Superglue Podcast: Recent Episodes
Meredith McNerney
Do you ever feel like everyone is counting on you to hold it all together? This podcast is for those of you who are the superglue to your family and friends, the superglue at work, and the superglue around the house. As a cancer survivor, mom and wife, and new businesswoman, I am always trying to hold it all together. I hope to inspire you with real stories, productivity tools, and spiritual encouragement. I am an open-minded, God-loving, busy woman who wants to remind you to focus on self-care while being the superglue to everyone else.
Self talk can be a struggle for all of us. In this episode, we will talk about ways to manage the little voice in our heads.
It's not just about motivation or being lazy. The brain science is real! It is important to understand why we procrastinate and how to get started instead.
In this episode we explore learning to trust again by releasing neurotransmitters to regulate emotions. Listen in on Spotify or Apple Podcast.
Are you ever annoyed by people around you? That was sort of a joke! Of course, we all get annoyed. It is up to us to adjust our attitude when others rob us of calm. Tune in on Spotify or Apple Podcast.
Tune in to our next podcast where we learn how Jesus, the Prince of Peace, can give us an inner peace no matter what we are facing.
True happiness is a great goal but set your sights even higher and strive for pure joy. This week I am sharing an embarrassing moment and learning how to choose joy anyway. Listen in via Spotify or Apple Podcasts.
In these economic times, many of us are finding it hard to give as we normally would. But there are many ways to give to others that cost far less than you might imagine.
In this episode, we will speak to Monica Colbert. She is a teacher turned entrepreneur. In this episode, she will share her tips for staying balanced and how she changed careers with intentional planning. We will also explore her new business, chanting as a coping mechanism, and so much more. Resources are linked below!
She taught me so much during this episode. You will not want to miss it!
Monica Colbert's financial services website:
https://livingbenefitsexperts.com/mcolbert
Sound meditation she uses after prayer:
https://youtu.be/L6w8baZqDTw
Her favorite explanation of the Buddhist practice of chanting:
https://youtu.be/oFVcjCuJ1E0
A chanting of the mantra she personally uses:
https://youtu.be/LrTBmYCjWOo
Thank you for listening in! Enjoy these resources mentioned in the show!
I love my phone and how I can instantly "get things done." However, I notice that this need for instant results can lead to a lack of patience. Listen in on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.
How can we possibly "let it go" when we are hurt? Forgiving others is hard. Forgiving ourselves can be even harder. Listen in for tips on how to reduce anxiety through intentional forgiveness.
In this week’s episode, we will talk about time, and how best to use it as a gift, both to others and ourselves. We will also explore what God says about using our time!
I am so excited about this episode because Wendy Zanders, military veteran and mom of two, shares her tips for decluttering in order to cultivate more calm. Wendy, Your Declutter Coach, works with veterans and families with special needs (adults and children). This is an interview you do not want to miss. Wendy shares practical strategies and she left me feeling hopeful about staying focused on what really matters the most. Learn more about her company or join a free Facebook group by visiting: https://www.yourdecluttercoach.com/.
Sometimes I just want to throw clothes in a suitcase and forget about everything. Time with true friends is precious. Listen in to hear about my recent trip on the Margaritaville at Sea Cruise with my college friends. In this episode, we will examine how friendships can be our best medicine at times. At this point in my life, I only invite friends into my life that allow me to be myself...my true self. I hope this episode will inspire you to call your friends and book a trip!
We are all going through so much and waiting can be so difficult. While we wait, it can feel messy and lonely. Consider what God might be teaching you in your season of waiting. Listen in to examine ways to manage the struggles associated with waiting.
In this episode, we will explore what's next. Consider these questions:
What will it take from you (and others) to make what's next possible?
What are you willing to sacrifice?
What do you think God is teaching you in your season of waiting?
As you explore, sit with God instead of being pulled by society.
Are you asking, "What's next?" We will spend the next three episodes exploring what's next for you. In this episode, we get started by asking important questions about your dreams, what limits you, and how to begin the process of moving forward. The questions mentioned in this episode are:
- What do I love to do?
- What am I naturally good at?
- When I picture my future what does it look like?
- What type of lifestyle would I like to have?
Use these questions and this episode as a guide to start the process of asking yourself, "What's next?" Next week we will begin to explore what's next using a few more pointed questions and reflections.
Messages we hear in childhood often stay with us. These messages can sometimes lead to criticism and lower self-esteem. Often we compare ourselves or expect ourselves to be perfect. In this episode, we will discuss what self-love is and how to embrace more of it. We will explore a few cognitive behavior therapy tools that can be applied in order to examine the roots of self-love and how to overcome self-criticism.
In this episode, we will explore a new book authored by Melody Monroe focused on stories of hope. Her book, "Winning Over Whatever: The Ultimate Wow Factor! features 39 testimonies of faith; testimonies of people harmed by rape, addiction, cancer, and other traumas. In this episode we talk about how we deepen our faith by learning about the stories and testimonies of others. Melody also shares creative ways that she worships even during the worst of times. Listen and be inspired!
Learn more about Melody and her book by visiting her website. You can order her book direct from her site or on Amazon or Barnes and Noble. Follow her on social media: Facebook or Instagram!
Choosing the bright side can be hard. Is it even possible to ALWAYS choose the bright side? While there are health benefits to seeing the sunny side of things, it may take some work. In this episode we will talk about how to deal with annoyances and strategies for brightening up our lives!
The gut is often underrated. However, happiness and gut health are completely connected. In fact, your gut is your “second brain." Your gut health impacts production of serotonin which impacts mood and sleep. In this episode we will explore the science behind our gut health and ways to restore it through changes in diet, exercise and prayer. The ultimate goal is to restore our gut health in order to improve our mood, metabolism, and mindset.
Truth be told, I like to be in control. But life does not always work out the way we want and situations we are hoping to control can come unraveled. In this episode, I share a recent experience in which control was taken from me. When we experience disappointments, it is often because we have lost control and that hurts. We can learn to recover with practical tips and strategies for healing. However, we should never feel rushed to "get over it" because part of healing is working through each aspect of disappointment. In the end, I was reminded that God is really in control and I am reminded of the importance of letting go.
Do you ever worry about worrying? In this episode, you will learn to understand your primary and secondary emotions as a method for boosting happiness. The Science of Happiness also helps us understand why we need to move from doing to being. That is, we need stillness in order to thrive. If we avoid being still, or we are afraid to "do nothing" for a while we are actually robbing ourselves of productivity later. Happy people are still sometimes. Tune in to learn why it is important to be still and tips for getting comfortable with stillness.
During this episode I had the pleasure of interviewing Megan Reese, a first year college student who reminds us that we are more alike than different regardless of our age differences. Many of us are parents and we are trying so hard to connect and relate to our children. As a mother to young adults, this episode hit home! Megan shares her personal perspective on how she centers herself during tough times. She shares insights as to what young adults need in order to connect with their parents or other adults. Listen in and learn from this young woman.
I decided to interview her after reading her blog post. Check it out! Her honesty and vulnerability is something we can all learn from!
In this episode, we will explore how laws cause a divide yet love is our calling. As humans we tend to argue over who is right and who is wrong. Black and white thinking can often cause division. Together we will explore what it really means to live a life focused on love. Ultimately, people are good. We will focus on the goodness of humankind and focus our minds on love.
- Think of a person in your life who seems to be very different from you in every way that you can imagine. They might have different interests, different religious or political beliefs, or different life experiences. They may even be someone with whom you have had a personal conflict, or who belongs to a group that has been in conflict with a group to which you belong.
- In this episode we will discuss ways to find common ground when it feels hard to make a connection with someone who seems so different from you. Perhaps it is also time to forgive this person. We will explore the power of forgiveness and use strategies to cultivate more forgiveness in our lives.
Cognitive framing can be used to help us find the silver linings in difficult situations. How we view a threat has a lot to do with our life experiences. We have a lot of power in our thoughts and shifting from threat to opportunity is up to us. Moving from risk to innovation allows us to stay motivated during unsettling times. Using the Silver Lining mediation from Greater Good in Action, we will work on shifting our mindset from threat to innovation by finding the silver linings around us.
In this episode, I interview Supergluer, Alicia Dalton. Alicia is the author of two books
- Let Go!: Elevate Your Destiny and ForgiveThe Let Go!: Elevate Your Destiny and Forgive. ...
- I Can't Keep Calm: He Gave Me Beauty for AshesI Can't Keep Calm: He Gave Me Beauty for Ashes.
and is a mom to two amazing daughters. She shares her tips for coping with difficult circumstances and everyday annoyances, including her laundry ministry. That's right...she even has an awesome way of thinking about laundry! Tune in to learn more about this wife, mother, healthcare executive, and fellow Supergluer.
Alicia's books can be found here:
Link to purchase from Amazon.
One intervention that can help us focus on adaptive responses is called, Affective Regulation. This is our ability to move from unwanted spiralling thoughts which, when left uncontrolled, can lead to depressive symptoms, to a more comforting mindset. PsychologyTools.com offers many tools including this one:
When an unwanted thought occurs put in on display:
- Record the Situation that bothered you. Who were you with? What were you doing? Where were you? When did it happen?
- How did you feel? (Rate intensity 0–100%)
- Interpretation / Thought How did you interpret what happened? What went through your mind?
- Alternative viewpoint: Try to interpret that situation differently. Use the prompts below.
- What other ways are there of looking at this situation? • What would a friend say to me about this? • What would Batman say to me? • Name 3 good outcomes that might come from this event. • When you’re aged 80 and looking back on this event will it still bother you? • What would someone who truly liked themselves think in this situation?
We are emotional beings and we often are influenced by the people around us. The behaviors and attitudes of others have a great influence on our own affect, motivation, attitudes, behaviors. Employees continuously spread their own moods because individuals copy one another’s nonverbal cues, including movements, posture, and facial expressions such as a frown. Negative moods are difficult to overcome, but in this episode will discuss ways to shift negativity and take on a more positive approach.
This episode was inspired by James Clear's book, Atomic Habits (https://jamesclear.com/atomic-habits). We will talk about the concept of Habit Stacking; adding a new, healthy habit to an existing habit to increase productivity. Habit stacking helps us accomplish more because we already have certain patterns in place so it is easier for the brain to connect to something we are already doing.
Sense of belonging has emerged as an important factor that makes a critical contribution to learning and motivation. When we do not feel accepted and connected at school or work, we are likely to "check-out" and productivity is reduced. Therefore, being accepted and feeling valued is correlated with motivation. If we want to cultivate calm we must prioritize psychological safety & belonging.
When we think of self-care, many of us think about physical and mental wellness. But self-care can expand to so many other aspects of our lives! Take a look at this wheel - what area(s)! of self-care have you been neglecting lately? What suggestion do you think you might try?
Check it out here!
In this episode, we will examine the connection between self-esteem and emotional exhaustion. This wheel can be used to help us determine areas to focus on in order to boost our self-esteem.
This episode was inspired by the article, Balancing Your Body Budget by Jeena Cho
In this episode, I share a huge mistake I made and how it impacted my body. It was hard to let go of my to-do list and surrender to my body. My body budget was low and I needed to listen to it. Lisa Feldman Barrett, a professor of psychology at Northeastern University and the author of How Emotions Are Made: The Secret Life of the Brain explains that the body keeps a budget, and like your household budget, you make deposits and withdrawals.
Hey Supergluers!
In our final episode of this season, we will talk about courage. We will take a moment to reflect on our hopes and dreams and meditate on them. I share a new goal of mine that scares me deeply, but with God I will do it anyway.
I will be back in the fall! I am very excited to continue this mission. Until then, please revisit some of your favorite episodes and enjoy every moment of this season.
It's a busy season for many of us which means we are running at a fast pace. Allow yourself the gift of mediation. In this episode, we will engage in a self-compassion mediation to release the yuck and embrace calm. This is one of my favorite meditations. Enjoy!
In this episode we talk about the correlation between self-identity and happiness. When we know ourselves and we feel completely confident in our skin, then we show up authentically in every situation and no longer apologize for who are!
In this episode we continue to explore who we are, how we want to live, and who we want to surround ourselves with in order to live well.
During this episode I share an experience I had recently that changed my outlook on life. After meeting a mother who tragically lost her daughter, I was reminded of the power of living life with intention. That mother taught me that how we live impacts how we die. I was forever changed.
In this episode, we will talk about what it means to pray a powerful prayer: Send Me! I share an experience with a homeless man that showed me how God can send us even when we are hesitant or even when the task appears too small to matter. Where are you being sent and why?
Look within to determine what you are holding too tightly. Search within to clarify what is within your locus of control. Ask the Lord to be with you as you search within to free yourself of attachments.
Dopamine helps us feel motivated even when there is a lot of stress in the background. In this episode, I share how to access the feel good chemical. I am currently experiencing personal stress and uncertainty, but I have made a conscious choice to boost my dopamine and remain happy. It is a game changer when we consciously decide to boost our dopamine. Listen in for tips to boost the feel good chemical!
Productivity is the goal! We all have a lot to do. We want to be efficient and effective. That means we need to talk to each other! We need to lay it all out on the table whether it is during a family meeting or team meeting, routines need to be examined by allowing members of the group to engage in personal reflection first. After that, examine routines that are used within the group. Consider what you need, what the team needs and how you can make changes to improve productivity.
Asking yourself questions leads to fruitful reflection. It can be so scary to sit still and ask ourselves the hard questions. These questions allow us to become more mindful of what we are doing on a daily basis and how our routines are impacting us. Do not be afraid. You are not alone! In prayer, you can examine yourself and the work you need to do without fear.
Seasons are good for us because they offer an opportunity to reexamine our routines. Some of our routines are scaffolds that actually lift us up - they reduce stress and help us thrive. Other routines are also ineffective and need to be cleaned up. Take a moment to examine your routines to ensure you are able to bounce back when unexpected changes occur.
In this episode we explore scripture that helps us understand authentic love. We will examine how much the Lord loves us and how He looks for the lost to provide them comfort.
Thank you to everyone who sent in a prayer. In this episode, we will lift up our community in prayer. We will talk about times we do not feel connected and how we can reconnect. Listen in and ask for what you need!
What are your happiness triggers? What gives you that little boost to help you endure? In this episode we will also plan for Episode 100! Listen in and share your ideas!!!!
"Enjoy the journey!" Oh my, isn't that overused? Sometimes I hate that because I am terrible at enjoying the process. I want to get where I want to go. But when the dust comes, I get distracted, and the process gets messy. I have to learn to shake off the dust - shaking off what might be standing in my way of shaking off what makes the process less enjoyable. Sometimes we get stuck because we want to be liked and seek approval from others. Shake that off, Supergluer!!! In this episode, we center ourselves on God so that we can shake off what does not matter!
Do not give up when the process is hard. We are meant to endure with the Lord as our guide.
Hebrews 12:1-3 NLTTherefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne. Think of all the hostility he endured from sinful people; then you won’t become weary and give up.
We are going to address perfectionism so that we can get back to being kind to ourselves. In this episode, we will take a quick self-assessment to determine if perfectionism is getting in our way of thriving.
In this episode, we will talk about our body's natural ability to regulate and self-soothe. From our conception, we learn this skill and our mother's heartbeat becomes a source of comfort. Reconnect to your natural rhythm within in order to overcome stress and anxiety.
In this episode, we will draw on the wisdom from this book:
Anxiety Relief for Teens: Essential CBT Skills and Mindfulness Practices to Overcome Anxiety and Stress Paperback – Illustrated, March 31, 2020by Regine Galanti PhD (Author
I will highlight some of my fav tools and tips!
FOGO - Fear of Getting Old
As early as age 18, we begin to fear getting older. Fear not, my friends! Aging is a beautiful gift! In this episode we will talk about tips to keep your spark as you age!
As we age, we may struggle to match what is happening on the outside and how we feel on the inside. I often look in the mirror and am surprised by how I have aged because I still feel pretty young on the inside. Instead of focusing on a youthful appearance, embrace your wisdom. As we age, we still have sparks inside of us. They just look different on the inside and out. The changes are beautiful and meant to be enjoyed.
During a recent conversation with my daughters, I realized that I had an - embarrassing to admit - fear of gaining weight. By digging deeper, I realized this wasn't about my body at all but rather using my body as a way to cover up a deep rooted fear. In this episode, I share how I got my spark back and realize that my fear wasn't about the thing on the surface at all. As Michael Jr. said, "Life will bring you people and circumstances to reveal where you’re not free yet." I needed to dig deep into my fear and understand where I was not free. What I really fear is losing my spark - aging and not having that spark that I used to as a young person. Now my spark is relit. Remember, "Peace does not come from changing your circumstances peace comes from changing you."Dig deep with me in this episode.
These quick tips will help you self regulate with ease. Slow down enough to rewire your stress response and do something good for yourself today!
Gently Touch Your Lips
Your lips have parasympathetic fibers spread throughout them, so touching them activates the parasympathetic nervous system. Take one or two fingers and lightly run them over your lips.
Be Mindful – Don’t Multitask
Try not to multitask and be mindful of what you are doing. Toni Bernhard in her book, How To Be Sick – A Buddhist Inspired Guide for the Chronically Ill and Their Caregivers, quotes Korean Zen master Seung Sahn who liked to tell his students, “When reading, only read. When eating, only eat. When thinking, only think.”
Use Visualization
**Use visualization and imagery to stimulate the parasympathetic nervous system. Picture yourself in a peaceful place that you love. It could be the ocean at sunset, a mountain stream, a beautiful lush forest, a secluded beach, a field of wildflowers, or any place you enjoy and feel relaxed. Use all your senses as you visualize the place in this imagery. Hear the sounds of the waves, feel the breeze on your face, and smell the scent of the flowers. You’ll feel relaxed in no time at all.
Credit to: https://canyonvista.com/activating-parasympathetic-nervous-system/
Check out their work by visiting the link above!**
Ever get stuck in negative thinking? We all do. It's work to re-train our brains - and it's on-going work. Listen in for a few tips and remember to slow down to see the good around you!
So...I now understand the reason for my fall. What a gift it was, actually. My fall prompted me to get my eyes checked and something scary was detected during the routine screening. We waited two dreaded weeks for further results and now I am super grateful for this wake up call. I am going to be just fine and the good Lord answered my prayers. But I hope you will consider what you are grateful for and wake up enough to see the good around you!
Why do we think we need to sprint all of the time? Are we not worthy when we are recovering? Are you struggling to pull back and practice self-care because the stress in your life is too big and overwhelming. Listen in for perspective and remember to slow down!
Do you tend to judge situations too quickly? The story of the Chinese Farmer helps us remember to stay open and detached especially when we are struggling. Credit to Alan Watts:
The Chinese Farmer Story
Once upon a time there was a Chinese farmer whose horse ran away. That evening, all of his neighbors came around to commiserate. They said, “We are so sorry to hear your horse has run away. This is most unfortunate.” The farmer said, “Maybe.”
The next day the horse came back bringing seven wild horses with it, and in the evening everybody came back and said, “Oh, isn’t that lucky. What a great turn of events. You now have eight horses!” The farmer again said, “Maybe.”
The following day his son tried to break one of the horses, and while riding it, he was thrown and broke his leg. The neighbors then said, “Oh dear, that’s too bad,” and the farmer responded, “Maybe.”
The next day the conscription officers came around to conscript people into the army, and they rejected his son because he had a broken leg. Again all the neighbors came around and said, “Isn’t that great!” Again, he said, “Maybe.”
The whole process of nature is an integrated process of immense complexity, and it’s really impossible to tell whether anything that happens in it is good or bad — because you never know what will be the consequence of the misfortune; or, you never know what will be the consequences of good fortune.
How do we find hope while we are waiting? Let's face it - we are always waiting. We are waiting on results, news, updates, outcomes. It's so hard to wait! Let's talk about attachment and detaching from the past and future to wait in peace.
So we know perspective matters. Looking at things with a half-full cup truly does lead to heal benefits. But what about when we fill our cup to the point of overflow? Could it be better to decrease what goes in the cup to leave margin for reflection and space for growth?
It's a time of reflection for many as they are deciding whether to stay or go. Highlighting a great worksheet with five questions (thank you to the author from Positively Present)
Download the Stay or Go Worksheet!
Either way, it will be hard. There are ups and downs in all of our choices. What a gift it is when we can choose. Take a moment to reflect on your next big decision. Ask God to clarify your decision and choose the hard that works best for you!
A recent girls' weekend has me filled with joy yet a lot of ups and downs. Literally ups and downs. In this episode I talk about two recent accidents and the struggle to making meaning of all of the mess. Sometimes God speaks to us and we hear Him instantly. Other times we feel we are waiting to make meaning of what is happening around us.
We are all impacted by how we were raised. Our ability to give self compassion to our young people is everything. They are learning from us! Listen in to learn about a recent experience that impacted our family and the choice to utilize self compassion.
This is hard. I made a huge mistake and let people down. This sent me into a spiral and left me feeling low. We must remember that we are human. Mistakes are a part of the growing process. Listen in to turn your self judgment into kindness. XO
I have missed this community! I am excited to be back and connect with all of you. Thank you for your patience with me as I needed time to reflect and reset. XO
Hey friends!
I am so incredibly grateful for your support. The Lord has certainly blessed me with a lot of work after starting my own business in June. I am finding myself moving at a fast pace again and need to pull back a bit. For my own wellness, I am going to put our podcast on hold. I will stay in touch. I have every intention of doing this again, but for now I need to refocus my time. I wish you all the very best. Thank you for listening in!
Meredith
1. How do you start your day?
2. How do you end your day?
3. What's a book that changed your mind and why?
4. What's a strategy to keep focused?
5. When you were a kid what did you want to be when you grew up?
6. What did you learn from the worst boss you ever had?
7. Who has influenced you most when it comes to how you approach your work?
8. What inspires you?
9. What does work-life balance mean to you?
10. How do you prevent burnout?
- Increases happiness.
**It reduces anxiety, boosts your mood, and even slows your heart rate
-
Reduces dementia.
It reduces depression and isolation, and can also help people with dementia tap back in to their personalities and sharpen their senses -
Improves mental health.
And it can also help you process trauma. -
Makes you smarter.
Studies show that people who play instruments have better connectivity between their left and right brains**. When the two hemispheres of your brain communicate with each other, your cognitive function improves.
Ya'll...I have a story to share in this episode about a super embarrassing sing moment. Music helped me get over the yuck recently. Listen in to learn more!
In our fast paced society where productivity is highly valued and instant gratification is coveted, it can be very difficult to step away, unplug and just sit quietly with ourselves. Let's discuss the benefits of meditation and take a moment to simply sit. Like many things that are good for us, this can be hard. The time is worth it because you matter. Be gentle with yourself and take time to restore your soul.
In The Prayer Process we take time – a minute, two minutes or maybe ten minutes - to spend time with the Lord every day.
Pick a specific time when you will pray; ex. Morning Prayer or Night Prayer.
It is an intentional way that we grow in our faith.
The seven steps of The Prayer Process are as follows:
1. Gratitude: Begin by thanking God in a personal dialogue for whatever you are most grateful for today.
2. Awareness: Revisit the times of the past twenty-four hours when you were and were not the-best-version-of-yourself. Talk to God about these situations and what you learned from them.
3. Significant Moments: Identify something you experienced today and explore what God might be trying to say to you through that event (or person).
4. Peace: Ask God to forgive you for any wrong you have committed (against yourself, another person, or Him) and to fill you with a deep and abiding peace.
5. Freedom: Speak with God about how he is inviting you to change your life, so that you can experience the freedom to be the-best-version-of-yourself.
6. Others: Lift up to God anyone you feel called to pray for today, asking God to bless and guide them.
7. Finish by praying the Our Father.
Life is messy.
It isn’t a color-within-the-lines exercise.
It’s a wild and outrageous invitation
full of uncertain outcomes.
The mess of life is both inevitable and unexpected.
It is filled with delightful mysteries
and frustrating predicaments.
In our disposable culture,
we throw broken things away.
So, what will we do with broken people,
broken relationships, broken institutions, broken families,
and of course, our very own broken selves?
We are all broken and wounded.
The answer will fill you with hope.
There has never been a more urgent need
for us to attend to what is happening within us.
- Matthew Kelly (Author, Life is Messy)
Habits 4 and 5 focus on creating Win-Win situations by engaging in the practice of seeking to understand before needing to be understood.
Habit 1 helps us understand how to utilize a proactive mindset which is produced through suffering. Gear up...my tears start flowing at the end because this topic is just so meaningful to me. I hope you find it purposeful.
Romans 5:3-5
More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.
This is our final episode of 2021. Thank you for listening and know that you are loved!
What evidence do you have to make your fear real? Let's talk about how to sift through the evidence and focus on love.
Your best...not her best...not his best...not the best at everything.
“God is life. God is life in action. The best way to say, "I love you, God," is to live your life doing your best. The best way to say, "Thank you, God," is by letting go of the past and living in the present moment, right here and now. Whatever life takes away from you, let it go. When you surrender and let go of the past, you allow yourself to be fully alive in the moment. Letting go of the past means you can enjoy the dream that is happening right now.”
― Don Miguel Ruiz, The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom
“If others tell us something we make assumptions, and if they don't tell us something we make assumptions to fulfill our need to know and to replace the need to communicate. Even if we hear something and we don't understand we make assumptions about what it means and then believe the assumptions. We make all sorts of assumptions because we don't have the courage to ask questions.”
― Miguel Ruiz, The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom
- “Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering.”
- “There is a huge amount of freedom that comes to you when you take nothing personally.”
- “Taking things personally makes you easy prey for these predators, the black magicians. They can hook you easily with one little opinion and feed you whatever poison they want, and because you take it personally, you eat it up. You eat all their emotional garbage, and now it becomes your garbage. But if you do not take it personally, you are immune in the middle of hell. Immunity to poison in the middle of hell is the gift of this agreement.”
Credit: Doug Cartwright - I create tools and methods that help others become the best, happiest, most fulfilled versions of themselves.
This week we will examine powerful messages from the book: The Four Agreements.
“If someone is not treating you with love and respect, it is a gift if they walk away from you. If that person doesn't walk away, you will surely endure many years of suffering with him or her. Walking away may hurt for a while, but your heart will eventually heal. Then you can choose what you really want. You will find that you don't need to trust others as much as you need to trust yourself to make the right choices.”
― Don Miguel Ruiz, The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom
Who or what is priceless to you? How often do you live for the people or live out the values that are priceless to you?
Yup...you are a genius. You have gifts. Find out how to access your genius. Name it. Celebrate it. Get in your flow, SUPERGLUER! XO
Don't Jump To Conclusions
According to Psychology Today, when people make a judgement about you, or critiques, they are rarely about you. "In fact, it’s almost always about them, their issues, their needs, and their desire to control you and/or a situation," writes Dr. Abigail Brenner. To help manage your response to confrontation, know what you're sensitive about, and what triggers your emotions so you can prepare yourself if someone mentions them.
Visualization is a useful technique that helps you reach your goals and make tweaks that are empowering to your wellbeing. This mind tool gets your body and soul ready for what is next! Practice every day because you deserve time to "see" what is possible!
Is there something you are avoiding? Is avoiding it making you anxious? Start small, my friend, but just do it! Get an accountability partner and take action.
"Waste" a little time doing something you love. Then watch your productivity soar and your mood lighten.
It might be time to let someone go in order for you to be your best self. Pray about it. We all deserve friendships that are uplifting and full of joy.
This one gave me all the feels - maybe it's because I remember so many times when I had to turn to God to accept hardships and I am reflecting on the goodness that comes out of suffering. I wish that for you too, Supergluer!
Try these tips to center yourself! (Courtesy of The Stanford Medical Team: Employee and Workplace Wellness):
- Mindful eating: This is a quick and efficient exercise that not only increases your practice with mindfulness, but teaches you how to fully savor your meals. In mindful eating, you are encouraged to eat slowly and pay close attention to the flavors, appearance, textures, and smells of each bite, as well as your own feelings while eating (Bjarnadottir, 2019).
- Progressive muscle relaxation: While inhaling deeply, intentionally tense up a specific part of your body, such as your jaw, for 15 seconds. After this, exhale while relaxing that part of your body. Focus on the difference in feeling of tension and relaxation in those muscles, then repeat the exercise with 6–8 body parts. By focusing on one body part at a time, your mind stays centered on the present moment and grounded in your current experience (Cuncic, 2020). You can follow a guided progressive muscle relaxation exercise online.
- Body scans: After taking a few deep breaths, focus your attention on your feet and become aware of any sensations you may have in them, such as tension, tingling, temperature, itching, or pain. Acknowledge any sensations and feelings without judging them. If your mind starts to wander, gently bring it back to that body part. Slowly move your attention to another body part and again acknowledge any sensations or feelings without judgment. Continue this practice until you have scanned your entire body (Scott, 2020). You may wish to try a guided body scan.
- Spending time in nature: On average, Americans spend 93% of their time indoors (Li, 2018). However, time spent in natural environments, such as forests or beaches, often helps individuals to connect both with the present and with their senses. Additionally, it has multiple health benefits, including stress reduction, faster recovery times, and improved mood (Li, 2018). Even when inside, looking at images of natural spaces, having houseplants, listening to nature sounds, opening a window, and natural light can all positively affect well-being (Gengoux et al., 2020:197).
Jonah 2:6-7
I went down to the mornings of the mountains;
The earth with its bars closed behind me forever;
Yet You have brought up my life from the pit,
O Lord, my God.
Jonah is feeling hopeless and filled with despair. God rescued Jonah. God is always the God of grace.
In this episode, we will talk about a communication framework after a difficult encounter. I open up about an experience in my marriage. Let me know if you use the tool and how it works for you. Here's the framework:
I feel ………… (the emotion), when ……...… (the occurrence). It makes it (reason/because) ______________.
BE SURE TO STATE WHAT YOU EXPECT IN TERMS OF APPROPRIATE BEHAVIOR
Here's another tool!
Just a little note to let you know that I am learning that it is okay to take something off of my plate. I love this little podcast, but today was a super busy day and I am wiped out. I am so excited to record a new episode tomorrow (Tuesday) and launch it on Wednesday!! Until then, have a kick ass day and remember to pray without ceasing! :)
To me, venting is necessary. Gossip can dim your glow. Check your heart and you will know the difference!
Quick tip: Reflect on a team member’s positive traitsWhen feeling frustrated with a co-worker, it is easy to focus on their supposed negative traits. Instead, practice gratitude by making a quick mental list of three positive traits they possess – even if you do not feel like it. Utilizing gratitude, especially in moments of frustration, can help to provide you with perspective and remain active in your team collaborations (Healy, 2017).
- Practice perspective-taking: This is the act of understanding another person’s point of view by considering their feelings and motivations, and temporarily setting aside your own. It is not necessary to imagine yourself in someone’s situation to understand their perspective. Perspective-taking allows you to grasp how another is feeling without “taking on” those feelings, and is a less stressful method of practicing empathy (Duffy, 2019).
Understand your judgments, where they come from, why we have them and how to replace them with empathy!
Check out the Woebot App in the app store and learn how this tool can help you manage emotions and access tools for wellness!
Use this Worry Worksheet from Therapist Aid to help you process your worries!
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Beck, J. S. (2011). Cognitive behavior therapy: Basics and beyond (2nd ed.). New York, NY, US: Guilford Press.
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Roelofs, J., Rood, L., Meesters, C., Te Dorsthorst, V., Bögels, S., Alloy, L. B., & Nolen-Hoeksema, S. (2009). The influence of rumination and distraction on depressed and anxious mood: A prospective examination of the response styles theory in children and adolescents. European child & adolescent psychiatry, 18(10), 635-642.
Control that mind, Supergluer. Our cognitive biases will have to force us to jump to conclusions. Instead, slow down and examine the gray areas.
Yup...it happens. You are going to deal with people who irritating people. As Christians, we need to see the big picture and be careful of our cognitive biases when dealing with difficult people.
Want to understand your brain? You must understand the science behind Cognitive Biases and how to stay in control of your mind. Be well, Supergluer, and Happy Friday!!!
You've got problems? Well, of course you do. We all do. Let's talk about why it's important to pick our problems, accept them, and then notice the blessings despite our problems!
Why should we sacrifice? When should we make sacrifices and how do they help us show up to live our best life?
ZEAL! What is it? What do we do when we have it? What about when we don't have zeal? Do not be afraid. We all struggle. Let's get real together!
Happy Friday! Do something amazing for yourself and spend time with the people who restore you!
Psychological safety is defined as “a shared belief that the team is safe for interpersonal risk taking” and “a team climate characterized by interpersonal trust and mutual respect, in which people are comfortable being themselves” (Edmondson, 1999:354). Psychological safety in the workplace is a vital concept in understanding company culture and team dynamics (Edmondson & Lei, 2014). In psychologically safe teams, team members are not afraid to admit to their mistakes, ask for help, share their opinions, or challenge others’ opinions.
Learning about various personalities will not only allow you to grow but you can learn how to manage and uplift people with personalities that are different than yours!
There is the risk that individuals who view their work as particularly meaningful are more likely to sacrifice their self-care and can be at a higher risk of experiencing burnout. Taking a break from work (both in the form of short breaks throughout the day and longer vacations and time off) is a necessary part of preventing burnout and staying productive. In careers where there is never a convenient time to take a break or formal leave, it is especially important to plan for time off and to keep to that commitment. Plan for, protect, and proceed with self-care!
People often do this with the best of intentions. Have those hard conversations and invite vulnerability into the space. Here are a few tips!
Plan for It
Script out what you want to say.
Delete what is not necessary.
Highlight 1-2 things that need to be said.
Be willing to admit your own mistakes.
Set up a time to talk.
Give a quick overview to explain what you want to talk about in the most neutral way.
Ask questions to show you are willing to listen: "Is there a way we can make the process more efficient? Is there anything I can do individually to make it easier on you?”
John 8:32 ESV
- And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”
Proverbs 11:3 ESV
- The integrity of the upright guides them, but the crookedness of the treacherous destroys them.
Don't be afraid to get wet. You are a change-maker. Here are some tips to empower you!
- Find a place to clear your mind and then write down 2 goals you have for yourself.
- Consider who is not listening or what needs to be said. Write them a letter. Sit with it for a day and then decide if you need to say it.; in-person would be best. Go into with the intention to be supportive of their ideas and remove status from the conversation.
- Ask for job responsibilities that excite you.
- Focus on your hobbies and passions when not at work.
- After a lot of careful consideration, if it is best for you then consider a job (or even career) change.
Nurturing Your Relationships
- Reach out to your best friend who always makes you feel better.
- Call an old friend who you haven’t talked to in a long time.
- Have deep conversations with family members.
- Expand your circle of friends by going to community activities that align with your interests.
- Create “families of choice” if your own family is unable to meet your needs.
- Seek group therapy if you feel misunderstood by friends and family.
- Join a community sports team, choir, or other similar group.
- Talk to strangers.
- Put your smart phone on silent and away and have a long conversation with yourself or a close friend!
Insights:
Romans 8:26 ESV
- Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.
Mark 12:31 ESV
- The second is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.”
If You Have Less Than 3 Minutes
- Do 10 jumping jacks.
- Set an alarm for 2 minutes and focus mindfully on your breathing, nonjudgmentally bringing yourself back from any distractions.
- Do a power pose to increase your confidence and lower your stress.
- Write down 3 things you feel grateful for.
- Write down 3 things you like about yourself.
- Take a quick work break to walk around your office.
- Listentoanempoweringsong.
- Write a “nice to meet you” or “thank you” email.
Insights -2 Corinthians 9:7 ESV /
- Each one must give as he has decided in his heart, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 ESV /
- Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.
If You’re Feeling Overwhelmed, grab some tea and sit with God. Consider these ideas:
- Make a to-do list.
- Pick 2-3 small tasks and get them done so that you feel a sense of accomplishment.
- Delegate work if possible.
- Ask for help.
- Vent to someone who you trust to help you find perspective.
- Remind yourself that work and life stressors ebb and flow, and that there is an end in sight.
- Ask a colleague if instead of meeting in an office, you can do a walking meeting to help get your blood pumping while you work.
1 Corinthians 6:19-20 ESV
Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.
1 Corinthians 9:26,
"Therefore I do not run like someone running aimlessly; I do not fight like a boxer beating the air."
James 3:17 ESV
- But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere.
Galatians 5:22-23 ESV
- But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things, there is no law.
In this episode, I mention the Think UP app.
Today's scriptures:
Jeremiah 29:11 ESV
**For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.
God is able to do immeasurably more in my life than I could ever imagine (Ephesians 3:20)
I live by faith, not by sight (2 Corinthians 12:7).**
James 1:12 ESV
Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him.
Galatians 6:9 ESV
And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.
Romans 5:3-5 ESV
More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.
Romans 12:12 ESV /
Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.
Galatians 6:9 ESV /
And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.
Mission: Here we get real, share a morning prayer, and gear up for a kick-ass day.I reference these cards a lot - Check them out if you wish!
Virtues Matter: https://www.virtuesmatter.com/app
I don't make a dime sharing them - I just think they are cool!
Hello, my friend. Thank you for being here. Welcome to the Superglue podcast. You, like me, are the superglue to so many and so much. You’re a fellow supergluer. Supergluer - a person who holds it all together. You are carrying a heavy load. You’re not going to stop being the superglue. And I get it. You don’t want to stop. But a little balance. A break. A breather. Sources of strength are important. And I hope that’s why you’re here.
**Mission: Here we get real, share a morning prayer, and gear up for a kick-ass day.
In this episode we talk about friendliness, friendship and the importance of both for those of us who are the superglue to so many!**
Correction: My friend Dara did not "start" the Virtues Project but she and her husband started "Virtues Matter" and their cool app is called - "Virtues Cards" - enjoy!
Music by: Happy Life by FREDJI https://soundcloud.com/fredjimusic https://www.facebook.com/fredjimusic/ Music promoted by Audio Library https://youtu.be/u4PI5p5bI9k