on what we ultimately wanted to achieve. I believe that applies to life as well.”
Have a listen as I interview my special guest, Former US Ambassador, Lisa Gable.
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Lisa Gable: “I've had an incredible opportunity to do turnarounds in business, government, and philanthropy. I started my career during the Reagan administration at the age of nineteen. I was at the Pentagon during the Cold War at the age of twenty-one. And then moved over to the White House. So you can’t have a greater inflection point than the end of the Cold War.
When I moved out of Washington, DC I went to Arizona, Taiwan, and then California. I stayed in Silicon Valley for fifteen years and I met my husband there. Jim worked for Apple. I had left Intel Corporation and started my own company. We married two years later. We’ve been married for twenty-seven years, during which time we adopted our daughter and she is now working on her profession in Texas.
Jim and I have similar work histories, we understand the world of politics and philanthropy because that has been a core area where our families have invested. So, we come to life with a desire to value differences.
Even though we may have certain opinions, we focus a great deal on finding the good in people. We identify a place where we agree with another person in order to build a relationship. The reality and quality of life comes down to people in our personal relationships.”
Have a listen as I interview my special guest, Former US Ambassador, Lisa Gable.
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Eva Vennari: “When we honor ourselves, that's our true power. And when others honor themselves, that's when co-creation can happen. This is when two healthy beings come together to create and teach others. We teach people by example. When you know who you are you teach others how to interact with you. That's honoring yourself and it's sometimes holding people's feet to the fire. And I'm okay with doing that.
Discomfort leads to growth.”
Have a listen as I interview my special guest Eva Vennari!
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Eva Vennari: “Be you is about not concerning yourself with what other people think about you, because their opinion of you doesn't matter. Integrity is the agreement that you have with yourself to be only you and not allow others to compromise it. When you are you and blending your personality with your higher self you have a greater power that you might not have been aware of before. It's an unshakable wisdom.
You are physically the magic, you're the reason why things can manifest. You're the reason why things can change.
When somebody says to you, and they said it to me many times, Eva, we're not here to change the world.
I argue.”
Have a listen as I interview my special guest Eva Vennari!
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Eva Vennari: “With the tunnel vision we get when we are in pain, we tend not to notice what is outside of us. I can remember a particular moment, when I was chronically ill and laying on the couch. My girls were very little and I was so fatigued that I could not get up and tuck them into bed. I said, "Come here. Give me a hug. You have to tuck yourselves in tonight. I can't do it. I can't move from here”.
Being chronically ill, we lose perspective. We lose connection with ourselves and others.
As I got stronger and my body was able to fight, my focus shifted away from the pain to, "Oh, my gosh, I have children that I need to raise! What do you guys need?"
There are red flags that we ignore and it's important to pay attention.
Learning how to listen in a way that is not a knee jerk reaction is important. Being emotionally intelligent is one thing, you can know what you're feeling. But unless you know what to do with it, you're not being wise about it. In other words, EQ (Emotional Intelligence) has nothing to do with wisdom.
When we're in that place of tunnel vision, we forget that there are others around us who need us, want us, can help us, and are a part of us.”
Have a listen as I interview my special guest Eva Vennari!
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Eva Vennari: “I was a hot mess as a previously sick corporate ladder climber, attempting to climb my way through the corporations of America. I was not making good progress, and it was beating me down. I became chronically ill, which included chronic fatigue, anxiety, insomnia, depression, fibromyalgia, itchy skin, heart palpitations, short term memory loss, hypothyroidism, and more than I care to remember.
There are many doorways to becoming a whole person.
It's not just one modality, it's a journey back to wellness. I knew I didn't want to be on medication. I knew I needed to start somewhere, and because I'm a stubborn Italian, my Sicilian served me well. So, one night, blessed with insomnia, and up at three o'clock in the morning, I Googled the list of ailments my doctors had found. I began digging through one weird article after another and I came across mineral balancing. What I was reading made sense to me, ‘give your body what it needs, it can heal itself’. Well, how do you know what it needs? Hair analysis and mineral balancing solves that problem. I sometimes forget how far I've come.
We have to get over the idea that we are in charge of what our body is going to heal. This is why I couldn't just create an app or a course. I tried to create a curriculum that everyone could just follow. It didn't work out because each person needs what they need the moment their body goes to the next level of healing.
Chronic fatigue is invisible in a way because you're not in a wheelchair, and yet it's not invisible energetically. People can pick up on it and they are less likely to engage with you and therefore your relationships suffer.”
Have a listen as I interview my special guest Eva Vennari!
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Nicole M. Heimann: “Power in itself is a neutral word. It all depends how we use it. If we come from a position of taking power over other people, nobody likes that. And that's where people make negative associations. We can be powerful individuals and create something great together. So to take away the confusion, I like to use the terminology power versus force from David Hawkins work.
When we are not being our bright authentic selves, in our essence and connected to our true power, we will either give our power away or abuse power. It's important to know when we are in our power and who we are when we give our power away. I teach my clients to ask the question, 'Who am I when I am stressed?' Because that's when we use power over people.
Leaders tend to diminish their own talents. When I say, 'Wow, this is really impressive. This is how you do it'. And I mirror their talent. Their response is 'Yeah, it's okay'. And I say, 'No, own it'. This is a superpower, this is really influential. You get to own it more. When they own it more, their impact increases.”
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If you would like to know more about the process of creating a new world, you won’t want to miss this interview with my guest Nicole Heimann.
Find out how to get in touch with your essence so you are able to be authentic, influential, and inspirational.
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Nicole M. Heimann: "Freedom is permission to be who we are, and independent of needing others' approval. Being okay with the fact that some people will resonate with our energy and some will not is true freedom. When we are free, that's when we are really powerful. Being unapologetically you is about taking a stand for your freedom.
Taking a stand is a big one for me. Far too many leaders are afraid they will be judged for being authentic and that's not what our world needs. So I give them permission. They have to want it, they have to believe in it, and they have to be courageous. It takes courage to go in front of a board that is more focused on short term profits, rather than on the long term impact and how their decisions will affect the planet.
Once I get my clients in touch with their essence and reconnected with their values then we look at the values of their company. When CEOs step into their full authenticity and pursue their own freedom, they are able to take a stand for what they believe in. Then they mobilize their organization around it."
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If you would like to know more about the process of creating a new world, you won’t want to miss this interview with my guest Nicole Heimann.
Find out how to get in touch with your essence so you are able to be authentic, influential, and inspirational.
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Nicole M. Heimann: “The word authenticity means a lot to me. I've also written a book about it–‘How to Develop The Authentic Leader in You’. I went really deep with this book because I believe authenticity is very misunderstood. I've had leaders who say, 'Well, I'm emotional and I'm impulsive. That's who I am and people have to deal with it'. That's not being authentic. It's being unconscious and not taking responsibility for your own behavior.
I believe that authenticity should be a verb. It's a process constantly evolving into the next best version of ourselves that incorporates taking responsibility for the impact we have. It takes a lot of courage to be authentic. I believe that life offers all of us opportunities where we must choose. 'Do I live in my deeper truth with the people around me or not?'
We get to choose. Life's a choice. Choosing to be authentic is a courageous act.
Authenticity gets us to our essence. That's really what authenticity is, it's who we really are at our core. It's important that we get to know our essence, that we feel it and experience it. I use a visualization process with my clients that really cuts through all the layers of their wounds and takes them to the essence of who they are.
Every baby radiates light.
We are born in our full essence and therefore we are born completely free. Then being influenced by the negativity of others, we eventually build a wall around us. We start to confuse the wall with our essence and start believing that we are everything that is in
the wall. Eventually we become a wall no longer in touch with our emotions and being controlled by our wounds.
The way I work with this image of essence and the wall around it is to suggest repositioning the wall. Our essence begins to take up more space, which means the wall will have to shrink. Then working with CEOs, I teach them to ask themselves, 'Am I in my essence or am I in the wall right now?' Once they have their answer, they can choose which place they want to lead from.
Coming from our essence we are always influential and inspirational. So when we are in our power, we are in our essence and able to be authentic."
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If you would like to know more about the process of creating a new world, you won’t want to miss this interview with my guest Nicole Heimann.
Find out how to get in touch with your essence so you are able to be authentic, influential, and inspirational.
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/linda-vettrus-nichols/message
Nicole Heimann: “Creating a new world is what we are all in the process of doing right now. And definitely what is needed. We have proof enough that what we created over the past thousands of years doesn't work. The realization that we can create our own reality and that we are not victims of circumstances, started very early in my life. Of course to create, we need to believe that anything is possible.
When I remarried a couple of years ago, we merged two households. When people asked what we wanted for wedding gifts, we started a foundation where they could donate some money and help save the Amazon Rainforest.
The whole experience of going to the Amazon and spending time with the communities there, allows us and the CEOs we take with us to be disconnected from our modern world. It's a very visceral experience.
The learning actually takes place in one's cells.
One of the learnings that I find extremely powerful is that you gain insight through simplicity by embracing complexity. This learning comes from the whole experience of being there. When you feel that and you see that, you automatically learn to be okay with complexity.
Most CEOs are not connected to their intuition.
Once they are immersed into the culture of the Amazon, they start seeing how everything is connected and they reconnect with themselves. They start to see the simplicity of embracing complexity, and they begin to experience solutions coming through them. Not being up in their heads is very new for them. Their phone and computer are no longer a distraction for them. They are completely cut off from the modern world of tech. They are surrounded by nature.
The transformation is priceless and really shows them how important it is to reconnect. In the modern world, we go into nature to take a walk. We forget that we are not just part of nature, we are nature.”
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If you would like to know more about the process of creating a new world, you won’t want to miss this interview with my guest Nicole Heimann.
Find out how to gain insight through simplicity by embracing complexity.
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/linda-vettrus-nichols/message
𝗦𝗼𝗽𝗵𝗶𝗮 𝗝𝗮𝗰𝗼𝗯𝘀 (𝗦𝗼𝗽𝗵𝗶𝗲): “The paradox of life is a huge thing to comprehend, and can be really unsettling. The mind wants some sort of ultimate truth that makes sense. The more I connect spiritually to life, the more I find that it's a living paradox to just exist.
When we connect with ourselves, we have more compassion for the people around us and for people all over the world. We start to encounter more synchronicities and begin to realize that the world is more connected than we could have ever imagined.
As we connect to ourselves on a deeper level, we connect to an aspect of intelligence that's not strictly regulated to cognition.
As we connect with the world more deeply we get information that we wouldn't otherwise have access to. Information that helps us to be of great service and assistance to the collective healing of this world.”
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If you would like to know more about tapping into your inner knowing, you won’t want to miss this interview with my guest Sophie Jacobs.
Find out how spiritual courage is about slowing down and realizing that everything is temporary.
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𝗦𝗼𝗽𝗵𝗶𝗮 𝗝𝗮𝗰𝗼𝗯𝘀 (𝗦𝗼𝗽𝗵𝗶𝗲): “The word Temporary means that everything is impermanent, which is a basic truth in Buddhism. If we aren't connected to that understanding, it can really cause a great deal of suffering. There's this aspect of life, that every time we try to grasp onto something, it slips away. Even when our intentions are good or an idea is good, it's still temporary.
Humans feel safe when things feel permanent, stable or fixed. Things might have that sort of essence to them, however they are temporary. So, how do we get in touch with that aspect, without causing ourselves more suffering?
We can view the temporal nature of life as a gift, a rising urgency within us. This moves us forward in our reality or what you might say is your soul's calling, your intuitive guidance.”
*
If you would like to know more about tapping into your inner knowing, you won’t want to miss this interview with my guest Sophie Jacobs.
Find out how spiritual courage is about slowing down and realizing that everything is temporary.
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/linda-vettrus-nichols/message
𝗦𝗼𝗽𝗵𝗶𝗮 𝗝𝗮𝗰𝗼𝗯𝘀 (𝗦𝗼𝗽𝗵𝗶𝗲): “Connection is vital to being human. It's an ingredient of life that is life itself. When I think about the word connection on a global scale, what comes to mind for me right now is general malaise. Vivek Morganti, who is the US Surgeon General said that loneliness is about or worse than smoking a pack of cigarettes a day. When we are disconnected, alienated or alienating others we are actually disconnecting from life itself. Which is giving us even less life to live.
It's so sad. What kinds of connections are you fostering? Are they connections at the soul level? Is your heart integrated with the rest of your being?
What happens when we're online or when we're rushed, we disconnect from our bodies. When we disconnect from our body, we disconnect from our human nature; and when we disconnect from our nature, we actually stop trusting ourselves. We stop trusting in life itself, in the regenerative aspects of life, and in the goodness of life.
Disconnection is a huge problem for ourselves as well as others.”
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If you would like to know more about tapping into your inner knowing, you won’t want to miss this interview with Sophie Jacobs.
Find out how spiritual courage is about slowing down and really connecting.
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/linda-vettrus-nichols/message
𝗦𝗼𝗽𝗵𝗶𝗮 𝗝𝗮𝗰𝗼𝗯𝘀 (𝗦𝗼𝗽𝗵𝗶𝗲): “I was about to graduate from college when the COVID-19 pandemic hit. I moved to my mom's place to finish up online. I lived there for a couple of months after graduation, just figuring out what I was going to be doing. I ended up joining a startup.
While all that was happening, it was one of the worst years of wildfires in California.
There were multiple dry lightning strikes, which caused a lot of fires in neighboring counties. None of them were extremely close. It definitely left us all on edge, especially me seeing that I was home alone most of the time.
When I found a dead bird on the doorstep it felt like a signal or an omen. There was some sort of knowingness in me and a feeling of "oh no" like life was being drained out from under my feet. Later that night I had an urge to just leave. I grabbed my backpack and I left with my two dogs.
In the morning, I found out that the whole house had been decimated by a firenado. A tornado of fire had ripped through our neighborhood, killing a couple of our neighbors.
That experience really brought my life into focus.
I got the message that life is precious. Not only is life precious, my body had communicated something to me that had saved my life and yet what was that? What is that? I wanted to know more. This hunger became the guiding force of my life without even having a language for it. That question recentered my priorities and I really wanted to focus on my spiritual life. I went to a Buddist monastery and studied for a year. I was even ordained as a nun. During that time, it became even clearer that this sort of intelligence within me was really important.
When we are on a path of awakening, it's important to distill what's true for us and to cut out all of the extra noise. So that became a major theme. One night a thought landed in my head three times, ‘I should write a book about intuition’.
When it comes to thoughts, it can be difficult to figure out if it carries a certain weight or if it's just a thought. That particular thought had come in threes and I had experienced an energetic resonance with it. I had been quiet enough to hear that lingering calling within the thought, at least enough to inch one centimeter closer to that reality.
My next thought was in the form of a question, 'I wonder what would happen if I did write a book? That's kind of a silly idea, and yet I wonder.’
What initially started out as a series of journal entries around intuition, insight, and inner knowing became a book. I not only became an author… what I wrote about became a huge force in my life.”
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If you would like to know more about tapping into your inner knowing, you won’t want to miss this interview with my guest Sophie Jacobs.
Find out how spiritual courage is about slowing down and really listening.
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/linda-vettrus-nichols/message
𝗠𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗮𝗺 𝗭𝘆𝗹𝗯𝗲𝗿𝗴𝗹𝗮𝗶𝘁, “𝗗𝗿. 𝗭”: “Self-awareness is my mantra. You'll hear me repeat that word again and again. Identify what you can and cannot control. We have power and we are not a puppet. I am not a puppet. Therefore, I can make my own decisions. I can decide who has power or influence over the things I will do. Who I will pay attention to and allow them to give me advice. Who I will take seriously. What will hurt me and what will never hurt me, because I will not allow it to touch me. This gives me independence, freedom, and responsibility. Most anything that is happening to me is happening because I allow it or I do not allow it.
I am not very comfortable with the unknown. Even though I'm uncomfortable, fearful or justifying things, I remind myself that it's important to make a decision. I also remind myself that not making a decision is still a decision.
I believe it’s important to be the writer of your book, the editor of your story, and the principal actor of your life.”
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If you know it’s time for a change in attitude, you won’t want to miss this conversation with my guest “Dr. Z” (Miriam Zylberglait).
Find out how you can let go so you can enjoy a career, family, and better health.
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/linda-vettrus-nichols/message
𝗠𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗮𝗺 𝗭𝘆𝗹𝗯𝗲𝗿𝗴𝗹𝗮𝗶𝘁, “𝗗𝗿. 𝗭”: When I get riled up in negative thinking, I like to transform those thoughts into something positive. That's definitely more difficult for me. I get energy from being negative and yet it's not productive energy.
Our brain is so powerful. Sometimes we need to tell our brain to pause and relax. If we’ve been working on the computer and we lose everything we just did for the past 3 hours that’s quite upsetting. We can throw a tantrum, scream, cry, and/or throw our computer across the room or we can realize we are in a critical moment of choice.
Self-talk is quite helpful: ‘This is so unfair. I also don’t need this frustration right now. I still need to get this done, so I’m going to put this negative energy into a box and deal with it later, when I can process it calmly.’
We get to set our own boundaries, and yet in the end we are our own worst enemies. We are the ones who allow things to happen to us. Sometimes we can protect ourselves from others and yet we find it very hard to protect ‘us’ from ourselves.”
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If you know it’s time for a change in attitude, you won’t want to miss this conversation with my guest “Dr. Z” (Miriam Zylberglait).
Find out how you can let go so you can enjoy a career, family, and better health.
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/linda-vettrus-nichols/message
𝗠𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗮𝗺 𝗭𝘆𝗹𝗯𝗲𝗿𝗴𝗹𝗮𝗶𝘁, “𝗗𝗿. 𝗭”: "I am not a victim and you are not a victim" means that we have the power inside ourselves or around us with our friends, community, or the system to achieve a far better situation.
We can let go of what we can't control.
We will have challenges, difficult situations, and feel cold moments. That doesn't mean we have to tolerate everything that happens to us or around us.”
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If you know it’s time for a change in attitude, you won’t want to miss this conversation with my guest “Dr. Z” (Miriam Zylberglait).
Find out how you can let go so you can enjoy a career, family, and better health.
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/linda-vettrus-nichols/message
𝗠𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗮𝗺 𝗭𝘆𝗹𝗯𝗲𝗿𝗴𝗹𝗮𝗶𝘁 (𝗗𝗿. 𝗭): “I've had the opportunity, pleasure, and challenge to have transformed myself many times. I would imagine most people feel the same way. It's a demonstration of growth. Three points in my life have been very important regarding transformation.
The first one was falling in love eleven years ago: leaving my country, career, parents, and friends. When I arrived in the US I changed my specialty as a doctor as well as learning a new language. I feel that was one of my most challenging transformations because I became a mother towards the end of that transition. A complete transformation from a single woman in one country to a married woman with kids in another.
My second one was also big. After having COVID-19, I decided or should I say was “forced” to decide to reassess my life. I was living a life that was very centered on my professional achievements. I'm not one for getting more titles or money. Those have never been my goals. All I've ever wanted to do is to help people solve their health issues and change things for their good. I crossed the line and went from being a healthy empathetic health care provider to a person with unhealthy boundaries and empathy.
I became an unhealthy advocate for others, negatively affecting my own well being and the well being of my family, especially my kids. I hide it well within the illusion of multitasking.
So, my third major transformation was quitting my job. I left an environment that was not a good fit for my core values, the way that I see medicine, and the way I see my vocation in medicine. I’m still a doctor. I started doing advocacy in a way that will create a positive impact without draining me. It's very hard to advocate from the inside, and yet that's what I did.
Through that transformation I transformed myself into a writer, and published my first book.
I continue being a doctor and seeing patients. That's part of who I am, it's in my heart, and brings me joy.
No fear for me means following my heart - doing things the way that works best for me and my family.”
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If you know it’s time for a change or you are facing a major transition in your life, you won’t want to miss this conversation with my guest “Dr. Z” (Miriam Zylberglait).
Find out how you can establish healthy boundaries so you can enjoy a career, family, and better health.
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/linda-vettrus-nichols/message
𝗥𝗼𝗯 𝗣𝗮𝗿𝗱𝗶: There is a difference between happiness and joy, if you start to really unpack it. Happiness is derived by something. You get a promotion, you're happy. You get a new car, you're happy until the smell goes away and then it's just a car. These things create this feeling of happiness, but it's fleeting. Joy is this beautiful contentment for your life, regardless of what's going on. Joy is our natural state. Children are joyful. They are curious and walk around with a great big smile on their face. Their eyes sparkle at the wonder of it all.
Happiness only earns you moments of fake joy.
The issue with joy is that we might armor up for fear of losing it.
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If you are wondering how happiness only earns you fake joy, you won't want to miss this conversation with my guest Robert Pardi.
Find out how joy opens up a whole new world of possibilities that you can put into action.
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/linda-vettrus-nichols/message
𝗥𝗼𝗯 𝗣𝗮𝗿𝗱𝗶: “At a very young age and because of the situation with my dad, I realized that I could either live in fear or I could focus on the reality of what's under my control and what I could do about my situation. I now have a really interesting relationship with fear. If you tell me not to walk down the street, because it's dangerous, I'm probably gonna go down that street to check it out for myself.
I'm a big acronym person and I have an acronym called TEA. Have a cup of tea every day, which means think about your Thoughts, Efforts, and Actions throughout your day.
Those are the three things that are under our control.
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If you are looking for the antidote to fear, you won't want to miss this conversation with my guest Robert Pardi.
Find out how ‘what is within your control’ opens up a whole new world of possibilities that you can put into action.
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/linda-vettrus-nichols/message
𝗥𝗼𝗯 𝗣𝗮𝗿𝗱𝗶: “The short version of my story is that I was married to an amazing woman, who was then diagnosed with ‘late stage’ breast cancer, right before her 31st birthday. We were at the height of our ‘everything’. I was given a job in the United Arab Emirates, which was unheard of for someone my age, and she was in a MD, PhD program. So, that diagnosis threw us a curveball. For the next 11 years, she journeyed with metastatic breast cancer and even became a doctor. I wasn't her caregiver. She was able to be very autonomous.
After she passed away and I looked at my life, I realized I wasn't feeling comfortable in finance and living in Dubai. When I look back and really think about it, I was her coach. I helped her achieve her goals, what I now call Possibility in Action™.
That's actually what I missed about the Robert that died with her.
I thought about the wonderful tools I learned from the loss itself. What if I shared the benefits of my story with others? That’s when I went through a program to become a Life Coach.
I finally got to a point to fulfill a dream of mine, which was to live in Italy and host personal growth retreats. They started out as hiking retreats and have evolved into being experiential.
Building a community of people, who will then create a positive ripple effect in the world is my new venture.”
*
If you are feeling out of alignment, you won't want to miss this conversation with my guest Robert Pardi.
Find out how following your heart opens up a whole new world of possibilities that you can put into action.
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/linda-vettrus-nichols/message
𝗥𝗼𝗯 𝗣𝗮𝗿𝗱𝗶: “The short version of my story is that I was married to an amazing woman, who was then diagnosed with ‘late stage’ breast cancer, right before her 31st birthday. We were at the height of our ‘everything’. I was given a job in the United Arab Emirates, which was unheard of for someone my age, and she was in a MD, PhD program. So, that diagnosis threw us a curveball. For the next 11 years, she journeyed with metastatic breast cancer and even became a doctor. I wasn't her caregiver. She was able to be very autonomous.
After she passed away and I looked at my life, I realized I wasn't feeling comfortable in finance and living in Dubai. When I look back and really think about it, I was her coach. I helped her achieve her goals, what I now call Possibility in Action™.
That's actually what I missed about the Robert that died with her.
I thought about the wonderful tools I learned from the loss itself. What if I shared the benefits of my story with others? That’s when I went through a program to become a Life Coach.
I finally got to a point to fulfill a dream of mine, which was to live in Italy and host personal growth retreats. They started out as hiking retreats and have evolved into being experiential.
Building a community of people, who will then create a positive ripple effect in the world is my new venture.”
*
If you are feeling out of alignment, you won't want to miss this conversation with my guest Robert Pardi.
Find out how following your heart opens up a whole new world of possibilities that you can put into action.
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/linda-vettrus-nichols/message
𝗗𝗮𝗹𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝗥𝗼𝘀𝗲-𝗠𝗰𝗦𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗻𝘆: “We enter this world because people cared enough to be together to create us. Caring is what gives us an environment of safety and trust for exploration. I show my children that I care about their thoughts and feelings. That I care about them just being here. This has given them a sense of safety and an environment in which to flourish. I love watching them evolve and grow through challenges. I learn so much by watching them and having the freedom to muddle through.
Leading by example is a really big value of mine. We are our children's first teachers and they observe everything we do. So it's not just the words that we use or choose to use, they pick up on our energy and how we interact with them, ourselves, and others. That puts a huge pressure on parents. I believe we put too much pressure on ourselves to be these amazing parents. We come into this role without having a lot of training.
My children keep me honest and they keep me on my toes. I am blessed to have two boys, twelve and fourteen, who still want to share and interact in conversations with me. They come to me about the thoughts that they've gotten from interacting with the world.
My wish for the world is for people to see that each person is a human, not a race, culture, or gender.”
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/linda-vettrus-nichols/message
𝗗𝗮𝗹𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝗥𝗼𝘀𝗲-𝗠𝗰𝗦𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗻𝘆: “Gratitude gets me through everything. I've gone through some pretty tough times in my life. I know we all have our own backstories. Finding things that I'm grateful for helps to strengthen my resilience. It doesn't take away the problems. We will always face challenges, problems, losses, and heartaches. All of those things are part of being human.
Gratitude strengthens my resilience. It's part of my mental fitness and allows me to lean into whatever is happening. The ‘leaning’ takes longer with bigger events. But with persistence, it actually pays off. It always ends and I always feel I come through it a bit mentally stronger, which means I am becoming more resilient.
We go through stages as we face a hurdle in life. You could probably list at least ten stages. They go along a dotted line. Our slumps go down below the line and gratitude brings us above the line. As we build our resistance through gratitude, slumps aren't as low. We start to go through those stages with greater speed and more peace.
Gratitude is accessible for anyone. You may need guidance to learn how to start practicing it.
You can use that toolset for the rest of your life.”
𝗗𝗮𝗹𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝗥𝗼𝘀𝗲-𝗠𝗰𝗦𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗻𝘆: “For me, respect comes from respecting each other. A person doesn't need to think the same way that I do. I don't even need to necessarily understand someone else's thought pattern or where they are coming from. If I acknowledge the fact that it is real for them, then I am showing respect. I've always had an interest in understanding how humanity works. We've got a really evolved complex brain that can achieve so much.
We tend to be so rough on ourselves.
We are our worst critics and pious judges.
Knowing that 'I am okay the way I am’ is a very important fact to believe and comprehend.”
𝗗𝗮𝗹𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝗥𝗼𝘀𝗲-𝗠𝗰𝗦𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗻𝘆: "I've been undertaking personal development and exploration for as long as I can remember. I felt a bit isolated, lonely, and misunderstood as I was growing up finding my place in the world. I also went through some experiences where I felt a bit letdown by the people around me. I decided to only trust in myself. Looking back, I can understand the decisions my younger self made like too much drinking in my twenties.
Over the years, I started to grow in understanding and I realized that bringing trust back into my life would be valuable. In order to do that I needed to learn to forgive others and myself.
My identical twin and I were compared all of our lives, and we are both very independent people.
We grew up in a very caring and loving family. My twin and I are the youngest of five children. When it came to ballet, we were compared to our eldest sister who did well in ballet. Once we were old enough to enroll, the teacher skipped us a year ahead, just because our sister was so good. Crazy little things like that kept adding up. One day a relative told me that I had gotten the brains and my sister had gotten the looks. That was the tipping point for me. Even though it was said from a place of love, it solidified how I was feeling about being so socially awkward at school and feeling like I didn't fit in. I felt as though I wasn’t being seen.
I definitely used it as a lesson when I became a mother. My boys are very independent and have very different personalities. When I see my youngest with comparisons about his abilities to his oldest brother, I help him to focus on the things where they actually have different strengths or are equally as good as each other.
I started off as a dental assistant and I did that for a number of years, then realized there weren't advancement opportunities. I couldn't see myself being that role for the rest of my life. So, I left and eventually found my way into a corporate banking career. I faced some real interesting challenges against really strong personalities and at the same time, I had a huge amount of support from others. I've had more support than challenges.
In that role, I had been known as a guru as an expert. People reached out to me, I had all this history and its knowledge. I was there to help solve complex problems. Now, I wasn't in that environment. I was out on my own. So who was Dalice? That was a really interesting experience to go through where I had to grieve, what I thought I was losing. At the end of that, I realized I actually wasn't losing anything. I was that person today as well. I didn't need to be in that environment to have those skills. I just wasn't using the skills that had shown up in that environment, due to the nature of the roles I was doing. So yeah, that was a really interesting awakening process I went through over a few months.
I am now an Ambassador of Gratitude and I lead people through Gratitude challenges and workshops.”
𝗗𝗶𝗻𝗼 𝗖𝗮𝗿𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗮: “Be love means being free to be who you are. For this reason, you also allow others to be who they are. So ‘be love’ is about acceptance. It's allowing everybody to express and feel the way they feel, and do whatever they have to do. It's a much happier life.
Being connected with the whole and being happy… I experienced that freedom the moment I exhausted all my illusions. I was totally connected with everything and yet no one was really connecting with me.
Nobody recognized me anymore, so they struggled to reconnect.
For a couple of years after that, I felt I had lost the plot.”
If you are feeling out of alignment, you won't want to miss this conversation with my guest Dino Carella.
Find out how following your heart opens up a whole new world of possibilities.
𝗗𝗶𝗻𝗼 𝗖𝗮𝗿𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗮: “Unconsciously or not… everybody wants to land on that feeling of love… especially self-love. We are out of alignment when we aren't aware of our self-love. The moment we clear out all the noise, all the things we believe about ourselves, all the nonsense… having an opinion about everything and everybody… we step into acceptance from a place of love. And we see what we did to ourselves and others.
When this happens, we are liberated from any concept or belief system, and we are no longer the ‘fix it’ guy.
People are fragile. So it is the denial of that reality that makes us muscle up and say, “Look at what a strong person I am”.
Trust is something I found later in life because initially, I wasn't trusting at all. I came from a background where a guy needed to prove how good he was. I ended up mistrusting everybody. I wouldn’t open up with anyone. I kept everything inside, because the moment I would open up, it felt like I was giving someone the power to use my vulnerability against me. So I was really not trusting anybody, because I wasn't trusting myself.
When we accept who we are, there is no drama. You go through stuff and do the best you can.
Whatever flows through you and whatever comes to you, you are there to respond in the best way you can and however you can. You will be learning and also helping somebody watching you to grow.”
If you are feeling out of alignment, you won't want to miss this conversation with my guest Dino Carella.
Find out how following your heart opens up a whole new world of possibilities.
𝗗𝗶𝗻𝗼 𝗖𝗮𝗿𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗮: “When you accept yourself, you feel free to express yourself. Keeping yourself curious brings about the beautiful discovery of you. Understand that whatever is flowing from you, that's your nature. Express it, be yourself. Free expression comes when you stop putting ideas on what you should express to the world. Otherwise, you're gonna trap yourself again into something that you created artificially in order to be liked.
You might be making money or becoming a successful person in a corporation, if you don’t express who you really are, you will feel conflicted inside, which is not full expression.”
If you are feeling out of alignment, you won't want to miss this conversation with my guest Dino Carella.
Find out how following your heart opens up a whole new world of possibilities.
𝗗𝗶𝗻𝗼 𝗖𝗮𝗿𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗮: “I grew up along the sea in Rome. There were plenty of boys playing in the streets. We enjoyed football. Fights were part of the adventure as well. I loved hanging out at the boat landing and I started working as a boatman when I was a young teen.
School was frustrating for me because the things I was being taught didn’t feel like they really applied. I felt misplaced. In Italy, there is the obligation to do military service after high school so I did my military service as a policeman. As soon as I finished the police work, I went to London to seek out a music career and stayed there for two years.
When I was younger, I had this vision of a red skin running on a red road in front of the sun. I didn't know anything about Indians in terms of their ritual or the meaning of the red road. I started to play a song and the lyrics were of this guy that was running saying, "Don't give up, keep on running, don't give up". My mother heard the song, she doesn't speak English, and I was singing it in English. She said, "What are you singing about? It's nice music. When I explained it to her she said, "Oh, your grandfather was breast fed by an Indian. So, I longed to go to America and visit the Indian reservations. I was so curious about that connection.
I never did have a music career. I spent 30 years in corporations and I had my share of success. When I lost my six figure job, I was offered other six figure jobs and you know what? I gratefully declined all offers. I decided that I wasn’t going to sacrifice my peace of mind for another job that didn’t allow me to do what I feel aligned to do. I decided to leave Italy and travel through the Indian reservations of Arizona, Utah, Wyoming, and South Dakota.
In my book, “The Way of the Wind”, which somewhat mirrors my life and midlife crisis. A corporate manager named Ostro finds himself on the verge of a nervous breakdown. He loses his job and embarks on the journey of a lifetime, crossing the Indian Reservations of America, his mother's homeland, hoping to find the connection with the spirit of his ancestors who had spoken to him as a boy. With the help of an Indian spiritual guide and a clairvoyant, he experiences the human dimension that transcends the visible and binds him to infinity."
If you are feeling out of alignment, you won't want to miss this conversation with my guest Dino Carella.
Find out how following your heart opens up a whole world of possibilities.
𝗠𝗶𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗲𝗹 𝗣𝗮𝗱𝘂𝗿𝗮𝗻𝗼: “When I visualize the path of one's journey, I visualize a zigzaggy road that goes up hills, down hills, around mountains, and through 7000 foot tall ant hills. There is no linear path, there is no easy way, there are no shortcuts. It's a one day at a time journey, one step at a time some days for sure. Just crawl or roll forward.
Pain and joy are part of the journey. We don't even realize how directly connected they are.
When my father recently died, I was really worried that I was going to go into a stagnant state. I was actually extremely self-aware of where I was emotionally everyday. I stuck to my journaling and meditation, even though it wasn't exactly what I normally did. I had self-compassion. I understood where I was at and I allowed it to be whatever it was, but I didn't give up the routine. I gave myself space to process. Are we ever over grief? I don't think so, I am through the initial wave. There’s always more.”
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If you are choosing to expand your life, you won't want to miss this conversation with my guest Michael Padurano.
Find out how pain and joy are connected as part of your journey through life.
𝗠𝗶𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗲𝗹 𝗣𝗮𝗱𝘂𝗿𝗮𝗻𝗼: “Knowing that I am whole and complete on my own is not what societal norms tell me. I'm a solo parent of three and I'm a male. Most people would say, "You can't raise your kids on your own, especially two girls. I sit back, and I look at what I was programmed to believe. In reality, my kids need me. No one else would raise my kids with as much love, acceptance, and understanding as me. Through them, I am understanding myself better than I was ever able to do on my own. When I'm at that whole and complete feeling, which is fleeting at times, I am at peace.
I spent my whole life not living like that. So now I choose not to live that way.”
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If you are choosing to feel whole and complete, you won't want to miss this conversation with my guest Michael Padurano.
Find out how to grow and evolve through your kids.
𝗠𝗶𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗲𝗹 𝗣𝗮𝗱𝘂𝗿𝗮𝗻𝗼: “The key to my life today is self-awareness. Paying attention to my own patterns and behaviors while inspiring others to do the same. Living in my truth and sharing from my soul. I don't believe in a heart space, I go straight to the soul space.
Self-awareness is such a core foundation of everything I am as a full being. I hid in the dark for so long, mostly from myself. I definitely wasn't fooling anyone else. After turning that switch on, it's something I never want to shut off ever again because it keeps me in check.
One of my core values is perpetual, continuous growth. I love daily evolution and learning new lessons. Learning and growing through the pain. Self-awareness is about patterns of behavior, actions, and the programming of how I react to the world.
Self-understanding is about knowing my own core values, not the values that were imposed upon me. Understanding myself at a deep level empowers me to walk away from anything or anyone.
Through self-love, I have learned to stand on my own and not need or want for anyone or anything.”
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If you are choosing daily evolution, you won't want to miss this conversation with my guest Michael Padurano.
Find out how to find the answers within.
𝗠𝗶𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗲𝗹 𝗣𝗮𝗱𝘂𝗿𝗮𝗻𝗼: “I was adopted at birth. My adoptive mother abused me physically for the first 9 years of my life and emotionally for a total of 14 years. I had multiple 'near death experiences’ over 15 of them to date. Looking back over the course of my life, my first 'near death experience’ happened when I was about three-and-a-half. I came back 100% spiritually awake and in touch with all the clairs. In other words my psychic senses, the ones that we are born with. Many of us lose touch with those, which is also known as falling asleep to our spiritual connections and abilities.
Clairvoyance - detect psychic information via sight
Clairgustance - detect psychic information via taste
Clairsalience - detect psychic information via smell
Clairaudience - detect psychic information via hearing
Claircognizance - detect psychic information via insight (knowing)
Clairsentience - detect psychic information via the body
Clairempathy - detect psychic information via emotion
Clairtangency - detect psychic information via the hands
I didn't feel comfortable being me and I started to rebel because it was the only way I knew how to react. I started drinking at age 9 and doing hardcore drugs by age 12. I got sober at 27 and I've been sober ever since. I've been through many horrible relationships trying to replace one bad dynamic after another and a lot of self-education because I got thrown out of 2 high schools and never graduated.
I made my first million dollars by age 21.
I built many businesses, like over 24 for sure. That was definitely one of my escapisms”
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If you are choosing to enjoy the journey of your life, you won't want to miss this conversation with my guest Michael Padurano.
Find out how to be comfortable being yourself.
𝗗𝗿. 𝗕𝗿𝗶𝗮𝗻 𝗚𝗿𝗼𝘀𝘀𝗺𝗮𝗻, 𝗣𝗵𝗗: “Laughter breaks tension. We all do silly, crazy things. When we laugh, we get a reset because it increases happy chemicals that flow through our brain. Even a fake smile can have a positive impact on our mood.
If you knock something over you can laugh or get angry. It’s your choice. Laughing changes the focus and gets us into action. “Clean up crew, aisle seven!”
As I was dressing up for this interview, I put my tie on backwards and said to my wife, “How does this look?” She looked at me like I was nuts and said, “You have it on backwards!” I said, ‘Good. You were paying attention!’
I remember eating in the school cafeteria and my friend started to eat a Dorito chip. We all know how to bite into a chip. He leaned forward to take a bite and a corner of the chip hit his front tooth. Well, it didn't just break. It shattered into a million pieces that went everywhere! I still burst out laughing thinking about that scene. What are the odds? It was just so crazy.
My friend was laughing as well.
It’s easy to laugh at others and important to only laugh with them. That’s important for all of us to remember. It’s especially important for me to remember when I am coaching, doing business training, or during a therapy session.
So remember to laugh with yourself, with others, and with crazy.”
𝗗𝗿. 𝗕𝗿𝗶𝗮𝗻 𝗚𝗿𝗼𝘀𝘀𝗺𝗮𝗻, 𝗣𝗵𝗗: “I did my postdoctoral training in Rockville, Maryland. It was in a specialty practice in the DC Triangle working with underachieving kids. The parents were all high achievers. Their kids tested well at school and yet were bringing home D's and F's.
Dealing with assertive and at times aggressive parents is how I really honed my skills for connecting with others. This taught me that it is the core of how we feel about ourselves, our self-confidence and our self-esteem, that governs how we will respond to others.
This is what propelled me into a career based around optimism and motivation.
My first job after grad school was working for a Children's Clinic in Miami, Florida. I specialized in Children and Adolescents with learning challenges.
At several points in my career I worked in prisons, not a lot of positivity going on there. I did my best to make it fun and hip. I encouraged my staff to get enjoyment out of their day.
I also worked for a seminar company and got to travel to every state in the US, and did training in big and even small cities. I've seen the poorest of the poor and the richest of the rich.
I honed my skills so I could do my best relating to everybody.
You know what I found out?
People are good. There's just a small percentage who are off the rails.”
𝗗𝗿. 𝗕𝗿𝗶𝗮𝗻 𝗚𝗿𝗼𝘀𝘀𝗺𝗮𝗻, 𝗣𝗵𝗗: “Optimism isn’t about waking up all happy and excited for the day. That’s not always something you can control. What you can control is writing down a plan. Rather than entering it on your computer, write it out on paper. There's a difference neurologically when we write things down. So write out the steps of your plan and put them on your desk, your refrigerator, your bedpost, etc. and get it done. Take action and make it happen. You can also set up timers and reminders on your phone or computer. When you take the time to plan, your whole outlook changes. You feel better. Your whole body feels different.
By the time I was an adult, I had become an expert in procrastination. It wasn’t as if I had put potholes in front of myself, it was more like giant boulders. Over time I learned to get up in the morning and do the stuff I didn't want to do.
I now help people break their procrastinate cycle.
When you plan and follow the steps, it naturally releases negativity. Connect your plan with a more positive outlook and you will be able to move forward faster.”
𝗗𝗿. 𝗕𝗿𝗶𝗮𝗻 𝗚𝗿𝗼𝘀𝘀𝗺𝗮𝗻, 𝗣𝗵𝗗: “I started out in a great family with a middle class upbringing. Thank God I didn't ‘want for anything’. When I was ten, I got diagnosed with a neuromuscular disorder. So, I learned early on what it's like to be different. My disorder couldn't be seen. It was called Myasthenia Gravis. For me that meant fatigue of the muscles and droopy eyelids.
All of my symptoms disappeared by the time I was eighteen.
As far as vocation went, if we didn't think we wanted to take over our dad's business the rule in our family was education, education, education. My father owned a pleating and embroidery factory. I thought I was going to be president of that company, until I worked there every summer.
Educationally speaking, I wasn’t looking at a bright future. I was getting F's in math and in my family, F's were unacceptable. It wasn't that I couldn't learn, I just couldn't concentrate in a large public school environment. My friend and next door neighbor suggested I go to his private school. My parents talked to his parents and I ended up going there ninth through twelfth grade. It was exactly what I needed.
I continued my education and ended up with a PhD in Psychology.
When I was sixteen I joined a charity organization, the Myasthenia Gravis Foundation. It's a subgroup of the Muscular Dystrophy Association. I was asked to speak in front of 1200 people to help raise money for research.
I was nervous and scared.
It was an excellent experience that taught me I could be a public speaker.”
𝗖𝗮𝗿𝗹𝗮 𝗛𝗼𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗱: “I really value connection. As an entrepreneur it's important to remember that your friends and family are not your customers. So, expecting them to understand your business is kind of an unrealistic expectation. If they asked about your business, keep it light. Those who really want to dig in will ask more questions. Be less concerned about your business and more concerned about developing relationships with everyone.
Life goes by quickly, hang onto your relationship and develop lasting ones.
Another thing to remember is that waiting for the right time doesn’t exist.
I'll do this when...
I'll start a business when my kids are grown.
I'll start writing a book when I retire.
Start today, even if you only have a few minutes here and there. Make a quick phone call, send a quick note, write a paragraph for your book, etc.
It all goes by so quickly that if you wait, you're going to be waiting forever.”
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If you are choosing to create your dream life, you won't want to miss this conversation with my guest Carla Howard.
Find out how to look for and overcome self-limiting beliefs, take small steps, and open the door to creating your own freedom.
𝗖𝗮𝗿𝗹𝗮 𝗛𝗼𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗱: “I love the feel of the statement “you have everything” because so many people hesitate when it comes to really building their dream life, they think they need more of something before they can start. It might be more experience, connections, another certification, a degree, or more time in their craft to develop a talent or a skill. They actually have everything they need right now.
There are hidden talents we may not recognize in ourselves.
Whatever comes easy and natural to us, we often forget that it's not easy and natural for other people.”
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If you are choosing to unite in sisterhood and create your dream life, you won't want to miss this conversation with my guest Carla Howard.
Find out how to look for and overcome self-limiting beliefs, take small steps, and open the door to creating your own freedom.
𝗖𝗮𝗿𝗹𝗮 𝗛𝗼𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗱: “My transition to paid speaking gigs was tough. I made so many mistakes along the way and I left so much value on the table. After making all of those mistakes, I now have a package that converts. I know how to reach the event organizers and get paid.
People started asking me how I did that?
Initially, I didn’t even know how much to charge. I asked for $200. A particular event organizer was very kind and set me straight. I ended up putting my Get Paid From the STAGE!!! course together because another woman said, “Carla, if you will put a program together to teach people how to transition to highly paid speaking engagements, I will pay for it. Other people will pay for it, please do this, and so I did.
I launched and filled that program in January of this year. It sold out and I’m offering it again.
During that program I thought, 'I'm asking these folks to apply for speaking gigs. I need to do it too’. So I applied for like five or six engagements. The next week, I got an email from the event organizer, who was interested in my talk. She asked for the price. I said, $9,000 plus travel, she sent me a contract, and I booked the gig.
I'm doing that speaking engagement in a couple of weeks. So, it works. The process works.”
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If you are choosing to unite in sisterhood and create your dream life, you won't want to miss this conversation with my guest Carla Howard.
Find out how to look for and overcome self-limiting beliefs, take small steps, and open the door to creating your own freedom.
𝗖𝗮𝗿𝗹𝗮 𝗛𝗼𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗱: “My mom and dad raised my sister and I to know that whatever dream we had, we could achieve it. I graduated high school in 1980 and went into the corporate world. I had no idea there was this perception that women couldn't do whatever they wanted. It was a shock because there was never any dream I had that I thought for one minute I couldn't achieve. I didn't know there was gender inequality. I didn't know there was a pay gap and that was such a gift.
I didn't have those self-limiting beliefs around what I could achieve.
I noticed that there were so many women being held back by what they believed they could or couldn't do. I found myself coaching them around the fact that they could.
I also let them know that it takes small steps every day in order to create your dream life.”
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If you are choosing to unite in sisterhood and create your dream life, you won't want to miss this conversation with my guest Carla Howard.
Find out how to look for and overcome self-limiting beliefs, take small steps, and open the door to creating your own freedom.
Niti Nadarajah is a great storyteller. I love reading her posts on LinkedIn. In this interview, Niti explains how this whole idea of using story developed. The idea came to her when she was asked to do a presentation about Diversity and Inclusion. She decided to talk about the power of storytelling in creating inclusive environments.
Niti also talked about how our lived experiences inform our opinions, perspectives, and views. Sharing them through story creates connection and a way to help others awaken and evolve.
“I'm gonna share what I know. I can't know anything else with certainty. What I can know is my experience.” ~Niti Nadarajah
Have a listen to learn more about Niti's teachings and story of transformation!
𝗡𝗶𝘁𝗶 𝗡𝗮𝗱𝗮𝗿𝗮𝗷𝗮𝗵: “I think listening is one of the most underrated skills in the world. We don't ‘listen to listen’. We're often in our heads, we listen to respond, we listen to react. The most common response that we have as human beings is to jump in, interrupt, and not even wait for the other person to take a breath.
Subconsciously, we listen to connect with our own story or to segue way into some other topic.
We often feel responsible for keeping the conversation going. When I listen to listen, I tell myself 'I'm just going to be here and empty my mind out of all of my stuff. My purpose ‘in this moment’ is to just be here. I don't have anything to say, unless this person invites me to say something'.
Listening is so important. I can remember the times when I felt deeply connected. Being vulnerable was easy. Those were the moments where people had been able to really listen.
Silence is golden and unfortunately as a listener, we often fill in the silence because it makes us uncomfortable.”
Have a listen to learn more about Niti's teachings and story of transformation!
𝗡𝗶𝘁𝗶 𝗡𝗮𝗱𝗮𝗿𝗮𝗷𝗮𝗵: “There’s a warmth and a feeling of generosity when I think about kindness. For me it's about being there for another person and allowing myself to really listen and to just be with this person. To give openly and freely.
Reflecting on having my second miscarriage, a co-worker said, “Are you okay? You don’t seem like yourself”. The kindness in that moment was like an invitation to allow myself the freedom to go there and to share.
On the flip side, rather than ignoring what I might be sensing is happening with another person, I'm now going to step in and ask a question to see if in some way, I can help this person. By helping I don't mean offering solutions or remedies, because that's not compassion. It's sympathy and not empathy.”
Have a listen to learn more about Niti's teachings and story of transformation!
𝗡𝗶𝘁𝗶 𝗡𝗮𝗱𝗮𝗿𝗮𝗷𝗮𝗵: “The biggest transformation for me has been over the last couple of years. It started very strangely. There wasn't an aim to sort of transform or to be anyone different. COVID hit when I was supposed to return to the office from parental leave with my second child. All of a sudden, I was working from home. I had been in my own bubble. I felt quite isolated at the time. I thought, how do I connect with people now that I'm out in the world, but I'm not out in the world. I'm connecting, but I'm not connecting. It was like, ‘what do I do for an outlet?’ I had previously dabbled a little bit in writing on LinkedIn.
'I thought, you know what? I'm just gonna use this as a way to communicate with people I know.’
I actually wasn't even thinking of it as posting on social media.
I just thought, ‘Okay, my colleagues, friends, and everyone are all on here. So I’ll use this platform to share what's going on for me, where I am, and some of the challenges that I’m facing during COVID working and having a 6 year old home as well’.
The more I wrote the more I reflected, and I slowly started living life differently. I became very aware of what was going on around me.
I remember watching my daughter interact with her baby brother, who at the time was about a year old. I had this out of body experience where I was sort of watching them, but not as me, kind of from somewhere else. It was like I was an alien watching this scene from a metaphysical position. This matched up with what I’d been learning about in an NLP (Neurolinguistic Programming) course I was taking.
That sort of thing kept happening, and I thought 'this is amazing. I love it! I need to lean into this more’ and as I did my awareness kept growing.”
Have a listen to learn more about Niti’s story of transformation!
𝗥𝗶𝘀𝗵𝗮𝗱 𝗔𝗵𝗺𝗲𝗱: “As humans, the one thing that we crave is to be loved. The definition of love is connection. I found that out much later in life. The definition of not being loved is not feeling connected. Love is a very important topic for me. I studied the work of Eric Fromm, Carl Jung, and Alfred Adler. There's so much to learn from these guys. I wish I'd found this information sooner. With so many relationships crumbling right now, I ended up creating a course I call Relationships Beyond Ego.
The ego mind says, 'I'm different to you'.
That feeling of knowing the ‘oneness of everything and everyone’ is spoken about as love.”
Have a listen to learn more about Rishad's teachings and story of transformation!
𝗥𝗶𝘀𝗵𝗮𝗱 𝗔𝗵𝗺𝗲𝗱: “Our life is full of stories: the story we tell ourselves, the story we tell ourselves about others, and the stories other people tell about us and our life... it's all a lie. It's all been constructed within a certain dialogue of perception.
We perceive with our senses.
Most people are familiar with the five senses - Sight, Hearing, Smell, Taste, and Touch. The Vedas, texts that constitute the oldest layer of Sanskrit literature and the oldest scriptures of Hinduism, include Thinking as one of our senses.
If we look at reality with all the new scientific measurements, there is a spectrum of light that we cannot see and sounds we cannot hear. In perceiving the world through our senses, we're not seeing reality for what it is.
I love what Eckhart Tolle talks about - how our life situation is not our life, we are life. Our life situation is something constructed in our minds. It's a lie that we tell ourselves and we can change that as well.
You can change the programming that comes from your conditioning and your environment.”
Have a listen to learn more about Rishad's teachings and story of transformation!
𝗥𝗶𝘀𝗵𝗮𝗱 𝗔𝗵𝗺𝗲𝗱: “When my clients say, 'I need a change of scenery'. I say, 'No, you need a new pair of eyes’. From birth, we are conditioned to see the world a certain way. Rather than blaming our parents, our society, or our past, we get to look at how we measure success.
Carl Jung says it so beautifully, ‘What you see wrong in the world is wrong with yourself’. I also love Dr. Wayne Dyer’s quote, ‘We don't see things as they are, we see things as we are’.
Jung talks about the shadow as being the part of you that lurks in the background, pretending not to be part of you. The Japanese say that we wear three masks. One mask for the world, another mask for ourselves, and then there's the mask that we actually are.
What we need to do is go beyond the masks to identify and integrate everything we are. Then love and accept it all. It's not a blame game.”
Have a listen to learn more about Rishad's teachings and story of transformation!
𝗥𝗶𝘀𝗵𝗮𝗱 𝗔𝗵𝗺𝗲𝗱 comes from a background dominantly focused on success, as it's been defined and measured by mainstream society: how much money you have, what car you drive, how pretty your wife or your husband is, etc.
Here’s what he had to say during this interview. “After I worked my way up the corporate ladder, I became an entrepreneur and started many businesses. Always chasing after the goal of great achievement.
I slowly became bitter, resentful, and frustrated. That frustration built and my health started to deteriorate. My relationships were collapsing. It was the great disdain of life. I held resentment for everyone, including those that I apparently loved. In my mind, I wasn't getting to where I was supposed to be, and I didn’t even know where that was. All I knew was that I wasn't there.”
Have a listen to learn more about Rishad's story of transformation!
𝗚𝗮𝗿𝗿𝗶𝘀𝗼𝗻 𝗖𝗼𝗵𝗲𝗻: “Everything is love. All else is a misunderstanding. We are either moving towards love or we are in a response. That response is feeling disconnected from love and disconnected from the original mother. When we come into the world we are born through our mother. Then at some point we are 𝘀𝗲𝗽𝗮𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱 from our mother or 𝙨𝙚𝙥𝙖𝙧𝙖𝙩𝙚 from our mother. Those two things can happen on a lot of different levels.
This process can create trauma, pain, and confusion. People spend their entire lives trying to make up or compensate. It can show up in some pretty horrendous ways. You can see it in the choices world leaders are making right now.
Ultimately, everything is love.
Even if it's an inverted version of love, acting out in destructive ways.”
Have a listen to learn more from Garrison!
𝗚𝗮𝗿𝗿𝗶𝘀𝗼𝗻 𝗖𝗼𝗵𝗲𝗻: “Grace comes when we learn to surrender to what is happening from a place of Presence, Appreciation, and Integrity. I basically see it as having three levels.
The first level is Presence - Am I present with myself and what's happening around me?
The second level is Appreciation - How am I responding?
The third level is Integrity - Can I bring my integrity to it?
What I find is that when we bring those three elements together it creates a way of being in the world, where we are flowing with our truth and being empowered.
Beauty, magic, and miracles unfold from that place.”
Have a listen and enjoy more teachings from Garrison!
𝗚𝗮𝗿𝗿𝗶𝘀𝗼𝗻 𝗖𝗼𝗵𝗲𝗻: “We are all on our own hero's journey, period. From the time we're born until the time we exit, that is our hero's journey. Many people don't recognize how special and fantastic their journey is. A lot of people I've worked with didn't think their journey was all that special, until I reflected it back to them.”
Have a listen, you won't want to miss this episode!
When I asked Garrison Cohen to share his story of transformation he said, “Where do I begin? Like many kids, I was born.” That was my quick peek into Garrison’s sense of humor. He proceeded to tell me that from very early on, he was AWARE. In other words, unlike the typical human journey, Garrison Cohen STAYED AWAKE. Babies these days are doing the same.
𝗛𝗲𝗿𝗲'𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘁 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝘆: "I was aware that people were not aware, and that was really hard. As a child with no understanding of what was happening, it was very confusing.
My parents and other people around me weren't aware of their own feelings, and yet I was. I would feel everything that they were feeling and then wonder why I felt so terrible.
‘Why do I feel so conflicted? Why do I feel so scared, lost or sad?’
All I knew is that ‘this doesn't feel right’. Eventually, I made it mean that there was something wrong with me.
My one guiding light was a voice that I would hear inside of myself that would say, 'This can't be as good as it gets. Because if it is, it shouldn't feel like this. That was my compass’.
I knew that somehow, I was going to have to figure out a path to where I could say, 'I don't know if this is as good as it gets, but I'm so happy that I don't really care if it gets better.”
Have a listen to learn more about Garrison's story of transformation!
Gratitude comes from connecting with others, especially our children. Recovering workaholic John Chappelear made a conscious decision to notice what really mattered. He began to change his perspective from “How is this going to affect me?” to “How is this going to affect the people around me in a positive way?”
John learned to see what was going on around him, rather than creating turmoil within himself.
His new perspective was to be grateful for all things at all times, not just the good stuff.
Things were no longer good or bad, it was more about wait and see.
If you are looking to decrease stress and take a closer look at the focus of your life, you won't want to miss this conversation.
Find out how to achieve career as well as personal contentment.
The fruits of change can come from what author John Chappelear calls “Gifts of Devastation”.
In his book “The Daily Six” John reveals six concepts everyone can follow for focusing on what really matters. These are the concepts John created to re-engineer his life and renew his connection with the most important people… his family.
This empowered John to create true success and inner satisfaction.
If you are looking to decrease stress and take a closer look at the focus of your life, you won't want to miss this conversation.
Find out how to achieve career as well as personal contentment.
Author John Chappelear says, “Forgiveness is giving up all hope of a better yesterday, meaning 'let it go' because it’s gone.” In this conversation John refers to the Saturday Night Live skit with the advice 'if you drop your keys in hot flowing lava, let them goooooooo’.
John used to deal with his resentment, judgment, and anger by stuffing it all into a bag. Then he’d throw that bag over his shoulder and carry it home at night. At home he would build up more resentment, judgment, and anger then stuff that into his bag. The following morning he'd carry that back to work.
He didn't even notice how much the bag was driving his behavior, which was in turn driving his actions and everything else.
John figured there was a better way to live.
He is the author of "The Daily six".
If you are looking to decrease stress and take a closer look at the focus of your life, you won't want to miss this conversation.
Find out how to achieve career as well as personal contentment.
My guest John Chappelear is an organizational consultant, author and professional keynote speaker with over 30 years experience as an entrepreneur. John’s unique perspective comes from a realized sense of gratitude for all life’s gifts, even the Gifts of Devastation.
For years John's personal mantra was “Everything! All the time! Right Now!” and he was successful by every external standard. He built a multimillion-dollar business, owned luxury homes and cars, and enjoyed all the benefits that lots of cash can buy. His ‘all-consuming quest for more’ ultimately led to a divorce, estrangement from his children, and a crisis of faith in himself and the value of his life. Then, in a bitter twist of fate or what he has come to call his own “Gift of Devastation”, John lost the business that he had worked so relentlessly to build.
Today, as a self-described “Recovering Big Shot”, John has committed himself to the pursuit of success with significance.
If you are looking to decrease stress and take a closer look at the focus of your life, you won't want to miss this conversation.
Find out how to achieve career as well as personal contentment.
At one point in her life, Kristina Wolf went into a deep depression and contemplated suicide. She decided to turn her life around by joining the Navy. Kristina has undergone many personal transformations, often walking in two worlds. She is a modern mystic, spiritual mentor, writer, healer, and mindset empowerment coach who believes it is her divine mission to support spiritually-based women entrepreneurs to quit playing small and overcome any energetic blocks that have hindered them from bringing their gifts of service to the world. Kristina is a student of shamanic healing, energy medicine, and empowerment coaching who inspires her clients to walk their own hero’s journey.
As a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, Mercedes Samudio has a private coaching practice. She has worked with various family units and even children living with mental illness. Mercedes seeks to empower parents to believe that they are already great guides for raising healthy, happy children. She believes that shame proofing your parenting is more about raising humans who understand the journey of being empathetic with themselves. Mercedes is the author of "SHAME PROOF PARENTING: FIND YOUR UNIQUE PARENTING VOICE, FEEL EMPOWERED, AND RAISE WHOLE, HEALTHY CHILDREN".
Tune into this episode if you’d like to get rid of anxiety, raise your standards, and say hello to guilt-free pleasure. Sexuality & Communicaion Coach Steena Marie started her life out as ‘the good girl’ and continues to shed all of the layers of people pleasing and living up to everyone else’s expectations and standards. To break her addiction to constant emotional drama, Steena embraced her sometimes scandalous identity and learned the art of successful relationships and growth-focused communication. She loves sharing her secrets to unapologetic living. Her journey has been finding both parts of herself, the overachiever and the rebel. Steena teaches women how to create amazing relationships that are full of intimacy and free from codependency.
Sexual Embodiment Facilitator Steena Marie came to the realization that sexual issues are communication issues. Steena believes that all behavior is a mirror for understanding our own behavior. As a mom, she realized that power struggles are an illusion… she and her children can be in power together. Steena is the author of "Worship HER" a dynamic book about sexuality and how it expresses WHO you are and what influences the way you connect with others. Steena loves sharing the secrets to unapologetic living, the art of successful relationships, and growth-focused communication with her coaching clients.
The Ugly Duckling story helps us to realize that we may not belong to our original family, and encourages us to find our Soul family where we do belong! The Obscene Goddess is about retrieving our sacred sexuality. Sexual Embodiment Facilitator Steena Marie believes that your sexual issues are communication issues. She also knows the formula for self-sabotage and dealing with OCD. Steena is the author of "TRIGGER PROOF YOUR LIFE: KNOW WHEN TO LEAVE..." her rather unconventional life story of entrepreneurship, motherhood, and dynamic relationships. Steena’s mantra is ‘scrap the pattern… design your own life.
After suffering from medical trauma and initially unknown birth trauma, Dorie Silverman has struggled with anxiety and depression most of her life. She often asks herself this question, “What is the place inside of me where I can find my truth.?” Dorie believes that it is important to marinate in pleasure and then take action. She now works with women over 40 and settles their shit through somatic experiencing, yoga, and spirituality, while bringing pleasure and enjoyment back into their lives. Dorie does this without diving into all of the horrible things that happened to you or the story around them. This episode is full of many new tips and tricks for understanding and shifting anxiety and depression through somatic experiencing. Have a listen so you can better support yourself and others.
In order to find my voice, I always had this constant dread that there's gonna be a repercussion. Surrounding myself with safe people and with my spiritual tribe gave me the strength to pull back from family and gently find my voice. Jennifer Beitz has a similar story. Jennifer also downsized her relationships. As she awakened she recognized how she would let others speak for her out of fear of being rejected. Once she realized the value of expression over impression, impressing others, and then working with a coach, she began to see herself in her own sandbox. She broke the silence, shared her truth, and dove headlong into authenticity. Now Jennifer expresses to others her authentic journey so others don’t have to go through the same pain points.
Join Jennifer Beitz and I for a Jen-U-ine conversation. To be authentic, we get to lead from our hearts. Jennifer shifted into being more authentic, in her late 40s, after watching others share their message on LinkedIn. Even though she didn’t feel ready, even though she didn’t have all of her ducks in a row, she just knew that what was on the other side would be worth it. Jennifer began to recognize that her worth was in her flaws. As she embraced new beliefs about herself, she became more authentic. This allowed others to feel good about themselves and connect with her. Join us to hear more.
It took me a long time before I realized I wasn’t loving myself. Give a listen as Jennifer Beitz and I share our stories. Jennifer was so busy loving everyone else as a wife and mother that she was going in many different directions. Through meditation, Jennifer was able to let go of her people pleasing ways. The more she filled her own cup, the more she was able to give to others without depleting her own energy. Jennifer believes that loving yourself is about connecting with yourself. Join us for this life enhancing conversation.
Part of Jennifer Beitz's authenticity is wanting others to feel that they can be themselves. She does such a beautiful job of edifying others, which puts them in a safe space. People kind of can relax and open up being around Jennifer. She believes that we have the answers within; she originally had found herself in a loop of people pleasing. You’ll enjoy her sweet spirit as you listen to her story.
In the story of LaLoba - The Wolf Woman, author Clarissa Pinkola Estes teaches us about the transformative function of the psyche. She is the author of "Women Who Run with the Wolves". After years of trying life THEIR way, Tania left the expectations of family behind. She was 28 years old and ready to discover who she was and what she wanted to create. Tania believes that our lives are the sum of our choices. Her 2 girls are her inspiration. As The Congruency Coach, Tania empowers her clients to connect with their feelings, renew their beliefs, and make confident, sustainable decisions. I trust that you will enjoy her teachings and the beautiful, empowering way she frames things. Tania talks about being courageous as well as how to treasure your truth and the truth of others.
As a wife and working mom of 3 Jennifer Bronsnick knows the perfect recipe for burnout, sleepless nights, and putting family needs before your own. She believes that what children need most of all is a mother who is full of joy, passion, and wisdom. By taking care of our physical, emotional, and spiritual needs, as well as owning our value, we give our children the best chance of a happy and abundant future. Jennifer is the author of "Thriving Mama 10 Secrets for Healing Your Mind, Body and Spirit After Burnout". Her book includes a complimentary Human Design Reading and Energy Blueprint. Join me as I welcome Jennifer to this podcast episode.
Licensed Clinical Social Worker, Jennifer Bronsnick is a Human Design therapist. I love Human Design and I love what Jennifer is doing in the world. We can’t have World Peace without Inner Peace. Jennifer and I tend to say, “Can’t we all just love one another?” We both received peace and self-acceptance in understanding our own Human Design. Jennifer had experienced panic attacks and didn’t know when enough is enough. HD gave her the reasons why she was seeing the world through a victim mindset and taught her how to embody peacefulness.
In her book "You Are Enough Just Be You: Why? Because I Believe In YOU!" author Suzien Welstead writes, “I just knew I had to run and run I did. It must have been about 11.30 pm when I started panicking. I had never been on my own in the streets at night. I could hear people coming out of the pub, and I froze. Oh gosh, what do I do? I was terrified.” In this book Suzie shares her drama trauma story and transformation from running away from an abusive home as a teen to creating a healthy happy family of her own. Past conditioning can keep us from trusting ourselves because we don’t believe in ourselves. Suzie believes that we all are amazing. She knows first hand how much we struggle until we believe in ourselves. Suzie loves walking, water colours, and spending quality time with her family and friends.
Sexuality Power Coach and author Dieniz Costa wrote the book “LIVING INTO WELLNESS: It’s Your Life Own Your Power” highlighting her life with Fibromyalgia. In this book, Dieniz shares her journey into wellness and how she was able to answer the question: What is wellness for me? The tools she shares have helped her to live a life of wellbeing and move beyond the symptoms of her diagnosis to living a fuller life. Did you know there are over 250 symptoms associated with fibromyalgia. You won’t want to miss this interview because you might just be surprised as to what they are, I know I was even though I had a mild case myself.
Life is not about weight loss. It's about the outcome of the weight loss. Cindy Moore had really low energy most of her life, starting when she was a kid. Cindy never did any sports. She just couldn't seem to get her body moving enough. Cindy spent many years after having kids, just coming home from her job, as a music teacher, and laying on the couch so she could take a nap. That's all she had the energy to do. About three years ago she found a nutrition program, and it really woke her up. She was able to get off the couch and start participating in her kids lives. Now she runs marathons with her husband. Cindy had also been dealing with chronic pain and inflammation. She was able to get completely off of her pain meds as well. Cindy has an inspiring story about not letting life pass you by so have a listen.
We don’t usually procrastinate in doing things that bring us personal value. I love Tania Gerard’s spin on the topic of Procrastination. If you find yourself procrastinating, Tania suggests that you connect with yourself and figure out what you are really needing. She believes that our needs are like puppies or toddlers because they know how to get our attention. Being honest with ourselves, seeing who we are in the moment, and honestly listening to our hearts is the key to seeing that procrastination is not a problem. It’s actually a super power. You won’t want to miss this episode!
Byron Morrison of Peak Performance Coaching and author of the book “Become A Better You” has an amazing story of transformation. Byron was depressed, overweight, and out of shape when his father took ill with cancer. His father is now a cancer survivor and along the way, Byron also survived. He originally had no confidence, didn’t want to leave the house, and doubted himself in everything he did. His decision to make a change in his own life, allowed him to stop ignoring the voice in his head. That self-sabotaging voice that isn’t real and is actually just stories. Being comfortable with being uncomfortable is what holds us back. When we make small changes we start to learn who we really are and have power over change. The world is going to continue to change so we might as well create our own change.
In this crazy chat, Jennifer Beitz listens deeply as I share how I stepped into becoming a Book in 30 Days Coach. Then we switched roles and I got to hear more about her and her story of stepping into entrepreneurship. I believe that the well supported woman is the woman who other women take time to witness. It’s a beautiful process that doesn’t happen as often as it could. Have a listen, I’m sure you’ll get plenty of inspiration from this episode.
After Jennifer Beitz found her voice, she put out the intention to connect with others. Jennifer was holding space for somebody who would help her to tell and share her story. Somebody who was safe to be around, and didn't need anything from her in return. This short snippet is a conversation Jennifer and I had just after recording her Soul message and her personal story of transformation. That interview will also become part of her very first book.
Meet Deanne Welsh, a girl from the sea. Deanne was raised on a missionary ship and traveled the world. Her aunts are voracious readers and told her about the book “Women Who Run with the Wolves” which is my favorite book. In this interview, Deanne talks about creativity and how we are all creative beings. We get so close to breaking through our struggles and then give up. This is an interview of encouragement because we are stronger than we know, surrounded by supportive help, and have everything we need.
Stories are full of archetypal energy: Finding the life that feeds your Soul is about self-perseverance and clear water, the river beneath the river as author Clarissa Pinkola Estes puts it. She is the author of "Women Who Run with the Wolves". Clairssa teaches us that if we do not keep the river beneath the river healthy and allow our creative life to flourish, we will die.
The struggle to tell your story is real. Just ask Andrea Sanchez. I did! Andrea believes that the more you tell your story, the more you open it up for others to tell theirs. When we start seeing the humanness in each other, we become more connected and the world becomes a kinder place. Trust your gut. If your trauma story keeps coming out, reach out for help. Find someone you trust and get your story out or it will go someplace else in your body and cause dis-eases. The best part about sharing our stories is that what we went through can actually help others to shorten their learning curve or avoid disaster altogether.
In this episode, Andrea Sanchez teaches us about asking for help. Her 3 main points are: You are not alone, Someone is listening, and Only the strong ask for help. I asked her if she actually did what she teaches and mentioned that asking for help is difficult for me. Andrea’s response was priceless. She agreed with me that it’s a tough/hard thing to do and that is why she called it out. Obviously we had a good laugh over that one. This was an enjoyable and thought provoking interview so pull up a chair and have a listen.
The word Believe covers Andrea Sanchez’s mantra. If she did tattoos, she’d engrave it on her wrist. Andrea believes in a higher power and how important it is to have something to believe in and opens one up to possibilities. We chatted about my two favorite books “The Art of Possibility” and “Pathways to Possibility”. Possibilities are endless, we get to choose our mindset and then breathe into an unlimited canvas. Andrea shares her super power question: Will I regret it if I don’t do this and take advantage of this opportunity before me. You won’t want to miss this episode.
Meet Andrea Sanchez. She was never allowed to express her own feelings and she was told what to wear, think, and behave. Abuse comes in many forms, including cultural and religious abuse. This created low self-confidence and drew in bullying at school, not to mention plenty of emotional trauma. All of which led Andrea into depression and anxiety. She found her voice once she moved out of her family’s home and started to attend University. Her wounded inner child continued into her adult life as a wife, mother, and even in her career. Not wanting her kids to end up this way she stepped into her power and really figured out Andrea’s spark. So have a listen! Learn how you can introduce yourself and connect with others through your story as you develop your brand.
This is a true Soul message that came to Alexandra Enke during an intense Vipassana Meditation retreat. Alexandra shares that it felt like her whole body was vibrating and there was a lightbulb in her chest. She got the message that we matter and are always loved even if no one else loves us. This experience took away her neediness. Now she can tell herself, “I’m enough and I’m worthy no matter what.” We are love and we came from love. Love is all there is and we can release our pain through love. I know you will enjoy this beautiful conversation.
The first time Alexandra experienced oneness was when she was attending a conference of global citizens. Even with all of the differences, everyone could connect at a deep level. When we open up to others, we CAN connect and feel that oneness. Rather than focusing on what bugs us about another person, we can appreciate our differences and focus on the things that do connect us. Sharing our common truths is another way to find connection. Alexandra shares her concept of No Borders. Have a listen, you won’t want to miss this one!
We come from the light and we have this light that we shine out into the world. What makes it unique and how do we know it’s unique. We are born with our genetic imprint and then we are shaped by our environment and what we study. All of the patterns that go through our life create our uniqueness. Some lights are more covered up from trauma and yet it is there. We can nurture that flame, connect with others, and realize we are the same in that we are all human. Everyone has a story. Alexandra shares a teaching from one of her mentors. Have a listen as we discuss the concept of Unity without Uniformity.
Alexandra grew up in a little village in Eastern Germany with her parents and two younger sisters. The way she would shine her light was to listen to the stories of others, books got her started in this process. At the time of high school graduation she had a sense of purpose and still wasn’t sure of what it was at that time. During her college years she found a group of global citizens. She went all in and became a leader. While attending their international conference, something suddenly opened within her to her bigger purpose. Alex realized she could become anything she wanted to be in this world. There was no turning back.
Dr. Tetyana Azarova has an amazing story of transformation of how she came to understand that love is medicine. In talking with others Dr. Azarova has tapped into just how amazing other people’s stories are as well. Tetyana now looks at life as a learning opportunity and an opening for discovery as well as enjoyment. The concept of love allows her to work on breaking free from her former conditioning. Listen in as we chat about going into action and being open to experience the next step. When we tap into who we really are it allows us to expand our hearts and love for ourselves and others.
How has your own vibration shown up for you in your relationship with life, love, and deity? Why are you on the planet? Daniel Adams shares that one of the answers for him is to radiate love because it is the door to healing. When our senses are flooded we can always count on the warmth of the sun to shift our emotions. Daniel is a music therapist who has sat with hundreds of people in nursing homes and experienced their last days in this world. He has also witnessed their transitions from this life. Give a listen as we explore the fullness of emotional healing.
If what we put out comes back to us, then what would happen if we radiated love? What would we be able to get in touch with at a really deep level? Getting back in touch with who we really are is the first step of going deeper to understand the imprint. This opens the door to create choice. If we can shift our genes, as revealed through Epigenetics, can we shift our thoughts and patterns? Neuroplasticity says we CAN change, choose, and sculpt our experience and experiences. Daniel Adams shares a powerful experience of getting in touch with his ancestors.
Breath is part of creativity. We are the creators of our experience. We are always creating. What we experience on the inside, shows up on the outside. Even our kids and pets will give us plenty of feedback. When we acknowledge and own what we are creating, that is the moment of choice. The waves of energy that we send out always come back to us. In this episode you’ll learn how to be the creator of your own unique experience.
What is creativity, what is ‘generativity’? Daniel Adams discovered that he is hardwired to create babies, even business babies and music babies... like new songs and experiences through music. What are you hardwired for is the real question. Where do you find the answers? Daniel shares how confused he’s been around sexuality and creativity. We are quick to take on labels. You can avoid the labels by tapping into what you are thinking. In this episode Daniel shares how to fully embody your Soul and harness the essence of creativity for yourself and your business.
Author Daniel Adams is one of the most amazing guys I know. He definitely understands how to create words that have never existed before such as ‘presentness’. The best part or rather the fun part is listening to him explain what each word means to him. Daniel spent most of his life wanting to be right and having someone tell him what to do. He had been looking outside of himself for knowledge, permission to succeed, the perfect job or opportunity, and for the perfect story. The further he went and the more he smashed his head against walls and went against universal law, he realized that we really do create our own reality. He now understands how to source from within. Daniel can’t think of anything more awakening than having a family. His POV is Strengthen Your Family & Awaken Your Creativity. Have a listen, you won’t be sorry.
Author Paul Burt and I chat about the book "Women Who Run with the Wolves", by Clarissa Pinkola Estes. We zeroed in on two particular stories: "The Handless Maiden" and "Skeleton Woman". I absolutely love the story of "The Handless Maiden" because it’s a great review of the book and talks about the different stages of initiation that we go through as a woman. That story also shows us the male psyche and how important it is for men to go through their own journey in the underworld. It’s a perfect set up for the story "Skeleton Woman" because that story is about a particular fear that overcomes us, especially men, the fear of falling in love. We also looked at the importance of being able to receive in order to transform ourselves and our lives.
"The Handless Maiden" recovers the Wild Woman initiation rites.
"Skeleton Woman" gives us a glimpse at a mythical relationship and how dead feelings can be revived.
In this episode, Dieniz Costa and I talk about the traumatized child. You don't have to deal with an inner child running your life. You can take that traumatized child and grow that child up. I will share how to muscle test to find out the age of your inner child. Dieniz will share what it meant for her to go through this process with me.
In this episode, my best friend and biz bestie Steena Marie got a kick out of my "wasband's" response to getting punched in the eye when I worked as a Special Ed. teacher in a psychiatric day treatment center. We also chatted about fond memories from childhood that as adults we don't always bring up. It's very cathartic to write a memoir, and I shared my response to stirring up all of that energy. Steena and I also shared stories about freaking out and letting go.
I've been through the era of supermom syndrome, and it didn't work. She's the perfect mother, the model wife, and the most helpful friend - juggling home and career with a constant smile on her face. She's everything to everyone. The worst part is that this woman doesn't even exist. This syndrome sure did and it's back. Now what? Join Jennifer Beitz, Bhavana BP, and I as we discuss how to take back our power.
The best time to start marketing your book is before you write it. Listen in as I give Bhavana a few tips from my perspective as a book in 30 Days Coach. Her memoir, "A DAUGHTER’S FIRST LOVE: DAD - BK PURUSHOTHAMA (BKP) The Man | The Teacher | The Legend" is now out and available on Amazon. Bhavana’s book is a work of art that empowers us to overcome our own barriers in life and brings with it the illuminating opportunity to transform our relationships. There is no greater role model than a father who speaks through his daughter to inspire us all to enjoy deep connection with our own spiritual connection. Join Jennifer Beitz, Bhavana BP, and I as we explore books and more.
In this episode, Jennifer Beitz and I lovingly tease Bhavana BP about the difficulties of her lifestyle. Find out what it’s like living as an adult in India. Teenage Adults, was the joking term, living at home with their parents worrying that their kids will rat them out. ;-)
Jennifer Beitz, Bhavana BP, and I chat about the conditioning of growing up. Jennifer had some great clarifying questions we can ask ourselves. Push back from family, especially our mothers, can lead us to needing some serious therapy. Having deeper discussions with other women helps us with our own clarity and to become more aligned with our own truth.
In discussion #2 Jennifer Beitz, Bhavana BP, and I take a look at how the new generation is rising. People are waking up and taking sides. Are Millennials really demanding? Maybe they grew up in a time where they learned not to tolerate things and know that they have a voice, unlike how we were raised.
In this episode, Jennifer Beitz, Bhavana BP, and I chat about inner resilience throughout the various decades of our lives. I mention my experience through the adventure of being asked to be a contributing author of the compilation book, "Menopause Mavens - Master the Mystery of Menopause". There are some helpful stories and great tips in that book, some of the authors are health coaches.
This is the episode where Steena Marie and I talk about the importance of building a relationship with people, before having a sales conversation. Steena shares great tips on becoming memorable as well as likeable in the minds of others. Have you ever been turned off by someone who reaches out to connect, for example on LinkedIn? As soon as you connect they send you a blurb that gives their title and what they sell.
Marketing is no longer about sales it’s about being of service, it’s about Relationship Marketing. It’s not what you sell, it’s WHO you sell that matters. For centuries retailers sold what the customer ‘needed’ like food, coats, livestock, and so on. Today, most of us can buy what we want in 20 colors so the retailer must change their occasional customers into friends, fans, and most importantly referral sources in order for their business to not only survive but thrive.
Authentic Relationship Marketing is about letting people know who you are, your authentic story, and your unique message. They want to know what you stand for... your POV (Point of View). I'm sure you'll enjoy this episode as well.
In this episode Steena Marie, my cohort in crime, discussed the reality of the Itty Bitty Titty Committee and how a pirate's treasure is a sunken chest. We also talked about creating a container of trust for our partners. She especially liked the poem that my 2nd husband Terry wrote for me and read at our blessing ceremony. Terry Earthwind Nichols and I had been in 33 year starter marriages before we came together...
I See You Standing There In The Light of My Soul
I see you,
I see you there,
I see you there standing in the light of my Soul.
I see your eyes watching me as I manage composure.
I see your lips pursed for my kiss.
I see your fingers reaching out across your leg as if to touch me.
I see your breath first hasten, then going faster… going faster.
Can you be the one? Can you really be the one?
Can I touch your brow with hands frozen in anxiety?
Can there really be a one? Can she be mine?
Can there be a love so complete that I am finally a man?
Be true my heart for I am but mortal and cannot see through the silkiness of her heart into the Soul for which I long to be.
Her eyes are magical for they bring me to her without even a glance.
She purses her lips again at me and my heart leaps for the joy that will be.
I see you,
I see you in the light of my Soul…
~Earthwind
In this episode, Steena Marie and I chat about transformation. In our lifetime, we will meet others who are however many steps behind us in their journey. It's a real blessing to be able to hold space for them and offer support. We all need someone who is willing to walk beside us. Not somebody who is running in front of us, jerking our collar with a leash and saying, "Come on, come on, let's go!"
Who can process that much transformation all at once anyways?
It's important to hold safe space for others, giving them time and space to process. Steena shares a very touching story of how she did that for one of her friends whose boyfriend had died when they were in high school.
We live in a world where women are becoming more disillusioned with marriage and that sort of picture perfect thing. The pure statistics of marriage is that 60% of marriages will end in divorce. So you have a decent chance that that's going to end up being you or it's going to end up being someone really close to you. Learning how to support each other through all of the complexities of divorce, like having kids with an Ex then moving into a new relationship and building the new relationship, these are things that our mothers never had to do if they never went through a divorced.
We can't really go to them and ask them how they did it or get the support we really need. That's been the key in my relationship with Steena Marie. She had someone who had walked that path. When she came to me in struggle, I didn't just say "get a divorce". I helped her dig deeper because I know the importance of doing the deeper work.
Our emotions aren't right or wrong and neither are our choices. It's important to walk at the level of your Soul so that your choices are in alignment with you. This will allow you to feel empowered in your emotions, rather than feeling like your emotions are running the show.
In this episode Steena Marie and I talked about the abuse of resentment. She referred to a journal letter I had written to my first husband at a marriage retreat. Here's the passage she read from my memoir. "We feel the abuse of your resentment for meeting others needs, before your own." Steena thought that was powerful and mentioned how it goes both ways. Like, if you aren't meeting your own needs, you're gonna resent other people, and they're gonna feel it. Her conclusion was please, go meet your own needs. Say what you need and go get it because people don't want your resentment. Then she read a little bit more from that letter, "I love to meet your needs, yet I often feel frustrated because I don't always know what they are. When you open that door just a crack, I cling to what little pieces of information I can get. I at least try to meet your needs using my creativity, which sadly enough probably doesn't meet your needs at all. I feel we get caught in a vicious cycle of not meeting each other's needs or feeling we have and then being shocked that we haven't." Steena mentioned that she felt what I had written was spot on, and how it highlighted the misery and disillusionment of the cycle and feeling of trying everything you can imagine in order to make someone else happy. She also mentioned how it doesn't work if the communication isn't there.
In this episode, Steena Marie and I discuss the importance of saving things you have written in the past. You never again feel the way you did when you wrote them. So when you're in it, it feels like a bleeding heart. When you look back you see how hopeful you were, the struggle between wanting to be optimistic and wanting to see the best in everyone while attempting to make the most of your situation.
Once we get to 'enough is enough, and I'm done being optimistic about this situation or ef this I'm done' we can look back and see how much effort we put into a relationship in order to make it right. We concluded that we are both complex women, and yet simple things give us great joy.
Steena really enjoyed this particular line from my memoir: "I may be a complicated person, but I really want very simple things."
Steena Marie just finished reading my memoir, my 20th book that was published in 2020. She only cried 5 times while reading the book. Steena is my biz bestie and best friend. We talk 2-3 times a day. Some days she talks to me more than her own partner. As she was reading, Steena was actually finding stories she didn't know about me. She saw similarities between both of our first marriages and how we needed to do so much processing before bringing things to our partners, rather than processing with them. We were constantly doing our best, not to trigger our spouses.
The 3 Stages of the Female Psyche isn’t narrowed down to just women. Both sexes run feminine as well as masculine energy and have a female and male psyche. In this episode, I talk about the human journey and the stages we end up dancing upon. Stage 1 - where we meet. The Predator, Stage 2 - where we don’t own our shit and blame others. Stage 3 - where we are The BITCH (Being in Total Control of Herself/Himself speaking her/his truth from love and authenticity). In order to understand where we come from, we can take a peek at out of body experiences like the one my client had. Have a listen as Jennifer Beitz interviews me in this very insightful episode.
Sales is about talking to people and making friends. We sell to our kids everyday. We even sell to our friends. When was the last time you told a friend about a great movie you know they’d love to see or a book they’d love to read. Telling them the outcome of why they’d enjoy your recommendation reinforces that you really do know them. Have a listen as I fill Jennifer Beitz in on the fact that sales isn’t sleazy, it’s just a conversation.
The Soul is here to experience the experience outside of duality. If you want to stay emotionally healthy, stay out of duality. Everything just is when we embody our divinity. Thanking the Ego is part of our empowerment. You can live as a Human or you can be authentic to who you really are: A Soul, fully embodied when you choose to be. Our perfection connects us on a spiritual level. Our flaws connect us on the Human/Egoic level. When we come to understand that we are perfectly imperfect, this is when we can truly connect with others. I used to help women out of the Dark Night of the Soul, now I empower them to avoid it. Have a listen, as Jennifer Beitz interviews me on what it means to walk at the level of your fully embodied Soul. You won’t want to miss this episode!
Meeting people where they are at allows us to accept others outside of our own perspective. Becoming aware of others' life journeys opens us up to understanding them. Acknowledging their past and becoming curious allows us to see what the other person brings to the table. This creates common ground. Catherine believes that the role of a leader is to invoke the serenity prayer… meaning... accept what we can’t change, change what we can, and have the wisdom to know the difference. I know you won’t want to miss this impactful conversation.
Having compassion for her emotions, Catherine Fitzgerald believes that when we are controlling our emotions, mind over matter, we are not living at the fullest level where we can experience life. Allowing our deep emotions to come through, keeps us open to the world. Life is easier when we come from a place of acceptance of ourselves. We are no longer so quick to criticize, condemn or be suspicious of another person's motives. Have a listen as Catherine shares her powerful message with love.
The focus of Catherine Fitzgerald’s coaching practice is guiding people to embrace the possibilities of their lives, especially CEO’s. Catherine teaches various opportunities to become better leaders and believes in allowing people to be their full selves, rather than having them bifurcate their lives and say, 'Okay, I'm at work, I can't think about anything at home'. In this episode, Catherine says, “For any of us to think that everything at home doesn't intersect with what we do at work is not being very realistic. Nothing has driven that home more than all of us Zooming from home during the pandemic. How many conversations have you had, where somebody's dog or child came into view?” Have a listen, I know you’ll enjoy this conversation.
Season 2
(12/12/2021) Episode 25
Do you have a significant photo or memory from your life? For Catherine Fitzgerald it's a photo of the opera house in Sidney, Australia. Catherine took a picture of it when on her very first trip alone, after raising three boys and entering a new chapter of her life. Catherine had been a CEO and had started coaching them. As Catherine looked back over her life, she recognized that she had learned many lessons from one of her brothers who died young and dealt with Duchenne muscular dystrophy (DMD). She found that her own vulnerability, while embracing humanity with humility, allowed her to appear more accessible as a leader. When we relate with others from our own humanity, people feel safe to connect with us. People don't really relate to perfection. You won’t want to miss this episode.
When you give advice ask yourself who the advice is for? When someone is in emotional distress or just needs some clarity, it's usually split between two things: giving advice that makes you feel good or that makes them feel good. When we lead from ‘I want to feel good’ it’s really easy to miss the fact that the advice was not what the other person needed and we weren’t really listening to them. The only way to move a person forward is to get curious, ask questions, and really tap into what they are saying. Have a listen as copywriter Madison Reid and I discuss the important question of ‘Who is the advice for anyways?’
So when it comes to giving advice ask yourself this question, "How will this advice help?" For intention aligned impact, you can also ask yourself these questions: "Is my intention aligned with the outcome?" In other words is it answering their needs or mine? "How does giving this advice make me feel? Icky? Imposter Syndrome icky?" Most likely yes, because it’s so out of your league and you have no idea how to help the other person. In this episode, copywriter Madison Reid gives sage advice on giving advice. Have a listen as I enjoy another great discussion with Madison in regards to giving advice.
When it comes to giving advice, how does asking ourselves Why, Where, and What questions reduce tension between us and the person asking us for advice? How do these questions gently move others towards a solution? Have a listen as I interview copywriter Madison Reid. I mention that advice that isn’t asked for is like rape, and giving advice when we haven’t even asked for permission is disrespectful. I know you’ll enjoy this deep discussion.
Madison Reid is a highly skilled and in tune copywriter. When it comes to giving advice, Madison understands the value of hitting the "pause" button before responding. Her mantra is 'step back and listen, the answers will come’. The depth and breadth of her hands-on knowledge makes Madison wise beyond her years. She is living proof that we really can let our pasts make us better, not bitter. Have a listen as Madison shares her past with me.
Jason Lebowitz, Founder of XXO Connect believes that we are searching for perfection because we are attempting to protect ourselves. It’s an excuse. Jason loves the unknown. Instead of having to know everything, he can make quick decisions and figure things out in real time. Knowing the HOW isn’t the point, letting go of the HOW empowers us to move forward. Authentic, organic connections bring beauty to the unknown. Just do it and figure it out. Reality does not exist, it’s just a story. Listen in to this deep conversation. You won’t be disappointed.
Connecting to Likes on Social Media is about connecting to the External. Connecting to Life is about the internal. When we look to the external world to validate our self-worth we are unable to connect with ourselves and others. You aren’t responsible to make others like you. It is your responsibility to love yourself and have a good time with yourself. Staying in flow means plan your day, not your life. The simple things do work, just write down what you believe will happen. That’s Jason’s sage advice. We also discussed braving the silence. Have a listen as Jason shares that silence can either ‘cause’ anxiety or ‘take it away’. We can hear ourselves in the silence. There’s a story that is told within the silence. It’s about leaving space in the rhythm of life. Silence also gives us time to process. I know you will enjoy this episode.
Jason Lebowitz, Founder of XXO Connect believes that we are missing out on having a relationship with ourselves. He calls it a distraction when we keep seeking relationships. Jason started a matchmaking service, pulling people offline and meeting them face to face. He told his clients not to hold back so he could make an accurate match.
A month later COVID hit and disrupted what Jason was attempting to disrupt. Jason went on and disrupted the disruption. He created a platform that is stripped down to pure human connection with interactive classes. The community gets to see one another, talk to the instructor (daily masterminds that are also recorded) and open up as they do their own inner work. There is also an app for XXO Connect members, via video chat, without having to share any personal information. These are people who want to be surrounded by like minded people. I know you’ll enjoy this thought provoking episode.
Jason Lebowitz is fascinated with connection and believes it is ‘the root of it all’. This fascination is what has pulled him to where he is today. Jason has a deep understanding of the importance of establishing a true relationship with oneself. He also believes that the search for perfection is the search for protection. After surviving a pattern of toxic relationships, Jason discovered that people using dating apps weren’t really wanting to connect because they weren’t connected to themselves. People keep searching to be accepted. That doesn’t work if you haven’t accepted yourself. You also won’t have healthy boundaries. If you’ve accepted yourself, then not being accepted does not matter. Join us, you won’t want to miss this episode.
LinkedIn Connection Facilitator & Career Development Coach Chelle Shapiro is no longer LIVING for a paycheck. Before becoming an entrepreneur, Chelle used to question herself on a daily basis: “Am I doing the right thing? Am I going in the right direction? Am I the person that I need to be?” She also spent way too much time asking other people these questions for validation. Now Chelle can confidently say, “I am okay with who I am, whether or not anybody else is on board with that.” I know you’ll enjoy this episode.
Every day is a new day. Taking time for ourselves allows us to grow and have the strength to add new skills and opportunities. In this video interview LinkedIn Connection Facilitator & Career Development Coach Chelle Shapiro and I discuss the intriguing concept of happiness over perfection. Chelle says that “perfect is not the answer”. I love her mantra: What I do is good enough and I'm good enough. In fact, I am enough. Have a listen.
Are we expected to know EVERYTHING? LinkedIn Connection Facilitator & Career Development Coach, Chelle Shapiro says, “No way!” In this episode, Chelle shares her frustration in regards to the question…”How come you didn't know that?” and the statement... “You should have known better!” Since her transformation, Chelle’s response to the question and comment is “Screw you!” In this episode Chelle and I discuss our thoughts about making mistakes, not letting fear hold us back, and trip wires in the hiring process. Sit back and have a listen!
This past year has really been about transformation for LinkedIn Connection Facilitator & Career Development Coach Chelle Shapiro. After 13 years of people pleasing and silencing herself, Chelle unleashed her voice. Even though she knew she was going to leave her corporate job, Chelle wanted to take some time to separate herself and to also see if she could slow down. Chelle called her exit plan Operation Separation. I know you’ll enjoy hearing about her adventure.
Rising to meet our true potential, rather than letting the years pass by is part of our purpose. What lights YOU up? I have always made sense of things for myself and others. It’s what I love to do. Have you thought about YOUR purpose, what you’ve done all of your life and done it well? In this episode Dorrit Karlsen makes quite the bold statement. Her idea about getting a license before having kids is hysterical. Sounds quite helpful to me! I know you’ll enjoy the interesting details of this episode.
Dorrit Karlsen Heart Guide says, “We know EVERYTHING, it’s inside our DNA, no need to Google.” I say, “As women, we get all up in our heads and get all crazy.” We get caught in what author Steena Marie calls Thought Loops. The things we have in our heads, those thoughts, are something that we have picked up from everywhere. It’s learned behavior. In today's society we are bombarded with static noise and we forget to listen within. We go to therapy and expect a therapist to figure out what we want, rather than meditating and listening to our own voice. Have a listen, you won’t want to miss this episode.
Once Dorrit Karlsen was healed up and loved up, she was able to take care of her infant grandson. When it comes to marriage, Dorrit talks about how we take our spouses for granted. She wants others to understand that love is not enough: Love is like a fireplace and if we don’t put in those logs of closeness, communication, and the little things... the fire will die. In this episode, Dorrit shares a hysterical story of how her grandmother delegated. You won’t want to miss this episode.
From exhaustion to full blown burnout, Dorrit Karlsen Heart Guide ended up in a hospital bed in fetal position crying for two weeks. Dorrit was so ill she couldn’t work for 7 years; she was merely existing. Finding just the right resources, Dorrit was able to turn her health and emotional state around. Dorrit learned ‘me first’ the hard way and now enjoys helping others improve their lives. Have a listen as I chat with Dorrit about her transformation from feeling unworthy to ‘I deserve to come first’.
You don’t need this, you don't need that. You are enough. Know yourself. What keeps you going? Learn why I keep a Pleasure List and how I threw out my goals, tapped into my vision, and always know my next step for moving my life and business forward. Nimisha Kunnath Chatterjee poses a very important question in regards to understanding who we are and created an acronym for the word VITALS. Have a listen as she shares this invaluable teaching, you won’t want to miss this episode.
As Nimisha Kunnath Chatterjee was going through the transformation stage of being shy to ‘enlightening’ herself on who she is as a gift to the world, she realized her own gift. When we see ourselves as a gift, we take better care of ourselves and we show it to others. Have a listen as I bring up an important point in regards to how we don’t always see what others see. You won’t want to miss this important conversation.
In this episode NLP Practitioner Nimisha Kunnath Chatterjee talks about how the power to set our own identity comes from within. Namisha says, “We have the power to set our own identity and allow it to actually ‘be who we are’. Forget about the world and the time. Enjoy others in the moment. Experience the human connection. We are new everyday and our past doesn’t define us.” Have a listen you won’t want to miss this episode.
Generally shy and introverted, Nimisha Kunnath Chatterjee has always been passionate about relationships and the human connection. Nimisha is also interested in psychology and human behavior. Have a listen to this short episode as Namisha and I talk about ‘playing the role that we are not’.
Designer Dogs are all the rage. Learn what people aren’t aware of when it comes to these dogs. Breeder Dorrit Karlsen Heart Guide shares important information people aren’t usually aware of when it comes to their dog, including how to use or not use doggie treats. I trust you will enjoy this lively conversation from the doggie world.
How can you spot a breeder who doesn’t have your or the pups best interest at heart? In this episode Dorrit Karlsen Heart Guide has been in the dog breeding world since she was 10 years old. Dorrit teaches others about dogs and how to find a good breeder. Dorrit also shares how unfair we can be to our dogs without even knowing it. Have a listen and learn the ‘One’ rule when it comes to dogs. I know you will enjoy this episode.
A fascinating conversation with dog aholic Dorrit Karlsen Heart Guide. Dorrit has been around dogs since she was 10 years old and was trained by an award winning breeder who showed dogs. In order to be Queen of your dog, you get to realize that dogs trust you and want you to treat them right. Have a listen and learn HOW.
It's a Doggie, Dog World with Dorrit Karlsen, Jennifer Beitz, and me. Dorrit and Jennifer found they had something very special in common the first time they chatted on Zoom. I decided to bring them together to share their interesting and fun loving stories about the role dogs have played in their lives.
Narcissistic abuse doesn’t just happen suddenly or overnight. It creeps up until one day you don’t even recognize yourself. It’s slowly dehumanizing. You lose your identity, self-esteem, and confidence... where you become an empty shell of yourself. The reality is that you can recover and reclaim that strong, independent, powerful person you truly are. You can find your own sense of contentment from a place of self-love and inner healing.
Through her personal journey and the circumstances that were occurring in her life, including narcissistic abuse, Dr. Bindu Babu learned to love herself. When we don’t want to deal with something... we often react rather than respond. Learning to feel our emotions is the first step in healing. We can’t heal what we don’t feel. As an Integrative Physician, Quantum Based Transformational Life Coach, Past Life Regression Therapist, and Intuitive Reiki Master… Dr. Babu works with clients all over the world. She guides them through healing so they can leave their past where it belongs and lead a life of fulfillment and happiness.
Due to her journey of narcissistic relationships, Dr. Bindu Babu learned about sustainable healing, mindset, and various Quantum modalities. She has worked and been mentored by some of the great healers of our time, Dr. Brian Weiss MD, Dr. Paul Drouin MD, Dr Amit Goswami, and Dr. Bruce Lipton. It has been a privilege and an attribute to her life purpose to passionately support others on their healing journey. Dr. Babu believes that every one of us has the inner strength and the mending ability to bring forth the positive.
Life is meant to be lived in happiness. It's a journey designed to be filled with love, joy, abundance, and most importantly… fulfilling your purpose. Dr. Bindu Babu believes that our life journey is what makes us what we are today. Being a Medical Physician, she was too left-brained to accept her intuitive abilities. Dr. Babu looked at it as luck or coincidence. She couldn’t see past anything without a scientific basis. Eventually as her life rolled out in front of her, she learned there is much more to life than just science.
When we don’t choose us first we can’t give as much to others. This can easily be seen if we look at motherhood. It’s easy to fill our cup before having a baby. As women, once children arrive in our lives it’s all about them. We can easily start to serve from an empty cup.
Love comes from the heart. We make choices with our hearts. When we choose love, it brings us together as humans. Sometimes people are unlovable towards us, and yet we can still hold space to love them. That doesn’t mean we have to live with them or even see them anymore. We can easily love others when we have clear boundaries. Jenny Landgren believes and teaches that Love is a choice.
Jenny Landgren finds that reflecting and meditating on Truth... owning it and relating to it, allows us to realize we each have our own perspective in how we see the world and one another. When we come from a place of “this is how I see it” rather than “this is how it is for everyone” it leaves room for unity without uniformity. Jenny mentions how easy it is to tell if someone is making room for you at the table. When they do it’s a great start in moving towards deeper connection.
Jenny Landgren seeks to encourage leaders in self-discovery... in order to find clarity and take action in their lives. As a behaviorist and Sweidish social worker, Jenny connects with others at a deep level and teaches tools for better communication. The content Jenny produces focuses on empowering leaders in all areas of business to unleash their team member’s true potential. She loves to connect with others via LinkedIn and Facebook in Swedish or English.
Bhavana BP teaches her clients how they can monetize LinkedIn. Bhavana advises that recruiters don’t just check one’s LinkedIn profile... they look to see how well you showcase yourself through posts, comments, and your overall LinkedIn activities. Therefore, if you want a job it’s important to express yourself. LinkedIn is also a great platform for networking. Some experts say that 70 percent of people ended up in their current position thanks to networking. Others say it's more like 80 to 85 percent. So basically LinkedIn is for networking through personal expression and thought Leadership, especially if you are looking for a job.
The 3 major events in Bhavana BP’s life, shattered her emotionally and at the same time brought tremendous growth. After losing her father, it felt like her father was sending her a message: “Remember who you are.” As she grieved, Bhavana learned to set healthy boundaries both personally and professionally. She began spending more time with her loved ones. She also journaled and began to see the bigger picture and how all things happen for good. Bhavana started to contemplate the positive side of her losses. She learned to forgive and let go. Above all, these traumatic experiences taught Bhavana who she truly is and that no matter what…to never stop loving and to be grateful for all that she has.
Three major incidents in Bhavana BP’s life left her in emotional turmoil. Bhavana was experiencing intense pain and grief. At times she felt like a borderline lunatic. She was very depressed and was dealing with sleepless nights, tiresome days, and irritable moods. The thought of how she was eating away at her savings gave her a headache. At one point, Bhavana felt there was no more meaning to life.
Bhavana BP’s Soul Journey was a series of incidents that happened one after the other.
Before Bhavana could even recover from one, there was yet another blow to her heart.
The first loss was leaving her job which brought a financial setback and a roadblock to her career, as well as a keen blow to her confidence. She felt that ‘all of her hard work’ was for nothing.
The second loss was when a deep soul connection drifted away from her at the end of a long-term friendship.
The third loss was when her father died. They were very close. He was her Mufasa, and he called her his little Simba. The Lion King their movie. After his unexpected and almost unbearable death, Bhavana went numb. Jobs and friendships can be replaced, fathers can’t. This was an irreplaceable loss.
Stepping into her own calling has allowed Therese Skelly to really zero in on her Ninja genius. Equipped with her trusty pendulum, she gets to the bottom of what is getting in your way. Therese blends mindset, intuition, and energy tools to help mission-driven women make more money doing what they love, while adding in a little kickass Mama Bear...with love. Her varied career paths have brought her to being a well-rounded coach who now focuses primarily on mindset. Therese believes that we are all here for greatness and with a background in psychotherapy, she’s here to prove it.
Lore Goldstein teaches entrepreneurs, small business owners, and career changers who they are at soul-level. Lore explores their purpose, strengths, and gifts so that they can create an aligned and fulfilling personal and professional life. She supports them in moving past self-sabotaging behaviors through her powerful gift of quickly uncovering the ROOT cause of why their life or business/career isn’t working the way they would love it to work. Lore is an intuitive advisor, a psychotherapist, influential speaker, purpose and gifts mentor, and hopeless fan of House Hunters International. Lore guides people to know who they are in order to make profitable and important shifts in their lives.