Team Us: Recent Episodes
LifeAudio
The best marriages have a teamwork mentality. Spouses serve each other, support each other, and celebrate each other. They tackle life together, and when one slips, the other gives grace. Husbands and wives can be vulnerable with each other because they know they rise and fall as one.
Do you want a marriage like this? On each episode of the Team Us Podcast, married couple Ted and Ashleigh Slater come alongside you and your spouse as friends and mentors. They talk openly, honestly, and humorously about the betters and the worsts of their marriage, sharing how grace, commitment, cooperation, and lots of laughter have kept them united over the years.
Whether you’re newly married and desire to build a strong foundation, or you’ve been married longer and your relationship needs a little TLC, you’ll gain practical, realistic ideas for strengthening your Team Us.
In this best-of episode, we discuss the idea of a "soulmate" as a myth that has been around for thousands of years. It may seem like a concept only for non-married people looking for “the one.” But here’s the thing. If you are married and subscribe to this idea of soulmates, it can be harmful to your marriage. Listen in as we share why!
TAKE THE “US TIME” CHALLENGE
Make a list of other marriage myths and reflect on whether they are impacting your marriage. If so, how can you replace them with truth?
LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK
Did you enjoy this episode? Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts! (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/team-us/id1565819107)
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- “Why people still believe in the soulmate myth” by Katie Bishop at BBC (https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20220204-why-people-still-believe-in-the-soulmate-myth)
- “For as Long as Our Love Shall Last: How the Soulmate Myth Makes Marriage Less Stable and Less Happy” by Brad Wilcox (https://ifstudies.org/blog/for-as-long-as-our-love-shall-last-how-the-soulmate-myth-makes-marriage-less-stable-and-less-happy)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Most marriages don’t fall apart in one big moment. They drift slowly and quietly, often without either person noticing. You can share a house, a life, and a schedule and still end up on relational autopilot.
In this episode, we talk about why connection fades over time and share three simple rhythms that help couples stay emotionally close—not through big gestures, but through small, intentional patterns that gently change the direction of a marriage.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE
- Why most marriages drift into autopilot without either person realizing it
- Three simple rhythms that keep a marriage emotionally connected long-term
- How small, intentional patterns quietly change the direction of your relationship
KEY TAKEAWAYS
- Marriages change by direction, not by moments. Small patterns shape where you end up.
- Connection must be built on purpose and maintained through every season.
- Repair and emotional openness matter more than perfect communication.
US TIME CHALLENGE
This week, talk honestly about whether you’re drifting into autopilot in any area of your marriage, then choose one small shared connection ritual to add. It doesn’t have to be big or impressive. Something simple and intentional is enough. The point isn’t the activity. The point is choosing each other on purpose.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to subscribe to Ashleigh’s weekly email newsletter at AshleighSlater.com.
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
In this episode, we’re talking about adaptability and flexibility in marriage. We discuss those everyday moments when staying open and teachable really matter. It’s not just our big decisions, but our small, ordinary interactions that shape how we live life together. Listen in as we explore what psychological flexibility looks like in marriage and how growing in this area can create more peace, safety, and connection over time.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE
- What psychological flexibility is and why it matters in marriage
- Why everyday moments—not just big decisions—often create the most tension
- Common roadblocks to flexibility, including control, rigidity, and shutdown
- How inflexibility affects emotional safety and connection over time
- Practical ways to practice flexibility without losing yourself
- How awareness creates space for better choices in marriage
KEY TAKEAWAYS
- Psychological flexibility isn’t about being passive or agreeable—it’s about staying open and grounded.
- Inflexibility often shows up as shutdown, control, or resistance rather than overt conflict.
- Small, everyday interactions shape the emotional climate of a marriage.
- Control can feel like safety, but it often comes from fear.
- Awareness doesn’t fix everything, but it does create space for healthier responses.
US TIME CHALLENGE
This week, each of you choose one small area where you’ll intentionally practice flexibility. It might be listening without defending, staying open to a different preference, or pausing instead of shutting down.
At the end of the week, talk about what you noticed—not what you accomplished. The goal isn’t to “do it right,” but to build awareness and connection.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to subscribe so you never miss what’s next. And we’d love to hear from you! What’s one way you want to be more open and teachable in your marriage. Share it with us on social media or send us a message at AshleighSlater.com.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- “What Is Psychological Flexibility?” from the University of Rochester Medical Center (https://www.urmc.rochester.edu/behavioral-health-partners/bhp-blog/april-2020/what-is-psychological-flexibility.aspx)
- “Psychological Flexibility in Marriage” from Focus on the Family (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/psychological-flexibility-in-marriage/)
- “How Psychological Flexibility Strengthens Relationships” from Marriage.com (https://www.marriage.com/advice/relationship/psychological-flexibility-in-relationships/)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
How do you and your spouse tackle everyday conflicts? In today's best-of episode from our archives, we share three of our favorite tools for working through those smaller disagreements or disputes.
TAKE THE "US TIME" CHALLENGE
Pick one of the tools we shared to try this week when you face conflict with your spouse.
LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK
Did you enjoy this episode? Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts! (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/team-us/id1565819107)
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
In this best-of episode from our archives, we’re talking about how you can team up not just for the new year, but for every minute, hour, day, week, and month of the year! Listen in as we share three practical ways you can walk in unity. We also talk about spiritual warfare in marriage, what that might look like, and share thoughts on how to navigate it hand-in-hand.
Take the "Us Time" Challenge
Pick one of today’s ways to team up and try it this week.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- “Is This a Spiritual Attack, or Is My Spouse Just a Jerk?” (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/is-this-a-spiritual-attack-or-is-my-spouse-just-a-jerk/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
We don't have to be Scrooges to benefit from reflecting on Christmas past, present, and future. In this episode from our archives, we talk about how looking back, living now, and planning ahead together can enrich our marriages.
TAKE THE "US TIME" CHALLENGE
If you’ve been married five years or more, practice nostalgia with your spouse. Ask each other about your favorite Christmas you’ve spent together and why it stands out to you. If you have been married less than five years, plan ahead on where you want to be relationally next Christmas.
LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK
Did you enjoy this episode? Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts! (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/team-us/id1565819107)
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- “Here’s why there used to be so many Christmas Day weddings” by Daisy Goddard at Find My Past (https://www.findmypast.co.uk/blog/discoveries/christmas-day-weddings)
- “How Christmas Memories Can Enrich Your Life” by Mark D. Roberts at Fuller De Pree Center (https://depree.org/de-pree-journal/how-christmas-memories-can-enrich-your-life/)
- “’Tis the Season for Nostalgia: Holiday Reminiscing Can Have Psychological Benefits” at APA.org (https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2011/12/nostalgia)
- “Look Ahead to Strengthen Your Relationship” by Barton Goldsmith Ph.D. at Psychology Today (https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/emotional-fitness/201310/look-ahead-strengthen-your-relationship)
- “What Is Active Listening?” by Amy Gallo at Harvard Business Review (https://hbr.org/2024/01/what-is-active-listening)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
In this episode, we explore the surprisingly powerful world of micro-habits—those tiny actions that take less than five minutes but, when repeated, create meaningful and lasting change in your marriage. From simple daily rituals to small moments of gratitude to chore-based love notes, you’ll discover how small things practiced often can strengthen connection, build warmth, and shape the overall direction of your relationship.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE
- What micro-habits are and why researchers say they matter
- How 1% improvements compound into significant transformation over time
- Why micro-moments help keep couples from slipping into “roommate mode”
- Three daily micro-habits that build connection, gratitude, and emotional safety
- Practical examples of how we use these habits in our own marriage
KEY TAKEAWAYS
- Small habits practiced consistently create meaningful change over time.
- Micro-moments protect connection and help couples avoid “roommate mode.”
- Specific gratitude (“Thank you for…”) shifts focus toward what’s working.
- Everyday chores can become tangible expressions of love.
- Simple rituals—like hello, goodbye, and goodnight kisses—strengthen emotional and physical connection.
US TIME CHALLENGE
Choose one micro-habit and practice it every day this week. It can be one of the three we shared or be a micro-moment unique to your relationship. Consistency is the goal, not size. Let the small thing do its quiet, steady work.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
- Follow Ashleigh: Instagram @teamuspodcast | Facebook @ashleighslaterauthor
- Subscribe to Team Us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen so you don’t miss an episode.
- Join our community: Get updates, resources, and encouragement for your marriage by signing up for Ashleigh’s weekly email newsletter at AshleighSlater.com.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones by James Clear (https://a.co/d/9kNsP4L)
- “5 Micro-Moments That Predict the Health of Your Marriage” by Shlomo and Rivka Slatkin at the Marriage Restoration Project (https://themarriagerestorationproject.com/5-micro-moments-that-predict-the-health-of-your-marriage/)
- “The Art of Micro-Routines: How 5-Minute Habits Can Transform Your Day” by Glossy Magazine (https://theglossymagazine.com/the-art-of-micro-routines-how-5-minute-habits-can-transform-your-day/)
- “12 Micro Moves for Your Marriage” by Ted Lowe (https://allprodad.com/12-micro-moves-for-your-marriage/)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
In a previous episode, we talked about the power of saying, “I’m sorry.” Today, we’re taking the next step and diving into forgiveness, specifically, what it looks like to forgive our spouse. Forgiveness isn’t always easy, but it’s one of the most powerful ways to strengthen a marriage. In this episode, we explore what forgiveness really is (and isn’t), why it’s vital for lasting love, and how practicing it can lead to healing, trust, and deeper connection.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE
- Why forgiveness plays such a big role in happy, lasting marriages
- What forgiveness truly means from both a biblical and relational perspective
- Three things forgiveness is not and why those distinctions matter
- How to navigate the process of forgiving when it still hurts
- Practical ways to rebuild trust after forgiveness
- How to think like a forgiving person and create a culture of grace in your marriage
KEY TAKEAWAYS
- Forgiveness is a process, not a one-time decision.
- Forgiveness doesn’t erase responsibility or instantly restore trust.
- Choosing to forgive frees your heart from bitterness and opens space for connection.
- Repair—not just resolution—is what rebuilds intimacy after conflict.
- Thinking like a forgiver starts by asking God to help you see your spouse through His eyes.
US TIME CHALLENGE
This week’s challenge is to think about how you think. When your spouse does something that frustrates or hurts you, pause and ask yourself: Am I thinking like a forgiver or like a victim? Invite God to reshape your thoughts, helping you move toward grace and understanding.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
- Follow Ashleigh: Instagram @teamuspodcast | Facebook @ashleighslaterauthor
- Subscribe to Team Us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen so you don’t miss an episode.
- Join our community: Get updates, resources, and encouragement for your marriage by signing up for Ashleigh’s weekly email newsletter at AshleighSlater.com.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- “How Forgiveness Can Transform Your Marriage” by the Gottman Institute (https://www.gottman.com/blog/forgiveness-can-transform-marriage/)
- “Real Answers to Real Relationship Questions” from Chad Moore at Sun Valley Community Church (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=exzwsCITlVM)
- “What the Bible Really Says About Love” from Chad Moore at Sun Valley Community Church (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQSMJWhRNFo)
- “What forgiveness is not: 5 common misconceptions” by Laura Petherbridge (https://www.focusonthefamily.ca/content/what-forgiveness-is-not-5-common-misconceptions)
- “The Art of Repair: Transforming Conflict Into Closeness” by Greg Smalley (https://www.klove.com/resources/life/the-art-of-repair-transforming-conflict-into-closeness-11585)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
The holidays can sometimes feel overwhelming. Between all of the shopping, decorating, and events, it’s easy for us as couples to stay busy without really connecting. In this episode, we share ten fun and affordable holiday date ideas to help you slow down, laugh together, and enjoy the season as a team. You’ll hear creative ways to make time for each other and find joy in everyday moments.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
- The holidays don’t have to be stressful or expensive to be meaningful.
- Simple, shared experiences can bring you closer together.
- Making time for each other is one of the best gifts you can give this season.
US TIME CHALLENGE
Come up with a holiday date idea of your own—something simple that fits you as a couple—and make it happen. Then share it with us at AshleighSlater.com or on social media! We’d love to hear how you’re making time for each other this Christmas.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
- Follow Ashleigh: Instagram @teamuspodcast | Facebook @ashleighslaterauthor
- Subscribe to Team Us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen so you don’t miss an episode.
- Join our community: Get updates, resources, and encouragement for your marriage by signing up for Ashleigh’s weekly email newsletter at AshleighSlater.com.
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
In this fun episode, we share creative and meaningful conversation starters to help you reconnect with your spouse, especially if you feel like you’ve run out of things to say. Whether you’re on a date night, taking a walk, or driving somewhere together, these questions will help you laugh, learn, and rediscover each other.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:
- Why it’s normal for couples to occasionally run out of things to say
- How conversation starters can spark fun, meaningful connection
- A mix of lighthearted and relationship-focused questions to ask your spouse
- How laughter and curiosity keep your marriage conversations fresh
KEY TAKEAWAYS
- Playful conversation matters. Asking silly, imaginative questions helps you reconnect through fun and laughter.
- Curiosity strengthens connection. When you keep learning about each other, you keep growing together.
- Intentionality counts. Don’t wait for deep conversation to “just happen.” Plan for it by bringing a few questions along on your next date.
CONVERSATION STARTERS WE ANSWER
- If you could have any job, whether serious or silly, and money was not a factor, what would it be?
- If time travel existed, when and where would you like to visit first?
- Who are three famous people, dead or alive, you would want to have lunch with?
- If you could only listen to two albums for the rest of your life, which ones would you choose, and why?
- What do you think our biggest strength as a couple is? What about our biggest weakness?
- What’s a "little thing" in our relationship that you really love?
- If our life was a reality TV series, what do you think would be the most appropriate title?
- What is one date we have not done you would like to do?
US TIME CHALLENGE
Print out a list of conversation starters and take them with you on your next date night, walk, or long drive. Make it fun by taking turns picking questions, and let the conversation go wherever it leads. You might just discover something new about each other!
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
Stay connected with us beyond the show! Visit AshleighSlater.com for free marriage tools, updates on new podcast episodes, and to sign up for her weekly email newsletter.
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- “93 Meaningful Conversation Starters & Questions for Couples to Better Connect,” The Adventure Challenge, https://www.theadventurechallenge.com/blogs/news/conversation-starters-for-couples/
- “260 Free Printable Conversation Starters for Couples,” WinShape Marriage, https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/conversation-starters-for-date-night/
- Bedtime Prayers: Lullabies and Peaceful Worship by Twila Paris (https://amzn.to/4gf4aj5)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
In this conversation, we talk about how to face the holidays as a united team rather than letting stress, schedules, or family expectations pull you apart. From setting shared expectations to finding ways to serve and dream together, these five simple principles can help you approach the season hand-in-hand, not back-to-back.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:
- How to set holiday expectations as a couple so you stay on the same page
- Ways to make time for each other amid the busyness of family gatherings and events
- How serving together can deepen your bond and create meaningful shared memories
- The value of dreaming together before the new year begins
- How to handle conflict with a "we vs. the problem" attitude
KEY TAKEAWAYS
- Set expectations together. Talk about what kind of holiday season you both want — simple or busy, quiet or full of tradition — before the stress hits.
- Spend dedicated time together. Guard your connection by scheduling couple time in advance, even if it means celebrating a little differently.
- Serve others together. Volunteering or giving as a team strengthens your unity and creates shared purpose.
- Dream together. Use the season to look ahead, set goals, and imagine what’s next for your marriage and family.
- Face conflict together. When disagreements arise, remember you’re on the same team and approach conflict as us against the problem, not me vs. you.
US TIME CHALLENGE
Sit down together and set your holiday expectations as a couple. Talk about what you both want this season to look like — from traditions and travel to budgets and downtime — and then make a plan to help make that vision happen.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
Stay connected with us beyond the show! Visit AshleighSlater.com for free marriage tools, updates on new podcast episodes, and to sign up for my weekly email newsletter.
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
In this conversation, we talk about what it means to “leave and cleave” in marriage and how getting married calls you to realign your loyalties and priorities. We share three ways we’ve learned to live out this principle, and we hope it encourages you to keep choosing your spouse first.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:
- The biblical meaning behind the phrase “leave and cleave”
- Why “leaving and cleaving” is harder in practice than in theory
- How redefining “immediate family” strengthens your marriage
- Three practical ways to prioritize your spouse over extended family
- Why involving parents or siblings in marital conflict can create unnecessary strain
KEY TAKEAWAYS
- Give your spouse priority over parents and siblings. Your marriage becomes your new “immediate family.” While it’s still important to love and honor your parents, your primary loyalty now belongs to your spouse.
- Determine to make decisions together first. Going to your spouse before seeking outside input builds trust, unity, and interdependence. It shows that your spouse’s thoughts and feelings come first.
- Decide not to involve extended family in marital conflict. Unless you’re dealing with abuse or serious issues, resolve everyday disagreements privately. Inviting family into routine conflict can damage relationships and make reconciliation harder.
US TIME CHALLENGE
Write down one specific area where you struggle to “leave and cleave.” Share it with your spouse and discuss whether they see it the same way. Then, together, brainstorm two or three practical ways you can improve in that area this week.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
Stay connected with us beyond the show! Visit AshleighSlater.com for free marriage tools, updates on new podcast episodes, and to sign up for her weekly email newsletter.
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Ever said "I'm sorry" just to move on? You're not alone. In this episode, we’re talking about how to apologize in a way that actually heals and not just hushes the hurt. We'll share what experts say about why it's so hard to say sorry, what makes an apology sincere, and how humility can transform even the most awkward moments into deeper connection.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE
- Why apologizing feels so difficult (and what’s really behind it)
- How to make "I'm sorry" more than just words
- The difference between regret and a true apology
- What humility has to do with healing and reconciliation
- A practical, faith-based process for rebuilding trust after hurt
KEY TAKEAWAYS
- Real apologies focus on the other person's pain, not our own discomfort.
- Humility is the foundation of every meaningful apology.
- "I'm sorry if…" or "I'm sorry but…" aren't true apologies—they're defenses.
- Taking responsibility rebuilds connection faster than explaining your intent.
- A sincere apology requires empathy, ownership, and change.
US TIME CHALLENGE
Look back at your most recent apologies. Were they centered on your own feelings or your spouse's experience? This week, practice making your next "I'm sorry" one that reflects humility, empathy, and love.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to subscribe to Ashleigh's weekly e-newsletter at AshleighSlater.com, so you never miss what's next.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- “Study: The states that apologize the most” by Matt Zajechowski
- “Why is it so hard to apologize?” TedX Talk by Michael Ballard
- “Why Sorry Seems to Be the Hardest Word” by F. Diane Barth
- Sorry, Sorry, Sorry: The Case for Good Apologies by Marjorie Ingall and Susan McCarthy
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Ever sit down for date night and realize you’re both scrolling instead of talking? You’re not alone. In this episode, we tackle the challenge of “technoference,” or when screens quietly slip between you and your spouse.
For couples who can’t just unplug completely—because, for some of us, “off the clock” isn’t really a thing—we share three simple, memorable ways to protect your marriage time from digital noise. From quick phone checks that don’t spiral into scrolls, to turning toward each other when it matters most, this episode offers practical steps to keep your connection strong, even in a screen-saturated world.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:
- What “technoference” means and how it quietly affects relationships
- Why “just turn it off” doesn’t always work for busy couples
- Practical steps to handle screens with purpose instead of guilt
- Three simple, memorable habits for protecting your marriage time
KEY TAKEAWAYS
- Veni, Vidi, Vici — “I came, I saw, I conquered”: Take care of the urgent task quickly, then turn back toward your spouse.
- Stop, Look, Listen: Pause before reaching for your phone. Notice your moment and your marriage.
- Ready, Steady, Go: When your spouse bids for attention, get ready to respond, steady yourself to act, and then go by giving them your full focus.
US TIME CHALLENGE
This week, try one of these three ideas. Maybe it’s setting down your phone mid-scroll, conquering that quick work text and returning fast, or intentionally turning toward your spouse when they reach out. Small shifts can make a big difference in how connected you feel.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to subscribe so you never miss what’s next. And we’d love to hear from you! Which of these takeaways do you need most? Share it with us on social media or send us a message at AshleighSlater.com.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood Is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness by Jonathan Haidt (https://a.co/d/a1rrbEA)
- “Technology Tips and Traps in Your Relationship” by Kailee Hansen and David Schramm (https://extension.usu.edu/relationships/research/technology-tips-and-traps-in-your-relationship)
- The Big-Baby Pivot from How to Talk So Your Spouse Feels Seen and Heard {Episode 101} (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us-podcast-episode-101/)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Ever feel like you and your spouse are talking but not really connecting? You’re saying words, but they’re not landing. We’ve all been there.
In this episode, we share five simple communication techniques—adapted from How to Talk to Anyone by Leil Lowndes—that can help you feel more seen, heard, and understood in marriage. These aren’t gimmicks or manipulative tricks. They’re practical, grace-filled ways to build trust and connection with the person you love most.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:
- Why body language and attention matter more than perfect phrasing
- How to recognize your spouse’s bids for connection and respond well
- What it means to become a “word detective” in your marriage
- Why “thank you for…” is stronger than just “thank you”
- How to use empathy and echoing to make your spouse feel truly heard
KEY TAKEAWAYS
- The Big-Baby Pivot: Turn your full attention toward your spouse when they speak—it communicates value and presence.
- Be a Word Detective: Listen for clues about what interests your spouse, and ask follow-up questions.
- Never the Naked Thank You: Always follow gratitude with for—“Thank you for doing the dishes,” not just “thanks.”
- Echoing: Mirror key words to show empathy and understanding.
- Employ Empathizers: Replace “uh-huh” with thoughtful affirmations like “I see what you mean” or “That makes sense.”
US TIME CHALLENGE
Pick one of the five communication techniques and practice it intentionally. Maybe it’s pivoting toward your spouse when they talk, or saying, “Thank you for…” instead of just “thanks.” Small shifts in how we speak and listen can make a big difference in how connected we feel.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to subscribe so you never miss what’s next. And we’d love to hear from you! Which of the techniques are you going to try first and why? Share it with us on social media or send us a message at AshleighSlater.com.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- “45 Birthday Questions for Yourself and Your Loved Ones” by Abby Tanner (https://www.familysearch.org/en/blog/birthday-questions)
- How to Talk to Anyone: 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships by Leil Lowndes (https://a.co/d/edP59Hc)
- The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages by Shaunti Feldhahn (https://a.co/d/a9FP4Ej)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
It’s our 100th episode! Can you believe it? To celebrate this milestone, we’re sharing ten simple hacks for a stronger, happier marriage.
Over the last four years, we’ve talked about each of these in different episodes, but today we’re pulling them all together in one place. These hacks are doable, encouraging, and designed to bring you closer as a couple.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:
- Hack 1: Think “Us,” Not “Me” — shift from “me” to “we” for unity and teamwork.
- Hack 2: Get on the Same Page — create shared goals and expectations, and keep checking in.
- Hack 3: Dream Together, Stay Together — build connection by pursuing shared dreams.
- Hack 4: Make Rituals Your Super Glue — create traditions that bond you through consistency.
- Hack 5: Show Love with Follow-Through — build trust with small, steady actions.
- Hack 6: Progress Beats Perfection — focus on growth, not flawless performance.
- Hack 7: Stay Flexible to Stay Connected — adapt to life’s curveballs as a team.
- Hack 8: Battle Problems, Not Your Partner — face challenges side by side instead of against each other.
- Hack 9: Turn Conflict into Closeness — lean into conflict with humility and respect to grow stronger.
- Hack 10: Keep Love Playful and Fun — laugh together and flirt often to keep the spark alive.
US TIME CHALLENGE
Choose one hack from the list and practice it together. Whether it’s starting a small ritual, showing follow-through, or sharing a laugh, see how it strengthens your marriage this week.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to subscribe so you never miss what’s next. And we’d love to hear from you! Which hack is your favorite and why? Share it with us on social media or send us a message at AshleighSlater.com.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- “We Can Build This Dream Together” by Erin Smalley (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/dreaming-together-in-marriage/)
- “Ideas for How to Add Fun Back into Your Marriage” by Andrew Linder (https://www.allprodad.com/ideas-for-how-to-add-fun-back-into-your-marriage/)
- “Without flirting, it wouldn’t be a marriage” by Sarah Hunter Murray (https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/myths-desire/201909/without-flirting-it-wouldnt-be-marriage)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
What do Reese’s, raisins, and rekindling romance have in common? More than you might think. In this episode, we kick things off with a lighthearted chat about October candy trends, before diving into something sweeter: three practical ways to keep the spark alive in marriage.
Whether you’ve been married two years or twenty, you’ll walk away with encouragement and simple steps to nurture friendship, show love in everyday gestures, and let go of old hurts.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:
- Why friendship is the foundation of lasting romance
- The power of small, daily gestures to communicate love
- How forgiveness frees couples to move forward together
US TIME CHALLENGE
This week, pick one or two small gestures of love to practice each day.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to subscribe so you never miss what’s next. And we’d love to hear from you! What non-listener do you struggle with being? Share it with us on social media or send us a message at AshleighSlater.com.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- “Tricks, Treats, and Trends: Unwrapping DoorDash’s Sweet Halloween Orders” (https://about.doordash.com/en-us/news/doordash-halloween-order-trends)
- “What Is the Sound Relationship House?” by The Gottman Institute (https://www.gottman.com/blog/what-is-the-sound-relationship-house/)
- Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country’s Foremost Relationship Expert by John M. Gottman, Ph.D. and Nan Silver (https://a.co/d/dz0gtbl)
- “F Is for Friendship” by Zac Brittle (https://www.gottman.com/blog/f-is-for-friendship/)
- “Happy Marriages Are Based on Deep Friendship” by Erin Smalley (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/happy-marriages-are-based-on-deep-friendship/)
- “Do the Little Things That Matter Big Time” by Shaunti Feldhahn (https://shaunti.com/2014/06/highly-happy-marriage-secret-1-little-things/)
- The Relationship Cure: A 5 Step Guide to Strengthening Your Marriage, Family, and Friendships by John M. Gottman, Ph.D. and Joan DeClaire (https://a.co/d/23AvquO)
- “How to Keep a Relationship Alive” by Tony Robbins (https://www.tonyrobbins.com/blog/keeping-the-spark-alive)
- “How to Have Lighthearted Marriage” by Ashleigh Slater (https://ashleighslater.com/lighthearted-marriage/)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Every couple has conflict. But what happens when we let it linger? In this episode, we’re unpacking three reasons unresolved conflict can poison our connection, our home, and our marriage. Plus, we’ll explore how understanding conflict management styles can help us handle disagreements in a healthier way. Because how we handle conflict shapes the kind of connection we share.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:
- The five conflict management styles
- Why lingering conflict prolongs issues rather than solving them
- How unresolved conflict breaks connection and trust between spouses
- The effect lingering conflict has on the atmosphere of your home
- Practical encouragement from Scripture to address conflict with wisdom
US TIME CHALLENGE
This week, reflect on your conflict management style. Which one do you tend to use most often in your marriage? Do you need to make changes so that conflict doesn’t linger and harm your relationship?
ADDITIONAL TEAM US EPISODES WITH TIPS FOR CONFLICT RESOLUTION
- How to Embrace Conflict in Your Marriage as an Adventure, Not a Threat [Episode 5]
- How to Work Together to Resolve Disagreements [Episode 16]
- What to Do When Communication Is Frustrating [Episode 22]
- Why Being Right in Marriage Can Be Wrong [Episode 33]
- How to Respond When Your Spouse Loads the Dishwasher Wrong [Episode 40]
- Why We Go to Bed Mad (And How It’s Helped Our Marriage) [Episode 41]
- 3 Tools for Tackling Everyday Conflicts [Episode 64]
- 3 Ways to Transforms Kitchen Disagreements into Deeper Connection [Episode 91]
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to subscribe so you never miss what’s next. And we’d love to hear from you! What non-listener do you struggle with being? Share it with us on social media or send us a message at AshleighSlater.com.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- “What’s Your Conflict Management Style” by Walden University (https://www.waldenu.edu/news-and-events/walden-news/2017/0530-whats-your-conflict-management-style)
- “The Hidden Dangers of Unresolved Conflict in Relationships: How Couple’s Counseling Can Help” by Kathryn Fayle (https://www.resilient-minded.com/blog/rhz76pn5j59sl2hk7fm0wk0rsbka5d)
- “Conflict in Marriage Does Not Need to Be Destructive” by Jason B. Whitin (https://ifstudies.org/blog/conflict-in-marriage-does-not-need-to-be-destructive)
- “Unresolved Conflict: 4 Consequences of Ignoring Workplace Tension” by Jeremy Pollack (https://pollackpeacebuilding.com/blog/why-ignoring-conflict-within-the-workplace-is-so-detrimental/)
- “The Conversation That Saved My Marriage” by John Delony (https://www.facebook.com/reel/995281745911215)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
We’ve all been a non-listener at times. Maybe it’s been the advice giver, the eternal optimist, the doomsayer, or the one who makes the conversation all about us. The truth is, we all fall into bad listening habits now and then. But here’s the good news: becoming a better listener is possible, and even small shifts can make a big difference in our marriages.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:
- The six types of non-listeners, and why we all slip into them sometimes
- Three practical ways to improve your listening: removing barriers, pausing before you respond, and showing real interest
- How better listening can deepen connection and help your spouse feel truly valued
US TIME CHALLENGE
This week, practice pausing for three seconds—or simply taking a breath—before you respond to your spouse. See how it changes the way you listen and connect.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to subscribe so you never miss what’s next. And we’d love to hear from you! What non-listener do you struggle with being? Share it with us on social media or contact us at AshleighSlater.com.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- “The Five Types of Non-Listeners” by Allison Barron (https://www.boundless.org/blog/the-5-types-of-non-listeners/)
- There Is No Good Card for This: What to Say and Do When Life Is Scary, Awful, and Unfair to People You Love by Kelsey Crowe, Ph.D. and Emily McDowell (https://a.co/d/cSIRtxG)
- “Why Silence Makes Us So Uncomfortable” by Michele Leno, Ph.D. (https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/mind-matters/202502/why-are-we-so-uncomfortable-with-silence)
- “Breathe Before You Speak” by Richard Carlson (https://www.livinglifefully.com/flo/flobebreathebeforeyouspeak.htm)
- “5 Ways to Show You’re Really Listening” by Prepare/Enrich (https://www.prepare-enrich.com/blog/5-ways-to-show-youre-really-listening/)
- “6 Tools for Healthy Communication in Marriage” by Mike Bechtle (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/6-tools-for-healthy-communication-in-marriage/)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Fall doesn’t have to be all about the big, once-a-year events like apple picking, Oktoberfest, or corn mazes that you choose to do together. It can also be about the smaller, weekly things that build connection, create memories, and give your marriage deeper meaning.
In this episode of the Team Us podcast, we share why traditions matter in marriage, how some of the best ones start, and three simple steps you can use to create your own weekly fall traditions as a couple.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:
- The surprising history behind corn mazes and Oktoberfest
- Why Dr. John Gottman says traditions (or “rituals of connection”) matter for couples
- How even haphazard, accidental traditions can become meaningful when nurtured
- Three simple steps to create weekly fall traditions without feeling overwhelmed
- Practical ideas, from cozy movie nights to coffee shop dates, that you can start this week
US TIME CHALLENGE
This week, create one weekly fall tradition with your spouse. Use the three steps from today’s episode to get started and see how it adds connection and meaning to your week.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to subscribe so you never miss what’s next. And we’d love to hear from you! What weekly fall tradition will you try first? Share it with us on social media or send us a message at AshleighSlater.com.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- “The Origin of 25 Fall Traditions” by Stacy Conradt (https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/86478/origins-25-fall-traditions)
- The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John M. Gottman, Ph.D., and Nan Silver (https://a.co/d/fWccp2c)
- “Traditions in Marriage: Setting a New Course” by Laura Schupp (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/traditions-in-marriage-setting-a-new-course/)
- All It Takes Is a Goal by John Acuff (https://a.co/d/3pBz0VC)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
What happens when an early bird marries a night owl? Opposite sleep schedules can make even the strongest marriages feel a little out of sync. But here’s the good news: with a few intentional habits, couples can stay connected, whether one of you is most awake at sunrise and the other at midnight.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:
- Why going to bed at the same time matters (and how to make it happen)
- How to avoid “mismatched talk time” when one of you is chatty and the other isn’t
- Smart ways to protect quality time, even when energy levels peak at different hours
- Practical habits that help early birds and night owls thrive together
US TIME CHALLENGE
This week, pick one shared evening activity to enjoy together. It could be watching a show, playing cards, reading side by side, or taking a walk after dinner. The goal? Build a simple habit of connection, no matter what your schedules look like.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
Want more encouragement and practical tools for your marriage? Sign up for our email newsletter at AshleighSlater.com to get fresh insights, resources, and updates on new episodes delivered straight to your inbox.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- “Rise and shine: the daily routines of history’s most creative minds” by Oliver Burkeman (https://www.theguardian.com/science/2013/oct/05/daily-rituals-creative-minds-mason-currey)
- “Do you have a morning routine? Here’s how some historic figures started their day” by Parissa DJangi (https://www.nationalgeographic.com/history/article/morning-routine-history-marcus-aurelius-ben-franklin)
- “7 Things Night Owls Do that Morning People Will Never Understand” by Melanie Curtin (https://www.inc.com/melanie-curtin/7-things-night-owls-do-that-morning-people-will-never-understand.html)
- “12 Daily Routines of Famous People in History—And What You Should Take from Each” by Brianna Wiest (https://thoughtcatalog.com/brianna-wiest/2015/11/12-daily-routines-of-famous-people-in-history-and-what-you-should-take-from-each/)
- “17 people who prove you don’t have to be a morning person to be successful” by Rachel Gillett (https://www.businessinsider.com/successful-people-who-arent-morning-people-2016-10)
- “There Are 6 Human Chronotypes, Not Just Morning Larks And Night Owls, Study Says” by Peter Dockrill (https://www.sciencealert.com/scientists-say-there-are-6-human-chronotypes-not-just-morning-people-and-night-owls)
- “I’m a Night Owl Married to an Early Bird. Here’s How We Make It Work” by Adam Bulger (https://www.fatherly.com/life/night-owl-early-bird-couples-how-they-adpated)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Life is full of change—new jobs, moves, kids growing up, health challenges. The question isn’t if change will happen, but how we’ll face it together. The good news? Change doesn’t have to push you apart. It can actually bring you closer.
In this episode, we share 3 practical ways to not just handle change, but to embrace it as a couple. You’ll discover:
- How to reframe change as growth so it strengthens your relationship.
- Why it’s vital to create shared meaning together when seasons shift.
- The role of psychological flexibility in navigating the unexpected.
“Us Time” Challenge: Talk through a recent change in your life. Then brainstorm a few intentional ways you can create shared meaning together in the middle of it.
Stay Connected Beyond the Podcast
Want more encouragement and practical tools for your marriage? Sign up for our email newsletter at AshleighSlater.com to get fresh insights, resources, and updates on new episodes delivered straight to your inbox.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- “I Created a System to Make Sure My Husband and I Divide Household Duties Fairly. Here’s How It Works” by Eve Rodsky (https://time.com/5690007/divide-household-chores-fairly/)
- “Chores and Your Marriage” by Greg Smalley (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/chores-and-your-marriage/)
- “Divide and Conquer Household Duties for a Happier Marriage” by Suzanne Gosselin (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/marriage-success/divide-and-conquer-household-duties-for-a-happier-marriage/)
- “Survey: Most Hated Chores in the Home” by Cinch Home Services (https://www.cinchhomeservices.com/homeowners/blog/survey-most-hated-chores)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Your marriage isn’t built on dishes and laundry, but how you handle them matters.What if splitting chores wasn’t just about being fair but about truly serving each other?
In this episode, we share 3 simple ways to divide household responsibilities that make life at home smoother and strengthen your marriage.
You’ll Learn:
- How to divide and conquer based on strengths
- Why volunteering for a dreaded chore shows love in action
- The power of covering for each other when life gets hectic
“Us Time” Challenge: Take on a chore your spouse hates this week. Small sacrifice, big connection.
RESOURCES & FREEBIES
- Free resource: Five Simple Marriage Tools You Should Know (com/5-simple-marriage-tools-you-should-know)
- Book: Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- Freebie: Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- “I Created a System to Make Sure My Husband and I Divide Household Duties Fairly. Here’s How It Works” by Eve Rodsky (https://time.com/5690007/divide-household-chores-fairly/)
- “Chores and Your Marriage” by Greg Smalley (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/chores-and-your-marriage/)
- “Divide and Conquer Household Duties for a Happier Marriage” by Suzanne Gosselin (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/marriage-success/divide-and-conquer-household-duties-for-a-happier-marriage/)
- “Survey: Most Hated Chores in the Home” by Cinch Home Services (https://www.cinchhomeservices.com/homeowners/blog/survey-most-hated-chores)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Did you know that 85% of affairs start at work, and one in five employees admit to being unfaithful with a coworker? In today’s episode, we’re not just talking about temptation, though. We’re talking about prevention. One of the best ways to protect your marriage is to build something meaningful insideit. We’re diving into three shared purposes that can shift your relationship from just managing life together to truly living itas a team.
3 SHARED PURPOSES TO HELP PROTECT YOUR MARRIAGE
- Grow more Christlike together
- Be dream-makers together
- Battle common enemies together
TAKE THE “US TIME” CHALLENGE
Set aside twenty minutes to ask each other this question:
“What’s a dream—big or small—you’ve been holding onto lately?”
Then just listen and hear each other’s heart. Be a dream-maker with your spouse, not a dream-taker. Or, if you want to start smaller, do the dishes or fold laundry together and make it a regular habit.
CONNECT WITH US
Sign up for our weekly email newsletter and get the FREE resource Five Simple Marriage Tools You Should Know here: ashleighslater.com/5-simple-marriage-tools-you-should-know/
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- “When Your Marriage Needs a Break” by Ashleigh Slater (https://www.huffpost.com/entry/when-your-marriage-needs_b_6866558)
- “85% of Affairs Start Here,” Front Row with Ken Coleman (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ttfD_a6QTY&ab_channel=FrontRowSeatwithKenColeman)
- “What Makes a Marriage Distinctly Christian?” by Bob Lepine (https://www.familylife.com/articles/topics/marriage/staying-married/growing-spiritually/what-makes-a-marriage-distinctively-christian/)
- “Dreaming Together in Marriage” by Erin Smalley (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/dreaming-together-in-marriage/)
- “How to Start Dreaming with Your Spouse Again” by Mark and Jill Savage (https://jillsavage.org/how-to-dream-with-spouse-again/)
- Every Marriage Can Get Better with Mark and Jill Savage {Episode 65} (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us-podcast-episode-65/)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Is the kitchen a battleground in your marriage? In this episode, we’re dishing out three attitudes you can bring to the kitchen to turn tension over tacos into love over lasagna. If “I love you, but step away from the stove” sounds familiar, tune in to discover how to make shared cooking time a recipe for deeper intimacy.
3 ATTITUDES TO BRING TO THE KITCHEN
- Respect
- Curiosity
- Humility
TAKE THE “US TIME” CHALLENGE
Next time you cook together—or even just prep a quick lunch—try this: pick one of these three attitudes to intentionally practice. Whether it’s showing respect by biting your tongue, asking a curious question, or stepping back with humility, try it out. Then talk about how it went.
CONNECT WITH US
Sign up for our weekly email newsletter and get the FREE resource Five Simple Marriage Tools You Should Know here: ashleighslater.com/5-simple-marriage-tools-you-should-know/
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- Food Fights: I Love You, But I Hate Your Cooking {Episode 813} from Christopher Kimball’s Milk Street Radio (https://www.177milkstreet.com/radio/food-fights-i-love-you-but-i-hate-your-cooking)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
The school year is back in full swing. If you're a parent, that probably means your calendar just got a whole lot crazier. In today’s episode, we’re tackling three common back-to-school stressors and sharing practical ways you and your spouse can turn chaos into calm.
3 BACK-TO-SCHOOL CHALLENGES COUPLES FACE
- Syncing family schedules
- Emotional exhaustion
- Parenting style conflicts
PRACTICAL WAYS TO TURN CHAOS INTO CALM
- Have a calendar white board and daily check ins
- Give each other time alone for self-care and also take breaks together
- Stop, ask, and listen, and use the 49/51 percent rule
TAKE THE “US TIME” CHALLENGE
Talk with your spouse about what the top challenges are for you as we head into this new school year. Then, brainstorm some practical ways you can turn that chaos into calm as a team.
CONNECT WITH US
Sign up for our weekly email newsletter and get the FREE resource Five Simple Marriage Tools You Should Know here: ashleighslater.com/5-simple-marriage-tools-you-should-know/
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- “Kids reflect on the start of a new school year” by Ayesha Rascoe at NPR (https://www.npr.org/2024/09/08/nx-s1-5101763/kids-reflect-on-the-start-of-a-new-school-year)
- “How to Cope with Parental Burnout as a Couple” by Kristin and Todd Evans at Focus on the Family (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/parenting-stress-in-marriage-how-to-cope-as-a-couple/)
- “One Ritual You and Your Partner Need to Feel More Connected” by Aaron and April Jacob at Gottman Institute (https://www.gottman.com/blog/one-ritual-partner-need-feel-connected/)
- “How to Navigate Different Parenting Styles” by Kendra Han at Gottman Institute (https://www.gottman.com/blog/navigate-different-parenting-styles/)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Within the Christian community, “Do not let the sun go down on your anger” is often quoted as a hard-and-fast rule for married couples to follow whenever they experience conflict. But sometimes Ted and I do go to bed mad—and surprisingly, it’s been good for our marriage. In today’s episode, we’ll tell you why.
TAKE THE "US TIME" CHALLENGE
Think of another hard-and-fast rule couples are often told. Do you practice it in your marriage? How has it been helpful? If not, what do you do instead and why?
LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK
Did you enjoy this episode? Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts! (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/team-us/id1565819107)
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- Commentary on Ephesians 4:26 at BibleRef.com (https://www.bibleref.com/Ephesians/4/Ephesians-4-26.html)
- “The Benefits of Slumber” at NIH News in Health (https://newsinhealth.nih.gov/2013/04/benefits-slumber#)
- The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages by Shaunti Feldhahn (https://amzn.to/4dgY67T)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
What’s the secret to a strong marriage? Listen in as we talk about the importance of consistent follow through in three specific areas.
TAKE THE "US TIME" CHALLENGE
Pick one idea from each of the areas to put into practice this week.
LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK
Did you enjoy this episode? Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts! (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/team-us/id1565819107)
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- “Beating the Carnies: The Secrets to Winning 5 Popular State Fair Games,” Brett and Kate McCay, The Art of Manliness (https://www.artofmanliness.com/living/games-tricks/how-to-win-state-fair-games/)
- “The Ideal Praise-to-Criticism Ratio,” Jack Zenger and Joseph Folkman, Harvard Business Review (https://hbr.org/2013/03/the-ideal-praise-to-criticism)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
We share five of our favorite strategies for teamwork in marriage. So, if you and your spouse are feeling out of synch lately, don’t miss this episode!
5 KEY STRATEGIES FOR TEAMWORK
- Get on the same page
- Enjoy something new
- Choose lightheartedness
- Make peace with the past
- Fight as allies
TAKE THE “US TIME” CHALLENGE
Think about what you and your spouse do that makes you most feel like a team and why.
CONNECT WITH US
Sign up for our weekly email newsletter and get the FREE resource Five Simple Marriage Tools You Should Know here: ashleighslater.com/5-simple-marriage-tools-you-should-know/
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
In this episode, we focus on engaged couples and those contemplating marriage. A wedding marks the beginning of a marriage — and that marriage is the joining of two people. So, a wedding should be the joint ideas, preferences, and efforts of those two people. Listen in as we share three skills couples can practice when they approach wedding planning as a team.
TAKE THE “US TIME” CHALLENGE
We have two this week. First, for the already-married couples who listened, look back at your wedding planning and reminisce on how you may have practiced one or more of these skills. Second, for engaged couples, pick one of these three skills and apply it to something you either still need to plan or an area where you are having a hard time agreeing.
CONNECT WITH US
Sign up for our weekly email newsletter and get the FREE resource Five Simple Marriage Tools You Should Know here: ashleighslater.com/5-simple-marriage-tools-you-should-know/
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Do you and your spouse have summer travel plans? Whether it’s a family vacation, a couple’s getaway, or a trip to spend time with extended family, we have five travel tips for you in today’s episode.
TAKE THE “US TIME” CHALLENGE
Talk with your spouse about your travel styles. And, if you plan to travel this summer, spend time making the plans together and anticipating and preparing for triggers.
CONNECT WITH US
Sign up for our weekly email newsletter and get the FREE resource Five Simple Marriage Tools You Should Know here: ashleighslater.com/5-simple-marriage-tools-you-should-know/
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- “Traveling with Your Partner? Tips for Taking Long Vacations Together,” by Maria Morava at Newsweek (https://www.newsweek.com/tips-traveling-partner-together-vacations-relationships-1927611)
- “How Travel Affects Sleep And What to Do About It” by Jordi Lippe-McGraw at Forbes (https://www.forbes.com/sites/jordilippemcgraw/2024/05/22/how-travel-affects-sleep-and-what-to-do-about-it/)
- “Fewer Americans are planning summer travel. Travel costs aren’t the top reason” by Bella Stoddart at CNBC (https://www.cnbc.com/2025/04/24/planning-a-summer-vacation-fewer-planning-trips-because-of-costs.html)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Author, speaker, and podcaster Kate Battistelli and her husband Mike are back on the podcast to give us practical wisdom on why preparing for the empty nest starts while the nest is still full.
TAKE THE “US TIME” CHALLENGE
Invest in your relationship this week by watching either the sunrise or the sunset together.
ABOUT MIKE AND KATE BATTISTELLI
Mike and Kate met as active professionals in the NYC Music and Broadway Theatre world. But when God called them to follow Him and lay down those dreams, they did! They’ve now been married forty-one years. Today, Mike is a realtor in the Nashville area, and Kate is a speaker, podcaster, and the author of Growing Great Kids, The God Dare, and The After Party of the Empty Nest. They are also the parents of Grammy and Dove Award-winning singer/songwriter and Contemporary Christian recording artist Francesca Battistelli and grandparents to seven grandkids.
CONNECT WITH MIKE AND KATE BATTISTELLI
- Visit Kate’s website (https://katebattistelli.com/)
- Receive FREE sample chapters of The After Party of the Empty Nest by texting GODDARE to 44144
- Follow Kate on Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/KateBattistelli/), Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/katebattistelli/), and Twitter (https://twitter.com/katebattistelli)
CONNECT WITH TED AND ASHLEIGH
Sign up for our weekly email newsletter and get the FREE resource Five Simple Marriage Tools You Should Know here: https://ashleighslater.com/5-simple-marriage-tools-you-should-know/
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Dating your spouse is vital for a thriving marriage. While dates can sometimes be pricey, they don’t have to be. We’re sharing ten fun, budget-friendly date ideas for you and your spouse.
TAKE THE “US TIME” CHALLENGE
Pick one of the date ideas we shared and try it, or come up with your own. Let us know what you did by sharing on social media and tagging us. If you subscribe to my email newsletter at AshleighSlater.com, you can also respond to it and let us know what you did.
CONNECT WITH US
Sign up for our weekly email newsletter and get the FREE resource Five Simple Marriage Tools You Should Know here: ashleighslater.com/5-simple-marriage-tools-you-should-know/
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
How do you and your spouse give and receive love? In this episode, we talk about the five love languages. We unpack each one and give you practical ideas on how to express them.
FIVE LOVE LANGUAGES
- Words of Affirmation
- Quality Time
- Receiving Gifts
- Acts of Service
- Physical Touch
TAKE THE “US TIME” CHALLENGE
Pick a practical way to speak your spouse’s love language this week. It doesn’t have to be one of our suggestions. If you don’t know your spouse’s love language, either get them to take the quiz or observe them and see what builds them up the most.
CONNECT WITH US
Sign up for our weekly email newsletter and get the FREE resource Five Simple Marriage Tools You Should Know here: ashleighslater.com/5-simple-marriage-tools-you-should-know/
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- “How the Love Languages Can Revolutionize Your Marriage,” Focus on the Family with Jim Daly and guest Dr. Gary Chapman (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/episodes/broadcast/how-the-love-languages-can-revolutionize-your-marriage/)
- “What Are the Five Love Languages” by Sherri Gordon (https://www.verywellmind.com/can-the-five-love-languages-help-your-relationship-4783538)
- “The Art of Active Listening” at Inspire Well Being (https://www.inspirewellbeing.org/the-art-of-active-listening/)
- The Love Languages Quiz (https://5lovelanguages.com/quizzes/love-language)
- “Here's What the Love Language Words of Affirmation Really Means, and How to Speak It” by Jill Gleeson (https://www.countryliving.com/life/inspirational-stories/a45666429/words-of-affirmation-love-language-examples/)
- “The Psychology Behind the 5 Love Languages” by UAGC Staff Member (https://www.uagc.edu/blog/the-psychology-behind-the-5-love-languages)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Do you want a happier marriage? Then, it’s time to start thinking about what you think about! We have marriage and family speakers, podcasters, and authors Dan and Danielle Macaulay on the podcast. They share why the happiness of your marriage starts in your head.
TAKE THE “US TIME” CHALLENGE
Make a positive adjective list as Danielle talked about. Then, as Dan mentioned, share at least one of those list items with your spouse.
CONNECT WITH US
Sign up for our weekly email newsletter and get the FREE resource Five Simple Marriage Tools You Should Know here: ashleighslater.com/5-simple-marriage-tools-you-should-know/
ABOUT DAN AND DANIELLE MACAULAY
Dan and Danielle Macaulay have been married for twenty-three years and travel across Canada and the U.S. wearing multiple “hats” in ministry spanning singing, speaking, family, worship, and marriage ministries. Dan is a GMA Music Canada Award winner and nine-time nominee, with songs used around the world in churches and radio. Danielle is an author of five books centered on relationships, families, and ministering to women. Dan and Danielle have a marriage podcast called Married Up, now in its fourth season (marriedup.net) and are regulars on the marriage TV show, A Better Us.
CONNECT WITH DAN AND DANIELLE MACAULAY
- Married Up podcast (https://marriedup.net)
- A Better Us TV Show on YouTube (https://bit.ly/3IoibZg)
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Are you a reader? In this episode, we share five super practical, must-read marriage books that will encourage, challenge, and inspire you and your spouse.
5 Books to Enrich Your Marriage
- The Five Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman
- For Women Only by Shaunti Feldhahn and For Men Only by Jeff and Shaunti Feldhahn
- The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John M. Gottman and Nan Silver
- The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages by Shaunti Feldhahn
- The Marriage Course with Nicky and Sila Lee
TAKE THE “US TIME” CHALLENGE
Start reading one of the books we recommended or start the Marriage Course, and let us know either via Instagram, Facebook, or email one way it’s helping you and your spouse.
CONNECT WITH US
Sign up for Ashleigh's weekly email newsletter and get our FREE resource "Five Simple Marriage Tools You Should Know." You can do that here: ashleighslater.com/5-simple-marriage-tools-you-should-know/
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
LINKS TO THE RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- The Five Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman (https://amzn.to/4jFtIqg)
- For Women Only by Shaunti Feldhahn (https://amzn.to/4jr1cZQ) and For Men Only by Jeff and Shaunti Feldhahn (https://amzn.to/3Rwebx6)
- The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John M. Gottman and Nan Silver (https://amzn.to/42piLDx)
- The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages by Shaunti Feldhahn (https://amzn.to/3YG6cBq)
- The Marriage Course with Nicky and Sila Lee (https://www.themarriagecourse.org/try-a-course-online)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Do you have a pet? We have three! Today, we share how having pets has benefited our marriage, and we believe they can make your relationship better, too.
3 WAYS PETS MAKE YOU BETTER PARTNERS
- Pets bring us together
- Pets help us laugh together more
- Pets offer opportunities for teamwork
TAKE THE “US TIME” CHALLENGE
If you have a pet, talk about how your pet has benefited your marriage. If you don’t have a pet, maybe visit a park this week and watch the dogs and other wildlife. See how it sparks conversation or helps you laugh more.
LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK
Did you enjoy this episode? Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts! (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/team-us/id1565819107)
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- "Pet Ownership Statistics 2025” by Michelle Megna at Forbes.com (https://www.forbes.com/advisor/pet-insurance/pet-ownership-statistics/)
- “3 Ways Owning a Pet Can Improve Your Love Life” by Mark Travers at Forbes.com (https://www.forbes.com/sites/traversmark/2024/02/05/3-ways-owning-a-pet-can-improve-your-love-life/)
- “Are Dogs or Cats More Likely to Make Us Laugh?” by Stanley Coren at Psychology Today (https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/canine-corner/201509/are-dogs-or-cats-more-likely-make-us-laugh)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Do you and your spouse struggle to find things to talk about? We hope to help with that! We’ll share three practical ways to spark conversation in your marriage when you’ve run out of things to say.
3 WAYS TO SPARK CONVERSATION
- Through Scripture and stories
- By getting nostalgic
- With flirting
TAKE THE “US TIME” CHALLENGE
Pick one of these three ways to spark conversation with your spouse this week.
LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK
Did you enjoy this episode? Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts! (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/team-us/id1565819107)
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- "Have You Run Out of Things to Talk About with Your Partner?” by Susan Krauss Whitbourne (https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-at-any-age/201911/have-you-run-out-of-things-to-talk-about-with-your-partner)
- The Bible Recap (https://www.thebiblerecap.com/)
- “Nostalgia Reveals the Importance of Family and Close Relationships” by Clay Routledge (https://ifstudies.org/blog/nostalgia-reveals-the-importance-of-family-and-close-relationships)
- “Flirt Your Way to a Better Marriage” by Lisa Jacobson (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/flirt-your-way-to-a-better-marriage/)
- “Without Flirting, It Wouldn’t Be a Marriage” by Sarah Hunter Murray (https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/myths-desire/201909/without-flirting-it-wouldnt-be-marriage)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Some relationship experts say that couples don’t grow apart. Instead, they stop growing together. Today, we share three practical ways you and your spouse can embrace a growth mindset and continue growing together. A couple of them may surprise you.
3 WAYS TO HAVE A GROWTH MINDSET
- Allow your spouse to live outside the box
- Get to know your spouse … continually
- Keep “under the rug” clean
TAKE THE “US TIME” CHALLENGE
Grow together this week with online date night questions or Jon Gottman’s love map exercises.
LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK
Did you enjoy this episode? Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts! (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/team-us/id1565819107)
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- “Couple Don’t Simply Grow Apart, They Fail to Grow Together” by Dr. Ryan Rasner at Prairie Wife in Heels (https://prairiewifeinheels.com/couples-dont-simply-grow-apart-they-fail-to-grow-together/)
- The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages by Shaunti Feldhahn (https://amzn.to/4i4s0O6)
- The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman Ph.D. and Nan Silver (https://amzn.to/4jk0U6E)
- Save Your marriage Before It Starts by Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott (https://a.co/d/eJGAhi1)
- “Don’t Bury Your Relational Issues” by Ashleigh Slater at Boundless.org (https://www.boundless.org/relationships/dont-bury-your-relational-issues/)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Do you and your spouse laugh together? Today, we talk about how shared humor and laughter can benefit your relationship.
3 WAYS SHARED HUMOR STRENGTHENS MARRIAGE
- Builds intimacy
- Helps defuse conflict and restore connection
- Makes the hard times more manageable
TAKE THE “US TIME” CHALLENGE
Do something to feed your shared sense of humor. As one writer we quote in this episode recommends, “Collect experiences, look for the places where comedy shows up. Look for the ridiculous, the surprising, the awkward.”
LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK
Did you enjoy this episode? Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts! (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/team-us/id1565819107)
TEAM US RESOURCES
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
- “How did April Fool’s Day start and what are some famous pranks?” by Aliza Chasan at CBS News (https://www.cbsnews.com/news/how-did-april-fools-day-start/)
- Spaghetti Harvest clip at BBC (https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p0074rd6)
- “Humor in Marriage” by Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott at Focus on the Family (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/humor-in-marriage/)
- “R is for Repair” by Zach Brittle at the Gottman Institute (https://www.gottman.com/blog/r-is-for-repair/)
- “Why Laughter Is Good for Your Marriage” by Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott at Focus on the Family (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/why-laughter-is-good-for-your-marriage/)
- Ted’s master’s thesis on laughter (https://heavenlaughs.com/)
- The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John M. Gottman, Ph.D. and Nan Silver (https://amzn.to/4j0Dind)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
When it comes to the joy and the stress of the holidays, how do you and your spouse approach it? As a united team? Or do turkeys, tinsel, and extended family get-togethers tend to turn you against each other? If you aren’t sure how to face the holidays together, we share five ways you can navigate the season hand-in-hand rather than back-to-back.
5 Ways to Face the Holiday Together
- Set expectations together.
- Spend dedicated time together.
- Serve others together.
- Dream together.
- Face conflict together.
Us Time Challenge
Set expectations together for your holiday season. Determine what you want this holiday season to be like and then come up with some plans to accomplish that.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/teamuspodcast/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
When you go out as a couple, do you and your spouse engage the people God puts in your path? Or are you so focused on yourselves that you miss out on impacting others and allowing others to affect you? Today, we share three reasons to engage others as a couple.
3 Reasons to Engage Others as a Couple
- Engaging others as a couple can push us out of our comfort zone, which is where we grow the most.
- Engaging others allows us to help others feel seen and valued.
- Engaging others pushes us to surrender our plans to God’s plans.
Us Time Challenge
Look for opportunities to engage others the next time you’re out as a couple.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- “The Powerful Benefits of Stepping Outside of Your Comfort Zone” by Stephanie Cornwell at RealSimple.com (https://www.realsimple.com/how-to-get-out-of-your-comfort-zone-7559829)
- “Is Zeus Dead Yet? A Guide to Having Better Conversations” by Kate Gatson at RabbitRoom.com (https://www.rabbitroom.com/post/is-zeus-dead-yet-a-guide-to-having-better-conversations )
- “Life’s Interruptions Are Divine Opportunities” by Trevin Wax at DesiringGod.com (https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/trevin-wax/lifes-interruptions-are-divine-opportunities/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/teamuspodcast/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
What’s the secret to a strong marriage? Listen in as we talk about the importance of consistent follow through in three specific areas.
Us Time Challenge
Pick one idea from each of the areas to put into practice this week.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- “Beating the Carnies: The Secrets to Winning 5 Popular State Fair Games,” Brett and Kate McCay, The Art of Manliness (https://www.artofmanliness.com/living/games-tricks/how-to-win-state-fair-games/)
- “The Ideal Praise-to-Criticism Ratio,” Jack Zenger and Joseph Folkman, Harvard Business Review (https://hbr.org/2013/03/the-ideal-praise-to-criticism)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/teamuspodcast/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Are you and your spouse in a season of grief? When we face loss, sometimes it’s hard to walk through it hand-in-hand. We share two practical things we have done to navigate grief together over the years.
Us Time Challenge
Think about how you grieve and consider how your spouse does. What are some ways you can better understand and respect the way your spouse experiences grief?
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- “The Five Stages of Grief,” Grief.com (https://grief.com/the-five-stages-of-grief/)
- Naming the Child: Hope-filled Reflections on Miscarriage, Stillbirth, and Infant Death by Jenny Schroedel (https://a.co/d/6rNy0FU)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/teamuspodcast/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Does what you choose to remember about your spouse impact your marriage? Absolutely. In today’s episode, we share three reasons why what you remember in your marriage matters.
3 Reasons Why What You Remember Matters
- What you choose to remember can define the narrative.
- What you choose to remember can drive our attitude.
- What we choose to remember helps keep us committed.
Us Time Challenge
If you don’t already have your vows framed and hung in your house, do that this week. Read them regularly. As you do, remind yourself that what you remember about your spouse and your marriage matters.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- “Your Memory Is like the Telephone Game” by Marla Paul (https://news.northwestern.edu/stories/2012/09/your-memory-is-like-the-telephone-game/)
- “Psychology professor explores how we remember, how we forget, and how we forget to remember” by Matt Wing (https://news.illinoisstate.edu/2023/09/committed-to-memory/)
- The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages by Shaunti Feldhahn (https://amzn.to/3BsZlCw)
- “Why Your Vows Matter More Now Than Your Wedding Day” by Adam Hillis (https://medium.com/publishous/heres-why-your-vows-actually-mean-more-now-than-your-wedding-day-a49dc0d83b93)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/teamuspodcast/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
In this episode, we talk about how getting married requires us to realign our relational loyalties and priorities. We’ll share three practical ways we’ve learned to “leave and cleave” in marriage. We hope you will find them helpful, too.
3 Ways to Better “Leave and Cleave”
- Give your spouse priority over parents and siblings
- Determine to make decisions together first
- Decide not to involve in extended family in marital conflict
Us Time Challenge
Write down one specific thing you struggle with when it comes to leaving and cleaving. Share it with your spouse and see if they agree it’s an issue. Brainstorm together two or three ideas on how you can improve in this area.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/teamuspodcast/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
If you are parents or hope to be in the future, this episode is for you. We’re sharing three practical ways you can stay connected as a couple while you raise kids.
Us Time Challenge
If you are currently parents, talk about what phase of parenting you are in and brainstorm ways you can stay connected. You can use the suggestions we’ve offered or come up with your own. If you don’t have kids yet, talk to friends with children and learn practical ways they stay connected while parenting.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- “6 Types of Rituals to Maintain in Your Marriage,” Prepare and Enrich (https://www.prepare-enrich.com/blog/6-types-of-rituals-to-maintain-in-your-marriage/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/teamuspodcast/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
We all feel discouraged sometimes. But what about when our spouse feels beaten down or weary? On this episode, we share some practical ways you can encourage your discouraged spouse.
4 Ideas for Encouraging Your Discouraged Spouse
- Speak your spouse’s love language
- Become a “megaphone” of encouragement
- Be patient with your spouse
- See the “hero” in your spouse
Us Time Challenge
Ask your spouse what most encourages them when they’re discouraged.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/teamuspodcast/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Among married couples, sometimes there’s this belief that “an affair could never happen to us!” As a result, safeguards are often not set in place. In this episode, we share four strategies we use to safeguard our marriage from affairs. Perhaps they’ll also be helpful to you.
4 Strategies for Safeguarding Your Marriage from Affairs
- Recognize you are not immune from temptation.
- Choose your close friends or confidants wisely.
- Follow Billy Graham’s example.
- Reject keeping secrets.
Us Time Challenge
Sit down and talk through what safeguards you have in place. If you don’t have any, establish and agree on some.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/teamuspodcast/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Do you ever run out of things to talk about with your spouse? After almost twenty-two years of marriage, we do! In this episode, we share some fun conversation starters we found online and model for you how to use them to connect with your spouse.
Conversation Starters We Answer
- If you could have any job, whether serious or silly, and money was not a factor, what would it be?
- If time travel existed, when and where would you like to visit first?
- Who are three famous people, dead or alive, you would want to have lunch with?
- If you could only listen to two albums for the rest of your life, which ones would you choose, and why?
- What do you think our biggest strength as a couple is? What about our biggest weakness?
- What’s a "little thing" in our relationship that you really love?
- If our life was a reality TV series, what do you think would be the most appropriate title?
- What is one date we have not done you would like to do?
"Us Time" Challenge
Ask each other the conversation starters we used or find additional ones online.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- “93 Meaningful Conversation Starters & Questions for Couples to Better Connect,” The Adventure Challenge, https://www.theadventurechallenge.com/blogs/news/conversation-starters-for-couples/
- “260 Free Printable Conversation Starters for Couples,” WinShape Marriage, https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/conversation-starters-for-date-night/
- Bedtime Prayers: Lullabies and Peaceful Worship by Twila Paris (https://amzn.to/4gf4aj5)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/teamuspodcast/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
When was the last time you and your spouse took the time to dream together? In this episode, Mike and Kate Battistelli join us and share what it looks like to trust God with everything and bravely step into His dreams for us. You don’t want to miss this interview!
Us Time Challenge
Talk about your dreams and goals as a couple. Is there a God Dare you need to answer together?
Connect with Mike and Kate Battistelli
- Visit Kate’s website (https://katebattistelli.com/)
- Receive FREE sample chapters of The God Dare by texting GODDARE to 44144
- Read Growing Great Kids: Partner with God to Cultivate His Purpose in Your Child’s Life (https://katebattistelli.com/growing-great-kids/)
- Read The God Dare: Will You Choose to Believe the Impossible? (https://katebattistelli.com/god-dare/)
- Follow Kate on Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/KateBattistelli/), Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/katebattistelli/), and Twitter (https://twitter.com/katebattistelli)
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/teamuspodcast/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
It’s our 50th episode! To celebrate, today, we’re talking about celebrations. We’ll explore why celebrating together as a couple matters and share practical ways you can mark both the big and the small milestones, victories, and occasions as a couple.
Us Time Challenge
Find something to celebrate this week.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- “Anniversary Gifts by the Year: Our Traditional and Modern Guide,” Brides.com (https://www.brides.com/gallery/wedding-anniversary-gifts-by-year-for-him-her-and-them)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/teamuspodcast/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Are you or your spouse in the military? Or do you have friends or family members who are? If so, you don’t want to miss this episode. Mike and Carlie Kercheval join us. They’re trained Christian marriage counselors, certified marriage coaches and mentors, best-selling authors, and more. Mike and Carlie spent years of their marriage as a military couple. Listen in as they share encouragement for other military couples and offer ideas on how those not serving in the armed forces can support those who are.
Take the "Us Time" Challenge
Join Mike and Carlie's Free 5-Day Marriage Communication Challenge at marriagelegacyuniversity.com.
More from Mike and Carlie Kercheval
- Visit Marriage Legacy University (https://www.marriagelegacyuniversity.com/)
- Listen to the Wives of Integrity Podcast (https://www.marriagelegacyuniversity.com/podcasts/wives-of-integrity)
- Listen to the Praying Couple Podcast (https://www.marriagelegacyuniversity.com/podcasts/the-praying-couple-podcast)
- Follow Mike and Carlie on Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/marriagelegacyuniversity) and Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/marriagelegacyuniversity)
Team Us Resources
-
Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
-
FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/teamuspodcast/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Do you and your spouse have fun together? As couples, sometimes we can get in a rut and feel like life — and marriage — are all work and no play. In this episode, we’re exploring how we can make marriage fun again.
"Us Time" Challenge
If fun is lacking from your marriage, try one of our suggestions.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- “Ideas for How to Add Fun Back into Your Marriage” by Andrew Linder
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/teamuspodcast/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
In many places, the school year has started. How can you stay connected as a couple when the fall schedule threatens to pull you apart? Today, we’re sharing some marriage survival tips for the school year.
4 Marriage Survival Tips for the School Year
- Create a Plan
- Reduce Commitments
- Let Other Things Go
- Tackle Tasks Together
Take the "Us Time" Challenge
Pull out your calendar and create a plan for connecting daily and dating weekly.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage
- FREE Team Us Study Guide
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- How to Have a Front-Seat Marriage with James and Arlene Pellicane {Episode 39}
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
In this week's episode, we talk with author, speaker, Bible teacher, and podcaster Jennifer Rothschild and her husband Phil about how to team up in all seasons of life.
Take the "Us Time" Challenge
Find a couple you know who has been married for thirty years or more. Ask them what they’ve done to remain a team, and then put some of their advice into practice in your marriage.
More from Jennifer Rothschild
- Visit Jennifer's website (https://jenniferrothschild.com/)
- Amos: An Invitation to the Good Life by Jennifer Rothschild (https://www.jenniferrothschild.com/amos/)
- Take Courage: A Study of Haggai by Jennifer Rothschild (https://www.jenniferrothschild.com/store/product/take-courage-a-study-of-haggai-bible-study-member-book-video-access/)
- Psalm 23: The Shepherd With Me by Jennifer Rothschild (https://www.jenniferrothschild.com/store/product/psalm-23-the-shepherd-with-me-bible-study-member-book/)
- The 4:13 Podcast with Jennifer Rothschild (https://www.jenniferrothschild.com/category/podcast/)
- Follow Jennifer on Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/jennifer.j.rothschild) and Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/jennrothschild/)
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/teamuspodcast/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
What relationship-building habits do you and your spouse have? Listen in as we share five practices that, if made a habit, can potentially improve your marriage.
Take the "Us Time" Challenge
Pick one of these practices to make a habit.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage
- FREE Team Us Study Guide
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- Debra Filet’s Instagram post
- “The Sound Relationship House: Build Love Maps” by Ellie Lisitsa at The Gottman Institute
- Dr. Gary Chapman: The 5 Apology Languages and Their Meanings on Kirk Cameron on TBN
- The Apology Language Quiz
- The Surprising Secret of Highly Happy Marriages by Shaunti Feldhahn
- Navigating Mental Health as a Team with Jon and Brett Seidl {Episode 36}
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Do you and your spouse have couple friends? In this episode, we discuss why making them can sometimes be challenging, offer you some practical tips on how to find and connect with other married couples, and share three types of couple friends we all need.
Listen to the EpisodeTake the "Us Time" Challenge
Think about your couple friends. Do you have some? If so, schedule a time to go on a double date or hang out. If you don’t, come up with a strategy for making some.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage
- FREE Team Us Study Guide
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- "Couple Devotional: Community" by Laird Crump at Focus on the Family
- "How to Make (New) Couple Friends" at Prepare and Enrich
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
No matter how long you’ve been married, reminding yourself of fundamental marriage truths is helpful. In this episode, we’ll share four truths about marriage every couple needs to remember.
4 Truths About Marriage Every Couple Needs to Remember
- When marriage gets hard, it’s normal to wonder if you’ve made a mistake — but it doesn’t mean you have.
- Conflict is useful, but learning how to do it well takes practice.
- Your spouse will change, but sometimes that change is unpredictable.
- You need to “leave and cleave,” but it’s easier said than done.
Us Time Challenge
Talk about which of these truths you needed to be reminded of most. Ask yourselves: How can we live it out in our marriage this week?
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage
- FREE Team Us Study Guide
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- “6 Truths About Marriage Every Engaged Couple Needs to Hear” by Ashleigh Slater at Boundless.org
- “Did I Marry the Wrong Person” by Glenn Lutjens at FocusontheFamily.com
- “Want a Great Marriage Someday? Learn to handle conflict now” by Suzanne Hadley Gosselin at Boundless.org
- Reset: Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta
- The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages: The Little Things That Make a Big Difference by Shaunti Feldhahn
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Did you know that you and your spouse are a couple of influence? It’s true! Even if you don’t have a platform, television show, or a large online following, you are daily influencing — for better or for worse — how those around you think about marriage. Today, we share three ways you can use your influence for good.
3 Ways to Be Positive Influencers
- Be real
- Choose grace
- Laugh together
Us Time Challenge
Think about a couple you know who influences you to see marriage in a positive light. What is it about what they do, say, and live that makes you view marriage well? How can you practice some of the same things in your relationship?
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage
- FREE Team Us Study Guide
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- Ted’s master’s thesis on laughter
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Within the Christian community, “Do not let the sun go down on your anger” is often quoted as a hard-and-fast rule for married couples to follow whenever they experience conflict. But sometimes Ted and I do go to bed mad—and surprisingly, it’s been good for our marriage. In today’s episode, we’ll tell you why.
3 Reasons We Go to Bed Mad
- We don’t want to sweep any issues under the rug.
- We need a break before addressing conflict.
- We want genuine apologies and real reconciliation.
Us Time Challenge
Think of another hard-and-fast rule couples are often told. Do you practice it in your marriage? How has it been helpful? If not, what do you do instead and why?
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage
- FREE Team Us Study Guide
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- Commentary on Ephesians 4:26 at BibleRef.com
- “The Benefits of Slumber” at NIH News in Health
- The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages by Shaunti Feldhahn
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Do you and your spouse approach daily tasks or responsibilities differently? Maybe it’s how you load the dishwasher, fold laundry, or even where you cut your toenails. As couples, sometimes, it’s easy for us to assume our way is the right way and seek to change each other. In this episode, we discuss how to work through the annoyance and loss of control you may feel when your spouse’s way of doing things differs from yours.
2 Practical Ways to Honor God with Your Responses
- Let go of your need to control.
- Stop and thank God for your spouse.
Us Time Challenge
Think of a task or responsibility your spouse tackles very differently from you. What can you appreciate from the way they approach it? What’s one way you can express that appreciation to them?
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- “I Do Things Differently Than My Wife. And That’s OK.” by Clint Edwards at The New York Times
- “The Benefits of Losing Control in Your Marriage” by LeRoy and Kimberly Wagner at FocusontheFamily.com
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/teamuspodcast/)
Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Has your marriage taken a backseat to your parenting? Today, we have author and speaker Arlene Pellicane and her husband James on the podcast. They share practical tips on how your marriage can take a front seat!
Us Time Challenge
Connect daily this week by taking walks around the block.
More from James and Arlene Pellicane
- Visit Arlene Pellicane’s website (https://arlenepellicane.com/)
- 31 Days to a Happy Husband by Arlene Pellicane (https://amzn.to/3Jum9CO)
- 31 Days to Becoming a Happy Wife by Arlene Pellicane (https://amzn.to/3xFG92y)
- Parents Rising by Arlene Pellicane (https://amzn.to/4b1nqgo)
- The Happy Home Podcast with Arlene Pellicane (https://www.accessmore.com/pd/https/arlenepellicanecom/podcasts/)
- Follow Arlene on Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ArlenePellicaneAuthor) and Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/arlenepellicane/)
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/teamuspodcast/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
When you got married, you probably received a lot of advice. I know we did! Well, today, we’re talking about the best marriage advice we’ve ever received. We’ll also share with you some favorite words of wisdom our friends were given.
Us Time Challenge
Talk with your spouse about the best marriage advice you received. Ask yourselves if you are regularly putting it into practice.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/teamuspodcast/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Did you recite traditional vows at your wedding? We did! One thing we promised was, “in sickness and in health.” But what does it look like to walk together as a team through sickness? Best-selling author Jon Seidl and his wife Brett—who is an award-winning interior designer—join us to talk about how they have been navigating debilitating health issues. It’s Part 2 of our interview with them.
Us Time Challenge
When we’re going through hard stuff, there is a lot of opportunity for conflict, misunderstandings, and hurting one another. Talk about what forgiveness looks like in these situations.
More from Jon and Brett Seidl
- Finding Rest: A Survivor’s Guide to Navigating the Valleys of Anxiety, Faith, and Life by Jonathon M. Seidl (https://amzn.to/3xMAKHd)
- Dear Jon with Jonathon M. Seidl (https://jonseidl.substack.com/)
- Lewis and Rose Interiors YouTube channel with Brett Seidl (https://www.youtube.com/@lewisandrose)
- Follow Jon on Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/jonathonmseidl) and Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/jonseidl/)
- Follow Lewis and Rose Interiors on Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/lewisandroseinteriors) and Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/lewisandroseinteriordesign/)
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/teamuspodcast/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Has your marriage been impacted by mental health issues? If so, today’s episode is for you. Best-selling author Jon Seidl and his wife Brett—who is an award-winning interior designer—join us to talk about how they’ve navigated the valleys of anxiety and OCD as a team. It’s Part 1 of two episodes with them. Jon and Brett are open, vulnerable, and wise. You don’t want to miss this interview!
Us Time Challenge
Take time to do a weekly check-in with your spouse. Ask if they are feeling any stress or anxiety, and pray together about it.
More from Jon and Brett Seidl
- Finding Rest: A Survivor’s Guide to Navigating the Valleys of Anxiety, Faith, and Life by Jonathon M. Seidl (https://amzn.to/3xMAKHd)
- Dear Jon with Jonathon M. Seidl (https://jonseidl.substack.com/)
- Lewis and Rose Interiors YouTube channel with Brett Seidl (https://www.youtube.com/@lewisandrose)
- Follow Jon on Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/jonathonmseidl) and Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/jonseidl/)
- Follow Lewis and Rose Interiors on Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/lewisandroseinteriors) and Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/lewisandroseinteriordesign/)
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/teamuspodcast/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Sometimes, we forget in marriage that staying a team takes time. As a result, we can find ourselves slowly drifting away from one another. However, research shows that couples who spend time together regularly and consistently are happier and have a better relationship. Listen in as we discuss why staying a team takes time … and is worth the investment.
3 Ways to Invest Time into Your Relationship
- Schedule time together.
- Just say “no.”
- Be fully present.
Us Time Challenge
Pull out the calendar and schedule a date this week. It doesn’t have to be super special, extra romantic, or even well-planned. Go on an evening walk, do your Costco shopping together, or maybe visit a local food truck.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- “Why Are Divorces Over Forty Becoming More Common?” Harris Family Law Group (https://bestlafamilylawyers.com/why-are-divorces-over-40-becoming-more-common/)
- The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages: The Little Things That Make a Big Difference by Shaunti Feldhahn (https://amzn.to/3Q5zDbT)
- “This Is How Often Married Couples Should Plan Date Nights” by Lily Blomquist at Brides.com (https://www.brides.com/married-couples-date-night-frequency-6823194)
- “Giving Up Good Things for the Best Things in Marriage” by Selena Frederick at Focus on the Family (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/giving-up-good-things-for-the-best-things-in-marriage/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/teamuspodcast/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
We’ve all had situations or experiences where we’ve felt anxious. Maybe before a job interview, during a move or the house-buying process, or when faced with a daunting project or deadline. For some of us, though, anxiousness isn’t limited to a situation or experience. It can be a daily struggle.
Listen in as we share our story and give you some practical suggestions on how you can support, encourage, and stay united when anxiety impacts marriage.
3 Practical Ways to Face Anxiety as a Team
- Identify triggers.
- Establish needs.
- Practice patience.
Us Time Challenge
Talk to your spouse about a time when you felt anxious. What triggered it, and what did you need? How can you prepare to face anxiety as a team in the future.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- List of Phobias: Common Phobias from A to Z at verywellmind.com (https://www.verywellmind.com/list-of-phobias-2795453)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
How often do you need to be right? And how do you respond when you’re not right, and your spouse is? We’re digging into all that today and discussing why being right in marriage can be wrong. Listen in as we chat about how we can help maintain the peace, not by hoping that our spouse, if ever asked, applaud us as always right. But instead, by actively practicing humility.
2 Practical Ways to Choose Humility
- Reject me-centeredness
- Choose both/and
Us Time Challenge
Identify if there are any little areas where you insist on being right. We all have them. Then, figure out how you can practice both/and in this area.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Resources Mentioned in This Episode
- Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
In this episode, we’re talking about something that’s in every marriage—and that’s money! We’ll be the first to admit that finances aren’t an area we have all figured out. But a recent message from our pastor got us freshly contemplating how much trust and dependence we put in it.
Listen in as we reflect on his sermon and share our results from a money personality assessment. We also discuss how we aren’t 100% on the same page in every area regarding money, but we’ve learned not to let it divide us.
Us Time Challenge
Take the 5 Money Personalities Assessment at 5moneypersonalities.com this week with your spouse. Share your results with each other—and with us on social media.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- The 5 Money Personalities Assessment (https://5moneypersonalities.com/)
- For Women Only by Shaunti Feldhahn (https://amzn.to/43Tpfbv)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
See omny.fm/listener for privacy information.
Have you ever looked at your spouse and asked, “What do we have in common?” Maybe there have been times when you’ve even felt like you have more differences than similarities.
In marriage, there’s always the potential for our differences to eat away at our unity—especially if that’s what we focus on. Today, we’re sharing five practical ways you and your spouse can stop your differences from dividing you.
How to Stop Your Differences from Dividing You
- Understand that you are innately different
- Don’t despise each other’s differences
- Learn to appreciate and respect each other’s differences
- Have shared interests that unite you
- Spend time together
Us Time Challenge
Identify one difference that’s been dividing you and your spouse lately. Take some time to think about what you can appreciate and respect about that difference. Then, tell your spouse—and be sure to keep it all positive!
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- Loving Him Well by Gary Thomas
- For Women Only by Shaunti Feldhahn and For Men Only by Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn
- 9 Lies That Will Destroy Your Marriage by Robert Paul and Greg Smalley
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
How often do you intentionally stop to praise your spouse? To recognize and affirm their character or actions? Many of us probably cringe at answering these questions because we know we could do better!
If you struggle to feed your spouse praise regularly, this episode is for you. Listen in as we share some practical steps we all can take to criticize less and affirm and build up our spouse more.
3 Ways to Praise Your Spouse More
- Adopt a grace-filled perspective
- Check your vocabulary and the tone of your praise
- Keep your praise focused on your spouse
Us Time Challenge
Make it your goal to praise your spouse more this week!
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Do you remember the “Anyone can cook” catchphrase from the film Ratatouille? Well, we believe anyone can record a podcast—including you and your spouse. Listen in as we share some ways podcasting together has strengthened our marriage, and we think it can strengthen your relationship too.
3 Ways Podcasting Can Strengthen Your Marriage
- Podcasting gets you talking.
- Podcasting helps you be vulnerable.
- Podcasting is a fun, shared activity.
Us Time Challenge
Record a podcast together! It doesn’t have to be long, fancy, focused on marriage, or even distributed on iTunes. You can record it for family and friends and simply post it on your social media feed. And be sure to tag us when you do!
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Parenting can be wonderful, but it is also demanding and exhausting. We have four kids—we get it! It can be easy to put our spouse and marriage on the back burner. But today, we’re encouraging you not to do that!
Listen in as we share three practical reasons why your marriage relationship needs to take the highest priority after your relationship with God. (And know, this is a conversation full of grace for whatever parenting season you are in!)
3 Reasons Marriage Comes Before Parenting
- Your marriage is a life-long, interdependent commitment
- Your spouse and your marriage aren’t static
- Your kids need you to put your spouse first
Us Time Challenge
Spend time together! If your schedule and current parenting stage don’t easily allow for a date, find time together at home. Sit on the couch or back porch and talk. Take a walk, or have a fun conversation while you drive. The point is not to put your relationship on the backburner!
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- “I’m 99% Mother and 1% Wife — And It Has to Be That Way” at GoodHousekeeping.com (https://www.goodhousekeeping.com/life/parenting/a31760/balancing-mother-and-wife/)
- “I’m 49% Mother and 51% Wife — And It Has to Be That Way” at iBelieve.com (https://www.ibelieve.com/relationships/i-m-49-mother-and-51-wife-and-it-has-to-be-that-way.html)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
What kind of couple do you want to be 5, 10, or 20 years from now? We recently spent a week surrounded by couples who are older than us, and we asked ourselves this exact question. Listen in as we share our thoughts on how you can grow older together and love the couple you become.
The Kind of Couple We Want to Become
- Youthful in spirit
- Joyful in heart
- Hopeful in perspective
Us Time Challenge
Ask yourself: What kind of couple do we want to be in 5, 10, or even 20 years. Then come up with a game plan to start becoming that couple.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Have you ever thought, “My marriage would be a lot easier if my spouse had a personality more like mine”? If so, you’re not alone. We’ve all had moments where something about our spouse’s unique wiring annoys us. Listen in as we talk about what you can do in those moments when your spouse’s personality drives you nuts.
3 Things You Can Do When Your Spouse’s Personality Drives You Nuts
- Consider your spouse’s upbringing and past influences.
- Respect your spouse’s individual wiring even when you don’t understand it.
- Pick your spouse instead of picking a battle.
Us Time Challenge
Pick one of the popular personality tests out there and take it with your spouse. Then talk about your results and share something positive about your spouse’s personality that now makes more sense to you.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Have you and your spouse ever been on a getaway together or a family vacation and it didn’t go so well? We can relate! Today we’ll share a few of our stories, list some reasons you might be experiencing conflict away from home, and give you five marriage survival tips to help you vacation-proof your marriage.
5 Possible Reasons Couples Have Vacation Conflict
- We’re out of our normal routine.
- We’re “living” in small spaces.
- We have different vacation styles.
- We’re sleep deprived.
- We’re navigating challenges with kids.
5 Must-Pack Marriage-Survival Tools for Vacation
- Accurately assess your situation and realize sometimes it will bring out your worst.
- Remember that you’ll be home soon and back to those regular, comfortable habits.
- Fake it until you make it. You know you love your spouse; you just don’t feel like it.
- Have a common enemy.
- Laugh about it together and don’t wait until it’s all over.
Us Time Challenge
This week, look back at a previous vacation that maybe didn’t go so well. Talk and laugh about what you could have done differently. Focus on your own behavior and attitudes, not your spouse’s.
Links Mentioned in This Episode
• “Your Daily Routines Aren’t Mundane—They’re Actually Keeping You Sane and Healthy (It’s Science)” from RealSimple.com (https://www.realsimple.com/work-life/life-strategies/benefits-of-routines)
Team Us Resources
• Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
• FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
• Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
• Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
• Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
What if every time you go out on a date with your spouse, all you talk about is work, bills, schedules, and — if you have them — kids? As vitally important as those things are to discuss, we chat about how you can have a date-night conversation that’s NOT about work, bills, schedules, or kids. Listen in as we share four steps you can put into practice.
4 Steps to Date-Night Conversations That Deepen Your Connection
- Set a timer.
- Pick out conversation starters in advance.
- Choose questions wisely.
- Listen well and be curious.
Us Time Challenge
Go on a date night and practice these steps. Make sure you and your spouse each pick out a conversation starter or two that you want to ask the other.
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- “15 Things Happy Couples Talk About That Draw Them Together” from LifeHack.com (https://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/15-things-happy-couples-talk-about-that-draw-them-closer-together.html)
- Karen Ehman’s free printable, “Getting to Know You Again Date Night Questions” (https://karenehman.com/freebies/)
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
On this episode, we’re doing something a little different! Instead of hearing from us, you’ll listen in on a conversation we had with Todd and Brooke Tilghman. Todd is best known as the Season 18 winner of NBC’s The Voice, and what we really love about their story is that if it hadn’t been for Brooke, Todd would have never auditioned for the show. Talk about teamwork!
Todd and Brooke are high school sweethearts who have been married for 24 years and are the parents of eight kids. They wrote a book called Every Little Win, and Todd recently released a new single called “Dig My Grave.” Join us as we talk with Todd and Brooke about practical ways your marriage can go the distance.
Us Time Challenge
This week, look for small opportunities to spend time connecting with your spouse. Maybe it’s on a ride to the grocery store, taking a walk together in your neighborhood, or doing the dishes.
More from Todd and Brooke Tilghman
- Visit Todd’s website (https://toddtofficial.com/)
- Get Todd and Brooke’s book, Every Little Win: How Celebrating Small Victories Can Lead to Big Joy (https://amzn.to/41n0tjV)
- Follow Todd on Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/toddtilghmanmusic/) and Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/todd_tilghman/)
- Follow Brooke on Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/brooketilghman/)
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Have you ever heard of the game “In So Many Words”? We play it to kick off this episode on communication. But while word games can be fun, sometimes communication in marriage is frustrating. We’ve all felt it! So, how do we navigate it?
Listen in as we talk about communication killers that might be frustrating conversations. We also share three steps you can take when talking to your spouse is a challenge.
3 Steps to Take When Communication Is Frustrating
- Take a break
- Identify what really happened
- Try again
Us Time Challenge
Google communication games for team-building. Pick one to play with your spouse.
Links Mentioned in This Episode
“5 Communication Killers and How to Avoid Them” (https://www.altaredmarriage.com/5-communication-killers-and-how-to-avoid-them/)
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
On this episode, we originally planned to share with you safeguards you can put in place to protect your marriage. But, as Ted says, that’s been done—a lot! So instead, we turn the topic on its head and discuss what you can do to ruin your marriage.
Listen in as we share four things you might be doing to hurt your relationship. You’ll hear why each of these is destructive and why we definitely don’t recommend doing them!
4 Ways You Can Ruin Your Marriage {We Don’t Recommend Them}
- Have close friends of the opposite sex
- Stop communicating and start burying issues
- Focus on the negative
- Stop connecting
Us Time Challenge
Focus on the positive in your spouse, and be sure to share with them what you see!
Resources Mentioned in This Episode
- Loving Him Well: Practical Advice on Influencing Your Husband by Gary Thomas
- “Break Free from Temptation” message from Chad Moore at Sun Valley Community Church (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6fu9g-1yIaI&ab_channel=SunValleyCommunityChurch)
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Have you ever had a Valentine’s Day go wrong? We have! During our first year as a married couple, we ended up fighting over what we now realize was just a big misunderstanding. We learned that how we respond to each other’s words and actions on Valentine’s Day and any day makes a difference in our relationship.
Listen in as we share how that first Valentine’s Day went wrong and what we wish we’d known then that we know now. We also share three practical things you can do to rescue a day gone bad.
3 Ways to Rescue a Day Gone Wrong
- Check expectations.
- Believe the best.
- Extend grace.
Us Time Challenge
Use this week’s challenge to help you avoid even having a Valentine’s Day gone wrong. Take some time to sit down and share expectations for the day. Come up with a plan on how to celebrate that you are both happy with.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
We’re about a month into the new year, and we’re back with brand-new episodes! Maybe your new year has started off strong. Or, like us, you’ve faced some challenges.
Today, we’re talking about how you can team up not just for the new year, but for every minute, hour, day, week, and month of the year! Listen in as we share three practical ways you can walk in unity. We also talk about spiritual warfare in marriage, what that might look like, and share thoughts on how to navigate it hand-in-hand.
3 Ways to Team Up for a New Day, Week, Month, and Year
- Make peace with yesterday, last week, last month, last year, or whatever timeframe you need to.
- Decide to approach every day, week, month, and year with lightheartedness.
- Get on the same page, literally.
Us Time Challenge
Pick one of today’s ways to team up and try it this week.
Team Us Resources
- Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
- FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Links Mentioned in This Episode
- “Is This a Spiritual Attack, or Is My Spouse Just a Jerk?” (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/is-this-a-spiritual-attack-or-is-my-spouse-just-a-jerk/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
- Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
- Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
- Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
If you love listening to "Team Us," we want to introduce you to another LifeAudio podcast we think you'll enjoy: "Faith Over Fear."
Scripture assures us that God does not want us to live enslaved to fear, weighed down by stress, and overpowered by personal weakness. Christ promised us joy, peace, and inexpressible freedom. He also promised to give us the power to experience each of those supernatural gifts. In this special episode of Faith Over Fear, prolific speaker Max Lucado shares a time when, attempting to carry his ministry in his own strength, the burden became nearly crippling and how he found fresh hope and strength through the Holy Spirit.
If you like what you hear and want to continue listening to more episodes, just search "Faith Over Fear" on your favorite podcast app, or click on any of the links below!
Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/faith-over-fear/id1500408829
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/5GCj0NnLVrkEqeSraSxJYx
LifeAudio: https://www.lifeaudio.com/faith-over-fear
We will be back soon with a brand new episode of Team Us. Thanks for listening.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
We’ve made a lot of stressful decisions together over the years. Some have related to job loss, challenges with our kids, financial pressures, and, most recently, our cross-country move. It would be easy for these decisions to pull us apart and turn us against each other instead of drawing us closer. That’s why we are always determined in advance to stay united.
Perhaps you and your spouse are currently facing your own stressful decisions. Join us as we share three team-building strategies you can practice when faced with difficult choices. They’ll help you navigate stressful decisions together as a team!
3 Ways to Navigate Stressful Decisions Together
- Remember that it’s “us,” not “you and me.”
- Rather than focus on the stress, dream about the possibilities.
- Try to come to full agreement before making a big decision.
Us Time Challenge
Pick a stressful decision you have to make and spend some time dreaming about the possibilities. Maybe even make a list of what good may come out of what you’re facing.
Team Us Resources
• Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
• FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
• Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
• Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
• Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
If you ask us why church is good for our marriage, Ted will most likely quip, “I met my wife at church. That was good for my marriage.” Wit aside, though, we take being an active member of our local church seriously. In the two decades since we first met, we’ve been purposeful as a couple in making regular church attendance and active participation a consistent part of our lives, and it’s benefited our relationship in many ways.
We believe church can be good for your marriage too. Listen in as we start by sharing why going to church matters. We’ll then give you five reasons church attendance and involvement can help you and your spouse grow closer.
5 Reasons Church Can Be Good for Your Marriage
- It provides shared experiences.
- It sparks conversation.
- It provides opportunities to serve together.
- It offers support and accountability.
- It fosters spiritual unity.
Us Time Challenge
This week, go to church together — whether it’s mid-week, small group, or Sunday morning — and notice specific ways it brings you closer together.
Team Us Resources
• Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
• FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
• Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
• Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
• Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
What do conflict, birthdays, Nehemiah, and buried issues have in common? We talk about them all in this episode! As we’ve said before, conflict in marriage is inevitable. And for us, disagreements have never been about whether or not we’ll have them, but how we deal with them when we do.
Listen in as we talk about practical ways to work together as a team to resolve disagreements. We’ll share how you learn to face conflict as allies, agree not to bury issues, and commit to respond rather than react.
3 Ways to Work Together to Resolve Disagreements
- Face discouragements as allies.
- Agree not to bury issues.
- Commit to respond, not react.
Us Time Challenge
Do a team-building activity together that has the potential to be frustrating at times. Maybe it’s an escape room or paddling a rowboat. Come up with something creative, fun, and relationship-strengthening!
Team Us Resources
• Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
• FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
• Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
• Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
• Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Some people might assume we’re some sort of communication experts because we both have master’s degrees in communication. But today we’re going to let you in on a not-so-secret truth. We aren’t. We studied communication because we knew we needed help. And, all these years later, we’re still learning.
Join us as we share some tools, tips, and techniques we’ve discovered. Listen in as we talk about how putting them into practice has helped us better communicate like a team. Hopefully, they’ll do the same for you!
4 Steps to Better Communicating as a Team
- Slow down.
- Listen well.
- Repeat often.
- Respond rather than react.
Us Time Challenge
Practice the four steps to better communicating as a team. Pick a moment where you might normally rush through communication, and instead, slow down, listen well, repeat often, and respond rather than react.
Team Us Resources
• Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
• FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
• Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
• Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
• Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Many couples believe that the intense romantic love that brings them together will keep them together long-term. And, while it’s true that these in-love emotions are exhilarating and worth savoring, you need more than feelings for your marriage to go the distance. It has to be based on more.
Listen in as we talk about marital culture shock and how obligation isn’t a dirty word. We share how it’s a true-to-our-promise commitment that serves as the best foundation for a healthy marriage and give you three things to remember when you don’t feel “in love.”
The 4 Stages of Marital Culture Shock
- The Honeymoon Stage
- The Frustration Stage
- The Adjustment Stage
- The Acceptance Stage
3 Things to Remember When You Don’t “Feel” In-Love
- You won’t break if you bend.
- Compatible couples have conflict.
- Bad habits take time to break.
Us Time Challenge
Figure out an area you can bend in this week. Don’t share it with your spouse. Instead, put it into practice and see if your spouse notices.
Team Us Resources
• Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
• FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
• Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
• Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
• Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
We often look at each other and say, “We’re so glad we have a boring marriage.” You might think that sounds crazy—and maybe it does! After all, boring isn’t the adjective most of us want to describe our marriages. But we’re not talking about boring as many of us narrowly define the term: dull, uninteresting, tiresome. We’re putting a new spin on the word!
Listen in as we share three things that characterize a boring marriage. You’ll also hear some practical ways you can have one. By the time we’re done, we hope you’ll see why boring marriages are underrated!
3 Characteristics of a Boring Marriage
- It’s a drama-free zone
- Commitment outweighs personal fulfillment
- No power-couple status required
3 Ways to Have a Boring Marriage
- Pick your “yeses” wisely
- Pick your comparisons wisely
- Pick your friends and advisors wisely
Us Time Challenge
Listen to Ben Rector’s song, “Crazy.” Plan an afternoon or evening together based on one of the “crazy” marriage moments he sings about.
Team Us Resources
• Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
• FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
• Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
• Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
• Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
We’ve gone on many fun dates in our twenty years of marriage! Listen in as we do a not-so-rapid-fire Q&A round sharing highlights from our top dates over the years. You’ll hear about our unplanned convertible ride through the desert, the time we flew kites in the park, our dinner date that included a lot of fake blood, and our evening in a castle.
Even though we’ve made it a priority over the years to date each other, we know that in certain seasons of life, it can be challenging to make date night a reality. Sometimes as couples, we can even wonder, “What’s the point? We’re already married!” But date night isn’t a luxury—it’s a necessity! Hear why we believe date night matters and learn creative and practical ways to make it a consistent reality in your marriage.
4 Practical Ways to Make Date Night a Reality:
- Determine together that date night is a necessity
- Be flexible on the when and how long of date night
- Adjust expectations to fit your current season of life
- Schedule weeknight dates to break up the monotony
Us Time Challenge
Plan a date for this week! Put it on the calendar and make it happen. If you’re not sure what to do or where to go, plan your date based on one of these categories we shared:
• Dinner Date
• Outdoor Date
• Special Occasion Date
• Event Date
• Home Date
Team Us Resources:
• Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
• FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Links Mentioned in This Episode:
• “Better Decisions” message from Chad Moore at Sun Valley Community Church (https://www.sunvalleycc.com/sermons/in-everything-you-do/better-decisions)
• 15 Fun Date Night Ideas That Won’t Break the Bank from Darlene Schacht (https://timewarpwife.com/20-date-night-ideas-dont-break-bank/)
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh:
• Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
• Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
• Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
It's taken us over a year to bring you season two of the Team Us podcast. But we’re finally back behind the mics, and we have a lot of good reasons why it’s taken us so long. Listen in as we share about our cross-country move, road-trip stops, house-building woes, and our impromptu lunch with Russians.
We’re not just reconnecting with you, though. We’re also sharing practical ways you can reconnect with your spouse. The busyness of life often leaves us as couples feeling disconnected or like we’re growing apart. But it doesn’t have to be this way! Learn four ways you can reconnect when life pulls you apart.
4 Practical Steps to Help You Reconnect
1.Check in
2.Course correct
3.Date each other
4.Go back to the beginning
Us Time Challenge:
This week, go back to the beginning. Rediscover something you enjoyed doing together when you first got married, and make time for it.
Team Us Resources
• Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/)
• FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)
Links Mentioned in This Episode
• What You Can Learn from History’s Most Infamous Couple: https://bit.ly/3Nmpghf
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
• Website (https://ashleighslater.com/)
• Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/)
• Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
We all want to finish well as couples, right? We sure do!
Well, it’s the daily decisions we make individually and together that influence how our marriages fare in the long run. Because of this, it’s important to be purposeful to live out the day-to-day in a way that positively affects the years to come.
So how can we keep moving toward the finish line united? Listen in as we share why right now matters to the long-term of your marriage. You’ll hear how the choices you make today affect your relationship tomorrow, next year, and even a decade from now.
2 Ways to Help You Finish Well
1. Make today’s decisions with a long-term perspective
2. Have a realistic view of your own weaknesses
Us Time Challenge
Visit a cemetery this week. Walk slowly through it and read the epitaphs. Think about your marriage as you do. What do you want those closest to you to say about your marriage when it’s wrapped up? What can you do now to help make that legacy a reality?
Team Us Resources:
Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage
FREE Team Us Study Guide
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh:
Website | Instagram | Facebook
Episode Image Credit: Getty/Tanya St
Today, we’re talking about how the friends we keep make a difference in our marriages. It’s not only important that as couples we have community, but also that we’re purposeful in whom we bring into our confidence.
So, we’re going to share what we call a “friendship inventory” you can do to make sure you’re confiding in the right people. It’s also a helpful tool to determine whether you’re being this kind of friend to others.
Plus, if you’re struggling to even have the right people in your life, we’ll share some ways you can seek out these kinds of friendships.
Friendship Inventory Questions:
1.Does this friend esteem marriage?
2.Does this friend view the opposite sex with respect?
3.Does this friend build up my marriage and not just me?
Ways to Develop Godly Friendships:
1.Join a church that values marriage
2.Get involved in that church
3.Become members of a small group
Us Time Challenge
Take the friendship inventory to see how you’re doing at being a friend who esteems marriage, respects the opposite sex, and builds up your friends’ marriages. Think about ways you can do better.
Team Us Resources:
Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage
FREE Team Us Study Guide
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh:
Website | Instagram | Facebook
Episode Image Credit: Getty/Nadya Ustyuzhantseva
We’ll tell you that having kids is well worth the effort. There’s nothing like it. We’ve found that God uses parenting to refine and change us in a way other things can’t. That said, parenting has been one of our most challenging team efforts yet.
Sometimes the different upbringings and different personalities we’ve brought to our marriage complicate rather than contribute to and enrich our parenting. We’ve had to work hard not to allow these areas of difference to divide us.
While we’re definitely not parenting experts, we’ve learned a few things along the way about how to parent together. So, listen in as we share three things you can do to better parent as a team.
3 Ways to Better Parent as a Team:
1. Appreciate each other’s perspectives
2. Learn from each other’s approaches
3. Actively support one another’s parenting choices
Us Time Challenge:
We know that we don’t want to use our words to tear each other down. The thing is, we can actually speak words of life. Think of some specific ways you can encourage your spouse as a parent, and build them up in the eyes of your children.
Team Us Resources:
Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage
FREE Team Us Study Guide
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh:
Website | Instagram | Facebook
Episode Image Credit: Getty/Oleksandra-Bezverkha
Sometimes we sit back and wonder how we made it through our weeping years. But here we are, still married, still friends, and still liking each other. It wasn’t easy to remain united when miscarriage, multiple job losses, debt, and a house that wouldn’t sell desperately fought to pull us apart. While an attitude of “us vs. the problem” helped, we realized we couldn’t stop with the idea of us against the world. We needed more.
Today, we’re talking about how to walk together through the really hard situations, seasons, and losses that we experience as couples. We’re looking at what we can do to remain a strong team during them. So, listen in as we share three practical things you can do to better brave sorrow together in your marriage.
4 Ways to Brave Sorrow Together:
- Refuse to play the blame game
- Face defeat together
- Allow freedom to grief differently from each other
- Point each other back to God’s character
Us Time Challenge:
Make a list of the ways God has been faithful to you as a couple. Tape it to your fridge or bathroom mirror as a reminder of His goodness even in difficulty.
Team Us Resources:
Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage
FREE Team Us Study Guide
Links Mentioned in This Episode:
Braving Sorrow Together: The Transformative Power of Faith and Community When Life Is Hard
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh:
Website | Instagram | Facebook
Episode Image Credit: Getty/Rudzhan Nagiev
For us, laughter and a sense of levity or lightheartedness has carried us through the years. Laughter has been, as Proverbs 17:22 says, “good medicine” for us. But laughter isn’t something that comes easily for all couples.
While we’re not experts on why other couples struggle to laugh together, we do know one of the reasons we can. It’s because we make intentional efforts to live out our marriage with unburdened hearts.
An unburdened heart is a lighthearted heart. Why? Because it’s one that’s not weighed down by grudges. It’s challenging to feel lighthearted and at ease in a marriage, if we’re keeping tallies on each other. If you want a lighthearted marriage, too, listen in as we share three guiding principles that we’ve found helpful.
3 Ways to Have a Lighthearted Marriage:
- Practice the 49 percent/51 percent policy
- Serve with no strings attached
- Have a common enemy
Us Time Challenge:
Actively look for an opportunity this week to give in on something small with your spouse. Put into practice our 49 percent/51 percent policy and see what happens.
Team Us Resources:
Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage
FREE Team Us Study Guide
Links Mentioned in This Episode:
The Benefits of Laughter article from Psychology Today
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh:
Website | Instagram | Facebook
Episode Image Credit: Getty/Cosmaa
Bilbo Baggins once referred to adventures as “nasty disturbing comfortable things that make you late for dinner.” In some ways, he’s right. Adventures aren’t simply exciting, thrill-seeking activities. They stretch us in ways that force us to change.
What does this have to do with conflict in marriage? Conflict is often uncomfortable and inconvenient. It disturbs our status quo and can even disrupt dinner plans…or gasp!…date nights. We often react like Bilbo and think, “Sorry, I don’t want any conflict, thank you. Not today.”
But it’s important that we work through conflict in healthy, team-building ways. When we choose to put our marriage’s long-term health and mission ahead of our individual agendas, it’s well worth the effort. Not only are we strengthening and deepening our relationship, but we’re also ultimately choosing to reflect Christ.
Listen in as we talk about conflict as an adventure, how to face your disagreements with a team-first perspective, and why your timing in resolving issues matters.
Strategies for Facing Conflict as a Team
1. Embrace conflict as an adventure
2. Trade a me-first perspective for a team-first perspective
3. Choose carefully how and when to work through conflict
Us Time Challenge
Think back to when you went on an adventure together. Talk about what was hard, but how you worked together to overcome the challenges. Discuss how that brought you together. Then talk about how you can apply some of the things you did to how you face conflict now.
Team Us Resources:
Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage
FREE Team Us Study Guide
Links Mentioned in This Episode: The Hobbit
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh:
Website | Instagram | Facebook
After we got married, we were surprised by how differently we celebrated holidays and birthdays. One of us loved to go big, while the other preferred to treat them like any other day. But, as we’ve slowly learned over the years, differences like that don’t have to divide us. When we approach them with the right attitude, they can unite us.
As a couple, our differences can serve as a great reminder that we need teamwork. We need unity, cooperation, and commitment. And, as we band together for the common good of our relationship, instead of focusing on the places where we feel disappointed or our likes rejected, it becomes easier for us to appreciate, and not despise, the other’s uniqueness.
What are some practical ways you can do this in your marriage? Listen in as we share three things we do so that our differences help us grow together and not apart.
3 Ways to Grow Together and Not Apart
1. Build on common interests
2. Don’t force change
3. Learn to stretch by trying new things
Us Time Challenge
Go on a date. You can either pick your favorite common interest that you share, or one of you can decide to try something the other enjoys. Plan this week’s date around it.
Team Us Resources:
Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage
FREE Team Us Study Guide
Links Mentioned in This Episode:
The Princess Bride
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh:
Website | Instagram | Facebook
From its inconceivable R.O.U.Ses to its iconic lines, the 1987 film The Princess Bride is a favorite at our house. For us, one of the most memorable characters is Inigo Montoya. His patience and persistence as he hunts for the six-fingered man remind us that it takes time to execute a “death wish.” But what does a “death wish” have to do with marriage?
While we joined a new team when we promised, “I do,” that doesn’t mean the unity and cooperation we talked about in episode 1 are going to be easy or automatic. It takes time after we get married to make that transition from “me” to “us.”
One reason is that all of us come to marriage with ingrained habits. These are the things that steal joy from our relationship, keep us from walking in unity and practicing cooperation, and can even weaken our resolve to stay committed. Listen in as we share three practical ways you can practice patience for the old as you and your spouse work together toward the new.
3 Ways to Practice Patience, Persistence, and Grace:
- Pick your battles (recognize the difference between our spouse sinning and our spouse just annoying us).
- Make a Communication Sandwich
- Focus on progress, not perfection
Us Time Challenge:
Take some time to make a list of a few ways you’ve noticed that the other has made progress in an area. Figure out a fun and creative way to affirm each other for their growth.
Team Us Resources:
Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage
FREE Team Us Study Guide
Links Mentioned in This Episode:
The Princess Bride
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh:
Website | Instagram | Facebook
Have you ever watched curling matches during the Winter Olympics? We have!
One year, we found ourselves hooked on this sport that’s nicknamed “chess on ice!” And, as we observed the strategy, intentionality, and sweeping that curling requires, we couldn’t help but compare it to marriage!
Every team, whether it’s in curling or in marriage, does better with a game plan. Yet, it’s the sweeping—or grace—that helps us as couples bring home the gold. Grace is to marriage what sweepers are to curling.
So, if you’re not sure what sweeping even is, listen in as we explain the basics of curling. We also chat about anime volleyball, and give you practical ways you can create a game plan for your marriage.
5 Game Plan Strategies for Your Team Us:
1. Literally get on the same page
2. Have a shared understanding of grace
3. Believe the best about each other
4. Play to each other’s strengths
5. Celebrate the victories, not the defeats
Take the "Us Time Challenge":
Like we did, schedule a time and place to literally get on the same page. Grab paper and pens and go to a park, a coffee shop, or sit down together at your dining room table. Spend some time writing down qualities you’d like to see better characterize your marriage. Talk about specific ways you can work toward each ideal.
Team Us Resources
Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage
FREE Team Us Study Guide
Links Mentioned in This Episode
Haikyu!!
Curling for Dummies Cheat Sheet
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh:
Website | Instagram | Facebook
Episode Image Credit: Getty/artbesouro
As a couple, we’ve had a lot of firsts! From the first time we met over 19 years ago to our first kind-of date to the first time we held hands. So, on this very first episode of the Team Us podcast, we share some of those firsts with you.
Yet we don’t stop there! We also talk about the very first human team—Adam and Eve.
They’re a duo we consider history’s most infamous couple. Because, as we all know, they really messed up. But here’s where our conversation might be different from a lot of what you usually hear about Adam and Eve. Our primary focus isn’t on how they messed up.
Listen in as we talk about them pre-fall and lay a foundation for what makes a good team. You’ll discover three “team us” qualities that characterized Adam and Eve’s marriage that you can practice too!
3 Qualities Every Team Us Needs:
1.Unity
2.Cooperation
3.Commitment
Us Time Challenge:
Set aside some time as a couple to enjoy a few episodes of The Amazing Race on your streaming service. Think about and discuss the following:
• Which teams are most successful?
• What qualities set them apart?
• Which teams do you find yourself cheering on the most? Why?
• How can you become more like the teams you admire?
Team Us Resources
Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage
FREE Team Us Study Guide
Links Mentioned in This Episode
The Amazing Race
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh:
Website | Instagram | Facebook
