What Would Helen Say?: Recent Episodes
whatwouldhelensay
Welcome to Episode 24 of Season 01 entitled “Hear Me When I Say”
The couple ends this season learning how to truly hear and validate what is being said.
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Welcome to Episode 23 of Season 01 entitled “Knowing When To Let Go”
In this last individual session with Client A, we explore various dynamics in her life related to letting go.
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Welcome to Episode 22 of Season 01 entitled “What We Do For Love”
As the couple continues their exploration of their meta-emotions of love, an all-too familiar hurdle resurfaces.
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Welcome to Episode 21 of Season 01 entitled “The Burdens of Trauma”
Client A explores her past trauma from controlling and abusive relationships and her continued sense of duty to protect others.
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Welcome To Episode 20 of Season 01 entitled 'How I Love Thee'
As the couple has finally laid an old hurt to rest, they explore their meta-emotions of love.
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Welcome to Episode 19 of Season 01 entitled 'What kind of Mother Are You?'
We explore the many facets of being a mother and showing up for your child(ren) in healthy and unhealthy ways.
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Welcome To Episode 18 of Season 01 Entitled "What's Anger Got To Do With It?"
The couple explores their meta-emotions regarding anger and how it connects to vulnerability.
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Welcome to Episode 17 of Season 01 entitled 'Feeling Good'
Client A is back from her bachelorette trip with a newfound sense of empowerment and connection.
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Welcome To Episode 16 of Season 01 Entitled "Band-Aids Aren't Enough"
Couple C wraps up atone, attune, attach to heal past betrayals. They continue to explore their beliefs & fears related to money.
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Welcome To Episode 15 of Season 01 Entitled "Adulting"
Breaking the cycle of family dysfunction requires you to see yourself as an empowered adult, not a powerless child. Advocate for yourself and those who can't.
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Welcome to Episode 14 of Season 01 entitled "Time to Fix the Holes"
Tit for Tat behavior; managing finances in a partnership
Highlights:
Shifting your focus can put an end to the damaging cycle of tit for tat. First know what your relationship with money is, then decide which management skills work best for you.
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Welcome to Episode 13 of Season 01 entitled Empowerment VS Strength
Stooping to their level; appropriate self-disclosure; survivor’s guilt; empowerment over strength.
Highlights:
Honoring yourself should be at the center of all your actions. When you feel empowered you are able to effect change.
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Welcome to Episode 12 of Season 01 entitled Hurt Me, Hurt You.
Meta emotion- anger; betrayal
Highlights:
Betrayal is the resulting emotional reaction to feeling like your trust or confidence in someone has been violated. Betrayal is often associated with infidelity but it has many forms.
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Welcome to Episode 11 of Season 01 entitled Missing You.
Modeling behavior for your child; grief; what is being righteously angry
Highlights:
Grief is the most complicated, never ending emotional process we experience. It’s important to know how to live with it.
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Welcome to Episode 10 of Season 01 entitled "I'm Uncomfortable With Your Feelings".
How to cope with your own emotions, someone else’s; knowing when you’re projecting.
Highlights: You can only support your partner when you’ve separated your emotional experience from his/her’s.
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Welcome to Episode 09 of Season 01 entitled "Emotionally Wounded".
Where to set limits/boundaries; the impact of parental/caregiver reactions to children’s emotions; suicidal ideation.
Highlights: Emotional experiences of your past have either empowered or wounded you.
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Welcome to Episode 08 of Season 01 entitled "Meta-Emotions: Don't Be Sad"
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Meta emotion-sadness. Highlights: Meta emotions is how you feel about your feelings. Having a deeper understanding of how and why both you and your partner react to emotional situations is extremely valuable.
Welcome to Episode 07 of Season 01 entitled "The Freedom of Limits"
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The effectiveness of journaling, limit/boundary setting, accepting who people choose to be.
Here are the takeaways: Setting limits/ boundaries is often misperceived as being mean. The reflection of others that you are being mean is only an attempt to guilt you into assuming their responsibility.
Welcome to Episode 06 of Season 01 entitled "Acceptance and Dysfunction"
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No one marries a carbon copy of themselves therefore personality differences will always exist. But when should you accept the difference and when should you waive the red flag of dysfunction?
Here are the Takeaways: It's important to know the difference between who a person is (personality) and what a person does (behavior). According to the Gottmans, approximately 70% of what couples argue over is based in personality and are unlikely to change. Knowing which battles to pick can be tricky.
Welcome to Episode 05 of Season 01 entitled "Becoming Who You Want To Be"
Along with getting an update on how my client did addressing the delicate situation with her estranged friend we also start to explore other unhealthy dynamics.
Here are some takeaways: Recognizing dysfunctional behavior is not enough to change it. You must shift the associated thought patterns and practice the desired behavior. Progress is never a straight line so be patient and prepared for regression.
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Welcome to Episode 04 of Season 01 entitled "Oral History"
We stroll down memory lane to hear how my Couple became a couple. I explore the transitions of their relationship and what has contributed to present concerns.
Here are some takeaways: John Gottman can predict with approximately 90% accuracy which couples will stay together and which will divorce simply by the way they talk about their history together. This Couple is looking good! There's definitely a lot of hope that they can work through their issues and build a healthy, loving & lasting relationship... despite some dysfunction.
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Ep 03 - "Brewing Storm"
My client begins the session sharing that an estranged friend has reached out to her to reconnect. We explore the beginning of the friendship and what led to the estrangement. My client feels challenged with how to address this situation without exploding.
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Ep 02 - "Dismissed Communication"
This first session focuses on the couple's narrative. A narrative is the description, from each person, of his/her concerns & satisfaction with the relationship. Takeaways: Coming to a resolution for problems isn't always the primary concern. Dismissing your partner's desire for transparency can result in consequences for both of you.
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Ep 01 - "Setting Limits When Overwhelmed"
This Introductory session focuses on information gathering. It is my objective to gain a clear picture of what Client A’s behavior patterns are so I can select the most appropriate interventions to start shifting those patterns. I hope you are able to see how the lack of boundaries, which includes being able to prioritize people and tasks appropriately, contributes to feeling overwhelmed. The perception that everything and everyone is important leads to feeling overwhelmed and sometimes a failure. This does not allow for you to master anything, especially taking care of yourself.
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