Brine Weekly: Recent Episodes
Brine Weekly
Have a ton of vacation days but find your self-worth is tied entirely to your job? Want to have some free time to finally learn how to vape? Want to be able to examine your grandmother's shell collection in peace? Then try a workcation! It's like a vacation, but where you go to work!
Leave your house and get on a plane. Think about popular unaired sitcoms. Think about maybe losing some weight. Then get a little messy on alcohol-free mimosas and say some regrettable things to your S.C.U.B.A. instructor. Remember, it's an acronym, and the 'S' stands for 'sex.'
This week on Brine Weekly, two coal miners make several surprising discoveries about their world and themselves. Meanwhile, in Fever Ditch, Ohio, everyone spends the day at the beach selecting their favorite Beach Bod.
Healthman Cleanbody gives some more useful health tips, before we go to a lonely house somewhere in America's heartland, where two lonely traveling salesmen try to honor the glorious past of their ancient craft. Also, a man fucks a Jeep.
A wife sets out on her own, looking for answers. A great writer's life is remembered. A man puts on his daddy's ridin' boots. The Husky Boys are back in town.
This week on Brine Weekly, we put aside the joke-times and ha-has to discuss a very real issue: Jerkman's Disorder.
As we all know, life is a contest to see who can live to be the oldest and most decrepit. And let me tell you right now: you're losing.
Join us in a pitch black bathroom stall and we'll whisper secrets to each other. You know, secrets to be broadcast around the country. Then we can go get arrested by Boat Cop and celebrate our beautiful wedding with corpse fireworks. This description makes sense, right? I can't really tell anymore.
In honor of our steamy, saucy, 69th episode, we've put together a collection of the hottest sketches we could find.
Becoming a dad is a strange and difficult process, which is why all over the world dads gather to discuss their hopes and fears in a comforting and supportive environment. We take you to one such meeting. Later, you can sit with your dad and watch the 47-hour Baby Baphomet marathon together.
Paige's Pages returns for one last desperate hurrah, Gobbo invites you to join his fan club for a nominal fee, and we share EXCLUSIVE AUDIO retrieved from the highly private and embarrassing double sex therapy sess--wait, have we been here before?
Come in, come in. Lie down with me in this wildly swinging hammock. I have some questions to ask you. Hold on to these electrodes. They'll measure how conductive you are. No, don't worry about it. It's just electricity. It's good for you. Now, what's your earliest Garfield memory?
It's time to catch up with old friends, and order the usual: some fries, some dog food...you know, the usual. Just don't choke before your head melts.
This week, we take a trip to a very special place. Where a nominal fee can solve just about every problem. Where vaping by the retention pond is a town pastime. Where Big Dog shirts are considered business casual. Where a mayor saves up to buy a motorcycle, and with it...happiness? Welcome to Fever Ditch, Ohio
Corporations are people too, which is why we're bringing you this special all-corporate episode of Brine Weekly. Some companies make a lot of different household products that we use and enjoy every day. Some make featureless objects that you have to assemble yourself. And some just bring you pictures of big goofy weiners. They're all special and important parts of modern society, and their underrepresented voices deserve to be heard much more than your dumb voice does, loser.
Healthcare is a major issue facing our society today. Many people do not have access to healthcare and must try to get free treatment from their medical examiner friends. Others only have access to healthcare when it is too late all their family is lost at The Fight. The government should do something so that people can have healthcare. It is bad for people to die because they do not have healthcare, but, sadly, it does, happen every day, it seems. This and many other issues should be fixed by our congress and also president. In conclusion, someone should figure out what Lindsey Buckingham is doing and if he is nude.
What do online dating, sauce cults, and the weekend have in common? No, really, I'm asking you. I just want to find out. Please tell me! I've been trying to solve this riddle for 35 years!
This is not my beautiful, inescapable office. This is not my beautiful job as a parole officer. Dogs, wizards, food slurries, and the deceptive nature of FX's Justified discussed throughout.
If you're looking to spice up your sex life with a new computer, then have we got a deal for you! You'll just have to endure an oily handshake, some good (or possibly bad?) breath, and a baby that could bench press you. Either way, you're gonna spend about $9,000.
This week, we bring you a scene from a used book store. There is a woman, and a tiny man, and a large, loud man. Concepts and images are presented: the image of Ender from Ender's Game as Sonic the Hedgehog. A dollar bill worn as a tunic. Canings. A defunct book review radio program. Kangaroo milk. Enjoy.
What started out as a fun three hour tour for the squad turned into twelve years on Cop Island. This week: Deputy Razzle finds a HAM radio on the beach. Will this be the squad's salvation, or is it just an attempt by the Blue Crab Gang to identify the rat in their midst? Find out this week, on COP ISLAND.
It's important to clap so you can sync up everybody's tracks. It's important to do this every day, as frequently as possible.
EXCLUSIVE AUDIO retrieved from the highly private and embarrassing double sex therapy session of two total weirds. Also, order at a classic American diner and then diet off the calories with the help of ZORKON!
You're surrounded. A man is on acid jazz, and the Grape Ape wants to tell you his political opinions. You're surrounded. In stereo.
You meet in an inn, and embark on an epic quest to discover how Martha is doing, how you'll die 20 consecutive times, and various other facts about chests, cats, and ray guns.
Have you been to Germany? Have you REALLY? Are you willing to fight Gobbo for a crab brooch (worth 500G)? How much do you know about the lost alternate universe Seinfeld episodes? I thought so.
Dusty McClavin helps you get your chakras aligned for the new year. Paige's Pages returns with a new spin. And a chance meeting between two men chances again. All this and more...INSIDE YOUR COMPUTER.
The Libertine is back, and this time he's THIRSTY. Speaking of which, do you VAPE, bro? If you do, you may end up in the HOSPITAL, which is not a good place to spend THE NEW YEAR. Okay, I covered all the sketches. Can I go now? Please. Please, I'm so hungry. Please let me out. I just want to see my family agai--
We’re in hiding his week, so please enjoy Fritz Milchmacher’s classic sound experiment Yogurt Master. Actually, it’s by Michael Arthur (who also does our music).
It’s time to coat your family in yogurt and gather around the fire to get all crusty for the holidays. Bring along the sounds and smells of the midwest, a sexy slip-and-slide, and an escape pod. Just in case.
Celebrate the glorious locomotive! Trains move along a track! How delightful! O trains, our souls exalt in thee! Gouge them fully with your powerful pistons! Fill our stomachs with Hot Pockets and our OkCupid profiles with lies! Purchase us XXS men's pants at Lane Bryant! Amen.
This week we take you on a tour of some of our favorite graves, get some bad news from your doctor, and give you some tips on where to put your drum kit. Plus a promotional message from the local Dildo Emporium.
A Brinesgiving special mega-Brine! Join us at the table in complete darkness with our effigy of Ansapin and painting of Multimouth as we feast on cheese curd and raw chicken. It's holidays!
How do you lose a son? How do you waste $61 million? How do you create the universe? How can we agree on anything? These answers, and a surprising French Lick, this week on Brine Weekly.
Let yourself go cuckoo-nutso from the power of acid jazz this week as we take you on a crazy trip through the world of convenience stores, eBay stores, gin that makes you feel bad, and square dogs.
Flirt with danger by engaging in CRIMES in this week's episode. Live vicariously through the crimes of others. Commit crimes using only your thoughts. Think about your dome. Listen to ska. It's ALL dangerous.
Our friends at BFRA Cynergy Solutions are dedicate to fulfilling all your needs, from all your important garage tools to delicious and refreshing children's juice-style beverages. Also, another excerpt from Hemingway and Faulkner's correspondence, a word from Tostitos, and much more.
Shocktober nears its end, and we all swallow our Placebrex to remain calm while learning about the deeper mysteries of Frasier. Meanwhile, a shady deal goes wrong.
Shocktober continues as we share a very dark and ominous night dream, reveal the hidden history of Goosebumps, and some easy tips on staying healthy.
Show your patriotism by joining us in our tribute to the national anthem of the Philippines. Also, we continue our celebration of Shocktober by sharing an intimate conversation between a witch and her beloved niece. Plus, the Things are listed.
Dusty returns from his meditation retreat with the feeling he forgot about something. Maybe he should be checking his voicemail more often. Meanwhile, Miranda Boxawine returns with another very special Sugar and Spite, and we get some advice about dining out.
Blowtember continues with a special announcement from the Explodin' Corpse Celebration Hut. Also: Dusty McClavin gets some interesting news from his tree-removal service, a businessman has a change of heart, a useful new telephone service is announced, and Father and Son return to the Fight once again.
This Week, we examine the work of art in the age of its technological reproducibility and also Pappy’s Banjo Hour.
This week on Brine, we check in with the soothing-voiced Walt Wordington to learn where some words come from and nothing else will happen.
This week on Brine we celebrate the particular sexual and emotional needs of aunts everywhere, catch up on some of the most important word-style news, and learn a little bit about an alien society. BONUS: GarfScarf
It's the 33rd episode and the 33rd of July, and you know what that means: it's Wyrm Day! This week we bring you live coverage of the great wyrm's emergence from the center of the Earth as well as a variety of viewpoints on the vagaries of human sexuality. And of course some light comedy from ya boy, Ritchie Davenport!
Things take a turn this week as your lover envelops you in her damp, stained leather sheets, some disturbing truths about Ghostbusters are revealed, and the cosmic forces vying for Dusty McClavin's soul really get serious. Hope you've tied your shoes securely.
Everyone agrees you should be very mindful about the things you put in your body. But there's so much conflicting advice about what those things should be! Is it better to purge toxins or increase your toxin intake? Is it better to eat the same food all year round or not eat any food at all when nothing's in season? Are clams an aberration in the eyes of the Golden Cormorant? WHO EVEN KNOWS ANYMORE?
The state of constantly increasing entropy in the universe is the theme this week. Dusty McClavin nears his breaking point, morning talk radio recognizes the futility of existence, Garfield fan conventions proliferate across the globe, and women everywhere emit odorless fluid from their buttholes once a year. It's a terrifying, meaningless world out there, friends. Have fun. :)
Praise Ansapin and welcome to this week's blessed installment of Brine Weekly, ranked by Consumer Reports as the holiest podcast on iTunes! We'd like to tell your more about our One Weird Religion! And that's what we do! In this episode! We'll also tell you about our Many Weird Diets and Things We Came Out to Our Parents About! For more information, check out http://www.oneweirdreligion.biz!
Welcome to Pennsylvania. Check your teeth, put on some comfy pants, say your sorry, order some breakfast, and enjoy with some popular sitcoms. Relax, Ringo is here.
The HORSE Corporation would like you to apologize sincerely for causing your HORSE to be enraged by guzzling energy drinks, throat-singing, and engaging in activities with your car.
We here at Brine care about all the major issues: the damage idealized Western masculinity inflicts on both men and women within our society; horses; and also fart machines. And we address two of those three issues within this episode.
Sorry, this is a private party. Oh, really? You do? Well, come right in then. Here's Ernest Hemingway. And there's a secret tunnel to a small town Michigan subway system. This right here is Sxhuring. Cool, huh? And that over there, that's The Fight.
We take a brief look into the future, a longer one into the past, and investigate one of the major issues America's youth are dealing with today in this striking, socially conscious episode of Brine Weekly. Also, how DOES a horse eat corn?
One thing we've learned is that if you want something done right, you gotta either do it yourself, or buy it on Etsy. So this week we bring you the exquisite crafts of the Uromancer, the unique stick-to-it-iveness of a hero detective, trucker wine, and denim tampons. That'll be $40 and we'll ship it to you in eight weeks.
Celebrate your relationships this week. When your loved one dies, arrange to have them exploded while you're asleep. Remember that powerful witch you offended? No? Well, have WE got a surprise for you! Plus a review of the newest Convoy movie and a poem about baseball. WHAT THE HECK IS MORE PATRIOTIC THAN THAT
Now that you've been acceptably contained, they can subject you to all the things it is commonly agreed are good for you. Such as the fine products produced by BFRA Cynergy Solutions Inc., listing techniques, the miracle product Peb, and the educational properties of "Convoy."
Celebrate the mystical world around us with this week's exciting installment of Brine Weekly! Our good friend Dusty McClavin provides more tips on harnessing our chi, we teach you how to be a Twitter whiz, and bring you a spell-by-spell commentary for this year's biggest wizard blood sport tournament. All while not mentioning the BONE ZIGGURAT.
On the sixth week our Lord rose again from the dead and galloped His way into our hearts. Then we discovered that our interest in wig sex is considered "vanilla" in the fetish community and dejectedly headed home to get caught up the latest episode of "Lewis" and write lists for our therapists. And now you know the REST of the story.
Facts are dangerous. Facts can land you in an ambiguously Soviet prison. Actually, almost anything can land you in an ambiguously Soviet prison, especially when you live in an ambiguously Soviet location, hang around with unsavory characters, and are also completely delusional. It's really a tough gig altogether.
The world is a mysterious place, driven by invisible and unknowable forces and interactions, which is why you should spend more time in your basement, considering your long-term storage options, positioning carpet squares, and maintaining your sump pump.
Contact your inner child and ask them what they want. The truth may surprise you. Snap a quick photo of your genitalia. The truth may surprise you. Where has Ms. Frizzle gotten herself this time? The truth may surprise you.
Fire demons hate her! Suburban housewife discovers how to enhance your chi and gain confidence in the workplace using this one weird trick!
This week we bring you: Culture and Serenity. There is a peace that comes with accepting your lot in life. Accepting your sons' horrific boating accident deaths. Accepting that you will always be a small-town high school football coach. Accepting that you are considering what wine to pair with the huge bag of circus peanuts you're eating. We want you to be at peace. So does Jesus. We asked him.
Parts of this episode have been censored due to extreme violations of our society's moral standards. We apologize for this inconvenience, and hope it does not curtail our otherwise very important message.
Ten years ago we had Jobs, Cash, and Hope and now we have Horror, Synergy, the NASDAQ, Polka, Kazakhstan, Ham, and Orson Welles. Just wanted to point it out, I guess.
Please choose the username that suits you: 1. BallBuster_67, 2. BallBuster_68, 3. BallBuster_70, 4. BallBuster_71, 5. BallBuster_72, 6. BallBuster_73, 7. BallBuster_74, 8. BallBuster_75, 9. BallBuster_76...
You know when you want to listen to the radio in your car but all that's on is shitty country songs about astronauts, ads for local restaurants, and long descriptions of what happened at a cat show 17 years ago? Yeah, it's like that.
We sneak a peek at Dick Chipper's personal hell, get a behind-the-scenes look at the recording of a real, live cowboy song, sort of skip past News Street Journal, and get another hefty dose of linguistic learnin' from Walt Wordington.
Your trusted pal Doctor Telephone makes a "house call", Coca-Cola announces its initiative to help polar bears, Poppy and Doug have a difference of opinion, and your local barista came into your house while you were asleep last night.
A special message for all those who need firework spectaculars to truly experience their grief, your week's critical news, STONED JOKES, and an opportunity to get to know the English language better with Walt Wordington.
Do not touch the GIANT METAL APE, participate in an Olympics, get a skull transplant, or go to the Bass Pro Shop Superstore inside the pyramid. These are non-wholesome activities. You should only drink Fritz Beer, because it's safe to drink.
A special message brought to you by BRANDS. Also, the News Street Journal features a double serving of Cathy as Zack continues his two-week meditation on death and the nature of human violence.
Cathy and guest anchor Max Eddy explore the newest work of popular street artist Banksy, fruit fly fight clubs, Joe Biden's latest antics, farm espionage, and 2-3 other things!
Cathy and Zack cover the week's hottest news, including missing Pope's blood, the latest on Syria, Iran's "Cool Cities" campaign, childbirth trends, and also some other things!
Cathy and Zack bring you all the information your require for the week of January 20th, 2014.
Cathy and Zack bring you all the information your require for the week of January 13th, 2014.