Therapist and a Trainer: Recent Episodes
Justin Lewis and Eric Romanak
A therapist and a personal trainer work on erasing the line between mental and physical health. Also, as Eric the Trainer likes to put it, "A podcast about getting your sh!t together." More info on Facebook and at www.Therapistandatrainer.com
Eric and Justin discuss how a person and athlete quantifies enough. After a story about a recent trip to Iowa classic literature is cited by the therapist. Meanwhile, a famous innovator comes to mind for the trainer.
Just because we're adults doesn't mean we've grown up completely. In this episode Justin and Eric look into some new ideas about maturing. As always the rocks turned up show us new looks at metal, behavior and physical ideas that we might not always consider. Bonus... Find out what spontaneous phrase made Justin's brain light up like up with both intrigue and disdain.
New Years resolutions are virtually an American tradition, but what does it take to be successful? On this episode Justin and Eric break break their hiatus, as well as break down their most important advice to create lasting change in anyone's mental and physical health.
On this final episode of Therapist and a Trainer, Justin and Eric explore how to know when things should end and the best way to do it. Diving deeper into topics such as:
Natural reactions to finality
Ending things at a good point
The desire to have more
There’s a first time for everything and a last time for everything
Inspiring hope
Momento Mori
Contemplating the end
Counting your Mondays
Contemplating death to enhance the presence
Tomorrow is never promised
Making things meaningful
Finishing Strong
Why does finality feel negative
How do you know when to quit
Seth Godin
Repeating patterns
Diversify
The value of settling and good enough
Tolerating deterioration
Hopeful for change
When does quitting make things better
When the purpose is served
When you gave your best
Associating ending with failure
Building trust with clients
Ending therapy
Ending relationships with clients
Having new problems
If you’re out of problems you’re out of business
Ending something doesn’t have to be final
Picking things back up
Taking a break instead of quitting
Allow things to reach their end
The danger of holding on too long
Losing the position
Learning to abandon your position
Trying not to negate hope
Addicted to hope
Subliminal messages attached to quitting
The difference to ending something well versus quitting
Knowing your limitations
Staying in the game
In this episode, Justin and Eric try to answer "what does it really mean to be fit?", and "what does mental health really look like?". Diving into topics such as...
How mental and physical health affects how we interact with others
Weight loss through exercise
Breathing easier
Quality of life improvements through fitness
Self-esteem and mood boost
Being uncomfortable with your physical situation
Making good decisions and having boundaries
Being able to think clearly about what you should and shouldn’t do
Delayed outcomes
Instant feedback
Outcome bias in decision making
Subjectivity and being human
How do you know when you need therapy
Interpreting problematic behaviors
Using big words
Instilling confidence and positioning authority
Looking good makes you feel good
Being capable and not working too hard
Moving through space and time with ease
Measuring your fitness against others
Different kinds of fitness
Being a friend to yourself
Seeing yourself accurately
Knowing what you’re good at and what you’re not good at
Practicing resilience
Bouncing back from failure
Resilience vs toughness
Resisting failure
Injury makes you weaker
Feeling your emotions physically
Svasana or corpse pose
Avoiding unnecessary stress
Preserving and protecting your energy
Environmental changes that affect your nervous system
Treating other people with respect
Not focusing so much on yourself
Eliminating unnecessary competition
The fitness hierarchy
Mobility, structure, attributes, and physique
Strength, power and speed
In this episode, Eric and Justin are joined by Laura Webber and Leslie Donner, as we begin to scratch the surface on differences we see between men and women in our professions. Topics discussed include:
Competitive nature
Sublimation and channeling your negative emotions
The value of human suffering
Differences in men and women
Being receptive to change
Compliance and willingness to try things
Couples working out and dieting together
The difference between male and female brains
Differences in expressing emotions
What men’s emotions often look like
Externalizing and internalizing emotions
Eating different foods for different emotions
Differences in health and fitness goals
The virtue of strength and suffering
Strength related to confidence and health
Why men and women come to therapy
Differences in long term focus
Differences in muscle fibers and athletic qualities
Parenting and discipline
Handling conflict
Infradian cycle in women
Joint laxity and hyper mobility
Communication differences
After Eric completes one of his biggest long term goals by completing the Boston Marathon, he and Justin sit down to talk about what it takes to stay on the path for the long haul to achieve big things. Deep dive topics include:
Achieving long term goals
Running your first marathon
The 126th Boston Marathon
Being consistent
Immersing yourself with people who have what you want
Becoming an athlete
Wanting to be a strong person
The athletic model
High pain thresholds
Handling loss
Making something your identity
Change the way you are by changing the way you see yourself
Being a poser or a hypocrite
Aspiring to an identity
You’re the average of the five people you spend the most time with
Learning quicker from experienced people
Being the runt of the pack
Being the rookie
Paying your dues
No shortcuts
Functional callouses
Toughness
When can you push yourself more
Individual experiences
Qualifying for the Boston marathon
Having support for long term goals
Staying hungry
Cultivating hunger
Rest but don’t quit
Recovering instead of taking a break
Active recovery
Recovery versus rest
Getting injured and disheartened
Head trash
Being afraid to really want a goal
Paying the cost for your goals
We know what we believe when it comes to action
Being careful planning long term goals
Benchmark goals
Building goals from dreams
Finding reasonable goals
Being fully committed
Fatigue and discouragement
Fatigue makes a coward out of any man
Climbing out of the darkness
Not all injuries are created equal
Having a come-a-part
There’s not a no fear option
There’s not a no pain option
Short term pain or long term shame
Goal setting in therapy
Goal setting in couples therapy
Measuring abstract goals
Resolving conflict
Taking ownership
Take responsibility for yourself
Be willing to change
Be honest and trust the process
Investing in your goals
Giving yourself credit
The courage it takes to go to therapy
The courage it takes to start taking care of yourself
Processing shame
Embracing the suck
Phase one of getting back in shape
We all have limitations
Having a reality check with your goals
Genetic ceilings
Exploring all your resources
Being your own worst enemy
What it feels like to achieve a long term goal
Building up things in your mind
What comes after you achieve your long term goals
Satisfying yourself
Raising yourself
Course correcting the child you used to be
In this episode Justin and Eric argue about the definition of stress for 30 minutes, and then edit that part out. The end result is a lovely discussion about stress management and a rekindling of their friendship. Other topics include
Definition of stress
Spectrum of stress
Adapting positively or negatively to stress
Hypostress and atrophy
Eustress and positive stress
Distress and trauma
Acute stress
Chronic stress
Athleticism and stress
Stress management
The difference between a perceived and actual threat
Proximity of threat
Adrenal dump versus drip
Advantages of trained fighters
Our feelings are stupid
Elevated heart rate during stress
Short term survival
Fight or flight response
Focusing on what you can and can’t control
Marcus Aurelius’
Fight, flight or freeze
Contributing to the outcome
Why people don’t vote
Convincing people of your political views
Breathe and move your body
Not just waiting for something bad to happen
Receding stress with movement
Getting stress out of your tissue
Feeling catharsis after exercise
Having a sense of control with stress
Meditation and cleansing breaths
Sympathetic and Parasympathetic nervous system
Participating biologically with stress management
Self compassion
Identifying where suffering is coming from
Finding ways to pick ourselves up
Encouraging ourselves
The definition of sin
Being hard on ourselves
Prioritizing sleep and recovery
You’re not special
A workaholic species
Agricultural revolution and work ethic
Working harder to survive
Producing melatonin with the sunset
24 hours news cycle
Shift work
The rhythm of your recovery cycle
Playing with bad drummers
Athletes and days off
Work smart and hard
Even the earth needs to rest
Seasonal mood disorder
Human connection and social support
Improving your stress response
Reaching out to others
Different versions of love and affection
Having the ability to laugh at yourself
Eric and Justin talk about simple things that act like shortcuts to health. Justin tries to attempt a new world record for saying "hyperlink" in a single podcast episode. Deeper diving into topic like...
Episode 8: First Nutrition Habits
https://www.buzzsprout.com/1894628/episodes/10069119
Simple things to boost mental health
We re going to find what we look for
Putting effort into finding the positive in things
Gratitude journaling
Body language behind positivity
Law of attraction
Being grateful for the state of the world
Increasing wealth
Declining deaths from childbirth, war, famine and plague
Negative media
Positive Psychology treatments
Building on strengths
Interpreting the external world
The importance of breathing in exercise
The intelligence of your breath
Symptoms of a threatened nervous system
Exercise as self induced stress
Holding your breath when you exercise
Sympathetic arousal posture
Holding your breath to recruit strength
Decompressing with exhales
Breathing as a sign of perceived weakness and struggle
Digging deep
Episode 4: Treat Yo-Self
https://www.buzzsprout.com/1894628/episodes/9750298
The struggle is the point
Going to failure in fitness
Exercising more with better breathing
How to breath while running or exercising
Exhale on effort
Overriding your stress system
Channel capacity in exercise
Removing things from your life
Removing news and social media
You are what you read
You are what you watch
How media impacts your mental health
What goes in comes out
Paying attention to what you consume
Negativity as a stimulant
Assessing threats and the nervous system
Actual threats versus perceived threats
How much news should I watch
Opinions versus information
Stoicism
Serenity prayer
Controlling how you respond to thing out of your control
Seva Distance Project
Running Coaching
Couch to 5k
Accountability for runners
Mobility
Physical hierarchy of fitness
Stretching and flexibility
Yoga
Reclaiming your full range of motion in your joints
Easing into fitness
Stress in body tissue
Resist the emotional slingshot
Relieving your pain
Ego writing checks your body can’t cash
Burnout and exhaustion
Adrenal fatigue
Starting point of fitness
Finding the right yoga class or teacher
Keeping up with the herd
Self determination theory
Finding encouragement from other people
Participating in a support system
Connectedness
Having people check on you
Maintaining friendships
Longer lifespan and a healthy social life
Not liking people
Connecting with other humans
Feeling good about yourself
Not liking yourself
Brutal honesty looking in the mirror
Buddy system
Investing in yourself
Investing in your health
You have to invest if you want a return
Having skin in the game
Hiring a coach
Getting ahead with accountability and education
Having natural athleticism
Stair stepping into fitness
The sacrifice of health
The sacrifice of illness
Higher quality of life
Therapy in a moment of crisis
Smug mug
Justin and Eric sit down with Licensed Psychological Practitioner, Leslie Donner to discuss the minefield of raising kids to eat better and be physically active. Deep dive topics include:
Therapy for women and teenagers
Eating disorders
Anorexia, bulimia, binge eating disorder
Evaluations for seeking weight loss surgery
Healthy mindset with food
Healthy relationship with food
Childhood obesity
Growing up overweight
Navigating teenage weight loss
Modeling healthy behaviors for children
Long term strategies
Health conscious kids
Rigid diet and exercise
Trying every diet
Help Lord the devil wants me fat
Mediterranean diet
The way down diet
Using religion to lose weight
Extreme mindsets
Body image impact from the parents
Earning food
Educating kids about eating healthy and being active
Epigenetics
Kids with healthy metabolic profiles
Childhood obesity statistics
Food versus consumable product
Trusting fast food
Stopping eating meat
Cortisol and diet
Obesity and alcoholism
Set point
Being obese without other health issues
Carbohydrate intolerance
Is obesity a choice
Letting kids being involved in cooking
Educating kids about food
Letting kids play with their food
Food accessibility
Diet culture
Kids self moderating food intake
Keeping kids active
Playing with your kids
Exercise as punishment
Talking to your kids about exercise
Installing exercise equipment for your kids
Not commenting on size
Affirming the right values with children
Academic performance from nutrition and hydration
Food as a drug
Giving your kids candy and junk food
Food is fuel
Teaching your kids about calories and energy
Guilty pleasure
Headsweats performance and custom apparel
Celebrating obesity versus body positivity
Overeaters anonymous H.A.L.T.
Justifying laziness and eating poorly
High school activity levels dropping
How to get non athletic kids to embrace physical activity
Intrinsic motivation in children
Overhauling diet
Changing the way kids think about themselves
Justin and Eric get close as they share a microphone, so Holistic Nutritional Consultant and Personal Trainer- Laura Webber, can drop some great knowledge on the other mic. Laura shares with everyone her 3 most important habits to start with that make the most dominoes fall on a diet journey. Deep dive topics include...
Holistic Nutrition
Meeting people where they are
Confusion in nutrition
Many aspects of nutrition
Coaching habits
Bio individualized nutrition
Social components of nutrition
Starting at age 30
Making small changes and getting active
Looking at food in a different light
Rock bottom moments
Partying too hard
Heavy drinking and smoking
Knowing you can do better in life
When something clicks
Trial and error with diet
Evolving diets
3 things that make the biggest difference in nutrition
Where do you start
Identifying where are you starting from
Tracking your food
Big calorie meals
Point A to point B
Taking a hard look at yourself
What sabotages your diet
Calorie counts
How much are you drinking
Meal timing and measuring
Patterns in over eating and under eating
Tracking what you’re eating
Nutrition journaling
Starting a diet without sacrificing
Having a better relationship with food
Being honest with yourself
Confessing your nutritional sins
Drinking enough water
Does coffee hydrate you
Having a water goal
How much water should I drink
Dehydration statistics
Symptoms of dehydration
Becoming energized with water
Keeping up with electrolytes
Consequences of dehydration
Brain shrinkage
Brain fog
Dizziness and accidents
Hospitalizations from dehydrations
Alertness
Headaches
Better sleep
Bathroom frequency
Finding the motivator
Seva Distance project
Online running coaching
Strength and mobility for runners
Couch to 5k
Qualifying for Boston marathon
Being nutrient minded
Negative feelings associated with being healthy
Concentrating on what your body needs
You are what you eat
False marketing
Health halos
Reading the labels
Grams of sugar and processed foods
Removing nutrients in food
Shopping on the outside of the grocery store
Food versus consumable product
Calorie intake and differences for active people
How much can you cheat if you workout
Quality over quantity
Dream crusher and buzzkill
White bread as a gateway drug
There’s no rush into health
You won’t change overnight
Tough love
Justin and Eric chase after life's ultimate goal, but realize that rethinking happiness might be the only way to finally grab the carrot off the stick. Topics covered include:
Defining Happiness
The How of Happiness: A New Approach to Getting the Life You Want, by Sonja Lyubomirsky
A meaningful life
Contentment
Happiness is a dangerous word
Evolutionary system designed to eat and procreate
Chasing sex and stimulation
Equating happiness with pleasure
Homo Deus: A Brief History of Tomorrow by Yuval Noah Harari
Working with your evolutionary systems
Maslow’s hierarchy of needs
Physiological needs
Safety
Love and belonging
Esteem
Self-actualization
People who enjoy all aspects of life
Finding Joy in life
Happiness versus Healthy-ness
Feeling content in any situation
The attributes of satisfied people
Positive brain chemistry
Absence of pain
Having enough energy and vitality to pursue needs
Resilience to stress
Contentment and a sense of accomplishment
Having a lack of regret
Self respect
Clarity and purpose
The byproducts of healthy diets and exercise
As above so below
What happens after you work out
Armoring your body
Mitochondria increase
Not skipping your workouts
Self care is self respect
The clarity of pursuing health
The horse before the cart
The importance of finding meaning
Finding meaning as a head exercise
The need to participate first
Analysis paralysis
Considering how you things make you feel instead of what you think about it
The futility of anxiety and overthinking
Using too much brain energy
Balancing out your system
Channeling anxiety for good
Giving overthinking a purpose
No Stupid Questions Podcast with Stephen Dubner of Freakonomics and Angela Duckworth, author of Grit
Happiness in social context
The right to the pursuit of happiness versus the right to happiness
Easy is incompatible with happiness
Education, welfare, healthcare and pension systems
Jeremy Bentham
The supreme good is the greatest happiness of the greatest number
The suicide rates in the developed world versus traditional societies
Material goods and wealth won’t bring happiness
Eric Erikson’s stages of development
Testing boundaries
Not giving it your all
Taoism
80/20 rule
Giving space to rest and reflect
Proving ancient wisdom empirically
Combining excitement with tranquility
In this episode, Justin and Eric try to live up to their own standards of success by making a podcast about failure that isn't a cliché. Diving deeper into topics such as:
Defining success
Defining failure
Trying a different approach
Expecting and creating a different outcome
Changing your system
Deciding the game you're playing
Game theory
Simon Sinek
Finite games
Infinite games
Depression after achieving your goals
Quality of life
Accepting failure is going to happen
Self imposed expectations
Couples therapy
Couples that overcome conflict
Building closeness in conflict
Biology of failure
Damage and repair cycle
Working out until failure
Is fighting productive?
Reducing anger and anxiety in conflict and stress
Removing inherent pressure of failure
Preparing for anxiety
Preparing for Monday
Guy Wench article link:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-squeaky-wheel/201501/10-surprising-facts-about-failure
What happens to your brain when you fail
Self Compassion after failure
Successful people have failed more often
Failure as a shortcut
Love yourself and challenge yourself
The obstacle is the way
Passion projects at Google
How we learn from accidents
Decision strength
Spending mental energy
Vince Lombardi. "Fatigue makes a coward out of any man"
Why crash diets end in binging
Headsweats custom apparel
Jason Selk
Relentless solution focus
Theory of dominant thought
Focusing on the wrong things
Pink elephant
Channel capacity
The brain can only think about one thing at a time
Always thinking about the negative
Sliding into the failure mindset
Interrupting the rhythm
Cleansing breath
Distracting your brain
Focusing on one thing you can do different
George Lucas "Your focus determines your reality"
Passion replaces negativity
Resilience versus Toughness
Scott Sonnon
Tacfit
World's smartest workout
Severe dyslexia
Learning disorders
Turning disability into genius
Bouncing back from failure
The ability to resist failure
We do not rise to the occasion, but default to our level of training
Resilience always precedes toughness
Thresholds and failure points
Seeing yourself as a biological machine
Resistance to failure
Resistance to recovery
Optimize not maximize
Finding a way to not avoid failure
Fail fast
Believing in failure and recovery
Betrayed by feelings of failure
Possibly everything you ever wanted to know about getting healthy can be learned from Issac Newton's Laws of Motion. From getting off the couch to becoming a disciplined athlete, these principals can get you there. Justin and Eric draw unmistakable parallels to help you stay focused on what's most important and dive deeper into ideas like:
Laws of motion and inertia
An object at motion tends to stay in motion
An object at rest tends to stay at rest
New years resolution mindset
Keeping your mind moving
Working on your memory and capacity
Remembering names
The World Series of Memory
Keeping your mind active and sharp
Being curious about projects
Learning new words
Word of the day
Having a catalyst to get moving
The 4 phases of fitness
Shame, pain and fear
Past, present and future
Fighting through the present moment
The choice of the moment
Seeing yourself in the future
Pain and fear as a motivator
Fear of stagnation
Force equals mass times acceleration
How to make change speed up
Paradox of depression
Looking outside your perceived ability
Therapy as a catalyst
Setting small goals
Identifying barriers and obstacles
Going around barriers or through them
Know your machine
Reaching critical velocity to escape your old life
Looking at a 10 year view
Emotional slingshot
Becoming a different person
Knowing your limitations
Gauging success in couples therapy
Self Check in
Celebrating success
Every argument is the same thing
Willingness and openness to change
Becoming aware of your own predictability, patterns and rhythm
For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction
Reducing friction in our lives
Growing unhealthy with your spouse
Talking to your spouse about getting healthier
Priming your family to succeed in health
Pushing your spouse's buttons
Seeing the problems of your cycle
Taking responsibility with your spouse
In this episode Justin and Eric talk about the human brain’s inherent reward system, and how it gets us both in and out of trouble. Deep diving into topics including:
- Parks and Recreation: Treat Yo-self
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The difference between self care and treating yourself
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How the reward system of the brain works and why it exists
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Dopamine and reward prediction error
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Dopamine created by anticipation
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Pursuing success
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Addictive personalities
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Food being a gateway drug
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Abusing the dopamine system
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Accepting your addictive personality
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Making healthier trades
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Using the reward system optimally
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Making a game out of chores
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List making and accomplishment
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Motivated by rewards
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Getting up early
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Motivated by a sense of superiority
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Positive reinforcement
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Using competition for good
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Removing negative experiences
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Tacfit
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Kelly McGonigal article https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/five_surprising_ways_exercise_changes_your_brain
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mind body health
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The Willpower Instinct, The Joy of Movement, The Upside of Stress
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Fitness and the Reward System
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Exercise high
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Exercise making you more likeable
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Expanding your capacity for joy
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Exercise makes you brave
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balancing your nervous system
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Fitness metaphors
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Lifting heavy burdens, breaking through, enduring discomfort
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Building trust and belonging with fitness
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Collective effervescence
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Communal joy
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Suffering together with others
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Enhancing your self image
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Vulnerability in fitness
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Vulnerability and sex
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Emotional steroids
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Pursuing vulnerability with a partner
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pinnacle of intimacy
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listening to someone else’s needs
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positive self reinforcement
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Giving yourself a plus one
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functional narcissism
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Giving yourself credit
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Feeling bad for not exercising
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The end justifying the means
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Feeling lethargic and bloated after eating
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Eating clean
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Having good energy levels from food
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Long term gratification as a reward
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Reward dosage and frequency
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Feeling guilty from eating
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A balanced reward to work ratio
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Earning your reward
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The importance of short term rewards
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Giving yourself permission to celebrate and reward yourself
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Staying motivated with short term rewards
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Pitfalls of the reward system
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Being creative with rewards
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Managing your competitive nature
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Losing self compassion
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Trap of achievement
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Compulsive and impulsive behaviors
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The economics of health
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Cognitive behavioral therapy
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Being intentional
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Reframing health
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Recovering from being lazy and irresponsible
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Finding a new way of self discipline
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Doing what works for me
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positive negativity
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Feeling worthy of self care
In this episode, Justin and Eric talk about the ups and downs of being a beginner and starting something new as an adult. Deep diving into topics such as:
- The first steps in personal growth
- Naturalness bias
- Overnight success and the problem with YouTube
- The definition of Talent
- What keeps people from starting things
- Fear of failure
- Self Determination Theory
- Pursuing growth
- Autonomy, competency, and connectedness
- Getting up early to exercise
- The Buddy System
- Figuring out your personal system
- Self discipline
- Starting fitness and martial arts
- Tai Chi and Jiu Jitsu
- Watching a class
- Embarrassment ant primal fears
- Showing weakness
- Holding your breath to hide weakness during exercise
- Advantages of being a beginner
- Stimulating your brain with new things
- New Toy Effect
- How to keep your brain alive
- Obstacle course racing
- Pursuing new experiences
- Comfort equals safety
- Becoming likable
- New people at work
- The virtue of humility
- Definition of Humility
- Fear of being vulnerable
- Growing through vulnerability
- Gracie Jiu Jitsu
- The fastest way to excellence
- Considering others feelings, ideas and perspectives
- Getting in over your head
- Developing a passion
- Chronic injuries
- Sleeping well
- Feeling satisfied at the end of the day
In this episode Justin and Eric try to breakdown the difference of thing that we are responsible for, versus how we unknowingly may have found ourselves in an undesirable place in life. They dive deeper in topics such as...
- Growing up overweight, bullying and hitting rock bottom
- Are people really doing the best they can in life?
- Internal and external Locus of Control
- Controlling your destiny vs. bad luck
- Self destructive choices taken in context
- Alan Watts on Environment
- A history on commercial food production, obesity and primal eating habits.
- Overeating as a survival behavior
- Misconceptions on social media's impact on mental health
- Social displacement, and how social media keeps us from being productive
- Men and Women's stress level differences when using social media
- The Paradox of hard work versus convenience and pleasure
- Doing uncomfortable things that are good for you
- Comparing yourself to others on social media
- Accepting yourself as you are
- Using resignation positively
- reasonable expectations
- The importance of self evaluation
- Breaking down goals into smaller steps
- Being predisposed to certain athletic capacities
- Finding purpose through acceptance
- Figuring out the next step
- Giving yourself grace and compassion for how you got here
- The importance of spontaneous play
- Self restraint and impulse control
Justin's research
On Stress and social media:
https://www.pewresearch.org/internet/2015/01/15/psychological-stress-and-social-media-use-2/
Impacting our day to day
https://www.apa.org/members/content/social-media-research
In this inaugural episode Eric and Justin discuss what it means to be on Team Life versus Team Death. The trainer and therapist dig deeper on why physical and mental health are so important and the ways they undeniably crossover. Also digging deeper into the concepts of...
- Growth Mindset versus Fixed Mindset
- Being comfortable with who you are, and being uncomfortable
- Using athletics and fitness for honest feedback
- Pursuing and acquiring vitality
- Slowing down the aging process
- The reason to take mental health and fitness seriously
- Primal hardwiring, survival behaviors and natural instincts that don't serve us
- What a healthy society consists of
- The false choice in mental health of "Am I crazy or not crazy?"