blurred thoughts.: Recent Episodes
azri and stephanie
Funny how we started this podcast in lockdown and its only timely to reminisce and ask ourselves, do we actually miss lockdown?
We tried to lighten up the mood on here by chatting to you about our dreams, big, small, unrealistic. It got a little tough but hey, happy listening!
What better way to commemorate our 50th episode than dig deep into our wounds, heh. Inspired by an Instagram post by @your.relationship.reset, we look through 20 things that we've normalised in our lives but is in fact, remnants or drivers of childhood emotional trauma. Expect sobbing, delirium, moments of silence - it's like a live therapy session without a licensed therapist.
Experiencing mid-life / quarter-life or just life crisis? Here's us musing about human existence or us as two humans existing on earth. Why do we exist? What is life really? What is the purpose of life? What is the point of our existence? Do we just get on with life? Why do some of us yearn and fight to do more than we need to?
We're back with a new series - off the cuff, impromptu musings about life where we get on the phone and chat about something that's been on our minds, like we usually do in our chats. We've noticed many of our friends around us aren't quite happy or satisfied with life. What does satisfaction mean anyway? Why are we not satisfied? Are any of us actually satisfied?
You know the long list of world problems we have - do we really no solution, or are we too lazy to act on solutions we have? What's stopping us from implementing some of the research and science that has been ongoing to solve these problems? Money? Pride? Nonchalance? Or does it really come down to laziness?
The metrics of success by today's society is usually revolving money, fame and success. It is rare to hear about empathy, morals or character being something of importance. The pandemic has made this question even more pertinent; as more people struggle with feelings of loneliness and despair, the scorn that such individuals face from those around them for struggling with their mental health is heartbreaking. Where or when did human society leave behind our moral compass? Can we regain it, and quickly?
I promise to love you, in sickness, and in health, as long as I still draw breath. These are among some of the common matrimonial vows we hear at many wedding ceremonies. However, is it really possible to love another person unconditionally? Of course, we all dream of that old-fashioned romance, the one that gives us butterflies and leaves us feeling giddy and flushed. But what if two people end up realising that they're too different, that they want different things.. can they still love each other unconditionally?
On paper, gyms sound really useful - you are able to head to a venue with cutting-edge machinery designed to strengthen and hone your physique. However, is it possible that these places are somewhat toxic? We've all heard the stories, haven't we? Tales of friends who were sneered at because they didn't fit a certain physique, or how there would be gatekeepers that would prevent the average person from trying the more challenging machinery. Is there merit behind these claims, or are we reading too much into it?
We all know that physical fitness is important - research shows walking 5 km a week can reduce the risk of various diseases (including cancer) by almost 70%. But, when you look around, you start to wonder if people are really wanting to reduce their risk or use their gym memberships and hot yoga sessions as status symbols; something to flaunt on social media, to give credence to their success, societal standing and financial capabilities. And it's not just today - back in the 90s having a treadmill at home was THE thing. Is there a way we can change our perspective on physical fitness? Find out more in this episode!
When are you getting married? Oh, when are you going to give me grandkids? The nightmare of every major family gathering or social event. Is having children a basic tenet of human society? Is it encoded in our genetics? We argue that while the basic premise is to live beyond our live; which means to say passing down our knowledge, skills and values to a new generation, we look at the ideas of adoption, or showing care and concern for all children of society, whether we are related by blood, or not.
The apple doesn't fall far from the tree - that's the adage we've all heard from time to time. How much of this is true? How much can we accept that the nature of a person is intrinsic and very little can be done to change the future outcomes of a person, or can we also argue that the concept of nurturing someone can help turn the tides in our favour. We also look at a phrase we tend to forget: that everyone is inherently good at our core.
Human society relies on the enforcement and implementation of certain rights and laws to ensure a stable and functional community. However, there are times when laws come into question; are they fair and more importantly, consistent. While we admit that there is no utopian society in which all laws are constructed perfectly, there can be much to be said about the consistency of the enforcement of laws in today's criminal justice systems.
Azri said he wanted to be rich like a billionaire. Steph told him he's too nice to ever be one - begging the question, can billionaires ever be ethical? Who wins this battle? Listen now.
Do humans care more about animals than other humans? We are not denying that animals deserve the right to be protected but we don't often see the same passion to fight for exploited humans as you do for animal cruelty, do we? We try and make sense of all that in this week's episode!
Game Show: Dealbreakers in Relationships! In our first ever "trivia-based game show" episode, we sit down and throw scenarios for the other person, where he or she has to decide which is the dealbreaker in a relationship. Nothing is off-limits; we put our cards on the table - questions on bad breath, poor sex drive, and religious beliefs are all challenged!
In this episode, we discuss the challenges of education systems and the benefits of courses and degrees we each pursue, in ensuring that we are gainfully employed in the future. What do school rankings really mean? Are the rich just better placed for better education and better futures? A warning might be wise: Azri is incredibly salty in this episode!
We're back! We discuss a bit of our unprecedentedly long hiatus before delving into something we'd never thought we'd discuss: ASTROLOGY! Love it or hate it, you have to admit, that horoscopes, daily predictions and love forecasts are rather common in the media today. But behind it all, isn't it just another path for us to find solace, a reason to hold on to, and peace of mind?
Cancel culture has been rising in popularity in the media. Some of it, proponents argue: "it's about time!". On the other hand, there have been instances of cancellation that makes us wonder if it was justified or if it was a hurried decision. Furthermore, what is current in media seems to play a role in whether a show or a person is cancelled; a popular celebrity who is known for abuse continues to publish new work because they make the dough continue to roll in. How do we determine what is right and wrong? Are there instances where cancel culture has taken on an almost blind, hive-like mentality?
We live in a society where we're told that we will find someone, we will find love - that's the constant narrative in the media, in films, in books, in everyday conversation. But there are some of us who've never been in love, who may never find love but no one talks about that because for some reason it's somewhat unheard of and potentially scary. This is not us being bitter about being single but asking the questions no one wants to answer or knows the answers to.
This isn't a dig at God, or religion but the way religion is taught and preached. We discuss concepts of heaven and hell, what you are told to do and not to do, how God is loving but is also capable of punishment and judgement. Are these just social constructs? All in this weeks episode!
From popping a painkiller to cancer treatment, abortion, euthanasia, hormone therapy - at what point does modern medicine start playing god? Is extending life playing god? If hormone therapy is playing god, would conversion therapy be playing god? All in this heated episode!
Clinical trials. They are important but are they perfect? When we look closer, they seem to be biased and racially skewed. Not to mention, Western medicine seems to have an inferior view of traditional remedies and cures, some of which can be argued to be even more effective than over-the-counter pills and topical creams. Can Western medicine find symbiosis with other schools of cures? Find out in this episode!
As long as there have been vaccines, there have been people who objected to them. But, this pandemic has been the first time where the science behind vaccines, pharmaceutical companies behind vaccines have become part of public conversation - raising more questions and concerns. As science students, it's easy for us to get angry at vaccine hesitancy and anti-vaxxers. But shaming or forcing people to accept your point of view is never a good idea. In this episode, we step into the shoes of an anti-vaxxer and look at where these concerns and hesitation might come from and try to alleviate them.
Toxicity or monotony? Is someone taking charge, or are they becoming too lackadaisical in the relationship? Are there ways to address such matters so that we can have a healthy and sustainable relationship for the long haul? In this day and age, where problems seem to be in complex, relationship amateurs-turned-experts @miskalazri and @thechroniccynic try to expound upon such problems and discuss possible solutions to help you have a healthy, happy and romantic relationship.
Dating, especially online dating, is very commonplace and seems to be the only way people search for love, companionship etc. But are people really looking for love or just a temporary fix? Are we looking to escape our issues or fill a void? We share our two cents in this episode.
We've talked about good and bad, the beautiful and ugly about parents, siblings and everything in between. However, we (and hardly anyone else) discussed boundaries in families. Why is it important? How can we have healthy relationships with the nearest and dearest (and those who are as alien as a foreign species) without completely losing our sanity?
From your favourite restaurants, to the most beautiful resorts. we are indebted to the service and hospitality personnel who allow these sectors to prosper and thrive. Especially today in this world of CoVid, we are ever more reliant on such individuals for keeping our cities and countries clean. However, it doesn't stop the labelling and condescension that comes from society that often sees them as of a "lower-class". Why is this? Can we change the dialogue around service and hospitality?
They're the ones right next to us, yet they can sometimes feel like complete strangers. What is this invisible force that separate us from having genuine ties with those we call our neighbours? Besides fostering a healthy relationship, are there other benefits to cultivating strong ties with thy neighbour? ALSO: a secret challenge to Stephanie! Listen to find out more!
For some of us, work is a dreadful. For the rest of us, work is an enjoyable experience. The way we feel about work can be mostly attributed to our managers, bosses and colleagues. What are the different types of colleague relationships? How do they add value or hinder us? Where do we draw the line between climbing the corporate ladder and producing work that matters? Find out in this week's episode.
We all hope that friendships are straight-forward and simple to understand. Unfortunately, the reality is that, friendships are complex and unique. There's never a one-size-fits-all manual to allow individuals to navigate the labyrinth of friendships. Should we only have a singular best friend? Where do we draw the lines between being there for a friend, and being taken advantage of by Mr and Ms Fairweathers? This episode breaks it all down, to the best of our knowledge, scanty experience and unfiltered conversations.
Is applying sunblock feminine, or just a man being conscious of skin cancer? What about manicures such as French tips? Is there a line to be drawn where someone is taking care of himself, or is he being feminine? Can we establish a difference between self-care or vanity? There are so many questions and as always, blurred arguments for each of them. In this ultimate episode of season 3, we discuss what's girly and what's not.
Since birth, we've been exposed to a stereotyped definition of what a boy and girl is whether we consciously want believe that or not. In this episode, we discuss our experiences and share how we can start to dispel some of these gender-based expectations of behaviour, roles and identity.
Are men scared to love? Or scared of love? Or just scared to express love? We chat from experience and may have almost cracked the code to male psychology. Enjoy listening to this episode!
In this episode, we break down male friendships. We discuss the dynamics between straight male friends, straight and gay male friends, male and female friendships and the challenges we see in day to day life. Does building a deep, intimate friendship come with maturity? How can boys be more open and bold about their intentions and feelings with friends?
"Be a man!" can be thrown around quite easily. In this episode, we discuss what a "man" could be from our perspective - everything from body hair to personality.
We hear this all the time, "boys will be boys". It's often said as a matter of fact but does it influence the way boys and men behave and excuse themselves for poor beahviour? What does this mean for girls and women? Does it have a negative impact on how boys identify? Does it pigeonhole masculine identity? All in this week's episode!
Trigger Warning: Content might include mention of suicide, depression and self-harm. How hard is the expression of emotion when you're a male? What causes such a biased and polarising conversation when males are asked about their emotions? Can we do better when this behaviour is so deeply entrenched within society? In this episode, Stephanie probes Azri on how his opinion on this matter shaped his writing in his book, Ring of Promise.
In our final episode this season, we dive into our ethnic or cultural identity crises and issues growing up and how we've come to a sense of self with who we are and where we're from. Why do we grow up rejecting parts of cultural identity? Is having no sense of belonging a part of your identity? Wh at made us start accepting facets of our cultural identity?
Let's be real, all of us feel lost, for most of our lives. How do we maintain the resilience to find our way? What can we do when we life feels hopeless or purposeless? Azri and Stephanie reflect on our personal lives and share how we can overcome our fears and anxieties.
Everyday we are exposed to the news and media about all of world's problems - racism, poverty, pollution, the environment, gender inequality, the list is endless. It can get overwhelming to a point where we become apathetic, and fatigued. Do we stop caring? Can we fight all of world's problems? What do we do about people who continue to be ignorant? We share our thoughts in this episode.
We've grown up being taught how to behave based upon our assigned sex - tough boys and caring girls. These stereotypes are engrained in us from a young age and many of us struggle to fit in with or meet society's expectations of them. How does this pressure impact our career choices? How does this impact the way men and women are treated at the workplace? How do these biases influence healthcare approaches? All in today's episode.
In this episode, we share our observations and experiences growing up in religious families and communities where we've seen religious guilt dictating actions and driving blame culture - misconstruing the true meaning of religion. At the same time, we also discuss the flipside of feeling guilty of being religious when non-believers shame you because of your religious beliefs. What do we do when religious guilt stops us from making our own life choices? How does that affect mental health and well-being?
In today's society, it seems that everyone is fervently following trends. From Black Lives Matter to Me Too movement, from ALS ice bucket challenges to everything in between, it seems to be on fire for a period of time, and then the fire and passion seems to ebb away. Why is that? Is it a lack of conviction or commitment? Is it the fear of missing out on the "prime" movement of that very moment? We explore our thoughts and ideas on activism, what we are personally involved in and how people can be instrumental individuals of change starting today!
While children are inherently indebted to their parents for guidance, love and support, can parents be placed on a pedestal without ever being held accountable for their actions? Parents, especially those within the Asian context, are often guilty for questionable decisions and actions - placing high expectations on academic excellence, career choices while slamming choices deemed undesirable to them. Then, there's a whole darker side of parenting, where name calling, guilt tripping, and blackmailing becomes a norm to get their children to toe the line. Be warned, this is an emotional episode for the two hosts.
With the world grieving over the death of George Floyd, many have taken to the streets to protest for racial equality. Many people are speaking out for change. However, why has the needle remain stagnant despite this being a prevalent issue for decades? How can we do more? Is the individual capable of inciting fundamental change? Azri and Stephanie dole out their unfettered opinions.
So many are inherently guilty of looking down at migrant workers, never once giving them credit for the integral tasks that they perform in keeping society and community running smoothly. From keeping the streets clean, maintaining miles and miles of water and sewerage pipes to playing a critical role in being the frontline workers in the healthcare industry. How have we gotten to this point? In our most charged episode to date, we expound two articles that have gone viral in Singapore, albeit for different reasons.
It's only human and natural to compare our lives to others, and sometimes we get jealous. But sometimes, it can consume our lives negatively. The quarantine may have perpetuated feelings of envy when we start seeing more of our friends, family, acquaintances share their alleged luxurious lives on social media - #isolationenvy. How can we free ourselves from the poisonous clutches of envy? Can we celebrate the joy of those around us without being bound envy? We speak from personal experience in this episode
The COVID-19 pandemic has been a difficult time for all of us but we cannot deny the positive changes we've seen during this trying time. In this episode, we discuss the possibilities of reversing damaging impacts we as a community have inflicted on mother nature. Should we as a community take this time to reflect and start making small changes to our consumption habits? Do we have the power to influence change on corporations driven by profit vs the environment?
The current climate has brought to light both the beauty of the human spirit and the darkness within. Should we allow greed to eclipse the challenges and needs of those at risk or who are in desperate need of help? Where do we draw the line between need and greed? Can we find hope in the human spirit during this time of crisis? We break it down in this episode; nothing is off-limits and we tackle political, social and even racial issues.
You know it, we know it: when you saw our episode title "lust", you were expecting topics that would make you blush and look over your shoulder to make sure no one was looking at your phone or computer screen. Imagine the sheer disappointment on your faces when we talked about children and grandparents! So today is the sizzling accompaniment to make even the most brash amongst you blush to the roots of your hair! Enjoy!
When we think of lust, it conjures imagery of tangled bodies, writhing in pleasure. However, we wanted to explore the most basic of human needs; touch. Is it just about physical contact? Can we be sated by the virtual forms of communication that we have today in light of coronavirus?
Welcome to the first episode of blurred thoughts by Azri & Steph, coming to you from Singapore and London.
We’re both in lockdown and what better time to be pensive about the world. This is a series of 7 deadly sins in the time of coronavirus - deconstructing perspectives and shining some hope and positivity during this time.
Today’s deadly sin is Sloth - we’re all coping with this situation differently and are straddling between corona-inspired productivity and corona-activated laziness and here's our two cents.