The Christian Working Woman: Recent Episodes
Mary Lowman
The Christian Working Woman with Mary Lowman exists to encourage, equip and empower workplace Christians in the marketplace.
How would you like to work with someone who resents you, is jealous of you, and treats you rudely? That’s what our friend Fran is facing on her job. Jenny, a new coworker, has been asked to work under Fran’s supervision, but her jealousy and resentment have become obvious to the boss, Marilyn.
While Marilyn is having a private talk with Jenny, Fran is in her office praying for guidance. She told God if he wants her to relinquish this new account to Jenny, she will do so.
In a few minutes Marilyn walks into her office. “Fran, I explained to Jenny that I make the business decisions here, and I reminded her she was fully informed of what her status would be when she requested the transfer here. So, she’s agreed to work with you on this account. If you have any problem, you let me know.”
“Marilyn,” Fran says, “I’m willing to give her the account if you want me to. But I’m not sure how easy it’s going to be for us to work together.”
“There’s no way I’m going to let you give up that account. You won it, and it’s yours. And if anybody can work with Jenny, you can, Fran.” And with that Marilyn goes back to her office.
Since it’s almost quitting time, Fran heads for the door just as Jenny is leaving. “Jenny,” Fran says, “I know you’re not happy with this latest arrangement. I can understand how you feel…”
“Oh, give me a break, Fran. You don’t understand or care how I feel,” Jenny comes back with great anger. “Just don’t think I’m going to do all the dirty work.”
“Jenny, please,” Fran begins, “I even offered to give you the account, but Marilyn insists we can work together. I certainly want to try.”
“You offered to give me the account?” Jenny is incredulous. “I don’t believe it. You’re just trying to make points with Marilyn. Just don’t expect me to do your work for you, Fran.”
Fran recognizes there is no way she can have a rational conversation with Jenny, so she goes to her car and heads home. The tears start to come. “Lord, what am I going to do?”
What is Fran going to do? There’s no happy ending to this story. Fran cannot turn Jenny around, and as they work together, Jenny increases her attacks on Fran. Many times, Fran is tempted to go to Marilyn and tell her what’s happening, but each time she has a check in her spirit. She spends many miserable days trying to work with Jenny.
Finally, Jenny resigns her position and leaves the company, full of bitterness and anger.
“It’s so sad,” Fran says to the Lord, “and I feel bad for her. But Lord, what more could I do?”
Anger is cruel and fury overwhelming, but who can stand before jealousy (Proverbs 27:4).
Not every story has a happy ending, even when we obey the Lord and do what he tells us to do. But we can trust the results to him.
Jealousy can cause any of us to do and say things that are hurtful and wrong. Fran is learning first-hand how the jealousy of a coworker can be very painful.
Jenny is jealous of Fran because of her success in the company. Now with a new account Fran has just signed up, it appears Marilyn is going to assign Jenny to work with Fran on it. For Fran, it’s the worst possible news she could hear, because Jenny has been openly arrogant and rude to Fran.
As she and Jenny go into Marilyn’s office, Jenny says to Fran, “If you think I’m going to take orders from you, think again, Fran. I know more about this account than you will ever know.”
Fran has no opportunity to respond, as Marilyn walks in at that moment. “Well, it seems to me,” Marilyn says, “you two are a perfect match to work on the Edwards account, since you have a lot of good experience with construction companies, Jenny.”
The silence is deafening. Nobody says anything. Marilyn continues, “I am right, am I not, Jenny? You had a large construction account in Atlanta?”
“I certainly did,” Jenny begins, “much larger than this one.” The anger in her voice is obvious.
“I see,” Marilyn says, beginning to sense there is a problem here. “Do you have a problem working with Fran on this account?”
“Well, truthfully, I think Fran should be working with me on the account, Marilyn, seeing how I know this business much better than she does,” Jenny says. She is beginning to lose control. “I think you should just let me handle this account. That would make the best business sense.”
“I see,” says Marilyn. “So, you don’t want to work with Fran on the account?”
“Like I said,” Jenny begins again, “I think she should…”
“I know,” Marilyn continues, “you think she should work for you. We better have a talk about this. Fran, would you excuse us please?”
As Fran walks back to her office, she is literally shaking. Fran prays, “Lord, do you want me to just volunteer to give her the account?” A battle goes on inside of Fran as she wrestles with this issue. She prays and fumes and thinks, and finally she says, “Lord, I can’t stand Jenny, and there’s no way I could give her this account. But if you want me to do it, I can do it for you. So, right now I relinquish the control and I’m willing to do what you want me to do. Just show me.”
And with that, she sits quietly. Her spirit calms down, and the peace of God descends upon her—that peace that passes understanding. As soon as she lets go of her rights and gives the Lord permission to do his will, she can relax. Now she is in a win-win situation.
It’s difficult to let go, isn’t it? But letting go and giving God the control always brings peace.
We continue our most recent story of Fran and Jesus on the Job. Fran finds herself on the receiving end of a jealous coworker, who is very vocal and very vicious in her attitude toward Fran.
A week ago, Fran made an important presentation to a new prospect, and today is the day she is to get their answer. This morning, in some quiet time with the Lord, Fran prays, “Lord, once again I give over to you the results of this new business. I pray you will give me a favorable response, but no matter what happens, help me to be gracious and kind.”
Then she thinks about Jenny. Fran has struggled to have a right attitude toward her, because Jenny has said some unkind and rude things to Fran. “Lord, I know Jenny is not in my life by accident. I don’t like her, Lord, but I want to be willing to let you love her through me. And Lord, help me to see her the way you see her. I know underneath her tough exterior and her angry demeanor, there is a big hurt only you can heal. Please help me to see her through your eyes.”
About ten o’clock that morning, Fran makes the call and to her great delight, she learns they will sign a contract with her. She makes an appointment to be at their office first thing tomorrow morning, then goes in to tell her boss.
“Congratulations, Fran,” Marilyn says, as she shakes her hand. “That is great news. We’ll announce it at the meeting this afternoon.” Marilyn is obviously pleased.
As the department gathers for the meeting, Marilyn enthusiastically announces Fran’s success. “This is a very significant account, and Fran did a great job to land it. Obviously, she’ll be needing help from the team. In fact, Jenny, since you’ve had some experience with construction companies, it might make sense for you to help Fran out. We can talk about that.”
Fran’s stomach does a couple of somersaults. How could Marilyn do that to her? She can never work with Jenny. Now what is she going to do?
As the meeting ends, everybody is congratulating Fran. Jenny starts to walk out without saying anything, when Marilyn stops her. “Jenny, why don’t you and Fran come into my office for a few minutes. Let’s talk about this new account.”
“Lord,” Fran prays silently, “I need wisdom, and I need grace. Please help me. You know I can’t work with Jenny. Please deliver me.”
She can hear that inner voice of God’s Spirit responding to her panic. “What you can’t do, I can.” With that assurance, she heads toward Marilyn’s office.
Solomon wrote: Anger is cruel and fury overwhelming, but who can stand before jealousy (Proverbs 27:4).
Who indeed? Fran is discovering just how dangerous it is to work with a jealous coworker. A woman named Jenny transferred to Fran’s office and accepted a lower position. She has become more and more vocal about how over-qualified she is for her job.
Today Fran and her good friend, Louise, are walking to the cafeteria when Jenny walks in behind them. Fran and Louise have tried unsuccessfully to be friendly to Jenny, but they try once again. “Want to join us for lunch?” Louise asks.
“Yeah, why not,” Jenny responds. As they sit down to eat, Jenny says to Fran, “You had a presentation today, didn’t you, Fran?”
“Yeah, we’re trying to get the Edwards Construction account,” Fran replies.
Jenny says, “I landed the largest construction company in the Southeast when I worked in Atlanta, you know.”
Fran can feel the anger start to creep up within her. She sends up a wordless prayer before she responds. “I wish I had known, Jenny. I could have used your help.”
“Well, they should have let me have that account,” Jenny says. “I’ve got the experience that would have guaranteed we would get it. How did the presentation go?”
It’s all Fran can do to answer Jenny with a civil tone of voice. “I really couldn’t tell. They said it would be a week before they decide.”
Louise is angry, too, and she just can’t sit there without defending her friend. She says, “I can assure you, if anyone can get that account, Fran can. I’m sure you did a great job, Fran.”
Jenny laughs and says, “Well, Louise, I’d expect you to say that about your good friend, but I’m looking at it from a business perspective. With my experience, I would have done a better job.”
“Excuse me,” Louise retorts, “but that’s your opinion and you ought to keep it to yourself.”
“Oh, Louise, don’t take everything so personal. I’m just saying it like it is,” Jenny replies.
“I call that rude,” Louise says.
“Hey,” Fran interjects, “this conversation is getting out of hand. Thanks for your loyalty, Louise, but Jenny has a right to her opinion. Maybe we better get back to work.”
As they start to leave, Jenny says, “You know, it’s stupid for women to be so emotional about these things. I’m just talking business, and you two keep taking it personal.”
Fran and Louise walk away without another word to Jenny, but steam is coming out of Louise’s ears. “Can you believe that woman? She’s just jealous of you, Fran.”
And jealousy can be dangerous.
Have you ever worked with someone who was jealous of you? In Fran and Jesus on the Job, Fran discovers a coworker is not only jealous of her but seeks to ruin her. As I periodically present these stories of Fran and Jesus, it is my prayer you will be encouraged to practice the presence of Jesus on your job and seek his guidance in every situation you face.
On this Wednesday morning, Marilyn, Fran’s boss, comes into her office and says, “Fran, I want you to meet Jenny. She just transferred here from our Atlanta office, and she’ll be working with Phil as his assistant.”
“Glad to meet you,” Fran says, as she extends her hand. “If I can help in any way, let me know.”
“Yes, Jenny, you can always count on Fran. She’s one of our best account reps, so she knows the ropes well,” Marilyn adds.
“That’s nice,” Jenny says, “but I can hold my own. I…uh…I was sales leader in the Atlanta office last year, but I had to transfer out here because my husband took a new job, so…”
“Well,” Marilyn chimes in, “we just didn’t have a sales slot for Jenny right now, but I’m sure something will open up before too long.”
“I sure hope so,” Jenny says. “I didn’t put in all that hard work as an account rep to work as an assistant.” It is obvious Jenny is not happy with her current assignment.
As they leave, Fran thinks: She acts like she’s too good to have that job. I think she’s going to be trouble. But as soon as she starts that kind of thinking, the Spirit of God convicts her. “I’m sorry, Lord,” she prays quietly, “forgive me for thinking of her in negative ways. Help me to have the right attitude toward her.”
Fran is learning a very important principle about dealing with people. When you are working with someone you don’t particularly like, don’t allow yourself to indulge in derogatory thoughts about the person. Instead, pray for him or her. Every time you are tempted to think unkind thoughts about the person, just stop right in the middle and change those thoughts to a prayer. Pray for your attitude toward the person and pray for him or her.
I don’t know about you, but I find I can easily make commitments. I can decide I really want to do something and set my mind to do it. But if I don’t have a plan as to how it gets done, it just remains good intentions that usually don’t become reality. So, what I’m hoping is that you will not only be inspired to reflect Christ more on your job, but you’ll have some specific actions that will make a difference in your life and in your workplace.
So, here’s my fourth suggestion (view part one for the first three suggestions) as to how we can more perfectly reflect Christ on our jobs:
- Be Transparent and Vulnerable
Jesus gave us clear instructions as to how we are to live as Christ-followers in our worlds. In Matthew 5:14-16 we read from his sermon on the mount:
You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.
In other words, we’re not called to be undercover Christians. Even in our post-Christian culture, Jesus’ challenge does not change. We are not to hide our lamp—our witness—as Christ-followers, and that includes on our jobs. The challenge we face is how to do that naturally, organically, and not in an unnecessarily offensive way.
Someone has said that too often we Christians are more interested in giving out the right news instead of the good news. We believe we’re right, based on God’s Word, and we never compromise those beliefs. But we do it through being real, not with a know-it-all attitude or arrogance of any kind.
You and I must be approachable, real, and transparent in the way we live if we ever hope to have influence in our world today. If you project a plastic image to those around you, an image of “I’ve got this all figured out, and my life is always together,” then who can ever relate to you?
Let me ask you: Do you fake happiness even when you are sad about something? Do you share personal struggles and concerns with coworkers appropriately? Can you and do you naturally talk about how God has helped you through hard times, how he has answered your prayers?
Are you willing to be vulnerable, admit your mistakes, or talk about your struggles? Or are you trying not to show a trace of doubt or misgivings or let anyone see the pain in your life? If so, you are putting up a barrier between you and others, and they just don’t know how to relate to someone who seems to always be in control! Living a transparent and authentic life means being yourself, without any pretensions.
There was a woman who worked for me many years ago who was just always perfect. She was vocal about her faith, but she was also vocal about how perfectly she did her job. She subtly would let everyone else know they should be like her and do their work like she did. Now, she was an excellent worker, but she made everyone else in the department uncomfortable by her perfectionist demeanor. I often wondered what she was like at home with her husband. And I noticed that she really had no connections in our office; she worked in an isolated atmosphere. That’s never going to be an effective way to reflect Christ.
So, one powerful way you and I can reflect Christ—be like Jesus—in our workplaces is to be transparent, inviting, and willing to share our lives, the good and the bad, with others.
- Reflect Christ by Developing the Fruit of the Spirit
I come to the fifth suggestion for reflecting Christ on your job, and it is to consistently display the fruit of God’s Spirit in your life. Honestly, this is an impossible assignment until and unless you become intentional about bearing much fruit. In John 15:8 Jesus said, This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples. Showing ourselves to be disciples of Jesus Christ is another way of saying we reflect Christ, and we do that by bearing much fruit.
This fruit is clearly defined in Galatians 5:22-23a as love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. It is proof the Holy Spirit controls your life, and you are like Jesus. To the world around you, it contrasts with the normal dog-eat-dog world in which everyone is out for themselves. This fruit grows when we pursue God, have daily time with him, pray this fruit into our lives, and cooperate with the Holy Spirit, who will empower us to grow much fruit.
Years ago, as I contemplated how I could make this a reality in my life, I read in Colossians 3 that we are to “put on” these characteristics of Jesus. That gave me a practice that helped me be more intentional about bearing this fruit in my life, becoming more like Jesus. I began to pray on each of these characteristics each morning, thinking of dressing myself spiritually for the day ahead. I prayed through them individually, focusing on the ones which gave me the greatest struggle.
For example, forbearance or patience doesn’t come easy for me. So, I prayed about it regularly and still do! And as I prayed for this fruit, the Holy Spirit reminded me throughout the day when I failed. He also showed me opportunities to reflect Christ by demonstrating the fruit of the Spirit—such as showing love to someone I worked with or allowing God’s Spirit to keep me peaceful during disagreements or difficult situations. Honestly, there were many times I could hear that inner voice of God warning me, “Be careful, show patience.” Or “That wasn’t such a kind thing to say.” Eventually I wrote a Bible study entitled “The Well Dressed Christian,” which goes into detail on how to focus intentionally on wearing those beautiful garments—the fruit of God’s Spirit—and pray them into our lives.
And here’s the thing: When you and I consistently reflect Christ in our lives by bearing this fruit of love and joy, goodness and faithfulness, peace and gentleness, our lights shine in our world. We reflect Christ. It is a natural outcome of bearing much fruit, and it opens so many doors of opportunity to talk about Jesus and explain the good news—forgiveness and a new life.
As a footnote, let me quickly admit there are many days and ways I don’t reflect Christ as I should. Bearing much fruit is a never-ending challenge, but I know from experience that we have the power through God’s Spirit within us to be more and more like Jesus.
I certainly don’t want to make it sound like the Christian life is a matter of following a certain formula. No two lives are alike, and God deals with us differently, that’s for sure. But for most if not all of us, growing in our knowledge of God and becoming more like Jesus requires us to be intentional about it—to instill good habits in our lives that help us reflect Christ to a dying, hurting world.
Presented by Lauren Stibgen
In this digital age, it feels like our community is giant! Some days it feels like I have a community of a thousand friends. Honestly, if I ever heard from one of you listening today personally, I am sure it would be like chatting with a lifelong acquaintance! I feel the same when someone reaches out via social media or on LinkedIn to connect about our faith or even a business matter. But truly, how many “friends” can we have?
In my opinion, the current workplace culture has us thinking about relationships all wrong. All these different professional groups and networking meetings bring new contacts, but are they true connections? How often are we trading time with a network for true, authentic connection?
I say get small! What do I mean by this? Take a sheet of paper. I want you to write down a list of your deep, authentic connections. These are the friends you pray with, laugh with, cry with. The ones you go to for good, biblical advice. These friends know your favorites in life. The good and bad. You should want not only to receive from them but also to give to them in return. How many are on your list? Can you count them easily or did you quickly fill a sheet top to bottom?
Jesus held 12 closest to him—the disciples. Surely, he did daily life with others whom he was closest to like Mary, Martha, and Lazarus, but those in his inner circle were fewer than 20. Although Luke says he had a larger group of around 70, this was more of the community around him—think of people who you are friendly with at work or even at church.
Going back to your list, who are your inner, most sacred connections? Who are your 12? Who make up your 20? How can you build deeper connections with those closest to you? Maybe some of these connections have come from work—some could be family, and others from church. Building connections and relationships is important to Jesus, and I want all of you to be encouraged if perhaps you aren’t finding this community and connection at work.
Those of us who are connected in the community of the Body of Christ can be encouraged that God has brought us into his family. Another song for this week: What a Friend we Have in Jesus! Above all, of the friends you have written down on your paper today, write JESUS in big letters at the top!
Presented by Lauren Stibgen
As we talk about social connections and community at work, I have been talking about some of the more difficult aspects of this connection—not fitting in, feeling lonely, being exhausted. One common workplace issue I hear from many women is the loss of workplace connection due to betrayal.
We can feel betrayed in many ways. Maybe you learn you have suddenly become the topic of office gossip, or a colleague is speaking poorly about your performance to a superior. It could even be you are suddenly left out of lunch or happy hour invitations or other gatherings you would typically attend. If you aren’t sure about what has caused you to be the odd “woman” out, this can make the feelings sting even more.
Joseph was betrayed deeply by his brothers because of their deeply-rooted jealousy. They were so jealous they thought to kill him but chose to sell him to slavery instead. Joseph was then betrayed by the wife of his employer who lied and said he was making a pass at her! The story of Joseph is in the book of Genesis chapters 37-50.
Let’s consider Joseph for a moment. Being his Dad’s favorite wasn’t his fault, but it surely didn’t help him. Are you a favored employee at work? Maybe this favoritism made the young Joseph a little prideful. He sometimes recounted his dreams about ruling over his brothers. If you are that favored employee, are you humble or prideful about it?
Like young Joseph’s brothers, perhaps your colleagues are jealous, but they also don’t like how you are responding to all the positive attention you are receiving. Maintaining humility and recognizing the achievements of your colleagues, contributes to a balanced approach to success in the workplace.
In Joseph’s later years, the betrayal by the wife of his employer was not his fault. My point is sometimes you just cannot control what someone says about you, and this is very hard.
Through all this betrayal, Joseph looked to the Lord. He trusted God’s plans for his life, even when he was alone in a pit, sold as a slave, and placed in prison for something he clearly did not do.
If you suddenly find yourself on the outs with workplace friends, carefully reflect and look to the Lord in prayer. Turn to a connection outside of work to help you consider how you may approach the situation with care, as a follower of Jesus. Rather than rushing to a judgement, prepare to ask some questions and seek to understand.
Presented by Lauren Stibgen
We have been talking about how much time we spend at work—one-third of our waking hours—and the social friendships and connections we may or may not have there. Like me, you may be just too exhausted to even think about being social at work! After all, sometimes these connections require even more of your time, and your calendar outside of work can be just as busy.
Spending time with other Christian working women reminds me all working women—Christian or not—feel the burdens of the elusive work/life balance more than their male counterparts. A 2024 Gallup poll found 51% of women compared to 39% of men feel stressed at work.[1] Women are more likely to juggle personal items during work hours, which also adds to this. Women are balancing work, caregiving, health, and perhaps additional education opportunities making their days long. Making time for more social connections often feels like another thing they just cannot add to their day.
Being too exhausted to engage socially is impacting more than just social connections for women; it is also impacting their opportunities for promotion. A study by Leanin.org found women are less likely to be promoted than men, partly because they participate less in informal social interactions.[2]
Our Savior Jesus was sometimes too exhausted for more social engagement too! Hebrews 4:15 reminds us we have a high priest who is able to sympathize with our weaknesses. Jesus experienced weariness too. In fact, his exhaustion is one of the things that lead to the interaction with the woman at the well.
Jacob’s well was there, and Jesus, tired as he was from the journey, sat down by the well. It was about noon (John 4:6).
Jesus had sent the disciples ahead to bring back food to him, and he was alone. Wearied in the Bible refers to deep physical and emotional exhaustion. We know Jesus was facing both. And I am sure this resonates with you. Your physical body and emotional state are just gassed.
Knowing Jesus felt the same way, what habits did he engage? Jesus went to his Father for refreshment. We see this repeatedly in the gospels.
Luke 5:16 and 6:12 tell us Jesus withdrew and went up to a mountain to be in prayer with God. We also read this in Mark 1:35.
When you feel too exhausted to connect socially, connect with God in prayer. Take time to bring your burdens to the Lord. Pray for the right connections and interactions. Pray for balance and refreshment. Pray for the right opportunities at work. After all, God is your best social interaction.
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[1] Barry, K. (2024, December 4). More Than a Program: A Culture of Women’s Wellbeing at Work. Gallup.com; Gallup. https://www.gallup.com/workplace/653843/program-culture-women-wellbeing-work.aspx
[2] Women in the Workplace. (n.d.). Lean In. Retrieved September 29, 2025, from https://leanin.org/women-in-the-workplace/2018/women-get-less-support-less-access-at-work
Presented by Lauren Stibgen
With one-third of our life spent working, it is no wonder we seek friendship and connection from our colleagues. A recent Forbes article from March 2024 titled How Loneliness Can Impact Your Job (And Life) by Tracy Brower says 69% of employees report they are unsatisfied with their social connections at work, and 43% don’t feel a sense of connection with their colleagues.[1] Loneliness is universal, and it doesn’t hold a title or age. CEOs and assistants are equally impacted by these feelings of disconnection. Since it is subjective, we need never negate our own personal feelings of loneliness or those feelings of a colleague.
As followers of Jesus, what does this mean for us? First, what if we are the employee feeling dissatisfied with our social connection at work? Turning to the Word of God can remind us it is our God who sees us in our daily work even when we feel alone.
Consider when the woman at the well went to draw water. She went in the middle of the day, the hottest time. Although we are not told about her feelings, we know she went alone because she likely was not accepted by the other Samaritan women. She was alone, and perhaps lonely when she encountered Jesus. He knew the intimate details of her not so perfect life and offered her living water—salvation in him! You can read this story in John 4:4-30.
And, what about Hagar? She was sent away, pregnant and alone when she was met by God and felt seen. Read more about Hagar in Genesis 16.
The woman at the well and Hagar are reminders that even when we are walking alone, God sees us.
Maybe you aren’t lonely at work. You have a wonderful social community! As a follower of Jesus, we are called to see others. Just as Jesus saw the woman at the well and God saw Hagar, who do you see in your workplace who could use some social connection?
There is a Christian song by Brandon Heath, Give Me Your Eyes with perfect lyrics: “Give me your eyes for just one second, give me your eyes so I can see…”[2] Take a listen. It can encourage you to see those in your workplace that could use you extending your care and connection in that moment!
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[1] Brower, T. (2024, March 21). How Workplace Loneliness Can Impact Your Job (And Life). Forbes. https://www.forbes.com/sites/tracybrower/2024/03/21/how-workplace-loneliness-can-impact-your-job/
[2] Heath, B., & Ingram, J. (2008). Give Me Your Eyes [Song]. In What If We [Album]. Reunion Records.
Presented by Lauren StibgenWe all spend so much time at work. In fact, on average, we will spend about 90,000 hours working over the span of our lifetime. This is one-third of all our waking hours! Given how much time we spend in our workplaces, it is not surprising we want to find community and relationships at work. We can develop friendships that last. While statistics vary between 70-85%, on average, most workers report they have some kind of friendship at work. The statistics are lower for the reporting of a best friend, down to 50%.What if you are a person in the 15-30% category who reports having no social friendship at work? Although this doesn’t mean you have no community or friends, it suggests you are spending one-third of your waking hours without a friendly connection.Perhaps your specific job makes it hard to connect with other people. Does your role automatically draw judgement from others? I find it funny that often one of the most relational departments, human resources, can often draw the most judgement. Perhaps it is because this department holds the keys to so many hot button employment related issues like pay, benefits, hiring and firing, and compliance and investigations! Sure, the work can be good, until it isn’t! It is good news when they hire a great person for a team but bad news during a layoff. Good news when they add a terrific benefit but bad news when the cost of the benefits goes up!If you work in human resources, I am sure you’re familiar with some employees’ visceral reaction of, “Uh-oh, here comes HR.” I am sure there are other departments like risk and compliance and sometimes IT that face this same experience and hold a balance between being heroes and then not being very liked at all.Imagine for a moment, a worker from the Bible, Zacchaeus. He was the proverbial tax man during the time of Jesus. Described as a man small in stature, he climbed a tree just to see Jesus. For sure, Zacchaeus was doing his job as chief tax collector, but he was also taking more than he should have and not being very honest. I would guess he was not a very liked guy, and he probably did not have many friends at work. In comes Jesus! He calls Zacchaeus from the tree and asks to have dinner at his house! You can read more in Luke 19:1-10, but Zacchaeus follows Jesus and returns his dishonest gain.If you work in a position that makes others skeptical, remember Jesus sees you. If building relationships at work seems difficult, turn to your first and best relationship with him.
What does it mean to “reflect Christ”? It’s a rather unusual use of words. Has anyone ever said to you, “You reflect your mother”? No, usually we say something like “You look like your mother,” or “You remind me of your mother,” or “That’s exactly what your mother would say.” If I reflect my mother, even though I don’t look like her, people might comment on how very similar my mannerisms, words, or way of life are to her. That, of course, is because she raised me, and it’s only natural that I would take on her ways and attitudes.For example, my mother would always clean the house really well before going away for a few days, so I do the same thing. I just don’t want to come home to a dirty house. But my husband found this strange. Nobody’s going to be here so who cares how it looks? That’s the way he saw it. But I’m like my mother. I watched how she did things, and I followed her in her ways. In that way, I reflect my mother.Obviously, it’s very important who we choose to reflect. Thankfully for me, my mother was the best person in the world for me to emulate. But I know that’s not true of everyone. Maybe you’re having to deal with some ways of doing things you learned from someone, but they’re not positive or helpful. That’s another “kettle of fish,” as we say.I want to talk about how we who call ourselves Christ-followers—people who have claimed the gift of salvation Jesus offers and have placed our faith in him, becoming children of God—should and can reflect Christ particularly on our jobs. Of course, we should reflect Christ in all areas of our lives, but I want to look at it from the perspective of reflecting Christ in the often-godless environments you may encounter on your job.Your job is typically not a place you can take time to open the Bible and share your faith. You’re there to do a job and do it well. But there are so many ways you can reflect Christ as you do your job—things that will perhaps open doors for you to share your faith. You just need to be intentional about it, and that’s what I’m hoping to help you with. Reflect Christ in Your Thought Life and AttitudesEverything begins in your thoughts. The Bible says as we think in our heart, so we are. What you allow yourself to think about and what you refuse to think about is critical to success in any area of your life. Did you know you have the power through Christ to put wrong thoughts and wrong thought patterns out of your head? And if you know that, do you practice it?Your thought life will determine your attitudes. Think about your attitude toward your job. Are these thoughts mostly positive or mostly negative? If you see your job as simply a duty required of you to pay your bills or a necessary drudgery, I suggest this attitude does not reflect Christ. Maybe you really want a job but not the one you have. So, it’s your attitude toward your specific job—the work environment, the people you deal with, the job content itself. Do you face most of your days with a sense of drudgery? With a “It’s time to make the donuts” attitude? If so, believe me it shows, and it is not a reflection of Christ.In writing to the Christians in Colossae, Paul said: Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving (Colossians 3:23-24). If you want to reflect Christ on your job and please the Lord Jesus, make sure you keep your attitude toward your job in good shape. You’re working for the Lord, so work at it with all your heart. Others may never appreciate your good work, but you will receive a blessing—an inheritance—from the Lord as a reward.That means you don’t bad-mouth the company, the boss, your coworkers—never! It doesn’t mean you stick your head in the sand and ignore wrong practices or behavior, but unless you’re doing something to make matters better,
Are toxic coworkers driving you crazy? First, just remember workplaces will be workplaces—people will be people. In most workplaces, you have a lot of different personalities thrown into one cauldron during working hours. Drama, power struggles, office politics, and other unpleasant things are going to happen, at least to some extent. It’s not that you just settle for these types of situations, but you shouldn’t be shocked to discover that in a sin-infected world, we must deal with toxic people.In Philip Yancey’s book, Reaching for the Invisible God, he advises it is easier to act your way into feelings than to feel your way into actions. In other words, do what you know is right to do and let the feelings follow, if they will. If you wait on your feelings to kick in before you do what you know you should do—especially when it comes to dealing with difficult people—you’ll be in wait mode many days, if you’re like me!John wrote:God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him (1 John 4:16b).Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth (1 John 3:18).This kind of love is an action, not a feeling. It is a decision not a desire. Sometimes the feelings are present; sometimes they are not. Either way, if we live in God, we must live in love.One of the greatest indications that we truly “live in God” and are new creations in Christ Jesus is our willingness to extend this God-love to people who would have no claim on our love otherwise. After all, these toxic coworkers can’t expect you to love them, can they? It’s not in your job description and no one can demand it from you.Therefore, when you choose to love in actions and truth, you show a loveless world a sample of what Jesus is like. You become the love of God reaching out to them, unconditional love, which cannot be explained or ignored. It is powerful in its implications and effects on the relationships of our lives.One small verse in 1 Corinthians 13 reminds us love never fails. When nothing else works, try love. When there seems to be no way to improve a relationship, try love. Love never fails.
For many years, I’ve been sharing the privilege and importance you have as a Christian in the marketplace to let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven, as Jesus told us in Matthew 5:16. In all those years, one issue surfaces most frequently—dealing with people. As Charlie Brown said, “I love mankind; it’s people I can’t stand!” I’m examining dealing with people who are particularly toxic, spreading their poison where you work.You must intentionally purpose not to let toxic people occupy any more of your thought life than absolutely necessary. Here’s another practical suggestion: Distance yourself from them as much as possible.You’ve heard a lot about setting boundaries, I’m sure. The Bible teaches us to set boundaries. For example, these two passages from Proverbs:Do not set foot on the path of the wicked or walk in the way of evildoers. Avoid it, do not travel on it; turn from it and go on your way (Proverbs 4:14-15).The highway of the upright avoids evil; those who guard their ways preserve their lives (Proverbs 16:17).And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:7).You must be wise about distancing yourself from people who would fill your mind with evil and try to bring you down emotionally. You may not be able to distance yourself from a toxic person physically, if they are a coworker, but you can learn to distance yourself mentally and emotionally. Pray each day that God will protect your mind and teach you how to literally tune them out when you can. If you can wear headphones where you work use them as a buffer between you and a toxic person. Even if you don’t listen to anything, just wearing headphones creates some distance.You have two options: You can gripe and complain about them, letting them bring you down to their level, or you can determine by God’s grace, to take whatever steps are necessary to respond appropriately and in Christ-like ways to toxic, difficult people. God loves them as much as he loves you, and no one is in your life by accident.
I can remember times when I worked with or for someone who was toxic. I think of one man who was never pleasant, always complaining and demanding, had no encouraging words ever, and truly poisoned the atmosphere in the room when he entered. Do you have a coworker like this?I’m specifically looking at how Jesus would want you and me to respond and interact with the toxic people in our lives. I think the first challenge is to get your own attitude and reactions to toxic people under control. Learn to do some things that will keep you from—as we say—going crazy. Here is the first and most important thing you can do to protect yourself when you’re dealing with a truly toxic person. Don’t let your thoughts and your mind dwell on them all the time.When dealing with such a disruptive and irritating person—on a regular basis, no less—it’s very natural to let their behavior occupy your mind and your thoughts way too much. You dread going to work because you’ll have to deal with them. You fume all the way home because you had to deal with them. They can occupy way too much of your thought life. You need to firmly and swiftly boot the person out of your head. Refuse to let them take over your mind. Philippians 4 tells us to think about things that are lovely, pure, noble—and that pretty much excludes a toxic person. Stop giving them time in your mind.And how do you do that? You do it by replacing thoughts of them with good thoughts, thankfulness, reciting your blessings, and focusing on God’s goodness. That’s what it means to bring every thought into captivity and make it obedient to Christ, as we read in 2 Corinthians 10:5. This spiritual discipline will make a huge difference in your life. If you have not already discovered this truth and learned how to take wrong thoughts captive, I recommend a book I’ve written on it, entitled Think About What You Think About.As you head out to work each day, pray the Holy Spirit will remind you to boot those wrong thoughts out of your mind, to help you refuse to allow toxic people to occupy your thoughts in a negative and upsetting way. That is a very important first step.
Are toxic coworkers driving you crazy? These are people you are forced to be with daily, and their habits or attitudes are driving you—well, crazy!What are some characteristics of toxic people? Basically, they are people who somehow poison the atmosphere around them with their attitudes and behavior. As Christians dealing with toxic people, our first challenge is to remember God loves the person just as much as he loves you. See them through God’s eyes.The second important thing to remember is the person is not in your life by accident. God is allowing it—not approving of their behavior, mind you—but allowing the person in your life for some good reason. It could be to help you grow in grace as you deal with them. It could be for the good influence you could have on them. It could be both. But trust me, God has a good reason(s) for the person being in your life.We are told in Scripture: If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone (Romans 12:18). That’s our assignment for dealing with toxic people. Others may live by more commonly accepted relationship principles, such as, look out for number one! Don’t take any guff! Stand up for your rights! They may not be motivated to live at peace with everyone, but we are called to this Christ-like objective. It is a lofty one; it is often out of step with the world’s wisdom; it is often not appreciated or valued by others. But as disciples of Jesus Christ, it is our guiding principle.Let me assure you when you can respond to toxic people with more patience, more kindness and less anger than others, you are demonstrating the love of Jesus, and it won’t be missed. Your coworkers may not believe in God, they may never go to church, they may even think you are some kind of religious fanatic, but they cannot escape the difference in the way you respond to toxic people, when you allow God’s Spirit to empower you to respond like Jesus would.Keep these two things in mind, namely God loves them as much as he loves you, and no one is in your life by accident. God has a purpose for allowing that person in your life.
How often do you say something like: “It’s driving me crazy”? Or “He’s driving me crazy”? It’s a way of expressing frustration and impatience with something or someone. And usually it is someone—that person who is getting on your very last nerve! I want to talk about dealing with toxic people—especially coworkers—who are “driving you crazy!”
Someone has said relationships are the sandpaper of our lives, and you would probably agree with that—right? When you are dealing with a relationship you wouldn’t necessarily choose—like a coworker—and when that person’s continual behavior is harmful and disruptive, you can feel like you’re losing it—or as we say, you’re going crazy.
This is one area where your light for Jesus should shine, because as a Christ-follower you and I have Holy Spirit power to give us the ability to deal with toxic people appropriately. I want to share some biblical principles to help you deal with your toxic coworkers.
First let’s define a toxic person. Toxic means poisonous, dangerous, harmful, and persistent. A toxic person is one who can poison an atmosphere, and their actions and words are harmful and repetitive. Toxic people don’t just have a once-in-awhile bad day but recurring unhealthy and hurtful behavior. Here are some signs a person is toxic:
- They talk more than they listen.
- They are always right—never admit to being wrong.
- They are drama queens or kings—drama seems to follow them everywhere.
- They often lack tact and general courtesy.
- They often lie to make themselves look good or to get what they want.
- They exhibit controlling behaviors.
- They love to talk about other people—to gossip.
- They are, in general, very negative people.
Here’s the first thing I want to remind you as we talk about dealing with toxic people. They are people God loves just as much as he loves you. I remember long ago when I worked for a boss who was anything but pleasant; I just found it hard to even be around him. But I remember clearly one day when the thought came to me, no doubt from the Holy Spirit, that God loved him just as much as he loves me. I had to sit down and think about it. How could God love someone so unlovable? But it’s true, because God is love. He loves the toxic person in your life just as much as he loves you.
Step one is to ask God to help you see a toxic person the way God sees them.
Presented by Lauren Stibgen
Forming relationships is foundational in every aspect of our lives. From early relationships formed with family and childhood friends, to our experiences in sports, school, and work, we are made for relationships. God is relational. He was never alone. At the beginning of Genesis, we can see the unity God has in the trinity—one God, three persons: The Father, Son and Holy Spirit.
In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. (Father) The earth was without form and void, and darkness was over the surface of the deep. And the Spirit of God was hovering over the face of the waters (Holy Spirit) (Genesis 1:1-2).
While Jesus is not specifically named in Genesis one, in Genesis 1:26, God says, “Let us make man in our image” (Son).
As John 1:1-4 states: In the beginning was the Word (Jesus) and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. Thus implying Jesus.
The essence of the Almighty is one body with three distinct members. I love the simple way one person described the Trinity as “one what” and “three whos”.
We are made in God’s image (Genesis 1:26); we are not made to do life alone. But what are relationships with one Father, Son, and Holy Spirit? The more I look externally at my relationships, the more I desire to see how this one relationship could impact every other relationship I have.
For most of us, there may be a relationship in our live that is not what we hoped it to be. If you can say boldly, no Lauren, everything is terrific with everyone in my life, I would simply love to meet you! This is not my experience, nor is it my experience with many of my close friends and colleagues. Watch the news or read an opinion article. Our relationships are very broken.
Have you ever heard the phrase “born sinner”? This is a theological phrase from the concept of the original sin born by Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden. Yes, the one with the fruit and the snake that leaves Adam and Eve hiding in the bushes naked from God. From this, we have inherited a sinful nature from birth.
My aim is not to paint a depressing picture about a lifetime of doomed connections but rather to stress the importance of our personal relationship with God and his trinitarian nature. Each person of the Trinity—Father, Son, and Holy Spirit—plays an important relational role in our lives. Each is a model for how we can outwardly express ourselves in relationship with others.
The early age relationships we form are called attachment relationships and help children from birth to 6 years old develop a sense of security and trust which can impact their future relationships as they get older. Can you join me in having the mind of a young child? I want you to deeply consider how you can develop a deep attachment relationship with the persons of the Trinity. A secure and trusting relationship can impact every future relationship you have! After all, some of you are God’s child! You have a fresh and new start! In John 3:3, Jesus tells us unless we are born again, we cannot see the kingdom of God. In fact, the Trinity is seen all together in verses in John 3:1-8.
While we worship the triune God, let’s carefully consider the attributes of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit while recognizing one is not greater than another, and they exist in perfect harmony. How do these specific attributes help us relate to others?
God the Father.
The Lord, the Lord, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, maintaining love to thousands, and forgiving wickedness, rebellion and sin. Yet he does not leave the guilty unpunished; he punishes the children and their children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation (Exodus 34:6-7).
In Exodus 34: 6-7, God describes himself to Moses. We know he is God, and we are not. Yet, we can consider his attributes in our own relationships. Are we merciful and gracious to others? Slow to anger? Do we give love abundantly and faithfully? Do we forgive?
God the Father is the creator of all created things. For by him all things were created, in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities—all things were created through him and for him (Colossians 1:16).
As you move through your day are you considering that God truly made everything and even established those in power? How do you relate to God’s creation? Are you approaching creation with care and thanksgiving? Are you remembering God created all people? Every person. Even those you don’t agree with or those who hurt you. He created them.
Have you heard the terms omniscient, omnipresent, and omnipotent? God is all knowing. He is ever present and all powerful. There are over one hundred names for God in the Bible—ways man has tried to explain just how glorious he really is. I could wonder at each attribute and take an entire devotional time with you in awe of God. I encourage you to read about the attributes of God and where they are in the Bible.
We know God is love because, he so loved the world that he sent his one and only son that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life (John 3:16).
God the Son.
Jesus is referred to as our great mediator. He was sent by our loving Father to save us from our sin and give us eternal life.
Jesus is essential to our relationship with God. In John 14:6, Jesus proclaims: I am the way, the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. Jesus is essential to our prayers as we see in John 14:13-14: Whatever you ask in my name, this I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask me anything in my name I will do it.
Jesus is the light of the world. Jesus is peace. As we read the Gospels, we see his relationships with those who were sick physically and mentally, and who were living in sin. He works to redeem the lost and to heal. Jesus holds close personal relationships with the disciples and other friends like, Mary, Martha, and Lazarus. He also holds a close relationship with the Father, retreating to him often and crying out in prayer both in petition for himself in his weariness and for our salvation.
Jesus embodies love in relationships in every way. A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; just as I have loved you, you are also to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another” (John 13:34-35).
How are you looking to Jesus as you consider your relationships today? Are you living out the greatest commandment?
Jesus reminds us, If you love me, keep my commands. And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another advocate to help you and be with you forever— the Spirit of truth. The world cannot accept him, because it neither sees him nor knows him. But you know him, for he lives with you and will be in you (John 14:15-17).
The Holy Spirit.
The proclaimed Helper asked for by Jesus and sent from the Father so we would never be alone—that is the Holy Spirit. The same Spirit that hovered over the waters at creation indwells the believers of Jesus Christ.
The Holy Spirit gives us hope (Romans 15:13). The Holy Spirit gives us wisdom and understanding (Isaiah 11:2). We are promised the Holy Spirit will teach us and remind us of the words Jesus has said (John 14:26).
The Holy Spirit will intercede for us when we don’t know how to pray (Romans 8:26) or what to say (Luke 12:12).
The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God (Romans 8:16). We will be seen differently because of this indwelling of the Holy Spirit.
And the Holy Spirit gives us power to be witnesses (Acts 1:8).
We are never far from God the Father and Jesus the Son because of the Holy Spirit! We are never alone.
Can you start to feel that attachment relationship yet? The one of a young child with a loving parent? Secure and trusting?
What is beautiful about considering the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit individually, is we can see the interdependent, dependent, equally important unity displayed in the One, Triune God. The pure and powerful harmony displayed in the Trinity, paired with the knowledge that we are created in the image of God, points us right back to where we began.
The Trinity displays the communion of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit throughout Scripture. Scripture clearly shows communication between the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Jesus even asks, “on’t you believe that I am in the Father, and that the Father is in me? The words I say to you I do not speak on my own authority. Rather, it is the Father, living in me, who is doing his work. Believe me when I say that I am in the Father and the Father is in me; or at least believe on the evidence of the works themselves (John 14:10-11).
John 13:20: Truly, truly, I say to you, whoever received the one I send receives me, and whoever receives me, receives the one who sent me.”
2 Corinthians 3:18: And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.
We are reliant on Jesus and the Holy Spirit to pray to God in our times of need. We are reliant on the Holy Spirit for our spiritual gifts.
Absent the Trinity, we would not exist and surely would not have the promise of eternity and the power of the Holy Spirit.
We are created for unity—for relationships and for community. This is God’s vision for his church. We are one body with many members. Beautifully different but codependent on the gifts and talents God gave to each of us. Outside of his church, we can still see the need for the world to be redeemed in all of its created diversity just crying out for unity.
Ecclesiastes 3:11: He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also, he has put eternity into man’s heart, yet so he cannot find out what God has done from beginning to end.
People deeply long for this eternal love that can only come from our Savior, Jesus Christ. They are seeking it in ideologies, idols, and worldly constructs that can never satisfy. But those in Christ Jesus are secure and attached. One member of the body of Christ.
How can you wonder in awe of your relationship with One? Find time to meditate on how this relationship can point you toward even deeper connections with the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Become secure and filled with trust like a child.
Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven (Matthew 18:3).
I’ve been examining how we can do a better job of connecting with people.
Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling (1 Peter 4:9).
How do we show hospitality to one another?
There are myriads of ways to do that, but it means you will have to see yourself as the host or hostess rather than the guest. Someone who shows hospitality takes on the responsibility to make others comfortable, to serve their needs, to initiate a welcoming environment, to make the first move. That could be in any situation—at home, at work, at church, while shopping or traveling, etc. Show hospitality to others.
Sometimes it simply means taking time to recognize someone and greet them, calling them by name if possible. Sometimes it means interrupting your own plans to help someone out. It could mean inviting people to your home for a meal or taking time to listen to someone’s problem. It will require a servant attitude, a willingness to put others first and truly connect with them. But that’s the Jesus way, right?
Notice that Peter says we are to show hospitality without grumbling. That tells me showing hospitality is not always easy to do. Putting others first requires an attitude that has to come from God’s power in us, not from our own selves. It’s possible to be hospitable with the wrong spirit—with a grumbling spirit.
If you’re serious about connecting with others and fulfilling this hospitality challenge, you’ll want to pray about it. Pray that God will give you both the desire and the power to want to connect with others, to expend the energy, time and resources that will be required to put others first and die to your own selfish desires.
But here’s the good news: When you learn to do this, you reap wonderful benefits. You discover dying to yourself brings new life, as Jesus promised. When you get yourself out of the way and make it a daily practice to put others first, you move into that abundant life that Jesus came to give us. It’s one of the paradoxes of the Christian life—that if we want to be the greatest, we must be a servant. And by God’s grace and for his glory, that can become a reality in our lives.
Do you approach your relationships as a host or a guest? We can improve our ability to connect with others. And the attitude that helps is to think of yourself as the host or hostess rather than the guest. Or, in more biblical terms, as one who serves rather than one who is served.
Think about your daily interactions with other people—at work, at home, or church, wherever. Are you a host or a guest? For example, do you initiate the phone call that needs to be made, or do you wait for the other person to call? When you’re in a group, do you introduce yourself to someone new or wait for them to introduce themselves first? When someone seems puzzled or confused, do you offer help?
Maybe you’re thinking you can’t be the host or hostess because you’re shy or introverted. I want to encourage you to give it a try. It may take you out of your comfort zone temporarily, but once you take that first step to “host” your relationships, you’ll see it really isn’t that scary, and before long you will be comfortable doing it. It will surprise you to see the positive reactions you receive, and you’ll feel very good about connecting with others in more meaningful ways.
One of the reasons we hesitate to take the role of host or hostess in relationships is because we fear what others will think of us. I find when I am more concerned about how I will appear to others than I am about trying to connect with them, it’s because I am far too self-focused. I have to stop and remind myself it’s not all about me. I can assure you if you reach out to others in an attempt to connect in a better, more loving way, you will rarely make a fool of yourself. And so, what if you do? Does the world stop revolving? Does God stop loving you? We just have to get over our intense self-absorption.
Or maybe you hesitate to connect with others because it just takes too much effort. I know sometimes I just want to people-out—just have a quiet moment to myself. At those times I just simply make myself become interested in whoever it is around me—someone who just may need a listening ear, a kind word, a smile to encourage them or lift their burden True, it does take effort and time, but the fruit of that effort is very rewarding.
I hope you’ll consider your responsibility to be a host or hostess with the people in your life, rather than playing the role of the guest. It makes life so much richer and fulfills our God-given responsibility to do unto others as we would want them to do to us.
Think of yourself as a host or hostess on your job—initiate conversations, volunteer help, keep your antenna up for anyone who needs a word of encouragement. This is how we show Christ’s love in a world that is starving for kindness and compassion.
I’ve heard one of the Boy Scout’s mottos is to “leave it better than you found it.” Imagine how much nicer our worlds would be if we all practiced that regularly—leaving everything better than we found it.
If your goal for every relationship was to leave that person better than you found him or her, how would that improve your relationships? It means you would be thinking about the other person and not about yourself—which is a really good thing. No doubt you would listen more than you talk, you would offer to help where you could, you would offer words of encouragement.
People don’t remember so much what we do or how well we do it, but they do remember how we made them feel. Have you ever thought about how you make other people feel? I’m sure you’ve thought about how other people make you feel. But let’s reverse that and ask ourselves, “How do I make other people feel?”
Some people make us feel insignificant. Others intimidate us. Some people make us feel like failures. They may not intend to give off those vibes, but something in their manner or the way they treat you gives you that impression. Stop and ask yourself: Do I unintentionally do that to others?
I have learned I can send negative messages to others because of my tendency to be very project oriented and very focused on getting a job done. In the process, I can miss opportunities to recognize people along the way and let them know they are important to me. I’ve become very intentional about changing that bad habit and I intentionally try to connect with others, especially strangers or people who look a little left out.
What kind of messages do you send to others? Do they sense you are a caring person; do you exude an attitude of acceptance and warmth? Do you initiate connections—with greetings, asking questions, and starting conversations? It isn’t hard—and it’s very rewarding. Don’t forget—people remember how you make them feel, so do what you can to make them feel cared for and important.
Do you know the name of the person who cleans your office or who delivers your mail? An important connection skill is to consider everyone significant, and to take the time to learn names and call people by name.
Often people in service jobs wear name tags. Waiters, waitresses, cleaning people, doormen—they usually wear name tags. If you see a name tag, call that person by name. And if they don’t have a nametag, take the time to ask, “What is your name?” In a world that is often cold and uncaring, something as simple as calling a person by name can bring warmth and a touch of love into that relationship, brief as it may be.
Not long ago one of the pastors in our church had the idea of offering permanent nametags to every church member and attender. What a difference that has made in helping us to connect with others at the church. People I’ve seen for years I now can connect with by name. We connect with each other much better simply because of those nametags—we can call each other by name.
If you determine to have a mindset that you are the host or hostess, and it is your job to find common ground with others and make them feel at ease, you will discover you talk less about yourself and focus more on others. Paul wrote to the Philippians we should count others more significant than ourselves. How do you do that? You have to be very intentional about it, pray God will give you both the desire and the power to do it, and then decide what you will do to fulfill that command.
If you’re like me, your first reaction when being with someone you don’t know well is just to wait for them to make the first move. Just this past week I made myself make the first move and begin a conversation with a young woman seated at the same table with me. Now I have a new friend. We are connecting in several ways, and all it took was for me to say, “Hi, I’m Mary; what’s your name?” You will be amazed at how easy it is to connect with people once you become the hostess!
I am often asked: What is the main issue people in the workplace are struggling with today? I’ve been broadcasting this program a long time, and I can tell you one issue remains at the top of most everyone’s list, and that is how to deal successfully with people!
It’s people! In some form or another, our relationships—on the job and everywhere else—cause us more frustration, create more conflict, and waste more of our time than anything else. Of course, relationships also can bring great joy and satisfaction, too.
Let’s talk about this relationship challenge of connecting successfully with others. Some people seem to have no difficulty forming friendships, generating loyalty, creating community, and getting along with people, while others seem to be lacking in these skills. But remember God equips us to do what he wants us to do, so if making friends and connecting well with others is important—and it is—then he will help you develop the ability to make the first move and initiate connections. It may push you out of your comfort zone, but that’s a good thing. It stretches you.
One of the first things to connect better with others is to make people feel comfortable in our presence. And we can learn to do that by thinking of ourselves as “hosts” or “hostesses” in any situation. A good host takes the initiative to make others feel comfortable. Most people view themselves as “guests” in life, expecting others to take the initiative and make the first move. But if you will just reverse that tendency and think of yourself as the host or hostess, you will become more proactive in initiating conversations, offering to help others, and discovering that you are beginning to connect with people much more easily.
I challenge you to be the “host” as you go to work; see yourself as the person who will initiate connections, who will have your antenna up to be aware of others around you and be willing to get out of your comfort zone and make the first move. It is such a simple idea, but I can promise you it will make a difference in how you connect with others.
In part one, I challenged you to enlarge the way you pray for yourself, using some biblical prayers as guidelines, and I want to follow up on the power of claiming God’s promises to you in prayer. For example, think about this passage from 2 Peter 1: 3-4:
His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature, having escaped the corruption in the world caused by evil desires.
I want to urge you to start praying this passage into your life, something like this:
God, I know you have given me divine power through your Spirit to live a godly life. I know this comes through my knowledge of Jesus and his Word. I pray that you will help me to pursue this knowledge, and I claim your promise that I can participate in the divine nature of Jesus—I can be more and more like Jesus and less and less corrupted by my evil desires.
What if God answered this prayer? Would it make a difference in you of eternal importance? The obvious answer is yes, of course. And here’s the thing—when you sincerely pray this kind of spiritual prayer for yourself or for others and you consistently claim the promises that are yours in Scripture, you will be more and more transformed into the likeness of Jesus, because you can be assured that God will answer that kind of prayer.
I want to encourage you to pray God’s promises into your life. I remember a song I sang as a kid that said, “Every promise in the book is mine, every chapter, every verse, every line.” It’s a good reminder that God’s Word is full of promises you can and should claim as your own. How often do you do that? Are you missing some blessings because you’re not praying those great and precious promises?
For example, in part one, I talked about the promise in James 1:5—if we ask for wisdom, God gives it to us generously. Have you been praying for wisdom? Remember, God’s wisdom keeps you from making poor choices and bad decisions—and just think what a difference that could make.
In Philippians 4:6-7 we read:
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
This is a promise with a condition. Presenting your requests to God with thanksgiving—that’s the condition. Here’s the promise: the peace of God will guard your heart and mind. You’re promised peace. Have you been peaceful lately or more stressed-out, discouraged, despondent, or unhappy? Maybe that’s because you haven’t presented your requests to God and claimed the peace that transcends all understanding.
Here’s an incredible promise from Isaiah 58:11:
The Lord will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail.
Have you ever prayed this Scripture into your life? When you don’t know what to do, claim this promise that the Lord will guide you. When you’re in a desert-like situation and everything seems dry and lifeless and you lack energy or motivation, claim the promise that the Lord will satisfy you even in a dry place. He will strengthen you—physically and spiritually. He promises to turn hard, dry places into gardens whose waters never fail—to give you hope and joy even in a tough place. It’s a promise there for you, so take advantage of God’s goodness.
There are many more promises for you and biblical prayers you can pray for yourself and others. These are prayers we know are in God’s will, and therefore we can claim the promise from 1 John 5:14: This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us.
I want to help you to establish a more meaningful prayer life, one where you pray for eternally important things. So, on our website, you’ll find a list of many other Bible passages—prayers and promises—you can pray for yourself and others. I invite you to go to christianworkingwoman.org and download those for yourself, put them in your Bible or somewhere convenient, and use them to enlarge your prayer life by praying more biblically.
If you seriously examine the content of your prayer life and take it to the next level, praying about and for eternally important things, you will see wonderful answers that will be turning points in your life and the lives of others.
Now, there’s one other prayer I want to talk about, and that is how you pray for your company or organization, your coworkers, and your management. First, do you pray for them?
Remember, you are there as an ambassador for Christ, so it’s important to pray for the company, people, and environment. I remember when my good friends, Fran and Dick, prayed for the company Dick worked for. It was—and is—a large well-known company, and they could see decisions being made that weren’t good for the company or the people. They recognized there were some people in management who shouldn’t be there. They knew Dick rubbed shoulders every day with people who didn’t know Jesus. So, as a couple they prayed specifically for the company and people.
As a result, they saw how some people in the wrong job were suddenly moved out of their job. They saw changes in policy for the better. And God opened doors of witness while Dick worked there. That’s because Dick saw his job as his place of ministry. If you share this vision about your job, then you certainly want to pray for the people, the management, and the decisions being made there. It certainly is better than gripping and complaining about things!
I remember when I first became aware of the responsibility I had to pray rightly for my company and coworkers. I was working for a difficult manager at the time, and my prayers to that point had been all about God delivering me from this job and this manager and giving me a nice new job I would like. But after a year of this, nothing changed, and I recognized it was the wrong prayer. So, I began asking God to teach me what he wanted me to learn in this difficult job. And I asked God to help me see my boss through his eyes.
It was a turning point in my life, as I overnight had a new attitude toward the job and my boss. I saw how sad his life was because he didn’t know Jesus. I saw beyond his behavior to his need, and that changed the way I prayed for him and the way I related to him. It gave me an opportunity to be a good representative of Jesus to him, and when I did leave, I did so with a good testimony and in victory, not defeat.
Do you see the difference it makes when you pray prayers that matter for eternity, not just for relief from some difficult situation or an easier and more convenient life here on earth? Of course we should pray about everything in our lives, big and small, but it’s important not to be so focused on our own needs and wants that we miss the power of praying for things that matter eternally.
As I close these thoughts on prayer, let me ask if you really believe God answers prayers? We all could recite any number of prayers we’ve prayed that have not been answered. So, why does God answer some and not others? I’m confident we’ve all struggled with this question.
It may be your unanswered prayers are one of God’s greatest blessings for you. I’m sure you can think of prayers you earnestly prayed and wanted, and now you see what a blessing it was God didn’t answer your prayer the way you wanted him to.
Years ago, before I began this ministry, I thought God wanted me to go into church music of some kind because, after all, I had a degree in music, and I had directed my church choir for a few years. So, I prayed earnestly for God to open this door. I put my house on the market to get ready to go back to school for more training. I studied to be ready to pass the entrance exam to a good music school. God didn’t answer this prayer, and I’m so thankful he didn’t. He had a different path, one I love even better than music!
Other reasons God may not answer your prayers are:
- God is waiting for you to be obedient.
- It isn’t the right time.
- You aren’t asking in faith.
- God has something better for you than what you are asking for.
Also, it is during the unanswered prayers of our lives we learn what it means to trust God—or at least it should be that way. My pastor often said, “Only desperate people pray,” and isn’t it often true that when we get to a desperate stage in our lives, we pray more than any other time?
The spiritual growth that comes in the waiting stages of our lives—waiting for God to answer our prayers—is usually greater than any other stage of life. We’re desperate; we pray; we listen; God hears and guides, and we learn he is a trustworthy God, even when our prayers aren’t answered the way we think they should be or in our time frame.
What if all your prayers were answered? Would it make a difference for eternity? Let’s be intentional about praying with an eternal perspective and watching what happens as God answers those prayers.
Presented by Julie Busteed
I used to think there were seasons of waiting on God, but now I think there is always something I am waiting on from him. Maybe it’s waiting for some direction in one area of my work or waiting for something to come to an end or waiting for the next big thing. But aren’t we always waiting to hear from him? And since we are always in this “waiting room” of God’s timing for some kind or another, then what is the purpose? What is the benefit?
Yet the Lord waits to be gracious to you; therefore he will rise up to show you compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice; blessed are all those who wait for him (Isaiah 30:18).
We wait in hope for the Lord; he is our help and our shield. In him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in his holy name. May your unfailing love be with us, Lord, even as we put our hope in you (Psalm 33:20-22).
There’s a blessing in the waiting room. There is hope. It’s not always my favorite place to be, but I’m not as anxious there as I used to be. I’ve grown in my trust of God, that he has what’s best in store for me, even if it seems difficult. I know I can trust him no matter what.
And my goals and focus are ever more on my hope in him. Yes, you and I are living in the now and it’s a fallen world. But if you are a Christ-follower, there is hope of eternal life with God. The more I get to know him, study his Word, read his Word, pray, and meet and talk with other Christ-followers, the more I can rest in his timing. Not that it’s never frustrating or scary, but I know he will never leave me or forsake me.
Do you have confidence in your relationship with him? If not, please, take some time right now to pray and ask for his help to get into his Word. He alone is our hope and salvation. He is trustworthy and loving. He waits to be gracious to you.
If you are struggling with waiting on God and having patience to endure in a situation, then think about this. God’s silence doesn’t mean that he doesn’t care. He hears you and knows you. But maybe he has something better in mind for you. Or maybe the answer is no or not right now. But you are building your faith muscle as you wait and trust in him. I think Oswald Chambers says it beautifully:
Some prayers are followed by silence (from God) because they are wrong, others because they are bigger than one can understand. It will be a wonderful moment for some of us when we stand before God and find that the prayers we clamored for in early days and imagined were never answered, have been answered in the most amazing way, and that God’s silence has been the sign of the answer.[1]
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[1] Chambers, Oswald, Oswald Chambers Daily Thoughts for Disciples, Christian Literature Crusade, 1976, p. 75.
Presented by Julie Busteed
What happens when you are not patient and run ahead of God and take things into your own hands? That’s exactly what happened to King Saul.
You can read the entire account in I Samuel 13:1-15 but let me summarize. Saul is the newly appointed first King over Israel. They’ve had some success at defeating their enemies. I guess King Saul is feeling pretty good about this. Then the Philistines—the enemy—assemble to fight and they have many chariots and soldiers as numerous as the sand on the seashore.
When the Israelites see this, they are quaking with fear. Saul waits seven days for Samuel (the prophet and priest) to arrive to offer the burnt offering. He was following Samuel’s instructions (1 Samuel 10:8). But something happens—we’re not told what—but Samuel doesn’t show up in seven days. He’s late. And Saul seeing that his soldiers are frightened, seeing the strength and number of his enemies, takes things into his own hands and he offers the sacrifice to God (which by the way was against the law—only priests were to do this). And then guess who shows up at this exact moment—Samuel! And he asks Saul what’s going on, and Saul explains:
“When I saw that the men were scattering, and that you did not come at the set time, and that the Philistines were assembling at Mikmash, I thought, ‘Now the Philistines will come down against me at Gilgal, and I have not sought the Lord’s favor.’ So I felt compelled to offer the burnt offering” (1 Samuel 13:11-12).
Oh wow. Did you hear that? Saul’s saying things weren’t going as he thought they should. He was looking at his circumstances around him and becoming fearful and not looking at God. And so, he took things into his own hands—he felt “compelled” to ask for the Lord’s help in this way. And Samuel then tells him that he’s done a foolish thing. That he’s not kept the command that the Lord God gave him and as a result the Kingdom of Israel will be taken away from him, it will not endure.
I do feel for Saul sometimes. It sounds like he convinced himself he was doing the right thing in rushing ahead of God and offering these sacrifices and seeking the Lord’s favor instead of waiting for Samuel. But it was not the right thing. How many times have you been anxious, got tired of waiting for God and took things into your own hands which then resulted in more trouble? Maybe you are so desperate to get out of a job or a project that you’ll do anything.
I know. It’s hard to wait. But it can be even more dangerous to not wait. To make poor decisions and suffer those consequences. You might not have your kingdom taken away from you like Saul, but it could still end in difficulty.
As the Psalmist says, wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord (Psalm 27:14 ESV)!
Presented by Julie BusteedWaiting on the Lord is hard. But he gives us promises that we can hang on to during this time.But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint (Isaiah 40:31 ESV).Years ago, I was in a job that was not my favorite. There were many things that were fine, but the work itself was not really what I wanted to do. I felt like it wasn’t a good fit for me, and it was work that didn’t come naturally to me. For a long time, I complained about this. I would complain in my heart, to God, to my husband and search for ways to move on to something else. But the opportunity didn’t present itself.Finally, I remember crying—literally—to God about this and just pouring my heart out to him. And it’s not that I heard a loud voice, it was a soft gentle reminder that he is sovereign and to trust and wait on him. Instead of trying to change my circumstance, I began to change my thoughts—my mindset about the situation. It’s not that I became content and happy overnight, but I tried to focus on the things that were good. I also gave myself little rewards or encouragements for doing some of the hard things of the work. And by that, I mean taking a quick walk, getting another cup of coffee and so on. And slowly, I wasn’t as miserable! I think I complained less!Changing my attitude made a huge difference. My situation didn’t change right away either. I would still have some valleys of despair, but they became fewer and far between.Then, when an opportunity did arise, I was almost surprised! I was now actually more prepared for this next step having stayed where I was. And I wasn’t leaving my employer on bad terms—not burning any bridges.I know there are many different situations and some more difficult than what I was experiencing. And for your own mental and physical health you may need to take different actions. But I tell you this, for a couple of reasons. First take some time to reflect and think on the situation as objectively as possible. Are there some good and positive things about where you are right now? Then pour your heart out to God. Continue to seek him. Realize he has purpose in the waiting. And that nothing is ever wasted.
Presented by Julie BusteedWhen you’re in God’s waiting room do you ever think that if you just pray more or fast more or do something more that this will get God’s attention? That there is something you need to do. I used to think maybe I’m not in his will, doing something wrong, or not being persistent enough—which is why he’s not hearing or answering my prayer.Are you familiar with the parable of the persistent widow (Luke 18:1-8)[1]? Jesus begins by telling his disciples this parable to show them they should always pray and not give up. And to me that meant relentlessly praying, even begging, and almost trying to bend his will to my prayers. But I don’t think that’s the point! Briefly the parable goes like this:He said: “In a certain town there was a judge who neither feared God nor cared what people thought. And there was a widow in that town who kept coming to him with the plea, ‘Grant me justice against my adversary.’ “For some time he refused. But finally, he said to himself, ‘Even though I don’t fear God or care what people think, yet because this widow keeps bothering me, I will see that she gets justice, so that she won’t eventually come and attack me’” (Luke 18:2-5)!Here is an unjust corrupt judge who doesn’t fear God or care about people. And a widow, who particularly in those days is quite vulnerable. She has no provider or protector. And she’s asking for justice. Repeatedly. But the judge refuses. Finally, she wears him down because she keeps “bothering” him and he gives her justice. And to me this meant I need to wear God down with my prayer requests in order for him to answer. I thought that I needed to continually bug him to get his attention. That somehow the accumulation of my prayers would make a difference.I don’t think this is what Jesus was talking about. That would be equating God to this unjust judge, and he is not at all like that. He cares about us, he cares about justice, it’s his unchangeable character. And I am not like the nameless widow. God knows me, loves me, provides for and protects me. Jesus tells us why he told this parable in verse 1 to show that we should always pray and not give up. And that can be hard to do when you’re in that waiting room.When you and I persist in praying, in talking to God, our hearts become more inclined to his. It’s a life of prayer that we are called to—a life of continual conversation with God. And it’s more about how our hearts and minds can be transformed to his. So yes, pray continually. And trust that in his perfect timing he will answer.As the Psalmist said: I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in his word, I hope (Psalm 130:5 ESV).---[1] Dr. Kent Hughes, “Living in the ‘Not Yet’” Series: Luke, January 8, 2008, https://preachingtheword.com/av_item.php?avid=579
Presented by Julie BusteedWaiting is not my favorite thing! Whether it is waiting in a store line, waiting in traffic, waiting for a doctor’s appointment, or waiting for the coffee maker to finish! The most challenging thing can be to wait on God to answer my prayer or give direction. Or waiting for a difficult situation to resolve, or a hard season of life to ease up.We are called to persevere. To continue to trust God and wait on him.The Lord is good to those who wait for him, to the soul who seeks him (Lamentations 3:25).When I read the account of Noah in Genesis 8—a familiar story to most of us—I am encouraged to trust God in the waiting. Noah obeyed God in building the ark and gathering all the animals. Scholars think the entire time he and his family were on the boat was about a year. After all the rain and flooding, Noah sent out a dove to see if the water had receded from the surface of the ground. But the dove returned and so he waited some more and sent the dove out again.Finally, the dove returns with an olive leaf. Now Noah could see the water was gone but he waited until God told him it was time to get out of the boat—till the ground was completely dry. It probably seemed like he could have left the boat earlier since he couldn’t see any water. But he trusted, obeyed and waited. After being in that boat for a year, I imagine it had to be challenging! But he trusted God. There was purpose in the waiting.Another familiar story about waiting and trusting is raising Lazarus from the dead (John 11). Jesus and his disciples get word that his friend Lazarus is ill. And Jesus’ response is to wait! He says to his disciples,Lazarus has died, and for your sake I am glad that I was not there, so that you may believe. But let us go to him (John 11:14-15).What? How does that make any sense to the disciples!When they finally arrived, Lazarus had been dead and in the tomb for four days. And to everyone’s amazement Jesus calls him to come out of the tomb. Now up to then Jesus had done many miraculous things—many healings, providing food, casting out demons. But here he publicly shows even more of his glory by raising Lazarus from the dead. If they had not waited, but gone to Lazarus right away, then it would have been just another healing. But by waiting—being patient—and even suffering as the sisters of Lazarus, Mary and Martha had done, they are given even a greater view of who Jesus is—his character and his love.Maybe that’s where you are right now. Deep in the middle of a dark time. You don’t have any hope. You look around at your circumstances and it seems bleak and hopeless. But maybe God is using this waiting time to draw you closer to him, so that you can trust him more deeply, and then be shown his glory more greatly.
We all know prayer is our lifeline to God, and we are encouraged to cast all our cares upon God, because he cares for us. We know God is intimately interested in our everyday lives, and he rejoices when we rejoice and mourns when we mourn. Jesus empathizes with all our weaknesses because he walked this earthly road like you, and I do.So, it is normal and wise for us to pray about the circumstances of our lives—to bring all our concerns to God in prayer. As the old hymn says:“Oh, what peace we often forfeit, oh what needless pain we bearAll because we do not carry everything to God in prayer.”But I want us to consider the content of our prayers. If all your prayers were answered, would it make a difference for eternity? That’s the exact question my pastor posed, and I’ve been giving that a lot of thought. Do I pray primarily—not exclusively but primarily—about things that would make a difference for eternity if my prayers were answered?For example, how do you pray for your family and friends? Do you primarily pray for their spiritual condition? Do you pray for the believers to walk worthy of their call? Do you pray that they will use their gifts to glorify God and do the good works he planned for them to do? If they are not yet believers, do you pray mostly that God will do whatever it takes for them to see their need of salvation?That kind of praying is more important than their health, their financial problems, their success, even their happiness. Sure, we all want our family and friends to be happy, but maybe they need some tough times to bring them back to God. If all your prayers for your family and others were answered, would they maybe just have better grades at school, or better jobs, or more money, or nicer homes? Those are all quite nice, and we can pray about them. But more importantly, if all your prayers for your family and friends were answered, would they start to live more wholeheartedly for Jesus?I have a fairly large extended family; if my count is right, there are more than 90 of us counting down from my Mom and Dad, including children, grandchildren, great grandchildren and their mates. Whew, that’s a lot of people. I think of the heritage handed to us by my parents—simple people living lives of integrity and honor to Jesus, a godly heritage as the Bible describes it. And as I pray for all of this crew, my first and most consuming prayer is that they will all walk worthy of the teaching and guidance they have received, that they will pass on to their children the lessons passed on to them, the truth handed to them. More than anything else, I pray for their spiritual welfare. That matters for eternity.I encourage you to examine the content of your prayers for your family. Pray for their physical needs, their success, their health—yes, of course. But make it your habit to pray mostly and primarily for their spiritual condition, for their relationship with God through Jesus Christ.How do you pray for the world—this huge world we live in? In the Bible, God’s people are urged to engage with the world around them and not to withdraw from it. That means we should always pray for things and people outside of our own personal circle.Recently, I intentionally reviewed the content of my prayers, and I realized that I often pray for health issues for people I know; I pray for increased financial support for this ministry; I pray for pastors at my church and ministry there. But it became rather clear that my prayers were often limited to my world. How about you? Review what you’ve prayed for the past few days. Have your prayers primarily revolved around you and people you know?God wants us to pray about the world around us. How do you do that? Well, first you become educated and aware of what’s happening outside your world. A few years ago, along with a coworker in my church, I became aware for the first time of the scourge of sex trafficking in our country and our city.
The question today is: How can you become a God-confident woman or man?First, you must continue to grow in your knowledge of Jesus and the Word by making them a daily priority in your life. There’s no “secret sauce” here. It is back to the basics of saturating your life with the truth that comes only from God’s Word. This is written Word—the Bible—and the Word made flesh, dwelling among us—Jesus Christ.As you continue to know God better, you build spiritual muscles which results in God-confidence. Then, most likely, God will give you an opportunity to do something that will be too big and too hard for you to do. Are you willing to step out of your comfort zone and follow the Lord, even if you are a bit fearful? I find when God calls me to serve in a new way, I’m always in over my head. But he who calls us to a new service gives us what we need. That’s what we call walking by faith not by sight.What are your gifts and abilities you have not yet used in serving the Lord? Find ways to use them. He didn’t gift you just so you could get a good job and earn more money. He wants to you to serve others.Never compare yourself to others. You don’t have to do what someone else does or measure up to someone else’s expectations. But you will need to step out on faith and follow God’s leading.Then you will be confident of this:...that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus (Philippians 1:6).You will be living in God-confidence, and it will be amazing. It will be tiring, yes, and not always easy but always fruitful and satisfying. And the joy of the Lord will be your strength.
What is hindering you from having God-confidence? Being confident in yourself is very risky because pretty soon that self will let you down. But being confident in God—who he is and how he sees you—is a firm foundation that holds up no matter what.What is keeping you from having this God-confidence?Could it be a sin you haven’t confessed and forsaken?Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us (Hebrews 12:1).Do you give up too easily and too quickly?Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him (James 1:12).Is your past imprisoning you?Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus (Philippians 3:13-14).Are you afraid to fail?For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline (2 Timothy 1:7).Has the enemy of your soul succeeded in making you feel unworthy, or keeping you burdened with sins which God forgave? I want to encourage you today to claim your right—your inheritance—as God’s son or daughter. You have God’s Spirit, and His Spirit makes it possible for you to be God-confident. His confidence is powerful, loving, and self-disciplined. Are you “taking advantage” of what is yours through God’s Spirit? Are you aware of the Spirit’s presence and the power you have as a result?
As Christ-followers, the Bible says we should put no confidence in the flesh. It’s pretty undependable. But you can and should be totally God-confident. Confident that you have become a child of God through faith in Jesus Christ and confident that God has good plans for you—good works for you to do which he determined before you were born.There’s nothing to be gained by being constrained and handcuffed by a lack of confidence. James put it this way:But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do (James 1:6 – 8).James says if you’re blown and tossed—like happens with lack of confidence—you are unstable in all your ways. You need confidence to be what God created you to be and do the good works he put you here to do. And the confidence you need is not self-confidence, but rather it is God-confidence.What is hindering you from this God-confident life? Many times, it is the constant thought you simply are not good enough. Thoughts like: you’ve sinned too much; your past is too bad; you can never be worthy. You know where that comes from, don’t you? Satan will tell you lies about yourself, like thinking you’re not good enough. But remember this wonderful truth.Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus (Romans 8:1).Whether condemnation is coming at you from others or yourself, you are believing a lie because God never deals with us through condemnation—making us feel unworthy and without hope. The Holy Spirit who indwells every believer will convict you of sin for the purpose of helping you repent and get rid of the drag on your spiritual life. But God never deals with you through condemnation; that’s what the enemy tries to do.When the enemy is successful at destroying your God-confidence by his sneaky and sinister words of condemnation, he is keeping you from the joy of the Lord, which is your strength, and from the abundant life Jesus died to give you. You’re missing all the good stuff!But there’s hope in Jesus!
The second tool you need to be God-confident is to know how God sees you. God wants you to be confident in how he has gifted you and how he wants to use you.Let’s begin by affirming what God has said about us:For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well (Psalm 139:13-14).I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one will snatch them out of my hand (John 10:28).Have you ever looked at yourself in the mirror and said, “I am fearfully and wonderfully made”? Or “I am safe in the hand of Jesus—no one can snatch me out of his hand”?As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love (John 15:9).Have you ever declared: “I am the one Jesus loves”? God-confidence depends on being totally confident of who you are in Christ. But it doesn’t come in one swoop—it comes through getting to know God better and better.You have been gifted to do something good for the Kingdom.For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them (Ephesians 2:10 NASB).When you’re willing to take the next steps where God is leading you, to do those good works he prepared for you, then you can be confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus (Philippians 1:6). That is God-confidence!
Here’s an interesting question: Do you think God wants you to face your world, your life, with unwavering confidence? Is there anything to be gained by lacking confidence? What message does it send if you and I, as Christ-followers, appear uncertain or doubtful? Does that bring glory to God?On the other hand, does it bring glory to God if you have the kind of self-confidence the world says is necessary? This confidence is proud and self-focused, self-assured and braggadocious? It brings glory to yourself.We certainly need confidence. But putting a lot of it in yourself is risky, because it’s undependable. You can feel confident one day or about one thing, and then the rug gets pulled out from under you the next day and there goes that self-confidence out the door.It’s God-confidence you and I need, not self-confidence. His confidence makes a difference in the way we live and our ability to do what God put us here to do. And it will look different on each of us. However, there are certain things we must be confident of to face life with God-confidence. I want to share some necessary tools for the God-confident woman.The first tool you need is to be totally confident of your faith.Confident in your relationship to God through JesusI know whom I have believed, and am convinced that he is able to guard what I have entrusted to him until that day (2 Timothy 1:12b).Confident in God’s sovereigntyFor you have been my hope, Sovereign Lord, my confidence since my youth (Psalm 71:5).Confident in God’s loveFor I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord (Romans 8:38-39).Confident God will never leave you or forsake youGod has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you” (Hebrews 13:5b).Confident that God answers prayerThis is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us (1 John 5:14).Now, if you are confident of those things, then you have the foundation for God-confidence. That’s where it begins.
Holding on, hanging in there, being patient, sitting in the waiting room—none of those come easy for me. And being put on hold on the telephone is particularly annoying—don’t you agree? So, today more than anything else I’m talking to me, and you can listen in, as I remind myself again that I have to hold on when I’m on hold.When you think of someone in the Bible who was on hold, you most likely think of Job. Talk about holding on when he was on hold, nobody has ever endured more than Job did while waiting for God to move. In Job 6:8, 11-12 he says:Oh, that I might have my request, that God would grant what I hope for. What strength do I have, that I should still hope? What prospects, that I should be patient? Do I have the strength of stone? Is my flesh bronze?And in chapter seven, he goes on to say:My days are swifter than a weaver’s shuttle, and they come to an end without hope. Remember, O God, that my life is but a breath; my eyes will never see happiness again (Job 7:6-7).His words may express your heart today. Like Job, you may be saying or thinking: Why hasn’t God granted my request? I don’t have the strength to keep holding on. After all, I’m just flesh! I’ve lost hope, and I’ll never be happy again.For most of us, this feeling of hopelessness doesn’t show itself outwardly so much as it corrupts us on the inside. It takes the form of what Thoreau called “quiet desperation.” You keep going, saying the right things, and maintaining a semblance of normalcy, but on the inside you’ve truly given up. You’re going through the motions of a marriage or a job; you’re making people think everything’s okay with your children or parents, but in reality, you’re emotionally detached; there’s no more fight left in you, and you’re almost at the place where you really don’t care.I want to share three simple truths that will help you hold on when you’re on hold. And the first one is: Trust in God’s Sovereignty. That simply means you continue to believe that nothing happens in God’s universe outside of God’s influence and authority. And you believe the same is true in your life. God is sovereign in your life. Therefore, you can trust that in his sovereignty, he will make all things work together for your good, even the evil and wrongs of others and the cruelty of this sin-infested world.Believe me, I know it’s not easy to trust when you’re on hold, especially when it looks like your world is crumbling around you. I think of a friend who went through years of pain and suffering from an unfaithful husband and a broken marriage, death of two children, another child who walked away from God, and other significant losses. Honestly, she was a Job-story for today, and I often wondered how she made it through. Obviously, all those things left deep scars and hurt, but she turned it into opportunity for her to minister to others. She completed a biblical counseling degree, and now she has a voice to help others who are “on hold” because she has walked deep, dark roads. In God’s sovereignty and as only God can do, he turned her sorrow into dancing and has given her a broader, more effective ministry as a result.So, if you can put your trust in God’s sovereignty today, regardless of your feelings, and simply repeat that you believe he is still in control, that is step one in holding on while you’re on hold.Step two is to Trust in God’s Timing. Listen to these verses from Psalm 37:5-7:Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn, your vindication like the noonday sun. Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes.God’s timing often seems so inappropriate to us. What possible good can come from waiting any longer? That’s how we see it. I can look back on my life and see how the waiting periods of my life were there for a purpose—a purpo...
Presented by Lauren StibgenDo you view patience as passive? Patience is anything but passive behavior. In fact, patience is powerful. Remembering God’s power, his patience, and the fact that we are made in his image can help us rethink this attribute.In our society, patience often is viewed as quiet, timid, and, as I stated a moment ago, passive. We get this sense of waiting—somewhat of a pause. This waiting, patience, and pause can give us the space we need to advance in ways that remain unseen by others until the moment of action.Through patience a ruler can be persuaded, and a gentle tongue can break a bone (Proverbs 25:15).Think about the art of persuasion. We hear about it in business a lot. Persuasion is defined as the action or fact of persuading someone or of being persuaded to do or believe something through reason or argument.Persuasion isn’t fast. It requires patience. Patience to learn about someone’s objections to what you are trying to get them to believe, patience to prepare for how you want to present your idea or solution, patience to get the other party to even be willing to meet with you, patience to meet on more than one occasion. I could go on with this list.Resisting the urge to impatiently blurt out what you want, why your way is better, why your company should win a bid, or why what you want or need is imperative. It can mean the difference between ultimately winning and losing.Patience listens. Patience walks away and thinks. Patience is not argumentative. In Proverbs 25:15, we read that a soft tongue will break a bone. To me, this feels like well thought out, patient words. Words that are planned in advance and not hasty and harsh. Words that are considerate of the other person’s point of view. Ultimately, this soft approach can break someone who has a long-held point of view.Our aim with using the fruit of the Spirit of patience with persuasion and a soft tongue should be more about sharing the gospel than it is about winning in our work, business, or career. The biggest win for us is to see someone know the saving power of Jesus!
Presented by Lauren StibgenDo you have a colleague who gets on your last nerve? Do situations in the workplace just get to you sometimes? How we display patience at work with others reflects our faith.And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful. Opponents must be gently instructed, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth, and that they will come to their senses and escape from the trap of the devil, who has taken them captive to do his will (2 Timothy 2:24-26).We surely cannot accomplish this with impatience! Think of a simple example of showing patience during a meeting. You wait and wait to make a statement. In fact, you think it is a very important point. Your colleague seems to be droning on and on about a topic with which you wholly disagree. In your impatience, do you end up so annoyed that you quarrel over the relevance of what they are saying, or do you wait patiently for them to speak, carefully listening so that you can perhaps patiently present a counter point? I think we have all been in this scenario. Your patience in a situation like this can help you reflect more respect and help others to listen to you!Are you perhaps charged with training new hires as they start with your company? Maybe these new hires are even new to the workforce. Sometimes they just don’t catch on as quickly as you would like. Are you impatient and quick to judge them as not able to do the job at hand, or do you patiently teach them to do the job well?Ultimately, 2 Timothy 2:24-26 reminds us our opponents—in our case those that we work with—need to be instructed and dealt with gently by us. The instruction to lovingly display our patience in all circumstances, can be a good way to live out what I often call Faith at Work 1.0—showing up differently so that someone asks why.But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect (1 Peter 3:15).Showing up with patience at work when people frustrate you can be just one way you start a conversation about Jesus with them. Don’t waste this opportunity with impatience! I am praying for you to increase your patience at work today!
Presented by Lauren StibgenMany things can happen when we are impatient! Impatience brews increasingly when there is a difference between the pre-conceived or set amount of time we have in mind for something to happen and when it actually occurs. The fact remains we are merely human, and God is God alone. I sometimes wonder if the creation of the measurement of time is something God has used to demonstrate this. If we had no concept of time, we could not grow in learning to be more patient!One of the ways that a lack of patience can often show up is jealousy. We see something we want or are aspiring to happen for someone else, and we become jealous. This can cause us to act impulsively in our own will, often to results we then regret.Sarah, then Sarai, was impatient. Her husband Abram was the promised Father of Israel, yet she failed to conceive and bare a son for him. In her impatience, Sarai enrolled their Egyptian slave, Hagar to know her husband. The result was Hagar’s pregnancy and the birth of Ishmael.Sarai became jealous of Hagar and treated her poorly. God then renewed his covenant with Abram, and called him Abraham and Sarai, Sarah. Sarah gave birth to Isaac, but with continued jealousy from Sarah, Hagar and Ishmael were sent away. You can read more about this in Genesis chapters 15-18.Sometimes our haste to see something come to pass can make us jealous of someone else we see in the circumstance we want. Have you been searching for a new job? Maybe it is taking longer than you expected, so you take a job because you need to work. A friend suddenly lands their dream role, and they weren’t even looking! In your impatience, how do you respond to this friend? Are you loving? Are you jealous? How can you lovingly show up and trust that God will send the perfect job for you, in his timing.Acting out of impatience can cause us to make hasty choices that can lead to jealous feelings.
Presented by Lauren StibgenWe love it when things happen quickly! Wouldn’t it be great if the dream that came to your mind could just—poof—happen tomorrow? I admit, the thought of a good vision suddenly happening muses in my mind. Culturally, this is sometimes referred to as manifesting something. Basically, if you think about it enough and envision it as done, then it will be so. You and I know only God can perform a mighty miracle like this, and more often than not, he prefers to use the long game of endurance to help us build that one fruit of the Spirit we are talking about this month—patience.The more I thought about enduring in patience, I realized it is part of how God created us in his image. About 4,000 years passed from the fall in Genesis to Jesus in the Gospels. During this time, God endured in patience while his people fell in and out of obedience. Our God is a super patient God. As his people, we really need to work on this enduring part!Let’s consider the story of Moses and Mt. Sinai. This is the time he had to go up to meet with God to receive the commandments for the people of Israel. First, he had to cut two giant tablets of stone. While we don’t know how long this took, I can imagine this took patience in the form of endurance. Next, he went up for 40 days in the presence of the Lord. The Lord himself inscribed those stone tablets with the 10 Commandments for his people.During those 40 days, the people of Israel did not endure patiently! In Exodus 32 you can read more about the Israelite’s impatience and their demands on Moses’s brother Aaron to create something for them to worship—the golden calf. They were so impatient in waiting on God, they used their worldly possessions of gold and jewelry to create this golden calf.Moses comes down from Mt Sinai to this sight and drops the tablets—breaking them into pieces. The word of God—his own penmanship—shattered!After the destruction of this man-made idol, Moses again cuts two more tablets and heads back up Mt. Sinai for another 40 days. God must redo the tablets for Moses to take back down to the remaining people of Israel.How often are you trading the endurance God may be calling you to for something you are making for yourself? Are you leaning into what culture tells you to do? Going it alone—creating your own destiny? We are created in God’s image, and God is very patient! He wants us to be patient with him! God’s timing is always perfect!
Presented by Lauren StibgenFor God so loved the world that he gave his only son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life (John 3:16).You have likely heard this verse many times, but what does John 3:16 have to do with patience? When I think about my own salvation, I would say God was patient! In fact, he waited 30 years for me to realize Jesus was my savior! Patience first comes to us from God himself, reflected in the love he has for us at the cross. In our worldview, this seems slow, but not in God’s standard.The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. Instead he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance (2 Peter 3:9).God is just on time—his time. Let’s consider love again, but in the context of the greatest commandment.You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself (Matthew 22:37-39).Now, how is love described? 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 leads with love is patient and kind. Love is patient! Who should we have patience with?First, we need to have patience with God! We will explore this more, but this looks like trusting him when we are in the valleys of life and when we feel like our prayers are going unanswered. It looks like endurance during trials and perseverance when we just want something to happen already!Next, we need to have patience with our neighbors, which is basically everyone! Our neighbors are our bosses, colleagues, and subordinates. They are vendor partners and partners within the communities our businesses are part of. It is even the community you are building on a social platform like LinkedIn or members of a business association related to your profession. You have a lot of neighbors to love! Rather, you have a lot of neighbors with whom to be patient!
Do you know what is probably the most difficult command of God's for me to obey? It's: Stand still and see this great thing the Lord is about to do before your eyes (1 Samuel 12:16). Come on, Lord; why "stand still"? Why not "get busy and do this and that and then you'll see the great thing the Lord is about to do before your eyes"? That would be so much easier for me.As I mentioned, I don't like standing still. I hate standing still. I love movement. I love busyness. I love activity. I love to-do lists. Let's go; let's do; let's make things happen. You can do it. Just keep trying. Keep on keepin' on. Those words are music to my ears, but not "stand still.”Why is it so hard for us to take our hands off and let God run the show? Well, to answer that question for myself, I would say it's hard for me to stand still because I'm a controller. I want to be in charge. That's my personality, and I'm much more comfortable when I'm running things than when I'm having to take orders. Maybe you can relate to that.I'd rather drive than be a passenger; I'd rather give a presentation than listen to one; I'd rather lead than follow. So, I constantly struggle to take control of any situation I'm in. Therefore, that passage from 1 Samuel 12:16—stand still and see this great thing the Lord is about to do before your eyes—is hard for me to do.When you dig a little deeper under the need to control, you discover that you think you can do it better than anybody else, and you don't trust others as much as you do yourself. Ouch! There's a lot of pride and sinfulness tucked in that controlling spirit, isn't there? That's hard to take, but it’s part of the truth we must face—or at least I’ve had to face it about myself.At one point in my life when I was going through a particularly difficult period of "standing still," I would get frustrated and start to take action. And each time I took the controls back in my own hands, I heard the quiet voice of God in my mind saying to me, quite simply, "Can't you trust me?”That's what it takes to stand still—trust. And when you and I are willing to take our hands off, give up the control, and stand still, we are saying to Jesus, "I trust you. You're smarter than me. You can run this show better than I can.” And when we stand still and demonstrate our faith in him, he is pleased.Standing still also is hard for me because I'm not a patient person. I want things to happen now. I hate waiting. My mind tells me, "If you're standing still, nothing is happening.” But God's Word says: Stand still and see this great thing the Lord is about to do before your eyes.I think one reason I am not a patient person is because I hate loose ends. I want to complete the loop and make sure every package has a neat bow on it before moving on. But so often, life is full of loose ends, and we have to stand still and let them be.Paul wrote that patience is one of the fruits of the Spirit, one of the types of evidence that God's Spirit is in control of your life. Well, I can sure tell you that when I am patient, it is not me. It is God's Spirit in me. I’ve learned to pray a lot about being patient, and believe it or not, I am more patient today than I used to be. God is helping me learn how to stand still and let him do it!Here are some little secrets that are helping me learn how to stand still. When you are emotional about any situation, it is not the time to act. Stand still until your emotions have calmed down and you can be certain that you're thinking straight. Just today I dashed off an email to tell someone how to do something more effectively—or so I thought—but thankfully before I hit the send button, God’s Spirit just urged me not to send it. So, for once I didn’t let the emotional reaction of the moment cause me to do something without thought or prayer.Often, we really want to do something when we're upset or angry, because our emotions are at such a high.
I am giving you five biblical principles, which can help you when you’re dealing with difficult people, particularly on your job. Today, our fifth and final principle is:The “Speak Kind Words” PrincipleHere are two verses from Proverbs that tell us how important it is to guard our words carefully and speak words of kindness.Anxiety weighs down the heart, but a kind word cheers it up (Proverbs 12:25).Like apples of gold in settings of silver is a ruling rightly given (Proverbs 25:11).Rightly given words are those which are strategically selected and gently delivered. They fit the situation perfectly. With these words, you can change an ugly environment or situation into something beautiful—like apples of gold in settings of silver.For example, suppose you had to confront a person on your job who is repeatedly late to work. Which of these two approaches would be rightly given words? “I want to point out something that is bothering me. You’ve been late to work a lot, and it just drives me crazy. I want every person here on time every day. You’re paid to be here on time, so I’ll be expecting you to be on time every day from now on. I hope that is clear.” “I’ve noticed you have some difficulty getting to work on time. Perhaps there is some good reason for that; if so, you need to tell me so we can work it out by cutting your lunch time or having you work later each day. Is there some reason that makes it difficult for you to be here on time each day?”The first example would cause a defensive, angry reaction and may or may not solve the problem, while the second approach shows some concern for the individual while at the same time making it clear tardiness cannot be tolerated. Those are rightly given words.Often our choice of words makes all the difference in how responsive the other person will be.
Have you ever worked with someone who was arrogant? A person who tried to tell you what to do and had delusions of grandeur? I’m examining some of the difficult relationships you may encounter on your job. As I've noted, one of the many purposes of difficult relationships is to teach us needed and important lessons. And humility is certainly an important lesson we can learn through an arrogant coworker.The “Humble Yourself” PrincipleJesus says:For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted (Luke 14:11).Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time (1 Peter 5:6).Have you learned to look for opportunities to humble yourself? Now, I’m not talking about false humility, such as running yourself down, refusing to accept a compliment, or walking around with your head hung low. Most every day we will find opportunities to humble ourselves. For example, if you work with a bossy coworker, it is humbling to keep your mouth shut and not say something back to him or her. It is humbling to take his or her suggestion.I began asking God to show me when and how to humble myself. It’s a good prayer and I recommend it to you. I found that not insisting on my rights was a key way to humble myself; not talking about myself or my accomplishments was another. Not needing to have the last word is another good way to humble yourself.But don’t lose sight of the promises given to us when we truly are willing to humble ourselves. We will be exalted. Notice Peter said we will be lifted up in due time. That's probably not as soon as you would like it to be, but it will be in the right time after you have learned the valuable lesson of humbling yourself.If you have a difficult person to deal with today, one who is arrogant or treats you in a condescending way, ask God to show you when you should humble yourself with this person. You’ll be amazed at the blessing it will bring to you when you practice this principle. And humbling yourself is much easier than having to be humbled!
Do you have any enemies? Enemies are people who make your life uncomfortable, difficult. They may cause unnecessary hurt or discord, and they are generally at odds with you in many ways, intentional or unintentional.The "Love Your Enemy" PrincipleHere is a principle from Matthew 5 that gives us direct guidance on dealing with a relationship “enemy.”You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous (Matthew 5:43-45).What a revolutionary teaching this was. Never before had anyone taught such convoluted doctrine. It goes against all our instincts to love our enemies. It demands an attitude foreign to our nature. It requires self-denial, which seems imminently unfair and all but impossible.That's the way it often is with biblical principles. They go against our grain, but if you have some relationship “enemies,” God will empower you to love them if you are willing. Remember, loving doesn’t necessarily mean liking. This kind of love is an action, a set of our will, a decision to act in loving ways, even though our feelings may not be warm and fuzzy.If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty give him water to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head, and the Lord will reward you (Proverbs 25:21-22).In these two passages from Matthew and Proverbs we learn three things about how we are to treat our enemies: We are to love our enemies. We are to pray for our enemies. We are to give our enemies what they need.We aren't promised our enemies will change or appreciate our loving attitude. But when we respond in loving ways toward people who make our lives difficult, we keep ourselves from sinning and we demonstrate the love of Jesus in very real ways.
I am looking at some biblical principles which give us guidance when we have to deal with a difficult relationship—like a coworker who is lazy, uncooperative, negative, to name a few.The "Speak-the-Truth-in-Love" PrincipleEphesians 4:14-15 gives us a very important principle:Then we will no longer be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of people in their deceitful scheming. Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ (Ephesians 4:14-15).According to the Apostle Paul, speaking the truth to people is sometimes a way we can help them grow. Of course, the operative word here is “love.” Have you ever spoken the truth in haste or anger, hatred or vindictiveness, or with malice or in defensiveness?The truth can often be very painful. When we speak it in anything but love, we can open a door that never should be opened and cause a rift in a relationship that may never be healed.Which would describe you best? Would you say you have difficulty speaking the truth in love even when you know you should? If so, is that because you hate confrontations or fear rejection or repercussions? Or perhaps you feel guilty since you know you’re not perfect either. Or would you say you speak the truth too freely and often without compassion or forethought?In practicing this biblical principle of speaking the truth in love, you need to exercise extreme caution. Words are very powerful and need to bathed in prayer. Your motivation must be carefully scrutinized to make certain you are speaking the truth in love for the right reason at the right time.However, remember speaking the truth in love is a biblical principle, and when God puts you in a position to speak that, failing to do so is to rob the person of an opportunity to become more mature.
Relationships are the sandpaper of life. Isn’t it often true the relationship struggles of your life are used by God to refine and teach and help you grow to maturity? I want to examine five biblical principles we need to know when we are experiencing relationship difficulties on our jobs.The Extra-Mile PrincipleWe are called to have an extra-mile attitude in our relationships with others. Matthew 5:38-41 is pretty clear about this.You have heard that it was said, 'Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.' But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. And if someone wants to sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. If someone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles (Matthew 5:38 – 41).What does it mean to have an extra-mile attitude, to turn the other cheek, to give your cloak as well as your shirt? Jesus was trying to teach us: to endure unfair treatment at times, without griping or complaining. to refrain from saying some of the things we would like to say to that difficult coworker. to do some work we don’t have to or want to do. to put in extra time and effort to help a difficult person.Surely that is all a part of this extra mile principle. And it would lead you to endure at times and to do more than perhaps even your employer would require or expect of you. But there is also a balance we must find. I believe Jesus gave us boundaries with this extra mile principle, and he is not teaching us to endure any unacceptable behavior or habits forever and never say anything negative to anyone.Do you go the extra mile with difficult relationships? When we are willing to, it can often open a door for a miracle.
Presented by Lauren StibgenPatience is often framed as an outward expression. We are told to have patience with situations and people, timing and circumstances. How can we reflect patience in very specific ways to help ourselves become even more impactful at work and in life overall? And how will this impact ultimately help us fulfill our true vocation—to shine the light of Christ in this world?Those of us in Christ Jesus are “the salt of the earth, and the light of the world meant for people to see our good works and give glory to our Father in heaven.” This is a paraphrase of Matthew 5:13-15.Working on our saltiness and our light calls us to consider our own behaviors and habits with patience. After all, how can we seek to maintain our salt and light if we are impatient?What is impatience? Defined as the tendency to be impatient; irritability or restlessness, it feels agitated and wrought with anxiety and fear. Impatience feels consuming to me. Something that can keep me up at night thinking about all of the ways I need to solve for a situation or maybe how something has gone terribly wrong. It certainly doesn’t feel at all settled. And it certainly doesn’t feel like seeking the Lord.Our God is all about patience with us. I recently shared that my own salvation happened when I was 30. God worked and worked for 30 years until that moment. He used my story to draw my grandmother to himself when she was 80! Yes 80. She is now 94 and recently shared her musings with me about how our bodies will be transformed in heaven. We both said, “Thank God!” You see, I have every reason to believe in the long game. We need to consider God’s timing on matters and his lavish patience as we decide to hone our own patience for increasing our own salt and light!God waited 4,000 years between the fall of Adam in Genesis to Jesus’ birth in Matthew. We learn in 2 Peter 3:8 that: with the Lord a day is like a thousand years and a thousand years is like a day. When it comes to considering patience, we need to reflect on how finite our human view on time is. It is a clock with seconds, minutes, and hours and a calendar of days. But this is clearly not God’s view on time. This 4,000-year gap between the fall and our Savior did not feel long to God at all.With this view of time in mind, let’s consider our own patience in the form of habits. There are so many books and articles about habit formation. A simple Google search will tell you that building a habit can take anywhere from 18 to 254 days with the average being 66 days. I loved reading the article “How Long Does it Really Take to Form a Habit?” on scientificamerican.com which stated that the 21 days to habit formation is a myth. To me this makes sense considering God’s timing and in his creation of you and me as individuals made in his image. In the eyes of God, our habit formation should be dependent on him. Thinking about anything we want to accomplish should start with developing a healthy patience and reliance on God alone.Another term used for biblical patience is long-suffering. Having a long view of habit formation of any kind will surely give us endurance to not cave into the pressures of the moment, to give into impatience in reaching our desired results! Be encouraged his mercies are new every morning (Lamentations 3:23). Every morning, we are blessed with a new day to start forming good habits——we just need patience and to know God is patient with us!Having God-centered habits can help us maintain patience! And patience is powerful. Patience brings presence and perseverance. It can help you rise!Let’s talk about five habits for maintaining patience.First, wait on the Lord.Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes (Psalm 37:7).When we see others around us perhaps making more progress than we feel we have been making,
Proverbs 31 says the virtuous woman is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. What does it mean to be able to laugh at the days to come? As I was re-reading that beautiful chapter in Proverbs, I thought about that phrase—laughing at the days to come.For me, it means as I look at my personal future, I know regardless of what happens to me, my future destiny is secure. I've got eternal life right now because I've accepted Jesus as my Savior. Regardless of what the days hold, I'm not beset with the fears and worries of those who don't know Jesus as their Savior. I can laugh at the days to come.It means I can face an uncertain financial future and laugh at it. I can't be certain I'll have an income next week or next month or next year. But because my safety net is Jesus Christ, I can laugh at that prospect and say, "Never fear! God has promised to supply all my needs. Laugh at the days to come!"As I look at the trouble in the Middle East and see how tenuous things are in this world, I realize it would only take a small spark to put us on the brink of another awful war. And while that certainly isn't a laughing matter, I can laugh at the fear and the oppression of those thoughts, because my God is sovereign, and nothing is going to happen in this world without his purpose being served.Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the Lord our God (Psalm 20:7).You may be facing many uncertainties, and you just don't know what the future will bring. But if your trust is in God—not in people, not in money, not in possessions or position—then you can laugh at the days ahead.Paul put it another way:Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God (Philippians 4:6).A great way to avoid anxiety and worry is to laugh at the days ahead. Those days are in God's hands, and he is perfectly capable of taking you through whatever they may hold.
We read in James 4 and again in 1 Peter 5 that we are to humble ourselves. I'm examining four things we need to learn, and here's another one: We need to learn humility—how to humble ourselves.How do we do that? In Numbers 12:3 Moses is identified as a very humble man, more humble than anyone else on the face of the earth. What was it that made Moses so humble? After all, he had great power and wealth, and the highest position in his country. He had spiritual privileges—talking with God face-to-face—and he performed incredible miracles. How could he be so humble?Here are some things that contributed to Moses' humility. First, he spent forty years in the desert because of a failure on his part. Humbling ourselves means we have to learn that in our own strength, we are failures. For ten years of my life, I thought I could make things happen, as we say. I had to learn that in myself I can do nothing.Remember Moses had a speech impediment. He stuttered and couldn't give a speech, so Aaron became his spokesperson. That had to be humbling for a great leader. It was a constant reminder to him that his talents and skills were not sufficient. The Apostle Paul had that same experience—a thorn in the flesh, he called it—which God did not remove because he knew Paul would need that thorn to remind him of where his strength came from, to keep him humble.I encourage you to learn to be thankful for the impediments you have, the things missing in your life, which contribute to helping you learn humility. It's extremely important we be truly humble, and, like Moses, we need reminders of our needs so we can humble ourselves.One reason Moses was able to be humble is the highest priority of his life was to know God. Moses knew God better than any other person on earth. He spent lots of time alone with God. When we start to focus our lives on knowing God, humility is an inevitable result. You learn true humility as you learn who you are in comparison to who God is.In Philippians 2, we read Jesus humbled himself to become a servant. Servanthood is one revealing sign of true humility. I remember someone complaining about the fact that when he came to church, no one gave him any attention, and he couldn't form any real strong relationships because people weren't friendly. And I thought to myself: A servant doesn't react that way. A servant doesn't come into a group to see what that group can do for him or her but rather, comes ready to do something for others. We learn to humble ourselves as we learn to serve others.
Do you give up too easily? Do you keep wishing for the easy way out of whatever you are facing? It's likely you, like me, could use a lesson or two in how to persevere. Lots of people make good starts; not too many complete the course.We read in Hebrews 12:1 we should run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Note each of us has a unique race marked out. Your race will be different from mine, but the important thing for both of us is to hang in there and cross the finish line.The night is darkest just before the dawn, and all too often we quit the race when it gets dark and bleak, without realizing the finish line is just around the corner. In James 1, we read:Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything (James 1:4).Without perseverance we won't reach spiritual maturity. That's why we need to learn it.How often do you feel like quitting? I can remember saying to the Lord, "What use is it, Lord? I don't see light at the end of the tunnel, and I'd just like to walk away from the whole thing.” If you have those kinds of thoughts, you might as well talk to God about them. He knows what you're thinking anyway. But God reminded me I'm called to be faithful, to persevere, and I had to learn it all over again.Don't wander away from the path but forge steadily onward. On the right path the limping foot recovers strength and does not collapse (Hebrews 12:13).Therefore, we need to make certain we're on the right path and then stay on it regardless. Even if you're just limping along, don't stop. As we hang in there, our limps are healed, and we're able to cross the finish line.How often do we quit as soon as we develop a limp? We failed, we weren't able to accomplish something we had planned, the resources we were counting on didn't come through, things didn't go as smoothly as we hoped. We got a "hitch in our get-along", and that ended the race for us. But the Bible says keep going on the right path even with your limp.Paul wrote to the Corinthians, now it is required that those who have been given a trust must prove faithful (1 Corinthians 4:2).Proving faithful is perseverance, and we can learn to be faithful and to persevere. I'll take a faithful person any day over one with bigger talents or gifts who isn't willing to hang in and get the job done—to stick with it through thick and thin times.
I'm examining four things we need to learn. And high on that list is our need to learn how to let go.There are times when we simply must let go and turn situations over to God. By letting go, it does not mean we don't care, nor that we wouldn't do whatever we could do to help the situation. It simply means we recognize where our abilities end and where we relinquish situations to God's control.For instance, most parents face this "let go" decision with their children. You raise your children the best you can, you try to teach them biblical principles, you do everything you know to help them. But at some point, you let them go. Perhaps you let them go, and they make their own mistakes. But you know there's no other way for them to learn. You let them go make their own decisions, even if you could make better ones for them. We parents have to learn to let our children go.I answered a letter from a listener who is struggling with letting go of his dream to be married. He really wants a partner and is obsessed with that dream and just can't let go of it. Often, we have to let our dreams go—those cherished things we've been hoping and longing for. They may be very good things, like getting married. But God often wants to know if we love him more than we love our dream. And so we have to let go. Sometimes those dreams are returned to us fulfilled; sometimes they are not. But until we let go, they will possess us and rob us of joy and contentment.We have to learn to let our burdens go. Jesus has told us to turn our heavy burdens over to him and accept his light one in exchange. I think many of us feel guilty when there's a problem in our life if we aren't feeling the burden all the time. But that's not the way God wants us to respond. He wants us to drop our burdens at his feet and just keep letting them go. I can tell you that many times I verbally tell God, "Lord, I'm dropping this right here. I'm letting it go, because it's too heavy for me."What is it that God wants you to let go of today? Let me encourage you to do it. You can trust God. He's able to take care of the situation, but first you have to give it over to him. Un-clinch those fists right now and just keep learning to let go. You'll have to learn and re-learn, but it's an important principle to learn for your daily living.
I am examining four things you and I need to learn—and re-learn and re-learn! For example, how often do we need to learn to be content. Someone once said, "The thing about life is, it's just so daily.” Do you find it that way sometimes: Routine, mundane, repetitive, and seemingly meaningless? Learning to live with the dailyness of life is a key to contentment and joy.At times, we are victims of looking on the other side of our fence and deciding the grass over there sure looks greener than our grass. It just sometimes seems like our lives are painted drab gray and everybody else has bright red or yellow!All our lives are made up in large part of those daily duties, those mundane tasks, those repetitive responsibilities. Nobody escapes them. Regardless of how green the grass looks in someone else's garden, believe me when I tell you their lives are very daily, too.Someone once wrote: "The uncommon life is the product of the day lived in the uncommon way.” That means a person whose life is exciting and full is one who finds meaning and satisfaction in the seemingly insignificant, daily things in our lives.Let me give you a very simple example: I have some china I really love. And it's gives me great pleasure to set my table with it, to hold it, even to wash it. I enjoy my china. I remember once, when my daughter was very young, she found it rather strange to hear me getting excited about this china that I had owned for years.And I said to her, "If you can find pleasure and joy in the little things in your life, your life will be full of pleasure and joy. Otherwise, it's going to be very drab most of the time, with a few high points only now and then."Regardless of how humble and unpretentious your daily life may seem, you can elevate it if you can learn to enjoy and appreciate the "dailyness" of your life—if you can appreciate what you have. As the Apostle Paul tells us in Philippians 4, it is learning the secret of being content in any and every situation. Contentment brings meaning to our daily lives and frees us from the dreariness of looking over our fence at someone else's grass.Have you enrolled in the school of contentment? You can begin today by appreciating the small things, smelling the roses in your life, instead of being focused on what you don't have and looking over your fence all the time.
Life is full of “what ifs”, and often they are negative, right? They are usually full of fear and worrisome imaginations. And when you focus on all those “what ifs,” when you allow your mind to go to those negative possibilities, you become discouraged and frankly, miserable. So, let me ask you: How much time do you spend in the “what ifs” of life? In fear and worry, thinking about what could or might happen?Here’s another “what if”: What if you changed “what if” to “even if”? Even if I lose my job, even if I get a bad health report, even if I’m robbed, even if someone I love dies. If you’re born from above through faith in Jesus Christ, what if you faced your “what ifs” with truth from God’s Word—truth that would set you free from the fear and worry and despair that your “what ifs” have caused?We have promises from God’s Word we should throw in the face of our “what ifs.”Promises like:Isaiah 43:2: When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.Hebrews 13:5: Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”So, when you’re facing a “what if,” stop and talk to yourself. Seriously, you need to talk to yourself—out loud if possible—and remind yourself of God’s promises. Remind yourself of these truths. Bring those “what if” thoughts into captivity and make them obey the Lord.You remember the story of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, three Jewish young men who were forcibly taken from Jerusalem to Babylon to serve in King Nebuchadnezzar’s court (Daniel 3). Shortly after they were forced into the service of this pagan king, they were faced with a direct affront to their faith in Jehovah God, as the king set up a golden image and ordered everyone to worship this pagan image or else be thrown into a fiery furnace.Talk about a “what if”! What if they continued to serve the true God, Jehovah, and refused to bow down and worship that golden idol? They would perish as young men in the prime of their lives. This was a serious what if; there was no question that refusing to obey the king’s order would result in death. So, what was their decision? Here it is from Daniel 3:16-18:Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego replied to him, “King Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to deliver us from it, and he will deliver us from Your Majesty’s hand. But even if he does not, we want you to know, Your Majesty, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up.”They went from “what if” to “even if” and declared their trust in their God to deliver them. Even if they were burned to death in the furnace, they would not bow to any other god.Maybe you’re facing a fiery furnace of your own—something that could destroy you or so it seems. Maybe it’s a financial furnace, or a health furnace, or a relationship furnace. You’re in the “what if” stage as you face the furnace. Can you replace your “what if” with an “even if,” declaring that even if your fears are realized, even if the worst happens, you will trust in God to deliver you, to go through it with you, and to rescue you?Can you say with Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, “Even if he does not, I will trust him”? That is walking by faith and not by sight, and even if your faith seems small or weak, God will be pleased with your “even if,” and you can be sure he will get you through. I pray you will place your trust in the same God who delivered these young men and who will deliver you.Then there’s the story of when God confronted Moses and told him he had a job for him to do—to face Pharaoh and deliver his people from bondage. Moses had a bunch of “what ifs.”
This is a very special day for me personally. I’m recording program number 10,000. Each program is 3 minutes long so that’s 30,000 minutes this Monday to Friday daily has been broadcast on many stations. I am humbled to see how God has allowed us to continue the purpose for which I began this program in 1984—to equip, encourage and empower women in the workplace to see their calling as God’s ambassador wherever their career takes them.Having had a long-time corporate career myself, I understood the need for more resources based on God’s Word to help us navigate the many challenges of living out our faith on our jobs, particularly in secular environments. I remember recording the first programs, and believe me, I was as green as it gets. I had stepped out on faith, believing this kind of program was needed, and trusted God as I walked through each open door.We began on one station in Chicago, and honestly that was the limit of my vision at the time. I never dreamed God would make it possible to reach many other cities and even other countries through radio and now the internet.I am pausing today to say thanks and to celebrate God’s faithfulness. Thanks that God can use anybody, even a woman with few qualifications and virtually no experience. Thanks that so many others have come around me through the years, helping me, teaching me, and encouraging me. Thanks to so many thousands of listeners who have supported this ministry.I would encourage you to take seriously any passion God has laid on your heart and ask God what the next step is. It will be a step of faith, and you probably won’t be really qualified, but when he calls you, he will open the doors and empower you to flourish by his grace.One verse comes to mind: The one who calls you is faithful, and he will do it (1 Thessalonians 5:24).I testify that God is faithful, and what he calls you to do, he will equip you to do—for his glory and your good.
In a lawsuit the first to speak seems right, until someone comes forward and cross-examines. (Proverbs 18:17).I’m looking at a proverb a day to show us the way. This proverb is very good advice for us.What it teaches us is to withhold judgment and opinions until we've heard both sides to any story. We shouldn't be gullible, and we shouldn't jump to conclusions.This is a particularly difficult area for me. I am very impulsive and very much an over reactor. And every time I do that, I regret it. I am by God's grace focusing prayer and attention in my life on learning to wait until I hear both sides of any story, to make sure I've got my facts straight, to remember there may be something here I just don't know yet.I remember coming into the office on a very busy day to find a message that irritated me at once. With only partial information, I thought this other person was doing something way out of line, and I overreacted. I went to the phone and started calling her, to get things straightened out. Thankfully, she was not in, and I didn't get to speak with her at that time.When she returned my call and explained the situation, I realized the message had not been complete, and if I had talked with her earlier, I would have overreacted and probably hurt her feelings. God protected me that time and reminded me how much I need to learn not to overreact.Wise Solomon warned us the first person to present their case can sound very convincing because we haven't heard the other side of the story. We need to listen to people but not be too quick to agree or disagree with them until we've sorted the facts out and know what we're dealing with. This is good advice for managers and employees alike.I want to encourage you to go to the Proverbs daily for guidance. There are 31 chapters, so you can read the one that corresponds to the day of the month. I've been doing that for several years, and many times God has used the Proverbs to give me clear guidance, especially on job-related issues.
I'm looking at a Proverb a day to show us the way, because the book of Proverbs is wonderfully applicable to the situations we face in our everyday lives.[If] you have been trapped by what you said, ensnared by the words of your mouth. So do this... Go and humble yourself... Allow no sleep to your eyes... Free yourself, like a gazelle from the hand of the hunter, like a bird from the snare of the fowler (Proverbs 6:2-5).How many times have you wanted to crawl under a table because you said something you wished you hadn't? Perhaps they were words spoken in anger or haste, or words of gossip, or judgmental words. Unkind, untruthful, harsh, unnecessary words that inflicted harm of some kind.What do you do? You can't unsay them; you can't delete them; you can't erase them. Those words hang there in your memory and the memory of others. What can you do?Solomon says to go and humble yourself to the person your words harmed; go, confess to them, and do it immediately. Apologize and do all you can to free yourself from the damage of those words.I know that's not easy to do, but it's a lot easier than not doing it! Once in a hotel on a business trip, I accused a hotel employee of neglecting to follow my instructions. I was certain I had given those instructions. Nicely, but directly, I said, "I'm sure it's your fault; please correct it.”A few minutes later I came to realize I was the one who was wrong, not him. It was embarrassing; I wanted to run away. But I forced myself to go to the phone, call the young man and apologize to him. Even a simple apology like that wasn't easy, but once I did it, I felt so free. And I could tell it made a big difference to him. He kept saying, "That's so nice of you to call. Thank you.” It wasn't nice of me; it was just the right thing to do.If you've offended someone with words, don't procrastinate. Go right now and apologize. That's good advice from Proverbs.
I’m sharing a Proverb a day, which will show you the way. Listen to this passage from Proverbs 6:Go to the ant, you sluggard; consider its ways and be wise! It has no commander, no overseer or ruler, yet it stores its provision in summer and gathers its food at harvest (Proverbs 6:6-8).In the margin of my Bible by this verse I have written "self-motivated.” The ant is a self-motivated creature. Without anyone standing over all those ants and telling them what to do, they perform their jobs diligently and are prepared for what lies ahead.Self-motivation is a key factor in our business world today. Have you ever worked with someone who was just trying to get by with as little as possible. They don't look beyond their noses to see what else could be done. They take no initiative and are not willing to go any extra miles.A Christian in the workplace should be like the ant: self-motivated, willing to dig in and get the work done without prompting or constant supervision. Does your manager trust you? Can she or he be assured you diligently will do your job whether anyone's watching or not? Certainly, a Christian should produce that kind of reputation.Your witness in the world will only be effective if there is a difference in the way you work. If you have the “it's not my job" attitude, drag your feet and do only what you’re told to do, gripe and complain about doing anything above and beyond your job description, how will your coworkers and management know Christ makes a difference in your life? They won't, and your verbal witness, if there is one, will fall on deaf ears.If you are a Christ-follower, you have a power far beyond yourself to motivate you. You have God's Holy Spirit dwelling within you to give you the strength you need to be self-motivated. And when you are motivated to do what’s right, you will have an outstanding testimony because you do your work right whether anyone's watching or not. You do it to the best of your ability, and you're willing to go the extra mile.Go to the ant and consider its ways. We can learn wisdom and self-motivation from those tiny ants.
There is a book in the Bible full of wisdom for our everyday lives, and that is the book of Proverbs. I’m going to share a proverb a day, which will show you the way! We’ll look at four different proverbs and see the wisdom for us. I encourage you to make Proverbs a daily reading habit. There are 31 chapters, so it's easy to read the chapter that corresponds to the day of the month. I've been doing that for several years and find the practical advice most beneficial in my life.Let's look at Proverbs 22:10. It says, drive out the mocker and out goes strife; quarrels and insults are ended. Another translation reads, drive out the scoffer and contention will go out. Even strife and dishonor will cease.Have you ever worked with a person who was a mocker and a scoffer? That's the person who makes fun of others, who ridicules people and organizations, who is arrogant and causes problems seemingly on purpose. When there's a mocker in the group, the work environment can be miserable and having a unified team is almost impossible.This proverb says by getting rid of a mocker, you get rid of strife. If you are in a management position, it's good to remember there are times when the best thing you can do is to let an employee go. Now, I hope that doesn't sound cruel, but a person who is intent on offending others—and some people are—can have detrimental effects on an organization.Of course, as Christians, we still must care about people regardless of how unlovable they are. And though we can never change people, the Holy Spirit can, so we shouldn't give up praying for them. But that doesn't mean we allow them to ruin the working environment for everyone else. Remember, the workplace is not a rehab center or a counseling office. We want to help people, when possible, but you don’t hire people to reform or change them; you hire them to do a job.Solomon said, in his wisdom, you're better off to drive out the mocker and the scoffer, for by so doing, the strife and dishonor will stop, people will be able to work productively together, and everyone will benefit, including the person who is the troublemaker. Allowing him or her to continue to get by with that inappropriate behavior doesn't help the individual.
Some years ago, someone sent me this story, which illustrates this truth—God won’t let you go. Let me tell you it.On a hot summer day in Florida, a little boy decided to go for a swim in the old swimming hole behind his house. He jumped into the water, not realizing that as he swam toward the middle of the lake, an alligator was swimming toward the shore.His father working in the yard saw what was happening, and in utter fear, he ran toward the water, yelling to his son. The little boy became alarmed and made a U-turn to swim to his father. It was too late. From the dock, the father grabbed his little boy by the arms just as the alligator snatched his legs.That began an incredible tug-of-war between the two. The alligator was much stronger than the father, but the father would not let go. A farmer happened to drive by, heard the screams, raced from his truck, took aim and shot the alligator.Remarkably, after weeks in the hospital, the little boy survived. His legs were extremely scared by the vicious attack of the animal. And on his arms were deep scratches where his father's fingernails dug into his flesh in his effort to hang on to the son he loved.The newspaper reporter who interviewed the boy after the trauma asked if he would show him his scars. The boy lifted his pant legs. And then, with obvious pride, he said, "But look at my arms. I have great scars on my arms, too, because my Dad wouldn't let go."You and I can identify with that little boy. We have scars, too. No, not from an alligator, but the scars of a painful past and present crises we may be facing. Some of those scars are unsightly and have caused deep pain or regret. But some wounds are because God has refused to let go. Amid our struggle, he's been there holding on to us.God just won't let you go, no matter what you're going through. Think of Joseph. Through, no doubt, some childish bragging to his brothers, they decided to get rid of him, and sold him into slavery in Egypt. Joseph had done no great evil; he didn't deserve to be so terribly mistreated, but there he was, a slave and a prisoner in Egypt (Genesis 37-50).But God never let go of Joseph, because Joseph never forsook his faith in Jehovah God. And he was used by God to deliver many people, including his own family, from starvation. I wonder how many times, as he sat in that prison, he just wanted to give up. It looked hopeless, but God didn't let go.We have many wonderful illustrations in the Bible of how God didn't let go, even when his people foolishly waded into dangerous and sinful situations, sometimes out of ignorance, sometimes out of disobedience.Think of Elijah. You remember the story found in 1 Kings 18, where Elijah challenged all the prophets of Baal, with great courage, and their pagan gods could not deliver them. Elijah triumphed over all that evil, proving that Jehovah God was the only true God. It was an incredible victory.But the very next day, brave Elijah became a coward, fearful of one woman, Jezebel, who had threatened to kill him. He ran out of fear for his life. Elijah no doubt would have been diagnosed by doctors today as having a deep depression, even as being deluded, as he ran for his life.But God didn't let go, and with great patience and kindness, he nurtured him back to strength, taught him some wonderful lessons, and brought him out of that deep funk an even better man of God—refined like gold.Are you there? Has your faith failed you? Are you full of fear? Are you in that kind of deep depression where everything looks hopeless? Maybe you feel worthless, and you're sure that life is coming to an end—at least life with any meaning? The world around you is a mess, and that could cause you to be frightened and depressed. But I want to encourage you today to know God won't let go of you. He will patiently guide you back to wholeness, as he did with Elijah.How did Elijah recover? He needed some rest and nourishment.
Presented by Lauren StibgenThere are so many studies about the Proverbs 31 woman and aspirations to be like her. She is a powerful example of a working woman from the Old Testament, and she is an important example of male/female unity between mothers and sons and husbands and wives. Maybe you aren’t a mom or son or wife or husband, but the foundations of unity between men and women are found in this chapter and show us God’s heart for male/female unity in his kingdom.This proverb was taught by a mother to her son, the King Lamuel. I think it is important to note the unity between the mother and son—the importance of this male/female relationship. She’s imparting on him rich wisdom and outlines for him the importance of unity with a woman who fears the Lord.The unity between this man and woman—husband and wife—shows trust, gain, and good. The Proverbs 31 woman is a smart worker. She provides for her home. She invests and burns the proverbial candle at both ends. She gives to the poor and makes sure those working for her are provided for. She even dresses well! This woman is so well known that the man she is in unity with is “known” at the gates.In addition to her work, she shares her wisdom and teaching. Her husband and children praise her!This is a long and exhaustive list. And it is a very good example of many of the Christian working women I know. There are many lessons we can take from this chapter, but let’s consider the unity the Proverbs 31 woman has: unity with the Lord, her husband, her workers, her community, and her children. In all these relationships, unity is part of her success.God wants us to be in unity with our closest male and female relationships. He wants his daughters to teach and his sons to listen to their wisdom. He wants his daughters to fear him and seek trust and unity with others. He wants his daughters to work, serve the poor, and provide for their families. He wants us to be kind and not be idle.God created us in his image. Male and female, he created us. And, just like the unity of the trinity of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, he wants us to live in unity with others.How can you create more unity with the closest men or women in your life?
Presented by Lauren StibgenAre you under the impression that the women in the Bible weren’t working women? Many of the Christian women I encounter haven’t heard this important truth. Women have always worked! In fact, we examined this when we discussed the creation story of Genesis, the prophetesses Miriam and Deborah, and the women who worked in unity with Jesus! God needs us working in unity with men for his glory!Women played an important role in the early church. I think about Mary being the first to see the resurrected Jesus. Scripture could have skipped ahead to meeting the disciples in Galilee, but it doesn’t! God wants us to see how his story includes the men and women he created in his image.The Old Testament prophet Joel states, I will pour out my Spirit on all flesh, and your sons and daughters shall prophesy. This verse can be found in Joel 28 and in summary in Acts 2.The Spirit is for sons and daughters—both to prophesy!One of the first accounts of healing in the book of Acts is of Tabitha (also known as Dorcas) in Acts 9:36-43. We learn she had died, and she was considered a woman full of good works and charity. She was apparently a very good seamstress as the scripture speaks of the tunics and garments she had made. We learn it was men urging them to come to the bedside of Tabitha. She was clearly respected. And she was raised to life by Peter.Lydia is described in Acts 16 as a seller of purple goods and a worshiper of God. Paul came to find a group of women who had come together in prayer. He sought them out—to be in unity with them in prayer. His seeking and the Lord’s opening of Lydia’s heart to hear the good news of Jesus, opened new unity and provision for Paul when Lydia invite him to stay in her home. We also see that Paul returned to Lydia when he was released from prison. Lydia needed unity with Jesus, and Paul needed unity with Lydia for his work! We also learn those in Lydia’s household encouraged Paul.Lydia was a seller. She worked. God used her work and leadership to help grow the early church!God is still doing this today. Are you a creator like Tabitha or a seller like Lydia? Not only does your influence with others serve as an important way for the gospel to be shared, but your financial provision also can help ministries lay groundwork to encourage others to spread the good news and cause an increase in the Church of Jesus Christ! This is why your work and the unity between men and women is important to the Lord. Working together will ultimately create a much greater impact for the glory of the kingdom.
Presented by Lauren StibgenWhen you think of your work, do you think about the most important work God has called us to? That work is to share the good news of the gospel of Jesus Christ, and this work is a shared work for all of us who are brothers and sisters in Christ. Men and women share a critical, unified role in sharing the beautiful gift of mercy and eternity we have in Jesus!Although we see the twelve disciples Jesus calls in the New Testament are all men, we cannot choose to miss all the ways women were used by Jesus for the great work of sharing the good news!Jesus’s first revelation of himself being the Messiah is to the woman at the well. This account in John 4 is significant first because Jesus is alone accepting water from a Samaritan woman. The Samaritans were the outcasts of the time, and this woman was a woman with many husbands. He breaks barriers to bring her into unity in his revelation. The best part is her response. This woman runs all the way back to town, not caring about who she is in this community but who she is in Christ, and begins to share the good news of the living water.We see Jesus with Mary and Martha and their brother Lazarus in the scriptures. Mary and Martha provided hospitality to Jesus and the disciples with meals and a place to teach. We know Jesus deeply loved Lazarus and deeply cared for Mary and Martha, which was matched by their devotion and trust for him.Not only were women part of the ministry of Jesus in his living but also in his death and resurrection.At the crucifixion in Matthew 27:55-56 we learn there were many women there, looking from a distance. These women had followed Jesus from Galilee and ministered to him, among whom were Mary Magdalene, Mary the mother of James and Joseph, and the mother of the sons of Zebedee.Again, this ministering could have been for physical needs like food and shelter or emotional and spiritual support during his ministry. Either way, these women, worked in unity with the men alongside Jesus.The women at the cross displayed great loyalty to the end, and they were also first to learn of the resurrection.After the Sabbath, at dawn on the first day of the week, Mary Magdalene and the other Mary went to look at the tomb (Matthew 28:1).Then Jesus said to them, “Do not be afraid. Go and tell my brothers to go to Galilee; there they will see me” (Matthew 28:10).We may not see a lot about the unity between the 12 disciples and these women, but we see a more important unity—the unity between Jesus Christ and them. How are you in unity with Jesus at work today?
Presented by Lauren StibgenWe hear a lot about the prophets, but what about prophetesses? Women worked alongside men in the Old Testament, even as prophetesses of the Lord. Although the Old Testament text has a lot less to say about these women, we read that they were respected and sought after for their specific wisdom. The history in the Bible would surely not be the same without unity between these women and the men they served with and for.Why don’t we see these stories as powerful movements for the kingdom of God? We have examined the unity God created men and women in and the unity of work he created us for. And we also examined how sin broke this sacred unity. This is the underlying why. Culture and sin both play an unintentional and sometimes intentional role in us not hearing more about these female prophets.You could probably tell me a lot about Moses and Aaron, but what about their sister? Her name was Miriam, and she was also a prophet of the Lord. If I think about this trio more, I wish I could have heard more about their unity and the dynamics of their work together!Miriam is one of the earliest leaders of worship! In Exodus 15:20-21 we see her leading other women in song and dance after they crossed the Red Sea. The timing of the text suggests she may have been the first to lead a victory celebration of the exodus from Egypt! Miriam was noted as one of God’s chosen leaders of the exodus in Micah 6:4.I brought you up out of Egypt and redeemed you from the land of slavery. I sent Moses to lead you, also Aaron and Miriam (Micah 6:4).She was “joined as a whole” in unity with her brothers in this work.Deborah, too, was a powerful prophetess. She is described in Scripture as a judge, military strategist, warrior, and mother in Israel. No, she was not an actual mom, but rather she was a leader of Israel.In Judges, we see Deborah working, first as a judge and then as the one who leads Israel to war.Now Deborah, a prophet, the wife of Lappidoth, was leading Israel at that time. She held court under the Palm of Deborah between Ramah and Bethel in the hill country of Ephraim, and the Israelites went up to her to have their disputes decided (Judges 4:4-5).Men and women sought her counsel. In the next verse we see Deborah sends for and summons Barak.Barak said to her, “If you go with me, I will go; but if you don’t go with me, I won’t go” (Judges 4:8).You can read more about this in Judges chapters 4 and 5, but again we see God using men and women—in unity— to complete work.How do you see examples of Miriam and Deborah and their unity with the men around them in your work today?
Presented by Lauren StibgenI have been in the workplace for longer than I want to admit and one thing I can say is I hear more about the differences between men and women at work than what unifies us. Although I don’t want to overlook the different realities men and women face in the workforce, I also don’t think we talk enough about God’s point of view on men and women when it comes to work. So, let’s examine some of the women in the Bible and the true definition of unity, or the state of being united or joined as a whole, when it comes to men and women at work.In Genesis 1:26-27 we see the beautiful work of unity in creation.Then God said, “Let us make mankind in our image, in our likeness, so that they may rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky, over the livestock and all the wild animals, and over all the creatures that move along the ground.” So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them (Genesis 1:26-27).We first see unity in the trinity before God even created man and woman. Our image and our likeness—not my image and my likeness—our. God embodies the unity of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. This is the image of God, working together to form creation.And, when we read the verse about creating man, he created both male and female in his own image. Not men exalted above women or women above men but creation in his image, in unity.If we don’t look to the beginning, it is easy to look at the ways culture and society have created norms about work. The reality is, these are not God’s norms for men and women. The next verses in Genesis 1:28-29 further frame God’s plans for man and woman.God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky and over every living creature that moves on the ground.” Then God said, “I give you every seed-bearing plant on the face of the whole earth and every tree that has fruit with seed in it. They will be yours for food” (Genesis 1:28-29).God gave man and woman an equal command to work—in unity.So, why do we have so much trouble with unity of men and women at work today? Sin. Your sin and mine. Men sin and women sin. We break unity. But awareness of how it should be—this is the best start. And we can look at how God used men and women together in scripture to accomplish his plans.
The studies and articles aren’t new. In fact, the first workplace gender research started in the 1960s and 1970s. Men and Women in the Corporation by Rosabeth Moss Kanter was considered one of the first academic studies on gender differences in work behavior and opportunity, and this was in 1977. This conversation is as old as me, but I would like to remind you that women at work is not a construct of the early world wars and industrial revolutions as you may have been taught. Women and men working together started with creation in Genesis 1. Men and women were created to work together.In Genesis 1:26-27, we see the beautiful work of unity in creation. Then God said, ‘Let us make man in our image, after our likeness. And let them have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over the livestock and over all the earth and every other creeping thing that creeps on the earth.’ So, God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.When we read the verses about creating man, he created both male and female in his own image. Not men exalted above women or women above men, but creation in his image, in unity.If we don’t look to the beginning, it is easy to look at the ways that culture and society have created norms about work. The reality is these are not God’s norms for men and women. The next verses in Genesis 1: 28-29 further frame God’s plans for man and woman:And God blessed them. And God said to them, ‘Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth and subdue it, and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth.’God gave man and woman an equal command to work in unity.You already know that once sin crept in, this unity was forever broken. Sin impacts this sacred creation in every way, and our cultural norms which have been forming since the 70s continue to impact how men and women work together.What does this sin look like within the context of work? What is causing the continued gender bias issues for women? The answer doesn’t start with work; it really begins outside of the office and is part of the cultural and societal brokenness between men and women that has systematically and year after year found its way into our work.With my aim being unity between men and women as advocates to solve this issue, I wondered, who were the leading male voices for gender equality at work. One name that came up was Tony Porter.Tony is the founder and CEO of A Call to Men. He seeks to teach systemic change for between men and women in society. In an article published on his website, “Is your Organization Unintentionally Reinforcing Gender Bias at Work,” Tony states this, “…the workplace is a microcosm of society—a society where men and boys are collectively socialized to view women as objects, as property and as having less value than men.”[1]This blanket statement is not felt by all women, of course, but as a whole, it sums up that sin and the brokenness of not seeing men and women created equally in the image of God is at the root of the issues still facing women today.Fortunately and unfortunately, the Bible is full of cultural examples of both unity and brokenness between men and women. If we look at the Word of God, we will all struggle to understand some of the terrible injustices women faced including being taken by force into marriage, raped, and being cast out of society. Again, at the moment of the fall, the unity and sacred relationship between men and women fell, and it fell hard.But, for every hard-to-read passage of Scripture about injustices for women, there are beautiful examples of how God used women and work for the glory of his kingdom. Women played an important role in the formation of the early church where they not only served the disciples with hospitality but also provided money for the ministry and teaching ...
Presented by Julie BusteedI’ve been talking about the importance of unity—not just with fellow believers, but also with our coworkers.Today’s workplace looks different than it used to. Some people work remotely, some in the office, and others split their time between both. Each setup has its benefits, but they also come with unique challenges—especially when it comes to staying connected.How do we stay on the same page and remain unified in our purpose and mission when we’re not all in the same physical space?It takes intentional effort. Hopefully, your workplace provides tools like messaging apps or video conferencing to help you communicate regularly. But staying connected may also mean being more proactive—since those informal “water cooler” conversations don’t happen as naturally.Here are a few suggestions for maintaining unity in a diverse working environment: Practice overcommunication. Even in in-person settings, this is often overlooked. Many times, I think I’ve communicated clearly, only to realize later it wasn’t understood as intended. When you have a conversation—whether by phone or video—follow up with an email to summarize key points. And before you hit send on any message, re-read it. What seems clear to you may need a little fine-tuning for someone else to fully grasp. Schedule regular video check-ins. Whether it's with your whole team or one-on-one, set up consistent meetings. These touchpoints help move projects forward, provide space for clarification, and keep relationships strong. If you can occasionally meet in person, even better. Build trust and personal connections. Social connection matters. Not just for morale but for productivity too. When people trust each other and feel valued, they collaborate better and bring fresh, creative ideas to the table.Ultimately, unity comes when everyone understands the goal and the reason behind it. A shared sense of purpose fuels effective teamwork.If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone (Romans 12:18).And let’s not forget: In essentials, unity. In non-essentials, liberty. In all things, charity.
Presented by Julie BusteedI recently read a 2021 Harvard Business Review article about high performing teams. The article reported “disagreements with people whose opinions or ideas differ from our own are common in the workplace. When handled appropriately, disagreements lead to better results—but they are not usually viewed that way.”[1]So true! Different ideas or ways of doing things can lead to better results, but so often the response is defensive or territorial, not willing to listen or change. But if handled in the right way, disagreements can lead to a great outcome. An example is the disagreement between the Apostle Paul and Barnabas and their disagreement on who should accompany them on their second missionary journey.John Mark accompanied Paul and Barnabas on their first journey as a helper (Act 13:5). It was quite the journey of incredible growth for the church but also much persecution.Sometime later, Paul suggested to Barnabas to visit the churches they had planted. Barnabas wanted to bring John Mark with them again on this journey, but Paul disagreed because John Mark had not continued with them in the work on their first journey (Acts 15:38). In fact, it’s written that they had a sharp disagreement, and it was so intense they could not come to an agreement at that time, which resulted in Paul taking Silas with him and Barnabas brought John Mark on a separate missionary journey.But this is not the end of the story. Paul, when he was in Rome, wrote to the Colossians and in Philemon—mentions John Mark sends his greetings along with others. John Mark is with Paul in Rome.And in Second Timothy Paul writes:Get (John) Mark and bring him with you for he is very useful to me for ministry (2 Timothy 4:11).Don’t you love that? It’s estimated 15 plus years have passed since that first journey when John Mark left them. And now, with time, space, maturity, and perspective, there’s evidence of reconciliation and working together for the purpose of proclaiming the gospel.Paul and Barnabas had a different view of how to conduct the second journey. And so that second journey did not continue on as originally planned, but in the end, two teams went out to encourage the churches and preach Christ to the unreached. A disagreement ended with two different ways of moving forward. Unity was evident—both wanted to encourage and spread the good news. The methods were different, but the mission—the goal—was the same.---[1] Harvard Business Review High-Performing Teams Start with a Culture of Shared Values by Greg Satell and Cathy Winschitl, May 11. 2021, https://hbr.org/2021/05/high-performing-teams-start-with-a-culture-of-shared-values
Presented by Julie BusteedThe Psalmist writes: How good and pleasant it is when God’s people live together in unity (Psalm 133:1)! How good and pleasant it is to be in unity with others. But that’s not always how life works—especially at our jobs.Just as unity is important in your relationship with Christ and fellow believers, it’s also important in your workplace. Teams that have a common and shared goal will work together to reach the goal.A Teamraderie article cites unity at work is important because research shows approximately 70% of employees believe poor collaboration is decreasing their productivity.[1]If you’re concerned about productivity and the bottom line, that’s a lot of unproductive time spent because of disunity or poor collaboration.The article goes on to report nearly two-thirds of the respondents (64%) claim poor collaboration is costing them at least three hours per week in productivity, with 20% claiming they are wasting as many as six hours per week.If you are a manager or an owner or project leader, then communicating the goal and purpose clearly is a priority. Taking time and effort to make sure you listen and understand obstacles and concerns is important. Then get that message across to ensure everyone is on the same page with the mission of the project or the company. It takes time and energy to do this, but the resulting benefits should prove to be worth it.An encouraging environment with good collaboration starts with being open to others' concerns, communicating ideas and processes clearly, and showing respect. Even if you're not the manager or in charge, your respectful attitude and willingness to listen can go a long way in building unity within the workplace.How do you handle disagreements though?A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger (Proverbs 15:1).A hot-tempered person stirs up conflict, but the one who is patient calms a quarrel (Proverbs 15:18).Being gentle and patient in response to a disagreement will help navigate the conversation. Ask questions if you are not clear on something. Remain calm and listen to what’s being said as opposed to what your response will be.Give yourself time to respond. It’s okay to say, “I need to think about this,” or “Let me give it some thought, and I’ll get back to you.” This shows you’re taking the other person seriously and considering their perspective. It doesn’t mean you have to agree just to avoid conflict—that’s not helpful either. But it also means not dismissing his or her ideas right away. Remember the Golden Rule: treat others the way you want to be treated.---[1] Teamraderie Editorial Team. (2024, August 9). A Guide to Achieving Unity in the Workplace. Teamraderie. http://teamraderie.com/insights/unity-in-the-workplace/
Presented by Julie BusteedHow can you work together with others but have so many differences? The Apostle Paul gives a great example in 1 Corinthians 12 of how you and I are each created differently but are also united in Christ.Just as a body, though one, has many parts, but all its many parts form one body, so it is with Christ. For we were all baptized by one Spirit so as to form one body—whether Jews or Gentiles, slave or free—and we were all given the one Spirit to drink. Even so the body is not made up of one part but of many (1 Corinthians 12:12-14).This is such a clear image of what the body of Christ is and how the church is to work together. Paul goes on to explain in more detail. For example, the eye doesn’t make up the whole body, and it can’t say to the hand that it doesn’t need it. He says God has put the body together that there should be no division in the body—all parts should have equal concern for one another. If one part suffers, all parts suffer, and if one part is honored, every part rejoices. I know it’s an overused phrase, but we are better together—when we share the same purpose and goal.The early church is a beautiful example of this. Luke records in chapter 2 the unity this body of believers experienced.They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. Everyone was filled with awe at the many wonders and signs performed by the apostles. All the believers were together and had everything in common. They sold property and possessions to give to anyone who had need. Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved (Acts 2:42-47).The unity and love between the early Christians were evident to all. The way they treated one another, prayed for one another, enjoyed meals together, and worshipped God was a witness to others of the gospel of Christ. And because of this, the Lord increased their numbers. More people were drawn to Christ because of the evident love between the believers. What an encouragement to me.How can you and I show this love and unity? I think the same way the early church did. We can care for others, pray with and for others, worship together, and so much more. Even at work we can show this kind of unity, by caring for our coworkers and praying for them.
Presented by Julie BusteedIn a society when there is so much discord and argument and division, unity is a rare thing. As a Christ-follower, why do we need to have unity? Jesus gives us this reason:My prayer is not for them alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me. I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one—I in them and you in me—so that they may be brought to complete unity. Then the world will know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me (John 17:20-23).Being unified in Christ and with the body of Christ is a powerful witness to the world of God’s love. As Christians, our unity in Christ and with other Christians is essential.But being united doesn’t mean we are all the same. We are uniquely created with different gifts and talents. And yet united!I love this saying: In essentials, unity. In non-essentials, liberty. In all things, charity.Christians need to be of the same mind on the core beliefs—things that matter—that are essential. In church we often recite or read the Apostles Creed, which states some core beliefs of faith: God is the creator. Jesus is his only son, conceived by the Holy Spirit, born of the virgin Mary, was crucified, died and buried. On third day, he rose again and sits at the right hand of God, and he will come to judge the world.I’m summarizing here, but you get the idea.For Christians, these are non-negotiable beliefs. It doesn’t have anything to do with the worship music, or how the service should be ordered, or what we should wear to church, or any of those other things. Some of those things are important, but they are more preferences—so there’s liberty—or freedom in the “non-essential” things. We may prefer a certain worship style and find other worship styles unsettling, but if those core beliefs are shared, then there’s freedom to worship.And above all, there’s charity—love! You and I need to make room for other people’s preferences. It doesn’t have to be done exactly our way. God created us uniquely and as a result there are unique ways to worship and serve him.
Crucial conversations are often with people who will continue to be in your life no matter how the conversation turns out, and these conversations may cover a span of time. For example, sometimes we have to approach a family member about an issue, a close friend, or a coworker that we see every day.A friend told me about some crucial conversations she has had with her siblings concerning the care of their aging parents. Despite her many requests for help, they have simply ignored her, and she is left as the principal and really only caregiver for her parents—and at great sacrifice on her part. I questioned her approach, and it surely seems that she has been as clear and assertive as anyone could be. But she cannot force them to do what they are not willing to do. And so, her choices are to leave her parents without the care they need or keep doing what she is doing, which is totally not fair to her.In such cases, the biggest issue you face is bitterness—allowing others to cause you to be bitter. That always backfires on us, doesn’t it? So, don’t let bitterness get a foothold. Hebrews tells us: See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many (Hebrews 12:15).When you allow those bitter roots to grow, you heap more trouble on yourself because bitterness will eat you alive, emotionally, spiritually, and physically. It will affect your well-being.Then, commit these intransient situations to God in prayer and wait for him to answer. I know that’s very hard to do because he never answers on our timetable, but he is a trustworthy God. If you are part of his family through faith in Jesus Christ, he has promised to care for you.Read Psalm 91 and take great comfort in the truth that he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways; they will lift you up in their hands, so that you will not strike your foot against a stone (Psalm 91:11-12). Just take that promise at face value and be aware that God has sent angels to guard you and keep you from disaster. Even though you can’t see them, they are there. You then can rest in the shadow of the Almighty, because God is your refuge and fortress.Now, let’s talk about how to react if you’re on the receiving end of a crucial conversation, perhaps one that has taken you by surprise. First remember that a good thing to do, if possible, is to buy yourself some time. Guard your mouth and your tongue. You may want to lash out and defend yourself, but if the sparks are flying, you might be well advised to simply buy some time.How? Well, just say something like, “I need some time to think about this; can we come back to it tomorrow?” Or, “I appreciate you bringing this to my attention. Can you please give me a day to think about it?” I remember when, in a non-threatening situation, a woman I spoke to asked for time. I asked her a crucial question having to do with money, and she simply said, “I haven’t thought about that. Would you mind if I get back to you in a day or two?” I didn’t mind at all, and I appreciated her desire to answer the question from a more informed position.Defending ourselves is the most natural course of action for us as human beings. And once we’re in defensive mode, it blocks our ability to take in new information or see two sides to an issue. Even though it’s a very normal reaction when some criticism is coming our way in an unexpected crucial conversation, it is the enemy of finding any kind of solution to the problem at hand.So, how do we avoid being defensive? I find that my personality is pretty defensive—in other words, I get to defensive mode quicker than most people do! Not good, so it becomes a matter of prayer for me. You may not be aware of the crucial conversation that is coming your way, but you can be aware of your tendency to be defensive—and that means you can pray about it in advance. Ask God to help you overcome this bad habit.
What parent hasn’t said to a small child, “Now, play well with your friends.” We try to motivate them to play with consideration, not to be selfish, to share their toys—to “play nice” as we say. Don’t you think we need to “work nice” with our fellow workers?Here’s one last suggestion for creating more unity where you work: Help others to find their greatness and to develop and use their talents and skills. This applies not only to those in management, but all of us can look for ways to help others grow in their job and become better at what they do.If you are particularly skilled in an area a new coworker struggles in, you could offer to coach her in it. Not only would that benefit her, but the growth of individual employees benefits the whole. Organizations would be immeasurably better if we all simply helped others find their greatness and realize their potential.I think we would be shocked if we knew how much time, productivity, and success are lost simply because we don’t share with each other. I remember reading an article about the terrible Columbia Space Shuttle disaster in 2003. At the center of it was a lack of proper communication and an unwillingness to share knowledge and research, causing technical problems and ultimately the disaster itself. Knowing this makes the tragedy so much worse, doesn’t it?Jesus gave us the greatest example of equipping others to succeed. He began with twelve unqualified men, taught them, role-modeled for them, and then after his resurrection, he sent the Holy Spirit to indwell them and empower them so they could be all he intended them to be. He equipped them—and he still equips us today. If you’re born from above, you have the Holy Spirit indwelling you, and he gives you the power to work well with others, to love others, to be a true friend and a peacemaker even on your job.
How often do you complete a goal or project with no help from others? My guess is we rarely reach our goals on our own. We receive help and cooperation, ideas and support from others, and that makes it possible for us to succeed.I’m examining how to strive for more unity in the workplace, and one of the basic things to remember is to share credit for accomplishments and ideas.Have you ever seen someone who won a very coveted award or accomplished something truly outstanding, and as they were recognized, the first thing they said was, “I could never have done this without. . .” and then they named others who helped. Actually, there are so many small moments in our days when we can share the credit and acknowledge the contribution that someone else has made.Do you ever thank your boss for helping you? Have you taken time to send an email to a coworker who went out of his or her way to give you some advice or share some ideas with you? I think we often just overlook these little things; we get too busy, or we simply don’t realize how powerful “thank you” is.One of the things we try to do well here at The Christian Working Woman is to say “thanks.” So many people have partnered with us throughout the 40+ years of this ministry, and I am very aware we could never have made it without them—without you!A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver (Proverbs 25:11).An aptly spoken word is “thanks”, and it is beautiful. Believe me when I tell you—thank you is powerful, and you can’t overdo it. Are you intentional about recognizing and thanking those you work with and for? It will go a long way toward creating more unity. Give it a try.
Would you like to have a better atmosphere where you work—one with more unity? I’m examining what you can do—as one person—to improve the atmosphere at your job. And that mainly means what you can do to work well with others.We hear lots of comments about how difficult workplaces are these days. With the scarcity of jobs and many companies asking more work from less employees, it can feel like you are trapped in a job you don’t like, and you have no hope of escaping. But I want to challenge you to try to improve the place you’re in. As a Christian, a true follower of Jesus Christ, your first priority is to represent Christ well where you work, regardless of the circumstances.I’ve made two suggestions that may help. Here’s number three: Never ambush your coworkers or boss. For example, if you bring up a problem in a departmental meeting and it’s the first time your boss or the people involved have heard about it, then you may have blindsided them. They may interpret that to mean you’re trying to make them look bad. Always discuss issues first with the people directly involved.Not only will that prevent you from appearing to ambush them, but you’ll likely learn a different perspective of the situation.In a lawsuit the first to speak seems right, until someone comes forward and cross-examines (Proverbs 18:17).We’ve all witnessed times when someone forcefully presented their case, expressed their opinion, pointed their fingers, and then when the facts were fully revealed, they were made to look foolish.To have unity where you work, there needs to be trust. Trust is built over time, and the little things you do—or don’t do—daily will create a firm belief in the minds of your coworkers as to whether they can trust you. Are there not some people on your job you simply don’t trust? This should never be the perception our coworkers have of you as a disciple of Jesus Christ.It was said of Daniel that his coworkers could find no corruption in him, because he was trustworthy and neither corrupt nor negligent (Daniel 6:4). A distinguishing mark of a Christian in a secular workplace should be we never ambush others, and we are very trustworthy.
What can you do to create more unity in your workplace—and make it a nicer place to work? I’m examining working well at work—doing what you can to create a better work environment. I already examined the importance of not playing the blame game. Here’s suggestion number two.Always bring a solution when you present a problem. Anybody can complain and find fault, and there’s plenty of that going on in most work environments. But the person who brings a solution to a problem is very valuable. Before you go into gripe mode, ask yourself, if I were in charge, what would I do to resolve this situation?Early in my sales career at IBM, I remember my manager telling me, “We don’t have problems at IBM, Mary, we have opportunities.” Now, that may sound very simplistic, but if everyone approached a problem as an opportunity, it would eliminate most of the negative chatter and complaining that is prevalent in many workplaces.What would you identify as the number one problem where you work—the one thing you would really love to change? Maybe fixing it would increase efficiency or productivity or eliminate headaches or frustration. Identify that one thing and then come up with a solution.If you can’t come up with a solution, then you have no right to complain about it. Maybe you’re thinking no one would take your suggestion, but have you tried? Have you presented your idea in a constructive way? Many people predict failure before they even try, and of course, those become self-fulfilling prophecies.The wise in heart are called discerning, and pleasant words promote instruction (Proverbs 16:21).When you present your solution to a problem, be very discerning about how you say it and make your words pleasant. Please also be aware sometimes a problem is far more involved than you know, and there may be extenuating circumstances of which you have no knowledge.
A study showed if you have a good friend at work, you are much more likely to be satisfied with your job. How would you describe your work relationships? Do you just tolerate your coworkers, or would you count at least some of them as good friends? Your answer to those questions could have a lot to do with how you feel about your job.I want to talk about what you can do to work well with others, to make those working relationships more pleasant and to have more unity where you work. The workplace can bring out the worst in people, but as ambassadors for Jesus Christ, the workplace is our opportunity to shine as lights in a dark place and change the atmosphere by learning how to work well with others. One person can make a difference, so why shouldn’t that one person be you?Here is my number one suggestion for working well with others: Don’t play the blame game. Shifting the blame for any situation is a big no-no. I’m not suggesting you take blame for something that was not your responsibility, but don’t alienate coworkers by pointing fingers, especially in a meeting or where multiple people are present.Often problems must be addressed and those responsible must be identified and corrected. But the way you go about this will make all the difference in helping correct a problem or making it worse. You should always confront privately, one-on-one, after you have had time to think it through, form your words, control your anger, and make sure you’re speaking truth in love—meaning you’re doing this for the good of the other person not to vent your frustration. You could win a person over this way.Remember, pick your fights. There are some hills that simply aren’t worth dying on, so be willing to let some things go.
I thought it important to talk about times of crucial conversations, because quite honestly, they can be helpful in unifying people on the job. But if not handled correctly, they can cause division. As Christ-followers we should always speak the truth in love, and that just means you hold these crucial conversations for the purpose of helping another person understand, keeping their welfare in mind. You speak the truth with the right motivation.Every crucial conversation needs to be surrounded by prayer. If you know in advance that such a conversation will occur, obviously you have time to pray specifically about it. If not, that’s when you send up emergency prayers for that conversation.If you will pray in advance, asking for wisdom, making certain your motivation is one of helping not blaming or condemning, asking God to help you see this person as he does, it will make a huge difference in how you handle the conversation.Here’s an example of a crucial conversation on your job: Imagine you are a manager, and you have an employee who is not being truthful with you. Records are lost, money is missing, reports are doctored—and now you must have a crucial conversation with this employee about these issues. The stakes are high—the employee could be fired—and you are already feeling the emotions of such a conversation in advance. How do you handle this crucial conversation?Consider first that it is best not to cause the other person to become defensive or shut down and refuse to share if you can avoid it. Even if you have proof that they are guilty, a finger-pointing approach doesn’t work. In our hypothetical case, you might begin by saying, “If the information I have is correct, it seems that your reports are not factually accurate, and it appears that the use of funds has not been according to company policy. Can you shed any light on these?”Think of what you really want to achieve through this crucial conversation. Do you want the relationship to survive? Do you want this person to learn from these mistakes and move forward? If your goal is not only to confront wrongdoing but to correct it and move forward, then think of how you need to approach this person to achieve those results.In a conversation about a church situation where a staff person had to be confronted about wrong behavior, the question was asked, “Did you try to restore that person?” In this case, the position had to be relinquished because of the nature of the offense, but was anyone trying to help restore this person spiritually? Unfortunately, the answer was no. The goal was to ask for his resignation, with little or no thought given to restoration. This conversation might have had a better outcome if the goal of the conversation had been more than just requesting a resignation but also trying to restore that person to a right relationship with God.Galatians 6:1 reminds us: Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently. But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted. That’s a good guideline for determining our purpose for a crucial conversation.Now, let’s talk about how we deal with strong emotions in a crucial conversation. If you’re like me, you probably have difficulty controlling your emotions when you’re in these situations. Crucial conversations are almost always high-charged emotional conversations. They are about issues that are sensitive; they often bring to light some wrong behavior or mistake that is not easy to talk about. And that can cause all kinds of emotional responses.In this hypothetical situation of an employee who has proven to be dishonest in several areas, it’s like catching your kid with his hand in the cookie jar—the proof is irrefutable, but they still try to avoid the consequences. So, how can this crucial conversation move forward to an effective conclusion when you or the other person is angry, scared, or hurt?
If you had a person who caused you lots of grief, would you pass up an opportunity to get back at that person? Our friend, Fran, could have gotten her boss in trouble, but because Jesus was beside her, giving her love and pity for Marilyn, she has chosen to back off and let Marilyn off the hook.Marilyn can't cover up her obvious relief as she realizes Fran won't insist on her right to escalate this issue. Marilyn realizes Fran has saved her a lot of potential trouble."Okay," Marilyn says, "I'll get off a memo to you confirming what we've agreed to. And this will all be between us. If you can improve your rating, then no one has to know about the whole thing—right?""Sure, Marilyn," Fran replies, and she gets up to leave. Marilyn closes the door behind her, and Fran has a strong feeling Marilyn may have ended up in tears."Jesus, if I'd been on my own, I would have kept pushing her and insisted on talking with Ed. But now I see that by backing off, I've shown Marilyn mercy—the way you always show mercy to me—and her whole attitude changed toward me—right in front of my eyes.""Well, Fran," Jesus replies, "that's why I guided you to back off. You had every right to escalate this matter to a higher level, and Marilyn's lie would have been exposed. But you chose to show mercy to Marilyn. You were able to see her through my eyes, and so instead of getting angry and demanding your rights, you gave them up. Marilyn just read I Corinthians 13.""She did?" Fran replies. "I didn't see a Bible on her desk? I don't think she's ever read the Bible, Lord.""No, not in the Bible, she read it in you, Fran. You are the Living Edition of God's Word. Now, you can wait and see what will happen because you chose to be merciful.” Jesus says the words Fran longs to hear: "Well done, good and faithful servant."Tears come to Fran's eyes. Just to know the Lord is pleased with her is all she needs to know. "You know, Lord," Fran says, "even if I'd been fired on the spot, I could make it just hearing you say those words to me. I guess I don't really need Marilyn's good appraisal; all I need is yours.""If you'll keep that clearly focused in your mind, Fran, you'll always do the right thing," Jesus says.Fran has had another incredible lesson from Jesus on how to deal with difficult situations. And in the process, she's been a witness to a woman who desperately needs to know Jesus. Who knows what will come from all this.
Fran has been given a very bad appraisal and put "on notice" by her manager, Marilyn, because Fran refused to submit dishonest numbers to a prospect, as Marilyn told her to do.With Jesus to guide her, Fran has calmly asked to exercise her right to talk with the VP of Human Resources, Ed, and voice her disagreement with the very bad appraisal she received. It has become clear to Fran, by the way Marilyn is reacting, that she doesn't want her to talk to Ed, and she is certain Marilyn has been lying to her.Marilyn stares at Fran with a look of fear and hatred, and she says to Fran, "If you think you can get me in trouble, you're wrong, Fran. My job is secure; they'll believe what I tell them, not what you write on that form or say to Ed."For the first time, Fran sees Marilyn is an insecure, desperate woman. The facade of being in charge and having it all together has fallen off like a coat. Seeing this, Fran can feel nothing but pity for Marilyn. "Lord," she says to Jesus, "look at her. She's pitiful.""Yes, Fran, you're looking through my eyes now and you see Marilyn to be what she is: A very insecure and frightened woman,” Jesus says to Fran.And now Fran knows what she should do. She turns to Marilyn, and says, "You know, Marilyn, maybe it's not really necessary for me to talk to Ed at this time. If you'll just tell me exactly what I have to do to improve my performance, and put that in writing for me, I'll do everything I can honestly do to improve. I believe another appraisal will be due in three months, and hopefully by then you will be able to change it. That could solve the whole issue, couldn't it?"Fran turns to Jesus with a funny look. "I didn't intend to say that, Lord. Where did that come from?"Jesus smiles at her. "From me. You prayed that your words would be pleasing to me, so I put them in your mind. That's an answer to prayer, Fran."Fran is amazed, and she looks at Marilyn, who has quietly sat down and seems much calmer, almost sheepish. "Fran," she says, "I, uh, I'm sure, uh... Well, yeah, I think that's a possibility. You could possibly pull your appraisal up in three months. Do you still want to talk to Ed?" Marilyn asks."No," Fran replies, "as long as I have in writing exactly what I'm supposed to do, I'm willing to give it a three-month trial before talking to Ed."Fran could have caused Marilyn a lot of trouble; instead, she chooses to show mercy. And all because Jesus was there with her, guiding her every word.
Fran, our workplace woman has just received a very unfair and vindictive appraisal from her manager. This means Fran will be officially "on notice," and could lose her job in three months. She went into panic mode, but with Jesus right beside her, she hears him tell her exactly what to say.Fran turns to Marilyn, her boss, "Well, Marilyn, I think the procedures give me the right to voice my objection to this appraisal. I'd like to express my feelings."Marilyn's face gets redder, and she stands over Fran intimidatingly. "You can do whatever you like, but it won't get you anywhere. I've reviewed all this with Ed, Vice President of Human Resources, and he's in total agreement with what I've done. Insubordination is an offense for which any employee can be fired. You'll find it in the personnel handbook, if you don't believe me.""Oh, I believe you, Marilyn," Fran replies, "but I don't feel I've been insubordinate, and I'd like to follow the procedures for expressing how I feel.” Fran is amazed at the calmness in her voice, and the peaceful feeling she has. She's also amazed at Marilyn's lack of control; she's never seen her so angry and hateful.Jesus whispers in Fran's ear, "Please remember that Marilyn is angry because you did the right thing. You were a light shining in her darkness, and she didn't like it. Don't take it personally; I'm going to get you through this, Fran, I promise."Just hearing his voice assures Fran, and the peace that passes understanding sweeps over her. But somehow, the more peaceful she feels, the more upset and out of control Marilyn seems to be.After pacing in front of Fran, Marilyn turns and says, "There's a place on page 3 of the appraisal for your comments, if you insist on getting yourself in further trouble. After you write them, return the appraisal to me. I'll take it to Ed.""Marilyn," Fran says, "I can request an interview with Ed, isn't that right?"When Fran sees how angry this makes Marilyn, she says to Jesus, "Oops, I think I said the wrong thing. Guess I shouldn't have brought that up, huh Lord?""No," Jesus responds, "it's okay, Fran. Marilyn is uncomfortable because she's been lying to you, and she knows you could get her in a bunch of trouble if you go talk to Ed.""Lying to me? Why, of course," Fran replies. Suddenly it's all so clear to Fran. Marilyn is bluffing about Ed, trying to frighten Fran. She never dreamed Fran would think of talking to Ed. And now Fran has the advantage over Marilyn. All she has to do is insist on her right to talk to Ed, and Marilyn will be in trouble. What will Fran do now?
Our friend, Fran, a workplace woman, was headed into her boss's office for her annual appraisal. But thankfully, she's not going there alone; she is aware Jesus is right beside her."Come on in, Fran," Marilyn says in a rather rigid voice, as she closes the door behind her. "I've already completed your appraisal, and what I'd like you to do is look it over and then we'll discuss it.” She hands Fran the appraisal form.Fran's eyes begin to focus on the appraisal form and slowly she realizes she has been given a very poor appraisal. Marilyn has given her the grade of "Does not meet the requirements of the job," which means Fran will be put on notice. By being put on notice, she is given three months to improve and if not, she will be fired. She gulps hard and silently prays."Lord, do you see this? Can you believe it? There's no way she can justify this poor rating. It means I get no raise, and I may get fired. Lord!""Yes, Fran, I see it. The important thing now is to stay calm. Remember, you prayed about your words, so be very careful what you say. Measure your words carefully," Jesus assures her.With her heart beating like crazy, Fran looks up at Marilyn. "I guess you can see that this appraisal is very shocking to me. I really don't understand how you can honestly appraise my work as not meeting the requirements. Here are my sales figures; as you know, I'm second in the whole office in volume and first in customer retention. I just don't understand," Fran says to Marilyn, as she hands her the sales figures."Listen, Fran, numbers don't tell the whole story. You demonstrated a total unwillingness to obey orders, you were insubordinate, and as a result we lost the D3 University business. I could fire you for that, Fran, but I'm giving you a break. You have three months to shape up and decide if you're a team player or not. Otherwise, you'll be looking for another job."Fran can't believe her ears. "Jesus," she says, "are you going to let her get by with this? You know how unfair this is; after all, I was doing what you told me, I was doing the right thing, and now I'm about to lose my job. Jesus, where are you?""I'm right here, Fran; I haven't moved an inch," he says comfortingly to her. "Have I ever failed you?" he asks Fran. "Have I ever left you or forsaken you?""No," Fran replies, "but this is different. I'm really in trouble. What do I do?""I thought you'd never ask," says Jesus, and he begins to put into her mind what to say to Marilyn.
I continue the story of our friend, Fran and Jesus on the Job. A few months ago, Fran was faced with an ethical decision. She actually refused to make a presentation to a client using deceptive methods—even though her manager asked her to do it—and as a result the account was taken away from her. She made the right choice, though it wasn't easy.Today, as Fran arrives at work, she's a little nervous because it's the day for her appraisal with her manager, Marilyn. She says to Jesus: "I'll be glad when this is over. I hate appraisals. But I hope it goes well because the better the appraisal, the more raise I get, and I could use a nice raise."Jesus replies: "Fran, I'll go right into that appraisal with you, so take a deep breath and know that whatever happens, I'm in this with you.""Thanks, Lord," she smiles at Jesus' words of encouragement. It really helps her to keep her perspective. After all, she works for Jesus not for Marilyn, and as long as he is pleased with her work, she has the approval that is important."You know, Lord, my track record is good this year. I was second highest in sales volume in the whole office, and my account retention record is the best. And, you know, I got that big order from John Warton last week; nobody's been able to break that account before. So, I think I'm in good shape.""Do you think Marilyn will have anything to say about the D3 University account, Fran?" Jesus asks.The D3 University account is the one Fran had to give up because she refused to submit deceptive figures in her proposal. Marilyn gave it to Tom, a young salesman, who blew it and lost the business."Well, who knows, Lord, but with my good record, I don't see how she can refuse to give me a good rating on my appraisal. After all, I didn't lose that account; Tom did! Well, it's about time to go.” Fran starts to rush out."Why don't you have a quiet moment of prayer before you go in there? Do you have time?" Jesus asks.Fran smiles, as she shuts her office door. "Of course I do, Lord. I can't afford not to take time for prayer, can I?” She sits down beside Jesus and prays quietly, "Dear Father, give me your strength, your perspective, your calmness and your peace as I go into this appraisal. I ask you to put the right words in my mouth. I pray for a favorable appraisal, if that is your will. Thanks for giving me Jesus to be right here beside me during this. That helps a lot. I pray this in his name. Amen." Together they head toward Marilyn's office for the appraisal.
Jesus tells a parable in Matthew 20 that is a puzzle for us to understand. It’s the story of an employer who offers to hire workers for a certain amount, the workers agree to the pay, and they go to work in his vineyard. Some start working early in the morning and work all day, others are hired throughout the day, and finally at five o’clock this employer hires even more people to come and work in the vineyard for the last hour of the day.At the end of the workday, the employer pays them the exact same amount, even though some have worked twelve hours, some ten, and some just one hour. Well, as you can understand, those who worked the entire day were not happy campers.When they received the pay they had agreed to, they began to grumble against the landowner. ‘These who were hired last worked only one hour,’ they said, ‘and you have made them equal to us who have borne the burden of the work and the heat of the day’ (Matthew 20:11-12).To our human minds, this just seems wrong! It’s not fair! Those are probably some of the first words you ever uttered: It’s not fair! We’re born with an “it’s not fair” attitude—wanting things to be equal, fair, right. But this parable emphasizes the fact that the Kingdom of God is not a fair kingdom! Grace is not fair. God pours his grace and blessings on us though we never deserve them. The Kingdom of God is run on Jesus rules—and those are totally different than the way the world works.Jesus tells this parable to help his followers understand that he will bless those he chooses to bless and be generous to those he chooses, and we should always remember how unfairly God has treated us—and be very grateful. He doesn’t deal with us as our sins deserve. He doesn’t dispense grace to us based on our performance. His kingdom is not like ours; his rules are usually the opposite of what the world’s rules are.As Jesus tells this parable, this is how the landowner responds:But he answered one of them, ‘I am not being unfair to you, friend. Didn’t you agree to work for a denarius? Take your pay and go. I want to give the one who was hired last the same as I gave you. Don’t I have the right to do what I want with my own money? Or are you envious because I am generous?’ (Matthew 20:13-15).Jesus is trying to show us that God is God, and he runs the show. He rules the universe. It runs on the Jesus rules. But here’s the thing—the Jesus rules are meant to bring us peace and contentment, and they do when we live by them. It’s upside-down living, I know, but it brings immediate and eternal joy.His message in this parable is that we are to work without envy. We are not to compare ourselves to others and envy what others get or have or do. Envy will eat you alive. Proverbs 14:30 says: A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones.Is there some envy in your heart today—toward coworkers or others? It will rot your bones—destroy your health, shorten your life. If you want to work by Jesus rules, then you need to clean out the envy in your heart. Believe me, you’ll be so glad you did.In Matthew 21 Jesus tells the parable of the two sons. The father told the first son to go work in the vineyard. That son refused to go, but later he changed his mind and went. The second son agreed to go, but then he didn’t. Jesus asked, Which of the two did what his father wanted? Obviously the first son did what his father asked.One of the things this parable teaches us is that we should walk our talk. The second son gave the right answer, he looked and sounded good, but he failed to deliver. He was all talk and no walk. A good rule of thumb is “Under promise and over deliver.” That’s what the first son did. He delivered more than he promised. His talk wasn’t very impressive, but he actually went out and got the work done.Have you known people who could talk a really good game but never put the elbow-grease behind their talk?
Presented by Lauren StibgenWhat is clear is that as followers of Jesus Christ we are called to handle conflict differently.In verse 1 of John 16, Jesus says to his disciples, all this I have told you so that you will not fall away. Why is this significant? This singular verse follows John 15, and Jesus teaching about abiding. Just as we discussed earlier this week, Jesus knew we would face conflict. In fact, he is even more specific about this conflict in John 15:18. Jesus reminds us that if the world hates us know that it hated him before it hated you or me. Now let’s put this together. Jesus wants us to abide, because he knows we will need him. He knows we need his love, his friendship, his counsel and his joy.The conflicts in our day to day are heavy, but sometimes our Father is using these conflicts to help us to bear more fruit for his Kingdom. Yes, I said it. God uses these conflicts to grow us! John 15:2 states, every branch that does bear fruit he prunes that it will bear more fruit. Pruning is a verb meant to trim by cutting away dead or overgrown branches or stems, especially to increase fruitfulness and growth. Sometimes conflict happens to remove things from our lives that don’t belong. That could be at work too. God can use these moments to shine a light of our need for a greater reliance or abiding with him. Another word used in these verses in place of abide is remain. Remain or stay. How often are we not remaining with Jesus? Are we wandering too far from the perfect, life-giving vine of Jesus Christ?This is the vine of perfect love—a vine that says we can ask whatever we wish in Jesus’ name! A vine that doesn’t consider us servants but friends. A vine that apart from, we can do nothing. Don’t ever forget this. Apart from Jesus we can do nothing. This means conflict. We should not engage in conflict without seeking Jesus.Now, conflict isn’t the only pruning God uses in our lives, but surely when we are in the midst of conflict, God’s number one goal for us is how we seek him in the trial!
Presented by Lauren StibgenIs a past conflict weighing on you? Perhaps it is something someone did to you or is it the other way around? As Christians in the workplace, we must hold ourselves to the higher standards of a calling to live our life in a way that reflects Jesus to others. More specifically, we are called to the greatest command to love one another as Jesus Christ loved us. The problem can be sometimes that our past conflicts may impact how others view our actions now or how we view others.Perhaps you weren’t following Jesus when you started working. You lead a very different life now, but people that knew you “before” remember conflict you caused. Old behaviors where maybe you caused conflict can linger. Maybe you were prone to carry the office gossip, or perhaps you took credit for a project that you worked on with other colleagues! But now you walk away and try not to say anything, and you try to ensure that you give words of encouragement to others for the work they do. Your choice not to engage in these old behaviors any more may even isolate you from colleagues or even a boss. Those that knew you as the office gossip or credit grabber may not initially trust your good intentions.Paul is a terrific example of a follower who started off his vocation creating a lot of conflict. From the book of Acts, we know Saul was a persecutor of the followers of Jesus. They were truly frightened of Saul! After his miraculous conversion, Saul, now Paul, is brought back to Jerusalem to meet with the disciples. And, you guessed it, they were initially afraid to meet with him!What conflict with someone from the past has impacted you? Perhaps you have been on the receiving end of conflict. Maybe a colleague or boss placed the blame on you for a key project not being completed on time. Have you been on the receiving end of that gossip? Maybe you were called out for your faith or for holding a point of view that is contrary to others in your workplace.None of this builds trust or confidence. However, as followers of Jesus Christ, we are called to forgive others.And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins (Mark 11:25).I am not suggesting you should forget the actions of others, in fact, being aware of past occurrences can help you navigate them better in the future if they happen again. Forgiveness will allow you to continue to shine the light of Jesus at work and draw closer to God.
Presented by Lauren StibgenStaying quiet when you are in conflict is hard! I know I have been guilty of saying too much during a conflict—especially if it is something I am passionate about!Getting wound-up during a conflict is easy. You have a point of view, and you think it is the right point of view. Maybe you have stated your point of view, but it seems like no one is listening. Perhaps you are experiencing a conflict and don’t know what to say, or you feel plain defeated in trying to continually do the right things and it doesn’t seem to get you anywhere.Are your words empty? The Bible cautions of the words that we use.And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words (Matthew 6:7).Are you talking a lot but without a lot of substance?Proverbs 21:35 in the message translation also warns,Watch your words and hold your tongue; you’ll save a lot of grief (Proverbs 21:23).In the heat of a conflict, you can often say things you don’t want to say.My greatest encouragement is to tell you to remember it is ultimately God that fights your battles. He even calls us to be silent.The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still (Exodus 14:14).Have you ever tried deploying silence and waiting for the Lord to work on your behalf in a conflict? In the world this is counter intuitive. We are told to speak up and to fight for our point of view.Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight (Proverbs 3:5-6).In this silence and waiting, turn to the Lord in prayer. Those empty words that you may say during a conflict are better used in a silent prayer to God to step in for you. Prayer is powerful. It draws you near to the Lord and helps you increase your trust that he knows the plans he has for you.
Presented by Lauren StibgenSometimes when we are in the midst of a conflict, we talk about it with others to seek counsel. Seeking counsel from others is not a bad thing. In fact, Proverbs 15:22 tells us that without counsel plans fail, but with many advisers they succeed, and in Proverbs 24:6 we learn surely you need guidance to wage war, and victory is won through many advisers.Sometimes during a conflict, we seek counsel from people who may tell us what we want to hear instead of what we need to hear. You know that group of friends or colleagues that always seems to share your point of view, the ones that cheer you on and will tell you the other party is just plain wrong. In industrial psychology, we call this group think. Irving Janus, a Yale psychologist defines group think as a mode of thinking that people in a group engage in where striving for unanimity overrides the motivation to realistically appraise alternative courses of action.Finding people that will agree with us can certainly feel good in the moment, but it can have monumental consequences when it comes to resolving a conflict.In 1 Kings 22 Jehoshaphat sought counsel to discern whether he should go to battle. The prophets that he would typically take counsel from told him to go … for the Lord will give it into the king’s hand (1 Kings 22:6). When he asked if there was another prophet that he could inquire of, Micaiah was suggested. Jehoshaphat states, I hate him because he never prophesies anything good about me, but always bad (1 Kings 22:8). In the remaining verses of 1 Kings 22 we learn Jehosaphat goes to battle after not listening to Micaiah, and he lost his life.When you are seeking advice during a conflict, are you listening to wise counsel or are you listening to the voices that always agree with you? And more importantly are you seeking counsel from other believers?Good counsel asks questions; it challenges you and will seek to help you maintain and discern how you can come to a good resolution to a conflict. Good counsel will turn you toward God’s Word and to your relationship with Jesus as you look for solutions in whatever situation you are in.
Presented by Lauren StibgenSometimes the headlines are too much. These days the news is full of conflict, and it seems like this conflict has made its way into work in many ways. Whether it is continued conflict about gender or racial bias, income inequality, views on sustainability or environment or politics, we can count on people at work having differing opinions. And these opinions can bubble over into conflict when we least expect it.In John 16:33 we are reminded by Jesus in this world we will have tribulation. Tribulation is defined as great trouble or suffering. You can see how each of these issues we just mentioned can cause great trouble and suffering. Beyond these macro level issues that we are all aware of, what about the day-to-day conflicts at work? It could be something as simple as a colleague not completing their work in a timely fashion which causes your work to be late, or a boss that requires you to be in the office every day but only comes in once a week.While Jesus promises us all this conflict, he also tells us to take heart because he has overcome the world. Earlier in John 16:33, Jesus also tells us that in him, we will have peace.How can you find the peace of Jesus in these conflict moments? This week we will look at ways we can find the peace that Jesus offers. Perhaps some of your conflicts are self-inflicted. Are you listening to wise counsel? Are you listening and staying silent enough? Maybe you are saying too much, when it is God you should be reliant on.How closely you abide to your peace, Jesus, will be indicative of your greatest success or failure during times of conflict. Remember, Jesus promises us this conflict, but he also offers us the greatest solution in himself!If you are feeling overwhelmed by a macro level conflict in our world today, Jesus isn’t calling you to avoid it, he is calling you to rely on him! If you are going through a micro level conflict at work or at home, he isn’t calling you to avoid it either, he is calling you to rely on him!
Presented by Lauren StibgenAs a follower of Jesus Christ, I have thought a lot about what God wants me to do with conflict, and I’ve realized I can only control how I react and engage. I can’t control the other person or people with whom I may be in conflict.I have thought about different types of conflict, and while all require personal engagement, there are some in business that boil down to contracts and paperwork and have nothing to do with an interpersonal spat between two people. In both circumstances, God calls us to walk in a manner that reflects our kingdom status as we walk as ambassadors at work and in this world.Conflicts at work can be weighty. They can impact you personally, and they can impact an organization’s culture. Conflicts can ruin long-standing relationships and creative divides that close a business for good—especially a family-owned business.But one thing I learned about conflict, especially as a believer in Jesus Christ, is that God uses conflict to prune me. He uses these moments, whether personal or in business, to make me better for his kingdom. John 15:2 states: every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will bear more fruit.Pruning is a verb meant to trim by cutting away dead or overgrown branches or stems, especially to increase fruitfulness and growth. Pruning is good. Pruning is meant to help you and me do more for the kingdom. Pruning is meant to show us what to do more or less of. Pruning can remove people- it may even remove a job.I was curious about workplace conflict statistics, and I learned that at the high end, statistics state that 85% of employees report conflict at work. A study from the Peaceful Leaders Academy estimates that employees spend an average of 33.3 minutes a day in negative discussions about other colleagues! Even in a small company, let’s say 25 people, this results in 13.875 hours of time spent in potential conflict! Of employees who report conflict, 57% of them have seen this escalate to the level of physical altercation!A recent Harvard Business Review article reports that most conflicts at work are caused by differing perspectives or different personalities.I have learned that you can’t manage what you can’t measure, and apparently measuring conflict is important!We cannot avoid conflict, but we can strive for peace with others. What does this peacemaking look like and how do we do it? As we look at resolving conflict through our biblical lens, is it possible that others can align with us if they don’t believe what we do? The answer is mostly yes, and sometimes, no. However, if we are honest, even conflict with other believers can go unresolved. The answer is still sometimes yes and sometimes no.Matthew 5:9 tells us: “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called the children of God.”One of my all-time favorite books is The Peacemaker by Ken Sande. I have had this book since 2007 on my shelf and find that I have referenced it many times over the years to describe the good and bad of handling conflict. Sande’s visual of what he calls the slippery slope of conflict outlines what he calls peace-making, peace-faking and peace-breaking. Of course, the goal is to be in peace-making mode, but what about the other end of this spectrum? Peace-faking is described as an escape response to conflict with the ultimate response of suicide. Peace-breaking is described as an attack response to conflict with the ultimate end of murder. I just mentioned that 57% of employees have seen a conflict escalating to a physical altercation; let’s think about this as peace-breaking. Obviously, this is an attack response and is on the slippery slope to something even worse.What are the roots of most conflicts? I just mentioned the Harvard Business Review which said that differing perspectives and differing personalities cause most conflict, but it is much more specific than this.
God sent Moses to confront Pharaoh several times, to try to resolve their impasse in a way that would be best for both. Moses told Pharaoh, “Let my people go,” but Pharaoh refused to take the advice, and he paid a big price for it.As we’ve talked about constructive confrontation, I’ve encouraged you not to avoid confrontation when it is the right thing to do. But we also have to be aware that even constructive confrontation doesn’t always work, because we do not have control over how the other person will react.It’s important to remember even when we do the right thing in the right way, the confrontation may not have an immediate good result. The other person must ultimately choose how he or she will respond, and sometimes it doesn’t work out the way we had hoped. That doesn’t mean we failed.Jesus was often rejected by those he confronted with the truth, and he allowed people to walk away. Even when you believe you know what is best for other people, ultimately, you must be reconciled to the fact that they make their own choices.In some situations, you may have the power or the authority to execute an ultimatum if the other person refuses to conform. For example, if you confront an employee about their poor work habits and they refuse to change, they may indeed face the consequence of losing their job. But before you present the ultimatum to that person, try to achieve the desired result—changing that person’s poor work habits in a more conciliatory manner. It may work, and you won’t need to issue the ultimatum.In other situations, you may be powerless to enforce the change you are trying to achieve. Then, depending on the relationship, you must be prepared to live with it without allowing it to ruin your life, or you have to make changes if you are not prepared to live with it.I want to encourage you to get past your fear and resistance to confrontation and learn how to confront when it is right to do. It is good to speak the truth in love even if it is painful.
What is the best way to confront a person? When you are ready to confront, you need to open the conversation in a way that avoids sounding like finger-pointing. Think about it: Whenever someone approaches you in a finger-pointing mode, you most likely become defensive. If you begin the conversation with something that sounds like “you’re wrong and I’m right,” you won’t get to first base.Remember, we are aiming at constructive confrontation, an outcome that will be beneficial to everyone. We need to choose words carefully, words that don’t create a defensive reaction, if possible. Here are some examples of opening words that could get the conversation off in the right direction: “I wanted to talk with you personally because I believe between the two of us, we can find an appropriate solution to this issue that will help both of us in the end.” “I believe when there’s any kind of conflict between two people, the best way to resolve it is to bring it out in the open and discuss it. So, I decided it might be a good idea for us to talk about this issue, because I need to know how you feel about it.” “After some thought I decided the best thing I can do is express openly to you how I feel about this and give you an opportunity to express your feelings as well.”It is very smart to compose these opening words ahead of time. Recently a good friend told me of her need to confront her father, and she was very fearful of doing it. But it was necessary. I suggested she write it out so that when she talked with him, her nervousness wouldn’t cause her to stumble with her words and say it the wrong way. She did just that, wrote a couple of paragraphs before dialing his number, and then did what was difficult but necessary to do. She reported the confrontation went well, though she is not sure if he will take her advice. But at least she was able to get it said in the right way, and he listened.
Confrontation can be very constructive and helpful when it is done for the right reason, at the right time, and in the right way. Yesterday, I talked about searching our hearts to make certain our motives are pure. Always pray in advance so you don’t confront out of anger or selfishness.Confronting at the right time is very important. Let’s say you need to confront someone on your job because their poor work habits are affecting others, and it’s affecting the quality of the work effort of your organization. You know this situation needs to be confronted.Pick the right time and place. Never confront when others are present. It should always be a one-on-one encounter. Embarrassing or humiliating someone is sure to backfire on you, so choose a place that is private and conducive to a confidential conversation. Consider an off-site location. That often works best in business confrontations. Consider confronting over a meal. It seems to break down some barriers when we share a meal with someone. But again, it needs to be in a private setting.Timing needs to be carefully considered. Make sure you time your confrontation when you are in control of your own emotions. It’s not a bad idea to follow the “sleep on it” rule of thumb before confronting. Also time it when you have carefully considered what you will say.Consider timing as it relates to the other person as well. If you know this is the busiest week of the month for that person, you might be well advised to wait until next week. Or if you are aware that this person has recently experienced a personal problem or a health issue, take those things into consideration. Someone who is already struggling with another issue likely will not handle one more thing very well.Wise Solomon wrote: a prudent man gives thought to his steps (Proverbs 14:15) and a patient man has great understanding, but a quick-tempered man displays folly (Proverbs 14:29). Patience and prudence are very important as we think about confronting someone.
Constructive confrontation—does that sound like an oxymoron to you? I want to assure you confrontation can indeed be very constructive when it is done for the right reasons, at the right time, and in the right way.Remember when the children of Israel were held captive as slaves in Egypt? God told Moses, “Get up early in the morning and confront Pharaoh…and say to him, ‘This is what the Lord says: Let my people go, so that they may worship me’” (Exodus 8:20).Moses was sent on a mission of confrontation by the Lord. Unfortunately, Pharaoh chose not to heed Moses’ warning, and he suffered immense harm and eventual death as a result. But God kept sending Moses to confront Pharaoh so these disasters could be avoided. That was the purpose of the confrontations; it was a very constructive and appropriate action to take.Can you think of a person or a situation in your life right now that needs some constructive confrontation? How can you tell if it is constructive or not? Consider these questions: If the confrontation were successfully completed, would the confronted person benefit from it? Does this situation/person really require confrontation, or do you need an attitude change or more patience? Is your desire to confront imbedded in a desire to get even, or is it wrapped up in anger and vengeance?What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? You desire but do not have, so you kill. You covet but you cannot get what you want, so you quarrel and fight. You do not have because you do not ask God (James 4:1-2).Anytime the turmoil inside us is simply our own selfish unfulfilled desires or covetousness or anger, obviously we are the one who needs confronting and changing, first and foremost.As you think about the person or situation in your life that needs confrontation, search your heart in prayer before the Lord, read this passage from James 4, and make certain your motives are in line with God’s Word. Otherwise, you will be confronting in the power of the flesh for the wrong reasons, and I can assure you that will fail miserably.
If we took a survey of the things we don’t like to do, confrontation would come out somewhere near the top. Whether on the job or in our personal lives, most of us struggle with how and when to confront someone. It is not a pleasant experience, and therefore, we often avoid or postpone it.Confrontation can be one of the most constructive things we can do when it is done at the right time, for the right reason, in the right way.Let’s talk about what happens when we avoid confrontation. Suppose you and I worked together, and you were doing something that caused me difficulty in some way or another—you were doing something wrong. But instead of bringing it out in the open with you and trying to find a solution, I just let it boil up inside me until what was a small issue became a major stumbling block in my mind.Now in this hypothetical situation, instead of addressing the issue in a constructive way, I go into gossip and complaining mode about you. I tell another coworker what I don’t like about you. This other person is influenced by what I’ve told her about you, so now, instead of solving the problem, I’ve spread the problem further because I’ve infected someone else with my gossip.You can see how this could continue to spiral throughout the organization, until we have a major conflict involving not just two people, but several others as well. Has the problem been solved? No, not at all, because the one person who needs to be confronted is the object of gossip and backbiting, and she may not even realize her behavior has caused a problem.Suppose instead I decided to confront you, and I did it in such a way that there was a possibility you might handle it well. And suppose indeed you do handle it well. Now, you are in a position to correct whatever it is that is causing a problem—or to correct my perception—and you and I have an improved relationship. Nobody else needs to ever know anything about it. By constructive confrontation, we’ve eliminated tons of unnecessary stress and avoided all kinds of unpleasant encounters. Good idea? I think so.
As our story unfolded in part one, Louise, Fran's Christian coworker, is asked to approve an expense account of a senior account rep in her group—Jerry—and Louise knows he has included meals that were not with clients but were with his girlfriend. Louise talks with Fran about this dilemma, and Fran invites her over in the evening for prayer and a search of Scripture so Louise will know what to do. That's where our story left off.Just as Fran gets her children ready for bed, the doorbell rings, and Louise arrives."Whew," Fran says to Louise, "as much as I love them, it's always nice to have the peace and quiet that comes once they're in bed.""But they're so nice, Fran," Louise says. "They really are nice.""Thanks, Louise," Fran replies."Well, have you given the problem any more thought?" Louise asks."Off and on all afternoon," Fran says. "I couldn't come up with a specific verse which I thought gave a specific answer, could you?""Well, not exactly," Louise says. "But I know it would be wrong for me to approve the report, since I know Jerry is cheating. That much I know.""Right, I agree," Fran says. "So now we just have to consider your other options.""Let's start with prayer," Louise suggests, and they spend considerable time praying together. Both pray for wisdom from above, and Louise again confirms to the Lord that she is willing to do his will no matter what the cost will be to her. Fran prays their minds will be renewed by God's Spirit so they won't think incorrectly, and they will know God's good and perfect will."Louise," Fran says, "I suggest we start by listing all the options you have.""Good idea," Louise agrees, and they get a pad to write on. After some discussion, they come up with only two options: Turn in the report without Louise's approval on it and see what happens. Return the report to Jerry and ask him to complete it and turn it in himself.No longer is any consideration given to approving the report as it is, or lying in any way. They both agree that is not a biblical option."Let's think about what will happen in each case," Fran suggests. So, she and Louise write down everything they can think of. Option 1, they decide, is simply postponing the inevitable. The report would come back to Louise for completion, and she'd still be faced with the dilemma. Option 2 would mean a direct confrontation with Jerry and would undoubtedly cause him to be very upset with Louise. And Louise is fearful of retribution on his part. After all, Jerry’s been around a long time and has some pull in the company."You know," Louise says, "it's not like Jerry would even miss the $87, Fran. He makes plenty of money. You'd think I was talking about $87,000, the way he acts about this.""Remember Louise," Fran responds, "money makes people do crazy things—even small amounts of money. That's why Jesus said you can't serve God and Money, with a capital M. It has power over people to cause them to do all kinds of dishonest things, and often totally out of proportion to the amount.""You know, you're right," Louise says. "I remember last week I was filling out an expense account for myself and I was really tempted to put down a meal I didn't have to pay for. I had to force myself not to do it, because I wanted to pick up $15.""Oh, it's happened to me many times," Fran says, "and I haven't always done the right thing.""I guess I can't be too hard on poor Jerry," Louise says. "After all, if it weren't for Jesus, I'm sure I'd do the same thing. And even with Jesus, I'm tempted to cheat for a few measly dollars.""Yeah, you're right," Fran agrees. "You know, Louise, we didn't pray for Jerry. We should."And with that, they stop where they are to pray for Jerry, for his salvation, for his family, for Gail, his girlfriend, and for a change of heart to be willing to do the right thing. "I hadn't thought about praying for him," Louise says as they finish.
Let’s discuss is the vindictive, malicious, even vicious coworkers who are openly trying to cause you problems and do you harm.The first thing you need to understand is these people are in a world of hurt! They won’t admit it, but you can be certain they are miserable. It could be their hostile behavior is caused by the light and salt that emanates from you. You know, Jesus told us men love darkness, and if our lights are shining as they should, we will discover some people not only run from it, they fight it.Have you really stopped to think about what Peter is telling us when said: To this you were called, because Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in his steps (1 Peter 2:21).The only way you can learn to accept unjust suffering is to constantly remind yourself that by doing so, you have an opportunity to share in Jesus' suffering, which gives you the great privilege of learning to follow in his steps. Think about it: When you are going through tough waters, you feel very close to someone who's been there before you. When you have an opportunity to taste the kind of suffering Jesus drank fully for us, then you know him better. And that in turn brings his resurrection power into our lives.We've been talking about difficult coworkers, as though the problem is always with the other person and never with us Christians. How I wish that were true, but I know better because I know me! It would do us all good to take a close look and ask the Holy Spirit to reveal to us if we're guilty of any of these difficult characteristics in our relationships with our coworkers. Peter wrote our lives should be above reproach so when others try to find something bad to say about us, they have to manufacture it!I am reminded of what Jesus said to his disciples when they were having difficulty getting along with each other: If you want to be first in my kingdom, you have to be a servant (Matthew 20:26). A servant heart is the sum total of what we've been saying here. As difficult as that is at times, it's much easier than doing it our way. And the benefits we reap are eternal ones. Let's go for it.
Let me ask you, have you ever had to deal with a condescending and arrogant coworker? They talk down to you; they know everything; they're unteachable; they're always right. They're not very easy to endure!I have a friend who worked in a bank, and she was having trouble getting along with an arrogant-type coworker. After prayer and consideration, she started "Project Love," her name for a planned program on her part to bridge the gap between her and her coworker. First, she invited her to have lunch with her. The coworker was a little surprised, but she accepted. Through this, they got to know each other, and my friend discovered underneath the arrogant attitude was a very insecure, fearful person with many personal problems. Now they've become friends, and this woman has frequently turned to my friend for counsel and help.Thankfully my friend was willing to submerge her own normal resentment toward this arrogant, prejudicial coworker and extend herself to make a bridge. Jesus taught us to love our enemies, and this is an example of how we put that principle into practice. It's helpful to remember we don't have to like others to love them. Loving them means acting toward them in considerate and loving ways, even though you may not feel it.Dealing with a domineering coworkerHave you ever worked with someone who tried to manage everyone, including their manager? They're always telling you what to do, and everything in you wants to say, "Hey, you're not the boss around here!”Jesus told us to humble ourselves, and that's an important lesson for us to learn. Did you ever think we could use these relationships with domineering people to help us learn humility? It is humbling to keep your mouth shut and not bark back. It is even more humbling to take their direction! There may be times when that's the right thing for us to do. God is interested in developing Christ-like characteristics in us, and sometimes he uses unfair and uncomfortable circumstances for that purpose.Learning humility is how we become more and more transformed into the likeness of Jesus. If God has you in humility school right now, trust him to bring you through, and while you're there, learn your lessons well. Don't rebel and get bitter. Use it as a tool for righteousness. God is so good at doing that for us.Remember, if a confrontation is called for, our motives have to be carefully examined to make certain we're confronting for the other person's good, not just to vent our frustration.
Have you ever had a problem getting along with someone you work with? Most of us have, and it surely can cause a lot of grief, can't it? I can tell you Christians certainly are not immune to these interpersonal conflicts. We need some biblical principles to guide us. Let's consider the problems that arise when we deal with a negative coworker.Dealing with a negative coworkerOur worlds are full of negative thinking and talking people. It seems they have nothing good or encouraging to say about anything or anyone. If you've ever had to work closely with a very negative individual (and who hasn't!), you know just how tough it is to be around that person.This is one of those times when you need lots of compassion, because compassion lengthens your tolerance and helps you think about where the other person is coming from and what's causing them to be so negative. I think without Christ, I'd be negative in this world most of the time.There are a couple of proverbs which apply here.A cheerful look brings joy to the heart (Proverbs 15:30). One way to fight the irritation is to keep your own spirits up, and a smile on your face will help do that. Have you learned the secret of smiling?I know when I'm feeling down, frustrated, or irritated, if I can make myself smile, it starts to change the way I feel. I think God gave us the ability to smile to keep us going in the middle of tough situations. I encourage you to try smiling a lot more.An anxious heart weighs a man down, but a kind word cheers him up (Proverbs 12:25). Some kind words spoken to that negative person might be the key to getting him or her to open up and share their real feelings with you, and in so doing, you may discover their negative attitude is a cover-up for fear or anxiety. If they can share that with you, it gives you an opportunity to be of help to them. It doesn’t always work that way, but it's worth a try. Give them some kind words, in spite of their negativism.One warning here. Be careful you don't allow them to bring you down to their negative levels. Fight back by humming choruses to yourself. Quote Scripture to yourself. Change the conversation to something positive. Often, we allow negative people to set the tone and drag everybody else down with them. Guard your own mind against the onslaught of negativism.
I wonder how many of you are in a work environment where there is conflict among coworkers, perhaps even a personal conflict you are facing. It happens quite frequently, and as Christians, we need to be aware of biblical principles in dealing with these difficult coworkers.Yesterday we were talking about the lazy coworker, who doesn't do his or her share of the work. We pointed out one principle to consider is the extra-mile principle given in Matthew 5.I can hear some of you saying, "What? Are Christians supposed to be doormats? I don't buy that.” What I find myself and other Christians doing so often is rationalizing and watering down God's principles based on our own reasoning processes and the influence of this world's thinking on us.We think Jesus taught us to go the extra mile and love our enemies and all that, but he wasn't referring to this type of situation. And we begin to pick and choose our beliefs from Scripture. You know, I've decided if I'm going to make an error in applying God's Word, I'd like to err in favor of going too far rather than not doing enough, for a change.Now, let me assure you I don't think it's right for people to be lazy. But how other people act and react shouldn't change our commitment to God's principles. Matthew 5 gives principles for dealing with people who are doing the wrong thing; people who are against us, people who cause us problems and difficulties.I'm not saying we should do the lazy person's work forever, and never say anything. There are times when an open confrontation with the lazy coworker and/or with management is appropriate. Jesus confronted people frequently, but never to vent his own frustrations. He always confronted for their good and benefit, and I think that has to be our guiding principle in determining who and when to confront.What we must guard against is this build-up of bitterness, which can quickly happen when we're dealing with lazy coworkers. We can't blame bitterness on others. It's our responsibility to keep a root of bitterness from growing within us.
We typically spend eight hours a day on our jobs—with coworkers and peers whom we might never voluntarily choose to spend one-third of our waking hours each week. But there we are—together! And even though we're Christians, we're not immune to the irritations, aggravations, and outright conflicts that can exist between coworkers.Let's face it: coworkers can get to you! However, these relationships give us opportunities as Christians to demonstrate the power of Christ, to show that his presence makes a real difference in our everyday lives. Some close friends were at my home and several of them were sharing the struggles they are facing on their jobs with coworkers. But in each case, as they shared how God had helped them get along with those coworkers, they told of dying to their own rights and then watching God work miracles in those situations. And in each instance, their ability to deal in a Christ-like way with a difficult coworker has opened a door of witness on their jobs.In many of those situations, the coworker has not yet changed, and their behavior is extremely difficult. But even when they don't change, God can change us, so we are equipped to handle it properly. Often God just gives us grace to cope, grace to endure, grace to accept, even though the other person never changes. But isn't that just as great a miracle as changing the other person? I think so.Let's look at one type of difficulty we encounter with coworkers.Dealing with the lazy coworkerSometimes we have to work with a person who is lazy, and if we have to pick up his or her slack, we may find ourselves becoming bitter and resentful. And of course, that would show in sarcastic words, angry looks, body language, etc.In these situations, we need to know whether to confront the situation; to let the work go undone; to go to management; or to do the work for a while.One principle to consider is we are called to have an extra-mile attitude in our relationships with others. Read Matthew 5 beginning at verse 38 to refresh your memory on how Jesus taught us to go the extra-mile. Of course, this is not the world's solution, and it goes against all our natural reactions. But God may have good reasons for us to go the extra mile and be willing to do what we don't have to do.
I want to emphasize that the purpose of these stories is to help us remember that Jesus is with us all day every day on the job, and he wants to give us comfort, help, guidance, and strength. We must learn to practice his presence. Fran has some conversations with Jesus, which are obviously imaginary but based on Scripture. After all, that’s how Jesus speaks to us—through his Word and his Spirit. So, with that, let's begin our story."Fran, you got time for lunch today?" Louise asks as she pokes her head around Fran's door. Louise and Fran have become good friends, and it's great to have a fellow believer on the job to talk to. They meet for lunch once a week to pray for the company and for the people they work with. It has been a wonderful time of fellowship, and they've seen lots of answers to prayer.But this is not their prayer day, so Fran asks, "Something wrong?""Well, kinda," Louise replies. "I just need some advice, but I know how busy you are so...""No, let's do it," Fran answers. And with that they head to the cafeteria. Sitting down in a quiet corner, Fran says to Louise, "You look worried. I have a feeling something is bothering you.""Yeah, you're right," Louise agrees.After asking God's blessing on the food, Louise says, "Fran, you know how Marilyn made such a point in the staff meeting last week about our expense accounts and what’s allowed and what isn’t, especially as it relates to meals.""Yeah," Fran replies. "She told me that some people have really taken advantage of that policy.""Well," Louise says, lowering her voice, "I’m supposed to approve all expense accounts for those in my group before they go to Marilyn, and she made it clear we’re supposed to make certain all the charges are in compliance with company policy. That's what I'm upset about. Jerry is—well—he's lying about his expenses, charging meals to the company that are not business related, and today we had some words about it.” Jerry is the senior account manager in Louise’s group."What kind of words?" Fran asks."He turned in his expenses with receipts for meals that were not with clients," Louise explains. "So, I gave them back to him with a note about the meals policy, and he calls me in his office, shuts the door and says, 'Since when are you telling me what meals I can charge and what I can’t?'"Louise lowers her voice further. "I told him these were the new instructions I had received from Marilyn and that it was my responsibility to make sure all charges were accurate. Then he said, 'Well, I've been working for this company for twelve years, and I won’t have someone checking my expense accounts.’”Louise looks at Fran and shakes her head. "What did you say?" Fran asks."I said something like 'Jerry, I'm just following instructions. Marilyn told us to be responsible for these expenses and make sure they’re right. What do you want me to tell her?'"Louise takes a deep breath. "He threw the report at me and said, 'You just note those meals are client meals.’ Then he gave me names of two clients to put on the report, but I knew it wasn’t true. So, I said, 'Gee, Jerry, I think you must be mistaken.' And I reminded him they weren’t client meals. He stared at me with a look that could kill, and said, 'You're supposed to do as I direct you to do, so just do it, Louise. Don't make a big deal out of it.'""Oh, great," Fran says to Louise, "he really put you in a tough spot. What happened then?""Fran, I'm ashamed to tell you, but I didn't have the guts to stand up to him. He is so intimidating," Louise replies. "So, I just took the report and walked out."Louise is obviously very upset with herself. "Fran, I didn't do the right thing. You know, I just kept thinking about how much I need this job, and I know Jerry. He is politically connected, and I would never win in a fight against him.” Louise puts her fork down and pushes back from the table, very agitated."Louise,
I was asked a very interesting question by a woman who had come to hear me speak. She said to me, "Are you a liberated woman?” That question caused me to stop and ask: "What is a liberated woman?” Women's liberation became a much-used term during the last two or three decades, and on this day as we celebrate the freedom we have in our country, it’s a good idea to ask that question again: What is a liberated woman?For some women, to be liberated means they are free from the control of men, or from the traditional roles that women have been confined to in the past. There are some women who would say a liberated woman is one who is free from the sexual restraints of the past and has sexual freedom. Often liberated women are defined by their status: how far up the ladder they have climbed; how much money they make; how much power they have, assuming the higher you climb, the more you make and the more power you have, the freer you are.What does that term mean to you: a liberated woman? Are you one? Do you know any? How do you recognize one when you see her?Let me begin by saying I consider myself a very liberated woman! Indeed I do! I'm liberated, set free, because I've been set free by Jesus Christ. Feminism does not offer me that freedom, no organization can offer me that. No job can offer me that. No amount of money or power can give me freedom. No other person can liberate me. But Jesus has set me free.I can certainly understand the desire and passion for freedom and liberation that women feel. Everybody wants to be free. And throughout world history we've seen incredible struggles for freedom from slavery, freedom from aggression, freedom from abuse, freedom from discrimination. All of those struggles are understandable and legitimate.I appreciate the freedom women now have to pursue any career for which they are qualified. It wasn't long ago that many of those opportunities were either denied to women or made extremely difficult.But my friends, as one who has pioneered some new paths for women, let me tell you that you won't find true, lasting liberation in a career, no matter how good it may be, nor in new role definitions or worldly success or status or money or power. Freedom is found only in Jesus. That is not a trite cliché'; it is truth.That’s the freedom to celebrate—the freedom that comes in knowing your sins are forgiven and eternity with Christ is sure. I’m a liberated woman! I hope you know the same freedom only Christ can give.
Often what we need to do is re-learn something we’ve already learned! As I start to prepare the programs, I think, "I don't have anything new to say.” And I start to panic because I haven't got a new idea or a new topic to present. But God reminds me repetition is the way we learn. Do you, like me, have to learn and re-learn and re-learn the lessons God wants to teach you? I'm amazed at the patience of our Lord, as I see how slow I am to truly learn and obey all I know.God will work on one area of my life, and I'll think I've made some progress. Then I look back a few weeks or months later and realize I need to learn again what God has already taught me. How easily I forget; how easily I go back into old habits and wrong ways of thinking.What I'm learning from all this is I must be prepared to re-learn many times the things I've already learned. I must go back and repeat because repetition is absolutely essential for me. I think of the verse to the old hymn which says, "Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it; prone to leave the Lord I love.” Truly "prone to wander" is a good description of me. How about you?Let me encourage you, if you find yourself in this same dilemma, learn to re-learn. Go back and listen again to what God has already taught you. Do a lot of review. If there were books which spoke to your heart, read them again. If you've heard messages that made an impact on you, listen again and again. Repeat and repeat what you already know.That's another good reason to keep a journal of the things God is saying to you and what you've been learning from the Bible, so you can go back and re-read those things which you'll otherwise forget. It's a good way to re-learn.Plan to be a re-learner, so that you're not so prone to wander from the good and basic lessons God has already taught you.
There is a story in Joshua 9, which is very relevant to us today. Joshua and his people were doing very well, and all the neighboring countries were frightened of them because of their victories and the power they had from the Lord.One of their neighbors, the Gibeonites, decided to trick Joshua into a peace treaty. They made themselves look tired and dirty, like they had traveled a long way, and came to Joshua asking for a treaty. Verses 14 and 15 tell us:The Israelites sampled their provisions but did not inquire of the Lord. Then Joshua made a treaty of peace with them to let them live, and the leaders of the assembly ratified it by oath (Joshua 9:14-15).Here was a business transaction facing the Israelites. A group of people made them an offer. The men of Israel looked at the outward evidence, decided it looked like a good deal to them, and signed the bottom line.They found out later they had been deceived. The facts were not as they appeared to be, and they had made a strategic mistake. Why? Because they trusted in their eyes and their minds, and did not inquire of the Lord.There are times we don't think we need to consult the Lord; it's just a cut and dried situation in our view. We make decisions in our own strength, based on our human reasoning. And that gets us in trouble.Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight (Proverbs 3:5-6).Do you remember when Jesus told Peter to go fishing? Peter's own understanding of fishing told him there were no fish there, since he had fished all night and caught nothing. Besides, it was the wrong time and place to fish. But because Jesus told him to, Peter went fishing and caught more fish than ever before. Peter had to learn, as do we, you can't just depend on your own understanding.Leaning on our own understanding is the norm especially in the business world. But, as Christians, we should take all our decisions to the Lord and ask for his wisdom. Sometimes our own understanding is very shortsighted and incomplete. We need the eternal wisdom of our Savior; we need to inquire of the Lord.Remember to inquire of the Lord in any decision you face. Don't lean solely on your own understanding. That can get you in trouble.
You know, everybody needs encouragement and help at times. As I read 2 Corinthians 7, I realized even the great Apostle Paul had difficult times when he needed other people. He said in verse 5:For when we came into Macedonia, this body of ours had no rest, but we were harassed at every turn—conflicts on the outside, fears within (2 Corinthians 7:5).Doesn't that describe the way you feel at times? Conflicts without, fears within? But this is the spiritual giant, Paul, and it surprises us to realize he would have these same feelings. We really need to remember that positions of prominence do not isolate anyone from being human. Paul was tired and fearful. He needed help.Where did his help come from? He goes on to say, but God, who comforts the downcast, comforted us by the coming of Titus (2 Corinthians 7:6). He needed a friend at his side to comfort him, and so Titus came along. We could say to Paul, "But wasn't it enough to have the Lord there?” And Paul would respond, "The Lord was there in the person of Titus. He comforted me by sending Titus."That's how the Body of Christ should function. God wants to use us in each other's lives as messengers of comfort and encouragement, to pick up each other at those weary and frightened moments of our lives. God has given us each other for that purpose.Paul goes on to say he was comforted by the good report Titus brought to him of the concern for his welfare by his friends in Corinth. Paul needed to know they cared, they hadn't forgotten him, they still loved him.How often do we miss these opportunities to be God's comfort in the lives of others? How often do we need to be by a friend's side when they're experiencing dark days? Or send a message to them—by email or snail mail or on the phone—just to say, I care.Hallmark Cards has coined the phrase, "When you care enough to send the very best.” When we as Christians care enough about each other, we can send our very best, which is the comfort of God pouring through us to those who need it.Is there someone in your life today who needs a Titus? Ask God to show you and allow him to use you as his agent of comfort and encouragement.
Have you read the verse which says, "Be kind to everyone who is kind to you. Be kind to the people you like. Be kind when you want to impress someone, or when there's something in it for you"? No, you haven't seen that verse in Scripture, but Paul wrote to Timothy the Lord's servant must not be quarrelsome but must be kind to everyone (2 Timothy 2:24).I once witnessed a situation in which a Christian sister was obviously unkind to a person simply because she didn't like that kind of person. Based on her prejudices and some bad experiences she had, she had classified a group of people as undesirable. So, she was obviously unkind to this person, and it was hurtful and harmful. Another person with whom she is sympathetic came in, and she was very kind and caring to her.I watched that interaction and my heart hurt to see a Christian treat someone unkindly. Then I realized I probably do similar things all too often. I mean, it's easy to be kind to people who seem to deserve our kindness. But the Bible says we are to be kind to everyone. That includes strangers, people who irritate us, people who are not kind to us—everyone includes everyone!Once I was unkind to a clerk at a hotel who was not very efficient at her job. Her lack of efficiency inconvenienced me just a bit, and though I didn't say anything, I'm sure the look on my face and my body language was most unkind.How easy it would have been for me to say something kind to her, to make her feel a little more comfortable, to forget my minor inconvenience and try to help her a bit. The Holy Spirit convicted my heart as I walked away, reminding me the Lord's servant must be kind to everyone—even people who don't do their jobs as well as they should.Praise the Lord we don't have to do this in ourselves, because we'd never make it. The Holy Spirit within us is there to give us the power to be kind to everyone. I'm praying specifically now that God will help me be kind to strangers, for that seems to be an area where I often fail.Where do you often fail to be kind? Shore that area up with prayer, and ask God to help you be kind, as the servant of the Lord should be, to everyone.
I have to admit, I am not a graceful person. In my first Christmas break of college, my mother lined up private lessons with a woman who coached me on how to be graceful. Now, for my mother to spend money on such lessons was an indication of how much help I needed! I was not then—and still am not to this day—graceful.But I’m happy to report that though I may never be graceful, I can be grace-full—full of grace. That is not contingent on my agility or nimbleness or any physical attributes. It is, instead, contingent on my openness to the grace of God and my willingness to let it fill my life.In writing of our Savior, John says, The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth (John 1:14). Jesus was and still is full of grace. As believers in Jesus Christ, you and I are in the process of being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory. We are to be filled with his Spirit, and therefore, we have the incredible opportunity to be filled with grace. Like Jesus, we can be full of grace.When asked what the one thing that sets apart Christianity from all other religions, C. S. Lewis responded, “Oh, that’s easy. It’s grace.” No other religion offers God’s love and redemption coming to us free of charge, as a gift, no strings attached, no performance required, no standards to meet. Only Christianity dares to make God’s love unconditional. That’s because Christianity has the only qualified Savior, Jesus Christ.I want to encourage you to become very intentional about being a woman—or a man—who is grace-full; full of God’s grace. It must become more than a cliché, more than words we say or songs we sing. God’s grace needs to permeate every corner of our being so we are living examples of his grace. And then, when we are full of God’s grace, we can become grace dispensers.The song, “Amazing Grace,” is sung all over the world by people who have no understanding of its message of salvation through Jesus. But the idea of grace appeals to everyone.But what does it mean for you and me in our world today to live grace-full lives? What does that look like? I’d like to give you the ABCs of grace-full living. Here is “A”:A- AbundantJesus said, “I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full” (John 10:10b). Jesus wasn’t talking about being full of money, earthly success, or freedom from problems. He was talking about a life that is grace-full!In 2 Corinthians 9:8 we read: And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work. When the grace of God fills us, then it must flow out to others in the form of good works. What good works? The good works you were created to do. Ephesians 2:10 says, We are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.Here are a few examples of how we dispense grace to others: Someone is sick; you minister to their needs. Someone is rejoicing over good news; you rejoice with them. Someone has a broken heart. You cry with them, listen to them, sit with them, and console them. Someone is wandering away from God. You confront them in love, admonish them, and help them to come back into fellowship. Someone is lost in sin, without Christ. You share the gospel in every way you can, lovingly planting seeds of truth in her life. Someone needs financial help. You give out of love and concern. You teach the Word of God in a small group; you organize prayer for your company; you begin a Bible study at work or at home; you invite others to hear the Word of God.These are just a few ways we become grace dispensers to others, abounding in good works.I can testify to you from personal experience that the abundant life Jesus promised us comes in knowing God is using you in the lives of...
Presented by Julie BusteedWe’ve explored what it means to practice hospitality in everyday life, but how does that translate to our jobs? Today, there’s an entire hospitality industry—hotels, restaurants, travel, and event services. You can even earn a degree in hospitality management! For those working in that field, hospitality is built into the job: welcoming strangers, serving with kindness, offering guidance, and meeting the practical needs of guests.But even if you don’t work in that industry, the call to hospitality still applies. In the workplace, it might look like showing patience and grace to coworkers and clients, offering help when someone is overwhelmed, or simply pausing your own agenda to listen. It’s that same outward focus—seeing others and responding with care.The greatest example of hospitality is Jesus himself. He consistently met people’s practical needs with compassion and love.In Mark 8, he responds to a hungry crowd.“I have compassion for these people; they have already been with me three days and have nothing to eat. If I send them home hungry, they will collapse on the way, because some of them have come a long distance” (Mark 8:2-3).Jesus saw their need—and he acted. He miraculously provided food when none was available.In Mark 1, a man with leprosy begs Jesus for healing.Moved with compassion, Jesus reached out and touched him. ‘I am willing,’ he said. ‘Be healed!’ Instantly the leprosy disappeared, and the man was healed (Mark 1:41-42 NLT).Jesus saw the unseen people. He touched the untouchable, welcomed the outcasts, and made space for the overlooked—women, children, lepers, Gentiles, and sinners.Then of course when Jesus washed his disciples’ feet at the last supper he beautifully demonstrated how to practice hospitality—to show God’s love in practical ways and serve them—all for his glory.Hospitality isn’t all about entertaining. It’s about seeing others and serving them with love. Whether it’s a kind word, a helping hand, or a listening ear, it’s all for God’s glory.I hope you’re encouraged to practice hospitality wherever you are—including your workplace. Because when we serve others, we reflect the heart of Christ.
Presented by Julie BusteedHave you ever caught yourself grumbling about serving others? The Apostle Peter addresses this issue in 1 Peter 4:9-11.“Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms. If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen (1 Peter 4:9-11).Did you catch that? You and I are called to offer hospitality without grumbling! That means showing God’s love by serving others with the gifts he’s given us—and doing so without complaining.Peter gives examples of how to serve others using our God-given gifts. Whether it’s through speaking truthfully from God’s Word or helping one another with all our strength. Everything you and I have is from him, and we are called to use it for his purposes.Hospitality can take many forms: Listening with care Sending an encouraging message Reaching out to someone who’s struggling Praying with or for someone Helping with a task or technology Running errands or grocery shopping Visiting someone who is homeboundPeter emphasizes we’re not to complain about this kind of service. Why? So that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. When we serve others with a willing heart, we reflect Christ and bring glory to God.Offering hospitality can be inconvenient, expensive, even aggravating at times. But you and I are called to pursue this with a good attitude. It pleases God and is a witness to how Christians are meant to love and care for one another.
Presented by Julie BusteedHave you ever been described as a “Martha?” When I say “Martha,” I’m referring to the account of Mary and Martha in Luke 10 which says:As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!” “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her” (Luke 10:38-42).Can you relate to Martha? I certainly can. I often find myself caught up in the preparations—focused on the details, planning, organizing—because I genuinely enjoy it. But sometimes like Martha, I get so consumed by all the things that serving becomes a burden rather than a joy.Jesus gently reminded Martha—and me—that “few things are needed and indeed only one!” I need that reminder: to keep my focus on my guests, to be present, listen, and offer encouragement.Hospitality should be outward-focused. It’s not that preparation is wrong. It’s good and necessary—but it shouldn’t take center stage. The priority is the guest, not the checklist.It seems to me that Martha truly wanted to give her best. She opened her home and gave of herself and time, but she became frustrated when her sister Mary had a different priority.Interestingly in John’s gospel we see a later moment in Mary’s life. After Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead, she and her siblings hosted Jesus and his disciples again:Here a dinner was given in Jesus’ honor. Martha served (John 12:2a).Martha is still serving, still practicing hospitality, but it seems to me she’s not distracted. Her priorities have changed.That’s my prayer for me and you. That we would continue to practice hospitality—showing God’s love through our service, without letting the details overshadow the purpose.
Presented by Julie BusteedWe are looking at what it means to practice hospitality as the Apostle Paul encourages us to do in Romans 12.Certainly, part of this is entertaining guests—and usually that’s a planned event. But what about the unexpected guests?In Genesis we read about the patriarch Abraham and the three “visitors.” You can read the entire story in Genesis 18, but let me give you the highlights:The Lord appeared to Abraham near the great trees of Mamre while he was sitting at the entrance to his tent in the heat of the day. Abraham looked up and saw three men standing nearby. When he saw them, he hurried from the entrance of his tent to meet them and bowed low to the ground. He said, “If I have found favor in your eyes, my lord, do not pass your servant by. Let a little water be brought, and then you may all wash your feet and rest under this tree. Let me get you something to eat, so you can be refreshed and then go on your way—now that you have come to your servant (Genesis 18:1-5).The story goes on to describe how he and Sarah quickly prepare meat and bread—the finest things they had on hand—and serve their three unexpected guests. They used what they had on hand. This is a great reminder that according to the Bible, being hospitable isn’t about being perfect and having everything in place. It’s more about being open and welcoming and offering to share what I have and focus on the relationship more than the presentation.Abraham saw his visitors’ needs and met them. Their feet needed washing from the journey. They needed to escape the heat of the day in a shady place. He was eager to show hospitality and acted on it. My guess is they were not planning to host any visitors that day. But Abraham saw these visitors and was quick to greet them and invite them to stay and be refreshed. It may not have been convenient for him. There was a sacrifice of time and resources. Yet, he was welcoming and generous.What an example this is to you and me. Hospitality is not about having the perfectly clean house or a meal that’s been planned and prepared in advance. It’s opening our homes to welcome those in need. It’s setting aside our agendas, seeing others, and reaching out.
Presented by Julie BusteedWhat is the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word hospitality? Do you picture having friends over for dinner or hosting overnight guests? We are looking at what it means to show hospitality from a biblical perspective.When I have guests over it usually involves a lot of planning and preparation ahead of time. I’m thinking about menus, making lists, going grocery shopping, planning activities, cleaning the house—all to make guests feel comfortable and welcome. And I enjoy doing it. But is that really what the Apostle Paul is talking about in Romans 12?Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality (Romans 12:13).What does it mean to practice hospitality? It’s an unusual phrase to me; it stands out to me. The definition of practice means to put something into action—not just think about it. Hospitality comes from the Latin word “hospes” meaning host, visitor, or stranger. It focuses on the treatment of strangers and visitors, not just friends.This is not the first thing that comes to mind when I think of hospitality. But I think it’s what Paul means: actively seek to welcome and care for those you don’t already know. The ESV translation puts it this way, seek to show hospitality. It’s not just about entertaining—it’s about looking for people in need and reaching out.I also like the way The Message paraphrases it: be inventive in hospitality. Be creative about showing God’s love to others who are in need. There’s not just one way to practice hospitality. Use the gifts God has given you to practice hospitality.Biblical hospitality goes beyond dinner parties. It’s about seeing and serving others—especially those who might feel overlooked or alone. Maybe it’s inviting someone who needs encouragement or having a homesick student over for a meal.The Bible doesn’t say this is a requirement for only certain people with specific gifts—not just for those of us who like to entertain guests. I think all of us are called to “practice” hospitality. It’s not dependent on our own feelings, living conditions, talents, or resources. It’s about putting God’s love into action in practical and meaningful ways.
Presented by Lauren StibgenLove. This rich, often misused word in our culture is all over the Bible. We seem to hold it loosely in today’s culture. Using the word love to say we love a particular food, the way something looks, or how we feel about things, people, and activities. How many times have you proclaimed, “I love this and such!”These cultural exhortations don’t meet the biblical standard of love we are commanded to show as followers of Jesus Christ.As followers of Jesus Christ, we are called to the greatest commandment in Matthew 22:37-39. We are told, You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind…and you shall love your neighbor as yourself.1 John 4:19 gives us the added standard of we love because he (God) first loved us.How did Jesus love us? Sacrificially, unconditionally, and wholly. He loved us so much he died for our sins.God’s love is not loose. God’s love is described as steadfast and enduring, sacrificial, unconditional, personal, and transformative. This is a hesed love. Often translated as lovingkindness, mercy, and steadfast love. It encompasses how much God loves us, and how he shows love for us.As we focus on how to show God’s love to others and remember that God’s love is constant, we also need to be honest with ourselves. There are worldly blocks that keep us from showing God’s love to others. As the world creeps in, the love we are called to show gets dimmed.One of the fruits of the spirit I often need to work on is patience or long-suffering. Of course, the opposite of patience is impatience. One of the ways we can show people God’s love is through how we display patience. When we are the opposite—impatient—we can scarcely show love.How patient was God with you in your sin? In your wandering? Before you accepted Jesus? What about after? Clearly, we are having a conversation about being impatient believers. Guess what, God is still patient with us, bearing with us in our sin.Impatience can show itself in how we deal with others and how we deal with situations. Sometimes at the same time!Romans 12:12 tells us to rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.It is natural to impatiently await the end of a hard trial in our lives. Whether it is a health hardship, financial hardship, or something else, what matters is how we show others how we are dealing with whatever it is. Part of showing God’s love in tribulation is modeling how our understanding and belief in his faithfulness. It can open conversations with others about why we are different and give us a wonderful opportunity to talk about God’s love for us!We may also be impatiently waiting to hear about something good! Perhaps it is a promotion or a new job. Again, are you impatiently displaying your waiting, or are you telling others how you trust God’s timing for you. Being filled with impatience whether in the waiting or a trial doesn’t leave us much room to think about how we can love others.Ephesians 4:2 tells us we should act with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love.But what about when you don’t feel very patient and loving? Is there a person at work who is on your last nerve? Whether it is a colleague, boss or subordinate, how can you be patient with them even when you really don’t want to?Romans 12:12 offers some of the best advice—be constant in prayer. When I am feeling impatient, this is my go-to. I pray to God to give me the patience he has shown to me. And I ask others to pray very specifically for my patience!I find a close follower of impatience to be judgement. Whether it is judging ourselves harshly or judging someone else, we clearly block both experiencing God’s love ourselves or showing it to others.2 Corinthians 5:10 reminds us that we all must appear before the judgement seat of Christ, so that each of us may receive what is due us for the ...
Presented by Lauren StibgenHas someone ever asked you if you live to work or work to live? Did you know this question is one asked on some assessments to evaluate whether a candidate is a fit for a company culture? I will admit, I was a live to work woman for a long time. Over the years I have shifted more to a work to live mentality, but I know God calls us to strike a balance. After all, he created us for work!Living to work means you get up each day with work as your number 1! Working to live feels more like, I cannot wait for my day to end so I can be doing life. If you were hiring someone, how would you want them to answer this question? While I think we likely have seen a shift in how many would answer this question, I wonder how this sits for a prospective employer. If you are a manager or business owner, you want to hire people who are motivated to come to work and do a good job! But I would argue you also want employees who have a good balance of loving their life!As employees, God calls us to do good work as we are his representatives every day, but we need to be mindful we don’t get too focused on the live to work mentality! It can be so tempting to pour time into our work, especially if we enjoy our colleagues and our work. The more we live to work, the easier it is for that busyness to be all consuming!Jesus cautions us of the live to work mentality. We see this contrast between Mary and Martha in Luke 10:38-42. Martha is busy and distracted with serving and Mary is sitting at Jesus feet listening to his teaching.Jesus tells Martha she is anxious and troubled about many things but one thing is necessary.One thing is necessary, and that is coming to the feet of Jesus. If you and I are anxious and distracted by living to work, we will clearly miss opportunities to both experience God’s love and show God’s love to others.Striking a balance, making God first and loving others a close second, is where we need to rest.
Presented by Lauren StibgenHave you set some goals lately: personal or professional? How are they impacting how you show God’s love? Goals are important: personally and professionally. In the context of work, goals help us understand our part in a larger vision or project that impact our organization. Outside of work, goals can help us focus on achieving in other aspects of our life like health or finance.I would argue any good goal can go bad, especially when it takes us away from what is most important to God. Again, Scripture tells us God wants us to love him and love others as we love ourselves.How full is your goal set both at work and personally? Is this filling your time so much that you are not able to love God or love others? We live in a metric-based, title-hungry culture. When we set goals, how are we being measured, and what is the reward?When the measurement and reward become more important than God, we start walking down that slippery slope.Are you in sales? Perhaps you take an extra lead or two that will help win a trip or sweeten a bonus, but this causes a colleague to miss their goal by a margin. Or maybe you end up staying late to get more done and skip a church commitment.Are you working a lot of overtime to make your metrics look better than others at work and miss time connecting with a friend in prayer?Perhaps you feel like you are pulling a lot of weight on a project and complain about a colleague, not knowing they are suffering a personal hardship.Personally, have you set goals that compromise your time spent in God’s Word, or are you doing activities you enjoy but keep you away from showing love to your family?Measurement and reward: They are not bad but can become bad when they are not balanced with our thoughts about God and our love for others.We are already winning in the eyes of God if we have accepted Jesus as our Lord and Savior. How can we show this to others? Maybe you pass those sales leads along, help balance the workload to make your team look better or ask questions when a colleague is falling behind on a project. We are called to walk differently. Our reward is much greater than any trip or title we could ever achieve here on earth!How can we show others this type of love? Not the pizza and coffee love. Not the “I love my dog” love. Not the “I love the way the color looks on you” love. I mean the “I want to share life with you” love—the proverbial “I would give to someone event if it hurt” love. The love that weeps with those who weep and rejoices when others rejoice.When we are too busy, it is easy to give the glossy heart and flowers love. It is harder to focus on and think about how God wants us to show his love to others.
Presented by Lauren StibgenA culture of busyness can keep us from showing God’s love. How loosely do we hold this word? Like our notions about time, we also confuse love. A large part of our problem is we love everything and everyone. So, when you pause to think about how to show God’s love to others or to explain to them what God’s love feels like, maybe it gets lost in the emptiness we often attribute to this word.We all love. When thinking about using the word love, my mind is filled with red and pink hearts, flowers, candies, and other visual or physical ways we see or experience love. I also think about how many times I have used the word love in the prior weeks. I love having coffee with my friends. I love the flowers I buy from a local farmstand. I love my husband. I love my dogs. I proclaim how much I love a friend’s dress. I love pizza. I loved our zoom gathering this month. I think you see my point.We fly loosely with the word love, and if we are too busy to reflect on how special God’s love for us is, it will be very hard to show it to others. While everything I noted already can help us show God’s love to others, we need to go deeper into the meaning of what God wants us to show others.God’s love is described as steadfast and enduring, sacrificial, unconditional, personal, and transformative. Perhaps you have heard the word Hesed. This is the deep conventual love in action that God gives to us as a promise.There is nothing we can do to change God’s love for us. It never fades. We feel God’s sacrificial love in John 3:16.For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life (John 3:16).We see his steadfast and enduring love for those that, even though they wander like Israel, God still loves them.We see his transformational love in Jesus’ abundant healing ministry.How can we show others this type of love? Not the pizza and coffee love. Not the “I love my dog” love. Not the “I love the way the color looks on you” love. I mean the “I want to share life with you” love—the proverbial “I would give to someone event if it hurt” love. The love that weeps with those who weep and rejoices when others rejoice.When we are too busy, it is easy to give the glossy heart and flowers love. It is harder to focus on and think about how God wants us to show his love to others.
Presented by Lauren StibgenHow are you filling your calendar each day? These days, it is harder to be disconnected and unseen. Even through the lens of work, digital connection and the importance of social media can fill our moments more than we realize. Most companies have an entire marketing and social media strategy, but now we live in a time where personal branding and social media strategies are noted as important for our careers.Gone are the simple days of a resume, and if you are in a job search, it can feel overwhelming. The traditional outplacement or career coach has taken on a new role that focuses on image, connection, and perhaps even developing a website. While the first use of the term personal brand dates back to 1997 in an article in Fast Company Magazine, the notion of personal brands as a strategic career asset is relatively recent. While created in 2003, LinkedIn has exploded in the recent years alongside other platforms.You may be thinking, Lauren, what does this have to do with how I show God’s love?! My answer—simply, if we don’t pay enough attention to the need for our own attention, it is easy to keep the focus on ourselves and not on others. Now, I am not suggesting a personal brand is bad, but I do want us to think about the time it takes. What are you doing in your spare moments to create your personal brand? If you are in a job search this may be a greater amount of time, but if you are working full-time, this easily creeps into spare moments and evenings. How much time are you spending focused on yourself? And if you are focused on your personal brand, how can you first spend that all important time with God? And how can you show God’s love if you are constantly consumed with the social and digital aspects of this personal brand culture?Have you ever paused to consider what the Lord wants for our self-promotion? How would God want us to get noticed? How is God part of your personal brand?And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you (Matthew 6:5-6).First, as we balance showing our faith at work, we need to consider our intentions always. Are our intentions genuine, or are we trying to be seen? Second, invite God into this practice through prayer. How can he guide how you present yourself? Finally, pause and make sure you are looking at the needs of your neighbors. Don’t spend so much time consumed with your digital brand that you forget the importance of connecting with others. Maybe they are struggling with some of the same things. How can you invite God and others into this new era of extra busyness that can easily cause too much self-focus?
Presented by Lauren StibgenWe live measuring time: minutes, hours, days. We count just about everything that we do in time. We use time to mark special occasions, like birthdays, anniversaries, and holidays. Some of us make lists of what we are doing with our time, and almost everyone has a digital calendar with the advent of the smartphone. We talk about how we fill our time, as if there is a vessel to be filled. The problem is we keep filling the vessel until it simply overflows and cannot hold anything else!We talk a lot about how we fill our time. In fact, it is common to ask, what does your schedule look like this week? Do you have time for ___? Can you squeeze in ___?Think about your calendar for a moment. I want you to visualize this for me. Each day has 24 hours that can be scheduled whether you use a paper or a digital calendar. Most mark the time in 30-minute increments. How much of your calendar is full or colored in? Family, work, social commitments, but what about God commitments? You have heard this before: if the devil can’t make you bad, he’ll make you busy. Attributed to Corrie ten Boom, this phrase sums up why I want to highlight our culture of busyness and how this inhibits us from showing God’s love.You and I are running quickly and filling our calendars with everything but God. And, if we are not filling our time seeking God’s presence, other things that can be bad more readily can creep in. How can we expect to experience God’s love or show others God’s love if we make no time for this?We will consider some of the ways our work culture creates more busyness—inhibiting us from showing God’s love if we don’t consciously make time to fill our moments, thinking about this most important command, to love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul and with all your mind (Matthew 22:37) and to love your neighbor as yourself (Matthew 22:39).
I’m sure there have been people in your life you thought, “I’d like to be like her—or like him.” You saw things in that person which were attractive and endearing, and you desired those qualities for yourself. Well, I want to encourage you to have that attitude toward a man named Joseph. His name was Joseph, but the apostles called him Barnabas, which means Son of Encouragement. You can read about him in Acts 4.Imagine people calling you by a name that signified you were an encouraging person. I can’t think of a greater compliment, can you? I want to show you how you can become a Barnabas in your workplace; you can be known as a person who encourages others. A good friend, Traci Mason, has compiled these ideas and allowed me to share them with you.We all recognize our workplaces can be full of discouragement, especially in these days of economic uncertainty. But this gives us a perfect opportunity to help others by becoming an encouraging person. Now, mind you, this will take some time and effort on your part, but the return on your investment will be eternal!So, here are some practical ways you can become a Barnabas where you work: Write notes. Handwritten notes are almost extinct. Keep a supply of note cards and encourage colleagues by placing a note on their desk, in their mailbox, or in their hand. It’s easy to make personalized cards on our computers now; so, get creative and write a note just to encourage someone. Send e-cards. It’s really easy to send an e-card to your coworkers to let them know you are thinking of them. You can even send the same card to multiple addresses. Employees receive messages that make requests and give instructions. They would surely welcome something more pleasant in their inbox, and an e-card would be a pleasant surprise. Remember birthdays. Find out the birthdates of coworkers, put them on your calendar, and simply give each coworker a birthday card to help them celebrate their special day. We send birthday cards here each month, and I’ve been amazed at how many people are encouraged to receive a special birthday card. It’s so easy to do! Smile! Did you realize a simple smile can cheer up and encourage someone? Smiles are contagious and can brighten the atmosphere where you work. When talking to or passing by others, just turn up the corners of your mouth and flash them a radiant smile. It costs you nothing, and it can really make a difference in someone’s day. Greet people! As you enter the workplace, greet coworkers with a simple, “Good morning.” You never know the energy it took for others to arrive at work. A pleasant greeting can start a person’s day off right and possibly help them forget about their troubles. Be the Welcome Committee. When a new employee joins the team, introduce yourself and offer to be of assistance. Help that person find his or her way around, offer to have lunch together. Think how comforting it could be for that new colleague, because being the new person can be challenging and a little frightening. Share your lunch. Purposely take more than you can eat for lunch and invite a coworker to eat with you. Or if you baked something special and have some leftovers, bring it in for others to enjoy. You could go the extra mile and ask them ahead of time to share lunch with you the next day.You may be thinking these don’t sound very impressive or important, but it is so often the little things we do can touch someone else. These things help them see they are not forgotten, and they are encouraged. Become an encourager on the job. It will make a difference.Here are some more creative ways you can be a Barnabas on the job: Offer to help your boss. That’s what I said—offer to help your boss. Instead of running from work or assignments, ask your boss what you can do today to help him or her, especially if you know your boss is under a lot of pressure. Bosses need help just like everybody else, yet often they are overlooked.
When was the last time you told someone, “I love you”? I hope it hasn’t been long since you expressed love to someone, and I hope it hasn’t been long since someone returned that expression of love to you. Love has the power to transform us, both as givers and receivers of love.I’m not speaking necessarily of romantic love, though of course that certainly can transform us, can’t it? Rather, just love in general—knowing that we are loved and being able to love others can change you, put a smile on your face, put a lift in your step, transform the mundaneness of life into something meaningful. All because we are loved and are loving.That’s why Paul wrote to the Corinthians that love never fails. What else in life can you say never fails? The best computer you can buy can and does fail. The best friend can fail you. The best job can fail to deliver what you need or want. God can never fail you, and God is love. Love never fails.It never fails to transform a person who is difficult, though it may take longer than you want. I remember when a friend of mine, Beth, worked for a very difficult manager. No one liked her; she was demanding, unfriendly, sour—just a miserable person. God used a verse—Proverbs 19:6—to tell Beth how to show love to this woman. That verse says, “Many curry favor with a ruler, and everyone is the friend of one who gives gifts.” She knew God wanted her to give this woman a gift on her birthday.She bought something small but thoughtful, wrote a note thanking her for pursuing excellence, and left it on her desk on her birthday. This simple act of love transformed that woman, and she and Beth became friends from that point on. With tears in her eyes, she said to Beth that no one had ever given her a birthday gift before. Because Beth was willing to obey God’s voice to show love to this woman, it transformed her, filling up a huge empty space inside of her and changing that relationship.Love is powerful. It never fails. I hope you will bask in the incredibly good news that God loves you and nothing can separate you from his love. And then you will become more and more intentional about loving others. It has the power to transform you, your relationships, your attitude, your productivity—love transforms us. Believe me, it’s true.
Why is it so important for us to be loved? We were created by God with this need to love and be loved. This need is at the core of your being, and if you don’t feel you are loved, it leaves a huge empty space in your sense of worth and value.The sad truth is if you grew up without feeling loved as you should have been, it can leave you emotionally needy, and that means you can’t love others as you should. You don’t have love to give, so to speak. This lack of love and loving then can lead to all kinds of emotional and mental problems, such as resentment, bitterness, a judgmental spirit, or depression. And then your lack of love from others begets more lack of love from you to others. It becomes a vicious cycle.This great need for love can lead you to look for love in all the wrong places, as the song goes, and put you on an endless quest for acquiring love, and that quest actually takes you further and further away from true, unconditional love. Can you relate to this? No doubt you know people who are on or have been on that futile quest for love.Here’s the incredibly good news: God’s love for you can fill up that emptiness inside, which then gives you the ability to love others, and then you’ll discover the love you give others comes back to you. We get love by giving it away, and we have love to give away because we know we are loved by Jesus.If you want to fill up your inner coffers with love, find some ways today to love others. Who is in your life today? How can you give them love? Here are some suggestions: Purpose in your heart to find something good about that person or people in your life today and express it in words to them. Listen to someone’s story without criticizing or lecturing them—even without giving advice. Call someone who is needy and say, “I’m here for you if you need me.” Compliment someone on a job well done, an attractive outfit, a kindness offered. Smile!It doesn’t take much to share love with someone else. We just have to remember to do it. Of course, we need to pray God will help us to become lovers—people who willingly and frequently share his love with others. Remember, love begets love. Try it! You won’t be sorry you did.
I’m examining how love transforms people—it truly does! Researchers tell us that loving and being loved actually changes our brains, our thought patterns, and our reactions.That’s what God’s love for us can do. It has the power to make us productive, grateful, kind, and generous toward everyone, even people who are not easy to love. For example, here’s one of the changes we will see in others as we become better and better at sharing God’s love with them: Love has the power to inspire someone to greatness.Do you know someone who is wasting their potential? Maybe they don’t even know they have potential, or perhaps they’re fearful of trying. I wonder—if they knew you see potential in them, if you loved them by encouraging them, could it empower them to reach their potential?Do you remember when Jesus called Simon as a disciple and gave him the name of Peter? He referred to Peter as a rock and said Peter would play a pivotal role in establishing the early church and spreading the gospel. Was Simon Peter a rock when Jesus called him? No, he had a long way to go before he reached “rock status,” but Jesus called him what he would become, and Peter became the rock of the early church.I have a dear friend who many years ago was bothered by a stutter. But I saw potential in her; she had the instincts of a performer, and I encouraged her to take small parts in a ministry at church that put her in front of people. She loved doing it, so she joined Toastmasters, where she learned to make presentations. Now she is very polished and gifted as a speaker and actor, and that stutter has been conquered. I just loved the potential I saw in her, and she has done what she never thought she could do as a result.Your love of encouragement could transform someone’s life. Don’t underestimate the transforming power of love.
Love transforms people. The Bible is full of stories of transformational love; we are admonished throughout Scripture to love as we have been loved by God. We know God not only loves, but he also is love. That’s his very nature, and we are created by this God to love and be loved.It is God’s love for us that transforms us, and then, it is our privilege and responsibility to share that love with others. Romans 5:5 tells us God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us. When we are born into God’s family through faith in Jesus Christ, the Holy Spirit comes to live in us, and he simply pours God’s love into our hearts. If others are going to know God’s love, they must experience his love through me and you as God’s love in us is shared with them.Is there someone in your life right now who is trouble for you? It could be a coworker or a boss, a child or a mate, a friend or foe. You know what they need? Love. I know—they’re probably not very lovable, but that doesn’t change the fact that they need love! What could you do today to show love to that person—undeserved, unconditional love? Maybe it’s a phone call or a note or a gift or a listening ear. Maybe it’s a lack of criticism and condemnation, a willingness to love them as they are in their unlovable condition.We often get so busy in our day-to-day lives we forget to stop and express love. Frankly, we’re always ready to receive love but not always prepared to give it. I find I must become intentional about expressing love; I have to remember to do it. I often take for granted the love I receive from others—my family and friends—without focusing on the love they need from me.Maybe you’re feeling very unloved. If you’re waiting to be loved before you give love, you’ve got the cart before the horse. It’s the principle of sowing and reaping—you reap what you sow. You need love? Then love someone else and love will come back to you. We can only receive love when we are intentional about giving love.Love is transformational—and we can become God’s agents of change to people in our lives by simply taking time each day to give love—and love can be given in many ways. Think of some new ways to share God’s love today; it will transform your day, I promise.
My question for you today is: What are the transformational points in your life? What person or situation or circumstance has made such a difference in your life that you can say, “That transformed me”?Transformed is a very strong word. It means a real change in our nature, character, or appearance. Something permanent, not temporary. If you think carefully about it, my guess is the transformational points in your life came because of love. Love has the power to transform us.For example, getting to know Jesus and accepting his gift of salvation certainly transforms our nature, doesn’t it? The Bible says we become new creations in Christ; the new has come, the old has gone. The love of God transforms us like no other love ever could.No wonder John 3:16 is the favorite verse in the Bible for many people.For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life (John 3:16).It’s because of that incredible love that we can have eternal life. I love the old hymn that begins “Loved with everlasting love, led by grace that love to know.” And then ends by declaring, “In a love that will not cease, I am his and he is mine.”Knowing I am the one Jesus loves has transformed me, how about you? I simply can’t get through that hymn without tears of joy just knowing how God—the God of all the universe—loves me. Love is transformational. There’s no doubt about it.Secular studies have repeatedly shown how love transforms people. They tell us knowing we are loved actually changes our brains. And of course, we know people who are not loved as children grow up with inner coffers that are horrifically empty. And this lack of love leads to all manner of other emotional and mental issues.Have you been transformed by the power of the love of Jesus? Have you accepted his free gift of salvation by confessing your sins and believing he is the Son of God who paid the price for your sin, because he loves you? If not, there is no doubt an empty space inside of you that is love-starved for Jesus, and I would urge you even today to simply confess your sins to him and accept the love he offers.
The Bible doesn’t tell us to like everyone, but we are commanded to love everyone. Here are just a few of the scriptures that make it clear:1 John 4:21: And he has given us this command: Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister.1 John 4:8: Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.Luke 6:32 & 35 Jesus said: Love your enemies. If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them.Leviticus 19:18: Love your neighbor as yourself.In fact, Jesus said there are two great and primary commandments (Matthew 22:37-40) and simply put, they are: Love God and love people. In fact, Jesus said all the commandments hang on these two; they are foundational to our faith. Easy to say, right? Love God, love people—but when you run into unlikable people, you feel like you've hit the spiritual brick wall. Since we cannot like them, we usually conclude we cannot love them either. Isn’t it true that we just naturally think you have to like someone before you can love them? Like is the first step, the beginning of love. So how can you love someone you don't like?Part of the problem is that love has different definitions, and we sometimes get them confused. In the Bible we find three types of love in the original language. The first is Philo, which is the love we have toward friends, family, and others in our lives. Philo love is what Paul describes in Romans 12:10: Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.Then there is Eros love, which is a more physical form of love. It’s the kind of love shared between a husband and wife, hopefully accompanied by Philo love as well.Then there is Agape love, which is the unconditional love God has for you and me. Nothing you do can change how God loves you. Ephesians 2:4-5 describe this Agape love:But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved.This is love which loves because its own inherent nature is to love. That's why the Bible says, God is love (1 John 4:8). Love is his nature.The kind of love we need to love people we don't like is agape love. Now, agape love is not necessarily a feeling. We can love with agape love whether the feelings are present or absent, whether they are good or bad, whether this love is reciprocated or not. It is not based on feelings.Agape love is an action. That’s how it's always described in Scripture. The Bible tells us we know God loves us because he sent his Son into the world to redeem us. We know Jesus loves us because he gave his life for us. The Bible says, Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends (John 15:13). And Jesus said that we know that we have come to know him if we keep his commands (1 Johnn 2:3).God's kind of love is an action, not a feeling. Now, that really is good news, because it means we can love people toward whom we do not necessarily have good feelings. You can love people toward whom you have no feelings at all. Since love is an action, you can obey God's command to love everyone.First Corinthians 13 is a good place to look for a practical description of love. A few of these are:Patience: When you act with patience toward someone, you are loving them. Keep in mind that love is not a feeling, so we don't have to feel patient. Can you remember acting with patience even when you did not feel patient? That is agape love.Kindness: When you feel like saying something sarcastic or cutting or angry, but instead you say something kind, that is a love action.Not Jealous: When you refuse to behave jealously or possessively, you are showing love.Has Good Manners: Just plain courtesy is a love action. How often we forget good manners, like not interrupting others when they're talking, letting others go ahead of us, etc.
Would you like to become known as a person of extraordinary love? It is possible for you and me to become really good at loving other people the way God wants us to. But it won’t just happen. We have to learn how to practice love in our everyday lives.My challenge to you is to truly focus on loving like Jesus loves. I am offering you a two-week plan to learn to practice love, which is based on the description of love found in 1 Corinthians 13. God’s love is an action, not a feeling, so we can learn to be a true lover as we learn to practice those attributes of love found in this wonderful chapter.This plan is available to you right now online at christianworkingwoman.org. It’s simple, easy, and doesn’t take much time. But it could be absolutely life-changing for you because as the famous chapter reminds us, love never fails. It never fails to transform us as we learn how to love better and better, and it transforms those to whom we extend God’s love.Our motivation and power for learning to practice love has to come from God’s love for us. John wrote:See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are (1 John 3:1)!In his Gospel, John identifies himself as “the one Jesus loves.” That was his identity, his motivation, his inspiration—Jesus loved him, and he lived in that love.As you and I live more and more in the truth that we are loved by the eternal God, that nothing can ever separate us from the love that is in Christ Jesus, and that God’s love for us will never change, the more we are capable of loving others. Then we will have the love of God to give to others, and we can truly practice love on a daily basis and become powerful transmitters of God’s love to our world.I hope you will join me and make loving God and loving people your primary focus. I believe my simple plan will help you, but however you do it, make love your life’s goal. Pray that you will be more and more rooted and grounded in love. Remember, that two-week plan is available now at christianworkingwoman.org.
If I asked you to define love, you might come up with an emotional description, because we typically think of love as it relates to our feelings. We have warm feelings for people we love, or our dogs, or any number of other things that we “love.” But the Bible’s definition of love as found in 1 Corinthians 13 is all about actions and attitudes, not about feelings.Did you know love is a skill you can learn? Like any other skill, the more you practice love, the better lover you become. In 1 Timothy 4, Paul exhorts Timothy to set an example for believers in the way he loves. And he says,Be diligent in these matters; give yourself wholly to them, so that everyone may see your progress (1 Timothy 4:15).I’ve come up with a two-week plan to learn to practice love, based on 1 Corinthians 13. This plan will help you to be diligent in learning to practice love, and believe me, your progress will be very evident.It’s an easy plan; it won’t take a lot of time. You just read 1 Corinthians 13 every day for the two weeks, and then you focus each day on one of the specific attributes of love found in that chapter. For example, on Day 6 the focus is on Verse 5, which says, love is not rude, it is not self-seeking. The challenge for that day is to practice very good manners. Just simple things, like remembering to say thank you, to let others go ahead of you, to open doors for others, to let other cars in your lane of traffic, to relinquish your seat to someone else.Love is not rude, but sometimes I can be careless in my attention to simple everyday manners, and that means I need to practice love by having better manners. And to do that, I must intentionally work at it. Now, the secret to success in learning to practice love is to pray these love actions into your life. On Day 6 pray that God would remind you to be aware of practicing good manners—to go out of your way to be polite. When you do, you’re practicing love.If you seriously started each day with a focus on becoming a better lover, by God’s standards, can you not see how it could truly make a difference in you? I urge you to join me; go to our website—christianworkingwoman.org—and print out the two-week plan or call us and we’ll mail it to you.
No doubt you know this one verse from the Bible that says God is love. But what does that mean? This verse in 1 John 4 goes on to say,Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him (1 John 4:16).Living in love—that’s my focus, and I’m challenging you to join me as we undertake a two-week plan to learn to live in love.Living in love takes practice. This plan suggests reading 1 Corinthians 13 every day for two weeks. It’s a short chapter—won’t take you long at all—but after two weeks of soaking truth into your mind, you will have a much clearer understanding of what living in love means.Then, on each of those 14 days, I suggest you focus on one specific attribute of love. For example, on Day 10 the focus is “looking for the good in others.” That’s because 1 Corinthians 13:6 says love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. That means you’re intentionally looking for the good in others instead of focusing on the things that irritate you.That could be someone you really don’t like, so you pray God will show you something about this person that is good. Or it could be your mate or someone close to you. Maybe you’ve been so focused on what you don’t like about them you’ve forgotten all the good things you do like. If you pray and sincerely look for the good in others, you will be practicing love—you will be loving like Jesus loves. How exciting is that?!God taught me this principle many years ago when I worked for a difficult man. All I saw was his bad points. Then I finally asked God to help me see him the way God saw him, and it changed me. I saw that he had outstanding business knowledge and acumen which I could learn from him, but until I intentionally prayed and looked for the good in him, I couldn’t see it at all.We just have to get serious and specific about living in love. I hope you’ll take my challenge to get my two-week plan on our website and join me in this adventure.
Do you practice love? My challenge to you is to make love your theme word for at least two short weeks. John wrote,Dear children, let us not love with words or speech, but with actions and in truth (1 John 3:18).To help you and me put love into action, I have put together a two-week plan to learn to practice love, based on the definition of love we find in 1 Corinthians 13. You’ll find this plan on our website—christianworkingwoman.org—or we’ll be glad to mail one to you. It’s just a method you can use to keep you focused on growing in love.For example, the plan includes reading 1 Corinthians 13 every day for two weeks and then focusing on one aspect of love each day. The first day’s focus is patience, because love is patient. But if you’re like me, patience does not come naturally for you. What can you do to learn to practice patience?Here’s my suggestion for Day 1: Think about who or what makes you impatient and then pray for that person or situation specifically. Perhaps it’s a person you work with who just really tries your patience, and because of that, you’ve had some harsh words or at least harsh attitudes and thoughts about that person. But have you ever prayed specifically that God would help you show patience to this person?When you do this, you begin to see that person the way God sees them, and you understand why they behave as they do. That, in turn, helps you be more patient with them as you look at them through God’s eyes. Praying specifically for a person or situation will unleash God’s power in you to learn to practice patience. And when you practice patience, you are practicing love! I promise—it works!
Everyone talks about love, so what in the world could I say about love that hasn’t already been said thousands of time and much more eloquently? I find talking about love is pretty easy, but putting it into practice can be quite challenging.Love is such an abused word that it almost becomes meaningless in today’s culture. But when we understand the Bible’s definition of love, it becomes quite a challenge. If you and I are going to be the kind of lovers the Bible says we should be, we’ll need some help in knowing how to practice love. That’s my goal.I’ve prepared a two-week plan to help you and me learn to practice love by the Bible’s definition. The truth is, if you’re not intentional about putting God’s principles into practice, they just remain words on the pages of your Bible. They don’t become transformational in your life. That’s why I often use specific plans, in writing, to keep me on track and help me do what I really want to do.This two-week plan is based on 1 Corinthians 13, which gives us very explicit and practical instruction on just what it means to love. It has very little to do with our emotions, but it has everything to do with our attitudes and our actions. This plan will help you focus on one thing at a time—one characteristic of real love each day—and give you ideas on how to implement them in your life.The Apostle Paul prayed for the believers in Ephesus that they would be “rooted and established in love.” In John 13, Jesus says to his disciples,A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another (John 13:34-35).I think it’s so interesting Jesus says this is a new command; loving one another wasn’t required under the Law but under the New Covenant, under grace, we have a new commandment, and it is to love as we have been loved by Jesus.I invite you to join me in this two-week plan to practice love. It’s important we take this love thing seriously, and if you will join me in learning to practice love, I think it will be transformational for you and me.
I want to begin by saying that God has put each of us who are Christ-followers in this time, in this place in history, as we read in Esther, “for such a time as this.” So, we must first see this as an opportunity, privilege, and blessing to be part of God’s plan for this time. It’s no accident that we are living in this culture.Now, here’s my first suggestion for sharing the gospel with people who don’t care: Share your life. If anyone is going to be open to the gospel, it will be because they sense we are real people and we really care about them.Don’t you hate those cold calls you get trying to sell you something? Usually, they try to sound so friendly and make you think they really care about you personally when they’re selling a new cable system or whatever. But no matter how slick their presentation may be, you know they don’t know you and they don’t really care about you. They’re just trying to make a sale.If we come off that way when we talk about our faith in Jesus Christ, it simply won’t work. In reaching the people in Thessalonica, the Apostle Paul wrote that: we dared to tell you this gospel in spite of strong opposition. For the appeal we make does not spring from error or impure motives, nor are we trying to trick you (1 Thessalonians 2:2-3). He was facing very similar circumstances there as we do here, and he made it known that he was sharing the gospel with them because he cared for them. His motivation was transparent and pure. There was no hidden agenda with him.He further wrote: We loved you so much that we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well, because you had become so dear to us (1 Thessalonians 2:8). When people believe we are sharing our faith in Jesus Christ with them because they are dear to us and that we are sharing not only our faith, but our lives with them, then there’s hope that they will begin to believe the gospel is relevant, real, and worthy of consideration.So, if there are some people in your life right now who just simply don’t seem to care about things of God, about hearing the truth of the gospel, don’t be discouraged and don’t give up. Share your life with them and let them know you care about them personally. That is a big step one in sharing the gospel with people who don’t care.Here’s another suggestion that can be powerful—tell stories. I never cease to be amazed at the power of storytelling. Jesus used parables almost exclusively in his short ministry on earth. That should give us the first clue that storytelling is an effective way of sharing truth because you and I will listen to a story, give it our full attention, and remember it better than anything else. Stories stick with you.Stories from the Bible are, of course, very powerful, so the more familiar you are with the stories of Scripture, the more you can tell them to others. For example, suppose you have a friend who is grieving over a wayward son or daughter. You could at an appropriate time tell them the story of the prodigal son (Luke 15:11-32) and encourage them to believe that there is hope for their child, too. Or if you’re in a discussion about social issues, helping the poor, homeless people, or something similar, you could tell the story of the Good Samaritan (Luke 10:25-37). You don’t have to read from the Bible; just tell the stories of the Bible in your own words.I think of a friend, Kate, who spent five years in Afghanistan in a culture totally opposed to the gospel. She was very effective at sharing the gospel in that environment. Besides loving the people and caring about them, she also found that telling the stories of the Bible was the best way possible to share truth with them. Time and again God opened a door for her to share a Bible story. The women listened and learned, and many came to saving faith.Keep in mind it is not your job to win people to Christ. Only the Holy Spirit can do that.
Presented by Lauren StibgenAs women at work, we are still faced with many challenges despite all the progress that has been made. More than ever, women have excelled and held leadership positions. Pay equity has improved but surely isn’t perfect, and there is still bias in the workplace as seen in how people respond to men presenting an idea versus women. What does this have to do with being an ambassador? Well, if self doubt creeps in, your role as an ambassador can feel diminished or difficult. But we would be remiss if we didn’t look to an amazing example in the Bible of how the women who followed Jesus were walking counter culturally for their time.After this, Jesus traveled about from one town and village to another, proclaiming the good news of the kingdom of God. The Twelve were with him, and also some women who had been cured of evil spirits and diseases: Mary (called Magdalene) from whom seven demons had come out; Joanna the wife of Chuza, the manager of Herod’s household; Susanna; and many others. These women were helping to support them out of their own means (Luke 8:1-3).Again, we see women with imperfect past lives were following Jesus and providing for the ministry!What is significant about this? Mary Magdalene.In John 20:11-18 we find Mary at the tomb looking for the body of Jesus. He appears to her first as the resurrected Christ and tells her,“Do not hold on to me, for I have not yet ascended to the Father. Go instead to my brothers and tell them, ‘I am ascending to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God.’” Mary Magdalene went to the disciples with the news: “I have seen the Lord!” And she told them that he had said these things to her (John 20:17-18)In Mark 16:11, we learn that when they heard that Jesus was alive and that she had seen him, they did not believe it.This did not stop her from serving as an ambassador to Jesus in the resurrection! She boldly went to them and proclaimed he had risen.To me, Mary is an encouragement. Despite her likely knowing she would not be taken seriously, she still did as Jesus commanded her.How can you follow Jesus’ command today even if you are feeling self-doubt? Surely, he will equip you for every good work!
Presented by Lauren StibgenHow will God use me as an ambassador? I have such a terrible past and I really don’t know how he will ever use me! How often do thoughts of your past life as a citizen of this world creep into your mind? Are you overcome with thinking God cannot use you as an ambassador for Jesus at work?I hope you are a regular reader of the Bible and abiding in this way! If not, I want to take this moment to encourage you to pick up a Bible reading plan because this is the best way to see how God can redeem and use anyone for his glory! Even if you are not in the Word daily, you surely have heard of the apostle Paul. In fact, Paul was used by God to write the most books in the Bible!What do you know about Paul? What I can tell you is he was one of the most ardent adversaries of the followers of Jesus Christ. In fact, many of the followers at that time were met in persecution and even execution for their faith under the direction of Paul who was, at the time, named Saul.But Saul began to destroy the church. Going from house to house, he dragged off both men and women and put them in prison (Acts 8:3).He speaks of his life contrary to following Jesus in Acts 26:9-11.But God changed Saul in an instant and redeemed him to be one of his greatest ambassadors! Saul is renamed Paul. You can read about this in Acts 9:1-19.Was this you? Were you walking in a way contrary to leading people to faith in Jesus? Maybe you were making fun of the Christian lifestyle, but now you whole heartedly follow Jesus.Paul went to prison for his belief in Jesus. He worshiped in prison. He wrote letters (the Epistles) to tell the early church to repent and follow the ways of Christ. Paul was beaten for his faith. All of this was after an entire life persecuting the church!Paul was able to use his past life to be a testimony of the huge change Jesus made in his life. Have you prepared to share your testimony? Sometimes sharing your testimony can be one of the most powerful ways Jesus uses you as his ambassador.
Presented by Lauren StibgenWe know we are to renew our minds daily! How can we focus on being ambassadors of Jesus? What happens when we are overcome and fail to be the best representatives of Jesus? Let’s look at two examples of this. One ends in despair, and the other ends with beautiful redemption and an even deeper commitment to being an ambassador for Jesus.Temptation is around every corner in this world. It was back in the time of Jesus, and it is today. We got a sneak peek into the heart of Judas yesterday with his rebuke of Mary in the anointing of Jesus feet. We also know Judas betrayed Jesus.In Matthew 26:14-16 we see Judas’s greed take over.Then one of the Twelve—the one called Judas Iscariot—went to the chief priests and asked, “What are you willing to give me if I deliver him over to you?” So they counted out for him thirty pieces of silver. From then on Judas watched for an opportunity to hand him over (Matthew 26:14-16).In the end, after Jesus’ death, we know Judas is grieved and tries to return the money! When he cannot, he ends up taking his own life. He had betrayed Jesus!But we also see the other side of this in the story of Peter’s denial in Luke 22:54-62. Not only did Jesus predict Peter would deny knowing him, we see how grieved Peter is when he realizes this! The rooster crows three times, Peter sees the Lord, remembers the Lord’s words, and weeps bitterly.Peter’s heart was grieved. One can consider he had a repentant heart. When Peter meets the resurrected Jesus on the shores, we see Jesus question him in John 21:17. Do you love me? He does this three times. And then Jesus commands him to feed my sheep.Your role as an ambassador will not be easy. Temptations will come and sometimes it will be easier to deny Jesus than it will be to boldly speak of your faith. If you do end up like Judas (hopefully not) or Peter, your repentance and return to Jesus are critical to your future kingdom work as an ambassador for Jesus! Jesus sees your heart; he knows and feels your repentance.
Presented by Lauren StibgenOne of the ways we can show up as ambassadors for Jesus at work is in the sacrifices we make for others. This can show up in different ways. Maybe it is a financial sacrifice or perhaps it is the sacrifice of time or even placing yourself aside to shine the light on someone other than yourself. All of this can feel costly! And most of the actions we will take as ambassadors of Jesus in this world will be counter to what the culture of this world tells us we should do.In John 12:1-8, we see a costly and counter sacrifice.Six days before the Passover, Jesus came to Bethany, where Lazarus lived, whom Jesus had raised from the dead. Here a dinner was given in Jesus’ honor. Martha served, while Lazarus was among those reclining at the table with him. Then Mary took about a pint of pure nard, an expensive perfume; she poured it on Jesus’ feet and wiped his feet with her hair. And the house was filled with the fragrance of the perfume. But one of his disciples, Judas Iscariot, who was later to betray him, objected, “Why wasn’t this perfume sold and the money given to the poor? It was worth a year’s wages.” He did not say this because he cared about the poor but because he was a thief; as keeper of the money bag, he used to help himself to what was put into it (John 12:1-6).In the remaining verses we see Jesus rebuke Judas and tell him to leave her alone for he would not always be with them.In this time, her sacrifice was costly. What about today? If you are a leader with a budget and times are tight with the company, how will this impact pay increases and rewards for your people? Would you be willing to forgo an increase, so your team can be properly rewarded for their hard work? This would be counter to what culture tells you to do.Perhaps your team had a big win for the company. In a meeting, the CEO praises you very specifically for this win. Rather than accepting all this praise, how are you shining the light back to the contributions of your team?Perhaps it is as simple as time, which also can be costly. Are you seeing a colleague struggle with a project? Perhaps you offer to help them.Maybe the cost is defending your faith at work. In a way, we see Mary representing her faith in Jesus with the costly sacrifice of this anointing. She did what was counter to the culture. Is someone making fun of people who believe in Jesus? It may feel costly to speak up, but it is one way you can be an ambassador for the kingdom you serve.
Presented by Lauren StibgenIf you have followed our ministry over the years, you know the word ambassador is part of our purpose. More specifically, the purpose of The Christian Working Woman is to encourage, equip and empower Christians in the workplace to love Christ more, to live their daily lives by biblical principles, and to go to their jobs as ambassadors for Jesus Christ.To me, the title of ambassador feels important—high ranking, a leader. Ambassadors represent their country to foreign delegations. We are ambassadors of a heavenly delegation!In John 17:16 Jesus states, “They are not of this world, just as I am not of it.” Underscoring this delegation we have here in the world.The word ambassador comes from a Latin word ambactus, which means servant. Although ambassadors are diplomats and representatives to a foreign country—in our case, a heavenly country—being an ambassador truly means we are here to serve others for Jesus Christ.Are you a willing servant for Jesus at work? And are you keeping your citizenship top of mind as you walk in the workplace each day? This world is loud. The busyness and activity in our days often overshadows our citizenship and can cloud our very best efforts to be ambassadors for Jesus at work!Romans 12:2 holds a bold reminder for this reason.Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will (Romans 12:2).How are you starting your days? Do you pause to think about how you are being transformed in your faith? Do you stop to seek God’s will for your day? How can you seek what is good, acceptable, and perfect for your day?Don’t let the world overcome you! Be mindful and on watch to prepare to be the best ambassador or servant you can be.
Jesus promised us many good things, but he also warned of the sacrifice we would face as his followers and more importantly in our work as his ambassadors. As we consider how we represent Jesus as ambassadors in the workplace, we really need to consider what Jesus says about the reality of this role and take counsel from how some of the best ambassadors in the Bible handled this.In John 15:18-20a Jesus told his disciples:“If the world hates you, know that it has hated me before it hated you. If you were of the world, the world would love you as its own; but because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you. Remember the word that I said to you: ‘A servant is not greater than his master.’ If they persecuted me, they will also persecute you.”The word ambassador comes from the Latin root of ambacus, meaning servant. The servant or ambassador in these verses from John is not greater than his master. If your master is Jesus, you can count on all the hatred and persecution that he experienced. But how might this hatred or persecution show up for us as we represent Christ at work by serving others?First, let’s really think about why we are persecuted in this world—at work or in general. We are in a foreign country, ruled by the prince of the power of the air, not in the heavenly realms. More specifically, we can count on the devil trying to thwart our good efforts to serve God's Kingdom!1 Peter 5:8 states: Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.We must be watchful and aware that this can happen at any time, and when we are feeling discouraged in our serving, we need to consider this verse.We have all faced this, especially when we are sharing our faith with someone at work. The enemy wants to sow the seeds of self-doubt to thwart our efforts!You have been there. People notice you are different. Maybe you are positive when it seems like you shouldn’t be. Perhaps it is how you lead and provide feedback to your team. Are you more uplifting than anyone in your office—always looking to be a mighty encourager, and coach? Are you offering help? Maybe you have even bought a coffee for someone who was having a bad day.As ambassadors we show our faith by saying no to certain things that others engage in at work. Whether it is gossip or not attending a happy hour that seems to happen often, you may feel like you don’t fit in with your colleagues. Rest assured your absence from both gossip and even a wild happy hour honors the Lord, and you are being his servant at work by not engaging.Are you showing up and reporting something that needs to be brought to light? Maybe it is a simple compliance issue, or it could be something more egregious like theft. This is being Christ’s ambassador.All these actions are your faith at work 1.0—ways to be an ambassador without even telling people about your faith.But what if someone calls you out for sitting out? How will you answer? It is easy to walk away from gossip and to reply no to an outing, but what if someone asks why? What happens if someone gets upset when you report the wrongdoing?Or what about when someone inserts a small comment, “Gosh you are so different than everyone else here,” Or “Why are you so positive all the time?” They simply want to know about your joy!1 Peter 3:13-17 outlines the expectation of our reply!Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. “Do not fear their threats; do not be frightened.” But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander.
Fran has to deal with a coworker who often is profane and obscene. In a meeting he makes a point of using the Lord's name in vain and then sarcastically apologizes to Fran for hurting her feelings. Jesus helps Fran to respond."Actually, Bud, you didn't hurt my feelings; you hurt my heart," Fran answers.Suddenly the whole room gets quiet, and everyone is watching Bud and Fran. Nobody is really fond of Bud's vile language, but he's been in the company for years. So, no one confronts him, not even upper management.Bud gives a nervous laugh. "Hurt your heart? What do you mean, Fran?""Well, I just mean when you use the name of Jesus like that, it really hurts me because he's the most important person in my life. He's my best friend. How would you like it if I used the name of your best friend—or someone close to you—in a derogatory way? I think it would hurt your heart, Bud, just like you hurt mine," Fran says. She thinks, Lord, were those words from you? I never planned to say that!"Oh, Fran, you take things too personally. That's just the way people talk," Bud replies, obviously unnerved by Fran's response. The air is full of electricity.Jesus nudges Fran, “It's time to get this conversation out of this public arena. Invite him to lunch.”“Invite him to lunch, Lord? Bud? I don't want to have lunch with him—and besides he would never accept,” Fran replies, but Jesus is insistent. Invite him to lunch, Fran.When Jesus tugs at her like that, she knows she has to obey, so Fran turns to Bud, "You know, Bud, this would make for an interesting conversation over lunch today. How about it—my treat?""You're inviting me to lunch? You think you can endure me that long, Fran?" Bud asks with a big laugh."I'm sure of it—if you think you can put up with me that long," Fran answers with a laugh."Okay, you got a deal. I never turn down a free lunch," Bud replies.All through the meeting Fran communicates to Jesus about this upcoming lunch with Bud. “Lord, what am I'm going to say to Bud?”“You're going to become friends with Bud, Fran, and let him see what I'm like, living in you. How can you ever do that if you never get to know him?” Jesus explains to Fran.“Well, okay, but it's probably wasted effort. Bud's a hopeless case,” Fran thinks.“Oh, Fran, many times the people who look the least likely to want to know me are the ones most hungry. You may be surprised,” Jesus informs her.Fran is learning that witnessing begins with loving people, spending time with them, getting to know them—even the people who seem to be the least likely candidates.
If you've been reading all week, you've read the continuing story of Fran, who gave up a free night to listen to a neighbor talk about her broken relationship. The next morning as she talks with Jesus early in her day, she says, "You know, Lord, I had hoped I could tell Sue about you last night. She really needs you, Lord, but I don't know—she didn't seem to want to listen. She just wanted to talk about Ed.""Fran, you're sowing seeds. You did the right thing to listen to Sue. You showed her love, and that's what she needed last night," Jesus assures Fran."Yes, but I don't want her to think I approve of her relationship with Ed. She was living in sin, and it's a good thing he left, you know?" Fran responds."Yes, I know, but listening to someone's hurts doesn't mean you approve of their lifestyle. Don't worry, Sue knows how you feel about her relationship. Last night she needed to know that you cared and loved her unconditionally," Jesus replies."Okay, but I hope someday to be able to lead her to know you, Jesus.""Yes, well, you certainly earned your right last night, Fran, so keep praying for her," Jesus says. And after a few more minutes in prayer, Fran gets her day going, a little weary, but feeling good about her evening with Sue.As she arrives at the office, Fran remembers there's a department meeting this morning. "Oops, better get into that meeting before I'm late," she says, and hurries to the conference room.It seems the only chair available is right next to Bud, head of operations. Fran is not terribly fond of Bud. He's crude, to put it mildly, and uses profanity a lot, not to mention dirty jokes when he has a chance."Oh, Fran, don't tell me you're going to sit next to me," Bud says as she sits down. "Be careful, you might catch something.” Bud always tries to get to Fran, and it seems as soon as she gets near, his language gets worse.She tries to ignore his comment, but he immediately uses the Lord's name in a blasphemous way. Fran winches at his words. "Oh, 'scuse me, Fran, I forgot you're a Jesus freak, didn't mean to hurt your feelings," Bud says, with obvious sarcasm.Lord, Fran whispers to Jesus, am I supposed to just sit here and let Bud get by with this profane use of your name?“Stay calm,” Jesus replies. “I'll tell you what to say.”
Fran has run into a neighbor who needs a friend, and although Fran had planned a quiet evening for herself, at Jesus' prodding, she gives Sue a call."Hi, Sue, this is Fran. Listen, I don't have anything I have to do tonight. Why don't you come on over in a little while. The kids go to bed around 8:30 or 9:00. We'll have some time then to talk. I've got good ears, Sue, and I'm willing to listen," Fran invites Sue over."Yeah, I'm sure; see you later,” Sue responds.As she hangs up the phone, Fran smiles. "You know, Lord, I didn't really plan to do that, but when I started thinking about Sue and how I'd feel if I were in her shoes, well..." Fran's voice trails off."Yes, Fran, you just put on compassion. You have prayed that I would help you to be a compassionate person, so I just answered that prayer," Jesus tells her. "When you care about someone, when you feel compassion toward them, it's not so difficult to be a servant to them, is it?""Oh, I didn't think of it as being a servant; I just wanted to help her. I hope I can," Fran replies."True servanthood," he says, "is when you are a servant and don't even realize it. And that happened, Fran, as soon as you stopped thinking about how inconvenient it was and how you had a right to have a night all your own. Instead, you thought about Sue.""I get the picture, Lord," Fran replies. "Keep praying for compassion, keep putting myself in other's shoes, and day by day, you will answer my prayer and make me more like you—compassionate. It really is amazing to see how you can change me,” Fran says.She helps the kids with their homework, and as they're getting ready for bed, Sue knocks on the door. It turns out to be a late night for Fran, as Sue talks for several hours and pours out her hurt and pain from her broken relationship.Fran falls in bed about midnight, exhausted, praying for Sue as she goes to sleep.Jesus reminds her Sue is desperate for love. She doesn't know his love, so she's looking for it in a man. That happens a lot, doesn’t it? She and Jesus talk a bit about Sue's dilemma, and before she knows it, Fran has reached for the phone and dialed Sue's number.Fran continues with Sue: "I'm sure this has been very hurtful for you, Sue. Sorry. I didn't know.""Well, maybe I could talk with you sometime when you have time. I know how busy you are..." Sue looks at Fran with hopeful eyes."Of course, we'll get together soon, I promise," Fran replies, and with that they each head for the check-out stand.
Have you ever wondered how you can befriend a non-believer whose lifestyle is sinful, without appearing to approve of the sin? Fran is facing that dilemma. On the way home from work, she runs into a neighbor, Sue, who tells Fran that her live-in boyfriend has just moved out. Sue is obviously upset and wants to talk, and Fran promises to call her soon.In the check-out line, Jesus says to Fran, "You know, Sue is really needing a friend right now, Fran. Why didn't you invite her to come over tonight and talk?""Tonight? Well, Lord, you know this is the first night in two weeks I've had to myself. I just want to be alone and read after the kids go to bed," Fran replies, sounding a bit defensive."Yeah, I understand, Fran, but can you afford to pass up an opportunity like this to reach out to someone who was obviously asking you to help her?" Jesus asks."Well, I'll call her and set up a date next week for pizza or something," Fran answers, hoping that will satisfy Jesus."Next week?" he replies. "Next week is a long time off when you're hurting like Sue is."As she heads for the car, Jesus doesn't say anything else, but Fran is very uncomfortable. She pulls into her driveway, and says, "Lord, you really think I should give up my one free night and ask Sue over tonight? I mean, don't I have a right to one night to myself?""A right? Well, think about that, Fran,” Jesus says. “I gave up my rights to all that was coming to me when I left heaven to come to earth. The essence of the Christian life is that we give our rights over to God and allow him to run things for us. You remember I said, 'Not my will, but thine be done.'"Fran remembers in a flash all she has been learning about giving up her rights and being a servant. But when the rubber hits the road, as it has this evening, she finds it a bit difficult. "Guess I really don't like being a servant sometimes, Lord," Fran replies, as she sits in the car a few more minutes. "It's not always convenient, is it," Fran says with a smile."No, sometimes it's terribly inconvenient and requires sacrifice. But the rewards are good, Fran," Jesus reminds her.As she makes dinner for the kids, her mind again goes to Sue. She thinks Sue must be devastated. Ed was her whole life, and now he's gone. Fran knew he would never marry her, but Sue thought for sure if they just lived together for a few months, then he'd want to get married.Jesus reminds her Sue is desperate for love. She doesn't know his love, so she's looking for it in a man. That happens a lot, doesn’t it? She and Jesus talk a bit about Sue's dilemma, and before she knows it, Fran has reached for the phone and dialed Sue's number.Fran continues with Sue: "I'm sure this has been very hurtful for you, Sue. Sorry. I didn't know.""Well, maybe I could talk with you sometime when you have time. I know how busy you are..." Sue looks at Fran with hopeful eyes."Of course, we'll get together soon, I promise," Fran replies, and with that they each head for the check-out stand.
Knowing how to witness to others is often a perplexing question for many of us. Our friend Fran is facing that issue. This on-going story of Fran and Jesus is told as though Jesus was with her all day, and she talks to him and he to her. Of course, Jesus is with us all the time, but sometimes we forget. Hopefully, these stories of Fran and Jesus will help us remember to practice the presence of Jesus everyday everywhere.Fran is hurrying home from work. "It seems like I always have to stop at the store for something," Fran thinks. "You know, Lord, if I didn't have to buy groceries, I'd be rich," she muses. “But with a growing nine-year-old boy, he just seems to never get enough. I'm thankful you told us not to worry about what we eat or wear, because you know we have need of these things," Fran says to Jesus. She is reassured by the promise Jesus will never leave her or forsake and has indeed promised to supply all her needs according to his riches in glory.She pulls into the grocery parking lot and dashes into the store, practically running through the aisles to find the things she needs. In the midst of her hurry, she hears a voice, "Hey, Fran!” She turns and sees her neighbor."Sue, hi. How are you? Goodness, I haven't seen you in several weeks. Good to see you," Fran says in a friendly way."Yeah, I've been thinking about calling and stopping in to talk, but—well, I know how busy you are with the kids and everything," Sue says."How about your job, Sue? Did you get that new job you were hoping for?" Fran asks."No, I decided not to even apply for it, Fran," Sue answers. "I'm sure I didn't have a chance, and besides. . ." her voice trails off, and Fran can tell something is wrong."What's wrong, Sue? You look a little upset," Fran encourages her to talk.Sue looks around, uncomfortable talking in the middle of the store. "Well, Ed moved out a couple of weeks ago, and I've just been upset, I guess.""Oh, I see," Fran replies. "I'm, well I'm...” What can I say, Lord? Fran asks Jesus. I'm not sorry Ed moved out; they shouldn't have been living together anyway.“Just show her some love, Fran,” Jesus responds. “You can show love for people even if you don't approve of what they're doing.”Fran continues with Sue: "I'm sure this has been very hurtful for you, Sue. Sorry. I didn't know.""Well, maybe I could talk with you sometime when you have time. I know how busy you are..." Sue looks at Fran with hopeful eyes."Of course, we'll get together soon, I promise," Fran replies, and with that they each head for the check-out stand.
My friend Judy was a missionary living in Nairobi, Kenya. She traveled a good deal in and around Nairobi, and if you’ve ever been there, you know it’s pretty much a continual traffic jam. And there are always people lined up on the streets selling everything you can imagine—including to my horror, puppies.One day Judy was traveling with her driver, Baraza, and she saw a woman selling bananas, with a baby strapped to her back and two others playing at her feet. Judy told Baraza, “Pull over; I want to buy some bananas.” She gave him the equivalent of about two dollars and told him to buy all her bananas—about 20. “But Sister,” he said, “why are you buying 20 bananas? You can’t eat that many.” “Just buy them,” she told him.He was baffled as to why Judy would want so many bananas, since she lives alone, but he did as she insisted. When he paid the lady for all her bananas, her face lit up with a huge, incredulous smile. That probably represented two days of food for her and her family. Baraza said, “Sister, did you see how happy she was. You did a good thing for her.”Then they traveled on, and Judy saw a crippled man with only one leg by the side of the road. She told Baraza to stop and give him some bananas. Once again, Baraza saw how thrilled the man was to get the bananas. This went on for their entire journey until Judy had given away all the bananas. Baraza—who is a wonderful believer—said, “Sister, this was so good. I can do this. I can give away bananas.” And as a result, Baraza began to carry bananas, apples, and other fruit with him to give to people randomly as God led him. So, he had a banana ministry.What do you have in your hands that could easily become gifts of love to the people in your life—strangers, coworkers, family, friends—whoever? I’m suggesting that every one of us should look for our banana ministry—something we intentionally do to share the love of God.You’re probably familiar with the phrase “random acts of kindness.” Actually, it has become a movement, encouraging people to purposely plan and perform kind acts for others. Lots of research has been done that shows the incredible benefits for the person who decides to plan and execute random acts of kindness. According to research from Emory University, when you are kind to another person, your brain’s pleasure and reward centers light up, as if you were the recipient of the good deed—not the giver. This phenomenon is called the “helper’s high.”Isn’t it interesting that when people follow the principles of Scripture, whether they are believers or not, they discover it benefits everyone. The Apostle Paul wrote to Timothy: And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but must be kind to everyone. . . (2 Timothy 2:24). And to the church in Colossae he wrote: Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience (Colossians 3:12). He was preaching “random acts of kindness” long before the term was coined.Certainly, as followers of Jesus Christ, we should share “random acts of kindness” more than any others because we have the Holy Spirit, and we also have the great privilege of showing God’s love to a loveless, often cruel world. And then, as the studies show, we discover what Jesus told us—it is truly more blessed to give than to receive.Let me tell you about my friend, Kiyoko, a Japanese woman in my church. She was inspired to use her creativity to share the gospel. So, she made beautiful little bookmarks with a Bible verses, using things people throw away, like candy wrappers.She carried her bookmarks with her and whenever she had an opportunity—with a stranger, a store clerk, someone she sat by on the bus or airplane—she gave them one of her bookmarks. She called them “born-again bookmarks,” and explained how she makes them from scraps of paper that people throw away. This opened the door for her to tell them that her born-again boo...
Are you a risk taker? Jesus asks us to take risks for him. He challenges us to lose our lives for the sake of the Gospel. He warned us our lives might incur hard times and persecutions, just as his did. But you can be sure of this: It is better to lose your life than it is to waste it.Let me quote from John Piper’s booklet, Risk Is Right:“Therefore, it is right to risk for the cause of Christ. It is right to engage the enemy and say, ‘May the Lord do what seems good to him.’ It is right to serve the people of God, and say, ‘If I perish, I perish!’ It is right to stand before the fiery furnace of affliction and refuse to bow down to the gods of the world. At the end of every other road—secure and risk-free—we will put our face in our hands and say, ‘I’ve wasted it!’ But at the end of the road of risk, taken in reliance on the blood-bought promises of God, there will be fullness of joy and pleasures forevermore.”The kind of risk-taking we should do for Jesus is not the impulse of being a hero, or the lust for adventure. If our motives are to heap praise and glory for ourselves, we are doing it for the wrong reasons. And we don’t take risks for Jesus to earn his acceptance or gain his approval. It has to be about doing it for the love of Christ—nothing more, nothing less.For Christ’s love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died. And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again (2 Corinthians 5:14-15).When the love of Christ compels you, then the risk is a no-brainer. You just have to do it because Jesus loves you so much, and he has redeemed your life and given you hope and purpose. And now you have the privilege to do something risky out of love for him.Regardless of what God is leading you to do, I can promise you it will be bigger than you are, and it will be risky. It will require you to live by faith and not by sight. It will test you and frighten you, but that’s where the blessing is, where the abundant life is. Don’t miss it. If God is for you, who can be against you?
Do you know someone who has taken a big risk for Jesus? We’ve looked at two women in Scripture who took great risks—Esther and Deborah. But what about a contemporary risk-taker?Let me tell you about my dear friend, Donnita Travis, who left her very successful career in marketing to begin an after-school ministry for under-served children in the poorest neighborhoods of Chicago. In 2001 she began with 16 children, coming three days each week to our church for tutoring, teaching, and nourishing. Now there are over 1,200 children involved in By the Hand Club in four different locations in our city, and it is absolutely mind-boggling to see how God is using this ministry to bring children hope and love and help them reach their potential. These children not only improve in their schoolwork, but they also hear the gospel clearly and are loved by the staff. The success stories are abundant. You can learn the whole story by going to bythehand.org.I look at Donnita and think, if only I had faith like she does, or if only I had her management and marketing skills. And of course, she is uniquely gifted. But it’s much more than that. Donnita heard God’s call on her life, and she simply said, like Esther, “God has put me here for such a time as this.” She took enormous risks and for over twenty-five years has boldly moved forward with ever-growing impact on our city.But let me tell you one more thing: It’s been loads of hard work, long days, many serious safety and legal issues to resolve. It’s not an easy road. There are days I see her and know she is simply tired to the bone. But she keeps doing what God has put her here to do, and God is blessing.I know God doesn’t call all of us to such highly visible tasks, but I know he calls each of us to step out on faith, take a risk, and be willing to let him do through us what he alone can do. Are you standing on the brink of a new challenge? Does your heart tell you this is what God wants you to do?The one who calls you is faithful and he will do it (1 Thessalonians 5:24).Don’t miss the great thing God has for you to do because you’re not willing to take the risk.
Do you know the story of Deborah, who was a judge in Israel? Deborah was a risk-taker for the Lord.This woman was way ahead of her time. She had to take an enormous risk—and that was to go herself and lead her army into battle. Barak was the leader of the army, but he said, “If you go with me, I will go; but if you don’t go with me, I won’t go.” Maybe he thought she never would agree to go into battle and that would get him off the hook. If so, she fooled him. She said, “Very well, I will go with you. But because of the way you are going about this, the honor will not be yours…” Obviously she recognized he was not the brave leader he should be. So, she took a risk. You can read her story in Judges 4—an amazing story of how God gave her and her army victory over their much larger enemy.I wonder what it is that makes one person willing to take a risk for God and another is not. Isn’t it true we are prone to trust those we know, but if we don’t know someone too well, we’re less willing to trust them? No doubt our trust in God has a lot to do with our willingness to take a risk for him. It’s at these times—when there is some risk involved—that we find out just whether we trust God or not—or how much we trust him. God wants us to take risks as he leads us and allow him to do through us what we could never do on our own. We should attempt something so great for God that only he could do it.You provide a broad path for my feet, so that my ankles do not give way (Psalm 18:36).Ron Hutchcraft tells the story of how he had to overcome a fear of walking across a slippery pipe to cross a stream so he could see an incredible waterfall. He was afraid to do it and was ready to back out, but his friends encouraged him to walk across the pipe so he could see this beautiful waterfall. He finally took the risk and made it across. And he reports the risk was more than worth it because the view was awesome. When we start across a pipe that looks risky, that "faith pipe" that will take us to new territory for Jesus, the pipe becomes a broad path, and our ankles don't turn! Jesus broadens the path beneath our feet. I love that image.Walk across the pipe today. Don't miss the view. Don't miss what Jesus wants to do in you and through you. Don't stay where it's comfortable. Be willing to be an entrepreneur for Jesus. That’s where the abundant life is—doing what only he can do through you.
Be a risk-taker! The Bible is full of stories of risk-takers. Esther took a great risk to rescue her people from annihilation. This young, inexperienced woman literally took her life in her hands and approached the king. Before doing that, she asked all the Jews to pray and fast for her. That’s a good principle. We don’t go headlong into some risk without being fortified in prayer, knowing God is leading us. But once Esther knew she had to take this risk, she said, “I will go to the king even though it is against the law. And if I perish, I perish.”Esther was a meek, humble young woman. She was not equipped for such an assignment. She could have given any number of legitimate excuses why she just could not take this risk of approaching the king to save her people. But she knew it was a unique opportunity, and she knew it was the right thing to do. She did face the possibility of failure; she knew the extent of the risk she took, but she knew she had to do it. She said, “If I perish, I perish.”Many are very willing to serve Jesus as long as it's comfortable and not terribly demanding. They have their life plan in place, and they’ve put Jesus in the schedule. Yes, they love him, but they think things like: We're not all called to be missionaries, right? They go so far but no further. Would that describe you—maybe in part? Do you see some people who are taking risks for Jesus and doing amazing things, but you rationalize and tell yourself that it’s just not your thing?God is looking for believers who are so in love with him—soul, heart and mind—that the risk doesn't scare them. Or if it scares them, they go ahead anyway! When God is opening a new door and I know he wants me to take the next step, I usually feel very overwhelmed, inadequate, and just plain scared. Scared of the risk of failure, scared I won’t be able to do it, scared I’ll make a fool out of myself. But I just tell God I’m scared, give my fear to him, and take the next step.John Piper says, “Doing nothing needs forgiveness as much as doing the best you can and erring.” It is right to take a risk for Jesus.
Are you a risk taker? Some people would tell you not to ever take a risk, because it’s risky! Play it safe would be their motto.Taking risks is not always a smart thing to do. But if you were to talk to any successful person in any field, no doubt they would tell you about some time in their life when they took a risk. They exposed themselves to failure and maybe even ridicule, but that’s what it took for them to be successful.As we live our lives for Jesus, there will be times when we need to take a risk, move out of our comfort zones, attempt something that looks difficult, and even run the possibility of failing. For example, maybe God has been prompting you to share your faith with a coworker, but you’ve been reluctant to do so because it’s risky. You think: That coworker may react negatively, or I may botch it and say all the wrong things, or maybe it’s against the law to share my faith on the job! And so fear keeps you from taking the risk.Have you ever thought about how many times you’ve missed out on so much of what God wants you to do and the blessings that come when you obey, simply because you were not willing to take a risk? Obviously, you should always proceed with prayer and caution, but if you’re afraid of any risk, you will simply never do all the good things God has put you here to do. You’ll miss so much of God’s blessing in your life.In his insightful booklet, Risk Is Right, John Piper says his aim is to explode the myth of safety and deliver us from the enchantment of security, because it’s a mirage. It doesn’t exist. None of us know what the next moment holds, not to mention tomorrow. God never takes any risks because he knows the end from the beginning. We don’t know the end, and God doesn’t tell us. He intends for us to live by faith not by sight, and so our lives are risky.[1]Fear of risks keeps many of us paralyzed. Bonhoeffer wrote: “To delay or fail to make decisions may be more sinful than to make wrong decisions out of faith and love.”[2]I’m exploring people in the Bible who took great risks, and I hope you’ll be inspired to step out on faith and take whatever risks you need to in order to follow Christ and his plans for you.--[1] Piper, J. (2013). Risk Is Right. Crossway.[2] Eric Metaxas. (2010). Bonhoeffer : Pastor, Martyr, Prophet, Spy. Thomas Nelson.
I want to begin by asking some questions. Have you ever preached a sermon at work? Have you given the four spiritual laws over the PA system in your office? Do your coworkers beg you to take them to church with you? Do you read the Bible out loud to your coworkers each day?I’m guessing not many of you answered yes, but neither did I. Does that mean none of us are effectively witnessing for Jesus on our jobs?Effectively witnessing on our jobs. That thought frightens most Christians in the marketplace. For most of us, the idea of witnessing conjures up visions of cornering someone against their will, or passing out tracts, or badgering a coworker to go to church with us, resulting in being labeled as a religious fanatic, etc. Does that sound familiar? And yet, we know we should be sharing the good news of Jesus because there is likely someone in our work environment who really wants to know the truth. Besides, Jesus has called us to be his witnesses to the whole world.Well, let me ask you another question: Has someone on your job ever asked you a question or made a comment that opened a door for you to talk about your faith in Jesus—maybe just a little bit?Now all of us should have our hands up on that one, because if we're living our faith out in our everyday worlds as we should be, someone will ask us a question and open a door for us to share what Jesus means to us.Peter wrote:But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect (1 Peter 3:15).I believe question-answering is the most effective means we have to share who Jesus is and the good news of his gospel with the people we interact with daily.Jesus was the master of this technique. Nicodemus was fascinated with what he'd seen and heard about Jesus, so he came quietly to him to ask some questions. Jesus answered Nicodemus’s questions, explaining what it meant to be born again because Nicodemus found that a baffling statement.His interaction with the rich young ruler was a series of questions and answers. With the Samaritan woman at the well, his behavior was so unusual it caused her to ask questions. And Jesus kept leading her to ask other questions. By the time he answered her questions, he'd revealed to her that he was the Messiah, and she went back to town to tell everyone else about him. Effective witnessing, wouldn't you say? No meeting, no altar call, no one-two-three formulas. Those techniques would not have been appropriate at those times. But Jesus lived a life that generated questions, and he was prepared to answer them.Throughout our history, Christians have spread the good news of Jesus by this one-on-one question and answer method. Just look at the Church in China or any of the countries where Christians have endured persecution for years. Not only have they been unable to wipe out Christianity, as Stalin claimed he would do in Russia, but the Church grew and increased amid persecution.And how did the Church survive? They could not hold evangelical meetings; most of their churches were closed; they could not speak openly about Jesus. Yet they continued and grew because they infiltrated their society. They became living examples and question-answerers. Their presence could not be ignored because their lives told a story that caused people to ask questions.Your calling and mine is exactly the same as theirs: To infiltrate our worlds for Jesus. And I firmly believe the American marketplace is one of the last frontiers for infiltration. It's a ready-made mission field. You're already there; and you're there on equal footing with everyone else who is working with you. Your presence is legitimate, and you are there for long hours every day. What better opportunity could you ask for?Now, how do you infiltrate your world?
I am examining the difference between your job and your work when you are indeed a Christ-follower. Understanding the difference is the key to finding joy and purpose for your life.When you know what work God has planned for you to do, that job doesn't have the hold on you it used to. The frustrations don't get to you like they used to. You run into a problem, deal with it as best you can with God's help, but you always know: "Hey, this is just a job."Also, your priorities are much clearer when you understand the difference in your work and your job. You make better decisions about what to do and how you spend your time. Then you can prioritize your life so you have time to do your work.Please keep in your mind the ever-present vision of standing before Jesus to give an account of how you've used your time here on earth. We're told in 1 Corinthians 3 that our work will be shown for what it is at the Day of Judgment. And we will have either wood, hay, or straw, or we'll have gold, silver, and costly stones. And they will be tested by fire, to see which ones last.Now, wood, hay, and straw take up a lot more space than gold, silver and costly stones, right? And we get fooled sometimes by volume. A million dollars could buy a bunch of wood, hay and straw, and it would take up a great deal of space. You'd have to notice it. But if you bought a million dollars worth of gold, silver and costly stones, you could hold them in your hand or at most a small bag. You might not notice it because it wouldn't take up much room.If we don't understand the difference, we might opt for the wood, hay, and straw because it looks bigger. But that stuff goes up real fast when you strike a match to it; whereas the gold and silver and costly stones will survive any fire you put them through.Do you get the picture here? You don't want to spend your life doing things that eventually won’t matter. Don't let volume fool you; don't let appearances deceive you. Make sure you know what your work is, what God wants you to do, and then do it with all your heart, mind, and soul. That's gold, silver, and costly stones, and they will endure to eternity.
Does your job cause you a lot of frustration? Do you often feel you're just spinning your wheels or running on a treadmill, getting nowhere in your daily job? I'm talking about the differences between your job and your work. And one major difference is: Your job may sometimes produce frustration; your work will most often produce fruit.Jobs carry no guarantee of inner tranquility or accomplishment. You can work as hard as possible and never feel like you've done a whole lot. You may never get appropriate recognition for the job you do, and indeed others may take credit for what you have done. You may discover the harder you work at your job, the more frustrating it is. Often our jobs bring a great deal of frustration into our lives, for all kinds of reasons.On the other hand, your work will energize you because you know you're doing something eternally significant. Your work will bring satisfaction. You will be rewarded for your work and receive recognition from the ultimate manager, God your Father. You surely can grow weary in doing your work, but you won't grow weary of the work God has planned for you to do. Your job will end in retirement; your work will not end until death.Jobs come to an end. Either you retire or you walk away from the job, or the job is eliminated. Work, however, has no termination age. As long as life remains, there is work to be done, and it gives substance and value to every day at any age. Your work most likely will take some turns and changes as you progress through life, but there is always work to do.You may be thinking, "You mean, I can't expect to find a job I really love?” No, you can educate yourself and look for a job using your talents and strengths, and you can do your work while you’re doing your job. God plans for all of us to be lights in a dark world, so part of your work may be to shine the light and love of Jesus right there on your job.Also, God often uses our jobs to prepare us to do his work. The skills and experience I gained in my job have become a tool in God’s plan to touch lives in ways I could not have done without that job.
What is the difference between your job and your work? Your work will give you an opportunity to exercise the gifts you have—the abilities God has given you, whereas your job may not use your gifts. The use of our gifts always brings fulfillment and joy into our lives.Another difference is: Your job will result in income; your work may never result in income.Most people go to their jobs each day primarily because they get paid to do it. I'm not saying you can't enjoy doing your job and that there aren't other motivational factors involved. But there are very few who would continue going to their job each day without compensation.Your work may never pay you a dollar, but it will pay benefits that cannot be valued in earthly terms. When you are doing your work, what God has called you to do, you're putting deposits in God's heavenly bank, where thieves can't steal it, and rust cannot destroy it. Your work certainly brings compensation, but it's deposited in a different bank and held as a long-term investIn our society where people are valued by the size of their salaries and bank accounts, this is a totally different perspective for a Christian, and one we have to adjust to. It's one of those areas where we must fight not to allow the world to shove us into its mold or way of thinking. There is always someone else who can do your job; there is no one else who can do your work.If you called your employer tomorrow and said, "I'm not coming back; you won't see me again," guess what? They would survive. It might cause some temporary problems, but somebody soon would move into your role, learn your job and do it.However, you are indispensable when it comes to your work. If you don't do the work God has called you to do, it will go undone. How do you know God has work for you to do? Because of Ephesians 2:10.For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do (Ephesians 2:10).God has a to-do list just for you, and if you miss it, you’ll miss the abundant joy of doing the work God planned for you to do.If you told me I could never use the gifts God has given me, I would feel empty. Life would be tasteless. My gifts are the activities that bring meaning and joy to my life.Your job may employ your gifts, and if so, that is a blessing. If not, you still have work to do that is very meaningful. You just need to have a clear understanding, based on God’s Word, of the difference in your job and your work.
Let me ask you: As a Christian, is it essential for you to have a job that is personally fulfilling? Is that your right? Should we assume something is missing or wrong in our lives just because our job isn't what we hoped and expected it to be?Have you come to the point of acknowledging that your job is not fulfilling, and you’ve worked long enough to know no job is going to be the exciting adventure you hoped it would be? The good news is your job may never be all you want it to be, but your life can be purposeful and fulfilling when you know the work God has given you to do, and that will fill your life with meaningful and important activity.Let's consider some significant differences in your job and your work: Your job may employ none of your gifts; your work employs all your gifts.Now, first, do you know what your gifts are? All Christ-followers have at least one spiritual gift, and many times several. Romans 12 is a good starting place to learn about these gifts, and there are many good helps on this topic. If you don't know what your gifts are, start a research program and ask God to show you.The really neat thing about our gifts is what we've been gifted to do, we love to do, and it doesn't come hard for us. God is an incredibly smart manager of his human resources. He knows if I love to do what I have to do, I'm going to do it much better.It's a joy to exercise your gifts, isn't it? Now, that doesn't mean you never grow tired or weary or don't want to run away once in a while. But a few days away from doing my work, and I'm restless. I'm ready to go back.If you told me I could never use the gifts God has given me, I would feel empty. Life would be tasteless. My gifts are the activities that bring meaning and joy to my life.Your job may employ your gifts, and if so, that is a blessing. If not, you still have work to do that is very meaningful. You just need to have a clear understanding, based on God’s Word, of the difference in your job and your work.
I wonder: Do you know anyone who is out of a job? And another question: Do you know anyone who is out of work? You may be thinking, you just asked the same question.Those are two different questions because your job and your work are not the same things. We tend to get those terms confused, but they are not interchangeable terms. I want to point out the differences between our job and our work.Let's begin with some very basic definitions: Your job is what you do day-in and day-out usually to bring in income, sometimes not. It is the duties you perform, most often for an employer, for which you expect to receive money or some form of compensation.A company achieves its goals by hiring people to do jobs that are pre-designed, with job descriptions that are pre-written, without consideration of the person who will fill it.Your work, on the other hand, is what God has designed you to do. It is your purpose for being here, what you are uniquely created for. It is distinctly linked to the gifts, talents, and assets you have been given by God. Your work is for the purpose of bringing glory to God and giving you fulfillment as well. While many people may have identical jobs, no two people have the same work, because each of us has a unique plan for our lives.I wonder how many Christians really know the difference between their job and their work because when this is not clear to us, we can encounter many difficulties.For example, one of our most common mistakes is to expect a job to fulfill us. We prepare for it, work hard to get a good job, try hard for promotions and pay raises, and then reality sets in. We realize they call it work because it’s work! Not always so fulfilling; not so fun; not so rewarding.If you see your job as your work, still hoping it will bring meaning and purpose to your life, you may be experiencing some frustration, some disappointment, even some despair and hopelessness because that job—that career you worked so hard to get—doesn’t live up to your expectations.Do you know anyone who has been utterly shattered because they lost their job? Or a retiree who fell apart with no job to go to everyday? That's because their jobs defined them, and once their job went away, they didn't know who they were. They didn't have any work to do.We need a biblical perspective of our jobs, don't we?
If you will remember, this message of needing to feel good about yourself and have really good self-esteem became an unquestioned truth for most people. It became prominent in the 1980’s, when it was taught in some schools. However, the concept of self-esteem itself has roots much earlier, with certain philosophers. The general theme of this teaching was that the troubles that plague our society—crime, addictions, failed marriages, and abuse—is attributable to low self-esteem. It was thought and taught that if we could just help people think about themselves in more positive ways, then they wouldn’t do negative things and our societal problems would go away.But as I looked at myself and others, God made it clear to me that self is not my solution; self is my problem! And looking back at the topics I covered early in this ministry, I see ways I was trying to communicate this truth as early as 1989. Trying to get people to feel good about themselves will not reach into the depths of their souls and bring healing. And that’s because each of us was born in sin, we commit sin willfully, and we simply have a sin problem. The Bible says there is nothing good in ourselves—that all the righteous things we try to do are like filthy rags to God.Well, that doesn’t exactly fit with the good self-esteem message, does it? Recently I found a transcript of a sermon by Tim Keller entitled The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness[1]. Tim did such a good job of explaining how this idea of low self-esteem causing society’s big problems is just not true.I want share some of Tim’s thoughts, which are echoes of what I’ve tried to say for many years on this topic of self-esteem. The title of his booklet gives you a clue to where he’s going: The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness. When you and I can come to a place where life is not all about us, we begin to walk in the freedom Jesus came to give us. Believe me when I tell you: Self is your problem and not your solution, and when you grasp the incredible freedom of forgetting about yourself, you are going to love it.Tim asserts that up until the twentieth century, almost all cultures believed and taught that having too high a view of yourself was the root cause of all the evil in the world. Human pride, selfishness, greed, and evil were presented as the cause for all bad behavior.But in our modern western culture, we have developed a completely opposite idea. Now our educational systems, our counseling curriculums, our treatment of prisoners, and much of our legislation starts with the viewpoint that all we need is to feel good about ourselves. Think of some evil in our world today—such as abuse of children. This philosophy would have us believe this evil would go away if those who abused children didn’t have such low self-esteem.Even secular psychologists have come to see the error of this belief system. Some have reported there is no evidence that low self-esteem is a big problem in society, but rather, people with high self-esteem pose a greater threat to those around them. This is hard for people to accept. As Tim wrote: “The thing about the low self-esteem theory of misbehavior is that it is very attractive. You do not have to make any moral judgments in order to deal with society’s problems.”[2]And elsewhere Tim wrote: “If someone has a problem with low self-esteem we, in our modern world, seem to have only one way of dealing with it. That is remedying it with high self-esteem. We tell someone that they need to see that they are a great person, they need to see how wonderful they are.”Do you like people to tell you things like that? I sure do—who doesn’t? But guess what: No matter how many times people tell you that you are a great person, it doesn’t change who you are, does it? The only way you and I can truly be changed into a person of worth is when we allow God to do it in us. And that happens when we are born into God’s family through faith in Jesus Christ.
Presented by Lauren StibgenAre you an expert at something? Perhaps you have gone to school for an advanced degree in a specific subject. Your deep knowledge uniquely qualifies you among your peers and shows people just how qualified you are, but suddenly your expertise is no longer welcomed. People don’t seem to appreciate what you have to say or care about your accomplishments and accolades.We have considered different people in the Bible who seemed disposable. Let’s explore an ultimate expert who was easily dismissed or disposed of—Jesus.In Scripture, we learn of Jesus’ innate knowledge of the Word. In Luke 2:42-47, Jesus is only 12 years old when his parents take him to Jerusalem for the customary Passover. When the feast ends, they leave, but Jesus stays. Frantically searching as parents would, they go back and find him.After three days they found him in the temple courts, sitting among the teachers, listening to them and asking them questions. Everyone who heard him was amazed at his understanding and his answers (Luke 2:46-47).Surely, we know Jesus is the Son of God, which is ultimately why he knows the Word, but here Jesus establishes this at the young age of 12.After his baptism by John, we know Jesus is led into the wilderness for 40 days and tempted by Satan. When Satan tempts him in his hunger, Jesus answered, “It is written: Man shall not live on bread alone” (Luke 4:4).Again, he establishes for us a deep knowledge and reliance on the Word of God.As he began his ministry, Jesus taught in the synagogues of Galilee and was glorified by all (Luke 4:15). But then he went home to Nazareth. Going to the synagogue he read from Isaiah, and while they spoke well of him and marveled, someone asks, “Isn’t this Joseph’s son?” You can read more about this interaction in Luke 4, but it ends with them driving Jesus to the edge of town, attempting to throw him off a cliff. Why? Because he quotes Scripture about himself, and no prophet is acceptable in his hometown.Throughout the Gospels, we read about Jesus’ rebuke of the religious leaders for their actions and, well, inactions. Using Scripture the leaders of the day knew richly, he showed their hypocrisy repeatedly, ultimately leading to such great jealousy that they called for his crucifixion.Those of us who have accepted Jesus as our Lord and Savior know all of this was part of God’s plan to redeem his people and the world. Jesus lived as an expert to the ultimate sacrifice of being disposed on the cross, but he rose on the third day and has eternal life at the right hand of the Father! God’s plans are always greater.When you feel dismissed for your expertise and deep knowledge, rather than leaning into discouragement, pray to the Lord! How will he use your unique talents and gifts for his glory?Today our professional experience and expertise are always on display. From LinkedIn to TedX, to being a member of a coveted organization, if you aren’t on display, it can feel like you aren’t qualified for what is next professionally. Maybe it is a title or the way someone dresses at work. Perhaps you hope to attend meetings or a company offsite but weren’t selected.Remember, like Leah, God has a plan just for you!
Presented by Lauren StibgenYou are not enough. You feel second to everyone else, and you just can’t seem to find your place at work. Feelings of being inadequate or left out are more common at work than we talk about. An AI overview of this, highlights that these feelings can negatively impact well-being and productivity, leading to loneliness, anger, shame, and even disengagement or turnover. This isn’t good for you as an employee, and it isn’t good for you if you are an employer either. What can we do when we or our employees feel disposed of?Let’s consider Leah, the older sister of Rachel who was sought after by Jacob. We have already explored the jealousy of Joseph’s brothers. It started here—with their mothers!Leah had weak eyes, but Rachel had a lovely figure and was beautiful (Genesis 29:17).Jacob sought to marry Rachel and worked for seven years to earn her hand in marriage. What’s worse, after serving the seven years, he was duped into marrying Leah—not Rachel! You can read the entire story in Genesis 29, but Jacob works another seven years for Rachel. Leah bears many sons and a daughter for Jacob, and Rachel only two children—Joseph and Benjamin.As we did for the bleeding woman, let’s place ourselves in Leah’s shoes. Culturally she would be the first to marry. The description of her isn’t much and her sister is described as beautiful. She likely grew up knowing she was not pretty like Rachel and then faced knowing a potential husband did not really want her. She was forced into the marriage by her father, Laban. Jacob was angry at her father’s deception but accepted her. However, she was never favored. She was easily dismissed—disposable. Her children were not as loved as the children of Rachel.The sons of Jacob would become the 12 tribes of Israel. And ultimately a descendant of Leah—the easily dismissed wife—would come our savior and Lord, Jesus Christ. The opinions of man didn’t matter; God had a great plan for Leah.Today our professional experience and expertise are always on display. From LinkedIn to TedX, to being a member of a coveted organization, if you aren’t on display, it can feel like you aren’t qualified for what is next professionally. Maybe it is a title or the way someone dresses at work. Perhaps you hope to attend meetings or a company offsite but weren’t selected.Remember, like Leah, God has a plan just for you!
Presented by Lauren StibgenHave your dreams and ideas ever impacted you at work? Or maybe how much positive attention you receive from a boss? Either way, big ideas and favor from up top can often intimidate others, and it can sometimes leave you feeling easily dismissed, disposable by your peers.One of the greatest leaders in all of Israel’s history had dreams of his greatness. His name was Joseph. One could argue he should have had a little more emotional intelligence than to share such a bold dream with his jealous brothers, but it was all part of God’s plan to have Joseph save Israel. In Genesis 37 we learn Joseph was loved by Jacob more than any of his other brothers.When his brothers saw that their father loved him more than any of them, they hated him and could not speak a kind word to him (Genesis 37:4).On top of the favoritism shown to Joseph by his father, he shared his dreams which indicated that his brothers, mother, and father would one day bow down to him. In Genesis 37:11, we learn his brothers are jealous of him.Following these dreams, we learn Jacob sends Joseph to check on his brothers and bring back information on their well-being. This is when the jealousy gets the best of his brothers. First, they contemplate killing Joseph. Then, they find more benefit in selling him into slavery. Moreover, they faked his death and told poor Jacob he had died by an animal attack.The story of what happens to Joseph continues in Genesis 38-46. Being disposed of by his jealous brothers wasn’t the end of his hardship. However, we see God had great plans for him. When the famine was bad, his brothers set out to Egypt for food. Joseph, now overseeing all of Pharoah’s kingdom, saved his brothers and father from starvation.But God sent me ahead of you to preserve for you a remnant on earth and to save your lives by a great deliverance (Genesis 45:7).Clearly, God chose Joseph to be a leader. He placed dreams in Joseph’s mind that perhaps gave him hope during some of the worst trials we could ever imagine. To his brothers, he was disposable. For God’s plans, he was not.Being in leadership as a trusted advisor is a coveted position that can often lead to isolation and attack from peers and even subordinates. Jealousy and covetousness creep in and peers at work soon can work against you. This can lead to feelings of being thrown away or disposed of.In these times, trust that the Lord may be bringing you closer to him, and into a new position for his glory.
Presented by Lauren StibgenThe last several years of praying with women has opened my eyes to how physical and mental health can impact people at work. A physical disability (seen or unseen) or mental health challenges like anxiety or depression can lead to feelings of being no longer useful or dismissed—disposable.In Matthew, Mark and Luke, we find the story of the bleeding woman. Mark 5:25-34 tells us this woman has suffered from a discharge of blood for 12 years. She has suffered, seen many physicians, spent all she had, and was no better for it. Culturally, this woman would have been unclean. While this is not written, let’s pause to think of her. First, she is in physical discomfort. Perhaps she is constantly tired because she is constantly bleeding. Because she was unclean, she was socially isolated and could not work—even if she wanted to. This isolation likely created even more loneliness and despair. The financial burden would have only compounded this.If we were to transport her to today perhaps, she would be unable to work due to this condition. Her mental and financial state likely would be similar. If she needed to work, imagine the stress of managing this bleeding every day.While this woman was disposable to society, she was not disposable to Jesus. Her desperation and faith in knowing that Jesus was healing people led her into the crowds to simply touch the hem of his garment. This woman was instantly healed.Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be freed from your suffering (Mark 5:34).Throughout Scripture, we see Jesus healing people who were outcasts. He gladly touched and healed the lepers, the blind, the disabled. It was his mercy and their faith in his healing power that was on display. None of them were disposable to Jesus!Are you invertedly causing some employees to feel disposable? One of the women I am blessed to be in community with has lived with a hidden disability for many years. It can cause her severe physical pain, migraines, and gastrointestinal issues. One look at this executive leader and you would never know how much she endures to get through her days. Recently she has become an advocate for herself and for others at work who cannot participate in physical activities planned during a retreat. Golf, pickleball, and horseback riding are not possible for her. She advocated for an alternative and helped her CEO see how these activities made her feel “dispensed with” while others were having fun.As followers of Jesus Christ, how can we see others as Jesus saw the bleeding woman, the lepers, the blind, and disabled? We are called to love them like Jesus did. To him, they were perfect.
Presented by Lauren StibgenDuring one of our recent Walking Worthy podcast conversations with a fellow ministry leader and friend, we talked about the sensitive feeling of being disposable. This word sums up being cast away or used up and can summon thoughts of some of our deepest hurts whether at work or in other aspects of our lives. But being disposable is not part of our God-given identity.As an adjective, the word disposable is defined as intended to be used once, or until no longer useful, and then thrown away; or to be able to be dispensed with or easily dismissed. As a noun, disposable is defined as readily available for use as required, or an article to be thrown away after use.When we focus our identity on what the world says of us, this definition can truly impact how we feel. I would argue this is one of the roots of imposter syndrome in our work culture today.Feeling like our talent is no longer useful or valued can play on repeat in our professional mind, leading us to feel like we’re no longer qualified for the work we set forth to accomplish. In fact, I see this repeatedly with executive level women. The worst part is women in leadership roles are contributing to this feeling in other women! Intentional or not, our actions and words and our inaction or lack of words can leave those around us feeling disposable.Let’s explore this worldly “disposable” identity through a biblical lens. There are truly remarkable heroes in the Bible the world disposed of, but God used for his glory! Perhaps in our reading of them, we may not have stopped to consider their feelings. I have learned throughout the years that we often focus on the glory without pausing to see ourselves in the feelings of those God has truly used for his purposes.Do you have a hidden or other disability which has caused you to feel disposed? Maybe you have a vision of greatness of which has been disposed. Have you ever felt less than or not good enough? Perhaps you were the perfect expert for a job but simply were rejected.All these situations exist in God’s Word! They play out in the lives of real people who had a greater identity to God than they did to their fellow man or woman!I will not stop reminding you of Ephesians 2:10, but today I want to phrase it for you simply. You are created perfectly as you are by God in Christ Jesus to do just what you are doing right now. God prepared your path before you were even born. All you need to do is walk forward. You are not disposable.
Presented by Lauren StibgenThis year marked my third reading of the Bible cover to cover in a year. It isn’t a literal page by page turn from cover to cover, but a reading plan that jumps between the Old and New Testaments and a Psalm each day. My experience with reading the Bible in its entirety has proved that the Word of God continues to have new revelation to me as a believer with every read—even when I have already seen the words countless times.Recently, I have been lingering with one single verse in Psalm. Psalm 84:10 reads: Better is one day in your courts than a thousand elsewhere; I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God than dwell in the tents of the wicked.Numerous things about this verse jumped out to me but the one-word title I cannot ignore is doorkeeper—simply, the person on duty at the entrance of a building. My mind was flooded with doorkeepers. Do they still exist today? They do. The person who greets you at a nice hotel, someone taking a ticket at a movie theater, a guard at an office building.As I pondered the vocation of being a doorkeeper, I thought about describing my role to someone if they asked me about what I do for a living. I thought about what financial compensation a doorkeeper would receive. If this was my profession, would I have pride in my work or feel lowly? Simply, would I be content being a doorkeeper in the house my God? After so many years of exploring education and training in leadership and law, would I be OK just greeting people at the door?I thought about the spaces this verse described. God’s courts and the tents of wickedness. Courts feel grand, lovely, important, royal. Tents feel dirty, small, out in the wilderness, primitive. Where would I want to dwell?Often, we choose a tent. While it may not be intentional, we are easily caught up in the worldly aspects of what success looks like in the form of a title or our position on the corporate ladder. We settle for the tent of wickedness and forget to look at the glorious, beautiful royal courts in the house of God.When we are caught up in this world, we miss that the doorkeeper has a position of great importance. She is a doorkeeper in the house of God. If we stop and take a humble approach to our identity at work (leadership), we can see that we are doorkeepers to the house of God right where we are at work, and there is no better position we could every enjoy.Jesus is clear in his call to us as his followers. In Mathew 28:19-20 he exhorts, Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the father, and of the son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them all I have commanded you.How do we show up with the posture of a humble doorkeeper? Whether we are truly a doorkeeper or if we hold positions of leadership, we should consider this royal appointment with humility. If we consider our identity with God, we can take comfort.Throughout the Bible, God appointed the lowly to do great things. Consider Moses. Moses was truly resistant to the calling God had for his life to the point that he even begged God to give the job to someone else!Now Moses was a very humble man, more humble than anyone else on the face of the earth (Numbers 12:3).As we read about Moses’ leadership of the Israelites, we see how he constantly leaned on the greatness of God to help him lead the people. In Numbers 11 we see everyone complaining about food and water and wandering. Moses is displeased and “the anger of the Lord blazed hotly” (Numbers 11:10). So, Moses grows sick of the complaining, and God is just plain mad. Since they are in this leading together, Moses tells God he cannot carry the burden alone—the burden was too heavy for him.God answers and says, Bring me seventy men of the elders of Israel...Have them come to the tent of meeting, that they may stand there with you. I will come down and speak with you there, and I will take some of the power of the Spirit t...
What is God trying to teach you through your job? Recently a friend shared with me God is teaching her how to get along with all kinds of people, even those with whom she has some strong disagreements. These are coworkers who really needed to know Jesus, coming from different religious backgrounds and very different beliefs. She said through the years she was not—in her words—“very nice to my unbelieving coworkers.” Their discussions would often end with not so pleasant words of condemnation. She said, “I have not been quiet about it when I think they’re wrong.” When a new coworker joined their company who was very lovely, bright, and energetic, she liked her a lot, and then she discovered she was living an unbiblical lifestyle. She said, “I think the Lord has given me another chance here.”She is learning on her job how to love the “lost sheep”—people who don’t know Jesus. She’s learning how to communicate with them in loving ways, not in harsh, condemning ways. That’s a lesson we all need, isn’t it, but you can never learn that lesson if you never interact with unbelievers. In most situations your job puts you right in the middle of many people who do not share your faith, do not know Jesus, or even people who may think your commitment to Christ is fanatical. How do you build friends and share the love of Jesus with people like that? You can learn a Christ-like attitude right there on your job.Can you see how God is teaching you many valuable lessons through your job? You learn critical lessons about relationships—cooperation, fairness, flexibility, humility, patience—all fruits of God’s Spirit that help you to shine as a light in a dark place. You learn to forgive people who may never ask you to forgive them—who don’t even recognize or care that they have hurt you. You learn to persevere, to hang in there even when you think you can’t hang in any longer.Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything (James 1:2-4).That is the path all Christ-followers are on—growing mature and complete. Perseverance helps us get there. Maybe your job is very frustrating right now and you’re thinking of leaving. Could it be that you don’t need a different job? You just need a different attitude toward the job you have.You can grow spiritually right there where you work. Sometimes we think our spiritual growth only comes through Bible studies, church attendance, prayer, and they are all important in our lives. But you can grow much faster and in so many diverse ways if you see your job not only as a mission field but also as a classroom. Don’t miss what God wants to teach you through your job.
What are some of the most valuable things God has taught you through your job? I think we can sometimes get so weighed down with the day-to-day busyness and difficulties of our jobs that we fail to see all the good things God is doing in us and through us through those jobs. One valuable lesson you often learn in a job is how to get along with people you may not like that much.Another thing you can learn through your job is how to cast all your care on Jesus because he cares for you. Instead of taking those problems home with you every day and dumping on your family or friends, you can learn to trust God to work all things out for your good and leave those cares and concerns in his hands, so you can spend a carefree evening with your loved ones. Do you realize how absolutely important it is to learn to draw boundaries in your thought life? To not allow yourself to think about things over which you have no control? To cast all your care on Jesus regularly—everyday—so the joy of the Lord can be your strength? That’s an eternally important thing you can learn through your job.Jesus said to his disciples:Anyone who wants to be first must be the very last, and the servant of all (Mark 9:35).When you were young, did you ever tell anyone you wanted to be a servant when you grew up? I doubt it. Yet, Jesus made it clear his disciples must learn to be a servant to all. And what better place to learn that lesson than on your job each day!The way we serve God is by serving others, and developing a servant heart and attitude takes practice. You have to be intentional about it; you have to be humble and do it out of love for Jesus, not to get recognition. Think of ways you could serve your coworkers, your management, your employees.You could serve by choosing to go the extra mile and help someone get their job done (even though you think they could have done it themselves if they hadn’t wasted time talking on the phone!), help someone learn a new skill, stay late to give a helping hand to your boss, doing things for which you may get no credit or recognition. These are everyday things that can teach you the joy of being a servant, and that means you’re growing more like Jesus.
What does God want to teach you through your job? I think toward the top of that list would be learning to love people you may not like that much! Your coworkers may not necessarily people you would choose to be with five days a week, eight hours a day. No doubt you have discovered not everyone is “your type,” and so you are challenged to get along with people who are not that easy to get along with.In 1 Corinthians 13, the Bible teaches us the true definition of love. It is patient, it is kind, it looks for the good in people, not the bad, it doesn’t hold grudges, it hangs in with someone when others have given up, and it endures all things.God’s love is an action, not necessarily a feeling, and you can choose to love someone by showing them these kinds of actions, even if you don’t like the way they behave, the way they treat you, their work habits, or their lifestyle.Almost any job you have—and that includes working in a Christian environment—places you in the company of other people, and you have the privilege, the great opportunity, to learn to love people with God’s kind of love. That means you become more and more like Jesus, as you follow his commandment to “love one another.”Of course, you also have the option of refusing to learn this lesson, and instead just being continually irritated and negative about the people you work with or for. You can choose to gripe and complain and blame others for your bad attitude. But all that gets you are bitter roots growing in your heart, which will cause you great pain and affect those around you, as well. But if you can see what God wants to teach you through working with difficult people, you then can turn a desert into a garden and use that tough place as your training grounds to teach you this incredibly useful and critical ability to love and get along with people you don’t like that much.And just consider this—as you accept and learn what God wants to teach you through your job, your light for Jesus shines so much brighter. You have the great privilege of demonstrating through the way you work and the way you treat others the difference it makes when Jesus is the central focus of your life. I want to encourage you not to miss what God wants to teach you through your job. They are worthwhile lessons that will make a difference in your life and your testimony for Jesus.
You have learned skills and gained experience on your jobs that have proven very beneficial to your career, and those skills and abilities have been an important part of your growth. Just stop and think about how your jobs have taught you many skills and made you more productive and confident. I think in the midst of hectic schedules and deadlines and difficulties, it’s easy to overlook the many good things you’re learning and ways you’re growing simply by doing your job each day.In addition, think about the many life and relationship skills you are learning, even while you’re in it. It may seem more like baptism by fire rather than a training experience. Here are some examples of the practical and important things you should be learning in a job, if indeed you’re doing a good job. You learn: The importance of being on time. The importance of meeting deadlines. How to work with a team to accomplish a task. How critical it is to fulfill your promises and commitments. That it’s very important to do everything with excellence and avoid do-overs! That procrastination is deadly. That you can’t afford to let things fall between the cracks.Those are just some of the practical things you learn when you accept the responsibility of a job. For sure a job well-done will require these kinds of skills. And if you are not willing to learn these things and grow in these areas, it will affect your progress, your promotions, and your paycheck; it will hold you back.I would ask you to survey your work habits. Are you learning these things, or are you resisting them? Have you established a reputation within your organization of being truly committed to doing your job with excellence, to improving and learning and growing? I’ve often said a Christ-follower may not be the smartest or the most educated or the most experienced person on their job, but they can be the most dependable, the hardest worker, and have the highest level of integrity. No matter what you do or where God takes you, these characteristics will always be important to your success and to pleasing God.
Have you ever thought of your workplace as God’s classroom for you? This may be a totally new thought for you—that God can use your job, the people you work with and for, and the atmosphere where you work as a training course. I must confess I didn’t always see my job that way. But God never wastes anything in our lives. He uses every experience, every person, every struggle, even our failures and sinful choices to teach us something we need to learn, so we can move forward—becoming more like Jesus.Having this attitude about your job—looking at it as a training course, so to speak—could make it a bit easier to get up and go to work every day. It gives new meaning to your workdays, even if those days aren’t always pleasant. When you start to see the lessons God wants to teach you through your job, it’s a paradigm shift; a new perspective that gives meaning even to mundane and tedious work, even to irritating relationships, even to a demanding boss or heavy workload.Think about this: No matter what you do on your job each day, you have developed skills and abilities through that job that are valuable. I have a friend who is teaching communication skills in a very different and difficult cross-cultural environment. As she was telling me what she does and how she has learned to communicate in this challenging setting, I told her what she is learning through her experience in this job, though difficult at times, is giving her skills and abilities that are rare and very valuable. She’s learning “on the job” as we say, and that knowledge and skill is giving her very important and marketable skills you could not learn in a classroom.Certainly, that’s been true in my life, as well, as I spent many years conducting training seminars in my company and for many other companies across the country. That experience of putting together and making an effective presentation is a skill God was teaching me through my job—and one he now uses for ministry purposes.Think about what you’ve learned through your jobs and how God is—or maybe how God wants to use that in his service.
Having been to Israel many times, leading tours, I have a much clearer vision of what a crucifixion was really like and how horrendous it must have been to have watched anyone dying on a cross. We have tended to romanticize the cross a bit, with our jewelry and pictures of a cross on a hill far away, but actually the place of crucifixion was the most horrible place in Jerusalem. It would have been by a busy road so everyone could see and mock and be terrified by a crucifixion. It was meant to be a deterrent to crime and rebellion, to cause anyone who thought they might challenge the rule of Rome to think twice, because they would have to endure this horrible death.Knowing how awful a crucifixion was, it is amazing to read in Matthew 27:55 that: Many women were there, watching from a distance. They had followed Jesus from Galilee to care for his needs. Among them were Mary Magdalene, Mary the mother of James and Moses, and the mother of Zebedee’s sons. In Mark 15:40 we read: Some women were watching from a distance. Among them were Mary Magdalene, Mary the mother of James the younger and of Joses, and Salome. In Galilee these women had followed him and cared for his needs. Many other women who had come up with him to Jerusalem were also there.Luke tells us that: A large number of people followed him, including women who mourned and wailed for him (Luke 23:27). And John tells us: Near the cross of Jesus stood his mother, his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene (John 19:25).By my count, there are seven women who are identified in the four Gospels, but we know there were many others as well. It’s interesting that the women are named, and yet there are no named men at the cross. Certainly, there were men there, but how many were the friends and disciples of Jesus Christ? We only know for sure that John was there, because Jesus refers to him in John 19:26-27, as he instructs him to care for his mother. Where were the other disciples?And why were all these women there at this ugly scene? It was not a place for a woman; unless it was your close relative, no woman would have intentionally gone to such a horrible place. Yet, there were all these women at the cross of Jesus. These women had gathered there to mourn and to wail the crucifixion of their Savior, Jesus Christ.They were there because they loved Jesus. They had been delivered from their sins and their pasts by Jesus, and they were determined to stay with him until the end, as ugly as it was. Can you even imagine what it meant for these women to stay there throughout the whole crucifixion?Mary Magdalene was there. We know Jesus had delivered her from seven demons. There have been some scurrilous writings and suggestions that Jesus had a romantic relationship with Mary Magdalene. That is a lie and totally unsubstantiated by Scripture or history. But for sure, this woman had deep feelings for Jesus because he had delivered her from her past. And it was an awful past.Can you even imagine being possessed by seven demons? What could be worse than to be indwelled by seven demons from hell? No doubt she had been abused and suffered great harm from these demons for many years. No doubt she was full of guilt and gloom and despair, fearing she would live all her days possessed by them.And then she met Jesus. In Mark 16:9 we read that Jesus had driven out those demons. However he did that, it had to be dramatic—perhaps painful—but no doubt the best day of her life. She was set free from her past, her guilt, her shame.And because Jesus has risen from the dead, he is able to do the same for you today. It may not be demons you are dealing with, but whatever haunts you from your past, Jesus is a qualified Savior because he is risen from the dead. He can deliver you, too.We are told that Mary, his mother, was at the cross. As she stood there, she must have remembered the prophecy told to her by Simeon when they took baby Jesus ...
I wonder why we call it Good Friday? For those of us who have placed our trust in Jesus Christ as our Savior, celebrating his resurrection is of utmost importance to us. Our salvation rests on the fact that Christ is risen indeed. Yet, why we would call this Friday a “good” day?That day is a good day if you have an eternal perspective. The day Jesus died is the Day of Atonement, when once and for all, Jesus became our sacrifice, shedding his blood, paying the debt we owe, so we could be forgiven of our sins and made righteous in Jesus.God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God (2 Corinthians 5:21).That is what took place as Jesus was crucified. Therefore, he had to die in order to become a perfect sacrifice that would pay for our sins. As a result, we have the opportunity to become the righteousness of God, so that God sees us in Christ, redeemed and righteous before him.It's a Good Friday for us because Jesus gave his all on that day. However, without Resurrection Sunday, this Friday would not be good. It is because of the resurrection we can call this Good Friday—the day Jesus paid it all for us. The price he paid—bearing all our sin and being separated from his Father—was far greater than the agony of the crucifixion, as terrible as that was. And he endured it for you, declaring as he died, It is finished. He did it all so you and I could be assured of eternity with him.
There is no other religion that claims to have a risen savior; Jesus is the only qualified Savior because he conquered death. We worship a risen Savior who gives us victory over death.I wonder if you could articulate why you believe in the resurrection of Jesus Christ. Josh McDowell’s book, Evidence for the Resurrection[1], goes into this in great detail. Here are some of the facts that prove the resurrection:#1: The broken Roman sealBecause the religious leaders were afraid the disciples would steal the body and claim Jesus was risen, they asked Pilate to put the seal of the Roman Empire on the tomb. The consequences of breaking that seal would give pause to anyone who might try to steal the body, because that would have been a crime punishable by death. The disciples were not a courageous body of men at this time. They were hiding from authorities after fleeing from the Garden of Gethsemane. There’s no way they would have tried to steal Jesus’ body, and they certainly would have been too frightened to break the Roman seal.#2: The large stone was movedAll the Gospel writers mention the huge stone in front of the tomb had been moved. John said it was removed from the entrance. Luke and Mark say it was rolled away from the tomb; Matthew records an angel from heaven came down and rolled back the stone. This stone weighed one and a half to two tons, so it would take several very strong men to roll it even a few inches. McDowell writes, “Now, I ask you, if the disciples had wanted to come in, tiptoe around the sleeping guards, and then roll the stone over and steal Jesus’ body, how could they have done that without the guards’ awareness?”#3: The behavior of the disciplesConsider once the disciples knew Jesus was raised from the dead, and they were empowered by the Holy Spirit, they didn’t go to some faraway place to preach the gospel. They went right back to Jerusalem, where, if what they were teaching was false, it would be most evident. That would be the last place they’d want to go if they had not seen the risen Christ and knew the tomb was empty. They preached the gospel of the resurrected Christ in Jerusalem, and there was no doubt Jesus had risen.I encourage you to meditate on the resurrection of Jesus Christ, see that empty tomb, and celebrate the risen Savior.---[1] Mcdowell, J., & Mcdowell, S. (2008). Evidence for the Resurrection: What it means for Your Relationship with God. Baker Publishing Group.
For many years, I was privileged to lead groups on a visit to Israel, the Holy Land. The highlight of those days in Israel is the last day when we visit a site in Jerusalem that could well be the place where Jesus was crucified. Next to is, there is a garden with an ancient tomb, dating back to the time of Jesus. There is much evidence to believe this could be the garden where Joseph of Arimathea and Nicodemus took the body of Jesus and placed it in that tomb.Each of us goes into that tomb and comes back out, and the word on our lips is always, “It is empty; he is risen!” I always imagine what it must have been like for Mary Magdalene and Peter and John as they discovered the empty tomb. In John 20 we read that Simon Peter went into the tomb, where he saw the strips of linen lying there, as well as the cloth that had been wrapped around Jesus’ head. The cloth was still lying in its place, separate from the linen (John 20:7).It’s an interesting little detail John gives us, and you might wonder why he made sure it was recorded that the cloth was folded up by itself. In order to understand this, you have to understand a little bit about Hebrew tradition of that day. The folded napkin had to do with the master and servant, and every Jewish person knew this tradition. When the servant set the dinner table for the master, he made sure it was exactly the way the master wanted it. The table was furnished perfectly, and then the servant would wait just out of sight, until the master had finished eating. The servant would not dare touch that table, until the master was finished.When he finished, he would rise from the table, wipe his fingers, his mouth, and his beard and would wad up that napkin and toss it onto the table. The servant would then know to clear the table, for in those days, the wadded napkin meant, “I’m done.” But if the master got up from the table, and folded his napkin, and laid it beside his plate, the servant would not dare touch the table, because the servant knew the folded napkin meant, “I’m not finished yet.” The folded napkin meant, “I’m coming back!”John is careful to record the napkin was folded, because he knew it would be very meaningful to the disciples! He’s coming back! He’s not dead; he’s alive.You and I need to be just as thrilled and excited as Peter and John and Mary Magdalene were the day they walked into that empty tomb.
Are you preparing to celebrate the empty tomb this Sunday? As Christians, all our hope is vested in the good news that we serve a risen Savior.Have you ever thought how depressing it would be to worship a savior who was dead? Death is the enemy; death is the reason we need a savior, to make sure we’re ready to die. But how can I be ready to die if the one I worship is dead? What can a dead savior do for me?The Apostle Paul reminds us in his letter to the Corinthians, if only for this life we have hope in Christ, we are of all people most to be pitied (1 Corinthians 15:19). He’s saying if Jesus were just a good man who lived for 33 years and then died, why would we put our hope in him? Why would we trust him to bring us to eternal life? But, Paul continues, Christ has indeed been raised from the dead, the firstfruits of those who have fallen asleep (1 Corinthians 15:20).How do we know Christ is risen from the dead? First, because the Bible makes it abundantly clear he rose bodily, and he now lives in his resurrection body at the right hand of the Father in heaven. But beyond that, there is much evidence for the resurrection.For example, a scholar of Classics from Auckland University, E. M. Blailock, says, “I claim to be a historian. My approach to Classics is historical. And I tell you that the evidence for the life, the death, and the resurrection of Christ is better authenticated than most of the facts of ancient history.”Obviously, all ancient history we know and believe is based on eyewitnesses from the time who wrote about it. And all four Gospel writers have given us eyewitness accounts that are totally compatible and indisputable.Another evidence is the disciples, those who saw the risen Christ, were willing to give their lives for him, and they did. They were depressed and defeated when Jesus was crucified; they thought it was over; they were frightened of the leaders. Only a risen Christ, whom they saw, to whom they talked, could invoke such devotion and commitment from them. They knew he was risen.And personally, we who have been born from above know he is risen, because he has brought new life to us and only a risen Savior could do that! Celebrate the empty tomb! Jesus Christ is risen from the tomb!
Which is the most important event for Christians to celebrate: Jesus’ birth or Jesus’ resurrection? There’s no reason to choose between the two. Celebrating Christmas is joyful, and it causes us to remember Jesus chose to come to earth, as a babe taking on human flesh, in order to become our Savior.However, there is no question the most important event for Christians to celebrate is the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead.The Apostle Paul made that clear to the doubting people of Corinth. He wrote:But if it is preached that Christ has been raised form the dead, how can some of you say that there is no resurrection of the dead? If there is no resurrection of the dead, then not even Christ has been raised. And if Christ has not been raised, our preaching is useless and so is your faith…And if Christ has not been raised, your faith is futile, you are still in your sins (1 Corinthians 15:12-14, 17).Have you ever wondered why almost anybody will celebrate Christmas, the birth of the Christ child, but celebrating the resurrection is not so universally accepted? Let’s face it: It does strain credulity and sound quite brazen to say you believe someone was raised from the dead.Some time ago I was explaining to some international students from China what Christians believe. These young women had no religious background whatsoever. So, I told them we believe in the virgin birth and the resurrection of Jesus, and I explained why both are so vital to our faith. As I was speaking to them, I thought to myself how absolutely unreal—perhaps even absurd—it must have seemed to these young women. Did I actually believe Jesus was buried in a tomb, but after three days, he left that tomb empty on his own, alive forevermore?No other religion in the world has a risen savior. No other religion claims their leader or their deity rose from the dead. They worship their graves, in some cases; they memorialize how and where they died. But they don’t claim their savior became alive again.As we come up to the celebration of the resurrection of Jesus Christ, we need to think again of that empty tomb. Jesus is the only qualified Savior because he has conquered death. We need to celebrate this glorious truth and tell others about it.
What should you do when suddenly you lose your job? I’m Mary Lowman and Maribeth Foley is here with me again this week. That’s where she is right now, as she walks through the stress and fears that can grip you when you need a job and nothing is happening. Her story will encourage you, so please listen in.
Presented by Julie BusteedWe have been talking about our identity. How we identify ourselves, how we think about ourselves. Here’s a definition of identity: it is the set of qualities, beliefs, personality traits, appearance, or expressions that characterize a person.Unfortunately, finding your identity is never as easy as looking up the definition. There are so many factors that come into play. For example, culture will tell you how to deal with an identity crisis: they advise you to ground yourself in your core values, be aware of your emotions, create a mental fitness plan, enlist the help of a coach, and stay optimistic about the future.While these may “sound” good, they are really all dependent on you. They rely on your own strength and might, and that is daunting. But if your foundation is the Word of God, you have a trustworthy and reliable source that is relevant to your life today.If you are in Christ, a Christ-follower, then you have the mind of Christ (1 Corinthians 2:16).Back to the dictionary. Webster defines the mind as the part of a person that feels, perceives, thinks, wills, and reasons. Since we have the mind of Christ, we have the Holy Spirit. The Spirit who knows the thoughts of God, teaches us, guides us, helps us to obey, brings joy and freedom, produces fruit in us, transforms us, and the list goes on. In every area of our life, we can have the mind of Christ and understand spiritual things.What would happen if you made it your goal to constantly pursue the mind of Christ? What would happen if that became your identity?As we continue on this journey of realizing our true identity in Christ, we will be changed to be more and more like him. I pray as Paul does for the Ephesians:I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people, and his incomparably great power for us who believe (Ephesians 1:18-19).
Presented by Julie BusteedHow do you define yourself? Is it by your family, the church you attend, or your job? What does it mean to be identified as a Christ-follower?We have looked at how we are made in God’s image and how that defines us. We are also loved by God so deeply we can hardly grasp how wide and long and high and deep it is. And we are also chosen by him for his good purposes.We are also made for community—to be in community. And this community defines us. We were not created to live isolated lives. The first and best example is our Triune God—Father, Son and Holy Spirit. They are eternal and distinct, and yet they are one. Yes, not an easy concept for our minds to wrap around. But we see beginning in Genesis the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit are at the creation of the world. They are in community with one another.We were not created to go it alone. A 2024 Harvard survey found 21% of adults in the U.S. feel lonely. They feel disconnected from friends and family. The data suggests it may be due to anxiety, depression and a lack of meaning and purpose.[1]Because we are made in God’s image and he is One God in three persons, we are made to be not only in relationship with God but with each other. We need each other for encouragement, to love and care for one another, to be accountable to each other, to worship and praise God together. And in essence, learn about who we are—our identity.Paul also describes the body of Christ like our own body:For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others (Romans 12:4-5).We all belong to each other. When you don’t show up for church or Bible study it doesn’t just affect you. Your presence is missed whether you realize it or not. Showing up is huge! Let’s remember each of us are a vital part of the body of Christ—it’s part of who we are—for our own good and for his glory.---[1] Batanova, M., Weissbourd, R., & McIntyre, J. (2024). (rep.). Loneliness in America: Just the Tip of the Iceberg? (Ser. Making Caring Common, pp. 1–14). Cambridge, MA: The President and Fellows of Harvard College.
Presented by Julie BusteedHave you ever wanted to be chosen for something and not been picked? There are many opportunities in our life when we can be chosen. For example, as a child you get picked to be on a sports team based on your size and skill. When you are interviewing for a job or a promotion, you are being evaluated and chosen by the degrees you have and your work history and performance.The Apostle Peter tells us:You are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light (1 Peter 2:9).We are chosen by God. Have you ever tried to really wrap your head around that truth? It’s not based on anything we have done. In fact, he chose us before the creation of the world (Ephesians 1:4). We are his treasured possession (Deuteronomy 7:6).God accepts us, chooses us, loves us as we are right now. You don’t have to put your resume together with a great cover letter and references and prepare for an interview. His choosing you is not based on your past successes or failures. It’s all because of Christ’s saving grace and sacrifice on the cross.Since we are chosen, how then does this affect our daily lives? The Apostle Paul told the Colossians:Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience (Colossians 3:12).Because we are chosen by God, we are to act with compassion toward everyone, even those who annoy us. We are to be kind to people, even those who are unkind to us.We are to act with humility and to quote C.S. Lewis, “Humility is not thinking less of yourself, but thinking of yourself less.” And we also need to be gentle and patient with one another. Be gentle with your words to coworkers. Be patient with loved ones.Practicing these things—also known as the fruit of the Spirit—will not only honor God, but it also will cause others to notice the difference in your life. God has chosen you. He is calling you into a relationship with himself.
Presented by Julie BusteedHow do you introduce yourself? What’s the first thing you tell others about yourself when meeting someone new?The Apostle John writes:See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him (1 John 3:1).I’m in awe that the Father has lavished his great love on me. God almighty is extravagantly generous with his great love toward his children. It is his heart.To know your identity is a child of God and that he loves you, should give you such peace and rest and confidence and security.But, what if you’re not “feeling” loved right now. How do you continue to rest and walk in God’s love? Let’s look at how the Bible defines love. The Apostle John continues:This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us (1 John 3:16).And Paul in Romans tells us:But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us (Romans 5:8).Not only does God lavish his love on us, but he’s the one who sent his son to die for us to save us and to reconcile us to himself. We don’t have to earn his love. It is a free gift.If you’re in a hard place right now—uncertain about the future of your job, in a difficult season in a relationship, or struggling with your health—it can be difficult to feel like God is with you and loves you. But you especially need to preach this truth to yourself during these times. Keep reminding yourself he does love you. Your feelings are not always to be relied on! When you consistently read God’s word, meditate on it in your heart and mind, study, and even memorize it, you will be able to recall his truth when you are in a difficult place.My prayer for us echoes Paul’s prayer for the Ephesians:I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God (Ephesians 3:17-19).
Presented by Julie BusteedDo you know you are a child of the King? Do you live in that reality? Years ago, I remember my Aunt Fran sending me a paper gold crown in the mail with a note that said, “You are a princess. You are a child of the King.”At the time, I laughed and shook my head and said that’s Aunt Franny for you—sending and doing these crazy things. But as I reflect on it—and she did get her point across because I remember it all these years later—it was a great reminder of my true identity. Because I know Christ and am his, he is my King. That makes me royalty.We have so many titles for ourselves. We have our job titles and roles. We are also wives, mothers, daughters, sisters, and friends. We also identify ourselves by where we live or where we were born. There’s so much talk about which generation we belong to—a Boomer, Gen X, Millennial, Gen Z, Alpha. Maybe you identify yourself by how many followers or likes you have on social media. There are so many ways to identify ourselves. But what is your true identity?What you think about yourself—what you say to yourself—has an incredible impact on how you behave and live out your life.If you are a Christ follower, the most important thing is to find out what God’s Word has to say. We’ll talk about five ways God sees us, and in turn how we should rightly view ourselves.Starting at the beginning in Genesis we learn we are made in his image.Then God said, “Let us make mankind in our image, in our likeness, so that they may rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky, over the livestock and all the wild animals, and over all the creatures that move along the ground.” So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them (Genesis 1:26-27).When you stop and mediate on this truth, it’s astounding. The creator of this world created us in his own image. He gifted us with unique talents, skills, emotions, and minds. Psalm 139 says we are fearfully and wonderfully made.Our self-value or worth is not in what we think about ourselves, our bodies, or our lives. We have value because we are fearfully and wonderfully made in the image of God.
If you’ve ever found yourself suddenly out of a job, for whatever reason, you know the trauma that can bring into your life. How should a Christian respond when you’re in job hunting mode through no fault of your own? I, Mary Lowman, have a friend who will share her story with you and I believe you will be encouraged. So, please join us.
I’d like you to think of someone you know who you consider to be a truly godly, mature Christian. What is the major characteristic you admire about that person? I doubt you would say, “They have very high self-esteem.” And yet we often hear you must have high self-esteem in order to be successful.In his booklet, The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness, Tim Keller talks about gospel-humility, which he defines as not needing to think about yourself. That is a lesson God has been teaching me for years—that self is not my solution, it’s my problem. The more I can forget myself, the better off I am. When you don’t need to think about yourself, it means you have a very good understanding of who you are in Christ, and that’s all you need to know.Tim writes, “True gospel-humility means I stop connecting every experience, every conversation, with myself. In fact, I stop thinking about myself.” It’s not something we try to do; it’s something that happens as we more and more know our true identity in Christ.A truly gospel-humble person doesn’t hate herself; she just doesn’t think about herself. This self-forgetful person would never be terribly hurt by criticism because she doesn’t put much value on what other people think about her, any more than what she thinks about herself.Not long ago someone was very upset with me, due mainly to miscommunication, and she let me know it. Although her response didn’t make me happy, I was amazed to see it did not devastate me. I’m slowly getting to the place where my self-worth depends less and less on what other people think about me—even on what I think about myself. Criticism or praise from others is not what my identity is built on any longer—at least not like it has been in the past. And my friends, this is wonderful freedom.There is true freedom in self-forgetfulness. You get to that place by immersing yourself in the truth of God’s Word, making loving God and loving others your highest priority, and then you discover gradually you are thinking less and less about yourself, about your hurt feelings, about how you compare to others or what others think about you. It is marvelous freedom, and every Christian should know and live in this freedom.
If you were asked to name the greatest Christian in all of history, who would you name? The Apostle Paul would be high on most of our lists—maybe top. What a great man of God who did so much to birth the early church. With his track record, he should have had very high self-esteem, don’t you think?Listen to what he wrote about himself well into his years of ministry:Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst (1 Timothy 1:15).He didn’t say he was the worst sinner, but he said: “I am the worst sinner.” As Tim Keller points out in his booklet, The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness, this is incomprehensible to our modern western ears. “We are not used to someone who has incredible confidence volunteering the opinion that they are one of the worst people. We are not used to someone who is totally honest and totally aware of all sorts of moral flaws—yet has incredible poise and confidence.”Paul understood fully he was a sinner, but he did not allow his sins to become his identity. Tim writes: “He does not see a sin and let it destroy his sense of identity.” In the same way, he does not connect his accomplishments with his identity.Think of how differently we think. If I see myself as a bad person, then I assume I can’t do anything worthwhile, and I have no confidence. But not the Apostle Paul. As Tim writes: “Paul has reached the place where he is not thinking about himself anymore. When he does something wrong or something good, he does not connect it to himself anymore.”That doesn’t mean he is no longer accountable, but it simply means his identity is based on what Christ has done for him and what Christ has declared to be true—that he is a new creation, and he is counted righteous because he has been given the righteousness of Christ. The more you get that, the less you have to think about yourself, and the less you think about yourself, the more you become like Christ. It is our self-absorption, our self-centeredness that drives us to despair and keeps us in bondage. Incredible freedom is ours as we more and more don’t think about ourselves.
I’m sharing some thoughts from Tim Keller’s booklet, The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness.Tim writes: “If someone has a problem with low self-esteem, we, in our modern world, seem to have only one way of dealing with it. That is remedying it with high self-esteem. We tell someone that they need to see that they are a great person, they need to see how wonderful they are.”Do you like people to tell you things like that? I sure do—who doesn’t? But guess what: No matter how many times people tell you that you are a great person, it doesn’t change who you are, does it? The only way you and I can truly be changed into a person of worth is when we allow God to do it in us. And that happens when we are born into God’s family through faith in Jesus Christ, and then the Holy Spirit takes up residence in us and begins transforming us into the likeness of Jesus Christ, with ever increasing glory, as we read in 2 Corinthians 3:18.One clear proof you are no longer trapped in this false belief about the need for high self-esteem is you truly forget yourself. You are not the first person you think of in the morning—at least not every morning! You don’t compare yourself to others and feel either superior or inferior, because you just don’t think about comparing yourself to others. That happens when you are learning to be content with who you are, the way God created you, and how God has gifted you.As Tim writes: “Boosting our self-esteem by living up to our own standards or someone else’s sounds like a great solution. But it does not deliver. It cannot deliver.” If you’re missing the freedom that is rightfully yours as a daughter or son of God through faith in Jesus Christ, if you’re trapped in a pursuit of good self-esteem, I invite you to find real freedom by learning what it means to live in the joy of self-forgetfulness. This is not to degrade yourself or deny your gifting. Rather it is coming to a place where you are not always plagued with trying to be what others want you to be or trying to make yourself look good. You’re just not very concerned with what others think about you, because you are just not thinking about yourself that much.
Have you ever said or thought: “My problem is I have low self-esteem”? I think most of us have had those feelings at some time. After all, that’s the message we’ve been fed from many sources: If you could just get rid of that low self-esteem, you would feel good about yourself, and you could put all your problems behind you.I’m sharing from Tim Keller’s booklet: The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness, and he points out that up until the twentieth century, almost all cultures believed and taught that having too high a view of yourself was the root cause of all the evil in the world. Human pride, selfishness, greed, and evil were presented as the cause for all bad behavior.But in our modern western culture, we have developed a completely opposite idea. Now our educational systems, our counseling curriculums, our treatment of prisoners, and much of our legislation starts with the viewpoint that all we need is feel good about ourselves. Think of some evil in our world today—such as abuse of children. This philosophy would have us believe this evil would go away if those who abused children didn’t have such low self-esteem.Even secular psychologists have come to see the error of this belief system. Some have reported there is no evidence that low self-esteem is a big problem in society, but rather people with high self-esteem pose a greater threat to those around them. But this is hard for people to accept. As Tim writes, “The thing about the low self-esteem theory of misbehavior is that it is very attractive. You do not have to make any moral judgments in order to deal with society’s problems.”If you’ve been trapped in this belief that you just needed some better self-esteem, I urge you to let it go and come to God’s truth as given in his Word. Feeling good about yourself can only be achieved as a by-product of knowing who you are in Christ and then forgetting yourself as you live your life to love God and love others. There is great freedom in self-forgetfulness, and if you’re struggling with this issue, I highly recommend this booklet by Tim Keller, The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness.
Since 1984 we’ve been broadcasting the good news that God’s Word is relevant to all areas of our lives, and most definitely to our jobs and careers. Very early on in this ministry, God began to show me the error of the self-esteem teaching that seemed to be sweeping the country.The general theme of this teaching was the troubles that plague our society—crime and addictions and failed marriages and abuse—all of it is attributable to low self-esteem. It was thought and taught that if we could just help people think about themselves in more positive ways, then they wouldn’t do these things, and our societal problems would go away.As I looked at myself and others, God made it clear to me that self is not my solution; self is my problem! And looking back at the topics I covered early in this ministry, I see that early on I was trying to communicate this truth. Trying to get people to feel good about themselves will not reach into the depths of their souls and bring healing. And that’s because each of us was born in sin, we commit sin willfully, and we simply have a sin problem. The Bible says there is nothing good in our selves—that all the righteous things we try to do are like filthy rags to God.That doesn’t exactly fit with the good self-esteem message, does it? Recently I found a booklet by Tim Keller entitled The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness[1]. Tim did such a good job of explaining how this idea that low self-esteem is society’s big problem is just not true.I want share some of Tim’s thoughts, which are echoes of what I’ve tried to say for many years on this topic of self-esteem. The title gives you a clue to where he’s going: The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness. When you and I can come to a place where life is not all about us, we begin to walk in the freedom Jesus came to give us. Believe me when I tell you: Self is your problem, not your solution, and when you grasp the incredible freedom of forgetting about yourself, you are going to love it.---[1] Keller, T. J. (2014). The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness: The path to true Christian joy. 10Publishing.
In part one I introduced you to the story of Jehoshaphat, one of the kings of Judah. It is found in 2 Chronicles 20 and is one of my favorite chapters in the Bible. I encourage you to read it for yourself; if you have time now, open your Bible to the 20th chapter of 2 Chronicles and follow along with me. Judah was the smallest of the two Israeli nations, with only two tribes. They were headquartered in Jerusalem, but they were small and not really equipped to fight a large enemy army.Yet, in this chapter we learn that all of a sudden three enemy armies are headed their way with the full intent to destroy all of them and take over their land. We saw how Jehoshaphat responded when he heard this frightening news. He was alarmed, as you would expect, but his first move was to inquire of the Lord. Then, from his prayer, we are gleaning seven R’s that tell us what we should do when we don’t know what to do. Truly Jehoshaphat had no plan of how they could ever defeat this great army coming against them. But instead of feeling sorry for himself or running away or giving up, he inquired of the Lord.First, he recited who God was, so he and his people would be God-centered instead of problem-focused. Then he remembered how God had been faithful to them in times past—he remembered how God had always been with them. So, the first two R’s are: Recite who God is. Remember what God has done for you in the past.Now, we begin with the third R:#3: Recall God's promises.That’s what Jehoshaphat does next. He says:If calamity comes upon us...we will stand in your presence before this temple that bears your Name and will cry out to you in our distress, and you will hear us and save us (2 Chronicles 20:9).God had given them the promise that if they would stand in his presence before the temple and cry out to God, he would hear and save them. Jehoshaphat was claiming that promise. He didn’t need to remind God of his promise; he needed to recall it himself and the people of Judah needed to remember how God had promised to take care of them.The Bible has promises there just for you, did you know that? Have you learned to turn to God's Word and ask for a promise when you face an impossible situation?I remember when I first started this ministry in 1984 on one station in Chicago. That's all I ever figured it would be, and I was thrilled that God had given me that opportunity. Then shortly after, opportunities began to open, and it dawned on me that this ministry could grow and become much larger than I'd ever imagined. And I was frightened; I knew how inadequate I was for such an assignment. I knew how inexperienced I was. And I really wanted to back out. But I couldn't deny that God had opened the doors in a miraculous way.So, I sat down with my Bible and prayed, "Lord, if this is a ministry you have for me, then please, give me a promise to hang on to as I embark upon it, because I know there will be days and times when I will want to quit.” Well, my reading that day included Isaiah 50, and right there in that wonderful chapter is God's promise for me. Let me share it with you:The Sovereign Lord has given me an instructed tongue, to know the word that sustains the weary. . . Because the Sovereign Lord helps me, I will not be disgraced. Therefore I have set my face like flint, and I know I will not be put to shame (Isaiah 50: 4-7).I knew that was God’s promise to me. Those verses are now framed in my office, and I can't tell you how many times I've gone back to them when I've been discouraged, when I've been tired, when I've been wearied of the responsibility. And that promise has sustained me and strengthened me to set my face like flint and claim the promise that I would not be put to shame.Do you need a promise from God right now? Go to his Word and ask for it; God will give one to you, too.#4: Restate the problem to God.Now, after Jehoshaphat has recited who God is,
I’m examining how we can fight our way out of discouragement and find victory over that common struggle.Find someone whose faith is strongPaul wrote to the Romans: I long to see you…that you and I may be mutually encouraged by each other's faith (Romans 1:11-12). Here's another biblical principle for defeating discouragement: Spend some time with a person whose faith is strong. Let them share their faith with you.Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching (Hebrews 10:25).We need to get together more often, even in the midst of our busy lives, because we need each other to stay encouraged. If you've been trying to go it on your own, without fellowship with other believers, you will find discouragement lurking at your door.Stay in the WordFor everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through endurance and the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope (Romans 15:4).Make yourself get into the Word of God. Even if it seems dry and lifeless to you, keep reading. It was written for our encouragement, and if you keep reading, it will encourage you.Focus on Jesus' returnIn 1 Thessalonians, we are told of the return of Jesus, and Paul writes to encourage each other. When you think you can't take this old world anymore, when it looks like there is no hope on the horizon, when you're just fed up with everything, start talking about Jesus' coming again. How often do you say, "Even so, come quickly, Lord Jesus!"? How often do you think, "It may be today!"? The more we think about his second coming, the more we will be encouraged.Don't fight - show up!In 2 Chronicles 20 the prophet, Jahaziel said: Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God's...Go out to face them tomorrow, and the Lord will be with you.You're never going to win your battle on your own. But the good news is, it's not your battle. It's the Lord's. You don't have to fight; just show up. God's victories are waiting for you to claim, but he's waiting to see you exercise faith even before you see the victory."Take heart," Jesus said. We have hope; we have a future; we have his presence and power. We are not alone or desolate. Take heart. I pray you will be able to defeat discouragement in your life.
Are you discouraged? If so, don't feel guilty about it, but don't wallow in it either. It's not a fun place to be. I examine some biblical ways to defeat discouragement.Encourage othersOne way to cure your own discouragement is to encourage others. Proverbs 11:25 says, ...he who refreshes others will himself be refreshed. Instead of looking for someone to pick you up, look around and see who you can encourage. Thank goodness we can be encouragers even when we feel discouraged. And as we become encouragers to others, our own discouragement is lessened.Get to workOne good cure for discouragement is simply to get to work. Often when we're discouraged, we're unmotivated, so we do nothing. Then because we've gotten nothing done, we feel guilty, and that makes it even harder for us to get something done. Remember, you begin with the first step, so when discouragement seems to be overtaking you, find something that needs to be done. Then start doing it.Get some restOf course, you may be discouraged because you've been going too hard and too long, and your body simply needs a rest. Elijah discovered how vulnerable he was to discouragement when he was physically exhausted, so God put him in a spot where he could recuperate and be refreshed with food and sleep. If your body is constantly on the verge of exhaustion, you can't expect to avoid discouragement.Ignore the discouragers around youAre there people around you who are discouraging you with their negativity? Are you listening to others more than you are listening to God? Remember when Jairus pleaded with Jesus to come and heal his little daughter? On the way to Jairus' house some men came from his house and said, "Don't bother coming—she's dead already.” But we read in Mark 5, ignoring what they said, Jesus told the synagogue ruler, “Don't be afraid; just believe.”Others will discourage you if you allow them to. You must learn to listen to Jesus and tune out—ignore—the people who would discourage you. Tune them out; avoid them where possible; change the subject—whatever you must do—but don't let negative people discourage you. Don't catch their disease. Think about what is true, noble, right, pure, lovely and admirable—the good reports, not the bad ones.Remember, being discouraged is not a sin, but refusing to take steps out of discouragement is. These biblical principles will work if you practice them.
If you've been discouraged lately, you've probably also felt guilty about being discouraged. But it's good to remember everyone goes through periods of discouragement. I think it's important to emphasize being discouraged is not a sin. God uses people who are discouraged; God understands discouragement; discouragement is a normal and unavoidable emotion we must all deal with. It comes to us in different ways, for different reasons, and at different times, but none of us escape discouragement.However, wallowing in discouragement—that's a different story. Jesus warned us, In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! He said, "I have overcome the world” (John 16:33).Discouragement becomes sinful when we refuse to take heart, as Jesus told us to do.What does it mean to take heart? I think we can learn from David, who often fought discouragement. In Psalm 42, David says, My tears have been my food day and night. David is obviously discouraged. He continues, My soul is downcast within me. I say to God my Rock, “Why have you forgotten me?”Identify the discouragementDavid begins to defeat his discouragement by identifying it to the Lord. No need to put on a face and act like everything's okay. Until you get it out in the open and call it what it is, it will just continue to fester underneath. David is open and honest with the Lord, and he says just what he feels. We need to do the same thing. But note David talked to the Lord about his problems; that's the way we should do it rather than dumping it on others.Talk encouragingly to yourselfBut he doesn't stop there. After identifying his discouragement, David talks to himself and says, "Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.” In the space of eleven verses, David repeats these words to himself three times. He keeps on reminding himself of who God is and who he belongs to.What do you say to yourself when you are discouraged? More discouraging words? That's what most of us do, and we make a major mistake. Sure, you need to pour it all out, but once you get it said, then start saying the right things to yourself. Give a sacrifice of praise—praising when you don't feel it or you don't even want to.One great way to do this is to start reciting all you have to be thankful for—out loud if possible. Sometimes I use the alphabet praise method—finding something about God to thank him for with each letter of the alphabet. It's a great cure for discouragement.
When you're having a problem or a struggle, doesn't it help to know others have faced the same situations? David, Elijah, and Hannah were discouraged. Here are some other discouraged people in the Bible.4. NaomiNaomi was discouraged because of financial difficulties and terrible loss. Her husband and two sons had both died, and she was left penniless and homeless. "Don't call me Naomi," she told her friends. "Call me Mara (meaning bitter), because the Almighty has made my life very bitter…” (Ruth 1:20-21). It's easy enough to understand her discouragement. Financial difficulties cause a great deal of discouragement for many of us.5. Mary and MarthaMary and Martha were discouraged because they lost someone they loved, and they had really expected Jesus to save him. After all, Jesus had been healing all kinds of other people; surely, he would come and save his beloved friend, Lazarus, they reasoned. And when he didn't, they were very discouraged; Jesus had disappointed them. "Lord," Martha said to Jesus, "if you had been here, my brother would not have died" (John 11:21).Have you ever set an agenda out for the Lord, expecting him to work on your timetable, and then been disappointed when he didn't come through? That can be discouraging.6. PeterPeter was discouraged because of his own failure. After he denied the Lord three times, Peter went out and wept bitterly, we are told. I imagine he felt he had blown it for good, and he must have been terribly discouraged with himself. How could he deny the Lord, the one he promised never to deny?When I look at myself and see how inadequate I am, how often I fail, how I go back and do the same things over and over I know I shouldn't do, I get very discouraged. In fact, that discourages me probably more than anything else, how about you?7. JesusEven Jesus fought discouragement when his friends failed him; when he was misunderstood; when he tried to help, and his help was refused. That really hurts when you have totally good motives, and yet people don't approve or understand or support you. In fact, they may reject you, as they did Jesus. Easy to be discouraged then.Well, it is encouraging to see even these great people of God went through times of discouragement. But now we want to know how they learned to defeat it.
Do you get discouraged? The answer has to be "yes.” If you aren't now, you have been. If you haven't been, you will be. None of us go through life without periods of discouragement. Let’s examine practical ways we can defeat discouragement.Did you realize the Bible is full of discouraged people? Let's think about some of the reasons they were discouraged, because they're very similar to the things that discourage us. DavidOh, that I had wings of a dove! David wrote; I would fly away and be at rest…I would hurry to my place of shelter, far from the tempest and storm (Psalm 55:5-6:8). David was discouraged because of an enemy who was jealous of him and trying to destroy him.Do you have some people in your life who are consciously trying to do you harm? Are there some people close to you who are jealous or mean or vindictive? That can be very discouraging. ElijahElijah was discouraged because of exhaustion. After a great spiritual victory, when he called down fire from heaven and destroyed all the prophets of Baal, one little woman scared him to death because she threatened to kill him. And he was ready to give up. "I have had enough, Lord," he said. "Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors” (1 Kings 19:4).I find I am often discouraged after spiritual victories. How about you? Do you often find yourself discouraged just when God has done something wonderful in your life? It's not unusual. HannahHannah was discouraged because the deepest desire of her heart had not been given to her. And it was a good and worthy desire—to have a baby she could give back to the Lord. Downhearted and discouraged, in bitterness of soul Hannah wept much and prayed to the Lord for a baby (1 Samuel 1).Some of you are discouraged because of unfulfilled desires. Maybe it's the desire to be married, but the right person hasn't come along. Maybe, like Hannah, it's the desire to have a baby, but your womb has been closed so far. Maybe it's your dreams of serving God in some special way, but the door hasn't opened yet. It can be discouraging.We can certainly see discouragement is nothing new; it's been around since the beginning of time.
The Old Testament gives us the history of God’s people, the Israelites, before the coming of their long-awaited Messiah, Jesus Christ. And throughout their history they had good times and bad times—times when they obeyed God and times when they went far astray. Eventually, they split into two nations, Israel and Judah, with ten of the tribes forming the Israel nation and two forming the nation of Judah.I want to focus your attention to one of the most wonderful chapters in the Bible, in my opinion, 2 Chronicles 20, which tells us about Jehoshaphat, king of Judah. Jehoshaphat was one of the godly kings who obeyed the Lord and led his people to follow Yahweh. But they were a small nation, not well fortified, and therefore very vulnerable to their enemies.In chapter 20 of 2 Chronicles, Jehoshaphat finds himself and his nation in a truly frightening predicament. Here are the first four verses of that chapter:After this, the Moabites and Ammonites with some of the Meunites came to make war on Jehoshaphat. Some men came and told Jehoshaphat, "A vast army is coming against you from Edom, from the other side of the Seas. It is already in En Gedi.” Alarmed, Jehoshaphat resolved to inquire of the Lord, and he proclaimed a fast for all Judah. The people of Judah came together to seek help from the Lord; indeed, they came from every town in Judah to seek him.Jehoshaphat is faced with a grave dilemma. His entire army and his entire country could be wiped out by this enemy army. And he is alarmed. Who wouldn't be? But notice what Jehoshaphat does in his alarmed condition: He resolves to inquire of the Lord.He could have inquired of his political advisers. They would have undoubtedly told him to try to make a peace treaty with this vast enemy and save their necks, even if it meant giving up the land. He could have inquired of his military advisers, who would have told him to retreat and get out as fast as possible, because there was no way they could defeat this great military army coming against them. But Jehoshaphat didn't inquire of people or counselors or advisers. He inquired of the Lord.Where have you been running for answers as you face your impossible situation? Is the Lord the first one you turn to? Amazing how often we do everything else except inquire of the Lord.This should be the first thing we do when we don’t know what to do: Inquire of the Lord. Notice that Jehoshaphat resolved to inquire of the Lord; he set his will to do it. I can imagine his feelings were taking him in different directions. I can believe he wanted to start running fast and take some kind of action immediately. But he knew he would only find answers by inquiring of the Lord, so whether he felt like it or not, he resolved to do that.Many times, we run with our emotions when we're up against impossibilities. And our emotions take us to hasty action, to running away, to seeking advice from the wrong people, etc. If we would first inquire of the Lord, sit down with his Word and ask for direction, spend time in prayer to listen to his voice, we would find the answers we need.I remember at one point in my life, many years ago now, when I was suddenly faced with what seemed at the time to be a potentially disastrous situation, and I truly didn’t know what to do. So, what did I do? I picked up the phone to call my best friend and ask her what to do! Now, there’s nothing wrong with seeking godly advice from trusted advisors, but that’s not the first place we should go, is it? Well, wouldn’t you know she wasn’t there. This was long before we all had cell phones, and so I couldn’t reach her. I just kept redialing and redialing her number, pacing the floor, and becoming angry with her for not being there when I needed her.It was one of those teaching moments in my life, when I could hear the voice of God in my head clearly saying to me, “Why would you call her before you call me?
Presented by Lauren StibgenAs we wrap up talking about some of the worldly ways we try to calm our anxiety that typically don’t work, I want to address the fine line of talking it out with a friend verses gossip. I admit, sometimes talking to a close friend about something that is causing anxiety is helpful. Do you ever feel like this verse:Do not be misled: Bad company corrupts good character (1 Corinthians 15:33).These days I am very selective about who I seek counsel from. First and foremost, I look for fellow Christ-followers. I saw a note today that said, “The best kind of friend is a praying friend.” Seeking this kind of community is essential to keeping us close to our peacekeeper Jesus.After all, the bible tells us that,The way of fools seems right to them, but the wise listen to advice (Proverbs 12:15).I want to be sure the advice I am seeking from others is based in biblical truth. Proverbs 15:22 states Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.I have spent time focusing on how to build this bench of advisers and dear friends I can count on when I need an ear.Carefully discerning how I work through some of the things that cause anxiety can also be important. I want to be mindful that my talk doesn’t turn into gossip. Shared friends and relationships can sometimes lead to hurt feelings. If I am ever needing advice within a shared friend group, I always make sure I am seeking it outside of that group of friends. When you find yourself naming names and bringing up things that maybe aren’t kind, make sure your intentions are headed in the right direction. Are you talking about it just to vent or gossip, or are you seeking wise counsel to help you work through this stressor?Back to that phrase, “The best kind of friend is a praying friend.” Another one you may have heard is, “Have you prayed about it as much as you have talked about it.”Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God (Philippians 4:6).Having a confidant to pray with you about what is making you anxious can surely be a help.
Presented by Lauren StibgenMedia that we take with us anytime and anywhere is causing anxiety. The dings for emails, texts, and calls can make it hard to shut off and unplug. But what about when you are using social media to try to reduce stress and anxiety.Is it the next binge-worthy show? Is it reels on Facebook or Instagram? While social media can help reduce anxiety by providing people with an outlet to connect, it can also cause further anxiety by causing active comparisons to others or a need to engage constantly because of a fear of missing out on what others are doing. Watching cute videos of animals or some fun comedy can surely make me laugh, and I know laughter is one way I can reduce my stress levels. Noted benefits of laughter are relaxing the body, boosting the immune system, triggering the release of endorphins, protecting the heart, and burning calories. And God loves us to laugh!Our mouths were filled with laughter, our tongues with songs of joy (Psalm 126: 2).I have spent some time talking about the pros and cons of social media and faith. Overall, the access people have to resources like the Bible or faith-based media at their fingertips is a good thing. There are countless ways to access aggregated sermons and to look up Bible verses quickly. In fact, when you look up Bible verses for anxiety, one of the results that pops up is 30 encouraging Bible verses to overcome worry and anxiety. This is helpful!I would say engaging in faith-based media and resources on your mobile device can be stress and anxiety reducing because it is drawing you closer to your ultimate peacekeeper—Jesus!The challenge is staying on this path and avoiding the countless other distractions like texts, email dings, what so and so has posted about their vacation, or even worse, commenting on something out of haste or reaction. Sometimes the thing that causes us anxiety is what someone is posting on social media. In haste and anxiety, you may be tempted to reply. Can I encourage you to hit the pause button?You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you. Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord, the Lord himself, is the Rock eternal (Isaiah 26:3-4).Keep your mind on the Lord, and he will give you perfect peace.
Presented by Lauren StibgenDoes the busyness of your daily life make you feel like you should just get away? Perhaps it’s a weekend away with friends or with your spouse. You want to recharge from the anxiety you feel in the daily grind of work and home.I wasn’t sure, but I had a hunch there would be articles about vacation anxiety. I was right. While the benefits of getting away include lowering stress, improving heart health, boosting creativity, strengthening relationships and keeping you healthy, it seems we need more rules of the road to take a good vacation these days.Taking this time away can add anxiety—financial, the care of your children or pets, leaving projects at work, and countless others. The truth is none of the things that cause you daily anxiety will disappear. They will be there when you come back.How can you incorporate the ultimate peace into your getaway, so it isn’t just a runaway from your daily stress and anxiety? You know what I mean. How can you include Jesus in this time? How can you draw closer to Jesus in faith?Jesus is a proponent of getting away.“Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.” So they went away by themselves in a boat to a solitary place (Mark 6:31-32).You know the feeling of coming and going—days of no leisure and nothing to eat! We have all had these days.Knowing Jesus invited his disciples to recharge, you can be encouraged he wants this for you too. Be mindful of how you consider this time. It isn’t an escape, but it can be a time to rest and be in God’s Word. If you are spending the time to get away, make sure it is time spent reconnecting with your peace, Jesus.The only real escape for us in this world is Jesus. Abiding with Christ can give us a foretaste of the glory we will have in heaven. We know in heaven Jesus has prepared a space for us, and the Father’s house has many rooms. One of the descriptors I love is in Revelation 4:6.… in front of the throne there was what looked like a sea of glass, clear as crystal (Revelation 4:6).If you have ever been near still and serene water, you will know why this is so striking. It feels so calm. I am in awe knowing heaven has a sea of glass that I can enjoy for eternity.
Presented by Lauren StibgenWhat do you turn to during times of stress? Some of the most common outlets for stress and anxiety in our world are related to addictions. These addictions can quickly become idols and can keep us further away from our true peace: Jesus Christ.You know the addictions you or other struggle with—stress eating or drowning our sorrows in a glass of wine, a cocktail, you name it. Food and alcohol rank in the top of legal addictive substances. With work, access to these habits can increase. Maybe it is a consistent happy hour after work or meals with colleagues and customers. However, our long days, filled with anxieties, can be enough to drive us to these habits even when we are not engaging in them because of work. Culture has taught us that alcohol can help us have a good time and unwind from a long week. Food has become a little more taboo with the diet culture, but eating fast food with low nutrition value can seem easy when you are balancing work and life.Did you know alcohol can actually increase your levels of anxiety? There is research to read, but if you find yourself in a pattern of consuming alcohol to reduce anxiety, you are not doing yourself any favors. Considering the other health issues that can come from excessive drinking including cancer, you may want to reconsider this as a peace-giving habit.Stress eating can also cause health issues including weight gain.None of this is peaceful and life giving. Advice about food and alcohol in the Bible is mixed, but one thing is for sure. Anything that is a stumbling block or an idol standing in your way to your relationship with our ultimate peace—Jesus—is not a good thing!Do not join those who drink too much wine or gorge themselves on meat, for drunkards and gluttons become poor, and drowsiness clothes them in rags (Proverbs 23: 20-21).We must also be sober minded. 1 Peter 5:8 exhorts us to be watchful for the devil that prowls around like a roaring lion.Talk about a peace stealer. Satan is the ultimate stealer of peace! If you and I are walking around salving our anxiety with alcohol, we will be prone to the attacks of the devil. My prayer today is that you rethink these habits and turn to Jesus!
Presented by Lauren StibgenWork is only one element of our life that can bring stress. Marriage, children, family, health issues, and anything else we add into the mix of our days can make us anxious too.Honestly, thinking about how to find peace from all of this can be yet one more thing we add to our mix. Is seeking fleeting peace only adding to your anxiety?We can feel anxiety as we are waiting for this elusive moment for peace. Maybe you have even tried to plan it out. We experience anxiety in our waiting when our perceived outcome doesn’t happen within the perceived time we have set in our mind. If you have blocked out a time for peace on your calendar each day and it keeps getting run over by life, I can imagine this can make you more anxious!I have felt all of this. In fact, there was a large part of my professional and mom life that I told my husband I felt like I was wearing a high heel and a gym shoe at the same time. Try walking like this—a heel on one foot and a gym shoe on another—unbalanced, kind of messy, out of sorts! I was consumed by so many things and not turning to where I truly could find the peace I needed: Jesus.Jesus promises us trouble here in this world. He knows we will be experiencing the feelings of being consumed, out of balance.I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace (John 16:33).Jesus is clear. In him I can have peace. I know this sounds silly, but when I think of the peace of Jesus that gives rest, I think of my most comfortable, fluffy house slippers. I am not fancy; I am not running anywhere. I am keeping a slow pace and finding rest.Too often we are trying to plan our own peace when we need to be turning to Jesus. While some of the ways we seek peace in this world aren’t “bad,” they will never be a complete salve for the anxiety we feel.
Presented by Lauren StibgenI love to learn. In fact, learning is one of the things I do best. Relying on God’s Word as my guide in all aspects of my life means that, as a Christ follower I should always be discerning about the world’s advice no matter how good it seems! With the Bible as my guide, I am always keen to get advice about things in business!Don’t get me wrong, there are many experts I trust who are not believers in Jesus Christ, but when it comes to something truly personal, like the term inner peace, my guard comes up.What is inner peace? For sake of ease, let’s go with the Wikipedia version—a deliberate state of psychological or spiritual calm despite the potential presence of stressors.There are many more technical versions of this definition from research articles, but all of them seem to reference the same spiritual calm and religious aspect of this sometimes-elusive state of being. Some of the other words and phrases associated with inner peace are: Tranquility of mind No sufferings or mental disturbances like worry or anxiety, greed, hatred, ill-will To keep strong in the state of stress[1]Luke 12:15 warns: Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; life does not consist in an abundance of possessions.1 Timothy 6:10a: For the love of money is the root of all kinds of evil.1 John 2:9 exhorts: Anyone that claims to be I the light but hates a brother or sister is still in the darkness.Proverbs 10:12: Hatred stirs up conflict, but love covers all wrongs.Here’s what our culture gets right. Inner peace is, in fact, spiritual. For those of us who have accepted Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior, we know Jesus is that peace.I also find it interesting that some of the words above greed, hatred, and ill-will are exactly the things we, as Christ followers are commanded not to do. In fact, they are considered sinful. In the verses above, the Bible tells us we should guard against greed; it is the root of all kinds of evil. Hatred of another person means you are still in darkness, and it stirs up conflict. None of this sounds peaceful to me.Now, since so many people are seeking this inner peace, how do we get it? Out of three separate articles I read, the top three reoccurring ways to “find inner peace” include: meditation, nature, and practicing gratitude.First, what is meditation. We hear about this a lot. Books, apps, and classes tout meditation as a way to reduce anxiety and get better sleep. Most of these resources use reflective thinking, some breathing exercises, and practices to help declutter your mind and be present in the moment. We can already see the issue of this for those of us who follow Jesus Christ. This method is devoid of a Savior who is our peace.The Bible does suggest meditation. In Joshua 1:8 we read, Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful. We are also instructed to meditate on God’s unfailing love, on his work and mighty deeds, on his precepts and ways, and on his promises. All these instructions are found in the Psalms.So, the world tells you to declutter and clear your mind, but when you stop meditation, what creeps right back in? You guessed it—the same things that were there before! The difference with God’s instruction about meditation is clear. You are to think about his laws, his unfailing love, his ways, and his promises.This is peaceful. The verse in Joshua also tells us to do this day and night which highlights the importance of the frequency of filling our mind with the Word and the wonderful ways of the Lord!So, how can you do this? I suggest several things. First, start and end your day in the Word of the Lord. There is a wonderful devotional by Charles H. Spurgeon titled Morning and Evening that offers a devotional—you guessed it—in the morning and evening...
Through our on-going story of Fran, we’ve been talking about the topic of clinical depression. Fran has encouraged her good friend, Louise, to seek medical help for her depressed state of mind, and Louise is now beginning to take a prescribed drug to see if indeed it will help her to emerge from this depression.The next day Fran is talking with her doctor friend at church, Anne. “I sure hope this helps Louise,” she says. “But what if it doesn’t?”“Well, Fran, if Louise has other issues, such as sin in her life, medication won’t fix it. But you indicated that you don’t know of any existing problem like that, so it could be that this medication can help her get herself back, if you know what I mean.”“Oh, that would be wonderful,” Fran says.“But remember, sometimes the doctors have to try several different kinds of medication before they find the right one,” Anne reminds her.“Yes, that’s what Dr. Monroe warned us about yesterday,” Fran says. “And she highly recommended that Louise also go for some counseling as well. I think that bothered Louise. What do you think?”“Well, rarely are these depressions caused solely by physical reasons. It’s usually a combination of stress or perfectionism or workaholism along with a chemical imbalance,” Anne informs her. “So, I would concur that Louise should see a Christian counselor, at least to make sure she’s not living in denial about other areas that could be contributing to her problem.”“I’m going to encourage her to do that,” Fran says. “And I’m going to encourage her to spend even more time in the Bible and prayer. She says it has been very difficult to read her Bible or pray since this depression hit her.”“That’s a typical reaction, Fran, and I’m sure the enemy of our soul moves in at times like these to make matters worse,” Anne says.“Well, I’m going to pray for her more and pray with her more. At least I can do that for her, while she’s finding it difficult to pray herself,” Fran says.With a good friend like Fran, Louise will have the support she needs to help her recover from this depression. All of us need to be more sensitive and aware of the needs of others who may be going through something like this. It’s a time to gather around that person and help them, not abandon them.
If you’ve ever gone through a depression, whether long or short term, you can empathize with Louise, Fran’s friend. In our on-going story of Fran and Jesus on the Job, Fran is trying to help Louise, a fellow believer on her job, who has been going through a serious depressed state for reasons unknown. Fran has made an appointment for her with a well-recommended doctor and is taking her there this afternoon.Louise doesn’t talk the whole way to the doctor’s office and Fran decides it’s no time for small talk, so she just prays silently for her while she is driving. As they arrive, Louise is reluctant to get out of the car. “It won’t do any good, Fran,” she says. “I’m just wasting your time and my money.”Fran gently takes her arm and helps her out of the car. “Don’t worry about that; it’s worth a try, Louise.” And so, slowly, Louise walks with Fran into the doctor’s office. When her name is called, Louise can barely lift herself out of the chair. With Fran’s help she goes into the doctor’s office. “Why don’t you stay with her,” Doctor Monroe suggests, seeing how frightened Louise is.Louise grabs her hand, “Yes, Fran, please stay.” So, she sits down.“How can I help you, Louise?” the doctor asks.“I don’t think you can,” she replies, “but Fran thought I should find out if my problem is physical.” And with that Louise begins slowly to tell the doctor of her experience with depression over the past few weeks.“Louise,” the doctor responds, “what you have described sounds like a textbook case of clinical depression. That means that it is likely to have a physical connection, and medication may be able to help you.”“I don’t know about taking medication,” Louise says. “That scares me. Sounds like I should be admitted to a mental institution or something.”“Oh, no,” the doctor assures her, “no, Louise, it just means we need to find out if this sudden depression has a physical cause. I see many people with similar symptoms, Louise, and many times some medication is able to get them back to a somewhat normal state so they can begin to work on other issues that may be contributing to their feelings. If you had any other kind of physical imbalance, you would have no qualms about receiving some medication for it, and if these symptoms are caused by a physical imbalance, then why not take some medicine for them as well?”After more discussion, Louise agrees to the doctor’s suggestion and leaves there with a prescription.Clinical depression is a problem many people face—yes, even Christians. And we need to be informed about how best to help those who suffer from these bouts of depression.
Listen to the words of King David:My heart is in anguish within me; the terrors of death assail me. Fear and trembling have beset me; horror has overwhelmed me. I said, ‘Oh that I had the wings of a dove! I would fly away and be at rest. I would flee far away and stay in the desert…’ (Psalm 55:4-7).Would you describe those as the words of a man in depression? Let’s continue the story of Fran and Jesus on the Job.Fran’s friend, Louise, has been feeling depressed for the past month or so, but she has kept it inside and not told anyone because she was ashamed to admit it. Fran has reassured her even Christians can be depressed.She says to her, “You’ve heard the name Charles Spurgeon, Louise? He was a great preacher in England, the prince of preachers they called him. And he fought feelings of depression all of his life.”“Really?” Louise says. “I figured a strong Christian would never be depressed.”“Well, that’s just a wrong notion, so are you willing to go see a doctor?” she asks.“I’m ready for some help, Fran,” Louise says. “I just can’t go on this way much longer. I can hardly get out of bed each morning; and I know I’m going to get fired if I don’t concentrate better at work. But I just don’t care about anything anymore—except going home and locking the doors against the world.”Fran calls a woman at her church who is a doctor and asks her for a recommendation for Louise. The next day at work she gives the name and number to Louise. “Here’s a doctor I can recommend for you, Louise. All you have to do is call and make an appointment.”But somehow Fran can sense even making a phone call is too much for Louise. She looks dejected and lifeless today. “Hey, better still, let me call and make an appointment for you, okay?” And with that, she dials the number and asks if the doctor has any cancellations today. Sure enough, she is able to make Louise an appointment late in the afternoon.“Would you like me to go with you, Louise?” Fran asks. Louise doesn’t answer. “I will go with you. In fact, I’ll drive you. We need to leave here about 4:00. I’ll come by and pick you up.” Louise doesn’t object.All through the day Fran prays for Louise and for the doctor to have wisdom in helping her. It breaks her heart to see her good friend in such a condition.Do you know someone in a depressed state? There can be causes beyond his or her control, and that person needs your friendship right now.
Mental health professionals tell us depression can be a result of an emotional or psychological problem, or it can have a physical connection. Our friend, Fran, has just learned her best friend at work, Louise, is going through some severe depression, which is affecting her behavior quite noticeably.Fran finally confronted Louise, and she admitted she feels depressed but wouldn’t talk about it any further. Tonight, after getting her kids ready for bed, Fran finally has time to make an uninterrupted call to Louise. She gets her home phone voicemail. “Louise, it’s me, and I really want to talk with you. Please, if you’re there, pick up.”After a long pause, Louise picks up the phone. “Hi, Fran. Thank you for calling; I know you’re concerned, but really there’s nothing you can do. I’m just going through a depression, I guess. I’m sure it’s my fault. I need to get right with the Lord or something.”“Wait a minute, Louise,” Fran says. “Where did you get this idea that depression is always an indication of a spiritual problem? Don’t you know it could be a chemical imbalance or something physical? Have you seen a doctor?”“No,” Louise continues, “but I talked with one of the pastors at church. He seemed to think that all I needed was to read my Bible and pray more.”“Well, there’s nothing wrong with that, but is he a health professional?” Fran asks.“No, no,” Louise replies.“Louise, you need to see a doctor and find out if there is some physical reason for your depression,” Fran encourages her.Louise begins to cry. “Oh, Fran, I can’t tell you how awful I feel. I can’t sleep at night; I can’t concentrate at work. Sometimes I feel lightheaded, and my heart starts pounding. And I cry at the drop of a hat; I even cried at the office today in front of Andy. He thinks I’m crazy, I’m sure.”“Oh, Louise,” Fran says, “I’m so sorry. Why didn’t you tell me about this sooner? How long have you been feeling this way?”“It started about a month ago, but I just figured it would pass. And I felt guilty because Christians aren’t supposed to be depressed, right?” Louise says.“That’s ridiculous, Louise. Think of people in the Bible who showed signs of depression. There’s David singing the blues in the Psalms. And Job certainly was depressed. And what about Elijah? He wanted to die. Moses was so depressed he ran away for forty years. Louise, you need to find out what is causing you to feel this way, and maybe a doctor could help you,” Fran says.
Is depression an indication of sin in a believer’s life? I think many Christians struggle with how to deal with depression, their own and other’s. In fact, our friend, Fran, faces that situation as we catch up with what’s been happening in her life.If you’ve been reading these devotionals a long time, you know I periodically tell this on-going story of a fictional workplace woman named Fran who is in the process of learning to be aware of the truth that Jesus is with her at all times, even at work.Fran has a very good friend where she works, Louise, who is also a believer, and they meet each week to pray for their company and coworkers. Over the years, they have seen God answer many prayers. But lately Fran has noticed Louise is just not herself. In fact, for the past two weeks she has canceled their prayer time with what seemed like last minute flimsy excuses. It has Fran baffled really, because it just isn’t like Louise. She can sense Louise is backing away from her.Fran has been talking to Jesus about this situation. “Lord,” she says, “I’m puzzled as to what is wrong with Louise. Have I offended her in some way? Have I failed to be the friend she needs? Lord, please show me what I am supposed to do; make me aware of any hidden errors on my part; give me wisdom to be a good friend to Louise as she has been to me so many times.”After much prayer Fran finally decides she needs to say something to Louise. She prays about what to say and when, and the next day at work she catches her just as she’s leaving for the day.“Oh, Louise, I’m so glad I caught you now. I just have to know if I have done anything to offend you. Please tell me because I can sense something is wrong, and I just don’t know what to do.” Fran looks at her and realizes Louise has begun to softly cry. “Oh, my,” Fran says, “I have done something, haven’t I?”Quietly Louise replies, “No, no, Fran, it’s not you. I don’t know what it is. I’m just…just…depressed, I guess.” And with those words, Louise runs out of the building to the parking lot and drives away without giving Fran a chance to respond.“Depressed?” Fran thinks. “Why is Louise depressed?”
If you're like me, you want answers. I don't like unanswered questions, do you? I don't like loose ends and unfinished business. Yet, life is full of them.Maybe you are right now in the midst of some situation for which you can find no answer. God is silent. The heavens are like stone. You've begged for explanations, but none have come. What do we do when there are no answers?Mary and Martha faced that dilemma when Lazarus died. You know the story. They sent for Jesus to come and heal Lazarus. They were confident Jesus could heal him and prevent his death, and that he would do so, for they knew how Jesus loved Lazarus and them.They sent out their cry for help, but we read in John 11:6 that ...when Jesus heard that Lazarus was sick, he stayed where he was two more days. He loved them, but he didn't come to their rescue. Why? I can see Martha and Mary waiting by the side of their sick brother, expecting Jesus to walk through the door any minute. They knew he could have been there shortly, but as hour by hour and day by day passed, Jesus didn't show up. And Lazarus got worse and worse, and they watched him die.Do you think they wondered if Jesus really loved them during that time? Don't you imagine they must have felt abandoned and forsaken by Jesus, to realize he could have come and healed their brother, but he chose not to? Have you felt that way? I think we all go through similar reactions when there are no answers.When Jesus finally arrived, it was too late; Lazarus was already dead. Martha was upset with Jesus, and we read her words to him in John 11:21, "Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.” She asked him for an answer to her question: Why didn't you come, Lord?I find Jesus' words to her very interesting. He did not defend his actions; he did not say, "Martha, let me explain exactly what I did and why.” No, when Martha was looking for answers to her unanswered question, Jesus took her back to basics.Jesus said to her, "I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?” (John 11:25-26). He confronted Martha with the reality of who he was and caused her to change her thinking.You see, if Martha believed that Jesus was the resurrection and the life and that because Lazarus had believed in him, Lazarus would live forever, then this temporary separation would look very differently to Martha. Jesus wanted her to think beyond the immediate and look at the eternal. He wanted her to think about who he was and what kind of power he had. And she confessed out loud, Yes, Lord, I believe that you are the Christ, the Son of God, who was to come into the world (John 11:27).When you don't have answers, stop and ask a different question: Who do you believe Jesus is? Do you believe he is the resurrection and the life? If so, confess out loud exactly what you believe about the person of Jesus. It's important that you say it out loud, I think, so you can hear your own confession of faith.We may never know some of the answers we're looking for on this side of heaven, but we can always confidently know the answer to the question: Who do you think Jesus is? By concentrating your thoughts on who he is, you will have the peace and strength you need for those unanswered questions. If that was the question Jesus asked Martha when she wanted answers, then surely it is the starting place for us today when we want answers.We all remember the end of this story; Jesus did meet their need by performing an incredible miracle and raising Lazarus from the dead. In this case, Mary and Martha finally got answers, as they saw their brother come forth after four days in that tomb. And that miracle was the talk of the town for days and weeks, as you can imagine. As a matter of fact, many people believed in Jesus when they saw and heard about Lazarus.So,
Worrying is worthless! You probably know that already, but the question is, have you stopped worrying? Jesus told us clearly “Do not worry.” It wasn’t a suggestion; it was a directive. Yet often we fall into that easy trap of worrying. We’ve been looking at Matthew 6 to see three reasons not to worry, and now we close with three ways to stop worrying. First, I examined the importance of replacing worrying thoughts with thoughts of how your Heavenly Father takes care of you.Secondly, we stop worrying by placing our faith firmly in our Heavenly Father. In Matthew 6, Jesus told his disciples their problem is they have little faith. “O ye of little faith,” he said to them—and I think he must say it to us as well. How do you have more faith? The Bible says faith comes by hearing and hearing by the Word of God. If you’re worrying a lot, it could be because you’re not spending enough time in the Word of God, and therefore your faith is weak.When I have some concern on my mind that starts to become a worry, God will minister to me if I just sit down and read his Word. But if I don’t do that, the worrying just gets worse.Then, the third thing we must do in order to stop worrying is seek first his kingdom and his righteousness as Jesus told us in Matthew 6:33. Worry is an indication that somehow we’ve got our priorities confused. If we seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, if that is our number one priority, then it will drive out worry.Worry is like the check engine light in your car. You know when that light goes on something is wrong with your car, and you need to have it checked out. When you and I are worrying, it’s a warning light that something is wrong with us spiritually. Either we’ve forgotten who we are in Christ and how our Heavenly Father has promised to take care of us, our faith is very weak, we’ve not spent enough time in the Word of God, or we’re not truly seeking first God’s kingdom. Other things, other people, other activities have taken first place in our lives.Remember, worrying is worthless—a total waste of your time—and it indicates you need to stop and check out why your worrying instead of trusting the Sovereign God, who is your Heavenly Father.
I remember a song we sang when I was young: Why worry when you can pray? Well, it’s a good question, isn’t it? Why do we worry when Jesus has clearly told us not to worry? Worrying is truly worthless!We’ve looked at three reasons we should not worry from Matthew 6. They are: Because of who we are. We are more valuable than birds. Because it never does any good. Because it’s a bad testimony.Now we’re looking at three ways to stop worrying. We can stop worrying when we think about how our Heavenly Father takes care of us. I want to emphasize again our problem with worrying is in our thoughts. Worrying takes place in your mind, and in 2 Corinthians 10:5 we read we are to take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.The battle is in your mind, and you stop worrying when you change your thought patterns. I’ve written a whole book on this topic—Think About What You Think About—because I believe most of our problems begin with wrong thinking. It’s certainly true in my life; as soon as I allow my thoughts to get out of control, to think about things I should not be thinking about, that’s when worrying moves in and I become a worrywart, as we say!Philippians 4:8 says we are to think about what is true, noble, right, pure, lovely admirable, excellent and praiseworthy. When you’re worrying, it is often not true, certainly not noble, never admirable or excellent or praiseworthy. We need to stop worrying. And you do that by replacing wrong thoughts with right ones.When you find yourself in worry mode, stop and intentionally change your thoughts, replacing those worrying thoughts with how your Heavenly Father has promised to take care of you, to never leave you or forsake how, and how he loves you and cherishes you. It may only last for a few minutes before you start worrying again, but if you simply keep replacing wrong thoughts with right ones, soon you will build spiritual muscle. You’ll discover you’re not worrying nearly as much as you used to.Please remember: Worrying is a useless and worthless activity. And you have the power, through Jesus Christ, to be rid of it.
My dictionary defines worry as “to feel uneasy or anxious; fret; torment oneself with or suffer from disturbing thoughts.” Did you ever realize when you worry, you are inflicting torment on yourself? Worry is self-inflicted suffering, and it never produces anything good.We’ve looked at three reasons Jesus gave for not worrying: First, because of who you are as a child of God. Second, because it never does any good, and third, because it is a poor testimony to those around you who observe you worrying. Now, we’ll see how we can stop worrying.Worry is a function of your mind, your thoughts. In order to stop worrying, you have to change your thought patterns. And in order to change your thought patterns, you have to replace wrong thoughts with right thoughts. Here is the thought that can stop you from worrying: You have a heavenly Father who is taking care of you.Jesus said in Matthew 6 our Heavenly Father knows what we need and will provide for our needs when we seek first his kingdom and his righteousness. Now, this may cause you to ask some questions, like why doesn’t God answer all my prayers if he is taking care of me? That’s what we expect a father to do, right? I think of my own father, and I am certain if he could meet any need I had, he would, and he often did.It often seems like our earthly father is more predictable than our Heavenly Father. Most earthly fathers can be counted on to do anything they can for their children. Yet often our Heavenly Father doesn’t come through for us the way we think he should, or the way we want him to. Does he love us less than our earthly father? Why doesn’t he act like my earthly father would?Well, it’s quite simple. He has a different agenda for us than our earthly fathers. He has an eternal agenda, and his purpose is to conform us to the image of Jesus Christ. This daily transformation often comes through unexpected—and unwanted—ways.Spurgeon, a great preacher of the 19th Century, wrote: “O blessed acts of sorrow that cut a pathway to our God by chopping down the tall trees of human comfort.” Even when you’re in the midst of difficulty and you don’t see how God is taking care of you, you should not worry, because he is working everything out for your good.In all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose (Rom. 8:28).
What is it right now you are worrying about? I’m reminding you—and me—of how useless and worthless it is to worry, as Jesus clearly told us in Matthew 6. Whatever you are worrying about at this moment is a total waste of time.Jesus gave us three reasons not to worry. First, we should not worry because of who we are—we are far more valuable than the birds, and God takes care of the birds. As believers in Jesus Christ, we are protected by our Heavenly Father, and he provides for our needs. Nothing happens to us outside of his permissive will, and he is totally in control of our days. And because of who we are, we should not worry.A second reason Jesus tells us not to worry is that it just simply does no good whatsoever. Jesus said, who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Worrying is totally worthless. It never produces any good results, but instead it causes us to lose our peace, to lose our joy, to waste our energy. Do you know how much energy it takes to worry? You are spending lots of emotional and mental energy when you’re in worry mode—and has it ever done you one bit of good? No, of course not. Worrying is worthless! That’s a really good reason for any sensible person to refuse to worry.Then Jesus gives us another strong reason not to worry.For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them (Matthew 6:32).All these things Jesus refers to include what you eat, what you drink, and what you wear. Jesus told his disciples that those who are not believers are always worrying about these things.Isn’t it true most people around you are worrying? Just think about the conversations you have with people, particularly people who are not yet believers in Jesus Christ. You’ll observe they are worrying a lot. If those of us who are disciples of Jesus Christ worry just like everyone else, what kind of testimony is that?If you are a real worrier, you can be sure people know it because you talk about it, it shows on your face and body language, and it’s not particularly attractive. Do an honest assessment of yourself: Are you prone to worry too much? According to Jesus, any worry is too much. He told us not to worry so when you do, you are disobeying him, right? Worrying is evidence you’re not trusting Jesus in that particular situation. And it’s not a good testimony for the difference Jesus makes in our lives.
What is the most useless and unproductive thing most of us do very often? I would say the most worthless thing we do is worry! And yet, I ask you, how many days go by you don’t worry about something? It just seems to be the place our thoughts go to when we experience any level of uncertainty or fear or lack of control.Jesus fully understood our propensity to worry, and he addressed it strongly in his Sermon on the Mount. From Matthew 6 we read:Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes. Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these…So do not worry, saying, “What shall we eat?” or “What shall we drink?” or “What shall we wear?” For…your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own (Matthew 6:25-34).In this sermon Jesus gave us three reasons not to worry. First, if you are a born-again Christian, you should not worry because of who you are! Jesus said God takes care of little birds, and even though they are not capable of taking care of their need for food, he provides food for them. And Jesus asks, “Are you not more valuable than they?”Are you more valuable to God than little birds? Surely the knowledge of how much God loves you, how deeply he cares for you should cause you to stop worrying. After all, our Heavenly Father is sovereign over everything and everyone in your life; he is always in control, and because you are his child, he has pledged to take care of your needs. That’s the first reason you should not worry—because you are a child of God, and he never leaves you or forsakes you.
I often think of the famous quote from Charlie Brown, “I love mankind; it’s people I can’t stand.” It’s the everyday little annoying habits of the people we associate with that can be more tiresome, more frustrating than more significant issues, don’t you think? Of course, we’re not quite so aware of our own little annoying bad habits that others may find troublesome, but no doubt we all have them. So, I want to explore with you some of these little annoyances which can become obstacles in good relationships.Annoying Habit Number One:You work with a person who makes daily calls to his or her mate or partner, and since you work in an open setting, you can’t help but hear the conversation. Depending on how they are getting along on any particular day, you may hear a nasty conversation with anger and accusations, or you may hear what sounds like sweet murmurings of baby talk.Obviously, if you hold a supervisory position over this person, it should be addressed directly with clear instructions—those kinds of conversations should be on personal time rather than on company time. However, if you are not this person’s manager, you may be able to bring this to your coworker’s attention in such a way they will see the benefit of changing that annoying habit.Proverbs 17:27 says: The one who has knowledge uses words with restraint, and whoever has understanding is even-tempered. Your words would need to be carefully chosen, delivered kindly, and done with the right motivation.For example, you might find the right moment—a private moment—to say something like, “You probably are not aware that your conversations with your mate can be heard by other people. I thought I’d let you know because, I know if it were me, I wouldn’t want others to listen in to my personal conversations. You might want to reserve those calls for times when you’re alone.”There’s a lesson for all of us to learn in this: Use our working time to work, not to rob our employer of the time which we are paid to work with elongated personal conversations, whether they’re overheard by others or not.As Christians in the workplace, these little annoying habits can do damage to our testimony for Jesus Christ, so we should make sure we’re not guilty of these.Annoying Habit Number Two:You have a coworker who just can’t ever seem to make it to work on time. Someone who is habitually late is not committing a great offense—this is simply an annoying bad habit.I find many who are guilty of habitual lateness frequently want to justify it by saying they work late to make up for it, or they have a very long commute—all of which may be true. But the facts are this: If your company has a certain start time, everyone should be there on time consistently. Why? Because it’s the right thing to do.This is a management issue. If it’s important for people to be on time, management must set the priorities, communicate them clearly, and hold people accountable. There would have to be some kind of negative consequence for the person who will not change theannoying habit.However, if you’re not this person’s manager, there’s not a whole lot you can do. One thing you don’t want to do is make snide remarks or communicate your annoyance with body language or harsh words. Unfortunately, this happens too often. People don’t confront the real issue and instead display their displeasure in other ineffective and unkind ways.If a coworker’s habitual lateness is having a direct negative impact on your ability to get your job done, it might be an indication that it needs to be addressed. First, try to kindly explain to the coworker the need you have for them to be on time and see if that works. But remember, unless you’re the manager, you don’t have the authority to demand anything from that person.Isn’t it interesting how something so small as this annoying habit can so easily turn into a real issue between two people and eventually lead to other,
Presented by Lauren StibgenAs we think about having integrity at work, there is no greater example to us than our savior, Jesus Christ. Perfect in every way he showed great integrity in his work. In every way, Jesus was true to those around him.Part of showing integrity is being faithful with your work and to the people who depend on you. What does faithful work look like? Again, let’s think about Jesus. His work was to spread the gospel alongside his disciples. It included healing the sick and blind and providing attentive hope to people who were outcasts in society at the time. He showed up to bring the truth to crowds of people from sunup to sundown. One could never question he had an incredible work ethic.How do you show up for your employer? What about your colleagues? Something simple like being on time for work or even being on time for a meeting goes a long way. Perhaps you offer to help a colleague struggling to complete a project or having a health struggle. Is it sharing an encouragement to someone who is feeling down? Can you pray with someone who has a hardship? Maybe you stick to a difficult project and see it through when everyone else complains. Like Jesus, can you stand up for the oppressed?Jesus, God as man was faithful to fulfill his purpose on the cross to take away the sins of the world, and he also asked God for help.Jesus calls out to God, “Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done” (Luke 22:42).Jesus cried out for help, but he ultimately knew God’s will would be done.This goes for you too! When you don’t feel like you can endure and be faithful to your work, cry out to Jesus for help!What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? (Romans 8:31)God is for you. He also established every step of your life beforehand.Your faithfulness to your work and reflecting Jesus will help others see your integrity.
Presented by Lauren StibgenHow do you handle reporting results at work? Results can mean different things depending on the job you hold. Whether the results are directly related to the financial wellbeing of your company or not, everything you report on can impact the results of your company. From the number of customer interactions you make a day to balance of a cash drawer, integrity counts!God wants us to work with integrity. He doesn’t want us to over or under report anything. The story that comes to mind when I think of finances and reporting results is of Ananias and his wife, Sapphira. The early church in the book of Acts was built on the financial donations of its members. People sold their belongings to pool and share all their resources. Ananias and Sapphira seem to have been well off. They had a large plot of land they sold off to contribute.After the sale Ananias came along and gave money to the disciples and stated it was everything he had from the sale of the land. Well, it wasn’t. He had held back a certain amount and not reported it. Ananias was struck dead. Even more alarming, Sapphira came along a few hours later with her share of the sale and affirmed that they had given all the money. You guessed it, she was struck dead too. It wasn’t that they didn’t give all the money to the church. It is the fact that they did not accurately report their gain to the disciples. While we don’t know for sure from God’s word, it is quite possible they could have given and been honest and still been alive to see the flourishing early church.It may be tempting to report you made a few more sales calls than occurred, but this will ultimately show in the results. Anything you think will make you look better in the short run will ultimately come to light. And remember, our God is a God who sees everything—even the things you think are hidden. Keeping the integrity of your reporting is one way you can be a faithful follower of Jesus Christ.
Presented by Lauren StibgenA sellout. Have you been one? Or have you experienced this at work? You confided in someone, placed trust in them. Maybe you shared a personal secret, juicy bit of office gossip, or maybe you even asked for help discreetly without someone knowing. Suddenly, everyone seems to know! It is terrible. You are the talk of the office and didn’t even mean to be. A sellout.Part of integrity is knowing when to mind your words and when to keep confidences at work. Your integrity in this manner can earn you deep trust with colleagues and bosses but if you fail in this, it can have devastating consequences on you or the person you sellout.Our Lord Jesus had a sellout at work—Judas. Now, Jesus had the advantage of being all knowing and knew Judas was part of the plan for the salvation of the world from sin and death. But he still had someone he worked with every day, trusted with the money, and dined with turn on him—literally to the point of his death on the cross. Judas did it for money. The picture we receive of the betrayal is even worse. Judas kissed Jesus on the cheek to indicate to the soldiers which one was Jesus.Ultimately, Judas regrets his deep betrayal of Jesus. He tries to give the money back and ultimately takes his own life in terror and grief over what he had done.Keeping your integrity of faith at work is reliant on you not being like Judas! At work, you won’t sellout someone to the point of death, but you could very well impact how someone is perceived. The Bible warns of the tongue’s power repeatedly.The soothing tongue is a tree of life, but a perverse tongue crushes the spirit (Proverbs 15:4).The heart of the righteous weighs its answers, but the mouth of the wicked gushes evil (Proverbs 15:28).Remind the people to be subject to the rulers and authorities, to be obedient, to be ready to do whatever is good, to slander no one, to be peaceable and considerate, and to be gentle toward everyone (Titus 3:1-2).Simply, don’t be a sellout! Keeping your integrity of faith at work is incumbent upon how you choose to keep confidences and lift others up—not tear them down.
Presented by Lauren StibgenAre you making work an idol? Idol’s surrounding work can impact the integrity of your faith. What are some of the idols that can crop up?Remember, an idol is a person or thing other than God that you worship more than God. The most common way work can become an idol is the amount of time you spend working and how it keeps you away from your time with God. Perhaps it is constantly missing small group Bible study because you are working late or not taking quiet time in the morning because you are rushing off to work. Have you worked on Sundays and stayed away from worshiping at church?What about people we encounter during the course of our business? A boss, an expert, maybe even a colleague. The boss asks a lot of you, and it is taking you away from God. Or you are hanging on the achievements of an expert in your field or a colleague’s great success that leads you to talk more about them than God.Does the killer of comparison have you working extra hard on your work or your overall image at work? How much energy do you give this?As followers of Jesus, we are called to worship the Lord our God with all our heart, mind, and strength and to give God glory, not man. In the Bible, we can turn to Daniel’s example of the faithful integrity. Daniel worked for King Nebuchadnezzar. He was one of a handful of the Israelites who was deemed smart enough to serve. We notice first Daniel did not accept the name given to him by the king.He also did not eat of the foods the king gave and only ate fruits and vegetables since the meat was unclean by Old Testament standards. Most notably, Daniel did not bow down to the statue erected of the king. He held the integrity of his faith and did not worship the idols of the king. You can read more about this in Daniel 2-6.In the workplace we need to be mindful of the idols that may creep in to challenge the integrity of our faith. Again, as professional followers of Jesus, we are sometimes the first introduction to Jesus someone will have! How are you holding this integrity at work?
Presented by Lauren StibgenLet’s face it, unless we are working in a faith-based organization, our work can bring us closer to walking in the way of the world than we would like. Not everyone we come into contact with whether a boss, colleague, customer, or vendor will be an example of how we should walk in our work life as Christ followers. And, even if we are working for a faith-based organization or are in ministry, we are not immune to running into sin!We often think of integrity at work as being honest. While this is one way we can reflect integrity, as Christians we are called to a higher standard of the integrity of our faith. If you profess your faith at work, this is especially important- does your walk match the talk or could someone who doesn’t know Jesus question the integrity of your faith?Temptations that take you farther from the integrity of your faith can come around the corner when we least expect them. Perhaps it is falling into using language that isn’t honoring God. Being around people who use a lot of, well, “choice words” can lead us into using the same. Perhaps it is other behavior like attending happy hour after work instead of heading home.However, sometimes we are not the problem. In the case of Joseph, he held his integrity while his employer did not. He consistently had to withstand advances from his employer’s wife. After denying her many times and even running away from her, she lied and said Joseph came after her! Joseph’s integrity and her lack thereof, landed him in jail!In many cases, unwelcomed advances at work are considered harassment and should be reported to a manager or to another authority at work. While you should be afforded protections from this type of unwanted advance at work, sometimes maintaining your integrity can feel very costly. I don’t think any of you would end up in jail, but I won’t make light of what may happen if you hold your integrity and deny someone’s advances at work!Relational integrity at work can take many forms other than the unwanted advances—or harassment—we see in the story of Joseph. Work can also be a place where the door of infidelity creeps open all too often. According to Forbes, 40% of people have cheated on a partner with a colleague. Proximity, time, late nights in the office and work trips all contribute to this. And the higher someone climbs the ladder, the more likely they are to engage in infidelity.Stay faithful in your walk with God and guard yourself against temptation.
Presented by Lauren StibgenHave you ever thought about the integrity of your faith? I would challenge you with the following questions:Is the state of your faith whole and undivided? And, how strong and built up is your faith? What is the level of your integrity?For the sake of our thinking, I want to bring us back to the fairy tale of the three little pigs. Maybe I am dating myself, and I am not sure if younger generations even know of this fable.Three little pigs set off to build their houses to protect themselves from the bad wolf. The wolf, of course, wanted to eat those three little pigs. The first little pig built his house with straw, the second with sticks, and the third pig used bricks. The wolf easily overcame the first two pigs’ homes made of straw and sticks, and they quickly ran to the third pig’s house made of bricks. Which pig’s house had the most integrity? The one of bricks, of course! Of course this is far from a Bible story, but now let’s consider the integrity of our faith.Our big bad wolf- Satan, manifests in the world today in so many ways. Inside and outside our houses, at work, everywhere.In Ephesians 2:1-2, the Word exhorts, As for you, you were dead in your transgressions and sins, in which you used to live when you followed the ways of this world and of the ruler of the kingdom of the air, the spirit who is now at work in those who are disobedient. Clearly, those who are not of Jesus are controlled in this world by the power of Satan.1 Peter 5:8-9a reminds us to be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith.The most poignant example of Satan’s desire to tempt us away from God is the temptation of Jesus Christ in the wilderness. The three temptations that are offered to Jesus are bread, safety, and power/fame. Satan tests God/Jesus to make bread from rocks, jump off a pinnacle, and worship him and receive all the kingdoms.Jesus replies in Matthew 4:10b, Worship the Lord your God, and serve him only.Satan tried to tempt the untemptable!Who is the wolf? Satan. Where is he? Everywhere in the world. In fact, in 2 Corinthians 4:4 the Word tells us, The god of this age has blinded the minds of unbelievers, so that they cannot see the light of the gospel that displays the glory of Christ, who is the image of GodThe world is blinded by Satan. So, what do we do?First, rest assured, Jesus has overcome this world. We can see this in the account of his temptation. He withstood. He has overcome death and Satan. For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life (John 3:16).Those of us who have accepted Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior have an armor that withstands the eternal condemnation from Satan.This does not mean he will not attack. In fact, we are promised he will. 1 Peter 5:8 tells us to be alert for the devil prowling around to devour. Even Jesus gave us the promise of trouble in John 16:33: I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world. Jesus gives us his teaching because he knows we will have trouble. He also reminds us to “take heart because he has overcome the world!”Now, back to those three pigs. I want you to think about yourself—your mind, body and soul—as the house that needs to withstand and weather the attacks of Satan in this world.1 Corinthians 6:19 reminds us that out bodies are a temple of the Holy Spirit within us who we have from God. We are not our own.Mark 3:25 says, And if a house be divided against itself, that house cannot stand.You cannot serve both God and this world. What is your faith house made of? Straw, sticks or bricks? What is the integrity of your home. Is it whole and undivided?
How much money do you need right now to solve all your problems? I wonder: Do you daydream about how good it would be if you just found a lot of money or somebody left you a lot in their will or you won the lottery?It’s easy to think more money would make life so much better—solve all your problems and take away all your fears. Money gets a hold on your heart faster than anything else. The Bible says money is the root of all evil, right? No, wrong! The Bible does not say that. I’m pointing out things we think the Bible says, but it really doesn’t. It doesn’t say money is the root of all evil, but rather the love of money is the root of all kinds of evil (1 Timothy 6:10).You see, you could be broke, homeless, and penniless and still be afflicted with this sin of loving money. In our consumer society where we judge success by how much you make and how much you own, money is on the throne of many people’s hearts—including Christians. It crawls up and takes over first place in your heart at the drop of a hat—fast and furious!Jesus said, Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; life does not consist in an abundance of possessions (Luke 12:15).Greed is the poisonous fruit that comes from loving money—not necessarily from having money, just from loving it, wanting it.When you think about it, greed is pride. It is a desire in us to show the world who we are by our status in life, our possessions, and our fame. Greed is also contagious. If you're around people who have lots of things and who focus their life on getting more and more things, you'll discover it's very difficult not to be swept right along into that greedy mindset for things. Furthermore, greed is cancerous. It grows fast, and it consumes and destroys everything it touches. No wonder Jesus said we must be on our guard against all kinds of greed!Jesus went on to say a man's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions. He said life is more than food or clothes; rather, life is peace and contentment. Those can't be bought; they are found only in Jesus.Remember loving money produces all kinds of greed, and greed will corrupt your heart and create many problems for you.
Has anyone ever told you God will not give you more than you can handle? I’m pointing out five things the Bible does not say, and it does not say God will not give you more than you can handle.The truth is, you and I cannot handle a lot of what life throws at us—not on our own, by our own work or our own strength. Think of people in the Bible who were faced with something they could not handle, but God could and did. David facing Goliath comes to mind. Goliath looked at David and despised him, saying he would give his flesh to the birds and wild animals. No way this boy was going to defeat Goliath! It was more than David could handle.But David said to Goliath:This day the Lord will deliver you into my hands…All those gathered here will know that it is not by sword or spear that the Lord saves; for the battle is the Lord’s, and he will give all of you into our hands (1 Samuel 17:46-47).Paul wrote to the Corinthians that when they were tempted, God would provide a way of escape for them. You and I are not equipped to handle all the temptations Satan throws at us. It is only because God provides a way to escape that we can stand against the enemy and be pure and faithful.Let’s face it—we cannot handle everything that comes our way! If we could, we would be able to take care of our sin problem. But we can’t, and that’s why we need Jesus all day, every day, giving us the motivation, the desire, the strength and the power to stand true to whatever comes our way.You often will face a lot more than you can handle, but if you’re born from above, you have the power of the Holy Spirit alive in you to equip and enable you to handle anything and everything.
Do you believe cleanliness is next to godliness? You’ve heard it many times, haven’t you? It sounds like it’s straight out of the Bible, but it’s not! I’m pointing out five things the Bible does not say and let me assure you that the Bible does not say: Cleanliness is next to godliness.Now of course it’s good to be clean and to keep your environment clean. God doesn’t approve of sloppiness or unsterile places or people. But to suggest you must be clean to be godly is certainly not true. Furthermore, to say because you are dirty, you can’t be close to God or know God is never right.Don’t you think sometimes we isolate ourselves from people we might consider “unclean,” whose standards of dress or way of life is below what we might call acceptable? Jesus never did that, you know. He associated with lowly people—poor and needy people.Many times in my visits to Africa, I visited very basic homes—mud huts, small shacks in the slums of Nairobi, simple dwellings with very few comforts. I found some of the most godly people I’ve met in those places. The widows I visited in the slums of Nairobi told me how thankful they were for their home and how blessed they were to have a safe place for their children. Not one of them complained about their tin roofs or mud floors.I have a friend in Kenya whose home is very simple with few furnishings. Her kitchen is a cooking pit with large pans for washing. She grows her own vegetables and milks her own cows. She is one of the hardest working women I know, and she loves Jesus. Her influence in that part of Kenya is amazing. Most of us would not call her home sufficiently clean or sterile, but her godly life is a testimony and encouragement to all who know her.You know, God doesn’t care about your outer cleanliness nearly as much as your inner cleanliness. Remember what he said to the very clean religious Pharisees:Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You clean the outside of the cup and dish, but inside they are full of greed and self-indulgence. . .on the outside you appear to people as righteous but on the inside you are full of hypocrisy and wickedness (Matthew 23:25,28).Cleanliness is not next to godliness. Loving Jesus and living for him is what makes us godly.
How often have you heard this saying: To thine own self be true? That sounds like it might come from the Bible. However, I’m pointing out five things the Bible does not say, and this is definitely one of them! This is actually a quote from Polonius in the Shakespearean play, Hamlet.It sounds nice, doesn’t it? This is the kind of saying that appeals to us because it makes us feel good about ourselves. It appeals to my self-esteem—Be true to yourself, Mary, because your “self” is a good thing. I could use this saying to validate my selfishness and self-centeredness. I could use it to justify my unbiblical bad habits or lifestyle. After all, I tell myself, I’m being true to myself.Everything I read in Scripture tells me my “self” is primarily my biggest problem. It teaches me that self-control is one of the fruits of the Spirit, and because the Holy Spirit resides in me by faith in Christ, it should be evidenced in controlling my “self,” not being true to myself. If you are always “true to yourself,” you will make decisions based upon what you want. The Bible tells us we are by nature and choice prone to selfishness and greed.Jeremiah 17:9 tells me:The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it? (Jeremiah 17:9)Being true to my heart—if it is not controlled by God’s Spirit—would mean being true to a heart that deceives me and makes me think I’m good when I’m not. A lot of ungodly stuff can reside in my heart—and in yours.For example, your heart is the place where resentment and bitterness take root and cause you all kinds of trouble. It is where pride, envy, and jealousy all start to grow. Being true to your self—or your inner person, your heart—could cause you much grief and confusion. Your self, on its own without being transformed by God, is not trustworthy. I wouldn’t advise you to be true to yourself.But I would challenge you to be true to Jesus. Consistently and intentionally devote time and effort to know Jesus. Follow this prayer from Bishop Chichester in 1253: “To see Christ more clearly, love him more dearly, and follow him more nearly.”Don’t let Shakespeare’s poetic saying—To thine own self be true—blind you to the truth that Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life. He is the truth that will never fail you or disappoint you. To Jesus be true.
It’s amazing how many sayings are believed to have come from the Bible, when they do not. Some are harmless, like the customs that have grown up surrounding the birth of Jesus. For example, we don’t know if there was an innkeeper, much less what he said. We have no idea how many wise men came to visit Jesus and, when they did, he was not in a manger but in a home, probably close to two years old. These are inaccuracies, but they do not do injustice to scriptural truth.The five things I want to point out are often accepted as truth, but they are actually opposed to Scripture. Here’s the first one:God helps those who help themselves.You won’t find that in the Bible! Instead, Romans 5:8 says just the opposite:But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us (Romans 5:8).There was and is nothing we can do to take care of our sin problem. Jesus paid it all—while we were still sinners and could do nothing to help ourselves!This readily accepted saying—God helps those who help themselves—seems to imply that we can force God to help us if and when we do something to show him we are helping ourselves. In other words, we can place God in our debt—force him to help us because, after all, we are helping ourselves. Furthermore, if we don’t do something to help ourselves, God will not help us.There is so much in Scripture contrary to this belief. It’s true God does not honor or approve of laziness. The parable of the talents teaches us to be diligent in the stewardship of what God has given us—talents, money, and skills. But our work for God, our obedience to him, must come from a heart of love and gratitude, not to force God’s hand, as it were. Additionally, when we start to believe God helps those who help themselves, then we can easily start to take credit for our accomplishments.When you hear someone say, “God helps those who help themselves,” remind yourself God helps those who are totally helpless because of his great love and amazing grace, not from any obligation imposed on him because we “helped ourselves.”
When the doctor taps your knee with the mallet to test your reflexes, your leg automatically swings, doesn't it? That's a reaction. It's an involuntary, uncontrolled action resulting from external stimuli of some sort. When you answer an email or a text, editing it for errors and choosing your words carefully, that's a response. It's carefully thought through, controlled, and intentional. I want to talk about reacting versus responding because I think many times we are in react mode when we should be in respond mode.Let me give you an example of reacting versus responding. Suppose you have a coworker who is very negative, and every time he or she opens his or her mouth, it seems that bad news comes out. This person never has anything nice to say about anyone or anything, and all day long you are forced to listen to his or her negative chatter.What does this negative person do to you? If you're in react mode, this person makes you angry, irritated, and frustrated. Having to listen to all that negative talk starts to make you think and talk negatively. That's a reaction. It's your automatic involuntary behavior which is caused by that external stimuli—a negative coworker.Now, instead of allowing that person to have a detrimental effect on you and your behavior, you can decide to respond instead of reacting. A response might be a smile when he or she says something negative to you. Or you may say something positive in response to his or her negative words. That positive response will help to keep you from being irritated and frustrated, and it will offset the person’s negative input by your positive one, keeping you from getting negative like your coworker. Another response to this negative coworker might be that you simply remove yourself from his or her company when you can, to avoid being exposed to that negativity.You can see a response takes some self-control and discipline on your part. First, you must know you have a tendency to react poorly to this negative person, and then you must have an alternate strategy that guides your response so you don’t react.One of my favorite stories about Jesus is the time when they asked him to prove by what authority he was doing his miracles. You'll find the story in Mark 11. The chief priests, the teachers of the law and the elders came to him. ‘By what authority are you doing these things?’ they asked. ‘And who gave you authority to do this?’ (Mark 11:27b-28).Consider what a reaction might have been. Jesus could have torn them apart piece by piece with words, had he so chosen. How dare they question his authority? How dare they ask for proof? Who were they to demand such from the Son of God? Everything Jesus had done was to help people and deliver them from sin and sickness. Yet, they would be so arrogant as to ask where he got his authority? He could have argued with them. He could have played one-upsman with them. He could have waged a war with words.But notice how Jesus responds:“I will ask you one question. Answer me, and I will tell you by what authority I am doing these things. John's baptism—was it from heaven, or of human origin? Tell me!” They discussed it among themselves and said, “If we say, ‘From heaven,’ he will ask, ‘Then why didn't you believe him?’ But if we say, ‘Of human origin’....” (They feared the people, for everyone held that John really was a prophet.)So they answered Jesus, “We don’t know.”Jesus said, “Neither will I tell you by what authority I am doing these things” (Mark 11:29-33).Isn't that an incredible response? Don't you love it?! Jesus refused to be pulled into playing their petty games, he did not allow them to bring him down to their level, and in a thoughtful response to their stupid accusation, he pinned them against the wall—but in such a way they couldn't even argue with him. Masterful, wouldn't you agree?One thing we need to learn about our reactions and our responses is that frequently we m...
Do you know what cyber incivility is? Cyber incivility can be a contributing factor to this epidemic of incivility we are experiencing.Cyber incivility is uncivil behavior over email, texts, and social media. It is so easy to send something that feels abrupt or unkind because you don’t have tone or volume to help communicate your message. Communicating electronically is inherently impersonal, and that’s why we have to go the extra mile to make sure our messages are presented in respectful and courteous ways.A good idea is to re-read everything you send electronically before you hit send; put yourself in the reader’s shoes and make sure you’ve included words of courtesy, words of appreciation, and words that show you care about the person. I know I can be so focused on getting the message out that I forget there is a person on the other end who needs to be recognized as a person, and a few courteous words can make a world of difference.Then there are the acts of incivility which can seem “victimless,” but are still rude behavior that contributes to the overall incivility of the workplace. For example, not refilling the office coffee machine or printer or tossing trash next to the trash can without picking it up are examples of victimless incivility. It does not have an immediate impact on another person, but it violates norms for courtesy, nonetheless.What do you say? Can we as Christ-followers in a world of incivility make a difference by just showing the love of Jesus and his compassion to the people in our world? We absolutely can, and these simple suggestions I’ve given you this week are so easy to do, don’t cost a thing, and can truly go a long way toward stemming the tide of incivility where you work.Here’s a verse that will help you in this challenge. I encourage you to pray it into your life:Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification (Romans 14:19).
Incivility leads to many harmful effects on employees and organizations. Coworker incivility has been linked to higher levels of employee burnout and lots of strain and stress. For the organization or the company, incivility has been related to decreased satisfaction and eventually decreased performance.And here’s the thing about incivility: it is contagious! An employee who is subjected to lack of civility, lack of good manners, lack of anyone seeming to care about them, often retaliates with uncivil acts of their own. It can spiral out of control within an organization rather quickly. But the good news is courtesy and good manners can be contagious, too.Remember Jesus has called us as his followers to be lights in a dark world. This means we not only are not caught up in workplace incivility, but we also actively and intentionally try to change the culture. But how?As I’ve often said, everything starts at the top, so if you are in a management job or in a place of influence, you should model what civil and courteous behavior looks like. Your level of courtesy and consideration toward others will trickle down to those who work for you and with you. As a manager, you are always “on,” which means you don’t have the luxury of letting down your guard, because your behavior has more impact than others. By setting the tone for the organization, managers and those in places of influence can help create a culture of simple courtesy, good manners, and caring about others.As Christ followers, here is our standard:Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others (Philippians 2:3-4).That is very civil behavior, and with the power of God’s Spirit, you can be a person who values others above yourself.
I’ve given two specific things you can do if you are intentional about bringing back simple common courtesy and civil behavior where you work. First, use the words please and thank you all day every day—as often as it is appropriate. You can’t overdo it! Second, ask at least one person a day how they are and then sincerely listen to their answer and respond appropriately. That just means caring about others. As Christ-followers, courtesy and caring should be the norm for us.The third suggestion is: Watch out for sarcasm because it can become a weapon that hurts others, whether intentionally or not. At my church, one of the pastors said he realized he was too sarcastic, just too often responding with sarcasm. It wasn’t intended to harm anyone—indeed it was done as a joke or a clever retort. But he felt it had become a bit much among the staff. So, he put a jar out and suggested that every time someone used sarcasm, they put a dollar in the jar, and then they would give that money to our fellowship fund, for people facing financial hardship.I don’t know how much he raised for the fellowship fund, but I know it caused everyone to be aware that sometimes those clever sarcastic words can be hurtful and sound anything but civil and polite. I’m not saying that you must walk on eggshells for fear of saying the wrong thing. But I have noticed my own tendency to let go of a quick response, intended as a joke, and I need to be careful it doesn’t come across as ridicule and hurtful.For those of us who are prone to use sarcasm, we should keep in mind what we may have meant as a clever response was instead hurtful to someone else. As Christians, we can do much to change a culture of incivility to one of caring and good manners. If there’s too much sarcasm in your world it just might contribute to this problem of incivility. Be on guard for this.
As followers of Jesus Christ, we should lead the way in our worlds to try to stamp out these bad habits of rudeness and replace them with simple courtesies. Good manners do not have to remain a quaint memory from the past.Examples of workplace incivility include insulting comments, disparaging someone’s work, spreading false rumors, and social isolation. I propose you take this as your personal challenge—to do everything you can to stop incivility in your world.Here’s my second suggestion: Be sure to ask at least one person every day how they are doing and then listen to their answer. Don’t let them get by with the typical response of “I’m fine” but probe a bit. Maybe you know they haven’t felt good lately, so ask how they’re feeling. Perhaps they are under a great deal of stress in their job, and you can ask about that. The most important part of this suggestion is you sincerely ask, and you sincerely listen. Sometimes this can open a door for you to assure them that you will pray for them.There are very few people in this world who will object to you praying for them, even if they don’t pray themselves. When people feel cared for, when they believe at least one person appreciates what they do or what they’re going through, it will affect the way they treat others. And this could cause a chain reaction of people caring for others. Imagine how that would improve the morale in your workplace!Putting these two suggestions together, make it your intention to say please and thank you every time it’s appropriate and show care and concern to at least one person every day. It will make a difference—you will make a difference—and Jesus will be honored by your actions.Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience (Colossians 3:12).Put on these beautiful attributes each day and I promise you will make a huge dent in turning around incivility in your world.
Incivility is out of control! A study reports 70% of U.S. adults say incivility is at a crisis level. Is that true where you work—or where you live?You see signs of it every time you watch the news or spend any time on social media. It seems we’ve allowed this lack of civility to creep into our culture until it has somehow become the new normal—as acceptable behavior.Doesn’t this give us Christ-followers a wonderful opportunity to demonstrate the difference Jesus makes in our lives? This opens the door for us to be lights in a dark world, and that is what Jesus has called us to.First, let’s define incivility. The textbook definition is “rude or unsociable speech or behavior.” Incivility in the workplace can be perhaps more subtle, of lower intensity, maybe not even recognizable at first. But it shows up as lack of courtesy, abandoning simple polite behaviors and practices, or using sarcastic remarks, rude and abrupt responses. And often, the people engaging in uncivil behavior don’t intend harm, it’s just become a bad habit.I think it’s time we fight back, don’t you? I have some simple suggestions you can do to stem the tide of incivility in your world—your work world, your home world, wherever.Here’s my first suggestion: Make sure you say please and thank you at every possible opportunity. Something as simple as that can make a difference, and if those words of courtesy have been lost in your world, reintroduce them! Say them to your family members; often we neglect courtesy in our homes. Find opportunities to thank people and don’t be afraid of over-doing it.I challenge you to keep a count of the number of times you say please or thank you in a given day and determine to increase that number each day. Don’t discount the power of polite words spoken at the right time and in the right way. Those words become little rays of light in the darkness.
If you were able to read part one, you know Louise, Fran’s close Christian friend at work, just lost a new account, and it's become obvious she lost it because of her strong Christian principles. Fran had more trouble accepting this than Louise, but after talking to Jesus, she realized this was not a fight that can be undertaken with the weapons of the world. Rather, it must be fought with prayer.Now, this Saturday morning, Fran is thinking of what special thing she can do for Louise to make up for this disappointment, and she gets an idea. She calls Louise and says, "Hey, if you’re not busy tonight, why don’t you come over. We can watch a good movie or something—the kids want to see Toy Story 2 again—and I’ll cook spaghetti. We can have our own private party, to celebrate the victory that God has given you and the good he's going to bring out of this bad situation!""Hey, Fran," Louise says, "you're so kind to think of that, but did you forget? We promised Claire and Maritza we'd have dinner with them and catch a movie.”"Oh, right," Fran says, "I did forget. Bummer! I better make sure Mom can watch the kids tonight. Thanks for reminding me."Louise says, "Well, Claire and Maritza are new at church, and we need to get to know them better."So, Fran gets busy with all her Saturday chores and errands before it's time to go out. They meet Claire and Maritza at a nice little Italian restaurant and enjoy some good pasta."Hey, what movie do you want to see?" Louise asks. They discuss two or three and Claire suggests one that is rated R.“You know,” Fran says, “I just have a rule for myself that I don’t see R rated movies. But I know there is one rated PG-13 at the Plaza that sounds kinda cute. That okay with you guys?”Everyone agrees it sounds okay. Claire says, “You mean, you never go to an R rated movie? But some of them are really good.”“Well, the acting may be good and things like that, but I just don’t want to fill up my mind with scenes of violence or sex or inappropriate language or lifestyles. You know, what you see with your eyes has a stronger impact on you than anything else,” Fran responds.It’s obvious this is a whole new thought for Claire, and they talk about it a bit more. Louise joins in to say she has learned to be very selective about the movies she watches at home, in the theater, Netflix—whatever. “I’ve discovered once I see those images, they are very difficult to get out of my head. In fact, when they started invading my prayer time, that’s when I knew I had to be more selective in what I watched.”As they wait in line for tickets, Louise says to Fran on the side, "I wonder about this movie, don't you, Louise? What if it's no good?""We'll leave," Fran says quietly."You mean, just leave Claire and Maritza?" Louise says, somewhat concerned."We don't watch junk, right, Louise," Fran says as they go into the theater. They get settled into their seats with their popcorn, looking forward to a lighthearted funny movie.About ten minutes into the movie, Fran begins to feel nervous. This is not the wholesome movie it is advertised to be. The lead couple are not married, living together, as though there’s nothing wrong with it. And the language is not all that wholesome, either. She can tell Louise is also not comfortable with it.After a few more minutes, Louise whispers in her ear, "We can't sit through this movie, Fran. This is trash. I think we have to leave, don’t you?""I agree it's a rotten movie," she whispers back, "but I don’t want to embarrass Claire and Maritza.""I'll take care of that, Fran, don't worry," she says, and with that she whispers something to Claire then motions to Fran to head out of the theater.As they get to the lobby, Fran asks “What did you tell Claire?""I just said we were uncomfortable with the movie, and we'd meet them right outside the lobby when it's over. C'mon, let's go get a cup of coffee."
As you are aware, the world around us has lowered its standards of honesty and integrity to the point that lack of integrity has become acceptable behavior in many respects. Yet this lack of integrity is costing American businesses millions of dollars every year, and even non-believers are waking up to the fact that integrity on the job is a bottom-line issue.It certainly is a bottom-line issue with the Lord, and as Christ-followers, we must be so careful not to compromise biblical standards of integrity as workers in today's marketplace. Access to the internet has become a major issue in many organizations. Employees are known to surf the internet, play games during company time, and even watch pornography during work hours.Most companies have rules to govern this issue and have put controls on their system to block certain websites. But, of course, many have learned how to skirt those rules and controls. If you’re thinking using a little company time for personal things is no big deal, I'd warn you you're starting down a dangerous road.Our enemy will find very subtle ways to get us sidetracked and cause us to damage our witness for Jesus Christ. He'll start with something like wasting some company time on personal interests or business, and then when we've lowered our standard a little bit, we're vulnerable to further temptation.Peter wrote:Live such good lives among the pagans that … they may see your good deeds and glorify God … (I Peter 2:12).Remember, it is wrong to use significant company time for your own personal benefit or business. And don't forget, the best way to represent Jesus on your job is to live such a good life among your coworkers that they will see the difference in you and that will bring glory to God. Make sure you're not damaging your testimony for the Lord through lack of attention to these issues of honesty.
Frequently in the workplace you may run into situations in which you're not sure what is the right thing to do. Here's one such situation.A woman worked in a sales office with a rule that employees could not conduct personal business on company time or using company resources. But she worked with a man who continually broke that rule and spent at least an hour each day on personal calls and taking care of outside business. She knew this was wrong. But was it her responsibility to tell her supervisor, or should she keep quiet?The question gets right to the core of a very common problem in American business today: employee theft. There is a staggering amount of stealing from employers among people who would never consider themselves thieves or dishonest. Certainly, Christians in the marketplace need to set the highest standards of integrity for their own lives in this regard.Most employers understand it is sometimes necessary for employees to make a quick personal call on company time. However, many violate those privileges and use company equipment and time for excessive personal purposes, which could and should be done after-hours and at their own expense.In this situation, the company has established guidelines concerning this, and it is their responsibility to monitor it. Many times, management makes a rule and then fails to enforce it or chooses to ignore it. But it is a management job to enforce rules, and if this person does not report personally to you, it’s not your job to report their infraction of the rules. If you were directly asked or it impacted your ability to do your job, you would, of course, have to be honest.Depending on your relationship with that coworker, you might look for an appropriate opportunity to broach the subject with him. Otherwise, this is management’s job, not yours. Any action to right this wrong could be perceived as "tattling" on coworkers.
Here's a real-life business issue some of you have faced. You're in sales and your manager has asked you to talk only about the good aspects of your product and ignore, or seriously downplay, the negatives. You feel uncomfortable because this seems so close to lying. What do you do?My career began in sales, so I understand the dilemma. One thing to remember is all products have their strengths and weaknesses. The sales job is to emphasize the benefits of the strengths and overcome the objections to the weaknesses. That is marketing, and done correctly, it is not dishonest.Hopefully you have a product which you believe in and which you can honestly sell as a benefit to your customers. If that is not the case and instead you feel you have an inferior product, which is misleading and/or faulty, then you must decide if you're working for the right company. A prerequisite for a Christian in sales, in my opinion, is to have a product or service that brings benefits to your customers.While your sales pitch does not have to include the negatives, you must be prepared, as a good sales person and more importantly an honest one, to discuss your product deficiencies. If the prospect asks questions that expose those deficiencies, you should be very honest about it. In no way would it be right for you to deny or cover up the weaknesses of your product or service deliberately.Of course, you should be prepared to offset the deficiency with a benefit. This is the skill of selling; it's called "handling objections," and good sales people learn how to do that. But as a Christian, you should never do that at the cost of honesty.If you feel you are being asked to do something dishonest and it bothers your conscience, then you need to act.Romans 14:14 tells us if anyone regards something as unclean, then for him it is unclean. And verse 23 says the person who partakes of something which he thinks is wrong is condemned, because he is not acting in faith.Give it prayer, and if it continues to bother you, God will show you what action to take. Don't go against your conscience. You'll be miserable, and you won't be able to sell very well, either.
I thought I'd share a situation another listener is facing, since I imagine there are many of you who have similar questions.This listener's company is very production oriented, and they have strict guidelines about working quickly, taking many calls, handling questions fast, and getting off the phone in order to take more calls. The number and length of their calls are monitored and reported, and much pressure is applied to work very fast.She felt in doing this, she was forced to treat callers somewhat abruptly, not really helping them like she should, and this was quite frustrating to her. But her management was not impressed with her desire to answer each call completely and thoroughly; their only interest seemed to be productivity.I think there are many situations where we feel something is not being managed in the most customer-oriented way and we'd like to do it better, but the guidelines get in our way. What should be a Christian's response? Do it the way we think it should be done, or follow instructions?I think as long as the instructions you're given are not dishonest or illegal, your responsibility is to obey those in authority. After all, management has the right to run the company as they please, even if they choose to run it in the ground. Unfortunately, many companies operate without a real customer orientation.I believe strongly every organization reflects the attitudes and philosophy of the person at the top. And if the person at the top of your company chooses productivity over quality, that's the way it's going to be. Obviously, not only is it symptomatic of a lack of human care and concern, but it also lacks good business sense. Eventually, poor quality and inadequate customer service will ruin a business.As Christians in the marketplace, we should try to treat all people, including customers, with care. Not only is your customer the person who pays your salary, they are also people created and loved by God, individuals who are important. And for those reasons, it's imperative to do your best to give them good service. When that is in conflict with company policy, you should look for opportunities to try to change the system, if possible. But I recognize it isn't always that easy to do.No one said it would be easy, but living for Jesus in the marketplace gives us incredible opportunities to show the world his love and care. So, don't get discouraged; keep praying for guidance and God will give you strength.
What does it mean to be able to laugh at the days to come?She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come (Proverbs 31:25).For me, it means as I look at my future, I know regardless of what happens to me, my future destiny is secure. I've got eternal life right now because I've accepted Jesus as my Savior. So, regardless of what the days hold for me, I'm not beset with the fears and worries of those who don't know Jesus as their Savior; I can laugh at the days to come.It means I can face an uncertain financial future and laugh at it. I can't be certain I'll have an income next week or next month or next year. But because my safety net is Jesus Christ, I can laugh at that prospect and say, "Never fear! God has promised to supply all my needs. Laugh at the days to come!"As I look at the trouble in the Middle East and see how tenuous things are in this world, I realize it would only take a small spark to put us on the brink of another awful war. And while that certainly isn't a laughing matter, I can laugh at the fear and the oppression of those thoughts, because my God is sovereign, and nothing is going to happen in this world without his purpose being served.Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the Lord our God (Psalm 20:7).You may be facing many uncertainties, and you just don't know what the future will bring. But if your trust is in God—not in people, not in money, not in possessions or position—then you can laugh at the days ahead.Paul put it another way:Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God (Philippians 4:6).A great way to avoid anxiety and worry is to laugh at the days ahead—those days are in God's hands, and he is perfectly capable of taking you through whatever they may hold.
For those who aren't familiar with these stories, Fran is a young widow with two school-aged children, who has a job in a marketing organization. We've been following her story since she went back to work after her husband's untimely death, and several years have passed. She has found a good friend where she works, Louise, who is a strong Christian, and their friendship has become very close and supportive. It is a blessing in Fran’s life.She and Louise are account reps with good track records and success. Their hard work and honesty have paid off, and they are respected by their management and coworkers. This Thursday morning Fran is really excited for Louise because she expects Louise will be awarded a big new national account. She's the right person for that account, and their manager, Marilyn, has indicated she recommended her. The final decision is to be made today, so it's been hard for Fran to stay focused.The phone rings just about lunchtime, and it's Andy, a friend in the art department. "Hi, Fran," Andy says, "just wanted to tell you how sorry I am for Louise.""What do you mean, Andy?" Fran asks with a lump in her throat."Oh, no, you haven't heard! Oh, I'm sorry. Louise didn't get the new account; it went to Lloyd.""Lloyd? Why Lloyd?" Fran asks in bewilderment. "Lloyd isn't nearly as qualified as Louise, and Marilyn told Louise. . .""I know, I know," Andy says, "nobody knows why Lloyd got it instead of Louise. I just feel so bad for her.""Thanks for letting me know, Andy," Fran says. "I need to find Louise. Talk to you later."She hangs up and dials Louise's number, no answer. Her office is up on the next floor, but she just can't sit still and wait any longer. So, she heads for her office, taking the shortcut up the stairwell. As she's going up, Louise is coming down."Oh, Louise," Fran says, "I was headed for your office. Andy just told me. . .""Yeah, can you believe it?” Louise looks at her with a slight grin. "Marilyn told me Lloyd was selected because of his quote 'experience with entertaining large national accounts.'""What did she mean?" Fran asks."Oh, I think it's clear; somebody decided I wouldn't be willing to wine and dine this client as they expect to be," Louise replies."You mean because you're a Christian and they know you don't do the ‘party-thing’?" Fran replies. "Louise, that's discrimination. Didn't you protest to Marilyn?""Look, she feels as badly about it as I do," Louise says, "so I'm not going to hassle her, Fran.""You mean, you're not going to fight this, Louise?” Fran can't believe her ears."No, I prayed about it, and I have to trust God and let it go," Louise tells her."But Louise, this is a matter of principle. It's wrong for the company to discriminate against you because of your convictions," Fran says. "You're just letting them get by with inappropriate—and might I add—illegal behavior. It's not right!""Well, Fran, I have to do what I think is right, and this is one of those 'turn the other cheek' times. I can't prove they've discriminated against me, and even if I could, it would not be a good testimony for me to start demanding my rights," Louise replies. "The company has basically been good to me, Fran, and I just have to deal with this disappointment.""But Louise, not only is this wrong for you, but it’s also wrong for the company," Fran argues. "You're much better at your job than Lloyd is; you'd do a much better job for that client.""Fran," Louise says, "please, don't take this so hard. I really appreciate your concern for me, but I just don't believe this is a matter over which I should raise an issue. The Lord just keeps telling me to let it go, Fran, so that's what I have to do."Tears come to Fran's eyes and start down her cheeks as she stands in the stairwell with Louise. She tries to cover up but Louise notices. More than anything, they are tears of anger because of this unfair thing that has h...
Presented by Lauren StibgenDoes finding rest in community sound counterintuitive? We have talked about some very individual ways to engage in rest the last few days. After all, sleep and solitude don’t really match up with connection and community! They do help prepare you, however, to find rest in this very special way.We find connection in community. We can also find that Jesus calls us to be in community with him! I have learned having other faithful believers in my midst helps me see how Jesus is my one place for rest. Community connection is a beautiful give and take of carrying each other’s joys and burdens as we are told in Romans 12:15, and it is a reminder of what Jesus tells us in scripture:Come to me all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest (Matthew 11:28).Jesus doesn’t tell us to be alone. He tells us to come to him for rest. Even in the other rest habits of sleep and solitude, we know we are truly never alone.As all of us are called to be Christ’s ambassadors, one of the ways we can do this is by considering the simple words come to me. How are you opening yourself up to the rest habit of being in community? Are you in a small group at church? Do you have a Bible study that you participate in? Maybe you are part of one of our ministry offerings here at The Christian Working Woman.The most important part of being part of any community is being consistent. You cannot reap the benefits of having someone rejoice with you or weep with you if you do not connect consistently. This is one of the things Jesus was so good at. He was always on the ready!And think of all the ways we see him in community with his disciples. They attended a wedding together, they dined together, they celebrated important holidays together, they traveled together. Each and every opportunity was a chance for the disciples to get to know the heart of Jesus more and more.We have focused on small daily habits that can help us find more rest. I know being in community like the disciples isn’t a realistic daily habit most of us can employ, but what about even one person? Do you have a connection in faith that can help you see Jesus?Is it sending an encouraging text to let someone know you are praying for something specific? Perhaps you can bring this person a meal during a stressful season. Even a greeting card can go a long way in making a person feel loved.After all, the greatest commandment is love. In great love, there is great rest.
Presented by Lauren StibgenSolitude is the state of being alone or being removed from the hustle and bustle of a day. As we consider daily rest that can help us with work-life balance, I was intrigued by solitude. Simply, this isn’t something I do well, but I know it is a habit that can help draw me closer to God.I know we say we want alone time, especially in the hurried pace of each day and competing priorities, but do we really like solitude? How do we quiet our minds when we do find this time? What could this look like?We can look to our best model of rest once again: Jesus. First, when did Jesus find solitude and where? From Scripture, we know Jesus would often rise up in the morning while it was still dark to head to desolate places like a mountaintop to be in solitude. He knew doing this before the hustle of the day started would mean less interruption. He also knew it wasn’t a matter of just rolling out of bed or resting quietly in bed to find this space. He physically went somewhere else.Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went to a solitary place… (Mark 1:35).Yesterday, we talked about the importance of sleep, so maybe rising early isn’t something you feel you can do yet! Getting your sleep habits in order can get you into the holy rest habit of rising early like Jesus to find solitude! If you live somewhere where the weather is good so you can be in nature, that’s amazing! But, for many of us who balance work and children, the solitary place may look a little different. Just like you work on small changes to your sleep habits, how can you adjust in small ways to find solitude in your home space? Is there a nook, or a corner or a comfy chair calling to you?Why did Jesus seek solitude, and what did he do when he was truly alone? He considered important matters and prayed to God. It is also how he dealt with the heavy emotions like the loss of a dear friend or the stress of the multitudes seeking him in need.Does this sound like you? I know as a Christian working woman you have many important matters to consider. You have stress from the day and quite often, you experience things which trouble your soul. If you are not finding moments of holy rest in solitude, how can you commune with the Lord to help discern important decisions or simply tell him your feelings?Can you set that alarm even 15 minutes earlier tomorrow? Let rest be your motivation!
Presented by Lauren StibgenWe know rest is an important part of our wellbeing and balance. Rest is a command; it is holy, and it improves most everything God cares about for you from your physical and mental health to relationships! So, how are you finding rest in sleep?A quick Google search defines sleep as “a condition of body and mind that typically recurs for several hours each night, in which the eyes are closed, muscles are relaxed, and the activity of the brain is altered.”Sleep is something God created our human bodies to do, and, while we know God rested on the seventh day, we also know God is all present, all knowing, and all mighty! One would say God is always on the job, and he is always on the job so we can depend on him—even for sleep.Jesus was the ultimate example of how important it is to sleep and wholeheartedly depend on God.In Mark 4:37-38 we can picture this. A small boat being tossed to and fro in the waves with its passengers clinging to the sides, and there is Jesus, asleep on a cushion!Is this a picture of your life right now? How much is your boat being tossed to and fro, and is it disrupting the most important rest, sleep? Lack of sleep can deeply hurt your immune system, your emotions, your ability to think and do good work, and it can even lead to increased depression and anxiety! If God created us for good works which he prepared beforehand (Ephesians 2:10), I would surely say he also created us for sleep! Without this we cannot do his good work!In vain you rise early and stay up late, toiling for food to eat—for he grants sleep to those he loves (Psalm 127:2).There are countless readings you can do on good sleep hygiene. I have the pleasure of knowing a functional medicine doctor, Dr. Stacie Stephenson, who talks about the need for preparing your sleep space on a regular basis. Making small changes to your space can make all the difference in winding down for the night. She suggests: a cool, dark space. Make sure you eliminate blue light. You should also try to not engage with your phone or any media (like tv) an hour before bedtime. Taking a warm bath or enjoying an herbal tea can also help you wind down. Don’t be overly ambitious with all these changes at once. Pick one or two small habit changes you can implement.
Presented by Lauren StibgenAre you a doom scroller? Did you know all those apps on your phone are uniquely created to keep you scrolling and passing time? If we are honest, we start with one silly animal video or even a news clip and then watch and watch.Before we know it, an hour has passed. And what do we have to show for the scroll? Perhaps it has taken your mind off a hectic day, but has it done more harm than good? Has the viewing caused you to avoid things you should have done? Or maybe it raised your stress levels because you viewed something on social media that hurt your feelings.I am all for a funny video, but often, the great access to digital distractions keeps us from true rest. Research tells us people spend on average about two hours and twenty-five minutes consuming social media per day. This consumption can ultimately take away from rest if we allow it. But what if that device can help you with practices of rest or help bring you closer in relationship with God?With the advent of apps, there are many which focus on prayer, Bible verses, and quiet time in God’s word. You may even be listening to this as a replay on your favorite digital platform, or you may tune in to our Zoom Bible Studies or our Walking Worthy podcast. All of this can be worthy time spent that draws you closer into relationship with God and the body of Christ.If we go back to thinking about rest as holy, we can better frame our digital time. Are the things you are engaging with helping you dedicate yourself to God, serving him in your rest and displaying excellence both morally and spiritually? The well-named doom scroll is not doing any of these things. I would not consider it holy. But perhaps some of the other actions noted above are. Engaging with faith-based content can be good, until it causes you stress or takes away rest.Your device has some tools which can help you to both plan and limit your time spent consuming media—faith based or not. Applying time limits on your favorite apps can be one way to increase your rest daily, limiting the temptation of the scroll. You can even set a passcode so you are not tempted to click “ignore” when your time is up. I know people who hold each other’s passcodes for accountability.Aside from time limits, I also use my phone to remind me to take small moments of quiet reflection during the day or to remind me to pray during the day when I get too busy. It has helped me take more restful time out. I also love peaceful worship music. For example, I love to listen to music and write at the same time. As I prepare to talk to our audience, my phone is playing a constant stream of lovely music in the background.As you can see, a device can both be a help and a hinderance to rest. Ask yourself if the rest you are getting from being on your device is holy and pleasing to God! This is one measure you will not forget! Building good digital habits can help you get closer to Sabbath rest.
Presented by Lauren StibgenWhy do we desire rest? What are the benefits of rest? And what do you consider rest? Is it physical? Mental? Or is it both. The years seem to roll by quickly, and with a new calendar comes new intentions that can often sputter out just as quickly as they came to mind. I want to consider rest, and how critical it is to this elusive work-life balance we often strive for.We desire rest because it is how God created us—in his image—Imago Dei. Our God is a working God. We see this intentionality in scripture from the beginning. God gave us the first look at rest on the seventh day of creation after he had made everything—the heavens and earth and all created things.By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work. Then God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done (Genesis 2: 1-3).Not only is rest one of the ways we are like God in his image but rest itself is holy.Holy. How is this word defined? Dedicated and consecrated to God, sacred, devoted to the service of God, morally and spiritually excellent.From this, we learn in rest we: dedicate ourselves to God, serve him in our rest, and display excellence both morally and spiritually! This makes me want to rest!Although I know the ultimate model of this rest is truly the commanded Sabbath, making small habit changes each and every day can help bring you one step closer to learning how to find this seemingly elusive rest. After all, the benefits to you both physically and mentally are significant.Leadership articles for work are wrought with commentary about rest. In fact, one Forbes business article states, “Rest is a fundamental part of success…” Benefits include improved mental health, boosted creativity, increased productivity, well-being, reduced stress, improved mood, and strengthened relationships.I know God is in the business of all these things! He wants us to be healthy. He wants us to create like he did and does, and he most definitely wants our relationships with those closest to us to be strong. Even if business tells us rest will bring success, our God says, remember, you are made in my image. Seek my ways, for they are best.
Presented by Lauren StibgenPicture for me the wheel on a bicycle. In the center you have a hub. From the hub you have many spokes that connect to the outer circle of the wheel to make it round and keep it round. These spoke form pie-slice sections in the wheel to create stability. All these parts work together to move the bicycle down the road smoothly.Now, I want you to picture what happens when you remove the hub. Suddenly, all those spokes have no connection and the structure just fails. Or maybe the hub is there but you have a few spokes that are shorter than the others. Your wheel becomes very wobbly, and you simply fall flat. That bicycle is going nowhere fast! And hopefully none of this happened while you were cruising down the road quickly!You might be thinking, what in the world does any of this have to do with Jesus or our walk. Well, let me repaint this wheel for you. At the center of your wheel is Jesus. He is our hub that holds all the spokes together. The spokes represent different areas of our life, that if left unattended consistently, become out of shape or have different levels of “fullness” to create a perfect rounded life. The visual is meant to help you find a balance while remembering that Jesus must be in the center of all areas to have true success! And here’s a news flash: I have been using this exercise for over 8 years, and my wheel has never been perfectly round. However, came into better shape when I took my relationship with Jesus out of the spokes and made him the hub!Let’s consider this hub. How do we evaluate our walk with Jesus? What are some of the commandments and spiritual disciplines we are called to keep that help ensure we have a hub for our wheel? I consider these the elements of abiding.John 15:4-5 exhorts, Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”Jesus is very clear. He is the vine (or hub), and my life is made up of these branches (or spokes). If I am not abiding in him, I simply can’t do anything. I could nurture my branches and water them and try everything I know how to do, but if I am severed from the vine, none of my efforts will ever bear fruit! So, how do we abide? Here are a few practices and some Scripture that point to the goodness of each.First, simply be in God’s Word. You cannot expect a fully abiding relationship with Jesus if you never read your Bible and study it in a deeper way. Every time I read a book of the Bible again, I receive a new revelation that is perfect for me in that time. It is like God knows what I need, when I need it! Imagine that! Just like a vine that provides perfect nourishment for the branch, God is nourishing me with his Word in the most perfect way. If I am not reading, he is not feeding!Deuteronomy 8:3 states that man does not live by bread alone, but man lives by every word that comes out of the mouth of the Lord.In John 6:35 Jesus further clarifies, “I am the bread of life; whoever comes to me shall not hunger, and whoever believes in me shall never thirst.”Another practice of abiding is prayer. Are you taking time to talk to God? Or do your days hurry frenetically, filled with stress? If you are on social media, I know you have seen the quote, “Have you prayed about it more than you’ve talked about it”? If I am honest, there are many times I find myself steeped in idle talk with others rather than praying to God about a problem. As we discover the spokes of our wheel, we’ll see why this is problematic.Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak (Matthew 26:41).There are countless verses about prayer, but this one is critical for our balanced life.
As I was reading John 7 recently, I saw again how God is not impressed with the same things that impress us.In this chapter, the Pharisees were trying to get rid of Jesus. They sent the temple guards to arrest him. But instead of arresting Jesus, the guards started listening to him. They'd never heard anyone like Jesus before, and they were captivated. Later when they went back to the chief priests and Pharisees without Jesus, they were confronted. Why didn't you bring him in? asked the Pharisees.They answered, No one ever spoke the way this man does.You mean he has deceived you also? the Pharisees retorted. Has any of the rulers or the Pharisees believed in him? No! But this mob that knows nothing of the law—there is a curse on them.The Pharisees pointed out none of the religious leaders and educated clergy had believed in Jesus, so therefore he couldn't be for real. Jesus had no diplomas hanging on the wall, no titles after his name. He didn't associate with the recognized leaders of his day. Just because the mob was impressed with Jesus didn't mean anything to the Pharisees because they saw the common person as uneducated, and their views were therefore not important.Just like us, the Pharisees judged people by earthly measures: What family did you come from? What school did you go to? What positions have you held? Jesus didn't measure up in any of those categories, so the Pharisees rejected him.Today we all tend to be impressed with achievements, titles, and positions. But remember, earthly credentials are meaningless to God. Throughout the ages God has used people who look unusable to us. It doesn't mean we shouldn't try to learn and grow and achieve. It just means we must constantly remind ourselves that our achievements and credentials don't carry any weight with God.One thing impresses God: a heart that desires to know and love him above all else. I'm thankful God isn't impressed with earthly credentials, because that means everyone, including me, can please God regardless of what the world thinks of us.
Everybody needs encouragement and help at times, don't they? As I read 2 Corinthians 7, I realized even the great Apostle Paul had his bad times when he needed other people.For when we came into Macedonia, this body of ours had no rest, but we were harassed at every turn—conflicts on the outside, fears within (2 Corinthians 7:5).Doesn't that describe the way you feel at times? Conflicts without fears within? But this is the spiritual giant, Paul, and it surprises us to realize he would have these feelings. We just need to remember that positions of prominence or responsibility do not isolate anyone from being human. Paul was tired and fearful. He needed help.Where did his help come from? He goes on to say,But God, who comforts the downcast, comforted us by the coming of Titus (2 Corinthians 7:6).He needed a friend at his side to comfort him, and so Titus came along. We could say to Paul, “But wasn't it enough to have the Lord there?” And Paul would respond, “The Lord was there in the person of Titus. He comforted me by sending Titus.”Yes indeed, that's how the Body of Christ should function. God wants to use us in each other's lives as messengers of comfort and encouragement, to pick up each other at those weary and frightened moments of our lives. God has given us each other for that purpose.Paul goes on to say he was comforted by the good report Titus brought to him of the concern for his welfare by his friends in Corinth. Paul needed to know they cared, they hadn't forgotten him, and they still loved him.How often do we miss these opportunities to be God's comfort in the lives of others? How often do we need to be by a friend's side when they're experiencing dark days? Or send a message to them—by text or snail mail or on the phone—just to say, I care.Hallmark Cards has coined the phrase, "When you care enough to send the very best.” When we as Christians care enough about each other, we can send our very best, which is the comfort of God pouring through us to those who need it.Is there someone in your life today that needs a Titus? Ask God to show you and allow him to use you as his agent of comfort and encouragement.
It's highly likely the burnout you and I experience, the frazzled nerves and frayed edges, are a result of taking on jobs God never intended for us, trying to be superwomen or supermen, thinking we can be all things to all people, never saying, “It's not my job.” And amid all those urgent voices, you and I have shortchanged what is important: the Word of God and prayer.You cannot allow others—no matter how well intentioned—to cause you to try to be or do what you're not supposed to be or do. You may disappoint them, but if you're going to be effective for God, you have to avoid the tendency to try to be all things to all people.It doesn't mean a life of ease with no pressures. I'm sure the hours will sometimes still be long, and exhaustion will still be a part of your life. But the more you submerge yourself into God's Word, the less frantic you’ll be, the more you'll know what God wants you to do and what he doesn't, the more peaceful and calm you can be as you face your heavy schedule.In his booklet, The Tyranny of the Urgent, Charles Hummel has a suggestion, which I think is excellent. He suggests in addition to that daily time of getting to know God, you set aside one hour a week for spiritual inventory, to evaluate what's happened over the past week and plan for the week ahead. To make certain your to-do list has the important things at the top.[1]To help you and me in that process, I've written a simple guideline to use for that spiritual inventory. If you are serious about getting your priorities in line, about spending time getting to know God, about weeding out the unimportant things on your list of priorities and putting God's Word and prayer at the top of your list, then you may find this guide for a weekly spiritual inventory helpful.You’ll find it here.I hope many of you will consider using this each week. I believe it will be a great help in getting you out of crisis mode and into a more God-centered lifestyle.---[1] Hummel, C. E. (1967). The Tyranny of the Urgent. Downers Grove, IL; Intervarsity Christian Fellowship.
Jesus could say at the end of his short earthly life, “I have finished the work which you gave me to do.” But I wonder how many of us will be able to say that. Are you doing what God has given you to do, or are you distracted and burned-out by trying to do urgent things that are not truly important?Though Jesus did much during his short earthly life, he didn't do everything everybody wanted him to do. He didn't heal all the sick, he didn't reach everyone. When so much was left undone, how could Jesus say he had finished his work? In his pamphlet, The Tyranny of the Urgent, Charles Hummel puts it so well, “Here is the secret of Jesus' life and work for God: He prayerfully waited for his Father's instructions and for the strength to follow them. Jesus...discerned the Father's will day by day in a life of prayer. By this means he warded off the urgent and accomplished the important.”[1]If you want to be free from burnout, free from being victimized by the loud voices of urgency that often surround you, you must remember what Jesus told us: If you continue in my word, you are truly my disciples, and you will know the truth and the truth will make you free (John 8:31-32). A life of prayer and a life of daily abiding in the Word of God is our key. How easy it is to let these truly important things be shoved aside by all those urgent voices.Urgent things usually have deadlines and time frames, while important things may not. Therefore, it's quite easy to do the urgent things, but leave the important things undone.Could it be you need to find balance in your life by making the main thing the main thing and not allowing those urgent voices to dictate your schedule? And at the top of your important list should be the commitment to spend substantial time in your pursuit of knowing the living God.---[1] Hummel, C. E. (1967). The Tyranny of the Urgent. Downers Grove, IL; Intervarsity Christian Fellowship.
I saw something in Scripture that just made my day. Why? Because it said to me it's okay to say, "That's not my job.” If you constantly struggle with priorities and feel as though you are being pulled apart by demands and responsibilities, this could be great news for you, too.One of the things I taught in my business seminars is you should never say, "It's not my job." But would you believe Jesus said that once? It's in Luke 12:13 and 14. In this passage, a man asked Jesus to be a judge, and Jesus said, Who appointed me an arbiter between you and your brother? In essence, he said, “That's not my job.”I can imagine this man figured Jesus was the right person to settle this argument between him and his brother. As they say, “If you want something done, ask a busy person to do it.” But Jesus told him he was not called, nor did he intend to become an earthly judge in human affairs. I'm sure he was not unkind about it, but he certainly was direct.In Mark 1:35-38 we see another example of a time when Jesus disappointed people. The whole town had gathered to hear him and be healed, and his disciples were most anxious for him to come and please this crowd. But Jesus decided he needed to go elsewhere, undoubtedly disappointing the crowd. You see, Jesus spent much time in prayer with his Father, and he knew his priorities very well.Jesus did not avoid these people because he was tired or because he did not care. No, he often gave of himself tirelessly, going without food and rest in order to minister to the many who came to him for help. He was frequently exhausted, but he was never feverish, never frazzled, never burned-out.Why? Because he knew what he was called to do, he knew what God's priorities were for him, and that's what he did, leaving other things undone. Sometimes people thought he should do other things, but he knew what was important and what wasn't.Burnout doesn't come from doing God's will; burnout is a result of not appropriately separating the urgent from the important, and this is one lesson I have to learn and re-learn.The irony of self-righteousness is it not only blinds us to our sin, but it also prevents us from loving others as Jesus commands. When you and I remember that we fall short of God’s perfect standard, we will be less inclined to point the finger when people around us do too.How might you be acting in hyper-critical, superior, or fault-finding ways toward others? Rather than being self-righteous, let’s remember we all fall short and live in light of the righteousness that is ours because of our faith in Christ. When we live this way, we display unity and draw others to Jesus.
I much prefer to be busy. Having nothing interesting or important to do is not where I want to be, and I find a full schedule forces me to be efficient, to manage my time more carefully, and therefore to get more accomplished.Frankly, I would be miserable if I were not busy. God designed us to be busy. Jesus was busy; the disciples were busy. They were no doubt stressed out at times. I don’t believe you’ll ever meet or know anyone whom you admire who is not a busy person.But I want to take a look at the downside of busyness; the potential bondage of busyness; the traps that are ready to swallow us if we don’t know how to set boundaries on busyness.As I see it—at least for myself—busyness issues come down to six questions we need to ask ourselves: Am I busy for the right reasons?This will cause you to look at what you’re doing and make sure you are doing what God wants you to do. It will cause you to examine your priorities. It should cause you to pray more about your activities and where you’re expending your time and energy.Ephesians 2:10: For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.God has a to-do list for you, and you will be busy when you know and do God’s will. For sure, God doesn’t approve of laziness or sitting on the sidelines and letting everyone else do the work. He wants us to be busy—but busy doing the right things, the things he has prepared in advance for each of us to do.If you’re busy just to achieve some personal success, or to prove something, or because you need to win the approval of someone else, then you’re busy for the wrong reasons. That kind of busyness will lead to burnout and stress, and it will never give the satisfaction you’re looking for.So, question number one is: Are you busy for the right reasons? Has busyness become my identity?We live in a world that honors busyness, that judges people based on how busy they are, and it is very easy to get caught up in this busy cycle as a sense of who we are. Since I tend to over-schedule at times and setting boundaries on my own busyness continues to be a challenge, I often do a self-check and make sure my self-worth is not based on my busyness. For me, that means offering up to God all I’m doing and once again acknowledging I am not my own, my schedule is not my own. My heavenly Father has a perfect right to change my schedule, to slow me down, to put me in another place with a totally different agenda.If you frequently talk about how busy you are and you’re uncomfortable or feel guilty when you have a free moment to yourself, it could be you’ve allowed busyness to become your identity, your sense of well-being, and that is not a good place to be. Do I take pride in my busyness?Have you noticed how some people play one-upmanship about how busy they are? They seem to be in competition to win the prize as the busiest persSome years ago, God began to reveal to me that I actually could be addicted to busyness, and I did take pride in it. People would make comments about my busyness, and I would take them as compliments. But then I began to see that being recognized for being busy was not necessarily a good thing. Did I really want that kind of image, so that people just thought of me as busy?So, I began to pray about this tendency, and I became intentional about not talking about how busy I was. Now, honestly, I cringe if anyone says something about how busy I am. Number one, I’m not that much busier than anyone else, but more importantly, that’s not how I want to be seen.In fact, I worked at changing my attitude toward my busyness. Instead of thinking of all I had to do and giving a litany of my to-do list, as a point of pride and/or a complaint, I began to say, “Aren’t you blessed to have a lot to do today? Wouldn’t you be miserable if you had nothing of value to do today?
Presented by Lisa BishopI want to examine something essential for our spiritual lives and for fostering unity in our Christian community, and that’s abiding in Jesus.Jesus himself gave us a key to unity in the body of Christ when he invited us to abide in him.Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me (John 15:4).When we abide in Jesus we remain, we dwell, we stay connected to him. It’s not just about having a fleeting connection with Jesus. It’s about staying deeply rooted in him—having a continual, ongoing relationship where his presence and love permeate every part of our lives.Unity in the community of believers flows from our connection to Jesus. In John 15:5, Jesus declares,I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing (John 15:5).When we are rooted in Jesus, we are drawn together in a shared experience of his love, grace, and truth.Think about it. If every individual Christian is abiding in Jesus, then we are all being shaped and transformed by him. We are being aligned with his heart, his will, and his purpose. This is the foundation of unity. When we stay close to Jesus, we’re not just growing individually; we’re growing together as one body in him.When we abide in Jesus, we are spiritually nourished and empowered to live lives that reflect his character—lives marked by love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23).As you and I bear spiritual fruit, we contribute to the overall health and unity of the body of Christ that reflects the power of God.In any community, there inevitably will be challenges and differences. But when we abide in Jesus, he gives us the grace to overcome division. His love and his truth unite us even in conflict. Unity in the body of Christ is not something we can manufacture on our own. It’s not about our efforts to get along with or to work things out in our own strength. True unity comes when we, as individuals and as a community, abide in him.How are you abiding in Jesus? Spending time in God’s word and prayer are ways we stay connected and grow. And remember that prayer is a dialogue, not a monologue. Create space for God to speak into your circumstances and relationships and to transform your life. When we take time to simply be still, practice gratitude, and praise him for who he is, we develop a stronger connection and sense of his presence. When we abide in Jesus, we not only benefit but his love binds us together in perfect unity.
Presented by Lisa BishopWe’ve been examining ways we can foster unity in community. When the Bible calls us to be of one mind, unified in Christ, it does not mean we will always see eye to eye. But there are attitudes and behaviors we are called to display as we work toward a spirit of unity. Yesterday we talked about how to respond when we feel wronged. Rather than retaliate, pay people back with a blessing. That behavior in and of itself will show the world around us a better way and put the glory of God on display. Today I want to dive in a little deeper and talk about another essential aspect of seeking unity in community, and that is forgiveness.In any community, especially one as diverse as the body of Christ, conflicts will arise. Differences in opinions, misunderstandings, and hurts will inevitably occur. But forgiveness is the glue that keeps unity intact.Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you (Colossians 3:13).Forgiveness is at the very heart of the gospel.Think about it—our sin against God is far greater than any offense we might face from another person. And yet, God, in his infinite mercy, sent his son, Jesus, to die for us while we were still his enemies. The forgiveness we offer is not based on whether others deserve it, but solely because Christ has forgiven us, even though we didn’t deserve it. When we forgive others, we mirror the heart of God, we release others from the debt we feel they owe us, extend the grace God has shown us, and we open the door for reconciliation and restoration.Forgiveness is the means by which we break down walls of division and build bridges of peace. As a follower of Jesus, forgiveness is not an option, it is to be a regular practice in our lives.Are there people with whom you were once in community but perhaps you experienced a riff and the falling out caused you to fall away from the friendship? If there is anyone in your life you may be harboring unforgiveness toward, can I encourage you to take the first step in making amends?You know forgiveness is God’s idea, and it is a very big deal to him. If you are harboring any hurt or resentment, give it to God and ask him to help you get your heart in a posture of forgiveness. Extend the proverbial olive branch and do your part to clear up any division in your relationships. The enemy loves discord but as believers, we can’t afford to have divisions among us. We need each other.Remember, the body of Christ is not made up of perfect people; it is made up of redeemed sinners like you and me who are bound together by the love of Jesus. And when we forgive one another, we strengthen that bond.
Presented by Lisa BishopI’m glad you have joined me today. This week we’re looking at attitudes and behaviors that foster unity in community. Community matters to God, and how we act toward one another is essential, as we carry out our calling as ambassadors of Jesus.So today, let’s look at what 1 Peter 3:8-9 has to teach us about living out our oneness in Christ.Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing (1 Peter 3:8-9).When Peter says to be of one mind, he is not saying that we will agree on everything. He is implying a unity of aim and purpose. When we seek to live in unity with one another, it is a mindset and a heart set on honoring and glorifying Jesus with the way we conduct ourselves. We know our aim on this earth is to love and follow Jesus and to live out the great command to make disciples of all nations—to draw people to a saving relationship with Christ. And we cannot do that well if we do not love each other well.We need to love one another, guard against a prideful attitude, and demonstrate humility; be compassionate toward one another and mindful to guard against all unnecessary contention. And perhaps Peter gives one of the most difficult challenges when he tells us to not repay evil for evil. It can be so easy to fight back when we feel offended or mistreated. Paybacks can feel good and justified in the moment, but revenge is an act of the flesh. It takes a lot of self-control and a working of the Holy Spirit to instead pay back with a blessing. And it’s not the southern expression, “Oh bless your heart” type of blessing that Peter is talking about, which is really no blessing at all. It’s instead truly wishing good for that person. I can say is not always my first inclination to heap blessings on people especially when I feel wronged, but when we genuinely bless people, it is a demonstration to the power of Christ working in us. We are no longer controlled by our earthly nature that wants to get even or counterattack.We strongly heed the instruction of Galatians 5:16-17.Walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh (Galatians 5:16-17).We bestow blessing because it is an act of obedience, it is what God has called us to do. And we know whenever God calls you and I to do something, he also equips and empowers us to carry it out. That is the power of the gospel at work in our lives. When we are so easily triggered and reactive, we fail to recognize that we can in fact instead be controlled by the Holy Spirit and allow him to help us with our actions and reactions. But it requires surrender. When you find yourself tempted to be reactionary and retaliate with your words when you feel wronged, take time to pause. Confess your feelings to the Lord and ask the Holy Spirit to take control. When the fruit of the Spirit is evident in our lives, we show the world a better way and live out our purpose to point people to Jesus.
Presented by Lisa BishopUnity is a powerful force, isn’t it? It strengthens relationships, enables us to accomplish more together, and most importantly, reflects the love and nature of God to the world around us. But unity is not something that just happens automatically. It requires intentional effort, humility, and a focus on our common purpose in Christ.I don’t know about you but when I think about the idea of unity, I automatically think it means agreement. But the truth is we will not always see eye to eye, think exactly alike, or have the same opinions. Yet, we can still be a community that puts the love of Jesus on display and lives in unity even when we disagree. And it’s not if we will disagree, it’s when. Ultimately, what matters is how we show up in the midst of our conflicts.Unity is an attitude of heart and is possible even when we see things from opposing perspectives. We need to be reminded as believers we are all united in Christ which unites us with one another. How we act towards each other matters. It’s critical to our witness as followers of Jesus. If we are backbiting, dissing, or speaking in disparaging ways toward others, especially fellow followers of Christ, we are giving the world a terrible representation of the gospel. As God’s image bearers we must, by the power of the Holy Spirit, show the world a higher and better way and point them to Christ by the way we act toward one another.Ephesians 4:29-32 gives us sound instruction on attitudes and behaviors to get rid of and pursue to work toward unity:Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you (Ephesians 4:29-32).If you were to take inventory of your words this past week, did they benefit those who heard them, or were they, as Paul says, unwholesome—meaning useless, rotten, or unfit for use? Do our words sow discord or harmony? It can be so easy, especially these days, to get riled up and let our flesh draw us into bitterness, rage, anger, brawling, and slander. But we must realize and resist the schemes of the enemy and instead be overpowered by the Holy Spirit. In order to be overpowered by the Spirit we need to be in tune with the Spirit, and we can only do that when we regularly spend time in God’s Word and meditate on scripture, which grows our ability to sense God’s presence, hear his voice, and follow his ways.And finally, let’s remember we grieve the Holy Spirit when we fail to maintain peace and harmony in the body of Christ so let’s instead follow Paul's words and choose to act in ways that create unity.
Presented by Lisa BishopAre you self-righteous? What an opening question, isn’t it? I would venture to say there are times in our lives when we have been self-righteous, and self-righteous behavior can jeopardize relationships and destroy community. As followers of Jesus, you and I are called to be a community that loves one another. But how do we do that well?We’re looking at what the Bible says about our dispositions, mindsets, and attitudes and how we are to behave in a way that fosters unity.All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and all are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus (Romans 3:23-24).All have sinned and fallen short. That includes you and me. This biblical truth should keep us humble. But when we focus on the shortcomings of others and forget to look in the mirror, self-righteousness can rear its ugly head and wreak havoc on community. Self-righteousness often sneaks into our lives when we start comparing ourselves and our actions to others instead of measuring ourselves against God's perfect standard.We can fall into the self-righteousness trap when we are critical and judgmental of others and become overly confident in ourselves and our own moral superiority.We might think, “I’m more faithful than that person,” or “At least I don’t act that way or struggle with that sin.”Jesus gave us a powerful warning about self-righteousness in Luke 18, when he told this parable.Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other people—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted (Luke 18:10-14).The irony of self-righteousness is it not only blinds us to our sin, but it also prevents us from loving others as Jesus commands. When you and I remember that we fall short of God’s perfect standard, we will be less inclined to point the finger when people around us do too.How might you be acting in hyper-critical, superior, or fault-finding ways toward others? Rather than being self-righteous, let’s remember we all fall short and live in light of the righteousness that is ours because of our faith in Christ. When we live this way, we display unity and draw others to Jesus.
Presented by Lisa BishopDo you remember the game show, “Who Wants to be a Millionaire?” The show featured a quiz competition where contestants could win a top prize of $1,000,000 if they correctly answered a series of 15 multiple-choice questions. When the contestant picked the right answer, they banked some cash and advanced to the next question. The questions increased in difficulty, and for every correct answer, the amount of prize money increased. If the contestant was stumped and did not know the answer, they were given three lifelines to use throughout the game. The lifelines allowed them to seek help and advice in choosing the correct answer so they could keep playing.One of the lifelines was appropriately named, “phone a friend.”If the contestant found themselves in a pickle and did not know the correct answer, the gameshow got the friend on the line, read them the question, and together they would discern the best answer.Before appearing on the game show the contestant had already discerned and picked who they would call if they needed some wisdom. I assume they gave it some hard-earned and measured thought knowing their chance of advancing in the game or going home empty rode on the wisdom and input from their friend. The probability of staying in the game and winning wasn’t a solo act. It was only possible when the contestant reached out to their lifelines for assistance.As I reflected on the “Who Wants to Be a Millionaire” lifelines, it got me thinking about the importance of lifelines in everyday life. So often, these lifelines come in the form of community—the relationships where we act as one another’s lifelines. Who are your lifelines? In other words, who are the people in your life who you prayerfully and intentionally choose to surround yourself with? Who are the people you do life with, invest in, call on for wisdom, or simply for genuine connection?Who is your community? There is a richness to life and thriving in our faith that is only possible when we take the time and make the effort to build up and sow into relationships. It can be easy and tempting to drift into isolation or not make intentional time to forge and deepen connections. But having people in your life, especially fellow believers, is important if you want to flourish in your personal life, work life, home life, really any aspects of life.This applies whether you are single, married, have kids, or don’t. If you are married and have a family of your own, even you need to venture out of the walls of your household and create deep connections with others. This can seem obvious, right? Yet, sometimes it is easier said than done.Now you may be thinking, “I’m good. I have solid relationships in my life.” That’s great! Hang with me, because even if you do, I’m confident you will take something away. And if you are on the opposite end of the spectrum, finding yourself lacking kinship, my hope is that you will be encouraged to find connection and build authentic community.We know from a biblical perspective, community is not presented as an option. It’s a central part of God's design. From the very beginning in Genesis, after creating Adam, God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone” (Genesis 2:18). God deemed that we are created to build relationships and be part of something bigger than ourselves. You and I are wired for connection, companionship, and the unique bond that comes when we share our lives, our experiences, and our faith with each other.Jesus himself modeled this beautifully. Throughout his ministry, we rarely see him alone. Instead, he gathered himself around a community of disciples. He poured into their lives, taught them, served with them, prayed with them, and even in moments of hardship, he surrounded himself with others. It was in this community that he revealed some of his deepest teachings and shared some of his most powerful moments.
What is it that uses up your emotional, physical, and spiritual energy and leaves you living in "overdrawn" mode too much of the time? I conclude my thoughts today on living a balanced life. I mentioned you spend energy needlessly when you try to do more than you should, and when you surround yourself with too much stuff. Your strength is also used up when you have money problems. Credit cards can be our downfall. You might need to get on a budget and stop this drain on your life. Your strength is used up when you are not disciplined. Proverbs says we die from lack of discipline, and I believe with all my heart many of us are drained of energy because we refuse needed discipline in our lives.I've started to think about it this way: Each day I start out with a certain amount in my emotional, physical and spiritual account—and they are very much interrelated. I must learn to spend that amount wisely. Let's say I start with $100 in that account today.Now, early in the day I get frustrated because of traffic problems and I foolishly spend $20 of energy on it. As I arrive at work, I encounter a rude customer on the phone, and I spend $25 of emotional energy on that. Then that co-worker irritates me again, and without realizing it, I've spent $15 there. My boss puts another deadline on me, and that stress costs me $30. Then I make a mistake and get mad at myself for that failure and spend $20 on that, and before noon I'm broke! I'm overdrawn!Now the rest of the day I'm living out of balance, so I'm much more likely to say things I shouldn't say, react poorly, have a bad attitude, feel fatigued, depressed, discouraged, etc. Tell the truth, did you ever have that kind of day when you foolishly spent your energy on things that didn't really matter?We have to get better, by God's grace, at spending our energy. Pick your fights; don't let the little stuff beat you down. Pray at all those points of irritation—quick prayers asking God to give you perspective and put that energy back into your account so it's there for the important things.Remember, to live in balanced mode, not overdrawing your emotional, physical, and spiritual accounts. You've got to make the right deposits and then spend your energy wisely on things that have some significance. This will help you make better choices about priorities and keep your perspective on what's important and what isn't. I encourage you to make it your goal, by God's grace, to live in a balanced way.
Where do you get the strength you need to love others and to keep from being burned-out and frayed around the edges all too often? I've examined what you need to deposit into your energy bank account so you are not living an out-of-balance life.A.W. Tozer once say, “Shakespeare said something to the effect that no man could be a philosopher when he had a toothache! While it is possible to be a weary saint, it is scarcely possible to be weary and feel saintly.”[1]When your body is not in the best condition, either from sickness or fatigue, your strength can fail. That's why it’s important to be a good steward of your body, doing everything you can to keep it strong and vital.Now, let's talk about the things which drain our energy. First, there are the inescapable drains on our energy, such as getting up in the morning, children, mates, family, housework, jobs. But many times, we expend energy, even in these areas, unnecessarily. Let's identify a few of the foolish things that often drain our strength: Your strength is used up when you try to do more than you can do. God has not called you to be all things to all people.Jesus was careful where he went to minister. He didn't try to go to every city; he didn't heal every sick person; he didn't preach to everyone on the face of the earth. Yet he could say at the end of a very short three-year ministry that he had accomplished what his father sent him to do.Have you got too many irons in the fire? Are you trying to prove something to yourself by taking on too much? Or perhaps, like me, you just have so much you want to do you can't resist. Maybe you have a hard time saying "No.” Whatever causes you to over-commit, you need to get this area under control. Your strength is used up when you have too much stuff. Did you know the more you have, the more energy it takes out of you?Cleaned your closets out lately? Might be a good idea. A home or apartment full of valued "treasures" can be a real drainer of energy. Now I'm not suggesting we can't have things we enjoy, but the question is, do you enjoy them or are they just sapping your time and energy?---[1] Tozer, A. W. (n.d.). Taking Time to Rest. SermonIndex.net. https://www.sermonindex.net/modules/articles/index.php?view=article&aid=5278
Is your life out of balance? Are you spending more from your spiritual, emotional, and physical account than you're putting in? I'm examining what we can do to put energy into our reserves, so we don't live in an overdrawn, out-of-balance condition. We saw yesterday that one great source of energy is joy.Another source of strength comes from fellowship with other believers and loving relationships with friends and family.They devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer (Acts 2:42).One of the great things about being a marketplace Christian the way your job forces you into daily interaction with non-believers. But living and working with those who do not share your faith and your love of Jesus can be a large drain on your inner resources. You need times of fellowship to give you strength; you need church every week; you need small support groups of Bible study and prayer.I strongly encourage you to be involved in a small support group. You need a few people you regularly interact with, where you can be open and honest, where you are accountable, and where you are totally accepted. People you could call in the middle of the night, if necessary, for prayer support. If you have one or two people like that in your life, it will pour enormous strength into you, spiritually, emotionally and mentally.If you don't, cultivate such a support group. Start it yourself. I'm sure you can find one or two others who feel like you do and need your support, as you do theirs. It will strengthen you immensely.We also need those personal relationships from which we gain strength. You may be married to someone who truly strengthens you. Marriage was intended by God to be a source of strength.We need close relationships with friends and family. You don't have to have a lot, but you need one or two. Do you have that person who really cares about the details of your life, where you can let your hair down and be understood and accepted even when you don't have it all together? If not, I encourage you to pray for that relationship and be that kind of support to someone else.
Is your energy account overdrawn? Are you living in a fatigued, burned-out, out-of-balance lifestyle? It could be because you don't deposit enough in your emotional, physical and spiritual energy accounts to cover the checks you draw on them. In order to stay in balance, you must first make certain you make the right deposits. Think with me about what is needed to ensure your account is continually replenished.We know from Scripture our strength comes first of all from God's Word.My soul is weary with sorrow; strengthen me according to your word (Psalm 119:28).The Word of God is our resource to get us through times of weariness and stress. The Psalmist said it would strengthen us.If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you (John 15:7).This is an incredible blank check given to us by our Lord Jesus. How often do you draw on it? By allowing the Words of Jesus to abide in us, we are given this blank check of resources. Maybe the real problem is we don't want to, or don't know how, or for some reason just don't allow God's words to abide in us.What does it mean to remain in Jesus and allow his words to remain in us? Well, it means time spent reading, meditating, and studying God's Word. Significant time. Do you do that regularly? As a child of God, your life will always be out of balance until you have a steady diet of the Bible in your life.Our strength also comes from the joy of the Lord within us.Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength (Nehemiah 8:10).A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones (Proverbs 17:22).Remember joy is not synonymous with happiness. Joy is that deeper, abiding sense of completeness which is present even when circumstances are not happy or enjoyable.David prayed, "Restore to me the joy of my salvation." Harboring any known sin will keep you out of fellowship with the Lord; then you lose your joy and that drains your account. You need to pour that joy in by keeping a clean slate with the Lord. Also, if you think about the wrong things, your joy will be robbed. Negative thoughts, critical thoughts, judgmental thoughts, complaining thoughts—these will all rob you of joy, and joy is essential for a balanced life.
Have you ever tried to take more out of your bank account than you put in? If so, then you know the meaning of the term "overdrawn.” Could it be you are living emotionally, physically, and spiritually in the overdrawn mode? Your life truly can be very out of balance when you don't deposit enough in your emotional, spiritual, and physical accounts to cover the checks you draw on them. When that happens, you live an overdrawn, out-of-balance life, and you fight fatigue, discouragement, and depression.This type of out-of-balance living is often because we don't deposit the right things in our accounts, and at other times it's because we spend our energy very foolishly. We need to know what it is that feeds energy and strength to us and make certain we're pouring into our lives the right resources and the right amount. Then we need to determine what uses our resources and drains our strength so we can balance the two.This calls for an accounting procedure, and that's something we need to do regularly. You have to check the balance in your bank account and make sure it’s in good order. The same is true of your emotional, spiritual, and physical accounts.Ask yourself: Am I spending more from my spiritual and physical account than I put in? Frankly, I continually have to face this problem because I often need to re-learn that I cannot be all things to all people, nor can I do all the things I want to do. I must set priorities, learn when to say no, and take time to replenish my accounts so I can keep doing the things God wants me to do.Now, that doesn't mean I'm never tired, never feel stressed or rushed or stretched, but it does mean if I'm living in that out-of-balance mode all the time, something's wrong. My priorities are confused, or my discipline has broken down, or my calendar is too full, or I don't know how to say no—or some combination of all the above.This week I'm going to try to give you some help in this process of bringing your emotional, physical, and spiritual accounts into balance. And I do this mostly because I need to re-learn it too. Wouldn't it be nice if we only had to learn our lessons once! But we’re often in retraining mode.
The subtitle for the book, My One Word, is “Change your life with just one word.” You may be thinking, “How can one word change my life?” I admit, it sounds like a bit of an overstatement, but words have power. When you look at the 29 times words are referred to in Proverbs, you will see words can be perverse and seductive; they can ensnare you and pierce you like a sword. Or, on the other hand, words can be wise and insightful. They can be just and pure. They can bring healing and comfort; they can be gracious and sweet. Words have the power of life and death.So, choosing a word—the right word—to focus on for an entire year can indeed bring personal change and spiritual formation in your life. It’s not a self-help program; it’s a way to change your thought life—to see things through God’s eyes. And when you and I become truly focused on changing our attitudes and our thought patterns, we open ourselves to wonderful changes by the power of God’s Spirit.How do you choose your one word for 2025? Well, first think about some things you would like to change about yourself. For example, patience might be an area you know you need improvement. Or discernment; that was one of my words in the past, as I recognized I am not naturally a discerning person.Or you might choose a word that exemplifies areas where you want to grow, such as wisdom or thankfulness. As you think and pray about what your one word will be for 2025, you will be amazed at how that process will lead you to the right word for you.Here is an example from the book of a word that someone chose:My word for the year is PAUSE. In my busy life there are so many times I need to pause. Pause to remember these days, for they will fly by so quickly. Pause to say yes...and no. Pause to give thanks. Pause before I speak in anger, judgment, or criticism. Pause to say I’m sorry. Pause to dwell on God’s goodness and mercy.[1]What a great word to choose for 2025. Do you see how many areas of your life could be dramatically affected if you focused on the word pause for one year? To focus on your one word just means you will pray about it regularly—daily—and seek God’s power to effect the changes he wants to make in your life through that word. Then you would do a search in the Bible for passages relating to your one word.For example, if pause were your word, some verses you might choose are:Psalm 46:10: “Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.”Psalm 91:1: Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.Psalm 116:7: Return to your rest, my soul, for the Lord has been good to you.I would recommend that after you choose your one word, you begin a journal of how God is using this one word in your life. Keep track of all the verses that come to you throughout the year as a reminder of what this one word means for your life. If you seriously commit to focusing on that one word, praying it into your life, and asking God to empower you to make it a reality in your life, you will be amazed at how your one word has truly changed your life.Here’s what another woman wrote about her one word:I am an intensely shy person. I avoid confrontation at all costs. And I only share my faith when it happens into a conversation. The idea of BOLDNESS, of being a truly bold Christian, is seriously out of my comfort zone. But it seems that this is God’s challenge for me this year. I am to actively pursue BOLDNESS and be transformed in the process. So here I go—man, this is intimidating![2]This is an example of choosing a word that pushes you out of your comfort zone and teaches you to trust God in new ways. God might put this kind of word on your heart—something that even frightens you, but you know God wants to do a new work in you in that area. For example, that word might be boundaries, where you recognize your weakness in setting appropriate boundar...
Presented by Lauren StibgenWhat in your life needs healing? When we think of healing, we quickly think of our physical bodies—healing from sickness, recovery from surgery, or something worse like a diagnosis. But healing can be so much more. God is our great healer, and foundationally, the first thing he wants to heal us from forever is sin.On hearing this, Jesus said to them, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners” (Mark 2:17).Maybe you don’t feel sick with sin, or on the other end of the spectrum, maybe you don’t feel like your sin rises to the need of a healer. Our ultimate healer is God, Jehovah Rapha. The truth of the matter is we are all sick with sin, not one greater than the other.For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23).It isn’t that some of you sin; it is all. And, going back to omnipresence, God is in all places at all times at once. More than this, God is omniscient. Simply, God knows everything! There is no hiding this sin.Thankfully, God sent his only son, Jesus to die on the cross for our sins—the ultimate sacrifice of love for us!But what about the other healing—the physical or mental well-being healing we often turn to God for? Jehovah Rapha promises this too.He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds (Psalm 147:3).Nevertheless, I will bring health and healing to it; I will heal my people and will let them enjoy abundant peace and security (Jeremiah 33:6).Not only does God want health and healing for us but he also wants for our abundance, prosperity, and security. Amid a trial, especially when you need physical or mental healing, it can be hard to imagine abundance, prosperity, and security.Ultimately, we won’t fully experience this until heaven. We know God will wipe away every tear from our eyes in heaven.We are citizens of heaven here on earth and until we find ourselves in heaven, we need to lean into knowing more about God and all of his names. After all, he is Emmanuel, God with us, a provider, the best at seeing us at our best and worst, the very best listener, and the ultimate healer!
Presented by Lauren StibgenYesterday we learned God is omnipresent—in all places, at all times, at once. He sees us. But God also hears us, even when we are not speaking!You have searched me, Lord, and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar (Psalm 139: 1-2).Psalm 139 is clear. God can discern our thoughts. Even when you are thinking something, God is Elohim Shama—a God who hears.Even so, God loves when we talk to him directly though prayer!Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:6-7).Work, family, and life in general can be frustrating. Sometimes, absent of someone to vent to, we can keep our feelings stored up. This can add to stress and even cause despair if it goes on for long enough. Especially at work, there can be challenges that are hard to speak with others about. Maybe it is a conflict with a colleague or boss, or perhaps you are contemplating a new position. Perhaps you were unhappy about feedback you received. Or, on the opposite end of this, you are happy you received a great review. God wants to hear from us!He asks we bring everything to him. Everything. With “everything” in mind, think about the last time you were angry with God about something. What about that time you told a small lie? Or maybe you are weighing a very heavy personal decision. God wants to hear about this too. In fact, you honor God in prayer because he already knows and discerns your every thought!Maybe you feel like you don’t know what to pray or how to pray. That’s ok too. The Holy Spirit can help us in our weakness.We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans (Romans 8:26).The Holy Spirit intercedes for us! Whether it is God discerning our thoughts, or the Holy Spirit interceding, we also need to give thanksgiving to God.In the moments when we feel defeated and unheard, sometimes the only thing we can give to God is the thanksgiving that you know he is Elohim Shama—the God who hears you.God provides for me, sees me, hears me.
Presented by Lauren StibgenSometimes it just feels like I blend in. Do I really matter at all? If I am honest, this mantra can play out in every area of my life: work, home, ministry, parenting. You name it. I feel small, unseen. I know I am not alone, and much of this small and unseen feeling stems from forgetting our identity starts with El Roi—a God who sees me.I am sure most of you have heard the terms omniscient, omnipresent, and omnipotent. For now, let’s focus on omnipresent. This means God is present everywhere at the same time. In this big world he created, he sees me and you right now—in this moment. As we start this new year, let’s rest in this omnipresence of God. Pause for a moment and think about it. Maybe you are setting forth plans for this year or reminiscing on what was. Maybe you are feeling small and unseen. Maybe you are dealing with sin that is hidden. In each of these scenarios God is El Roi—a God who sees.Just when you think you are alone, whether it is with a thought, feeling, or, well, sin, you realize you are always seen. You are seen in each moment, watched over in your rest. God sees.Perhaps this is comforting to you, like it was to Hagar. In Genesis we learn Sarai gives Hagar to Abram to bear a child because she is barren. When she becomes pregnant, Sarai becomes cruel and Hagar departs, alone into the desert. God provides for her, and even speaks to her in this low moment!She gave this name to the Lord who spoke to her: “You are the God who sees me,” for she said, “I have now seen the One who sees me” (Genesis 16:13).I have felt put off, alone, wandering, and in need of provision. I can empathize with Hagar. She was doing what she was asked by someone she trusted. The result was not what she expected. She was alone—except she wasn’t.Perhaps the thought of God seeing you causes fear. The path you are on has some unrepented sin he sees. There is not one moment you are not alone with God. The good news is this is the best time to talk to God!If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness (1 John 1:9).Whether comfort or fear, take heart. El Roi—the God who sees—loves you and wants for your good.
Presented by Lauren StibgenAs a working woman, you could have several different reasons you go to work. God created us for work.Sometimes this “work” can be paid. Sometimes this “work” can be volunteer based. Either way, we are Christian working women. Our roles span from grocery clerks to CEOs, ministry workers to sole proprietors running our own business. Whatever “work” we find ourselves doing, we need to look for our strength in God—Jehovah Jireh, God our provider.Maybe like me, you are the sole financial provider for your family. Or you work alongside your spouse to provide for your family’s needs. Perhaps your work is as an unpaid volunteer. There isn’t one right or wrong reason to go to work whether the work is paid or unpaid, but the implications of financial security for ourselves and our loved ones can create stress and a reliance on self that isn’t what God wants for us at all. In revealing himself to us as Jehovah Jireh, we can better understand his will for our work.Maybe your work just seems impossible. It is something you must do, but it isn’t something you really love to do. Perhaps you aren’t making enough to make ends meet, which makes the going even more difficult. Maybe you have been an unpaid volunteer, but with tight finances, you need to go back to work. All of this can be a drain on our strength and can lead us into deep self-reliance.God often will call us to do hard things. In Genesis 22:13-14 God calls Abraham to hard work. God calls Abraham to sacrifice his beloved son Isaac. In obedience and great faith, Abraham sets out in obedience to God. And, just in the final moments, God provides a ram to take the place of Isaac. In the right moment God supplies Abraham with just what he needs.If your work seems impossible, the stress of financial needs seems insurmountable, or the job hunt seems never ending, know the Lord will provide for you. His will for our work is to seek him first in all things, because God is our ultimate provider.And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:19).Are you leaning into God as Jehovah Jireh? What do you need to lay before him today?
Presented by Lauren StibgenAre you anything like me? I find myself wondering how another year is coming to a close. The older I get, the faster they seem to go. Honestly, sometimes I am just tired. Competing priorities of work, family and attempting to maintain some semblance of wellness during our most gluttonous time of year has me feeling weak. While I am in a good habit of starting my day in God’s word and journaling, sometimes the time is hurried. How much do I “know” God?One of the ways I am drawing near to God this season is through studying his names. You have heard a lot about Emmanuel this season, as we celebrated the birth of Jesus. It’s the beautiful name that reminds us God is with us, but this week I want to focus on some of the other names of God.Emmanuel reminds me of the one and only gift that Jesus is. God as man. He walked this life to rescue the sinner like me with the ultimate sacrifice of his life on the cross. This reminds me God is relational, and he wants me to know him and be in relationship with him.As working women, it is easy to let life get the best of us like I mentioned above. Perhaps as you approach year end, finances are tight. Maybe finances aren’t only tight, but you are looking for work.With the end of the year, maybe you are in the process of performance evaluations at work. You feel like you have done so much but it is evident no one sees it like you do.As a working mom, maybe you are asking for some extra helping hands during the holidays from your spouse or children and they aren’t hearing you.And, overall, you are feeling down, or maybe all of this has taken a physical toll on your body.The Bible is full of reminders about our God. He is our provider. He sees us. He hears us. And God is our healer.What I have come to understand is God wants to be my everything. The names he uses to describe himself to me are all reminders that he is truly all I need.If you need extra strength for this season like me, join me this week as we consider the names of God: Jehovah Jireh, El Roi, Elohim Shama, and Jehovah Rapha.
Presented by Lauren StibgenFor many women the creation story in Genesis feels like a story of their subordination to men. Afterall, God made Adam first. In Genesis 2:18, God says, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.” Out of everything in creation there was “not a helper found fit for him.” Different than everything in creation, even Adam, Eve was made from the rib of Adam. She was the only part of creation that was not formed from the ground.While we are blessed with the details in Genesis 2, we learn in Genesis 1 that God created man “in our image, after our likeness.” Specifically in Genesis 1:27 it says, “So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.” And in verse 28, “And God blessed them.”Although God created Adam first and Eve specially for him, we forget this happened on the 6th day. There wasn’t some terrific lag in time, and there was certainly not a connotation of the woman being less. Both man and woman were created in Imago Dei—the image of God.Genesis 2:18 is where we see the reference to “Ezer” or helper. As it is with many Bible translations, our definition of helper in English in not adequate to describe Ezer.In the Oxford dictionary, we see help as a verb, noun and an exclamation. The verb help is defined as making it easier for someone to do something by offering services, or to serve someone with food or drink. The noun is the action of helping someone. And the exclamation—needing urgent assistance. All this insinuates assistance in some form or fashion.Now, don’t get me wrong. God absolutely wants us to be this type of helper—and I will come back to this—but the definition and its connotations fail in comparison to the type of helper God made the first woman to be (and arguably every woman thereafter made in God’s image). If we know God is described as Jehovah Ezrah and we also know women are created to bare the image of God, we can begin to imagine just how significant it is to be an Ezer in the kingdom of God.Unfortunately, after the fall in Genesis 4, the sin nature of man shifted to a dominating, patriarchal role, but this does not mean this is God’s plan for women and men! We know God is redeeming both men and women in his Kingdom through salvation in Christ Jesus, but we are still sinful. This, coupled with our poor English translation has created patterns in how we think of women and work that have made certain roles feel “less than”.Culturally, the word helper has been used for roles that women would take to offer assistance. Teacher’s helper, Sunday school helper, lunchroom helper, field trip helper. Somewhere along the line we became more sophisticated and inserted the word chaperone, but helper was very prevalent. These roles in a classroom or at a school were reserved for stay-at-home moms. Women who worked could not find a place as this type of helper. While I think this is less pervasive today with more women at work, I know this is something many of the women in our ministry struggle with.As working women, they often cannot be this type of helper, and they would like to be. Or perhaps they have a husband who fills the role of helper in this way. Men often face being one among many women still to this day. I know my husband is the primary teacher for our homeschooled son, and he is the only male hall helper in our homeschool cooperative.Beyond these helper titles in settings that involve children, there are connotations surrounding titles that women hold at work. While some men are holding these titles today, we spent a lot of time making women “helpers” in the workforce. What do I mean by this? Assistants. These positions were held only by women. Honestly, what type of candidate pool of Administrative Assistant staff are men? Even today? Men make up on 11% of the administrative pool in the United States. Why the gender imbalance? Well,
Everybody needs encouragement and help at times, don't they? As I read 2 Corinthians 7, I realized even the great Apostle Paul had his bad times when he needed other people.For when we came into Macedonia, this body of ours had no rest, but we were harassed at every turn—conflicts on the outside, fears within (2 Corinthians 7:5).Doesn't that describe the way you feel at times? Conflicts without, fears within? But this is the spiritual giant, Paul, and it surprises us to realize he would have these same feelings. We really need to remember that positions of prominence do not isolate anyone from being human. Paul was tired and fearful. He needed help.Where did his help come from? He goes on to say, "But God, who comforts the downcast, comforted us by the coming of Titus.” He needed a friend at his side to comfort him, and so Titus came along. We could say to Paul, "But wasn't it enough to have the Lord there?” And Paul would respond, "The Lord was there in the person of Titus. He comforted me by sending Titus."Yes indeed, that's how the Body of Christ should function. God wants to use us in each other's lives as messengers of comfort and encouragement, to pick up each other at those weary and frightening moments of our lives. God has given us each other for that purpose.Paul goes on to say he was comforted by the good report Titus brought to him of his friend’s concern for his welfare. Paul needed to know they cared. They hadn't forgotten him; they still loved him.How often do we miss these opportunities to be God's comfort in the lives of others? How often do we need to be by a friend's side when they're experiencing dark days? Or send a message to them—by email, on the phone—just to say, I care.Hallmark Cards has coined the phrase, "When you care enough to send the very best.” When we as Christians care enough about each other, we can send our very best, which is the comfort of God pouring through us to those who need it.Is there someone in your life today that needs a Titus? Ask God to show you and allow him to use you as his agent of comfort and encouragement.
I know at this time of year many people are especially lonely.God sets the lonely in families, he leads out the prisoners with singing; but the rebellious live in a sun-scorched land (Psalm 68:6).I have found this verse to be exactly true in my life. As I have allowed God to make a home for me and to accept his presence as sufficient in my life, I have been set free from the awful heaviness of loneliness.That verse says only the rebellious dwell in a parched land. When we refuse to allow God to be our cure for loneliness, when we continue to try to do it our way and fill the empty void with people and activities, we'll continue to find loneliness our companion. Your feelings of loneliness may be because you are still rebelling against God's answers. You don't like the idea of learning to let him fill up your empty time and change your lonely feelings. As long as you continue to rebel, you will continue to live in that parched land of loneliness.But there’s no doubt God created us for fellowship and companionship, and we need people in our lives, too. When Jesus was facing crucifixion, he took his three closest companions with him while he prayed. He needed God’s presence, and he needed their presence and support. The Apostle Paul spoke of his need to be with his companions and his encouragers.If you are lonely because you don’t have good friends or they’re not nearby, I would remind you that in order to have friends, you have to reach out to others and be a friend. Ask yourself what you could do for someone else to be their friend, to meet their need, instead of waiting for someone to be your friend. We reap what we sow—that’s a biblical principle. If you want friendships, sow friendships; become a friend to others.Loneliness can be very crippling, and it is at epidemic levels these days. But you can take positive steps—by God’s grace—to overcome those depressing feelings of loneliness. Of course, the most important step to take is to spend time developing your relationship with Jesus through Bible study and prayer. He is a friend who sticks closer than a brother, and believe me, he is capable of filling that lonely space inside of you.
Merry Christmas! Perhaps you’re gathering with family to open gifts and eat great food, or maybe it’s a quiet day for you. However you are celebrating today, the team here at The Christian Working Woman is here to wish you a blessed day. We just want to send you words of joy, reminding all of us of the miracle we are celebrating today.I’ll begin with this passage from Mary’s Magnificat, the amazing words she spoke as she visited her cousin Elizabeth. Here she is, a very young woman who will bear the Son of God, and she said:My soul magnifies the Lord, and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, for he has looked on the humble estate of his servant. For behold, from now on all generations will call me blessed; for he who is mighty has done great things for me, and holy is his name (Luke 1:46-49).Here’s a familiar passage from the prophet Isaiah:For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. Of the greatness of his government and peace there will be no end. He will reign on David’s throne and over his kingdom, establishing and upholding it with justice and righteousness from that time on and forever. The zeal of the Lord Almighty will accomplish this (Isaiah 9:5-7).And the Apostle Paul said this:Who, [Jesus Christ] being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death—even death on a cross! Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father (Philippians 2:6-11).Remember—you are deeply loved by the Savior of the world who came to sacrifice himself for our sake.Let me close with this reminder that what we are truly celebrating today is Jesus is our salvation:God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God (2 Corinthians 5:21).Merry Christmas!
Are you feeling anxious about something today? Are you very disturbed over a situation in your life? Does it seem impossible to find any rest and peace right now? Recently, a passage in Isaiah 48 gave me some insight into the reasons behind the anxiety and unrest I was experiencing.This is what the Lord says—your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: I am the Lord your God who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go. If only you had paid attention to my commands, your peace would have been like a river, your righteousness like the waves of the sea (Isaiah 48:17-18).How incisively the Word of God cuts through and exposes the real issues. I was reminded anxiety and unrest are often a result of my failure to pay attention to what I know about God. Rarely do I need some new truth or principle to help me out; I just need to practice what I know already.God's direction and commands are there for all of us to see and understand. We know the basics, don't we? And yet our feet tend to stray. We leave off something here and something else there, which we know we should be doing, and we fail to completely follow the commands of God, which are clearly understood.I find I rarely make a deliberate decision to wander from God's principles. It's simply a failure to pay attention to what I know already. My focus becomes fractured. I move slightly off-center, simply because I haven't paid attention like I should.And when that happens, the results are anxiety, frustration, and loss of peace and rest. When you start to dig underneath those outward effects, you often discover the cause is a failure to pay attention to God's commands. It may be something that seems very small, but if we walk away from doing it God's way, we can expect to lose the peace and rest we so need.The Lord told his people, "If only you had paid attention to my commands, your peace would have been like a river.” If you're missing peace in your life today, check out the obedience department and see if there's some area where you're not paying attention to God. Once you get that straightened out, that wonderful, marvelous, indescribable peace will return, like a river, flooding your heart and calming your nerves.
Do you have days when you feel like the score is: The World - 100; God - 0? Does it sometimes appear you're on the losing team?Maybe you go to a job where God is irrelevant to the people around you—where his name is used only in profanity, and they seemingly give no thought to God as Creator, Ruler, or Sovereign. You're in a daily environment where a commitment to Jesus Christ is looked upon as foolish, naive, or laughable. When you apply biblical principles in your everyday world, people take advantage of you, ignore you, or discount your ideas altogether.Let's face it, that's the way it seems at times. You're walking the straight and narrow, but what for? Where does it get you? The other team does what they please and gets ahead for it. Do you sometimes feel like joining the other team? Are you tired of being in the minority all the time—seemingly losing all these skirmishes you face every day?Well, I want to encourage you today to remember one thing: The final chapter has been written, and we know what the end will be. I think of the young boy who was reading a thrilling mystery book when his mom insisted he put the book down and do his chores. "But, mom, I'm in the fourth chapter and the villain has the hero in his clutches. Looks like he's going to die! I can't quit now.” But mom insisted so hurriedly he flips to the last chapter and reads the final page. He then bounds into the kitchen where his mother is waiting and says, "Wow, that old villain is doing real good in Chapter 4, but just wait till he gets to the end of the book. Is he in for a surprise.” It looked liked disaster in Chapter 4, but when you know the end, then Chapter 4 takes on a whole new perspective.Maybe you're in Chapter 4 today, and you need to flip to the end and read the last page. It's already been written, and I can tell you the outcome: Jesus wins and those of us who are his followers will win and reign with him. Read Revelations 20, 21, and 22 today.Remember, God has not lost control of this world. He is bringing it to its end in his time and for his purposes. He is Sovereign and he still reigns in heaven.As you head into a world where it may appear the score is unevenly in favor of the world's crowd, remember the last chapter, and don't let Chapter 4 get you down. If you know Christ as your Savior, you're on the winning team!
It took me ten years before I came to that place of letting go of my dreams and relinquishing them for God’s plan for my life. Ten years of doing my own thing, running my show, determined to get what I wanted. In those ten years had you asked me if I wanted to live according to God’s plan for my life, I probably would have said yes, but it would have just been a cover-up because in truth, I wanted God to bless my plans. I wanted my dream to come true—hopefully with God along for the ride—but one way or another, it was my way or the highway. Is that where you are?Take it from me: Don’t waste ten years or ten minutes trying to make your dreams come true. Trust a trustworthy God who has better plans than yours and who loves you unconditionally. During the eighteen months of grieving the loss of my dream, there were days when I just about didn’t make it. I came so close so many times to taking back the controls of my life into my own hands. But thankfully, I was spending time in God’s Word, I was getting to know God, and I knew I just couldn’t turn back.What finally became so clear to me was that my basic problem was my fear of trusting God. And then I realized not only how stupid that was, but how sinful it was for me to trust myself and not the God who made me.Jeremiah 29:11: “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”There is no reason for you to fear God’s plans for your life. Satan has told you lies about how miserable your life will be if God it is in control, and he’s a good liar. The God of heaven and earth is a trustworthy God. You can trust him.Moses is a case study of a man who came to understand God had a plan for his life, and it was a good one. You know how his life was saved as a baby by a very creative mother and sister. As Moses grew to manhood, he was educated as an Egyptian with all the privileges that came from being raised as Pharaoh’s daughter. No doubt his future looked bright and promising because he was the adopted son of Pharaoh’s daughter.But he never forgot he was a Jew, one of God’s chosen people, so he wanted to help his people. Pharaoh kept the Jewish people in bitter servitude, and they were sorely mistreated. One day when Moses saw an Egyptian beating one of his Hebrew brothers, he killed the Egyptian and hid his body in the sand. He thought he was doing the right thing to defend his countryman, but the next day, when he saw two Hebrews fighting each other and tried to stop them, they turned on him and said, “Who made you ruler and judge over us? Are you thinking of killing me as you killed the Egyptian?” (Exodus 2:14).Well, this just blew Moses away. He thought his murderous act was a secret, but now he realized it wasn’t, and when Pharaoh heard about it, he tried to kill Moses. So, Moses fled from Pharaoh and lived in Midian, where he became a lowly, humble shepherd. For 40 years, Moses lived in exile in Midian. His life and dreams were changed overnight. And it was because of something he did; something he should not have done. Regardless of the reason, murdering another man was wrong. So, through his own actions his dream died. Now Moses figured his Plan A was ruined; he had to settle for Plan B.Is this your story, too? Have you brought grief on yourself because of a foolish decision or choice? Has your disobedience—your sin—caused you to live with regret, think that you’ve lost your dream, and settle for the best you can do? You’re now relegated to Plan B—or C or D?Moses figured he had blown it so badly, that God would never use him again. But he was wrong. After 40 years, as Moses was tending the flock of Jethro his father-in-law at Horeb, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in flames of fire from within a bush. God clearly spoke to him and gave him a new assignment—to go and set his people free from Pharaoh.Moses is now a humbled man,
Have you been so busy getting ready for Christmas that you've lost sight of its real meaning? That is easy to do. I've been trying to encourage all of us to see the Christmas season as an opportunity for evangelistic outreach.Louise and Fran decided to have a Christmas party for their friends at work, and at the end of the party they gave a Christmas play, with the help of Fran's kids. Then Louise briefly shared her testimony and closed their party in prayer.As their guests were leaving, everyone commented on how nice the party was. Andy, Fran's good friend from the Art Department, said to her, "This was the nicest Christmas party I've ever been to. Really makes you stop and remember what Christmas is all about."Fran noticed Janice and George kept hanging around, as though they were reluctant to leave. Finally, everyone had gone except them, and Fran said, "You guys want to have another cup of coffee before you hit the road?" She expected them to refuse, but to her surprise, they stayed. Fran sent her kids off to bed, and the four of them sat around the table.Janice said, "Fran, thanks for inviting us. I'm really glad we've gotten to know each other. Your kids are so cute.""Thanks, Janice," Fran says."I couldn't believe how much they had memorized," Janice comments."Well, they've been quoting the Christmas story at church since they could talk, practically, so they know it pretty good," Fran says."I wish our kids…" Janice starts, then catches herself."What she started to say," George adds quietly, "is that she wishes our kids went to church like yours. But, well, I just don't believe in God so why should they waste their time? However, after watching your kids tonight, I can see how much they enjoyed it. Maybe I should let 'em go at Christmas time.""Oh, honey, that would be wonderful," Janice lights up.For over an hour Janice and George sit at the table with Fran and Louise talking about why George decided to be an atheist and why Fran and Louise believe in God and Jesus. It was an absolutely amazing conversation."Wow, hon, it's after midnight," George finally says. "We need to go.""I'm so glad you stayed," Fran says. "Listen, George, why don't you come with the family to our Christmas concert tomorrow night. We'd love to have you.""I don't know," he says, "I'll think about it. This is kinda heavy for me.""Well, you think about it," Louise says, "and we'll talk to you tomorrow."As they leave, Louise and Fran take time to pray God will continue to work on George's heart. "Underneath that tough exterior is a man who knows he doesn't have all the answers, Fran," Louise says, and they agree that this party was a divine appointment for George.Look for your divine opportunities this Christmas.
Have you been to any Christmas parties yet this season? Fran and Louise have decided to have a different party this year. Instead of inviting their Christian friends from church, they've invited all their friends at the office, most of whom are not Christians.Fran gets up early this Saturday morning, knowing she has lots to do to get ready for the party tonight. Louise comes over later in the morning to help. She's been cooking all week to have everything ready, and the kids are excited to help, too.About mid-afternoon, Fran says, "Hey, you guys, we need to practice our Christmas play." They decided after everyone eats and they have some fun games, the four of them will re-enact the Christmas story. Fran brought costumes home from church, Louise made a manger, Alice put her best doll in the manger, and Drew made cardboard cut outs of a sheep and a cow.The evening goes really nice. Fran is so pleased that twenty-three people came, including Janice and her husband, George. She whispered to Fran, "I'd never get him to church, but he's always ready for a party!" George says he is an atheist.Everybody seems to be having a great time; there's lots of laughter and clean fun. Finally, it's time for the play. Louise says, "Well, since this is a Christmas party, we wanted to have something special—a Christmas play, with the help of Drew and Alice."At first people seem a little uncomfortable, but as Louise and Fran get the manger in place, everyone finds a seat so they can watch. Alice is an angel, and she quotes from Luke 2: Behold I bring you glad tidings of great joy. She looks like an angel, and everyone applauds when she finishes. Children can break down barriers between people very easily, Fran notes to herself.They go through their prepared play, telling the story of Christmas. Drew is a shepherd, and Fran and Louise play Mary and Joseph. Then the kids sing a Christmas song they learned at church, which tells why Jesus came to a manger.As it ends, there's not a sound in the house, and not a few are dabbing tears away. Louise says, "Well, we just wanted to share with you what Christmas means to us. You know, lots of people are celebrating Christmas but they don't really know Jesus. I'm so glad that when I was sixteen years old, I found out who Jesus is, and he became my Savior."And without embarrassment, Louise shares her testimony and then leads in a prayer at the end of their party. Let's take back Christmas and find better ways to celebrate it.
Since it's very close to Christmas, I'm suggesting we ask God for creative ideas on how we can use the celebration of Christmas to open some new doors of witnessing. Fran and Louise have caught that vision this year, and they're planning a party at Fran's house for their office friends.In addition, Fran took a beautiful family crèche to her office in hopes it would generate some conversations and questions that would offer opportunities to share the good news about Jesus, and it has done so already.Janice is a co-worker Fran hasn't really gotten to know, but she showed an interest in Fran's manger scene. That has led to a luncheon together. As they sit down to eat, Fran asks, "How does your family usually celebrate Christmas?""Oh, we just exchange gifts on Christmas Eve like everyone else, I guess," Janice says. "My kids have outgrown Santa Claus, but when they were little, that was a lot of fun.""Do you have any special programs at your church?" Fran continues to probe."Well, actually we don't go to church, sorry to say," Janice hangs her head a bit. "You see, my husband is an…atheist…or so he says. So, we haven't been to church since we've been married. I miss it; I used to go when I was kid, at least at Christmas and Easter.""Oh, that's too bad," Fran says. "I'd miss church, too, especially during Christmas. We have such beautiful programs at our church. In fact, if you'd like to, I'd be glad to pick up you and the kids for one of our concerts."Janice looks at Fran. "Well, I don't think my husband would like that," she says, then she hesitates. "You know, I don't care whether he likes it or not. I would just love to go to church this Christmas.""Great," Fran says, and they arrange the date and time. Then Fran says, "It's interesting that your husband is an atheist, but you are not, I gather.""No, I believe in God, and I want my kids to believe in God, too," Janice says."Do you think they will, since their daddy doesn't?" Fran asks."I doubt it," Janice says sadly. "Philip, my twelve-year-old, already makes jokes about Christians and church, just like his dad does. I don't like it, but what can I say?""Yeah, I see what you mean," Fran says. "Did you know your husband was an atheist when you married him?""Yeah, but I didn't think it would make any difference," Janice says. "But the longer I'm married, the more it bothers me. I want to be a religious person.""You know, Janice, the reason you feel that way is because we all have a great God-shaped void inside us and he's the only one who can fill it up," and with that Fran has a marvelous opportunity to tell Janice how Jesus wants to make her more than a religious person but a new person in Christ.Reach out to someone new this Christmas, someone you don't know so well at your job or in your neighborhood. You might be as surprised as Fran is to discover how easy it is to share the gospel, especially during the Christmas season.
Do you sometimes feel sick at this time of year over the godless celebrations of Christmas? I want to challenge all of us to take Christmas back from its secularized version and use this time of year as an opportunity to reach out to people with the whole story of Christmas—that Jesus came as a baby for one reason, to die on a cross so that we could go to heaven.Fran and Louise have decided they want to do something different this year. Instead of having her usual Christmas party for her friends at church, she and Louise decided to have a party for people at work. Since it will be in her home, Fran can control the menu and the tone of the party, and she and Louise have thought of a creative way to get the gospel in.This Sunday evening, after Louise left, she and the kids decide to get out some of the decorations for Christmas. "Oh, here's my beautiful Christmas crèche that Aunt Regina gave me," Fran says as she carefully unwraps each beautiful piece."Are you gonna put it on the mantel again this year, Mom?" Drew asks."Yeah, I think that's the best place…” Fran starts, and then a thought overtakes her. "Hey, kids, would you mind if I took this to the office this year? I could display it on my credenza at work, and maybe it would start some conversations.""But Mommy, we always have it on our mantel," Alice objects. "It's so pretty. It might get broke at work.""I know, Alice," Fran says, "and I've been so careful with it all these years. It's a beautiful treasure.""You said it cost a lot of money," Alice adds."Hmm, I'm sure it did. But you know, Alice, if it would help someone hear about Jesus, don't you think it would be worth it to put it in my office this year?" Fran asks."Well," Alice says, "since you put it that way."The next day Fran takes her beautiful family treasure to the office and carefully displays it on her credenza. One of her peers, Janice, comes in just as she is putting it out."What's that, Fran?" she asks. "Oh, a manger set. That's nice." She begins to look at it closely. "Actually, it's exquisite. Where did you get it?"Fran explains the family history of her crèche and then says, "I just wanted to find a way to remind myself and everybody else about the real reason we have Christmas. I think it sometimes gets lost in all the craziness, don't you?""The real reason?" Janice says. "What do you mean?"What a great question. Just what Fran had hoped for. "You know, it would take longer than we've got right now to answer that question. How about lunch today?""Lunch with me?" Janice seems surprised. She and Fran just never have had an opportunity to get to know each other very well. But they agree to meet for lunch, where Fran has an open door to talk about the real meaning of Christmas.What could you do in your office or workplace this Christmas that might start a meaningful conversation? Think about it.
As we all find ourselves swallowed up by our preparations for Christmas, it's good to remember Christmas holds no true meaning unless we know that Jesus came for one purpose: to die on a cross and be raised again so we could be redeemed from our sins.I believe we have a great opportunity during Christmas to reach out to people with the good news of the gospel because typically people are more open to talking about religious matters at this time of year. This week I have another Fran and Jesus story as Fran begins to see what she can do during this Christmas season to tell the story of Jesus—the whole story—to her friends at work.She and her friend Louise are driving home from church this Sunday afternoon and Louise says, "Pastor's sermon was very challenging, don't you think, Fran?""You mean about finding ways to reach people during Christmas?" she responds. "Yeah, it made me think about what I could do at the office.""It just makes me sick the way Christmas is treated around there," Louise comments. "I mean, nobody even mentions Jesus. It's just an excuse for parties and drinking and…""Yeah, do you remember last year's Christmas party?" Fran continues. "I left after dinner; it was too crazy for me.""I stayed awhile longer, but I wished I had left when you did,” Louise says. "Well, what do you think we could do to try to change that and make people see what Christmas is all about?""We could invite people to our church concert," Fran says. "I did that last year, and Andy brought his family. They really enjoyed the music.""That's a good idea," Louise says. "But there must be something we can do right in the office…""Oh, you have to be careful," Fran says, "or we'll be accused of being politically incorrect!""Hey, Mom," Drew pipes in from the back seat, "why don't you and Louise have your own party at our house.""Well, hon, I don't think… " Fran starts and then stops. "Drew, you know, that's not a bad idea.""Actually, it's a great idea, Drew," Louise says. "Why don't we, Fran? Then we can control what goes on, have some great fun, and somehow get the gospel in.""Let's do it, Louise," Fran says with enthusiasm."And we'll help, Mom," Alice volunteers."You bet," they agree. All afternoon they plan the party, write the invitations, and then they pray God will use it to help them tell the true story of Christmas. What could you do to reach out during this Christmas season? It's a great opportunity. Don't let it get lost in the frenzy of celebrations.
For a long time, I used to say I was living in God’s Plan B for my life, and that even though it was Plan B, it was still a good plan. I really thought that because I messed up my life so much, God had to come up with a different plan for my life and let me settle for something less than he had planned for me. It’s as though I thought God looked down at my mess and said, “Goodness, what am I going to do now? How did Mary get herself in such a mess? Guess I’ll have to come up with Plan B.”That’s because I really messed up. Whatever “baggage” I have brought into my life has been bags I’ve packed myself. I have no one to blame but me. I made poor choices, wrong decisions, and chose sinful paths for about ten years of my young adult life.Briefly, when my daughter was eight years old, I found myself going through a divorce. This was the last thing I ever thought would happen to me; it was the last thing my family or friends ever imagined would happen. After all, I was raised in a good Christian home, graduated from a Christian college, and was the music director at my church! But there it was—I was divorced and I had to earn a living and my entire life dramatically changed.I was so insecure about my value as a woman and so desperately needed to feel loved and valued, that as the old song goes, I looked for love in all the wrong places. And for ten long years, I covered up, pretended I was totally in control, climbed the corporate career ladder, earned more money, got promotions, bought more stuff—and all the time the little girl in me was crying for someone to say, “You are precious to me.” Sure, I had friends and a wonderful family. I should have been content with the love they had for me, but it wasn’t enough. I wanted to know that I was valued as a woman!It took a move to Chicago, a dreadful career decision, and many broken relationships, but finally in God’s grace, like the prodigal son, I came to my senses and returned to my Father, asked for forgiveness, received it completely, and started on a new path. That was about 43 years ago. And that new path has been full of his blessing and the great privilege is mine to have this ministry. Let me assure you I do not have it all together, but I can tell you I know I am loved and precious to God, and that has satisfied my heart like nothing else ever could or did.So that’s why I used to say I messed up Plan A, but God gave me Plan B. I t was good, but it wasn’t Plan A. It was second best—Plan B. Then not long ago I began to take a second look at my theology and realized if I truly believed in the sovereignty of God, then I had to believe God doesn’t have any Plan Bs. It’s all Plan A with God. You see, believing God is sovereign means you believe he always, at all times, has every situation in control! Nothing ever takes him by surprise. Before the world ever began, my days were written in his book.Psalm 139:16: All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.And then I was reading Jeremiah 1:5, where the Lord said to Jeremiah:“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart. . .”The Bible makes it clear that God is in ultimate control of us as individuals and of the world as well, from the international scene to a sparrow that falls.Isaiah 46:10: I make known the end from the beginning, from ancient times, what is still to come. I say: My purpose will stand, and I will do all that I please.Daniel 4:35: All the peoples of the earth are regarded as nothing. He does as he pleases with the powers of heaven and the peoples of the earth. No one can hold back his hand or say to him: “What have you done?” Psalm 115:3: Our God is in heaven; he does whatever pleases him.Now, if you want me to explain God’s sovereignty to you, I must admit I simply cannot—and furthermore, I’m not sure anyone can totally understand or explain it. I have questions I can’t answer.
My purpose this week is to inspire and encourage you to become more intentional about knowing God better by becoming more aware of his many wonderful attributes. And I’m offering a handout that might help you form that new habit. You’ll find it on our website, and it’s called An Attribute a Day Keeps the Devil Away.The last attribute we will consider is the omnipotence of God. Omni equals all; potence equals power. God is all powerful. And his power is not acquired, and it does not depend on anything outside of himself. It is self-existent, self-sustained. If you or I have some power in some area, it is because someone or something has given us power. Our politicians have power because we vote them in office. But our God is omnipotent, and his power is within himself.God created the world without any tools or materials—ex nihilo. He created the world without the use of any pre-existent matter. As you look at the universe around you, the stars, the clouds, the mountains, the seas, think of this: God spoke them into existence. He started with nothing and created them. He is all powerful.If you have ever had power over sin, it is because God gave you the power. If you have ever had power to persuade others to accept Christ, the power is from God. If you have ever had an answer to a prayer, it is not the power of your prayer but the power of God that chose to answer your prayer, which was according to his will. Whenever God has chosen to use mankind to accomplish something, it is not because he needs their power, but because he grants power to them.This discussion of God’s attributes doesn’t scratch the surface, but I hope it inspires you to get serious about knowing God better as you focus on his marvelous attributes. I’ve prepared a handout to help you. It’s called An Attribute a Day Keeps the Devil Away, and you’ll find it here. Use it to help you develop a good habit of meditating each day on who God is and how much he loves you.
This week my focus is getting to know God better by becoming more aware of and thankful for his wonderful attributes. In fact, I’ve made a handout you will find on our website to help you develop a habit of focusing regularly on God’s attributes. I call it An Attribute a Day Keeps the Devil Away.C. H. Spurgeon was called the Prince of Preachers in the 19th Century. He wrote: “There is something exceedingly improving to the mind in a contemplation of the Divinity. It is a subject so vast, that all our thoughts are lost in its immensity; so deep, that our pride is drowned in its infinity. . . No subject of contemplation will tend more to humble the mind, than thoughts of God. . . But while the subject humbles the mind, it also expands it. . . I know nothing which can so comfort the soul; so calm the swelling billows of grief and sorrow; so speak peace to the winds of trial, as a devout musing upon the subject of the Godhead.”[1]There are so many benefits we gain when we know God better and better. For example, how would you define God’s immutability? Immutability is not a word we use frequently—right? But we should know what it means—and how wonderful it is—that our God is immutable, because that means he never changes. He is perpetually the same in every respect.In the beginning you laid the foundations of the earth, and the heavens are the work of your hands. They will perish, but you remain; they will all wear out like a garment…But you remain the same, and your years will never end (Psalm 102:25 – 27).Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever (Hebrews 13:8).God has neither evolved, grown, nor improved. He is unaffected by anything outside himself. He is not influenced by the passing of time. He does not age. His power can never diminish; his glory can never fade.Aren’t you glad when you wake up each morning, you don’t have to wonder if God still loves you? You may be rightfully concerned about the love or loyalty of some people in your life, but never, never do you need to wonder if God still loves you or if he’ll leave you. That’s because he is immutable; he never changes because he has no need for change. Meditate on that today; it will change your day.---[1] Spurgeon, C. H. (1855, January 7). The Immutability of God. The Spurgeon Center. https://www.spurgeon.org/resource-library/sermons/the-immutability-of-god/#flipbook/
I’m reminding you of a few of God’s marvelous attributes because the more you know about God, the more you will live in his freedom, in his love, and for his glory. Your relationship with God—which no doubt spills over to all other relationships in your life—depends in large part on how well you know God and how consistently you try to know him better.God does not want to be taken for granted. John Piper writes: “We get anesthetized to the unspeakable and appalling insult rendered to God, day in and day out by his being ignored. It starts to feel normal—the way it’s normal not to think about air or a solid earth under our feet.”One way to make sure you’re not taking God for granted, not ignoring him, is to consistently dwell on his many wonderful attributes. For example, have you thought lately about the truth that God is supreme? That means he outranks everyone and everything. He fears nothing or no one.You remember after the resurrection, before returning to Heaven, Jesus said that all authority had been given to him in Heaven and on earth. All authority! Jesus is supreme.What does the supremacy of God mean to you—in your life? Someone put it this way: “Our lives are neither the product of blind fate nor the result of capricious chance, but every detail of them was ordained from all eternity and is now ordered by the living and reigning God. Not a hair of our heads can be touched without his permission.” That’s because our God and our Savior is supreme.Here's the thing—if you and I made it a habit to dwell on at least one attribute of God each day, to thank God for it, to remind ourselves all through each day of one particular thing about God, there is no doubt our days would be better. The very thought of Jesus changes our attitudes; makes us thankful and humble and joyful. One attribute a day—that’s not hard to do, is it? Let’s begin today by praising God all through the day and the night that he is supreme, and no one can pluck you out of his hand.
We’re taking a very limited look at some of the attributes of God because the more we know God, the more we are able to please him, to avoid temptation, and to bring glory to his name. Yesterday we began looking at the truth that God is infinite.Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast (Psalm 139:7-10).You cannot go where God is not. God is infinite in all he is. Whatever attribute of God you can name, it is limitless. One of my favorite songs says:His love has no limits, his grace has no measure,His power has no boundaries known unto men.For out of his infinite riches in JesusHe giveth and giveth and giveth again.Out of his fullness we have all received grace in place of grace already given (John 1:16).What does God’s infinity mean to you? It means he never runs out of anything. It means his understanding of you and whatever you’re going through is total. He hasn’t missed a thing. He knows far more than you do because he knows everything, and his ability to handle your situations is limitless. There is nothing too hard for God. He is infinite!Ask yourself if your concept of God is too small. How would a larger view of God affect the way you live? I have found that reciting God’s attributes regularly, thanking God for who he is, changes me. It gives me confidence, it gives me hope, it gives me peace. You might want to journal the attributes of God—put them in writing. Then make it a part of your prayer each day to thank God for who he is—for the truth that he is infinite in every way.
I have a question for you: What is the most important thing about you? Here’s what A.W. Tozer, the great theologian of the last century, wrote: “What comes into our minds when we think about God is the most important thing about us.” When you think about God, what do you think about God?Jesus put it this way:Now this is eternal life; that they may know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent (John 17:3).Knowing God makes a difference now and in eternity.Therefore, getting to know God should be the most important pursuit of our lives as Christ-followers. Is that true for you? We get to know God through studying his Word and paying attention to what he tells us about himself. Let’s consider just a few of God’s attributes in order to get to know him better.God’s InfinitudeInfinite means immeasurable, exceedingly great, endless, inexhaustible. The Bible says:Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise; his greatness no one can fathom (Psalm 145:3).Great is our Lord and mighty in power; his understanding has no limit (Psalm 147:5).Have you ever meditated on the truth that God is infinite? Honestly, our minds are just too small to take it all in. As David said, no one can fathom the greatness of God. Even though we can’t fully comprehend infinitude, that’s who our God is, and we need to allow our minds to blow some fuses and just meditate often on our infinite God.That means his knowledge of you is infinite. It means nothing you will experience, no one you may have to deal with, no difficulty you will face today is too big for the God you serve. He’s got you! He knows the worst about you and loves you infinitely!Go to your world with full assurance that the God you serve has promised to never leave you or forsake you, and he’ll get you through whatever has you worried or frightened or frustrated. Your God is infinite!
I must confess that I am indeed a control freak. My nature and personality tend to give me that control mentality. I tend to be impatient and hate having to wait. I want to manipulate and call the shots and direct the action, instead of letting God be God. So today I'm preaching to myself and you're welcome to listen in. I’ve titled this devotional: "Don't fight; just show up!"Do you recall the story found in 2 Chronicles 20, where Jehoshaphat was facing war with a bunch of enemies who could undoubtedly wipe him off the map? He was a godly king of Judah, and when he realized this vast army was marching his way, he was alarmed, frightened, worried! Who wouldn't be? But as soon as he saw his predicament, he resolved to inquire of the Lord and he proclaimed a fast for all Judah (2 Chronicles 20:3).Notice how he responded to a crisis: He resolved to inquire of the Lord. What is the first thing you do when facing an overwhelming enemy of some sort? It could be a relationship enemy or a financial enemy or a jobless enemy or a health enemy—they come in all types and sizes. Our first emotional reaction is alarm; that's to be expected. But what does that alarm cause you to do?Often the first thing I do is to plan my fight. Whatever the problem is, I start figuring how I can win this battle. I can do this or that; I can talk to this person or that one; I can pull this string or another one. Surely there is something I can do to fix this situation—and fix it fast! So, I start drawing up my battle plan.Jehoshaphat knew better. He remembered to first "inquire of the Lord.” What is your mission impossible today, your impossible person, your mountain too high to climb? Have you inquired of the Lord yet for his guidance? Or are you struggling and working and fretting to come up with your own battle plan so you can solve that problem?Sometimes you need to just stop right where you are and inquire of the Lord. That means tell him that you trust him, you believe he is smarter than you are, and you admit your ideas usually make matters worse rather than solve anything. So, instead of fighting your battle today, you're going to inquire of the Lord as to what to do. That's the first important step.Now please note the end of Jehoshaphat’s prayer as he inquired of the Lord: For we have no power to face this vast army that is attacking us. We do not know what to do, but our eyes are upon you. (2 Chronicles 20:12).Have you ever prayed that prayer? Many times, God doesn't move on our behalf until we come to this place where we quit maneuvering and manipulating and planning and working and admit we don't have the foggiest notion what to do and nothing we've tried so far has worked. That may be exactly what you need to do today, right now. Stop fighting and admit your own defeat.Often, we run the gamut of our ideas before we turn it over to the Lord. For example, with a relationship problem, you may typically try all kinds of battle plans to fight that enemy. Many times, you’ve probably tried so hard to please another person to solve the problem, and you jump through all their hoops, only to discover the situation is no better.Or you may decide to confront, get very assertive, and tell them a thing or two, and that backfires on you. Of course, there's always nagging to fall back on if you're trying to resolve a problem with another person. Sometimes you may even get vindictive and try to get your pound of flesh. You see, your battle plans—and mine—are pretty pitiful, and they'll never defeat the enemy.Are you ready to admit defeat today with that person who is the bane of your existence right now? Are you ready to acknowledge you have no answers, no power, no plan, and you simply do not know what to do? If so, you are poised for God to intervene and do something on your behalf.Now, does that mean you just sit down and quit? No, as we see in this story of Jehoshaphat, he had to show up at the battlefield,
Jesus said, “I am the Way, the Truth and the Life” (John 14:6). I wonder if you’ve ever contemplated just how totally sufficient Jesus is because he is your way, your truth, and your life? I’ve been pointing out some of the names of Jesus we find in Scripture, and I am encouraging you to claim those names for your own needs. I’ve talked about how Jesus is your Advocate, Jesus is God with you, Jesus is your Wonderful Counselor and your Prince of Peace—just some of the many titles and authority given to Jesus.But when Jesus said, “I am the way, the truth and the life,” he was saying everything you will ever need is found in him. He is your way, your path to God and eternal life. Jesus was again telling his disciples to “follow me.” Peter later wrote:Salvation is found in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given to men by which we must be saved (Acts 4:12).He declared he is the Truth—therefore, he is trustworthy. He can never lie to you or deceive you, and you can totally trust everything he has said and every direction he has given you. He is the Truth that can set you free from your sin, free from fear, free from bondage.And Jesus is your life. Jesus was telling his disciples about his impending death, and then he claimed to be the source of all life. He said he would lay down his life for the sheep, and then he would rise from the dead to life again. He gave the promise because I live, you also will live (John 14:19).Wherever you are today—in whatever predicament you find yourself, your need is met in Jesus. Claim his names: he is the way, the truth, and the life. Run to Jesus; call on Jesus; trust Jesus. Everything is always all about Jesus. So, claim his name, his authority, as your own. That is your privilege if you are truly born from above.
Peace is a commodity in short supply these days—wouldn’t you agree? While we hear a lot of talk about peace, we recognize there is precious little of it in our world and in our lives. How about you? Are you a little short on peace right now? Have you been spending too much time in worry mode? Has fear seized your mind and heart, keeping you awake at night?I’m examining the names of Jesus—the titles he has been given by the Father. Names that show his power and his authority. And one of those names is Prince of Peace, which we read in Isaiah 9. A prince is someone who is a leader and has influence and authority. Therefore, the Prince of Peace can bestow peace on a person or situation.If you have become a believer in Jesus Christ, then you have access to the Prince of Peace. That means there is no need for you to be held captive by worry or fear, because you can claim the name of Jesus—the Prince of Peace—and he will give you peace. Ephesians 2:14 says Jesus himself is our peace.Jesus said the peace he gives us is not just temporary peace like you might find in the world. Jesus said it’s peace only he can give, and Paul wrote to the church in Philippi,The peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:7).Why are you living in worry and fear? Do you see how useless and unnecessary it is for you as a child of God because you can claim the name of Jesus, your Prince of Peace. And you do that by faith. You believe Jesus is your peace, and you claim that peace as your own. You don’t have to feel it; you just have to believe Jesus is the Prince of Peace, and he has peace for you.I would suggest when you find yourself engulfed by worry or fear, you simply start repeating what the Bible says is true, that Jesus, the Prince of Peace, is your peace. Resist the enemy who wants to keep you mired in doubt and worry. Run him off—out of your mind—by repeating the truth that Jesus is your peace, and then repeat that as often as you need to throughout the day. This is how you claim the name of Jesus.
I’m examining the names—or titles—of Jesus that we can claim for whatever need we’re facing. For example, did you know Jesus is your heavenly Advocate?My dear children, I write this to you so that you will not sin. But if anybody does sin, we have an advocate with the Father—Jesus Christ, the Righteous One (1 John 2:1).An advocate is someone who supports you, who pleads on your behalf. What an incredible truth as believers in Jesus Christ. We can claim this name of Jesus, that he is our Advocate with the Father.Scripture tells us Jesus is seated at the right hand of God’s throne, and he is there to intercede for you, to plead on your behalf. That means you have the privilege of going right to God’s throne in prayer, and Jesus is there to plead your case.The Bible tells us Satan is accusing us night and day before the Father (Revelations 12:10). Do you get the picture here? Satan is accusing you, but Jesus is at the right hand of God advocating for you. It’s like a scene from a courtroom, but the verdict is already determined. Satan can accuse all he wants, but he can’t win, because we have an Advocate, Jesus Christ.Could it be you are now facing some failure on your part—something you did or said or failed to do that you know was wrong, was sinful? You know you have disobeyed God in some way and your conscience is really bothering you.But what do you do? You go to your Advocate, to Jesus in prayer, and you claim his name—his authority—as your Advocate to plead your case to the Father for forgiveness. Just believe what the Bible says. You have an advocate with the Father when you sin, and Jesus, your Advocate, has all authority given to him in heaven and in earth. Do you think he will win your case for you? You can be totally confident if you confess your sin, your Heavenly Father will forgive you because you come to him through Jesus, your Advocate.Claim the name today of Jesus, your Advocate, and know the freedom that comes through forgiveness and cleansing.
What are you facing today that has you puzzled? Our lives are full of decision points, forks in the road where the choice we make will have some significant impact in our lives. How do you make good decisions? How can you be sure you’re choosing the right path?For those of us who have placed our trust in Jesus as our Savior, we have access to him and the power of his name. And one of the most wonderful names given to Jesus is found in Isaiah 9:6.He will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:6).In one verse we have four of the incredible names given to our Lord, and at the top of the list is Wonderful Counselor.What is the role of a counselor? It is to give guidance and trustworthy advice, right? As you’re facing some important decisions today, have you gone to Jesus for counsel, or are you just trying to figure it out on your own? His name is Wonderful Counselor—the best Counselor. Have you claimed the name of Jesus for the guidance you need?I remember some years ago when I was facing a dilemma in my life, one that looked potentially dire and where the wrong decision could be catastrophic. I knew I needed good advice, so what did I do? I called my best friend, who just wasn’t available to me at that moment. I kept trying to reach her but to no avail, and I actually became irritated at her for not being there when I needed her. And as I paced the floor in frustration, trying to reach my friend, so clearly the Lord reminded me Jesus is my Wonderful Counselor. He is the one I needed to turn to first and fast, because his guidance is perfect.I stopped and claimed the name of Jesus—Wonderful Counselor—and took the whole situation to him in prayer. He calmed my spirit and assured me he would guide my steps through this situation, and I could trust him. After all, he’s not like any other counselor—those who can be mistaken; instead, he is my wonderful, perfect Counselor.I want to encourage you today, as you’re facing some decision point, some difficult situation, to first seek counsel from Jesus. Claim his name of Wonderful Counselor and call on him for the guidance you need. He’s always available. As a Christian you have instant access to his presence—no waiting around—and he is indeed a Wonderful Counselor in whom you can totally trust. Claim that name for yourself today.
The Bible makes it clear the name of Jesus is to be honored and respected above all other names.Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father (Philippians 2:9-12).The President of the United States is called President, Leader of the Free World, Commander in Chief of the Armed Forces, Head of a Political Party—and other titles that are given to him because he was elected President. Those titles represent his authority in various areas. Similarly, but in a much more important way, Jesus has been given names by God the Father that represent his authority, and as Christ-followers, we have access to the power of his name.I want to focus on five of the many names in the Bible that describe Jesus, and I want to encourage you as a Christ-follower to claim his name for whatever need you are facing—to “claim the name.”In Isaiah 7:14 we read the Messiah will be called Immanuel, which means “God with us.” This is a name of Jesus you can claim.This means in the midst of whatever you’re facing, you stop and claim the truth that Jesus is “God with you.” You are not alone. He will never leave you or forsake you. It means in the middle of your pity party, when you are feeling sorry for yourself because you’re facing something all alone and you feel as though nobody cares, you can claim the name of Immanuel and know God is with you.For those times when you feel forsaken or abandoned, when all your friends seem to have vanished, when the person closest to you doesn’t seem to understand what you’re going through, learn to tap into the power in the name of Jesus Immanuel—God with you. It’s true, but you must claim it for yourself—claim the name of Jesus Immanuel today and be encouraged because God is with you.
Presented by Lauren StibgenThink about the last time you really wanted someone to help you or a friend to commiserate with. You just needed someone to see your need, to reach out, and to show you well, compassion. If you are anything like me, I deploy what many would call a resilience strategy for my life so these moments when I am truly low or even physically hurting and I want someone to come alongside me are few and far between. I have met so many women like this—especially in the executive ranks. Perhaps as my friend Catherine Gates would say in her book, The Confidence Cornerstone, we have bought into a belief system in our culture that causes us as women to go it alone. Afraid of seeming vulnerable, sometimes, even when we really need it, we don’t seek or receive compassion from others well at all.[1]I know one woman in the Bible who didn’t want compassion. In fact, in her sorrow, she wanted to go it alone. Naomi. Most of you know this story. Naomi and her husband, Elimelech flee to Moab with their two sons. The sons take foreign wives. Eventually, the husband and both sons die leaving Naomi, Ruth, and Orpah (not Oprah) widowed and alone. Naomi decides it is time to head back to Judah. In Ruth 1:8 Naomi tells her daughters-in-law, Go back, each of you, to your mother’s home. May the Lord show you kindness, as you have shown kindness to your dead husbands and to me.Maybe she was showing compassion and gratitude for these women. We know Orpah returns to Moab and Ruth insists on going along with the widowed Naomi. We then see Naomi is bitter; she isn’t receiving the compassion Ruth is providing by staying with her and returning to a foreign land where she may not even be welcomed culturally. In Ruth 1: 20-21, we see Naomi asking to be called Mara or bitter because she went away full and returned empty. She was blind to receiving compassion from Ruth, instead focusing on her anger.Faithful, Ruth redeems Naomi’s family lineage by being obedient and humble—ultimately marrying Boaz. In the end, God was compassionate on these women.We are not made to do life alone. In fact, we see this as a command over and over in Scripture. We need compassion from others in our life, but most of all we need the compassion of Jesus Christ over our lives.When we are overburdened, Jesus calls us to him.Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light (Matthew 11:28-30).He offers us peace.Peace, I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid (John 14:27).He tells us to abide with him.Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me (John 15:4).To me, the most compassionate part of all of this is knowing Jesus Christ died on the cross to bear my sins. This is the only way I have access to a Savior who carries my burdens, offers me peace, and helps me bear fruit if I am abiding with him.Jesus was compassionate to death.God has always wanted us to have access to his compassion. We see this repeatedly in the Old Testament.Isaiah 30:18 states: Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; therefore, he will rise up to show you compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice.Again, in Isaiah 49:13: Shout for joy, you heavens; rejoice, you earth, burst into song you mountains! For the Lord comforts his people and will have compassion on his afflicted ones.God loves us as his children. Psalm 103:13 states: As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him.The ultimate compassion from God IS Jesus Christ. For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son,
Presented by Lauren StibgenThe race is on! You are now officially on the countdown to Christmas. Are you shopping the black Friday deals right now? Trying to finish all your shopping in advance of your next holiday celebration? Sales on this one day are expected to reach $10 billion dollars. Yes, billion. The rush of endorphins that come from this touted day of deals can be fun, but how can you show compassion this season as you prepare to give to others? Rather than a quick rush, can you turn this feeling into a long-lasting seasonal glow?Let’s take a moment and orient ourselves to a biblical view on giving.First, it is the Lord who gives us power to get wealth (Deuteronomy 8:18). We are called to steward what God gives us in God’s way, not our own. Even Jesus reminds us in Matthew 6:24 that we cannot serve God and money. What would happen to these $10 billion dollars if even 10%—a tithe—went to things that God cares about? That would be $1 billion dollars! References about tithing can be found in Numbers 18:26, Malachi 3:10, and Deuteronomy 14:22.God gives us wealth; he reminds us we cannot serve him and money and tells us to bring our first fruits to him.Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work (2 Corinthians 9:7-8).Now, let’s think of who God asks us to show compassion to. Jesus is our greatest example of showing compassion.For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me (Matthew 25:35-36).God is good to give us a list of suggestions.As you shop on black Friday, are there deals that could help you buy gifts for children in need? Local giving trees make it easy to know what to buy. Many communities also have ways you can sponsor food for those in need or give toward a coat drive for those of our listeners in colder climates.
Presented by Lauren StibgenToday is traditionally a time for gathering with family and friends. We often find ourselves kicking off the day with a turkey trot run and watching a parade followed by eating too much food and rooting for our favorite football teams. Some of us find time to serve in our community, bringing food to the less fortunate or serving a meal. One thing I bet all of us are doing is having conversations at the table we probably shouldn’t have.We can all list the taboo topics of the table: politics, religion, money, marriage, friendly gossip. I mean, what better time to raise an issue than when we are all together! Cue the sarcasm. The aforementioned list is what NOT to talk about during your gathering. It has become too cultural to talk about what we talk about during the holidays.Maybe your family has gotten smart and placed some boundaries around what to talk about. With religion on the taboo list, you may think this doesn’t help those of us trying to share the gospel with a family member we hope will want to know more about Jesus. Perhaps you have had your faith attacked during the holidays. You feel hopeless when it comes to sharing your love of Jesus with those around you.Exodus 14:14 is one of my favorite bible verses:The Lord will fight for you, and you have only to be still (Exodus 14:14).In these tense moments, your silence can show compassion. It is a choice not to allow yourself to engage in a discussion that doesn’t bring glory to God. Having the power in silence to know the Lord is fighting for you can compel even more compassion.Instead of speaking, show great love to those around you by being present. Take interest in a conversation or maybe serve someone who has attacked your faith in the past. You are covered in the strength and mercy of the Lord.
Presented by Lauren StibgenI don’t know about you, but I started preparing Thanksgiving dinner yesterday! In between revising my budget and squeezing in some conference calls, I am preparing to host in our home. I know I am not alone! You know I love my statistics: 62% of respondents to a Harvard Medical School study reported stress levels were somewhat or very elevated during the holidays. You see where I am headed. Yesterday we talked about how over half of Americans are lonely or sad during the holidays, and now we are adding stress!Sometimes I can balance all this excitement for gathering and a good meal, but often I find myself exhausted and frankly lacking patience for those around me at work and at home. And my reflection of Christ, well…it is not very good. Being able to show compassion during the holiday truly depends on how I lean on the compassion Jesus Christ has for me!When I am feeling very stressed and overburdened, I am reminded of something Jesus said:Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light (Matthew 11:28-30).He calls me to come to him. He offers me rest. He offers to bare my burden by being yoked with me. If you don’t know what being yoked means, picture two animals that are bound together by a bar or “yoke” that rests on their shoulders. With this yoke, they must walk together in unison to get the job done. Anytime they aren’t in step, they cannot get the job done properly.We can never expect to get our job done properly without Jesus. When we forget he offers to be yoked with us, stress rises, and we forget that our most important job is to be his light in this world—especially in our homes during the holidays.It can be very tempting to make your lists and start your day early without spending time in God’s Word. For me, this is nonnegotiable time. When I don’t start my day in the word, it feels “off”. I find during the holiday, I need to set a few timers during my day to pause. During these quick two minutes mini-breaks, I focus on a small prayer or a bible verse I select. Maybe, for ease, use the one from Matthew 11:28-30 to remind you to let Jesus help you work! And when I am less than patient, I try to remember to apologize.
Presented by Lauren StibgenDuring these weeks, we see many spikes in feelings. Especially those of sadness and loneliness. Holidays are often steeped in traditions. We think of meals, being at someone’s house, maybe even the last conversation we had with a loved one. But maybe this year is different. It could be someone who moved far from home for a new job or maybe family who is grieving the loss of a loved one. Perhaps someone is facing illness. Whatever is causing this, the feelings are deep.Romans 12:15 calls us to rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep. We need to show compassion as these feelings come up, and we need to consider how to address them at work. Perhaps you are the one with these feelings, and if you are, know you are not alone. If you are not filled with these feelings and instead, are filled with excitement and joy for the season, consider the command of Romans 12:15.In either position, this verse makes one thing clear—we should not face these feelings alone or allow others around us to feel alone. A 2023 survey found 61% of Americans expect to feel lonely or sad during the holidays. Wow, that is over half our population!What could compassion look like during this season? As a manager or even as a colleague, I would suggest being a good listener and an even better question asker! Maybe you are already aware of someone’s hardship, but often, people keep to themselves because of embarrassment or for fear of burdening others.Ensuring those around you have the proper resources is important. Depending on how complex or deep their feelings are could orient how you should best respond. When someone shares a burden with you, here are some ways to respond with compassion.Offer to pray! Perhaps they are sad because they aren’t celebrating the same way they are used to, or maybe there is a struggle in their family. Offering to pray can help!Is there someone on your team spending the holiday alone? Perhaps extend an invitation to join your family for the holiday!Is a team member facing an illness or another hardship? If they can’t come spend the holiday with you, perhaps offering to help with their meal would go a long way.If you sense the person’s loneliness or sadness is very deep and they express anything that suggests self-harm or a lack of desire for living, this can be very troubling. Have your company’s information about employee assistance programs handy—especially during the holidays. Even suggesting they reach out to speak to someone may be the nudge they need to ask for help. Part of showing compassion is being ready!
Presented by Lauren StibgenFor many businesses, the end of the year can be one of the busiest seasons. Coupled with the holidays quickly approaching, we are managing the balance of work and family with extra care during this time. As a leader, or manager you are likely deep into planning for the next fiscal year and facing the results of the current year. As an employee, you may be thinking about the company’s results as well, and what this means for your job. Without a doubt, this season is filled with uncertainty.What does this have to do with compassion? When we face pressures at work, especially those that are financial in nature, it is easy to feel stress, and to focus on ourselves. First, if you are in a position to help set forth the financial plans in your company, a compassionate approach to budget formation might look different. Let’s think about Jesus feeding the 4000.Jesus called his disciples to him and said, “I have compassion for these people; they have already been with me three days and have nothing to eat. I do not want to send them away hungry, or they may collapse on the way” (Matthew 15:32).You know the story, his disciples fret and wonder how they will feed the crowds. They have seven loaves of bread and a few fish.Let’s think of a worldview response. You are the person with enough. You hold the bread and fish, but you keep them all for yourself instead of trying to compassionately share the little you have.As a leadership team, are you focused on your bonuses to the point of cutting other positions? Or are you thinking of ways to retain employees? Maybe you are considering cutting benefits programs that your employees rely on.Now, while I realize sometimes you are called to make hard choices. I would challenge you to pray and consider how Jesus would see your workforce. He sees them like the 4000. How are you seeing them?If you absolutely cannot influence your company and need to make cuts, what are things you can do for your employees? First, clear and compassionate communication is critical. If you do face a layoff, maybe it is a wonderful reference letter or an offer to make an introduction. Can you serve as a mentor in their search?As an employee, these seasons can be stressful as you hear the office buzz about budgets and cuts or a rumor about merit increases—maybe there will be none. The pressure mounts—especially as you try to plan holidays with family.You can have compassion too. I could tell you about the many women I pray with in leadership roles who have true broken hearts over decisions they have tried to compassionately influence but cannot. They are faced with making cuts and even having to often deliver bad news of a layoff. Being impacted feels so personal, but many of the Christian leaders I know are truly grieved at the impact they know job loss will have on their employees. I know many of our listeners don’t always work for a Christian leader. Consider the impact you might have on the person who delivers bad news to you. Your reaction just may change their life for the kingdom. Can you leave them asking why you are so hopeful? After all, God is compassionate for all of us. He loves us lavishly.And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:19).God is in control.
Paul wrote to the Colossians:So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live in him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness (Colossians 2:6-7).Overflowing with thankfulness—that's our goal if we have received Christ Jesus as our Lord and are continuing to grow in our faith. In other words, thankfulness is supposed to be a trademark of a Christian.Now, ask yourself this question: Would people who know you well—who are around you often and see you in real-life environments regularly—describe you as a thankful person? Do you overflow with thankfulness? If something is overflowing, people would notice, don't you think?This is a characteristic I've been trying to cultivate more and more in my life because I want to be thankful for all my many, many blessings. But also, because being thankful is a major stress buster! I'm not kidding; one of the best things you can do to reduce your stress, lower your blood pressure, and lengthen your life is to practice thankfulness.Notice I said, "practice thankfulness.” You see, it's really easy to get caught up in complaining because that's what we hear around us quite often. Don't you hear a good bit of griping and complaining where you work or even in your home? Well, you might have caught that disease without realizing it. So, you need to practice thankfulness.Ephesians 5:19b-20 says: Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. And in First Thessalonians 5:18 we're told to give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.Seems to me we have to find ways to remind ourselves to overflow with thankfulness. If you want to play the piano, you have to practice. If you want to dunk a basketball, you have to practice. Well, if you want to overflow with thankfulness, I think you have to practice that, too.Here are some suggestions to help you do that. Put a sign on your desk or refrigerator or your screen saver that says, "Overflow with thankfulness today.” I think we just sometimes need simple reminders. It sure won't hurt. Put on thankfulness each morning before you leave home. Colossians 3:12-15 gives us a list of garments we should put on each day as God's chosen people, and at the end of this list we read: And be thankful. So, while you're buttoning your shirt or putting on your shoes, just make a little ritual each day of saying, "And I'm also putting on thankfulness to wear all day today." Do the thankful alphabet. Start with A and go through Z, naming something starting with each letter for which you are thankful. You can have some fun with this; it's a great game to play in the car with your kids and you'll be teaching them to practice thankfulness. Just start and see how far you can get: A: I’m thankful for apples. B: I’m thankful for C: I’m thankful for cousins. D: I’m thankful for my dad. E: I’m thankful for Elizabeth, my friend. F: I’m thankful for football! And on you go. It’s fun, it’s uplifting, and it fills your heart with thanks. In fact, a fun idea might be to make a deck of alphabet thankful cards, which you can use at home or church or even on the job. Make every Tuesday a Thankful Tuesday or each Thursday a Thankful Thursday. You can share this with your family or your coworkers and have some fun with it, and it will teach the joy of practicing thankfulness. On that day be very intentional about expressing what you have to be thankful for, perhaps as the family gathers for a meal, or in a casual conversation with coworkers. Remind others that it’s Thankful Tuesday or Thursday and encourage them to recite what they have to be thankful for. You’ll be surprised how others will be willing to join in with you if you’ll just get it started. Sing songs of thanksgiving. You could sing "Give Thanks with a Grateful Heart" fo...
Instead of feeling guilty because you don't like certain people, acknowledge they are not likable to you, but agree with God that you are willing to love them. Love them with his kind of love—agape love—which is an action, not necessarily a feeling.It always helps to remember we're often unlikable to God, yet he never stops loving us. And it is that kind of love that should overflow from our lives to others. When that happens—when others can see we can love people who are not likable—we will have one of the strongest witnesses of God's grace we can ever have. You know if you can learn to love people you don't like, it has to be a miracle right from God. And that miracle in your life can cause others to be thirsty for the eternal water Jesus offers, which they see demonstrated in your life.Here's my suggestion: Make a plan to love those people you don't like. Make a list of the people you find it difficult to like. Include what it is about them that makes them unlikable to you. Then, choose one unlikable person per week to focus on. Pray for that specific person each day of that week. Pray for the things you see in their lives that make them so unlikable. Pray God will help you to see and understand them the way he does. Pray for God's love to overflow from you to that person in some specific way sometime during the week.If you will focus on one person per week and keep going through that list, what you'll discover is God can even change your feelings toward them. But regardless, you will be showing love to those unlikable people, and the changes you will see in yourself will astound you.When you start learning to love them, they no longer can get to you like they used to. Oh, they may still have irritating habits and personalities, but they just will not bug you like before. It's amazing how that happens. You realize, "Wow, I'm free from that awful dread of seeing them coming or having to deal with them, because even though I don't really like them, I really do love them the way Jesus does.”
I'm examining loving people we don't really like so much. And we've seen God's kind of love—agape love—is not based on feelings, but it is an action. Our job is to learn to act in loving ways toward people, even the ones we don't like.A prerequisite to developing love actions toward unlikable people is to pray for them. Sincerely, regularly pray for their welfare. Ask God to show you what love actions to take toward them. And pray for them. . . a lot! Jesus taught us to pray for our enemies, and those who despitefully use us.Then, as you think about a certain person you don't like, decide which love actions would be appropriate for that person. Maybe it’s a lot of patience? Or compassion or endurance? Then set your will to act with those love actions toward that person.A good friend shared how God put her in a job with people she just didn't like very much. She applied for a promotion, looking forward to moving away from those people. The selection process narrowed down to her and one other person, but she didn't get the job. And at first, she was angry at not being selected, until she realized God had left her in that job to learn how to love those people she didn't like.She began what she called Project Love, and she looked for ways to develop relationships with those unlikable people. Her method was to invite them to have lunch with her, one per week. And she began to build bridges to these people and develop relationships with them. Of course, in doing that, she discovered they had burdens and problems, and they discovered she was a caring person. A few months later, she got that promotion she wanted, but she continues to keep in touch with those unlikable people she has now learned to love—and indeed to like, too. Several of them have turned to her for help in troubled times.What a good idea—Project Love. Maybe you could start to find ways to reach out to those unlikable people with the love of Jesus Christ that is within you. What miracles we could see in our relationships if we'd do this more and more.
Do you have any people in your life right now you just don't like very much? Chances are you do. Yes, even Christians have to admit we run into people who just rub us the wrong way. The question I'm addressing is: how can I love the people I don't like?God hasn't told us to like everyone. There are people we simply cannot admire or enjoy. But Scripture gives us many directives to love others. We've seen God's kind of love—agape love—is not dependent on our feelings. Love is an action, not a feeling.Well, if love is an action, what actions then are love actions? First Corinthians 13 is a good place to look for a list of love actions. They include:Patience: When you act with patience toward someone, you are loving him or her. Keep in mind love is not a feeling, so we don't have to feel patient. Can you remember acting with patience even when you did not feel patient? That is agape love.Kindness: When you feel like saying something sarcastic or cutting or angry, but instead you say something kind, that is a love action.Not Jealous: When you refuse to behave jealously or possessively, you are showing love.Has Good Manners: Just plain courtesy is a love action. How often we forget good manners, like not interrupting others when they're talking, letting others go ahead of us, etc. Those are love actions.Unselfish: Agape love acts in an unselfish manner, without pursuing selfish advantage or trampling over others in trying to get where you want to get. Remember, don't wait to feel unselfish; show your love by acting unselfishly.Endurance: When other people have given up and left, agape love will still be there, hanging in with someone. It will endure all things. It will keep listening to someone, even when you think you cannot listen to another word.These are just a few of the many love actions available to us. And we can demonstrate these attitudes and actions toward people, whether we like them or not, by God's grace. Ask God to help you today to show love through your actions, even to that person you don't really like very much. Don't feel guilty about not liking them, just act toward them in loving ways, and watch what happens.
Aren't you glad God's love for us is not based on how he feels about us? He may be, and I'm sure often is, very displeased with us as individuals, yet his love and goodness toward us are constant. That encourages me, because it means God does not require me to have good feelings toward everyone, and like you, I've discovered there are people I just don't like.You don't have to like someone to love them. Webster defines like as to "feel an attraction, tenderness or affection for" someone. We say "I like you because..." and then list the things we like about the person.But agape love says, "I love you in spite of..."—in spite of the things about you I may not like. We don't have to feel guilty about not liking everyone. It's okay! But we are commanded to love others.Write it on a piece of paper and tape it to your mirror, your desk, over your sink, on your screen saver—wherever you will see it often: Love is not a feeling, love is an action!I'm sure there were people Jesus did not like. Ever read what he said to the religious hypocrites of his day? Pretty direct. I don't think he liked them very much at all. But I know he loved them, because he died for them. Love is not a feeling; love is an action. This is our responsibility—to love others, whether we like them or not.Paul said in his letter to the Romans the Holy Spirit, who was given to us, has poured out the love of God within our hearts (Romans 5:5). Think about God's love for you. John wrote: To us, the greatest demonstration of God's love for us has been his sending his only Son into the world to give us life through him. We see real love, not in the fact that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son to make personal atonement for our sins.And remember, God loves those people you don't like just as much as he loves you. Let God's love pour all over you and fill you. Remember how he loves you, even when you're not very lovable. That's the beginning of learning how to love other people, even the ones you don't like so much.
Are there people in your life you really don't like? We run into these people on our jobs quite often. I'm examining how to love the people you don't like.Yes, even Christians are allowed to have people in their lives they do not like. I know of no scriptural directive that commands us to like everyone. But I know many verses that tell us to love other people. Here are just two of many:And he has given us this command: Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister (1 John 4:21).Jesus said:If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them (Luke 6:32).It's clear as Christians we are to love people—all people, yes, even the people we work with. But what about those unlikable people? Since we cannot like them, we usually conclude we cannot love them either. Don't we have to like people before we can love them? How can we love someone we don't like?Part of the problem is we misunderstand the word love. The kind of love you need to love people you don't like is God's kind of love. Now, this love is not necessarily a feeling. Though you may experience nice feelings, agape love does not depend on how you feel.Agape love, God’s kind of love, is an action. The Bible tells us we know God loves us because he sent his Son into the world to redeem us. We know Jesus loves us because he gave his life. And God says he will know we love him if we keep his commandments. God's kind of love is an action, not a feeling.Now, that really is good news, because it tells me I can love people toward whom I do not necessarily have good feelings. I can love people toward whom I have no feelings at all. Think: Who are the people you will be dealing with today or tomorrow whom you really don't like? Will you ask God to help you understand how to love them, even though you don't like them?
Presented by Lisa BishopSeveral years ago, someone said something that left a deep impression on me. “Treat everyone as if their heart is breaking because it probably is.” Now, that may sound strange but let me explain. We know to be human is to experience suffering. No one on the planet will go through life without some form of hardship, heartache, loss, pain, or disappointment. We all will experience seasons of suffering; there’s no escaping it. You most likely have already experienced your own version of suffering, and everyone you come into contact with, if they haven’t already, will too. And that is the sentiment behind the thought, “Treat everyone as if their heart were breaking, because it probably is” … or has or will at some future time. So be mindful that there’s often more going on with people than meets the eye.You and I are acutely aware of our heartaches, yet we can often miss the clues when people around us are experiencing their own form of hardship. I’ve learned that suffering can wear many faces. It can express itself through anger, addiction, inflicting pain on others, outbursts, depression, anxiety, and pride, which can be an unconscious defense against vulnerability and the hidden pain of shame.I don’t like to admit it, but I can find myself getting impatient when people act out or do not behave the way that I think they “should.” It can be easier to turn to judgment rather than curiosity. What I mean is that we can be prone to making judgments about a person’s behavior rather than taking the time to understand the underlying issues that may be driving it.In his book, A Grief Observed, a collection of reflections on his experience of heartache following the death of his wife, theologian C.S. Lewis writes, “I sat with anger long enough until she told me her real name was grief.” [1]Isn’t that such a deep and profound insight?When we witness a co-worker’s outburst or a friend’s off-putting behavior, are we quick to distance ourselves or to come alongside to see what grief, pain, or disappointment they may be hiding behind? While the customs of the world teach us to criticize and condemn when people act that way, you and I, as image bearers of Jesus, are called to a higher way.In his letter to the church in Colasse, the Apostle Paul gave a clear call to followers of Jesus. As God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, along with kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience (Colossians 3:12).The definition of compassion is, “The deep awareness of the suffering of another accompanied by the desire to relieve it.”To clothe yourself is to intentionally put on compassion and let it drive your heart and your actions.Compassion goes beyond empathy. Empathy is about putting yourself in someone else’s position and feeling what they might feel in a situation. Empathy is a necessary emotion and something we should regularly make a habit of. Empathy takes time to listen to others, deeply listen, without judgment or agenda.When you listen empathically to someone you are not trying to fix them or give them advice; you have a heart posture to truly seek to understand, be present, and listen in a way that the person feels heard and valued.Compassion takes empathy a step further. Compassion is about recognizing someone's emotions and wanting to help them. It’s “empathy in action.” More than words or sentiments, compassion not only listens, but it also responds in a way that desires to come alongside and lend a helping hand.We know compassion is a characteristic of God. As his image bearers, Jesus has given us the ability to feel compassion and be moved by it to act on behalf of others. We see the compassion of the Lord on display throughout the Old Testament as well as numerous stories of the compassion of Jesus in the New Testament.In the gospel of Luke, an expert of religious law asked Jesus:
Presented by Lisa BishopToday let’s examine community.Are you a part of a Christian community? Specifically, do you regularly attend a local church? If not, you could be missing out on growing in compassion.The writer of Hebrews encourages community when he says,And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching (Hebrews 10:24-25).Community is vital to your spiritual journey. It provides the support, accountability, and encouragement to live out your faith wholistically.When we isolate ourselves, we miss the opportunity to learn from each other, share our burdens, and lift one another up. Compassion flourishes in connection. Compassion thrives in the context of relationships.When we engage with one another, we become aware of each other’s struggles and needs. Without community, we become disconnected from the realities of people’s lives. We may miss the chance to support a friend in crisis or comfort someone who’s grieving. Compassion requires intimacy, and intimacy can only flourish when we are present and engaged.In 1 Corinthians 12:26, Paul describes the church as a body, emphasizing that if one part suffers, every part suffers with it. When we isolate ourselves, we can easily become indifferent and insensitive to the pain of others. But when we are part of a community, we share in each other’s joys and sorrows. This shared experience fosters empathy and compassion, reminding us that we are all interconnected in the body of Christ.In community, we can confront our biases and fears that hinder our compassion.The early church exemplified what it meant to live in community. They devoted themselves to teaching, fellowship, breaking bread, and prayer. Their love for one another was evident, and it drew others to Christ (Acts 2:42-47).If you are not part of a local Christian community, can I encourage you to find a church near you that is committed to the truth of God’s word and growing in the fruit of the Holy Spirit?Lack of community can hinder compassion but when we intentionally engage with one another, we grow in love and empathy, allowing us to better reflect Christ's heart to the world.
Presented by Lisa BishopLet’s examine another compassion killer, jealousy.Jealousy most often arises from comparison—comparing our finances to others, our careers, our titles at work, the amount of credit or time in the spotlight we get compared to a coworker on our team. Our relationship status, our house, kids, car, spouse, our looks, the list goes on and on. When we compare our lives to others it can lead to a feeling of lack, which can ultimately lead to resentment that poisons our relationships. When we compare ourselves to others, our hearts can go cold and be driven to apathy, insensitivity, and animosity.For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice (James 3:16).Jealousy creates a barrier that prevents us from expressing genuine care for others and celebrating their good fortune.Jesus embodied compassion and taught us to do the same.In Luke 15, Jesus shares an example of compassion (and lack of it) through the parable of the prodigal son.In this story, we learn a man had two sons. We see the younger one demanding his inheritance and leaving his father’s household only to live recklessly, squander everything he had, and drive his life into the ground.When he runs out of money and finds himself destitute, he decides to return home. Instead of acting in anger and disowning him, his father responds with compassion and joy and welcomes him with open arms. When his father sees him approaching, he feels compassion and runs and embraces him and kisses him (Luke 15:20).His older brother on the other hand is filled with anger and jealousy rather than compassion for his brother's poor choices. He says,Look! All these years I’ve been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him! (Luke 15:29-30).In his eyes, his younger brother did not deserve the warm and joyous homecoming.The bottom line is jealousy kills compassion and can cause us to act in ways that are not becoming of a follower of Jesus. When we focus on our own blessings and practice gratitude, rather than comparing them to the good fortune of others we can free ourselves from the grip of jealousy, trust in God’s provision, and allow compassion to thrive.
Presented by Lisa Bishop
Let’s examine a total hindrance to showing the tenderness of Jesus, and that’s unforgiveness.
Jesus addressed forgiveness directly in Matthew 18:21-22 when Peter asks how many times he should forgive someone who sins against him. Jesus responds, I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times. This radical call to forgive is rooted in the holy understanding that holding onto grudges only harms us and hinders our ability to love others.
When I think of forgiveness, I am always struck by the story of Joseph and his brothers. I highly recommend reading the full story in Genesis but here is the gist. Out of animosity and anger, Joseph’s older brothers plotted to kill him. While their hatred did not end in murder, they sold Joseph into slavery in Egypt, which set off a slew of circumstances, not all of them favorable for Joseph. While he initially found favor with Pharaoh and became a trusted leader in his household, in a turn of events, Joseph came under false accusation and endured jail time.
Things eventually ended up in Joseph’s favor because God’s favor was on him, but his brother’s actions set off a firestorm of hardship for Joseph. Years later when Joseph was confronted with his brothers, instead of holding a grudge and exacting punishment, he chose to forgive them.
Not many of us will experience someone trying to take our life, but we may experience someone trying to ruin our reputation, a coworker or boss who acts rudely or in ways that cause us to feel belittled, a roommate who violates a living agreement or maybe a friend who betrays a confidence. I am not saying any of those things are excusable behaviors, but as followers of Jesus, we are commanded to forgive.
Unforgiveness will impact every area of your life. It quenches the work of the Holy Spirit and causes depression, anxiety, and anger. Unforgiveness leaks into other areas of our lives, and it hardens our hearts.
Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you (Ephesians 4:32).
When we cling to unforgiveness, we shut ourselves off from the very compassion we are called to extend. Who in your life may God be calling you to forgive? Can I encourage you to surrender your bitterness to Jesus? Let his compassion for your hurt transform your heart so you can overflow with compassion for others.
Presented by Lisa Bishop
We’re examining five compassion killers—things that can hinder our compassion toward others. Let’s tackle another compassion killer, and that’s busyness.
In our fast-paced world, it’s easy to become so preoccupied with our own lives that we are not in tune with what others around us are going through. When we’re consumed by our schedules, juggling work, family, and countless responsibilities, rushing from one task or activity to another, we may miss ways to see and step into the pain and needs of others. In his ministry, Jesus modeled a different approach. He often paused amid the chaos, offering kindness and attention and engaging with those in need, and he calls us to slow down and look around—to look for opportunities to do the same.
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God (2 Corinthians 1:3-4).
We have been comforted so we can be conduits of compassion to others. Maybe a coworker is experiencing a personal loss, disappointment in being passed over for a promotion, or another challenging life event.
A way we can show compassion is by listening empathically. When we listen empathically, we are not trying to fix someone, give them advice, or share our “that happened to me too” stories.
Rather we listen with the intent to deeply understand another person in a way they feel heard and valued. Think of the last time someone truly listened to you. In difficult times, genuine listening can help people pull through. What distractions might be blinding you to the suffering of others?
Take time this week to spend a moment in silence, reflect and ask yourself, “What in your life pulls you away from being present with others? How can you carve out time to be more aware of those around you? What would it require of you to step into the needs of others? Maybe it’s courage or sacrificing your time or comfort.
Before the start of your workday, make it a habit to pray. Ask the Holy Spirit, “Who can I demonstrate compassion toward today?”
When we slow down long enough to be present to those around us, Jesus shows us many opportunities for his compassion to flow through us.
Presented by Lisa Bishop
We are examining five things that can squash our compassion for others. Let’s call them, “compassion killers.” I know, not exactly the most compelling title, but you get the point. We know compassion is a character of Jesus you and I are called to emulate, yet it can sometimes be difficult to communicate.
Let’s start out by getting a baseline understanding of compassion. Compassion is being so moved emotionally and internally when we see someone experiencing pain or suffering, that we are compelled to act outwardly in a way that comes alongside and shows care. Compassion is accompanied by a desire to help alleviate a person’s distress in some way.
What can stifle the beautiful gift of compassion in our hearts? The fact that we at times can have a hard time grasping and receiving the compassion that has been shown to us by Jesus.
As a father shows compassion to his children, so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear him (Psalm 103:13).
Growing up, many of us may not have experienced a compassionate earthly father, so trying to grasp and take in the fact that God your heavenly Father longs to show you compassion can be hard.
The Lord longs to be gracious to you; therefore, he will rise up to show you compassion (Isaiah 30:18).
As a follower of Jesus, the Lord has compassion on you. If you find it difficult to receive and experience the compassion of God, it will be very difficult for you to genuinely overflow it to others.
Think about how many times you have belittled yourself, been self-critical, or berated yourself for a shortcoming or a mistake. Or I wonder how many times you have gone through a difficult time and rather than receiving the merciful voice of compassion from God, you find your self-talk saying, “just get over it.”
When we have a “suck it up” attitude rather than settling into the loving and grace-filled heart of Jesus, our hearts can grow numb and calloused and lack the capacity for compassion.
If you are struggling to feel the compassion of Jesus towards you, ask him to help you. Ask the Holy Spirit to highlight any faulty thinking about God, yourself, or false beliefs about your worth and identity in him. Wherever it is, the Lord will surely show you because he longs to be gracious to you. And when you experience compassion to greater degrees, you will be compelled to have compassion toward others.
God’s love has the power to transform us. Have you experienced his transforming love? Perhaps you have been born from above through faith in Jesus Christ, but you still aren’t basking in the incredible truth that the God of the universe loves you—knows your name, is intimately acquainted with all your ways, wrote all your days in his book before one of them came to be, and holds you in the palm of his hand. The Apostle John refers to himself in his Gospel as “the one Jesus loves,” not arrogantly or proudly, because of course he knew God so loved the world that he gave his only Son. But his identity was based on the knowledge that Jesus loved him.
I want to encourage you to make it a point to start each day by reminding yourself of this mind-blowing truth—you are the one Jesus loves. The more you are aware of God’s love for you, primarily displayed in Jesus, the more that love will transform you and the more you’ll be able to love others in ways that will transform them.
In part one of this talk, I encouraged you to start each day reading 1 Corinthians 13, which is the ultimate description of God’s kind of love, the love we should be expressing to others. And we saw that love is an action, not necessarily a feeling. It is choosing to act in loving ways, whether your emotions cooperate or not. And when we begin to act in loving ways, good things happen.
For example, here’s a couple of changes that are often the result of loving people with God’s kind of love:
- Love has the power to inspire someone to greatness.
Do you know someone who is wasting their potential? Maybe they don’t even know they have potential, or perhaps they’re fearful of trying. I wonder if they knew you see potential in them, if you loved them by encouraging them, could it empower them to reach their potential?
Do you remember when Jesus called Simon as a disciple and gave him the name of Peter? He referred to Peter as a rock and said Peter would play a pivotal role in establishing the early church and spreading the gospel. Was Simon Peter a rock when Jesus called him? No, he had a long way to go before he reached “rock status,” but Jesus called him what he would become, and Peter became the rock of the early church.
I have a dear friend who many years ago was bothered by a stutter. But I saw potential in her; she had the instincts of a performer, and so I encouraged her to take small parts in a ministry at church that put her in front of people. She loved doing it, so she joined Toastmasters, where she learned to make presentations. Now she is very polished and gifted as a speaker and actor, and that stutter has been conquered. I just loved the potential I saw in her, and she has done what she never thought she could do as a result.
- Love has the power to heal wounds and bind up the brokenhearted.
I love this verse from Isaiah 61:1
The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners.
We have the incredible privilege as we spread the love of Jesus to help people find freedom from their past, freedom from what has held them in bondage. And when you reach out to such a person because of your love for them and your desire to see them released from their darkness, you become an agent of transformation.
I think of a woman who knew something was missing in her life, even though she was very successful, had the job she always dreamed of, and made the money she planned to make. Then a coworker lived the gospel in front of her, every day showing peace and kindness and contentment in a place where chaos reigned. Finally, she started a conversation with him, and he encouraged her to read the Bible. After several months and many conversations, she came to saving faith in Jesus, and her life was totally transformed—totally. His love for Jesus and his confidence in who he was in Jesus overflowed to her and transformed her life.
Love has the power to transform people and situations and workplaces and homes and churches. But we must consistently be attuned to how much we are loved by God, growing in the knowledge of his love for us, so that we have love to share with others.
Listen to this prayer that the Apostle Paul prayed for the church in Ephesus:
And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love,may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God (Ephesians 3:17b-19).
I just love Paul’s phrase—to know the love that surpasses knowledge. How can you know something beyond knowing? Well, that’s the way God’s love is. It is so wide and long and high and deep that we will spend all of eternity exploring the depths of God’s love. And because his love is spread abroad in our hearts through faith in Jesus Christ, it fills us up to the measure of all the fullness of God. And that fullness then overflows to those around us. It’s such a wonderful truth.
Loving and being loved is a true basic necessity of life. We were created by God with this need to love and be loved. This need is at the core of your being, and if you don’t feel you are loved, it leaves a huge empty space in your sense of worth and value.
The sad truth is if you grew up without feeling loved as you should have, it can leave you emotionally needy, and that means you can’t love others as you should. You don’t have love to give, so to speak. This lack of love and loving then can lead to all kinds of emotional and mental problems, such as resentment, bitterness, a judgmental spirit, depression. And then your lack of love from others begets more lack of love from you to others. It becomes a vicious cycle.
This great need for love can lead you to look for love in all the wrong places, as the song goes, and put you on an endless quest for acquiring love. That quest actually takes you further and further away from true, unconditional love. Can you relate to this? No doubt you know people who are on or have been on that futile quest for love.
Here’s the incredibly good news: God’s love for you can fill up that emptiness inside, which then gives you the ability to love others, and then you’ll discover the love you give others comes back to you. We get love by giving it away, and we have love to give away because we know we are loved by Jesus.
So, if you want to fill up your inner coffers with love, find some ways today to love others. Who is in your life today who needs some love? How can you give them love?
Here are a few suggestions:
- Practice the ministry of presence—spend time with someone who just needs your presence. You don’t have to do anything special; just make it a point to be with them for some period of time.
- Be empathetic: Love may involve empathy, sympathy, or compassion for someone in your life.
- Let someone know you are praying or will pray for them—and then be sure you do.
- Express appreciation when someone has made an effort to do something.
- Be patient with someone who is not doing what they should do. Give them a little more time.
- Make it a point to express love toward those closest to you, even when they aren’t as lovable as you would like.
It doesn’t take much to share love with someone else. We just have to remember to do it because love is an action. We need to pray that God will help us to become lovers—people who willingly and frequently share his love with others. Remember, love begets love.
When was the last time you told someone, “I love you”? I hope it hasn’t been long since you expressed love to someone, and I hope it hasn’t been long since someone returned that expression of love to you. Love has the power to transform us, both as givers and receivers of love.
That’s why Paul wrote to the Corinthians that love never fails. What else in life can you say, “never fails”? The best computer you can buy can and does fail. A best friend can fail you. The best job can fail to deliver what you need or want. God can never fail you, and God is love. So, love never fails.
It never fails to transform that person who is difficult, though it may take longer than you want. I remember when a friend of mine, Beth, worked for a very difficult manager; no one liked her; she was demanding, unfriendly, sour—just a miserable person. God used a verse—Proverbs 19:6—to tell Beth how to show love to this woman. That verse says, Many curry favor with a ruler, and everyone is the friend of one who gives gifts. She knew God wanted her to give this woman a gift on her birthday.
So, she bought something small but thoughtful and wrote a note thanking her for pursuing excellence and left it on her desk on her birthday. This simple act of love transformed that woman, and she and Beth became friends from that point on. With tears in her eyes, she said to Beth that no one had ever given her a birthday gift before. Because Beth was willing to obey God’s voice to show love to this woman, it transformed her, filling up a huge empty space inside of her and changing that relationship.
Love is powerful. It never fails. So, I hope you will more and more bask in the incredibly good news that God loves you and nothing can separate you from his love. And then you will become more and more intentional about loving others. It has the power to transform you, your relationships, your attitude, your productivity—love transforms us. Believe me, it’s true.
We have prepared a bookmark for you with 1 Corinthians 13 on it to help you remember to read this love chapter every day. Remembering that love is described as an action rather than a feeling will truly help you become better at sharing God’s love.
Fran had lunch with Joyce, an assistant in her department, who is a single mom like Fran. Jesus has asked Fran to pray for Joyce and try to get to know her.
As they eat lunch, Joyce pours out her story of her ex-husband’s negligence in paying child support and the day care center that is threatening to refuse to take her son because Joyce is behind in her payments. As Joyce brushes away tears, Fran says to her, “Oh, Joyce, I understand; there’s nothing more important than your son and his care while you work. How much money do you owe the day care center?”
“I’m behind about $400. And Fran, I just don’t have any money,” Joyce replies.
“What about your family?” Fran asks, “Can they help you?”
“Family? Are you kiddin’? My family…” her voice trails off. It’s too painful for her to even talk about.
An idea occurs to Fran, and she says, “Look, Joyce, our church has a fund to help people who are in financial trouble. As a member, I can request help for you. Would it be okay if I request that they help you pay what you owe the day care center?”
Joyce looks at Fran in bewilderment. “You’d do that for me? But why?”
“Why? Just because you need help, and I want to help you. I’d pay it myself if I could. Now, I can’t guarantee they’ll do it, but at least I can ask. Okay?”
“Yeah, okay…” Joyce puts her head in her hands and sobs quietly.
Fran reaches across the table and takes her hand. “You know, Joyce, it’s not an accident that I invited you to lunch today, is it? I believe it’s God’s way of showing you he loves you and is going to take care of you.”
Joyce looks up. “I’m not sure I even believe there is a God, Fran, but I appreciate your help. Sorry I’m so emotional; it’s just that…well, I’ve been so worried about Toby. You’ve at least given me some hope.”
Well, Fran has discovered that Joyce is in her life so that she can show her the love of Jesus. Anybody in your life right now who needs some compassion and understanding? Remember, that person is not in your life by accident.
Fran is learning from Jesus that she can show compassion toward people, even when she doesn’t really like them. Fran’s challenge from Jesus is to get to know Joyce, an assistant in her department who is negative and lazy. He has suggested she first pray for Joyce every day and then invite her to lunch.
It’s the next day, and Fran did pray for Joyce before she left home and asked Jesus to help her see Joyce the way he sees her. As Fran arrives at the office, she looks for Joyce to invite her to lunch. Joyce gives Fran a sour look.
“You got more changes to that proposal?” she asks with irritation.
“No,” Fran replies with a chuckle, “I just wanted to know if you’re available for lunch, Joyce—my treat?”
The look on Joyce’s face is a mixture of surprise and suspicion. “What’s this all about?”
“Not about anything—just lunch,” Fran responds. Joyce agrees, reluctantly, and they set up a time.
After her morning meeting, Fran walks out to Joyce’s desk, and finds her talking on the phone to a friend. She hangs up, and they head next door to the coffee shop. As they sit down Joyce looks at Fran nervously and says, “You’ve had me worried all morning. I figure you’re gonna chew me out about something.”
Fran looks in her eyes and for the first time sees the fear and loneliness there. She says, “No, Joyce, honestly, no hidden agenda here. I just realized yesterday that you and I have worked together for six months but I really don’t know you. I realized we have something in common. I’m a single mom, like you.”
Joyce is still a little suspicious, but she starts to relax. “Yeah, I know. It’s tough, isn’t it? How do you manage with two kids? I can barely make it with one.”
Fran replies, “Well, my kids are a little older, but I remember the terrible two’s. Your son is two, right? What’s his name?”
“Toby,” Joyce’s face lights up as she starts to talk about her son. “Yeah, he’s a hand full, but he’s so cute.” She shows Fran a picture.
“Who keeps him while you work?” Fran asks.
“Day care center—very expensive. In fact, I’m behind in paying them. My ex hasn’t paid any support in months,” Joyce pours out her story to Fran. “I don’t know what I’m going to do, Fran.” Tears start down her cheek, and she quickly tries to hide them.
Fran thinks, “You’re right, Lord, this woman needs a friend. She’s not in my life by accident.”
If you’ve ever had difficulty with a lazy co-worker, you’ll relate to this Fran and Jesus story. Fran is dealing with an assistant who is very lazy, and Fran finds it hard to like her. Jesus has been helping her learn how to deal with this coworker named Joyce.
On the way home from work this day, after a confrontation with Joyce, Fran says to Jesus, “Lord, I could see a slight change in Joyce after I tried to find the right words to motivate her. Thanks for bringing that verse from Proverbs to my mind about choosing my words carefully. But really, I shouldn’t have to baby her just to get her to do her work. Nobody babies me.”
“Well, nobody babies you, that’s true, but you do have someone to help you,” Jesus reminds her. “You see, Fran, you have to keep remembering Joyce doesn’t have my presence with her like you do. Have you ever thought about what her life must be like? Do you know her at all?”
“Know her? Well, all I know is she’s divorced, has a two-year-old boy, I think, and from what I hear, has a lot of financial problems.” Fran tries to piece together what she does know about Joyce. “Someone told me she’s in the bars a lot, looking for guys and getting drunk.”
“You know, Fran, you have some things in common with Joyce. Why don’t you get to know her better?” Jesus suggests.
“You mean because I’m a single mom, too? Yeah, but beyond that we certainly don’t have anything in common. She’s not my type, Jesus; I don’t think so,” Fran tries to dismiss the suggestion.
“She’s my type, Fran, and she’s not in your life by accident,” Jesus repeats what he told her earlier.
“Okay, okay—so what do you want me to do?” Fran asks.
“First, I want you to pray for her every day. Then I suggest you invite her to lunch and just get to know her better,” Jesus replies.
“Pray for her and invite her to lunch. Yeah, I guess I can do that,” Fran agrees. “Can’t say I want to, but since you suggested it, I will.”
“You know, Fran, this gives you an opportunity to show compassion to a person who isn’t exactly ‘your type. That’s what I would do,” Jesus encourages Fran.
“Well, okay, I’ll do my best, but you know I’ll need your help because I don’t feel like doing it,” Fran confesses.
“I’ll be right there with you. You can count on me,” Jesus assures her.
And with that they pull in her driveway, and Fran puts on her “mother hat” to begin her second and most important job with her two children.
What does it mean to show compassion to someone who irritates you? Fran is running into that problem at work, as we continue our story of Fran and Jesus on the Job. This ongoing story is told to remind all of us that Jesus is with us at all times, and we need to be aware of his presence. It truly makes a difference, as Fran has learned many times.
Today Fran is rushing to get a proposal revised and her assistant, Joyce, tends to be lazy and less than helpful. Expecting a negative reaction, Fran heaves a sigh and heads to Joyce’s desk. “Joyce, here are the last changes to the Walton proposal. Please make those changes and reprint it for me. I’ll need it before you leave today if you don’t mind,” Fran says, trying to sound pleasant.
“If I don’t mind?” Joyce replies. “Well, I do mind. It’s 4:00, and I leave here at 4:30. Why’d you wait so late to give it to me?” Joyce snatches it from Fran’s hand as she slowly puts down the magazine she was reading.
“Joyce, I just got the changes from Marilyn. You know it has to be done today. Sorry, but that’s the way it is,” Fran says with irritation in her voice.
Jesus nudges Fran. “Remember, sweetness of speech increases persuasiveness.” Jesus brings a verse from Proverbs to her mind.
“But, Lord,” she replies, “all I’m asking is for her to do her job. If she’d get busy, she could have it done pretty fast. I just don’t feel like babying her; she doesn’t deserve it.”
“If you run on your feelings, Fran,” Jesus reminds her, “you’ll never be able to be a consistently compassionate person because you won’t always feel like it.”
Fran turns to Joyce again, and with great effort says, “Look, Joyce, I know it’s late; I wish I could have gotten it to you sooner. But I really would appreciate your help. I don’t think you’ll have to work much past 4:30. I’ll be in my office if you have any questions.”
“Much better,” Jesus whispers to Fran.
She says, “Well, I said it through clinched teeth.”
“That’s okay,” he replies, “you showed some compassion instead of showing your irritation.”
“Well,” she whispers back, “I would never have done it if you hadn’t been here.”
“That’s the whole idea, Fran,” Jesus says to her. “That’s why I’m with you all the time—to give you the power to do what you could never do by yourself.”
Joyce’s voice almost startles Fran. “Okay, well, yeah—okay, I’ll try to get it done.” Fran can see a slight change in her attitude.
“Thanks, Joyce,” she says.
Getting along with coworkers is not always the easiest thing to do, is it? I’m exploring our story of Fran and Jesus on the Job, as Fran runs into a problem with one of her coworkers. I continue these episodes because many of you have told me they really help you to understand that Jesus is with you all day on your job, and you’ve been practicing his presence better as a result.
On this particular day Fran is rushing to get a proposal finished for an early meeting tomorrow with a new prospect. She thinks, “I’ll be glad when this is finished; Marilyn made a few more changes. Now I’ve got to get Joyce to make the changes and reprint it. I just dread even approaching Joyce. She has such a rotten attitude. When you ask her to do anything, she’s as sour as a lemon, she’s lazy, and her work is poor.”
She can hear the quiet voice of Jesus say: “Yes, she presents a challenge for you, doesn’t she?”
“Well, challenge is a nice way to put it. She drives me crazy! After all, she is the assistant for the department. It’s her job to help us with these projects. But she acts like she’s doing you a favor when she does her job. I just can’t stand people with lazy attitudes.” Fran expresses her feelings.
“Fran,” Jesus quietly responds, “don’t forget, no one is in your life by accident.”
Fran stops in her tracks to ponder that thought. “No one is in my life by accident? Yeah, but…” Fran pauses. “You mean, Lord, you have purposely allowed Joyce into my life? You want to cause me grief and frustration? What good does Joyce do me?” Fran’s self-centered thoughts are showing.
Again, she can hear Jesus say, “You may not think Joyce is doing you any good, but have you forgotten I often work in you through other people? And besides, Joyce needs you in her life.”
Fran really doesn’t want to hear that. She knows she should be compassionate and caring toward Joyce, but that’s just asking too much. “Look, Lord, all Joyce has to do is what she’s paid to do. I’m not supposed to baby her when she’s so lazy, am I?”
“No, not baby her, but love her,” Jesus responds. “You know, I love her—just as much as I love you.”
Fran wrinkles her nose. Not exactly what she wanted to hear.
When we talk about being transformed, we’re talking about something very strong. It’s not a word to throw around because it means a real change in our nature or character or appearance. It signifies a turning point, something permanent, not temporary. So, what would you identify as the transformational points in your life? What person or situation or event has made a truly significant difference in your life—for the better?
If you think carefully about it, my guess is that the transformational points in your life came as a result of love. Love has the power to transform us.
For example, getting to know Jesus and accepting his gift of salvation certainly transforms our nature, doesn’t it? The Bible says we become new creations in Christ; the new has come, the old has gone. The love of God transforms us like no other love ever could.
No wonder John 3:16 is the favorite verse in the Bible for many people. For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. It’s because of this incredible love we can have eternal life. I love the old hymn that begins “Loved with everlasting love, led by grace that love to know.” And then ends by declaring, “In a love that will not cease, I am his and he is mine.” (George Wade Robinson, “Loved with Everlasting Love,” 1838-1877).
Knowing I am the one Jesus loves has transformed me. How about you? I simply can’t get through that hymn without tears of joy just knowing how God—the God of all the universe—loves me. Love is transformational. There’s no doubt about it.
Have you been transformed by the power of the love of Jesus? Have you accepted his free gift of salvation by confessing your sins and believing that he is the Son of God who paid the price for your sin, because he loves you? If not, there is no doubt you have an empty space inside of you that is love-starved for Jesus, and I would urge you even today to simply confess your sins to him and accept the love he offers.
It is God’s love for us that transforms us, and then, it is our privilege and responsibility to share that love with others. Romans 5:5 tells us that God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us. When we are born into God’s family through faith in Jesus Christ, the Holy Spirit comes to live in us, and he simply pours God’s love into our hearts.
Then, when we have received God’s unconditional love, we are admonished throughout Scripture to love as we have been loved by God.
John 13:34- 35: A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.
Romans 12:10: Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.
Matthew 22:37- 39: Jesus replied: ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’
Is there someone in your life right now who is trouble for you? Could be a co-worker or a boss, a child or a mate, a friend or foe. You know what they need? Love. I know—they’re probably not very lovable right now, but that doesn’t change the fact that they need love! What could you do today to show love to that person—undeserved, unconditional love? Maybe it’s a phone call or a note or a gift or a listening ear. Maybe it’s a lack of criticism and condemnation, a willingness to love them as they are, in their unlovable condition.
But here’s the roadblock we often encounter: How can you love someone when you don’t feel it? How can you show love when someone isn’t loving you back; when they are not lovable; when they may not deserve your love? Well, this is where God’s love in us has to kick in, and the good news is, love—God’s kind of love—is expressed in actions, not necessarily in feelings.
In 1 Corinthians 13 we have the definitive description of how you love someone, whether you feel it or not. We are given specific actions and behaviors we can choose to exhibit whether or not we feel them. Consider these love actions:
- Love is patient and kind. Does patience come easy for you? It doesn’t for me; but when you and I choose to be patient with someone, we are showing love. And when we are kind to someone who is not kind to us, we are loving them. You do it by choice, not by feelings, but you do it—and it is credited to you as love!
- Love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. Well, that’s pretty practical and down-to-earth, isn’t it? For example, if you hear your friend just got a raise or a great new job or a new house or got married, and you choose to rejoice with her instead of envying her, you have chosen to love her. If you intentionally refrain from boasting about yourself or your accomplishments, you are loving others. If you are not rude to that person who just cut in line in front of you, even though you want to say something, you have chosen the path of lo
- Love does not rejoice in wrong doing, but rejoices with the truth. This pretty much eliminates gossip, doesn’t it? A loving person simply does not get any joy in passing along bad news about other people. Instead, she assumes the best instead of the worst and is never part of gossip or malicious talk.
- Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love simply hangs in there with people, never giving up, always hoping for the best, listening when you don’t want to listen anymore, believing that God can turn any person, any situation around.
I encourage you—indeed, I challenge you — to read 1 Corinthians 13 every day for a week. Just begin each day reading this incredible definition of what true love is—what you can do every day to be a lover of people. It would take you maybe five minutes to read it, and it will transform your thinking. Learning to see love as actions, not feelings, will make a huge difference, and it will transform the way you see others, which will in turn transform the way you treat others, which may well transform the way they respond and react to you. It could start a “trickle-down effect” that will astonish you.
We’ve created a bookmark with this chapter on it, which makes it very handy to keep with you and read each day. You will find it on our website—christianworkingwoman.org—and it can be easily printed.
Don’t you agree we often get so busy in our day-to-day lives that we forget to stop and express love? Frankly, I find I’m always ready to receive love but not always prepared to give it. I’ve learned that I have to become intentional about expressing love; I have to remember to do it. I often take for granted the love I receive from others—my family and friends—without focusing on the expressions of love they need from me.
Love is transformational. We can become God’s agents of change to people in our lives by simply taking time each day to give love, and love can be given in many different ways, as we’ve seen from 1 Corinthians 13.
Here’s how you can start practicing love—becoming an intentional lover. It begins when you allow God’s love for you to fill up the emptiness inside you. When your need to be loved is met as you more and more understand your identify in Jesus’ love for you, when you daily remind yourself that you are the one Jesus loves—that is what gives you value and significance. Then, knowing you are loved by the one true God, you can love others, and you’ll discover the love you give others comes back to you. We get love by giving it away. We have love to give away because we know we are loved by Jesus.
So, not only does God’s love for you fill you up and satisfy you, as you start giving love to others, that love comes back to you and fills you up again. Because of this, you’re overflowing with the knowledge that God loves you, and you are enriched by the love you receive from others.
Love is powerful. It never fails. So, I hope you will more and more bask in the incredibly good news that God loves you and nothing can separate you from his love. And then you will become more and more intentional about loving others. It has the power to transform you, your relationships, your attitude, your productivity. Love transforms us. Believe me, it’s true.
So, who is in your life today? How can you give them love? Here are some suggestions:
- Find something good about that person or people and express it in words to them.
- Listen to someone’s story without criticizing or lecturing them—even without giving advice.
- Call someone who is needy and say, “I’m here for you if you need me.”
- Compliment someone on a job well done, an attractive outfit, a kindness offered.
- Smile!
It doesn’t take much to share love with someone else. We just have to remember to do it. So, of course, we need to pray that God will help us to become lovers—people who willingly and frequently share his love with others. Remember, love begets love. Try it! You won’t be sorry you did.
Presented by Lisa BishopWe are examining the 5 attitudes for everyday life, and today let’s look at what the apostle Paul writes about having a Christ-like attitude.Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus (Philippians 2:3-5).These verses challenge us to align our attitudes with the very heart and mind of Jesus. They’re a reminder we are called to reflect Jesus in our daily lives.But what does it mean to have a Christ-like attitude?First, it means embracing humility. Even though he was God, Jesus didn’t cling to his divine privileges. Instead, he emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant (Philippians 2:7). A Christ-like attitude doesn’t elevate self, seek status or recognition, but is willing to serve others selflessly. When we have an attitude like Jesus we find joy in lifting others up. We find ways to be generous with our words, our finances, our resources, and our time, even when it costs us something.Second, a Christ-like attitude is marked by love and compassion. Throughout the Gospels, we see Jesus moved with compassion, whether he’s feeding the hungry, healing the sick, or comforting the brokenhearted. His love wasn’t conditional or reserved for those who thought the same way he did or could give him something in return. Jesus’s love was freely given to all. In our daily lives, we are called to mirror this love—offering grace, kindness, and forgiveness, even when it’s hard or we think someone does not deserve it.Third, a Christ-like attitude is characterized by obedience and surrender to God’s will. Jesus prayed in the Garden of Gethsemane, not my will, but yours be done (Luke 22:42). He was obedient to the point of death on a cross. Similarly, we are called to surrender our desires and plans to God, trusting his ways are higher, and his plans are perfect. This requires a heart that is willing to listen, to be led, and to follow wherever he may guide us.Living with a Christ-like attitude isn’t easy when we operate in the flesh. It requires renewing our heart and mind with God’s Word and prayer, abiding in Jesus, and relying on the Holy Spirit. As we grow in our relationship with God, we display more of his character. We reflect his heart, and our attitudes bring glory to him in everything we do.
Presented by Lisa BishopWe are examining the 5 attitudes for everyday life, and today, let’s talk about the attitude of curiosity.Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you thought you were right about something or someone only to get more information and find out you were dead wrong? I know I have too many times to count.Our brains have a tendency to jump to conclusions rather than asking clarifying questions, and that can cause us to make assumptions. And when we do, it can damage our relationships. If we are not careful our rash reaction can impact our witness as followers of Jesus too.My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires (James 1:19-20).What do these verses have to do with taking on an attitude of curiosity? When we do not heed these wise words and instead find ourselves reacting with certainty rather than pausing and engaging our curiosity we tend to operate from a place of judgment. We come from an “I know I am right” attitude, but the reality is we often do not have the full picture. We have a tendency to presume we know all the facts when in reality we rarely do.When that co-worker, spouse, or friend does or says something and you are convinced you know their motive and intention, rather than presuming to know what is true, get curious!One way to do this is to switch from the mindset of “I bet,” to “I wonder.”Rather than, “I bet my co-worker is withholding information from me,” switch to, “I wonder why I haven’t received an update on that project yet. There must be a variable I am unaware of.”Or move from, “I bet my friend didn’t return my text because she’s not that interested in our friendship,” to “I wonder why my friend hasn’t replied. She must have forgotten or has a lot going on.”Now, it may turn out your co-worker is withholding information, or your friend is distancing herself, but that’s not the point. The point is our assumptions are more often inaccurate, and we all know what assuming can do. It can make us look like a fool. The next time you are quick to judge and jump to conclusions, move from “I bet,” to “I wonder,” believe the best, and see what moving from certainty to curiosity can do.
Presented by Lisa BishopI’m examining the 5 attitudes for everyday life, and today I want to invite you to reflect on this question, “Are you an encourager?”Think about it. The dictionary defines encouragement as words or behavior that give someone the confidence to do something.In other words, when we encourage someone, we give courage to them.I was flying home from a work trip the other day when a text came through right before takeoff. It was from a woman I had not seen or talked to in two years and out of the blue her words of encouragement came through. They brought tears to my eyes and were like water to my soul.Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the body (Proverbs 16:24).When you speak goodhearted words, it breathes life into people. The words you speak can bring healing.A few weeks ago, I was having lunch with a friend, and I started chatting up the young man who was preparing our order. I commented about how much I appreciated his kind disposition. You should have seen the look on his face. He lit up, flashed a huge smile, and then proceeded to tell me I just made his day. I don’t say this to toot my own horn but rather to share an example of how easy it can be to breathe life into people around us every day. How do you use your words to strengthen those around you? Think about people at work. Who can you give sincere words of encouragement to? Simply point out something you appreciate about who they are and the value they bring to the team. Studies show people who feel appreciated at their job have more joy and greater satisfaction.I don’t know why, but we can be so stingy with our words when it doesn’t take much to make a positive impact on someone. I think we can all agree there is a shortage of kindness these days. Whether in the workplace, at home, or at the grocery store, there’s no limit to the love and light of Jesus that we can spread when we use our words to water another person’s soul.As you go about your days, look for ways to breathe life into people with your words. Be an encourager. Say a kind word. You just never know the impact you can have, and what you say may just be the boost someone needs to keep going in their day.
Presented by Lisa BishopWe’re examining the 5 attitudes for everyday life, and today, let’s look at our approachability.How approachable are you? Do people find it easy to interact with you, or are you prickly, perhaps a bit dismissive, distracted, or disengaged?Sometimes we can unintentionally put off an attitude that deters people from wanting to interact with us. Not too long ago, I worked with someone who frequently put off a grumpy vibe. Needless to say, it wasn’t super pleasant to work with him when his attitude was like a big dark rain cloud. As I prepared myself to go to work, I wondered, “Am I going to get the pleasant version or the wet blanket?” His demeanor created an uncomfortable atmosphere of walking on eggshells.Now, we all have bad days, myself included, but if we find ourselves in a pattern of being easily irritated or edgy, we carry an imaginary sign that says do not disturb and disrupt our connection with people. We can damage relationships at home and the office, and our witness as followers of Jesus is hampered.Digital distractions can also compromise our kinship with people. In this age of technology, there are way too many opportunities to check out of conversations and miss truly connecting with people around you. We want to consciously build connections with people, not send mixed signals. This can be particularly challenging when our plates are full, but we never want to be so busy we blow past investing in relationships.When I think about ways of being that communicate approachability, I am reminded of Galatians 5:22-23.The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23).We need to be asking ourselves, “Does my attitude reflect the fruit of my faith?” “Do people feel loved, cared for, and included by me?” “Do I exude joy even in challenging or stress-filled circumstances?” “Am I patient and kind at work even when it’s crunch time?”As followers of Jesus, we have a tremendous opportunity and responsibility to behave in ways becoming of Jesus; ways that put the glory of God on display. Our lives and demeanors are meant to invite people to engage with us, not turn them away. As you go about your day, how can you behave in a way that creates an invitation for connection and gives people the feeling that you are approachable?
Presented by Lisa BishopAre you teachable?We will examine the 5 attitudes for everyday life, and today, let’s look at our teachability.When it comes to having a posture of learning, Proverbs 1:5-7 reminds us of this,Let the wise hear and increase in learning, and the one who understands obtain guidance, to understand a proverb and a saying, the words of the wise and their riddles. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction (Proverbs 1:5-7).These words teach us as followers of Jesus, God’s Word is filled with wisdom and instruction and should always be our go-to and guide. In a broader sense, they also remind us to have a posture of teachability and be open to correction.Sometimes we can become so self-absorbed that our pride, ego, or arrogance can prevent us from inviting instruction, learning from others, seeking out different perspectives, and being open to hearing differing opinions. We can find ourselves so convinced we are right that we are closed off from considering anything out of the scope of what we already know, or think we know.I think it’s interesting that Proverbs is intentional to point out the pursuit of increasing our learning.These words remind us even the wisest of the wise should be open to listening and adding to their knowledge. We never know it all and we should continue to be intentional about seeking opportunities to learn, understand, and expand our insight.If you think about it, these wise words can apply to the workplace, home life, and relationships with friends. When we have an “I already know that” attitude, it does not leave much room for growth and can stunt our relationships.When we are teachable and adopt a learner’s mindset, when we are willing, with wisdom, to invite correction and consider other points of view, we display the godly character of humility.In what circumstances and in which relationships can you take on a posture of listening, openness, and learning this week? When you do, perhaps you will learn something new.
Presented by Lauren StibgenI think most of us have had moments of self-doubt. That moment when you deeply question a decision or words you used in a meeting or in discussion with a friend. Maybe you are left feeling like an imposter. Imposter syndrome is a term that first emerged in the 1970s. Although I noted that both men and women can experience feelings associated with imposter syndrome, the research was rooted in a study of how family patterns contribute to these feelings in women. The researchers, Clance and Imes, found these patterns were born of sibling comparison, and on the opposite end of these women were parents who overly praised accomplishments and supported perfectionist behaviors. Essentially, self-worth is equal to achievement. It didn’t really matter if the self-doubt was caused by comparison or by over attribution of self-worth with achievement. Both instances had the same impact.There are also some innate personality traits that lend to imposter syndrome. These include low self-efficacy: a low sense of your own ability of success, perfectionism: overthinking of a situation or your words, neuroticism: which is linked to higher anxiety, tension, or guilt, and social anxiety: feeling like you don’t belong in a social setting.Feelings of imposter syndrome represent a gap between your own self-perception and the way others perceive you. For example, if someone praises you, you may not believe what they say or feel you have truly earned the merit or the promotion. Playing these feelings on repeat can lead to a pattern of overwork where you feel like you need to become worthy of the role you have, make up for where you feel lacking in intelligence or even hiding from others where you feel most vulnerable.I would argue these feelings of self-doubt have escalated tremendously with the emergence of social platforms which are used to showcase our personal to professional lives. We live in a world of over curation—thinking about how your comments or pictures “fit” into whatever social or professional landscape you may be traversing in. LinkedIn is no longer the digital resume it used to be. It is a platform for thought leadership where algorithms are fed with impressions, likes, and comments! Ted Talks, new book announcements, a conference, a new position, a promotion. Everything is heralded about our professional lives.What about when this imposter syndrome creeps into our faith? Do you show up to Sunday service feeling different than everyone? Maybe you aren’t worshiping like everyone else, or you find it hard to understand the message? You feel like you are on the outside looking in? Or perhaps it is the opposite. You serve on many teams at church. You are part of a women’s small group and a couple's group. You lead student ministry—overdoing it to overcome a feeling that you don’t quite have it all together in your Christian faith…One Google search of imposter syndrome will bring up many articles from top business magazines. In fact, Harvard Business Review published an entire issue of their magazine entitled, “How to Overcome Imposture Syndrome” in May of 2023. There are countless books that offer “letting go” or a “cure” for this group of feelings closely affiliated with work. All of this sounds very exhausting!What I love about God’s Word is that I can always find someone whom God has used for the glory of his kingdom that embodies whatever I see in the world today. This includes imposter syndrome. The innate personality trait of low self-efficacy or the low sense of one’s own ability for success can be seen in the Old Testament story of Moses. In Exodus 2, we learn God has heard the cries of the Israelites in Egypt. God calls to Moses in Exodus 3:4 by name. What happens next is nothing short of something that resonates deeply with me. Moses is called by God to do something and spends a lot of time telling God how he isn’t the man for the job.Exodus 3:10-11, Come,
What do you do with the hurt? It truly is important to be intentional about getting past the hurts of our lives, because when we harbor them, they become destructive forces in our lives, they rob us of joy, and they allow bitterness to take root in our hearts.Let me close with one of my favorite passages from Isaiah 58:6-9.Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke? Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter—when you see the naked, to clothe them, and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood? Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard. Then you will call, and the Lord will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I (Isaiah 58:6-9).Here Isaiah tells us what to do with hurt feelings. He redefines how to respond when you’ve been hurt, when you need healing from the past. You may have some very deep hurt that just doesn’t go away quickly at all; I understand that. But look at what Isaiah tells us.If we pursue this kind of fasting: To help those who are wrongly treated To reach those who are in the bondage of some addiction To share food with hungry people and shelter with the homeless To pay particular attention to those of your own flesh and blood who need helpThen, Isaiah says, your light will break forth and your healing will quickly appear. Letting go of your own hurt and choosing to help others who are hurting is the quickest and best way to find the healing you need, whether it’s a brief hurt you’ve gone through or one that has caused great trauma for a long time. This is God’s cure for hurt feelings, for the emotional pain you may have endured or still are enduring. Claim it for yourself, so your light will break forth and your healing will quickly appear.
I am examining what you can do when you’ve been hurt—how to deal with the pain that remains. Yesterday I pointed out the hurt we feel resides in our minds, in our thought patterns. Therefore, to be free from hurt, you must change your thoughts. The Bible says we must bring our thoughts into captivity and make them obedient to Christ, and that’s exactly what you have to do with the hurt—you drive it from your thoughts by replacing it with good thoughts, positive thoughts, thoughts filled with the love God has for you.Then you need to confess whatever responsibility you may have in the hurt. While you may not have had the same amount of responsibility, there may have been a part you played which contributed to the hurt. If so, get it out, confess it, and acknowledge it to yourself and to God. Covering it up or denying it will just allow it to stay alive within you and continue to cause you great harm.It’s important to get beyond seeing yourself as a victim. Have you become addicted to your pity parties? Believe me, that can happen. It’s that feeling of “it’s me against the world,” and I have a right to be hurt! Of course, your hurt feelings matter, and I don’t mean to make light of the hurt you’ve experienced. But when you allow your feelings to override all else and control you, you put yourself in the victim seat and that is a terrible place to be.You have choices every day to choose how you’re going to feel. Paul wrote to the Philippians they should rejoice in the Lord always, and again I say, rejoice. It’s a choice you can make, and the good news is, as a believer in Jesus Christ, you have power far above your own to give you the victory in this battle. With prayer and trusting in the Lord, you can get out of that miserable victim’s seat.I’ve discovered another very important thing to do to put hurt behind me is simply to get busy doing something constructive. This is one time you need to get involved in constructive activity that will take your mind off your hurt feelings and shut down that pity party. A friend of mine tells me her great-grandmother would frequently say to her, “If you have time to feel sorry for yourself, then you don’t have enough chores to do.” As she puts it, “It is more difficult to ‘wear your feelings on your shirt sleeve’ when you’re ‘rolling up your shirt sleeves’ and serving others.”
Have you been hurt lately? Most of us can recall some fairly recent hurt feelings, can’t we? So, what do we do with the hurt? That’s what I’ve been talking about this week. All-too-often we wallow in the hurt, remembering and retelling it, and that just allows the hurt to grow.A friend of mine wrote this in an article on hurt feelings:“When you’re hurt, do you listen well to the Holy Spirit? Or are you so busy talking about your hurt he doesn’t have a chance to get a word in edgewise. Without a supernatural, God-response to hurt, we often wallow in self-pity and embroider around the injustice, especially to our friends or family who will listen. Repeatedly talking about hurt only confirms, convinces, consumes and sets the offense in concrete. In fact, injustice, like a fishing story, always becomes larger in the retelling.”Think about this: The hurt exists in your mind, in your thoughts. It’s all about what you’re thinking about. The hurt continues to be painful because you continue to think about it. If you can learn to bring those hurtful thoughts into captivity and make them obedient to Christ, as we are admonished to do in 2 Corinthians 10:5, then you will begin to find freedom from the hurt.Philippians 4:8 tells us to think of things that are a good report. Usually when our feelings have been hurt, we are thinking about some bad report. It has helped me greatly to tell myself over and over again, when I'm tempted to dwell on some hurt, "Mary, stop thinking about the bad reports. Think about some good reports.” Think of something good that happened recently. Think of someone who loves you. Think of the wonderful truth that as a Christ-follower, you are loved by Jesus Christ, and nothing can separate you from his love.If you want to get rid of the hurt, the first thing you have to do is to make the decision to let it go. And that means, you must carefully guard your thought life and refuse to let your thoughts go to that hurtful place. When you begin to dwell on the hurt, talk out loud to yourself and say, “Stop it. I’m not going there today. I choose to dwell on some good reports.” Let me assure you that you can change your thought patterns, by God’s grace and with his help, if you truly determine to do it.
What do you do with the hurt? I don’t have to tell you life is full of hurt. But it’s what you do with the hurt that will determine if it overcomes you or you have victory over the hurt.Years ago, God began to reveal to me how hooked I was on pity parties. That was my way of dealing with hurt—I just indulged in lots of self-pity. And what came as a major revelation to me was realizing God sees it as a sin. Whether or not I have a legitimate complaint, wallowing in self-pity, nurturing my hurt feelings was not what a mature Christian should do. I wanted to grow up in Christ, to become more like Jesus, and I began to see how wrong and silly it was for me to insist on my pity parties.I well remember the night I came home from work with my feelings hurt—again—by my insensitive boss. I was nurturing those hurt feelings by going over in my mind his hurtful words, what I wished I had said to him, what I would say to him someday, how unfair he was, ad infinitum. Instead of doing something productive, I plopped down to waste an evening by throwing another pity party. Pity parties are indeed pitiful since no one ever comes, and there is nothing to celebrate.As I began to indulge myself by feeling sorry for myself, I stopped and thought, I don’t want to feel sorry for myself. I don’t want to be miserable. I will not throw a pity party tonight. And with that I got busy, put those hurt feelings behind me, and got over it! It was a major turning point for me, as I began to learn I didn’t have to hold onto those hurt feelings. I could, by a set of my will with the power of God’s Spirit, get over it.See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many (Hebrews 12:15).Hurt feelings turn into bitter roots, and those bitter roots grow up to cause trouble.If you don’t determine to let go of the hurt, it will quickly turn into bitterness, and that is one of the most destructive forces in the world. It causes trouble and defiles many, as the writer to the Hebrews tells us. Then the hurt starts to poison everyone around you, as it spills over to others in your life. The good news is you can let go of the hurt by God’s grace. It is possible to live free from the hurts you are harboring.
My topic this week is: what do you do with the hurt? None of us escape some kind of emotional pain—some hurt—and whether it’s a slight offense or some deep, ingrained trauma you’ve experienced, you have to decide what you’re going to do with that hurt. That’s the most important issue because it determines whether you’re going to let it harm you endlessly or you’re going to put it behind you somehow and move on.What is the most common way people deal with hurt? Don’t you think the most common way is to harbor it, to blame others, to relive it time and again. It can become so all-consuming your hurt begins to define who you are. I remember a person I knew many years ago who chose to see herself as the person who had been wronged by everyone in her life. Her hurt became her identity, and in her mind, she always saw herself as a victim. That was who she was—and you didn’t have to be around her long before she communicated that in some way or another. She made herself a victim of everyone in her life, even those who were genuinely trying to help her.Now, who lost in that situation? She did, of course. She continued to heap all kinds of hurt on herself, to exaggerate the hurt she had experienced, and to live in sadness and pain because she chose to harbor the hurt. Could it be that you have done something similar?Why do we hang on to hurt feelings so long, thereby heaping unhappiness on our own heads? We certainly don’t get any revenge on our offenders by hanging on to hurt feelings. If you think a pity party will relieve some of your hurt, think again! Pity parties are addictive, as well as pitiful! The more you feel sorry for yourself, the more you will try to find comfort in your self-pity. It can be a vicious cycle, and, of course, it only makes matters worse.I want to encourage you today to think about what you do with your hurt. Psalm 22:24 is a verse to hang on to.For he has not despised or scorned the suffering of the afflicted one; he has not hidden his face from him but has listened to his cry for help (Psalm 22:24).Our Lord sympathizes with your hurt, and he has not and will not walk away.
Do you believe God uses your everyday work to accomplish his redemptive Kingdom purposes in the world. I’m Lisa Bishop with The Christian Working Woman, and this is exactly what our friends at Faith and Work Chicago believe. This week, I’m excited to share a conversation with Malissa Mackey who serves as the director of Faith and Work Chicago. So join us as we reimagine daily discipleship through our everyday work.
If you went to a doctor today and he told you something you are doing is going to shorten your life and cause you great physical harm, would you not be willing to listen to his advice and abandon that destructive behavior? I've been examining self-inflicted suffering. We've seen how bitterness, self-pity, lack of discipline, and negativity are always self-inflicted and cause us great harm.Why do we so often do things that inflict great suffering on ourselves as well as on others? I think, first, because we often aren't aware of what's happening. We allow ourselves to be drawn into these destructive behaviors before we realize where we're heading. Therefore, we need to pray for awareness and discernment.Sometimes we choose to continue in our destructive behavior because we feel we have a right—a right to be bitter, or lazy, or negative, a right to have a pity party. Just ask yourself: "Isn't life tough enough without making your own life tougher?”When I find myself embroiled in this kind of self-destructive behavior, I try to catch myself, stop, and ask: "Why are you thinking of wrongs done to you? Why are you feeling sorry for yourself? Why are you focusing on negative things? Why are you refusing to be disciplined? Don't you realize what this is doing to you?” If you and I can just catch ourselves in this self-destructive behavior, we will make our own lives so much more pleasant and productive.But a much higher motivation, and one that is far more important, is our privilege to be ambassadors for Jesus Christ in our world. When we get rid of these self-inflicted sufferings, we are freed up to be more like Jesus, more pleasing to him, a brighter light in a dark world.Someday we'll stand before Jesus to give an account for how we lived our life here on earth. I don't want to hear that my life was not as effective as it could have been because I insisted on feeling sorry for myself, or being bitter, or being undisciplined, or staying negative. Remember, you can get rid of any of these any time you're willing to let God empower you to do what you need to do.
You know, we've all got enough troubles in this world without inflicting more on ourselves unnecessarily. Obviously, the smart thing for any of us to do is to get rid of those self-inflicted sufferings.Bitterness, self-pity and lack of discipline are the three we've discussed already this week. How about being negative? That's about as harmful as anything I can think of. Are you a negative person? Do you gripe and complain frequently? Do you tend to look on the dark side all the time? Do you focus on people's faults rather than their good points? How much of your speech is in negative territory? What about your thought life?I sure wish someone had warned me about negativity earlier in my life. Perhaps I just didn't listen, but I now certainly recognize how important it is not to dwell in negativity. It is self-inflicted suffering.Every time you focus on the bad things—whether it's the weather or a friend's faults or your sore throat or your workload—then you immediately add a lot of stress to your life. In addition, negativity slows you down because it wastes your energy. Your negativity harms others as well. You drag others down with you, and you drive people away.Here's the cure for negativity: thankfulness. Paul wrote to the Colossians:So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live in him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness (Colossians 2:6-7).Frequently I say to myself: "Mary, overflow with thankfulness today.” I can choose to overflow with thankfulness, or I can choose to be negative. Being negative is self-inflicted suffering. Check it out; you may not realize just how often you slide into negative territory. If you'll be more positive, you'll discover enormous benefits and great relief from that self-inflicted suffering.
Self-inflicted suffering—got any of that going on in your life right now? I’m examining things we do to make our own lives much more difficult and miserable. For example, we've seen how bitterness and self-pity are always self-inflicted, and are they ever miserable. But you can stop being bitter and shut down your pity parties any time you choose to.Another suffering we inflict on ourselves is lack of discipline. Discipline does not come easy for me. I don't think discipline is much fun, to tell you the truth. And it would be very easy for me to be an undisciplined person.But what I've learned—and am learning—is discipline is the necessary path to success and achievement. It is essential for turning dreams into realities and visions into accomplishments. But if you're not willing to put needed disciplines into your life, you are inflicting some costly suffering on yourself.For example, without being disciplined in your eating habits and exercise, you are not going to live as long, not going to have as much energy, and are much more likely to catch diseases and be ill.Poor work habits are another example. When people are habitually late for work, fail to follow-through, aren't dependable, and do their work in a sloppy manner, it's because they are undisciplined. And that leads to lost opportunities, lost pay increases, maybe even lost jobs! All self-inflicted from poor discipline in key areas.There are many other examples I could cite but the question is, how do you become more disciplined? I would encourage you to find ways to impose discipline in your life. What works for you? For me, I use gimmicks and journals and time management techniques and reminders and self-rewards—all kinds of things to help me be the disciplined person I know I must be to accomplish what I want to accomplish.Choose one area where your discipline is weak and pray about it every day. Ask God to strengthen you for discipline in that area. Then look for accountability and gimmicks to help you impose discipline in that area. Work on one area at a time, because when you are successful there, it will encourage you to be successful in other areas. Proverbs says we can die from lack of discipline.
Most of us have enough respect for our bodies not to beat our heads against brick walls, right? And yet we may be inflicting suffering on ourselves in other ways that are even more harmful and foolish.Yesterday we saw how bitterness is always self-inflicted suffering. The second one is self-pity. Have you had any pity parties lately? I've come to the conclusion that pity parties are pitiful! Why?First, because almost always, pity parties cause you to waste time. I remember a time long ago when someone had hurt my feelings, and so I thought, "I'm not going to do anything tonight; I have a right to just do nothing and feel sorry for myself.” Then it dawned on me the enemy was trying to hinder me by tempting me to throw a pity party. That’s when I began to realize how pitiful pity parties are.Not only do pity parties waste your time, but they also waste your energy. Self-pity drains you. You spend a lot of emotional energy when you are feeling sorry for yourself. That means you don't have energy for other things that are important.Another result of self-pity is it affects your performance. You slow down, you lose motivation, you do your work halfheartedly—or, maybe you just quit!If you're tired of the self-inflicted suffering of pity parties, here are some suggestions:Change your attitude about pity parties.Ask God to give you holy anger about pity parties, to see them as he sees them, and to get sick and tired of feeling sorry for yourself.Refuse to think about the bad reports!In Philippians 4:8 we are told to think about things that are of a good report. Usually, when we are having a pity party, we are thinking about some bad report. It has helped me greatly to tell myself, "Mary, stop thinking about the bad reports. Think about some good reports.”Think about Jesus and all he endured.Hebrews 12:2 says let us fix our eyes on Jesus… By a set of your will, stop thinking about poor me, and think about Jesus—fix your eyes on him. Think about how he suffered for you, and you will be embarrassed to feel sorry for yourself.
Did you ever see someone literally bang his or her head against a brick wall? We use that phrase a lot, but I've never seen anyone purposely do it, have you? If I did, I'd probably think that person was mentally ill. That's not normal behavior, to inflict physical suffering on your own body. Yet, how often we inflict other kinds of suffering on ourselves—self-inflicted suffering that is unnecessary and does us a great deal of damage.Bitterness would have to be at the top of that list of self-inflicted suffering. Bitterness is the result of keeping a record of wrongs done against us. It comes from refusing to forgive. It happens when we continually re-live how our feelings were hurt, how our pride was damaged, how our toes were stepped on.What I've discovered is when we harbor feelings of bitterness, the wrong done against us grows in our minds. It becomes greatly exaggerated until we lose our perspective, and it seems much worse than it really is.Let me tell you the consequences of bitterness. First, it changes your physical appearance and not for the better. A bitter person ages quickly, looks tired and haggard and unattractive. I don't care how well you dress or how much makeup you wear, bitterness cannot be camouflaged. It makes you look ugly.Second, bitterness ruins relationships. No one really wants to be with a bitter person, because they get tired of hearing their sad story all the time. Bitter people are so focused on the wrong done to them they tend to talk about it a lot. And, if you've noticed, that just drives people away in droves.Third, bitterness shortens your life because it adds extraordinary amounts of stress and fatigue. It is one of your major energy leaks; it just keeps you exhausted.Bitterness is self-inflicted suffering. That means anytime you decide to, you can stop suffering from bitterness. Forgiveness is your choice; forsaking your anger is your choice. Tearing up that list of wrongs done to you is your choice. Nobody can force you to be bitter if you don't want to be. I don't care how justified you may be in feeling bitter, all it does is destroy you.Will you stop beating your head against that wall of bitterness today? It's self-inflicted suffering. Remember, you can choose to let go of the bitterness right now, by God's grace.
You know, most of us spend way too much time in the offended seat, because we allow our feelings to be hurt so easily. We start throwing pity parties, and we get stuck in that seat. Quite honestly, I’m really sick of sitting in this seat. It has taken me awhile to realize I sit in the offended seat more than I should, but I’ve finally gotten really sick of it. And it is like being let out of prison, set free from bondage, when you see how miserable it is to be the offended person and to wallow around in self-pity.If you spend a lot of time in this seat of the offended, with your feelings hurt, and throwing your own pity parties, you probably think someone else has the responsibility to get you out of that seat. You’re thinking the person who hurt you, who offended you, should now come and do whatever is necessary to get you out of there. After all, it’s not your fault if you’re in the seat of the offender, you think, so it’s not your responsibility to get yourself out of it!But I hope you will hear this clearly: If you are in the offended seat, it is because you are choosing to sit there. And believe it or not, there is nothing anyone in the seat of the offender can do to get you out of the seat of the offended. You will only get out of that seat when you decide you’ve had enough, when you see how wrong and sinful it is, and how self-destructive it is.The person who offended you should apologize, especially if it was intentional. I get that. But they may never be able to apologize enough or in an acceptable way to you if you are really stuck in the seat of the offended. And of course, many times the one who offended doesn’t apologize, either because they don’t know they have offended you or they don’t care. So, if you’re waiting for the offender to extricate you from that miserable seat of the offended, you’re in for a huge disappointment.In fact, there are people in the seat of the offended who enjoy being there, in a rather perverse way. They enjoy being a victim. After all, as long as you’re in the seat of the offended, you don’t have to take responsibility for anything you did in the seat of the offender. You can just keep shifting blame and having your pity parties—and spend your life in the offended seat.I must tell you when you choose to keep sitting in the seat of the offended, it turns you into someone who is sour, unattractive, self-consumed, and dishonoring to Christ. Now, I know some of you have been hurt very deeply; the offense against you is deep and ingrained. Even so, God wants to deliver you from being the offended person, carrying that burden around with you all the time, wearing that chip on your shoulder. But you must be willing to give it up.What does God say we should do when we’ve been offended?Romans 12:14: Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse.We are to bless them, not slander them. Regardless of what they did to you, it pales in comparison to what your sin—and mine—did to the Son of God. Do you remember Jesus’ words on the cross—Father, forgive them? He blessed those who persecuted him. He gave us the model for how we are to treat those who hurt us.Have you blessed people in the offender seat of your life? I mean literally prayed a blessing on them—asked God to bless them. That’s one way to get you out of the offended seat.Proverbs has some very wise advice for those who have been offended.Proverbs 19:11: A man’s wisdom gives him patience; it is to his glory to overlook an offense.If you find yourself suddenly in the seat of the offended—someone has said something to hurt your feelings or done something that injured you—can you, by God’s grace and through the power of the Holy Spirit, give up your right to feel hurt and actually choose to overlook the offense? Now, I know some offenses should not be overlooked, but certainly with those small things that often put us in the seat of the offended, we can learn to overlook them,
Presented by Lauren StibgenWhen jealousy gets to have a stronghold in your life, it can be sinful. We have seen jealousy of undeserved compassion, coveting possessions and celebrations, and the envy of someone’s perceived advantage. Today, we will consider the jealousy of exaltation or fame.Have you ever felt a twang of jealousy when someone receives a compliment? It could be something small like a passing great job, or something bigger like a crowd cheering for someone else’s accomplishments.In the Old Testament, Saul burned with jealousy over David. In 1 Samuel 10-31 you can read the entire saga between Saul and David. But, if you recall, the Lord had given Saul as a king to the people. God blessed Saul with much success in battle, and filled with pride, he sets up a monument for himself. Saul loved being recognized, and he loved the power of being King. God regreted appointing Saul king and sent Samuel to anoint a new king.When David was anointed, we are told he had beautiful eyes and was handsome. David didn’t become king immediately. In fact, we aren’t even told David knew he was to become the king. He served Saul by playing the lyre to calm him and carried on as a shepherd. Eventually we know David defeated Goliath. This is where the jealousy ensues. You see, the women of Israel had celebrated Saul in his battle victories, but now they celebrated David. Saul struck down thousands and David his ten thousands.Saul was very angry; this refrain displeased him greatly. “They have credited David with tens of thousands,” he thought, “but me with only thousands. What more can he get but the kingdom?” And from that time on Saul kept a close eye on David (1 Samuel 18:8-9).Saul was jealous of David’s success, and the fame he received from his success—so much so the remainder of the book of 1 Samuel tells of Saul’s plots to kill David.When jealousy over someone’s success at work stirs you to tear them down, you really have a problem. Maybe you start gossiping to highlight things that make the other person look bad. Worse, maybe this a person who works for you, and you aim to get them fired because they take the spotlight off you as a leader.Maybe you aren’t Saul in this story, but you are David. I know I have been in this position professionally, and it has drawn me closer to God.First, if you feel jealousy rising up, find someone to talk with about these feelings and confess them to God. If you are on the other side of someone’s jealousy, pray. But also do something practical and document your accomplishments well.
Presented by Lauren StibgenWhether at work or at home, we can all experience the feeling of working harder than someone else. We are examining the hard feelings of jealousy. We have seen how jealousy can truly be rooted in envy, and in this case, it is envy about the perceived advantage someone may have when they don’t work as hard as we do.For some of us this could have started back in school. Were you the one who studied and toiled on papers only to get a C while another student in class never touched a book and magically got an A? While they were off having a great time, you were stuck at the library with your nose in your books!Fast forward, you are working on a project team. This time, it isn’t about working for a grade but to get an important project done. One of your colleagues spends all her time in the boss’s office, talking about the project deliverables, but doesn’t do any of the work. When the project is complete, she receives equal accolades for the project’s success. You are quick to schedule a meeting to tell your boss about what she didn’t do because you are jealous of the advantage she had receiving credit and not pulling her weight. To your surprise, your boss doesn’t feel this way. In fact, she tells you how much she appreciated your colleague keeping her posted about the project.This scenario is not unlike my two favorite sisters in the New Testament, Mary and Martha. In Luke 10:38-42 we learn that Jesus goes to their house to spend time with his disciples and teach. While Martha toiled and served, Mary sat at Jesus feet to listen to his teaching. Frustrated because her sister is not working to serve alongside her, she goes to Jesus asking him to get her sister to work. If you know this story, you know Jesus says Martha is anxious and troubled about many things. She was jealous of the position Mary took at the feet of Jesus.God doesn’t want us to compare our work to the work of others. When we fall into this comparison, it can lead to feelings of jealousy. And, as we have seen, jealousy can lead to even deeper feelings rooted in sin. Focus on doing your very best. I find when I think about what someone else is or isn’t doing it takes my eye off doing my very best.
Presented by Lauren StibgenOne of the definitions of jealousy is being protective of one’s possessions or envy. This protection over our possessions or being envious of someone else’s possessions can quickly lead us to breaking one of God’s commandments. Exodus 20:17 tells us, thou shall not covet.Coveting is an unlawful desire to have something that doesn’t belong to you. At the root of jealous envy can be covetousness.The Parable of the Prodigal Son in Luke 15:11-32 shows the jealousy of one brother toward the undeserved compassion and celebration of his brother who had taken his inheritance and gone away to lead a sinful life.I think we can all picture these hard feelings. Someone you know is given a lot—maybe what they are owed. You continue to work hard and show diligence but never ask for more. Then, this other person comes back, having wasted all of what they had, and they are given more. Plus, everyone is excited to see them! Wait, what? Hello? What about me? I have been here all along with no fanfare, or celebration. Why are we celebrating this person?In the parable of the prodigal son, we see again how the perception of another being undeserving caused deep jealousy when he was celebrated. We were told the prodigal son had already taken his inheritance, which meant when he returned, a portion of what he was given probably belonged to the brother who was working hard and being obedient. The hardworking brother was coveting what his prodigal brother was being given both in the attention he received and in the things he was being given. He was jealous, and even angry.Jesus tells us watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; life does not consist in an abundance of possessions (Luke 12:15).What are you coveting that shows up as jealousy? Are you desiring a possession that is not yours? Seeking celebration and attention because someone else has received it?A desire to have abundance and to be celebrated is not wrong. In fact, God wants this for us! God celebrates us! In Zephaniah 3:17 we are told he rejoices over us with gladness and exults over us with loud singing!It is wrong when this desire for abundance and celebration is born of coveting what someone else has.
Presented by Lauren StibgenWhy are they being forgiven? They really messed up! Have you ever been jealous when someone has received what seems like undeserved compassion? Perhaps the scales seemed to tip in someone’s favor that you felt wasn’t deserving of that second chance at work. Or maybe you are friends with a group at work that has welcomed someone into the group who had previously gossiped about people in the office, and you are aggravated.Jonah was so jealous of what he felt was God’s undeserved compassion on Nineveh that he fled from God’s command! God calls to Jonah to go to Nineveh to call them out for their evil (Jonah 1:2). You know how this story goes, Jonah was so against this he got himself a ticket on a ship going the opposite direction, disobeyed God, made God angry, was thrown overboard, and was swallowed up by a giant fish. Jonah spent three days in the belly of the fish praying to God for mercy. The fish spit him out, and he begrudgingly went on his way to Nineveh where God called him in the first place. He carried out the calling from God, and the people of Nineveh repented.When God saw what they did and how they turned from their evil ways, he relented and did not bring on them the destruction he had threatened (Jonah 3:10).Jonah was angry God showed what he felt was undeserved compassion on the people of Nineveh. One could say he had jealous envy of God’s compassion.If you know this story, you know this is a very short paraphrase, and when I look at this story, I am struck at how Jonah missed the compassion God showed to him in his disobedience. God kept him safe in the belly of a fish, gave him a second chance, and at the end of the story even gave Jonah shade from a plant as he sulked in his envy. He completely missed God’s compassion for him!Have you found yourself jealous of God’s compassion on someone else? You might consider spending time reflecting on God’s undeserved compassion on you. I know this helps soften my heart when I feel someone else may not be deserving.
Presented by Lauren StibgenDo you struggle with jealousy? This hard feeling is a state of showing envy of someone and their achievements or advantages, being suspicious of someone’s unfaithfulness in a relationship, or being protective over one’s possessions. Most of all, this hard feeling can be sinful when it becomes a stronghold in your life.We will look at different ways jealousy can manifest at work, but today let’s consider the righteous jealousy of God. When is God jealous? Certainly, he isn’t envying our achievements, but God is jealous in our unfaithful to our relationship with him and in his mighty protection over us as his greatest possession.You shall have no other Gods before me. You shall not make for yourself an image…You shall not bow down to them or worship them, for I the Lord your God am a jealous God… (Exodus 20:3-5).It is clear—God commands our faithfulness to him. He does not want us serving idols, and even tells us he is jealous. The idols we have today are different than the carved images in the Old Testament, but we can consider an idol today anything that takes us away from God. What are you putting before God? Is it work, maybe sports or a hobby? Anything that keeps you from putting God first will make him jealous.We are God’s greatest possession. The Lord has chosen you to be his treasured possession (Deuteronomy 14:2). While this was directed toward Israel, we also see in 1 Peter 2:9, God calls us a people for his own possession. Treasured and his own. Why are we so important to God?Genesis 1:27 tells us God made us in his own image—Imago Dei. He made us for himself. He does not wish any of us should perish but that all should reach repentance (2 Peter 3:9).God made us in his image, for himself. His great love for us as his treasured possession is so richly shown in John 3:16.For God so loved the world that he gave his only son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life (John 3:16).After years of jealousy that turned to righteous anger at Israel, God gave us Jesus.With our definition of jealousy, we must ask ourselves if we are making God jealous. Certainly, we know God hates our sin, and the sins of the world. He hates them so much he offered the ultimate sacrifice for our sins—his only son.The only good jealousy is a jealous God. He is sovereign over all things, especially his treasured possessions.
All of us have been in both of those seats; we have offended others, sometimes intentionally, sometimes not, and we have certainly been offended. But neither place is a good place to be; a mature Christian who desires to grow up in Christ doesn’t want to spend any time in either place—either as the offended or the offender.This episode and next, I’m going to describe what happens to us when we occupy either of these seats—the seat of the offender or the offended. And then we prepared a special handout to help you stay out of both! You’ll find it on our website at christianworkingwoman.org.Let’s look at the seat of the offender. Offending others can either be intentional or unintentional. We must recognize both—those times when we really want to hurt someone, and those times when we have hurt someone without even realizing it.First, what would cause us to intentionally try to hurt someone? The first thing that comes to my mind is that we strike back at someone who has hurt us. We’ve been hurt, so we hurt back. This comes in big ways and small ways. For example, someone may have said one sentence to you today that hurt your feelings, and before you know it, you reacted with a stinger of your own. Or someone may have passed you by without saying hello or treated you in what seemed like a rude way, and so the next chance you get, you respond to them in a similar fashion.Those are small offenses that generate other small offenses. And whether the first offense was intentional, we respond in an intentionally offensive way because we assume it was intentional! Does this not ring a bell with you? You’ve seen it happen at work, at home, at church, in families, with friends and strangers, and no doubt you’ve sat in the seat of the offended in response to small offenses. The thing is, these small offenses can easily escalate to a long-term, hurtful cycle of offenses each person inflicts on the other.There are many marriages, as well as other close relationships, that have been in a cycle like this for years, where one small offense generates another in return, and that has become the norm for that relationship—each person offends because she or he is offended, and on it goes. What is needed is for one person in that relationship to be willing to break the cycle. This is why Jesus said, “If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. And if someone wants to sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. If someone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles” (Matthew 5:39 – 41).Jesus is not advocating we become floor mats for people to run over, but he is saying if you will be willing to break the cycle, to be the one who refuses to return an offense for an offense, you can stop this hurtful cycle and you can find healing in the relationship. But someone has to decide to get out of the seat of the offender and not return evil for evil.Some married friends of mine say they have learned to give each other the benefit of the doubt. In other words, if one of them is offended by the other, before they assume that the other meant to offend them, they give them the benefit of the doubt by assuming they did not mean to offend, since they both have promised not to intentionally offend each other. I like that. That will break the cycle of offense before it gets started.If you are in the offender’s seat, I want to encourage you—to urge you—to decide to get out of it right now, today. It’s really a miserable place to be.But I think it is often true when we do offend someone, it is unintentional. We don’t stop to realize how words, attitudes, body language, and facial expressions—and all kinds of little things—can become offensive. We truly underestimate how easily we can cause hurt. Aren’t you usually shocked when you find out someone is offended with something you said or did?I was shocked some time ago when a person I counted as a good friend began to strike out ...
If you've been with me this week you've met the Tator family: the father, Dick Tator, his wife, Emmy Tator, their daughter Hessie, and their son, Aggie Tator. We can learn a lot from the Tator family. There's one more member of this unique family that I'd like you to get to know. It's Grandpa Spec Tator.Now, everybody loves Grandpa Spec; he's a comfortable, likeable person. But all his life he's been one of those people who watches what everyone else is doing, criticizes them when they make a mistake, comments freely on their performance, but never ever gets involved. Spec Tator is always on the sidelines, telling everybody else how it ought to be done, but never doing it.Someone has said the church today is much like a football game. The majority of the people are watching a small minority perform. And those watching desperately need exercise, while those performing desperately need rest.You know, there are an awful lot of people like Grandpa Spec Tator around today. They stay in the bleachers, yelling at everyone else, but never getting involved in the fight. The 80/20 factor is a well-known measure in the business world. We usually get 80% of our business from 20% of our customers and 80% of our problems from 20% of our customers. Unfortunately, so often the body of Christ has that same problem. So much of the work is done by so few.How wonderful it would be if the Spec Tators of the world would join in and pull their share of the weight. I've noticed the Spec Tators are the first to criticize, the first to find fault. A person who is involved in the performing and doing is much more understanding and tolerant than those who simply stand on the sidelines and watch.Well, they're quite a family, this Tator family: Dick, Emmy, Hessie, Aggie and Spec Tator. If you run into them somewhere along the way, perhaps you'll remember what I've said about them. Or maybe it'll cause you to ask yourself if any of these Tators has gotten into your family—into your life.
I've been introducing to you the members of the Tator family. You may have met them before, but in case you haven't, I wanted you to get to know them. We met the mother and father, Dick Tator and Emmy Tator. Yesterday we got to know their daughter, Hessie Tator.Today I'd like to introduce their son, Aggie Tator. Now, I know we generally think of boys as being full of mischief, but Aggie's problem is much more than the normal boyish spirit. Aggie is really a troublemaker. He literally looks for ways to cause discord and disrupt the family unity.Have you ever known someone like Aggie Tator? They use words as instruments of pain, to hurt people. They say things that cause suspicions to arise in the other person's mind. Sometimes it's the smallest little seed of discord they sow, but it leads to much trouble when it takes root and grows.In Proverbs 6:19, we read one of the seven things that are detestable to the Lord is a person who stirs up dissension among brothers. I'm afraid that's Aggie Tator—stirring up dissension wherever he can.Have you ever wondered why Aggie Tator is so intent on causing problems? Proverbs 29:22 gives us a clue.An angry person stirs up conflict, and a hot-tempered person commits many sins (Proverbs 29:22).Anger that is not dealt with properly will explode on you in ways that are out of control and totally inappropriate. I think that happens with Aggie Tator. He's got anger inside him which he's never dealt with, and that anger has grown into bitterness, which displays itself by causing trouble for others.If only Aggie could turn to the Lord with his anger and give his bitterness over to the Lord. He'd find healing for those wounds and release from all that anger. He'd find his hot temper could be controlled by God's Spirit, and as a result he wouldn't be causing all those problems all the time. You have to feel sorry for Aggie Tator; he makes his own life miserable as well as everyone else's.
Have you ever met the Tator family? I have a feeling you may have met some of them before. Monday, we got to know the father in this family, Dick Tator, and yesterday, his wife, Emmy Tator. Today, I'd like you to meet their daughter, Hessie Tator.Now, I'm quite certain you'd like Hessie all right; she's a pleasant enough person. But Hessie has a real problem. You see, she just can't seem to get going on anything. She has lots of plans and ideas, but nothing ever seems to happen as a result of her planning.I've noticed procrastination is one of her biggest obstacles. She just keeps putting things off. Her intentions are terrific, but the follow-through breaks down very often.Perhaps Hessie needs to remember what Jesus said to his disciples: Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them (John 13:17). Blessing comes in doing, but Hessie can't seem to get to the "doing" stage, so she keeps missing the blessing.Jesus' life on earth confirms he didn't procrastinate. When he said he would travel to Jerusalem, he did so, even when he knew the cross awaited him there. What he promised, he fulfilled in every instance. Jesus was a doer, and Hessie Tator needs to allow Christ to live that unhesitating life through her.I wonder if Hessie Tator has ever considered the parable Jesus told in Luke 6 about the one who hears the truth but does not act accordingly. Jesus said that person is like one who builds a house on the sand, and as soon as the storms come, the house collapses and is ruined because the foundation is not firm. When a person is a hearer but not a doer, they are inviting disaster into their lives and denying the blessings God has in store for them. Remember, the blessing is in doing, not in knowing.Oh, I think sometimes Hessie Tator puts things off because she's afraid of failure. You know, whenever you do anything, you do run the risk of failing, but if that fear controls you, you'll simply never do anything. And besides, no one ever succeeded without many failures along the way. Failure is part of the process.
This week I'm introducing you—again—to the Tator family. If you've never met them before, you'll want to get to know them. Most of us can learn a lot from the Tators. Yesterday, we met the father of this family, Dick Tator.Today I'd like to introduce you to the mother of the Tator family, Emmy Tator. Now, Emmy is a nice lady, but to tell you the truth, she spends most of her time worrying about what other people think of her, trying to be like everyone else, trying to find acceptance by going along with the crowd. Have you ever met Emmy?Emmy Tator is sometimes obsessed and addicted to her need for people's approval. She is often unhappy with herself and appears to be very frustrated at times. That's because she's trying to please everyone else and be like everyone else.Now, I certainly wouldn't want Emmy to purposely set out to be different just for the sake of being different. But it's really important for her to realize there's no way in this world she'll ever please everybody. That's been a tough lesson for me to learn. I seem to think if I just try hard enough, surely everybody will like me and approve of me. But it never works. You truly cannot please all people.Emmy Tator needs to realize she is an original, created by God to be unique, and she doesn't need to pattern herself after others. Emmy needs to be reminded when she compares herself to others and tries to be like them, she is in effect saying God has made a mistake in the way he made her, and she could have done a better job than God in his design. Instead of accepting who she is in Christ, she keeps trying to be someone else. Poor Emmy Tator. That's a frustrating way to live.
I want to introduce you to a family I think you need to get to know. They're the Tator family, and every few years I re-introduce them to you, because you seem to enjoy them so much. And I think we can learn some things from the members of this Tator family.The first Tator I'd like you to meet is the father of this family, Dick Tator. I'd have to say Dick Tator is not a very teachable person. Dick finds it difficult to admit he's wrong about anything, and I've noticed he always must have things done his way.Have you run into Dick Tator somewhere along the way? I wish I could sit down with Dick and share a few verses with him from God's Word. Proverbs 19:20 would be appropriate for Dick.Listen to advice and accept discipline and at the end you will be counted among the wise (Proverbs 19:20).Dick finds it very difficult to listen to others and as a result, he does things his way, and frankly, his way is not always the best. He'd be real smart to learn to listen to others and take advice. Proverbs 15:22 could help Dick understand why his ideas frequently fall flat on their face.Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed (Proverbs 15:22).I sure wish Dick Tator could learn to ask others for their counsel and advice. He'd be much more successful.Another problem Dick Tator has is he always wants to be the one up front, in control, telling everyone else what to do. Now, it's true we need leaders; people who can and will take charge and get the ball rolling. But Dick needs to learn about servant leadership. That's the best way to lead.Jesus told us ...whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave—just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many (Matthew 20:26-28).I don't think Dick Tator has ever stopped to understand what Jesus was teaching us. Before you can tell other people what to do, you have to do it yourself. You lead best by getting out in front and doing the job; then others can follow your example.Lots of people are like Dick Tator; they want the glory of giving orders but aren't willing to be the servant of those they want to lead. That's the mark of a great leader. Dick Tator needs to learn servant leadership.
Presented by Lauren StibgenOftentimes we can get our identity wrapped up in different aspects of our life. It could be a hobby or a talent, our family, or even a worthy cause. But, for many of us, we derive our identity from where we spend much of our time. If you are like me, this is time spent at work. It is spent thinking about our job titles, colleagues, companies, bosses, and subordinates. We spend our time thinking about new horizons at work, strategies, and breakthroughs. But our time is also spent in disappointments. Maybe a promotion or title not received or even the loss of a job. In all these things, it is easy to forget that for those of us who believe in Christ Jesus as our Lord and Savior, we are on a mission—the Great Commission set forth by Jesus himself in Matthew 28: 19-20a:Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you.Jesus is commanding we declare the gospel—the good news! Now, I realize we are likely not going to baptize our coworkers, but we can look to this verse as a foundational calling and a promise. In the final sentence of verse 20, Jesus says, and behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.We are living on a mission, and we often forget we carry this missional living to our workplaces. In this mission, we can remember our identity belongs to God.Armed with this thinking, you may be asking yourself what discipleship looks like at work. In another segment, I talked about what I have personally deemed as Faith at Work 1.0. Don’t over complicate your thinking in this matter but show up each day knowing Jesus is with you always, to the end of the age. He is with you and asking you to become more like him each day with how you reflect his light and glory to those around you!Matthew 5:14-16 exhorts: You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.Shine your light. Let those around you see your good works and give glory to God! For some of us this is easy, but maybe you are in a stifling work environment. Maybe you feel heaviness each day as you get ready for work. You are putting forth your very best effort to do good work, but no one sees it.Proverbs 15:3 reminds us that the eyes of the Lord are everywhere, keeping watch on the wicked and the good. God sees your good works and will use them for his glory, especially when you are least expecting it!What are some practical ways to live missionally at work? And, more practically, what are “good works”? Perhaps it is as simple as being the person who does not engage in gossip. Instead, you are the opposite, always seeking the good in others and lifting them up with a positive word. Maybe you help someone who has a heavy workload or even a heavy burden. As a woman, how can you support other women at work? Are there moms balancing kids back in school with work? How can you creatively encourage them? I find the most practical mission we can be on at the office is to reflect the love of Christ to others we are around. Make them ask why you are filled with joy and have a spring in your step. Make them ask why you are so encouraged during a difficult trial at work. It will give you a chance to let them know you always have Jesus by your side!Back to our identity. It is easy to revert to forgetting whose mission we are on. I like to keep the verse Colossians 3:23-24 front and center in my workspace.Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward.
I’ve been examining what it would look like if you and I, as Christ-followers, determined to live like we’re dying. That will look very different in all our lives. I think of a friend who had a difficult boss, and she could have filed a legitimate discrimination claim against him. Others urged her to do just that. But God showed her for the time being to simply let it go. She obeyed. God used it in her life to transform her more into the likeness of Jesus, and no doubt, as a testimony to her co-workers. She was leaving a Christ-honoring footprint there on her job.I think of a friend whose marriage was anything but ideal. She chose through many years to stick it out, to insist he get help, and to work through all kinds of baggage. They’re still together, and it’s better, much better. She has obeyed what God told her to do concerning her marriage. She’s leaving behind a legacy of a godly woman who told God she wanted to do his will, whatever the cost.Living like you’re dying means you simply walk through your everyday life totally dedicated to doing God’s will. It means you hold everything in open hands and give God permission to change your plans at any time.But the day of the Lord will come like a thief. The heavens will disappear with a roar; the elements will be destroyed by fire, and the earth and everything in it will be laid bare. Since everything will be destroyed in this way, what kind of people ought you to be? You ought to live holy and godly lives as you look forward to the day of God and speed its coming (2 Peter 3:10-12).Living like you’re dying produces holy and godly lives, and that kind of life leaves a footprint that cannot be missed, that is priceless and eternal.
I’m exploring this week about living like you’re dying. Yesterday we looked at the very short parable about the man who found a treasure in a field and then sold everything he had to buy that field and have that treasure.Here’s the truth of that parable: Jesus is worth losing everything for. Jesus is the treasure we have, and he is worthy of everything. And when we get just a glimpse of how valuable this treasure is, giving up anything for Jesus is not a sacrifice. We do it with great joy, because we have a treasure that is unlike any other, so whatever we give up for that treasure is small in comparison. It’s not a sacrifice; it’s a smart transaction.As Jim Elliot put it: “He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose.”We cannot keep our days here on this earth. They pass one by one, and they are numbered. And nothing you do can change that. Your days and my days are fleeting. But what we do with our time and our efforts can last for eternity. We can send on ahead of us treasures of all kinds; we can have crowns to cast at Jesus’ feet when we stand before him in Heaven; we can leave behind us a legacy that leads others to believe.Toward the end of his very short three-and-a-half-year earthly ministry, Jesus said:I have brought you glory on earth by completing the work you gave me to do (John 17:4).My food is to do the will of him who sent me and to finish his work (John 4:34).For I have come down from heaven, not to do my will but to do the will of him who sent me (John 6:38).Why did Jesus leave the greatest footprints ever? Because he came to do the Father’s will, not his own. He was totally submissive and obedient to his Father.If it’s true—and it is—that as believers we are in the process of being transformed into the likeness of Jesus with ever-increasing glory, then it should be true of us that we are here to do the Father’s will. We’re living for eternity; living like we’re dying to this world and sending treasures ahead to our eternal dwelling place.
I’ve chosen a rather somber but really important topic for this week, and that is to live like you’re dying. What does it mean to live like you’re dying? It simply means you are intentionally and daily aware that this life is temporary, every day is a gift, and as a Christ-follower, you are going to be accountable for your priorities, your life’s focus—the footprint you’re leaving.Imagine you have a jar of marbles on your desk. There is one marble for every week you will live, if you live to be 100. Now, suppose every week you take a marble out just to remind you that your days are numbered. And then suppose you ask yourself as you remove each marble: What kind of footprint did I leave this week?The jar would gradually become less full, and it would continually remind you that you’re dying, your days are numbered, and if you’re not intentional about leaving a godly footprint that inspires those who come behind you, you won’t. This jar of marbles would be a visible and intentional way to help you to live like you’re dying.There’s a short parable in Matthew 13 that holds some really good news for us.The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field. When a man found it, he hid it again, and then in his joy went and sold all he had and bought that field (Matthew 13:44).Get the picture. This person finds a treasure in a field that is not his. He recognizes the treasure to be very valuable. He starts figuring out how he can buy this field. He doesn’t have much, but joyfully—note that word—he sells all he has so he can buy that field.Imagine what his wife or friends may have said to him? You’re selling everything you have—your home, your car, your computer, your clothes—to do what? To buy that field out there? Why? What’s there? You’re crazy! That is not a good bargain!He ignores their ridicule and buys the field because he knows the treasure there. A treasure hidden to the eyes of others, but is very clear to him. And that treasure is worth giving up everything he owns, everything he’s worked hard to get, to get that treasure.Why did he do it? Because he found something worth losing everything else for. That’s what living like you’re dying looks like—living for Jesus is more important than anything else, and you give up whatever you need to live for Jesus because he is worthy.
I am asking the question: How would your life be different if you lived like you were dying? I decided in my early thirties to live for myself, and my life’s priority was to find a husband and get married. That was what I was living for. I went to church and was involved in church, but I lived for me. I didn’t number my days, as we read in Psalm 90; I never thought about how fleeting my life was. I lived only for the here and now, wanting what I wanted and wanting it now. It looked at the time like the road to happiness, but it was just the opposite. It was the road to despair and disappointment and failure.God in his incredible grace has redeemed me, forgiven me, and given me new purpose and joy. But how much better had I numbered my days, recognized this life is short and been willing to do God’s will and not my own. That’s why I’m talking this week about living like you’re dying. Living for eternity.Think about this: If God called you home today, what would you be remembered for? Some years ago, God showed me I would be remembered as being busy. In fact, it became clear to me I found my identity in being busy, showing the world how much I could do, and then getting the recognition that came my way.I actually had a vision of my tombstone, and on it was written, “Here lies a busy woman!” Now, understand, it was not wrong for me to be busy—to be doing what God had given me to do and using my gifting in his service. But my motivation was suspect; it was not pure. I wanted—and still do at times—the praise of people.So, what would be written on your tombstone if today were your last day on earth? Here lies a successful business person Here lies a good dresser Here lies a good singer Here lies a great organizer Here lies a very creative person Here lies a really smart personOr maybe: Here lies a worrying woman or man Here lies a fearful person Here lies a lazy person Here lies a person who had no vision Here lies a person who refused to be disciplinedThink of the possible tombstones for some people in the Bible: The Apostle Paul: Here lies a man who fought the good fight and finished the race and kept the faith. Moses: Here lies the humblest man who ever lived. Esther: Here lies a courageous woman who was willing to risk her life for others. Mary Magdalene: Here lies a woman who lived her life for Jesus because he rescued her from her sin. Deborah: Here lies a woman who stepped way out of her comfort zone—way out of traditional roles—to do what God called her to do. Mary, the Mother of Jesus: Here lies the most blessed woman who ever lived.Think about the people who have influenced your life. For example, on my mother’s tombstone I could write: Here lies a woman who loved the Word of God. Here lies a woman of total integrity. Here lies a quiet, simple woman who blessed everyone in her life.It’s really important you live like you know this life is not the end-all or be-all. You’re living for eternal values—you’re living like you’re dying.
How do you want to be remembered? I wonder, do you ever think about how you want to be remembered? Another way to ask that question is what epitaph would you want on your tombstone? That may sound like a depressing topic, but actually thinking now about how you want to be remembered could make a huge difference in the way you live.Most of us shy away from talking about our death; it feels morbid. But one thing is for sure—unless Jesus comes again soon to rapture his church—all of us will face death and all of us will leave behind a legacy. It’s not morbid or depressing to think about how you want to be remembered; it’s smart, and it’s life changing. That’s why my title this week is “Live Like You’re Dying.”I wonder how we would live if each of us knew exactly when we would die. Have you ever thought about that? If God revealed to you the day, month, and year when you will pass from this life into eternity, how would it affect the way you live?Psalm 90 is titled “A prayer of Moses the man of God,” and here’s part of that prayer:Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom (Psalm 90:12).And King David prayed:Show me, O Lord, my life's end and the number of my days; let me know how fleeting my life is (Psalm 39:4).They were on the same page, even though centuries apart. They were not asking for a gift of prophecy, but rather, they were asking the Lord to help them live like they were dying—to live in the reality that their days were numbered, and their life was fleeting.How often have you prayed such a prayer: Lord, show me how fleeting—how brief, how short, how transient—my life is? Suppose we began each of our days with this prayer, asking God to help us number our days. We would then begin to live like we were dying—live in the knowledge that this world is temporary, but eternity is forever. If you’re like me, some days you think about it but most days not so much. I want to encourage you as I do myself to give regular thought to the truth that you will leave this life one day and enter eternity. Are you living with eternity’s values in mind? That’s a good question for all of us to consider.
I was introduced to this term: the ministry of presence, when a young couple in our church began a ministry to the homeless people they encountered on the streets of Chicago around where they lived. It began simply by reaching out to one or two, talking to them, inviting them to church, providing Sunday lunch for them, and it grew to over 60 homeless people they served every weekend.I love their story because it’s such a clear example of what Jesus would do. Jesus would see the needs on his doorstep, as Justin and Tara did, and he would start helping them in any way he could. In telling me their story, Justin said he had come to understand what the ministry of presence means.You see, he made it a habit to invite one of his homeless friends to run errands with him, when possible, as he went about his everyday work and routine. One day he invited one of the guys to join him, took him along, stopped for coffee and a donut, and just generally spent some time together. No agenda, no specific purpose other than to be with this man who was homeless. As they made rounds that day, the homeless man said to him, “All my life I’ve been told I am worthless and no good; they told me I was stupid, and nobody would ever like me. But I don’t believe that anymore.” Justin asked him why, and he said, “Because if I was worthless, you wouldn’t hang out with me.”Justin’s willingness to simply be with this man gave him a new understanding of his worth as a person. Justin went on to say what homeless people need more than anything else is not money or food, but it is a relationship—someone to simply be with them and care about them.You know, that’s true for most of us, isn’t it? You and I need other people in our lives just to validate our worth. Can you imagine how you would feel if you believed other people did not want to be with you? The ministry of presence is real—and it’s just what Jesus would do—what he did do when he was on earth. Think of the many stories in the Gospels where Jesus was just “hanging out” with people—some of whom were considered undesirable. There was Zacchaeus and Mary Magdalene and the woman he met at the well, to mention just a few.This is one ministry you can embrace—the ministry of presence. You and I can simply choose to be present in the lives of people who need to know they are loved by us and by God. You don’t have to preach or teach or solve their problems; you just need to be there for them and then see what God will do through you. This is a ministry every Christ-follower should take seriously, and every one of us is qualified and equipped for this ministry.Galatians 6:2 describes it this way: Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. When we care enough about someone to carry their burden, we are practicing the ministry of presence—simply being there for others, sharing their sorrows, as well as increasing their joys by our presence. This is the fulfillment of the law of Christ, the teaching of Jesus.In John 13:34 Jesus said, A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. The disciples knew the old commandments—the law which included the Ten Commandments. But this was a new commandment—note, not a suggestion—that Jesus gave them and us, and it should be a hallmark of our lives as Christ-followers.So, to fulfill the law of Christ, this new commandment, you and I need to know and practice the ministry of presence—being there for people and showing them love in action. Love that comes from Jesus through us to them.So, what I want to ask you today is: What person in your life right now could use your presence? What person needs to know someone cares and hasn’t forgotten them? Stop right now, if you can, and let God’s Spirit reveal that person to you. Perhaps a name popped right into your mind; if not, ask God to reveal that person to you.
Presented by Lisa BishopDo you pray for your coworkers? Today we’re wrapping up our week of being on mission in the workplace with a powerful way to make an impact at work: praying for our colleagues. When we pray for our boss, the executive team, customers, and coworkers, we ask for the heart of God to move in profound ways; to bring his love, wisdom, peace, and provision into their lives. We pray people will come to have a saving faith in Jesus.I urge, then, first of all, that petitions, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for all people (1 Timothy 2:1).This includes our coworkers, managers, and even those we might find challenging to get along with. Praying for our colleagues is a tangible expression of our love for them and our desire to see God's best in their lives.Think about the people you see every day at work. Each one has their own struggles, hopes, and dreams. They may be facing personal challenges, health issues, or simply the stress of daily responsibilities. When we lift them up in prayer, we invite God to work in their situations and we are partnering with God in his mission to bless and transform lives.Prayer can also change our own hearts and attitudes. It’s hard to harbor resentment or indifference toward someone you are faithfully praying for. As we pray, God softens our hearts and fills us with his love and compassion. We begin to see our colleagues through the loving, merciful, compassionate eyes of Jesus, recognizing their inherent value and worth.The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective (James 5:16).This means our prayers can have a real impact. Whether it’s a silent prayer at our desk, on a Teams call, or praying for people during your quiet time, God hears your prayers and responds.We might not always see immediate results, but we can trust God is at work in ways we cannot see.Praying for others can open doors for deeper conversations about faith. When someone shares a need or struggle with us, offering to pray for them, or even praying with them right then, can be a profound testimony of our faith and God's love. It shows we care deeply and believe in a God who is intimately involved in our lives.When you head into work, remember you are on mission. Let’s make it a habit to pray for those around us. Ask God to bless them, to guide them, and to reveal himself to them in powerful ways. Through our prayers, we become conduits of God's grace and love, bringing his light into our workplaces and fulfilling his mission.
Presented by Lisa BishopHow are you serving your coworkers? We are looking at 5 ways to be on mission at work: checking our attitudes, working with excellence, and acting with integrity. Now, I want to examine another way to be on mission at your place of employment: tending to the needs of your coworkers.Many of us spend a significant portion of our lives at work. It’s easy to get caught up in our routine, focusing on tasks, deadlines, and career advancement. But as followers of Christ, we are called to a higher purpose.Whoever wishes to become great among you shall be your servant, and whoever wishes to be first among you shall be your [willing and humble] slave; just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life as a ransom for many (Matthew 20:26-28).These powerful words challenge us to rethink our approach to our daily work. Ironically these words are Jesus’s response to two brothers vying for position, trying to snag the highest place of prestige and honor by sitting at the right hand of Jesus. It’s a great lesson for us too. I’m not implying we should not have ambitions to rise through the ranks at work but how and why we do that matters.If we are out for personal gain, people will see that, and Jesus knows our hearts. Posturing ourselves with pride puts a damper on our influence at work and the level of trust people will have in us. Are we out for our own best interest or do we desire to work for the best interest of others? Jesus had the highest position and yet he took on the attitude of humility, saw the needs of others, and served them.Serving others in the workplace means looking beyond our own needs and ambitions. It’s about seeing our colleagues as people God loves and has placed in our lives for a reason. Each day presents multiple opportunities for us to demonstrate Christ’s love through simple acts of kindness: lending a listening ear to a coworker, giving of our time and offering to help someone with a difficult project, or even just sharing a word of appreciation and encouragement.Who can you serve? Your genuine acts of service will model the heart of Jesus and just may open doors for deeper conversations about faith.
Presented by Lisa BishopAs we prepare to head into another workday, how can we reflect Christ in our daily jobs? Our work is not just for our bosses or for a paycheck. It's an act of worship and service to God. Being on mission at work means reflecting Christ's character in everything we do. This starts with integrity.The integrity of the upright guides them, but the unfaithful are destroyed by their duplicity (Proverbs 11:3).As Christians, we are called to be honest, reliable, and ethical in all our dealings. This not only pleases God but also sets a powerful example for those around us. Sometimes it can be tempting to fudge numbers, distort facts, or spin the truth to make ourselves look better. But that is not walking in a manner worthy of the gospel.For this reason, since the day we heard about you, we have not stopped praying for you. We continually ask God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives, so that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might….. (Colossians 1:9-11).This call to action reminds us first and foremost to pray. Ask God to fill you and other believers with knowledge and wisdom from the Holy Spirit as you go about your workday so that we please God in every way, and bear fruit that lasts longer than short-term gain. Pray you are strengthened by the Holy Spirit as you make decisions, and resist relying on your flesh. Praise your heavenly Father for his power at work in you; his Holy Spirit who guides you to walk in integrity.Living with integrity means we live in harmony with our deepest held values and beliefs as believers, standing firm for our principles, especially in the face of opposition. We are more concerned with doing what is honorable in the sight of the Lord than what’s pleasing to man. We do the righteous thing even when it’s hard to do. Will there be consequences if we do not fall into the company line? Perhaps. And I am not saying it is easy. But in the long run, God will work everything out for your good.We damage our witness when we don’t walk the talk of our faith. When we live on mission, our daily lives match the message of the gospel and the character of Christ. We live our faith not merely profess it.How can you walk with greater integrity this week? Ask the Lord to guide you and let the gospel shine through you.
Presented by Lisa BishopDo you see yourself as one sent by God in your job? Many Christians don’t. We tend to see our jobs as a means to an end. A way to financially provide for ourselves and our families or to gain significance. But God has placed you where you are with a purpose. And while he gave you gifts and talents to apply to your work, our ultimate purpose as followers of Jesus is to point to him in our everyday lives.One way we can do that in the workplace is to do our work with excellence.Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving (Colossians 3:23-24).Whatever you do, and yes that includes what you do on the job. In the original language, the words “with all your heart” means “to carry out or perform an action with enthusiasm.” And when we aim to perform with energetic interest at work, we honor the Lord.What is your mindset around your role at work? Are you working with all your heart or punching a timecard, doing just enough to get by?Faith calls us to the highest standard in all aspects of our lives. Scripture challenges us to raise the bar in how we perform in our jobs, not just doing the bare minimum but going the extra mile. Are you known for your stellar work ethic? If you are a follower of Jesus, your work should surpass mediocre; you are to strive for excellence.Doing your best work is not the same as perfection. I can speak from experience, perfectionism can lead to a host of issues, one being that others may not think they can live up to your impossible standards. That can leave people feeling discouraged. While perfection is not the goal, excellence is.How we do our job matters because not only are unbelievers watching us at work to see if we will set a good example, but our heavenly Father sees too.Are you giving your best efforts on the job, or do you need to step it up a notch or two? Working heartily at all you do is part of God’s mission for you.
Presented by Lisa BishopDoes your faith make a difference in your job? Have you ever considered God has purposefully positioned you to proclaim the gospel at your workplace? Now before you picture yourself standing on your desk with a bullhorn or sitting on a Zoom call shouting scripture, don’t worry, that’s not what I mean. You aren’t necessarily called to get out your megaphone and shout the gospel like a street preacher, but you are called to proclaim the gospel with your life. What does that look like? We will examine five ways to live our faith at work and to be on mission at our workplace.We tend to think of pastors, church staff, or men and women who get sent to foreign countries as missionaries. But have you ever considered your workplace as the place God has placed you to be on mission? Well, the truth is, God has placed you at your job for a purpose, and whether he has you there for 12 months or 10 years, how will you live with a heavenly perspective?As a follower of Jesus, everything we do is for the glory of God, and when we live on mission, we live on purpose for the purposes of God.One way to live on mission in the workplace is by checking our attitudes and minding our disposition. What is your mood at work? How would your coworkers describe your temperament? Are you easily angered, argumentative, impatient, or dismissive of people who disagree with you? Divisive with your words or demeaning with your tone? Or are you approachable, personable, and peaceable? Do you give other people credit instead of keeping it for yourself?Your behavior with your coworkers will be the litmus test to your credibility as a follower of Jesus. I was having lunch with a woman the other day and asked her how she was doing. She proceeded to tell me how she’d fallen into some poor behavior habits at work. Displaying impatience, irritation, and getting sucked into gossip circles; at times, she was the instigator of dragging down people’s character with her words. She knows she is not putting God on display when she behaves that way. If you take an honest inventory of your personality at work, do you point to Jesus? I am not saying we will perfectly represent God; we are human after all. But do we purpose our interactions at work to point to him?But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law (Galatians 5:22-23).When the power of the Holy Spirit is evident in our lives, we are a credible witness to our coworkers. We live on mission and proclaim the gospel with our lives when we behave in a way that produces good fruit.
Presented by Lisa BishopBefore we dive in let me tell you that the idea of discerning calling has been a journey for me. The topic of calling can be confusing and sometimes frustrating as we try to figure out how God is leading us. While I do not have all the answers, I hope to give you food for thought that fuels you to find time to spend with the Lord who will give you guidance and clarity on your calling as you seek him. As a working definition of calling, I want to look at what John Maxwell has to say.“Calling is God’s personal invitation (for me) to work on His agenda, using the talents I (you) have been given in ways that are eternally significant.”I love that reminder of truth. As followers of Jesus, when we live out our calling, we ultimately do so to glorify God. We steward the gifts and talents he has uniquely gifted us. When we think about calling it can be so easy to think it is about us but it’s not. Now, I do believe God wants us to experience fulfillment in the things he has for us to do, but that is not the end goal.And as we think about calling it is so much more than just a job or career path. Ultimately whatever we do and the way we live is meant to serve God's purpose. God calls us to serve and contribute our giftings in a way that is consistent with how he created us. Discerning our calling is about learning how God has designed us to glorify him, serve his purposes, and serve others.We will focus on the career aspect of our calling, but before we do that, we must be absolutely clear that our first calling as followers of Jesus is to a relationship with him. If we do not grasp that our highest calling is to live in vibrant, continual communion with God through the indwelling presence of the Holy Spirit and to be an ambassador of Christ no matter where he places us, then we miss the point. Our specific callings cannot be properly engaged apart from a deep relationship with Jesus. Only out of our relationship with him does our subsequent calling, the work God has created us to do, come.Everything begins and ends with the vitality of our walk with Jesus and listening to the Holy Spirit. If we do not have a consistent rhythm of spending time in Scripture, on our knees in prayer, drawing near and pressing our ear to hear the voice of the Holy Spirit, we will have little confidence that our thoughts and our walk will be in alignment with him. It is essential we cultivate true abiding with Jesus if we want a chance of discerning his voice from our own when making career and calling decisions.We do not want to make a move without a move of the Holy Spirit, and we simply cannot take shortcuts by cutting God out of the picture and not intentionally taking the time to seek him. As we wrestle with calling, it may require fasting or even taking some time to get out of the hustle and bustle of life and into a remote location. Take time to journal, pray, listen, and respond.Renewing your mind in the Word will be crucial to discerning your calling. Hearing God’s call requires posturing yourself to hear his voice.And let me say this, our identity is to be found in our relationship with Christ, not in the work God calls us to or our job title.I read a quote the other day that said, “You are not here to make a living….You are here to enrich the world” (Woodrow Wilson).God created us to work, it's a blessing, not a curse. Our work can have eternal purpose, and our lives can have fullness and meaning through the work God calls us to.Something to note, your calling does not necessarily have to be the way you make money. It may be. But you also may be called to serve your community or church, raise kids, or care for aging parents. Whether we use our gifts to serve in the workplace, our homes, or communities, as Colossians 3:23 says, whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters….As it relates to our careers and calling in the...
Imagine you have to stand trial because you are a Christian. The prosecutor must show evidence you are indeed a Christian. What evidence would there be?Evidence of FaithCould evidence be shown to prove you really have faith in God—that you trust him with your life? You know, if you are trusting God with your life, with your future, it will show. It will be evident.When you’re facing tough times and difficult circumstances, is it clear to others you are trusting God for those things? Are you ready and willing to tell how God has been faithful to you? Do you remember and share what God has done in your life to prove he is faithful and trustworthy? Could people who know you say, “I know she has faith in God because of the way she deals with life”?Evidence of PurityLiving a pure life by biblical standards is not only considered impossible by many today, but totally out-of-step with today’s “progressive culture.” Purity of life includes sexual purity as well as a life of integrity, of honesty, of just simply always doing the right thing regardless of the cost. It includes your financial dealings and business practices. They should be so pure no one could find fault with them if everything was revealed.Here’s a simple poem that says a lot:You are writing a Gospel, a chapter each day,By the deeds that you do and the words that you say.People read what you write—distorted or true.What is the Gospel according to you?[1]People who don’t know Jesus don’t typically read the Bible. But they read the people who read the Bible.We’re not likely to be on trial any time soon—at least not in this country—for our faith, although that day could come. But the Bible says every true believer will stand before Jesus to give an account of how we’ve lived our life. So, the real question today for us Christians is: Will Jesus find evidence in our lives that we have been faithful witnesses of who he is and what he has done for us? Will your faith stand up in that court?[1] Paul Gilbert
I’m asking you to consider this question: If you were on trial for being a Christian, would there be evidence to convict you?Evidence in LoveThere’s an old song that goes, “They will know we are Christians by our love.”Jesus said, a new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another (John 13:34–35).There’s no wiggle room here, is there? Love is what we should be about. I ask myself, and I ask you, if you were on trial, could you prove you are a Christian by the way you love others? Jesus said two things were important—two principles: Love God and love people. And notice Jesus said this is a new command—to love one another. In other words, just keeping the law and checking off all the boxes is not enough; it has to come from a heart of love.Thankfully, the kind of love Jesus refers to is not necessarily a feeling. It is an action, based on the definition of love as given in 1 Corinthians 13.Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails (1 Corinthians 13:4-8).Whether or not you like the way someone behaves or approve of their lifestyle—whether or not their personality suits you or not—you can show love to them through your actions.We’ve looked at three clear pieces of evidence that should convict us of being a Christian: the words we speak, the lifestyle we lead, the love we show. Just asking those questions is an important exercise for me—to cause me to pause and ask God to control my tongue and how I spend my time, and to remind me to show the love of Jesus to everyone in my life. I truly want it to be readily clear that I follow Jesus Christ—and I’m sure you do as well.
The Bible tells us as Christ-followers, we are representatives on earth of Jesus and our lives should bear real evidence we are Christians. I’m asking if there would be enough evidence in your life to convict you of being a Christian. Yesterday, I talked about evidence in the way we talk. Here’s another area that witnesses will note.Evidence in Our ConductImagine someone followed you around for a month or so and looked for evidence that proved you were a Christian. Would they be able to accuse you of: Faithful attendance to and involvement with a local Bible-believing church Daily times of personal worship—Bible reading, prayer Spending time helping others in various ways Involved in small group Bible study or some other regular Bible study Supporting God’s work with your time and moneyWould they accuse you of being joyful all the time? Would they have evidence that you always spoke the truth in love? Would it be clear by your conduct that you considered others more important than yourself, and you had a servant attitude?If someone followed you everywhere you went, would they note you were very selective about the movies you watched, and the television programs you viewed? What books would they see you reading—edifying books that inspired you?Would the way you spend your time indicate following Jesus was your highest priority—or would they observe you wasting lots of time on things that really don’t matter? What would they say about the way you spend your money? Do you give faithfully to God’s work, or do you spend it all on yourself?When we stop and ask ourselves questions like this, it’s a bit sobering, isn’t it? But it’s important we think about the messages our words and lives are sending to others.
If you were on trial accused of being a Christian, would there be enough evidence to convict you? Let’s look at some of the evidence that would prove you’re a Christian.Evidence in Your SpeechIf everything you said was recorded for a day or a week, would your words be strong evidence that you are a Christ-follower, or would they sound no different than any others?This is one of the most important ways our lives as Christians should be differentiated from others—the words we speak and the conversations we engage in. Here is the biblical standard for our speech—our words.Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen (Ephesians 4:29).That’s a high standard, isn’t it? And it would be easily recognized as different in our world today. No unwholesome talk—only speaking what will build others up and benefit them. That is the kind of evidence that would show you are a Christ-follower.In your normal everyday life, how do you speak about people you don’t like? Are your words always full of condemnation and criticism, or do you speak of others—even those you don’t particularly admire—in words of kindness and understanding? If your words were recorded for a week, would we hear a lot of griping and complaining, or would those recordings be full of praise to God and thankfulness?Someone has said our words should be true, necessary, and kind. Apply those three principles to your speech, and if you’re like me, you will say fewer words than usual!Jesus said, a good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of (Luke 6:45).What do you think the verdict would be? Would you be convicted of being a Christian because of the words you say, the conversations you engage in, the way you talk?
If you were on trial because you are a Christian, would there be enough evidence to convict you? That’s the question I’m posing this week. It’s a question that gets to the heart of whether those of us who claim to be Christians really live by biblical principles and priorities. Whether the world around us can see any difference in the way we live, the way we respond, the priorities of our lives as compared to everyone else.Imagine you are on trial, having been accused of being a Christian. The prosecutor would call witnesses who would be asked whether they have seen any clear evidence to convict you of being a Christian. What would they say? Is there a coworker who would confidently say, “I know she’s a Christian because. . .”? Or how about a family member? Or a neighbor?Jesus said, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven (Matthew 5:16).How brightly is your light shining? Does it shine consistently enough so those who are in your world know that you are a Christian?Years ago, for a period, I was not a shining witness for Christ. The people who worked with me would not have been able to accuse me of being a Christian. I remember once telling a coworker I went to church, and he was surprised. He said, “I didn’t know you were a religious person.” And it’s true—he didn’t know because there was no evidence in my life at that time that would have convicted me of being a Christ-follower.That’s a sad commentary for sure, but thank God it is not now the case, and thank God he puts our past behind us and opens new paths for us to serve him.Paul wrote to his disciple, Timothy:Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity (1 Timothy 4:12).That’s a high bar, isn’t it—to set an example in the way we talk, in the way we conduct ourselves, in the way we love other people, in the way we trust God, and in the purity of our lives. That’s the kind of evidence that proves you have been changed by God through faith in Jesus Christ.
Risk-averse is a term often used by financial managers to describe people who do not want to take risks with their investments. They want low-risk investments, and that can be a prudent way to handle your money. But should we always be risk-averse?Ron Hutchcraft told a story that illustrates what I’m talking about. He said he had been invited to go hiking with some friends in a gorgeous setting, to see a breathtaking waterfall. Ron was determined to see it. So, they hiked up the mountain and came to a large stream they had to cross to get to the waterfall. Ron took a look at the stream and started searching for a bridge, but there was none. He said to his companions, "How do we get across here?""Oh," they said, "you have to walk across the pipe there.” Ron looked at the pipe that bridged the stream. It was small; it was wet; it looked dangerous. And his first reaction was, "Thanks but no thanks. I'll stay here.” But his friends urged him, "Come on. You can't stay here. The view is on the other side. Wait ‘til you see the view and the waterfall. Come on; walk across the pipe."Ron had a decision to make. Either stay where he was and miss the view or walk across the pipe. He decided to take the risky way, and he walked across. He said, "I wouldn't have missed that view for anything. It was the most beautiful sight I've ever seen. But I had to walk the pipe to get there."Yes, it was a bit risky, but it was worth the risk. You know, as we live our lives for Jesus, there will be times when we need to take a risk, move out of our comfort zones, attempt something that looks difficult, and yes, even run the possibility of failing. For example, maybe God has been prompting you to share your faith with a coworker, but you’ve been reluctant to do so because it’s risky. You think: That coworker may react negatively, or I may botch it and say all the wrong things. Or maybe it’s against the law to share my faith on the job! And so that fear keeps you from taking the risk.I wonder how many of us are missing out on so much of what God wants us to do and the blessings that come when we obey, simply because we’re not willing to take a risk. Obviously, we shouldn’t take unnecessary risks, and we should always proceed with prayer and caution. But my friends, if you’re afraid of any risk, you may never do all the good things God has put you here to do. You’ll miss so much of God’s blessing in your life.The Bible is full of stories of risk-takers. Esther took a great risk to rescue her people from annihilation. This young, inexperienced woman literally took her life in her hands and approached the king. Before doing that, she asked for all the Jews to pray and fast for her. That’s a good principle. You shouldn’t just go headlong into some risk without knowing God is leading you and knowing you are fortified with prayer. But once she knew she had to take this risk, she said, “I will go to the king even though it is against the law. And if I perish, I perish.”Esther was a meek, humble young woman. She was not equipped for such an assignment. She could have given many legitimate excuses why she could not take this risk of approaching the king to save her people. But she knew it was a unique opportunity, and she knew it was the right thing to do. She did face the possibility of failure; she knew the extent of the risk she took, but she knew she had to do it. So, she said, “If I perish, I perish.”You see, many of us are very willing to serve Jesus as long as it's comfortable and not terribly demanding. We have our life plan in place, and we've put Jesus in the schedule. Yes, we love him, but after all, we're not all called to be missionaries, right? So, we get to the edge of the river, and we take a look across. We see some people there who seem to soar and enjoy the other side. But we keep looking at that pipe; it's risky; it takes faith. And we decide to stay where the ground is firm, and we're not at risk.Oh,
Presented by Lauren StibgenWhat does love require? Part of missional living—especially at work—requires us to approach all things with love. Today we will see how Paige believes we live life on mission with each other to restore all things—even those things at work!Paige is an executive leader of business transformations, leading the global program management for a large company that provides customers protection plans through different partners across the globe. Her current charge is being deemed a moonshot customer experience initiative. Basically, the organization knows the goals are extraordinary, and she is accountable! Not only does she hold this work as a leader, but she is a wife and mom to three children in their teens and twenties.Paige used to think her Jesus-centered values would conflict with the way she needed to show up at work and says she couldn’t have been more wrong. A podcast on a God-centered approach to leadership helped her connect the dots. The things that made her a good leader (authenticity, integrity led, caring, clear) were the same values that come from the fruit of the Spirit. It helped her see her life as one big mission field instead of thinking about work in a totally different context.When Paige goes to work, she views her mission as twofold.First, she strives to authentically live out the values Jesus taught and asks herself in every situation, what does love require?She knows this type of love requires her to be grounded and filled with the Holy Spirit and covered in prayer. It also requires that she lives with integrity and back up her words with action.Paige recently got a tattoo on her wrist of the Hebrew and English word hesed, which is hard to pin down to a singular definition, but it basically means unimaginable loving kindness. It is the loving kindness we receive from our God, and only from him. This tattoo has opened many conversations for Paige. It serves as an opportunity to tell people what she stands for and serves as a reminder of how deeply she is loved and how her job is to deeply love others, no matter the current crisis or hot button issue that comes her way!Second, Paige strives to create an authentic, come-as-you-are community within the teams she leads and within her leadership circles. That means creating time and space to get to know each person and time to foster trust and an inclusive community. She makes sure she takes advantage of opportunities to be vulnerable to create and build connections. Sharing the role her faith plays in her day-to-day life helps her show her authentic self and the strengths God has gifted her with as a leader.Most of the sharing Paige does is through one-on-one conversation. She is not afraid to share how she spends her time and the things she is praying for. By sharing her life outside of work, Paige learned she was doing a spiritual fast at the same time as someone on her team. She even had a great discussion with someone else on her team about leading girls’ groups at church because she wasn't afraid to share why she had Wednesday night commitments.Paige says, “I think God has given me a path of experiences that have uniquely positioned me to lead in the space I am now, adding value in a completely authentic way. I see him using my trials and successes as opportunities for me to share more about myself and my belief systems and then to demonstrate my values. I see him continuing to leverage me to mentor other women, and to continuously point to him.”
Presented by Lauren StibgenDo you acknowledge God when you celebrate success at work? Pointing to God’s favor in your work and boldly proclaiming your faith at work can be another way to live on mission in your day to day like my friend Cathi.Cathi is a Sr. National Director for Childhelp. Since 1959, Childhelp has saved and transformed the lives of more than 12 million children suffering from abuse and neglect. Cathi’s role is to raise the vital funds for these children. She is truly serving the least of these.For Cathi, tragedy and grief transformed her work into a mission to share Jesus wherever she goes, even amidst profound sorrow. Two years ago, she tragically lost her son Ben to a Fentanyl overdose on the streets of Los Angeles. This devastating loss shattered her world and propelled her into a deep prayer life, considering more about what Jesus wanted her to do. Cathi finds solace in sharing her faith, particularly with those who are struggling or marginalized. She spends a great deal of her time with the homeless and drug addicts.To Cathi, missional living is about intentionally aligning her life with a purpose that revolves around serving others. Working at Childhelp allows her the privilege to directly engage with children and families in need. She states, “As a follower of Christ, it's imperative that I serve the least of these, making a tangible difference for God's kingdom.”Throughout her career, she has made it a point to acknowledge God's role in her successes openly. Whether securing major donations or interacting with colleagues, she gives all credit to Jesus.Recently, during an all-staff meeting, the chief of staff highlighted this commitment, affirming her dedication to glorifying God in all she does.Cathi has initiated a Friday morning prayer session after their team meetings for her colleagues. This time has become a sacred space where they seek God's guidance and blessings for their work at Childhelp. She firmly believes God opens doors, provides wisdom, and brings the right people to support our mission of helping abused children.Psalm 139:1-24 holds special significance for Cathi. It's a chapter she memorized with her sons when they were young, and it remains a source of comfort and strength. As she reflects on her journey, she finds assurance in every word of this Psalm, knowing God intimately knows when she sits down and when she rises. Cathi knows God was with her boy when he took his last breath and is with her today in everything she does!
Presented by Lauren StibgenWhen you think of your work as your mission maybe this quote from Bob Goff will resonate with you, “It’s not mission work, it’s just Tuesday.” Seamlessly blending work and mission can help you wake up to say “it’s just Tuesday” like Tracy.Tracy leads post-merger and acquisition business integration for a medical device manufacturing and distribution company. Her job is to bring people together under one unified company using the same tools and technologies. She states, “missional living is bringing his kingdom world to light in this world, through everyday acts and behaviors. It is starting my day and incorporating God’s mindset to whoever and whatever I do to serve him, not my own ego.” Tracy is truly a builder. The book of Nehemiah has a lot of meaning for her as he is a builder, and her work requires building or rebuilding in many different facets of the business. The joy of the Lord is my strength is a verse Tracy keeps close as she works to build the company and others each day.A few years ago, Tracy didn't depend on God for her work. When her pride was hit hard, working for a boss who didn’t believe in her, she realized how much she needed God to help her in a situation she couldn't solve herself. Starting each day reading Scripture and praying helped Tracy change her own mindset about how she thought of work verses how she realized God wanted her to work.Building this daily habit took time, but she couldn’t imagine a day without starting in his Word. It grounds her and directs her focus for the day as a leader.Being focused on God’s word has helped Tracy to subtly weave God’s wisdom into her day to day. Often, she will use his Word in the coaching and encouragement she gives to her team and peers. They may not know it as a specific verse, but she is able to pour into people with God’s Word. Sometimes, Tracy will wear something with a bible verse on it to start conversation! It really is subtle, but it is her dedication to being in the Word that helps her keep this consistent in her leadership.When peers have gone through serious professional and personal challenges, Tracy does share her faith. She has felt them welcome God’s Word and wisdom into some very difficult situations. Sharing her faith and specific ways she feels God can provide comfort, has also helped her develop deeper relationships at work.This past year, several male leaders at Tracy’s company have had severe medical or other personal issues impact them or their families. She came alongside them as an encourager, intentionally checking in, telling them she is praying for them. It has been accepted with much gratitude. She feels like God has positioned her to be an encourager at work and enjoys leaning into this strength that she views as a gift from God. Sharing God at work can be subtle or more direct!
Presented by Lauren StibgenWho do you really work for and how do you face challenges at work? Missional living can truly show up in how you consider who you are working for each day and how you choose to handle challenges. My friend Jenn is focused on becoming more reliant on Jesus in these challenges, and her focus on living out her faith at work truly helps her as a leader each day!Jenn is a Chief People Officer at a multifamily development and management company. She is responsible for people and culture, which means she is truly at the helm of how people feel about their work! From leadership development and coaching to hiring and strategic planning, Jenn has a pulse on every part of her organization!To her, living out her faith at work is a mission that she measures by how she approaches her work each day in living out her actions and through her interactions with her team, customers and partners. Focusing on her gifts of leadership and hospitality, she knows she can impact people both at work and at home.God has changed her thinking about work; she does it all for the Lord. All her work is ultimately for him and his kingdom. Framing her thinking in this way helps Jenn do her best work regardless of the circumstances or her feelings, and she does this by keeping Colossians 3:23 top of mind.Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters (Colossians 3:23).God has moved most recently through her at work through the Holy Spirit calling her to share more of her own challenges vulnerably with others. She states she has found when she shares, others feel safe to share about themselves and genuine authentic relationships are built. Challenges have given Jenn an opportunity to rely more on Jesus knowing he cared for all people. Experiencing this feeling herself makes it easier for her to extend this to others.She states, “We all face sufferings at one time or another and have an undercurrent that we are dealing with that others may not even know about or understand.” While Jenn is not thankful FOR all circumstances, she tries to be thankful IN all circumstances.Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us (Romans 5:3-5).For Jenn, and for me too, learning how to endure challenges is an ongoing work in progress, but she realizes how she responds in these times is a great example to those she leads and coaches at work. She leans on the grace and forgiveness we receive through Jesus when she falls short, which allows her to extend this grace and forgiveness to others.Jenn believes work is a gift! She states “We get to work. Let’s rejoice in our ability to work for the Lord!”
Presented by Lauren StibgenHave you ever felt like you aren’t doing enough? Maybe you are like me, wondering if what I do everyday matters for the Kingdom of God. I know I don’t feel equipped in the way the church sometimes calls others to mission trips. I would sometimes wonder what was wrong with me. Why didn’t I feel an urgency to jump on a plane and bring water to a village in Africa or head to a remote village in South America to help in an orphanage? These are big deals to God!I started to think about missional living in the places I spent the most time. For me, it was at work and at home. Before I started to focus on bringing the gospel to the world, I thought about what I was doing within the context of where I was spending the most time. And then I was honest with myself. I wasn’t living missionally at all. Much of my gospel thinking was a self-focused exercise. I was passionate about Jesus, but it was an internal passion.I started by setting out with one word: bold. Ephesians 6:19-20 inspired this in me.Pray also for me, that whenever I speak, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may declare it fearlessly, as I should (Ephesians 6:19-20).Paul declared this verse from prison, but I am free! This meant I needed to step out of my comfort zone and not only learn more about how to be a better disciple for God, but to choose specific situations to be bold with my faith at work.I also realized I couldn’t do this without the support of God and the Holy Spirit, but also that I was equipped with others that wanted to share in a discipleship journey just like me. Community with other believers has served as an encouragement and a deep opportunity for mutual uplifting and development.As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another (Proverbs 27:17).What has followed is a rich community of women who lean in and pray for each other and encourage each other to be bold with the gospel in their work lives.In the coming days, you will hear about Jennifer, Cathi, Tracy, and Paige. Each one of them is on a mission to share the gospel at work. And, while they all share in their foundations of success, God’s Word, the Holy Spirit and prayer empower them to be bold!I hope you will be encouraged to be on a mission right where you are this week. God has you right where you need to be!
If Christ’s love is in us and his joy is made complete in us like described in John 15:11, why are so many of us living a life without joy? Lisa Bishop talks with our friend Juni Felix to discuss this important question and offer some practical tips on cultivating joy in our lives. As followers of Jesus, were designed for joy!
Thank God it's Fri … Monday! My guess is some of you have already thanked God it's Friday, but what I've been trying to do this week is to help you see how you can truly learn to say, "Thank God it's Monday." Thank God for work, for your job assignment, and for what God is going to do with you and through you in your job.Look again at the first work assignment as given to Adam; God never left him alone. God was always there with him. If you have received Christ as Savior, you are never alone; he is with you in all your work.In fact, he has invited us to come to him and take his yoke upon us. A yoke is a wooden block that holds two animals together while they work. Jesus wants to share his yoke with you, to have you work right beside him, and the good news is, his yoke is easy. When you go to your job each day yoked up with Jesus, working with him beside you, your job become much easier. That's one way Jesus redeems our work from the curse.Now, think of all that contention in your workplace; that dog-eat-dog attitude that permeates your job; the unfairness and discrimination and selfishness that is rampant. It all started when work was cursed with thorns and thistles. But because Jesus became a curse for us on the cross, we don't have to live under that curse anymore, and that means we can and should have a transformed attitude toward work.This means you can demonstrate the transforming power of Jesus Christ by your attitude toward work, because you’ve been set free from the curse of the law through faith in Jesus Christ. You may have to work in a corrupted environment, but you don't have to be corrupted by it. You can stand out in that crowd as a bright light of hope by demonstrating a transformed attitude toward your work.You see, the only way that workplace will be changed is when the individual hearts of people are changed. And God may have you there for that very reason—to help some of those people see their need for God through the way you work. Pretty exciting, don't you think?But it must begin with your attitude toward work—an attitude of thankfulness, an attitude of anticipation, an attitude of doing what God has called you to do. Then you can honestly say: Thank God it's Monday!
Thank God it's Monday! I know it's Thursday. But the title of my series this week is "Thank God It's Monday," because when we are born from above, we can truly say that and mean it.Work is a gift from God, and as intended by him, it brings contentment, fulfillment, enjoyment, and all those good things we keep looking for. The problem is, work fell under the curse when Adam and Eve sinned, and from that time on, it has been corrupted by sin. That corruption has caused many to have an unhealthy attitude toward work, and that includes Christians.Here's the great news.Christ redeemed us from the curse of the law by becoming a curse for us, for it is written: 'Cursed is everyone who is hung on a tree.' (Galatians 3:13).Jesus Christ came to redeem us from the curse of work. With Jesus in control of your life, you can realize the original purpose of work and be set free from the corruption that has made work a dirty word for many.Now, to do that, you must first have a personal relationship with Jesus through faith. Then, you must make sure the work you are doing is God's assignment for you. God has work for each of his children to do, and when God gives you work, it is sacred. Whether you call it secular or sacred, if you’re doing what God wants you to do, it is sacred work.Looking at Adam again, he was given a divine job assignment, and as long as he was willing to obey, he was living in paradise. Work was wonderful; everything was sweet. But he was also given the freedom to rebel against God's plan for his life, and unfortunately, he chose to do that. You and I have the same freedom to rebel against God's plans for our lives, but when we do, we pay the price.If you want to transform your workday into something meaningful and worthwhile, develop the right perspective toward the work you do, and do it as unto the Lord. Think each day that you report to Jesus. You work for him, and you will be demonstrating a totally new attitude, which will show to everyone you work with and for.
Work as given by God can be fulfilling, rewarding, meaningful, and pleasant. Right, you're thinking, if you work for some Christian organization or church. No, that's not what I mean.In Genesis 1 and 2 we see the first work assignment given by God to Adam and Eve. He told them to be fruitful and increase in number—to fill the earth and subdue it. To rule over the creature world, and to name all the living creatures. Then he assigned Adam the job of taking care of the garden. That was Adam's job description.Notice as originally intended, work was assigned by God and man obeyed. And it's interesting to note the first job description would be thought of by most Christians today as a "secular" job. But since God assigned it, it had to be sacred, right? The same is true today. The nature of the work you do does not determine if it is sacred or not. Work is sacred when it is assigned by God.Now, I ask you to think of your own work situation, whether you're in the workforce or working without a paycheck! Has your work been assigned to you by God? Are you confident you are in the job God wants you to be in? God doesn't ask us what we want to do. He assigns us work.For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do (Ephesians 2:10).God is not here to make us feel fulfilled in the career or work that we choose. We are here to do the good work that he has prepared for us to do.Maybe going to work is hard for you because you're asking God to help you accomplish your plans, and he's waiting for you to give him the blank piece of paper and ask him to write the plan. Even when you get the job you think you want or make the money you want to earn, if it is not God's plan for your life, you're going to be miserable. Work is rewarding and fulfilling only when we are obediently doing the work God has assigned us to do.How do you know what God wants you to do? You spend time with the Lord and his Word, you put first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and I promise you, without fail, you'll know whether God wants you where you are or whether you're supposed to be somewhere else.When we have the job God intended for us to have, work is redeemed from the curse. It is sacred. We can do our work to God's glory, and we can enjoy work as originally intended by our Creator.
Tell me the truth: Were you delighted to go to work today? Or were you thinking, "Whoa, it's only Tuesday; four more days until the weekend”?Why do we find this fairly universal attitude toward work? Everyone seems to live for the weekends. The title of my series this week is "Thank God It's Monday!" because if you're a Christ-follower and have been set free from sin and its curse by faith in Jesus, then you can—and should— have a totally different view of your work. You should be able to honestly say, "Thank God it's Monday—or Tuesday!"We saw yesterday God gave Adam work to do in the Garden of Eden, and until sin entered the picture, work was something to be enjoyed, something fulfilling and meaningful. Everything God created was good, so work was good. The original workplace was pleasant, a place of fellowship with others and with God, a place of cooperation and obedience. Adam's job was to take care of the garden—or farm—and that was a sacred assignment from God, not some secular job he had to do to earn a living.But once sin entered, that original plan was corrupted. And from that point on work became drudgery. Do you wonder why your workplace seems so miserable sometimes, or why relationships are so strained where you work, or why it's so difficult to get motivated in your job? It's because work has suffered the "thorns and thistles" of the curse as found in Genesis 3.In our corrupted workplaces, people reject God and often any other authority placed over them. There may be little cooperation and lots of jealousy. Seems like everybody is out for number one with little regard for the welfare of others. The workplace is ruled by human nature and that is a sinful nature.And here you are, a born-again believer in Jesus Christ, forced to go out into that corrupted workplace five days a week! Do you sometimes just long to be set free from this sin-corrupted work environment?Here’s the thing. Jesus came to redeem us from the curse of sin, but he purposely left us in this world. We now have the amazing opportunity to demonstrate what work is really supposed to be like—yes, even in the midst of that corrupted workplace! Have you ever thought about the privilege you have to show your world how God intended work to be? Do you do that? Would you like to?I'll give you some suggestions starting tomorrow.
Thank God it's Monday! I'm sure you have already said that today, haven't you? No? Are you more prone to say, "Thank God it's Friday!"?Often, we see work as a necessary duty, toilsome and difficult, often unpleasant, frequently boring, but nonetheless essential. Typically, on Monday mornings, as we face a new work week, we're more likely to be thinking "I'll be glad when the weekend gets here, and I don't have to go to work."You know, God is the originator of work, and work was a part of his wonderful plan for people.The Lord God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it (Genesis 2:15).Adam was given a job as a farmer of sorts, and it was not a secular job; it was a sacred trust from God. Work is God's perfect plan for people. God meant it to bring purpose and fulfillment to our lives.How did we get to the "Thank God it's Friday" attitude? Well, once sin entered the picture through the disobedience of Adam and Eve, everything good God created was corrupted, including work. Sin caused work to be cursed. You'll find that curse in Genesis 3 where God said to Adam:Cursed is the ground because of you; through painful toil you will eat food from it all the days of your life. It will produce thorns and thistles for you, and you will eat the plants of the field. By the sweat of your brow you will eat your food until you return to the ground … (Genesis 3:17-19).Paraphrase: You'll have to work, like you've been doing, but now it's going to be full of difficulties. You'll earn your living, but the thorns and thistles will make it unpleasant, and it will be painfully toilsome at times.Maybe that sounds like a description of what you face as you start your work today, whether it's in a workplace or in your home. But because we, as believers, have been set free from the curse, we can also be set free from this sin-cursed attitude toward work. This week I'm going to try to give you a birds-eye view of the redeemed attitude toward work we should have—and can have—as believers.
This year, The Christian Working Woman celebrates 40 years of ministry to women in the workplace! Lisa Bishop has the pleasure of interviewing the woman who started it all—Mary Lowman. It's remarkable what God has done through one person who was simply willing to be used by God. Join us for part two of this conversation as we recount the Lord’s faithfulness!
How can you build relationships with your co-workers, so you have an opportunity to share God’s love with them, tell them of your faith journey, and be a witness for Jesus on the job? That’s what we’ve been looking at this week. I’ve offered eight suggestions so far, and if you missed any of them, they are all available on our website at christianworkingwoman.orgToday we’re looking at the last two ways we can share God’s love on the job.9. Be ready to apologize when you need to.My friend, Janet, says the major difference between her and her co-workers who are not yet believers is she apologizes more often! Being humble enough to apologize when you’re wrong is definitely a God thing, and it really does go a long way to breaking down barriers and solving problems.10. Build relationships with your coworkers by using work break times as an opportunity to talk.It is not appropriate to use any significant amount of company time for personal conversations. But there is your lunch hour and other times you can use for building relationships.Let me tell you about my friend, Cynthia. Many years ago, she worked in a difficult environment, where she was not fully accepted as a co-equal, because she is African American. She sensed this attitude, particularly on the part of one coworker, who told her they could never be friends because of their ethnic differences. But Cynthia, determined by God’s grace to overcome those differences, began what she called Project Love. Each week, she invited one of her coworkers to have lunch with her. She even designed special invitations for them, and so one by one, she began Project Love. That began to break down those barriers as her coworkers got to know her and vice versa. And the woman who declared they could never be friends—well, as it turns out, she has become a close friend and confidant of Cynthia’s. Even though they no longer work together, they stay in touch, and Cynthia hears from her regularly.Love never fails, my friends. If there are some difficult relationships where you work now, why don’t you ask God for your own Project Love idea, instead of giving up on those relationships.
Have you shared God’s love on the job lately? Sometimes it seems like the workplace is the last place we can talk about God or share our faith. Paul wrote to the Corinthian Christians that they were… a letter from Christ … written not with ink but with the Spirit of the living God, not on tablets of stone but on tablets of human hearts (2 Corinthians 3:3).We can be the word of the living God, a letter of love from Jesus to the people we work with, when we take time to let God’s love shine through us. I’ve given you six ideas on how to do that already this week. Here are numbers 7 and 8.7. SmileAre you aware your body language is louder than the words you speak? It’s true, and so we can send messages of love without saying a word. Smiling is surely one of the easiest and most effective ways to do that. All of us can smile; doesn’t cost a thing; doesn’t take any time. You just have to remember to do it.Proverbs reminds us a cheerful look brings joy to the heart (Proverbs 15:30.) Why don’t we work harder at smiling more? I’m not advocating phony, insincere smiles, but many of us just need to work at smiling more. We feel smiles on the inside, but don’t show them on our faces. That’s my problem, I know, so I really try to remember to smile more. You may have been born with a smile on your face, so it comes easy for you. But some of us need to remember to smile, because it brings joy to the heart, and it shares a little of God’s love with others.8. Do the “dirty work” sometimes, even if it’s not your job.There are always those things that need to be done in a workplace environment that nobody really wants to do. They aren’t in anyone’s job description. Things like cleaning the kitchen or making the coffee; cleaning up after a meeting or tidying up the general work area. In smaller workplaces, it might be taking out the trash or taking the mail to the post office.If you just do those things occasionally, without being asked and without grumbling, it would be a good way to show a loving, caring attitude toward the people you work with and for.Too often we think the only way we can witness for Jesus is through the words we say—quoting Scripture or giving our testimony or explaining the four spiritual laws. And frankly, there are not many opportunities on any given day to do that. But there are countless ways to show the love of God through our actions and our attitudes. But we must be intentional about it.
I’m offering ten suggestions for sharing God’s love where you work. If you missed the first four, you’ll find them on our website at christianworkingwoman.org. Now, here are suggestions five and six.5. Help others with their workload when you can.Maybe you have an assistant who helps you, and you know she or he is just overloaded with work at the moment. If you said, “Hey, I can stay an extra hour tonight and help get that done,” don’t you think that could really be an effective way to communicate God’s love? Or maybe you know a co-worker is struggling with a certain assignment. Maybe she doesn’t know how to get started. If you’ve got some experience or expertise that would help them, just stop what you’re doing and help them out.Obviously, you have your own work to do, which cannot be neglected, but there are times when stopping to help someone else is just the right, thoughtful thing to do.6. Look for opportunities to congratulate and compliment people any time you can.Think about it: aren’t there times in the day when you think something nice about someone, but you don’t express it? I try to make myself verbalize the compliments I think. For example, if you like the outfit someone is wearing, and think, “That looks nice on her,” then why not say it to her? If you think, “He did a great job on that,” why not say it? I think we would be more encouraging to others if we simply determined to verbalize the compliments we think.Also, look for ways to congratulate people on any accomplishment possible. “I noticed you stayed late last night and finished that job. Thanks.” “Your daughter made the Dean’s List this semester? Terrific!”There are so many little things we can do on any given day to show love and concern for others, to demonstrate we are thinking about someone beside ourselves. We live in a world that is pretty self-centered, but as servants of Jesus Christ, we are called to look not only to your own interest, but also to the interests of others, as we read in Philippians 2.These things we can do because we have the motivation of God’s Spirit within us, and the power he imparts to us, and believe me, God’s love will be felt as you intentionally seek ways to share God’s love on your job.
Have you ever had an opportunity to preach the gospel where you work? If you are in a secular workplace, I seriously doubt it! Then how can Christians effectively share God’s love where they work? I’m sharing ten suggestions anyone can do to become the Bible people read, the living Word of God on our jobs. Here are suggestions three and four.3. Go through your schedule for each day and pray for the people you know you will interact with.I know many of you are facing added stress and pressure from your jobs these days. There seems to be more workload for fewer people, and I hear from many of you that you’re expected to do more than you can get done in a day’s time. This kind of environment can easily cause interpersonal problems with coworkers.So, pray in advance for the people you will interact with on any given day. Remember, no one is in your life by accident, so even that difficult co-worker can be changed by God’s love. Ask God to give you wisdom in how best to deal with the difficult people on your job. Ask him to help you see them the way he sees them and to give you a loving attitude toward them. Remember, you don’t have to like someone to show them God’s love.Make it a daily practice to pray through your day before it starts, and you will discover God supplies strength and ideas and helps to get you through the day with a loving and kind attitude toward the people you encounter.4. Plan acts of kindness.And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful (2 Timothy 2:24).If you are a servant of Jesus Christ, your calling is to be kind to everyone—everyone! I think we have to remember to be kind, don’t you? You can just get so busy, trying to do your job and keep all your balls in the air, that you forget to do the kind things that matter to people. Here are two easy suggestions.Send cards at appropriate times. You could find out the birth dates of your coworkers, put them on your calendar, and then simply send a birthday card. Even an email card would be fine. It doesn’t have to be expensive.Celebrate significant events in the lives of co-workers—like promotions, graduations, or marriages and anniversaries. It doesn’t take much effort to bring in some goodies and have a small celebration, and it truly is meaningful. But you need to plan those acts of kindness and be intentional about them.
If you go to a secular workplace every day, you may wonder what in the world you can do in that kind of environment to share your faith in Jesus Christ, to really have an impact for the Gospel. This week I’m going to give you ten suggestions for sharing God’s love where you work. Set aside a certain time each day or week to pray for your workplace.I have discovered many Christians don’t really pray for their workplace. I think sometimes we separate our “secular jobs” from our spiritual life, as though the two have nothing in common. But for a Christian, everything should be sacred. We should all see ourselves in “full time Christian work,” and so our workplaces are, in effect, our mission field.What is the best way to pray for your workplace? First, pray for those in authority, for your relationship with them, for wisdom as they make decisions. Then pray for the success of the business, that God will bless the efforts of those working there. Pray for the morale of the workers, that there will be good working relationships, a good team atmosphere, conducive to good work. And then pray for whatever distressing or troubling situations you are experiencing. For example, if the company is experiencing a difficult economic situation, pray for new business, for creative marketing ideas, and so forth.I would encourage you to set aside a specific time to pray for your workplace, maybe on Mondays, so you have this programmed into your schedule, and you don’t overlook it. Take prayer walks through your company/organization/building, live or virtual.Now, this is a clandestine kind of prayer, not one you advertise or talk about. But it’s easy to do. If you’re working in your workplace, maybe you could take a lunch hour, say once a week, and walk through your company, up and down the various hallways and floors, inconspicuously, and quietly pray for each person and department as you walk by their office or place of work. Or if it’s a small workplace, you might walk around the building. Perhaps you might do this before work one day, when not too many people are around. This is an effective way to remember to pray for the people in your company, department, or division.Or if you work from home, pray through a list of the people who work in your company or division.Here are two things any of us can and should do to bring God’s love to our workplace. I truly believe you will be amazed to see how prayer can change things where you work.
This year, The Christian Working Woman celebrates 40 years of ministry to women in the workplace! Lisa Bishop has the pleasure of interviewing the woman who started it all—Mary Lowman. It's remarkable what God has done through one person who was simply willing to be used by God. Join as we recount the Lord’s faithfulness!
Presented by Lisa BishopIs there someone in your workplace who gets under your skin? Let’s wrap up with being grateful for that coworker who gets on your nerves.I know you are probably thinking I am crazy but stick with me. Who is someone at work you find yourself murmuring under your breath about? That person who raises your blood pressure, ignites your impatience, or causes you to complain in frustration.Did you ever consider God may have placed them there for your sanctification? The coworker who bugs you with their behavior can actually be a blessing.When we’re triggered by the behavior of others, Galatians 5 tells us that our flesh wants to react with hostility, quarreling, jealousy, selfish ambition, envy, and outbursts of anger.But the Holy Spirit who is living in you and me produces a different kind of fruit in our lives when we earnestly love and follow Jesus.He turns our fleshly response upside down and instead, as Galatians 5:22-23 says,But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23).So how is an annoying coworker a benefit? When a coworker puts you on edge consider you are being positioned for an upgrade in the fruit of the Spirit. What do I mean by that? When you are frustrated, ponder the possibility that God may want to use that situation for your sanctification.For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of (Matthew 12:34).We know Jesus wants us to become more and more like him and reflect his heart and he will place us in circumstances that show us where we need to grow in spiritual maturity.This is a very kind and loving thing for him to do because he wants to transform our hearts and minds so our words and actions are in alignment with who he created us to be—carriers and conduits of his love, grace, and mercy.Our lives are meant to be a witness to a different way of life, and when the fruit of the Holy Spirit is your go-to, others will see something different reflected in you.The next time you find your flesh ready to respond, ask the Holy Spirit to help you with a renewed response.When a coworker does that thing that used to bug you, stop and ask the Holy Spirit: How is this person the gateway to producing patience, kindness, or love in me?
Presented by Lisa BishopWe’re examining the importance of practicing thankfulness. Notice how I said practice! Being thankful is not necessarily something that comes easily to us. We tend to focus on what (or who) we want fixed. We need to proactively cultivate a mindset and habit of expressing gratitude.The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit (Proverbs 18:21).When we hear these verses, we can typically focus on what not to do, use our words to tear someone down, defame or smear their name with lies or gossip. But how often do we focus as much on what to do with our words? I want to use my words to breathe life into people, don’t you?We often miss multiple opportunities to express our gratitude at home and in the workplace. We can get wrapped up in busyness, be overly self-focused, or assume someone already knows we are grateful for them and miss the chance to encourage them.As you think about the people you work with, who is someone you can show genuine gratitude to?Tell a coworker you are thankful for the way he or she leads projects or a boss that you are thankful for his or her leadership. And how about that person who might rub you the wrong way and get on your nerves just a bit? I bet there is something you can find that you appreciate in them too. Expressing gratitude doesn’t cost you anything and in a dog-eat-dog world, where a lot of people are vying for position and credit, you will stand out in the crowd when you give sincere kudos to others. And how about encouraging fellow believers? One of my favorite verses is:Therefore encourage one another and build each other up as you are already doing (1 Thessalonians 5:11).As followers of Jesus, we are to encourage fellow believers in the faith, to comfort and edify each other in times of trials. To cheer each other on. Who is someone at church, in your Bible study, a leader, or a mentor you can intentionally encourage and build up with words of thankfulness?A few years ago, I was feeling a bit discouraged in my ministry. I wondered if what I was doing was making an impact. In God’s timing, I received a card in the mail the very next day. The front of the card said, “Thank you,” along with beautiful words to encourage me just at the right time. God knew what I needed, and he prompted this sweet woman to be his mouthpiece.God wants to use you to encourage people in your life. Who is he calling you to say a kind and life-giving word to? Ask him to show you, and then follow through.
Presented by Lisa BishopWe are examining being thankful and I want to talk about gratitude in the battle.2 Chronicles 20:1-30 tells the story of King Jehoshaphat, reminding us gratitude is not just a response to God's blessings. Gratitude is a proactive stance, a mind set on God that invites his presence and power into our lives.When a vast army of his enemies were coming to wage war against him, instead of succumbing to fear, Jehoshaphat, the king of Judah, sought the Lord.In verses 6-12, Jehoshaphat prayed a powerful prayer of dependence on God, acknowledged God's sovereignty, recounted God’s faithfulness, and confessed reliance on God for deliverance. His prayer ended with the profound declaration:We do not know what to do, but our eyes are on you (2 Chronicles 20:12).Have you ever felt like that? What stands out in this story is the response of Jehoshaphat and the people as they faced a battle. They didn’t cower in fear, get angry at their circumstances, or wait passively; while they waited for the battle to unfold, they worshipped. In the middle of the hard, they praised (v. 19). As they went out to face their enemies, they sang,Give thanks to the Lord, for his love endures forever (2 Chronicles 20:21).Their gratitude was not after the victory; it was before the battle even began. And as they began to sing and praise, their gratitude and worship moved the hand of God. The Lord set ambushes and defeated their enemies. Jehoshaphat and his people didn't have to fight; God fought for them.Praise and thankfulness are powerful weapons in our spiritual arsenal. When you are facing a battle, follow in Jehosaphat’s footsteps and remember these three things: Gratitude helps us fix our eyes on God's power rather than our problems. When Jehoshaphat and his people turned to give God thanks, their focus shifted from the overwhelming threat to the overwhelming greatness of God. Gratitude invites God's presence. As Judah worshiped, God's presence was tangibly manifested. Expressing gratitude invites God into our circumstances, bringing his peace, guidance, and intervention. Gratitude precedes victory. Jehoshaphat's story teaches us to thank God in advance. Gratitude is an expression of faith, trusting he is already at work, even when we can't see it.As we go about our week, rather than being overwhelmed by our challenges, let’s resolve to fix our eyes on Jesus, thank him for his enduring love, and trust he is fighting our battles. Remember, gratitude is not just a response to victory; it’s a catalyst for it.
Presented by Lisa BishopHow am I supposed to be grateful when life hands me lemons? How can I be thankful when life is hard? Have you ever asked yourself that?How can you be thankful when you are experiencing conflict at work or are overlooked for a promotion? When finances are tight, your dreams feel delayed, or when you have prayed that same prayer a million times, and your circumstances don’t seem to change? It may not be easy, but it is possible. God’s word instructs us to do more than just find the proverbial silver lining. God teaches us to be thankful in challenging circumstances because he has proven himself faithful even when life is hard.Philippians 4:6-7 are familiar verses we often quote, but do we let them instruct us when life is sour?Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:6-7).We often get the part about not being anxious, presenting our requests, and praying in every situation, but we tend to gloss over a key call to action—with thanksgiving.Why be thankful when hardships happen? Because when you are thankful in hard times, you are promised peace! Now let me just say we are not called to be thankful for all of life’s challenges that come our way per se, but to give thanks because we know God is working in our circumstances.And this is also not a call to pick yourself up by your bootstraps and muster up a pretense that everything is A-OK. You are allowed to lament when things go awry. Gratitude and being disgruntled can coexist. The key is not to let the grumbling overpower the gratitude. Get real with God but also remember his character. He is for you even if you don’t feel like it. Your feelings don’t always tell you the truth, only God’s Word is true and that is why you must renew your mind with the Word and pray with thanksgiving. As you pray and remember God’s steadfast love and faithfulness, the peace of God will guard your heart and mind in Christ.If you are facing a trial right now, I want to remind you to stand firm. God is with you and will not allow your needs to go unnoticed or unaddressed. It may be hard but keep your eyes open and your heart attuned to how he is working on your behalf, even in this very moment.Hang onto the truth of God’s Word to get you through hard times and be thankful.
Presented by Lisa BishopWould you consider yourself to be a thankful person? Let’s examine a topic that can transform your life—the undeniable power of a deep-seated posture of thankfulness.A few weeks ago, I was headed to a wedding where I knew parking would be a bit of a challenge. I pulled up an app on my phone that helps you find and pay for parking spots in advance. I found my assigned spot #26, parked my car, and headed to see my friend get married. A few hours later I walked outside to go home and, you guessed it, my car was nowhere to be found. I was stunned and a bit bewildered. At first, I thought my car had been stolen. Then it dawned on me. I was parked in the wrong lot, and as a result, my car was towed.As a side note, I have lived in Chicago for 27 years and have avoided this dreaded occurrence, but apparently, my lot was up. It was my turn to experience something I would not wish on anyone.You might be wondering what this has to do with thankfulness. I would be lying if I told you I was thankful my car got towed. That is far from the truth. But I will say, instead of having a total meltdown in my dress and high heels, I was able to take the higher ground of gratitude, finding things I could be thankful for in the moment. While I did feel like bursting into tears, I talked myself off the ledge, focused on what I could control, and did my best to release the rest.I kept calm and focused on what I could be grateful for even in the midst of an unpleasant situation: the Uber driver who took me to the tow lot and made sure I was safe, the fact that my car was not stolen and that I could afford the $240 fee to retrieve my vehicle.Did you know when you make it a practice to lead a lifestyle of thankfulness, it makes you more resilient? For the past two years during my quiet time, I have been recording what I am grateful for, and I believe it prepared me for this dreadful day.When daily stresses come your way, gratitude will help you be resilient in challenging times. Gratitude reverses that negative spiral we can all be prone to when life throws us curveballs. But you must be proactive in growing in gratitude to reap the benefits of resilience.My daily gratitude practice prepared me not to lose my cool and kept me grounded in God.Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus (1 Thessalonians 5:18).Gratitude takes practice like any other skill, and when you are thankful, you are living in God’s will.
For the most part, we live in a very ungrateful world. All around you can see examples of children being ungrateful for all their parents have done for them; workers not appreciating their jobs; Americans not appreciating the country they live in. Thankfulness seems to be in short supply.For many people, gratitude is difficult because life is difficult. For others, gratitude is just not on their radar at all. Life is all about them, and they think they deserve whatever good comes to them, so being thankful just doesn’t fit in with their attitudes. And others are not thankful because they simply take for granted the good things in their lives. They just never stop to say thanks.Do you remember this story from Luke 17:11-19:Now on his way to Jerusalem, Jesus traveled along the border between Samaria and Galilee. As he was going into a village, ten men who had leprosy met him. They stood at a distance and called out in a loud voice, “Jesus, Master, have pity on us!”When he saw them, he said, “Go, show yourselves to the priests.” And as they went, they were cleansed. One of them, when he saw he was healed, came back, praising God in a loud voice. He threw himself at Jesus’ feet and thanked him—and he was a Samaritan.Jesus asked, “Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine? Has no one returned to give praise to God except this foreigner?” Then he said to him, “Rise and go; your faith has made you well.”We read that story, and we shake our heads at those nine guys who never said thanks. What’s the matter with them? Jesus healed them of a horrible disease, and they don’t even bother to return and express their gratitude? And note that Jesus finds it baffling, too. “Was no one found to return and give praise to God except this foreigner?”, he asks. Just one guy, and he wasn’t even a fellow Jew.Why did nine go away without saying thanks? We aren’t told exactly why, but I can imagine they were so excited to be healed of leprosy that instead of thanking Jesus, they rushed right back into their lives, told their families they were healed, and picked up where they left off before their dreaded disease. It was all about them and the good news that they were healed. They just didn’t take the time or the effort to say thanks. They did not choose to be thankful.You see, being thankful and expressing it are choices you and I make each day. Rarely does a day pass that doesn’t offer you at least one thankful moment. But I wonder, how many of your days—and mine—begin and end without one word of thankfulness coming from our lips? Jesus said, A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of (Luke 6:45). If our lips are not speaking words of thanksgiving, it’s because our hearts are not full of thankfulness. We speak what is in our hearts.So, my challenge to you is to choose thankfulness every day. If you are a Christ-follower, this should be a no-brainer decision, because it is simply obeying the principles set down in God’s Word. Here are four examples, and there are many more:Colossians 2:6-7: So, then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live in him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness.Ephesians 5:19b-20: Sing and make music from your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.1 Thessalonians 5:18: Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.Psalm 100:4: Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name.So, I think we must conclude when we are truly ungrateful, either because life is hard, or we forget to be thankful, or we take our blessings for granted—whatever the reason may be—we are in disobe...
The Bible clearly teaches us to give thanks in all situations, to develop a heart of gratitude because it makes a huge difference in your growth as a follower of Jesus Christ. The more you have a spirit, a controlling attitude of gratitude for all the blessings in your life, beginning with Jesus, the more power you will have to do the good works you were put here to do, as we read in Ephesians 2:10.I have a suggestion I believe will put you on the path to becoming a more grateful person, a person whose first response to whatever happens in your day is to give thanks. I’m going to do this with you. I believe it would be a great help if we would keep a thankful journal—a book or a tablet of some kind—where we specifically name three things in that day we are thankful for.This is not a new idea. Many studies have been done in the secular world showing the power of gratitude. Once again, the world has unknowingly come to accept principles that are grounded in God’s truth. When you practice biblical principles, they work for your good even if you are not yet born again into God’s family.I have journaled in different ways through the years, but this is the first time I’ve committed to a daily, end-of-day thankful journal. And it so happens a dear friend just gave me a new journal—not a coincidence, if you ask me.Will you join me? I mean, how much trouble can it be? It’s really easy to do. Just jot down three things in each day that you are thankful for—or more. It could be a chocolate cake or a good report from your doctor or a call from a friend. Small or large, it shouldn’t be hard to name three things each day for which you are thankful and write them in your thankful journal. If you decide to do this with me, let me know, and please share your experience of how God is growing a heart of gratitude in you. It could be life-changing in many ways.
The power of gratitude. As I have been putting my thoughts together for this devotional, I’ve been amazed and inspired to realize how absolutely critical it is for us who claim Christ as our Savior to have hearts of gratitude. It’s even more important than I realized.
Someone has said thankfulness is the quickest path to joy. Joy is what we want and what we need because the joy of the Lord is our strength. Don’t you know the enemy of your soul wants to steal your joy because that weakens and sidelines you. It can happen so fast—before you realize it. How does it happen? You forget to be grateful, and you start a pity party, or you complain to someone, or you gripe in your own soul.
Gratitude and a complaining spirit don’t get along well. They cross each other out. When your heart is full of gratitude, that complaining spirit, that pity party just can’t take hold. But when you forget to do God’s clearly expressed will—to give thanks in all circumstances—then gratitude is canceled out by griping and complaining.
Gratitude has the power to give you joy no matter what. And that gratitude will cause you to fix your mind on all you have in Jesus. Jesus is the reason we can be and must be always grateful. This is how Peter put it:
Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy (1 Peter 1:8).
Inexpressible and glorious joy! Joy that does not yield to difficult circumstances, unhappy endings, unanswered prayers. True, gratitude is the quickest path to joy, and inexpressible and glorious joy is found in Jesus Christ—and in him alone. Go there when you’re tempted to be discouraged. As you express gratitude for Jesus, you will know this joy which can’t be expressed. Gratitude is very powerful.
Each year I choose a word to pray into my life for that year. My one word for this year is acceptance, and the verse I chose is 1 Timothy 6:6—godliness with contentment is great gain. I’m directing our thoughts to the power of gratitude—the incredible benefits we have as Christ-followers when we continually develop a heart of gratitude.
And acceptance is one of the great gains we receive. As I said before, gratitude is more than just being thankful for an event. It is thankfulness on steroids—taking thankfulness to the next level. When gratitude becomes a way of life, or an automatic response, it gives you the power to accept what’s coming your way.
Let’s face it: resistance comes far more naturally to us than acceptance. When life isn’t going the way you want it to, if you’re like me, your first reaction is focused on how to change it. And that often creates tons of stress and strife. We often hear and say, “Well, it is what it is,” right? And in a sense, that is the motto of acceptance—it is what it is.
Of course, that doesn’t mean we lay down and roll over when we need to do something, but life is full of so many situations we simply cannot control, cannot change, and must endure. We can do that with a heart of gratitude, accepting what we cannot change, or we can kick and complain and be miserable. Gratitude empowers you to accept what you cannot change and trust God’s promise to you.
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose (Romans 8:28).
When acceptance comes more easily for you, because of your heart of gratitude, it empowers you to take in what’s happening without needing to change or fix it. It is what it is. Focusing on being grateful allows you to quietly accept the moment and respond to it in a Christ-honoring way.
There is great power in gratitude.
I’m examining the power of gratitude—of being a consistently thankful and grateful person. What is the power of gratitude?
For one, gratitude empowers you to be content with who you are, where you are, and what you have. Someone has said gratitude turns what we have into enough. Think about that. When what you have is enough, you’re no longer envious, dissatisfied, or obsessed by the desire to have more. As you develop a heart of gratitude, always counting your blessings for what you have instead of dwelling on what’s missing, it brings contentment into your life.
The Apostle Paul wrote to young Timothy godliness with contentment is great gain (1 Timothy 6:6). This simple statement carries a real punch—a divine principle many Christians should take seriously, and that is contentment. The more you develop a heart of gratitude, the more contented you will be. And in this way—joining a godly lifestyle with true contentment—we gain so very much.
I find this is an on-going commitment for me, one that can easily get sidetracked with wanting more. Whenever we think getting something material, or getting more of it, will meet our needs, then we are not content. To develop a heart of gratitude means we recognize this flaming arrow our enemy will constantly throw at us—the arrow of discontent—and we choose to be thankful for what we have instead. A heart of gratitude turns what we have into enough.
Dietrich Bonhoeffer said, “It is only with gratitude that life becomes rich.” Godliness with contentment is great gain. It’s rich, and gratitude is the key to a contented life. The great gain we experience from a heart of gratitude has nothing to do with material things. Rather it’s all about the riches of a peaceful heart, a mind at rest, and the assurance of God’s presence and his never-ending love.
I encourage you to be very intentional about developing a heart of gratitude, being thankful no matter what, and continually dwelling on all you have to be thankful for. It’s a lot! And remember, the more you practice being thankful, the more you’ll have to be thankful for.
Have you ever thought about how powerful gratitude is? It has truly just begun to dawn on me that when I choose gratitude, when I am consistently thankful, I am amazingly empowered!
What do I mean? First, let’s define the difference between gratitude and thankfulness. In many ways they are the same, but gratitude is more powerful. Thankfulness is a response to an event—when something nice happens or someone does something for you—and you are thankful. You got a good review which led to a raise, and you are thankful. And of course, thankfulness is good.
Gratitude, on the other hand, is a culture you develop for yourself, and it has a positive effect on everyone in your circle of influence. Being grateful becomes a way of life, increasing over time. The frequency of thankfulness develops this attitude or culture of gratitude. So, focusing on being thankful in all circumstances leads you to an abiding attitude of gratitude. It becomes a way of life, an automatic reaction, a repetitive act that creates spiritual muscle memory.
Amazingly, God’s Word set this principle for us long before psychology caught on.
Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus (1 Thessalonians 5:18).
Always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ (Ephesians 5:20).
Paul wrote to the Colossians that they should sing to God with gratitude in their hearts (Colossians 3:16). Gratitude is a heart thing. Someone has said that gratitude is when memory is stored in the heart.
We have a ministry called The Hidden Word where we encourage you to memorize one verse per week. It is easy to do, and we help you. This month our theme is gratitude. You could join with us and develop this culture of gratitude for yourself—in your home, where you work. It is powerful; it can change the temperament and quality of your life, making an improved home life, a better workplace, a lovelier person in you, and all to the glory of God.
There is power in gratitude.
I’ve noticed some people are truly handicapped over the missing pieces in their lives. Whatever is not there—something hoped for but not realized—many become obsessed with it. It controls their thought life, and it keeps them from enjoying or appreciating the good things they do have. What about you? Would that be true of you?
I remember talking with a friend who has been married quite a few years and has always wanted children, but she has not been able to have her own. That’s a painful missing piece, and she was sharing the pain with me. But even though she recognizes an important piece is missing, she hastened to add: “But, Mary, I have so much to be thankful for. My life is still full and meaningful,” and she began to recite the good things—the pieces that are not missing from her life.
I said to her, “Do you realize how unusual you are? While you acknowledge a key piece is missing from your life, and is likely to always be missing, you are focused on what is not missing.” I’ve known her for many years, and I can tell you she has never moaned and groaned about this missing piece. While she has felt sorrow and pain over it, she accepts that no one has everything, and life is full of missing pieces.
Have the missing pieces of your life become so overwhelming you cannot see or appreciate what you do have? For ten years I allowed what I thought was a major missing piece in my life to control me. I felt I had to be married for life to be complete, so I was consumed with pursuing and finding the right person to marry. I’ve shared my testimony many times before of how that obsession with finding the missing piece led me away from the Lord, away from biblical principles, into a self-focused and sinful life.
What I’ve come to learn—and am still learning—is that instead of being controlled by the missing pieces, I can be thankful for them. If that sounds a little “too good to be true,” let me assure you I don’t live on another planet, and I have the same feelings and emotions and struggles as everyone else. And I emphasize I am learning this principle of being thankful for the missing pieces. But as I’ve started to grasp this truth, I’ve found such freedom and contentment.
I’d like to share a poem with you, which really helped me start down this road of being thankful for the missing pieces. I first read it several years ago, and I have it written in my prayer book as a reminder of this important biblical principle—to be thankful for the missing pieces. The poem uses old-fashioned words, but the truth is still very relevant:
An easy thing, O power Divine,
To thank Thee for these gifts of Thine!
For summer’s sunshine, winter’s snow,
For hearts that kindle, thoughts that glow;
But when shall I attain to this:
To thank Thee for the things I miss?
For all young fancy’s early gleams,
The dreamed-of joys that still are dreams,
Hopes unfulfilled, and pleasures known
Through others’ fortunes, not my own,
And blessings seen that are not given,
And ne’er will be – this side of heaven.
Had I, too, shared the joys I see,
Would there have been a heaven for me?
Could I have felt Thy presence near
Had I possessed what I held dear?
My deepest fortune, highest bliss,
Have grown, perchance, from things I miss.
Sometimes there comes an hour of calm;
Grief turns to blessing, pain to balm;
A Power that works above my will
Still leads me onward, upward still;
And then my heart attains to this:
To thank Thee for the things I miss.
-Thomas Wentworth Higginson[1]
When I first read this poem, I began to ask myself, “Where would you be today if you had everything you wanted, if there were no missing pieces in your life?” And it was as though God drew back a curtain to let me see how having everything I wanted could have been disastrous for me. Why? Because I might have been lulled into thinking I was self-sufficient, and I may have never seen my true needy state.
I recognized the missing piece had eventually driven me back to God, and as a result, God was able to take the brokenness of my life and use even me for his glory. I could see it was because of the missing piece that I now have this ministry and the joy of knowing that there is eternal purpose and meaning in my daily life. And I began, slowly, to thank God for that missing piece.
Now, let me assure you, God is not expecting us to celebrate the missing pieces—to leap for joy, to throw a party, to pretend it doesn’t hurt or matter. But he is asking us to be thankful even for the missing pieces, to understand the areas of emptiness and unfulfillment can become instruments of grace in our lives.
I’m sure you’ve heard these verses before, but we need to be reminded of what Paul wrote us concerning thankfulness:
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18: Rejoice always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.
Ephesians 5:19-20: Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.
Please remember the man who wrote these words had many missing pieces in his life. He was persecuted severely, put in prison, unable to go where he wanted to go; there were many things in his life that were not easy to swallow or understand. Yet, he still says we should give thanks in all circumstances.
If there is some key missing piece in your life right now, you may be thinking, “But I don’t feel like giving thanks for this missing piece.” Well, isn’t it great that Paul didn’t tell us we had to feel like it! In Hebrews 13:15 we read: Through Jesus, therefore, let us continually offer to God a sacrifice of praise—the fruit of lips that confess his name. When we don’t feel like being thankful, we can still offer a sacrifice of praise. A sacrifice of praise is, I believe, when we praise and thank God against all our feelings, despite our feelings.
How do you do that? You speak words of thankfulness and praise. Words are the fruit of your lips, and this verse in Hebrews tells us to use that fruit as a sacrifice of praise. It’s hard to do that, I know. You feel like a hypocrite when you start saying things you don’t feel, I know. But you are obeying biblical principles by offering a sacrifice of praise.
When I find myself in that predicament, I begin by telling the Lord I don’t feel like it. But I confirm I am offering these words of thanksgiving in obedience to Scripture, by faith not by feelings, and then I say those words of thanksgiving, even if they come through clenched teeth! God will honor our willingness to obey him; he will see our sacrifice of praise, and he will be pleased.
Interestingly, once I start to speak words of thankfulness for the missing pieces in my life, then the feelings usually follow. Although I may not feel happy about those missing pieces, I still can feel thankful, knowing that the God of all the universe is in control of my life and cares about me. And he has promised to turn my ashes into beauty.
You know, all of us have missing pieces in our lives; the issue is, how do you handle them? Several options are open to you:
You can become obsessed with what’s missing and devote all your energy and time to trying to find that missing piece, trying to get what you think is essential for your happiness and fulfillment. When that happens, you become a self-focused person, and if you notice, people who are self-focused are usually pretty miserable. And obviously, a self-centered attitude is sinful and harmful to your spiritual life.
You may become bitter and angry about the missing piece. Has that happened to you? Let me just briefly remind you that bitterness always backfires on us and turns us into unlovely and unhappy people. When you start to feel it’s unfair that you don’t have what others have and you’ve been dealt a rotten hand, then you’ve become bitter.
Or you learn to accept the missing piece and focus your life on what you do have and the good things God has done for you. Eventually you can even thank God for the missing piece because you realize you have come to know him better through it.
I can relate to all three reactions, because I’ve done them all. For ten years I was obsessed with my missing piece, and my whole life revolved around my desire to find what I thought was the key piece missing in my puzzle. Let me tell you, those were ten tough years. I had no peace and little contentment, and the happiness I occasionally found was temporary and unsatisfying. Often, I found myself feeling bitter and angry that others, seemingly less deserving, had what I wanted so badly, and it seemed so unfair to me.
But finally, I turned the missing piece over to the Lord, and what appeared so critical before, became a total side-line issue in my life, something I rarely thought about. Why? Because God gave me so many other things to fill up the space and has shown me that without that missing piece, I would never know him the way I do.
Jesus told Martha that only one thing was important in life, and Mary had chosen that one thing—to get to know Jesus better and better (Luke 10:42). When this piece of our life is in the right place, everything else comes into clear focus for us.
I can think of people I know right now who are dealing with the missing pieces of their lives in panic mode, desperately trying to find it. Others are bitter and angry at God because their lives are missing something they consider to be essential. But I can think of a few people who have simply turned over the missing pieces to God, accepted it from his hand, and focused their lives on getting to know him. I think of a man who has lost his eyesight and is now totally blind. He went through some years of anger, but now he will tell you it’s the best thing that could have happened to him. God has given him such a testimony and impact as he joyfully lives with that missing piece.
How are you dealing with the missing pieces in your life? Well, I want to encourage you to start learning to thank God for them. Maybe you need to meditate on what I’ve said, think about it further, and decide to be thankful, even for the missing pieces.
[1] Higginson, Thomas Wentworth. ‘The Things I Miss’.
Presented by Lauren Stibgen
We are going to look at the other definition of waiting: serving or being in attendance. An adjective. How is God calling you to “waiting” in action while you are in the waiting? I know this may sound funny, but waiting doesn’t mean you need to be stuck! God calls you to action as a follower of Jesus.
I have a list of reminders I call God’s to do list when I feel stuck. Often this is in the waiting. I am seeking his wisdom or discernment, or I find myself waiting for other things we have already discussed. My reminders include: love, work as to him, be in his Word, pray, reflect and observe, repent, and give gratitude. This is not an exhaustive list, but it is a biblical list of how God calls us to action—not only in the waiting but in our everyday life as followers of Jesus Christ. In the waiting we are called to love!
But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked (Luke 6:35).
Sometimes we are waiting because of conflict—here we are called to love those we are in turmoil with.
In the waiting we are called to work!
Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving (Colossians 3:23-24).
If you are waiting for that new job, a promotion or the raise, fix your work on the Lord! In the waiting, be in the word and pray and praise!
Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18).
In all circumstances, even in the waiting, we need to pray and rejoice! In the waiting God calls us to repent.
Whoever conceals their sins does not prosper, but the one who confesses and renounces them finds mercy (Proverbs 28:13).
God is calling you to action in the waiting. How are you loving others? Are you in God’s Word? Are you praying in the waiting? What do you need to repent of in the waiting? Maybe feelings that are contrary to what God is wanting you to feel.
Waiting doesn’t need to keep you stuck! You can still be active in the waiting. Pray God changes your heart to what he has for you in this season.
Presented by Lauren Stibgen
While women in the Bible waited, they also experienced a result—in God’s time. There are other women who waited in the Bible, and although we don’t always receive a depiction of their feelings, we can step into their shoes for a moment and imagine how they would feel. One of the most overlooked stories of waiting is in the book of Luke.
And a woman was there who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years, but no one could heal her. She came up behind him and touched the edge of his cloak, and immediately her bleeding stopped.
“Who touched me?” Jesus asked.
When they all denied it, Peter said, “Master, the people are crowding and pressing against you.”
But Jesus said, “Someone touched me; I know that power has gone out from me.”
Then the woman, seeing that she could not go unnoticed, came trembling and fell at his feet. In the presence of all the people, she told why she had touched him and how she had been instantly healed. Then he said to her, “Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace” (Luke 8:43-48).
Let’s consider this woman—she bled for 12 years. Her physical health was ailing. She was likely very uncomfortable and tired.
She spent all her savings on physicians. We don’t know if she was well off, but we do know she was experiencing financial hardship due to her condition. Was she fearful? Anxious?
In her time, this condition was considered unclean. She could not worship in the temple. It is likely she could not marry and was not around other family. She was isolated. Was she sad, angry, lonely, hopeless?
What we do know is she had great faith. She knew Jesus was a great healer, and he was compassionate. Jesus would not care that she was touching him, while others had deemed her unclean. To Jesus, she was perfect and loved as his child.
In her healing, let’s now imagine her feelings. Joy, relief, gratitude? While we don’t know about what she did next, one can imagine her praise for how God had delivered her from her struggles.
When God delivers you from the waiting, how do you respond? Are you giving him glory and praise? Earlier this week we talked about waiting as a noun. But waiting can also be an adjective, meaning, we can be active in our waiting!
Presented by Lauren Stibgen
Being a faithful follower of Jesus Christ by no means makes us perfect in any way. In Romans 7 verses 18-20, Paul sums it up well.
For I know that good itself does not dwell in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it (Romans 7:18-20).
These verses above summarize the fact that even though I follow Jesus, I am still prone to sin. Often, we can see this sin in the feelings that manifest in the waiting. But what we forget is God’s timing is perfect, not ours.
This week, I defined the feelings we experience in waiting and the questions we ask God a result of the difference between what we think is a reasonable time for an answer or result and the time it takes to actually happen—even if it does happen. It is very easy for us to forget how great God is. When I say great, I am not necessarily talking about his goodness, but rather his omniscience, omnipotence, and omnipresence. All knowing, all powerful, and all present. God is everywhere, in everything at all times—even right now. God transcends any temporal and worldly notions we have of time.
A thousand years in your sight are like a day that has just gone by, or like a watch in the night (Psalm 90:4).
But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day (2 Peter 3:8).
These two verses capture how limited we are in our thinking of how God experiences time.
Ecclesiastes 3:11 is my favorite about God’s timing.
He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end (Ecclesiastes 3:11).
God makes everything beautiful in its time. And what is more beautiful is he gives us eternity with him through Christ Jesus. This good word reminds us we cannot fathom all he does!
The implications of waiting are this. God’s timing in all things is perfect and, in our waiting, we need to remember this.
Presented by Lauren Stibgen
Yesterday we talked about how the simple noun, waiting, can cause us to ask God some hard questions. We experience feelings about a period of waiting when something doesn’t happen in the amount of time we have assigned in our minds that seems reasonable.
This waiting can lead to many different feelings. The challenge with these feelings is they can lead to other actions which may not lead to the best outcome for us.
Think about becoming impatient for an answer you are waiting for. This impatience starts to brew and bubbles into anger. We have all been there. Thinking about why someone hasn’t called back or gotten back to you. Maybe your foot is tapping, or you are pacing in your office. Finally, you erupt and in that angry moment you call and accuse the other party of stalling. Silence is on the other end of the line. The person hadn’t called back because they were sick.
Now think about waiting for a call from a recruiter for a job you not only want, but desperately need. The waiting is making you anxious. You are fearful someone else will get the job, and you won’t have enough financial provision for your family.
You have a disagreement with someone at work, and you are waiting for the right moment to apologize. You are overburdened with the feelings associated with this needed apology.
After waiting for feedback from a job interview you find out you have been passed over for a promotion. You feel worthless and lack hope because you heard through the grapevine and not the hiring manager for the job.
All your closest friends are married. You are still waiting to find love. You find yourself feeling lonely and sad. Impatient, angry, anxious, fearful, overburdened, worthless, hopeless, lonely and sad. Heavy emotions. God offers us an opportunity for other feelings in the waiting.
Loved:
Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love (1 John 4:8).
Hopeful:
There is surely a future hope for you, and your hope will not be cut off (Proverbs 23:18).
Patient:
Whoever is patient has great understanding, but one who is quick tempered displays folly (Proverbs 14:29).
Calm/Peaceful:
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid (John 14:27).
We have all had feelings that the Lord hasn’t dealt with us fairly or answered us in our time, but he does offer us other ways to feel if we are abiding with him in the Word.
Presented by Lauren Stibgen
Are you waiting for something? Waiting is defined as a period of pause, interval, or delay. A noun. What are some of the things we wait for? As working women, the complexity of this list can span far beyond your day-to-day job. Waiting can be professional, but it can also be deeply personal.
At work maybe you are waiting for a promotion or a raise or even recognition and reward for a job well done. Personally, you may be waiting for health or healing, children, friendship, marriage, love, a new home, or other provision. Is it waiting to be reunited? Or reconciliation? Do you need an apology or are you waiting to give one? This list is not exhaustive.
One of the ways I reassure myself during times of waiting is in knowing I am not alone. We all experience times of waiting. Often the Bible describes this waiting as a period in the wilderness or a valley. These words, wilderness and valley seem big, deep, maybe dark, and like you may be losing your way. It can bring us to ask questions of God. The words in Psalm 77:7-9 that Asaph writes resonate:
Will the Lord reject forever?
Will he never show his favor again?
Has his unfailing love vanished forever?
Has his promise failed for all time?
Has God forgotten to be merciful?
Has he in anger withheld his compassion (Psalm 77:7-9)?
This interval or delay can be as short as hours or as long as years. It’s really just any amount of time that exceeds what we have deemed as reasonable in our own mind. It is a period of time we have asked and not received, sought an answer and haven’t found it, and knocked on a door that has not yet been answered like we are told to do in Matthew 7:7-8.
When that “acceptable time passes”, our questions start.
The good news is there is another side of waiting we will talk about this week, because waiting isn’t only a noun.
Presented by Lauren StibgenWhat are some different things we wait for when it comes to our career or work? Or does our career or work cause us to feel like we are waiting on other aspects of our life? Honestly, after being in prayer for about two years with other female executives, I can say that waiting and work impact us personally and professionally.For women who are just starting out in the workforce, this waiting can be for a first job. A recent article in Forbes online[1] noted that two of five recent graduates do not feel their college or university properly prepared them for their transition to work. In addition to this perceived lack of preparation, employers are also biased about hiring recent college grads. Statistically, 50% of hiring managers at a supervisory level and above feel this group of candidates is not adequately prepared for the workforce. The pandemic only compounded the issues recent classes are experiencing when trying to obtain a position. And they find themselves waiting—not only for a job but simply for an interview. With this age group already feeling the impact of isolation from the pandemic, the added stressors of finding a postgraduate position can lead to discouragement.As “an older saint”, as a Gospel Coalition article[2] might deem me, my role in helping these younger believers in their waiting is critical. Simply networking and providing mentorship can help encourage and connect graduates to new opportunities. It is also important to point them to encouragement in God’s Word. How many young followers of God waited for their job?King David’s first job was that of a lowly sheep herder. His father didn’t even invite him to the dinner that was called when Samuel was sent by the Lord to anoint a new king for Israel. Even after he was anointed, David continued to tend the sheep, and was a musician for Saul. He had some odd jobs as we might say, until he finally became king. Along the way he sought encouragement from the Lord but also in dear counsel from people like Samuel and Jonathan.While recent graduates are experiencing a hard time landing a first position, there are many women in transition at a senior level as well. In many of the calls I have with other female executives, we call ourselves “the middle”. We deal with the real pressures of work while also raising children and maybe managing aging parents. Not to mention, we may have our own health issues.Using the word transition for this group of women in the workforce takes a different shape. It doesn’t just mean they are unemployed seeking employment. This transition may also look like stepping down from a leadership position, starting their own business, or looking for a promotion. In addition, many women are experiencing ageism at work. Statistically, more older women are being forced out of the workforce than men. Some research states that women are 50% more likely to experience ageism at work than their male counterparts. Working women who have been waiting for that more senior role or promotion or who may be seeking new employment are faced with a particular worldview. This worldview is described in an article by The Kit[3] as one that made them feel “diminished, devalued, demeaned.” The article from March of 2023 also says, “For every career win for a woman over 50, there are countless humiliating losses. Some play out publicly, like when CNN morning show host Don Lemon declared U.S. presidential candidate Nikki Haley past her prime at 51.” For our listeners today, I would tell you I am encroaching on 50, and see so many vibrant, working women with successful careers well past 50. However, if we don’t look at the reality of how ageism can cause waiting, or even unemployment, we can’t even start to address the issue. As Christian working women, we too can experience ageism in a secular workforce. Just this week one of the women in my prayer group told us she struggles believing in her worthiness as sh...
Wise Solomon wrote,Catch for us the foxes, the little foxes that ruin the vineyards, our vineyards that are in bloom (Song of Songs 2:15).What are the little foxes that ruin your days and attitudes and rob you of joy and peace? We’ve looked at four of these little foxes this week: hurt feelings, petty fears, worrying, and false guilt. The final one today is the fear of trusting God.I spent many years “doing my own thing,” as we say, not obedient to God’s voice in my life. As I look back on that time, I now recognize the underlying problem as a fear of trusting God with control of my life. I was actually fearful of allowing the God of the universe to run my show. How I could have been so stupid for so long?Are you hanging on to the controls of your life, afraid to trust God, as if to say you know what’s better for you than God does? Of course, you don’t think those thoughts; I didn’t either. I just lived my life that way. Maybe you are, too. If you have been fearful of trusting God, I pray you will recognize it and see how foolish and sinful it is to fear trusting God.I remember well the sleepless night when I finally said, “God, I’ll trust you.” It became clear to me he couldn’t possibly do a worse job at running my life than I was doing! That was the beginning of learning to trust God. In the intervening years, I have learned to trust him more and more, and know the joy and peace of his fellowship. And I testify to you today that God is trustworthy.The fear of trusting God is not such a little fox that ruins our lives. It is a big one, and I pray you’ll determine to get to know God better and better, because when you do, you will trust him and you’ll gladly let go of the controls to a God with all power, who loves you and wants only the best for you.
What is false guilt? Do you know how to recognize it? I’m talking about the little foxes that can ruin our attitudes and cause harm to our Christian witness. And pretty high on that list for many of us is false guilt.False guilt is a guilt we impose upon ourselves. We allow it to take root in our minds, to start causing all kinds of bad feelings, to feed us all kinds of lies, which we begin to believe. Here are some examples of it: What we feel when we keep remembering what God has forgiven and forgotten! What we feel when someone appears to be disappointed in us. What we feel when we have to say no. What we feel when we try to please people and fail. What we feel when we allow others to dictate what and who we should be. What we feel when we are unfairly accused of something.And believe me, there are many more. Notice each one begins with what we feel. It’s a feeling—not grounded in truth—but nonetheless strong and real. One of the first signs you are dealing with false guilt is you can’t seem to pinpoint exactly why you feel guilty. If you had to state why you feel guilty, you’d say things like, “Well, I just never seem to get it right,” or “She’s always telling me that I need to improve” or “I just can’t seem to make anyone happy.”Perhaps the false guilt we suffer from the most is guilt over our past. We tend to go back and remember the sins of the past, and even though they are forgiven, and God remembers them no longer, we don’t seem to be able to purge our memory. Is that true of you?The first and most important step in learning to manage false guilt is to recognize it as false. The second step is to replace wrong thinking with right thinking. You start praising the Lord, singing a good song, or reciting all your blessings. Refuse to allow the thoughts of false guilt to have a place in your mind. And the more you do this, the less false guilt you’ll have to deal with. You can have victory over this little fox through prayer and bringing your thoughts under control. Life is so much nicer when you get rid of false guilt.
I’m sure you recognize the most useless and unproductive thing most of us do very often is to worry, and yet we worry. I’m talking about the little things—the little foxes—that often steal our joy and make us miserable.How do we let go of worrying? Is it really possible to come to a place where we truly don’t waste time worrying? After all, life is full of worrying things, and are we supposed to be cavalier and nonchalant, as though those things don’t bother us at all?Jesus fully understands our propensity to worry, and he addressed it strongly in his Sermon on the Mount. Basically, he said don’t worry about your life—what you eat, what you wear, or where you will live—because your heavenly Father promises to provide what you need. Jesus said,Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself (Matthew 6:34).Worrying is totally worthless, but even more than that, worrying is faithless! I just don’t think we often put worry into the category of sin, do we? We worry and worry and never think to apologize to God and repent of this sin of worrying. Paul wrote,Everything that does not come from faith is sin (Romans 14:23b).Worrying does not come from faith. Therefore, continually worrying about anything is a sin. Worrying can become addictive. You can get into such a rut of worrying that you are in worry mode most all the time. If you truly want to get over worrying, the first thing you need to do is to confess your worrying sins. What do you worry about most? Here are some common ones: Paying the bills Finding a cure for a health issue Finding a job Finding a mate Trying to control something or someone How to control your children/mate/siblings/parents How will you be able to retireWhat is on your list? I encourage you to ask God to forgive you for anything you worry about and be specific. As you learn you can, by God’s grace, get rid of that little fox, it will encourage you to continue to let go of worrying.
What are the little foxes that are ruining your joy and causing you pain? I’m focusing on the small hurtful things that we allow to ruin our days and steal our joy. Solomon wrote:Catch for us the foxes, the little foxes that ruin the vineyards, our vineyards that are in bloom (Song of Songs 2:15).We want to catch those little foxes and get them out of our lives. Now we know fear is one of the enemy’s favorite weapons and we are all vulnerable to what I call “petty fears.” Let’s address a few of those smaller ones, those joy-stealing fears that are truly unnecessary.Fear of a Dreaded Outcome: These are the fears that something bad just might happen, so to avoid that possibility we limit our activities and set unnecessary boundaries in our lives. These fears interfere with your everyday life, limit where you go and what you do, and can keep you from experiences that are often enriching and delightful.Fear of Change: “That’s the way we’ve always done it” can be a verbal cover-up for petty fear. Change can truly bring petty fears out of the closet!And there are lots more. Getting over petty fears doesn’t mean you get rid of the emotion that accompanies these fears. It means you go forward despite them: You get on that airplane with your knees knocking, but you get on. You say, “Sure, I’ll try” when asked to step out of your comfort zone. You agree to a change in procedures, even though you wonder how you’ll ever learn that new software.Once you take a first courageous step to overcome a fear, you begin to see new avenues of interest, new opportunities, and things to learn and do that were hidden to you before. And conquering fear in one area gives you strength to tackle other areas of fear.Other petty fears can plague us, so if you recognize a little fox you need to get rid of, like everything else, it is done through prayer and God’s Word.
There is a verse in Song of Songs that I want to consider this week:Catch for us the foxes, the little foxes that ruin the vineyards, our vineyards that are in bloom (Song of Songs 2:15).I want to talk about the “little foxes” in our lives—the things that may seem insignificant when in reality they are stealing our joy and keeping us from God’s peace. For example, harboring hurt feelings is a common “little fox” that is very harmful.Why do we hang on to hurt feelings so long, since we heap unhappiness on our own heads? We certainly don’t get any revenge on our offenders by hanging on to hurt feelings. If you think a pity party will relieve some of your hurt, think again! The more you feel sorry for yourself, the more you will try to find comfort in self-pity—it’s a vicious cycle that never works!Years ago, God began to reveal to me how hooked I was on pity parties. And for the first time I realized God sees it as a sin. Whether you or I have a legitimate complaint, wallowing in self-pity, nurturing our hurt feelings is simply wrong.I recognize some hurts may indeed require some time and help for healing. But just think about the little things that hurt your feelings in your everyday life. Like when a person ignores you, a friend speaks to you in an unfriendly way, a relative didn’t call when she knew you were not feeling well, when your boss didn’t give you credit for an important project, or your husband didn’t notice your new hairdo. These are all little foxes that ruin your attitude and steal your joy.How do you let go of these little foxes? Well, the hurt is in your mind, your thoughts, so you have to bring those hurtful thoughts into captivity, as the Bible says, and refuse to let your thoughts go there. Replace those thoughts with good ones—thankful thoughts, praising thoughts.Easily hurt feelings produce pity parties, and they are pitiful. If this is one of your little foxes, make it a matter of regular prayer and allow the Holy Spirit to remind you to think about good things and not those little hurt feelings you tend to nurture.
No doubt where I am in this stage of life has something to do with my focus on the future rather than the past. My future is shorter than my past. I’ve probably lived two-thirds or three-quarters of my life—or maybe much more. No one knows the number of her days except God. But I’m confident that my number of days remaining on this earth is less than the number I’ve lived already—unless God chooses to make me the oldest woman alive or something like that!Maybe, like me, you’re coming to grips with the reality that you’re facing a shorter future than you would like. Perhaps you’re facing a future as a single person, or so it seems, and you are fearful of not having a companion or mate. Your unknown could be some health issues that are worrying you, or some job issues. What is it about your future that concerns you?I am not a strategic thinker. I just try to keep my head above water and get done what needs to be done each day. So, it’s not my nature to think about what life will be like in five years or ten years or twenty years. I’ve had more or less the idea that things will always be the way they are, and I’ll keep going forever. One of my favorite comebacks is “age is only a number,” meaning don’t think about it. Just keep going for Jesus.I’m glad God made me that way, and I fully intend to keep going for Jesus. But as the number of years has continued to pile up, and as I’ve watched others even younger than me face death, and as my knee hurts sometimes, and my hair gets thinner and I forget things I never used to forget, I can no longer ignore the reality that I won’t live forever. There is no guarantee that I’ll even be here tomorrow. And furthermore, it’s mostly out of my control.And that kind of thinking can rob my peace very easily. It’s the kind of mild depression that you don’t share with anyone very much, but it’s there. I don’t know what the future holds; I don’t know the number of my days, and when I allow my mind to go to the unknowns, my peace doesn’t flow like a river.So, what do I mean by making peace with your future? I’m talking about making peace with the unknown. Becoming comfortable not knowing. And no matter what stage of life you are now in—no matter how many days are left for you on this earth—we all share a common discomfort about our future, do we not? I think it’s safe to say we all harbor some fear of the future.For many of us, living in the unknown often can feel worse than receiving actual bad news. At least we know what the bad news is. But wondering when “the other shoe will fall,” letting your mind conjure up all kinds of possibilities of what the future might hold, can steal your peace faster than anything else.Here’s the thing: You might as well make peace with your future since no amount of fear or discomfort or anxiety or your need to conquer the unknown will change the fact that the unknown is exactly that—unknown and unknowable. No person, no test, no new scientific discovery can cure you of “Unknownaphobia”!Have you caught that disease—Unknownaphobia? Do you need to make peace with your future—peace with the unknown? Well, let me give you a few suggestions—things that have helped me make peace with my future.Learn to Live in TodayJesus gave us this advice:Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own (Matthew 6:34).Jesus gives us the grace to handle today—not yesterday or tomorrow, just today. Unknownaphobia is a result of worrying about tomorrow—that’s the root cause. Why don’t you memorize this verse and just quote it to yourself several times a day. Mary, don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.You’re thinking “But it’s not that simple.” Yes, it is. Simple—not easy—but simple. You must apply God’s Word, God’s truth to what you’re facing—right then at the moment you’re going through it.
Presented by Lisa BishopI want to examine the blessing of waiting on God. I know waiting and blessing may not seem like they go hand in hand, but they often do. It’s our perspective that can blind us to seeing the blessing. We live in a fast-paced world where instant gratification is the norm. Fast is at our fingertips. Yet, as followers of Jesus, our spiritual journey often requires us to wait, and waiting can test our patience, reveal our faith, and tamper with our trust in God.But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; they will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary; they will walk and not be faint (Isaiah 40:31).This verse is a powerful reminder that waiting on God is not passive. It is an intentional and active engagement of our faith. Isaiah teaches us it’s actually in the waiting God renews our strength, gives us endurance, and prepares us for the journey ahead. Waiting builds resilient faith because we acknowledge the sovereignty and timing when we wait on God, admitting his plans are higher than ours and his understanding surpasses our own. This act of surrender is crucial for our spiritual growth. It's easy to rush ahead and try to force our plans, but God’s timing is perfect. He sees the bigger picture we cannot see. He knows what you need and when you need it.The story of Abraham and Sarah is an example of waiting. God promised them a son, but they had to wait 25 years for Isaac’s birth. Their time of waiting wasn’t without struggle and doubt, yet God deepened their faith as they relied on him. When you find yourself in a season of waiting it’s important to stay connected to God through prayer, Scripture, and worship. Sometimes that is the last thing we want to do because waiting can cause our hearts to grow weary toward God. Waiting involves an expectant hope, trusting God will come through at the right moment.Waiting is also a time for preparation. God might be preparing your heart for something greater, something you’re not ready for just quite yet.If we let it, waiting on God brings us closer to him. In our desperation and dependence, we draw near to the heart of the Father. We learn to lean on him, to trust him, and to love him more deeply.So, if you find yourself in a season of waiting, be encouraged. God is with you. He has not forgotten you. Use this time to strengthen your faith, grow your relationship with him, and prepare for the good things he has in store.
Presented by Lisa BishopWhat do you radiate while you wait? When you find yourself waiting on God to come through, what is your attitude? We’ll examine how we carry ourselves when we are counting on God to come through.It is not easy to maintain a good attitude in times of waiting. We may start to complain, get impatient, grumpy, angry, jealous, or even resentful.What is your demeanor when you have to wait? No matter what it is you are waiting on God for, it’s easy to have a negative disposition and the enemy will do his best to discourage you by getting your focus off God and fixed on the very thing you do not have.But we can’t allow the devil to take us on a downward spiral of negative thoughts or emotions. The feelings that come with waiting will be real but when they arise, we need to bring them all to God. Talk to him and be honest about your frustration, your worry, doubt, fear, or resentment. After all, he already knows our hearts anyway.Scripture teaches us to remain hopeful in our times of waiting. Hope, by definition, has the connotation of waiting. It is an expectation of something to happen. We can put our hope in a lot of things, but as Christians ultimately our hope is in Christ. We can always count on him to come through at his appointed time.Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:6-7).Don’t let your feelings fool you and pull you into a negative spin cycle. I know it is easier said than done, but focus on the faithfulness of God so you can radiate the spiritual fruit of patience, peace, joy, and faithfulness as you wait.Waiting is hard but wouldn’t you rather look back on this time knowing you didn’t get sucked into complaining but instead you practiced reigning in your thoughts and attitudes? Plus, our attitudes leak onto the people around us. We’ve all been around people who cannot seem to regulate their emotions when things don’t go their way. This doesn’t mean you aren’t allowed to feel moments of impatience, disappointment, or dismay, but as a follower of Jesus, we are called to have faith as we wait. If you find yourself waiting on God to move on your behalf, how can you focus on giving off a grateful glow because you know God is faithful as you wait? It may not be easy, but it will be worth it.
Presented by Lisa BishopI want to remind you being patient with God’s timing is worth the wait.About five years into my faith journey, I was desperately seeking answers to what I should do with my life. At that time, I was in a corporate job I could do and do well, but it wasn’t super fulfilling. I distinctly remember sitting in my living room talking to God saying, “God, I would really love to have a job where I get to do life with women, pouring into their faith and coming alongside them in every aspect of life.” Well, let’s just say that prayer was not answered until seven years later when “out of the blue,” I received a call from the church I had been a member of for 12 years. They created a new position for a director of women’s small groups, and they wanted me to apply.Now you may think I am crazy, but I didn’t initially see this opportunity as an answer to the prayer I had prayed seven years prior. It didn’t look like what I thought it would, which is a story for another day. But after several weeks of prayer, I accepted the role. There are a couple things I want to point out in my story I hope will encourage you in the waiting.The first is this: God does not always answer your prayers on your timeline. I know it is hard to hear. Especially if you have been waiting for quite some time. But God sees the full picture, and you don’t. While it may seem unfair, God is the one who is aware of what you need and when you need it. His timing is perfect.The second is this. Don’t squander the time in the waiting. While my job in the corporate arena left gaps in me feeling content, I intentionally looked for ways to invest my time outside of work that were life-giving. And one of those ways was by getting deeply involved in serving at my church. Serving not only allowed me to use my gifts, but it also positioned me to practice ministry and build trust and credibility with church leadership, which ultimately resulted in being offered a full-time ministry position. All too often we can be so focused on what we want things to look like we miss God’s provision in the meantime. How might God be calling you to invest your time as you wait?The final thing I want to mention is you will not always get what you pray for. God answers all our prayers but the way he provides may be very different from your vision of his provision. This is where determining to trust the Lord comes into play.The answer to your prayers may not look like you thought but as Proverbs 3:5-6 reminds us,Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him and he will make your paths straight (Proverbs 3:5-6).God’s timing is worth the wait.
Presented by Lisa BishopWhat is something you are currently waiting for? Whether you’re waiting for a job, vindication for an injustice, or a prodigal kid to come home, what you focus on when you wait matters.In Psalm 25:5, King David is in the midst of waiting for deliverance from his enemies when he cries out, guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long.We’re not sure of David’s exact circumstances when he penned this plea to the Lord. While David is known for finding himself in sticky situations and long periods of waiting, one thing we see throughout the book of Psalms is how he waited on the Lord.The origin of the word wait in Psalm 25 means to look for, to expect, to eagerly wait for, to bind together by twisting, be strong and robust, to stretch. You will be stretched in the waiting.One commentary says the picture of binding and twisting is one of being intertwined with God in the midst of the waiting. In the waiting, there is the tension of enduring, of remaining, of relying on and depending on Jesus.In the opening lines of David’s prayer, we see the disposition of his heart as he opens with this powerful decree,In you, Lord my God, I put my trust. I trust in you; do not let me be put to shame, nor let my enemies triumph over me. No one who hopes in you will ever be put to shame, but shame will come on those who are treacherous without cause (Psalm 25: 1-3).David was intentional about his focus on God as he waited.Psalm 25 is said to be “(It is) a wonderful display of the heart of a well-taught believer in a season of crisis” (The Enduring Word commentary).[1]I’m not sure what you are waiting for, but as you wait, who are you fixing your eyes on? In the waiting, it is our responsibility to train our minds, our hearts, and our thoughts to remember the character of God. And when our faith feels like it is flailing, to remember God’s faithfulness, preach the truth to ourselves and praise him. We can easily find ourselves focusing on pain or fear and forgo the reliance on God that waiting can produce. There is training and a forging of our faith as we grow in maturity in the wait.As David ends his song to God, he makes one final request: May integrity and uprightness preserve me, for I wait for you (Psalm 25:21). Let’s make our petition to God, the author, and perfecter of our faith as we wait.[1] Guzik, D. (2019, July 2). David Guzik Bible Commentary on Enduring Word. Enduring Word. https://enduringword.com/
Presented by Lisa Bishop
Have you ever felt wronged by someone at work? Maybe you are in the midst of a challenging situation right now. A coworker taking credit for something you poured your heart and soul into and now they are getting the kudos instead of you. Maybe you’ve been poorly treated, pushed aside for a promotion, or flat-out lied about. How do you react when your circumstances seem unfair?
Several years ago, I worked for an organization that was riddled with gossip and a few toxic personalities that made a huge impact on the culture. At one point I found myself being the target of gossip, and needless to say, I was sad, disappointed, and mad. Instead of responding in anger, I brought it to the Lord and asked him for wisdom. I prayed for insight and trusted he would guide me on how to respond and ultimately, he would make things right.
Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. On the contrary: “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil but overcome evil with good (Romans 12:17-21).
It can be tempting to launch a counterattack when you feel mistreated or maligned, but as followers of Jesus, in the midst of trying times, we are called to a higher way of being. You and I are called to wait; don’t retaliate.
Now does this mean we should never speak up when we are mistreated? No. There are times when we need to address issues with grace, tact, and humility. The point is, it can be so enticing to fight back and let our emotions flare up, to dream up ways to get even. But when you are treated wrongly, keep in mind the world around you is watching. Through your self-restraint, fueled by faith that God sees and works on your behalf, the glory of God will be put on display and show people a better way.
The next time you find yourself wanting to react in the heat of the moment, take a deep breath and ground yourself in the Lord. Develop the habit of responding rightly when you are wronged. Wait, don’t retaliate.
Presented by Lisa Bishop
Before we dive in, I have a question for you. How are you? Really, how are you doing? How is your faith in Jesus these days? There is a lot going on in the world and there may even be a lot happening in your life right now. You might find yourself in a sweet season with the Lord. You may be going through a rough patch in your faith, in one of your darkest seasons, or somewhere in between. I pray you know you are not alone.
I don’t think we talk about our struggles enough. We can maintain a code of silence when life is hard or our faith wavers because we are afraid of what people will say. We wonder, “Will they think I’m not a good enough Christian if I share I am struggling?” “Will I be shunned if I am doubting or weary?” And so, we silently suffer, and our faith can suffer even more. In our silence, we run the risk of reaching a point where we isolate and withdraw from community. No matter where you are and how strong, or weak your faith is, I pray that today encourages you.
In my quiet time I’ve been reading through the book of Psalms. The Psalms are a collection of prayers, songs, and praises to God. They are filled with raw honesty as they catalog the Psalmist’s highs and lows of life, along with laments, longings, unwelcome circumstances, and crying out in long seasons of waiting. Waiting can sometimes lead to feelings of frustration and doubt. When answers don’t come, we might start questioning God’s goodness or presence. The Psalms remind us that God’s silence is not his absence. They are a profound reminder of the faithfulness and character of God. If you have never studied the Psalms, I highly recommend you do. Not just cherry-picking verses but reading the fullness and richness of every Psalm from beginning to end. Let God renew your mind, speak into your life, and reveal his character through the cries of the Psalmist.
Romans 12:2, says, be transformed by the renewing of your mind. This verse reminds us of the power of God’s Word in creating life-long positive change. We all want change for the better, but it requires action on our part. And that action is disciplining ourselves to dwell on the Word of God. Sounds counterintuitive, doesn’t it? Dwelling in the Word and discipline. We want it to be easy. We want to feel like doing something before we actually do it. But sometimes we need the sheer act of will to do what we know is helpful and good and fruitful for us as followers of Jesus.
And that is spending time with God and his Word.
It’s really important that you and I have a rich and deep understanding of the gospel and a solid theological framework to even begin to make sense of some of the things that happen throughout the course of our lives. But too often we can settle for a Sunday faith and a sip of the gospel rather than an everyday faith that permeates every corner of our life. A faith deeply rooted in the living Word of God and empowered by the Holy Spirit.
Psalm 1:1-3 says, Blessed is the one… whose delight is in the law of the Lord, and who meditates on his law day and night. That person is like a tree planted by streams of water that yields fruit in its season and does not wither. That is one profound truth of immersing yourself in Scripture; it will keep you from withering.
So what does being in God’s Word have to do with waiting on God? Sometimes waiting on God can cause us to wither. We grow weary in the waiting. You may be hoping for a long-awaited answer to prayer for financial provision, a job promotion, or vindication from a wrong committed against you. Waiting for God to provide a spouse, for your marriage to be restored, or for emotional or physical healing. Waiting is hard. Whether we are waiting on something big that can be life-altering or waiting in line, on hold, or in traffic, none of us likes to wait. We get impatient. We want to burst out in anger, or we internalize the pain of the wait and find ways to cope and numb the discontentment. We don’t like the feeling of being out of control and we can forget that God is in control. We don’t like it when God’s plan and timeline does not measure up with ours.
More often than not, waiting does not bring out the best in us. It can induce impatience, frustration, doubt, and fear. When you find yourself stuck in between what your life is and what you want your life to be, you may ask, “What is the point of waiting?” It’s hard to imagine God will bring any good from it. Waiting tries our patience and shows us what our faith is made of.
How do we act or react when we don’t get what we want and when we want it? Will we still trust God and remain faithful?
Experiencing divine delays can produce something beautiful in us if we let waiting do its work—a deeper dependence on God, greater resilience, and growing contentment as you learn to be grounded in Jesus. Experiencing the fruit of waiting will require you to get honest with him and muster up trust in God.
Psalm 22:1-2 recounts King David’s pain of feeling like God has forgotten him as he cries out,
My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? Why are you so far from saving me, so far from my cries of anguish? My God, I cry out by day, but you do not answer, by night, but I find no rest.
What is something you are waiting for? How are you feeling in the waiting? What are you wishing God would do? What thoughts are you dwelling on and what is your view of God as you wait?
Just take some time to think about the answers and when you have a moment, write them out in your journal. Sometimes it’s good to get our thoughts and feelings out on paper. It’s a way to help us process and can even be a way to get perspective on our circumstances.
In Psalm 13:1-4 King David once again puts pen to paper and processes his complaint to God when he cries out,
How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and day after day have sorrow in my heart? How long will my enemy triumph over me?Look on me and answer, Lord my God. Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death, and my enemy will say, “I have overcome him,” and my foes will rejoice when I fall.
How long, O Lord? Can you relate? Here, David has enemies who are causing him distress. What we know about David’s story is that he encountered several times when his enemies actually wanted to take his life. Maybe you don’t have enemies like that but perhaps you are facing ridicule or wrong accusations at work, and it feels like someone is trying to sink your reputation. Rather than worrying or retaliating, David shows a better way. Cry out to the Lord and ask him for help in the midst of your hardship. Resist taking matters into your own hands and acting in haste with a harsh word. Trust that the Lord sees, walk in integrity, pray like crazy, and wait. The enemy wants to get you all worked up but remember God is working out all things for your good.
After David groans to God and presents his petition for the Lord’s intervention, he remembers who God is. In the middle of waiting for deliverance, David acknowledges God’s character and declares that he will praise him in the waiting when he says,
But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation. I will sing the Lord’s praise, for he has been good to me (Psalm 13:5-6).
David gives us another cue on what to do when we are waiting on God. Remember. When we are stuck in the midst of an unwanted period of waiting, we can tend to forget God’s faithfulness and trust in his steadfast love. We get amnesia and fail to remember the times the Lord has come through in the past.
An example of recalling God’s faithfulness is seen in the book of Joshua. After the people of Israel supernaturally crossed the Jordan River to enter the Promised Land, God commanded Joshua to “Choose twelve men, one from each tribe. Tell them, ‘Take twelve stones from the very place where the priests are standing in the middle of the Jordan. Carry them out and pile them up at the place where you will camp tonight’” (Joshua 4:2-3). These stones of remembrance were to serve as a permanent reminder and a memorial to future generations of the miraculous river crossing.
Joshua’s stones of remembrance are just one monument in a series of memorials the Israelites used to commemorate the mighty acts of God on behalf of his people. To everyone else, the stones were just a heap of rubble, but to the people of God, they were a constant reminder that Yahweh was a personal and powerful God, working wonders on behalf of his people.
As you look back on your life, how have you experienced God’s faithfulness? How has God shown up in past circumstances that were difficult? How did you experience God’s provision in periods of waiting? If you are having a hard time with these questions, ask the Holy Spirit to show you. “Holy Spirit, show me the ways you have provided in my difficult season.”
What do you need to remember in your current period of waiting?
What if we, as the Israelites did, set up our own stones of remembrance? What visual cues can you put in place to jog your memory of God’s goodness? Maybe it’s keeping a journal to look back and reflect on all the prayers that were answered and all the ways God showed his steadfast love for you.
We often wait until we get our desired outcome before we praise God. What if we worshiped him and expressed a heart of gratitude in the midst of the waiting? As a follower of Jesus, you are actually called to do just that, to worship God as you wait. And not based on the condition that he will come through the way we want but because God deserves our praise in all circumstances.
Which brings me to another thought. What if that thing you are waiting for never comes to fruition? Let’s be honest, that is a hard pill to swallow. What if a spouse does not come and you remain single? What if you aren’t able to bear your own children? What if the diagnosis doesn’t get better? What if God doesn’t provide the financial breakthrough or the future job you envisioned. What if….
Don’t let the impatience of waiting cause you to wander from God. All too often, I have seen people get fed up with their faith because they are tired of waiting for an answer to a prayer. Or at least the answer they wanted. That’s not faith. That is a relationship based on conditions. God never promised life would go according to your plan, but he does promise that he works all things according to his plan. And his plan is working for your good, even when it doesn’t feel like it.
That is genuine faith—believing God is good when life feels anything but. I know, easier said than done. Genuine faith does not demand that God bends to our desires. Genuine faith bows to the perfect will of God. It is easier to act on feelings, but your feelings, while valid, are not truth. What would it look like for you to align your actions with faith? Meaning, even if you don’t feel like it, even if you are restless, annoyed, or just plain mad at God, how can you act in a way that reflects faith in Jesus? “I feel like taking matters into my own hands but instead I will exert self-control, meditate on God’s goodness, be still, and wait.” Waiting is often uncomfortable but life’s waiting room, with a mind fixed on Jesus, shapes us in powerful ways if we let it. We may not have chosen our circumstances, but we can embrace them with a grateful heart because we know God is at work. When you do you will be changed, and your life, though still difficult at times, will be filled with greater hope, joy, and the power to endure life’s challenges.
We need to know what we believe about God and then act consistently with those beliefs when confronted with the wait. Ultimately, our waiting periods are opportunities to deepen our trust in God’s character. He is faithful, loving, and wise. Lamentations 3:22-23 reassures us, the steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.
Remember, God’s faithfulness is unwavering, even as we wait.
Are you in the bad habit of stopping on God’s green lights? I wonder, what keeps you from going? Are you fearful of the future and uncertain about the path? Fear is never from God; it is always from the enemy, and it reflects our lack of trust.
Maybe you’re stopping on the go light because you see yourself as inadequate for the job. You are inadequate in yourself but totally capable through Christ. The wonderful thing about our Lord is when he gives us a go light, he also supplies the motor and the fuel to drive the engine. But we have to put the gears in forward and say, “I’m ready, Lord; let’s go.”
Or maybe you’re in stop mode simply because you’re lazy. Remember the parable of the talents? When the servant with one talent didn’t do anything with his resource, the master reprimanded him strongly. “You wicked, lazy slave,” he said. Laziness is a very strong offense to God; to him it’s wicked, not just a bad habit or a little character fault.
Perhaps you’re stopping when you should be going because you don’t want to go in the direction God is guiding you. You had a different plan for your life, and you can’t imagine God’s plan is best for you. Oh my, do you realize how much you’re missing by refusing to go in God’s direction? He has good plans for you, plans to bless you and to prosper you.
For ten years I chose to go my own way and refused to let God guide my way. I just didn’t believe I could be happy doing it God’s way, and so I spent ten years in selfishness and a lot of misery. But once I said, “Lord, I will go on your green light, and allow you to guide me,” I discovered such fulfillment and excitement and contentment in his path.
Stop or go—where are you today? Remember both are in God’s will for our lives at different times. Sometimes he tells us to get going and move fast, and other times we hear his “Be still and know that I am God.” We are most fulfilled, most satisfied and most contented when we willingly obey God’s stop and go lights in our lives.
We know from Numbers 9 God used an ingenious stop and go light for his people when they were in the desert. He put a cloud over the tabernacle Tent, and when the cloud was covering the Tent, that was the red light. They stayed put. When the cloud lifted, that was the green light. They moved on.
God has stop and go lights for us, too. I want to talk about what happens when we stop on God’s green light. Think about what happens when we sit still at God’s green lights. We impede not only our own progress, but others as well. The Body of Christ is meant to work together, as the parts of our own body do. When one part of the body is supposed to be moving and it doesn’t, the rest of the body gets slowed down, doesn’t it?
Are you slowing down some progress today because you’re sitting still when God wants you to move? Are you letting others carry the load you should be carrying? Are you sitting on the sidelines instead of getting in the race and running? If so, you’re slowing others down. And you’re missing the blessing that comes in doing. Jesus told his disciples: Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them (John 13:17).
When we stop on God’s go light, we waste precious time. Time is a resource God has given to us for which we will give an account. Think about what you’ve done with your time in the last week, the last month, the last year. Would you like to stand before God now and give an account as to how you’ve used that irreplaceable resource called time?
It’s hard to guide a car that isn’t moving, but once you get it going, you can guide it easily. Are you asking God to give you guidance before you get in motion? God wants you to step out on faith and trust him to light your path as you go. But he’s not going to shine a light on your path until you start walking down it.
How do you know if God wants you to go or not? Ask trusted counselors; seek a verse of confirmation; pray about it much. And if the light is green, go. If God shuts the door, then you know it’s time to stop again, but as long as the light is green, trust God; get moving.
Have you ever been stuck at a red light, and you think it’ll never change? Sometimes it seems like God has us stuck at a red light and we’re never going to get anywhere, but there’s nothing we can do to make it turn green.
The waiting periods of our lives, however, are very important to our spiritual growth, for through them we learn to walk by faith and not by sight. When we can accept our waiting periods, even though we don’t understand what’s happening, and tell the Lord we choose to trust him anyway, we then transfer the responsibility for the situation over to God and the monkey is off our backs.
Don’t we frequently misunderstand God when he has us stopped at a red light? We may even doubt his love and care for us, for our minds tell us that if he really cared, he’d move on our behalf right now. But God is willing to have us misunderstand him in order to achieve his goal for us: teaching us to walk by faith and not by sight.
I recall a three-year delay God gave me, when I so wanted to leave a job I was in. From my vantage point, no good could be served by remaining in that job another day. It was so painful to make myself go to that office each morning. So, in my usual style, I got the resume updated, and started the job search. I had full confidence I could find something suitable quickly.
Days turned into weeks and months, and jobs that looked like a shoe-in fell through. I asked:
“Why did you let that job fall through? That would have gotten me out of this mess.” But finally, I gave him permission to keep me there as long as it served his purposes, though I couldn’t imagine what good purposes could possibly be served. That’s the place we must come to.
Had I left that job when I wanted to, I would have missed three years of personal development that have been essential to my walk with God and the ministry he has given me. The tough lessons I learned then molded my character significantly. And in addition, during those years I acquired business skills and experience that allowed me to be self-employed, and that turned out to be essential in beginning this ministry. God knew what he was doing.
If you’re in that predicament today, wondering why God hasn’t done anything yet, try to remember the day will come when you can look back and see how he was developing you in that time. Someday he’ll give you a green light to go.
I’m examining God’s stop and go lights. He gives us clear signals and when we miss them or disobey them, we find ourselves in trouble. As I mentioned earlier, I tend to think if I’m not going, I’m not doing the right thing. But often God gives me a stop light, and I need to learn stop lights are in God’s will for me, just like go lights are.
Do you remember Peter on the mount of transfiguration, when Elijah and Moses appeared with Jesus? The light dazzled them, and Peter didn’t know what to say, but he talked anyway, saying “This is terrific. We should be doing something—let’s build three shrines here to memorialize this occasion.” Peter had big plans and thought surely God and everyone else would be impressed. But the voice from heaven said, This is my Son, whom I love. Listen to him! (Mark 9:7).
Or, in other words, “Please be quiet, Peter; you don’t know what to say so why are you talking. This is not a time to build; it’s a time to listen.” Peter wanted to go; God said stop.
And then I think of Martha who told the Lord it was time for Mary to cook—to get in that kitchen and do something. But Jesus told Martha that Mary had chosen the better way, the way of listening and learning and spending time in his presence. That was hard for Martha to understand because she thought the person who was working the hardest was the one doing the right thing. Jesus taught her: Be still, Martha, and know that I am God.
Have you been going and going, trying to make things happen on your own, ignoring God’s stop signals? Waiting is hard, isn’t it? But all of us have to spend some time in God’s waiting room, learning to look up at his cloud and wait for his signal, learning to trust him.
Waiting is difficult for me because I don’t like the unknown, because I want everything in neat little rows, no problems left unsolved. Waiting is hard for me when I think I know the right solution and can see no benefit in waiting for it to happen. Waiting is hard for me because I tend to be a controlling person, and I want everything to be on schedule—my schedule, that is.
When I take a closer look, I have to conclude my problem is I don’t want to let go and trust God. I’m afraid to trust God. It is a false trust in myself.
If you tend to go on God’s stop lights, I want to encourage you to remember the waiting room is not wasted time; it is where you need to be sometimes while God is making your path straight.
All of us understand stop and go lights. We are controlled by them daily. Well, God has stop and go lights for us, and we need to recognize and obey them. I want to talk about what happens when we stop when God says go or go when God says stop.
In Numbers 9 we find the Israelites in the desert on their way to the Promised Land, and God had instructed them to build a tabernacle in the Tent of Testimony. This was a sacred place, which was covered with a cloud that looked like fire. Whenever the cloud lifted from above the Tent, the Israelites set out; whenever it settled over the Tent, the Israelites encamped. It was a stop and go cloud.
Sometimes they would stop only for a night’s rest and then continue; the cloud would lift the next morning. And sometimes it would stay for two days or a month—or a year! They never knew; they simply had to look for God’s sign, then obey. Also, I notice God did not give them explanations for the stop and go signs. All they knew was to stop or go.
Therefore, they had to trust God. If they had gone when God said stop, they would have been lost. If they had stopped when God said go, they would have missed out on important progress to the Promised Land.
Now, think, when you’re driving and you decide to go on a stop light, you may run into someone you need to avoid, causing all kinds of relationship problems. You affect your own progress, and that of others as well. Then you can easily get in trouble with the authorities. If a traffic officer sees you, you’re sure to get a ticket.
The same is true in our walk with God when we decide to go before he has given us the green light. We run into trouble of all kinds. If you’re an action-oriented person like I am, this is a lesson you have to learn and re-learn many times. If I’m not moving, then I feel like something must be wrong.
I tend to barrel ahead, looking at the goal line, running in my own strength many times, thinking I’m getting the job done for the Lord. Often, I can find myself going ahead without prayer or guidance. But I’m having to learn when I go on a stop signal, I get in the way of what God wants to do for me and through me. Going on a stop light causes lots of problems.
Well, today is not such a good day for Fran. In fact, she is at the point of tears as she comes back to her office from a business meeting with her most important client. Closing her door, she plops in her chair and brushes away a tear that tries to escape. “Why did he say that to me?” she says out loud to herself. “Why would he be so cruel to me? I worked so hard on that promotion, and he shot it down without even listening to my idea!”
“Feelings hurt today?” Jesus softly asks, though of course he has no need to ask since he knows everything.
Fran is again reminded of his abiding presence in her life. “Well, I don’t know if it’s my feelings that were hurt. . .” she stammers; “I think it was the crass insensitivity and unprofessionalism of Mr. Andrews. He was unnecessarily brutal.”
“Feelings are hurt, Fran,” Jesus states. “Might as well admit it; nothing to be ashamed of. Everyone gets their feelings hurt from time to time.”
“Well, yeah, I guess he hurt my feelings. I mean, I’ve worked so hard for that account and before this he liked everything I did,” Fran explains. “Now out of the blue he hits me with this response—so unfair, you know.”
“What exactly did he say?” Jesus asks.
“You were there, Lord,” Fran replies, with a bit of frustrated sarcasm.
Jesus laughs. “Yes, but it would be good for you to repeat what has upset you so much.”
Fran feels ashamed of her inappropriate reaction. “I’m sorry. Well, he said I had not researched this promotion adequately and he was not comfortable going with my idea until I did my homework.”
“And what was wrong with that comment?” Jesus asked.
“What was wrong? I had an entire report backing up my idea. I did my homework. I always do my homework. That’s what’s gotten me where I am; everybody knows Fran does the job right,” Fran responds.
“A bit defensive, are we?” Jesus quietly asks.
Fran doesn’t like where this conversation is heading, so she suddenly gets busy with her work. “Nobody understands me,” she mumbles to herself, all the time knowing it’s not true. She’s not yet ready to give up her pity party!
As she’s leaving the office that afternoon, her friend, Alice, pops in. “Hi, want to grab some pizza tonight with the kids?”
“Oh, Alice, I’m so glad you came by,” Fran lights up. “I was going to call you and see if you could come over tonight. I need to talk with you.”
“What about?” she asks.
“Oh, I had a rough meeting with Mr. Andrews. I need some advice,” she replies.
They make plans for Alice to get the pizza while she picks up her children. After a time with the kids, some homework assignments, and a Bible story, Fran gets Drew and Alice to bed. Then the two of them settle down for their long talk. “Okay, let me have it,” Alice says.
Tears start to come to her eyes again and Fran says, “Oh, it’s probably no big deal but Mr. Andrews really let me have it today in front of everybody. You know that big promotion I’ve been working on–well, he said I didn’t have sufficient research to proceed and to ‘take it back to the drawing boards,’ to use his words. He said there were too many unanswered questions.”
Fran pauses and looks at Alice, waiting for her response, still fighting to hold back her tears. Alice nods and says, “And. . .”
“And what?” Fran raises her voice. “Isn’t that enough?”
“Well, I mean, is that all he said?” Alice asks.
“Don’t you think that was very rude and unprofessional of him? I mean, in front of everybody. . .” Fran says in frustration.
“Who was there?” Alice asks.
“His assistant, Bernie, and Jim from the Art Department,” Fran says.
“Uh, huh,” Alice cautiously responds. “That’s not exactly ‘everybody’, Fran,” she says.
“Oh, you just don’t understand, Alice!” Fran is angry. “I guess you’re thinking it was just an overreaction.”
“Come on, Fran, give me a break,” Alice says.
“How about giving me a break and trying to be understanding?” she says.
“Okay, I want to be understanding, but I’m just not sure what Mr. Andrews said that upset you so much. Maybe you just had to be there or something.”
Tears start down Fran’s face. “Alice, don’t you understand. He said I didn’t do a thorough job and. . . and. . .”
“And you always do a thorough job,” Alice says quietly. “Yeah, I’m beginning to get it.” She quietly says, “Do you want me to pray about this with you?”
Fran knows prayer is long overdue, but on the other hand, she doesn’t want to give up her pity party! However, she hesitatingly says, “Yeah, please pray.”
As she listens to Alice’s prayer, Fran’s defenses start to break down. “Fran,” she hears the voice of Jesus, “truth sometimes hurts, but remember, truth sets you free.” Jesus has told her that before,
but once again she needs to be reminded that facing the truth, painful as it may be, is always the best way to go.
After Alice finishes, Fran prays, “Dear Jesus, I hate to admit it, but I’m wrong. I overreacted again–it’s one of my worst weaknesses and I don’t think I’ll ever get control of it. Please forgive me. Mr. Andrews had every right to say what he did, and I just blew it out of proportion.”
She finds it difficult to continue; Jesus whispers in her ear, “I understand; you don’t have to say any more.”
“Thank you for understanding me even when I don’t understand myself,” she says as she finishes her prayer.
Fran looks at Alice. “Do you think I’ll ever learn not to overreact?” she asks. “I mean, I seem to do it all the time. In retrospect I can see how silly it was of me to read so much into Mr. Andrew’s comments.”
“Well, I think you delight the Lord because you’re always honest and real with him, Fran, and you come around fast,” she says. “I’ve never known anyone as honest with herself as you are.”
“Really?” Fran is surprised. “Hmm. . . I never thought about it that way.”
“You’re such a good friend, Alice. I really appreciate your honesty with me and helping me see what I need to see about myself. You know, I was trying to tell my dad about it this afternoon on the phone, and he really didn’t get it. But I just attributed that to the difference in the way men and women handle things like this.”
“What do you mean?” Alice asks.
“Well,” Fran answers, “we women tend to be more subtle and careful about the words we choose because we know how easily our feelings can be hurt. I think men tend to simply state facts and let the chips fall where they may, so to speak. Therefore, what Mr. Andrews said about me not doing a complete job really hurt my feelings, but a man would see that as a simple directive—something to be expected. Don’t you think that’s true, Alice?”
Alice thinks about it a minute. “Well, it sure makes men sound terribly insensitive, which they can be sometimes, I’m sure. But it’s also part of our personality and how much we are personally affected. I have to admit, I couldn’t see why you were that upset over it. But there again, it wasn’t me there having to listen to what he said, so I could just be more objective at that moment.”
Fran starts to laugh. “Isn’t it crazy how differently we see things,” she comments. “His comment hurt my feelings so badly; I took it very personally, but you heard it as just a simple business decision. You’re right—when our toes are stepped on, it tends to feel much more personal!”
Well, some good lessons learned. Proverbs 16:20 tells us “Whoever gives heed to instruction prospers, and blessed is he who trusts in the Lord.”
If you think back over this episode, you can see why Fran overreacted to her client’s remarks. He challenged her in the one area where Fran felt she excelled—her attention to details and her competence at doing her job. You see, Fran has done very well in her company because of these good qualities, and subtly, without realizing it, she had started to take some pride in herself for her achievements.
Pride is such a deceitful snare. It sneaks up on you while you’re not looking. The very gifts God gives us can become points of pride in our lives, when we begin to think we’ve done something ourselves. And so, this somewhat painful meeting Fran had with her client punctured that pride and the poison came oozing out. But, as humbling as it was, it was a very good lesson because Fran was able to see it for herself and recognize her pride before it got too far out of hand.
Maybe you too need to learn to control your reactions. If you find yourself speaking hastily when you’re upset, getting your feelings hurt too easily, or exaggerating incidents to be much larger than they are, start praying that God will help you not to overreact. Frankly, I’ve been praying that for myself for years, and though I’m not there yet, I’ve made some progress in the right direction.
I wonder, do you have days when you feel like the score is: the world – 100; God – 0? Does it sometimes appear you’re on the losing team?
You go to a job where God is irrelevant to the people around you. Where his name is used only in profanity, and they seemingly give no thought to God as creator, ruler, or sovereign. You’re in a daily environment where a commitment to Jesus Christ is looked upon as foolish, naive, laughable. When you apply biblical principles in your everyday world, people take advantage of you, ignore you, or discount your ideas altogether.
Let’s face it, that’s the way it seems at times. You’re walking the straight and narrow, but what for? Where does it get you? The other team does what they please and get ahead for it. Do you sometimes feel like joining the other team? Are you tired of being in the minority all the time—seemingly losing all these skirmishes you face every day?
I want to encourage you today to remember one thing: The final chapter has been written, and we know what the end will be. I think of the young boy who was reading a thrilling mystery book when his mom insisted he put the book down and do his chores. “But, mom, I’m in the fourth chapter and the villain has the hero in his clutches. Looks like he’s going to die! I can’t quit now.” But mom insisted so hurriedly he flips to the last chapter and reads the final page. He then bounds into the kitchen where his mother is waiting and says, “Wow, that old villain is doing real good in Chapter 4, but just wait till he gets to the end of the book. Is he in for a surprise.” It looked like disaster in Chapter 4, but when you know the end, then Chapter 4 takes on a whole new perspective.
Maybe you’re in Chapter 4 today, and you need to flip to the end and read the last page. It’s already been written, and I can tell you the outcome: Jesus wins and those of us who are his followers will win and reign with him. Read Revelations 20, 21, and 22 today.
Remember, God has not lost control of this world. He is bringing it to its end in his time and for his purposes. He is sovereign, and he still reigns in heaven.
So, as you head into that world where it may appear the score is unevenly in favor of the world’s crowd, remember the last chapter, and don’t let Chapter 4 get you down. If you know Christ as your savior, you’re on the winning team!
Would you love to catch the next flight to some forgotten island and leave no forwarding address? Running away sure looks appealing sometimes, doesn’t it? I sure have those feelings of wanting to run away from everything occasionally.
King David felt that way, too. He wrote, Oh, that I had the wings of a dove! I would fly away and be at rest (Psalm 55:6).
Maybe your job is just driving you crazy. Could be a difficult boss or a boring job; could be the people you work with or too much work. Or perhaps you’re having troubles with relationships; they can make you want to fly away. Maybe it’s your spouse, or your child, or some other family member. Could be a close friend, a romantic relationship. Undoubtedly for many people it’s financial worries that make them want to run away.
Whatever it is that’s giving you the run-away blues, I want you to know you’re not alone. I remember when I begged God to let me out of a job I was in. I wanted out so badly, I thought I couldn’t take another day. But God made it clear to me he had a purpose in keeping me there for a while longer. And finally, I agreed to submit and stay there until his time was up.
I look back and see why: I needed to learn many spiritual lessons in that spot, and now I wouldn’t take anything for those lessons. There were people with whom I formed friendships and shared the meaning of the Lordship of Jesus Christ. I wouldn’t have missed that opportunity for anything. And, like icing on the cake, the business knowledge I gained by hanging in another couple of years gave me the resource and experience I needed to start my own consulting company.
It’s easy to see that now, but at the time all I could do was simply agree with God to persevere.
Watch out that you do not lose what we have worked for, but that you may be rewarded fully (2 John 8).
Most of us give up just before the victory! And when we do, we waste all the hard work and effort that’s been poured into our lives.
I want to encourage you today to persevere. Say with King David instead of running away you will cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken (Psalm 55:22).
Sometimes I feel like I take three spiritual steps forward and five backward. Do you get that same feeling? Sometimes it just looks like I'll never make real progress, and I'm frequently so very disappointed in myself.It's bad enough other people let us down all the time, but it's really difficult when we disappoint ourselves. Just recently I lost my patience with someone and raised my voice in anger. And a few minutes later as I calmed down and realized what I'd done, I just couldn't believe I had allowed that to happen. I was so disappointed in myself. With all I know and all I teach to others, how could I fail so miserably?I think it's healthy for us to realize not only will others disappoint us, we'll disappoint ourselves. We can't even trust ourselves. And from this, we can learn to trust God even more. An ancient saint of God, Fenelon, wrote the following: "Do not be surprised at again finding yourself becoming sensitive, impatient, haughty and self-willed. You must be made to understand that this is your natural disposition, and without God's grace, you will never be anything different."This is what we need to learn—that never will we be able to please God or ourselves on our own. C. S. Lewis wrote in Mere Christianity: "Very often what God first helps us towards is not the virtue itself but just the power of always trying again. It cures our illusions about ourselves and teaches us to depend on God. We learn, on the one hand, that we cannot trust ourselves even in our best moments, and on the other, that we need not despair even in our worst, for our failures are forgiven."[1]If you've been disappointed in yourself lately, use it as a time to cure your illusions about yourself, and remember even at your best, you have nothing to offer God except your heart and your will, and at your weakest and your worst, he can transform you into a vessel for his glory.[1] Lewis, C. S. (1952). Mere Christianity. Harpercollins Publishers. (Original work published 1952)
Are you feeling anxious about something today? Are you very disturbed over a situation in your life? Does it seem impossible to find any rest and peace right now? Recently a passage in Isaiah 48 gave me some insight into the reasons behind the anxiety and unrest I was experiencing.This is what the Lord says—your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: I am the Lord your God who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go. If only you had paid attention to my commands, your peace would have been like a river, your well-being like the waves of the sea (Isaiah 48:17-18).How incisively the Word of God cuts through and exposes the real issues. I was reminded anxiety and unrest are often a result of my failure to pay attention to what I know about God. Rarely do I need some new truth or principle to help me out; I just need to practice what I know already.I find I rarely make a deliberate decision to wander from God's principles. It's simply a failure to pay attention to what I know already. My focus becomes fractured. I move slightly off-center, simply because I haven't paid attention like I should.And when that happens, the results are loss of peace, loss of rest, anxiety, frustration. When you start to dig underneath those outward effects, you often discover the cause is failure to pay attention to God's commands. It may be something that seems very small, but if we walk away from doing it God's way, we can expect to lose the peace and rest we so need.The Lord told his people, if only you had paid attention to my commands, your peace would have been like a river (Isaiah 48:18).If you're missing peace in your life today, check out the obedience department and see if there's some area where you're not paying attention to God. Once you get that straightened out, that wonderful, marvelous, indescribable peace will return, like a river, flooding your heart and calming your nerves.
Have you ever said: "Lord, it's enough! When are you going to do something about this? Why are you waiting so long?" Well, I don't know anyone who hasn't asked those questions of God at some time or another in their Christian walk. I certainly have.When it looks as though God has waited too long to answer your prayers, you need to stop and realize his purposes may be quite different from yours. Frequently before he responds to your need, he is adjusting you to the trouble and helping you learn a much-needed lesson. Maybe he wants to teach you that you can face and endure trouble as long as he is with you in the trouble. Then he will take you out of it. But it will not happen until you have stopped being restless and fretful about it. He may be waiting for you to be calm and quiet. Then he can say, "It is enough."Paul Billheimer wrote in Adventures in Adversity: "There can be no testing of character without delays...By this means, during delay, God is testing and developing character. It is easy to be impatient with God when we fail to understand the purpose of his delay. However, God is willing to be misunderstood in the universe he has made, in order to achieve his purpose of character development."[1]I recall a three-year delay God gave me, when I so wanted to leave a job I was in. And if I had left when I wanted to, I would have missed three years of personal development that have been essential to my walk with God and the ministry he has given me. The tough lessons I learned then molded my character and prepared me for what was ahead.When it was finally over, I wrote in my journal: "I praise you it is now enough. My time in this job is over, but I praise you did not end it until you had completed your work in me." It's easy to say that at the end, but difficult to say it in the middle, isn't it?If you're in that predicament today, wondering why God hasn't done anything yet, try to remember the day will come when you can look back and see how he was developing you in that time. Someday he'll say to you, "It is enough now." Until then, keep trusting and believing he waits so he can be gracious unto you.[1] Billheimer, P. (1984). Adventure in Adversity. Tyndale House Publishers.
Presented by Lauren StibgenHoly Spirit power! How do you know if you have it? I must admit, thinking about Holy Spirit power had me deep into God’s Word, seeking to understand if I was experiencing this power in my own life!Looking into God’s Word, we see the Holy Spirit present in Scripture starting in Genesis 1, throughout the Old Testament and especially in the New Testament. In fact, in Romans 8:11 we are told that the same power that raised Jesus from the grave is alive in us today! Wow!All of this had me thinking—how could I see this power? What I found was the disciples in the early church, and especially Paul, left behind many practical ways for us to evaluate our Holy Spirit power and to flex what I am calling our Holy Spirit power muscles!You see, just as the muscles in our body become more responsive to exercise, Holy Spirit power also becomes more responsive to how much we “exercise” or pay attention to how we display this power in our lives. I would like us to look at verses we have likely read before, but I am hoping that we look at them differently in light of Holy Spirit power.How do you know you have Holy Spirit power? First the indwelling of the Holy Spirit is reserved for those who place their faith in Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior. In Acts 2:38, Peter states, Repent and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins, and you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. Once you receive this gift, how do you know its power in your life? Well, we are told in Galatians 5:22 that the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, and self-control.I love the word fruit. Think about how fruit grows. It takes different forms of power to create fruit. Fertile soil, rain, sunshine, warmth. Just like we nurture our bodies in exercise to build muscles, plants must be nurtured to produce fruit! What kind of nurturing are you giving the fruit of the Spirit?You have likely read Galatians 5:22 many times and even heard a sermon or two about it, but have you used it to see how the power of the Holy Spirit is moving in your life? I started to think about each one of the fruits and how much or how little it was showing up in my life. To be even more specific, how was it showing up in my work?Love. You may be thinking love and work don’t mesh, but if you have Holy Spirit power working in your life, love is foundational to your work. And yes, this applies if you work in a secular workplace. The greatest commandment in the Bible is to love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, and soul and to love your neighbor as yourself (Luke 10:27). As we dig deeper into Scripture, we see that a neighbor is anyone in our path who may be in need. The best example of love in the Bible is Jesus. How did Jesus love others? How does God love us? Unconditionally—as we are. How are you loving people at work? Even those who are different from you?Joy. Maybe you don’t like your job. In fact, you dread waking up to go every day. Or maybe you love your job! Often, we see the words joy and happiness used as synonyms but, what about biblical joy. I really liked this definition by John Piper:Christian joy is a good feeling in the soul, produced by the Holy Spirit, as he causes us to see the beauty of Christ in the word and in the world.[1]Why do I like this? First, because clearly, joy is a product of Holy Spirit power and second it tells us to see the beauty of Christ in the Word and in the world! Like me, your world includes work. Seeing the beauty of Christ could mean something as small as giving thanks for the job you have that brings financial provision, or maybe you have great relationships with the people you work with. Have you learned a new skill at work? All these seemingly mundane, worldly things can bring you joy if you see them through the lens of Christ. And when you are struggling,
Presented by Lauren Stibgen
Have you ever felt drawn to talk with someone, and you didn’t know why? We will see how Holy Spirit power can often prompt us to talk with someone about a specific issue or situation.
In the book of Acts, Holy Spirit power was very present in the early church. In Acts 8 we see Philip told by the Holy Spirit to go to that chariot and stay near to it. You may know this story. The Ethiopian enuch is in the chariot reading from the book of Isaiah. Philip tells this man about Jesus. From this encounter we see one of the first gentile conversions in the early church.
Are you too busy to hear how Holy Spirit power may be leading you to approach someone in conversation? Our days are busy! But they shouldn’t be too busy to the point we ignore that feeling that we should approach someone to ask how their day is going! Holy Spirit power leading you into a conversation doesn’t always mean you are being asked to share the gospel, but it could be a step God is asking you to take that will display your faith at work through kindness.
Is there a conversation you have been meaning to have but time has not allowed it? Sometimes at work it is easy to overlook the good that is going on around you—especially if other things are not going well or your schedule is just overloaded. One of the ways I seek Holy Spirit power is in the way I need to compliment and thank people for the work they do—especially if it helps me or the organization.
Waiting for a formal opportunity or a performance review may be the norm in your organization, but I find small conversations, even in passing, that recognize a team member or colleagues’ work, can go a long way. Maybe you are like me and spend time in the morning in God’s word or in prayer. It is during this time I jot down 1-2 names and pray for an opportunity to tell them how much I appreciate them.
Perhaps it is more complex. Is there a conversation you have been avoiding? You know, the one that has a knot in your stomach? Seeking Holy Spirit power in guiding your words can give you the confidence to move ahead and have the conversation. Again, spending time in prayer can bring you closer to helping seek the words and leading to this conversation.
And, maybe Holy Spirit power is moving to tell you to share the gospel at work or invite someone to church. For some of you, this may feel like a risk at work, but taking a page from the early church in the book of Acts, we can look for ways the Holy Spirit may be moving in a conversation that allows us to have that next conversation. Perhaps it is as simple as offering to pray for a colleague in a time of need.
Today, don’t ignore the Holy Spirit power urging you on to have a conversation!
Presented by Lauren Stibgen
Did you know even if you don’t hold a formal leadership position, you are called and qualified as a leader for Jesus? If you have faith in Jesus, you are his ambassador for the gospel. Did you know even Jesus sought the Holy Spirit as he selected his disciples? Just as Jesus sought this wisdom in qualifying you, Holy Spirit power can also move in both your qualification and how you seek to select others to be part of your team.
First, consider that being known to be full of the Spirit and wisdom was a qualification of those who were selected to serve in the early church. If you are truly working as a disciple of Jesus, the presence of Holy Spirit power in your life is a requirement! Not only was considering your qualification prayed over, but God is very specific in his assignments! In Acts 16 we see God set apart Barnabas and Saul to proclaim his word in Salamis. If you are working in a secular workspace, like many of us do, consider your qualification and assignment to reflect Jesus to others at work.
We are also called and qualified to keep watch over ourselves and all of the flock of which the Holy Spirit has made us overseers (Acts 20:28).
While the reference in this Scripture is to those in the early church, we know those that are on our teams have been entrusted to us—not only by the company we work for, but they are entrusted in our care by God. If we consider the power of the Holy Spirit in our watch over our flock, how would this change how we see the people on our team? Let Holy Spirit power move in you to show them care like a shepherd or overseer. But not only are we called to watch over those entrusted to us, but this passage also calls us to keep watch over ourselves. Staying mindful of how we show up as a leader and overseer is important both in being a leader at work and as an ambassador for Jesus!
Maybe you are adding to your team. How can Holy Spirit power help you in selecting team members? Every hire is important. Consider how praying for the right candidate, the right interview questions and even timing on the decision may impact the outcome. Even the practice of pausing to pray for these things can bring things to light maybe you haven’t considered before. Statistically, turnover can cost an organization up to 1.5 times the individual’s salary if the hire doesn’t work out. Not only will seeking Holy Spirit power bring you the right candidate, it may also save your organization money.
Wow! Holy Spirit power qualifies us, assigns us, and also helps us to qualify and assign others! Make sure you are seeking the Spirit in prayer regularly.
Presented by Lauren Stibgen
Who do you turn to when conflict arises at work? At one time or another, we will all face conflict at work. How we respond to that conflict can have many implications—especially if the conflict is with a boss or even a close colleague. How can Holy Spirit power guide you during conflict?
Turning back to the book of Acts, we know the disciples often faced conflict with other religious leaders and local gentiles who believed in other gods. In fact, Paul’s proclamation of this gospel directly impacted the work of many craftsmen who made carved images of the local gods. Many of the conflicts; however, would occur in the church between Jews who wanted to keep customs such as circumcision and their belief that Gentile believers should hold to the same traditions as the Jews. After much debate, a letter was sent.
It seemed good to the Holy Spirit and to us not to burden you with anything beyond the following requirements (Acts 15:28).
To read more about how they came to write this letter, turn to Acts 15. But, for now, at a high level, here are some of the steps the disciples took—clearly seeking the Holy Spirit to guide them through the conflict.
First, they listened to both sides of the conflict. We know the Gentiles were converted and the Jews wanted them to obey the law. Second, they discussed their differences. Next, they remained rooted in facts—not feelings. They provided supporting evidence and based on this, came to a solution that was acceptable to both sides. Finally, they communicated the outcome.
While I am sure the Jews still would have liked for the Gentiles to follow the law, they were compelled by the facts and evidence that God was moving in the Gentiles.
We know by our Scripture above that it was the Holy Spirit power compelling this resolution.
How can you follow this pattern in your own conflict? Listen, discuss, present facts, provide evidence and deliver clear communication about the decision.
Seek the Holy Spirit in prayer as you move through this conversation and see how Holy Spirit power moves! Another observation from this conflict is it wasn’t just a one-on-one dialogue. I have often found when conflicts arise at work, it is almost always most helpful to have a neutral third party come alongside both parties to ensure the discussion stays on track.
Presented by Lauren Stibgen
Have you ever felt like you needed to be bolder or have more courage at work? The Holy Spirit can help!
Every year I pray over a word of focus for the year. In 2022, as our world was moving back into its normal busyness after the pandemic, I was thinking a lot about lost souls. How many people suffered and passed away never having heard about Jesus? My word for that year was bold. I wanted to learn more about how to share the gospel in the places I was the most—at work, socially, and with people close to me.
Throughout the books of Acts, we see the many trials the disciples faced as they proclaimed the gospel. Early in the book of Acts, Peter and John healed a lame man and drew a lot of attention. People asked how this could have happened! In Acts 4:8 we see these words, then Peter, filled with the Holy Spirit…
Filled with the Holy Spirit he proclaimed the healing he had done was in Jesus’ name! Of course, this caused even more of an uproar with the religious leaders of the time. The religious leaders asked them to no longer preach in Jesus’ name. Threats of imprisonment loomed, but Peter and John didn’t pray for protection. They prayed for boldness!
Now, Lord, consider their threats and enable your servants to speak your word with great boldness (Acts 4:29).
We see the answer to their prayer,
After they prayed, the place where they were meeting was shaken. And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and spoke the word of God boldly (Acts 4:31).
Like Peter and John, I prayed to be bold! The Holy Spirit has increased a spirit of power in me to share the gospel in many ways since January of 2022. Whether it is gathering with other women at work to pray, quote Scripture, send encouragement to non-believers, or invite people to church, I pray daily for God to use me for his glory.
My Holy Spirit power application for being bold is in sharing the gospel, but where else do you need to be bold at work? Maybe you need to take steps to look for a new job. Have you been afraid to ask for a raise or promotion? Do you need to speak up against something happening at work to you or a colleague?
Being bold takes more than just courage, it takes Holy Spirit power!
Presented by Lauren Stibgen
I want to challenge your thinking. Whether you have the title or not, you are a leader. If you have found salvation in Jesus Christ, your biblical identity bestows you with some big titles! We could spend a lot of time talking about identity, but let’s focus on ambassador.
We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us (2 Corinthians 5:20).
With such a title, ambassador, how do we lead for Christ? You are a leader; God is making an appeal through you!
Even with years of leadership under my belt and a more formal title along with it, there are times when I still find myself questioning my capabilities as a leader. If I think back to my career before I knew Jesus as my Savior and Lord, there were so many fears and failures, and I really didn’t have any place to take them. That has changed tremendously over the years, but recently even my own thinking was challenged to think about how Holy Spirit power can impact my leadership.
We can sometimes miss the way the Holy Spirit is called out in Scripture and the truly remarkable ways the Spirit of the Lord has such a profound role in the lives of those who lead. The Holy Spirit is often referenced as the Spirit, the Spirit of God, and the Spirit of the Lord.
In Genesis 1:2 we get our first description of the Spirit. …and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters. We don’t often think of the presence of the Holy Spirit. In this verse we see the word hovering and the where—over the face of the waters. Imagine with me the expanse and spread of the Spirit over all the face of the waters of the world!
Acts 2:3 describes tongues of fire resting on each of the disciples. The visual of fire is used many times to describe the Spirit in Scripture.
Often, we hear of the filling of the Holy Spirit or of the Holy Spirit who comes upon us. One thing is clear, the Holy Spirit brings power—the mighty power of God for those who are in Christ Jesus.
My favorite verse about the Holy Spirit is Romans 8:11.
And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies because of his Spirit who lives in you (Romans 8:11).
Wow, that is power. I think we often forget. You and I, we have a power within us that is strong enough to overcome death!
Now that you have a picture of this power consider how your leadership can be transformed.
I love to read old books, and I’ve been reading a collection of readings from some time-tested authors. One particular article recently caught my attention. You would have thought it was written yesterday, for it speaks so clearly to us today.
It is entitled “How to Change One’s Habits,” and the sentence which jumped off the page to me was: “Could the young but realize how soon they will become mere walking bundles of habits, they would give more heed to their conduct while in the plastic state.” Walking bundles of habits—what a clear picture that gives us of ourselves, does it not? Obviously, those can be good habits or bad habits, or some mixture of both, but I acknowledge that I am to a large degree a collection of the habits I’ve established in my life.
I want to talk about our “bundle of habits” and how we can add good ones and get rid of harmful ones.
You know, when you first start a habit that is harmful, you don’t intend for it to become a habit. Lately we see how so many have become addicted to pornography, especially on the internet. This is a devastatingly bad and evil habit, but my guess is that the person who first goes to one of those pornographic internet sites tells himself or herself they are doing it simply out of curiosity—just want to see what it’s like. And then one time leads to another and another and before they know it, they’re hooked.
I have heard it said, “Chains of habit are too light to be felt until they are too heavy to be broken.” If we dealt with our harmful habits in the beginning stages, we could pretty easily break them. This author calls it the “plastic state”—that period of time when breaking a habit wouldn’t be too hard to do. But the longer you allow it to continue, the more likely it will become part of your bundle of habits and then it’s very difficult to overcome.
Speaking of ancient authors, the Apostle Paul addressed this issue in his letter to the Romans. He said, Don’t you know that when you offer yourselves to someone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one you obey—whether you are slaves to sin, which leads to death, or to obedience, which leads to righteousness?. . . Just as you used to offer yourselves as slaves to impurity and to ever-increasing wickedness, so now offer yourselves as slaves to righteousness leading to holiness (Romans 6:16, 19).
In other words, since we are all walking bundles of habit, we need to make certain that those habits lead to holiness and righteousness. Unfortunately, many times we’re controlled by bad habits. If you truly want to break a bad habit—and you have to really want to do it—begin by specifically praying about that habit.
Whether it’s what we may classify as an innocent bad habit or one that is recognized as harmful, if you are addicted to it and it’s not good for you, ask God to give you strength to overcome it. Then in order to break that habit, you need to replace it with a good habit. Habit is overcome by habit. As Paul wrote to the Romans, you and I choose whether we will be a slave to sin or a slave to righteousness—whether we will incorporate habits that are wrong or replace them with good habits.
The first part is the hardest part—getting started. You have to stop talking about it and start doing it. As Jesus said, Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them (John 13:17). The blessing is in the doing. So, how do you get started when you want to break a bad habit? After praying about it, you need to determine what new habit you will use to overcome the bad habit. Remember, habit is overcome by habit.
For example, if you watch too much television or see too many movies that are not good for you, what new thing will you do to replace the time you used to spend watching the wrong things? You could get some Christian movies to replace them; you could find a good book to read instead of watching the television. It will be most helpful if you determine in advance what new good habit you will put in place of the old harmful one. Instead of eating chocolates, you eat carrot sticks—whatever.
Do everything you can to launch your new habit in a strong and intentional way. Get rid of anything that will tempt you; accumulate anything that will reinforce your decision. If you’re trying to change bad eating habits, don’t stock your refrigerator with all the bad stuff. Stay away from people or circumstances that encourage the old habit and surround yourself with people and conditions that will encourage your new habit. Don’t make it easy for the enemy to tempt you. Then, just be tough on yourself, especially at first, until the new habit is securely rooted in your life.
If lack of discipline is one of your bad habits, it will keep you in bondage to your bad habits. But start working on them one at a time, and as you are successful in breaking one bad habit, it gives you encouragement to work on others.
Zig Ziglar once said, “When you choose a habit, you also choose the end of that habit.” We are all walking bundles of habits, and our challenge is to make sure we are walking bundles of good habits.
It’s true that habits have consequences, so when you allow a habit to become engrained in your life, that habit will produce consequences, either good or bad. I’ve often said you can choose your sin, but you can’t choose its consequences. And that’s true of habits. However, if they’re good habits, then the consequences are wonderful.
For example, if you are very disciplined about spending quality time with God on a daily basis and you are studying God’s Word and praying and learning how to be a better follower of Jesus Christ, that habit will produce wonderful fruit in your life. You will be like a tree with deep roots, and you’ll be strong in good times and in bad times because of that good habit of daily time with God.
Now, that habit takes discipline. If you are depending on your feelings to get you going, you’re going to find that those feelings are very undependable. This good habit begins by setting your alarm clock earlier and getting up when it goes off, so you have that quiet time alone with God.
Establishing this good habit in your life means you have a plan and a structure to help you read and study God’s Word, and you are truly learning how to pray more effectively. I can promise you there will be few days when you will wake up with a burning desire to get up and get into the Word. You will do that mostly through sheer discipline—strengthened by your dependence on God to help you.
But I can wholeheartedly tell you that once you begin through discipline to establish this very good habit in your life—the most important habit for a Christian—you will become addicted to the new habit. You will see that God is changing you, you are coping with life so much better, the joy of the Lord is truly giving you strength, and pretty soon you just know you can’t make it very well without regular, planned time with God. That good habit will do more good than any other habit at getting rid of bad habits in your life. As I said, habit is overcome by habit.
I don’t think I’ve ever quoted Aristotle before, but here’s something he said which is very true: “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then, is not an act, but a habit.” Since the beginning of time, it has been true that we are creatures of habit—or as I’ve said, walking bundles of habit. And it is also very true that the longer a habit is engrained in your life, the more difficult it is to break.
That applies to good habits as well as harmful ones. So, the smart thing to do is to make sure you eliminate the harmful habits in your life and replace them with good habits—things that will make you more effective for Jesus and his Kingdom. And, of course, that takes discipline and commitment.
Let me ask you: What are you repeatedly doing that is building excellence in your life? Zig Ziglar says, “We build our character from the bricks of habit we pile up day by day.” So, what you repeatedly do every day determines your character. Are you building good character in your life through repeatedly doing what you know you should do?
We must teach our bodies that they cannot just do anything they want to do or have everything they want. The Apostle Paul wrote: Therefore I do not run like someone running aimlessly; I do not fight like a boxer beating the air. No, I strike a blow to my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize (1 Corinthians 9:26-27).
No doubt Paul was exaggerating when he said, “I beat my body”, but he wanted to make the point that without discipline over his body’s demands, he would never be able to do what God had planned for him to do. It’s very easy to become slaves to our own bodies, and those bad habits can ruin us—physically, mentally and spiritually ruin us.
Here’s a good suggestion: Teach your body that it must come under God’s control by regularly doing something—every day or two—that you would rather not do. For example, you don’t eat sweets for a day, even though you want them, but you tell your body, “Nope, you don’t get what you want today.”
You know, when you give an account to Jesus for how you’ve lived your life and used your resources, it would be so sad if you’ve wasted time by simply not getting rid of bad habits. If you’re born from above, you have the Holy Spirit to empower you to get rid of bad habits; you have no excuse.
Would you like to change a bad habit? I have some final suggestions that may be helpful. Take it one step at a time. You can’t change everything at once, so choose a small goal and stick to it for at least 30 days until it becomes engrained.
For example, if you have trouble getting up on time or getting up early enough to have time with God each day, determine by God’s grace to overcome it. Put an alarm clock or your smart phone on the other side of the room so you have to get up to turn it off—or whatever you have to do to force yourself to put those feet on the floor as soon as the alarm goes off. And determine that come what may, you will stick with it for 30 days.
Give a friend or mate or relative some money—like maybe $50—and tell them to hold it for you and only return it to you if you’ve kept your 30-day commitment to get up on time each morning. That should help to motivate you. Accountability is a key factor in putting change into our lives.
Then, once you’ve had some success even in a small way, it will encourage you to know that God will give you the victory over other bad habits. You will build one good habit on another, and you’ll replace bad habits with good ones. I promise you; it really works.
For some people discipline comes easier than others, but whether or not it’s easy for you, if you’re a child of God through faith in Jesus Christ, you have what it takes to be victorious over bad habits, because you have the Holy Spirit residing within you to empower you. Now, what you have to do is claim the victory that is yours through Jesus and put the discipline in place.
First John 5:4: says: …for everyone born of God overcomes the world. This is the victory that has overcome the world, even our faith.
You have great blessings in store as you overcome your bad habits and become a walking bundle of good habits, bringing honor and glory to Jesus.
Proverbs 18:17 says, in a lawsuit the first to speak seems right, until someone comes forward and cross-examines. This proverb is very good advice for us.
What it teaches us is to withhold judgment and opinions until we’ve heard both sides to any story. We shouldn’t be gullible, and we shouldn’t jump to conclusions.
This is a particularly difficult area for me, for I am very impulsive and very much an overreactor. And every time I do that, I regret it. I am by God’s grace focusing prayer and attention in my life on learning to wait until I hear both sides of any story, to make sure I’ve got my facts straight, to remember there may be something here I just don’t know yet.
I remember coming into the office on a very busy day, to find a message that irritated me at once. With only partial information, I thought this other person was doing something way out of line, and I overreacted. I went to the phone and started calling her, to get things straightened out. Thankfully, she was not in, and I didn’t get to speak with her at that time.
When she did return my call and explained the situation, I realized the message had not been complete, and if I had talked with her earlier, I would have overreacted and probably hurt her feelings. God protected me that time and reminded me how much I need to learn not to overreact.
Wise Solomon warned us the first person to present their case can sound very convincing, because we haven’t heard the other side of the story. We need to listen to people, but not be too quick to agree or disagree with them until we’ve sorted out the facts and know what we’re dealing with. This is good advice for managers and employees alike.
I want to encourage you to go to the Proverbs daily for guidance. There are 31 chapters, so you can read the one that corresponds to the day of the month. I’ve been doing that for several years, and many times God has used the Proverbs to give me clear guidance, especially on job-related issues.
I’m examining a Proverb a day to show us the way, because the book of Proverbs is wonderfully applicable to the situations we face in our everyday lives.
Proverbs 6:2-5 gives us some very practical advice.
You have been trapped by what you said, ensnared by the words of your mouth. So do this, my son, to free yourself, since you have fallen into your neighbor’s hands: Go—to the point of exhaustion—and give your neighbor no rest! Allow no sleep to your eyes, no slumber to your eyelids. Free yourself, like a gazelle from the hand of the hunter, like a bird from the snare of the fowler (Proverbs 6:2-5).
How many times have you wanted to crawl under a table because you said something you wished you hadn’t? Perhaps they were words spoken in anger or haste, or words of gossip, or judgmental words. Unkind, untruthful, harsh, unnecessary words that inflicted harm of some kind.
What do you do? You can’t unsay them; you can’t delete them; you can’t erase them. Those words hang there in your memory and the memory of others. What can you do?
Solomon says to go and humble yourself to the person your words harmed; go, confess to them, and do it immediately. Apologize and do all you can to free yourself from the damage of those words.
Now, I know that’s not easy to do. But it’s a lot easier than not doing it! Once in a hotel on a business trip, I accused a hotel employee of neglecting to follow my instructions. I was certain I had given those instructions. So, nicely, but directly, I said, “I’m sure it’s your fault; please correct it.”
Well, a few minutes later I came to realize I was the one who was wrong, not him. It was embarrassing; I wanted to run away. But I forced myself to go to the phone, call the young man and apologize to him. Even a simple apology like that wasn’t easy, but once I did it, I felt so free. And I could tell it made a big difference to him. He kept saying, “That’s so nice of you to call. Thank you.” Well, it wasn’t nice of me; it was the right thing to do.
If you’ve offended someone with words, don’t procrastinate. Go right now, today and apologize. That’s good advice from Proverbs.
Proverbs is a very practical book, one which we can easily apply to our everyday lives in the working world. I’m examining a Proverb a day, which will show you the way!
Instruct the wise and they will be wiser still; teach the righteous and they will add to their learning (Proverbs 9:9).
One of the most important characteristics every Christian should have, in my opinion, is teachableness. A person who is teachable is a very wise person, and a truly humble person, who recognizes they don’t know it all and there’s always something new to learn.
As a manager, I can tell you it is a joy to have an employee who has a teachable spirit, who is willing to learn and looking for ways to improve. A manager will endure mistakes and learning cycles and will hang in there with you much longer if he or she sees an attitude of teachableness—wanting to learn. Nothing is more frustrating than trying to work with a person who knows it all and has no desire to learn anything new.
How about you? Are you teachable? How do you respond when you’re given helpful hints or suggestions? Do you resent it? Sometimes we can learn from younger people, people in business shorter times than us, people below us in rank. But if you’ve got your back up or you feel threatened when someone tries to teach you something, you’re likely to stagnate right where you are.
It is very smart and very mature to accept teaching, to listen to new ideas and suggestions. Managers need this quality as much—perhaps more—than anyone else. Many times, we managers fail to listen to our employees, who have very good ideas that could help us if we were more teachable.
The day you get beyond being teachable, you’re in trouble, because that’s the day you’ll stop growing. And you don’t just stand still; you go backwards.
I’m sharing a Proverb a Day, which will show you the way. Listen to this passage from Proverbs 6:
Go to the ant, you sluggard: consider its ways and be wise! It has no commander, no overseer or ruler, yet it stores its provision in summer and gathers its food at harvest (Proverbs 6:6-8).
In the margin of my Bible by this verse I have written “self-motivated.” The ant is a self-motivated creature. Without anyone standing over all those ants and telling them what to do, they perform their jobs diligently and are prepared for what lies ahead.
Self-motivation is a key factor in our business world today. Very few people have it. Too many people are just trying to get by with as little as possible. They don’t look beyond their noses to see what else could be done, they take no initiative, are not willing to go any extra miles.
A Christian in the workplace should be like the ant: self-motivated, willing to dig in and get the work done without prompting, without constant supervision. Does your manager trust you? Can she or he be assured you will diligently do your job whether anyone’s watching or not? Certainly, a Christian should have that kind of reputation.
You know, your witness on your job will be effective if there is a difference in the way you work. If you have the “it’s not my job” attitude that is prevalent today, if you drag your feet and do only what you’re told to do, if you gripe and complain about doing anything above and beyond your job description, how will your coworkers and management know Christ makes a difference in your life? They won’t, and your verbal witness, if there is one, will fall on deaf ears.
If you are a Christ-follower, you have a power far beyond yourself to motivate you. You have God’s Holy Spirit dwelling within you to give you the strength you need to be self-motivated. And when you are motivated to do what’s right, you will have an outstanding testimony because you do your work right whether anyone’s watching or not, you do it to the best of your ability, and you’re willing to go the extra mile.
Go to the ant and consider its ways. We can learn wisdom and self-motivation from those tiny ants.
There is a book in the Bible that is just full of wisdom for our everyday lives, and that is the book of Proverbs. I’m going to share a proverb a day, which will show you the way! We’ll look at five different proverbs and see the wisdom that is there for us. I encourage you to make Proverbs a daily reading habit. There are 31 chapters, so it’s easy to read the chapter that corresponds to the day of the month. I’ve been doing that for several years and find the practical advice has been most beneficial in my life.
Today let’s look at Proverbs 22:10. It says, drive out the mocker and out goes strife; quarrels and insults are ended. Another translation reads, drive out the scoffer and contention will go out. Even strife and dishonor will cease.
Have you ever worked with a person who was a mocker and a scoffer? That’s the person who makes fun of others, who ridicules people and organizations, who is arrogant and causes problems seemingly on purpose. When there’s a mocker in the group, the work environment can be pretty miserable.
This proverb says by getting rid of a mocker, you get rid of strife. If you are in a management position, it’s good to remember there are times when the best thing you can do is to let an employee go. Now, I hope that doesn’t sound cruel, but a person who is intent on offending others—and some people are—can have very detrimental effects on an organization.
Of course, as Christians, we still must care about people regardless of how unlovable they are. And though we can never change people, the Holy Spirit can, so we shouldn’t give up praying for them. But that doesn’t mean we allow them to ruin the working environment for everyone else. Remember, the workplace is not a rehab center or a counseling office. We want to help people, when possible, but you don’t hire people to reform or change them; you hire them to do a job.
Solomon said, in his wisdom, you’re better off to drive out the mocker and the scoffer, for by so doing, the strife and dishonor will stop, people will be able to work productively together, and everyone will benefit, including the person who is the troublemaker. Allowing him or her to continue to get by with inappropriate behavior doesn’t help that individual.
Presented by Lisa Bishop
About a year ago I was heading to dinner with a friend, and as we were about to get in her car, I noticed she opened her door without a key. She just grabbed the door handle, and the vehicle was magically unlocked. To my amazement, I blurted out, “Wow, that’s so cool! You can open your door without using the key.” Surprised by my excitement, my friend looked at me a bit strangely and said, “Doesn’t your car do that?” I confidently replied, “No, but I wish it did.”
Well, fast forward to the next day when I’m getting ready to hop in my car. Instead of clicking my key fob, I decided to reach for the door handle to see if my car had the same key-free superpower. To my surprise, I heard a “click,” and just like that, the door was unlocked with my key still in my pocket. Now, as I tell you this story, I am aware you may be thinking it’s rather odd that I am just figuring this out. But the truth is I had my car for four years yet had no clue of this amazing capability. Yes, I know, somewhat embarrassing. The power to unlock the door key-free was always there. I just didn’t know it, and because I was unaware, I was unable to experience the benefits that were mine to enjoy and appreciate.
So, what does this have to do with the Holy Spirit? Now before you think I am reducing the Holy Spirit to some superpower at our disposal, that is not the point. The point is, just like I was unaware of the power of technology right under my nose, we often neglect the presence and power of the Holy Spirit who is in us and at work in all who have surrendered their lives to love and follow Jesus. If you are a Christian, the moment you accepted Jesus as your Lord and Savior you received the gift of the Holy Spirit.
The Holy Spirit is the third person of the Trinity, and while humanly there is no way to perfectly and completely understand the Trinity, the Bible is clear that the one true God exists eternally in three persons: Father, Son, and Spirit. We often neglect the Holy Spirit. Sadly, many churches do not talk about or acknowledge him, and many Christians are not aware of his power and presence in their lives. Let me be the first to say I am not an expert on the Holy Spirit, but I have grown in my encounters with him and my relationship with him over the years. I have experienced his love and power at work in my life. So, I want to deepen our understanding of who the Holy Spirit is and his role in the life of every believer.
One of the first things to note is that the Holy Spirit did not first show up on the scene in the New Testament. The opening lines of Genesis tell us that the Spirit existed in the beginning. Genesis 1:1-2 says, In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters.
The Holy Spirit was at work in specific people in the Old Testament, and we see his presence and power working in and through people all throughout the New Testament. He existed all along. Notice how I said, “He.” The Holy Spirit is a person, not an “it.” The Bible teaches that the Holy Spirit has all the attributes of personality and is not merely an impersonal force. In the Gospel of John, Jesus spoke of the Holy Spirit as “He.” Jesus also referred to the Holy Spirit as the Comforter or the Counselor. And we know from Scripture that in addition to many other attributes, the Holy Spirit gives hope, convicts people of sin, exhorts, comforts, strengthens, intercedes, and encourages. An impersonal force cannot do this, but the Holy Spirit, God himself, can. When we experience the presence of the Holy Spirit we are experiencing the very presence of God.
In John 16:7, 12-13 we hear the words of Jesus as he prepares the disciples for his departure from earth. He tells them, But very truly I tell you, it is for your good that I am going away. Unless I go away, the Advocate will not come to you; but if I go, I will send him to you. …..I have much more to say to you, more than you can now bear. But when he, the Spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all the truth.
Jesus assures his disciples that his divine presence will continue to dwell within them even after his physical departure from the world. And the same is true for you. If you are born again, the Holy Spirit dwells in you.
1 Corinthians 3:16 says, Don’t you know that you yourselves are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit dwells in your midst?
The Holy Spirit is your advocate, he is your helper, and he provides the ability for every follower of Jesus to have a constant, personal, immediate, indwelling connection, and communication with God. Throughout the Bible, the Holy Spirit equips people for ministry, gives people specific insight and wisdom, teaches people how to interpret God’s Word, communicates with the Father on people’s behalf, and empowers Christians, you and me, to live according to God’s design.
But just because the Holy Spirit dwells in you does not mean you are living a Spirit-filled and empowered life. We can grieve the Holy Spirit. As Ephesians 4:30 warns us, And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Satan’s chief strategy is to get us to grieve the Spirit whether by sexual immorality or a bitter attitude.
1 Thessalonians 5:19, 21-22 says, Do not quench the Spirit….Hold on to what is good, reject every kind of evil.
To quench the Holy Spirit means to stifle or suppress his divine influence in our lives. This happens when we sin. That is why as followers of Jesus we are to hold onto what is good and abstain from evil. These passages do not imply that the Holy Spirit leaves us, but that he is sorrowful because of our sinful actions. The grieving and quenching of the Spirit does not nullify our salvation, it does hinder our fellowship with him and limits our ability to experience the fullness and freedom of the Spirit-filled life that Jesus died to give you and me.
In Ephesians 5:18-19 the apostle Paul teaches about being filled with the Holy Spirit. Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit, speaking to one another with psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit.
Being filled is different from the indwelling of the Holy Spirit we receive at salvation (John 14:16-17).
We can hinder or stifle the work of the Spirit in our lives through rebellion against God, disobedience, or delayed obedience. Your sins are forgiven, but they are also offensive to God. The Holy Spirit still dwells in you, but his power is not realized in and through you.
When we give in to temptations and worldly desires, think and act in ways that do not honor God, and live as we did before accepting Christ’s salvation, we inhibit God’s Spirit from guiding and influencing our behavior. We become numb to his presence. Think about any close relationship you currently have, a friend, family member, spouse, kid, or co-worker. If you act in hurtful, dismissive, or harmful ways, that damages and hinders your relationship with them. Your connection is compromised. The same is true with the Holy Spirit.
When we sin, we should confess to God and renew our commitment to walk in holiness. Ask the Holy Spirit to fill you daily as you yield your will to him and give him control over every part of your life—your thoughts, emotions, will, body, and actions. When you do, you will experience a harmonious relationship with God.
Paul talks about the power of the Holy Spirit at work through his life. He wanted his life to be a demonstration of the power of God. In 1 Corinthians 2:1-5 he says, When I came to you, I did not come with eloquence or human wisdom as I proclaimed to you the testimony about God. For I resolved to know nothing while I was with you except Jesus Christ and him crucified. I came to you in weakness with great fear and trembling. My message and my preaching were not with wise and persuasive words, but with a demonstration of the Spirit’s power,so that your faith might not rest on human wisdom, but on God’s power.
How we live our lives is supposed to be proof of the power of the Spirit at work in us and through us. How many times have you counted on your strength rather than relying on the power of God? I know I have more times than I would like to admit. We go in our own strength when we take matters into our own hands and do not let the hand of God intervene, give us wisdom, guide us, create a way, and carry us through our circumstances.
When we attune ourselves to God’s Spirit, we resist the urge to rely on our human strength.
We can turn up our sensitivity to his voice and presence by spending time in the Word, prayer, quiet time, and worship. I know we have all heard this before, but are we making it a regular practice to be sensitive to, and experience God’s presence? When we meditate on God’s Word, we grow to know him more intimately and heighten our ability to discern his voice. Our wisdom and discernment enlarge. This is a vital practice of living the fully empowered life that is yours in Christ.
A question to ask ourselves is, “Do we live our lives in pursuit of greater synchronicity with the voice of the Holy Spirit or are we more adjusted to the ways of the world?” What if we relied on the Holy Spirit as much as we did on Siri. How many times do we say, “Hey Siri” or “Hey Alexa,” throughout the day? What if instead we said, “Hello Holy Spirit, speak to me,” and sought his voice?
I desire my life to be inexplicable apart from the work of the Holy Spirit, don’t you? I want my life to look different because I live differently, reliant on and submitted to his leading. Our lives honor God when we let go and surrender the smallness of our limited abilities with the desire to give glory and honor to his greatness. This begs the question, “What do you and I need to let go of to fully take hold of Jesus and the power of his Spirit?” Maybe it’s releasing pride, self-sufficiency, fear, superiority, fierce independence, or control. Or perhaps it’s being free from our attachment to idols; life’s comfort, physical pleasure, status at work, or wealth. Those things that crowd our need for God’s comfort, power, and presence. Where do you need to give the Holy Spirit full access to your life? The Spirit’s power is not casually available at your fingertips—to hear his voice and experience his power in your life requires your faithfulness.
I want to share a quote from, The Forgotten God, by Francis Chan. He says:
Without Him (the Holy Spirit) people operate in their own strength and only accomplish human-sized results. The world is not moved by love or actions that are of human creation. And the church is not empowered to live differently from any other gathering of people without the Holy Spirit. But when Believers live in the power of the Spirit, the evidence in their lives is supernatural. The church cannot help but be different and the world cannot help but notice[1].
Let’s reflect and ask ourselves, “Is my life a witness to the power of the Holy Spirit?” In your quiet time every morning, are you building the habit of asking the Holy Spirit, “What do you want me to know today? What do you want me to see? What is my assignment? Help me to see people, myself, and situations through your eyes. Help me to hear with your ears, speak with your words, and love with your heart.” Let’s pray this prayer together and see how the Holy Spirit answers.
There is so much more to learn about the Holy Spirit. We have not even scratched the surface, but I hope this has inspired you to learn more about him, grow more in your relationship with him and live a Spirit-filled and empowered life through him.
[1] Chan, F., & Beuving, M. (2010). Remembering the Forgotten God. David C Cook.
Presented by Lisa Bishop
Does your prayer life feel weak? We have been exploring the work of the Holy Spirit in our lives and today we’ll wrap up by looking to God’s Word to power up our prayer life.
I don’t know about you but sometimes my prayer life can be really puny. There are times I just go about my day and forget to pray for God’s supernatural wisdom and power. Other times I feel like my prayers are a broken record, and I simply don’t know what to say. Have you ever felt that way?
There is good news! When you are at a loss for words, this is what Romans 8:26b-28 says,
We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God. And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose (Romans 8:26b-28).
When you do not know exactly how you should pray, or can barely squeak out a prayer, God himself (through the Holy Spirit) helps you and prays on your behalf. And he prays for you in a way that guarantees all things will work together for your good.
There is no other God like our God! Whatever you are facing, ask the Holy Spirit to intercede on your behalf; his prayer for you will make a way through.
As we end our time, I want to pray Paul’s prayer in Ephesians 3 over you. If you can, and feel comfortable, open your hands, palms up in a position of receiving this blessing from the Lord.
For this reason, I kneel before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen (Ephesians 3:14-21).
Presented by Lisa Bishop
We have been exploring the work of the Holy Spirit in our lives, and we’ll wrap up with a reminder about his presence in your life.
King David wrote Psalm 139 as a prayer and praise to God, acknowledging the Holy Spirit’s personal presence in his life.
Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast (Psalm 139 7-10).
God was with David in his lowest moments and most magnificent victories. The same is true for you. No matter what, God is always with you, my friend. In your greatest joys and in your seasons of sorrow, disappointment, fear, or despair. In your highest of highs and your darkest moments, the Holy Spirit embraces you, surrounds you on all sides, and covers you. Even in the seasons of waiting where you sense his silence and wonder if he hears you, he does. Don’t let your feelings fool you. God is always near to you. Let that sink in.
If you are in a season of feeling God is silent, don’t fear this time. There have been several times in my life where I have felt like God was silent, times when I desperately wanted an answer or direction. What I needed to be reminded of is that even though God seems silent, he is still present. In those seasons of silence, we need to ask ourselves, “Will I keep pressing on and pursuing Christ and Christ-likeness when life appears stagnant? When I don’t feel like I am progressing in my career, my vocation, in life?”
In those times when we have a hard time sensing his presence perhaps, we are progressing in what is most important, trusting God and becoming more like him, as we wait for the timing of his response to our deepest inquiries and longing for direction.
I’m not sure what circumstances you currently find yourself in, but I pray you not only remember the Holy Spirit is present, but you experience the nearness and companionship of God’s Spirit. Take time right now to acknowledge him and thank him for his closeness, that in this moment he is grasping your hand with kindness, love, and tenderness.
Holy Spirit, we thank you that you are always with us and guiding us. Help us to experience more of you.
Presented by Lisa Bishop
Is your life a testimony to the power of God at work in you? How do you know if your life is aligned with God’s Spirit? By asking this simple question: Is your life bearing fruit?
In his discourse about living life in the Spirit, Paul speaks these words in Galatians 5:16-17a, 19-25,
… walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh.…The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity, and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions, and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like…But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Against such things, there is no law. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit (Galatians 5:16-17a, 19-25).
If our lives are marked by selfish ambition, impatience, unforgiveness, arrogance at work, or infighting with fellow followers of Jesus, we aren’t producing the fruit we are called to cultivate. We need to resist being overpowered by our fleshly actions and resolve to live by the power of the Holy Spirit.
Not too long ago I felt very wounded by a friend. I could sense the bitterness welling up in my heart as I rehearsed the hurt I felt. But I was determined not to let ill feelings put me in bondage. Romans 8:26 says, the Spirit helps us in our weakness.
I prayed fervently and daily and asked the Holy Spirit to help my mind and heart. And you know what, he did. The Holy Spirit helped me to release the offense. The word help in Greek means to “take hold with another.” In the weakness of your flesh, when you ask him, the Holy Spirit helps you by taking hold of you and intervening, changing your heart, and impacting your actions. I’m so grateful, aren’t you?
The next time you find yourself tempted to lash out, be impatient, hold a grudge, or react with indifference, resentment, or rage, ask the Holy Spirit for help. Pray that he will take over and that the fruit of his Spirit will be evident in your life. As your life bears fruit, you become a strong witness to the power of the Gospel, and the work of the Holy Spirit.
Presented by Lisa Bishop
We are exploring the work of the Holy Spirit in our lives.
God speaks to us. We can hear his voice when we properly position ourselves before him. Not walking in obedience will hinder our ability to be sensitive to the Spirit’s leading. But the more we walk in holiness and earnestly seek him, the more we grow in our ability to hear him.
This is realized when we regularly meditate on God’s Word, spend time in worship and prayer, and intentionally create space in our day to quiet ourselves in his presence. The reality is the Holy Spirit is always guiding you.
In John 16:13-14, Jesus says,
But when he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all the truth. He will not speak on his own; he will speak only what he hears, and he will tell you what is yet to come. He will glorify me because it is from me that he will receive what he will make known to you (John 16:13-14).
When it comes to hearing the Holy Spirit, heed Jesus’s words when he says, “He will glorify me.” The Holy Spirit will never speak anything contrary to the Word of God and the teachings of Jesus. That is why it is so vital you study the Bible and continue to learn to discern God’s character. Years ago, I met with a young woman who was dating a married man at work. When I confronted her, she said she prayed about it and was convinced God told her the man was the one she was supposed to marry. How greatly deceived she was. The Holy Spirit will not go against scripture. Sometimes we want something so badly we try to convince ourselves God approves when he doesn’t. Don’t be duped. He will never lead you down paths of unrighteousness.
James 1:5 teaches us,
If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you (James 1:5).
When you attune yourself to the Holy Spirit you will experience gentle nudges or impressions that direct you to do something, and help you make discerning decisions, always in alignment with the Bible. There have been times when I have asked God for wisdom and he will highlight a song, a sermon, or something somebody says. Often the Holy Spirit will prompt me to send a text of encouragement to a friend. I can’t tell you the number of times someone responded grateful and astounded because the timing of my text was perfectly aligned with what they needed to hear at that moment. I love how the Holy Spirit works, don’t you?
Let’s make it a habit to seek the Holy Spirit and ask him to guide us in wise living. Because the truth is, he loves to lead you.
Presented by Lisa Bishop
We are examining the work of the Holy Spirit in our lives, and we’ll look at how the Holy Spirit convicts us of our sin. Hopefully, that didn’t just make you want to tune out.
Being convicted of sin doesn’t necessarily sound like something to get excited about, but when God sheds light on your sin the purpose is for you to live in greater harmony with him. As we surrender our lives to God and walk in obedience (another word that can make us cringe), the Holy Spirit begins to renew and rewire our minds and realign our affections, and that’s a good thing.
Bible teacher Priscilla Shirer says this, “After salvation, because of the Holy Spirit, certain kinds of activities, thoughts, or attitudes don’t feel comfortable to you anymore, even if they did before. Something you may have once done without concern now feels wrong and problematic—increasingly so over time. Participating in certain behaviors, entertaining certain habits, and engaging in certain relationships may become awkward and difficult with little apparent reason. Other than this: God’s Spirit is infiltrating your soul—influencing you, molding you. Your conscience is being conformed into the image of Christ.”
When you become a follower of Jesus and order your life after him, your tastebuds change. Things that once were appealing lose their luster when we chase after Christ. As you continue to align your life with Jesus, you will become less and less captivated by your flesh and more conformed to Christ where truth is found. The Holy Spirit’s conviction is for your sanctification; to get your attention so that you, as 1 Peter 1:14-16 says,
Do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: “Be holy, because I am holy” (1 Peter 1:14-16).
When the Holy Spirit exposes your sin, don’t fight against his conviction. If you ignore and override his voice, over time you will become desensitized to him. The Holy Spirit never points things to be punitive. Remember he loves you and wants you to free you from sin, so you live life to the fullest in him.
Let me begin by reading the passage from Colossians 3, verses 12-15.
Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.
These are the garments we should be wearing as Christians: compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, patience, tolerance, forgiveness, peace, thankfulness, and love. And as I said in part one, these are the fruit of the Spirit of God—evidence of God’s Spirit in you.
Here’s the good news about these garments we are to put on—these garments are intended for every believer; they are within your grasp, and they look wonderful on all of us. But the big question is, how do we really put on these beautiful garments? It makes a nice talk, but how does it translate into reality in our lives?
The first thing is to understand that putting on these garments is not an act of our emotions; it is an act of our will. So often in our Christian walk, we want all the feelings before we exercise faith. We want to feel gentle and humble and peaceful and thankful. And if our feelings aren’t working so good on a particular day, then we assume we just can’t wear those garments that day, because we don’t feel them. The sooner we learn that feelings cannot be trusted and are not a barometer of our spiritual temperature, the sooner we’ll be able to take these garments and wear them. And that’s done by faith, not by feelings.
When you know you’re facing a day that will require, for instance, a great deal of patience, keep repeating that you will put on patience for that day. Put it on by faith, regardless of whether you feel patient or not. Your feelings will eventually give up and come along with your will, but never mind them. Will to do God’s will. He will supply the patience when you need it if you don’t allow your emotions to destroy your faith.
You wear these garments by faith, just as you accepted God’s gift of eternal life by faith. The act of your will is your part; God does the rest.
Secondly, wearing this wardrobe is not a function of our personalities. Many of these inner garments probably do not come naturally to your personality. But that does not keep you from wearing all of them.
I think that we often let ourselves off the hook by saying, “Well, that’s just the way I am. I can’t be anyone else; I have to be myself.” We’ve been fed this current philosophy of “be your own person” so much that we use that idea to excuse ourselves from whatever we feel doesn’t “fit” us.
Well, I can’t see where God makes any exceptions for personality. He has all the garments you can ever need, and he’s ready to impart them to you. Don’t let your personality or “the way you are” be an excuse for not making God’s best dressed list. It is possible—through Christ—for all believers to wear this entire wardrobe.
Maybe one reason you haven’t put on too many of these garments is that there just isn’t any room in your closet. Could it be your closet is cluttered with all kinds of outdated, ugly clothes? In the same third chapter of Colossians, we find a list of clothes we should “put off,” and that list includes anger, wrath, malice, slander, abusive speech, and lying (vs. 8).
Do you have any of these ugly clothes in your closet? If so, they are taking up so much room and occupying so much of your time and thoughts that you’re left with little room for the beautiful clothes you need to wear. Are you harboring anger that you refuse to deal with? Anger plus resentment equals wrath. Wearing wrath these days? I can promise you that it is unbecoming. Malice is the desire to see others suffer—wishing bad things to happen to other people. I hope you don’t have malice in your closet, because it is truly overpowering. And then, what comes out of your mouth? Slander, abusive speech, or lying? There is no place in God’s wardrobe for this kind of language or speech.
In Isaiah 61:3 God says he will give us beauty for ashes, joy for mourning, and a garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness. What an incredible offer this is from our heavenly Father! He wants to exchange all those heavy, ugly, dirty clothes now hanging in your inner closet and in return give you beauty and joy and a garment of praise.
That, it seems to me, is an offer too good to refuse! The only thing required is that you be willing to exchange your present unsightly wardrobe for these new garments. You must relinquish the control of your life to the heavenly Father and be willing to take off your present unattractive clothes, hand them over to him, and accept in exchange these beautiful inner garments that he desires to give you.
If you’re going to possess this special wardrobe, you’ll need to prepare a special place for them. It is the closet of prayer, to which Jesus referred when he was teaching his disciples how to pray. May I say quite candidly that you will wear these garments in direct proportion to the quality of your prayer life. Without a “prayer closet,” you’ll find these garments very difficult to keep. And that prayer closet includes God talking to us through his Word, as well as our petitions to him.
If you really want to be a well-dressed Christian and wear all these clothes at once (you won’t be overdressed!), I have a suggestion to help you. Every morning as you get dressed, as you put on your blouse and skirt, your shirt and pants, your jacket and coat, talk to the Lord. You could say something like this: “Lord, while I’m putting on these necessary outer garments, I want you to know that I desire to be your best dressed person. I want to put on compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, patience, peace, thankfulness, tolerance, and love.”
Make a list and tack it on your closet door as a reminder. Memorize the list. And repeat to God every day, using your dressing time as a reminder that you desire to wear these beautiful clothes he has provided. By faith, as you put on your outer garments, you are at the same time putting on these inner clothes.
One of Satan’s best methods to defeat us is forgetfulness. He’ll try to erase your memory and keep you from thinking about God’s inner wardrobe. If you don’t find a method to remind yourself, you’ll be surprised how other things will crowd your mind, and the days will be over before you’ve remembered what you should be wearing. You’ll find that you’ve gone the whole day without the proper clothes. This little routine will help you remember.
After hearing me speak about this, a friend of mine literally took my advice and taped this list of inner garments to her mirror. She told me it was a great help to her, reminding her daily of the most important clothes she should put on. Why don’t you try putting it on your mirror? See if it helps.
In James 1:23-26, we read that a person who simply hears and does nothing about what he or she hears is like a person catching the reflection of his or her own face in a mirror. She sees herself, it is true, but she goes on with whatever she was doing, without the slightest recollection of what sort of person she saw in the mirror.
After we dress each day, the last thing we do is check the mirror—right? To look in the mirror and discover a serious problem with our clothes and then do nothing about the problem is rather ridiculous. The whole purpose in looking in the mirror is to remedy any problem before we go out to face the world.
Colossians 3 is God’s mirror. It shows us what we should wear every day. So, if you look in that mirror regularly, you’ll recognize what garments are missing in your wardrobe. You’ll see some of the inner garments you’ve been wearing are pretty drab and quite heavy. Don’t walk away from God’s mirror without doing something about what you saw. The Bible tells us that to those who know to do good and do it not, to them it is sin.
What happens when you start to take seriously this idea of putting on God’s beautiful clothes on a daily basis? This was the handle God gave me on this truth quite a few years ago, as I struggled with lack of patience and kindness and gentleness in my life. I began practicing this principle daily and continue to, consciously putting on patience and kindness and gentleness, along with the other garments.
Then I began to realize what happened. I became keenly aware of my lack of these things during the day. That’s the first step. As soon as I was unkind, God’s Spirit within me would convict me. That quiet voice of God would say, “Kindness just fell off, Mary. Put it back on, please.” Then I became aware that I was handling situations and people with more compassion than before. I discovered I really cared about their feelings, and I wanted to be kind and gentle.
This is not meant to be just a clever way of talking about the fruit of God’s Spirit. It is rather meant to be a practical way to help you put on these lovely inner garments and watch God transform your life. I challenge you to put on these clothes, by faith, every day.
I’ve been trying to help us see afresh how to be powerhouse Christians and really impact our worlds for Jesus Christ. And, my friends, there is only one way to turn on the power of God in our lives, and it’s not new, it’s not gimmicky, it’s not overnight, and it’s not tantalizing. But it works!
The power switch is prayer and God’s Word. And we must pay the price for this power, just like we pay for electrical power in order to turn on the lights in our houses. The price is discipline, pure lives, and significant time in our schedules to get to know God through prayer and his Word.
Are you in bondage to your own powerless life? Are you frustrated because you never see any evidence that Christ lives in you and gives you power to live victoriously? If you’re truly a believer, you’ve got to get back to basics and ask yourself if you’ve been willing to pay the price for power. And believe me, I have to do the same thing.
There’s a price to pay, but wow, you get more than you pay for when you turn on God’s power in your life. For example, have you been in bondage to your tongue? Well, with God’s power you can have victory over that damaging tongue of yours. Or maybe there is some impurity in your life holding you prisoner.
A friend told me how she had been in bondage to trashy novels, reading as many as one a day for years. This had done a great deal of damage to her thought life and her marriage, but by memorizing scripture and praying it into her life, she has broken that bondage and gotten rid of those lousy novels. You think you can read or watch the world’s trash and it won’t do you any harm? Think again. It will keep your life impure, but thankfully my friend found freedom from the trash. Truth—the truth of God’s Word—set her free! She paid the price for God’s power, and now she is free.
If you’re struggling in some area, I urge you to pay the price for God’s power to be released in your life.
Galatians 5:16 says: So, I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. Walking by the Spirit is the way to know freedom, to have the power to live a godly life. Make it a matter of daily prayer and a commitment each day—I will by God’s grace walk by the Spirit today. You will begin to know power in your life that will amaze you!
I’m examining how to turn the power switch on. Suppose you knew everything about your computer there is to know—a real computer whiz—but you didn’t have any idea how to turn it on. What good would it do you to have all that computer know-how if you couldn’t turn on the computer?
Well, as silly as that sounds, many of us Christians have never learned how to turn on the switch that allows us to be powerful for God. We have this incredible source of power within us—the Holy Spirit of God. Yet we don’t know how to turn on the switch. Or could it be we don’t want to?
You see, the switch that turns on God’s power in our lives is prayer and God’s Word. You probably know that but are you willing to use those power tools? Maybe you’re looking for easier answers. Or something different—or something that gives a quicker fix.
Let me explain. In order to have electricity in your house, you have to pay your bill. Have you noticed—the power company is very insistent about regular payments. But we do it because we want the power; our lives are much better with electricity in our homes. So, we pay the price.
There’s a price to pay if you want to be a powerful Christian. The power is there, but you must be willing to pay the price.
Therefore, since we have these promises, dear friends, let us purify ourselves from everything that contaminates body and spirit, perfecting holiness out of reverence for God (2 Corinthians 7:1).
Have nothing to do with godless myths and old wives’ tales; rather, train yourself to be godly (1 Timothy 4:7).
You must purify yourself and train yourself. That’s your job, and until you’re willing to pay that price, the power just doesn’t come on in your life. There are no shortcuts here. What is contaminating your body and spirit? Television? Wrong reading material? A judgmental attitude? A loose tongue that speaks in anger and haste? Those are some of the more common things that can contaminate our bodies and spirits. We must clean them out if we want to have power.
Then we have to have a training program for ourselves: A disciplined life that makes time for prayer and Bible study and fellowship with God’s people. That’s how we train to be godly, and when we are willing to pay the price, then the power comes on in our lives. It’s just that simple. I didn’t say easy, but it is simple. You want to be powerful for God; pay the price and you’ll discover how incredible it is to have his power flowing through you to others day in and day out.
When was the last time you had a power outage at your house? It's the strangest feeling, isn't it, as you flip on all those switches, but nothing happens. All your electrical conveniences and appliances are useless without power. Sometimes as Christians we live as though there's a power outage. We've got a powerhouse within us because of the Holy Spirit who indwells our bodies, but maybe we just don't know how to turn on the switch.The switch that turns on God's divine power within us is to use the divine weapons we have been given.For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds (2 Corinthians 10:3-5).Have you been using your divinely empowered weapons? What are these weapons: Prayer is a divine weapon. You probably know that, but the question is, how much do you pray? Studies show the average Christian prays less than five minutes per day. Prayer is our major power source. Maybe you haven't learned how to pray. What are you doing to become more effective in your prayer life? You can take the prayer given by Jesus to use as a model for your own prayer life. I've developed a Prayer Journal to help you apply that prayer format in a very practical way, and you can find it on our website or contact us for information on it, if it would be helpful to you. The Word of God is another divine weapon. Hebrews 4:12 tells us for the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. Have you learned how to use this divine weapon, this powerhouse we have because we have the Bible?For example, quoting Scripture is a great way to turn on the power in your life. I encourage you to memorize scripture as much as possible. Join our Hidden Word team, where together we memorize a verse each week.When you know you are weak in a certain area, such as impure thoughts or lying or having a critical spirit, memorize verses that relate to those matters and quote them often to yourself throughout the day. You will be amazed at how that will empower you to have victory over those problems.So, if you've been powerless in your spiritual life lately, maybe you just haven't been using these divine weapons—prayer and the Word of God. They are the switches that turn on the power, and you can have access to the power any time you're willing to use your divine weapons.
Do you feel powerless? Can you see evidence in your life of real inner power? You can have an incredible power system right within you. In fact, if you're a believer you have that power system already, but you may never have learned how to turn it on.We saw Jesus told us we will have power when we have the Holy Spirit. What does this power enable us to do?First, it enables us to be children of God. John wrote to all who did receive him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God (John 1:12).Second, we can pray with power. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective (James 5:16).Third, we can speak words of power. My message and my preaching were not with wise and persuasive words, but with a demonstration of the Spirit's power... (1 Corinthians 2:4).Fourth, we can have a powerful mind. For who has known the mind of the Lord that he may instruct him? But we have the mind of Christ (1 Corinthians 2:16).Fifth, we can demolish our enemy and have victory over sin. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds (2 Corinthians 10:4).Oh, there are so many more. We have the power to: endure and be strong (Colossians 1:11), no longer be timid or weak, but be bold for Jesus (2 Timothy 1:7). live holy and godly lives (2 Peter 1:3).Does that describe you? If not and you are a believer, it may be because you're just not turning on the power that is within you—the power of the Holy Spirit.Suppose you never turned on the power in your house. You have light bulbs and lamps; you have a washer and dryer and a vacuum cleaner. But you never have light or clean clothes or clean floors because you've never learned how to turn on the power. Silly thought, isn't it? Well, it's just as ridiculous for us to have the power of the Holy Spirit but never see the evidence of it in our lives.
A term we hear a lot these days is empowerment. We're told when a person feels empowered, then they are motivated; they are capable of being all they can be. I certainly agree we need to be empowered, but my question this week is, how do we turn on the power?New age philosophy says we need to simply get in touch with the unlimited power within us. It tries to convince us we can be anything we want to be, do anything we want to do if we believe in ourselves. That's how you turn on the power.Many people have bought into this—even Christians—because it sounds good, and it caters to our desire for control. But if you've been trying to turn the power on yourself, you've discovered it just doesn't always work. Your internal self-powerhouse is often out of service or overloaded or has frequent power failures.No, just as light fixtures and light bulbs are useless without electrical power, we need some outside power source flowing to us and through us if we're ever going to turn the power on. The truth of Scripture is there is only one ultimate source of power. All power rests in the hands of the Creator, who has chosen to share it on terms he alone controls. He has a monopoly and if you want to turn the power on in your life, you have to go to the source, the Eternal God who has all power.After his resurrection before ascending into heaven, Jesus told his disciples: "You will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you...” Please note he didn't say, "You have power in yourselves to conquer the world. Just look within yourselves and be the best you can be.” No, he said, power will be given to you from an outside source. And incredibly, that power source is going to dwell in your body.When and how do we get this Holy Spirit power? Romans 8:9 tells us if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he does not belong to Christ.Every true believer has received the Holy Spirit; it happens when we believe in Jesus Christ. So, we have the powerhouse within us because he is within us. It's not our personal power; it's the power of the Holy Spirit, located right inside of us.But I find sometimes I never turn the power on, or I run on very low wattage—how about you?
I remember so well the time God implanted this truth about being properly dressed in my heart. It came as a discipline in my own life, and it has been life-changing for me. It's something we can remember and relate to, and so I want to share it with you, praying that God will use it in your life, as he has and does in mine.The wardrobe that I want to talk about is found in Colossians the third chapter:Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful (Colossians 3:12-15).These are the special garments intended by God for each of us to wear, and as Christians, we have a unique opportunity to be lights in our working worlds, in our families, and everywhere we go by learning how to wear these beautiful clothes. Let's look more closely at these inner garments which we need to "put on."COMPASSION: This can be described as a deep feeling of sharing the suffering of another. You know, it's not hard to find suffering people these days. There is mental, physical, and emotional suffering everywhere, and undoubtedly you have suffering people all around you where you work and live. Are you aware of their suffering?It seems to me that all too often I am quick to blame people and judge them without stopping to think of what they have endured, or why they are the way they are. That's especially easy to do at our jobs. If you’re not careful, you can judge your fellow workers without really understanding their suffering.Let me assure you that compassion will look good on your job. If you wear it, you won't be so quick to condemn or judge. You'll give people room to make mistakes. Your prayer list will get longer because when you care about people, you pray for them. I encourage you to pray for the people you work with. When you do, you’ll discover that you feel much more compassionate toward them. Yes, indeed, we need to wear compassion on our jobs.KINDNESS: Kindness is the second garment in the closet of a well-dressed Christian. Have you been too busy to wear kindness lately? Maybe, like me, you take it on and off, depending on your mood, or who you're with. Sometimes we are least kind to the people nearest to us. We seem to forget that it’s important to be kind to those people we work with every day. Sometimes we seem to save our kind behavior for people we don't see very often, as though it were in short supply. God has plenty of it, so wear it to work every day. You'll look terrific!HUMILITY: Third in this special wardrobe is humility. The world often gives negative connotations to humility, as though it were an undesirable characteristic. It is often viewed as weakness or wimpy. Rarely do we think of humility as a necessity for getting to the top in the business world.But that's an incorrect assessment of true humility. The Bible defines humility as a lack of pride and an awareness of who we are in comparison to who God is. God hates pride; it's the number one sin at the top of the list of things he hates. One of the indicators of humility is a teachable attitude. The person who is always willing to learn, to change, to take good advice is a truly humble person.GENTLENESS: And then we come to gentleness. I am always overwhelmed with the amazing gentleness of Jesus Christ. Oh, how we need to wear his gentleness every day. We need that gentle and quiet spirit, which the Apostle Peter tells us should be our adornment, and which is precious in the sight of God.Are your words tough or harsh on your job or at home? Do you have a sharp tongue or hasty actions that pierce and hurt people b...
Presented by Lisa BishopWe have been examining why our words matter, and we’ll wrap up with the power of an apology—how admitting our faults and taking ownership of our misgivings is a worthwhile way to use our words.The power of an apology is a profound aspect of Christian living. It takes courage and maturity to acknowledge your mistakes, take responsibility for your actions, and seek forgiveness. When you apologize sincerely, you demonstrate humility. In a world where people are quick to point fingers and place blame, admitting guilt will separate you from the crowd. After all, as a follower of Jesus, you are meant to live a life set apart from the practices of the culture around you, and instead conduct yourself with Christlike character.Who is someone you need to apologize to? Who needs to hear you say the words, “I was wrong.” I know you may feel a lump in your throat or even have an allergic reaction to those words. We sometimes falsely believe admitting a mistake shows a sign of weakness or will in some weird way give others power over us. But that is not true. Listen, saying you were wrong is not a sign of weakness; it’s a sign of strength. An apology has the power to mend broken relationships and restore trust. It can open the door to meaningful conversations and opportunities for growth.It’s important to note that when you humble yourself and offer a heartfelt apology, you are not only saying you are sorry, but you are also demonstrating regret and your commitment to make a conscious effort to change your behavior. If you apologize and then neglect to change, you will lose credibility fast, and your future words of remorse will be rendered meaningless. A flippant apology adds insult to injury. We need to be truly sorry for our actions or words. It is important you do not offer excuses for your actions, and you are specific in your apology. If you lost your temper with someone and said hurtful words, it might sound something like this: “I am sorry for losing my temper today and saying things I should not have said. I realize my words were hurtful, and that is not the kind of person I want to be.”Now, you may be trying to get off the hook and be thinking of all of the reasons the other person is wrong. But this is not about them, this is about you and the part you played in causing hurt or conflict. Fessing up to your mistakes is a function of your integrity. You’re admitting that you are not the person you want to be, and you are a work in progress. As Romans 3:23 says, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. Who will you apologize to today?
Presented by Lisa BishopHave your words ever gotten you in hot water? We have been examining why our words matter and I want to turn our attention to a powerful piece of wisdom from Proverbs.Those who guard their mouths and their tongues keep themselves from calamity (Proverbs 21:23).Now we can acknowledge this is practical advice for everyday living, right? Yet if we are honest, we can blow by these pearls of wisdom and be careless with our words.When have your words gotten you into trouble? Maybe it was something you said about a co-worker or friend, and it got back to them. Or maybe it was an inappropriate outburst of disapproval in a meeting. In our daily lives we all encounter situations that test our patience, tempt us to react impulsively, and speak without considering the consequences. However, Proverbs is a clear warning to be intentional about guarding our mouths and tongues, reminding us that exercising restraint leads to positive outcomes.When you refrain from speaking words that can cause harm such as gossip, lies, or hurtful remarks, you are kept from unnecessary trouble and distress. Remember that once words are spoken, they cannot be taken back, and they can have lingering impact. When you are mindful of what you say, you will minimize conflicts and misunderstandings.Guarding our tongues goes beyond verbal communication. Social media posts, texts, and instant messages can greatly influence how other people perceive us. Use discretion and integrity in all forms of communication. Filter your words through Ephesians 4:29 which says,Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen (Ephesians 4:29).Exercising self-control with your words will lead to a life protected from unnecessary troubles and conflicts. Using wisdom will keep you from saying something that grieves God and from situations you will later regret. By choosing your words carefully and speaking with kindness you honor God and make a positive contribution to the well-being of those around you.When you do mess up with your words, quickly own it. Don’t make excuses, admit your mishap. Humbly ask for forgiveness.Instead of lashing out, lavish people with life-giving words. Make every effort to guard your mouth so you can keep a clear conscience and be free from needless quarrels.
Presented by Lisa BishopDo your words betray, or do they build up? We are taking a close look at our words, and why what we say matters. Now, I know we are aware that the words coming out of our mouths have an impact, and we also know as followers of Jesus, we are held to an even higher holy standard. Yet, minding our mouths can be a challenge. We don’t always think before we speak. This is a friendly reminder to make sure you train and discipline yourself to choose your words wisely.One way to filter your words is through the lens of motive. What I mean is this. What are you trying to accomplish with your words? What is your intent? Is it positive or potentially destructive? I was reading the Gospel of Luke the other day. When I came to the account of Judas betraying Jesus, verse 4 stood out to me.And Judas went to the chief of priests and the officers of the temple guard and discussed with them how he might betray Jesus (Luke 22:4).Judas used his words to backstab and be disloyal to Jesus and Judas’ words ultimately caused death.The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit (Proverbs 18:21).You will reap the fruit of your words whether they are life-giving or life-taking. In the hustle and bustle of our work environments, it’s easy to underestimate the impact of our words. We often focus on tasks, deadlines, and goals, forgetting our words hold immense power. Negative words can bring death to morale, creativity, and productivity. Gossip, criticism, and complaining can create division and hinder progress. When we speak positive and encouraging words and are loyal to the absent, meaning we are not talking behind people’s backs, we breathe life into our colleagues and our workplace. Your words have the potential to build strong relationships, foster teamwork, and create a culture of trust and respect.The words you speak not only give life or death to others, but they also create your legacy. As we read the New Testament, Judas’s legacy was one of betrayer. How would you like your name to be in a book that billions of people will read with that type of reputation? Not me! The point is this, people will remember the words you say, and those words impact your reputation. What will people say about your character when they remember you? Let’s choose to build people up and remember to use our words wisely.
Presented by Lisa BishopWhat is your self-talk? We are examining why our words matter. Let’s look at the words we speak to ourselves about ourselves.Stop and think about it. What are the words you find yourself saying to yourself? Your self-talk is the ongoing conversation you have with yourself in your mind. Negative self-talk includes thoughts such as, “I’m worthless,” “I’ll never be good enough,” “I just can’t seem to get it right,” or “I’m so stupid,” as well as thoughts about your circumstances, “I’ll be stuck in this job forever” or “Things will never get better.”We all hold these kinds of ongoing conversations with ourselves, and although you might not always be aware of it, your internal conversations have a significant impact on your mood, your behaviors, and ultimately your life. Sometimes we entertain negative thoughts because of what others have said to us.We’ve been called stupid, ugly, worthless, or worse—and when we hit a low point in our lives, these are the very words we hear on repeat in our minds. Like a hamster wheel, many of us get caught up in negative self-talk. Your words matter not only for you and your life but the words you speak to yourself also matter to God. The latest brain research shows that negative language actually releases thousands of stress-producing hormones and neurotransmitters in our brains, powerfully affecting our moods, making us feel worse and ultimately, they result in acting in ways that justify our false beliefs.This is no surprise to God, our great creator who designed our brains, and his Word shows us the power of guiding our thoughts. Ephesians 4:23 tells us to be made new in the attitude of your minds. And Romans 12:2 says, do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.The enemy wants nothing more than to infiltrate your thoughts with lies. You must fight back with God’s Word and speak the truth to yourself, even when, or especially when, you don’t feel like it. This is more than positive self-talk; this is the Holy Spirit-powered truth.Begin to examine your defeating thoughts. What fears or false beliefs have become a stronghold in your life? What words do you dwell on and do you pummel yourself with? Ask yourself, “Are these thoughts in alignment with God?” If the thoughts are negative or in any way shaming or condemning, you know for certain the answer is “no.” Getting unstuck from old patterns of thinking will take effort on your part because thoughts become habits and habits can be hard to break. But you can choose the thoughts you entertain about yourself, and as you do, remember to ask God to help you.
Presented by Lisa BishopWhat is your heart full of? We are examining why our words matter; and why what we say is important as followers of Jesus.In Luke 6:43-45, Jesus shows what our words expose when he says,No good tree bears bad fruit, nor does a bad tree bear good fruit. Each tree is recognized by its fruit. People do not pick figs from thorn bushes, or grapes from briers. A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of (Luke 6:43-45).Jesus is explaining how we can judge a person’s character. Much like if we were to look at a tree or plant to tell if it is a “good” tree or not, our words show the fruit of our hearts.What does the fruit of your words reveal about the condition of your heart? If you were to take inventory of the conversations and comments that flow from your tongue on a regular basis, what would you notice? When you are at the office, what pours forth from your lips, out loud, or utterances under your breath? When you are at home with your spouse, your kids, or your roommate or interacting with a stranger, what do your words display?We can learn a lot when we pay attention to the words that come out of our mouth. If you find your words are harsh, impatient, laced with anger, self-defeating or deflating, or derogatory toward others, it’s time to examine your heart. Your words reveal what your heart feels and what’s inside you.Your words can be the indicator light that something in your heart needs the healing touch of God.Your heavenly Father wants to minister to the corners of your heart that are producing bad fruit—the places that are angry, bitter, wounded, weary, or hardened. Hear me when I say we all struggle with our words. Different circumstances, seasons, or people will provoke the depths of our soul to surface through our speech. When you stop long enough to observe your words and get curious about where they’re coming from you can get yourself off autopilot and intentionally invite God to search you and help you.One of my favorite prayers comes from Psalm 19:14,May these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, Lord, my rock and my redeemer (Psalm 19:14).As Christians, our hearts have been and are continually being changed by the power of God. And that change is reflected in our words.
As followers of Jesus, it’s easy to get stuck in battles He's already won. I'm Mary Lowman of The Christian Working Woman, and this week, Judy Dunagan, author of The Loudest Roar, will help us understand and live in Christ’s victory. So, join us as we let God’s roar diminish the enemy’s lies to a whisper.
You’ve heard it said there’s no such thing as a free lunch. That sentiment is pretty much on target, except of course for the free salvation which Jesus offers us because he paid the price for our sins. It is free for those of us who accept his offer, but he paid a big price. He made a huge commitment when he said to God, as he prayed in Gethsemane, “Not my will but thine be done.”I’ve been talking all week about finding freedom through commitment. Instead of running away from being committed to something or someone, we need to walk toward those commitments that God wants from us. That’s because committing ourselves to do God’s will is the pathway to real freedom, the freedom of our spirits, the freedom of knowing what we do matters to God.For ten years I decided to run my own show and go for what I wanted. In spite of knowing better, I truly turned my back on following Jesus because I thought that would mean I could never have my way. But let me tell you what my pursuit of freedom led to. It caused me to abandon many Christian principles, which had been faithfully taught to me by my parents, teachers and pastors. It led me to live a very selfish life that was totally focused on what I thought was good for me.Deciding not to be committed to what God wanted for my life caused me to make many poor and sinful choices—choices about relationships, about jobs, about where I lived and who were my friends. It led me to behaviors that were anything but Christ-like, to a lifestyle that blended in with the world around me. It would have been hard to distinguish me as a true believer in Jesus Christ during those years.What I’ve learned—now over 40 years later—is that to refuse to be committed to Christ and his principles for my life is to choose disaster and chaos and total frustration. I thought I was choosing what would make me happy by choosing not to be committed to a Christian lifestyle and living my life for others. But I was so wrong.Now, with all these years under my belt since then, I can tell you a commitment to Jesus Christ is indeed the way to freedom. And that means you commit your weeks and your days and your hours to his control. It means saying yes to what he wants you to do and no to yourself. Yes, there is a price to discipleship and Jesus asks us to count the cost, but the return on your investment is abundant and joyful and fulfilling.
You remember the story of the rich young ruler who came to Jesus and asked what he needed to do to inherit eternal life. Jesus told him he needed to make a commitment: He needed to sell everything he had and give it to the poor, and then come follow Jesus. This young man became very sad when Jesus told him this, and he didn’t follow-through because the commitment was too costly for him.He made a decision not to make a commitment, but notice it made him very sad, not happy. No doubt this was a huge commitment Jesus was asking of him, because Jesus knew money was his god. He couldn’t follow Jesus until he loved Jesus more than money. But Jesus was not asking him to do the impossible, nor was he trying to make his life miserable. Just the opposite. Jesus wanted him to have an abundant life, a life that cannot be bought with money. But he wasn’t willing to make that commitment, and he went away sad.Commitment comes with a price tag, whether it’s a commitment to marry someone, or to take a job, or to work on a committee at church. And we should consider the cost of any commitment we make. But we should not fear commitment just because it has a cost, because commitments are the doorway to finding the freedom we’re looking for.For example, suppose you decide to be committed to reading and studying your Bible more. To make that happen, you commit to some structure you impose on yourself to read the Bible systematically and regularly and to keep a journal of what God says to you as you read. Then you start to reap the benefits of this commitment as you see how God uses his Word to teach you, change you, comfort you and guide you.Maybe you decide it’s finally time to do something about your eating habits, and you make a commitment to eat a healthier diet with fewer calories. Then you have to pay the price of that commitment by not buying junk food, not going to fast-food restaurants, not overeating, and putting veggies and fruits on your menu. When you pay that price, you start to reap the benefits—like, you look better and feel better, you have more energy, you sleep better. Then you realize that commitment is worth the price tag.Perhaps you decide it’s time for you to get more involved in your church, so you sign up for a small group study, and you spend time there weekly. Eventually you offer your home for a study, and that takes a little time and effort, even a little money. But what do you benefit? New friends, a support group, good information poured into your mind, wholesome relationships. It’s a commitment worth the price.There truly is wonderful freedom through being committed.
Freedom through commitment—can that actually be true? We find freedom by making commitments. Think about it: You found freedom from the bondage of sin and the prospect of hell by making a commitment to accept Jesus Christ as your Savior. You found freedom to prepare yourself for the future by committing yourself to get an education. You found freedom to have an income and support yourself when you made a commitment to take a job. Freedom truly comes through commitment.Yet many people find it very difficult to make any kind of a commitment. Why is it so hard? One reason is fear of failure. Someone has said, “Fear of failure and humiliation go a long way in limiting how much someone is willing to risk committing to a course of action.” It’s true that commitment brings with it the possibility of failing, but lack of commitment means you never have a chance to succeed! Of course there will be failures, but the road to success is always lined with some failures. Like all fears, this fear is a tool of the enemy, which he uses very effectively to cripple us and keep us from the good things God wants to do for us and through us.Another reason some find it hard to make commitments is the fear of boredom. We’ve been conditioned to being entertained a lot in our technological society, so the idea that we might have to endure something which is not as much fun or as exciting as something else can paralyze us and prevent our involvement in things that really could be meaningful. And then there’s the reality that we refuse to be committed because we’re lazy and we just don’t want to put out the effort!I think one of the most common reasons people refuse to be committed is we’ve cluttered our lives with so much stuff that we just “don’t have time” to do things that are perhaps much more important. But it’s important to stop and ask yourself why you are so busy that you can’t take on other commitments. Is it because you allowed yourself to be pushed into things that really weren’t what God wanted you to do? Maybe we need to de-commit to some things that really aren’t so important.Is commitment really that necessary, you may ask? Isn’t there something else, something less scary? No, there is no way to be what God intended you to be and do what God intended you to do except by personally committing yourself to something or someone. Sitting on the fence, waiting for something better to come along, and fearing the responsibilities of commitment will not bring you contentment or fulfillment.
As a leader in ministry for many years, I’m aware people are less and less willing to make a commitment. Many wait until the last minute to sign up or agree to help. It can be frustrating, but what is the reason for it?I had a conversation with a young woman in her 20s who was working on her master’s in theology, and she explained her generation doesn’t want to feel chained—her word—to some commitment because they want to feel free to do whatever they want to do at the moment. They want to live without structure and keep their options open.I think her analysis was pretty accurate. It’s an attitude that is prevalent among the younger generation, but believe me, it has crept into the minds of us older people, too. It’s a result of a very egocentric mindset—and we’ve encouraged this kind of thinking with our emphasis on individual rights, individual freedom, individual fulfillment. In other words, we’ve developed a cultural mindset that convinces us it’s all about me, and no doubt that is a key reason for this unwillingness to make commitments to things that might cost us some time or money or work.It is a destructive illusion to believe you are most free when you have fewer commitments. Jesus said truth will set you free, and if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed. All of us long for freedom; it’s in our genes. But so often we just bark up the wrong tree to try to find it. The freedom that will bring satisfaction, contentment, and joy to your life is found in Jesus alone. But that freedom he gives us brings commitment with it, for to be a disciple of Jesus Christ is to relinquish our rights to him and decide we’ll be committed to doing his will.Now, that should affect our everyday lives. When we’re faced with choices, when we’re asked to make commitments, our first thought should be, “What would Jesus want me to do?” We should ask ourselves, “Am I choosing my way or God’s way?”When you took the job you now have, you made a commitment to that organization. Making that commitment gives you a paycheck, which affords you the freedom to pay your bills, buy some food and clothes, and keep yourself from being homeless! In the same way, we make a commitment to accept Jesus as Lord and Savior and enjoy all the incredible benefits he brings into our lives, but it also brings a responsibility to be committed—to give our lives to others, to lose our life in order to find it.
When you first read that phrase—freedom through commitment—it sounds like a contradiction, because we think commitment takes away our freedom. If I make a commitment to marry, I lose my freedom. If I agree to head up that project, I’ll be tied down. If I accept this invitation for Saturday night, something better may come along. If I sign up for that event at church, I may change my mind. How can commitment bring freedom?
Commitment is all about making a choice, and when we choose in one direction, we lose the option to choose in another direction. But what we fail to realize is choosing not to choose is still a choice we make. Deciding not to make a commitment is a decision—and that reluctance to make a commitment takes us down a certain path with its own consequences.
Jesus said, whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it (Matthew 10:39). Jesus was teaching us that if you focus on your freedom and you’re very reluctant to make commitments to anything or anyone because you want to be free, you’re going to lose your life. That means you’re going to lose the real meaning of life; you’re going to lose the real joy of life; you’re going to miss the purpose for which God put you here on earth. But if you’re willing to commit your life to God’s plan—if you lose your life, as Jesus put it—then you will find it. You will find that meaningful, purposeful life that fills you with satisfaction and contentment.
Ephesians 2:10 says, for we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. God intends for each of us who are born from above, to do the good works he planned for us to do, and that means we have to make a commitment. We have to choose one path in life, which precludes us from choosing another. We have to make one decision about what we’ll do this weekend, which means we can’t do something else. We have to say yes to being involved in a ministry, which means we can’t go to the beach that day.
The path of less commitment takes you into a less structured life. While that may sound like freedom, it is explicitly true that people who have structure and thereby commitments as part of their lifestyle have much greater satisfaction and less frustration than those who refuse to make a commitment for fear of losing their freedom. Jesus knew what he was talking about.
Commitment is at low levels these days, and yet it has not brought great joy or abundant life.
Role models. I think we all recognize that the role models in our lives have had a great influence on us. Paul wrote to the Corinthians: Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ (1 Corinthians 11:1). That is the Bible’s definition of role modeling.
Maybe you’re thinking, “Well, sure, the Apostle Paul could say ‘Follow me as I follow Christ.’ After all, he was an apostle, and he was the best Christian who ever lived. But we could never be expected to seriously tell someone to follow us and do like we do, could we?”
Well, the answer is yes; every Christian should be that kind of a godly role model. I would imagine some of you have never thought of yourself as a role model or a leader. Maybe that’s because you’re still young, you are not an assertive person, or you don’t have leadership gifts. But all of us are role models, and there are people in your life whom you influence. Therefore, we all have a responsibility as believers to make sure we are godly role models.
I know that’s a tall assignment, but we who are born from above have the power of the Holy Spirit within us. We don’t have to do this on our own. God will enable us to become godly role models. However, I believe we do need to take our role modeling responsibilities seriously and consciously work at being better role models.
Godly role modeling is the natural result of a normal, growing walk with Jesus. In 2 Corinthians 3:18 we see that we are being transformed into the likeness of Jesus with ever-increasing glory. So, if our lives as believers are a continuing transformation, becoming more and more like Jesus, then we can also say, “Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ.”
We are responsible for the people we influence. That’s a sobering thought, isn’t it? We are responsible to set the best example of godly living we possibly can. We are not responsible for their behavior; they still have a free will to choose to follow our example or not. But if we do not give them the role model we should, we will be held accountable to God for our failure to be a good example.
So, the first thing I would recommend is that you make a list of the people in your life over whom you have some influence. That will help you become more intentional about being a good role model. Then add to that list the names of others that you would like to influence.
If you’re a parent, your children’s names will be at the top of the list. If you’re married, your mate’s name is likely to be on that list. Your co-workers are people over whom you have influence. If you’re a manager or business owner, the people who work for you definitely will be on that list. Your close friends are within your sphere of influence; other family members will be there. If you have any leadership roles in your church or other organizations, such as a teacher, you’ve got a list of people there for whom you are a role model.
Write those names down. You’ll be surprised how wide your influence spreads. After you’ve made a list of the people in your life whom you influence or who you would like to influence in a godly way, then you want to consider some key areas where you need to set the right example.
When Paul told the Corinthians to follow his example, he said, “Do not cause anyone to stumble. . .” (1 Corinthians 10:32). That’s a good place to start when we think of our influence as role models.
Who could you cause to stumble? In Romans 14 Paul tells us to be careful with someone whose faith is weak. Do you know any new believers? Those are people who look to us more mature Christians as role models. We could cause them to stumble by gossiping or by our lack of a servant attitude, to name just two. With new believers we have a heavy responsibility to exemplify a godly lifestyle so they have a clear model of what a Christian’s life should be.
If you’re a parent, you could cause your children to stumble. One of the most common ways we can fail our children is to live an inconsistent life. If our walk doesn’t match our talk, if we’re one way at church or with others and a different way at home, our children will see that hypocrisy, and it will have a great adverse effect on their lives.
One of the greatest blessings in my life was my parents. Yes, they took me to church regularly, but more importantly, I saw them live out their faith in our home on a daily basis. They were the same people at home as everywhere else, and their godly role modeling has had an inestimable positive effect on my life and my brothers as well. They did not cause me to stumble through a hypocritical lifestyle.
For those who go out to a job each day, there are people on that job who look at you as a role model. Maybe you have a new co-worker who is looking to you for training or help as he or she begins. You are a role model to that person. Your work habits and your work attitude will set a standard for that new employee. If you’re never on time for work, why should they be? If you bad mouth the boss, they will too. But if you are a diligent worker and you show a godly attitude toward the boss and the job, that new coworker will be more likely to conform his or her behavior to yours, since you’re the senior person on the job.
Anyone who has a position of leadership is always role modeling, whether you like it or not. I often remind managers that if you want to be a good manager, you don’t have the luxury of being in a bad mood because if you’re in a bad mood, everyone who works for you will be in a bad mood before the day is over. That’s because as a leader, you are a role model, and your attitude is very contagious.
Ask yourself this question: How do you react to stress and crises on the job? Do you go into gripe mode? Do you exhibit a bad attitude? Do you overreact? If so, you are setting that example for your co-workers, your employees, even for your management.
One way to evaluate your effectiveness as a role model on your job is to ask yourself: If everyone else in the company was like me, worked as hard as I do, was as loyal as I am, managed their time like I do, went the extra mile as much as I do, had the same attitude I have, would we have a better company? A godly role model on the job will raise the performance standards for everyone they influence.
Isn’t that an exciting prospect? Regardless of who you are or what position you have in the company, even if you’re in an entry level position, you can have a positive impact on the company’s success, the company’s morale, the company’s profitability by simply being a positive, godly role model. You will raise the bar so that others will want to jump higher and do better.
Way back in the early church the Apostle Paul understood the importance of good role modeling. He wrote:
For you yourselves know how you ought to follow our example. . . . we worked night and day, laboring and toiling so that we would not be a burden to any of you. We did this, not because we do not have the right to such help, but in order to make ourselves a model for you to follow. (2 Thessalonians 3:7-9)
Now, consider what this teaches us. Paul inconvenienced himself in order to establish a strong model for the Thessalonian church to follow. In other words, being a godly role model for those under his influence was a very high priority for Paul, something he consciously made an effort to do even though it increased his workload.
If we are to be godly role models – good leaders, we’ll have to go out of our way and inconvenience ourselves at times. It will take effort and sometimes sacrifice. You may be thinking, “Well, I think I’ll just skip it then.” But you see, we don’t have a choice about whether we’ll be a role model or not; we only have a choice about whether we’ll be a godly role model or not. Everyone is somebody’s role model.
Role modeling is both a privilege and a responsibility. It’s a privilege because it allows us to influence others in a godly direction, and that has eternal significance–it really matters. If you’re looking for something to do that is meaningful, becoming a godly role model sure fills that bill. It makes a difference that matters for eternity, and that is a great privilege.
But also consider the responsibility of being a role model. For example, you can lecture your children until you’re blue in the face about never telling a lie, but if they hear you slanting the truth, you’ve lost your credibility. On the other hand, if they observe that you read your Bible and pray on a daily basis, they’ll be much more likely to do so as well. More than anyone else in your life, your children will learn from your example far more than they will learn from your words.
So, becoming a godly role model requires a close daily walk with the Lord, a humble spirit, and lots of dependence upon his power in us. It is a responsibility, but please, don’t lose sight of the great privilege you have to be a godly role model.
Not long ago a good friend of mine changed jobs and as she began her new job, she did what she always does: She worked hard and gave her employer a good day’s work for her pay. However, the people who worked in her department were not accustomed to that kind of work ethic. Indeed, they had all developed some very bad work habits and were quite lazy.
As they observed my friend’s work ethic, some of them made comments on how she was going to make them look bad. But she quietly responded that she just had to do her work diligently because that was the right thing to do, and she kept on working hard every day. Soon she noticed that the other employees started doing their jobs better, and they developed much better work habits simply because my friend had role modeled what a good worker should do.
She wasn’t their manager; in fact, she was low man on the totem pole as the new employee. But she role modeled what she believed God would have her do as an employee and that has changed the morale and the work habits of her department. That’s an example of what it means to be a godly role model.
To give you a different kind of story, several years ago I was asked to do some training for a large company in New Jersey. The manager in charge was very intent on improving his employees’ telephone skills, and he insisted that they use a friendlier telephone greeting. But he would answer his phone in an abrupt manner using only his last name. I suggested that if he would change his telephone habits, it would have a very favorable impression on his workers, and they’d be more likely to change. He laughed and said, “Oh, Mary, I’ve been answering the phone this way for 25 years; I’m not likely to change now.”
Well, I knew my training efforts would have limited success because those workers would be more influenced by their boss’s role model than they would by my training session.
So, whether you’re a worker, a manager, a business owner, a low person on the ladder, or at the top, you have the privilege and the responsibility to be a godly role model. Don’t miss your opportunities.
Ever had a new boss who came in with unrealistic demands and expectations? That’s where our friend, Fran, finds herself these days. Since Ben Mason has become their new manager, the whole department has been demoralized.
Fran notices she is praying more now and that’s one good thing this new manager has done for her. She is determined God will help her deal with this with a good attitude and a sense of joy, not fear. Her friend, Louise, is a great help, and together they often pray for the office and each other.
After a few weeks, it becomes obvious Ben’s knowledge of the industry, the competition, and the art of selling is woefully weak. But through all these difficult days, Fran continues to pray for the ability to see Ben the way God does. When she is so exasperated she doesn’t think she can take it another minute, she sees again that Ben is consumed with fear, and he covers it up with bravado.
In a meeting with him, after reviewing a proposal for a new prospect, she says, “Ben, would you like to go with me for this presentation? I think it would be impressive for the prospect to meet the boss, and I’d be glad to have your help.”
He looks at her briefly then turns his eyes away, obviously nervous. “I. . . I, uh. . . I really don’t think I have time, Fran,” he says, and then looks at her almost like a child, “but thanks for asking me.”
“Is there anything else I can do for you, Ben?” Fran asks, trying to give him some word of encouragement. Somehow, he senses her genuine care, and he responds quietly, “Well, if you can tell me how to get these numbers up, that would help. Instead of improving, we’ve actually done worse since I got here. I don’t know what’s happening.”
“Ben,” Fran says, “adjusting to a new place is always a challenge. Don’t be discouraged about the numbers. They’ll improve, I’m sure.”
And before Fran realizes it, Ben is earnestly soliciting her advice. She spends the better part of an hour giving him some help, trying to do so without hurting his pride. She suggests a different approach to the account reps and other motivational things he might do. Finally, he says, “I think you could do this job better than me,” and looks at her with a very humble smile.
“Ben, I know you want to succeed, but you need all of us on your team,” Fran says. “I just want you to know I’m on your team. I’ve been praying for you. And I believe you can succeed here.”
“Praying for me?” Ben is astonished.
“Well, yes,” Fran says, “I believe in prayer, and I talk to the Lord about everything in my life. It really makes a difference.”
She assures Ben she is available to help anytime. After that she and others detect some improvement in Ben’s approach and things seem to get a little better.
Well, if you’re facing a difficult manager, remember Fran’s experience. It may encourage you.
Today is the day our friend Fran has her first one-on-one meeting with her new manager, Ben Mason. So, Fran is taking her lunch hour to pray for her 2pm meeting. She goes to her car, where she can have some privacy, and begins to pray.
“Lord, I know my life is in your hands and Ben does not have control over me; you do. Help me to see Ben the way you see him. Remind me that you love him as much as you love me. And guard my words carefully, Lord.”
Thinking of her own fears, the Lord seems to impress her with this thought: Ben is afraid, too. “Of course,” Fran says to herself, “he’s trying to cover up his fear with this tough attitude.” It’s as though a veil has been lifted from her eyes, and she can see fear written all over Ben.
As she arrives at his office, Ben asks her to be seated and then says, “I see that you have been a sales leader in the office several times, Fran. I guess you think you’re pretty good,” and he looks at her with a sarcastic grin.
“I enjoy the job, Ben, and hopefully I’ve gotten better at it as the years have gone by,” Fran replies, trying to avoid any defensiveness.
“Well, if you ask me, your numbers are pretty anemic for a sales leader. You ought to be doing twice this much business if you’re that good. What’s the matter? Don’t you like going after new business?” Ben asks with an accusatory tone.
What does she say? Another silent emergency prayer goes up, and she finds some words. “Well, obviously, Ben, finding new business is the hardest part of the job. I would imagine that you must have been very good at new business, and I am looking forward to learning from you so I can do it better. I hope you’ll share your secrets.”
“It’s hard work, Fran,” Ben says, “and I expect a lot more from you than what you’ve done in the past.”
“If you will tell me exactly what you expect, I will certainly do my best to meet your expectations, Ben,” Fran manages to reply.
“Here’s what I expect,” Ben says, and he tells her how much revenue he expects from her in the next six months. The number is almost double her current quota, and Fran has to catch her breath. Both anger and fear begin to grip her heart and mind.
Then she remembers what God showed her about Ben—he is frightened. And she says, “Well, to tell you the truth, Ben, this number is frightening. If you were trying to put fear into me, I guess you have succeeded,” and she looks at him with a faint smile.
“Well, maybe this whole place needs a dose of fear. That’s the new quota, and I expect you to meet it,” Ben says. He then dismisses her, and that is the end of their first meeting.
Today, Fran met the new manager of her department—Ben Mason—and she’s not happy about him. This evening, she calls her friend Louise to commiserate about Ben, but instead Louise refuses to get into a gossip session. Fran ended the conversation rather abruptly, but her face is glowing red, both from anger and from shame. She is angry with Louise for confronting her so forcefully, and ashamed of how she behaved.
Fran steams around the house for half an hour with a fierce battle inside her. Finally, she sits down with her Bible and begins to pray. But few words come out before the tears start. “Lord, I’m so sorry. How could I behave so badly? How could I?” Fran cries out to the Lord. She is so disappointed in herself. She knows better than to gossip. She knows how wrong it is to have such a rotten attitude. She knows to take her concerns to the Lord and not complain to people. She knows all that, and yet she has done just the opposite.
Opening her Bible to Romans 7, she reads beginning in verse 21:
So, I find this law at work: Although I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in God’s law; but I see another law at work in me, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within me. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death? Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord (Romans 7:21-25)!
“Wretched, Lord,” Fran prays, “that’s exactly the way I feel. I want to do your will, yet so easily, so quickly, I go back to my own self-centered way of responding. Please forgive me.” After a time of prayer and assurance that the Lord has indeed forgiven her, Fran thinks about what her next steps should be. “First, I have some apologies to make. Then I have to change my attitude toward Ben. He is my manager, and no one is in my life by accident.”
She turns to Romans 13 and reads again the passage about those in authority:
Let everyone be subject to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God. Consequently, whoever rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves (Romans 13:1-2).
She prays for God to help her to respect Ben and his authority over her.
Before going to bed, she phones Louise back with a sincere apology, and the two of them covenant again to hold each other accountable. The next day at work Fran finds a moment alone with George to apologize for her participation in the bad words about Ben.
But now the challenge begins: She must deal directly with Ben Mason, her new boss.
Our friend Fran begins this workweek with a new boss. Marilyn has been promoted and now, Ben Mason joins the department from the Boston office.
At 9am, a meeting of the department is convened, and Ben Mason is introduced. He begins his opening remarks, “Well, I’m glad to be here and look forward to a very successful year. I’ve been looking at your numbers and we’ve got some work to do, don’t we? Seems to me we haven’t secured enough new clients. Maybe some of us are just too contented to rock along the way things are. Well, you’ll see some changes in the next few days because I think it’s time for a shakeup. We want to be the number one sales office in the company, and I intend to make it happen this year.”
A silence falls over the department like a wet blanket. “Whoa,” Fran thinks, “what an opening shot he has fired.” She goes back to her office with some fear and trepidation. Before she has time to sit down, George walks in. He’s been an account manager for over ten years, and he really knows his business. “Fran, can you believe that guy? What a stupid thing to say on your first day in a new office. He must be connected with somebody somewhere to get this job. Man, life is going to be difficult for us.”
Fran shakes her head. “I know, George,” she says, “I was shocked at what he said. He looks like a child; how old can he be? And how much experience can he have? You’re right—we’re in for some tough days.”
They commiserate together a few minutes longer, and George leaves. Fran feels a cloud of discouragement descending upon her. As she goes home later, she lets her mind run wild with imaginations of how awful it is going to be to work for such a young arrogant man. She does the minimum that needs to be done to get the kids fed, do their homework, and get them into bed by 9pm. Then she calls her friend Louise, who works with her and is also a believer. “Louise, what did you think about Ben Mason? Pretty pitiful, right?”
Louise is quiet. Fran continues. “Did you ever hear such an awful opening message? I mean, it has to break all the rules of being a good manager. Where did they dig this guy up anyway?”
Louise remains quiet. “Louise, are you there?” Fran asks.
“Yes, Fran, but I just don’t think we should be talking about him. . .”
Fran feels the sting of her brief remark and knows she is right. But she’s not there yet. “Well, I’m just telling you how I feel, Louise. I mean, you have to tell someone, don’t you?”
“Yeah, we do need to tell someone, I agree,” Louise says very quietly, “but I don’t think we should be gossiping.”
“Gossiping?” Fran becomes defensive. “I don’t think this is gossip. I’m just reporting on the facts. Oh well, I know you’re busy; don’t want to keep you, Louise. See you in the morning.” And with that abrupt ending, she hangs up the phone.
Have you ever reported to someone you felt was incompetent and arrogant? In our story of Fran and Jesus on the Job, Fran encounters a new boss who taxes her patience to the limits. Since her husband’s untimely death, Fran has been blessed, really, with a good job and a good boss. Under Marilyn’s guidance and with her help, Fran has grown considerably in this position, and she really enjoys working for her. Even more importantly, Fran actually led her to saving faith in Jesus Christ. All in all, Fran is more than pleased with her current situation at work.
Today as she busily writes a proposal for a new client, Marilyn comes into her office and sits down. “Uh oh,” Fran says half teasing, “When you come in and sit down, I know we’re in for something serious. What’s up, Marilyn?”
Marilyn smiles. “Well, I have good news and good news. Which do you want first?”
“Oh, please, the good news first,” Fran laughs.
“The good news is I’ve just been selected as Vice President of Marketing for the entire division,” Marilyn reports, with obvious great pleasure.
“No kidding?!” Fran exclaims. “Marilyn, that is awesome. Congratulations!”
“Well, I’m a bit overwhelmed,” Marilyn says, “but I am excited about the opportunity.”
“You deserve it, Marilyn,” Fran says, “and I couldn’t be happier for you. But wait a minute,” she pauses. “Does this mean you’ll be moving?”
“Well, that’s the other good news, Fran. You won’t have to put up with me as a boss any longer. You’ll have a new boss starting next Monday. They’re promoting a guy from the Boston office. His name is Ben Mason. I don’t know him personally, but evidently, he’s done well there in sales, and so they’re bringing him here as a manager.”
Fran plops back down in her chair. “Sorry, Marilyn, but that is not good news. You’re the best, and you’ve been such a great help to me. What will we do without you?”
As Fran learns more about this Ben Mason, she realizes they have chosen someone with little experience. She asks Marilyn, “Why didn’t they choose someone right within our office. There are several here who’ve got more experience than that.”
“My guess is that this is a young guy on his way up, and they may have him on a fast track. I admit it’s a little unusual but wait and see. He must be good, or they wouldn’t promote him this quickly,” Marilyn tries to reassure Fran.
A big farewell party is quickly planned for Marilyn, and Fran sheds some tears as she began to realize she was losing not only a good manager but also a good friend. She has found a good church in Boston to recommend to Marilyn and they promise to stay in close touch. But what about this Ben Mason person? What kind of boss is he going to be?
As disciples of Jesus Christ, he is our role model for every situation in our lives. The more you learn about Jesus, the more you will be amazed to see how he dealt with people and how he handled difficult situations. I encourage you to read a chapter in one of the Gospels every day. Just start in Matthew, go through John, and then start over again. I promise you’ll learn something new about Jesus every time you read the Gospels.
One good way to read the Gospels is to put yourself in the picture; imagine that you are there, one of the disciples, or maybe you’re hearing Jesus for the first time. It will give you new insights into this God-man—a man like no other who ever lived. Yet, he was a man who was touched with the feelings of our infirmities because he chose to take on humanity and spend thirty-three years on this earth.
Today we want to see how Jesus dealt with people who were misfits, people who were different. We can learn a lot from him, because for sure we have those kinds of people in our worlds, too.
Who are the people where you work or where you live that most people have nothing to do with? In most situations, there are people who are not part of the in-group. You know, they look different or dress oddly. They talk a little strangely; maybe they don’t smell as good as they should. Or they’re not as educated as others. Maybe they’re just not important people. They are often avoided or left out. They are people on the margins.
Make time for people on the margins.
Jesus always had time for people that others ignored or rejected. He was continually thrown into contact with social outcasts, from lepers to beggars to sinners to demon-possessed people. In fact, he invited those kinds of encounters.
And the religious leaders of his day never could figure him out. They were careful not to associate with these undesirables. How could this man intentionally surround himself with those who were unlovely, unattractive, unappealing? It didn’t make sense to them.
Yet Jesus, by associating with those rejected by others, was able to heal them, help them, make them feel special, and give them hope. This is a good lesson for us to learn from our Master as we think about how we treat people. We should go out of our way to associate with those who are on the outside looking in.
Can you think of someone right now who would fit that description? They may be a coworker or a member of your church or a participant in your Bible study or a neighbor. Why don’t you write that person’s name down, purpose in your heart to pray for that person, and then find ways to associate with him or her, to reach out and bring that person within your circle of friends. You may be amazed at what God wants to do for that person through you and what it will do for you to learn this important people skill.
I think of a woman I know who would probably fit that “misfit” description. At first meeting you would probably think she was not as bright as others, or certainly was socially backward. But I’ve known her for years and discovered that she is very smart. She held a job for thirty years before retiring, and she has taught herself to use a computer, she takes classes at our church and other classes offered at libraries and such. She is truly delightful, but many would describe her as a social misfit.
It’s always good to remind ourselves that God loves us all the same. He is no respecter of people, and each of us is of equal importance to him. When we look at people through his eyes, we’ll see that we all are on the same level.
Break down walls that exist.
Have you ever met someone or dealt with someone who just immediately put-up walls and barriers between you and them? Perhaps they were cold, defensive, withdrawn, or angry. But for whatever reason, the walls were up, and they weren’t going to let anyone bring them down.
Jesus was masterful at breaking down walls, and I think the best example is how he dealt with the woman at the well, the Samaritan woman he just “happened to meet” on his journey. Let’s analyze how Jesus dealt with the woman at the well:
John 4:4-7
Now Jesus had to go through Samaria. So he came to a town in Samaria called Sychar, near the plot of ground Jacob had given to his son Joseph. Jacob’s well was there, and Jesus, tired as he was from the journey, sat down by the well. It was about noontime.
When a Samaritan woman came to draw water, Jesus said to her, “Will you give me a drink?”
He asked her for something. This woman was a stranger; she would naturally be skeptical of him because he was a man and he was Jewish. So, to break down the barriers between them, Jesus begins with a request.
How do you think she would have responded if he had said: “I’m very thirsty and I need some water. Give me some water.” It’s always better to ask than tell, even if you have the power to tell. People respond better to requests than demands.
The Samaritan woman said to him: You are a Jew and I am a Samaritan woman. How can you ask me for a drink?” (For Jews do not associate with Samaritans.) Jesus answered her, “If you knew the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, you would have asked him and he would have given you living water (John 4:9-10).
Jesus responded with an answer that created curiosity on her part. He wanted to start a conversation and get her engaged. So, he talked about something with which she was very familiar—water—and he caused her to ask him questions.
How do you think she would have responded if he had said: “Yes, I am a Jew, and you are a Samaritan. Obviously, you know that the Jews are the true people of God. Samaritans are half-breeds. And you should understand that your theology is all mixed up about the afterlife and where you should worship. I would like to tell you the truth. By the way, I am the Messiah of God, the promised one.” No doubt she would have had a totally different response. But listen to how she responded to him:
“Sir,” the woman said, “you have nothing to draw with and the well is deep. Where can you get this living water? Are you greater than our father Jacob, who gave us the well and drank from it himself, as did also his sons and his flocks and herds?”
Jesus answered, “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.” (John 4:11-14).
Notice that Jesus did not take her bait. At this point she is still very suspicious of him and ready to fight. But Jesus avoids her argumentative question and keeps talking about this living water.
Suppose he had said: “Yes, indeed I am greater than Jacob. As I told you, I am the Messiah. Can’t you understand me? Before Jacob was, I am.” That was the truth, but she wasn’t ready for the truth yet, and Jesus knew how to respond to her to keep her engaged and asking questions.
The woman said to him, “Sir, give me this water so that I won’t get thirsty and have to keep coming here to draw water.” He told her, “Go, call your husband and come back.”
“I have no husband,” she replied. Jesus said to her, “You are right when you say you have no husband. The fact is, you have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband. What you have just said is quite true.” (John 4:15-18).
It’s time for getting things out in the open and addressing her deep-seated problems. Up to this point she has side-stepped her real heart issue, but Jesus has gently led her along to a point where the problem comes out from her own mouth.
Suppose he had said: “Listen, lady, you’ve got a lot of problems in your life. You’ve been married five times and that guy you’re living with now is not your husband. You’re an immoral woman and you need to get your life cleaned up.” That kind of confrontation would have chased her away, but instead in a most gentle way, he leads her to speak the truth.
“Sir,” the woman said, “I can see that you are a prophet. Our fathers worshiped on this mountain, but you Jews claim that the place where we must worship is in Jerusalem.”
Jesus declared, “Believe me, woman, a time is coming when you will worship the Father neither on this mountain nor in Jerusalem. You Samaritans worship what you do not know; we worship what we do know, for salvation is from the Jews. Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks. God is spirit and his worshipers must worship in spirit and in truth.”
The woman said, “I know that Messiah is coming. When he comes he will explain everything to us.” Then Jesus declared, “I who speak to you am he.” (John 4:19-26).
The woman is uncomfortable, so she tries to change the subject and talk about a theological point of difference. Jesus confronts her with the truth about worship and salvation, and she once again tries to side-step: “When the Messiah comes, he’ll straighten all this out,” she says. And then for the first recorded time, Jesus reveals that he is the Messiah.
Notice that Jesus is direct when he needs to be. Truth should never be compromised for relationships. Yet when he speaks the truth, he does it for her good, because truth will set her free, not to prove his point or lord it over her that her theology is incorrect.
Look at the principles we can learn from Jesus in dealing with people from his encounter with this woman:
- Asking is better than telling. People like to be asked. It’s a good way to open a conversation and start building a relationship.
- It’s always good to find mutual ground to start a conversation. Talk about something you have in common.
- Always avoid arguments. Differences of opinion or ideas can certainly be discussed, but arguments do not improve communication. They just create more rigid positions, which make it more difficult for people to see the truth.
- Don’t try to impress people with who you are or what you’ve done. Let them discover that for themselves.
- When it’s necessary to confront, do so as gently as possible. If you can help someone uncover their own problem, it’s better than telling them what you see that is wrong with them.
I encourage you to learn from Jesus; get to know him better and better through Scripture. He is the perfect communicator, and when we communicate more and more like Jesus, we are able to connect with people in more meaningful ways.
Watch out for that send button! That is my word of caution as I conclude my thoughts on effective electronic communication. That send button on your computer makes it easy to get a message off right away, but it also can become your Achilles heel if it is used carelessly.
Remember everything you send through email is out there somewhere in cyberspace forever and ever! You may intend it to be for one person’s eyes only, but it can very easily be distributed or read by people who were never supposed to read it. Whatever you say in cyberspace cannot be taken back. You lose control of your message once you hit send. Those emails can come back to harm you, to destroy friendships, even to ruin careers.
Not long ago I wrote an email about a sensitive situation and was just about to send it when I realized there was no way I wanted that email in cyberspace. And then, also not long ago, I sent an email to the wrong person. I chose the correct first name, but failed to see that there was more than one person in my address book with that first name. I sent it to the wrong person. Thankfully it wasn’t of a sensitive nature so there was no harm done, but I just realized again how easy it is to send an email to the wrong person.
A good rule of thumb is to read over every word in your email before you send it. Check the name or names and make sure they are correct. And then ask yourself, is there anything in this email that should not be in writing? If in doubt, don’t! Pick up the phone or wait until you see that person to send that message. It’s not as fast, but it could save you lots of trouble in the future.
Proverbs 21:23 says, those who guard their mouths and their tongues keep themselves from calamity. Guarding your words—even those electronic words—can truly help you avoid calamity.
What is the most annoying thing about electronic communication to you? Don’t you wish that in order to use emails, everyone had to agree to certain rules of etiquette? No doubt you get lots of junk emails and long emails and annoying emails regularly. The question is, are you careful to avoid those email mistakes yourself?
For example, don’t be the person who sends out a constant stream of informational emails to people who have not requested them or don’t need them. For example, forwarding articles or other emails that have a political bent to them is truly not smart professionally. And getting a constant stream of jokes or funny stories can become annoying. Even inspirational emails can be overdone.
I confess these streams of emails are the ones I generally don’t read. I look at the subject, see who it’s from, and determine if it’s worth my time to read a long email. However, people I know and trust occasionally send me very worthwhile things to read, and because it is infrequent, I know they have thoughtfully sent something I will want to read, so I do. It’s good to remember anything can be overdone. Again, less is more.
If you have a particularly complex communication or if there is significant emotional content to a message you need to send, determine if sending it by email is the best way to go. For example, if you need to apologize, it may be best to do that by phone or in person. Or when you’re delivering a message you know they don’t want to hear, such as denying a request of some sort, that is usually done best in a personal communication. Don’t use email communication to avoid uncomfortable messages or to cover up a mistake. In the long run, it will create more problems for you.
I’m examining email etiquette! Have you found emailing to be a blessing or a curse? It has certainly improved our ability to communicate quickly and easily, but it can become our master. We can truly become addicted and in bondage to this way of communicating. It’s a tool we need to use, for sure, but we need to use it wisely and correctly.A few more rules of etiquette for emails, in addition to the ones I shared with you yesterday: Be informal but not sloppy. Your email communication represents you and your organization, so it’s just as important to use correct spelling, grammar and punctuation as it would be for a printed communication. When you have an email for a group of people, consider how much more effective it might be if the email were individually sent to each person. Now, it’s certainly not necessary to do this with every group email, but for important communications you definitely want to be read, an email addressed to me personally, for example, will carry more weight than one addressed to me and several others. Using all capital letters looks as if you’re shouting, so only use it when you want to shout! Maybe there are times to shout for joy and that can be effective, but most of the time it has a negative effect. Instead, use a font color to highlight things. Generally, the fewer words you use, the more effectively you will communicate. Most of us use far more words than are necessary to get our messages across, and people just start to tune us out. A good suggestion is to edit every email before you send it and eliminate unnecessary words. Less is definitely more when it comes to emails.The Apostle Paul wrote so whatever you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God (1 Corinthians 10:31). Well, as a Christ-follower that means your communication skills—which are things you do—should be done for God’s glory. I send emails every day; most of you do as well. I want even the emails I send to bring honor, not dishonor, to my Lord.
How is your email etiquette? Recently a good friend was telling me the woes she is having with email communication. She is a computer programmer, and in order to help her coworkers, she sends emails with instructions on how to avoid problems, use the system better, etc. Her motivation is totally right; she wants to help. But some of her coworkers interpret her emails as being critical. What is she doing wrong?
Proverbs 16:21 says: The wise in heart are called discerning, and gracious words promote instruction. Another translation says sweetness of speech increases persuasiveness. This principle holds true for emails as much as it does for the spoken word. Your choice of words always makes a difference. And remember asking is usually better than telling.
A good way to judge how your words will be perceived is to read your email out loud to yourself before you send it and see how the words sound when they are spoken. That will often give you a clue as to the tone of your message and how it could be perceived by the person receiving it.
Some email dos and don’ts:
- Be careful with your use of emotional symbols—emojis. You may find it clever or funny, but the recipient may not. Save those for casual messages between friends.
- Remember not everyone is as computer savvy as you are, and they may not understand those online abbreviations that have become popular. So, be careful using those.
- Start your business emails with a salutation. If you’re writing to three people or less, use their names: Hello, Tom, Jane and Linda. If you’re writing to more than three, you can use a common greeting, something as simple as “Hello.” But starting an email with no salutation can be perceived as harsh. If you’re involved in a long email going back and forth, you can eliminate the salutation after the first reply, but when in doubt, it never hurts to use a greeting.
This is one area where I have to watch myself, because I just want to get to the meat of the message and skip the “niceties,” thinking they’re not necessary. But it truly can make a difference in the minds of others, so take the time to add that salutation.
Did you know email messaging now exceeds telephone traffic and is the dominant form of business communication? Businesses report many of their employees spend three to four hours a day on email. And most of us would say, “What did we ever do without email?”
However, along with this change in the way we communicate has come a new set of challenges. Communicating electronically is a very different medium, and if you are going to be effective in your job, you will need to learn how to use this tool and not abuse it. And that includes not only email, but Facebook, Twitter or X, and all the others which seem to pop up daily.
I thought it might be helpful to examine ways to improve our electronic communication skills. The way we communicate creates impressions and perceptions of us as people. And as Christ-followers, we not only represent ourselves, but more importantly, we are ambassadors for Jesus Christ. Paul wrote to the Corinthians, for we are taking pains to do what is right, not only in the eyes of the Lord but also in the eyes of men (2 Corinthians 8:21). I think it behooves us to take pains to improve our communication skills.
Let me begin by saying that as convenient as electronic communication is, it cannot replace the power of personal interaction. There are many times when face-to-face and voice-to-voice communication is absolutely the better way to go. No doubt we’ve lost a lot of personal touch because we use electronic means too often and too much. It’s much more difficult to communicate care and compassion by email than it is in person.
It’s true we may communicate more often because we have these convenient ways to do it, but it’s also true that the impersonal nature of electronic communication can cause us to be careless in how we say things. It can make us sound cold and harsh. We must learn to put ourselves in the shoes of the person reading our emails and find ways to communicate courtesy and thoughtfulness electronically.
If you are in the business world, no doubt you’re surrounded by all types of people, and as a disciple of Jesus Christ, your challenge is to deal with all those people like Jesus would. In fact, that’s true whether you’re in the business world or not! The Christian life is literally, Christ in you, the hope of glory (Colossians 1:27). Paul said, For to me, to live is Christ. . . (Philippians 1:21). And again, I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me (Galatians 2:20).
We are the living word of God that people read every day. And if God has chosen to place you in what we call “secular” jobs, among those who yet have no understanding of God’s love and grace, you are his ambassador. But for true Christians, nothing in our lives is secular. We are all called to be ambassadors for Jesus Christ, whether, as a pastor in a church, or driving a truck, or nursing in a hospital, or selling computers, or raising our children—or whatever! It is a big responsibility we carry as ambassadors for Jesus Christ, but the good news is that we have been given the Holy Spirit to dwell in us. It is through his power that we are enabled to take Jesus to work, as it were.
The way we relate to others is through communication—the words we speak, the way we speak to them, our timing, our attitude, our motivation. All of these contribute to the way others perceive us and whether they see Christ in us.
I want to look at some specific examples of how Jesus communicated with different people in different situations, because we can learn from the Master how we can best communicate with the broken world around us.
Communicating with People Who Disappoint Us
Has someone in your life disappointed you greatly? Life is full of those kinds of disappointments. Guess what—you’ve probably disappointed some people, too. When someone disappoints us, if we don’t know how to respond, we can do further damage to that relationship. Well, what can we learn from Jesus in dealing with people who disappoint us?
Did you ever think about how his closest friends and associates failed Jesus? Judas betrayed him; Peter denied him; all the disciples abandoned him in the Garden of Gethsemane, shortly after they had all declared they would even die for him. But at the first sign of trouble, they were gone.
Those twelve men were disappointing failures as disciples, were they not? They were slow to learn. They had their priorities all confused. They displayed very selfish motives for following Jesus and being his disciple. Over and over Jesus indicated his frustration with their lack of faith and trust in him.
Yet, he never threw them off the team. He allowed them to fail; he permitted them to make mistakes; he suffered through their ignorance and arrogance, until finally they became the men he intended them to be—with the exception of Judas.
So, here’s a principle we learn from Jesus when people have failed us or disappointed us or failed to live up to what we expected from them:
Give people time to fail and learn.
This is a people skill we all need to learn from Jesus and learn well. People must have time to learn and grow. Failure is one of the best teaching methods ever invented. Time is also a good teacher. So, in dealing with people, remember that disappointments come with the territory.
Been disappointed in your child lately? Remember what you were like at his or her age. That always does it for me, because I can clearly remember the dumb things I did in my early years, and my daughter is way ahead of where I was. Give your child time to grow. Teach and coach and role model for your children, but remember, they’re going to disappoint you as they grow and learn.
Got an employee who disappoints you sometimes? Maybe that person hasn’t yet polished their verbal skills and they say the wrong words at times. Or maybe their work habits are lacking a bit. Be patient with them. If that person is teachable, he or she could become one of your most valued employees.
Another great people skill principle from our Master: Allow people to fail and disappoint and make mistakes, because in the process they learn and grow.
Inspire people to greatness.
Would you like to help someone be more than they ever thought they could be? Jesus was an expert at inspiring people to greatness.
Think about his famous disciple, Peter. When he first met Jesus, he was called Simon. But we read in John 1 that Jesus looked at him and said, ‘You are Simon son of John. You will be called Cephas’ (which, when translated, is Peter) (John 1:42).
Cephas and Peter both mean rock. Jesus called him rock. I wonder how Peter felt when Jesus changed his name. I’m quite certain he had some understanding of the meaning of this name change. Jesus was telling him, in effect, “Peter, I want you on my team. You’re going to be my rock. I believe in you, Peter, and you can be greater than you’ve ever imagined.”
This humble, uneducated fisherman did indeed become great in the Kingdom of God. It didn’t happen overnight, you will recall. Peter stumbled along the way many times. But Jesus had given him a new name and called him what he would become. Jesus demonstrated faith in Peter and despite his failures, Peter became the rock Jesus called him. After the resurrection of Jesus and after being filled with the Holy Spirit, Peter was courageous and strong, and was used mightily of God in establishing the early church.
So, here’s another principle we learn from Jesus. If you want to help someone be all they can be, call them what they can become. You probably won’t be able to change their name, but you can say things like, “I believe you could learn to make a very effective presentation. You are good in front of a group.” Or, “You know, you’re good at numbers and statistics. I think you could be great in our research department.” Or to your child, “Honey, you do so well in English. I can see you as a great writer.” Or to your mate, “You have such good insight into people; I bet you’d be a great counselor.”
I think of a good friend of mine who has been by my side in ministry for many years. When we first met, she was dealing with a stuttering problem. I really didn’t realize it at the time, but what I saw in her was a unique ability to capture and hold the attention of a group. In spite of that stutter, she was good on her feet. So, I kept giving her opportunities to make presentations and take part in dramas, and she began to blossom. Now, many years later, she loves to do things like that, and that stuttering issue is way behind her!
Simply expressing confidence in a person can give new hope, a new image of themselves, and it could make a major difference in what they are able to achieve and do. So, call some people some names today like Jesus did for Peter. Call them what they can become, and it will inspire them to go for it.
Be straight-forward with people in confrontational situations.
Do you have difficulty confronting people? My hand is up, I can tell you that. Yet, in dealing with people, there are times we must confront. This is one of the most sensitive communication challenges you will face, because you have to speak the truth. Sometimes the truth hurts, but it can’t be avoided. How can you learn to confront appropriately?
Well, we turn to Jesus to see how he confronted, and if you’ve read the gospels at all, you know he confronted rather bluntly at times. Read Matthew 23 and you’ll see some examples of how directly Jesus confronted some people. He confronted the religious leaders for their hypocrisy, calling them blind guides and hypocrites. No mincing words for Jesus in some of those confrontations. But notice that he said these things to their faces, never behind their backs, and he did so because he wanted to shock them into seeing their true condition.
He knew this was no time to mince words or worry about hurting their feelings. This was a life and death issue, and they needed to know the truth that would set them free. He also knew the harm they were inflicting on their followers, and he took that very seriously.
One thing we learn from Jesus when it comes to confronting people, is that there are times when we must be straight-forward, times when we must boldly confront others for their good. This is especially true if you’re in a management position. We all fear these kind of straight-forward confrontations because it is temporarily very uncomfortable. And rarely do people accept these words well initially. Yet it may be exactly what is needed for long-term change, which in the end is for their good more than anyone else’s.
Always confront under control.
Jesus never confronted people out of control. He may have been angry because of their actions or words, but when he brought them face to face with the truth, as painful as that was, he did so out of real concern for them as well as for those they would influence. You know, sometimes we have to confront people because of the effect they have on others.
In a recent situation I recognized harm that was being done to a group of people because of one person’s behavior. Had that behavior affected only me, perhaps there would have been no need for confrontation. But when I realized the harmful effect on others, I knew it was my job, as the one in authority in that situation, to confront this person. I can tell you; it ruined my day. I was uncomfortable. But I knew it was a necessary thing to do.
You may not think of confrontation as a people skill, but it definitely is. And Jesus can help you do it effectively if you will pray about it, study his method of confrontation, and grit your teeth to do what needs to be done. Of course, our motives must be scrutinized before we confront them.
There is much to learn from our Master. For example, in part two we’ll talk about how Jesus dealt with people who were on the margins—not a good fit in the society, and we’ll see how he broke down walls of resistance when he dealt with the woman at the well.
Presented by Lauren Stibgen
She extends her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy (Proverbs 31:20).
We find a very clear instruction in Proverbs 31:20. Extending leadership influence beyond the office and being charitable with your time, treasure, and talent to those in need helps you provide a good example to your team of how Jesus loved others.
I have the pleasure of working with a very charitable organization that allows us to match our donations for an approved charity. This not only allows me to amplify my giving locally, but it allows my team to extend themselves as well. The amount isn’t as important as the awareness the giving brings to common areas of interest and the ways all of us care for our community.
In addition to the charitable match, we also allow for two service days annually. We give our team members a day away to serve others in their community. What has been even better is that the team has also opted to support a charity together and serve as a team.
These are examples of both time and treasure, but how are you giving of your talent? 1 Peter 4:10 says as each one has received a gift, use it to serve one another. While there are many biblical gifts we could discuss, I would ask you think of something you are good at that could benefit someone in need. Are you a good cook? Maybe someone could use a home cooked meal. Do you enjoy connecting with people? Perhaps you could start a bible study or prayer meeting locally. Perhaps you are handy. Maybe you could lend a hand to someone who has a home that needs repair. Do you have executive skills like strategy and planning, finance, marketing, or technology? Maybe it is time you join a volunteer board for a non-profit that serves your community or a cause that is important to you.
I see women leading with open hearts every day. From serving in children’s ministries, to helping immigrants new to this country, working to solve human trafficking to foster care, and even literacy, these women take their talents to the next level. It isn’t about the financial donations they give, but about the extension of their talent with God’s love in their community and beyond.
Being a leader, you are also called to be charitable. How can you extend your arm to someone today?
Presented by Lauren Stibgen
Wouldn’t it be terrific to laugh at the days to come? While this verse from Proverbs 31 seems flippant at face value, at its core is a woman who seeks her wisdom from God and fears him first.
Being God fearing and wise are both attributes of leadership that help us further show love and faith at work. If we think of Colossians 3:23 where we are implored to work as to the Lord and not man, abiding in God’s Word for us helps us develop a healthy fear and reverence naturally.
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised (Proverbs 31:30).
We talked about our physical presence and how we can clothe ourselves with strength and dignity, but the Word here is clear. We shouldn’t solely rely on this. What does fear of the Lord look like?
Naturally, if we fear God we seek to behave in a manner that is pleasing to him. This could show up in leadership as honesty, being giving of your time, or even through excellence in the work you produce. It can also show up in how you resolve conflicts with others or in how you listen well to your team.
This reliance on God is not arrogant, especially since we know we cannot perfectly predict or control our future. God can.
Proverbs 1:7 tells us, the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. The fruit of our Proverbs 31 woman’s fear is seen in verse 26.
She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue (Proverbs 31:26).
Being a leader, you are in a position to provide instruction. Maybe this is as simple as on the job, technical training or providing deeper feedback to someone about specific development they need to progress to the next level of their career. In either instance we are called to be faithful. Being faithful with our words and being consistent in how we show up are all good fruits that help us love our teams well.
Presented by Lauren Stibgen
She is clothed with strength and dignity; and can laugh at the days to come (Proverbs 31:25).
As a leader, being clothed can take on aspects of both physical presence and personality presence.
Consider the two defining words: strength and dignity.
How do you show strength in both your physical presence and in your personality as a leader? First let’s think of our physical strength. You have heard the phrase you can’t pour from an empty cup! As a leader, taking care of your physical strength through minding your health is important. Are you getting enough sleep to endure through your day? Are you able to physically move your body and nourish yourself with healthy foods? All these daily habits of health will increase your physical strength.
Now, what about showing strength in personality? Balancing strength with humility as a Christian is critical to showing love to others. Having a strong personality can take on negative connotations, but what if you think about leading with strength? One way you might show strength with a humble approach is by highlighting the work your subordinates complete. Perhaps you speak up during a meeting with an opinion that is contrary to the remainder of your leadership team in a respectful manner, or maybe you propose a new way to implement faith employee resource groups in your workplace.
Now we shift to dignity in both your physical presence and in your personality as a leader.
Dignity is defined as the state or quality of being worthy of honor and respect.
I know this may sound silly but how you physically show up matters. Are you dressed professionally? This can take many forms depending on your environment, but dressing your best and being clothed in a dignified way matters. My mom always told me to dress for the job I want, not the one I have!
What about having a dignified personality? Part of being worthy of honor and respect is showing honor and respect. Reflecting dignity to others is another way to show Christ’s love to others at work.
Dignity is a basic human need; it’s our sense of self-worth, respect, and esteem. Preserving dignity in another person means respecting their whole self and caregiving in a way that respects their preferences and individuality.
Jesus showed dignity to others throughout the scriptures. From tax collectors to prostitutes, he should serve as our best example of how to approach each person where she is at. You may be the only example of Christ at work, and showing others dignity is key.
Now for the final piece of this verse that indicates she can laugh at the days to come. The Proverbs 31 woman doesn’t fear the future because she leans on the Lord for wisdom.
Presented by Lauren Stibgen
How do you start your day? And how do you solve problems that arise? Part of being a good leader is how you prepare and resource yourself. Considering Proverbs 31, what do we learn about being prepared?
Two verses from Proverbs 31 stand out to me.
She gets up while it is still night; she provides food for her family and portions for her female servants (Proverbs 31:15).
Sometimes the days seem long, and I know not everyone will wake up early to start their day. However, being a prepared leader will not only help you but will show love and respect also. Planning and being prepared can impact the elusive work/life balance so many people are seeking. As a leader, taking a few minutes in the morning to plan for your day is essential.
Thinking more about providing food for her family and portions for her female servants, we can consider how those who work for us are in our care, just like our family. Whether it is a well-planned meeting or even planning to reach out to team members for a quick check in, a plan helps in their feeding.
The next verse in Proverbs 31 also helps us consider our preparedness.
When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet (Proverbs 31:21).
How is your team clothed? Let’s think of some examples of what this looks like at work. The pandemic gave us a look at how clothed teams were in their ability to work from anywhere. Some companies shined with their technology and others struggled to get this up and running.
As a leader, how are you clothing your team to be ready if you take time away on vacation? Are work plans communicated with clarity, and are plans in place for someone to cover?
What if one of your key team members suddenly leaves the organization? How is the team clothed to have access to important information like emails or files that will help with workflow?
Taking special care in clothing someone to be prepared for a promotion is another consideration as you lead. Leaders who can help promote or grow other leaders are truly helping prepare their organizations, their subordinates, and themselves for what is next!
Maybe you are listening to these examples and thinking you have a little fear for your work household! Wake up early and start making a list of how you can best prepare to clothe your team today and for future growth!
Presented by Lauren Stibgen
Many of us have read about the Proverbs 31 woman. Proverbs 31 verses 10-31 describe a woman who is to be praised for her godly character. In today’s reality, she embodies what many of us as Christian working women are: wives, mothers, and business leaders! Looking at this example in Proverbs 31, we consider some of the attributes that can impact our leadership.
A wife of noble character, who can find? (Proverbs 31:10)
Maybe when you hear the word noble your mind goes directly to a king or queen. However, another definition of noble is having or showing fine personal qualities or high moral principles and ideals.
One can argue having high moral principles and ideals is one of the most important attributes of a leader. While most companies have a code of conduct, it is your behavior in the office or how you show up that matters.
As a Christian, our moral principles and ideals are shaped by God’s Word in the Bible. At the highest level in John 15:12 we are called to love one another as Jesus has loved us. Being noble means showing our shareholders, colleagues, subordinates, customers, and even suppliers an attitude that exudes Christ’s love. Often, we see this referred to as servant leadership.
Think of Jesus washing his disciples’ feet. This seems less than noble. Feet today are smelly, but back in Jesus’ time, people walked around in hot weather, in dust and dirt. It was a servant’s job to wash feet.
We don’t need to wash feet at work, but there are simple ways to show love. Perhaps it is acknowledging a birthday or work anniversary. Maybe you celebrate your team’s success by acknowledging a job well done. Is a member of your team experiencing a trial with health or family? How can you support them?
Let’s think of another definition of noble for a moment: belonging to a hereditary class with high social or political status. I think we have all met this leader who feels anointed to their position. Someone who has an air about them who feels above people. They don’t make time or reach down to help their team. Maybe it is hard to approach them.
Focusing on high moral standards and ideals, I challenge you to read more about how Jesus served others and to look further into how the woman of noble character served others as well.
Presented by Lauren Stibgen
I am going to age myself. My first job was one I secured by applying to an ad in the newspaper. I mailed my resume and cover letter that were printed from my Smith and Corona word processor. So, here I am with almost 30 years of work under my proverbial belt. I say this because it can be so easy for me to forget what it was like to enter the workplace for the first time, aspiring to be in a higher role. And, it can be easy for me to not want to spend the time thinking about generational differences and needs in today’s workforce.
In fact, given the work I do, I often lament that I do not enjoy hiring new college graduates due to the amount of handholding it can take to work with them and the differences in how they view work. It wasn’t until I spent time with some young professionals that I saw how blind I can be. By not taking time to understand what they needed, I was not leading at all in a way that God had called. Jesus is our greatest example. He served people of all ages and vocations. Narrowing my focus was doing what served me and not what served the kingdom. The truth is, we are all experiencing firsts every single day. While someone new in their professional career may be learning what it means to step into the role of managing others, on the opposite end of the spectrum someone else is learning to let go after years of leading a team. Maybe it is letting go due to a career change or even letting go to retire. As a follower of Christ, I am called to see all of them. In the case of addressing the broken rung, I want to shift my focus to early-mid career professional women.
As Christian leaders should care about the younger professionals in our workplace. While some of us may occupy that C-Suite, the pool of upcoming women who can take our spot is dwindling. They are leaving the workplace. While the study itself doesn’t take time to address the why, I can tell you a little of what I have seen.
One of the noted issues women face, according to the McKinsey[1] study, is that of microaggressions. And women of color face microaggressions at an even greater rate than their peers. These experiences are another contributing factor to women leaving the workplace. Microaggression is defined as a statement, action, or incident regarded as an indirect, subtle, or unintentional discrimination against members of a marginalized group. As Christian working women, we need to care about the social issues other women face—especially women of different race and ethnic decent. While I consider my example of microaggression minor, it did occur, and it did impact my promotion. At the time, I was a director. I was asking for that next step up to a vice president spot. My boss at the time stated he didn’t see this being possible with my commitments as a mom—you know, having to be there to get them at school and such. I kid you not. My initial reply was that I was sorry he felt that way, and I then asked for examples of how my work had been interrupted or less than. I also inquired about the gentleman in my working group who coached football and left early three days a week. Well, you guessed it, I received the promotion. However, this is etched in my mind. It was so clear, man: ok. Woman: not ok.
The broken rung statistic from McKinsey suggests that for every 100 men promoted to manager only 87 women were promoted. Men hold up to 60% of managerial positions. Have you been passed over or felt the wind come out of your sails when you didn’t receive a position you wanted? Discouragement—this overwhelming feeling of not being chosen. As a Christian working woman, we even struggle with these feelings. Although, if we are abiding in God’s Word we know there is one who chose us before the foundations of this world—Jesus. Even in the abiding and knowing that our heavenly calling is higher, we can still sit in these feelings. As a Christian woman, we are blessed with this abiding knowledge, but many women aren’t. Without a strong community of other believers, it is easy to fall into the cycle of this world and live in the discouragement that says- not good enough=passed over.
As a Christian working women, we can not only provide support for other women at work but we are also called to use our words for building up. Ephesians 4:29 gives us a beautiful scripture to memorize.
Speaking of community, many women don’t feel supported in community with other women. At this level, many women feel they are in competition for coveted positions. This may cause friction in workplace relationships marred with jealousy. As Christian woman, this should immediately create a moment of pause. Let’s be honest about our own feelings for a moment. Forget the initial feeling of discouragement; has this turned to jealousy for you? Has this caused you to isolate and not extend yourself in ways you are called to? James 3:16 tells us that where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice. Moving away from these feelings and into community with others is critical if we are to support the growth of women in leadership at work. I will come back to this notion of community shortly.
I mentioned caring for my children above. Caring for children is another reason our “middle” is falling out of the workforce. Lack of affordable childcare can make it difficult for younger, professional women to be able to pour into their career. Coupled with inflexible work arrangements, it is a true, financial challenge that as Christian women, we can see, and if we have the means, can help address.
Now that you and I are out of the middle, and perhaps leading at a higher level—let’s say director and above, what can we do? As I prepared to talk with you today, I read another statistic. 63% of women have never been mentored. This article quoted how this negatively impacts women because mentees are promoted FIVE times more that those without mentees. Further, the McKinsey study tells us that 9/10 women under the age of 30 are seeking promotion and 3 out of 4 aspire to be become senior leaders.
Hybrid and remote work have created a barrier to these mentoring relationships. As well as we have learned to use our technology, there is no true substitute for human connection. As I engage more with the young professionals both seeking their first job and growing in their organizations, many want a hybrid role at the very least. Some want to be in an office every day. Afterall, how can they show growth and accomplishment without consistent and regular connection? Balancing this need for early career professionals with the desire for mid-level flexibility, as leaders we have more to consider.
As a Christian woman, I would remind you of the verses in Matthew 5: 14-16
You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.
Let your light shine before others! There is a giant opportunity before us as leaders. With 63% of women never having been mentored, how can you shine your light before others to see your good works? And, as a Christian, your mentorship of another may provide an even greater gift than one woman’s promotion. Perhaps she is chosen for something even more precious—a relationship with Jesus Christ.
Be intentional. If you aren’t acquainted with a formal mentoring program, seek resources online. Right now, I am in two mentoring relationships with young professional women. One came about informally and the other through a more formal program. While both women will benefit from my network and 30 years at work, I am deeply benefiting from their fresh new perspectives on work. I am learning about AI, and the gig workforce. I am learning how they learn and communicate and making some beautiful connections.
Don’t wait. Let’s lift women as we raise high the name of Jesus in all we do! Only God can repair the rung.
[1] McKinsey and Company, Women in the Workplace, 2023
I’m examining working by Jesus rules, because Jesus had lots to say about our attitude toward our work, our work habits and our performance.
I’m reminded of the time when Jesus taught Peter something about fishing. You’ll find the story in Luke 5. Jesus was walking along the shores of the Sea of Galilee and saw Peter fishing—or trying to.
He gave him some advice:
‘Put out into deep water and let down the nets for a catch’ (Luke 5:4).
Notice Peter’s answer:
‘Master, we’ve worked hard all night and haven’t caught anything. But because you say so, I will let down the nets’ (Luke 5:5).
Can’t you hear Peter’s mind working: You’re a carpenter; what do you know about fishing? I’m a fisherman; I know how and where and when to catch fish, and your instructions don’t make sense. But just because Jesus said to do it, he did and caught such a large number of fish that their nets began to break. Peter had never seen anything like this, and it humbled him as he worshiped Jesus and acknowledged Jesus had control over fish and all he had to do was obey.
Whatever your job is, Jesus knows more about it than you do. He is all-knowing, so when you’re facing some dilemma on your job, when you need help and advice, why don’t you go to Jesus first and foremost and ask him what to do? The Word of God has all kinds of good advice that is very applicable to every issue you’re facing, on the job and elsewhere.
Make it a daily habit to present your needs and requests concerning your job to Jesus and expect him to give you wisdom and strength and guidance. A good friend of mine is in a very high-powered, stressful job, which she believes is exactly where God has put her to be a witness for him. Many times, she sends me a text to pray for a specific situation she’s facing on her job. Why don’t you form a buddy-system with someone you know and agree to pray specifically for each other’s job issues. Two other friends of mine agreed to pray by phone each morning before going to work, and they did that for years. They have wonderful testimonies of how God gave them wisdom and help on their jobs.
Learn to depend on Jesus and his Word for guidance as you face tough decisions. He’s a Wonderful Counselor, and you won’t be disappointed.
Do you often compare yourself to others? If you do, you usually end up in one of two places. Either you decide you’re a lot better than others, or you decide you fall way short and don’t measure up. Comparing yourself to others is a very bad habit, often a sinful habit, and can truly handicap you.
That is one lesson we learn from the parable of the talents, which is recorded in Matthew 25. As Jesus tells this story, there are three people who start out with very different amounts—or talents—which they are to manage for their boss. One begins with five, one with two, and one of them receives just one.
The first two work hard and double their talents, so the first one now has ten, the second one has four. But what about the guy who had only one? Does he now have two? No, he still has just one because he decided not to do anything with the one he had. After all, he might lose it, and the boss wouldn’t like that. He comes up with this lame excuse that he didn’t want to lose his one measly talent, so he hid it.
If he expected to get a sympathetic response from his boss, he was badly mistaken, because the boss harshly chastised him for not multiplying what he had. Yes, he started with only one talent, but then all he had to do was come up with one more, and he would have received the same reward the other two received.
I think part of his problem was he compared his one talent with the other guys and decided he couldn’t do much with just one talent anyway, so why bother. He did nothing because he made the mistake of comparing himself with others and then throwing a pity-party.
There’s no doubt that in your job there are people of differing abilities and talents—some more gifted than others. But the issue is not what you start with; it’s how you finish. If you work by the Jesus rule, he’s not asking you to measure up to other people, but simply to be faithful to multiply what he has given to you. Comparing yourself to others will often discourage you. Just be grateful for what you have and make the most of it. That’s the Jesus rule.
No doubt you’ve heard and sung the old familiar chorus: I have decided to follow Jesus; no turning back, no turning back. It’s a good song to sing to yourself throughout your day. It reminds you that you have made a choice to be a disciple of Jesus Christ, and keeping that in your mind at all times will help you remember who you are: a Christ-follower.
For those of us who are Christ-followers, we need to be aware of what Jesus taught us concerning how we live our lives. Jesus gave us some clear principles as to how we live out our faith on our jobs. The parable of the talents, as given in Matthew 25, is a very strong teaching Jesus gave us about how we manage our time and opportunities. Three people are given differing amounts to work with: one five talents, one two, and one received only one talent.
As Jesus tells the story:
The man who had received the five talents went at once and put his money to work and gained five more. So also, the one with the two talents gained two more (Matthew 25:16-17).
Right away, one of the lessons Jesus teaches us in this parable is he expects us to work at multiplying our resources, our opportunities—to make the most of what we’ve been given. And we should get right to it—no lollygagging, no wasting time.
Are you working by this Jesus rule—to do the absolute most with what you have? Maybe you have a job that is not challenging to you; maybe you’ve been doing the same job for years, and you’re just in that old familiar rut. You do what you have to do, but that’s it. If you want to work by Jesus rules, you need to get out of that rut and start finding ways to do more with what you have.
It’s easy to just stay in our ruts, isn’t it? This year we celebrate forty years since this ministry began its first radio broadcast in 1984. Many times, during these years I’ve had to get myself out of a rut—of just doing it the way I’ve always done it. You have to be intentional about getting out of your rut and becoming creative. How about having a brainstorming or strategic planning session with others, to just think about better ways to do what you’re doing? I find that is a really good way to put some fun back in the job and do more with what you’ve been given.
Working by Jesus Rules—that’s what I’m examining. If you and I are truly Christ-followers, people who have accepted him as our Savior, then we need to understand Jesus gave us rules and guidelines for our attitudes and actions on our jobs. We need to know the Jesus rules.
In Matthew 21, Jesus tells the parable of the two sons. The father told the first son to go work in the vineyard, and that son refused to go, but later he changed his mind and went. The second son agreed to go, but then he didn’t go. Jesus asked, “Which of the two did what his father wanted?” Obviously the first son did what his father asked.
One of the things this parable teaches us is we should walk our talk. The second son gave the right answer, he looked and sounded good, but he failed to deliver. He was all talk and no walk. A good rule of thumb is under promise and over deliver. That’s what the first son did. He delivered more than he promised. His talk wasn’t very impressive, but he went out and got the work done.
Have you known people who could talk a good game but never put the elbow-grease behind their talk? They were lazy and just loved to hear themselves talk. I think many times they actually believe their own talk, but somehow, they never produce. I’d rather have a quiet, hard-working, no-nonsense worker any day than a smooth talker.
Are you a reliable person in your job? Does your boss know you can be depended on to do the job and do it right? That’s working by Jesus rules. You may not be the smartest or the fastest person on the job, but you can always be the most dependable and the hardest working. One way to make a lasting good impression is to be the kind of person who doesn’t have to be watched or reminded. It’s a joy to have workers who are so dependable you never have to follow-up and stay on their case. You just know they will do what you asked, and they’ll do it as quickly as they can.
We represent Jesus Christ on our jobs, and one of our trademarks should be we walk our talk.
Jesus tells a parable in Matthew 20 that is a puzzle for us to understand. It’s the story of an employer who offers to hire workers for a certain amount, the workers agree to the pay, and they go to work in his vineyard. Some start work early in the morning and work all day; others are hired throughout the day; and finally at five o’clock this employer hires even more people to come and work in the vineyard.
At the end of the workday, the employer pays them the exact same amount, even though some have worked twelve hours, some ten, and some just one hour. Well, as you can understand, those who worked the entire day were not happy campers.
When they received it (the pay they had agreed to), they began to grumble against the landowner. ‘These who were hired last worked only one hour,’ they said, ‘and you have made them equal to us who have borne the burden of the work and the heat of the day’ (Matthew 20:11-12).
And as Jesus tells this parable, this is how the landowner responds:
But he answered one of them, ‘I am not being unfair to you, friend. Didn’t you agree to work for a denarius? Take your pay and go. I want to give the one who was hired last the same as I gave you. Don’t I have the right to do what I want with my own money? Or are you envious because I am generous?’ (Matthew 20:13-15).
I’m examining working by Jesus rules, the rules that apply to those of us who are Christ-followers and who want to please Jesus. And his message here is we are to work without envy. We are not to envy what others get or have or do. Envy will eat you alive.
A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones (Proverbs 14:30).
Is there some envy in your heart today—toward coworkers or others? It will rot your bones—destroy your health, shorten your life. If you want to work by Jesus rules, then you need to clean out the envy in your heart. Believe me, you’ll be so glad you did.
I remember as I was putting the finishing touches on one of my Bible studies, I asked several people to critique it for me. I had enough sense to know that I needed other eyes looking at it, seeing what I couldn’t see, if I really wanted that Bible study to be as good as it could be. But frankly, I didn’t want to hear the criticisms I had solicited. And I had to fight with everything in me to keep from being defensive as suggestions were made to improve the study.
Now, if I feel that way about solicited criticisms, you can imagine how I react to unsolicited criticisms. It is a very hard thing for me to handle—I have to be honest with you. Reviews of my books frighten me; I have to make myself read them. I fear they will be negative, and that would be painful. I can relate with Job who said in Job 6:24-25: Teach me, and I will be quiet; show me where I have been wrong. How painful are honest words. It seems Job had the same type of reaction to criticism that I do.
Well, it’s a weakness, and it’s one I must overcome. Because I need good honest criticism, I need input from others so I can improve, so I can avoid making the same mistakes all the time, so I can see myself and how others perceive me more accurately. I NEED IT, but I don’t want it.
How would you rate yourself when it comes to handling criticism? Would your score, like mine, be on the low side? Well, how can we improve? We don’t have to be this way forever. Jesus has victory for us in every area, and that includes handling criticism. So, let’s talk about it.
Handling criticism well is a sign of maturity, both spiritual and emotional maturity. I’m discovering that as I am more and more confident of who I am in Christ and how much he loves me, the better I am at accepting criticism. As I grow spiritually with God, I also grow emotionally. Have you ever thought about that? The two go hand-in-hand.
Spiritual growth—knowing who God is and how we relate to him and how he relates to us—brings emotional growth. So, I notice that as I spend time getting to know God, immersing myself in God’s Word, and filling my mind with his thoughts, my emotional weaknesses begin to improve. So, as in every other area of our lives, the starting point for learning to handle criticism well is to get to know God better, spending time in his Word, communicating with him regularly and growing continually in our understanding of God and our faith.
And then, if we’re going to learn to handle criticism correctly, we’ve got to have the right attitude toward it. If we look at it as something negative, then obviously we’ll handle it poorly. It reminds me of my first job in sales with IBM. We weren’t allowed to have problems; we were instead faced with many opportunities! A positive outlook on any situation can make a huge difference in how we react.
If you can learn to think of criticism as a helpful tool in your life which can accelerate your own growth and learning curve, then that takes a lot of the pain out of criticism and gives you a good starting place for handling it correctly. So, the next time a criticism comes your way, send up a quick silent prayer and ask the Lord to help you see this as an instrument of good in your life. That way you can turn the pain into gain. Yes, the criticism was painful, but now you can make a painful experience a stair-step towards improvement, so you don’t suffer for nothing! That makes sense, doesn’t it?
What else can you do to teach yourself to handle criticism better? Well, you surely need to pray that God will give you a teachable heart and make you able to accept criticism appropriately. That’s always a necessity for us as Christians when we recognize an area in our life that needs strengthening. We read in 1 Corinthians 11:31 that “if we were more discerning with regard to ourselves, we would not come under such judgment.” We can judge ourselves by asking God to show us our weaknesses and praying about them, and that’s a lot better than waiting for someone else to judge us.
Often, I pray the prayer in Psalm 19:12 where the Psalmist says, who can discern his errors? Forgive my hidden faults. It’s difficult to discern your own errors, so we need feedback—sometimes in the form of criticism—to help us see those hidden faults and then do something about them.
Frequently, however, we do just the opposite—we bury our heads in the sand and refuse to face our weaknesses. I can think of a person who really needs some help in one of her skills; her weakness in a certain area is very noticeable, and it wouldn’t take much at all to correct it. However, because she can’t handle any criticism, no one dares to approach her. Obviously, she is the loser because of her inability to face her own weaknesses or accept any criticism.
Well, I understand the desire to run away from criticism—I have the same initial reaction. But Proverbs 9:9 says: Instruct a wise man and he will be wiser still; teach a righteous man and he will add to his learning. So, it’s very important that we are teachable, and that we continually ask God to make us more and more teachable.
Another good principle to learn in handling criticism is to remember to never get defensive about the criticism, even if it’s unfair. Listen to it without defending yourself. That’s so easy to say, but so hard to do, isn’t it? I know because defensiveness is always my first reaction. At the moment the criticism comes your way, your emotions are probably a bit out of control, and you need to wait before you speak. Give yourself time before you respond to it. Give the pain a chance to subside, make sure you’re rested, and then consider the validity of the criticism.
I’m not saying we should accept all criticism as valid, but I am saying that at the moment it is delivered, we’re not usually objective enough to make a good decision about the criticism. So, a good response is to say very little, and by all means, don’t start defending yourself. I have learned that if I react right away in these types of situations, it is usually the wrong reaction. But if I wait, I can make a fairly objective assessment and react properly.
One way to handle a criticism at the time it’s delivered, without allowing yourself to react at that point, is to thank them for telling you. That buys you some time to get control of your feelings. You can always say, “You know, I really appreciate you sharing that with me. That gives me something to think about, and I will.” But remember that while you’re in react mode, you’re not totally in control, so buy yourself some time, keep your words to a minimum, and give it some thought after your emotions have settled down.
We also need to learn to avoid letting criticism send us on a guilt trip. Criticisms are either valid or invalid. When they’re valid, we simply need to make the necessary changes. When they’re invalid, we need to get it out of our head and forget about it. But in either case, we don’t need to dump more guilt on our head.
Going on needless guilt trips is so self-defeating. God doesn’t intend for us to be guilt-ridden, and we don’t have to allow criticism to inject guilt in our lives. Once you have assessed the criticism, objectively faced the issue, and taken whatever action is necessary, then the guilt should go. Don’t be surprised to discover that your enemy, Satan, will lurk around at every corner waiting for an opportunity to dump guilt on your head. He’ll try to constantly remind you of the criticism after it’s been taken care of. That’s when you need to stand up to him and claim the victory over guilt that is yours in Jesus Christ.
Another good thing is to learn to solicit criticism when appropriate. A good sign of maturity is recognizing you don’t know it all and asking the appropriate people to give you some constructive, helpful criticism. Of course, you need to know that the person has your best interests at heart and is capable of giving you good advice in that area. But don’t just ask people who will say only good things to you. If you really want to improve in some area, solicit good criticism from the right people. It’s easier to handle criticism when you solicit it, and it’s very helpful to get input from others.
Now, you probably have realized that some people just don’t know how to give criticism well. They may be well intentioned, but the form it comes in can be difficult to handle. It’s often true that managers aren’t well trained in delivering constructive criticism. Proverbs 16:21 says that pleasant words promote instruction, and managers would do well to be aware of that.
I think that’s another area where I need some strong improvement, and that is to learn to deliver criticisms in a softer way. When it is your job to offer a constructive criticism, ask God to give you discernment about that person. Different people handle criticism very differently, and we need to be sensitive to their feelings. However, when it is our duty to deliver a needed criticism, we must be willing to do it even if that person has an initial reaction of defensiveness or non-acceptance. Even if they never change, we should not neglect our responsibility to offer the criticism they need in the kindest way possible for their good.
However, when it’s not our job to offer constructive criticism, we need to learn to keep our mouths shut and allow people to learn through their own mistakes. We parents have trouble with this, especially as our children grow up. Recently a woman told me that her grown daughter and son-in-law told her she interfered too much and was too critical. She said to me, “I just want to help them, and when I see them making a mistake, I try to give them good advice.” But they perceived it as criticism and interference.
I said to her, “Just pray and don’t say anything.” That was rather direct advice, I realize, but there is a time when you back away, let your grown children make their own mistakes and learn, pray a lot for them, and give advice and criticism only when asked, for the most part. Obviously, if you have a child walking in paths of sin and destruction, God may lead you to give them a warning. But even then, in the end the decision is still theirs.
Remember that if you’re on the receiving end of a criticism that is delivered poorly, you’ll do yourself a great favor by making every effort to hear the criticism and not let the delivery get to you. Separate the form from the content. Look behind poor delivery for good motives, and you may discover some very meaningful information to help you.
If you’re like me, I like warm fuzzies a lot better than criticism, but I need honest criticism. Without it my growth and effectiveness will be diminished, and I don’t want that.
Proverbs 19:20 says: Listen to advice and accept discipline, and at the end you will be counted among the wise. And in Proverbs 13:18 we read, Whoever disregards discipline comes to poverty and shame, but whoever heeds correction is honored. We need to put discipline into our lives, which allows us to handle criticism correctly. We are the winners when we do.
Do you know how to motivate people? The ability to motivate people and inspire them is absolutely essential if you want to be an effective leader. Even as leaders in our homes, we need to know how to motivate our children and even our mates.
When I speak of motivation, I want to be clear I’m not speaking about manipulation. Trying to manipulate people to do what we want them to do is deceptive and wrong. But if we’re doing something worthwhile and we need others to come alongside, then we must learn how to motivate them so they will take ownership and want to succeed with us.
We’ve looked at a few principles from the life of Nehemiah. He was called by God to do a monumental task—rebuild the broken walls of Jerusalem. Obviously, he needed help, and he had to find a way to motivate the few Jews that were left to undertake this huge project.
Then I said to them, “You see the trouble we are in: Jerusalem lies in ruins, and its gates have been burned with fire. Come, let us rebuild the wall of Jerusalem, and we will no longer be in disgrace.” I also told them about the gracious hand of my God upon me and what the king had said to me. They replied, “Let us start rebuilding.” So, they began this good work (Nehemiah 2:17-18).
Nehemiah presented the problem to them and underscored the fact it was a disgrace to them for the walls of Jerusalem to be in ruins. He assures them of God’s guidance in this task and challenges them to join him in rebuilding the wall. And they readily agreed.
In motivating others, we must always present the challenge and the benefit. I find people really love to be challenged, to push the envelope and do what looks difficult or impossible. Presented in the right way, it will motivate people to join with you, provided they can see the need and the benefit.
Nehemiah told them what they already knew—that the ruined wall of Jerusalem was a disgrace to their nation. He motivated them through patriotism and loyalty to God. Once they shared Nehemiah’s vision, they were willing to commit themselves to rebuild the wall.
Ask God to show you how to motivate others appropriately, how to cast the vision, and make the rewards and benefits obvious. It is a very important characteristic of an effective leader.
Do you know how to keep a secret? We are examining some principles from Nehemiah because he was a very successful leader and motivator, as well as a very godly man. And we can learn much from him.
One of his secrets of success was he knew how to keep a secret. After asking for and receiving permission from his boss, King Artaxerxes, to return to Jerusalem to rebuild the walls, he arrives there to do this seemingly impossible task. In chapter two verse twelve we read,
I had not told anyone what my God had put in my heart to do for Jerusalem (Nehemiah 2:12).
Now why was it important for Nehemiah to keep his own confidence? If he had ridden into Jerusalem and started pronouncing to everyone his intention to rebuild the broken walls, they would have thought he was mad. Who did he think he was anyway? He realized this had to be approached very wisely and carefully, and he had to show the people it could be done. He needed a plan and he needed to take his time to do it right. He kept his mouth shut until the appropriate time.
Those who guard their lips preserve their lives, but those who speak rashly will come to ruin (Proverbs 13:3).
Those who guard their mouths and their tongues keep themselves from calamity (Proverbs 21:23).
A trustworthy person keeps a secret (Proverbs 11:13).
Speaking rashly always leads to regrets. How many times have you wanted to cut your tongue out because you said something rashly, told something you should have kept in confidence or said something that was not carefully thought-out? It is so true guarding our mouths will keep us from calamity.
Nehemiah could have destroyed any possibility of rebuilding that wall—doing what God had called him to do—if he had not controlled his tongue and kept his own confidence until the time was appropriate. We can benefit greatly by following his example.
I wonder if you’ve read the book of Nehemiah lately. You’ll find it in the Old Testament between Ezra and Esther, a book of thirteen chapters, and filled with practical help for us today. I encourage you to read it again or for the first time. You will be blessed to see how this man of God, Nehemiah, tackled what looked like an impossible task, rebuilding the walls of Jerusalem, and did it in record time.
In chapter two, verse eight, Nehemiah says,
Because the gracious hand of my God was upon me, the king granted my requests.
Nehemiah had asked his boss, the king, for some time off to go back to Jerusalem and repair the walls. This was a gutsy request on his part, and he prayed much before asking. But he believed it was God’s will for him to do this, and he took courage and asked for permission.
When the king grants his request, he immediately gives praise and credit to the Lord and his gracious hand. Nehemiah was a truly humble man, who was quick to give God the glory for his success. He was not too proud to ask the king for this favor, and when the favor was granted, he was humble and not proud of it. No bragging on his part, but true humility.
You know, to be an effective leader, we must first know when we need help from others and how to ask for that help. Nehemiah made his request in a very respectful manner, fully aware of his position before the king. He could never have gone back to Jerusalem to build those walls without the king’s permission, and once it was granted, he didn’t gloat or take it for granted. He gave God praise.
I find one of the things a good leader must do is to know when to ask for help and where to go for that help. None of us is an island, as the poet reminds us, and we need others. Again and again in Scripture we see this principle of our dependence on each other in the body of Christ, and the importance of working together. One of the lessons I’ve had to learn as a leader is that it is not a sign of weakness to admit you need help. Nor it is an imposition to ask others to help you. Most often you open up opportunities for others to use their gifts and be a part of the success by asking for their help.
Learn from Nehemiah’s example of seeking help when needed, and giving credit where it is due. Again, it is the sign of a good leader and a mature person to acknowledge the part others have played and give them credit for their contributions.
I am examining leadership principles from the life of Nehemiah. Now, maybe you’re thinking you’re not a leader, but all of us are, in some way or another. And these principles are relevant to everyone.Yesterday we saw a leader knows how to handle bad news. In the second chapter of Nehemiah, we find he was open and vulnerable. You see, he worked for King Artaxerxes, and nobody was allowed to look sad or unhappy in the king’s presence. In fact, the death penalty was the punishment for sad-looking servants. But with a heavy heart about his people and the condition of Jerusalem, Nehemiah looked sad in the king’s presence.Nehemiah did not hide his grief and sadness. He wasn’t trying to make others feel bad, but he wasn’t putting on a “happy face,” as we say.Psychologists say 80 percent of our emotional strength frequently goes into wearing a mask, pretending to be someone we are not. Think about it—when you ask someone how they are doing, how often do people say anything except “fine.” Now, I’m not suggesting we start dumping our problems on anyone who asks, “How are you?” But I do believe far too often we put on a mask and pretend to be who we are not, when we need to be openly honest.There is great relief in developing this characteristic of not being afraid to reveal who we really are. You can be much more relaxed when you accept yourself the way you are, acknowledging your weaknesses and also recognizing your strengths. It is a sign of spiritual and emotional maturity to be honest about yourself.I remember going to Uganda and Kenya to minister to women in Christian leadership, and the women were kind enough to write notes of appreciation for my teaching. I noticed many of them said things like, “Thank you for opening up to us,” and “Thank you for speaking from personal experience.” Being real and open can be used mightily by God to build bridges to other people and open up possibilities for ministry that would otherwise be closed.Remember, God has called us to be authentic and not to wear a mask. As the Apostle Paul wrote, By the grace of God I am who I am, and there is no reason to cover up who we are in Christ.
I am examining some important leadership principles from the book of Nehemiah. You may wonder what an Old Testament saint could teach us about leadership today, but you’ll discover these truths are timeless. Nehemiah was both an outstanding spiritual leader and a very good business manager, and we can learn a great deal from him.One of the first principles we learn from Nehemiah is he knew how to handle bad news. We read in chapter one of Nehemiah that his brother brought him the bad news that Jerusalem’s wall was broken down, its gates had been burned, and those who survived were in great trouble. Well, that would be enough to discourage anyone. But Nehemiah does not fall apart, even at this bad news.Life is full of bad news. It could be a small disappointment to a catastrophic occurrence, but when bad news comes your way, how do you respond? A strong leader is not only able to take the bad news but wants to know it. Sticking your head in the sand is a sure sign of immaturity and lack of trust in God.If you are a manager on your job, a leader in your church, or have an influential position of any kind, you need to make certain people around you don’t hide the bad news from you. Of course, they’ll be more likely to tell you bad news if they are confident your reaction will be reasonable and controlled. You can’t let bad news rattle you. You will lose the confidence of those who look up to you, and it will make matters worse.David had to face many bad news situations. In one case, he returned with his 600 soldiers to Ziklag and found the enemy had robbed them of everything and set fire to the city. His men were so upset they wanted to kill David. But David did not panic. The Bible says simply: David found strength in the Lord his God (1 Sam. 30:6b). Then he asks the Lord what to do, and under God’s direction, he pursued the enemy and recovered all that was lost.Interestingly, both David and Nehemiah mourned and wept at their bad news, but they didn’t stay there. They prayed for guidance and obeyed the Lord.Do you fall into depression when things do not go well? We can learn a very valuable lesson from Nehemiah on how to handle bad news.
Did you ever think about what kind of impression you make on people? We create these impressions through our communications with others. Basically, we communicate in three ways: verbally, the words we speak; vocally, the tone of our voice; and non-verbally, our body language, facial expressions, etc. Frequently we don't even realize that what we're doing is causing poor or negative impressions.As Christians working in a world that needs to know Christ, we should make the best impression we can. We are, after all, ambassadors for Jesus Christ; we represent him to our world. Since we are perceived by others by the way we communicate with them—including our verbal, vocal and non-verbal communications—don't you think we should be intentional about improving in all those areas, so that we put “our best foot forward,” so to speak?Paul wrote in 2 Corinthians 8:21: For we are taking pains to do what is right, not only in the eyes of the Lord but also in the eyes of men. Taking pains to do what is right—that's a good way to put it, because it really does take effort and concentration to do what is right sometimes. So, let’s talk about these three areas of communications and perhaps give you some ideas about how you can improve—take a few extra pains to do what is right—so that you are making the best impression you can.Verbal SkillsVerbal communication is our choice of words. You've probably heard the jingle that says, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” Well, don't believe it. Words can and do hurt very much. Many times, people react not to the message we have given them, but rather to the way we gave the message.Think of how often someone has given you some work to do, but she didn't ask in a nice way; no please or thank you. She just demanded you do it and showed no consideration for what you were doing already. If you think about it, you probably reacted very poorly not because you didn't want to do the work, but simply because she didn't ask in a nice or considerate way.The Bible tells us that: Sweetness of speech increases persuasiveness (Proverbs 16:21 ESV). If we choose our words carefully, not only will it be good for the other person, but we'll discover that we are more persuasive and effective in reaching people.Watch out for phrases like It's not my fault. It's not my job. That's not a good idea. You can't do that. You'll have to wait until tomorrow. That's so stupid. That's a dumb idea. Remember that you don't like to be told what to do; you don't like to be talked down to in a condescending way; you don't like to be scolded or humiliated or made fun of. So, be careful not to use words that sound demanding, condescending or humiliating to others.In a meeting one woman was expressing a concern for her parents, and without thinking, another person told her what to do, in a very direct, dictatorial way. I know this person meant very well; she was really trying to help. But the way she communicated, both in her choice of words and the dictatorial tone of her voice, just brought a cold blanket over the whole meeting.Try your best to avoid sounding like a dictator. Put your instructions in the form of a question; it works beautifully. Instead of "You'll have to call back later," say instead, "Could I ask you to call back later?” Slight change of words but what a difference it makes. Remember, no one likes to be told what to do, so ask instead.Be especially careful about your choice of words when you have to give someone bad news. Undoubtedly there are times on your job and otherwise when you are required to tell people something they really don't want to hear. When you have bad news, at least soften the blow. Proverbs 16:24 says: Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones. If you'll soften the blow, they'll handle the bad news better.Proverbs 25:11 tells us that: Like apples of gold in settings of silver is a ruling r...
Presented by Lisa BishopI am examining 5 habits of an extraordinary leader, and today we’re wrapping up with: be reliable.Before we dive into our final leadership habit, I want to acknowledge you’ve most likely heard about these skills and habits. While these competencies may sound like common sense, ask yourself, “Do I make these skills my common practice?” There is a big difference between knowing about something and actually doing it and living it out. As you gauge your leadership, measure it by the degree these habits are regular and consistent. Consistency is key. Being consistent in positive actions and behaviors will help you create trust with those you lead. Others will see you as reliable.When you are reliable you keep your commitments. You do what you say you are going to do. You follow-through. One of the quickest ways for you to lose trust and undermine your leadership is by not keeping your word.Sounds simple, doesn’t it? Yet, how many times have you said you would do something and dropped the ball or neglected to carry out what you committed to?In Matthew 5:37, Jesus says, all you need to say is simply yes or no. Now the context of this verse has to do with oath-keeping and is part of the sermon on the mount when Jesus is addressing the subject of telling the truth. He tells the crowd not to break their oaths. An oath was a promise to do or not do something, invoking God as a witness and the one to bring judgment if the promise was broken. Back in the day, it was common for people to make oaths to emphasize their seriousness and truthfulness. While you are most likely not invoking God as your witness when you make commitments at work, this biblical truth applies to your witness as a follower of Jesus. Are you impeccable with your word? Do you have a reputation as someone who says something and does it? Or do you say you will get back to someone, but you never do or fail to complete a task that you agreed to. The reality is there are no small things when it comes to keeping your word.Our reliability is questioned when what we might consider the insignificant things are in fact significant to others. To be an extraordinary leader, have integrity and be faithful to your word so others know they can rely on you.
Presented by Lisa BishopDo you express genuine appreciation for others? I am examining 5 habits of an extraordinary leader. And today is the fourth habit: show appreciation.Gary Chapman’s book The Five Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace shares a statistic that 65% of North Americans reported they had not received recognition or appreciation at their workplace in the past year. And while 51% of managers believe they do a good job of recognizing employees for work well done, only 17% of employees believe their manager actually does a good job of recognizing them[1]. Clearly, something is off!Data shows 79% of employees will quit their jobs due to a lack of appreciation (Zippia.com), while employees who feel valued are motivated to do their best work[2].How regularly do you show appreciation in the workplace? It’s been said encouragement is oxygen to the soul.Just as every person has inherent value, every human being has a desire (whether they will admit it or not) to feel valued and appreciated; it’s one of the deepest and most basic human needs. While it’s been proven there is a bottom-line benefit to organizations for fostering a gratitude culture in the workplace, the buck doesn’t stop there. As a leader, and especially as a follower of Jesus, you are entrusted with tapping into the potential of the people in your care, helping them unleash their gifts and talents. This is a different mentality than, “Just do your job.” You have a high calling for cultivating a work environment that is built on an attitude of trust and to inspire and not to embrace the old “command and control” mindset.How can you genuinely show appreciation? Don’t just show gratitude for what people do, show appreciation for who they are. Be specific, rather than general, saying “Hey, good job on that project,” doesn’t point out what you specifically valued. Instead, it might sound something like this. “Hey Jim, I just wanted to say I really appreciated your attention to detail on the presentation last week. You do your work with excellence, and you bring a lot of heart and passion to the team.”When showing appreciation, go beyond pointing out a person’s performance to acknowledging their intrinsic value too.Dr. Paul White says, “Even the hardest heart will soften and respond to a freely given ‘cup of water’ of appreciation—reviving their spirit and creating new growth.”How will you make showing genuine appreciation a leadership habit in your life? Who is someone in your workplace you will encourage this week?--[1] Chapman, G. D., White, P. E., & White, P. (2012). The 5 Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace: Empowering Organizations by Encouraging People. Northfield Publishing.[2] Kizer, K. (2023, June 29). 35+ powerful leadership statistics [2023]: Things all aspiring leaders should know. Zippia. https://www.zippia.com/advice/leadership-statistics/
Presented by Lisa BishopI am examining 5 habits of an extraordinary leader. And today we’ll talk about the third habit: be an empathic listener.How do we practice empathic listening? When you listen empathically, it means you are listening intently and deeply to another person with the resolve to understand them and not with the goal to respond.Think of the last conversation you had at work or home with your spouse or teenage kid. Were you focused on listening to them in a way they felt heard or was your mind racing with a response, your lips poised to give advice or blurt out your point of view? If we’re honest a lot of our communication is spent trying to get our thoughts across and have others listen to us. We can be so committed to our way of thinking we make assumptions about what another person means before they finish communicating. Empathic listening flips the script.Proverbs 20:5 instructs,The purposes of a person’s heart are deep waters, but one who has insight draws them out.When you listen to understand, you not only increase the chance of the person feeling heard, but there is a very high probability—especially in conversations where emotions run high—you will draw out the real issue. The next time someone comes to you with a problem, frustration, worry, concern, or complaint, resist the urge to judge, fix, or give advice. Instead, employ empathic listening. Let them know you hear them by paraphrasing their words and reflecting back the emotion you are sensing them express. For example, imagine your coworker comes into your office in a panic and says, “I’m completely overwhelmed and frustrated with this job. I just don’t think I can do it anymore.”Now your instinct may be to start commiserating or giving your opinion or advice, and while there may be a proper time and place for that, first try responding in a way your coworker feels like you are listening and hearing what they said. You might say something like, “It sounds like you feel discouraged at work.” Or, “I hear you’re frustrated.” And then just stop and let the person respond. Don’t be afraid of silence. When you listen this way, it creates a space for the person to keep talking and for you to gain greater understanding. If you are not used to listening in this way it can feel awkward at first but try it in the workplace or at home. See what happens when you press pause on fixing and advising and listen with the intent to truly understand.
Presented by Lisa BishopI am examining 5 habits of an extraordinary leader. Yesterday’s habit was to be a learner. Today’s habit is to be present. One way to practice presence is through your listening. We all have been taught listening is important, but few people have mastered this critical skill. You may already think you are a good listener, but there is a big difference between listening and hearing. And whether you listen or don’t, it will affect your impact as a leader.When you are in a leadership role, you create the tone of your team and your organization. Your actions directly influence the level of trust, collaboration, and contribution you inspire in the people who work with and for you. Being truly present and listening in a way people feel heard and understood creates an experience for people. They sense you really care, and when you demonstrate a genuine interest in other people, you increase trust. How can you level up your leadership through listening? By practicing presence. One way to do this is by maintaining eye contact. I once worked for a senior leader who rarely paid attention when people talked. In one-on-one conversations, if he were anywhere near his computer, he would give a hand motion for someone to start talking but he would keep looking at his screen. In meetings, he would constantly check his phone or be on his iPad. It was pretty deflating for the team, and if I am honest, it was very frustrating, especially when he was the one who called the meeting.Your lack of listening shows a lack of interest. When you are in conversation with someone, put the phone down, turn it over, or better yet put it in your pocket or bag. Studies have shown just merely holding your cell phone or keeping it visible on the table while you are conversing can have an adverse effect on listening. So, be intentional and give the individual talking your entire focus.If we look to the example of Jesus, we see he was fully present with people. He had a million things to tend to, yet when someone was face to face with him, he gave them his full attention. He did not allow himself to be easily distracted or fall into the temptation of multitasking.Do you create an experience for people where they feel your focus is on them when they are talking? Who is someone you can practice being present with today? When you truly listen to others, it’s a gift.
Presented by Lisa BishopWhat makes a great leader? If you are like me, you have worked for great leaders and not-so-great leaders. If you are a leader, you probably have found yourself in both of those categories. I want to equip you with 5 habits of an extraordinary leader. Leadership is influence and how you lead impacts others.The first habit of an extraordinary leader is the habit of being a learner. Being a learner not only means seeking the technical skills necessary for your job or role, but it also implies you actively and consistently pursue personal character growth.Proverbs 19:20 gives us a clarion call when it says,Listen to advice and accept discipline, and at the end you will be counted among the wise.Good leaders, even leaders who have led for 20 years or more, have a posture of being coachable and teachable. One way you can position yourself to learn and grow is by asking for and humbly receiving feedback.Whether you lead in the workplace, home, your community, or your church, intentionally ask others to share their observations about your leadership, what you do well, and where you can improve. The truth is you simply cannot grow without feedback. We all have blind spots. They are called that for a reason. Several years ago, I solicited feedback from a few coworkers. The feedback I received from one co-worker cut pretty deep. But I was and continue to be truly grateful for her candor. It caused me to see how I was unintentionally impacting others and as a result, I made a massive shift in the way I led.If something were limiting your leadership, wouldn’t you want to know about it—even if it stings a bit? A few words of caution. When you ask for feedback, even if you do not agree with the person’s perspective, keep your defenses at bay, express your gratitude for what they shared, and sit with the feedback long enough to sift through it and pray about it. Ask God what he might be highlighting to you that could help you. And when you receive feedback, do something with it. There’s little worse than receiving feedback and then not doing a darn thing to improve on what was pointed out. People will be frustrated, and you will lose credibility.Who can you ask to give you feedback? Pick a person or two you trust will tell you the truth and be grateful for the growth it brings.
Presented by Lisa BishopMy intent in our conversation is not to point out the failings of the Church. I love the Church. There is way too much division, backbiting, finger pointing, and blame between believers these days. Rather, my motive is to point our attention to the fact that you and I can be fooled into believing we are beyond temptation and think, “Oh that would never be me.” But when you are not careful and alert, this very thought can lead to being lured into ungodly patterns and actions which have a devastating impact on your life, the lives of others, your witness, and your leadership. In the lines of the well-known worship song, we are all “prone to wander.”You may be in a place where your relationship with God is thriving, and those you lead are reaping the fruit of your faith being lived out to the fullest. You may find yourself skating on the edge of making ungodly choices. Perhaps you have fallen hook line and sinker into sin, and you don’t know how to get out. I pray this conversation wakes you up, strengthens you, encourages you, and emboldens you to center or recenter your mind, heart, and soul on Jesus.In 1 Peter 5:8-9a, the apostle warns, Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith.The Greek word for devour means to destroy or to swallow. The devil wants to shake your faith and make you an ineffective follower and witness of Christ, which is why it is important to be sober and vigilant. The term sober means “free from intoxicating influences.” It means not allowing yourself to be influenced by anything that leads you away from God’s truth and sound judgment.We are all prone to intoxication! If you think you’re not, that may be a sign you are.As Proverbs 16:18 says, Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall. There is pride in thinking you are not prone to be sucked in by sin. And intoxicating influence comes in many forms.From a harmless lunch with a coworker that leads to an unhealthy emotional connection, to outbursts of anger that give you a false sense of control; the temptation for power and prestige; fudging the numbers on that report to make yourself look good; dabbling with pornography because you deceive yourself into thinking “It’s not hurting anyone.”These are not words of condemnation but rather encouragement for you and me to remain vigilant. To be vigilant means “to keep careful watch for possible danger or difficulties.” Vigilance is not passive; it requires action. When you are vigilant, you actively pay attention to what is vying for your affection and impacting your heart and mind. Even those who truly love God are not exempt from the enticing nature of sin.King David, well known as a man after God’s own heart, demonstrates the rise and fall of leadership. He was a man after God’s heart, but David did not guard his own heart when he fell down the slippery slope of temptation. When we read the account of his adultery with Bathsheba, we see distinct opportunities where David, a married man and a king, could have turned away from the intoxicating influence of his flesh. When he stood on his rooftop and saw Bathsheba bathing David could have made the choice to high tail it out of there, but he chose to look and linger. He didn’t take the way out of sin’s enticement, and it led to him sleeping with another man’s wife, who became pregnant. If you know David’s story, this sin led to more sin. In an attempt to cover up the affair, David orders Bethsheba's husband killed. It sounds crazy that gazing at a beautiful woman led to murder, but sin does that. When we don’t resist temptation and tiptoe close to it, all of a sudden we can find ourselves asking, “How did I get here?” We rarely if ever think we could be susceptible to such a great transgression. As we see from David’s life, sin does not stay contained; our sin impacts others....
Why was Jesus such a great leader? He had the best people skills ever. Let me briefly point out just a few examples.He was able to communicate a vision of what people could become. "Follow me," he said to some poor fishermen, "and I will make you fishers of men." He told his disciples they would do even greater things than he had done. He beautifully communicated the vision and importance of what he was asking people to do.Another reason Jesus was such a terrific people person is he made the benefits and rewards very clear. "I came to give you abundant life," he promised. "Great will be your reward in heaven," he told them. "I'm going to prepare a place for you," he said. He understood the importance of work-related benefits and rewards.Jesus was wonderful with people because he was willing to forgive them and give them many second chances. He didn't give up on someone just because they had failed. Think of Peter; he denied Jesus three times, but Jesus restored him to fellowship, and Peter became the rock of the early church.And Jesus was able to relate so beautifully with people because he had a servant attitude. He came to serve, not to be served, he said, and he demonstrated it over and over again. Just imagine: the God-man coming to earth to serve mankind. Incredible but true. He was a servant.But mostly, Jesus was successful as a leader because he truly loved and cared for each individual and put their interest above his own. He loved so much that he died—for me and you. No wonder he changed the course of all history. Was there ever anyone like him? No never! But the incredible news is as believers, we have his Spirit in us, and are being transformed into his image.Ask yourself, how are your people skills? Do you communicate a vision to people? Are you willing to reward those who earn it? Do you give people a second chance? Are you a servant-leader? And do you truly care for others? Those are some of the attributes that made Jesus so special.
Jesus was a great leader because. . . There are many characteristics that made Jesus the most outstanding leader who has ever lived. We've been looking at just a few of those this week. For example, Jesus was a great leader because he always had time for little people.His disciples wanted him to speak to a great crowd that had gathered on one occasion, but he said he had planned to preach in the nearby villages. He took time from a hectic schedule to walk a long way and heal Jairus's little daughter; he stopped in a crowd to find one woman who had touched him and heal her blood disease; he saw a short little man in a tree and asked to have dinner with him. Jesus focused on individuals, and it didn't matter who they were. They were all important to him.Don't you think sometimes we are caught up in the "star" mentality? Or do we only want to be involved in something with lots of people and big numbers? I have often said of all the wonderful opportunities God has given me to minister, my favorite was Sunday mornings with my small class of women, Sisters in Christ, who are still such a wonderful support group for me. It can become an ego trip to focus only on the numbers in the crowd; often the greatest blessing comes in the small groups.The same principle holds true on our jobs. A successful sales person is one who spends time with the small clients as well as the large ones. Those small sales can grow into big ones later on, and they'll stay with you if you pay attention to them when they're small. But many sales people only want to deal with the large ticket customers.I think of one of our board members who was a very successful lawyer. One of Steve's most outstanding attributes—and I'm sure one of the reasons for his success—is his attention to the little people. They aren't little to him and he always has time to talk and care about their needs.It is a mistake to put people into "big" and "small" categories. Jesus never did, and that's one reason we are all so attracted to him. I'm still amazed and grateful to think in the midst of this huge universe, he knows my name, he talks to me, and he always has time to spend with me. Shouldn't we have the same attitude toward others?
Is your life full of celebration? Did you ever realize Jesus was always ready to celebrate? I think that is one reason he was a great leader and people loved to be with him. His first miracle was to turn water into wine at a wedding celebration, thereby putting his stamp of approval on what some might call a frivolous waste of time and money—a big wedding celebration. We see he often went to people's homes for dinner. He wasn't too busy to take time for these personal times of celebration.He didn't want the crowds who came to hear him speak to leave with an empty stomach, so he turned a boy's lunch into food for thousands—a regular party. Two of his most famous parables are about a king who arranged a banquet and got angry when nobody came, and a father throwing a lavish party when his wayward son returned home.How much and how often do you celebrate in your own life—on your job, in your home? We should look for reasons to celebrate. We can get so serious and so focused we forget to say, "Hey, you've done a great job; let's bring in pizza this afternoon and celebrate." Or "You've been working so hard, you deserve a treat; the ice cream is on me; let's go celebrate."From small to big events, we can add so much vitality and joy to our lives and to others by taking time to celebrate. Look for excuses to celebrate for yourself and for your coworkers or staff, as well as your family and friends.Now you may think this doesn't sound terribly important or spiritual, but celebrating should be a part of our daily routines. It encourages and motivates people. It lightens their loads. It focuses on positive rather than negative things. There are lots of good, spiritual reasons to be a celebrating type of person. Jesus was.So, today, as you're going through your day, look for a reason to celebrate. Maybe your child gets a good grade at school; celebrate it. Perhaps your coworker gets a promotion; celebrate it. Did a staff member complete a difficult assignment with excellence? Celebrate it. If today is a friend's birthday, celebrate it.Celebrations don't have to cost a great deal of money—or any money at all. A celebration can be something as simple as complimentary words spoken, to a card or a note in the mail, to cake and cookies, to a full-blown party. There are so many creative ways to celebrate, and Jesus was always ready to do so because he knew the value of celebrations.
What made Jesus the world's greatest leader? In 2 Corinthians 3:18 we read we who have been born from above are being transformed into the likeness of Jesus with ever-increasing glory. Therefore, it makes sense for us to study his characteristics and pray those characteristics into our own lives.One outstanding quality I notice in Jesus is he knew what his mission was, he stayed focused, and he didn't try to jump through the expectation hoops of others. Do you remember when the disciples told him the whole town was waiting to hear him speak and Jesus said he had other plans for the day—his mission was to go to other towns. He didn't let anyone take him off his mission. One man asked him to settle an argument between him and his brother, and Jesus answered, ‘Who appointed me a judge or an arbiter between you?’ (Luke 12:14) That wasn't what he had come to do, and he didn't get sidetracked.We can apply this in so many ways in our everyday lives. How often do we allow ourselves to get sidetracked as we do our jobs, and we never seem to get things accomplished. One great time-management technique is to refuse to be sidetracked and stay with the job until it's done. Do you find that you're often sidetracked? That might be something you need to pray about and change.Then, Jesus knew what his mission was. Are you clear about your own mission—in your job, in your home, in your church, in your own life? Ask yourself, "What is it I need to do in my job above all else?" and then make certain that what you're doing on a day-to-day basis contributes to that mission. You may be very busy doing things that really don't matter!Do you find yourself frequently trying to please everyone? When you need to have everyone's approval, you will be easily distracted and easily manipulated. Jesus knew sometimes you have to disappoint people in order to stay on track and do what you should do.In Proverbs 16:7 we read,When the Lord takes pleasure in anyone’s way, he causes their enemies to make peace with them.When we please the Lord, we'll have our best shot at pleasing other people. However, we'll never be able to please everyone, and to try to do that is to invite disaster.
Jesus was the greatest leader this world has ever seen. This God-man came to earth and in three short years of ministry, he took twelve unqualified men and developed them into a team that has changed the course of history. I want to point out some specific characteristics that made Jesus a great leader, and hopefully this can help us see the kind of leaders we should be, whether in business or our homes or our churches.First, Jesus was a great leader because he knew who he reported to, and he made sure he fulfilled his boss's expectations. Jesus kept in close contact with his Father. He said again and again he always did what pleased his Father and spoke what the Father had taught him.In John 7:18 Jesus said,‘Whoever speaks on their own does so to gain personal glory, but he who seeks the glory of the one who sent him is a man of truth … ’When was the last time you checked with your boss to see if you're working to his or her satisfaction? Do you spend enough time with your boss to understand his or her priorities, so that you are doing the things that please your boss? It really is your job to make sure you've got the marching orders right. And besides, it is simply smart to take the initiative of letting your boss know you need and appreciate his or her feedback.Maybe you're thinking: You don't know my boss. It's impossible to communicate with my boss. That may or may not be true, but you should do everything you can to improve that communication. Many times, we excuse our own lack of effort by saying, "He never listens to me" or "I can't get any feedback from her," or "This company doesn't care what I think!" Pray about it and ask God to give you some creative ways to improve communication with your boss. That's the mark of a good worker and a good leader; certainly, Jesus was careful to stay in very close contact with the one who had sent him.In any business or organization, the ultimate boss is the customer. Your customer is the person who creates the need for your job. If they didn't exist or didn't have certain needs, your job would be unnecessary. Think about that, and clearly identify your own personal customers. Those are the people you need to please.
"Be still and know that I am God." What does it mean? How do we do it? At first, it seems like a very simple, straight-forward message: Be still and know that I am God. But I have discovered that it is not that easy to implement in my life, and I have a feeling many of you share that experience.First, it's not easy to simply be still, is it? We live in a world that seems to be in perpetual motion. All of us have more to do than we ever get done. It is not in vogue to "be still.” Successful people aren't viewed as people who are "still.” Rather, they are people who are active. We have this idea that if we're not doing something, we're not being productive.Those of us who are parents remember how often we would have given anything if our children would just be still! All that energy—constant movement! And when they're moving all the time, you can't communicate to them, they don't listen and you find it difficult to concentrate. How many times have you taken your child's shoulders, looked them in the eyes, and said, "Julie, please, be still!” You feel as though you cannot get anywhere with them until they simply stop.God, our Father, says the same thing to us. "Be still. Stop!” Stop walking, stop running, stop moving—just stop!” The first hurdle we face is to get our bodies to be still, to literally stop moving, and for most of us that does not come easy.I have learned that I must plan this "still" time in my day. It has to be designated, and I must give it the highest priority. For me, it has to be early in my day, before my mind is cluttered and my concentration is divided. And it's very helpful to me to have a certain place which I think of as my "still" place. That one spot in my home that is more or less reserved for my time with God.But I can get up early and get my body into that "still" place and discover that I'm still not "still.” Now the battle really begins for me. My mind starts going a mile a minute. If I allow myself to think about the schedule for the day, there is no stillness in that time. It's easy to lose my concentration on the purpose of this "still" time, and even though the body is in the right place, I'm not still before God.In order to be still before God, I have to have that inner focus which screens out all external thoughts and concerns, which centers on God and God alone, which brings me into that place where he is for that time my whole universe and no extraneous or conflicting information is allowed to interfere.I have sat for an hour or more in bodily stillness, but without inner stillness before God. How can I get to the place where I can be truly still before God, so that I am completely swallowed up with his presence and his reality, and nothing interferes with it? Frankly, I don't think it's easy for any of us, and I don't think it ever will be. Our three enemies, the world, the flesh and the devil, are all out to break up this quiet inner stillness, and a spiritual war wages when we sit down to be still before God.Here are some things that I have found helpful. First, I begin by praying for inner concentration, by claiming the blood of Christ as protection, by putting on the helmet of salvation to keep my mind from wandering.Singing can help me "be still" before the Lord, so at times I sing a hymn or chorus which focuses on God. Our pastor once suggested that you keep a pad and pencil nearby, and when your mind starts to wander, thinking of what you have to do, etc., just quickly make a note to remind yourself later on, and then you can go back to your meditation time. And then, simply be prepared to stay with it no matter how much your mind wanders. Each time it starts, quickly re-focus and start again if necessary.I find it takes time. I just can't dash in and out, like I do at the supermarket, get what I need and run. I cannot be still at the drop of a hat. Sometimes it takes what seems forever for me to be still on the inside.
Presented by Lauren StibgenHow we manage our time, the finances of our company, our relationships, and trials we experience are all ways we can show our faith at work. I would argue one of the most difficult tests of our faith comes when we are asked to do something that is questionable or become aware of someone else’s conduct that may be questionable. How we uphold our company’s code of ethics can show us as faithful stewards of the work God has placed before us.It is in these times Colossians 3:23 becomes even more important. Afterall, you are working for the Lord and not for man.Your colleague says, “Hey, I am running late, clock me in. If I am late again this week, I will lose my job.”“Let’s sell this old inventory on marketplace. They are throwing it out anyways.”Your colleague is drinking on the job and operating machinery.Your boss is secretly providing insider information to a competitor of the company about a new product.A coworker is using the petty cash to buy tickets for a sports event in town.You overhear a manager using derogatory language about someone of a different ethnicity.I was shocked to learn 75% of companies lose money each year from “buddy punching.” 20% of every dollar earned by U.S. companies is lost to employee time theft.The U.S. Department of Labor reported 65% of workplace job accidents are caused by drug and alcohol use.Intellectual property theft costs the U.S. up to $600 billion annually.Some of these issues seem less egregious than others, but how you respond can make all the difference as you consider God is watching your work.God doesn’t take kindly to dishonesty at work. Let’s recall Ananias and Sapphira in Acts 5. While they sold their land to give the proceeds to the early church, they lied about the profits. Both were struck dead on the spot.Beyond these statistics, the behaviors noted above are not only financially damaging to companies, but they make the workplace difficult.It can be tempting to help your coworker or to earn a few extra dollars when you think your company won’t miss a product. It can be hard to consider reporting a colleague for drinking on the job, and especially hard to report your superiors for misconduct. Making yourself aware of the expectations of your organization for reporting is one way to start. Most companies have an anonymous hotline you can call to report such incidents.If you find yourself amid any of these troubling circumstances, finding a trusted believer to pray with can help you discern the best steps to take. We are walking in a fallen world and cannot expect work to be easy, but surrounding yourself with community that supports your faith walk can make things a little easier.Maybe you are even questioning something you did at work; remember, God knows we aren’t perfect— this is why he sent Jesus. James 5:16 calls you to confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.
Presented by Lauren StibgenWe have all been there. You feel the fiery flames of the enemy sting at work. We all face trials at work, but how we handle them is another way we can reflect our faith through our work and express a Colossians 3:23 attitude.James 1:2-3 tells us to consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.When trials hit you at work, we may find joy very difficult, but how we handle the trial will also speak volumes to those we work with.No matter what position you hold for work, receiving constructive feedback about your performance, being the subject of gossip, or being passed for a promotion can be some of the most personally difficult things you go through.Maybe the trial isn’t about you personally, but you are carrying the burden of knowing your company might be considering layoffs or even a pay cut.Feelings well up. We feel anger, frustration, less than, anxious, eager to retaliate or gossip in return, disengaged in general. These are all natural but not how the Lord calls us to respond. In fact, God uses these trials to draw us closer to and more reliant upon him.In, Exodus 14:13-14, Moses answered the people, ‘Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today. The Egyptians you see today you will never see again. The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.’It takes time to process emotion during a trial. Those feelings, they want to spill out, but if we want to show our faith through our work, expressing our anger, frustration, anxiety, or harmful words don’t show our faith at all.What would happen if in the moment of difficult feedback, gossip, or disappointment, you chose to be silent and not react, to stand firm in your faith knowing the Lord will work for you? You don’t need to do anything in that moment, but remember the Lord fights our battles and walks with us in our trials.Taking this approach allows you to process a different response—a biblical and faithful one. After all, constructive feedback may be hard to hear but can help you grow. Not receiving that promotion may mean God has something better ahead. Flying above the gossip targeted at you and remembering what a reward you have in Christ can refresh your attitude. God even calls us to repay our enemies with kindness!I have personally experienced everything I spoke of here today. Yet, holding fast to the Word has helped me learn not to react but to lean on the Lord.
Presented by Lauren StibgenAs we continue to explore how we show our faith through our work, thinking about our relationships with our colleagues, superiors, subordinates, and clients is key. Remember, we are thinking about Colossians 3:23, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord…So, what does God have to say about our relationships? Well, if you study the bible, you know he says a lot! However, if we are to take a wide lens view of what the word says about our relationships, it is summed up well in the greatest command. While this command is found throughout the gospels, Luke 10:27 says we need to love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind; and love your neighbor as yourself.Love your neighbor as yourself. Those that we encounter at work today are our neighbors. How can we show them love?We have already covered one way to show love to others and that is through our time. Let’s take this one step further and think about being present. Mary recently talked to us about the ministry of presence. Truly being in the moment and present for someone is a way to show our faith and love for God. When you meet with someone, think about leaving your phone behind or silencing notifications. How is your eye contact? Are you actively listening to what they are saying?Think about how you connect with others at work. Are your connections authentic or surface? How are you getting to know more about them, beyond their position in your workplace? Knowing more about their favorite past times and even their family time can help build authentic community at work. Maybe you can ask about a child’s birthday, an important sporting event or buy them a gift card to their favorite restaurant for a special occasion. You won’t know if you don’t take the time to connect.Being in a leadership role makes your relationships even more important. As part of my role as a leader in our organization, I am responsible for reviewing team performance and ensuring goals are set for the upcoming year. With a few new team members this year, I was surprised to learn two of them had never had managers who asked about their goals. In fact, one told me her goals were always the goals of her manager. Now, while part of this is true of any position, it was clear no one had shown an interest in her talents, strengths, and goals. Simply asking the question made her feel valued.Most importantly, spread the love! Don’t silo yourself to your team. Building cross-departmental relationships is both good for you and for your organization! Be the builder!
Presented by Lauren StibgenI am sure you have heard the phrase, dollars and cents add up! As we look at showing our faith through our work, I want to remind us of Colossians 3:23, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord.Luke 16:10 states, whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much, and whoever is dishonest with very little will also be dishonest with much.How you steward the financial resources entrusted to you at work can be one way to show your faith at work. You don’t need to be managing a budget or working in accounting to impact your company’s financial wellbeing. We don’t often stop and think of the implications of small actions or seemingly unrelated things that truly add up for our company. How are you faithful in the small things?First, let’s consider the ways we interact with the financial resources of work.Maybe you are in a support capacity for your office. Let’s think of something as simple as sending a package in advance of a meeting. While sometimes you may not be in complete control of all the materials, sending this package a week ahead versus a day ahead will mean lower shipping costs for your company. I have personally seen the difference in shipping be greater than $50! Maybe you are only rushing a package once, but what if this becomes a weekly occurrence? If we just consider the $50, this will equal an added $2,600 annually for your company. Again, $2,600 may sound small, but what if everyone on your team was managing this way? You can imagine the math could add up well into the six figures depending on the size of your organization.Are you in a customer facing position? Whether you are in customer service or sales, the relationships you have with your clients have financial implications for your organization. Being responsive and solving the customer’s concerns can both retain sales for your company or even add sales. What are the implications of having a poor client relationship? Lost sales?Maybe you are fulfilling orders in a warehouse. Getting the orders fulfilled on time and with accuracy matters. Impact on shipping costs or having to replace an order because it was incorrect all add costs for your organization.Maybe my examples seem small, but reflect on Luke 16 again, he who is faithful in very little…. Don’t discount the little things you can do to be a good financial steward for your company. Whether it is time, relationships, or accuracy, your faithful actions can truly add up and make a difference!
Presented by Lauren StibgenFaith can feel very personal, especially when it comes to thinking about faith at work. Maybe like I used to you are overthinking the concept of faith at work. What we will talk about this week isn’t about starting a bible study, quoting scripture, or offering to pray for a colleague. It is a little different. I consider it faith at work 2.0!Colossians 3:23 implores us to work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord…Let’s look at different ways to show your faith through your work rooted in Colossians 3:23.First, let’s consider time.What do you do when the boss isn’t around? Are you a remote worker or even hybrid? According to a recent McKinsey report, 5% of remote workers are working two full time jobs! While I am sure there are talented people out there, as a leader, I would not want to get ½ of someone I think I am employing full time.Have you stopped to think about how you spend your work time? Perhaps you aren’t in this 5%. But whether you work remotely or head into an office, the reality is how you spend the time your employer expects you to be working matters. From signing in to work or showing up for a meeting on time, to being focused on your work during the day, you can show your faith by being a good steward of your time.Ephesians 5:15-16 tells us to be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil.Perhaps it isn’t being on time that is your issue, but the temptations of social media, a long lunch, or online shopping that take you away from your work. Are you prone to gossip or make personal calls during your day?Being consistent and faithful with your time shows respect both for your employer and for your colleagues. I am sure like me, you have sat looking at yourself on zoom, waiting for someone to join, or maybe you have a colleague or boss that is always late. How does that feel? Maybe there is someone who scrolls through their phone during a meeting or misses a question because they are distracted. While there are sometimes good reasons for being a few minutes behind or being distracted, be aware so this doesn’t become a pattern in how you spend your time at work.God has entrusted you with the time you spend at work. How you spend this time is a direct reflection of how you take Colossians 3:23 to heart and live out your faith through your work.
It’s true what Jesus told us. We cannot serve God and Money, spelled with a capital "M", because he recognized the power of money. He knows how easily we can be fooled into thinking money is the answer to all our problems. Fran finds herself in this mental trap.At work this day the money worries are heavy on her mind, and she really doesn't want to listen to Jesus. She's into self-pity and sometimes it's hard for Fran to leave her pity party behind.As she sits at her desk worrying and feeling sorry for herself, her phone rings. "Mrs. Langley," the voice says."Yes," Fran replies."Mrs. Langley, I'm calling for Dr. Carrow. I was just calling about the bill for Alice's dental work. It's past due and we were wondering when you might be able to pay it?"Fran is stunned as she realizes what this is—a collection call. "Uh," she mutters, very embarrassed, "well, I know it's a little late, but I'll try to pay right away. I'm sorry, it's just that so many bills have come due this month. I’m sorry.""Are you saying then that you'll get a check off to us soon? When can we expect it, Mrs. Langley?" the cold voice asks on the other end of the phone. Fran can't believe how pushy he is."Uh, well," Fran tries to think, "I'll try to get a check off this week.""Then we can expect full payment this week, is that right Mrs. Langley?” he continues.Fran is starting to get irritated. "I'll do the best I can.""Well," the voice continues, "I'm sure you realize this is already 60 days late, so we'll expect your check in the next few days.""You know," Fran replies, "you shouldn't be calling me here at work. Don't call me here anymore please.""Well, Mrs. Langley, if you pay your bills on time, we won't have to call you again at all," he says with emphasis."I don't believe that guy," Fran says as she slams the phone down. She has never been so humiliated in her life. The rest of the day is pretty much a wipe-out. Fran can't think of anything else, and she gets angrier and angrier.Several times during the day, Jesus tries to get her attention, but Fran chooses to ignore him. She knows what he'll say: Fran, you're feeling sorry for yourself. Fran, you're letting your imagination run away with you. Fran, I'll take care of you. She doesn't want to hear it.Fran stops at the station to fill her car on the way home. Johnny says to her, "Mrs. Langley, do you realize your tires are real thin? Those two on the back, well there's hardly any tread left. You oughta get some new tires soon, I think."Fran looks at Johnny and then at the tires. How dare he suggest that she needs to buy new tires—today of all days. She's so upset she can't even respond to him; abruptly she pays for the gas and drives off.As she arrives home, Drew rushes up to her. "Mom, what happened? We can't get the kids channels anymore?""Oh, Drew, I canceled the cable service today," Fran replies."You canceled cable? But why?" Drew demands to know."Because we can't afford it, that's why," Fran replies with a raised volume in her voice."What do you mean we can't afford it? We've always afforded it before," Drew asks."Drew, we don't have money like we did before your father died. You kids have to realize that," Fran replies."Oh, we realize it all the time. That's all you talk about," Drew throws back at her with anger."Now, listen to me son," Fran grabs him by the shoulders, "I'm doing the best I can. I have to cut our costs, and we can do without cable television, that's all there is to it. Furthermore, we're probably going to have to sell the house and move to a cheaper place.”As soon as she says it, she knows she said the wrong thing. "Move to another house? Mom, we can't leave this house. Mom..." Drew looks at her with fear in his eyes, and tears start to roll down his cheeks. Fran is ashamed of how she has upset him unnecessarily. This was no way to tell him this bad news.
Fran has just learned from her manager, Ben, she may be laid off. Driving home that evening, Fran says to Jesus, “That was pretty incredible what Ben said to me today, Lord. He wants to keep me!”“And it looks like he wants to ask some questions and I know I have to be ready to give answers for the hope that is within me,” Fran smiles as she pulls in her driveway.After her evening with the kids and putting them to bed, she sits quietly and talks to Jesus: “You know, I really worry about John. If he gets laid off instead of me, it could be devastating for him. And with all his expenses now—he's got it worse than me, Lord. Should I suggest to Ben that he keep him and not me?” Fran needs some wisdom, and she has learned to ask for it when she needs it, because the Bible promises to give us wisdom if we ask for it.That still small voice impresses on her it would be better to let this work itself out and just keep her hands off. As long as she’s willing to accept it either way and she knows the Lord will take care of her either way, she’s in a win-win situation. However, her concern for John continues, and she prays for him.“And Louise, too, Lord. If I stay and she goes, that would be hard for her and me, too,” Fran reminds Jesus. But, of course, he never forgot.Did Fran lose her job? No. The next day Ben told her he had decided to fight the decision to lay off five people and convinced them to cut that to four. So, Fran stayed and so did John. But Louise was laid off.But, you see, for Fran the outcome was decided when she gave the situation over to the Lord and looked to him for her support and trusted him to take care of her. Once she did that—and continued to do that—she was in a win-win situation. Regardless of the circumstances, her peace remained.Obviously, Fran is very thankful. She is, however, very concerned about Louise and has been spending lots of time with her in the evenings, encouraging her and praying with her.She did have lunch with Ben, and they talked about what it means to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. It's all new to Ben and he finds it a little scary. But Fran is sowing seeds and praying they will take root in good soil in his heart.Whatever circumstances you're facing today, remember with Jesus at your side, you have a resource of strength and wisdom that will not fail you. Be sure you practice his presence in your everyday life. Just like Fran, you need to realize Jesus is there beside you all the time.
Fran has just learned there is likely to be a large lay-off in her company, and Ben, her manager has asked to meet with her at 3 o'clock. She returns to her office after lunch and completes her project, with unexplainable peace which only Jesus can give.Time passes quickly and Fran looks at her watch. “Wow, it's three o'clock. I need your presence with me through this, Lord.” And she heads down the hall.Ben shuts the door behind Fran as she sits down. “Well, you've probably been hearing some rumors today, Fran. Let me try to tell you what's happening. It's been very sudden, but as you've probably heard, we lost two huge accounts.”“Yeah, that's what I heard,” Fran responds. “And I heard that a bunch of us would have to be laid off.”“Well,” Ben nods her head, “unfortunately, that's the case. They are telling me I have to let five of my fifteen account reps go. And the rules are that the newest employees go first. I've been looking at the records, Fran, and you're number five.”“So, that means I'm out of here I guess,” Fran looks at Ben.“Well, I don't know for sure yet,” Ben responds. “You see, John, who is number six, has been here only six months longer than you, and he has had an unsatisfactory performance rating for almost a year now. I'm hoping I can let John go and keep you. You're one of my best performers; I respect you and I want to keep you if I can.”Fran smiles at Ben. “Well, I appreciate those words of confidence more than I can say. That means a lot to me, regardless of what happens. And I feel sorry for John.”“Well, I do, too. He's been going through a nasty divorce, and it has affected his work. I've tried to hang in there with him, but it just drags on and his performance gets worse. At any rate, I have to do what's right for the company,” Ben shares with Fran.“Wow, Ben, you're in a tough spot. I don't envy you,” Fran says. “You know, I need a job, too; I have two kids to support. But if you decide to keep John, it'll be okay because it might be harder for him to find a job than me, and with this divorce, he might break under it,” Fran explains.“I have to tell you the truth, Fran, if I didn't know you as well as I do, I wouldn't believe you could be so calm and say what you did. I never thought I’d like you ‘Jesus freaks,’ but you're different. Someday let's talk about it more,” Ben suggests.“Love to, Ben. I guess I am a ‘Jesus freak,’ as you put it, and I'd love to tell you why. Let's have lunch soon,” Fran replies with a smile.“Okay, soon as I get this terrible ordeal over with. Well, there's not much more I can tell you now. I'm meeting with Human Resources people tonight, so maybe I'll have an answer for you tomorrow.”Fran gets up to leave. “Oh, by the way, how about Louise?”“I'm afraid she'll have to go, too. She's number 3,” Ben advises Fran.
We follow the on-going story of Fran and Jesus on the job. Fran has just learned there’s a good possibility she may be laid off. Jesus has comforted her with the knowledge he will never leave her and will take care of her, so she managed to have a productive morning.Lunch time rolls around, and Louise sticks her head in Fran’s office. “Hey, it’s time for lunch; let’s go.”“Okay, I’ll meet you in the cafeteria in five minutes,” Fran answers. Just as she’s starting to leave for lunch, Ben, her manager, walks into her office.“Fran, we need to find some time to talk this afternoon. How about 3 o'clock?” Ben asks in a rather subdued manner.Fran can feel her heart beating faster. “Fine, Ben. What's up?”“Oh, I'll give you all the details later,” he replies.“Sure, okay—see you at three, Ben.” Fran begins to pray as he leaves. “Well, Lord, looks like Louise was right. This will probably be it—the big news.”As she feels the anxiety begin to rise, she can hear Jesus saying she should not borrow trouble from tomorrow. Tomorrow has enough trouble of its own.“Okay, Lord, I'll just wait and see what he says. Now, I better go meet Louise.”As they settle down at a secluded table, Louise starts in right away. “So, have you heard anything else, Fran?”“Well, I haven't talked with anyone else, but Ben did ask me to see him this afternoon at three, and he seemed kinda somber,” Fran reports to Louise.“See—see what I told you. I bet you anything, he'll drop the shoe on you then. He'll probably see me today, too,” Louise laments, while picking at her food. “If I lose my job, what will I do?” She puts her head in her hands.“Louise, I went through a panic attack after you left my office this morning, but I remembered a verse I read in Psalm 56 just this morning. It says whenever we are afraid, we must trust in the Lord, and it asks, 'What can mortal man do to me?' All this company can do to you is let you go. That's all, Louise, and that's not the end of the world. Jesus has promised to take care of you.”“I knew you would say something like that, Fran, but I'm sorry. I just can't dismiss it so easily.” Louise turns her head so Fran can't see the tears.“Louise, I'm not dismissing it. But Jesus is totally trustworthy, and I'm just going to keep trusting him to take care of me and my kids. He'll take care of you, too. You belong to him.”Fran's words seem to have little effect on Louise. “Lord,” Fran says quietly to Jesus, “She's not listening to me. She needs to hear it from you, I think.”Fran turns to Louise, “You know, Louise, why don't you take the rest of the lunch hour and go out to your car to get alone and just spend some time in prayer. Did you bring your Bible today? You can borrow mine. I think that will help you a great deal.” Fran puts her arm around Louise.“Okay, Fran. I think you're right. I've got my Bible in my desk. I'll see you later,” Louise says as she walks off with her tray, her food untouched.Not an easy day for Fran or Louise, but with Jesus there, they'll get through it.
Fran faces a troubling predicament—she may be laid off from her job. As she talked about it with Jesus, he assured her nothing could separate her from him, so she could trust him.Of course, the nagging fears keep nibbling around her mind, but Jesus speaks to her again in that inner voice, reminding her he always keeps his promises. Fran begins to think about that.“That’s right, Lord, and you’ve promised never to leave me or forsake me. And you’ve promised to supply all of my needs according to your riches,” Fran says.“It’s really a question of whether or not I think you have the riches and resources to meet my needs and those of my children, even if I lose my job, isn’t it, Lord?”Fran thinks this through very carefully. Trite answers won’t do here. “Yes, I believe you can meet my needs,” she responds, a little shaky.She can hear that inner voice saying to her: “Well, believing I can meet your needs is one thing; but do you believe I will meet your needs, Fran?” As she thinks about this question, Fran realizes this is a real test of her faith, because faith is believing what you can’t see.It’s not too hard to say you believe God can take care of you, but when you’re facing possible financial hardships, lack of income, or loss of a job, it causes you to search your heart and see who you trust. Fran asks herself: “Do you trust your employer more than Jesus?”“Oh, no, Lord, of course not. I trust you more than anyone. You know that,” Fran quickly asserts. “So that means there is no need to panic. I can relax. The company does not hold my future in their hands; you do, Lord.”As this thought fills her mind, the tears start down her face. “It’s so easy to forget that, Lord. Thanks for reminding me. You’re a whole lot more reliable than any company I could ever work for, and I can trust you with my future. But I have a feeling you’re going to have to remind me of that quite often as this all starts to play out. I’m sure the fear and panic will raise its ugly head again.”Thinking about that, Fran decides it would be a good idea to type those two verses from Psalm 56 on a card and prop it up right there on her desk, even on her screensaver, so she can see it all the time. “That will help me remember that when I am afraid, you are here for me and no earthly person or organization can get to me except through you. Lord,” she continues, “I am your responsibility, and you are capable of taking care of me quite well.”“I will keep trusting you, Lord,” Fran replies. “I’m okay now; I’m fine. I better get to work. Got lots to do today.” And with that, Fran's mind is at rest, and she begins her day’s work.
I examine the story of Fran and Jesus on the Job. For those who’ve been following for a while, you know that we’ve been following the life of a fictitious woman named Fran, who works as an account representative for an advertising agency. I tell this story to help us learn to practice the reality of Jesus’ presence in our everyday lives. He is with us when we are born from above; we just often forget he’s there.Walking into her office today, Fran says to Jesus, “You know, Lord, things have been going really well lately. I sure appreciate your patience with me and your goodness to me.”As Fran settles into her office, Louise, a coworker who is also a believer, rushes in and shuts the door. “Fran, sit down. You’re not going to believe what I just heard. We just lost two key accounts, our largest. That’s about 30% of this company’s business, Fran. Do you realize what that means?”Fran sits down; she does indeed realize what it means. “You're kidding, Louise. We lost both those accounts? Why?”“Money. Simpson and Elliott came in with incredibly low bids, and the clients went for it. Fran, there will be some drastic cuts around here, you can be sure of that. And you know who gets cut first—those of us who’ve been here the shortest. That’s me and you. Fran, we could be out of a job in a week.”Louise’s words hit Fran like a ton of bricks. “They wouldn’t do that. We have good records; we bring in business; we do our jobs well."“Don’t kid yourself,” Louise replies. “When it comes to laying off people, it’s first in, first out, regardless of your contribution to the company. I gotta go to a meeting; let’s have lunch and talk more.”“Yeah, sure,” Fran replies as Louise rushes out of her office.“Lord, did you hear that? If Louise is right, I’d have to collect unemployment, but unemployment won’t pay all my bills. Plus, I have very little money put back. I mean with two kids to feed and clothe, it just takes a lot. And jobs are hard to find; Lord, what am I going to do?” Fran feels panic starting to rise.Then Jesus brings to her mind the Psalm she read just this morning before leaving for work. As she reaches for her Bible, she says, “What Psalm was that? Here it is—Psalm 56. Verses 3 and 4 say When I am afraid, I put my trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I will not be afraid. What can mortal man do to me? Well, quite honestly, Lord, right now it feels like mortal man—my employer—has the power to do something pretty dreadful to me—take my job away.”But the quiet inner voice of God’s Spirit reminds her again if that happens, nothing can separate her from the love of God.“No, of course not,” Fran says. And Fran is reassured by Jesus’ gentle words.
After Fran gets the kids in bed this Tuesday evening, she says to herself, "It's the first of the month. I've got to pay bills tonight."One of the toughest aspects of being single for Fran is the total responsibility of the finances, which now rests on her shoulders. Since the death of her husband, Jim, that job has become Fran's, and she doesn't enjoy it at all. Of course, it's particularly difficult because there's hardly ever enough money to pay all the bills. She and Jim moved into their home three years before he died, but the mortgage payment is pretty steep for Fran's salary.As she looks at her bank account, Fran says to herself, "Well, what bills will I pull out of the hat this month? Good grief that phone bill is ridiculous. And this dentist bill for Alice. All she had was a small cavity; you'd think she had a tooth implant—and my insurance doesn’t cover dental," Fran fumes, as she continues to calculate the bottom line."Oh great," she exclaims, "I'm $200 short this month. If the kids just didn't have to eat, I guess we could get by!"As soon as she says that she can hear Jesus saying to her, "I've promised to take care of you. You will not be brought to shame or go hungry or miss anything you need."Fran had momentarily forgotten that Jesus is always there, but she finds herself a bit annoyed. "Yeah, but I still have to pay these bills!"She tries to calm herself down a bit and think more rationally. Jesus quietly says to her, "Well, Fran, take a look at your bills. Which ones can be eliminated or reduced?""Well, this cable TV bill—I guess that could be eliminated. The kids enjoy some of the kids programs and the cartoons," Fran rationalizes, “but they have a lot of good videos, and mom has bought them several Bible videos recently. It's just easy for me to plop them down in front of the television when I'm tired or busy," Fran candidly admits. "But I'll cancel the cable tomorrow."Looking through the rest of the bills, she says, "There's really not much else here I can do away with. This VISA bill is too high. I bought that new dress last month, but I need to have nice clothes to work in.” Fran feels defensive."But you do need to find ways to reduce your expenses,” Jesus reminds her."Well, I know I could sell the house and live somewhere cheaper, but...” That's the one thing Fran doesn't want to think about. She loves her home, and she's been hanging on by her fingernails to keep it. "Every woman wants her own home, and the children are comfortable here. It's home to them," Fran says. "I don't think it would be wise to change schools."“Fran,” Jesus says to her, "don’t you think it's time for you to seek some good counsel?” She remembers Proverbs 20:18: “Make plans by seeking advice; if you wage war, obtain guidance.” She says, “Well, I do need to wage war against these financial woes. They're causing me a great deal of stress and it's getting worse, not better. So, I’ll seek some counsel."As she finishes paying bills, the thought of selling her house begins to depress her. She feels anger start to rise up just thinking about it."It's just not fair," she thinks, as tears start down her cheeks. Looking at her wedding picture on the desk beside her, she remembers life with Jim. "It's just not fair. Why did Jim die? Why did God take him from me? It's just not fair!"Fran puts her head down on the desk, and the sobs shake her body, as the pain and loneliness flood her memory. Suddenly she sits up and says out loud, "Lord, it's just not fair. I didn't do anything to deserve this. I was doing what you wanted me to do, and so was Jim," she says as all her anger pours out."I understand," she can hear that quiet voice of the Lord whispering to her."How could you understand? You've never had to raise two kids by yourself.” The words come out of her mouth before Fran can stop them.Then she remembers how Jesus was rejected by his closest friends.
What would amaze Jesus Christ? Well, there are two occasions where we’re told Jesus was amazed. Earlier we saw how Jesus was amazed at the faith of the Roman Centurion who asked him to heal his servant. He had great faith in Jesus even though he had little teaching or knowledge of our Lord.In Mark 6 we see where Jesus was again amazed, but for different reasons.Jesus left there and went to his hometown, accompanied by his disciples. When the Sabbath came, he began to teach in the synagogue, and many who heard him were amazed. ‘Where did this man get these things?’ they asked. ‘What’s this wisdom that has been given him? What are these remarkable miracles he is performing? Isn’t this the carpenter? Isn’t this Mary’s son and the brother of James, Joseph, Judas and Simon? Aren’t his sisters here with us?’ And they took offense at him. Jesus said to them, ‘A prophet is not without honor except in his own town, among his relatives and in his own home.’ He could not do any miracles there, except lay his hands on a few sick people and heal them. He was amazed at their lack of faith (Mark 6:1-6).Just think of what they missed because they didn’t believe in Jesus. He wanted to do good things for them, but he couldn’t because of their lack of faith. Mark writes he could not do any miracles there. Their lack of faith made it impossible for Jesus to do miracles in their town.I wonder today if Jesus is amazed at my faith and at yours? Is he amazed I have faith in him, regardless of the circumstances, regardless of the prospects, even without complete understanding? Do I amaze him with my consistent faith in him and what he can do? Or rather, is he amazed to see that in spite of all I know and all the experience I've had, my faith is still weak and anemic?How about you? Is Jesus amazed at your strong faith or at your lack of faith?A.W. Tozer said, “True faith rests upon the character of God and asks no further proof than the moral perfections of the One who cannot lie. Faith is not meritorious; it is simply confidence in the goodness of God, and the lack of it is a reflection upon God’s holy character.”Having faith in God is not a great virtue for us. It simply says we’ve got enough good sense to trust the God of the universe.
There were two occasions in Scripture where we’re told Jesus was amazed. Do you know what they are? It may amaze you to see what amazed Jesus.The first occasion is recorded in Luke 7, which is the story of the Roman Centurion who asked Jesus to heal his sick servant. Roman soldiers were characteristically hard, tough men, with little compassion or concern for others, certainly not for servants. We would expect this man to be ruthless and uncaring. So, we cannot help but be impressed that he would care about a servant, and that he would be willing to come to Jesus on his behalf.In addition to this, we see in verse 5 that he had been very generous with the Jewish people who were under his command and had built them a synagogue, though he was not himself a Jew. This was indeed an unusual man.What is really amazing is his profound comprehension of who Jesus is. We’re told as Jesus was going to his home to heal his servant, the soldier sent friends to say to him, “Lord, don't trouble yourself, for I do not deserve to have you come under my roof. That is why I did not even consider myself worthy to come to you. But say the word, and my servant will be healed.Here was a Roman soldier who somehow knew the power and authority Jesus had. In addition, he was a truly humble man, feeling unworthy for Jesus to even enter his home. He showed great faith in Jesus, believing he could heal his servant by just speaking a word, without even seeing the servant.And when Jesus heard this, we’re told he was amazed at him. In fact, Jesus said, “I tell you, I have not found such great faith, even in Israel.” Jesus was amazed at his faith.He was amazed at the depth of his faith, and at his persistence in seeking Jesus. I’m sure Jesus was also amazed this Roman Centurion would believe in him in spite of the social or political consequences it might cause. Surely it was not considered smart for a man in his position to believe in this itinerant, controversial Jewish preacher. Yet he unashamedly goes to Jesus for help.He had amazing faith. I would like to have that kind of faith—the kind that amazes Jesus, wouldn't you? Next we’ll see the other occasion where we're told Jesus was amazed.
I want to examine fair-weather faith. I see an awful lot all around me and I see far too much in my own life at times. Fair-weather faith is the kind that is strong when things are going well, but when bad times hit, it falls apart.Let me share some verses with you, which illustrate the kind of faith we should have. First, a few verses from the Psalms:The Lord has done great things for us, and we are filled with joy (Psalm 126:3).What shall I return to the Lord for all his goodness to me (Psalm 116:12)?Praise be to the Lord, for he has heard my cry for mercy. The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy and with my song I praise him (Psalm 28:6-7).And in contrast:Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Savior (Habakkuk 3:17-18).Here we see two types of praise: one when things are good and wonderful, and one when nothing good is happening. You know, it's easy to have fair-weather faith, to praise God when everything’s going our way, when we’re feeling good about our circumstances, when we’ve had a wonderful answer to prayer. But what about those off-days, those down times, those dry spells?A mature Christian is one who praises even when nothing good is happening and there’s no silver lining, no light at the end of the tunnel. Habakkuk said even though things are just awful, yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Savior. It's that set of our will that makes the difference. We make a choice to praise God and rejoice in him, regardless.Where are you today? Good times in your life? Nice circumstances? If so, praise God and promise him that when the hard times hit, you’ll praise him then, too.Maybe it’s not so good for you right now. Tough days, heartaches, failures, disappointments? Praise him anyway. Say “Lord, everything’s going wrong right now. But I will rejoice in you anyway.” When God sees that kind of faith and that set of your will, he is pleased for he knows that your commitment and love for him are steadfast. Your faith is not the fair-weather type. May that be true of each of us.
Do you ever go to God for help in a faithless panic? I certainly can remember doing that at times when I've been at the end of my own rope, and in panic rather than in faith, I've run to God for help.Recently I was comparing two stories in Matthew 8. The first is the story of the Centurion who asked Jesus to heal his servant. You remember the Centurion insisted Jesus could heal his servant simply by speaking a word; he didn't even need to come to his house. The Centurion had faith to believe Jesus had the power to simply speak healing to his servant who was miles away. When Jesus heard this, he said, “I have not found anyone in Israel with such great faith.”You see, this Centurion was not an Israelite, yet he believed in Jesus. And Jesus commends him for his faith, and heals his servant as requested.A short time later, the disciples come to Jesus in a panic. Jesus was asleep in the boat, and a squall comes up quickly, which threatens to overturn the boat and drown them all. They come in great fear, begging Jesus to do something if he can. And Jesus says to them “You of little faith. Why are you so afraid?”Interestingly, the Centurion was commended for his faith, and the disciples were confronted for their lack of faith. Both needed help. Both sought help from Jesus. Jesus responded to both requests. But one was a request of faith and one was a faithless cry of panic.The Centurion expected Jesus to heal his servant—long distance. The disciples were amazed Jesus could calm the storm. The Centurion only knew Jesus from afar by reputation. The disciples had spent much time with him. Yet, the Centurion showed great faith. He came with his need, but he brought expectation along with the need. The disciples came with their need, but they thought this storm was too much for Jesus. They really didn't expect him to do what he did.How about you and me? Jesus invites us to come with our needs, but he loves to see faith along with it. The next time you’re in a panic situation and you need Jesus’ deliverance, come with faith believing he will hear and answer. He loves to see us come to him by faith. It pleases him to see we have faith in him. In fact, without faith, it’s impossible to please him.
You don't have to read much in the New Testament to realize faith is a vital part of our relationship with Jesus Christ. How do we have more faith? That certainly is a key question for all of us who desire to please God, since it's impossible to do so without faith.We read in Matthew 13:58 that Jesus did not do many miracles in his hometown because of their lack of faith. As I was reading that chapter, I thought, why didn't Jesus perform miracles so they would have faith in him? The miracles would have produced faith. But then I remembered the many times he refused to do miracles so that people might have faith in him.Faith is not produced by miracles; miracles are a result of faith. Jesus never jumps through hoops to try to convince us to have faith in him. After all, Jesus doesn’t need our validation of who he is, and it is sinful arrogance to think God must prove himself to us. We must come to God by faith if we come at all, and faith is the evidence of things hoped for, it is being certain of what we do not see. Therefore, miracles don’t produce faith. They strengthen our faith, but the faith must come before the miracles.As a matter of fact, I think if Jesus had tried to produce faith through miracles, he never could have done enough. He would have to come up with bigger and better miracles all the time, because we would want more.Have you been asking for a miracle? No question God loves to respond to our need, but before you ask for that miracle, ask God to increase your faith. God is looking for faith; in fact, without faith it’s impossible to please God. And the Bible tells us faith comes from hearing, and hearing through the word of Christ (Romans 10:17). Your faith grows from spending time in God’s Word. That's where faith finds its birth. Then, as your faith is strengthened, you can pray in faith for the miracle you need.
Presented by Lauren StibgenUnless you work for a Christian company, and, let’s be honest, even if you do, it is important to remember that we live in a fallen world. The characteristics of a fallen world are all around us, and we all sin and fall short. Even as believers, we will still sin. The difference we have is Jesus.While there are many Scriptures that outline the differences between a worldly walk and a Christian walk, Romans 12 provides one of my go-to lists when I am thinking about the fallen world versus the perfect, new, flawless world we are promised as believers—heaven. Although we will not have heaven on earth right now, how we show people a glimpse of Jesus and this perfect world should be our focus for living out our faith through our work. In Romans 12:1-2, Paul is clear in his appeal, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. And to not conform to the pattern of this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.So, what does this world look like at work? In the verses following in Romans 12, Paul provides us a “do this, not that” list.First and foremost, do not think of yourself more highly than you ought (Romans 12:3). Simply, be humble. The opposite of humility is pride, and I think we can all think of a time when we were prideful. Of course, it is easier to see this in others, but let’s think of how we can display humility. Maybe you are leading a project. The team is finding great success, and someone provides you with an opportunity to present your project to the leadership team. Pride says, I, I, I. Humility says, we did this together. Can I bring the team with me to the meeting?Let love be genuine (Romans 12:9). When I think of this, I automatically think of checking my motives. Why am I asking questions, complimenting someone, or giving them a small token of appreciation? I know this may sound strange, but sometimes we are prone to show “love” so that we can experience gain. Make sure you can answer for yourself that your compliments are genuine, and your gifts whether physical or of your time are given without the expectation of seeking something in return.Don’t be slothful in zeal. Serve the Lord (Romans 12:11). Colossians 3:23, tells us that we work as to the Lord and not for man. Showing up to work with the Lord on your heart and working for him is a good reason to have zeal. Zeal is defined as showing great energy or enthusiasm in pursuit of a cause or objective. Maybe you really don’t love your job right now. Change your thinking. Be full of zeal as a service to the Lord! Instead of grumbling, think about how different someone will experience you today if you show up with zeal! Maybe this is your opportunity to move to faith at work 2.0! You can let them know who you work for! The Lord!Bless those who persecute you (Romans 12:14). Live peaceably and do not avenge yourself. This must be one of the most difficult things to do. C. H. Spurgeon uses a great word for this—calumny. A simple definition of this is slander, but overall, it refers to words that damage your reputation. In this instance, words spoken at work. It is way easier to put a zealous skip in your step than it is to do as Paul says and to live peaceably and not avenge yourself. Throughout Scripture we are told that the Lord will avenge us. In Romans 12:19, Paul reminds us, Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: ‘It is mine to avenge; I will repay.’ He goes on to tell us the contrary way to handle this. Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good (Romans 12:21).I have found that the more I fight to avenge my good name, the more strife it stirs in the workplace. When someone chooses to speak poorly about you, it may be hard to outwardly bless them, but perhaps you pray for them or pray for God to care for your situation specifically.
Presented by Lisa BishopMost of us recognize the importance of developing patience, we’re just not in a hurry to grow in it; and patience has been said to be a test of our Christian authenticity and character.One example of patience is the story of Joseph told in Genesis 37-50. I encourage you to read the story on your own but here’s the gist. Joseph was a favored son of Jacob, betrayed by his brothers and sold into slavery in Egypt. In Egypt he finds favor with one of Pharaoh’s officials, Potiphar, and is given charge of Potiphar’s household. Potiphar’s wife unjustly accuses Joseph of trying to sleep with her and as a result he is thrown into prison. After years in prison, Joseph interprets Pharaoh’s dreams, and is finally freed and put in charge of the whole land of Egypt. Then a famine strikes and Joseph’s brothers, who did not recognize him, come to ask him for food. Joseph provides for them and eventually reveals his identity. His brothers are afraid expecting him to seek revenge. But Joseph responds patiently:Don’t be afraid. Am I in the place of God? You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives. So then, don’t be afraid. I will provide for you and your children (Genesis 50:19-21).Joseph’s faith in God gave him the patience to persevere from pit to prison and ultimately being elevated to the palace.His story shows that patience begins with knowing God is sovereign and in control. When you find yourself enduring hardships, setbacks, betrayal or uncertainties, this is the time to trust and lean into God.I will be the first to say it’s not easy, especially when suffering is involved. But you must have the patience and perseverance to know God will work all things out—most likely not in your timing or liking, but according to his love and sovereignty. And God will use the time to produce something in you as you cling to him.Patience is learning to accept the things we cannot change as we lay them down at the foot of the cross, placing our trust in our heavenly father.In difficult seasons, I want to encourage you to surrender to God’s timing and embrace waiting as a time of growth. Allow God to shape your character and deepen your faith during these times. And remember the words of Proverbs 3:5-6.Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.\
Presented by Lisa BishopMost people will admit patience is not their greatest strength, but it is a fruit of the spirit, and as a follower of Jesus, you and I are to grow in being patient. Take a moment to reflect on the impact your lack of patience has had on your relationships and life. We can all identify moments we wish we could rewind the clock and get a do-over on patience.The other day I was reading through the gospel of Matthew and came to chapter 18 verse 7 when Jesus said, woe to the world for temptations to sin! For it is necessary that temptations come…It is necessary that temptations come.What does that verse have to do with patience? If you think about it, impatience can be the impetus for very poor choices. When you lack patience, you can be tempted to take matters into your own hands, go your own way, and not trust God’s way.How has temptation tested your patience and caused you to give in? Maybe you have been longing for marriage and are tired of waiting so you are tempted to be in a relationship with someone who is not following Jesus. Or, perhaps you have been waiting on a job promotion and you are tempted to fudge numbers to make yourself look more productive. A coworker could be getting accolades, and it can create the temptation to talk poorly about them to discredit their efforts.We have all experienced moments when our displeasure or dissatisfaction causes us to make choices we later regret. We are human after all. But don’t let the lack of patience tempt you to fall.No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it (1 Corinthians 10:13).Whenever you are tempted, God gives you a way out. The next time your lack of patience may try to pull you in a direction or to make a decision that will cause remorse; pause, remember God’s faithfulness, and take the way of escape. God promises he will help you endure and prevail.
Presented by Lisa BishopDo you consider yourself a patient person?If you are anything like me, I really don’t like waiting. I can get impatient when a meeting doesn’t start on time or when I am waiting for a friend who is running late for our lunch date. I can also be impatient when I am not feeling heard or understood, or when I have been praying about something for a long time and I am just not getting the clarity I crave. When do you find yourself lacking patience? Impatience runs the gamut. From small scenarios when your patience is tested to bigger circumstances in life that require endurance.Proverbs 14:29 teaches us,Whoever is patient has great understanding, but one who is quick-tempered displays folly.I want to share a few tips with you on developing patience. Stop and do an internal inquiry: The next time you feel impatience surfacing stop and ask yourself, “Why am I getting impatient?” Sometimes we find ourselves swept up in a moment and getting what I call emotionally hijacked. We are not using our rational thinking brain. Stop to really examine why impatience is your go to at that moment. Matthew 12:34 says, the mouth speaks from the overflow of the heart. What is going on in your heart? Make it a goal: When we set goals, they often revolve around things we want to achieve and not so much on who we want to be. Think about your vision for your relationships and how you want people to experience you. Be determined to have your mindset, attitude and heart set on practicing patience. This will create greater connection in your relationships. Practice patience in your daily life: Train yourself to be patient in the small things, such as waiting in line or dealing with unexpected delays. Use those moments as opportunities to intentionally cultivate self-restraint. Seek God's help: Remember you have the power of the Holy Spirit dwelling in you. Romans 8:26 says, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. Take time to ask for his help.Join me in this prayer as we strive to live lives marked by patience.“Father, thank you for being patient with me! Transform me with your love and with your spirit and help me to grow in my capacity for patience. I yield to you, Holy Spirit. Remind me I have a choice on how I respond to people and that when I ask, you will help me to handle any situation that comes my way with graciousness, kindness and patience. Amen.”
Presented by Lisa BishopHave you ever lost your cool or reacted in a way you later regretted?We’re examining patience—that all too important fruit of the spirit we can often bypass and find difficult to practice in our daily interactions. Yet, as followers of Jesus, patience is not optional.If you were to reflect on the past 48-72 hours, can you identify moments where your patience was lacking? It can be tempting to get frustrated with a coworker or fly off the handle with a family member or spouse. But when you are tempted to have the flesh response of a quick temper or being easily irritated, you can look to the words of the Apostle Paul to redirect you and ground you in your identity. And your identity informs your propensity toward patience.Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you (Colossians 3:12-13).As a chosen son or daughter that God loves, you are called to clothe yourself in Christ-like characteristics. I think we often spend more time planning and preparing our wardrobe for the day, and we don’t give much intentional thought about putting on attitudes and behaviors that put the glory of God on display. Now don’t get me wrong, living out these Christ-like qualities is not easy. Patience does not develop overnight. Yet, Colossians gives us clues on how to develop patience. When you have the mind of Christ, merciful, kind, humble, and gentle, you position yourself for patience. When you make allowances for people’s faults, as you would like others to do for you, you find yourself less testy. I think a lack of patience can kick in when things are not going the way we want, or someone is not conforming to our preferences.When we are not humble, we become easily offended and reactive holding onto minor offenses or irritations that build and then impatience becomes our default.When and with whom do you find yourself lacking patience? To truly transform you will need to be proactive. Rather than getting wrapped up in the same old reaction, decide now how you will respond with patience. As you break the habit of being easily aggravated, ask the Holy Spirit to help you but also be determined to clothe yourself in patience rather than losing your cool.
Presented by Lisa BishopDo you know God is patient with you? God himself states this about his character when in Exodus 34:6-7 he declares,The Lord, the Lord, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, maintaining love to thousands, and forgiving wickedness, rebellion and sin.We see throughout the Old Testament the numerous times the Israelites tested God’s patience by chasing after their own man-made gods and continually disobeying the Lord’s instructions on multiple occasions. And they did experience the repercussions brought on by their own behavior. But if you look closely, even when they rebel, God is always slow to anger and quick to forgive. He demonstrates patience as the Israelites defy him time and time again. And when he does express anger, it is a response to human evil and is ultimately an expression of his compassion and loyal love. He knows their rebellious ways and God is not content to let his people self-destruct. He gives them time to acknowledge their waywardness and repent; and in the waiting, he never removes his compassion, mercy, and love from them. He will never remove his compassion, mercy, and love from you.Sometimes we think God is just waiting to unleash his dissatisfaction on us when we mess up, and that is not true. God is not punitive. Any punishment you deserve, Jesus paid the price for. Period. And God isn’t like us. He doesn’t lash out in the heat of a moment or get angry at petty and small things. His anger burns at true injustice, and again, even then, he is ultimately slow to become angry.You may have had an earthly father who was quick with harsh words or ready to turn into a full-on rage when you made the slightest misstep. If that is what you experienced growing up, I want to say that I am sorry for the pain that caused you. You deserved to be loved fully, and treated with kindness, care and tenderness. Sometimes it is hard to believe our heavenly father is patient and loving because we did not have a great example of a compassionate father here on earth.Whether you had a father who demonstrated patience or lack of, I pray that you would grow more and more in the true knowledge of God. That he is compassionate and merciful, slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love for you.
There’s a very well-known verse in 1 Corinthians 13:13 that says:And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.And you know, we talk and think a lot about faith and love. We hear many sermons on faith and love. We know we need to build our faith and learn to love better. But how often have you even talked about hope? Did you ever hear a sermon on hope or go to a Bible study on hope? Have you ever intentionally worked at building your hope, growing in your hope, becoming a more hope-filled person? Yet, God says it’s one of the three things that remain, and therefore it should have a place of importance in our lives, don’t you think? God places a high value on hope, and so should we.A book by Ray Johnston entitled The Hope Quotient really caught my attention as I read it. I highly recommend the book to you because Johnston presents a compelling case for the importance of building our hope, maintaining our hope, making sure our hope is not crushed by life. I don’t have to tell you that it’s not easy to remain hopeful in this evil world, is it? Just think of the days when your hope has been dashed. It makes you want to give up; it saps your energy and drains your enthusiasm. And if you are not prepared to build your hope, to unleash hope even in the face of disappointments, you will find yourself sitting on the sidelines of life, discouraged and depressed way too often.So, today I want to give you just a taste of some of the things that are covered in this book, The Hope Quotient, and hopefully encourage you to realize that you can, through Christ, unleash hope in your life in a new and exciting way. I can tell you that this book study has given me a new understanding of the importance of unleashing hope in my life.Let me begin by making sure we know what hope is and what it isn’t. First, hope is much more than an emotion you feel. It is not wishful thinking or blind optimism. The kind of hope we’re focusing on comes from God through Jesus Christ, so you need to be a Christ-follower in order to tap into the hope he gives. You unleash this hope through the power of Christ in you. It’s not something you just work up on your own. It requires more power than you have in yourself, but if you know Jesus as your Savior, you have what is required to unleash hope in your life through the Holy Spirit and through Scripture.Sadly, however, many Christ-followers are not unleashing hope in their lives, and they live in a state of discouragement and quiet desperation. Does that describe you? If you’re not doing what you need to do to keep hope alive in your heart and mind, you’re missing one of the greatest gifts, one of the greatest advantages we have as Christ-followers. We read in Hebrews that we have this hope as an anchor for our soul, firm and secure. An anchor is something that holds a boat or ship in place, keeping it from moving. Hope for a Christian provides an anchor of strength and support in the midst of this stormy world we live in. Hope is the thing that will keep you from going under.So, what I’d like to do now is give you a taste of some of the very practical and biblical advice from this book, which I believe will help you begin to understand the importance of unleashing hope in your life and give you some tools to make that happen. I’ve often said that discouragement is the devil’s most effective tool in our lives. Hope is the cure for discouragement. It’s so very important.In his book, Ray Johnston says that “Becoming a person with hope—defeating discouragement and building a new future—is always a result of raising seven hope factors. . .” I want to emphasize two of the seven factors that will unleash hope in your life.The first one is: “Recharge Your Batteries.” If hope is to be unleashed in your life, you have to continually replenish the things in your life which fuel you. When you run out of fuel, all your expertise and giftedness and experience...
My question is: When your cup runs over, what spills out? During the times when we are jostled on life's roller-coaster seas, what's inside of us will come spilling out. If it's thankfulness and trust and joy in the Lord, that will come out. If it's bitterness or worry or self-centeredness, that will come spilling out.The secret is to make sure you're filled up on the inside with the right stuff. Then you don't have to worry about what comes out. We need cups filled with Jesus. Friends, I am more and more convinced that the focus of my life has to be simply and only Jesus. There's an old hymn that I love which says: Only Jesus, only Jesus, only he can satisfy.It reminds me that regardless of the circumstances, if I'm filled with Jesus, I will be satisfied, I will be joyful, I will be spilling over with the beauty of Jesus.Oh, that doesn't mean I have to be happy about negative situations, about difficult things. But what is so great about being a Christian is that with Jesus, we can know his peace and contentment and joy in the midst of all those troublesome situations.How do we get our cups filled up with Jesus? Through the Word—the bread of heaven. If the time you spend in the Bible is not very much and not consistent, you cup won't be full of Jesus, and when it spills over, you won't like what you see. But if you pour the Word of God and prayer into your cup regularly, then your cup will spill over with the peace and compassion of Jesus Christ.You fill your cup up with Jesus by thinking about him all through the day. Do you practice his presence regularly? Do you communicate with him all through the day, and seek his guidance in all things? That will fill your cup up with Jesus.So, I encourage you to use every jostle, every bump in the road as an opportunity to check up on yourself. When the boss upsets you and causes you to complain, you know you need to clean out the inside of that cup. When someone does you wrong, and you respond with patience and tolerance, you know Jesus is spilling out of your cup. When the money is low and you spill over with worry and fear, you need to work on the inside of the cup. When your health is not good, but you praise God anyway, you are spilling over the beauty of Jesus.When your cup runs over, what spills out? A good question to ask ourselves every day.
Is there some adversity in your life at present? Do you have a situation that is getting to you? Maybe it's a person you work with, or your boss, or the whole job itself. Perhaps it's financial difficulties or a health problem. It could be almost anything. If your cup is being jostled right now, what is spilling out?If you're not happy with what you see spilling out of your cup from time to time, then you need to get the inside clean, really clean. Turn those adversities into positive movement in your spiritual life. The earlier you begin, the better and the easier it is to face yourself and make changes.Remember, if you keep going through life, refusing to look at what is spilling out of your cup and get that cup cleaned up, as you grow older those irritating, unpleasant, un-Christlike traits will become more and more entrenched and more and more difficult to clean out.Let me remind you of Romans 5:3-5:Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.Our cups are jostled to show us what's inside, so that we can develop a mature Christian character. It's rather painful sometimes to have to face up to the mess that's spilling out of our cups, but the sooner we face it, confess it, and ask God to change us, the better equipped we'll be to let God fill our cups with himself, so that when we spill over, people see the likeness of Christ in us.Often, we use the expression “my cup overflows” when we feel particularly blessed and happy. Well, that's the way it should be—our cup should overflow with good things but not just when the circumstances are good. Even in the tough times, even when we don't feel like it, even when we can't see what God is doing, even when we are plagued with discouragement or doubts—even then in the midst of the trouble, our cups should overflow with God's goodness.Today check it out: Does your cup overflow with good things only when things are going your way? Or does it overflow with God's goodness to you even in the midst of trouble?
I'm examining cups—in particular, your cup. What comes spilling out of your cup when it runs over, when something causes it to be jostled or upset? We learn a great deal about ourselves as we take a look at what comes out of our cups in those stressful moments.Do you remember what Jesus said to the Scribes and Pharisees about cups? It's found in Matthew 23:25-26:Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You clean the outside of the cup and dish, but inside they are full of greed and self-indulgence. Blind Pharisee! First clean the inside of the cup and dish, and then the outside also will be clean.Can you imagine how those Scribes and Pharisees felt, being accused of robbery and self-indulgence? They saw themselves as the epitome of uprightness; after all they were meticulous about keeping the law. They were so very careful about outward appearances, and they did the right thing at the right time and followed all the traditions. They were the ultimate in political correctness! And Jesus shows them that all that exterior stuff is no good if on the inside they are harboring bad attitudes and motives.We all are guilty at times of cleaning up the outside of our cups and allowing things to remain on the inside that need to come out. And Jesus made the point very clear: it's what is on the inside of the cups that matters to him.Let me take the illustration a step further. If I had a perfectly clean cup filled with fresh milk and offered it to you, you'd have no difficulty drinking it. But if I took that same fresh cup of milk and put one small teaspoon of vinegar in it, I doubt you'd be willing to drink it. Though it contained mostly good healthy milk, that one teaspoon of vinegar would ruin the contents of the entire cup.I hardly have to apply this illustration for you, I'm sure. It doesn't take very much bitterness to ruin what is in your cup. Or malice, or envy or pride or unkindness or unthankfulness or . . . the list could go on and on. That's why it is so important to see what is in your cup that needs to be cleaned out.Check it out today. When your cup runs over, what spills out?
Have you had your cup jostled lately? I learn a lot about myself when things go wrong and my cup gets bumped, because what's inside comes spilling out, and sometimes it's not that pleasant.Often, it’s true our job and the people we work with are great places to get bumped and jostled. I well remember a job situation that caused my cup to spill over. I was dealing with a very difficult boss, who managed through humiliation and intimidation. At first, I had great difficulty with this person, and when God challenged me to take a serious look at what came spilling out of my cup because of this difficult relationship, I wasn't too pleased.Selfishness was the first thing I saw come running over the sides. I realized my thought patterns had been centered on such sentiments as "I can't take this anymore," or "This is not fair to me," and "I've worked too hard to get where I am to have to put up with this kind of treatment."Unfair and unkind treatment will come our way from time to time, and that kind of treatment really reveals the self-centeredness that's inside of us.This unpleasant job environment caused another thing to come spilling out of my jostled cup: I had to admit a severe lack of patience. Patience is not one of my strong points, but it is one of the fruits of the Spirit that I should exhibit. So here again, I had to confess that a whole lot of impatience was spilling out of my cup.In Psalm 103:8 we read the Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love. When I began to compare my behavior with God's behavior toward me, I had no choice but to repent of my own lack of tolerance, and ask God to give me his graciousness and kindness.Another thing this stressful situation caused to spill out of my cup was malice. Isn't that an awful word? Malice is the desire to see others suffer. And I saw I had a heart full of malice toward the person causing me the difficulty. And along with malice, we usually have slander, because as soon as we express those malicious thoughts, we have become guilty of slander.It wasn't pleasant to see what came running over the sides of my cup in that situation. But it caused me to get serious about cleaning up my cup. And with prayer and the convicting power of the Holy Spirit, changes started to take place.Watch yourself today. If your cup is jostled, take note of what spills out.
It's not difficult to look good when everything's going okay. But it's at those times when we have to endure some unfavorable circumstances or some unpleasant treatment that we find out what we're like on the inside. Ask yourself: When your cup runs over, what spills out?As long as you never move a full cup, nothing will spill out of it. But if you hit it accidentally and move it in some way, you're likely to have what's on the inside come spilling over the sides. The same is true of us: When we're jostled and shoved, pushed and bumped, whatever is inside of us comes spilling over the edge. And then we learn things about ourselves we might never have known otherwise.If we lined a number of cups up on a table in front of you and asked you to tell us what was inside them from just looking at the outside of the cup, you could only guess. A china cup looks as though it should have tea inside. A larger cup might appear to be a soup cup. A smaller cup is often used for expresso. On down the row, we could all guess from looking at the outside what was inside that cup.But as long as the cups sit very still, undisturbed, and we're looking only at the outside from a distance, we can't really know what's inside of them. However, if I shake the table on which they're sitting, or tip one of them over, you will immediately know what's inside, because it will spill out. That lovely tea cup, all polished and clean on the outside, could have tea—or it could have muddy water. That nice soup cup might indeed have hot soup—or it could have old coffee grounds and dirt.What happens when you get bumped? How do you react when your table is tilted, and you go toppling over? You may look really all-together on the outside, very polished and pretty. But how do you look when your insides show?It doesn't take a major earthquake to cause a cup to spill its contents. Quite often the smallest little tremor can tip our cups dramatically. In fact, for me, it's the little things that tip my cup most often. It seems like I can handle big situations better than I can the little irritations, the unkind word, the sarcastic remark, the unfair treatment. But whether the bumps are large or small, the unpleasant situations in our lives will reveal the ingredients inside of us.When your cup runs over, what spills out?
If God were to speak to you today, what barrier would he have to overcome to get through to you? If you feel like you can’t hear God speak to you anymore, it’s probably because some barrier is there that needs to be removed.The first and probably most common barrier is that we are just too busy to hear God. How have we allowed our lives to become so hectic, so over-scheduled, that we really don’t have time to listen to God and others as well? There’s just not a lot of listening going on, is there? Years ago, I realized I could be addicted to activity, and so, I simply began praying that God would deliver me from being obsessed with busyness.In order to hear God, you have to block out other distracting voices and sounds. That means some quiet time, some uninterrupted time, which you devote to God and hearing him talk to you. For me this usually happens in the early morning before the day’s activities get in the way. Mostly God speaks through his written Word, but the way you approach reading the Bible will determine whether you really hear God or not. It helps to begin with a prayer that God will speak to you through his Word, and then you read with the intention of hearing what God is saying to you. If your mind wanders—as mine often does—and you realize you haven’t really been listening as you read, just make yourself start again, and discipline yourself to focus on the words and meditate on what you’re reading.I have a structured plan for reading the Bible, and when I approach that time with the attitude that I want to hear what God is saying to me today, it never fails that something pops off the page and stops me cold. For example, I was reading Philippians recently, and verse 16 in chapter three spoke directly to me. It says, Only let us live up to what we have already attained.I stopped there and began to write in my journal what God was saying to me. I’ve read that chapter many times, but that verse was new to me this time, and God spoke to me about some things I need to do to live up to what I already know. I heard God speak to me.I urge you to set aside time to hear God through his Word and put in writing what you hear. There is nothing more important than letting God speak to you, and he will, if you’re not too busy to listen. If you need some help structuring your Bible reading, my Bible study, A Guide on Getting to Know God, offers some suggestions on how you could have a more meaningful time with God each day, so you can truly hear what he wants to say to you.When we feel we just can’t connect with God, we can be sure of one thing: It isn’t God’s fault. He hasn’t moved. He waits with anticipation to have fellowship with us. So, when barriers come between us and God, it’s because we’ve allowed them to be there.Another barrier that gets in our way is that we are often just too self-absorbed. Life is all about us. Our thoughts center on us; we are the center of our world, and so God just can’t penetrate that barrier.We’ve been led to believe that all we need to live a fulfilling life is to have good self-esteem, but what I’ve come to learn is that self is not my solution; self is my problem! True, I need to see my worth in Christ and appreciate who I am in him, but striving for more good self-esteem or self-confidence just makes me self-focused, and that inevitably takes me down the wrong path.If you want to listen to God—really hear what he wants to say to you—you have to take yourself off the throne of your heart and let God be God again. Honestly, that’s pretty much a daily thing I have to remember—to actually go through my daily activities with the conscious awareness that it’s not all about me. It’s all about God. It’s so easy to become self-absorbed, so we have to stand guard against it all the time.Jesus gave us principles that seem contradictory to our self-focused minds, like, if you want to save your life, you have to lose it, and if you want to be first,
When God hasn't answered your questions, when you can see no justification for what's going on in your life, learn to talk to yourself.In Psalm 77:7-9 we see an example of Asaph talking to himself. He expressed his rage, saying,Will the Lord reject forever? Will he never show his favor again?Has his unfailing love vanished forever? Has his promise failed for all time?Has God forgotten to be merciful?Then after saying those words of doubt and anger, and I think hearing in his own ears how foolish they were, Asaph said, in Psalm 77:10-12,Then I thought, “To this I will appeal: the years when the Most High stretched out his right hand.I will remember the deeds of the Lord; yes, I will remember your miracles of long ago.I will consider all your works and meditate on all your mighty deeds.”Asaph got the foolish, angry words out of his mouth, expressing to his understanding and patient God all his anger and frustration. And then he changed his thinking and started remembering all that God had done.Ah, there's our answer, friends. Renewing our minds with correct thinking about who God is and what he has done for us. Just as Asaph needed to get back to who Jehovah God is and what he had done, so we must as well.When the questions have no answers, you may have to abandon them or be willing to live with the unanswered questions. But you don't have to live in despair or anger; the same God who for whatever reason does not answer your questions is the God who will bring you comfort and strength to face them.I often think of the question Jesus asked his disciples when many of his followers were forsaking him.“You do not want to leave too, do you?” Jesus asked the twelve.Simon Peter answered him, “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life (John 6:67-68).Friends, where else will you go with your unanswered questions? If there are no answers from God, then trust him to see you through. There's a song I like a great deal, which says, "God is too wise to be mistaken, God is too good to be unkind. So, when you can’t understand, when you don’t see his plan, when you can't trace his hand, trust his heart.” And that's what I would leave you with today. When you can't see why he's doing what he's doing, you can still trust his goodness and his love for you. When you can't trace his hand, trust his heart.
How do we cope when God never gives us an answer, and we think he should? The Psalms are of great help to us here, for frequently both David and Asaph expressed their frustration at the lack of answers.In Psalm 44 David says to the Lord,But now you have rejected and humbled us ...You have made us a reproach to our neighbors ...You have made us a byword among the nations ... All this has happened to us, though we had not forgotten you or been false to your covenant ... Awake, O Lord! Why do you sleep? ... Why do you hide your face and forget our misery and oppression?That's an angry man, expressing it openly to God. And at that moment, with no answers to his questions, his anger was vented toward God.Now, I don't want to imply I think we should yell and scream at God when we please. But I do want to say if you are living with those difficult, unanswered questions, it's okay for you to tell God exactly how you feel about them. Please tell God; he knows your feelings and thoughts anyway, and if you don't ventilate those thoughts, or you try to deny or ignore them, they will turn into bitterness and depression.Who better to tell than God? He understands you completely, and no one will be fairer or gentler to you than he will be. He didn't chide Martha for her questions. He didn't zap David and Asaph for voicing their anger. And isn't it interesting that all of that is recorded in Scripture for us to read. That's not an accident, you know; it's there to show us how to deal with unanswered questions. So, if the questions and the anger are smoldering inside of you, get alone with God and voice them to him, out loud.I notice that every time David or Asaph voiced their frustration about their unanswered questions, soon they were led back to that basic trust in God which was the cornerstone of their lives.One of David's frequent phrases was,Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me?Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God (Psalm 43:5).So, turn to God today with your unanswered questions. Pour them out to him, but then go back to what you know about who God is. Say with David, "I will put my hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.”
I’m examining those times in our lives when there are no answers. Mary and Martha faced that situation when Lazarus died. Why didn't Jesus come and heal him? They could not understand why.We all remember the end of this story; Jesus did meet their need by performing an incredible miracle and raising Lazarus from the dead. In this case, Mary and Martha finally got answers, as they saw their brother come forth after four days in that tomb.So, eventually Martha and Mary could say to each other, "When it looked as though Jesus had forsaken us, he really was working on our behalf to do something even greater than we could imagine."Sometimes it works out like that. We go through the no-answer period when the circumstances make no sense to us whatsoever, but at a later date, in God's time, we are able to see what God's good purpose was.Maybe you are now in that tough place where Mary and Martha were initially. You're wondering why Jesus hasn't come to you; you're feeling unloved and neglected by him. Please do take courage and remember that often we misunderstand God's timetable. It may be that you will soon see the deliverance of God and your eyes will be opened to understand the whys.But what about when we don't get those answers? Your Lazarus never comes out of the tomb. You're left to face those unanswered questions for the rest of your life.You know, I believe for those of us who are Christ-followers, it is extremely difficult to face the fact God is not going to answer our questions, and we'll never know why certain things happen. After all, we're supposed to have answers, aren't we? We've always told people Jesus is the answer. Jesus can meet all their needs. Therefore, those unanswered questions can undermine our faith and cause us to doubt the God we serve.I want to say that if you have unanswered questions, God is not going to condemn you for asking the questions, for feeling anger at the unjust circumstances. He even understands you're likely to go through a period of being angry at him. God is big enough to handle your anger.But your light will break forth and your peace will come when you give up the questions that have no answers, and reaffirm that even in the midst of confusion, you still trust the God who you know is faithful and good.
My question for you is: How do you and I, as Christians, cope when there are no answers? When we are convinced God should respond, circumstances should change, or things should be different? When we want so much to know why, and the answers aren't there?Mary and Martha had that problem. They sent for Jesus to heal their brother, but when Jesus finally arrived, it was too late; Lazarus was already dead. Martha was upset with Jesus, and we read in John 11:21 she said to him, Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died. She asked him for an answer to her question: Why didn't you come, Lord?I find Jesus' words to her at this time very interesting. He did not defend his actions; he did not say, "Martha, let me explain to you exactly what I did and why.” No, when Martha was looking for answers to her unanswered questions, Jesus took her back to basics.Jesus said to her, "I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die; and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?” (John 11:25-26).You see, if Martha believes this, the condition of Lazarus at the present moment is not of such great consequence, because Lazarus believed in Jesus, and he would never die an eternal death.Jesus wanted Martha to think with an eternal perspective. Yes, her brother’s body was in a tomb, but the real Lazarus had not died, and if Martha can focus her mind on that, it will change her perspective altogether. And to her credit, Martha confessed out loud, yes, Lord, I believe that you are the Christ, the Son of God, who was to come into the world.When you don't have answers, stop and ask a different question: Who do you believe Jesus is? And then confess out loud exactly what you believe about the person of Jesus. It's important that you say it out loud, I think, so you can hear your own confession of faith.We may never know some of the answers we're looking for this side of heaven, but we can always confidently know the answer to the question: Who do you think Jesus is? By concentrating your thoughts on who he is, you will have the peace and strength you need for those unanswered questions. If that was the question Jesus asked Martha when she wanted answers, then surely it is the starting place for us today when we want answers but they’re not forthcoming.
One of the first words we learn is why. If there's a child under five in your home right now, you probably hear that word many times each day. It seems from the very beginning we want explanations and answers. But what do we do when there are no answers?I don't like unanswered questions, do you? I don't like loose ends and unfinished business. Yet life is full of them.I tell you quite frankly there are many times I can't find an answer for things that happen to me and to others. I bombard heaven with my whys, but the heavens are silent. You may be right now in the midst of some situation for which you can find no answers. God is silent. The heavens are like stone. You've begged for explanations, but none have come. What do we do when there are no answers?Mary and Martha faced that dilemma when Lazarus died. You know the story. They sent for Jesus to come and heal Lazarus. They were confident Jesus could heal him and prevent his death, and that he would do so, for they knew how Jesus loved Lazarus and them.They sent out their cry for help, but we read in John 11:6 when Jesus heard Lazarus was sick, he stayed where he was two more days. He loved them but he didn't come to their rescue. Why? I can see Martha and Mary waiting by the side of their sick brother, expecting Jesus to walk through the door any minute. But as hour by hour passed, Jesus didn't show up. Lazarus got worse and worse, and they watched him die.Do you think they wondered if Jesus really loved them during that time? Don't you imagine they must have felt abandoned and forsaken by Jesus, to realize he could have come and healed their brother, but he chose not to?Have you felt that way? I think we all go through similar reactions when there are no answers. Even if you feel abandoned, the good news is, you are not. Jesus has promised never to leave you or forsake you, and he never fails to keep his promise. So, let me encourage you today with what David said as recorded in Psalm 40:1: I waited patiently for the LORD; he turned to me and heard my cry. The Lord hears your cry, and he has not forsaken you.
Presented by Lisa BishopWe are familiar with that well-known expression “patience is a virtue,” and we know that patience is also a Christ-like characteristic. As followers of Jesus, we are called to exercise patience in our lives as we put Jesus on display. Although we are aware that we are to practice this virtue, admittedly it’s also something we can find hard to exhibit. At least I know I can. I can’t tell you how many times I have lacked patience and prayed for more of it.A few weeks ago, I spent the day with my cousin Jessica at the Art Institute of Chicago. If you haven’t been, I highly recommend it! I am definitely not an art aficionado, but I do value culture and creating memorable experiences. My love language is quality time after all, so getting to spend the day with my cousin filled my tank. As we were walking through the halls of what is hailed to be one of the largest art museums in the world, we came across the Canova exhibit. It showcased the work of Antonio Canova who is said to be the most celebrated European artist of his time and is renowned for his marble statues that convey a sense of “ideal beauty with remarkable lifelikeness.” As I walked through the exhibit, I marveled at the intricacies of the marble statues on display. The exhibit had a video playing in the background demonstrating the process of creating the beautiful statues from start to finish. It showed what it looks like for an artist with his tools to carefully chip away at what, to the eye, looks to be just a block of marble, until a beautiful masterpiece eventually appears.As with many artists, before even one strike of the chisel, Conova already saw what the marble block would become. His vision for the piece was already determined. It would just take time and a (sometimes) painstaking process to bring his masterpiece to life; ultimately, it would reveal every predetermined, beautiful, meticulous detail. One of his famous sculptures, Cupid’s Kiss, is said to have taken six years to create. I can only imagine the amount of patience it must have taken over those six years to see his vision come to reality.One dictionary definition describes patience as, “The ability to wait, or to continue doing something despite difficulties, or to suffer without complaining or becoming annoyed.” I will be the first to raise my hand and say that many times I have failed the patience test. Yet, the Bible tells us that patience is a fruit of the Holy Spirit. As you mature in your faith, you are to grow in patience. And growing in patience is rarely easy. In order to grow in this Christlike character, it often means being in a situation that requires it. I know that at times I have prayed for patience only to experience a situation, or shall I say “opportunity,” that was the means to produce this fruit of the Spirit in me.The Greek word translated to patience in the New Testament means, “The characteristic of a person who is not swerved from his/her deliberate purpose or loyalty to faith by even the greatest trials and sufferings.”What is an area of your life that may be currently trying your patience? Is there something you desire or something you have been waiting for that seems like it’s taking forever? What might be a situation in your life that requires steadfastness, faithfulness, and endurance?When you are presented with circumstances that warrant patience, your faith can be tested. But God, in his faithfulness, will produce something beautiful in the waiting.I was talking to a friend the other day, and she was describing what she calls the “messy middle.” Her life and career had been taking one direction when suddenly it took a massive detour she did not see coming. Now, for the past three years, she has been in the process of waiting and wondering what God is doing.What’s your messy middle? Maybe you have been out of work and are waiting for a job so that you can relieve the financial strain and provide for your ...
I wonder if you can now look back on some waiting period of your life and realize what God was doing for you then. I think of a friend who was in a very difficult work situation with a co-worker who was not only unpleasant, but malicious and aggressive. This co-worker deliberately told lies about my friend to upper management and played the political games to win favor with them and cause my friend to be in dis-favor.Almost every week my friend would come to our Sunday class and share the latest story of what this woman had done to her. She was truly treated unfairly and unjustly, and it wasn’t right. But through it all, the one message that God gave her was “wait.” She was reminded that vengeance belongs to the Lord, and he would fight this battle for her.So, she kept her mouth shut, refused to be vindictive, and continued to do her job with excellence. This went on for two long years; that’s a long waiting room. But then her difficult co-worker came down with a very serious illness that kept her out of the office for months. And during her absence management came to understand the truth. They saw that my friend was doing all the work; they understood that this sick co-worker had lied to them about my friend.They proceeded to give my friend a promotion and rewarded her openly in front of the entire large department. My friend was vindicated by God, and she could then see how important it was for her to let God fight her battle and be patient during that long waiting period.When this disruptive co-worker did return to work, she was placed in another department and was no longer given the prestige and importance she had before. God took care of this person in the right way and my friend was vindicated.But suppose she had refused to wait. She could have complained and argued and fought with this woman, and in the process destroyed her testimony. Instead, by being willing to wait for God’s timing, she became a shining light in a dark world, and God honored her patience and obedience.So, if God has you in a waiting room right now, learn to wait patiently. He has good plans for you, but you’ll mess them up if you insist on your timing. God is totally trustworthy, so let go and wait on the Lord.
I recall a three-year delay God gave me, when I so wanted to leave a job I was in. From my vantage point, no good could be served by my remaining in that job another day. I had a most difficult boss, and I didn't like the work. It was so painful to get up and make myself go to that office each morning. So, in my usual style, I got the resume updated, and started the job search. I had full confidence I could find another suitable job quickly.Days turned into weeks and months, and jobs that looked like a shoe-in fell through. “What's happening, God? Why did you let that job fall through? That would have gotten me out of this mess.” Those were my sentiments at that point in time.But finally, I recognized God wasn't letting me out of this one yet. And so, I gave him permission to keep me there as long as it served his purposes, though I couldn't imagine what good purposes could possibly be served. That's the place we have to come to.Read this carefully: Patience is accepting a difficult situation from God without giving him a timetable to remove it. Read it again: Patience is accepting a difficult situation from God without giving him a timetable to remove it.Been giving God any timetables lately? If only we can learn to accept those waiting periods in our lives as from his hand, and say, "Lord, it's your timetable not mine. I accept this situation as long as you choose to allow it.” That is walking by faith, my friends.Had I left that job when I wanted to, I would have missed three years of personal development that have been essential to my walk with God and the ministry he has given me. I would have missed the tough lessons I learned that molded my character and helped me mature. And in addition, during those three years I acquired business skills and experience, which allowed me to become self-employed, and that turned out to be absolutely essential in order to begin this ministry. God knew what he was doing.If you're in that predicament today, wondering why God hasn't done anything yet, try to remember that the day will come when you can look back and see how he was developing you in that time.
When as a Christ-follower you are in a waiting room where there is absolutely nothing you can do but wait, and it looks disastrous to you, then you are backed into a corner where you are forced to learn to trust God more.We sang a song in my church recently that was new to me, and some of the words really stuck with me. It said,I'm fighting a battle You've already wonNo matter what comes my way, I will overcomeI don't know what you're doing, but I know what you've doneAnd I'm fighting a battle You've already wonWhen God’s people were facing three enemy armies sure to wipe them out, the prophet of the Lord said to Jehoshaphat and all God’s people:This is what the Lord says to you: Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God’s (2 Chron. 20:15).If you’re in God’s waiting room right now—you don’t know what’s going to happen with your job, your financial situation looks pretty dismal, that report from your doctor has left you in fear, whatever it is—you’re waiting on answers and solutions. I urge you to remember this: You don’t know what God’s doing, but you know what he’s done. Recall all those times when you were worried or fearful, and how God was there for you and got you through. Recall all his promises to you, his totally dependable promises. And just tell him, “I don’t know what you’re doing and maybe I never will, or maybe it’s going to be a long time before I will understand, but I’m resting in the knowledge that I know who you are, and I know what you’ve done. You are trustworthy, and I trust you.”If some battle has you in a waiting room, the Lord says to you, “The battle is not yours but mine.” You’re fighting a battle he’s already won. He has promised never to leave you, nothing can separate you from his love, and all things will work together for his good. I don’t know how or when or if it will work out the way you want it to, but I know that if you have placed your trust in Jesus Christ, and since nothing or nobody can snatch you out of his hand, then you’re in a good place. You don’t know what he’s doing, but you know what he’s done. Trust him!
The Bible tells us without faith it is impossible to please God, and we must learn to walk by faith and not by sight.Let's face it: Walking by faith and not by sight is not very comfortable. Frankly, walking by faith would be a lesson I would never learn if it were left up to me, how about you? Give me my choice and I'll have all my problems solved immediately, I'll choose a predictable, well-planned, and executed life, without problems, without difficulties, without heartaches. Who wouldn't?And, of course, God knows that, but because he's my heavenly Father, with all wisdom and knowledge, he also knows that would not be good for me. Just imagine what we'd be like if we never had to walk by faith. First of all, we wouldn't please God, for without faith it's impossible to please him and without waiting periods, our faith would never develop.Secondly, we'd have little character since character is developed through waiting periods; we'd have no compassion for others since we would not be able to understand their struggles; we'd be proud and self-satisfied. There would be no cutting edge on our lives, no reason to turn to God daily with our needs, no learning to feed on his Word and rest in his care. No, a life of ease without those waiting periods would not be good for us, and our trustworthy heavenly Father knows that, even when we don't.I think if we could grasp the blessedness of trusting God and the freedom and joy that brings into our lives, then waiting periods would look entirely different to us. We see them as great difficulties or at least annoying inconveniences. God sees how they force us to learn to know him and trust him, and of course, that is more important than anything else.Ask God to give you a different perspective on your waiting periods.
Have you ever said: "Lord, it's enough! When are you going to do something about this? Why are you waiting so long?” Well, I don't know anyone who hasn't asked those questions of God at some time or another in their Christian walk.Why is waiting so hard for us? Why do we chomp at the bit so easily when God doesn't do what we think he should do when we think he should do it? Let me share my own answers to those questions and see if you can identify with me.Waiting is difficult for me because I don't like the unknown. I want to know what lies out there; mysteries frighten me, especially where my own future is concerned. Waiting is tough for me because I'm a here and now person, and I want everything in neat little rows, no strings left hanging, no problems left unsolved.Waiting is hard for me when I think I know the right solution and can see no benefit in waiting for it to happen. In fact, it usually appears disastrous to me to think it won't happen on my schedule. Waiting is hard for me because I tend to be a controlling person, and I want to feel that everything's on schedule.Undoubtedly, you can relate to some of my difficulties with waiting and perhaps add a few of your own. When I take a closer look, I have to conclude my problem is I don't want to let go and trust God. I'm afraid to trust God. It is a sinful, though frequently undetected, attitude that I've got better solutions, better schedules, better ideas than God. It is a false trust in myself. That's a little tough to face, but I believe it is the root cause of my struggles—and yours too—when God keeps us waiting.The truth is the waiting periods of our lives are very important to our spiritual growth and understanding of God, for through them we learn to walk by faith and not by sight.
Fran works as a project manager for a marketing company, and she is responsible to secure new clients and then manage their projects to completion. Today we find Fran finishing a conversation with one of her clients. "Yes, Marge, I will do my very best to have that ready by tomorrow. Uh-huh, yes, I understand. Okay, Marge, I'll talk to you tomorrow.” Fran hangs up the phone and begins talking to herself, forgetting for a moment that Jesus, of course, hears everything she says or thinks."I don't believe that woman. She is going to drive me nuts! Nothing we do is good enough for her. She makes last minute changes and then expects me to work miracles. And she is so rude. I really can't stand her!"Quietly she can sense the Spirit of God whispering to her: "Did you ever think that I love her as much as I love you?"The thought startles her. "Well, yeah sure I knew that,” she thinks out loud. “You love everybody, Lord. But she's a really nasty, demanding person. I'm sorry; I just don't like her."As these thoughts continue, her mind goes back to a recent sermon she heard where her pastor said that there were people Jesus didn’t like, but he loved everybody. He had said that you don’t have to like everybody, but our commandment is to show God’s love to everybody."I thought you have to like someone, then you can love them,” Fran says to herself, “but I guess that’s not the way it is with God. The problem is, I just don’t know how to do it. There's just no way I can love Marge. She's obnoxious!”"Do you want to love her?" again that quiet voice of Jesus catches her up short."Do I really want to love her? Tell you the truth—not really," Fran admits. “I guess that's where my problem lies, isn't it Lord? But how can I even want to love someone like her?" Fran exclaims.As she sits and thinks about that, Jesus says to her, “You can want to love her simply because you want to please me. I can help you love her. Why don’t you begin by praying for Marge every day?”“Pray for Marge every day?” Fran repeats. “Really—will that make a difference?”Jesus says, “It will make a difference in you, and that’s what is important.”So, Fran determines to pray for Marge as Jesus has challenged her. Now she begins to do the work she promised Marge tomorrow, working diligently to get it perfect, because Marge is very demanding.The next morning Fran is driving to work and praying for a lot of people, as she often does, and Marge comes to mind."I'd like to pray that lightning will strike her," Fran says with a grin, knowing she halfway means it. But she attempts to pray for her, "Dear Lord, please help Marge to see how obnoxious she is and change the way she treats me.” Her prayer bounces off the car ceiling; she knows it's the wrong prayer."Pray that Marge will change?” Jesus says to her. “That’s not exactly how you should pray for her, Fran.”“But Lord, she should change. Her behavior is awful," Fran defends herself.Her spirit is uneasy. Somehow, she has to get beyond this selfish kind of praying, even though Marge is difficult. She can’t change Marge; she can only change herself."Well, what should I pray?" Fran finally asks.And then she thought of something she heard on the radio—praying that she could see Marge the way God sees her. Praying for a new frame for Marge, a new way to see her, by putting her in a different frame."Put her in a different frame,” Fran thinks. “I guess I can do that, but she really is obnoxious.” As she drives along, she thinks about that further. “I guess I’ve had her in the obnoxious frame too long. Maybe I should pray for a new frame for Marge—a new way to look at her.”So, even though she feels a little foolish and not totally sincere, in obedience Fran starts her prayer again: "Dear Lord, please help me to see Marge the way you do. And please give me a new frame to put her in. There's got to be something good about her, Lord.
Presented by Lauren StibgenWhat relationship allows you to experience biblical grace? How do you give grace in relationships you have? How we show up and extend grace to others, especially at work, reflects how we experience grace from God. Remember, his power is made perfect in our weakness, so as we look at our relationships today, I am reminded of how weak I can be when it comes to showing others grace. I experience grace through the perfect relationship I have through my salvation in Jesus!If you lead people and even if you work on a team, every day can be an opportunity to reflect grace. If you missed our talk about anxiety, you may have missed the statistic that 25% of people report work as their number one stressor, and many of those stresses include their performance at work and even their relationships.Time and time again in Scripture we see Jesus model grace through serving others, love, and forgiveness. God’s number one goal is relationship with him, and he uses you and me and our reflection of Christ’s love to be fishers of men. He calls us to go forth and make disciples of all nations. We cannot do this if we are full of pride, judgement, and focused on ourselves.How do you serve, show love, and humility at work? Jesus served his disciples and showed great humility by washing their feet. He showed love by continually teaching them patiently. Jesus was others focused.One of my favorite examples of grace and love is between Peter and Jesus. Jesus knew Peter would deny him three times before his death. We see this in Luke 22. Peter denied his relationship with Jesus. We get a glimpse of how Peter felt when he “wept bitterly” when he realized he had denied Christ. Fast forward to Jesus and Peter walking along the shore after the resurrection, and Jesus asks Peter three times if he loves him. A reflection of the denial but asking for his love. His rebuke was gentle and grace filled, leading to the command for Peter to feed his sheep.Now, how can you show grace in your relationships at work?Is it by extending grace-filled words? Perhaps a compliment for something as simple as a well-written email or a comment made in a meeting.Is it by showing someone support for an idea they have? As a manager, you can truly show grace by highlighting the work of the people who report to you.Can you extend grace by giving someone honest feedback instead of choosing to gossip? Sometimes, it is best to say something to a person rather than about them.Maybe it is bringing a colleague a cup of coffee or inviting them to lunch.Is someone down? Are they facing a trial? Offer to pray.Relationships are of the utmost importance to God. He relies on us and our relationships to bring people into relationship with him.
Presented by Lauren StibgenDo you get overwhelmed by worry? With the busyness many of us experience balancing work, family, and other commitments we can be prone to worry and anxiety. One definition of worry is an incessant goading or attacking that drives one to desperation. Learning more about what God says about our anxiety, can help us rely more on his grace when we are feeling that overwhelming sense of worry. Common worries at work include: Missing a deadline. Worrying about being unliked by a colleague. Feeling imposter syndrome: you don’t really know what you are doing. Sounding “stupid” in a meeting for speaking up. Making a mistake.Twenty-five percent of people say work is the number one stressor in their life. These worries can be compounded by issues outside of work like parenting children, health, your marriage, or financial problems.While God calls us to work with excellence, working with all our hearts as for the Lord and not for human masters (Colossians 3:23), he also cautions us about worrying. And he calls us to look to him.Unemployment was running out and Sue still had not found a new job. Her husband was out of work as well. The bills weren’t stopping and anxiety was mounting.A surprising performance review: All the goals Amy had set with her boss were met and exceeded. Her mid-year pulse check was meeting expectations. Now, at year end she was suddenly rating needs improvement. Confusion and worry grew.What do these women have in common? Work created worry, which was compounded by other issues. They also had something else in common: a belief in the saving grace of Jesus Christ. While this didn’t take the worry away, their faith provided a means of grace during their trials.In Matthew 6, Jesus tells us to not be anxious about our life, reminding us that being anxious will not add a single hour to our span of life. Further, he calls us to look at how God provides in nature to remind us God loves and lavishes us much more than the birds or the grass of the field. We must first seek his kingdom and all of these things (food, clothing, our body) will be added to us.Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:6-7).These women were in prayer and in community with other women who were encouraging them. They were experiencing the grace of God through others who cared for their concerns and provided them comfort.Do you need to experience the grace of God in your anxiety? I would encourage you to seek the Lord in prayer and find a community to pray for you and encourage you.
Presented by Lauren StibgenThe soothing tongue is a tree of life, but a perverse tongue crushes the spirit (Proverbs 15:4).How should we have grace with our words? I find there are two ways we use our words negatively, especially when it comes to work. The first is self-talk, and the second is gossip. Neither extends grace, and both are rooted in sin apart from Christ.There are leading movements that promise to help us with positive self-talk. The words we use for ourselves can often be as harmful as the words we speak to and about others. I have found the words working women often use for themselves are borne of discouragement or on the opposite end of the spectrum, pride. Discouragement says “I am not enough, I will never get the promotion, or I won’t find a job.” Pride says, “I am better than, or she can’t.”Gossip and slander are pervasive in the workplace. More often than not, we find it is easier to remark about what isn’t going right or what someone isn’t doing than it is to celebrate someone’s success. Research shows 75-95% of gossip contains a morsel of truth. 96% of employees admit to engaging in gossip at work. A study about gossip shows more than 40 minutes per week are spent solely in gossip, and, yes, women are worse than men with close to 80% of women admitting to engaging in gossip. Noted consequences of gossip at work are lack of trust, jealousy, alienation, hurt feelings, and low morale.Being Christian doesn’t exclude us from this 96%. Remember, grace covers a multitude of sins, and maybe like me, you want to be better with your words both to yourself and about others.Ephesians 4:29 tells us to have no corrupting talk come from our mouths, but only such is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. Grace.What if we spent those 40 minutes building others up? If you work a typical week, that is eight minutes a day. Focused energy on speaking those morsels of truth to a person rather than about a person.Maybe you don’t gossip but spend time in negative self-talk. Spend those eight minutes with life giving affirmations about what Christ says of you.The tongue has the power of life and death. Repeatedly, the bible highlights how powerful our tongue is. In fact, in James 3:6, the tongue is described as a fire, and a world of evil among the parts of the body setting the whole course of one’s life on fire. No human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil.Words can give grace. Heavenly father, set a guard over my mouth, Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips (Psalm 141:3).
Presented by Lauren StibgenWell, it is one month into the new year, and like me, I am sure you have resolved to accomplish something in this new year. Surprisingly, only 38% of the population commits to a resolution. The most popular resolutions are in the areas of physical and mental health, followed by finances and social relationships. All these resolutions can be God-honoring, but the truth is sometimes our plans are not God’s plans. Proverbs 16:9 reminds me in their hearts, humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps. There are New and Old Testament examples of God impacting man’s plans.If we look at Paul’s journeys, we find while he often resolved to take his mission to a certain location, his efforts were frustrated. Whether house arrest or an unexpected shipwreck on Malta, Paul was forced to rely on God’s will for his missions.In the Old Testament, we saw both Moses and David never reaching their desired achievements. Moses was offered a glimpse of the promised land but never reached it. And David set forth to build a temple for the Lord, but God had other plans to use someone else in both stories to fulfill his plans.These are examples of huge goals. Maybe yours are just as big, or they are smaller, more incremental improvements you want to make.Resolutions can bring forth the temptation to rely on myself, rather than rely on God’s grace. Yesterday, we reflected on how God’s power is made perfect in our weakness.I want to challenge you to look to God to find grace in your time of need. Hebrews 4:16 exhorts us to approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.How can you seek the Lord in your resolutions? Knowing that you can’t do it alone, I would encourage you to pray about your resolutions and seek scripture that can encourage you when you feel like your resolutions are falling by the wayside. Ask God to show you his will for what you have resolved. Is this his plan for you?God will supply every need of yours to his riches and glory of Christ Jesus. His plans for you are for your good.Is it health you are seeking? Restored relationships? Better stewardship with your finances? Ask God for his grace as you approach his word with confidence.Lord, help our listeners today to be encouraged by your promises for their good, and give them mercy and grace in their time of need.For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline (2 Timothy 1:7).
Presented by Lauren StibgenThis notion of giving oneself grace spans well beyond any biblical consideration of what grace truly means. Our society tells us repeatedly to excuse our failings by resting in self-grace when we fail to meet our own expectations or the expectations of others.The truth is true grace is only experienced and extended by God. By grace we have been saved by faith alone. Grace is unmerited favor from God, and we cannot give that to ourselves. The only way we can apply grace to ourselves is to walk in the grace of God. In 2 Peter 3:18, we are exhorted to grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.Jesus says, my grace is sufficient for you, my power is made perfect in weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9). Paul remarks he can boast more gladly about his weakness so that Christ’s power can rest on him.Jesus covers us in grace. He alone is sufficient. By acknowledging we are sinners and saved by grace alone, we can focus on the example we have in Jesus. We cannot grow in our faith by looking at ourselves. It is in the fullness of this realization—grace comes through faith and Jesus is all sufficient—that we can show grace both to ourselves and others.When we truly stop and think about the need for grace, it is rooted in our sin. And we cannot ever forgive ourselves. Only Jesus can cover our sins. Sin has no dominion over us since we are not under the law but under grace. Romans 6:14 reminds us we are under grace—free favor—and that is what we experience through Jesus Christ alone.We have just started a new year. Oftentimes, we consider this time of renewal where we have set new expectations on ourselves, on our relationships, or even our work. A new fresh calendar. Maybe you are off to a great start, but maybe like Paul, you need to reflect and boast gladly in your weakness and inability to do it all alone.We cannot overcome our sin nature alone. We need Jesus. In every expectation set for ourselves or every moment we fail—which for me feels like daily. We must remember we must bring all of this to Jesus to experience grace.Not only do we experience grace but in acknowledging our weakness, Christ’s power rests on us. Grace=free favor=Jesus Christ=the power of Christ over my life.
Presented by Lauren StibgenMaybe you are a planner and a list maker. Or maybe you just let the days fly by with work, kids, social plans, and other things that fill your time to the point of depletion and exhaustion. Busy days can sometimes fly by, but we often don’t feel like we have accomplished much.We just finished a season, which to me, feels like the busiest time of the year that culminated with Christmas and the start of a new year. For me, this season was dizzying. Work was budgets, performance reviews, and year-end preparations. Home was preparing for the holidays, unexpected surgery for my daughter, and so many social commitments I don’t even want to recount them. Oh yes, and social events for my children and work parties. Add this to trying to maintain my own health and preparing to talk to you about experiencing grace through the sabbath. Don’t laugh. You are probably wondering if I observed the Sabbath rest in this season, or if I experience Sabbath rest at all.Seasons don’t matter. The reason I bring up the end of the year is only because it is fresh in our minds. Honestly, if I break down the weeks and months, there’s always something. A special project, a birthday, travel, board meetings, kids sports or other activities, and more social events. And the cycle repeats.What is even worse—we have social media to remind us of things we may be missing out on. News that needs our attention. Dings and pings to respond to. Email on our phones that comes along with us.There is a lot that drowns out God’s grace and his intention for us to experience this on the Sabbath.The truth is I haven’t always been great at observing the Sabbath, but that all changed when I was forced to stop, like all of us were, during the pandemic. When life started back to “normal” it felt good and bad all at the same time. Soon the pace was right back to where it was, and my seven days were booked and busy.The return to normal forced me to look closely at the Sabbath.God created rest.In Genesis 2:3 we first see the Sabbath. Then God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done. In Exodus, the Sabbath became a commandment. Remember the Sabbath day by keeping it holy (Exodus 20:8).The Hebrew word for Sabbath literally means “to cease.” If I never cease or take time away from the normal flow, how can I ever experience God? How can I hear him? I will bring us back again to the notion that God’s power is made perfect in our weakness. If we never allow ourselves to be vulnerable in faith, we will never know his goodness and be able to say, “God, I trust you to maintain control while I put all my focus on you.” Striving and not ceasing keeps the focus on me and what I can do, not on how God moves in my life.In Isaiah 58:11 we are beautifully reminded of how God provides for us. The Scripture says, The Lord will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail.How will I ever experience this guidance, satisfaction, strength, and watering that never fails if I don’t show my weakness and rest and reset?In the New Testament book of Hebrews, we see this repeated in chapter 4:9-10. There remains, then, a Sabbath-rest for the people of God; for anyone who enters God’s rest also rests from their works, just as God did from his.We rest just like God rested.Throughout the Bible, those who were closest to the Lord practiced rest. The prophets, King David, and even Jesus and the disciples rested.I often turn to Psalm 23:1-3, 5.The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.He makes me lie down in green pastures.He leads me beside still waters.He restores my soul.He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake.You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
I’ve been examining how we can do a better job connecting with people. First Peter 4:9 exhorts us to offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. How do we show hospitality to one another?Well, there are myriads of ways to do that, but it means you will have to see yourself as the host or hostess rather than the guest. Someone who shows hospitality takes on the responsibility to make others comfortable, to serve their needs, to initiate a welcoming environment, to make the first move. That could be in any situation—at home, at work, at church, while shopping or traveling, etc. Show hospitality to others.Sometimes it simply means taking time to recognize someone and greet them, calling them by name if possible. Sometimes it means interrupting your own plans to help someone out. It could mean inviting people to your home for a meal or taking time to listen to someone’s problem. It will require a servant attitude, a willingness to put others first, and truly connect with them.Peter says we are to show hospitality without grumbling. That tells me showing hospitality is not always easy to do. Putting others first requires an attitude that has to come from God’s power in us, not from our own selves. It’s possible to be hospitable with the wrong spirit—with a grumbling spirit.If you’re serious about connecting with others and fulfilling this hospitality challenge, you’ll need to pray about it. Pray God will give you both the desire and the power to want to connect with others, to expend the energy, time, and resources that will be required to put others first and die to your own selfish desires.Here’s the good news: When you learn to do this, you reap wonderful benefits. You discover dying to yourself brings new life, as Jesus promised. When we get ourselves out of the way and make it a daily practice to put others first, we move into that abundant life Jesus came to give us. It’s one of the paradoxes of the Christian life—that if we want to be the greatest, we must be a servant. By God’s grace and for his glory, that can become a reality in our lives.
Do you approach your relationships as a host or a guest? The attitude that helps is to think of yourself as the host or hostess rather than the guest. Or, in more biblical terms, as one who serves rather than one who is served.Think about your daily interactions with other people—at work, at home, or church, wherever. Are you a host or a guest? For example, do you initiate the phone call that needs to be made or do you wait for the other person to call? When you’re in a group, do you introduce yourself to someone new or wait for them to introduce themselves first? When someone seems puzzled or confused, do you offer to help?Maybe you’re thinking you can’t be the host or hostess because you’re shy or introverted. I want to encourage you to give it a try. It may take you out of your comfort zone temporarily, but once you take that first step to “host” your relationships, you’ll see that it really isn’t that scary, and before long you will be comfortable doing it. It will surprise you to see the positive reactions you receive, and you’ll feel very good about connecting with others in more meaningful ways.One of the reasons we hesitate to take the role of host or hostess in relationships is because we fear what others will think of us. I find when I am more concerned about how I will appear to others than I am about trying to connect with them, it’s because I am far too self-focused. I have to stop and remind myself it’s not all about me. I can assure you if you reach out to others in an attempt to connect in a better, more loving way, you will rarely make a fool of yourself. And what if you do? Does the world stop revolving? Does God stop loving you? We just have to get over our intense self-absorption.Another obstacle to connecting with others is our pride. How often do you hesitate to initiate a connection with someone new because you feel they should make the first move? If you find yourself thinking, “They should come to me,” it could be the indication of a proud attitude.Or maybe some of us hesitate to connect with others because it just takes too much effort. True, it does take effort and time, but the fruit of that effort is very rewarding.I hope you’ll consider your responsibility to be a host or hostess with the people in your life, rather than playing the role of the guest. It makes life so much richer and fulfills our God-given responsibility to do unto others as we would want them to do to us.
I’ve been challenging you to think of yourself as a host or hostess on your job and elsewhere, in order to connect with people better. To initiate conversations, volunteer help, keep your antenna up for anyone who needs a word of encouragement. This is how we show Christ’s love in a world that is starving for kindness and compassion.I remember someone giving a message challenging us to “leave it better than you found it.” Just imagine how much nicer our worlds would be if we all practiced that regularly—leaving everything better than we found it.Let’s take that principle and apply it to our relationships. What if our goal was to make certain every relationship we have of any significant length—like fifteen minutes or more—was to leave that person better than we found him or her? To do something for that person would add value to their lives. It might be a word of advice that we take time to share, or a listening ear, or a book we could recommend, or an invitation to lunch.You know, people don’t remember so much what we do or how well we do it, but they do remember how we made them feel. Have you ever thought about how you make other people feel? I’m sure you’ve thought about how other people make you feel. But reverse that and ask yourself, “How do I make other people feel?”Some people make us feel insignificant. Others intimidate us. Some people make us feel like failures. No doubt you can think of people in your life who give you those kinds of negative feelings. They may not intend to give off those vibes, but something in their manner or the way they treat you gives you that impression. Stop and ask yourself: Do I do that to others?I have learned I can send negative messages to others because of my tendency to be very project oriented and very focused on getting a job done. In the process, if I’m not careful, I can miss opportunities to recognize people along the way and send them an unintended message that they aren’t important to me. I’m working hard to change those bad habits, but I have to be very intentional about it and remember to catch myself and connect with all those people.What kind of messages do you send to others? Do they sense you are a caring person; do you exude an attitude of acceptance and warmth? Obviously, I’m aware we can’t please everyone, and people can choose to misinterpret us unfairly. But we also have a responsibility, as Paul wrote to the Corinthians, to take pains to do what is right, not only in the sight of God, but also in the sight of men (2 Corinthians 8:21).
I’m examining how we can improve our ability to connect with others. I challenged you to see yourself as the host or hostess, the one who is responsible to make others feel comfortable, who takes the initiative to meet their needs and help in any way possible. For some of you, that means moving outside your comfort zone, I’m sure, but it is a way to show love and caring for people around you, which is our calling as believers in Christ.Another important connection skill is to consider everyone significant, and to take the time to learn their names and call them by name. In your jobs and in your life, you will meet many people. Remember they are all significant to God, and therefore, they should be to you as well. Don’t overlook people. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you can do is smile and say hello.Often people in service jobs wear nametags: waiters, waitresses, cleaning people, doormen. Make it a practice to look for nametags and then call people by name. And if they don’t have a nametag, take the time to ask, “What is your name?” In a world that is often cold and uncaring, something as simple as calling a person by name can bring warmth and a touch of love into that relationship, brief as it may be.Some years ago, we began distributing magnetic nametags to all members and attenders at our church. What a difference that has made in helping us to connect with others at the church. People I’ve seen for years I now can connect with their name. It is truly amazing to see how much better we connect with each other simply because of those nametags—we can call each other by name.If you determine to have a mindset that you are the host or hostess, and it is your job to find common ground with others and make them feel at ease, you will discover you talk less about yourself and focus more on others. Paul wrote to the Philippians we should count others more significant than ourselves (Philippians 2:3). How do you do that? Well, you have to be very intentional about it and pray God will give you both the desire and the power to do it.It won’t always be easy. You’ll find with some people you have very little in common, but instead of giving up, look for that one thing that could open up a conversation and help you to connect.
One question I am often asked is, “What is the main issue people in the workplace are struggling with today?” I’ve been in this ministry for many years, so I’ve had enough time to observe common issues and note changes in the workplace. But I can tell you one issue remains at the top of most everyone’s list, and that is how to deal successfully with people!People! It’s people! In some form or another, our relationships—on the job and everywhere else—cause us more frustration, create more conflict, and eat up more of our time than anything else. Of course, relationships also can bring great joy and satisfaction, too.I want to address this relationship challenge by talking about how we connect successfully with others. You will notice there are some people who seem to have no difficulty forming friendships, generating loyalty, creating community, and getting along with people, while others are woefully lacking in these skills. What makes one person better at connecting with people than others? And if this ability to connect with people does not come naturally to us, is it possible to develop those skills and improve in those areas?Scripture exhorts us to count others more significant than ourselves (Philippians 2:3), and to exhibit the characteristics of a truly loving attitude toward others. We need to find practical and effective ways to develop these godly characteristics of connecting easily and quickly with other people, whether they are co-workers, managers, employees, or just friends and acquaintances.One of the first things we have to do to connect with others is to make people feel comfortable in our presence. And we can learn to do that by thinking of ourselves as “hosts” in any situation. A good host takes the initiative to make others feel comfortable. Most people view themselves as “guests” in life, expecting others to take the initiative and make the first move. But if you will just reverse that tendency and think of yourself as the host or hostess, you will become more proactive in initiating conversations, offering to help others, and discovering you are beginning to connect with people much more easily.I challenge you to be the “host” as you go to work; see yourself as the person who will initiate connections, who will have your antenna up to be aware of others around you and be willing to get out of your comfort zone and make the first move. It is such a simple idea, but I can promise you it will make a difference in how you connect with others.
How many times have we heard our pop culture say, “You’re perfect just as you are” or “God just wants you to be happy”? This week Mary Lowman and Alisa Childers help us navigate false ideas and Alisa shares from her book Live Your Truth and Other Lies. Join us as we discover how to stand against false beliefs as followers of Christ.
In his marvelous book, Knowing God, J. I. Packer says many church people "pay lip-service to the idea of grace, but there they stop. Their conception of grace is not so much debased as non-existent” (p. 116-117).I’ve been examining what it means to live a grace-full life, to truly understand God’s grace to us, which equips us to dispense grace to others. I find I must be intentional about living a grace-full life. I have to think about it, pray about it, and make choices each day that lead me to be a grace-full person.We’ve looked at the ABCs of graceful living this week: A – Abound in generosity, in good works. B – Live a bitter-less life. We must pull up those weeds of bitterness as soon as they start to grow, because bitterness chokes grace out of our lives. C - Learn to be content. Contentment is a trademark of a grace-full life.This is a good description of grace-full living, though not exhaustive. But where do we get this grace? We can’t find it in ourselves; we can’t obtain it through good works or trying harder.Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need (Hebrews 4:16).We find grace at the throne of God, which is a throne of grace. God is enthroned in grace. And the incredibly good news is we can approach the throne of grace with confidence. We can be absolutely confident we will be accepted there if we go in the righteousness of Jesus Christ. And we can be absolutely confident grace will be given to help us.Maybe, like me, you are not a terribly graceful person, but would you like to be a grace-full person—full of God’s grace, which you can give to others? It is available to anyone who will be intentional about living in the ABCs of God’s grace and making regular visits to the throne of grace.
We’re examining the ABCs of grace-full living and what it looks like to be a truly graceful person. As we have seen, A is abundant living, B is bitterless living, and today we look at C.C- ContentedGrace-full living is contented living. The dictionary says that a contented person is one who issatisfied with what they are and what they have; they want nothing more or anything else.Does that describe you? I have to tell you there are far too many days it does not describe me. I see a new house being built, and I think how nice it would be to have it. I peruse those catalogs that flood my mailbox, and I can convince myself I can’t live without something I saw in the catalog.And we can lose our contentment by wishing we were a different person, with a different life, in a different place, having different gifts and abilities. Ever go there?Living a discontented life will suck the grace of God right out of you. It will cause you to be restless, self-focused, resentful, envious.Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have because God has said, ‘Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you’ (Hebrews 13:5).This is something we must become intentional about doing. We have to work at it, if you please. We have to pray it into our lives. It doesn’t just happen.The enemy of your soul will trip you up with discontent if you give him the opportunity. He knows a discontented Christian is not going to dispense grace. He whispers those lies to you, convincing you your life cannot be complete or full or good unless you have something or someone that you don’t now have.But we can learn contentment. The Apostle Paul wrote:I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want (Philippians 4:12).Contented living is freedom—and it is grace-full living.
What does it mean to live a life that is full of God’s grace—a truly grace-full life? We’re looking at the ABCs of graceful living, and yesterday we saw A is abundant living. The abundance Jesus came to give us is abundant joy and peace, and that should overflow into abundant good works.B- BitterlessGrace-full living is living without bitterness. Consider this passage from Hebrews:See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many (Hebrews 12:15).Allowing bitter roots to grow in your heart will cause you to miss the grace-full life. There are many bitter roots that can become ingrained in the garden of our hearts. Consider these: The bitter root of rejectionIt’s very easy to allow the pain of rejection to take root in your heart and bloom into bitterness. The bitter root of unfulfilled dreamsUnfulfilled dreams create a fertile ground for bitter roots. The bitter root of lossWhat have you lost lately? Your job? Your pride? Has death robbed you of a loved one? Or divorce? Loss makes us vulnerable to bitterness.This verse teaches us several things about bitter roots:First, they grow. You can't hold onto one little bitter twig. It won't stay that size. It always grows.Second, they cause trouble. Any little bitterness will cause you trouble. A great many of the emotional and mental breakdowns we see today have their beginnings in bitterness that was never dealt with.Third, they defile many. Bitterness spills over to everyone around you. As parents we can transfer that bitter spirit to our children; as managers and employees we can transfer it to our co-workers. It is a poison that affects everyone it touches.If you’re struggling with some bitterness today, I pray you will ask God to help you dig up those bitter roots so you can enjoy the grace-full life Jesus came to give you.
The song, Amazing Grace, is sung all over the world by people who have no understanding of its message of salvation through Jesus. But the idea of grace appeals to everyone.What does it mean for you and me in our world today to live grace-full lives? What does that look like? I’d like to give you the ABCs of grace-full living. Here is “A”:A- AbundantJesus said: “I have come that they may have life and have it to the full.” Jesus wasn’t talking about being full of money, or earthly success, or freedom from problems. He was talking about a life that is grace-full!In 2 Corinthians 9:8 we read: And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work. When the grace of God fills us, then it must flow out to others in the form of good works. What good works? The good works that you were created to do. Ephesians 2:10 says: We are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.Here are a few examples of how we dispense grace to others: Someone is sick; you minister to their needs. Someone is rejoicing over good news; you rejoice with them. Someone has a broken heart. You cry with them, listen to them, console them. Someone is wandering away from God. You confront them in love, admonish them, help them to come back into fellowship. Someone is lost in sin, without Christ. You share the gospel in every way you can, lovingly planting seeds of truth in their life. Someone needs financial help. You give out of love and concern. You teach the Word of God in a small group; you organize prayer for your company; you begin a Bible study at work or at home; you invite others to hear the Word of God.These are just a few ways that we overflow with grace to others, abounding in good works.I can testify to you from personal experience that grace-full living is knowing God is using you in the lives of others. There is nothing more fulfilling than that.
I have to admit I am not a graceful person. In my first year of college, during Christmas break, my mother lined me up for private lessons with a woman who coached me on how to be graceful. Now, for my mother to spend money on such lessons was an indication of how much help I needed! I was not then—still am not to this day—graceful.This woman tried hard to make me more graceful, but unfortunately, I am like a bull in a china shop. If it can be bumped into, I bump into it. If it is fragile, I break it. If it can be tripped over, I trip over it. I’ve come to the conclusion if you’re not naturally a graceful person, there’s just not a whole lot you can do about it.I’m happy to report to you that though I may never be graceful, I can be grace-full—full of grace. That is not contingent on my agility or nimbleness or any physical attributes. It is, instead, contingent on my openness to the grace of God and my willingness to let it fill my life.In writing of our Savior, John says,The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth (John 1:14).Jesus was full of grace. As believers in Jesus Christ, you and I are in the process of being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory. We are to be filled with his Spirit, and therefore, we have the incredible opportunity to be filled with grace. Like Jesus, we can be full of grace.When asked what was the one thing about Christianity that sets it apart from all other religions, C. S. Lewis responded, “Oh, that’s easy. It’s grace.” No other religion offers God’s love and redemption coming to us free of charge, as a gift, no strings attached, no performance required, no standards to meet. Only Christianity dares to make God’s love unconditional. That’s because Christianity has the only qualified Savior, Jesus Christ.This week I want to encourage you to become very intentional about becoming a woman—or a man—who is grace-full, full of God’s grace. It must become more than a cliché, more than words we say or songs we sing. God’s grace needs to permeate every corner of our being so that we are living examples of his grace.
Join Mary Lowman and Alisa Childers as they converse about how historic Christianity can stand up to all our doubts and criticism. Among other things, Alisa is the author of the best-selling book Another Gospel? In their conversation, they talk about her book, progressive Christianity, and how to strengthen our own faith in our ever-changing world. I know you’ll be encouraged and challenged, so please join us.
How can you start living in grace? First and foremost, you have to give up! Yes, give up: Trying to earn God’s grace. You can’t! It’s a gift! Trying to make up for your past. It’s behind you! God remembers it against you no more. Trying to shift the blame—on your parents, on your siblings, on your mate, on your circumstances—whoever or whatever. Forgive whoever needs forgiving and let go of the bitterness and anger that is eating you alive. Sitting on the sidelines. Whatever fear is immobilizing you, believe God’s grace is sufficient to enable you to do the good works he put you here to do. Any known addiction in your life—anything that is keeping you in bondage.Give up and then give in! Give in: To God’s love for you. You are the one he loves. Nothing can separate you from his love. It’s unconditional—unlike any other love you’ve known. To God’s plan for you. Believe he has good works for you to do and tell God you want to do them. Tell God you’re tired of everything always being about you, and you want your life to be all about God. To God’s grace! Start immersing yourself in the grace of God. Search scripture about God’s grace and pray those scriptures into your life. To the joy of your salvation. If you’re sure you have been born from above, ask God to restore your joy as you learn to bask in his grace. To the abundant life Jesus died to give you. Stop settling for just getting by. Ask God to overflow your heart and mind with the truth of his grace to you, and then go for it.I want to leave you with a picture of you covered with grace! Grace follows you everywhere! Grace fills your heart! Grace comes out of your mouth. Grace gets you through the tough times. You have met grace, and you are growing in the knowledge and understanding of grace:But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. To him be glory both now and forever! Amen (2 Peter 3:18).You’ve met Grace! Get to know her better and better every day. Pray Grace into your life. Rebuke the enemy who will try to dump guilt and anger and shame and bitterness on you. Say hello to Grace all through your day. Fix your mind on Jesus, the one who is full of grace.
If you have indeed become a child of God through God’s saving grace, then the next question is, are you living your life in the reality of God’s grace?And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work (2 Corinthians 9:8).How much grace can abound toward you? All! How sufficient can you be? All! How many areas of your life can you have this all-sufficient grace? All! How many good works can you then do? An abundance! An abundance of what? Grace! For what? Every good work.God pours out all grace on you so you can be sufficient in all the things he puts in your life and therefore you will do many good works—an abundance of good works. God put you here to do good works:For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do (Ephesians 2:10).You have to meet Grace before you do the good works. Otherwise, you will keep trying to do the good works on your own, to win God’s favor or feel good about yourself or check off the boxes so you can say, “Look, I did it.” God gives you grace upon grace—all grace, for everything, an abundance—and then you have the privilege and joy of doing the good works, being the person God created you to be, knowing the fulfillment is yours as a child of the king.But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace to me was not without effect. No, I worked harder than all of them—yet not I, but the grace of God that was with me (1 Corinthians 15:10).You do the good works God intended you to do because you’ve met grace, and that grace was not in vain! You work hard to do the good works because God’s grace is with you.Have you been missing some of God’s grace? Why? Can you put a finger on it? If so, what do you do to turn around and start living in grace?
If you are not truly aware of grace in your life minute by minute, day by day, maybe it’s because your experience of grace is warped.For example, could it be:Do you see grace through your relationship with your parents or other authority figures?Maybe they set high expectations for you, and you never received their approval. Or perhaps you received very little attention; or one parent deserted you. As a result of one of more of these factors, your experience of “grace” fell very short of what it should have been.Do you see grace through your past?You think you don’t measure up; you’re not smart or gifted. You’ve messed up too much, failed God too often. As a result, you have lots of guilt. Perhaps you’ve become cynical, feeling hopeless about any possibility of things changing.If you’ve been looking at grace through the wrong lens, one of these or some other one, God’s grace has probably always seemed distant for you or it’s a mystery to you. And this probably reveals itself in one of several ways: You are always in performance mode, trying to secure God’s and others’ approval by being good, excelling in everything. Always trying to show yourself and others you’re okay, but it’s never enough. You have given up trying to find the grace you need, so you just sit on the sidelines and admire others, all the time blaming yourself. In fear of failure, you never step out on faith to do the good works God has called you to do.You haven’t met grace yet—not totally, not completely.You who are trying to be justified by the law have been alienated from Christ; you have fallen away from grace (Galatians 5:4).
Grace is your ticket to heaven, and grace is sufficient for your every need on your journey there. But this is just the beginning.We read:Out of his fullness we have all received grace in place of grace already given (John 1:16).Jesus is full of grace:The word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth (John 1:14).Is there a limit to his grace? None, never! And from his grace, you, as his child, have received grace upon grace. Unending grace. Immeasurable grace.The question I want to put to you is: Are you living in the fullness of the grace of Jesus? Is God’s grace—amazing grace—a conscious part of your everyday life? Having been born again through grace, have you missed the abundant grace upon grace for your life? Or maybe, like me, you live in it some days and some days you don’t.God is able and willing to give you grace upon grace. Grace to do every good work he has planned for you to do. Grace to endure whatever circumstances come your way. Grace to love like Jesus loves; to care like Jesus cares; to serve like Jesus served; to forgive like Jesus forgave. All grace is God’s gift to you. He is able to do that, provided you don’t miss it. Provided you don’t “fall short of his grace.”See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many (Hebrews 12:15).“See to it” says the writer to the Hebrews. Get to know grace better. See to it you don’t miss out on God’s abundant, amazing grace he gives to you—grace upon grace for every day and every situation in your life.
I want to introduce you to Grace. You may have met her before; I’m sure you have. But maybe you just haven’t gotten to know her too well yet. She is amazing grace. What makes her so amazing?First and most importantly, grace is your ticket to heaven.For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—not by works, so that no one can boast (Ephesians 2:8-9).Your good works won’t get you there. The fact you’re better than lots of other people doesn’t count. If and when you place your trust in Jesus Christ, confess your sins, and believe in your heart he is the way—and the only way—to know God, then God gives you a ticket. It’s a one-way ticket that guarantees you will spend eternity with him in heaven, and that ticket is grace. You can’t buy this ticket; it’s free, and it’s the only way you can get there.Secondly, grace is sufficient for every need you will have while on your way to Heaven.But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness” (2 Corinthians 12:9).The Apostle Paul is referring here to a “thorn in his flesh,” he called it. Three times he prayed for God to take it away—make his life easier, make him more effective in serving Jesus. Take away this thorn, Lord! It seemed like the obvious solution to his problem.Instead, God said to him, “My grace is sufficient for you.” My grace is all you need. My power comes through perfectly in your weakness.What have you prayed for God to fix—to make right, to solve—and he hasn’t done it yet? Maybe he will—in his own timing—or maybe not. But this much I can guarantee you, if you are born from above through faith in Jesus Christ, God’s amazing grace will be enough for you. God’s power will come through in ways you can’t even imagine.When you admit you are weak and helpless, grace comes through.
Presented by Lisa BishopAs we get started in talking about grace, I want to take you back to a hot summer day in the mid-80’s as I was entering my mid-teen years. I still get flashbacks from my spiral permed hair that blew away all height restrictions with the backcombing and amount of Aqua Net hairspray I used, but I digress. On this particular summer day, I was in the driveway of my childhood home, excited to wash my dad’s 1979 Oldsmobile. Now I know that may sound weird, actually enjoying washing a car, but for a little bit of backstory, my dad loved cars. Growing up, I would see him take meticulous care of them by washing and waxing them on a pretty regular basis. A clean car made my dad really happy. So, I was eager to get out my bucket of soapy water and pull out the long green garden hose to make the boxy, brown, five-seater, top-of-the-line car shine.I didn’t have my driver’s license yet and had never driven, let alone been behind the wheel of a car. So, my dad pulled the car out of the garage and parked it in the driveway for me to wash while he did some gardening in the backyard.There I was, lathering up my dad’s Oldsmobile, rinsing it off, and using old bath towels to dry it until it glimmered. I was so proud and even happier to know this was something that would mean a lot to my dad. To impress my dad a bit more, I thought it would be cool if I not only washed the car, but I parked it all by myself in the garage. Now mind you, on the other side of the garage was my dad’s prized possession, a 1969 Firebird convertible. Gold, with a white top, in mint condition, and perfectly polished. You can see where this story is heading.I got behind the wheel of this brown boat of a car, aiming to park it in the garage when instead, I nervously drove it into the left side of the garage door. In a panic, my foot hit the gas, and I swerved to the right. I had managed not only to dent the right side of the car, but also to side swipe my dad’s precious convertible.I know you are probably wondering, “What were you thinking?” Well evidently, I was not thinking clearly. At that point, I was completely freaked out and scared to death to tell my dad what had happened. I was worried he would be really mad at me.In my hysteria, I found my mom. When—in the midst of hyperventilating—I told her what had happened, she said, “Don’t worry! Everything will be just fine.” And we proceeded to walk to the backyard together to tell my dad. When I told him what happened I will never forget what he said. “I love you, Lisa. It’s just a car. We can get it fixed. You are more important to me than a car.” In that moment I expected to get what I deserved—a tongue lashing for my carelessness and a life sentence to my bedroom. But that’s not what I received at all. Instead, I was the recipient of something powerful. The powerful and impactful gift of grace.The grace my dad extended to me that day did something to my mind and heart that forever left an impression. It taught me, amongst many things, to value people over possessions. My dad’s selfless act was based on his character. He saw how fearful and upset I was, and he chose to respond with mercy and kindness rather than erupt and be rash with his words. When he could have punished me, instead he lavished me with love.The concept of grace can be hard to grasp but it was made tangible on that hot summer day in 1984.Ephesians 1:3-8 tells us about the grace that has been given to us in Christ.Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ. For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will— to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves. In him we have redemption through his blood,
presented by Lisa BishopWhen was the last time you received a letter in the mail? I’m not talking about a letter from the city outlining your parking violation or a dreaded collection notice. I’m talking about a heart-felt, handwritten letter from a friend or loved one. It’s so rare these days to get anything but junk mail, isn’t it?Over the past month I’ve been reading the New Testament. As I was reading the Apostle Paul’s letters, I noticed he opens each letter with some form of the following greeting. Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.Have you ever stopped to think about what Paul means when he addresses the recipients of his letters with those words? It must be important since Paul used grace and peace as common greetings. He is reminding all who are in Christ Jesus we are recipients of free, undeserved, and unearned mercy from God through Jesus. Along with God’s kindness and compassion, peace is also ours in Christ and is a fruit of the Holy Spirit. Paul is reminding us of who God is, and as we receive grace and peace, we are to release grace and peace to everyone around us.We can often blow past Paul’s poignantly penned greeting and miss its meaning. David Guzik, an author and Bible commentator, says this about Paul’s words. “...Grace means, among other things, that God's attitude towards us is gracious, it's filled with favor. You see, when God sees us, …he sees beauty in us because we're in Jesus. To put it plainly, standing in grace means that God doesn't only love us, He likes us. It can be difficult for us to understand that God likes us, that he's well pleased with us in Jesus. We often suffer under the thought that God barely tolerates us because we're unworthy, or that, most of the time, God is irritated with us. You see, we're so familiar with our own sins and shortcomings we are easily convinced that God is always half-angry with us, and he's always disappointed in us because we're unworthy.“Brothers and sisters,…your position before God is a standing of favor,…not one of unworthiness or irritation or mere toleration…Your standing in grace is only because of God's freely given favor in Jesus Christ.”[1]Don’t you just love that reminder?As we wrap up our week together, receive this blessing.Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. And as you have received God’s grace, go and be grace in the workplace.[1] Guzik, D. (2018, January 12). Part 3 - What Does Living in Grace Look Like? by David Guzik. Blue Letter Bible. https://www.blueletterbible.org/Comm/guzik_david/GettingGrace/GettingGrace/Part-3-What-Does-Living-in-Grace-Look-Like.cfm
presented by Lisa BishopIf you were to take inventory of your words over the past 48 hours, would you describe them as grace-filled?We are given instructions to:Never let ugly or hateful words come from your mouth, but instead let your words become beautiful gifts that encourage others; do this by speaking words of grace to help them (Ephesians 4:29).Other versions say, let no unwholesome words come from your mouth, which means words that are rotten, corrupted, of poor quality are worthless. That is a strong warning, and one we can be prone to bypass, especially when we get caught up in office dynamics.One of the most impactful ways to show God’s grace in your workplace is by filtering your words through the Holy Spirit before they fly out of your mouth. When people around you are grumbling and complaining about their work or their boss, talking poorly behind a coworker’s back, or speaking in a crude or insensitive way, you’ve got a secret weapon, and that weapon is grace.And when I say weapon, I do not mean it in the harmful sense but in the powerful godly sense. The words should flow from your mouth and cultivate a healthy workplace culture. You may think you do not have much influence to impact a culture, but you do. Your words will either sow beauty that builds up and encourages, or they will be careless and tear down, discourage, and disparage others. Words that lack any sense of grace destroy harmony and collaboration.Are your words beautiful gifts or atomic bombs? Do they bolster connection or are they like a termite slowly eating away at the structure of your relationships?You’ve heard the phrase, “Think before you speak.” Before words roll off your tongue, put them through the THINK filter.Are your words:T—Tested? (meaning put through the test of grace)H—Helpful?I—Inspiring?N—Necessary?K—Kind?If someone were to hear your words or eavesdrop on your conversation, would they get a proper representation of Jesus? Would they hear words of grace falling from your lips? Let’s commit together to THINK before we speak and let our words be a gift of grace to those who hear them.
presented by Lisa BishopI am examining ways to be grace in the workplace and learning about an aspect of grace—humility.To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everyone else, Jesus told this parable: “Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other people—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’ But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’ I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted” (Luke 18:9-14).Have you ever uttered the words of the Pharisee, “God, I thank you I am not like other people. I thank you I am not like my coworker! She’s so loud. He’s so lazy. She is so incompetent.”I have, and if you’re honest, you have too, even if you have whispered them silently to yourself. Because of our sin nature, we are prone to fall into the temptation of a self-elevating view that looks down on other people. We boast of the reasons we are better than others and we neglect our own shortcomings. Or worse, we put insufficiencies on a spectrum, and it just so happens our own faults are minimized while others’ faults are often put on blast.God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble (James 4:6).When you humble yourself, first before God, you get oodles of grace.When it comes to being justified before God, we see the Pharisee listing the reasons he deserved God’s favor, but no amount of self-effort will earn you the grace of God. God cannot be bought or manipulated. That is good news because you and I will fall short, and Jesus fills the gap! The next time you are tempted to think more highly of yourself and less of others, remember you are loved. Thank God for his grace and humble yourself.
presented by Lisa BishopAre you a fool?Fools show their annoyance at once, but the prudent overlook an insult (Proverbs 12:16).If you have ever found yourself in a situation where your reputation was on the line or your competence was called into question based on something a coworker said about you, Proverbs provides solid wisdom on how to respond. It’s easy to react with retaliation or revenge when you are wronged, but Proverbs reminds us to respond to others with grace. Rather than being hot-headed and reactive, or maybe even silently vindictive, take a deep breath and hold back any rash words. Instead of responding harshly, or in a manner you may regret, keep a calm spirit.When you are prudent, you are careful and wise, exercising good judgment in handling the injury done to you. When you act prudently, you create less trouble for yourself and in turn gain more credit and a good reputation from others.Now, I am not saying you need to roll over and be walked on as false information is spoken about you, but when you exert wisdom and respond gracefully, you are a witness to the grace of Jesus.It reminds me of Paul’s instructions:Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone (Colossians 4:5-6).When you are insulted, your response is a witness to Jesus Christ. And when you don’t react in a way people typically behave when maligned and instead you act with kindness and courtesy, you create an opening for conversation that can lead to sharing your faith. You are able to give an answer, a reason for your spirit-led response.The next time you are bad-mouthed, ground yourself in the Holy Spirit and ask him to cover your comeback with grace. Respond in the Spirit and ask, “What would grace do?”
presented by Lisa BishopI am examining an important characteristic of God we can often find difficult to emulate. Grace. And specifically, we’ll be unpacking ways to be grace in the workplace.Notice how I said “be” grace. Grace ultimately flows from your identity, and when you are truly living from your identity in Jesus, grace will inform how you act, speak, and live. Just as an aspect of God’s character is grace, you and I are called to imitate Jesus and be grace to others.We see grace as a constant theme in the Bible. In the Old Testament we hear the very words of God as he declares his character:The Lord, the Lord, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, maintaining love to thousands, and forgiving wickedness, rebellion, and sin (Exodus 34:6-7).The word translated gracious means merciful in Hebrew. In the New Testament, grace translated from the Greek word charis, means favor, blessing, or kindness. The most powerful demonstration of grace is God choosing to bless us in Jesus rather than penalize us when we sin and fall short of his glory. You have probably heard of grace defined as unmerited favor. Meaning, regardless of your behavior, God chooses to love you. I am so grateful for God’s grace, aren’t you?Who is someone in your workplace you find hard to extend grace to? A coworker you find it difficult to love and show kindness toward? We often find it most challenging to act in a gracious manner with people who have different opinions than us or act in ways we find off-putting. But as an ambassador of Christ, you are called to love and be good-natured toward everyone, to live from grace because you have been given grace.When you live from a place of grace, fully known and fully loved, even with all your flaws, you will be more inclined to have a posture of grace with others.The next time a coworker does something that gets on your nerves or says something that gets under your skin, rather than reacting in the flesh, ask yourself, “How will I be grace in the workplace?”
When I think back over my life, there are many things I would like to change. I would like to make better choices and decisions, make smarter moves, manage my money better, use my time more wisely—oh, there are many things I could have done so much better.But mostly, when I think back over my life, I would like to avoid the sins of my past, the times when I wandered far away from God, the things I did in disobedience to him. I would like to erase those things I did which brought dishonor to his name; those times when I was a poor witness for Jesus Christ and a poor representative of the Kingdom of God.But, of course, there is nothing to be gained by brooding over the past. Yesterday is gone; tomorrow is only a promise. The only thing you and I have is today. So, if we don’t want to have any more regrets to look back on in the future, then we must set our minds and hearts to begin today anew.How do we do that? Well, the first thing and the most important thing is to make certain that you’ve been made a new creation in Christ. That’s where all new beginnings have their start, and without that transformation inside of us, any new beginnings we will attempt will be short-lived and futile.The Bible says that when you become a new creation in Christ Jesus, the old has gone and the new has come (2 Corinthians 5:17). It’s the most wonderful new beginning anyone can ever have. It’s that moment when you pass from death to life—when you are no longer under God’s condemnation because your sins are forgiven, and your eternal destiny is assured.Maybe you have not yet had that new beginning. If I could sit down and talk with you personally, could you tell me of the time when you recognized your sinful condition, realized you could do nothing about it yourself, and came to God through Christ in humility to ask for forgiveness of all your past sins? Do you know that you’ve been born again, because Jesus told us that we must be born again in order to be a part of his Kingdom?You see, many people today have the wrong idea of what it means to be a Christian. They think it means trying to be a good person, doing good deeds, going to church, being baptized, doing more good things than bad things, and so forth. They are trying to earn their way to heaven by doing good things and being a good person.But here’s the truth, as the Bible tells us. None of us is righteous in ourselves, and not one of us can be good enough to meet God’s requirements for holiness. Therefore, on our own merit we cannot become a new person; we cannot have this new beginning.That sounds pretty helpless and hopeless, until you realize what Jesus Christ has done for you in order to rectify your dilemma. He came as the perfect Son of God, died in order to pay the penalty for your sin, and rose again from the dead, in order to purchase for you and me eternal life. God’s righteous requirements have been met in Jesus, and we are given the opportunity to accept his payment for our sins.The Bible says that “God made him (Jesus) who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God” (2 Corinthians 5:21). Jesus took your place and mine as a sacrifice for our sins, so that we could have his righteousness and therefore be acceptable to God. But this free gift of righteousness has to be accepted and believed.Have you ever done that? If not, then that’s the new beginning that you need today. Nothing else matters as much as making certain that you’ve had this new beginning in Christ, because this determines where you will spend all of eternity—in heaven or in hell. If you have not yet accepted Jesus as the Savior and Lord of your life, you can do that right now. There’s no reason to wait. Just pray right where you are, right now, that God will forgive you of all your sins and give you the righteousness of Jesus Christ.We’ll be glad to send you more information from God’s Word about this new beginning in Christ ...
What does it mean to practice The Ministry of Presence? God is showing me more and more how to practice being there for people.For example, often when I am praying for someone or thinking about them, a thought will come into my mind about what I could do to be there for that person. I’ve learned that when those kinds of ideas come into my mind, it’s most likely placed there by the Holy Spirit, and therefore I should pay attention. So, many times I pause right then and write a note or make a call or add something to my to-do list to remind me to do something for that person that will simply let them know I’m thinking about them, and I care.I have a friend who is struggling with a health issue. Obviously, I can’t do anything to help her resolve that issue, but I can let her know that I’m thinking about her and praying for her. Just to say that to someone, whether in person, on the phone, or by written word, is an example of practicing the ministry of presence.Inviting someone to your home for no reason except to let them be with you is an example of practicing the ministry of presence. This past Thanksgiving two people who didn’t have close-by family were with us at my daughter’s home, sharing that meal with us, and it was an expression of care and concern to them, though we never spoke those words. Their invitation to be with us was the ministry extended to them that day, and it was a delight to have them with us.I told you about my friends who are extending this ministry to homeless people around their home in Chicago. I don’t think I’ll ever forget what one of them said to my friend, Justin. The homeless man said that in spite of the fact that he was always told he was worthless, he now knew that wasn’t true. If he were worthless, my friend would not hang out with him.The ministry of presence is hanging out with someone, even if it might be inconvenient or push you out of your comfort zone. Who is it in your life that would love for you to “hang out” with them? Are you willing to answer the call of Jesus to show his love through the ministry of your presence?
I’ve recently been introduced to this new terminology—the ministry of presence—but actually it’s not a new ministry at all. It’s exactly what Jesus has commissioned us to do, all of us who are Christ-followers, to be present in the lives of others. Simply to be there.Everyone in the body of Christ is qualified for this ministry. You do not have to be brilliant, persuasive, articulate, or experienced. You do not have to be anything but available to be a wonderful tool in the hand of God. In fact, often the ministry of presence is a ministry without words.You know, sometimes we use the Bible as though it were a band-aid. We stick a favorite verse on others who are suffering, and feel we’ve really helped them. But just as physical injuries take time to heal, emotional injuries do as well. True, when people are suffering, they need the truth of Scripture to help them heal, but sometimes they just need it demonstrated in your actions rather than in your words. Your presence can communicate what your words will never be able to say.And keep in mind, when you’re with someone who is hurting, you don’t need to have answers. Often, I say to someone in pain, “I cannot explain this. I don’t know why this has happened.” That’s not terribly profound, but it’s often just simply the truth. So, when someone is really struggling with why something hurtful has happened to them, trying to come up with an explanation usually just makes them feel worse. Just be there; just give them the ministry of your presence without answers.Someone has said that you and I cannot eliminate someone’s grief or sorrow, but we can share it and that will lighten their load. True believers, mature Christians grieve. Jesus did, and we will, too. We can’t stop it with words, but we can lighten it by our presence.Are you available today for the ministry of presence? I believe if you are, God will give you an opportunity today to simply be there for someone.
I want to ask you a question: Where would you be today if you didn’t have people in your life who are simply there for you? I can tell you that God has blessed me with some dear people throughout my life who have always been there for me. People who cry with me and laugh with me, who share my burdens and my joys. Their presence in my life has made an incredible difference. I can’t imagine where I’d be without them.That’s what I’m talking about this week—the ministry of presence. The incredible value there is in simply being there for others. When we become Christ-followers, we are commissioned by Jesus to serve others. After he washed the disciples’ feet at the Last Supper, Jesus said that he had given them an example of how they were to serve each other.The ministry of presence is about being a servant—putting others’ needs ahead of your own. Jesus calls us to come alongside others and become a part of their lives. As Christians, we fulfill the law of Jesus by being present with people. It means we will serve people even when it might make us uncomfortable. It means we stand with people in the midst of their anxiety and fear, in their difficult times.I’m truly challenging you and myself this week to take this ministry seriously. To actually ask God to show us what person in our lives needs our presence—simply needs us to be there for them.For example, let’s say you work with a person who is going through something emotionally difficult—maybe a divorce or a recent death in their family. I find that when people are in these kinds of traumatic situations, they simply want a listening ear. Could you invite that person to lunch or coffee and simply listen? Not on company time, of course, but at a time and in a place that is appropriate, to be truly present with them, giving them your undivided attention.Or could it be that there is someone very close to you—a mate or daughter or sibling—who needs to know that you’re not too busy to spend time with them? I think sometimes we can fail to see that those nearest to us need our presence—our total attention to them and whatever issues they’re facing.You may have decided that you don’t have certain gifts or abilities, and you devalue the contribution you can make in the lives of others. I’m here to tell you today that if you are a Christ-follower, you are totally capable and qualified to have the ministry of presence. It’s just a matter of becoming intentional about doing it.
Do you know what the ministry of presence is? This is a ministry every Christ-follower should take seriously, and every one of us is qualified and equipped for this ministry.Galatians 6:2 describes it this way: Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. That is an important part of this ministry of presence—simply being there for others, carrying their burdens, sharing their sorrows, as well as increasing their joys by our presence. This is the fulfillment of the law of Christ, the teaching of Jesus. This is the new commandment Jesus has given us, and it should be a hallmark of our lives as Christ-followers.So, what I want to ask you today is: What person in your life right now could use your presence? What person needs to know that someone cares and hasn’t forgotten them? Stop right now, if you can, and let God’s Spirit reveal that person to you. Perhaps a name popped right into your mind; if not, ask God to reveal that person to you. It may be someone very close to you, a relative or close friend; or it may be someone you just met. Or could it be a stranger you haven’t met but who is somehow in your life—the beggar on the street or your next-door neighbor?Recently God has made it clear to me that I need to do a better job of staying in touch regularly with some dear single women who have gone as missionaries to foreign countries. I’ve visited many of them, and I know how lonely and tough their lives can be. I know that they need the ministry of presence. They don’t necessarily need to read my books or listen to my talks; they simply need to know that I have not forgotten them, and I can be present in their lives by way of the internet.The ministry of presence is not hard to do. You don’t need a degree from a Bible school to do it; you don’t need to be able to quote Scripture or teach a Bible study lesson to be qualified. You simply need to make a commitment to be present in a person’s life; just be there for them, and by your presence you will communicate God’s love. That’s what people need more than anything else.
Not long ago I was introduced to a new term: the ministry of presence. A young couple in our church had begun a ministry to the homeless people they encounter on the streets of Chicago around where they live. It began simply by reaching out to one or two, talking to them, inviting them to church, providing Sunday lunch for them, and it grew to over 60 homeless people they served every weekend.I love their story because it’s such a clear example of what Jesus would do. Jesus would see the needs on his doorstep, as Justin and Tara did, and he would start helping them in any way he could. In telling us their story, Justin said that he has come to understand what The Ministry of Presence means. He made it a habit to invite one of his homeless friends to run errands with him, when possible, which he did one day. As they made rounds that day, the homeless man said to him, “All my life I’ve been told I am worthless and no good, but I don’t believe that anymore.” Justin asked him why, and he said, “Because if I was worthless, you wouldn’t hang out with me.”Justin’s willingness to simply be with this man gave him a new understanding of his worth as a person. Justin went on to say that what homeless people need more than anything else is not money or food, but it is a relationship—someone to simply be with them and care about them.You know, that’s true of most of us, isn’t it? You and I need other people in our lives just to validate our worth. Can you imagine how you would feel if you believed that other people did not want to be with you? The ministry of presence is real—and it’s just what Jesus would do—what he did do when he was on earth. Think of the many stories in the Gospels where Jesus was just “hanging out” with people—some of whom were considered undesirable. There was Zacchaeus and Mary Magdalene and the woman who anointed him with oil, to mention just a few.This is one ministry you can embrace—the ministry of presence. You and I can simply choose to be present in the lives of people who need to know they are loved by us and by God. You don’t have to preach or teach or solve their problems; you just need to be there for them and then see what God will do through you.
For forty years now God has given me the unbelievable opportunity to talk to you by radio and encourage you to believe that God's Word is relevant to every need of your life. Quite frankly, no one is more surprised than I am to discover that our programs are now broadcast on over 400 stations and outlets across the nation and internationally. I never ever would have guessed that God could or would allow me such privileges.You see, I really blew it big time. After being raised in a wonderful Christian home and accepting Jesus into my life at an early age, after a Christian education and good churches all my life, after much Bible teaching and knowledge, I chose to put God on the back seat of my life and do my own thing, as we say. And for ten long years I walked away from my commitment to the Lord and lived a life that brought no glory to God and damaged my testimony for Jesus.So, as you listen to me, it should remind you that we serve the God of second chances. Sometimes I think maybe that's one major reason God has chosen to bless me with this ministry—to demonstrate that he is this gracious God of second chances. I am living proof that your life can be meaningful, exciting, and fulfilling, even though I made a thorough mess for a long time. God has miraculously salvaged me.I want to encourage you to know that you serve the God of second chances. The Bible gives many stories of people who, like me, needed a second chance and God gave it to them. Let’s take a look at some of these people who were living in God's plan "B" for their lives, for I believe it will teach us anew never to underestimate the power of the God we serve and what he is able to do with any mess we can make, and never to give up on anyone else. No one is beyond the power of the grace of God.Remember Rahab? Most any time her name is mentioned, her infamous title accompanies it: Rahab the Harlot! Well, we really should never refer to her with that title any longer because God gave her a second chance and brought her out of that sinful life and used her mightily. You'll find her story in Joshua 2.Rahab went the way of a lot of women of her day. She had to earn a living and she chose the world's oldest profession. We aren't told too many details of her early life, but we know she lived this life of sin for many years. But through a series of events, she bargained for her life with the two spies from the people of God, hid them in her home in exchange for protection for her family, and survived the slaughter and destruction of her country.Well, that's a good enough story as it is, but it doesn't end there. She marries one of those Israelites and becomes a foremother in the lineage of Jesus Christ. Her name is listed in Hebrews 11 as a great woman of faith. What a comeback! From a notorious harlot to the grandmother—many times removed—of Jesus Christ.Maybe you have a past of which you are ashamed. Could it be that for many years you lived a life of sin and you feel dirty and tainted as a result? If so, I want you to think about Rahab today and remember that God gives second chances to people with sordid pasts.You see, the enemy will try to hinder you and handicap you because of your past. He would have preferred that you never find forgiveness for that sin, but since you've done that already, at least he hopes to keep you mired in guilt and rotten memories.But dear friend, if you've asked God to forgive you, that past is behind you, he remembers it no more, and he wants you to go forward, free from guilt, with a new slate and a second chance. He's the God of second chances; he's just as willing to give you a second chance as he was with Rahab—and with me. Let God take the guilt of your past, put it under his precious blood, and set you free to see what he can do with you. It's never too late, and nothing is too hard for the Lord.One of my favorite people in the Bible is Peter. You know why?
You know, everybody needs encouragement and help at times, don't they? As I read 2 Corinthians 7, I realized that even the great Apostle Paul had his bad times when he needed other people. We read in verse 5 that Paul says: For when we came into Macedonia, this body of ours had no rest, but we were harassed at every turn—conflicts on the outside, fears within.Doesn't that describe the way you feel at times? Conflicts without, fears within? But this is the spiritual giant, Paul, and it surprises us to realize he would have these same feelings. Well, we really need to remember that positions of prominence do not isolate anyone from being human. Paul was tired and fearful. He needed help.Where did his help come from? He goes on to say, "But God, who comforts the downcast, comforted us by the coming of Titus.” He needed a friend at his side to comfort him, and so, Titus came along. We could say to Paul, "But wasn't it enough to have the Lord there?” And Paul would respond, "The Lord was there in the person of Titus. He comforted me by sending Titus."Yes indeed, that's how the body of Christ should function. God wants to use us in each other's lives as messengers of comfort and encouragement, to pick each other up at those weary and frightened moments of our lives. God has given us each other for that purpose.Paul goes on to say that he was comforted by the good report Titus brought to him of the concern for his welfare by his friends in Corinth. Paul needed to know that they cared, that they hadn't forgotten him, that they still loved him.How often do we miss these opportunities to be God's comfort in the lives of others? How often do we need to be by a friend's side when they're experiencing dark days? Or send a message to them—by email, on the phone—just to say, I care.Hallmark Cards has coined the phrase, "When you care enough to send the very best.” When we as Christians care enough about each other, we can send our very best, which is the comfort of God pouring through us to those who need it.Is there someone in your life today that needs a Titus? Ask God to show you and allow him to use you as his agent of comfort and encouragement.
We are examining the people who tend to bring out the worst in us. One reason God allows those people in our lives is to help us see our hidden errors for the purpose of changing us. But the other side of this coin is to ask ourselves if we bring out the worst in others. That is not the kind of person I want to be, how about you? I want to be someone who brings out the best in others.Now, think about it, does your presence in a situation tend to soothe matters, or do you often just make things worse? Jesus tells us we should be peacemakers, bringing peace into the small wars that go on between people every day. Do you do that? For instance, if there's an argument on your job between two other people, do you try to make peace in a helpful way?Often, we can bring out the best in others by giving deserved compliments or recognition, focusing on the positive in them rather than the negative. So often others will improve their performance or their attitude if someone just gives them a little recognition or praise. You can bring out the best in others by commending them when you can.In Proverbs 15, we see that a cheerful look brings joy to the heart. You can bring out the best in others by something as simple as a smile. You can help them cope better or feel better by the look on your face.Proverbs 12:18 says reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. And Proverbs 15:1 tells us that a gentle answer turns away wrath. It's easy to see that the words you speak can either bring out the worst or best in people.If you respond to someone with sharp and uncaring words, in a rushed or hasty manner, it can easily cause them to respond back to you in a poor way. But by choosing your words carefully, it's amazing how you can change that other person and bring out the best in them.When you're dealing with someone who is angry or upset, your goal should be to bring out the best in that person, to help him or her calm down. You can do that by being empathetic and sympathetic: "I'm so sorry you've had a problem.” Or "I can certainly understand how you feel.” You can help to calm someone down by controlling the tone of your voice, keeping it calm and kind. You can bring out the best in this angry person sometimes by simply listening and caring about the problem. Those are little things that bring out the best in people.Don't you think we could impact our world for Jesus Christ if we more and more became people who bring out the best in others? Ask God to make you that kind of Christian.
Have you ever said something like, "She just brings out the worst in me!"? It really is true certain people and certain circumstances seem to bring out the worst in us. Did you ever think that there might be a reason for that?In Psalm 19:12, David wrote: Who can discern his errors? Forgive my hidden faults. Then he goes on to pray in verse 13: Keep your servant also from willful sins... We see David was dealing with two types of sin and error in his life: Ones hidden to him that he could not even see, and ones that were willful.Of course, David's not the only one who has these two areas of sin in his life; we all do. We all understand the need to deal with the errors that are blatant; the ones we know about. But what about those hidden errors? Many times, these are things in our lives which never are changed because we just don't see them. "Who can discern his errors?" David asks. In other words, it's not easy to see them for yourself.So, what does God do for us? He sends people into our lives that bring out the worst in us. Here's a person in your life that causes you to be angry every time that person is in your presence. It seems like you say something hateful or unkind to him or her all the time. The truth is no one is in your life by accident, and those people who bring out the worst in you are there to show you those hidden errors, so you are no longer blind to them.Think about it: Who are the people that bring out the worst in you? Or perhaps it's a certain type of person that brings out the worst in you. Can you identify some of those people or types?Inept and dense people bring out the worst in me. I tend to have very judgmental attitudes toward them. When I analyze that, I realize it's the sin of pride, thinking I'm better than someone else. Wow, those hidden errors! Underneath them we'll discover all kinds of wrong attitudes that need to be changed.One of my regular prayers is to ask God to show me my hidden errors. It's a good prayer, so I encourage you to pray the same. And then every time you're around someone who brings out the worst in you, stop and realize God is answering your prayer and showing you your hidden errors, so that you can become more Christ-like.
I know that at this time of year many people are especially lonely. Psalm 68:6 says, "God sets the lonely in families, he leads out the prisoners with singing; but the rebellious live in a sun-scorched land.” I have found this verse to be exactly true in my life. As I have allowed God to make a home for me and to accept his presence as sufficient in my life, I have been set free from the awful heaviness of loneliness.That verse says only the rebellious dwell in a parched land. When we refuse to allow God to be our cure for loneliness, when we continue to try to do it our way and fill the empty void with people and activities, we'll continue to find loneliness our companion. Your feelings of loneliness may be because you are still rebelling against God's answers. You don't like the idea of learning to let him fill up your empty time and change your lonely feelings. As long as you continue to rebel, you will continue to live in that parched land of loneliness.There’s no doubt God created us for fellowship and companionship, and we need people in our lives, too. When Jesus was facing crucifixion, he took his three closest companions with him while he prayed. He needed God’s presence, and he needed their presence and support. The Apostle Paul spoke of his need to be with his companions and his encouragers.If you are lonely because you don’t have a good friend or friends or they’re not nearby, I would remind you that you have to reach out to others and be a friend in order to have friends. Ask yourself what you could do for someone else to be their friend and to meet their need, instead of waiting for someone to be your friend. We reap what we sow—that’s a biblical principle. If you want friendships, sow friendships; become a friend to others.Loneliness can be very crippling, and it is at epidemic levels these days, but you can take positive steps—by God’s grace—to overcome those depressing feelings of loneliness. Of course, the most important step to take is to spend time developing your relationship with Jesus through Bible study and prayer. He is a friend who sticks closer than a brother, and believe me, he is capable of filling that lonely space inside of you.
Merry Christmas! Perhaps you’re gathering with family to open gifts and eat great food, or maybe it’s a quiet day for you. However, you are celebrating today, the team here at The Christian Working Woman is here to wish you a blessed day. We just want to send you words of joy, reminding us of the miracle we are celebrating today.I’ll begin with this passage from Mary’s Magnificat, the amazing words she spoke as she visited her cousin Elizabeth. Here she is, a very young woman who will bear the Son of God, and she said:My soul magnifies the Lord, and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, for he has looked on the humble estate of his servant. For behold, from now on all generations will call me blessed; for he who is mighty has done great things for me, and holy is his name (Luke 1:46-49).Here’s a familiar passage from the prophet Isaiah:For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. Of the greatness of his government and peace there will be no end. He will reign on David’s throne and over his kingdom, establishing and upholding it with justice and righteousness from that time on and forever. The zeal of the Lord Almighty will accomplish this (Isaiah 9:5-7).And the Apostle Paul said this:Who, [Jesus Christ] being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death—even death on a cross! Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father (Philippians 2:6-11).Remember—you are deeply loved by the Savior of the world who came to sacrifice himself for our sake.Let me close with this reminder that what we are truly celebrating today is that Jesus is our salvation:God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God (2 Corinthians 5:21).Merry Christmas!
Did you realize that celebrating the birth of our Savior as we do began in the fourth century. There is no requirement in Scripture to celebrate Christmas, and yet it is one of the largest—if not the largest—holiday celebration for most people. Well, we’re going to talk about why we celebrate Christmas. The entire staff of The Christian Working Woman is with me now.
I am examining what it means to enjoy your forgiveness—to live in the incredible truth that when you confess and forsake your sins, God freely forgives and furthermore, he remembers them against you no more. They are removed from you as far as the East is from the West—and of course, the East and West can never meet.In 1 John 2:12, we read: I am writing to you, little children, because your sins are forgiven for his name's sake. Your forgiven sins have been forgiven for the honor of Jesus’ name. This is all done for God’s glory. Living in the joy of your forgiveness, testifying that God has forgiven you, enjoying your forgiveness is what God wants for his children—those who are born from above through faith in Jesus Christ.I want to close with a quote from an article I read by Luke Roland:The truth is, Christianity as a religion really has only one participant and that is Jesus. We are not participants, but recipients. We receive, and we receive the most amazing gift we could ever receive, which is forgiveness. This is why I believe it is important for us right now to understand our justification and to take our forgiveness very seriously, so we are not tossed around by a new false doctrine.And that false doctrine is forgiveness is something you have to earn or work for. You have to pay for your sins, your mistakes, your wrong choices. And then of course, you can never enjoy your forgiveness, because you can never pay for it or earn it. So, it’s a catch 22. But Jesus has come to set you free from that bondage. As Galatians 5:1 tells us: It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.My prayer today is you will begin now to enjoy your forgiveness and keep learning to do that. You do that by bringing every thought into captivity—those thoughts of guilt and regret—grabbing them and replacing them with the truth that you are forgiven. Truth sets you free.
Think about this: We know from Scripture the joy of the Lord is our strength. If someone or something takes your strength away, what happens? Well, not much.Not long ago I went through a medical procedure that took my strength. I had to pretty much do nothing for a few days because my strength was gone. No doubt you have experienced the reality that without strength, you pretty much can’t do anything, right?What do you think the enemy wants to steal from you? He knows when your spiritual strength is missing, you lose your ability to get things done for Jesus. You lose your joyful countenance, your joyful attitude—those things that testify to others about your faith. Therefore, if he can, he is going to steal your joy, because that is the source of your spiritual strength. And how does he do that?Well, he has many ways of shooting that arrow that steals your joy. Honestly, it is one of his most effective weapons and one of his most subtle ones, because we often don’t see he is behind our loss of joy. We don’t recognize that flaming arrow he shoots at us.And when you are living in regret, under a cloud of guilt from sins that have been confessed and forgiven, your joy is greatly diminished—stolen. And that debilitates you; it cripples you; it puts you on the sidelines; saps your spiritual strength and pretty soon you just want to quit. You feel unworthy and unlovable, and you’ve lost the joy of your salvation. The enemy is watching all this and patting himself on the back because that flaming arrow he shot got you, stole your joy, and kept you from enjoying God’s forgiveness.So, if that describes where you are lately, I’m hoping your take-away today will be that you will, with God’s help, begin to enjoy your forgiveness. You will start to understand the enemy’s tactics to keep you in regret and realize it dishonors the one who has purchased your forgiveness, Jesus Christ. He has given you the gift of forgiveness, just as he said he would, but you are not living in the joy and the peace and the strength that is your birthright as a child of God.
I’m examining the forgiveness God gives us—forgiveness that is full and complete. Unlike most humans, he never holds our past sins over our heads, reminding us again and again of how badly we failed. People tend to do that, but not God.I’m looking at God’s forgiveness—the fact that he remembers our sins against us no more. But many times we just don’t and won’t let go of it. Have you been wallowing around in the regrets of your past sins? True, you may be living with some of the consequences, but there’s no reason for you to let confessed sin hang over your head like a dark cloud.When that happens, you are not enjoying your forgiveness. It’s as though you’ve forgotten God has forgiven you, or you think he still intends to punish you for it. Perhaps you are just so sorry it happened that you can’t put it behind you. God is not honored in that way, is he?Maybe you’re wondering what it means to enjoy your forgiveness. Well, consider this. We know salvation is a gift from God. Ephesians 2:8–9 says: For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—not by works, so that no one can boast. So, when you receive a gift, how does it make you feel? It’s free—you didn’t have to work for it or pay for it or earn it. You couldn’t if you tried. It’s a gift.If I gave you a gift and you didn’t enjoy it, how would that make me feel? I would be disappointed, right? I mean, when I choose to give someone a gift, the greatest joy for me is seeing that they like it, they want it, and they are enjoying it. God gives us the gift of forgiveness—without charge—even though we don’t deserve it, and he loves to see us enjoy our gift of forgiveness.It certainly does not please God when you don’t let go of your regrets from the past. God wants you to enjoy his forgiveness and be thankful for it and go forward in your walk with him. Living under the cloud of your past sins steals your joy, robs you of peace, and makes you less effective in Kingdom work—less capable of doing the good works he planned for you to do.Are you enjoying your forgiveness? That’s the question, and I hope you will give it much thought and determine by God’s grace to refuse to let the enemy keep you under a cloud of regret from confessed sins that have been forgiven.
Are you enjoying your forgiveness? When the enemy of our soul can’t keep us from confessing our sins to our forgiving God, he’ll try to keep us from enjoying the truth that when God forgives us, he remembers it against us no more.But of course, in order to do that, you have to confess whatever sin is in your life, forsake it, and ask God to forgive you. And the good news is he is always willing to forgive us. 1 John 1:9 makes that very clear. It says, if we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.I believe a Christian who is refusing to confess known sin and keeps hanging on—even if it seems small and not important—is more miserable than a person who is not a follower of Jesus Christ and indulging in the same sin. It’s the Holy Spirit within us that becomes very uncomfortable—or offended or grieved—when we harbor unconfessed sin.The first thing is to make sure you have confessed your sin, turned from it, and you know God has forgiven you. Make sure of that. But maybe you’re thinking that you have done that, and yet, you keep asking God again and again to forgive you for what he has already forgiven. Does that describe you?If so, I would remind you God has chosen to remember your sins no more once they are forgiven and forsaken. Therefore, who are you to keep bringing them up, living in regret, and refusing to enjoy the forgiveness you have received?I understand God is probably the only one who can truly erase his memory if he chooses to. You and I in these earthly bodies with our sin natures, we just don’t have that miraculous power to totally forget. I get that.But we can do all things through Christ who strengthens us, so it is possible to enjoy your forgiveness instead of letting your past hang over you like a dark cloud, robbing you of peace and joy.
Do you find it difficult to believe God has truly forgiven you? I think there are just too many people who carry around guilt even after they’ve asked God to forgive them. They still live in the “if onlys” of life and imagine what their lives would have been “if only” they had not made a wrong choice.I want us to look on the other side of forgiveness today—when we have personally been forgiven and yet we don’t seem to enjoy that forgiveness. This thought came to me in one of my daily prayer zoom meetings which we’ve been having with the women in my church since COVID shut us down. This dear woman asked God to forgive her because she knew she was forgiven by him, yet she wasn’t enjoying her forgiveness. I immediately thought of many people I know who would fall into that category—including myself at times.I remember a time many years ago now, when I had come back to full fellowship with the Lord after a long period of chasing my dreams and living my life my way. I was truly sorry for my wayward ways and had confessed them. I knew that God had forgiven me, but one day as I was praying, some of those past sins just came flooding back into my mind. I was once again ashamed and embarrassed and so regretful that I had allowed those sins into my life. I started asking God once again for forgiveness, specifically confessing them. And honestly, the voice of God’s Spirit to me that day was almost audible, as I heard him say, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Isaiah 43:25 says: I, even I, am he who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more.Have you ever tried to erase something from your memory? We all have things we would like to forget, but we just can’t totally erase things from our memories—at least not the things we’d like to erase.Have you discovered that the things you’d like to forget are the things that hang around your mind, and at the same time you forget lots of good things that you should remember? It’s a common human problem; we remember what we should forget and forget what we should remember. And who do you think aids and abets us in that process? The enemy of our soul, Satan himself. If he can keep us mired in the regrets from yesterday, in the guilt we insist on carrying with us even though God has forgiven us, then he steals our joy, robs our peace, and keeps us in bondage to the past.So, that’s why I want to encourage you to enjoy your forgiveness.
Presented by Lisa BishopI read a story of forgiveness about a woman whose husband was kidnapped and tortured. In her words she was in a “living hell” as the captors demanded ransom money she did not have and sent her photos of her husband enduring unspeakable evil at the hands of the men who captured him. For 30 long weeks her husband experienced cruel and unusual punishment. As I read her story, I could feel the anguish in my own soul for all of the pain and loss she and her husband endured. Forgiveness was a journey for her, but she realized she was harming herself by holding onto hatred and over time got to a place where she felt empathy, forgave the men, and released herself from her self-contained prison of unforgiveness. I cannot even imagine going through something so nightmarish and yet this is what she said.Now I remind myself daily to apply forgiveness to my everyday life while driving, while in the grocery store, and at home with my family. Every time I feel myself going into anger or judgment, I instead choose empathy and forgiveness. I get better at it every day.This woman’s story is an extreme example and most of us may not experience what she endured. But the fact that she could get to a place of forgiveness is an example for you and me.Jesus is our ultimate example of extending forgiveness.Our Christian faith requires us to forgive so we must work at it and be willing. At some point in our lives we all will experience feelings of unforgiveness. Anger, resentment, bitterness, or perhaps even hatred towards another person. Maybe in this very moment there are people in your life that you are refusing to forgive or maybe you have tried to let go of hurt or hard feelings but you find yourself having a really difficult time.First off, you are not alone. Forgiveness is something we have all struggled with at one time or another, and while forgiveness is a fundamental of the Christian faith, sometimes it is easier said than done. I am not an expert on forgiveness, in fact I have had to overcome my own obstacles to forgive when I have been hurt.For years I worked to forgive someone that I experienced as very toxic. While I did not want to hold onto my ill feelings towards the person, it was challenging. I prayed, I read the Word asking God to help me. I even hired a coach to help me work through my feelings of anger and bitterness. It took some really hard work over time.You may have experienced things in your life that seem unforgivable; tremendous loss and tragedy caused at the hands of another person. More common are the day-to-day rubs, miscommunication or insensitivities we have toward each other that can fester into unforgiveness. Whether a minor offense or major violation, forgiveness can feel like a hard pill to swallow. But it’s the crux of the Gospel message.Romans 5:8: “God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”And Ephesians 4:32, “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”These are only two of the 125+ references to forgiveness in the Bible. Forgiveness is a big deal to God and it is meant to be a daily practice for followers of Jesus. Living a lifestyle of forgiveness is what you and I are called to.Letting go of hurts and surrendering them to Jesus is non-negotiable.But let’s face it, relationships can be messy at times. Our marriages, friendships, family, and work relationships are vulnerable to the venom of unforgiveness if we are not mindful.Speaking of venom, if you were bit by a snake (I hope that never happens to you), what would you do first? Stomp on the snake and yell at it, or would you try to suck the venom out of you? My guess is your first action would be to get rid of the poison in your body.Unforgiveness is like poison flowing through your veins and the best thing to do is to eliminate it.
(presented by Lisa Bishop)Do you find it hard to admit when you are wrong?This week we have been talking about forgiveness, and today, I want to talk about playing your part in restoring and strengthening relationships through the power of an apology.If we are honest, we can be prone to refusing to humble ourselves and ask for forgiveness for our misgivings. We have a tendency not to see our faults but to be quick to point out the transgressions of others.But as a follower of Jesus, we are called as 1 Peter 5:5-6 says,Clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because,‘God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.’Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. When you come clean and confess your shortcomings, you humble yourself before God. Confession is not only the right thing to do, it is the righteous thing to do. Whether you gossiped about a coworker, lost your temper with a teammate, or neglected to follow-through on a commitment to a friend or family member, take responsibility for your failure.As a first step, heed the words of 1 John 1:8-10.If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and his word is not in us.Confess your sin to God, and then come clean with the person you hurt or offended. Take responsibility for your error. And when you do, be specific about what you are asking to be forgiven for.For example, with a co-worker you might say, “I was wrong when I talked over you in the meeting. Will you forgive me?” Or when talking to a loved one, “I was impatient and overreacted. That is not how I want to be. Our relationship is important to me, will you forgive me?”The key to apologizing is to be sincere and to make sure your admission is heartfelt, knowing that when you behave poorly it grieves the heart of God in addition to driving a wedge in relationships.While a sincere apology will not guarantee that you will be given grace, a genuine request for forgiveness can be the start of a renewed relationship. Rather than settling for a fractured friendship, be humble, move toward reconciliation, and do your part to repair the damage and restore connection.
(presented by Lisa Bishop)Did you know forgiveness is referenced more than 125 times in the Bible? If forgiveness is so important to God, then why do we struggle with it? Why can it be so hard to bury the hatchet and pardon people, to forgive them for an error or offense? I think one reason is pride. We think too highly of ourselves and hold others to a higher standard than we are willing to hold ourselves to. We forget that just as others fall short, we all fall short of the glory of God with our mishaps.Proverbs 16:18 says,Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.I’m sorry to say pride and my attitude of arrogance have blinded me at times and led me to believe I am better than others. With thoughts of “I cannot believe they did that,” leading to judgment and a feeling of superiority; when I know darn well that I am less than perfect, too.A key to forgiveness is allowing other people to be imperfect and make mistakes. Make allowance for other people’s faults just as you would want them to do for you.Hebrews 12:1-2 says,...let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith.Throw off every weight that hinders you. It’s like being in a boat and you just cannot seem to get anywhere until you intentionally pull up the anchor. Unforgiveness is an anchor and when left unchecked it is heavy and it hinders. Pride impedes our relationship with God and others.Pride can cause you to hold people’s shortcomings over them. And in some ways, I think unforgiveness can be an attempt to control another person. We think if we withhold forgiveness we can inflict hurt and pain—and while that may be true—the one who really suffers is you.’I once heard it said, “Our response to offense determines our future.” Make it your goal to be quick to forgive just as God in Christ Jesus has forgiven you. Don’t let your future be governed by the bondage of unforgiveness.You are not alone on your journey of forgiveness. I know some of us have experienced pretty horrific things in life and I am always amazed when I hear stories of forgiveness from those who have experienced great loss at the hands of others. It’s only by the power of Jesus that we can fully forgive, and forgiveness is an act of faith.
(presented by Lisa Bishop)Are you grieving the Holy Spirit?Did you know that unforgiveness grieves the Holy Spirit?Ephesians 4:29-33 tells us,Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.“Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God.” To grieve means “to cause to feel sorrow, pain, unhappiness, or distress.” As the third person of the Trinity, the Holy Spirit has a personality and the ability to feel emotions. Sometimes we can forget God is a personal God. We disregard the fact that Jesus is relational and the Holy Spirit feels. The Holy Spirit grieves when we sin and behave in ways unbecoming of a follower of Jesus. When we hold onto bitterness and anger and have malice in our hearts through unforgiveness, we hamper our relationship with God. When you do not forgive you forgo the full power of the Holy Spirit working through you. But remember when you struggle to forgive, the Holy Spirit is right there to help you.In John 14:15-16, Jesus says,If you love me, keep my commands. And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another advocate to help you and be with you forever—the Spirit of truth.You have the power of the Holy Spirit dwelling in you, ready to help you 24/7/365. Forgiving others is possible and it flows from your fellowship with God. When you abide in Jesus you become like him. You think, feel, speak, and act like him. When you spend time in his word, the Holy Spirit speaks to you through scripture. You grow in sensitivity to hear God’s voice and he matures you, softens you, and sanctifies you.So, give up grieving God through unforgiveness and grow in forgiving as God in Christ forgave you.Forgiveness is hard work. But the more you do it, the easier it will get! And I am growing right alongside you.
(presented by Lisa Bishop)Are you giving the enemy permission to disrupt your peace?I want to examine a way you may be giving Satan a wide-open invitation to harass you and mess with your internal harmony.Unforgiveness.I know the topic of forgiveness is a familiar one, but the real question is this, “Is the practice of forgiveness a part of your life?” As a follower of Christ, it is one thing to know you are called to forgive, but do you actually practice what the Bible preaches?Ephesians 4:26-27 says,In your anger do not sin. Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.When you give the devil a foothold, it means you are giving the enemy an opportunity. Anger is a byproduct of holding onto unforgiveness, and if you do not forgive, anger will get a hold of you. The devil will use it as an opportunity to influence your life, to control or manipulate you. Anger and unforgiveness are powerful and destructive emotions when we let them run wild and do not run to the cross.I’ll never forget a conference I went to several years ago. The speaker was talking about anxiety and depression and the link to unforgiveness. The bottom line is that unforgiveness can meddle with your mental health.When someone you care about hurts you, you can hold on to anger and resentment—or embrace forgiveness and move forward. Making the intentional decision to let go of resentment and bitterness has been proven to decrease stress and anxiety, lessen symptoms of depression, improve heart health, lower blood pressure, strengthen your immune system, and improve your mental health. Forgiveness is a prerequisite for a healthy life and flourishing relationships, and it is also a command from God.Your father knows best! God knows the impact of unforgiveness, and he wants you to experience the fullness of life in Jesus. So don’t give the devil a foothold. Now, forgiveness doesn't mean excusing the harm done to you. But working on forgiveness will lessen its grip on you.Remember, we all sin and fall short of the glory of God. Ask God to help you release your offender so you can be set free from the weight of holding on to hurt. I have heard unforgiveness referred to as the bait of Satan. Give your feelings to God and ask him to replace them with understanding, empathy, and compassion for the person.Make a practice of forgiveness. Keep short accounts and don’t take the bait.
(presented by Lisa Bishop)Is your life a witness of forgiveness?When someone lies about you, a friend or family member betrays you, or a coworker speaks harsh or dismissive words, do you extend grace and work to forgive, or are you prone to hold onto a grudge?1 John 2:9-10 says,Anyone who claims to be in the light but hates a brother or sister is still in the darkness. Anyone who loves their brother and sister lives in the light, and there is nothing in them to make them stumble.These verses are speaking specifically to and about our relationship with fellow believers. But the call to love and live in the light of Jesus applies to every relationship and interaction we have. The Apostle John is teaching that you cannot say you love Jesus and live in his power when you are harboring hatred. You may be saying, “I don’t hate anyone.” Hate is a strong word, but let’s not get hung up on that because John is juxtaposing hate with the ultimate command to love. Anything other than love, even the slightest dislike for someone can have us walking in darkness. Along with hatred, comes some form of unforgiveness, which is a stumbling block. You cannot walk in the light and hate at the same time, and hate has a way of ruling our lives.The power of the Gospel rests on the forgiveness you and I received by the atoning blood of Jesus. He shed his blood for people who slapped him, spit at him, mocked him, yelled cruel words. These were people who threatened his life and ultimately hung him on a cross. When you forgive others, your life becomes a witness to the Gospel of Jesus Christ. When you forgive, your life become a witness to the forgiveness and saving grace of Jesus.In his final days on earth, in the very throws of being betrayed and hunted down by his enemies, Jesus leaves his disciples with these words.A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples if you love one another (John 13:34-35).As the saying goes, “Actions speak louder than words.”How we treat each other speaks louder than the Christian doctrines we teach. Let your life be an overflow to the supernatural love of God. Let your life be a witness of forgiveness.
If you’re finding it hard to find just the right gift for someone you know, I’ve got a suggestion for the best possible gift. You can afford it and yet it is priceless. The gift I’m talking about is the gift of forgiveness. Here’s a story that illustrates this as told by John William Smith.The Christmas of 1949 we didn’t have a tree. My dad had as much pride as anybody, I suppose, so he wouldn’t just say that we couldn’t afford one. When I mentioned it, my mother said that we weren’t going to have one this year, that we couldn’t afford one, and even if we could – it was stupid to clutter up your house with a dead tree. I wanted a tree badly though, and I thought – in my naïve way – that if we had one, everybody would feel better.Taking matters into my own hands, about three days before Christmas, I was out collecting for my paper route. It was fairly late – long after dark – it was snowing and very cold. I went to the apartment building to try to catch a customer who hadn’t paid me for nearly two months – she owed me seven dollars. Much to my surprise, she was home. She invited me in and not only did she pay me, she gave me a dollar tip! It was a windfall for me – I now had eight whole dollars.What happened next was totally unplanned. On the way home, I walked past a Christmas tree lot and the idea hit me. The selection wasn’t very good because it was so close to the holiday, but there was this one real nice tree. It had been a very expensive tree and no one had bought it; now it was so close to Christmas that the man was afraid no one would. He wanted ten dollars for it, but when I – in my gullible innocence – told him I only had eight, he said he might sell it for that. I really didn’t want to spend the whole eight dollars on the tree, but it was so pretty that I finally agreed.I dragged it all the way home – about a mile, I think – and I tried hard not to damage it or break off any limbs. The snow helped to cushion it, and it was still in pretty good shape when I got home. You can’t imagine how proud and excited I was. I propped it up against the railing on our front porch and went in.My heart was bursting as I announced that I had a surprise. I got Mom and Dad to come to the front door and then I switched on the porch light. Surprise!!"Where did you get that tree?" my mother exclaimed. But it wasn’t the kind of exclamation that indicates pleasure. "I bought it up on Main Street. Isn’t it just the most perfect tree you ever saw?" I said, trying to maintain my enthusiasm."Where did you get the money?" Her tone was accusing, and it began to dawn on me that this wasn’t going to turn out as I had planned."From my paper route." I explained about the customer who had paid me."And you spent the whole eight dollars on this tree?" she exclaimed. She went into a tirade about how stupid it was to spend my money on a dumb tree that would be thrown out and burned in a few days.She told me how irresponsible I was and how I was just like my dad with all those foolish, romantic, noble notions about fairy tales and happy endings and that it was about time I grew up and learned some sense about the realities of life and how to take care of money and spend it on things that were needed and not on silly things.She said that I was going to end up in the poor house because I believe in stupid things like Christmas trees, things that didn’t amount to anything. I just stood there. My mother had never talked to me like that before and I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I felt awful and I began to cry. Finally, she reached out and snapped off the porch light."Leave it there," she said. "Leave that tree there till it rots, so every time we see it, we’ll all be reminded of how stupid the men in this family are.” Then she stormed up the stairs to her bedroom and we didn’t see her until the next day. Dad and I brought the tree in and we made a stand for it.
Are you a compassionate person? Jesus was.We read in Matthew 9:36 that:“When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.”We're told that Jesus is touched with the feelings of our weaknesses because he was in all points tempted like we are (Hebrews 4:15). That continually comforts me, as I go to Jesus with my problems, knowing that he's walked this path before me, and he knows how I feel. That's how we become compassionate people—by putting ourselves in other people's shoes and feeling what they feel.I remember a sermon where the minister challenged us to ask God to break our hearts with the things that broke his heart. Jesus’ heart was broken when he saw harassed and helpless people, people who were without any purpose in life, people who had no compass for life, no meaning in life.Do you have any of those people working around you? They may be people who irritate you a great deal and even cause you considerable trouble. But if you looked beyond their behavior and truly saw their condition, like Jesus did, you might be able to have compassion on them.I’ve found that as soon as I can feel compassion for someone, as soon as I walk in their shoes even for a few minutes, my entire attitude changes. I respond very differently to someone for whom I feel compassion. I do things for someone for whom I have compassion that I wouldn’t do otherwise. And in the process, I reduce my own stress immensely as I take the focus off myself and put it on the other person.Maybe those harassed and helpless people are in your life for a reason. Perhaps they need your compassion today. Don’t you think it would be a good idea to ask God to help you recognize the people in your life who need some compassion today?
I’m offering some workday meditations this week. Short thoughts based on God’s Word, to encourage you and challenge you to keep on living out your faith where you work.Proverbs 24:17 tells us:“Do not gloat when your enemy falls; when he stumbles, do not let your heart rejoice.”There was a time in my career when I worked for a very difficult man. I spent many unhappy days in that job because of the way he treated me and others. After about a year God revealed to me that I had great malice in my heart toward him.I certainly had never thought of myself as a malicious person, but there it was all over my heart: dirty, ugly malice. I wanted bad things to happen to him. I dreamed about him making some gigantic mistake and being fired. I wished and hoped he would get his “comeuppance.” That is malice.Years later after we had both left that company, I heard of some stumbles he had made. I guess you could say he got what was coming to him. What goes around comes around, and all that. But, by God’s grace, I had gotten rid of that malice toward him, and I was very saddened to hear that things were not going well for him. It brought no satisfaction or joy to learn that he had stumbled.We should never gloat over someone else’s misfortune, even if they brought it on themselves. First Corinthians 13 reminds us that love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. Dig deep in your heart today and see if there is any malice hiding there. If so, get it cleaned out fast and let God’s love fill your heart instead. Just ask the Lord to reveal to you any attitude of malice or gloating and to keep you from rejoicing in evil, but rather give you a concerned heart for anyone who has stumbled.
Have you ever been “passed over” for a promotion or raise that you knew you deserved? If that has ever happened to you, I don’t have to tell you how discouraging it can be not to get credit for your contributions at work. And yet, these things happen all the time.We live and work in a world that is neither fair nor kind. That’s because the world is full of people who have a sin problem, including us! And that sin problem creates injustice of all sorts.Injustice is one of my toughest hurdles. I always want to fight when I think my rights or someone else’s rights are being violated. As you can imagine, this tendency has gotten me into some hot water and created not a few problems in my work life.Paul wrote to the Ephesians:“Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not men, because you know that the Lord will reward everyone for whatever good he does, whether he is slave or free” (Ephesians 6:7-8).I have to remind myself that if I serve wholeheartedly as unto the Lord, the recognitions and rewards will come in due time.As Christians, we pick up our paychecks at our place of work, but our real job is to please the Lord and work for him. Our reward is waiting for us in heaven—but we can reap the benefits now, too. Just imagine how your stress level will drop as thoughts of vengeance and discontent are replaced with calm satisfaction over a job well done, and knowing that Jesus is pleased with you!So, my challenge to us all is to remember all day long that we report to Jesus, and he will reward his “good and faithful servants.”
I’m sharing some excerpts from a 30-day devotional I wrote a few years ago.Our scripture for today is Isaiah 35:3-4:“Encourage the exhausted and strengthen the feeble. Say to those with anxious heart, "Take courage, fear not"” (Isaiah 35:3-4).Have you noticed that discouragement seems to be at epidemic levels? Most working environments are flooded with discouragement, and many times our homes are full of discouraging words.As Christians, being an encourager is not an option, it's a directive. Christians should be people who strengthen the feeble and exhausted with encouraging words.Can you think of someone in the feeble and/or exhausted category right now? Maybe it’s a co-worker or your manager. They may put on a face that says, "I have it all together and I don't need anyone.” But don't let that fool you. Just like you and me, they need to hear encouraging words, words of hope and cheer—and they need to hear them from you.We also need to encourage people who have failed. Barnabas was that kind of an encourager. When Mark had failed and the Apostle Paul didn't want to give him another chance, Barnabas insisted on allowing Mark to travel with them. So, when they could not agree, Paul went one way with Silas, and Barnabas and Mark went another way. Later on Paul asks Timothy to get Mark and bring him for "Mark is useful to me for service," he said.You don't have to fill in too many blanks to see what happened. Barnabas had taken Mark, taught him, encouraged him, and Mark had become a profitable servant of Jesus Christ. Obviously, Paul recognized this, too, and I imagine Paul learned a valuable lesson from Barnabas. It is really important to encourage people at times of failure.If you know someone who is struggling with failure, encourage them. They need to know that all is not lost, and they can go from where they are. My challenge to you is to encourage at least one feeble and exhausted person today.
I’m going to share some Workplace Meditations from a thirty-day devotional I wrote a few years ago. I think they’ll give you encouragement—and something to ponder each day.I want to talk about the power of “I’m sorry.” A good friend of mine told me that the biggest difference between her and her co-workers who are not Christians is that she apologizes a lot more than they do! She struggles with things in her life, just like you and I do. But she is willing to say, "I'm sorry," and I'm convinced her apologies are witnesses to the power of Jesus.Have you recently lost your temper with a co-worker, told a lie to your manager, or deceived a customer in some way? If so, your conscience probably hasn't stopped bothering you, and that’s good. When our own sin doesn’t bother us, we are in a very dangerous position. A prickling conscience is one way God prompts you to take advantage of his offer to forgive you and purify you; all you have to do is confess.Maybe you’re wondering how you could ever be a witness for Jesus since you know you've failed and others know you've failed and what's more, you may fail again. But everybody struggles with failure, and those who are not Christians have no good way to deal with the guilt that often accompanies failure. One of the best ways to witness is to own up to our own failures, make restitution where necessary, and share that God is a forgiving and restoring God.I can remember when God used a specific failure on my part to help a struggling Christian co-worker understand that God would forgive and restore him when he failed. I really blew it in front of him, and I didn't want to go back in that office. But God clearly told me to go back and be very honest about my failure, which is what I did.Obviously, it would have been better not to fail, but isn’t it great that God uses even our shortcomings? Don’t let some failure or fear of failure keep you from being a bold witness for Jesus. Remember, he can turn your ashes into beauty, if you will let him.
Have you been in a bookstore lately? If so, no doubt you’ve noticed that more and more the store is devoted to gifts and cards and less and less to books. Why is that? I suppose there are lots of reasons, but the facts are, reading books is becoming a lost art! Certainly, the internet and electronic media have contributed to this, and our ever-shortening attention spans as well. But reading a good book is one of the best gifts you can give yourself and others.I’m going to suggest a few classics that I highly recommend you read. I truly believe every Christian would benefit from reading these books.First, I want to recommend a book by C. S. Lewis, Mere Christianity. As the title suggests, Dr. Lewis’s purpose was to present Christianity in its most basic form and explain why he had come from an atheistic belief to be a true disciple of Jesus Christ. He was a wonderful, deep thinker and was called the most original Christian writer of the last century. Let me quote from the chapter entitled “What Christians Believe”:“I am trying here to prevent anyone saying the really foolish thing that people often say about (Jesus): ‘I’m ready to accept Jesus as a great moral teacher, but I don’t accept His claim to be God.” That is the one thing we must not say. A man who was merely a man and said the sort of things Jesus said would not be a great moral teacher. He would either be a lunatic—on a level with the man who says he is a poached egg—or else he would be the Devil of Hell. You must make your choice. Either this man was, and is, the Son of God; or else a madman or something worse. You can shut Him up for a fool, you can spit at Him and kill Him as a demon; or you can fall at His feet and call Him Lord and God. But let us not come with a patronizing nonsense about His being a great human teacher. He has not left that open to us. He did not intend to.” (Page 55-56)What an ingenious and brilliant summary of who Jesus claimed to be and indeed who he is. And this book is full of this kind of beautifully written truth and doctrine. If you haven’t read it yet, you can easily find a copy or download it. If you have read it, it’s well worth re-reading. Again, the name is Mere Christianity by C. S. Lewis. He wrote many other wonderful books but started with this one. It should be on every Christian’s must-read list.Another book I consider a classic is Knowing God by J. I. Packer. I’ve read this book three or four times, and I tell you, it has definitely helped me get to know God better. Dr. Packer is a theological professor, but don’t worry—it is written in easy-to-understand and yet very rich words. Let me quote one of my favorite paragraphs—and it was difficult to choose only one, because virtually every page in my book is marked and highlighted:“There is unspeakable comfort—the sort of comfort that energizes, be it said, not enervates—in knowing that God is constantly taking knowledge of me in love and watching over me for my good. There is tremendous relief in knowing that His love to me is utterly realistic, based at every point on prior knowledge of the worst about me, so that no discovery now can disillusion him about me, in the way I am so often disillusioned about myself, and quench His determination to bless me. There is, certainly, great cause for humility in the thought that He sees all the twisted things about me that my fellowmen do not see (and am I glad!), and that He sees more corruption in me than that which I see in myself (which, in all conscience, is enough). There is, however, equally great incentive to worship and love God in the thought that, for some unfathomable reason, He wants me as His friend and desires to be my friend and has given His Son to die for me in order to realize this purpose.” (P. 37)Dear friends, this is a book you need to read—more than once. Again, its title is Knowing God by J. I. Packer.The third book I want to recommend is a tiny book—you can easily read it in one...
Did you ever look around you on your job and see how many of your coworkers are just trudging through their job, hating every minute of it, griping and complaining about it all the time? That’s not an unusual scenario. As a Christian, you have a marvelous advantage over those you work with who don’t yet know Jesus as Savior. Do you know what that advantage is? It is the power of prayer.Advantage: Your job can be transformed into a ministry.The Bible teaches us that we can do everything we do to the glory of Jesus Christ. So, even those mundane, perhaps boring elements of your job, those things that don’t appear to have any eternal significance, can be transformed into meaningful activity through prayer.Here’s how that works. You begin praying about every aspect of your job and every person you deal with in your job. You ask God to bring glory to himself through your performance on your job. As you face each individual day, you pray for the agenda for that day, praying that you will be a good ambassador for Jesus Christ throughout the whole day. You ask God to use your words, your body language, the quality of your work effort, your attitude, and all your interactions with people as lights in a dark world.When you start praying like that on a daily basis, you will discover that God begins to use you in ways you can’t even imagine. People will ask you the most incredible questions that give you opportunities to share your faith. Others in need of comfort will talk to you, as you listen and show compassion. You’ll discover that mundane activity turns into meaningful conversations or quiet prayer meetings with you and the Lord.Then instead of dreading that job, or wishing you didn’t have to work there, you’ll begin to realize that God has a higher purpose for putting you there, and instead of just going to work every day, you’re going to a place of service, a ministry in the midst of the marketplace. Now, that makes it much easier to go to work each day. And it all begins with daily, on-going prayer on the job. It’s an advantage beyond belief. Don’t let it pass you by!I have written and published a Prayer Journal, and you may find that helpful in developing a deeper prayer life.
I’ve been pointing out some of our incredible advantages as believers in the workplace because we have the privilege of prayer. Here’s another one.Advantage: You can be positive in a negative world.While everyone else around you is griping and complaining all the time, you can remain positive and joyful because each day you can pray for God to control your thoughts. Every time you start to think or say something in negative mode, to complain about the company or the boss or a coworker, stop in the middle of that thought or sentence and turn it into a prayer. Instead of wallowing in the self-pity and negativity of the moment, you have the advantage of staying positive and joyful regardless of the circumstances.Advantage: You can be peaceful instead of stressed-out. Paul wrote to the Philippians:“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your request to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:6-7).Because we have this invitation to present every anxious situation to God in prayer, we don’t have to be stressed out even when others are falling apart around us. Isn’t that an incredible benefit?Are you taking advantage of giving over all your anxiety to the Lord? I hope you’re not trying to carry that burden yourself. Jesus is ready to take your heavy burden and give you a light one, as soon as you present your situation to God in prayer. And when you do, the stress of the situation goes away. People pay tons of money to try to get rid of stress, and we have the secret weapon ready to be used at any time—prayer!It’s little wonder that our enemy does everything possible to keep us from praying very much, because he is fully aware of the great advantage we have through prayer. The power of heaven is unleashed in our world through prayer. The blessings of God are showered on us through prayer. The wisdom and guidance we need so often to make good decisions can be found in prayer. The comfort and assurance that keep us going come through prayer. It’s our secret weapon and our great advantage. What a shame when we don’t use it like we should.
What is your greatest advantage as a Christian in the workplace? You may be scratching your head, trying to think if you have an advantage. I want to assure you that you do, and that advantage is prayer.Advantage: You can deal with difficult people much better.Most of our frustrations are caused by people—right? So, what do you do when you’re dealing with a difficult coworker or boss or customer? Well, because we have the power of prayer as believers, we have an amazing advantage when it comes to dealing with people, even difficult ones.First, you want to pray for all the people in your work world regularly. Ask God to help you see those people the way he sees them. Call them by name and specifically pray for each of them as much as possible.Then, ask for wisdom on how to deal with the difficult relationships. Got a boss that seems impossible? Have you ever asked God to show you how to handle that boss? Or do you just gripe and complain about the boss? That won’t do any good, but prayer changes people! Whether it changes you or your boss or both, you’ll find it much easier to deal with a difficult boss when you devote daily prayer to that person.“A king’s wrath is a messenger of death, but a wise man will appease it” (Proverbs 16:14).A king represents those in authority over us, and when you have a difficult boss, one who gives messages of death, if you are wise, you can appease that boss.How can you be wise?“If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him” (James 1:5).You can have the advantage of godly wisdom in knowing how to deal with difficult people. God’s wisdom is better than an advanced degree is business!I’ve been praying James 1:5 for years, recognizing my great need for wisdom in all areas. It began to dawn on me not long ago that I had made some pretty wise decisions, which didn’t really seem like me at all. Then I thought, “Well, of course; you’ve been asking God for wisdom, and he has answered your prayer.” It’s a great advantage to be able to pray for God’s wisdom.
Sometimes we Christians like to see ourselves as disadvantaged in our workday worlds. We can get a bit paranoid about being picked on or isolated or laughed at. But the truth is, as believers we have an immense advantage over non-believers in our work worlds, because we have a secret weapon: prayer.Our days go better when we start with prayer. Here’s another important benefit prayer affords us.Advantage: You have a way to deal with crises.All day long as a believer you can send up prayer to the Lord, silently and quickly. So, when anything unusual arises, when any problem surfaces or something is not going the way it should, you have this ever-present resource for help and guidance. This is one of your greatest benefits as a believer.When you face a crisis or some great need, you can pray right then and there, and God will guide you and comfort you and rescue you. Have you tried it on the job? Did you think God’s arm was too short to save you in a job-related problem? Never!When you don’t know the answer to a predicament, pray. When you’re faced with a task that seems too large, pray. When you can’t figure out what you should or should not do, pray. When it looks like things are going down the tubes, pray.“God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble” (Psalm 46:1).The Lord is waiting to hear from you and deliver you out of your trouble.Now, I want to make it clear that prayer is not a magic wand we wave to demand God’s help. Prayer is not a method for persuading God to do what we want him to do. Prayer is the way we get in line with what God wants to do in any given situation. It is the way God changes us. It is the way we relinquish our worries and cares and allow God to be God in our lives.
I have really great news for those who are out there in the workplace every day. If you’re a disciple of Jesus Christ, if you belong to the Family of God, you have an incredible advantage in the workplace. You have a tool to use that guarantees you a leg-up in every situation you face. You have a weapon to fight with that is totally effective against any problem you encounter. Here’s your secret weapon, your great advantage: It is prayer!Have you been taking advantage of prayer on your job? I find that many believers don’t really pray about their jobs or on their jobs. Do you? I want to point out just some of the advantages you enjoy when you pray about your job.Advantage: Your day goes better with prayer.Since your day is won or lost in the morning hours, when you pray before your day begins, you have a great advantage all day long. “. . . in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight” (Proverbs 3:6).So, before your day begins, if you will acknowledge the Lord and seek his guidance for every detail of that day, your path will be straight, no matter what happens.Those who don’t know the Lord have to try to take care of everything in their own strength. They have to worry about the unknown and the uncontrollable. But for us who know Jesus as Savior, he carries all those burdens for us, so we have an immense advantage.Do you start your workdays with prayer? If not, you’re depriving yourself of many benefits. I encourage you to begin this discipline right away.Think through the day ahead. Pray for the people you will be working with and for. Ask God for wisdom in dealing with them, praying for their individual needs as you know them. Think about the schedule you have for the day, your workload. Ask God for strength to get it all done and help in setting appropriate priorities. Pray that your words will be carefully chosen; that you will speak the truth in love.If you will cover your day in detail with prayer, you will see miracles, big and small. It gives you a marvelous advantage!
You may have noticed the term "first fruits" as you read the Bible. The dictionary definition of "first fruits" tells us that it is the first products or results of anything. It embodies the idea of "cream of the crop," "putting your best foot forward," "giving it your best shot.”In the Old Testament Moses used the term first fruits when he was establishing the laws relating to sacrifices. God gave the law through Moses to guide the children of Israel, and they were to live by these laws very carefully. When Jesus the Messiah came, he fulfilled the law, and we no longer are required to practice those rituals and sacrificial offerings, which foreshadowed Jesus Christ.However, we can learn a great deal from those laws and use them as guiding principles in our own lives. And this principle of bringing the first fruits is certainly one that is applicable to us. In Exodus 23 Moses was giving instructions about the three annual festivals which were to be observed each year, and one of those was the Feast of Harvest. This was a festival to celebrate their crops, very similar, I would think, to the original meaning of our Thanksgiving Day celebration.For this Feast of Harvest, Moses clearly instructed the people to bring the first fruits of their crops, the best of the fruits of their soil. In other words, leftovers were definitely out. They must bring to God their best and keep for themselves what was left over.Now, you and I don't bring crops to the Lord—at least not many of us do. I can tell you that on my trips to Kenya, I have often been in church meetings where people brought their crops as an offering. But most of us don’t bring crops to God as a thank offering. So, what are the things we bring to God as a thank offering, to give to him for use in his service? The first thing that comes to mind is time. What would it mean to us to bring the first fruits of our time? Well, I think that it means, in part, to start each day by giving God those early moments, those first moments.The Psalmist wrote: "Satisfy me in the morning with your unfailing love, that I may sing for joy and be glad all day long" (Psalm 90:14). And again, "In the morning, O Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation"(Psalm 5:3). I have those two verses written on the first page of my prayer journal, to remind me of how important it is to spend those first fruit hours with the Lord.In my Bible study entitled "A Guide on Getting to Know God," I suggest a challenge to give God the first hour of your day. At a time in my life when I desperately needed help to make it through the day, God taught me this principle, which has made a huge difference in my life. That habit of bringing to God the first hour of my day has been life-changing for me.Tell me, what is your first hour like each day? Wait 'til the last minute to put your feet on the floor, and then rush and dash to get to work on time? The way you start your day sets the pattern for how that day will go, for what you will think about during the day. It is true that your day is won or lost in the morning hours. I want to strongly encourage you to be willing to give God the first fruits of your day, that first bright hour.Now, I can hear some of you saying to me, "But, Mary, I need my sleep!” And that's absolutely right; you do. So, maybe you have to get to bed a little earlier, huh? Or maybe you're thinking, "An hour is too much. I can't spare an hour.” Well, there's no law that says it has to be an hour, but you can't rush in and out of God's presence with your shopping list, like the local supermarket, and expect that to make any difference in your life. That's not giving God first fruits; when we rush in and out it's another form of leftovers for God. It's been my experience that an hour is a good starting place but if that seems too much, then start with half an hour.If you don't have an hour for God,
I hope you had a thankful day yesterday. Actually, I hope you have a thankful day every day. You know why? Because thankfulness is powerful!I've been encouraging you to practice overflowing with thanksgiving, and yesterday I gave you four helpful hints on how to do that. But did you ever think about the power that is released when you become a thankful person? Let me tell you some of the great things that will happen: People will like you much better. Thankful people are nice to be around. Your relationships will improve. You'll have more friends. Your energy level will go up. It's true, because when you're thankful, you unleash a lot of good energy that is often wasted on complaining and negativism. You will do more work in less time. And that's going to make you a better employee, which will make your boss happy! I won't go so far as to say you'll get a raise, but then again—who knows? Your stress will go down. I'm not making this up, folks. When you are being thankful, you are thinking about the good things in your life, and that keeps you from focusing on the negative things. It's like a release valve on a pressure cooker—you will see your stress go down. Your face will be prettier—or more handsome, whichever you prefer! Think about it: when you are thankful, you're not worried or fretting, and those things cause lines in our faces and age us! You'll look younger! Your posture will improve. When you're thankful, you stand up straighter. When you're negative, your shoulders tend to stoop and your back curves.There's power in thankfulness. You have much to gain. But way above and beyond all of these, here's the most important reason to be thankful: You will honor and glorify Jesus Christ as he deserves. When you overflow with thankfulness, you tell the world what Jesus has done for you, and you are a good ambassador for him. Not to mention, it pleases him to see your thankful heart.Let's start a campaign to overflow with thankfulness. What a way to live.
This Thanksgiving holiday is a good time to remind us that we are to overflow with thanksgiving, as we read in Colossians 2.There is great power available to us when we are truly thankful people. But how do we make thankfulness a way of life for us? Here are some practical ways to learn to practice thanksgiving. Do the thankful alphabet. Start with A and go through Z, naming something starting with each letter for which you are thankful. You can have some fun with this; it's a great game to play in the car with your kids and you'll be teaching them to practice thankfulness. Make every Tuesday a Thankful Tuesday or each Thursday a Thankful Thursday. You can share this with your family or your co-workers and have some fun with it, but it will teach the joy of practicing thankfulness. Sing songs of thanksgiving. This week we'll all probably sing some of those traditional Thanksgiving hymns at our churches, like "We gather together to ask the Lord's blessing" and "Come, ye thankful people, come.” But how about all the other weeks of the year? You could sing "Give Thanks with a Grateful Heart.” How about "Count Your Blessings"? The Bible says to sing and make music in your heart to the Lord. Go for it. Begin every prayer time with thanksgiving. Probably the most famous Psalm—Psalm 100—tells us to enter the gates of the Lord with thanksgiving and enter his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. Whenever you enter into the presence of God, always enter with thanksgiving. Make the first words out of your mouth words of thankfulness.I have found that this changes my prayer time. If I begin with all my needs and requests, I am self-focused. If I begin with thanksgiving—reciting some of the many things I have to be thankful for—I am God-focused. What a difference that makes in my time spent with God, and that in turn makes a difference in my day. I begin to truly overflow with thankfulness.
Being thankful is not our natural condition. We have to choose to be thankful and we have to remember to be thankful and we have to work at being thankful.Many times, I have gone to Africa to conduct meetings there, and every year as I returned home, I was reminded of how much I have and how easy my life is compared to my friends in Africa. I would tell myself that I would never complain about anything again, but you know, after a few weeks if I wasn’t careful, I would fall back into my bad habits of complaining. If I want to be a truly thankful person—and I do—then I have to put disciplines in my life that will cause me to give thanks for everything and in everything.Here’s one suggestion that helps me to be a thankful person: Turn every complaint into a praise. When you start to complain about something, even if that complaint has already escaped your lips and you’ve just heard yourself utter those negative words, go back and replace them with words of thanksgiving. For example, You complained about the weather—it’s raining again, and you’ve had three days of rain, and you’re tired of the rain. As soon as you hear those words of complaint, replace them with thankful words: You know, this rain is good. I’m thinking of some places in Africa that are in a three-year drought. They would love to have this rain. Thank you, Lord, for this rain.Whether your complaint is just a thought in your mind or words you’ve expressed out loud, you need to replace those complaining words with words of thanksgiving. Of course, it’s better if you can catch yourself before you think or say those negative words, but even if you have already said them, I encourage you to teach yourself to replace them with thankfulness.You see, the power of thanksgiving is something we have to teach ourselves; it’s a gift we give ourselves, and we do this by becoming aware of every non-thankful thing we think and say and forcing ourselves to replace them with thankfulness. And the more you do that, the more it becomes a good habit which you just naturally do.
Would you like to have some power? I can tell you how to have more power in your life, because there is power in being thankful! And all of us can learn to be thankful. In writing to the new believers in Colosse, Paul said:“So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live in him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness” (Colossians 2:6-7).Thankfulness is powerful because it transforms our thinking, it keeps us from complaining, and it makes us joyful. Thankfulness unleashes God’s power in our lives; it is the foundation of joy, and the joy of the Lord is our strength. Without joy we are weak. What wipes out our joy? Complaining, feeling sorry for ourselves, focusing on the negative aspects of our lives. But thankfulness replaces all these negatives and restores our joy, which makes us strong and powerful.Paul said we should overflow with thankfulness. And to the Ephesians he wrote:“Always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ” (Ephesians 5:20).When you and I are thankful for everything, we affirm the sovereignty of God in our lives. When you can be thankful for everything—the good and the bad—it means that you believe God is in control, even when bad things happen to you. That kind of thankfulness—giving thanks for everything—is so powerful. It means that the enemy of your soul cannot defeat you, no matter what happens, because you are going to give a sacrifice of thanksgiving even in the tough places.In addition, when you are thankful, you affirm that you know and believe that God cares for you. Did you know that one of the greatest challenges to your faith is to believe that God doesn’t care? Satan wants you to believe that God doesn’t really care about you because then you will lose your joy and be defeated. Being thankful affirms that you believe God cares for you, which he does.
We will no doubt enjoy the traditions that usually accompany this Thanksgiving holiday—great food, time with family and friends, watching football games—but will we give any thought at all to being thankful?Did you ever realize that there is great power in thankfulness? Interestingly, there has been a great deal of research into the science of gratitude, and much time and money has been spent to find out what difference it makes in the life of a person who is intentionally thankful. And these studies have discovered that a thankful person is twenty-five percent happier than a non-thankful person!When I read about these studies, I thought: Why didn’t they ask me? I could have told them that. Or better still: Why didn’t they just go to the Word of God? Time and again it tells us about the power of thankfulness.In the Old Testament the people of Israel were instructed to bring thank offerings, sacrifices that were presented to God, to give thanks for his goodness.“Sacrifice thank offerings to God, fulfill your vows to the Most High” (Psalm 50:14).Now, a sacrifice meant they had to bring something they owned to the altar of God and offer it as a thank offering. Why do you think God instituted the thank offering? Because the people of Israel—like us—were very prone to grumble and complain and they needed to be reminded that they should be thankful people.The power of thankfulness is the power to change our attitude, to change our thought patterns, to change our focus—and that changes us. You see, thankfulness cannot coexist with griping and complaining. You just can’t complain and give thanks at the same time. So, thankfulness drives out the negative thinking and causes us to be focused on the blessings of our lives.But like the people of Israel, we need lots of reminders to be thankful people. So, I’m going to remind us all that if we truly are thankful people, not only will we be happier, but more importantly, we’ll be pleasing to the Lord. For today, would you give a thank offering right now? Just say—out loud if possible—one thing you are thankful for.
Mary Lowman and Lauren Stibgen talk about having a heart to serve other female Christian executives. Lauren discusses her journey as a working woman, challenges she has faced, the importance of coming into the office with a servant’s mentality, and how her primary vocation is ultimately to glorify God at work. She also shares how she prays and praises with other women at work and how it makes a difference.
(presented by Lauren Stibgen)As I sit here, I must admit I have the Sunday Scaries. Those thoughts leading into a new work week, wondering how Monday will launch. Even if you don’t work a traditional Monday-Friday, I am sure you know the feeling. Even if you find yourself in a season where you are between jobs, stress can steal your peace.The stress we experience as working women is arguably only sometimes about work. Some of us are the main breadwinner, perhaps facing single motherhood, illness of a spouse or loved one, needs for childcare, needs to care for an aging parent, or even mounting household issues. The truth is, we carry all this around, on top of the to do list we face waking up to another Monday.Jesus knew what we faced in the world. He even acknowledges this in John 14:27, “Peace I leave with you. Not as the world gives, do I give to you.” Not as the world—if our Lord Jesus is telling us the world will not bring peace, we should not expect it but for in seeking him.The good news is that Jesus tells us to come to him and rest (Matthew 11:28). I have found that one of the best ways to do that is through prayer.Philippians 4:6-7 tells us:“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication, let your requests be known to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.”Scripture shows us that some many of those closest to the Lord cried out to him in distress. David cries out to the Lord, Job in his distress is in constant prayer, and perhaps our greatest example of crying out to the Lord is Jesus himself. When the mighty didn’t have peace, they cried to the Lord for comfort.
(presented by Lauren Stibgen)Some days, I just feel alone. Living out your faith at work can sometimes seem difficult, especially if you don’t have someone to share it with. One of the ways I have found that I can live out my faith at work, is to pray for the lost.“Then he said to his disciples, “The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field” (Matthew 9:37-38).It occurs to me that one of the reasons I often feel alone at work is because I look at my “labor” or “work” incorrectly. As we can see in this verse from Matthew, the laborers are few. Few. As I consider my true work, it really isn’t about what I am doing at my desk.I am called to work hard at everything to bring glory to the Lord, but my focus should be on the harvest. Knowing I am one of the few in labor for His kingdom, I also need to be in prayer for how others see me at work. How am I fulfilling the greatest commandment to love the Lord my God with all of my heart, soul and mind, and to love my neighbor as myself? I need to start with thinking of my superiors, colleagues, and subordinates as my neighbors.The word love sounds deep for some workplaces, but I want to challenge you that one of the ways you can love at work, without anyone knowing is to pray for those around you. Maybe you start praying for someone in need in secret, but eventually ask if you can pray for them. Simply knowing you are praying can give someone comfort—even if they don’t have faith like you do.And don’t worry about offending someone. I have found that they will let you know if they don’t want prayer…yes, I have had someone tell me NOT to pray.Praying for others is one way to show others the love of Christ, but we can also pray for how we reflect Christ and attract others. 2 Corinthians 4:6 tells us that light shall shine out of darkness…give light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ.”Pray for your words. This may seem simple, but gossip and unkindness find their way into the workplace quickly. You can pray that “no corrupting talk comes from your mouth, but only what is good for building up” (Ephesians 4:29).Pray for your excellence. Often, we wake up and don’t know how we will show up to work. Maybe it is a project we don’t love, or a deadline that is causing stress.Pray for God to send someone to you—to send you the lost. I have made this prayer a constant, and God has shown up in a bold way. More than one woman has hopped on a prayer call, and remarked, that they joined not knowing why, or having found the call by happenstance.Jesus tells us that there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over the ninety-nice righteous persons who need repentance (Luke 15:7).More joy in heaven. Now this is something to pray for!Heavenly Father, give us hearts to seek the lost at work, and to reflect your glorious light that others know your glory in Christ Jesus!
(presented by Lauren Stibgen)Bold. Hungry. Looking for the next promotion. Achievement. How does the Lord call us to work? Is the title so important? Today we will explore how humility in prayer can help us shape ourselves into a humble worker for the Lord.Angry. Confused. The new woman that was hired was occupying the office and promotion she deserved. She resigned over a title and was determined to achieve this at another company until God wove humility into her heart as a result of prayer.Comparison robs us of humility, and often our drive for achievement places comparison smack in our face. Consider God’s word in Luke 18 about the two men who go up to the temple to pray. One, a Pharisee, “stood by himself” and compared himself to “other people” and spoke of his deeds to the Lord. The tax collector, on the other hand, “stood at a distance” with a lowly posture and asked God for mercy”. We learn that “all those that exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.”Humility itself is a foundation for prayer. It opens our heart to be clear of our position of reverence with the Almighty God. Your humble posture is opening your heart to allow God to change you. The beautiful part about being humble, is the expectation that we can have that God promises to exalt us and give us riches and honor of life.The promise is consistent throughout God’s word. In addition to the verses above in Luke, James 4:10 states, “Humble yourselves before the Lord and he will exalt you.” Proverbs, 22:4 “The reward for humility and fear of the Lord is riches and honor of life.”The exaltation may not be the title you expect, or the promotion you want, but we know He is working for our good. Remember, God can do far more abundantly than all we ask or think in the power of Jesus Christ our Lord (Ephesians 4:29).How can you humble yourself in prayer with the Lord? Is your posture keeping you from the beautiful expectation of exaltation, riches and honor?
(presented by Lauren Stibgen)Do words get in the way? Is there a right way to pray? One of the things I have found from praying for others and with others is that there are many people who don’t know where to start when it comes to prayer. The good news is God has provided wonderful encouragement throughout the scriptures that can guide us.So many acronyms are offered to help us “model” our words to the Lord. A dose of praise and reverence, some repentance, and often a request. But does it all need to flow together and be in the same pattern each time? It almost seems like a recipe.Recently I was joined by a friend and her husband for dinner. We enjoyed the meal, and a few weeks later, she asked me for my recipe because they had enjoyed the meal. I had to stop and think—I had no formal recipe for how I made this dish. Sometimes I weave a few different ideas together from what I find to make my own version. Like a recipe, prayer can be your own version.Sometimes when I simply don’t know what to pray for, I am encouraged that in Romans 8:26-27 I know that the Spirit helps us in our weakness. When we don’t know how to pray as we ought, the Spirit will intercede for us with groanings too deep for words.God doesn’t expect our prayers to be the same. He knows that the world will be bringing us different joys and different trials. Be encouraged that God wants ALL your requests (Philippians 4:7).One of the ways I have challenged myself in prayer is to better understand the names of God in the bible. It has opened my prayer life. God is a compassionate God. He is a God with care and kindness. In Exodus 34:6, the Lord passes in front of Moses proclaiming, “the Lord, the Lord, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness.”God is also my Helper. In both the Psalms and Hebrews 13:6 we see that “the Lord is my helper; I will not fear”.Thinking of God’s compassion and as my helper shapes my prayers differently. I know God sees my weakness and has mercy on me, and I can pray for his help during the day.Sometimes, I simply ask God to carry my burden. “Lord, can you carry this for me? I need your help.” In Matthew 6:8, I am reminded, He already knows what I need, and I don’t need to be specific.But I also know that God is Elohim—Mighty Creator. He is in all things, and I go to him with exceeding humility.
(presented by Lauren Stibgen)What do prayer and work have in common? For many years I separated my faith life from my work life. God was held for Sundays or my off hours, and prayer seemed like a bedtime activity. That was until I was convicted about prayer after completing a bible study on Elijah. Elijah only had what the Lord provided him.In just the few chapters of 1 Kings 17-19, we see how Elijah draws near to the Lord and must rely upon Him solely. We first see Elijah cry out to the Lord in a bold prayer for the life of the widow’s son. His prayer is answered.“The Lord heard Elijah’s cry, and the boy’s life returned to him, and he lived.” (1 Kings 17:22).His second bold prayer comes in Chapter 18 verses 36-37. In his repeating plea, “Answer me, O Lord, answer me…” we see that Elijah implores God to show that he is the Lord God by consuming a soaking wet offering with fire.In the book of James verse 5:17-18 we note that Elijah “was a man with a nature like ours”, and that he “prayed fervently”. How could changing my outlook on prayer change my work? I realized that Elijah’s “work” was from the Lord, and that mine was too. Prayer needed to be part of my work.On a red eye flight back to Chicago I scheduled my first prayer meeting for working women: Wednesday, lunch hour. It sounded good—mid week—get me through. I knew that I needed to pray for others and wanted others to pray for me. Would anyone show up?I prayed on that flight that, even if one woman came in need of prayer, that my heart would be filled with joy. Not just one, but four women joined, and we prayed. We prayed for opportunities, for difficult conversations and for feelings of hurt and rejection. For the last year, these midweek calls have become a part of my work, as I pray for the many needs and recount the answers to prayer and God’s goodness.“And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people” (Ephesians 6:18).We will continue to look at different ways to pray for your work, and how it will transform you, and bring you closer to God.
Some years ago, someone sent me this story, which illustrates this truth—that God won’t let you go. Let me share it with you.On a hot summer day in Florida, a little boy decided to go for a swim in the old swimming hole behind his house. He jumped into the water, not realizing that as he swam toward the middle of the lake, an alligator was swimming toward the shore.His father working in the yard saw what was happening, and in utter fear, he ran toward the water, yelling to his son. The little boy became alarmed and made a U-turn to swim to his father. It was too late. From the dock, the father grabbed his little boy by the arms just as the alligator snatched his legs.That began an incredible tug-of-war between the two. The alligator was much stronger than the father, but the father would not let go. A farmer happened to drive by, heard the screams, raced from his truck, took aim and shot the alligator.Remarkably, after weeks in the hospital, the little boy survived. His legs were extremely scarred by the vicious attack of the animal. And on his arms were deep scratches where his father's fingernails dug into his flesh in his effort to hang on to the son he loved.The newspaper reporter who interviewed the boy after the trauma asked if he would show him his scars. The boy lifted his pant legs. And then, with obvious pride, he said, "But look at my arms. I have great scars on my arms, too, because my Dad wouldn't let go."You and I can identify with that little boy. We have scars, too. No, not from an alligator, but the scars of a painful past as well as present troubles. Some of those scars are unsightly and have caused us deep pain or regret. But some wounds are because God has refused to let go. In the midst of our struggle, he's been there holding on to us,God just won't let you go, no matter what you're going through. Think of Joseph. Through no doubt some childish bragging to his brothers, they decided to get rid of him, and sold him into slavery in Egypt. Joseph had done no great evil; he didn't deserve to be so terribly mistreated, but there he was, a slave and a prisoner in Egypt.But God never let go of Joseph, because Joseph never forsook his faith in Jehovah God. And he was used by God to deliver many people, including his own family, from starvation. I wonder how many times, as he sat in that prison, he just wanted to give up. It looked hopeless, but God didn't let go.We have many wonderful illustrations in the Bible of how God didn't let go, even when his people foolishly waded into dangerous and sinful situations, sometimes out of ignorance, sometimes out of disobedience.Think of Elijah. You remember the story found in 1 Kings 18, where Elijah challenged all the prophets of Baal, with great courage, and their pagan gods could not deliver them. Elijah triumphed over all that evil, proving that Jehovah God was the only true god. It was an incredible victory.But the very next day, brave Elijah becomes a coward, fearful of one woman, Jezebel, who had threatened to kill him. And he starts running out of fear for his life. Elijah no doubt would have been diagnosed by doctors today as having a deep depression, even as being deluded, as he ran for his life.But God didn't let go, and with great patience and kindness, he nurtured him back to strength, taught kindness, he nurtured him back to strength, taught him some wonderful lessons, and brought him out of that deep funk an even better man of God—refined like gold.Are you there today? Has your faith failed you: are you full of fear? Are you in that kind of deep depression where everything looks hopeless, you feel feel worthless, and you're sure that life is coming to an end—at least life with any meaning? I can understand how the upside-down whole world we’re in today could cause you to be frightened and depressed. But I want to encourage you today to know that God won't let go of you.
Our friend Fran has been struggling with discouragement this week. You've been there, too, haven't you? Jesus has shown her several steps to take that will help defeat discouragement, including sharing her complains with him instead of with others, offering a sacrifice of praise, staying away from discouraging people, and just plain working hard.Now one of Fran's coworkers comes over to talk to her about a billing problem. Just as she is leaving, Fran feels an urge to ask her, "Sue, is everything okay? You look kinda down.""Huh—oh do I? I'm sorry, it's nothing..." she starts to leave."If you need to talk, I'm a good listener," Fran encourages her to open up."Oh, you don't want to hear my troubles, Fran," Sue says. But Fran insists that she does. So, Sue tells her about her problems with her husband. "I'm pretty sure he's got some affair going, Fran. He's never home; he makes up all these crazy excuses; and he never touches me anymore. He hardly speaks to me. I expect him to walk out on me and the kids any day now.""Sue, are you sure you're not just letting your imagination run wild on you?" Fran asks."No, that's what I thought for awhile, but a friend saw him in a bar a couple of times with this woman from his office. I think he's having the typical mid-life crisis, and he's going to dump me and the kids for some young bimbo," Sue says drearily.Fran talks with her a few more minutes, and then says, "Why don't you come over to my house tonight, and we can talk some more." Without realizing what she's done, Fran has reached out to someone else whose problem is much bigger than hers. Sue seems so appreciative. "Fran, I really didn't mean to dump on you, but I sure could use a friend.""You've got one, Sue. I'll see you tonight." After Sue leaves Fran spends a couple of minutes praying for her. Then she thinks to herself: “What happened to my discouragement?""You know, Lord,” she says to Jesus, "I almost forgot about the things that were bugging me. I mean, my problems look pretty small compared to Sue's."She remembers a verse from Proverbs 11:"A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed" (Proverbs 11:25).Again, Fran realizes, Jesus knows what he's talking about. And again, she acknowledges what a difference it makes to have Jesus by her side all the time. When she simply obeys him, he can take those discouraging feelings away and give her again the joy of her salvation.He's by your side, too, if you know him as your Savior. Why don't you practice his presence more every day?
Feeling discouraged? Our friend Fran is having some discouraging times. Jesus showed her how offering a sacrifice of praise—praising God with her mouth even though she didn't feel like it—would help her defeat discouragement. As she began to do that, it helped.Do you have to live or work with people who are discouragers? If you're around discouragers a lot, they can really discourage you. This is one eye-opening lesson Fran has to learn.Today she is working hard trying to catch up. The last couple of days, as she was fighting discouragement, she really wasn't motivated to work very hard, so now she's paying the price. But she notices that hard work helps her forget the discouragement.In the midst of her busy day, another coworker interrupts her. "Hey, Fran," Bill says, "did you hear the latest rumor? The company's up for sale and we'll probably be swallowed up by some giant holding company who'll let half the people go.""Oh, Bill, you're always coming up with rumors that aren't true and just getting everybody upset," Fran says, trying to dismiss him. But Bill is not easily dismissed. "I was right about the layoffs last year, wasn't I?" Fran has to admit he got that one right. "And I'm right about this, too, Fran. Believe me, I've got good sources."And on and on Bill goes about all the horrors that await them because of this potential buyout. The more he talks, the more discouraged Fran feels. By the time he leaves, she's ready to give up again."I've got to learn to ignore Bill," she says to herself. “He’s a very discouraging person who never has anything positive to say.”Again, Fran talks to herself: "You just can't afford to let discouraging people bring you down. Remember when Jairus asked Jesus to come heal his daughter, and his friends met them half-way to say never mind, she was dead already. Jesus told Jairus to ignore what they said and just believe. So, there are times when you must learn to ignore the discouraging people who tell you everything's bad," Fran reminds herself. This was something they talked about recently in her Bible study group, and the Spirit of God brought it to her mind just now.Are there some discouraging people around you? Avoid them; ignore them; tune them out. Certainly, we should never behave in rude ways, but we must protect our minds from the discouragement that others would heap upon us. That's an important step in defeating discouragement.
Fran is struggling with discouragement. I imagine you've been there at times yourself, so listen in to see how Jesus helps her learn to defeat discouragement.Last night Fran had unloaded all her problems on her friend, Louise, and Jesus reminded her it was a great deal better to tell him, rather than discourage others by complaining to them. After all, Jesus can handle it, and he can help.This morning, however, that discouraging feeling still lingers as she gets herself and the kids ready to leave the house. "Come on, kids," she says wearily, "you're both dragging your feet today. We're going to be late.""Lord, I just can't beat that discouraging feeling,” she tells Jesus as she drives to work. “Problems just don't go away that easily," she says. She feels guilty for feeling discouraged, but what can she do? She is discouraged.At that moment a song comes into her mind: “We give a sacrifice of praise. . ." She hums a few lines. “A sacrifice of praise. . . hmm. I guess I should praise the Lord,” she admits to herself. “But I don’t feel like praising God right now." As soon as she says it, she knows how wrong she is."I don't feel like it," she says to the Lord, "but that's what it means to give a sacrifice of praise—praising when you don't want to. It requires a sacrifice of my emotions.""Praise God," Fran mumbles to herself. She remembers her alphabet method, and halfheartedly, feeling like a hypocrite, she begins: "I praise you because you are A: Almighty; I praise you because you are B: Benevolent; I praise you because you are C: Caring; I praise you because you are D my Defense." And on she goes through the alphabet, praising God while driving down the road, forcing herself to offer a sacrifice of praise.As she pulls into the parking lot, she begins to feel a lighter spirit. Things don't look quite so bad. She has made some inroads toward defeating the discouragement that was making her so miserable.Are you discouraged today? Try a sacrifice of praise. It really does make a difference. The Psalmist said, "Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God" (Psalm 42:5).
How do you handle discouragement? Our friend, Fran, is facing some discouraging times right now, and Jesus is trying to help her see how she can defeat that discouragement in her life.The kids are finally in bed and Fran is having a conversation with Jesus about being discouraged. As she thinks about this further, she recognizes that discouragement is also one of the devil’s most effective weapons against believers. “I see lots of believers who never seem to have victory over discouragement, Lord," she continues her conversation with Jesus, “and I wonder why not? When does discouragement become sinful?”She thinks about all the bad things that have happened to her lately, and the discouraging feelings start to come over her again. “You know, Lord, it’s only human to be discouraged when all these things happen, which are beyond my control. I mean, I didn’t cause any of them and I don’t seem to be able to change any of them.”As Fran thinks about all this, the phone rings and it's her friend, Louise. "Oh, Louise, I'm just so discouraged," she says to her. "Did you hear I lost that account I've been working on; after all that work they went to the competition." She pauses. "Oh, sure, there are more fish in the sea, but tell me where," she replies to Louise in a rather sarcastic tone."And besides that, Drew is having problems at school," she says. "And I got my second notice of an overdue bill from the dentist today. I don't have the money to pay that bill this month. And to top it off, Debbie called to say she wouldn't be able to help me with children's church this year. I don't know, Louise, nothing's going right for me."She spends a few more minutes complaining to Louise, then hangs up. "Well, you sure unloaded on her," she hears that inner voice saying to her."Well, that's what friends are for, right?" Fran replies. "I've got to tell somebody."But as soon as she says it, her heart is convicted. “Why did I unload on Louise like that? She called to have a nice conversation with me—in fact, I don’t really know why she called. I didn’t give her a chance to say. I just dumped my discouragement on her and probably succeeded in discouraging her, too.”Fran feels so badly about the way she complained to Louise. “Lord,” she says, “you are my wonderful counselor, my friend, and I should go to you with my discouragement, not to poor Louise." She remembers the passage from Psalm 142, which says,"I pour out before him my complaint; before him I tell my trouble" (Psalm 142:2).If you're discouraged today, tell Jesus; nobody else, just Jesus. He can handle it, and he can help.
I continue our story of Fran and Jesus on the Job. I began these stories several years ago to help us learn to practice the presence of Jesus in our lives, no matter where we are or what we're doing. Fran communicates with Jesus throughout her day, and I hope her story will encourage you to be more aware of his presence in your life."Drew, I said, it's time to go to bed right now, and I don't want to hear any more whining from you," Fran says to her son as she wearily tries to get him in bed. At the end of a hard day, the last thing she wants is an argument with her son. Finally, the house is quiet, and she flops down in a chair. "Oh, that I had wings like a dove; I would fly away and be at rest," she quotes out loud from a Psalm, with a sarcastic tone of voice.As she often does, Fran talks to the Lord about how she feels. She has learned that since he knows everything she’s thinking and feeling, she might as well get it out in the open and talk to him about it."Lord,” she says, “I guess I’m a little discouraged, and I don’t really even know why. I guess it’s just me; it’s probably nothing,” and she tries to dismiss the topic. But the Spirit of the Lord keeps probing her mind: "What’s causing these feelings of discouragement? Was it something that happened today?""Today—yesterday—tomorrow," Fran says with exasperation. "It's just life in general. I lost that account yesterday; they went with a competitive firm. Drew is having some trouble at school—goofing off, his teacher says. I still haven't paid the dentist bill from last month. My friend at church says she can't help me with the children's church this year, like she promised she would. And well, I'm just tired of all the responsibility. I'm tired of being mother and father and career woman and...."She thinks about that awhile, then says to the Lord, "I guess I’m just discouraged; can you understand that?”She begins to think about Jesus while he was here on earth, and she remembers that often he would seem to be a bit exasperated and—yes—maybe even discouraged with his disciples. "I guess being discouraged is not necessarily a sin," she concludes. “In fact, you warned us, Lord that in this world we would have tribulations and discouragements. But you also said that we can overcome the world." Quietly Fran prays, “Lord, teach me how to overcome my own discouragements, which are pretty small compared to others, I know. But they seem big to me right now. Please help me, Lord.”
In part one, Fran had started her week off very poorly. Fran is a single mom, having been widowed at a very early age when her husband was killed in an accident. She is raising her two school-age children alone and at the same time holding down a busy job in marketing.In telling these stories, you’ll notice that Jesus speaks to Fran. Now, we know that Jesus does not speak to us in audible words, as in these stories, but I use this to illustrate that Jesus is with us at all times because his Spirit dwells with every truly born-again person, and he does speak to us through his Word and his Spirit. So, when you hear dialog spoken by Jesus, be assured it is all true to principles in Scripture, and it is used to help us learn how to practice the presence of Jesus in our everyday lives.On this particular Monday morning, Fran felt very unmotivated and started her day late. Then she had heated words with her children in getting them off. As Jesus rode with her to the job, she was very uncomfortable having him there because his presence convicted her of her harsh tongue. And then Jesus asked her about her argument with her mother the previous evening.Fran's mother was unhappy because Fran was beginning to date a man who was not a believer. Fran had accused her of meddling and hung up rather abruptly. Then upon arriving at work, she had very harsh words with a co-worker who phoned to say he couldn't make a deadline. And this was a co-worker she had been talking with lately and sharing her faith in Jesus.After all this, Fran breaks into tears, shuts her office door, and admits she has blown it. She asks Jesus to please forgive her. And of course, he does.She shakes her head. "You always forgive me so readily, and it seems I have to ask for forgiveness a lot. I've hurt you; I know I have. I really am sorry. Please forgive me.""No need to ask again; you're forgiven," Jesus replies. "But it might be helpful to trace the root cause of all these angry outbursts and ask yourself how it happened. Can you remember when they began?""They began a couple of weeks ago, I think, about the time I started seeing...” The truth comes out slowly and painfully for Fran. "I knew it wasn't a good idea for me to date Bob. He's not a Christian; I know that, and yet he's very sophisticated and successful. I guess I was just flattered by his attention, and it felt good to be treated so nicely," Fran explains."But you knew in your spirit that I was not pleased with this relationship, is that right, Fran?" Jesus probes further."Yes, I knew. But I tried to ignore it; stay busy; rationalize it away. That's why I was so angry at mother; she forced me to face it," Fran explains to Jesus."Disobedience is so insidious, Fran. It affects everything else, like a cancer that spreads lightning fast. Do you see what this one area of disobedience has done, even in two short weeks? Your fellowship with me has been broken, and you've hurt quite a few people as well.” Jesus spells it out for her."Yeah, I know," Fran says. "The thing is, although I was doing what I wanted to do, I was pretty miserable on the inside. I was determined to do it, but it didn't really bring me any happiness or great thrill like I thought it would.”"Well," Jesus replies, "that's because you have an enemy who is a great liar, and he will always lead you to believe that doing it your way will make you happy and doing it my way will make you miserable. He handed you one of his most common lies, and you fell for it. Lots of people have. It's okay; you're forgiven," Jesus reassures her."I know you forgive me, but how do I undo all this damage I've done to others?" Fran asks with alarm. "I've really blown it. I mean, the way I talked to Al just now—and just last week I was sharing something about the Lord with him. He'll never listen to me again. I've ruined my testimony," Fran panics as she thinks about it."Well,
I wonder if you’ve counted your blessings lately. That old hymn of the church reminds us to count our blessings, name them one by one, count our blessings and see what God has done! You know, in a world that is full of trouble, it’s easy to overlook our blessings. I’ve been encouraging you to become a give-away blesser—someone who blesses others freely and frequently, because you have been so greatly blessed by God. As the saying goes, we are blessed to be a blessing. We have created a lovely set of 31 cards with give-away blessings on them, scripture verses, that can be given to someone to bless them, to encourage them, to lighten their load. You can find these cards on our website. All you have to do is print them and give them away. Dr. Robert Cook has gone on to be with the Lord, but for years he would end his radio broadcast each day by saying, “Walk with the King today and be a blessing." That’s what we all need to do—be a blessing to others. One of these give-away blessing cards says, “Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see,” from Hebrews 11. At times our faith can waver, can it not? I know mine does. What a blessing it would be to give this card to someone who is struggling to believe that God has heard their prayer, that God is concerned about their need, that God hasn’t forgotten them. You could bless someone with this give-away blessing. Another one of these 31 cards has a portion of 1 Corinthians 13: “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. . . Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres." Wouldn’t it be a blessing to give this card to someone who has loved you with this kind of love. It could be a good friend, a mate, a parent—whoever God puts on your heart. You could say, “Thanks so much for loving me like this.” Well, I’ve tried to give you some ideas of how you could become a blessing, as an act of gratitude to God for all your blessings. And you know, when we start looking for ways to bless others, it just comes right back to us. We reap what we sow, and you will be blessed beyond belief as you determine to become a better blesser!
Have you been blessed by God? I would hope that all of us would quickly agree that God has blessed us richly. When God called Abram to leave his country and go to the land he would show him, he said, “I will make you into a great nation and I will bless you; I will make your name great, and you will be a blessing.” As believers in Jesus Christ, we are blessed to be a blessing. Not just to enjoy God’s blessings to us, but to be able to pass a blessing on to others. Have you ever intentionally determined that you wanted to be that kind of Christian who blesses others? You know, if you don’t find a practical way to be a blessing, or you don’t remind yourself to bless others, you can go through your days just self-focused and self-centered, and never blessing anyone else. So, I’ve been encouraging you to give away blessings. In fact, we’ve prepared a set of 31 lovely cards, each with a scriptural blessing on it, to help you become more intentional about giving away blessings. Those are now on our website here. Here’s a good blessing to give someone. “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit” (Romans 15:13). We all lose hope from time to time. No doubt you know someone who is losing hope right now; they’ve lost their job, or lost their home, or some other problem just won’t go away, and they’re ready to give up. Suppose you gave them this card with this give-away blessing and let them know you are praying that God will fill their hearts with hope and they won’t give up. I know you would be a blessing to that person. If you know someone who is a little confused about what they are supposed to do, or feels inconsequential with low self-esteem, you might want to give them this card from Ephesians 2:10, which says, “We are God’s workmanship created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." This is one of my favorite verses, for it says that every child of God is here with a distinct and specific purpose, designed by God. Giving a person this card with words of encouragement from you could make a huge difference in their attitude. If you’d like to do a better job of blessing others, then go to our website and print this set of 31 cards with give-away blessings on them. You won’t regret it.
Can you think of a time when someone lifted your spirits and made your day by a small act of kindness? When that happens, you are blessed! Well, I’m suggesting that as Christians we need to be blessing others. And to help us get in the habit of giving away blessings, we have designed a set of 31 lovely cards—a whole month of blessings with a short Bible verse, which you can give away to someone, as God leads you. They’re on our website now for you to print and give away. For example, if someone has worked really hard and completed a difficult task, you could give the card which says, “Well done, good and faithful servant. . . Come and share your master’s happiness!” from Matthew 25. Along with the card you could give words of blessing, as you compliment that person on work well done. It could be a coworker or a child who just improved his grades at school or a mate who completed a tough assignment. Don’t you think that would be a blessing to them? You know, there’s always people in our churches who are the servant people—the ones who are doing the “dirty work,” the behind-the-scenes work, and are so very faithful. They don’t get a lot of recognition. Suppose you gave that person the card, which says, “Serve one another in love,” while thanking them for their life of service. I can only imagine how blessed they would be, just to know their service is noticed and appreciated. There could be an occasion where your word of blessing could be a challenge to a person, at just the right moment, given in the right spirit. Take this give-away card, which says, “Forgive as the Lord forgave you." This little card, given with words of encouragement and understanding, empathizing with the difficulty of forgiveness but helping them remember that they will find freedom through forgiveness—well, it could really be a blessing to them, don’t you think? There are so many people in my life who have blessed me and continue to do so. I just don’t know how I would carry on without them. We need each other. And we can be a blessing to others. So, be a blessing today. You’ll find this set of 31 cards to help you develop this gift of giving away blessings here.
We often say “Bless you” when someone sneezes. But wouldn’t it be a lot more meaningful if we did more than just utter a cliché and instead, we became intentional about giving away blessings? That’s what I’m encouraging you to do, and to help you get in the habit, we’ve designed a set of 31 lovely cards, each with a verse of Scripture, which you can use to give away a blessing, and you’ll find those here. For example, you might give someone this blessing, from Song of Songs, which says, “Flowers appear on the earth; the season of singing has come." In fact, for an extra measure, you could give the card with a flower, and simply say, “I thought you might like a reminder of God’s beautiful creation. Flowers really can put a song in your heart, don’t you think?" Even if that person is not yet a believer in Jesus Christ, they would so appreciate a blessing like that. It’s small, but it says, “I thought of you; I care about you; I bless you." It’s a give-away blessing! Another one of these cards has the verse from Romans 8, which says, “We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." That would be a wonderful blessing to give to a fellow-believer, perhaps your pastor or someone on your church staff who is going through some tough times. They might really appreciate just a reminder that God is working for their good. I wonder if you know someone who is really worried right now? Maybe they’re waiting on some test results from the doctor, or they think they might get laid off from their job. It could be a blessing to give them this card which says, “Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." You may have a family member who needs encouragement, your mother or father or sibling. Sometimes we overlook those closest to us, and they need blessings too. Another card says, “Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful,” from Hebrews 10. That could be such a sweet give-away blessing for the right person at the right time. If you really want to become someone who blesses others, these give-away blessings will help you develop that spiritual discipline. This set of 31 cards is here, free for you to print and give away. I hope you’ll do that.
How often do you give away a blessing? We have lots of examples in the Bible of blessing and being blessed. There are many verses in the Psalms which talk about how God blesses us: “For surely, O Lord, you bless the righteous; you surround them with your favor as with a shield” (Psalm 5:12). And there are passages where we bless the Lord: “Bless the Lord, O my soul, and all that is within me, bless his holy name” (Psalm 103:1). But did you know that we can bless others by some act or word of kindness or encouragement? I want to talk about give-away blessings, to encourage us all to become very intentional about giving a blessing to others, in word or deed. In fact, we have designed a set of 31 lovely cards, a month’s worth of blessings you can give away. They’re linked here for you to access and use. Each card has a verse on it, and that word from God could be a great blessing to the right person at the right moment. For example, one card says, “Carry each other’s burdens." You could give that card to someone who is carrying a heavy burden of some sort. And as you hand it to that person, you could simply say, “I know you’ve got a heavy burden on your heart right now. I just want you to know that I’m carrying it with you; I’m praying for you, and I care." That simple give-away blessing could make a world of difference to that person. Or you might want to encourage a good friend of yours, a friend who has stood with you through happy times and sad times, a friend you cherish and appreciate. The give-away blessing you could choose for that friend says, “A friend loves at all times,” from Proverbs 17. It would give you an opportunity to thank your friend for all the times she has loved you and helped you. Would you like to get in the habit of giving away blessings? What a wonderful way to become encouragers and to be ambassadors for Jesus Christ, where you work, where you live—anywhere that God directs you to give away a blessing. If that is something you’d like to do, and you will indeed give away these cards as God directs, then you’ll find these cards with give-away blessings here. Easy to print and give to others.
Jesus often taught with parables—stories that illustrated his message. It's a very effective teaching method, and so this on-going story of Fran will hopefully help us see a biblical truth more clearly.Also, we need to learn how to practice the presence of Jesus on a daily basis. We know that the Spirit of God is with us continually when we're born from above, but too many Christians don’t seem to be truly aware of his presence and the power available to them because he is right there beside us. I hope these stories help us learn to practice the presence of Jesus all the time.We know that Jesus doesn’t speak to us in audible words, but his Spirit within us can definitely give us clear guidance, which is always based on the truth of Scripture. So, the words of Jesus which I’ve written in this dramatic setting are all true to Scripture.Fran has had quite a few struggles on her job, but each time God has made a way and helped her do the right thing. This Monday morning, as she wakes to face another day, Fran is totally unmotivated. Nothing in her wants to get up and get going. So, she waits until the last minute, then gets up in a rush. Getting her two kids ready to go to school turns out to be a bigger chore than usual and she ends up raising her voice and arguing with them as she hurries them to get going. It's not a good start for her week.As she maneuvers through the bumper-to-bumper commute, she remembers that Jesus is there beside her, going to work with her again. "Good morning," he says cheerily. "Morning," Fran replies, hoping there won't be any conversation. She's not in the mood."Not a great Monday start, huh Fran?" Jesus asks. She forces a smile but still keeps quiet. She had intended, as usual, to spend some quiet time with Jesus early in her day, but she missed it today. Well, that happens sometimes, and Jesus will just have to understand. Fran thinks to herself."You seem a little angry this morning, Fran," Jesus comments. "Do you know why?""No. I'm not angry; just tired. Guess I'm not in the mood to talk much," she answers."Could it be the argument you had on the phone last night with your mother? There were some pretty strong words between you.” Jesus keeps pushing Fran to talk to him.Now she is visibly angry. The last thing she wants to think about is the fight she had with her mother last night. But she tries to cover up her feelings and says, "Well, we just don't see eye-to-eye on everything and sometimes Mom tries to tell me what to do. I'm a grown woman and I don't like to be told what to do," and even as she says the words, she's knows how bad they sound."Do you think you treated her with respect, since she is your mother?" Jesus probes.Fran doesn't like it when Jesus starts asking these kinds of questions. She squirms a little as she weaves in and out through traffic, trying to be preoccupied with her driving and ignore Jesus. But he won't let her do that."I'm sure you don't always agree, but were those harsh words necessary, Fran?""Okay, okay, Jesus. I'll call her today and apologize. It's my fault; it's always my fault!" Fran responds in frustration."I don't think an apology will do much good with that attitude, Fran," Jesus replies, as they turn into the parking lot at the office. Fran is relieved they are there because she really doesn't want to talk about this anymore. She said she'd apologize; what more does Jesus want?As they walk into the office, Fran finds a notice on her desk that a prospect has cancelled an appointment with her today. "Oh, good grief," Fran exclaims. "I've waited two weeks for this appointment, got everything ready, and now he cancels.” She slams her attaché on her desk and turns to take off her coat."Oh, I'm sorry, Lord, I forgot...” her voice trails off."You forgot I was here? That's okay, Fran. But I am here, even when you forget," Jesus says to her calmly.Fran feels very ashamed, but what can she say?
Would you have ever guessed that a man from the Old Testament could offer us a godly role model for Christians in the marketplace today? Daniel is that man. If you haven’t read the book of Daniel lately, I encourage you to do so, because there’s so much there to encourage you in your life today.As you read his story, you will see that: Daniel’s greatest testimony was his work habits and dedication to doing his job right.“Now Daniel so distinguished himself among the administrators and the satraps by his exceptional qualities that the king planned to set him over the whole kingdom” (Daniel 6:3). This caused much jealousy among the satraps, so they set out to find something against Daniel in his conduct of government affairs, but they were unable to do so.“They could find no corruption in him, because he was trustworthy and neither corrupt nor negligent” (Daniel 6:4b).What a testimony! Neither corrupt nor negligent. I never really think of myself as corrupt, do you? Yet let’s take a look at what comes under the heading of corrupt: guilty of dishonest practices like cheating on the expense account, using company assets for your own benefit, disloyal to your employer, giving reports that exaggerate the good and overlook the bad, to name a few.And even if we pass the corrupt test, here comes “never negligent.” You mean, never neglecting to do what you’re supposed to do? Never failing to give it all you’ve got? Never failing to fulfill promises and follow-up as required? Never overlooking the stuff you hate to do and leaving it undone? Never?I’m guilty! I wouldn’t want my work habits to be as closely scrutinized as Daniel’s were. With all those satraps looking for something to hang him with, they could find nothing.Do you see why Daniel gives us such a great role model of a Christian working in the secular workplace?
Let me ask you, do you thoroughly like and enjoy everyone you work with and for? I hope so; that would be ideal. But it’s often true that you have certain coworkers who aren’t so easy to like.Daniel had some very difficult coworkers too, people who were out to do him harm. People who were very jealous of him and wanted to bring him down. But in spite of their attitudes, Daniel kept his attitude right: Daniel had a compassionate heart for his “co-workers.”When Nebuchadnezzar was ready to kill the wise men of Babylon because they could not interpret his dream, Daniel went to Arioch, the commander of the king’s guard, and interceded for these men. “Why did the king issue such a harsh decree?” he asked. Now, these men meant nothing to him personally, but he had a compassionate heart, and he knew it was wrong to execute them. So, he went to his trusted fellow-Israelites, Hananiah, Mishael and Azariah, and urged them to pray for these men. God then revealed the meaning of the dream to Daniel and the next day he asked Arioch not to kill the wise men, but instead to take him to Nebuchadnezzar because he could interpret the dream (Daniel 2).Talk about sticking your neck out! Daniel was a man of great courage as well as great compassion. He cared about these men, even though they were not fellow-Israelites and indeed were astrologers and sorcerers and enchanters—men who were doing things directly opposed to God’s principles.It’s not easy to have compassion for people sometimes, is it? Especially those who are antagonistic toward us, or who have no clue about true spirituality. Those whose lifestyles are sinful and against all you know to be right. But as God placed Daniel in the midst of these kind of people, so he does us as well, and he does it so we can show God’s love and compassion to people who have no clue what it’s all about.
Do you sometimes feel very out-of-place in your work environment? Because we live and work in a fallen world, we are often painfully reminded that as disciples of Jesus Christ, we just don’t fit in socially and culturally. Daniel had that same experience, as he was taken to a foreign land. But there in the midst of a totally secular and pagan culture, he stayed true to his biblical principles and did not allow the culture around him to drag him down to its level.Daniel was deeply influenced by a letter the prophet Jeremiah sent to the exiles. In Daniel 9:2 we read: “In the first year of his reign, I, Daniel, understood from the Scriptures, according to the word of the Lord given to Jeremiah the prophet, that the desolation of Jerusalem would last seventy years.” That letter, being prophetic in nature, was the Word of God.This is what the Lord Almighty, the God of Israel, says to all those I carried into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon: “Build houses and settle down; plant gardens and eat what they produce. Marry and have sons and daughters. . . Increase in number there; do not decrease. Also, seek the peace and prosperity of the city to which I have carried you into exile. Pray to the Lord for it, because if it prospers, you too will prosper” (Jeremiah 29:4-7).Notice that Daniel and his close friends were to serve the Lord right there in Babylon, while they were in exile. They were to prosper and work and be involved in the society around them.I believe God intends for his children to be involved in the pagan culture around us—to work in that culture and be a light in that culture and even be successful in that culture. But we’re never to compromise and adopt the sinful ways of the culture. In the world but not of the world—that is our challenge. Daniel and his three close friends were able to do it very well.And you’ll note that Daniel knew the Word of God as delivered by the Prophet Jeremiah. Undoubtedly that was one of the main reasons he could make it in that culture, because he knew and believed the Word of God. We have it a bit easier because we have the whole written Word of God, and when we make that an integral part of our lives, it fortifies us to be strong for the Lord and stand true to his principles, as Daniel did.
Did you ever think that an Old Testament saint could be a great role-model for you as a Christian in the marketplace today? I can assure you that Daniel is that man. We’re looking at workplace principles from the life of Daniel. Consider this: Daniel was taken completely out of his comfort zone, away from familiar people and surroundings, into a different culture altogether.When you go to work each day, you are likely to be leaving your comfort zone and entering a different kind of world—maybe a pagan world. The pagan gods may be a bit different today, but they are there: The god of materialism and success The god of “I have my own truth” The god of sexual pleasure The god of any kind of pleasure The god of “it’s all about me”Our challenge is to remain true to the Lord even though we may work in Satan’s territory. Daniel—and his three faithful friends—were fully immersed in a pagan culture. They worked hard and succeeded in that society. But they did not accommodate their lifestyles or beliefs to the pagan world around them. Their approach was obedient involvement. They stayed involved in the world, while at the same time remaining obedient to God and his principles.Have you ever felt like a foreigner in your working world? Well, that’s because you are, if you’re a Christ-follower. This world is not your home. Peter wrote that we are a chosen people, a royal priesthood a holy nation, a people belonging to God. He goes on to remind us that we are aliens and strangers in this world (1 Peter 2:9).But Jesus has you there—in that pagan culture—for a purpose. And when you keep a joyful spirit, it is one of the most powerful weapons you have, both to fight off the enemy, to sustain you—because the joy of the Lord is our strength—and to testify to those around you that you have a good reason to be joyful.
As Christians in the marketplace, we face a continual challenge of walking that fine line between pursuing our careers and seeking success and being a strong witness for Christ where we work. Integrating our work and our faith is not the easiest thing to do, is it? The choices are not always black and white; the decisions are not always clear. And while we may not have gone to a foreign country and culture as a missionary, there are times when it sure feels like we’re outsiders, foreigners in a culture that is opposed to Christian principles.The story of Daniel offers us some very important principles for workplace Christians. Let me point out some of the issues that Daniel faced which are not that far from the ones we encounter. Daniel was forced into a job he never chose nor ever wanted.Daniel’s story begins on a very bleak note. He was taken as a captive—a slave—to another country. He had no choice. But even when evil seemed to be in control, God was working out his purposes. And through it all, Daniel kept a positive outlook.Do you ever feel that you’ve been placed in a position you never aspired to? Have you ever felt trapped in your job or your company? When you find yourself in that kind of predicament, it’s very easy for your attitude to go south very quickly.Even if you’re in a job of your choosing, there are days when you still feel trapped—when you have dreams of running away, catching the next flight out to a far-away place! But it is exactly in these times that the real depth of your faith shows through. Staying positive and joyful in a place where you may not want to be is a sign of a Spirit-controlled life, and it is a strong testimony for the Lord. Daniel had God-given talents and skills, which he had honed. He was a good steward of his gifts and opportunities.God had endowed Daniel with a very bright and quick mind, and Daniel had taken that gift and made the most of it, even in a hostile environment. Paul wrote to Timothy, “For this reason, I remind you to fan into a flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands” (2 Timonthy 1:6). Have you fanned into a flame the gifts and talents God has placed in you? It’s easy to just settle with getting by. But I’m often convicted that God expects me to take my gifts and make them better. You and I will be accountable for the stewardship of our talents and skills.Daniel learned how to live his faith in a secular culture. His culture could not have been further from the truth or be more corrupt. Yet he remained true. How did he do it?
Presented by Lisa BishopWhen you think about God, what three adjectives come to mind? Would you use the word “kind” to describe God?The kindness of God is an expression of his love that heals wounds, reconciles relationships, and brings hope to the hopeless. God’s kindness transforms lives and as his followers, we have the privilege and responsibility to dispense kindness to people at work, at home, in our schools and communities, to everyone around us.Kindness is not always my default, but as followers of Jesus, kindness is not a suggestion; we are called to show the glory and kindness of God through our words, actions, and behaviors.Have you jumped on the Wordle bandwagon yet? Ok - that question is not a serious one, but if you don’t know what Wordle is, it's a web-based word game where players have six attempts to guess a five-letter word. Several of my family members have been playing and we have created a text chain to share our results each day. Sometimes if someone gets really lucky they can guess the five-letter word in 2 tries, other times it can take 4, 5, or 6 guesses. And if you fail to guess the word in 6 tries you essentially lose the game. It’s quite nerve wracking if I do say so myself, especially when you get to the 5th try and your Wordle fate hangs in the balance. Will I guess the word in 6 tries or fall off the Wordle cliff in defeat? The stakes are higher when playing with other people who are all vying for who can guess the word in the fewest attempts.So what does Wordle have to do with the kindness of God?Unlike Wordle, God is not six tries and you’re out. No matter how many times you fail, falter or flub, the lovingkindness of God lavishes all who love and follow Jesus. So if you have ever felt like you have gotten on God’s last nerve or “this time he is really going to come down hard on you,” it simply isn’t true. While you may at times feel like God is a punitive God, he’s not. This false belief is something I wrestle with. I can still find it hard to grasp that God is not mad at me when I screw up. Or that he is not going to hold my ungodly words or actions over my head as leverage to get me to do better.Now don’t get me wrong; there is a consequence to sin. When we act in ways that are unbecoming of a follower of Jesus and when others sin, there are ramifications.The kindness of God is not a blank check for sin, it does not condone sin or give license to indulge in or overlook it.Romans 2:4 says: Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, forbearance and patience, not realizing that God’s kindness is intended to lead you to repentance?God’s goodness is meant to lead you and me to repentance; a change of heart and a turning away from self to making an about face towards God. And this is not God penalizing you; it’s actually very loving of God because he knows that when you and I live in holiness and according to his perfect will, that is where true freedom and joy is found.Sometimes we confuse the impact of our actions and the aftermath of poor choices with punishment from God. When we experience pain, frustration, failure, disappointment, and disillusionment in life, we often default to blaming God. When things do not go the way we want, we can sometimes neglect to see our part in misgivings.Hear me when I say that not everything bad or undesirable that happens in your life is a result of your poor actions and decisions. The reality is we live in a corrupt world and our actions and the sinful actions of others have an impact. What I am suggesting is that we often have a wrong view of God. We think that he is unloving, harsh, punitive, and unkind, waiting to whack us when we veer off track. But the Bible tells us something different about the character of God.It is super important that you and I have a correct view of God because what we believe about God will determine how we live. Your understanding of God’s nature and his disposit...
(presented by Lisa Bishop)We have been exploring the importance of kindness and I want to throw down a kindness challenge. Before I do let’s take a look at what Titus 3:4-5 tells us about kindness: But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit. I want to take a look at those verses because they point out something very important when it comes to the kindness you and I are given by God. The kindness and love that Jesus demonstrates toward us is not something we deserved. His kindness is not based on our merit but on his mercy. In other words, you and I did not earn God’s kindness, it was freely given, not based on conditions. How often do you extend kindness to someone only if they “deserve it.” When a coworker is off-putting or a person is annoying, in our flesh we are not bent toward kindness. Our tendency is avoidance, irritation, or the cold shoulder. Some form of withholding patience and gentleness. I know that can be my tendency when someone is not acting the way I think that they should. But Jesus demonstrates a higher way, and he loves and extends kindness without strings attached. Jesus’ kindness is not based on your behavior, it's based on his favor for you, the generous and charitable heart of God. And you and I are to reflect his generosity to others.So here are a few ideas to get you started exercising your kindness muscles. Write words of encouragement to a co-worker or friend. When someone has an opposing opinion, listen respectfully. Buy a co-worker lunch and if you’re working remotely, have their favorite meal delivered. Send a thank you note to someone who has made an impact on your life. Hold your tongue when someone frustrates you and instead of reacting harshly, be patient and loving. Let that car merge in front of you (I know. This one will take extra kindness). Consider intentionally practicing kindness each day for the next 30 days. Kindness is no small thing. When practiced, it yields fruit both in your life and the lives of those around you.
(presented by Lisa Bishop)When you are treated unkindly, how do you respond? Think about it, when was the last time you were mistreated, or hurtful words were flung at you? A co-worker throws you under the bus, a family member shuns you because of your faith, or a friend cancels you because of your political views. Do you maintain your composure or lash back with your words or actions? It can be tempting to fight fire with fire. In a world where people seem to be more stressed out and on edge than ever before it doesn’t take much to set people off and in turn react in retaliation with even the slightest of offense. In the gospel of Luke, we see Jesus being called out and condemned by the Pharisees and teachers of the religious law. They were “filled with fury” because Jesus was healing on the Sabbath and they “discussed with one another what they might do to Jesus” (Luke 6:11). They were plotting his demise and devising ways to destroy him. It’s a pretty intense situation. Jesus knows the thoughts and intentions of those who were against him and yet this is what he says to his followers.Luke 6:27-28 “Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, 28 bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.” Luke 6:31-36 Do to others as you would have them do to you. “If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that…… But love your enemies, do good to them….. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the most high because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful. Now you and I most likely do not have enemies that are trying to take us down like Jesus experienced. But we are called to follow his example and take on his demeanor when we are faced with mistreatment. God shows love towards his enemies and is kind to those who are evil. That is a tall order and only possible through the indwelling power of the Holy Spirit at work in you. Treating others the way we would want to be treated is a divine characteristic. The next time you are wronged, don’t retaliate. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you respond with kindness and mercy.
(presented by Lisa Bishop)Have you ever had an unkind word spoken to you? What feeling did it evoke? Harsh words uttered toward me have left me with a feeling of shame, embarrassment, fear, and self-doubt. How about you? On the flipside, when have you spoken an unkind word or made an unkind gesture? To a friend, a spouse, a co-worker; or even a stranger? I say when because the reality is we all have less than shining moments when impatience, anger, frustration, or arrogance has gotten the best of us and lured us into behaviors unbecoming of a follower of Jesus. We know we are called to be kind, and yet insensitive, thoughtless, and inconsiderate words and actions can seep out of us. In a fast-paced world where stress and division can be prevalent, how do we cultivate kindness in our lives?Ephesians 4:30-32 beautifully captures the essence of kindness: “And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” These verses remind us of our calling as followers of Jesus and how we are to live set apart, pointing people to Jesus by pursuing kindness, compassion, and forgiveness. Kindness is a fruit of the Holy Spirit and can be a simple yet profound act of treating others with empathy and respect. And we can grieve the Holy Spirit when we act in unkind ways. The Greek word translated as “grieve” means “to cause to feel sorrow, pain, unhappiness, or distress.” The Holy Spirit is the third person of the Trinity. He is a person, not an it. He is God. He has a personality and the ability to feel emotions and we grieve the Holy Spirit when we hold grudges or withhold forgiveness. When we speak careless words to one another, instead of uplifting and encouraging words. On my flight home from Utah a few days ago I caught a glimpse of a woman’s t-shirt. It said, “I’m doing the best I can.” Now I don’t know her story, but those words reminded me that we never know what people are dealing with. Behind smiles at the office and selfies on social media there is often a lot of pain and heartache. Let’s remember to be tenderhearted, kind, and loving toward others.
(presented by Lisa Bishop)How do you respond to correction? Think about a time when someone called you out for ungodly behavior. An impatient or reactive response, fudging something at work, wavering in your faithfulness in your marriage, or telling a white lie. Whether in the workplace, at home, or in your small group, what was your reaction when your behavior was confronted? We all experience times when we speak, act, and live in ways that are not in alignment with how we are called to be as a follower of Jesus. Ways that are harmful to ourselves, to our relationships, and to our witness. The key is, are you open to correction, or do you respond with defensiveness, denial, or deflection when someone points out a shortcoming?In Psalm 141:5, King David prays, “Let a righteous man strike me—that is a kindness; let him rebuke me—that is oil on my head. My head will not refuse it.” David, a king, asked for correction and called it kindness. And when he says it is oil on his head he is saying that being confronted with the truth and having his flaws exposed is soothing medicine! What an attitude of humility. How often do we see people protecting themselves from correction, yet King David intentionally invites trustworthy men to shine a light on anything in his life that was not pleasing to God. Do you invite that type of correction in your life? To grow in your role as a co-worker, leader, friend, parent, or spouse; to progress and mature spiritually, you need a few faithful friends who are willing to point out when your life does not reflect who you are in Jesus. When your words or actions do not align with those of a spirit-filled follower of Christ, rebukes from the righteous, offered in love, are one of the keys to holiness and living a faithful and fruitful life. Now this is not license for reckless criticism. As a mentor of mine once said, “We call out with the intention of calling someone up.” The attitude of heart is one of deep desire for a person to live from their true identity in Jesus. Who are the two to three trustworthy, spiritually mature (not perfect), men and women in your life you can invite to shine a light and help you continue to grow into the image you bear in Christ? Ask the Holy Spirit to help you be open, eager, and grateful to accept, acknowledge, and learn from their correction.
(presented by Lisa Bishop)How are you investing your time?There are so many things that clamor for your time and attention these days and the question to ask yourself is this, “Is what I am investing my time in producing a profitable return?”If you were to take an assessment of the past week or even the past 24-48 hours, how have you spent those precious moments?I was on a girls’ getaway weekend not too long ago and we were confessing the time we spent on social media. An intended 20 minutes can easily turn into a mindless two hours, with very little return. And dare I say rather than making fruitful deposits, much of our media intake actually makes significant withdrawals; mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. The reality is every minute of every day that passes is irretrievably gone. And whether you are wasting your time on Instagram reels or worrying about the future, it’s time you cannot get back. That’s why time is the most valuable commodity of all, even more precious than money. Is where you are investing your time yielding a high return?God promises a great return when you study his ways and his thoughts and invest time in his Word.In Isaiah 55:8-11 we read,“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts. As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater, so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.”It is impossible to spend time reading the Bible and not benefit. God’s Word is living and active (Hebrews 4:12) and will nourish you, grow you, make your life flourish, and be fruitful.So, wherever you are in life and whatever challenges you may be facing, God promises that the time you invest in immersing yourself in his Word is worth it.
The more I thought about unexpected acts of kindness, the more encouraged I was to realize that we as Christ-followers have the great privilege of living out the hope we have in Jesus, in a world that often seems hopelessly angry and hateful and unkind. While we face the reality of what’s happening, it’s important that we not just bemoan it and continue to focus on all that is wrong. Instead, because of Jesus, we have hope—and we can share that hope with the people in our worlds.It is reported that the great evangelist of the 20th Century, D. L. Moody said, “The world has yet to see what God can do through a man who is totally yielded to him.” And I believe your world and mine has yet to see what God can do through believers, individuals, like you and me, who are willing to be God’s light in this dark world. And it begins by making it our goal to be kind and gracious in every aspect, every relationship that God brings out way.We know that part of the fruit of the Spirit, given in Galatians 5, is kindness. And in Colossians 3:12 we read, Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Kindness should be our trademark as ambassadors for Christ. That’s where it must begin. We can be kind—we will want to be kind—when we allow God’s Spirit to clothe us with this fruit; to make us more like Jesus.So, part one is prayer—and a daily commitment to be God’s representative in our worlds. What does your world include? Of course, it begins at home, and you know, sometimes that’s the most difficult place to wear kindness, have you noticed? Yes, we love our families, those closest to us, but they can be the first ones to step on our toes and push our buttons. And no doubt, it works the other way around as well—we step on their toes.So, let’s begin at home by being careful to speak words of kindness to our mates, our children, our parents—those we love most. Sometimes that just means a change in the tone of your voice. Proverbs 16:21 says: The wise in heart are called discerning, and gracious words promote instruction. Another version puts it this way: “sweetness of speech increases persuasiveness.” I have been noticing lately how words of kindness and affirmation, with encouraging tones in the voice, bring a very different response. It just works! God’s word is totally relevant to the relationships in your home. So, give it a real try—speak kind and gracious and encouraging words to those people in your house and/or your family.Then, look for opportunities to show kindness where there is often strife or lack of harmony and unity—perhaps where you work. Maybe like becoming more intentional about showing kindness, doing little things, things easy to do, like smiling more. Yes, I’m serious. Smiling makes a difference, and it takes virtually no effort or time and it cost nothing. Proverbs says that a happy heart makes the face cheerful, so keep your heart cheerful and let your face reflect it (Proverbs 15:13).Another small thing that can make a difference is simply complimenting someone when you can do so sincerely. I always say if you think something nice about someone, then say it if you can. “I like your outfit.” “You did a great job.” “You were a great help; thank you.” The simplest things can make a difference. It’s amazing how powerful words can be—they have the power of life and death. And Proverbs 16 reminds us that Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones. A few gracious words in a tense or trying situation can truly be a healing element that changes the tone.You may be thinking that these things don’t sound like anything much, nothing that could really change anything or anyone. But I challenge you to give it a serious try—focus on the small things you can do throughout your day to make your workplace kinder. It can be contagious; pray about it and give it a try.And you know,
I wonder if you’ve ever contemplated just how totally sufficient Jesus is because he is your way, your truth and your life? I’ve been pointing out some of the names of Jesus that we find in Scripture and encouraging you to claim those names for your own needs. I’ve talked about how Jesus is your Advocate, Jesus is God with you, Jesus is your Wonderful Counselor and your Prince of Peace—just some of the many titles and authority given to Jesus.But when Jesus said, “I am the way, the truth and the life” (John 14:6), what he was saying is that everything you will ever need is found in him. He is your way, your path to God and eternal life. Jesus was again telling his disciples to “Follow me.” Peter later wrote: “Salvation is found in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given to men by which we must be saved” (Acts 4:12).He declared that he is the Truth—therefore, he is trustworthy. He can never lie to you or deceive you, and you can totally trust everything he has said and every direction he has given you. He is the Truth that can set you free from your sin, free from fear, free from bondage.And Jesus is your life. Jesus was telling his disciples about his impending death, and then he claimed to be the source of all life. He said he would lay down his life for the sheep, and then that he would rise from the dead to life again. He gave the promise that “because I live, you also will live.”So, wherever you are today—in whatever predicament you find yourself, your need is met in Jesus. Claim his names: He is the way, the truth and the life. Run to Jesus; call on Jesus; trust Jesus. Everything is always all about Jesus. So, claim his name, his authority, as your own. That is your privilege if you are truly born from above.
Peace is a commodity in short supply these days—wouldn’t you agree? While we hear a lot of talk about peace, we recognize that there is precious little of it in our world and in our lives. How about you? Are you a little short on peace right now? Have you been spending too much time in worry mode? Has fear seized your mind and heart, keeping you awake at night?I’m talking about the names of Jesus—the titles and authority he has been given by the Father. Names that show his power and his authority. And one of those names is Prince of Peace, which we read in Isaiah 9. A prince is someone who is a leader and has influence and authority. Therefore, the Prince of Peace can bestow peace on a person or situation.If you have become a believer in Jesus Christ, then you have access to the Prince of Peace. That means that there is no need for you to be held captive by worry or fear, because you can claim the name of Jesus—the Prince of Peace—and he will give you peace. Ephesians 2:14 says that Jesus himself is our peace.Jesus said that the peace he gives us is not just temporary peace like you might find in the world. Jesus said it’s peace that only he can give, and Paul wrote to the church in Philippi that “the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:7).So, why are you living in worry and fear? Do you see how useless and unnecessary it is for you as a child of God because you can claim the name of Jesus, your Prince of Peace. And you do that by faith. You believe that Jesus is your peace, and you claim that peace as your own. You don’t have to feel it; you just have to believe that Jesus is the Prince of Peace, and he has peace for you.I would suggest that when you find yourself engulfed by worry or fear, you simply start repeating what the Bible says is true, that Jesus, the Prince of Peace, is your peace. Resist the enemy who wants to keep you mired in doubt and worry. Run him off—out of your mind—by repeating the truth that Jesus is your peace, and then repeat that as often as you need to throughout the day. This is how you claim the name of Jesus.
I’m talking about the names—or titles—of Jesus that we can claim for whatever need we’re facing. For example, did you know that Jesus is your heavenly Advocate? First John 2:1 says: “My dear children, I write this to you so that you will not sin. But if anybody does sin, we have an advocate with the Father—Jesus Christ, the Righteous One.” An advocate is someone who supports you, who pleads on your behalf. What an incredible truth that as believers in Jesus Christ, we can claim this name of Jesus, that he is our Advocate with the Father.Scripture tells us that Jesus is seated at the right hand of God’s throne and he is there to intercede for you, to plead on your behalf. That means that you have the privilege of going right to God’s throne in prayer, and Jesus is there to plead your case.The Bible tells us that Satan is accusing us night and day before the Father (Revelation 12:10). Do you get the picture here? Satan is accusing you, but Jesus is at the right hand of God advocating for you. It’s like a scene from a courtroom, but the verdict is already determined. Satan can accuse all he wants, but he can’t win, because we have an Advocate, Jesus Christ.Could it be that you are now facing some failure on your part—something you did or said or failed to do that you know was wrong, was sinful? You know that you have disobeyed God in some way and your conscience is really bothering you.But what do you do? You go to your Advocate, to Jesus in prayer and you claim his name—his authority—as your Advocate to plead your case to the Father for forgiveness. Just believe what the Bible says—you have an advocate with the Father when you sin, and Jesus, your Advocate, has all authority given to him in heaven and in earth. So, do you think he will win your case for you? You can be totally confident that if you confess your sin, your Heavenly Father will forgive you because you come to him through Jesus, your Advocate.So, claim the name today of Jesus, your Advocate, and know the freedom that comes through forgiveness and cleansing.
What are you facing today that has you puzzled? Our lives are full of decision points, forks in the road where the choice we make will have some significant impact in our lives. How do you make good decisions? How can you be sure that you’re choosing the right path?Well, for those of us who have placed our trust in Jesus as our Savior, we have access to him and the power of his name. And one of the most wonderful names given to Jesus is found in Isaiah 9:6, which says “he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.” In that one verse we have four of the incredible names given to our Lord, and at the top of the list is Wonderful Counselor.What is the role of a counselor? It is to give guidance and trustworthy advice, right? So, as you’re facing some important decisions today, have you gone for counsel to Jesus, or are you just trying to figure it out on your own? His name is Wonderful Counselor—the best Counselor. Have you claimed the name of Jesus for the guidance that you need?I well remember some years ago when I was facing a dilemma in my life, one that looked potentially dire and where the wrong decision could be catastrophic. I knew I needed good advice, so what did I do? I called my best friend, who just wasn’t available to me at that moment. I kept trying to reach her but to no avail, and I actually became irritated at her for not being there when I needed her. And as I paced the floor in frustration, trying to reach my friend, so clearly the Lord reminded me that Jesus is my Wonderful Counselor. He is the one I needed to turn to first and fast, because his guidance is perfect.So, I stopped and claimed the name of Jesus—Wonderful Counselor—and took the whole situation to him in prayer. He calmed my spirit and assured me that he would guide my steps through this situation and I could trust him. After all, he’s not like any other counselor—those who can be mistaken; instead he is my wonderful, perfect Counselor.I want to encourage you today, as you’re facing some decision point, some difficult situation, to first seek counsel from Jesus. Claim his name of Wonderful Counselor and call on him for the guidance you need. He’s always available, as a Christian you have instant access to his presence—no waiting around—and he is indeed a Wonderful Counselor in whom you can totally trust. Claim that name for yourself today.
The Bible makes it clear that the name of Jesus is to be honored and respected above all other names. In Philippians 2:9 we read:Therefore, God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.The President of the United States is called President, Leader of the Free World, Commander in Chief of the Armed Forces, Head of a Political Party—and other titles that are given to him because he was elected President. Those titles represent his authority in various areas. Similarly, but in a much more important way, Jesus has been given names by God the Father that represent his authority, and as Christ-followers, we have access to the power of his name.So, this week I want to focus on five of the many names in the Bible that describe Jesus and I want to encourage you as a Christ-follower to claim his name for whatever need you are facing—to “claim the name.”In Isaiah 7:14 we read that the Messiah will be called Immanuel, which means “God with us.” This is a name of Jesus you can claim.This means that in the midst of whatever you’re facing, you stop and claim the truth that Jesus is “God with you.” You are not alone. He will never leave you or forsake you. It means that in the middle of your pity party, when you are feeling sorry for yourself because you’re facing something all alone and you feel as though nobody cares, you can claim the name of Immanuel and know that God is with you.For those times when you feel forsaken or abandoned, when all your friends seem to have vanished, when the person closest to you doesn’t seem to understand what you’re going through, learn to tap into the power in the name of Jesus Immanuel—God with you. It’s true, but you must claim it for yourself—claim the name of Jesus Immanuel today and be encouraged because God is with you.
You know, when I get to heaven one of the first people I want to talk with is the Apostle Paul, because I want to ask him if he was serious about some of those verses he wrote. In particular, the one which says, "Be anxious for nothing" (Philippians 4:6), and this one we're looking at today, "Be kind to everyone.” That verse is found in 2 Timothy 2:24, which says, And the Lord's servant must not quarrel; instead, he must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful.As they would say in the old west, that's a "mighty tall order," don't you agree? If we're kind to everyone, that would include strangers, people who irritate us, people who don't do what they're supposed to do, people who are slow, people who don't appreciate any kindness we show them and never return it, people who don't deserve our kindness.You know, it's no great thing to be kind to people who you like, who are kind in return. Even the hardest heart can usually do that. Jesus said in his Sermon on the Mount If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? (Matthew 5:46). But be kind to EVERYONE? Is that possible?I remember an occasion where a fellow believer was most unkind to a certain person. The reason was simply because she didn't like certain types of people because of prejudices from childhood and from some unpleasant experiences of her own. So, when this person walked in the door, she truly was unkind to her. However, moments later when another person came in, more to her liking, she was very gracious and kind to her.It bothered me a great deal to see this happening within the Body of Christ; and yet you and I know it happens very frequently. We're kind to those who suit us, but often unkind to those who, for whatever reason, we don't feel inclined to be kind to.It wasn't many days after this that I found myself doing the same kind of thing. I was checking into a hotel and the clerk was not efficient. She was taking far too long and was very nonchalant about everything and it irritated me. After all, I thought, I'm the customer here. She's inconveniencing me. Why can't she just do her job and get me checked in without all this unnecessary delay?And as I stood there, though I did not say anything inappropriate, the look on my face, the tone of my voice, and my whole body language sent the message loud and clear, and it was not a kind message. I could sense that she was aware of my unkind attitude.As I walked away, the Holy Spirit let me have it. Why couldn't I have been kind to her? All it required of me was a different look, a few nice words, and I could have shown her some kindness. But just because she didn't perform the way I thought she should and I was inconvenienced one slight bit, I was unkind.As is so often the case, I was irritated because my rights were violated, my schedule was very slightly interrupted, my plans were minimally delayed.Then I realized that perhaps the people I find it most difficult to be kind to are strangers, people I don't know and with whom I have very brief interactions. Sometimes it's simply because my mind is so preoccupied with other things, and I just don't take time to be kind. Sometimes it's because I don't like what they're doing. But whatever the causes, there are no legitimate excuses. The servant of the Lord must be kind to everyone.I was reading in Mark 6 where Jesus was trying to get away with his disciples to a solitary place to rest. As it was, they couldn't even find time to eat because so many people were coming and going. So, they got in the boat to escape the crowds, but that didn't work. The crowd followed them, and when the boat landed, they were there already, waiting for them. When Jesus saw them, we read that he "had compassion on them, because they were like sheep without a shepherd. So he began teaching them many things" (Mark 6:34).I thought, “Lord, you're amazing. You were exhausted,
What Kingdom Equity are you wasting? Kingdom Equity includes the good things—our gifts and abilities and skills and knowledge—as well as the hard things, the heartaches, the failures.What part of your past—or your present—have you put in the category of “Not good” or “Not fair” or “Shameful” and therefore tried to hide it from others as well as yourself? Or you’ve let it sit there so long that bitter roots are growing in your heart and those bitter roots are causing trouble and defiling you and others. Or you’ve allowed yourself to live in the lie that God can’t really use you like he uses other people because of your past.The thing about this kind of Kingdom Equity—the kind that is filled with sorrow and heartaches and failure—is that it’s very difficult to see how God can use it when we’re in the middle of it. It’s usually only in hindsight that we can say, as Joseph did, “God meant it to me for good.” So that means that when we’re in the middle, we have to walk by faith and not by sight. We have to decide if we’re really going to trust God or not—against our feelings and our emotions.Some time ago I was suddenly faced with a situation that was potentially very harmful. And that situation was not resolved for almost an entire year. More than any other time in my life, my trust in God was tested. I had doubts; I certainly had fears; I wanted to run away and forget it all. My faith was tested. I wish I had come through better than I did; there were days that I did not have the victory. But in the end, by God’s grace, I came through as gold refined in the fire. I now have much more sympathy and empathy with those who are in the midst of a struggle than I ever had before. It’s Kingdom Equity that God allowed in my life, to be used for his glory.When we allow God to use all his Kingdom Equity in us, it brings meaning to every aspect of our lives. Nothing is wasted, and we find that the pains and hurts of our lives can be used for good, as well as all that experience you’ve gained in your working world, the talents you developed when you were young, the skills you’ve added through your life. It’s all Kingdom Equity, and God is looking for a return on his investment in you.
What is it in your life that is your greatest sorrow or regret? Did you know that even those things God has allowed in your life, and they can be used for good? I’m talking about Kingdom Equity--what God invests in us and how he wants a return on his investments.Please understand I am not saying that God is the author of all these difficult things; God never condones sin or evil and it is never from God. But our God is so great that he never wastes anything in our lives, even our sorrows or our sins or abuse we’ve suffered, or our failures.We are so prone to say, “God is good” when something favorable has happened to us. A friend just got a job after a few months of unemployment. We say, “God is good.” A baby is born without any problems; we say, “God is good.” A journey is traveled without any accidents; we say, “God is good.” We got money back from our income tax, and we declare, “God is good.” We got a report back from the doctor and the lump is benign, and we shout, “God is good.” Are those signs of God’s goodness? Absolutely. But what about the hard times and the disappointments and the bad news? Are we just as quick to affirm that God is good—all the time? When Job’s wife suggested that he curse God and die, he said, “You are talking like a foolish woman. Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?” (Job 2:10)Whatever has happened to you, is happening to you, or will happen to you can become instruments that God can use in your life. I’ve often told how I wandered for ten years away from God and his plan for my life. That wasn’t what God wanted for me; it was my own sinful choices. But I can tell you that I’m better able to help and encourage others because I know what it’s like to live with the consequences of my sinful choices. That means I have understanding and empathy for others that I probably would not have had without those ten years of disobedience.God doesn’t waste anything in our lives. He uses everything that has happened to us as a means to display his glory. All of that junk, the stuff you would have eliminated from your life story if you had written it—all of it can become instruments of God’s grace to others.
We don’t usually think of the difficult things in our lives as investments, do we? Can it be true that the hard things you’ve gone through, the difficulties you’ve encountered, the heartaches you’ve known—even your sins and failures—can be seen as God’s investment in you? How can that be Kingdom Equity?Well, the truth is that it is often these hard things that drive us to know God, that keep us humble, that show us our total inadequacy and force us to depend on God. God is never the author of evil, but he has this marvelous way of turning what someone meant to us for harm into something that he uses for good, as he did with Joseph. And they include things such as: Your childhood experience. If you were deprived of what you needed as a child—love or protection or security or safety—any of those basics and instead you endured some suffering—that is Kingdom Equity. Your health issues. Maybe you’ve faced some real health fears—that is Kingdom Equity. Your financial hardships. You’ve lost a job, and you’ve faced month-ends without enough money to pay your bills—that is Kingdom Equity. Broken relationships. That marriage that fell apart, or that friend or family member who is estranged or distant from you—again, Kingdom Equity. Disappointments in people. That adult child who has left the church and the truths you taught him or her about God. That friend who betrayed you. That boss who fired you—more Kingdom Equity. Significant losses. That parent who died—or mate or child or close friend—Kingdom Equity. Sins from your past. Yes, even those things of which you are ashamed, those times when you chose to live in sin and stray far from God—Kingdom Equity.All of these are Kingdom Equity that God wants to use for good in your life. That means that none of these things are meaningless. God doesn’t waste anything—not even sorrows and heartaches.
What are you doing with your Kingdom Equity? Kingdom Equity is what God has invested in you to use for his glory. It comes in two forms, the first of which is:Kingdom Equity of Gifts and AbilitiesGod invests equity in us through our gifts, our talents, our skills, the things we’ve learned, our education, our years of simply living life! For example, a great deal of my experience in the business world was to make presentations. That experience was planned by God to teach me how to make a presentation and think on my feet, which was part of the good works he planned in advance for me to do.I have a friend who has begun a ministry to widows in Africa, teaching them how to make things that they could sell to support their families. They have to use treadle sewing machines that work without electricity and guess how she learned to sew as a young girl. On a Singer treadle machine. So, she can teach them how to sew on a treadle machine. That’s Kingdom Equity that God is now using.What about the skills you’ve acquired through your life. How are you using that Kingdom Equity for God? He didn’t invest that experience, that talent, that gift in you just for your enjoyment. He expects a return on his investment.Paul wrote to Timothy: “For this reason I remind you to fan into a flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands” (2 Timothy 1:6). Fan into a flame the gifts God has invested in you. Improve them, enlarge them, expand them. Get better at doing what you do.I look back on the 39 years I’ve had this radio ministry and I see how God has given me abilities and skills that I never dreamed were in me. That’s because he promises that if we use what he has invested in us, he will invest more in us. The parable of the talents teaches us this principle.God has invested in all his children and he’s looking for a return on his investment. Are you using what he has invested in you to bring glory to him?
Do you know what Kingdom Equity is? A friend of mine introduced me to this term not long ago, and it has really caught my attention. I’m sure you know what equity is. For example, if you bought a house, you invested money in that house, and the amount you invested is your equity in it. And as we make investments, we are doing so with the hope that our investment will grow in value, and we will receive a profit from our investment.Well, God has invested Kingdom Equity in all his children because our purpose here on this earth is to bring glory to God by doing the good things he prepared in advance for us to do:Ephesians 2:10: For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.If you are born from above, God has predetermined your list of good works he wants you to do, and he knows what resources and talents and gifts and experiences you will need to do those good works. So, from the beginning of your days he has been investing in you what you will need to do those good works.This Kingdom Equity comes in two different forms: The gifts and abilities and talents and opportunities and education and experiences you have been given that will be needed to do Kingdom work. The difficulties and hardships and troubles and failures you go through that teach you to trust and know God like nothing else can do.Whether you are aware of it or not, God has been making investments in you and he expects a return on his investment. He expects you to multiply your resources, your gifts, and to use them for his glory. So, the question for today is: Have you overlooked those investments God has made in you? Or have you wasted them on yourself instead of on the Kingdom? It is Kingdom Equity, and you will give an account to God as to your stewardship of the investments God has put in you.
I want to read this very familiar passage, to refresh our memories of the importance of love as set forth in these 13 verses of 1 Corinthians 13.If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have no love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is loveThis definition and description of love is quite the opposite of what we think of as love today. But this is God’s kind of love, and it is the kind of love we should have for God and for others.Some dear friends once asked me, "How can we pray for you?", and my ready reply was, "Just pray that I'll love Jesus more and more and have a heart to love others.” If those things are in place in my life, everything else follows. If not, nothing I do has any importance or meaning. Paul said I could speak with the voice of an angel, but it wouldn't mean anything without a loving heart.Paul also said that love is the fulfilling of the law. This was a radical statement in his day because all of his fellow Jews were focused on fulfilling the Ten Commandments and the 110 other commandments which they had manufactured out of them. Can you imagine how difficult that must have been, just to remember all of them? And now Paul brings this revolutionary principle: "If you do one thing, you will do these 110 things without even thinking about them. If you love, you will unconsciously fulfill the whole law."If we focus on ONE thing—being filled with love for Jesus and love for others—all other spiritual virtues automatically follow. Yet so often we reverse the process. I think of a woman who is in many ways very godly. She prays all the time; she studies her Bible constantly; she is at every church service; she keeps herself separate from harmful activities of any type; her life is exemplary in many ways. Yet, when she is with people, almost every time she causes others to be uncomfortable and hurts feelings because of her words, which sound unloving and self-righteous.Oh, we need to pray and read our Bibles and keep our lives separate from worldly actions, but those things should follow love, not precede it. Without being focused on love, we may do a lot of things that look good, but they'll never impress God, because he says without love, it amounts to nothing in his sight.Paul begins that 13th chapter of 1 Corinthians by contrasting love with several things. First, with eloquence. I would truly love to be a great speaker. I'd love to be one of those people who can mesmerize an audience with their incredible ability to communicate. But Paul reminds me that even if I could speak with the tongue of an angel, it would be a big zero without love.Then he contrasts love with the gifts of prophecy and the ability to understand great mysteries and knowledge.
Throughout the thirty-nine plus years I have been broadcasting, my deepest desire and prayer has been that I could somehow inspire Christians in the marketplace to see their jobs as their calling—as the place God has them to be a light in a dark world. I know that many of you have that attitude and I’ve heard so many of your stories of how God is using you to make a difference where you work.Over time, asking what difference you can make while you’re at work can become a habitual question—a way of life. It becomes automatic, so that instead of having a defeatist attitude, you look at every situation from the perspective of what you can do to make a difference.But it won’t just happen. We each have to be intentional about it on a daily basis, and we need to be motivated by love of God and love of people—the two things Jesus told us we need to do, love God and love people. This kind of attitude comes through prayer and the power of God’s Spirit residing in us. But the incredibly good news is, as disciples of Jesus Christ we have both the motivation and the power to make a difference.And it just so happens that when we work as unto the Lord, it also reduces our stress, brings us joy and fulfillment, and makes our daily lives meaningful and worthwhile. It’s a win-win way to live. You just can’t go wrong living the way God designed you to live.Colossians 3:23-24: Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.
Are you making a difference where you work? You and I should be making positive differences where we work, don’t you think? I’m talking about extra-mile efforts that truly help the organization function better in some way or another.Does your organization have any kind of volunteer program where employees can be a part of some good charitable project? Many companies are more attuned to that these days, but if yours isn’t, why couldn’t you suggest or start something? I find that people really want to help others, but they just don’t know how to get involved. Offer a suggestion, and they’ll usually want to help. For example, you could have a food drive for a homeless shelter or a food bank. Or you could suggest visiting a nursing home once a month just to cheer up the residents.The Boy Scouts have a motto that says, “Leave it better than you found it.” Just suppose all of us had that attitude toward our everyday work. From cleaning up messes and keeping the place looking nice, to improving the quality of your work effort and coming up with ways to do a better job, if we each intentionally tried to leave our workplace each day better than we found it, how much nicer would our jobs be? How much easier would it be to come to work each day?I know that not everyone will share your enthusiasm for making a difference where you work, and furthermore, not everyone will appreciate your efforts. But that should not matter especially if you are a disciple of Jesus Christ. You have the privilege and the responsibility of doing everything you do as under the Lord.Ephesians 6:7-8: Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not people, because you know that the Lord will reward each one for whatever good they do, whether they are slave or free.Our calling as Christ-followers is to make a difference in every situation—because we are working for Jesus. I want to do that and I’m sure you do too.
What could you do to help your organization save money? Now, if you’re not personally in charge of the finances of your organization, you may not think about ways to save money. But believe me, everyone needs to do a better job of cutting unnecessary expenses.From something as small as turning off lights when you don’t need them, to conserving paper, to reducing phone bills or travel expenses, it makes a difference when everyone watches the bottom line. All too often employees have an attitude of taking advantage of the company and getting some financial benefit for themselves. Just imagine how unique it would be to have an employee who simply does what she or he can do to eliminate unnecessary expenses, finds less expensive ways to do things, or more economical sources. It would make a difference.Are there some ways you could help your fellow coworkers who may be dealing with some negative situations? Some extra-mile effort might make a big difference—something like pitching in to help them meet a deadline or showing them some new skills or easier ways to do things. I know that I frequently need help with my computer. I use it constantly yet I have very poor understanding of how it works! So, when someone takes the time to dig me out of one of my technical problems, it is much appreciated!So, eliminating negatives is a great way to make a difference where you work. Then adding something positive is equally important. Don’t underestimate the impact that small things make—things like remembering birthdays or anniversaries, finding ways to have small celebrations. Recently someone sent out a reminder that our church receptionist was celebrating twenty-five years of service to the church. What fun it was to celebrate her and give her a little gift to say how much we appreciate her.Making a difference at work should be a hallmark of a Christian, but we have to be intentional about it. So I hope you’ll give it some thought.
I’m challenging you—and myself—to begin each workday asking what you can do to make a positive difference where you work.There are any number of ways you can do this: in the way you work, in the quality of your work effort, and of course, in your interactions with the people you work with and for. Let’s think of some practical ways you could make a difference, no matter where you work. You can make a difference by adding something positive or eliminating something negative.The first and most important way you make a difference is by your very demeanor. Do you show up at work in negative mode, complaining too often, criticizing too much? That’s a negative that can be eliminated. So, first, you can show up each day in positive mode, with a smile on your face, greeting people in a friendly way, and keeping your words out of negative territory.And that applies, even if you’re working from home. You still have to show up, right? And the mood you are in shows up in your emails or on Zoom or Microsoft Teams – or however you connect with co-workers. Attitudes generally surface and complaining and griping attitudes come through rather clearly.I think many times we are more negative than we realize. So, here’s a suggestion: Determine for just one day that you will not say anything negative all day long. Set that as your goal—to get through one entire day without being negative. Pray about it at the beginning of your day and ask God to help you remember not to say anything negative all day. If you do that, you may be surprised to see how many times you begin a negative comment, and you have to stop in the middle of your sentence.Then go the extra mile and determine what you can do to put something positive in your day at work. More smiles, encouraging emails, respectful responses, sincere compliments—there are so many ways to make a positive difference. You just have to remember to do it.
What difference are you making where you work? You may recall that in his inaugural speech, President Kennedy made this now famous statement: “Ask not what your country can do for you, but ask what you can do for your country.” So instead of asking: “What difference does my work make?” ask instead, “What difference can I make at work?”When you approach your everyday work with the attitude of what you can give instead of what can you get, it will make a significant difference in your effectiveness on the job. And it will make a difference in your effectiveness as a representative of Jesus Christ.Some time ago I was introduced to a website called wildaboutwork.com and found some really good thoughts there. With the permission of the author, Curt, I’m using some of his ideas this week.As Christ-followers, we must continually remind ourselves that every part of our lives is sacred. There are no secular/sacred categories for us. As I’ve often said, for a disciple of Jesus Christ, working in what we would classify as a secular organization should be as sacred as working in a church or becoming a missionary. Our calling should be as clear as any of those who we classify as being in “full time Christian service.” It’s unfortunate that this terminology is used because it simply is not biblical. Every believer is in full time Christian service—or should be.Therefore, we definitely should have a different attitude toward our work and our coworkers and our employers. And we should approach our work each day with this attitude of “what difference can I make today?”So, your first challenge is to make sure you go to work each day with the right attitude. I know that’s not always easy to do because you work in some difficult situations. But as a believer, you can do all things through Christ who gives you strength, and I suggest you start each day asking God for an attitude adjustment. I have no doubt that if you daily ask God to give you the right attitude toward your work and ask him to give you a desire to make a difference, he will do it.
Presented by Lisa BishopWe were never meant to do this life alone. We need to be supportive and receive the support of community.I was reminded of this the other day as I was walking along the lake in Chicago. It was beautiful outside. The sun was shining, there was a cool breeze and the rays of light were bouncing off the blue water. As I was taking in the scenery, I caught a glimpse of a mother duck and her ducklings. It was the cutest thing to see about 10 baby ducks bobbing up and down in the waves, furiously wiggling and flapping their little feet to keep up.At first, I noticed the ducklings were in an ununiformed cluster behind their mom, easily being tossed around by the ripples in the water. If the smallest waves came, they would easily drift away from the group. And then, I saw something fascinating. Within a few minutes the ducklings were making every effort to form a line.It reminded me of the proverbial picture of getting your ducks in a row. It took a lot of paddling, determination, and effort but low and behold, when the baby ducks finally formed a line, their journey seemed a bit smoother.It turns out that when a duckling swims on its own, it kicks up waves in its wake, using up energy that would otherwise send it surging ahead. That wave drag resists the duckling’s motion so it stays stagnant; and if they fall out of position, swimming gets even harder. But when they form a line instead of swimming alone, they experience 158 percent less wave drags which means the duckling gets a boost.Swimming in a collective and unified manner isn’t just beneficial for baby ducks, we all need the boost that “paddling together,” forming connection, brings.Because you were never meant to swim alone.You are created for companionship and connection. We know this, yet sometimes we can fall into the trap of isolation and forget that building and being in community is vital to thriving in life and faith. So, I want to talk about the discipline of community.It sounds kind of weird to think of community in those terms, but if you think about it, creating and participating in community, well, it takes hard work and it takes discipline.One way I have heard discipline defined is, “Training used to establish desired habits and expected to produce a specific character or pattern of behavior, especially training that produces moral or mental improvement.”When you practice discipline, you are acknowledging that something can be difficult to create, attain, and sustain. That it takes effort, intentionality, consistency, and commitment over the long haul. Building a healthy community is an investment; it takes time, it is not always easy, but in the end it’s worth it.I think these days we are more and more prone to the idea of self-sufficiency and we neglect the impact of community. We think that we can experience life alone, go through struggles alone, and even follow Jesus alone. But that is not how God designed you, it’s not how he designed me or anyone else for that matter. If you think about it, Jesus didn’t live alone. He had a close circle of three; Peter, James, and John. And we know that he also had the twelve disciples and others that were his faithful companions. They formed circles of intimacy with one another, and you and I need the same.No matter how you’re wired—whether you are an introvert, extrovert, find it easy to socialize and engage in conversation or you tend towards social anxiety—something in your soul longs for meaningful relationships with other humans. We long to know others and be known by them. We treasure friendships that allow us to truly “be ourselves.” All of us long for a deep, authentic community. It’s hard-wired in you because God created you in his image, he created you for community. And the basis of community is found in the Trinity.The Trinity shows us that God himself is community. Before God created Adam and Eve,
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)If you were to take a step back and notice some of the habits in your life, what would you see? The other day I got out of bed at my typical 6am wake-up time. For the past several years I have disciplined myself to get up early, and now I don’t even need an alarm clock. That has not always been the case! It required creating habits one day and action at a time. I’ve also made it my daily morning routine to drink a glass of water and read my Bible, and workout three or four times week for 30 minutes. Getting in some physical activity in the morning helps me tremendously not only physically but also mentally and emotionally.If I am honest sometimes the last thing I want to do is roll out of bed and pull up a HIIT video on YouTube. But in those moments, if I do what I feel like doing instead of staying the course, committed to my goals, it can be easy for me to fall off the workout wagon and lack the diligence of being disciplined.As you reflect on your life, what area might be suffering due to a lack of discipline? In other words, what habits are working for you…or not? Some habits in your life are productive and beneficial and some are downright destructive and can detour you from the person you want to be and the goals you want to achieve. For example, creating the habit of eating healthy and working out can prove to be beneficial. The habit of being reactive and easily offended or angered, not so much. Repeated actions, reactions, and choices become engrained and turn into habits whether intentional or not.When you consciously and deliberately exert discipline, you train yourself to establish desired habits that lead to desired outcomes in your life, work, and relationships. And as a follower of Jesus, you need to discipline yourself with the truth of God’s Word so that your character is molded and shaped to Jesus and your behaviors reflect his divine nature.For example, are you in the habit of extending forgiveness or do you hold onto resentment? Do you practice humility or are you prideful or boastful? Are you easily put off if someone has a differing viewpoint or opinion or do you listen and show respect for the other person? When a person does or says something that needs to be addressed, do you demonstrate courage and have direct conversations, or do you gossip about them behind their back?Ultimately as followers of Jesus, we should lead disciplined lives—set apart from the patterns of the world. Not only does your spiritual thriving count on it, but your witness does also. If you have behaviors that mimic the sinfulness of the world, your spiritual ability to reach others is lost. Instead, strive to be a signpost to Jesus and live a disciplined life. A life of holiness that shines in the darkness and stands in contrast to the behavior of the surrounding culture. As you live disciplined and set apart in your lifestyle, you will draw attention to Jesus.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)Are you living free?The other day I was sitting in my kitchen with some friends having a conversation about our teen-aged years and some of the stupid things we did. I didn’t become a follower of Jesus until I was in my 20’s so I had plenty of time to live my version of “freedom” and make choices that I would later look back on with regret. And not that you must be young to be foolish. There are plenty of unwise decisions we can make, and temptations we can fall into, even as adult followers of Jesus.We live in a world that says, “Follow your impulses.” “Do what feels good in the moment.” “Act on what is right for you.” And we call this freedom. The dictionary defines freedom as, “Being able or allowed to do, say, think, whatever you want to, without being controlled or limited.” But true freedom is not the liberty to do as you please. True freedom requires discipline.To say that there is freedom in discipline can almost sound like an oxymoron. But in his letter to the Church in Rome the Apostle Paul alludes to the impact of the lack of discipline that leads to false freedom and ultimately leads to sin.“As long as you did what you felt like doing, ignoring God, you didn’t have to bother with right thinking or right living, or right anything for that matter. But do you call that a free life? What did you get out of it? Nothing you’re proud of now. Where did it get you? A dead end” (Romans 6:20-21, MSG).The world says, “Do what you want, when you want,” and calls it freedom. Jesus looks at satisfying the flesh as sin and calls it bondage.In Galatians 5:1 Paul emphatically says, “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.” You are a slave to whatever you let master you and influence your actions, words, and behavior. When it comes to true liberation, true freedom, it will require you to omit things in your life that do not reflect your salvation. Or said in another way, discipline yourself to get rid of unprincipled choices that gratify the flesh and do not reflect the holiness of God.Where in your life is lack of discipline crippling your freedom in Christ? What thoughts or actions are ruling you rather than being guided by God and put under the authority of Jesus? It is for freedom that Christ has set you free! Confess to God and thank him that his Holy Spirit not only guides you but empowers you to live a life of true liberty through the discipline of freedom.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)What is your state of mind?The other day I came across a picture some friends had snapped while standing under a neon sign that read, “Sunshine state of mind.” Being in Florida, otherwise known as “The Sunshine State,” I thought the sign was a clever play on words. It also got me thinking. What state is your mind in?If you take intentional time to consider where your head space is these days, what would you say? In other words, what is your mental state? What thoughts has your mind been fixing on? These are important questions to ask yourself because the thoughts you dwell on, your mindset, what you set your mind on, matters. The thoughts you allow yourself to linger on will not only impact the quality of your life but the trajectory of it too. Because where your thoughts go your life will follow.The apostle Paul talks about the importance of paying attention to the state of your mind in 2 Corinthians 10:5: “We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.”Take captive every thought. Here Paul is calling out anything that comes against the gospel of Jesus Christ, the truth of God’s Word, and he makes it clear that your thoughts are one type of stronghold that can hold you hostage. In other words, any false thinking, every thought you have that is not in alignment with the truth of who God is, who you are, how you see others, are to be obliterated and made obedient to Jesus. And, as you realign your mind to come under the authority of Christ, you encourage others to do the same.Your mind is a battleground, and you must make sure that you don’t allow Satan’s deceptions to gain a foothold. Your thoughts can become a fortress holding you captive to false thinking. Jesus wants you to submit your thoughts to him so that he rules your thoughts rather than you being ruined by the enemy!So, what is your state of mind? Are you dwelling on thoughts of defeat, unworthiness, jealousy, anger, pity, superiority? What thoughts are holding you captive and running your life that need to be held captive and made obedient to Christ? This is a friendly reminder to expose every wrong thought by the light of Scripture and in every single place you encounter wrong thinking, fight against that with the truth of God’s Word. Discipline your mind.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)In the Bible, discipline refers to moral training, instruction, and correction; and the outcome is spiritual growth, character development, and Christian maturity. Discipline is not meant to be a killjoy. Quite the opposite. As Hebrews 12:11 says, “No discipline is enjoyable while it is happening—it’s painful! But afterward there will be a peaceful harvest of right living for those who are trained in this way.” While all of God’s Word is full of rich and practical training and instruction for our everyday lives the book of Proverbs is solely dedicated to this end. The opening verses of Proverbs say,Their purpose is to teach people wisdom and discipline, to help them understand the insights of the wise. Their purpose is to teach people to live disciplined and successful lives, to help them do what is right, just, and fair. These proverbs will give insight to the simple, knowledge and discernment to the young. Let the wise listen to these proverbs and become even wiser. Let those with understanding receive guidance by exploring the meaning in these proverbs and parables, the words of the wise and their riddles. Fear of the Lord is the foundation of true knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and discipline. (Proverbs 1:1-7, NLT).The bottom line in these opening verses is don’t be a fool, respect and revere the Lord, desire wisdom and discipline.The book of Proverbs is a reminder that you must be in the Word of God, meditating on biblical truths, so that you grow in wisdom and spiritual maturity. This devotional is a spiritual snack; but make sure you make time to feast on the Scriptures so that your character in Christ grows and you reap the full benefits of thriving as a beloved daughter or son of God. And when it comes to discipline and character development, in addition to spending time hanging out in the Word, also be mindful of who you hang out with. As Proverbs 1:10 warns, “My child, if sinners entice you, turn your back on them!” In other words, if someone's lifestyle and behaviors draw you away from Jesus, reevaluate your relationships. Studies have shown that you are the average of the five people you are with the most. Who you spend time with influences the person you eventually become. The kind of people you interact with has an impact on your thoughts, beliefs and behaviors. So be disciplined and invest time in the Word, and be vigilant with who you do life with. Choose your companions wisely.
Have you ever found yourself living in regret? Maybe you have made a poor decision or series of not so wise choices and now you are paying the price so to speak?The other day I was sitting in a coffee shop waiting to meet up with a friend when I noticed a pen sitting on the table in front of me. I could tell that it had something written on it so I picked it up, and scribed on the side were the words, “I choose the pain of discipline over the pain of regret.” I think it was a slogan for a weight loss program but as I read those words I thought, “Wow, what a great motto for life.”Whether you want to lose 30 pounds, improve your sleep habits, learn a new language or land a promotion, achieving your goals will require discipline. Choosing what you want most over what you want now. That requires something that we all find challenging at times, delayed gratification. “I really want that donut, but I want better physical health more.” “I want to scroll on social media before bedtime but getting eight hours of sleep is more important to me.” “I want to do just enough to get by at work but my greater desire is career advancement.” What you want over the long haul will require you to kick in some self-restraint in the here and now. It will call upon you to resist short-term temptation for the longer-term satisfaction of reaching your goals.First Corinthians 10:13 is a verse I memorized years ago that is my go to reminder in times when my self-control is tested.“The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you can endure” (1 Corinthians 10:13 NLT).Did you notice that? “Not “if” you are tempted but “when” you are tempted!” Being lured into less than helpful habits is a part of life, but you have the faithfulness of God to help you by the power of his Holy Spirit.A fruit of the Holy Spirit is self-control which means you have the ability to master your desires, passions, and appetite! I know it is easier said than done. And if we get a little honest, sometimes we don’t want to forgo a desire in the now because it feels good. But as a follower of Jesus, you are not to be ruled by your feelings and impulses. So, when you are lured into a behavior that you know will not be beneficial in the long run, remember, choose the pain of discipline now over the pain of regret later.
Let's look at some common areas where our work habits may need to be reinforced. Good work habits require discipline and commitment, but they produce good work, good reputations, happy managers, career advancement, and good testimonies. So, it's really important to stay on top of these things.Working with ExcellenceAs I was teaching Genesis in my Sunday Bible study some time ago, I was very impressed with Joseph. Well, I've always been impressed with Joseph; he is definitely my kind of man. But did you ever think about how Joseph climbed the ladder in Egypt and achieved such outstanding success? It was because he was a very hard-working, very honest, very dependable person.It reminded me again of the opportunity we have on our jobs to establish strong testimonies for our Lord Jesus Christ simply by our work habits. I'm certain Joseph also talked about his faith in his God, but his words would have been empty had he not established a flawless reputation for excellence and integrity.What's it like with you on your job? Have you let some of your good work habits slip? For example, the habit of being dependably on time every day. You may feel like it doesn’t make any difference whether you’re on time or not. Maybe most people aren’t, so you use that as an excuse. And that applies whether you work on site or not. If you are working from home and if there is an established start time, it’s important to honor that start time and be ready to go on time.It's easy to let yourself off the hook when you aren't doing the right thing—finding someone or something to blame it on. But it’s really important to remind yourself that your work habits are sending messages about you every day on your job. And any of us can have a strong testimony for Jesus through our good work habits. There are no good excuses for being careless or sloppy or lazy or uncaring.Remember this verse from Colossians:Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, . . . since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving (Colossians 3:23-24).That "whatever" includes even boring work. It includes work done for a difficult manager. It includes work done in difficult situations. But when we work with all our hearts for the Lord, we will receive a reward. It won't go unnoticed.Being DependableDependability is one of the most important assets you can have on your job—or anywhere else. And everybody can be dependable! Are you careless about those little things? Do you make sure you do what you promise, and keep others informed when something goes wrong?Have you ever scheduled someone to come do some work at your home, and they were either a no-show or arrived very late? No doubt they had some kind of an excuse for their lack of dependability, but how did that make you feel?Now, obviously there are times when it becomes impossible for us to keep a commitment we’ve made. Something beyond our control has happened. But a dependable person will make sure to communicate as quickly as possible when that does happen. A phone call, a text, an email—it’s not usually difficult to let someone know that we’re going to miss a commitment. People are usually willing to give us a break if we simply keep them informed.Even though you may be a very good worker, lack of attention to these kinds of details can cause you to have a reputation for being undependable. I've seen that happen to many people; they do good work, but they forget things too easily, don't keep track of commitments, are poorly organized and structured so that things fall between the cracks too often. It's not an attitude problem, but a problem with their work habits.I don’t want to step on any toes, so to speak, but I just want to strongly reinforce the importance of good work habits, especially for those of us who are believers. I would hope that your co-workers know about your faith in Jesus Christ; the...
The last body part to present is probably the most important. You pray: "Here's my heart, Lord. Put in my heart your love and compassion for all the people I will see today.” Do you find it difficult to like some of the people you deal with each day? All of us do, don't we? But with our hearts given to God as living sacrifices, then he is free to give us his love for people, and we'll start to discover that we care about people we never cared about before.Then close by saying, "Lord, I present my body to you as a sacrifice that will live for you today, not for me. I do this by faith and trust you for the reality.” It's important that you understand we do this by faith. There may be absolutely no feelings associated with it. But God will honor that obedience on your part and you'll be amazed to see the changes that start to happen in your life.I believe you will be much more aware when your feet are trying to take you somewhere you shouldn't go; when you’re doing something with your hands that is not Christ-honoring; when your eyes and ears are focused on things that are harmful; when your tongue is saying words it should not say, when your mind is dwelling on the wrong things; when your heart is not loving and kind toward others.I would encourage you to take the Word of God literally, and put every part of your body before the Lord as a sacrifice. If you'll sincerely do that on a regular basis, you're going to discover that you'll be learning what it means to present your body as a living sacrifice. And you'll discover how exciting and rewarding it is to see that God can and does use you in ways you never imagined.
Romans 12 tells us to present our bodies as a living sacrifice to God, for this is a reasonable service.We do this by remembering at the beginning of each day to present our bodies as a living sacrifice. For example, you can pray: "Lord, here are my eyes; I want to see as you see. Here are my ears; may I listen to what you would listen to.” If your eyes and ears are committed to God each day as living sacrifices, you’re going to be much more careful about what you look at and hear, don't you think?There are going to be television programs and movies you'll never watch because they are not pure and clean. There are going to be YouTube videos and some podcasts you’ll never watch or listen to because they contain immoral and unedifying material. Also, you’ll be able to see this world and other people through the eyes of Jesus, and that perspective will make incredible changes in your everyday actions and reactions.Here's another part of your body to give over to God: "Lord, I give you my tongue today. I ask you to control all the words formed by my tongue, that they be words of help and healing.” My, how powerful our words are. The Bible tells us they have the power of life or death. I want to choose my words carefully so that they are words of life and they refresh others. A tongue that is presented to God each day as a living sacrifice will be an instrument of peace, it will be non-judgmental, it will speak words of encouragement.You can also pray: "Lord, my brain is yours; I want to think your thoughts.” It is very important that you present your mind to God, asking him to control your thoughts and reasoning processes.I strongly encourage you to consider doing this regularly—presenting parts of your body individually to God each day, being reminded of what it means to be a living sacrifice. It is one of the best ways to prepare yourself for the day ahead, because it reminds you that you are not your own, you are bought with a price. And therefore, your body—every part of it—should be a living sacrifice all day long every day.
How do I apply the passage in Romans 12:1-2, where we are admonished to give our bodies as living sacrifices? How do we do that? Well, here's what I often do.At the beginning of my day. I literally go through the parts of my body and relinquish each of them to God's service for the day, like this:"Lord, here are my feet. They are yours today. May I walk as Jesus would walk, go where you want me to go.” If my feet are given to God as a living sacrifice, for sure there will be places that I won't go, because Jesus wouldn't go there. Such places as social scenes that would cause me to compromise.But that's probably the easy part. Feet that are living sacrifices will take me places I might not think of going otherwise. I'll go to people who need me, I'll be in places of worship, I'll use my feet to take me where Jesus would go so that I can minister to them as Jesus would.Then I continue to present my body as a living sacrifice: "Here are my hands, Lord. I give them to you today so that what I do with them will bring honor to you.” Hands that are given over to God will be busy servant hands, doing things for others.Once while visiting a dear godly woman, her husband commented that she was always on the clean-up crew at church, staying behind and mopping and cleaning when everyone else had left. She replied, "I do it for Jesus, so what difference does it make if I'm mopping?”Those are hands given to God as a living sacrifice. Nothing is too menial for them to do; nothing too hard; nothing beneath them.So, our hands and feet are a good place to start with as a daily living sacrifice. Wherever you are right now—wherever you're headed—would you offer your hands and feet as a living sacrifice? Tell the Lord that you want them to be in his control, not yours. You may be surprised to see what God wants to do with your hands and feet when they are living sacrifices.
You've probably heard lots of sermons on Romans 12:1-2, where we are told to offer our bodies as living sacrifices. Does that mean check into a monastery, walk on hot coals, throw ourselves to the lions? We want to get a biblical view of what it means to present your body as a living sacrifice.This sacrifice is a living one, not dead. That's encouraging. Presenting our bodies does not imply some physical death or bodily punishment. But what does it mean?Well, we read in Romans 6:19b: Just as you used to offer the parts of your body in slavery to impurity and to ever-increasing wickedness, so now offer them in slavery to righteousness leading to holiness. Did you ever realize that you've been offering your body as a sacrifice all along? It's true; we all do it throughout life. For example, when you relinquish your feet to go where sin takes you, to the wrong places, your feet are slaves to impurity and wickedness. When your tongue speaks words that hurt and harm, your hands to do things that are not pleasing to God, your eyes and ears see and hear the trash of this world, that’s what it means to sacrifice parts of your body to impurity. And we’ve all done it.Some people sacrifice their bodies to meaningless and trivial things. While they might not be classified as evil, their hands and feet, eyes and ears, tongues and hearts are sacrificed to time-consuming activities that are largely insignificant.But, as a child of God, you and I have the opportunity to offer our bodies as a living sacrifice to bring glory to Jesus. Instead of using your body in acts of evil and triviality, you can, if you choose to, be a part of God's eternal plan and have his power working through your body. Then your hands and eyes and feet and tongue—and all your other body parts—will be living sacrifices to God instead of to evil. And this leads to holiness in your life. Presenting your body as a living sacrifice begins to sound more like a privilege than a drudgery, doesn't it?But the question remains: How do you offer your body as a living sacrifice? I've found some practical ways of doing that on a daily basis that have made a difference in my life.
When I say the word "sacrifice," what comes to your mind? Some words I associate with "sacrifice" are relinquishing, giving away, losing. Not exactly words to warm our hearts, are they? At least, not our human hearts, which on their own are not prone to want to sacrifice anything.The first two verses of Romans 12 are about sacrifice:“Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will” (Romans 12:1-2).There’s that word: sacrifice. Have you ever wondered exactly what it means to give your body as a living sacrifice? It conjures up visions of burning at the stake, being attacked by lions, and other similarly distasteful events.Then, when I think that my life is full of activity and schedules and commitments, I wonder how am I supposed to do all this and sacrifice at the same time?Well, it's good to note that it is to be a living sacrifice. This is not a sacrifice to take our lives away from us, but one that requires us to keep on living. But what does it mean to be a living sacrifice?A dictionary definition of sacrifice says: The surrender or destruction of something prized or desirable for the sake of something considered as having a higher claim. I think this definition comes close to what Paul had in mind. A living sacrifice would require surrender of something we all prize—our bodies—for something that has a higher purpose—worshiping the God of all creation, who has given us this life to begin with.But the question becomes: How do we live day in and day out as a living sacrifice to God? How do we offer our bodies as living sacrifices?
Let’s take a look at some key areas where our attitudes can easily start to go downhill, and then see what the Bible has to say. I imagine you'll be able to relate to some of these.Griping and ComplainingHave you ever been around someone who loved disasters and crises? I've run into that person on a job or two of mine. They gripe about everything and everybody and seem to really enjoy spreading any bad news they can dig up. Even when there's something good happening, they'll find the fly in the ointment and do their best to spoil the good times for everyone else. You know that person can get on your nerves after a while!It’s become normal and acceptable for employees to complain and gripe about the company and the management. How often do you hear coworkers complaining about the way the company is run, the pay scale, the work environment, the benefits—you name it. And here’s the thing: When others start complaining and griping around us, we almost feel like we have to agree with them or join in because otherwise we’re kind of weird.And of course, we as Christ-followers are just as susceptible to this griping and complaining disease as anyone else. But the difference is—or should be—that we determine by God’s grace not to be a part of that scene.There's a verse in the Bible that addresses this: Do everything without complaining or arguing (Philippians 2:14)."Everything" leaves no room for fudging because it includes your unfair wages, the difficult boss, the annoying co-worker, the way the company treats you—and even the weather! Complaining is such a waste of energy and it's stressful on you as well as everyone around you!A friend of mine works for an organization that truly fights this griping culture from the top down. And one of their work mottos is—simply—“No whining.” It’s an attitude that is encouraged because it makes such a difference in the work product as well as the environment. Attitudes really are contagious, and you can be a part of passing on to others a good attitude, a positive one.That doesn’t mean that you don’t recognize and, when necessary, confront issues that need to change. But griping and complaining never changed anything except to make things worse.As you do your job, ask God to keep you from complaining. Stop in mid-sentence if you have to and refuse to get caught up in this complaining tendency. In fact, I have a card taped to my desk that says, “Today I will not complain about anything!” Just a helpful reminder, and if you go to our website, you’ll find this devotional there and at the end a card that you can print and use as a reminder, too. Doing your job without complaining is one of the strongest testimonies you can have for Jesus Christ.Don't Like the JobDid you know that studies show that almost half of the people in the workplace report that they really don't like their jobs? Wow, that's rather discouraging. I can just visualize those thousands and thousands of people doing jobs each day and dreading it. Reminds me of that old commercial about the man whose job was to bake donuts everyday. You remember that one: "Time to make the donuts." You could just see it in his face and hear it in his voice; he hated to make those donuts.Can people see in your face and hear in your voice that you hate your job? I well remember having a new job which looked so interesting when I accepted it but was so boring once I began working there. I did not like the job content, and as a result, I didn’t work very hard, I couldn’t wait for the days to end, and I wanted to blame others—like my manager—for the fact that I didn’t like my job.You know, if you don’t like your job and that is affecting the way you work, you need to do some soul searching and pray about that attitude. There may be good reasons you don’t like your job, but there’s no good reason to harbor a bad attitude about it. There’s nothing wrong with looking for a different job where you’ll e...
When doing the right thing causes an embarrassing situation, are you quick to chicken out? Fran and her friend, Barry, find themselves in such a dilemma. They agreed to go with some new friends, Max and Claire, to a movie, only to discover a few minutes into it that it's not the kind of thing they want to watch, even if it was rated PG-13.So Barry rather abruptly and decisively informed Max that he and Fran would meet them after the movie ended, and they headed out of the theater. Sitting next door at the coffee shop, waiting for the movie to end, Barry and Fran have an opportunity to discuss whether it was right to cause that little scene or just sit through the movie to avoid embarrassing their new friends. Barry is convinced that you never compromise your standards, and as they're finishing their coffee, they look up to see Max and Claire coming in."Hey," Claire says, "I thought we'd find you here. We decided to leave, too.""Hi," Fran says; "I'm sorry about leaving so abruptly but. . .""It was my decision, Claire," Barry interrupts. "And I do apologize if we embarrassed you. I just felt the movie was so far off base, that it was nothing either of us should watch.""Well, I thought it was pretty dumb myself," Max agrees."What bugged me," Barry says, "was that they were portraying this angel in such an immoral way. I don't think Jesus would watch that movie, do you?""No, I guess not," Max says, "I hadn't thought about that. . .""You know, what I've finally decided is that you have to set standards and then stick to them. Often as Christians we lower our standards a little bit here and a little bit there, and all of a sudden, we're on a slippery slope downhill."And with that, a long discussion begins, giving Barry and Fran a wonderful opportunity to share and to encourage their new friends in their walk as Christians. It turned into a wonderful evening, actually.On the way home, Fran takes Barry's hand. "I was so proud to be with you tonight, Barry. You were incredible. Thank you so much for taking that stand and handling it so beautifully.""Thanks, Fran," he says, "but you weren't real sure at first, were you?""Well, you know me, I want to avoid conflict at any cost; sometimes you just can't do that, can you?" she comments."Not if you want to be a true disciple," Barry agrees. "And by the way, I was proud to be with you too. But then I always am.”She smiles at him. What a man! Quietly she thanks Jesus for the courage and character Barry showed.
Did you ever find yourself in the middle of a compromising situation but you didn't know how to extricate yourself? Fran and Barry are about to find themselves in such a predicament. A new couple, Max and Claire, from their singles' group at church asked them to have dinner and go to a movie with them this Saturday evening, and wanting to build bridges of friendship, they agreed.After a nice dinner, Max suggests a movie about an angel. Fran and Barry know nothing of it, but Claire assures them it's okay because it's rated PG-13. So, they get settled into the theater with their popcorn, looking forward to a lighthearted funny movie.About ten minutes into the movie, Fran begins to feel nervous. This portrayal of an angel is about as far from a biblical angel as one can get. She can tell that Barry is not comfortable with it either.After a few more minutes, Barry puts his arm around Fran and whispers in her ear, "We can't sit through this movie, Fran. This is trash—a fornicating angel. No way; we have to leave.""I agree it's a rotten movie," she whispers back, "but wouldn't it be rather embarrassing to Max and Claire for us to leave?""I'll take care of that, Fran, don't worry," he says, and with that he whispers something to Max and then takes Fran's hand as they head out of the theater.As they get to the lobby, Fran is flushed. "What did you tell Max?" she asks."I just said we were uncomfortable with the movie, and we'd meet them right outside the lobby when it's over. C'mon, let's go get a cup of coffee.""But Barry, I'm not sure we did the right thing. These are new friends we're trying to build a relationship with; what must they think of us?" Fran asks. "I really think we should have discussed it first.""Fran, how were we going to discuss it there in the movie theater?" Barry asks. "Would you want to be watching that movie if Jesus returned right now?""No," Fran says, "but I just feel badly for Max and Claire.""Trust me, Fran," Barry says, "we did the right thing."As they have a cup of coffee, the air between them becomes heavy. Fran feels Barry should have been more considerate of her feelings in this matter. Yet she can't deny that his decision was right.Sensing her uneasiness, Barry says, "Are you upset with me? I didn't see any other options, Fran, and when you're with me, I consider it my responsibility to keep our environment above reproach. I believe I'm accountable to God for where I escort you, Fran. That's why I made that decision."She looks at him in amazement. "I'm seeing a side of you I've never seen before, Barry," she says."I hope you like it okay," Barry says with a smile, "because I like every side I've seen of you, Fran."How can she stay upset with a man like this? But what about Max and Claire?
We're continuing our story of Fran and Jesus on the Job. Barry, Fran’s friend, just lost a new account, and it's become obvious that he lost it because of his strong Christian principles. Fran has had more trouble accepting this than Barry, but after talking to Jesus, she realizes this is not a fight that can be undertaken with the weapons of the world, but it must be fought with prayer.Now, this Saturday morning, Fran is thinking of what she can do to lift Barry's spirit, and she gets an idea. She calls Barry and says, "Hey, instead of going out to dinner tonight, let me prepare a quiet dinner for the two of us and we'll have our own little celebration, to celebrate the victory that God is going to win for you!""Hey, Fran," Barry says, "you're a doll to think of that, but did you forget—we promised Max and Claire that we'd have dinner with them and catch a movie.""Oh, right," Fran says, "I did forget. Bummer! I'd much rather have a quiet celebration with you.”"Yeah, me too," Barry says, "but Max and Claire are new at church, and we need to get to know them better."So, Fran gets busy with all her Saturday chores and errands before time to go out. They meet Max and Claire at a nice little Italian restaurant and enjoy some good pasta and then leave for the movie."Hey, what movie do you want to go to?" Barry asks.Max suggests a movie rated PG-13 and they agree it sounds okay.But Fran has a funny feeling in her stomach. Hollywood isn't trustworthy and sometimes their PG-13s are more like R-rated, and she’s concerned about this one since she doesn’t know anything about it.As they wait in line for tickets, Fran says to Barry on the side, "I wonder about this movie, don't you, Barry? What if it's no good?""We'll leave," Barry says quietly."Well, we can't just leave Max and Claire," Fran says, somewhat startled."We don't watch junk, right Fran," Barry says as he takes her arm and they go into the theater.Well, Fran wanted a strong man with lots of character—I'd say Barry seems to be living up to her expectations!
Have you ever suffered a setback in your career because of your Christian lifestyle? Fran's friend, Barry, has just had that painful experience. He was in line to be awarded a big new national account, but it was given to a less-qualified person. And the unspoken but clear reason for this decision by upper management is that Barry's Christian principles prohibit him from being a part of the acceptable "party and drinking scene" which this client seems to expect.Fran is upset because Barry is not going to fight the decision. Driving home from work this Friday afternoon, after a long discussion with Barry which almost turned into an argument, she says to Jesus, "Lord, this is not fair. Barry should stand up for his rights. You don't expect us to just lay down and roll over when we're treated unfairly, do you?""Fran," Jesus quietly replies, "don't you remember what I said in the Sermon on the Mount?""You mean the 'turn the other cheek' part? Yes, but Lord does that mean we're supposed to be door mats? What kind of testimony is that?" Fran replies."Fran," Jesus continues, "you should know by now that as a follower of me, you don't live by the same rules as others. The weapons you fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds.""Yeah, I know," Fran says, "but it's just so hard to accept it. I feel so bad for Barry. He's such a great guy and he would handle that account imminently better than Lloyd. It's just so hard....""Remember, Fran," Jesus says, "this is not the end of the story. Barry said he was letting go and trusting me, and you're going to have to do the same thing.""He's a lot better at that than I am," Fran says. "It almost seems like he's a little wimpy. But I guess….""Don't confuse acceptance and submission with weakness, Fran," Jesus reminds her. "It takes a lot more character and strength to let go than it does to fight."That evening she and Barry talk on the phone, and they agree this is a matter that only God can adequately resolve. So, they pray together about it, and Fran tells Jesus she will indeed let go of it."I really admire your ability to trust God, Barry," Fran says, "even in the midst of a disappointment. I've learned a lesson by watching how you're handling this.""Gee, Fran," Barry says, "I don't feel like I'm handling it so great. It still hurts, but I believe if I fight it, I'll just mess things up worse. Have to tell you, though, I was already spending that additional income. There's something I want to buy. . . oh, well, in God's time."Fran wonders what he's talking about, but she's afraid to ask!
For those who aren't familiar with the Fran stories, Fran is a young widow with two school-aged children, who has a job in a marketing organization. We've been following her story since she went back to work after her husband's untimely death, and several years have passed. Now she has a relationship with a man named Barry, who is a strong Christian, and their romance has brought a bright spot into Fran's life—as well as a few struggles and conflicts!She and Barry work together and both are account reps with good track records and success. Their hard work and honesty have paid off, and they are held in high esteem by their management and coworkers. This Friday morning Fran is really excited for Barry, because she expects he will be awarded a big new national account. He's the right person for that account, and their manager, Marilyn, has indicated that she recommended him. The final decision is to be made today, so it's been hard for Fran to stay focused.The phone rings just about lunch time, and it's her friend and fellow believer, Louise. "Hi, Fran," Louise says, "just wanted to tell you how sorry I am for Barry.""What do you mean, Louise?" Fran asks with a lump in her throat."Oh, no, you haven't heard! Oh, I'm sorry. Barry didn't get the new account; it went to Lloyd.""Lloyd? Why Lloyd?" Fran asks in bewilderment. "Lloyd isn't nearly as qualified as Barry - and Marilyn told Barry. . .""I know, I know," Louise says, "nobody knows why Lloyd got it instead of Barry. I just feel so bad for Barry.""Thanks for letting me know, Louise," Fran says. "I need to find Barry. Talk to you later."She hangs up and calls Barry; no answer. His office is up on the next floor, but she just can't sit still and wait any longer. So she heads for his office, taking the shortcut up the stairwell. As she's going up, Barry is coming down."Oh, Barry," Fran says, "I was headed for your office. Louise just told me. . .""Yeah, can you believe it?” He looks at her with a slight grin. "Marilyn told me Lloyd was selected because of his quote 'experience with entertaining large national accounts.'""What did she mean?" Fran asks."Oh, I think it's clear—somebody decided that I wouldn't be willing to wine and dine this client as they expect to be," Barry replies."You mean because you're a Christian and they know you don't carouse like some of the other reps do?" Fran replies. "Barry, that's discrimination. Didn't you protest to Marilyn?""Look, she feels as badly about it as I do," Barry says, "and she's a fairly new believer, so I'm not going to hassle her, Fran.""You mean, you're not going to fight this, Barry?” Fran can't believe her ears."No, I prayed about it, and I have to trust God and let it go," Barry tells her.Whoa, would you be willing to do that? Shouldn't Barry fight for what is rightly his?
Even though the topic of discipline is one of those non-emotional topics which doesn't bring tears to anyone's eyes or generate a great deal of response, it’s so essential to our lives in so many ways. To ignore the need for discipline in our lives is to invite disaster. Proverbs says, "fools despise wisdom and discipline," (Proverbs 1:7) and " whoever disregards discipline comes to poverty and shame” (Proverbs 13:18). It also tells us that a person who ignores discipline despises himself, and that a person can die from lack of discipline!But we are told in Proverbs 6:23 that "the corrections of discipline are the way to life." The Book of Proverbs is an excellent book to guide us in the necessary disciplines for a fruitful life. In the first chapter, verse 2, we see that the whole book of Proverbs was written for "receiving instruction in prudent behavior.”Well, how about you? Does discipline come easy or hard for you? Maybe it's easy in some places and hard in others. That's what I find in my life. I've got some disciplines going really well but other disciplines are lacking. I've noticed that I often miss the mark on what we call some small areas where I need to be more disciplined. But they're not really small to God because when I refuse to be disciplined even in small areas, it is in fact rebellion against God—against his control in those areas of my life.I find myself rationalizing: "Well, I'm really a very disciplined person in the important areas; these are just little nits that don't amount to anything.” Or the rationalization which says, "Look, you're so disciplined in most areas of your life, you deserve some time off for good behavior. You've earned your right to be undisciplined here in these little things.”But that lack of discipline is not just a little shortcoming on my part; lack of discipline is sin. James 4:17 tells us that "Anyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do and doesn't do it, it is sin for them.” So, let's call lack of discipline what it is, even in those small areas: sin. That way we get God's view of the situation, and we're more likely to get serious about putting necessary disciplines in our lives.Let's talk about some typical areas where discipline is often lacking. First, there's procrastination; putting off to a later time what we could and should do right now. Funny how we can find all the energy we need to do things we like to do, but we're just too exhausted or too busy to get to those more unpleasant things, so we procrastinate. Can you relate to that?Here's a motto that I strongly encourage you to adopt: Do it right and do it now! That's a totally biblical principle. We're told in Ecclesiastes that “whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might” (9:10), and Jesus warned his disciples that “as long as it is day, we must do the works of him who sent me. Night is coming, when no one can work” (John 9:4).Do it right and do it now! If that's a discipline lacking in your life? Are your talents wasting, your goals unfulfilled, your plans and programs never getting off the ground because you keep procrastinating? It is truly a deadly bad habit.Where have you been procrastinating lately? Why don't you do it right and do it now, and get it off your mind? You'd be surprised how much those procrastinations are rattling around in your brain, gumming up the works, slowing down the thinking processes, keeping you from being optimally effective.Clear the mind; do those things you know you should do. Whether they're little ones or giant ones, they begin with the first step. If you're like me, I'm okay once I make the first step. But oh my, it's so difficult to make that first step sometimes.Another area where our discipline can be lacking is that of being faithful—doing what you said you'd do. Do you know people who glibly offer to help, or promise to do something, but they have a tendency to let those things slide, forget about them,
Would you say that you could use a little encouragement? It could be that you’re just discouraged. Things aren’t going the way you want them to, finances are difficult, your health may not be the best, relationships could be strained and unpleasant. Life has a way of sapping our joy, doesn’t it? It could be that you truly need some encouragement right now.Well, if so, I want to suggest you follow the three principles of sowing and reaping, which are: You reap what you sow. You reap in a different season than you sow. You reap more than you sow.Therefore, if you need encouragement, then sow some encouragement. Encourage someone else, and that seed of encouragement will come back to you in abundance. It may not come right away, but it will come. You will reap encouragement in season, even more than you can imagine.Isaiah 1:17 reminds us, “Learn to do right! Seek justice, encourage the oppressed.” The Apostle Paul was continually encouraging people and admonishing new believers to be encouragers. In 1 Thessalonians 5:11 he said, “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.” Notice how he complimented them while at the same time encouraging them to encourage each other.This should be a trademark of a Christian—to be an encouraging person. And becoming an encourager is something all of us can do. I trust these simple ideas I’ve shared with you will cause you to stop and think about what you can do to be a more effective encourager—to be a Barnabas in your workplace.
Here are a few more simple things you can do to become a Barnabas—an encourager—where you work: Be a good employee. It’s not always easy to submit to your boss, but that is what Christians in the workplace are to do. When given instructions, follow them—unless they would cause you to betray your integrity. Just being a good employee will be encouraging to your boss, if no one else, but it also sets a good example for others. Take second place. Be willing to be the last in line, to take the worst seat, to let someone else take credit. That’s not easy to do sometimes, but it’s the servant attitude that Jesus had, and we need to have it as well. Apologize. If you’ve made a mistake, done something you should not have done, said something you should not have said, own up to it as soon as possible and simply apologize. A friend of mine says the biggest difference between her and her coworkers who are not believers is that she apologizes more than they do! Well, an apology can go a long way toward relieving tension in relationships, and it will indeed be an act of encouragement.Truthfully, how many encouraging words do you hear in a normal day? In many work environments, they are few and far between. But if you become a Barnabas on your job, and with sincerity you offer words of encouragement, you will become a beacon of light in that world. So, you can become a Barnabas—a person who refuses to be discouraged, and instead, offers words of encouragement to those around you. It’s what Jesus would do, and this is one simple but important way you can be his ambassador right where you work.
I’m encouraging you to become a Barnabas where you work. And you do that by deciding to do things for people that will encourage them.These ideas I’m sharing with you are often very small things that take little time or money, but they can truly make a difference. So, here are some more creative ways you can be a Barnabas on the job: Offer to help your boss. Really, you could ask your boss what you could do to help him or her, especially if you know that your boss is under a lot of pressure. Bosses need help just like everybody else, yet often they are overlooked. Be sensitive to the sniffles. If someone is under the weather, send a note or offer to help with the workload. Acknowledge good work. When a coworker does something well, you could acknowledge it with a word, or an email, or a written note, just to let them know that someone notices the effort they put into a job and it was appreciated. Offer to pray for a coworker. There are times when a coworker shares a worry or concern with you, either personal or job-related. Instead of allowing it to degrade into a griping or gossip session, simply offer to pray for that person. You may not be able to pray at that moment on the job, but you can assure them that you will remember that situation in prayer. I believe you’ll find that most people are glad for you to pray for them. Listen. If a coworker wants to share a problem with you, take the time to listen and give that person your devoted attention. Obviously, you need to be careful not to take advantage of time you should be working, but a listening ear can be one of the most encouraging things you can do for a coworker.You know, if you become a Barnabas on the job, as you encourage people, you will be amazed at how God will use you right there as a beacon of his light and love.
The Apostle Paul wrote to Philemon that “Your love has given me great joy and encouragement, because you, brother, have refreshed the hearts of the saints” (Philemon 1:7). What a wonderful tribute to Philemon. Wouldn’t you like someone to say that about you?Well, we can all become encouragers if we decide to do some specific things for the purpose of encouraging others. Here are some more practical ideas that you can do on your job to encourage others: Smile! Did you realize that by a simple smile you could cheer someone up and encourage someone? Smiles are contagious and can brighten the atmosphere where you work. When talking to or passing by others, just turn up the corners of your mouth and flash them a radiant smile. Costs you nothing, and it could really make a difference in someone’s day. Greet people! As you enter the workplace, greet coworkers with a simple, “Good morning.” You never know the energy it took for others to arrive at work. A pleasant greeting can start a person’s day off right and possibly help them forget about their troubles. Be the Welcome Committee. When a new employee joins the staff, introduce yourself and offer to be of assistance. Help that person find his or her way around, offer to have lunch together. Think how comforting it could be to that new colleague, because being the new person can be challenging and a little frightening. Share your lunch. If you’re not working remotely, this is an easy way to get to know someone. Or if you baked something special and have some leftovers, bring it in for others to enjoy. Remotely, you could schedule a one-on-one zoom to catch up during lunch time.You may think that these don’t sound that impressive or important, but it is so often the little things that we remember to do that touch someone else, helps them see they are not forgotten, and they are encouraged. Become an encourager on the job. It will make a difference.
Do you have a nickname? Often we get stuck with nicknames from our childhood, or based on a certain characteristic, and it may not necessarily be flattering. However, there is one person in the Bible who was given a nickname because of a very wonderful trait. His name was Joseph, but the apostles called him Barnabas, which means Son of Encouragement. You can read about him in Acts 4.Imagine people calling you a name that signified you were an encouraging person. I can’t think of a greater compliment, can you? I want to show you how you can become a Barnabas in your workplace; you can be known as a person who encourages others. A good friend, Traci Mason, has compiled these ideas and allowed me to share them with you.We all recognize that often our workplaces are full of discouragement, especially in the aftermath of the pandemic. But this just gives us a perfect opportunity to help others by becoming an encouraging person. Now, mind you, this will take some time and effort on your part, but the return on your investment will be eternal!So, here are some practical ways you can become a Barnabas where you work: Write notes. Handwritten notes are almost extinct. Keep a supply of note cards and encourage colleagues by placing a note on their desk, in their mailbox, or in their hand. It’s easy to make personalized cards on our computers now; so get creative and write a note just to encourage someone. Send e-cards. It’s really easy to send an e-card to your coworkers just to let them know you are thinking of them. You can even send the same card to multiple addresses. Employees receive messages that make requests and give instructions. They would surely welcome something more pleasant in the in-box, and an e-card would be a pleasant surprise. Remember birthdays. Find out the birthdates of coworkers, put them on your calendar, and simply give each coworker a birthday card to help them celebrate their special day. I’ve begun doing that for the women in my church, and we send out birthday cards here too, and I’ve been amazed at how many people are encouraged to receive a special birthday card—and it’s so easy to do!
Presented by Lisa BishopLife will not always go the way you planned and there will be many times your peace can be disrupted, even rocked. So I want to spend some time anchoring us in God’s Word because frankly, we all need reminders of truth to keep us grounded when times are rough.It is easy to feel peace when everything (or at least most things) in life are going well, but let’s be honest. When you hit bumps in the road, when disappointments, delays or losses strike, holding onto peace, well it can feel like it’s slipping through your hands.A good friend of mine called me the other day to let me know her husband was let go from his job. They have two kids, no savings, they had just paid off their debt, and boom. Out of seemingly nowhere their only source of income was stripped away. Food stamps, frugality, and freezing all unnecessary purchases would soon become their reality. The circumstances certainly called for panic, but my friend was determined to hold onto her peace.When is a time where your peace was threatened? A sudden job loss, a conflict in a relationship, financial strain, your reputation being called into question. Maybe you are currently experiencing anxiety, nervousness, fear of the future, or inner turbulence over circumstances in your life. A lack of peace can feel intrusive. Ruminative thought patterns, racing heartbeat, intense feelings of uncertainty, worry, depression—that heaviness that just sits on your chest like a ton of bricks.We have all felt peace lacking in our lives, so what do you do when the inevitable pervasive peacelessness happens? How do you prepare for seasons that threaten to throw you off kilter and into a sea of unsettledness? The Bible is filled with verses that instruct us about peace. Various forms of the word peace are found 429 times in the King James version of the Bible so it must be an important thing for you to grasp, or better yet for peace to get a hold of you.Yet why does peace seem so evasive? I think one reason is because we can tend to intellectualize peace rather than receive the peace that is ours in Jesus and by the power of his Holy Spirit. We read the 400+ verses of peace in the Bible but it just sounds like a nice benefit of following Jesus and we don’t receive it as a birthright.If we are honest, we can think that peace is something we muster up or need to strive for rather than settle into, and our self-effort disappoints over the long haul. I am not saying that we do not have to work hard to experience peace, we do. We need to be intentional about believing what God’s Word says about peace, believe that Jesus and Holy Spirit are our peace, and make an effort to live into what is already given us. But too often we resort to human striving to create peace rather than the supernatural receiving of it.You know the saying, “When life gives you lemons…. Make lemonade.”It is a proverbial phrase used to encourage optimism and a positive can-do attitude in the face of adversity or misfortune. Lemons being analogous to the sourness or difficulty in life and making lemonade meaning turning them into something positive or desirable. While the concept is not a bad one, and it is important to have a positive perspective, real lasting peace has more depth, sustainability and stability when we find it first and foremost in the person of Jesus Christ.In John 14:25-27 after three years of earthly ministry, Jesus, as he prepares his disciples for his physical departure from earth says to them, “All this I have spoken while still with you. But the Advocate, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you. Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” Don’t miss this! This is huge. Jesus is departing his earthly dwelling and imparting a greater gift to ...
We have been exploring what God’s Word has to say about peace and another aspect of peace is the peace of obedience.Proverbs 3:1-2 says, “My son, do not forget my teaching, but let your heart keep my commandments, for length of days and years of life and peace they will add to you.”King Solomon’s words of wisdom are a discerning guide for us to follow in our own lives. When Solomon says “my teaching” and “my commandments” he is not talking about his own personal decrees. He is pointing to God’s Word that he made personal by following. And remembering God’s laws are more than a mental exercise; it is connected to a life of obedience, internalizing them and living them out daily.When you walk in step with God’s Word you will experience union with him, and this obedience adds peace to your life. Sometimes we can be tempted to look at God’s Word as a burden or list of “to do’s” but that is not the sentiment. God’s Word is not a list of rules; they are an invitation to an intimate relationship with Jesus. Jesus came so that you would have a rich and satisfying life and this can only be found in him. When you abide in Jesus and obey God’s Word you will be as Psalm 1 says like a tree planted by streams of living water bearing fruit in your life.A lack of obedience in your life, sin, leads to death. It looks tempting at the time but as proverbs 14:12 says, “You can rationalize it all you want and justify the path of error you have chosen, but you’ll find out in the end that you took the road to destruction.”We’ve all been there. We all sin and fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23). And praise God for Jesus who covers our sin and for His Holy Spirit that leads us (Psalm 143:10).Psalm 32 gives us a glimpse into the power of confession as King David prays to the Lord. The Psalm itself does not tell us the specific occasion in David’s life which prompted this song but from his words we can surmise that he had strayed from obeying God when he says, “When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long. For day and night your hand was heavy on me; my strength was sapped as in the heat of summer. Then I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity. I said, 'I will confess my transgressions to the Lord.' And you forgave the guilt of my sin” (Psalm 32:3-5).Sin robs your peace; confession restores it as you receive the forgiveness of Jesus. Shame will never transform you, the love of Jesus will. Obedience leads to peace.As we wrap up today receive this blessing from 2 Thessalonians 3:16. “Now may the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times in every way.”
I once read a quote that said, “Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is the power to choose our response. In that response lies our growth and our freedom.”You may be wondering what peace has to do with pausing. Well let me ask you this. How many times have you given your peace away or broken peace by being reactive? Something happens or someone says something that you do not like or agree with, and you fire back in a not so calm and peaceful way. You shoot an arrow or throw a grenade with your words.I see a lot of this on social media platforms. It’s embarrassing really. Especially between people who say they love and follow Jesus. What a terrible witness we give to the world when we cannot even get along with each other. Unity amongst believers matters to God. And that does not mean we will always agree with each other on everything, but it does mean instead of letting our fangs come out in the heat of moments we steward our words and actions to bear the spiritual fruit of peace.“As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace” (Ephesians 4:1-3). In his letter to the Ephesians Paul is calling believers up to a higher standard when disagreements surface.Romans 12:17-18 admonishes, “Never pay back evil with more evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable. Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone.”Do all you can. This will take humility and Holy restraint! But you have it in you fellow believer. Better yet, you have him in you who is greater than your rapid fire words of retribution. Galatians 5:16 reminds us of this, “So I say, let the Holy Spirit guide your lives. Then you won’t be doing what your sinful nature craves.”So, bite your tongue and usher in the presence of Jesus. Practice the pause and make the choice to tap into your source of peace, the Holy Spirit, who will guide you to speak in the tongues of angels, divine love, and not in destructive words like a noisy gong or clanging cymbal. We can respond thoughtfully and passionately disagree without being hateful. The world is watching how we treat one another. Show them who you believe in by the way you love. Before your lips leap, practice a holy pause.And from the very mouth of Jesus, “Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another” (John 13:34a-35).
Are you a peace-filled person? When you enter a room do you bring a sense of peace?The Holy Spirit can often be the most neglected part of the Trinity. Many churches don’t acknowledge the Holy Spirit or his power in our lives and there are many Christians that have few if any real encounters with him.Jesus signaled the significance of the Holy Spirit as he was preparing the disciples for his departure from earth. As the book of John recounts in chapter 14:15-17, Jesus told his disciples, “If you love me, obey my commandments. And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate, who will never leave you. He is the Holy Spirit, who leads into all truth.”Jesus wanted them to know—he wants you to know—that he is with you always because his Holy Spirit dwells in you. And that the Holy Spirit amongst many things acts as your Advocate. Other versions of the Bible say, your Counselor, which translated from the Greek word paraklētos means, “Called to one’s side; helper; aider.” Jesus says that the Holy Spirit was destined to take his place after his ascension to the Father, to lead the disciples to a deeper knowledge of the Gospel truth, and give them divine strength needed to enable them to undergo trials and persecutions on behalf of the divine kingdom (Strong’s Bible Concordance).This matters to you because as a follower of Jesus the Holy Spirit is your counselor and you have been given that same divine presence, peace, and power.When we think of the Holy Spirit our minds often picture a dove which has become a symbol of peace. The Holy Spirit, pictured as a dove at Jesus’ baptism, symbolized peace with God (Matthew 3:16).In John 20:21-22, Jesus said, "Peace be with you! As the Father has sent me, I am sending you." And with that he breathed on them and said, "Receive the Holy Spirit."As you abide in Christ, the Holy Spirit produces peace in your life. Peace is the byproduct of walking and being filled with the Holy Spirit. Peace resides in you, and you have full access at all times. And, as you carry the Holy Spirit with you and acknowledge his presence, any time you enter a room, you change the atmosphere. His presence in you has the power to impact those around you.The Holy Spirit is the presence of God in the life of a believer. Don’t settle for a life that lacks peace and divine power. Ask God to awaken and increase your sensitivity to the divine power of his presence, his Holy Spirit within you.
Have you ever felt like you just don’t belong—like an outsider, overlooked, dismissed or maybe even abandoned?The other day I was at church. After the service I saw a friend of mine I had not seen in several weeks. We caught each other's gaze and started up a conversation when within seconds someone else came by and my friend turned to them, mid-sentence mind you, and started to chat them up. I thought for sure it would be a brief hello and then she would circle back to me, but minutes passed by as I stood there and it was clear that her conversation would not be ending anytime soon.First, I will admit that one of my pet peeves is when people do not pay attention to the person in front of them. It bugs me when people are easily distracted and clearly not present. But the situation this particular morning went deeper for me because instead of chalking up the encounter as no big deal and moving on, my mind started to wander and ruminate on thoughts of unworthiness. I know that may sound weird or overly sensitive. And I do not consider myself to be an overly sensitive person.One of the old wounds and lies that the enemy tries to dig up and poke at is one I grew up believing that had stayed with me for a very long time. “You aren’t really likable. You will never be part of the popular crowd. Nobody really wants you or desires to be around you.” While Jesus has done a lot of healing for me in that area, if I am not diligent, the devil will take old thoughts and lies and serve them right up on a silver platter trying to get me to feast on them. And that is what was happening that morning at church. Thank the good Lord, literally, that I was able to discern the devil’s deception in those moments, reject the lie and turn my mind to truth. I am included in Christ Jesus. (Ephesians 1:11). You are included!1 Peter 5:8-9 beckons us; “Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings.”Be alert. Stand firm. Don’t buy into falsehoods but anchor yourself firmly in your faith, in what is true.Studies show that addressing our dysfunctional thinking, or in other words, rejecting the lies of the enemy and replacing them with truth, is the single most effective intervention to overcoming that dreadful feeling of not belonging.So, whose voice are you listening to? (The enemy wants to destroy your peace and he will go to great lengths to find the weak spot of your wounds and use them to manipulate your thoughts and feelings.)The only one who deserves any airtime in your head in Jesus so turn your thoughts over to him.
Have you ever had your peace disrupted? You know that was really a leading question. We have all experienced numerous times in our lives when our peace has been jolted. There are times where you cannot control what comes your way and attempts to disrupt your peace. There are other times when we ourselves are the culprits of forsaking our own peace.The other day I woke up to do my typical morning quiet time. It’s a routine of reading the Bible and sitting in a time of stillness with Jesus. But instead of digging right into the Word I did something I had done more times than I would like to admit. I picked up my phone and started scrolling. Within seconds I felt my peace leak out being replaced with anxiousness, and a feeling of uneasiness creeping in. As I was “harmlessly” flipping through people’s social media updates I inadvertently started comparing my life with theirs. It was unconscious but I became astutely aware when my barometer of peace dropped, and negative thoughts started pelting me like hail on a stormy day. Thoughts of unworthiness and inadequacy flooded my mind. “Who do you think you are?” “You are not good enough or qualified enough.” “That person is way farther along and more accomplished than you. “You do not have what it takes.” I could feel myself sinking fast and it was my fault. I did not guard my mind. I sacrificed my peace for a few minutes on my phone. I let the enemy have a foothold in my mind and disparaging thoughts ran rampant.Proverbs 4:23 warns about being intentional about protecting your peace when it says, “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it..”The Passion translation says it this way: “So above all, guard the affections of your heart, for they affect all that you are. Pay attention to the welfare of your innermost being, for from there flows the wellspring of life.” The word heart is translated from the Hebrew word meaning mind, knowledge, thinking, consciousness.If your mind and heart are infiltrated and polluted with comparison and thoughts of incompetence, insufficiency, or inferiority, the enemy will have a field day force feeding you lies, and your peace will be compromised. You have a choice on what you fill your mind with. So, the next time you are tempted to grab your phone instead of meditating on the Word of God remember this: Scripture before screen time! Let the Word of God dwell in you richly before compromising your peace with comparison and social media.
No matter what you do on your job each day, you have developed skills and abilities through that job that are valuable. I have a friend who is teaching communication skills in a very different cross-cultural place overseas. As she was telling me what she does and how she has learned to communicate in this challenging setting, I told her that the skills she is learning and her experience in this job, though difficult at times, are giving her skills and abilities that are rare and very valuable. She’s learning “on the job” as we say, and that knowledge and skill is making her a much more valuable employee.Certainly, that’s been true in my life, as well, as I spent many years conducting training seminars in my company and for many other companies across the country. That experience of putting together and making an effective presentation is a skill that God was teaching me through my job—and one he now uses for ministry purposes.But what I want to talk about is not the performance skills and experience you gain through your employment, as helpful as they are, but the many other life skills and relationship skills you are learning, even though while you’re in the midst of it, it may seem more like baptism by fire rather than a training experience. Here are some examples of the practical and important things you should be learning in a job, if indeed you’re doing a good job. You learn The importance of being on time The importance of meeting deadlines How to work with a team to accomplish a task How critical it is to fulfill your promises and commitments That it’s very important to do everything with excellence, and avoid do-overs That procrastination is deadly That you can’t afford to let things fall between the cracksThose are just some of the practical things you learn when you accept the responsibility of a job. For sure a job well-done will require these kinds of skills. And if you aren’t willing to learn these things, it will affect your progress, your promotions, your paycheck—it will hold you back.So, I would ask you to survey your work habits in these areas. Are you learning these things, or are you resisting them? I’ve often said that a Christ-follower may not be the smartest or the most educated or the most experienced person on their job, but they can be the most dependable, the hardest worker, and have the highest level of integrity. No matter what you do or where God takes you, these characteristics will always be important to your success, to pleasing God.Now, let’s think of some other things God wants to teach you through your job. I think toward the top of that list would be learning to love people you may not like that much! Your coworkers are not necessarily people you would choose to be with five days a week, eight hours a day. No doubt you have discovered that not everyone is “your type,” and so you are challenged to get along with people that are not that easy to get along with.In the 13th chapter of 1 Corinthians, the Bible teaches us the true definition of love. It is patient, it is kind, it looks for the good in people, not the bad, it doesn’t hold grudges, it hangs in with someone when others have given up, it endures all things. God’s love is an action, not necessarily a feeling, and you can choose to love someone by showing them these kinds of actions, even if you don’t like the way they behave, the way they treat you, their work habits, or their lifestyle. Almost any job you have—and that includes working in a Christian environment—places you in the company of other people, and you have the privilege, the great opportunity, to learn to love people with God’s kind of love. That means you become more and more like Jesus, as you follow his commandment to “love one another.”Of course, you also have the option of refusing to learn this lesson, and instead just being continually irritated and negative about the people you work with or for.
If you had to grade yourself on how contented you are, on a scale of one to ten, would you say you are very contented, a ten, or would your grade fall much lower on that scale?Paul wrote to Timothy that “godliness with contentment is great gain.” That’s really what I want to communicate, that we all need to learn to be content with who we are, how God has created us, content with our bodies, our personalities, our gifting, and yes, even our circumstances. And when you are satisfied with who you are, if you then pursue godliness at the same time, you are in for great gain!What kind of gain, you may ask. The gain of knowing you are growing more like Jesus; the gain of seeing how God is using you in the lives of others; the great gain of knowing that Jesus is pleased; you can hear his “Well done, good and faithful servant.” That is the kind of gain that this world can never give you. No success or money or achievement will ever come close to the gain that, as a Christ-follower, you are walking worthy of the Lord Jesus Christ.Peter wrote that “His (Jesus’) divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness” (2 Peter 1:3). When you and I make that the priority of our lives—to live godly lives for the glory of Jesus—and that desire is coupled with contentment, we will have great gain.So often when our circumstances are out of sorts—we've got the wrong job or we live in the wrong place or we don't have enough money or we don't have good health or whatever—we are then tempted to waste our lives and squander our opportunities. If that's where you are, I urge you to pray daily that God will teach you to be content with your circumstances and help you accept what is coming your way. But at the same time, don't settle for life in the doldrums just because the circumstances are rotten.Accept but don't settle; be contented and discontented. You can hold both in balance; you can be more content and appreciative of who you are, just the way God made you, and where your life is right now. But it will also remind you not to let yourself off the hook but always strive to be all that you can be for the glory of Jesus Christ.
I want to encourage you to be very contented with how God has created you. Appreciate God’s creativity in you, and at the same time, never settle for staying where you are in your spiritual growth and maturity. Accept but don’t settle.Your CircumstancesLet me mention one more thing where we need to be contented, and that is with our circumstances. Paul wrote: "I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances" (Philippians 4:11b). Have you learned that lesson yet? Just think about the freedom you and I would have if we could truly say with Paul: "I am content with my circumstances.”I think of a friend whom I admire greatly. She worked for Moody Radio in Chicago for many years, and is a gracious, lovely, talented woman. Due to a work-related accident, her husband was disabled most of their long-married life. When that happened, overnight her dreams of what her life would be like died, as she was forced to become a working woman and raise their children, while helping her disabled husband.When I think of the years she did that, I marvel at her attitude. She never complained; she learned to be content in the midst of very difficult circumstances. And even when more family problems were poured on her head, she continued to trust God and accept what was coming her way.Through all the years she never lost heart or gave up or ran away—all of which I would have been tempted to do. Instead, she contributed immensely to her job and improved herself and did the most anyone could do "under the circumstances," as we say. She comes to my mind as a woman who has accepted the circumstances of her life, and yet they have not beaten her into the ground. She has grown and contributed and made a beautiful life for herself.
Have you accepted the way God has gifted you? The Bible clearly teaches us that each believer has been given definite and recognizable gifts or talents, which are resources to use in serving the Lord.The things God has gifted you to do are the things that make you the happiest and bring the most satisfaction. You'll find great joy when you're functioning the way God created you to.For example, if you have the gift of encouragement, your greatest joy will be to write notes, help someone out, listen to a heartache—lots of things which an encourager does so well. Using your God-given gifts and talents will bring you satisfaction, and you will do those things with enthusiasm and excellence.But here's the other side of the coin: Never be satisfied with your gifts the way they are. Jesus taught us that when we use the gifts and talents he has given us, he will give us more. The Apostle Paul told young Timothy to “fan into a flame the gift of God in you,” and that’s a good prayer you can pray. “Lord, help me do the very most with the gifts you’ve provided for me.”So, accept the talents and gifts God has invested in you, and then set out to grow them as much as possible. Start where you are, with whatever you have to offer, and see where God can take it.Your IntelligenceAre you contented with your intelligence? There's no doubt that God gave some people more brain power than others. Do you feel like you've been short-changed? Well, God needs some real smart brainy types, but he needs a lot of us ordinary types as well.You may not have the highest IQ around, but you've got far more brain power than you realize. Don't settle for where you are intellectually; become a student and continually work at learning more—and you can improve your mind and knowledge whether in school or not, whether young or not-so-young. Good reading habits will make a huge difference. Be curious. Investigate and learn. There are lots of free on-line courses that you can use.
Are you contented with the way God created you? I want to encourage you to be contented with who you are, but not where you are. Like the way God created you, but also strive to be everything God created you to be. An area where you may be discontented is your personality.Your PersonalityEach of us is unique; God doesn't make cookie-cutter Christians. Some of us are “people people;” some are “project people.” Some are extroverts, others are introverts. There are many variations in the personalities God has created. Are you content with the personality God has given you?I think of my friend, Afton, who thought for years that being an introvert was a huge liability. But thankfully she has learned to appreciate the way God created her and she recognizes the many strengths she has because she is quiet and reserved. She has written a book about it, Living Connected: An Introvert’s Guide to Friendship. It’s a very helpful book not only for introverts, but it helps those of us who are not introverts to appreciate and admire those who are.My discontent with my personality was the opposite. I felt I was too up front, too take charge, too much of an extrovert, and for years I tried to be different—and of course, I failed. I remember thinking that sadly, I was stuck with who I was. It has taken me far too long to appreciate the personality God has given to me.The challenge is to be contented with who you are but not where you are in your growth. Focus on the personality flaws that accompany your personality, pray about them, and ask God to help you get rid of the rough edges. For example, I don’t have a natural gift of mercy, but that doesn’t mean I shouldn’t be a merciful person. It’s a weakness I have acknowledged and prayed about, because I need to be merciful as God is merciful to me.There is wonderful freedom in accepting who you are. Freedom from having to live up to other's expectations—or even your own. Freedom from having to be like others or compete with others.
Are you content with who you are? It took years for me to accept and be contented with the way God created me. I had some wrong idea of what God wanted every woman to be and since I didn’t seem to fit that mold, I kept trying to change but I just couldn’t. After years of discontent with the way God created me, I finally understood that God had a good purpose for me and I have learned to appreciate and enjoy how God created me.
However, at the same time, I want to have a holy discontentment with where I am in my growth and maturity. Contentment and lack of contentment at the same time. Or you could say, accepting who I am but not settling for where I am.
Let's look at some specific areas where we often have difficulty accepting who we are, but where we must also never settle for less than we can be.
Your Body
The Bible says that each of us is fearfully and wonderfully made. So, you should accept and be contented with how God's hands made you because God doesn't make mistakes.
Do you look in the mirror and complain about your body, your face, your hair, your size? I want to encourage you to be contented with the body God has given you. I think of my dear friend, Fran, who was just barely five feet tall. All her life she was the shortest one. But you know, God used her size to enlarge her ministry. You see, because she was short and cute, her appearance was never threatening or intimidating to anyone. It made it easy for her to make friends—and she made friends with everybody. God used her personality and short stature to connect her with so many people, many who came to saving faith through Fran. It is not a mistake that she was a short person.
Accept the body and face and size and shape that God has given you. Accept, but don't settle. Keep that body running on all cylinders. Do everything you can to keep it healthy. Exercise as you know you should; get rid of some of those harmful eating habits. Be contented with your body, while at the same time never settling for anything less than the best it can be.
Do you remember how Jesus acquired the use of the donkey for the most important parade ever—as he entered Jerusalem on what we now call Palm Sunday? I would love to have been the proverbial “fly on the wall” to see the look on the faces of the owners of that donkey when the disciples just walked up and started to untie it. As I was re-reading that story, it dawned on me that lots of us have things tied up, too, and if we'd untie them, they'd be of service to our Lord.
Let me read that passage from Luke 19 that tells this story about the donkey:
After Jesus had said this, he went on ahead, going up to Jerusalem. As he approached Bethphage and Bethany at the hill called the Mount of Olives, he sent two of his disciples, saying to them, “Go to the village ahead of you, and as you enter it, you will find a colt tied there, which no one has ever ridden. Untie it and bring it here. If anyone asks you, ‘Why are you untying it?’ say, ‘The Lord needs it.’”
Those who were sent ahead went and found it just as he had told them. As they were untying the colt, its owners asked them, “Why are you untying the colt?” They replied, “The Lord needs it.” They brought it to Jesus, threw their cloaks on the colt and put Jesus on it. As he went along, people spread their cloaks on the road (Luke 19:28-36).
This happened just a week before the crucifixion. It’s a really interesting scene, when you think about it. Jesus chose that colt to ride in his one and only parade. He knew where it was, he knew that it had never been ridden, and he knew what the reaction of the owners of the colt would be. How could he know all this? Because he is God, and though he was fully man in his 33 years on earth, he was nonetheless fully God, and God is all-knowing.
Interesting that the disciples evidently did not question Jesus' instructions. But then, after three years with him, they should have been very certain that what Jesus told them could be totally trusted. However, it had to take a little bit of nerve to walk up to this colt and start untying it. You have to give those disciples credit for their faith and obedience in this matter.
As they were untying the colt, the owners approached them. Why there was more than one owner, I don't know, except I can guess that neither could afford the colt himself, so they formed a partnership and bought it together. Could it be that these owners were poor people without a great deal of this world's possessions? Quite possibly. I doubt that a donkey's colt was a very prestigious animal. Not what kings and wealthy people chose for transportation. But likely it was all these simple owners could afford.
I can also imagine that they were a little perturbed to see two strangers taking their prized colt—evidently a young colt, since it had never been ridden. Can you put yourselves in their shoes? I wonder if they screamed at the disciples: "Why are you untying our colt?” I wonder if they were upset? I think I would have been.
At any rate, when the disciples explained that Jesus had requested to use this colt, this one particular colt, it seems to put an end to the entire discussion. Without another question, they give the colt to the disciples for Jesus to use. I have to believe they had heard about Jesus. I'm sure most everyone in the area had by that time.
Perhaps they had heard him speak at some time; maybe they'd seen him heal someone or cast out a demon. Their willingness to let go of a valuable possession so unquestioningly leads me to believe that Jesus was someone they knew about, someone they respected, perhaps even loved.
As I read this story, I thought, "What do I have tied up that the Lord wants to use?” I think many times we've got resources and abilities that God would use in his service, but they're all tied up. We're using them for our own selfish purposes, or failing to use them at all perhaps, instead of giving them back to God for his eternal purposes
It may seem counterintuitive, but “nice” isn’t necessarily the goal of a peacemaker. Jesus was the perfect peacemaker, and he is our peace, but as you study his life on earth, you will see that as a peacemaker he was not always what we would call “nice.”
There were times he said difficult things that others did not want to hear. There were times when he actually disrupted situations that were wrong—like people selling things in the Temple. But he always was doing what was good for others. We are called to be peacemakers, which means that if you always choose what you say or do based on the idea that it has to be “nice,” you probably will avoid hard but essential conversations. You will become a peacekeeper not a peacemaker.
But being truthful does not give us a license to be harsh. Gentleness is the key word when we are trying to make peace. You remember that Jesus described himself as gentle and humble in heart. And Paul wrote to the Philippian church that they should let their gentleness be evident to all.
Gentleness is required if you want to be a peacemaker in difficult situations. After all, gentleness is a fruit of God’s Spirit and it should be always evident in our lives. It’s a trait that helps bring peace and calm even in contentious situations. It’s a clear-headed way of dealing with others that creates safe spaces to address difficult topics.
Jesus declared that he came to give us peace—his peace, not like the world gives. It’s a different kind of peace, one that keeps on keeping on even in tough places. What we as Christ-followers must do is on a daily basis, receive the peace he gives for our own lives, and then share that peace with whoever God brings across our path that day. What a testimony we could have to our worlds if we showed them the peace of Christ by the way we live, and then we followed our Lord’s directive to be peacemakers by helping to make peace where we live, where we work, with close friends and strangers.
Christ has come to give us peace; he is our peace. We need to be sure we're demonstrating it daily in our lives, and that we are peacemakers, people who bring peace to turbulent situations.
It is so important to develop peacemaking skills, because Jesus said that peacemakers are blessed.
I just want to remind you that Jesus Christ is our peace. He condescended to take on human flesh, even as a baby in a humble setting, so that he could bring peace to our troubled lives. The Apostle Paul in Ephesians wrote: But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near by the blood of Christ.
For he himself is our peace, who has made the two groups one and has destroyed the barrier, the dividing wall of hostility, by setting aside in his flesh the law with its commands and regulations. His purpose was to create in himself one new humanity out of the two, thus making peace, and in one body to reconcile both of them to God through the cross, by which he put to death their hostility. He came and preached peace to you who were far away and peace to those who were near. For through him we both have access to the Father by one Spirit (Ephesians 2:13-18). Jesus was born—to bring us peace. He came to reconcile us to God through the cross, and for those who have accepted his freely-offered redemption, we now have peace because we have Jesus, who is our peace. We who were far away, who had no peace in our lives, who were in bondage to sin, have been brought near, so near that we can enter into his throne room and have fellowship with God the Father, Son and Holy Spirit.
Remember to thank God for the Prince of Peace, Jesus Christ, and if you don’t yet know the peace he offers, you can do so by repenting of your sins and accepting his peace as your own.
We seem to be in a time when there is little peace between people. And this contentious cultural atmosphere can easily seep into our everyday lives—into our families and our workplaces, even our churches.
In Matthew 5:9 we read where Jesus said, “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.” It is a blessing to be a peacemaker; there is a special reward for those who make peace, not just keep peace. Peacemakers are proactive, confronting situations of discord to promote peace.
Well, if we’re supposed to be peacemakers, how can we make peace? Proverbs 17:9 says, “Whoever would foster love covers over an offense, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends.” One thing you can do to be a peacemaker is not to spread the bad things you hear or see. Cover up the offense, don't keep telling everybody else about someone's mistake or bad behavior. In other words, stop gossiping.
Proverbs 15:1 tells us that “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” A peacemaker is a person with gentle words. When someone starts telling you how angry they are at you or someone else, find those gentle words to turn away their wrath. If you throw in a few harsh words of your own, you add to the conflict. Often a tone of voice can make a big difference.
If you know there is strife between two people, what could you do to bring them together, let them air their grievances, and restore peace into that relationship? Don’t be afraid to make that effort; often it just takes one person to make a move and these petty differences can be resolved.
What we need in our world of strife are many peacemakers—people who are willing to make peace in the many small conflicts that surround our daily lives. Ask God to give you that skill, that kind of servant heart, so that you are the peacemaker in your world. When you do, Jesus promises that you will be blessed.
Are you a peacemaker or a peacekeeper? A peacemaker is one who strives to make peace in situations that are in turmoil. A peacekeeper, on the other hand, often just tries to keep the status quo and do anything to avoid conflict. In the Beatitudes, Jesus calls us to be peacemakers; therefore, that is what we should strive to be.
Parents know that making peace between children is a part of their job description. From their earliest days, our children manage to disrupt the peace—get into arguments, cause discord, aggravate each other. And we find ourselves in the role of peacemaker. Sometimes that role is a stern role, sometimes it is the role of negotiating, sometimes we have to separate the parties involved. In other words, being a peacemaker is not always a peaceful job! We may have to be assertive and proactive, but whatever we can do to promote peace, that is our calling as children of God.
Maybe you work in a situation where a peacemaker is needed. Some of the things that typically cause discord in the workplace are gossip, job insecurity, out-of-control ambition, poor communication—and the list goes on. It could be a company-wide morale problem, producing tumult and disharmony among employees; or it could be little feuds between individuals, where one refuses to speak to another. I’m often amazed at how petty and vindictive adults can be—but there you have it.
What can we do in these kinds of environments to be peacemakers? It’s not enough just to keep pushing it under the covers, so to speak, and trying to keep a lid on things. That is peacekeeping, just opting for peace at any price. But we want to be peacemakers.
We hear a lot about peace, don’t we? From the proclamation of the angels to the shepherds at the birth of Jesus—"Peace on earth, good will to men”—to our daily news broadcasts, peace is a frequent topic, and there’s no doubt that most people want to have peace on earth.
But you know, peace is not something that can be declared or legislated. True peace is a heart condition, and each individual has the choice to be at peace with others or not. Just think, if every individual decided to be a peaceful person, to never harm anyone else, to do everything he or she could to promote peace, well, we would have peace on earth.
Obviously, you and I have little influence on world peace. But we have great influence on our own environments, whether they are peaceful or not. So, I thought we should talk about peace in our individual worlds. How can we promote peace?
Let me begin by asking: Are you a peacemaker or a peacekeeper? There is a difference, you know. Peacemaking is something every Christian should be very good at doing. We are called to be peacemakers. Jesus said that people who make peace are blessed, and will be called "children of God.”
Peacekeepers, on the other hand, often just want peace at any price. That can lead to compromising and lowering standards and going along to get along, just to keep the peace. So, we need to know the difference between being a peacemaker and a peacekeeper.
A peacemaker is one who makes peace where there is none. I'm sure you have many opportunities to make peace if you recognize them and take advantage of them.
The challenge of setting reasonable boundaries is almost always a relationship challenge. And it frequently comes from our misplaced idea of what it means to be a good friend, or what it means to be a good team player. There’s no doubt that as Christ-followers, our standard given to us by Jesus himself is to go the extra mile, to do more than is required of us. We are called to be servants, as Jesus was, and that should always be our attitude.
But when you try to do more than you should do and you think that going the extra mile means you jump through everyone’s hoops and meet everyone’s expectations, you are then in dangerous territory. This is how you become burned out; it’s how you become an enabler; it’s how you allow false guilt to drive you into exhaustion and resentment.
I would remind you that Jesus knew how to say no. Do you remember when the disciples were looking for Jesus one morning because a crowd of people had gathered to hear Jesus again, and no doubt were eager to take advantage of his gift of healing? They found him alone, praying, and they exclaimed: “Everyone is looking for you!” Jesus replied, “Let us go somewhere else—to the nearby villages—so I can preach there also. That is why I have come” (Mark 1: 37b-38). The disciples tried to tell Jesus that he should come back and preach to the crowd waiting for him, but Jesus knew when to say no.
Another time a man stopped him and asked him to settle a disagreement. He said, “Teacher, tell my brother to divide the inheritance with me.” But Jesus said to him, “Man, who appointed me a judge or an arbiter between you?” (Luke 12:13-14). Basically Jesus said, “Sorry, that’s not my job.” He drew a boundary and said no, even though he could have done it but it was not what he was sent to do.
Jesus knew that he could not please everyone; in his human body while here on earth he had physical limitations, as we do. He became weary, as we do. He needed rest and time alone, as we do. And in order to do what God had sent him to do, he had to refuse to do other things—he had to draw boundaries. I believe his example teaches us that we must also learn to draw reasonable boundaries in order for us to be able to do what God wants us to do.
So, let’s see what other boundary issues Fran is facing now. It’s Wednesday of this week in her life, and she has just barely made a deadline for her most important client, but it was at the expense of late hours last night because she allowed a coworker to talk her into helping her for “ten minutes,” which turned into three hours. This is one of the boundary issues she faces. Fran is relieved that she got it done, but quite honestly, she is exhausted and sleepy.
With two hours to go before the end of the day, she is counting the minutes until she can leave, tying up a few loose ends, and dreaming of going to bed early when the kids do tonight. But in walks her manager, who says,
“Fran, if you’re not busy tonight, I’d love for you to join me for dinner with the Vice President of Marketing, who is in town this week, you know. I’ve been telling him about your success and how much you’ve contributed to the fact that we’re twenty percent ahead of our quota, and he asked if you would join us. I know you have your kids, but if you could get a sitter, I’d be glad to cover that expense for you.”
Don’t do it, Fran, the inner voice of God’s Spirit seems to say to her, but how can she say no? I mean, how often do you get this kind of opportunity to make a good impression? Well, she thinks I can do it. Mom will keep the kids for me, I think, and it’s just one night. So, she hears herself saying, “That’s very nice of him. I, uh, I think I can make that happen. Let me make a call and I’ll get back to you.”
She calls her mom, who does have plans for that evening, but Fran twists her arm and convinces her that her Dad will be glad to watch the kids while she’s away, so of course, Mom can’t say no either,
How can the people you work with know that Jesus Christ makes a difference in your life? I'll give you one way that will always work. If they see that you have peace in your life, regardless of the circumstances, they're going to want to know how in the world you do it. People today are desperate for peace, and as Christians we know the Prince of Peace, the only one who can give us true peace.
But if our lives are just as frayed around the edges as everyone else's, if we don't display that peace of God which passes understanding, then we're missing an incredible opportunity to show Christ to the people in our worlds.
I want to tell you the story of how a good friend found Christ: Janet, who is a member of our Board here. Before becoming a believer she was working in a situation that was highly stressful. Everyone was under constant pressure and the environment was really crazy. But in all of the chaos, she kept noticing one of her coworkers who seemed very peaceful. He did his work as well as anyone, produced what was expected of him, but he just never seemed to be frazzled and stressful like everyone else.
Janet watched him for a long time, and finally she said to him, "How do you do it?” He smiled, and shared with her that it was his faith in Christ which made the difference. Then he simply recommended that she read the Bible and suggested the book of John.
Though Janet had considered herself a Christian, she had never read the Bible, so she decided to see what he was talking about. After a couple of months of reading and investigating, Janet accepted Christ, and a few months after that, her husband Ray did, too.
And it all started when one person was peaceful in a chaotic work environment. What a testimony we could have to our worlds if we showed them in our lives that Christ is our peace, and because of him, we can have peace even when the situation is chaotic.
So, there are many reasons we need to learn the secret of having peace in the midst of pressure. Christ has come to give us peace; he is our peace. We need to be sure we're demonstrating it daily in our lives.
Knowing consistent peace in our lives, even though we have pressure and stress to deal with, should be a trademark of Christians.
Of course, Jesus is our supreme example of this ability to be peaceful regardless of the pressures. People were always crowding him, trying to talk to him, trying to touch him. He had a hard time finding any space or time for himself. He was constantly under pressure. But I notice that no matter how busy he was or how much there was to do, he found time to be alone with God. R. A. Torrey wrote something which I copied in the front of my prayer journal and to which I frequently refer. He wrote: "Some people are so busy that they find no time for prayer. Apparently the busier Christ's life was, the more he prayed. Sometimes he had no time to eat, sometimes he had no time for needed rest or sleep, but he always took time to pray; and the more the work crowded the more he prayed." Lots of times when our schedules get very full, and the pressure starts to come in on us, the first thing we sacrifice is our time with the Lord. That's one reason many Christians don't have real peace in their everyday lives. They've not spent time with the Prince of Peace, they've failed to go to the source of peace, and so they face their pressures on their own.
I remember one period of time when the pressures and deadlines were great, and so I sacrificed my prayer time for a few days. In his oh-so-gentle way, God showed me that when I sacrifice prayer time to relieve pressures, I do just the opposite: I increase my pressures. He said, "Spend time with me, draw on my strength. You need me now more than ever. And I'll take the remaining time and make it stretch to meet the responsibilities.”
Your lack of peace in the midst of pressure may be because you've sacrificed time with the Prince of Peace. Sorry, but it just won't work. Give God the time you need to be with him and see how he stretches the rest of your time for you.
Peace even when you’re under pressure: Do you think that's possible? One thing we all deal with is pressure and stress. While it's true that too much pressure is harmful, it's also true that you cannot escape some pressure if you're involved in anything at all. So, we need to know how to be peaceful even though we have stress and pressure in our daily routine.
Peter tells us in 1 Peter the third chapter that the person who intends to love life and see good days must seek peace and pursue it. You have to go for it. It doesn't just happen. It comes when you pursue it.
One thing I recommend is to take peace breaks. When you feel the pressure and panic start to crowd in around you, find some way to take a short break where you can pray for a few minutes. Get your mind refocused on Jesus. Then go back to face your situation, and you'll discover that unreasonable peace—that peace that passes understanding—flowing through you, even though the pressure is still there.
Write Scripture verses on cards that help you to be peaceful. Such as Isaiah 26:3: “You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you.” Put that card in front of you, on your screen saver or smart phone, and read it and re-read it several times during the day. That will help keep your thoughts where they should be; bringing every thought into captivity so that they obey Christ.
You could hum a good Christian song to yourself to get your mind refocused on the person who is our peace, Jesus Christ. You can do that while you're talking to people, busily working on something, rushing on the job, darting somewhere in your car. Right in the midst of all that pressure, you can still know God's incredible peace.
Do you spend any time with God early in your day, so that you begin your day in a peaceful manner? Or do you begin most of your days in a hectic rush, getting up late, rushing yourself and your family? Remember this: Your day is won or lost in the morning hours. Take time early in your day to put on peace, and your peace is a person, right? Put on Jesus and his shoes of peace. Don’t leave home without doing that. And take some peace breaks during your hectic day. Those are good suggestions for staying peaceful in the midst of pressure.
Did you ever think about this: if you don't feel pressured, you aren't? Pressure is a state of mind. If you don't think you're under pressure, you're really not, regardless of what's on your plate to do.
One of the most important concepts we can grasp in our Christian life is that we are what we think. Everything begins with our thought life, and that includes whether or not we're feeling pressured. I start to feel stressed when I allow myself to think about all there is to do, when I start to worry about next week's deadlines, when I ponder long the "To Do" list that stares me in the face. "Oh, my, how will I ever get all this done?" I think. Then I convince myself that there's no way. And now the panic starts to rise, because I'm thinking about all I have to do instead of just doing something.
Remind yourself often that you can only do one thing at a time, decide what has the highest priority at this moment, and do it. Allowing those thoughts to hang around and bombard you with "Hurry up, you've got a lot to do," or "You're never going to get everything done at this rate," just pours the pressure on yourself, and keeps you from working at maximum efficiency.
The good news is that pressure and peace are not exclusives. You don't have to give up peace and calmness just because there's some pressure on you. And peace is not passivity. Peace doesn't mean you're lying down in green pastures, with bubbling brooks and birds singing. Peace doesn't mean the absence of emails or meals to cook or reports to finish. Peace is a state of mind; it begins with our thoughts. And our minds can be at rest in the midst of incredible activity.
One good suggestion to stay peaceful in pressurized environments is to talk to yourself correctly. What do you say or think when you're under pressure? "Oh, I'll never get this done.” Or "I can't do all this.” Well, why do you feed all that negative stuff into your head? Say instead, "Lord, by your grace I will survive this. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” You will be amazed at how much easier it is to handle stress when you talk to yourself in biblical ways, not in negative ways.
One of the most common problems we all share today is handling pressure and stress. I don't know anyone who escapes it, do you? How do you have peace in the midst of your stress and pressures?
Now, I'm not going to tell you that you shouldn't have pressure or stress in your life. Honestly, if you constantly lived free of pressure, you probably would not accomplish very much. Any time you start to get involved in anything, any time you decide to contribute something, any time you take on responsibilities, pressure and stress become a part of the scene.
Pressure forces me to be organized and to prioritize my time much better. And then, I really believe God uses pressure in our lives to teach us many things. Pressure teaches us to turn to him. Pressure makes us look up more often. Pressure keeps us aware of our need for him.
Of course, there is such a thing as too much pressure, and we certainly need to be careful about that. God reminds me frequently that I can't do everything, and there is a limit to the amount of pressure I should handle. One of the major reasons we are under pressure and stress is because we haven't learned to say no, and we're trying to be superwomen or supermen.
You know, just because you can do something doesn't necessarily mean you should. Just because there is something else to be done doesn't necessarily mean you are the one who should do it, or it has to be done right now. Many of us try to be all things to all people, and it never works.
Honestly, I have to admit that sometimes I put myself under pressure because I want the praise of people. I’m doing it for the wrong reasons. Remember this: You'll never get enough applause from people to make you feel significant. Our self-worth must come from our relationship with Jesus Christ.
If your superwoman's wings are tired today, just stop and remember that God is not asking you to be a super-person. Perhaps that is why you're feeling pressured and stressed. Let go of that superwoman pursuit and ask God to show you his plan for you and for your day.
As we look at Fran’s struggle with establishing appropriate boundaries for her life, part of the problem is that she has the somewhat misplaced conception that as a Christ-follower, she should try to do what anyone asks of her. After all, she thinks, isn’t that what Jesus meant when he told us in the Sermon on the Mount that we should go the extra mile? Well, no it isn’t. One mile, yes, but not unending extra miles.
Fran faces various people in her life who are pushing her boundaries. They are each different, but they represent the various ways that boundaries can become a real issue. The first one deals with a friend who continually exceeds normal and acceptable boundaries when it comes to requiring a lot of Fran’s time.
It’s Sunday afternoon and Fran has planned to spend a quiet day at home with her two children, just enjoying an afternoon to play games with Drew and Alice, and maybe even do some good reading, one of her favorite pastimes that she doesn’t get to do very often. Just as she is in the midst of a game of Crazy 8, having fun with her kids, the phone rings and Jane is on the other end.
Jane is a friend from church who calls Fran quite often and talks for long periods of time about all her issues. You might say she is a high-maintenance friend, but Fran has tried to listen and help her, thinking that this is the right thing to do. Admittedly it has become a bit out-of-balance and as Fran sees Jane’s caller ID, she is really tempted to just let it go—but she’s supposed to be there for her friends, right? So, she answers and sure enough Jane begins her typical long and detailed complaining and whining. Jane is the type who tells you how to build a clock when all you want to know is what time it is.
At first, Fran tries to encourage her and offer some suggestions, but everything she says is resisted by Jane, and it seems Fran can do nothing but listen. Whatever advice Fran may have is immediately discounted by Jane. “That wouldn’t work” is her familiar retort, or “You just don’t understand” is another.
After twenty minutes, Drew says, “Mom, aren’t we gonna finish our game?” No doubt Jane heard Drew, but she completely ignores it and continues her tirade. After another ten minutes and several pleas from Drew and Alice, Fran realizes that Jane is not going to stop anytime soon, so when Jane takes a breath, she says, “Hey, Jane, the kids and I were playing a game and I promised them we’d finish, so if you don’t mind, I need to get back to them. I’ll be praying for you. In fact, why don’t I pray for you now before we hang up?”
Jane says, “Well, I know you’re always busy and don’t have time to talk—I guess games are more important to you than friends.” And with that she hangs up, totally ignoring Fran’s offer to pray.
“Wow,” Fran says to herself, “I guess I should have let her keep talking—but honestly, it doesn’t do any good to listen to her. She simply isn’t interested in solutions or advice; all she wants is to bend my ear and get my sympathy. I don’t know, Lord, what am I supposed to do?”
Was Fran right to finally bring this conversation to a close? She feels a bit guilty, but then she feels guilty about her commitment to the kids as well. If it were a one-time event, the answer might be different. But Jane has been doing this to Fran for several weeks, but this is the first time Fran has assertively brought a conversation to the close, which obviously has not set well with Jane. Did she have a better option?
Have you got some “Janes” in your life—people who continually bend your ear and take up your time, but nothing good ever seems to come from it? Maybe it’s time to do something about it. Perhaps instead of putting up with Jane’s time-consuming litany of complaints, Fran needs to consider what she might do to help Jane, while at the same time setting some boundaries for these frequent one-sided conversations. It’s obvious that they aren’t accomplishing anything good for either woman.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
What do you do when life gets hard? When your faith gets tested, how do you respond? Do trials in life incline you to distance yourself from God or do life’s tough moments compel you to lean into Jesus? Trials of life will come. At some level we know this, so why do we get so stunned when trials happen? Jesus told his disciples, “In this world you will have trouble” (John 16:63), and we will too.
If you have been a follower of Jesus for any amount of time you are probably familiar with James’ instruction on life’s trials: “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything” (James 1:2-4).
James is a book about practical Christian living; a life that reflects a genuine faith by being not only hearers of the Word but doers. (James 1:22). If we are honest, sometimes we like to read and hear the Word of God but actively living out God’s instruction, that’s another story. Especially when the rubber hits the road and hardships come. One of the most difficult parts of the Christian life is the fact that becoming a disciple of Christ does not make us immune to life’s trials and tribulations.
Considering it pure joy when you face trials is counterintuitive. Joy is not typically our first reaction to difficulties and challenges. No one likes to suffer, yet as a follower of Jesus, in your suffering, there’s a unique opportunity for God to perfect and complete the valuable character-building work he started in you. God uses difficulties, trials, and persecution to test, strengthen, and grow your faith.
Our faith can get lazy and flabby when times are easy. While I don’t want flabby faith, I sometimes don't want to go through the refining fire that's required to purify and sanctify. But, trials are an opportunity for your faith to work – and get a workout. Just like lifting increased weight builds and strengthens your muscles, the heaviness of hard times can build and strengthen your faith when you rely on and trust Jesus.
When James says to “count it all joy,” he encourages us to evaluate the way we look at trials; to develop a new mindset and attitude that considers trials from God’s perspective. Trials test your faith. And when you persevere, grounded in faith in Christ, believing (even when it does not feel like it) that he is with you and working all things for your good, it will be a faith builder.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Do you believe that God will show up in your life every day, no matter what? When you think about the character of God, what comes to mind? Perhaps you think merciful, gracious, loving, holy, forgiving. What about faithful? Do you believe that God’s faithfulness to you is unconditional, that he can be relied on even when you are unreliable?
The Apostle Paul reminds us of the nature of God. “If we are faithless, he remains faithful, for he cannot disown himself” (2 Timothy 2:13). Just stop for a moment and let the magnitude of these words sink into your mind and heart. No matter what you do, God will be faithful to you. As you think about this verse, there are two simple truths that I want you to see and let seep in deep.
Faithful is who God is. Faithful is not something that God does or just displays toward you. Even if he wanted to (and he doesn’t), he cannot stop being faithful to you because that is part of his nature. And his nature is unchanging. As Paul said, for God not to be faithful, he would have to disown himself and we know he will never do that.
God’s faithfulness is unconditional. God is not faithful based on some long list of conditions you are required to meet. God’s decision to be faithful to you has absolutely nothing to do with you, which is a good thing because most of us have a faulty track record.
Because of the sacrifice of Jesus Christ on the cross, even when you are unfaithful to God, even when you sin, God will remain true to you. Regardless of how you act, you cannot do anything to make him love you less. Even when you are faithless, he remains faithful. This is mind blowing and true. There is no other God like Jesus Christ who displays such loyalty and steadfast love for you.
Psalm 36:5 declares this truth, “Your love, Lord, reaches to the heavens, your faithfulness to the skies.” And Deuteronomy 7:9 beckons, “Know therefore that the Lord your God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love him and keep his commandments.”
As you love and follow Jesus, albeit imperfectly, God remains loyal to you. This is reason to give God glory, and honor, and praise. Lord, we thank you for your unending love. Thank you that you are faithful even when we are not. Turn our hearts to you, stir our affections for you. Help us to receive your abundant love and respond with gratitude, living lives holy and pleasing to you.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Have you ever felt hurt by the words of a good friend? Several years ago a friend gave me some feedback that was really hard to hear. While she didn’t intend her words to be mean, they pierced me. I knew that her intention was not to harm me but to point something out that was a blind spot in my behavior. Even though she spoke those truths out of and in love, her words still stung.
Have you ever had a friend speak painful and plain words that cut? Proverbs 27:6 Amplified version says, “Faithful are the wounds of a friend [who corrects out of love and concern], But the kisses of an enemy are deceitful [because they serve his hidden agenda].”
What these words of wisdom teach us is that a mark of a true friend is the willingness to wound us with words of loving correction. The correction may not feel good at the time (it rarely does) but its purpose is to help us grow and mature us spiritually. Two key words in this verse are “faithful” and “friend.” Both descriptors clarifying that the person is pointing something out stemming from their love for you, commitment to your friendship and investment in your spiritual transformation. The ability to be open and honest with each other, coming from a spirit of love, faithfulness, and integrity, designed for the good of the other person is the mark of a true and deepening friendship. With that intention a friend’s “wounds” should be kindly and gratefully received.
It feels counterintuitive to invite correction in our lives. After all, the culture around us has grown more and more resistant to any type of correction. People do what is right in their own minds and if anyone dares to say anything that may appear critical, it is easily dismissed. But as a follower of Jesus it is important for you to invite faithful and biblical correction in your life. How do you react when someone points out a part of you that needs growth and transformation?
Are you the type of person who is open to receiving feedback from friends that while feeling hurtful may be helpful? It can be easy to feel defensive when your shortcomings are exposed but you simply cannot grow if you recoil from correction. The kisses of an enemy are deceitful. You really don’t want flattery from someone who does not have your best interests in mind. Your aim as a follower of Jesus is to grow in his likeness. And as the Apostle Paul reminds us in Ephesians 4:15 “...speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ.”
Who can you invite to speak truth into your life? Nobody’s perfect. Be humble, invite faithful words that wound and be grateful for the greater goal of maturing as someone who loves and follows Jesus.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
If someone were to look into your life, how would they know that you are a follower of Jesus? Is your Christian faith just a label or is it truly a lifestyle? Do your faith-filled actions speak louder than your words?
There are a lot of people who say they are Christians but their lives are void of proof and one source of evidence for your faith is kind acts, your good deeds towards others.
James 2:14-17 says, “What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save them? Suppose a brother or a sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to them, “Go in peace; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about their physical needs, what good is it? In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.”
James is not saying that you earn your salvation through your good deeds. True faith in Jesus as Lord and Savior alone is what saves you. But rather, your goods deeds will demonstrate the authenticity of your faith. Faith takes action and how you live reveals what you believe. Faith is the root, good works are the result, the holy fruit of a faithful life.
First Peter 2:12 reinforces this truth: “Live such good lives among the pagans that, though they accuse you of doing wrong, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day he visits us.” As a follower of Jesus we intentionally act and live in a manner worthy of the gospel and we look for ways to serve others and bless them.
How has your faith prompted you to meet the needs of those around you? How has your allegiance to Christ changed how you interact with and love your neighbor? Do you tend to think of yourself first or are you willing to sacrifice your comfort to share with others? Are you only inclined to do good for others when you can benefit? Ask God for opportunities to live out your faith and to continue to produce good works in and through you as evidence of your belief and hope in him.
Living a faith-filled life can be hard. As followers of Jesus we need other Christ-followers in our lives. Hebrews 10:24-25 says, “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.” If you do not have Christian community, can I encourage you to find a Bible preaching church near you? You were not meant to walk this journey of faith alone. Get involved in your local church, join a small group, participate in a Bible study.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
As you think about the measure of your faith these days, how’s your faith sight? A few years ago I had my annual eye exam and while I had held onto my 20/20 vision for 40+ years, the time had come when my ability to see clearly was not as sharp as it once was. When doing my daily Scripture reading or trying to peruse a menu at a restaurant it was becoming evident that I could not see as clearly as I had in the past. My vision was becoming blurred, my eyesight was weakening.
The same thing can happen to our faith over time. If we are not mindful, life’s disruptions, disappointments, detours, and delays can cause our faith to weaken. So how is your faith sight? Are you seeing God for who he really is--faithful and trustworthy even when you cannot see? Or are you in a season where you are finding it difficult to trust God?
In the book of Genesis we read of the covenant that God made with Abraham to become the father of many nations promising him descendants and multitudes of generations to come. But from a human perspective there was one perplexing problem. Abraham was 99 and his wife Sarah was not only unable to bear children, she was also 90 years old. Yet, God would do what only he could do, the impossible. And keeping his promise, Sarah would bear a son and Abraham’s descendants would in fact become as numerous as the stars in the sky.
Romans 4:18-21 says, “Against all hope, Abraham in hope believed and so became the father of many nations, just as it had been said to him, ‘So shall your offspring be.’ Without weakening in his faith, he faced the fact that his body was as good as dead—since he was about a hundred years old—and that Sarah’s womb was also dead. Yet he did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised.”
He did not waver through unbelief. Instead he was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God! In the face of what was humanly impossible, Abraham believed anyway, deciding to live not on the basis of what he saw but what God said.
What situation are you facing right now that seems insurmountable? What circumstance is God calling you to look through the lens of faith? When you put on your faith glasses you will see with a renewed perspective that is altered by your trust in God and your view will change.
Presented by Lisa Bishop
Whether you have been a follower of Jesus for two months or 20-plus years, we all have something in common. At some point or dare I say several times in your Christian walk, you will doubt the faithfulness of God. You will struggle to trust him. That’s the honest truth. And frankly, I think we need to talk about that more and normalize it in our Christian circles. All throughout God’s Word we see examples and stories of people doubting if God is trustworthy. We see the Psalmists and some of the greatest heroes of the faith struggling to believe at times.
Yet even though we see evidence throughout Scripture of wavering faith (let’s not forget about Doubting Thomas), I think we are so afraid of being shamed or condemned for questioning that we sit in our disillusion, silently suffering. We think something is wrong with us. Something is wrong with our faith. “Why does it look like everyone else’s life is so good, that God is faithful to others, but I don’t feel like he cares about me?” If you have ever heard yourself thinking that or even saying it out loud, you are not the only one. I have as well. So, it’s not a matter of if you will wonder if God is really trustworthy, if he is faithful, you will. What matters is your response….what you do, in those moments or seasons when you doubt the faithfulness of God.
The other day I was doing my morning quiet time, which is a time of stillness before the Lord, journaling, praying, and reading Scripture. When I journal, I typically start out by reflecting on the prior day by writing down my daily gratitude list and telling God what I am thankful for. This has become a daily habit; expressing appreciation for anything from a cool breeze and sunny day to time with my mom, a new work project, a divine encounter with a person God brings in my path, dinner with friends, patience to endure a frustrating situation with grace. There is a lot to be grateful for when you sit down and intentionally take the time to consider all of the ways God is present and providing. On this particular day, my journaling started differently. Instead of starting with my gratitude list, my pen uttered honest words that my heart was speaking that morning. I journaled, “Today I woke up with a fear of the future. But I will choose to trust.”
That morning I found myself a bit bewildered and uncertain about the future. As I was reflecting on my life and current circumstances, I found myself wondering, “Is this it?” I went on to write, “I desire to be in the flow of my calling and giftedness, Lord. Am I missing it?” And then the words, “What if” spilled onto the pages.
What if? Have you ever found yourself asking that question? What if I had made a different decision, taken another path, acted on that prompting, not taken that job, taken that job, gotten that degree, married that person, not married that person, said yes to…., said no to ……. What would life have been like if only I had…… (fill in the blank).
Trying to play out the “what could have been” in life reminds me of the movie Sliding Doors. The movie tells the story of a London woman whose life and career both hinge, unknown to her, on whether or not she catches a train. The main character, Helen Quilley gets fired from her job as a public relations executive. As she leaves the office building, she drops an earring in the lift, and a man picks it up for her. This minor delay has her rushing for her train on the London Underground, but she misses it as the train doors are closed. But the film then rewinds, and the scene is replayed except that now she manages to board the train. The film continues, alternating between the two storylines in which different events ensue. In one story we see how her life plays out when she gets on the train. In the second scenario, we see how her life unfolds and what happens when she misses the train. In essence, her future, the trajectory of her life,
Undoubtedly many of you, like me, enjoy sports. That's a common practice for us Americans. Well, if you watch sports competition very often, you're familiar with the term "playing hurt.” Many times in these games a key player will be injured in some way, and you'll see them slowly pull themselves up off the ground or the floor. You know they're hurting, but so often they stay in the game. I think we can learn something from these athletes.
When a player continues to play even though he or she is hurt, you know you're watching a real pro, someone truly committed to their game. That person is willing to sacrifice herself or himself for the good of the team.
Well, there are times in our lives that we must play hurt. What do you want to do when you've been hurt? Suppose someone has trampled on your feelings or been very cruel to you. It makes you want to go to the sidelines and lick your wounds, doesn't it? It throws you into a pity-party, and your first reaction is to walk out of the game and say, "Forget it. Who needs this!"
But a true servant of Jesus Christ many times has to play hurt. Jesus is looking for people with perseverance; people who play in spite of the pain; people who stay in the game even though they might want to go sit on the bench for awhile.
Paul wrote to Timothy that he must Endure hardship with us like a good soldier of Christ Jesus (2 Timothy 2:3). In Hebrews 12 we see that hardship produces discipline in our lives, and Paul wrote to the Corinthians that he delighted in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions and difficulties for "when I am weak, then I am strong" (2 Corinthians 12:10b).
Are you hurt ? Well, are you going to go sit on the sidelines and lick your wounds, or will you choose to endure hardship as a good soldier would? Ask God to give you the grace and strength to play hurt.
I wonder if you give up too easily? Do you keep wishing for the easy way out of whatever you’re facing? It's likely you, like me, could use a lesson or two in how to persevere. Lots of people make good starts; not too many complete the course.
We read in Hebrews 12:1 that we should run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Note that each of us has a unique race marked out. Your race may be different from mine, but the important thing for both of us is to hang in there and cross the finish line.
The night is darkest just before the dawn, and all too often we quit the race when it gets dark and bleak, when the finish line is just around the corner. In the first chapter of James we read that "perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything” (James 1:4). Without perseverance we won't reach spiritual maturity. That's why we need to learn perseverance.
How often do you feel like quitting? Hebrews 12:13 says "Don't wander away from the path but forge steadily onward. On the right path the limping foot recovers strength and does not collapse” (Phillips Translation). Therefore, we need to make certain we're on the right path, and then stay on it regardless. Even if you're just limping along, don't stop. As we hang in there, our limps are healed and we're able to cross the finish line.
Paul wrote to the Corinthians, "Now it is required that those who have been given a trust must prove faithful” (1 Corinthians 4:2). Proving faithful is perseverance, and we can learn to be faithful and to persevere. I'll take a faithful person any day over one with bigger talents or gifts who isn't willing to hang in and get the job done—to stick with it through thick and thin times.
Does it seem like your spiritual walk could be better described as a limp? If you're like me, there are times when it seems you're struggling with the same things all the time.
Are you limping along—spiritually speaking? Does it seem like God is far away, and prayer is unrewarding and dead? When you read the Bible, do you find your mind wandering, as the words run together on the page? Does it seem like a dry history book rather than a live letter to you from the Lord? Has your desire to be involved in ministry grown cold, and instead those avenues of service are more like a duty now than a joy?
Well, you've got a spiritual limp. We all get them, and we need to be prepared to deal with them. Most of us want to leave the race when we start limping, don't we? We figure we just can't keep going, so we give up and sit on the sidelines or start down another path which looks a little easier. But that's not how we should deal with a spiritual limp.
I noticed a passage in Hebrews 12 which encouraged me as I thought about my occasional spiritual limps. Verses 12 and 13 tell us "So tighten your loosening grip and steady your wavering stand. Don't wander away from the path but forge steadily onward. On the right path the limping foot recovers strength and does not collapse..." (Phillips Translation).
Tightening your grip and steadying your stand and staying on the right path require discipline. Discipline without feelings or emotions. Discipline without visible results. The first verse of that 12th chapter of Hebrews tells us we must run with endurance the race marked out for us. Even run the race with a limp, but whatever you do, you are not to sit down, get sidelined or sidetracked.
Let me encourage you to keep running in the right race, even though you're limping along. Just like professional athletes, sometimes we have to "play hurt," keep on keepin' on even though we're not feeling one hundred percent. Remember that the limping foot is healed by tightening your grip and steadying your stand, not by getting out of the race.
I have a tendency to talk to myself. Do you do that, too? Well, I was just noticing that the Psalmist did it a lot. As a matter of fact, I think all of us need to learn to talk to ourselves more.
As I read Psalm 42 and 43, I noticed how this phrase was often repeated: "Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.” Evidently the writer was struggling with depression, with discouragement, with the blahs, just like you and I struggle from time to time. And he talked to himself as a way to speak the right words into his mind and turn around his wrong thinking.
In verse 6 of Psalm 42, we read, "My soul is downcast within me; therefore I will remember you...” Now this is a very good technique and habit for all of us to learn. When we feel down, we should force ourselves to remember and recite out loud God's goodness to us in times past.
Are you having a tough time? Then, stop right now and talk to yourself; find some place where you can say something like, "Look, what is your problem? God loves you and cares for you; he's met your need time and again. Remember what he did for you in times past and put your hope in him again.”
I noticed in Psalm 42 and 43 that the writer also verbalized his doubts. "Why have you forgotten me. Why have you rejected me?” He voiced those doubts and questions to God, but immediately he came back to the truth of praising God and hoping in God.
When I find myself doubting and questioning God, I try to voice those to him out loud. "Lord, I feel as though you're not there. I just can't understand why this has happened. I can't help but wonder if you've forgotten about me here. BUT I know better Lord. I remember what you've done in the past, and I know your ways are not my ways. THEREFORE, I trust you, I place my hope in you. You are my Savior and my God."
So, talk to yourself. I believe it's a Scriptural principle we need to incorporate into our lives to help us find victory in those everyday ups and downs of life.
Do you ever go to God for help in a faithless panic? I certainly can remember doing that at times when I've been at the end of my own rope, and in panic rather than in faith, I've run to God for help.
Recently I was comparing two stories in Matthew 8. The first is the story of the Centurion who asked Jesus to heal his servant. You remember that the Centurion insisted that Jesus could heal his servant simply by speaking a word, he didn't need to come to his house. The Centurion had faith to believe that Jesus had the power to simply speak healing to his servant who was miles away. When Jesus heard this, he said, "I have not found anyone in Israel with such great faith" (Matthew 8:10).
You see, this Centurion was not an Israelite, yet he believed in Jesus. And Jesus commends him for his faith, and heals his servant as requested.
A short time later, the disciples come to Jesus in a panic. Jesus was asleep in the boat, and a squall comes up quickly which threatens to overturn the boat and drown them all. They come in great fear, begging Jesus to do something if he can. And Jesus says to them "You of little faith. Why are you so afraid?" (Matthew 8:26).
Interesting that the Centurion was commended for his faith and the disciples are confronted for their lack of faith. Both needed help. Both sought help from Jesus. Jesus responded to both requests. But one was a request of faith, and one was a faithless cry of panic.
The Centurion expected Jesus to heal his servant, even long distance. The disciples were amazed that Jesus could calm the storm. The Centurion only knew Jesus from afar by reputation. The disciples had spent much time with him. Yet, the Centurion showed great faith. He came with his need, but he brought expectation along with the need. The disciples came with their need but they thought this storm was too much for Jesus. They really didn't expect him to do what he did.
How about you and me? Jesus invites us to come with our needs, but he loves to see faith along with it. The next time you're in a panic situation and you need Jesus' deliverance, come with faith believing that he will hear and answer. He loves to see us come to him by faith. It pleases him to see that we have faith in him. In fact, without faith, it's impossible to please him.
Holding on, hanging in there, being patient, sitting in the waiting room—none of those come easy for me. And being put on hold on the telephone is particularly annoying—don’t you agree? So, more than anything else I’m talking to me, and you can listen in, as I remind myself again that I have to hold on when I’m on hold.
When you think of someone in the Bible who was on hold, you most likely think of Job. Talk about holding on when he was on hold, nobody has ever endured more than Job did while waiting for God to move. In Job 6 he says:
Oh, that I might have my request, that God would grant what I hope for. What strength do I have, that I should still hope? What prospects, that I should be patient? Do I have the strength of stone? Is my flesh bronze? (Job 6: 8, 11-12).
And in Job 7:6-7, he goes on to say:
My days are swifter than a weaver’s shuttle, and they come to an end without hope. Remember, O God, that my life is but a breath; my eyes will never see happiness again.
His words may express your heart today. Like Job, you may be saying or thinking: Why hasn’t God granted my request? I don’t have the strength to keep holding on. After all, I’m just flesh! I’ve lost hope and I’ll never be happy again.
For most of us, this feeling of hopelessness doesn’t show itself outwardly so much as it corrupts us on the inside. It takes the form of what Thoreau called “quiet desperation.” You keep going, you keep saying the right things and maintaining a semblance of normalcy, but on the inside you’ve truly given up. You’re going through the motions of a marriage or a job; you’re making people think everything’s okay with your children or parents, but in reality, you’re emotionally detached; there’s no more fight left in you, and you’re almost at the place where you really don’t care.
Today I want to share three simple truths that will help you hold on when you’re on hold. And the first one is: Trust in God’s Sovereignty. That simply means that you continue to believe that nothing happens in God’s universe that is outside of God’s influence and authority. And you believe the same is true in your life. God is sovereign in your life. Therefore, you can trust that in his sovereignty, he will make all things work together for your good, even the evil and wrongs of others and the cruelty of this sin-infested world.
Believe me, I know it’s not easy to trust when you’re on hold, especially when it looks like your world is crumbling around you. I think of a friend who went through years of pain and suffering from an unfaithful husband and a broken marriage, death of two children, another child who walked away from God, and other significant losses. Honestly, she was a Job-story for today, and I often wondered how she made it through. Obviously, all those things left deep scars and hurt, but she turned it into opportunity for her to minister to others. She completed a biblical counseling degree and now she has a voice to help others who are “on hold” because she has walked deep, dark roads. In God’s sovereignty and as only God can do, he turned her sorrow into dancing and has given her a broader, more effective ministry as a result.
So, if you can put your trust in God’s sovereignty today, regardless of your feelings, and simply repeat that you believe he is still in control, that is step one in holding on while you’re on hold.
Step two is to Trust in God’s Timing. Listen to these verses from Psalm 37:5-7:
Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn, your vindication like the noonday sun. Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes.
God’s timing often seems so inappropriate to us. What possible good can come from waiting any longer—that’s how we see it. I can look back on my life and see how the waiting periods of my life were there for a pu...
How well do you know God? Knowing God doesn't just happen. You don't automatically inhale that knowledge because you were born in a Christian home or go to church regularly. Knowing God is a result of seeking him and devoting yourself to knowing him more and more all the time. Many Christians never get over their fear of trusting God. They go through life unwilling to yield to him the control of their lives, because they're not quite certain he is trustworthy.
We only overcome that fear by getting to know God because you trust who you know. And you don't get to know God by accident. It happens on purpose. You must purpose to get to know him.
We've seen reports of tests given to high school seniors that show their knowledge of basic facts to be extremely poor. I wonder what kind of scores Christians would have if they were tested on their knowledge of God. Do you spend more time getting to know television programs or personalities than you do getting to know God? Could you tell me more about your local sports teams than you can tell you about God?
Getting to know God takes time and it takes a plan. Are you really eager to know him? Jesus said, "This is eternal life, that you may know God” (John 17:3). Everything hinges on your knowledge of God.
If you really want to know him, I urge you to make a structured plan that gets you into his Word on a daily basis, and that leads you into a prayer life of praise and intercession. You get to know someone by spending time with that person and it will require a commitment on your part. If you feel you don't know how to begin, I have written a Bible study entitled "A Guide on Getting to Know God.” It gives you some practical suggestions on how to do that.
But the important thing is that you pursue God. You go after him. Just going to church on Sundays is not enough, no matter how good your church is. You must personally hunger to know him and pursue him, as a deer pants after water.
When you do, I promise you this: You'll start to trust him, and you'll trust him more and more all the time. Because to truly know God is to trust him. And once you start to give him the controls of your life, everything will fall into its rightful place. You'll find the answers you've been looking for. The fear of trusting God will vanish.
If we truly believe God is who he says he is, the only true God with all power, wisdom and authority, and we believe that he cares for us individually and desires only the best for us, then the only logical conclusion has to be that he is totally trustworthy.
Why is it that you can't easily let go and trust God? Well, you have three enemies, the world, the flesh and the devil, and you are getting all kinds of conflicting signals from them. The world tells you to "do our own thing," "find yourself,” "do what feels good," "decide what your truth is!” The flesh says, "You deserve happiness and you have a right to run your life the way you want to.” The devil says, "If you trust God, you most surely will be left to some terrible life. You'll be miserable and alone.”
And if you listen to these voices, then fear takes over, and you're convinced that totally trusting God is too risky. It is meant only for those few people who somehow have the courage to go into "full time Christian service.” And without realizing it, you have decided that you can trust yourself better than God.
If that’s true, then that fear of trusting God is robbing you of peace and contentment and keeping you from the joyful, fulfilled life that you long for. Overcoming the fear of trusting God begins with a recognition of who God is, with a true understanding that he is much smarter than you are, that he cares about you and loves you and desires to give you good gifts. And that leads you to understand that the only sensible thing to do is to abandon yourself to his care and trust him completely in every area of your life.
God does not negotiate with us. We come his way—through Jesus Christ—or we don't come at all. But once you really comprehend how totally trustworthy God is, you will be glad to yield to his lordship. It takes the monkey off your back. You are no longer responsible for managing your own destiny. Someone far more qualified is now in charge—the God of all ages—and you can be absolutely sure that his plan for your life will be better than your own.
Do you believe that the God we Christians worship, the God of the Bible, is the only true God, that he has all power and authority, that he has all wisdom and knowledge, that he is holy and perfect and does not make mistakes? Certainly this is what the Bible tells us, but what I'm asking you is, do you truly believe God is like that?
It may be that you have given intellectual consent to the Bible's teaching about God, but that belief has never become a gripping reality in your everyday life.
If you are convinced that God's character, power and personality are as stated, the next important issue to understand is how this God feels about you. After all, you are but a spec in this great mass of humanity. Do you make any difference to God?
Let me remind you of a few Scriptures that tell us how God feels about you individually. Matthew 10:30 tells us “And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered.” Every time you brush your hair and see the hairs in your brush or on the floor, you should be reminded that God has just recomputed all those lost hairs, and he's keeping a running total at all times! Who else would care how many hairs are on your head? We read that he cares about worthless, colorless sparrows and knows each one that falls to the ground. Can you not believe God cares even much more about you?
We read in Zephaniah 3:17: “The Lord your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves. He will take great delight in you; in his love he will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing.” Did you know that God delights in you and sings over you? Isn't that incredible?
There are many passages in the Bible that tell us clearly that the God of all the universe cares about each of us individually, knows us intimately, and wants for us only his highest and best. His plans for you are good plans.
Now, if you're with me this far—if you believe that God has all power, wisdom, knowledge and authority, and in addition, he loves you and cares about your good—here's the next logical conclusion that those beliefs lead to: God’s plans for you are always superior to any other plans.
You can trust him and his plans for your life without any hesitation. Not only can you trust him, but it is the only logical thing to do. Why would you want to trust anyone less—even yourself? If your trust is in anyone besides God, you're settling for so much less than you should.
If you're afraid to trust God, then something must be wrong in either your understanding of who God is or how he feels about you. Or else your belief is just a head belief, and it hasn’t yet changed your heart.
Do you find it difficult to truly trust God with all aspects of your life? I believe this fear of trusting God is very real with many Christians. It was with me for ten years, as I refused to allow the Lord to control my life, because I was afraid he would punish me for past failures, or else take my life in a direction that would be miserable and would make me unhappy.
I've discovered in the many years since how foolish I was to fail to trust God, and I've begun to understand that I didn't trust him because I didn't clearly understand the nature of God. You see, when you have a clear understanding of who God is as Scripture tells us, you really have two simple options: to believe it or not to believe it. If you believe God is who he says he is, trusting him becomes the only logical thing to do. Nothing else makes any sense. To fail to trust him is to say by your actions that God cannot be who he says he is; it is in effect to say that he is not trustworthy.
What are these basic characteristics of God that should lead us to trust him? We learn from Scripture that our God is the only God. In the book of Isaiah, the Lord says, "I am the first and the last, and there is no other God besides me (Isaiah 45:5) Is there any God besides me, or is there any other Rock? I know of none” (Isaiah 44:8). So first, we understand that we are worshipping the true and only God.
Secondly, we need to understand his power. He is the Creator of all that ever existed. He said, "I am the Lord, the Maker of all things, who stretches out the heavens, who spreads out the earth by myself (Isaiah 44:24). God spoke and the worlds came into being, created out of nothing.
The Psalmist said, "I know that the Lord is great, that our Lord is greater than all gods. The Lord does whatever pleases him, in the heavens and on the earth, in the seas and all their depths” (Psalms 135:5-6).
Thirdly, our God is holy and perfect. He does not make mistakes.
Now, can you honestly say that you believe the God you worship is the only God, the Creator, all-powerful and wise, holy and perfect, and that he makes no mistakes? Please don't glibly answer that question. Give it some thought, because if you say that you do indeed believe God is who he says he is, it leads to some inevitable conclusions and decisions you must make.
What do you think is the underlying predominant reason that so many Christians today are not living victorious lives, are not effective for Jesus Christ? Why are so many consumed with fear and anxiety, with doubt and despair? Think about it for a minute.
As I look back over my life, and observe many others, I've come to this conclusion: The basic problem many of us Christians have is that we're afraid to trust God. Oh, true, we've accepted Christ and his salvation, but to trust God with every aspect of our lives strikes fear in our hearts. And because of this, we never know the triumphant joy-filled life God has intended for us.
For ten years in my own life, I fought the Lordship of Jesus Christ, ran my own show, and wasted precious opportunities for God because I was consumed by this fear of trusting God. Oh, I didn't recognize it at the time, but later I realized that underneath my rebellion against God's control in my life was a basic fear that I couldn't trust him.
Could that be where you are right now: Scared to death to really, totally trust God? Are you hanging on to the controls of your life as if to say that you think you can engineer the circumstances and events of your life better than God can?
What I finally had to face was that my fear of trusting God was a result of my misconceptions of God's character and nature and of his intentions and motivation. I was operating under the fear that God would punish me for past failures by depriving me of future happiness, and I was afraid he would direct me in paths that I did not want to take!
I've also come to understand that fear of trusting God is simply sin—the sin of unbelief. There really is no greater sin against the Holy God than to treat him as though he cannot be trusted.
Through various events God began to break through to me. And in the years since, I've begun to learn to trust God. What changes! What a transformation has occurred in my life.
I look back and say, "Why did I not trust him sooner?"
Life is full of “what ifs” and often they are negative, right? They are usually full of fear and worrisome imaginations. And when you focus on all those “what ifs,” when you allow your mind to go to those negative possibilities, it just discourages you and frankly, makes you miserable. So, let me ask you: How much time do you spend in the “what ifs” of life? In fear and worry, thinking about what could or might happen?
Here’s another “what if”: What if you changed “what if” to “even if”? Even if I lose my job. . . even if I get a bad health report, even if I’m robbed, even if someone I love dies. If you’re born from above through faith in Jesus Christ, what if you faced your “what ifs” with truth from God’s Word, truth that would set you free from the fear and worry and despair that your “what ifs” have caused?
We have promises from God’s Word that we should throw in the face of our “what ifs.” Promises like:
Isaiah 43:2: When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.
Hebrews 13:5: Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”
So, when you’re facing a “what if,” stop and talk to yourself. Seriously, you need to talk to yourself—out loud if possible—and remind yourself of God’s promises. Remind yourself of these truths. Bring those “what if” thoughts into captivity and make them obey the Lord.
You remember the story of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, those three Jewish young men who were forcibly taken from Jerusalem to Babylon to serve in King Nebuchadnezzar’s court. Shortly after they were forced into the service of this pagan king, they were faced with a direct affront to their faith in Jehovah God, as the king set up a golden image and said that everyone had to fall down and worship this pagan image or else be thrown into a fiery furnace.
Talk about “what if”! What if they continued to serve the true God, Jehovah, and refused to bow down and worship that golden idol? They would perish as young men in the prime of their lives. This was a serious what if; there was no question that refusing to obey the king’s order would result in death. So, what was their decision? Here it is from Daniel 3:16-18:
Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego replied to him, “King Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to deliver us from it, and he will deliver us from Your Majesty’s hand. But even if he does not, we want you to know, Your Majesty, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up.”
They went from “what if” to “even if” and declared that they trusted in their God to deliver them, but even if they were burned to death in that furnace, they would not bow to any other god.
Maybe you’re facing a fiery furnace of your own—something that could totally destroy you, or so it seems. Maybe a financial furnace, or a health furnace, or a relationship furnace, and you’re in the “what if” stage as you face that furnace. Can you replace your “what if” with an “even if,” declaring that even if your fears are realized, even if the worst happens, you will trust in God to deliver you, to go through it with you, and to rescue you?
Can you say with Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, “even if he does not,” you will trust him? That is walking by faith and not by sight, and even if your faith seems small or weak, God will be pleased with your “even if,” and you can be sure he will get you through. I pray you will place your trust in the same God who delivered these young men and who will deliver you.
And then there’s the story of Moses when God confronted him and told him he had a job for him to do—to face Pharaoh and deliver ...
You know, everybody needs encouragement and help at times, don't they? As I read 2 Corinthians 7, I realized that even the great Apostle Paul had his times when he needed other people. He said in verse 5: "For when we came into Macedonia, this body of ours had no rest, but we were harassed at every turn—conflicts on the outside, fears within."
Doesn't that describe the way you feel at times? Conflicts without, fears within? But this is the spiritual giant, Paul, and it surprises us to realize that he would have these same feelings. Well, we really need to remember that positions of prominence do not isolate anyone from being human. Paul was tired and fearful. He needed help.
Where did his help come from? He goes on to say, "But God, who comforts the downcast, comforted us by the coming of Titus.” He needed a friend at his side to comfort him, and so Titus came along. We could say to Paul, "But wasn't it enough to have the Lord there?” And Paul would respond, "The Lord was there in the person of Titus. He comforted me by sending Titus."
Yes indeed, that's how the Body of Christ should function. God wants to use us in each other's lives as messengers of comfort and encouragement, to pick each other up at those weary and frightened moments of our lives. God has given us each other for that purpose.
Paul goes on to say that he was comforted by the good report Titus brought to him of the concern for his welfare by his friends in Corinth. Paul needed to know that they cared, that they hadn't forgotten him, that they still loved him.
How often do we miss these opportunities to be God's comfort in the lives of others? How often do we need to be by a friend's side when they're experiencing dark days? Or send a message to them—by email, on the phone—just to say, I care.
Is there someone in your life that needs a Titus? Ask God to show you, and allow him to use you as his agent of comfort and encouragement.
Would you love to catch the next flight to some forgotten island and leave no forwarding address? Running away sure looks appealing sometimes, doesn't it? King David felt that way, too. He wrote, "Oh, that I had the wings of a dove! I would fly away and be at rest.”
Maybe your job is just driving you crazy. Could be a difficult boss or a boring job; could be the people you work with or too much work. Or perhaps you're having troubles with relationships; they can make you want to fly away. Maybe it's your spouse, or your child, or a close friend, a romantic relationship. Undoubtedly for many it's financial worries that make them want to run away.
Well, whatever it is that's giving you the run-away blues, I understand because I’ve been there. I remember when I begged God to let me out of a job I was in. I wanted out so badly, I thought I couldn't take another day. But God made it clear that he had a purpose in keeping me there for a while longer.
I look back and see why: I needed to learn many spiritual lessons in that spot. There were people with whom I formed friendships and shared my faith and trust in Jesus. I wouldn't have missed that opportunity for anything. And the business knowledge I gained by hanging in another couple of years gave me the resource and experience I needed to go out on my own which paved the way to begin this ministry.
Oh, it's easy to see that now, but at the time all I could do was simply agree with God to persevere. Second John 8 says " Watch out that you do not lose what we have worked for, but that you may be rewarded fully.” Most of us give up just before the victory! And when we do, we waste all the hard work and effort that's been poured into our lives.
I want to encourage you today to persevere. Say with King David that instead of running away you will "cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous fall."
Condemnation—isn't that an ugly word? Webster says that condemnation is the state of being pronounced unfit or unworthy, of being declared guilty. Condemnation is disapproval and lack of acceptance.
Have you been subjected to any condemnation lately? It can come from friends, from family, from bosses, from society. The world is full of condemnation—one person condemning another, one race condemning another, politicians condemning each other. I hate condemnation and I'm sure you do, too.
One of the most marvelous and wonderful truths of Scripture is that those of us who have made a personal commitment to Jesus Christ, who have been forgiven by him and accepted as God's child are free from condemnation. Paul writes in Romans 8 that “There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death (Romans 8:1-2). Now, is that good news, or what!
I love the Phillips translation of Romans 8:33-34: "Who would dare to accuse us, whom God has chosen? The judge himself has declared us free from sin. Who is in a position to condemn? Only Christ, and Christ died for us, Christ rose for us, Christ reigns in power for us, Christ prays for us!”
The next time you're feeling condemned, remember that if you belong to Jesus, he is the only one who can truly condemn you, and he doesn't. He may deal with you to bring your life more into conformity with his will, but he won't heap up condemnation on you.
Oh, it's not that we don't deserve his condemnation; all of us do. But the judge himself, Jesus Christ, has paid the penalty and taken our condemnation himself. So, we are no longer condemned. We are set free from the penalty which we deserve.
Keep this marvelous truth in the back of your mind all day. Rejoice in the fact that Jesus does not condemn you, so who else could possibly have a right to do that? You're free from condemnation, praise his holy name.
It’s July 4th, a special day for us here in the United States, as we celebrate the freedom that is ours because we live in this land. It’s a freedom we often take for granted, but we need to stop and thank God for the freedom we enjoy.
But you know, real freedom is when you are free from the things that keep you personally in bondage. No earthly government can grant you that freedom. It is found only in Jesus Christ.
What is holding you in bondage from which you really want to be set free?
Fear or guilt? Shame? Failures in your past? Wrongs done to you? Poor choices you’ve made? Insecurity? Pride?
Paul wrote to the Galatians: It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery (Galatians 5:1).
Mind you, Paul was writing to Christians, those who had declared themselves to be followers of Jesus Christ. And yet, Paul is encouraging them not to let themselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery because Christ had set them free.
When as Christians we continue to live in bondage to these things, it’s like someone has put us in a jail but they didn’t lock the door, so at any time we can push open that door and walk out to freedom, but we don’t. We sit in that jail cell, as though we cannot escape, when all the time all we have to do is push open the door and walk out.
Later in that letter to the Galatians Paul wrote: “You were called to be free. . .” If you’ve been born from above through faith in Jesus Christ, your calling from him is to be free from all that weighs you down. Jesus said, “So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed” (John 8:36).
So, as you celebrate our nation’s freedom, ask yourself if you are standing firm in the freedom that Christ has given you, or if you’re allowing yourself to be burdened by a yoke of slavery.
Once I was asked a very interesting question by a woman who had come to hear me speak. She said to me, "Are you a liberated woman?” I think that's a good question to consider as we celebrate July 4th tomorrow—the day we declared our freedom as a country. So in answer to this question: Are you a liberated woman?, my answer is a resounding YES! I am a liberated woman, because I've been set free by Jesus.
Paul wrote to the Romans: Don’t you know that when you offer yourselves to someone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one you obey—whether you are slaves to sin, which leads to death, or to obedience, which leads to righteousness? ….You have been set free from sin and have become slaves to righteousness….But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves of God, the benefit you reap leads to holiness, and the result is eternal life (Romans 6:16, 18, 22).
Hallelujah! I'm a liberated woman because I'm free from the curse of sin. That is true freedom; that is the personal freedom that so many are looking for today—but they’re looking in the wrong places. Jesus is the only one who can set us free indeed—that’s why he came.
The Bible says that as individuals we are each slaves—slaves to whatever masters us. What is mastering you today? Money? Possessions? Sex? Laziness? Food? Television? Pornography? Drugs? Alcohol? Work? Well, Jesus Christ offers liberation from anything that makes you into a slave and robs you of freedom.
Most people think freedom is the right to do whatever they want to do. Women over the past years have been led to believe that they'll find freedom in new opportunities. But it simply doesn't work. Only when Jesus sets you free do you really know what it means to be free.
I’m glad to say that I'm a liberated woman—free from being a slave to sin.
And because of that, I'm free from guilt. God has forgiven me for every sin that I've confessed to him, and furthermore, he has forgotten those sins. He doesn't hang them over my head ever again; I am no longer condemned. So, even though my past is not what it should be, I don't live under a cloud of guilt as so many people do. I'm free from guilt. I'm a liberated woman.
If you are looking for freedom, let me introduce you to Jesus Christ, who can set you free indeed.
This week on The Christian Working Woman you will meet Renee Pollino and hear how she founded a social justice coffee shop—yes, a coffee shop—that addresses social concerns and systemic injustice by offering employment to women who have been held in bondage by poverty, addictions, trafficking or life as a refugee. Renee’s story will inspire you—don’t miss it.
I’m offering five biblical principles which can help you when you’re dealing with difficult people, particularly on your job.
Our fifth and final principle is:
The “Speak Kind Words” Principle
Here are two verses from Proverbs that tell us how important it is to guard our words carefully and speak words of kindness. Anxiety weighs down the heart, but a kind word cheers it up (Proverbs 12:25).
A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.(Proverbs 25:11). "Aptly spoken words” are those which are strategically selected and gently delivered. They are "apt," they fit the situation perfectly. With "apt" words, you can change an ugly environment or situation into something beautiful—like "apples of gold in settings of silver."
For example, suppose you had to confront a person on your job who is repeatedly late to work. Which of these two approaches would be “aptly spoken words”?
1 “I want to point out something that is bothering me. You’ve been late to work a lot and it just drives me crazy. I want every person here on time every day. You’re paid to be here on time, so I’ll be expecting you to be on time every day from now on. I hope that is clear.”
2 “I’ve noticed that you have some difficulty getting to work on time. Perhaps there is some good reason for that; if so, you need to tell me so we can work it out by cutting your lunch time or having you work later each day. Is there some reason that makes it difficult for you to be here on time each day?”
It’s pretty obvious that the first example would cause a defensive, angry reaction and may or may not solve the problem, while the second approach shows some concern for the individual while at the same time making it clear that tardiness cannot be tolerated. Those are “aptly spoken words.”
So often our choice of words makes all the difference in how responsive the other person will be.
Have you ever worked with someone who was arrogant? A person who tried to tell you what to do and had delusions of grandeur? One of the many purposes of difficult relationships is to teach us needed and important lessons, and humility is certainly an important lesson we can learn through an arrogant co-worker.
The “Humble Yourself” Principle
In Luke 14:11 Jesus says: “For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.”
And in 1 Peter 5:6 we read: “Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time.”
Have you learned to look for opportunities to humble yourself? Now, I’m not talking about false humility, such as running yourself down, or refusing to accept a compliment, or walking around with your head hung low and trying to look humble. But most every day we will find opportunities to humble ourselves. For example, if you work with this bossy coworker, it is humbling to keep your mouth shut and not say something back to him or her. It is humbling to take that person’s suggestion.
I began asking God to show me when and how to humble myself. It’s a good prayer and I recommend it to you. I found that not insisting on my “rights” was one key way to humble myself; not talking about myself or my accomplishments was another. Not having to have the last word is a good way to humble yourself.
But don’t lose sight of the promises given to us when we truly are willing to humble ourselves. We will be lifted up and we will be exalted. Notice that Peter said we will be lifted up "in due time.” That's probably not as soon as you would like it to be, but it will be in the right time after you have learned the valuable lesson of humbling yourself.
So, if you have a difficult person to deal with, one who is arrogant or treats you in a condescending way, ask God to show you when you should humble yourself with this person. You’ll be amazed at the blessing it will bring to you when you practice this “humble yourself” principle. And humbling yourself is much easier than having to be humbled!
Do you have any enemies? Enemies are people who make your life uncomfortable, difficult, cause unnecessary hurt or discord, and are generally at odds against you in many ways, intentional or unintentional.
The "Love Your Enemy" Principle
Here is a principle from Matthew 5 that gives us direct guidance on dealing with a relationship “enemy.” “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy. But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous” (Matthew 5:43-45). What a revolutionary teaching this was. Never before had anyone taught such convoluted doctrine. It goes against all our instincts to love our enemies. It demands an attitude that is foreign to our natures. It requires a denial of self which seems imminently unfair and all but impossible.
That's the way it often is with biblical principles. They go against our grain, but if you have some relationship “enemies,” God will empower you to love them if you are willing. Remember, loving doesn’t necessarily mean liking. This kind of love is an action, a set of our will, a decision to act in loving ways, even though our feelings may not be warm and fuzzy. If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty, give him water to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head, and the Lord will reward you (Proverbs 25:21-22). In these two passages from Matthew and Proverbs we learn three things about how we are to treat our “enemies”:
We are to love our enemies. We are to pray for our enemies. We are to give our enemies what they need.
We aren't promised that our enemies will change, or that they will appreciate our loving attitude. But when we respond in loving ways toward people who make our lives difficult, we keep ourselves from sinning and we demonstrate the love of Jesus in very real ways.
I’m taking a look at some biblical principles which give us guidance when we have to deal with a difficult relationship—like a co-worker who is lazy, or uncooperative, or negative, to name a few.
The "Speak-the-Truth-in-Love" Principle
Ephesians 4:14 and 15 gives us a very important principle: Then we will no longer be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of people in their deceitful scheming. Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ. Speaking the truth to people is sometimes the part we are called on to play in their lives to help them grow. Of course, the operative word here is "love.” Have you ever spoken the truth in haste or anger? Often truth is spoken in hatred and vindictiveness. Truth can be spoken with malice or in defensiveness.
You see, the truth can often be very painful. When we speak it in anything but love, we can open a door that never should be opened and cause a rift in a relationship that may never be healed.
Which would describe you best?
Would you say that you have difficulty speaking the truth in love even when you know you should? If so, is that because you hate confrontations, or fear rejection or repercussions? Or perhaps you feel guilty since you know that you’re not perfect either. Or would you say that you speak the truth too freely and often without compassion or forethought?
In practicing this biblical principle of speaking the truth in love, you need to exercise extreme caution. Words are very powerful and need to bathed in prayer. Your motivation must be carefully scrutinized to make certain that you are speaking the truth in love for the right reason at the right time.
However, remember that speaking the truth in love is a biblical principle, and when God puts you in a position where you should do just that, to fail to do so is to rob that person of an opportunity to become more mature.
Relationships are the sandpaper of life. Isn’t it often true that the relationship struggles of your life are used by God to refine you and teach you and help you grow to maturity? I want to talk about five biblical principles we need to know when we are experiencing relationship difficulties on our jobs.
The Extra-Mile Principle
We are called to have an extra-mile attitude in our relationships with others. Matthew 5:38-41 is pretty clear about this:
“You have heard that it was said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth. But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also. And if anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your coat as well. If anyone forces you to go one mile, go with them two miles.”
What does it mean to have an extra-mile attitude, to turn the other cheek, to give your cloak as well as your shirt? Don’t you think Jesus was trying to teach us
to endure unfair treatment at times, without griping or complaining? to refrain from saying some of the things we would like to say to that difficult coworker. to do some work we don’t have to do or want to do? to put in extra time and effort to help a difficult person?
Surely that is all a part of this extra mile principle. And it would lead you to endure at times, and to do more than perhaps even your employer would require or expect of you. But there is also a balance we must find. I believe that Jesus gave us boundaries with this extra mile principle, and he definitely is not teaching us to endure any kind of treatment or to put up with unacceptable behavior or habits forever and never say anything negative to anyone.
Do you go the extra mile with those difficult relationships? The extra mile principle is one we need to apply to difficult relationships and when we are willing to go that extra mile, it can often open a door for a miracle.
Presented by Lisa Bishop
It is true that joy can often feel fleeting. It can be hard to hold onto. Sometimes taking hold of joy can be like trying to grab a cloud, it slips through your fingers, evading you.
If you find yourself struggling to experience joy in your life, you are not alone. I struggle too. It’s part of being human and living on this side of eternity. But there is hope because God cares about your joy. He wants you to experience happiness and high spirits. I think sometimes we forget that. We can see life as drudgery at times and forget that God wants us to experience delight!
Speaking of happiness, sometimes we pit joy and happiness against each other. So, I am going to submit that joy and happiness aren’t exclusive to each other! A dictionary definition of happiness is “a state of well-being; a pleasurable or satisfying experience.” One definition of the word joy comes from the Greek word chara (ha-(with a rolled r)- a), which means “gladness” or “cheerfulness.”
Depending on the translation, the Bible uses the words happy and happiness about 30 times, and joy and rejoice over 300 times. We know when we see words or themes repeated in God’s Word he wants to get our attention! Your joy matters to God and when you are joyful, you feel happy! The key is what you rely on for ultimate joy and where your focus lies. If you were to look up the references to joy and rejoicing in the Bible you will see that its cause and effect are from the same source. God. He is the root of your joy and you experience joy because of him.
Psalm 94:19 When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought me joy.
Psalm 16:11
You make known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.
God is our reason for joy and we express our joy to God when we rejoice in him.
As Philippians 4:4 instructs us: Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice!
God your Father is the giver of all things and he’s looking for every opportunity to bless you. He wants you to experience happiness and joy in his creation, in the things he has made. He loves to see you experiencing delight in that promotion at work, a new relationship, a vacation with friends, at the birth of your kids, in a bowl of ice cream. Yes, I did just say ice cream. God made that too.
Sometimes we complicate joy. Joy can be found in simple moments as well as in the big events of life. The important thing to remember is your source of joy, and that is Jesus. Don’t get too lured in by being distracted by the created things and lose your affection for the Creator. When you rely on external things to sustain your joy you will be misguided. When you base joy purely on your circumstances you will be sorely disappointed, which brings me to another point about joy.
In the midst of unpleasant circumstances, joy is possible. Even when life gives you a one-two punch and knocks the wind out of your sails, you can hang onto joy. Happiness and disappointment, joy and sorrow, can coexist. I know that feels counterintuitive and really HARD at times!
Yet all throughout the bible we see evidence of this and Psalm 13 gives us a real-life example as the Psalmist in his pain and despair says:
How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and day after day have sorrow in my heart? How long will my enemy triumph over me? Look on me and answer, Lord my God. Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death, and my enemy will say, “I have overcome him,” and my foes will rejoice when I fall. But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation I will sing the Lord’s praise, for he has been good to me.
How can the Psalmist rejoice, how can he express joy in the middle of sorrow? Because ultimately joy is a long-haul perspective not one that is limited by shorter-term circumstances.
How joyful are you? Here are a few more ways to cultivate a more cheerful and glad spirit. And the first way is to:
Practice Patience and Pray
We have all experienced impatience in our lives. That irritability and dis-ease when you’re waiting for something and it feels like it’s taking forever to materialize. When something does not happen on your timeline you can lose hope and it can mess with your joy. When it comes down to it, impatience is really an indicator that you do not trust God and his timing. It’s a signal that you lack faith that God is working things out on your behalf and as a result, you can become heavy-hearted. To cultivate joy in the waiting, Romans 12:12 is a call to action: “Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.”
Another way to intentionally cultivate joy in your life is to:
Mind Your Mind
According to Proverbs 17:22: “A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones” (ESV).
A joyful, positive mindset is key to experiencing a healthy and fulfilling life. The heart is your inner self, thoughts, emotions, and will. Good medicine refers to something that treats or alleviates the symptoms of disease. One translation of this verse says, “A cheerful heart causes good healing.”
All throughout Scripture we see the potent effects of the mind on the body. A joyful heart is good because it generates health and healing in your inner being. In contrast a crushed spirit dries up the bones or as Proverbs 12:25 explains, “anxiety in the heart of a person causes depression.” Interestingly these nuggets of wisdom are backed up by scientific studies that demonstrate the mind’s powerful influence over the body. A cheerful, contented temperament not only fortifies your mental health but enables your body to resist the attacks of physical disease.
That’s another reason to be enamored with God and how he created our minds and bodies. And, why he created you to experience joy! So if good medicine is a joyful heart, how can you foster and promote internal joy? Scripture says that God’s laws, precepts, and statutes refresh the soul and gladden the heart.
Psalm 19:7a says, “The law of the Lord is perfect, refreshing the soul.” And the prophet Jeremiah testified, “When your words came, I ate them; they were my joy and my heart’s delight” (Jeremiah 15:16a).
Setting apart intentional time to be with God, meditating on his Word, his character, and his promises, is a guaranteed way to do your heart some good.
Do you let other people steal your joy?
We all know people who walk through life acting like victims of their circumstances. They blame the weather, traffic, their job, or other life situations for being miserable. They look for any reason to complain, to be downcast and grumpy. When something does not go their way they find a way to complain and grumble. They are people who allow others to impact their joy and ones who can suck the joy right out of the air.
Several years ago I would ride the elevator with the same guy every week. In an attempt to make small talk, I would ask him how he was doing. His response was, “Okay for a Monday.” What a downer! How many times have we caught ourselves thinking that or even saying that out loud? If Mondays dictate that your life will be dull and less than desirable, you have just squandered 1/7th of your life. Think about it. When you put it that way it’s certainly motivation to change your tune.
You and I have the power to choose our attitude. You are ultimately in charge of the way you respond to life’s circumstances, the people around you and even Mondays. You have the power to control how you react to life. No one or nothing can make you feel or act a certain way. And nothing can steal your joy unless you give it permission. And here’s the deal: As a follower of Jesus, you have a holy advantage on happiness in life. My friend, you have the power of the Holy Spirit dwelling in you and you know what? The Holy Spirit produces all sorts of amazing things in your life and one of them is joy.
Galatians 5:22-23a says, “The Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control” (NLT).
When the Holy Spirit produces joy he is producing cheerfulness, delight, and gladness in you. If you are not experiencing joy take some time to get curious and seek why. I’m not saying you will experience joy 24/7/365, but if your life is marred more by gloominess, despair, or unhappiness it’s time to do some self-reflection. Maybe you are more focused on what is not going the way you want in life and you need to put some effort into dwelling on the things to be grateful for. Maybe you are blaming others and outside circumstances for your outlook and disposition rather than owning your power to choose how you will respond to life’s circumstances.
If you want to live the spirit-filled, holy spirit-empowered life and experience the fullness of the fruit of joy, don’t let outside circumstances dictate your happiness. Ditch the critical spirit and ask Jesus to help you count your blessings.
Do you remember the catchy tune, “I’ve got the joy, joy, joy, joy, deep in my heart?” The song often referred to as “I’ve Got the Joy,” is often sung at Sunday school and around the campfire and is a reminder that joy is an essential part of the Christian life. The song’s chorus is: “And I’m so happy, so very happy I’ve got the love of Jesus in my heart Down in my heart.” It reminds us as followers of Jesus that it is important to know that the source of true joy is in our
relationship with God. Joy is not just a fleeting feeling. It’s a steadfast and enduring state of being that can be experienced even in the midst of trials and challenges because of its source, Jesus.
The Bible provides numerous examples to help us experience joy. Whether it is through seeking God’s presence, trusting in his promises, or cultivating a heart of gratitude, Scripture tells us that joy is attainable and can bring a sense of peace and contentment to your daily life.
But there are things that can kill your joy and one of those things is putting confidence in your flesh! Why? Because your flesh will fail and you will make mistakes in life. So misplacing your joy and confidence by placing it in yourself and what you do—what you are capable of—will lead to disastrous results.
When it comes to putting your confidence and joy in the Lord and not in yourself, the Apostle Paul gives us a solid example. In chapter 3 of his letter to the Philippians Paul says: “Further, my brothers and sisters, rejoice in the Lord! It is no trouble for me to write the same things to you again, and it is a safeguard for you. Watch out for those dogs, those evildoers, those mutilators of the flesh. For it is we who are the circumcision, we who serve God by his Spirit, who boast in Christ Jesus, and who put no confidence in the flesh—though I myself have reasons for such confidence. If someone else thinks they have reasons to put confidence in the flesh, I have more” (Philippians 3:1-4).
Paul then goes on to list over seven reasons for fleshy confidence. And then he says, “But whatever were gains to me I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them garbage, that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ—the righteousness that comes from God on the basis of faith” (Philippians 3:7-9).
Paul shows us to not think so highly of ourselves but to rejoice in Jesus. Reminding us that gaining Christ and being found in him are the true keys to your joy.
Have you ever heard the saying “Comparison is the thief of joy?” We’re talking about joy killers and a sure-fire killjoy is comparison.
Have you ever been scrolling through LinkedIn when you see someone posting about a new job or promotion and you think, “Their life looks ideal. They're probably rolling in the dough and loving life.” Or maybe you find yourself swept up in social media, stumbling upon pictures of seemingly perfect families. The kids are smiling, dressed perfectly, even the dog is smiling, and the husband and wife look so in love. You look at other people’s lives and think you got the short end of the stick.
When you survey other people’s lives and surmise that theirs is way better than yours, you set yourself up to be disgruntled and you can be tempted to lament yours. Comparison can make you anxious and depressed and lure you into believing you are missing out on life. We all do it. It’s part of being human, but if we aren’t careful we can find ourselves down the rabbit hole of discontentment.
The other day I came across an article on Michelangelo, perhaps the most celebrated Renaissance artist of all time. The article talked about a poem Michelangelo wrote describing how much he hated painting the Sistine Chapel! He famously worked 65 feet in the air on custom scaffolding and wrote about the four years of physical toil. “I’ve already grown a goiter from this torture, hunched up there like a cat….. My stomach's squashed under my skin,....my brain’s crushed in a casket…..My brush, above me all the time, dribbles paint so my face makes a fine floor for droppings.” Who knew Michelangelo was so disgruntled when everything looked so picture-perfect?
We can often look into people’s lives and think everything is going swimmingly when in fact they are experiencing their own version of despising life. Not everything is as it seems. And comparing your life to others can provoke you to think and maybe even do some crazy things. It reminds me of the story of brothers Cain and Abel in Genesis chapter four. The account tells us that God was pleased with Abel’s offering and not Cain’s. Abel seemed to have a better life, more favor from God, and that caused resentment and envy to begin to build up in his brother. Cain resented God for blessing his brother and began despising Abel, which eventually led Cain to murder him. Now I know that is an extreme example but comparison can kill your joy and it is a slippery slope.
Who are you comparing yourself to? Whose life may look more pleasing than yours? How are you letting other people’s seemingly perfect life steal your joy?
There are joy killers in life and I want to talk about the keys to cultivating greater joy. Who doesn’t want more joy? And here is what is true: You were created to experience joy. So why can it feel so fleeting at times? The first joy killer is putting your joy in the wrong things.
Several years ago I read a book, Man’s Search for Meaning, by Viktor Frankl. One of the themes of the book is the idea that as human beings, we think we are in search of pleasure in life but what we really seek, what our hearts truly long for is purpose. We want our lives to have meaning but we can get sidetracked in the pursuit of pleasure. While life does bring pleasure and God designed us to experience it, when we chase it or base our ultimate joy and satisfaction on it, we will be depressed and sorely disappointed.
The Old Testament book of Ecclesiastes has the well-known verse, “meaningless, meaningless, everything is meaningless.” Ecclesiastes describes King Solomon’s account of the suffering, misery, and emptiness that came from seeking after foolishness, meaninglessness, and materialistic pursuit; and that ultimate hope and meaning is in discovering truth and seeking after God. Solomon tried the world’s brand of happiness and found it to be lacking as we hear his words in Ecclesiastes 2:1-2. “I said to myself, ‘Come now, I will test you with pleasure to find out what is good.’ But that also proved to be meaningless. ‘Laughter,’ I said, ‘is madness. And what does pleasure accomplish?’”
As a King, he had all of life’s pleasures at his fingertips. Although he could have anything his heart desired, nothing he found satisfied him for the long term. Even the work of his hands, although a good and meaningful aspect of human existence, led to frustration, failure, grief, and pain. While there is an overall depressing tone to the book, Solomon’s conclusion points us to look beyond this life for our ultimate hope and that no amount of wealth, power, prestige, success, relationships or even wisdom will fully satisfy the longing of the human heart. Only Jesus can provide what nothing on this earth can deliver.
Life remains toilsome and frustrating at times, but Jesus gives meaning, purpose, and mission to those who believe and trust in him for their salvation. We do not have to follow the path of the world and seek fulfillment in things that will ultimately leave us craving for more. The joy of the world is hollow, but the joy of the Lord which comes from knowing God, abiding in Christ, and being filled with the Holy Spirit, is rich and abundant. The world’s happiness will fade but the key to cultivating true joy is to be deeply rooted in a relationship with our Savior and find our meaning in him.
Years ago I began to question the self-esteem message which was everywhere. They said you had to feel good about yourself in order to have a good life. But something in my spirit just didn’t jive with it. I couldn’t find anything like it in Scripture. I knew from Scripture that the best things I could do looked like filthy rags to God.
And furthermore, I had enough experience with me to know that I did not hold the key to my happiness. For ten years I took myself on a pursuit of self-esteem and ended up in a sinful lifestyle, unfulfilled and very frustrated. I fully got it—that trying to find joy and peace and meaning in who I am was a losing battle. And God was teaching me through his Word that my pursuit of good self-esteem was a dead-end street.
As one writer puts it: “We eventually figure out that being the star of our own show actually makes life a tragedy. When life is all about us—what we can do, how we perform—our world becomes small and smothering; we shrink. To have everything riding on ourselves leads to despair, not deliverance.” (Jesus+Nothing=Everything)
Jesus said it this way:
For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it (Matthew 16:25).
If you are a Christ-follower, the life you were meant to live is to lose your life for Jesus. Paul said: “For to me, to live is Christ.” And, “I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me” (Galatians 2:20).
This completely turns the pursuit of self-esteem on its ears and gives us an entirely opposite recipe for life: Lose your life for Jesus. It’s not “Go find yourself” or “Discover the real you” or “Feel good about yourself.” It’s forget yourself! Come and discover the joy of self-forgetfulness.
When you can come to the place where life is so not all about you that you truly don’t think about yourself first and foremost all the time, you are beginning to walk in the freedom that Jesus came to give you. Believe me, there is great joy in self-forgetfulness. It’s really, really simple. But it’s really, really important. The life you were meant to live is found in forgetting about yourself.
What does it mean to lose your life for Jesus? Let me begin by saying what it does not mean. Losing your life for Jesus and forgetting about yourself doesn’t mean that you are not valuable and worthwhile. You are so valuable to God that he sent Jesus to purchase your redemption. He knows the worst about you and loves you with a love that will never cease and nothing—absolutely nothing—can separate you from his love. He knows your name, he calls you precious; he rejoices over you with singing; he delights in you. I’m not making this up—it’s all in the Bible. You are valuable because you are personally loved by the God who created the heavens and the earth.
Losing your life for Jesus doesn’t mean that you become a doormat or a victim. It doesn’t mean that you don’t take care of yourself or set boundaries or say no when appropriate. It doesn’t mean you wear long faces and ugly clothes (unless you want to!).
Here’s the best way I can describe it: Forgetting about yourself means that you put Jesus on the throne of your heart, and he’s there to stay. He becomes and remains the most important person and the most important commitment in your life. You get rid of other idols in your heart.
It means that you invest time and energy into getting to know him through his Word. It means that you truly want to help others; you truly care about others, you love others because you love Jesus and his love is spread in your heart and it overflows to others.
Losing your life for Jesus means anything you need to give up for his sake is okay with you. Money loses some of its allurement, its grip on your heart. Success becomes redefined as hearing Jesus say, “Well done,
There is no more effective testimony that you can have as a Christ-follower than to consistently be a joyful person. Someone has said, “Joy is the flag flying high above the castle of the heart, announcing that the King is in residence there." How’s your flag doing? Is it flying high these days, or are you allowing something or someone to steal your joy?
Well, what can you do to get that joy flag flying high over your heart again, so people will see that Jesus lives there? Here are three verses from Psalms that tell us how:
Psalm 16:11: “You make known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.” Joy comes the more you are in his presence—finding joy in knowing God through Jesus and spending time each day with him—just you and God. Are you doing that? When you do, you will be filled with joy.
Psalm 19:8a: “The precepts of the Lord are right, giving joy to the heart.” God’s word gives joy. It’s just that simple. Reading God’s word, memorizing it, studying it—I promise, it brings joy to your heart, no matter what’s going on. So, is Bible reading a high priority on your to-do list each day? It will put joy in your heart.
Psalm 5:11: “But let all who take refuge in you be glad; let them ever sing for joy. Spread your protection over them, that those who love your name may rejoice in you.” Do you know what it means to take refuge in the Lord? It just means you run to him first when you need comfort or help or strength. He will spread his protection over you and shield you from those joy-stealers. Do you love the name of Jesus? Is it the sweetest name you know? Do you love to talk about him, sing about him; is Jesus everything to you? You will rejoice and be joyful when that is true.
It's time to unwrap that flag of joy, raise it to the top of the mast, and fly it high!
Sometimes our joy is lost because of where we allow our minds and thoughts to go.
For example, are you harboring any bitterness? Maybe it’s just a wee bit, but there it sits in your mind: that resentment and anger and self-pity that you’ve never really given over to Jesus. You try to erase it from your memory but it just keeps coming back, bringing with it all that hurt from who knows how long ago. And that bitterness starts to eat away at you again.
Maybe you thought you had forgiven them but it just keeps creeping back into your mind. Well, that’s because sometimes you have to forgive the same thing many times. When Peter asked how many times he should forgive, and suggested seven should be very generous, Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times” (Matthew 18:22). In other words, just forgive again, but above all else, don’t let that bitter root stay there because it will grow and cause you to be cynical and unloving. It is a major joy-stealer.
And did you realize that envy can steal your joy—the act of comparing yourself to others? When you compare yourself to others and feel envious of who they are or what they have, you are opening your door for Satan to come in and steal your joy—guaranteed. Someone has said that envy makes us root against the well-being of other people, and you can be sure that envy will leave no room for joy in your heart.
So, if bitterness or envy has found a place in your mind, you can do something about that today, this minute. By God’s grace, refuse to let those envious thoughts dwell in your mind—run them out, replace them with good thoughts, and when you get rid of them, joy will return.
We know that joy should be the trademark of a Christian. But the thing is, there is so much negativity and bad news in our world today that if you’re not careful, the enemy will steal your joy. That’s one of his favorite tactics. So, what or who has been stealing your joy?
Whatever or whoever it is, realize that it is a satanic flaming arrow coming your way, so put on your full armor and refuse to lose your joy. How? First, resist the devil as the Bible says, out loud if possible; just resist him verbally. Let him know you’re on to him, and you are not subject to his joy-stealing ways, resist his onslaught, and the Bible says he will flee from you. So, that’s step one.
Maybe you’re thinking that there really isn’t much to be joyful about: You’ve got money problems, or health issues, or there’s a relationship that’s going sour—or on and on and on. We live in a world packed full of stress and worry and trauma and discord. So, there’s plenty of joy-stealers hanging around these days.
But as Christ-followers, we are supposed to rejoice always, right? That’s what the Apostle Paul told us over and over, and believe me, he had plenty of joy-stealers in his life, too. So, being joyful has to rise above our circumstances, doesn’t it?
If you want joy in your life, first pray Psalm 51:12: “Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.” Remember the joy of your salvation? Remember the joy, the amazing peace, the freedom from sin that received from Jesus? Ask God to restore that joy to you.
Then, do something positive to get the joy going. Sing or hum a praise song. Just sing to yourself. I mean, actually sing good songs to yourself. Sing words into your ears and into your heart. Find the humor in your day. Laugh a lot. Then, make a list of answered prayer. Or make a list of what you have to be thankful for. Make yourself focus on the good reports instead of on the joy-stealers.
Do you ever wake up some days and just feel like everything’s wrong and nothing is right? I have those days. The joy of the Lord that we often sing about or talk about just seems to be absent. You know, when that happens, it’s a good time to just stop and ask yourself, “What is stealing my joy?”
Sometimes we let people steal our joy, don’t we? It could be that person you work with that just pushes your buttons, or makes your job more difficult, or disrespects you in some way. It could be someone you live with—a mate or family member—just people. Our lives are full of people and they often cause us lots of stress, frustrate us, and steal our joy.
What can you do when someone steals your joy—a lot? First, learn to put a shield up against their criticism or negativity or whatever it is they do or say that steals your joy. Pray in advance that God will help you shield your mind and emotions from their joy-stealing tactics. As my friend, Jan Silvious, says, picture yourself in a castle with a moat around you, and just pull up the bridge when the joy-stealer comes your way. You may not be able to avoid them, but you can shield your mind from them.
Also, don’t spend any more time than you have to with joy-stealers. Proverbs 13:20 says, “Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.” Choose your companions carefully. Certainly we never treat anyone unkindly or arrogantly, but it is important that we avoid people who continually try to steal our joy.
It’s important to pray for those people in your life who are difficult. Ask God to help you understand why they are the way they are—to see them as God sees them. When you can look beyond their behavior and have some understanding of what lies behind it, you may be amazed at how that changes your feelings and actually gives you compassion so that they just can’t steal your joy any longer, even if they never change.
If you could measure joy—how joyful you are—any guess what score you would get? Have you been joyful much lately?
Well, there is no way to measure just how joyful you are, but you surely know when you’re not joyful, right? So, my question is, “What is stealing your joy?” We know from Galatians 5 that joy is part of the fruit of the Spirit—evidence that the Spirit of God indwells you. So, as Christ-followers, joy should be our trademark. But too often it seems like joy is very elusive. One day we get a flash of joy, but life seems to steal our joy so easily, and it can seem pretty bleak.
Could it be that guilt or shame is stealing your joy? Do you beat yourself up a lot because you keep dwelling on how you don’t measure up? Maybe you are ashamed of something in your past, or feeling guilty because you blew it yesterday? Well, here’s some good news for you, as someone has said, Jesus doesn’t follow you around with a scorecard. He’s not making a list and checking it twice—no way. Jesus wants you to live in freedom from your past, freedom for sins that have been forgiven.
I love this verse from Isaiah 61:7: “Instead of your shame you will receive a double portion, and instead of disgrace you will rejoice in your inheritance. And so you will inherit a double portion in your land, and everlasting joy will be yours.” Of course, this was written to the people of Israel, but it applies to us as well. Jesus is your friend as well as your Savior, and he wants to give you a double portion of his grace and replace that disgrace, that shame you’re carrying around with his everlasting joy.
In Hebrews we read that Jesus endured the cross and scorned its shame for the joy that was set before him. He scorned the shame of the cross—he rejected that scorn, he refused it—so that you as his child can refuse the shame that is stealing your joy.
I just want to encourage you to refuse to let the enemy steal your joy. That is his modus operandi—he’s a thief and a robber. What can you do? Sing songs of praise; recite all you have to be thankful for; tell someone about Jesus. Stand up to the enemy and resist him by faith; he’ll give up pretty quickly in the face of praise, and the joy of the Lord can again be your strength.
If self-discipline could be measured, would you measure up? I’ve been reminding you that being a disciplined person is essential for success, and it certainly is a requirement for us as followers of Jesus Christ. Discipline is a spiritual issue. We will be accountable to the Lord for the use of our time, our skills and our resources, and you have to be disciplined to do that well.
I read this recently: “Stop looking for ways to boost your motivation. Success doesn’t come from having more motivation. It comes from doing what you need to do, even if you don’t have the motivation to do it. It’s called DISCIPLINE.”
This says that discipline must be imposed in our lives whether we feel like it or not. If your discipline depends on the mood you’re in, or whether you got a good night’s sleep or not, or if you just don’t feel so good, you will be a very sporadically disciplined person—on and off; hot and cold; inconsistent. As I said before, “Discipline is the ability to make yourself do something you don’t want to do in order to get a result you really want to get.”
Hebrews 12:11 says: “No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.”
Becoming a more disciplined person means you will have a more peaceful life and the fruit of discipline will make you more mature in your faith. Discipline comes in many forms but any time you decide to be more disciplined in some needed area, you will grow spiritually and you will be more pleasing to the Lord.
If you need lots of discipline in your life, take baby steps—one thing at a time—because as you are successful in one area, you will want to be successful in others as well. You have much to look forward to—much peace and joy—as you become more and more disciplined in your life. So, choose the pain of discipline and not the pain of regret.
Though it may sound too good to be true, I assure you there is joy in putting needed disciplines in your life. But like everything that is worthwhile, it takes some commitment and work on our part. I remind you that we must all suffer from one of two pains: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret.
I want to mention two good work habits that will go a long way toward making you successful:
Being on Time
Do you have difficulty being on time? Maybe it’s because you don’t get up early enough—which we talked about earlier. If your morning routine is rush, rush, rush because you don’t get out of bed until the last minute, then you see how lack of discipline in one area spills over to other areas of your life. And being habitually late does not show a Christ-like thoughtfulness of others and their time.
Whatever excuses you have come up with to justify always being late, if you’re willing to become disciplined, you will greatly reduce the stress in your life. We perpetuate most of our stress by our lack of discipline, and this is one of those examples of unnecessary stress caused by tardiness.
Put some reminders in place; set your phone or watch to remind you when you need to be on time. Figure out what you have to do to break this bad habit and impose that discipline on yourself. Do it for a week and see what a difference it makes. You’ll be hooked.
Keeping Promises and Commitments
This is the second good work habit that will make a difference. The Bible says: “Now it is required that those who have been given a trust must prove faithful” (1 Corinthians 4:2).
When you make a promise or commitment, others are trusting you to keep it—right? So, you must prove faithful—not an option. In Ecclesiastes we read: "It is better not to make a vow than to make one and not fulfill it" (Ecclesiastes 5:5). Another way to put that is “Under promise and over deliver.” Promise keeping requires discipline. It takes carefully keeping a record of whatever you’ve promised to do, and then just doing it as you promised. Simple, but it takes discipline and it will give back great rewards when you do. You’ll be happy—joyful—that you were disciplined.
I know it’s not your favorite topic but the importance of being disciplined is one of the most important keys to your success in life. I read this somewhere: “The undisciplined are slaves to moods, appetites and passions.” Wow, that’s rather strong, isn’t it? But there’s truth in it. This is how the Bible puts it in Proverbs 5:22-23:
“The evil deeds of the wicked ensnare them; the cords of their sins hold them fast. For lack of discipline they will die, led astray by their own great folly.”
That’s pretty strong, I would say. It says that lack of discipline holds you fast in the cords of sin and can cause death. Obviously, being a disciplined person is a spiritual issue for us as Christ-followers.
A discipline that impacts your success is eliminating the bad habit of procrastination. You know, putting off until tomorrow what you should do today. Does that ring a bell with you?
I don’t have to explain the problems you create for yourself when you procrastinate, right? Things pile up, you miss critical deadlines, and when you finally get around to doing what you’re supposed to do, you’re in such a rush you do a bad job. And that’s just for starts.
Here is a sure-fire cure for procrastination. Ready? Whatever you have to do today that you don’t want to do, do it first! I promise it works because it has worked for me for years. It’s simple and it works. Now, I know you can’t always do that dreaded thing first but do it as soon as you can. Get it behind you. It sets you free for the rest of the day.
And here’s another suggestion: Take a big job and break it into small parts, put a time frame for each part and then do one small piece at a time. When a job is big, it discourages you because it looks like mission impossible. But you can succeed one piece at a time.
So, I want to encourage you not to be a slave to procrastination. You won’t believe how good you’ll feel when you get those things done that you really don’t want to do—and you do it right. Just do it now and do it right. You’ll be glad you did.
Would you describe yourself as a disciplined person? Did you know that there is joy in being disciplined? If that seems like an oxymoron—how could discipline be joyful?—hang with me and you’ll see want I mean. First, it might be good to define exactly what I mean by being disciplined. Here’s a good definition:
“Discipline is the ability to make yourself do something you don’t want to do in order to get a result you really want to get.”
That’s what I mean by discipline. I have to impose discipline on myself because it is not natural or easy for me. But I’ve lived long enough to know that without imposing discipline in my life, I’ll never get the results I want. However, even more importantly, I’ll never do all the good works God planned for me to do without being disciplined.
Here’s a discipline that makes a difference in your day-to-day responsibilities and in your spiritual welfare as well. And that is the discipline of getting up early enough each day to start your day right, to have time to read your Bible and pray about the day ahead, to get started without stress and chaos.
You know, your day is won or lost in the morning hours. Are you able to make yourself get out of that bed so that you can get the result you want for the day? Oh, I think I can hear someone saying, “But I’m not a morning person!” Okay—maybe it’s true that you are more of a night owl but here’s the thing: Your day begins early—at least for most of us—and if you don’t take advantage of those early hours, you’re missing a great opportunity to get a real jump on your day.
So, let me encourage you to impose this discipline of getting up early enough to begin your day right. The Psalmist put it this way:
“Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days” (Psalm 90:14).
Getting up early will help you sing for joy and be glad all day. Try it!
If you made a list of all your favorite words, would “discipline” be one of them? I rather doubt it; I don’t think it would make my list. To me, discipline is a chore, a major chore, and if I could find some way to get through life without it, accomplishing what I want to accomplish, believe me, I would try.
So why am I talking about discipline, and why would I title this series “The Joy of Discipline”? Because even though we don’t like the word and what it represents so much, the truth is: Discipline is necessary. It's necessary, that is, if you truly want to accomplish something worthwhile in your life and reach your objectives. It's necessary if you want to turn your dreams into accomplishments. It's necessary if you're not willing to settle for mediocrity or mundaneness.
And let me just make one point which is so very critical:
Lack of discipline is self-inflicted suffering!
Discipline is not fun—at least not all the time! But, if you refuse to impose discipline on yourself, you will inflict suffering on yourself. As someone has said, “We must all suffer from one of two pains: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret. The difference is discipline weighs ounces while regret weighs tons.”
So, choosing discipline over regrets makes for joy! There is joy in being a disciplined person.
Here are some verses from Proverbs that tell us the value of discipline:
"For this command is a lamp, this teaching is a light, and correction and instruction are the way to life" (Proverbs 6:23).
"Whoever disregards discipline comes to poverty and shame, but whoever heeds correction is honored" (Proverbs 13:18).
"Those who disregard discipline despise themselves, but the one who heeds correction gains understanding" (Proverbs 15:32).
Wise Solomon points out that discipline brings understanding and honor, avoids poverty and shame, and is the way to life. Imposing needed disciplines is guaranteed by God’s Word to make wonderful, joyful changes in your life.
Of course, that takes intentionality—you have to make it happen. I’m going to give you some easy, practical suggestions that may help you impose discipline where you need it. I will be sharing from my own struggles and failures and—believe it or not—successes. I am living proof that anyone can acquire discipline!
We’ve seen examples, in our Fran and Jesus story, of the problems that Fran had with setting reasonable boundaries in her life. And that led to lots of unnecessary stress, some false guilt, and enabling others to avoid doing what they were supposed to do. I have to admit that I have struggled with setting and keeping reasonable boundaries, how about you?
The challenge of setting boundaries is almost always a relationship issue. And it frequently comes from our misplaced idea of what it means to be a good friend, or what it means to be a good team player. There’s no doubt that as Christ-followers, our standard given to us by Jesus himself is to go the extra mile, to do more than is required of us. We are called to be servants, as Jesus was, and that should always be our attitude.
But when we try to do more than we should do and we think that going the extra mile means we jump through everyone’s hoops and meet everyone’s expectations, we are then in dangerous territory. This is how we become burned out; it’s how we become enablers; it’s how we allow false guilt to drive us into exhaustion and resentment.
I would remind you that Jesus knew how to say no. Do you remember when the disciples were looking for Jesus one morning because a crowd of people had gathered to hear Jesus again, and no doubt were eager to take advantage of his gift of healing? They found him alone, praying, and they exclaimed: “Everyone is looking for you!” Jesus replied, “Let us go somewhere else—to the nearby villages—so I can preach there also. That is why I have come.” The disciples tried to tell Jesus that he should come back and preach to the crowd waiting for him, but Jesus knew when to say no. You’ll find that story in Mark 1.
Another time a man stopped him and said, “Teacher, tell my brother to divide the inheritance with me.” But Jesus said to him, “Man, who made me a judge or arbitrator over you?” Basically Jesus said, “Sorry, that’s not my job.” He drew a boundary and said no, even though he could have done it but it was not what he was sent to do. You’ll find that story in Luke 12.
Jesus knew that he could not please everyone; in his human body while here on earth he had physical limitations, as we do. He became weary, as we do. He needed rest and time alone, as we do. And in order to do what God had sent him to do, he had to refuse to do other things—he had to draw boundaries. I believe his example teaches us that we must also learn to draw reasonable boundaries in order for us to be able to do what God wants us to do.
Do you ever feel like you’re hanging on by your shoestrings? That’s where our friend, Fran is in this latest episode of Fran and Jesus on the Job, because she is having a hard time setting some reasonable boundaries with friends and coworkers, and even with her boss.
Finally, it’s Friday and Fran is running on fumes. “Thank God it’s Friday,” she says to herself. “I can take it easy this weekend.” Then, at about 3:00 she sees a text from her Pastor asking that she help with a special event at church tomorrow. He writes,
Fran, I know this is a late request, but Courtney is very sick, so she’s not able to do the registration for our equipping class tomorrow. I need someone who can handle the registration process calmly and efficiently. That, of course, is you. I’m sure hoping and praying you can do it. Let me know as soon as possible. Thanks, Pastor Paul.
“Well,” Fran says to herself, “how do you say no to that? It’s certainly not Pastor’s fault that this request is so late—and it is church work, after all, so I just think I have to buck up and do it.” And so she sends a response that assures Pastor Paul she’ll be there.
Now she has to break the news to her kids and disappoint them, work late on Friday to get her Saturday chores done, and try to get a few hours sleep before heading off to church. What a week! Have you found yourself in some similar tough weeks far too often? Maybe, like Fran, you need to take a look at your need for setting some reasonable boundaries.
For Fran, her problem is a combination of trying to please everyone, enjoying the recognition she gets from being the go-to person, and feeling guilty when she has to say no. Yes, there will be times when we have to go the extra mile, but a continual habit of crossing needed boundaries will lead to burnout.
If you have trouble holding to reasonable boundaries, and you know it, perhaps you’ll consider what causes you to do that, ask God for wisdom, and then pray for his strength to stick to your boundaries. It really is the best way to live out your faith.
We’re continuing the story of Fran and Jesus on the Job. Fran is having a tough week because she is having difficulty setting boundaries. It’s Wednesday and she has just barely made a deadline for her most important client, but it was at the expense of late hours last night because she allowed a coworker to talk her into helping her for “ten minutes,” which turned into three hours. And now she is exhausted and sleepy, and she’s counting the minutes until it’s time to go home. Then in comes her manager.
“Fran, if you’re not busy tonight, I’d love for you to join me for dinner with the Vice President of Marketing, who is in town this week, you know. I’ve been telling him about your success and how much you’ve contributed to our success, and he asked if you would join us. Can you?”
Don’t do it, Fran, the inner voice of God’s Spirit seems to say to her, but how can she say no to this opportunity. So she hears herself saying, “That’s very nice of him. I, uh, I think I can make that happen. Let me make a call and I’ll get back to you.”
She calls her mom and asks if she can bring the kids over tonight for a short time. Then, when she gets home and explains to the kids that she has to go out to dinner with her boss, Drew complains, “But Mom, we agreed that you would help me with my science project tonight. You promised.”
Oops, that’s right. Now she needs to talk her parents into coming over to their house so her Dad can help Drew with his science project. It’s not convenient for them, but like Fran, they have trouble saying no, so they agree.
Well, the dinner with the Vice President wasn’t as productive as Fran had imagined. After a few drinks, he told some inappropriate stories, made some remarks that verged on sexual overtures, and it became a pretty uncomfortable situation. Fran used the excuse of getting home to her kids to exit the dinner as early as possible, but it was still after ten o’clock by the time she got home. With apologies to her parents, she tried to clean up some of the mess from the science project, get her house in decent condition, and fall into bed at midnight.
Refusing to set boundaries has consequences for yourself and for other people in your life.
Do you know when and how to set reasonable boundaries? Fran is facing some boundary issues. She has a little trouble distinguishing between what it means to go the extra mile and becoming an enabler.
It’s Tuesday and Fran has a plate full of things to get done for one of her most important clients before a deadline on Wednesday. As she digs in, a coworker walks into her office. “Hey, Fran, how’s it going?” It’s Amy, a nice gal who is a project manager like Fran, but who somehow always seems to need help from others—especially Fran! “Hi, Amy. Well, it’s going good, but I’m under the gun to meet a deadline by tomorrow. How are things going for you?”
Uh-oh, Fran thinks, that was not the best question to ask. So, Amy begins to slowly talk about a presentation she is preparing for a new prospect tomorrow, but she is stumped. “Fran, I know you’re busy, but you’re so smart and so fast, if you could just look over my presentation and give me your opinion, I would be so grateful. It won’t take you ten minutes. How about it?”
The voice in her head says, “Don’t go there, Fran. This is a time to say no.” But her exaggerated idea of what it means to “go the extra mile” overcomes her better sense, and she agrees that she can give Amy ten minutes.
What happens? Ten minutes turns into three hours, where basically Fran completely redesigns her presentation, and Amy is thrilled. “Sorry it took so long, Fran, but I know you’ll do a great job on your project. Thanks so much,” and off she goes. Now Fran has to take her work home, take time away from her family and her sleep in order to meet her own deadline.
Fran has trouble saying no. You see, Fran is a go-to person, so she likes to play the role of superwoman and she truly wants to help others. But she needs to learn where to set boundaries so she doesn’t become an enabler at times without realizing it. Fran should have listened to that quiet voice which told her to say no, but she just finds that so hard to do.
How do you come to the place where you know when to say no, when to go the extra mile, and when to draw the line in the sand and stick to your boundaries? There are no hard and fast rules here, but one thing to consider is whether or not you are becoming an enabler by refusing to say no.
Well, boundary-setting is challenging for Fran, but her attempts at being superwoman will not benefit her or her friends. So, she needs to address this issue in her life. Maybe you do as well.
Do you have difficulty setting reasonable boundaries in your life? In this episode of Fran and Jesus on the Job, Fran faces various people in her life who are pushing her boundaries. The first one deals with a friend, Jane, who continually exceeds acceptable boundaries in her demands on Fran’s time. Jane calls Fran quite often and talks for long periods of time about all her issues. You might say she is a high-maintenance friend, but Fran has tried to listen and help her, thinking that this is the right thing to do.
It’s Sunday afternoon and Fran has planned to spend a quiet day at home with her two children, just playing games with them and having fun. In the midst of a game the phone rings and Jane is on the other end.
As Fran sees Jane’s caller ID, she is really tempted to just let it go—but she’s supposed to be there for her friends, right? So, she answers and sure enough Jane begins her typical long and detailed complaining and whining.
At first, Fran tries to encourage her and offer some suggestions, but everything she says is resisted by Jane, and it seems Fran can do nothing but listen. After twenty minutes, Drew says, “Mom, aren’t we gonna finish our game?” No doubt Jane heard Drew, but she completely ignores it and continues her tirade. After another ten minutes and several pleas from Drew and Alice, Fran realizes that Jane is not going to stop anytime soon, so Fran says, “Hey, Jane, the kids and I were playing a game and I promised them we’d finish, so if you don’t mind, I need to get back to them. I’ll be praying for you. In fact, why don’t I pray for you now before we hang up?”
Jane says, “Well, I know you’re always busy and don’t have time to talk—I guess games are more important to you than friends.” And with that she hangs up, ignoring Fran’s offer to pray.
“Wow,” Fran says to herself, “I guess I should have let her keep talking—but honestly, it doesn’t do any good to listen to her. I don’t know, Lord, what am I supposed to do?” And then the false guilt starts to set in. Fran needs to take that hard step of setting some boundaries, for her sake as well as Jane’s.
Have you got some “Janes” in your life—people who continually bend your ear and take up your time, but nothing good ever seems to come from it? Maybe it’s time to set some boundaries. You see, setting boundaries is often very uncomfortable and false guilt is one of our enemies.
Presented by Lisa Bishop
There are so many areas of our lives that require courage. From changing jobs to admitting when you make a mistake, taking a risk and trying something new, staying in a friendship when it gets hard, making amends with a co-worker, or apologizing to a spouse. There is no end to the list of things and circumstances that require us to muster up courage. Courage is said to be the mental or moral strength to venture, persevere, and withstand danger, fear, or difficulty. Another way I have heard courage defined that has a bit more depth to it is this:
“Courage is the ability to face and overcome fear while prioritizing a greater objective. It is not the absence of fear but rather the determination to act despite its presence, guided by a strong sense of purpose and a commitment to achieving a higher good.”
I love this definition because it goes beyond just persevering through fear. I hear hope in it. You aren’t just mustering up the determination to push through something that causes anxiety and distress just for the sake of it; you have a greater intention and mission. You are committed to conjuring up courage because there is a greater motive, something much bigger at stake.
Several weeks ago, I watched a movie, Luther: The Fallen Sun. My friend picked it and I had no clue what the movie was about before we started watching it (otherwise I may have declined). The movie is about former Detective Chief Inspector John Luther’s pursuit of a serial killer, David Robey. David, the villain in the movie, uses in-home technology to surveil and then blackmail his victims. Somehow, he finds a way to secretly spy on what appears to be everyday ordinary people, invading their privacy. He has, unbeknownst to them, infiltrated their lives giving him a window into their deepest darkest secrets, which in the cruelest of ways he ends up using against them. He essentially capitalizes on their shame for their immoral acts. The movie is not explicit about what those acts are—they are left to the viewer’s imagination. But as I watched the diversity of those victimized by the leverage the serial killer had on them for knowing their dirt, one could surmise the misgivings committed most likely ranged from what may be considered small to greater transgressions that ended in disgrace.
You may be wondering, “What does this have to do with the connection between courage and confession?” I am glad you asked. The answer is summed up in one line in the movie. When Detective Luther is asked how the serial killer is able to commit such heinous crimes and manipulate people to take their own lives, Luther responds, “He’s probably figured out that in the right circumstances, the fear of shame, the fear of being called out, the fear of being caught is way more powerful than the fear of death.”
Now this statement may sound like an extreme example, but the truth is, the feeling of shame that is induced by the fear of our sin being exposed can destroy and torment us.
We have all experienced the weight of shame at some point in our lives. Shame is defined as, “a painful emotion caused by the awareness of having done something wrong, dishonorable or foolish.”
David Robey was the villain in the movie that caused people to be so entrenched in shame that they saw no way out, leading them to hide in isolation which was his ultimate form of manipulation. Their shame had so overcome them, that they would rather die than be exposed. Satan is your enemy, the villain in your life, and he will make every attempt to hold you hostage and in bondage to the things that you are ashamed of. The Bible says in 1 Peter 5:8-9:
“Stay alert! (other versions say be vigilant, watchful, sober-minded; meaning free from intoxicating influences). Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour. Stand firm against him, and be strong in your faith” (NLT).
The devil is looking for any way he can to shake your faith and monopolize your weaknesses. He will do anything to lure you into the trap of sin and he will use shame as a way to hold you in captivity. That is why, fellow believer, it is absolutely vital that we have the courage to confess. The courage to confess our sins and transgressions, to God, and to others. Because shame is a powerful force that will drive your life, it will cause you to hide.
Confessing our sin to other Christians is not a suggestion. James 5:16 commands, “Confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed.” While that command comes in the context of seeking healing, it also fulfills the intent of 1 John 1:6-7; “If we say we have fellowship with him while we walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin.” While walking in the light means living in the pursuit of holiness, it also includes living in transparency with others.
Well-known author Detrich Bonhoeffer writes this in his book Life Together:
“He who is alone with his sin is utterly alone…. Sin demands to have a man by himself. It withdraws him from the community. The more isolated a person is, the more destructive will be the power of sin over him, and the more deeply he becomes involved in it, the more disastrous his isolation. Sin wants to remain unknown. It shuns the light. In the darkness of the unexpressed, it poisons the whole being of a person. …And that solitude, whether it feels lonely or not, is a dangerous state. It’s dangerous because it leaves us alone with our sin…. …In confession, the light of the Gospel breaks into the darkness and seclusion of the heart….”
“In confession, the light of the Gospel breaks into the darkness and seclusion of the heart.”
We see the expression of confession from King David in Psalm 32:1-5:
Blessed is the one whose transgressions are forgiven, whose sins are covered. Blessed is the one whose sin the Lord does not count against them and in whose spirit is no deceit. When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long. For day and night, your hand was heavy on me; my strength was sapped as in the heat of summer. Then I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity. I said, “I will confess my transgressions to the Lord.” And you forgave the guilt of my sin.
We don’t know the events that led up to this song of confession, but we know that throughout David’s life, he committed many transgressions. From deceit to adultery, to murder. You may be saying, “My sin isn’t that great.” But remember what Jesus said, in Matthew 5:28, “anyone who looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” When God searches our hearts with a fine tooth comb it is not to condemn us but to protect us from getting swallowed up by sin.
As a follower of Jesus, we are called to confess, acknowledge, and admit our sins to God and to one another. Sin loses its power when we bring it into the light. Jesus took on your shame. Have the courage to confess and endure the initial pain of embarrassment or fear of being found out for the greater gain of taking hold of the grace and freedom you have been freely given in Christ.
And when you are tempted to settle for less than freedom in Christ and your flesh tries to wrestle you away from holy living remember,
The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you can endure (1 Corinthians 10:13).
You are not alone. Another thing Satan tries to convince you of is that you are the only one that struggles with sinful thoughts, words, and actions but Romans 3:23-25a (NLT) reminds us that;
Everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard. Yet God, in his grace, freely makes us right in his sight. He did this through Christ Jesus when he freed us from the penalty for our sins. For God presented Jesus as the sacrifice for sin. People are made right with God when they believe that Jesus sacrificed his life, shedding his blood.
Should we use grace as a license to sin? No. As Romans 6:1-2 instructs,
…should we keep on sinning so that God can show us more and more of his wonderful grace? Of course not! Since we have died to sin, how can we continue to live in it?
But do remember and hold tight to the truth of Romans 8:1-2;
…There is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. And because you belong to him, the power of the life-giving Spirit has freed you from the power of sin that leads to death.
Again, confession takes courage. The courage to show up and let the messiest parts of yourself be exposed and seen. Confession takes humility. Don’t let pride or fear of rejection keep you from the ultimate freedom of confession. And be discerning about who you choose to confess to. It should be someone wise and who has proven themselves trustworthy – someone who is a solid and mature follower of Jesus and will hold your confession in confidence; a pastor, a counselor, a ministry leader at your church. A cherished friend who has demonstrated they are able to hold your secret sins with non-judgment, who will remind you of your identity in Christ and who also will not let you continue to tolerate your transgressions.
No sin is too small to bring into the light. That’s part of the problem, in my opinion, we overlook what we think are minor offenses towards God but they can result in erecting tall fences between us, God, and others. Remember, you do not want to give the devil any crack or crevice where he can create a foothold. And not only confess, repent, turn the other way, and with the power of the Holy Spirit, break the sin habit.
Remember Romans 2:4;
Don’t you see how wonderfully kind, tolerant, and patient God is with you? Does this mean nothing to you? Can’t you see that his kindness is intended to lead you to repentance, to turn you from your sin?
What sin are you currently concealing? Maybe you have been lacking integrity at work. Or telling white lies, falling into pride, self-righteousness, lust, envy, gluttony, or gossip; unforgiveness, hatred, and self-pity. Perhaps you are secretly struggling with an addiction, affair, or enslavement to pornography. Even the sin we label as “small” has a way of influencing us and impacting our lives and those around us. For the past two years during my quiet time in the morning, I journal what I am grateful for, and what I am confessing. Confession is a way of casting your burdens on Jesus. It is an invitation for God to transform that part of your heart and mind that is still living in the flesh and not completely in the abundant life Jesus came to give you. Have the courage to confess because sin is a slippery slope. You were created to have life and life to the fullest in Jesus. Acknowledge your sin to God. Confide in a friend who will hold what you share in confidence, stand with you in prayer, and remind you of the grace, love, compassion, and forgiveness of Jesus. Because it is for freedom that Christ set you free. Stand firm then, confess and experience the fullness of the forgiveness and freedom that has been purchased for you on the cross.
Know that you are deeply loved and highly favored. If you are not yet a follower of Jesus and you want the freedom and grace that comes by receiving Christ as your Lord and Savior, we would love the opportunity to pray with you and connect you with resources to build your faith. Send us an email at tcww@christianworkingwoman.org. If this ministry has blessed you, we would love for you to partner with us financially so that we can to continue to bring resources to help you and others grow in your faith in Jesus Christ. You can give on our website https://christianworkingwoman.org/give/, or call our office at 630-462-0552.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Do you ever find your confidence in God wavering when life catches you off guard or things just don’t seem to make sense sometimes?
We all face times throughout our lives when trusting in God is hard. We can be tempted to wonder if God really cares about us when the circumstances we are facing are perplexing. Whether it’s a sudden loss of a job, a friend who turns their back on us, or a relationship that seemed promising goes sideways, the truth is life’s twists and turns can be confusing and they can cause you to doubt God’s faithfulness.
You can be tempted to fear that God has forgotten you and doubt that his plans for you are good. That’s when your courage to trust God needs to kick in. That may sound funny: courage to trust God? Courage has often been described as the determination to act despite the presence of fear. When I think about that definition of courage as it relates to faith, it goes something like this, “In spite of my current circumstance, I will not give in to fear. I will be determined to believe God is for me and live in such a way that shows I trust him.”
Sometimes you need to remind yourself that even when you cannot see it, God is always working in your best interest and on your behalf because he loves you.
When it comes to the courage to trust God I am reminded of Job. In the story of Job we learn that he was “blameless and upright; he feared God and shunned evil” (Job 1:1). He had ten children and was a man of great wealth. One day Satan accused him of honoring God only because God had blessed him. So, God allowed Satan to take away Job’s wealth, his children, and his health, leading Job to utter devastation and loss.
Stunningly we read that Job grieved deeply but did not accuse God of any wrongdoing (Job 1:22; 42:7-8). The life of Job demonstrates that we are often unaware of the many ways God is at work in the life of every believer. Job, even during his suffering and crying out to God, knew that God was in total control. Though he had no way of knowing why so many terrible tragedies were occurring in his life, Job never lost his faith in God, even under the most heartbreaking circumstances that tested him to his core, he demonstrated determination, courage, and trust, despite his circumstances. It’s hard to imagine losing everything we own in one day—property, possessions, and even children and not wavering in understanding that God is still in control.
What difficult and perhaps confusing circumstances are you currently facing? How will you choose to demonstrate the courage to trust God? Proverbs 16:20b says, “Blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord.”
Put your confidence, hope, and security in Jesus. He will come through.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Being a part of a healthy body of believers is essential to your spiritual growth. And when I say healthy, I do not mean perfect. One thing that can tempt you to withdraw from Christian fellowship is imperfect people. Well, we are all imperfect. You are imperfect; I am imperfect. Lord knows we are all in the process of being transformed as 2 Corinthians 3 tells us: “And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit” (2 Corinthians 3:18).
Being more and more transformed into the image of Jesus is a lifelong process. We are all works in progress. People will disappoint you and cause hurt and you will do the same, because we are all human as we strive to live in the new self that we are created for, in Christ.
And here’s the deal. God designed you for connection, you are created for community. You cannot grow in isolation. You need friends and mentors; you need companions along the journey. Being in community takes courage because relationships, deep and intimate relationships, call us to demonstrate transparency and authenticity. They require going below the surface and opening the door to vulnerability. Sharing our deepest joys, dreams, and desires and exposing our insecurities, disappointments and even our sin.
Finding genuine community will take time, so resist getting discouraged and throwing in the towel too soon. Developing enduring connection will require you to be patient as relationships form, to keep showing up and leaning in.
As you seek to build relationships, the thing to ask yourself is, “Are you the friend you’re looking for?” In other words, you can’t expect things from friendships and community that you aren’t willing to give and be yourself. If you want to be with people who are generous, selfless, kind, loving, trustworthy, reliable, or loyal, do you embody those same qualities? Sometimes we have high expectations of others when we aren’t willing to raise the bar on ourselves. And don’t wait for people to reach out to you. Make the first move! Invite someone to grab coffee or lunch. Ask them to meet up at church and sit together. It can be tempting to wait until someone seeks you out and initiates getting to know you but if everyone takes that posture…well, you get the point.
I know being in community takes courage. Maybe you have been hurt in the past. Perhaps you consider yourself to be shy and stepping out is hard. I get it. If you are not participating in Sunday worship services weekly, that is your first step. If you have been attending (and that does not mean watching online), find a way to serve; get in a small group, and look for ways to connect. Show up, contribute, participate, and pray. Have patience and ask God to bring some solid believers into your life and see how God provides. You were made for community.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Have you ever found it difficult to forgive someone? I’m guessing the answer is, “yes.” The ability to forgive, especially when you have been betrayed, mistreated, or are the victim of a heinous act can seem impossible at times. Forgiving someone when you have been deeply hurt takes courage. Courage is, “The ability to face and overcome fear while prioritizing a greater objective. It is not the absence of fear but rather the determination to act despite its presence, guided by a strong sense of purpose and a commitment to achieving a higher good.”
So, what does overcoming fear have to do with forgiveness? When someone has caused harm or hurt in our lives, we may find forgiveness difficult because we fear if we forgive them that person will in some way be off the hook for their actions. Or perhaps if we forgive, we fear that will invalidate the unsubstantiated pain someone has caused us. But when you have the courage to forgive, you are overcoming that fear for a greater objective and the greater objective is to refuse to allow unforgiveness to cause bitterness and to extend the same grace to others as Jesus extends to you for your misgivings. I know that can be hard to hear but it’s the Gospel.
I was listening to a book on forgiveness the other day and it was convicting. I squirmed a bit but also concurred with what the author was saying, even though it was hard. The author talked about how forgiveness is the absence of self-righteousness. That we tend to have no objectivity for ourselves in our own misgivings and when we see ourselves as we really are, we will realize that we are just as capable of committing any sin that others commit. I don’t want to believe that, but I will sit with it long enough to see what truth God wants to reveal to me and I invite you to do the same.
The truth is, we are saved only by God’s intervening grace. When we choose to have the courage to forgive, we don’t exact payment from other people because God didn’t exact payment from us. He gave his one and only Son to die on the cross and take on the penalty for our sins. Jesus’ ultimate forgiveness is an example for us.
When I think of an astounding example of forgiveness I think of Joseph whose brothers, out of extreme jealousy and animosity towards him, plotted to kill him in the wilderness. Ultimately Joseph’s life was spared, but he did end up getting sold into slavery in Egypt. While Joseph was eventually named supervisor of the high-ranking Egyptian Potiphar’s household, Joseph’s life was not smooth sailing. Over the course of the months ahead, he would be falsely accused of seducing Potiphar’s wife and thrown in jail and forgotten about for years until he was released and restored to a position of authority over Egypt.
He endured a lot of pain and hardship but ultimately Joseph forgives his brothers for their evil doings and all of the distress it caused him. In Genesis 50:19-21 he says, “But Joseph said to them, “Don’t be afraid. Am I in the place of God?You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives. So then, don’t be afraid. I will provide for you and your children.”
Joseph was clearly guided by a commitment to achieve a higher good, demonstrating the ultimate courage to forgive. Who is God calling you to courageously forgive? Ask him to show you and help you. Submit your hurt to him and thank him for the grace he extends to you.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
When you are facing a difficult situation and you don’t know what to do, who or what do you turn to? Is your first instinct to cry out to God? Do you attempt to figure things out on your own? Or perhaps you turn to a friend, relying on their advice? For the record, seeking the advice of wise friends is a sound thing to do as Proverbs 12:15 reminds us, “The way of fools seems right to them, but the wise listen to advice.” The thing to consider is, do you run to people before turning to God? I know I can be tempted to seek counsel from friends before sitting with the Lord. After all, it takes patience and courage to cry out to God and trust that he will hear and that his Holy Spirit will be your guide.
When I am facing uncertainty in life, one of my favorite verses to meditate on is 2 Chronicles 20:12. Here we find the story of Jehoshaphat, King of Judah, facing war being waged against him by the Ammonites and Moabites–Judah’s enemies. In the midst of a vast army coming against him, we read that Jehoshaphat resolved to inquire of the Lord before seeking the counsel of men.
““Lord, the God of our ancestors, are you not the God who is in heaven? You rule over all the kingdoms of the nations. Power and might are in your hand, and no one can withstand you. Our God, did you not drive out the inhabitants of this land before your people Israel and give it forever to the descendants of Abraham your friend?They have lived in it and have built in it a sanctuary for your Name, saying,‘If calamity comes upon us, whether the sword of judgment, or plague or famine, we will stand in your presence before this temple that bears your Name and will cry out to you in our distress, and you will hear us and save us.’…For we have no power to face this vast army that is attacking us. We do not know what to do, but our eyes are on you” (2 Chronicles 20:6-9, 12).
In the midst of uncertainty, Jehoshaphat acknowledges God’s power and authority and recalls his faithfulness as he courageously cries out, “We have no power to face this vast army that is attacking us. We do not know what to do, but our eyes are on you.”
When you face uncertainty, how do you make God your first go-to? First, be in the Word of God daily so that you are more and more convinced of the truth of God and his character. We tend to seek advice from people we trust. Do you trust the Lord? That can be a tough question. Maybe your trust wavers. If that is the case, you are not alone. That’s part of being human as you seek to grow more in your knowledge of God and encounters with Jesus and the Holy Spirit. But before you seek counsel from friends, discipline yourself to sit before God. Talk to him. Cry out. Be vulnerable and mirror the words of Jehoshaphat. “Jesus, I don’t know what to do but my eyes are on you.” As James 1:5 says, “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.”
Seeking counsel from godly people in your life is wise. Just be mindful that you are not cutting God out of the equation. Have the courage to go to him first. He is the one who sees all, knows all, and whose counsel you can always trust in.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
What do you do in the face of failure?
All of us will face varying degrees of failure throughout our lifetime and when we do, it takes courage to get up and go again; to give something another shot, and as the saying goes “if at first you don’t succeed, ….to try, try, again.” When you experience failure, how do you respond? Do you give up and throw in the towel? Maybe you’re tempted not to even take on that daunting challenge because the fear of disappointing, not measuring up, being made fun of, or looking like a fool, holds you back.
Whether it’s speaking up in a meeting, going for that promotion, or pursuing the dream God put on your heart, fear can stop you dead in your tracks. So in the face of fear, what you need is courage. I recently heard a definition of courage that resonated with me.
“Courage is the ability to face and overcome fear while prioritizing a greater objective. It is not the absence of fear but rather the determination to act despite its presence, guided by a strong sense of purpose and a commitment to achieving a higher good.”
Courage is the determination to act in spite of fear because there is something greater at stake.
It reminds me of the well-known story of Peter in Matthew 14:22-31. It’s the scene where Jesus walks on water as he makes his way towards the disciples who are in a boat a considerably far distance from land. The waves are crashing, the wind is blowing furiously, and the disciples, thinking they are seeing a ghost, cry out in terror and fear.
“But Jesus immediately said to them: “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.”“Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.”“Come,” he said. Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!”Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?” (Matthew 14:27-31).
But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and began to sink. Fear will try to sink you. Don’t let fear of failure keep you from stepping out of the boat. When you hear that voice telling you to back off and shrink back, be determined to act anyway. And when you find yourself failing at something (because you will) your first instinct may be to give up but resist the urge and instead press on! Push through the fear for the greater objective. Don’t let fear define you. You may fail from time to time but you are not a failure.
Is there something you have been avoiding doing up until now because of fear? What fear is gripping and controlling your decision making? Instead of letting fear pin you down, take that first step, press on, persevere, and learn to put fear in its proper place. And if you fumble, get back up and try again. Jesus will reach out his hand and help you get up and go again.
Mary Lowman and Lisa Bishop have a conversations about how one holds fast to their faith in today’s workplace. They offer practical advice and encouragement to walk out your faith in love in a “defensive” environment.
The Apostle Paul tells us in Romans 13 that we are to submit to and respect those who are in authority, because authority is God’s order and plan. But how do you respect and submit to someone in authority who is incompetent?
Smart employees understand that their job description includes making your boss look good. First Corinthians 13 describes the kind of love we are to develop in our lives, a love that is like God’s love. And that kind of love “does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
As Christians we should try to make our bosses look good because God’s love motivates us to protect others from bad exposure, to delight in the good things they do, not the bad things, to try to cover up their mistakes whenever we can.
Proverbs 17:9 says, “Whoever would foster love covers over an offense, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends.” It’s likely if you work for a truly incompetent boss that everyone else feels the same way you do, and therefore, at lunch and on breaks that’s what you talk about. Instead of covering up the offense, you repeat the matter and make the situation much worse.
If you work for an incompetent boss, stop talking about him or her to other people. Pray for that boss; talk to the Lord; get counsel from respected Christians outside the company. But don’t be a part of the office gossip and character assassination which usually happens when you have this type of boss.
Should we ever confront an incompetent boss or take any steps to try to correct this kind of situation? Yes, if that person’s incompetence is affecting the customers, or causing unfair treatment for employees, or doing things that are contrary to your organization’s stated standards and policies. If you’re convinced there is a larger picture, then confrontation may be advisable. But, again, this must be done with great respect for their authority.
This kind of situation is simply not easy, I know, but the good news is, it should cause you to pray more and depend upon God more to get you through your days and respond appropriately. The good news is, because of Jesus you have the power to be victorious, even when you work for a difficult boss.
If you’ve been in the business world very long, it’s likely you’ve run into a manager who just wasn’t doing the job right. We need to know biblical principles in dealing with incompetent or unethical bosses.
Someone once told me that you can learn as much from an incompetent or bad manager as you can from a good one, and I think that’s probably true. But the learning is more difficult and painful! I’ve heard many sad stories of trying to work for a boss who is either lazy, disorganized, inexperienced, or unqualified for the job or who cuts too many corners.
The first biblical principle we need to consider is our attitude toward those in authority. While we recognize that level or position does not make anyone better than anyone else, Romans 13 gives us clear teaching on authority.
“Let everyone be subject to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God.Consequently, whoever rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves” (Romans 13:1-2).
God has established authority as the order for the universe. If it were not for the principle of authority, we would have nothing but chaos. The same is true in our business world. Authority is essential.
Therefore, the people in positions of authority are part of God’s plan for authority. And as Christians, we are directed to submit ourselves to those people who have risen to those authority positions.
But we see so much evidence that many people in authority are neither godly nor competent. Can their authority be God-given? Yes, even though they may not use their position well or appropriately, their authority is nonetheless from God, and as Christians we are to respect it. To rebel against that is to rebel against God’s order, and, Paul said, it will bring judgment on us.
Obviously, we’re going to need special grace and strength to be able to submit to and respect incompetent management.
I wonder if you have ever been confronted with unethical practices by your employer? That’s a tough spot to be in. What should you do?
Well, let’s begin by saying that if the product or service your organization is engaged in is not contributing to the good of society by providing a worthwhile end product, you need to question seriously if God wants you in that company. As Christ-followers, we are called to be in this world, but not of it. For example, being employed by the lottery commission or a sleazy magazine would place you in the position of helping a product that brings destruction and grief into our society.
I can’t believe that Jesus would want us to expend our time and gain our financial support from such goods or services. They may not be illegal, but certainly they are not edifying or positive forces in our communities. There are any number of these kinds of industries that we should avoid, and the criteria is simply to determine if the company provides a product or service that helps rather than harms.
Now, suppose you work for a firm that is providing a good service, but you are aware of unethical practices that are allowed or encouraged. Maybe hours are billed to the client which were not actually worked and expenses are charged which were not incurred. As a Christian, what action should you take?
Well, if you were asked to exaggerate your hours or expenses, your response is clear-cut. A Christian should never be part of lying or deception of any kind. You have to draw clear black and white lines in your behavior in situations like this.
Of course, when you take these difficult stands, you want to do it with as little fanfare as possible, and as gently as you can. If you don’t have to say anything at all, that is best. Just do what is right and let it go. But if you’re told to do something unethical, or asked why you didn’t, that’s when you must be willing to say that you have done what you believe is right and accurate and you’re not willing to falsify a report of any type.
A friend of mine lost his job once because he refused to falsify a government report for his employer. He was unemployed for a few months, and it looked dim. But the Lord blessed him, and he eventually found a much better job in a firm that was very ethical.
Recently someone asked me how to deal with a boss who uses belittling and humiliating tactics. You may have found yourself in that type of situation. As Christians, we need careful thought and guidance to act and react according to biblical principles.Remember to make this person an object of concentrated, daily prayer and see how prayer changes your perspective and your attitude. Now, it may be that the changes in your attitude, brought about by prayer, will actually cause the other person's attitude and tactics to change. If you're resenting the treatment, feeling misused and abused, chances are your reactions to this person are making the problem worse. Once you get out of that chain of thinking and begin focusing on God's purpose in the situation, it may so change your behavior, that it will affect the other person as well.However, let me hasten to say that it may not, and you may be faced with a situation where confrontation is called for. However, before you confront, be certain that you check out your motives carefully. Are you simply trying to be vindictive? Are you reacting out of self-pity? Are you fighting for your rights? Those are not biblically-based motivations. Jesus frequently confronted people, but he always did it for their own good, not to vindicate himself.That confrontation will have to be bathed in prayer and God's wisdom, done at the right time in the right way. Please don't over-react, and don't confront when you're emotionally upset.You may start with something like: "I wonder if I could ask a consideration of you. You're probably not aware of it, but it seems that often you choose to give me criticism and negative feedback when it is the most embarrassing. I know that I need feedback, but could I ask you to do it privately?” Be prepared to cite dates and situations, for most people will deny that it is happening.And remember that biblical principles teach us to go the extra mile, to endure unfair and unkind treatment much longer than others would. I would refer you to Matthew 5 to see what Jesus had to say about taking unfair treatment.You know, God may have good purposes for leaving you in that unfair situation for a period of time. Perhaps others are watching you and if you respond in a Christ-like way, that could be a very effective witness. God has a right to use us in these ways, and we must be willing to allow him to do so.
What you do when your boss is wrong? Because managers and employers are people, like you and me, sometimes they are wrong. They may be wrong in their attitudes, wrong in their management techniques, wrong in their tactics, wrong occasionally, wrong all the time–but it happens! What do you do when your boss is wrong?For example, how should a Christian respond in a situation when a boss belittles you? Unfortunately, this is a fairly common occurrence in our business worlds, where a boss gives negative feedback in front of other people or makes fun of you in some way. Or there’s the boss who always manages to find something wrong in everything you do, and he or she tells you about it in a meeting, or loudly standing at your desk. It's humiliating and belittling.Our first human reaction in cases like this is usually either to resist and strike back, or to be intimidated and retreat or run away. Neither reaction is proper. When any person tends to belittle other people frequently, we should understand that it is a symptom of insecurity. Underneath the intimidating facade is a person who can only feel good about himself or herself by making someone else look small.A Christian needs to learn to move from the self-focused reaction which is typical in these situations–"Oh, poor me, this is not fair to me"–to a God-focused reaction, understanding how God sees this person. And that comes only through prayer. Start praying for that boss.Now, I don't mean that you pray for lightning to strike your boss, but pray that God will give you his perspective of this person. Pray that God will help you see beneath the facade and get a glimpse of why he or she is like that. Pray that in spite of the unfair treatment, you will be able to respond in Christ-like ways, and ask God for his wisdom.You know, every person in your life is there through God's permissive will, and that means that God can turn the tough situation into an avenue of growth and learning for you, even if the other person never changes.So, my first advice is to pray for that boss every day before you leave for work. And pray for wisdom. James tells us that God will give wisdom to us liberally, and in a situation like this, you need a lot of godly wisdom. So, pray for wisdom—and expect God to give you the wisdom you need.You will be amazed to see what happens when you start to pray for that difficult manager.
Courage comes in different forms. There is physical courage where you are willing to do something physical that could cause you harm. Like jumping into a pool to save a little child who can’t swim or putting yourself in harm’s way to protect someone else. Then there’s emotional courage which means you face your emotions head on without running away or using some addiction to kill the pain. Social courage is the strength to stand up for what you believe, for your principles, and to stand up for others even when it is risky.There are three women in the New Testament who were very courageous. We don’t know a lot about them, but I sense these were very usual women who were willing to take risks. We first read about them in Luke 8:After this, Jesus traveled about from one town and village to another, proclaiming the good news of the kingdom of God. The Twelve were with him, and also some women who had been cured of evil spirits and diseases: Mary (called Magdalene) from whom seven demons had come out; Joanna the wife of Chuza, the manager of Herod’s household; Susanna; and many others. These women were helping to support them out of their own means (Luke 8:1 – 3).The three names we are given are Mary Magdalene, Joanna, and Susanna. These women—along with many others—were devoted followers of Jesus Christ. And no wonder! Jesus had cured them of evil spirits and diseases. They knew he was worthy of their devotion because of what he had done for them. And so, in a world that was misogynistic, strongly prejudiced against women, and where women had very little rights and certainly little influence, these women decided to follow Jesus and there was no turning back.Consider Mary Magdalene. We know she had been delivered from seven demons. It’s not easy for us today to understand what that was like, but no doubt Mary Magdalene had lived a life of torment. Who knows what things she had to suffer while possessed by seven demons?Further in Luke 8 we are told of a man named Legion who was possessed by even more demons, and his behavior gives us some insight into the life of a demon-possessed person in that day (Luke 8: 26-39). He was driven to the outskirts of the city where he would have episodes of rage, and no one could stop him. They forced him to live in caves and chained him down, but nothing worked. Everyone had given up on him and no one came near. Then Jesus delivered him from those horrific demons and turned this demon-possessed man into a disciple—an evangelist.For Mary Magdalene, no doubt she was isolated, even feared because of her unusual behavior. We don’t know how long she lived like this but try to imagine living under the control of demons, causing you to do and say things that were terrible, scary, resulting in no friends, no support group, no help and no hope. Tormented by demons, looked down upon by society, she was a true outcast.But Jesus. Oh, if those aren’t two of the most powerful words when put together. But Jesus. Jesus set her free and totally changed her world. She followed Jesus, literally, walking behind him and the twelve disciples as they made their way through the land. I’m certain she shared her story with any who would listen, telling how Jesus had delivered her. She had the courage to face the gossip, the skepticism, the derision of others who knew her before, and stand up for who she was now.Maybe you can relate to that. You may not have had seven demons, but you had besetting sin. You may have struggled and suffered, but the grace of our Lord finally broke in. He saved you, just as he is saving all those who follow him. Do you have the courage to share your story? Have you made it known that you are following Jesus, no turning back? That takes courage but if you have a story of redemption to tell, believe me there are many people all around you who need to hear it. People you live with, people you work with, people you’ve known for years, strangers you just met.
Is it a Christian's duty to be "dumped on"? Surely there are times when we must recognize the need to say, "Enough!” Maybe you are in that kind of situation at this time.If you've extra-miled it, and you've been giving not only your cloak but your whole wardrobe away, it's time to stop and ask yourself how many extra miles you should go. Jesus doesn't call us to be doormats, to simply lay down and allow people to run over us. And if you just let it continue, you'll lose respect for yourself, others will lose respect for you, and eventually you'll explode somewhere to someone inappropriately.But as you think about your own particular situation, the first question you must honestly answer is "Did I go the first extra mile?” In this society, where we fight tooth and nail for our individual rights, being dumped on is not acceptable in any measure. But Matthew 5 teaches us this principle of doing more than is asked of us, more than others would say is necessary. Whatever form that extra mile takes, we've got to travel the extra mile first, before we take any other action.For those of you who are extra-milers, I want to thank you and I want to encourage you not to quit. Address the out-of-control situations that exist—yes—but don't crawl back into that shell of "I'll just do what I have to and nothing more."There's no question that it's possible to go too many extra miles, to become a doormat and allow that treatment to make you bitter and angry. And with that attitude, it's impossible to truly love and care about others and to share the love of Christ with the people in our worlds.But we must remember that we are called to be servants, and sometimes that requires allowing others to "dump on us.” Jesus certainly practiced that principle, and he warned us that in this world we will suffer persecution. But be encouraged, he said, because he has overcome the world.
Been dumped on lately? While there are times when we are called on to endure unfair treatment patiently and wait for God's timing, there are also times when we know that God would have us take some kind of a stand against this kind of treatment.If you feel you're in that position, after much prayer and patience, then remember these guidelines: Don't take assertive, confrontational action when you're emotional, upset, angry, or tired. Don’t confront someone else's behavior when others are present. Do it privately. Plan your approach. Write it out ahead of time so that you choose your words carefully. Even though you're not going to read your speech, by writing it out you will choose your words much more carefully. Take a few notes with you to help you remember. Soften the blow. Choose words that will not cause a defensive reaction on the part of the other person, as much as you possibly can. Try not to issue ultimatums. "Sweetness of speech increases persuasiveness," as we read in Proverbs 15, so make your words as palatable as Don't talk about the situation to everyone else. Keep this between you and the person you're confronting as much as possible. Be careful not to get in a mode of maligning and degrading that person to others. Try to create a "win-win" atmosphere in your conversation. Point out the benefits for everyone involved. Be sure your timing is right. Avoid very busy days or times when the other person is upset or tired or preoccupied with other things. Most importantly, give this decision much prayer and seek counsel from trusted advisors.Remember, when we are emotionally involved in a situation, it can be difficult for us to see the forest because we're looking at the trees. We sometimes need the perspective of others who are more objective.
What should a Christian do when being dumped on? We've seen that Jesus sets out principles for us in Matthew 5 that teach us to be willing to be dumped on at times—turn the other check, give your coat as well as your shirt, go the extra mile. But does that mean that we are supposed to endure unfair, unjust treatment without end?Let's look at those principles in Matthew 5 again. It seems to me that while Jesus is teaching us to turn the other cheek and go the extra mile, he is also teaching us that there are limits. He said if someone strikes you, turn your other cheek, but he didn't say lay down on the ground and let him run over you with a truck. He said if you're sued for a tunic, give a cloak as well, but he didn't say to throw in your whole wardrobe. He said if you're asked to go one mile, go two, but he didn't say go fifteen extra miles.But how do we know the difference? Well, one way is through prayer. Begin by asking God for clear guidance, pray for the people involved, pray for patience and endurance, and pray that God will be glorified through the situation. That will change your perspective and keep you from running ahead of God's plan. Remember, he's working in the background, doing things you'd never dream of, but you can trust him explicitly.Another way we can determine when enough is enough is to determine if we are actually doing the other person a disservice by allowing him or her to continue to dump on us. There are points at which going too many extra miles would be wrong for others as well as for ourselves—the point at which we become enablers of their evil behavior.If you're being dumped on right now, ask yourself: Am I allowing this person to get by with behavior that is detrimental not only to me but to others as well? By continuing to be dumped on, am I reinforcing this poor behavior in this other person? And is this situation causing me to become bitter or burned out or resentful so that my testimony is damaged?Maybe you're in a situation where it's now time to take some action. Certainly we see examples in Scripture, even of our Lord, when godly people took strong stands against unfair and unjust treatment, but not for their sakes alone. I find this to be a clear principle by example in the Bible, that when we take assertive stands simply for our own advantage, we are acting selfishly and usually in anger. However, when we take assertive action to right a wrong, to take a stand against sin or evil, for the sake of righteousness more than to vent our frustration, then we are acting in accordance with biblical principles.
Is someone taking unfair advantage of you? I can't think of anything more frustrating and humiliating, can you? What is an appropriate Christian response when you find yourself being dumped on?Jesus set out principles in Matthew 5 of allowing people to take advantage of us. Let me give you one example that happened to a friend of mine on her job. She took a new position within her organization, and she encountered a coworker who tried to advance herself at my friend's expense. This coworker began a campaign of lies and treacheries in order to make herself look good while making my friend look bad. This coworker played the political games and worked her way into the confidence of management, convincing them that my friend was not doing her job.My friend really struggled with this, because she always tried to make her job performance reflect her love for Jesus, and the lies were damaging her reputation. She found it impossible to defend herself because it was her coworker's word against hers. For two years she endured this situation, constantly seeking God's wisdom. And each time she prayed, the Lord gave her the same answer: "Wait.” Now, that's not the answer we want to hear when someone is dumping on us, is it?But during this period, my friend determined to pray for her attacker and let the Lord defend her. After two years this coworker became seriously ill and my friend was left to do the job alone. After four months her boss nominated her as Employee of the Month for the entire very large department. He came to understand what kind of an employee my friend truly was, and she was totally vindicated. No one dumped on her after that.So, you see, sometimes God is working behind the scenes, and when we desire to obey him and live by the principles of Matthew 5, we open up great avenues of blessing that God can pour on us.If you're being dumped on right now, before you do anything to correct it or get out of it or get your pound of flesh, will you first do what my friend did and pray to God for guidance. Instead of begging him to change the situation, ask him to work his will in it, both for you and everyone involved. Ask him to teach you what you need to learn through this ordeal. Give him permission to keep you in that predicament as long as it can bring glory to him. And then, let go and wait for his direction. You'll know when it's time to take action.
I received a question from a listener who asked: “What is a loving Christian way of dealing with work issues in which one feels ‘dumped on’?” She went on to say that as a nurse, she occasionally works charge duty, a job no one really likes. Because others protest their turn at being charge nurse for the shift, she ends up working far more than she should. She said, “It’s high pressure, very tiring and I find myself getting angry at the inequity. How should one address such a grievance—short of simply burning out and quitting?”
Well, she poses a good question: Are Christians supposed to be doormats? This is what Jesus said in Matthew 5:
“You have heard that it was said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also. And if anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your coat as well. If anyone forces you to go one mile, go with them two miles” (Matthew 5:38-41).
It might be easy to read this passage and think that Jesus is teaching us to let people take advantage of us. Is that true? Well, I think the answer has to be “yes.” To turn the other cheek, to relinquish your rights, to voluntarily do more than is demanded is, in the world’s perspective, to allow others to take advantage of you. And most people have a difficult time swallowing that pill.
But one of the distinguishing marks we bear as Christians in a world consumed with getting what’s coming to them and taking care of number one, is a willingness to go the extra mile, even to the point of someone taking advantage of us.
In studying Genesis, I was reminded of how Isaac was taken advantage of. He dug some wells that his father, Abraham, had dug and then his enemy came along and said, “Hey, that’s our well. Move on.” That happened to him twice, and he could have started a war over the wells; he certainly had a right to those wells and had done all the dirty work to dig them. I imagine the enemy thought he was a pushover because he refused to fight for his wells.
But eventually God gave him the best well in the best location, and blessed him abundantly, much more than his enemies. Isaac was willing to wait on God’s timing and purpose, even if it meant being dumped on.
Is someone dumping on you? Ask God to give you patience and endurance to withstand it with gentleness. But maybe not forever.
The first woman I’d like you to meet is a woman who was not—as far as we know—a believer in the true God. She was not Jewish but rather Persian. In fact, she was married to the Persian King Ahasuerus, who was a wimpy, weak, narcissistic man. Most Christians are familiar with the story of Esther—the courageous Jewish Queen who God used to save her people. But what about her predecessor, Queen Vashti? Do you know her story? It’s in the first chapter of the book of Esther.
In a drunken stupor and at the end of a five-day drunken feast, the king had a brilliant idea to bring down the house with a final display of his superiority. He commanded his servants to summon the prized Queen Vashti decked in her royal crown, so that he could show off her beauty. It is probably true that she was summoned to appear naked, with just her crown on.
Vashti refused to appear and that enraged the king—his own wife was defying him in front of all the men of Susa. The royal wise men advised the king that Vashti’s humiliating behavior could not go unpunished because, if the king let the incident slide, all the women in the kingdom would have contempt for their husbands, thinking, “If Queen Vashti can get away with disrespecting her husband, so can I” (verses 16–18).
King Ahasuerus responded to the situation by sending out a royal edict saying that Queen Vashti was never to be allowed to come before him again, and the king would give her crown to another. So Queen Vashti was banished, and a search began for a new queen to replace her.
And why was Vashti vanquished? Why did she lose her title, her position as “first lady” and all the wealth and privileges that came with it? We aren’t told why, but what do you think would cause a Queen in that culture to refuse to obey the King? She had to know it would cost her the crown, but she refused to be paraded before drunken men just to show off her body.
Her refusal is truly amazing. Whatever her reason, it took great courage. Beauty and wealth were considered the most important things in that culture. The King was wealthy, Vashti was beautiful. She could have simply accepted her position and used her beauty as her “calling card,” but she refused.
Listen again to what the Bible says is more important than riches and beauty:
Proverbs 22:1: A good name is more desirable than great riches; to be esteemed is better than silver or gold.
Proverbs 31:30: Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
Can you think of any parallel situations we might encounter in our culture today? What compromises could be asked or even demanded of us that would be in opposition to our faith and the principles of Scripture which are our guidelines?
As we watch our culture slide quickly into a godless secular culture; as we see how the things considered virtues even a few short years ago are now passe; at what point will you and I have to decide whether we will take our stand against what is wrong regardless of the cost? I think it’s important that we think in advance, so that if and when we are faced with such choices, we will be grounded in the truth of God’s Word and have the courage to make a “Vashti choice,” to stick with God’s truth regardless.
In a very enlightening article from Breakpoint Daily on transgender issues and the use of transgender pronouns, they point out that Christians should avoid unnecessary offense whenever possible, and I certainly agree with that. But the article continues: “And we should know that calling males men and females women will not in and of itself resolve the thorny cultural, psychological, and spiritual challenge of transgender ideology. Still, caving on words will destroy our ability to understand and undermine our ability to debate the issue truthfully. And it is truth, not niceness or relevance or even hospitality, that can set people free.”
I recognize that there are different responses from Christians on this issue, but the truth of Scripture is our final word, and the day is coming—the day has come—when we must decide if we will be courageous enough to stand with God’s truth. Vashti could have reasoned that it was just one night, one request, and what’s the big deal anyway? Just get it over with, go with the flow, and don’t cause an uproar. But she chose to be courageous and do what she knew to be right, regardless of the cost.
Though she had no way to know the ultimate result of her decision, God used it to put a Jewish woman in her place as Queen and through her to save his people from destruction. And that introduces us to the second very courageous woman, Esther. Their stories are intertwined. Because Esther was very beautiful, she was chosen to replace Vashti.
Esther could never have imagined why God would allow her, a Jewish girl, to become a Persian Queen. That wasn’t what she wanted to be when she grew up! But there she was, and in that place, she was able to take a courageous stand that saved the Jewish people—her people—who were refugees in Persia, from annihilation. It’s a wonderful, amazing story and if you’re not familiar with it, please read the short book of Esther for the whole story.
But at one point, Esther had to decide whether or not she would put her life at risk and go before the King to rescue her people. She knew the king had the power to destroy her for coming into his presence without an invitation. But she also knew there was no time to waste, so this was her decision:
Esther 4:16: “Go, gather together all the Jews who are in Susa, and fast for me. Do not eat or drink for three days, night or day. I and my attendants will fast as you do. When this is done, I will go to the king, even though it is against the law. And if I perish, I perish.”
She got her support group around her, no doubt she prayed during those three days of fasting, and then she counted the cost, knowing she could perish, but also knowing it was the right thing to do. God had put her in that spot “for such a time as this,” she said, and she courageously did the right thing.
Was she afraid? I’m sure she was. You see, being courageous doesn’t mean you have no fear. Courage recognizes fear and acts anyway. Fear is a primal emotion—it just happens and threatens to overtake you in any given moment. We are not immune to fear as Christ-followers, but we have been given the tools to conquer fear through our faith in Jesus.
You’re not likely to have to take a stand like Vashti or Esther, but what kind of things might you face which require courage:
- When telling the truth would get you in trouble and no one would ever know if you didn’t tell the truth, would you tell the truth anyway?
- When faced with criticism and misunderstanding from people who know and may even love you, would you hold fast to your biblical convictions even if the relationship is damaged?
- When a difficult conversation with a friend or a spouse or a boss is needed, even though it would be easier to shrink back, would you confront?
- If you are wrestling with a pattern of sin or addictive behavior, would you take the courageous step to bring it into the light and maybe talk about it with a trusted friend when it seems to be so much easier to just keep it hidden in shame and darkness?
- When asked by your company or your supervisor to do or say something that is not accurate, to complete a form deceptively, to make a presentation that is not truthful, would you refuse to do it even at the risk of losing your job?
There are so many challenges we face in our everyday lives that require courage. God’s Word is full of encouragement and strength for us when we face our everyday fears. There are over 365 references to fear and courage in the Bible, one for each day of the year. Here is a good one:
God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging (Psalm 46:1 – 3).
The truth of God’s Word is what you need to face the fear you feel. That’s one good reason to read it, know it, and memorize it. When the disciples were frightened when they saw Jesus walking on the water, he said to them, “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.” Take the courage Jesus is offering you today—his courage, his strength. You’re not on your own. Jesus said “It is I”; he is with you, so take his courage for whatever you are facing, and through Christ, conquer your fear to do what he wants you to do.
Do you ever wonder if you would be brave enough to declare your allegiance to Jesus Christ no matter what the cost, even if it cost your life? It’s not too far-fetched to think of how that could happen to us in our world today. Indeed, it is happening to Christians in many places in this world. But you don’t need to worry about those what-ifs. God will give you grace to do the right thing when you need it. It is our responsibility to be prepared as we read in Jude (verses 20-21):
But you, dear friends, by building yourselves up in your most holy faith and praying in the Holy Spirit, keep yourselves in God’s love as you wait for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ to bring you to eternal life.
So, let’s keep building ourselves up in our faith, praying in the Holy Spirit, and trusting God for the courage we will need, no matter what comes across our paths.
I’ve learned that any time you talk about forgiveness, it resonates with almost everyone, because we all need to forgive, and it’s really hard to do sometimes!
I want to explain why you can’t afford not to forgive. Whether it’s a small thing or some traumatic hurt that has left deep scars, you cannot afford not to forgive.
And here’s the main reason: If you don’t forgive, God won’t forgive you. Jesus said:
“For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins” (Matthew 6:14-15).
If we forgive, we will be forgiven. And conversely, if we do not forgive people that have wronged us, we will not be forgiven by our Heavenly Father. I don’t know how to expand or explain that any further. If we forgive, we’ll be forgiven; if we don’t, we won’t.
Now, how important is it to you to be freely forgiven by God? Can you run the risk of not being forgiven regularly by the Lord?
Another reason we really must forgive is that if you don’t, you will become bitter and bitterness will destroy you. And bitterness manifests itself in many ways, such as losing your temper, irritability, sleeplessness, depression, a constant negative perspective, and generally not feeling so good.
Forgiveness is probably the hardest thing we are asked—no, we are commanded—to do as followers of Jesus Christ. But you can learn to forgive; by the power of the Holy Spirit you can grow in your ability to forgive. That is, if you want to.
And one last reason you can’t afford not to forgive is because you need the freedom that comes through forgiveness. You know, when you harbor unforgiveness and bitterness starts to grow in your heart, it’s like drinking rat poison and then expecting the rat to die. The poison of your unforgiveness is keeping you a prisoner. You’re in a self-imposed prison that is painful.
Galatians 5:1 says “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.” Forgiveness sets you free to enjoy the abundant life that Christ died to give you. There are many reasons you cannot afford not to forgive and God will give you the grace to do it.
Are you feeling anxious about something? Are you very disturbed over a situation in your life? Does it seem impossible to find any rest and peace right now? Recently a passage in Isaiah 48 gave me some insight into the reasons behind the anxiety and unrest that I was experiencing.
“This is what the Lord says—your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: “I am the Lord your God, who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go. If only you had paid attention to my commands, your peace would have been like a river, your well-being like the waves of the sea” (Isaiah 48:17-18).
How incisively the Word of God cuts through and exposes the real issues. I was reminded that anxiety and unrest are often a result of my failure to pay attention to what I know about God. Rarely do I need some new truth or principle to help me out; I just need to practice what I know already.
God’s direction and commands are there for all of us to see and understand. We know the basics, don’t we? And yet our feet tend to stray. We leave off something here and something else there, which we know we should be doing, and we fail to completely follow the commands of God which are clearly understood.
I find that I rarely make a deliberate decision to wander from God’s principles. It’s simply a failure to pay attention to what I know already. My focus becomes fractured. I move slightly off-center, simply because I haven’t paid attention like I should.
And when that happens, the results are loss of peace, loss of rest, anxiety, frustration. When you start to dig underneath those outward effects, you often discover that the cause is failure to pay attention to God’s commands. It may be something that seems very small, but if you walk away from doing it God’s way, you can expect to lose the peace and rest you so need.
The Lord told his people, “If only you had paid attention to my commands, your peace would have been like a river.” If you’re missing peace in your life, check out the obedience department and see if there’s some area where you’re not paying attention to God. Once you get that straightened out, that wonderful, marvelous, indescribable peace will return, like a river, flooding your heart and calming your nerves.
In Psalm 19 David asked God to forgive him for his hidden errors, and I suggest that we need to do the same thing—to ask God to show us any hidden sins we just don’t see. But what about those areas of sin that we try to hide? When we knowingly cover up sin in our lives, we are asking for trouble.
Proverbs 28:13 tells us that he who conceals his sins does not prosper, but whoever confesses and renounces them finds mercy. I believe with all my heart that many Christians are floundering and ineffective for Jesus because they try to conceal their sins. It’s one thing to have errors in our life that are hidden to us, but it’s a far more serious problem for us to try to cover up our errors.
Think right now: Are you finding it difficult to prosper in what you’re doing? Now, by prosper I don’t mean get rich, but I mean find success. How’s your job going? Are you prospering in your work? Are your relationships prospering, doing well? Is your ministry for Jesus going forward and making progress?
If not, check it out. If you’re covering up some sin in your life, you are asking for failure. God cannot bless us when we cover-up. God will not be involved in cover-ups. God will expose our cover-ups if we continue to try to hide them.
Someone has said that rarely do any of us change without pain, and I guess that’s true. But it shows we’re not very smart, doesn’t it? I mean, if you know that you can’t prosper by covering up your sin, and you know that God will deal with it if you don’t, doesn’t it just make sense to confess that sin, renounce it and find God’s mercy? The Bible says if we judge ourselves we will not be judged.
Do yourself one big favor: Uncover those cover-ups. Confess to God any areas of willful sin, and ask for his mercy. Commit to him that you are renouncing that sin and by his grace you will not return to it. When you do that, God is then able to prosper you in everything you do and in all your relationships. Just makes good common sense, doesn’t it?
I’m quite certain that you know how important it is for Christ-followers to pray and yet not too many of us make it a priority in our lives. Why not?
Well, for one reason, we don’t plan to pray. It’s not on our to-do list; it’s not part of our daily schedule. I can promise you that Satan will do everything he can to keep you from praying because your power comes through prayer. So, if you don’t intentionally plan to pray, you probably won’t pray very much. Do you have a certain time set aside to pray each day?
Another reason you may not pray like you should is because you don’t really believe it makes any difference. You know God is sovereign, so how do your prayers change anything? And besides, maybe you’ve had many prayers that weren’t answered according to your timetable or the way you wanted them answered. So, you may have lost faith in prayer. But can you remember that Jesus prayed while on earth—a lot! He knew that prayer was important in his life, so how can we question our need to pray.
But in my opinion, one of the main reasons Christians don’t make prayer a priority in their lives is because they’ve never learned how to pray. The disciples asked Jesus to teach them how to pray. Have you ever asked God for the same thing? Have you ever looked at prayers in the Bible and patterned your prayers after them. Have you ever taken The Lord’s Prayer—more accurately called The Disciple’s Prayer—and used that as your format for praying?
Years ago I did that and it revolutionized my prayer life. In fact, I produced a journal similar to the one I use, and you can get one for yourself. It’s available on our website, and perhaps it might help you learn to pray more effectively.
I hope you will get serious—if you haven’t already—about becoming proficient in prayer—learning to pray more effectively. You will never regret it.
Have you ever said: “Lord, it’s enough! When are you going to do something about this? Why are you waiting so long?” Well, I don’t know anyone who hasn’t asked those questions of God at some time or another in their Christian walk. I certainly have.
When it looks as though God has waited too long to answer your prayers, you need to stop and realize that his purposes may be quite different from yours. Frequently before he responds to your need, he has to adjust you to the trouble and help you learn a much-needed lesson. Maybe he wants to teach you that you can face and endure trouble as long as he is with you in the trouble. Then he will take you out of it. But it will not happen until you have stopped being restless and fretful about it. He may be waiting for you to be calm and quiet. Then he can say, “It is enough.”
Paul Billheimer wrote in Adventures in Adversity: “There can be no testing of character without delays…By this means, during delay, God is testing and developing character. It is easy to be impatient with God when we fail to understand the purpose of his delay. However, God is willing to be misunderstood in the universe he has made, in order to achieve his purpose of character development.”
I recall a three-year delay God gave me, when I so wanted to leave a job I was in. And if I had left when I wanted to, I would have missed three years of personal development that have been essential to my walk with God and the ministry he has given me. The tough lessons I learned then molded my character like none others.
When it was finally over, I wrote in my journal: “I praise you that it is now enough. My time in this job is over, but I praise you that it did not end until you had completed your work in me.” It’s easy to say that at the end, but difficult to say it in the middle, isn’t it?
If you’re in that predicament, wondering why God hasn’t done anything yet, try to remember that the day will come when you can look back and see how he was developing you in that time. Someday he’ll say to you, “It is enough now.” Until then, keep trusting and believing that he waits so that he can be gracious unto you.
Presented by Lisa Bishop
We all know the saying, “The struggle is real.” Well, the wilderness is real too. If you have been following Jesus for any length of time you know what the wilderness is like, and if you have not yet hit a wilderness patch, you will. It is part of life here on earth. And rather than wishing it away, I want you to know how to “wander well” so to speak.
When I was reflecting on the story of the Israelites in the desert, something struck me. They thought they were wandering. Their perspective of their journey was that it was aimless, endless, and meaningless, but it wasn’t. God had a magnificent plan. While the Israelites saw their wilderness time as wandering, we know that God had a greater purpose. They just couldn’t see it at the time. In my 26 years of following Jesus, I have experienced several seasons of wilderness. And if I am honest, sometimes they have been very long seasons that I thought would never end. But in hindsight, like the Israelites, I can see that there was purpose and God kept his promise. “For the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you” (Deuteronomy 31:6b). In other words, God is right there with you, even when you feel as though he has abandoned you, he hasn’t. He is right by your side.
So while it may feel like you are idling with no clear purpose or direction, I want to shift your perspective on the seemingly endless seasons of your life; from pointless, to purposeful, and give you some tools to not just merely survive the wilderness waiting for it to pass but to actually experience the wilderness as a place to grow and boost your spiritual thriving. As a follower of Jesus, you will experience times in the proverbial desert. The question is, “When you are in the wilderness seasons, what will you do, what or who will you turn to?”
In Deuteronomy 8:2-4, the children of Israel were reminded God had a purpose for the forty long years in the wilderness, and these verses are also a reminder to us as we face our own desert seasons.
“Remember how the Lord your God led you all the way in the wilderness these forty years, to humble and test you in order to know what was in your heart, whether or not you would keep his commands.He humbled you, causing you to hunger and then feeding you with manna, which neither you nor your ancestors had known, to teach you that man does not live on bread alone but on every word that comes from the mouth of the Lord.Your clothes did not wear out and your feet did not swell during these forty years.”
In the wilderness God:
- Leads you all the way through.
- Tests, strengthens, and matures your faith.
- Builds Christ-like character.
- Teaches you deeper reliance and trust in him.
In these verses God not only reveals his purpose, he wants us to see his provision in the wilderness, and that ultimately it is a place he uses to purge us and produce things in us, including a greater dependance on him. It will require an additional change in perspective, from “Why is this happening to me, to, “What is God producing in me.” As Romans 8:28 reminds us, ” And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”
Let’s be honest, even with this perspective, the wilderness is an unpleasant place, fleshly speaking. We naturally want prosperity, health, and comfort. Sometimes we forget that there will be times of trial and pressure throughout our lives and our faith will be tested. But the God of grace will meet you even in the wilderness and as Deuteronomy causes us to remember, he will lead you all the way. This is where disciplining yourself and training your heart and mind to lean into God as he leads you through is essential. Take time to pray for an increased sensitivity to his Holy Spirit and ask him to give you spiritual eyes to see how he is providing even in midst of the suffering that the wilderness can induce.
In the desert seasons it will be tempting to rely on your feelings rather than anchor yourself in God’s faithfulness and the truth of his character. But this is where it is essential that you keep your eyes fixed on Jesus. I’m not saying it is easy but over time, in dry seasons, faith will be your go to instead of apathy, panic or fear.
As God led the Israelites into and through the wilderness with a greater purpose; to humble them and test them to know what was in their hearts, to purge them, purify them, and teach them greater dependance on him, he will do the same for you. And while it may feel punitive, it’s not. God in his kindness is pruning you and creating a greater depth and authenticity in your relationship with him.
“I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener.He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful” (John 15:1-2).
Pruning is painful but it has purpose. My times in the wilderness have revealed self-dependence, pride, placing my worth and confidence in my work, my finances, my reputation, my relationships and my performance. Difficult seasons have uncovered idols of comfort, certainty, and control, impatience, and even anger when things were not going the way that I imagined they should. Just as we see God testing the Israelites to see what was in their hearts, God tests you to see what is your heart. And he does that out of love because he doesn’t want you or me attached to anything less than him because Jesus truly is the only one that can satisfy your deepest longings. He is your provider and sustainer, the lover of your soul.
When you are in a wilderness season, what comes to the surface? What attitudes, thoughts, or behaviors might God be purging from you? How might he be humbling you and testing you to reveal what is in your heart? Will you allow the season to produce bitterness or cultivate humility? Strengthen your faith or fall into futile thinking? Induce gratitude or grumbling? Be the breeding ground for spiritual maturity or an excuse to abandon your faith? Endurance and perseverance will be required in the wilderness.
And sometimes when you find yourself in seasons of testing and pruning you can forget that suffering is part of the Christian journey. We often want to avoid suffering and are surprised by it when it happens to us, but suffering is a part of life and it will always have a purpose.
“Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us” (Romans 5:3-5).
Because you have hope in Jesus, you can be assured that your painful seasons are not wasted. They are building your character and producing Christ-likeness.
As I reflect on seasons of wilderness in my life that seemed pointless at the time I have come to realize it was in part because I was not prepared for them. And by prepared I don’t mean that you will be able to predict when the wilderness is coming or prevent yourself from entering a long stretch but there is a way to position yourself to prosper rather than fall into despair when times of refining come. Oftentimes we wait until we find ourselves in a desert season and then we go into a minor panic because of our lack of preparation. And again, while preparing will not prevent a desert season it will equip you to persevere.
I was doing a little research online about surviving in the wilderness when I stumbled across a few websites for hikers. There was one article called, “Wilderness Survival Gear: Tools you should always have in your pack.” Any hiker will tell you that to survive long hikes in uncharted territory, it takes preparation and certain equipment. Food, a fire starter, knife, map, compass, whistle, and headlamp to name a few.
It reminded me of “tools” we should always have “on hand,” things as followers of Jesus we should make our practice in and out of every season. And not merely to survive but thrive, especially when we enter the backwoods of life.
Food is one thing that is essential for the wilderness, and our food is feasting on the Word of God. Making it a daily habit of meditating on God’s Word. Sometimes you will have five minutes, other days you will have 60 or somewhere in between. Don’t let that deter you. You need the nourishment of Scripture daily. Make it a habit first thing in the morning. Scripture before screen time. Before you are tempted to scroll on social media, meet with Jesus! Let his wisdom influence you and start your day rather than being tempted and distracted by influencers vying for your attention. The Bible is your food, your map, your headlamp for life and your guide in wilderness seasons; as Psalm 119:105 says, “Your Word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.”
God’s Word also teaches you and reminds you of his character and this will be crucial in wilderness seasons. How you view God and what you think about him will be fruitful or fatal in times of trial. If you know that God is for you and that he is faithful in every season, while still difficult, when you ultimately grow to trust God you will be able to grab onto truth and stay grounded. Practicing rhythms of silence and stillness are essential tools, too. Take time now to slow down and get into the habit of coming before The Lord and just simply being in his presence. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you increase your sensitivity to him. When you grow in your ability to sense God’s presence you will also grow in your ability to see his provision in your life even in challenging times.
Which brings me to another point about God’s purpose in the wilderness. These seasons are opportunities for you to finetune your aptitude, to be keenly aware of the ways that God is providing for you. Here’s the thing. God is Jehovah-Jireh which literally means, “The Lord will provide.” Provider is who God is. It is his nature, his character. When you are in a wilderness season it can be easy to believe that God is not providing but that is impossible because God’s nature never changes. Your circumstances do not change God’s character.
When you increase in your sensitivity to the Holy Spirit and ask him to help you see the ways he is providing for you in this season, he will open your eyes. I can personally attest to this. There was a long wilderness season in my life where I was terrified, uncertain, and felt totally out of control. I desperately cried out to the Lord to guide me and to show me all of the ways he was providing for me in the unknown season. And he did.
God is your provider. He is providing for you at this very moment. Ask him to help you see, and when he does, thank him. Have a heart of gratitude even if you would rather have another flavor of manna; don’t be like the Israelites in the dessert.
The rabble with them began to crave other food, and again the Israelites started wailing and said, “If only we had meat to eat! We remember the fish we ate in Egypt at no cost—also the cucumbers, melons, leeks, onions and garlic.But now we have lost our appetite; we never see anything but this manna!” (Numbers 11:4-6).
God’s provision in the wilderness may look different than you would like or expect but choose to be grateful that he is supplying what you need. In the wilderness time I referenced, I had to remind myself to not be picky about the provision but be grateful and trust that the Lord knew what he was doing in my seasons of waiting.
He provides in the midst of every circumstance you face. In the desert God showed the Israelites his provision by not only giving them manna to eat. He showed his protecting presence by giving them a cloud by day and a pillar of fire by night to guide their way (Exodus 13:21). He showed them his faithfulness by never leaving or forsaking them as they forged through the unknown.
God does the same for you and he invites you to call out to him in times of uncertainty. King David experienced many wilderness seasons in his life, and we see throughout Psalms how he cries out to God. In Psalm 55:16-17, 22, King David declares,
As for me, I call to God, and the Lord saves me.Evening, morning and noon I cry out in distress, and he hears my voice….Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken.
In his moment of distress and uncertainty, David believed that God was sovereign. He put his dependance and trust in God and that kept him from being swallowed up in his wilderness seasons.
The Lord may seem silent in your wilderness, but he hears you and invites you to call out to him.
King David also shows us the importance of having a posture of praise as he worships in the wilderness.You, God, are my God, earnestly I seek you; I thirst for you, my whole being longs for you,
in a dry and parched land where there is no water. I have seen you in the sanctuary and beheld your power and your glory. Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you. I will praise you as long as I live, and in your name I will lift up my hands. I will be fully satisfied as with the richest of foods; with singing lips my mouth will praise you (Psalm 63:1-5).
And finally, remember that Jesus also had a wilderness experience and satan tried to use it as a time for self-reliance and doubting God. But Jesus stood firm. Satan wants to take you down with doubt, discouragement, and distraction and tempt you to detour from your faith but stand firm fellow follower. Expect God’s faithfulness to help you get through desert places.
I really want to encourage you not to despair, not to lose faith, not to let go of God in your life, but stand in this season as a person who believes that she is deeply loved by God.
The wilderness is a period in your life in which true faith can emerge. It’s a place of purpose where God provides as he purges and produces greater character in you. Your life will bear fruit in ways that are far beyond your own predications or understanding.
Pray to God. “Lord, help me not waste the wilderness. I want to look back on this time seeing that I trusted you.”
When you finally leave the wilderness, you will not be the same person who entered it, as long as you let it do what it needs to do. At the end of the day, when you lean in, trust, and surrender, the wilderness will be the gateway to deep connection with God. And as Philippians 4:19 says,
“And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus.”
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
It’s easy to try to get our identity from all the wrong places rather than from the very of truth of God. Have you ever been in a season of waiting? Maybe you are in a time of waiting right now. Are you waiting to hear back on a job interview, a promotion, a letter of acceptance to school. Maybe you are waiting on a phone call from a long-lost friend or estranged family member, a call from the doctor for a diagnosis. Waiting is hard.
I was having dinner with a friend the other night and she was lamenting about prayers that are seeming to go unanswered. We talked about how difficult and often uncomfortable it can be when we experience what feels like long delays as we seek God for help, or answers to a problem we are facing. We confided to one another the pain and frustration we can feel in the waiting. Can you relate? Have your prayers ever sounded like a broken record as you wonder why God was waiting so long to answer?
Proverbs 3:5-6 reminds us what wisdom looks like in the waiting. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”
Trust God not your own understanding. If we’re honest, disheartenment can take up residence in us when we rely on our limited knowledge and vision of a situation. We can be tempted to trust in what we know and forget that we serve an all-knowing, trustworthy God. We can be enticed to give into impatience rather than fully surrendering to the faithfulness of Jesus.
In Psalm 27, David expresses authentic faith and courageous trust in God as he cries out and waits in confident expectation that the Lord will rescue and save him in his time of trouble. In Verse 14 he declares he will, “Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.”
David is training his heart to trust and remember that the Lord hears him and he is faithful. In his perfect timing God will answer David and come to his rescue. In his perfect timing God will answer you and come to your rescue. Waiting for God to come through is a way that God builds your faith and character and grows your spiritual maturity.
Waiting can feel like wasted time but it isn’t. The waiting sanctifies you. The waiting humbles you. The waiting prunes you. The waiting strengthens your dependence on God.
What are you waiting for from God? Will you trust him? It really comes down to choice. Will you choose patience and faith, or will you give into fear, doubt, worry, and anxiety? Listen, God is for you. He is making a way for you. Cooperate with him so the time spent waiting will prove productive and fruitful. There is wisdom in the waiting.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Do you want to live a long, good life and enjoy the beauty that fills each day? I’m guessing the answer is “yes.”
There is so much advice coming at us at a rapid pace these days and there is no shortage of knowledge and information clamoring for our attention. We are inundated with commercials, podcasts, Instagram, and social media posts that tell us the ways to achieve the “good life.” Buy this car, have this job, make this salary, acquire this house, wear these clothes, marry this person….. The list towards the pursuit of happiness is infinite and the chase is endless. And whatever we look to to guide our “happiness,” whatever “wisdom” we consume on a daily basis, will ultimately consume us and have a profound effect on our hearts, minds, attitudes and actions.
That’s why it is important to look to God’s Word as we seek discernment and wisdom for our everyday life. I want to look to the Psalms as we pursue godly instruction to guide our paths.
Psalm 34:12-14 says, “Whoever of you loves life and desires to see many good days, keep your tongue from evil and your lips from telling lies. Turn from evil and do good; seek peace and pursue it.”
The keys to a good life:
- Watch your words.
- Turn your back on sin.
- Practice being at peace.
Can you imagine what the world would be like if these were the standards? Surely we would all be living our days filled with more beauty and goodness. While these are not the principles of the world, as a follower of Jesus these are instructions from God’s Word and we are called to live by these truths.
If you were to examine your words, do you speak with integrity? Do your words show moral character and honesty? Are they in alignment with Ephesians 4:29 which says, “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”When you are tempted to sin do you take the way out as 1 Corinthians 10:13 says, “And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.”
Do you practice peace as Romans 12:18 says, “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”
As a child of God you have the profound privilege of living in a manner that shows the world a better way of living a good life, and enjoying the beauty that fills each day.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
A few years ago I received a call from a friend. When I picked up the phone she asked if we could talk. She said she had been hurt by something I did and wanted to have a conversation about it because our relationship was important to her. I admired the courage it took for her to call me. It would have been much easier for her to stew or make up stories about what happened rather than take the initiative to share her hurt. She went on to describe what happened from her perspective and how she felt. I really admired the way she approached the conversation. She did not blame; she shared her experience and point of view. She sought to engage in dialogue rather than prove a point or put me in my place.
Ephesians 4:15 says, “Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ.” Christian maturity is marked by the ability to share difficult truths in a loving way. And my friend did this which led to a fruitful conversation. Her attitude was one of humility. As you prepare to approach a conflict situation, the actual words and delivery in the midst of the confrontation are key.
No matter the level of hurt or offense, approach the conversation with humility. Share your perspective. Avoid blaming. Seek to understand the other person’s perspective. Listen.
If you are the one who was hurt, give grace and extend forgiveness. If you caused the hurt, own it, sincerely apologize, and ask for forgiveness. Give your ego a backseat and seek the fruit of the Spirit of peace.
Whether you are the injured or offending party, seeking an end to conflict by pursuing harmony and being a peacemaker is biblical. As children of God we are called to share Jesus’s passion for peace and reconciliation. Where can you actively engage in conflict with the goal of breaking down the walls that seek to divide your relationships? Who will you call this week to address a conflict as you seek peace and reconciliation?
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Are you a peacemaker or a peacekeeper? There’s a difference between being a peacemaker, actively pursuing peace in the midst of conflict, and being a peacekeeper, avoiding conflict in an attempt to keep the often “false peace”.
According to the Bible there is nothing inherently wrong with conflict. Disagreements happen. But the way we resolve our conflicts is extremely important. Conflict can become the catalyst to greater understanding, intimacy, and depth of relationship; or it can bring anger, bitterness, and broken relationships. How you deal with conflict will literally shape the direction of your life.
Whether it’s addressing a conflict with your supervisor, an argument with your aunt, or not seeing eye to eye with a friend, most of us feel anxious, fearful or at least uncomfortable when conflict arises.
It’s important to ask yourself, “What am I afraid of?” For me, I am often hesitant to lean into conflict because I am afraid I will in some way damage the relationship or cause the other person to not like me, to walk away from the friendship or cause a further wedge between us. Yet more often than not avoiding conflict only leads to a build up of hurt and resentment and then the very thing you fear the most ends up happening. Distance grows, avoidance settles in, and the relationship fades. So what do we do? The first step to take is to identify the conflict. Take time to reflect and write down, “who is the conflict with,” and from your perspective, “what happened?”
This is also a critical time to get honest with yourself and acknowledge the role you played in the conflict. Now you might be saying, “it’s all her fault. I did nothing wrong.” But most often there is something that both parties need to address and own. It could be an attitude or reaction on your part that God brings to light. As the saying goes, “it takes two to tango.” My favorite verses in displaying humility and inviting God to shed light on my contribution to a breakdown are found in Psalm 139:23-24. “Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.” Invite Jesus into your conflict!
This posture before God models a teachable heart and invites God to use the conflict situation to grow and sanctify you. Your heart will be primed to approach the other person with humility and in a way that will honor God.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Have you ever experienced conflict in the workplace? Clashing with another person is part of life and the truth is, we have all experienced conflict, in both our personal and professional relationships.
Sometimes you find yourself in a minor disagreement, other times conflict can turn into a full blown falling out with a co-worker or friend. Whether in the workplace, or at home, relational discord is part of life. It is not a matter of “if” you will have conflict but “how will you show” up in the face of it.
How do you react when there is a disagreement, disharmony or tension in a relationship? Do you hide or withdraw and harbor your hurt? Do you react by lashing out, pointing fingers and blaming? Maybe you move into a mode of avoidance just hoping the conflict will resolve itself. While we know that none of these responses is helpful, it can be easy to default to behaviors that are unbiblical. Fear, pride, or simply not knowing how to engage with conflict in a healthy way can hinder our relationships with others. So what is the God-honoring and relationship-building way to approach what most of us experience as uncomfortable conflict situations?
In the sermon on the mount, Jesus gives us counsel and words of wisdom when he says, “Blessed are the peacemakers for they will be called children of God” (Matthew 5:9).
Notice that Jesus says “peacemaker” not “peacekeeper.” This is a really important distinction. Being a peacemaker infers an active and intentional posture towards pursuing and creating peace. Taking the actions necessary to live in harmony with another person. Acknowledging there is a relational rift.
Peacekeeping on the other hand is often passive and an attempt to work hard at pretending that nothing is wrong or bothering you to keep tensions from rising. Peacekeepers try to avoid conflict at any cost. Peacemakers invite necessary conflict and know that it is a part of life. Now I am not saying that you should intentionally stir up conflict. I am saying that conflict is an unavoidable part of life and rather than ignore it, acknowledge it.
Re-frame conflict as a way that can enrich the relationship when approached in love and handled in a gospel grounded way. Practice the courage to engage conflict rather than living in a land of false peace.
And remember, in the words of Jesus, when you pursue peace, you will be blessed and called children of God.
What are the dreams you’ve been carrying around with you for a long time? What are the ideas and wishes that are still nuggets in the back of your mind? Would you like to see some of them become a reality, to the glory of God?
You know, there are many good dreamers in the world who never get to the doing part. Jesus said that the blessing comes when we do what we know we should do. So, if we only dream and wish and hope, and we never take any steps to turn those dreams into goals and make them happen, then obviously, we miss out on the blessing. And when you miss the blessing, you miss the joy and excitement and fulfillment that God has for you.
I think there are many people who feel that life is just one day after another, the same ole same ole, and they don’t really enjoy living very much because they’ve never stepped out and by faith, reached for some of their dreams and worked to reach a goal. I can see how life would be pretty dull if there was never anything to reach for.
Why do people wish and dream but often never make it happen? Well, perhaps because they’re reactive instead of proactive people. We talked about that in part one. A reactive person is one who allows others and circumstances to dictate what happens to them. They make victims of themselves and then claim it’s not their fault!
A proactive person is one who looks down the road, sets a goal, and instead of looking for excuses not to pursue that goal, that person refuses to be sidetracked and he or she heads for the goal they’ve set. Proactive people don’t wait for life to dish out their destiny. They determine where they want to go—where God wants them to go—and do the things that are necessary to get there.
Now, let me hasten to add that as believers, our goals should be ordained by God. We should be going for the things that bring honor to Jesus. Our goals should bring glory to God, not to ourselves, and should not be selfish goals. We need eternally significant goals—to set our hearts on doing the things that will make a difference.
Those goals can range from the simple everyday things of our lives to life-changing pursuits. For example, you may need to set a goal to become a better communicator—listening better, choosing words more carefully, being truly attentive to others, etc. You don’t need to pray about whether to do that or not; it’s a great goal and it will glorify Jesus. But let me tell you, becoming a better communicator will not happen unless you determine to set a goal and pursue it.
So, whether your goal is to change a bad habit or improve your skills in some way, or a goal to start your own business, or go to the mission field or whatever, you need a plan and a method that will help you turn that dream, that wish, into a specific goal with practical steps to take that will get you there. And today I want to offer some suggestions.
Begin with a personal mission statement—a center that governs everything you do throughout your life.
You might want to begin this process of turning dreams and wishes into goals by writing this personal mission statement. It would be a good overall plan to act as a governing center in your life to guide your decisions, your motivations, your whole life. Not long after my ministry began, the Board of Directors developed this mission statement for The Christian Working Woman:
The Christian Working Woman exists to equip and encourage Christians in the workplace, primarily women, to know and love Christ more, and to live as Christ would, by applying biblical principles and utilizing their gifts and abilities to build His Kingdom.
From that came our vision as to how we would fulfill our mission and specific goals for the near and distant future. When we are confronted with new opportunities, we check it out with the mission statement and ask ourselves: Does this further our mission? This keeps us rooted and grounded to stay on track and not be tempted to try to do too much, or to be all things to all people, or forget who we are and why we’re here.
Many organizations have developed these mission statements and found it has made a huge difference in keeping them on course and avoiding bad decisions. Why not use that idea for each of our lives as individuals?
It is not something you write overnight. It takes introspection, careful analysis, thoughtful expression, and often many rewrites to produce it in final form, and indeed it may be revised at points. But this mission statement should set the basic values for your life that you are committed to and on which you are not willing to compromise.
The biggest benefit of taking time to write a personal mission statement is that it will force you to do some careful thinking and praying about where you are and where you’re headed. Often we just go through our days, one after another, without ever giving thought to the big picture. With a personal mission statement, you can remind yourself, when you face decisions, to make sure that you are spending your time, resources and energy on the things that will contribute to the fulfillment of your mission.
Obviously, as Christians, this mission statement has to be in line with God’s Word and his explicit will as we learn it through the Bible. Our priorities are dictated to us by the Spirit of God and the Word of God, and we must first seek his will to write the mission statement that he has for us.
Here are some Scripture verses that should govern that mission statement:
Matthew 6:33: But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
Proverbs 3:5-6: Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight.
Proverbs 16:3: Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans.
Establish practical ways to turn your wishes into goals.
I’ve often suggested things for you to do that will help you turn wishes to be more like Jesus into goals—and that’s a goal every Christ-follower should have. For instance, I’ve encouraged you to put on the inner garments of Colossians 3 on a daily basis; to set specific guidelines for your thought life and practice bringing your thoughts into captivity; to establish a time each day that you spend getting to know God, and many more. Those are just ideas to help you turn from a wisher into a doer.
I want to encourage you to get serious about turning some of your dreams and wishes into goals, and to begin by putting it in writing. That’s a good first step, and in fact, I have developed a form make this first step.
You begin by identifying one thing you want to achieve, one thing you want to improve in your life, on your job, in your relationships, whatever. Write it down. Now, ask yourself, “Did I write a wish or a goal?” A goal would be: “In order to be more organized, I am going to start using a To-Do list on a daily basis beginning today.” Whereas a wish would be “I’m going to get more organized.” Until it becomes specific with a time schedule, it is still in the wish/dream category.
Once you’ve written it down and gotten it into the form of a goal, ask yourself, “How badly do I want this?” If you’re not truly committed to achieving that goal, it simply won’t happen. Jesus said we find God when we search for him with our whole heart. Lots of people would like to know God better, but not everyone is willing to put out the time and effort required to search for him with the whole heart. So, as you look at your goal, you have to be certain you are truly committed to it.
Then, in order to achieve that goal, make sure you bite off small pieces at a time. For example, if you’ve never established a daily time with God, don’t try to start with an hour a day. Start with fifteen or twenty minutes. Get that firmly established. Then increase it in small increments a week at a time. Sometimes we discourage ourselves because we see the job before us as so large that it looks like we’ll never make it. But if you take the large goal and turn it into a series of small ones that don’t look impossible, pretty soon you’ll find you’ve achieved your goal.
And lastly, I would encourage you to establish accountability for yourself in these goals that you set. Ask someone to check up on you. That accountability is very important.
So, let’s repeat those steps that will help us turn wishes and dreams into goals:
- Take a piece of paper or sit down at your computer and write a specific goal you want to reach. It must be specific, with a time frame.
- Break that goal up into smaller pieces, each with a time frame. For example, if you want to clean up your files, break that big job into smaller pieces, like one file drawer at a time. Or you can break it into smaller time pieces: one hour a day.
- Establish some accountability. Tell somebody what you’re working at and perhaps ask someone to check up on you, or maybe it’s a goal you share with someone, and you can work on it together. That’s always motivating, to have someone in it with you.
Then, as the commercial tells us, just do it!
Paul wrote to the Corinthians: “So we make it our goal to please him (the Lord), whether we are at home in the body or away from it” (2 Corinthians 5:9). And to the Philippians he wrote: “I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 3:14).
Turning Wishes into Goals…and Turning Goals into Action Handout
Jesus taught us to render to Caesar the things that are Caesar’s, and to God the things that are God’s. Since there are no Caesars in our lives, what does that mean to us today in our everyday worlds? We conclude our thoughts about conflicting priorities. I think this is a principle we need to understand very clearly.
If you think of your employer as “Caesar” in this case, how does this principle apply to you?
Well, first of all, what are the things you should be giving your employer—the things that are rightfully his or hers?
- Hard work. You must be careful to apply yourself conscientiously and work your full shift. A Christian should never take advantage of their employer by cheating them out of time or work that is due to them.
- Protection of the employer’s assets. Those pencils and pens, paper clips and pads supplied by your employer are not for your personal supply room at home. Expense accounts should be meticulously honest and fair.
- Loyalty. While you are taking your salary from that employer, you owe them respect and you should not be found stabbing them in the back or running them down to others.
But, on the other hand, what do you NOT owe your employer?
- Dishonesty of any sort. Lying for your employer is giving to them what is due to God. An employer has no right to ask an employee to lie or deceive in any way. This is where you need to take a stand and not render to that employer what is not due them.
- Participation in any activity that is dishonoring to God. Socializing after work can create some compromising situations. If you have to be a part of these in order to keep your job, it’s probably time to look for another job. You are rendering to Caesar the things that belong to God.
As we think about how to choose between conflicting priorities, we want to always remember that there are some clear lines to be drawn. Give to your employer what is due them. Jesus gave us that principle, and we should take it very seriously. But make certain you don’t get trapped into giving an employer what is God’s right to ask of you.
You know, sometimes you feel like if you do your job right, it causes you to be uncaring and tough with employees or coworkers. Did you ever find yourself in that kind of predicament? Well, how do we handle what seems like conflicting priorities like these?
It is right for you to demand of yourself and others that the job be done right. But it’s also true that as a Christian, you should be concerned about the personal welfare and feelings of the people who work for you and/or with you.
The first thing we can and should do is to pray daily for those employees and coworkers. Pray for them specifically by name. As much as you can, learn something of their personal situation so that you can pray for them effectively. Obviously, you can certainly pray for their job performance and their relationships and attitudes on the job. That’s the best thing you can do for them.
And then, remember that your attitude toward these people will clearly indicate that you care about them. Treating them with respect; understanding that in God’s sight you are all the same; caring about their lives; giving them recognition when they deserve it; making allowances for personal situations when you can; treating everyone with fairness and honesty—all of these are ways to show God’s love to your employees and coworkers and to be a servant to them.
What is often frustrating is that many times it’s difficult, if not impossible, to carry on the daily duties of your job and still interact with each person, whether coworker or employee, on the personal basis that you would like to. Even in my small organization I find that a frustration. I’d like to know every little thing concerning my staff and take time to talk about their concerns in detail, but if I did that very often, we’d get very little work done. What I’ve been learning to do is to trust God to bring other people into their lives to help and care for them when I can’t reach out to them as I would like to. And then I pray he’ll make me sensitive to know when it’s important for me to take that time and reach out.
Remember that as Christians in the marketplace we have unique opportunities to demonstrate what Jesus is like by the way we care about others. If you truly care about other people, loving them as you love yourself, placing their welfare above your own, you can be certain they’ll know it.
Have you ever found yourself faced with decisions which seem to force you to choose between two right things?
For instance, a coworker may really need to talk to you about a problem in his or her life, but you don’t feel you should take company time for a lengthy conversation. Yet you don’t want to be uncaring or rude. I believe our first priority is to do our job well. That means you may have to cut off that conversation with the hurting person and make an appointment to talk at lunch or break or after work, because it’s not right to take company time for long personal conversations.
What about the particular dilemma mangers and supervisors face in being a demanding supervisor versus showing concern and care for those employees? Think of Jesus and his staff of twelve men. Do you think he was demanding of their time? I get the feeling that those men put in long hard days quite often.
Being a firm supervisor, insuring that the employees who work for you do their jobs right and put in a good day’s work is not contrary to Christian principles of love and kindness. As a Christian supervisor, your job is to make certain that your employees perform well and work hard for the company.
Of course, we cannot ask of others what we do not give ourselves. Whatever Jesus asked of his disciples in time and hard work, he did more than they did. As long as you role model hard work and dedication for your people, you have earned the right to demand that of them. Quite frankly, you will be doing your employees a favor to teach them the rightness of hard work, honesty and diligence.
Now, that responsibility may cause you to seem harsh at times. If you’re like me, I much prefer having people like me than not like me! However, your job description does not say, “Everyone must like you.” When you have an employee who resists working hard or doing the job right, and you as the supervisor insist on right work, that person is not likely to count you their best friend. Welcome to management and leadership; it goes with the territory.
Put yourself in this situation: You are at the job working and a coworker wants to talk about a personal problem. You want to listen and show compassion, but the conversation is on company time, and it’s beginning to get lengthy. You have work to do and yet you don’t want to be unkind or uncaring to this friend who is hurting. What do you do? Sometimes we face priority conflicts where it seems that doing one right thing will cause us to do something that isn’t right.
One listener wrote me about his particular dilemma. He is a foreman with several men working for him. Quoting him, “In my position, I often find it hard to strike a balance between being firm enough with my men to lead them, and being a servant to them; also to serve others in the company (such as the unbelievers) without compromising the use of my time and/or resources. I want to be a servant, but I also must get the job done; I desire to be an example of Christ-likeness, but the things that I often feel I must do in situations seem harsh.”
Often our duties and responsibilities seem in opposition to what we would like to do and think we should do as a Christian. How do we deal with these conflicting priorities?
Well, I don’t pretend to have all the answers here. It’s a good idea to be cautious when anyone is quick to give you pat answers. Have you ever wondered why God allows us to face what seems like conflicting priorities?
I believe it’s because these are the things which keep us on our knees, going back to God time and again with each particular situation, asking for guidance. These are the predicaments that remind us of how weak and helpless we are on our own. I think I could easily become very cocky and self-assured if I thought I knew exactly what I should do at every decision point in my life. But so often I’m driven to desperation by what looks like an impossible decision, and that brings me just where I should be, begging God to guide me and help me.
So, we can see how God uses conflicting priorities and decisions for good. I’d like to share with you some thoughts that may help in choosing between conflicting priorities.
Put yourself in this situation: You are at the job working and a coworker wants to talk about a personal problem. You want to listen and show compassion, but the conversation is on company time, and it’s beginning to get lengthy. You have work to do and yet you don’t want to be unkind or uncaring to this friend who is hurting. What do you do? Sometimes we face priority conflicts where it seems that doing one right thing will cause us to do something that isn’t right.
One listener wrote me about his particular dilemma. He is a foreman with several men working for him. Quoting him, “In my position, I often find it hard to strike a balance between being firm enough with my men to lead them, and being a servant to them; also to serve others in the company (such as the unbelievers) without compromising the use of my time and/or resources. I want to be a servant, but I also must get the job done; I desire to be an example of Christ-likeness, but the things that I often feel I must do in situations seem harsh.”
Often our duties and responsibilities seem in opposition to what we would like to do and think we should do as a Christian. How do we deal with these conflicting priorities?
Well, I don’t pretend to have all the answers here. It’s a good idea to be cautious when anyone is quick to give you pat answers. Have you ever wondered why God allows us to face what seems like conflicting priorities?
I believe it’s because these are the things which keep us on our knees, going back to God time and again with each particular situation, asking for guidance. These are the predicaments that remind us of how weak and helpless we are on our own. I think I could easily become very cocky and self-assured if I thought I knew exactly what I should do at every decision point in my life. But so often I’m driven to desperation by what looks like an impossible decision, and that brings me just where I should be, begging God to guide me and help me.
So, we can see how God uses conflicting priorities and decisions for good. I’d like to share with you some thoughts that may help in choosing between conflicting priorities.
Do you know the difference in a wish and a goal? Lots of us wish for many good things, but not too many of us see those good things happen in our lives because we’ve never turned our wishes into goals.
A goal is not a wish. A goal:
- Is realistic and achievable.
- Has a time schedule.
- Is simple and specific.
- Is measurable in terms of numbers and specifics.
- Is written down for accountability.
I could wish all day that I could be an accountant but that could never be a goal because it’s not achievable for me. A goal has a time schedule and is measurable in some way or another. I may wish to lose weight, but in order to do that, I need to set a goal and a time frame for that goal. “I will lose five pounds in four weeks.” That’s a goal.
Now, given that definition of a goal, are you truly a goal-oriented person, or do you just wish a lot? I find many of us are very good wishers, but not many of us take those wishes and turn them into goals that we work to achieve. Well, after all, wishes don’t take any energy or discipline; goals do. Wishes don’t require any commitment from us; goals do.
For instance, you may wish that you had a closer walk with God; you may wish that you really knew how to pray with power; you may wish that you knew the Bible better. Those are good wishes, but my friends, until you turn them into goals, your spiritual growth will stagnate.
If you listen to this program regularly, you’ve heard me suggest things for you to do that will help you turn wishes into goals. For instance, I’ve encouraged you to put on the inner garments of Colossians 3 on a daily basis; to set specific guidelines for your thought life and practice bringing your thoughts into captivity; to establish a time each day that you spend getting to know God, and many more. Those are just ideas to help you turn from a wisher into a doer.
Now, ask yourself this question: Am I a task-oriented person or a goal-oriented person? What’s the difference? Well:
A task-oriented person focuses on doing things right.
A goal-oriented person focuses on doing the right things right.
Are you doing the right thing or just doing things right? Certainly a goal-oriented person must be a task-oriented person frequently. But it’s possible to be task-oriented without being goal-oriented. In other words, you could work very hard and always be busy, but never truly be focused on worthwhile goals and never see any of your dreams and plans realized because of being task-oriented and not goal-oriented.
Why is it important for a Christian to be a goal-oriented person?
The Bible frequently admonishes us to look for the big picture and set our eyes on the goal. We’re reminded not to just look at the visible things around us, but to fix our eyes on the invisible things; to see beyond the obvious and set our eyes on the eternal. Well, that’s really what being a goal-oriented person is all about. It’s the ability to look beyond the everyday duties and responsibilities and minutia that tends to eat up all our time, and make sure you’re focusing your life and energy on goals that add value and make a difference.
Jesus said:
Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them. (John 13:17).
Blessed rather are those who hear the word of God and obey it. (Luke 11:28).
I have brought you glory on earth by finishing the work you gave me to do (John 17:4).
These passages underline the fact that Jesus was a doer, and he didn’t waste time talking about what he wanted to do. He did what the Father had sent him to do. He came to this earth with certain goals in mind, and nothing was going to stop him from reaching his goals.
He said that he had come to do the Father’s will, and he did it. At times the disciples tried to dissuade him from the Father’s will, his enemies tried to keep him from doing the Father’s will, Satan tempted him to try to keep him from doing the Father’s will. But Jesus was a goal-oriented person, and nothing would make him take his eyes off the goal.
Do we ever need more Christians who will become goal-oriented doers and not just wishers and dreamers! Perhaps you’ve met the Tator family. There’s Dick Tator, the father, and Emmy Tator, his wife, their daughter, Hessie Tator and son Aggie Tator, and then there’s Grandpa Spec Tator! Well, believe me, the world is full of Spec Tators and Hessie Tators. People who have good intentions but never reach their goals because they don’t know how or they’re not willing to turn their wishes into goals and then do them. That’s where the blessing of God comes to us—in the doing.
What are the results of being a goal-oriented person?
- You bring glory to God.
When we are doers and not just hearers, God is honored. That really should be all the reason we need to motivate us to be more goal oriented. It pleases Jesus, and isn’t that enough? But there’s more:
- You are blessed—happy, fulfilled, joyful.
There is real joy, deep satisfaction, in being productive and seeing that you’ve quit talking and gone to doing! God intended for us to be that kind of people, so obviously, we are happiest when we are in his will.
Let me emphasize that when you are goal-oriented and you become a doer, not just a wisher or a hearer, you benefit more than anyone else. Do you find yourself discouraged a lot? It could be because you’re not turning wishes into goals. Do you find that you are often discontented with your life or yourself? Perhaps that’s because you never get around to doing the things that will bring more value and meaning into your life and make you feel better about yourself.
- You are a good steward of your gifts and talents and will receive a better reward.
The Bible frequently talks about the rewards that await us in heaven, and we will receive awards based on our performance. Now, getting into heaven isn’t based on our performance. That’s based on our faith and trust in the blood of Jesus Christ and the forgiveness of sins that he freely offers. But the Bible clearly teaches that rewards will be given for those who have obeyed the Lord and used their gifts really well. Those rewards we will receive in heaven are the things we can cast at the feet of Jesus when we worship him on his throne. Want to have some tributes to bring to Jesus? You need to be goal-oriented and turn some of those wishes into goals so you’ll have rewards to give to Jesus.
Also, if you remember the parable Jesus taught about the talents, he illustrated that those who use their gifts and talents well will be blessed with more to use. When you are a goal-oriented person, you will be using your God-given gifts more effectively, and that will open up the door for God to give you more talents and abilities. If you’ve been thinking that you just don’t have what it takes to do what you want to do, it could be because you aren’t using what God’s given to you. He won’t give you more talents and abilities until you use the ones you have.
- You are more content with who you are and less likely to want to be like someone else.
When you set and achieve goals that help you to accomplish things and get things done, you will have less and less reason to be jealous of others and more and more content that God has created you for special reasons and you can realize who you were meant to be in Christ.
- You have less stress in your life.
Becoming a goal-oriented person is a great way to reduce stress in your life. All those wishes that have been hanging over your head–all those things you’re going to do someday—they begin to weigh on your mind, even when you’re not consciously aware of them. That can cause major energy leaks and make you exhausted a lot, just thinking about those wishes that should be turned into goals.
So, there’s any number of wonderful reasons why we should get serious about turning our wishes into goals and becoming goal-oriented people.
There’s another thing that’s essential if you are to become goal-oriented, and that is you must be a proactive person, not a reactive person. You might ask what I mean by that.
What is the difference in a proactive and a reactive person?
A proactive person is one who recognizes that she is responsible for her own actions and choices in life. Proactive people do not blame circumstances, conditions or conditioning for their behavior. They do not look for a scapegoat to take the blame for their poor performance.
A proactive person has the ability to subordinate an impulse to a value. They understand the need to wait for the best and not be driven by the desires of the moment. They know you have to work for things, earn your right, prove your worth and put in your time. They are willing to do without something today in order to achieve their long-term, valuable goal later on. Let me repeat that: A proactive person has the ability to subordinate an impulse to a value.
Proactive people are driven by values that they’ve carefully thought about and made a part of themselves. They have made decisions about what is important and what isn’t. They have standards of conduct and principles of behavior that they refuse to compromise. They think beyond the moment and prepare themselves to make good choices by establishing their own personal guidelines for their lives.
A reactive person is one who has chosen to empower things to control them. Things such as circumstances, other people, conditions. Reactive people are often affected by their physical environment. If the weather is good, they feel good. If it isn’t, it affects their performance. They are affected by their social environment, by how other people treat them, by how they feel. Reactive people build their emotional lives around the behavior of others, empowering the weaknesses of other people to control them.
Proactive people are looking for ways to make it happen. Reactive people are looking for excuses. Which one are you?
Well, if you want to change, if you want to be more goal-oriented, you can, because Jesus gives us the power to be what we could never be by ourselves. Look for part two of “Becoming a Goal-Oriented Person” and I will give you some very practical things you can do to help you become more goal-oriented. I’m including a form that you might find helpful in turning wishes into goals.
Turning Wishes into Goals…and Turning Goals into Action Handout
Were you a good student in school? Did you make good grades? Even if you didn’t make particularly good grades in school, there is one test—one exam—where you can do really well, if you’re prepared. I’m talking about being prepared for our final exam as believers in Jesus Christ. That day when we will give an account to Jesus for our stewardship while here on earth. In the Bible it’s called the Judgment Seat of Christ, and that’s where we’ll receive rewards for having the right answers—or not.
Here are some more passages in Scripture that give us insight into what will be on that final exam.
1 Thessalonians 2:19: For what is our hope, our joy, or the crown in which we will glory in the presence of our Lord Jesus when he comes? Is it not you?
Hebrews 6:10: God is not unjust; he will not forget your work and the love you have shown him as you have helped his people and continue to help them.
The people you have touched will be your greatest joy in Heaven. The people you rejoiced with and cried with, the people you reached with the Gospel—this is going to be a big deal on that final exam. People matter to God. Jesus loves people, and what you have done as a servant to help others will truly matter at the Judgment Seat of Christ.
And one last reminder of what will be on that final exam:
2 Timothy 4:8: Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day—and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing.
This is the bottom line for us as believers, because if you long for the appearing of Jesus, if you are aware that your time on earth is time to prepare for that final exam, and therefore you have an eternal perspective, then you will be prepared for that final exam, and you’ll do well when you stand before Jesus.
The final exam is coming whether we’re prepared or not. We have time to prepare. Let’s go for it.
I always liked to get good grades in school. I guess everybody did—right? But my grade depended on how prepared I was for the exams. Did you know that as believers in Jesus Christ, there will be a final exam for us? It’s called the Judgment Seat of Christ, where believers will be graded—if you will—on how well we represented Jesus while on earth, and rewards will be given to those who are prepared.
I’m looking at what the Bible tells us will be on the exam and what we can do to hear Jesus say, “Well done, good and faithful servant.” Here are few more things that will be on that final exam:
Did you do for people who could not repay you? Were you generous for the right reasons?
Luke 14:12 – 14: Then Jesus said to his host, “When you give a luncheon or dinner, do not invite your friends, your brothers or sisters, your relatives, or your rich neighbors; if you do, they may invite you back and so you will be repaid.But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind,and you will be blessed. Although they cannot repay you, you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous.”
If you did for others without a quid pro quo—without expecting anything in return—you will get a good grade on that final exam.
Did you work for people and money, or did you work for the Lord?
Colossians 3:22 – 24: Slaves, obey your earthly masters in everything; and do it, not only when their eye is on you and to curry their favor, but with sincerity of heart and reverence for the Lord.Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters,since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.
That means what you do every day on your job—whether it’s in your home or otherwise, whether you receive a salary for it or not—you will be rewarded by the Lord on the final exam for working for the Lord, doing whatever you have to do with excellence and joy, because you are serving the Lord Christ.
I’m giving you answers to the final—a preview of what will be on your final exam in Heaven. Now, I should explain that this final exam is for those who are Christ-followers and have been born from above through faith in Jesus. The Bible teaches that Christians will have to give an account to Jesus for how we used our resources while here on earth. The good news is, the Bible gives us some insight into what will be important on this final exam.
For example, one question will have to do with your motivation—why you did what you did for Jesus.
Matthew 6:3-4: But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.
Jesus is talking about doing good for the right reasons, because you truly wanted to help others and you didn’t do it to impress anyone. Jesus said you will be rewarded for that kind of generosity.
Again in that same chapter, Jesus says: “But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.” (Matthew 6:6).
Jesus said that those who give to the poor or pray and fast for public acknowledgement will get no reward in heaven for it, for they cared more for earthly rewards than heavenly ones.
Here’s another question on the final exam:
Did you love unlovable people—did you love your enemies?
Luke 6:35a: But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great…
Got any unlovable people in your life right now? Maybe even some enemies who are deliberately trying to do you harm? If you can love them with the love of Jesus, you’ll do well on the final exam.
Did you know that the Bible teaches that all believers in Jesus Christ will have a final examination in Heaven? It’s true—there will be a day when you will stand before Jesus to give an account for the stewardship of your time, money, skills, love—and there will be certain rewards for things you’ve done. The good news is, the Bible tells us exactly what is going to be on that final test and how we can be certain that we will pass with flying colors and hear Jesus say, “Well done, good and faithful servant.”
Here are some of the questions on that final test:
Have you been persecuted because of your stand and devotion to Jesus Christ?
Matthew 5:11 – 12: Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.
We read again in James 1:12: Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial. Because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.
We know there are many Christians in other parts of the world today who are truly persecuted, even killed, for their faith. Their crown is waiting on them. But even though you may not live under such persecution, if you have suffered for your stand for Christ, you will pass this question on the final exam. Have you ever been fired for your faith; ostracized by your family or friends because of your faith? Have you taken a clear stand that you are a follower of Jesus Christ, regardless of the ridicule or isolation it may cause or the price you had to pay? That’s a question that will be on the final, and if you can confidently say, “Yes, I was faithful even in persecution,” you will receive a reward.
Have you made wise and eternal investments—investments that are stored up in Heaven?
Matthew 6:19-21: “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”
You have two bank accounts; one on earth, one in heaven. You can put deposits in either one. On the final exam, you will be asked for an accounting of where you put your treasure. We’ve heard it said, “Just follow the money.” Well, following what you’ve done with your money on earth will be on the final exam. Are you investing in eternity or not?
Final exams don’t bring back a lot of good memories for me—how about you?
Ken Blanchard is a well-known American author and management expert, with over 60 books published on leadership and management. He also has taught these topics in universities, and he tells the story that he always handed out the final on the first day of the course, as well as the answers. He said as a result, all of his students got A’s. “After all,” he said, “isn’t it our goal to help the students learn and succeed?”
Well, that’s my kind of final—what about you? If you give me the questions and the answers that are going to be on the test, I probably could ace it too.
Sure sounds like the Apostle Paul knew the answers to the final when he wrote to Timothy:
I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day—and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing (2 Timothy 4:7-8).
He was certain he would have the crown of righteousness when he stood before the Lord. How could he be so sure that he had done that well? Because he knew the answers to the final.
He understood that there would be a final exam even for believers in Jesus Christ. He referred to it as “that day”—that day when every believer will stand before Jesus individually to account for what they have done that mattered for eternity. Paul had lived for that day and not for today.
Our time on earth as followers of Jesus Christ is the time we have to prepare for that final exam. In the Bible we are told exactly what will be on the exam. The Bible tells us “If you do this, you’ll receive certain rewards.” That’s why Paul was confident, because he had listened to Jesus and then he patterned his life around the things that Jesus said would be on the final, so that at the end he could be certain he would be rewarded.
I want to look at the questions and answers that will be on your final exam, when you stand before Jesus on THAT day. It will help you live with an eternal perspective.
Let me begin with this question: If God would come down in some miraculous way and give you clear directions when you’re facing a tough decision—writing on your walls as he did in Old Testament times, or sending you a text as he might do today—would you unquestionably and immediately be willing to do what he told you? Have you finally come to understand that God’s ways are better than your ways—that his thoughts are above your thoughts—that he has good plans for you and his directions are the very best for you?
You see, until you really want above everything else to know and do God’s will—until you are passionately desirous of pleasing God in all your ways, God could write on your walls and you wouldn’t be happy if it wasn’t exactly what you wanted. Many times we just want God to bless our decisions, not redirect us.
Let me assure you that God never plays hide and seek with those who are seeking his guidance. He’s not trying to make it difficult for you to know what to do in puzzling and tough situations. He wants you to know his will more than you want to know it! So, search your heart and make sure you truly want heavenly guidance. That’s the starting place.
The good news is, you have the inspired Word of God, the Bible, to guide you. Romans 15:4 says that “For everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through the endurance taught in the Scriptures and the encouragement they provide we might have hope.” There is hope for you whenever you’re facing a tough decision, and it is at your fingertips in the written Word of God. And on top of having your Bible, you have your own personal teacher, the Holy Spirit. Jesus told his disciples that when he left them, God the Father would send his Spirit to guide them.
I want to point out four specific Scripture passages that tell us how to approach a tough decision. There are many others, but these will get you started on the right path.
1. James 1:5: If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.
This is where you begin every time you face a tough decision. You ask God to give you wisdom. Do you often pray for wisdom? Why wouldn’t you take advantage of this wonderful provision God offers you—wisdom given generously? That’s what you need when you’re trying to make a good decision, right? You need wisdom. Wisdom has been promised to you. So, just take God at his word and pray for wisdom.
2. Psalm 37:7: Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes.
Sometimes when we are pressed to make tough decisions, there’s the temptation to be quick and presumptuous instead of waiting on God. Being still before God means that we will have periods of time when it seems like nothing is happening. Sometimes it’s a timing issue; we want to move now but God knows it’s better to wait. You may not think anything is happening, but God is working behind-the-scenes for you. So, pray for wisdom and then be still and wait for the Lord’s timing.
3. Proverbs 19:20: Listen to advice and accept discipline, and at the end you will be counted among the wise.
Scripture teaches us to seek help when we’re facing tough decisions. However, it’s important to screen out the voices and hear from those who walk closely with God. Proverbs 13:20 says “Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.”
So, you need to seek advice from the right people—godly people who have a track record of walking with God, and who lean heavily on God’s truth in offering advice or help.
4. Proverbs 3:5-6: Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;in all your ways submit to him and he will make your paths straight.
Make sure you are submitting all your ways to the Lord. That simply means that you are living in obedience to the principles of Scripture; there is no known area of willful sin or disobedience in your life—no rebellion. He has promised to make your path straight—to show you the right way and guide you where you should go. But the condition to that promise is that you submit all your ways to him.
So, those four verses provide direction for you when you’re facing tough decisions. Now let’s look at some passages that give specific and clear instruction about many of these decisions we face.
2 Corinthians 6:14: Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?
If you’re facing a decision about a relationship—it could be marriage or a business partnership or an organization you’re considering—this verse will give you guidance. So this “yoke” that Paul is talking about is any kind of covenant or contract or even unwritten commitment where you would be bound together with someone for a certain purpose.
I know many people—men and women—who chose to ignore this biblical principle about choosing a life’s mate and in every case, they lived to regret it. What you want in a good marriage is close fellowship, two people joined together as one, and how can light and darkness be joined together? This is an unequivocal principle from God’s Word; there’s no way to read it any other way. It may be a difficult decision, especially if your feelings are already engaged, but choosing not to be yoked unequally will prove the best for you in the long run.
But this applies not only to marriage but to other types of partnerships as well, where you are legally or verbally committed to some project or business. This verse is clear guidance, and to overlook it is to invite disaster into your life.
Here’s another clear directive from
Proverbs 22:7: The rich rule over the poor, and the borrower is slave to the lender.
Are you facing some financial decision now? This passage warns against unwise debt. The person who borrows too much and has excessive debt is indeed a slave to that debt. Credit card companies are making a lot of money because they have so many people trapped into perpetual debt. Honestly, they don’t want you to pay off your card and be debt free because they are charging huge interest rates and if you’ll just pay the minimum, they’re more than happy to keep you in debt.
Think more than twice about taking on new debt. It will enslave you faster than you can imagine.
Here is a passage that gives us a general directive to guide specific decisions:
1 Corinthians 10:31: So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.
You can take this quite literally and make sure you’re making wise decisions about what you are eating and drinking. Those decisions may seem small at the time, but they truly have a huge impact on your future health and energy and ability to function.
Every decision needs to be put under this spotlight, as you ask yourself, Will this bring glory to God? For example, you may be deciding whether to take a new job or not. So, you need to carefully evaluate the impact this new job will have on your life. Will you have less time for your family, your church? Will you have to compromise your Christian testimony to do this job? Is the product or service offered by this job one you can be proud to be associated with?
One more passage which gives some specific guidelines when you’re facing a tough decision is:
Philippians 4:8: Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.
You could just make a list of the characteristics in this verse to help guide any decision you face:
- Is it true? Would this decision be based on truth, or would it cause some kind of deception or lie?
- Is it noble? Noble means it would show fine personal qualities or high moral principles and ideals.
- Is it right? Would anyone be treated unfairly as a result of this decision? Is there another decision you could make that would clearly be more fair and just?
- Is it pure? A pure decision is one that isn’t tainted with wrong motives or impurity or lack of integrity.
- Is it lovely? Would this decision show love in some way or could it be a means to destroy love.
- Is it admirable and excellent and praiseworthy? That’s pretty self-explanatory, isn’t it? Would people you trust approve and confirm that this decision is good?
Think about your decision in these terms. If it checks all these boxes, it’s a good sign that this could be a good decision. But if it misses on some of them, it should give you pause to think further about it.
Ecclesiastes 11:4 says, “Whoever watches the wind will not plant; whoever looks at the clouds will not reap.” That just means if you’re waiting for totally perfect conditions before you make a decision, you will never get anything done. There are times when you’re faced with a tough decision, you do your best to seek God’s wisdom, and then you have to move ahead with courage in spite of your fears and doubts.
But you’re never alone in this process. As a believer in Jesus Christ, he is there with you, as he has promised, and his Holy Spirit is your constant companion to give you God’s thoughts, and heavenly wisdom. It’s one of the greatest side-benefits we have as children of God—to have his personal guidance on a daily basis through his Word and his Spirit within us. We are not Lone Rangers having to do it all by ourselves. What good news that is.
Perhaps you know the story of Corrie ten Boom and how she and her sister were imprisoned during World War II for hiding Jewish people from the Nazis. Well, I have one last wise statement to give you, and this comes from Corrie. She said, “Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrows; it empties today of its strength.”
We all know that worry is useless and yet I dare say we all still worry, some of us more than others. And Corrie is so right—worrying just takes away your strength and your endurance. What or who is on your worry list today? How long have you been worrying about them or it? Has it helped? Are things any better because you are worrying?
Silly question—of course not. Yet this is a tendency all of us have—to just worry about most anything, and that takes us easily into the miserable what-ifs that I talked about earlier this week. Here’s what Jesus said about worrying:
“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. . . Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life? So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’. . . But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own (Matthew 6:25-31, 33-34).
This is a directive from Jesus: “Do not worry;” full stop! So that means when you worry, you are disobeying Jesus and believe me, that never ends well. Here’s what Jesus told us to do with our worrying situations:
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30).
Exchange your worrying burden for Jesus’ light one. You may have to do it several times a day, but when you start to worry, stop in the middle, remind yourself that you are disobeying Jesus, and then by an act of faith—not feelings—leave your worry with Jesus and take his light one. It works, I promise. You just have to do it.
Never underestimate the danger of disobedience. That is my next wise statement for you—things that I’ve heard or read that I resonate with and I need. And this is certainly one of those.
For those of us who are raising or have raised children, one of our continual challenges was to teach our children that obeying us was for their good, not to make their lives miserable—right? But it is not typically a readily-understood principle as our children grow. They often have to learn by experience that there is danger in disobedience.
And how often does our God have to remind us as his children that there is great danger in store for us when we willfully disobey or disregard his principles. What looks so enticing to begin with or so innocent and harmless can take us into sin that cripples us and keeps us in bondage.
Here’s the truth: Sin will take you farther than you want to go, keep you longer than you want to stay, and cost you more than you want to pay. You’ve heard it said that anything that is fun is either illegal, immoral or fattening. Well, that is so not true. Psalm 16:11 says: “You make known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.” It’s a lie from Satan that sin is fun and righteousness is boring. Satan is a liar and a very good one, and from the Garden of Eden to this day, he has lied about sin and its consequences. Sin is deceptive, destructive and deadly.
Yes, we have a forgiving God who is ready to forgive and restore us, but initial obedience is always better than asking for forgiveness later because the consequences of disobedience are still with you. You can choose your sin but you can’t choose its consequences.
So, is there some lingering sin in your life—some addiction—that has you in bondage? It looked so good at the beginning, so innocent, something you could handle for sure, but it hasn’t worked out that way. Proverbs 4:23 – 27 is really good advice:
Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.Keep your mouth free of perversity; keep corrupt talk far from your lips.Let your eyes look straight ahead; fix your gaze directly before you. Give careful thought to the paths for your feet and be steadfast in all your ways. Do not turn to the right or the left; keep your foot from evil.
Never underestimate the danger of disobedience. That is a wise word I hope you’ll remember.
This next wise statement is one I heard in a sermon recently, and it’s quite simple. You’ll probably find it unimpressive but think about it. The preacher said, “It’s no sacrifice when you get more than you give.”
He referred to this passage from Matthew 16:24 – 25:
Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. 25 For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it.”
Jesus always made it clear that there is a price to pay to follow him. Maybe you can name some prices that you have paid because you have chosen to make Jesus the Lord of your life. Perhaps some rejection by family or friends; maybe some promotions have been denied you. Certainly, there are Christians in the world who suffer continual persecution and whose lives are in peril because they follow Jesus.
The enemy of your soul wants you to believe that to live for Jesus, you must give up so much. I just want to remind you that you can never truly sacrifice anything for our Lord because what you get back in return is so much greater.
There is nothing we can offer Jesus that compares to the peace he gives us. If you have given your life to Jesus, you have received his peace that passes understanding. Unreasonable peace, I call it. And then there’s hope. Eternal hope—full assurance that you will spend eternity with our Lord. Nothing you could ever give to Jesus could match this sure knowledge that your future is secure. And joy—unfailing joy even in the midst of troubles or suffering—the joy that Jesus gives us—how could you ever put a price tag on that inward joy that comes from knowing Jesus.
So, my simple message is to remember that you can never sacrifice anything for Jesus—not in the true sense of giving up more than you get. That’s because any little or big thing you may give up for Jesus is overwhelmingly repaid with the gifts that he gives you in exchange.
So, don’t let the enemy lie to you and make you think you’ve sacrificed for Jesus. Jesus gave his life for you so that you could have life to the full—full of peace and hope and joy no matter what. You can’t call it a sacrifice if you get more than you give.
Recently in a prayer meeting with some sisters in Christ, one of my friends prayed, “Lord, Satan wants to put us into the what-ifs.” That stuck with me, and it’s one of my five wise statements.
Have you ever been stuck in the “what-ifs”? This is what James referred to when he wrote:
If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do (James 1:5 – 8).
You may ask God for wisdom, but if you are doubting when you ask, you should not expect God to give you wisdom. That’s what James tells us, and he describes people who doubt as being blown and tossed and unstable in all they do.
That’s what the what-ifs will do to you. One day you think you should do one thing; the next day you doubt if that is the right thing to do. Back and forth and back and forth—blown and tossed by fear. And you know that fear comes straight from Satan because God never gives us a spirit of fear. I repeat: Satan wants to put you into the what-ifs.
Another way the what-ifs work is to cause you to live in fear of what may or may not happen. So, you allow your mind to focus on those what-ifs instead of bringing your thoughts into captivity and thinking about things that are good and true, and soon you are stuck in that fear, worrying about the unknown, imagining the worst, and Satan is more than happy to leave you there.
Are you tired of living in the what-ifs? If so, here’s what you do: Cast all your care on the Lord because he cares for you, and leave them there, even if you must do that many times a day. And if you’re stuck in the what-ifs of some decision you need to make, seek godly wisdom, pray much, do your due diligence, and then take the first step out of the what-ifs and by faith, trust God’s wisdom in you.
God doesn’t want his children who have been set free from the bondage of sin to be trapped in the what-ifs. Is not a good place to be.
I want to share five wise statements with you. Each of these are things I’ve heard or read and they stuck with me. They make me think about my priorities and my time management and they reinforce some disciplines I need in my life, so I thought they might be helpful to you as well.
I heard a preacher say this recently: Kill complacency or it will kill you. Short and pithy—but oh so true. Complacency can be a killer. Complacency is not laziness, although if you are complacent, it could cause you to be lazy. But rather a complacent person is a self-satisfied person. When you are complacent you can be rather smug and uncritical of yourself.
The Apostle Paul wrote to young Timothy:
For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands. For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline (2Timothy 1:6-7).
The reason that Paul referred to was Timothy’s heritage. His mother and grandmother had fostered Timothy’s faith because of their sincere faith and now Paul was mentoring him and advising him. And he reminds Timothy not to be complacent. He notes that God had gifted him but it was his job to fan that gift into a flame.
Years ago, I wrote this passage in my prayer journal and began to pray that God would show me how to fan into a flame the gift of God in me. To not be satisfied with just being okay; to not settle for getting by. But to refuse to be complacent and content where I was in my spiritual growth.
If you’ve been born again, you’ve been given the Spirit of God indwelling you, and that Spirit gives you power, love and self-discipline. Self-discipline is a fruit of the Spirit and when you are self-disciplined, you will not be complacent.
So, my first wise thought is: Kill complacency or it will kill you. It will kill your self-discipline, your love for God and others and it will kill God’s power in you. Rather, fan into a flame the gift of God in you—whatever it is. Get better at it all the time. Kill complacency or it will kill you.
As followers of Jesus I think one of the biggest challenges we face, and one I can certainly come up against, is knowing and remembering how God sees you, how he feels about you and what God thinks about you. And when I say know, I am not talking about just intellectual or head knowledge, but really believing what God has declared about you. If you have been following Jesus for any length of time and you have read the Bible, I am pretty certain you have head knowledge about what God says about you through his Word. You may even be able to recite verses. But there is a huge difference between knowing what God says and receiving it, believing him, and living like it’s true!
When you don’t live from the truth that God has already spoken about you, it causes a whole lot of problems. It keeps you from living the life that Christ died to give you. Your life hinges on what you believe. And Jesus says in John 10:10, “I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” You simply cannot live the full and abundant life in Jesus if you don’t realize, fully receive, embrace, and strive to take hold of what your identity is in Christ. And throughout your lifetime on earth this will be one of the biggest battles you and I face, which means we need daily reminders.
As you remind yourself and re-ground your identity with the authority of God’s Word, the bottom line is this: It is God who has the first and final say on who you are. Your past does not get the final say.
What a parent or teacher said about you when you were a kid does not get the final say.
Anything you have done or anything that has been done to you does not define you and does not get the final say. Your failure, your sin, your successes, circumstances do not get the final say. Your thoughts about yourself, and what others say about you do not get the final say. What the culture tries to get you to believe about yourself and conform to does not get the final say.
None of these voices have any authority in or power over your life. Because as a follower of Jesus you are a child of God, and you were made in the image of a holy God.
All too often we can let our past, our circumstances, other people’s judgements or perspectives of us dictate who we are. While harsh, cruel and mean words may have been spoken over you or your past may be less than picture perfect, they don’t define you. And I declare right now that in the name of Jesus every word that does not align with the living and active Word of God has lost its power over you.
As Paul says in 2 Corinthians 10:5, “We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” When Paul writes these words in his letter to the believers in Corinth it is a strong exhortation, a warning that any and every teaching, word, or thought that does not align with God’s thoughts are to be torn down, held captive, submitted to and brought under the authority of Jesus. So when your thoughts, someone’s thoughts about you, or the world’s thoughts are not in agreement with your creator, the Lord God almighty himself, it is time to take action. Ask yourself, “Am I getting captured by my thoughts or am I taking my thoughts captive?” Your thoughts, consciously and unconsciously, will take root in your mind and heart unless you take them captive and cancel them out, replacing them with truth.
The other day I had a conversation with someone who had some pretty unkind things to say to me and when the call ended I felt an overwhelming sense of shame. Her words caused me to really doubt my skills. I felt like a failure. My mind started a downward spiral as I began to question my gifts and my calling. This 45-minute conversation jolted me and put my confidence on shaky ground. I allowed her opinions to have power over me and infiltrate my heart and mind. I ruminated on faulty words rather than focusing on what is true. I fixated on her criticism of me rather than fixing my eyes on Jesus and recalling his thoughts about me.
In these moments we have to ask ourselves, “God what is true? How do you see me?” This rattling showed me that I can still have a tendency to base my worth and identity on what people think of me. One of my biggest fears is being inadequate. I am driven by performance and being competent, wanting people to like me and think well of my capabilities. The impact this conversation had on me was like a check engine light on the dashboard of a car. It was alerting me of where I was temporarily misplacing my identity; in my performance and what others say about me, and not on the perspective of and solid foundation in Christ.
Where do you place your identity? Maybe you base your identity on things like success, wealth, power, your relational status, your job or title at work. You might place your worth in your physical appearance, your spouse or kids, how busy you are or how many people like your social media posts! When you place your identity in anything other than God you are up for great disappointment. A sudden job loss could leave you doubting your value. One piece of gossip aimed your way can debilitate you. Another thing that can mess with your identity is comparison. We can have a tendency to measure ourselves up against other people and their accomplishments rather than being grateful for the way God has uniquely gifted and called you.
I have friends with Harvard degrees, letters after their name, millions of dollars in their bank accounts, huge houses and social media fame. And you know what. It is very tempting for me to feel inadequate when I make other people my standard. Who or what are you comparing yourself to? Maybe you look at your friends who have bigger roles, job titles, and paychecks and that messes with your identity and worth. Or you are a mom, and you compare yourself to other moms who keep Instagram worthy homes, beautifully decorated while you are tripping over toys and can barely get dinner on the table after a long day’s work. Comparing yourself to other people is a dead-end street. I have heard it said that comparison is the thief of joy. It is also the thief of your calling because if you are so fixated on feeling inadequate because you do not think you measure up to some false standard you will miss out on the gifts and talents God has uniquely created you to put to use for his glory.
We try to gain our significance from our achievements, and God’s economy and valuation turns the world’s upside down. You do not have to hustle for your worth because your value is not determined by what you do or who you are but by whose you are!
And you are made in the image of the King of Kings and Lord of Lords which makes you royalty! It’s time to rediscover your true identity and let go of the self that seeks self-worth from other people, by doing things, achieving things, and feels a need to prove things. Because it’s so easy to fall into that trap and they do not identify you.
You have to remember that you have an enemy who wants to distract you and even worse take you out with thoughts that are untrue about who you are. We all have core beliefs that cause harmful consequences. It only takes a fraction of a second for the enemy to whisper lies and for you to fall hook line and sinker with words such as:
- You don’t measure up.
- You will never amount to anything.
- You are unqualified.
- You are not likable or loveable.
- You’re a failure.
- -You’re worthless.
- -You’re all alone.
- -Your sin can’t be forgiven.
- -You’re not smart enough, funny enough, thin enough, attractive enough.
I call a foul because that way of thinking goes against the very thoughts of God! When accusations come, who will you believe? Have some responses ready when the enemy attacks.
- “I am a child of God.”
- “I am the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus.”
- “I am the beloved of God in Christ Jesus.”
- “I am fearfully and wonderfully made.”
- “I am called by God and kept for Christ.”
- “God I am so loved by you!”
You’ve got to repeat these things to yourself and say them out loud! And get yourself into a position of worship. Don’t come up against lies in your own strength but battle them with praising God, the one who calls you by name. Live as one beloved, dearly loved by God. Because you are.
You will not always feel beloved but be determined to not be formed by your feelings but hold fast to what is true. Don’t believe everything you think. Don’t believe everything you feel. You are not your thoughts. You are not your feelings.
In Isaiah 55:8-9 God says, “’For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,’ declares the Lord. ‘For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.’”
Don’t live by what you feel, live by what you know. Live by what the Word of God says. I am not saying it is easy. This will take discipline on your part.
So, how do we live from truth? By not being obedient, compliant, or in agreement with thoughts that are informed by the world or someone else’s point of view, including your own. But instead, thinking God’s thoughts after him, which requires that we renew our minds with his Word.
A few years ago I created what I call a “truth card” that has a list of God’s character as well as Bible verses to remind me who I am in Jesus. It’s part of my artillery that I use to fight back when lies try to consume me. It’s a line of defense but also a line of offense and training my mind to dwell on what is true.
In order to remember who you are and live as the dearly loved child of God that you are, it is important that you recall the character of God, the one who created you and loves you, first.
There are no shortcuts to experiencing transformation in our minds and lives. We must fill our minds with God’s Word. As Jesus prayed to the Father, “Sanctify them by the truth; your Word is truth” (John 17:17).
Here is what is true about God, your Heavenly Father:
God is the Alpha and Omega the beginning and the end. He is personal and all-powerful. God is omnipresent. He is always with you. He is all-knowing and sovereign. He is in control and nothing can thwart his plans. God is holy. God is absolute truth. God is love. The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love. He is merciful, and faithful. God never changes. God is kind. He is the Prince of Peace. He is infinite. He is your provider and protector. He is your Jehovah-Nissi who gives you victory in Christ Jesus. He is wise. He is your El -Shaddai, all sufficient and Lord almighty. He is your comforter. Jesus is your Savior, Redeemer, Healer, Restorer. He is your strength. His Holy Spirit is your power, your counselor, your guide and your intercessor.
A.W. Tozer, a well-known pastor and author says, “What comes to mind when you think about God is the most important thing about you.” What you believe about who God is will inform what you believe about yourself.
Now hear what your Creator says about you. And visualize the face of Jesus.
You are God’s Daughter. You are God’s son. (John 1:12)
You are a saint. (1 Corinthians 1:2)
You bear God’s image. (Genesis 1:27)
You are fearfully and wonderfully made. (Psalm 139:14)
You are justified and accepted by God through Christ. (Romans 5:1)
Nothing can separate you from the love of God in Christ. (Romans 8:35)
God is for you. (Romans 8:31)
You have the mind of Christ. (1 Corinthians 2:16)
You are saved by grace, through faith in Jesus. This is not because of anything you have done or earned; it is the gift of God. (Ephesians 2:8)
You are being protected by God’s power through faith. (1 Peter 1:5)
Your old self has been crucified with Christ. It is no longer you who lives, but Christ lives in you. (Galatians 2:20)
You are blessed with every spiritual blessing in Christ. In Jesus you lack nothing. (Ephesians 1:3)
You are complete in Christ. (Colossians 2:9-10)
You are free from condemnation. (Romans 8:1-2)
The Holy Spirit helps you in your weakness and intercedes for you. (Romans 8:26)
God works all things for your good. (Romans 8:28)
You are loved by God to the core of your being. (Colossians 3:12)
You are completely accepted. (1 Peter 2:9)
You are blessed and surrounded by the favor of God.
You are deeply loved and highly favored. (Psalm 5:12)
God delights in you and rejoices over you with singing. (Zephaniah 3:17)
You are God’s friend. (John 15:15)
You are accepted. You are adopted. (Ephesians 1:5)
You do not have the spirit of fear. You have the spirit of power, love and a sound mind. (2 Timothy 1:7)
You have been redeemed by Jesus and all of your sins are completely forgiven. (Ephesians 1:7)
You are more than a conqueror in Christ Jesus. You are an overcomer and victor in Christ! (Romans 8:11, 37)
You are chosen and holy. When God looks at you he sees his treasured possession. (1 Peter 2:9)
You have been born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ. You have an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you. (1 Peter 1:1-3)
Take the time to meditate on his Word. As Psalm 1 says,
“Blessed is the one whose delight is in the Law of the Lord, who meditates on it day and night.”
I’ve been passing along some life lessons that God has taught me—and is still teaching me. You know, one of the characteristics of a godly, truly humble person is to be continually teachable.
Life Lesson No. 9: When you’re facing what seems like a disaster, ask yourself, “What difference will this make tomorrow—in five years—in eternity?”
This is a principle God began to teach me years ago—to have an eternal perspective, to see everything through “Forever Eyes.” Learning to live now in the light of eternity is one of the most life-changing things you will ever do. But I warn you, you have to be intentional about it and you have to work at it every day.
We so easily lose a realistic perspective when something is affecting us personally. Our emotions get all involved and we blow things out of proportion and we get very stressed over things that don’t really matter. In fact, I find that about 80% of what is bothering me at any given moment won’t even matter in 24 hours, much less five years!
Now obviously, there are times when we do face substantive disasters, but those are very few and far between, as a rule. And if we can learn to let go of all the stuff that doesn’t matter, we’ll be far better prepared to deal with the true trials that come our way. I strongly encourage you to put this life lesson into practice in your own life. Believe me, it will make a difference.
Life Lesson No. 10: When God gives you a passion, go for it!
If you want to be a speaker, look for opportunities to speak. If you want to be a writer, start writing. If you have a passion to be a counselor, figure out how to get the education you need and start. Don’t wait for someone to open the doors for you; if it’s a God-given passion, just somehow, someway go for it.
When God gave me a passion to start this radio ministry over thirty years ago, I had no idea how to start. I had no connections, no experience, no mentor. But I decided that I could no longer ignore that passion, and after much prayer, I determined to find out how to start a radio program. Once I stepped out on faith, God began to open the doors, and God has sustained us all these years. Don’t ignore God’s passions in your heart; don’t be afraid to take the next step and see what God wants to do.
I’m sharing some life lessons with you. I’m sure you’ve learned some valuable lessons in your own life, and it might be good to write them down somewhere. I’ve shared six of my life lessons so far, and here are the next two.
Life Lesson No. 7: Believe it or not, you’re not indispensable. Life will go on without you.
I remember some years ago when I was directing the handbell choir at our church. I loved it, and the church seemed to really love hearing the handbells. Then after I began this ministry my life became so busy that I realized I had to give it up.
I thought, “Oh, dear, the handbell choir will be no more because they won’t have me as their leader.” Wrong! The handbell choir is much bigger now, much better, and they have a director who is far more experienced and talented at handbells than I am! I was not indispensable. And indeed by stepping aside, I gave someone else an opportunity to use their gifts in the church.
So, don’t be afraid to let go; others can pick up the ball and carry on even without you! There’s only one person in control of the universe, and it’s not you!
Life Lesson No. 8: Don’t be afraid to ask. The worse they can say is “no.”
James wrote, “You do not have, because you do not ask God” (James 4:2b). And Jesus said, “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened” (Luke 11:9-10).
I could tell you many stories of situations where I’ve just revved up my nerve and asked for something which seemed impossible, and I got it simply because I asked. Obviously I’m not talking about asking for things for myself, but asking for appropriate things for the ministry or for others. I don’t find it easy to ask. I really have to make myself do it, because I either get intimidated or I think it will appear inappropriate, or in many cases, I just don’t want to humble myself and ask. But I’ve learned that many times people want to be asked and enjoy giving.
Those of us who are parents know how we love for our children—even the grown ones—to ask us to help them, in moderation, of course. So, don’t be afraid to ask. Even if you are turned down, you’re no worse off! As James said, often we don’t have simply because we’re afraid to ask.
What lessons has life taught you? I’m sharing ten life lessons I’ve learned—and am still learning!
Life Lesson No. 5: Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
I often remind myself that people aren’t thinking about me nearly as much as I think they’re thinking about me! Isn’t it true that we often put ourselves under unnecessary stress by just taking ourselves too seriously! We worry about what others will think of us and that can become an obsession.
Here’s the secret: Make it your passion to care very much about what God thinks about you. Pray daily that God will grow you into the mature Christian he wants you to be. Let God’s Word reveal areas in your life that need changing, and then by God’s grace, work on them. Care very much about what God thinks about you.
But stop worrying about what others think about you. Stop imagining what they’re thinking or saying. First of all, you’ll never please everyone, no matter how hard you try. And secondly, have you ever thought about how wrong it is to care more about what other people think of you than you do about what God thinks about you? Remember, it’s not all about you; it’s all about God and what he wants to do with your life. So, don’t take yourself so seriously.
Life Lesson No. 6: Make every day a special occasion: burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the new shoes.
How many things do you have tucked away, saving them for a special occasion? Recently I found some beautiful soap someone had given me, probably years ago, and I had put it away for a “special occasion,” and now it was so old and hard that it wasn’t really useful. I think my mother taught me to “save things for special occasions.” She was raised during the depression, and when she got something nice, she just had a tendency to squirrel it away rather than use it and enjoy it.
You’ve heard people say, “Life’s short; eat dessert first.” Well, life is short, and while we need to be frugal and saving, we also need to celebrate life and enjoy the good things God has given us. We need to make our everyday lives special and teach this to our children as well. Paul wrote to Timothy that God “richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment” (1 Timothy 6:17b).
So, make today special. Tomorrow is not promised to you, so enjoy today.
Life does teach us some lessons, does it not? I’m sharing ten life lessons that God has taught me along the way.
Life Lesson No. 3: Pay off your credit cards every month.
Financial troubles affect every area of our lives, and most people’s financial troubles begin with that plastic card. The credit card companies make it easier and easier for us to get a card and then they do everything to encourage us to use it, and then just pay the minimum each month. That is a recipe for financial disaster.
Could it be that you are in financial trouble now because you’ve got so much credit card debt? What do you do? First, stop using that credit card. Look at where your money is going and eliminate those things you don’t absolutely have to have. Then stop buying things you really don’t need until you have paid off those credit cards. And believe me, we all need a lot less than we think we do.
Credit cards are convenient, especially for travel, but I’ve had a rule for years that I must pay off my credit card bill every month. I just refuse to pay any interest. That puts controls on what I spend. One of the biggest favors you can do for yourself is to wipe out that credit card debt and then pay it off in full every month.
Life Lesson No. 4: Save something from every paycheck.
Frankly, I have not followed this principle all my life; I wish I had. But it’s never too late, and I practice this faithfully now. The secret is to have money taken out of your paycheck or your checking account every month—before you see it. I don’t care how small it is, make yourself start the habit of saving some money out of every paycheck, and put that money in an account that you don’t touch. Just forget it’s there.
Financial experts tell us we should save enough money to cover six months of expenses for emergencies. Now, it may take you awhile to get there, but you’ll never get there if you don’t start. So, make yourself begin with your next paycheck to save some money, and teach this principle to your children. Of course, giving to God is the first thing we should do with our paychecks. He should get the firstfruits of everything he has given to us, and ten percent is a good standard to use.
You know, the Bible has more to say about money than almost any other topic. That’s because where our money is indicates where our heart is! I promise you, if you will pray about this and get serious about getting your financial house in order, it will take so much stress and strain out of your life. I encourage you to do it.
One of the benefits of adding years to your life is that you really do learn a few things along the way—life lessons, if you will. So, I want to pass along ten life lessons I’ve learned, and perhaps they may be helpful to you.
Life Lesson No. 1: When you are not sure what to do, just take the next small step.
You know, life is full of turning points, small and large—times when you have to make a decision and you’re not sure about it. I’m not talking about black and white decisions, things that are clearly right or wrong. But other decisions like: Should I look for a new job or not? Should I offer to give this person some money? Is it time to sell my house?
Of course, prayer is our first order of business when we’re faced with decisions, and it’s always helpful to seek advice from trusted advisors. But I’ve often found that if I take the next small step and then see where that leads, I can usually tell whether it is the right thing or not. And sometimes I discover there really is no next small step; I would have to push and shove and maneuver to get to that next step. That’s always a red flag for me that says, “Slow down; make sure this is a good step to take.”
I think many people park-out at the starting line, thinking about what they might do, wanting to do something, but because of fear or double-mindedness, they never move. James says that a double-minded person is unstable in all her ways. Double-mindedness is that state of mind where you go back and forth and back and forth, but you never move forward! So, don’t be afraid to take that first step and see where it leads.
Life Lesson No. 2: Live in today rather than yesterday or tomorrow.
Jesus said, “Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own” (Matthew 6:34). Most of our stress and depression comes because we live either in the past, with regrets and anger, or we live in fear of the future. God gives us the strength to cope with today, but we keep adding on the past and the future and wonder why we can’t make it!
Yesterday is gone. You can’t change it; you can’t make it better. In Isaiah 43 the Lord said, “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See I am doing a new thing!” (Isaiah 43:18-19a). If you continually dwell on the past, you will miss the new thing God wants to do for you. Yesterday is over; let it go.
Tomorrow never comes. Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday! Fear of the future will absolutely stop you from the good things God has for you.
So, pray daily that you will live in the present, and then you’ll have the strength to make it through. It’s a matter of changing your attitude and your thought patterns.
It’s very easy for any of us to fall into a trap of comparing ourselves to other people. We see it all around us, especially on our jobs. But the consequences can be devastating, and sinful as well.
Usually when we compare ourselves to others, we come to one of three conclusions:
- First, we conclude that we’re better than they are.
- Or we decide that they’re better than we are.
- And that leads us into thinking we’d rather be them than us since they are better than we are.
Think, first of all, about the parable of the Pharisee and the Tax Collector, as given in Luke 18:9-14:
To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everyone else, Jesus told this parable:“Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector.The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other people—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’
“But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’
“I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God.
We look at this Pharisee and think, “How awful!” And yet how easy it is for us to compare ourselves to others with that same type of attitude. Like the Pharisee, we compare outward appearances and end up thinking we’re pretty hot stuff. That kind of comparison leads us to a false security about ourselves and it leads us into pride.
Have you noticed how insidiously pride creeps into our thinking? Have you been looking at others lately and thinking: “Well, I look better than she does,” or “I perform better than he does,” or “I’ve got more to offer than they do.” When you make these kinds of comparisons, the sin of pride is taking over your mind. Jesus said at the end of this parable: “For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted” (Luke 18:14b).
Listen to yourself think and talk and see how often you compare yourself to others and end up feeling pretty proud of yourself. It’s a very dangerous road to be on. The Apostle Paul wrote to the Philippians that they should consider others more important than themselves. That’s the attitude we need to have toward others.
What I find is particularly prevalent among business people is that they compare their positions and our salaries, and think they’re more important than others because they’ve climbed the ladder higher or gotten another raise. Certainly, that’s one of the real dangers we face if we are ambitious—the sin of pride in thinking that we’re better than others because we’ve got a bigger salary or a better title.
Remember that in eternity those titles and salaries will have no meaning. Everything we are and have are gifts from God to us. We truly can take no credit for our abilities or accomplishments. Paul wrote to the Corinthian believers:
For who makes you different from anyone else? What do you have that you did not receive? And if you did receive it, why do you boast as though you did not? (1 Corinthians 4:7).
So, that’s one deadly result of the sin of comparison—we think we’re better than others. Secondly, comparing ourselves to others can lead us to think that others are better than us. Consider the parable of the talents that Jesus gave us (Matthew 25:14-28). Before leaving on a long trip, the Master gives three servants certain talents, or resources. One servant received five talents, one two, and the third servant received only one talent.
When the master returned, he asked each of them to give an account of what they had done with those resources. The first servant reported that his five talents were now ten; the second servant similarly reported that his two talents were now four. But what about the third servant? He had taken his one talent and done nothing with it, and he had to report to the master that because he was afraid of losing it, he had hidden it and it was still only one. After all, he had only one and the other two had much more than he did, so in comparison to them, his one talent was nothing—that’s what he was thinking.
The Master rewards the first two servants equally: “Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful in a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness” (Matthew 25:21,23). Even though one had ten and one had only four, they got the same exact reward.
But what does the master say to the third servant? It’s a very strong condemnation: “You wicked, lazy servant!…Take the talent from him and give it to the one who has ten talents!” (Matthew 25:26). Now what can we learn from this?
The lesson here is that God does not compare us with others, but he does expect us to make very good use of the resources that have been given to us. This servant could have had the same reward that the others received had he simply taken his one talent and multiplied it. He wasn’t required to multiply his one into ten, only into two.
Are you failing to use what God has given you? Do you compare yourself to others and conclude that they are better than you, they have more to work with than you do, they’ve got it easy and you’ve got it hard? Whether you have more or less than other people is inconsequential. You will be required to account for your own resources, no one else’s.
Notice what happened to this third servant as a result of his attitude of comparing himself to those who had more:
- First, we notice that it made him fearful (Matthew 25:25). He was afraid to lose the talent he had, since he compared and saw that he had only one. And that fear led him to a very irrational, unreasonable course of action. Knowing that the master was demanding and expected him to multiply his talents, he decided to dig a hole and hide it.
- Second, he became lazy. The master called him a lazy servant (Matthew 25:26). When we compare ourselves to others who have more than we do, this will frequently happen. We lose our motivation, we lose our initiative, and we become lazy.
- Third, it led him into sin. The master identified him as wicked, because he had failed to do what he knew he should do (Matthew 25:26). In James 4:17 we read: “If anyone, then, knows the good they ought to do and doesn’t do it, it is sin for them.”
- Fourth, he lost what he had. His worst fear was realized; the master took his one talent and gave it to the man with ten (Matthew 25:28).
- Fifth, he lost his reward (Matthew 25:29b). Had he multiplied his one talent into two, had he been as good a steward of what he had as the others, even though the end result was only two talents, he would have received the same reward as the others, and would have been given more. But he lost his reward because he compared himself to those who had more, decided there was nothing much he could do with what he had, became fearful and lazy, and lost all he had.
Comparing yourself to others can easily cause you to be envious and jealous. I think of the time when Peter fell into this trap after Jesus had risen and was about to ascend back to Heaven. Jesus told Peter that he had plans to use him mightily, but also informed him that he would be required to suffer for the Lord. His prophecy to Peter was: “When you are old you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go. Jesus said this to indicate the kind of death by which Peter would glorify God” (John 21:18-19).
Then Peter made the mistake of comparing himself to John. Peter asked Jesus, “What about John?” Jesus answered, “If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me?” (John 21:21-22).
I think we can all empathize with Peter because we’ve been there. When something bad happens to us, we tend to think, “Well, what about John? Why should I have to endure all this? John’s no better than me. Don’t I deserve a break today, Lord? At least make everyone else suffer just like me.”
We just must once again acknowledge that God is Sovereign and he does as he pleases. It is his prerogative to lead each of us in whatever paths he chooses. When we start looking at others and thinking they’ve got it easy and we’ve got it hard, then we’re in for trouble. That is envy, that is lack of trust, that is sin.
So many people today think that God is their servant, there to do their bidding. And when he doesn’t come through with equal pay or equal treatment, when they see that someone else has it better or easier, they get upset. Somehow we have to get back to a basic understanding: God is King, we are his servants. He is the one who calls the plays in our lives, not us. And if our lot looks more difficult than others, so be it. As with Peter, the purpose is to glorify God.
Comparing ourselves to others often leads us to envy, and envy leads us into blaming God. Sometimes people will flippantly say “I’m angry with God.” I recognize there are times when those emotions are a part of a transition period when we’ve had a great disappointment or disaster in our lives. But the true servant of God, the person who has a real understanding of who God is, must soon come to the place where he or she says, “He is God, and he does as he pleases. I am his servant.”
When I find myself falling into this pattern of thinking and comparing myself to others and wondering why I can’t have things as easy as they do, I try to immediately remember what Jesus said to Peter, and I say to myself: “What is that to you, Mary? It’s none of your business how God chooses to treat other people. Your job is simply to obey the Lord so that he will be glorified in your life.”
Well, have you been comparing yourself to others? Ask God to forgive you and set you free because it is a sin that enslaves you and causes you to be miserable. Let’s agree that by God’s grace we’ll learn to be thankful for who we are and how God has blessed us, multiplying the resources he has given us to bring glory to his name.
Presented by Lisa Bishop
It’s easy to try to get our identity from all the wrong places rather than from the very of truth of God. And when it comes to identity, we can get hyper-focused on ourselves when we were created to fix our eyes on Jesus.
During my quiet time I found myself meditating on a familiar passage in 1 Peter. As a bit of background, the apostle Peter is writing this letter to God’s elect. Strangers in the world (those who look out of place to the world because they do not follow its customs) who God chose before creation for “obedience to Jesus Christ.” In other words, Peter is penning this letter to believers like you and me. Men and women who have been born again. Those called to a living hope in Jesus and to be a living hope displaying Jesus to a corrupt world that denies Him with its evil practices. Much like the world we are living in today.
Peter is essentially saying, “don’t follow the world, obey the Word and set yourself apart.” And that is where we come to 1 Peter 2:9: “But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.”
As I read this passage these words came to mind, “It’s not about you.” Let me explain. While it is absolutely essential that you are confident in your identity in Christ, the reason that God has set you apart and made you holy is to reveal his glory.
You are chosen, holy and fully possessed by God in order that you proclaim the name of Jesus with your life. And if you are not living from your identity in him, people around you will miss out on experiencing Jesus in you. You are the Imago Dei. You reveal Christ to a world in desperate need of hope.
It’s not about you. It’s about Jesus.
What if you lived out your calling as an ambassador for Christ. Sharing your testimony of how God called you out of darkness into his marvelous light, displaying hope to your neighbors, coworkers, kids, and the cashier at the grocery store.
This does not mean you will live a perfect life but a credible life as one following after the heart of God. How will you stand firm in your identity in him and declaring his praise to those around you?
Presented by Lisa Bishop
Has anyone ever said something hurtful about you that you had a hard time shaking loose? I want to talk about lies others have spoken about you or over you that have negatively impacted how you see yourself.
When I was growing up there was a saying, “Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me.” You’ve probably heard it. I don’t know who made that little jingle up but it couldn’t be farther from the truth. Often, healing from painful words that have been hurled at you can be a much harder process than mending from a physical injury. Because words hurt. They wound. And if you are not careful you can internalize them and they will become part of your identity.
I will never forget coming back from summer break and entering into my second year of middle school. As if middle school was not brutal enough, living through the awkward phases and just having an overall feeling of insecurity, what one of the 8th grade boys said to me stuck with me for a long time. He looked across the cafeteria and shouted, “Hey, Bishop, you actually kind of look good this year.” Needless to say, I was mortified. I am not certain of the full intention of his words but this is what I heard when his words thundered across the room, “Hey Lisa, you were really ugly and unattractive last year but this year you’re not so bad.” Let’s just say that is not something an already self-conscious 8th grade girl wants to hear. I still remember his words 40 years later like it was yesterday. Thankfully they no longer have an impact on me, but they did for years. I internalized his view of me and allowed them to feed into my insecurity and inform my identity. Ugly. Not chosen. Overlooked. Undesirable. I know it may seem silly now, but the reality is, words sting. And if you are not fully grounded in your identity in Jesus, people’s careless words can stick to you like glue and you will start believing they are true.
What hateful, harsh, or harming words have been spoken over you and into your life? Maybe they were reckless words released from a parent, teacher, boss, spouse, or friend. What has someone said to you that you have consciously or unconsciously taken in as truth? What lies have you let settle in that have impacted the way you see yourself and are not in alignment with what God says about you? It takes intentionality to name the lies and rehearse the truth. And the truth is you are made in God’s image as Genesis 1:27 says, “So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.”
And Psalm 139:13-14: For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful.” The bigger picture here is knowing who God is and he does not make mistakes. What words need healing from Jesus? Bring them to the cross, release them to Jesus, rebuke them and rehearse what is true. Release. Rebuke. Rehearse. Thank God for who he is and how he has made you.
Presented by Lisa Bishop
Are you living in fear today or are you living by faith?
It can be so easy to let anxiety, worry, and fear overwhelm you when life is hard and your circumstances look bleak. Whether it’s a job loss or negative performance review, you’ve been blindsided by a breakup, your kids are wayward, or your marriage is on the brinks–there is no end to the list of concerns that can consume you on a daily basis and it can be easy to slip into worry and fear of the future.
I read a quote the other day that stood out to me. It said, “The antidote of fear is the presence of God.” The definition of antidote is, “an agent that counteracts a poison.” If you think about it, fear is a poison. It aims to pollute your mind, cloud your vision, and destroy your hope. To cancel out fear, remember that as a follower of Jesus, you cohabitate with God! He is omnipresent which means his presence is everywhere. He never leaves you, He is always with you, Jesus is always by your side. The problem is when we fret, we forget.
When your mind gets caught in the hamster wheel of worry it will take intentionality to turn your thoughts to God and remember his presence.
It reminds me of Psalm 23. The Psalmist in his deep distress declares, “Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me” (Psalm 23:4 NLT). Sometimes we just want the difficulties in life to go away. I’ve got some bad news for you. It doesn’t. But the good news is that we have hope in the darkness and his name is Jesus!
In the midst of darkness, the Psalmist remembers the presence of God and it is a reminder and encouragement for you to do the same. I know that you do not always feel God’s presence so that can cause you to doubt his nearness. But this is where you can’t allow your feelings to inform your faith, but instead determine to focus on what is true. Snap yourself out of your distress and direct your attention to the prescription for peace found in Philippians 4:6-7:
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
When you feel distress trying to take up residence in your mind, instead of giving into fear, fight back with prayer. Don’t let anxiety win. Start praising God. Thank him that he is near. Thank him for his peace and presence. One of my favorite worship songs is, “Raise a Hallelujah.” I crank it up when I need a reminder to praise in the midst of the darkness. Let these lyrics be your anthem in the worries of life.
“I raise a hallelujah, with everything inside of me
I raise a hallelujah, I will watch the darkness flee
I raise a hallelujah, my weapon is a melody.
I raise a hallelujah, fear you lost your hold on me!”
Presented by Lisa Bishop
Are you living a transformed life in Jesus Christ?
The other day I was at my mom’s house. We got into a bit of a disagreement about something. We didn’t see eye to eye. She asked if we could talk to which I obliged but I am sorry to say that I became a bit impatient in the conversation. I reacted from my flesh and not in the fruit of the Holy Spirit. I’m guessing you can relate.
Galatians 5:22-23 says, “The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.”
The Holy Spirit kindly convicted me that I was not bearing much fruit in my response to my mom. He kindly and gently reminded me what it looks like to live from my identity in Christ. You and I are made in God’s image and his number one priority as followers of Jesus is to make us more like him. To radically transform us into his likeness. It reminds me of growing up as a kid, I looked a lot like my dad. People would always comment on how much I resembled my father. We had a lot of the same features; people knew I was my dad’s daughter. As a son or daughter of Jesus, you are meant to look like him, which means that when people see you and interact with you, they will encounter Jesus in your words, attitudes, behavior and responses.
I certainly did not take the opportunity to reflect Jesus with my mom. There will be times that you and I will miss the mark in our interactions with people because transformation is a process. A process of becoming who you already are in Christ. The important thing to consider is this. Are you making it your aim to grow more and more into the likeness of Jesus?
An increase of the fruit of the Holy Spirit in your life is evidence of spiritual growth and maturity. Where old patterns of reacting will be broken and an increase of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, and self-control will flow from you.
I am a work in progress and so are you. God knows that and he wants to help you as you grow in reflecting him. Remember what Romans 8:26 says, “The Spirit helps us in our weakness.”
What fruit of the Spirit is God inviting you to grow in? Take a look at the past few interactions you have had with people in your life. What flesh response does the Holy Spirit want to transform into a fruit response? Confess where you are falling short and ask God for help as you become more like him.
Presented by Lisa Bishop
Have you ever felt unqualified? That sinking feeling like you just do not measure up? Recently a friend was sharing how she had been experiencing anxiety in her job. She went from being an individual contributor to being promoted to VP and leading a team of people. Even though God had clearly opened this career door and called her into this position, her new role had induced a case of imposter syndrome.
If you have ever felt like you didn’t deserve a raise, that you are not smart or qualified enough to succeed at an assignment, or that you fooled everyone when you landed a new job or position, you too have experienced imposter syndrome. Imposter syndrome is when you doubt your competency and ability to do your job. It’s the feeling that you don’t deserve to be in the position you are in because you are not qualified. If you have ever felt this way you are not alone. This type of self-doubt affects millions of people across various demographics and job types. Imposter syndrome messes with your identity because of the fear of inadequacy and sinking feeling of being found out to not have “what it takes.”
When I think about imposter syndrome it reminds me of Moses. In Exodus chapter 3 we read the familiar story of God revealing himself to Moses in a burning bush. This was the beginning of God’s call on Moses’s life to be the one who would bring redemption to God’s people and lead the Israelites out of slavery in Egypt. In Exodus 3:11 we see Moses grappling with his version of imposter syndrome when in response to God’s assignment he says, “Who am I that I should go to Pharaoh and bring the Israelites out of Egypt?” To which God responds, “I will be with you” (Exodus 3:12a). Regardless of God’s continued reassurance that he will be with Moses, equipping him and leading him every step of the way, Moses’s fear and doubt induces an endless list of rebuttals as to why he is not qualified for the position God is calling him to.
- “What if they don’t believe me or listen to me?” (Exodus 4:1a).
- “Pardon your servant Lord. I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue” (Exodus 4:10).
- “Pardon Your servant Lord, please send someone else” (Exodus 4:13).
When God invites you into a new opportunity you might be tempted to let imposter syndrome cause you to shrink back and like Moses, say “Who am I?” Know that God isn’t surprised by your imposter syndrome, he just asks you to say, “Yes!” God was not sending Moses in his own strength but by the power of the Lord. God is not sending you in your own strength but inviting you to trust in and rely on him.
When God calls you into something, remember it is ultimately for his glory. You can trust him as he calls you to partner with him.
This is an incredible truth that we often just take for granted, or it’s become so familiar that we don’t grasp the depth of it. But try to focus on this—the marvelous fact that you are loved—individually and personally—by Jesus, by our Heavenly Father.
Five times in his Gospel, the Apostle John referred to himself as the one whom Jesus loves. These all occurred on the day before his crucifixion and immediately after his resurrection. For example, John writes about this scene at the cross:
John 19:26: When Jesus saw his mother there, and the disciple whom he loved standing nearby, he said to her, “Woman, here is your son,”
And then he writes about the time when he and Peter were fishing in the Sea of Galilee, and Jesus appeared them in his resurrected body:
John 21:7: Then the disciple whom Jesus loved said to Peter, “It is the Lord!” As soon as Simon Peter heard him say, “It is the Lord,” he wrapped his outer garment around him (for he had taken it off) and jumped into the water.
No other disciple referred to himself in that way, as the one Jesus loved. Why did John choose that description? Well, it wasn’t because he thought Jesus loved him better than anyone else. It was simply because that was his identity—an identity that was grounded in knowing that Jesus loved him. If you asked him, “Who are you?,” he would say, “I am the one Jesus loves.”
This is something I’ve talked about a good deal to the women in my church, where I served as director of women’s ministries. After studying John, we began the tradition of starting every class asking: Sisters in Christ, who are you? And they readily and heartily reply: I am the one Jesus loves. It’s a great way to encourage each other to remember who you are in Christ. If you know Jesus in a personal relationship and you’ve placed your trust in him, then you can join with us in this joyous declaration that you are the one Jesus loves. It should be your number one identity, the most important thing about you.
When Lazarus was ill, the sisters sent for Jesus and they said, “Lord, he whom you love is sick” (John 11:3). That was their approach to Jesus—they appealed on the basis that they knew Jesus loved Lazarus. They didn’t even mention his name because they knew Jesus would know who they were talking about. They were totally confident that Jesus loved Lazarus, and they appealed to him on that basis.
Maybe this should inform us in our own prayer lives. How do you approach Jesus when you pray? Do you ever pray: Lord, the one you love needs you. Or Lord, I come to you because I’m the one you love and I know you care about me. I’ve begun to do this, and it has a beautiful effect on my prayer time. You begin with your one credential, that one thing that qualifies you to present your requests to God: Lord, I’m the one you love. It establishes that family relationship you have and reminds you that your heavenly Father invites you to come into his presence with confidence and boldness and approach his throne where you’ll receive mercy and find grace to help you in your time of need (Hebrews 4:16).
What difference will it make in your everyday life if you truly bask in the daily knowledge that you are the one Jesus loves? Judah Smith writes: “People who know that Jesus loves them, who know that Jesus is with them and for them—those people can not only endure pain and loss and difficulty, they can come out the other side stronger and better people” (Jesus Is_______ pg. 159).
It will indeed get you through some tough times and cause you to be victorious. It will make you sit up straighter and hold your head up higher, not from pride or self-righteousness, but from gratitude and joy in knowing that you are the one Jesus loves. So, regardless of what’s going on around you or what other people think, you are less and less vulnerable to their opinions and more and more confident of who you are in Christ.
And here’s a really important point: When we are sure of God’s love for us, we are set free to love others. And this is how the world knows that we are disciples of Jesus Christ—by the love we have for others. But when we are not totally confident that we are loved by God, life is just all about us, about our need to be loved, about trying to find something or someone to fill up that empty place inside of us—the place that only Jesus can fill.
One of the great side benefits of seeing your identity as the one Jesus loves, and living in the freedom of that knowledge, is that it just sets you free from yourself. Did you realize that you are the biggest problem you have? It’s true for all of us. And when you can get over yourself, when you are so confident that you’re valued and special and significant because you are loved by Jesus, then you simply are going to move into the joy of self-forgetfulness. And when you don’t have to think about yourself so much, you are set free to think about others.
We can’t really love others the way we should until we are totally confident that we are the one Jesus loves. Our human love runs out quickly; there’s not enough in us to give love to others freely and joyfully—at least not for very long. It is when the love of Christ is spread inside us, filling us, completing us, giving us joy and purpose, that we are able to pass it on to others.
There’s an old song that says, “I am loved, I am loved, I can risk loving you, for the one who knows me best, loves me most.” And the truth is, when we are confident in God’s love for us, when we know that we are the one Jesus loves, we can risk loving others. We want to love others.
Romans 5:5: Then. . .we are able to hold our heads high no matter what happens and know that all is well, for we know how dearly God loves us, and we feel this warm love everywhere within us because God has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love. (Living Bible)
Can you see how important it is to really know that you are the one Jesus loves? Just as I was writing this message, I received a text from a dear friend asking me to pray for her right at that moment, as she was facing a very tight deadline at work and was under a lot of stress. By the way, it’s great to have the kind of friendship where you can ask for immediate prayer from a good friend. So, I stopped and prayed for her and then texted her back, “Remember, you are the one Jesus loves.” And she replied, “Thanks so much for that reminder. I will keep saying that today.”
That’s what I mean by living in the knowledge that you are the one Jesus loves. You see, the enemy of your soul certainly doesn’t want you to remember this. He knows that this will give you courage and strength and make you far less vulnerable to his flaming arrows. So, you defeat him by simply making it a daily habit to repeat—and repeat often—that you are the one Jesus loves.
If you don’t have that sure knowledge, if it hasn’t made a difference in your life to know that Jesus loves you, then it could be because you don’t yet really have an established relationship with God through Jesus. You haven’t yet become a member of God’s family through faith in Jesus Christ. That, of course, is step one.
Or it could be that you are a Christian, a sincere Christ-follower, but you haven’t gotten to know God very well. You haven’t made getting to know God a high priority in your life, and so you don’t spend much time in Bible study or fellowship with other believers or giving of yourself to others for Christ’s sake.
You see, the more you know God through Jesus, the more you love him and the more you understand his love for you. The more you value the knowledge that you are the one Jesus loves.
You can never short-change the input of God’s Word into your life and expect to be firmly grounded in who you are in Christ. But if you will make that a priority, to get to know Jesus better and better through his Word and fellowship and Bible teaching, and if you will begin to tell yourself daily that you are the one Jesus loves, I promise you’re going to move in a new direction with God.
I know—we can talk about your baggage, we can talk about your circumstances and your past, we can talk about all the mistakes you’ve made and the things that are missing in your life; we can bring up all the wrong that’s been done to you. But what good does it do to focus on that?
True, some things in our pasts have to be confronted and understood so that we can put them behind us, but the baggage of your past will never bring you to the abundant life that Jesus wants you to have. Instead, to begin to truly see yourself as the one Jesus loves is the best thing you can do to find healing and put all that behind you.
The Apostle John—the one Jesus loved—also wrote three letters which are part of the Holy Scriptures, and again he focuses those letters on how God loves us. Here are two passages from those letters:
See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! (1 John 3:1)
This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins (1 John 4:10). We love because he first loved us (1 John 4:19).
I invite you—I urge you—to find your identity in the marvelous truth that you are the one Jesus loves. And when you do, you will be able to love because you will be so secure in knowing that you are the one Jesus loves.
It is important for us as Christians to understand that we are each uniquely and specially made by God for good reasons. We are not mistakes; I am who I am by design of God, and you are who you are by that same eternal plan and design.
God looked at his creation, we read in Genesis, and declared that it was good! Since we’re part of that creation, we can learn to accept who we are as created by God as good and right.
Now let me add that learning to accept who we are doesn’t mean we give up on trying to improve. While it’s true God has given me a certain type of personality, it’s also true that my personality has a lot of rough edges that need polishing. We have to remember that sin has affected God’s perfect creation, and so until we get to heaven, we are damaged by sin.
The Apostle Paul told us we are in the process of being conformed to the image of God’s Son, Jesus Christ. So, using the personalities given to us, the gifts and abilities that have been entrusted to us by God, we are to be constantly growing into the image of Jesus.
Remember, that when you can accept yourself and believe that God has made you for special and unique purposes, then you’re free. Now the person God has created starts to shine through beautifully; now you begin to see just why God made you the way you are, now you discover that there was a lot there you didn’t even recognize before. God is free to work in and through you, to keep shaping you into the image of Jesus. And you’re free to say, “Thank you, Jesus, you didn’t make a mistake when you made me. Now, please take what you have made and use it for the purposes you intended.”
If you have been trying to be someone else or you feel as though what you are is second-best, a mistake, I encourage you to go to God in prayer right now, as soon as possible. Confess your lack of trust in his creative abilities, ask him to forgive you, and give him permission to continue to conform you to the image of Jesus Christ for eternal and significant purposes.
If you will do that, and continue to do that each day, you’re going to discover incredible and marvelous freedom, and the real you God has created will be a joy to everyone, including yourself.
Do you find yourself frequently wishing you were someone else? Do you often feel that a different personality would be much better than the one you have? Well, if that’s true, then not only are you prevented from knowing and appreciating the uniqueness of who you are as created by God, but it keeps you from being able to appreciate others as well.
I know that as I’ve begun to learn to accept that who I am is not a mistake, but rather a plan in God’s eternal purpose, I am able to look at other people with a much-changed attitude. Now those who are very different from me no longer present a threat nor cause me to feel inadequate or short-changed.
Now when I see people whose personalities and gifts I admire, I can just enjoy them for who they are. I don’t have to compete with them, I don’t have to feel jealous or envious, because I know that they are unique for God’s purposes and so am I.
Can you see what freedom and happiness that can bring into your life, when you are able to appreciate who you are? You are free from that foreboding sense that something is wrong with you; you are free not to have to think or worry about yourself all the time; you are free to be involved with others. You are free from the pain of jealousy and envy, and the dreariness of self-pity.
And then when you can accept that you were created by God just the way you are for his good purposes, you’re also able to understand that God has made us all very different for good reasons. Sometimes we subconsciously think that everybody should be like us—think like us, feel like us, see everything the way we do. But that’s not how God has created us.
I’m reminded that it would not have been good if we were all alike. God is so incredibly creative, that it is no problem at all for him to design each of us as unique people, no two of us alike. How wonderful, how marvelous.
Will you ask God to help you appreciate who you are? Will you ask him to set you free from trying to be someone else? Will you start consciously thanking God that you are who you are, and commit to him that you want to be all he has planned for you to be? That’s the way to have a contented and fruitful life.
It is essential that we believe and accept that God has created each of us to be exactly who we are, and what a mistake it is for us to try to be someone else. It’s a lesson I’ve had to learn—and keep learning—as I’ve often felt that a different personality would be better than the one I have.
You see, I always thought that my type of personality would have been much more acceptable for a man rather than a woman. I could be described as assertive, outgoing, entrepreneurial, energetic, with leadership qualities and take-charge tendencies. This personality didn’t seem to fit in with other people’s ideas of what a woman should be, especially in the Christian community. So, I was confused for quite awhile as to why I had this personality.
Then I began to learn that God had not made a mistake, he did not forget that I was a female when he designed me, and he had a purpose for designing me, a woman, the way I am. So, I began, little by little, to accept that God had made me just this way for some good purpose.
And as I’ve become more and more comfortable with who I am and the way I’ve been created, then I’ve learned to enjoy and appreciate who I am. You know, I don’t think I’d really want to be anyone else any longer. I like the way God created me.
Now, it’s okay to say that. It’s okay for you to say that about yourself. Go ahead; say it: I like the way God created me. All you’re doing is affirming that God doesn’t make mistakes, and you are pleased with his creation. That’s not pride, assuming your heart attitude is correct. That is simply thanking God for his creativity and recognizing that his creation is good.
God wants you to be pleased with the way he has created you, for it shows that you trust him. It shows that you believe his word is true and that the way you are created is the best, since it is God’s creation. Please understand that I’m not talking about thinking you’re better than anyone else or being unwilling to change and become all God has intended you to be. But you can appreciate who you are because you are God’s unique creation.
So, throughout your day, tell God: “I like the way you created me.” Learn to appreciate the uniqueness of you.
Have you ever wished you were someone very different than who you are? A different personality type altogether? Well, if you think about it, that attitude is like a slap in God’s face because it says you’re convinced God didn’t give you a fair shake, or else he made a mistake in the way he designed you.
Scripture tells us that we are fearfully and wonderfully made, that God knit us together in our mother’s womb, that he is intimately acquainted with us down to counting the hairs on our heads, and we are each created in his image. Now, just put all those facts in your head and consider what that means.
First of all, God didn’t make a mistake when he designed you. You were planned in the mind of God. You’re not an accident of nature. You are designed according to God’s plan.
Secondly, what you are is like what God is. You are created in the image of God. Now, don’t confuse this with teaching which says we’re all gods. That certainly is not true. But it is true that we are all created in God’s image. That means that God has traits like you and me. Part of God’s personality is just like your personality because you’re created in his image.
Now, please let that sink into your head, because it is very important that you understand this basic truth of Scripture. It should change your whole attitude toward who you are.
How can any of us be mistakes if each of us is individually created by a good and merciful God? How can we think that we’d be better off if we were like someone else, if we believe in a God who does not make mistakes, and a God who is good and loving?
Can you see how basic this is to your whole relationship with God? If you’ve been wishing you were someone else, I pray that you’ll thank God for who you are, and ask him to help you understand why you are who you are, and what wonderful and good purpose he has for you.
Did you ever wish you could change your whole personality and be like someone else? Maybe you’ve had the notion that if you were a different type of person, you’d be much better off. It’s a serious mistake we make when we try to be someone we are not.
The summer after my freshman year in college I thought I had the perfect opportunity to be someone else. I was going to be a counselor at a Christian camp where no one knew me, so I decided that instead of being the outgoing, assertive, take-charge type that I had been all my life, I would become the quiet, reserved, “sweet” type of person, just like a girl in my college. You see, it seemed to me that her type of personality was nicer and better liked than mine, so I decided to be like her.
I can still remember those first few days at camp, as I concentrated so hard on being someone else. I had to think about it all the time, so that I would remember to be different. Mostly I just forced myself to be quiet, and instead of impressing people with how nice I was, they thought I was unfriendly. I really tried hard to be just like my friend at school, but let me tell you, I failed miserably. I could only keep it up a few short days, and I had to face the fact that I was stuck with who I was.
Could it be that you are unhappy with who you are and you find yourself wanting to be like someone else? Maybe, like me, you’ve tried to change your personality and found it doesn’t work.
Well, did you ever stop and think about what it really means when you try to be like someone else? It means you think God made a mistake in the way he made you. It demonstrates a lack of trust in God’s wisdom; it says you think God was either wrong or cruel to make you the way you are.
I want to encourage you to know that you are unique; there’s no one else like you in the whole world. God is so infinitely creative, that he’s able to give each of us unique traits and personalities, and he has designed you to be yourself. He wants your personality, your type—you—to meet a certain need in the Kingdom of God.
Good news—wonderful news! You don’t have to be anyone else in order to be worthwhile, effective, and happy. There is great joy in just being who you are.
No theme has been more used—and abused—than the theme of love. Since the beginning of time, songs and poems have been written about love, movies and plays and novels by the millions have focused on this love theme. Obviously, love is very important to all of us. We all need and want to be loved. But have you ever thought about why we need love so much?
Here are a few of the reasons that we long for love:
- Knowing we are loved gives us comfort.
- Knowing we are loved gives us confidence.
- Knowing we are loved helps us get past our insecurities.
- Being loved gives us emotional strength. It helps us prevail in hard times.
- Being loved inspires and motivates us.
- Being loved makes us joyful, happy.
Thankfully love can come to us from many different sources: from parents, siblings, mates, children, friends. So that even if we’re missing love in one area, we can find it in another. It also comes in many different forms. In his book on love languages, Gary Chapman lists the five love languages as:
- Gifts
- Quality time
- Words of affirmation
- Acts of service
- Physical touch
You can probably quickly identify which one of these five languages speaks love to you, or maybe you’re thinking you need all five! There’s no question that we need love and lots of it throughout all our lives, in all stages of our lives, from lots of people in our lives.
That’s the way God created us. The Bible tells us that God is love; love is his character, his being, his personality. Love is the essence of the Triune God—Father, Son and Spirit. They are love and they love each other. So, since we are created in God’s image, it shouldn’t be surprising to discover that we are love-hungry creatures. And the God who is love, the only true God, loves us. That’s the great message of the Christian faith: We are all loved by God:
John 3:16: For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.
1 John 4:10: This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.
We’ve sung it since we were children: “Jesus loves me, this I know, for the Bible tells me so.” We sing it and yet how well do we know it? Are you living in the freedom of this wonderful truth? It’s sad that far too many of us have sung the song, “Jesus loves me, this I know,” but never lived in the joy of that truth. I mean, when we really get it—that we’re the one Jesus loves—that has to have life-changing effects for us. That truth should dig us right out of self-pity and give us the comfort and joy and completeness that we so need. It should supply for us all those love-needs we have, because if Jesus loves us, and we know it—we really know it—then it just fills up all those missing pieces that so often have caused us to do lots of crazy and harmful things as we looked for love in the wrong places.
So, what’s keeping us from really enjoying and living in the truth that Jesus loves us? Well, one reason could be that God’s love seems impersonal to us. I mean, if God loves everybody, what’s so special about the fact that God loves me? After all, God loves everybody.
Love is transforming in our lives when we know that the one who loves us is worthy, and we believe that love is directed to us individually.
For example, I am very secure that my mother and father loved me. I was so blessed to be raised in a home where that love was rock-solid and never once did I ever doubt for a minute that my parents loved me. But if I told you that I know they loved me because they loved everybody, that would not describe their love for me. They loved me because I was their daughter; I had a special relationship with them because I was born into their family. They loved other people, true, but they loved me special.
So, when we say that Jesus loves us and God loves us, we have to understand that while it’s true that God loves everybody, he loves us individually and uniquely. We’re not just part of some cosmic impersonal love blanket that God spreads over all his creation. No, we are known by God and loved by him personally.
Obviously, if we were talking about earthly love, we would definitely question any one person’s ability or sincerity to say they loved everyone. That would hold very little meaning for us. For example, if the President of the United States were to declare that he loved all Americans, we might think that was nice and appreciate the sentiment. But it would have no real impact in our lives because we don’t know the President personally and he doesn’t know us either, so that kind of blanket love would have little if any meaning for us.
So, it’s not enough for us to know that God loves the world; we have to know that God loves us individually, distinctively, uniquely. I want you to know that God is love, and he is so totally all about love, that he loves you with a portion of his love that is meant for you alone. His love is so big, so deep, so beyond our earthly understanding of love, that he can give you all the love you need and it’s just for you. Yet there’s plenty more where that came from.
God’s love is personal. He knows your name. He knows you better than you know yourself. He never loses track of you. He never forgets about you. He never gives up on you.
Isaiah 49:15-16 (MSG) Can a mother forget the infant at her breast, walk away from the baby she bore? But even if mothers forget, I’d never forget you—never. Look, I’ve written your names on the backs of my hands.
There’s no other love like God’s love, and you can take it to the bank. He never leaves you or forsakes you and nothing can separate you from his love.
I mentioned at the beginning that my theme, you are the one Jesus loves, comes from the Gospel of John. That’s because five times in his Gospel, the Apostle John refers to himself as the disciple “whom Jesus loved.” For example, in John 20:2 he tells about what happened on resurrection morning:
So she came running to Simon Peter and the other disciple, the one Jesus loved, and said, “They have taken the Lord out of the tomb, and we don’t know where they have put him!”
If you didn’t know better, you might think that John had an ego problem. Did he think Jesus loved only him and not the other disciples? Of course not. John knew for certain that Jesus loved them all. Note what he said about Martha, Mary and Lazarus:
John 11:5: Now Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus.
And when Jesus wept at the tomb where Lazarus was temporarily buried, the Jews said, “See how he loved him!” (John 11:36).
And after all, he wrote John 3:16 – God so loved the world. John knew full well that the love of God was the same for everyone. But he still referred to himself five times in writing that he was the apostle Jesus loved. Why? None of the other Gospel writers use that terminology about themselves. Why does John call himself “the one Jesus loved”?
Because his identity was found in the knowledge that Jesus loved him—individually, distinctively. That was how John saw himself—his grounded identity: I am the one Jesus loves. That was who he said he was: I am the one Jesus loves. That was his passport, his calling card, his access to the Father: I am the one Jesus loves.
John had this incredible freedom to say I am the one Jesus loves. He was not embarrassed or shy about saying it. He was so secure in the knowledge that Jesus loved him that this was the driving force of his life; this was the anchor that kept him steadfast and strong; this was the identity that gave him security and hope. He was the one Jesus loved.
It’s a mystery to us how God can know each of us and love each of us uniquely. No person could ever make such a claim. But it is truth—and it is truth that can set us free, as we find our identity as the one Jesus loves.
Here’s my challenge for you. Every morning when you first wake up, let your first thought and your first words be this: I am the one Jesus loves. Look in the mirror as you first get up and tell yourself this truth: I am the one Jesus loves. Start your day with this thought, instead of starting your day with some kind of negative thought. Then throughout your day, whether things are going good or things are tough, repeat it to yourself at least ten times each day: I am the one Jesus loves.
Live in this truth like you’ve never done before. Drive out wrong thoughts with this thought: I am the one Jesus loves. If someone upsets you or disrespects you or overlooks you, don’t dwell on those things. Instead just keep repeating, I am the one Jesus loves. I promise you, it will make a huge difference, because it is truth and it is truth that will set you free.
We are the Building of God, a temple for the Holy Spirit; we are the Body of Christ, functioning with unique gifts and abilities; and we are the betrothed Bride of Christ, loved by him intimately and personally. Think what it means to be a bride looking forward to a wedding.
- It means excitement. Every betrothed bride I’ve ever met was excited. Her wedding is on her mind constantly. She counts the days and hours.
As the Bride of Christ, should we not, too, be excited about being betrothed to Jesus? I know we’re in this world and it has more than its share of troubles for all of us. But think about what the future holds for us. A wedding! Remember who you are—the betrothed Bride of Christ.
- It means preparation. No one ever had a wedding without lots of preparation. It may be tiring at times, but it is a work of love.
We’re in that preparation stage now, as the betrothed Bride of Christ. You remember the story of Rebekah, being taken back on that long journey to meet her beloved bridegroom, Isaac, whom she had never seen. We’re on that journey now, waiting for the day when we’ll see our bridegroom, Jesus Christ.
I’m sure for Rebekah it wasn’t always a pleasant trip. I’m sure she wondered sometimes if they’d ever get there. I’m sure at times she felt discouraged and maybe even fearful. But she had said “I will” be married to Isaac, and she endured the long journey.
But when she saw him, that long trip was forgotten. And so it will be with us. As the song so perfectly puts it, “It will be worth it all when we see Jesus.”
- It means receiving. Betrothed brides get lots of gifts.
Just as the servant took costly gifts to Rebekah, so our beloved has given us incredibly costly and beautiful gifts. His love, his grace, his peace which passes all understanding. He promises he will never leave us or forsake us, and nothing can separate us from his love. No other bridegroom can make that promise.
I hope you’ll remember who you are as you go to your everyday worlds. People around you may not recognize that you’re wearing wedding garments, but don’t let this world rob you of the joy of being a betrothed bride. Isaiah 62:5 says, “As a bridegroom rejoices over his bride, so will your God rejoice over you.”
As a believer, what is my identity? The Bible says that we are the Building of God, the Body of Christ, and the Bride of Christ.
In Genesis 24 we see a beautiful love story which is a marvelous type of God’s love for us, his bride. Abraham was getting old and he wanted to find a wife for his beloved son, Isaac. So, he sent his chief servant to his own country to find a wife for Isaac.
The servant took with him all kinds of good things from his master for the bride when he found her. He prayed for God to show him who that bride should be, and Rebekah came to the well where the servant was resting, offered to water his camels, and he knew she was God’s chosen bride for Isaac.
He gave her jewels of gold and silver and articles of clothing–costly gifts. And when asked if she would return to marry Isaac, she answered simply, “I will go.”
I encourage you to read the entire story in Genesis 24 and see the beautiful type of God’s love for us. He sends the Holy Spirit to woo us, he offers us great treasures, and he asks us to be his betrothed bride. If and when we say “I will,” we are betrothed.
And just as Rebekah was betrothed to one she had not yet seen, so are we. Peter wrote “Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy…” (1 Peter 1:8).
Does that describe the way you feel? Are you filled with glorious joy at knowing you are betrothed to one you have not yet seen? If not, it might be because you either haven’t understood your relationship to Jesus as his betrothed bride, or you haven’t focused your mind on it.
I hope that you’ll be very conscious that you are the bride-to-be. If you carry that knowledge with you, you’re going to see yourself differently, you’ll see others differently, and your circumstances won’t have such control over you. There’s a great wedding to anticipate, and like all brides, we should be focused on that event.
Who am I? As believers we must know who we are as Christ-followers. Our identity needs to be firmly grounded in what the Bible tells us about how God sees us when we belong to him. Not for the purpose of self-focus, but in order to be equipped to worship and serve our Lord effectively.
When you become a believer and follower of Jesus Christ, we have seen already that you become the Building of God; a residence for the Holy Spirit, making your body his temple. Then we saw that all believers are part of the Body of Christ, and a body has functional parts that work together and each part is necessary.
- And then we are called the BRIDE of Christ.
“One of the seven angels . . .came and said to me, ‘Come, I will show you the bride, the wife of the Lamb’” (Revelation 21:9).
“Let us rejoice and be glad and give him glory! For the wedding of the Lamb has come and his bride has made herself ready’” (Revelation 19:7).
In Ephesians 5 Paul talks about the marriage relationship, how a husband should treat his wife, even as his own body, and how the two of them become one flesh. Then he adds “This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church” (Ephesians 5:32).
It’s good to know that we are the BUILDING of God and the BODY of Christ, but that wasn’t enough. God wanted us to know how much he loves us, how dear we are to him, how much he treasures us. And so, he has made us the betrothed BRIDE of Jesus Christ.
This is who we are in Jesus—because of Jesus. We are his bride-to-be. I’m certain God used this analogy because he wanted us to know how much he loves us, how tender and close is our relationship to him.
Dear friends, can we not rejoice in who we are? Isn’t that identity more important than any earthly classifications or identifications? Remember as you go out into your world, if you know Jesus, you are the beloved betrothed Bride of Christ. Rejoice!
Who we are in Christ is essential so that we will have an identity grounded in God’s truth. Without a good knowledge of your standing and relationship to God through Jesus, you’ll have problems with how you think about yourself. Knowing your identity as a believer is extremely important.
We are referred to as a BUILDING of God, providing housing for God’s Holy Spirit. Get a vision of yourself as a building, providing a permanent dwelling place for the Spirit of Christ who lives in your building. If you’ll do that, it will have an impact on how you see yourself and understand who you are.
- We are also referred to as the BODY of Christ.
“Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it” (1 Corinthians 12:27).
That 12th chapter of 1 Corinthians goes into much detail about how we are each members of the body, and the body is meant to work together in unity. Each part of the body needs the other part, and no part is more important than another. Christ is the head, and we are the body.
Each part of our bodies has a special and critical part to play in how we function. So, when you realize that you are part of the body of Christ, then you begin to understand how you are to function within the body; how important your gifts are. This gives you the assurance that God created you for a specific purpose in the body and you better understand your unique gifting.
Each person brings their unique function to the body of believers, and understanding that, you can be content with who you are. You understand the part you play and you don’t have to envy other people or wish you were like somebody else.
If you don’t understand this relationship you have as part of the body, then you’re missing out on an essential element of your identity in Christ. Carry this with you: If you have been born again through faith in Jesus Christ, then you are an essential and definite part of the BODY of Christ; you’re special; you’re unique. Make sure you’re functioning well in your specialty.
“Who am I?” This is a question that has been asked and answered a hundred different ways. But as Christians we need to know who we are in Christ. What is our identity as born-from-above believers? I don’t think too many of us really grasp the smallest inkling of who we are in Christ. Maybe it hasn’t been taught as it should be or somehow, we misunderstand what it means. The facts are, we need to have that identity grounded in our hearts and minds.
The Bible uses different analogies and types to teach us about who we are in Christ. I want to briefly tell you about three, all beginning with B:
- We are called the BUILDING of God
“For we are co-workers in God’s service; you are God’s field, God’s building” (1 Corinthians 3:9).
A building’s purpose is to provide housing, and our bodies are referred to as the temple of the Holy Spirit. Jesus said that he would abide in us (John 15:4). John wrote “This is how we know that we live in him and he in us: He has given us of his Spirit” (1 John 4:13).
When you realize that your body houses the Holy Spirit of the Living God, you know that you have power; you know that you’re never alone; you know that your life must be kept pure and clean because the blessed Holy Spirit is constantly abiding in you.
I used to do lots of business training, primarily teaching customer service and communications skills. In reality, it was teaching people to treat others the way they would like to be treated. It’s the biblical principle we call “The Golden Rule,” and it’s the best policy any company could have to establish good customer service.
But I often felt a little guilty teaching people who were in many cases non-believers to perform on their job with caring and compassion for others without being able to tell them where the power to do that comes from. I would not have that kind of heart for others if it weren’t for the Holy Spirit who dwells within me. Because I am the BUILDING of God, I have power to do and be what would be impossible otherwise. And the same is true for you, of course, if you are a Christ-follower.
Remember, as you go out into your work world, that you are a building of God—a house for God’s Spirit to abide in. It will make a difference in how you feel about yourself and how you respond to your circumstances.
Are you feeling the effects of the COVID pandemic and the isolation impact it has had? Mary Lowman and Lisa Bishop talk through the importance and value of community.
Below you will find some bullet points and relevant Scripture that are found in this conversation.
__________
Social isolation is a term being used these days to describe a lack of social connections. And there’s no doubt that the pandemic escalated this isolation, plus our electronic gadgets have begun to replace person-to-person communication. But that is not enough.
The potential effects of social isolation include:
- Loneliness
- Depression
- Poor sleep quality
- Impaired immunity
- Accelerated cognitive decline
- Poor cardiovascular function
- Impaired executive function
- Increased risk of premature death
And signs and symptoms of social isolation can involve:
- An inability to communicate with others and connect on a deeper level.
- Not having any close or best friends.
- Feelings of isolation, no matter where you are and who you are around.
- Negative feelings of self-doubt and self-worth.
- Feeling unseen or unheard when you reach out to others (they don’t reciprocate your efforts).
- Feeling exhausted or burnt out when trying to engage socially.
The COVID-19 pandemic introduced many people around the world to social isolation and the effects it can have as billions of people were locked down at home.
Relevant Passages:
1 Corinthians 12:27: Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it.
Philemon verse 7: Paul writes: Your love has given me great joy and encouragement, because you, brother, have refreshed the hearts of the Lord’s people.
Philippians 2:25: But I think it is necessary to send back to you Epaphroditus, my brother, co-worker and fellow soldier, who is also your messenger, whom you sent to take care of my needs.
1 Thessalonians 5:11: Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.
Hebrews 10:24-25: And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.
Romans 14:19:Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification.
Proverbs 27:17: As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.
Colossians 3:16: Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts.
Romans 15:1: We who are strong ought to bear with the failings of the weak and not to please ourselves.
Hebrews 3:13: But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called “Today,” so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness.
Ecclesiastes 4:9: Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor.
Romans 1:11-12: I long to see you so that I may impart to you some spiritual gift to make you strong—that is, that you and I may be mutually encouraged by each other’s faith.
How can you build relationships with your co-workers so that you have an opportunity to share God’s love with them, tell them of your faith journey, and be a witness for Jesus on the job?
Here are the last two ways that we can share God’s love on the job.
- Be ready to apologize when you need to.
My friend, Janet, says that the major difference between her and her co-workers who are not yet believers is that she apologizes more often! Well, being humble enough to apologize when you’re wrong is definitely a God-thing, and it really does go a long way to breaking down barriers and solving problems.
- Build relationships with your co-workers by using lunchtime as an opportunity to talk.
It is not appropriate to use any significant amount of company time for personal conversations. But there is your lunch hour, and you can use that time for building relationships.
Let me tell you about my friend, Cynthia. Many years ago, she worked in a difficult environment, where she was not fully accepted as a co-equal, because she is African-American. She sensed this attitude, particularly on the part of one co-worker, who actually told her they could never be friends because of their ethic differences. But Cynthia determined by God’s grace to overcome those differences. So, she began what she called Project Love, and each week she invited one of her co-workers to have lunch with her. She even designed special invitations for them, and so one by one, she began Project Love. That began to break down those barriers as her co-workers got to know her and vice-versa. And the woman who declared they could never be friends—well, as it turns out, she has become a close friend and confidant of Cynthia’s, and even though they no longer work together, they stay in touch, and Cynthia gets birthday cards and greetings from her regularly.
Love works, my friends. Love will overcome, and if there are some difficult relationships where you work now, why don’t you ask God for your own Project Love idea, instead of giving up on those relationships.
Have you shared God’s love on the job lately? Sometimes it seems like the workplace is the last place we can talk about God or share our faith. Paul wrote to the Corinthian Christians that they were “a letter from Christ. . . written not with ink but with the Spirit of the living God, not on tablets of stone but on tablets of human hearts” (2 Corinthians 3:3). You can be the word of the living God, a letter of love from Jesus to the people you work with, when you take time to let God’s love shine through you. I’ve given you six ideas on how to do that already. Here are numbers 7 and 8:
- Smile
Are you aware that your body language is louder than the words you speak? It’s true, and so we can send messages of love without saying a word. Smiling is surely one of the easiest and most effective ways to do that. All of us can smile; doesn’t cost a thing; doesn’t take any time. You just have to remember to do it.
Proverbs reminds us that, “A cheerful look brings joy to the heart. . .” (Proverbs 15:30). So, why don’t we work harder at smiling more? I’m not advocating phony, insincere smiles, but many of us just have to work at smiling more. We feel smiles on the inside, but don’t show them on our faces. That’s my problem, I know, so I really try to remember to smile more. Some of you were born with smiles on your face, so it comes easy for you. But some of us have to remember to smile, because it brings joy to the heart, and it shares a little of God’s love with others.
- Do the “dirty work” sometimes, even if it’s not your job.
There are always those things that need to be done in a workplace environment that nobody really wants to do. They aren’t in anyone’s job description. Things like cleaning the kitchen or making the coffee; cleaning up after a meeting or tidying up the general work area. In smaller workplaces, it might be things like taking out the trash or taking the mail to the post office.
If you just do those things occasionally, without being asked and without grumbling, it would be a good way to show a loving, caring attitude toward the people you work with and for.
Too often we think that the only way we can witness for Jesus is through the words we say—quoting Scripture or giving our testimony or explaining the four spiritual laws. And frankly, there are not many opportunities in any given day to do that. But there are countless ways to show the love of God through our actions and our attitudes. But we have to make a decision to be intentional about it.
I’m offering ten suggestions for sharing God’s love where you work. Here are suggestions five and six:
- Help others with their workload when you can.
Maybe you have an assistant who helps you, and you know she or he is just overloaded with work at the moment. If you said, “Hey, I can stay an extra hour tonight and help get that done,” don’t you think that could really be an effective way to communicate God’s love? Or maybe you know that a co-worker is struggling with a certain assignment, doesn’t know how to get started. If you’ve got some experience or expertise that would help them, just stop what you’re doing and help them out.
Obviously, you have your own work to do, which cannot be neglected, but for sure there are times when stopping to help someone else is just the right, thoughtful thing to do.
- Look for opportunities to congratulate and compliment people any time you can.
Think about it: aren’t there times in the day when you think something nice about someone but you don’t express it? I try to make myself verbalize the compliments I think. For example, if I like the outfit someone is wearing, and think, “That looks nice on her,” then why not say it to her. If I think, “He did a great job on that,” why not say it. I think we would be more encouraging to others if we simply determined to verbalize the compliments we think.
Also, look for ways to congratulate people on any accomplishment possible. “You lost five pounds? Wow, good job.” “I noticed you stayed late last night and finished that job. Thanks.” “Your daughter made a 3.8 on her grades this semester? Terrific!”
There are so many little things we can do in any given day to show love and concern for others, to demonstrate that we are thinking about someone beside ourselves. We live in a world that is pretty self-centered, but as servants of Jesus Christ, we are called to “look not only to your own interest, but also to the interests of others,” as we read in Philippians 2:4.
These things we can do because we have the motivation of God’s Spirit within us, and the power he imparts to us, and believe me, God’s love will be felt as we intentionally seeks ways to share God’s love on our jobs.
Have you ever had an opportunity to preach the gospel where you work? If you are in a secular workplace, I seriously doubt it! So, then, how can a Christian effectively share God’s love where they work? I’m sharing ten suggestions that all of us can do as a way to become the Bible that people read, the living Word of God on our jobs. Here are suggestions three and four:
- Go through your schedule for each day and pray for the people you know you will interact with.
I know that many of you are facing added stress and pressure on your jobs these days. Seems like there’s more workload for fewer people, and I hear from many of you that you’re expected to do more than you can get done in a day’s time. This kind of environment can easily cause interpersonal problems with co-workers.
So, pray in advance for the people you will interact with. Remember, no one is in your life by accident, so even that difficult co-worker can be changed by God’s love. Ask God to give you wisdom in how best to deal with the difficult people on your job. Ask him to help you see them the way he sees them, and to give you a loving attitude toward them. Remember, you don’t have to like someone to show them God’s love.
You could easily do this as you commute to work. Make it a daily practice to pray through your day before it starts, and you will discover that God supplies strength and ideas and help to get you through the day with a loving and kind attitude toward the people you encounter.
- Plan acts of kindness.
In 2 Timothy 2:24 we read, “And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful.” If you are a servant of Jesus Christ, your calling is to be kind to everyone—everyone! I think we have to remember to be kind, don’t you? I mean, you can just get so busy, trying to do your job and keep all your balls in the air, that you forget to do the kind things that matter to people. Here are two easy suggestions:
Send cards at appropriate times. You could find out the birth dates of your co-workers, put them on your calendar, and then simply send a birthday card, even an email card would be fine.
Celebrate significant events in the lives of co-workers—like promotions, or graduations, or marriages and anniversaries. It doesn’t take much effort to bring in some goodies and have a small celebration, and it truly is meaningful. But you have to plan those acts of kindness and be intentional about them.
If you go to a secular workplace every day, you may wonder what in the world you can do in that kind of environment to share your faith in Jesus Christ, to really have an impact for the gospel. Well, I’m going to give you ten suggestions for sharing God’s love where you work.
- Set aside a certain time each day or week to pray for your workplace.
I have discovered that many Christians don’t really pray for their workplace. I think sometimes we separate our “secular jobs” from our spiritual life, as though the two have nothing in common. But for a Christian, everything should be sacred. We should all see ourselves in “full time Christian work,” and so our workplaces are, in effect, our mission field.
What is the best way to pray for your workplace? Well, first, pray for those in authority, for your relationship with them, for wisdom as they make decisions. Then pray for the success of the business, that God will bless the efforts of those working there. Pray for the morale of the workers, that there will be good working relationships, a good team atmosphere, conducive to good work. And then pray for whatever distressing or troubling situations you are experiencing. For example, if the company is experiencing a difficult economic situation, pray for new business, for creative marketing ideas and so forth.
I would encourage you to set aside a specific time to pray for your workplace, maybe on Mondays, so that you have this programmed into your schedule and you don’t overlook it.
- Take prayer walks through your company/organization/building.
Now, this is a clandestine kind of prayer, not one you advertise or talk about. But it’s easy to do. Just take a lunch hour, say once a week, and walk through your company, up and down the various hallways and floors, inconspicuously, and quietly pray for each person and department as you walk by their office or place of work. Or if it’s a small workplace, you might walk around the building. Perhaps you might do this before work one day, when not too many people are around. This is a really effective way to remember to pray for the people in your company or department or division.
So, here are two things any of us can and should do to bring God’s love to our workplace. I truly believe you will be amazed to see how prayer can change things where you work.
This title about dancing in the rain caught my attention when I read this: “Life’s not about waiting for the storm to pass… it’s about learning to dance in the rain.” There’s a lot of truth in that statement.
You know, none of us is exempt from storms; and in fact, God sends and allows storms in our lives to be used for good. In Acts 27 we read about a storm that came upon Paul as he was sailing to Rome. Paul was a prisoner; he had no authority or freedom. But there he was. And don’t miss this: He was in that storm because God was sending him where God wanted him to be—to Rome. This storm did not catch God by surprise. God didn’t look down from heaven and say, “Oh, my goodness, what is happening to Paul? How in the world did he get himself in such a mess?”
No, Paul was in that storm because he was doing God’s will. He was a prisoner because he was preaching the gospel. You remember after Jesus had fed the five thousand, he told the disciples to get into the boat and go on ahead of him to the other side of the Sea of Galilee. They did what Jesus told them to do and guess what happened: They found themselves in the midst of a storm. Another time they followed him onto a boat, and he went to sleep, but without warning a furious storm came up on the lake. A storm on the lake and Jesus was in the boat!
In all of these situations, Paul and the disciples were doing exactly what Jesus told them to do, and then they found themselves in the midst of terrible storms. If anyone tries to tell you that a Christian is exempt from storms, they are not telling you the truth! Nothing in Scripture would validate that belief. In fact, just the opposite. Peter writes:
Dear friends, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal that has come on you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice inasmuch as you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed (1 Peter 4:12-13).
Your storm has not taken God by surprise. But what does it mean to “dance in the rain”? The bottom line is, it means to have a grateful and thankful heart, no matter what your circumstances. The Bible says to “give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus” (1 Thessalonians 5:18). And again, it tells us to “always give thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ” (Ephesians 5:20). We are to give thanks in our storms and for our storms. That is what it means to dance in the rain.
You may be thinking, “Do you really expect me to thank God for being laid off, or getting a bad report from my doctor, or losing someone close to me, or watching my grown child stray far from God?” Well, I recognize that seems difficult if not impossible, but those are not my instructions or my idea. It is the inspired Word of God to us—to give thanks in and for everything.
I think of a dear friend who lost his eyesight in mid-life. He went through some tough days when he learned he would eventually go blind, but he will tell you now that it is one of the best things that ever happened to him. Not that he likes being blind, but he has become such an amazing man of God because that blindness has driven him to love and trust God more.
Learning to give thanks in and for everything just comes down to simple obedience—doing what God says to do even though you don’t want to, even when your heart is not in it. Maybe that’s what it means to give a “sacrifice of praise,” to thank and praise God when it just doesn’t make sense! I know God will honor that obedience.
James 1:2-4 says, “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”
That storm you’re going through, whether from God or simply used by God, is for a purpose—to supply something lacking in your life.
- Is faith lacking in your life? A storm will grow your faith faster than anything else.
- Is joy lacking in your life? The joy of the Lord becomes your strength in the midst of a storm.
- Is humility lacking in your life? A storm will blow away that pride that is in your heart, put you on your knees and teach you true humility.
- Could it be that maturity is lacking? A storm will grow you up fast, and you’ll lose those childish ways, that immature attitude which has held you in its grips far too long.
- What is lacking in your life? Courage? A storm will give you a backbone and untie your tongue so that you are not ashamed of the gospel.
All things still work together for good for those who love the Lord, so that’s why we can dance in the rain!
You know, you can go through a storm and never realize God’s purpose for you in that storm. You can choose to worry, to complain, to be bitter, to manipulate and run and talk to everybody else about it, and totally miss the good God has for you in the storm.
If it’s your desire to really fly above your storms, to dance in the rain instead of responding in fear and dismay, step one in this rain dance is to face your fears. Storms tend to grip our hearts with fear. Every time we had a thunderstorm, my little dog would become very fearful. He would run to me, want to get close to me, and look for a hiding place. It makes me reflect on how I react to the storms of life. Fear causes me to panic, to run, to try to get away.
I was talking with a young career woman about the challenges she is facing on her job, and she said that she has been so intimidated and made so fearful by her co-workers that she just wants to get out of there. My advice was that before she runs away from that fearful situation, she needs to have victory over the fear. Fear comes from the evil one, and if she decides to leave that job, it should be in victory, not in defeat.
As long as your heart is filled with fear, you won’t be able to dance in the rain. Fear is like wearing lead shoes; it keeps you bound and it’s hard to put one foot in front of the other, much less dance! Remember that the good things are on the other side of fear.
How do you get rid of fear? You attack it with the word of God. Here are some good weapons to throw at your fear:
Psalm 23:4: Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me.
Psalm 27:3: Though an army besiege me, my heart will not fear; though war break out against me, even then will I be confident.
Romans 8:15: The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.”
These are just a few of the hundreds of passages that teach us not to fear. If you want to dance in the rain, then face that fear, and start literally quoting Scripture against it. It will set you free.
Here is another important step in learning to do this rain dance, and that is to look for someone to encourage and help. Get outside of yourself; ask God to impress on your mind someone you should personally help. Then become very intentional about helping them, whatever that means. It could mean:
- Give them some money.
- Give them some time.
- Help them get a job done that needs to be done.
- Send words of encouragement.
- Provide a meal.
Remember, you reap what you sow, so sow what you need. A farmer who wants to eat or sell corn doesn’t sow beans. He sows corn.
- If you need encouragement, sow it.
- If you need money, sow it.
- If you need help in finding a job, sow it.
A friend of mine has lung cancer and they told her she would die in six months. Well, she’s into year four now, and though weak, she is still with us. She is amazingly joyful and in good spirits, but she recently told me she’s tired of being sick and wishes to be with Jesus. That’s understandable, but I reminded her that God has a purpose for her even in these really horrendous circumstances. She said, “Well, I guess you’re right. So many people have told me how I have encouraged them to deal with their sicknesses—and none of them is as serious as mine.” “There,” I told her, “God is using you even though the circumstances are pretty terrible. Who knows how many people you have encouraged and inspired, including me.”
You may be thinking that you can’t help others until your storm is over, but believe me, you can! In fact, one of the purposes for your storm is to give you understanding and sympathy for others in a storm.
Isaiah 58:6 – 9: Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke? Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter—when you see the naked, to cloth him, and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood? Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the Lord will be your rear guard. Then you will call, and the Lord will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.
Your help comes when you start caring and helping others.
I read this poem recently, entitled “Weather Report.” It talks about dancing in the rain.
Any day I am vertical is a good day, that’s what I say. And I give thanks for my health.
If you ask me, “How are you?”, I’ll answer. “I’m great” because in saying so, I make it so. And I give thanks I can choose my attitude.
When Life gives me dark clouds and rain, I appreciate the moisture that brings a soft curl to my hair.
When Life gives me sunshine, I gratefully turn my face up to feel its warmth on my cheeks.
When Life brings snow, I dash outside to catch the first flakes on my tongue, relishing the icy miracle that is a snowflake.
Life’s events and experiences are like the weather—they come and go, no matter what my preference.
So. . . I might as well decide to enjoy them. For indeed there IS a time for every purpose under Heaven.
Each season brings its own unique blessings. And I give thanks.
You may be facing tough times these days, but, my friend, if you belong to Jesus, you have what it takes to dance in the rain, to truly be joyful in the Lord always.
The Psalmist wrote: “You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my heart may sing your praises and not be silent. Lord my God, I will praise you forever” (Psalm 30:11-12).
I hope you’ll truly determine, by God’s grace, not to let fear or worry or despair overtake you. Instead to say with Job:
But he knows the way that I take; when he has tested me, I will come forth as gold (Job 23:10).
So, as you face your storm today—or whenever it comes along—ask God to show you how to dance in the rain. To rejoice even in the midst of the storm. It is the joy of the Lord that is our strength, and if you will choose to dance in your storm, you will have the strength you need to endure it.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
The Apostle Paul penned in Philippians this about contentment: “I can do all things through him who gives me strength” (Philippians 4:13).
To achieve contentment Paul knew he needed the strength of Christ. To achieve contentment, you and I need the strength of Christ. But our natural inclination is often not to make Jesus our go to. In our humanness we forget we have God’s strength and the power of his Holy Spirit to help us. We neglect to delight ourselves in the Lord.
The concept of delighting in God is closely connected with intimacy with God. A desire for more of his presence. A depth of relationship where we want to know Jesus more, experience him more, worship him more, converse with him more, and find growing freedom in him. This requires making time to be with God. Daily being in his Word, in prayer and simply being still and delighting in his presence. This also reminds me of John 15:5,
“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”
Remain in God. Abide in Jesus. And in every situation believe and remember that your secret to contentment is calling on Jesus who gives you the strength to be content and to be truly satisfied in him.
This side of heaven you will battle with discontentment. It will never go away, and you will never be fully satisfied until you are in heaven with Jesus. But it is possible and a necessity that you pursue contentment in Jesus while on earth. There is great satisfaction to be found in Christ. God wants you to experience joy, gratitude and inner peace in the here and now. Just remember, it will take an earnest attempt on your part, and intention to delight yourself in him.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
What do you do when life is not going the way you planned? When you feel disappointed, uncertain, or unsettled?
We are taking a deep dive into contentment and how you can have more of it in your life, no matter your circumstances. If I have learned anything about contentment, cultivating it takes effort and it is something that you learn by intentionally pursuing it, consistently over time. It’s an inward state of satisfaction that comes from trusting God with your life even when circumstances look dim.
If I am not careful, I can quickly find myself in a state of discontentment when my life is not going the way I envisioned. When a prayer I feel like I have prayed for years still goes unanswered. When I am uncertain, fearful and anxious about what the future holds, my emotions can be easily swayed to dissatisfaction and can drive me to seek fulfillment in ways that are not healthy or helpful.
Where are you finding it difficult to be content? Think about it. What area of your life has not gone the way that you dreamed? When you come face to face with life’s disappointments, detours, or delays, where or what do you turn to?
We can be tempted to try and numb ourselves and dull the discontent. You may turn to food, busyness, binging on Netflix. Maybe you turn to sex, pornography, alcohol or marijuana and other drugs. In an effort to dismiss the ache of an unmet longing we turn to idols to give us comfort even though we know that our idols never satisfy. Yet in the long moments of our lack of contentment, our flesh, our compulsion leads us to chase after worthless things.
In Psalm 119:37, David knew his tendency to let his flesh rule in challenging circumstances. And when tempted and pressed in on every side, he cries out to the Lord, “Turn my eyes away from worthless things; preserve my life according to your word.” The Passion Translation says, “Help me turn my eyes away from illusions.”
Idols are illusions. The things you turn to in your impatience or frustration may give a sense of temporary relief but will ultimately wreck you.
When you are tempted to seek idols for comfort, turn. Turn your eyes away from the idol and towards God and ask him to help you. You need to override your desire to self-medicate and turn your eyes to Jesus, the author and perfecter of your faith.
Ditch your idols, make a habit of turning to God, and contentment will be produced in you.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Would you say you gravitate towards grumbling or gratitude?
We don’t have to read very far in the Bible to see numerous examples in the Old Testament where grumbling was rampant, and gratitude was severely lacking. The Israelites rarely seemed to be content and when they were it lasted a hot minute before they were back to their complaining ways. They give examples of what it looks like and sounds like to forget God’s faithfulness. To fail to remember all of the ways he has, is and will provide for your daily needs. All too often it’s easy to be tempted to measure your gratitude against the backdrop of what you want rather than trusting God sees the bigger picture and will never deny you of what you actually need.
In Exodus 16 we see the Israelites are in their sixth week of wandering in the wilderness after the Lord has just delivered them from over 400 years of slavery. As they enter the wilderness it also begins a cycle of crisis, grumbling, God’s provision, gratitude. Now let’s be honest, I don’t know if you or I would have acted much differently with our lack of gratitude but what I don’t want us to miss is that the wilderness is a training ground to mature in Christ, to grow in our ability to see God’s provision even in hard circumstances and to learn to trust him.
In the desert the whole community grumbled against Moses and Aaron. The Israelites said to them, “If only we had died by the Lord’s hand in Egypt! There we sat around pots of meat and ate all the food we wanted, but you have brought us out into this desert to starve this entire assembly to death” (Exodus 16:2-3).
After they complain, God responds by providing for their needs. They are grateful for a short time but quickly have gratitude amnesia and the cycle of grumbling begins again. It’s a recurring pattern not only for the Israelites, but for our spiritual lives as well.
When you are facing challenging circumstances, it can be easy to focus on what you do not have and to forget what there is to be grateful for. Here’s a challenge for you. Write a list of ten things you are grateful for. Nothing is too small. Thank God for them. Learn to be content as you practice turning your grumbling into gratitude.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Denying yourself is a gateway to a contented life.
The Apostle Paul says this, “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want” (Philippians 4:12).
When Paul uses the word “know” he means, “to know how, to be skilled in.” Paul had more than head knowledge of what contentment meant. He felt the pain and the reward of practicing contentment. As a reminder, Paul was writing this letter to the church while he was in prison and you can assume the circumstances were not pretty. Paul could not come and go as he pleased, order Chinese food and have it delivered through Grub Hub or get his favorite movies on demand. When Paul says he has learned contentment, in the middle of a prison cell, in the midst of lack and plenty, I think it had something to do with the discipline of denying himself. Not having what he wanted when he wanted it.
If you are so accustomed to having your way you will be hard pressed to maintain inward satisfaction when your circumstances are less than desirable. I feel entitled to a comfortable life sometimes. A life free of hardship, difficult coworkers, drained finances, and messy relationships. How about you? This is where Paul’s example of knowing contentment whether in need or in plenty is so important for you to embrace in your own life and this is where denying yourself comes in. Knowing what it feels like to be in want and be okay!
One way of denying yourself is through practicing the spiritual discipline of fasting. Typically, it is fasting from food for a day, or two, or three. Or, fasting from a meal on any given day. Denying ourselves of food, the source of comfort and pleasure can be the fastest way to experience self-denial. When that “hangry” state or those hunger pains kick in, we direct our attention to Jesus, the only one who satisfies and we begin to experience Paul’s teaching for ourselves.
“I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want” (Philippians 4:12b).
Our appetites for more are what lead to disgruntlement and dissatisfaction. Learn to discipline yourself with self-denial. Embrace your circumstances and trust God to provide in them.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Are you content with your job, your relationships, your living circumstances, your life?
I recently read an article in Psychology Today entitled, “The Secret to a Contented Life.” In a nutshell it said that contentment comes from unconditional self-acceptance. As a follower of Jesus, you and I know the secret is not to “love yourself more.” We share with the Apostle Paul in having the true secret to contentment and that’s why we’ll look at what I call the four D’s of living a contented life. But before we do, let’s remind ourselves of Paul’s profound words in Philippians:
…I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength (Philippians 4:11b-13).
When I studied this passage several years ago the word that stood out to me was, “learned.” Whenever you read Scripture, look for repeated words. That means the author is trying to get your attention and make a point. Here Paul uses the word “learned” two times. In the Greek it means, “to learn by use and practice, to be in the habit of, accustomed to.”
I think this is where a lot of us can get tripped up and discouraged. We want contentment just to come, when in fact it is hard work and something we often have to practice over and over again and fight for. Which seems counterintuitive, but we live in a world where we are bombarded with messages that this car, that job, that outfit, that spouse will make you happy. And while we ultimately know it’s not true, we can fall into the fleeting trap of believing contentment can be found “out there somewhere.” With some particular need or desire being met, when really it is a state of mind and a state of being satisfied in Christ. Contentment is not a quick fix, it’s learned. Where are you lacking contentment?
It is a bit of a paradox, I recognize, to be both contented and not contented. Maybe it’s helpful to say we should accept who we are but never settle for where we are. Have you discovered that when you are not happy with who you are, you inflict great suffering on yourself? It causes you to be envious of others, to resent the success of others, to fight to get ahead of others, to be dependent on the approval of others. All kinds of problems arise when you cannot accept who you are.
Have you come to that place yet, where you can truly say, “I like the way God has created me”? Oh, I hope so. It is not prideful to appreciate God’s handiwork in you. Rather it brings glory to God, just as when you appreciate a work of art you bring honor to the artist.
Today I want to point out three additional areas where we need to learn to accept but not settle.
Your Gifts and Talents
Have you accepted the way God has gifted you? The Bible clearly teaches us that each believer has been given definite and recognizable gifts or talents, which are resources to use in serving the Lord. First Corinthians 12 and Romans 12 are good chapters to study if you’re not familiar with these gifts.
Once you know how God has gifted you, then accept that role you’ve been given with great joy. The things God has gifted you to do are the things that make you the happiest and bring the most satisfaction. You’ll find great joy when you’re functioning the way God created you to.
For example, if you have the gift of encouragement, your greatest joy will be to write notes, help someone out, listen to a heartache—lots of things like that which an encourager does so well. It won’t be a chore or a duty because it’s your gift; it will be a delight.
If your gift is administration, you’ll love organizing and doing all the behind-the-scenes things that are so important. If your gift is mercy, you will naturally have a sympathetic heart toward hurting people and find yourself trying to help them.
Using your God-given gifts and talents will bring you satisfaction, and you will do those things with enthusiasm and excellence.
But here’s the other side of the coin: Never be satisfied with your gifts the way they are. Jesus told a parable about three people who were given talents to use. One had five talents, one two talents and one had only one. When the master returned and demanded an accounting as to how each one used his talents, he gave strong approval to the first two because they multiplied their talents. But to the man with only one, he gave a grave condemnation because he hid his talent and did not multiply it. You’ll find that parable in Matthew 25.
What Jesus taught us there is that when we use the gifts and talents he has given us, he will give us more. I’ve been amazed to see this in my own life. I’m telling you, years ago I could never have imagined being able to do some of the ministries and new ideas God has allowed me to be involved with. But God is true to his word, and when we start using the talent we have, God is faithful to give us more and increase our effectiveness.
So, accept the talents and gifts God has invested in you, and then set out to grow them as much as possible. You do that by using them any way you can. Jump in the water and get wet. Often I’m asked how I began my ministry, which is now heard on over 400 radio stations internationally and reaches out in many other ways. Well, it began in my home in Chicago over thirty-five years ago as a Bible study for five or six women. That Bible study lasted several years, and to this day is one of the sweetest, best memories I have.
From that I started a small ministry at my church and became involved in other ministries there, serving in various ways. And much to my amazement, the doors opened until now we have a much bigger outreach. But it all began where I was—in my home. And little by little God gave me opportunities to develop my gifts. God keeps his word, and he has promised that when we are faithful with the gifts and talents we have, he will give us more. Start where you are, with whatever you have to offer, and see where God can take it. You will be amazed.
Your Intelligence
Another thing about ourselves we need to be content with is our intelligence. There’s no doubt that God gave some people more brain power than others. Do you feel like you’ve been shortchanged in this department and you don’t understand why God didn’t make you real smart? Well, God needs some real smart brainy types, but he needs a lot of us ordinary types as well.
Some of you had to fight for everything you learned in school and good grades did not come easily. Others could cram for a test at the last minute and ace it. It may not seem fair, but God has reasons for these differences in IQ, and we need to accept who we are when it comes to intelligence. But don’t settle for where you are. Keep pushing the envelope to learn as much as possible.
Scientists tell us that we use only a miniscule portion of the potential in the human brain. And what I’ve discovered is that when I push myself mentally, my brain power seems to increase.
I have a friend who began her college career in her mid-life, while she was working full-time. She always felt like she didn’t have what it takes to complete college—she wasn’t smart enough—but she discovered that she could handle college level classes, she could do well in them, and she was so joyful about what she was learning. She didn’t settle for where she was, and by God’s grace, she improved her mind and gained knowledge that enabled her to minister more effectively.
You may not have the highest IQ around, but you’ve got far more brain power than you realize. Don’t settle for where you are intellectually; become a student and continually work at learning more—and you can improve your mind and knowledge whether in school or not. Good reading habits will make a huge difference. And for those of you with lots of brain power, remember that to whom much is given much will be required, so be sure you’re making very good use of all that mental capacity.
Your Circumstances
Let me mention one last thing where we need to be contented, and that is with our circumstances. Paul wrote: “I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances” (Philippians 4:11b). Have you learned that lesson yet? Just think about the freedom you and I would have if we could truly say with Paul: “I am content with my circumstances.”
I think of a friend whom I admire greatly. She worked for Moody Radio in Chicago for many years, and is a gracious, lovely, talented woman. Due to a work-related accident, her husband has been disabled most of their long-married life. When that happened, overnight her dreams of what her life would be like died, as she was forced to become a working woman and raise their children, while helping her disabled husband.
When I think of the years she did that, I marvel at her attitude. She never complained; she learned to be content in the midst of very difficult circumstances. And even when more family problems were poured on her head, she continued to trust God and accept what was coming her way.
Through all the years she never lost heart or gave up or ran away—all of which I would have been tempted to do. Instead, she contributed immensely on her job and improved herself and did the most anyone could do “under the circumstances,” as we say. She comes to my mind as a woman who has accepted the circumstances of her life, and yet they have not beaten her into the ground. She has grown and contributed and made a beautiful life for herself.
So often when our circumstances are out of sorts—we’ve got the wrong job or we live in the wrong place or we don’t have enough money or we don’t have good health or whatever—we are then tempted to waste our lives and squander our opportunities because of our adverse circumstances.
If that’s where you are today, I urge you to start praying daily that God will teach you to be content with your circumstances and help you accept what is coming your way right now. But at the same time, don’t settle for life in the doldrums just because the circumstances are rotten. You can live above them and find that those difficult circumstances of your life can lead to growth and service and joy right in the midst of the problems.
Accept but don’t settle; be contented and discontented. I hope you’ll remember that you can hold both in balance, because I believe it will help you. It will help you to be more content and appreciative of who you are, just the way God made you, and where your life is right now. But it will also remind you never to let yourself off the hook because “that’s the way you are,” but always strive to be all that you can be for the glory of Jesus Christ.
Do you know how to be a good complainer? I want to show you how to complain. For sure, life is full of things we don’t like, things that aren’t good, and sometimes we just need to complain. Well, here’s how to do it.
In Psalm 142:1-2, David said “I cry aloud to the Lord; I lift up my voice to the Lord for mercy. I pour out before him my complaint; before him I tell my trouble.”
King David had some genuine complaints, but he knew where to go with them. He poured them out before the Lord. Do you take your complaints to the Lord and actually verbalize them to him? You should, because he understands you, he cares about you, he’s always there to listen, and he has answers. Instead of complaining to everyone around you, why not tell the one person who invites you to bring all your cares and problems to him, because he cares for you?
I notice as David spelled out his complaint to God, he heard his own words, and that led him back into right thinking. He says in verse 5 and 7a, “I cry to you, O Lord; I say, ‘You are my refuge, my portion in the land of the living…Set me free from my prison that I may praise your name.”
I find that when I pour out my complaints to God, I start to gain perspective and I realize that they’re not as big as I thought they were. I also realize that I’m a captive to my own complaining spirit, and once I see that, then God can set me free from that prison of griping and complaining.
Philippians 2:14 says we are to do everything without complaining or arguing. But listen to the great benefits of practicing this biblical principle: “… so that you may become blameless and pure, “children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation.” Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky as you hold firmly to the word of life.” (Philippians 2:15-16a). We will shine like stars and show others Jesus as we learn to do everything without complaining.
What a great testimony Christians would have especially in the marketplace if we truly took our complaints to the Lord—to him only—and replaced our complaining spirits with his joy and peace.
How do we get rid of the bad habit of complaining? I’ve given you four effective ways to cure the contagious disease of complaining in your life and they’re not hard to do. You just have to remember to do them; pray about them; seek God’s help to remember not to complain, and then watch the transformation in your own life when you are no longer a complainer!
Let me give you one more really good cure for complaining:
- Learn to practice the 24-hour rule.
What is the 24-hour rule, you ask? It’s simple: When you’re starting to complain and you’re getting frustrated or impatient, ask yourself this one question: What difference will this make in 24 hours? And then, the rule is that if it doesn’t make a real difference in 24 hours, you are not allowed to complain about it.
I promise you, from my own life experience, that this will go a long way toward curing the complaining disease. A great majority of what you and I complain about today won’t matter at this same time tomorrow. When I began to practice this rule, I was a complainer. I was travelling a lot and I found much to complain about with late airplanes, poor customer service, bad hotels—and so I complained, both verbally and in my own mind. Of course, my complaining didn’t change anything, it just made me a miserable person. I suffered from this disease of complaining but I also passed it on to others, I’m sure, because complaining is a very contagious disease.
That’s when I got smart and began to practice this 24-hour rule—and I do so to this day. I talk to myself and make myself obey the 24-hour rule—if it doesn’t matter in 24 hours, don’t complain about it. I challenge you to try it. I think it will work for you too.
These five cures for complaining that I’ve given you are biblically based principles that will truly help you to become a more joyful, pleasant person, and you will be a better representative of Jesus Christ in every area of your life—and most especially where you work.
Can you think of someone you know who you would describe as a negative, complaining person? I’m guessing you probably can, but here’s the harder question: Would people who know you put you in that category of a habitual complainer?
Well, even if you’re not totally consumed with complaining, you may have allowed a complaining spirit to creep into your mind and heart. I’m talking about how to cure the contagious disease called complaining.
I gave you two important cures: Make thanksgiving a part of your everyday routine and adjust your expectations. I want to add a couple more suggestions:
- Stop trying to control the uncontrollable.
Control freaks like me get very focused on fixing things and setting things straight. But one of the best gifts you can give yourself is to let go of that drive to control the uncontrollable. When you think about it, there’s not a whole bunch of things in life you can control except yourself, is there? But my guess is that a lot of your complaining is probably about the uncontrollable things and people in your life. What a futile exercise that is! Here’s a good thought to keep in mind: If you will control the controllable—namely you—you will be able to cope with the uncontrollable. And you’ll stop complaining about all those things beyond your control. It will make a difference.
- Let go of yesterday and tomorrow.
Much of the complaining you hear every day is about what happened yesterday or what might happen tomorrow. Jesus told us that we are not to worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. He reminded us that each day has enough trouble of its own (Matthew 6:34). And yesterday is past history; you can never change it, so complaining about either yesterday or tomorrow is a pointless exercise. Live in today; focus on making today as good as you can, so you won’t have anything to complain about it tomorrow!
Don’t you think that we often allow ourselves to get into the complaining pit without even realizing it, and before we know it, we’ve caught that destructive disease. But there is a cure and if you and I will just change a few of our bad habits, and ask God to help us, we can be set free from complaining.
Would you like to stop complaining? I have a message of great hope for you. You can be set free from the curse of complaining; you don’t have to continue to suffer from this very contagious disease. In fact, if you are a Christ-follower, you have been given a clear directive to get rid of complaining in your life.
Philippians 2:14 puts it very simply: “Do everything without grumbling or arguing.”
I pointed out that complaining can be addictive, and it can cause you real mental and physical problems. There is no doubt that you would be much better off if you would get rid of complaining, and because it is a contagious disease, everyone around you would be better off as well.
So, how do you cure complaining? I have five powerful cures to give you.
- Make thanksgiving a part of your everyday routine.
In 1 Thessalonians 5:18 we read, “Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” It is God’s will that you become a thankful person; so put it on your to-do list; add it to your daily schedule. Thank God intentionally and continually throughout your day. And please make sure you begin each day with thankfulness. Make the first words out of your mouth—even the first thoughts in your head each morning—words and thoughts full of thanksgiving.
You’ll probably have to train yourself to do this, if you’ve been in complaint mode very long. It is replacing bad habits with good habits, but if you are a Christ-follower, you have a mandate to give thanks in all circumstances, so I would just say, get with the program starting today.
- Adjust your expectations.
If you’ve been expecting life to be fair and easy and you live under the assumption that everyone should march in your parade and do what you think they should do, you have unrealistic expectations. So, adjust to the fact that you don’t have a perfect job, a perfect mate, a perfect child, a perfect church. Life is just plain messy and it’s not fair. And if you’ve been thinking that life owes you a smooth journey, throw those thoughts out and determine to focus on the good things in your life instead of majoring on the negative ones.
Remember, don’t complain about anything today.
Have you ever thought about the consequences of complaining? I mean, don’t most people consider complaining their right? Surely there’s something in our Constitution about free speech which says we have the right to complain about anything or anyone at any time—right? In fact, anyone who doesn’t complain on a somewhat regular basis must not be normal! That’s how lots of people look at it.
Well, I want to talk about this contagious disease called complaining, and I want to give you the antidote—the cure—for complaining. Here’s the facts about this very common and widespread disease: It affects your brain and your physical health in negative ways. When you indulge in complaining, it brings on a sense of sadness or melancholy, and causes real dissatisfaction with your life.
There’s real proof that negative stress like complaining can also exacerbate chronic health problems, such as diabetes or asthma. It literally can increase your headaches, your joint pain, and be a major cause of depression.
Now, I’m not talking about ignoring the negative issues of life. We don’t live in a perfect world, and we have to confront negative people and situations for the purpose of finding relief and solutions. So, I’m not suggesting that you “put on a happy face” and pretend nothing’s wrong. But I am advocating a change in your attitude toward complaining. I hope to convince you—if you are not already convinced—that complaining does you more harm than good and it is a contagious disease that causes lots of problems for lots of people.
And, of course, the more important issue is that it keeps you from the joy that is yours when you are rightly related to Jesus Christ, by grace through faith, and you have chosen to follow Christ. The Bible tells us that the joy of the Lord is our strength; habitual complaining destroys your joy and saps your energy, slowing you down and keeping you from doing what God put you here to do.
But the good news is, we can cure this disease of complaining when we turn to the Lord for help and follow his principles. So, would you like to be set free from complaining? Have you allowed it to have a place in your life so long that it is now almost an addiction? Well, there’s hope for you.
Do you sometimes feel like you’re pulled in two directions? It’s understandable if you do, because we know from the Bible that as believers we are to accept who we in Christ and be content with the way God has designed us. We know we’re not supposed to compare ourselves to others and envy who they are or what they have. We know we are each specially created by God like no one else and we should appreciate his handiwork in us.
But on the other hand, if you’re like me, you also know there are many things about yourself that you should not just accept. We all have blemishes and defects and areas of failure. We look at others who seem to have it much more together than we do and feel we should be like them. In other words, we know there is much room for improvement and needed maturity in some areas.
So, our dilemma is: How do we accept who we are when who we are is not all we should be? How can you believe that you’re really special just the way you are when you know, as I do, that you’re a long way from completion?
It almost seems like mission impossible. It appears to be a paradox with no solution. On the one hand we’re admonished to rejoice and celebrate who we are and on the other hand, we’re daily aware of our inadequacies and shortcomings.
Well, here’s what I’m coming to understand: I truly must accept and be contented with who I am and rejoice in how God has created and gifted me. But I want to have a holy discontentment with where I am in my growth and maturity. Contentment and lack of contentment at the same time. Or you could say, accepting who I am but not settling for where I am. As God has given me this new understanding, it has greatly helped to clear up my misunderstandings and apprehensions. I can do both at one time—accept and appreciate who I am in Christ and continually strive to grow more and more into what I was created to be.
Let’s look at some specific areas where we often have difficulty accepting who we are, but where we must also never settle for less than we can be.
Your Body
The Bible says that each of us is fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139: 13-14). God fashioned us in our mother’s womb, and he knew us before we were born. So, we should accept and be contented with how God’s hands made us and formed us because God doesn’t make mistakes.
Do you have negative eyesight? You know what I mean? When you look in the mirror, do you see only the negatives? Do any of these kind of thoughts plague you often:
- Oh, this hair; if only it were shorter or longer or thicker or thinner or blonde or brunette.
- Oh, this face; if I just had higher cheek bones, or could get rid of this double chin, or had a smaller nose.
- Oh, this body; if only I had longer legs, or thinner thighs, or smaller hips, or some kind of waistline!
Now, tell the truth, don’t we often tend to focus on the negatives.
In our society we’ve been led to think that the thin, shapely female body is the only acceptable one. And I don’t have to tell you the damage we’ve done to ourselves by swallowing this line of thinking. Anorexia and bulimia are two modern-day serious problems some women have because of their obsession with trying to make their bodies perfect.
I want to encourage you to be contented with the body God has given you. God has his purposes for your body just the way he created it. I think of my dear friend, Fran, who is now with Jesus. She was just barely five feet tall. All her life she was the shortest one around. But you know, God used her size to enlarge her ministry. You see, because she was short and cute, her appearance was rarely threatening or intimidating to anyone. It made it easy for her to make friends—and she made friends with everybody. In two seconds she would have you laughing and know all about you and you would love her. Combined with her personality, that short statue was a tool in God’s hands, and God used her in very special ways. It is not a mistake that she was a short person.
Not all of us were created with thin bodies, like the magazines depict as the shape to be. How crazy that we’ve allowed this culture to define only one shape that is considered credible and beautiful. It’s obvious that God likes all kinds of shapes—just look around you. How dull this world would be if we all came in one size and shape. No, there are many varieties of body shapes that are God-designed.
Accept the body and face and size and shape that God has given you. He has a reason and a purpose. Accept, but don’t settle. Keep that body running on all cylinders. Do everything you can to keep it healthy. Exercise as you know you should; get rid of some of those harmful eating habits. Be contented with your body, while at the same time never settling for anything less than the best it can be.
While we don’t want to get caught up in this world’s paranoid pursuit of the perfect body, we do want to be found faithful in taking care of what God has given us. This is an area where I struggle a lot, but I’ve made it a matter of prayer for years now, that God would strengthen me to do the things I know I should do for the sake of keeping my body strong and healthy, and yes, looking as good as possible. The Apostle Paul teaches us to bring our bodies into subjection so that we can run our race to the end and win the prize.
We don’t often categorize our physical well-being as a spiritual matter, but you know, it is. We will be held accountable for how well we’ve used our resources of physical strength and durability. The condition of your physical body has a direct relationship to your effectiveness in doing what God has called you to do.
Very recently I was struck by this passage from Psalm 92:12-15:
The righteous flourish like a palm tree. . .They will still bear fruit in old age, they will stay fresh and green, proclaiming, “The Lord is upright;…
As the years pile up, your body goes through changes. But I love this truth that we can still bear fruit even as we age, and be “full of sap and green.” I don’t want to run out of gas. I don’t want to be prohibited from ministry because my body fails me. Now, there are some physical problems over which you and I have no control. But to a great extent, our behavior and discipline determine how good we’re going to feel, how long we’re going to last, how clearly you can think, how fast you can react, how much you can accomplish. You don’t want to settle for anything less than God’s best for you—right?
So, accept the way God created you, but don’t settle for anything less than you can be physically.
Your Personality
Another thing you need to be contented with is your own personality. Each of us is unique; God doesn’t make cookie-cutter Christians. And our personalities are a key part of our identity. Some of us are “people people;” some are “project people.” Some of us are out-going and gregarious. Others are reserved and quiet. Some are leaders; others are followers. Some are extroverts, others are introverts. There are many variations in the personalities God has given us.
And each personality has its strengths. For example, a gregarious, out-going person makes friends easily and puts people at ease. But the quiet, reserved person is a very good listener who people turn to when they need a shoulder to cry on or an ear to listen. Because they are quiet, they rarely hurt people’s feelings or cause confrontations. They are often peacemakers.
Now, tell the truth, are you content with the personality God has given you? Do you even know what it’s like? You should, and you should appreciate that personality. I’ve mentioned how for many years I thought my take-charge entrepreneur type personality was a mistake; it seemed to me that women shouldn’t be like me. In fact, as a college student I tried once to change my personality. I thought by a set of my will I could be like some other girls at my college who seemed to have more appropriate personalities than I did. The effort did not succeed; in fact, it was a total flop. Not only did I fail to change my personality, but I came off as phony and insincere—which of course I was!
Even though it’s taken me far too long, I’ve finally come to really appreciate the personality that God has given to me, as awkward as it may be at times, and I like the way God has made me. I don’t have a need to be like other women any longer, and of course, that is great freedom. It also means I can appreciate others much more, because I’m not comparing myself to them or competing with them—at least not often! It releases me from jealousy and envy.
The challenge is to be contented with who you are but not where you are in your growth. Focus on the personality flaws that accompany your personality, pray about them, and ask God to polish you, get rid of the rough edges.
For example, I am a project-oriented person, but that doesn’t give me an excuse for being insensitive to people. Just because I’m a doer, I still must take time for meditation and planning and quiet time. My personality is the talker type; I have no problem talking—as you can tell. But I must learn to listen even though it doesn’t come naturally to me.
It’s true for all of us—our personalities have strengths and weaknesses. You must be able to appreciate the strengths and enjoy who you are, but never be content with the flaws that are inherent in your personalities. We can’t use that old excuse, “Well, that’s just the way I am!” I’ve noticed when we use that cop-out phrase, it’s usually an excuse for not facing our personality flaws and an unwillingness to make needed changes.
Now, it’s important that the two go together: Accepting but not settling. You see, when you can truly accept and appreciate the good things about the way God created your personality, then you are not destroyed to discover that there are some weaknesses that exist. If you’re not willing to face your personality weakness, it could be because you haven’t yet learned to appreciate your strengths. The two go together.
Second Corinthians 3:18 says we are being transformed into the likeness of Jesus Christ with ever-increasing glory. You don’t have to have a different personality to be transformed into the likeness of Jesus. You just have to polish the rough edges of the one you have, while appreciating the strengths.
There is wonderful freedom in accepting who you are. Freedom from having to live up to other’s expectations—or even your own. Freedom from having to be like others or compete with others. Freedom from the need to prove to the world that you are someone special, because you already know you’re someone special to God. It really takes the monkey off your back!
I’ve been talking about how to be content in a job you hate. Notice I didn’t say “with” a job you hate, but “in” a job you hate. I believe there are times when you should actively pursue another job or another career, when the right thing to do is find a place to work which uses your abilities better or get more education so you can advance to better jobs, or simply find a better working environment.
But if you’re in a job you hate, however long you are going to be in that job, as a Christian, you should learn to be content in that job. The Apostle Paul said he learned to be content in any circumstance, and he was in some very bad situations. If he can learn contentment, so can we.
Let me tell you the story of a woman in Wisconsin who found herself in a job she hated. It is a manufacturing job with repetitive and boring duties. She graduated from college with very good grades but found herself in this job that was beneath her.
Finally, after hearing my message on “The Freedom of a Captive Mind,” she decided to change her attitude about that job and to think of it as her mission field. She began reprogramming her mind with Scripture, memorizing verses on the job, and singing songs of praise in that factory job.
Her co-workers noticed the change in her. They began to ask her to sing her songs, and many times she was able to share the Scripture she was memorizing in conversations with different individuals. She started praying for her co-workers, and they began to come to her with their needs and ask her to pray for them.
She was able to lead one of her co-workers to know Jesus as her Savior and has touched the lives of all who work with her. Yes, the work is boring, but it gives her time to memorize Scripture while working and that has been a wonderful healing process in her own life. She has found contentment in a job she hated because she has seen it through the eyes of eternity, and asked God to use her there. He is.
I challenge you to ask God to change your attitude and make you content right where you are, so that you are a light shining in darkness in that corner of the world.
(Click here to download the devotional for the entire week.)
If you find yourself in a job you don’t like, you need to know that you can learn to be content right where you are. And when you learn that, you are in a win-win situation, because you no longer allow yourself to be a victim of your job circumstances.
If you want to learn to be content with that job you hate, ask God what he has to teach you through it. Have you gone to God and said, “Lord, I’m in a job I hate and I can’t get out. Why am I here? What are you trying to teach me or do through me in this job?”
You remember Joseph, sold into slavery in Egypt by his brothers and treated unfairly and cruelly by his captors, wrongly imprisoned for two years for doing the right thing. Then God delivered him from that prison and he became second in command to the Pharaoh (Genesis 37-41).
Joseph said of his bad experience that his brothers meant harm to him when they sold him into slavery, but God meant it for good (Genesis 50:20). Joseph allowed God to turn a terrible experience into a blessing. But please note that God was able to turn it into a blessing because Joseph was willing to let him.
God may have you in that job you hate because he has a blessing there for you, but because of your attitude, he can’t work that blessing for you yet. If Joseph had gotten bitter or remained angry or been rebellious, he would probably would have just rotted in that prison.
Are you rotting in your miserable job because you haven’t given God permission to use it in your life for good? Believe me, there are miracles waiting for you in that job you hate, if you will in humility make up your mind to work for God and seek his reward and look for the good that God wants to do for you and through you right where you are.
You’ll know contentment even in a miserable job if you have that attitude in you. It’s the attitude that Jesus had when he was willing to leave heaven and come to earth to die for us. Surely it was a job he didn’t relish, but he knew God would work redemption through it, and so he submitted to the good that God wanted to do by sending him to a job he did not enjoy.
Do you have a hard time making yourself go to work each day because you hate your job? As believers in the marketplace, we need to show an attitude toward our jobs that is different from the non-believers, and whether we like our jobs or not, we should learn to be content with those jobs as long as we have them.
Paul wrote to the Philippians that he had learned to be content in any circumstance, and we can learn it, too. So, if you want to enroll in Contentment 101, here’s the next lesson to learn: Work for recognition and reward but not earthly recognition and reward!
The reality of most work environments is that expressions of appreciation and recognition are often few and far between. So, if you hate your job because you never get the recognition or appreciation you deserve, I’ve got great news for you. You can be content in that job you hate because when you work for the Lord, Colossians 3:24 says that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward.
You see, God has a recognition and incentive program better than any employer could ever dream up, and if you perform your everyday work duties as unto him, you’re going to be recognized and rewarded by the Lord, whether your employer ever appreciates you or not.
So, if you feel you’re not receiving the earthly rewards you deserve, rejoice to know that you can be assured of a heavenly reward. If you’re doing a good job and nobody says “thank you,” just remember that someday you’ll get the “thank you” you deserve from a higher level of management. That is, of course, if you’re working for Jesus and not for people.
So, if you’re in a job you hate, you can learn to be content if you will live in the knowledge that your recognition and reward are coming from God. It’s a big change of attitude, but the Holy Spirit has the power to make that change inside of you if you give him that permission. I pray you will.
Do you hate your job? Studies show that a large percentage of workers really don’t like their jobs. Maybe you hate it because it’s boring, or because the people you work with are difficult, or because you have an impossible boss.
Well, if you have a job you hate, here’s what you do: Change employers. That’s right—just change employers right now, today. You’re probably thinking, “But I can’t just change jobs like that—today.” Oh, I didn’t say change jobs; I said change employers.
Paul wrote to the Colossians: “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart as working for the Lord, not for human masters” (Colossians 3:23). Did you realize you can change employers without changing jobs? Just say out loud, “I no longer work for that company or that person; I have a new boss. I now work for the Lord.”
Keep that thought in your mind all day long as you’re working and keep telling yourself over and over this truth: “I report to Jesus. Therefore, I must be careful how I act and I need to watch my attitude, because I report to Jesus.”
I don’t care how tough your job is or how much you hate it, if you work for Jesus, if you consider him your boss, if you continually remind yourself that you will give an account to him as to how you have performed in your job, and furthermore, that he will reward you if you do a good job, you can be content right there in that job you hate.
Believe me, I know because I’ve had to practice this myself. For three years I worked in a job I hated and wanted to leave. The first year there I did everything I could to find another job, and nothing happened. Finally, I realized God had me there for some purpose, and I decided to work for God, not for that company and not for that impossible boss.
As soon as I changed employers, I was content in that job. And God taught me lessons for the next two years in that job I hated which I could not have learned anywhere else. He also used me to witness to others who worked there. But nothing good happened until I changed employers.
If you’ve been working for an earth-person, or for yourself even, you’ve been working for the wrong person. Make this biblical principle a reality in your life today: Don’t work for people or money or a company, work for Jesus. I promise you, you can be content in a job you hate if you work for the right person.
It could be that you have a job you really hate. If you could, you would quit tomorrow but you feel like you’re in a prison because you need a job, you’ve got time and benefits invested in this job, and yet you hate the job.
I can understand your feelings because I’ve had a job or two like that myself. But the Apostle Paul wrote to the Philippians:
…I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation…. I can do everything through him who gives me strength (Philippians 4:11-13).
So, I want to talk about how to be content in a job you hate. You know, if you can learn this secret of being content, as Paul learned it, you can’t lose because your fulfillment and satisfaction will not be based on circumstances—not based on whether you have a terrific job that you love or one that you really hate!
Keep in mind that Paul had to learn this secret of being content, and so do you and I. So, are you willing to enroll in Contentment 101, and learn how to be content with your job? That’s where it begins. If you’re not willing to learn to be content, of course, you never will learn it.
If you insist on saying, “I hate this job, I refuse to change my attitude toward this job, I could never be content with this job and furthermore I don’t want to be content with it,” then you’ve already prevented God from changing you and giving you a new heart and a new attitude.
First of all, you have to give up your rights. Most of us think things like, “I don’t deserve this job,” or “I deserve to have a fulfilling job,” or “It’s not right that I have to work at a job that doesn’t utilize my talents,” or “I can’t be expected to endure the kind of treatment I get on my job.” That’s just our normal nature, which has been fed and fired up by our humanistic society, teaching us that we have our rights.
That doesn’t mean that you’re condemned to a job you hate forever, but if you can learn to be content for as long as you are there, when you do leave—if you do leave—you will not be running away. You will leave in victory not defeat, and you will have learned how to be content even in a job that is certainly not your dream job. So, if you are willing to relinquish your “rights” to have the job you want and learn to be content where you are, you’re in for an amazing discovery. Think about that.
Are you in or staying in a job that you don’t like? Mary Lowman and Lisa Bishop wrestle with what it looks like to have eyes to see what you can learn and stay well until things change.
I’ve made many decisions that were wrong, some more so than others. The worst decisions were the ones I knew were wrong when I made them. But there have been others that were not so intentional, just misguided. For example, financial decisions that were made too hastily and ended up costing me money.
But I’m here to tell you that God remembers our frame and knows that we are dust, so it doesn’t surprise him to see how often we make wrong decisions. What must, however, break his heart is to see how we wallow in those wrong decisions and allow them to keep us living in guilt and despair instead of taking our medicine and going forward. What must break God’s heart is to see how we don’t learn lessons that we need to learn from our wrong decisions, and we keep making the same ones over and over. It must indeed grieve God to see that we don’t allow him to turn our deserts into gardens and our ashes into beauty.
God can give you the grace to live with whatever bad or wrong decision you have made, even the ones that last for a lifetime if you will allow him to do that in your life. And you will be amazed at how you can find joy and peace and fulfillment and be used of God even though you’ve made some wrong choices and bad decisions.
That’s the kind of God we serve. He has all power. He can do anything. Are you willing to let him take your wrong decision today and make something good out of it? Are you willing to stop using your bad choices as excuses for not going forward with God and being a blessing to others? Are you willing to allow him to put your past behind you so you can be all that God wants you to be? Are you willing to learn from those wrong decisions, so you don’t heap bad decisions upon bad decisions? If so, you can find a fresh start today, even though you may have to live with the consequences of your wrong decisions.
(Click here to download the devotional for the entire week.)
Are you now living with the consequences of some wrong decision in your life? All of us face those consequences at times. Some of us perhaps made bad decisions out of ignorance. Obviously, if we had known where these bad decisions would lead, we wouldn’t have made them. But in most cases, it wasn’t that we didn’t know better; it was rather that we chose to ignore the potential consequences.
Living with Wrong Decisions
So, you’ve made some wrong decisions. What do you do now? Is life over? Is there no way back? Yes, of course—our God can give you a life of hope and ministry, if you first:
- Own up to your wrong decisions.
Don’t live in denial. Don’t keep shifting blame. Don’t try to ignore it. Don’t make up excuses. Just get it out in the open—first with God. Confess it to him. Then you may or may not need to talk about it with someone else. But call it what it is.
- Refuse to live in despair.
You serve a God of second chances—many second chances. You don’t have to live in despair, even over bad decisions that have affected your entire life. So:
You married the wrong person. You had an abortion. You committed adultery or fornication. You spent money you should not have spent. You lied to your boss. You chose the wrong career. You went to the wrong school. You walked away from God and the church. You bought the wrong house. You ate the wrong food. You chose the wrong friend. You went to the wrong church.
I don’t know what is on your list, but I know that God wants to make an example of how he can still be glorified, even in the midst of your wrong decisions.
- Start where you are and go forward.
Don’t wallow in the despair of your wrong decision. Here are two encouraging passages from Isaiah:
Isaiah 51:3: The Lord will surely comfort Zion and will look with compassion on all her ruins; he will make her deserts like Eden, her wastelands like the garden of the Lord. Joy and gladness will be found in her, thanksgiving and the sound of singing.
Isaiah 58:11: The Lord will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail.
I’ve noticed how easy it is for us women to make wrong decisions when it comes to men.
Bathsheba
Bathsheba’s decision to have an adulterous relationship with King David was a very wrong decision. Was she intimidated by his authority? Or could she have been immensely flattered by his attention?
We need to be aware that we women are often prone to make very bad decisions when it comes to men. Our natural desire to have a husband and family can become an obsession that causes us to lower our standards, overlook obvious danger signals and end up in illegitimate relationships or wrong marriages.
I remember when a friend informed me of her engagement, and I rejoiced with her. She said, “He was well worth waiting for.” She was in her early thirties and had watched friends and family members much younger than her get married. There were times of pain and loneliness, but now she is so grateful that she waited for the right man that God had for her.
I urge you to be extremely cautious about relationships with men. Don’t make decisions based on your emotions or your needs. The consequences of those wrong decisions affect the rest of your life.
I’ve pointed out three women in the Bible who made wrong decisions, and they had to suffer the consequences. For Eve, it was banishment from Eden and a perfect life. For Sarah, she ignited an animosity between races that still troubles our world today. And for Bathsheba, she lost her good husband Uriah, whom David had killed. Then she lost the baby she and David conceived.
Decisions always bring consequences. And when we don’t make good decisions, we cannot expect to avoid the consequences.
Did you ever wonder why the Bible records all the mistakes and blunders of even the good people? It’s because God wants to teach us how to deal with the mistakes and blunders of our lives. What wrong decisions have you made?
Sarah
Sarah made some bad decisions. You remember how she decided to give Hagar, her maid, to her husband so she could bear a child that would become Sarah’s child and the child God had promised to Sarah and Abraham. Sarah thought that God didn’t know about her biological clock, didn’t understand that she was beyond childbearing years. So, she decided to get what she wanted her way.
But then, when Hagar gave birth to a son by Abraham, Sarah didn’t like the decision she had made. She became extremely jealous of Hagar and the boy, Ishmael. So, what does she do? She heaps a bad decision upon a bad decision. She has Hagar banished along with Ishmael, and that began an enmity that has caused incalculable harm and pain since then.
When you’ve made one bad decision, don’t let your emotions cause you to make an even worse one in order to try to correct the bad decision. Sometimes you have to live with your bad decisions. Sarah needed to live with Hagar and Ishmael. That might have been uncomfortable at times, but it would have been a whole lot better than what she did.
When we make a decision that affects our whole life—such as a decision to marry someone—the consequences of a wrong decision are even greater. I think of a woman I know who would probably say that her decision to marry her husband was not a good decision and her marriage has not been easy. But she has not heaped another bad decision on top of that decision. She has fought for her marriage, and while it may never be all she dreamed it would be, she has a marriage that works.
Even your bad decision can be used for good by our incredible God.
What wrong decision are you now living with? I can assure you that I have made some wrong decisions along the way. Who hasn’t? So, let’s talk about living with wrong decisions.
The Bible gives us examples of people who made very wrong decisions.
Eve
Starting with Eve: Her wrong decision is infamous. Eve was ushered into a perfect world. No pain, no relationship problems, no hard work, no stress, no bad hair days—nothing bad, everything good. Eve belies the philosophy that if we give people the right environment, they will be good people and do the right thing. In the midst of Eden, she made a very wrong, very bad decision—to eat the forbidden fruit.
Why did she do this? Because she wasn’t content with what she had. You see, we often think that if our circumstances were just more favorable, we’d be content. But I want to tell you this: If you’re not content with where you are now, you’re not likely to be content even if your circumstances improve.
If you’re not content as a single person, you won’t be content as a married one. If you’re not content in the house you’re in now, you won’t be content in a bigger, better house. If you’re not content with your mate the way he or she is, you won’t be content with another one. If you’re not content in the job where you are now, you probably won’t be content with a better job.
Contentment is a choice we make, not a set of circumstances. The Apostle Paul wrote: “I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances,” (Philippians 4:11b). and you can learn contentment, too. Any area of your life where you are not now contented is a potential danger area—ripe for bad decisions.
With what or whom are you discontent? Your job? Your looks? Your financial situation? Your mate? Your lack of a mate? Your children or lack of children? If you don’t learn to be content, you will walk right into a danger zone and that’s when you are most likely to make bad decisions.
So many choices! Some small and routine and some pretty big ones. Join Mary Lowman and Lisa Bishop as they chat about choices you wish you could redo. We all have made choices in our life that didn’t go well. Words we said that we can’t undo, business choices that didn’t go as expected, family/relationship choices that left painful memories. Mary and Lisa share some of their choices that didn’t go as well as they could have and how they are growing in their choice making.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Have you ever felt fearful, anxious, or depressed? Overwhelmed by darkness that seems to be surrounding you on all sides? There have been times in my Christian journey that have felt dark. Stretches of days and sometimes weeks or months when weariness has weighed on me. And uncertain and painful times when I have worked hard to muster up hope while clinging to God trying to remember his faithfulness.
Have you experienced that? If you have been following Jesus any amount of time, there will come seasons in your life when the darkness will try to overwhelm you. It’s in those times that choosing a new perspective will pull you through. We don’t like dark seasons. They seem unfruitful and unproductive. But if you try to see darkness with new eyes it can produce hope.
It reminds me of a seed. When you are trying to grow a new plant or tomato garden, what do you do with the seeds? You bury them! The hope of producing something beautiful and fruitful begins with being buried underground and surrounded by dirt. It’s in the darkness that over time the seed sprouts in the soil and starts to rise up, breaking through the surface. What was once buried becomes flourishing and fruitful.
Our seeds of faith are similar. This is when you must choose to see the darkness as a time where God is with you and providing for you in every season, even in the darkness. Because that is who God is. He is provider. So that means that even in the most difficult times there is provision, but it will require a new perspective and hope in the waiting.
Romans 8:26-28 (MSG) reminds us:
“The moment we get tired in the waiting, God’s Spirit is right alongside helping us along. If we don’t know how or what to pray, it doesn’t matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans. He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God. That’s why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good.”
Just like the seed of the plant needs to be watered, nourished and exposed to sunlight, so does your faith. To fully experience the hope-filled perspective of dark seasons you will need to nourish your faith by spending time reading the Bible, receiving God’s love, rehearsing God’s truth, and praying prayers of thanksgiving. These practices will be the nourishment, protection, and provision you need for your faith to flourish.
When you feel surrounded by darkness remember that Jesus is the one who is ultimately surrounding you, covering you and hemming you in on all sides. Seeds sprout in dirt. All you need is faith the size of a mustard seed.
(Click here to download the devotional for the entire week.)
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
A few years ago, I was sitting in a coffee shop and there was a pen on the table that read, “Choose the pain of discipline over the pain of regret.” I think it was marketing a weight loss program but isn’t that a powerful statement that can apply to just about anything in life? The choices you make today will impact your tomorrow. And while the decisions and actions you choose today may be hard and require all of the strength, determination and willpower you can muster, they will ultimately lead to your future. Will you choose the pain of discipline over the pain of regret? All too often you can sell out to the pleasure of today and be left to deal with the consequences of your choices.
It reminds me of one of my favorite verses, 1 Corinthians 10:13: “No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.”
Life will have its fair share of temptations. Whether it’s the temptation to lash out at your spouse, get angry in traffic, fall back on your word, or flirt with a married coworker. The temptation to fail to follow-through on a project or forgo your healthy eating and workout plan because binging on Netflix or a bag of potato chips just seems more satisfying in the moment. Now let me be clear, I have been known to binge on potato chips so you are not alone. The point is, we all have desired outcomes for our marriage, our careers, our relationships, our physical, mental, and spiritual health. Achieving the things you say you want will require sacrifice. Becoming the person God created you to be will require you to overcome temptations rather than choosing to let them overcome you. You will need to exchange the pursuit of instant gratification for the pain of discipline.
Jesus will help you to master self-control rather than be mastered by lack of it. Don’t think you are going to be able to endure a temptation when you are in the heat of it without a plan of escape. Making decisions in advance of temptations is critical. Avoid temptation when you can so you don’t get caught up in it. Don’t put yourself in situations that will lure you into compromise. And remember that when you are tempted, not if, when, God will also provide a way out. He gives you the strength and the will to choose to endure the pull of the temptation, to bear the weight of it but not be weighed down by it!
Where is discipline lacking in your life? What new life-giving choices will you create in this new year? Choose the pain of discipline now over the pain of regret later.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Are you speaking the language of heaven or hell? “Grumbling is the language of hell.” That statement stopped me in my tracks. It felt so poignant, so in your face, so true. And grumbling comes directly from your disposition, your attitude.
Philippians 2:14-16 says, “Do everything without grumbling or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, ‘children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation.’ Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky as you hold firmly to the word of life.”
So what is attitude anyway? It’s the mental state or position you take as it relates to your life, and circumstances surrounding you. Your attitude is not what you think but how you think it, and your attitude frames every event in your life whether you realize it or not. Out of your attitude flows your enjoyment of life and gratitude for all your blessings or your disappointment and anger at how things have turned out. Everyday your attitude is challenged by other people and by external factors.
My attitude tends to be challenged when I am driving, when a coworker is getting on my nerves, or when someone is in the self-checkout lane at the grocery store with 50 items! Your attitude might tend to go sideways in similar ways or maybe it’s the weather that you let affect your attitude or the fact that it’s Monday… again. The point is, while you cannot control everything that happens in life you can control your attitude. You can choose your disposition on a daily basis.
If you were to monitor your attitude, what would you notice? Is your attitude set on positive or negative? Glass half-empty or half full? Is your disposition dialed to joyful in all circumstances, patient, forgiving, sacrificial. Or is your attitude’s automatic response set to grumpy, impatient, bitter, critical, or self-serving? When things are not going as you planned or people are not acting in the way you want, how will you react? Will you let a negative or inconsiderate person ruin your day or tempt you to lose your cool? Or will you be in control of your own internal weather? I am not saying it is always easy, but it is possible. You are the master of your internal world and you have a Master who will help you when you ask him, Jesus.
As a matter of fact, Philippians 2:5 is an imperative for every follower of Christ. The apostle Paul says, you should have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had. As ambassadors of Christ, we are called to be like Jesus. And a Christlike attitude will make a difference in you and enable you to make a difference in the world around you.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Have you ever thought about the choices you make on a daily basis? Proverbs 18:21 says, “Words kill, words give life; they’re either poison or fruit—you choose” (MSG).
You choose.
Now I know you are very aware of what it means to choose but here is a refresher. The dictionary definition of choose is, “To select from a number of possible alternatives; decide on and pick out. To determine.”
I want to share that definition with you because I think sometimes it can be easy to forget that you have the ability to be selective about what you say. All too often you can find yourself saying everything you think before putting your words through a holy filter. Minding your words takes intention.
Do your words—the things you say to yourself about yourself, the things you say to your co-worker, spouse, friend, neighbor—act as poison, bringing destruction and death to a soul? Or are your words life-giving to those who hear them?
In the workplace it can be all too tempting to have loose lips that spew gossip, criticism, and complaining. When you are with your friends you can easily fall into the trap of dissing someone who is not around and talking behind their back. Don’t do that. You do not want to be the person dragging others down with their words. And if you find yourself in a group that is getting their kicks by criticizing others, run for the hills. Refuse to join in. Words are a slippery slope.
In Luke 6:45, Jesus says, “A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.”
The words you say in your head and out loud reflect something deeper. They flow from what’s in your heart. If there is bitterness, greed, jealousy, pride, anger, superiority, or inferiority in your heart, your words will follow suit. But when there is love, joy, gratitude, peace, trust and confidence in Jesus in your heart, your words will be like fruit. Sweet and soothing to the soul.
At any given moment you have a number of possible alternatives when it comes to choosing what comes out of your mouth. Choose your words wisely and remember that today you have the power to decide if you will bring life to the people you interact with or death. Choose life.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
If I were to plug into your mind, what would I hear? What thoughts do you find yourself playing on repeat?
If your thoughts were a Spotify playlist, what would the title be? Think about it. You know, it’s been said that your thoughts determine your life. In other words, where your thoughts go, your life will follow. Where are your thoughts leading you? What thoughts do you find yourself dwelling on? What words do you find yourself regularly rehearsing? Are they life-giving, producing gratitude, hope, and peace? Or do your thoughts lead to worry, anxiety, perhaps even anger, self-pity, or self-defeat?
There’s a quote that says, “Each day stand guard at the door of your mind.” As challenging as it is, you have the responsibility to be the curator of the information you consume and the things you dwell on. Now it’s not possible to choose every thought that enters your mind: some will slip through the cracks. But you totally have the power to pick the thoughts you will allow to penetrate your heart and mind.
So, stand guard at the door! Picture yourself like a bouncer at a concert venue. Be ready to kick out any thought that is not allowed a ticket of admission! When a thought enters your mind that does not align with God’s thoughts, ask God to help you give it the boot. Thoughts like:
- I will never amount to anything.
- I am a failure.
- I don’t have what it takes.
- God doesn’t really care about me.
- I am not lovable.
- I will always be alone.
- I will never measure up.
- I will always be stuck in this addiction.
- My life will never change
These thoughts do not deserve renting space in your head and just because you think something, it does not make it true.
Choose what you will focus on. Notice I used the word choose. Oftentimes I think we take the position of being a casual bystander of our thoughts, we leave our thoughts unchecked and let them consume us and ultimately rule us. We can get captured by our thoughts rather than holding our thoughts captive to Christ. Second Corinthians 10:5 instructs us to, “…Demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.”
Subject all of your thinking to Jesus. Examine your thoughts to see if they align with God’s thoughts and choose to do something with the ones that are not well-pleasing to God before they enter your heart and become a part of you.
In the next 24 hours, take inventory of your thoughts. Are they life-giving or life sucking? Are they worthy of praise or do they cause a panic? Being mindful of what you meditate on is a really important discipline as followers of Jesus.
Presented by Lisa Bishop
When you are in a difficult season, it can be easy to let your trust waiver. It can be tempting to buy into the lie that God has forgotten about you; to think that God doesn’t really care and that the hardship, loss, or feeling of a lack of direction will never end. When fear of an unknown future causes anxiety or despair it’s a time you will find yourself at a crossroad, a point where you will need to make an important decision, a critical choice.
Will you cling to God and trust him and his faithfulness? Or, will you lean on your own obstructed view, your limited understanding, and succumb to doubt and discouragement, maybe even despair?
Now when I ask this question, I want to make it clear that throughout your Christian journey there will be many crossroads where your faith and trust in Jesus will be tested. Trusting Jesus in all circumstances is something we continue to grow in. It is a lifelong pursuit. In our perfectly curated social media world, we don’t talk much about the messiness of life—a failing marriage, faltering faith, being fired from a job. We see snippets of each other’s lives and think that something must be wrong with ours because while we are dealing with overwhelming fears and anxieties, other people’s worlds look like the fantasy that we wish we were living. But trials and the messiness of life are part of being human. Sometimes we don’t want to be human. We want life to be perfect and it’s not. And after all, that is why we need hope and faith in Jesus, because you will have trials and the hardships of life will test you.
James 1:2-4 reminds us: “Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don’t try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way” (MSG).
Do you consider it a sheer gift when trials and testing, when waiting and uncertainty come your way? It is so hard to trust God in times of trial. We want to wiggle out of the discomfort and get relief from the pressure. We want God to answer us now because we can’t bear the weight of the unknown. Yet these hard places are the very times that your faith matures when you make the choice to trust, to persevere when your faith is tried.
When I think about choosing to trust God in the uncertainty it reminds me of the Israelites and their journey to freedom. In the book of Exodus, we read about God’s freedom mission. The book of Exodus describes a climactic moment in the life of God’s people. It tells the story of the Israelite’s deliverance from slavery in Egypt by the Lord’s mighty hand. For 400 plus years the people of God were subjected to harsh labor conditions by Pharaoh. As you read the first part of Exodus you witness Pharaoh’s relentless refusal to let God’s people go even after God demonstrates his mighty power and brings several disasters in the form of plagues to Egypt. After the tenth plague Pharaoh finally agrees to release the Israelites and so begins their journey to the Promised Land.
And then this happens next in Exodus 13:17: “When Pharaoh let the people go, God did not lead them on the road through the Philistine country, though that was shorter. For God said, ‘If they face war they might change their minds and return to Egypt’. So God led the people around the desert road toward the Red Sea” (Exodus 17:17-18a).
Did you catch that? Here the Israelites have been in captivity for 400 plus years, they are finally getting their taste of freedom and God chooses not to lead them on the road that was shorter. He leads them around the desert towards the Red Sea. You and I have the benefit of knowing how the story ends, but the Israelites didn’t know that the reason God was taking them down a less than obvious path was because he knew what was ahead. The all-knowing God knew that if the Israelites would have taken the shorter route they would have traveled through enemy territory and that would have caused them to want to return back to Egypt. Fear would have caused them to forgo freedom and find themselves living back in captivity.
When you are in a season of uncertainty and the road ahead is unclear or obscured, it is easy to cry out to God and say, “Why is this taking so long?” “What are you doing, God?” “Are we there yet?”
Often God’s ways just do not make sense. There are times in your life where with your limited view you see a shorter or what seems to be a more desirable or efficient path and wonder why God seems to be inserting a detour or a delay, and it can be devastating. And this is where choice comes in. In the moments where things don’t make sense in your human understanding, will you choose to rely on your own perspective, or will you choose to press into God and trust him?
Proverbs 3:5-6 gives us great words of wisdom. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him; and he will make your paths straight.”
The Message version lays down wisdom like this: “Trust God from the bottom of your heart; don’t try to figure out everything on your own. Listen for God’s voice in everything you do, everywhere you go; he’s the one who will keep you on track” (Proverbs 3:5-6).
Why is it so hard to trust God when we see his faithfulness all throughout the Bible and when we have experienced his track record, his trustworthiness at other points throughout our life? Trusting God is a constant and consistent decision we need to make. And the choice is not based on your circumstances but grounded in God’s character.
And part of God’s character is that he is omniscient, which means he is all knowing. He is the only one who sees the big picture, and as my friend says, has an aerial view! Isaiah 55:8–9 reminds us that God says, “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways. . . . As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”
God’s infinite thoughts are far greater than your limited ability to comprehend them. His ways don’t always make sense to you, but you can rest in the knowledge that he is always good which means that everything he does ultimately will be turned for your good.
But our human hearts are filled with questions for God. “Why?” “When?” “How?” We often wrestle with faith because of those questions. How can we fully trust a God we don’t understand? How can we have faith when God’s ways seem even, dare I say, unloving at times? When you try to comprehend God’s ways, you can become frustrated. His ways are higher than your ways, and his actions often do not make sense to our earthly minds.
Let’s take a look back at the journey of the Israelites. While it seemed crazy that God would lead them to a place where they were surrounded by their enemies and boxed in by a body of water with nowhere to escape, it is eventually at the Red Sea where the Israelites are once and for all freed from the Egyptians. While the Israelites had no way of knowing how the plan would unfold they did know that God had promised them freedom, and yet their current circumstances had them freaking out.
In fact further in Exodus as the Israelites see their enemies approaching, Exodus 14:10b-12 says, “They were terrified and cried out to The Lord. They said to Moses, “Was it because there were no graves in Egypt that you brought us to the desert to die? What have you done to us by bringing us out of Egypt? Didn’t we say to you in Egypt, ‘Leave us alone; let us serve the Egyptians? It would have been better for us to serve the Egyptians than die in the desert!”
In the midst of uncertainty, the Israelites were willing to go back to captivity. In the face of their fear of the future they were willing to forfeit freedom. Rather than choosing to trust an unknown future to a known God, they choose fear over believing God’s faithfulness. Can you relate?
Maybe you have thought, “God you say you are good but this situation doesn’t feel so good, I don’t see a way through.” Or, “God, you say that you will never leave me or forsake me but it certainly seems like you are silent.”
Where has fear taken over in your life? How are you forgetting the faithfulness and the promise of God? That he is for you, will not leave or abandon you. He will lead you, guide you, and fight for you: He knows what he is doing. Even though you may not be able to make sense of the twists and turns, God sees you. Even when God’s ways do not make sense, he has a plan.
In verse 13 Moses speaks back to the Israelites overwhelming concern and worry and says, “Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance The Lord will bring you today. The Egyptians you see today you will never see again. The Lord will fight for you; you need only be still” (Exodus 13:13-14).
I know what it’s like to be in a place of fear, uncertainty, and doubt. I know what it’s like to wonder and question if God really cares and if he is going to come through. You might be in a season of job loss and you see no opportunities on the horizon. Maybe you are in a really difficult season in your marriage and you just don’t see it getting better. Or, you have a kid that is wayward and you fear what their future holds. Maybe you had a bad review at work, and you fear losing your job. You long to be married and fear what a life of singleness means for you. You are in a financial crisis and you don’t see a way out.
It is in these moments when you only see a sliver of the picture that you have a choice to make. Will you trust God? And it’s not based on feeling, it’s based on facts. God says,
- Do not be afraid.
- Stand firm.
- You will see deliverance.
- The Lord will fight for you, you need only be still.
The Lord sees you and what you are going through. While it may seem like he is silent, he’s not. The waiting can be gut wrenching but trust that God is actively at work in your life. Don’t lose hope or get weary because it’s on God’s timeline and not yours. Anxiety and worry will try to rear their ugly heads and rule your thoughts and emotions, but these verses are a reminder that God is working on your behalf. These truths are your reminder in uncertain times to compose yourself with confidence in God. When it seems like there is no way out and no way through, this is the time when your faith life is forced into the open and no matter how difficult it is you are called to stand firm in the truth.
We have an insatiable desire to know the future and manage everything in our lives. It is as though we know better than God and our plans and methods are better. When your false illusion of control is shattered, you are called to surrender to your Heavenly Father who knows you and loves you.At just the right time, when things seemed hopeless, God parted the waters and made a way for his people to pass through unharmed, and for their enemies to be defeated.
Just as he did with the Israelites, he will make a way for what seems impossible to you.
This is where faith needs to trump your feelings. It is important to notice what you are feeling and resist letting your feelings rule you. Bring your emotions to God. Renew your mind. Immerse yourself in the Bible. Remind yourself of all of the stories when God came through for his people. Sometimes you need that! Reminders, recounting, and rehearsing truth to yourself.
As a matter of fact, as you start a new year it could be a great opportunity to start a new habit. Take the time to write down all of the ways God has been faithful to you throughout the years. Get yourself in the rhythm of journaling and writing down ways you see God at work in your life. Sometimes you need to train your eyes to see. If that sounds overwhelming, find a way to record and remember that works for you. Something you can look back to that will keep you grounded and hopeful through all of life’s ups and downs, reminding you that God has a plan and to trade your fear, disillusionment, and dismay for trusting in him.
When you are struggling, say, “Jesus help me!” “God be merciful to me.” “Holy Spirit, open my eyes to see all of the ways you are helping me.”
Make the choice to trust. Declare, “Lord, I choose to trust you because you are trustworthy!”
Remember to praise God in all seasons and practice the praise of the Psalmist in Psalm 34:1. “I will praise the LORD at all times. I will constantly speak his praise” (NLT).
What parent hasn’t said to a small child, “Now, play well with your friends.” We try to motivate them to play with consideration, not to be selfish, to share their toys—to “play nice” as we say. Well, don’t you think we need to “work nice” with our fellow workers?
Here’s one last suggestion for working well at work: Help others to find their greatness, to develop and use their talents and skills. This applies not only to those in management, but all of us can look for ways to help others grow in their job and become better at what they do.
For example, if you are particularly skilled in some software program, and you recognize a coworker who is technically gifted, you could offer to coach them in that area. Not only would that benefit the new employee, but the growth of individual employees benefits the whole. The organization would be immeasurably better if we all simply helped others find their greatness, realize their potential.
I think we would be shocked if we knew how much time, productivity and success is lost simply because we don’t share with each other. I remember reading an article about the terrible Columbia Space Shuttle disaster in 2003. They have determined that some of the technical issues that caused the disaster were a result of lack of proper communication between different specialties, an unwillingness to share knowledge and research. If that is true, it makes the tragedy so much worse, doesn’t it?
Jesus gave us the greatest example of equipping others to succeed. He began with twelve unqualified men, he taught them, he role-modeled for them, and then after his resurrection, he sent the Holy Spirit to indwell them and empower them so that they could be all he intended them to be. He equipped them—and he still equips us today. If you’re born from above, you have the Holy Spirit indwelling you, and he gives you the power to work well with others, to love others, to be a true friend and a peacemaker even on your job.
How often do you complete a goal or a project with no help from others? My guess is that rarely if ever do we reach our goals on our own. We receive help and cooperation, ideas and support from others, and that makes it possible for us to succeed.
One of the basic things to remember is to share credit for accomplishments and ideas.
Have you ever seen someone who won a very coveted award, accomplished something truly outstanding, and as they were recognized, the first thing they said was, “I could never have done this without. . .” and then they started to name others who had contributed to their success. Well, you may never have an Academy Award moment, but there are so many other small moments in your day where you can share the credit and acknowledge the contribution that someone else has made.
Do you ever thank your boss for helping you? Have you taken time to send an email to a coworker who went out of his or her way to give you some advice or share some ideas with you? I think we often just overlook these little things; we get too busy or we simply don’t realize how powerful “thank you” is. Recently I received a text from a friend saying simply, ”Mary I wouldn’t be here without you and all those years of helping to mentor me over the radio!” And she expressed her love. Those kinds of extra-mile expressions will go a long way to improving relationships.
One of the things we try to do well here at The Christian Working Woman is to say “thanks.” So many people have partnered with us through the many years of this ministry, and I am very aware that we could never have made it without them—without you! I know that when people support us, they do it out of love for the Lord, but that doesn’t mean they don’t want to know that we are grateful, and we appreciate their support.
Proverbs 25:11 (ESV) says that “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.” A fitly spoken word is “thanks” and it is beautiful. Believe me when I tell you—“thank you” is powerful and you can’t overdo it. Are you intentional about recognizing and thanking those you work with and for? It will go a long way toward improving your work relationships. Give it a try.
Would you really like to have better relationships on your job? I’m talking about what you can do—as one person—to improve the atmosphere where you work.
We hear lots of comments about how difficult workplaces are these days. You may feel as though you are trapped in a job you don’t like and you have no hope of escaping because jobs are scarce or you have too much time invested, or whatever. I want to challenge you to try to improve the place you’re in. As a Christian, a true follower of Jesus Christ, your first priority is to represent Christ well where you work, regardless of the circumstances.
I’ve made two suggestions for working well with others. Here’s number three: Never ambush your coworkers or boss. For example, if you bring up a problem in a meeting and it’s the first time your boss or the people involved have heard about it, then you have blindsided them and they may well interpret that to mean you’re trying to make them look bad. Always discuss issues first with the people directly involved.
Not only will that prevent you from appearing to ambush them, but you’re likely to learn something that will give you a different perspective of the situation. Proverbs 18:17 (ESV) says, “The one who states his case first seems right, until the other comes and examines him.” We’ve all witnessed times when someone forcefully presented their case, expressed their opinion, pointed their fingers, and then when the facts were fully revealed, they were made to look foolish.
In order to have really good working relationships, your coworkers and management must trust you. Trust is built over time, and the little things you do—or don’t do—on a daily basis will create a firm belief in the minds of your coworkers as to whether or not they can trust you. Are there not some people on your job that you simply don’t trust? Well, that should never be the perception our coworkers have of us, if we are disciples of Jesus Christ.
It was said of Daniel that his coworkers “could find no corruption in him, because he was trustworthy and neither corrupt nor negligent” (Daniel 6:4b). A distinguishing mark of a Christian in a secular workplace should be that we never ambush others, and we are very trustworthy.
What can you do to make your workplace a nicer, friendlier place to work? I’m talking about working well at work—going the extra mile if necessary in order to create a better relationship with coworkers and management. I talked about the importance of not playing the blame game. Here’s suggestion number two:
Always bring a solution when you present a problem. Anybody can complain and find fault, and there’s plenty of that going on in most work environments. But the person who brings a solution to a problem is very valuable. So, before you go into gripe mode, ask yourself, If I were in charge, what would I do to resolve this situation?
Early in my career in sales with IBM, I remember my manager telling me, “We don’t have problems at IBM, Mary, we have opportunities.” Now, that may sound kind of corny, but truly if everyone approached a problem as an opportunity, it would eliminate most of the negative chatter and complaining that is prevalent in far-too-many workplaces.
What would you identify as the number one problem where you work? What is the one thing you would really love to change, that you feel would truly make your working environment better? Maybe it would be something that would increase efficiency or productivity, or something that would eliminate a headache or a frustration. Identify that one thing, and then come up with a solution.
If you can’t come up with a solution, then you certainly have no right to complain about it, do you? Maybe you’re thinking that no one would take your suggestion. But have you tried? And have you presented your idea in a constructive way? Many people predict failure before they even try, and of course, those become self-fulfilling prophecies.
Proverbs 16:21 says, “The wise in heart are called discerning, and gracious words promote instruction.” When you present your solution to a problem, be very discerning about how you say it and make your words pleasant. That will help the other person to hear and to give credibility to your suggestion.
But please also be aware that sometimes a problem is far more involved than you may know, and there may be extenuating circumstances of which you have no knowledge.
A recent study showed that if you have a good friend at work, you are much more likely to be satisfied with your job. How would you describe your work relationships? Do you just tolerate those coworkers, or would you count at least some of them as good friends? Your answer to those questions could have a lot to do with how you feel about your job.
I want to talk about what you can do to work well with others, to make those working relationships more pleasant, indeed to form some close friendships where you work. Often the workplace brings out the worst in people, but as ambassadors for Jesus Christ, the workplace is our opportunity to shine as lights in a dark place, and even to change the atmosphere by learning how to work well with others. One person can make a difference, you know, so why shouldn’t that one person be you?
Here is suggestion number one for working well with others at work: Don’t play the blame game. Shifting the blame for any situation is a big no-no. I’m not suggesting you take blame for something that was not your responsibility, but don’t alienate coworkers by pointing fingers, especially in a meeting or where multiple people are present.
The biblical principle for solving issues between two people is very straight-forward: “If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses” (Matthew 18:15-16).
Often problems must be addressed and those responsible must be identified and corrected. But the way you go about this will make all the difference in whether or not you truly help someone to correct a problem or just make a problem worse. It’s really smart to always confront privately, one-on-one, after you have had time to think it through, form your words, control your anger, and make sure you’re speaking truth in love—meaning you’re doing this for the good of the other person, not just to ventilate your frustration. You definitely could win a person over this way.
And then remember, pick your fights. There are some hills that simply aren’t worth dying on, so be willing to let some things go.
We continue in the book of Ruth, where you notice that the consequences of Elimelech’s poor decision spilled over to his wife and his sons, who suffered greatly because they were in Moab instead of in Bethlehem, the Promised Land. When we decide to go out on our own and “do our own thing,” the consequences will spill over to others. You may be living with consequences of decisions made by others that spilled over to your life and caused you harm.
So, what can you do to make sure that the destiny decisions you make in the future are good ones, part of God’s plan for your life? Here are some suggestions:
Make good daily decisions.
Don’t overlook the importance of what we might call “small choices, minor decisions.” Those choices we consider small add up, and they impact our lives more than we would think.
For example, we choose each day whether we will spend quality time in God’s Word, in prayer, and in spiritual disciplines, like memorizing Scripture. If you make the wrong choice to skip that time one day, it may not have any serious short-term consequences. But if you keep making that small wrong choice day after day, it will soon add up to a choice with significant negative consequences in your life.
Your everyday life is made up of little choices:
- Do I buy those shoes, even though they are not in my budget?
- Do I skip church today because I’m a little tired?
- Do I take time to call a friend who is hurting?
- Do I share my faith with a co-worker when I have an opportunity?
- Do I eat that chocolate cheesecake which I don’t need?
Now, one day of poor choices may not take you down the wrong road, but repeated days of poor everyday choices will affect your health, your finances, your spiritual growth—you name it. Making good decisions at these daily crossroads of life requires discipline. In Proverbs 5 we see the lament of a person who refused discipline.
At the end of your life you will groan, when your flesh and body are spent. You will say, “How I hated discipline! How my heart spurned correction!” (Proverbs 5:11-12).
Your everyday decisions that may look small one at a time can add up to be quite momentous.
Choose carefully the people who influence your life.
Proverbs 13:20: Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.
You may choose to allow a relationship to begin in your life, which you know will not be good for you, but you think it’s no big deal and you can handle it. However, that small choice opens the door for that relationship to develop and it could eventually drag you down and cause you lots of heartache.
Take time to “stand at the crossroads and look.”
When you’re facing a destiny decision, remember this passage from Jeremiah 6:16:
This is what the Lord says: “Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls.”
Every time you’re faced with a choice, if you could see the end from the beginning, you would make much better choices. Often the reason we miss the right way is because we don’t stand at the crossroads and look.
Instead, we go with our emotions, with our feelings, with our gut, with our momentary desires. How many Christians have stood at that marriage crossroads and made a choice to marry a person who was not God’s choice? They didn’t ask what this marriage would be like down the road.
I was talking recently with a young woman who married a Muslim man, even though she is a Christian. He is a good man, but she knows it was not the right choice. I asked her why she made that choice, and she said, “I was blinded by being in love.” She didn’t stand at that crossroad and look for the ancient path, the good way.
You must stand at the crossroads and look and ask God for an eternal perspective—what will this look like in eternity? That will prevent you from making some of those poor choices that you would later regret.
Ask for the “Ancient Paths.”
Jeremiah says we are to ask for the ancient paths. Ancient paths? You mean, do it the old-fashioned way? You mean, do what my mother says I should do? You mean, make choices that aren’t cool? In our modern world, ancient paths are not highly respected or desired. Outdated and narrow would be the words many would use to describe these ancient paths. Why would you want to choose ancient paths?
Because the ancient paths are God’s paths. He is the eternal God, the Ancient of Days he is called, and his paths are from ancient. They don’t change because they don’t need to change. They are true and good for all time. They are the paths that have proven to be the good paths.
So, ask for the ancient paths. I mean, literally pray, “God, show me the ancient path as I face this crossroads. Show me your way.”
Proverbs 6:20 -22: My son, keep your father’s command and do not forsake your mother’s teaching. Bind them always on your heart; fasten them around your neck. When you walk, they will guide you; when you sleep, they will watch over you; when you awake, they will speak to you.
Isaiah 30:21: Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, “This is the way; walk in it.”
Seek godly advice.
Sometimes you need to ask for directions from godly counselors. Proverbs 15:22 says, “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.” Don’t be too proud to ask for guidance from godly people who might have a better perspective than yours.
Jeremiah’s exhortation to us is to seek the ancient path and the good way, and then walk in it. Just do it. Obey. I’m often saddened when I talk with people who are at some crossroad in their lives, and they seem to want to know what the good way is. But then I discover that they only want to know the good way if it is easy, or if it suits them, or if it is the way they want to go.
Return to the Place of Blessing
Getting back to our story of Elimelech, after he and his two sons died there in Moab, Naomi and her daughter-in-law, Ruth returned to the ancient paths—back to the Promised Land. Ruth made a destiny decision—she chose a new time and a new place for herself, but her choice was not one of desperation or frustration. She chose to go with Naomi out of obedience to what she knew to be the right thing for a daughter-in-law to do.
She stood at the crossroads and chose the ancient path, as difficult as it must have looked. Many would have said it was a foolish choice. But she determined to follow the God of Naomi, and to remain true to her mother-in-law. She could never have dreamed, in her wildest imagination, what would result from her choice.
She had to go and live in a foreign land; she had to glean the fields for food. This was not the life Ruth had planned for herself as a young girl, but God took her to a new place and gave her a new identity. Even though Elimelech made a poor decision to take his family to Moab, God used even that poor choice to bring good to Ruth—and to her son, Obed, the father of Jesse, who was the father of King David. She became the great-grandmother of King David.
So, the lessons we learn from this are to truly seek God’s guidance for all our decisions, and most importantly, for destiny decisions. But even if you are now living with the consequences of some poor or wrong destiny decisions you have made—or perhaps others have made which have affected you—God is so great and so gracious that he is able to bring you back to the place of blessing and give you a new time and a new place to serve him and find joy and contentment. You can never mess up so badly that God can’t redeem your life. God’s grace is much deeper than your sins and mine, and that is the really good news today.
I’ve been focusing on the importance of the choices we make—our every day choices about small things and the larger ones that make a difference in the direction of our lives. This passage from Jeremiah gives some good advice about making choices:
This is what the Lord says: “Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls. But you said, ‘We will not walk in it’” (Jeremiah 6:16).
Jeremiah is warning us against making decisions too quickly and making them without seeking God’s guidance. He says stand and look; think of what this decision will look like down the road. Don’t be deceived by the momentary glamor or attractiveness of this choice; what is it going to look like in a week, a month, a year—eternity? Then he advises us to look for the good way, the ancient path. That means take time to pray about it, seek godly advice if needed, ask God where the good way is. Often it’s not the way you may be intending to go.
Interesting that in that day the people refused to choose the good way. They just said, “Nope, not going to go that way. I’m going my own way.” I can think of choices I’ve made where, in a real sense, I said the same thing—going to do it my way. And without exception, those choices were harmful; I didn’t find rest for my soul
Could that be where you are at this point in your life? You’re facing a decision—a choice—and you just want what you want and you want it now, so you’re not asking for the good way, the ancient path that will lead you to soul rest. If so, I strongly urge you to stand at this crossroad in your life—this decision you are facing—and seek God’s way and then walk in it. You’ll never regret that choice.
Or maybe you’re living with the consequences of choosing your way instead of God’s way. Let me encourage you to know that God hasn’t given up on you. He always has a plan to prosper you and help you, taking you where you are, even as you are living with those consequences, and making a way for you that leads to soul rest, to a renewed relationship with God through Jesus. It’s never too late to stand at the crossroads and choose the good way, the ancient path.
Have you noticed that the Bible doesn’t spare telling us the whole story? We can learn from some of the people in the Bible who made some dreadful choices.
David comes to mind, this man after God’s own heart. But his choice to call for Bathsheba, commit adultery, have her husband killed—all of those sordid details are in the Bible. I wonder how often David thought about the consequences of that terribly bad choice he made. He paid a very heavy price personally for that choice, and yet God still loved him and used him.
On the other hand, think of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego—those three young Jewish men taken captive to Babylon. They were commanded to worship the pagan statue that King Nebuchadnezzar made or be thrown in the fiery furnace. They had a choice to make. I love how they responded to the King:
“King Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to deliver us from it, and he will deliver us from Your Majesty’s hand. But even if he does not, we want you to know, Your Majesty, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up” (Daniel 3:16b-18).
Just as these men chose to take that strong stand for their God, it’s possible that you will have to face some similar choices. You may be facing some fiery furnaces even now: instructions from your company that are not compatible with your faith; disrespect from family members or friends who condemn you for not going along with the culture; rejection from people who think you are weird because you stand strong for your biblical convictions. Will you choose, as these three men did, that you will not serve other gods? You will not give in to the pressure to abandon your beliefs, knowing as they did that you may indeed have to live with the consequences of your choice? Are you determined by God’s grace to take the “even if he does not” stand for Jesus?
This passage from Proverbs 8 gives some good advice about making choices:
Proverbs 8:10 – 11
Choose my instruction instead of silver, knowledge rather than choice gold, for wisdom is more precious than rubies, and nothing you desire can compare with her.
Choosing the instruction of wisdom over riches is both biblical and smart. According to this proverb, nothing you desire can compare with acquiring wisdom. Are you focused and intentional about learning to be wise? And how do you choose the instruction of wisdom?
Well, another proverb says, “Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm” (Proverbs 13:20). So, you choose to closely associate with wise people; you are careful who you allow to influence you, who you listen to. As Christ-followers, we don’t isolate ourselves from the world, but it is extremely important who we “walk with,” making sure our instructors are biblically wise.
Another proverb says, “For the Lord gives wisdom; from his mouth come knowledge and understanding” (Proverbs 2:6). And, of course, God’s wisdom—the words from his mouth—are given to us in the Scriptures and through prayer. In fact, James writes: “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you” (James 1:5).
Have you ever taken that promise seriously? I remember some years ago when I had to make a rather quick decision about an important matter, and afterwards I remember thinking, Wow, can’t believe I made such a good decision. Then the Holy Spirit quietly reminded me that I had been consistently praying for wisdom and God answered my prayers. The Lord gave me wisdom—and continues to when I intentionally look for wisdom in his word and pray for wisdom.
Becoming wise is a choice you make. It takes some discipline and effort, but it is one of the smartest disciplines you will ever incorporate into your life. Choosing wisdom keeps you from much regret and heartache.
Can you think of some choices you’ve made—maybe even recently—that you would like to do-over? Choices have consequences, that’s for sure, so I want to remind you of some biblical principles about choices.
This one from Joshua is no doubt the most important choice we make:
“But if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your ancestors served beyond the Euphrates, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord” (Joshua 24:15).
Joshua puts it to the people of Israel that they have a choice as to who they will serve, the Lord God or some false pagan god. That was a default choice. If they don’t choose to serve the Lord God, they will by default serve a false god. One or the other.
We have default choices, too. Failing to make one choice means you are choosing another choice by default. If you have made a choice to be a Christ-follower, to serve the Lord, then that means you are choosing not to serve other gods, gods of your own making, gods of our culture. Jesus made it clear that we cannot serve God and money—or other things that can crawl up on the throne of our heart.
Joshua began by saying “if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you” because sometimes it may seem “undesirable”—not easy. For example, serving the Lord on your job could require taking a stand that isn’t politically correct, which could have unpleasant consequences for you and your career. So, you have to decide in advance that serving the Lord is desirable—is your choice. Joshua took that stand—”we will serve the Lord,” he said.
In our culture today, I believe we as Christ-followers will need to decide in advance—make a determination and commitment in our minds and hearts—that we choose to serve the Lord. We choose to stand true to God’s Word. That is the most important choice you and I will ever make. Like Joshua, we should make that a firm decision in our minds, and a choice we reinforce and re-commit regularly. Can you say, “I choose to serve the Lord—no matter what”?
How many choices do you think you make in a normal day? You probably would never guess 35,000 choices a day, but various sources estimate that an adult makes 35,000 remotely conscious decisions each day. This sounds a bit absurd to me and I’m guessing it does to you as well, but when you think about all the choices you consciously and subconsciously make, you realize it’s a lot more than you might guess.
You have been given a free-will to make a multitude of choices in life about:
- what to eat
- what to wear
- what to purchase
- what you believe
- what jobs and career choices you will pursue
- who to spend your time with
- who you will date and marry
- what you say and how you say it
Not to mention all the choices you make for others—as a parent or a manager or a spouse! The list could go on and on, and each choice carries its own consequences—some good, some bad, some neutral. This ability to choose is an incredible power that we have each been given by God and our challenge as Christ-followers is to be sure we are choosing according to biblical principles.
Our choices pile up on each other over our lifetime, and if you get into the habit of making poor choices, that can take you to outcomes you really don’t want. But the good news is, you can establish good habits of making good choices and that means your life can go in a much better direction.
Some things to consider about your approach to making choices:
- Watch out for impulsive choices. They are often based on emotions or lack of adequate information and end up not so good.
- Watch out for procrastination—putting off choices that need to be made now. Procrastination is a deadly bad habit that needs to be purged and forsaken.
- Watch out for making choices to please other people, or choices just because they are popular. Those choices are often not in agreement with biblical principles.
Your approach to how you make choices—big and small—is the first important thing to consider because a good approach will lead to good outcomes.
I want to point out what the Bible teaches us about making choices, and we’ll look at some people in the Bible who make really good choices and others who didn’t. It seems like a good thing to consider as we begin this New Year.
What are destiny decisions?
Destiny decisions are those decisions we have made or we are yet to make which changed or will change our destinies. They are choices and decisions we make that take us to a different destiny, and most often we don’t even recognize how impactful that destiny decision was until we look back in retrospect.
No doubt you can think of some “destiny decisions” you’ve made in your life that, in retrospect, you see that they changed the destiny of your life. And no doubt you’d like to do some of those decisions over!
New beginnings has an appeal for us, does it not? Just the idea of starting all over again, making better choices, taking a different path, avoiding the mistakes we made, wiping out the past. It just sounds good.
Or maybe we’d just like something new and exciting in our lives. Something to liven things up and put a little “jazz” in our lives.
During the restless years of my life, when I was wandering far from God, I was always looking for something new to perk me up. My first choice was a man, but if no man was around, then some new clothes or a new adventure—go somewhere for fun. I changed jobs three times because I was restless and was looking for something new to make life more interesting, more exciting.
I remember that Saturday nights were particularly difficult for me. I never wanted to sit home on a Saturday night. I mean, if you were sitting home alone on a Saturday night, something must be wrong with you—that’s what I thought. So I always made plans for Saturday night, looking for something or someone who would fill my life with interest or excitement.
Sometimes people look for changes in their lives to get out of a bad situation. They’re in a job they don’t like, so they look for a new one. They’re married to a person who doesn’t suit them, so they have affairs or get divorced. How many people do you know who have made terrible decisions because they simply wanted to get out of a bad situation?
True, sometimes we need to get out of some situations we’re in, but if we move in haste or without God’s guidance, then we can make the wrong decision and choose the wrong road.
The Bible tells us of people who made poor destiny decisions. People like Eve and Esau, Sarah and Judas.
Case Study: Elimelech
There is another story in the Bible of a man who was looking for a change. His name was Elimelech, and he was a citizen of Bethlehem, somewhere between 1200 and 1300 B.C., in one of the most tumultuous times in Israel’s long, troubled history.
Ruth 1:1 – 2: In the days when the judges ruled, there was a famine in the land. So a man from Bethlehem in Judah, together with his wife and two sons, went to live for a while in the country of Moab.The man’s name was Elimelek, his wife’s name was Naomi, and the names of his two sons were Mahlon and Kilion. They were Ephrathites from Bethlehem, Judah. And they went to Moab and lived there.
Elimelech made a destiny decision: He took his wife, Naomi, and their two sons, and moved from Israel to Moab, a neighboring nation. I’m sure he must have given it much thought and decided that a geographical change was exactly what they needed in order to survive. He had what would appear to be a good reason. There was a great famine in his land and he was having difficulty feeding his family.
It would seem a good plan to human logic. Yet when Elimelech left the borders of the Promised Land, he left the protection and provision God had promised to his people.
On Our Own Terms
What Elimelech did is one of those things we are all sometimes inclined to do under the stress of circumstances; we are tempted to step outside of God’s promise and seek solutions to our problems on our own terms. The Bible says, “There is a way that appears to be right, but in the end it leads to death.” (Proverbs 14:12). It looked right to Elimelech—going to this new place—but it brought him and his two sons actual death. They died there in Moab.
In our own lives, you and I may never face literal famines, but our “hungers” encompass more than food. We hunger in different ways. For example:
- We hunger for acceptance.
- We hunger for vocational fulfillment.
- We hunger for recognition and success.
- We hunger for sufficiency and adequacy.
- We hunger for love.
- We hunger for marriage and children.
- We hunger for financial stability and success.
And these hungers can lead us to make changes that simply make things worse. We try to satisfy these inner needs by going to some new place, or doing some new thing, or finding some new person, and it just doesn’t work. True, sometimes God’s plan for our lives takes us to a new place, but when we are frantically trying to fulfill our dreams and desires by our own manipulative means, we’re making things worse.
We set ourselves up for great disappointment and defeat because we expect to find our needs met by some new circumstance or some new person, asking of them what they can never deliver. Only the Lord can bring about true change and genuine fulfillment, and he does it from the inside out.
Nevertheless. . . there is an Elimelech alive in all of us; looking for a new time and a new place, on our own terms. You’ve heard it said in words like these:
“My spouse isn’t fulfilling my emotional needs, so I deserve–no, need!–those secret fantasies, that pornography or that adulterous affair.”
“It’s obvious I’m not going to find a Christian man to marry. Look how long I’ve waited. So, I’m going to take whatever looks good to me. It’ll work out in time!”
“I’ll never get ahead in this job by living by the rules. Nobody else does. If I have to cut a few corners to climb the ladder, so be it.”
“I know this movie contains a lot of explicit sex and illicit relationships. But hey, this is life the way it is now; you can’t watch a movie that doesn’t. And besides, I need a little excitement in my life, even if it’s vicarious.”
“I deserve some new clothes, a new car, a better place to live. I’ll pay these debts off somehow, some time.”
We sell ourselves on our need to make things happen—and many times we are living in self-deceptions. I mean, we really believe we have to take control and make things happen in our lives—so we move to our Moab to avoid the famine in our lives.
Consequences
We all have free choice to make these kinds of decisions, but we can’t choose the consequences that result. Elimelech paid an incredibly high price for trying to solve his problem in his way.
Ruth 1:3-5: Now Elimelek, Naomi’s husband, died, and she was left with her two sons. They married Moabite women, one named Orpah and the other Ruth. After they had lived there about ten years, both Mahlon and Kilion also died, and Naomi was left without her two sons and her husband.
Elimelech chased a rainbow and lost an inheritance. He took his family with him, and they lost everything too—including him. He had left the boundaries of God’s Promised Land and protection and found death. The passing of these men was not an act of an angry God, but simply a commentary on what happens outside the boundaries of God’s plan.
Jesus, who calls us into life, calls us within specific boundaries. He may have a new time and a new place for us, but only on his terms, not ours. When we step outside the boundaries of his covenant, of his terms as given in his word, we will suffer the consequences and fail to find what we are so desperately looking for.
I complete this series on words of wisdom for the workplace with:
We should always strive to bring out the best in others, not the worst.
Often we can bring out the best in others by giving deserved compliments or recognition—focusing on the positive in them rather than the negative. So often others will improve their performance or their attitude if someone just gives them a little recognition or praise. You can bring out the best in others by commending them when you can.
In Proverbs 15:30 we see that a cheerful look brings joy to the heart. You can bring out the best in others by something as simple as a smile.
Proverbs 12:18 says, “…reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.” And Proverbs 15:1a tells us that, “A gentle answer turns away wrath.” It’s easy to see that the words we speak can either bring out the worst or the best in people.
If you respond to someone with sharp and uncaring words, in a rushed or hasty manner, it can easily cause them to respond in a poor way. But by choosing your words carefully, it’s amazing how you can change that other person and bring out the best in them.
When you’re dealing with someone who is angry or upset, your goal should be to bring out the best in that person. You can do that by being empathetic and sympathetic: “I’m so sorry you’ve had a problem.” Or “I can certainly understand how you feel.” You can help to calm someone down by controlling the tone of your voice, keeping it calm and kind. You can bring out the best in an angry person sometimes by simply listening and caring about the problem. Those are little things that bring out the best in people.
Don’t you think we could impact our worlds for Jesus Christ if we more and more became people who bring out the best in others? Ask God to make you that kind of Christian.
Change is the one thing you can always count on, they say. And yet change is one of the most difficult things for us to accept. I’ve been giving you words of wisdom for the workplace, daily nuggets from God’s Word to remind you of his principles as you face various situations at work.
And one of those situations is change! A. W. Tozer wrote: “We rest in Thee without fear or doubt and face our tomorrows without anxiety.” Do you face your tomorrows without fear or anxiety? I find that the great majority of us live in fear of change: What will I do if this happens? What will happen to me if that happens? Where will I go if this doesn’t work out? Who will be there for me if he or she leaves me? How can I learn to cope with these changes in my lifestyle or my job routine?
One of the greatest attributes of our Mighty God is that he never changes. Change happens when things improve or when they decay. But God has no need for improvement, and he cannot be less that what he is already. Therefore, he has no need of change and he’s promised us that he never will. Oh, what comfort and peace this should bring to our hearts, as we live in this world where change is the only thing you can count on.
It was when I was facing a very uncertain future, with many changes ahead, that I learned the joy and comfort of trusting in a God who never changes. My first reaction was to go into panic mode, but after spending time with God, I started clinging to the promise that he will never change. As I have faced more changes in my life, I am more confident than ever before that my days are written in God’s book and nothing is out of control. One thing that can never change is God’s love and his presence in your life, and as long as you can be certain of that, you can accept the other changes you may face.
Dear friend, if you’re facing some changes today, some unknown paths ahead of you, be confident of this: Your God will never change, and he has promised never to leave you or forsake you. Constantly remind yourself that he’s the same yesterday, today and forever. Whatever changes come your way, they cannot destroy you because he is your refuge and strength, and that will always be true no matter what happens.
The good word for the workplace today is: Learn to stay positive even in a negative environment.
You know, many times you can go to work feeling really positive and up, but you leave in a negative, complaining mood. What are the things in your working world that cause you to have a bad attitude?
It can be co-workers or management who irritate you, who cause you unnecessary problems, who don’t do their share of the work, or who are very negative people themselves. Most of us have some of those people in our life.
Or perhaps there are times when you have an impossible amount of work to accomplish, or difficult deadlines or pressures, or unrealistic expectations, and that certainly can bring you into negative territory. Perhaps it’s your environment: The temperature is not right, or it’s drab and dreary, or noisy and hectic. Whatever these things are which tend to make you negative rather than positive, you need to identify them.
Then, look at those things and ask yourselves three questions:
- Can I confront this situation and try to change it? I find that most people gripe and complain without making the first effort to find a solution. They give up without trying. I don’t think you have grounds for complaint unless you’ve at least tried to find a solution.
- Is there some way I can compensate for this situation? For example, if you have a dreary office, how can you perk it up? Maybe plants and posters will help.
- Ask yourself what goes with your territory. Every job, every industry, every profession has certain aspects which simply go with the territory, and those you must learn to accept without allowing them to bring you down.
Think about the things that make you negative and ask God to give you the grace and wisdom to rise above them and be the positive person you need to be for his glory.
What’s the good word today? That’s a cliché we sometimes use. Well, I have good words for you, words of wisdom for the workplace, right from God’s Word. So, here’s our word of wisdom for today:
Learn to overlook insults or hurtful words.
Have you ever been insulted? It’s not much fun, is it? Not too long ago, I discovered that someone had insulted me, and I struggled with it quite a bit. But God showed me some good lessons out of his Word about how to handle an insult, and I’d like to share that with you today.
I was upset about that insult; it had hurt and I wanted to retaliate. I wanted to let that person know they had hurt me. I wanted to make them feel badly about it. Can you identify with those reactions? Then I read Proverbs 12:16, which says “Fools show their annoyance at once, but the prudent overlook an insult.”
I knew God wanted me to overlook that insult. But I thought, “That’s not fair. They shouldn’t be allowed to get away with it.” But I couldn’t deny the clear word from God to overlook that insult. That was the first thing I learned about handling an insult.
Secondly, I had to get it out of my mind, because I found I was thinking of it continually, and it was keeping me from getting anything done, it was keeping me upset, it was doing me harm. So, I had to attack the thought patterns and bring them back in line.
Then I asked God to show me what I could learn from this insult, and amazingly, there was a number of good lessons for me that God made clear through his Word.
So, if you’ve been insulted lately, I recommend this procedure to you. Number one, overlook it. Act as though it never happened. Number two, push it out of your mind every time it starts to come back in. And number three, ask God to teach you a specific lesson from the experience. Then, the whole unpleasant episode will not have been fruitless. You will have grown and learned through it.
I want to give you some words of wisdom for the workplace. First words of wisdom: Talk to yourself in encouraging words, not negative ones.
In Psalm 41 and 42 you will notice this phrase is often repeated: “Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.” Evidently the writer was struggling with depression, with discouragement, with the blahs, just like you and I struggle from time to time. And he talked to himself as a way to speak the right words into his mind and turn around his wrong thinking.
In verse 6 of Psalm 42, we read, “My soul is downcast within me; therefore I will remember you…” Now this is a very good technique and habit for all of us to learn. When you feel down, you should then force yourself to remember and recite out loud God’s goodness to you in times past.
Are you having a tough time today? Then, stop right now and talk to yourself; find some place where you can say something like, “Look, Mary, what is your problem? The God of all the Universe loves you and cares for you, he has met your need time and again.”
I noticed in Psalm 42 and 43 that the writer also verbalized his doubts. “Why have you forgotten me. Why have you rejected me?” He voiced those doubts and questions out loud to God, but immediately he came back to the truth of praising God and hoping in God.
When I find myself doubting and questioning God, I try to voice those to him out loud. “Lord, I feel as though you’re not there. BUT I know better Lord. THEREFORE, I trust you, I place my hope in you. You are my Savior and my God.”
So, talk to yourself. I believe it’s a Scriptural principle we need to incorporate into our lives to help us find victory in those everyday ups and downs of life.
Ephesians 5:15-16 says, “Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise,making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil.” One translation says, “redeeming the time because the days are evil.” So, on this last day of 2022, I want to talk about “redeeming the time.”
First, I want to tell you what I am not going to talk about:
- New Year’s Resolutions – I promise, I will not even mention them again because we all know that generally we don’t do so good by them, do we? They come and go pretty quickly, so I won’t even talk about them.
- Setting New Year Goals – Not going to talk about goals for the New Year. Oh, it’s not that we don’t need goals to keep us on track, but that’s not what I’m talking about today.
- Going on a Diet – I promise, I won’t mention it again!
- Turning Over a New Leaf – not today. Won’t talk about that today.
Just going to remind you that none of us has unlimited time left on this earth. Our days are numbered, only God knows the number, but there is a number and as people often say—when your number is up, your time on earth will be up. So, we need to think about what it means to redeem your time because as Christ-followers, we will be held accountable for the use of our time.
Does that mean we should work all the time, chalk up lots of hours doing things, make sure we punch our imaginary time clocks and try to impress God and everyone else that we are busy? I don’t think so. But what does it mean to “redeem the time”?
Well, when you redeem something, you buy it back so you regain possession of it. So, to me, redeeming time means taking stock of where I’m wasting time and getting it back. It is recognizing that you and I have been given a gift of time from God, and God wants us to live in continual awareness that our time is passing—and passing quickly—and it will be gone and wasted if we don’t redeem it—make the most of it.
Jesus said this to his disciples: “We must work the works of him who sent me while it is day; night is coming, when no one can work” (John 9:4 ESV). He certainly was aware that his time on earth was limited and he wanted to be sure that he redeemed that time by doing the works that God his Father sent him to do. He was the best at making the most of every opportunity.
And you know, that meant he had to say “no” sometimes. He chose to take on human flesh and limit himself to a body like ours, so he had to make choices about the way he spent his time while here on earth. Remember the time he told a man that he could not arbitrate an argument he was having with his brother? He said he was not sent to do that, so he didn’t. That’s redeeming the time. The disciples at one time had a crowd waiting in one town, expecting him to come speak to them and heal them as he had been doing, but he simply told them that it was his job to go to other towns. He said “no.”
Are you good at saying no? I must admit that I am not. And that can keep you from making the best use of your time because none of us can do everything we might like or want to do. Redeeming the time is making better and better choices of how you spend your time.
Someone said that we don’t drift toward righteousness. When you drift in a boat, for example, you just let the boat go wherever the water takes it. No directing the boat in the right direction, but just letting it drift. That’s easier than rowing the boat, fighting the waves, trimming the sails, but it won’t get you anywhere.
When you drift in your spiritual life, that’s when you just let life and its circumstances take you where they will. You don’t do the intentional and sometimes hard work of staying alert, being disciplined, steering your life in the direction it should go. So, you drift away from righteousness, not toward it.
Sadly, I think that’s the plight of many Christ-followers. They never intended to fall away from their commitment to Christ, but they just started drifting, letting things go, taking it easy, not doing the things they used to do, and they wake up and discover they’ve drifted a long way in the wrong way. They find themselves doing things and going places they wouldn’t have thought of a few months or years ago, but they started drifting.
Dr. D.A. Carson wrote this about spiritual drifting:
People do not drift toward Holiness. Apart from grace-driven effort, people do not gravitate toward godliness, prayer, obedience to Scripture, faith, and delight in the Lord. We drift toward compromise and call it tolerance; we drift toward disobedience and call it freedom; we drift toward superstition and call it faith. We cherish the indiscipline of lost self-control and call it relaxation; we slouch toward prayerlessness and delude ourselves into thinking we have escaped legalism; we slide toward godlessness and convince ourselves we have been liberated.
Does that ring any bells with you? You see, drifting is usually very gradual and slow so that you hardly recognize it until you’ve drifted a long way. So, if you find that you’ve been drifting lately, ask yourself how much time you’ve lost, how much you’ve wasted while you were drifting. And think of where you might be now if instead of drifting, you had purposely set your sails to grow in your faith, in the grace and knowledge of Jesus Christ.
I promised no resolutions or goals in this message, but here’s what I also promise. I promise that if you start this new year with a desire to stop drifting and start guiding your spiritual journey in the way it should go—to redeem your time—then 2023 is going to be an exciting year for you. We never drift toward righteousness, but thanks to God’s Holy Spirit living within us as believers, we have the power we need to live holy and righteous lives, and that is where the fulfillment and contentment and excitement happens.
2 Peter 1:3: “His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness.”
Because of the divine power of our Lord, we have been given what it takes to stop drifting away from the abundant life that Jesus promised us and move in the right direction toward a godly life. A life not only pleasing to God, but equally pleasing and fulfilling for us. It’s the narrow road that leads to life.
Here are some practical steps that I have found helpful in this challenge of redeeming my time.
First, choose one word that you will focus on all year, a word to help you remember what God wants to do in your life, a word to help you make some needed changes or grow in some area. For example, over the years I’ve chosen several, including thankfulness. That’s always a good one word for the year, because being thankful is truly a key element in spiritual maturity and growth. I’ve chosen gentleness and kindness, patience—all areas where I knew I needed to grow. This year my one word is acceptance as I want to be contented where I am and not indulge in regret or discouragement of any kind. I find a verse that reinforces my one word each year and put reminders around me so I don’t forget. For this year, my verse is 1 Timothy 6:6: “But godliness with contentment is great gain.”
Secondly, decide that you will be intentional about encouraging someone every day. I have learned to put that on my daily to-do list: Who will you encourage today? It’s usually something very small—a call, an email, sometimes a card or a small gift. Doesn’t take much time, I just have to remember to do it. And it’s interesting how God will bring people to my mind that I would not have thought even needed encouragement, but I try to encourage them anyway. I want to do that better this year.
Third, have a plan for how you read your Bible every day. There are any number of ways to do it, but if you don’t have a plan, my guess is your Bible reading is often hit and miss, and you keep reading the same things when you do read. Maybe you read a Psalm every day—that’s great, but it’s not enough. You need a balanced diet of the entire Word of God—I promise it makes a difference when you have a daily plan for reading your Bible. You can find several Bible reading plans online that will help guide you.
And the last suggestion I have is to find yourself a prayer partner if you don’t have one already. Make a plan to pray regularly with someone you trust, someone you know is not “drifting” but rather desires to be all God wants her or him to be. Someone who might hold you accountable. Maybe once a week or whatever—just get together and pray for each other. I think of a friend who years ago was facing a daunting new job, one that had daily challenges, so she asked another friend to pray with her. Each weekday morning at 6:00am they prayed together for 15 minutes, specifically addressing the needs of the day in front of them. That continued for years, and both of them testify today that their prayer partnership transformed their lives in many ways.
So, I’ve given you four suggestions—not resolutions but suggestions of what you might do to redeem your time, to take advantage of all the opportunities God brings your way. They are:
- Choose one word as your word of transformation this year and find a verse that goes with it. Then keep it in front of you one way or another all through the year. Pray it into your life.
- Decide that you will make a strong effort to encourage one person each day. Make it a part of your daily routine.
- If you don’t have one already, put a daily plan in place for reading your Bible. No more hit-and-miss Bible reading, but rather a specific plan for reading all parts of the Bible.
- Ask God to give you a prayer partner; look for someone that will agree to praying regularly with you, set a day and time, and stick to it.
These are my suggestions to help you and me redeem our time for God’s glory. Let me repeat the verse from Ephesians 5:15-16 that we began with:
“Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise,making the most of every opportunity—redeeming the time, because the days are evil.”vvvv
This is program number 9205. For 9205 days, or over 1800 weeks, I’ve been broadcasting this daily edition of our program. These milestones cause me to stop and think about God’s goodness to allow me this privilege all these years.But milestones should also cause us to stop and measure our progress. I’ve been talking about measuring our spiritual maturity, and I can’t help but ask myself at this program marker, have I grown as a Christian over these many years, as I should have? Does Jesus say to me, “You’re big for your age, Mary,” meaning I’ve pressed on and learned and grown up in Christ? Or does he say, “You’re not where you should be after all these years”?Dear friends, it is so important that we regularly and sincerely take stock of our spiritual progress and make sure we’re doing the things we should be doing so that we are growing up in Christ, not remaining babies, not mired down in the past, not making the same mistakes we’ve always made. Here are some questions to ask yourself to measure your spiritual maturity, based on what we’ve talked about: Is your tongue more under control today than it was a year ago, two years ago? Do you think before you speak, choose your words carefully, and just simply stop talking so much? Are you motivated to serve Christ out of a pure heart, just to please him, or are you trying to please people and gain their approval? Do you love God’s Word more than you used to? Are you spending more time studying it? Is it more and more the true bread of your life? Do you ever memorize some of it? Are you allowing your past to keep you from growing up in Christ? Are you living in bitterness or regret, which keeps you from pressing forward for the good things God has for you? And most importantly, are you loving Jesus more and more with each passing day? Do you frequently and fervently thank him for what he has done for you? Does it break your heart to think that you have broken his heart through disobedience?I urge you to measure your maturity; ask God to show you where your growth is stunted, and then do the things you need to do to grow up in Christ. That is where the abundant life is; that is where you will regain the joy of your salvation and know the peace that passes understanding.
On a scale of one to ten, how would you measure your spiritual maturity? As far as I know, there are no scales for measuring spiritual maturity, but there are biblical mile-markers that can tell us if we are growing up in Christ as we should be.In Philippians 3 Paul talks about his own growing-up process, saying “Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me” (verse 12). Becoming mature in Christ is a process, and we must be intentional about pressing on. The Apostle then says, “Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me. . .” (3:13b-14).Notice that he keeps talking about pressing on, never giving up, always striving to be all that God has created him to be in Christ Jesus. I believe one of the sure signs of our spiritual maturity is whether or not we truly press on, to put our past behind us and to go for the goal—the good works God created us to do.The enemy of your soul would love to keep you mired down in your past. If he can saddle you with regrets, with bad memories, with bitterness, with anger—any or all of those—as you dwell on your past, then he knows you’ll never grow up. Whether your past is filled with your own wrong choices and their consequences, or with unfair treatment or abuse of some kind, living in the past will cripple you and your spiritual growth will be stunted.In Isaiah 43 the Lord says, “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland” (18-19). Dwelling in the past causes us to miss the new things God has for us, and we are then stuck in our wildernesses and wastelands, never growing into the fullness of what Jesus died to give us.If your past has you mired down, I pray that you will press on, and with God’s help, put that past behind you, so that you can perceive the way that God is making for you.
We often measure our growth in many areas of our lives, such as skills we’ve acquired, experience we’ve gained, education we’ve acquired, and we’re quick to update our resumes, so to speak, and let the world know how we have grown. But how often do we take time to measure our spiritual maturity and growth?The writer to the Hebrews is warning them about falling away from the faith, and he writes: “We have much to say about this, but it is hard to make it clear to you because you no longer try to understand. In fact, though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you the elementary truths of God’s word all over again. You need milk, not solid food! Anyone who lives on milk, being still an infant, is not acquainted with the teaching about righteousness. But solid food is for the mature, who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil” (5:11-14).This is a real measure of spiritual maturity—whether or not we are eating solid food or we’re still living on milk. What does that mean? It means that if you’re living on milk, you’re still a baby Christian and you’re not growing in your knowledge of God’s Word. Obviously, this is directed to those who have been Christians for a while, who ought now to be ready to teach others, but instead still need to learn the elementary truths of God’s Word.You can measure your spiritual maturity by how much you really desire to get into the Word of God, to know it at deeper and deeper levels. I think of a friend in my class at church who is so thrilled because she has the opportunity to take some college-level Bible classes and learn more. She just beams as she tells me how much she loves these classes and how she is learning so much. I have watched her grow up to maturity in Christ because she has an insatiable desire to know God’s Word, and she makes it a high priority.If your Bible is hardly ever open from one Sunday to another, if you’re not regularly involved in a Bible study of some kind, if you are still in “elementary school” when you ought to be in “college,” then you’re still a baby in Christ, and you need to grow up.As I look back over my life, the years I lived in disobedience to God’s principles were the years I almost never opened my Bible. The Bible will keep you from sin, and sin will keep you from the Bible. So, how do you measure up?
Have you ever said to someone, “Oh, grow up!”? Surely there are times when we want to take someone by the shoulder and say, “Oh, grow up!” I’m just wondering if God ever wants to say those words to me—or you.I’m talking about how we can measure our spiritual maturity. Are we growing up in Christ? The Apostle Paul addressed this issue of maturity as he wrote to various churches. In Ephesians 4 he wrote that we should all “reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ. Then we will no longer be infants. . . instead. . . we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ” (4:13 – 15).What are some measures of our maturity? I first pointed out that our words reveal our maturity. A mature Christian is one who controls her tongue. Another measure is our motivation. What is it that motivates you to serve Christ?King David gave a strong exhortation to his son, Solomon, who would take the throne after him. We read in 1 Chronicles 28:And you, my son Solomon, acknowledge the God of your father, and serve him with wholehearted devotion and with a willing mind, for the Lord searches every heart and understands every desire and every thought (verse 9a).We can put on a good front and fool others, but we can never fool God. He knows our thoughts and our motives. This is an area that I often think and pray about, because I am well aware that I rarely, if ever, have totally pure motives. I want to, but tucked way underneath, in my heart of hearts, I often have to admit to pride, wanting the praise of people, doing what I do because it makes me feel good.I have finally come to the conclusion, that this side of heaven I’m not likely to ever have completely pure motivation, but as long as I’m aware of it, praying about it, and desiring to serve God out of a pure heart, he will know and understand. And he will reveal my wrong motives and help me to grow up in this area.So, another strong measure of our spiritual maturity is our motivation—why we do what we do. Check it out.
As we close out this year of 2022, it might be helpful if we measured our faith to see how mature it is. So, I want to suggest some biblical ways you can measure your maturity and find out if you’re growing up in Christ as you’d like to be.Our bodies mature on us, whether we like it or not, but spiritual maturity is not something that just happens. We have to be intentional about growing more mature spiritually. So, if we could measure spiritual maturity, how would you measure up?We sometimes say of children “he’s big for his age,” meaning his physical statue is larger than most boys his age. Could anyone say that about your spiritual statue? Are you big for your spiritual age? Or is your growth stunted?When we recognize that our child is not as mature as he or she should be in some area, we go to a specialist and try to figure out why our child is smaller than she should be, or slower, or less active. Don’t you think we should be equally sensitive to our own spiritual maturity, and recognize areas where we need to “grow up”?One way to find out how much you’ve grown in your faith walk is to pay attention to what comes out of your mouth—to measure your words. The book of Proverbs has lots of good advice about controlling our tongues, and in chapter 17 it gives us a clear measure of our maturity:The one who has knowledge uses words with restraint, and whoever has understanding is even-tempered. Even fools are thought wise if they keep silent, and discerning if they hold their tongues (17:27-28).Measure your maturity by whether or not you are restrained in what you say. That simply means you think before you speak; you ask yourself, “How would I feel if someone said that to me?” You consider whether you need to say it or not. You remember Ephesians 4:29, which says to let nothing unwholesome come out of your mouth, and therefore you use words with restraint.This is one of the most important measures of maturity, because until we learn to control our tongues, we remain in that immature stage, we’re not where we should be, and we need to start growing up. Make it a matter of prayer and ask God to help you control your tongue.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)Are you a generous person?Proverbs 11:24-25 tells us, “One person gives freely, yet gains even more; another withholds unduly, but comes to poverty. A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed.Be generous, your world expands. Be stingy, your world shrinks. Bless others and be blessed, help others and receive help.”It’s the concept of reaping and sowing.God challenges us to be generous because he wants us to receive the blessing that comes from it. We are generous because God is generous. Generosity is really a mindset. It’s an attitude of heart, a way of being, a lifestyle from which your thoughts, words and your actions flow.In Luke 6:38 Jesus said, “Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”When you are generous it flows from a faith and trust in God’s provision and his generosity towards you. When you are being generous you push past the barriers of your comfort zone and go above and beyond, whether you are giving of your time, your service, your hospitality, your financial resources. You don’t live from fear of not having enough.Our culture today feeds our individualistic and consumer mindset and tries to get us to believe that we always need more, we will never have enough; and that can keep us gripping tightly to what we do have. As followers of Jesus, we live in light of biblical principles and God’s economy and from the truth that we have a generous God who calls us to imitate him.Where have you been stingy? How have you been holding back? How is God calling you to live a lifestyle of generosity?What are the serving needs in your church and how can you be generous with your time? How can you generously give of your financial resources to support ministries in and outside of the church? Who is a friend, family member, or neighbor that has a need you can graciously meet?Remember that God will supply all of your needs and that you get to be the hands and feet of Jesus by supplying the needs of others. So, let’s be like Jesus and live generously.(Click here to download the devotional for the entire week.)
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)When was the last time you encouraged someone? I mean, more than a “good job,” or a pat on the back. Not to say those are not meaningful. But when was the last time you told someone what you valued about them and showed them genuine appreciation?Not too long ago I was feeling a bit discouraged in my ministry. I was really questioning if my life and my work in that season was making an impact.Have you ever wondered if what you are doing is making a difference, adding value for others? As those questions were stirring in my head I just so happened to head to the mailbox, and to my surprise there was an envelope addressed to me. I eagerly opened it to find a handwritten note from a woman specifically sharing how her life had been impacted by my ministry. Now I am not saying this to boast about myself. I am sharing this as a reminder that we all need a boost of encouragement from time to time.First Thessalonians 5:11 says, “Encourage one another and build one another up, just as in fact you are doing.” The definition of encourage is, to inspire with hope, courage, or confidence. Paul is talking about encouraging one another in our faith yet this idea of encouragement can be applied to various people and various circumstances in life. When I was asking God about my ministry and questioning if I was in the right place, I felt like that handwritten note was an answered prayer and a reminder that God sees me. The reality is, God uses people. He uses you to encourage others and spur them on. As followers of Jesus, we have the privilege and the responsibility to build each other up.Who can you share an encouraging word with? Maybe it’s a co-worker and you can point out what you value about working with her. One interesting statistic is that 75% of employees who quit their jobs cite lack of appreciation as a key factor in their leaving. So maybe it’s encouraging a co-worker. Or,maybe it’s your spouse. Perhaps you have been taking what they do for granted and you want to share what you appreciate. It can be a friend, a parent, a neighbor, or pastor. To whom will you take the time to write a handwritten note, stop by the office or make a phone call to encourage?I have a plant on a shelf in my living room that I often forget to water. Sometimes it can look a little wilted but when I water it, it perks right up. Consider that your encouragement is like that watering can. A bit of encouragement poured out can nourish a soul.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)If you were to take inventory of your words over the past 24 hours, would they fall into the “generous” category? The dictionary definition of generous is, “Free from meanness or smallness of mind or character. Abundant. Characterized by a noble or kindly spirit.” If you were to monitor your words, are they mean or kind? Are they generous?Proverbs 16:24 says, “Kind words are like honey—sweet to the soul and healthy for the body.”Do your words bring health to others? Are they sweet to people’s souls? Are the words you speak to yourself about yourself sweet and kind?I was having dinner with a dear friend the other day. She was sharing all of the negative thoughts about herself that she has been ruminating on, the condemning and critical words about herself that are on repeat in her head. She made an interesting connection to the lies she believes about herself and how that impacts her words and actions towards others. It's so true when you think about it. If you have negative self-talk, it will impact the way you show up with and behave towards others. You may come across insecure, impatient, unforgiving and judgmental. What you say about yourself to yourself impacts the way you are with others. What are the unkind words you believe about yourself and speak to yourself?What mean words do you find yourself thinking about or saying to others? Proverbs 18:21 is a familiar verse. I think it is one most of us can rehearse yet are we heeding these words of wisdom? Are you practicing these truths daily? “Words kill, words give life; they’re either poison or fruit—you choose” (Proverbs 18:21, MSG).Your self talk will either lead to you poisoning yourself or believing truth about who you are and bring you life. Your speech towards others will either kill them and cut them down to size, or give life to those in your midst.Do people experience God’s grace because you avoid being harsh with your words? Do people experience God’s kindness because of the tone of your voice? Your words and the way you communicate them is important. You get to choose your words. Choose wisely. Be generous with your words and bring health and life to those around you.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)In Ephesians 3 Paul prayed the following prayer over Christ followers. These are familiar verses in the Bible but take these truths in and let Paul’s prayer sink into your heart and soul.I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit. Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God (Ephesians 3:16-19, NLT).Do you know how wide, long, high, and deep God’s love is for you? Paul goes to great measures to attempt to capture the vastness of Jesus’s affection for his sons and daughters, for you. He wants your roots to grow down into God’s love, to experience the magnitude of Christ’s love so that you will take hold of the fullness of life and the power of God at work in you. I don’t want to live thinking that God’s love for me is lukewarm, or that in some way I am unlovable. Do you?If you live from a place of being unlovable, if you buy into the lie that God does not really love you or that there is some way you have to earn his love, you are giving the enemy a foothold, a strategic position from which he can advance and multiply his lies. Satan’s greatest attempt is to convince you that you aren’t loveable. This leads to isolation, fear, anxiety, and addiction. When you are not fully convinced of God’s love for you, you will go looking for love in all the wrong places.When you feel unlovable, stand firm in truth. Remind yourself of Paul's prayer in Ephesians 3. And, recite these words to yourself, “I am convinced that Jesus’s love for me is gigantic and generous. I trust in God’s love for me and my roots are deeply grounded in his love. The love of Jesus gives me strength. My heart trusts in him.”Let this be a reminder to you to trust God’s generous love for you.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)When you hear the word generosity, what comes to mind? We tend to think of generosity in terms of money or giving of our material blessings. And while that is true and as followers of Jesus, we are called to be generous with our finances, generosity has far greater meaning than money.Consider this: Generosity is a mindset. Being generous is an attitude of heart. It’s a way of being, a lifestyle from which your thoughts, words and your actions flow.Are you living with a mind and heart set on being generous? Are you living a lifestyle of generosity?It will be difficult to live a lifestyle of generosity if you have a scarcity mindset. When you don’t think you have enough of something, the tendency will be to hold what you do have with a tight grip. I have often found myself living from scarcity rather than living from the truth that God is generous. He does not withhold anything good from me. He does not withhold anything good from you.Psalm 84:11 says, “For the Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord bestows favor and honor. No good thing does he withhold from those who walk uprightly” (ESV).I love the reminder of the truth that God is a generous God. We see more evidence in Philippians 4:19 which says, “And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus” (ESV).Notice the apostle Paul’s words “my God will supply every need.” I know sometimes it doesn’t feel like God is supplying your every need. You ask for things and pray for things that do not get answered in the way you want or the timing you anticipate and then you decide that God withholds good things.But God doesn’t withhold. He cannot go against his nature. You have to train your mind and heart to look for his provision in every circumstance and realize while it may be packaged differently than you would have imagined, God is always providing. He is always supplying for your every need because that is who he is.Is there an area of your life that you feel God is withholding something good from you?Take time to talk to Jesus. Share your disappointment. Rehearse what is true, that God doesn’t withhold from you. Ask him to help you see and experience his generosity and all of the ways he is providing for you in this season.
My first great gift idea is the gift of a listening ear. Do you know how many people there are in this world—in your life—that would love to have a listening ear for Christmas? Someone who simply will give them time and let them talk about whatever is on their heart.I often think of elderly people who we sometimes overlook in our busy lives. Does an elderly person you know come to your mind right now? What about making an opportunity to sit down with them, have a cup of coffee, and just listen. Even if you don’t personally know someone like that, you could visit a nursing home and make yourself available to someone there. Often those in nursing homes have few if any people in their lives who visit them. Can you imagine how thrilled they would be for you to simply say, “How’re you doing? Tell me about yourself.” It would be the best gift you could give them. And you’d be surprised how interesting and entertaining their stories can be.Maybe there are some children or teenagers in your life that would love to have someone to talk to. Why not give them a listening ear for Christmas? If you know someone who has experienced a significant loss lately, they would usually love a listening ear. You might feel like you don’t know what to say to them, but the thing is, you don’t have to say much of anything. Just listen.It won’t be hard for you to find someone who needs a listening ear; why don’t you give it to them? It will make Christmas for them.James 1 tells us we are to be quick to listen and slow to speak. So, great gift idea number 1 is “Give a listening ear.”Here’s idea number 2: Give a helping hand. Jesus said that whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant (Mark 10:43). We are called as Christ-followers to serve as he did. So, what acts of service could you do this Christmas for some unexpecting person? Just one intentional act of offering a helping hand could absolutely make someone’s Christmas the best ever.It might be something you do for a sick or disabled person you know. It might be doing some shopping for or with a widow or widower you know. Or just someone who is lonely. You could design a card that said something like: “My gift to you this year is to do something that would be helpful to you.” You might even give them a list to choose from, such as cleaning their house, cooking a meal, taking them shopping, washing their car—and any number of other acts of service from which they could choose.In Acts 9:36 we read: “In Joppa there was a disciple named Tabitha (in Greek her name is Dorcas); she was always doing good and helping the poor.” Always doing good and helping poor people! What a reputation to have! There are lots of ways to help poor people these days. You could serve a meal at a shelter, or volunteer at a charity.How about babysitting for an exhausted single mom so she can have a night or day to herself? Many cannot afford babysitters, and that would be a very helpful gift.There are so many creative ways to give a helping hand, and so many needy people. I have no doubt that you can come up with the perfect gift for someone you know. All it takes is a little time and a caring heart.Here’s suggestion number 3: How about giving forgiveness? Are you harboring something in your heart against someone? Have you allowed a root of bitterness to grow in the soil of your soul because someone has hurt you? Don’t you think it would be a great Christmas if you decided to give up that resentment and offer forgiveness?Perhaps they have never asked you to forgive them. That does indeed require a very special gift of forgiveness from you. But here’s the thing—withholding forgiveness causes you far more harm than it does the other person. It’s like taking rat poison and expecting the rat to die. So, in effect, giving forgiveness to someone else is a very wonderful gift that you give yourself.You know, it may just be a very small thing—something your mate or s...
Leave it better than you found it. That’s a Boy Scout slogan. I’ve never been a Boy Scout, but I’m sure I could benefit from making that a personal goal—to leave everything better than I found it— a personal goal.I’ve talked about a leaving our jobs better than we found them, leaving our relationships and environments better than we found them and leaving our churches better than we found them.I want to tell you about my friend, Cynthia, who definitely left a situation at her work so much better than she found it. Some years ago, she worked in a department where one coworker made it very clear that she and Cynthia could never be friends because Cynthia was African-American. It’s hard to believe that someone would actually say that, but this person said those very words to Cynthia.Thankfully, Cynthia was able to get beyond her hurt feelings and respond appropriately to this situation. She prayed about it, and got the idea to start what she called “Project Love.” Now, she didn’t announce to her coworkers that she was starting “Project Love,” she just decided to do it. Besides being kind and considerate on a daily basis, she decided to invite each person in her department to have lunch with her as her guest. So once a week she would deliver a written invitation to a coworker, including this woman who said they could never be friends.Well, who can refuse such an invitation? So, the two of them went to lunch, they began to get to know each other, this woman saw how wrong her attitude was and what a good friend Cynthia would be, and before long they became friends. Now this woman openly and proudly claims Cynthia as a friend, and though they no longer work together, they keep in touch.Cynthia left that place and that relationship so much better than she found it. She could have responded with anger and bitterness, but she chose to respond in love. That’s the power that we have as believers because we have the Holy Spirit within us to enable us to do what otherwise we would find impossible to do.I hope you’ll remember this simple slogan: Leave it better than you found it. It’s one way to show God’s love to others.(Click here to download the devotional for the entire week.)
How’s your church doing? Since I’ve been on staff at my church, I’m well aware that churches that thrive and do well are those who have lots of involvement from the congregation. I’m proposing that we adopt the Boy Scout mantra to leave things better than we found them, and I was thinking how much better our churches would be doing if every church member took that seriously.You know, it’s not difficult to find things wrong with your church. It’s full of people—people who make mistakes, people who don’t have it all together, many are new believers with lots to learn. So, you won’t have trouble finding something about your church that you don’t like so much. But if it’s a Bible preaching church, under godly leadership, and that’s where God has put you, then you have to ask yourself what you’re doing to make it a better church.I think of a woman who was in our church until God called her home—we called her Miss Shirley. Miss Shirley never held an office in our church, but few people have benefited the church like she did. For years she made it her job to greet someone new every Sunday, invite someone new to sit with her, get to know them, and just share God’s love with them. One of my friends tells how when she started coming to our church, she was very wounded and was trying to just isolate herself from everyone, but Miss Shirley found her, sat with her, invited her to a Sunday class, and eventually helped her get involved and find healing. Miss Shirley definitely left our church better than she found it.Just ask yourself: If you dropped out of your church today, would it leave a hole? Would your service to the church be missed?God created us for community; we are one body in Christ, and we need each other for fellowship, for healing, for growth, for accountability. I hope you are very much committed to your church and you can say for sure that you are leaving it better than you found it.
The Christian Working Woman, began in 1984 to challenge workplace Christians to see their jobs as assignments from God, not just a place to earn a living. And the way we live on those jobs has a greater impact for the Gospel than anything else.I’m taking a phrase from the Boy Scouts and applying it to our lives. It is: Leave it better than you found it. I’ve talked about leaving our jobs better than we found them and leaving our relationships better than we found them.Now let’s think about leaving our environment better than we found it. There’s a lot of concern about what’s happening to our environment, and we should be good stewards of God’s universe, that’s for sure. Which means we recycle as much as possible and do whatever we can to make our physical world better than we found it.Then there’s our more personal environment: our living space and our working space. I have a friend who decided she could do something for the environment. She got tired of how messy and unclean public washrooms tend to be. So, she decided that she would try to leave any washroom she used better than she found it. When she told me what she was doing, I realized I had never even thought of taking that kind of responsibility—to leave a public space better than I found it. But if we all did that, we’d live in cleaner, nicer environments, wouldn’t we? Our streets and roadways wouldn’t be cluttered with trash.Someone has said that cleanliness is next to godliness, and while I’m not sure that can be supported biblically, there’s no doubt that we should care about cleanliness for ourselves and for others. So, why don’t we just decide to leave our environments—wherever they may be—better than we found them.
Leave it better than you found it! What a good idea. I’m taking a look at how we, as Christians, can leave things better than we found them. I talked about how to leave your job better than you found it and now I encourage you to consider how to leave your relationships better than you found them.Relationships are the sandpaper of life, are they not? We all need to live in relationship with others, and yet getting along with the people in our lives can be the toughest assignment we have. So, how can we leave our relationships better than we found them?Let’s start with what we call the Golden Rule, which Jesus gave us when he said, “Treat other people exactly as you would like to be treated by them—this is the essence of all true religion” (Matthew 7:12 Phillips). Jesus says that we should take the initiative to improve the relationships of our lives, not wait on the other person to do it. Has someone treated you ill lately? If so, are you willing to put this Golden Rule into practice and respond to them the way you wish they would respond to you? If so, you will definitely improve that relationship.Here’s another relationship principle from the Bible that will definitely leave a relationship better than you found it. From Philippians 2:3-4:Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.Putting others first is a sure winner when it comes to improving relationships. I remember when I read that passage and just shook my head because I couldn’t figure how in the world I could ever live up to it. Consider others better than me? That doesn’t come naturally for me, how about you? So, I just began to pray and ask God to show me how to put this into practice. God showed me that it begins with an attitude of the heart—consider others better than yourself, think of others in that way. I find that if I change my thought life and truly remind myself that others are just important as I am and what they’re doing is just as important as what I’m doing, then I can start to truly look to their interests, and not just my own.Well, if we practiced these two principles in our relationships, there is no doubt we’d see great improvement, and we’d leave them better than we found them.
There’s a slogan from the Boy Scouts that I like a lot: Leave it better than you found it. It’s good for Boy Scouts, but don’t you think that Christians should have that same kind of attitude? I’m going to talk about what we should leave better than we found it.We should leave our jobs better than we found them. I’m not suggesting you literally leave your job, but rather that because you are doing your job, things should be better where you work. Your presence in that job should be a positive thing, so that if you did leave the job, it would be better than you found it.Another way to put that is to ask, If everyone in your organization worked like you do, would the organization be better off? For example, If everyone worked as hard as you do—put in the same number of hours really working—would productivity go up or down? If everyone arrived at work the same time you do, would everyone be on time or late? If everyone were as creative as you are, finding new and better ways to do things, would there be new initiatives and new ideas happening—or not? If everyone were as willing to go the extra mile like you do, would there be more people exceeding requirements—or less? If everyone were as positive and upbeat as you are, would there be a better morale where you work, or would it be worse? If everyone were as neat and tidy as you are and cleaned up after themselves like you do, would the work environment be nicer or messier? If everyone talked about others in the organization the way you do, would there be lots of positive confirmation going around, or lots of gossip?You get the idea. Paul wrote to the Corinthians that “if we were more discerning with regard to ourselves, we would not come under such judgment” (1 Corinthians 11:31). It’s just smart to check up on ourselves—to judge ourselves—and avoid coming under judgment by others, so ask yourself if you are leaving your job better than you found it!
As our story began last week, Fran was asked by her manager to be on a committee to plan the company Christmas party. She really didn't want to do that, because the party is notorious for its drinking and bawdy atmosphere. Certainly, she does not want to be associated with anything like that, but she felt trapped.However, Jesus encouraged her to be an assertive member of that committee and work to get the party changed this year to a more family-oriented affair. So, at his urging, Fran volunteers to head up the committee and suggests they change the format to a party for the children, with gifts and games and prizes and no alcoholic beverages.Bill, who headed up the party for the last few years, was indignant at the suggestion, and eventually stomped out of the committee meeting, claiming no more association with the party and Fran's “Sunday school ideas.” We left the story at this point last week.As Bill left, the room was quiet and the other committee members seemed nervous. Fran knew it was her move, but she wasn't sure what to say. She didn't want to railroad her idea through; yet she believed the others felt the same way she did but were reluctant to stick their necks out.Finally, Fran says to the group, "I'm sorry about Bill leaving, and I'm going to try to get him to rejoin the group. But I still believe we ought to have a different kind of party this year and just see how everyone likes it. We'll never know until we try. But I need to know how the rest of you think about this."Elizabeth says, "Well, I don't want to spoil everybody's party. I mean, if the employees really want the same kind of party we've had in years past, I guess that's the easy way.... I don't know."Fran is disappointed in Elizabeth because she had been in favor of the family party idea. "Well," Fran says to the group, "the question is, do you think most of the employees want the same kind of party we had before, with lots of drinking and stuff like that? You know the people you work with; what have they said to you?"John finally pipes in and says, "Well, I know three people in my department who said they're not coming to the party this year because things got so noisy and rough last year.""Yeah," Virginia suddenly finds her voice, "I just told my husband that last week. I think there are several people in my department that would prefer a family party."And with their comments, the others seem to be in agreement that it would be a good idea to have a family-oriented party this year. Fran is encouraged, and they set out to make the necessary plans, assigning jobs and duties for the various things that must be done. By the time the meeting is over, there is enthusiasm in the room and they leave in a spirit of unity and excitement about the party."Wow," Fran thinks as she walks back to her office, "that seemed to turn around pretty good. I think we'll have a terrific party and it will go over a lot better than the out-of-control events they've had before."Fran shakes her head in amazement at what she's learning about being a Christian in the marketplace. It's really different than she would have imagined, much harder in some ways, but with many opportunities she had not dreamed of.When she gets back to her office, the phone rings. It's Marilyn, her boss. "Fran, Bill just stopped into my office hopping mad because—to quote him—"you took over the committee meeting and forced your Sunday school ideas on the group.” What happened?" she asks.For the next ten minutes Fran explains what happened. Marilyn says, "Well, okay, but don't be surprised if Bill causes a stink over this. He was pretty heated."When Fran hangs us, she prays, “Lord, what can I do about Bill? He could sabotage the whole thing if he gets to the right people and they believe his story." She thinks quietly about the situation and refuses to allow the panic feelings to take over. "Lord, I know I did what you wanted me to do,
I’ve been talking about generosity this week—the joy of being a truly generous person. I want to remind you that God gave first. You know the verse, John 3:16: For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. That is the ultimate example of generosity. Jesus condescended to earth, leaving the glory of heaven, sacrificing all that was rightfully his, to provide eternal life for us.So, when we choose to be generous, even sacrificially generous, we are following Jesus for sure, showing the same attitude he had, learning the truth that it is more blessed to give than to receive. And after all, everything we think we own is just on loan to us. God owns it all and we are simply stewards—caretakers. Psalm 24:1 says that the earth is the Lord’s and everything in it, which includes everything you have! So when you decide to give some money—to be generous—you’re really giving away someone else’s money, right? And that is truly fun.As Christ-followers, when we come to the place where we truly believe that we are possessionless, we don’t own anything, everything we have is given to us both to meet our needs and then to share with others, we are moving into new growth in God’s grace and new joy as we obey God’s Word.To make the point that we are on this earth for a very short time compared to eternity, Randy Alcorn gives the illustration of drawing a line across a piece of paper, then go back and make a dot with the tip of your pen just above the beginning of line. The dot represents your time here on earth—whether that’s a hundred years or less. And as you’re in those years, it seems like a long time. But compare the long line representing eternity to the dot you made. It’s like a nanosecond. Randy says, “Live for the line, not for the dot.”So, I close with this reminder from the Apostle Paul from 2 Corinthians 9:7: Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. If that were all the Bible told us about being generous, it should be enough, don’t you think? God loves a cheerful giver, and a cheerful giver is cheerful because she or he has learned that there is great joy in being generous—there is great joy in taking God at his word and obeying him.(Click here to download the devotional for the entire week.)
If you want to be a generous person, how much of your income should you give? Often Christians say 10% - a tithe— is what we should give, and that’s a good place to start. But a study shows that only about 25% of Christians in the United States give that much.This is what C. S. Lewis had to say about how much we should give:I do not believe one can settle how much we ought to give. I am afraid the only safe rule is to give more than we can spare. In other words, if our expenditure on comforts, luxuries, amusement, etc., is up to the standard common among those with the same income as our own, we are probably giving away too little. If our giving does not at all pinch or hamper us, I should say it is too small. There ought to be things we should like to do and cannot because our commitment to giving excludes them.I don’t know about you, but that convicts me. How often have I denied myself something in order to give to others? Probably not often. But I think we should give this careful thought and prayer. Lewis points out that there’s no one answer for everyone, but the standard should be: Give more than you think you can.When you decide that you want a different attitude toward generosity and in obedience to Christ you want to take it to the next level, you are in for unexpected joys. Even if you approach this new attitude with some caution, maybe even some fear you might overdo it, I am confident you will never regret the new adventure of deciding to give, even to the point of giving sacrificially.I challenge you, as I do myself, to make a decision to give more than you’re giving now. Discover this true joy of generosity. Maybe you can deny yourself that expensive coffee you buy everyday, and give that money to the Lord. Or shop a little more carefully at the grocery store or deny yourself that new outfit. I simply remind you of what Jesus said, you will be blessed more than you can imagine when you tune your heart to be generous.
I’m addressing our “culture of more” that gets stronger all the time—the belief that contentment and fulfillment and happiness are for those who have a lot of money and “stuff.” But the Bible’s principle of generosity is exactly the opposite.Remember the parable Jesus taught about the rich man who had an abundant harvest and decided to build bigger barns so he could store his surplus grain. He said to himself, You have plenty of grain laid up for many years. Take life easy; eat, drink and be merry” But God said to him, “You fool! This very night your life will be demanded from you. Then who will get what you have prepared for yourself?” And Jesus gave this warning, This is how it will be with whoever stores up things for themselves but is not rich toward God (Luke 12:19-21).Jesus is telling us that earthly success can cause great spiritual failure. If you’ve been thinking that more money would solve all your problems, think again. There are many stories of people who won a big jackpot and it ruined their lives. So, be careful what you wish for, as they say, and hold your money loosely. Be generous whether you have a lot of money or not so much. If you were to come into a lot of money, you have no idea how much that could change your life for the worse.Think of this: how long did the “happiness” last after you bought that new thing you wanted so much? That car, or that house, or that new outfit, or that expensive vacation. Didn’t last as long as you thought it would, I imagine. But in contrast, the joy that you experience when you meet someone’s need, when you support your church, when you give to a worthy charity doesn’t go away. The “thank yous” and difference you can make in someone’s life are priceless and lasting.The Apostle Paul told the believers in Corinth: Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously (2 Corinthians 9:6). Generosity should be a trademark of all of us who are Christ-followers.
Our Lord said that “It is more blessed to give than to receive” (Acts 20:35). That word translated “blessed” is more accurately translated “happy.” It is more happy to give than to receive. Generosity—having a giving heart and attitude—is the pathway to real joy, just plain fun!When was the last time you gave something away—money or some possession—and it just made you so happy? Have you ever met an unhappy generous person? We talked about the truth that where we put our treasure is a good indication of the condition of our heart. But here’s the truth we often overlook: Being a generous person doesn’t take anything out of your life; it gives joy and fun that is far greater than the joy of receiving something as a gift.Jesus said he came to give us abundant life and one of the most important ingredients of this abundant life is generosity—looking for ways to share your money and your time, your talents. It happens when you go from “I ought to give” to “I get to give.” When instead of trying to figure how much you can afford to give, you start asking how much do you really need to keep.Maybe you’re thinking that you would be generous if you had more money. You really want to give to others but with inflation and high prices, right now you’re just trying to get by and you don’t have anything left over to give to others. I understand that, but here’s the thing: the biblical principle is true whether you have a little or a lot—it is still more fun, more blessed to give than to receive, so if you want a blessing, determine that you’ll give, even if you think it is small.There are so many benefits promised for those who are generous. Jesus said, Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you (Luke 6:38). Generosity will bring you joy and be a lot of fun, and Jesus said it will come back to you. My Daddy use to say, “Honey, you can’t outgive God,” and that is so true. I don’t know how it will come back to you or when, but Jesus said it will be poured into your lap. But note that it makes a difference whether you give with a teaspoon or with a shovel.Can I challenge you to ask God today: What do you want me to give to someone today, this week? I think he’ll put someone on your mind and then if you will obey, it will make your day! That I can promise you.
I want to talk about the “culture of more” in which we live. Let’s face it—everywhere we turn these days the message we hear is more stuff, more money, more things will make you happy. Advertising and marketing are all about making you dissatisfied with what you have, with who you are, with where you are, and convincing you that if you had more, you’d really be happy. This is a subtle influence in our culture that creeps into our thinking and our decisions far more than we realize. Not only is it subtle and insidious, it is relentless.Why do we so easily buy in to this culture of more? Because the enemy of our soul wants to entrap us into this false narrative that bigger, better and faster will make us happy—and he has a lot of help! Your smart phone and computer quickly figure out how to target you with stuff that is specifically directed to your desires.Did you know that there are more than 2300 verses in the Bible about money? In fact, Jesus spoke more about money than any other topic. That may surprise you, but it’s true that there’s more written in the Bible about money than about prayer and faith combined. So, what does that tell you? It says that our attitudes about money and what it can buy, our stewardship of the money we have, is a key part of our spiritual health and our spiritual growth.So, we really need to pay attention to what the Bible tells us, right? And let’s start with what Jesus said, For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also (Matthew 6:21). Randy Alcorn writes, “If you want a heart for something, invest in it.” A simple statement but profound in its impact in our lives. If you invest in, let’s say, a particular company in the stock market, you follow that company, you care whether it goes up or down, that investment has a part of your heart—right?Well, here’s the thing: If you invest your time and money in giving to others, helping others, supporting the things of the kingdom, your heart will grow for others, for God’s work. There’s a ministry in Kenya that we support here at The Christian Working Woman, providing scholarships for nursing students and things like that, and so we really care about that program, we care about our fellow Christians in Kenya. Our heart is there, we pray for them, because we are invested there.So, I would encourage you today to take stock of where you’re investing your treasure, whether you’re financially well off or struggling to pay your bills. Ask God to help you be more intentional about investing in God’s kingdom, because that will lead you to increased spiritual growth and vitality.
These Fran and Jesus stories have caught on; it seems we learn best from stories, and so that's why I continue to use this story-form method. These are fictitious stories, but they are based on my experience and knowledge of the workplace through many years and because I'm in contact with so many of you.In this episode Fran has to face a touchy situation. She arrives at work on a cool November morning, and as she gets settled in for her work, Marilyn, her boss, walks in."Fran, Human Resources is planning the Christmas Party for the office and they asked me to send a representative from our department. I'd like you to go to this meeting today and put your two-cents in for us, okay?" Marilyn says to Fran."Well..." Fran's head is swimming as she tries to respond to Marilyn. She remembers the party from last year. She left after being there less than an hour, even before dinner was served, because the drinking and noise and conversation were just not acceptable to her. She certainly doesn't want to be involved in that kind of activity, but Marilyn seems to be telling, rather than asking. Fran stammers a bit and says, "Well, I've got a very heavy workload right now, Marilyn, are you sure....""Yeah, I know, we're all busy, but somebody has to do it and I think you'll do a good job. So, show up today at 1:00 in the conference room.” And with that Marilyn walks out."Oh," Fran says with weariness, "what am I going to do about this? I remember the awful party they had last year at Christmas? It was the next thing to X-rated! What am I going to do?"Fran has learned at moments like this to simply stop and pray about her dilemmas. “Lord,” she says, “I need wisdom and insight to know how to handle this assignment. I didn’t ask for it; I don’t want it; but it appears I have it. So, please, let me know how you think about this issue.”Fran begins to think about last year’s party. Why was it such an awful party? “Well, it was because Bill from accounting was in charge of it, and he's a real party animal," Fran thinks to herself. “Maybe if someone else was in charge of it, it could take a different turn.”“But not me, Lord,” Fran thinks. “Not me. I don’t need this . . . I’ve got plenty to do. Not me, please, Lord.” But she can’t ignore that tug she feels inside of her head, and she can’t get the idea out of her head."Lord, are you suggesting I should get involved with planning this party?” Fran asks. "Lord, I'll have to compromise my standards and beliefs if I do that."Then, as so often happens with Fran when she seeks the Lord for wisdom, he seems to plant questions and ideas in her mind. She has a question and answer period with herself: "What standards would you have to compromise, Fran?" she asks herself."Well, for example, serving drinks. That's the major thing they do at these parties—drink. And I don't want to be associated with anything that promotes this kind of excessive drinking," Fran answers."Have you ever thought that maybe you could influence them not to serve alcoholic beverages?" she asks herself again."Not serve alcoholic beverages at the Christmas party?" Fran responds with a laugh. "Jesus, you just don't understand these parties. They would laugh me out of the room if I suggested that.""Of course,” Fran says with a laugh, “you do understand the parties because you understand everything."Fran stops and thinks about what she has said. Again, God’s Spirit in her has reminded her that Jesus is all-knowing. Occasionally she gets caught in the trap of thinking that there are some parts of life that are unfamiliar to Jesus or out of his control. She is stunned for a moment as she digests the knowledge that Jesus knows about Christmas parties!"I'm sorry, Lord," she says quietly. "I didn't mean you don't understand, it's just that these people equate Christmas parties with drinking.... but I guess you know that, too, huh?""Yes,
Fran thinks a moment then says to her, “Please, Cynthia, don’t let anything cause you to commit another sin on top of the adultery. You would be killing your child if you have an abortion,” Fran pleads.“Well, not everyone believes. . .” Cynthia tries to justify herself. But she can’t keep it up. “Oh, Fran, I know that, don’t you think I know that. But what am I going to do with his baby?”“Cynthia, let’s take it one step at a time. First, break the relationship, find out if you are pregnant, and then after you’ve crossed that bridge, we’ll consider your options if you are pregnant,” Fran says.They talk for a couple of hours, missing lunch, but Fran gets Cynthia to agree to breaking off the relationship, blocking his phone calls, and refusing to speak with this man. Fran says, “When you’re feeling weak, like you can’t stand not to talk to him or see him, please call me, any time of the day or night. Call me first. I’ll help you; I’ll pray with you,” Fran assures her.So they establish an accountability plan. Cynthia promises to take a pregnancy test first thing when she gets back home and let Fran know the results. “Oh, I hope I’m not pregnant,” she cries.“If you are, Cynthia, you will have to live with the consequences of your wrong choices and your sin, but God can turn this into something good,” Fran assures her. “There’s a woman at church who has a grown son now, born out of wedlock, but she raised him to become a strong Christian and he is a blessing in our church. Whether you choose to raise your child or let some couple adopt that child, you can be a part of that wonderful miracle of producing a life that God can use.”Cynthia has some very difficult days ahead of her, but if she will follow Fran’s advice and make herself accountable, if she will begin a daily diet of Bible study and prayer and get back in close relationship to the Lord, she can watch a miracle in her own life as God again does what he is so good at doing—turning our deserts into gardens and our ashes into beauty.(Click here to download the devotional for the entire week.)
How do you help someone who has messed up her life and can’t see her way out? That’s the dilemma that Fran finds herself in as we continue the story of Fran and Jesus on the Job.After Fran strongly advises her to sever the relationship with this man, Cynthia says to her, “But I’ve tried many times to stop seeing him, and I just can’t. I mean, I really love him and he really loves me.”“You’re telling yourself some lies there Cynthia, and you need to know that” Fran says. “First, you can stop seeing him. You can block his phone calls and texts, move if you have to, go to another church if you have to, and simply say NO. So, don’t keep telling yourself that you can’t stop seeing him. Of course you can,” Fran continues.“And it really doesn’t matter whatsoever whether you think he loves you or you love him. This relationship is wrong, it is sinful, and you have no right to steal this man’s affection from his wife.”“I didn’t steal him,” Cynthia starts to object. “He called me.”“And you could have hung up the first time he called and you’d never be in this predicament,” Fran says. “I don’t mean to be tough on you, Cynthia, but until you are willing to accept the responsibility that is yours and call this what it is—a sin against God—you’ll just continue to mire in this mess and make matters worse.”Cynthia begins to sob. Fran feels like she has upset her with her tough talk, but Jesus says, “Fran, the truth often hurts. Let Cynthia hear what you’ve said.” So, they sit in silence for a few minutes.“I suppose I could get an abortion,” Cynthia whispers. “Then it would be easier to break up with him.”“Oh, Cynthia, no, no,” Fran begs. “Don’t even once let that thought enter your mind. If you are pregnant, that child is a life inside of you. You cannot take that life. No, Cynthia, no. You will never forgive yourself.”“But Fran, that’s easy for you to say. You’re not in my shoes,” Cynthia looks at Fran.Fran doesn’t know how to respond. It’s true, she’s never had to make that decision, but does that mean she can’t advise Cynthia to make the right choice? What do you think?
The Bible teaches us to speak the truth in love, but that’s not always easy to do, is it? Fran finds herself counseling a woman she has just met at their church’s women’s retreat. This woman, Cynthia, seemed very troubled, and as Fran talked privately with her, she confessed that she has been having an affair with a married man.Finally Cynthia looks at Fran and says, “But I think I may be pregnant with his baby.” It feels as though the floor has dropped out from under her as Fran thinks how to respond.“Keep sticking with the truth, Fran,” Jesus whispers to her. “This doesn’t change the advice you gave her.”Fran puts her arm around Cynthia and holds her for a minute. Then she says, “Cynthia, this may seem cruel, but the fact that you may be pregnant doesn’t change your course of action. He is a married man and there is no possibility that he will marry you, so you must break this relationship once and for all.”“But,” Cynthia says, “I think if he knows I’m pregnant, he might divorce his wife and marry me.”“Cynthia, that would be heaping one bad decision on top of another,” Fran says with emphasis. “Do he and his wife have children?”“Yes, two boys,” Cynthia adds, “but they don’t have a good marriage.”“Oh, Cynthia, you can’t go there. Even suggesting that he break up another marriage to marry you—that is wrong and you’ll never forgive yourself if you do that,” Fran advises.“But it’s his baby and he got me pregnant. . . if I am pregnant,” Cynthia adds.“Wait a minute Cynthia, what about the role you played in this affair?” Fran asks. “Did he rape you?”“No,” Cynthia replies quietly.“You were a willing participant, Cynthia. You’ve got to take responsibility and refuse to make more wrong decisions and choices,” Fran tells her. “It’s time you did the right thing and make the best you can out of this mess. Besides, you don’t even know for sure that you’re pregnant.”“No, I’m afraid to find out,” Cynthia says. “What will I do with a baby?”“There are several good alternatives, and I promise we’ll help you, if you’ll just do the right thing,” Fran says.Do you think Fran is giving Cynthia good advice?
Have you ever felt like God led you to someone just at a moment when they had a great need for a friend and a counselor?“How did you know something was wrong?” Cynthia asks Fran through her sobs.“Just the look on your face, I guess, Cynthia,” Fran replies. “Do you want to talk about it?”“No, I don’t want to but. . .” Cynthia hesitates. “I think I’m going to burst if I don’t talk to somebody.”“Well, I promise you I will keep this conversation confidential, if that helps,” Fran says.“Yes, well, it does. It just seems funny talking about this to a complete stranger,” Cynthia says.“But you know,” Fran assures her, “I don’t think it was an accident that God put it in my heart to talk to you.”“Yeah, I guess so. And in some ways it’s easier to talk to a stranger about it. You see, I. . . I. . .I’ve been having an affair with a married man. . .” Cynthia’s words come out slowly with great pain.“Umm, I see,” Fran replies, without alarm. “Are you continuing that affair now?” she asks.“Well, I keep telling him that I’m not going to see him anymore, but as soon as he calls, I give in,” Cynthia answers. “You see, my husband left me with two kids five years ago and I guess I’m just so lonely. . .”“Cynthia, do you want me to talk with you straight?” Fran asks.“Yes,” Cynthia says, “I guess I need some straight talk.”“Well, then, the first thing you have to do is absolutely sever this relationship, immediately, finally, forever, with no further contact of any kind. Whatever it takes to keep him from contacting you, that is what you have to do,” Fran advises. “Are you willing to do that?”Cynthia is silent. Fran wonders if she was too strong, too hard on her. But she hears the voice of Jesus: “Don’t say anything, Fran. You’ve given her biblical advice that is right, so let her think about it. Don’t back off.”
For many years now I’ve been telling this story of a workplace woman named Fran, who is forced back into the job market when her husband is suddenly killed. With two young children, Fran has faced many struggles as a single working mom, but through it all she is learning to practice the presence of Jesus. And that is the purpose of these stories—to encourage all of us to be continually aware of the presence of our Lord, because when we’re born from above, he is with us always.This is a busy week for Fran because her church is sponsoring a weekend retreat for the women, and she’s in charge of registration. Drew and Alice are staying with her folks while she is away, and on Friday afternoon she leaves work a little early to take the kids over and get them settled. Then she meets some friends at the church, where they carpool to the camp grounds, about 30 miles out of the city.Friday evening is a fun time, and Fran is well prepared to welcome the women and help them get settled. Over 150 have registered to come, and the fellowship is really wonderful.Saturday morning they have a general session with great music and a wonderful speaker who talks about putting our past behind us. Afterwards they form small groups to discuss the topic. Fran begins the discussion by saying, “You know, even though it’s been six years since Jim was killed, I still find myself living in the past and dreaming of the way my life used to be.”Her friend, Andrea, joins in. “I know; it just seems so hard sometimes to let go of the past, whether it’s the good past or the bad past.”The conversation continues, but Fran notices that one woman in the group is very quiet. Her name is Cynthia; she’s new to Fran, and she just seems to be miserable. As the group breaks up, Fran makes a point to walk with Cynthia and start a conversation.“We’re so glad you joined us for our retreat. Is this your first time?” Fran asks.“Yes,” replies Cynthia, but says nothing more.Not knowing what to say, Fran finally asks, “Are you okay? Is there anything I can do to help you?”At this, Cynthia covers her face with her hands and tries to control her sobs. Fran guides her to a secluded place where they can talk privately. Somehow Fran senses that God has ordained this meeting, but she wonders what in the world could be upsetting Cynthia so much.
Do you know what is probably the most difficult command of God's for me to obey? It's "Stand still and see this great thing the Lord is about to do before your eyes!" (1 Samuel 12:16). Come on, Lord; why "stand still"? Why not "Get busy and do this and that and then you'll see the great thing the Lord is about to do before your eyes"? That would be so much easier for me.As I mentioned, I don't like standing still. I hate standing still. I love movement. I love busyness. I love activity. I love to-do lists. Let's go; let's do; let's make things happen. You can do it. Just keep trying. Keep on keepin' on. Those words are music to my ears, but not "stand still.”Why is it so hard for us to take our hands off and let God run the show? Well, to answer that question for myself, I would say it's hard for me to stand still because I'm a controller. I want to be in charge. That's my personality and I'm much more comfortable when I'm running things than when I'm having to take orders. My guess is you may be the same way.I'd rather drive than be a passenger; I'd rather give a presentation than listen to one; I'd rather lead than follow. So, I constantly struggle to take control of any situation I'm in. Therefore, "stand still and see this great thing the Lord is about to do before your eyes" is hard for me to do.When you dig a little deeper under that personality trait, you discover that the need to control indicates you think you can do it better than anybody else and you don't trust others as much as you do yourself. Ouch! There's a lot of pride and sinfulness tucked in that controlling spirit, isn't there? That's hard to take, but it's part of the truth we have to face about ourselves.At one point in my life when I was going through a particularly difficult period of "standing still," I would get frustrated and start to take action. And each time, as I would start taking the controls back in my own hands, I would hear the quiet voice of God in my mind saying to me, quite simply, "Can't you trust me?”That's what it takes to stand still—it takes trust. And when you and I are willing to take our hands off, give up the control, and stand still, we are saying to Jesus, "I trust you. You're smarter than me. You can run this show better than I can.” And when we stand still and demonstrate our faith in him, he is pleased.Another reason standing still is hard for me is that I'm just not a patient person. I want things to happen now. I hate waiting. My mind tells me, "If you're standing still, nothing is happening.” But God's Word says, "Stand still and see this great thing the Lord is about to do before your eyes.”I think one reason I am not a patient person is because I hate loose ends. I want to complete the loop and make sure every package has a neat bow on it before moving on. But so often life is full of loose ends, and we have to stand still and let them be.Paul wrote that patience is one of the fruits of the Spirit, one of the evidences that God's Spirit is in control of your life. Well, I can sure tell you that when I am patient, it is not me, it is God's Spirit in me, because I'm no good at being patient. But I’ve learned to pray a lot about being patient, and believe it or not, I am more patient today than I used to be. God is helping me learn how to stand still and let him do it!Here are some little secrets that are helping me learn how to stand still. When you are emotional about any situation, it is not the time to act. Stand still until your emotions have calmed down and you can be certain that you're thinking straight. Just today I dashed off an email to tell someone how to do something more effectively—or so I thought—but thankfully before I hit the send button, God’s Spirit just urged me not to send it. So, for once I didn’t let the emotional reaction of the moment cause me to do something without thought or prayer. Often we really want to do something when we're upset or angry,
Let’s review how Christians are like pumpkins: First, God picks us from the patches of life, brings us into his family, and cleans us up. Then he digs inside of us and scoops out all the yucky stuff that is clogging us up. He gets rid of the seeds of anger and rage and malice—and all those other things which have kept us on bondage for too long. Then he puts a new look on our face, a new song in our heart, and puts his light inside us to shine through us for all the world to see.This simple presentation can be very effective for children or adults. Just get a pumpkin and as you clean it up and scoop it out and put a smiling face on it with a candle inside, you can explain how in the same way God does this for us who have become his children through faith in Jesus Christ.I have found that any kind of visual presentation along with a message increases its effectiveness many times. We remember what we see far longer than what we hear. So, I’m always looking for creative ways to make a message memorable and practical.Let me remind us once again of how God has transformed us from the dirty pumpkins we were, taken us out of our sinful pumpkin patches and made us new creations in Christ. Psalm 30:11-12 expresses this so well: You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my heart may sing your praises and not be silent. Lord my God, I will praise you forever.(Click here to download the devotional for the entire week.)
Since we’re in the season of using pumpkins for food and decorations, I thought I’d point out how we Christians are somewhat like those pumpkins. First, God has to pick us from the “pumpkin patches” of our lives, clean us up, and then scoop out all the yucky stuff inside. We covered how the seeds that grow inside of us have to be truly cleaned out.One of the favorite things to do with pumpkins at this harvest time is to make jack-o-lanterns. After scooping out all the yucky stuff from inside, then we carve a smiling face and put a candle inside to light it up. And the process is similar with how God changes us when we allow him to clean out all the yucky stuff inside.He carves a new smiling face and puts his light inside of us to shine for all the world to see.One of my favorite passages is Psalm 40:2-3: He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. With a new song to sing and a smile on your face, you truly become a light in your world, as Jesus intended when he said: You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden (Matthew 5:14).Proverbs 15:13 says, A happy heart makes the face cheerful, but heartache crushes the spirit. And again in verse 30: Light in a messenger’s eyes brings joy to the heart, and good news gives health to the bones.Do you carry a cheerful look and a happy face into your world each day? I’m not talking about a phony smile or pretending that everything is right. But I am talking about allowing God’s light inside of you to shine through you regardless of the circumstances. Anyone can look cheerful when everything is going right, but when life is tough, that’s when the smiling face really makes a difference.Did you know that when you smile, you get those endorphins going inside you and that can actually change the way you feel. And sometimes the smile comes first and the joy comes later, so, it’s a very good discipline to just remember to smile more and let the light of Christ shine through you.
Have you ever cleaned out a pumpkin? At this time of year, we enjoy pumpkin pies and muffins and other delicious pumpkin dishes. But before we can use that pumpkin, we must clean it out on the inside, right?God picks us from the patch, washes off the dirt of sin, and then he has to clean us up on the inside.He cuts off the top and scoops out all the yucky stuff. The Christian life is a process that begins at that moment that Jesus picks us out of the patch and cleans us up. Then begins the process of transforming us into the likeness of Jesus. This is a process that continues throughout all our earthly days. Sometimes that process can be painful, as we are confronted with the mess on the inside of us, the yucky stuff that is clogging us up.Just as there are lots of seeds inside a pumpkin that have to be removed, so in our hearts there are many seeds that need to be cleaned out. Paul wrote to the Colossians: You used to walk in these ways, in the life you once lived. But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips (Colossians 3:7-8). And again he wrote: Since we have these promises, dear friends, let us purify ourselves from everything that contaminates body and spirit, perfecting holiness out of reverence for God (2 Corinthians 7:1).What seeds are still clogging up inside of you, contaminating your body and spirit? Years ago, I wrote this verse in my prayer journal, and I began to pray that God will help me clean up whatever it is that is contaminating my body and my spirit. And God has faithfully pointed many of those seeds out to me and given the grace and power to start cleaning them out.Paul named some of these seeds that have to be cleaned out: Anger and rage must be scooped out of your heart. You know, when you allow anger to remain, it will quickly turn into bitterness, which is a deadly heart contamination. It will ruin your spirit and your physical body.Malice and slander are seeds that we cannot afford to keep around. Regardless of how others treat you, you must not allow malice to reside in your heart toward them. It sours on you quickly and makes you miserable.Scooping out the yucky stuff may not be pleasant, but it produces the peaceable fruit of righteousness, and that is very worthwhile and very wonderful.
Christians are like pumpkins! This season when pumpkins are ripe and we use them for all kinds of delicious dishes, as well as decorations, it’s interesting to see how we are like those pumpkins.For example, pumpkins first must be picked from the patch, brought in and cleaned up. And when we are born from above and made new creations in Christ, he chooses us from our dirty pumpkin patches, and brings us into his family, and cleanses us from the sin and dirt of this world.It is true that we never want to dwell on our past and live in regret. What God has forgiven and we have forsaken should no longer keep us in bondage. But it is also true that we need to remember where we were before Christ brought us in from our pumpkin patch. A. W. Tozer has written:“The only sure defense against self-righteousness is to cultivate a quiet state of continual penitence. A sweet but sobering memory of our past guilt and a knowledge of our present imperfections are not incompatible with the joy of the Lord; and they are of inestimable aid in resisting the enemy.”Remember your pumpkin patch today—the place you were before Christ picked you up and brought you in. Remember, and give thanks that he has redeemed you from that life and given you new life and hope for a bright future.Because we’ve been given new life in Christ, our demeanor and our attitudes should be joyful, don’t you think? You may be in a place you don’t particularly want to be in, a job you’re not crazy about, dealing with people you’re not fond of. But you have a wonderful opportunity, right in that spot, to be a witness for Jesus simply by being a joyful, positive person. After all, you’ve been saved from the pumpkin patch and you have every reason to rejoice. So, today, wherever God has you now planted, make a commitment to rejoice all day long as you remember that you’ve been rescued from the pumpkin patch and made new in Christ.
It’s pumpkin time again! At this time of year we see lots of those delicious pumpkins, some for eating, some for decorating. But did you ever think of this: Christians are like pumpkins! Now wait, that’s not an insult. Let me explain.First of all, we’re like pumpkins because:God picks us from the patch, brings us in, and washes all the dirt off of us.For those who have been born from above, our salvation began when God picked us out of the patch. Jesus said in John 15:16: You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit—fruit that will last. And Paul reminds us in Ephesians 1:4: For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight.I never cease to be amazed at this truth, that God chose me. He picked me out of that dirty pumpkin patch of life and brought me into the fold of his care, made me his child and called me by name.But you know, a pumpkin is of little use until you get it cleaned up. I don’t know if you’ve ever picked a pumpkin or seen one right out of the pumpkin patch, but they are really dirty. They lie on the ground for many days and collect all kinds of dirt and mud, so when you bring them in, the first thing you have to do is get them cleaned up.And that’s the first thing God does for us when he chooses us from the dirty patch we were in. We read in 1 Corinthians 6:11: And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.And again in Titus 3:4-5: But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of righteous things we have done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit.We come from different “pumpkin patches,” with different kinds of dirt on us, but all of us had to be cleaned up by Jesus, didn’t we? Think of what you were before Jesus brought you in from the patch. Think of where you would be without him.
I've noticed that a lot of people I meet and talk with are truly handicapped over the missing pieces in their lives. Whatever it is that is not there in their life's puzzle, they have become obsessed with it, it controls their thought life, and it keeps them from enjoying or appreciating the good things they do have. What about you? Would that be true of you?I remember talking with a friend who had been married quite a few years, and had always wanted children, but she had not been able to have her own. That's a painful missing piece, and she was sharing the pain with me. But even though she recognized that an important piece was missing, she hastened to add: "But, Mary, I have so much to be thankful for. My life is still full and meaningful," and she began to recite the good things—the pieces that are not missing from her life.I said to her, "Do you realize how unusual you are? While you acknowledge that a key piece is missing from your life, and is likely to always be missing, you are focused on what is not missing.” I can tell you that she never moaned and groaned about this missing piece. While she felt sorrow and pain over it, she accepted that no one has everything, and life is full of missing pieces.Have the missing pieces of your life become so overwhelming that you cannot see or appreciate what you do have? For ten years I allowed what I thought was a major missing piece in my life to control me. I felt that I had to be married for life to be complete, so I was consumed with pursuing and finding the right person to marry. I've shared my testimony many times before of how that obsession with finding the missing piece led me away from the Lord, away from biblical principles, into a life that was self-focused and sinful.What I've come to learn—and am still learning—is that instead of being controlled by the missing pieces, I can be thankful for them. If that sounds a little "too good to be true," let me assure you that I don't live on another planet and I have the same feelings and emotions and struggles as everyone else. And I emphasize that I am learning this principle of being thankful for the missing pieces. But as I've started to grasp this truth, I've found such freedom and contentment.I'd like to share a poem with you, which really helped me start down this road of being thankful for the missing pieces. I first read it several years ago, and I re-read it quite often; I have it written in my prayer book as a reminder of this important biblical principle, to be thankful for the missing pieces. The poem uses old-fashioned words, but the truth is still very relevant:An easy thing, O power Divine,To thank Thee for these gifts of Thine!For summer's sunshine, winter's snow,For hearts that kindle, thoughts that glow;But when shall I attain to this:To thank Thee for the things I miss? For all young fancy's early gleams,The dreamed-of joys that still are dreams,Hopes unfulfilled, and pleasures knownThrough others' fortunes, not my own,And blessings seen that are not given,And ne'er will be - this side of heaven. Had I, too, shared the joys I see,Would there have been a heaven for me?Could I have felt Thy presence nearHad I possessed what I held dear?My deepest fortune, highest bliss,Have grown, perchance, from things I miss. Sometimes there comes an hour of calm;Grief turns to blessing, pain to balm;A Power that works above my willStill leads me onward, upward still;And then my heart attains to this:To thank Thee for the things I miss.-Thomas Wentworth HigginsonWhen I first read this poem, I began to ask myself, "Where would you be today if you had everything you wanted, if there were no missing pieces in your life?” And it was as though God drew back a curtain to let me see how having everything I wanted could have been disastrous for me. Why?
If I told you I was an heir of a very wealthy person—say Elon Musk, the richest man in the world—would you be impressed? That would mean I would be in line to get lots of money. Well, the truth is, I have more impressive credentials than that. When you and I are born from above through faith in Christ, our identity is truly incredible. Don’t forget that:You are an heir of God and co-heir with Christ.That’s what we read in Romans 8. If you're an heir of God, that means you're in line to inherit God's riches. And if you're a co-heir with Christ, that means you'll inherit equally with Christ of the Father's great riches. When you ask yourself "Who am I?", and the answer comes back "An heir of God and co-heir with Christ," then you have to say, "I have value."If you are indeed born from above, if you and Jesus have a personal one-on-one relationship based on faith in him and repentance from you sins, then you've got the God of heaven and earth counting the hairs of your head, putting your tears in his jar, opening the door to his throne for you to enter whenever you please. Are you somebody? How much more important and significant can you be?When you focus on who you are in Christ and his power in you, then you can have victory over the old self-images and inadequacies and the way you've seen yourself all these years. You can know freedom from that.So, please, don’t forget who you are. Let go of the old self-images that have been based on wrong information. Know who you are in Christ according to the Word of God, and just keep remembering it. Tell yourself who you are in Christ. Reprogram your mind to get rid of the old tapes which are Satan’s lies, and program the truth of who you are in Christ and because of Christ.(Click here to download the devotional for the entire week.)
If someone asks you, “Who are you?” what do you say? Your answer to that question is important, because having a firm understanding of who you are is critical to your ability to be all that God has created you to be. I’m looking to Scripture for a clear understanding of our identity when we are born from above. We are God’s intentional creation, we were created for his pleasure and his glory, and when you come to saving faith in Christ, the great news is:You are a new creation.In 2 Corinthians 5:17 we read:Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here! The day that you recognized your sinful state before God and accepted his Son as your own personal Savior, that very day you were transformed into a new creation. Now, this new person that you have become because of Jesus Christ is someone you can feel good about.This new person is righteous. Not self-righteous, because in ourselves, the Bible says, all our self-righteousness is like filthy rags to God. But Philippians 3:9 tells us that we have a righteousness now which comes through faith in Christ, not a righteousness of our own. The righteousness of Jesus Christ is credited to you and God sees you wrapped up in his righteousness.And here’s more wonderful news about who you are in Christ:You are no longer under condemnation.Romans 8 tells us that the new person has been set free from the law of sin and death. It says you are no longer condemned for what that old person is or was. You're free! There's no condemnation against you! Good news! Great news! Incredible news! Feel good about yourself; you should.You know, when you intentionally remember who you are in Christ and because of Christ, it truly makes a difference in the way you face life, the way you face the day ahead. Regardless of what’s going on in your life, what other people think of you, even what you think of yourself, if you remember who you are, it will give you strength and encouragement. So don’t forget: You are a new creation in Christ and you are no longer under condemnation.
We all recognize that a strong self-image is important to us. Knowing who we are and why we’re here is a foundation that is really necessary for living a fulfilled life. I’m pointing out from Scripture just who you are if you are connected to God through faith in Jesus Christ.We’ve seen that we are God’s intentional creation, we were created for his pleasure, and now, don’t forget that:You were created for his glory.Here are a few verses from that Isaiah 43:1-7:But now, this is what the Lord says - he who created you...he who formed you...'Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine...I am the Lord, your God...you are precious and honored in my sight, because I love you...everyone who is called by my name, I created for my glory....We admire the paintings of great artists because of their beauty and creativity. But who gets the glory for the painting? The artist, of course. We don’t give the painting credit; rather we say, "This artist is wonderful; this artist is great.” The masterpiece brings glory to the artist.That's why you and I are here—to bring glory to our Creator. Maybe you're thinking, "But Mary, there's no way that I can glorify God because my life is a mess. You just don't know all the mistakes I've made, all the things I've done wrong. My past is too awful for me to be able to bring glory to God."Ah, but don't you see, the less he has to work with, the more God gets the glory for the workmanship! And he is masterful at taking ashes and turning them into beauty. He is incredible at transforming ruined lives into testimonies of his greatness.When your life has been transformed by the power of Jesus Christ, you bring glory to God. Don’t forget, you were created for God’s glory.
As Christ-followers, those who have been born from above, our identity is found in our relationship to God the Father through Jesus Christ. We saw that we are God’s intentional creation, created by him and for him. Now, consider this:You were created for his pleasure.Remember the wonderful movie, Chariots of Fire, the story of that remarkable Olympic champion, the Scottish runner, Eric Liddle, who was a strong Christian committed to Jesus Christ. His missionary sister was concerned about his running career because she felt he was neglecting his calling and not putting God first. But Eric said to his sister, "Oh, don't you see, Jenny. God made me fast and when I run, I give God pleasure.”He got it! He understood that God took pleasure in him. I love this verse from Zephaniah 3:17:“The Lord your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves. He will take great delight in you; in his love he will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing.”Don't you love that imagery of God rejoicing over you with singing? We often rejoice and take delight in God through singing, but to think that he does the same over us. God takes pleasure in you. You should be able to verbalize how God has created you to bring him pleasure. Maybe you would say: "Because God made me a good listener, I bring God pleasure when I listen and care about others.” Or "Because God made me a good organizer, I bring God pleasure when I organize events and run them smoothly.” Or "Because God made me a speaker, I bring God pleasure when I give a good talk or make a good presentation.”It really doesn't matter how God has created you; we are all very different in our gifts and abilities. But we were all created for his pleasure. It is not pride on your part to recognize how God has created you. Eric Liddle gave God the credit for his fast body, but he also recognized that it was a gift from God to bring God pleasure.Don’t forget who you are! You were created for God’s pleasure.
Who are you? This is a very important question, but often we have the wrong answers. Even those of us who are born from above, who are dedicated to the Lord Jesus Christ, all too often let the world shove us into its mold and we define ourselves by the wrong criteria.I did that for many years, and it led to an emotional roller coaster ride, to a self-focused life, and to a sinful lifestyle. It might be the cause of a great deal of the pain and struggle you are having in your life right now. If you're unhappy with who you are, wishing you were like other people, feeling cheated because you don't have what you want, feeling guilty because you haven't lived up to other's expectations or your own, it's highly likely you've fallen into this trap of identifying yourself incorrectly. You don't really know who you are.I want to go to Scripture to show you who you are in Christ, just in case you’ve forgotten or maybe you never knew.You are God's intentional creation.You are not an accident of nature or a mistake your parents made. In Colossians 1:16 we read:For in him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things have been created through him and for him.You were not just created by him, but for him! The depth of this truth is life-changing. You and I were created by the Almighty God, and we were created for him—for his purposes, for his reasons. That knowledge alone brings significance into our lives.A dear friend who is now with Jesus came to saving faith as an adult, and I’ll never forget how this truth transformed her life. Her mother had told her all her life that she was accident—an unplanned birth—and her birth had complicated her mother’s life. So, coming to know Jesus meant she finally understood that she was not an accident. She was created by God for his purpose.And that’s true for you as well. So, don’t forget who you are today! You are God’s intentional creation—his handiwork.
Let me start with quoting this admonition from God’s Word:1 Peter 5:5b-6: God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble. Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time.Luke 14:11: For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.Notice that there are promises given in these two passages for those who are willing to humble themselves. They will be lifted up and they will be exalted. No doubt the average person would not connect being humble with being lifted up and exalted, but this is the upside-down truth for us as followers of Christ. Living for Jesus is often swimming upstream as to what our culture would tell us. Frequently we are called to live counter-cultural lives but it’s not a call to a dreadful life or a weird life. It’s a call to be lifted; to find true lasting joy and even to be exalted, as Jesus told us.We typically think that God is the one who exalts or humbles us. If we’re humbled or if we’re exalted, we think it will be God who does it. But Jesus said we must humble ourselves.Have you ever intentionally tried to humble yourself? Is that something on your to-do list? “Today I will humble myself?” Very few Christians ever take this literally and seriously. But there is great benefit for those who do. In addition to being lifted up and exalted, here are some further promises for those who humble themselves: God gives you grace. James 4:6: “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble” (ESV). God guides the humble in what is right and teaches them his way. Psalm 25:9: He leads the humble in what is right, and teaches the humble his way (ESV). God crowns the humble with salvation. Psalm 149:4: For the Lord takes pleasure in his people; he adorns the humble with salvation (ESV). With humility comes wisdom. Proverbs 11:2: When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with the humble is wisdom (ESV). You will be greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven. Matthew 18:4: Whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven (ESV).So, for all kinds of good reasons we should learn how to humble ourselves. But how do we do that? How do we humble ourselves when our natural instincts are to be number one? How do we humble ourselves when we fear that others will take advantage of us if we are humble? What does it mean to humble yourself and how do you do it?First, let’s consider what it does NOT mean to be humble: It does not mean that you walk around with your head hung low, looking pitiful. It does not mean that you run yourself down. It does not mean that you cannot be ambitious or successful. It does not mean that you can’t be the best at what you do. It does not mean that you can never be number oneFurthermore, humility and ambition can co-exist very nicely. Look at some people in the Bible who were ambitious: Abraham was ambitious to go to a land where God was sending him, and God calls him the father of our faith. Noah was ambitious to build an ark that took over one hundred years to complete. David was ambitious to defeat Goliath. Esther was ambitious to save her people from extinction. Ruth was ambitious to save her mother-in-law and herself. Jesus was ambitious to do the Father’s will. The Apostle Paul was ambitious to spread the Gospel throughout the world.Without ambitions and goals and visions, we don’t do anything—we perish! It’s not wrong to be ambitious and want to succeed. Here are three reasons every Christian should have great ambitions: We are created by God and from the beginning God had a plan for his creation. He told Adam to “Fill the earth and subdue it.” That is definitely ambitious. Jesus told us, his followers, to go into all the world and make disciples. That is an ambition every believer should take seriously. Paul wrote to the Ephesians that we are God’s workmanship,
Trying to find the right balance as a Christian woman is certainly a major challenge for most of us. I find that I must fight not to be caught up in what others think I should be. Rather I want to focus on the characteristics of a godly woman, and as Proverbs 31:30 tells us, a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.We should not fear: What people say or think about usFrankly, that can be a hard one for us women, because our natures are often inclined to be people-pleasers, and we will do most anything to avoid rejection. So, we can easily care too much about what people say or think.Sometimes I find myself fearful of looking irrelevant because I have aspirations and beliefs that are not in sync with the norm for women today. Let's face it—we like to think of ourselves as sophisticated and “cool.” And quite honestly, there are times when I feel like the country-bumpkin, even among some Christian women who seem to be more "in tune" than I am.But I have to keep going back to who I am—a woman who wants to please God. That means, I must fear the Lord, and not fear looking dumb or backwards. If we live godly lives in this society, we're going to look weird at times. Be prepared for it. And ask God to help you not to fear what people say or think.That also means I must not fear: What people can do to me.A boss can fire you, a boyfriend or husband can leave you, a child can disobey you, a parent can disappoint you, a friend can be disloyal to you. There are many things that people can do to you, and if you live in fear of those things, your life will be a constant emotional roller-coaster. Remember, no one can separate you from the love of Jesus, and as long as they cannot do that, then we don't have to live in fear of what people can do."Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord will be praised.” Let's make that our goal in life, to be a woman who fears the Lord.(Click here to download the devotional for the entire week.)
What are you fearful of today? Did you know that we should be women of fear? The Proverbs 31 woman is described as a "woman who feared the Lord" and she was praised. This is the most important lesson we can learn from this ideal woman. Are you a woman who fears the Lord?If so, there are some specific things you will fear, and one of those is: The fear of getting off on some issue and losing the right focusOne of the things that I fear greatly is getting out of balance and becoming an issue-oriented woman instead of a God-fearing woman. It would be very easy to do in this society with my personality, believe me. And I fear it, because I know that is one way Satan gets his foot in our doors.Many women in the last couple of generations have focused their lives and energies on righting all the wrongs done to women. To be sure there have been and still are discriminatory practices in our culture—including Christian institutions—which can be criticized, which should be changed, and which are not fair. And we may have some opportunities to try to effect some of those needed changes. That's fine in its proper place.But for us to become issue-oriented on women's rights so that the issue is more important to us than anything else is to be shoved into the world's mold of fighting for your rights. I keep reminding myself that the only way I can really help any woman is to point her to Jesus, who can free her from her sins and give her peace. Then she'll be free indeed.Paul wrote to the Romans that we are all slaves either of sin or of Christ. So instead of being in bondage to some issue, or becoming obsessive about fighting for our rights, I want to encourage women—and everyone else—to become slaves of righteousness, because when we die to ourselves we find life in Christ. I could help further the cause of women's rights 'til I'm blue in the face, and any progress made would be useless if the women are still slaves to sin.I want to fear not hearing the Lord say to me, "Well done, good and faithful servant," for I will stand before him someday for my life's work to be judged. I fear wasting the time and energy I have on things and issues that are not of eternal significance. That is godly fear.
No matter who you are, how qualified or successful you may or may not be, if you are a woman who fears the Lord, you will be praised. That was the heart of this remarkable woman—she feared the Lord, and we can do that, too.If we truly fear the Lord, we will fear bringing disgrace to his name. Another holy fear is Causing any kind of dissension or disunity in the body of ChristPaul wrote to the Romans: "If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone" (Rom. 12:18). And Jesus told us to love one another as he has loved us. "By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another" (John 13:35).Are you fearful of causing bad feelings among your friends and fellow believers? That is a godly fear, and we need to cultivate that kind of fear. That loose gossip which we tolerate in our lives, those unkind words we say to each other, that competitive spirit and malice which is evident in the way we treat each other—those are things we should fear greatly.If you have bad feelings right now toward someone, would you start praying about that and ask God what he wants you to do about it? He may want you to go to that person and ask for forgiveness and have your fellowship restored. If so, please don't put it off. The longer you wait, the heavier that burden will be. Until you make things right between you and others, you'll never be the godly woman you want to be.Is your fear of people stronger than your fear of the Lord? If you really fear the Lord, it will be more important to you to get your relationships right than it will be to save face with your friends or family. Maybe you're fearing rejection by others, and that keeps you from restoring fellowship with them. But ask God to give you a holy fear—the fear of the Lord—which will be stronger than your fear of people, so that you can do what he wants you to do."Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” Keep repeating this verse over and over to yourself and ask God to make you a woman who fears the Lord.
"Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” You probably recognize that verse from the famous 31st chapter of Proverbs, which describes a godly woman. The one thing that made this woman significant was that she feared the Lord.I want to be a godly woman, and I'm sure you do, too. So, how do we become a woman who fears the Lord? What does that mean? This fear is reverential awe—a fear that comes from knowing enough about God to be in awe of his power, his holiness, his sovereignty. An awe that springs from love and devotion.First, let's talk about what we should fear if we fear the Lord. I should fear bringing any kind of disgrace to the name of Jesus.Psalm 69:6 is a prayer of David's which I have written in my prayer journal and I pray often:"May those who hope in you not be disgraced because of me, God of Israel; may those who seek you not be put to shame because of me.” Do you fear doing something that will cause the name of Jesus to be dishonored? That is a godly fear; it is the fear of the Lord.We've seen many times over, both in public and private arenas, where Christians have strayed morally and ethically, and brought disgrace to the name of the Lord. I have a great fear of doing that and I hope I always will.Why am I fearful of bringing disgrace to the name of the Lord? One, because I know how weak I am and how easy it would be for me to fall. That's true of all of us. Two, because the thought of breaking his heart through a moral failure breaks my heart. And third, because I know I would lose so much; my ministry and freedom to serve the Lord would be greatly impacted if I brought disgrace to his name.When you have a holy fear of bringing disgrace to God's name, you will watch the way you live very closely. No temporary thrill can entice you to pay this awful price, when you truly fear the Lord as you should.
Have you ever read Proverbs 31 and felt like quitting? I get tired when I read about the superwoman pictured in that famous last chapter of Proverbs. What woman can live up to this ideal?Well, I'm encouraged to realize that this is most likely not the description of a specific woman, but a picture of the characteristics of a godly woman. And if you will focus on verse 30 of that chapter, you will be encouraged:Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.The beauty of this Proverbs 31 woman is that she feared the Lord. Her central focus was not to please people, not to set new records, not to prove she could do anything she wanted to, not to fight for her rights, but it was to fear the Lord. If you and I want to be like this ideal woman, then what we must learn to do is fear the Lord, because then we will be women to be praised by God.Any woman can be a woman who fears the Lord if she chooses to. There may be many things you cannot do, many avenues that will never be open to you, many mountains you'll never climb, many awards you'll never win. You may think you are insignificant compared to other women and what they do. But take heart today; you can be a woman to be praised if you will fear the Lord.Throughout time women have often been characterized as deceptive and manipulative, and physical beauty has always been the world's way of measuring a woman. But when I read that charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, it tells me that these shallow and non-durable characteristics—charm and beauty—are not God's criteria, and we are not bound by them.Women today are often very focused on being free from stereotypes and traditional roles. This Proverbs 31 woman found her freedom by fearing the Lord, and believe me, that's where we will find ours. Let me tell you, as one who has tried it both ways, true freedom comes when you commit yourself to be God's woman and make him the central focus of your life.What does it mean to be a woman who fears the Lord? Have you given that any thought?
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)What do you do when the hard days come?Several years ago, a friend recommended a book to me. I was eager to get it and start reading. When I cracked the book open and turned to the first page, the first three words were, “Life is difficult.” I didn’t know whether to throw the book across the room and regret paying $14.99 or to keep reading and risk being bummed out for the remaining 243 pages. Who starts a book with “life is difficult?” But it’s the truth isn’t it? Life is difficult. You will have hard days, weeks, months…. sometimes years. Maybe you are having one now. Maybe you are in a long season of “difficult” and you see no end in sight.Maybe you are experiencing the pain and loneliness of singleness. You feel isolated and alone. Or, your kid is struggling and you don’t know what to do. Your marriage is on the rocks and it seems irreparable. Perhaps you are experiencing the repercussions of poor choices. Maybe it's job loss. Sickness. Deafening silence in a broken friendship, heartbreak or the demands of a job that are overwhelming. Financial troubles. Depression. Anxiety. Aging parents. Facing your own mortality.What do you do when life just seems hard to bear? As a friend of mine says, “Life is complex and messy, sometimes brutally so, but…… there is a way to look at the mess.” How do you live in the “but?” How do we live in the mess with the lens of heaven?It will take disciplining your thoughts. It will take trust in God, and oftentimes it takes sheer determination to remember and hold onto truth. It will take courage, the state of mind and belief that enables you to face difficulty and pain. With the shield of faith and the belief in God’s nearness and faithfulness, over the filter of fear.It will take resisting the temptation to deconstruct your faith when life is hard and take the disappointment and pain as a cue to lean into Jesus. When you are in pain or doubt, it can be tempting to run from the only source of comfort and trade God in for manmade gods. To be lured away from standing firm and lulled by things you think will bring comfort and relief but are only temporary and will never fulfill the deepest longing of your soul that only Jesus Christ can fill. Instead of lashing out and running away from God, how do we remember to cry out to Jesus and run towards him?It doesn’t take long to realize the multitude of examples of the men and women in the Bible whose stories tell us how they faced major trials in their lives, and how God proved himself faithful every single time. We need these stories as reminders because sometimes in the midst of our own pain, we forget. That is why as a follower of Jesus it is absolutely essential that you are in the Word of God, daily. God’s Word is what renews your mind and reminds you of what is true. There are so many things vying for your attention and affection on a daily basis, it can be easy to be pulled off track. It can be easy to forget God’s character. It can be all too tempting to fail to remember his faithfulness. In order to acknowledge that “life is complex and messy, sometimes brutally so, but…”. In order to live in the “but” we need to look at the Word of God. We need to remember the character of God. Because the world and your circumstances will scream loudly at you. Tempting you to turn away in defeat and forget.One story that you may be familiar with is the story of Job. Now, before you have an allergic reaction to the word Job like I have in the past, hang with me because I promise you when you read and understand Job’s story in the way God intended, you will be encouraged in the midst of whatever struggle you are facing. The story of Job seems so complex yet so poignant. The story ultimately and beautifully displays the sovereignty of God in the midst of suffering.Before we look at Job’s story there is a quote from A.W. Tozer that has always stuck with me that I want to share with you.
What would amaze Jesus Christ? Well, there are only two occasions where we're told that Jesus was amazed. Jesus was amazed at the faith of the Roman Centurion who asked him to heal his servant. He had great faith in Jesus even though he had little teaching or knowledge of our Lord.In Mark 6 we see where Jesus was again amazed, but for different reasons. He was in his hometown of Nazareth, teaching in the synagogue. But those who heard him couldn't believe that he was the Son of God because this was their home-town boy, the carpenter's son. So instead of believing in him, they took offense at him. And because of their unbelief, Jesus could not do many miracles there. And again we're told that Jesus was amazed at their lack of faith.Here are people who should have known who Jesus was. He was a fulfillment of all their prophecies, and he had demonstrated his power to them many times. But Jesus didn't suit their notions of what the Messiah should be like, and their stubborn, proud hearts kept them from believing what was right in front of their noses. And Jesus was amazed at their lack of faith. He left there and went elsewhere.I wonder if Jesus is amazed at my faith or at yours? Is he amazed that you have faith in him, regardless of the circumstances, regardless of the prospects, even without complete understanding? Do you amaze him with your consistent faith in him and what he can do? Or rather, is he amazed to see that in spite of all you know and all the experience you've had, your faith is still weak and anemic?Recently someone said, "Faith is not only believing a certain thing will happen. Faith is turning everything over to the Lord and trusting him with what happens, knowing that he will bring to pass what he knows to be best." I want to have that kind of faith that will trust to him every situation, every circumstance, unquestioningly and without hesitation. I want some amazing faith, don't you?(Click here to download the devotional for the entire week.)
Recently I realized there were only two occasions in Scripture where we're told that Jesus was amazed. Do you know what they are?The first occasion is recorded in Luke 7, which is the story of the Roman Centurion who asked Jesus to heal his sick servant. Roman soldiers were characteristically hard, tough men, with little compassion or concern for others, certainly not for servants. We would expect this man to be ruthless and uncaring, so we cannot help but be impressed that he would care about a servant, and that he would be willing to come to Jesus on his behalf. This man was truly humble.Also, he had been very generous with the Jewish people who were under his command, and had built them a synagogue, though he was not himself a Jew. This was indeed an unusual man.What is really amazing is his profound comprehension of who Jesus was. As Jesus was going to his home to heal his servant, the soldier sent friends to say to him, "Lord, don't trouble yourself, for I do not deserve to have you come under my roof. That is why I did not even consider myself worthy to come to you. But say the word, and my servant will be healed” (Luke 7:6b-7).Here was a Roman soldier that somehow knew the power and authority that Jesus had. In addition, he was a truly humble man, feeling unworthy for Jesus to even enter his home. He showed great faith in Jesus, believing that he could heal his servant by just speaking a word, without even seeing the servant.And when Jesus heard this, we're told that he was amazed at him. In fact, Jesus said, "I tell you, I have not found such great faith, even in Israel” (Luke 7:9b). Jesus was amazed at his faith.He was amazed at the depth of his faith, and at his persistent in seeking Jesus. Surely it was not considered smart for a man in his position to believe in this itinerant, controversial Jewish preacher. Yet he unashamedly goes to Jesus for help.He had amazing faith. I would like to have that kind of faith - the kind that amazes Jesus, wouldn't you?
Humility and success are not exclusives. Indeed, humility can accelerate our learning curve and enhance our people skills and contribute to our success in any area of our lives. But how do we acquire true humility?We've talked about how true humility can be a great asset for us in the business world, because it causes us to be more teachable and more respectful of others. But the question I always ask is "How do I acquire true humility?" It seems very elusive for me at times.Well, in 1 Peter 5 we're told to humble ourselves. What are some specific things we can do to humble ourselves?First, we can learn to be better listeners and truly care about what other people have to say. James says to be quick to listen and slow to speak, and that would surely be a good way to learn to humble ourselves.Second, we can make a list of the areas in our lives that need some work and ask God to help us make the needed changes. I always need to be more patient, and I can learn to humble myself if I will continually concentrate on putting on patience.A third way to humble yourself is not to talk about yourself all the time, even when you have an opportunity. When we talk about ourselves a lot, we easily get into bragging and trying to make ourselves look good.Fourth, we can humble ourselves by asking others to give us any input that would help us to improve. Have you ever done that with your boss or a coworker? They may be able to offer some suggestions about your performance that could be very helpful. It takes a little courage, but it surely is one way to humble yourself.Jesus said that whoever humbles himself or herself is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven, and he described himself as gentle and humble in heart. Therefore, there is great gain for us in learning to humble ourselves. The most important result is that it makes our lives more pleasing to our Lord. The side benefit is that it enhances our opportunity for success in anything we undertake.I challenge you, therefore, to decide to humble yourself and discover that humility and success are very compatible attributes.
Are humility and success compatible? I believe they are not only compatible, but true humility can enhance our success. It may sound contradictory, but I think you'll find it's true.We talked about the fact that humility is not generally viewed as a necessary characteristic for the successful career person. But true humility is indeed very helpful. Consider the characteristics of truly humble people.First of all, they are teachable. They don't have a "know-it-all" attitude. They recognize that they can learn from others and that they don't have all the answers. They are open to suggestions and constructive criticism.Now, I can tell you that those characteristics are extremely useful in any business environment. The person who is continually looking for ways to improve and is willing to learn from others will grow and improve much faster than the ones who think they know all there is to know.The person who is truly humble is one who gives respect to other people and does not have an arrogant or condescending attitude toward others. The Apostle Paul said in Philippians to consider others better than ourselves. In other words, true humility is when we continually remind ourselves of the importance of other people, when we try to daily practice compassion and have empathy for others.Again, this attribute is very well received in business circles. How often do you hear someone say, "They have really good people skills." Well, good people skills is another way of saying they treat people with respect and fairness, and they are considerate of their feelings and their needs. That is recognized in business today as a very desirable trait for a good manager.And true humility gives us that kind of attitude toward people. It truly helps us develop good people skills, and therefore makes us better prepared for success.Humility and success are very compatible, and as Christians in the marketplace, we'll find that striving to be truly humble will enhance our skills and our performance on the job.
In the Bible we're frequently told that we should be humble, but humility doesn't seem to be the way to get ahead in this world. How can a Christian be humble and still be successfulIf you’re looking in bookstores or online for books to help you be successful, you'll find titles like Winning Through Intimidation, but I doubt you'll find a book entitled Finding Success through Humility. That wouldn't be a best seller, because humility is viewed as a liability rather than an asset in the business-world and elsewhere.Well, where does that leave those who are Christians trying to make a living in the world's business environment? Is the Bible's challenge for us to humble ourselves, as Jesus said, or to wear humility, as we read in Colossians 3, compatible with our desires to succeed in our careers?I believe the answer to that question is yes when we understand the real meaning of humility. What most people think of when they talk about being humble is not the real meaning of the term, but rather a false humility.Have you ever met someone who acted very humble but somehow you just didn't feel it was sincere? That kind of false humility never impresses anyone and gives humility a bad name. When we try to demonstrate our humility, then it's pretty certain we don't have it!For example, refusing to accept compliments graciously is not real humility. Saying degrading things about yourself is not a sign of humility. Refusing to accept rewards or recognition for what you've accomplished is not a sign of humility.Humility is a natural outcome of learning who we are in comparison to who God is. When we are in a life-long process of constantly learning that everything we are and everything we do is because of who God is, then humility becomes a natural characteristic. But it does not make us into a door mat nor does it keep us from achieving goals and ambitions. Indeed, true humility helps us in the business world.
The Bible makes it clear that the name of Jesus is to be honored and respected above all other names. In Philippians 2:9-11 we read:Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.The President of the United States is called President, Leader of the Free World, Commander in Chief of the Armed Forces, Head of a Political Party—and other titles that are given to him because he was elected President. Those titles represent his authority in various areas. Similarly, but in a much more important way, Jesus has been given names by God the Father that represent his authority, and as Christ-followers, we have access to the power of his name.I want to focus on five of the many names in the Bible that describe Jesus and I want to encourage you as a Christ-follower to claim his name for whatever need you are facing—to “claim the name.”Immanuel – God with UsIn Isaiah 7:14 we read that the Messiah will be called Immanuel, which means “God with us.” This is a name of Jesus you can claim.This means that in the midst of whatever you’re facing, you stop and claim the truth that Jesus is “God with you.” You are not alone. He will never leave you or forsake you. It means that in the middle of your pity party, when you are feeling sorry for yourself because you’re facing something all alone and you feel as though nobody cares, you can claim the name of Immanuel and know that God is with you.For those times when you feel forsaken or abandoned, when all your friends seem to have vanished, when the person closest to you doesn’t seem to understand what you’re going through, learn to tap into the power in the name of Jesus Immanuel—God with you. It’s true, but you must claim it for yourself—claim the name of Jesus Immanuel today and be encouraged because God is with you.Wonderful CounselorOur lives are full of decision points, forks in the road where the choice we make will have some significant impact in our lives. How do you make good decisions? How can you be sure that you’re choosing the right path?One of the most wonderful names given to Jesus is found in Isaiah 9:6 which says, “he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.” In that one verse we have four of the incredible names given to our Lord, and at the top of the list is Wonderful Counselor.What is the role of a counselor? It is to give guidance and trustworthy advice, right? So, as you’re facing some important decisions today, have you gone for counsel to Jesus, or are you just trying to figure it out on your own? His name is Wonderful Counselor—the best Counselor. Have you claimed the name of Jesus for the guidance that you need?I well remember some years ago when I was facing a dilemma in my life, one that looked potentially dire and where the wrong decision could be catastrophic. I knew I needed good advice, so what did I do? I called my best friend, who just wasn’t available to me at that moment. I kept dialing and re-dialing her number to no avail, and I actually became irritated at her for not being there when I needed her. And as I paced the floor in frustration, trying to reach my friend, so clearly the Lord reminded me that Jesus is my Wonderful Counselor. He is the one I needed to turn to first and fast, because his guidance is perfect.So, I stopped and claimed the name of Jesus—Wonderful Counselor—and took the whole situation to him in prayer. He calmed my spirit and assured me that he would guide my steps through this situation and I could trust him. After all, he’s not like any other counselor—those who can be mistaken; instead he is my wonderful, perfect Counselor.I want to encourage you today, as you’re facing some decision point,
As we continue looking to 2 Chronicles 20 as our guide we see the final weapon in King Jehosaphat’s battle plan: Praise and Worship.Jehosaphat has just cried out to God asking him what to do, God answers, and immediately we see that Jehosaphat and all Judah and the inhabitants of Jerusalem bowed down before the Lord and worshiped him and the Levites stood up to praise the Lord God shouting with a loud voice. When in the midst of a battle the people put themselves in a posture of worship and praise.Sometimes the last thing we feel like doing when we are faced with a battle is to worship God. Yet this is the very thing that brought victory and the very thing that God invites you to when you are feeling the heat of pending defeat. As my friend Becky says, turn your panic into praise!2 Chronicles 20:20-22 continues:“Early in the morning they left for the Desert of Tekoa. As they set out, Jehoshaphat stood and said, “Listen to me, Judah and people of Jerusalem! Have faith in the Lord your God and you will be upheld; have faith in his prophets and you will be successful.” After consulting the people, Jehoshaphat appointed men to sing to the Lord and to praise him for the splendor of his holiness as they went out at the head of the army, saying: “Give thanks to the Lord, for his love endures forever.”As they began to sing and praise, the Lord set ambushes against the men of Ammon and Moab and Mount Seir who were invading Judah, and they were defeated.”Praise is what defeated the enemy.This reminds me of one of my favorite worship songs.“I raise a hallelujah, in the presence of my enemies.I raise a hallelujah, louder than the unbelief.I raise a hallelujah, my weapon is a melody.I raise a hallelujah, Heaven comes to fight for me.I raise a hallelujah, with everything inside of me.I raise a hallelujah, I will watch the darkness flee.I raise a hallelujah, in the middle of the mystery.I raise a hallelujah, fear you lost your hold on me!”When you are facing life’s battles, your weapon is a melody.Praise God in the middle of the battle. Praise Jesus in the middle of the storm.(Click here to download the devotional for the entire week.)
What do you do when you are facing a battle? When it feels like the odds are against you? When it seems like the enemy is winning?When you are in a battle it can be easy to feel alone, surrounded on all sides, not knowing what to do. This week I have been talking about steps to creating a battle plan when you are experiencing hardships in life. I want to encourage you to remember that God is with you in the battle.In 2 Chronicles 20 when in the thick of the ensuing battle against Judah King Jehoshaphat calls out to God, “We are powerless before this vast number that comes to fight against us. We do not know what to do, but we look to you.” (2 Chronicles 20:12)Have you ever been in a situation where you had no clue what to do? Where did you turn? Who or what did you turn to? God wants you to know that when you ask him for help, when you look to him for guidance, he is with you, the Spirit of God will counsel you.When Jehosaphat looked to God, the Lord said, “Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast number, for the battle is not yours but God’s….. You do not have to fight this battle. Position yourselves, stand still, and see the salvation of the Lord….. Do not be afraid or discouraged. Go out tomorrow and face them, for Yaweh is with you” (2 Chronicles 20:15b-17).When you feel defenseless. When your back is against a wall, and you don’t know what to do. When fear, worry, and anxiety grip you, look to the Lord and position yourself towards God. Being aware of God’s presence is always the way to dispel fear in your life. How often do we take the battle into our own hands and try to fight back in our own strength when God says, “You do not have to fight this battle. Position yourself. Stand firm.”Ephesians 6:11-18a is another reminder of how we can take our stand against the enemy’s schemes and stand firm in the battle. The apostle Paul says, “Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests.”When you are in a battle, look to God, listen, position yourself before him, and stand firm.
Sometimes other people’s lives look so perfect as if they never face challenges and everything is always going right. But that is simply not true. We all face hardships in life. If you are currently in a battle, you are not alone.So the question is not if you will be in a battle the question is “when you are in a battle, what will you do?”2 Chronicles 20 reminds us that the first thing to do is seek the Lord. The second thing to do is to acknowledge God and pray and the next thing to do is cry out to God.Verse 9 says, “If calamity comes upon us, whether the sword of judgment, or plague or famine, we will stand in your presence before this temple that bears your Name and will cry out to you in our distress, and you will hear us and save us.”Do you know that you serve a God that listens?In Psalm 116:1-4, we hear the words of the Psalmist as he cries out to God in the midst of his own personal battle. “I love the Lord, for he heard my voice; he heard my cry for mercy. Because he turned his ear to me, I will call on him as long as I live. The cords of death entangled me, the anguish of the grave came over me; I was overcome by distress and sorrow. Then I called on the name of the Lord: “Lord, save me!”You can hear the absolute distress in the Psalmist’s voice. He is in utter despair. There is a lot of despair in the world these days. We can find ourselves in our own times of utter darkness and hopelessness. When disaster comes and it feels like life is caving in. In those moments when you are tired and weary and you feel like you are at your wits end. When you are not sure where to turn and you feel as though there is no way through your circumstances or no way out from under the weight of life, remember to cry out to God.Not too long ago I was experiencing a really big battle in my life. I felt confused, anxious, worried, and weary. I was desperately seeking to hear the Lord’s voice. Psalm 25:4-5 became a Psalm that I recited on a daily basis, “Show me your ways, Lord, teach me your paths. Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long.”Sometimes in the battle it will feel like a fight just to cry out to God. You can be tempted to turn to other things to distract you or to numb the pain. But remember to cry out to him. As a follower of Jesus, you have the privilege of a personal relationship with God and 24/7 access to him.
We all face battles in our lives, situations that are seemingly impossible, challenges that seem insurmountable. Times when our limited minds see no way around the conflict in front of us, or in us.What is your battle plan when you face difficulties in life?As we seek to formulate our own battle plan for challenges in life, we are looking to 2 Chronicles 20 for cues on how King Jehosaphat led in a battle that Judah, the southern kingdom of Israel, faced.The first thing Jehosaphat did when he was afraid in the battle was to seek the Lord and he also led his people to do the same. So when you are facing a battle the first part of your plan is, seek the Lord! The second step in Jehosaphat’s battle plan was to acknowledge God and pray.2 Chronicles 20:5-7 tells us,“Then Jehoshaphat stood up in the assembly of Judah and Jerusalem at the temple of the Lord in the front of the new courtyard and said:“Lord, the God of our ancestors, are you not the God who is in heaven? You rule over all the kingdoms of the nations. Power and might are in your hand, and no one can withstand you. Our God, did you not drive out the inhabitants of this land before your people Israel and give it forever to the descendants of Abraham your friend?”Don’t you just feel stronger already, hearing those powerful declarations about God?In the midst of the battle, Jehosaphat acknowledges who the Lord is and with confidence and boldness declares what is true about him, his character and his promises.I have to admit that sometimes when I am in a battle, I spend more energy staring at my circumstances and welling up with fear and anxiety rather than focusing on God.When you are in a battle do you recall and declare what is true about God? Can you easily call to mind the character of God and proclaim your courage in God?Courage is the state of mind and belief that enables you to face difficulty, fear, and pain because you know who fights your battles and who fights for you—the Lord!As a follower of Jesus, who you set your mind on and who you get your courage from determines your ability to experience victory in the battles you face.What truths about God do you need to remember? What character of God do you need to recall and declare, shout at the top of your lungs with confidence and courage, knowing the battle is not yours to fight. That the Lord is with you wherever you go. Power and might are in his hand and no one can stand against him which means he fights for you and no one or nothing can stand against you. Declare his faithfulness in the battle.
What do you do when you are in the midst of a battle? We all face battles in our lives, situations that are seemingly impossible or challenges that seem insurmountable. Times when our limited minds see no way around the conflict in front of us, or in us.We face battles in our marriage, in our thought life, at work, in our friendships, with our kids, financial battles, health battles, battles with addiction, emotional and mental battles.What is your battle plan when you face difficulties in life? How do you have courage in the battle?Let’s look at 2 Chronicles 20 and a battle that the southern kingdom of Israel, led by King Jehosaphat the fourth king of Judah, was facing for some cues. For a bit of a backstory, spiritually King Jehosaphat began his reign in a positive way, seeking the Lord, and leading his people to fear and follow God. But like many of the human kings we read about in the Old Testament, Jehosaphat had his shortcomings. Despite his misgivings we see how he led God’s people to victory when a vast number of their enemies were in hot pursuit to destroy them.There are five parts of his battle plan that are important as you prepare your plan for the battles you will face in your life. When faced with what appeared to be an insurmountable battle the first thing Jehosaphat did when he was afraid was that he resolved to seek the Lord. (2 Chronicles 20:3). He was determined and resolute to fix his eyes on and seek God.When you are afraid, what is your knee-jerk reaction? What or who do you give your first attention to?It can be easy to give in to fear and forget to seek God. It can be tempting to phone a friend and rely purely on human wisdom (which by the way - phoning a wise friend is a good idea). We just sometimes forget to seek the Lord and his wisdom. After all, the battle does not surprise him so you need to fix your eyes on Jesus.Jehosaphat also “proclaimed a fast for all Judah, who gathered to seek the Lord.” (2 Chronicles 20:3). Fasting is a spiritual discipline that helps you take your eyes off the things of this world and focus completely on God. It helps gain a new perspective and a renewed reliance upon God as you seek him for answers and direction.The next time you are facing a battle, resolve to seek the Lord first. Consider fasting as you enquire of the Lord and his wisdom for the road ahead.
I want to talk about stewardship and in particular, how we steward our choices. I want to talk about this is because I think when we think about how we steward our choices, it actually empowers us as leaders—in whatever capacity you're leading—to lead out of a God-given sense of self-worth.Now the church loves to talk about stewardship. We hear messages on how we steward our finances, how we steward our time, how we steward our resources. And these are really important things. But I can't tell you the last time, if ever, I heard a sermon on stewarding our choices.What I want to focus on is that this choice to function consistently out of a biblically defined understanding of our self-worth, particularly as it relates to our role as leaders, as women, it can have a profound impact on how we view and use our emotions; how we navigate boundaries, and it can actually enhance our ability for valuable risk-taking.But let's stop and think about this because let's be honest, choices stress us out. We face choices every day. I start off the day with “What am I going to wear?” “What am I going to look like when I head into my meetings?” And then I start thinking about “What am I going to eat for breakfast?” And some of you were probably thinking about “What am I going to feed my kids or spouse for breakfast?”And then I think about, “Okay, what tasks do I have to focus on at work today?” Because definitely there's no way I'm getting everything on my to do list done. And then I move onto, “I know we've got performance improvement plans coming up. So, do I need to let this person know what their outcome is going to be today? How is that going to make them feel? How's that going to make me feel?”I'm also a psychologist, and so I have clients that come into my office and they're wrestling with even bigger choices, things like “Should I stay in my marriage—even though my husband was selfish and cheated and doesn't act like he wants to be married anymore?” Or perhaps you're faced with a choice that says, “Do I follow this doctor's suggestion, or do I get a second opinion?”Choices are all around us. A huge part of my career is focused on helping people who get stuck in those choices. They're dealing with the consequence of perhaps past choices, or they're paralyzed with fear over future choices.And, you know, I think back to the Fall in Genesis. The Old Testament displays from the beginning of creation how God designed us to be gifted with the ability to choose. This was given to no other element of creation. And what did we do? We kind of messed it up.And the consequence is that our daily choices, the things that we have to choose, they leave us feeling pretty up in the air. We're not grounded. I think it is because just like Adam and Eve did, we're trying to build routes and choices that are pretty fleeting. Adam and Eve wanted to route themselves in the choice of knowledge instead of the truth of who they were in Christ, which was perfect image bearers of God. We miss this practice of navigating our lives from a launching point of the choice, the one choice that really, truly matters. And that's what is going to ground us in the midst of everything when everything around us feels like chaos.We have the choice to fully embrace and act out of a true definition of our self-worth. So how do you steward your choices? It's a big question. Because when we don't steward our choices, so often, we function from a place of trying to please other people to serve and to maybe sacrifice out of fear of being cast out, not included.And unfortunately, we oftentimes then find our lives in chaos. If you're in that circumstance, you might be asking yourself, “How do I remain grounded when my choices around me don't have me feeling confident?” Perhaps you are feeling uncertain, incapable, uncomfortable, and not grounded at all. But the reality is, God has given us a choice.
We have been given only one offensive weapon to use in this spiritual battle, but it is all we need. The Word of God is our sword (Ephesians 6:17). Paul said in 2 Corinthians 10:4 that "the weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds.”Remember how Jesus defeated Satan when he was tempted on the mountain. He quoted Scripture back to him, and though Satan tried three times to trick Jesus, he finally had to give up because the Word of God is far too powerful for him.Now let me ask you something. If Jesus had to use the Word of God to defeat Satan, how much more do we? You will remember also that the Word of God was in his head. He knew it and could recall it when he needed it. Does that give you some idea of how to use the Word of God as your sword? You need to know it to use it, and when you do, Satan has absolutely no defense against it.Here’s the thing: you need to wear all of this armor every day to stand against your enemy. I want to encourage you to start praying on each piece of the armor daily, before you leave home, so you're prepared for that enemy.So, pray on each day the belt of truth, the breastplate of righteousness, the shoes of peace, the helmet of salvation, the shield of faith and the sword of God's Word. I have learned to do this, and I find that it becomes that daily reminder and awareness of the battle I face and how important this armor is to my survival as an effective witness for Jesus Christ.I trust you will get very serious about putting on the armor of God on a daily basis, so that you are able to withstand the enemy's attack and be victorious.(Click here to download the devotional for the entire week.)
Another piece of that armor is the shield of faith (Ephesians 6:16). The Scripture says with this shield we can extinguish all the flaming missiles of the evil one. All of them, not just some of them. Do you know how to use the shield of faith against Satan?Taking the shield of faith is directly related to knowing God. The more you know him, the more you will trust him, and the more you trust him, the stronger will be your shield of faith.Do you know whom you have believed? Knowing God is all important. Sadly, many of us know more about our friends than we do about God. Until you pursue a knowledge of God, your shield of faith will be weak, and will not stand up against all those flaming missiles that your enemy is constantly throwing at you. You need faith, and faith comes as you get to know God.Faith also comes through exercise. When you trust God in a certain situation, and you see how he protects you, then the next time the enemy comes at you, your shield of faith is stronger because you remember the last time when you exercised faith, and God took care of you. Faith builds faith, but it has to begin by knowing God so that you believe he is trustworthy.Our next piece of armor is the helmet of salvation, which protects our head (Ephesians 6:17). We are all aware that our minds are vital to the health of our body, both physically and emotionally. The Bible tells us that we are what we think. Before anything happens outwardly, it has its beginnings in our mind.Little wonder that Satan makes his greatest effort to control our thinking. If he can capture your mind, he can control and destroy you. Without the helmet of salvation every day as your protection, you are defenseless.Protecting your mind with the salvation which comes from Christ means that you don't allow anything into your mind that contradicts or violates or offends that salvation. If you are not willing to carefully control what goes into your mind, and to make certain that you consistently fill your mind with good things, your mind will be unprotected and provide an easy target for your great enemy, Satan.So, put good things into your mind, and keeping the wrong things out. That will win your battle with Satan.
Do you get prepared for battle every day? Are you aware that, as a Christian, you are in a very real struggle with a most real enemy?Already we've talked about the belt of truth and the breastplate of righteousness, two important pieces of our armor from Ephesians 6. The next one is the gospel of peace to be worn on our feet (6:15). Did you ever wonder why peace is to be worn on your feet? Seems a little illogical, when you think about. I would have guessed that peace would be worn on our hearts. We think of having peace in our hearts. But instead we're told to put peace on our feet. Why?Well, you see, when you have peace on your feet, then nothing can stop you. Think about it: When your feet aren't properly protected or when your shoes are hurting you, it's hard to keep going, isn't it? If you're taking a hike, you don't put on shoes with three-inch heels. You wouldn't get very far in those shoes. If you are to run a race and finish it, you have to wear the right shoes.Well, peace is the boot you wear that will get you through anything. Peace on your feet protects you from the conditions of the path on which you are walking; you are no longer vulnerable to the surroundings or the environment. Doesn't matter where that road takes you—into a desert with burning sand, or through ice and snow, or in a lovely meadow with flowers and birds—if you're wearing the boots of peace you can keep going because your feet are protected.Fear debilitates us, incapacitates us, handicaps us, but peace frees us to keep on keepin' on. This is peace which passes all understanding, even your own. And Satan hates to see it in a Christian because those sandals of peace on your feet make you strong and give you endurance.Wearing peace on your feet also gives you a strong testimony in this troubled world. Have you been wearing the shoes of peace lately? You need to have them on to be prepared to fight an enemy who is out to get you. Pray on those shoes of peace; you shouldn't leave home without them.
Did you know that Christians are supposed to be fighters? Well, the truth is—we're in a daily battle, and we have an expert opponent—Satan.In Ephesians 6 we're told to put on the armor of God, the first piece of that armor was the belt of truth. The next one is the breastplate of righteousness (Ephesians 6:14). This is designed to protect an area of extreme vulnerability, our hearts, our feelings and emotions.One way Satan attacks our hearts is by telling us that we are total failures, and therefore we can never be worthy or do anything for God. We know from Revelation 12:10 that Satan is our accuser, and many times he succeeds in convincing Christians that they have no value because they have no righteousness of their own. He loves to bring up your past sin and keep you mired in your past, wounded in your heart.While it's true that we are unworthy in ourselves, what Satan does not want us to discover is that we have the righteousness of Jesus Christ available to us to wear as our breastplate. That's the secret: We wear the righteousness of Jesus Christ, not our own.I'm a big believer in talking back to our enemy, to remind him and ourselves that he is truly powerless over us. If you remember, that's how Jesus defeated Satan when he was tempted (Luke 4:1-13). So, when the enemy starts to attack you, talk back and use the Word of God. Say, "Wait a minute; you must not know who you're talking to. I'm a child of God; I have the righteousness of Jesus Christ as my breastplate. Therefore, no matter what you say about me, you're wrong. I'm a new person and you can no longer defeat me.Try it. Put on the breastplate of righteousness before you leave home each day, and all through the day remember to talk back to your enemy when he tries to destroy you through accusations.
If you're a Christian, do you realize that you are in a fight, a real war, every day of your life? Are you prepared for the fight that faces you?We know from Scripture that as Christians we have an enemy, and that enemy has one objective: to destroy us. He is ruthless and he knows how to fight and does it very well.In 1 Peter 5:8 (ESV) we read: "Your adversary, the devil, prowls about like a roaring lion seeking someone to devour.” In referring to Satan, Jesus said, "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy” (John 10:10 ESV).In the sixth chapter of Ephesians we find very explicit instructions on how to fight this enemy of ours. Paul clearly tells us that if we put on God's complete armor, we can successfully resist all the devil's methods of attack. Have you ever learned how to put on the armor of God? Do you do it on a daily basis? If you don't, you are going to war completely unprepared and headed for defeat.Let's look at each piece of this armor.The first part is a protective belt called truth (Ephesians 6:14). Since Satan is a liar and the father of lies, his favorite tactic is to lie to us, and he's very good at it. He will lie to you in your thought life, he will lie to you through what you hear and believe from other people, and through what you read and see. We must learn to detect his lies. The Word of God must become our testing station whereby we determine what is true and what is a lie from Satan.Satan loves to get us to rationalize our way into untruth. We put our human reasoning to work, coupled with our sinful nature and the lies of our culture, and the first thing you know we're justifying sinful behavior—such as lying, affairs, unethical behavior of all sorts. We justify ourselves with words like "But this is different.” Or "I really love him.” Or "I know God understands. . .” Friends, God never changes his mind and the Bible spells truth out very clearly. We have to know that truth and obey it in order to defeat our enemy.When there is any area of untruth in our lives, we are walking right into Satan's territory, and we're on our way to defeat. Have you told or done anything untruthful which needs to be set right? If so, do it today. Don't mess around in Satan's territory of lying. When you do, you cannot wear the belt of truth and without that belt, you are wide open to the enemy's lies.
This grasshopper disease came on the children of Israel when they were afraid to possess the land God had given them. They said "we look like grasshoppers" and they figured they couldn’t win the fight, so they wanted to quit and go back to Egypt. The disciples gave up on feeding the crowd of 5000 because they didn't have enough money or food. They caught the grasshopper disease, too. And you know what, you and I catch it from time to time, don’t we?But there's another servant of God who did the right thing when faced with his own crisis. We looked last week at 2 Chronicles 20 and the story of Jehoshaphat, king of Judah, who is facing a vast army and doomed for defeat. Instead of giving up, he called the people together and inquired of the Lord. I want to read now the prayer he prayed at that moment. It's found in 2 Chronicles 20:5-12."Then Jehoshaphat stood up in the assembly of Judah and Jerusalem at the temple of the Lord in the front of the new courtyard and said:“Lord, the God of our ancestors, are you not the God who is in heaven? You rule over all the kingdoms of the nations. Power and might are in your hand, and no one can withstand you. Our God, did you not drive out the inhabitants of this land before your people Israel and give it forever to the descendants of Abraham your friend? They have lived in it and have built in it a sanctuary for your Name, saying, ‘If calamity comes upon us, whether the sword of judgment, or plague or famine, we will stand in your presence before this temple that bears your Name and will cry out to you in our distress, and you will hear us and save us.’“But now here are men from Ammon, Moab and Mount Seir, whose territory you would not allow Israel to invade when they came from Egypt; so they turned away from them and did not destroy them. See how they are repaying us by coming to drive us out of the possession you gave us as an inheritance. Our God, will you not judge them? For we have no power to face this vast army that is attacking us. We do not know what to do, but our eyes are on you.”Jehoshaphat's response to his impossible situation is a sure cure for the grasshopper disease. I want to point out seven R's that I hope you'll remember, because this is the cure for you when you’re coming down with the grasshopper disease.The first R - Recite who God is.Notice that the first thing Jehoshaphat does is to recite the characteristics and nature of God:“Are you not the God who is in heaven? You rule over all the kingdoms of the nations. Power and might are in your hand, and no one can withstand you.” (2 Chronicles 20:6).Jehoshaphat's first move was to remind himself and his people of God and his power. And it has to be our first move, too. We must go back to the basics. We must have an in-depth knowledge of the nature of God. That means we must get to know God. Are you able to recite the nature and character of God? Is it firmly established in your heart and mind? When there are no answers, we must begin by reciting who God is.The second R - Remember God's great works.After reciting who God is, Jehoshaphat remembers what God had done:"Did you not drive out the inhabitants of this land before your people Israel and give it forever to the descendants of Abraham your friend?” (2 Chronicles 20:7).Isn't it amazing how your memory goes on you when you're in a crisis or when you're frightened? It takes an act of your will to remember what you should remember. But it's really important at these times that you purposely remember God's past miracles in your life, his faithfulness to you in days gone by, his deeds of old, as Jehoshaphat did. That's an important step two in curing the grasshopper disease.The third R - Recall God's promises.Notice that next Jehoshaphat recalls God's promises to the children of Israel. He says:"If calamity comes upon us...we will stand in your presence before this temple that bears your Name and will c...
If you haven’t read the book of Esther, I encourage you do so. Esther was faced with a challenge to go and share with the King that something was going to happen to her people. She told the King “My people are at risk. They are going to be completely taken away from the earth. There is a death wish on my life.” Her bold and courageous actions put her in a position of risking her own life. There is a part toward the end of the book of Esther where Mordecai, her cousin, who is taking care of her, the one who has told her of the plot to kill the Jews, tells her you can choose to remain silent.Like Esther it is actually your right as well. But rest assured that God’s purpose will prevail because he has a promised plan for us. And you are able to determine, in this critical moment, how your actions, or the lack there of, will influence the course of your history or simply tuck you away in its shadows.Esther with faith, courage and conviction replies, “I will rise. I will speak out. I will respectfully push back.” I am so inspired by Esther’s response here. You know why? Because she recognized that she had something to lose, and she was willing to lose that in order to gain a partnership with God and become a liberator.So often we navigate this world only thinking about gains. What am I going to accomplish? What am I going to get out of this? What am I going to receive in return? And yet so often we fail to consider what we could lose. And that is equally, if not more important, than considering our gains. Esther had the very lives of her people in her hands, and she was willing to say that she was not willing to risk that loss.When you think about your day-to-day life, what are you actually losing? It may not be as significant as what Esther was about to lose, but maybe it is time with your family, or time with the Lord. Or maybe it is the opportunity to do something else.So, I would encourage you, as you face your decisions, to be bold and courageous, and don’t forget to consider the losses as well. Maybe, just maybe, there are actually losses you are not willing to incur.(If you would like the devotional for the entire week, click here.)
One thing that always strikes me when reading through Jesus’ earthly ministry is how frequently and perhaps even how easily he set healthy boundaries despite the pressures of others. I don’t know about you, but I am typically the type of person that when a request is made of me, or I feel called to step into a situation, I am pretty apt to say “yes” right away.I don’t often place boundaries around my time like I would like to, or say “no” to the people around me in fear of letting them down. Yet, when I look at Jesus’ example, so often his willingness and his abilities to set boundaries was out of necessity for sustenance and a nourishment from the Father first. He stole away to quiet places to pray. The time he spent in the desert and resting and praying makes me feel uncomfortable as I face the pressures of my life. To think about taking days or weeks at a time to spend with the Lord makes me think about “all the things on my to-do list: what am I to do about all those things?” When I don’t set those healthy boundaries around my daily choices, too often I am not functioning out of God’s design for my life. I am trying to take things into my own hands.So, I want to encourage you, if you are walking in a season of challenges and difficulties, maybe you’re in a season of growth and opportunity, and you’re knowing that you are stepping into this bold and courageous place. How can you set healthy boundaries around your time, your relationships, your time with the Lord, with your family? That takes the ability to stop and ask yourself, “what is most important to me?”When I have new clients, one of the first activities we usually do is list out everything in their life that is important to them. Nothing is too significant or insignificant. We end up with a list of 25-30 things and then we go back and rank the top ten. Then I ask them to think back over the last week and over the last few days and ask, “How often have you prioritized these things?” And as you can imagine it makes them uncomfortable and it reminds me of how often I don’t prioritize my most important things.So, I encourage you, set boundaries like Jesus did. Even if you feel like you don’t have the time or space take five minutes, ten minutes, even one minute as a great starting point. Your decisions, your family, the people around you will thank you.
Is there a season or circumstance that may be happening right now where God is calling you to step out, to say something, to be an agent of change, to support the people around you? Whatever that circumstance is for you, I want you to consider the importance of context. Context is something that we often take for granted or forget to consider, especially if our circumstance is immediate and possibly causing us a lot of pressure. We have to get this done now. We need a solution in place. And we fail to consider context. That often can cause damage to our relationships that can actually create a solution that is not long term or more damaging than we had hoped.Looking at Esther’s story, one of the things that is so important is when her cousin Mordecai first comes to her to let her know that there is someone out there who wants to obliterate their people. And when this message is sent to Esther it comes through the people around her. Mordecai doesn’t come directly to Esther, and Esther needs some clarification.Sometimes when we are faced with an obstacle or a solution one of our first responses might be to immediately go to someone—the source of the problem or the person in charge—and ask for help, support, or clarity. But what we see Esther do here is so important.When she first becomes aware of Mordecai’s distress, and he can’t come to her because under the Persian law he is in mourning, she is beside herself. She wants to know what is happening, what is going on and what is troubling Mordecai. So, she actually sends clothes for him to change so that under the law he could come to her. But he objects. When we are in those seasons when we act on a situation, especially in an emergency, and things don’t go as we had planned, we immediately push back. And yet Esther pauses. She chooses to respect Mordecai’s decision. She considers the context of the situation. You know what she does next? She flexes in her approach.So, as you are facing a difficult season or circumstance and you are being called to step out in boldness and courage, I want you to consider the context of your circumstance and be open to flexibility.
What is radical acceptance? Esther gives us an example of what radical acceptance looks like. Esther was called to stand up and challenge the King to save her people. Esther was in a very dangerous position. Her life was on the line. As God gave her the courage and the boldness, she also had to consider her circumstances.I think a lot of times we have an idealized version of what our circumstances are going to look like when we are called to step into uncertainty—when we are called to speak up. We want to feel a certain way. We want to feel emboldened, confident; we don’t want to feel anxious. The reality of it is that most of the time those emotions of uncertainty are going to accompany us even if we know we are doing the right thing.Think about all the emotions Esther must have been feeling. She must have been feeling terrified, uncertain, and yet she showed up with faith, courage and conviction. She said, “I am going to stand up.” “I am going to speak up.” “I am going to respectfully push back.” Esther was by God to be a liberator of her people but as the Queen of Persia she was expected to be obedient to the law. She was expected to be quiet and submissive. But what she did in that moment is she chose to partner with God.She stepped into that place of uncertainty—of not knowing the outcome, probably feeling quite anxious about the outcome, and overwhelmed. But she knew her circumstances and said “Okay this is where God has placed me. I’m going to partner with God and we are going to bring about radical transformation. We are going to free the people. I am stepping out in faith.”When you find yourself facing a really difficult situation, I want you to consider how you can embrace and accept those emotions that might be holding you back. And yet still challenge yourself to step forward knowing that God will provide victory and God will carry you through.
One of the things I hear a lot from people, especially women who are in the marketplace, is when they get into a situation that is overwhelming or they start to feel that anxiety level rise, they begin to ask, “How do I navigate this?” I think one of the most important things for us to recognize about being bold and courageous is where we are launching from.
What is the ground you are standing on like? It is really hard to step out in courage when the floor beneath you is shaky. But I think we can ground ourselves more easily than we realize. I think we can be grounded right here, right now. You can be grounded whether your circumstances are overwhelming, or whether the decision you have to make is rather exhilarating but also daunting. Maybe your team or your family or whatever you are navigating is well oiled and going well or maybe it is breaking down. You can be grounded when people are with you and when people are against you. In any and every circumstance, as a Christ-follower you are grounded.
The Apostle Paul tells us “Therefore, as you have received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in him, having been firmly rooted and now being built up in him and established in your faith, just as you were instructed, and overflowing with gratitude” (Colossians 2:6-7).
Did you catch that? You have been firmly rooted. It is a done deal. Everything else from that point is the building up part. The building up part is hard. And that’s where our emotions can come in. But I want you to recognize that you are already there. You have been firmly rooted therefore you are grounded. So, when we hold on to that, we can keep our emotions in check. When I am feeling anxious, I can say “I am standing on solid ground.” I may feel overwhelmed but the ground beneath me is not moving. You may feel this is impossible, but God has got you. You are firmly rooted.
If you’re thinking I've made up this grasshopper sickness, let me remind you of the time when God's people were afflicted with it. You'll find it recorded in Numbers 13. Here are some selected verses from that chapter:
"The Lord said to Moses, 'Send some men to explore the land of Canaan, which I am giving to the Israelites. From each ancestral tribe send one of its leaders.' So at the Lord's command Moses sent them out from the Desert of Paran. All of them were leaders of the Israelites (13:1-3).
"When Moses sent them to explore Canaan, he said, 'See what the land is like and whether the people who live there are strong or weak, few or many. What kind of towns do they live in? Are they unwalled or fortified? How is the soil? Is it fertile or poor? Are there trees on it or not? Do your best to bring back some of the fruit of the land.' (13:17-20).
"So they went up and explored the land...At the end of forty days they returned from exploring the land... They gave Moses this account: 'We went into the land to which you sent us, and it does flow with milk and honey! Here is its fruit. But the people who live there are powerful, and the cities are fortified and very large... (13:21,25, 27-28).
"Then Caleb silenced the people before Moses and said, 'We should go up and take possession of the land, for we can certainly do it.' But the men who had gone up with him said, 'We can't attack those people; they are stronger than we are.' And they spread among the Israelites a bad report about the land they had explored. They said, 'The land we explored devours those living in it. All the people we saw there are of great size. We seemed like grasshoppers in our own eyes, and we looked the same to them.'" (13:30-33).
GRASSHOPPERS! That's how they saw themselves—grasshoppers! And as a result, they wanted to give up. They lost all hope of ever entering the promised land. In the 14th chapter the story continues:
"All the Israelites grumbled against Moses and Aaron, and the whole assembly said to them, 'If only we had died in Egypt! Or in this wilderness! Why is the Lord bringing us to this land only to let us fall by the sword? Our wives and children will be taken as plunder. Wouldn't it be better for us to go back to Egypt?'" (Numbers 14:2-3).
Oh, this grasshopper disease is really serious. Let me point out the symptoms of this sickness so you can check up and see if you've caught it lately:
First, it wipes out your memory.
Think of those children of Israel, poised on the borders of Canaan. How had they gotten there? God had miraculously led them out of Egypt. I mean, it's not every day you see the waters of the Red Sea parted and walk across on dry land. Miracle after miracle after miracle had happened right in front of their eyes. But they didn't even remember.
So, when you catch the grasshopper disease, you remember what you should forget and forget what you should remember.
Does that ever happen to you? How often have you found yourself facing what looked like an impossibility, and all you could talk about, all you could focus on was how difficult it was going to be? If that's where you are today, you may indeed be coming down with this disease.
Second, you grumble and complain.
If you know anything about the children of Israel, you know that griping and complaining was a common problem for them. And sure enough, as soon as they heard the bad report from the ten faithless spies, they complained and grumbled against Moses and Aaron. Notice that their complaining spirit quickly spread to everyone around them. This disease is very contagious!
When was the last time you grumbled or complained? Paul wrote to the Philippians "Do everything without complaining or arguing..." (2:14). Everything! When you complain, you not only bring yourself down, but everyone around you as well!
Third, you want to quit.
This grasshopper disease makes you want to retreat; to forget your calling ...
I want to encourage you to step out of the boat at the invitation of Jesus like Peter did, to do the good works he has for you to do. Could it be that you’ve been stuck in your boat and missing the joy of walking on the water with Jesus because of some fear or maybe laziness or just not wanting to rock your boat? If that’s where you are, it’s keeping you from knowing the incredible joy and fulfillment that comes when you simply obey Jesus and by trusting him, you do what God wants us to do.
You see, as a Christ-follower, you were created to do certain good works, as we read in Ephesians 2:10: For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. That is your mission in life, as established by God, and it is only when you are doing those good works that you are living in the completeness of who you are in Christ Jesus. Maybe you haven’t stepped out of the boat because you haven’t truly asked God to show you what good works he has for you to do. That’s a good place to start—just pray for guidance, and if you’re sincere about doing it, God will put a desire in your heart to do a good work.
Maybe you haven’t stepped out of the boat because you simply haven’t made time in your life to do those good works. Could it be that your life is so full of what you want to do, that you just can’t fit God’s calling into your schedule? I think of a person I knew who filled her life with lots of activity—fun things as well as career pursuits—so that there just was no time to put anything else in her life. She had just made her boat so comfortable that she didn’t want to leave it. But she missed the blessing of walking on water with Jesus.
Maybe you stepped out of the boat once and then you started to sink, like Peter did, and so you just jumped back in the boat and now you’re afraid you’ll sink again. But failure is often part of our growing process, and God gives us lots of second chances. I don’t think I could count the number of times God has had to rescue me and give me another opportunity to walk on the water with him. That’s the kind of Lord we serve, and he’s waiting to take your hand and show you the incomparable fulfillment that comes when you walk by faith and not by sight.
I just want to encourage you to keep your eyes on Jesus and follow his invitation to step out of the boat. I know it’s scary, but you don’t want to miss the indescribable joy of walking on the water with Jesus, doing what you could never do alone, and hearing him say “Well done.”
(Click here to download the devotional for this week.)
Did you know that there is no “little” with God? I’m talking this week about stepping out of the boat to do what Jesus is inviting and asking you to do. It takes courageous faith and it can be a little risky, but it is the way to the abundant life that Jesus has for us.
However, I think lots of times we don’t take that step out of the boat because we keep thinking that God measures people and gifts and accomplishments like we do—by size, by quantity, by big versus small. And we decide that what we can do just doesn’t seem that big or important, compared to what others are doing. But God doesn’t use our measurement systems.
You remember the parable of the talents, where three guys were given different quantities—one ten talents, one five and one only one talent. The first two servants got busy and doubled their talents, but the guy with only one talent just sat down and did nothing. No doubt he figured that he couldn’t do much with only one talent anyway, so why bother? What difference would it make? But as Jesus tells that parable, it made a huge difference, and he was severely reprimanded by the Master. He could have done something with his one talent, but he just gave up.
Have you been disparaging the importance of your “one talent,” your gift, your ability, your opportunities? Have you been thinking that God is not involved in your “little” life?
Can I remind you of the boy with the small lunch? Jesus multiplied it more than he could have ever dreamed. What about the widow who gave her last penny? Not small to Jesus. Jesus said she gave more than the others. And those two people have been memorialized in Scripture for centuries.
You see, Jesus just measures differently than we do. If your excuse has been that you don’t have much to offer to the Lord, it simply won’t hold water. Jesus measures what you do with what you’ve been given—where you started and where you ended up—and he never compares you to anyone else.
Mother Teresa used to advise, “Don’t try to do great things for God. Do small things with great love.” There’s a passage in Zechariah 4 that says “Who dares despise the day of small things?” (Zechariah 4:10a). Maybe you’ve been despising or discounting what you see as a small thing that God wants you to do, and that’s why you haven’t stepped out of the boat. Can I encourage you to do that small thing with great love for Jesus? To step out of your boat and experience the joy of walking on water as Jesus empowers you. You’ll never regret it.
The Bible teaches us that as Christ-followers, we have to walk by faith not by sight. That means sometimes we have to take a risk, step out of the boat like Peter did, in order to walk where Jesus invites us. I’m talking about stepping out of our boats this week, and some things I’ve learned in my years of following Christ. Think about this:
Obedience is more important to God than your comfort.
I believe that God sometimes withholds information from us and takes away our security blankets because he’s teaching us the simple discipline of obeying. If you’re trying to cross all your t’s and dot all your i’s before you step out of the boat, you’ll probably be sitting there a long time! Sure, we need to do our due diligence and not foolishly charge ahead without making adequate plans. But seeing every turn in the road ahead just never happens with God. He shows us enough light for the next step.
The Bible says that the Word of God is a lamp for our feet and a light for our path. We don’t walk blindly ahead, but we take it one step at a time, walking through the open doors even when we’re not quite sure what’s on the other side. Control freaks will have difficulty walking by faith, because it requires that you trust God all the way and relinquish the control into his hands. Psalm 91 is good for the faith walker—it says that God will cover us and his faithfulness will be our shield and defense. Quoting verse 9: “If you say, “The Lord is my refuge,” and you make the Most High your dwelling, no harm will overtake you, no disaster will come near your tent” (Psalm 91:9-10). When you step out of the boat, God has your back.
And consider this:
Often God’s will is for us to make some decisions.
Making decisions is one way we grow and learn. So, there will be times when you simply will not have any great emotional confirmation or direction, but you will be faced with a decision that you must make, based on your knowledge of Scripture and the wisdom that God promises to give us.
That means, of course, that you are taking a risk—the risk that you could make the wrong decision. You could absolutely fall on your face. In fact, if you haven’t fallen on your face once or twice, my guess is, you haven’t done much! Asking God to give us clear, unmistakable signs—like Gideon of old—is not an act of faith. It is a sign that we really don’t want to walk by faith; it is evidence that we are controlled by our fears.
So, is God showing you that he wants you to step out of the boat? What’s keeping you from taking the next step?
I wonder if you’ve ever thought about what it must have felt like to Peter when he actually walked on water at Jesus’ invitation? What an incredible experience—something no one had ever done before. But you know, he had to step out of the boat in order to do it.
I’m talking this week about stepping out of our boats, taking the risk that comes when we follow Jesus to do the good works he’s called us to do. This step of faith will often take you outside your natural gifting, and you’ll have to trust God to see you through.
Here’s another thing I’ve learned about stepping out of the boat:
You’ll always feel inadequate, because the truth is, you’ll always be inadequate.
I would remind you of what Paul wrote to the Corinthians:
But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. God chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him (1 Corinthians 1:27-29).
Recognizing your inadequacies doesn’t mean you are not called to do the job; it just means that God has chosen to use you and he will get the glory because in yourself, you can’t do it. It wasn’t long ago that I took on a new project that was totally out of my wheelhouse, as we say. On paper I was not qualified for the job, but I had no doubt that God wanted me to do it, so I just kept going, depending on him to teach me, to put people in my life who could help, etc. Stepping out of the boat usually takes you where you’ve never been before.
God is always preparing us for what is ahead, even when we don’t realize it.
Think of King David. Do you think that while he was tending sheep he ever thought that God had chosen him to be King of Israel? Not once, I’m sure. But that’s where he became an expert with a slingshot; that’s where he wrote music and words and learned to play an instrument. All of which God used mightily in his life then and to bless untold millions in the centuries since then.
I dare say if you look back on your own history, whatever you’ve learned, whatever you’ve experienced, whatever hardships or difficulties you’ve gone through, they have prepared you for something God is doing or is going to do with you. You may have never chosen that kind of education or preparation, but God knows how to turn even what others meant for evil into good for us.
Is God inviting you to step out of the boat? Don’t miss the blessing that is yours when you do.
God has for you to do. Don’t miss the blessing that comes when you step out of the boat with Jesus.
You are no doubt familiar with the time when Jesus walked on the waters of the Sea of Galilee, and Peter decided he wanted to join him. So Jesus invited him to step out of the boat and when Peter did that, he actually walked on water for a few steps, until he took his eyes off of Jesus.
Well, this week I want to talk about stepping out of the boat—being willing to take a step of faith in order to do what you believe God wants you to do. If you’re willing to take a risk, as it were, to experience the new thing that God has for you, you’ll have to step out of the safe boat and do something you’ve never done before, something you couldn’t possibly do unless Jesus invited you and empowered you to do it.
So, the first challenge is to check it out and make sure this new idea or adventure is a God-thing. How do you know? Well, you pray about it a lot, you seek wisdom from godly people, and if it’s from God it will be something that will help and bless others, not something to promote yourself. It will be one of the good works God ordained in advance for you to do, as we read in Ephesians 2:10. Once you are fairly confident that this idea or passion is from God, here are some things to consider—things I’ve learned along the way.
God often gives us assignments that are outside of our gifting.
It’s true that we all have individual gifts from God and God wants us to use those gifts to serve others.
But in order to do the good works which were ordained in advance for you to do, you will sometimes be out on a limb, in territory that is not only new, but territory that doesn’t fit.
Let me give you one personal example: My skills as a manager of people are not naturally good. But to do the good works God has called me to do, I’ve had to manage people in one capacity or another for many years. It came with the God-given job. So, what do you do when you have to do something outside your gifting? You seek help! It took me too long to figure this out, but finally I have enlisted the help of people who are very good at this—people who have done it and who can teach me things I need to know. What a difference that has made.
So, I just want you to know that the work God calls you to do will have parts that you aren’t particularly good at, and parts you don’t necessarily enjoy. Don’t let that keep you from the good works God has for you to do. Don’t miss the blessing that comes when you step out of the boat with Jesus.
Most of us are sufficiently informed about safe driving techniques and rules of the road, but many times we ignore them. And when we do, we can find ourselves in many difficulties. For example, do you allow your car to warm up before revving up the motor and taking off? I’m told that's bad for the car and it can damage the motor, but many times we just turn on the ignition and go because we're in a rush.
The question is, do you live like that? How often do you procrastinate getting up until the last minute, so you don't have any time to quietly warm up your mind and your heart and tune it into the things of the Lord before leaving home? When you do that, you leave home undressed—you don't have the armor of God in place to protect you against your enemy. If you head into your spiritual battlefield without even thinking about putting on the armor of God, as explained in Ephesians 6, your enemy will often be able to defeat you.
Not only that, but you don't have time to get your inner mind and thoughts focused on Jesus. You don't have time to pray for his guidance and his wisdom, so you face your days trying to do everything yourself and relying on yourself for needed wisdom. How foolish. And you'll find that your mind easily goes in the wrong direction all day long; you'll see how easy it is for you to be impatient and unkind and uncaring. All because you left home without warming up, just like you often do with your car.
You know, you can jump in that car day after day and rush off without warming up, and you may not notice any problem, until one day the motor conks out in the middle of traffic. Bad driving habits often come home to roost later. The same is true spiritually. If you head off most days without warming up spiritually, it may not show up for awhile, but eventually spiritual failure will result.
So, do you live like you drive? I hope you'll warm your car up before you leave home, but much more importantly, make that early warm-up time with Jesus an absolute necessity and discipline that you practice regularly. I guarantee you'll see remarkable improvement in your performance as a believer if you'll get in tune with Jesus early in your day.
Here's another driving question: Do you abide by speed limits? Do you drive as fast as you think you can without being stopped by a cop? I know that often I find myself pushing that pedal down a little too far, thinking, "Oh, well, I can go a few miles over the limit; that's no harm.” Well, that's a bad driving habit, but it's an even worse living habit. God's speed limits in our lives are there to give us abundant life, not to rob our joy.
A “road” where many people frequently speed is in their sexual practices. Even Christians who are committed to a pure lifestyle often find themselves in compromising situations because they don't abide by the speed limits. Let me tell you, this is one area where if you deviate from God's principles, you can end up in a spiritual wreck. Most people who start speeding down this road never intend to commit adultery or fornication, but they lose control of themselves, just as you lose control of a car if you drive too fast.
You cannot go too slowly when it comes to dealing with your sexual drives and passions. Just as you drive very cautiously on a road covered with ice and snow, you have to be exceptionally careful about sexual temptation. Don't put any confidence in yourself when it comes to controlling those impulses. Stay off the road that leads down that path, and travel very slowly when your sexual impulses kick in.
Many Christians push the speed limits in the area of what they read and listen to and view. Trashy or unedifying reading material just fills your mind up with junk, and most movies are even worse. Are you highly selective about what you allow into your mind? If you're exceeding the limits of purity in these areas, don't be surprised to discover that you'll have an accident somewhere soon,
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Are you desiring transformation in your life? Spiritual renewal and growth in your walk as a follower of Jesus?
This is one of my favorite prayers from Psalm 139: Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting (Psalm 139:23-24). I love this prayer of David. He invites God to investigate his life, to put his life and actions to the test. He asks God to know his every thought, examining not just his outward conduct, but what he thinks about.
If God were to examine your thoughts, what would he find? What passes through your mind; what occupies your imagination and memory; what thoughts do you dwell on? Anxious thoughts? Fearful thoughts? Self-defeating thoughts? Sinful thoughts? Most of us let our thoughts run wild when God tells us to hold our thoughts captive to him. Which essentially means, our thoughts should align with God’s thoughts. Philippians 4:8 gives us guidance on the thoughts to entertain: whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable—if there is any moral excellence and if there is any praise—dwell on these things. The mind is super powerful. It has been said that the directions of your thoughts determine the direction of your life. And David gives God an open invitation to try his thoughts to ultimately see if they stand the godly test.
David invites God to test him. You can hear the desire in David’s words. He wants his life to reflect that of a man following hard after him. To rid himself of anything that is offensive to God and walk in integrity as a man after God’s heart. And if you know the story of David you know he did not live a perfect life, and neither do we. If we are honest, there are parts of our lives that we let God into and other parts that have a “do not disturb” sign.
Yet here is David, inviting God into every nook and cranny of his life because his ultimate desire was to live a life fully pleasing to God. That is the kind of life that will ultimately bring us the greatest joy and fulfillment.
If you want to experience transformation in your life and a greater intimacy with God, invite the Holy Spirit to lovingly point out things in your life that are hindering you from living life to the fullest in Jesus, one that honors and pleases him.
When you do you will be led not in the way of sin and evil but in the way of godliness and everlasting life in Christ.
(Click here to download the devotional for the entire week.)
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
A well-known prayer from the apostle Paul is a rich example of the power of intercessory prayer.
Intercessory prayer is the privilege of petitioning God on the behalf of others. We are not concerned with our needs but with the needs of others.
I love praying for people, and when someone tells me they are praying for me I feel loved, seen, and deeply cared for. There have been seasons in my life where the burdens have felt very heavy. I have been anxious, worried, and desperately needing direction and comfort from God. In moments of hardship, inexplicably waves of peace and comfort would come over me and I would feel a sense of “groundedness.” Then I would find out that a friend was praying for me. The prayers of my friends have sustained me and encouraged me in times of difficulty.
You can easily pray for the needs of others. For their health, job, financial issues, marital problems, broken relationships, dreams, desires, and unmet longings. And one of the greatest things you can pray for is their spiritual growth and an increasing love for, trust, and faith in Jesus; along with a growing knowledge of his love for them and his power at work in their lives.
In Ephesians Paul prayed a powerful prayer for believers and one that we can pray as well: “I pray that out of his glorious riches Christ may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen” (Ephesians 3:16-21).
One of the greatest gifts we can give people is the gift of praying for them. Who is someone you can intercede for in prayer? Who is someone you can go to battle for, petitioning God on their behalf? Write their name in your journal and commit to praying for them. See how God works in you and how he meets them as you are faithful in prayer.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
When was the last time you sat before the Lord and thanked him? Really thanked him—expressing your heartfelt gratitude to Jesus?
Here is another Psalm of David. This one gives us a rich example of what it looks like to pour out our hearts in thanksgiving to God.
King David had many highs and lows in his life. David experienced hardship, loss, suffering, fear, anger, worry, and despair. In the midst of being hunted down by his enemies, we see a man who passionately pursued God as his faith was being purified. Psalm 138 are the words of a man faithful to God and grateful to him in all seasons of life.
Let this be your prayer of thanksgiving to the Lord. I will give you thanks with all my heart; I will sing your praise before the heavenly beings. I will bow down toward your holy temple and give thanks to your name for your constant love and truth. You have exalted your name and your promise above everything else. On the day I called, you answered me; You increased strength within me. If I walk into the thick of danger, you will preserve my life from the anger of my enemies.
You will extend your hand; Your right hand will save me.
The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me. Lord, your love is eternal; do not abandon the work of your hands (Psalm 138:1-8 HCSB). Prayer is an authentic outpouring of our thoughts and emotions to a holy God who hears us; a gateway to intimacy with God as we humbly come before him acknowledging his goodness and faithfulness.
It can be easy to thank God when things in life are going according to your plan. But do you praise him when it feels like your life has taken a detour or dreams are delayed? Do you express gratitude in times of trouble because you know God’s character? Do you thank him that he will never leave you nor forsake you and that he is with you in the middle of life’s storms?
Isaiah 26:3 says, “You will keep the mind that is dependent on you in perfect peace, for it is trusting in you.”
Praise is not something conditional based on our circumstances; praise exposes the condition of our hearts. How will you spend time pouring out your heart to God in gratitude this week? He is worthy of your praise.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
The book of Psalms has often been called a book of prayer and it is rich with examples of the Psalmists' communication with God. As a follower of Jesus, you have a relationship with God that enables you to have rich spiritual communication with him. You have the privilege of talking to God, of pouring out your heart to him, and also hearing and listening to him by the power of his Holy Spirit.
We see this pouring out in prayer in Psalm 25, a Psalm of David. David was a king of Israel and referred to as a man after God’s own heart. Throughout Psalms we see him crying out to God as he is repeatedly pursued by his enemies, lamenting of his sin, and praying in his times of deepest struggle and need. David gives us an honest look into what it sounds like to come before God in times of trouble. In this Psalm we hear the cries of his heart as he seeks counsel from the Lord and confesses his utter dependence on him.
Where do you turn when you feel desperate? Who or what do you depend on in times of trouble? Maybe you are in a tough season in your marriage, your singleness, your health, your job. Perhaps a co-worker has talked poorly about you and given you a bad reputation or you are out of work and don’t know what is next and you desperately need guidance. David reminds us where to keep our focus.
“Lord, I turn to you. My God, I trust in you. Do not let me be disgraced; do not let my enemies gloat over me. No one who waits for you will be disgraced; those who act treacherously without cause will be disgraced. Make your ways known to me, Lord; teach me your paths. Guide me in your truth and teach me; for you are the God of my salvation; I wait for you all day long. Remember Lord, your compassion and your faithful love, for they have existed from antiquity.” (Psalm 25:1-6 HCSB).
You hear the longing, humility, and gratitude in David’s words. He begins this prayer by acknowledging God and declaring his trust in him and his character. God is trustworthy no matter what difficulties he is facing. He courageously asks God for what he needs. He desperately desires to hear from God, to know his ways and to be guided in truth. He waits on the Lord as long as it takes until he hears his voice and his direction.
I think it can be easy to forget the goodness of God. Or to pray and get impatient in the waiting. Have you forgotten the goodness of God in your time of desperation? Are you impatient as you wait on him? Someone once said, God is never late, he is rarely early, but he is always on time. Pour your heart out to him, praise him, trust him. He knows just what you need.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Have you ever longed for something—prayed fervently for something you wanted with all of your heart and soul? Maybe you are single and you have prayed for a spouse. Or you are married and have prayed for a child. Perhaps you have prayed for a specific job, a raise, or a promotion. Sometimes we see God answer our prayers in a way we desire, other times he answers in a way that we did not expect and is not in alignment with what we hoped for. Maybe you are in a period of waiting and wondering if and when God will come through.
Sometimes we ask God for something and he answers with a “no,” “yes,” or a “not yet.” It is in the times of no or not yet that our faith can be stretched. And it is also in these times where it can be super easy to miss the blessing and provision that is in front of us because we are so fixed on the outcome we want.
When I think of a prayer of longing, it reminds me of Hannah’s prayer in 1 Samuel. Hannah was grieving over a difficult situation in her life. She desperately desired a son but was unable to bear children so she went before the Lord and poured her heart out before him. First Samuel 1:10 tells us, “Deeply hurt, Hannah prayed to the Lord and wept many tears.” Hannah declares, “I am a woman with a broken heart…. I’ve been pouring out my heart before the Lord… I am praying from the depth of my anguish and resentment” (1 Samuel 1:10,15-16 CSB). Hannah is honest about the pain of her unmet longing.
What is a longing of your heart that has not been met in the way or in the timing that you want? It can be really hard to trust God to give us what is best when a deep desire of our heart is delayed. Hannah was in a heartbroken place and she poured her heart out to God and God heard her.
We don’t like hard places, but God uses difficult places to draw you into a deeper relationship with him. He wants you to come to him with your hurts, heartache, bitterness, and resentment. God already knows what’s on your mind and heart but praying helps you to work through and process your pain when you verbalize and give words to your emotions, allowing the vulnerability and depth of your heart to cry out to him.
When you are suffering from hardships, difficulties, and unmet longings, God is working in ways you cannot see. It may not turn out like you had hoped but God is at work and he will strengthen you to walk by faith and trust when you pour your heart out to him.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
I have a question for you. How are you doing? No, really, how are you doing? What are the things that are most consuming your thoughts? What is a worry, concern or uncertainty, maybe a disappointment, unmet need, longing or loss that is weighing on your mind?
If you were to do a check-in with your heart and your soul, what would you notice? Are you weary, tired, stressed out, angry, or depleted? Are you feeling overwhelmed or overworked? In the busyness of life, it is important to take time to do a self-check and get a gauge on our souls. Because let’s face it, life can be hard, and it is easy to get depleted.
How do you experience renewal, refreshment and supernatural strength in your life? How do you receive sustenance in difficult times and grow in your ability to experience the divine power and presence of God? I want to remind you of the power of prayer. Now before you say, “I already know about prayer,” my question is, how consistently do you practice the power of prayer?
I read a quote that said, “If you want your life to experience divine power, it needs to be a praying life.” Far too often it can be easy to bypass the transformation that comes from prayer because we are prone to put it on the back burner. But we can experience the divine presence and power to greater degrees in our lives.
If you think about it, what are the reasons we don’t make prayer a daily habit? Being brutally honest, we don’t really believe that prayer works. Or since God already knows what we are thinking, why do we need to pray? And all too often the old “I am too busy” can become a barrier to a praying life.
If you think you are too time crunched to pray, you need only to look to Jesus who modeled prayer and whose life points to not only the necessity of prayer but the practice of prayer in the busyness and demands of life. In Luke chapter 5, we see that crowds of people came to hear Jesus teach and to be healed of their sickness, and then it says, “But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed” (Luke 5:16). In the midst of his ministry, healing and teaching, Jesus points us to the power of prayer.
In the hustle and bustle of life it is so easy to be on autopilot, going at warp speed, that we neglect to take the time to slow down and get away from the crowds and pray.
Retreating from the crowds doesn’t necessarily mean going to a mountain or rural place, although that sounds really nice. It may simply be waking up early in the morning before the demands of the day kick in. Sitting in a quiet place in your house or apartment, even if for a few minutes before you start your day, to come before the Lord and in the quietness of his presence, pray. Of course, prayer is not reserved just for morning times. There is no one right time of day to pray, it is something you can do throughout your day.
When you spend time in prayer, you make space to hear from God and for the Holy Spirit to guide your steps and transform your heart. Having a vibrant prayer life is a significant spiritual practice among followers of Jesus. Prayer positions you to pour out your heart so that you can be filled up and experience deep connection with the Lord.
In Psalm 116 the Psalmist says, “I love the Lord because he has heard my appeal for mercy. Because he has turned his ear to me I will call out to him as long as I live” (Psalm 116:1-2).
I love the reminder all throughout the Bible that God inclines his ear towards us. He listens intently. He delights in hearing your voice.
Throughout the years I have struggled to pray. Especially in times where I felt distant from God, it was really hard for me to want to talk to him. Sometimes I didn’t even know where to begin. And then I read a book that suggested starting each day with the Lord’s prayer. In the gospel of Mathew, Jesus gave his disciples and us a model for prayer. Even if you start with 15 seconds a day,
It is better to pray a bad prayer than not to pray at all, because there are no pointless prayers. But praying in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers—praying as Jesus taught us to pray in what we call the Lord’s Prayer—this is even more powerful praying.
So, even though it is better to pray a bad prayer than not to pray at all, it is better still to pray effectively. How do we make sure our prayers are as powerful and effective as they can be? Well, Jesus gave us a format for prayer, which we call The Lord’s Prayer but it really is The Disciple’s Prayer, and if you pray like Jesus taught you to, then I believe it will be more effective and powerful.
Years ago I realized that my prayer time was rather monotonous, repetitive and not very exciting. It was more of a duty than a privilege. So, I took The Lord’s Prayer as my guide and I began a prayer journal, where I organized my prayer time based on how Jesus taught us to pray. That absolutely revolutionized my prayer life. It gave structure and meaning to what had been rather generalized prayers, and I began to keep a record of answers to prayer. Now, many years later, I have pages and pages of answered prayer—many I would have forgotten had I not made a record.
And I began to pray Scripture into my life. That has truly transformed my prayer time and me. For example, I pray Romans 12:1-2 regularly, committing my body to him as a living sacrifice for that day, asking that I will not be conformed to this world, but transformed by the renewing of mind, and in that way I can prove God’s will for my life for that day. I promise you, that is effective, powerful praying.
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In 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 we read: “Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” Prayer is simply conversation with God, and that should be an on-going conversation, where at any time in any day you are so connected with God that you keep the conversation going.
I was thinking of the ways we stay connected now with the people in our lives. Because of all the technological advances and gadgets that we have, we truly can keep a conversation going just about all the time, can’t we? Well, don’t you think we should stay connected with God throughout our entire day at least as much as we do with our loved ones and friends?
I have a long-time friend who is a successful lawyer, and she incorporates prayer all through her day. I asked her how she keeps this continual conversation with God in the midst of a busy day, and how that affects her life. Here is how she replied.
“I have many goals every day as I work—like providing valuable legal advice, articulately presenting a client's position, clearly and accurately drafting necessary documents—but there is no more important goal that I have in my work with clients and with co-workers than to show the love of Jesus to them in every interaction. I try to pray before every call, every meeting, and even as I am walking through the halls of my office, that I will show Jesus' love. I text my prayer partners before important calls and meetings to pray that I will show Jesus' love to everyone. It changes everything about how I see people and how I treat them. It helps me focus on the most important thing—the love of Jesus. And no matter what the outcome is of the call/meeting/interaction, whether I performed well or whether I delivered the value that I wanted to deliver to our client, if I was able to share just a tiny bit of the love that Jesus has given me, then I consider it a success and not a failure because love never fails.”
I am one of her prayer partners and I love the way she brings a conversation of God into everything she does. She prays on all occasions with all kinds of prayers, and as we read in James, “The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective” (James 5:16b). When you have been born from above and the righteousness of Jesus has been given to you, then you can claim this promise, that your prayers are powerful and effective, because you have the righteousness of Christ.
I strongly urge you to keep a conversation going with God all day long. His Spirit is totally with you and is attentive to your prayer, so pray! And remember, there are no pointless prayers!
Have you stopped praying because it feels like your prayers are pointless? The Bible teaches us to pray about everything, even if it seems pointless. Ephesians 6:18 says, “And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests.”
What does it mean to pray
On all occasions
This simply means it is appropriate to pray about every occasion in our lives. From the smallest incidents to the traumatic occurrences, pray on all occasions. My friend, Fran, first taught me this truth by the way she prayed.
I remember one specific time when she lost the diamond in her wedding ring. She immediately began to pray about it, and of course, she began a desperate search for her diamond. A couple of days later, she decided to search her car. Now, how likely would it be that a small diamond could be found in a car—even if indeed that was where it was? But she prayed that God would help her find that diamond, and you guessed it—tucked in one of the car seats there it was. Fran prayed on all occasions about everything, even when it seemed pointless, even when it’s not a life and death issue, even when it’s a small thing like a diamond.
And then, this verse says we are to pray
With all kinds of prayers and requests
God invites us to petition him—to make our requests known to him. James said you have not because you ask not. Intercession is praying for others, and this is certainly one of the most important kinds of prayer we should pray. Corporate prayer is another form of prayer—praying with others. Urgent cries for help, insignificant requests for God’s favor, praying for the salvation of people who seem totally closed to the Gospel—there are many kinds of prayers and requests, and even if they seem pointless, we should pray for them because there are no pointless prayers.
There are no pointless prayers! I began to mediate on this after reading an article by Marcus Warner, where he points out the story of Zechariah and his wife Elizabeth. They were childless and Elizabeth was long past child-bearing age. But Zechariah, who was a priest, had many times prayed for a son. No doubt it felt like a pointless prayer at this point in their lives, but as he was praying before the altar of incense, he encountered an angel who told him his prayers had been answered. And indeed in a short time Elizabeth gave birth to John the Baptist.
As Marcus writes, “Zechariah had offered many “pointless” prayers for his wife, Elizabeth. Realistically, she was never going to have a child—not now, not at her age. But it turns out, there are no throwaway prayers. God had heard them, and God was about to act.”
“How about you? Have you given up praying for someone or something because the prayers have begun to feel pointless? You never know,” as Marcus says, “An angel may already be on the way.”
Ephesians 6:18 says, “And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people.” So, prayer can take many different forms and we should pray about everything—on all occasions. What does this verse teach us about praying? First, it says,
Pray in the Spirit
What does it mean to pray in the Spirit? It simply means that we need the Holy Spirit to help us with our prayers. Romans 8:26 says, “In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans.” Praying in the Spirit does not refer to the words we are saying. Rather, it refers to how we are praying. Praying in the Spirit is praying according to the Spirit’s leading. It is praying for things the Spirit leads us to pray for and it is trusting the Spirit to pray for us.
When you feel like your prayers are pointless—or maybe you just don’t even know how to pray about a certain situation—just ask God’s Spirit to present your heart’s request to God. That is praying in the Spirit.
Do you ever think, “That is a pointless prayer. Nothing’s going to change in that situation, so why bother praying about it”? Well, if you’ve ever felt that way, I encourage you to believe that there are “No Pointless Prayers.”
I can certainly relate to that feeling of praying for something or someone and afterwards feeling like it’s not going to make any difference. But recently I was sent an article by Marcus Warner of Deeper Life Ministries entitled “No Pointless Prayers,” and I eagerly read it because the title resonated with me. Is it true there are no pointless prayers?
In his article, Marcus talks about a time recently when he thought of some friends—a couple—who are not yet believers and have not yet shown much inclination to learn about Christianity, and as he was reminded of them, he just said a quick prayer that they would come to saving faith. Immediately afterwards an inner voice said to him That was a pointless prayer. He recognized that this thought had come from the enemy, and later he wrote in his journal a message from God to him:
“I heard your prayers. They were not pointless. The incense comes before the throne of grace—a sweet smelling, wonderful aroma of love and worship in a world that is broken and malfunctioning. There are no pointless prayers.”
Marcus goes on to say, “This feels true to me. Granted, some praying is more effective than others, but it is better to pray badly than not to pray at all.”
Is there something or someone you’ve been praying for a long time and it feels pointless? Don’t give up. In Luke 18 Jesus gave us the parable of the persistent widow who kept on begging the judge to grant her request, which he finally did simply because she was so persistent. Jesus said the purpose of this parable was to show his disciples that they should always pray and not give up.
I want to encourage you to always pray and not give up praying for what is on your heart, even if it seems pointless to you. There are no pointless prayers.
I want to recommend a book by Sherry Harney entitled Praying with Eyes Wide Open. I read it a few years ago and found it very helpful in tackling this issue of what it means to pray at all times, so I’ll be sharing some of Sherry’s thoughts with you—and I highly recommend her book.
When you think of praying, what comes to your mind? Do you see prayer as a time when you must be quiet, either sit or kneel, close your eyes and bow your head? Does it seem almost sacrilegious to open your eyes when you are praying or when someone else is? Is prayer to be reserved for those specific times in a day—or a week—when you can get in the right position and the right frame of mind for prayer? If that’s how you see prayer, then praying at all times or praying continually will continue to be an impossibility.
Did you know that the Bible gives no specific directions about your posture or the state of your eyes when you pray? You won’t find any references in the Bible demonstrating that people are praying with heads bowed and eyes closed. In fact, you’ll find many times when prayer was often given standing up, with arms outstretched toward heaven. We have passages that speak of God’s people praying in the midst of a battle, while shepherding sheep or on a journey, in public and private places. In John 17 we read that “after Jesus said this, he looked toward heaven and prayed.”
We see where Solomon spread out his hands toward heaven as he prayed, and David lifted up his hands. The apostle Paul exhorted us to pray with holy hands lifted, as we read in 1 Timothy 2:8. And often the apostles laid their hands on people as they prayed for them.
No doubt there are good reasons at times for us to close our eyes and bow our heads in prayer, but that is not a requirement. Therefore, praying at all times or praying continually might not truly be impossible if we can pray at any time, in any position and in any place, wouldn’t you agree?
Consider this, if prayer is limited to certain postures and places, then our prayer time is very limited, is it not? But if we can pray with eyes open, silently or verbally, anywhere and anytime, then we are much more likely to expand our prayer life and spend far more time in the presence of our God. We just need to develop a new attitude toward prayer and determine to keep a conversation going with God throughout our day, as we stand, sit, drive, run, work, lie down—whatever!
In her book, Sherry points out that it is not that we have to pray continually, but rather we are allowed to pray continually. God will not be disappointed with you if you don’t pray all the time. Rather, he invites you into his presence to commune with him at all times, anytime you wish. That is the wonder of our invitation to go to God, entering into the holiest place, at his throne, where he is waiting for us and wants us to be with him, and where we will find grace and mercy to help in our time of need.
Here’s how it works to pray continually. You must become intentional about practicing the presence of Jesus. That means, you must determine to be aware—at all times and in all places—that because you are a Christ-follower and have been born again, you are surrounded with the presence of Jesus all day, every day, 24/7. Through the power of the Holy Spirit, you have him with you at all times; the problem for us is that we all-too-often don’t recognize or acknowledge his presence.
For example, let’s say you have a really close friend or family member—the person on this earth closest to you. You are with them as often as possible, and when you are with them you communicate—you talk. You share the problems and issues of your life, but you also share the joys. You laugh together; you cry together; sometimes you’re just silent together, but that person’s presence is there with you.
This is not a perfect analogy, but just consider that Jesus is your best friend, your closest companion, your confidant. And,
Have you ever had the run-away blues? The run-away blues are those days, those times in your life when you’d just love to run away. When the thought of going to the airport and catching the next flight out to anywhere else, rather than where you are, sounds like a really good idea. Run-away blues—who hasn’t had those days?
David expressed it so well in Psalm 55. He was in a bad place then; his enemies were threatening him, his mind was a jumbled mess, his heart was in anguish and he was frightened. Now mind you, that was the condition of King David, a man after God’s own heart, who was chosen by God to be the King of Israel. I mean, come on, David, why would you want to run-away? But listen to what he wrote:
I said, “Oh, that I had the wings of a dove! I would fly away and be at rest. I would flee far away and stay in the desert; I would hurry to my place of shelter, far from the tempest and storm” (Psalm 55:6-8).
David was doing what he was supposed to do, as God’s-appointed king, and yet he longed to fly away and be at rest. Are you right now where David was then? Well, aren’t you glad he was inspired by God to put his feelings in writing and leave them for you today? It says that you aren’t condemned for feeling like you want to run away. Even kings have those times. But you have a God who cares and who can bring release and relief for you, right there where you are.
After expressing his run-away desires and fears to God, David then says:
As for me, I call to God, and the Lord saves me. Evening, morning and noon I cry out in distress, and he hears my voice. . . Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken (Psalm 55:16-17, 22).
I just want to remind you of these words of hope, from a king who wanted to fly away from where God had planted him. Even in the midst of doing what God has called you to do, you can lose your bloom and the enemy can steal your joy. If that’s where you are, just call to God—cry out to him. Cast your cares on the Lord, and he will put a new bloom inside you, and your desert will become a garden where you’re blooming again, and the joy of the Lord will again be your strength.
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If you want to be inspired, just Google “plants that grow in concrete” and you will see amazing pictures of all kinds of flowers and plants that are able to grow in the most difficult, unlikely places. I was totally mesmerized to see lovely flowers growing out of cracks in a sidewalk, beautiful blooms popping up from a pile of old tires—picture after picture of plants that bloomed in the most unlikely and difficult places.
That’s the challenge each of us faces to make the very best of where we are, blooming where we are planted. The children of Israel were captured and taken from Jerusalem to Babylon, and through the prophet Jeremiah, God told them to bloom right there. You’ll find that story in Jeremiah 29.
But in Psalm 137 we find this sad passage: By the rivers of Babylon we sat and wept when we remembered Zion. There on the poplars we hung our harps, for there our captors asked us for songs, our tormentors demanded songs of joy; they said, “Sing us one of the songs of Zion!” How can we sing the songs of the Lord while in a foreign land? (Psalm 137:1-4). Doesn’t sound like they were blooming there in Babylon, does it? Their joy was gone; their song was dead; they had given up because they were in Babylon and not in Jerusalem. Notice that they had the opportunity to sing the songs of Zion, the songs of the Lord. They could have shared the truth about the true God with these pagan people, but their response was, “How can we sing the songs of the Lord while in a foreign land?”
Maybe that’s where you are. You’re in some place that you don’t want to be—maybe you’re just bored or tired or totally unmotivated, so you’ve hung your harp on a poplar tree, so to speak, and quit blooming. I’ve been there; I know how that feels, but I just want to encourage you to remember that there is a beautiful bloom inside of you, planted there by our God, and if you’ll open a little crack and let his sunshine in, you can bloom right there again and his love will shoot up through that crack and you’ll once again bloom where you’re planted.
So, go get that harp you hung up on the poplar tree, and by faith—not necessarily by feelings—ask God to give you a song to sing right where you are, a song from the Lord even while you’re planted in that place you don’t want to be. You can turn your Babylon into a garden full of God’s love, knowing he loves you and sharing his love with everyone around you.
“Bloom where you are planted.” It’s not found in the Bible but it certainly is a biblical attitude. There’s a passage in Jeremiah that is a great example of what it means to “bloom where you are planted.” You’ll find it in Jeremiah 29, and it is a letter that the prophet wrote to the people whom Nebuchadnezzar had carried into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon. Get the picture? They are God’s chosen people, now refugees who have been forcibly relocated in Babylon. And here is what Jeremiah wrote to them: This is what the Lord Almighty, the God of Israel, says to all those I carried into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon: “Build houses and settle down; plant gardens and eat what they produce. Marry and have sons and daughters; find wives for your sons and give your daughters in marriage, so that they too may have sons and daughters. Increase in number there; do not decrease. Also, seek the peace and prosperity of the city to which I have carried you into exile. Pray to the Lord for it, because if it prospers, you too will prosper” (Jeremiah 29:4-7). Jeremiah didn’t say that they should fight to get back to Jerusalem. He didn’t say they should just get by until God provided a way of escape. He said to make the very best of the situation they were in. This was a foreign culture; there was no temple in Babylon; it was a pagan culture, worshipping many false gods. And yet this is where they found themselves—this is where they were planted.
Notice that God told them that he had carried them into exile, not Nebuchadnezzar. This must have been an amazing statement to them. Their God had brought them to this terrible land? Why would God plant them there? It was hostile to their way of life, to their beliefs, to their God. And yet God made it clear that they were to bloom right there in Babylon where they were planted.
I am reminded that we who are Christ-followers are called foreigners and exiles in this world. Peter writes that we should “live out our time as foreigners here in reverent fear.” We are planted here, and while we’re here we should bloom for Jesus. The exiles in Babylon were to build houses, plant gardens marry, increase in number and seek peace and prosperity for the city of Babylon. They were to bloom in Babylon, of all places.
Are you blooming where you are now planted, or have you allowed the circumstances of life to destroy your will to bloom, to steal your joy? I want to encourage you to know that God can cause you to bloom in ways you’ve never imagined, if you will be willing to bloom right where you are planted.
What does it mean to “Bloom where you are planted”? You’ve no doubt heard this expression; in fact, some people think it is in the Bible. No, this saying is not found in the Bible, but the concept it teaches is very biblical.
It begins with the word “bloom” which is a verb—an action word—and it implies that you have to be intentional about this. Blooming means producing something beautiful. So, the first word—bloom—is a directive, something you must do.
Then it says, “where you are.” Do you often have the attitude that you would do so well if only you were in other circumstances? A different job, a better house, a more-understanding mate, better- behaved children, enough money, better health—just give you better circumstances, solve some of your problems, and then you can bloom. Instead of “bloom where you are planted,” maybe you think, “Put me in better soil and then I’ll bloom!”
Some years ago a good friend was planted in a job where some of her coworkers were unfriendly and prejudicial toward her. Instead of lowering herself to their level, or being angry, or vengeful, after much prayer, God led her to begin what she called “Project Love,” intentionally inviting these coworkers to have lunch with her, and in that way breaking down the barriers between them. It wasn’t long before these same people got to know my friend, saw in her the love of Jesus, and soon came to appreciate her and that was the beginning of some long and good friendships. She bloomed where she was.
And the last word in this saying is “planted.” Bloom where you are planted. When something is planted, it is placed there intentionally, right? It’s not just a wildflower springing up on a mountainside. Someone has gone to the trouble of preparing a spot, a place, where this seed can be planted. Being planted implies that something outside of itself had a purpose for putting that plant in that place.
You know, where you are now is where God has planted you. Oh, there may have been all kinds of circumstances, good and bad, that have brought you to the spot where you are now planted, but God has this marvelous way of taking us where we are and preparing the soil for us even there, so that we can bloom where we are planted.
Would you even today pause long enough to just thank God for where you are planted. I know, it could be a tough place, but the Bible says to be thankful in all circumstances, so by faith just thank God for where he has planted you and then ask him to help you bloom in that place.
I wonder if you know where this is found in the Bible: Bloom where you are planted. Is it in the Psalms, or maybe Jesus said it? Do you know? Well, the truth is, you won’t find that exact phrase in the Bible, but you will find the principle it teaches very clearly given in Scripture.
When the Apostle Paul said we should learn to be content no matter what our circumstances, he was saying “Bloom where you are planted.” When Jesus said not to worry about tomorrow because tomorrow would take care of itself, he was saying “Bloom where you are planted.” In writing to the Corinthian Christians, Paul said, “Nevertheless, each person should live as a believer in whatever situation the Lord has assigned to them, just as God has called them” (1 Corinthians 7:17). He was admonishing those new believers to bloom where they were planted.
Not long ago I had an opportunity to talk to a senior citizen, Betty, who is blooming where she is planted. Betty is a widow and a mom of three grown children and lots of grandchildren. She is a Jesus-lover from way back, and at this stage in her life, she is finding creative ways to reach out to others with the love of Jesus.
Betty’s husband died after a very long illness where she was his main caregiver. So she spent many years simply taking care of his needs. Now that she lives alone and is still driving, she has found a way to continue to share the love of Jesus with others. She goes to the grocery store every day. She said, “That way I don’t have heavy bags to carry if I just get a few things each day. And then, I just go up and down the aisles of the store, to see who God puts in my path that day.”
Betty uses her daily trips to the grocery store as a way to meet people, to offer encouragement, to pray for people, and to let them know that Jesus loves them. Almost every day she has an opportunity to speak to someone—mostly strangers—and simply offer a moment of caring and concern. She has story after story of the people she has met in this way, and how blessed she is to have this ministry.
Betty didn’t complain about the effects of growing older, or the fact that she was alone now, or the aches and pains that occur as you age. She is just blooming where she is, bringing joy and a ray of hope to many people who just happen to shop for groceries where she does.
Satan, our enemy, will do anything to keep us from praying. He knows that the more effectively we pray, the more power we will have over him and his demons. Therefore, it should come as no surprise to discover that it is sometimes difficult for us to pray, to believe that prayer really works, and to have any excitement and joy in our prayer life.
This mini-drama I’m presenting will require you to stretch your imagination. It comes from my imagination, but it is all based solidly on Scripture. Sometimes we just need word pictures to help us see the unseen things, the things that are only seen with “forever eyes.” So that is the purpose of this drama.
You must picture a room of grandeur and opulence never imagined on this earth. This room is absolutely gigantic and as you enter, your eyes just cannot begin to take it all in. Everywhere you look there are emeralds, pearls, diamonds—every jewel imaginable. And the floor is made of pure gold, gleaming and glorious. The room is so bright it almost blinds you. And all over this enormous room are angels of such beauty and magnificence that they are indescribable. These angels are huge, with wingspans beyond belief, and their garments shine with a dazzling white light. There is a chorus that sings forever in this room—songs you've never heard before, more glorious than any sound you could possibly imagine.
And in the center of this huge room is a throne, which simply defies description. Nothing our human minds could imagine would ever do it justice. It is huge and impressive beyond belief. And all around this throne are myriads and untold numbers of angels praising and guarding the One who sits on the throne, God the Creator.
Now, you must picture me entering this throne room. As I come into the room, my appearance is in stark contrast to all around. I look like a scruffy kid, without any glory and beauty. I'm so insignificant in comparison to everything else going on in this incredible room that I could easily get trampled on without notice.
But as I start to enter, someone does notice me. It's the head angel, the one in charge of keeping everything just perfect. He walks up to me and says,
Angel: Excuse me, but who are you? I think you must be lost—surely you're not planning to enter our throne room.
Mary: Well, I know that I appear very insignificant and a bit out of place compared to everyone else, but yes, I was planning to enter.
Angel: How can you be so presumptuous? What were you going to do in the throne room?
Mary: Well, you see, I plan to go right up to the throne and talk to God.
Angel: Oh, my, that would be funny if it were not so arrogant on your part. You're planning to go directly up to the throne and talk to God? My dear, look at you. Do you think God wants to talk to you? He's very busy you know—and there are many more important things on his agenda today.
Mary: Oh, sir, I realize that and I know that it seems entirely inappropriate for me to approach his throne, but you see, he has given me a personal invitation. As a matter of fact, he has said I that may come into his presence anytime I wish, and—you really will have a hard time believing this—he said I could approach his throne with boldness.
Angel: With boldness? But look at you. You're not worthy of being in his presence. Do you see all these angels here—they wouldn't just walk up to his throne with boldness.
Mary: I know, sir, but you see, I'm not an angel, I'm his child.
Angel: His child?
Mary: Yes, isn't that incredible—I'm His child. I would have been satisfied to just be one of his worshippers from afar, but he told me that since I accepted his Son as my Savior, I'm no longer an alien, I am now his child. He has told me I can call him Father.
Angel: Father? Can this be true? You would call God, the Creator of the entire universe, whom the angels worship in fear and splendor—you would dare to call him Father?
Prayer is the linchpin of the Christian life and the more effectively you pray, the more powerful your life will be for God.
Remember, there are all kinds of prayers, as Paul wrote to the Ephesians: “And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests” (Ephesians 6:18). Our private prayer time will have a different nature than corporate prayer. We need to be aware of what is appropriate in a group setting versus our personal prayers.
In Matthew 6:8 Jesus is again teaching on prayer and he says don’t try to impress God with many words like pagans do. God is not impressed with lengthy prayers. Lengthy prayers do not carry more weight with God just because they are long. We also need to be careful that we don’t get into “vain repetitions,” which can happen if we just repeat the same phrases and clichés in every prayer without truly thinking of what we’re saying.
Phillips Brooks has written: “Prayer is not conquering God’s reluctances but taking hold of God’s willingness.” We don’t pray to try to persuade God to do what we want him to do. We pray so that we can align ourselves with his purposes in our lives and take hold of all he wants to do for us and through us.
Prayer is for our benefit. God has no need-to-know. We don’t have to educate him; he knows everything before we ask him or tell him. But when we bring our needs and petitions and praise to God, we show him and remind ourselves that we are letting go of the controls of our lives and giving them to the Lord. We are presenting our cares to God, not to inform him of our need, but to demonstrate our trust in him. To show that we recognize our inability and trust his ability.
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What I've learned from other godly people who seem to have power in their prayer life is that, first, they are disciplined about praying. And secondly, they have developed a structure for their prayer life that enables them to pray more effectively. Jesus taught his disciples how to pray, and we need to learn as well. So, I've been sharing some ideas that can help you pray more powerfully.
Praying Scripture
Have you learned the joy and effectiveness of praying Scripture? I recommend this highly because it is truly powerful praying. How do you pray Scripture, you ask? There are several ways.
First, as you are reading from the Bible, stop and pray back what you read. For example, I was reading Psalm 39 and like so many of the Psalms, it is a beautiful prayer. I prayed, “Lord, show me my life’s end and the number of my days. Remind me of how brief and fleeting is my life, and therefore help me to be focused on what is eternally important and not be swallowed up with the affairs of this world.” You see how a Scripture passage can guide you to a very effective prayer.
There are wonderful praise prayers in the Bible which you can use for your own. As you find them, write them in a prayer journal and use them. There are prayers for others that really improve the way you pray for friends and family. For example, pray Philippians 1:9 for people you know and love: "And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless until the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ—to the glory and praise of God.”
I pray Philippians 4:8 often: "Today, Lord, help me to think only what is true, noble, right, pure, lovely and admirable.” It's very important to pray about your thought life. I pray on the armor of God as outlined in Ephesians 6.
These are just examples of praying Scripture, and it will energize your prayer life immensely.
Jesus taught us how to pray and we should therefore pray as he taught us. That makes sense to me, how about you?
We’ve looked at the first two components of The Lord’s Prayer:
Praise: "Our Father, Which art in heaven, hallowed be your name" Pledge: "Your kingdom come; your will be done on earth as in heaven."
Then we come to:
Petition: "Give us this day our daily bread"
We are told over and over again in Scripture to bring our requests to God, to cast our burdens on him, to tell him what we need, to knock, seek and ask. He is our Heavenly Father, and he loves for us to petition him. That petition time should include our own needs and those of many others. We need to spend a great deal of time in intercessory petition, praying for the needs of others.
Then we need a time of penitence:
Penitence: "Forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.”
During confession we need to be very specific and very honest with God. You can’t hide anything from him anyway, so it is far better to get all your dirty laundry out on in the open, confess your sins, naming them one by one, and finding his wonderful forgiveness and cleansing. And as we ask for forgiveness, we have to be willing to extend forgiveness to those who have wronged us.
Then Jesus closed his pattern for prayer with a:
Pleading: “And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil."
Surely we need to invoke and plead for God’s protection from the evil that surrounds us every day of our lives. We need to put on the armor of God so that we are able to stand against the evil one, and pray that God will help us to resist Satan and all his temptations.
So, those five words describe what prayer needs to contain in order to pray the way Jesus taught us to. It should always begin with praise, then our pledge to God, then present our petitions to him, come with a penitent heart for our sins and plead for his protection.
I’m not sure the sequence is essential, except beginning and ending with praise is always good. But your prayer time needs to cover these five areas because that’s how Jesus taught us to pray.
The disciples asked Jesus to teach them how to pray, and he did. Obviously, if they needed to learn, so do we. So, I'm sharing a few thoughts on how to structure your prayer time for more effective praying.
Here are my simple first-step suggestions to enroll you in Prayer 101:
First, follow the model Jesus gave us for prayer. You'll find it in Matthew 6 and Luke 11. Briefly, The Lord's Prayer teaches us that prayer should contain:
Praise: "Our Father, Which art in heaven, hallowed be your name" Pledge: "Your kingdom come; your will be done on earth as in heaven." Petition: "Give us this day our daily bread" Penitence: "Forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.” Pleading: “And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil."
Let’s look at each of those briefly.
Praise is essential to an effective prayer life. Every prayer session should begin with praise, as Jesus taught us to do. A large portion of your prayer time needs to be devoted to praise, because this is how you redirect your thoughts to God and get them off yourself. Believe me, that is a most important step in having a meaningful time of prayer.
Praise God for who he is, reciting his attributes and characteristics. Praise him for what he has done, recalling his many benefits to you. Praise the Triune God, Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Let your mind and heart dwell on the nature of God until your mind is filled up with God.
Then you are prepared to pledge yourself to the God of creation and commit your life to his control. I find it very helpful to pray back Scripture verses which I’ve written in my prayer journal—verses of dedication and commitment. For example, Romans 12:1 and 2 can be prayed as a dedication of your body as a living sacrifice. It is your pledge to God that you are giving him control for the day ahead.
During this pledge time, you are asking that the will of God be done in your life and giving God permission to write the agenda for your life and your day. It is a pledge between you and God
How many sermons have you heard on prayer? How many books have you read on prayer? It has always been and it always will be a topic to be discussed and an activity to be inspired because prayer is the linchpin of our Christian life. Without it our spiritual wheels tend to fall off and we get nowhere.
Yet, studies tell us that few Christians—I’m talking about true believers in Jesus Christ who have been born from above and found new life in Christ—few really have a significant and effective prayer life. Why? Well, there are many answers to the question of why we don’t pray more. One reason is it takes discipline and many haven’t learned to be disciplined. That means you have to designate a time for prayer each day and stick to it. Another reason is that prayer has a low priority in our schedules. We leave it for “leftover” time instead of making sure it gets done first.
And then another key reason we don’t have effective prayer lives is because we haven’t learned how to pray effectively. Prayer is something to be learned. We know that because Jesus’ disciples asked him to teach them how to pray, and he did. He gave them a format for prayer which we have called the Lord’s Prayer.
Do you follow that format for your own prayer life? Don’t you think that if Jesus taught us to pray in that way, we should? That doesn’t mean you quote the Lord’s Prayer every day, but you structure your prayer to have the same components as our Lord taught.
Prayer is something you learn to do and get better at doing the more you practice it and learn about it. In our business lives, we wouldn't dare "wing it" with an important sales presentation, where a big order was at stake. When something is important to our lives, we plan and prepare and give it a lot of attention. Yet, many Christians approach prayer very carelessly and undisciplined, and then wonder why their prayers seem lifeless and humdrum.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Gratitude is something we hear a lot about, even in mainstream culture. As followers of Jesus, a posture of gratitude is critical as we grow in our faith and in intimacy with God. But often gratitude can be an afterthought or based on our feelings or circumstances, rather than a regular practice as a follower of Christ. I want to spend some time on the importance of gratitude and why it’s like the air we breathe, we can’t live and have a thriving faith without it.
Before we dive in, I have a question for you. If you were to rate yourself on the God gratitude meter, 1 being, “I rarely express gratitude,'' to 5, “I give God thanks daily for specific things I am grateful for,” where would you rank? 1, 5, somewhere in between? When was the last time you expressed thankfulness to God? What did you specifically thank him for?
In all honesty, over the years I have been hit or miss in my gratitude practice. I didn’t really have a plan or discipline in place. Now that may sound funny. Do we need a plan? A gratitude practice? Is gratitude really a spiritual discipline? I would say, yes.
At the beginning of this year, I vowed to keep a daily gratitude journal. While I have done this in the past if I am honest, my daily practice of gratitude tends to peter out pretty quickly.
This year has been different. I have made gratitude a spiritual discipline, taking time every morning and making a thoughtful and specific list for all of the things I am thankful for as I reflect on the previous day. Over time, with consistency and commitment, gratitude has turned into a daily habit. And it has been a game-changer in my faith life. This really shouldn’t be surprising to us because all throughout Scripture we see the call to gratitude and thankfulness and we see the impact of a lack of it.
So why can we find it difficult to be grateful? I think one reason is because we often let our circumstances and not God’s faithfulness dictate our gratitude. We count on our circumstances to elicit feelings of thankfulness, and when things don’t go our way we withhold it. Or worse, we grumble. One of the many examples of the absence of gratitude and the propensity towards grumbling is found in the book of Exodus. In the book of Exodus, we learn that the Israelites had been enslaved in Egypt for 400 years. For four centuries generation after generation was subjected to hard labor, horrible oppression, and unpleasant living conditions. They lived being daily mastered and ruled by the Egyptians.
I will share a few highlights from Exodus but I highly recommend reading the entire book on your own. And, even though this story may sound familiar to you, I invite you to ask God what he wants to illuminate for you. Ask Holy Spirit, “Is there an area of my life that I am forgetting to be thankful? How am I like the Israelites?” Ask, “Lord, what do you want to teach me through your Word about grumbling and gratitude?”
As the story unfolds throughout Exodus we see how God goes through extreme measures to bring freedom to his people. The culmination of ten plagues appear to finally cause Pharaoh to relent and release the Israelites from slavery. And after Pharaoh lets them go, God leads the Israelites along the road to the wilderness. Exodus 13:21-22 tells us, “By day the Lord went ahead of them in a pillar of cloud to guide them on their way and by night in a pillar of fire to give them light, so that they could travel by day or night. Neither the pillar of cloud by day nor the pillar of fire by night left its place in front of the people.”
Don’t miss that. In the midst of their difficult circumstances God’s presence never left them. He was visibly with them guiding every step. It is the same with you. You may not get to actually see a manifestation of God’s presence but he is always by your side and leading you, even when you feel like you are being pursued by your enemies,
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Have you ever experienced an overwhelming sense of anxiety?
Anxiety has been something that has reared its unsettling head in my life for the past several years. I had never really experienced anxiety and now, it can come in long waves. Staring a major life changing decision in the face caused unrelenting anxiety and restless and sleepless nights. I would wake up feeling sweaty and heavy and my eyes had not even been open more than a second.
When anxiety tries to get the best of you, go to the Word, pray, text or phone a friend to talk things through and ask for prayer. At the onset of worry and anxiety, I called my friend Lisa and shared with her that I was really struggling. She graciously created a safe space for me to share all of the thoughts that were invading my mind. Sometimes it can help to find a trustworthy friend who will just listen. When we verbalize what is causing worry and concern, sometimes it can lose a little bit of its power. She graciously listened and said “Girl, I don’t have the answer to your dilemma but have you worshiped?”
With that question, she responded with humility, love, and truth. A tender reminder that in those moments of life when you feel overwhelmed—turn to worship and gratitude.
In Philippians the Apostle Paul instructs us, “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:6-7 NLT).
The first thing I want to point out is the fact that Paul even talks about anxiety! If he is addressing it, surely people were experiencing it. Sometimes I think we can feel as if we are alone and the only ones who experience anxiousness. Or perhaps we feel like something is wrong with us when we feel waves of anxiety coming on. But Paul reminds us that there will be times when we feel anxious, and he points us to truth and who to turn to in those moments.
When you are anxious, pray. Tell God what you need. His Word says that he inclines his ear toward you. Thank him, express your gratitude for who he is and all he has done in your life. It can sound trite but it is truth. When you do, God promises you will experience peace.
(Click here if you would like to print a pdf of the devotional for this week.)
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Being grateful really is an attitude of the heart and a will of the mind. It requires a deliberate effort, a commitment to focus our attention and thoughts on who God is and all of the evidence of his faithfulness throughout our lives. When we are going through a challenging or uncertain season, it is easy to forget God’s character. When we are riding high, and life feels like it is smooth sailing, we are prone to do this same. We can tend to take all of the credit and forget that it is God who has provided and not merely our own self effort. So whether your current season feels like you are in a valley or on a mountaintop, remembering God and his faithfulness is essential.
In the book of Joshua we see a powerful example of remembering, and the call to gratitude.
After wandering in the wilderness for 40 years Joshua is positioned to lead the Israelites into the Promised Land. The Israelites endured an immense number of trials, tribulation, and trauma along the journey. Yet through it all and in the midst of their 40-year trek to freedom, God was with them every step of the way. We see that their long season of wandering comes to an end as they come to the Jordan River. God makes a way for them to pass through as he leads them to the land he promised, the land flowing with milk and honey.
After the people of Israel supernaturally crossed the Jordan River to enter the Promised Land, God commanded Joshua to “choose twelve men, one from each tribe. Tell them, ‘Take twelve stones from the very place where the priests are standing in the middle of the Jordan. Carry them out and pile them up at the place where you will camp tonight’” (Joshua 4:2-3).
Then Joshua (4:6-7) says, “Let this be a sign among you. When your children ask in time to come, ‘What do those stones mean to you?’ then you shall tell them that the waters of the Jordan were cut off before the ark of the covenant of the Lord. When it passed over the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan were cut off. So these stones shall be to the people of Israel a memorial forever.”
The stones were set up in Gilgal as a reminder to that generation and the generations to come of what the Lord had done, to trigger a memory of God’s faithfulness in the past, to reflect on him in the present, and trust him in the future, to invoke a heart of gratitude.
How are you remembering Jesus and expressing gratitude for his faithfulness today? To remember, you have to intentionally look. We can get so mired and fixed on the pain, uncertainty, and current hardship or struggle that we forget to take the time to reflect and recall all of the ways that God has been faithful. It can be easy to forget. How can you create your own stone of memorial, your own reminder that God is faithful, that his promises never fail?
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Let’s look at an extravagant response of gratitude by an unnamed woman whose story is told in the gospel of Mark.
Now Jesus was in Bethany, in the home of Simon, a man Jesus had healed of leprosy. And as he was reclining at the table, a woman came into the house, with an alabaster flask filled with the highest quality of fragrant and expensive oil. She came to Jesus, and with a gesture of extreme devotion, she broke the flask and poured out the precious oil over his head (Mark 14:3-9).
In other words, she came to Jesus in a response and act of extreme gratitude!
After this selfless display we see the disciples highly indignant, and in an uproar they question how this woman could waste such an expensive bottle of oil which would have been the equivalent to a whole year’s worth of wages.
Listen to how Jesus responds:
“Leave her alone! Why are you so critical of this woman? She has honored me with this beautiful act of kindness….She has done all that she could to honor me. I promise you that as this wonderful gospel spreads all over the world, the story of her lavish devotion to me will be mentioned in memory of her” (Mark 14:7, 8-9).
We do not know much about this woman, what her life was like or the story of her past. But surely we can surmise that she experienced the saving power and extravagant love of Jesus. And experiencing the extravagant love of her Savior caused her to have an extravagant response towards that love. Her display of extreme devotion and thankfulness to God was so significant that nothing, not even facing the shame, scorn and ridicule of men, was going to stop her from this heartfelt act.
Her act of gratitude towards Jesus was so noteworthy that it is recorded in the Bible for billions of people to read and for us to read as an example 2000 years later.
And Jesus says that as the Gospel spreads, her story of lavish devotion will be told.
When you know how incredibly loved you are by God, more than a head knowledge, but a deep knowing that penetrates your mind, heart, and soul—when you know this love, you can’t help but respond the same way she did. This unnamed woman’s wordless display of gratefulness, her act of worship, is an example for me and for you.
How are you showing your extravagant gratitude for who Jesus is and for what he has done in your life?
The unnamed woman’s act of worship was anointing Jesus’ head with oil. What will be your act of worship and gratitude?
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
I don’t know about you but I think we have a love problem.
In my personal experience and as I minister to hundreds of women, there is a common theme, a common underlying question that I think we are all trying to get the answer to. Does God really love me? Now I am not talking about being able to rehearse Bible verses about God’s love (although that is very important). What I am referring to is experiencing and receiving God’s love and affection to the degree that it seeps into the depths of your heart, soul, and mind. I am talking about being convinced to the core of your being that you are deeply loved by God. Are you absolutely convinced that God’s affections for you are great? I struggle to believe and fully receive Jesus’ steadfast love. I am guessing you do too.
I was celebrating a friend’s birthday this weekend and all of the guests went around the table and shared one thing that drew us to her. That was an easy answer for me…. My friend is absolutely convinced that Jesus loves her. She has such confidence in his affection for her, it is very endearing and inspiring. And by the way she lives her life, you can tell she receives God’s love, to her very core.
Why do we often fail to receive and believe in God's love? I mean, evidence of his love is all throughout the Bible.
First John 3:1 says, “See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God!”
As a child of God, he lavishes his love on you. And you did nothing to earn his love. God’s greatest act of love towards you was sacrificing his son. Jesus’ death on the cross was the grandest display of love the world has ever seen. And yet, we have a hard time receiving.
One of my favorite prayers in the Bible is Paul’s prayer in Ephesians 3. Receive these words as a prayer over you and open yourself up to allow them to penetrate your heart. “For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God” (Ephesians 3:14-19). Take time to just sit and be grateful to God. Tell Jesus, “Thank you that your love for me is so extravagant, help me to fully receive your love and help me be your love to those around me.”
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
When you are in the midst of a hard season in life, what is your reaction? When things are not going the way you had planned or when suffering comes your way, how do you respond? Does your heart grow cold to God, distanced, or weary? Or is gratitude the posture of your heart in the midst of suffering?
I have been reading the book of Job, and to be reminded of the loss, suffering, and pain he experienced while all the while staying faithful to God is astounding. It is counterintuitive to praise God in the middle of our pain, but that is exactly what Job did and it floors me every time I read his story. Job chapter 1 tells us that Job was a man of perfect integrity who feared God and turned away from evil. His life was marked by his faithfulness to God.
One day Satan challenges the authenticity of Job’s faith and declares that the reason he is faithful is because God has provided for him abundantly and protected him and everything he owns. Satan challenges Job’s loyalty to the Lord and tells God, “But stretch out your hand and strike everything he owns, and he will surely curse you to your face” (Job 1:11). God essentially gives Satan permission to test Job’s faith and as we read, everything that Job has is taken from him, starting with the death of his children and servants and the loss of his livestock which was his livelihood. Everything, gone. His family and everything he worked so hard for vanished.
This is Job’s response:
“Then Job stood up, tore his robe, and shaved his head. He fell to the ground and worshiped, saying, “Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked I will leave this life. The Lord gives, and The Lord takes away. Praise the name of Yaweh” (Job 1:20-21).
And as we read further, we learn that “Throughout all this Job did not sin or blame God for anything” (Job 1:22).
Job’s gratitude for God transformed his response to God when his life seemed unbearable and like it was caving in. We can learn a lot about others by how they respond to God when life gets hard. We learn a lot about ourselves. Will we cling to him, show gratitude for who God is and his faithfulness during difficult times? Or will we become distant and bitter towards God? Job lost almost everything dear to him, yet he expressed trust in God even when his heart was breaking.
Would you respond the same way? What difficult situation are you currently facing? How can you respond like Job, falling to the ground in worship? Praise God in the midst of your pain, and remember the character of God and refuse to forget that he is faithful. He is for you. He is with you.
I love to read old books, and I’ve recently been reading a collection of readings from some time-tested authors. One particular article recently caught my attention. You would have thought it was written yesterday, for it speaks so clearly to us today.
It is entitled “How to Change One’s Habits,” and the sentence which jumped off the page to me was: “Could the young but realize how soon they will become mere walking bundles of habits, they would give more heed to their conduct while in the plastic state.” Walking bundles of habits—what a clear picture that gives us of ourselves, does it not? Obviously, those can be good habits or bad habits, or some mixture of both, but I have to acknowledge that I am to a large degree a collection of the habits that I’ve established in my life.
I want to talk about our “bundle of habits” and how we can add good ones and get rid of harmful ones.
You know, when you first start a habit that is harmful, you don’t intend for it to become a habit. We see how so many have become addicted to pornography, especially on the internet. This is a devastatingly bad and evil habit, but my guess is that the person who first goes to one of those pornographic internet sites tells himself or herself they are doing it simply out of curiosity—just want to see what it’s like. And then one time leads to another and another and before they know it, they’re hooked.
Someone has said, “Chains of habit are too light to be felt until they are too heavy to be broken.” If we dealt with our harmful habits in the beginning stages, we could pretty easily break them. This author calls it the “plastic state”—that period of time when breaking that habit wouldn’t be too hard to do. But the longer you allow it to continue, the more likely it will become part of your bundle of habits and then it’s very difficult to overcome.
Speaking of ancient authors, the Apostle Paul addressed this issue in his letter to the Romans. He said, “Don’t you know that when you offer yourselves to someone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one you obey—whether you are slaves to sin, which leads to death, or to obedience, which leads to righteousness? . . . Just as you used to offer the parts of your body in slavery to impurity and to ever-increasing wickedness, so now offer them in slavery to righteousness leading to holiness.” (Romans 6:16, 19)
In other words, since we are all creatures of habit and walking bundles of habit, we need to make certain that those habits lead to holiness and righteousness. Unfortunately, many times we’re controlled by bad habits. If you truly want to break a bad habit—and you have to really want to do it—begin by specifically praying about that habit.
Whether it’s what we may classify as an innocent bad habit or one that is recognized as harmful, if you are addicted to it and it’s not good for you, ask God to give you strength to overcome it. Then in order to break that habit, you need to replace it with a good habit. Habit is overcome by habit. As Paul wrote to the Romans, you and I choose whether we will be a slave to sin or a slave to righteousness—whether we will incorporate habits that are wrong or replace them with good habits.
The first part is the hardest part—getting started. You have to stop talking about it and start doing it. As Jesus said, “Now that you know these things, you are blessed if you do them” (John 13:17). The blessing is in the doing. So, how do you get started when you want to break a bad habit? After praying about it, you need to determine what new habit you will use to overcome the bad habit. Remember, habit is overcome by habit.
For example, if you watch too much television or see too many movies that are not good for you, what new thing will you do to replace the time you used to spend watching the wrong things? You could get some Christian movies to replace them; you could find a good book to read instead of watching a screen.
You know, all of us have missing pieces in our lives: those things we really desire and long for but for some reason, we just don't have them. They can be little things or big ones, but they sit there in the back of your mind, always gnawing at you a little, and you feel like something important is really missing. Now the key issue for us as believers is how do we handle these missing pieces? As I see it, you have several options open to you.
You can become obsessed with what's missing and devote all your energy and time to trying to find that missing piece, trying to get what you think is essential for your happiness and fulfillment. When that happens, you become a self-focused person, and if you'll notice, people who are self-focused are usually pretty miserable. And obviously, that self-centered attitude is sinful and will be harmful to your spiritual life.
You may become bitter and angry about the missing piece. Has that happened to you? Let me just briefly remind you that bitterness always backfires on you and turns you into an unlovely and unhappy person. When you start to feel that it's unfair that you don't have what others have and you've been dealt a rotten hand, then you've become bitter.
Or you can learn to accept the missing piece and focus your life on what you do have and the good things God has done for you. Eventually you can even thank God for the missing piece because you realize that through it you have come to know him better.
I can relate to all three reactions, because I've done them all. For ten years I was obsessed with my missing piece, and let me tell you, those were ten tough years. Often I found myself feeling bitter and angry that others, seemingly less deserving, had what I wanted so badly.
But I finally turned the missing piece over to the Lord, and God gave me many other things to fill up the space, and showed me that without that missing piece, I would never have known him as I should. And knowing God better and better is the bottom-line answer to all our missing pieces.
How are you dealing with the missing pieces in your life? Well, I want to encourage you to start learning to thank God for them. And I want to urge you to make getting to know God better your highest priority.
(Click here if you would like to download the devotional for this week.)
Everybody has missing pieces, don't we? For some, it's a marriage you've always wanted but don't have. Or a child that has not yet been given to you. Or a job you want, or financial security. These missing pieces are different for each of us.
But we can learn to be thankful even for the missing pieces. Paul advised us to give thanks in all circumstances, and we truly need to learn to do that. But if there is some key missing piece in your life right now, you may be thinking, "I don't feel like giving thanks for this missing piece.”
Well, isn't it great that Paul didn't tell us we had to feel like it! In Hebrews 13:15 we read: Through Jesus, therefore, let us continually offer to God a sacrifice of praise—the fruit of lips that confess his name. When we don't feel like being thankful, we can still offer a sacrifice of praise. A sacrifice of praise is, I believe, when we praise and thank God against all our feelings, in spite of our feelings.
How do you do that? You speak words of thankfulness and praise. Words are the fruit of your lips, and this verse in Hebrews tells us to use that fruit as a sacrifice of praise. It's hard to do that, I know. You feel like a hypocrite when you start saying things you don't feel, I know. But you are obeying biblical principles by offering a sacrifice of praise.
When I find myself in that predicament, I begin by telling the Lord that I don't feel like it. But I confirm that I am offering these words of thanksgiving in obedience to Scripture, by faith not by feelings, and then I say those words of thanksgiving, even if they come through clenched teeth! God will honor our willingness to obey him; he will see that sacrifice of praise, and he will be pleased.
Interestingly, once I start to speak the words of thankfulness for the missing pieces in my life, then the feelings usually follow. It helps to think of your will as the engine on your train, and your emotions and feelings as the caboose. If the will is out in front of your emotions, you'll be okay. But if the emotions start dictating to the will, then you'll find yourself in constant turmoil.
So, though you may not feel happy about those missing pieces, you still can feel thankful, knowing that the God of all the Universe is in control of your life and cares about you. And he has promised to turn your ashes into beauty.
Do you think it's realistic for us to be able to thank God for the missing pieces of our lives? I believe not only is it realistic, it's the only way we'll know real peace and contentment in our lives.
God began showing me a few years ago that the missing pieces were actually a blessing. Why? Because without them I might have been lulled into thinking I was self-sufficient and never seen my true needy state.
I recognized that the missing pieces of my life had eventually driven me back to God, and as a result, God was able to take the brokenness of my life and use even me for his glory. I could see that it was because of the missing pieces that I now have the ministry I have and the joy of knowing that there is eternal purpose and meaning in my daily life. And I began, slowly, to thank God for the missing pieces.
Now, let me assure you that God is not expecting us to celebrate the missing pieces, to leap for joy, to throw a party, to pretend it doesn't hurt or matter. But he is asking us to be thankful even for the missing pieces, to understand that those areas of emptiness and unfulfillment can become instruments of grace in our lives.
I'm sure you've heard these verses before, but we need to be reminded of what Paul wrote us concerning thankfulness:
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18: Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.
Ephesians 5:19-20: Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.
Please remember that the man who wrote these words had many missing pieces in his life. He was persecuted severely, put in prison, unable to go where he wanted to go—there were many things in his life that were not easy to swallow or understand. Yet, he still says we should give thanks in all circumstances.
I want to encourage you today, if you're struggling with the missing pieces of your life, to just thank God for them. You may not feel thankful but do it anyway as an act of obedience and love to Jesus. That's the first step you need to take in order to find fulfillment in spite of the missing pieces.
All of us have something that's missing, don't we? What I've come to learn—and am still learning—is that instead of being controlled by the missing pieces, I can be thankful for them. I emphasize that I am learning this principle of being thankful for the missing pieces. But as I've started to grasp this truth, I've found such freedom and contentment.
I'd like to share a poem with you, which really helped me start down this road of being thankful for the missing pieces. I first read it several years ago, and I re-read it quite often. The poem uses old-fashioned words, but the truth is still very relevant: An easy thing, O power Divine,
To thank Thee for these gifts of Thine!
For summer's sunshine, winter's snow,
For hearts that kindle, thoughts that glow;
But when shall I attain to this:
To thank Thee for the things I miss?
For all young fancy's early gleams,
The dreamed-of joys that still are dreams,
Hopes unfulfilled, and pleasures known
Through others' fortunes, not my own,
And blessings seen that are not given,
And ne'er will be - this side of heaven.
Had I, too, shared the joys I see,
Would there have been a heaven for me?
Could I have felt Thy presence near
Had I possessed what I held dear?
My deepest fortune, highest bliss,
Have grown, perchance, from things I miss.
Sometimes there comes an hour of calm;
Grief turns to blessing, pain to balm;
A Power that works above my will
Still leads me onward, upward still;
And then my heart attains to this:
To thank Thee for the things I miss.
-Thomas Wentworth Higginson When I first read this poem, I began to ask myself, "Where would you be today if you had everything you wanted, if there were no missing pieces in your life?” And it was as though God drew back a curtain to let me see how having everything I wanted could have been disastrous for me.
Did you ever think about that? Without some of those missing pieces in your life, where do you think you would be? Isn't it true that often the missing pieces are the things that draw us into a close and trusting relationship with our Heavenly Father?
Have you ever met anyone who truly "had it all"? I doubt it; in fact, I'm quite certain that no one has everything they want. I want to talk about the missing pieces of our lives. I have some in my life, and I'm certain you do, too. What are those missing pieces, those things you really want but you don't have?
You know, I've been noticing lately that a lot of people are truly handicapped over the missing pieces in their lives. Whatever it is that is not there in their life's puzzle, they have become obsessed with it, it controls their thought life, and it keeps them from enjoying or appreciating the good things they do have.
I was talking with a friend who has been married quite a few years, and has always wanted children, but she has not been able to have her own. That's a painful missing piece, and she was sharing the pain with me. But even though she recognizes that an important piece is missing, she hastened to add: "But, Mary, I have so much to be thankful for. My life is still full and meaningful," and she began to recite the good things—the pieces that are not missing from her life.
I said to her, "Do you realize how unusual you are? While you acknowledge that a key piece is missing from your life, and is likely to always be missing, you are focused on what is not missing.” In fact, in all the years I've known her, she has never allowed that missing piece to rob her of joy or to keep her from being involved in helping and doing for others. And she's even able to rejoice with her friends who do have their own children, without jealousy or envy.
How about you today? Have the missing pieces of your life become so overwhelming that you cannot see or appreciate what you do have? For ten years I allowed what I thought was a major missing piece in my life to control me. I felt that I had to be married for life to be complete, so I was consumed with finding the right person to marry. My obsession with this missing piece led me away from the Lord, away from biblical principles, into a life that was self-focused and sinful.
Quite frankly, when we are obsessed with what's missing, instead of being thankful for what we have, we usually do become self-focused and our fellowship with God is damaged.
I can tell you from experience that being obsessed with what's missing in your life is a miserable way to live. I want to encourage you to see those missing pieces from an entirely different perspective. To even be able to thank God for the missing pieces.
The good news is that we, as believers in Jesus Christ, have been set free from the curse of sin and our attitude toward work and toward our jobs can be redeemed from that curse. Here’s how:
We must work at the job God has given us and carry the Kingdom of God to our jobs every day.
Let’s look at the first part: Work at the job God has given us:
Work is assigned by God.
In Genesis 1 and 2 we see the first work assignment given by God to Adam. Genesis 2:15 tells us "The Lord God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it." Work had a central place, even in paradise. It was intended as a gift and a blessing before sin and punishment entered the picture.
And keep this in mind: Adam's job was not secular; it was a sacred trust from God, and it was meant to bring purpose and fulfillment to Adam. The same is true today. The nature of the work we do does not determine if it is sacred or not. It does not depend upon who signs our paycheck. Work is sacred when it is assigned by God.
Now, I ask you to think of your own work situation, whether you're in the work force or working without a paycheck! Has your work been assigned to you by God? Are you confident that you are in the job God wants you to be in? God doesn't ask us what we want to do. He assigns us work.
Ephesians 2:10 tells us: "For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”
In our humanistic society we have some convoluted ideas about our rights. It is quite common for people to assume that they have a right to pursue whatever makes them happy, whatever interests them, whatever brings fulfillment into their lives, and if they think about God at all, they see him in heaven to enhance and accelerate their progress. It may come as a surprise to hear that God is not here to make you feel fulfilled in the career or work that you choose. As a believer, you are here to do the good work that he has prepared for you to do.
So, when you go to God for your work assignment, you should not ask for the easy place, the nice place, the well-paying place. Rather you should ask for the job that he has chosen in advance for you to do; the place where he plans to use you in his Kingdom work.
Now, keep in mind that God may have you in a job in order to do his work. The job itself may simply be the vehicle he has chosen to put you in the place to do the good works he has planned for you to do. The actual job duties may not always be the meaningful part of your work—frequently they are not. Instead, that job opens a door for you to be a part of a world where God wants to use you.
God is the Universal Business Owner and Manager
The authority lines are also clearly drawn in this working relationship with God. He's the boss and as his worker, you are to be submissive to his authority. He is a benevolent dictator; it's not a democracy. Democracies, in case you haven't noticed, don't work all that well. But in a working relationship with God, you don't have to worry about your authority figure. He is the perfect manager and can be totally trusted. Everything he does is for your good.
You are a coworker with God.
As originally intended by God, you are to be engaged in your work as a partner with him. Look again at the first work assignment as given to Adam; God never left him alone. God was always there with him. It was a partnership.
God intended for us to be coworkers with him. He is a "hands-on" manager; he never leaves you or forsakes you. What a deal! He assigns you the work, works beside you all the way, and carries you through to completion. What more could you ask for in a working relationship with your Boss?
Now, let’s look at the second part: We are to work at the job God has given us and carry the Kingdom of God to our jobs every day.
We pray: "Thy kingdom come, thy will be done in earth as it is in heaven.
(presented by Lisa Bishop)
Having trustworthy companions is essential, and especially important when you find yourself charting change and new territory in your career, a relationship, with family, and in life.
It can be so easy to pull the plug on community and to hide when life gets hard and feels uncertain. But it is ever so important to phone a friend, someone who you can confide in, count on to listen, trust to keep confidentiality, and encourage you with truth.
Our minds can tend to ruminate on negative thoughts when uncertainty looms. To counter the tendency to fall down a rabbit’s hole and take a mental tailspin, it is important to stay grounded in God’s Word, be ever present in prayer and rely on your friends to help pull you up when all you can think about is worst case scenarios.
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 gives us a great reminder about the importance of community:
Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.
These verses highlight the importance of Christian friendships. Companions that put God at the center of their lives will help you navigate life and change in a godly way, keeping you focused on truth, and that is the best and most fruitful way. When life is hard it can be so easy to forget God’s faithfulness. We need our friends as faithful guides.
Who is a friend you can rely on when you feel the road ahead is a blur? Reach out to them, ask them if they will listen. Tell them you need their help to encourage you in truth and pray for you as you navigate change. And if you know someone who is currently in a tough season, who can you be a friend and encouragement to?
You will have to stay flexible, faithful, and hopeful. It can be easy to get discouraged and fearful. This is the time to, as the Apostle Paul says in Romans 12:12, be faithful…be persistent in prayer.
Rather than staring at your circumstances, keep your eyes fixed on Jesus.
(Click here to download the message for the entire week.)
(presented by Lisa Bishop)
For some of us change is invigorating and for others it can feel intimidating. For some change feels adventurous, and for others, well, we like what feels safe, comfortable and predictable. What is your reaction when you experience change?
When I think about change, I think about the story of Moses in the book of Exodus. As a bit of a refresher, when Moses is shepherding his father-in-law’s flock in the far side of the wilderness, he comes to Horeb, the mountain of God. The angel of the Lord appears to him in a bush that is burning but not consumed by the fire. God calls out to Moses from the bush, tells him that he has observed his people enduring suffering and oppression from the Egyptians and tells Moses that he is the one God will use to free the Israelites from Egypt and bring them into the promised land. Reacting out of fear Moses says, “Who am I that I should go to Pharaoh and that I should bring the Israelites out of Egypt?” God responds, “I will certainly be with you” (Exodus 3:11-12).
Needless to say, from this point on, Moses’s life is altered, the course of his life is changed forever.
As the story unfolds and as Moses’s fear of future confrontations with Pharaoh builds, his faith also waivers. He mutters, “Pardon your servant, Lord. I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue.” God’s rebuttal is strong and he says, “Who gave human beings their mouths? Who makes them deaf or mute? Who gives them sight or makes them blind? Is it not I, the Lord? Now go; I will help you speak and will teach you what to say” (Exodus 4:10-12). Even with this strong assurance from the Lord, Moses still pleads for God to pass him over and use someone else for the challenge ahead.
You may be asking, “What does this have to do with navigating change in my life?” I am glad you asked. You see, there may be times in life when you are called to make a course correction or when God calls you to make a change in life that provokes fear, a sense of inadequacy, or downright resistance. Moses’s story reminds us that in the midst of change, God is near. In fact, in the midst of Moses’s fear and flailing faith in the face of change, from shepherd to deliverer, twice God tells Moses, “I will be with you.”
Is there an area of your life that you need that same reminder? That whatever you are facing, God sees you?
When you face uncertainty, you can be tempted to default to fear rather than lean into faith. So let this be a reminder to you today that whatever your circumstances, whenever life throws you a curveball, God says, “I will be with you.”
(presented by Lisa Bishop)
Have you ever heard the saying, “Change happens when the pain of staying the same is greater than the pain of change.”
In other words, sometimes the pain of staying stuck in the same old place needs to be greater than the temporary suffering the change itself may induce.
Maybe you have been thinking of making a career change, taking better care of yourself physically and mentally, or giving up unhealthy or ungodly habits that no longer serve you or honor God. But up until now you have not been willing to lean into what will be required to change. Because let’s face it, change, even positive change, can cause a degree of suffering, and who likes suffering?
That’s something we try to avoid in life. Often with change comes suffering because it requires some type of sacrifice. We need to give something up to invite the new in. Such as giving up comfort, time, being right, being liked, a feeling of security. Change often demands reordering of priorities.
And often, in order to embrace change, we also need to be willing to embrace discomfort and a letting go.
When I think of life as a follower of Jesus it is a life where we are constantly growing and changing. Once we are “in Christ,” everything changes. Our ideas change. Our perspective changes. Our values and actions change to line up with God’s Word. As the Holy Spirit works within us we find, as 2 Corinthians 5:17 says, “the old has gone, the new is here!” And we are commanded to walk in the newness of life. The Christian life is an ongoing series of changes as we grow in knowledge, faith, and holiness. As we grow in Christ, growth requires change.
What change have you felt a nudge towards making in your life? Where do you sense God calling you to let go of the old to walk in the new? Remember that God will never contradict his Word so whatever change you are feeling led to, know that God will not ask you to do something that goes against holiness, righteousness, and the truth and instruction of the Bible.
Where is God calling you out of your comfort zone and into trusting him? What pain of change are you willing to endure to experience growth and transformation?
Take some time to get quiet with God. Seek his Holy Spirit for wisdom and courage, ask Jesus to help you as you say “yes” to the change he is calling you to.
(presented by Lisa Bishop)
Are you in a season of change? Are you embracing it or is this season inducing some anxiety or fear?
We all experience change. Sometimes we initiate it and other times we find ourselves in an unwelcome and unanticipated season of uncertainty.
Whether invited or unwelcomed…change can induce worry and anxiety. I don’t know about you, but I tend to be a bit of a control freak. Comfort and certainty can be idols for me, so when I am in the midst of change and I am uncertain about the future, I can often feel out of control, and I don’t like it! Instead of leaning into God I can tend to settle in to worry
When we worry we feel fear and concern because something unpleasant is happening and we don’t know when or how it will end.
Or we think that something bad could happen, and the “what if’s” kick in. Your mind gets into a negative spin cycle of worst-case scenarios and you try to be a predictor of the future. The thing about worry is that it is always fearing what could happen. We conjure up all of these scenarios in our minds, most of which never come true. In fact a recent study says that 91.4% of what we worry about never comes to fruition. When we worry, in some way we falsely believe that our worry can change our circumstances. We know that worry is a waste of emotional energy, yet we are all prone to it. The fact is worry cannot change outcomes.
So what do we do when change induces fear, worry, and anxiety to rear their ugly heads? We can look to the gospel of Matthew to refocus our thoughts and remember the words of Jesus.
“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear….Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?....Your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own” (Matthew 6:25, 27-28, 33-34).
What is an area of your life that you are lending too much mental and emotional energy to by worrying? What current or impending change is causing concern?
Bring your cares to Jesus and remember, worrying won’t add a moment to your life. When you experience concern for the future, turn it into prayer and praise that Jesus sees you and knows your needs. Discipline your mind and heart to look to Jesus where your help comes from. He is your ever-present help in times of change.
(presented by Lisa Bishop)
We all experience change. If we didn’t we would not be growing, life would be stagnant. When I think about change there are two categories that come to mind. Change that we initiate or change that we experience being thrust upon us that isn’t necessarily welcomed.
I know quite a few people who are in the midst of a career change. Some friends have lost their jobs, while others have decided to leave their current job for something new. Change can be exciting. It can also be scary. Change can feel liberating, it can also be anxiety producing, regardless of whether or not you initiated it.
In the course of life, one thing is true…change is inevitable. So, the question is, what do we do when change feels overwhelming?
One thing is to follow the old saying, “Take it one day at a time.” While it is important to have vision for the future, and an overall direction for where our next phase of life or career is headed, it can oftentimes feel overwhelming when we just focus on the big picture. We can feel flustered, frustrated, and even a little bit paralyzed.
As you experience life change, ask yourself, “What can I do today to move me towards my vision and goals? What action step can I take now that will propel me in the direction of what is next?”
For example, if you are in the midst of a job search and find yourself panicking about the future, what are the steps you can take today? Maybe it’s getting help writing your resume or applying for five jobs online. Perhaps it’s taking a course that will help you to be marketable or reaching out to friends to help you make connections in your field of interest. Maybe it’s going to a networking function. When the future feels overwhelming, daunting, and even impossible, approach it by taking on just a little at a time.
And if you are currently in a space of fear, anxiety and overwhelmed, remember to anchor yourself in Jesus. While your circumstances may be changing and uncertain, remind yourself of this truth from Hebrews 13:8: “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.” While the future may feel uncertain in the midst of change, Jesus never changes. He is faithful and trustworthy. He is a reliable companion in the midst of life altering change. Jesus is with you and will help you. The Holy Spirit will give you wisdom when you ask him.
So, do you think you could ever honestly say, “Thank God it’s Monday” and look forward to going to work? Maybe you’re thinking you could if only you had a better boss. If you work for someone who is difficult or demanding or unfair, going to work can seem pretty tough some days. Perhaps the thorn in your side at your job is a coworker or coworkers who are not so easy to get along with. It could be their work habits—or lack of—or their negative attitudes. Sometimes it’s their lifestyles, vulgarity, and foul mouths that make jobs unpleasant. You may have gone through downsizing and lost your job rather unfairly. That can make you pretty cynical. So, going to work just becomes a matter of putting in your time. “I owe, I owe, so it’s off to work I go!” and that’s about it.
In addition to difficult bosses and coworkers and unfair treatment, how about unpleasant work environments, heavy workloads, stress, pressure, lack of appreciation, lack of success, insufficient pay—to name a few! Most jobs have enough of these to make them pretty miserable. So, how could those dwarfs sing “Hi-ho, Hi-ho, it’s off to work we go!”? How could anybody honestly say, “Thank God It’s Monday!”?
Most people have the attitude that work is something we have to do whether we want to or not. Work is what we do in order to acquire all the things we want or need. Work is more often seen as a curse rather than a blessing.
That’s really sad because until sin entered the picture, work and work environments were ordained by God, blessed by God, and ordered by God. In short, we were created to work. And that’s where we get our dignity as humans.
Notice when you meet someone new how prone you are to ask, “What do you do?” Well, that’s because what we do is our identity to a great degree, and God so intended it. Our dignity does not come from what we have, because we don’t have anything. The Bible says, “The earth is the Lord’s and everything in it” (Psalm 24:1a). You may think you own some stuff but think again. As Paul told Timothy: “We brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it” (1 Timothy 6:7).
But God intended that our work would be a part of our identity, and that’s the way it was originally. But once sin entered the picture through the disobedience of Adam and Eve, everything good that God created was corrupted, including work. The Garden of Eden, the first workplace created by God, was corrupted by sin, and your workplace has been corrupted by sin. The reason we don’t often say “Thank God It’s Monday” is because of the curse that was placed on work after sin came on the scene.
You'll find that curse in Genesis 3 where God said to Adam: "Cursed is the ground because of you; through painful toil you will eat of it all the days of your life. It will produce thorns and thistles for you and you will eat the plants of the field. By the sweat of your brow you will eat your food until you return to the ground. . .” (Genesis 3:17b-19a). Paraphrase: You'll have to work, like you've been doing, but now work is going to be full of difficulties. You'll earn your living, but the thorns and thistles will make it unpleasant, and it will be painfully toilsome at times. Your work will be hard and make you weary and tired.
And this curse which God placed on work way back in the Garden of Eden is passed on to us today. Work is full of painful toil; you have to do things you don't like to do or want to do. You have to do work that is boring or unfulfilling. Your work may seem mundane or painfully toilsome.
Work is full of thorns and thistles; things that upset you, irritate you, and make the job unnecessarily difficult. The unpleasant coworker, the impossible boss, the demanding customer. They stick you and prick you and ruin otherwise good days.
Work is full of the sweat of your brow. You are physically exhausted at the end of the day. Mental exhaustion is just as difficult, and often we experience emotional exhaustion on ou...
What are the five greatest spiritual dangers we face? I’ve offered what I see as the answer to this question. First, there’s the danger of self-sufficiency, then self-deception, self-esteem, and self-confidence. And today we finish with number five,
Self-Satisfied
I’m sure you’ve noticed the common theme in all these dangers: self. We are our own greatest dangers in many different ways. And here’s one that is very subtle but very dangerous: being satisfied with yourself.
Are you satisfied with where you are in your walk with God? If so, you’re not likely to grow very much. We need a holy dissatisfaction with where we are so that we will seek and find all that God has for us.
The Psalmist wrote: “As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God” (Psalm 42:1-2a). Those are beautiful words that we quote and sing, but do we actually ever pant for God like a thirsty deer?
Now, this doesn’t mean that we live in a state of frustration or lack of peace. No, as A. W. Tozer writes: “O God, I have tasted Thy goodness, and it has both satisfied me and made me thirsty for more. . . I long to be filled with longing; I thirst to be made more thirsty still.”
If your walk with God is at a stalemate and you’ve been satisfied to just get by, I want to tell you you’re in great danger of missing so many good things, because, dear friends, the sweetest blessings, the greatest joys are found as we get to know God better and better and pursue him as our highest ambition and greatest achievement.
So, if you’re in that self-satisfied, mediocre, neither-hot-nor-cold stage, pray that God will stir up in you a hunger and thirst for righteousness so that you are not satisfied with where you are spiritually and you push on to discover all that God has for you and wants to do through you before your life is over.
I hope you’ll remember these five great dangers: Self-sufficiency, self-deception, self-esteem, self-confidence and self-satisfaction.
(Click here if you would like to download the devotional message for the entire week.)
Have you ever thought about the spiritual dangers you face? I’m listing what I see as our five greatest dangers. Number one was self-sufficiency, two was self-deception, and three was self-esteem. Number four is:
Self-Confidence
It seems to be a universally accepted belief that we all should have self-confidence. But Paul wrote to the Philippians that we who are believers, who glory in Christ Jesus, should put no confidence in the flesh. He went on to list all the reasons he could put confidence in himself: he was from the right family, had the best education, had demonstrated great zeal and abided by the laws flawlessly.
But he said, “I consider everything a loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them garbage, that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ—the righteousness that comes from God on the basis of faith” (Philippians 3:8-9).
Why is self-confidence a great spiritual danger? Because it erodes our faith and trust in Christ alone. Any time we start thinking that we can do something on our own or feeling as though we’ve achieved some position by our own efforts; any time we are confident about ourselves or our abilities, we are in a dangerous spot. That’s when we think we are standing firm, but instead we are most likely to fall.
I’ve noticed over the years that when a big event is coming up, a speaking engagement, a retreat, or whatever, usually the week before God has a way of reminding me that if I think I can do this on my own, I’d better think again. I’ll do something really stupid, or forget some detail, or get angry at someone and say something I shouldn’t—something like that. And I’ve decided it’s God’s way of whispering in my ear, “Don’t let your self-confidence become your Achilles heel; place no confidence in yourself. Remember, I use weak and foolish things of this world.”
Self-confidence is a great danger, but God-confidence is powerful. I’m confident he loves me and always will. I’m confident I can go to his throne with boldness at any time and he hears me. I’m confident that because of Jesus I have eternal life with God. And I’m confident I can do all that God wants me to do through Christ who gives me strength. That’s not self-confidence; that’s God-confidence.
Here’s a third danger that believers face in their walk with Christ.
Self-Esteem
That sounds very strange, doesn’t it? How could self-esteem be a danger? After all, everywhere we turn we hear that we have to have good self-esteem and feel good about ourselves in order to have a good life.
Well, there are two key problems with our search for self-esteem:
We’re looking for the wrong thing. We’re looking in the wrong place.
Self-esteem—feeling good about yourself—is a biblical oxymoron, a self-contradiction. The Bible tells us that our own natural selves are sin-infested and capable of nothing good. We learn that even the best things we can do look like filthy rags to God. So, feeling good about something that is inherently sinful and selfish is looking for the wrong thing.
For ten long years I searched for self-esteem and tried so hard to feel good about myself. I thought a successful career would do it, but I achieved that and found it empty. I thought the right relationship with a man would give me those good feelings, but relationships came and went, and none of them brought me the fulfillment I wanted. I bought homes and clothes and accumulated things and recognition, but the more I piled on what was supposed to bring me good self-esteem, the emptier I became.
If you’re looking for self-esteem today, you’re in the same danger I was in. It’s a dead-end road taking you nowhere but to emptiness and disappointment. Let me encourage you to abort that fruitless search and instead, set your heart to know God. Jeremiah wrote: “’Let not the wise boast of their wisdom or the strong boast of their strength or the rich boast of their riches, but let the one who boasts boast about this: that they have the understanding to know me, that I am the Lord, who exercises kindness, justice and righteousness on earth, for in these I delight,’ declares the Lord” (Jeremiah 9:23-24).
Set out to know and understand God. The more you do, the better you will feel about yourself. I promise you—it’s true. Good self-esteem comes as a by-product of knowing God better and better and appreciating who you are in God’s eyes.
What are the greatest spiritual dangers you face? I’m pointing out what I believe are our five greatest dangers. Here’s danger number two:
Self-Deception
My pastor once said that the problem with deception is we don’t know we’re being deceived. Now you may think that is self-evident, but most of us don’t really think about the fact that if we are deceived, we don’t know it. For if, indeed, we knew we were deceived, we would no longer be deceived. Knowledge of the truth drives out deception.
Many people are self-deceived because they want to be. They don’t want to face the music and see things as they really are, so they purposely remain in deception. For some, the refusal to know the truth is their way of trying to avoid the pain that could bring. For example, I may choose to be deceived about my inability to get along with people and tell myself that it’s not my fault, because I don’t want to face the fact that I have a problem. So, I deceive myself in order to avoid the pain of admitting I have a problem.
Of course, as long as I choose to be self-deceived, the problem gets worse not better. Only truth will set me free from such a problem, but I have to face that truth and then respond appropriately.
Others are self-deceived because they don’t know the truth that will prevent the deception. Paul wrote to the Ephesians, “Let no one deceive you with empty words.” How do you know when you’re hearing the truth or something deceptive? You measure it by the truth standard, the Word of God. That means you have to know the Bible well or you can be easily deceived by the empty and false words of all kinds of people.
Any time we live in deception, we are in great danger. I may be deceived into thinking there is water in an empty swimming pool, but upon diving in, neither the sincerity of my belief nor the innocence of my motives will prevent me from being killed by diving into an empty swimming pool. What dangers do you face today because you are deceived? Are you indulging in some self-deceptions? I encourage you to pray daily that God will reveal any deceptions in your life and show you the truth that will set you free from self-deceptions.
I want to tell you what I believe are the five greatest dangers you and I face in our walk as believers.
Self-Sufficiency
If you buy into the common belief that you are all you need, you are in great danger. Yet, that is considered a very worthy and admirable attitude by many people.
I well remember a conversation I had with a very successful businesswoman who had climbed the career ladder very fast and very high and earned lots of money and recognition. She said to me, “I don’t need anyone but myself. I don’t depend on anyone but myself. I have learned that you have to take care of number one and not rely on others.”
Even though she doesn’t recognize it, she is in great danger because the facts are, she is not self-sufficient, regardless of her track record or accomplishments. You see, we may be able to get by with our self-sufficient attitude for some time and we may fool ourselves into believing it is true. But there will always come a time when you face the reality that you are not sufficient.
Death certainly is one checkpoint that shows up the fallacy of self-sufficiency. The Bible says “Just as people are destined to die once, and after that to face judgment…” (Hebrews 9:27). This is one place for sure where we have to admit our inability to help ourselves, and instead place our trust totally in the Lord Jesus Christ. His death, burial and resurrection assure us that, through faith in him, we can face death knowing that beyond the grave is an eternity with God. But you can’t do that on your own. No one is self-sufficient when it comes to dying. We are dependent on God.
The Apostle Paul had to learn that he was not self-sufficient, even though he was well educated, had the right credentials and was totally devoted to serving Christ. He faced a disability that showed him how insufficient he was. But he learned the great truth that God’s grace was sufficient for him, for God’s power is made perfect in weakness. If you want God’s power to be made perfect in your life, admit your weakness, confess that you are not self-sufficient, and know the wonderful freedom of operating in God’s grace, which will be totally sufficient for you.
In 1 Peter 3:15 we read:
But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect.
In this one verse we find the answer to how to share our faith at work—or anywhere else, for that matter. First, it begins with revering Christ as Lord in our hearts. It means that Christ has a very special place in our heart—a unique status, above everyone and everything else. So, revering Christ implies that we should understand and obey the commands of our Lord. It means we are not the center of our world, but Christ is. And because you revere him as Lord, you live a moral and upright life, always striving to please him as the Lord of your life.
So, that’s where we begin as we think about sharing our faith at work. You have to know Jesus personally by placing your trust in him as your Savior, confessing your sins, and believing that he is the way, the truth, and the life and no one comes to God the Father except though Jesus. Have you done that? Are you certain that you have been born again, as Jesus said? Can you tell about a time when your life changed because you accepted Jesus and revered him as Lord? That’s the bottom-line issue.
Then you have to be prepared to give answers for the hope you have. Well, how can you give answers if you don’t get questions? So, what could cause an unbeliever to ask you a question that would give you an opening to share your faith? Here’s how.
First, you generate questions by your attitude toward your work, your company, your manager, and your coworkers. If we talked to some people who work with you, would they describe you as having a good attitude about your job? Or do you fall into complaint or critical mode too often? Do you join in with the office gossip, or have you learned to steer clear of that kind of conversation? If you want to generate questions that give you an opportunity to share your faith, you have to live in such a way that people notice the difference that Jesus makes in your life. That means you go to work each day with joy, with appreciation for your job, and with an upbeat, positive attitude toward your work.
Then, you generate questions by your work habits. You may not be the smartest person on the job or the most experienced or the most educated, but you can be the hardest-working person and the one who does her job with excellence consistently. That’s a choice you make. Would that describe you? And are you dependable—arriving at work on time, fulfilling promises or commitments you’ve made, making your deadlines? Do you avoid taking advantage of your company by making sure you give a good full day’s work each day?
Another way your life can generate questions is by living with total integrity on your job. Never fudging numbers, always telling the truth, taking nothing that doesn’t belong to you, abiding by company rules, honoring confidential information. You need to have a reputation of total trustworthiness and honesty.
And then, the way you deal with adversity can be a strong testimony to your faith. Whether it’s personal adversity, when you’re going through some personal crisis, or adversity on the job, the way you respond to it will speak volumes about you. When your coworkers watch you handle difficult situations in a peaceful way, without panic or fear, that will often generate a question. A good friend watched a coworker handle their very chaotic work environment and lots of constant pressure in a peaceful way, and she finally asked him how he could be so peaceful and calm where they worked. That opened a door for him to share his faith and after many conversations and a challenge to read the book of John, she accepted Christ as her Savior because of the way he handled an unpleasant and difficult work environment.
So, your work attitude and your work habits should be such that they stand out as different—and believe ...
I’ve been encouraging you to develop a gratitude muscle. I mentioned that the scientists are just now discovering that gratitude rewires your brain. But the idea of gratitude is not new; it’s not something that these scientists have just thought of. It’s been a biblical truth since time began.
But does it seem particularly difficult be thankful in our world today? We hear all kinds of bad news every day, and we have struggles of our own to deal with as well. It’s easy to say that we should be grateful, but how can we do this in our upside-down world?
Well, this is where we have an incredible advantage as followers of Jesus Christ. Actually trying to develop a gratitude muscle won’t work unless you have something to be thankful for—something that is not affected by the circumstances of this world or of our lives. Gratitude works when it is true response of a creature to a Creator.
I have a final suggestion to help us develop this gratitude muscle. How about a gratitude journal—a place where you consistently keep a record of all you have to be thankful for. Even if you journal already, use a separate gratitude journal and on a regular, if not daily basis, write down at least one thing you are grateful for. There is great benefit in putting it in writing.
Developing this gratitude muscle will be one of the most game-changing things you can do for yourself and for the glory of God. But you will have to work at it. You will need to consistently exercise this gratitude muscle, which means you’ll need daily reminders to be a thankful, grateful person. It will re-wire your brain; it will change your attitude; it will improve your health; it will improve your relationships—everything in your life will be so much better if you will make a commitment to develop and improve your gratitude muscle. I encourage you to start developing your gratitude muscle.
(Click here if you would like to download a pdf of the entire message for this week.)
Creating a gratitude muscle is an area that all of us can grow in, and it will bless you as you develop that gratitude muscle more and more. The secular world has discovered that grateful people experience more joy in life and are more fun to be around. But here’s the thing: becoming grateful is not easy because it isn’t natural. We must cultivate this gratitude muscle.
You know, just saying the words “thank you” does not make you a grateful person. It may just be a polite phrase you’ve learned to say, and you can say it automatically without much thought. In fact, the world’s definition of thankfulness is feeling pleased or being conscious of a benefit you’ve received. In other words, it could be all about you.
In order to develop a Christ-honoring gratitude muscle, you must express your gratitude to God for who he is, and then when you’re truly focused on how blessed you are to know God, that thankfulness should overflow from you to everyone around you. Then you’ll be blessing others as you have been blessed.
So, biblical gratitude is acknowledging the giver even more than the gift. Gratitude is developed and strengthened through praise, through knowing God better and better, through many different ways. We read in Colossians 3:16:
Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts.
Let—or allow—the message of Christ dwell among you richly. That takes effort; that takes planning; that takes time. This is what strengthens our gratitude muscle; we do it through fellowship with others, we encourage each other, we sing praise—and all of it done with gratitude in our hearts. Is that how you worship God—always mindful of how blessed you are because of Jesus?
Here's my challenge to help you increase your gratitude muscle: Find a fellow believer and thank God together, or sing a song together, or in some way encourage each other to be thankful. Do it on the phone, on zoom, on Facebook – whatever is available, but give thanks to God today with at least one other person.
It has been proven scientifically that gratitude produces very positive effects, creating a culture of gratitude which can encourage others to also be thankful. So let’s develop a gratitude muscle—putting practices in place in your life that cause you to focus on all you have to be thankful for.
The Bible long ago established our need for gratitude. Do you remember that in the Old Testament the people of Israel gave thank offerings? Interestingly, the thank offering was a free will offering (Leviticus 22:19), meaning that even under the law, God did not require his people to be thankful. He always longed that thank offerings would be the spontaneous response of the hearts of his people to his goodness.
Do you remember the story in the Bible when Jesus healed ten lepers? Leprosy was a horrible disease in that day, and to be cured of it was almost unheard of. So, when Jesus healed these ten lepers, you would think they would be extremely thankful. But how many of those ten lepers returned to thank Jesus? Here’s what Luke tells us:
One of them, when he saw he was healed, came back, praising God in a loud voice. He threw himself at Jesus’ feet and thanked him—and he was a Samaritan. Jesus asked, “Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine? Has no one returned to give praise to God except this foreigner?” (Luke 17:15-18)
How could the other nine never even bother thanking Jesus for their freedom from leprosy? But then I ask myself, how many times have I taken the blessings of Jesus for granted and failed to give him thanks and praise for what he has done?
Here’s my challenge: Think of one time when the Lord has done something wonderful for you, and even though you may have thanked him before, this time write your thanksgiving on paper. Put it in your journal, type it from your laptop—whatever works for you. But the important thing is to take time and put your words of gratitude in writing to God. Remember, gratitude rewires your brain, but more importantly, it develops your gratitude muscle.
Someone has said that gratitude is for mental health what vegetables are for physical health. Now, hopefully you enjoy eating vegetables because you know that they are absolutely necessary if you want to have good health. Sometimes you may eat vegetables just because you know they are good for you, even if that particular veggie is not your favorite—right?
Well, the same is true for your mental health, if you want to create a gratitude muscle. You learn to be thankful for everything and at all times because it’s good for you. You may not feel thankful, but you can still intentionally think about and talk about all you have to be thankful for.
It’s interesting that thankfulness and its variations show up in the New Testament 71 times and it is always a directive of Scripture. For example:
“Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus” (1Thessalonians 5:18). “Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful” (Colossians 3:15). “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God” (Philippians 4:6).
It’s not a suggestion; it is a spiritual exercise. Something you do intentionally.
In the Old Testament there are about 102 times that thankfulness and its variations occur, and you are no doubt aware that the Psalms are full of thanksgiving. Just one example:
Psalm 9:1-2: I will give thanks to you, Lord, with all my heart; I will tell of all your wonderful deeds. I will be glad and rejoice in you; I will sing the praises of your name, O Most High.
So, here is one suggestion you can practice today in order to develop your gratitude muscle. Avoid complaining about anything today—nothing! Instead, verbalize thankfulness today out loud. Look around you—what do you see that you are thankful for? A beautiful day? Your child? A friend? Good food? Just look around you and verbalize your thankfulness for what you see. Maybe even count the number of times you say, “Thank you for. . .” whatever you see. That should keep you busy all day, and you will be strengthening your gratitude muscle.
It always amuses me to see how science often catches up with the Bible. Recently I read an article entitled “Gratitude Rewires Your Brain.” When I saw the title, I thought, Well, yeah—that’s been a Bible truth for ages.
In 2014 a physicist wrote, “We are now entering the golden age of neuroscience. We have learned more about the thinking brain in the last ten to fifteen years than in all of previous human history.” So, in studying the brain, these scientists are discovering how God created us, and how living in harmony with his principles improves all parts of our lives, including our brains—how we think!
This article goes on to say that being grateful is far more significant to our mental health and well-being than we may realize. Studies have shown that performing simple gratitude leads to better sleep, improved interpersonal relationships, less stress and even reduced physical pain. The article concludes that “the more practice you give your brain at feeling and expressing gratitude, the more it adapts to this mind-set…a sort of gratitude ‘muscle’ that can be exercised and strengthened.”
I love this thought of creating a gratitude muscle. I’ve often talked about building your spiritual muscles, and you do that through God’s Word, prayer, fellowship with other believers, etc. So, I think it would be very helpful for all of us to be intentional about creating a gratitude muscle.
If you want to rewire your brain with gratitude and create a gratitude muscle, there are some specific and easy things you can do to make this happen. Let’s begin with the Scripture that tells us to build this gratitude muscle:
Colossians 2:6-7: So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live your lives in him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness.
Your faith will be strengthened as you grow that gratitude muscle!
Several years ago I wrote a book entitled Why Do I Always Feel Guilty? The reason I wrote that book was because I knew from my own experience and from ministering to women for years that we take on guilt at the drop of a hat! It doesn’t take much at all to make us feel guilty.
God wants to change our names from Bitter to Joyful, from Anxious to Peaceful, from Discouraged to Delivered, from Addicted to Unshackled, and guilty is another name God wants to change.
Is your name Guilty?
God wants to give you a wonderful new name: Forgiven. David said that his guilt had overwhelmed him like a burden too heavy to bear. But then he acknowledged his sin and God forgave the guilt of his sin. God wants to do that for you.
Colossians 1:13-14: For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.
Psalm 32:1: Blessed is the one whose transgressions are forgiven, whose sins are covered.
And God also wants to take away that false guilt you’ve been carrying around. It could be that you are allowing yourself to feel guilty about things that either have already been forgiven and forgotten by God, or things for which you are not truly guilty.
For example, if you’ve confessed your past sins, you are forgiven and you don’t need to carry guilt with you any longer. And if you’re feeling guilty for things totally beyond your control, that’s false guilt that the enemy has dumped on you. God wants you to change your name to Forgiven, and live in the joy that he remembers your sin against you no more.
God knows that old name you’ve got. He knows you and he knows your name. But here’s the best news in all the world: The God who created the heavens and the earth, the only true God, loves you with a love that cannot be quenched or changed. He knows the worst about you and he loves you still. He wants you to know abundant life that is found only in Jesus Christ.
Would you like to claim your new name today? You can do that; whatever it is that has you in bondage, you can leave it behind and move into the life you were meant to live.
(Click here to get a copy of "Your New Name" cards.)
(Click here if you would like to download a copy of the devotional for this week.)
Did you ever think that maybe God wants to change your name? God can change our names. He did it for Abraham and Sarah and Paul, to mention a few, and their name change indicated that God was doing a new work in their lives and giving them new purpose. Honestly, I think some of us need a name change. For example,
Is your name Addicted?
Usually we think of addictions as limited to alcohol or drugs, but addictions come in many other less-visible ways, too. For example, there are food addictions, television addictions, sexual addictions, shopping addictions, to name a few. And I think there are others that are even more subtle, like being addicted to laziness or to negativity or to self-pity. It’s possible to be addicted to a person who is not good for you, when you feel like you can’t live without them even though they’re doing you harm.
The enemy of your soul is such a thief and liar that he can get you hooked on something that seems innocent, and perhaps in moderation it is harmless, but your addiction to it keeps you in bondage and prevents you from knowing the full potential that God has for your life.
If there is some area of addiction in your life, no matter how small or hidden, God wants to change your name from Addicted to Unshackled. In Luke 4:18 Jesus said:
“The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to set the oppressed free….”
And Paul wrote to the Galatians:
It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery (Galatians 5:1).
Living with addictions is letting yourself be burdened again by enslavement to that thing or that person. Would you like to be set free from that addiction in your life? Ask God today to change your name to Unshackled. You may not be able to break that bondage, but Jesus came to set you free and he can break it.
(Click here to get a copy of "Your New Name" cards.)
Sometimes we need a new name. God changed the names of some significant people in the Bible: Abram and Saul and Jacob and Simon, to name a few. He changed their names because he was setting them in a new direction, changing more than their names. He was changing their attitudes, their priorities, their characters. And you know, I think God probably wants to change our names sometimes, too.
We’ve talked about changing your name from Bitter to Joyful, from Anxious to Peaceful, from Discouraged to Delivered. Here’s another name that needs to be changed:
Is your name Rejected?
Have people hurt you and disappointed you? So many have experienced significant rejection from parents, from siblings, from mates, from children, from friends, from employers. Sometimes those rejections are blatant, sometimes subtle, but in every case they are painful.
If you’ve been living with the name of Rejected lately—or maybe for many years—God really wants you to know that you are Accepted. Your new name is Accepted. When we become new creations in Christ, we are accepted in Christ Jesus, the Beloved, and nothing can ever separate us from Jesus and his love for us.
I think of a woman who experienced subtle rejection from her mother all her life, as her mother almost daily told her that she was an unplanned and unwanted child. She reminded her over and over again that her birth had greatly complicated her mother’s life and made her unhappy. It was the kind of rejection that wasn’t obvious to others, but it was there all the time. But when she came to know the love of Jesus and realized that she was truly accepted in him, it was life-changing for her. She lived her remaining years basking in the glow that Jesus loved and accepted her, and she’s with him now, no doubt still basking in that love
Psalm 66:20: Praise be to God, who has not rejected my prayer or withheld his love from me!
1 Peter 2:4-5: As you come to him, the living Stone—rejected by humans but chosen by God and precious to him—you also, like living stones, are being built into a spiritual house to be a holy priesthood, offering spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ.
If you’ve been living with the name Rejected, God wants to call you Accepted, starting now!
(Click here to get a copy of "Your New Name" cards.)
Have you ever wanted to change your name? Some people actually do change their names because they just don’t like the name they were given. Well, God changed some people’s names in the Bible, but he did it to signify a change he was making in their lives. Does God want to change your name?
Is your name Anxious?
Are you carrying burdens way too heavy for you? Are you living in fear and worry? You know, Jesus said we are not to carry heavy burdens; we aren’t built for heavy burdens. He carries the heavy burdens, as we exchange our heavy ones for his light burden. If your name has been Anxious lately, it’s time for a name change.
1 Peter 5:7: Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
Philippians 4:6-7: Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
God wants to give you a new name—Peaceful. He wants you to be confident of the fact that he will never leave you or forsake you, and that you can cast all your care on him, because he cares for you. He wants you to know that peace that passes understanding which is found only in Jesus.
Is your name Discouraged?
Are you ready to give up, verging on depression? Has life been full of all kinds of disappointments and discouragements lately? Sometimes it seems like they gang up on you, doesn’t it? Well, if your name has been Discouraged, God wants to change it to Delivered.
Deuteronomy 31:8: The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.
Psalm 32:7: You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance.
Psalm 34:4: I sought the Lord, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears.
God wants to change your name from Bitter to Joyful, and also from Anxious to Peaceful, and from Discouraged to Delivered. Will you let him change your name?
(Click here to get a copy of "Your New Name" cards.)
Have you considered that you might need a new name? There were several times in the Bible where God changed someone’s name. The most familiar name changes are:
Abram became Abraham Sarai became Sarah Jacob became Israel Simon became Peter Saul became Paul
God had a purpose for changing their names. It wasn’t that he just didn’t like the name they chose; names held a great deal of significance in that culture, and God changed their names because God was changing them. God was giving them new purpose and meaning in life. God was bringing them from one place in life to the place he wanted them to be. God was changing their name to signify that they had been on the wrong road, and now they were going to be on the narrow road—God’s road—that leads to life.
I wonder if God wants to change your name. For example:
Is your name Bitter?
If so, I can assure you that God wants to change it. In Hebrews 12:15 we read:
See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many.
Bitter roots grow in our hearts when we’ve been wronged, when our dreams are not coming true, when we’ve suffered some kind of loss, when our circumstances are difficult—it doesn’t take much for bitterness to take root in your heart. And as this verse from Hebrews tells us, when left unchecked, bitterness always grows. You cannot hold onto one little bitter twig, because it won't stay little. It always grows.
And then, anytime you allow any little bitterness to take root in your heart, count on it causing you a great deal of trouble, as sure as night follows day. It will cause physical troubles—actually make you sick. It will make you ugly—truly make you look sour and unattractive. Bitterness causes emotional and mental trouble, too. It starts to take over your mind and your thoughts, and you can easily become obsessed and out of touch with reality because of bitterness.
Funny thing is, when we're bitter, it affects all of our relationships, not just the one we are bitter against. As parents we can transfer that bitter spirit to our children; as managers and employees we can transfer it to our co-workers. It is a poison that affects everyone it touches.
Have you stored up so much hurt and anger that it has turned into bitterness? When your name is bitter, you miss the grace of God. God wants to give you a new name. He wants you to be called Joyful, filled with the joy of your salvation and free from the pain of bitterness.
(Click here to get a copy of "Your New Name" cards.)
I believe this topic of praising God is vital to our spiritual, mental and emotional health. It offers the answers for many of the problems each of us faces. I feel as though I'm just beginning to learn how to be more intentional about praising God and how important that praise is in my life. But I sure want to be a fast-learner, don't you?
God has asked us to praise him, not because he needs our praise, but because we need the benefits that come from praising him. Praise helps us mature spiritually, and brings healing to us emotionally, mentally and physically. Praise can really change those things about us that we know need changing—those harmful personality traits that we can't seem to get rid of. All of those are very good reasons to learn to praise God more and more.
Another extremely important reason to praise God is that it defeats our enemy, Satan. It is a weapon to be used in spiritual conflict. Now, perhaps I should remind us all that we are in a spiritual battle. We have an enemy who wants to devour us, to defeat us, to rob and steal from us, to destroy us any way he can. And he has a host of helpers. This enemy is real, and we are in a daily battle with him. If you don't recognize his existence and know how to defeat him, you will be continually at his mercy, and wondering why your life never seem to be victorious as it should be.
Well, praise is one weapon to use against this enemy and it is a very effective weapon. 2 Chronicles 20 is a beautiful example of how praise can be used to defeat our enemy. Just to give a brief background, war had been declared on the people of God by their enemies. Jehoshaphat, the king of Judah, called the nation to repentance, fasting and prayer. And as they repented and prayed, God assured them of victory, though they were outnumbered by their enemies. Listen to what they did to win this victory: Early in the morning they left for the Desert of Tekoa. As they set out, Jehoshaphat stood and said, “Listen to me, Judah and people of Jerusalem! Have faith in the Lord your God and you will be upheld; have faith in his prophets and you will be successful.” After consulting the people, Jehoshaphat appointed men to sing to the Lord and to praise him for the splendor of his holiness as they went out at the head of the army, saying: ‘Give thanks to the Lord, for his love endures forever.’ As they began to sing and praise, the Lord set ambushes against the men of Ammon and Moab and Mount Seir who were invading Judah, and they were defeated. The Ammonites and Moabites rose up against the men from Mount Seir to destroy and annihilate them. After they finished slaughtering the men from Seir, they helped to destroy one another” (2 Chronicles 2:20-23). Here we see that the people of God were victorious even though their enemy was much greater and stronger than they were. And praise was the tool they used to appropriate the victory that God had promised them.
Now when did the victory come? After they began singing and praising. I sure hope you're paying close attention, because this is a very important concept that will make a difference in your life. My friends, in spiritual warfare we must learn to praise God even before we see the victory. You know, believing that God can answer prayer is not enough. But believing that he has heard and has answered—even before you see his answer—that's faith. We show that kind of faith when we praise him in advance.
And when we praise, our enemy is defeated. Why? In Psalm 22:3 we are told that God inhabits the praise of his people. This means that where there is praise and adoration of him, there he identifies and openly manifests his presence. He takes up residence in the praise of his people. And his presence always makes Satan run the other way. Satan cannot abide the presence of the living God. So, praise him. He will inhabit your praise and your enemy will flee. Satan is allergic to praise.
Well,
Loyalty is one of the most valuable of all characteristics. And it is a cornerstone in building good relationships.
Did you ever have a friend or relative who was disloyal to you? If you find out that someone who you counted as a friend has said or done something disloyal, it really hurts your relationship, doesn't it? There's no question that in order to build good relationships, we need this ingredient of loyalty.
Do you stand up for your friends no matter what? Proverbs 18:24 says there is "a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” Again, in Proverbs 17:9 we see that "He who covers over an offense promotes love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends."
Make certain that you don't damage your relationships by lack of loyalty. Your friends and family members should know beyond a shadow of a doubt that you will be loyal to them; you will stick closer than a brother. If you hear someone talking disparagingly about a friend, don't be afraid to show your loyalty. Stick up for them. Good friends should do that.
Remember, love will cover over an offense. That doesn't mean you whitewash sin, but you do everything you can to keep down the rumors, to keep from exposing your friend to others' criticism. Gossip is one of the chief causes of broken relationships. If we gossip about others, we damage the relationship we have with that person and we also damage the relationships they have with others.
Someone has said, "Relationships are the sandpaper of our lives.” Well, it's true that they are not always easy, but it's also true that if we practice biblical principles in our relationships, we'll discover immense improvement. I guarantee you that as you, by God's grace, set out to be the best friend you can be, you'll discover that what you sow, you reap; and that effort will produce great joy and peace in your relationships.
(Click here to download the devotional for the entire week.)
How do you feel about someone who makes a promise to you and doesn't keep it? It doesn't generate lots of good feelings toward that person on your part, does it?
Proverbs 13:12 says that "Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.” And in Ecclesiastes 5:5 we read "It is better not to vow than to make a vow and not fulfill it.”
Many relationships suffer greatly because of broken promises and commitments. If you've made someone a promise, that builds hope in that person. He or she is hopeful that you will do what you've said you'd do. Now, if you fail to keep that promise without a good reason or explanation, then it does something to that person's heart—to their feelings toward you. They're disappointed, of course, but more than that, they feel betrayed because you didn't remember or care enough to keep your promise. It's a form of rejection when you think about it. Obviously, that doesn't have to happen very often in a relationship before it takes a terrible toll.
Solomon, the wisest man who ever lived, tells us it's much better not to promise anything at all than to make a promise and not keep it. Christians should be dependable people, always diligent in following through. And remember that Jesus said if we're not faithful in the small things, we won't be faithful in the large things either. So, we need to make sure that we are faithful and dependable from the smallest to the largest things in our lives. Can your friends and family members depend on you? Do you keep your promises?
If you find that you have a tendency to make commitments—even small ones—and not fulfill them, this could be one major reason for some of your relationship problems. Ask God to help you to be more careful in making those promises, and then to take them very seriously when you do. Believe me, it will make a noticeable difference in your relationships.
Not long ago someone said to me, "You know the problem with him is he just doesn't listen.” That's a common problem lots of us have, isn't it? One of the best things we can do to improve our relationships is simply to truly listen better.
James 1:19 tell us that we should be quick to listen and slow to speak. What great advice that is. Let me ask you, are you a good listener? You know, listening takes effort. You have to work at it.
One of my bad habits is that my mind wanders while people are talking to me. I find myself thinking about all kinds of other things instead of listening. Do you have that problem, too? Well, one way to help you concentrate is to take notes while you're listening. You should also pray and ask God to help you remember to listen and not let your mind wander.
Also, there's a big difference in listening and waiting for your turn to talk. Sometimes out of politeness we don't interrupt people while they're talking to us, but we're not really listening because we're thinking of what we're going to say as soon as we get our chance.
You know, if you'll listen better, you won't jump to wrong conclusions so often, you won't say something you regret, you'll learn a lot more about those friends and truly get to know them if you'll just make yourself listen to them when they're talking to you. And while you're listening, put yourselves in their shoes and try to understand them better.
James says we should be quick to listen. If a friend or family member indicates a need to talk to you, are you quick to listen? Do you readily put aside whatever else you're doing, quickly, so you can listen to them? The Bible really gets down where we live, doesn't it?
And then, we're told to be slow to speak. Go easy with the words. If you talk a lot you're bound to say something you shouldn't. It's a fact that women say many more words in a given day than men do. And let's face it, we often say too much. We have a great need to communicate, but that has to be tempered with the Holy Spirit's control of our words.
Becoming quick to listen and slow to speak is absolutely guaranteed to improve your relationships. Give it a try.
The Bible has wonderful advice for us about relationships which, if applied, will make dramatic differences in our relationships with our friends, family members, coworkers—everyone.
Proverbs 17:17 is one of the classic verses to help us improve our relationships. It says quite simply: "A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.”
At all times—we can apply that very literally. A true friend is available in the middle of the night, weekends, lunch hours, times reserved for yourself, times when you're tired, times when you feel very needy yourself. Friendship requires a time commitment of us that may be costly and sacrificial on occasion.
Many friendships are simply reciprocal: the people involved give to the relationship for the purpose of receiving, and when they're not receiving what they think they should be, they stop giving. But that's not the kind of relationship that loves at all times. Jesus said anybody can love the person who loves them in return; but true love is to care for someone when they are not showing you the same care and concern. Sometimes even our closest relationships go through periods where it seems the other person is not giving to us the way he or she should. But by God's grace we can be the kind of friend who just keeps loving.
Certainly during times of adversity, we should be there for our friends and family. Is someone you know going through some deep waters right now? How much have you been there for that person? You don't have to have answers; you don't need great words of wisdom. Just be there. Let her know you care in every way possible.
If you truly want to improve your relationships, ask God to help you be the kind of friend who loves at all times. That's the way Jesus is with us, and through him, we can be the same way with others.
How are you doing in your relationships? Are they in good shape? The Bible gives us much good advice and guidance to help us with our relationships.
Romans 12:15 offers some very sound counsel for us. It says: Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Think about your relationships with your family, your friends, your coworkers, even your more casual acquaintances. Do you really rejoice with them when they rejoice and cry with them when they cry?
Have you ever been excited about telling a friend some good news, only to discover that they didn't seem to find it exciting at all? I remember once my company advised me that I was to go to a special conference. I was thrilled at this good news, and immediately shared it with my friend, expecting her to be happy with me. Instead, my good news put her into a terrible bad mood; she didn't speak to me for a quite awhile. You see, she wanted to go to the conference, too, so instead of rejoicing with me, she was angry at me.
I remember when a close friend was sharing a disappointment with a couple of us. We both just moaned and offered sympathy. "I'm so sorry; that's really rotten. You've sure had nothing but bad news lately it seems.” Do you know how she responded? She said, "Yes, but I know the Lord has a purpose in all this and we'll be okay.”
When a fellow believer has a grief or disappointment of some kind, don't give them cliches or advice. Don't even quote Romans 8:28 to them. Just mourn with them. That's what they need right then. And when you mourn with them, they can then quote Romans 8:28; they will be the one to tell you that they know God is still in control. However, if you say things like: "Now, don't let this get you down. You know that God still loves you and will take care of you," it somehow makes them want to say, "But it hurts. Don't you understand? It hurts.”
A good way to improve your relationships is to just learn to rejoice at other's good news with them. Enhance their happiness by sharing their excitement. And when they're in the depths of despair, just cry with them, give them sympathy and love, without any advice. That's good biblical counsel.
You surely don't have to read much in the Bible to realize that praise is a theme which runs throughout Scripture. There's no question that it is intended to be a part of every Christian's life. Here are a few verses which exhort us to praise God.
Psalm 150:1: Praise the Lord! Praise God in his sanctuary.
Psalm 22:23: You who fear the Lord, praise him. All you descendants of Jacob, honor him.
Psalm 33:1: Sing joyfully to the Lord, you righteous; it is fitting for the upright to praise him.
Praise is the occupation of heaven. This is what is going on now in heaven, and it's what we'll be doing when we get to heaven. Listen to these descriptions in Revelation of what heaven is like:
“Each of the four living creatures had six wings and was covered with eyes all around, even under its wings. Day and night they never stop saying: “‘Holy, holy, holy is the Lord God Almighty,’ who was, and is, and is to come” (Revelation 4:8).
“Then I looked and heard the voice of many angels, numbering thousands upon thousands, and ten thousand times ten thousand. They encircled the throne and the living creatures and the elders. In a loud voice they were saying: “Worthy is the Lamb, who was slain, to receive power and wealth and wisdom and strength and honor and glory and praise!” (Revelation 5:11-12).
“Then I heard what sounded like a great multitude, like the roar of rushing waters and like loud peals of thunder, shouting: “Hallelujah! For our Lord God Almighty reigns” (Revelation 19:6).
And because God knows that praising him is so important to us, he repeatedly exhorts us to praise him. Let me point out some things that will happen when you make praise a way of life:
Praise helps you mature spiritually. It is the highest function of the human spirit. You are transformed by praise. It strengthens your inner person. Praise is the spark plug of faith. It is the one thing needed to get our faith off the ground. When you start to praise God more and more, you'll have more faith and trust in the Lord. Praise brings healing. There is much mental and emotional instability that can be greatly improved through praising God. Praise makes you a positive person.
So, there's no question that our lives should be filled with praise; it is a direction we see throughout Scripture. But the question is why does God wants us to praise him? We know that God is almighty and self-sufficient. Therefore, why would he want us to praise him? Could he possibly have a need for our praise?
When we think of praising someone, we think of doing it for their good—right? We humans have a great need for recognition and reward. I have done a lot of management training in my career, and one of the basic principles of management which I emphasized was that in order to properly motivate people, you've got to recognize and reward them for the good things they do. I used the phrase: "Catch them doing something good and tell them.” That management technique will do more for increasing productivity and improving morale than most anything else a manager can do.
Why? Because we humans really need some positive feedback and reinforcement in order for us to feel good about ourselves, to have any confidence in ourselves, and to be motivated to do things right. We need pats on the back, warm fuzzies, and “attaboys.”
But does God? Could he need anything which man or any other of his creatures could supply? He who spoke the worlds into existence—why should the puny praise of people make any difference to him? Does he need positive reinforcement in order to be motivated to continue to bless us and love us?
The question is ridiculous. I want you to know that God does not need our praise. He doesn't need to be told how wonderful he is. He is not ego centered as we are, and whether or not we praise him, he is God and he is complete and he does not need to be reminded nor does he need our affirmation. God has no need of anything or anyone.
Did you ever work with someone or maybe live with someone who complained all the time and you just wanted to tell that person, “Get over it!” A complaining spirit is high on the list of things to get over.
You can slip into complaining mode so easily and you don’t even realize it. Before you know it, you’re complaining about the weather, complaining about your job, about your boss, complaining about how much work you have to do—etc., etc., etc.
Here’s my challenge to you: For one day make a commitment that you will get through that entire day without complaining about anything. Not one negative, complaining word will come out of your mouth. Pray about it early in the morning. Pray Ephesians 4:29, like this, “Lord, today I pray that no unwholesome talk will come out of my mouth, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that I may benefit those who listen.”
Then notice how many times during the day you start to complain—it will probably surprise you to discover that it happens more frequently than you thought it would. I have done this myself, and I was shocked to see how often I said things like, “I don’t feel good,” or “I’ll never get this all done,” or “I wish I didn’t have to do this.” Way too much of what I thought and said was complaining. But once the Holy Spirit began to make me sensitive to my complaining tendency, then through his power I began to change.
I still have to watch it, believe me, but Paul wrote to the Philippians that we are to rejoice in the Lord always, and we are to be thankful in all circumstances. Rejoicing and being thankful will keep you from complaining.
So, if you tend to complain a lot—or even a little—“Get over it!” Put it behind you. Move on to the good things God has done for you. It will transform you, and those who have to work or live with you will notice the difference.
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I want to urge you to get over the tendency to compare yourself with others! We need to stop this comparison habit.
God has created each of us with unique personalities, gifts and abilities. No two of us is alike, and God never compares us, one against the other. We learn this principle in the parable of the talents, as found in Matthew 25. In this story Jesus makes it clear that the three men were given three different resources—one received five talents, one two talents, and another received only one talent. And when the master evaluated what they did with their resources, the first two received the same reward, even though one ended up with ten talents and one with only four. But they both were very good stewards of what had been given to them.
The man with only one talent did nothing with his, and the master strongly rebuked him for this. I’m sure this guy looked at the other two and figured he couldn’t do much with only one talent; if he had two or five, it would be different, but with just one to work with, he simply gave up. And his condemnation from the master, as Jesus tells the story, was very strong.
The message Jesus was sending is that he never compares us with other people; rather he looks at where we started and where we ended—what we did with what we were given. And if you and I are good stewards of what we have, we will receive his commendation.
Yet, we are so prone to compare ourselves to others, and that leads us either to be proud that we have more or can do more than others, or more often, it leads us to feel sorry for ourselves, get down on ourselves, or just shift the blame and give up!
I really want to strongly encourage you to get over it! Stop comparing yourselves to others. Instead, appreciate how God has created you, make sure you multiply the gifts he has given you, do the very best you can with what you have, and know that God will never compare you with other people. That’s a human tendency, but it isn’t the way God works!
Have you had any pity parties lately? If so, I’m advising you to “get over it.” Pity parties need to be abandoned forever.
Think of how the enemy uses self-pity in our lives.
Almost always, pity parties cause us to waste time. Not only do pity parties waste our time, they also waste our energy. Have you noticed this? When you throw a pity party, your imagination runs wild. You start thinking about what someone has done or what has happened, and in your mind it becomes a lot worse than it really is. That, of course, causes you to over-react to it. Then what often happens is that relationships are damaged. When we're feeling sorry for ourselves, we often say and do things that hurt others, things we regret later on. But once those things are said and done, it may be too late to undo the damage. Self-pity can cause irreparable damage to relationships. Another inevitable result of self-pity is that it affects our performance. We slow down, we lose motivation, we do our work halfheartedly—or, what often happens is we quit! In our jobs we may not have the luxury of quitting, so instead our work habits deteriorate.
These are just some of the common results of pity parties. Do you see why I say that we should get over pity parties? But how do we do that?
Change your attitude about pity parties.
Ask God to give you holy anger about pity parties, to see them as he sees them, and to get sick and tired of feeling sorry for yourself.
Think about Jesus and all that he endured.
Hebrews 12:2 says "Let us fix our eyes on Jesus...” By a set of your will, stop thinking about poor me, and think about Jesus - fix the eyes of your heart on him.
Get busy doing something constructive.
Don't just sit there; do something! This is one time you need to get involved in constructive activity that will take your mind off of your hurt feelings and shut down that pity party.
“Get over it!” If someone barked that to you, you might take offense at it. But there truly are things we need to “get over,” things that waste our time and energy.
We need to get over our tendency to get our feelings hurt easily, and in addition, we need to get over past hurts.
In Philippians 3 Paul writes, "But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus" (Philippians 3:13b-14).
Paul is focused on one thing: winning the prize, doing what God has called him to do. When you don’t do that, the future is on hold for you because you are obsessed with the past.
Paul could put his past behind him because he had a goal in front of him. You know, when you're occupied with doing something worthwhile, when you have activities that are meaningful and important, you can put the past behind you much more easily. I notice that people who are inactive are much more likely to be consumed with their past. One of the great blessings of being involved in the lives of others is that it causes you to forget yourself.
Another reason Paul could put his past behind him was that he knew he was forgiven and that God remembered his past sins no more. Surely he must have struggled with the fact that he had persecuted and killed Christians in his past, but on that Damascus road he found Jesus and from that point on he was a forgiven man, and he had accepted that forgiveness.
Maybe that is what is keeping you enslaved to your past—you really don't feel like God has forgiven you. Well, if you sincerely asked him to in the name of Jesus and through his shed blood, then he had to forgive you or he would be a liar—and God is not a liar. So, maybe you just don't feel forgiven. That's where you must ignore those feelings and live by faith.
When the enemy comes to haunt you with those past sins, quote 1 John 1:9 over and over—out loud if possible: "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness."
In today’s jargon it’s not unusual to hear someone say, “Just get over it!” While that can sound abrupt or uncaring, there is in that hackneyed phrase some good advice. I’m going to focus on what you and I need to “get over,” what we need to put behind us, what we need to abandon in order to be effective for Jesus, as well as peaceful and happy.
And the first thing we need to “get over” is hurt feelings. So much harm comes from hurt feelings, so much unnecessary pain. So, if your feelings are hurt easily, I would kindly say to you, “Get over it.”
But how? Here are some suggestions.
Break old habits. When your feelings are hurt, think, “Is this really about me, or could there be some other reason that this person behaved in this way?” Break that habit of taking everything personally and imagining that someone is intentionally offending you, when in reality they may be simply focused on their own problems and not thinking about you at all.
Philippians 4:8 says we are to think about things that are of a good report, not a bad report. Yet we are all prone to jump to negative conclusions when someone behaves in a less-than-friendly way. Ask God to help you break those old habits.
Buy time. Don’t respond to your hurt feelings quickly. Swallow those words you want to say, and simply buy yourself some time to be able to move from the emotional to the rational. Build healthy calluses. Ask God to toughen you up, so that you are not so prone to take everything personally. Seek to build a more healthy outlook so that those unintended remarks or actions that have hurt you in the past will start to bounce off. Bring it into the open. If you feel you have truly been offended, write out how you were hurt, and put it away for two days. Then read it again, and if you are still truly offended, determine how you will confront that person in a biblical, loving way. Chances are good that after two days you’ll tear up the paper and say to yourself that it’s really not that big a deal.
It will take God’s power to change these long-ingrained habits of hurt feelings, but if you are born from above, you have the power of God’s Spirit to enable you to “get over it.”
Jesus said we must know the truth, but don’t you find that often you don’t really want to know the truth about yourself if it hurts? It’s so easy to shift the blame, or offer excuses, or become defensive when someone brings us face to face with ourselves! But when we refuse to know the truth, then we choose to remain in bondage—to ourselves, no less!
Seems to me the sensible thing to do is face the music, as much as it might hurt, and then let the truth set us free. Jesus is truth; the Word of God is truth, and those are essential in our search for truth.
I want to talk about being set free from hurt feelings.
Set Free from Hurt Feelings
This is more a female problem than a male problem, because we women were created with more sensitive natures, and we feel things more deeply than most men do. What is the major reason we women are prone to get our feelings hurt so easily and so often? May I kindly, but clearly assert that it is because we see far too much as being all about us. Let me give you some examples:
You walk into a room where you don’t know many people. You feel very conspicuous and out of place, and because no one walks up to you right away and greets you, you take it personally and figure no one wants to talk with you. Your feelings are hurt A good friend makes a comment that you interpret to be critical. Instead of talking with her about it, you retreat with hurt feelings and allow it to damage your relationship. A business associate hasn’t returned your calls. You’ve left three messages the last three days. You have always felt that this person doesn’t like you, and this just confirms it further. Your feelings are hurt. Your boss asks you to re-do a report and make some changes and corrections. She says you need to improve your writing skills and gives you some specific criticism and suggestions for improvement. You take it personally and consider it an insult to your intelligence, and your feelings are hurt. Your husband comes home from work and has very little to say. Your questions seem to irritate him rather than draw him into a conversation. You interpret it to mean that he doesn’t like to talk with you, and you wonder if he still loves you. He has hurt your feelings. You learn that a friend at church had some other friends over for coffee and you were not invited. Your feelings are hurt. Someone says, “You look nice today,” and you think, “You mean, I don’t always look nice?” and your feelings are hurt.
Do any of these sound familiar? These are some everyday examples of self-inflicted pain that we can so easily heap upon ourselves when we allow our feelings to be hurt. Now, true, there are times when we can legitimately claim hurt feelings, but I wonder what percentage of the time our feelings are hurt, not because of someone’s harmful intentions or bad motives, but because we were overly sensitive.
We are very prone to jump to conclusions based on the look on someone’s face, the tone in someone’s voice, their body language, their choice of words, etc., and we very often assume that they are sending us negative messages—that it’s all about us.
Recently I learned about a woman whose feelings were hurt because no one sat at her table at a church function, and she assumed that no one liked her, put her coat on and was ready to go home. She remarked that it was just like high school when she was often left out. Baggage from her past still haunts her and causes her to think that it’s all about her when there was a very logical explanation as to why no one sat at her table.
Another woman told me that she didn’t feel welcome in a certain group because she didn’t know the people at her table, and they didn’t talk to her. Well, if the truth were known, they were probably all sitting there thinking the same thing—“Here I am at this function and nobody will talk to me, so nobody likes me, and I just don’t fit here.” It’s all about me!
What is it about your future that frightens you? Our friend, Fran, is struggling with her fear of being single forever. Jesus is trying to help her understand that as long as he is with her, there is no need to fear anything, including being single but that's hard for Fran to believe. As she meditates on her situation, she can almost hear Jesus talking to her, speaking truth that can set her free.
"Fran, if my plan for you is to be single, I guarantee that I can make you happy and contented," Jesus says, "if you will trust me. You see, Fran, if you live in fear of what might or might not be, you'll be miserable. I would never give you a spirit of fear, and right now you're fearful of being single forever. Can you realize how that makes me feel to see that you can't trust me for your future?"
"How you feel?” Fran is stunned. "You mean, it hurts you when I get upset about being single?"
"It hurts me to realize you don't really trust me with all your life," Jesus responds. "Have I ever failed you?"
"No, never," Fran replies. "I guess I never realized that this fear of being single is really a lack of trust in you, Lord. And I guess I never thought about how awful it is not to trust you, because you are totally trustworthy. Can you please forgive me?"
"Done," Jesus says. "You know, this is the same issue you faced when Jim was alive. Remember when you were worried that Jim had found someone else?"
Jesus reminds Fran of that terrible time early in their marriage. "Oh, yeah, I'd almost forgotten. Because Jim was working lots of overtime, I got to imagining he was in love with someone at work."
"You lived in a lot of fear for a few weeks, remember?” Jesus says. "And what was it you finally had to learn?"
"I remember you told me I wasn't trusting you. Trust is really important, isn't it, Lord?" Fran remarks.
"Yes, because without faith it's impossible to please me," Jesus explains. "And it's also good for you to remember that fear of the future is not limited to single people. Single people aren't living some second-class life, Fran. And married people don't have it all easy. Don't forget that."
"You're right, Lord; you always are. It's amazing how easy I forget that as much as I loved Jim and miss him, it wasn't always fun to be married," Fran replies. “You know, I'll probably have this same struggle again sometime before long."
"And I'll be there to remind you that I'm trustworthy," Jesus says. And with that, Fran smiles and closes her eyes for some much needed sleep.
The worst thing you and I can do is not to trust Jesus. He is God, he is all powerful, he loves us and has nothing in mind for us that isn't for our benefit. I hope, like Fran, you'll learn to trust him more and let go of your fears, whatever they are.
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Did you ever let your imagination run away with you? Our friend, Fran, is having that problem. She met a man at church who showed her some attention, and from that she's already thinking it will be the beginning of a new, good relationship. Though she waits hopefully all evening, David doesn't call, and now she's finally talking with Jesus about it. Though she doesn’t hear an audible voice, the Spirit of God residing in her imparts truth to her as though it were directly from the lips of Jesus.
He reminds her that she has allowed herself to blow this whole episode up into something much more than it ever was. If you let your imagination run wild, it easily gets into untrue thinking and that kind of thinking can cause you to do things you normally wouldn't think of doing.
"So, what you're telling me, Jesus, is that I'm beginning to make a fool out of myself over this man," Fran says quietly.
"Well, you're not at that stage yet, but you're headed in that direction. You've let your imagination read a lot into one brief conversation with a man you really don't know, Fran," Jesus explains to her.
"But it felt so good to have that male attention," Fran says, brushing away a couple of tears.
"I know," Jesus responds. "I understand your need for male attention; but you can trust me to meet your needs, and even if there isn't another man in your future, I am capable of fulfilling you and making your life very meaningful. Will you trust me?"
"Yes," Fran says, with the tears freely flowing now, "I will trust you, but I can't imagine living the rest of my life without a husband. I'm lonely; it's not fun being single in a married world."
"Well, you don't have to live the rest of your life, Fran," Jesus says very kindly, "just today. I've gotten you through the last few years, I can get you through today."
"But, Lord, I want to know: are you saying I may have to be single forever?" Fran asks, with fear in her voice.
"I'm saying you can trust me, whether single or married," Jesus replies.
"But, Lord, if I just knew someday I would be married, I could be happy waiting, even for lots of years—if I just knew," Fran says.
"And if you knew, you would never have to walk by faith, would you Fran," Jesus says. "Besides, you don't need to know the future; you just need to know that I'm going to be with you through all your futures, and I've promised to take care of you. Furthermore, I've told you that I have good plans for you; you can trust me."
"But what if your plans are for me to be single?" Fran repeats. Her fears of singleness are showing, and she struggles to understand how to trust Jesus for her future.
Fran has just met a man at a singles dinner at her church, and because he bought her a cup of coffee and asked for her phone number, she's all excited about the potential of this relationship.
She crawls into bed but can't sleep. She re-lives every minute and every word, and in her imagination, the importance of the occasion grows. The next morning, she sits down with her Bible to spend some time with Jesus, but finds her mind is totally uncontrollable. Finally, she just gives up, and rushes to get to work on time.
Several times during the day she finds herself staring at some papers, while daydreaming about David. Wonder if he'll call tonight? Jesus tries to get her attention, but she doesn't notice. She's enjoying her fantasies.
She leaves right at 5:00, rushing to her car, again ignoring the presence of Jesus. The kids seem more demanding than usual this evening, and she hurries them to finish their homework, do their chores, get their baths and get ready for bed.
As she's putting a load of laundry in, the phone rings, and Fran's heart stops. Maybe it's David! She finds her cell phone and waits until it rings one more time. Then tries to casually answer, only to discover it's not David, it's Patsy.
"Hey, Fran, I saw you leave with that new guy—what's his name?" Patsy asks.
"David," Fran replies, and they chat about the past evening a few minutes. Her mother calls and wants to chat, but Fran pretends to be busy in order to get her off the phone and free it up.
Finally at 11:00 she drags herself to bed, feeling disappointed. For the first time the whole evening, she's aware of Jesus beside her and begins to talk to him. "Lord, I was really hoping David would call," Fran admits. "If he really was interested, don't you think he'd call tonight?” "Fran," Jesus says, "I want you to think about what you've done since meeting David last night. What did you think about all day?"
"David," Fran says rather embarrassed.
"And what kind of thoughts did you have? Were they true?" Jesus asks.
"What do you mean? There was nothing wrong with my thoughts, I was just kinda daydreaming, I guess. Thinking he would call, what I'd say, where we'd go, what I'd wear. Just daydreaming; no harm done," Fran answers.
"That kind of daydreaming does some harm, Fran," Jesus teaches her. "You see, you were allowing yourself to imagine all kinds of things based on one very short, very casual conversation. Frankly, Fran, I wouldn't call that truthful thinking.” It's a painful lesson, but one Fran needs to learn about herself.
Our friend, Fran, is learning some valuable lessons about her singleness and her trust in the Lord. She attended a singles dinner at her church and met a nice man, David, who was at her table.
After the dinner and program, David asks if Fran can have a cup of coffee with him at the coffee shop down the street. She looks at her watch and remembers that she promised the sitter to be home by 10:30—but she can't resist. "Well, sure David, I can talk for a few minutes," Fran replies, and they start the short walk to the restaurant. All the time Jesus tries to send a warning to Fran, but she’s not paying attention. She thinks: "It's a public place, and I met him at church. What harm could there be?"
The next hour flies by, as Fran and David talk. She learns that he is an engineer, just transferred to the city, and is divorced. He has two sons, ages 11 and 13. He became a Christian after his divorce five years ago.
Suddenly Fran looks at her watch. "Oh, my goodness, it's almost 11:00. I must go; the sitter is expecting me.” David walks her back to the church parking lot, and as she rushes to her car, he takes her hand and starts to put his arm around her. It makes Fran uncomfortable, and she pulls away. He asks if he can call her, and she gives him her number.
On the way home, her heart is flying high. "He liked me; he really liked me. And he was so easy to talk to. Got a good job, obviously the divorce wasn't his fault and besides he wasn't a Christian then. Nice guy." As Fran thinks about David, she suddenly realizes that Jesus is there, as he always is, and so she says to him, "Well, there was no harm in that, Jesus, right? It felt good to have some male attention. It's been a long time."
"No, nothing wrong," Jesus says. "Except you were inconsiderate of your sitter and you almost allowed a man you don't even know to kiss you.”
"Oh, I don't think he was trying to kiss me, Lord, really..." Fran responds without conviction. "But don't I deserve some fun once in awhile? Good grief!" Fran expresses her frustration. "Do I have to always be the responsible mother?"
She is reminded by that inner voice of God’s Spirit just how vulnerable she is right now. She’s been by herself for quite awhile and any male attention is going to start the chemistry going. She seems to hear Jesus say, “Please, don't let your need for male attention cause you to abandon all your common sense."
Fran hurries in the house, apologizing to the sitter, who is obviously worried and upset. She pays her a little extra and watches as she walks home across the street, feeling guilty for being thoughtless.
We continue the story of Fran and Jesus, as Fran, a single woman, learns some tough lessons about relationships with men and trusting the Lord. While this episode is directed to single women, I think it will be helpful to men and marrieds as well.
Fran is a young widow with two school-aged children. Since her husband's untimely death, she has struggled to earn a living and be the mother she wants to be. It takes most of her time and energy, but there are times when she feels lonely and really wishes there was a man in her life. She did have a brief relationship with a man named Barry, but that didn’t work out.
As she heads to the church for a singles dinner, she says to the Lord, "You know, I never thought I'd be part of this singles' scene again, Lord. And here I am, going to a dinner for singles. I'm not real comfortable with it, but at least I don't feel like a square peg in a round hole when I'm with the singles. I just don't seem to fit in anywhere here at the church anymore."
As she pulls into the parking lot, Fran's new friend, Patsy, pulls in beside her. "Hi, Fran, glad you came tonight," Patsy calls to her. "You'll meet lots of nice people here—who knows, Fran, maybe even a man."
"Yeah, right, what man wants a woman with two kids to raise?" Fran asks with a laugh, but inwardly hoping that there might be some man here tonight who would find her interesting.
She and Patsy decide to sit together across from a man who introduces himself as David, new to the city and the church. He looks about 37, nice looking, clean-cut, and Fran enjoys their conversation.
"You know,” Fran thinks, "he really seems to be interested in talking to me. And I've already told him I have two kids. Didn't seem to scare him off.” Fran is a little excited.
"Fran," Jesus seems to say to her, "you don't have to worry about your kids. They're great kids and the right man will not find them a problem."
"I wonder if David might be that man." Fran thinks.
Quickly she admonishes herself not to let her imagination run wild. “You've just met him,” she says to herself. “Just talk to him like any other person, be interested in him because he's a person, and don't start projecting about a possible relationship. It's much too soon.” But she can’t help thinking that he is paying a lot of attention to her.
Would you agree that often the most difficult person in your life—the one who holds you back and keeps you saddled with your past; the one who gets in your way of moving forward to do great things for God; the one who floods your mind with the wrong thoughts, continually sending you wrong messages about yourself—is you?
If we’re honest, I think most of us will answer, “My biggest problem is ME!” Reminds me of the old song:
Not my brother, not my sister, but it’s me, O Lord
Standing in the need of prayer. (Standing in the Need of Prayer – Hymn)
At the core of most of our “issues” is our own self. We either create or exacerbate most of our troubles. Now, this really should come as good news, because we can do something about ourselves with God’s help. That means that we can be set free from ourselves if and when we decide to take God at his word and claim the victory that is ours in Christ.
The Truth About Truth
Jesus said, “Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free” (John 8:32).
Truth sets you free—free from error, free from bad choices, free from the consequences of untruth. If indeed truth sets you free, then the converse is true: Error keeps you in bondage. In any area of your life where you are in bondage, it is because you are believing something that is not true or refusing to believe what is true.
And yet, if you look around you, if you look in your own heart, you'll discover that frequently we don't seek after truth. In the Bible we find that people suppressed the truth, exchanged it for lies, rejected the truth, refused to love the truth, denied the truth, just to mention a few. That has been going on through all of history, and it certainly continues today.
In fact, in our culture truth has become relative. Believe what you please, most people think, as long as it works for you. But that doesn’t change the truth about truth. You're entitled to your own opinion, but you're not entitled to your own truth!
Satan, our enemy, is a masterful liar. He knows how dangerous truth is to him and his schemes. He can't trap you if you know and obey the truth. He can't get you off on the wrong track if you know the truth. He can't tempt you to sin if you know the truth. Truth sets you free from satan's power in your life. The last thing he wants you to know is the truth as found in Jesus and the Word of God. Therefore, he throws up every roadblock he can think of to keep you from the truth.
There are three things about truth that I want you to remember:
Truth hurts. When Jesus asked a crowd "If I am telling you the truth, why don't you believe me?", they got very angry with him because he had just told them the truth about themselves, which was that they were not of Abraham but of satan. He told them that truth and, as you can imagine, it hurt their feelings and enraged them, and so, as is often the case when truth hurts, they wanted to kill the messenger.
Now, if they had listened and believed that truth, even though it hurt them greatly, it would also have set them free. But they were too shortsighted to realize that, and so they rejected the truth.
I find that there are areas in my own life where I reject the truth because it hurts. I recall a phone call I received where someone told me some truth about myself that was painful. My first reflex was to drown it in busyness—just get busy with all I had to do and forget it. I wanted to tell myself it wasn't that important anyway. I wanted to think good things about myself and convince myself this information was not accurate. The truth hurt, and nobody likes pain. In fact, our natural reaction is to run away from pain of any sort.
Finally, I talked to myself and said, "Mary, this is the truth about you, and you better face it and do something about it.” To refuse to face the truth, even though it hurts, is simply foolish, to say the least. Truth sets you free, but it can also hurt.
As we face the challenge of trying to keep our lives in a biblically balanced state, we have to be sure we’re making the right deposits into our lives and then that we’re not wasting our strength and energy by making foolish withdrawals.
What is it in your life that drains your strength unnecessarily? If you could learn to plug up the energy leaks in your life, then you would have enough left to do what God has called you to do.
Here are five ways you may be draining your strength unnecessarily.
Your strength is wasted when you try to do more than you can do.
God has not called us to be all things to all people. Have you got too many irons in the fire? Maybe you have a hard time saying "No.” Whatever it is that causes you to over-commit, you need to get this area under control.
Learn to say “No.” No is not a four-letter word. Don’t let false guilt cause you to say yes when you should say no.
Your strength is wasted when you have too much stuff.
Did you know that the more you have, the more energy it takes out of you? You can save a lot of energy by just not accumulating so much stuff. Now you may not have to get rid of things, but just change your attitude toward them. But check it out: Are you spending a lot of your energy on things?
Your strength is wasted when you allow yourself to be negative.
Every time you get mired down in negative thoughts and words, you are wasting valuable energy and adding lots of stress to your life. We are to rejoice in the Lord always, and that means stay out of negative territory!
Your strength is wasted when you try to control the uncontrollable.
Learn to let go of that over which you have no control. I’m often amazed at how much time and energy I waste over what I cannot control!
Your strength is used up when your life is not disciplined.
Proverbs says that we die from lack of discipline, and I believe that many of us are drained of energy because we refuse needed discipline in our lives. That means doing things you don't want to do; it means making yourself establish good habits and schedules and sticking to them. It means denying yourself some things you really want.
Discipline is never much fun, but it brings wonderful fruits. And one of those benefits is that it supplies us with energy to do important things.
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Is it possible to live biblically balanced lives? I can tell you that it is possible, but it is not easy.
Pleasing God or Pleasing People?
If you’re ever going to get the right balance in your life—God’s balance—you’re going to have to care more about pleasing God than you do about pleasing people. You’ve got to want God’s approval more than you want the approval of people. You may find that hard to do, because our natural bent is to want the approval and acceptance of people. And we can become absolutely enslaved by a desire to receive the approval of people. Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ” (Galatians 1:10). This is a good verse to pray into your life. Ask God to develop you into the woman or man who cares more about pleasing God than pleasing people.
Making Deposits
Living balanced lives has to become intentional. So, to help you do this, I want you to think of yourself as a bank account, where deposits and withdrawals are made. Here are two very important deposits that you must intentionally put into your “bank accounts” if you ever hope to live biblically balanced lives:
Deposit the Word of God
Psalm 119:28: "My soul is weary with sorrow; strengthen me according to your word."
I hope you are involved in some kind of Bible study program all the time. You need in-depth study of God’s Word, and you need structured reading of the Bible. His Word strengthens us. I think of a couple who lost six children in one horrible automobile accident in 1993. Janet, their mother, shared with us that the Word of God was her constant source of strength to get her through those horrible days, and even yet, through the sorrow of losing her children. When you consistently deposit God’s Word into your mind, you are adding great strength and stamina to your life. It will get you through tough days.
Deposit the Joy of the Lord
Nehemiah 8:10b: "Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength."
How do you keep joy in your life? First, you control your thinking. Negative thoughts, critical thoughts, judgmental thoughts, complaining thoughts—these will all rob you of joy. Secondly, you confess your sins immediately and keep a clean slate with the Lord.
How can we find and keep a truly biblically balanced lifestyle? As Christ followers, our challenge is to get our priorities in line with God’s priorities. For example, we know from Scripture that these things are always a high biblical priority:
Getting to know God Your marriage – your mate Your children Family relationships Using our gifts in the body of Christ for the good of others
If you are a follower of Jesus Christ, these should be the priorities of our lives. When you allow anything to usurp these responsibilities, then your life is out of balance. Mine was for quite a few years when, in climbing the corporate ladder, I put my career ahead of my responsibility as a mother and took a job that required too much travel.
Zero Budgeting
Zero-budgeting is a fiscal policy which starts the budgeting process each year at zero. For example, just because you had money in the budget last year for travel, doesn't mean you'll have money in the budget this year for travel. You have to show the need for that budget money before it will be approved.
Wouldn't it be good for you to sit down with the Lord for a zero-budgeting session, with no pre-planned agenda, no assumptions, and see what goes and what stays in his plans for you? Jesus was able to say at the end of his short ministry, "I have finished the work you gave me to do.” That's because his agenda was always the Father's agenda. Time and again he said, "I do what the Father tells me to do.”
Zero-budgeting may lead you to some radical changes, or it may confirm that you're to stay where you are, doing what you're doing. But once you give God permission to set the agenda, then you have tremendous peace and freedom and you can say with Jesus, "I am doing what you gave me to do, Father.”
It may be that this zero-budgeting process comes later in life after you’ve already done your own thing and made some messes and you’re forced to live with those consequences. God understands that. You don’t have to live in perpetual regret if that is the case. God is masterful at taking us right where we are to where he wants us to be.
There is no one who hasn’t messed up at some point. But there is no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, and if you are now at a place where you can truthfully say that all you want is to know and do God’s will for your life and to spend the rest of your days doing the good works God wants you to do, then you’re in a good place. You’re ready to move forward and move into that biblically balanced lifestyle which he desires for each of his children.
How do we find the right biblical balance in our lives, especially for us workplace women? Think about your grandmother or great-grandmother. Did she have a job outside of her home? Probably not. She probably worked harder than you do, but she had a much more limited role than you do. I seriously doubt that she ever listened to a message on balancing her life. That would have been puzzling to her.
But today, we have many modern conveniences that make housework easier, things she never dreamed of, and as a result, we have accumulated many different roles and our lives are far more fragmented than hers was. For example, consider all the hats you are wearing—or trying to wear. Your hats could include wife, mother, employee, employer, care giver, church worker, house cleaner, cook, chauffeur, counselor—and the list goes on!
The world approves of us based on how many hats we wear and how successfully we juggle them. Our society honors and recognizes people who are busy. We judge people's worth and value by the length of their "to do" list. Too often we brag about our long hours and wear our burnout as the badge of credibility.
So, in trying to wear all these hats, you and I are challenged to make better and better decisions about our activities and how we spend our limited time. I want to get to the end of my life and hear Jesus say, "Well, done, good and faithful servant," and I'm certain you do, too. We will be good stewards of our time and our “hats” as we continually grow in our ability to make better and better choices, based on God's Word, not on our culture, not on other's expectations, not on our own mindsets and prejudices.
My Mom passed away at the age of 95. She led a very simple life as a wife and mom. She was never a soccer mom, never had a career, traveled very little, spent her days in her home—and in the Word of God. At her memorial service, her children and grandchildren called her blessed because she left us such a great legacy as a godly woman who kept her simple life in balance by staying grounded in the Word of God—reading it, memorizing it, teaching it, and loving it.
I know we live in a different time than our grandmothers did, but we still need to keep our lives grounded in the truth of God’s Word. I encourage you to think about what your legacy will be to your family and friends.
We hear a lot about finding balance in our lives, especially those of us who are working women. And for Christian working women, we have a completely different yardstick by which to measure the balance of our lives, because we have—or should have—an eternal perspective: What matters for eternity?
Our dilemma is: How do we know what a balanced life is—and how do we find it? Which of these statements would you say are true? Your life is in balance when:
◊ You accomplish everything we plan to do each day.
◊ You are able to meet all the expectations others have of you.
◊ You never feel pressured or frazzled.
◊ You never have to say “no” to anyone.
◊ You can juggle many balls in the air at the same time.
◊ You are very good at multi-tasking.
Are these the signs of a balanced life? No, not necessarily. We need a biblical perspective of what it means to live a balanced life. So, let’s begin by asking the question: Why am I here?
Why Am I Here?
If you are a Christ-follower, you are here to do the good works he has planned for you to do:
“For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do” (Ephesians 2:10).
You are not to be lazy; you are not here to please yourself; you are to be about the Father’s business. God does not exist to make us happy and fulfilled and solve all our problems. We belong to him, and we are here to do what he planned for us to do.
In the last decades we’ve been programmed to believe that we deserve to have what we want. Well, God’s Word certainly affirms that each individual is special to God, created in his image, and loved by him. But we are not here to be doted upon and fussed over. We are here to do good works.
When you get outside of that parameter, then you’re in trouble. Here are some of the reasons you can get outside of God’s plan for your life:
You start “doing your own thing.” You plan your life and ask God to bless it instead of seeking to know and do his plan. You try to do your good works and some others as well. You fail to seek God’s will. You allow others to dictate what we should do and be.
If you want to live the kind of balanced life that will count for eternity, you have to be intentional about doing it.
I remember wondering why IBM would choose such a motto for the company—just “Think”. Doesn’t everybody think?, I thought. Now I understand the importance of that simple one-word motto, because often we just don’t think enough. For example, how frequently are we engaging our mouths, saying things without thinking? And that usually ends up causing all kinds of trouble.
A friend once told me that her teenage daughter and she had agreed to each wear a bracelet that says “Think”, as a way to remind them to think before they speak. Well, I got to thinking about that, and decided that was a good idea. Just to remind myself to think about what I’m going to say before I say it. Don’t you think this could have dramatic positive results for all of us—if we just took time to think more?
Psalm 141:3 says, “Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips.” Perhaps wearing a bracelet that says “Think” will help us to set guards over our mouths so that we think about what we say before we say it.
Today I want to give you an acrostic of the word “think,” to help you determine whether you should say what you are starting to say or not.
T is true: Is it true? Do you know for certain that what you are just about to say is true? If not, don’t say it.
If you think before you speak and determine that you’re not sure what you’re about to say is true, this will eliminate most gossip. Gossip is usually something we’ve heard but don’t really know for sure, but we freely pass it on. After all, it’s juicy and we just want to tell somebody that juicy tidbit. But if we start to think before we speak, and ask ourselves, “Is this true?”, we’ll go a long way to eliminating gossipy talk—and that’s a very good thing.
Also, it will keep you from imagining bad things that could happen, like “They’ll probably lay off a lot of us,” or “I’m sure he’ll give me a bad review.” You don’t know those imagined bad things to be true, so don’t say them to yourself or anyone else.
H is helpful. Are the words you’re just getting ready to say going to help anyone? If not, don’t say them.
Ephesians 4:29 is one of the most powerful verses in the Bible, in my opinion, and if we practiced it, we would think before we speak. It says, “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”
Some years ago I began praying this verse into my life, and I encourage you to do the same. Then I noticed that when I would start to say something, I would often hear that inaudible voice of God’s Spirit saying, “Is this going to help anyone else; will it benefit those who listen?” That has caused me to stop in the middle of lots of sentences, as I realized that I didn’t need to say what I was planning to say because it wasn’t helpful to anyone else.
Can you even imagine the wonderful changes that would take place on our jobs, in our churches, and in our homes if we determined not to speak any words that were unwholesome, that did not benefit others? That would eliminate griping and complaining; it would keep us from nagging people; it would cause us to stop passing on gossip. My goodness, it would make a difference in the way we live.
So, today, think about what you’re going to say before you say it. It’s so much easier to swallow those unhelpful words than it is to try to recover from them once they are said. If it’s not helpful, just don’t say it.
I stands for inspiring. Will your words inspire the person who hears them in some way, even if it’s very small? If not, maybe you don’t need to say them.
Now I need to make it clear that I’m talking about inspiring someone for good purposes, because it’s possible to inspire someone to do something wrong. But how wonderful it is when someone speaks inspiring words to us. I remember a day when I particularly needed some encouragement,
I've been focusing on our race—the race that God has set before each of his children. I've pointed out that we each have our own unique race, and you don't have to run mine and I don't have to run yours. And unlike earthly races, all of us who run can win if we run with perseverance the race marked out for us, and get rid of all the stuff that entangles and hinders us.
But the last part of that passage in Hebrews 12:1-2 is probably the most important: Let us fix out eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Any successful runner knows one critical rule of running: Stay focused on the finish line. Winning athletes are those who can keep focused no matter what's going on around them.
The longer I run the race that God has marked out for me, the more I realize that if I stay focused on Jesus, if I never lose the wonder of his love for me, if I talk about him and think about him and read about him, if I stay in first love with Jesus, I can run with perseverance. But when I take my eyes off Jesus, I become disappointed, discouraged, and ready to quit.
Have you taken your eyes off Jesus lately? Oh, when you do, that's when you start to get entangled and that's when sin moves in. When you take your eyes off Jesus, you're a sitting duck for all of Satan's flaming arrows that are headed your way to keep you from winning this race. People will fail you. Churches will fail you. Dreams will be shattered. Hopes will be dashed. And if you start looking at those things, instead of Jesus, the race becomes drudgery and dismal.
I think of many people I know who started running their races with enthusiasm and commitment, but they took their eyes off Jesus and became disillusioned. Let me assure of this: Jesus will never fail you. Please, stay fixed on Jesus. The Christian race comes down to this simple—not necessarily easy—but simple priority and that is, fixed on Jesus.
We want to be able to say with the Apostle Paul:
"I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day—and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing” (2 Timothy 4:7-8).
Therefore: Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith.
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Are you training to run in the Olympics or maybe run a marathon? Not many of us can qualify to run in these difficult races. But we're all qualified to run in the race that God has marked out for each of us. And it's much more important to run in that race than in the Olympics. Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us (Hebrews 12:1). Can you imagine a runner at the Olympics or in a marathon coming on the track with a coat on and a backpack and a purse? No way! They get rid of anything that will slow them down even a millisecond.
In the same way, if you're going to run your race effectively, you must throw off everything that hinders you. What is hindering you?
Maybe it's laziness and lack of discipline. You just haven't yet disciplined yourself to study God's Word and pray like you know you should. Oh, you keep intending to and you really want to. But somehow, when the alarm goes off, it's just too easy to roll over and go back to sleep or just put it off. Without the Word of God firmly entrenched in your mind and heart, you're never going to run the race to win.
Are you hindered by the cares of this world? Do you let money or people or jobs or other circumstances get you down all the time? If you worry and fret a lot, you can't run the race very well. Don't you hear all those people in the stands encouraging you: "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God" (Philippians 4:6).
Could it be that you're hindered by busyness? Maybe your life is full of all kinds of things and activities. Not necessarily bad things, but they crowd your life so much that there is no room left for the things of God.
Or perhaps you're entangled with your past, or your low self-esteem, or your failures. Can't you hear Rahab calling to you now. She's saying, "Forget what is behind and strain toward what is ahead."
What sin is entangling you? Could it be lack of sexual purity? Is it an unforgiving spirit? Have you been dishonest or deceptive? Is it a tongue that is out of control, complaining, criticizing, judging? Can't you hear the Apostle Paul saying to you: "You were running a good race. Who cut in on you and kept you from obeying the truth?” (Galatians 5:7).
We're surrounded with the saints of old, watching us run our race, because they know the joy that is set before us, and they know we're going to miss the prize if we keep trying to run with all that stuff holding us back.
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us (Hebrews 12:1). As you run your race, all around you are witnesses to cheer you on and encourage you.
Who's watching you? Well, Noah is. Noah understands what it's like to be ridiculed while you're running the race. When he set out to do what God told him to do, he looked entirely foolish. "You're building a boat for what—a flood?” Can't you hear their friends and neighbors laughing at him, calling him a fool. Been ridiculed lately? Maybe your family has no appreciation for this race you're running. Perhaps your coworkers think you're nuts for running this Christian race. Remember, Noah is watching you from the grandstands in the clouds. And he's cheering you on.
So is Abraham, that great man of faith. God sent him to a place he would later receive as his inheritance, even though he did not know where he was going. Do you feel like that's where God has you—going some place but he hasn't yet told you where? Abraham kept running that race in spite of his lack of understanding. You see, Abraham knew how to run by faith, not by sight. And he's up there now in those grandstands, just yelling his lungs out to encourage you to keep on running, even though you don't know exactly where God's taking you, but you know he has good plans for you.
Moses is right there on the front row in those heavenly grandstands. Moses understands the fear of the Red Sea that's in front of you right now—that impossibility that appears to be more than you can handle, and it looks like your enemy is going to get to you soon and destroy you. Moses has been there; so he's up there telling you to: "Keep looking at the invisible God. Don't give up.”
Rahab's watching you run your race. Rahab understands rejection. She knows what it's like to be from the wrong side of the tracks, to have a sordid past. But Rahab found forgiveness, and she got right in the race, a transformed woman, and she won big time. Rahab's pulling for you. She's saying, "If I can make it, you can make it! Don't quit!"
For many of you, there's your grandmother, your grandfather, your aunt or uncle, maybe even your mother or father or other loved ones. They're watching you from the heavenly grandstands. Their race is finished; they've won the prize. And they don't want anything less for you. Since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let's run our races to win!
Are you a good runner? I've never gotten into running for exercise. But there's one race I want to win, and that's the race that God has set out for me. As believers we're all in a race, and as we saw yesterday from 1 Corinthians 9, we should be in that race to win.
Hebrews 12:1-2 gives us some further good information about running our race: Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. The good news is that we each have our own race to run; we're not competing with each other. We are told to run with perseverance the race marked out for us. God has a race planned for me and it's different from the one he has planned for you. But it is marked out; and each of us has one. So, I don't have to run your race, and you don't have to run mine. But each of us needs to know the race marked out for us, and then run it to win.
Do you know what race God has marked out for you? He's not trying to hide it from you; it's there. But first you've got to get on the running field and start moving. You won't find the race marked out for you sitting on the sidelines. Maybe you've been trying to run somebody else's race—trying to be like someone else or wishing you could do what he or she does, instead of accepting the race God has for you. Every race is important; one is no more important than another. But it's foolish to try to run someone else's race. Run the race marked out for you.
And the writer to the Hebrews says to run it with perseverance. Marathon runners go through what they call "hitting the wall," that place in the race where they feel as though they cannot possibly continue. Everything in them wants to quit, but they've learned through training and experience that if they'll keep going, they can run through that wall, find their second breath and finish the race.
Have you hit the wall in your spiritual race lately? Ready to quit? It happens to all of us, but don't give up! Run with perseverance the race set out for you. Keep running through the wall. Your faith is being tested, your endurance is being strengthened; God is working on your behalf, but you've got to run with perseverance.
I'm sure we're all familiar with the Olympic games and enjoy watching the many different races they have. It is amazing to see how hard and long those athletes work to qualify for the Olympics. There’s a race that you and I are in, and it's a lot more important than the Olympic races. It's described in 1 Corinthians 9:24-26: Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. Therefore I do not run like someone running aimlessly; Paul gives us three important guidelines here about running our race.
First, he says to run in such a way as to get the prize. Lately I've heard lots of reports of how some schools are trying to eliminate any system that has winners and losers, so that nobody's self-esteem will be wounded by not winning. Well, let me tell you, that's not the way we are exhorted to run our race for God. We're out there to win. Just participating and making a show isn't enough.
Second, we have to go into strict training. I think this is the part where many of us lose our races; we haven't yet gone into strict training. What does that mean in our Christian race? It means purity of life; it means building our spiritual muscle and endurance through Bible study, prayer, fellowship. It means imposing on ourselves the sacrifices and disciplines that will make us strong.
Third, we are not to run aimlessly. We should have purpose, goals, and a strong commitment to get to the finish line. We can't flit from one thing to another; we must stay focused and run with a purpose.
All of our hearts stop beating when we see the Olympic ceremonies where those medals are awarded and the national anthems are played. When you're in the winners' circle, all the hard work and discipline are worth it.
I think if we could really get a vision of the prize that awaits us—that eternal prize—we'd get more serious about running our races. Can you imagine standing in God's winners' circle, hearing him say, "Well done, good and faithful servant," and winning a crown that you can then cast at the feet of Jesus? That scene makes the Olympics look like kid's play. Don't you want to be in that winners' circle? If so, you have to run to win, you have to go into strict training, and you have to run with a purpose.
Recently a friend said to me that she finds herself just restless with what she is doing. She said it was just an uneasiness in her spirit, wondering if she’s where she supposed to be. I imagine there are others in that same place, so I thought it would be helpful to talk about that. I’ll give you ten very practical common sense questions you can use to see if you’re really satisfied with your job. I think it will be a good exercise for all of us to evaluate our own job satisfaction.
Question 1: Are you sticking with your job simply because you’re afraid you can’t find another one?
Whenever fear is part of your motivation, you have to think twice because fear is never of God. Fear is an absence of faith, and it can cause you to make very poor choices. Obviously, you should not hastily decide to leave a job just because everything’s not going your way. But if fear of not finding another job is the only reason you’re hanging onto the job you have, it is likely that you’re simply not trusting God in this matter like you should.
We are told that it is much easier to find another job while you’re still employed, so if you think you’re staying in a job for the wrong reasons, it might be a wise move to quietly begin a job search and see what possibilities are out there.
Question 2: Did you start your career because you were genuinely interested in it, or only because you needed the money or someone coerced you into it?
Have you ever looked back at a career or job decision you made and wonder whatever caused you to go in that direction? It has happened to me. You know, that can simply be a function of lack of maturity or lack of good counsel or just moving too quickly. But if you’re in a job or career for which you have no real interest, no passion, or no particular giftedness, it’s going to be difficult to be satisfied with that job. In fact, you will become more dissatisfied as the weeks and months roll along.
It is not unusual to recognize a wrong job decision at some point in your career. But that doesn’t mean you’re stuck there forever. If you know the job is not right for you, then it’s time to start planning your next move. Plan carefully so as not to make another mistake but move ahead. Don’t let that rut keep you from reaching out to something new that God may have for you.
Question 3: Do you feel healthy at work or do you regularly worry or feel sick about going in the next day?
If going in to work “turns your stomach,” creating physical problems, then it’s pretty certain that something is wrong. Maybe it’s not the job itself which is the problem, but a particular person that you work with or for. It’s helpful to separate the actual job from other things about the job that may be difficult for you. Then you would want to ask yourself if you want to give up a job that suits you, one where you truly enjoy the work, just because of a personality clash or heavy workload or some other circumstance.
Or it could be that you simply allow yourself to worry way too much about little things, and that is creating the health issues for you. Jesus told us not to worry, because our heavenly Father is watching over us. If you carry around a load of worry all the time, as though by worrying you can solve the problem, remember that has never worked! God may have you in your job to teach you to trust him and to let go of the little stuff—to cast all your care on him because he cares for you.
Question 4: Do you feel as though your rate of pay is fair?
Who of us would ever say we couldn’t use a little more money? But the question is: Do you feel you are being paid fairly, competitively, according to the work you do? Now, you may find it difficult to be objective about this question, so a good suggestion is to do some research and find out what the rate of pay is for your type of job in your geographical area. You might find that you are doing quite well, or maybe not,
In Romans 12:1-2 we are admonished not to be "conformed to this world.” Since we are living in a world foreign to God and his principles, it is terribly important that we do not allow the world to shove us into its mold. The church Pergamum lived right where Satan had his throne. Yet they remained true to the name of Jesus (Revelation 2).
Could that be said of you and me? Living in this alien world, are we still living lives true to Jesus and his gospel? Our society, for example, is addicted to self and everybody's out for themselves. Self-glory and self-satisfaction are the chief aim of most of the people where you live.
I don't know about you, but I'm at the point that if I hear "self-esteem" one more time, I'm going to explode. Aren't you sick of hearing how everything wrong with anybody is because they have "low self-esteem"? We were singing the hymn May the Mind of Christ My Savior in church recently which has this verse: May the love of Jesus fill me, as the waters fill the sea
Him exalting, self abasing; this is victory. As I sang that verse, I thought, self abasing? Do we know what we're singing? That means, putting self down in a world that says you have to feel good about yourself. In a world that insists you cannot be a healthy person if you don't have very high self-esteem. Self abasing? That's pretty radical stuff!
My friends, "Him exalting, self abasing; this is victory" is the truth of Scripture. When we exalt Jesus and die to our own selves, we are victorious. We'll feel good, but not about ourselves. We'll be fulfilled, but not self-fulfilled. When we fill up with self, we ask for depression, for discouragement, for defeat, because self is our problem, not our solution.
In the midst of a world gone crazy for self, will you live a life that says "Him exalting, self abasing; this is victory"? The more you think about yourself, the more miserable you'll be. The more you exalt Jesus Christ, the more you are filled with his love, the more you'll know what your mission in life is. You don't need to work at having good self-esteem; you need to know Jesus in depth and from that comes a right and balanced view of who you are in Christ.
"I know where you live" Jesus says to us. And I want you to be true to my name right there in the midst of that self-centered society. This is victory.
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Have you ever suffered prejudicial treatment? It comes in all forms, and it seems this world is full of it. I'm quite certain that all of you know what it's like to live in a world full of prejudice and hatred, where people are maligned and mistreated because of the color of their skin or their cultural heritage. We live in a world that is full of injustice, where fairness and fair play are rare commodities.
John wrote to the church in Pergamum in Revelation 2:13a: "I know where you live—where Satan has his throne. Yet you remain true to my name.” We are living in Satan's territory, and one of his most effective tricks is to prejudice people against each other.
As believers, we must search our hearts and attitudes and make certain that we do not harbor any kind of prejudice that would cause us to treat people in unfair and hurtful ways. It could be that your parents taught you to be prejudiced, and you need to clean out that wrong teaching. Or maybe you have developed your own prejudice toward certain people or certain types.
There should be no trace of any kind of racial prejudice among Christians. We should be color-blind. Do you have friends of a different race? Do you fellowship with believers from another culture? If not, you are missing some enriching and wonderful blessings in your life.
You know, these prejudicial attitudes can be very subtle. For example, even though we know that homosexuality is a sin, we still should not have prejudicial attitudes toward people who are homosexual. They are people, created by God, loved by God, and we should not shun them because of their lifestyle. Many Christians have failed to understand that you can hate the sin but love the sinner. Thank goodness that is true, because we're all sinners and yet God loves us.
Do you tend to treat people better or worse based on how they're dressed, or how smart they are, or whether they're important people or not? That is prejudicial treatment, and it is unbiblical.
It's hard to live in this world and not be caught up in prejudice of some kind or another because it's all around us. But like the church at Pergamum, Jesus knows where we live and he wants us to stay true to his name, to his standards, to his way right in the midst of all that prejudice. We can do it, because we have his power to do it in us. Remember, he knows where you live.
I want you to know that Jesus knows where you live. And he understands that as a Christ-follower, you are not living in friendly territory, but he wants you and me to remain true to his name, even in the midst of this foreign land.
For example, Jesus knows that we live in a world that believes owning and having are the trademarks of success. Where money is power and influence is bought and sold. Where your value and your worth are often based on your bank account.
It is not easy to live in this foreign land and not be bitten by the money bug. Jesus told us we cannot serve God and Money, with a capital "M", because he wants us to understand that money has spiritual power. That means it can exert an incredibly strong influence over us and cause us to do things we would never dream of otherwise.
We've seen many people who've been caught doing all kinds of wrong things for money. And we may think that we would never do that. But don't be so sure. Money corrupts quickly and we are all susceptible to its power.
What can we do, living in this world where money is king, to keep from being caught in this web of greed? First, we must constantly pray about the power of money in our lives. I often pray, "Lord, make me positionless and possessionless," and by that I mean, "Make me aware that I own nothing; everything I have is a gift from you and your name is on the title. And any position I have is an opportunity for me to serve you and others. So help me to remember that I am positionless and possessionless.”
Do you own things or do your things own you? One thing that will free you up from the power of money is to simplify your life and get rid of some stuff. Do you find this as hard to do as I do? All you have to do is walk through any mall or browse through Amazon, and you can see a dozen things you think you can't live without, and the power of those things starts to take over. Maybe we need to stop shopping; just stop looking so we are not tempted.
If we want to remain true to the name of Jesus, we must put disciplines into our lives that free us from the power of money and greed. Jesus knows where we live, and he knows that everyone around us is money hungry. But he can give us the power to live free of this greed if we will let him.
In Revelation 2, we see what Jesus says to the church in Pergamum, "I know where you live—where Satan has his throne. Yet you remain true to my name” (Revelation 2:13a). I can relate to that church, can't you? We live in a foreign land where temporarily Satan is in charge. And sometimes it feels like we're aliens from Mars or something, because we are often out of place in this satanically-controlled world.
But Jesus says to us what he said to the church in Pergamum: I know where you live—in the midst of a society that laughs at God's principles of sexual purity. Dear friends, we must not let this world system shove us into its mold when it comes to sexual principles and standards.
I remember when thousands of young people in Florida made a pledge to live celibate, pure lives, and not have sex until married. The media hardly covered the story, and when they did, it was as though these were just a small group of weird young people making this ridiculous pledge to live a pure sexual life.
The world actually believes it's not only ridiculous, but impossible to live by Christian principles regarding sex. When we suggest that teaching abstinence before marriage is the best way to be healthy and contented, they react with condescension and disbelief. You can't expect people to abstain from sex, they say, just because they're not married.
May I say something very clear and plain: It is certainly possible for unmarried people to live celibate lives. That is not mission impossible, and it is not weird. Oh, it will take discipline and self-control, but anything worthwhile requires discipline and self-control. Don't be deceived by the messages you hear all around you, either for yourself or your children. It is possible to live pure lives even in this world.
Remember, Jesus knows where we live. He knows we are bombarded with illicit sex all the time; he knows how the standards have been lowered in our society with the sexual revolution. But he also knows that if we lower our standards, we will pay a terrible price, just as many have already.
Don't lower your standards; don't be intimidated by the people around you who talk as though free sex is normal and natural. It is not free; it is very costly, and you will pay a high price if you don't live a pure life.
Jesus knows where you live, and he wants you to remain true to his name right there where you are. He'll give you the power to do it, so don't give up.
Do you sometimes feel like nobody really understands what you have to put up with? Nobody really knows what it's like to live in your shoes—in your world? In writing to the church in Pergamum, the Lord Jesus said through John, "I know where you live—where Satan has his throne. Yet you remain true to my name" (Revelation 2:13a).
Jesus understands where you live, and he knows you and I are living our lives where Satan has his throne. Satan is temporarily in power, and we live and work right in the middle of his territory. It's analogous to living in a foreign land, where you speak a different language, have a totally different culture, and a completely alien set of values to everyone else.
But Jesus says, I know where you live—and where you work. Right in the midst of people who care nothing about spiritual things. They don't want to talk about Jesus, and what you find exciting and encouraging would bore many of them to death, because they're spiritually blind.
How do we manage in that kind of world? Well, Jesus says we are to be in this world but not of it. So, we are not to allow the people of this world to pull us down to their level. Yet we are to be available and open to be their friends, to help them when we can, to spend time with them for edifying and harmless reasons.
Each of us has to pray a lot and ask God how we draw these lines in our own lives. For example, if the conversation among your coworkers is almost always crude, immoral, degrading or negative, you probably don't want to voluntarily put yourself into those group gatherings. Admittedly, that could make you appear to be a loner, but if you have a loving attitude toward these people, you can still have an impact on some of them.
Usually we exert influence in one-on-one situations rather than group settings. So, look for ways to develop relationships with individuals and spend time getting to know them. People are more willing to be open one-on-one than in a group, so that may be one way to deal with this problem.
Since you live in enemy territory, don't be surprised to discover that those around you see life totally different because they don't have God's viewpoint. They are spiritually blind. But you must remain true to the name of Jesus. That's more important than anything else.
Remember Jesus knows where you live and he will be with you in your difficult work environment. So take heart, because he has overcome the world.
If you want to be inspired, just google “plants that grow in concrete” and you will see amazing pictures of all kinds of flowers and plants that are able to grow in the most difficult, unlikely places. I was totally mesmerized to see lovely flowers growing out of cracks in a sidewalk, beautiful blooms popping up from a pile of old tires—picture after picture of plants that bloomed in the most unlikely and difficult places. That’s what I’m talking about—the challenge each of us faces to make the very best of where we are, blooming where we are planted.
Have you ever had the run-away blues? The run-away blues are those days, those times in your life when you’d just love to run away. When the thought of going to the airport and catching the next flight out to anywhere else, rather than where you are, sounds like a really good idea. Run-away blues—who hasn’t had those days?
David expressed it so well in Psalm 55. He was in a bad place then; his enemies were threatening him, his mind was a jumbled mess, his heart was in anguish and he was frightened. Now mind you, that was the condition of King David, a man after God’s own heart, who was chosen by God to be the King of Israel. I mean, come on, David, why would you want to run-away? But listen to what he wrote: “Oh, that I had the wings of a dove! I would fly away and be at rest. I would flee far away and stay in the desert; I would hurry to my place of shelter, far from the tempest and storm” (Psalm 55:6-8). David was doing what he was supposed to do, as God’s appointed king, and yet he longed to fly away and be at rest. Are you right now where David was then? Well, aren’t you glad he was inspired by God to put his feelings in writing and leave them for you today? It says that you aren’t condemned for feeling like you want to run away. Even kings have those times. But you have a God who cares and who can bring release and relief for you, right there where you are.
After expressing his run-away desires and fears to God, David then says: As for me, I call to God, and the Lord saves me. Evening, morning and noon I cry out in distress, and he hears my voice. . . Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken (Psalm 55: 16, 22). I wanted to remind you of these words of hope, from a king who wanted to fly away from where God had planted him. Even in the midst of doing what God has called you to do, you can lose your bloom and the enemy can steal your joy. If that’s where you are, just call to God—cry out to him. Cast your cares on the Lord, and he will put a new bloom inside you, and your desert will become a garden where you’re blooming again and the joy of the Lord will again be your strength.
There’s a passage in Jeremiah that is a great example of what it means to “bloom where you are planted.” You’ll find it in Jeremiah 29, and it is a letter that the prophet wrote to the people whom Nebuchadnezzar had carried into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon. Get the picture? They are God’s chosen people, now refugees who have been forcibly relocated in Babylon. This was a foreign culture; there was no temple in Babylon; it was a pagan culture, worshipping many false gods.
They did not want to be in Babylon. This was not the way they had planned their lives. This went against everything they thought life would be. Surely God did not want them to be in Babylon! Surely this was the worst place in the world for these Israelites to have to live. And yet this is where they found themselves—this is where they were planted.
And here is what Jeremiah wrote to them: This is what the Lord Almighty, the God of Israel, says to all those I carried into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon: “Build houses and settle down; plant gardens and eat what they produce. Marry and have sons and daughters; find wives for your sons and give your daughters in marriage, so that they too may have sons and daughters.
A few years ago I was talking with a friend who has a painful past to deal with. There was some mental and physical abuse in her childhood, and of course she has struggled with the after-effects. But she was sharing with me how God is healing her and giving her freedom from this painful past.
She said, "Mary, I finally came to the conclusion that I could either magnify my past or magnify my Lord. If I magnify the past, I'll be defeated and depressed forever. So I've chosen to magnify the Lord in my life."
What are you magnifying in your life today? Are you so focused on the here and now that you can’t see much of anything else? That was the problem for the disciples when Jesus told them that he would be leaving them and they would see him no more—but then he promised that “in a little while” he would return and they would again rejoice.
A saint of old, Amos Wells, wrote: “Heal me of my blindness that blots out eternity with this bit of mortal life close pressed.” I wrote his prayer in my journal several years ago and have often repeated it to the Lord. You and I often need to be healed of the blindness that prevents us from seeing the unseen, from looking with forever eyes. What “bit of mortal life” is closing in around you so much that it is blotting out your view of eternity? What “little while” is stealing your joy and your strength?
The Psalmist said, “O, magnify the Lord with me and let us exalt his name together” (Psalm 34:3 KJV). If you choose to set your sites on the wrong things, and they get magnified, then you’ll find yourself in lots of mental and emotional upheaval. Our challenge, therefore, is to keep our eyes on the Lord.
Will you make a commitment to magnify the Lord? When you do that, it will start to crowd out all the other negative things of this “little while,” and you'll discover that life is sweeter, Jesus is nearer, and you have a little taste of what it's going to be like in heaven when we'll be right up front and see Jesus face to face.
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Like many of you, I have experienced that stage in life when my parents were aging and my brothers and I took on the responsibility of caring for them—role reversal, if you will. My Mom’s life did not end the way I had planned. Instead of living with me after Daddy died, and traveling with me, and doing fun things together in her last years, as I had imagined, she was confined to a wheelchair with dementia, in a home where she received 24/7 care. And I simply didn’t like it.
My prayer for months was, “Lord, her quality of life is so poor; her memory doesn’t work well; just take her on home to Heaven with you.” And then, God rather abruptly reminded me that I wasn’t in charge of the number of her days; he was. I was not the one to judge her quality of life; he was. I was not the one to determine whether her latter days were worthwhile and useful; he was.
We are living in that “just a little while” that Jesus referred to in John 16—that little while between his first coming and his second. And what sometimes seems long and intolerable to us takes on a different perspective when we live in light of eternity instead of constantly focusing on the “little whiles” of our present lives.
David wrote in Psalm in Psalm 39:4: Show me, O Lord, my life's end and the number of my days; let me know how fleeting is my life. And Moses prayed: Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom (Psalm 90:12). When Mom passed, God pulled back the curtains of Heaven and gave me a glimpse of how her life had been a blessing in that place where I thought her life had lost meaning. So many people told my brothers and me stories of how Mom had blessed them, just by being who she was right there in that place. The “little while” which seemed so long to me was part of God’s plan for using my Mom in a different place and a different way than I had planned.
Whatever your “little while” is looking like right now—for you or for someone you love—I want to encourage you to not to lose sight of the end of the story. “Little whiles” really don’t last forever and as Jesus told his disciples, “Now is your time of grief, but I will see you again and you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy.”
Do you have forever eyes? Forever eyes give us the ability to look beyond what’s happening all around us and see what the future looks like. I think one reason people have always been fascinated with fortune-tellers is because we have a natural curiosity about what’s in store for us. We want to know what the future holds.
Well, if you are a Christ-follower, if you’ve been born from above through faith in Jesus Christ, you certainly don’t need a fortune-teller to advise you of what’s in store for you, because Jesus has left us with very clear information. In John 16 Jesus explained to his disciples that he would be leaving them soon, after his death, burial and resurrection, but in just a little while their grief at his departure would turn to joy because he promised to come back.
In John 14 he gives them words of comfort, as he encouraged them not to let their hearts be troubled. He said he was going to prepare a place for them, “And,” he said, “if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am” (John 14:3). That was his promise to them and it is his promise to us. In a little while, as measured by eternal standards, Jesus is coming back to take us to be with him. We just have to learn how to navigate this “little while” in between.
I admit, it’s not easy to look through forever eyes some days. I mean, life just swallows you up at times, and the cares and concerns of everyday life seem to come over you like waves from a tsunami, don’t they? I know—I’ve been there often, but lately I’ve been focusing my mind on the fact that Jesus says “in a little while” my joy will be complete because I’ll be with him.
You probably know the familiar old song we’ve sung for years: “Turn your eyes upon Jesus, look full in his wonderful face, and the things of earth will grow strangely dim, In the light of his glory and grace.” It’s truly a simple thing to do—not always easy, but simple. Just turn your eyes on Jesus. Think about his love for you; think about what he’s done for you. Remember that someday you will see him face to face and your faith will turn to sight!
Hang in there, because in just a little while your joy will be full again. Jesus endured the cross and its shame for you and me; let’s be faithful to endure this “little while” in victory and peace as good soldiers of Jesus.
How many times as parents have we said to our children, “In just a little while”? They want something now and we keep advising them that they’ll have to wait “a little while,” and of course that never seems to satisfy them. “In a little while” sounds like forever to them.
Jesus gave us an admonition also. In one of his last conversations with his disciples, which we find recorded in John 16, Jesus said, “In a little while you will see me no more, and then after a little while you will see me.”
This totally confused the disciples, and they questioned among themselves what Jesus meant. Knowing their confusion, Jesus went on to say to them: “A woman giving birth to a child has pain because her time has come; but when her baby is born, she forgets the anguish because of her joy that a child is born into the world. So with you: Now is your time of grief, but I will see you again and you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy” (John 16:21-23).
We are living today in this “little while” that Jesus referred to. It’s the time between when Jesus first came to earth and then after his death, burial and resurrection, returned to the Father, and the time he has promised to come again and we will join him in his righteous kingdom. And this “little while” is exactly that in light of eternity. It’s a blink of the eye compared to endless time when we will be with Jesus. But oh my, it seems long to us sometimes, doesn’t it?
What is burdening you down right now? What is sapping your joy and your strength? What is giving you that run-away feeling, causing you discouragement and grief? I want to remind you that in just a little while this little time will end and if you are a Christ-follower and you’ve been born into God’s family by faith in Jesus Christ, you will again rejoice and no one can take away that joy—in just a little while.
So, focus your eyes on eternity, don’t let the enemy of your soul beat you down, because it’s just a little while until we will see Jesus and we will rejoice again.
Does life seem just too hard to endure sometimes? Let’s face it, we live in a sin-cursed world and both in our personal lives and in our society, we see trouble of all kinds. I find myself sometimes just sighing and shaking my head and wondering what’s going to happen next. Can it possibly get worse? Life is just hard for so many people.
But I’m encouraged by what Jesus told his disciples on the night before he died. Things looked pretty bad to them, too, you know. The man they had committed their lives to was not bringing about the political change that they expected. They thought he would overthrow Rome, they would have their country back to themselves, Jesus would be King and of course, they would be his right-hand men. Listen to what Jesus told them, from John 16:16-19: Jesus went on to say, “In a little while you will see me no more, and then after a little while you will see me.” At this, some of his disciples said to one another, “What does he mean by saying, ‘In a little while you will see me no more, and then after a little while you will see me,’ and ‘Because I am going to the Father’?” They kept asking, “What does he mean by ‘a little while’? We don’t understand what he is saying.” Jesus saw that they wanted to ask him about this, so he said to them, “Are you asking one another what I meant when I said, ‘In a little while you will see me no more, and then after a little while you will see me’? Well, they just didn’t get it. They wanted Jesus to move on their timetable, which was NOW, and Jesus was saying “in a little while.” To them, that was not acceptable.
As I thought about this, I realized how much I am like those disciples. I so often just don’t get it! Why are things going from bad to worse? Why are so many people I know going through such deep waters? Why—no doubt the most frequent question that bombards Heaven.
But Jesus said, “In a little while.” To us, “not now” seems like eternity. But God does not measure time as we do, and in the light of eternity, we are living in “a little while,” and it won’t last forever. This phrase—in a little while—has been resonating in my head for days, and it so encourages me.
The Bible often reinforces this idea that we are to bloom where we are planted. When the Apostle Paul said we should learn to be content no matter what our circumstances (Philippians 4:11), he was saying “Bloom where you are planted.” When Jesus said not to worry about tomorrow because tomorrow would take care of itself (Matthew 6:34), he was saying “Bloom where you are planted.” In writing to the Corinthian Christians, Paul said, “Nevertheless, each person should live as a believer in whatever situation the Lord has assigned to them, just as God has called them” (1 Corinthians 7:17). He was admonishing those new believers to bloom where they were planted.
Recently I had an opportunity to talk to a senior citizen, Betty, in her late 80’s, who is blooming where she is planted. Betty is a widow and a mom of three grown children and lots of grandchildren. She is a Jesus-lover from way back, and at this stage in her life, she is finding creative ways to reach out to others with the love of Jesus.
Betty’s husband died after a very long illness where she was his main caregiver. So she spent many years simply taking care of his needs. Now that she lives alone and is still driving, she has found a way to continue to share the love of Jesus with others. She goes to the grocery store every day. She said, “That way I don’t have heavy bags to carry if I just get a few things each day. And then, I just go up and down the aisles of the store, to see who God puts in my path that day.”
Betty uses her daily trips to the grocery store as a way to meet people, to offer encouragement, to pray for people, and to let them know that Jesus loves them. Almost every day she has an opportunity to speak to someone—mostly strangers—and simply offer a moment of caring and concern. She has story after story of the people she has met in this way, and how blessed she is to have this ministry.
Betty didn’t complain about the effects of growing older, or the fact that she was alone now, or the aches and pains that occur as you age. She is just blooming where she is, bringing joy and a ray of hope to many people who just happen to shop for groceries where she does.
What does it mean to “bloom where you are planted”? Let’s just break that down word by word. It begins with the word “bloom” which is a verb—an action word—and it implies that you have to be intentional about this. Blooming means producing something beautiful. So, the first word—bloom—is a directive, something you must do.
For those of us who are Christ-followers, the Bible says we are in the process of being conformed to the image of Jesus Christ. In other words, if you have made that decision to put your trust in Christ and have been born from above through the forgiveness of your sins and the acceptance of his free gift of righteousness, you have the privilege to become more and more like Jesus. To think like him, talk like him, act like him, have his attitudes, his compassion, his love. And this transformation is possible because we have the Spirit of Christ living within us—that’s how we know we have been born from above.
So, we are empowered to bloom because of the Holy Spirit within us, but the truth is, we must cooperate with the Spirit. We must be intentional about “blooming.” Throughout the New Testament, believers are admonished to do their part in this blooming process—in this transformation that should be taking place within us. For instance, Paul wrote to the Ephesians, “I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received” (Ephesians 4:1). And to the Christians in Colossae he said, “So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live your lives in him” (Colossians 2:6).
You and I must be willing to bloom and that means we must nourish our lives with the bread of life, with God’s Word, with fellowship and Bible teaching—all the things that will feed the soil of our souls so that we are able to bloom. Blooms don’t just happen,
If you’re up against a brick wall right now, there are some important principles from 2 Chronicles 20 to give you direction. We’re looking at seven R’s from Jehoshaphat’s prayer. The first was recite who God is, then, remember what he has done, third, recall his promise, then fourth, restate the problem to God.
The fifth R - Release the problem to God.
As soon as Jehoshaphat lays out the problem to the Lord, he releases it to him.
"We do not know what to do, but our eyes are upon you” (2 Chronicles 20:12b).
He admits his total inability to solve the problem. He doesn't pretend to have any answers. But he simply says, "Lord, here it is. It's your problem, not mine."
That's what Jesus meant when he invited us to exchange our heavy burden for his light burden. Just dump them at his feet in recognition of our own inability to do anything about them. That is releasing the problem to God's care. It is evidence that we trust him.
The sixth R - Rejoice in God's salvation.
After his prayer, a prophet rose up and said, "Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God's... Go out to face them tomorrow, and the Lord will be with you" (2 Chronicles 20:13b-17).
That word of encouragement did not come until Jehoshaphat had released the problem to God. When you and I keep holding on, complaining and worrying and trying to fix things ourselves, we hold back God's plan of deliverance. He's waiting to see your act of faith, which must come before the deliverance.
The next day, as they sat out to face this impossible enemy, Jehoshaphat appointed men to sing to the Lord and to praise him for the splendor of his holiness as they went out at the head of the army, saying: "Give thanks to the Lord, for his love endures forever.”
They were praising God for the victory even before it was accomplished. And when they reached the battlefield, all they found were dead bodies lying on the ground; the enemies became confused and killed each other. Jehoshaphat’s army didn't even have to fight. They had to show up; they had to obey God; they had to face the enemy; they had to claim the victory in advance. But once they got there, the fight was over.
(Click here to download the Seven R's reminder card.)
The third R - Recall God's promises.
Notice that next Jehoshaphat recalls God's promises to the children of Israel. He says:
"If calamity comes upon us...we will stand in your presence before this temple that bears your Name and will cry out to you in our distress, and you will hear us and save us" (2 Chronicles 20:9).
The Bible has promises there just for you, did you know that? Have you learned to turn to God's Word and ask for a promise when you face an impossible situation?
I remember when I first started this ministry on one station in the Chicago area in 1984. As it began to grow, I was frightened; I knew how inadequate and inexperienced I was. And I really wanted to back out. But I couldn't deny that God had opened the doors in a miraculous way.
So, I sat down with my Bible and asked God to confirm his calling with a promise. From Isaiah 50 God gave me this promise:
"The Sovereign Lord has given me an instructed tongue, to know the word that sustains the weary. . . Because the Sovereign Lord helps me, I will not be disgraced. Therefore have I set my face like flint, and I know I will not be put to shame" (Isaiah 50: 4a, 7b).
Many times, I've gone back to that promise and it has sustained me and strengthened me time and time again. Do you need a promise from God right now? You’ll find it in his Word.
The fourth R – Re-state the problem to God.
Now, Jehoshaphat restates his problem. He prays:
"But now here are men from Ammon, Moab and Mount Seir, whose territory you would not allow Israel to invade when they came from Egypt; so they turned away from them and did not destroy them. See how they are repaying us by coming to drive us out of the possession you gave us as an inheritance. O our God, will you not judge them? For we have no power to face this vast army that is attacking us" (2 Chronicles 20:10-12a).
The sequence is extremely important. You restate the problem after you have recited who God is, remembered what he has done and recalled his promises to you. Then you're ready to focus on the problem because you're then God-centered instead of self-centered.
(Click here to download the Seven R's reminder card.)
What do you do when you don’t know what to do? In 2 Chronicles 20 where Jehoshaphat, king of Judah, had to fight a vast enemy army and from all outward appearances, his army was going to be soundly defeated.
When Jehoshaphat realized he didn’t know what to do, he called all the people together and prayed for God’s help. From his prayer I want to point out seven R's that I hope you'll remember, because this shows you what to do when you don’t know what to do.
The first R - Recite who God is
Jehoshaphat prayed:
"You are the God who is in heaven. You rule over all the kingdoms of the nations. Power and might are in your hand and no one can withstand you” (2 Chronicles 20:6).
Jehoshaphat's first move was to remind himself and his people of God and his power. And it has to be our first move, too. We must have an in-depth knowledge of the nature of God. That means we must get to know God. Are you able to recite the nature and character of God? Is it firmly established in your heart and mind? When there are no answers, you must begin by reciting who God is.
The second R - Remember God's great works
Jehoshaphat’s prayer continues:
"Did you not drive out the inhabitants of this land before your people Israel and give it forever to the descendants of Abraham your friend?” (2 Chronicles 20:7).
Isn't it amazing how your memory goes on you when you're in a crisis or when you're discouraged? It takes an act of your will to remember what you should remember. But it's important at these times that you purposely remember God's past miracles in your life, his faithfulness to you in days gone by, his deeds of old, as Jehoshaphat did. That's important to remember when you don’t know what to do.
(Click here to download the Seven R's reminder card.)
Quiero mostrarte de la Palabra de Dios qué hacer cuando no sabes qué hacer. Todos tenemos esos momentos en nuestras vidas cuando estamos contra esa pared de ladrillos y no tenemos idea de cómo lidiar con eso. Bueno, esos son los momentos en que necesitamos saber qué hacer, ¡cuando no sabemos qué hacer!
¿Recuerdas la historia que se encuentra en 2 Crónicas 20, donde Josafat se enfrentaba a una guerra con un grupo de enemigos que sin duda podrían borrarlo del mapa? Era un rey piadoso de Judá, y cuando se dio cuenta de que este vasto ejército marchaba hacia él, se alarmó, ¡se atemorizó, se preocupó! ¿Quién no lo estaría? Pero tan pronto como vio su situación, "resolvió consultar al Señor y proclamó ayuno para todo Judá".
Observa cómo respondió a una crisis: resolvió consultar al Señor. ¿Qué es lo primero que haces cuando te enfrentas a un enemigo abrumador de algún tipo? Podría ser un enemigo de las relaciones o un enemigo financiero o un enemigo del desempleo o un enemigo de la salud; vienen en todos los tipos y tamaños. Lo más probable es que tu primera reacción emocional sea alarmarte; eso es de esperarse. Pero, ¿qué te hace hacer esa alarma?
A menudo, lo primero que hago es planificar mi pelea. Cualquiera que sea el problema, empiezo a pensar cómo puedo ganar esta batalla. Puedo hacer esto o aquello; Puedo hablar con esta persona o con aquella; Puedo tirar de esta cuerda o de otra. ¡Seguramente hay algo que puedo hacer para arreglar esta situación y arreglarla rápido! Así que empiezo a elaborar mi plan de batalla.
Josafat sabía más. Recordó primero "consultar al Señor". ¿Cuál es tu misión imposible hoy, tu persona imposible, tu montaña demasiado alta para escalar? ¿Ya le has pedido al Señor que te guíe? ¿O estás luchando, trabajando y angustiándote para idear tu propio plan de batalla para poder resolver ese problema?
Simplemente detente donde estás y consulta al Señor. Eso significa decirle que confías en él, que crees que es más inteligente que tú y que admites que tus ideas generalmente empeoran las cosas en lugar de resolverlas. Entonces, en lugar de pelear tu batalla, vas a preguntarle al Señor qué hacer. Ese es el primer paso importante.
I want to show you from God’s Word what to do when you don’t know what to do. We all have those times in our lives when we’re up against that brick wall and we have no idea how to deal with it. Well, those are the times we need to know what to do, when we don’t know what to do!
Do you recall the story found in 2 Chronicles 20, where Jehoshaphat was facing war with a bunch of enemies who could undoubtedly wipe him off the map? He was a godly king of Judah, and when he realized this vast army was marching his way, he was alarmed—frightened, worried! Who wouldn't be? But as soon as he saw his predicament, he "resolved to inquire of the Lord and he proclaimed a fast for all Judah.”
Notice how he responded to a crisis—he resolved to inquire of the Lord. What is the first thing you do when facing an overwhelming enemy of some sort? It could be a relationship enemy or a financial enemy or a jobless enemy or a health enemy; they come in all types and sizes. Your first emotional reaction most likely is alarm; that's to be expected. But what does that alarm cause you to do?
Often the first thing I do is to plan my fight. Whatever the problem is, I start figuring how I can win this battle. I can do this or that; I can talk to this person or that one; I can pull this string or another one. Surely there is something I can do to fix this situation and fix it fast! So I start drawing up my battle plan.
Jehoshaphat knew better. He remembered to first "inquire of the Lord.” What is your mission impossible today, your impossible person, your mountain too high to climb? Have you inquired of the Lord yet for his guidance? Or are you struggling and working and fretting to come up with your own battle plan so you can solve that problem?
Just stop right where you are and inquire of the Lord. That means to tell him that you trust him, you believe he is smarter than you are, and you admit that your ideas usually make matters worse rather than solve anything. So, instead of fighting your battle, you're going to inquire of the Lord as to what to do. That's the first important step.
(Click here to download the Seven R's reminder card.)
We need a vision of what God wants to do through us, and that vision should be the motivation that helps us break out of our boxes and accomplish our dreams. But the first question we need to confront is whether or not our vision, our passion, is from God or not.
Is It of God?
Here are seven signs that I believe will help you answer that question:
Sign Number 1 – It won’t go away.
If God has a plan that will take you out of your comfort zone—out of some box you’re in—it will not go away. And as you pray about it (and that must be step number one!), it will get stronger not weaker.
Believe me, I’ve had lots of other “passions” and ideas that I thought at first were something God wanted me to pursue, but it didn’t take long for those things to fade. If you have to keep pushing the doors open and there is resistance on every hand, most of the time it’s because God is saying either “No, not that” or “No, not now.”
Of course, we have to be persistent and not give up at the first obstacle, but if it’s of God, it won’t go away in your heart. Instead, it will grow and even though it looks impossible, you just won’t be able to get away from it.
Sign Number 2 – Your motivation will be to serve God and others.
God doesn’t give us passions or visions just to make us feel good about ourselves or help us achieve our personal goals. If it’s from God you will be motivated out of a love for God and for people, and it will be all about serving.
Remember what Jesus told us in Mark 9:35: “He said, ‘Anyone who wants to be first must be the very last, and the servant of all.’” God’s vision for your life will lead you to become a servant, in one way or another. Are you ready for that?
Sign Number 3 – There will be a need for it.
God is not inefficient and he does things “in a fitting and orderly way” (1 Corinthians 14:40). If God is leading you out of your box, it’s because someone needs you out of that box, doing what God has for you to do. It won’t be a whimsical flight of your imagination. It won’t be because you just want to do something creative or different. It will be to meet a need.
Sign Number 4 – God will open doors for you and confirm it through his Word.
If this vision is a God-thing, you won’t have to push and shove and beg and plead. You will have to be persistent, but God will open some doors for you and confirm that this is of him. You will see some small and/or large miracles as God opens these doors. You will be amazed, frightened, awestruck, and excited.
I remember when I began to see that my radio ministry was not just for one station in Chicago. I had been mentored and encouraged to enlarge my vision and take the program to other Christian stations. I don’t frighten easily, but as I began to think about growing this radio ministry, I was scared. This was way bigger than anything I had ever thought it would be and I would need resources that I didn’t have. So I said, “Lord, I need confirmation from your Word that this is of you, or I’m not going to do it. Give me clear guidance, please.”
My reading that day was in Isaiah 50. Verses four and seven simply hit me between the eyes that day:
“The Sovereign Lord has given me a well-instructed tongue to know the Word that sustains the weary….Because the Sovereign Lord helps me I will not be disgraced. Therefore have I set my face like flint and I know I will not be put to shame.”
There was no doubt in my mind that these two verses were God’s voice to me, his promise to me, and his green light to enlarge my ministry. I can’t tell you how many times in the past years I’ve gone back to that passage. When you get out of your comfortable box and start pursuing the passion God has given you, you need a promise from his Word to hang on to. Ask God for it.
Sign Number 5 – Your spiritual leader(s) will counsel and/or encourage you.
All of us need and should have those people in our lives who are our spiritual leaders,
¿Qué quieres ser cuando seas grande? Esa es una pregunta familiar que se le hace a la mayoría de los niños pequeños en varias etapas y edades, y escucharás respuestas como un médico, bombero, maestro, astronauta, ¡lo que sea! Pero, ¿cuántos de nosotros estamos ahora haciendo lo que dijimos que queríamos ser cuando fuéramos grandes? Los niños pueden soñar grandes sueños; aún no han adquirido el mal hábito de ponerse en cajas.
Puede ser que nunca hayas alcanzado tu potencial y hecho las cosas buenas que Dios ha planeado que hagas porque permitiste que alguien o algo te convenciera de que no puedes hacerlo o que no eres el indicado para hacerlo. Tal vez sea hora de tener el coraje de volverse como un niño, como dijo Jesús que debemos hacer, y soñar algunos sueños y abrazar algunas visiones de lo que Dios quiere que hagas.
Cuando yo era una joven profesional, el mundo apenas comenzaba a abrirse a las mujeres para que siguieran cualquier carrera o trabajo para el que estuvieran calificadas. Las puertas ya no estaban cerradas para nosotras; se volvió ilegal prohibir a una mujer un trabajo, solo por fuera mujer. Tuve opciones que no estaban disponibles para las mujeres en generaciones anteriores.
Las cajas en las que nos habían guardado durante años se limitaban bastante a:
Ser esposa y madre Profesora secretaria enfermera
Obviamente, hubo algunas mujeres que salieron de estas cajas en ese entonces, pero definitivamente eran una minoría. Tenías que encajar en una de esas cajas o no se te consideraba tan femenina como deberías ser, solo un poco rara.
Hoy sería difícil encontrar un trabajo u ocupación en la que las mujeres no participen y, en la mayoría de los casos, prosperen. ¡Mi primer trabajo en ventas había estado cerrado para las mujeres anteriormente con el pretexto de que las mujeres no podían cargar el pesado equipo! Bueno, no solo podríamos hacer eso, sino que podríamos llevar grandes cuotas de ventas y sobresalir en esa posición. Las mujeres no solo tuvimos el beneficio de esas nuevas carreras, sino que las empresas que nos contrataron se beneficiaron mucho de tenernos a bordo.
Pero todavía tenemos cajas hoy, cajas de nuestra propia imaginación; cajas que hemos construido para nosotros mismos o nos hemos metido en alguna caja que alguien más construyó para nosotros.
Pregúntate en qué caja o cajas te has metido. Estas son algunas de las más comunes:
Soy demasiado viejo para hacer eso, o demasiado joven. No tengo la educación adecuada. No tengo la experiencia adecuada. No tengo suficiente dinero. No tengo tiempo. No soy bueno con la gente. Soy demasiado tímido para hacer eso. Nunca podré aprenderlo. No tengo el aspecto adecuado. ¡Soy demasiado grande o demasiado pequeño! Ese no es mi don.
Esta lista es virtualmente interminable. Tu puedes estar en tu propia caja única. Piénsalo: ¿qué te has estado diciendo a tí mismo que no puedes hacer por alguna razón? ¡Es hora de superarlo!
Efesios 2:10 dice: “Pues somos la obra maestra de Dios. Él nos creó de nuevo en Cristo Jesús, a fin de que hagamos las cosas buenas que preparó para nosotros tiempo atrás.”. ¿Podrías estar perdiéndote de las buenas obras que Dios preparó para ti porque permitiste que otros te pusieran en una caja, o más probablemente, te pusiste a ti mismo en algunas cajas y simplemente no puedes creer que Dios te quiere fuera de eso y te equipará para hacer lo que él pretendía que hicieras desde el principio de los tiempos?.
Proverbios 29:18 dice: “Donde no hay visión el pueblo se desenfrena”. La visión nos da esperanza y propósito y la capacidad de perseverar y resistir. Si nunca tuviste una visión de lo que podrías hacer, si nunca aspiraste a algo tan grande que te asustó, entonces puedes estar pereciendo en la vid. En la parábola de los talentos, Jesús nos enseñó el principio de que, si no usamos lo que él nos da, ¡no solo no nos dará más,
(as presented by Lisa Bishop)
When is a time where you felt fear and didn’t let it stop you? A time you chose to obey and trust God despite being afraid? Trusting God is an act of courage.
In Daniel 6 we see a well-known story of trust and courage: the story of Daniel in the Lion’s den. To refresh our memories, Darius, King of Babylon was appointing men to high positions of leadership in the kingdom. Daniel, known as the servant of the living God, was one of the appointed leaders and had so distinguished himself as a man with an extraordinary spirit that the king decided to put him in charge of the whole kingdom. The other men were jealous and did anything they could to discredit Daniel. “But, they could find no charge for corruption, for Daniel was trustworthy, and no negligence of corruption was found in him.”
So the men set a trap for Daniel, knowing that he was a man of God, and got the king to issue a decree that anyone worshiping any god or man besides the king would be put to death. This is where Daniel’s stellar track record of courage and faithfulness to God is displayed. Despite the decree forbidding worship and the threat of death, Daniel still was unwavering in his faith. He got down on his knees three times a day, prayed and gave thanks to God. In the face of fear for his life, Daniel, had courage to be obedient and faithful in worship and prayer. And his allegiance to God and not man landed him face to face with death in the den of lions. After being holed up in a den of not so friendly felines for a night, the king opens the door to the den the next morning only to find Daniel unharmed. We read that Daniel was taken out of the den uninjured for he trusted God.
It takes faith to trust God. It takes obedience to trust God. It takes courage to trust him especially in the face of uncertainty. And while our physical lives may not be threatened like Daniel’s and so many of our Christian brothers and sisters across the world, there may be times where we will be ridiculed, mocked, canceled or shunned for our faith in Jesus. It can be tempting to be a covert Christian, especially at our workplace, for fear of what people might think. Yet will we still remain true to God? There are people he has put in your path that need the love and hope of Jesus.
Instead of bowing down to a culture which is anti-God, will you be courageous to live set apart? To be seen as one trustworthy, with an extraordinary spirit, being faithful in prayer and diligent in worship as you love and follow Jesus?
What is one way you can be courageous in trusting God?
(Click here to download the entire message for this week.)
(as presented by Lisa Bishop)
Setting yourself apart from the crowd is an act of courage.
Not too long ago I worked with a woman who loved to gossip. Even in casual catch-up conversations you could just tell she was itching to share some story from the workplace tabloids. I would ask her how she is doing, or, what’s new, and she would give me that look. The one where she was about to tell me something she knew she shouldn’t. You know the look. Maybe you have even given it at some point.
When a co-worker or friend is trying to suck you down a rabbit hole of dishing about another person, it takes courage to set yourself apart and not indulge. We get tempted with juicy information and it can be alluring to jump on the gossip bandwagon but resist the urge. Gossip kills cultures. Gossip undermines trust.
The thing about gossip is this: if a person is sharing information about someone that is not theirs to share, you can be certain they will turn around and do the same thing to you. And you undermine your integrity if you are the one with loose lips.
Be trustworthy. Have integrity. Set yourself apart. Don’t gossip. Gossip is after all a false sense of connection. You might think you have a close friendship with someone but is it anchored in talking about other people? If so, it is a friendship built on sinking sand.
Other ways we can set ourselves apart at work are by being honest and not telling lies or bending the truth. By avoiding talking poorly about your boss and engaging in that meeting after the meeting conversation where you tear him or her down.
Set yourself apart by refraining from boasting or taking credit for something. Instead, give someone else on your team the shout out due them, lift them up and let them shine.
First John 2:15 instructs us, “Do not love the world or the things in the world.“ Not loving the world means we do not reflect the world’s ways. And, it takes courage to go against the grain.
As a follower of Jesus, you already have been set apart. Might people look at you weird or not include you because you don’t play by their rules? Maybe. But remain humble and gracious. There will be people who see you living differently. And when they ask you why, you have an opening for a spiritual conversation. You can share how your faith in Jesus causes you to live and love like him.
(as presented by Lisa Bishop)
What is your relationship with conflict? Do you love a good conflict or do you run from it and try to avoid it? Addressing conflict is another act of courage.
Conflict. Just the word can make the hair go up on the back of your neck, your body tense, your heart race, or send that warm nervous sensation throughout your body. I think we have all seen or experienced all too often times where conflict has gone wrong, and we don’t know how to properly lean into hard situations so we try to avoid them, or so we think. The truth is, we can really never avoid conflict. Avoidance does not make a difficult situation go away.
Just the other day I needed to address a concern with a coworker. She had dropped the ball on something and it reflected poorly on our team. It took courage to initiate the conversation rather than just stew on it or tell others about my frustration.
Instead of going in with guns blazing or with an accusatory or critical spirit, I approached the situation with kindness, humility, and curiosity. I told her what I observed and how that impacted the team. She graciously owned her mistake and then we talked about how to mitigate the same mistake moving forward. I then asked her how I could be of help and support her. I wanted her to know that I was for her. She actually ended up thanking me for the conversation. Now I realize that not everyone will react the way my co-worker did; some will act defensively. But I am, you are, ultimately, responsible for how you approach and respond in situations. We cannot be responsible for other’s responses.
When we approach conflict with biblical wisdom and a Christ-like attitude of heart, leaning into a tough situation can actually be an opportunity to strengthen and deepen relationships.
Proverbs 3:3 says “Do not let kindness and truth leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart. So you will find favor and good repute in the sight of God and man.” Both kindness and truth are important. Proverbs 15:1 says “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” A gentle answer, a kind approach, is one that shows respect and comes from a humble heart.
Speak gently instead of coming out with a critical spirit and biting word. Keep your voice calm, your words sweet, and your attitude humble. Get your heart right before the Lord and ask him to give you courage and a kind spirit in conflict.
(as presented by Lisa Bishop)
Another act of courage is letting go of an offense. Choosing to forgive when you have been hurt.
Think of the last time someone said or did something that hurt or offended you. Just a few days ago a close friend of mine sent an email that had my heart racing and my blood boiling. I felt the email was hurtful and insensitive. If I am honest, I ruminated on and rehearsed the offense which only led to greater dis-ease in my body and not so kind and loving thoughts flowing through my mind. As I got a grip on my emotions and brought them to the Lord, he graciously helped me calm down and bring my hurt and concerns to him.
At first he showed me how in the past I have done the very same thing that my friend did to me. There have been times when I have said things that, while not intended to cause hurt, have certainly been hurtful and offensive to others. There have been emails I have sent that had a not so gracious and loving tone to them. It was the ole “look at the log in your eye first Lisa!” Now this is not to discount that I felt hurt, but rather than continuing to brew on the offense, I took it to God.
Has a co-worker said or done something that offended you? Is there a friendship that has become distant because of a relational hurt? It takes courage to extend forgiveness. It takes moral strength to obey God’s instructions when it comes to letting go of an offense. And God’s Word has a lot to say about forgiveness:
“Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you” (Ephesians 4:32).
“Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you” (Colossians 3:13).
“And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice, forgiving one another, just as in Christ God forgave you” (Ephesians 4:30).
“Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?" Jesus answered, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times” (Matthew 18:21-22).
Now that is a tall order but with God, it is possible. Bring the offense to God and ask him to give you courage to overlook it.
(as presented by Lisa Bishop)
What comes to mind when you think about courage? You have probably heard it said that courage is not the absence of fear but feeling fear and choosing to act. I will be reviewing five acts of courage, and the first act of courage is taking responsibility. Admitting when you are wrong.
Have you ever found yourself in a situation where something went awry? A conversation turns into conflict, a misstep turns into a mess, a project at work takes a turn for the worst…. And if you are honest, it was your fault but you didn’t want to take the fall for your poor choices so you placed the blame on someone else?
Eve and Adam did that in the garden of Eden. In Genesis God had given them access to every tree in the garden pleasing in appearance and good for food except for the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. One tree was off limits when the rest of the garden was free reign. The serpent tempted Eve and at that moment of temptation she started doubting the goodness of God. She eats off the forbidden tree and Adam who was with her follows suit. What happens next is blame. When God calls out to them and questions their actions, we see that Adam’s response is, “The woman you gave to be with me, she gave me some fruit from the tree so I ate.” Then God asks Eve what she has done and she follows along with the game of blame and says, “It was the serpent, he deceived me, and I ate.” (Genesis 3:10-13)
The blame game. It started in the garden and has a grip on us to this day. I wonder what would have happened if Eve would have taken responsibility for her actions rather than pinning it on the serpent? If Adam would have owned up to his error, how could that have positively impacted his relationship with Eve, with God? We see blame happening all around us. We are a culture of blame. We lack the guts to admit we are wrong. We more easily point the finger and make it someone else’s fault. Admitting we are wrong takes humility. It takes risk. It takes integrity. It takes courage.
If you want to live a life set apart, admit when you are wrong. Take ownership. Admit how you played a part in a breakdown, miscommunication or mishap.
Is there a situation or relationship that is out of sorts in your life? Maybe your part in the breakdown is obvious. Maybe it’s not. Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal to you the part you played. Then be courageous. Have a conversation with the people your choices impacted. Admit your mistake to your co-worker or boss. Take responsibility for your choices and actions that led to a friendship or relationship breakdown.
Choose courage over blame.
What do you want to be when you grow up? That’s a familiar question that most young children are asked at various stages and ages, and you’ll hear answers like a doctor, a fireman, a teacher, an astronaut—whatever! But how many of us are now doing what we said we wanted to do when we grew up? Children are able to dream big dreams; they haven’t yet formed the bad habit of putting themselves in boxes.
It may be that you have never reached your potential and done the good things God has planned for you to do because you’ve allowed someone or something to convince you that it can’t be done or you’re not the one to do it. Maybe it’s time to have the courage to become like a child, as Jesus said we should, and dream some dreams and embrace some visions of what God wants you to do.
When I was a young career woman, the world was just beginning to open to women to pursue any career or job for which they were qualified. No longer were doors closed to us; it became illegal to prohibit a woman from a job just because she was a woman. I had choices that were not available to women in former generations.
The boxes that we had been kept in for years were pretty much limited to:
Wife and Mother Teacher Secretary Nurse
Obviously, there were some women who broke out of these boxes back then, but they were definitely a minority. You had to fit into one of those boxes or you were considered just not quite as feminine as you should be, just a little weird.
Today you would be hard pressed to find any job or occupation where women are not involved and in most cases flourishing. My first job in sales had been closed to women previously under the pretense that women could not carry the heavy equipment! Well, not only could we do that, we could carry heavy sales quotas and excel in that position. Not only did we women then have the benefit of those new careers, but the companies that hired us profited very nicely from having us on board.
But we still have boxes today—boxes of our own imagination; boxes that we have built for ourselves or we’ve crawled into some box that someone else built for us.
Ask yourself what box or boxes you have put yourself in. Here are some common ones:
I’m too old to do that—or too young. I don’t have the right education. I don’t have the right experience. I don’t have enough money. I don’t have time. I’m not good with people. I’m too shy to do that. I’ll never be able to learn it. I don’t have the right looks. I’m too big—or I’m too small! That’s not my gift.
This list is virtually endless. You may be in your own unique box. Think about it: what have you been telling yourself you cannot do for some reason? It’s time to get over it!
Ephesians 2:10 says: “For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” Could you be missing out on the good works God prepared for you to do because you’ve allowed others to put you in a box, or more likely, you’ve put yourself in some boxes, and you just can’t believe that God wants you out of the box and will equip you to do what he intended from the beginning of time for you to do.
Proverbs 29:18 (KJV) says: “Where there is no vision, the people perish.” Vision gives us hope and purpose and the ability to persevere and endure. If you’ve never had a vision of what you could do, if you’ve never aspired to something so big that it scared you, then you may be perishing on the vine. In the parable of the talents Jesus taught us the principle that if we don’t use what he gives us, not only will he not give us more, we will lose what we have! (See Matthew 25:14-30.) Without a vision we begin to shrivel up and settle for mediocrity. That inward deterioration occurs subtly and could go unnoticed, even by yourself, but eventually it catches up with you when you begin to see your life as hum-drum or boring or meaningless.
I want to encourage you to let go of your past. I know—it’s not easy to do that. But like everything else in the Christian journey, it’s something you learn to do by faith, not necessarily by feelings. The passage in Scripture which speaks to this so clearly is from Philippians 3:13-14, where the Apostle Paul writes: “Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” Paul says that he’s not all the way there—he doesn’t have everything figured out. But he knows that in order to go forward, he has to forget what is behind. That doesn’t mean you can literally erase your memory, but rather that you refuse to re-live the past, to dwell in the past. It’s gone and there’s nothing you can do to change it.
You must stop telling yourself that you are a victim or you aren’t qualified or you’ve messed up so much that there’s no hope. You can’t undo the past, but you can make today and all your tomorrows promising and good through the power of Jesus Christ.
There’s a prize ahead for you, if you are a follower of Jesus Christ. There’s a reason to be hopeful and joyful because of Jesus who has called you to be in heaven with him. Dwelling on your past keeps you mired in hopelessness, self-pity, anger, or depression. God has good days ahead for you. Can you, by faith and through his power, let go of your past? Just pray right now that God will make that a reality in your life and keep praying it as often as you need to. You’ll discover that what you can’t do on your own—let go of your past—God can do for you.
(Click here to download the entire message for this week.)
Learning to let go is a gift you can give yourself, a very valuable gift.
I’m often amazed at how people get so bent-out-of-shape over the small stuff. You know—like yelling at an airline employee because a flight is late, screaming at the driver in front who stopped on a green light, fussing at your kids or mate because they left socks on the floor, losing sleep because your next-door neighbor’s dog irritates you. Small stuff. And then I have to recognize that I let small stuff upset my days far too often as well.
Years ago I began to see that this was a problem for me. I was really bad at letting the small stuff ruin my days. So, I started praying about it, for one thing; and then I learned a simple technique which has served me well. When I’m starting to get upset, I ask myself, “What difference will this make in twenty-four hours?” And I’ve set a rule for myself that if it won’t matter this time tomorrow, I simply am not allowed to spend any energy on it. I can’t get angry; I can’t get frustrated; I can’t get my feelings hurt; I can’t complain about it—because it won’t make one bit of difference this time tomorrow.
I highly recommend that you learn to ask yourself this simple question—what difference will this make in twenty-four hours—because I can testify that it is life-changing. You will learn to let go of the small stuff, and you’ll discover that probably about 90 percent of what is bugging you today is small stuff that won’t matter in twenty-four hours. Just think of how much stress this will take out of your life.
Jesus said, “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own” (Matthew 6:34).
Is there someone in your life right now that has done you wrong? Someone who deserves to be punished and suffer for the wrong they’ve done you? Are you willing to let go of your right for revenge?
This is one area where lots of us find it very difficult to let go. If you’ve been truly hurt by someone—especially someone who has never apologized or tried to make it right or even acknowledged that they hurt you—no doubt your natural reaction is to get back at them. How can they get off scot free while you are left hurting, even devastated? It just eats at your sense of fair play—it’s just not fair. So, how in the world can you let go of this deep desire to see them punished for what they’ve done to you?
I’ve met people who have become so fixated on the hurt done to them, so determined that the other person suffer, that they have become obsessed with revenge. It’s understandable how a person could get to this place. Your mind dwells on the injustice, and the more you think about it, the more you cannot let go of the anger. Then that anger turns into bitterness and you inflict even more pain and hurt on yourself.
The Bible says that vengeance belongs to the Lord and he will repay. If you’re hanging on to a desire for revenge, this is one truth you need to learn and accept. God is the avenger; he knows who deserves punishment; he knows about wrongs that have never been set right. And unless a person repents and truly forsakes their ways, God is going to have the last word. Those wrongs will not always go unavenged.
So, if you can let go of your desire to get your pound of flesh; if you can take them off your hook and put them on God’s hook, you will free yourself from the terrible pain of that hurt. The more you refuse to let go, the more you increase the pain. And the more you suffer for it.
One of the best gifts you can ever give yourself is to let go of your right for revenge. Trust the God who sees and knows all, and who will someday settle every score—his way.
Have you ever heard of the gift of letting go? Well, this gift of letting go isn’t found in the Bible per se, but certainly the Bible is full of admonitions to let go. I want to talk about letting go of the controls of your life—and this applies to all of us control-freaks!
Proverbs 3:5-6 makes it very clear that we are to turn over the controls to the Lord: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”
And again in Isaiah 48:17: “This is what the Lord says— your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: ‘I am the Lord your God, who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go.’”
It’s easy to quote these verses, but when it comes to giving up your plans and asking God to direct you in the way you should go, well, that’s not quite so easy, is it? Maybe you do what I’ve often done—you come up with your plans and then you ask God to bless them. Lord, here is what I want to do; it’s a really good plan; I’ve thought it through very carefully and I’m sure you agree that this is the way I should go. So, please bless my plans. Are you guilty of that kind of control tendency, as I often am?
When will we learn that God’s ways are best? As we just read from Isaiah, God teaches us what is best for us. He’s not trying to make your way hard; he’s not trying to steal your joy. He simply knows what is best for you. He is far better at controlling your life than you are! So, please give him the blank piece of paper and ask him to write the plan.
And here’s the thing: this gift of letting go of the controls of your life and giving God permission to run your show is not a once and for all thing. It’s pretty much a daily attitude, an on-going commitment, an intentional decision you will have to make on a regular basis. Your days need to begin with relinquishing the controls of your life to God for that day, admitting your inadequacy to control your own lives, and once again acknowledging that you belong to God and he is in control.
I urge you to let go of the controls of your life—give them over to God. And then do it again tomorrow and tomorrow—and all the tomorrows of your life. You’ll never regret it.
A friend once said to me that she was learning about the gift of letting go, and I immediately related to what she was saying. There are several gifts of the Spirit listed in Scripture, but you won’t find the “gift of letting go” there. So, it’s not a gift that some people have and others don’t. Rather it is a gift we give ourselves, and we are the only ones who can do that—and everyone desperately needs this gift.
I began to make a list of what we often need to let go of, and I was thinking that maybe this list would be helpful to you as well.
Letting Go of Our Dreams
We all need goals and visions and missions that we aspire to and work toward. So, I’m not talking about letting go of God-given dreams and ambitions. I’m talking about letting go of your daydreams, for one thing. If you’re not careful, you can find yourself living in a world of daydreams. I think this is often a result of missing pieces in our lives, and we start to build a fictional world in our minds around that missing piece.
For example, if you want to be married and that piece is missing in your life right now, you can start daydreaming about how wonderful married life would be. Even if there is no potential mate in sight, you can imagine the perfect mate who would fulfill all your dreams and make that make-believe world a reality. That may seem harmless—and small amounts of very occasional daydreaming are—but when it becomes mind-consuming, you are setting yourself up for discouragement, depression, disappointment and disillusionment. And another thing—living in that make-believe world consumes time and energy and keeps you from productive activities.
Then sometimes you need to let go of a life-long dream and trust God for your future. If you’re dealing with a broken dream—one that seemed like a dream-come-true but instead has turned into a nightmare—you may be at that point where you need to let it go. Believe me, I know that seems like mission impossible, but it’s not as hard as you think it will be, and if it’s time to let go, God will reward you with a peace that will amaze you. I’ve been there, and I remember when I finally let go of my broken dream, peace swept over me like I never imagined and I realized how much of my pain was self-inflicted.
(Presented By Lisa Bishop)
When it comes to your thoughts, which ones do you find yourself dwelling on? What fears, failings, unproductive patterns of thinking get recycled in your mind? What words do you find yourself regularly rehearsing that lead to worry, anxiety, perhaps even anger or self-defeat?
It has been said that our thoughts determine our life. Where our thoughts go, our lives will follow. What we believe determines how we live.
A really important part of our faith as followers of Jesus is our thought life and being mindful of what we meditate on.
If you were to take an inventory of your thoughts over the last 24 hours, what were some that were on repeat? Were they life giving and encouraging thoughts or did they lead you to be anxious, worried, or drive you into a pit of despair? Are your predominant thoughts lovely or life sucking? Are they worthy of praise or do they cause a panic?
“I will never amount to anything.” “I am a failure.” “I don’t have what it takes.” “God doesn’t really care about me.” “I am not lovable.” “I will always be alone.” “I will never measure up.” “I will never get out of debt.” “I will always be stuck in this addiction.” “My life will never change.”
Hopefully I didn’t just depress you with that list but if we are honest, how often do our thoughts sound strikingly similar?
The power of our thoughts shapes us. What we choose to focus, dwell and ruminate on influences our lives and affects our peace. Notice I said the word choose. Oftentimes we take the position of being a casual bystander of our thoughts, we leave our thoughts unchecked and let them consume us and ultimately rule us. We can get captured by our thoughts rather than holding our thoughts captive to Christ.
Second Corinthians 10:5 gives us instruction when it comes to our thinking: “We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.”
What Paul is referencing are ungodly philosophies, untrue thoughts about God and false religions. But Paul’s principle has a much broader application. We have the ability to boss our thoughts around. We are not helpless victims or recipients of our thoughts. We can choose to interrupt our thoughts and bring every one of them into captivity to the obedience of Christ—thoughts of lust, thoughts of anger, thoughts of fear, thoughts of greed, bitter thoughts, worrisome thoughts, angry thoughts, thoughts of envy and comparison.
Holding our thoughts captive is a very active and intentional action and process. And when Paul is telling us to hold our thoughts captive that word in the Greek means to lead away, to bring under control. As followers of Jesus we are instructed to bring our thoughts in alignment with truth, with God’s thoughts. Notice Paul says every thought. That encompasses thoughts about God, ourselves, our circumstances, and others, our future and our past.
So what do we do when we recognize that our mind has wandered and started to entertain thinking that is not in line with what God thinks? We reign our thoughts in! It reminds me of a time my girlfriends and I spent a week at a ranch in Colorado. One day when we were trail riding we came across a wide opening in the field where the ranchers were wrangling cattle. It reminded me of those old western movies where they would swing the lassos above their heads and cast it out to capture a runaway cow. That is what we want to do with our thoughts. Picture your thoughts like a cow. When you sense one running rampant, lasso it in! Bring it into the fold of God’s thinking.
And in order to think like God you must be in the Word of God. I love the reminder in Psalm 1, blessed is the one “who meditates on his law day and night, That person is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither (Psalm 1: 2b-3) Do you see the promise in those verse...
There are some unusual examples of women in Scripture who broke the molds of their day, were mightily blessed, and used by God, and fulfilled God's purpose in their lives by breaking out of traditional roles.
This is a topic we struggle with in many Christian circles today, and you'll find a different viewpoint for almost every person you talk with. As a woman who has personally struggled with the boxes others have built for me, I've really tried to get a biblical perspective. Admittedly, that's not easy to do, because all of us face these questions with our personal biases and mindsets.
But I've concluded that God, in his infinite creativity, has cast some women into positions and roles that are different, just as he has done with some men. For years as a young woman I felt that God must have made a mistake to give me the kind of personality and qualities that I possess. From my experience in Christian circles, it seemed that I would have been better off with a different personality, one less assertive, without leadership tendencies; that quiet and meek spirit which Peter talks about and I interpreted as meaning you kept your mouth shut at all times.
Without expressing it, I simply felt like a square peg in a round hole very often. I felt I had to suppress the natural tendencies I had and constantly try to be like other women who seemed to fit better into the expectations of what a Christian woman should be. That was a mistaken understanding on my part.
I now realize that God knew exactly what he was doing when he made me the way I am, and if it doesn't fit some man-made boxes, that simply is not my concern. My mind is to be set on following Jesus, without any thought about whether that takes me in traditional or non-traditional paths. He has called me to be a disciple, I am responsible for fulfilling the great commission in my own life, and I must faithfully focus on what God wants me to do. The Bible gives me guidelines, but I am not bound to the traditions and biases of others.
Neither am I called to be a troublemaker; to prove that women are qualified; to change the mind of those who disagree. That is God's business, not mine.
If you find yourself struggling with your non-traditional role, I want to encourage you to make sure your motivation and your commitment are single-focused on Jesus, and then follow him, wherever that takes you. God will continue to call some women to be mold-breakers, as he has throughout the history of the Church.
As long as we keep our eyes fixed on following Jesus, wherever it leads, we're free from the boxes and expectations of others; free to be a slave of Jesus Christ.
(Click here to download the message for the entire week.)
There is a woman in the Old Testament whose leadership and accomplishments would be outstanding today. In her day they had to be incredible.
Deborah was one of the judges of Israel, the top authority in the country at that time. She had men working for her; she even led the army into a battle and won it. That certainly was not a customary role for women in her time.
She must have felt like a fifth wheel at times. She was different from all the other women in her day! It must have been a lonely spot. Undoubtedly there were times when she grew weary of the responsibilities and pressures on her. But she was a woman of great faith in God, and her dedication to her calling was unwavering, whatever personal desires she may have had to forego.
We know that she was married; we don't know if she had any children. But this was a woman in a traditional role yet called by God to a job that was very untraditional. She had a position of higher authority than her husband—than any other man in the country.
Why do you think Deborah accepted the job of judge? I don't think she was trying to prove anything. There was no election campaign, where she stumped the trail proclaiming that women had a right to be a judge. Her career ambition was not to be the first woman judge in Israel. That was never an issue with Deborah. Deborah was a judge because God called her to be one.
Why do you think God asked Deborah to be a judge for those many years? Because he had gifted her for the job and that was his plan for her. Why would he ask her to do something so different from a traditional woman's role? Because God is sovereign, and he uses many different kinds of people in different situations as he sees fit.
God still calls some women to break old molds and do things not often done by women. He has a right to do so now, just as he did with Deborah. But the women God calls are not marching for women's rights. They are marching in the Lord's army, followers of Jesus Christ, committed to his service, regardless of the role they are asked to fill.
If God has called you to be a mold-breaker, count it a privilege. Keep in mind, I'm not talking about departing from biblical principles or standards, but rather about man-made traditions and roles. Sometimes God uses mold-breakers in very effective ways.
We see in Luke 8 that Mary Magdalene, Joanna, Susanna and many other women broke the molds of their day in order to follow Jesus Christ, support him and testify to his power in their lives.
Yes, these women pushed the limits, they exceeded the boundaries, they ignored tradition. Undoubtedly they must have gotten lots of funny looks and perhaps some strong lectures from other people who thought they had overstepped their boundaries as they traveled all over following Jesus and supporting his ministry. But I don't think they cared what people thought.
You see, they were breaking the mold but not for the sake of saying they had broken the mold. They weren't trying to blaze new paths for women, nor were they rebelling against unfair treatment.
They were women who were driven but not by a desire to show people what women could do. They were driven by a fierce love and commitment to the Man who had changed their lives—the Messiah who had come to deliver them from their bondage. And they just couldn't let traditional molds keep them from sharing that truth.
I believe this example left to us by these most unusual women gives us a guideline to follow as women in today's world. Can we—should we—be mold-breakers? The guiding principle is that when a tradition or a mold inhibits our ability to share Jesus Christ, to follow him in new and effective ways, then breaking the mold is the right thing to do.
Now, understand that I'm not talking about breaking scriptural principles, but I am talking about the boxes that people sometimes would put us into because we're women, the limitations we place on ourselves because of traditional female roles.
We sometimes use our female roles as an excuse for not going into our worlds with the Gospel. They become the skirts we hide behind, our rationalizations for not sticking our necks out to serve the Lord in new and meaningful ways.
How about you? Ready to break some molds. Look at these women in Luke 8 and ask God to give you the wisdom and courage to know when to break away from what is "acceptable behavior" into new territory to follow him more perfectly.
We see in Luke 8 that there was a group of women who followed and supported Jesus and his disciples as they travelled. Unusual women—breaking out of traditional roles to follow Jesus. What can we learn from their example?
I have to believe that the disciples had some difficulty getting used to having women following them. But notice that Jesus allowed them to come along. We see no indication that he urged them to return or refused to accept their support.
No, in fact he had cured many of these women of evil spirits and diseases. And I believe he was delighted to have them come along and testify to what he had done for them. I can just see Mary Magdalene, as they enter a town, standing in the midst of a group of strangers who are listening with intensity as she tells them how Jesus delivered her from seven evil spirits. What a testimony she must have had, and I can imagine that many others were delivered by Jesus because of her witness.
We see another woman, Joanna, who had been healed by Jesus. She was the wife of a prominent man in Herod's government. It had to be most unusual for a woman in her position to decide to follow this itinerant preacher around, to support him and his team. I wonder if that was even a consideration with Joanna. Don't you imagine she was so grateful to Jesus for what he had done in her life, that she simply was compelled to follow him? She was married, and she must have had her husband's consent to leave her home in order to follow Jesus. But she didn't let anything stop her, not even traditions of her day.
Evidently these were women of means, because they supported Jesus and the disciples out of their own pockets. Imagine that; these women picked up the tab. That had to be more unusual then than it is even now.
It might have been a little hard at first for the disciples to take money from the women. But they learned the wonderful lesson that we are one in Christ and we share the ministry of the gospel equally.
I'm reminded of Paul's words which tell us that in Christ "There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus” (Galatians 3:28). These women and men did not allow tradition to keep them from working together as one body, with one mission, to tell the world about Jesus Christ. We need to rethink our roles and traditions and see if they are inhibiting us and keeping us from being everything God wants us to be.
With female roles changing rapidly in our society, we've seen a lot of molds broken by women. Have you been puzzled about whether Christian women should or should not be mold-breakers? I'm going to talk about some women in Scripture who broke the molds of their day.
We women are doing things never dreamed of by our grandmothers, and our lifestyles are changing in many respects. We can applaud some of these opportunities we have been given—and indeed have insisted on having—in the last five or six decades. But we can also see how we've thrown the baby out with the water all too often as we've pushed forward to plow new ground.
But mold-breaking, in and of itself, is not wrong. In fact, if we as Christians are not willing to break out of the "this is the way we've always done it" syndrome, we'll lose our effectiveness as witnesses to a dying world. We need some mold-breaking Christians—yes, women—who are willing to be different in order to be what God wants them to be.
I want to briefly look at some women in the Bible who broke the molds in their days. In Luke 8 we see a group of them, who traveled with Jesus and the disciples from one town and village to another, proclaiming the good news. There was Mary (called Magdalene) from whom seven demons had come out; Joanna the wife of Cuza, the manager of Herod's household; Susanna, and many others. These women were helping to support Jesus and the disciples out of their own means.
Here are some most unusual women. When travel was very difficult and dangerous and when women were expected to stay home, these women were traveling, following behind and supporting a group of men. Can you picture this group walking down the dirt road, Jesus and 12 men, followed by a large number of women? Not exactly traditional roles for women of their day.
Why did they do this? Were they trying to prove something, trying to enlarge their boundaries? What caused them to take these kinds of risks and play a different role than was expected of women in their day? I want to look at these women and see if we, as Christian women today, can learn something from them.
Did you make any New Year’s resolutions at the beginning of the year? It’s May now and I wonder if you did make any resolutions, do you even remember them? And if you remember them, did you keep them?
I wouldn’t want to know how many resolutions I’ve made that just petered out after awhile. I really meant to keep them; I started off with a strong commitment and a big push, but somehow the passion just faded with time. You too?
Recently a friend gave me a book by a business woman named Patty Azzarello. The book is called Rise, and she says it gives three practical steps for advancing your career, standing out as a leader, and liking your life. Well, that’s a pretty tall order for a book to deliver, but even though it’s not written from a biblical perspective, some of her thoughts are helpful. So, today I want to talk about Ruthless Priorities, which she defines as overachieving where it counts.
Years ago God taught me that I can’t do everything; I can’t even do everything I’m capable of doing or would like to do. I have to make choices and those choices determine whether what I do counts in the Kingdom or not. Truly, in order to do God’s will, we need ruthless priorities; priorities that are clearly established in our minds and to which we ruthlessly hold. Otherwise, we will be pulled in a hundred different directions, and accomplish very little that truly counts for eternity. Without some ruthless priorities in our lives, we’ll continue to make sincere resolutions that don’t last very long!
One of the chapters in this book is entitled “Be Less Busy,” which doesn’t sound like the way to advance your career, does it? But truthfully, we have to begin by getting rid of our preconceived idea that busyness means productivity. When I first began my career years ago, I noticed that many people in the company worked very long hours and took great pride in it. They seemed to think that putting in lots of extra hours meant they were demonstrating a higher commitment to the job; they were doing a better job than the rest of us. Patty says in her book, “Many people feel that if they are not fully consumed with work and always appearing to be super busy, people will question their commitment and their value.” (p.15)
I truly believe in working hard, but equally important is working smart. Getting great results with less work is the sign of a very smart person. As Patty puts it, “Just because you can work tirelessly doesn’t mean you should.” (p.17)
Do you have a ruthless priority for your life that you will slow down; that you will truly “be still and know that God is God”? There’s an African proverb that says, “Hurry, hurry has no blessing,” and truly it doesn’t. Slowing down so we have time to know God has to be our highest priority, and when it is, you’ll get more done in less time, and you won’t be so frayed around the edges.
I certainly agree that we should overachieve in some areas; we should go extra miles and do more than we have to do. But are we overachieving where it counts?
Maybe, like me, you have a “to do” list that you use to make sure you do what you need to do. But perhaps we need a “not to do” list as well, to remind us that we cannot be all things to all people, we are not super-people, God has not called us to burn out, and therefore some things will have to be left undone if we have ruthless priorities.
The dictionary says that ruthless means without pity or compassion; merciless; heartless. Well, we certainly don’t want to be ruthless people, but we need to establish ruthless priorities for our lives. That means that we are merciless about saying no to the truly unimportant things which clamor for our time and attention. We are determined not to be sidetracked by the tyranny of the urgent which keeps us from overachieving where it counts.
Think of it this way: What do you want to be said about you after you’re gone? What do you want to be remembered for?
Do you remember the famous quote from Charlie Brown? “I love mankind; it’s people I can’t stand.” Well, sometimes life seems that way, doesn’t it? As Christians we are to love the world, and we do things to help mankind all over the world. But what about the people, the individuals, you have to work with everyday? They can be a lot more difficult to love.
That’s because we all have annoying habits that can start to grate on people’s nerves, and we’ve been looking at some of the annoying bad habits of coworkers this week. For example, suppose you work with someone who is always in crisis mode and frequently asks you to “do them a favor” and bail them out. But the reason they’re in crisis mode so often is because they procrastinate and put everything off until crunch time. Are you supposed to continue to go the extra mile and “do them a favor,” as they ask?
In Matthew 5 Jesus exhorts us to turn the other cheek and go the extra-mile. There’s no question that Christians are supposed to do more than they have to do. So, on occasion when your coworker needs an extra pair of hands to get a job done, you should be willing to do that. But I don’t believe Jesus intended for us to go extra mile after extra mile. That would lead us to becoming enablers, making it possible for others to shirk their own responsibilities, and that is neither right for us nor for the other person.
So, with that crisis-mode coworker, you might say, “I’ll help you this time, but in the future, you can avoid this last-minute crunch by . . .” and then explain how it can be avoided, making it clear that you won’t be available to help with every crisis they have. Again, these words need to be spoken in love, from an attitude of helpfulness, not annoyance.
You know, so often it’s the way you say things that makes all the difference, and you could help this person break a bad habit of procrastination by combining a willingness to help with a little softly-given advice. Who knows; they might even listen and learn.
Remember, no one is in your life by accident, not even the annoying coworker. And we are called not only to love mankind, but to love the individual who can be annoying!
(Please click here if you would like to download the entire devotional for this week.)
What is the most annoying habit of a coworker that you’ve had to deal with on your job? Well, that’s the way life is sometimes, right? So how should a Christian respond to these annoyances? We’ve looked at several annoying habits already. Now, here’s another one:
It’s the coworker who interrupts you continually, sometimes for work-related issues, sometimes not. But the interruptions are often unnecessary, and they definitely impact your productivity—as well as annoy you.
There’s no doubt that one of our major time wasters is interruptions. Every time we start and stop what we’re doing, we lose time. So, you need to think of creative ways to eliminate these unnecessary interruptions.
First, determine if you’re doing something to encourage the interruptions. For example, when they walk by your desk or office, don’t look up and give eye contact, which can invite a trivial interruption. And if that candy dish on your desk is too inviting, you may need to remove it.
Secondly, for necessary interruptions with work-related questions, it might be helpful to establish a daily time for interaction. You might suggest that the two of you get together first thing each morning to go over the day’s agenda. Frankly, managers can be the worst interrupters, and you could even suggest to your manager that an established daily meeting could save both of you lots of time—just to set the agenda and go over questions for the day.
Or you may have to become a bit more assertive, and simply say to the habitual interrupter, “You know, I just don’t have time to chat right now. Can we talk later?” That’s much nicer than showing annoyance through body language or harsh words.
Obviously, this is not a major issue. It’s just an annoyance. But these little things can start to add up and before you know it, you have a major issue on your hands. So, think of a positive, pleasant approach to try to change that annoying habit, but don’t let it cause you to respond poorly.
Paul wrote to the Colossians: “Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone” (Colossians 4:6). In responding to annoying people, we want to make this our objective—to be gracious and kind.
Annoying bad habits of coworkers can start to drive you crazy! I’m sure you know what I’m talking about. These are not major issues—just little things that can become real stumbling blocks to good working relationships. We need to know the best way to respond to a coworker with an annoying habit, and more importantly, make certain we get rid of any of our own annoying habits.
So, here’s the third annoying habit: The coworker who tends to gripe and complain a great deal. This can be terribly annoying and if you’re not careful, they can bring you right down to their level and you’ll find yourself griping and complaining more than you should.
One negative person can poison the atmosphere where you work. It only takes one. If you happen to work with that one person, you must first learn how to tune them out and not allow their negative talk to infiltrate your own mind. Then remember that a person’s attitude is always their choice, and we don’t have the power to change anyone else’s attitude. So, if your coworker chooses to gripe and complain a great deal, your best way to deal with it is to respond in positive ways. Do it nicely, kindly, but firmly—don’t be afraid to be positive in the presence of a person who is negative.
And of course, pray for that person. Underneath that negative exterior is something else that is causing the problem. You may never know exactly what that is; it could be baggage from childhood. But you can still pray that God will help you to respond in kindness, to have sympathy for that person, to show them mercy and grace even when you don’t want to.
It is in these small issues of life that we have the greatest opportunity to demonstrate God’s love. Maybe not in words or by quoting scripture, but simply by remaining joyful and peaceful even when dealing with an annoying negative coworker.
Have you ever thought about your own tendency to be negative? Years ago I finally began to pay attention to my own negative attitude, and realized I was far more negative than I thought I was. I heard myself saying lots of negative junk in any given day, and I began to monitor my own attitude. It’s a very good habit to form—to just make sure you haven’t caught the negative disease yourself.
Do you work with someone who just can’t ever seem to get to work on time? Someone who is habitually late is not committing a great offense. This is simply an annoying bad habit. But then, that’s what we’re talking about this week, annoying bad habits of coworkers and how we should respond to them.
I find that many who are guilty of habitual lateness frequently want to justify it by saying that they work late to make up for it, or they have a very long commute, and that may be true. But the facts are, if your company has a certain start time, everyone should be there on time consistently. Why? Because it’s the right thing to do.
This is a management issue. If it’s important for people to be on time, management must set the priorities, communicate them clearly, and hold people accountable. There would have to be some kind of negative consequence for the person who will not change that annoying habit.
However, if you’re not this person’s manager, there’s not a whole lot you can do about this annoying habit. One thing you don’t want to do is make snide remarks about it or communicate your annoyance with body language or harsh words. Unfortunately, that happens too often where people don’t confront the real issue and instead display their displeasure in other ineffective and unkind ways.
If a coworker’s habitual lateness is having a direct negative impact on your ability to get your job done, that might be an indication that it needs to be addressed. First, try to kindly explain to the coworker the need you have for them to be on time, and see if that might work. But remember, unless you’re the manager, you don’t have the authority to demand anything from that person.
Isn’t it interesting how something so small as this annoying habit can so easily turn into a real issue between two people and eventually lead to other, more major problems. That’s because we dwell on these little things, allow them to occupy too much thought time, and develop an attitude pretty quickly.
If you are powerless to either change or address this annoying habit of a coworker, then it’s time to let it go. Colossians 3:13 tells us to “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” Just let it go—it won’t kill you!
No doubt you have worked with or for someone who had some annoying habits. I thought it would be a good idea to look at some of these, ask how we should respond to such a coworker, and most importantly, make certain we are not guilty of annoying habits ourselves.
So, let’s consider annoying habit number one: You work with a person who makes daily calls to their mate or partner, and since you work in an open setting, you can’t help but hear the conversation. Depending on how they are getting along on any particular day, you may hear a nasty conversation with anger and accusations, or you may hear what sounds like sweet murmurings or baby talk.
Obviously, if you hold a supervisory position over this person, it should be addressed directly with clear instructions that those kinds of conversations should be on personal time and equipment, not on company time. However, if you are not this person’s manager or supervisor, you may be able to bring this to your coworker’s attention in such a way that they will see the benefit of changing that annoying habit.
Proverbs 17:27 says, “The one who has knowledge uses words with restraint, and whoever has understanding is even-tempered.” Your words would need to be carefully chosen, delivered kindly, and done with the right motivation.
For example, you might find the right moment—a private moment—to say something like, “You probably are not aware that your conversations with your mate can be heard by other people. I thought I’d let you know, because I know if it were me, I wouldn’t want others to listen in to my daily personal conversations. You might want to reserve those calls for times when you’re alone.”
There’s a lesson for all of us to learn in this, and that is, to use our working time to work, not to rob our employer of the time when we are paid to work with elongated personal conversations, whether they’re overheard by others or not.
As Christians in the workplace, these little annoying habits can do damage to our testimony for Jesus Christ, so we should make sure we’re not guilty of these.
Let’s briefly review the first three biblical principles to help us deal with a job we hate:
First, we must give up our "rights" to have a job we love and give God permission to keep us in that job if he has good purposes for us there.
Second, we must change employers and start working for Jesus, not for people. And that includes to stop working just for our own selfish reasons, such as money, advancement or power.
Third, we need an eternal perspective to remember that God will reward us for work well done if we do it as unto him. Even that hum-drum job, when done to please the Lord, will be recognized and rewarded by our heavenly Father. So, we need to work for God's rewards, not for the recognition of people.
Then, step four in being content in a job you hate is to ask God what he has to teach you through this job. Have you gone to God and said, "Lord, I'm in a job I hate and I can't get out, at least not right now. Why am I here? What are you trying to teach me or do through me in this job?"
You remember Joseph, sold into slavery in Egypt by his brothers and treated unfairly and cruelly by his captors, wrongly imprisoned for two years for doing the right thing. Then God delivered him from that prison and he became second in command to the Pharaoh.
Joseph said of his bad experience that his brothers meant harm to him when they sold him into slavery, but God meant it for good. Joseph allowed God to turn a terrible experience into a blessing. But please note that God was able to turn it into a blessing because Joseph was willing to let him.
God may have you in that job you hate because he has a blessing there for you, but because of your attitude, he can't work that blessing for you yet. If Joseph had gotten bitter or remained angry or been rebellious, he would not have been able to interpret the Pharaoh's dream and he would have just rotted in that prison.
I spent three years in a miserable job at one point, and for the first year I rebelled and complained and felt sorry for myself. With that attitude, God couldn't do anything for me. When I finally realized that God had me there for a purpose and I wasn't going to get out of it until I learned those lessons, then so many good things started to happen.
First, the difficult job became much easier to handle when I abandoned my self-focused attitude and asked God to work his purpose for me in that job I hated. Going to work wasn't nearly as difficult after that.
Then, God began to use me in the lives of some of my coworkers, and I was able to be a witness for the Lord there, even to that difficult boss. And I gained some business experience, which eventually became very instrumental in my ability to go out on my own and become self-employed. And that allowed me to start this radio ministry many years ago. So, God had great purposes for me in that job which I couldn't even imagine at the time, but now I can see how he was working good for me right in that job I hated.
Are you rotting in your miserable job because you haven't given God permission to use it in your life for good? Believe me, there are miracles waiting for you in that job you hate, if you will in humility make up your mind to work for God and seek his reward, and look for the good that God wants to do for you and through you right where you are.
You'll know contentment even in a miserable job if you have that attitude. It's the attitude that Jesus had when he was willing to leave heaven and come to earth to die for us. Surely it was a job he didn't relish, but he knew God would work redemption through it, and so he submitted to the good that God wanted to do by sending him to a job he did not enjoy.
Let this same mind be in you which was in Christ Jesus, Paul wrote, and if you have his mind, you will be content wherever you are, even in a job you hate, as long as God has you there for his purposes.
Notice I didn't say "with" a job you hate, but "in" a job you hate.
(as presented by Lisa Bishop)
If you want unwavering confidence in life, it matters who and what you place your confidence in. As a follower of Jesus, we need to take inventory of the ways we pursue assurance, and how we misplace our confidence in things other than him.
What is a fail proof method to grow in unwavering confidence? Immersing yourself in the Word of God so that you are reminded of the character of God and his promises to you.
When you remember who God is, your confidence will increase. I know it can be hard to remain steadfast in our confidence in the Lord. Life circumstances come, we are caught off guard and our confidence can be like a teeter totter. One minute it is high, the next minute it is low. But as we mature in our faith, we level out and we learn that no matter our circumstances, God can be trusted.
“In the fear of the Lord there is strong confidence, and his children will have refuge” (Proverbs 14:26, ESV).
When we are instructed to fear the Lord the word fear means to show honor, reverence, and a sense of awe towards God. And in Proverbs 14:26 the fear of the Lord, means an awe of God that moves us from self-confidence and towards strong confidence in his love and greatness.
As his child, God will always provide himself as a refuge for you. This means when life is hard and you are tempted to despair, be discouraged or doubt God, he is, as the Psalmist says in Psalm 46:1, your refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.
While life may throw you curveballs and loss and chaos may ensue at the most surprising times, you serve a God who is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow. He is not surprised by the things that life throws your way, He sees you. He knows, he cares, he is with you. “I will never fail you. I will never abandon you” (Hebrews 13:5b, NLT).
What is one step you will take in building your unwavering confidence in God? Maybe it is journaling so that you can reflect back on the ways that you saw God working in your life. Maybe it is reciting the names and attributes of God so that you remember his character. As the Psalmist says in Psalm 62:8, “Trust [confidently] in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge.”
(Click here to download the message for the entire week.)
(as presented by Lisa Bishop)
In Psalm 16:7-9 the Psalmist declares: “I will praise the Lord, who counsels me; even at night my heart instructs me. I keep my eyes always on the Lord. With him at my right hand, I will not be shaken. Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body also will rest secure.” You can hear the Psalmist’s unwavering confidence in receiving the counsel and instruction of the Lord. He knows God will guide him!
And notice the reason that the Psalmist is so confident in receiving godly wisdom, why he is not shaken and his flesh dwells secure. The reason he does not waver is because he has set the Lord always before him. And when he sets the Lord before him, when he puts God first and seeks him first, the Psalmist’s heart is glad and his whole being rejoices.
I love how God is so straight forward. How he makes his promises so clear in his Word and the benefits when we obey. James 1:5 instructs us when it says, “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.” Where are you relying on your own wisdom when God is inviting you to ask for godly counsel? Where are you putting your confidence in human instruction and not divine guidance?
Maybe you are in the midst of a career transition and up until now you have tried to figure out the next steps on your own. Perhaps you are in a financial crisis or your marriage is in ruin and you are seeking the counsel of friends before putting God first and asking him to instruct you.
If you are a follower of Jesus that means that you received the Holy Spirit the moment you put your confidence in and received Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. And Jesus says that his Holy Spirit is your counselor, your guide, your helper, your wisdom. Bring your current circumstance before the Lord, put him first. Resist seeking human advice before seeking the counsel of God. Watch out for ways you misplace your confidence and redirect your trust to Jesus.
Ask him to help you. He is waiting to give to you generously.
(as presented by Lisa Bishop)
Have you ever tried to figure something out, relying on your own knowledge and perception only to be frustrated and maybe a little discouraged?
A very dear friend of mine, Mercy, lives in Zambia. She and I met five years ago when she was in the United States. We quickly became friends even though we are separated by over 8300 miles. Thanks to technology we keep in touch.
Last year when I spent time in Zambia I was able to see a project that Mercy is working on. After being in an abusive marriage and losing a niece to suicide because of spousal abuse, the Lord gave her a vision to build a safehouse for abused women and children. Mercy was pastoring full time when the Lord instructed her to quit her job and sell everything. As Mercy tells the story, it did not make sense to her so she delayed two years until finally she could no longer ignore God’s call.
Mercy said yes when the Lord gave her this incredible God-sized vision. She had no clue how the funds would be raised to buy a plot of land in the bush and to build and staff the safehouse, but Mercy stepped out in faith. Her confidence in God propelled her forward. It is quite amazing to witness.
Being the planner that I am and wanting to feel some measure of control, I marvel at how Mercy has completely surrendered and trusted the Lord to provide what she needs to fulfill God’s vision. Just the other day I asked her how things are going with the safehouse. She said, “I just take each day and trust. The Lord started it and he will finish it. I am trusting him to finish and accomplish what he began.”
If that isn’t unwavering confidence in the Lord I don’t know what is!
Proverbs 3:5-6 says, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.“
Jeremiah 17:7 “But blessed is the one who trusts in the LORD, whose confidence is in him.”
Where is your confidence and trust? Are you in the midst of a circumstance where you are relying on your own understanding to reach a solution? Maybe a relational breakdown, work conflict or a job loss? Are you in a situation where you are trying to lean on your own understanding?
Ask God what he wants you to do at this moment. Ask Jesus to help you put your confidence in him and to submit your ways to him…and he will make your paths straight.
(as presented by Lisa Bishop)
In the book of Philippians, the Apostle Paul reminds us to put no confidence in the flesh but to put our confidence in The Lord. “Boast in Christ Jesus and put no confidence in the flesh—though I myself have reasons for such confidence. If someone else thinks they have reasons to put confidence in the flesh, I have more: (Philippians 3:3b-4).
And then in verses 5-6 he starts a laundry list of reasons for his flesh boosting confidence: “Circumcised on the eighth day, of the people of Israel, of the tribe of Benjamin, a Hebrew of Hebrews; in regard to the law, a Pharisee; as for zeal, persecuting the church; as for righteousness based on the law, faultless (Philippians 3:5-6).
In his days before following Jesus, I can see Paul pounding his chest with pride as he read through this list, but now that his allegiance is to Jesus and he is living his life for God, his posture is different.
Even with his own impressive pedigree, Paul warns us to put our confidence in the Lord and not in our accomplishments, in our own abilities.
We can so easily find ourselves boasting and bragging about our achievements that we can become arrogant and prideful. Proverbs 16:18 signals us about misplaced confidence when it says, “Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.” Now does this mean we can’t be confident in our abilities? No, but it does remind us that our ultimate confidence is not in ourselves but in Jesus himself.
On the other hand, maybe you are not arrogant and prideful and boastful. Maybe you sell yourself short and shrink back because you don’t think you are enough or that you are inadequate. That is putting confidence in your flesh too because you aren’t relying on who Jesus says you are and your identity in him. Thinking less of yourself is not the antidote to pride. Placing your confidence in Jesus is the ultimate prize.
Confidence in the flesh can go both ways. Boasting and hiding when our confidence is misplaced. What or who is your confidence dependent upon? Ask God to reveal areas where you are boasting in your flesh and not in him.
(as presented by Lisa Bishop)
Several years ago, 40 to be exact, my best friend and I wanted to be part of the 8th grade cheerleading squad. I had never done the splits, nor come close in my life, but we decided to practice and give it a shot. For several weeks we perfected our cartwheels and roundoffs. I remember inch by inch getting closer and closer to doing the splits as I looked in the wall of mirrors in my parent’s bedroom. I was trying to build my skill and my confidence as we prepared for tryouts.
Fast forward a few weeks and it was time to put our skills to the test. I distinctly remember walking into my middle school building and approaching the gymnasium with fear gripping me and butterflies in my stomach. Have you ever felt that? We got a few feet away from the door when we both looked at each other and in total fear and panic turned around and high tailed it the other way. We had lost our confidence and fear caused us to run. I never ended up trying out for cheerleading. I will never know if I could have made the cut but to this day I wonder what would have happened if I did not let fear of failure grip me. The fear of being rejected, not making the team, looking like a fool and what other people would think of me overruled my confidence to try.
It reminds me of when Noah built the arc. Now I am not saying that 8th grade cheerleading tryouts hold a candle to Noah building the arc, but stick with me here. We see Noah’s story in the book of Genesis. As God is preparing to bring judgment on the earth through a massive flood, he instructs Noah to build a huge boat when there is not even a drop of rain or a cloud in sight. Yet regardless of what he could not see, Noah obeyed God. He followed God’s instructions even when they did not make sense at the time. I can imagine the mocking and jeering that must have happened as Noah labored to build and obey God. He probably looked ridiculous. Yet, if Noah would have put his confidence in what other people thought of him, he never would have picked up that first piece of wood. Even though others probably thought he was crazy, he remained faithful. His confidence was not in what others thought about him but what in God instructed him to do.
When we put our confidence in the opinion of others, what people think about us, it will cause us to miss out. When we live our lives to avoid the feeling of rejection or in the mode of self-protection, we can forfeit a fulfilling future. When we give power to the opinions of others, we play small rather than stepping into obedience and a grand adventure with God.
Where are you putting your confidence in—the opinion of others and not in God?
It seems like more people are discontent with their jobs these days than ever before for lots of different reasons. Also, workloads seem to be much higher, and the loyalty between employees and employers seems much lower. So, if you find yourself in a job you really don't like, you've got company.
I can understand your predicament because I've had a job or two like that myself. But the Apostle Paul wrote to the Philippians: ...I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation....I can do everything through him who gives me strength
(Philippians 4:11-12). So, I want to talk about how to be content in a job you hate. You know, when you and I learn this secret of being content, as Paul learned it, we can't lose because our fulfillment and satisfaction are not based on circumstances—not based on whether we have a terrific job that we love, or one that we hate!
Keep in mind that Paul had to learn this technique of being content, and so do we. So, are you willing to enroll in Contentment 101, and learn how to be content in your job? That's where it begins. If you're not willing to learn to be content, of course, you never will learn it.
If you insist on saying, "I hate this job, I refuse to change my attitude toward this job, I could never be content with this job and furthermore I don't want to be content with it," then you've already prevented God from changing you and giving you a new heart and a new attitude.
First of all, you have to give up your rights. Most of us think things like, "I don't deserve this job," or "I deserve to have a fulfilling job," or "It's not right that I have to work at a job that doesn't utilize my talents," or "I can't be expected to endure the kind of treatment I get on my job.” That's just our normal selfish nature, which has been fed and fired up by our humanistic society, teaching us "We have our rights.”
Dear friend, if you want to be a contented person, you must first of all tell God that you recognize you have no rights to all that you think you have a right to. If you're a child of God, you belong to him and he is the Master. Are you willing to give up your "rights" to have the job you want, and to allow yourself to be contented where you are? That is step one in being content in a job you hate.
Maybe you're thinking, "Well, why would God punish me with a job like this?” Let me assure you that God is not trying to make your life miserable. Just the opposite. He has plans for you that are good. But he can't work those plans for you until you surrender your rights to him. Most of the time God does not deliver us from difficult situations until we have learned to be content and to accept them. That is how we learn to trust God and have faith in him, and without faith it's impossible to please God.
So, step one in being content in a job you hate is to give up your rights for the perfect job and tell God you are willing to stay there and give him control.
Here's step two in being content in a job you hate: Change employers. That's right—just change employers right now, today. But, you say, "You just said be willing to stay in the job you have. Besides, I can't just change jobs like that.” Oh, I didn't say change jobs; I said change employers.
Paul wrote to the Colossians: "Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart as working for the Lord, not for men.” Did you realize you can change employers without changing jobs? Just say out loud, "I no longer work for that company or that person, I have a new boss. I now work for the Lord.”
Keep that thought in your mind all day long as you're working and keep telling yourself over and over this truth: "I report to Jesus. Therefore, I must be careful how I act and I need to watch my attitude, because I report to a higher level of management: Jesus himself."
Do we really need self-confidence? As we've looked at the Apostle Peter and his example as well as other Scriptures, self-confidence is not what we need. Indeed, it tends to fail us just when we need it the most. What we truly need is God-confidence.
Why would we want to run on self-confidence when God-confidence is available to us? Can we doubt that God-confidence has much more to offer and self-confidence is unreliable? Then why do we run back to the world's weak and miserable principles?
May I suggest that it is because the philosophy of self-confidence looks good, and it appears to work for some people. So, we swallow the bait, and are deceived again by the master-liar, the father of lies, our enemy, Satan.
If you're still running on self-confidence, you can either make a choice to abandon it, or you can keep on until it runs out of gas on its own, which it will eventually do. Maybe that's happened to you already, and you're now wallowing in the shambles of that failed self-confidence. Either way, if you will choose God-confidence, it can be yours.
To have God-confidence, you must first have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, which requires repentance and a turning away from your sins. Then, you must pursue knowing God as your highest priority. You must be willing to allow the Holy Spirit to control your life, and that is your choice.
That will not happen by accident; it will happen as you purpose in your heart to know God. I can assure you of this, the more you know him, the more confidence you will have in him. The more his Word is the central focus of your existence, the more confident you will be.
So, I encourage you to abandon your quest for self-confidence. Pursue, instead, a dedicated commitment to know God and have his confidence dwelling in you. Like Peter, you will see a transformation in your life when you go from operating on self-confidence to operating on God-confidence.
(Click here if you would like to download the entire message for this week.)
Have you discovered that self-confidence is very undependable? Just when you think you've got it down pat, it falls apart on you. Just when you need it the most, self-confidence seems to shatter. That's been my experience.
I spent ten years building my life on self-confidence in my own achievements. I could list the successes I had in the business world during those ten years, and you might think I had done pretty well. I had self-confidence, but it kept falling apart on me all the time.
I thank God that my self-confidence was shattered many years ago because then I finally turned to my Savior and said, "I just can't do it anymore. I'm a failure, I can't cope, I'm an emotional yo-yo, I'm just a mess.” In spite of the successes I had stacked up in the business world, I was at the end of my self-confident rope.
Once that self-confidence was shattered, then I turned back to God. And then the God-confidence began and each day is another opportunity to grow in my trust of God and to operate now in his power instead of my own. But it began when my own self-confidence was shattered.
Paul wrote to the Philippians: "We are, remember, truly circumcised when we worship God by the Spirit, when we find our joy in Jesus Christ and put no confidence in what we are in the flesh" (Philippians 3:3, Phillips). He was reminding his Jewish brothers and sisters that outward rituals and signs are not the evidence of our relationship to God, but we are truly rightly related to God when we are Spirit-controlled, when we find our joy in Jesus Christ, and when we have no self-confidence.
I wonder, have you been on a misguided search for self-confidence? Though you know God through Jesus Christ, have you been running your life by the world's principles, as I did for so long? Paul wrote to the Galatians: " Formerly, when you did not know God, you were slaves to those who by nature are not gods. But now that you know God—or rather are known by God—how is it that you are turning back to those weak and miserable forces? Do you wish to be enslaved by them all over again?” (Galatians 4:8-9).
Self-confidence can be an enslaving principle. We need instead God-confidence.
I'd like to ask you to picture two scenes. Picture the Apostle Peter as he stood outside the gate at Jesus' trial and denies that he ever knew Jesus, denying it with cursing and swearing. And only a few short hours earlier he had been totally confident that he never would do that—never! Now, picture a second scene. Peter healing the lame man, who goes leaping and jumping into the temple, praising God for his healing.
What happened to the Apostle Peter in the few intervening days between those two scenes? In the first instance, though totally self-confident, he had failed miserably. In the second scene, he displays a confident approach, and yet the results are quite different. He was not a miserable failure.
What happened was that Peter lost all his self-confidence and gained in its place God-confidence. After he had healed that lame man, he said to the amazed people who were watching: “Fellow Israelites, why does this surprise you? Why do you stare at us as if by our own power or godliness we had made this man walk? The God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, the God of our fathers, has glorified his servant Jesus. You handed him over to be killed, and you disowned him before Pilate, though he had decided to let him go... By faith in the name of Jesus, this man whom you see and know was made strong. It is Jesus’ name and the faith that comes through him that has completely healed him, as you can all see” (Acts 3:12-13, 16)
When Peter spoke now, he was filled with the Holy Spirit. No more shooting off his mouth as before when he operated out of self-confidence. With the self-confidence destroyed and replaced by God-confidence, Peter spoke with great power and was successful in his service for Jesus.
Notice, however, that the loss of self-confidence didn't turn Peter into a sniveling, cowardly wimp of a man. He didn't walk around with his head hanging down; quite the opposite. He was more bold than ever before, because he was controlled by God and his confidence was in someone much more capable and powerful than himself.
My dear friend, self-confidence is a deceptive allurement that this world system has fostered upon us. Maybe like Peter, you have gone from one sad experience to another, as your self-confidence fell apart. Or maybe your self-confidence brought some temporary achievements, you’ve discovered that it is so fragile and so easily intimidated, that it falls apart at the first adverse wind that comes along.
The good news is, you don't need that undependable self-confidence, you need God-confidence, and you can have it.
Do you really need self-confidence? Most everyone would tell you that it is absolutely essential to success, but I have discovered that my self-confidence usually lets me down when I need it the most. The same was true of the Apostle Peter. He was extremely self-confident, but over and over again that self-confidence fell apart.
However, there was a great change in Peter which we can see beginning in the book of Acts. You remember the story of Peter and John encountering a lame beggar at the temple. Peter looked at that lame man and said in his most confident manner, " In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, walk” (Acts 3:6). And guess what—the man went into the temple walking and leaping and praising God.
When questioned by the religious leaders as to how he had done this, Peter gave a most confident response: “By faith in the name of Jesus, this man whom you see and know was made strong. It is Jesus’ name and the faith that comes through him that has completely healed him, as you can all see" (Acts 3:16).
This man Peter, who had failed miserably at every turn when he relied on self-confidence and who had cowardly denied Jesus three times, now stood tall among people who were seeking to harm him and proclaimed to them the gospel of Jesus Christ. Verses 13 and 14 of Acts 4 are very revealing: “When they saw the courage of Peter and John and realized that they were unschooled, ordinary men, they were astonished and they took note that these men had been with Jesus. But since they could see the man who had been healed standing there with them, there was nothing they could say.”
Peter's confidence amazed them but notice that it was not self-confidence. These people knew that Peter was not able to heal this man or speak as he did because of his own education or training. Peter was no longer operating on self-confidence. That had been totally shattered. But his confidence and trust in Jesus Christ the Nazarene gave him a boldness he had never known before, and power. The lame man was healed, he was able to persuade thousands of converts, and he led the early church as they changed the course of history.
Self-confidence—a word which defines itself. Would you describe yourself as a person with good self-confidence? Are you confident about your abilities and talents, your accomplishments and experience? The world says you have to have self-confidence in order to succeed, especially in the business world.
When I think of a very self-confident person, I think of the Apostle Peter. Now, here was a man very confident in himself. He was the only disciple who was confident he could walk on water. He was confident in his fishing abilities and knowledge. He was confident that Jesus was wrong to say he was going to die and rebuked him for it. He was totally confident that he, Peter, would never deny Jesus, even if everyone else did, even if he had to die with Jesus.
Peter did not lack self-confidence. However, all that self-confidence failed him at the critical moments of his life. He began to walk on water but very soon started sinking. Self-confidence didn't keep him up. Self-confidence didn't fill his empty nets with fish after a long night of fishing. Only when he followed Jesus' instructions was he able to catch fish. Though he was very confident in rebuking Jesus, Jesus not only did not take his counsel, but considered it to be satanically inspired. And within hours of his most confident assertion that he would never deny Jesus, he did so three times with cursing.
Peter's example tends to give self-confidence a black eye. We've been led to believe that self-confidence is the key to success, but Peter's experiences could cause one to lose confidence in self-confidence.
But, thank God, that's not the end of Peter's story. We see a transformed Peter in the book of Acts. He was still extremely confident, still assertive, still a leader, but the results were very different
If you've been struggling with your own self-confidence, Peter's experience should come as very good news for you today. You really don't need self-confidence, but you do need God confidence, and you can have that.
Having been to Israel many times, leading tours, I have a much clearer vision of what a crucifixion was really like, and how horrendous it must have been to have watched anyone dying on a cross. We have tended to romanticize the cross a bit, with our jewelry and pictures of a cross on a hill far away, but actually the place of crucifixion was the most horrible place in Jerusalem. It would have been by a busy roadway so everyone could see and mock and be terrified by a crucifixion. It was meant to be a deterrent to crime and rebellion, to cause anyone who thought they might challenge the rule of Rome to think twice, because they would have to endure this horrible death.
Knowing how awful a crucifixion was, it is amazing to read in Matthew 27:55-56 that “Many women were there, watching from a distance. They had followed Jesus from Galilee to care for his needs. Among them were Mary Magdalene, Mary the mother of James and Moses, and the mother of Zebedee’s sons.” In Mark 15:40-41 we read: “Some women were watching from a distance. Among them were Mary Magdalene, Mary the mother of James the younger and of Joses, and Salome. In Galilee these women had followed him and cared for his needs. Many other women who had come up with him to Jerusalem were also there.”
Luke tells us that “A large number of people followed him, including women who mourned and wailed for him” (Luke 23:27). And John tells us “Near the cross of Jesus stood his mother, his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene” (John 19:25).
By my count, there are seven women who are identified in the four gospels, but we know there were many others as well. It’s interesting to me that the women are named, and yet there are no named men at the cross. Certainly, there were men there, but how many were the friends and disciples of Jesus Christ? We only know for sure that John was there, because Jesus refers to him in John 19, as he instructs him to care for his mother. Where were the other disciples?
And why were all these women there at this ugly scene? It was not a place for a woman; if it was your close relative, you might have been there, but typically women did not go to such a horrible place. Yet there were all these women at the cross of Jesus. These women had gathered there to mourn and to wail the crucifixion of their Savior, Jesus Christ.
They were there because they loved Jesus. They had been delivered from their sins and their pasts by Jesus, and they were determined to stay with him until the end, as ugly as it was. Can you even imagine what it meant for these women to stay there throughout the whole crucifixion?
Mary Magdalene was there. We know that Jesus had delivered her from seven demons. There have been some scurrilous writings and suggestions that Jesus had a romantic relationship with Mary Magdalene. That is a lie and totally unsubstantiated by Scripture or history. But for sure, this woman had deep feelings for Jesus because he had delivered her from her past. And it was an awful past.
Can you even imagine being possessed by seven demons? What could be worse than to be indwelled by seven demons from hell? No doubt she had been abused and suffered great harm from these demons for many years. No doubt she was full of guilt and gloom and despair, fearing she would live all her days possessed by these demons.
And then she met Jesus. In Mark 16 we read that Jesus had driven out those demons. However he did that, it had to be dramatic, perhaps painful, but no doubt the best day of her life. She was set free from her past, her guilt, her shame.
And because Jesus is risen from the dead, he is able to do the same for you today. It may not be demons you are dealing with, but whatever it is in your past that haunts you, Jesus is a qualified Savior because he is risen from the dead, and he can deliver you, too.
We are told that Mary, his mother, was at the cross. No doubt as she stood there,
Of what or who do you boast? Or in our vernacular, what do you brag about?
Paul said to the Galatians: “May I never boast except in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, through which the world has been crucified to me, and I to the world” (Galatians 6:14). Can you imagine what this sounded like to Jewish people of that day? Boasting in the cross? That was unthinkable—and yet it is because of the cross that Jesus was able to purchase our salvation.
I have led many tours to Israel and each time I went to the Garden of Gethsemane, where Jesus spent those agonizing hours before he was arrested, I was reminded that it’s not a fairy tale, it’s not just a story that has been passed down through the ages. No, the cross of Jesus Christ was real. He suffered that shameful death for me—and for you—so that God could forgive our sins and we could have the righteousness of Jesus Christ credited to us and therefore making us eligible to spend eternity with God.
There’s something about sitting in that garden, still filled with olive trees, and knowing we are on sacred ground, walking and meditating there where Jesus agonized until his sweat was like drops of blood falling to the ground, praying “Not my will but thine be done,” as he faced the reality of being separated from his Father and bearing in his own body the sins of the world. Each time I came away from that Garden more humbled and more aware of just what it meant for Jesus to give himself a ransom for many—for me—and to be willing to die on a cross.
As you and I celebrate the resurrection of our Lord, let us glory in the cross, because without it, we have no hope. Boast about the cross and what Jesus has done for you. Tell everybody you can why this celebration is so vital and precious to you. And we will celebrate with great joy the fact that the grave could not hold Jesus; death had no victory over him. He arose from the grave.
What kind of god dies? Only the true God, the only God, who died so that we could live. Let it sink into your mind and heart as you stand in awe that Jesus died for you. Don’t ever take this story, this truth, for granted or allow it to become just another story. Understanding the enormity of his death on a cross is sobering and amazing, and it is reason for great joy.
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It’s really important to rehearse again this incredible truth that God, the Son, came to earth to die to pay the debt you and I owed—one we could never pay—for the forgiveness of our sins. And because Jesus died and then rose again after three days, he has conquered eternal death for us. If you have been born from above through faith in Jesus Christ, then your debt has been paid and that is the most amazing truth ever.
Think about the disciples as they were witnessing Jesus’ trial and crucifixion. No doubt they just could not comprehend how Jesus could come to this end. They believed he was their Messiah and he would save them from Rome, but instead he came to save them from their sins. But after the resurrection when the Holy Spirit came upon them, they finally understood and they were changed people.
In a statement to the Sadducees, who had just put him in jail for preaching the Gospel, Peter said, “The God of our fathers raised Jesus from the dead—whom you had killed by hanging him on a tree” (Acts 5:30). Peter points to the tree—the curse of the cross—and says that in spite of their intention to bring Jesus to disgrace, God raised him from the dead and reversed the stigma.
Paul went even further to show how the cross became their message. He said, “We preach Christ crucified: a stumbling block to Jews and foolishness to Gentiles, but to those whom God has called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God” (1 Corinthians 1:23-24). The fact that Jesus was crucified was a great stumbling block to Jews in that day. How could their Messiah die and on a cross of all things? And for the Gentiles—those who are not Jews—this idea of a god dying seemed foolish. There were lots of gods that were worshipped in those days. The Romans had false gods for every occasion. But none of their gods died by crucifixion! That was foolishness to them.
The amazing truth is that once the disciples understood the purpose of Jesus’ death on the cross, that very shameful act of being crucified transformed the disciples and their message, and the thing that once had been so repugnant to them became the thing in which they boasted.
And that is what we boast in this Easter season. Don’t let this celebration pass you by without taking time to remember again that Jesus set you free by dying for you and then rising from the tomb. And because of that, you are free indeed!
Resurrection Sunday is definitely the best day of the year, as we sing the glorious truth that Christ the Lord is risen! But back in the day, when the disciples were expecting Jesus to save them from Rome, they never expected him to die—and certainly not to die on a cross because that was cursed by God.
But it was totally necessary for Jesus to die if any of us could be forgiven. You see, even if each of us were to pay for our sins, we would simply die in our sins. We would pay the price—death—but there would be no redemption. Jesus paid the price for our sins. Because he was the perfect Son of God, he was qualified to die for our sins because he did not have to die for his own sins. He took our sins on himself and paid the price we could never pay so that those sins could be forgiven and we could have access to God through Jesus and his sacrifice.
Furthermore, the payment for sin had to come through the shedding of blood. Hebrews 9:22 tells us: “In fact, the law requires that nearly everything be cleansed with blood, and without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.” So, the death that Jesus died had to be one where his blood was shed; it could not be a bloodless death. The cross was God’s choice for the death of his Son—the shameful cross—because in that way his blood was shed, and Jesus took that curse that we deserved and paid the penalty that we owed. Galatians 3:13 says, “Christ redeemed us from the curse of the law by becoming a curse for us, for it is written: ‘Cursed is everyone who is hung on a pole.’”
The good news is that even though the wages of sin is death, the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord (Romans 6:23). It’s good for us to get a renewed and deeper understanding of why Jesus died and why he died on a cross.
As clueless as the disciples were while Jesus was with them, once they “got it,” once they began to see why Jesus came to die and why he died on a cross, and they saw that he triumphed over death and rose from the grave, then when they were indwelled with the Holy Spirit at Pentecost, their whole attitude toward the cross changed. Their hopes were dramatically restored and they had unshakable faith in their crucified risen Messiah.
Have you ever asked yourself this question: What kind of god dies? Jesus kept telling his disciples that he came to die, he came to deliver them from their sins not from Rome. But they just couldn’t hear it. After all, what kind of god dies?
If I had been in the shoes of those disciples at that time, I’m sure I would have struggled with understanding that the Messiah—the one I had faithfully followed for over three years, the one I hoped was going to redeem Israel from Rome—this Jesus was going to die on a cross under God’s curse. No doubt they knew the passage from Deuteronomy 21:23 which says that “anyone who is hung on a tree is under God’s curse.”
When Pilot ordered Jesus to be crucified, the Jewish leaders were very pleased for no doubt they thought this would be the end of this troublemaker and his followers. Surely those pesky disciples would give up after Jesus was hung on a cross. This helps us understand why the disciples went into hiding after the crucifixion and were frightened that they would be found out. They were bearing not only the grief of losing Jesus, but the shame and disgrace of the way he was killed—on a cross.
A crucified Messiah was not their idea of a hero, a Savior, their hope. And up to the end they just couldn’t believe it—Jesus was going to be crucified on a cross? They must have wondered why God sent Jesus to die and why did he have to die on a cross? What kind of god dies?
Well, with clear hindsight now and with the New Testament to explain it to us, we can look back and see why God the Son had to die—and yes, even his method of death, a cross, was part of God’s plan. Remember, no one took Jesus’ life from him; he gave it. This was all part of God’s eternal plan, every detail of his death was predetermined by God.
The reason Jesus had to die was because sin has consequences and a holy God cannot just overlook sin. The price had to be paid for sin; this is what God declared. He does not ignore our sins, but he makes it possible for our sins to be forgiven in Jesus Christ. Of course, God also never intended for death to have dominion over Jesus. What a glorious truth!
I hope you have been preparing your heart to celebrate Resurrection Sunday, for it is truly the most important celebration for us as Christ-followers. And in preparation, I’d like us to focus on a very unusual question, which is: What kind of god dies?
If you or I were given the assignment to determine how the sins of mankind could be forgiven, would we ever have come up with a plan that God becomes man and dies? The disciples certainly had difficulty hearing Jesus when he repeatedly told them that he had come to die, not to get rid of the Roman rule in Israel and establish himself as the ruler. Even though there were many clues and prophecies from the Old Testament showing that the coming Messiah would die, their belief at the time was that Jesus was Messiah and he had come to save them from Rome, not from their sins.
I’ve been trying to put myself in the shoes of those disciples as they grappled with Jesus’ mission. Clearly Jesus told them, “the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many” (Matthew 20:28). He told them that he was the Good Shepherd and the good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep. He even gave them an indication of the kind of death he would die when he said, “Just as Moses lifted up the snake in the wilderness, so the Son of Man must be lifted up” (John 3:14). But they just couldn’t hear it because what kind of god dies?
Only the true eternal God would have put this plan in place. To send his only Son who was equal with God the Father for the purpose of dying could only come from the mind and heart of God himself.
Then think of this—the way Jesus died was not only the most painful and horrendous way to die; the Jews considered that any crucified person was condemned by God. Don’t you imagine that in those early days following the crucifixion, the disciples were struggling to understand why Jesus had to die, and why he died on a cross? He died this ignominious death and all along they thought he was from God—which of course he was—but how could he be from God and die on a cross?
(as presented by Lisa Bishop)
When you think about fear, what are you most afraid of?
Fear has been defined as an intensely unpleasant and distressing emotion aroused by impending danger, evil, pain, or suffering—whether the threat is real or imagined.
We have all experienced the nagging, afflicting and at times pervasive feeling of fear. Maybe you are in the grips of fear right now. Perhaps you are in debt and see no way out and you are afraid. Maybe you made a mistake at work or received a negative performance review and you fear being fired. Maybe it’s fear of the future. Or, you have applied for nursing school or an MBA program and you worry about whether or not you will be accepted. Maybe it’s fear that you have missed your calling or fear in trying to figure out what your purpose in life is. The future of a relationship or fear of feeling alone or being single. Fear of that secret sin being exposed. Maybe you are fearful for your kids, your marriage, your financial future. You fear pain, rejection, disappointment, failure, humiliation, you fear the unknow, of getting older, maybe even death.
There are plenty of things to cause us fear. We all experience fear.
So, how do we grow in our ability to face our fears and not be held captive by them? How do we develop an unwavering confidence in the face of fear?
Let me first say that fears will never go away. There will always be things that happen in our lives that lure us to fear, but as a follower of Jesus, there are things we can learn and remember when we are tempted to fear. Ways to grow in unwavering confidence.
What is unwavering confidence? Unwavering means marked by firm determination or resolution. It means persistent and unshakeable. Confidence means belief in the certainty of something, to trust. Confidence is a belief or conviction that an outcome will be favorable.
Notice that unwavering does not mean we will never experience fear. It has to do with our perspective and response in the face of it. And who or what we are putting our confidence in matters greatly. We can be tempted to misplace our confidence in ourselves, our achievements, abilities, performance. Whether or not we get that promotion or title at work. We can misplace our confidence in our own power, intelligence and strength, in our circumstances and in other people.
Now, being confident in those things is not wrong. But depending on and relying on anything other than Jesus as our ultimate confidence will make us vulnerable to wavering. So does that mean when your confidence and trust are in Jesus you will never waver? No, you are human. Yet, you can and should be growing in your reliance and dependance on Jesus. Growing your faith and trust in Jesus, as you continue to mature in your faith to the One who is faithful.
When it comes to unwavering confidence I am reminded of the story of Peter and the disciples in the midst of a storm. Remember that scene in Matthew 14?
Jesus had just performed the miracle of feeding 5000 people with just five loaves and two fish. After the 5000 men, as well as many women and children are miraculously fed, Matthew tell us what happens next. Immediately Jesus made the disciples get into the boat and go on ahead of him to the other side, while he dismissed the crowd. After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by himself to pray. Later that night, he was there alone, and the boat was already a considerable distance from land, buffeted by the waves because the wind was against it.
Shortly before dawn Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake. When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, they were terrified. “It’s a ghost,” they said, and cried out in fear.
But Jesus immediately said to them: “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.”
“Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.”
“Come,” he said.
Then Peter got down out of the boat,
In Romans 8 Paul tells us that those who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God, and because of that, we can cry, “Abba, Father.” We are permitted to call the God of creation by an intimate term, a family name, if you please—Abba, Father, Papa. He is our heavenly father, and he will never let us go.
I think of a friend of mine who never knew her father; he abandoned her before she was born. Others have fathers who simply neglected them, and still others have fathers who abused them. If that is true for you, your concept of a father is likely warped. But let me assure you that God is your heavenly Father, and he is perfect. Don’t transfer your negative experience with your earthly father to God, because you will then miss the joy of fellowshipping with him as Father, Abba, Papa.
I had a wonderful earthly father who never neglected me or mistreated me, but even he could not promise to never leave me. But my heavenly Father can say, “I will never leave you or forsake you,” and I have full assurance that he will always be with me. He will not let me go, and the same is true for you, if you are his child.
Let me close with these wonderful verses from Romans 8:38-39:
For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
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God will never let go of you! If you have accepted Jesus Christ as the Lord and Savior of your life, he is committed to you and will keep you for all eternity. Jesus said, “My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one can snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father’s hand. I and the Father are one” (John 10:27-30).
Maybe you’re thinking, “Yeah, but Mary, you don’t know what I’ve done. I’ve committed a sin, knowingly, and I’ve wandered far from God.” That may be sadly true, but it doesn’t change the promise that Jesus gave us. If—and that is an important “if”—you have truly been born from above through faith in Jesus Christ, you can’t even jump out of his hand. Your own disobedience and sin are not strong enough to break his grip on you.
I would remind you of David, a man after God’s own heart. You can’t go much further wrong as a believer than David did, committing adultery and murder. He tried to cover it up, to bury it and forget it, but until he confessed it and admitted his guilt, he was the most miserable person alive. That’s always true for a believer. If you are living in willful disobedience to God’s principles, as a true child of God, you will be more and more miserable until you come to full repentance. Read Psalm 51 to remind yourself of David’s agony because of his sin.
None of us escape the consequences of our sin, whether believers or not, but nothing can separate a true believer from God’s love. Not even our sin. I want to encourage you to come back to God with a repentant heart, with a commitment to forsake your sin and walk in his way, and he will restore to you the joy of your salvation, just as he did to David.
My own story corroborates this truth, for I foolishly chose to walk away from my commitment to God’s principles for a period of ten years—ten long years. It wasn’t ignorance, but it was a willful determination to run my own life and get what I wanted. I failed miserably in that endeavor, and at the end of my emotional and mental rope, I came back to God, truly repentant, and he has proven himself to be a God of great mercy and grace to me. That was over 38 years ago, and I can testify that God simply never let go of me. He let me run my own show, until I ran it into the ground, and then he restored me.
I shared the story of a boy who was rescued from the jaws of an alligator by a father who would not let go. And afterwards the boy showed with pride the scars on his arm where his father dug in and held on against a much stronger animal who was trying to devour his son.
Just as this young boy foolishly and ignorantly dove into the dangerous water where this alligator lived, we as children of God sometimes foolishly dive into dangerous situations, not knowing what lies ahead. The swimming hole of life is filled with peril and we forget that the enemy is waiting to attack. The Bible says that the enemy of our soul, Satan, prowls about like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Peter goes on to say, “Resist him, standing firm in the faith. . . And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast” (1 Peter 5:9-10).
If you feel like you’re in the alligator swamp right now and they’re ready to take you under, remember that God has said if you are called to his eternal glory in Christ, he will himself restore you and make you strong again—after you have suffered a little while. God is not going to let go of you.
But why does he allow us to suffer a little while? Unlike the story of the father who fought to save his son, God is not helpless against Satan. He could deliver us sooner rather than later, and we puzzle as to why he doesn’t, don’t we?
There are various reasons that God allows his children to endure suffering, but in every instance it is to bring us to maturity so that our lives will bring glory to God. In writing about suffering, James said, “Brothers and sisters, as an example of patience in the face of suffering, take the prophets who spoke in the name of the Lord. As you know, we count as blessed those who have persevered. You have heard of Job’s perseverance and have seen what the Lord finally brought about. The Lord is full of compassion and mercy” (James 5:10-11).
James reminds us that in retrospect, as we look back to the suffering saints of old, we consider them blessed who persevered through suffering, and he uses Job as an example. In other words, James says, “Get the big picture here. Look beyond your momentary pain and consider what God is doing through your suffering.”
Whether your suffering is a result of your wrong doing or someone else’s, or it’s just the hardships of life, it didn’t catch God by surprise, and he intends to use it for your good. He is not going to let go of you, so hang on and trust him. He is a trustworthy God.
Are you in a tough place right now? I want to encourage you to know that God will never let go of you. When we are born from above, the Bible teaches us that nothing can separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. God won’t let go of you!
Think of Elijah. You remember the story found in 1 Kings 18, where Elijah challenged all the prophets of Baal, with great courage, and their pagan gods could not deliver them. Elijah triumphed over all that evil, proving that Jehovah God was the only true god. It was an incredible victory.
But the very next day, brave Elijah becomes a coward, fearful of one woman, Jezebel, who has threatened to kill him. And he starts running for his life. Elijah no doubt would have been diagnosed today as having a deep depression, even as being deluded, as he ran for his life. But God didn’t let go, and with great patience and kindness, he nurtured him back to strength, taught him some wonderful lessons, and brought him out of that deep funk an even better man of God.
Are you there today? Has your faith failed you; are you full of fear? Are you in that kind of deep depression where everything looks hopeless, you feel worthless, and you’re sure that life is coming to an end—at least life with any meaning? I want to encourage you today to know that God won’t let go of you. He will patiently guide you back to wholeness, as he did with Elijah.
How did Elijah recover? He needed some rest and some nourishment, first of all. You know, when you are physically depleted, it will affect you spiritually and emotionally. So God put him in a quiet place for some rest and nourishment. Then he reminded Elijah of who God is, he helped him get beyond the pity party he was having, and then he sent Elisha to be his companion and co-worker.
God never let go of Elijah, and if you are his child, he will not let go of you. David wrote: “For in the day of trouble he will keep me safe in his dwelling; he will hide me in the shelter of his sacred tent and set me high upon a rock” (Psalm 27:5).
Years ago someone sent me this story, which illustrates a wonderful truth.
On a hot summer day in Florida, a little boy decided to go for a swim in the old swimming hole behind his house. He flew into the water, not realizing that as he swam toward the middle of the lake, an alligator was swimming toward the shore.
His father saw what was happening, and he ran toward the water, yelling to his son. The little boy made a U-turn to swim to his father. It was too late. From the dock, the father grabbed his little boy by the arms just as the alligator snatched his legs.
That began an incredible tug-of-war between the two. The alligator was much stronger than the father, but the father would not let go. A farmer happened to drive by, heard the screams, raced from his truck, took aim and shot the alligator.
Remarkably, the little boy survived. His legs were extremely scarred and on his arms were deep scratches where his father's fingernails dug into his flesh in his effort to hang on to the son he loved.
The newspaper reporter who interviewed the boy asked if he would show him his scars. The boy lifted his pant legs. And then, with obvious pride, he said, "But look at my arms. I have great scars on my arms, too, because my Dad wouldn't let go."
Maybe you can identify with that little boy. You have scars, too. Not from an alligator, but the scars of a painful past. Some are unsightly and have caused you deep pain or regret. But some wounds are because God has refused to let go. In the midst of your struggle, he's been there holding on to you.
Think of Joseph. His brothers sold him into slavery in Egypt. Joseph didn’t deserve to be so terribly mistreated, but there he was, a slave and a prisoner in Egypt. But God never let go of Joseph, because Joseph never forsook his faith in Jehovah God. And he was used by God to deliver many people, including his own family, from starvation. I wonder how many times, as he sat in that prison, he just wanted to give up. It looked hopeless, but God didn’t let go.
If you’re in what looks like a hopeless situation right now, remember that God is not going to let go of you, if you are his child by faith in Jesus Christ. God won’t let go of you!
Have you ever worked with someone who was always totally negative? If ever there was a toxic personality type, it is the person who never sees anything good in anyone or anything. How are we supposed to deal with the really negative co-worker?
Well first, you will have to pray for the desire and the power to put on compassion toward that person. It will have to be God working in you to make you want to be kind to them and have compassion on them, but that is certainly important.
Some kind words spoken to that negative person might be the key to getting him or her to get past that negativity and become more positive. However, consider this verse as given to us by wise Solomon:
Proverbs 23:9:
Do not speak to fool, for he will scorn your prudent words.
There are people who are committed to being negative, and nothing is going to move them from that position. To try to change them is futile and indeed that person will treat you with scorn. So, there are times that you cannot have a positive effect on a negative person, regardless of how kind your words may be or how good your motives are.
Whatever you do, don’t allow that negative person to drag you down to negative territory. Change the subject, walk away if possible, avoid the negative person where you can, but don’t catch their toxic disease!
As we examine our relationships with difficult people, we have to recognize that the problem may not always be the other person's. There are times that we Christians can be lazy, arrogant, domineering, vindictive, and/or negative. It would do us all good to take a close look at each of these and ask the Holy Spirit to reveal to us if we're guilty of any of these difficult characteristics in our relationships with our co-workers.
First Peter 2:12 reminds us to:
Live such good lives among the pagans that, though they accuse you of doing wrong, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day he visits us.
Remember: this chapter on dealing with difficult people from my Bible study, Improving Your Relationships, is available for you.
Please click here to download your free chapter.
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If you’ve ever had to work with a person who was vindictive or hostile—or both—then I don’t have to tell you how difficult that can be. I’m talking about relationship problems on the job, where we sometimes encounter people who are challenging, to say the least. And the vindictive, hostile co-worker is a huge challenge. This type of person can be malicious, even vicious, and he or she may try to cause us problems and do us harm.
Jesus came to bring true light to the world, and when we become believers, he says that we are the light of the world (Matthew 5:14). We become the bearers of his light into a very dark world. That is a great privilege, but it comes with its "downside," if you please.
In John 3:19-20, Jesus says:
This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but people loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed.
And again, in John 15:18-19:
If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first. If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you.
Jesus gives us clear warning of relationship problems that we will incur simply because we are believers in him and carry his light into our dark worlds. Therefore, we should not be shocked to discover than on occasion our Christian "light" will generate a hostile response from a co-worker. The reason for this unpleasant reaction is the fear of exposure.
However, not always is a hostile person reacting to our Christian “light”; some people are simply hostile and vindictive in general toward most everyone. You have to realize that something has happened to that person to make them so miserable, and that’s when you ask God to help you see them the way he sees them, so that you can have compassion and mercy on them.
We are offering a free resource to help you navigate your difficult relationships. It's a chapter from Mary's Bible study, "Improving Your Relationships."
Please click here to download your free chapter.
Have you ever worked with or for someone who had delusions of greatness? I’m talking about dealing with toxic and difficult people on the job. Most of us have run into the person who was domineering and controlling—or trying to be.
Dealing with a Domineering Co-worker
These domineering types seem to assume that they have a right to manage other people, even though they had not earned the position of manager. How should a Christian respond to this person when you’re face-to-face with him or her every day?
We always want to look for biblical principles that apply to our relationship issues. The Bible gives us important foundational guidelines that should govern our responses to difficult people. And one of those principles is to humble ourselves. Sometimes God brings people into our lives for the purpose of teaching us to practice his principles, and there’s no question that a domineering person can really bring out the worst in us.
In responding to a domineering person who is trying to run your life, tell you what to do, and generally control you, here are some responses that would be a way for you to humble yourself:
Refrain from any verbal response. Just hold your tongue and don’t say the angry words you started to say. Be willing to do what they ask/demand, even though you may not be required to do so. I don’t mean that you always jump through their hoops, but on occasion God may direct you to be in submission to them and do it their way. Respond in a quiet, controlled manner. This is always a Christ-like response.
There may be times when you simply explain that you’re not able to do what they ask, in cases where they have no authority over you but simply want to boss you around. But one thing for sure, and that is don’t join in any gossip or character assassination of this co-worker.
We are offering a free resource to help you deal with the difficult people in your life. It's a chapter from Mary's Bible study, "Improving Your Relationships."
Please click here to download your free chapter.
I’m addressing how to deal with difficult and toxic relationships on your job taken from my Bible study, Improving Your Relationships. In the thirty-seven years of this ministry, the one issue which surfaces again and again is problem relationships. If we just didn’t have to deal with people, life would be easy! Linus put it so well when he said, “I love mankind; it’s people I can’t stand!”
We’ve talked about dealing with the lazy co-worker. Now I would like to address:
Dealing with a Condescending, Arrogant Co-worker
If you have ever worked with this type of person, you’ll recognize their characteristics. They talk down to people, they are unteachable because they know it all, they have an attitude of superiority and no matter what you’ve done or where you’ve been, they can top you with their story. Frequently their body language and facial expressions indicate aloofness, disgust, disapproval, and they treat others as though they are dumb or stupid.
When people have a continual attitude of arrogance and condescension, it is a telltale sign that underneath that intimidating outward appearance lies a great deal of insecurity and pain, and it reveals a lack of confidence, a need for recognition, and a fear of rejection.
There are times when the extra-mile principle is the one God would have you practice, just bearing with that arrogant person, not being intimidated by their behavior, but trying to ignore it as much as possible. Then you may need to speak the truth in love to that condescending co-worker, when God gives you the green light to do so. Certainly, God could use this person in your life to teach you to humble yourself, for they can be humbling.
My Bible study goes into these various toxic and difficult people you may have to deal with in more detail.
Please click here to download your free chapter.
Are there any toxic people in your life? Toxic people are those who live and behave in such a way that they spread poison throughout a home, an office, a factory, a church—wherever they spend much time.
I want to talk about the toxic people that may be in your life—specifically on your job—and how you should deal with them. The Bible warns us about such people, referring to them in many cases as fools or foolish people. Sometimes we need to confront these people, sometimes we simply should avoid them, but we should also try to understand them and if possible, help them.
Dealing with the Lazy Co-worker
One of the more common types of difficulties we encounter with co-workers is the person who is lazy and doesn't pull his or her share of the workload. Have you ever worked with someone who fits this description? If so, you probably felt a lot of resentment and anger toward that person, and you were tempted to talk about that person in derogatory ways, make sarcastic remarks to him or her—and in general find that person a real thorn in your flesh!
You’ve probably noticed that the Bible doesn’t have a chapter on “dealing with difficult co-workers or managers,” but there are biblical principles which can be directly applied to this lazy co-worker or to anyone who is difficult.
Please realize that God’s principles may be far more than you would ever do on your own, and even more than your employer requires of you. God’s principles are higher, and we are held to a more righteous standard. The good news is that he empowers us to do what he requires us to do, by the Holy Spirit within us.
There are times you need to speak the truth in love to that lazy co-worker. That is far better than talking behind her back or harboring anger toward her. Before you can speak the truth in love, your motive has to be right.
I have written a Bible study on relationships, and one chapter goes into depth on how to deal with toxic or difficult people. We will be glad for you to have that chapter as our gift, if you will be willing to work through it and truly ask God to teach you how to deal with the difficult and toxic people in your life, even the lazy co-worker.
Please click here to download your free chapter.
Fran works as a project manager for a marketing company, and she is responsible to secure new clients and then manage their projects to completion. Today we find Fran finishing a conversation with one of her clients. "Yes, Marge, I will do my very best to have that ready by tomorrow. Uh-huh, yes, I understand. Okay, Marge, I'll talk to you tomorrow.” Fran hangs up the phone and begins talking to herself, forgetting for a moment that Jesus, of course, hears everything she says or thinks.
"I don't believe that woman. She is going to drive me nuts! Nothing we do is good enough for her. She makes last minute changes and then expects me to work miracles. And she is so rude. I really can't stand her!"
Quietly she can sense the Spirit of God whispering to her: "Did you ever think that I love her as much as I love you?"
The thought startles her. "Well, yeah sure I knew that” she thinks out loud. “You love everybody, Lord. But she's a really nasty, demanding person. I'm sorry; I just don't like her."
As these thoughts continue, her mind goes back to a recent sermon she heard where her pastor said that there were people Jesus didn’t like, but he loved everybody. He had said that you don’t have to like everybody, but our commandment is to show God’s love to everybody.
"I thought you have to like someone, then you can love them,” Fran says to herself, “but I guess that’s not the way it is with God. The problem is, I just don’t know how to do it. There's just no way I can love Marge. She's obnoxious!”
"Do you want to love her?" again that quiet voice of Jesus catches her up short.
"Do I really want to love her? Tell you the truth—not really," Fran admits. “I guess that's where my problem lies, isn't it Lord? But how can I even want to love someone like her?" Fran exclaims.
As she sits and thinks about that, Jesus says to her, “You can want to love her simply because you want to please me. I can help you love her. Why don’t you begin by praying for Marge every day?”
“Pray for Marge every day?” Fran repeats. “Really—will that make a difference?”
Jesus says, “It will make a difference in you, and that’s what is important.”
So, Fran determines to pray for Marge as Jesus has challenged her. Now she begins to do the work she promised Marge tomorrow, working diligently to get it perfect, because Marge is very demanding.
The next morning Fran is driving to work and praying for a lot of people, as she often does, and Marge comes to mind.
"I'd like to pray that lightning will strike her," Fran says with a grin, knowing that she halfway means it. But she attempts to pray for her, "Dear Lord, please help Marge to see how obnoxious she is and change the way she treats me.” Her prayer bounces off the car ceiling; she knows it's the wrong prayer.
"Pray that Marge will change?” Jesus says to her. “That’s not exactly how you should pray for her, Fran.”
“But Lord, she should change. Her behavior is awful," Fran defends herself.
Her spirit is uneasy. Somehow, she has to get beyond this selfish kind of praying, even though Marge is difficult. She can’t change Marge; she can only change herself.
"Well, what should I pray?" Fran finally asks.
And then she thought of something she heard on the radio—praying that she could see Marge the way God sees her. Praying for a new frame for Marge, a new way to see her, by putting her in a different frame.
"Put her in a different frame,” Fran thinks. “I guess I can do that, but she really is obnoxious.” As she drives along, she thinks about that further. “I guess I’ve had her in the obnoxious frame too long. Maybe I should pray for a new frame for Marge—a new way to look at her.”
So, even though she feels a little foolish and not totally sincere, in obedience Fran starts her prayer again: "Dear Lord, please help me to see Marge the way you do. And please give me a new frame to put her in. There's got to be something good about her, Lord.
Have you ever met an adult who was childish? A person who is supposed to be grown up but yet behaves in childish ways is not someone we admire. Yet, many Christians have never grown up in their faith and their walk with God has many childish characteristics.
Peter wrote: “Like newborn babies, crave pure spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow up in your salvation, now that you have tasted that the Lord is good” (1 Peter 2:2-3).
But in Hebrews we read: “Anyone who lives on milk, being still an infant, is not acquainted with the teaching about righteousness. But solid food is for the mature, who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil” (Hebrews 5:13-14).
How would you describe faith that lives on milk? Well, these types of Christians are those who run from one person to another, one church to another, one event to another, looking for a new experience or seeking Christian entertainment. They want easy-to-digest teaching rather than in-depth study of God’s Word.
Another trait of childish faith is that is rooted in emotionalism instead of being rooted in truth. Emotions are fine; they are God-given gifts that we need. But if your faith is based on your feelings, it is a childish faith. It runs hot and cold, just like your feelings do. Childish faith is often a roller-coaster ride—up one day, down the next.
Christians living on milk are those who have no structured Bible study plan in their lives. They are no further in their walk with God this year than they were last year.
Immature, childish faith is characterized by being easily discouraged and giving up quickly. It expects to be served rather than to serve. Childish faith expects the church to meet its needs, instead of looking for ways to minister to others.
The Apostle Paul said that when he became a man, he put away childish things. I urge you to seriously pray for a childlike faith, and dedicate yourself to putting away the childish things. You don’t want to stay in that childish mode. I’m sure you want to grow up in Christ to full maturity and have a faith that has wonderful childlike qualities but is not childish.
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Let’s enumerate some childlike traits that are so appealing:
Childlike Trust
Children are naturally trusting. They believe you when you make a promise to them.
Childlike Innocence
Children will believe in things that adults find foolish. They have no difficulty believing in miracles. They have not become cynical or double-minded, but in their innocence, they believe fully and without hesitation.
Childlike Acceptance
If you offer a child a gift, they gladly and quickly accept it with great enthusiasm and joy.
Childlike Thankfulness
Children have no problem giving thanks for the ordinary things of life. Their prayers are full of thankfulness for dogs and clouds and their friend next door and new shoes.
Childlike Lack of Concern
You won’t find many children worrying about the future. For the most part, they live in the moment and enjoy it to the fullest. They don’t borrow trouble from tomorrow.
Examine your own walk with the Lord and ask yourself if you have the kind of childlike faith that Jesus said we all must have.
Do you trust the Lord, regardless of what your eyes and ears may tell you? Have you learned to turn your doubts and unanswered questions over to him and simply trust? Maybe you have mistakenly thought that God was like your earthly father, who was not trustworthy, or some other authority figure in your life who has failed you. Is your faith an innocent one, taking Jesus at his Word? Or are you too worldly-wise and sophisticated to believe Jesus? Can you accept the gifts God gives you with a thankful heart and great joy, knowing that it comes from the Father’s heart? Or do you try to repay God, to perform in order to gain his approval and his blessings? Are you aware each day of the daily blessings of your life? Do you live in daily thankfulness because of your daily blessings, or do you take them for granted? Can you in childlike faith let go of your worries about tomorrow and cast all your care upon the Lord? Or do you carry that heavy burden around with you all the time?
Is your faith childlike? Pray for childlike faith.
We know from Scripture that without faith it is impossible to please God. And the kind of faith that pleases God is childlike faith. Frequently our faith is more childish than it is childlike. Our challenge is to nurture childlike faith and eliminate childish faith.
There are many examples in Scripture of childlike faith. Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego demonstrated childlike faith when they were facing that fiery furnace. They told King Nebuchadnezzar, “If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to deliver us from it, and he will deliver us from Your majesty’s hand. But even if he does not, we want you to know, Your Majesty, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up” (Daniel 3:17 – 18).
In childlikeness, these grown men, who were among the most intellectual and educated men of their time, chose not to concern themselves with the great matter of how God would deliver them from the furnace. They neither went into panic mode, nor into denial about the furnace in front of them.
They recognized the reality of their predicament, and then, without questioning or complaining or worrying, they chose to trust God in an uncomplicated, simple way. That is childlike faith.
Think of the centurion who approached Jesus about healing his servant. Think about Jairus, the ruler of the synagogue, who asked Jesus to come heal his daughter. Think about Peter stepping out on the water to walk to Jesus. Their faith was childlike. They had no regard for what others thought about them nor did they worry about looking foolish.
In Luke 7 (verses 1-10) we read about the Roman Centurion who asked Jesus to heal his sick servant. Here was a Roman soldier who demonstrated great faith in Jesus, believing that he could heal his servant by just speaking a word, without even seeing the servant.
And when Jesus heard this, he said, "I tell you, I have not found such great faith, even in Israel” (Luke 1:9b). Jesus was amazed at his faith. It was a childlike faith, unconcerned about what others would think and willing to humbly ask Jesus to do what he could not do.
Ask yourself: Is my faith childlike or childish?
Is your faith childlike or childish? Jesus called a little child to him one day, and then said to his disciples: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven” (Matthew 18:3). But the Apostle Paul wrote: “When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me” (1 Corinthians 13:11).
In reading Philip Yancey’s book, Reaching for the Invisible God, I was struck by his thoughts on childlike faith versus childish faith. He writes, “Somehow we must learn to distinguish between appropriate child-like behavior, a prerequisite for the kingdom of heaven, and inappropriate childish behavior, a mark of stunted growth” (page 214).
David gives us some insight into this in Psalm 131. He says, “I do not concern myself with great matters or things too wonderful for me. But I have stilled and quieted my soul; like a weaned child with its mother, like a weaned child is my soul within me” (Psalm 131:1b-2).
And so, a childlike faith is one that does not complicate issues. One that takes God at his word, even when failing to comprehend it. A childlike faith is unconcerned with all the details that are God’s responsibility, and rests in the assurance that the Heavenly Father has promised to supply all our needs.
For those of us who have raised children, we can easily distinguish childlike behavior from childish behavior. When our children are doing childlike things, we find them endearing, lovable. Those are the things we put in the baby book and tell grandma and grandpa. Childlike behavior is a beautiful part of the maturing process.
Childish behavior, on the other hand, is not so attractive. Those are the traits and characteristics we dutifully try to eliminate through teaching and correction.
We want to develop a childlike faith and eliminate a childish faith. Our Lord is looking for grown-up people with childlike faith. Does that describe you?
(As Presented by Lisa Bishop)
A few weeks ago I was meeting with a young girl in her 20’s. As we sat together over a cup of coffee I asked her, “How is your faith these days?” As the Director of Women’s Ministry at a church in Chicago I have the privilege of meeting with several women throughout the year. Single women, married women, moms, women in their 20’s, 30’s, 40’s. And whenever I meet with them, I always ask the same questions.
How are you doing spiritually, mentally, emotionally and physically? How is your faith these days? What is an area of your life or character that you sense the Holy Spirit highlighting that he wants to transform?
How would you answer those questions?
As you can imagine the answers I receive vary and can be answered differently by the same person depending on the season in their life. That is certainly true for me. Yet at the same time the responses I often receive can hold a common theme, particularly when women are struggling in their faith. When a woman admits that she is struggling, I will always ask her, “How is your time with the Lord? How often are you spending time in God’s Word, being present to the Holy Spirit and abiding in Jesus?” Not surprisingly when a woman is feeling distant, despondent and discouraged in her faith, the time she has been spending in the Word meditating on truth …is slim.
Now this isn’t a guilt trip or any level of accusation, it’s just…. true. That doesn’t mean that if you have consistent quiet times with the Lord you will be free from struggle, doubt, and trouble. I can attest to that!
But when you invest time daily, when you make it a practice, when you create habits of abiding in Jesus through reading and memorizing his Word, prayer, stillness, worship - when you practice these things and the difficult times come when your faith is rocked and challenged, you will have a firmer foundation to stand on as you weather the storms and disappointments in your life.
If you are not spending time in the Word of God, the truth of God and his character will not be etched in your mind and heart. If you are not spending time in God’s Word, and in prayer and simply enjoying his presence, you won’t remember the Scriptures to call on in times of hardship, you won’t be able to bring to mind God’s character. And knowing and remembering God’s faithfulness and character is what will help you to cling on to your faith.
There is a very dear friend of mine who I have gotten to know over the past two years. She has been married for ten years and has three kids. She is in a really horrible marriage. At a time when her faith was weak she wandered away from Jesus and started dating a man that was not a follower of Jesus. Three children later and her husband is still not a follower of Christ. It is making for a really hard and painful marriage. She has a lot of regret for the decisions she made in the past and as she says… she is experiencing the consequences. And yet… she knows that God is still faithful. To watch her go through marriage trials and maintain her love for and faith in the Lord is truly inspiring. She is one of the most faith-filled joy-filled people I know. She trusts God. Her faith in him and in his character is immovable. Her faith reminds me of 1 Peter 5:7 - Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.
In faith, my friend continues to give her hardships and worries to God because she knows his character. She knows he cares.
Are there any worries or cares that you are holding onto and not bringing to the Lord? When you come to him he will not neglect you. You can trust him to care for you because it is in his nature.
When life does not go the way you planned, and it is a far cry from what you dreamed, it can be tempting to blame and distance yourself from God. I see a lot of people walking away from their faith these days because they are disappointed with their life, and they blame it on God.
We are wrapping up our week on faith builders and so far we’ve talked about how trust, remembering, stillness, and minding your mind help you grow your faith. The final faith builder is community.
Hebrews 10:24-25 is a familiar passage that instructs us as it relates to community.
And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another….
Especially over these past two years, meeting together in person has been difficult. But as Scripture tells us, it is ever so important. After such a lengthy time of being isolated, it can be difficult to get the motivation to be in community.
But not only is it a biblical instruction, it is also better for our health, mental state and longevity.
You were not meant to do life alone. You are not meant to walk out your Christian faith alone. Companionship and community started with God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit in community with each other. We see the account of Adam and Eve in Genesis. God knew that it was not good for man to be alone so he created a helper, a companion for Adam. The point is, we need one another.
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10
Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.
Galatians 6:2
Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.
We are not meant to bear our burdens alone in isolation: we bear each other’s burdens which implies community.
When you surround yourself with people who have their minds and hearts fixed on Jesus it will help you build your faith and be more like Christ. Find friends who are faithful followers of Jesus by being a part of your local church, joining a Bible study or a Christian group that serves your city, town or neighborhood.
If you had been a part of one of those groups and are just a little rusty coming out of the past few seasons, take one next step to being in community. You need it, your faith needs it, and others will benefit from knowing you.
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Do you ever think about what you are thinking about?
We’re talking about five faith builders, and I want to talk about minding your mind as our fourth faith builder.
A recent study estimates that we have approximately 6000 thoughts a day. It is further estimated that 80% of our thoughts are negative. Our thoughts impact our lives. We become what we think about. Our thoughts about ourselves, about others, about God, turn into feelings and our feelings can influence and turn into behaviors. The thoughts we believe will determine how we live.
But here is the good news! You don’t have to believe every thought that enters your mind and you are not supposed to!
2 Corinthians 10:5 instructs us when it says:
We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.
To take captive means to capture, to gain possession or control. And we are instructed to take control of our thoughts because faulty thinking can seriously hinder our faith. So taking back control of our minds from captivity to lies and liberating them with the truth is essential to flourishing in our faith.
Romans 12:2 is another powerful instruction.
Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.
Minding our minds is serious business.
Try this exercise: for 10 minutes (or however long you need), write down every negative thought about yourself, others, and God that pops into your head. Don’t judge yourself for the thoughts; simply observe them and write them down. Once they are recorded, you can begin to examine them. You can bring your thoughts into the light. As you examine them ask yourself: Do they honor God? Are they aligned with truth? Look for Scriptures that replace the negative thoughts and ask the Holy Spirit to help you realign them to Jesus.
Only when we mind our minds can we capture our thoughts, correct them according to the truth in God’s Word, and be set free from the lies. Choose to bolster and strengthen your faith by making your thoughts truth filled and obedient to Christ.
There are five things that are essential to build and grow our faith. Trust and remembering are the first two. The third faith builder is a spiritual practice that has been essential to my faith and relationship with Jesus: Stillness.
It is difficult to find time to be silent and still in the age of technology. Statistics show that the average person or group can only bear 15 minutes of silence. Stillness challenges our addiction to busyness, amusement, and noise.
Silence and stillness are difficult because we are easily distracted. Silence asks for patience and waiting, and patience and waiting makes us uncomfortable. We feel unproductive and sometimes emotions or thoughts surface for us that we would rather consciously or unconsciously avoid by being busy and not being still.
If I am honest, sometimes it can be easier to scroll through Facebook or Instagram than to spend that time in stillness with God.
Psalm 23:1-3b
The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside still waters, he restores my soul.
Notice the still waters.
God invites us to take time to be still and experience his presence, his delight, his restoration, his refreshment. To come into his presence with no agenda other than the desire to delight in his presence as he delights in us. Not consuming more information but being consumed with the presence of God, the presence of the Holy Spirit.A lot of religions practice silence but what makes us unique as followers of Jesus is that we come and we are silent before the Lord himself. Our aim is not to empty ourselves as a form of self-actualization but to grow in our realization of our experience of the presence of Jesus.
Henry Nouwen, well known theologian says, “Silence is the furnace of transformation”
And Jan Winebrenner states, “The discipline of stillness, when exercised in faith and in the power of the Holy Spirit, will always yield fruit.”
Take time to be still before Jesus this week. Replace time in social media with a few minutes of settling into stillness and silence, allowing thankfulness to bubble up in you. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you center your mind and heart on him. When practiced in faith your life will be transformed and you will bear fruit.
I am talking about five faith builders. Five things that are essential to build and grow our faith. Yesterday’s faith builder was trust and today’s faith builder is, remember.
I don’t know about you, but I have a tendency to be very forgetful. Just the other day I was trying to get out the door for work when I started frantically looking for my car keys. I looked high and low and for the life of me I could not recall where I put them. I was going to be late for my meeting and not remembering where I put my keys put me in a panic. Have you ever been there? The point is, sometimes, we are forgetful.
That happens in our faith too. We can be so fixed on our current circumstances, and especially when things are not going the way we planned, we forget God’s faithfulness. In challenging times, we can fail to recognize that the God who was with us before is still present amidst our current hardship. We get spiritual amnesia.
I am reminded of Psalm 103 where King David instructs his heart to remember.
Let all that I am praise the Lord; with my whole heart, I will praise his holy name. Let all that I am praise the Lord; may I never forget the good things he does for me.
David is preaching the truth to himself. He is remembering.
Because I know I am prone to forget, one thing I started doing at the beginning of the year is journaling. I divide the page into three sections - gratitude, confession, and prayer. In the first section I write down all of the things I am grateful for as I reflect on the previous day and how I experienced God at work. Reflecting on the day that has passed I ask, Lord, show me where you were at work in my life. In what ways did I experience your goodness and where did I hear you speak? And then I begin to write what comes to my mind and heart. When I take time each morning to reflect and record all of the ways I experienced Jesus and his blessings of the prior day, I am reminded of God’s faithfulness and my faith grows.
So, if you want to grow your faith, practice remembering. Consider taking a few minutes at the start or end of each day and recount and record all of the ways you experienced God’s blessings and goodness.
There are five things that are essential to build and grow your faith. The first faith builder is trust.
Several years ago I was on a company retreat at a camp in Lake Geneva. One day we did some team building activities. One of the activities was something called the trust fall. Picture climbing up a set of stairs and standing on a wood base, turning around and then falling backwards off of it hoping that the people below you catch you…. so, you don’t end up falling 10 feet and landing on the hard ground. (I still get a little anxious just talking about it). When it was my turn to fall, I really had to assess; do I trust my teammates to catch me? If I am honest, I was nervous. Willingly falling backwards 10 feet off the ground, with my arms crossed and eyes closed didn’t exactly seem like a great idea, but I did it and my team came through. They broke my fall and thankfully I ended up in one piece unharmed. It required trust.
When it comes to our faith, trust is essential.
Every day challenges can test our trust in God. Fear and anxiety can rob us from faith. The future may seem uncertain, and worry may be trying to take up room in your heart and in your mind, but this is when we need to remind ourselves of God’s character. That Jesus is faithful and trustworthy.
When your faith feels weak, remember the words in Isaiah 26:3.
You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you.
And Hebrews 12:2
Keep your eyes fixed on the author and perfector of your faith….Jesus.
Building your faith in God requires spending time with Jesus.
Your faith is not built in the battle it is built in your consistent relationship with God - spending time with him consistently, not occasionally.
How has your time with Him been? My trust and faith in the Lord grows exponentially when I take time to be in his Word, to pray, and journal. Sometimes I will put on some worship music and praise him. I’m not sure what season you are in but remember that Jesus is trustworthy. Take time this week to thank him for his faithfulness. Declare your trust in him. Say, “Jesus, I trust you! Thank you that you are faithful. Help me to grow my faith in you no matter my circumstances because I know you are with me and you are for me. When I feel like I am falling or my faith is wavering, help me to trust in you.”
I'd like to look at three different kinds of miracles we see in the Bible, to help us to be more aware of God’s miracles in our lives.
First, let me remind you about the widow at Zarephath. You’ll find her story in 1 Kings 17. She needed a miracle. She was down to nothing to eat; all she had was a handful of flour in a jar and a little oil in a jug. Her plan was to make one loaf of bread from this, and then die. But Elijah was sent by God to perform a miracle for her.
In order to receive her miracle, this widow had to give away what she had. She had only one loaf of bread and Elijah asked her for it. He promised her that if she would give away the little she had, God would keep filling up her flour jar and her oil jug. She obeyed and that's exactly what happened. Every time she would go back to that flour jar, it would be full of flour, and the same with the oil. She would use all she had, but the next time she went back, there was more.
You see, some miracles are that way. God just makes what we have go a long way. Obviously, Elijah could have performed another kind of miracle and given her tons and tons of flour and oil at one time. But that's no greater miracle than keeping her jar and jug continually replenished. And it meant she had fresh flour and oil all the time. Besides, she had to learn to trust God every day, didn't she? Every day when she went back to the jar for flour, which she knew was empty yesterday, her faith was tested. Would there be flour for today? But there was, every day.
Maybe that's the kind of miracle you need today—to trust God just for today's needs. Perhaps you've been wanting him to shower you with a year's supply of miracles, when he knows it would be best to give it to you a day at a time. Or maybe you haven't been willing to give away what you have. You know, we reap what we sow, so whatever you need, sow those seeds. This widow needed food, so she gave away the little food she had. Then God performed a miracle for her.
Did you ever have a pair of shoes that wouldn't wear out? Or maybe a car that kept going and going, even though you expected it to fall apart at any time? Sometimes God sends us miracles of this nature.
Think about the children of Israel during their forty years in the desert. In Deuteronomy 29 we read that during those years their clothes did not wear out, nor did the sandals on their feet. Can you imagine a fabric or shoe that would last for 40 years? If you wore the same thing every day, how long would your clothes or shoes last? Maybe a year or two, but not 40.
They needed a miracle, and God gave it to them. Imagine the problems they would have had if their clothes and shoes wore out in the desert, and there was no way to buy or make new ones.
Now, God could have provided for their clothing needs by some other method. My guess is that with all the griping and complaining they did while in the desert, God knew that if he sent them new clothes, they'd complain that they didn't fit, or they wouldn't like the style or the color. That was their attitude toward the food God provided for them. I can imagine the Israelites took those clothes and shoes for granted, without realizing it was God's miracle that they didn't wear out.
What about you? Has God been providing that kind of miracle in your life and you haven't even recognized it? Or perhaps you haven't appreciated it and wanted some "new clothes and shoes" instead.
God performs miracles for us all the time, when we open our eyes to see. And he uses the type of miracle that is best for us. Doing it your way could be all wrong for you and cause lots of other problems. So, when God chooses to work this kind of miracle in your life—making what you already have last and continue to meet your needs—don't overlook it and be sure to be thankful. Just think where you would be if God didn't work that miracle for you.
In 1 Kings 17 we read of another kind of miracle,
We need faith to please God. But how can you get more faith? Well, it's not a pill you swallow and there are no shortcuts. Faith comes through hearing and obeying the Word of God.
Where are the holes in your faith? That's where you need an extra application of God's Word. Perhaps there is a fear that continues to haunt you. Dig into the Word of God and find the passages about fear. Write those Scriptures down; memorize them so that when your faith is weak, you can apply the Word of God directly to your unbelief, and your faith will increase.
Previously I mentioned the man in the Bible who came to Jesus to have his son healed. He said, "If you can..." and when Jesus confronted him with his unbelief, he admitted it. He said, “Help me, Lord, with my unbelief.” Jesus did and healed his son.
Now, if you met this man the next week and asked him, "Do you still believe Jesus has the power to heal?", his answer should be very confident. The "if you can's..." of his faith should be wiped out. If the man showed any hesitancy at all to believe in Jesus' power, we would wonder what was wrong with him. What does it take to make a believer out of you, mister?
Has that ever happened to you? God answers your prayer one day, meets your need, moves your mountain, but the next time you face a difficult situation, you have many doubts and uncertainties. Recalling how God has met your need in the past is one way to build your faith.
Faith begets faith. A growing faith comes through exercising the little faith you have today, asking God to help you overcome your unbelief, and then you'll have more faith for tomorrow.
Remember: without faith, it's impossible to please God. Keep asking God to help grow your faith—to help with your unbelief area. That’s how faith grows.
(Click here if you would like to read the entire week's message.)
Would you describe yourself as a person of faith? All of us need to be people of faith because without faith it's impossible to please God. So, that's why we're asking the question: What is faith and how do we get it?
Jesus said, "Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.” (Matthew 17:20b).
Have you ever stood in front of a mountain and commanded it to move? Is that what Jesus wants us to do? That sounds like mission impossible, doesn't it? Besides, why would we even want to move a literal mountain? That's not my problem. The mountains in my life are people and circumstances and money and stuff like that, how about you?
Jesus used mountains because mountains represent obstacles –big obstacles that stand in our way. And then he contrasts that huge obstacle with the smallest thing he could think of—a mustard seed. He says even if your faith is no bigger than a tiny mustard seed, you can use that little bit of faith to move a huge obstacle.
What is Jesus teaching us through this illustration? I think it's this: our faith doesn't have to be as big as our problem. God is perfectly capable and willing to move our mountains for us, however large and impossible they seem, if we can show him faith the size of a mustard seed.
That comes as great comfort to me because I know how tiny my faith often is. In some situations it's so tiny you can hardly see it. But when I come to God with my tiny, tiny bit of faith and say, "Lord, you see this mountain here. It is huge. I cannot move it and it is a major obstacle in my life. You've promised me to move my mountains if I have any faith at all to believe you. Well, here's my faith. It's about the size of a pinhead; not much at all. I can't boast of my great faith, but I bring you what I have and ask you to please move my mountain."
So, when you come with your puny little dab of faith and ask God to move your mountain, you're exercising faith in God, not faith in your faith! It is not your faith that moves the mountain; God moves the mountain. But he can't get to work on your behalf until you come with your thimble-full of faith and ask him to move it.
Remember this today: your faith doesn't have to be as big as your problem. Come with the little faith you have and ask God to move your mountain. Then, when he does, your faith will grow. That's the way it works.
I find that frequently my faith is like a roller-coaster: up and down. Some things are easier to believe than others. Some days are easier than others. Can you relate to that?
Well, interestingly there are many people in the Bible who struggled with the same thing. Abraham had faith to believe that God could give him a son in his old age and lead him to a promised land he had never seen. But he didn't have faith to believe God could deliver him from his enemies, so he lied about Sarah. Abraham had great faith in one area, and little or no faith in another.
I think of Peter who had enormous faith to step out of a boat and walk on the water to Jesus. But then that faith weakened as he looked at the waves beneath him, and he started to sink. Peter had great faith one moment and none the next.
When you read the Psalms, you realize that King David certainly had his share of the ups and downs of faith. He's full of praise and joy over a victory one day, and the next day he wonders if God has forgotten him and he's going to be killed. These examples tell me that it's possible to have some faith and some unbelief at the same time.
In Mark 9 we read about the man who brought his son to Jesus for healing and said, "...if you can do anything, take pity on us and help us.” "If you can?" said Jesus. "Everything is possible for him who believes.” Immediately the boy's father exclaimed, "I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!” (Mark 9: 22b-24). And in spite of the fact that the father's faith was tentative, Jesus healed his son.
Jesus didn’t tell this man, "Well, when your faith is perfect, come back and I’ll heal your son.” No, Jesus heard his confession of unbelief and his cry for help and healed his son.
Doesn't that encourage you? We don't have to have perfect faith in order to come to Jesus with our needs and requests. You can bring the little bit of faith you have and ask him to help you overcome the huge area where your faith is weak.
So, wherever your faith is weak today, confess it to the Lord and then ask him to help you there in that unbelief area. He will, and he'll honor the faith you exercise.
When you hear the word "faith," what is your reaction? The whole subject of faith can seem very obscure and fuzzy. However, since the Bible says that without faith, it's impossible to please God, we need to make sure we have it because we really want to please God, right? But how can you tell if you have faith? And what can you do to increase your faith?
The Bible gives us a definition of faith in Hebrews 11:1: "Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.” So, the first thing we hope for as Christ-followers is that we will spend eternity with Jesus in heaven because we’ve put our trust in him and him alone. That’s the first step of faith that is required in order to please God. Have you taken that step?
Then the Bible says, "…the righteous will live by faith” (Galatians 3:11). Paul wrote "For we live by faith, not by sight” (2 Corinthians 5:7). So, after you have placed your trust—your faith—in the redemption Jesus provides for your eternal salvation, you face this challenge of living by faith.
Now, in your faith journey, there are times when your faith is strong, and there are times when doubts arise. Doubt is the opposite of faith. You may have doubts about your relationship to God. Perhaps you look at your failures and wonder if God could continue to call you his child since you've failed badly. Maybe you doubt if God really hears your prayers. All of us have occasional doubts.
In James 1:7 and 8 we read: “That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do.” Doubt makes you double-minded and unstable. Double-minded means you believe God today and tomorrow you doubt. Then you become unstable, wobbly, ineffective, discouraged, unreliable.
It's obvious if you want to please God, you need to get rid of doubt. But just because some doubt enters your mind doesn’t mean you’ve lost your faith. It’s how you respond to the doubt that will determine whether that doubt takes over and makes you unstable, or whether you are victorious and your faith increases.
If you're like me, you want answers. I don't like unanswered questions, do you? I don't like loose ends and unfinished business. Yet life is full of them.
I'm sure many of you are in the midst of some situation for which you can find no answers. God is silent. The heavens are like stone. You've begged for explanations, but none have come. And your faith is beginning to weaken. What do we do when there are no answers?
Mary and Martha faced that dilemma when Lazarus died. You know the story. They sent for Jesus to come and heal Lazarus. They were confident that Jesus could heal him and prevent his death, and that he would do so, for they knew how Jesus loved Lazarus and them.
They sent out their cry for help, but we read in John 11:6 that "...when Jesus heard that Lazarus was sick, he stayed where he was two more days.” He loved them but he didn't come to their rescue. Why? I can see Martha and Mary waiting by the side of their sick brother, expecting Jesus to walk through the door any minute. They knew he could have been there shortly but as hour by hour passed, Jesus didn't show up. And Lazarus got worse and worse, and they watched him die.
Do you think they wondered if Jesus really loved them during that time? Don't you imagine they must have felt abandoned and forsaken by Jesus, to realize that he could have come and healed their brother, but he chose not to? Don’t you imagine that their faith took a beating during those hours and days when Jesus was a no-show? Have you felt that way? I think we all go through similar reactions when there are no answers.
When Jesus finally arrived, it was too late; Lazarus was already dead. Martha was upset with Jesus, and we read in John 11:21 that she said to him, "Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.” She asked him for an answer to her question: Why didn't you come, Lord?
I find Jesus' words to her at this time very interesting. He did not defend his actions; he did not say, "Martha, let me explain to you exactly what I did and why.” No, when Martha was looking for answers to her unanswered questions, Jesus took her back to basics.
Jesus said to her, "I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die; and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?” (John 11:25). He confronted Martha with the reality of who he was and caused her to change her thinking.
You see, if Martha believed that Jesus was the resurrection and the life and that because Lazarus had believed in him, Lazarus would live forever, then this temporary separation would look very differently to Martha. Jesus wanted her to think beyond the immediate and look at the eternal. He wanted her to think about who he was and what kind of power he had. And she confessed out loud, "Yes, Lord, I believe that you are the Christ, the Son of God, who was to come into the world."
When you don't have answers, stop and ask a different question: Who do you believe Jesus is? Do you believe that he is the resurrection and the life? If so, confess out loud exactly what you believe about the person of Jesus. It's important that you say it out loud, I think, so you can hear your own confession of faith.
We may never know some of the answers we're looking for this side of heaven, but we can always confidently know the answer to the question: Who do you think Jesus is? By concentrating your thoughts on who he is, you will have the peace and strength you need for those unanswered questions and your faith will remain strong even when you have no answers. If that was the question Jesus asked Martha when she wanted answers, then surely it is the starting place for us today when we want answers.
We all remember the end of this story; Jesus did meet their need by performing an incredible miracle and raising Lazarus from the dead. In this case, Mary and Martha finally got answers, as they saw their brother come forth after four da...
How long has it been since you had a checkup? Most of us are pretty good at making sure we have physical checkups regularly, but I’m talking about a spiritual checkup. So, I’ve suggested four examination questions which may be helpful in determining how healthy your faith is. They are:
Have you allowed the important daily disciplines of your life to fall away? Are you doing the good works God has for you to do? Are you showing the love of Christ as you should? Is your faith growing?
Here’s the final question:
Do you share your faith with others?
As Christ-followers, we believe that Jesus is the Way, the Truth and the Life and there is no other way to have a right relationship with God—right? So, if we believe that, it should be natural that we share it with others. We know that God does not wish that anyone should perish, and neither should we. Since truth sets people free and because we know this truth about Jesus, sharing that truth is one evidence that our faith is strong.
I’ve just finished reading the book, Not a Fan, where the author asks again and again if you are just a fan of Jesus Christ or are you a follower, truly a disciple. If you do not share your faith, is it because you fear persecution or rejection? If you believe the gospel is the only way to salvation and that others will be lost eternally if they do not accept it, that should urge you to share your faith with others. So, have you done that lately?
My former Pastor was and is very comfortable sharing with anyone anywhere. Taxi-drivers, someone sitting next to him on an airplane, the next-door neighbor—he simply never hesitates to ask appropriate questions and start a conversation about Jesus. I have to confess that I’m not as natural at that as he is but I realize it’s an area where I need to grow. And what I’ve discovered is that when I start a conversation about my faith with someone I may not know so well, it usually is not nearly as scary or as difficult as I thought it would be. I think we let our enemy cause us to fear sharing our faith and then we miss out on lots of opportunities.
So, I’m hoping you’ll look at these five questions I’ve asked and allow God’s Spirit to help you check up on yourself, make sure your faith walk is healthy and growing, to the honor and glory of our Lord Jesus Christ.
(Click here if you would like to print or download the entire week's devotional.)
Our fourth test question for is:
Is your faith—your relationship with God—growing?
You know, if your child didn’t grow as expected, you would be concerned. If a ten-year-old looks and acts like a five-year-old, you would be seriously worried, right? How do you think our Heavenly Father feels when we are spiritually way behind the curve? So, can you see areas of growth in your spiritual life? Can you actually identify areas where you are more like Jesus today than this time last year?
Second Corinthians 3:18 makes it clear that we should be in a growing process: And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit. Ever-increasing—that’s the key word there. A healthy Christ-follower should be able to name areas where they are growing. Take the fruit of the Spirit from Galatians 5:22-23a: But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Test yourself in each of these areas: Are you more loving, more joyful? Have you been more faithful, more gentle? Are you exercising more self-control? Further in Galatians 5 we read: “Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.” Are you “keeping in step” with God’s Spirit and growing more and more like Jesus? That’s a really good spiritual checkup question.
This is faith checkup week! I’m suggesting five ways to examine your faith—to see how healthy your faith is. I’m asking some incisive questions that may prompt you to consider whether you need some adjustments, some changes, some recommitment in some areas of your life.
Have you allowed the important daily disciplines of your life to fall away? Are you doing the good works God has for you to do? Are you showing the love of Christ as you should?
John 13:35 says,“ By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” And in 1 John 4:7-8, it is even stronger: Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. The kind of love this refers to is not necessarily warm, gushy feelings toward someone, but rather it is agape love—love that results in practical actions. First Corinthians 13:4-7 lists those love actions: Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Every time I read that description of love, I’m convicted because I know I lack some of these evidences at times. Like, love is not self-seeking. That means it’s not selfish. You love because God is love and you choose to love like he loves. And love is not easily angered—think of what easily angers you. That’s where you need to learn to show love.
So, take another look at this description of love, and ask God to reveal any areas in your life where you’re not loving like he wants you to.
We go to doctors for regular checkups—right—just to make sure nothing’s wrong. According to 2 Corinthians 13:5, we are to examine ourselves to see whether we are in the faith. It’s like a faith checkup. Here’s the second way to examine your faith:
Are you doing the good works God has for you to do?
Galatians 6:3-5 says: If anyone thinks they are something when they are not, they deceive themselves. Each one should test their own actions. Then they can take pride in themselves alone, without comparing themselves to someone else, for each one should carry their own load. So, what are the works you are doing in obedience to the Lord? This passage says we are to test our own actions—or examine our actions. We know from Ephesians 2:10 that “we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” What are the good works you are doing that God has prepared for you to do?
The works we are to do are part of the gifting God has given to us. For example, if God wants you to help people who are sick or disabled, you will most likely have the gift of mercy. That is what you need to do those kinds of good works. If he wants you to lead a worship team, then no doubt you have some musical gifting that enables you to do that good work. Part of the works God has for me is teaching and writing and speaking. Well, thankfully I love to communicate in these ways.
God would not have a good work for you to do that would be beyond your ability. Oh, for sure it will mean you have to work at it and develop your gifts and skills. But he will equip you to do the good work he has determined in advance for you to do.
So, are you sitting on the sidelines or are you actively doing the works God wants you to do? That’s a really good question to ask yourself as you examine your faith.
We have come through two years of the unknown like most of us have never experienced before. And the end is not yet in sight! How are we as believers in Jesus Christ navigating through these strange and difficult waters? Are we any better at it than others who don’t know Jesus as we do?
If nothing else, this pandemic and its many side effects have caused us to examine our faith, don’t you think? We read in 2 Corinthians 13:5: Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves. Do you not realize that Christ Jesus is in you—unless, of course, you fail the test? In the face of this uncertainty, this loss of hope, this new normal which we all find very troubling and hard, maybe it’s time to truly examine ourselves and our faith. So, this week I will give you five ways to examine your faith. I hope you will find it helpful. Here’s number one.
Have you allowed the important daily disciplines of your life to fall away?
I’m referring to everyday disciplines as well as spiritual disciplines. For example:
Are you getting up early and making a plan for each day? Days without discipline are discouraging. Recently I allowed a day to just get away from me. I sat and thought about all I had to do, but I didn’t do anything. By the end of the day I was grumpy, not joyful. I simply had abandoned a daily discipline of a regular routine with goals for the day. I find that even the small disciplines—like making your bed, dressing in a caring way, straightening up the house, eliminating clutter—they make a difference in your approach to your day and therefore in whether your day is well spent or not. How faithful have you been to stay focused on God’s Word and prayer? Is that a priority in your life? In fact, have you stepped up the time you spend in getting to know God and truly learning to pray? I have learned that if I allow this discipline to slip, it’s usually downhill for the rest of my day. It’s the essential one—the discipline that is foundational for all the other daily disciplines.
So, examine your faith by checking up on how you’re doing in the daily disciplines of life. It’s easy to let things slide when life is uncertain, and if that’s happened to you, you will benefit greatly by re-establishing those important daily disciplines.
There are few days in our lives that are guilt-free, and far-too-many of our days are filled with guilt. Life under a load of guilt is not the abundant life that Jesus came to give us. Guilt steals our joy, hinders our productivity, interrupts our peace, harms our relationships, and worst of all, makes us self-focused. Think about it—when you’re feeling guilty, you’re thinking about yourself; and I’ve learned that when I think about myself very much, it always leads to discouragement and despair.
Have you lived with guilt so long that it has become your daily companion and you no longer recognize its evil source and the harm that it causes? Little wonder that the enemy of our souls wields this weapon of guilt so broadly and with such effectiveness. He has long since recognized how easily we put up with guilt and how difficult it is for us to dump it. So, if he can keep us guilt-ridden, he keeps us from doing all the good things God planned in advance for us to do, as we read in Ephesians 2:10. He steals our joy, and the joy of the Lord is our strength.
While he may not be able to trip us up with some addiction or impurity or disgraceful public sin, it’s not that difficult to bombard our minds with guilt. Someone looks at us the wrong way and we take on guilt. One failure to jump through someone else’s hoop and we’re guilt-ridden. One memory of past sins and guilt moves in. But we often fail to see it as a tool of Satan because we feel like we deserve to feel guilty!
What is guilt?
Guilt is both a fact and a feeling. It is possible to be guilty without feeling guilty. It is possible to feel guilty without being guilty. And obviously, it is possible to be guilty and feel guilty. No doubt we have all experienced these three conditions.
Being guilty without feeling guilty can be due to ignorance. I may be guilty of breaking a law because I am ignorant of the law.
It is also quite possible to have a hardened heart that feels no guilt even when guilty. Hebrews 3:13 admonishes us not to be “hardened by sin’s deceitfulness.” I may drive at an excessive speed even though I know I am breaking the law without feeling a tinge of guilt because I’ve become hardened to breaking that law and it doesn’t make me feel guilty, even though I am.
Feeling guilty even when we are not guilty is a more common struggle for most of us. This false guilt is caused by wrong thinking. We feel guilty because we allow ourselves to think thoughts that tell us it is our fault, whatever “it” is. In this condition, we ignore the facts, we wallow in self-recrimination, and we send ourselves into a downward spiral of despair and discouragement without justification. That’s because this false guilt is a feeling, not a reality.
It has been said that feelings have zero I.Q. That means they’re not smart, and in dealing with my own feelings, I have found this to frequently be the case. My feelings can mislead me because they are often not based on reality. But feelings can be very strong and convincing, whether accurate or not.
It is not God’s will for us to live in guilt. Galatians 5:1 says, “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free; stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.” Living with guilt is living with a yoke of slavery. It is allowing those feelings of guilt to choke the very life out of you. And Jesus came to set you free from this yoke.
It’s time we start refusing to submit to the yoke of guilt. But, you’re thinking, that is easier said than done. Of course, it’s easier said than done! What isn’t? But that’s no excuse for not doing it! It is possible to learn to live without guilt! We have power to do it because we have God’s Spirit in us to empower us, providing of course, we have been born again into God’s family.
Dealing with True Guilt
True guilt is feeling guilty because you are guilty. That is what we feel when God is convicting us of some area in our lives that needs to...
Did you know that you were not designed to live without hope? The truth is, when you lose hope, you lose your motivation, your energy, indeed you can lose even your desire to live. But as Christians we have great hope because of Jesus, who died and rose again to purchase our redemption, so no longer are we destined to hopelessness.
But, many times we can forget that, as we live our daily lives and just live in the drudgery of life instead of in the glorious hope that we have in Jesus. It’s really easy to lose hope in this sin-infested world, isn’t it?
But God’s Word is full of hope for you if you’re a Christ-follower, and you can overflow with hope even in the midst of difficult circumstances. It begins as you learn to bring every thought into captivity and make it obey Christ. Hopelessness is in your mind, in your thought patterns. Negative thinking robs you of hope. Thoughts like: This will never get better. Or I’ll never be able to do this. Or Nobody cares. Or I might as well give up; nothing is working. Or. . . and on and on. Pity parties swoop in and take over and you become mired in negative thoughts.
It is difficult—I would say it’s pretty much impossible to have negative thoughts and be hopeful at the same time. So, how’s your thought life these days? Negative thinking will steal your hope.
I love this passage about Abraham:
Against all hope, Abraham in hope believed and so became the father of many nations, just as it had been said to him, “So shall your offspring be” (Romans 4:18).
Against all hope—in spite of the hopelessness of his situation—Abraham in hope believed. How could he become the father of a nation? He had no idea how—but against all hope Abraham in hope believed.
Don’t lose hope. Cling to the hope we have in Jesus and never give up.
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What is your hope quotient? Your hope quotient is more important than your IQ—your intelligence quotient. In his book, The Hope Quotient, Ray Johnston says that under every thriving person, every thriving marriage, kid and business is one factor: hope. And he points out that hope is so much more than a feeling; it is a decision you and I make regularly to do the things that build hope in our minds.
In Hebrews 10:23 we read: “Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful.”
If you have professed faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, your hope is invested in his promises, right? But you must hold to that hope; you have to hang on when things look hopeless. Could it be true that life has thrown some tough circumstances at you lately? Is your job turning out to be full of strife and uncertainty?
Recently a friend was telling me how her company encourages strong competition between coworkers, actually causing disharmony as a way to motivate their workers to work harder and longer. As a result of that work environment, everyone is under lots of stress and they are always uncertain of when the next shoe is going to fall.
Does that sound somewhat familiar to you? Or maybe it’s a relationship problem in your family, or financial stresses or you’re just weary of the never-ending push and pull of life. What is stealing your hope? What is causing you to feel hopeless?
Let me please encourage you to hold unswervingly—without giving up—to the hope you have professed because the God of hope is faithful. Put this verse—Hebrews 10:23—on a card and take it with you every day. Then when those feelings of hopelessness start to move in (and keep in mind, they are feelings, not truth), then read or quote the verse and tell the Lord, “I’m holding unswervingly to my hope in you.” Speak truth to yourself and trust the God of hope. He won’t fail you.
At least three times in the Psalms we read: “Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God” (Psalm 42:5). Can’t you see the Psalmist talking to himself—like he’s looking himself in the eyes and reminding himself: What’s the matter with you? Why are you so down? Just put your hope in God.
You see, when we lose hope it’s because we’ve taken our minds off our Savior and we’re focused on ourselves, our problem, our failures, our inability to make things right. So, if you need to nourish hope in your life, begin by quoting this verse from Psalm 42:5 – memorize it so it's right there ready when you need it. Then drive out all those wrong thoughts that are filling your mind with hopelessness by remembering the hope you have because of Jesus.
For example, suppose you’ve just given up hope that things are going to get better on your job, that the coworker who makes your life miserable will ever change, or that your boss will ever recognize and appreciate what you do. It just looks hopeless to you and therefore you are losing your motivation to work hard and do your work with excellence. You need hope! So what can you do?
Talk to yourself like the Psalmist did: Stop thinking about everything that is wrong. Think about what is right! Right there on the job, in the midst of the hopeless situation, put your hope in God. He is trustworthy; his word is true. You won’t be disappointed. But you have to make the choice to pursue hope.
And quite simply, that means you have to spend time in God’s Word and prayer, asking the Holy Spirit to give you hope. We have a God of hope—he has an inexhaustible supply of hope for you. Ask him for hope today. Choose hope today.
How is your hope? Paul wrote to the Romans, “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit” (Romans 15:13). Would you say that you are “overflowing with hope”? And what would that look like?
Think about the times in your life when you are really struggling. Your faith is weak, the circumstances seem to get worse, you feel like quitting, you want to run away, things are just not good. What is missing in those times? It’s hope, isn’t it? You’ve lost hope that God is going to come through, or that those difficult people in your life will ever change, or that life will ever get easier. The loss of hope leads eventually to depression and at its extreme, to no longer wanting to live.
Hope is absolutely essential to your life. You cannot make it without hope. And in this passage Paul gives the secret—the pathway—that will give you overflowing hope. Two things: you must trust in the God of hope, and secondly, you must rely on the power of the Holy Spirit. So, if you want to overflow with hope and know the joy and peace that hope brings, you have to be intentional about trusting in God.
Putting your trust in God means that you deliberately choose to believe God loves you, God cares for you, and God has good plans for you. You trust when you cannot see or understand. Hope comes as you decide that you will trust God—and conversely, hope dies when you worry, when you are fearful, when you forget to trust God.
I know it’s easy to say, “Just trust God” and it may seem trite when you’re in the midst of despair. But, dear friends, trust is a choice you and I must make and it’s not once and done. Most of the time it’s a daily choice—sometimes several times a day—when you speak truth to yourself and choose hope. Here’s the good news: if you are born again through faith in Jesus, you have the power to do this because you have the Holy Spirit. So, it’s a matter of turning that power on and choosing hope.
No doubt you are familiar with the last verse of 1 Corinthians 13 which says, “And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.” Faith, hope and love are absolute essentials in our lives as Christians. They are the three qualities which always remain. They make us strong, and when the three join together—when we are full of faith, hope and love—then we are balanced and ready to go forward with what God has planned for us to do.
We talk more about faith and love that we do hope, as a rule, but honestly, life without hope is no life at all. Hope is mentioned in the Bible more than 167 times. But have you ever asked why hope is so important?
Well, first we need to understand the difference between our casual use of the word “hope,” and the Bible’s meaning. Often we talk about hope when something in the future is not certain. We say, I hope it won’t rain today or I hope I’ll get a raise. But when the Bible speaks of hope, it means that something in the future is certain. It means you can be confident because your hope in God is firm and secure. For example, when we are born from above through faith in Jesus Christ, we have the hope of eternal life. But that hope is certain and sure; there’s no uncertainty in that hope for our future.
Why is hope so important to us in our daily lives and in our hearts and minds? Well, for one reason, hope gives us an eternal perspective. Hope helps us to see beyond the present circumstances and believe that there are good days ahead. When we are at our lowest point, hope lifts our head, convinces us that we have a future and a hope, as we read in Jeremiah 29:11: “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Hope is what we’re focusing on here at The Christian Working Woman this month. God has plans for you if you are a Christ-follower, and those plans give you hope, even though you may not know exactly what they are right at this moment.
A friend once said to me, “I feel like a total failure,” I was taken aback, because she is anything but a total failure. But I know the feeling, don't you? Maybe that's the way you feel. Perhaps your plans and dreams have never materialized or something you attempted didn't work. Or maybe you've failed in your moral behavior or in your lifestyle and habits. How in the world can we face our failures without being devastated?
I truly do speak from my heart as I approach this topic of failure. If experience qualifies me as an expert, then I feel fairly competent to talk about failure, because I've had my share. There are some gigantic failures in my past, things for all the world to see, and there are others which are smaller, known only to God and me.
I haven't outgrown failure; none of us do. But I know this beyond any doubt: the God I serve is great enough to give me the strength and the ability to face my failures and to recover from them. In fact, in his incredible efficiency, he uses my failures to teach me and to help me encourage others.
Maybe you are even now struggling with failure. You feel totally defeated and discouraged because you've failed in some way. Maybe you keep failing in the same way over and over, and you're ashamed and guilt-ridden as a result. I want to talk to you from my heart today, as one who is in that same boat with you, but who is learning the good news that failures don't have to be fatal.
Let me first share with you the blessings of failure. I know, you didn't think there were any blessings in failure, but believe me, there are. Here's what I mean. One of the most difficult things for any of us human beings to admit is that we are sinful. None of us truly want to believe that deep within us is this sin nature which tries to control us; none of us like to think that we are not capable in ourselves of doing good or being good.
That's because we're born proud. Pride is at the root of all our wrong thinking and actions. We have to come to the understanding that within us there is no good thing and all the things which we call good look like filthy rags to God. On our own we're just one huge mess! So, this inborn pride can keep us from knowing God, from the fullness of who we are in Christ.
Therefore, failure is a blessing, for it teaches us just exactly who we are in our natural, unredeemed condition. C. S. Lewis states it so well in his book Mere Christianity: Speaking of failure he says: "It cures our illusions about ourselves and teaches us to depend on God. We learn, on the one hand, that we cannot trust ourselves even in our best moments, and on the other, that we need not despair even in our worst, for our failures are forgiven."
So, those failures which look like total disasters to you can indeed be an instrument of blessing to teach you this essential truth about yourself; to "cure your illusions about yourself," as Lewis puts it. I know they're painful; I know it is an unpleasant lesson to learn. But, dear friends, until we know the depth of our fallen state and how truly helpless and hopeless we are on our own, we can never know God as we need to.
I want to look again at a story of failure in Scripture and see how our Lord dealt with it. You'll find it recorded in Luke 22, where we see Peter as a total failure. Did you ever think about the fact that Jesus knew beforehand precisely how badly Peter would fail him? He tells Peter exactly what Peter's going to do and when: "Before the rooster crows today, you will deny three times that you know me.” Jesus knew, and yet, he didn't discard Peter because of his miserable failure.
In Luke 22:31 Jesus said, "Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift you as wheat. But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail.” It’s interesting that Jesus called Peter "Simon,” his old name, the one he had before he met Jesus. This is the proud "I-can-do-anything-I-want-to" Simon,
I’m usually a bit reluctant to suggest another thing you need to do. After all, you are busy as it is, and you probably think that you can’t add one more thing to your life, to your to-do list, to your schedule.
I understand that, but it became clear to me a few weeks ago that God wanted us here at The Christian Working Woman to offer you a new opportunity. Yes, it will take some time; yes, you will need to be committed; yes, you may have to clear your schedule out a bit. But honestly, if I can inspire you to take seriously this challenge, you will thank me because it is life changing.
We have put together a way to help you memorize Scripture—hide it in your heart—so that you can grow spiritually faster and better than ever before, if indeed you’ve never taken Scripture memorization seriously. Here’s what a good friend of mine said that memorizing Scripture has done for her:
Memorizing has brought assurance and guidance and wisdom and stability and joy and hope in my thinking. Yes, it’s harder to memorize now as an adult, but I’m convinced of its importance as an anchor for the soul and renewing the mind and keeping my thinking in line with the Gospel.
Would you like to experience a new joy in your walk with God? Would you like to have this one weapon we have as believers, the word of God, so deeply hidden within you that you can know new victory and new joy? It’s available to you if you will memorize Scripture. We are here to help you do that. You can join with us—there is no cost—and become a part of a community of believers who together have decided to fill their minds with truth. Truth that will set you free.
It's one of the best gifts you could ever give yourself. All the details are available here. Honestly, this is one of the best offers I’ve ever made to you because I know the difference it will make in your life.
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I am truly excited to tell you about a new initiative we’ve begun here at The Christian Working Woman which is called The Hidden Word. This is a simple way to encourage you to join me in a regular program of memorizing Scripture because it is the most powerful thing you can do to be all that God has created you to be and to do the good works he put you here to do.
But I can imagine that you have mentally turned me off about right now because you have decided that you cannot memorize Scripture; it’s too hard or you’re not good at it or you’re too old—or whatever other excuse you’ve come up with. Well, if you do that, you will miss out on a blessing that will truly make a difference in your life. So, what are the benefits of Scripture memorization? Here are just a few:
You’ll have victory over sin. Psalm 119:11: “I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you.” You’ll be more like Jesus. 2 Corinthians 3:18: “And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.” You contemplate the Lord’s glory by meditating on his Word and memorizing verses will cause you to contemplate the Lord much more. You’ll be able to stand against all of Satan’s attacks that he throws at you, just as Jesus withstood his attacks when he was tempted in the wilderness by quoting Scripture. And he could quote it because it was hidden in his heart. (Matthew 4:1-11) You will have words of comfort and wisdom for others in need. Proverbs 25:11 says, “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver.” Because you will have God’s word hidden in your heart, you’ll be ready to speak beautiful words on the spur of the moment as the Holy Spirit brings those hidden words to your mind. You’ll be ready to share your faith with others. 1 Peter 3:15: “But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect.”
And there are many more incredible benefits available to you, so I invite you to join us and be part of The Hidden Word. All the details are here.
Would you like to know one thing you can do that will make a greater impact for spiritual growth in your life than anything else? it is memorizing Scripture and hiding it in your heart.
Dallas Willard was recognized as a spiritual development scholar, and here is what he wrote: “Bible memorization is absolutely fundamental to spiritual formation. If I had to choose between all the disciplines of the spiritual life, I would choose Bible memorization, because it is a fundamental way of filling our minds with what it needs.” Dear friend, he was so right. We are what we think, and we think about what we put into our minds. Dallas called it a “spiritual discipline,” as most people do, but I prefer to call it a spiritual birthright. It is your right if you are born again through faith in Christ to be transformed in ways you never thought possible by taking advantage of this privilege to hide God’s word in your heart.
So, we have a new opportunity to offer you; I’m calling it The Hidden Word, and if you want to join with me, we are initiating a new program that will give structure to this spiritual birthright. You can join with others as we memorize various passages of Scripture together, within a time frame, and we will become a community of people who have The Hidden Word in our hearts. We will encourage you; you will get to know others with the same intention, if you wish, and it will indeed become a transformational force for all of us, through the power of God’s word and the Holy Spirit.
If this strikes a note in your heart, as it has mine, please join with me and become a part of The Hidden Word. All the details are now available here. There is absolutely no cost for you to join with us, but instead there is great treasure for you if you purpose to hide God’s word in your heart.
Chances are you are familiar with this verse from Psalm 119:11: I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you. When you hide something in your heart, it’s there to stay, isn’t it? It’s in a place where no one can take it from you—it’s hidden there for you whenever you need it. And the Psalmist notes that hiding God’s word in that special place gives you victory over sin.
Is there some sin in your life—maybe something nobody knows about but you—but some habit or addiction or sinful way that you haven’t been able yet to conquer? You want to but as hard as you try, it just sticks around. Have you hidden God’s word in your heart? That’s the secret to living a pure life that pleases the Lord. That’s the secret to being a victorious Christian who blesses many others because of that hidden word.
Here at The Christian Working Woman I’ve decided to make this a high priority for me and to encourage others to join me. I’m calling this new program The Hidden Word, and we have designed a simple program to help you hide God’s word in your heart. Some people call Scripture memorization a spiritual discipline, but I prefer to call it a spiritual benefit that is ours when we are Christians.
The Bible says “But the word of the Lord endures forever. And this is the word that was preached to you” (1 Peter 1:25). I can testify to this because my dear mother memorized Scripture all her life. She had a plan that she followed; it was a discipline, but she never thought of it that way. It was her delight. And because she had hidden God’s word in her heart so faithfully for so many years, she grew sweeter and more Christ-like as she aged. And in the last years, when dementia was taking a toll, many things she could not remember, but she could quote the Word of God because it was hidden in her heart and nobody could take it away from her. It endured forever.
No doubt you’ve heard of “spiritual disciplines.” These are things we need to do in order to grow spiritually, such as reading your Bible, praying, fellowship with other believers, memorizing Scripture, etc. Frankly, I would like to find another word to describe these things because the word “discipline” just has so much baggage attached to it.
Discipline conjures up in our minds controls, regulations, rules, strictness—words that are not naturally inviting, wouldn’t you agree? I would rather call them spiritual benefits, spiritual privileges, spiritual birthrights—something like that. These are the things that make a huge difference in our growth as Christ-followers when we incorporate them into our daily lives. The benefits of these spiritual privileges are uniquely available to those who have been born again through faith in Christ.
So, are you taking advantage of your spiritual birthrights? Recently God put it on my heart to make it a high priority in my life to memorize Scripture on a more regular basis and encourage others to join me. We are beginning a new opportunity here at The Christian Working Woman, which I am calling “The Hidden Word.” The purpose is to encourage and inspire you to make memorizing Scripture a priority in your life, to give you a structured way you can do it, and to encourage you in every way possible to keep at it.
Why? Because this spiritual privilege has benefits like no other. From his book, Growing Strong in the Seasons of Life, Chuck Swindoll wrote:
“I know of no other single practice in the Christian life more rewarding, practically speaking, than memorizing Scripture. . . . No other single exercise pays greater spiritual dividends! . . .Your attitudes and outlook will begin to change. Your mind will become alert and observant. Your confidence and assurance will be enhanced. Your faith will be solidified.”
Sounds like a deal too good to pass up.
Here is a wonderful verse from Galatians 5:1: “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.”
I do believe the most common thing that keeps us in bondage is fear. In his book Imagine Your Life without Fear, Max Lucado writes: “Fear corrodes our confidence in God’s goodness…And it turns us into control freaks…Fear, at its center, is a perceived loss of control.”
Now just think about that for a minute. Fear causes us to lose trust in God. Fear and faith can never coexist. So, note that any time fear is taking over your mind, faith has just been put out to pasture. When we lose faith in God and his goodness—though we never verbalize it that way, and we wouldn’t admit it—we begin to try to take control and do what we think is best. We do indeed become control freaks!
Fear Is Sin
The first thing you must do to be set free from fear is recognize how sinful it is for you to be fearful for that means you have abandoned your trust in God in that area. How dare we not trust our trustworthy God? This was the beginning of my learning to trust God many years ago. I finally realized that I was afraid to trust God. Whatever other fears I had, they began with my fear of trusting God. And it finally dawned on me that my fear of trusting God was indeed a sin against the God who is totally trustworthy.
We lose trust in people when they prove not to be trustworthy—right? They promised you something and didn’t come through. They failed you time and again, and you’ve concluded they just are not trustworthy. But has God ever failed you? Has one promise of his ever failed? 2 Corinthians 1:20: “For no matter how many promises God has made, they are “Yes” in Christ. And so through him the “Amen” is spoken by us to the glory of God.” I was afraid to trust God because I feared he had a plan for my life that was not what I wanted. I somehow thought my plan was better than his, and I couldn’t trust his plan because it might take me where I didn’t want to go. I couldn’t run the risk of allowing God to direct my path. Now, had you asked me at that time if I was afraid to trust God, no doubt I would have said “no.” You see, I didn’t see it for what it really was—a fear of trusting God. When it finally dawned on me that this fear was like a slap in the face of God, I was appalled at my sin.
That’s because I had begun—finally—to invest time and passion into getting to know God, and the more you get to know God, the more you believe in him and trust him. So, if there is some fear in your life, the root cause of it is that you are afraid to trust God in that place, which probably means you need to get to know him better. To know him is to trust him.
Pockets of Fear
Why do we trust God in some areas and not in others? Because we have pockets of fear—areas where it's more difficult for us to trust than others. You may be able to identify the sources of that fear—the things that happened to you in years past that cause that fear. It’s usually a good idea to understand why there are some pockets of fear in your life that have not yet been abolished.
But it’s not a good idea to stay mired in that fear. You can blame others, but it doesn’t solve the problem. You can throw pity parties and feel sorry for yourself, but it doesn’t get rid of the fear. You can talk about it and think about it and re-tell it as many times as you like, but that never does any good—just makes it seem larger than it is.
First, you have to recognize that your fear is an attack of the enemy on your life. God never gives you a spirit of fear. Obviously, there are some things and situations where fear is appropriate. We teach our children to fear some things like fire, crossing busy streets, talking with strangers, rattlesnakes—things like that. But we should never want them to have a spirit of fear. 2 Timothy 1:7: “For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and ...
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Twenty-five years ago there was a marketing campaign called “Got Milk?” Remember that? Now you may not be old enough to remember it, but it was a campaign to get people to drink more milk.
You would see pictures of celebrities with big smiles on their faces along with a very pronounced milk mustache making it obvious that they had been drinking the white dairy drink.
The Got Milk? Campaign showed consumers what could happen if they ever ran out of milk: everything from cookies to cereal to peanut butter and jelly sandwiches would be ruined without it.
When I think of that catchy and memorable slogan (that I recall 25 years later!), I am inclined to change it to, “Got Hope?”
Running out of milk is one thing—it can make your cereal dry and boring but don’t run out of hope. Hope is as necessary to life as the air we breathe. It’s what sustains us and keeps us alive.
Hope never runs out because Jesus is constant. He never fails. He is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow. But if we are not careful, mindful and intentional about focusing our hope in Jesus we will run out.
And I just want to clarify something. When we have hope we are not saying we will avoid pain, suffering and loss in our lives. When we’ve “Got Hope” it does not mean we’ll never be disappointed. Hope and disappointment, hope and suffering can coexist. In fact, for followers of Jesus they do coexist because Jesus is our hope and we do not put hope in anything else. Not a pain free life or a perfect marriage.
Hope, Jesus, keeps us going through painful experiences and fear of what the future may hold.
Hope is not simply optimism. It is assurance—trust, faith, and belief in the promises of God. In John 16:33 Jesus said, “In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”
When you are confronted with the questions, Got Hope?, respond with a resounding Yes! I have Jesus and he is my living hope.
When people see you living with hope, especially when life is chaotic and unpredictable (kind of like the last two years) we point to Jesus when we respond with faith, with peace, with hope.
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(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
The next hope builder is preaching the truth to yourself.
I don’t know of a better way to be reminded of the hope we have in Jesus than to spend time in his Word, meditating on it and letting truth wash over our minds and purify our hearts.
Psalm 1:2-3a reminds us that, “Those whose delight is in the law of the Lord, and who meditates on his law day and night. That person is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither….”
As we anchor ourselves in hope today let’s look to Psalm 23 which reminds us of the truth of who Jesus is. Our Shepherd. And who we are. The flock under his care. The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, He refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake. Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely your goodness, mercy and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever (Psalm 23:1-6 ). As followers of Jesus it can be easy to get preoccupied, overwhelmed, and distracted and take our focus off of our true hope, Jesus. We can easily fall into the trap of forgetting who God is.
Consider memorizing Psalm 23. A few years ago I read a book about Psalm 23 and the author encouraged his readers to commit it to memory. I memorized these words several years ago and let me tell you, being able to quickly rehearse these truths has been a lifesaver time and time again. In fact, Psalm 119:11 instructs us to store up God’s Word in our heart. Memorizing scripture is an important practice as we love and follow Jesus.
Remember that Jesus is your Shepherd. He watches closely over you.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Where does your hope come from? What do we do when we feel hopeless? Have a posture of praise.
When things in life are not going the way we want, it can be easy to be discouraged and fall into despair. We can forget God’s faithfulness. Sometimes the last thing we feel like doing is praising God. But praising him is not something we do when we feel like it. Blessing God and worshiping him is a daily practice as a follower of Jesus. Not conditional, only when life is going the way we planned, but a daily discipline because God is faithful and worthy of all of our praise.
When we intentionally position ourselves in a posture of praise to God, we are reminded of the hope we have in Jesus.
My friend Becky, author of “The 30-Day Praise Challenge,” says “Praise is your intentional offering of worship, strengthening your faith and unlocking the key to joy no matter what your life circumstance.”
In Psalm 103 King David, who experienced all kinds of trials, tribulations, betrayals, disappointments and despair in his life instructs his heart to praise. He says “Bless the Lord, O my soul and all that is within me, bless his holy name!” (ESV)
To bless means to kneel, to praise. It gives us a visual of David’s posture of praise. David is not giving God a holy high five. He is not giving God a half-hearted blessing. He is saying, with my whole heart, with my whole life, and with my innermost being, I bow in wonder and love before you, the holy God! David speaks directly to his heart.
It reminds me of Psalm 150:6: “Let everything that has breath praise The Lord.”
Did you know that God in his magnificence actually wired us for worship? God designed us so that worship literally impacts our brains, our minds. Studies have shown that worship induces happiness and joy, it boosts our immune system. We often wait to worship until we feel like it but we are actually wired to worship.
God knows when we worship him our lives are transformed, even if our circumstances don’t change. Worship changes us.
So if you want to experience more hope in your life, praise the source of your hope, Jesus. Ask him to bring to mind all of the ways he has been faithful. Ask him to draw your heart close to him. Get on your knees and pray, bowing down in adoration and wonder to the Lord. Turn on some praise music. Put yourself in a posture of praise and let hope arise.
You are wired for worship.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Lasting hope comes when we don’t rely on our limited knowledge and wisdom.
Our next hope builder is found in Proverbs 3:5-6: Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. When we rely on our own perspective it can be easy to lose hope. All too often I can be prone to rely on my own understanding in life. And time and time again my knowledge has been so incredibly limited. We can never see the full picture but God does and so Proverbs reminds us to seek and lean on him and not our own limited view.
So many of the things that cause us the most difficulty and heartache in life, the source of so much of our anxiety, fear, doubt, despair, is the result of leaning on our own understanding. In exercising faith — we determine to trust fully in the Lord, to ask him to help us see his ways and to acknowledge and express our gratitude to him. To trust him because we know his character. And as we trust and hope in him, he will make our paths straight.
Do you trust God? Do you measure God’s trustworthiness based on your circumstances? On whether or not things are going the way that you think they should in life?
Are you trusting in what you can see, leaning on your own limited and often flawed perception of reality? Or are you putting your confidence, hope, and trust in the unchanging character and wisdom of Jesus?
There have been times in my life where I have asked God Why are you letting this happen to me? Or, Why are you withholding this dream or desire from me? All the while, he knew if I got that thing or stayed in that relationship, it would not end well.
There have been times I have thoroughly convinced myself that I was right about something only to find out I was dead wrong. I took matters into my own hands because I did not think God cared or saw me and that led to unnecessary pain and suffering.
In Isaiah 55:9 God says, “My thoughts are higher than your thoughts, my ways are higher than your ways.”
He is saying, “Will you trust me?” “Will you put your hope in me, even when, especially when life is not making sense?”
So when life does not seem to be making sense let’s be wise, not leaning on our own understanding but acknowledging and putting our hope in Jesus.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
What are some ways to build hope?
Proverbs 3:5-6 has this wisdom. Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. The Hebrew word for trust here means to be bold, confident, secure, and certain in who we put our confidence in. It means, make to hope. So when I trust God with all my heart the result is hope. I am confident and secure in putting my trust in him as he alone is my source of hope. Who or what we put our trust in, has a huge impact on our lives as followers of Christ.
The word Lord in these verses is translated Yehovah in Hebrew. Yehovah is the proper name of the one true God. Back in Old Testament times, much like today, people were putting their trust and hope in other gods—the god of money, fertility, the sun god, the god of fire, to name a few. They were depending on and placing their confidence in small gods, idols, but not the one true God. So here we are instructed to put our full confidence and hope in the one true God, Yehovah.
If we are honest, it can be tempting to put our trust and confidence in things, people, and circumstances and to not fully put our hope in Jesus. We too can look to things other than Jesus to provide hope: relationships, career, kids, our health, our wealth. But those things will not ultimately bring the satisfaction, the hope our hearts long for.
Trusting in the Lord with all my heart reminds me of the song Solid Rock.
My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus’ blood and righteousness. I dare not trust the sweetest frame but wholly trust in Jesus’ name. On Christ the solid rock I stand all other ground is sinking sand, all other ground is sinking sand.
Who or what are you putting your trust, your hope in? Confess to Jesus and ask him to help you properly place your confidence in him.
(As Presented by Lisa Bishop)
The past 2 years have thrown a lot of curve balls our way. I’m wondering what last year was like for you. What were some of the things you had hoped would happen but didn’t? What are some things you had hoped would not happen but did? And, how is your hope as this new year has gotten under way?
Webster's dictionary definition of hope is: A desire of some good, accompanied with at least a slight expectation of obtaining it. Or an expectation or optimism for the future.
We’ve all been there, hoping for something. Maybe you have hoped for a new job, a relationship, a new home or a promotion, good news of a child after years of battling with infertility. Maybe you have hoped that your son or daughter would get their life on track or that a broken relationship would be restored. Perhaps you have hoped for healing of a disease or physical ailment for yourself or someone close to you.
I have had many hopes over the years. Some things I have hoped for came to fruition. Others didn’t. For years I hoped for marriage. I hoped that that special someone would notice me and choose me to be their wife. And along with marriage, I hoped one day to have kids. Today I am 52, single, never married and I don’t have children.
Almost eight years ago my dad unexpectedly fell ill. I hoped he would recover, but he didn't.
For several years I had hoped that God would bring me a new job. The one I was in felt like a dead end and I wasn’t passionate about it. I experienced a stirring for a career that felt meaningful. It took seven years until a new job, one that was in alignment with my calling, came my way.
We all have expectations and longings. We all hope.
What do we do when what we hope for, what we long for, doesn’t happen? How will we act when things do not turn out the way that we want or not in our timing?
Hope is an important Christian virtue, it’s a standard of our Christian faith. And hope is essential especially as we seek to stay grounded in the midst of life’s challenges, losses and disappointments. Because let’s face it, life will have disappointments. So how do we maintain hope?
In Proverbs 13:12 King Solomon penned these words of wisdom: “Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.”
When something we hope for is delayed it can cause despair and affliction. Unmet longing can make us heart sick. When was a time in your life that you experienced despair when something you hoped for did not come to fruition, was postponed or delayed?
In the second part of Proverbs 13:12 Solomon gives the antithesis of hope deferred when he says, “But a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.” The tree of life represents the renewal of life.
When our hopes and desires are fulfilled, we are refreshed. When our prayers are answered, we are encouraged. When we obtain the good thing that we desire, our souls feel revived. Solomon reiterates the sentiment in Proverbs 13:19: “A longing fulfilled is sweet to the soul.”
The reality is that dashed hopes can sicken the heart, and the higher the expectations, the greater the potential for despair. So what do we make of Solomon’s words on hope?
God created us to desire; he created us to have hope.
While receiving what we desire can be an excellent and fulfilling thing, we must not allow the pursuit of it, the fulfillment of it to become the ultimate. As followers of Jesus, we must know and believe that our ultimate hope is in him. Our hope is in the giver of all good things, not the good things themselves.
When we misplace our true hope and an unmet desire and expectation turns to hopelessness, we can become spiritually dried up and really vulnerable to the enemy’s attacks. We start believing lies about God and that is the beginning of a downward spiral. Think of a time when a prayer or something you asked of God was not answered in the way you wanted. What did you feel? How did you act?
Have you ever had the run-away blues? The run-away blues are those days, those times in your life when you’d just love to run away. When the thought of going to the airport and catching the next flight out to anywhere else, rather than where you are, sounds like a really good idea. Run-away blues—who hasn’t had those days?
David expressed it so well in Psalm 55. He was in a bad place then; his enemies were threatening him, his mind was a jumbled mess, his heart was in anguish and he was frightened. Now mind you, that was the condition of King David, a man after God’s own heart, who was chosen by God to be the King of Israel. David, why would you want to run-away? But listen to what he wrote: “I said, ‘Oh, that I had the wings of a dove! I would fly away and be at rest. I would flee far away and stay in the desert; I would hurry to my place of shelter, far from the tempest and storm’” (Psalm 55:6-8). David was doing what he was supposed to do, as God’s-appointed king, and yet he longed to fly away and be at rest. Are you right now where David was then? Well, aren’t you glad he was inspired by God to put his feelings in writing and leave them for you? It says that you aren’t condemned for feeling like you want to run away. Even kings have those times. But you have a God who cares and who can bring release and relief for you, right there where you are.
After expressing his run-away desires and fears to God, David then says: “As for me, I call to God, and the Lord saves me. Evening, morning and noon I cry out in distress, and he hears my voice. . . Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken” (Psalm 55:16-17, 22). I want to leave you with these words of hope, from a king who wanted to fly away from where God had planted him. Even in the midst of doing what God has called you to do, you can lose your bloom and the enemy can steal your joy. If that’s where you are, just call to God—cry out to him. Cast your cares on the Lord, and he will put a new bloom inside you, and your desert will become a garden where you’re blooming again and the joy of the Lord will again be your strength.
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If you want to be inspired, just google “plants that grow in concrete” and you will see amazing pictures of all kinds of flowers and plants that are able to grow in the most difficult, unlikely places. I was totally mesmerized to see lovely flowers growing out of cracks in a sidewalk, beautiful blooms popping up from a pile of old tires—picture after picture of plants that bloomed in the most unlikely and difficult places.
That’s what I’ve been talking about this week—the challenge each of us faces to make the very best of where we are, blooming where we are planted. The children of Israel were captured and taken from Jerusalem to Babylon, and through the prophet Jeremiah, God told them to bloom right there. You’ll find that story in Jeremiah 29.
But in Psalm 137 we find this sad passage: “By the rivers of Babylon we sat and wept when we remembered Zion. There on the poplars we hung our harps, for there our captors asked us for songs, our tormentors demanded songs of joy; they said, ‘Sing us one of the songs of Zion!’ How can we sing the songs of the Lord while in a foreign land?” (Psalm 137:1-4). Doesn’t sound like they were blooming there in Babylon, does it? Their joy was gone; their song was dead; they had given up because they were in Babylon and not in Jerusalem. Notice that they had the opportunity to sing the songs of Zion, the songs of the Lord. They could have shared the truth about the true God with these pagan people, but their response was, “How can we sing the songs of the Lord while in a foreign land?”
Maybe that’s where you are. You’re in some place that you don’t want to be—maybe you’re just bored or tired or totally unmotivated, so you’ve hung your harp on a poplar tree, so to speak, and quit blooming. I’ve been there; I know how that feels, but I just want to encourage you to remember that there is a beautiful bloom inside of you, planted there by our God, and if you’ll open a little crack and let his sunshine in, you can bloom right there again and his love will shoot up through that crack and you’ll once again bloom where you’re planted.
So, go get that harp you hung up on the poplar tree, and by faith—not necessarily by feelings—ask God to give you a song to sing right where you are, a song from the Lord even while you’re planted in that place you don’t want to be. You can turn your Babylon into a garden full of God’s love, knowing he loves you and sharing his love with everyone around you.
“Bloom where you are planted.” It’s not found in the Bible but it certainly is a biblical attitude. There’s a passage in Jeremiah that is a great example of what it means to “bloom where you are planted.” You’ll find it in Jeremiah 29, and it is a letter that the prophet wrote to the people whom Nebuchadnezzar had carried into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon. Get the picture? They are God’s chosen people, now refugees who have been forcibly relocated in Babylon. And here is what Jeremiah wrote to them: “This is what the Lord Almighty, the God of Israel, says to all those I carried into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon: ‘Build houses and settle down; plant gardens and eat what they produce. Marry and have sons and daughters; find wives for your sons and give your daughters in marriage, so that they too may have sons and daughters. Increase in number there; do not decrease. Also, seek the peace and prosperity of the city to which I have carried you into exile. Pray to the Lord for it, because if it prospers, you too will prosper’” (Jeremiah 29:4-7). Jeremiah didn’t say that they should fight to get back to Jerusalem. He didn’t say they should just get by until God provided a way of escape. He said to make the very best of the situation they were in. This was a foreign culture; there was no temple in Babylon; it was a pagan culture, worshipping many false gods. And yet this is where they found themselves—this is where they were planted.
Notice that God told them that he had carried them into exile, not Nebuchadnezzar. This must have been an amazing statement to them. Their God had brought them to this terrible land? Why would God plant them there? It was hostile to their way of life, to their beliefs, to their God. And yet God made it clear that they were to bloom right there in Babylon where they were planted.
I am reminded that we who are Christ-followers are called foreigners and exiles in this world. Peter writes that we should “live out our time as foreigners here in reverent fear” (1 Peter 1:17b). We are planted here, and while we’re here we should bloom for Jesus. The exiles in Babylon were to build houses, plant gardens, marry, increase in number and seek peace and prosperity for the city of Babylon. They were to bloom in Babylon, of all places.
Are you blooming where you are now planted, or have you allowed the circumstances of life to destroy your will to bloom, to steal your joy? I want to encourage you to know that God can cause you to bloom in ways you’ve never imagined, if you will be willing to bloom right where you are planted.
What does it mean to “Bloom where you are planted”? You’ve no doubt heard this expression; in fact, some people think it is in the Bible. No, this saying is not found in the Bible, but the concept it teaches is very biblical.
It begins with the word “bloom” which is a verb—an action word—and it implies that you have to be intentional about this. Blooming means producing something beautiful. So, the first word—bloom—is a directive, something you must do.
Then it says, “where you are.” Do you often have the attitude that you would do so well if only you were in other circumstances? A different job, a better house, a more-understanding mate, better- behaved children, enough money, better health—just give you better circumstances, solve some of your problems, and then you can bloom. Instead of “Bloom where you are planted,” you think, “Put me in better soil and then I’ll bloom!”
Some years ago a good friend was planted in a job where some of her coworkers were unfriendly and prejudicial toward her. Instead of lowering herself to their level, or being angry, or vengeful, after much prayer, God led her to begin what she called “Project Love,” intentionally inviting these coworkers to have lunch with her, and in that way breaking down the barriers between them. It wasn’t long before these same people got to know my friend, saw in her the love of Jesus, and soon came to appreciate her and that was the beginning of some long and good friendships. She bloomed where she was.
And the last word in this saying is “planted.” Bloom where you are planted. When something is planted, it is placed there intentionally, right? It’s not just a wild flower springing up on a mountainside. Someone has gone to the trouble of preparing a spot, a place, where this seed can be planted. Being planted implies that something outside of itself had a purpose for putting that plant in that place.
You know, where you are now is where God has planted you. Oh, there may have been all kinds of circumstances, good and bad, that have brought you to the spot where you are now planted, but God has this marvelous way of taking us where we are and preparing the soil for us even there, so that we can bloom where we are planted.
Would you pause long enough to just thank God for where you are planted? I know, it could be a tough place, but the Bible says to be thankful in all circumstances, so by faith just thank God for where he has planted you and then ask him to help you bloom in that place.
I wonder if you know where this is found in the Bible? “Bloom where you are planted.” Is it in the Psalms, or maybe Jesus said it? Do you know? Well, the truth is, you won’t find that exact phrase in the Bible, but you will find the principle it teaches very clearly given in Scripture.
When the Apostle Paul said we should learn to be content no matter what our circumstances, he was saying “Bloom where you are planted.” When Jesus said not to worry about tomorrow because tomorrow would take care of itself, he was saying “Bloom where you are planted.” In writing to the Corinthian Christians, Paul said, “Nevertheless, each person should live as a believer in whatever situation the Lord has assigned to them, just as God has called them” (1 Corinthians 7:17). He was admonishing those new believers to bloom where they were planted.
Recently I had an opportunity to talk to a senior citizen, Betty, in her late 80’s, who is blooming where she is planted. Betty is a widow and a mom of three grown children and lots of grandchildren. She is a Jesus-lover from way back, and at this stage in her life, she is finding creative ways to reach out to others with the love of Jesus.
Betty’s husband died after a very long illness where she was his main caregiver. So she spent many years simply taking care of his needs. Now that she lives alone and is still driving, she has found a way to continue to share the love of Jesus with others. She goes to the grocery store every day. She said, “That way I don’t have heavy bags to carry if I just get a few things each day. And then, I just go up and down the aisles of the store, to see who God puts in my path that day.”
Betty uses her daily trips to the grocery store as a way to meet people, to offer encouragement, to pray for people, and to let them know that Jesus loves them. Almost every day she has an opportunity to speak to someone—mostly strangers—and simply offer a moment of caring and concern. She has story after story of the people she has met in this way, and how blessed she is to have this ministry.
Betty didn’t complain about the effects of growing older, or the fact that she was alone now, or the aches and pains that occur as you age. She is just blooming where she is, bringing joy and a ray of hope to many people who just happen to shop for groceries where she does.
We’re living in a time of panic, aren’t we? We might call it a Pandemic Panic! And while we all hope it will run its course very soon, we simply don’t know. It seems as though nobody knows—except of course, our Omnipotent God. So, in the midst of all this, I just thought it might be a good idea to remind us who are Christ followers that we have the secret to peace in the midst of panic.
Let me begin by making it clear I’m not saying that because we’re Christians, we should just sail through these panicky days without missing a beat, no stress, no worries. Some of you have no doubt personally struggled with this disease and its variants or you’ve had people very close to you who have struggled, and some even died as a result. We don’t make light of it at all. And we’ve all had to deal with the loss of freedom, the restrictions, the masks and mandates, and a myriad other situations resulting from this pandemic.
But since it is true that we have peace in the person of Jesus Christ—for he is our peace—and since it is true that he has given his peace to us as our own unique possession, then shouldn’t it be true that as Christ-followers, we should demonstrate peace in the midst of this panic? Let me remind you: Ephesians 2:14a: “For he himself is our peace,”
John 14:27: “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” Notice that Jesus says, “Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” He gave you peace—his peace that is totally different and infinitely better than any peace the world tries to give you. But you have a part in this, right? It’s that “do not” part. So, how “do you not” let your heart be troubled or afraid?
The battle is, of course, in your mind—in your thoughts. This takes us back to that basic Christian discipline which is absolutely vital in our Christian walk, based on 2 Corinthians 10:5: “We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.”
Notice again that in order to think like we should think, we must “take captive” wrong thoughts. So, as we deal with the lack of peace in our lives, what we are really dealing with is the lack of peace in our minds. And that happens because we allow our hearts to be troubled and afraid because we don’t take wrong thoughts captive. We don’t insist that our thoughts must be obedient to Christ. Nobody can do that for you; you are the only one who can decide to change your thought life.
What does that look like on a daily, thought-by-thought basis? Let me give you a hypothetical example:
You’ve just heard from a good friend who you were with two days ago that she wasn’t feeling so good today, so she got a test to see if it’s COVID. She won’t know until tomorrow, but she just wanted you to be aware that she might have the disease. What is your response?
Well, if you’re like me, your first thought is “Oh, no! I don’t want that disease. I hope she doesn’t have it! I hope I don’t get it.” And your heart beats a little faster as your mind goes to the possibilities of what could be true: your friend has COVID and she has exposed you to it. You start to think of all the plans that you will have to change if you’re sick or just quarantined. You think of other people who have been around you for those two days and worry if they might catch it from you. Maybe you wonder how in the world you can isolate from your family or from your job. And how long will you be quarantined?
Panic drives out peace instantly and it all happens in your thoughts. In this example, you allow your thoughts to imagine the worse before you have any confirmation that there is a problem. Who hasn’t done that? Who doesn’t still do it? The initial panic drives our thoughts where they should not go.
Does that mean you don’t trust God?
Does witnessing on the job scare you to death? Many Christians go undercover because they have the idea that witnessing means carrying large Bibles to work everyday, grabbing people by the shirt collar, cornering them in the lunch room, and ramming the four spiritual laws down their throat.
That's not the way Jesus witnessed and it certainly is not an effective way for us, either. Let me suggest three things that all of us can do on our jobs as a witness:
First, be joyful. I'm sure I don't have to tell you that most people you work with don't know much joy in their lives. Life is a struggle for them. You hear lots of complaining, and negative attitudes are everywhere. If you enter that scene with real joy in your life, it is the most powerful witness you can have.
A second way we can all witness, no matter what kind of situation we're in, is to do quality work. The Bible tells us to do what our hands have found to do with all our hearts. We are reminded that we will be accountable to the Lord for the work we do for our employer. We have a much higher manager to report to than our co-workers who are not believers. Therefore, quality work, extra-mile effort, should be a trademark of a Christian in the working world.
And the third thing we can all do is to pray. Do you pray earnestly for the people you deal with on your job—co-workers, managers, customers? Be specific and pray for them as individuals, calling them by name. Ask God to intervene in the problem relationships of your workplace. Pray for those in authority, that they'll do their jobs with integrity and efficiency.
We need to develop relationships with the people on our jobs as much as possible. Someone asked me how far we should go in socializing with our co-workers. My answer was "As far as you can without compromising your beliefs and principles.” Jesus socialized with the most sinful people of his day. By establishing relationships and showing that you care about them as individuals, you will earn your right to be heard. And someday you may have the opportunity to share in a more direct way.
First Peter 3:15 tells us to always be ready to give an answer to everyone that asks us to give an account for the hope that is in us, with gentleness and reverence. If your life consistently witnesses in these three ways, it won't be long before you will have an opportunity to give an account for the hope that is in you.
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Do you let it be known on your job that you're a Christian? Perhaps you worry that if you're very open about your faith, you will have to take some ethical stands that could be harmful to your career or your relationships.
I have a good friend who was a partner in a prominent large law firm in New York. At one point he was dealing with another law firm which was doing some very unethical things. He, on the other hand, refused to be a part of it and took a stand against it. While it caused some discomfort and took some courage on his part, he told me that eventually that law firm had caused its client to go into bankruptcy because of its unethical practices, many had lost their jobs and the law firm was disgraced. He said, "You know, Mary, running your career or business by Christian principles really pays off in the long run.” And he's right!
However, our decision to stand for what we believe to be right should never be based on the consequences. We do the right thing because we want to be obedient to our Lord and Savior and trust him for the consequences.
Another reason we tend to be undercover Christians is that we fear failing. Maybe you lost your temper with a co-worker recently, or you told a lie to your manager and your conscience hasn't stopped bothering you. You think you could never be a witness for Jesus since you know you've failed and others know you've failed and what's more, you may fail again.
Let me tell you that sometimes the greatest witness we can have is to own up to our failures, confess and make restitution where necessary, but share that God is a forgiving and restoring God. Don't you know that everybody else struggles with failure too? And if they're not a Christian, they don't have any good way to deal with the guilt.
I can remember when God used a specific failure on my part to help a struggling Christian co-worker understand that God would forgive and restore him when he failed. I really blew it in front of him, and I didn't want to go back in that office. But God clearly told me to go back and be very honest about my failure, which is what I did. Obviously it would have been better had I not failed, but God is great enough to use even our failures. Failure or fear of failure is not a legitimate excuse for being an undercover Christian.
Did you know that a lot of Christians operate undercover? Unfortunately that is often true. Some try to keep people from knowing that they are Christ-followers, or they don't take advantage of the opportunities that come their way to share their faith. Why not?
One major reason is the fear of rejection. You know, this fear in our minds is greatly overblown, to begin with. Few Christians really experience severe rejection from co-workers and management because of Christian beliefs and principles. Oh, we may be misunderstood and not always included in activities, but those are very small rejections, as a rule. More often than not, our Christian witness encourages other people and builds bridges rather than creating conflict.
Then we know that fear is always of our enemy and not of the Lord, so we know as soon as we fear something, that our faith needs some serious repair work. If God is for us, Paul wrote to the Romans, who can be against us? (Romans 8:31) And Jesus said, "Whoever acknowledges me before men, I will also acknowledge him before my Father in heaven. But whoever disowns me before men, I will disown him before my Father in heaven” (Matthew 10:32-33).
Another reason we go undercover is because our culture sends the message that religious topics are not appropriate or legal. We need to realize that talking about our belief in Christ and our commitment to him is not breaking a law and we should never be intimidated by this mindset.
For example, if it is your habit to ask a blessing before a meal, then do it on the job. Don't hesitate to tell someone you'll pray for them. If God has answered a prayer, why can't you report your good news and give credit where credit is due? Don't be intimidated by the world's message that God and Jesus are talked about only in churches and the privacy of your home.
If Christ has set you free, how can you not speak of it? When Peter and John were told by those in power not to speak or teach at all in the name of Jesus. They replied, "Judge for yourselves whether it is right in God's sight to obey you rather than God. For we cannot help speaking about what we have seen and heard.”
We need more Christians coming out from under cover who are bold to say what Christ has done in their lives. Nobody can deny your testimony. They can say they don't believe the Bible or they don't believe that Christ is the only way to God. But they can't tell you that what has happened to you didn't happen!
Are you an undercover Christian? Be honest, now; would it be a shock to your co-workers or acquaintances if you told them you were a disciple of Jesus Christ?
For many years I was an undercover Christian. It would have been very difficult to spot any differences in me and everyone else around me. In fact, I didn't want anybody to spot the differences. I didn't want to stick out in a crowd and be a fifth wheel and look and act different. Why is it that we often tend to be undercover Christians? Let me suggest some reasons:
First, being accepted by people is more important to us than anything else. That's one reason many never let anyone know they're a Christian. After all, being born again has gotten some bad press in the last years; most people think of a born-again person as a quirk or a little weird. So, because we fear rejection or persecution, we go undercover. Second, we're intimidated by the cultural attitudes all around us. Separation of church and state has been drummed into our minds by the media so that we start to think we're breaking a law to mention the name of Jesus in secular environments. Third, we don't want to do our career or relationships any damage because of Christian ethical standards. After all, if we let it be known that we are Christians, then we'll be obligated to live up to high ethical standards. That can cause us to have to take stands that may not be popular or understood. Fourth, we know our lives don't measure up to Christian principles, and we're ashamed to say we're Christians. Fifth, we don't know how to witness to people and the very idea scares us to death. How can we witness on the job anyway? Won't that mean we'll have to become religious pests, handing out tracts and quoting Scripture all the time? The thought leaves us scared to death.
Can you identify with some of those? Undercover Christianity is a major problem in the church today.
Why do you work, and why do you have the particular job you have? Do you view your job as simply a means of putting bread on your table so you can do what you want to do with the rest of your time? Do you work just because you have to earn a living?
I entered the working world out of necessity. Oh, that doesn't mean I didn't enjoy it at times. But at first I never saw it as anything but an acceptable way to pay the bills and allow me to have the things I needed and wanted.
What I discovered about myself—and what I find true about many Christians in the working world—is that we tend to divide our lives into two categories: sacred and secular. Sacred includes going to church, studying the Bible occasionally, prayer, fellowshipping with other believers, doing good things for people, etc. Secular includes our jobs, cleaning the house, fixing the car, shopping, etc. Some of our activities seem sacred or religious to us, while others seem to have little connection with God and the Bible.
But, you know, it's a huge mistake on our part to divide our worlds like that. When we see our lives in sacred and secular categories, we often find that our effectiveness as a witness for Jesus Christ is greatly diminished on our job; we find it easy to be an undercover Christian.
Have you ever thought of this: God has designed work as the common denominator for the Christian and non-Christian, and the job is the place where the Christian must meet the non-Christian world. This is no accident. God has planned it that way! Many of us would retreat into our sheltered worlds and avoid any confrontation with unbelievers if we weren't pushed into it because we have to work.
Jesus said he has sent us into the world. None of us is exempted from this. And where is your world into which you are sent? A large part of it is your working world, whether that world is an office or a retail store or a hospital or a factory. That is the world into which you are sent.
Now, the question is, are you there like an undercover Christian, hoping no one finds out that you are one of those “fanatics”? Or afraid to speak up when you have an opportunity? Unfortunately our working worlds are full of undercover Christians, having no impact for Jesus Christ on their worlds. Why are we often ashamed of the gospel of Jesus Christ? Why aren't we bold and courageous to tell of our relationship with the Lord and share the good news with others?
As Fran arrives at her office this Tuesday, she just sits down and logs in to her computer when her co-worker walks in, shutting the door behind him. This signals to Fran that something is up, but what?
“Hi, John,” Fran says, “have a seat. What’s up?”
“Yeah, thanks, Fran. Well,” John begins, “this is kinda touchy and I need to ask you to keep this between you and me if you don’t mind—okay?”
“Wow, sounds serious. What is it?” Fran asks.
“Well, you know that proposal you helped me with last week for that commercial real estate company? Well, after you helped me figure out what the bid should be, my boss thought my numbers were too high. So, he told me to cut them by thirty percent because he said we really needed some new accounts to make our numbers this quarter,” John said.
“Goodness!” Fran says. “That’s a huge cut. So, did your manager tell you that the company would support your reduced numbers and you could do the work for those numbers?”
“No, just the opposite. My boss didn’t clear this with anyone else. He said we could come up with some excuses afterwards to explain why we had to raise our prices, but we just had to win this account,” John explains.
“Well, I’m sure the reason he didn’t get it approved is because he knew he wouldn’t get it approved. We trimmed those numbers as much as possible and he knew it,” Fran responds. “Did you agree to do it, John? Tell me you didn’t.”
John hung his head and got very quiet. “I had to, Fran. What could I do? He said if I wasn’t willing to cut the numbers, he’d give the account to someone else. After all I did to get them to let us bid on their account—I wasn’t going to let that happen,” John replied.
“And you’ve already given them that proposal?” Fran asks.
“No, but the presentation is tomorrow and I am really worried. My boss wants to go with me—he’s afraid I will lose the account, I guess. I know this is wrong and it will backfire, but now I just feel trapped. That’s why I wanted to ask you what I should do?”
Fran pauses to take this in. Why does John want her input on this? She recognizes this could get pretty risky, so she quietly sends up an emergency prayer, “Lord, what do you want me to say? Please give me wisdom.”
“John, why did you think I could help you with this? I’m just curious. . .” Fran asks.
“Well, because you are the one person here that I know would do the right thing. . . I mean, you seem to always be confident of what is right and what is not, and I just thought maybe you would have a suggestion of how I could somehow change my boss’s mind and still not lose this account. I mean, I know you’re a really religious person so. . . well, that’s why I asked you.”
Fran thinks about that a moment. She figures this is a time to speak truth in love—in kindness—and not to be afraid of the consequences.
“Well, thanks for that, John. I don’t think of myself as religious so much as I’m just a Christ-follower and I really try to do what Jesus would want me to do. John, first, let me ask you this: Do you think you could get the account with the right numbers?” Fran asks.
“I really think so,” John says. “You and I talked about it and we both felt we were giving them an exceptional value for their project. I think I could sell it honestly, but now—now I don’t know.”
“Okay, well you’ve asked my opinion or advice, so I’ll tell you what I would do if I were in your shoes and then you have to decide if you’re willing to do it. Fair enough?” Fran asks. John nods and she continues. “Doing the right thing is always the right thing to do, John. It pretty much is that simple. So, you have to decide if you’re willing to stand up for what you believe is the right thing. As you have noted, you believe your original proposal is accurate and fair and competitive, right?”
“Yes,” John agrees.
“It’s not like you didn’t do your homework or you aren’t trying your best to win this new account. So, if I were you,
A prayer I often pray for my extended family—the young people coming up behind us—is that they will walk worthy of the Lord; walk worthy of their heritage and the truth they’ve been taught from God’s Word.
Walking worthy of the Lord is evidenced in our lives especially when things are not easy. You are probably familiar with the term “playing hurt,” which is a description of an athlete who gets back in the game and gives it his or her best, even though they are hurt or injured. Well, as Christ-followers who desire to walk worthy of the Lord, there are times when we have to “play hurt.”
What do you want to do when you've been hurt? Suppose someone has trampled on your feelings or been very cruel to you. If you’re like me, it makes you want to go to the sidelines and lick your wounds, doesn't it? It throws you into a pity-party, and your first reaction is to walk out of the game and say, "Forget it. Who needs this!"
But walking worthy of the Lord would motivate you to “play hurt”—to hold your tongue, refuse to indulge in self-pity, and continue to stay in the game. Jesus is looking for people with perseverance; people who play in spite of the pain; people who stay in the game even though they might want to go sit on the bench for awhile.
While in prison for preaching the Gospel, the Apostle Paul wrote to the believers in Ephesus: “As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received” (Ephesians 4:1). He defined himself not as a prisoner of the Romans, but a prisoner for the Lord. He walked worthy of his calling under the worst kind of circumstances.
Can you think of any effective servant of God who hasn't had to play hurt? I can't. Are you hurt today? If that describes you, are you going to go sit on the sidelines and lick your wounds, or will you choose to walk worthy of the Lord? Ask God to give you the grace and strength to play hurt, so that you can keep on keepin' on for Jesus.
(Click here if you would like to download the entire week's devotional.)
Many times we go to work feeling really positive and up, but we leave in a negative, complaining mood. What are the things in your working world that cause you to have a bad attitude? No question that maintaining a good attitude is one part of walking worthy.
If we're going to be the positive people that we should be as Christians in the working world, then we're going to have to fight the things in our world that tend to bring us into negative territory. What are those things that ruin your whole attitude?
It can be co-workers or management who irritate you, who cause you unnecessary problems, who don't do their share of the work, or who are very negative people themselves. You probably have some of those people in your life.
Or perhaps there are times when you have an impossible amount of work to accomplish, or difficult deadlines or pressures, or unrealistic expectations, and that certainly can bring you into negative territory. Perhaps it's your environment—the temperature is not right, or it's drab and dreary, or noisy and hectic. Whatever these things are which tend to make you negative rather than positive, you need to identify them.
Then, take a look at those things and ask yourselves three questions
Can I confront this situation and try to change it? I find that most people gripe and complain, without making the first effort to find a solution. They give up without trying. I don't think you have grounds for complaint unless you've at least tried to find a solution. Is there some way I can compensate for this situation? For example, if you have a dreary office, how can you perk it up? Maybe plants and photos will help. Ask yourself what goes with your territory. Every job, every industry, every profession has certain aspects which simply go with the territory, and those you must learn to accept without allowing them to bring you down.
Think about the things that make you negative and ask God to give you the grace and wisdom to rise above them and be the positive person you need to be for his glory. That is a huge part of what it means to walk worthy of the Lord.
If you live up north, like I do, you develop a real love for evergreen trees, because in the midst of winter when everything else is bare and brown, that evergreen tree is still tall and green, giving color and life to the otherwise bleak winter scene. Jeremiah liked evergreens too. And he made a beautiful analogy for us using the evergreens. It's found in Jeremiah 17:7-8:
“But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him. They will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit.”
Evergreen Christians are Christians who walk worthy of the Lord. One whose roots are so firmly entrenched in the Lord, that nothing turns your leaves brown or keeps you from bearing fruit. It’s learning to trust God so completely that whatever heat comes your way, you will have absolutely no fear! To come to the place where no amount of heat could turn your leaves dry, because your faith in God is rooted so deeply.
Of course, a tree like this doesn't grow overnight. It takes time to get those roots down deep into that water supply. If you’re ever going to be an evergreen Christian, it will take time and discipline to get your roots firmly entrenched in God's water supply.
Are you in a situation that seems rather dry or cold or barren? Perhaps you're facing some unknowns on your job or even in your family. As you go through this experience, you have two choices: To worry and fear, and thereby shrivel up and get dry and brown. Or to trust God and push your roots deeper and deeper into that spring of living water, Jesus Christ. The only thing that makes sense is to trust God.
To walk worthy of the Lord, we need to be evergreen Christians, don’t we? People who bear fruit and stay green regardless of the circumstances. You can do it if your roots are firmly entrenched in Jesus Christ, deeper every day.
You’ve heard the cliché that our walk should match our talk. And that’s a pretty good way to describe what it means to walk worthy of the Lord. I think this was what James was saying in the second chapter of his letter:
“What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save them? Suppose a brother or a sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to them, ‘Go in peace; keep warm and well fed,’ but does nothing about their physical needs, what good is it? In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead. But someone will say, ‘You have faith; I have deeds.’ Show me your faith without deeds, and I will show you my faith by my deeds. You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that—and shudder” (James 2:14-19).
One of our primary objectives here at The Christian Working Woman is to hopefully inspire and help you live out your faith wherever you work—on the job. And walking worthy of the Lord on the job is making certain that our walk matches our talk—that we demonstrate our faith by our deeds.
I think of a woman who was a dear friend, LaVerne—now with Jesus—who worked with a very contentious and spiteful coworker. This coworker did everything she could to make LaVerne look bad to management—and for awhile she was successful at doing that. Naturally LaVerne was angry at the injustices done to her, but as she prayed about it, God just kept saying to her, “Wait, just wait for me to take care of this.” She waited—two years she waited, really struggling with the lies this person told about her. But then this coworker became very sick and was hospitalized for weeks. That’s when management realized that LaVerne was doing the work; she was the one doing good and they saw the coworker for who she was. LaVerne earned awards for the quality of her work. But she had to wait on God.
LaVerne walked the talk—she walked worthy of the Lord even in a very tough work environment. I’m quite sure she has heard Jesus say, “Well done, good and faithful servant.”
Walking worthy of the Lord is our standard, and the result is well worth the effort.
The theme we have chosen to focus on this month is “walking worthy.” This comes from several Bible passages that admonish us as Christ-followers to walk worthy of the Lord. But you may ask, what does it mean to walk worthy of the Lord. Well, think about it this way:
If I want to walk worthy of—let’s say—my parents, then I’m going to be a very honest person, a hard worker, a truly humble and generous person who cares about others, because that’s the way my parents lived their lives. Then my life would honor them—as we say, it would make them proud of me.
So, to walk worthy of the Lord is to make him proud of us—right? To hear him say, “Well done.” Here’s what the Bible says in Colossians 1:9-12:
“For this reason, since the day we heard about you, we have not stopped praying for you. We continually ask God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives, so that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and giving joyful thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of his holy people in the kingdom of light.”
This passage says walking worthy of the Lord means that you will do good works, reaching out and helping others. In addition, you will be continually increasing your knowledge of God as a student of the Word. And you will joyfully persevere even when things are tough and you will overflow with thankfulness.
I like the way Ed Elliott describes walking worthy:
“The ‘Worthy Walk’ commanded in Scripture is unlike any other journey you will travel. Working from the inside out, this journey starts with who we are then moves to what we do. To walk worthy, one must first understand and appreciate the great price God paid to redeem us. . . our redemption cost God His greatest treasure in heaven. The price He paid is indicative of how He sees us — with great value. The world may not attach much value to you. However, when you know your worth in God’s eyes, you will see yourself differently. It will be reflected in how you live your life.” (medium.com/@edelliott)
I like that—walking worthy is walking from the inside out.
A few decades age the message of needing to feel good about yourself and have really good self-esteem became an unquestioned truth for most people. The general theme of this teaching was that the troubles that plague our society—crime and addictions and failed marriages and abuse—all of it is attributable to low self-esteem. It was thought and taught that if we could just help people think about themselves in more positive ways, then they wouldn’t do these things and these societal problems would go away.
But as I looked at myself and others, God made it clear to me that self is not my solution; self is my problem! And looking back at the topics I covered early in this ministry, I see that as early as 1989 I was trying to communicate this truth. Trying to get people to feel good about themselves will not reach into the depths of their souls and bring healing. And that’s because each of us was born in sin, we commit sin willfully and we simply have a sin problem. The Bible says that there is nothing good in our selves—that all the righteous things we try to do are like filthy rags to God.
Well, that doesn’t exactly fit with the good self-esteem message, does it? Recently I found a booklet by Tim Keller—actually I think it’s a transcription of one of his sermons—entitled The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness. Tim does such a good job of explaining how this idea that low self-esteem is society’s big problem is just not true.
I want to share some of Tim’s thoughts, which are echoes of what I’ve tried to say for many years on this topic of self-esteem. The title of his booklet gives you a clue to where he’s going: The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness. When you and I can come to the place where life is not all about us, that we truly don’t think about ourselves first and foremost all the time, we are beginning to walk in the freedom that Jesus came to give us. That means we are walking worthy of the Lord and behaving like Jesus did and would. Believe me when I tell you: Self is your problem, not your solution, and when you grasp the incredible freedom of forgetting about yourself, you are going to love it.
Tim points out that up until the twentieth century, almost all cultures believed and taught that having too high a view of yourself was the root cause of all the evil in the world. Human pride and selfishness and greed and evil were presented as the cause for all bad behavior.
But in our modern western culture, we have developed a completely opposite idea. Now our educational systems, our counseling curriculums, our treatment of prisoners and much of our legislation starts with the viewpoint that all we need is to feel good about ourselves. Think of some evil in our world today—such as abuse of children. This philosophy would have us believe that this evil would go away if those who abused children didn’t have such low self-esteem.
Even secular psychologists have come to see the error of this belief system. Some have reported that there is no evidence that low self-esteem is a big problem in society, but rather that people with high self-esteem pose a greater threat to those around them. But this is hard for people to accept. As Tim writes: “The thing about the low self-esteem theory of misbehavior is that it is very attractive. You do not have to make any moral judgments in order to deal with society’s problems.”
Tim writes: “If someone has a problem with low self-esteem we, in our modern world, seem to have only one way of dealing with it. That is remedying it with high self-esteem. We tell someone that they need to see that they are a great person, they need to see how wonderful they are.”
Do you like people to tell you things like that? I sure do—who doesn’t? But guess what: No matter how many times people tell you that you are a great person and you are wonderful, or you tell yourself, it doesn’t change who you are, does it? The only way you and I can truly be changed into a person of worth is when we allo...
(Presented by Lisa BIshop)
Your position before God is holy, righteous, accepted. Because of Jesus, you have peace with God, you are forgiven and blameless! He calls you his beloved, dearly loved. So no matter what circumstances you are facing today, know that you are loved, seen, and highly favored. God is on your side and he is for you, working out your circumstances for your good and his glory.
This week we have been talking about living worthy of the gospel and today we are going to take a look at one more instruction the apostle Paul gives us in Ephesians 4:3: “Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.”
As followers of Jesus, as Christians, if we are serious about our relationship with the Lord we will be committed to living by his Word. And his word says, to be eager….be diligent, do everything you can to keep unity and peace with others.
It doesn’t mean absence of conflict or disagreement. It means when there is tension and conflict we act quickly to address and resolve it. We own our part. We both see where we have contributed and are responsible and we work towards reconciliation, towards unity, towards love and connection. This requires forgiveness. Unresolved hurt will result in bitterness and unforgiveness. And, God’s Word has a lot to say about both. We seek restoration in our relationships…and peace.
Peace binds us together; discord separates us. Unresolved tension and conflict destroys marriages and friendships. It disrupts boardrooms and classrooms. Unresolved conflict tears families apart.
In Ephesians 4:31-32 we read: “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”
Listen, the enemy, satan, does his best work when he gets us to be at odds with one another. Do not give the devil a foothold!
Whenever you are tempted towards bitterness and unforgiveness, when you feel discord and disconnection with someone, be alert to the devil’s schemes and say, “Not today satan. I am not going to let you use me to sow dissension and discord. I choose the Holy Spirit bond of peace.”
Romans 12:18 says, “If possible, so far as it depends upon you, live peaceably with all.”
And remember: “By his divine power, God has given us everything we need for living a godly life.”
(Click here to download a pdf of the entire week's devotional.)
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Are you living worthy of your calling in Christ Jesus?
In the book of Ephesians chapter 4, the apostle Paul instructs us to be patient, bearing with one another in love. The mark of a true follower of Christ, evidence that we love and follow Jesus, is when we demonstrate generous love toward one another, especially toward those who may try our patience.
The idea of bearing with one another is to show tolerance to each other, again and again. The NLT translation says, “be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love.” The Greek word means to endure or to put up with difficult people or circumstances.
This is an important expression of the love believers in Christ should have for one another, and for others. And yes, even for those we deem hard to love. The reality is, we are all hard to love at times. If we look to our example for love and holy living, Jesus, we see he loved and loves us when we are acting in ways that are “unlovable.”
When was the last time someone tried your patience? Maybe your spouse did something that irritated you. Your children did something that got on your last nerve. Or a neighbor, friend, parent, co-worker or boss tested your tolerance.
How did you respond? Did you respond with grace, and forbearance, dealing with the difficult person or situation without becoming angry? Or did you have a short fuse and say some things you regret?
Our words matter. We should not just say anything that comes out of our mouths. Proverbs 18:21 says, life and death are in the power of the tongue.
When your patience is tested, what comes out? We need to choose our words carefully, which requires the fruit of the Holy Spirit—self-control—which helps us with our tongue control. And it’s not just our words we need to be mindful of, impatience and lack of tolerance show up in silence, facial expressions, body language.
Our thoughts about people will determine how we treat them. It is not possible to be loving toward someone if our thoughts about them are unloving. Ask Jesus to reorder your thoughts and put them in alignment with his.
John 13:35 Jesus says, “By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”
When we demonstrate love and patience it is evidence that we have the Holy Spirit living in us. As we mature in our faith, our patience and love should also be maturing. People will see the way that we love one another, bear with one another, and say, “They must be followers of Jesus!”
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
When you hear the word meek, what comes to mind? Do you think weak? Timid? Being a doormat?
In Ephesians 4:2 the Apostle Paul’s call to walk worthy of our calling in Christ includes meekness.
Actually in most translations of this verse we see the word gentle, but the word gentle and meek are both translations of the Greek word praus (prowse) which means mildness of disposition, gentleness of spirit, meekness.
We see this same Greek word used in the familiar sermon on the mount in Matthew 5:5 when Jesus says, “Blessed are the prowse - the meek, the gentle - for they shall inherit the earth.”
Matthew 11:29 says “Take My yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle (prowse) and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” Since Jesus is our example and we are called to follow and image him, that means we follow his lead in gentleness and meekness.
So what does it mean to be gentle, to be meek? We know that Jesus was not a pushover. He had some pretty poignant and convicting things to say in his lifetime. He was not all rainbows and butterflies but he did model strength under control, and that is meekness. When he became angry it was at the right time, in the right measure, and for the right reason.
I would suffice to say that a majority of us do not have the level of constraint or strength under control when we come face to face with a co-worker that has gotten on our last nerve, or when we work for an overly demanding boss or with an unreliable team member. Our tendency can be to lash out. To lose our temper when we are driven to the edge.
To see another portrait of meekness we can look to James 1:19–21 which says, “Know this, my beloved brethren. Let every man be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger, for the anger of man does not work the righteousness of God.” I once heard it said that “meekness is the power to absorb adversity and criticism without lashing back.”
How and with whom will you demonstrate meekness? Where will you display gentleness and live in the likeness of Jesus?
What blessing comes to you when gentleness lives in you! (Matthew 5:5 The Message)
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
In Ephesians 4:2 Paul says, “be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.”
Ok—first off, did you notice the word completely? That’s a REALLY high bar Paul is setting for us as followers of Jesus. He didn’t say be sort of humble, a little bit gentle, be patient when you feel like it, only bear with people in love when it’s easy. Paul uses a word that means, each and every time, with everyone, in all things and always!
I don’t know about you but I can already recall a couple of times this past week where I didn’t meet this gospel standard.
You and I cannot live our high calling in our own strength. We need Jesus and the working of the Holy Spirit in our lives. When we read God’s Word, it is the standard for living as a follower of Jesus and God knows that we are all works in progress. Our lives are a constant work of God’s grace and sanctification, conforming our hearts, minds and lives to the will of God, as we daily strive to become more and more like Christ.
Lamentations 3:40 instructs us to test and examine our ways and return to the Lord. To take a good look at the way we’re living and reorder our lives under God. So as we are called to be humble, let’s invite the Lord to examine our ways and highlight where we have missed the mark.
When Paul says to be humble it means not proud or arrogant, thinking that you are better than someone else. If I am honest I wouldn’t say I lack humility, but when I am reminded of the definition of being humble, I am quickly confronted with the fact that I can be judgmental and that is a form of lacking humility. Someone will do or say something that I don’t agree with and it can be easy to think I am better than them. It’s the “get the log out of your own eye first” that we see in Matthew chapter 7. There are a lot of us walking around with logs in our eyes but we keep pointing the finger at each other. I wonder what the world would be like if we all examined our lives and ate some humble pie before pointing out the faults in others.
My friend has a saying that really hit home for me, “If we both took the log out of our own eyes, we could build a bridge.”
Where is humility lacking in your life? Let’s aim to give a true picture of Jesus and be humble.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
Are you living a life worthy of the Lord? Have you ever wondered what it means to live a worthy life?
Often we are tempted to measure our lives by our achievements, financial success, our relational status, or perhaps climbing the corporate ladder. But let’s look to God’s Word to see what it says about living a worthy life.
In Paul’s letter to followers of Jesus in Ephesus he says, “I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received” (Ephesians 4:1). What does he mean?
Living worthy doesn’t mean defining your value or earning your worth or status. That has already been declared by God. By the blood of Jesus you have been made whole, holy, righteous and worthy. You are 100% approved. Living worthy isn’t about earning God’s favor. You already have it because of Jesus. That is an amazing truth.
Living a life worthy of the Lord is not about our position before God. It is about our conduct before God and others, The way we live our lives. When Paul urges believers to live a life worthy of the calling they have received, he is saying, “live in such a way that you are a credit to the message of Christ. Behave as a citizen of heaven. Live in a godly way that reflects Jesus.”
As the Passion translation says, “walk holy, in a way that is suitable to your high rank, given to you in your divine calling.”
When you and I live in a manner worthy of the gospel it means we stand out—we live set apart. People look into your life and can tell that you reflect gospel principles. There are far too many people who claim to be Christians but their lifestyle, words, choices, behaviors and actions reflect anything but Christ. When we are true followers of Jesus we read the Bible, obey God’s instructions, and grow more and more in the likeness of Jesus. We don’t conform to the patterns of the world or social norms. We conform to Christ.
If your co-workers were to look in on your life and conduct, would they know that you love and follow Jesus? Do you respond differently under pressure, act gracefully in challenging circumstances, display kindness when others criticize? Would your neighbor notice there is something different about you? When there is a long line at the checkout counter, would the store clerk experience Jesus in you?
When we live worthy of our calling, we live as one loved, chosen and appointed by God to put the glory of God on display.
(Presented by Lisa Bishop)
It is so vital that you and I are intentionally investing time to be in God’s Word, immersing ourselves in the truth of the Bible. Isaiah 55:11 reminds us that when God sends out his Word it always produces fruit. When we read and meditate on God’s divine instruction, the truth of who God is and his character, who we are in him and the life he has empowered us to live…as we invite and surrender to the Holy Spirit at work in us, we are guaranteed a productive return.
There are so many investments we make today, with our time and resources, with our finances. And we will not always get the return on investment we hoped for. BUT… the investment we can count on is spending time with Jesus, letting God’s Word penetrate, renew and transform our hearts, minds and ways of being and living. God promises that his Word will accomplish all he wants it to, and it will prosper everywhere he sends it.
One of the verses I have memorized over the last several years is 1 Thessalonians 5:11: “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.” Paul tells the church in Thessalonica to “encourage one another and build one another up, just as they are doing.” He is making an assumption about believers in Jesus, that they are in fact encouraging one another in God’s truth. That should be true of us, that we are encouraged and built up in our faith and we are an encouragement to others. Which means we need Christian community. (As a side note - if you are not part of a Bible preaching church and small group Bible study may I kindly encourage you to participate in one!) To be encouraged and built up in our faith, it is necessary that we are part of a Christian community. It is also essential that we make it a daily habit of abiding in Jesus.
What does it mean to abide in Jesus?
I was listening to a podcast and the speaker said, your life is a reflection of who you spend the most time with. In other words, tell me who you are hanging out with, and I will tell you who you will become. He was saying that the people we surround ourselves with on a daily basis will influence our lives, our thoughts, our behavior and actions.
Think about the three to four people you spend the most time with. Do they encourage you in your faith and to exhibit Christ-likeness? When people spend time with you, are they encouraged to love and follow Jesus?
Our lives will reflect who we spend time with. And the most important relationship that you and I as believers have is our relationship with Jesus. When we spend time with him, when we abide in him, our lives will reveal and exhibit Christ. And when we display Christ in our lives, we are living out our purpose, our highest and greatest calling. We are putting his glory on display and drawing people to him.
And when we abide in Christ, we live our lives set apart, we bear fruit.
Jesus said, “Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.” (John 15:4-5).
Jesus paints the metaphor of abiding and compares it to a vine and branches. Parts of California are known as wine country where there are miles of vineyards. When you look at the vineyards you can see thick vines with several branches growing off of them. The branches that are healthy and connected to the vine have beautiful and juicy grapes growing from them. There are also some branches of grapes that have broken apart from the vine and have started to wither and shrivel up. They are no longer good for producing what they were intended to produce.
When Jesus uses this picture of a vine and branches and abiding, he is saying that he is the vine and we are the branches that must remain connected to him if we want our lives to produce healthy fruit...
We’ve all heard and said a lot of “Happy New Years” lately right? Well, what do we mean when we wish someone happiness for the new year?
Often when someone says “Happy New Year,” they mean “Good Luck,” because they see happiness as a consequence of good things happening to you. If you have the good luck not to have health problems, or money problems, or emotional issues, then you will be happy—so they think—and therefore they are wishing you a year filled with good luck, nice circumstances.
Others think of a Happy New Year as one filled with prosperity—you have a good job earning good money. You are successful in your pursuit of financial stability and you have no money worries. To them that would constitute a happy new year. Still others think that a happy new year is one where your internal emotional state is good—you have good self-esteem and you are emotionally strong.
What would be your definition of a Happy New Year? If you could engineer the next 353 days of 2022, how would you design those days to make you happy?
Here’s the truth—you cannot engineer the next 300 or so days. You don’t know what the future holds. Perhaps you’ll have very happy circumstances and life will prove easy and good. But as soon as tomorrow, life could take a drastic turn in the wrong direction and your circumstances could change overnight. We have all lived through that since early 2020, haven’t we?
Your life—and mine—is in the hands of our God. As the old song says, “I know not what the future holds, but I know who holds the future.” If you live in 2022 for the purpose of pleasing the Lord, abiding in Christ and trusting the God who loves you, then this new year will bring you joy and contentment and peace—and yes, some happiness.
So, whatever this year holds for you, I pray you will know Jesus better at the end of 2022 than you do now, and you will trust and love him more as you learn how much he loves you. That’s the best year you could possibly have.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
If you would like "My One Word for 2022" reminder card, click here to download the pdf.
I wonder if you have ever thought about the power that is released when you become a thankful person. Let me tell you some of the great things that will happen:
People will like you much better. Thankful people are nice to be around. Your relationships will improve. You'll have more friends. Your energy level will go up. It's true, because when you're thankful, you unleash a lot of good energy that is often wasted on complaining and negativism. You will do more work in less time. And that's going to make you a better employee, which will make your boss happy! I won't go so far as to say you'll get a raise, but then again—who knows? Your stress will go down. I'm not making this up. When you are being thankful, you are thinking about the good things in your life, and that keeps you from focusing on the negative things. It's like a release valve on a pressure cooker—you will see your stress go down. Your face will be prettier—or more handsome, whichever you prefer! Think about it—when you are thankful, you're not worried or fretting, and those things cause lines in our faces and age us! You'll look younger! Your posture will improve. When you're thankful, you stand up straighter. When you're negative, your shoulders tend to stoop and your back curves.
There's power in thankfulness. You have much to gain. But way above and beyond all of these, here's the most important reason to be thankful:
You will honor and glorify Jesus Christ as he deserves. When you overflow with thankfulness, you tell the world what Jesus has done for you and you are a good ambassador for him. Not to mention, it pleases him to see your thankful heart.
That’s why I’m urging you to adopt this one word as your word for 2022: Thankfulness. Focus on it all year; pray it into your life; remind yourself every day to be thankful.
If you would like "My One Word for 2022" reminder card, click here to download the pdf.
I’m sure I don’t have to remind you that we’re five days into a New Year. This is a good time for you and me to ask ourselves: What is my personal theme for 2022? What attitude or characteristic do I want God to create in me this year? David prayed, “Create in me a new heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me” (Psalm 51:10). It’s a good prayer for us in this New Year.
A really good word to focus on all year is thankfulness. If you look at the sacrifices that are a part of the Mosaic law given by God, you'll discover that there were many sacrifices of thanksgiving. This was a ritual God put in place to remind his people that they were to be thankful people. We're no longer under the law, but we still need to be reminded to be thankful.
Here are some more practical ways to become a thankful person—to learn to practice thanksgiving.
Do the thankful alphabet. Start with A and go through Z, naming something starting with each letter for which you are thankful. You can have some fun with this; it's a great game to play in the car with your kids and you'll be teaching them to practice thankfulness. Make every Tuesday a “Thankful Tuesday” or each Thursday a “Thankful Thursday.” You can share this with your family or your co-workers and have some fun with it, but it will teach the joy of practicing thankfulness. Sing songs of thanksgiving. The Bible says to sing and make music in your heart to the Lord. Go for it. Begin every prayer time with thanksgiving. Psalm 100 tells us to enter the gates of the Lord with thanksgiving and enter his courts with praise. Whenever you enter into the presence of God, always enter with thanksgiving. Make the first words out of your mouth words of thankfulness.
I have found that this changes my prayer time. If I begin with all my needs and requests, I am self-focused. If I begin with thanksgiving—reciting some of the many things I have to be thankful for—I am God-focused. What a difference that makes in my time spent with God, and that in turn makes a difference in my day.
If you would like "My One Word for 2022" reminder card, click here to download the pdf.
Have you thought about a New Year’s resolution for 2022? I would suggest that you don’t need a resolution, you just need a word. One word that you will focus on all year. One word that says what you want God to do for you this year. One word that indicates an attitude and a commitment you’re willing to take on with God’s help.
Actually, I would like to suggest one word that would work for you and anybody else you know—and that one word is thankfulness. Just suppose you determine to make thankfulness the theme of your life in this new year. Just suppose that you are willing to put away the negative thoughts and the complaining spirit, and overflow with thankfulness throughout the year? How would that make 2022 different from 2021?
This is a characteristic I've been trying to cultivate more and more in my life because I want to be thankful for all my many, many blessings. But also because being thankful is a major stress buster! I'm not kidding; one of the best things you can do to reduce your stress, lower your blood pressure, and lengthen your life is to practice thankfulness.
Notice I said "practice thankfulness.” You see, it's really easy to get caught up in complaining because that's what we hear around us quite often. And we’ve all gone through—still going through—a worldwide pandemic that gave us lots to complain about, didn’t it? Don't you hear a good bit of griping and complaining where you work? Well, you might have caught that complaining disease without realizing it. So, you need to practice thankfulness.
Here are some suggestions to help you do that.
Put a sign on your desk or your screen saver or your refrigerator that says: “My one word for 2022: Thankfulness.” I think we just sometimes need simple reminders. It sure wouldn’t hurt. In fact, we've prepared a reminder like this that you can use, if you like. Put on thankfulness each morning before you leave home. While you're buttoning your shirt or putting on your shoes, just make a little ritual each day of saying, "And I'm also putting on thankfulness to wear all day today."
Very simple and easy things to do—but those little rituals and reminders could truly make a difference in your life in this new year.
If you would like "My One Word for 2022" reminder card, click here to download the pdf.
Christmas and New Year’s celebrations are over—I’m guessing that you survived nicely. We’re in a New Year. So, you think I’m going to talk about New Year’s resolutions, right?
Well, not really, because my experience is that those New Year’s resolutions last about a week, if that long. But I do have an idea—maybe even a challenge—for you as you face this new year of 2022. I suggest you choose this one word to be your theme for the year—and that one word is thankfulness.
Instead of making resolutions, for the past few years I’ve been choosing one word to focus on for the year—one word to think about and pray about and remember. For example, one year my one word was wisdom. Last year my one word was transition. And I prayed about those throughout the year because I desperately needed wisdom and last year was truly a year of transition for me and for our ministry.
Well, this year I want to suggest that it could make a huge difference in our lives and the lives of those around us if our one word was thankfulness. You can never over-emphasize the importance of being always thankful. Paul wrote to the Colossians: “So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live in him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness” (Colossians 2:6-7). Overflowing with thankfulness—that's what we should be if we have received Christ Jesus as our Lord and are continuing to grow in our faith. In other words, thankfulness is supposed to be a trademark of a Christian.
Now, ask yourself this question: Would people who know you well—who are around you often and see you in real-life environments regularly—would they describe you as a thankful person? Do you overflow with thankfulness? If something is overflowing, people would notice, don't you think?
Are you up for this challenge—to make thankfulness your one word for 2022? If so, I want to send you a sign you can put where you’ll see it often—a sign that says, “My one word for 2022: Thankfulness.”
If it’s going to be your one word this year, you’re going to need reminders around you all the time. So, I want to help you start this new year with a very thankful heart.
If you would like "My One Word for 2022" reminder card, click here to download the pdf.
While resolutions don’t seem to be the answer for most of us, I do believe that as the New Year begins, we have an opportunity to take stock of the past year and ask ourselves what we’d like to see happen in our lives as we face this new year of 2022. So, I suggest you choose one word that you will focus on throughout the year. One word that says what you want God to do for you this year. One word that indicates an attitude and a commitment you’re willing to take on with God’s help. Just one word—and then you put that word all around you, you pray about it everyday, you find Scripture that reinforces that one word, and you ask God to change you in 2022.
One of the first words I chose when I began this habit was wisdom. I was facing a new challenge in ministry, as we undertook to open a home for women who experienced sexual exploitation, and I knew that I was in over my head. I desperately needed wisdom. Well, James 1:5 says, “If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.” So, I prayed that verse into my life almost everyday, and God did indeed answer my prayers. Another year my one word was discernment, which is a little different from wisdom. I knew I needed to be able to discern God’s will and his voice in my life more clearly, and not be deceived by lies from the enemy. And that was very helpful.
I am now convinced that choosing one word to focus on for a year really gives God the opportunity to make some needed changes in us, to truly learn to seek God for what we need. So, I want to suggest that it could make a huge difference in your life, too. And if you don’t immediately know what one word to choose, let me suggest the one for 2022, and that is thankfulness. Paul wrote to the Colossians:
So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live in him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness (Colossians 2:6-7).
Overflowing with thankfulness—that should be true of us if we have received Christ Jesus as our Lord and are continuing to grow in our faith. In other words, thankfulness is supposed to be a trademark of a Christian.
Now, ask yourself this question: Would people who know you well—who are around you often and see you in real-life environments regularly—would they describe you as a thankful person? Do you overflow with thankfulness? If something is overflowing, people would notice, don't you think?
Just suppose you determine to make thankfulness the theme of your life in this new year. Just suppose that you are willing to put away the negative thoughts and the complaining spirit, and overflow with thankfulness throughout the year? How would that make 2022 different from 2021?
This is a characteristic I've been trying to cultivate more and more in my life because I want to be thankful for all my many, many blessings. But also because being thankful is a major stress buster! I'm not kidding; one of the best things you can do to reduce your stress, lower your blood pressure, and lengthen your life is to practice thankfulness.
Notice I said, "practice thankfulness.” You see, it's really easy to get caught up in complaining because that's what we hear around us quite often. We’ve come through two of the toughest years most of us have faced and our lives have been turned upside down in many ways. So, complaining and worrying and fear have found their way into our minds quite often, isn’t that true? You hear words of hopelessness and complaining a lot, where you work and elsewhere. Well, you might have been caught up in that complaint mode without realizing it. So, you need to practice thankfulness.
Here are some suggestions to help you do that.
Put a sign on your desk or your screen saver or your refrigerator that says: “My one word for 2022: Thankfulness.” I think we just sometimes need simple reminders. It sure wouldn’t hurt.
To those of you who may be struggling with loneliness at this time, let me remind you that it’s part of being human. Christians are vulnerable to feelings of loneliness and it is not necessarily a spiritual issue. Loneliness is a human condition that is common to everyone at some times in their lives.
However, if you deal with loneliness in the wrong way, it could lead you to form harmful relationships, to settle for inappropriate relationships, to go places and do things you know are not right just to try to find companionship and stop those feelings of loneliness. We all need friends and a support system, but the wrong friends will do you far more harm than good.
And keep this in mind: If you try to fill up that lonely place in your heart with people, before looking first to Jesus Christ, you are setting yourself up for further disappointment and it could simply make your loneliness worse rather than better. I had to learn this some years ago, when I had to make a choice to first seek the presence of Christ, to get to know him better, to allow his love to become more real and more powerful in my life, instead of trying to solve my loneliness by desperately looking for a meaningful relationship.
One way to combat feelings of loneliness is to quote scripture and fill your mind with truth that can set you free. In verse 6 of Psalm 42, we read, "My soul is downcast within me; therefore I will remember you...” Now this is a very good technique and habit for all of us to learn. When we feel lonely, we should then force ourselves to remember and recite out loud God's goodness to us in times past.
Are you having a tough time today, feeling alone and lonely? Then, stop right now and talk to yourself; find some place where you can say something like, "Look, Mary, what is your problem? The God of all the universe loves you and cares for you, he's met your need time and again. Remember that Jesus will never leave you or forsake you, and you have a wonderful Friend in Jesus.” Finding relief from loneliness is often a choice we make to replace wrong thoughts with right thoughts and decide to live in the truth of God’s Word.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
It's amazing how many people are very lonely. Psalm 68:6 says "God makes a home for the lonely; he leads out the prisoners into prosperity. Only the rebellious dwell in a parched land.” I have found this verse to be exactly true in my life. As I allowed God to make a home for me and to accept his presence as sufficient in my life, I was truly set free from the awful heaviness of loneliness.
That verse says only the rebellious dwell in a parched land. When we refuse to allow God to be our cure for loneliness, when we continue to try to do it our way and fill the empty void with people and activities, we'll continue to find loneliness our companion. Your feelings of loneliness may be because you are still rebelling against God's answers. You don't like the idea of learning to let him fill up your empty time and change your lonely feelings. As long as you continue to rebel, you will continue to live in that parched land of loneliness.
But there’s no doubt that God created us for fellowship and companionship, and we need people in our lives, too. When Jesus was facing crucifixion, he took his three closest companions with him while he prayed. He needed God’s presence and he needed their presence and support. The Apostle Paul spoke of his need to be with his companions and his encouragers.
If you are lonely because you don’t have a good friend or friends, or they’re not nearby, I would remind you that in order to have friends, you have to reach out to others and be a friend. So, ask yourself what you could do for someone else to be their friend, to meet their need, instead of waiting for someone to be your friend. We reap what we sow—that’s a biblical principle. So, if you want friendships, sow friendships; become a friend to others.
Loneliness can be very crippling, but you can take positive steps—by God’s grace—to overcome those depressing feelings of loneliness. Of course, the most important step to take is to spend time developing your relationship with Jesus through Bible study and prayer. He is a friend who sticks closer than a brother, and believe me, He is capable of filling that lonely space inside of you.
Are you a lonely person? With the presence of Christ in our lives, we need not be lonely, no matter how alone we may be.
Why, then, are so many Christians lonely? Because they don't know the presence of Christ in their lives as God intended them to. That could be because there is some sin that keeps them from sweet, intimate fellowship with God. If you're a disobedient Christian, that could be the cause of your loneliness since it's destroying the sense of God's presence in your life.
Many Christians don't know God's presence because they don't spend time with him. If you're not saturating your life with God's Word and prayer, then don't be surprised to discover that you are frequently lonely.
Many are lonely because they refuse to change their thinking about aloneness. They're like the little boy who was afraid of going to bed in the dark. His father said to him, "Son, you don't have to be afraid. Jesus is with you.” And the boy replied, "I know, Dad, but I want someone with skin on.” So often when I share with a lonely person that Jesus can dispel their loneliness, their non-verbal reaction is: "Yes, but that's not the way I want it to be. I want someone with skin on."
Not long after I had come back to God and made him Lord of my life, I was sitting in my office one Wednesday when it occurred to me that I was facing a weekend with no plans! For singles—or at least for me at that time—that was the worst of all fates, and in a slight panic I reached for my phone to start calling friends. And as I started to dial, the Holy Spirit quietly said to me, "Can't you trust me? The weekends are in my control just as much as the other days. You can make it through a weekend alone—WITH ME!"
Somewhat fearfully, I said, "Okay, Lord, I'll prove that you are God of the weekends, too.” So, I made plans to be alone with God for those two weekend evenings. There were some tense moments when I again found myself thinking, "Something must be wrong with me, or I wouldn't be by myself on a Saturday evening.”
But I took my Bible, sat down and asked God to again show me he was God, even of the weekends. I ran into God as my refuge, and I was free. Free from the need to have someone around all the time; free from those self-pitying, self-centered feelings of loneliness. I’m married now—after many years as a single—and I’m just so glad I learned that lesson long ago. God took the fear and the desperateness of loneliness away from me. He wants to do the same for you.
We must recognize that activity, people, marriage are not the cures for loneliness. If they are, then we are doomed to a roller-coaster life, because none of those things are guaranteed to us. Activities ebb and flow, people come in and out of our lives, the most wonderful marriage in the world can be severed through death.
If you're lonely, are you willing to let God change your thinking about being alone? That's where we begin. But it takes more than that. God recognized our need to know that we are not alone, our need for companionship, our need to be loved and to feel secure. And he has provided for that need completely. Hebrews 13:5 says, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” If you can learn to take this incredible promise and apply it to your life daily, you can know freedom from those awful feelings of loneliness.
Please believe what I'm telling you: His presence is all you need to dispel loneliness. I promise you, he can flood your life with his presence, and you can know the real, long-term cure for loneliness.
Let me share with you a poem which says this so well: There is a mystery in human hearts; And though we be encircled by a host Of those who love us well, and are beloved, To every one of us, from time to time, There comes a sense of utter loneliness: Our dearest friend is stranger to our joy, And cannot realize our bitterness. "There is not one who really understands, Not one to enter into all I feel." Such is the cry of each of us in turn; We wander in a "solitary way." No matter what or where our lot may be, Each heart, mysterious even to itself, Must live its inner life in solitude. And would you know the reason why this is? It is because the Lord desires our love: In every heart he wishes to be first. He therefore keeps the secret key himself, To open all its chambers and to bless With perfect sympathy and holy peace, Each solitary soul that comes to him. So when we feel this loneliness, it is The voice of Jesus saying, "Come to me"; And every time we are "not understood," It is a call to us to come again; For Christ alone can satisfy the soul, And those who walk with Him from day to day, Can never have a "solitary way." With Christ you don't have to feel that ever-abiding despair of being lonely. He has come to abolish it, and he is totally capable of doing just that, if you will allow him to.
I'm quite certain that there are many of you who are lonely. I know the feeling. It's that empty, aching spot in the pit of your stomach, that quiet desperateness that makes life seem meaningless and makes you feel worthless. Loneliness always seems worse during holiday seasons, but God’s Word shows us how to cope with it.
Someone has said that “All man’s history is an endeavor to shatter his loneliness.” We are designed by God for fellowship, for companionship and when it is missing, it affects our motivation, our self-respect, our happiness—almost every part of our lives.
However, we must recognize that loneliness and aloneness are two different things. You can be lonely in a crowd or in a group of friends, or with a mate or friend right there with you. Or you can be all by yourself for extended periods of time and yet not be lonely. Loneliness is a feeling, not a set of circumstances.
Our culture has conditioned us to believe that if you are a worthy person, if you're normal, you won't be alone very much. Therefore, aloneness makes many people feel unwanted, unloved, unnecessary, unworthy—and that is the content and the pain of loneliness.
A single woman in her late twenties shared an experience with me which I think points out our society's attitude about aloneness. Since her church had no class for singles, she joined in with the young couples group, which was taught by the pastor's wife. One Sunday she didn't make it to Sunday School, and her teacher said to her, "I'm so sorry you weren't at Sunday School today. I was really counting on you being there because I knew you'd have lots of good input for our discussion, since we were talking about loneliness today."
People automatically assume that being single means you're lonely because they think that being alone is the worst thing in the world.
This mistaken notion about aloneness causes people to do the most incredible things to avoid being by themselves. I know, because I've done some of them. I've gone to places I should never have gone to, I've been with people I should never have been with, I've spent money I never should have spent, just to avoid being alone.
Christmas Meditations by John Piper
Merry Christmas! We’ve come through the past almost two years of a pandemic and our worlds have been turned topsy-turvy, haven’t they? But this is Christmas Day, and I hope it is a day for you to focus on all the good and let the worries and troubles of these past months take a break.
Today I’m going to share some Christmas meditations for you by John Piper. I believe they will encourage you and bless you on this Christmas morning.
A Big God for a Little People In those days Caesar Augustus issued a decree that a census should be taken of the entire Roman world. (This was the first census that took place while Quirinius was governor of Syria.) And everyone went to their own town to register. So Joseph also went up from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to Bethlehem the town of David, because he belonged to the house and line of David. He went there to register with Mary, who was pledged to be married to him and was expecting a child. —Luke2:1-5 Have you ever thought what an amazing thing it is that God ordained beforehand that the Messiah be born in Bethlehem (as the prophecy in Micah 5 shows); and that he so ordained things that when the time came, the Messiah’s mother and legal father were living in Nazareth; and that in order to fulfill his word and bring two little people to Bethlehem that first Christmas, God put it in the heart of Caesar Augustus that all the Roman world should be enrolled each in his own town?
Have you ever felt, like me, little and insignificant in a world of four billion people, where all the news is of big political and economic and social movements and of outstanding people with lots of power and prestige? If you have, don’t let that make you disheartened or unhappy. For it is implicit in Scripture that all the mammoth political forces and all the giant industrial complexes, without their even knowing it, are being guided by God, not for their own sake but for the sake of God’s little people—the little Mary and the little Joseph who have to be got from Nazareth to Bethlehem. God wields an empire to bless his children. Do not think, because you experience adversity, that the hand of the Lord is shortened. It is not our prosperity but our holiness that he seeks with all his heart. And to that end, he rules the whole world. As Proverbs 21:1 says: “The king’s heart is a stream of water in the hand of the Lord; he turns it wherever he will.” He is a big God for little people, and we have great cause to rejoice that, unbeknownst to them, all the kings and presidents and premiers and chancellors of the world follow the sovereign decrees of our Father in heaven, that we, the children, might be conformed to the image of his Son, Jesus Christ.
Calvary Road He went there to register with Mary, who was pledged to be married to him and was expecting a child. While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no guest room available for them. — Luke 2:5-7 Now you would think that if God so rules the world as to use an empire-wide census to bring Mary and Joseph to Bethlehem, he surely could have seen to it that a room was available in the inn. Yes, he could have. And Jesus could have been born into a wealthy family. He could have turned stone into bread in the wilderness. He could have called 10,000 angels to his aid in Gethsemane. He could have come down from the cross and saved himself. The question is not what God could do, but what he willed to do. God’s will was that though Christ was rich, yet for your sake he became poor. The “No Vacancy” signs over all the motels in Bethlehem were for your sake. “For your sake he became poor.” God rules all things—even motel capacities—for the sake of his children. The Calvary road begins with a “No Vacancy” sign in Bethlehem and ends with the spitting and sco...
What is the very best gift you can give on this Christmas Day? I would suggest that the best gift is the gift of forgiveness, for it not only is a wonderful gift to give someone else, it is a gift you give yourself, too. I’ve been telling this story of how a young boy took his hard-earned money to buy a tree for his family one Christmas, and his mother, under stress from financial worries, berated him for spending his money foolishly. Now, many years later, his mom is visiting him and his family. As he is up late on Christmas Eve, he hears a noise in the kitchen. The story continues.
I heard a noise in the kitchen and discovered that it was mom. She couldn’t sleep either and had gotten up to make herself a cup of hot tea—which was her remedy for just about everything. As she waited for the water to boil, she walked into the living room and discovered me there. She saw my open Bible and asked me what I was reading. When I told her, she asked if I would read it to her and I did.
When the kettle began to whistle, she went and made her tea. She came back, and we started to visit. I told her how happy I was that she was with us for Christmas and how I wished that Dad could have lived to see his grandchildren and to enjoy this time because he always loved Christmas so. It got very quiet for a moment and then she said, "Do you remember that time on Twelve Mile Road when you bought that tree with your paper route money?"
"Yes," I said, "I’ve just been thinking about it you know."
She hesitated for a long moment, as though she were on the verge of something that was bottled up so deeply inside her soul that it might take surgery to get it out. Finally, great tears started down her face and she cried, "Oh, son, please forgive me. That time and that Christmas have been a burden on my heart for twenty-five years. I wish your dad were here so I could tell him how sorry I am for what I said. Your dad was a good man and it hurts me to know that he went to his grave without ever hearing me say that I was sorry for that night. Nothing will ever make what I said right, but you need to know that your dad never did have any money sense.
“We were two months behind in our house payments, we had no money for groceries, and that tree was the last straw. I took it all out on you. It doesn’t make what I did right, but I hoped that someday, when you were older, you would understand. I’ve wanted to say something for ever so long and I’m so glad it’s finally out.” Well, we both cried a little and held each other and I forgave her—it wasn’t hard, you know.
Then we talked for a long time, and I did understand; I saw what I had never seen and the bitterness and sadness that had gathered up in me for all those years gradually washed away. It was marvelously simple.
The great gifts of this season—or any season—can’t be put under the tree; you can’t wear them or eat them or drive them or play with them. We spend so much time on the lesser gifts but the great gifts are like the one gift—the gift that began back there in Bethlehem. You can’t buy them, and they’re not on anybody’s shopping list. They come as he came—quietly, freely, unexpectedly—and if you have unforgiveness in your life that is making you miserable, why not give the gift of forgiveness and let Jesus show you how to forgive those who have hurt you?
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
Yesterday I began telling a story about the best Christmas gift you can ever give—the gift of forgiveness. It’s the story about a young boy who so wanted a Christmas tree for his home, but his folks couldn’t afford it. He, however, collected some money from his newspaper route and bought a tree to take home. He was so excited, it was a beautiful tree, but when his mom saw the tree, she didn’t share his enthusiasm. I continue his story.
"Where did you get the money?" she asked. Her tone was accusing and it began to dawn on me that this wasn’t going to turn out as I had planned.
"From my paper route." I explained about the customer who had paid me.
"And you spent the whole eight dollars on this tree?" she exclaimed. She went into a tirade about how stupid it was to spend my money on a dumb tree that would be thrown out and burned in a few days.
She told me how irresponsible I was and how I was just like my dad with all those foolish, romantic, noble notions about fairy tales and happy endings and that it was about time I grew up and learned some sense about the realities of life and how to take care of money and spend it on things that were needed and not on silly things.
She said that I was going to end up in the poorhouse because I believe in stupid things like Christmas trees, things that didn’t amount to anything. I just stood there. My mother had never talked to me like that before and I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I felt awful and I began to cry. Finally, she reached out and snapped off the porch light.
"Leave it there," she said. "Leave that tree there till it rots, so every time we see it, we’ll all be reminded of how stupid the men in this family are.” Then she stormed up the stairs to her bedroom and we didn’t see her until the next day. Dad and I brought the tree in and we made a stand for it. He got out the box of ornaments and we decorated it as best as we could; but men aren’t too good at things like that, and besides, it wasn’t the same without mom. There were a few presents under it by Christmas day—although I can’t remember a single one of them—but Mom wouldn’t have anything to do with it. It was the worst Christmas I ever had.
Fast forward to today. Judi and I married in August of 1963, and dad died on October 10 of that year. Over the next eight years, we lived in many places. Mom sort of divided up the year—either living with my sister Mary or with us. In 1971 we were living in Wichita, Kansas. Mom was staying with us during the holidays. On Christmas Eve I stayed up very late. I was totally alone with my thoughts, alternating between joy and melancholy, and I got to thinking about my paper route, that tree, what my mother had said to me and how Dad had tried to make things better.
Christmas is gift-giving time! If we’re honest, we all look forward to opening a gift or two at Christmas, don’t we? I want to tell you about the very best gift you can give someone else and at the same time, give to yourself—the gift of forgiveness. Here’s a story that illustrates this as told by John William Smith.
The Christmas of 1949 we didn’t have a tree. My dad had as much pride as anybody, I suppose, so he wouldn’t just say that we couldn’t afford one. When I mentioned it, my mother said that we weren’t going to have one this year, that we couldn’t afford one, and even if we could—it was stupid to clutter up your house with a dead tree. I wanted a tree badly though, and I thought—in my naïve way—that if we had one, everybody would feel better.
Taking matters into my own hands, about three days before Christmas, I was out collecting for my paper route. It was fairly late—long after dark—it was snowing and very cold. I went to the apartment building to try to catch a customer who hadn’t paid me for nearly two months—she owed me seven dollars. Much to my surprise, she was home. She invited me in and not only did she pay me, she gave me a dollar tip! It was a windfall for me—I now had eight whole dollars.
What happened next was totally unplanned. On the way home, I walked past a Christmas tree lot and the idea hit me. The selection wasn’t very good because it was so close to the holiday, but there was this one real nice tree. It had been a very expensive tree and no one had bought it; now it was so close to Christmas that the man was afraid no one would. He wanted ten dollars for it, but when I—in my gullible innocence—told him I only had eight, he said he might sell it for that. I really didn’t want to spend the whole eight dollars on the tree, but it was so pretty that I finally agreed.
I dragged it all the way home—about a mile, I think—and I tried hard not to damage it or break off any limbs. The snow helped to cushion it, and it was still in pretty good shape when I got home. You can’t imagine how proud and excited I was. I propped it up against the railing on our front porch and went in.
My heart was bursting as I announced that I had a surprise. I got Mom and Dad to come to the front door and then I switched on the porch light. Surprise!!
"Where did you get that tree?" my mother exclaimed. But it wasn’t the kind of exclamation that indicates pleasure. "I bought it up on Main Street. Isn’t it just the most perfect tree you ever saw?" I said, trying to maintain my enthusiasm.
"Where did you get the money?" Her tone was accusing and it began to dawn on me that this wasn’t going to turn out as I had planned.
Merry Christmas! How many times have you heard that already this season? It just wouldn't seem like Christmas if we didn't get some cards with those familiar words on them, or hear someone say to us "Merry Christmas!”
It's a good word—merry—but not everyone is merry at Christmas. However, it is possible as believers to be merry even when the circumstances are not good. Here is the secret to a merry heart.
“Whoever refreshes others will be refreshed” (Proverbs 11:25b). The Bible is packed full of promises for people who give of themselves to others. You can have a merry heart by helping others have a merry heart. And how can you do that?
SMILE! This is so simple, yet so powerful. Proverbs 15:30a (NLT) says "A cheerful look brings joy to the heart...” There's no one who can say that they cannot give a cheerful look. You can give a smile to people, regardless of who they are, who you are, or how you feel. Smiles are always legal, always welcome.
If you have never developed the habit of smiling, you can change. Find ways to remind yourself to smile at other people. Pray about it each day. "Lord, give me a cheerful look, so that I can bring joy to the hearts of others." Smiling doesn't cost a penny, doesn't even take any of your time. Nothing could be easier to do. But you'll have to remind yourself!
I have learned that my natural look is evidently not a happy look. It seems when I'm concentrating on something, I look as though I'm worried or upset. It used to make me angry that people would draw those conclusions about me. I thought they were wrong for jumping to conclusions. However, I now realize it's my job to keep a joyful look on my face. I had a bad habit to break. I had to reprogram myself so that my natural look is more joyful, not worried or preoccupied.
Remember, a cheerful look brings joy to the heart. It brings joy to the heart of those who look at you. And guess what, it brings joy to your own heart. Have you looked in a mirror lately? Give the gift of a smile today. It can work miracles.
“Merry" is a word we hear a lot at this time of year. Not my name, Mary, but merry as in Merry Christmas. Have you noticed we don't use that word much at other times of the year? It seems to be a word reserved for Christmas.
Well, it's a traditional word, an old-fashioned word. It seems to go automatically with "Christmas.” What do we mean when we say, "Merry Christmas"? Do we mean anything at all—or is it like "How are you today?"
Supposedly we're saying, "I hope your Christmas is happy.” We like to think of Christmas as a merry time for everyone. But for many people, Christmas is not merry at all. In fact it can be one of the saddest, loneliest times of all the year.
For instance, if you have no family to be with at Christmas, you may not feel so merry. If you can't make it to your family's celebration, it may not be merry. If your family is separated by more than miles—by divorce or death—or if your celebration of Christmas is not loving and warm, your Christmas may not be so merry. If you have financial difficulties, Christmas may not seem merry this year.
So, at a time when everyone is proclaiming that this is a "merry" time of year—a time for all to be happy and jovial—you may be acutely and painfully reminded that your circumstances are not conducive for a Merry Christmas.
How can you be merry this Christmas, regardless of the circumstances? How can you have a merry Christmas in spite of your problems and trials, in spite of the hardships of Covid? In spite of your own personal hardships and tough times?
We usually hear a message or a sermon at this time of year about keeping the Christmas spirit all year long. Well, wouldn't it be something if Christians kept a merry heart all year long? A heart overflowing with thankfulness, joy, caring, compassion and love.
If you have a merry heart, you will have a merry Christmas. Nobody can take away your joy if your heart is merry. Circumstances won't affect it; people can't rob you of joy if your heart is merry. So, I truly pray that you will have a Merry Christmas because your heart is filled with God’s goodness.
We began to think about what made Mary the favored one of God. We noted that she had an accepting heart, one that remained simple and uncomplicated. And she had a trusting heart, because she had obviously been well trained in the Word of God and knew its promises and prophecies. So, when this incredible message came to her from Gabriel that she would bear this miracle baby, she was prepared to trust because she knew God's Word.
Let's look further at this story to get a better understanding of the heart of Mary. When the angel left her, she went to the one person with whom she could share the news, the one person she knew would understand, her cousin Elizabeth. Elizabeth was bearing a miracle baby, too—a child given to her in old age, beyond child-bearing years.
It's interesting to note how Zacharias, Elizabeth's husband, reacted when the angel told him that his wife would have a special baby. He said: "How shall I know this for certain?"
He focused on the facts as he saw them: his body was old, his wife's body was old, and they could not have children. He doubted the angel's message and asked for a further sign. Because of his lack of faith, he became speechless and remained that way until his son was born.
I'm afraid Zacharias' reaction is more like what mine would have been, how about you? He considers the circumstances and loses sight of the power of God to change circumstances, and he does a foolish thing—he fails to trust God.
Let's learn a lesson from Zacharias and set our hearts to trust God no matter what. Don't look at the circumstances when God gives you a promise. God is never limited by any physical circumstances. Gabriel said it to Mary, very succinctly: "For nothing will be impossible with God.”
Well, back to Mary. When Mary comes into Elizabeth's presence, Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit and immediately recognized Mary's news even before Mary could tell her. She calls Mary blessed, and Mary answers with one of the most beautiful passages in all of Scripture. It is commonly called The Magnificat, and I encourage you to read it anew this Christmas season, as found in Luke 1:46-55.
It is beautiful poetry, but far beyond its literary beauty is its content. Remember, Mary was a young girl, with probably no formal education. But she had obviously been taught the Scriptures, for as she recites her praise to God, she draws from several Old Testament sources.
Again, we get a look at the heart of Mary. It is an accepting heart, a trusting heart, and it is a heart of praise. Many women would have focused on the negatives of this situation. Many would have run into Elizabeth and said: "Oh, Elizabeth, what am I going to do? What will I tell people? Will you shelter me? What will Joseph say? Help me, please Elizabeth.”
But Mary had an eternal point of view and a total trust in God, so that she was able to see the real importance of her position and was able to thank and praise God for his eternal purposes, though her life on earth was very difficult.
What a wonderful role model this simple lady is for us today. Do you have a heart of praise? That's what you need to find favor with God, as Mary did. How much time do you spend each day simply praising him for who he is and what he has done for you? Have you ever analyzed your prayer time? How much is just sheer praising the Lord? Notice that Mary used Scripture to recite back to the Lord in praise. That's a wonderful way to praise God, by reciting Scripture. You could use this wonderful Magnificat for your own personal praise time.
I think we also have to take a look at Joseph. I'm sure he was chosen of God for his part in this, as much as Mary was. You know, he could have easily refused to marry Mary. Most men would have done that, under the circumstances. By agreeing to marry her and support her through this birth, he took on a heavy responsibility.
Can you picture that trip to Bethlehem? It’s almost a hundred miles,
- Love is encouraging.
Would you consider yourself to be an encouraging person? I received an email of encouragement from a co-worker the other day. He affirmed me for the job I did leading a project.
When I opened and read the email, I was shocked. This particular individual is a person of very few words. He’s pretty reserved and quiet so when he sent a “way to go” to me, I was really surprised. I was also super grateful. The fact that he took time to send a note of encouragement was a very kind gesture.
When was the last time you spoke words of encouragement to someone? Or cheered someone on?
I was grabbing lunch at a nearby restaurant the other day when I heard the manager yell out a “way to go team.” I have never heard a restaurant manager giving a shout out to cheer on their team. It really left an impression on me to hear her encourage her employees.
Encouragement can breathe life into people. Genuine affirmation can be just what someone needs to keep going.
Proverbs 16:24 says, “Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.”
There have been times in my life where I have questioned where God wants me and if I am even making an impact in my ministry. When out of the blue, I will receive a text or a handwritten note from someone expressing gratitude for something I have done or a conversation that we had that made a difference for them. I know the Holy Spirit put it on their hearts to write to me at just the perfect time when I needed to be spurred on. And I am so grateful that they heeded the Spirit because he used them to remind me to stay the course.
1 Thessalonians 5:11 reminds us to, “encourage each other and build each other up.” Who can you speak life into today with a word of encouragement? Maybe it’s a coworker that you can give words of affirmation to, or a friend you can cheer on. Who can you encourage this week, face-to-face, send a text, email or a handwritten note? Who can you practice the love habit of encouragement with? It’s a double win. They will be blessed by your genuine and positive words and you will get a boost from blessing someone.
Here is a short but powerful verse from 1 Corinthians 16:14 that sums everything up. “Do everything in love.”
In every circumstance, with every person you encounter. Be Jesus...be love.
If you would like to read the entire week's devotional message, please click here to view/download the pdf.
Do you find it hard to forgive? When someone hurts you or sins against you, do you hold a grudge or are you quick to forgive an offense?
- Love is extending forgiveness.
The Bible has a lot to say about forgiveness and our heart posture as followers of Jesus.
“Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you” (Ephesians 4:32).
“Bear with each other and forgive one another ...if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you” (Colossians 3:13).
Do you notice the last few words of both of these verses? Forgive as the Lord, just as God in Christ has forgiven you. As a follower of Christ, Jesus is our example. Jesus is love and Jesus forgives.
As his followers we follow suit. If you are waiting to feel like forgiving, you may be waiting a very long time. Love is not a feeling, it is an action.
In the gospel of Matthew, “Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, ‘Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?’ Jesus answered, ‘I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times!’” (Matthew 18:21-22). It’s a tall order.
Theologian Henri Nouwen says "Forgiveness is the name of love practiced among people who love poorly. The hard truth is that all of us love poorly. We need to forgive and be forgiven every day, every hour--unceasingly.”
Colossians 3:12-14 reminds us: As God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Love is the mark of true maturity! We know we are maturing in our faith and in being more like Jesus when we love, when we forgive. It is really hard to forgive sometimes, trust me, I know. But forgiveness is the goal for every Christ follower. Is there someone Jesus is calling you to forgive? Ask him to release your heart from hurt, bitterness or resentment and help you to surrender to the process of forgiveness.
Would you consider yourself to be a generous person? Oftentimes we equate being generous with the giving of our finances, and while it is, being generous includes way more than how we steward our money.
- Love is generous.
Proverbs 3:27 says, “Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, when it is in your power to act.”
When I read these wise words of instruction, I think of generosity. There are numerous ways that we can do good and be generous. We can lend a hand when someone can use some help. We can meet a physical or financial need or do good and be generous with our time.
When it comes to doing good, I’d like to suggest some perhaps unconventional ways to be generous.
How about being generous with our listening? Instead of talking about ourselves or interrupting people to make our point and be heard, what if we were genuinely interested and generously listened to people?
Another form of generosity is with our love for one another. Especially when people act in ways we deem unlovable. The coworker that we find ourselves annoyed with or the distracted store clerk. What if rather than withholding love, the natural human tendency when we find it hard to love, it becomes all the more motivation to give them more love. When people behave in ways that repel love, it is often a signal that they need more of it.
What if we act wisely and do good by giving love?
I know that in my flesh my tendency can be to withhold love when people act in certain ways. But we don’t know what is going on in people’s lives. Years ago someone said something to me that has stuck with me. Treat everyone as if their heart were breaking - because it probably is. People are going through some really hard things. When they act in a way that repels love - strive to be love. To be generous with your love. And don’t try to muster this supernatural love in your own strength. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you.
How about being generous with your compassion? Trying honestly to see things from another person’s point of view.
Or being generous with the grace you extend to others.
Being generous with our words, our thoughts and our actions towards people. Seasoning our words with kindness and gentleness. Training our thoughts toward people to be loving and generous,
and believing the best about people.
Notice how these acts of generosity are not just in what we do but in who we are being.
How and with whom can you display the habit of love through generosity this week?
What side of your mind did you wake up on this morning? Sounds like a funny question doesn’t it? Well, today’s love habit has to do with what our mind dwells on because what our mind dwells on determines the direction of our life. So our love habit for today is dwelling on truth.
- Love dwells on truth.
Your life will always move in the direction of your strongest thoughts. What thoughts are you dwelling on?
In Philippians 4:8 Paul teaches us what to think about when he says: “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”
There is a computer term GIGO. It stands for garbage in garbage out. In computer science GIGO is the concept that flawed, or nonsense input data produces nonsense output. Rubbish in, rubbish out is an alternate wording. It’s the same with our minds. If we fill our minds with junk…too many tik-tok videos, excessive amounts of daily news, or trashy romance novels, it influences our minds and impacts our actions.
It has been said that the mind is like a garden. We need to be aware of what thoughts we are allowing to grow and take root which ultimately produce fruit in our lives. And love produces good fruit. So we literally root out, weed out the thoughts that don’t produce loving, godly actions and behaviors in our life.
As Romans 12:2 reminds us, you are to be transformed by the renewing of your mind. And the transformation you are aiming for is to be more like Jesus. To be more like love.
Are you dwelling on God’s Word? On truth? Are you meditating on thoughts that are lovely? Thoughts that produce goodness, generosity, kindness, and compassion? Do your thoughts promote love and acting in ways that are loving, pleasing, acceptable, grateful?
When we practice dwelling on the truth of God’s Word, good things, God things will flow from us.
So let’s get in the habit of love.
The dictionary describes a habit as a recurrent pattern of behavior or established disposition of the mind that is acquired through frequent repetition.
When practiced over time, attitudes, behaviors, actions, and thoughts become habits. They start to come naturally. And love is a habit worth forming. So let’s dive into the first love habit.
- The habit of living loved.
Sounds kind of strange doesn’t it? What does it mean to live loved?
A dear friend of mine was sharing how she didn’t really feel loved growing up. She was the oldest of three children, her younger siblings were boys. She grew up feeling like she wasn’t as desirable or loved as they were. She also grew up thinking she wasn’t smart enough, pretty enough, or likeable enough. It made me sad because I could see how living with the feeling of not being loved had permeated her life.
Maybe you grew up with the same feeling. Or maybe you have a habit of blocking others from loving you. You intentionally or unintentionally put up a wall that shuts people out and keeps people at an arm’s distance. Living loved, believing that you are lovable and worthy of love can be hard sometimes. People will do a poor job at loving us, as we will do with others. When we open ourselves up to people caring about us, to people loving us, it can be scary. We fear being rejected. But Jesus wants you to live loved, because you are. People will love imperfectly but Jesus is perfect love. Do you live as one deeply loved?
I love the Apostle Paul’s prayer in his letter to the Ephesians. “I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God” (Ephesians 3:17b-19 emphasis added). Jesus wants you to be utterly convinced that you are loved and he wants you to live loved. When we live as one deeply loved by Jesus, it changes everything.
For those of us who are personally acquainted with the Savior who was born that first Christmas day, Christmas holds particular significance. However, we've romanticized the story of Christmas to the place that the manger scene and the people involved seem like actors in a play. We rarely stop to think that they were real people, in anything but a romantic setting.
That’s why I'd like to bring a little reality to the Christmas story. I want to talk about the most blessed woman who ever lived. And I want to focus on the heart of Mary. What was it about this lady that qualified her for this incredible privilege of bearing the Savior of the world? What was in her heart?
Let me begin by pointing out that nowhere in Scripture are we given any indication that Mary is to be worshipped. If she were here, I think Mary would be the first to tell us that she was just a woman, a very simple young lady, chosen by God for a special purpose. But like all of the rest of mankind, she was born of Adam's race—born according to man—and she inherited the same sin nature that all of us have.
So, when I speak of Mary's heart, I'm not elevating her to some divine place of sinless perfection. We’d have a hard time relating to her if that were true. But in fact it is because Mary was just like us—a regular lady—that we can look at her heart and can identify with her and learn from her. So, try to erase all those images of Mary with a halo over her head, and see instead a lady with a wash bucket and children, a small, poor home, with few luxuries or conveniences, and a very special heart.
Though Mary came from the line of David, she was a humble lady from a very small, insignificant town, Nazareth. We don't know anything about her parents, except that they must have been godly people because Mary had a very good knowledge of Old Testament Scripture.
We begin to get an idea of the heart of Mary when we think about Gabriel's announcement to her that she had been chosen to bear the Messiah. Let's look at that passage in Luke 1:28-38: Gabriel said to Mary: "Do not be afraid, Mary; for you have found favor with God. And behold, you will conceive in your womb, and bear a son, and you shall name Him Jesus. He will be great, and will be called the Son of the Most High; and the Lord God will give Him the throne of His father David; and He will reign over the house of Jacob forever, and His kingdom will have no end."
And Mary said to the angel, "How can this be, since I am a virgin?” And the angel answered and said to her, "The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you; and for that reason the holy offspring shall be called the Son of God. And behold, even your relative Elizabeth has also conceived a son in her old age; and she who was called barren is now in her sixth month. For nothing will be impossible with God."
And Mary said, "Behold the bondslave of the Lord; be it done to me according to your word.” And the angel departed from her. Certainly Scripture makes it clear time and again that Mary was then a virgin and remained a virgin until after the birth of Jesus. You know, not many people who will be celebrating Christmas this year really believe that Jesus was born of a virgin.
Why is it so terribly important that we believe and accept that Mary was indeed a virgin until after Jesus' birth? Because we know from Scripture that sin entered the world through the seed of man. Had Jesus been conceived through an earthly man's seed, he could not have escaped the sin nature that is born into all of us. And if Jesus were not sinless, he could never become the sacrifice demanded by God's righteousness.
The virgin birth is not an optional theology. Your whole destiny—and mine—depends upon whether or not it is true. We are acceptable to God when we accept the redemption and forgiveness of our sins made possible because the perfect sacrificial Lamb, Jesus Christ, paid the debt for our sins.
Did you ever try to communicate with someone who thought they knew it all?
The "Know-It-All"
They think they know more about your job than you do, and everything else for that matter. And furthermore, they have never been wrong! Often their behavior is arrogant and condescending, and they don't usually listen well at all. They are short on "thank you" and "please" and virtually devoid of "I'm sorry."
With most "Know-It-All's" the best way to deal with them is not to get defensive, not to try to win an argument, lose the battles willingly and without anger, and go for the war. Solve the problem as quickly as you can, if possible, and then try to move on.
One technique I've discovered to be very helpful in dealing with very difficult types is to feel sorry for them; to put myself in their shoes and imagine how difficult life must be for a person who thinks they know it all. As soon as I get in that frame of mind, they can't get under my skin quite as much because I don't take it personally.
The Abusive Person
Unfortunately, we've all had the very unpleasant experience of dealing with someone who becomes abusive or offensive, either through excessive profanity, or using words to ridicule or degrade us or someone else. A woman shared with me that a customer said to her: "Let me talk to someone who has a brain larger than a two year old.” That is offensive and unacceptable.
Don't expose yourself to that garbage talk. The best way to respond is to give a warning, and if their behavior does not change, end the conversation. Here is an example of a warning: "Excuse me, but I'm here to help you and I certainly want to help you. However, we will need to speak in normal business language. If this is not a good time for you, we can talk later." Most people will change their behavior quickly, and some will even apologize to you.
In closing, here are some wonderful verses from Proverbs which give us great advice on dealing with difficult people: Proverbs 15:1: "A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”
Proverbs 12:16: "Fools show their annoyance at once, but the prudent overlook an insult."
Proverbs 18:13: "To answer before listening—that is folly and shame." Remember what I've often said: No one is in your life by accident, even those difficult people. God gives us these opportunities to demonstrate his love and his power to those people and others who are watching us. So, don't blow your opportunities. Learn to deal with difficult types of people.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
Whether on our jobs, in our homes or even in our churches, often we find it’s necessary to deal with difficult types of people.
The Whiner
There seem to be some people who enjoying whining, have you noticed? They will repeat their problem over and over, even after it has been resolved. And as soon as the current complaint is taken care of, they seem to have another one waiting in the wings. Often they complain about problems for which there are no solutions.
When dealing with these types, you need to assume a more "take charge," business-like approach. While speaking in a kind way, don't lay the empathy or sympathy on too heavily, but keep repeating the facts. Be prepared to be a "broken record," if necessary, like this:
"I understand, but as I said, I will be glad to send you a copy of the contract..."
"Yes, I realize it has been frustrating, but as I said, we'll be glad to change our records..." "I know this hasn't been easy for you, but as I said, I will try to make certain it doesn't happen again." You may even have to interrupt a whiner if they don't come up for air! Also, it can be effective to "put the ball back in their court," so to speak:
"Well, I'm not certain what you would want me to do. How can I help you with this?"
"I would love to be able to help you; what would you like me to do?"
This at least gets you into "solution stage" where you force them to either verbalize a solution or admit that there is none!
The Mistaken Person
When dealing with someone who thinks they are absolutely, positively right, but instead they are absolutely, positively wrong, you must use a great deal of diplomacy. You'll need to find a face saver that will let them off the hook. Here are some examples of face savers:
"If our records our correct..."
"If my information is accurate..."
"I'm not sure, but it looks like..." "I think I've got good news for you, because hopefully our problem is resolved. If I'm not mistaken..." "Well, I certainly could be wrong about this; it wouldn't be the first time, but I think..."
"I can understand how it would appear to be that way. . ."
Keep in mind that if there is nothing to be gained by proving you are right and the other person is wrong, let it go. Lose the battle and win the war. Avoid fruitless finger-pointing exercises as much as possible. They waste time and energy and cause problems as well.
Did you know that some people believe in "winning through intimidation"?
You've run into this person before, I'm sure. He or she will say things like:
"What's the name of your manager?"
"Do you know who I am?"
"You'll hear from my lawyer."
"This is the last time we'll do business with you."
"My boss will hear about this."
"I’m going to send a memo to the President."
"I've been here 20 years and I know what I'm talking about."
"I have connections!"
"I'm going to run away from home."
"I'll never speak to you again!"
Your first response to the intimidator is to let him or her know that you are not intimidated. The best way to do that is to immediately acknowledge that he or she has the option to do whatever it is they are threatening to do, and then move immediately into solution stage, as though the threat is behind you. More often than not, an intimidator is bluffing and will back off quickly with this kind of response:
"Of course you can speak with my manager. Her name is Alice Smith, and as soon as she is available, I will connect you. Meanwhile, let me see if I can resolve this issue for you..."
"If you feel that your best course is to take legal action, I'll be glad to put you in touch with our legal department. However, we both recognize that is not an ideal solution, and I'd like to work with you for a satisfactory resolution. Here's what we can do..."
In a family situation, this may take a slightly different approach. For example, if a child is threatening to run away from home, it would have the same effect to say:
"We would be very sad and lonely here without you."
Another way to show the intimidator you are not intimidated is to state your name clearly, even if you've already given it. That lets the intimidator know that you are confident your response has been correct and are willing to be accountable for anything you've said or done.
Most intimidators will back off quickly when they find someone who doesn't wilt under the intimidation, who is confident, and who at the same time, genuinely tries to solve the problem.
What do you do when you're confronted with an angry, irate person? There are five stages to remember in dealing with a person who is angry and irate, and it is important to follow these stages in sequence:
Listen and allow that person to ventilate.
Many times an angry person simply needs to "get it off his/her chest," and then that person calms down. So, when you encounter someone who is in an angry state, tell yourself, "Just listen."
Defuse the anger
When it is your turn to talk, be sure you first go through the "defuse stage.” Here are some effective ways to defuse a situation:
Use empathy and/or sympathy.
Some sample empathetic phrases are: --"I can understand your frustration..." --"I certainly can see why that would upset you..." --"I know how annoying that can be..." --"I know what you mean; that has happened to me, and it can be very upsetting. You can sympathize with an angry person without apologizing. For example: --"I'm sorry you've had a problem..." --"I'm sorry this has inconvenienced you..." --"I'm sorry to hear about that..."
Agree where possible. When you can agree with someone, it is a very strong defuser, because it's no longer "me against you," but you put yourself on their team, trying to solve their problem. Apologize if appropriate. Assure the angry person of a response. But of course, don't promise what you cannot deliver.
Clarify the situation
Typically, very angry people will exaggerate their problem. It may be helpful to paraphrase the situation back to the angry person, minus the anger.
Offer suggestions and/or solutions
After defusing and clarifying, you should be able to go into solution stage. That will take many different forms based on the situation.
However, I would emphasize once again that you do not go to solution stage until you've defused.
End on a positive note
After you have dealt with an angry person, remember to have the "last word," and make certain that last word is positive.
I'm not very good at shooting from the hip, are you? When situations catch me unprepared, I can make some poor decisions, choose words badly, and often make things worse. That's why I need to have a plan for dealing with difficult types of people.
Remember when Jesus' home-town crowd was so angry at him for claiming to be who he was that they wanted to kill him? Jesus knew it was time to leave, so in Luke 4:30 we read "he walked right through the crowd and went on his way.” In other words, there was no reasoning with this angry mob and Jesus knew when to walk away. Sometimes we need to walk away instead of trying to have the last word or convince someone that they're wrong.
There were other situations where Jesus dealt with difficult people very directly. When the Pharisees and religious leaders got on their "high horses" and started accusing Jesus of all kinds of things, he was often extremely direct in telling them to "cool it," if you please. But I notice that Jesus was never out of control when he was confronting these people. He knew exactly what he wanted to say, said it with emphasis, and did it to teach and help others.
If we are ever in a situation where direct confrontation is necessary with a difficult type, we should be ever-so-careful to make certain that we do it under the Holy Spirit's control. It can be forceful and direct, but it should never be cruel or vindictive or personal.
As believers in the workplace, dealing with difficult types gives us an opportunity to demonstrate the love of Jesus. We have the power of the Holy Spirit to give us wisdom and guidance and to control our words. Don't you think we should be better at dealing with difficult people because we know Jesus?
Dealing with people who are not in control takes exceptional people skills. These may be people who are difficult for everyone to deal with all the time, or they may be people who are having a bad day. But when they unleash their emotions on you, you need to be prepared.
What is the best gift you ever received?
I love gifts, especially the ones I know were specifically curated just for me! Like, the person giving me the gift saw it and it had my name on it. Have you ever received a gift that made you feel known, special, loved?
One of my favorite gifts is from my friend Audra. She is the best gift giver. In fact her gift giving game is so strong it puts mine to shame! Last Christmas I unwrapped a package that came in the mail, (the fact that I had something to open other than junk mail was in itself exciting). It was a beautiful navy blue journal with a gold coil and gold foiled lettering. The writing on the front cover was a prayer that read: “Lord, I give you this day. I pray for productivity and patience, creativity and kindness. Thank You for the gifts You have blessed me with. I ask that you would give me wisdom to use them to their fullest. I pray that these efforts would be a testament to Your goodness and that all the glory would be Yours.”
I wanted you to hear what was engraved on the cover of the journal because those words, that gift, made me feel seen and known. If you know me, as my dear friend of 20 years does, you would know that the words on the cover of that journal would speak to my heart. That gift made me feel loved.
As we continue in this month’s theme of love, let’s take a look at what 1 Corinthians 13 instructs us on this powerful gift. The gift of love that we have received by faith in Jesus Christ and that we get to give generously to others.
These verses may be familiar to you and we usually hear them spoken at weddings. Yet they aren’t just reserved to be lived out between husband and wife, they are meant to speak to the heart condition and be the overflow of every follower of Jesus.
Just prior to chapter 13 of first Corinthians, the Apostle Paul has just spent the previous chapter talking about the different gifts that The Holy Spirit gives to every believer. Paul says that while receiving and utilizing these spiritual gifts for the benefit of others is to be desired, the best way to live and benefit others is with love. Even when compared to all of the other spiritual gifts, love is the most important thing. Or as Paul says—the most excellent way. If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. (1Corinthians 13:1-8) Those words are so rich with truth. We see that Paul is making some pretty clear call outs on how love does and doesn’t act. Paul is calling us up to who we are in Christ and reminding us to love like Jesus.
You and I could speak with tongues of angels but if we are not being love to those around us we are like a resounding gong or clanging symbol. I have to say, I have sounded like a noisy gong and clanging symbol all too many times when my words and actions have lacked love. Can you relate?
It’s not just our actions that show love. You can do all of the right things but if your attitude, if our disposition and words are not soaked in and dispensing love it’s worthless. Love is not just about doing the right thing, it’s about being the most excellent thing. Now who does not want to be loved like that!
And the love Paul references here is not a romantic, mushy or sexual love, it’s not even just a brotherly love.
I’ve made the point that Christ-followers should never be a part of this negative movement. Even though our faith is often maligned or disrespected, we should respond to those who insist on being offended in a compassionate and gentle way.
Jesus told his disciples: “You will be hated by everyone because of me, but the one who stands firm to the end will be saved” (Matthew 10:22). That was his challenge to us when we are offended—to stand firm to the end. We need to be prepared to process offensive, harmful, and hurtful language without responding in kind.
Feeling offended is a choice. You choose whether or not you will allow someone or something to offend you because it is a feeling and you have the power to entertain it or dismiss it. Remember our key verse from Proverbs 19:11—it is to our glory to overlook an offense. And it also sets us free from self-pity, anger, and all kinds of unnecessary pain when we overlook an offense.
So, as a Christ-follower, what can you do when you are offended to deal with those bad feelings, because there’s no question that those feelings do emerge? Whining or complaining is certainly unhelpful and makes things worse. Talking about how you’ve been offended with like-minded people won’t solve anything, right? The interesting thing is, when you or I are offended, we like to wallow in those hurtful feelings; we like to feel sorry for ourselves, even though it’s a miserable place to be.
Romans 12:18 says, “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” Seems to me that would mean holding our tongues at those points where we may feel offended, and when we feel it necessary to respond, do so in gentle and loving ways. You can be the voice of peace and healing in your world, even in the midst of an offended culture.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
I’ve been encouraging you not to be a part of the “I am offended” culture, but also not to be intimidated by it. It’s easy to allow this invasive culture to cause us to keep our mouths shut when we should speak out, causing us to be fearful that we won’t be accepted by others. Don’t you know that the enemy of our soul delights in using this "offendedness" syndrome to cause us to retreat into our holy huddles and keep our mouths shut?
Consider a time when Jesus offended some people. In confronting the Pharisees and teachers of the law about their hypocrisy in Matthew 15:12, the disciples came to Jesus and said: “Do you know that the Pharisees were offended when they heard this?” The disciples were shocked that Jesus would openly speak against their religious rulers, knowing they were powerful and could do Jesus harm. I can imagine them taking Jesus aside and advising him that his criticism of the Pharisees was really dangerous. They figured he somehow didn’t get it—didn’t realize that he was offending the Pharisees, for surely he wouldn’t do that intentionally.
Listen to how Jesus responded: “Every plant that my heavenly Father has not planted will be pulled up by the roots. Leave them; they are blind guides. If the blind lead the blind, both will fall into a pit” (Matthew 15:13). Here’s what Jesus is saying: If the Pharisees and their teachings are not from God, not according to the truth, then they won’t last and their teachings won’t last. Just let them alone. Don’t waste time trying to change them or please them. They are blind leading blind and eventually they will be exposed and they will fail.
Truth always trumps error, so there will be times when speaking the truth—yes, even speaking the truth in love—will be offensive to someone. Those are the times we must be ready to give a defense for the hope that is in us, as Peter puts it, and to do that reverently and gently. So, when we need to speak truth that may be offensive to others, we do it in a humble spirit with as gentle words as possible, but we don’t shrink from doing it, even if we are criticized for offending others.
So, while we are never to be part of the “I am offended” culture, we are likewise never to be hesitant to speak truth and always in a loving spirit.
I’m addressing the “I am offended” culture which is rampant today. Let me say that if you and I want to live in a free society, if we want the advantages that the Bill of Rights grants to us—free speech, freedom of religion, free press, etc.—then we have to accept the fact that we will not agree with nor approve of many things that are expressed.
Our country—our civilization—is at its best when as individuals or groups, we try to avoid unnecessary "offendedness" and recognize that being offended at times is the price we pay for the right to our freedoms—our right to express our beliefs and spread the Gospel. Think of people who live in countries without freedom of speech. They probably don’t have to deal with this “I am offended” culture we face, but then, they put their lives in danger if and when they publicly share their faith. So, we need to carefully guard our freedoms because they allow us to tell the good news of Jesus and not let this offended culture intimidate us or make us fearful.
As believers we don’t want to be defined by what we are not, but rather by what and who we are. We are loved by God, we are joint-heirs with Jesus, we are joyful, we are hopeful, we are positive and upbeat because of who we are in Christ. That should be our story to the world around us, even if that world is trying to offend us or cancel us. Of course we take a stand against evil and wrong—such as abortion—and do all we can to eliminate it. But we take those positions and express our opinions because we have the freedom to do so, which means others have the freedom to oppose us. But as Paul wrote to the Romans, “If God is for us, who can be against us?” (Romans 8:31).
Don’t you think it’s important for us not to be easily offended—not to take everything personally? I’m not talking about laying down and letting people walk on you, but simply deciding not to react to every offensive thing you see or hear. Again, from Proverbs 19:11, it is to our glory to overlook an offense.
So, my encouragement to you is to avoid being a part of the “I am offended” culture and instead determine to be agents of God’s love and peace. In a world becoming more and more divided and hateful, looking for reasons to be offended and waiting for the opportunity to try to bring someone else down, we have the glorious privilege of demonstrating how Jesus would respond, showing his compassion and love even to those who offend us.
Are you part of the “I am offended” culture? Being offended is a choice you make; it is often self-inflicted suffering. But we are more and more surrounded by highly-offendable people, who seem eager to take offense at most anything. And let’s face it—social media has given them the platform to air their offendedness wide and far.
So, how should a Christ-follower respond to the offended culture that is all around us—in our institutions and schools, social media abounds with it, and it even creeps into the church. First, we should never be a part of it, either as the one easily offended or the one trying to offend. Jesus said, “If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also. And if anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your coat as well. If anyone forces you to go one mile, go with them two miles.” (Matthew 5:39 – 41).
Jesus is not advocating that we subject ourselves to abusive behavior, but he is saying that if you will be willing to break the cycle, to be the one who refuses to return an offense for an offense, you can stop this hurtful cycle at least in your spheres of influence. If you actively take offense and get involved in the back and forth, you become part of the problem. Christians should be part of the solution.
This “I am offended” culture is demanding perfection of everyone—except themselves, of course. And if they discover anything in a person’s present or past which they can define as offensive, then the next thing is to try to cancel that person, leading to the cancel culture. The Psalmist said, “If you, Lord, kept a record of sins, Lord, who could stand?” (Psalm 130:3). None of us would have any recourse to the Lord if he kept a record and constantly reminded and condemned us for our past. And if he can forgive us so freely and remember our sins no more, then as his followers, we should avoid this culture of laying blame and being offended.
It is sad to find so many social media conflicts between Christians. Jesus said if you have something against someone, you go to them in person, you don’t publicize it and re-send it and send copies to everyone you know. If you find something offensive, don’t share it with others.
I’m sure you’ve noticed that people these days are very easily offended. In fact, you hear people talk about the “I am offended” culture or the “easily offended” culture. Sadly, many think they have the right to be offended about almost anything, and if they are offended, everyone else must affirm their right to be offended and make drastic changes to keep from offending them.
All that is necessary for a claim to be taken seriously is for the claim to be offered. After all, being offended is an emotional state or response, so how can you deny that the person who claims to be offended has not been genuinely offended? And as Christians we can fall into this same pattern of claiming to be offended when we face opposition to or criticism of our beliefs.
Now obviously, there are legitimate times when people offend others, but the term “offended” has been taken to new levels these days, instead of maybe “bothered” or “disagreed.” So, living in this “I am offended culture,” how should we as Christ-followers respond?
First, let’s establish that having hurt feelings or allowing someone to offend you is a choice, and it is often self-imposed mental cruelty. Why allow others to be in charge of your feelings? Proverbs 19:11 says, “A person’s wisdom yields patience; it is to one’s glory to overlook an offense.” There is no glory in being offended, no status to be gained. In fact, someone who is easily offended is most likely very insecure in who they are.
So, first, those of us who are believers should be firmly established in who we are in Christ, and therefore not be threatened by this “I am offended” movement. We live in a diverse culture and we believe in freedom of speech, therefore, being offended is simply part of life at times. For example, we’ve seen a continued effort to remove all symbols of Christianity from the public square because they offend some people. However, those who claim to be offended are not actually harmed in any factual way, but rather are allowing themselves to be put in an emotional state just because they are confronted with someone else’s beliefs.
So, the first thing I want to say about this “I am offended culture” is that as Christ-followers, it should not include us. Jesus told us that in this world we will have persecution—we would be offended. He certainly was but he knew who he was and what he came to do. We, too, can follow in his steps to have the wisdom to overlook many offenses and simply not react to them.
In this two-part message about broken relationships, we took an in-depth look at what Jesus told us to do when we find ourselves dealing with a wounded relationship. Let me again quote from Matthew 5:23 - 24:
Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.
Jesus gives us very explicit directions—not suggestions, but directions—on our responsibility to try to be reconciled to someone who has something against us. I pointed out that this is a high priority and we should not put it off. Jesus said it’s so important that you should leave your religious duties undone, if necessary, and go find that person with whom you need to be reconciled. And he teaches us that we are to initiate this action, if at all possible, even if we are not the guilty party.
Being reconciled to others is so important. It’s important to us and the other person involved. But it’s also important to our testimony for Jesus Christ. How harmful it is when people who both claim to be disciples of Jesus Christ refuse to be reconciled. Just recently I learned of two well-known people in Christian ministry who refuse to be reconciled, and indeed seem to be carrying a vendetta against each other. That just boggles my mind. How could any of us be so proud or so stubborn that we are unwilling to at least try to mend these broken relationships? It is in direct disobedience to the teaching of Jesus, as we’ve just read.
It may be that there is someone in your life who refuses your desire to reconcile, even though you’ve really tried. Please make sure that you are not carrying around some load of false guilt because the relationship is still broken or wounded. Keep praying, doing whatever you can to mend it, but God doesn’t want you to live under a cloud of guilt if you have truly tried to reconcile. Remember that sometimes the best healer is time, so give it even more time and just keep praying. Never give up asking God to restore that relationship.
Now what approach should you use with someone with whom you are seeking reconciliation? While we are to speak the truth, it is always to be done in love. So, your approach is important. Make sure you’re “prayed up” before you go, ask God to give you pure motives and to be very sensitive to the other person’s feelings and understand their perspective, as much as you can.
If possible, you want to have this conversation in person. That is highly preferable, but if that is not possible, use Facetime or Zoom or however you can best communicate. How you begin the conversation is critical, so I would not recommend that you begin by repeating all the mistakes the other person has made, nor defending yourself and explaining why you are not at fault. Nor is this the time to recite how you have been hurt or harmed, or to lecture the other person.
Rather, it is the time to lovingly accept blame for whatever you have done that has contributed to the bad feelings and talk about what you are willing to do to mend the relationship. Keep in mind that reconciliation is not for the purpose of airing your grievances; it is rather to cease hostility. Anything that might cause hostility to increase or continue should not be a part of your efforts to reconcile.
I find it’s always helpful to carefully plan my words for these types of conversations, even writing it out so that I think ahead of time of the best way to begin. Your choice of words can make a big difference in the response you receive so don’t choose finger-pointing or condescending words. Rather choose words that do not seek to place blame, but rather seek to find common ground.
By writing it ahead of time, even though you’re not planning to read it, you will be much better prepared to get started on the right foot, as we say,
We need an attitude of gratitude. We can capture that kind of attitude by recovering the wonder of God.
I talked about the wonder of your salvation and the wonder of God’s creation. Don’t lose the wonder!
Have you lost the wonder of your uniqueness? So often we forget who we are in Christ and the wonder of how God has created us. David wrote:
For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made. (Psalm 139:13-14)
You are made full of wonder; have you ever really appreciated the wonder of who you are? Right now, list the things about you that are unique. You may be a wonderful listener; you could be a great encourager; maybe you are a gifted writer or speaker; or you could have the gift of joy that you bring to others. I love helpers—people who are just there to help in any need. That's wonderful! If that’s you, say so. Thank God for who you are.
Have you lost the wonder of Jesus? In Mark 9:15 we read: "As soon as all the people saw Jesus, they were overwhelmed with wonder and ran to greet him.” When was the last time you were "overwhelmed with wonder" because of Jesus?
Recapture the wonder of Jesus. Go back into that first love, that awestruck wonder that Jesus came to earth for you, died for you, rose again for you, and ever lives to make intercession for you. If that's not wonderful, I don't know what is!
This Thanksgiving season is a great time to recover the wonder:
-of your salvation
-of God's creation
-of the unique way God has created you
-of Jesus.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
Thanksgiving is a good time to remind ourselves that we really need to be thankful people—to have an attitude of gratitude. It’s not always easy to do, is it? Don’t you know that the enemy of your soul would love to keep you from being a thankful person? If we stay mired in worry and complaining and negative attitudes, then we’re not going to be effective for our Lord.
But a person who develops a real, genuine attitude of gratitude is the kind of person you love to be with, the kind who exudes the joy of the Lord. So, I just want to remind you of some ways you and I can develop a life-long attitude of gratitude. We must be intentional about it; it won’t just happen. And it’s all in our minds—how we think, what we think about.
I think we need to go back to the wonder of all that God has done for us. Have you lost the wonder? Check up on yourself as I mention some of the wonders we need to recover.
Have you lost the wonder of your salvation? When was the last time you shared your story of the time when you became a child of God? When was the last time you prayed: "Lord, thank you so much that I'm born from above and I know that I'll spend eternity with you?” Thank God for your salvation every day.
Have you lost the wonder of God's creation? Do you just take all the beauty and extravagance of the world for granted? When was the last time you enjoyed a beautiful flower or sunset?
David wrote: When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars which you have set in place, what is mankind that you are mindful of them, human beings that you care for them? (Psalm 8:3-4)
The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands. (Psalm 19:1) Have you lost the wonder of his creation? Take some time to sit and look around you at the beauty of the world. It will give you an attitude of gratitude.
Would you like to help someone be more than they ever thought they could be? I’m pointing out how Jesus dealt with people so that we can learn some important people skills from the Master. And Jesus was an expert at inspiring people to greatness.
Think about his famous disciple, Peter. When he first met Jesus he was called Simon. But we read in John 1 that “Jesus looked at him and said, ‘You are Simon son of John. You will be called Cephas’ (which, when translated, is Peter” (John 1:42).
Cephas and Peter both mean rock. Jesus called him rock. I wonder how Peter felt when Jesus changed his name. I’m quite certain he had some understanding of the meaning of this name change. Jesus was telling him, in effect, “Peter, I want you on my team. You’re going to be my rock. I believe in you, Peter, and you can be greater than you’ve ever imagined.”
This humble, uneducated fisherman did indeed become great in the kingdom of God. It didn’t happen overnight, you will recall. Peter stumbled along the way many times. But Jesus had given him a new name and called him what he would become. Jesus demonstrated faith in Peter and in spite of his failures, Jesus never gave up on him until he realized his destiny.
If you want to help someone be all that they can be, start calling them what they can become. You probably won’t be able to change their name, but you can say things like, “I believe you could learn to make a very effective presentation. You are good in front of a group.” Or, “You know, you’re good at numbers and statistics. I think you could be great in our research department.” Or to your child, “Honey, you do so well in English. I can see you as a great writer.” Or to your mate, “You have such good insight into people; I bet you’d be a great counselor.”
Something that simple can give a person new hope, a new image of themselves, and it could make a major difference in what they are able to achieve and do. So, call some people names today like Jesus did for Peter. Call them what they can become and it will inspire them to go for it.
Has someone in your life disappointed you greatly? Life is full of those kinds of disappointments. Guess what—you’ve disappointed some people, too, no doubt. Well, what can we learn from Jesus in dealing with people who fail us?
Did you ever think about how his closest friends and associates failed Jesus? Judas betrayed him; Peter denied him; they all fled at the first sign of trouble. These twelve men were disappointing failures as disciples, were they not? They were slow to learn, they had their priorities all confused, they had ulterior motives for following Jesus. Over and over Jesus indicated his frustration with their lack of faith and trust in him.
Yet he never threw them off the team. He allowed them to fail; he permitted them to make mistakes; he suffered through their ignorance and arrogance, until finally they became the men he intended them to be.
This is a people skill we all need to learn from Jesus and learn well. People need time to learn and grow. Failure is one of the best teaching methods ever invented. Time is also a good teacher. So, in dealing with people, remember that disappointments come with the territory.
Been disappointed in your child lately? Remember what you were like at his or her age. That always does it for me, because I can clearly remember the dumb things I did in early years, and my daughter is way ahead of where I was. Give your child time to grow. Teach and coach and role model for your children, but remember, they’re going to disappoint you as they grow and learn.
Got an employee who disappoints you sometimes? Maybe he or she hasn’t yet polished their verbal skills and they say the wrong words at times. Be patient with them. You probably have had your share of shoe polish on your face from inserting your foot in your mouth. If that person is teachable, he or she could become one of your most valued employees.
Another great people skill principle from our Master: Allow people to fail and disappoint and make mistakes, because in the process they learn and grow.
Getting along with people is one of the most important skills we all need to develop—and one of the most difficult. You know, regardless of what kind of work you do every day, you undoubtedly have to get along with some people in order to do it, right? You have to motivate them or placate them or correct them or teach them or guide them or help them—or all of the above. People! They’re always there!
Well, it’s no surprise that we can learn how to deal with all kinds of people in all kinds of situations by studying the Master, Jesus Christ. His people skills were the best ever. So, I want to point out some lessons we can learn from Jesus in how to get along with people.
Consider what Jesus taught us to do when a relationship has been broken or wounded. In Matthew 5: 23-24 we read:
If you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.
Here’s what we learn from Jesus: If there’s anything wrong with a relationship, try to fix it quickly. Don’t let it fester. In fact, Jesus said to interrupt your worship if you have to. If you’re in church and you’re convicted about a hurting relationship, leave church even before the sermon’s over and go try to fix that broken relationship. Don’t let anything get in your way and don’t waste any time.
Also, Jesus teaches that we should make the first move even if we’re not the one at fault. He said if your brother has something against you, you go to your brother. Now, we’d probably say, “If he’s got something against me, that’s his problem, not mine.” But the Master said you should make that first effort to be reconciled and do so quickly.
Even though it seems backward to us, remember that doing it Jesus’ way works.
Broken relationships come in all sizes and descriptions. For example, a woman told me about a broken relationship with her brother. Because she doesn’t speak to him any longer, she wasn’t going to take part in her family’s Christmas celebration, as usual, because her brother would be there. That not only affected her enjoyment of an important family get together, but her young sons would also miss out on that family occasion.
A friend of mine is in the midst of a broken marriage relationship, a marriage of over thirty years. It’s not her fault that the relationship is broken, and she is doing all she can to repair it. But her pain has been palpable as she deals with the brokenness of this long-term most intimate of all relationships, her marriage.
Another friend was “downsized” from an organization and she felt the decision was extremely unfair. It came from people she had trusted as friends. But now that work relationship is severed and it has caused on-going hard feelings between her and the management she once respected. Though some time has passed since this relationship was severed, the memories are still painful.
I think of two friends, who are still friends, but something happened a few years ago, where one felt she had been betrayed by the other. Though it was basically one of those terrible misunderstandings of life, the friendship has never really been the same since then.
Think of the broken relationships in your own world, whether they are yours personally or those you are aware of. Consider the ripple effect that broken and hurting relationships have, not only on the people directly involved, but inevitably on many others as well.
Are we doomed to have to live with these broken relationships? What is our duty and responsibility in trying to mend a broken relationship?
Jesus’ “Fix” for Broken Relationships
Consider what Jesus taught us to do when a relationship has been broken or wounded.
Matthew 5:23 - 24:
Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.
Notice that Jesus is talking to religious people and that would seem to indicate that even committed people who are trying to do the right thing will have relationship struggles. I think Jesus is also telling us that mending broken relationships takes priority over religious activities and duties. He is teaching us that mending broken relationships has a very high priority.
Since Jesus says that if you “remember that your brother has something against you,” it must mean that it is possible to forget that you have a broken relationship. You may ask, how could you forget a broken relationship? Well, since they are so painful, we can find ways to put them out of our minds instead of dealing with them. Here are some of the methods people may use to “forget” about those unpleasant, hurting relationships:
You stay very busy, even if you have to create unnecessary activity. I’ve noticed that when I want to put off an unpleasant task, I use busyness as an excuse, and can I ever generate busyness when I want to. My guess is you’ve done the same thing. You convince yourself that there’s nothing that can be done about it. You try to rationalize away the need to be reconciled by convincing yourself it would be an exercise in futility. You decide that since you didn’t cause the problem, you shouldn’t be the one to initiate the reconciliation. This is one of our favorite cop-outs when it comes to reconciliation. Shouldn’t the person who caused the problem initiate any reconciliation? Seems right to us, so we forget about that broken relationship. You find other relationships to fill the gap in your life. Often people look for substitute activities or people to take up the slack of a broken relationship. When it is a romantic relationship,
What we need more than anything in any relationship is love.
The Bible tells us that God IS love. John 3:16 says it perfectly. “For this is how God loved the world: He gave His one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish but have eternal life.”
Sadly, there are times when it seems that having good relationships is more difficult than we would dare to admit. Why is that? Remember how TV shows used to say, “we interrupt our program to bring you this important message…” Well, here’s my important message: Read your Bible. Seriously, what I have been discovering ever since I made the Bible a daily discipline is how wrong I was about so many things and clueless about how to get it right.
Why are relationships, yes, even among the Body of Christ at times so challenging??!! Could it be that we fail to see how the Bible gives us clear and practical instructions for life—for relationships?
Consider this passage from Colossians 3:12-15:
Since God chose you to be the holy people he LOVES, you must clothe yourselves with tender hearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. Above all, clothe yourselves with LOVE, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful.
These are not suggestions from the Apostle Paul!! These are divine orders that if obeyed will make us the kind of people the Lord wants us to be. Are we clothed in love, forgiving one another, being at peace with each other because Christ rules in our hearts?
Bacharach and David, a team of secular writers wrote a song some of you will remember called, “What the World Needs Now is Love.” It feels like these writers unwittingly uttered a prophetic word. What relationships need now is love, sweet love, God’s kind of love. It’s the only thing that there’s just too little of.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
Good relationships are built by trust. When you don’t trust someone it’s nearly impossible to maintain any kind of relationship with them. You may work with someone or even live with someone that you don’t really trust. You may have some interaction, yes, but you would never say you have a good relationship. And why? Because you do not trust them.
But instead of talking today about the people in our live who we don’t trust, let’s ask ourselves this question: Am I trustworthy? Am I the one that others might say this about, “Don’t ask her to do it. Believe me, it will not get done because they can’t be trusted.” And to be fair there are some people that truly cannot be trusted. But again, my question for you today is, can YOU be trusted?
The Lord is completely trustworthy. Our goal is to be like Him. He has never lied and never will. Jesus said, “I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life” (John 14:6). He not only speaks truth, He IS truth. Jesus said this about the devil in the second half of John 8:44b: “He was a murderer from the beginning. He has always hated the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he lies, it is consistent with his character, for he is a liar and the father of lies.” Lying is evil and when we lie we are acting like the devil. Please don’t ever make light of lying.
So, what destroys trust? Lies. Many times lying is something we do because we do not have the courage to tell the truth. We are afraid that if we admit that what we did or didn’t do, was wrong, then people won’t trust us. Nothing could be further from the truth! What you did wrong might disappoint someone, yes, but lying over and over again destroy trust others have in you
The Apostle Paul says this to the church at Ephesus, yes to believers in chapter 4 verse 25: “So stop telling lies. Let us tell our neighbors the truth, for we are all parts of the same body.” This is what we need to do. Stop lying. Admit the truth. Then and only then will you be able to build good relationships with others. The Lord will help you. Slowly and steadily you will become someone who can be trusted.
Good relationships are built on trust and with God’s help we can become trustworthy.
Communication is how we maintain a relationship—right? God started this. The Gospel of John begins with these words, “In the beginning the Word already existed. The Word was with God, and the Word was God.” In Spanish, the literal translation says, “in the beginning was the verb.” Yes, verb, meaning action word. God created everything and "spoke” it into being. And God is still speaking to us through His Word, communicating what is essential for us to have good relationships.
I love to talk. I mean I LOVE to talk. But that, at times, has hindered my relationships. Why? Because talking and not allowing others to talk is not a good way of communicating. Yes, some people do NOT like to talk a LOT. But even those who are less talkative need to express themselves and need to be heard.
The Bible says in James 1:19, “Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must ALL be quick to listen, slow to speak...” Many of you have heard that women talk more than men. Whether that is true or not I don’t know, but I do know that I talk more than my husband, Rod. And if we’re going to have good relationships, we must learn to do what James told us to do. Number 1: Be quick to listen. Number 2: Be slow to speak.
I’ve led a class for New Believers for many years now in my church. There was one young woman that would barely say “hello.” To say she was shy was an understatement. And to be honest her timidity was a bit irritating to me. She, however, never missed a class and slowly she started to send me texts with her questions. Good questions. Then the Lord showed me how disappointed He was with my attitude toward her. Her words were few but her hunger for the Lord was deep. I did not know how to listen to someone who doesn’t talk that much. Yet she wanted to communicate and learn more and more about Jesus. I’m so glad she sent me those texts that showed me her heart. In time she and her husband began to help in the children’s ministry. What a blessing this couple has been to our church body!
Proverbs 1:23 says, “Come and listen to my counsel. I’ll share my heart with you and make you wise.” The first time I read that carefully I couldn’t believe that God wanted to pour out His heart to me! Even the Lord says, listen and I’ll speak. He wants you and me to LISTEN!
As we learn to listen, first to the voice of the Lord, then to others, the Lord will give us the ability to communicate the way we should and our relationships will grow better and stronger.
I want to tell you what nearly destroyed my wonderful relationship with my husband, Rod…Jealousy! Yes, that ugly and demonic thing.
I married in New York City (that’s where I was born and raised) but I moved to North Carolina because Rod worked for a Christian Television Network there. I was away from my family, away from my home church, with no friends, and my husband was working at a place that seemed to have beautiful women everywhere! Beautiful hostesses and singers, beautiful producers, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful girls seemed to inundate my insecure and weak mind. Every pretty face threatened me and so I vigorously tried to justify the way I felt. I said bad things about one particular girl, just to make her look bad. Jealousy turned me into such a monster that without any reason I would lash out at Rod and accuse him of wrongdoing!
Jealousy was destroying our marriage. It got so bad that I scared myself! So, I went to see a biblical counselor. Here’s what she finally said to me: “Dámaris, I rebuke you. It is obvious you are not a woman of the Word. God put you and Rod together for his glorious purpose and the enemy is trying to destroy your marriage. You need to repent and start reading your Bible.” My eyes opened real wide but I left there willing to do what she asked me to do.
Is jealousy ruining a relationship you have? Jealousy comes in many different forms. It could be a coworker that’s better at what she does than you are. It could be someone’s child gets better grades than your child. Remember that Satan is the first one who became jealous, and he lost everything because of it.
Listen to what James, the brother of Jesus Christ, says in chapter 3 verse 15: “For jealousy and selfishness are not God’s kind of wisdom. Such things are earthly, unspiritual, and demonic.”
That is so true. The first step to rid yourself of this horrendous state is to admit you are jealous. John 8:32 says, “And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” Only Jesus can free you from that ugly jealousy. And that will only happen when you know and admit that you are indeed jealous!
What I truly needed was to see that my jealousy was unfounded and wrong. I needed to repent. Listen, my dear friend, there will always be someone prettier, smarter, more creative, more talented, more understanding, more whatever, than you! But God made YOU for His glory and you need to see that jealousy is a way of being obsessed with yourself and that’s idolatry. Want to have a better relationship with those you are jealous of? Repent and ask God to make you grateful for the very thing that makes them so special in your eyes.
I’m Mary Lowman of The Christian Working Woman and this week I’m delighted to have my long-time dear friend, Dámaris Carbaugh speak to us about relationships.
Thanks, Mary. I’m delighted to be here. It’s interesting that if you look at someone’s info on Facebook it sometimes says “in a relationship,” and we all know what that means. Isn’t it interesting that none of us think that that person is married. Well, I’m very much in a relationship, and have been for 41 plus years with my wonderful husband, Rod. It’s telling, don’t you think, that our society doesn’t include married people as people who are "in a relationship.” As I’ve been thinking about relationships, it’s becoming increasingly clear to me that we need to learn what God intended for relationships to be like.
First, God created us to have a relationship with him. The Bible tells us in Genesis 1:26, “Let US make human beings in our image, to be like US.” Right from the beginning we see that the Godhead has always been in a relationship. Yes, God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit have always been in perfect communion! There’s no beginning and there will be no end to their relationship. I don’t think I’ll ever entirely understand why God would want to have a relationship with us—with me—it’s just a mystery to me. But I am so very thankful that he does indeed desire for me to know him and I can have a close relationship with God the Father, Son and Holy Spirit.
The Father sent Jesus. Jesus came to show us the Father. And the Father and Jesus promised to send us the Holy Spirit to show us how to live in right relationship with him and with others. Of course when we sinned our right relationship with God was broken. But praise God—the Bible also tells us that Christ died for us while we were still sinners and made us right in God’s sight.
You know, until we understand how to have a right relationship with God, we will never truly know how to have a right relationship with others. Our relationship with God will determine the way we interact with everyone. Our husband, our children, our co-workers, our brothers and sisters in Christ. Everyone we interact with will either reveal the good relationship we have with God or not. Relationships are a gift from God. Do you see it that way? I sure want to. If we yield to God, He will use our relationships as a means to show us His heart. Our beloved David says this in Psalm 16:11, “You will show me the way of life, granting me the joy of your presence and the pleasures of living with you forever.” David wants that because that’s what God wanted. Keep in mind that the Father loved us so much that He sent Jesus, the way, the truth, the life, so that we could be with Him in a perfect relationship forever!
Thinking about relationships and how they started with God—God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit—and they have been in perfect relationship for ever and ever and ever without end. I’m just thrilled that he made us to have relationship with him and to have relationship with others. Relationships can be glorious and relationships can be extremely difficult. But God wants us to really understand the beauty of relationships because that is what we will have with him for ever and ever.
I must interrupt this message to remind you to READ YOUR BIBLE! I have promised God that wherever I go and wherever I speak I will give this message! I was so ignorant for so many years about so much because I was not in the Word of God. You can be in church, like I was, and doing good things like listening to good preaching, attending Sunday School, singing in the choir, and so on, but still be very very ignorant of God’s Word.
I want you to have that in mind—that more than anything we are to love God’s Word. When I read it I’m not necessarily looking for some deep insight, but the more I read it the more I also understand what God is trying to say to me. Jesus said in John 5:39-40: “You study the Scriptures diligently because you think that in them you have eternal life. These are the very Scriptures that testify about me, yet you refuse to come to me to have life.” My prayer is that as I read the Bible that I would do exactly what Jesus said. That what I just read brings me to Jesus. It’s not just words on pages.
I was thinking about that and how this one horrible thing almost destroyed the relationship I have with my husband when we first got married. I got this attack of jealousy. I was incredibly jealous, and God helped me. I went to a biblical counselor. She started off with three lovely words— “I rebuke you!” She gave me some instructions and Rod and I started to do what we needed to do and God delivered me.
In reading my Bible I also see that there is a good jealousy—a perfect jealousy, a holy jealousy. He is a jealous God. He will not share his glory with anyone and he is jealous for his people. He refers to Israel sometimes as his wife and she is an adulteress who has left him and he is jealous.
And in Romans 11:11 Paul says that God will now save the Gentiles to make Israel jealous. So God uses jealousy, in a sense, to get us right with him. I thought about that and wow. We have that twisted jealousy that Satan has, because he looked at God and said, “I want to be where you are.” And that has kicked him out and has twisted us in many ways. But I hope to tell you something—that I’m still a little jealous. I want to say that I believe that it’s a good jealousy.
There’s one person in the Bible and I wonder—Lord, what was it with this man that you loved? There is one person in the Bible that God refers to as his friend. I want God to say “Dámaris is my friend!”
That person is Abraham. And the Bible clearly says this. What did Abraham do? We know that he believed. This man was in a pagan country where they worshipped many gods. God speaks to him clearly. He tells Abraham that he wants him to get up and leave his land and family. And go where I will show you to go. And the Bible says that he believed.
The Bible also tells us in Hebrews 11:6—without faith it’s impossible to please God. That’s what I just loved about Abraham. That when God speaks Abraham understands it’s God and he says “Yes!” And he gets up.
The Bible calls Abraham the father of all who believe. He is the father of all who believe. I pray “God make me more like Abraham. As I read your word, as I see things that are maybe a little difficult, that I would just believe.” That if this is what God wants me to do—then do it. Don’t question me. Be like Abraham. I’m jealous! I want to be like this man because God loved him.
The Bible also tells us that nothing moved him. And that God one day tells him to look up and see the stars and tha...
One translation of Romans 12:2 says: “Don’t let the world around you squeeze you into its own mould, but let God re-mould your minds from within, so that you may prove in practice that the plan of God for you is good, meets all his demands and moves towards the goal of true maturity” (Phillips translation “The New Testament in Modern English”).
I particularly like the first part that says “Don’t let the world around you squeeze you into its own mould,” because I believe we as believers are in a daily battle against conformity. Conformity to this world and its practices, its philosophies, its culture.
I’ve been talking about the absence of good manners in our world today, and this is one good example of how we can allow the world to squeeze us into its mold. I truly believe that every Christian should have good manners, not to please people, but to please the Lord.
What are good manners? Well, the list is quite long, but let me mention a few basic ones:
Being careful to say please and thank you appropriately Allowing other people to go first Not interrupting others when they are talking Having good table manners, such as not eating until everyone is served Returning phone calls promptly Being on time Keeping promises Special respect for elderly people Demonstrating kindness on the road
These are just a few that come to my mind. When we fail to have simple good manners in our society, we pollute our environment. Relationships are damaged because we are not considerate of others. We raise the general stress levels of our society; it’s simply more stressful to do anything or go anywhere because you are likely to encounter rude people. Careers are harmed by lack of professional manners.
But for us as believers, most importantly, opportunities to be a witness for Jesus are lost if we don’t demonstrate good manners. The uniqueness of our faith is that we have been made new creations in Christ through his grace and mercy, and we now have the power of God’s Spirit within us to enable us to care about others with sincerity. That means that in everyday life we should want to be polite because it gives us a chance to show the love of Christ to others.
If your manners are not in good condition, it could be because you weren’t taught them as a child or you’ve been shoved into the mold of the world around you. Either way, it’s not too late. Make it a matter of prayer and begin to consciously practice good manners. And remember, start with good manners at home, and then see how God can use it to bring glory to his name.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
My topic this week is good manners. Why good manners? Well, for one thing, they seem to be in short supply these days, and our worlds are becoming less and less civil and polite and that just adds another level of stress to our everyday lives. Secondly, good manners means simply being considerate of others, and surely that is the right thing to do especially if we are Christians.
Paul wrote to the Corinthians 8:21: “For we are taking pains to do what is right, not only in the eyes of the Lord but also in the eyes of men.” Good manners is doing what is right, including saying thank you and please, letting someone go ahead of you, returning phone calls promptly, having good eating manners—and a myriad of other things that used to be firmly taught in the home. Maybe that’s where the breakdown begins these days—we aren’t teaching or demonstrating good manners in our homes.
Well, our friend Fran has confronted her son’s lack of manners this week, and hopefully has helped him to see that he needs to be polite at all times. Driving to work this next morning, she is singing along with a praise and worship song on the radio when someone starts blowing his horn behind her. She looks in the rearview mirror and realizes he is right on her bumper. She’s in the left lane going the speed limit, but evidently he thinks she’s driving too slow.
She starts to put on her turn signal to change to the middle lane, but before she can, he pulls out and whips around her, almost running into her. He misses by an inch if that much. Fran’s heart almost stops beating, realizing how close she came to an accident. As he pulls around her, he gives her a very ugly sign and yells something profane at her.
Road rage, she thinks. Good grief, I’m not even safe driving the speed limit in my car anymore. It takes her back to this whole issue of manners, and how our society seems to have lost the civil touch.
“Lord,” she prays, “what can I do to keep from falling into this trap? All around me people are rude and uncaring and impolite, and it can be contagious. Please help me, Father, to maintain the good manners I’ve been taught and to pass them on to my children. Please help me, Father.”
After praying she immediately thinks of some thank you notes that she needs to write. “Good grief,” she says to herself, “I should have written those notes last week. Forgive me for my lack of good manners, Lord. I’ll write them at lunch today, for sure.”
You may not think of good manners as a spiritual issue, but I believe it is because good manners demonstrate a caring attitude and that is very spiritual indeed.
How are you doing in the good manners department? In our very rushed society with its frantic pace, often simple good manners seem to get lost in the shuffle. But don’t you believe it’s still important for those of us who believe in Jesus Christ to show the same care and concern for others that he did—and wouldn’t that include simple good manners?
Fran has been pondering these questions this week, as she has been confronted with poor manners on the part of her young son and her professional peers. Tonight, as she clears the dishes from the dinner table, she says to Drew, “Remember, we’re having a talk tonight, Drew.” He makes a face, indicating that he had hoped she would forget. But Fran believes it is important to nip his attitude in the bud, and she has prayed all day that Drew will listen and accept what she says.
Sitting down with him, she says, “You know, Drew, this morning you said that you’re not always polite and nice at school like I’ve taught you to be because the other boys in your class are not very polite. Is that right?”
“Yeah,” Drew hesitates. “I mean, it’s not cool to be saying please and thanks and stuff like that all the time.”
“Not cool, huh?” Fran says. “Well, what is more important, Drew: to please God or to please your friends?” Drew doesn’t want to answer that question. Fran continues: “The Bible says it’s better to please God than people. You know, Drew, if you try to be cool all the time, you’ll always be doing what the other guys are doing, and that could lead you into all kinds of bad things.”
She has a long talk with him about going along with the crowd and the importance of having a good testimony for Jesus at school. “You know, Drew,” she concludes, “your Dad was always very polite. Do you remember?”
He nods. “And if he were here, he’d insist on you having good manners just like he did. He would want you to realize that even if you’re different from the other boys, the right thing to do is have good manners like we’ve taught you. Your dad was a very special man, and he always had good manners.”
This reaches young Drew’s heart, and he apologizes to his mom. “I really am sorry, Mom. I know Dad would want me to be nice,” he says.
They pray together and Fran’s heart is lighter. As she lays her head on the pillow that night, she thanks the Lord for helping her and once again asks for his protection of her children in this world which is often so anti-biblical.
Are you teaching your children good manners? Do you demonstrate good manners in your home? I think we need to re-examine this time-honored tradition of being mannerly and realize that it’s the right thing to do.
Do you ever forget to use the good manners your mom taught you? In a world that seems to be less and less civil and more and more rude, it’s easy for us to fall into that pattern. But as Christ-followers, our lifestyles should be markedly different, and I believe that includes good manners.
Fran had a startling conversation with her ten-year-old son, Drew, this morning, and realized that the good manners she’s been trying to teach him seem to be defeated by the influence of his school friends. She has determined to have a long talk with him tonight about the importance of manners.
Arriving at work she looks at her calendar and realizes that she has to finish her preparations for a training session tomorrow. It’s an optional session that her boss asked her to conduct. She gets her handouts together and takes them to her assistant. “Linda, these are the handouts for tomorrow’s training session. How many people are coming?”
“I’ve only gotten return calls from three people, Fran, so I don’t know for sure,” Linda replies.
“Didn’t we put a deadline for responding, Linda?” Fran asks.
“Sure; they were supposed to let us know by last Friday. But hardly anyone ever calls. I have to get on the phone and call them, and then it’s phone tag for days,” Linda shrugs.
“But it’s in the memo that they are to let us know one way or the other, right?” Fran asks again.
“Right, Fran, but they just don’t do it, that’s what I’m telling you,” Linda says.
Returning to her office, Fran flops in her chair. Talking to herself she says, “What’s happening here? Isn’t it professionally correct to return calls, respond to requests, fulfill requirements? Is that no longer the professional thing to do?”
Her friend, Louise, walks in. “Talking to yourself again, I see. Be careful when you start answering yourself.”
They chuckle. “Louise, I’m bothered. It just seems to me that manners are quickly disappearing from the scene. Nobody bothers with simple everyday manners anymore.”
“You just noticed?” Louise responds. “Why? What happened?”
Fran tells her about the episode with her son this morning, and then the realization that the professionals in their own company don’t demonstrate simple business manners.
“Well, Fran,” Louise says, “you might as well get used to it. That’s the way things are these days. Nobody seems to have time to be polite.”
“You know what, Louise—this is a place where we can shine as Christians, don’t you agree?” Fran asks.
“You mean, we can be very polite to show them up?” Louise asks.
“Not to show others up but to demonstrate the kindness and consideration of others that Jesus always had. After all, that’s what manners really are—being considerate of others,” Fran says.
“You’re right about that,” Louise agrees.
“Let’s start a campaign for good manners, what do you think?” Fran asks.
With a furrowed brow, Louise considers her request. Well, what do you think? Should we Christians start a campaign for good manners? Do they really matter?
I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but it sure seems to me that good manners are in short supply these days. Just plain, ordinary, everyday manners. Well, our friend Fran has a few run-ins with poor manners this week; let’s see how she handles it.
Her son, Drew, now ten years old, walks into the kitchen where Fran is preparing breakfast. “Hey, mom, give me some money for school,” he says.
“Excuse me,” Fran replies. “What did you say?”
“I said give me some money for school; I need some lunch money,” he repeats.
“That’s what I thought you said,” Fran answers. “Drew, where are your manners? That’s not the way you ask for something, is it?”
“Oh, you mean I have to say please. Okay. . . puleese give me some money for school,” he replies in a smart-aleck way.
“Drew, I’ve taught you to have better manners than that. What’s gotten into you lately? You have to be reminded to say please and thank you . . . those are basic manners that you must remember, Drew.”
“Why?” he asks. “None of my friends say please and thank you.”
“Now, that’s not true, Drew. I know some of your friends, and their mothers have taught them to be polite, too,” Fran says.
“Well, maybe at church, but not at school,” Drew responds. “You know Alex—he says lots of bad things at school.”
“Alex Griffin?” Fran is astonished. Alex is the son of a wonderful couple at church and he has always behaved very well around her. “I find that hard to believe, Drew. He’s always very polite to me.”
“Yeah, ‘cause his mom’s around and he has to be,” Drew answers.
“Then does that mean that you are polite and nice only when I am around?” Fran asks, almost afraid to hear the answer.
Drew’s head drops and he pauses. “Well, sometimes, but I’m not as bad as Alex.”
“Drew, tonight you and I are going to have a long talk about manners and why they are important,” Fran informs him. “It’s one thing to go behind your mom’s back and do things you shouldn’t do, but you can’t go behind Jesus’ back. He sees and hears everything you do and say. Do you think he is pleased when you are rude; when you don’t have good manners like you’ve been taught?”
Drew shrugs his shoulders, unsure how to respond to that. But Fran doesn’t get the feeling that she has made her point with him. “Remember, tonight you and I have a long talk.”
As she drives to work, tears trickle down Fran’s cheeks thinking about what Drew said. “Oh, Lord, how do you raise kids in this sick world to be decent people? How can I teach my children even the most basic everyday manners and help them see that they are important? Am I just overreacting? Am I just outdated? Oh, Lord, please give me wisdom and guidance.”
Manners—have you let yours slip lately? Does it matter if you do? After all, not many people have good manners these days. Should a Christian worry about it?
Fran has been chosen to work with Jim Clark, a big-time Vice President, on a bid for a new account, Mitchell's Commercial Cleaners, a new and growing popular franchise. It's a very good opportunity for Fran; she feels honored to be chosen. She only had one day's notice that Jim would be in town today to meet with her, so she stayed up late last night, reading and learning all she could about Mitchell's.
Even though she went to bed very late, she's awake before the alarm goes off, with the adrenaline pumping. She feels too excited to sit still but knows that she needs some quiet time with Jesus to center herself and her thoughts before this day begins.
She says to the Lord, "I'm so thankful you're going to be with me, Lord. Will I ever need you!” She re-reads the verse in Isaiah 50:7, which the Lord gave her for this very situation.
Because the Sovereign Lord helps me, I will not be disgraced. Therefore have I set my face like flint, and I know I will not be put to shame.
"I'll keep that verse in mind all day, Lord," Fran says, as she excitedly starts to get ready for work.
She arrives at the office half an hour earlier than usual and reviews her notes. She remembers what the Lord showed her this morning through his word: “Your future does not rest on this job, Fran,” she says to herself, “or on this new prospect, or on this meeting with Jim. Your future is in the Lord’s hands, not his.” This really helps Fran get her eternal focus, and she feels very prepared and ready.
She heads for the conference room, where Marilyn introduces her to Jim, who doesn't look like Fran imagined he would. He's about six feet tall and quite good looking—maybe five or six years older than Fran.
As she shakes hands with Jim, he looks straight in her eyes and gives her a disarming smile. All of a sudden she is self-conscious. They take their seats, and Fran gets out her notes. She feels herself getting nervous, and sends up a quick, quiet prayer to Jesus for calmness. Once again she is reminded that he is always with her; that really helps a lot.
And with that, a long morning of discussion begins. Just before lunch, Marilyn explains that she must leave because of a prior commitment with another client, which surprises Fran. She had expected her to be with them for the day.
As she leaves, Jim turns to Fran and says, "Well, where do we go for lunch?"
"Lunch?" Fran responds. "Well, I suggest we order something so we get the most out of our time today."
"Well, I think we need to get away for lunch, Fran. You can choose the restaurant," Jim insists.
Fran feels uncomfortable and suggests inviting a coworker along for consultation. But Jim doesn't want to include anyone else, and he insists they leave immediately.
Fran has this knot in her stomach about being alone with Jim in a non-business setting. As they are seated at the restaurant, she again prays silently, "Lord, stay close by. I may need some help before this luncheon is over."
She is reassured of his presence and remembers that her first allegiance is to God. There’s no reason for her to be intimidated by Jim’s position.
As their meal is almost finished, Jim turns to Fran. "Marilyn tells me you are a single mom; your husband died not long ago, I believe."
"Yes, a few years ago. He was killed in an accident, and I have two children," she replies.
He hasn't taken his eyes off her. "Well, you certainly have a promising future, Fran. I would say if all goes well, you can expect to be moving up fast and making lots more money. This account alone could increase your income by $10,000 this year—easy, maybe more.” Jim waits for Fran's reaction.
She gulps hard and says, "Well, there's no denying that the money would be helpful."
"And if we pull this off, Fran, you'll get top level exposure in the company. I'll be executive in charge of the account, and you and I will be working very closely together," Jim says, with an emphasis on very.
Jesus said, “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another” (John 13:34). In his book Tom asks the question: “Why did Jesus need to give his followers a new commandment? Weren’t there already plenty of commandments in the Old Testament?” (p. 95).
He then explains that Jesus is saying that they now need to love in a new way, the way he loves. Not out of duty or by trying to keep the law, but from a genuine concern for the other person. And Tom gives us a very practical way to keep this new commandment: “Rediscover the attitude of love in the everyday habits of your life” (pg. 96). I love that thought because I can see how it works out in my life.
As Tom says, “Much of life is routine. If you don’t allow love to become a part of the routine of life, love will be missing from the majority of the minutes in your day” (pg. 97). So, how do we do this? It’s simple: As you’re doing whatever routine thing you’re doing, say to yourself that you’re doing it out of love.
Example: You’re cooking supper for your family. As you prepare, put new thoughts into your head. Instead of thinking about how tired you are, or how unappreciative they are of what you do for them, or how much you don’t want to cook supper tonight, think instead, “I’m doing this because I love my family. I’m showing love by cooking supper tonight.”
I know—you’re thinking, what difference will that make? Try it! For at least a week, determine by God’s grace that you will do your routine tasks from an attitude of love, and just see what happens. For example, if you are a teacher, remind yourself that you are teaching the kids because you really want them to learn and you care about them.
If you will change your thought patterns and choose to think about the good of the others in your life, I can promise you it will make huge improvements in your relationships. It’s the new commandment that Jesus gave us, to love like he loves, and when you obey Jesus, you cannot fail.
For a donation of any amount in the month of November 2021 you can receive a copy of The Relationship Principles of Jesus by Tom Holladay - while supplies last.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
Did you know that what is going on in your mind is affecting your relationships? I’ve been sharing some thoughts from Tom Holladay’s book, The Relationship Principles of Jesus, and he makes the point that “What’s happening in your heart is serious business. You may think that the self-pity you heap on yourself every day isn’t affecting your relationships. But it is” (p. 114).
Maybe you’re thinking that you cannot change the way you feel, and you’re probably right about that. But as Tom says, “You cannot change the way you feel, but you can change the circumstances that are causing the way you feel. And then the feelings will change” (pg. 114).
Let me give you an example. Suppose you work with a person of the opposite sex and your relationship has become very close. In fact, though you are single and he is married, you’ve allowed this relationship to go way beyond the boundaries of friendship, and you’ve spent much alone time together, allowed the conversations to become quite intimate, and you’re only a step away from beginning a physical relationship—committing adultery.
You know you need to end this relationship; you know it is wrong; you know God is very displeased with your behavior. But you’ve convinced yourself that you simply can’t break it off; it has become too important to you. Or perhaps you’ve convinced yourself that you can just back it down and keep it under control. Those are lies from your enemy, Satan, and you could not be more wrong.
So, what you have to do, if you want to avoid misery and heartache beyond belief, not to mention you want to live a pure life to please Jesus, is to take whatever drastic steps you have to take to change the circumstances that are causing you to feel this great need and love for the wrong person. You change jobs, you change churches, you move to another city—whatever it takes. You can’t change your feelings, but you can change your circumstances that are causing the feelings.
Jesus said if your hand offends you, cut it off; if your eye offends you, cut it out (Matthew 5:29-30). It is his principle of dealing drastically with temptation and sin, and believe me, you are well-advised to put it into practice if necessary. You’ll never regret going God’s way.
For a donation of any amount in the month of November 2021 you can receive a copy of The Relationship Principles of Jesus by Tom Holladay - while supplies last.
Jesus said we are to love our neighbor as we love ourselves, but the question is, how can you just love someone on demand? We’re talking about relationship principles based on what Jesus taught us. And I’m using some thoughts from a book by Tom Holladay entitled The Relationship Principles of Jesus.
Tom begins chapter 9 in his book by stating that “You cannot command an emotion, but you can command an action.” He goes on to say that “Understanding the difference between emotion and action—between what you feel and what you do—empowers every relationship you have” (p. 89).
Have you ever fallen “out of love” with someone you once loved, or vice-versa? I’ve known married couples who were getting divorced because one of them simply declared, “I don’t love you anymore.” A counselor might say, “But you should love your mate.” Will that solve the problem? No, probably not, because you can’t command an emotion out of anyone.
Tom says in his book, “You can’t command an emotion, but you can command an action. When Jesus says, ‘I command you to love one another,’ he’s not saying, ‘Feel this way’: he’s saying, ‘Act this way.’ Act with love toward another person” (p. 90).
Is there someone in your life right now that you should love, but you don’t? Here’s what you do. Ask yourself what you would do for that person if you did feel lots of love for them. Maybe it’s a mate or a parent or a child or a sibling—someone close to you, and yet you feel no love for that person. But if you did, what would do? You’d say nice things, you’d do something for them, you’d be interested in what they are doing, you’d spend some time with them. So, pick an action that you would do if you felt like you loved that person, and do it. You can command an action, so do it out of obedience to Jesus Christ and for the sake of the relationship. Then trust God to bring back the feelings that made it easy to love them before.
What about other relationships that aren’t so close—like bosses or employees or co-workers? They’re your neighbors, right? You’re supposed to love them as you love yourself. So, even though you may not like them, what would you do for them if you did really like them? Help them do their work, or be willing to go the extra mile, or give them some appreciation? So, pick an action and do it. You can command an action, and it could make profound differences in your relationships if you did. If you do what you’re supposed to do, regardless of your feelings, you will find that usually those feelings eventually return.
For a donation of any amount in the month of November 2021 you can receive a copy of The Relationship Principles of Jesus by Tom Holladay - while supplies last.
Are there some relationships in your life that need improving? Most of us would definitely have to say yes to that question. I’m sharing some thoughts from a book by Tom Holladay entitled The Relationship Principles of Jesus, which have challenged me and so if you’d like some help with some relationships in your life, this book gives you practical, biblical help.
I love this quote from the Peanuts character, Linus: I love mankind! It's people I can't stand! Well, Linus, the truth is it’s easier to talk about loving mankind than it is to love your neighbor as yourself. In his book Tom asks how did Jesus love?
He didn’t spend all night making to-do lists of which people he would show love to the next day. He didn’t have some kind of prioritization grid though which everyone who wanted his love had to pass. He simply loved people as the opportunity arose during the normal traffic patterns of his life (p. 74).
This is a powerful relationship principle from Jesus, if you and I would just practice it. I often remind myself that no one is in my life by accident, and yet far-too-often I treat some of those people that come into my normal traffic pattern as though they are a nuisance, an interruption. Loving the people who come into our normal traffic pattern each day is something we can do, by God’s grace and by asking God to help us see them as he sees them.
This doesn’t mean we hug everyone’s neck and have lengthy conversations with everyone in our traffic pattern. But it does mean that we see beyond the outward appearance and we intentionally remember that they are important to God, they are created in God’s image, they have souls that will spend eternity somewhere, either heaven or hell, and they deserve our respect. They deserve a smile, a kind word, a recognition from us that they are not a nuisance; they are important.
Tom says, “Make the choice to love the few you can love today, trusting in the greatness of God that he will put the right people in your path on the journey of life” (p. 75). We have to make a daily choice and pray this principle into our lives, and then God’s Spirit will remind us and empower us to simply love the people who come across our paths during the normal traffic patterns of our lives.
Can you even imagine the impact this one simply principle would have if we lived it out everyday?
For a donation of any amount in the month of November 2021 you can receive a copy of The Relationship Principles of Jesus by Tom Holladay - while supplies last.
A book by Tom Holladay entitled The Relationship Principles of Jesus gives some very helpful information about our relationships. I’m going to share some of the golden nuggets you will find in this book.
As I’ve often said, relationships are the sandpaper of our lives. They are almost always our biggest challenge, and yet Tom points out that nothing is more important than relationships. He says, “A life without relationships may well be a simple life, but it is also an empty life” (p. 27), and that is so true. So, you and I should place a very high value on our relationships. Do you value your relationships more than money? More than success? More than doing your own thing?
In Philippians 2:3-4 we read: “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.” If we truly consider others better than ourselves and look to their interests, we will definitely be placing a high value on the relationships in our lives.
How do we live out this principle of considering others better than ourselves? Tom points out that you have to get outside of yourself for your relationships to change. For example, when someone interrupts you—maybe a coworker who asks a question—and you are irritated at the interruption, you have to get outside of yourself in order to consider their interest rather than your own.
I find that I can practice this principle a lot when I’m driving. For example, someone is trying to push his way into the line of traffic in front of you instead of waiting his turn. My blood starts to boil and everything in me wants to prevent that person from getting in front of me. But if I can stop and think, maybe he has a real emergency, or if I can remember a few times I’ve done that myself, then I can allow that person in line, lower my blood pressure, and put that person’s interest ahead of my own.
Today or tomorrow, as you face the day ahead for you, ask God to help you practice this principle of getting outside of yourself and being willing to put someone else first. Whether it’s in traffic, in the office, or in your home, you could see some dramatic changes in those relationships because you put the other person first.
For a donation of any amount in the month of November 2021 you can receive a copy of The Relationship Principles of Jesus by Tom Holladay - while supplies last.
To give a little more background to the Fran stories, Fran is a single mom, a young widow, who was suddenly thrust back into the job market after her husband’s untimely death. Like most single moms, she struggles with the many hats she has to wear now. Thankfully, she has a good support system from her parents and her church family, but finding the right balance is a continuing challenge.
She has made it her practice to rise early each day and have time for Bible reading and meditation as well as prayer. She tries to journal most days and recognizes that in order to face all of her challenges at work and at home, she needs to be spiritually strong. It’s been a few years now since Jim died, and she has done well on her job and her kids seem to be growing and thriving normally. She makes it a habit to talk with Jesus throughout her day, to remind herself of his ever-abiding presence.
This morning, as she closes her Bible, she says, “Well, I better get dressed for work or I'm going to be late. Thanks for this time of encouragement with you, Jesus. These quiet moments alone with you each morning make a real difference. Now, job one: get the kids up and ready for school.”
As she arrives at the office, there is a note on her desk from Marilyn, her manager. Fran reads out loud, "Please see me as soon as you arrive. Hmm, wonder what this is all about," Fran ponders. “Well, Lord, I don't know what I'll have to face and so I’m glad you’ll be right there with me."
She heads toward Marilyn's office. Peeking her head inside, Fran says, "You wanted to see me?"
"Oh, yeah, Fran, come on in. Have a seat. I think I have some exciting news for you.” Marilyn says with a smile.
"Well, you've got my curiosity up, Marilyn," Fran replies.
"Here's the deal,” Marilyn says. "We've got a shot at a new client—a big one, Fran: Mitchells Commercial Cleaning Services.”
With that news, Fran's eyes double in size. "Mitchell's? I’ve seen them around. Are they a franchise or what?”
“Yes,” Marilyn replies. “They're one of the fastest growing franchises in the country. It’s a big deal, Fran, and a great opportunity. They’re looking for a new agency and we're one of the three they are considering. So, top management has assigned a Vice President from headquarters to oversee this bid, and since they are headquartered here, we will be assisting him. I met with him yesterday, and after a lot of discussion, he and I have picked you to assist him in trying to land Mitchell's."
Fran's mouth is hanging open. She says, "What, Marilyn? Really? I'm going to be assigned to this prospect—working with a Vice President? Me? I don't know what to say. Obviously, I'm honored, but I have to admit, I'm also scared."
"You'll be fine, Fran. You know how to put a proposal together, you're good on your feet, and I think you'll get along well with Jim. That's who you'll be working with—Jim Clark, VP of marketing."
The mention of Jim Clark strikes a note of fear. "Jim Clark—wow. I've heard all kinds of stories about how tough he is," Fran replies.
"Yes, he is tough. But he's good and fair, and if you perform the way I know you can, you won't have any problems with him," Marilyn assures Fran. "Now, he'll be here tomorrow and wants to spend the day with you setting the strategy. Your first meeting with Mitchell's is next week, so there's no time to waste."
As she heads back to her office, Fran can't hide her excitement. "Jesus, this is really a big deal. Wow, just think, Jim and Marilyn chose me above everyone else in the office. Oh, Ed's gonna be furious when he hears this. I'm sure he'll think he should have been chosen; he thinks he's the best. It will really goad him because they gave it to a woman over a man," Fran says to herself with a chuckle.
“So, you think you’ve made your mark, is that right?” Jesus asks quietly.
"Well, guess I must be doing something right, huh? Wow, just think, I'll be working with Jim Clark.
Proverbs 18:17 says, “The one who states his case first seems right, until the other comes and examines him.” This proverb is very good advice for us on our jobs.
What it teaches us is to withhold judgment and opinions until we've heard both sides to any story. We shouldn't be gullible and we shouldn't jump to conclusions.
This is a particularly difficult area for me, for I am very impulsive and very much an over-reactor. And every time I do that, I regret it. I am by God's grace focusing prayer and attention in my life on learning to wait until I hear both sides of any story, to make sure I've got my facts straight, to remember that there may be something here I just don't know yet.
I remember coming into the office on a very busy day, to find a message that irritated me at once. With only partial information, I thought this other person was doing something way out of line, and I overreacted. I went to the phone and started dialing the number, to get things straightened out. Thankfully, she was not in and I didn't get to speak with her at that time.
When she did return my call and explained the situation, I realized that the message had not been complete, and if I had talked with her earlier, I would have overreacted and probably hurt her feelings. God protected me that time and reminded me how much I need to learn not to overreact.
Wise Solomon warned us that the first person to present their case can sound very convincing, because we haven't heard the other side of the story. We need to listen to people, but not be too quick to agree or disagree with them until we've sorted the facts out and know what we're dealing with. This is good advice for managers and employees alike.
Well, I want to encourage you to go to the Proverbs daily for guidance. There are 31 chapters, so you can read the one that corresponds to the day of the month. I've been doing that for several years, and many times God has used the Proverbs to give me clear guidance, especially on job-related issues.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
The book of Proverbs is wonderfully applicable to the situations we face in our working worlds.
Proverbs 6:2-5 gives us some very practical advice:
If you have been trapped by what you said, ensnared by the words of your mouth, then do this... to free yourself, since you have fallen into your neighbor's hands: Go—to the point of exhaustion... Allow no sleep to your eyes... Free yourself, like a gazelle from the hand of the hunter, like a bird from the snare of the fowler.
How many times have you wanted to crawl under a table because you said something that you wished you hadn't? Perhaps they were words spoken in anger or haste, or words of gossip, or judgmental words. Unkind, untruthful, harsh, unnecessary words that inflicted harm of some kind.
What do you do? You can't unsay them; you can't delete them; you can't erase them. Those words hang there in your memory and the memory of others. What can you do?
Solomon says to go and humble yourself to the person your words harmed; go, confess to them, and do it immediately. Apologize and do all you can to free yourself from the damage of those words.
Now, I know that's not easy to do. But it's a lot easier than not doing it! Once in a hotel on a business trip, I accused a hotel employee of neglecting to follow my instructions. I was certain that I had given those instructions. So, nicely, but directly, I said, "I'm sure it's your fault; please correct it.”
Well, a few minutes later I came to realize that I was the one who was wrong, not him. It was embarrassing; I wanted to run away. But I forced myself to go to the phone, call the young man and apologize to him. Even a simple apology like that wasn't easy, but once I did it, I felt so free. And I could tell that it made a big difference to him. He kept saying, "That's so nice of you to call. Thank you.” Well, it wasn't nice of me; it was the right thing to do.
If you've offended someone with words, don't procrastinate. Go right now, today and apologize. That's good advice from Proverbs.
Does God care about how you conduct your business affairs? Proverbs 11:1 tells us that he does.
The Lord detests dishonest scales, but accurate weights find favor with him.
Dishonest scales represent cheating people; swindling people out of money that they deserve. And the Lord abhors any business practice like that, whether simple or sophisticated.
Another translation of Proverbs 11:1 says that a false balance is an abomination to the Lord. This is very strong language. The Holy Spirit wants us to know that God hates deceitfulness and deception of any kind when it comes to business transactions. It offends him personally when we misrepresent anything in a business transaction, when we fudge the numbers a bit to make a better impression, when we tip the scales in our favor. God sees it; he knows it; and he hates it!
If you’re in a position of selling to customers, you need to be totally honest about your product or service. Often sales people are seen as those who can “talk a good talk,” make things look good even if they’re not. But a Christ-follower should never be guilty of that kind of deceitfulness. That would be a dishonest scale.
I remember many years ago my mother bought some curtains, and when she got home she realized that the clerk had under-charged her. Well, she just couldn’t get in the car and get back to that store fast enough to pay the fair price for those curtains.
The clerk was astonished when mom returned to pay what she owed. Can you imagine how many people would ever do that? But my mom and dad were always scrupulously honest, and it never even occurred to her to do anything except go back and pay what she owed.
As Christians in the workplace, one of our distinctives should be our honesty in all dealings, whether buying or selling. When we refuse to take advantage or deceive or fudge the numbers, it gives us an opportunity to glorify our Father in heaven. God delights in us when we have that kind of honesty in our business transactions.
So, remember, as you go about your business dealings, God cares deeply about how honest you are. He abhors dishonest business deals, but he delights when we are careful to always be squeaky clean in our business transactions.
I’m focusing on Proverbs for Business from the book of Proverbs, which has 31 chapters. I encourage you to read one chapter every day.
Proverbs 10:4: Lazy hands make for poverty, but diligent hands bring wealth.
Over and again the Bible admonishes us as Christ-followers to be diligent workers. God gave Adam the first job description and “put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it” (Gen. 2:15).
The Apostle Paul often condemned laziness. To the church at Thessalonica he wrote:
1 Thessalonians 5:12-14: Now we ask you, brothers and sisters, to acknowledge those who work hard among you, who care for you in the Lord and who admonish you. Hold them in the highest regard in love because of their work. And we urge you, brothers and sisters, warn those who are idle and disruptive, encourage the disheartened, help the weak, be patient with everyone.
Have you noticed that idleness—laziness—often leads to disruptions. You’ve heard the old saying that “idle hands are the devil’s workshop,” and it’s true. Staying busy and productive will keep you out of trouble.
2 Thessalonians 3:10: For even when we were with you, we gave you this rule: “The one who is unwilling to work shall not eat.”
Giving people money who have the ability to earn it but are lazy is not doing them any favors. Requiring your children to work for their allowance is a good way to teach them that hard work brings success.
In telling the parable of the talents, Jesus gave the strongest condemnation to laziness. To the one servant who did nothing with his talent, he called him a “wicked, lazy servant.” Laziness is a sin. And we are living in a world that condones it, that rewards it sometimes with unearned money, causing some people not to even try to find a job.
You may not be the smartest person on your job, or the most educated or the most experienced. But you can always be the hardest working, most diligent person where you work. That is a wonderful testimony of your commitment to Jesus Christ. It is one way your light can shine in a dark world.
I believe that the book of Proverbs is the best management and employee relations book ever written. I'd like to look at five different proverbs and how they relate to our jobs. I encourage you to make Proverbs a daily reading habit. There are 31 chapters, so it's easy to read the chapter that corresponds to the day of the month. I've been doing that for several years and find the practical advice has been most beneficial in my life.
Let's look at Proverbs 22:10. It says, "Drive out the mocker and out goes strife; quarrels and insults are ended.” Another translation reads, "Drive out the scoffer and contention will go out. Even strife and dishonor will cease” (NASB).
Have you ever worked with a person who was a mocker and a scoffer? That's the person who makes fun of others, who ridicules people and organizations, who is arrogant and causes problems seemingly on purpose. When there's a mocker in the group, the work environment can be pretty miserable.
This proverb says that by getting rid of a mocker, you get rid of strife. For those who are in management positions, it's good to remember that there are times when the best thing you can do is to let an employee go. Now, I hope that doesn't sound cruel, but a person who is intent on offending others—and some people are—can have very detrimental effects on an organization.
Of course, as Christians, we still must care about people regardless of how unlovable they are. And though we can never change people, the Holy Spirit can, so we shouldn't give up praying for them. But that doesn't mean we allow them to ruin the working environment for everyone else. Remember, the workplace is not a rehab center or a counseling office. You should help people when possible, but you don’t hire people to reform or change them; you hire them to do a job.
My experience tells me that many managers need to bite some bullets for the good of the organization, and drive out the mockers and the scoffers that are disrupting the workplace. It's some good advice found in Proverbs.
I want to talk about living loved. Living as one loved by God.
Do you believe, really believe that you are deeply loved by the Father? Are you living as one who is deeply loved by Jesus?
I’m not sure what season you are in these days. You may be in a place where your faith and relationship with Jesus are thriving and you feel near to God. You may feel distant from the Lord, perhaps dry and weary. Or, you may be in a dark night of the soul. A place where you are experiencing confusion, fear, uncertainty and doubts about God. Maybe you are questioning your faith. Maybe you are caught in a pattern of sin and think you have outrun the love, grace, and favor of God.
When I became a follower of Jesus 24 years ago, nobody ever told me there would be seasons in my faith. Seasons of highs and seasons where I felt deep lows. Long stretches of intimacy with Jesus and days, weeks and months where I felt distant, distracted, and despondent. I have experienced the highs and lows in my faith, and everywhere in between. So no matter what season you are in today, you are not alone. Sometimes just knowing that you are not alone when you struggle in your faith is the reassurance you need to press on and not give up - to keep leaning into and receiving God’s unconditional affection and favor.
I want to share a few things I have been learning and relearning in this season of my faith. We are going to be taking a look at Ephesians 3:14-21.
As we mature as followers of Jesus, God calls us to be transformed by the renewing of our minds. This is a daily pursuit. Transformation of our minds happens when we think God’s thoughts after him. And we have his thoughts written in his Word. If you have not made it a daily practice to be in his Word, consider this as a loving nudge and reminder. We take in so much information around us on a daily basis. It is vital that we intentionally fill our minds with what is true, pure, and praiseworthy.
Before we dig into Ephesians, let me pray.
Father God, show us your heart today, ground us in your presence. Open our eyes and help us to see you, open our hearts and help us to know you. Open our ears to hear your truth and our mouths that we would rejoice and praise you. We desire a fresh word, a fresh encounter with you Jesus. Holy Spirit counsel and guide our hearts, minds, and souls. Help us to be present to your presence, to soak in your affection for us. We love you, Jesus and it is in your name that we pray. Amen.
There is a quote that I have repeated several times since I heard it. It’s a quote by the well-known pastor and author, AW Tozer. He says, “What comes to mind when we think about God is the most important thing about us.”
What we believe about God and how he feels about us informs the way we live. What we believe informs our work, our relationships, our lives.
Let’s look at Ephesians 3:14-19 This is the Apostle Paul’s prayers for the Church at Ephesus… to the believers and followers of Jesus.
Paul prays these words...and I pray these words over you.
…I kneel before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love,… and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
The first thing to notice about Paul’s prayer is that he is kneeling before the Father. This position of prayer is one of reverence and humility. And Paul prays that we are rooted - firmly fixed, grounded - in the love of Jesus. Picture a tree and its root system that goes deep into the earth. The roots make the tree immovable, no matter what season comes it’s way, it is firmly planted.
Paul prays that we are grounded - established - entrenched in the love of God.
I really love coming alongside people and helping them navigate conflict. But if I am honest, I can find it hard to navigate conflict in my own relationships at times. So I want you to know, I am growing with you!
At times it takes me longer to address conflict because I fear hurting the other person’s feelings, getting rejected or jeopardizing the relationship. And frankly, leaning into conflict is just downright uncomfortable. At the same time, I don’t like unresolved conflict that creates further tension. It takes courage to address conflict. It takes a desire to create and contribute to healthy relationships.
For a little motivation, consider counting the cost of avoiding conflict. It is estimated that unresolved conflicts cost companies $359 billion dollars each year (Crosby, The UnCommon League, 1.8.18). What is unresolved conflict costing you and your relationships? There is a price that we pay, and that others pay. Conflicts can continue to fester when ignored and stay with us until we face and resolve them.
How can we initiate a conversation to address conflict? One way may sound like this……
“Our working relationship is really important to me. I was thinking about what happened between us. There are things that I could have and should have done better. I didn’t live up to my values/my convictions as a follower of Christ. Can we sit down and talk?”
Or….
"I’d like to see if we might reach a better understanding about ___________. I really want to hear your thoughts and if you are open to it, share my perspective as well."
Those are just two examples of how to start a conversation.
Here are some final things to consider:
Talk directly to the person you need to talk with. Don’t go around them or talk about them. Don’t email them. Talk to them face to face if possible, or on the phone if necessary.
Remember to stay humble. The person might not respond in the way you had hoped, at least initially. Give it some time. Know that you are not responsible for their response, but you are responsible to exhibit Christlikeness and obedience to godly wisdom in conflicts.
Be grateful for the opportunity that conflict can bring and what it can produce in you when approached in a godly way. Applying wisdom to conflicts does not always guarantee the outcome we hope for but avoiding conflict will only make a situation fester. Pray, ask God to help you, tell the person how important the relationship is to you and do your part to contribute to a healthy relationship.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
Let's talk about overlooking an offense. I was listening to a podcast the other day and the message was about being unoffendable. The question posed was, “Is it really possible to be unoffendable?” And the answer was… you guessed it…. Yes. And let’s be honest, it can take hard work to overlook an offense.
Now first let me say we now live in a culture where we see some people so easily offended it is astonishing. The art of having a respectful conversation while having differing opinions and disagreement has been lost! Some people are on the lookout to have a reason to be offended.
Proverbs 12:16 says: Fools show their annoyance at once, but the prudent overlook an insult.
Be thoughtful, be wise. Don’t be a fool.
Many disputes are so insignificant that they should be resolved by quietly and deliberately overlooking an offense.
Proverbs 19:11 says: A person’s wisdom yields patience; it is to one’s glory to overlook an offense.
Overlooking an offense is a form of forgiveness, and involves a deliberate decision not to talk about it, dwell on it, or let it grow into pent-up bitterness or anger. Resolving conflict is impossible if you’re unwilling or unable to forgive others. Resolution lies in releasing the urge to punish, which can serve only to deplete and drain your life. Demonstrate a readiness to forgive and forget, and to move past the conflict without holding resentments or anger.
And avoid triangulation. Triangulation is when, for example, you are upset with your co-worker Susan and instead of overlooking an offense or directly addressing the conflict with Susan, you complain and gossip to Jim. Call it venting, problem solving, or sharing a prayer request, but it’s really sin.
Is there an offense that God is calling you to overlook? Ask Jesus to help you.
We have done a lot of self-examination when it comes to conflict. Asking God to search our hearts, owning our part in the conflict, being quick to listen...seeking to understand the other person’s point of view, and overlooking an offense.
We are talking about conflict and applying God’s wisdom to our current relational challenges. We all have conflict and we all need help navigating through it at times.
The reality is that conflict can trigger strong emotions and can lead to hurt feelings, disappointment, and discomfort. When handled in an unhealthy manner, it can cause resentment and rifts that seem irreparable. But when conflict is resolved in a healthy way, when we apply God’s wisdom, it increases our understanding of the other person, builds trust, and strengthens our relationships.
James 1:19-20 says: My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.
Now notice that James says, “Be slow to become angry.” He is not dismissing or discounting anger but he gives a strong admonishment. Be quick to listen, slow to speak. In other words, don’t lead with anger! And, check your anger. Often anger is an unwarranted reaction.
When conflict triggers strong emotions, objectivity can go out the window. We tend to react before we listen. When we lead with emotion in responding to conflict we tend to base our response on our perceptions of the situation, not necessarily to an objective view of the facts. We can jump to conclusions and make assumptions about another person and their actions and motives.
While we may feel like we are right about what we are seeing and experiencing in conflict (and by the way, the other person is most likely thinking they’re right, too), we may not realize that our perceptions are often influenced by our life experiences, our values and our own beliefs.
So how do we apply the biblical wisdom that James is throwing down?
When James says, “Be quick to listen,” this is a charge to stop, take a deep breath, pause, and try honestly to see things from the other person’s perspective. Empathize with their viewpoint.
We can be so committed to our point of view that we dismiss how another person may be thinking or feeling. So take time to listen. And be slow to speak. The natural tendency may be to play defense, but this is where humility comes in handy. Remain calm, non-defensive, and respectful in your reactions. Be mindful of your facial expression, body language, words and tone. And as my friend Nicole would say, …remember: quick, slow, slow.
Whether you’re experiencing conflict at work, home or school, applying biblical wisdom can help you resolve differences in a healthy way and build stronger, more rewarding relationships. We invite the Holy Spirit to search our hearts when we find ourselves in conflict. I want to talk about contribution vs blame.
James 4:1 says: What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? Or as the Message translation says...They come about because you want your own way, and fight for it deep inside yourselves.
Here James is reminding us that often it is our desires within us that contribute to conflict, yet, if we are honest, most of us point the finger when we are facing relational discord. It can be so easy to place blame on the other person rather than noticing how we have contributed to the conflict at hand.
Now I can just sense the defensiveness rising up in some of us as we hear that we have contributed to a relational rift. But this is where humility comes in. Are we willing to take an honest look at how we have contributed to the conflict? If your immediate response is, “I have not done anything to contribute to this conflict,” consider this question…… “If there were a way that you have contributed to the current conflict, what would it be?”
If you are truly committed to resolving conflict you will take an honest assessment of your thoughts, actions, and behaviors. Remember the old saying: it takes two to tango. Now this doesn’t mean that the other person hasn’t played a part in the strife but owning your part will go a long way towards resolution.
Think of a current conflict. Ask yourself, what part have I played? What do I need to own? What do I need to die to in this situation? What might I need to let go of and confess? How might operating from judgement, pride, and the need to be right be hindering the relationship? Get honest with yourself. Confess your part to God. Receive his forgiveness, put yourself in a posture of humility. Listen, we are all prone to self-righteousness and blame, but humility and owning our contribution to a conflict, positions us for growth and deepening of relationships.
I’m Lisa Bishop and I will be sharing biblical wisdom as it relates to conflict… in the workplace (or in any relationship for that matter).
If you have a pulse, you will encounter conflict several times throughout your lifetime. Conflict is a normal part of any healthy relationship. Now there is a difference between healthy and unhealthy conflict which often has to do with the circumstances surrounding the conflict and our approach to it. Yet one thing is true… people can’t be expected to agree on and see everything the same way all the time.
There are many ways we can relate to conflict. Some of us love it, some of us hate it and try to avoid it at all costs (which really is not possible, by the way). Some of us, if we are honest, love to stir up conflict. We all respond differently when conflict arises. And often the way we experienced conflict being handled when we were growing up influences our current relationship to conflict.
Yet there are biblical ways to engage when we don’t see eye to eye so that we can resolve conflict in a constructive way that keeps our relationships strong and growing. One of the first things to consider is reframing conflict. Not seeing it as bad or wrong but seeing it as an opportunity. When we see conflict as an opportunity and not a threat, when we see it as a way to gain understanding and build relationships, as an opportunity to grow… relationships can deepen.
As followers of Jesus, we have an incredible opportunity and responsibility to engage with conflict in a way that puts the glory of God on display. As God’s image bearers, we are on this planet and in our workplace and relationships to image him and that includes how we engage with conflict.
I can’t say that I always remember to honor God in conflict situations. Often my flesh is tempted to take over. But as we unpack how to apply wisdom in conflict, here is my invitation. When you find yourself in a conflict situation, when you feel anger, irritation, hurt or anxiousness rising, start with Psalm 139:23-26.
Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.
Ask God to search you. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you see anything in you that has contributed to the conflict, and be open to what he shows you as you ask him to lead you.
Learning when to ignore—it’s true that it almost sounds like anything but a Christian message, don’t you think? Yet, truthfully there are times when we need discernment about what others are telling us and we truly need to ignore them. However, I want to reemphasize the importance of listening to others, too. It’s a wonderful way to show people compassion and a caring attitude—just by listening. But the opposite side of that truth is that there are times we should absolutely ignore what other people are saying to us. Not rudely, but quietly, just ignore.
I saw this as I was reading about a time when Jesus chose to ignore people. That story is found in Mark 5:21-43. Jesus was approached by a synagogue ruler, Jairus, who pleaded earnestly with him to come and heal his little daughter who was dying. Here was one religious leader who was ready to believe in Jesus. Interesting how people can become believers really fast when they're in trouble, isn't it?
Jesus agreed to go see his daughter, and on the way to his house some of Jairus's friends met them and reported that his daughter was dead, so there was no need to bother Jesus anymore. If ever there were words of death and gloom, this message was certainly that. "No need to try anymore," they told Jairus. "Forget it. Give up. Jesus might have been able to heal her, but she's dead now, and there's nothing he can do. So, don't even bother bringing Jesus with you. Just come on back home and mourn with the rest of us and bury your daughter.” This was the message Jairus's friends gave him.
Jesus heard what they told Jairus. Notice in Mark 5:36 how he responded: "Overhearing what they said, Jesus told him, ‘Don’t be afraid; just believe.’“ In response to those words of death and doom, Jesus told Jairus to believe and not be afraid, and he completely ignored their bad report.
Jesus ignored them because he knew what he intended to do, he knew the power of God in him, and their message of hopelessness was one to be ignored. Now, imagine how Jairus must have felt at this point. First, his friend—people he no doubt knew and trusted—report that his dear little daughter is already dead. I'm sure he knew they wouldn't tell him that if there was any doubt in their minds. Yet, here's Jesus telling him to ignore their report, refuse to be afraid, and continue to believe that Jesus will heal his daughter.
Who does Jairus believe? Of course, he wants to believe that his daughter is not dead, but if he believes Jesus, he could really make a fool out of himself if she is dead. What does he do? Well, evidently Jairus chooses at this point to believe Jesus because they continue on their way to his house. And both Jesus and Jairus ignore the words of death and doom that his friends have delivered.
Now, we need to understand that Jairus's friends weren't trying to do him any harm. Indeed, they were simply trying to make him face what they thought was reality. Obviously they didn't have faith in Jesus' power; they only believed what they could see, so their words to Jairus were faith-destroying words. I wonder what they said to Jairus during that walk to his house. Do you think they kept on trying to convince him that his daughter was dead and he was foolish to believe Jesus? I imagine they did, and in fact they probably thought he'd really gone off the deep end now. But Jairus ignored them—his good friends—and chose to believe Jesus.
Then we see the scene when they arrive at the house. Everyone had declared the girl dead, and they'd already begun their mourning, crying and wailing loudly. You really have to put yourself in Jairus's shoes now, as he approaches with Jesus. Everyone is telling him, by words and actions, that his daughter is dead. Jesus is saying to ignore them, not be afraid and believe, and he's choosing to believe Jesus. But he looks very ridiculous to his friends. In fact, when Jesus announced to these unbelieving people that the child was not dead,
Here’s the word of wisdom for today: The quality of your work reveals your character.
Did you ever realize that your work tells what kind of person you are? The Bible tells us that the works of God reveal to us what kind of God he is. The beauty of his creation, the majesty and grandeur of his universe give us a clear view of his character and his personality.
That's true of us as well. Just suppose someone who doesn't know you at all was asked to write a description of you based upon an audit and inspection of your work. What would that audit reveal?
Are you careful to do your work with thoroughness, or would your work reveal a careless attitude? Does your work show that you are considerate of the person at the receiving end or at the next stage of your work? Or would the inspector conclude that you're in a hurry to get through and get going, because your work is sloppy?
When your work involves dealing with other people, would it reveal an attitude of respect and concern for others? Do you think the inspector would conclude that you care about other people, and you treat everyone with respect? Or would it reveal a callousness toward others, treating them like numbers and not bothering to be kind and considerate toward them?
Could anyone tell by the quality of your work that you do it as unto the Lord? Would it look different from those who aren't Christians?
As I look at the work of God's hands, I know so much about his loving, caring nature. His work reveals his character to me. You work reveals your character as well. Would you be pleased to have someone describe you based on the work you've done this week? It's a good word of wisdom we need to think about frequently.
I’ve been giving you words of wisdom for the workplace this week and we’re offering these words on cards that you can use to remind yourself of God’s wisdom, or you may want to pass some along to someone else who needs them. You can find them on our website christianworkingwoman.org.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
Do you need a word of wisdom for the workplace today? I’m offering nuggets of wisdom for the workplace.
Here’s my word of wisdom for today: Don’t let anxiety or fear rob you of God’s peace.
Are you feeling anxious about something today? Are you very disturbed over a situation in your life? Does it seem impossible to find any rest and peace right now? All of us have gone through and are still going through difficult times, which creates anxiety and fear. A passage in Isaiah 48 is very helpful when you are not at peace. Here are verses 17 and 18 of that chapter-
"This is what the Lord says—your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: I am the Lord your God who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go. If only you had paid attention to my commands, your peace would have been like a river, your well-being like the waves of the sea."
Anxiety and unrest are often a result of our failure to pay attention to what we know about God. Rarely do we need some new truth or principle to help us out; we just need to practice what we know already.
I find that I rarely make a deliberate decision to wander from God's principles. It's simply a failure to pay attention to what I know already. My focus gets fractured. I move slightly off-center, simply because I haven't paid attention like I should.
And when that happens, I lose my peace and I’m anxious and frustrated. When you start to dig underneath those outward effects, you often discover that the cause is failure to pay attention to God's commands. It may be something that seems very small, but if we walk away from doing it God's way, we can expect to lose the peace and rest we so need.
The Lord told his people, "If only you had paid attention to my commands, your peace would have been like a river” (Isaiah 48:18). If you're missing peace in your life today, see if there's some area where you're not paying attention to God. Once you get that straightened out, that wonderful, marvelous, indescribable peace will return, like a river, flooding your heart and calming your nerves.
I'm wondering, have you read that verse which says, "Be kind to everyone who is kind to you. Be kind to the people you like. Be kind when you want to impress someone, or when there's something in it for you"? No, you haven't seen that verse in Scripture, but Paul wrote to Timothy that "...the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but must be kind to everyone...” (2 Tim. 2:24).
That’s my word of wisdom for the workplace today: Be kind to everyone.
So, today it’s “Be kind to everyone.” I once witnessed a situation where a Christian sister was obviously unkind to a person simply because she doesn't like that kind of person. Based on her prejudices and some bad experiences she had, she had classified a group of people as undesirable. And so, she was obviously unkind to this person.
My heart was hurt to see a Christian treat someone unkindly. Then I realized that I probably do similar things all too often. I mean, it's easy to be kind to people that seem to deserve our kindness. But the Bible says we are to be kind to everyone. That includes strangers, people who irritate us, people who are not kind to us—everyone includes everyone!
Once I was unkind to a clerk at a hotel who was not very efficient at her job. Her lack of efficiency inconvenienced me just a bit, and though I didn't say anything, I'm sure the look on my face and my body language was most unkind.
How easy it would have been for me to say something kind to her, to make her feel a little more comfortable, to forget my minor inconvenience and try to help her out a bit. The Holy Spirit hit me between the eyes as I walked away. The Lord's servant must be kind to everyone, even people who don't do their jobs as well as they should.
Where do you often fail to be kind? Shore that area up with prayer, and ask God to help you to be kind, as the servant of the Lord should be, to everyone.
Are you tired today? Well, if so, I have a word of wisdom for you. I’m giving you wisdom for the workplace, and you can have these nuggets of wisdom on some cards we’ve prepared. Then you can use the cards to remind yourself of these important principles, or you may want to give some to others who are struggling with workplace issues.
Our second wisdom for the workplace is: Remember that being tired is inevitable, but if you’re tired for the wrong reasons, then you need to take some action.
First, let me assure you that it's okay to be tired. Jesus was often tired while he was here on earth. You remember when he went sound to sleep on the boat and a terrible storm didn't awaken him. He was tired. We read in John 4:6 that he was tired from a long journey.
We know that Jesus understands our tired bodies and minds because he experienced all that while he took the form of man here on earth. He sympathizes with our weaknesses and the limitations we face. Just knowing that helps me a lot.
But we need to determine if we're tired for the wrong reasons. Have you been trying to be all things to all people lately? That's exhausting—and you can never succeed. Perhaps you've taken on jobs God never intended you to do, and you're tired from trying to do too much. Maybe you're trying to do everything to total perfection. Perfectionists are usually very tired people, trying to prove something to themselves and to the world by being perfect all the time.
You may be tired because you've got your priorities confused. Someone has said, "There's always time to do God's will," and I think it's true that God would never ask of us more than our bodies and minds can do without going into overload and burn-out. But when we confuse our priorities, it causes weariness and exhaustion.
Remember this important message from Isaiah 40:30-31: “Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”
I want to offer you some specific wisdom for the workplace. And in fact, I want to you to have a set of cards with these nuggets of wisdom which you can take to your job, use them for yourself, or even give to others as an encouraging word. You’ll find those at christianworkingwoman.org.
Wisdom for the workplace from Luke 12:15: Jesus said, "Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed."
So, this greed problem is nothing new. And we certainly must watch out for the many different kinds of greed. There's greed for power, the drive to have authority and influence over other people. And greed for prestige and fame. Of course, greed for material possessions is very commonplace. Almost daily we hear of another scandal where greed for money has driven people to destroy their whole lives. And sadly, we’ve seen greed rise to the surface during this coronavirus pandemic.
When you think about it, greed is pride. It is that desire within us to show the world who we are by our status in life, by our possessions, by our fame. Greed is a direct result of the pride of life.
And greed is contagious. If you're around people who have lots of things and who focus their life on getting more and more things, you'll discover that it's very difficult not to be swept right along into that greedy mindset for things.
And greed is cancerous. It grows fast, and it consumes and destroys everything it touches. No wonder Jesus said we must be on our guard against all kinds of greed.
Jesus went on to say that a man's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions (Luke 12:15). Greed can overtake us quickly and completely distort our priorities and our commitment to the Lord. I wonder if what we’re going through—what we’ve been through in the last months—has helped many of us Christ-followers to see that the abundance of things is not important. That would be a big plus to take from this pandemic.
Jesus said life is more than food or clothes; life is peace and contentment. Those can't be bought; they are found only in Jesus.
Our wisdom for the workplace today is: Be on your guard today against all that greed that surrounds you, especially in the working world. It wants to drag you right into its currents, but by God's grace, you can be victorious.
Visit christianworkingwoman.org for your set of these ten cards with Wisdom for the Workplace.
You may be familiar with this verse from James 1:5: “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.” God wants us to be wise, and the good news is, he will grant wisdom to us as we recognize our need for it and go to the source of all wisdom, our God.
We also know from Scripture that the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. So, we want the wisdom that God imparts, not the world’s fake substitute. So, this is the pre-requisite: Do you fear the Lord? Do you know and respect the one true God through a personal relationship with his Son, Jesus? That’s where God’s eternal wisdom begins. Assuming you do, here are the questions you need to ask yourself often. I believe these questions will help you avoid lots of trouble, keep you from shooting yourself in the foot, as we say, and greatly increase your effectiveness, regardless of where you are or what you’re doing.
Question #1: Do you think before you speak?
How many times have you said something—jumped quickly to give your opinion or your advice or add your two cents—and as soon as you said it, you wished the ground would just swallow you whole?
Proverbs 29:20 puts it so well: “Do you see someone who speaks in haste? There is more hope for a fool than for them.”
I’ve often said, “I may not be good but I’m fast,” as though it is a good thing to be fast. Well, maybe it is sometimes, but to speak in haste is almost always a bad idea. Note there can be a difference between doing something with haste and doing something in haste. There are times when we do need to act with haste, quickly, for good reasons.
David prays in Psalm 70:1, “Hasten, O God, to save me; come quickly, Lord, to help me.” We often pray for God to act quickly, right? And then later in Psalm 119:60, the Psalmist says, “I will hasten and not delay to obey your commands.” That’s the kind of haste we all need. There’s no question we should hasten to obey the Lord with no delay.
But speaking in haste is speaking without giving it proper thought; speaking without thinking of how it could be perceived by someone else. It is speaking foolishly.
Proverbs 12:18: The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.
When you choose your words carefully, thoughtfully, not in haste, you can do so much good. Proverbs 18:21 says: “The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” So, if you want to be wise, ask yourself, “Do I speak words of life or death? Do I think before I speak?”
Question #2: Did you sleep on it?
The simple old adage, Sleep on it, can save you lots of trouble. A wise person takes time for decisions, big and small ones, because the choices and decisions we make on a daily basis set the direction of our lives. Think about decisions that you regret. I can easily bring some recent ones to my own mind, and when I look back on decisions that didn’t turn out so good, it was always because I simply didn’t “sleep on it,” didn’t pray enough about it, didn’t always seek good counsel.
Again, from Proverbs 15:22, we read: “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.” Wise people seek counsel from those they trust. Wise people are able to live with delayed gratification, resisting the impulse to go for the immediate reward, the instant answer. How often do you tell yourself just to sleep on it, talk to somebody you trust, pray lots?
I love this verse from Jeremiah 6:16a: “This is what the Lord says: “Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls.” When you’re at a decision point, especially a fairly significant one, stand at that crossroad, ask for God’s path, the good way. That’s how you make wise decisions that bring soul rest for you.
Question #3: Have you heard both sides?
Do you remember the parable Jesus taught about the wise and foolish builders? You’ll find it in Matthew 7. The wise man built his house on a rock and when the rains came and the winds blew, it stood fast. The foolish man built his house on the sand, and it could not endure the rains and the winds, so it fell with a great crash, as Jesus tells the parable.
I’ve asked the question: Do you want to be wise? And I’ve pointed out principles from Proverbs that teach us how to become wise. Jesus had a lot to say about being wise too, and this parable is a good one. It, of course, refers to whether we build our lives on Jesus, our Rock, or we try to find life somewhere else, from someone else. And this is true not only for the decision we make to accept Jesus as our Savior, but also the daily decisions you and I make about many things—on our jobs, in our families, at our churches.
Building something on sand is faster than building something on a rock, but the wise person doesn’t take the easy way out. I have a tendency to want to get a job done quickly, so I often can forget this wise principle. My husband has to remind me that my easy way won’t work; it will fall apart sooner or later. So, if you want to be a wise person, build your life on the Rock, Jesus Christ, and build your daily lives on good decisions that are based on rock-strong principles.
In James 3:13 we read: “Who is wise and understanding among you? Let them show it by their good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom.” That really sums it up well, doesn’t it? If you want to be wise, show it by the good way you live and by helping others in humility. And then don’t forget what James told us in chapter 1:5, “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.” Please take this promise and practice it. Ask God for wisdom—every day! He promises to give it to you, and as you become more and more wise, you will be more and more like Jesus, you will be shining his light in a dark world, and you will avoid a lot of heartaches and problems.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
Would you describe yourself as a wise person? My guess is that not too many of us think of ourselves as wise, but as Christ-followers, we should aspire to be wise, to gain wisdom and to avoid mistakes. This holds true in your personal life, on your job, with your family and friends—in all walks of your life because we all need wisdom—God’s wisdom—to navigate this world we are in.
I’ve been looking at what you need to focus on if you want to be a wise person, from the book of Proverbs, and here is another one from Proverbs 9:9: “Instruct the wise and they will be wiser still; teach the righteous and they will add to their learning.” A wise person will accept instruction, even if it’s not given in the best way. Often criticisms will come your way from people who make poor word choices, or people who don’t have your best interests at heart. And if you’re like me, your first reaction is to totally resist it, throw it in the trash bin, and forget it—because you didn’t like the way it was said to you.
However, if you want to be a wise person, you need to listen to the instruction, the criticism, and consider the validity. There may be some good advice there for you that will make you wiser still, if you will accept instruction.
And one further principle from Proverbs 29:11: “Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise bring calm in the end.” A wise person is not easily enraged, and knows how to bring calm to explosive situations.
It’s the difference in a reaction and a response. A wise person knows that her immediate reaction needs to be controlled because often that reaction is angry and vengeful. And when you react instead of responding, you usually regret it later on because it usually makes matters worse. So, learn to take deep breaths, send up an emergency prayer, and ask God to keep you from giving vent to your anger, and instead find ways to calm a situation.
Do you want to be wise? If you do, I’m giving you practical things you need to do in order to be wise—all from the book of Proverbs. Here’s another one from Proverbs 11:30: “The fruit of the righteous is a tree of life, and the one who is wise saves lives.”
So, if you want to be wise, save lives! Next question: What does that mean? It means you do whatever you can to help others when they are in dire situations. You save people from wrong choices, from the trauma they’ve endured, from the abuse they are suffering—there are so many ways and opportunities you and I have to “save lives.” Certainly, sharing the Gospel is the most powerful life-saving thing you could ever do because it is through the Gospel that people are rightly related to God through Jesus and therefore will be saved from eternal punishment.
Proverbs 14:16 says, “The wise fear the Lord and shun evil, but a fool is hotheaded and yet feels secure.” Do you want to be wise? Then, fear God and shun evil. Fearing God means you fear displeasing him. As his child, you don’t have to fear his anger or wrath because he always does what is best for you, but because he is a loving and forgiving Father, you don’t want to disappoint him. That’s what it means to fear God.
And what does it mean to shun evil? It means you recognize how insidious sin is and you want to avoid it at any cost. You know that you can choose your sin but you can’t choose its consequences. So, you don’t go places that could tempt you to sin; you don’t spend a lot of time with people who could lead you astray. You turn off the television when what you are watching makes sin look normal, when you are being exposed to evil of some kind. Shunning evil means you are cautious, you don’t let down your guard because you know how vulnerable you are.
I’m showing you from God’s Word exactly what you need to do if you want to be wise. And who doesn’t want to be wise? Being wise is more than just being smart; it gives you the ability to make good decisions, avoid lots of mistakes and prevent you from taking wrong paths, and in the process, you will be a help to many others.
Proverbs 6:6 tells us: “Go to the ant, you sluggard; consider its ways and be wise!” So, what is it that a wise person needs to learn from ants? What is “ant wisdom”?
Ants work hard and are never lazy. Ants don’t let any obstacle stop them. You have seen an ant carrying something larger than it was, right? They are not discouraged just because things get tough. Ants plan ahead and work with precision in very organized ways. They store their food during seasons of plenty, and they also plan seasons of work and of rest to prevent burnout. Ants know that they can accomplish more by working together than by working alone. In their own way, they set goals and work together to achieve them.
So, here is “ant wisdom” if you want to be wise:
Work hard—be the hardest worker on your job. Don’t waste time; don’t be lazy. When you run into a roadblock of some kind, take it as a challenge and don’t quit. Be very good stewards of your possessions, your time, your money. Plan ahead for times of need. That means, save some money and don’t waste what God has given you.
Proverbs 12:18 says: “The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.” Here’s another principle if you want to be a wise person: Speak words of life, not death! Words have such power, and a wise person knows how to use that power in good ways—to bring healing and encouragement. A wise person will not be reckless with words. In fact, another Proverb says that when words are many, sin is not absent! So, a wise person will not be quick to share her opinions; she will not be reckless with words.
Do you want to be a wise person? I must admit that I rarely think of myself as wise. I mean, you have to be really old and really smart to be wise, don’t you? Well, of course, that is not true, and in fact, there is an entire book in the Bible—Proverbs—whose whole purpose is to help us become wise. So, being a wise person should be on our short list of goals we want to reach.
I’m going to take a look at what we learn from Proverbs about becoming and being a wise person. I believe it should be an intentional pursuit for each of us who are Christ-followers.
From the first chapter of Proverbs, we read: “let the wise listen and add to their learning” (Proverbs 1:5). So, here’s principle number one if you want to be a wise person: Listen and keep learning. You know, as long as you’re talking, you can never learn anything new—right? So, if you really want to keep learning, you have to learn to listen. And that means listen to anyone and everyone who can impart truth to you, knowledge that will help you make better decisions and keep you from mistakes.
One of the things I loved about my mother was that until her dying day at age 93, she had a thirst to learn and a willingness to change. She would never have called herself wise, but believe me, she was. She kept on learning all the days of her life.
And then, in Proverbs 3:7 we read, “Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord and shun evil.” So, the next principle for those who want to be wise, is: Humble yourself. Keep a close watch on the pride that can so easily explode in your mind, especially when you feel you’ve done a good job and accomplished a noteworthy goal. Remind yourself often that you don’t know it all, and you actually could be wrong! For some of us with strong opinions, that can come as a completely new thought: I could be wrong! A wise person is not wise in her own eyes; she is humble.
Well, today is not such a good day for Fran. In fact, she is at the point of tears as she comes back to her office from a business meeting with her most important client. Closing her door she plops in her chair and brushes away a tear that tries to escape. "Why did he say that to me?" she says out loud to herself. "Why would he be so cruel to me? I worked so hard on that promotion and he shot it down without even listening to my idea! "
"Feelings hurt today?" Jesus softly asks, though of course he has no need to know since he knows everything.
Fran is again reminded of his abiding presence in her life. "Well, I don't know if it's my feelings that were hurt. . ." she stammers; "I think it was the crass insensitivity and unprofessionalism of Mr. Andrews. He was unnecessarily brutal."
"Feelings are hurt, Fran," Jesus states. "Might as well admit it; nothing to be ashamed of. Everyone gets their feelings hurt from time to time."
“Well, yeah, I guess he hurt my feelings. I mean, I’ve worked so hard for that account and before this he liked everything I did,” Fran explains. “Now out of the blue he hits me with this response—so unfair, you know.”
"What exactly did he say?" Jesus asks.
"You were there, Lord," Fran replies, with a bit of frustrated sarcasm.
Jesus laughs. "Yes, but it would be good for you to repeat what has upset you so much."
Fran feels ashamed of her inappropriate reaction. "I'm sorry–well, he said that I had not researched this promotion adequately and he was not comfortable going with my idea until I did my homework."
"And what was wrong with that comment?" Jesus asked.
"What was wrong? I had an entire report backing up my idea. I did my homework. I always do my homework. That's what's gotten me where I am; everybody knows Fran does the job right," Fran responds.
“A bit defensive, are we?” Jesus quietly asks.
Fran doesn't like where this conversation is heading, so she suddenly gets busy with her work. "Nobody understands me," she mumbles to herself, all the time knowing it's not true. She’s not yet ready to give up her pity party!
As she's leaving the office that afternoon, her friend, Alice, pops in. "Hi, want to grab some pizza tonight with the kids?”
"Oh, Alice, I'm so glad you came by," Fran lights up. "I was going to call you and see if you could come over tonight. I need to talk with you."
"What about?" she asks.
"Oh, I had a rough meeting with Mr. Andrews. I need some advice," she replies.
They make plans for Alice to get the pizza while she picks up her children. After a time with the kids, some homework assignments and a Bible story, Fran gets Drew and Alice to bed. Then the two of them settle down for their long talk. "Okay, let me have it," Alice says.
Tears start to come to her eyes again and Fran says, "Oh, it's probably no big deal but Mr. Andrews really let me have it today in front of everybody. You know that big promotion I've been working on–well, he said I didn't have sufficient research to proceed and to 'take it back to the drawing boards,' to use his words. He said there were too many unanswered questions."
Fran pauses and looks at Alice, waiting for her response, still fighting to hold back her tears. Alice nods and says, "And. . ."
"And what?" Fran raises her voice. "Isn't that enough?"
"Well, I mean, is that all he said?" Alice asks.
"Don't you think that was very rude and unprofessional of him? I mean, in front of everybody. . ." Fran says in frustration.
"Who was there?" Alice asks.
"His assistant, Bernie, and Jim from the Art Department," Fran says.
"Uh, huh," Alice cautiously responds. "That's not exactly 'everybody', Fran," she says.
"Oh, you just don't understand, Alice!" Fran is angry. "I guess you're thinking it was just an overreaction.”
"Come on, Fran, give me a break," Alice says.
"How about giving me a break and trying to be understanding?" she says.
"Okay, I want to be understanding,
I’m completing our look at the nine characteristics of the fruit of God’s Spirit, as given to us in Galatians 5.
8 - Gentleness
Jesus described himself as “gentle and humble in heart” (Matt. 11:29). Peter tells us that our beauty should not come from outward adornment. “Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.” (1 Peter 3:4). Well, no wonder it is of great worth because it is the same spirit of gentleness that Jesus has.
Proverbs 15:1 says, “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” Gentleness solves arguments, halts anger, and restores someone who has sinned.
Do you have harsh attitudes toward people? I love this quote from Dairy of Private Prayers: “May I be willing to make the same excuses for others that I make for myself.” Are you quick to criticize and judge? The fruit of the Spirit is gentleness, just like Jesus.
9 - Self-Control
Proverbs 25:28 says, "Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self-control.” In Bible times cities had to have walls for protection. When those walls were broken down, anything and anybody could get in, to plunder, to kill, to destroy. And so it is with us when we lack self-control. We open ourselves up to destruction.
Look at your own life right now and ask yourself where your walls are broken down because of your unwillingness to exercise self-control. Even if it is only broken in one spot, the enemy will find that spot, and he will invade you and try to destroy you at that point. So, shore up your broken walls through prayer and maybe ask someone to hold you accountable in that area. That’s a good way to grow more self-control in your life.
I have prepared a booklet, which could help you become more intentional about allowing God’s Spirit to produce his fruit in your life. This goes into more detail and gives more helps on how you can allow the fruit of God’s Spirit to flourish in your life. It is exciting to see that you really can grow in all nine fruits.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
What is goodness? One of the evidences of the fruit of God’s Spirit in the life of a believer is goodness. And we’re looking at practical ways to grow more spiritual fruit in our lives.
6 - Goodness
We often say “God is good all the time,” but what do we mean by that? Do we mean that God does what I want him to do and answers all my prayers the way I want them answered? Do we mean that God pours blessings on us and therefore he is good?
Good means virtuous, righteous, morally excellent. And of course, God is good all the time. As you focus on being good, that doesn’t mean that you’re going to try to make everyone happy or jump through everyone’s hoops. It means, rather, that you are going to focus on being virtuous, righteous and morally excellent.
Second Peter 1:5 says: “For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge.” You may need to dig deep into your heart to root out those things that are not good. It might mean you have to change your television viewing habits, throw away some magazines or novels, stop bad habits of gossiping or complaining, make sure you’re always telling the truth.
7 - Faithfulness
First Corinthians 4:2 says: “Now it is required that those who have been given a trust must prove faithful.” We can only be of service to God if we are faithful people. You’ve heard it said that the best ability is dependability. That’s another word for faithful. Do you have a reputation for being dependable? Are you known as a faithful person, thorough in the performance of your duties? Do you always keep your promises? Is your word your bond?
A good motto to remember is “Under promise and over deliver.” Promise thoughtfully and sparingly, and then keep your promises no matter what! Grow that fruit of faithfulness until it is really big!
How do we let the world around us know that we are Christians? The most powerful witness we have is the way we live. If we consistently produce the fruit of the Spirit in our daily lives, as found in Galatians 5, the world will know we are Christians. I’m challenging you—and myself—to become more intentional about producing this fruit.
4 - Patience
First Thessalonians 5:14 says to “be patient with everyone.” Whoa! That’s hard to do, isn’t it?
It might be helpful for you to list those with whom you have the most difficulty being patient. List the situations that test your patience the most and pray specifically about each of these.
Then, decide what you are going to do when you begin to feel impatient. One sure-fire antidote for those feelings of impatience is to pray a quick prayer and/or quote a verse of scripture. Invoke God’s power; turn on the power of God’s Spirit in your life at these times, because you can’t do this on your own.
5 – Kindness
What does kindness look like? It looks like common courtesies, like “thank you” and “please.” It looks like allowing someone to get in line in front of you or letting a car into the line of traffic in front of you. Kindness is saying words that bring encouragement and comfort. It is taking time to help an elderly person or give a child a cheery greeting. Kindness may simply be a smile on your face, a friendly hello, a listening ear. Whatever form it takes, we all know and love kindness when we see it, don’t we?
Set a goal to do at least one kind thing for someone every day. Then, all through your day look for those opportunities. When you go out of your way to be kind, even in the very small things, it not only makes an impact on those to whom you are kind, it also comes back to you in many ways.
Proverbs 11:17 says that a kind person benefits himself. We reap what we sow, and when we sow kindness, it does indeed benefit us, too.
If you had an apple tree that never produced apples, you’d probably think something was wrong with it! As believers in Jesus Christ, if our lives are not producing the fruit of the Spirit, then something is wrong with us spiritually. So, I’m looking at the fruit of the Spirit, as found in Galatians 5 with some practical suggestions on how to make them flourish in your life.
2 - Joy
I love C.S. Lewis's definition of joy: "Joy is the flag that is flown from the castle of the heart when the King is in residence there.”
Would that describe you—that joy is something very evident in your life? You have to make it your goal to let the others know that the King is in residence in your life by being joyful. That means your face will be joyful, your words will be joyful, your attitude will be joyful, and your actions will be joyful. And when you are joyful, believe me, people will notice. It's the best witness you can have for Jesus.
Pray joy into your life each day; ask God to help you focus on all you have to be thankful for, and don’t let the world and the devil steal your joy!!
3 - Peace
Peter tells us that we must pursue peace—work at being peaceful, remember to refocus your mind on the person who is our peace, Jesus Christ. Remember this: Your day is won or lost in the morning hours. So, spend time each morning with the Prince of Peace, Jesus Christ, and in his Word, and he will impart his peace to you.
A friend came to know Christ because a co-worker was peaceful in the midst of a chaotic work environment. She noticed and finally said to him, "How do you do it?” He shared that it was his faith in Christ which made the difference and recommended that she read the book of John. She began to do that, and after a couple of months, Janet accepted Christ.
And it all started when one person was peaceful in the midst of chaos. What a testimony we could have to our world if we consistently displayed this wonderful fruit of God’s Spirit—peace!
Do you sometimes feel as though being a Christian in our culture today is against the law? The Apostle Paul faced the same kind of culture in ministering to Christians in Galatia—except his situation was even worse. Christians were literally persecuted, even killed, for their faith.
But he gave the Galatians a plan for living out their faith in that godless culture—a plan that could never be criticized or demonized—and a plan that would be totally effective. Let me read from Galatians 5:22-23:
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.
There is no law against the fruit of the Spirit. That’s what the Apostle is telling us. You can display these characteristics anytime, anywhere, without any impediment. No one can stop you; no one can take you to court for being:
Loving, joyful, peaceful, patient, kind, good, faithful, gentle and self-controlled.
Since this is the fruit of the Spirit, it is only through the Spirit that this fruit can become evident in your life. However, you have to cooperate with the Spirit, and become intentional about growing this fruit.
I want to talk about practical ways to grow this fruit in your life. And the first fruit is:
1 - Love
In 1 Corinthians 13:4-6 we see what this love—God’s love—is like:
It is patient and kind It does not envy or boast It is not arrogant or rude It is not irritable or resentful It does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
The love which is produced by God’s Spirit is an action, a decision to act in these ways, with or without the feelings. In fact, we can love people we may not even like!
So, here’s my challenge to you: Pray that God will help you to love those people you have to deal with, even those that you really don’t like. Seek to grow more of this fruit of love.
Each Sunday after our Pastor gives the benediction at the end of the service, he always says to us, “Now, go and be the church.” In other words, live out the truth that you’ve heard today. Make it real in your life wherever you are. So, I’m using his challenge to us as we consider the fruit of the Spirit from Galatians 5:
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Galatians 5:22 – 23
As Christ-followers need to take very seriously this directive to bear this fruit. So, my challenge for us is to “Be the fruit.”
To answer the question of what it means to “be the fruit,” I want to look at each of them and offer some suggestions of how you implement this fruit in your life. It is the fruit of the Spirit, so obviously it has to be a Spirit-empowered endeavor. But it won’t just happen unless we as disciples of Jesus Christ determine to “be the fruit” each day.
Let’s start with that first one: LOVE.
Here’s what someone wrote and I think it is a great way to be the fruit of love: True love needs a personal touch. Here's a way to show people you love them in an unexpected way. Get a package of blank greeting cards and make a list of friends and family – especially the ones you don't see often. Write them a short note that shares how much you appreciate them. Send your cards out at random far away from any holidays or birthday. Let the little love note surprise them!
Now, that is a practical way to be the fruit of love. And cards have a greater impact than an email, so spend a little money, buy a few stamps, and surprise some people with words of love.
Next is JOY. Joy should be the trademark of a Christian. When you are joyful, your strength increases, because the joy of the Lord is your strength. There is so much negativity and bad news in our world today that if you’re not careful, you can let the enemy steal your joy. That’s one of his favorite tactics. So, what’s been stealing your joy? Or I might ask, who has been stealing your joy? Whatever or whoever it is, realize that it is a satanic flaming arrow coming your way from the enemy, so put on your full armor and refuse to lose your joy. How? Sing good songs all day long. Find the humor in your day. Laugh a lot; laughter is incredibly good for you. Look for reasons to be happy, to be joyful.
Now we come to PEACE. Jesus said he would give us his peace, his unique peace that is strong enough for the toughest circumstances. So, have you ever gone to Jesus in prayer and said, “Please give me the peace you promised. I need peace.” I heard a statistic that 40% of all people in our country today are in some kind of depression or despair. Have you noticed how many people are searching for some kind of peace in this craziness? Remember, Jesus’ peace is not like the peace that the world offers. That peace is a bandaid; it seeks to make you feel better with a temporary pain killer, but it just makes things worse.
Peter wrote that we should seek peace and pursue it (1 Peter 3:11). Maybe you need to learn to take peace breaks when your day is going south. Just stop, find an alone spot, refocus your mind on Jesus, quote a verse to yourself and pray for the peace Jesus promised to give you. Pursue peace; go for it. Be the fruit—be peaceful!
FORBEARANCE is next in this list of the fruit of the Spirit. We call it patience, and it can be one of the most difficult fruits for us to practice, at least it is for me. But there are so many opportunities in your day to practice patience, right, and patience takes practice. So, pick one situation where you find it particularly difficult to be patient, and start working on it. When you go to the store, stand in the longest line to check out and make yourself wait. Talk to yourself, like: “Just cool it. This is not a big deal. You can wait a few minutes—it doesn’t change your life.” Something like that.
What are the five greatest spiritual dangers we face? I’ve offered what I see as the answer to this question. First, there’s the danger of self-sufficiency, then self-deception, self-esteem, and self-confidence. And we finish with number five,
Self-Satisfied
I’m sure you’ve noticed the common theme in all these dangers: self. We are our own greatest danger in many different ways. And here’s one that is very subtle but very dangerous: being satisfied with yourself.
Are you satisfied with where you are in your walk with God? If so, you’re not likely to grow very much. We need a holy dissatisfaction with where we are so that we will seek and find all that God has for us.
The Psalmist wrote: “As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, my God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God” (Ps. 42:1-2). Those are beautiful words that we quote and sing, but do we actually ever pant for God like a thirsty deer?
Now, this doesn’t mean that we live in a state of frustration or lack of peace. No, as A. W. Tozer writes: “O God, I have tasted Thy goodness, and it has both satisfied me and made me thirsty for more. . . I long to be filled with longing; I thirst to be made more thirsty still.”
If your walk with God is at a stalemate and you’ve been satisfied to just get by, I believe you’re in great danger of missing so many good things, because, dear friend, the sweetest blessings, the greatest joys are found as you get to know God better and better and pursue him as your highest ambition and greatest achievement.
So, if you’re in that self-satisfied, mediocre, neither-hot-nor-cold stage, pray that God will stir up in you a hunger and thirst for righteousness so that you are not satisfied with where you are and you push on to discover all that God has for you and wants to do through you before your life is over.
I hope you’ll remember these five great dangers: Self-sufficiency, self-deception, self-esteem, self-confidence and self-satisfaction.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
Have you ever thought about the spiritual dangers you face? Number four is:
Self-Confidence
It seems to be a universally accepted belief that we all should have self-confidence. But Paul wrote to the Philippians that we who are believers, who glory in Christ Jesus, should put no confidence in the flesh. He went on to list all the reasons he could put confidence in himself: he was from the right family, had the best education, had demonstrated great zeal and abided by the laws flawlessly.
But he said, “I consider them garbage, that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ—the righteousness that comes from God on the basis of faith” (Phil 3:8-9).
Why is self-confidence a great spiritual danger? Because it erodes our faith and trust in Christ alone. Any time we start thinking that we can do something on our own, or feeling as though we’ve achieved some position by our own efforts; any time we are confident about ourselves or our abilities, we are in a dangerous spot. That’s when we think we are standing firm, but instead we are most likely to fall.
I’ve noticed over the years that when a big event is coming up, a speaking engagement, a retreat, or whatever, usually the week before God has a way of reminding me that if I think I can do this on my own, I’d better think again. I’ll do something really stupid, or forget some detail, or get angry at someone and say something I shouldn’t—something like that. And I’ve decided it’s God’s way of whispering in my ear, “Don’t let your self-confidence become your Achilles heel; place no confidence in yourself. Remember, I use weak and foolish things of this world.”
Self-confidence is a great danger, but God-confidence is powerful. I’m confident he loves me and always will. I’m confident I can go to his throne with boldness at any time and he hears me. I’m confident that because of Jesus I have eternal life with God. And I’m confident I can do all that God wants me to do through Christ who gives me strength. That’s not self-confidence; that’s God-confidence.
Here’s danger number three:
Self-Esteem
That sounds very strange, doesn’t it? How could self-esteem be a danger? After all, everywhere we turn we hear that we need good self-esteem and we need to feel good about ourselves in order to have a good life.
Well, there are two key problems with our search for self-esteem:
We’re looking for the wrong thing. We’re looking in the wrong place.
Self-esteem—feeling good about yourself—is a biblical oxymoron, a self-contradiction. The Bible tells us that our own natural selves are sin-infested and capable of nothing good. We learn that even the best things we can do look like filthy rags to God. So, feeling good about something that is inherently sinful and selfish is looking for the wrong thing.
For ten long years I searched for self-esteem and tried so hard to feel good about myself. I thought a successful career would do it, but I achieved that and found it empty. I thought the right relationship with a man would give me those good feelings, but relationships came and went, and none of them brought me the fulfillment I wanted. I bought homes and clothes and accumulated things and recognition, but the more I piled on what was supposed to bring me good self-esteem, the emptier I became.
If you’re looking for self-esteem today, you’re in the same danger I was in. It’s a dead-end road taking you nowhere but to emptiness and disappointment. Let me encourage you to abort that fruitless search and instead, set your heart to know God. Jeremiah wrote: “Let not the wise boast of their wisdom or the strong boast of their strength or the rich boast of their riches, but let the one who boasts boast about this: that they have the understanding to know me, that I am the Lord, who exercises kindness, justice and righteousness on earth, for in these I delight,” declares the Lord. (Jer. 9:23-24).
Set out to know and understand God. The more you do, the better you will feel about yourself. I promise you—it’s true. Good self-esteem comes as a by-product of knowing God better and better, and appreciating who you are in God’s eyes.
What are the greatest spiritual dangers you face? I’m pointing out what I believe are our five greatest dangers. Here’s danger number two:
Self-Deception
My pastor once said that the problem with deception is we don’t know when we’re being deceived. Now you may think that is self-evident, but most of us don’t really think about the fact that if we are deceived, we don’t know it. For if, indeed, we knew we were deceived, we would no longer be deceived. Knowledge of the truth drives out deception.
Many people are self-deceived because they want to be. They don’t want to face the music and see things as they really are, so they purposely remain in deception. For some, the refusal to know the truth is their way of trying to avoid the pain that could bring. For example, you may choose to be deceived about your inability to get along with people and tell yourself that it’s not your fault, because you don’t want to face the fact that you have a problem. So, you deceive yourself in order to avoid the pain of admitting you have a problem.
Of course, as long as I choose to be self-deceived, the problem gets worse not better. Only truth will set you free from such a problem, but you have to face that truth and then respond appropriately.
Others are self-deceived because they don’t know the truth that will prevent the deception. Paul wrote to the Ephesians, “Let no one deceive you with empty words. .” (Ephesians 5:6). How do you know when you’re hearing the truth or something deceptive? You measure it by the truth standard, the Word of God. That means you must know the Bible well or you can be easily deceived by the empty and false words of all kinds of people.
Any time we live in deception, we are in great danger. I may be deceived into thinking there is water in an empty swimming pool, but upon diving in, neither the sincerity of my belief nor the innocence of my motives will prevent me from being killed by diving into an empty swimming pool. What dangers do you face today because you are deceived? Are you indulging in some self-deceptions? I encourage you to pray daily that God will reveal any deceptions in your life and show you the truth that will set you free from self-deceptions.
I believe there are five great dangers you and I face in our walk as believers. Here’s the first one.
Self-Sufficiency
If you buy into the common belief today that you are all you need, you are in great danger. Yet, that is considered a very worthy and admirable attitude by many people.
I well remember a conversation I had with a very successful businesswoman who had climbed the career ladder very fast and very high and had earned lots of money and recognition. She said to me, “I don’t need anyone but myself. I don’t depend on anyone but myself. I have learned that you have to take care of number one and not rely on others.”
Even though she didn’t recognize it, she was in great danger because the facts are she is not self-sufficient, regardless of her track record or accomplishments. You see, we may be able to get by with our self-sufficient attitude for some time and we may fool ourselves into believing it is true. But there will always come a time when you face the reality that you are not enough.
Death certainly is one checkpoint that shows up the fallacy of self-sufficiency. The Bible says
“. . . people are destined to die once, and after that to face judgment” (Heb. 9:27). This is one place for sure where we have to admit our inability to help ourselves, and place our trust totally in the Lord Jesus Christ. His death, burial and resurrection assure us that, through faith in him, we can face death knowing that beyond the grave is an eternity with God. But you can’t do that on your own. None of us is self-sufficient when it comes to dying. We are dependent on God.
The Apostle Paul had to learn that he was not self-sufficient, even though he was well educated, had the right credentials and was totally devoted to serving Christ. He faced a disability that showed him how insufficient he was. But he learned the great truth that God’s grace was sufficient for him, for God’s power is made perfect in weakness. If you want God’s power to be made perfect in your life, admit your weakness, confess that you are not self-sufficient, and know the wonderful freedom of operating in God’s grace, which will be totally sufficient for you.
I have to admit that I am not a graceful person. In my first year of college, during Christmas break, my mother signed me up for private lessons with a woman who coached me on how to be graceful. Now, for my mother to spend money on such lessons was an indication of how much help I needed! I was not then—still am not to this day—graceful.
But I’m happy to report to you that though I may never be graceful, I can be grace-full—full of grace. That is not contingent on my agility or nimbleness or any physical attributes. It is, instead, contingent on my openness to the grace of God and my willingness to let it fill my life.
In writing of our Savior, John says, “The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth” (John 1:14). Jesus was and still is full of grace. As believers in Jesus Christ, you and I are in the process of being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory. We are to be filled with his Spirit, and therefore, we have the incredible opportunity to be filled with grace. Like Jesus, we can be full of grace.
When asked what was the one thing about Christianity that sets it apart from all other religions, C. S. Lewis responded, “Oh, that’s easy. It’s grace.” No other religion offers God’s love and redemption coming to us free of charge, as a gift, no strings attached, no performance required, no standards to meet. Only Christianity dares to make God’s love unconditional. That’s because Christianity has the only qualified Savior, Jesus Christ.
I want to encourage you to become very intentional about becoming a woman—or a man—who is grace-full; full of God’s grace. It must become more than a cliché, more than words we say or songs we sing. God’s grace needs to permeate every corner of our being so that we are living examples of his grace. And then, when we are full of God’s grace, we can become grace dispensers.
The song, “Amazing Grace”, is sung all over the world by people who have no understanding of its message of salvation through Jesus. But the idea of grace appeals to everyone.
But what does it mean for you and me in our world today to live grace-full lives? What does that look like? I’d like to give you the ABCs of grace-full living. Here is “A”:
A- Abundant
Jesus said: “I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full” (John 10:10). Jesus wasn’t talking about being full of money, or earthly success, or freedom from problems. He was talking about a life that is grace-full!
In 2 Corinthians 9:8 we read: “And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.” When the grace of God fills us, then it must flow out to others in the form of good works. What good works? The good works that you were created to do. Ephesians 2:10 says “We are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”
Here are a few examples of how we dispense grace to others:
Someone is sick; you minister to their needs. Someone is rejoicing over good news, you rejoice with them. Someone has a broken heart. You cry with them, listen to them, sit with them, console them. Someone is wandering away from God. You confront them in love, admonish them, help them to come back into fellowship. Someone is lost in sin, without Christ. You share the gospel in every way you can, lovingly planting seeds of truth in their life. Someone needs financial help. You give out of love and concern. You teach the Word of God in a small group; you organize prayer for your company; you begin a Bible study at work or at home; you invite others to hear the Word of God.
These are just a few ways that we become grace dispensers to others, abounding in good works.
I can testify to you from personal experience that the abundant life Jesus...
I read this poem recently, entitled “Weather Report.” It talks about dancing in the rain.
Any day I am vertical is a good day, that’s what I say. And I give thanks for my health.
If you ask me, “How are you?”, I’ll answer, “I’m great” because in saying so, I make it so. And I give thanks I can choose my attitude.
When Life gives me dark clouds and rain, I appreciate the moisture that brings a soft curl to my hair.
When Life gives me sunshine, I gratefully turn my face up to feel its warmth on my cheeks.
When Life brings snow, I dash outside to catch the first flakes on my tongue, relishing the icy miracle that is a snowflake.
Life’s events and experiences are like the weather—they come and go, no matter what my preference.
So. . . I might as well decide to enjoy them. For indeed there IS a time for every purpose under Heaven.
Each season brings its own unique blessings. And I give thanks.
I know many are facing tough times these days; we’ve come through a most unusual and difficult year, living through a pandemic and you may still be unsure and fearful of what the future holds. But my friends, if you belong to Jesus you have what it takes to dance in the rain, to truly be joyful in the Lord always.
The Psalmist wrote: “You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my heart may sing your praises and not be silent. Lord my God, I will praise you forever” (Psalm 30:11-12).
Giving thanks forever is our key to dancing in the rain. I hope you’ll truly determine, by God’s grace, not to let fear or worry or despair overtake you. Instead to say with Job:
But he knows the way that I take; when he has tested me, I will come forth as gold (Job 23:10).
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
What does it mean to dance in the rain? We’ve seen that it means learning to be thankful in and for everything, to face our fears and attack them with God’s Word, and to keep our eyes fixed on Jesus.
Here is another important step in learning to do this rain dance, and that is to look for someone to encourage and help. Get outside of yourself; ask God to impress on your mind someone you should personally help. Then become very intentional about helping them, whatever that means. It could mean:
Giving them some money Giving them some time Helping them get a job Sending words of encouragement Providing a meal
Remember, you reap what you sow, so sow what you need.
If you need encouragement, sow it. If you need money, sow it. If you need help in finding a job, sow it.
Often when we’re dealing with some storm, we tend to become so focused on what we’re going through, that we forget that others are going through some tough times, too. And I can promise you that getting out of yourself and focusing on others is guaranteed to help you dance in the rain. You may be thinking that you can’t help others until your storm is over, but believe me, you can! In fact, one of the purposes for your storm is to give you understanding and sympathy for others in a storm.
Isaiah 58:6 – 9: Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke? Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter—when you see the naked, to cloth him, and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood? Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the Lord will be your rear guard. Then you will call, and the Lord will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.
Your help comes when you start caring and helping others.
I’m talking about dancing in the rains of life. We have seen that being thankful in and for everything is really what it means to dance in the rain.
You know, you can go through a storm and never realize God’s purpose for you in that storm. You can choose to worry, to complain, to be bitter, to manipulate and run and talk to everybody else about it, and totally miss the good God has for you in the storm.
If it’s your desire to really fly above your storms, to dance in the rain instead of responding in fear and dismay, step one in this rain dance is to face your fears. Storms tend to grip our hearts with fear. Every time we had a thunderstorm, my little dog would become very fearful. He would run to me, get close to me, and find a hiding place. It always made me reflect on how I react to the storms of life. Fear causes me to panic, to run, to try to get away.
I was talking with a young career woman about the challenges she is facing on her job, and she said that she has been so intimidated and made so fearful by her coworkers that she just wants to get out of there. My advice was that before she runs away from that fearful situation, she needs to have victory over the fear. Fear comes from the evil one, and if she decides to leave that job, it should be in victory, not in defeat.
As long as your heart is filled with fear, you won’t be able to dance in the rain. Fear is like wearing lead shoes; it keeps you bound and it’s hard to put one foot in front of the other, much less dance!
How do you get rid of fear? You attack it with the Word of God. Here are some good weapons to throw at your fear:
Psalm 23:4: Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me.
Psalm 27:3: Though an army besiege me, my heart will not fear; though war break out against me, even then will I be confident.
Romans 8:15: The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.”
These are just a few of the hundreds of passages that teach us not to fear. If you want to dance in the rain, then face that fear, and start literally quoting Scripture against it. It will set you free.
What does it mean to “dance in the rain”? The bottom line is, it means to have a grateful and thankful heart, no matter what your circumstances. The Bible says to “give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus” (1 Thessalonians 5:18). And again it tells us to “always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ” (Ephesians 5:20). We are to give thanks in our storms and for our storms. That is what it means to dance in the rain.
You may be thinking, Do you really expect me to thank God for being laid off, or getting a bad report from my doctor, or losing someone close to me, or watching my grown child stray far from God? Well, I recognize that seems difficult if not impossible, but those are not my instructions or my idea. It is the inspired Word of God to us—to give thanks in and for everything.
Frankly, I think it often just comes down to simple obedience—doing what God says to do even though you don’t want to, even when your heart is not in it. Maybe that’s what it means to give a “sacrifice of praise,” to thank and praise God when it just doesn’t make sense! I know God will honor that obedience.
James 1:2-3 says, “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”
That storm you’re going through, whether from God or simply used by God, is for a purpose—to supply something lacking in your life.
Is faith lacking in your life? A storm will grow your faith faster than anything else. Is joy lacking in your life? The joy of the Lord becomes your strength in a storm. Is humility lacking in your life? A storm will blow away that pride that is in your heart, put you on your knees and teach you true humility. Could it be that maturity is lacking? A storm will grow you up fast, and you’ll lose those childish ways, that immature attitude which has held you in its grips far too long. What is lacking in your life? Courage? A storm will give you a backbone and untie your tongue so that you are not ashamed of the gospel.
All things still work together for good for those who love the Lord, so that’s why we can dance in the rain!
Someone has said, “Life’s not about waiting for the storm to pass. . . it’s about learning to dance in the rain.” There’s a lot of truth in that statement.
You know, none of us is exempt from storms; and in fact, God sends and allows storms in our lives to be used for good. In Acts 27 we read about a storm that came upon Paul as he was sailing to Rome. Paul was a prisoner; and there he was as a prisoner in a storm. And don’t miss this: He was in that storm because God was sending him where God wanted him to be—in Rome. This storm did not catch God by surprise. God didn’t look down and say, “Oh, my goodness, what is happening to Paul? How in the world did he get himself in such a mess?”
No, Paul was in that storm because he was doing God’s will. He was a prisoner because he was preaching the gospel. You remember after Jesus had fed the five thousand, he told the disciples to get into the boat and go on ahead of him to the other side of the Sea of Galilee. They did what Jesus told them to do and guess what happened: They found themselves in the midst of a storm. Another time they followed him onto a boat, and he went to sleep, but without warning a furious storm came up on the lake. A storm on the lake and Jesus was in the boat.
In all these situations, Paul and the disciples were doing exactly what Jesus told them to do, and they found themselves in the midst of terrible storms. If anyone tries to tell you that a Christian is exempt from storms, they are not telling you the truth! Nothing in Scripture would validate that belief. In fact, just the opposite. Peter writes:
Dear friends, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal that has come on you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice inasmuch as you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed. (1 Peter 4:12-13).
Your storm has not taken God by surprise. So, as you face your storm today—or whenever it comes along—ask God to show you how to dance in the rain. To rejoice even in the midst of the storm. It is the joy of the Lord that is your strength, and if you will choose to dance in your storm, you will have the strength you need to endure it.
This first question is something most if not all of us can relate to. A listener said:
I made a fool out of myself yesterday in front of a man that I’ve been witnessing to at work. I know I’ve blown it and I just want to run away. What do I do?
I know how you feel. We’ve all been in that place where we wished the earth would swallow us up. But believe it or not, this failure on your part can be used by God as a witness to God’s forgiveness and love.
What you have to do now is to find an opportunity alone with that coworker and apologize. Explain that you’ve been convicted of how poorly you acted, and you’ve asked God to forgive you, which he has. Let him know that you are sorry you failed, but you know God has forgiven you and you can start again.
Sometimes failure can be a very effective avenue of witness. You see, that coworker fails, too, but without Jesus, he has no effective way of dealing with the guilt. By owning up to your failure and at the same time sharing God’s forgiveness, your coworker will see grace in action. God’s grace is very attractive and it could be the very example he needs to accept that grace for himself.
Here's another question you’ll no doubt relate to:
I have a coworker who leads a very immoral life, and I keep trying to witness to her. However, she just makes fun of me. How do I get through to her?
Your coworker is in need of a life-changing relationship with Jesus, and until that happens, you cannot expect her to see her need of a lifestyle change. Pray that God would help you to see beyond her immoral behavior and realize her true need.
Sometimes a verbal witness is not a wise approach for some people, and that could be true for this coworker. Jesus warned us not to throw our pearls to pigs, meaning don’t try to force a witness on someone who has no respect or regard for the great value of the gospel.
I would advise you to stop trying to witness verbally. Find other ways to show God’s love to this woman. Do things for her that are extra-mile actions. Pray much for her. She knows you don’t approve of her immoral lifestyle; you don’t need to point that out. Make it your objective to allow God’s love to come through you to her. Then leave the results up to the Lord. Remember, our job is simply to sow seeds of kindness and love. The Holy Spirit is in charge of the results.
Now, this next question has probably happened to many of us. A listener wrote:
During the recent election I got into a heated argument with a coworker about abortion. I just can’t believe she thinks it’s okay to kill unborn babies. How do I convince her?
You probably will never convince her to change her views on abortion. That has to be a heart change, which only God can effect.
I often remind myself that I would be in the “feminist” camp if it weren’t for Jesus in my life. What seems so obvious to us as Christians is foolishness to those without Christ. Paul wrote: “For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God” (1 Corinthians 1:18).
In the second chapter he again says, “The person without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God but considers them foolishness, and cannot understand them because they are discerned only through the Spirit” (1 Corinthians 2:14).
It should not shock you to discover that people without God’s Spirit see nothing wrong with abortion – or other sins, for that matter. They are spiritually blind, and instead of being frustrated with them, we need to be compassionate and patient.
Begin by sincerely praying that your coworker will come to saving faith in the Lord. That is her core problem, not her beliefs on abortion.
I would back away from any further discussion on the topic. Certainly it doesn’t benefit anything to get into an argument with her about it. If she brings it up, admit that you have a strong difference of opinion but don’t allow yours...
Let’s look at some important principles to remember when you are the person giving the criticism.
First, approach it with the attitude that you are doing this to help the other person. If your motive is not for the good of the other person, you need to deal with that before you do anything else. So, begin with prayer. Ask the Lord to reveal any wrong motives to you. Make certain your concern is truly to help this person.
Second, always choose the right time and the right place. Jesus told us if we had something against someone, we should go to that person privately, one-on-one. And you need to keep in mind that to call someone into a private office and shut the door can send a very alarming and negative message to that person and others. So, maybe over lunch or in a more neutral place would be better.
Third, begin with a positive approach. Give the other person the benefit of the doubt. For example, if someone is habitually late to work, a good way to begin might be, “I’ve noticed that you’re having difficulty getting to work on time. Is there some personal problem that I need to know about?” Or in another situation you might begin, “I have heard a report of something you said, but it didn’t sound like you to me. Did you really say this?”
Then fourth, be very specific about the problem. Beating around the bush won’t do any good. I know it’s tempting for me, when I’m critiquing someone, to start to hem-haw and water it down. But if you’re doing it for the right reason, you need to be very clear about what it is and what needs to be done.
Giving and receiving criticism is a part of life. Knowing how to respond to criticism and how to give it in the right way are signs of professionalism, maturity, and most importantly, of a Christ-like spirit.
I have a gift I want to give you, a booklet we’ve prepared entitled “Giving and Receiving Criticism.” It’s packed full of good information, download booklet here.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
Have you ever asked someone to give you an honest criticism?
A very positive action on your part is to solicit criticism when appropriate. Ask for it, if you please. A sign of maturity is recognizing you don't know it all and you’re open to learn more and to change, and you want to improve. Have you ever asked your boss for some honest feedback? Have you ever said, “I realize I need to improve in this area. Can you give me some good pointers on how to do that?”
Soliciting appropriate criticism says a lot about you, and the response you receive is generally given in a positive way, much more palatable than unsolicited criticism. Instead of a criticism, it becomes a “critique.” There’s a perceived difference in a criticism and a critique. Criticisms have the feeling of finding fault, pointing fingers, condemnation. Critiques have a much more positive feeling; they are like a review or analysis for the purpose of helping.
I encourage you, when appropriate, to ask your boss or someone you respect for a critique of your work. Ask your mate for a critique of your relationship. Ask your children for a critique of your parenting skills! That may appear a little scary, but it could produce some very encouraging and enlightening conversations.
Remember that some people just don't know how to give criticism well. They may be well-intentioned, but the form it comes in can be difficult to handle. Don't let that keep you from accepting valid criticism. Separate the form from the content. Look behind poor delivery for good motives, and you may discover some very meaningful information to help you.
Proverbs 19:20 says "Listen to advice and accept instructions, and in the end you will be counted among wise.” We are the winners when we learn to solicit and accept the right kind of criticism, while at the same time refusing to dwell on the unfair and condemning ones.
Handling criticism well is a sign of spiritual and emotional maturity. How would you rate yourself when it comes to handling criticism from other people?
It’s very important that we do not let criticism send us on a guilt trip. Criticisms are either valid or invalid. When they're valid, we simply need to make the necessary changes and use them for good in our lives. When they're invalid, we need to get it out of our head and forget about it.
I find that it’s very easy to dwell on a criticism for days and days, and that can cause me to exaggerate its importance and its significance. We can allow the most insignificant criticism to throw us into a tailspin for days, can’t we?
It has taken me far too long to understand that criticism will come my way; that’s life and whether fair or not, my responsibility is to handle it in a Christ-like manner. I need to be open to honest, fair criticism and let it spur me to make needed changes in my life. And I need to recognize unfair criticism for what it is, and let it go.
When you are confident of your value to God, the more you understand your position as a believer in Jesus Christ—accepted in Christ, seated in heavenly places in Christ, secure in your relationship with God through Jesus—then you are less susceptible to the slings and arrows that others may throw at you. I’m not talking about being arrogant, but rather having a quiet confidence because you know that no person can destroy your worth, no matter what they say or do. No one can condemn you but Jesus, and he doesn’t! Romans 8:1 reminds us that “there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.”
You can truly come to the place where legitimate words of criticism are received as important insight for you, and the unfair words of criticism simply bounce off. You don’t take them into your mind and heart and you don’t allow them to contaminate your spirit.
How do you answer a criticism without sounding defensive? I’m talking about how to handle criticism, both on the receiving and the giving end.
I want to enumerate four practical steps to take to help you deal effectively in the right spirit when someone criticizes you, even if it’s not a fair criticism.
Number one, begin to pray regularly that God will give you the patience and wisdom to handle incoming criticisms appropriately. Just make that a daily prayer, and if there are specific people or situations who cause you to become defensive, pray specifically about those. This is preparing yourself in advance; it is putting on the armor of God, so that when those flaming arrows of criticism come your way, you’re not doomed to handle them in the wrong way.
Number two, don’t go into automatic defensive mode when you are criticized, even if it's unfair. Listen to it and bite your tongue if you have to, in order to avoid saying something defensive. Watch your body language and facial expressions, also. Don’t allow them to send a defensive response. Just listen. Proverbs 18:13 says, “To answer before listening—that is folly and shame.” A defensive reaction is something you will regret later on.
Number three, give yourself time before you respond. I have learned that if I react right away, it is usually the wrong reaction. But if I wait, then I can respond properly. Even a one minute delay can help you regain control, send up an emergency prayer, and respond in a much better way. So, buy yourself some time.
Number four, begin your response with positive words. This is effective whether the criticism is fair or not, whether it’s given in the right way or not. It shows self-control and maturity on your part. You might say something like, "You know, I really appreciate you sharing that with me. That gives me something to think about.”
I have a gift I want to give you, a booklet we’ve prepared entitled “Giving and Receiving Criticism.” It’s packed full of good information, download booklet here.
One thing that is tough for me to handle is criticism. How about you? But it is a necessary part of life if we're to grow and learn. I'm going to talk about criticism and how to handle it—whether you’re giving it or receiving it.
As I was putting the finishing touches on one of my Bible studies, I asked several people to critique it for me. I knew that I needed input from others if I really wanted that Bible study to be as good as it could be. But frankly, I didn't want to hear the criticisms I had solicited. And I had to fight with everything in me to keep from being defensive, as suggestions were made to improve the study.
Now, if I feel that way about solicited criticisms, you can imagine how I react to unsolicited criticisms. I can relate with Job who said, as found in the sixth chapter: "Teach me, and I will be quiet; show me where I have been wrong. How painful are honest words” (6:24).
Criticism can be either true or false, but even when we receive a true criticism, given in the right spirit, the words are honest but they are still painful. Let’s face it, our first reaction to a criticism is usually a negative reaction, right? It feels negative regardless of how it is intended. So, our first challenge is to teach ourselves how to react to criticism.
Have you been on the receiving end of some criticism lately? Maybe there’s a certain person in your life who continually criticizes you—your boss, your mother, a friend. I have to believe that your first reaction is a great deal like mine: you get defensive. It’s a normal human instinct. But when we become defensive, we usually respond in the most ineffective way.
I’ll give you some very practical ways to help you react appropriately to a criticism that comes your way, whether it was given in the right spirit or not. I have a gift I’d like to give you. We have put together a small booklet entitled “Giving and Receiving Criticism,” and it could be very helpful in learning how to understand and deal with criticism, as well as how to give it appropriately. To get your copy of this booklet, contact us through our website, or print it out from our website – or call us.
I recently shared with you about an article I read in a Christian magazine on Three Marketplace Worldviews: The secular marketplace view, the non-biblical compromised Christian view, and the biblical marketplace view. This article really caught my attention, and I want to share with you some further good information in it. If you did not catch part one, you’ll want to get a copy from our website in order to get the full picture of this topic.
A worldview is simply the way we look at things, the paradigm through which we see our world. A marketplace view is the way you look at your job, your career, your business. It’s part of your worldview, but it could be very different from other parts of your worldview. Basically, your marketplace view is the way you think about the whole issue of work and careers and your particular job. The Bible tells us that as we think in our hearts, so we are, so your marketplace view has a very strong influence on why you get up and go to work each day, how you perform once you get there, and what you hope to achieve as a result.
Let’s look at some further differences between these three marketplace views. How does a secular marketplace view understand the moral foundation and guidelines for business? Well, that view says that “The ends justify the means.” A secular view rejects the Bible as truth and considers it irrelevant to business. They would consider anyone with a biblical marketplace view as a bit weird, certainly radical.
You’ll find a wide variance of behavior among those who hold a secular marketplace view. Many are just out for themselves, using whatever means necessary to achieve their aims. They are into the office politics, the underhanded deals, the deceitful sales pitches, the tweaking of the numbers—whatever it takes to reach their goals of more money, more success, more promotions, whatever.
Others, on the other hand, will recognize that there is merit in being honest and helpful. You know, people who are not believers in Jesus Christ can still benefit greatly when they choose to live by biblical principles. I know people who would never call themselves Christians, but who also would never be dishonest in their business dealings. I read an article about a man who got a tax refund that was grossly in error. Instead of a small amount, the check was for over two million dollars. Knowing he had no right to that money, even though he had the check in his hands, he returned it because it was the right thing to do. Even a non-believer can operate out of right principles, but they still hold a secular marketplace view and are in the job to get the most they can for themselves.
Well, what is the non-biblical compromised Christian view of the moral foundation and guidelines for business? That person thinks, “God is more concerned about our church than my job or my business.” That person is not really sure the Bible has much to say about how to do business. After all, it was written too long ago. That person may think it impossible to live by Christian principles on the job because nobody else does, and it’s a dog-eat-dog world. They see their work as a separate part of their life from their walk with God.
Why is it that far-too-many Christians have this compromised view of their jobs—this unbiblical attitude toward work? Because they don’t know the Bible well-enough; because they don’t spend time truly searching God’s Word and applying it to their lives. Because they’ve never heard a message like this, challenging them to have a biblical view of their work. Because they so easily fall into the world’s mold and are not willing to pay the price of living for Jesus on their jobs. There are many reasons.
We have an enemy of our soul who is going to use every tactic possible to keep Christians from being effective witnesses for Jesus Christ, and this is certainly one weapon he uses. He deceives us into thinking incorrectly—after all,
Do you ever feel like saying, “God, I can’t hear you”? I’ve been talking about the barriers we allow to come between us and God so that we can’t hear what he wants to say to us.
If you really want to hear God speak to you, you have to know how God speaks and you must have ears that listen—a heart that really wants to hear. God speaks through his Word primarily, but also through our minds, when they are Spirit-controlled. God also speaks to us through other people.
We are admonished in Scripture to seek godly counsel, and there are times when we really need to hear someone else’s perspective, perhaps an older person, or a person who has walked with God for many years. Many years ago I became aware that a woman in my church had a wrong attitude toward some people and treated them unkindly. So, I decided it was my job to set her straight, and I told my good friend that I fully intended to confront her and get this situation fixed, if you know what I mean.
But thankfully, my friend stopped me. She said, “Mary, don’t do that. Just role model for her how a Christian woman should behave.” She told me how God had used a woman in her life when she was a new Christian to change some of her bad habits, but it came simply by watching her live a godly life. I listened to my good friend; God used her to speak to me and keep me from doing and saying something that would probably have done much harm. It’s amazing, but now, without any help from me, God is transforming that woman I was concerned about into a much more compassionate person who is more and more like Jesus.
Jesus said, “My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one can snatch them out of my hand” (John 10:27-28).
Do you ever consciously listen to the voice of Jesus? I hope you will become intentional about hearing God speak to you, because I’m absolutely certain he wants to speak to you—words of encouragement, words of peace, words of correction and conviction, but all words that are filled with his great love for you. So, ask God for ears to hear, and ask him to give you the strength and power to remove the barriers that you’ve allowed to come between you and God.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
My question for you is this: “If God wanted to speak to you today, what barrier would he have to overcome?” We’ve looked at three barriers: busyness, self-absorption, and not knowing how to listen to God. God mostly speaks to us through his written Word, so if we can’t hear God, it could be because we simply aren’t spending enough time in the Word, reading it and meditating on it.
God also speaks through our thoughts, if our thoughts are controlled by his Spirit. The good news is that when we are born from above and have been given new life in Christ, the Bible says we have the Spirit of God alive in our very bodies. With his Spirit living in us, Paul writes that we have the mind of Christ (1 Cor. 2:16). That means that I can think thoughts that are governed by God’s Spirit. He can guide me into thinking that is biblically true, and right thinking is another way God speaks to us.
For years I have prayed James 1:5, which says, “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.” I lack wisdom; I need wisdom; on my own I can make really foolish decisions. So, after praying this consistently for years, I remember one day making a decision about a matter that suddenly arose, and afterwards I thought, “That was smart; that was a good decision.” It dawned on me—well, yeah—you’ve been praying for wisdom and God gave you wisdom when you needed it.
How did I make a good decision? God spoke to me through my thoughts, which were—at least at that moment—controlled by his Spirit.
If you have trouble hearing God speak to you directly, could it be because your mind is so cluttered with the junk of the world, that your thoughts are not Spirit-controlled? We think about what we put into our minds, and often we treat our minds like they are garbage cans. We listen to any kind of trash that comes over the television or on the internet, or we read stuff that isn’t uplifting or helpful. So, when we want to hear God speak to us, he has to get through all that clutter which we’ve collected in our minds. It becomes a serious barrier between us and God.
If you want to hear God speak to you, I strongly encourage you to get serious about bringing every thought into captivity and making it obedient in Christ, as we read in 2 Corinthians 10:5.
I’ve often spoken about how to develop good listening skills, because they are essential for our success in every area of our lives..
For years I’ve been consciously working at becoming a better listener, because I’m not a naturally good listener—I’m a talker! But by putting some simple disciplines in place, I’m a better listener than I used to be. There are simple things we can all do to become better listeners, and believe me, you will reap wonderful benefits from that. People love people who listen.
But how about listening to God? Do you ever think about what you need to do to hear God’s voice? If you feel like, “God, I can’t hear you,” maybe it’s because you haven’t learned how to listen to God. In Psalm 81:13-14 we read:
If my people would but listen to me, if Israel would follow my ways, how quickly would I subdue their enemies and turn my hand against their foes!
In Psalm 85:8 the Psalmist says, “I will listen to what God the Lord says; he promises peace to his people, his faithful servants—but let them not turn to folly.”
So, listening to God is first of all a choice we make. The Psalmist said, “I will listen to what God the Lord will say.” God doesn’t usually speak to us until we have ears to hear. But how does God speak to us?
Hebrews 1:1-2: In the past God spoke to our ancestors through the prophets at many times and in various ways, but in these last days he has spoken to us by his Son, whom he appointed heir of all things, and through whom also he made the universe.
2 Timothy 3:16 – 17: All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.
Mostly God speaks to us through the written Word. That means we have to make time in our lives to read the Word for the sole purpose of hearing God speak to us personally. Sometimes I find myself reading the Bible just because I’m supposed to. That doesn’t do much good. But if you read it for the sole purpose of hearing God speak to you, God will speak to you through his Word.
If God wanted to speak to you today, what barrier would he have to overcome? When you feel that you just can’t connect with God, you can be sure of one thing: It isn’t God’s fault. He hasn’t moved. He waits with anticipation to have fellowship with you. So, when barriers come between you and God, it’s because you’ve allowed them to be there.
We talked about how the busyness of our lives is one of our main problems. Another one is that we are often just too self-absorbed. Life is all about us. Our thoughts center on us; we are the center of our world, and so God just can’t penetrate that barrier.
We’ve been led to believe that all we need to live a fulfilling life is to have good self-esteem, but what I’ve come to learn is that self is not my solution; self is my problem! True, I need to see my worth in Christ and appreciate who I am in him but striving for more good self-esteem or self-confidence just makes me self-focused, and that inevitably takes me down the wrong path.
If you want to listen to God—really hear what he wants to say to you—you have to take yourself off the throne of your heart and let God be God again. I find that almost daily I have to remember to make God the highest priority in my life; to actually go through my daily activities with the conscious awareness that it’s not all about me, it’s all about God. It’s so easy to become self-absorbed, so you have to stand guard against it all the time.
Jesus gave us principles that seem contradictory to our self-focused minds, like, if you want to save your life, you have to lose it, and if you want to be first, you have to willing to be last, and if you will humble yourself, he will exalt you. But, you see, the weird thing is that when you do it Jesus’ way—the backwards way, if you please—you discover that it works. Your burdens are lighter, your joy is greater, your peace is secure when you get yourself out of the way so that you can hear the voice of God.
If God wanted to speak to you today, would he have to break through your barrier of being so self-focused that you can’t hear him? I challenge you to determine to get through one day without talking about yourself; make a conscious effort not to think about yourself, your problems, your concerns, whatever. Just ask God to make you aware of how self-absorbed you are, and to deliver you. I think you’ll be amazed at what you discover, and you’ll also find that when God breaks through that barrier, his voice will strengthen and sustain you like nothing else.
If you’ve ever felt like you just can’t connect with God—that you can’t hear his voice—I encourage you to continue because I want to talk about what interferes with our God-connection. Let me ask you this question: If God wanted to speak to you today, what barrier would he have to overcome in order to get through to you?
The first and probably the most common barrier is that we are just too busy to hear God. Have you allowed your life to become so hectic, so over-scheduled, that you really don’t have time to listen to God? In order to hear God, you have to block out other distracting voices and sounds. That means some quiet time, some uninterrupted time, which you devote to God and hearing him talk to you. For me that is usually early morning time before the day’s activities get in the way.
Mostly God speaks through his written Word, but the way you approach reading the Bible will determine whether you really hear God or not. I begin with a prayer that God will speak to me through his Word, and then I read with the intention of hearing what God is saying to me. If my mind wanders and I realize I haven’t really been listening as I read, I just make myself start again, and discipline myself to focus on the words and meditate on what I’m reading.
I have a structured plan for reading the Bible, and when I approach that time with the attitude that I want to hear what God is saying to me today, it never fails that something pops off the page and is just what I need for that day. For example, I was reading Philippians again recently and verse 16 in chapter 3 spoke directly to me. It says, “Only let us live up to what we have already attained.”
I stopped there and began to write in my journal what God was saying to me. I’ve read that chapter many times, but that verse was new to me that day, and God spoke to me about some things I need to do to live up to what I already know. I heard God speak to me.
I urge you to set aside time to hear God through his Word, and put in writing what you hear. There is nothing more important that letting God speak to you, and he will, if you’re not too busy to listen.
My Bible study, A Guide on Getting to Know God, will help you structure a meaningful time with God each day, so you can truly hear what he wants to say to you.
I found a brief article in a Christian Professional magazine entitled “Three Marketplace Worldviews,” taken from truthnetwork.org, and I want to talk about those three marketplace worldviews.
Hopefully you realize that your worldview has a great influence on your life. If you view your world through an incorrect paradigm, it will cause you to make wrong decisions, poor choices, and lead you down wrong paths. So, it is extremely important that we scrutinize our own worldviews and make certain they are accurate. As Christians, our challenge is to make certain that we have a biblical worldview, that our attitudes and opinions and approach to life are based on sound Bible doctrine and principles. That means, of course, that we need to know the Word of God and continually study it so that we know truth which can set us free.
Over the more than 37 years that I’ve been broadcasting this program, it has become clear that far too many Christians do not have a biblical view of their jobs. That means that they often approach their work incorrectly, for the wrong reasons and with the wrong motives. That, in turn, means that a great portion of their life is spent with an unbiblical worldview, and that can only mean trouble! It interferes with your fellowship with God and with other believers, it causes a disconnect in your own spirit, and you may find yourself leading a double life, as it were: One person on your job and another person at church and with other believers.
I definitely know what I’m talking about because for ten years of my career, that’s exactly what I did. I was one person Monday through Friday and another one on Sunday. I had a totally selfish and greedy approach to my job, and soon I was swallowed up by the world’s culture and found myself operating in my job like most everyone else—out for number one and looking for personal success.
James 1:6 – 8 tells us that “one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord; such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do.” When we as true believers have a conflicting worldview that is not in agreement with God’s Word, we become double-minded, tossed back and forth like waves on the sea and unstable in all we do. Have you ever thought that your instability on your job, your inability to find the right job, or your unhappiness in the job you have could be because you have become double-minded? Your lack of a biblical marketplace view could indeed be the root cause of your struggles.
Well, let’s take a look at these three marketplace views, and as we do, ask yourself which one most represents your own view of your job or career. These three views are categorized as Secular, Non-Biblical which is described as a compromised Christian view, and Biblical.
First, what is your view of the origin and purpose of business?
The secular view is that “Business is something that man created, to serve man, and its ultimate purpose is to serve the interest of man. If there is a God, he certainly would not have any concern with business and how it is done.”
Now, admittedly, that’s how most of your non-believing friends and coworkers view their job. They are there to make as much money as possible, to achieve as much success as possible, to prove their worth, to help them realize their dreams and goals, etc., etc., etc. In other words, their view of their job is that it’s all about them, making them successful, happy, financially secure and fulfilled. They most likely have never even thought about connecting God or his principles with their job. It’s like separation of church and state; it’s almost a constitutional divide—your job and religion are two different things. That’s the secular marketplace view.
Well, what is the non-biblical compromised Christian view of the origin and purpose of business? That view says, “Work is a ‘necessary evil’ and I cannot wait until retireme...
How to cope with boredom on your job—that's Fran's dilemma. But she's learned some valuable lessons on practical things she can do when she's feeling unmotivated and bored.
Fran took some new approaches to her work and found that it put a lot of enthusiasm back into her job. She simply made some changes in her usual routine and did a few things more creatively. That has helped a great deal. It's Saturday now and she's meeting her friend, Nancy for lunch to ask her advice about being bored with her job.
They have a long discussion about boredom, and Nancy agrees that it's a challenge everybody has to face on and off throughout their careers. "No job is without its boring aspects, that's one thing I've come to accept, Fran," Nancy says.
"I'm beginning to understand that," Fran says, "but I really think that I've outgrown the job in a sense. I'm ready for a bigger challenge."
"Do you see another job in the company that interests you?" Nancy asks.
"Yes, as a matter of fact," Fran answers, "but I'm not qualified–they would never consider me...."
"Now, Fran, don't start with the negative prophecies. You need to identify your career goals and then put a plan in place to make yourself qualified," Nancy tells her.
"Well, I'd like to be ... I really think I could do a good job... I'd like my boss's job," Fran finally gets it out.
"Great..." Nancy starts to reply.
"But they'd never consider me. I haven't been there long enough..." Fran starts again.
"Stop it, Fran," Nancy says. "Let's just make a list of the qualifications necessary to do your boss's job; then we'll talk about what you can do to acquire the skills and experience you need as quickly as possible."
For about an hour the two of them make notes and discuss what Fran needs to do to be qualified for the job she wants. Then Nancy says, "If I were you, I'd go to your boss, and let him know that you want to be in line for his job when he gets promoted, and ask him to give you assignments or suggestions that will help you."
"You mean, tell him I want his job?" Fran is surprised at Nancy's suggestion.
"Sure, there's nothing wrong with that," Nancy says. As Fran goes back home she says to Jesus, "Nancy had some great advice. Thanks, Jesus, for your help.” She can feel his smile of approval and remembers another verse from Proverbs 19:20 – when you listen to advice and accept instructions, in the end you will be wise.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
Fran is unmotivated to work hard or give it her best effort because it's become routine and unchallenging–and she's bored. Her first challenge is to tackle the slippage of her work habits; that is never right for any reason. So, she's aware that she must do good work regardless of how bored she may feel.
Now, she wants to seek some advice to find out if this is just a boring period she will pass through, or if she's truly bored with her job. "I think I'll talk to my Bible study leader, Nancy," Fran decides. "She's bound to have been through this in her own career.” She gives Nancy a call and they make a date to have lunch on Saturday. But it's only Wednesday, and Saturday seems a long way off. When you're bored, time just drags, so now Fran must find a way to motivate herself through the rest of the week.
Fran asks herself, “What can I do to make myself think correctly so that these feelings of boredom don't keep me from doing good work? I need to think of a creative approach to what I’m doing now,” Fran reasons, “like doing it differently...” She begins to think about this as she looks at a proposal that needs to be done for one of her clients. "How could I do that proposal differently?” Her creative juices start to flow, and instead of doing it in the same format as she always has, Fran comes up with a new approach. She calls her friend, Andy, in the art department, and gets a little help from him, and before she knows it, she's into this project with enthusiasm.
At the end of the day, she has her proposal almost completed, but it doesn't look like any other proposal she's ever done. Her friend, Louise, walks into her office as she's finishing, and she shows her the proposal.
"Wow, Fran, that is really different," Louise says. "But I like it. Where did you get the idea?"
"If I tell you, you'll laugh, Louise," Fran says.
"Don't tell me; I know: Jesus gave it to you!" Louise laughs and rolls her eyes.
"Yep, exactly right," Fran says. "My goodness, is it time to go home already? Where did this day go?"
Sometimes we get in ruts and we don't have to be in those ruts. Try doing what you do every day with a different approach, and that will take away a lot of boredom. Just changing the schedule and routine can help.
How do you battle boredom on the job? Fran is trying to figure this out. After a few years in her job, she just feels unchallenged and—well—bored. And that is affecting her work habits, not to mention her attitude. Maybe you've had the same problem.
Last night she talked with her friend, Laura, who is a teacher, and Laura explained that on the days she feels bored, she uses a mental gear-shift technique and tells herself to act the role of a great teacher, like an actress on stage. In that way she motivates herself to do a good job of teaching even on days when she really doesn't want to.
As she arrives at work today, Fran is still thinking about Laura's mental gear-shift idea. "Wonder what I could come up with that would help me?" she thinks to herself.
Jesus reminds her of the sermon she heard recently on her thought life. “Your Pastor said you have to bring your thoughts into captivity. Maybe your mental gear-shift idea could be a good technique to help you do this. Obviously if you don't think you’re bored, you won't be, right?"
But that seems too simple to Fran. "Well, I don’t know. After all, this boredom also has something to do with the repetitiveness of the job and how long I've been doing it and the fact that I would like to try to do other things," Fran replies. "I mean, you can't just think yourself out of being bored, can you?"
“Well,” Jesus says, “maybe yes, maybe no, but don’t you think you need to address the immediate problem of your deteriorating work habits?”
“You’re right, Lord,” she responds. “I know I have to give it my best whether I’m bored or not. So, my first challenge is to not let these feelings of boredom cause me to give less than my best effort here on my job," Fran says.
“Why don’t you seek some good advice?” Jesus prompts her. She remembers that familiar verse in Proverbs 13:10, which says that “wisdom is found in those who take advice.”
"Good idea. I'll do that," Fran agrees.
Our friend Fran is finding it a little difficult to go to work because she's feeling very bored and unchallenged. Did you ever have that problem? I sure have. Jesus has made Fran aware that boredom can lead to some sloppy work habits.
The day finally ends and Fran heads home. After dinner the phone rings and it's her friend Laura, who is a teacher. They chat for a minute and Fran says to her, "Laura, you've been teaching for eight or nine years, right? Do you ever just get tired of teaching–you know, just plain bored?"
"Yeah, sure," Laura says. "Lots of days."
"You do? But why do you stay in teaching if you're bored with it?" Fran asks.
"Oh, Fran, I've learned to distinguish between boring days and periods and being bored with my job. You see, I really believe God has called me to teach and I believe I can have a godly impact in the lives of my students. But that doesn't mean I don't feel bored sometimes," Laura explains.
"Well," Fran replies, "how can you do a good job teaching when you feel bored?"
"The key word there, Fran, is 'feel.' I feel bored but I can't let my feelings control my actions. As long as I take the paycheck that comes with the job, I owe these students the best teacher I can be," Laura answers.
Fran feels convicted as she listens to Laura. "You're right, Laura, I know, but lately I've just been so bored with my job that I simply haven't worked very hard. I know I'm not doing my best work–and Jesus knows it, too."
"That's a lousy feeling, isn't it?" Laura agrees. "I know; I've been there."
"Well, how do you make yourself do a good job even when you're bored?" Fran asks, sincerely wanting some help with her problem.
"Fran, this is going to sound crazy, but I just talk to myself and say, 'Now, Laura, today you are not a teacher, you are an actress. And you must play the most convincing role ever–you must act like a great teacher today.' I go into a mental gear-shift and I see myself as an actress on a stage who must play the role of a teacher. Does that make any sense to you, Fran?" Laura asks.
"Yeah, kinda," Fran muses. "A mental gear-shift, huh?"
"Well, it's just my way of getting myself out of that boredom rut," Laura says. "Then I discover that the boredom usually goes away pretty fast once I begin my acting role.” Laura laughs.
As Fran crawls into bed that night, she prays, "Lord, will you please give me a mental gear-shift like Laura has, so I don't succumb to boredom. Thanks, Lord," and with that she goes to sleep.
Do you ever get bored with your job? Boredom is a common problem we all face. Our friend Fran is dealing with boredom on her job. In case you're not familiar with this series, this is a fictional story of a woman who is learning to practice the presence of Jesus on her job.
It's Tuesday afternoon, and Fran is sitting at her desk looking at the clock. "Three o'clock; wow, has this been a long day. I am ready to go home–in fact, I'm ready for the weekend, and it's only Tuesday. How am I going to make it to Friday?" she says out loud to herself.
She realizes that she hasn’t had much energy in the past few days, and she feels a bit guilty, but she can rationalize it to herself. "I'm just tired of the same old routine, you know,” she tells herself. “I guess I'm ready for a new job. I think I've got this one down pat and there's no challenge in it for me."
That quiet voice of Jesus says to her, "So, you feel you've done all you can do with this job? No new ground to break, no room for improvement?” Coming to understand that Jesus is aware of her every word and thought still catches her by surprise at times, but as she is learning to practice the presence of Jesus, she is more and more aware of his reaction to her words and thoughts.
She responds, "Well, I guess there's always room for improvement, but I've been here a few years now and yeah—I think I'm ready for bigger things."
Jesus says, “Have you noticed your attitude in the last few days and weeks? Can you see that your work habits have deteriorated a bit, maybe because of your attitude?” That’s a little hard for Fran to own up to quite yet. She says, "I don't think I've been that bad. I'm still getting my work done."
“Yes,” Jesus says, “but are you working with excellence – are you doing it with all your might?” Jesus reminds her of a familiar verse from Ecclesiastes 9:10.
Fran says, "Lord, I do more work on a bad day than most of my coworkers do on a good day.” Jesus replies, "So, by comparing yourself with others, you can justify your lack of doing your best, is that what you're telling me, Fran?"
Fran is not sure how to answer him, so she shifts in her seat and starts to shuffle papers.
Boredom. It can certainly lead to some poor work habits and keep us from being our best, can't it?
I began this devotional on broken dreams because I know that all of us have to find our way back from the death of dream at some point in our lives. Well, maybe I should say we all need to find our way back, but sadly, some never do. Some get detoured into bitterness and hopelessness and anger, and then they end up suffering twice: Once from the broken dream and secondly from despair.
If you missed part one, you’ll find a copy on our website – christianworkingwoman.org. I believe you'll find it helpful. It may be that you know someone who needs some help on his or her journey back from a broken dream, and you can pass it on to that person.
Briefly, in part one, I shared that quite a few years ago I found myself on this road back, struggling with the aftermath of a dead dream, and I kept a journal of those painful days. As I've re-read those journal entries, I've discovered a pattern of sorts—a series of stages and decisions that we face on this road back from brokenness. Regardless of what your particular broken dream is, I think we all encounter similar roadblocks and detours on the road back. So, I began describing what you can expect.
First, you must let go of the dream and give God control. You have to face the fact that the dream is dead—at least for the time being—and nothing you can do is going to revive it. I found this to be an important first step—to admit that I had failed miserably in making my dream come true. Coming to the end of my rope was the thing that finally convinced me to let go of the controls of my life and allow God to be in charge.
Let me encourage you not to prolong this first step, thinking there’s something more you can do. Don’t be afraid to give God permission to be in charge. Believe it or not, he can do a better job than you have been trying to do. Please, if you haven't yet, take this first step on the road back: Let go of the dream and give God control.
Secondly, we come face to face with the stark reality that we cannot avoid the pain of a broken dream. We cannot stuff it or ignore it or skip it. We must embrace the pain, accept the suffering that is ours and allow God to use that pain to bring good out of this broken dream.
We talked about those two stages on the road back from brokenness in more detail in part one. Let me continue now, as I share with you from my own experience.
Don't Give Up!
Sometimes I felt like this journey back was a roller-coaster ride. For example, there were moments when I seemed to have a grip. Early on I wrote:
I want to learn that God is enough. Even if he doesn't give me what my emotions say I need, I will trust him. I want to learn to love him more than anyone or anything else.
But there were other days when I really wanted to quit. Not long after that encouraging entry, where I seemed to be making progress, I wrote:
In a sense the days get harder. I wonder and worry and fear. The impact of the loss is more obvious. The temptation to call it quits is ever-present. Now, I'm learning to walk by faith. There is nothing good on the horizon. Everything looks bleak. I don't feel God's presence.
One of the surprises on this journey back was that I had to make daily, sometimes hourly, sometimes momentary decisions to stay on the road. I can't begin to count the number of times I came so close to giving up and going back into "control mode.” At various points in many days, I had to reconfirm my initial decision to let go and let God.
My faith was small, but it was growing. The phrase that I heard God say to me in that still small voice inside my head was: "Can't you trust me?” At each of these subsequent decision points, as I would be ready to quit the fight, that question would ring in my head: "Can't you trust me?” It was the beginning of learning that the most important thing I can ever do for God is to demonstrate to him that I trust him.
Are you in that place today where you've let go of the dream but the pain seems to ...
I'd like to ask you a question: What do you think is the most effective tool our enemy Satan uses against the followers of Jesus Christ? He sure has lots of them, and he comes at us from every direction, but certainly one of, if not the most potent weapon he uses, is discouragement. I'd like to share a short piece with you entitled "The Devil's Best Tool."
"It was once announced that the devil was going out of business and would offer all his tools for sale, to whoever would pay his price.
"On the night of the sale they were all attractively displayed, and a bad looking lot they were. Malice, hatred, envy, jealousy, sensuality, and deceit, and all the other implements of evil were spread out, each marked with its own price.
"Apart from the rest lay a harmless looking wedge-shaped tool, much worn and priced higher than any of the others. Someone asked the devil what it was. 'That's discouragement,' was the reply. 'Well, why do you have it priced so high?' 'Because,' replied the devil, 'it is more useful to me than any of the others. I can pry open and get inside a person's consciousness with that when I could not get near her or him with any of the others, and when once inside, I can use that person in whatever way suits me best. It is so much worn because I use it with nearly everybody, since few people yet know it belongs to me.'
"It hardly needs to be added that the devil's price for discouragement was so high that it was never sold. He still owns it and is still using it.
"Is he using it on you? Do not be his next victim. Encourage yourself in the Lord."
Obviously this is a fairy-tale, but it drives home an important truth. Many of us are defeated continually because we get discouraged so easily. If you're discouraged today, realize that Satan has used this tool on you again. Pray and ask God to deliver you from discouragement. Stand against the enemy and claim victory in prayer. Encouragement is listed in Romans 12:8 as one of the gifts given to the body of Christ; we need more encouragers. Maybe that's a gift we should all pray for.
Be an encourager today. If you are, you will defeat the plans of Satan in your life, and you will bring glory to Jesus.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
Have you ever realized that the practice of comparing yourself to others will easily lead you into the sin of envy and jealousy? Jesus taught Peter this important lesson of not comparing himself with others, and we can learn from Peter.
You remember when Jesus told Peter that he had plans to use him mightily, but also informed him that he would be required to suffer for the Lord. He prophesied that Peter would die a difficult death in order that God would be glorified.
Peter's first reaction was to compare himself to John, and he asked Jesus, "What about him?” Jesus answered, "If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me?" (John 21:21b-22).
How often do we do the same thing? When things are tough for us, we tend to think, "Well, what about John? John's no better than me. Don't I deserve a break today, Lord?"
What we have to recognize is that God is sovereign and he does as he pleases. It is his prerogative to lead each of us in whatever paths he chooses. When we start looking at others and thinking they've got it easy and we've got it hard, then we're in for trouble. That is envy; that is lack of trust; that is sin.
When I find myself falling into this pattern of wondering why I can't have things as easy as others, I try to immediately remember what Jesus said to Peter, and I say to myself: "What is that to you, Mary? It's none of your business how God chooses to treat other people. Your job is simply to obey the Lord so that he will be glorified in your life.”
Let's agree that by God's grace we'll stop this very harmful practice of comparing ourselves, and learn to be thankful for who we are and how God has blessed us. It is a truth that will set us free, free to be all that God has planned for us to be instead of being crippled by the sinful practice of comparing ourselves to others.
Have you ever thought about the consequences of comparing yourself to people that you think are better than you are? The parable of the talents gives us clear indication of just how dangerous it is to do that.
You remember in this parable that the third servant was given only one talent, and he decided not to try to do anything with it. After all, compared to what the others had, what could he do with one measly talent? But notice what happened to this third servant as a result of his attitude—of comparing himself to those who had more:
First, we notice that it made him fearful. He was afraid to lose the talent he had, since he compared and saw that he had only one. Knowing that the master was demanding and expected him to multiply his talents, he decided to dig a hole and hide it. That fear led him to a very irrational, unreasonable course of action. Second, he became lazy. The master called him a lazy servant. When we compare ourselves to others who have more than we do, this will frequently happen. We lose our motivation, we lose our initiative, and we become lazy. Third, it led him into sin. The master identified him as wicked, because he had failed to do what he knew he should do. In James 4:17 we read: "If anyone, then, knows the good they ought to do and doesn’t do it, it is sin for them." Fourth, he lost what he had. His worst fear was realized; the master took his one talent and gave it to the man with ten. Fifth, he lost his reward. Had he multiplied his one talent into two, had he been as good a steward of what he had as the others, he would have received the same reward as the others. But he lost his reward because he compared himself to those who had more, and that made him fearful and lazy.
The consequences of comparing ourselves to others who we think are better than us, or have more than we do are incredibly devastating. Could it be that you've been doing that lately and you're living with some of these consequences now? Ask God to deliver you and determine to bring your thoughts into captivity and not compare yourself to others.
We're looking at the three consequences of comparing ourselves to other people. Sometimes we can compare ourselves and think we're better than others. I want to look at the dangers of comparing ourselves with people that we think are better than us.
Consider the parable of the talents as Jesus told it. Before leaving on a long trip, the master gives three servants certain talents, or resources. One servant received five talents, one two, and the third servant received only one talent.
When the master returned, he asked each of them to give an account of what they had done with those resources. The first servant reported that his five talents was now ten; the second servant similarly reported that his two talents were now four. But what about the third servant? He had taken his one talent and done nothing with it, and he had to report to the master that because he was afraid of losing it, he had hidden it and it was still only one.
The master rewards the first two servants equally: "Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master's happiness” (Matthew 25:21). Even though one had ten and one had only four, they got the same exact reward.
But what does the master say to the third servant? It's a very strong condemnation: "You wicked, lazy servant!...Take the talent from him and give it to the one who has ten talents!” (Matthew 25:26-28).
The lesson here is that God does not compare us with others, but he does expect us to make very good use of the resources that have been given to us. This servant could have had the same reward that the others received had he simply taken his one talent and used it. He wasn't required to multiply his one into ten, only into two.
Are you failing to use what God has given you? Do you compare yourself to others and conclude that they are better than you, they have more to work with than you do, they've got it easy and you've got it hard? Whether you have more or less than other people is inconsequential. You will be required to account for your own resources, no one else's.
Do you often compare yourself to other people? Have you thought of the consequences of doing that? We’re going to look at some people in the Bible who compared themselves to others, and hopefully learn from their mistakes.
It's very easy for any of us to fall into a trap of comparing ourselves to other people. But the consequences can be devastating, and sinful as well.
Usually when we compare ourselves to others we come to one of three conclusions:
We're better than they are. They're better than we are. We'd rather be them than us.
You remember the parable of the Pharisee and the tax collector, where the Pharisee thought he was better than everyone else, particularly the sinful tax collector, because he compared his outward appearance to others and concluded he was a truly good guy. The tax collector on the other hand recognized his need and asked God for mercy. Jesus said that God heard the prayer of the tax collector, but not the prayer of the Pharisee.
How frequently, like the Pharisee, we compare outward appearances and end up thinking we're pretty hot stuff. Do you tend to look at others and think: "Well, I look better than she does," or "I perform better than he does," or "I've got more to offer than they do.” When you make these kinds of comparisons, the sin of pride is taking over your mind.
What I find particularly prevalent among business people is that we compare our positions and our salaries, and think we're more important than others because we've climbed the ladder higher or gotten another raise. Remember that in eternity those titles and salaries will have no meaning. For a Christian they should simply be viewed as resources to be used by God. If you're in that very typical but sinful practice of comparing your status to others and judging worth based on position, please read carefully Philippians 2 and 1 Corinthians 4:6-7. They will give you God's perspective.
Have you ever been on that road back from a broken dream? Most of us have. Perhaps it was a relationship that failed. You had such high hopes; it looked as though you had found the one you had hoped for so long—and then, it fell apart. Or was it that the longed-for relationship never happened, and you're on that road back from giving up on that dream?
No doubt many of you are—or have been—on the road back from a broken marriage. How sad are the statistics of our society: so many marriages break up. Life looks dismal as you walk on the road back from that broken dream. There are ruins all around you—so many plans now forsaken; so many promises broken; so many lives harmed.
Broken dreams come in many shapes and sizes:
The promotion you thought for sure you had, and someone else got it. The business venture that you put all your savings into, and it failed. The education you dreamed of for so long that wasn't possible. The house you made a bid on, and didn't get. The book you wrote, and couldn't get published.
The list is virtually endless. Some broken dreams are more devastating than others, but each time the results are very similar. We have to make the journey back from our broken dream, and it's so hard to put one foot in front of the other. It seems so useless to even start down that road, because you're convinced you'll never make it back.
Ever been on the road back from a broken dream? My guess is you have. In fact, you may be there right now. I know what it's like; I've been there. I want to talk about the journey back from a broken dream because I want you to know there is hope and there are good days ahead.
What I've discovered is that on the road back from a broken dream, there are opportunities for growth like no other time in our lives. That is when we are most likely to look up; to recognize our weakness and inadequacy; to pay attention to what God has to say to us. It can be the most significant time in your life for developing spiritual muscle, for growing in grace, for strengthening your faith.
But I've also noticed that it's possible to miss all that God has for you on this rough road. You see, you have a choice as you journey back from a broken dream. You can accept it and grow from it, and eventually you'll make it back. You'll discover there is indeed light at the end of that tunnel. Or you can choose to take one of many detours on this road back from a broken dream and end up in bitterness, anger and despair. It's your choice.
I want to encourage you to stay on the right road; to share with you some of the lessons God taught me; to let you know that the Lord will walk with you every step of the way and bring you back to hope and joy and life again. Paul wrote to the Galatians 3:4:
Did you suffer so many things in vain—if indeed it was in vain?
And I would begin by urging you not to let the suffering and pain of a broken dream be for naught in your life. You've already experienced terrible disappointment and suffered a great deal because of your broken dream. Will it be for nothing? I hope not.
I journaled my way through an eighteen-month period in my life quite a few years ago now, as I made the journey from brokenness to acceptance to, and at last, victory. In retrospect as I re-read those journal entries, I discovered a pattern of sorts—steps and stages that I went through on that road back. There were setbacks and failures, but gradually, day by day, God brought me to a place where I was no longer obsessed by that broken dream and the pain began to turn to joy. So, I'd like to share with you some of the stages and experiences and feelings you can expect on your road back from your broken dream, so that your hope is renewed.
Letting Go of the Dream
For ten years I pursued my dream, determined to find what I thought would make me happy. But when I came to the end of my rope, I knew I had to make a decision: Would I continue this fruitless pursuit o...
Are you looking for an easy way to change? I'm not sure I can offer you an easy way to change, but I would like to offer you a chart for change—a simple idea that you may find helpful in getting into gear when it comes to making some changes in your life.
I've found that where discipline is required, I often need some structure to help me put that discipline in place. So, I've designed a Chart for Change to help all of us replace some bad habits with some good ones.
This Chart for Change will first of all help you to define the changes you want to make in your life. Perhaps it's a change in your communications skills-listening better, choosing your words more carefully, working at your non-verbal skills. Maybe it's a change in your attitude that you need to work on. It could be a change in your eating habits, or incorporating exercise into your lifestyle. Lots of us have a desire to pray more and be better Bible students. So, first you’ll want to designate some specific changes you'd like to make.
Then this Chart for Change will help you prioritize those changes. It's a mistake to tackle too much at one time. So I recommend that you work on one or two at a time. Choose the change that is most needed, which will have the most impact in your life.
Once you've chosen which change to tackle first, then you need to set a goal and determine a technique to use to make that change happen. Change takes times and you must get through that uncomfortable transition from a bad habit to a good one. So, you need to set a realistic time goal and come up with a helpful tool that you can use to make the change happen.
For example, if you're trying to improve your eating habits, find a friend who'll work with you; who'll call to see how you're doing; perhaps someone who wants to do the same thing. That kind of accountability will help you get through the transition of change.
Then, most importantly, this Chart for Change will help you to focus on the spiritual component. Recognizing that you can do all things through Christ, not on your own, it is critical that you depend on the power of God's Word and his Holy Spirit to make change happen. So, this Chart I've designed will help you pray more effectively about needed changes as well as recognize your constant need for the power of God to help you change.
If you think this Chart for Change would be helpful to you, you’ll find it available right now on our website—christianworkingwoman.org.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
I'd like to ask you a question: Why is it you haven't changed those things about yourself which you know need changing? You say, "I've tried, but I just can't do it!"
Good! That's exactly where you need to start. Recognize you can't do it on your own. All of us have stories to tell about trying so hard to change some bad habit; making a New Year's resolution to start a good habit; promising ourselves and God we're going to change. Only to wake up a few days or weeks later and have to confess, it didn't last; it didn't work.
In order to change, we first have to realize we can't do it. Sounds like a contradiction, but it's the truth. Paul wrote to the Corinthians that it's only when we see how weak we are that we can be strong. So often I become discouraged with my inability to change, and I just say, "Lord, I want to change but I can't. I think it's impossible for me, Lord.” And when I finally give up, I think I can see the smile on his face, and hear him say, "I've been waiting for you to realize you'll never make it on your own."
For me this is a continual lesson. My nature and personality is to take charge and do it myself. It never dawns on me that I can't do something, so in my own energy and self-determination, I make valiant efforts and discover I cannot change myself. When I finally give up, then I come back to that verse in Philippians 4:13 which says, "I can do all things through him (Christ) who strengthens me.”
Today's humanistic philosophy tells us we can do and be anything we want to. "I can do all things..." - that's what the world system wants you to believe. But it's a lie. You cannot do all things, but you can do all the things that God created you to do—all the good works he ordained for you before you were born. You can do all those things, but only through Christ who gives you the strength. When you realize you can't, and you go to Jesus daily for strength because you know you can't do it, then the miracles start to happen.
Maybe today you need to begin the change process by admitting that you can't. No need pretending with the Lord, anyway; so, tell him what he already knows: You can't change. But ask him to change you through his strength.
And then be willing to put the discipline in place that change requires. If you will do that, you're in for some neat surprises. Maybe the discipline is the hard part for you. Well, I've found that sometimes it's very helpful to impose some disciplines in my life that will help me change, and I'd like to offer you a Chart for Change which I've designed.
In order to get to heaven, you have to change. That's what Jesus said in Matthew 18:3: "Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.”
Change requires admitting you're wrong, and many people just refuse to humble themselves and say, "I need to change.” It's that old serpent pride which gets into our minds and hearts, and we rebel against any change because we refuse to admit we need to change.
In one of my business seminars a manager told me that one of her employees had a very abrupt tone of voice which sounded rude to customers. When she confronted her with the need to change her tone of voice, her employee was very defensive. She said, "My mother's been telling me that all my life, but I'm not going to change the way I talk. That's the way I am, and you're asking me to be someone phony.” So, she refused to take either her mother's or her manager's advice; she chose to be the way she is rather than admit she needed to change.
Now, don't we all have to admit we've done something similar. You see, changing is humbling. Anyone who is working at changing themselves is admitting they have room for improvement, and that takes humility. In that next verse, Matthew 18:4, Jesus goes on to say, "Whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.”
This is one key reason people don't change. When Jesus told those people they had to change and become like children—humble themselves—not too many of them were willing to do that. Most people reject Jesus because they're not willing to admit they have a need to change.
How about in your life? Is some stupid pride keeping you from saying, "You know, that's an area where I really need to change. By God's grace, I'm going to change for the better"? If pride is the problem, will you today ask God to forgive you and give you a heart that's willing to change?
In 2 Corinthians 3:18 we read that we are being transformed into the likeness of Jesus Christ with ever increasing glory. Transformation is change. It's exciting to think that we can be changed into the likeness of Jesus; I don't want to miss that transformation, how about you? But remember, in order to become more and more like Jesus, we have to change.
One of my favorite characteristics of God is that he never changes. Isn't it wonderful to know he'll be the same way he's always been? Don't you look forward to that day when we'll be like Jesus and have no need to change? Well, that will be something, but until then, change is something we need to do.
One of the main reasons we never change those bad habits or put those good new ones in our lives is that we forget. When you start to change anything about yourself, you need reminders around you because during the transition period, you won't remember. So, you need memory joggers. I call them gimmicks. Gimmicks to help you remember to change.
For instance, in my business training I encouraged people to put a mirror on their desk at work near their telephone, where they would have to look at themselves frequently. How you look is how you sound, so that mirror becomes a dramatic reminder that you need to smile more when you're talking on the phone, so you'll sound better. That mirror is a gimmick. Helps you remember.
Now, think about what you want to change about yourself. If you will come up with a gimmick to help you remember, and put that gimmick into your everyday life, you'll be surprised how it helps you change. Maybe it's something as simple as a sign you put in front of you. Maybe you ask other people to remind you. Perhaps you establish a little ritual of reading something at the beginning of each day which reminds you to change.
A man once told me that he wrote a message on his bathroom mirror each night using an erasable magic marker. That message is intended to remind him each morning to start his day in a positive mode. Well, that's a great gimmick. You and I could write a verse of scripture or something encouraging to remind us that we're working on making a good change happen in our lives.
Satan loves to work at making us remember what we should forget and forget what we should remember. Help your memory along, make it easier to change by devising some gimmicks that work for you. Paul said, "I can do all things through Christ...” You can change through Jesus if you'll work at it.
They tell us it takes 21 days to break an old habit, and 65 days to establish a new one! Wow, change comes hard and slow for us, doesn't it?
Think about it: What are the things in yourself which you keep intending or trying to change, but it just hasn't happened yet? You're going to be more organized; you're going to eat better; you're going to start exercising regularly; you're going to read your Bible and pray more. Lots of us have many good intentions about making changes in our lives, but too often those intentions are never realized. Why?
Well, for one thing, change is very uncomfortable. We have dug ourselves some little ruts in which we operate. Those ruts frequently are bad habits that need to be replaced, but we've been there so long that we're comfortable there. As soon as you start to change anything, you go into a transition period which is anything but comfortable.
But think about it: We can never improve without changing, so unless you're willing to stagnate where you are, you must learn how to incorporate change into your life in little and big ways. And there are many skills and disciplines and good habits that we can only learn by teaching ourselves to change.
For example, if you wanted to become a better listener, you would have to change some of your bad listening habits and replace them with good ones. Maybe you tend to interrupt others often. To change that bad habit, you would have to consciously work at not interrupting. It wouldn't happen overnight, but you certainly could become a better listener if you were willing to change.
Remember, when we decide to change a bad habit, at first it's very uncomfortable, and our natural tendency is to go back into our old ruts. I want to encourage you not to let the uncomfortableness of change keep you from changing. Live through the uncomfortable feelings, but don't give up.
Paul said, "I can do all things through him (Christ) who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:13). Not by yourself, but through Christ you can change, if you're prepared to live through the transition period, get used to the new territory, and not allow those uncomfortable feelings to keep you from changing.
The challenge of setting reasonable boundaries is almost always a relationship challenge. And it frequently comes from our misplaced idea of what it means to be a good friend, or what it means to be a good team player. There’s no doubt that as Christ-followers, our standard given to us by Jesus himself is to go the extra mile, to do more than is required of us. We are called to be servants, as Jesus was, and that should always be our attitude.
But when you try to do more than you should do and you think that going the extra mile means you jump through everyone’s hoops and meet everyone’s expectations, you are then in dangerous territory. This is how you become burned out; it’s how you become an enabler; it’s how you allow false guilt to drive you into exhaustion and resentment.
I would remind you that Jesus knew how to say no. Do you remember when the disciples were looking for Jesus one morning because a crowd of people had gathered to hear Jesus again, and no doubt were eager to take advantage of his gift of healing? They found him alone, praying, and they exclaimed: “Everyone is looking for you!” Jesus replied, “Let us go somewhere else—to the nearby villages—so I can preach there also. That is why I have come” (Mark 1: 37b-38). The disciples tried to tell Jesus that he should come back and preach to the crowd waiting for him, but Jesus knew when to say no.
Another time a man stopped him and asked him to settle a disagreement. He said, “Teacher, tell my brother to divide the inheritance with me.” But Jesus said to him, “Man, who appointed me a judge or an arbiter between you?” (Luke 12:13-14). Basically Jesus said, “Sorry, that’s not my job.” He drew a boundary and said no, even though he could have done it but it was not what he was sent to do.
Jesus knew that he could not please everyone; in his human body while here on earth he had physical limitations, as we do. He became weary, as we do. He needed rest and time alone, as we do. And in order to do what God had sent him to do, he had to refuse to do other things—he had to draw boundaries. I believe his example teaches us that we must also learn to draw reasonable boundaries in order for us to be able to do what God wants us to do.
So, let’s see what other boundary issues Fran is facing now. It’s Wednesday of this week in her life, and she has just barely made a deadline for her most important client, but it was at the expense of late hours last night because she allowed a coworker to talk her into helping her for “ten minutes,” which turned into three hours. This is one of the boundary issues she faces. Fran is relieved that she got it done, but quite honestly, she is exhausted and sleepy.
With two hours to go before the end of the day, she is counting the minutes until she can leave, tying up a few loose ends, and dreaming of going to bed early when the kids do tonight. But in walks her manager, who says,
“Fran, if you’re not busy tonight, I’d love for you to join me for dinner with the Vice President of Marketing, who is in town this week, you know. I’ve been telling him about your success and how much you’ve contributed to the fact that we’re twenty percent ahead of our quota, and he asked if you would join us. I know you have your kids, but if you could get a sitter, I’d be glad to cover that expense for you.”
Don’t do it, Fran, the inner voice of God’s Spirit seems to say to her, but how can she say no? I mean, how often do you get this kind of opportunity to make a good impression? Well, she thinks, I can do it. Mom will keep the kids for me, I think, and it’s just one night. So, she hears herself saying, “That’s very nice of him. I, uh, I think I can make that happen. Let me make a call and I’ll get back to you.”
She calls her mom, who does have plans for that evening, but Fran twists her arm and convinces her that her Dad will be glad to watch the kids while she’s away, so of course, Mom can’t say no either,
In his marvelous book, Knowing God, J. I. Packer says that many church people "pay lip-service to the idea of grace, but there they stop. Their conception of grace is not so much debased as non-existent” (p. 116-117).
We’ve been talking about what it means to live a grace-full life, to truly understand God’s grace to us, which equips us to dispense grace to others. I find that I must be intentional about living a grace-full life – I have to think about it, pray about, and make choices each day that lead me to be a grace-full person.
We’ve looked at the ABCs of graceful living this week:
A – Abound in generosity, in good works.
B – Live a bitter-less life. We must pull up those weeds of bitterness as soon as they start to grow,
because bitterness chokes grace out of our lives.
C - Learn to be content. Contentment is a trademark of a grace-full life.
This is a good description of grace-full living, though not exhaustive. But where do we get this grace? We can’t find it in ourselves; we can’t obtain it through good works or trying harder.
Hebrews 4:16 says: “Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” We find grace at the throne of God, which is a throne of grace. God is enthroned in grace. And the incredibly good news is that we can approach the throne of grace with confidence. We can be absolutely confident that we will be accepted there if we go in the righteousness of Jesus Christ. And we can be absolutely confident that grace will be given to us to help us.
Maybe, like me, you are not a terribly graceful person, but would you like to be a grace-full person—full of God’s grace which you can give to others? It is available to any who will be intentional about living in the ABCs of God’s grace and making regular visits to the throne of grace.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
We’re looking at the ABC’s of grace-full living, what it looks like to be a truly graceful person and then how we can become grace dispensers. As we have seen, A is abundant living, B is bitter-less living, and now we look at C.
C- Contented
Grace-full living is contented living. The dictionary says that a contented person is one who is
satisfied with what they are and what they have; they want nothing more or anything else.
Does that describe you? I have to tell you that there are far too many days it does not describe me. I see a new house being built, and I think how nice it would be to have it. I peruse those catalogs that flood my mailbox and I can convince myself that I can’t live without something I saw in the catalog.
And we can lose our contentment by wishing we were a different person, with a different life, in a different place, having different gifts and abilities. Ever go there?
Living a discontented life will suck the grace of God right out of you. It will cause you to be restless, self-focused, resentful, envious.
Hebrews 13:5 says: “Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have because God has said, ‘Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.’”
This is something we must become intentional about doing. We have to work at it, if you please. We have to pray it into our lives. It doesn’t just happen.
The enemy of your soul will trip you up with discontent if you give him the opportunity. He knows that a discontented Christian is not going to dispense grace. So, he whispers those lies to you, convincing you that your life cannot be complete or full or good unless you have something or someone that you don’t now have.
But we can learn contentment. The Apostle Paul wrote: “I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want” (Philippians 4:12b).
Contented living is freedom – and it is grace-full living.
What does it mean to live a life that is full of God’s grace—to be Grace Dispensers. We’re looking at the ABC’s of graceful living, and yesterday we saw that A is Abundant living. The abundance Jesus came to give us is abundant joy and peace, and that should overflow into abundant good works—dispensing grace to others.
B- Bitter-less
Grace-full living is living without bitterness. Consider this passage from Hebrews:
See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many. Hebrews 12:15
Allowing bitter roots to grow in your heart will cause you to miss the grace-full life. There are many bitter roots that can become ingrained in the garden of our hearts. Consider these:
The bitter root of rejection
It’s very easy to allow the pain of rejection to take root in your heart and bloom into bitterness.
The bitter root of unfulfilled dreams
Unfulfilled dreams create a fertile ground for bitter roots.
The bitter root of loss
What have you lost lately? Your job? Your pride? Has death robbed you of a loved one? Or divorce? Loss makes us vulnerable to bitterness.
This verse teaches us several things about bitter roots:
First, they grow. You can't hold onto one little bitter twig. It won't stay that size. It always grows.
Second, they cause trouble. Any little bitterness will cause you trouble. A great many of the emotional and mental breakdowns we see today have their beginnings in bitterness that was never dealt with.
Third, they defile many. Bitterness spills over to everyone around you. As parents we can transfer that bitter spirit to our children; as managers and employees we can transfer it to our co-workers. It is a poison that affects everyone it touches.
If you’re struggling with some bitterness today, I pray you will ask God to help you dig up those bitter roots so that you can enjoy the grace-full life that Jesus came to give you and you will be able to dispense grace to others.
We’re talking about how to become a grace-full person. The song, Amazing Grace, is sung all over the world by people who have no understanding of its message of salvation through Jesus. But the idea of grace appeals to everyone.
But what does it mean for you and me in our world today to live grace-full lives? What does that look like? I’d like to give you the ABC’s of grace-full living. Here is “A”
A- Abundant
Jesus said: “I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full” (John 10:10b). Jesus wasn’t talking about being full of money, or earthly success, or freedom from problems. He was talking about a life that is grace-full!
In 2 Corinthians 9:8 we read: “And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that having all sufficiency in all things at all times, you may abound in every good work.” When the grace of God fills us, then it must flow out to others in the form of good works. What good works? The good works that you were created to do. Ephesians 2:10 says “We are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”
Here are a few examples of how we dispense grace to others:
Someone is sick; you minister to their needs. Someone is rejoicing over good news; you rejoice with them. Someone has a broken heart; you cry with them, listen to them, sit with them, console them. Someone is wandering away from God; you confront them in love, admonish them, help them to come back into fellowship. Someone is lost in sin, without Christ; you share the gospel in every way you can, lovingly planting seeds of truth in their life. Someone needs financial help; you give out of love and concern. You teach the Word of God in a small group; you organize prayer for your company; you begin a Bible study at work or at home; you invite others to hear the Word of God.
These are just a few ways that we become Grace Dispensers to others, abounding in good works.
I can testify to you from personal experience that grace-full living is knowing that God is using you in the lives of others. There is nothing more fulfilling than that.
I have to admit that I am not a graceful person. In my first year of college, during Christmas break, my mother lined me up for private lessons with a woman who coached me on how to be graceful. Now, for my mother to spend money on such lessons was an indication of how much help I needed! I was not then—still am not to this day—graceful.
But I’m happy to report to you that though I may never be graceful, I can be grace-full—full of grace. That is not contingent on my agility or nimbleness or any physical attributes. It is, instead, contingent on my openness to the grace of God and my willingness to let it fill my life.
In writing of our Savior, John says, “The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth” (John 1:14). Jesus was full of grace. As believers in Jesus Christ, you and I are in the process of being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory. We are to be filled with his Spirit, and therefore, we have the incredible opportunity to be filled with grace. Like Jesus, we can be full of grace.
When asked what was the one thing about Christianity that sets it apart from all other religions, C. S. Lewis responded, “Oh, that’s easy. It’s grace.” No other religion offers God’s love and redemption coming to us free of charge, as a gift, no strings attached, no performance required, no standards to meet. Only Christianity dares to make God’s love unconditional. That’s because Christianity has the only qualified Savior, Jesus Christ.
I want to encourage you to become very intentional about becoming a woman—or a man—who is grace-full; full of God’s grace. It must become more than a cliché, more than words we say or songs we sing. God’s grace needs to permeate every corner of our being so that we are living examples of his grace.
And then, when we are full of God’s grace, we can become Grace Dispensers.
As we look at Fran’s struggle with establishing appropriate boundaries for her life, part of the problem is that she has the somewhat misplaced conception that as a Christ-follower, she should try to do what anyone asks of her. After all, she thinks, isn’t that what Jesus meant when he told us in the Sermon on the Mount that we should go the extra mile? Well, no it isn’t. One mile, yes, but not unending extra miles.
Fran faces various people in her life who are pushing her boundaries. They are each different but they represent the various ways that boundaries can become a real issue. The first one deals with a friend who continually exceeds normal and acceptable boundaries when it comes to requiring a lot of Fran’s time.
It’s Sunday afternoon and Fran has planned to spend a quiet day at home with her two children, just enjoying an afternoon to play games with Drew and Alice, and maybe even do some good reading, one of her favorite pastimes that she doesn’t get to do very often. Just as she is in the midst of a game of Crazy 8, having fun with her kids, the phone rings and Jane is on the other end.
Jane is a friend from church who calls Fran quite often and talks for long periods of time about all her issues. You might say she is a high-maintenance friend, but Fran has tried to listen and help her, thinking that this is the right thing to do. Admittedly it has become a bit out-of-balance and as Fran sees Jane’s caller ID, she is really tempted to just let it go—but she’s supposed to be there for her friends, right? So, she answers and sure enough Jane begins her typical long and detailed complaining and whining. Jane is the type who tells you how to build a clock when all you want to know is what time it is.
At first, Fran tries to encourage her and offer some suggestions, but everything she says is resisted by Jane, and it seems Fran can do nothing but listen. Whatever advice Fran may have is immediately discounted by Jane. “That wouldn’t work” is her familiar retort, or “You just don’t understand” is another.
After twenty minutes, Drew says, “Mom, aren’t we gonna finish our game?” No doubt Jane heard Drew, but she completely ignores it and continues her tirade. After another ten minutes and several pleas from Drew and Alice, Fran realizes that Jane is not going to stop anytime soon, so when Jane takes a breath, she says, “Hey, Jane, the kids and I were playing a game and I promised them we’d finish, so if you don’t mind, I need to get back to them. I’ll be praying for you. In fact, why don’t I pray for you now before we hang up?”
Jane says, “Well, I know you’re always busy and don’t have time to talk—I guess games are more important to you than friends.” And with that she hangs up, totally ignoring Fran’s offer to pray.
“Wow,” Fran says to herself, “I guess I should have let her keep talking—but honestly, it doesn’t do any good to listen to her. She simply isn’t interested in solutions or advice; all she wants is to bend my ear and get my sympathy. I don’t know, Lord, what am I supposed to do?”
Was Fran right to finally bring this conversation to a close? She feels a bit guilty, but then she feels guilty about her commitment to the kids as well. If it were a one-time event, the answer might be different. But Jane has been doing this to Fran for several weeks, but this is the first time Fran has assertively brought a conversation to the close, which obviously has not set well with Jane. Did she have a better option?
Have you got some “Janes” in your life—people who continually bend your ear and take up your time, but nothing good ever seems to come from it? Maybe it’s time to do something about it. Perhaps instead of putting up with Jane’s time-consuming litany of complaints, Fran needs to consider what she might do to help Jane, while at the same time setting some boundaries for these frequent one-sided conversations. It’s obvious that they aren’t accomplishing anything good for either woman.
As I’ve mentioned before, I’m a psychologist, but there was a season of my life when I was really struggling with what I wanted to do vocationally. And I actually tried out for the FBI. I was going to be somebody who did psychological profiling or assessments. I had no thought to having to do anything physical. And yet, no matter what, if you try out for the FBI you’ve got to pass a physical fitness test. So I trained, I worked hard. I built up the muscle and endurance. And I went in and took that test. And wouldn’t you know – I missed it by one sit-up! I was devastated. And for months afterward, all I could think about was how I missed that test by one sit-up!
It took a long time before God really laid this on my heart. The way the FBI measures success in a sit-up is by breaking a 90-degree barrier when you’re coming up. It’s not just that I didn’t do the sit-up – I did – but I didn’t break the 90-degrees. And all I could think about was missing that sit-up. But I probably got to about 75-degree angle in my sit-up.
How often do we only look at the things in our life that we’re not doing – that we’re not accomplishing? Things that we’re not living up to? When God has actually orchestrated so many amazing things in our life that are working. So I began to challenge myself to think about that one sit-up as a 75-degree success. In the world of grading, 75 is actually average. Shifting my perspective really changed the way I began to look at the factors in my life.
When it comes to radical acceptance, when it comes to seeing the barriers to change in our life, when it comes to knowing our values and our purpose, my encouragement to you is to shift your perspective. To look to see what is there. To look to see what you’ve accomplished, to look to see where God has brought you, especially in the small things.
We get caught up in the big things. All I could think about was failing that test, instead of all the steps I had taken to accomplish almost all the way there. And God has brought me into a season that I love, that I wouldn’t have been in if I had been off gallivanting around as an FBI agent (which still does sound pretty cool!). So look for what’s there. Look for what God has brought into your life.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
We’ve talked about radically accepting, owning our circumstances, what are the barriers that prevent us from doing that and defining our core values. Highlight is the concept of purpose. Purpose is the direction that we are constantly moving in. And I think one of the biggest mistakes that we make with purpose is we see it as conditional to our circumstances and seasons in life.
A couple of years ago I was jumping on the bus in Chicago. I think often times the people navigating the streets of major cities have every right to be a little bit irritated and upset. So typically, I get on the bus and the bus driver will look at me and at best give me a head nod. But this one particular day I got on the bus, this woman driving the bus looked at me and she said, “Welcome aboard my bus. It’s an amazing day, and we’re all lucky to be alive. I hope that whatever amount of time that you’re on this bus with me – the next 5 or 20 minutes – that you just really enjoy the ride.”
I was shocked. What was different about this woman? So I got on the bus, and sat down, and lo and behold she did this with every passenger that came aboard her bus. She would get on the speaker and tell people about landmarks in the city and she would encourage you to say hi to the person next to you.
So I couldn’t help myself. I worked my way up to the front of the bus and I said, “What’s going on? Why are you doing this?” And she said, “I’m just living out my purpose.”
And it struck me, that God has called us to live on purpose, in every daily decision of our life. And so often we think: my purpose is my vocation, or my purpose is to achieve a certain status, to be married, to be an executive, to have children. And yet I believe, just like this bus driver, our purpose is to carry out the love of God in every circumstance in our day. Whether it’s waiting in line at your local coffee shop, whether it’s waking up in the morning and getting your kids out the door to school on time, whether it’s balancing your budget or whether it’s in a season of difficulty, God has called us to live on purpose. I want to encourage you to consider, where is your purpose or what you’ve defined as your purpose, perhaps blocking you from actually living out what God has called you to do. See it as something that’s part of your every day.
We all say we have them, but we never take the time to consider what they are -and that is our core values. I work as a clinical psychologist, and this is something that I frequently ask my clients: What are your values?
Every one of my clients would say that they have values but to actually name what they are causes them to pause and consider. And I think it’s incredibly important for us to know at our heart and our core, what our most important values are.
So how do we go about doing that? The first thing to think about is who are all the important people in your life? Who are all those people that have had an influence over you? Maybe it’s a parent, or a grandparent or a former boss maybe it’s somebody who is well-known in the Christian world. Maybe it’s someone you’ve seen on the media. Why is that person important to you? What are the things that they represent that you really resonate with?
Then it’s thinking about the memories in your life – those events, those vacations, those family reunions that really represent things that cause healthy and positive memories in your life. Then the third is objects. We all have objects - for me my Bible is really important to me. And I’ll be honest my smartphone is really important to me. We all have objects in our life that represent something of value.
So we have got persons, memories and objects. Then the final thing is places. What are some of the places in your life? Whether it’s your childhood home, or being at the lake front or the mountains, what are those places that really represent something of significance to you. Then step back and consider what are the themes that run through these values that really suggest why these are important to you. Take time in this. As Hebrews (10:24-25) says it’s important for us to gather together to exhort one another. Seek out your community. Ask for their input. And once you’ve whittled it down, I really think that five core values are the most important. I’ll give you mine: Jesus, relationship, wisdom, authenticity and purpose. Those are my five core values. Once you’ve whittled yours down to five – no more than seven – then start to realize how they impact your daily decisions.
I think of values as the roadblocks or the barriers along the way that keep us in our two-lane highway to get from one direction to the next and to really live out the purpose that God has called us to. Next time you’re faced with a decision – big or small – consider your values as the filter through which you want to guide the direction that you are going.
I want to talk about what prevents us from radically accepting. And it’s these three barriers.
Justification Minimization And denial.
What comes to mind is a king in the Bible that was the son of Solomon. If you remember that Solomon was the king of wisdom. His son Rehoboam stepped into leadership and immediately tried to justify his actions (1 Kings 12). He tried to minimize what was going on with the Israelites and deny his role in the problem. How often do we step into those places ourselves?
So let’s think about it. When you’re involved in a situation that you want to change, it’s important to think about what are the areas that are keeping you stuck in this place. Justification is “Well this is why I’m doing it.” It’s the good old-fashioned kind of really providing an example or an argument – kind of digging your heels in and saying “Hey I have every right to be here.” It could be that you have a boss that is difficult to work with. So your justification is “I didn’t choose to work for this person. They are putting way too much pressure on me. I don’t really have a choice in the matter.” We can always own something in our decisions.
The second barrier to change and to radical acceptance is minimization. Minimization is saying it’s not that big of a deal. It’s not taking ownership of what we contribute to a conflict or a lack of resolution to a situation. Maybe it’s our attitude or our response to a spouse or a coworker or to a child. What I’m saying, how I’m acting – it’s not having that much of an impact.
Then the final barrier – which is the hardest to take ownership over- is denial. Denial takes first really recognizing that with every problem, even though our contribution may not be significant it always takes two to Tango. We always contribute something to the situation and circumstances that we’re in.
So if you find yourself in a season of really struggling to own and accept what is happening in your life right now, consider taking a step back, reflecting, pausing, and asking the question: why am I stuck here? What am I justifying? What am I minimizing? Or even what am I denying? Then how can you begin to take ownership of your role and start to shift and change towards the perspective that really reflects God’s purpose and the values that he has instilled in your life.
I want to talk briefly about a concept called radical acceptance. I was reading the first chapter in First Samuel and I was thinking about Hannah and how often she went up to the temple and cried out to the Lord because he had not given her a child. And I think about these seasons in life that we’re in that we didn’t choose. That perhaps our decisions did get us there but the outcome isn’t what we wanted. We are struggling to really see why God has me here in this particular season of life.
And I think one of the things we so often struggle with is looking and recognizing the opportunity that we may still have in this season even though we didn’t choose it or want to be there. And this is where that concept of radical acceptance comes in. I like to use this analogy with radical acceptance.
We’re in the heart of Chicago. We have this beautiful river in Chicago that flows through downtown. And let’s say that you’re out walking along the river walk on a beautiful summer evening and someone isn’t paying attention and knocks you into the river.
Now you didn’t choose to be there, you didn’t want to be there, but you have got to get out. So radical acceptance is saying okay: this is where I’m at right now and it’s all the emotions that come with it, the disappointment, the fear, the anxiety, the upset emotion, that drives you to stay in that place.
It’s saying this is what it is and I may not want to be here but there’s also no guarantee that I’m going to be here forever. And sometimes we get stuck with that roadblock.
And so what does it take to say, alright, in this season, (maybe it’s singleness, maybe it’s infertility, maybe it’s conflict in your marriage) I’m going to radically accept this. And this is not resignation. It’s not giving up and throwing in the white flag of surrender. It’s saying I’m going to accept where I am at right now. I’m going to say it is what it is and then I’m going to shift my perspective to see where God can still use me. To see where I can step forward in the river. It’s saying I don’t want to be here, but I’m here and in order to do that I need to start swimming to get out.
What in your life today can you be radically accepting and looking at the opportunities that God has in front of you and moving towards those recognizing that, like many other options and opportunities in life, this is just a season.
In order to be effective as ambassadors for Christ we need a strong biblical foundation and a vibrant and consistent growing faith and trust in our Lord. There are many people who can help us with that endeavor, and I am delighted to sit down with Deb Gorton. Deb is a licensed clinical psychologist with lots of credentials. She is the head of the counseling center at Moody Bible Institute in Chicago. Deb’s passion is the intersection of faith and mental health and wellness.
Click the play button to hear the entire interview.
Para ser eficaces como embajadores de Cristo, necesitamos una base bíblica sólida, y una fe y una confianza en nuestro Señor vibrantes y constantes. Hay muchas personas que pueden ayudarnos con ese esfuerzo, y estoy encantada de sentarme con Deb Gorton. Deb es una psicóloga clínica licenciada con muchas credenciales. Ella es la directora del centro de consejería del Instituto Bíblico Moody en Chicago. La pasión de Deb es la intersección de la fe y la salud y el bienestar mental.
Haga clic en el botón de reproducción para escuchar la entrevista completa en Inglés.
Do you ever struggle with pride? I can tell you that it is an ever-present struggle for me. Through many years as I’ve been growing in my faith, this is the thing that God repeatedly convicts me of and helps me with. As I’ve been sharing some entries from my personal spiritual journals, I thought I’d share this one, which is personal—never intended to be shared when I wrote it. But maybe it will encourage you and help you to learn to always let God deal with you where you need help. Luke 10:20: However, do not rejoice that the spirits submit to you, but rejoice that your names are written in heaven. The 72 people who were following Jesus at the time were excited because they were able to cast out demons and the demons submitted to them. That must have been some trip. Imagine how heady it was for these 72 to go about with this power. Imagine the acclaim they undoubtedly received from those who saw them. They were joyful and excited because of this unique power Jesus had given them.
But Jesus immediately reminds them that they should not be rejoicing in this Jesus-given power they had. Rather their rejoicing should be because they were redeemed, their eternity was certain.
Lord, you know how I desire earthly acclaim. You know that I want people to acknowledge the gifts and power you have placed in me. And I confess that these desires are selfish and prideful and sinful.
Please God, help me to just simply rejoice that my name is written in heaven. Please keep me simple—just focused and joyful because you have chosen me and I am predestined to spend eternity with you! This is the cure for my pride—rejoicing that my name is written in heaven. I don’t deserve it; I haven’t earned it; I can never claim any credit for it. Grace alone! May I rejoice in your grace and nothing else, nothing less!
Well, I hope you will consider the benefits of journaling for yourself. It requires some time and some discipline, but the results are remarkable. So, get yourself a journal today and get started. You’ll never regret it.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
I wonder if you have trouble keeping a consistent prayer time in your life? It’s a common challenge for many of us Christians. I’ve been sharing a few of the entries from some of my journals, to hopefully inspire you to keep a journal and give you some idea of what that might look like. These journals are personal and unique; there is no right or wrong way to do it. I simply record what God seems to be saying to me after I have read my daily Bible reading. Here’s an entry from Matthew 26:41. It is what Jesus said to the disciples who went to sleep in the Garden of Gethsemane, after he had asked them to pray for him: Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing but the body is weak. That sure describes me, Lord. Willing spirit—weak body. Interesting that Jesus said this to the disciples when they failed to pray with him. They “fell into the temptation” of prayerlessness.
It is tempting not to pray. Why? Because prayer requires bodily involvement. Your body must cooperate with your spirit. Your body naturally fights your spirit. Prayer requires victory over your body’s natural desire to:
Sleep Do something Do nothing Relax Be entertained Be pampered Be in control
Prayer must be motivated by love—a true desire to know God, a heart-cry for Jesus, a thirst for the living God. But it must be accompanied by a strong, disciplined body, a body brought into subjection.
This is the challenge of prayer—to find that balance between love-motivation and controlled-body. One without the other is to “fall into temptation.” Lord, teach me to pray.
Have you ever prayed for the fear of the Lord to be upon you? These are thoughts I have recorded during my daily Bible reading times. They are a record of God’s teaching to me, through his Word and the inspiration of the Holy Spirit who dwells in every believer.
I’m so glad I’ve kept these journals for as I go back and re-read them, they re-teach me and remind me of lessons I might have otherwise forgotten. If you’ve never consistently kept a spiritual journal, I want to encourage you to do it. That means you have a structured reading plan in the Bible each day, and then you ask God to speak to you through his Word. Most days you’ll have something you want to write in your journal, and it truly will aid your spiritual growth.
Here’s what I wrote after reading 2 Chronicles 19:
2 Chronicles 19:7: “Now let the fear of the Lord be upon you...”
These were Jehoshaphat’s instructions to the judges in his land because they were not judging for man but for the Lord.
When a person is God’s representative, she is in a sacred place. James 3:1 tells us that we who teach will be judged by a higher standard. Therefore we—I—must “let the fear of the Lord be upon me.”
Lord, give me a fear of you as you have given me a place of responsibility and leadership. May I have a holy fear of you—a fear that reminds me of my responsibility to be pure, honest, open, without guile or pretense. A fear that causes me to live a holy life and never forget that I am accountable to you for how I use the position you have given me.
Teach me the balance of being love-driven and at the same time, “letting the fear of the Lord be upon me.” Verse nine in 2 Chronicles says, “You must serve faithfully and wholeheartedly in the fear of the Lord.” Teach me how to serve you like this, Lord.
Many times I write my journal entries as a prayer to the Lord. This is a good prayer and one I need to pray often. Again, I encourage you to start a spiritual journal; you’ll be very glad you did.
Have you ever kept a journal to record your spiritual growth? I have found journaling to be a real help and aid to growing up in Christ. So, to perhaps inspire you to journal as you read God’s Word, and to give you some idea of what that might look like, I’m sharing some entries from my journals. They come from the passage that I read for the day. Here’s one from Psalm 106:24-25: Then they despised the pleasant lands; they did not believe his promise. They grumbled in their tents and did not obey the Lord. These verses refer to the children of Israel as they were slowly making their way to the Promised Land. It’s interesting that we are given this detail: “They grumbled in their tents.” The children of Israel thought they could grumble “in their tents” in privacy. They had a right to say what they thought “in their tents”—where no one but those closest relatives and friends would know.
Perhaps they put on a good face outside their tents, but in their tents, where they thought no one could see or hear, they grumbled. Their true attitude came out.
God hears our “tent grumbling.” The attitude of my heart does not go unnoticed by God, no matter how appropriate I may appear outside “my tent.” And that grumbling—that discontentment—that self-focus—always shows to others, whether I realize it or not.
Remember, God sees your grumbling heart, even when no one else does. Rejoice in the Lord always. Even in your tent!
That’s the end of the entry for that day, but I hope you can see how God can take a passage that may seem meaningless on first reading, and through the Holy Spirit can show you a truth and teach you a lesson that truly touches your life.
I’m going to be more intentional about eliminating “tent grumbling” from my life; I hope you will, too.
For many years I have kept a journal of thoughts that have been inspired as I read God’s Word each day. These journals are simply a record of how God is teaching me in my life, as I have learned to “feed myself” spiritually.
In browsing through one of these journals recently, I thought it might be helpful to share some of these with you. Hopefully these truths that are based on Scripture will inspire you, but also I’m praying it will help you see how you can journal for yourself and how meaningful that can be to your life as you “grow up in Christ.” Each one begins with a passage or verse that has come from my daily reading: John 13:3 – 5: Jesus knew that the Father had put all things under his power, and that he had come from God and was returning to God; so he got up from the meal, took off his outer clothing, and wrapped a towel around his waist. After that, he poured water into a basin and began to wash his disciples’ feet, drying them with the towel that was wrapped around him. Jesus was totally secure with who he was. He was totally confident in his relationship with his Father. And he knew fully what his destiny was—why he was on earth. Because he was so fully assured of this, therefore he took the role of a servant.
It is difficult to be a servant if you have to prove who you are. If it is important for you to have praise and recognition from people, servanthood will not be your pursuit.
The person who is mature in his or her faith, who knows her position in Christ and is totally confident she is doing the Father’s will—that person will naturally be a servant to others.
If Jesus just meant we were to literally wash each other’s feet, frankly that would be easier than having a servant attitude all the time. It almost seems like a non-sequitur in this passage: Jesus knew who he was and therefore he became a servant. Servanthood is the result of having a true understanding of who we are in Christ and being truly humble as we recognize that it is only because of Christ that we can do or be anything worthwhile.
No matter what you do on your job each day, you have developed skills and abilities through that job that are valuable. I have a friend who is teaching communication skills in a very different cross-cultural place overseas. As she was telling me what she does and how she has learned to communicate in this challenging setting, I told her that the skills she is learning and her experience in this job, though difficult at times, are giving her skills and abilities that are rare and very valuable. She’s learning “on the job” as we say, and that knowledge and skill is making her a much more valuable employee.
Certainly that’s been true in my life, as well, as I spent many years conducting training seminars in my company and for many other companies across the country. That experience of putting together and making an effective presentation is a skill that God was teaching me through my job—and one he now uses for ministry purposes.
But what I want to talk about is not the performance skills and experience you gain through your employment, as helpful as they are, but the many other life skills and relationship skills you are learning, even though while you’re in the midst of it, it may seem more like baptism by fire rather than a training experience. Here are some examples of the practical and important things you should be learning in a job, if indeed you’re doing a good job. You learn
The importance of being on time The importance of meeting deadlines How to work with a team to accomplish a task How critical it is to fulfill your promises and commitments That it’s very important to do everything with excellence, and avoid do-overs That procrastination is deadly That you can’t afford to let things fall between the cracks
Those are just some of the practical things you learn when you accept the responsibility of a job. For sure a job well-done will require these kinds of skills. And if you aren’t willing to learn these things, it will affect your progress, your promotions, your paycheck—it will hold you back.
So, I would ask you to survey your work habits in these areas. Are you learning these things, or are you resisting them? I’ve often said that a Christ-follower may not be the smartest or the most educated or the most experienced person on their job, but they can be the most dependable, the hardest worker, and have the highest level of integrity. No matter what you do or where God takes you, these characteristics will always be important to your success, to pleasing God.
Now, let’s think of some other things God wants to teach you through your job. I think toward the top of that list would be learning to love people you may not like that much! Your coworkers are not necessarily people you would choose to be with five days a week, eight hours a day. No doubt you have discovered that not everyone is “your type,” and so you are challenged to get along with people that are not that easy to get along with.
In the 13th chapter of 1 Corinthians, the Bible teaches us the true definition of love. It is patient, it is kind, it looks for the good in people, not the bad, it doesn’t hold grudges, it hangs in with someone when others have given up, it endures all things. God’s love is an action, not necessarily a feeling, and you can choose to love someone by showing them these kinds of actions, even if you don’t like the way they behave, the way they treat you, their work habits, or their lifestyle. Almost any job you have—and that includes working in a Christian environment—places you in the company of other people, and you have the privilege, the great opportunity, to learn to love people with God’s kind of love. That means you become more and more like Jesus, as you follow his commandment to “love one another.”
Of course, you also have the option of refusing to learn this lesson, and instead just being continually irritated and negative about the people you work with or for.
Watch out for that send button! That send button on your computer makes it easy to get a message off right away, but it also can become your Achilles’ heel if it is used carelessly.
Remember that everything you send through email is out there somewhere in cyberspace forever and ever! You may intend it to be for one person’s eyes only, but it can very easily be distributed or read by people who were never supposed to read it. Whatever you say in cyberspace cannot be taken back. You lose control of your message once you hit send. Those emails can come back to harm you, to destroy friendships, even to ruin careers.
Not long ago I wrote an email about a sensitive situation and was just about to send it, when I realized there was no way I wanted that email in cyberspace. And then, also not long ago, I sent an email to the wrong person. I chose the correct first name, but failed to see that there was more than one person in my address book with that first name and I sent it to the wrong person. Thankfully it wasn’t of a sensitive nature so there was no harm done, but I just realized again how easy it is to send an email to the wrong person.
So, a good rule of thumb is to read over every word in your email before you send it. Check the name or names on the To line and make sure they are correct. And then ask yourself, Is there anything in this email that should not be in writing? If in doubt, don’t! Pick up the phone or wait until you see that person to communicate that message. It’s not as fast, but it could save you lots of trouble in the future.
Proverbs 21:23 says, “Those who guard their mouths and their tongues keep themselves from calamity.” Guarding your words—even those electronic words—can truly help you avoid calamity.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
What is the most annoying thing about electronic communication to you? Don’t you wish that in order to use emails, everyone had to agree to certain rules of etiquette? No doubt you get lots of junk emails and long emails and annoying emails regularly. The question is, are you careful to avoid those email mistakes yourself?
For example, don’t be the person who sends out a constant stream of informational emails to people who have not requested them or don’t need them. For example, forwarding articles or other emails that have a political bent to them is truly not smart professionally. And getting a constant stream of jokes or funny stories can become annoying. Even inspirational emails can be overdone.
I have to confess that these streams of emails are the ones I generally don’t read. I take a look at the subject, see who it’s from, and make a determination whether it’s worth my time to read a long email. However, people I know and trust occasionally send me very worthwhile things to read, and because it is infrequent, I know they have thoughtfully sent something that I will want to read, so I do. It’s good to remember that anything can be overdone. Again, less is more.
If you have a particularly complex communication, or if there is a significant emotional content to a message you need to send, determine if sending it by email is the best way to go. For example, if you need to apologize, it may be best to do that by phone or in person. Or when you’re delivering a message you know they don’t want to hear, such as denying a request of some sort, that is usually done best in a personal communication. Don’t use email communication to avoid the uncomfortable message or to cover up a mistake. In the long run, it will create more problems for you.
Have you found emailing to be a blessing or a curse? It has certainly improved our ability to communicate quickly and easily, but it can become our master. We can truly become addicted to and in bondage to our emails. It’s a tool we need to use, for sure, but we need to use it wisely and correctly.
A few more rules of etiquette for emails, in addition to the ones I have already shared with you.
Be informal but not sloppy. Your email communication represents you and your organization, so it’s just as important to use correct spelling, grammar and punctuation as it would be for a printed communication. When you have an email for a group of people, consider how much more effective it might be if the email were individually sent to each person. Now, it’s certainly not necessary to do this with every group email, but for important communications that you definitely want to be read, an email addressed to me personally, for example, will carry more weight than one addressed to me and several others. Using all capital letters looks as if you’re shouting, so only use it when you want to shout! Maybe there are times to shout for joy and that can be effective, but most of the time it gives a negative effect. Instead, use a font color to highlight things. Generally, the fewer words you use, the more effectively you will communicate. Most of us use far more words than are necessary to get our messages across, and people just start to tune us out. A good suggestion is to edit every email before you send it and eliminate unnecessary words. Less is definitely more when it comes to emails.
The Apostle Paul wrote “So whatever you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God” (1 Cor. 10:31). Well, as a Christ-follower that means that your communication skills—which is something you do—should be done for God’s glory. I do emails everyday; most of you do as well, I’m sure. I want even the emails I send to bring honor, not dishonor, to my Lord.
How is your email etiquette? Recently a good friend was telling me the woes she is having with email communication. She is a computer programmer, and in order to help her coworkers, she sends emails with instructions on how to avoid problems, use the system better, etc. Her motivation is totally right; she wants to help. But some of her coworkers interpret her emails as being critical. What is she doing wrong?
Proverbs 16:21 says: “The wise in heart are called discerning, and gracious words promote instruction.” Another translation says, “sweetness of speech increases persuasiveness.” This principle holds true for emails as much as it does for the spoken word. Your choice of words always makes a difference. And remember that asking is usually better than telling.
A good way to judge how your words will be perceived is to read your email out loud to yourself before you send it and see how the words sound when they are spoken. That will often give you a clue as to the tone of your message and how it could be perceived by the person receiving it.
Some email do’s and don’ts:
Be careful with your use of emotional symbols, like the smiley face. You may find it clever or funny, but the recipient may not. Save those for casual messages between friends. Remember that not everyone is as computer savvy as you are, and they may not understand those on-line abbreviations that have become popular. So, be careful using those. Start your business emails with a salutation. If you’re writing to three people or less, use their names: Hello, Tom, Jane and Linda. If you’re writing to more than three, you can use a common greeting, something as simple as “Hello.” But starting an email with no salutation can be perceived as harsh. If you’re involved in a long email going back and forth, you can eliminate the salutation after the first reply, but when in doubt, it never hurts to use a greeting.
This is one area where I have to watch myself, because I just want to get to the meat of the message and skip the “niceties,” thinking they’re not necessary. But it truly can make a difference in the minds of others, so take the time to add that salutation.
Did you know that email messaging now exceeds telephone traffic and is the dominant form of business communication? Businesses report that many of their employees spend three to four hours a day on email. And most of us would say, “What did we ever do without email?”
However, along with this change in the way we communicate has come a new set of challenges. Communicating electronically is a very different medium, and if we are going to be effective in our jobs, we will need to learn how to use this tool and not abuse it. And that includes not only email, but Facebook, Twitter, and all the others which seem to pop up daily.
I thought it might be helpful to talk about ways to improve our electronic communication skills. You know, the way we communicate creates impressions and perceptions of us as people. And as Christ-followers, we not only represent ourselves, but more importantly, we are ambassadors for Jesus Christ. Paul wrote to the Corinthians, “For we are taking pains to do what is right, not only in the eyes of the Lord but also in the eyes of man” (2 Cor. 8:21). I think it behooves us to take pains to improve our communications skills.
Let me begin by saying that as convenient as electronic communication is, it cannot replace the power of personal interaction. There are many times when face-to-face, voice-to-voice communication is absolutely the better way to go. No doubt we’ve lost a lot of personal touch because we use electronic means too often and too much. It’s much more difficult to communicate caring and compassion by email than it is in person.
It’s true that we may communicate more often because we have these convenient ways to do it, but it’s also true that the impersonal nature of electronic communication can cause us to be careless in how we say things. It can make us sound cold and harsh. We must learn to put ourselves in the shoes of the person reading our emails and find ways to communicate courtesy and thoughtfulness electronically.
How many days do you have left? That’s a very sobering, somewhat unsettling question, isn't it? We don't like to think about the fact that our days here on this earth are numbered. Oh, we all know the number behind us—how many days we've lived already. But thinking about how many are left—well, that's not something we think about too often. In fact, most of us live as though our days are without number.
In Psalm 39:4 David wrote:
"Show me, O Lord, my life's end and the number of my days; let me know how fleeting my life is."
And in Psalm 90:12 Moses prayed:
"Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom."
These men of God were not asking for a gift of prophecy, but rather for a change in perspective. They understood that living in the knowledge of how fleeting life is becomes a life-changing attitude, and they recognized that this attitude doesn't come naturally to anyone. So, they prayed for the ability to number their days.
I would suggest that all of us need to pray this prayer pretty regularly: "Lord, teach me to number my days correctly.” This is God’s method of counting, and it is powerful, once you learn it. You see, how you number your days has everything to do with how you live your life! Let me try to illustrate this for you.
Let's say that you learn that a coworker has been given a promotion that you deserve. That is hurtful and your natural reaction is anger, retribution, self-defense. But suppose you knew you only had five more days here on this earth. Would that loss of promotion have much, if any, effect on you? No, I doubt it, because since your days are few, a lost promotion isn't really important, is it?
That's what David meant when he prayed, "Let me know how fleeting is my life.” You see, this is an attitude that has to come from God because it is not a natural, human tendency to number our days aright. Moses prayed "Teach me to number my days," and we need to sign up for that course as well. It is an attitude that has to be learned and imposed into our lives, but when we learn this lesson, we gain a heart of wisdom.
All of us tend to live as though these days here on earth are numberless, don't we? We just don't naturally think about the fact that our days on earth will not go on forever. But as David wrote in Psalm 39:5: “You have made my days a mere handbreadth; the span of my years is as nothing before you. Everyone is but a breath...” And again in Psalm 103:15-16: "The life of mortals is like grass, they flourish like a flower of the field; the wind blows over it and it is gone, and its place remembers it no more.." David is not telling us that our lives have no meaning, but rather he is reminding us that whether we have five days, five years, or fifty-five years or more remaining in these numbered days, they are very few compared to the numberless days ahead of us. Both he and Moses asked God to teach them to number their days; to help them live in the knowledge that life is short.
Here’s another illustration of how life-changing it is to number your days aright. Suppose you find out today what someone said about you, and it is untrue, unfair and unkind. Your feelings are hurt. You want to say something bad about him or her in return. But if you stop and number your days, it changes your reaction. You’re not as likely to want retribution, your anger dissipates, your stress goes down. When you remember to number your days, you realize that someone's hurtful words cannot affect your numberless days yet to come. It won’t matter in eternity; it probably won’t matter next week!
From time to time we all get criticisms that are not constructive. If you're like me, you want to defend yourself immediately. But God is teaching me to number my days when I'm criticized unfairly and say to myself: "What difference does it make, Mary? Life is short; you have other eternally important things to do.”
When you number your days correctly,
I certainly believe there are times when we should actively pursue another job or another career, when the right thing to do is find a place to work which uses our abilities better or get more education so we can advance to better jobs, or simply find a better working environment. But if you're in a job you hate, however long you are going to be in that job, as a Christ-follower, you should learn to be content there. The Apostle Paul said he learned to be content in any circumstance, and he was in some very bad situations. If he can learn contentment, so can we.
Let me tell you the story of a woman in Wisconsin who found herself in a job she hated. It was a manufacturing job with repetitive and boring duties. She graduated from college with very good grades but found herself in this job that was beneath her. Finally, after hearing my message on The Freedom of a Captive Mind, she decided to change her attitude about that job and to think of it as her mission field. She began reprogramming her mind with Scripture, memorizing verses on the job, and singing songs of praise in that factory job.
Her co-workers noticed the change in her. They began to ask her to sing her songs, and many times she was able to share the Scripture she was memorizing in conversations with different individuals. She started praying for her co-workers, and they began to come to her with their needs and ask her to pray for them.
She was able to lead one of her co-workers to know Jesus as her Savior, and touched the lives of all who worked with her. Yes, the work was boring, but she made the best of a tough job because she looked at it through the eyes of eternity, and asked God to use her there.
It's fine to look for a new job but one thing you don’t want to do is to leave in defeat. If and when you move on from that job you don’t like, you want to leave in victory. You don’t want to be running away from that job; you want to be leaving in good standing, with a good testimony, and with the knowledge that God is now opening a door and you’re leaving in victory. That is really important.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
If you find yourself in a job you don’t like, you need to know that you can learn to be content right where you are. And when you learn that, you are in a win-win situation, because you no longer allow yourself to be a victim of your job circumstances.
Ask God what he has to teach you through this job. Have you gone to God and said, "Lord, I'm in a job I hate and I can't get out. Why am I here? What are you trying to teach me or do through me in this job?"
You remember Joseph, sold into slavery in Egypt by his brothers and treated unfairly and cruelly by his captors, wrongly imprisoned for two years for doing the right thing. Then God delivered him from that prison and he became second in command to the Pharaoh. Joseph said of his bad experience that his brothers meant harm to him when they sold him into slavery, but God meant it for good. Joseph allowed God to turn a terrible experience into a blessing. But please note that God was able to turn it into a blessing because Joseph was willing to let him.
God may have you in that job you hate because he has a blessing there for you, but because of your attitude, he can't work that blessing for you yet. If Joseph had gotten bitter or remained angry or been rebellious, he would not have been able to interpret the Pharaoh's dream and he would have just rotted in that prison.
Are you rotting in your miserable job because you haven't given God permission to use it in your life for good? Believe me, there are miracles waiting for you in that job you don’t like, if you will in humility make up your mind to work for God and seek his reward and look for the good that God wants to do for you and through you right where you are. You'll know contentment even in a miserable job if you have that attitude in you.
It's the attitude that Jesus had when he was willing to leave heaven and come to earth to die for us. Surely it was a job he didn't relish, but he knew God would work redemption through it, and so he submitted to the good that God wanted to do by sending him to a job he did not enjoy.
Do you have a hard time making yourself go to work each day because you really don’t like your job? As Christ-followers in the marketplace, we need to show an attitude toward our jobs that is different from the non-believers, and whether we like our jobs or not, we should learn to be content with those jobs as long as we have them.
There are some little things you can do to improve the atmosphere where you work. For example, brighten your workspace with something that brings a smile to your face. Maybe it’s a poster of a place you love, and you can put that up in your workspace. Buy yourself a verse-of-the-day calendar, and as you flip it over each morning, meditate on that verse for a minute.
You could also go to our website and sign up to receive my daily devotionals as an email each morning, like a spiritual shot-in-the-arm waiting for you as you get to work. Thousands of people do that each day, and we’ve gotten lots of positive feedback that it has really helped them approach their workday with an improved attitude.
Another thing is to set some goals for yourself each week—things to do that will help you grow in the job or learn new skills or take some positive action toward looking for a new job. I have a friend who is really eager to change jobs right now, so she is quietly networking with people who can help her connect and give her guidance as she begins this process.
But meanwhile, as long as you’re in the job you have, don’t allow your desire to leave cause you to have poor performance. In fact, set a goal that you are going to do your work even better than ever, and truly pursue excellence in what you’re doing. That will take discipline, but it will be very rewarding. Just because you’re not happy with the job you have doesn’t give you an excuse to slough off and do your work half-heartedly.
Be honest with yourself and ask God to search your heart and show you what part of your dissatisfaction could be your own fault. There’s usually two sides to every story, so don’t be afraid to confront your own attitude and performance and recognize where you need to improve.
Do you hate your job—or maybe hate is too strong a word—you just don’t like it? Studies show that a large percentage of workers really hate their jobs. Maybe you hate it because it's boring, or because the people you work with are difficult, or because you have an impossible boss.
Well, if you have a tough job—one you’d ditch if you could—here's what you do: change employers. That's right—just change employers right now, today. But, you say, “I can't just change jobs like that.” Oh, I didn't say change jobs; I said change employers. Paul wrote to the Colossians: "Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart as working for the Lord, not for human masters" (3:23).
Did you realize you can change employers without changing jobs? Just say out loud, "I no longer work for that company or that person; I have a new boss. I now work for the Lord.” Keep that thought in your mind all day long as you're working and keep telling yourself over and over this truth: "I report to Jesus. Therefore, I must be careful how I act, and I need to watch my attitude, because I have a new boss: Jesus."
I don't care how tough your job is or how much you dislike it, if you work for Jesus, if you consider him your boss, if you continually remind yourself that you will give an account to him as to how you have performed in your job, and furthermore, that he will reward you if you do a good job, you can make the best of a tough job.
Believe me, I know because I've had to practice this myself. For three years I worked in a job I wanted desperately to leave. The first year there I did everything I could to find another job, and nothing happened. Finally, I realized God had me there for some purpose, and I decided to work for God, not for that company and not for that impossible boss. As soon as I changed employers, I was content in that job. And God taught me lessons for the next two years in that job I didn’t like, which I could not have learned anywhere else. He also used me to witness to others who worked there. But nothing good happened until I changed employers.
Make this biblical principle a reality in your life today: Don't work for people or money or a company; work for Jesus. I promise, you can make the best of a tough job by changing employers.
It’s probably true that some of you just can’t stand your job. If you could, you would quit tomorrow but you feel like you're in a prison because you need a job, you’ve got time and benefits invested in this job, finding the right new job is difficult, and yet you hate the job you’re in.
I can understand your feelings because I've had a job or two like that myself. But the Apostle Paul wrote to the Philippians: ...I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation....I can do everything through him who gives me strength. (Philippians 4:11-13) You know, if you can learn this secret of being content, as Paul learned it, you can't lose because your fulfillment and satisfaction will not be based on circumstances—not based on whether you have a terrific job that you love or one that you don’t like so much!
The first thing you need to do is stop feeding negative messages to yourself about your job. The more you say or think, “I hate my job,” the more you will hate it. You accomplish nothing good by daily reminding yourself that you are not happy with your job. So, replace wrong thoughts and words with positive ones. Say or think, “I’m grateful to have a job. Some people would give anything to have this job or any job at all.”
Then, develop a morning routine that starts your day right. Your day is won or lost in the morning hours, and if you simply wait until the last minute, fall out of bed, rush to work, all the time thinking how much you hate to go to work, you don’t have a chance at having a good day. So, get yourself up earlier, have a structured plan for reading God’s Word each morning, praying for others and for your own attitude, and leaving for work in a joyful mood. We are to rejoice in the Lord always, as Philippians 4:4 reminds us, and that includes when we’re working in a job we don’t like so much.
Jesus recognized this tendency we have to compare ourselves to others, and the sinful consequences when we do. Think about the parable of the Pharisee and the Tax Collector, as given in Luke 18:9-14: "To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everyone else, Jesus told this parable: “Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other people—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’ But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’ “I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.” We look at this Pharisee and think, "How awful!” And yet how easy it is for us to compare ourselves to others with that same type of attitude. Like the Pharisee, we compare outward appearances and end up thinking we're pretty hot stuff. That kind of comparison leads us to a false security about ourselves and it leads us into pride.
How insidiously pride creeps into our thinking. How about you? Have you been looking at others lately and thinking: "Well, I look better than she does," or "I perform better than he does," or "I've got more to offer than they do.” When you make these kinds of comparisons, the sin of pride is taking over your mind. Jesus said at the end of this parable: "For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted” (Luke 18:14).
Listen to yourself think and talk and see how often you compare yourself to others and end up feeling pretty proud of yourself. It's a very dangerous road to be on. The Apostle Paul wrote to the Philippians that they should consider others more important than themselves. That's the attitude we need to have toward others.
What I find is particularly prevalent among business people is that we compare our positions and our salaries, and think we're more important than others because we've climbed the ladder higher or gotten another raise. Certainly that's one of the real dangers we face if we are ambitious—the sin of pride in thinking that we're better than others because we've got a bigger title or office.
Remember that in eternity those titles and salaries will have no meaning. For a Christian they should simply be viewed as resources to be used by God. If you're in that very typical but sinful practice of comparing your status to others and judging worth based on position, please read carefully Philippians 2 and 1 Corinthians 4:6-7. They will give you God's perspective.
Secondly, comparing ourselves to others can lead us to think that others are better than us. Consider the parable of the talents that Jesus gave us in Luke 19:11-27. Before leaving on a long trip, the master gives three servants certain talents, or resources. One servant received five talents, one two, and the third servant received only one talent.
When the master returned, he asked each of them to give an account of what they had done with those resources. The first servant reported that his five talents were now ten; the second servant similarly reported that his two talents were now four. But what about the third servant? He had taken his one talent and done nothing with it, and he had to report to the master that because he was afraid of losing it, he had hidden it and it was still only one.
The master rewards the first two servants equally: "Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful in a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master's happiness!” (Matt. 25:23). Even though one had ten and one had only four, they got the same exact reward.
The friends you choose reflect and influence the person you are. There are two more relationships I want to mention.
Business partners are very important relationships because when you are in business with a person, that person will inevitably have a very strong influence on you, just as a marriage partner does. From 1 Corinthians 6:14 we see that believers should not be yoked together with unbelievers, and when you have a legal or implied partnership with someone in business, that is being yoked together. That partner has the power and influence to make decisions and form business practices which could be quite unbiblical and unacceptable to a believer who intends to honor God in their business lives.
I don't believe this applies to co-workers, people we work with or for, but to those with whom we are in some kind of partnership. So, if you're in business with someone, or contemplating it, remember that if you choose the wrong partner, you will be inviting disaster to your business endeavor as well as your spiritual life.
Another relationship you need to be very cautious about is anyone you go to as a counselor. Whether that counselor is a casual acquaintance, good friend, a professional psychologist, or a spiritual leader, it is your responsibility to ensure that the counsel you receive is biblical and edifying. Just because someone has a degree of some sort, or has a position of importance or influence does not automatically mean that that person is qualified to be your counselor.
How do you know if you're with the right counselor or not? Well, if a counselor gives you advice that is in any way unbiblical, you have chosen the wrong counselor. Any counselor who leads you to be self-focused, to concentrate primarily on your past, to shift blame, and to be dependent upon them instead of the Lord, is not giving you good counsel. In Psalm 1:1 (NASB) we read that blessed is the person who walks not in the counsel of the wicked. Be careful from whom you seek counsel.
Remember the verse from Proverbs 12:26: "The righteous choose their friends carefully, but the way of the wicked leads them astray." It is so true that when we continue in wrong relationships, we are much more likely to go down to their level than we are to bring them up to our level. So, please check out your relationships. They are having a significant impact in your life.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
The Bible gives us direct and clear guidance about selecting friends.
For example, in 1 Corinthians 5:11 Paul wrote: "I am writing you that you must not associate with anyone who calls himself a brother or sister but is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolater, or a slanderer, a drunkard or a swindler. Do not even eat with such people." Now, that's pretty strong guidance about relationships, wouldn't you agree.
Quite a few years ago I had a wonderful group of women meeting in my home weekly for Bible study and prayer, and we considered ourselves accountable to each other. At one point a new person started attending, and we were glad to have her. But she finally told us that she was living with a man to whom she was not married. We gave her strong biblical advice to immediately break that relationship off, but she was not willing to do that.
Over a few week's time I noticed that her presence in our group was affecting our fellowship and our ability to pray like before. Finally one morning God clearly directed me, through this passage in 1 Corinthians 5:11, to ask her to drop out of our Bible study until she was willing to obey Scripture.
I met with her privately, and as gently and lovingly as possible, explained from God's Word why she could no longer be a part of our group. She accepted it well, though she still refused to obey the Lord. That certainly wasn't pleasant, but it was the right thing to do. Since we weren't able to influence her to do the right thing, the only alternative was to keep her from doing harm to our group. We still remained friends with her, but we could not continue that kind of fellowship.
Is there someone in your life that is living immorally? Or someone who is greedy or dishonest? Maybe someone who slanders and gossips a lot, or is a drunkard? If you continue to associate with that person without pointing out the error, he or she will take that as approval on your part and the sin will not seem to that person so sinful. And you'll notice that your continued close association with them will start to affect your attitude toward sin and will drag you down spiritually.
Remember what James wrote: "Friendship with the world is hatred toward God. Therefore, anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God" (James 4:4). Don't let the enemy defeat you through wrong relationships.
Did you know that the Bible has a lot to tell us about choosing our friends? Certainly we all are influenced by the circle of close friends we have around us. Does your circle of friends encourage your walk with God or do they drag you down?
Proverbs 12:26 says: "The righteous choose their friends carefully, but the way of the wicked leads them astray." What does it mean to be cautious in friendship? Well, let me give you some examples.
Suppose you have a co-worker who seems to really like you and wants to have lunch with you often, stops to talk with you frequently, and so forth. She is very friendly and pleasant, but you know pretty quickly that she is not a believer, just by the way she talks and by her lifestyle. Nevertheless, she pursues a friendship with you, and initiates invitations for further time together.
But you notice that when you're with her, she often tells off-color stories, or laughs about things that aren't exactly upright. She has a totally different set of moral values from you and what interests her is of little or no interest to you. In fact, you find that at best the conversation is frivolous and shallow. Perhaps you've tried on several occasions to talk about the Lord or about your faith, but it doesn't seem to get anywhere.
Is that a friendship you want to keep pursuing? I believe being cautious in friendship would mean to carefully and gently back away from spending considerable time with this person, since you're not able to influence her, but are instead forced to listen to things either inappropriate or inconsequential. That is not an edifying relationship.
Here’s another biblical principle from Proverbs 22:24-25: "Do not make friends with a hot-tempered person, do not associate with one easily angered, or you may learn their ways and get yourself ensnared." That's pretty clear advice, isn't it? Someone who is not self-controlled, who is angry a lot, negative often, and quick-on-the-trigger is a person who will drag you down. Got any close friends like that? I think this biblical directive would say, "Back off."
Maybe you're thinking, "But Mary, these people are not friends, they're family members and I can't avoid them." It's true that avoiding family relationships is neither feasible nor desirable, but we still must be careful not to allow those relationships to drag us down spiritually.
Do you have any relationships in your life right now that are wrong? When we harbor wrong relationships, we invite disaster in our lives.
In 2 Corinthians 6:14-15 we are told: "Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?"
That is a very clear biblical principle by which we make decisions about whom we are in partnership with, and marriage is certainly a partnership. The two shall become one, the Bible says, when two people are married. Therefore, it is extremely important that you never even consider marrying someone who is not a believer. You will not have the close, intimate marriage you desire. And if you think you can win that person to the Lord after marriage, think again. It rarely happens that way.
A good friend of mine married a man many years ago, and she knew he was not a believer. But she really thought that once they were married, she could influence him to accept Jesus. Years later she was still living with an unbeliever, and she forfeited the kind of marriage she really wanted because she disobeyed this clear biblical directive.
Now, for those of you who are already in that position, or perhaps you became a believer after marriage and your mate has not yet, don't ever give up hope and keep praying that your mate will accept the Lord. You can be an influence to bring that mate to Christ. But be sure that you don't allow your non-believing mate to cause you to compromise your commitment to Jesus.
If you still looking for a mate, there is a lot of discussion as to whether a Christian should date a non-Christian. You can argue that dating someone is not the same as being yoked with them, but it's step one toward it. Quite frankly, I wouldn't run any risks in this area, because once you fall for someone, you will start rationalizing and justifying that relationship. Often single people have said to me, "Well, he doesn't believe just like I do, but he believes in God." That's not enough, folks! That person you marry needs to not only be born again but share your commitment to the lordship of Jesus Christ.
Relationships are really important to us, aren't they? I think of the many wonderful relationships in my life and how those people have shaped my character and strengthened my walk with the Lord. Thank God for those relationships.
But you know, there was a period in my life when I walked away from my commitment to Jesus Christ and during that ten-year desert experience, most of the influential relationships in my life were detrimental to my spiritual life.
We need to be very, very careful about our relationships, the people around us, the people close to us, the people we listen to and try to please, because those people have enormous impact and influence in our lives and if they're the wrong people, our walk with God will suffer.
The children of Israel are good examples of how wrong relationships can be harmful. God told them that they must not associate with the idolatrous people of the other nations, because if they did, they would start to practice their evil ways. In other words, you won't bring them up to your level; they'll bring you down to theirs. And that's just what happened time and again. God's children would try to make friends with idolaters and every time they got in big trouble.
In Ezekiel 20:32 God says to his people, "You say, 'We want to be like the nations, like the peoples of the world, who serve wood and stone.'" They had surrounded themselves with the wrong people and gradually, little by little, they decided they wanted to be like their friends and associates.
Ask yourself: Do my relationships enhance my walk with God? Are there people I voluntarily spend significant time with who are influencing me to deny, or compromise, or walk away from my commitment to Jesus Christ?
Now, we know that God has not called us to be isolationists. Jesus set us an example of being a friend of sinners. But we must carefully guard ourselves against relationships that cause us to compromise or lower our standards.
Wouldn’t it be nice if we could learn everything we need to know just once, and that’s it! But life is not that way and we are all prone to forget—prone to wander from what we know—prone to do our own thing and go our own way. So, if we’re going to become spiritually mature, we have to be good at re-learning.
For example, we often need to re-learn to be content. Most of us are victims at times of looking on the other side of the fence and deciding that the grass over there sure looks greener than our grass. It just sometimes seems like our lives are painted drab gray and everybody else has bright red or yellow!
Someone once wrote: "The uncommon life is the product of the day lived in the uncommon way.” Which means that a person whose life is exciting and full is one who finds meaning and satisfaction in the seemingly insignificant, daily things in life.
Let me give you a very simple example: I have some china which I really love. And it gives me great pleasure to set my table with that china, to hold it, even to wash it. I enjoy my china. I remember once, when my daughter was a teenager, Julie found it rather strange to hear me getting excited about this china which I had owned for years.
And I said to her, "If you can find pleasure and joy in the little things in your life, your life will be full of pleasure and joy. Otherwise, it's going to be very drab most of the time, with a few high points only now and then."
Regardless of how humble and unpretentious your daily life may seem, you can elevate it if you can learn to enjoy and appreciate what you have. As the Apostle Paul says in Philippians 4:11, one needs to learn the secret of being content in any and every situation. Contentment brings meaning to our daily lives and frees us from the dreariness of looking over our fence at someone else's grass.
Have you enrolled in the school of contentment? You can begin today by appreciating the small things, smelling the roses which are in your life, instead of being focused on what you don't have and looking over the fence all the time.
Another thing high on the list of things I have to re-learn is how and when to let go. You know, there are times when we simply have to let go and turn situations over to God. Letting go does not mean that we don't care, nor that we wouldn't do whatever we could do to help the situation. It simply means that we recognize where our abilities end and where we relinquish situations to God's control.
For instance, most parents face this "let go" decision with their children. You raise your children the best you can, teaching them biblical principles, but at some point, you have to let them go. Perhaps you let them go and they make mistakes, but you know there's no other way for them to learn. You let go allowing them to make their own decisions, even if you could make better ones for them.
I answered a letter to someone who was struggling with letting go of his dream to be married. He really wanted a partner and was obsessed with that dream and just could not let go of it. You know, often we have to let our dreams go—those cherished things we've been hoping and longing for. They may be very good things, like getting married. But God often wants to know if we love him more than we love our dream. And so we have to let go. Sometimes those dreams are returned to us fulfilled later on; sometimes they are not. But until we let go, they will possess us and rob us of joy and contentment.
We have to learn to let our burdens go. Jesus has told us to turn our heavy burdens over to him and accept his light in exchange. Many feel guilty when there's a problem in their life if they aren't feeling the burden all the time. Would that describe you? But that's not the way God wants us to respond. He wants us to drop our burdens at his feet and just keep letting them go. I can tell you that I have verbally told God, "Lord, I'm dropping this right here.
How would you rate your job satisfaction? Do you like your job? Not many people do, they tell us. I really love what I do. But not because I have the world's most glamorous or exciting job. Rather it's because I know I'm where God wants me to be, doing what he wants me to do, so even the mundane things have meaning, though they are still mundane.
When I sit down to write for this program or for books, I do not find that time exhilarating; I find it hard work. I have to make myself write most of the time. I have to force the discipline on myself, or I'll get busy with all kinds of things to avoid writing. But I love to communicate, so I have to write.
Here at the offices of The Christian Working Woman, we have a small staff of three devoted women and me. So, we all have to pitch in and do all kinds of work in order to get the job done. I do some of those repetitive things myself. Lots of mundane work, but it has to be done and I can do it as well as anyone else.
Mundane aspects of work can teach us many things: humility, servanthood, persevering until the job is done. Those mundane things, done for the glory of God, can become beautiful times of worship, of singing, of staying in touch with The King of kings and Lord of lords.
I used to do a lot of business training to earn my living, and there are many aspects of that job that were not appealing to me, mostly the heavy travel. But I came to realize that God had given me work that sharpened my skills and allowed me to have time to manage this ministry. So, I learned how to put the negatives out of my mind and thank God for his goodness.
Any job can be meaningful when it is done to God's glory. It may not be fulfilling, but then we'll never find true fulfillment in any job or career. That comes only through Jesus Christ.
So, is it necessary that you have a fulfilling job? No, it's necessary that you be where God wants you to be, and then you will find fulfillment in him and meaning in your work. You will know that whatever you're doing is not without merit, does not go unnoticed by God. And when you do it as unto him, you'll discover how your attitude will change toward the job itself.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
Should one of our major goals in life be to find a job that is exciting and fulfilling? I'd like to quote from Elizabeth Elliot's book, Discipline: The Glad Surrender:
"Interest and challenge can always be found in any task done for God. If our work seems to be beneath us, if it becomes boring and meaningless, mere drudgery, it may be a living, but it is not living. It is not the life of freedom and fullness a disciple's life is designed to be. Does God ask us to do what is beneath us? This question will never trouble us again if we consider the Lord of heaven taking a towel and washing feet."
She goes on to say:
"I once heard a formula guaranteed to prevent boredom: it is to have
Something to do Someone to love Something to look forward to.
The Christian has all these in Christ: work, a Master, a hope. Yet how easily we forget this."
Whoever said the grass always looks greener on the other side knew what he or she was talking about. I believe our enemy, Satan, uses this human propensity to find an exciting job to destroy our joy. He makes us believe that if we had a different, more fulfilling job, every day would be an exciting adventure, never boring, never dull.
So, we plod away in the job we have, or expend much time and energy trying to find another one, instead of looking to God to bring meaning into whatever we do.
Now, I'm not saying it's wrong to want a different type of job, to aspire to other positions, to educate and train yourself for a job you find interesting. Certainly God has gifted each of us differently, and we are at our best when we're using our gifts appropriately.
But if you've been thinking the right job would make you happy, please think again. Only Jesus can do that. Remember, seek him first, and all these other things will be added.
I hear Christians talking about being bored and unchallenged in their jobs, wanting to find a job that fulfills them. I wonder if they are looking in the wrong place for the fulfillment and joy they want.
We looked at what Jesus said in Matthew 10:39: “Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it.”
What did he mean by that? He’s simply telling us that to find real fulfillment in life, knowing
that what you’re doing matters and God is pleased, you have to take a different path. It’s an upside down path but it’s the path Jesus says to take—to lose our lives for his sake, and in doing so we find life! We find the fulfillment that has eluded us.
Here’s a quote from a secular book written by Betty Friedan. She began the feminist movement in 1963, fighting for women to be able to hold any job they were qualified for, and when that happened, women would be set free from home to find their fulfillment. Twenty years later she candidly admitted that the search for fulfillment which women thought they would find in a job did not work. Quoting from her book:
Said the vice president of a large corporation: "For 17 years, all I've lived for is that company. Because we wanted so much to get up there, we had blinders on for everything else in life except finally making it on the board. My glamorous career! I hit some deep spiritual crisis, or something, but it wasn't satisfying to me anymore. ...It's a real spiritual crisis, when you reach that plateau and you realize you've gone as far as you can go in that company, that industry, and all those trimmings and trappings you'd been working for all these years, that's all there is."
Can't you hear the disappointment in her words? She learned that fulfillment does not come from a job, no matter how good it is. In the end, they are just jobs, sometimes repetitive and boring. Certainly not totally fulfilling.
But here's the good news: No matter what job we have, as Christians we can do it to God's glory and it therefore becomes meaningful and purposeful. I knew a woman who worked in a large bakery, doing rather repetitive work, but she viewed it as her mission field and God opened many doors for her to share the Gospel with many people, including executives in the company. She never complained about her routine job because she saw it as her opportunity to share the love of Jesus.
You can know fulfillment in the midst of a routine job if you know Jesus and you're doing your work for his glory.
Is your job fulfilling to you? Whatever you do every day, whether outside or inside your home, do you find it fulfills you and makes you feel good about yourself?
Now, here's the next question: As a Christian, is it important that we have a job that is personally fulfilling? Is that our right? Should that have a high priority in our lives?
My answer may surprise you but think it through with me. I think the whole question of fulfilling jobs and careers is a result of the humanistic thinking that pervades our society. We have been subtly led to believe that we have a right to be fulfilled, whatever that means, and that right takes precedence over all others. So, a fulfilling job—a job we like—becomes an accepted and appropriate goal.
Our thinking has been so clouded with self-actualization, self-esteem, and self-fulfillment, that we Christians have sometimes missed a basic truth of scripture: self-denial. If there's a self-fulfillment message in God's Word, I've missed it.
Now, don't turn me off yet. I'm not saying that we have to trudge through life hating what we do, martyrs for Jesus, sad-faced and depressed, because we can't be self-fulfilled. It does not mean that you can't look for a job that interest you, nor is it wrong to enjoy the job you have.
But you see, we keep getting the cart before the horse. We won't find fulfillment in jobs. I know, because I tried for a long time to make myself feel good and worthwhile through my job. I've held lots of jobs in my career, some with glamorous aspects, a good bit of recognition and success. And I'm here to tell you that not one of those jobs ever made me feel fulfilled and complete. Even at their best moments, I knew inside they were missing the mark. And every job had its share of routine and drudgery.
While Jesus came to bring us life abundant, he told us clearly that: “Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it” (Matthew 10:39). What did he mean exactly?
I read a verse in Proverbs 20 that baffled me for a while. “A person’s steps are directed by the Lord. How then can anyone understand their own way? (Proverbs 20:24). But I think I know what Solomon was trying to say to us.
Most of us spend lots of time trying to understand our own way. What will I do about this? Where will I go? What's my next move? What if this happens or that falls through? We have this desire to know exactly what the future holds, and to make certain it's the way we want it to be.
But when we are directed by the Lord, we cannot know our own way. It's one step at a time. We make the immediate move God has placed in front of us, and then he shows us the next move.
Why does God operate that way? It seems almost cruel, doesn't it? Wouldn't it be better if he said, "Now, Mary, here's my exact plan for the rest of your life.” That's what we'd like—and of course, we'd like that strategic plan to be to our liking and our choosing!
But when our steps are directed by the Lord, he gives them to us one at a time because:
It teaches us to walk by faith and not by sight. We have to trust God. And then we become strong in our faith, and that pleases God. Without faith it's impossible to please God. If God showed us our whole path, we'd try to change it and manipulate it. But God knows what is best, even if we can't see it. If we saw every step ahead in advance, we'd rebel at some of them. They would frighten us; they would look too difficult. But when God directs us one at a time, we learn little by little that if we're following him, he'll be with us and give us the strength and grace we need. He never gives us that strength ahead of time, but it's there when we need it.
I don't know what my way holds. I have goals and objectives that I'm working toward by faith. But God is ordering my steps. They may turn at any time in an unexpected direction. That's his prerogative because I'm his child and I've chosen to walk his path, not mine. But I don't have to know what tomorrow will bring—and neither do you. All we need is to know that we took the right step today, he's with us, and whatever the step is tomorrow, he'll be with us then.
I encourage you today to let God direct your steps one at a time. It's a whole lot better than trying to understand your own way. You never can, you know, no matter how much you try.
Like many other people, I spent many years "doing my own thing,” as we say, not obedient to God's voice in my life. Though God in his graciousness has turned those ashes into beauty, how I wish I had not wasted those precious years which are gone forever. As I look back with God's perspective on that time, I now recognize that the underlying problem in those ten years was that I was afraid to trust God with control of my life. Actually, fearful of allowing the God of the universe to run my show. I shake my head now and wonder how I could have been so stupid for so long.
And I look around me and see many other Christians doing the same thing. Many of you undoubtedly are hanging on to the controls of your lives, afraid to trust God, as if to say that you know what's better for you than God does, and you are more trustworthy than he is.
I'd like to try to help you see why you are afraid to trust God, in hopes that you too will let go of your own misguided thinking which is leading you toward disaster. And that you will come to know the joy and peace of a God-controlled life.
My particular fear of trusting God began when, as a single adult, I decided that the only thing that could make me happy was to find the perfect man to marry, and that the worst thing in the world would be to remain single forever. That, of course, was my first mistake. The worst thing in the world for a Christian is to be out of fellowship with God and to live a life of disobedience. But my thinking was being shaped by the culture and my own stubborn desires, not by God's principles.
So, for almost ten years I retained control of my life and all my decisions. Then, through various events that God caused or allowed in my life, I finally came to the end of my rope. I remember well the sleepless night when I finally said, "God, I'll do anything you ask of me, if only you will give me peace. I'll even be single forever.” Hesitatingly I finally exercised a little bit of faith and told God I was willing to trust him. It was obvious that he couldn't possibly do a worse job of running my life than I was doing!
That little bit of weak faith on my part was the beginning of learning to trust God. Through weeks and months of pain, as I watched my hopes and dreams die, he replaced those broken dreams with himself. And in the intervening years, I have learned to trust him more and more, and know the joy and peace of his fellowship. And I testify to you today that God is trustworthy. Furthermore, he's infinitely better at running my life than I was! And interestingly, after more than forty years of singleness—and coming to be totally content with my singleness—God had another surprise for me and a few years ago I was married to a wonderful godly man.
With hindsight, I now ask myself why I did not trust him sooner. And the answer that comes back is that I did not really understand who God is, and therefore how trustworthy he is. Though I had been taught the basics of Christianity from my earliest days and had graduated from a Christian college, the knowledge of God had somehow not gone from my head to my heart.
I want to share with you the three basic truths about God that changed my life, as I began to really understand them. They are simple beyond belief. Undoubtedly, most of you will nod your head in agreement as you hear them. But if you truly believe them, your life has to change, and those fears of trusting God have to go.
Learning to trust God begins by reminding ourselves of his character and power, and then asking ourselves if we really believe God is who he says he is. Here are just a few verses that describe the nature of God:
Isaiah 44:6-8 (NASB) tells us our God is the only God. "Thus says the Lord, the King of Israel and his Redeemer, the Lord of hosts: 'I am the first and the last, and there is no other God besides Me.'"
Verse 24 tells us that He is God the Creator: "Thus says the Lord, your Redeemer,
Do you have beautiful feet? Now, I admit that I don’t think of feet as being beautiful—certainly not my feet. But the Bible describes beautiful feet in Isaiah 52:7: How beautiful on the mountains are the feet of those who bring good news, who proclaim peace, who bring good tidings, who proclaim salvation, who say to Zion, “Your God reigns!” So, for beautiful feet we must use our feet to tell the good news that Jesus has come to bring peace and salvation; to be bold in proclaiming that our God reigns and he is Lord of heaven and earth. Wherever your feet take you each day, are you finding opportunities to bring good news and proclaim salvation? That is what makes feet beautiful.
Proverbs 4:26 says, “Make level paths for your feet and take only ways that are firm.” We are responsible for the paths that our feet take. Level paths would take us to church regularly, to fellowship with other believers, to people and places who will edify us and build us up.
I think of how easily I can choose a path of convenience, or a path of self-glory, or a path of laziness, or a path of wasted time. Those are not firm paths, but they look very inviting sometimes, don’t they?
David wrote: “My steps have held to your paths; my feet have not stumbled.” And as long as he made level paths for his feet, that was true. However, on one occasion he chose a wrong path—the path of adultery. His commitment to keep his feet from stumbling was overcome by his passion and his feet stumbled. And the consequences of that wrong path were devastating for David and his family.
Proverbs 4:26-27 is a warning written by David’s son, Solomon: Give careful thought to the paths for your feet and be steadfast in all your ways. Do not turn to the right or the left; keep your foot from evil. And the word of God must be the lamp to our feet and the light for our path. I encourage you to make sure your feet are beautiful, that they stay on the right path, and they bring good news to the people in your world.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
If I said, “I’m going to have a mani,” would you know what I meant? I think most of us women would know the shorthand we use for manicures. That’s what we do to keep our hands looking good. Well, as your beauty consultant with beauty tips from the Bible, I want to tell you how you can keep your hands really beautiful.
Psalm 24:3-5a says, “Who may ascend the mountain of the Lord? Who may stand in his holy place? The one who has clean hands and a pure heart, who does not trust in an idol or swear by a false god. They will receive blessing from the Lord.”
As parents we had to frequently remind our children to wash their hands because dirty hands carry germs and cause illness. That has been driven home during this pandemic, hasn’t it? Well, the same is true for us spiritually; we need to frequently “wash our hands” and make sure that we keep our hearts pure. You do that by confessing your sins willingly and regularly, keeping short accounts with the Lord, so that your heart is pure.
Beautiful hands are hands that reach out to help others. In describing the ideal woman, Proverbs 31:20 says, “She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy.” Throughout scripture again and again we are told to take care of the poor and the orphan, the widow and the oppressed. Hands that help those who are needy are the most beautiful hands. Do your hands reach out to help the poor and needy?
Beautiful hands are busy hands. Proverbs 12:24 says that “Diligent hands will rule, but laziness ends in slave labor.” The Bible further says, “Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might” (Ecclesiastes 9:10a).
And lastly, our hands should be used to praise the Lord. Psalm 47:1: “Clap your hands, all you nations; shout to God with cries of joy.” And Psalm 134:2: “Lift up your hands in the sanctuary and praise the Lord.” Paul wrote to young Timothy: “I want men everywhere to lift up holy hands in prayer, without anger or disputing.” Our hands should be used to praise the Lord.
Would you like a really good beauty tip? These are biblical beauty tips, so you know they really work.
This beauty tip concerns your posture. I can remember as a teenager my mom often telling me, “Mary, stand up straight!” She recognized how important posture is in how people see you. If you walk or sit with your shoulders straight and your head held high, you definitely present a much more attractive appearance.
Well, what should our posture be as God’s people? We need to stand up straight and firm on the sure foundation of God’s Word. That means, of course, we have to continually be learning truth from God’s Word through Bible study. Are you involved in some kind of intentional, focused study of God’s Word, either on your own or in a small group? If not, why not? If you are a disciple of Jesus Christ, there really can’t be a good excuse for not studying the Bible.
A Christian’s posture should be one of standing firm because of what Christ has done for us. One of my favorite passages is Psalm 40:2-3: “He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear and put their trust in the Lord.” You know, when you’ve been taken out of the world’s slimy pit and given a firm place to stand, your posture should be one of praise and joy, and as a result many should recognize what God has done for you.
A Christian’s posture should be one of standing straight and firm even when life is hard. Proverbs 10:25 says, “When the storm has swept by, the wicked are gone, but the righteous stand firm forever.” Do you have a posture of standing firm in the midst of life’s storms?
Make sure you have good posture: Stand firm in your faith; let nothing move you. Remember: “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery” (Galatians 5:1).
I am your beauty consultant. That is, if you’re looking for tips on what makes a person really beautiful. I have a beauty tip for your eyes.
Jesus said, “The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are healthy, your whole body will be full of light. But if your eyes are unhealthy, your whole body will be full of darkness” (Matthew 6:22-23a). Jesus uses an obvious illustration about eyes to explain the importance of spiritual eyesight. When our physical eyes function properly, we can see whatever is visible. But poor eyesight means that images are distorted and we are seeing the world around us with poor perception.
The kind of beautiful eyes we need are what I call “Forever Eyes,” the ability to see our circumstances, our worlds, and the people in our worlds from an eternal perspective. When our eyes are Forever Eyes, they make our whole body bright. This kind of eyesight helps you see people the way Jesus sees them, enables you to be compassionate and loving toward others because you see them through Forever Eyes. It gives you a right perspective of the circumstances of your life, and keeps you from being obsessed by things that don’t really matter.
I well remember a time when I worked for a difficult manager and I just kept trying to get out of that job. Finally God made it clear that he had me there, working for that difficult person, for a reason. God wanted to change me! So, for the first time I began to pray that God would help me see this man the way God saw him—to see him through Forever Eyes. I have to tell you that changing the focus of my eyes changed me overnight, and from that day forward I was able to have compassion for this man.
Beautiful eyes are those that see from God’s perspective rather than from a selfish one. How do you get Forever Eyes? You pray them on each day. For those of us who wear glasses or contacts, we have to put them on each day in order to see clearly. Well, the same is true for Forever Eyes. Each morning you pray for God to give you Forever Eyes for that day.
Paul wrote to the Ephesians 1:18a: “I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you. . .” That’s a good way to start your day. Pray that the eyes of your heart will be enlightened so you can see through God’s eyes. Then, I promise, you will have beautiful eyes!
I wonder how many books and articles have been written on how to be beautiful, how to stay young, how to look good? It’s a topic most of us care about. I want to give you some beauty tips—and this is for men as well as women. These are guaranteed to improve how you look to others.
First, let’s talk about beauty tips for your lips. For years I have prayed David’s prayer in Psalm 141:3: “Set a guard over my mouth, Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips.” I visualize two guards—one on each side of my mouth—keeping watch over what comes out of my lips.
If you want to really improve how you look to others, start by guarding the words that come out of your lips. I find that I must be intentional about this; I must be aware of what I say and I must consciously remember to speak words of encouragement and kindness.
Here are some guidelines I try to remember:
If you think something complimentary or encouraging about someone, speak what you’re thinking. Whether it’s a stranger or the person dearest to you, be sure to speak the kind words you think. Recently I was eating in a busy fast-food place, and I noticed one woman who was outstanding in her attitude and service to the customers. I just made it a point to tell her how impressed I was with her. Why not? She deserved those words of encouragement. But don’t forget those closest to you—like your children, or your mate, or your co-workers. They need to hear kind words, too. Don’t speak words that don’t have to be spoken. Proverbs 17:27a tells us that one who has knowledge uses words with restraint. In other words, if you’re smart, you won’t talk too much. I often remind myself that I don’t have to say everything I’m thinking! Speak words of praise to God out loud anytime you can. Let your ears hear words of praise coming from your lips. In Psalm 119:171a the Psalmist says, “May my lips overflow with praise.” When your lips overflow with praise, they are beautiful lips! And this is one way to encourage yourself. Speak words of praise, even if your heart is heavy. It will make a difference.
So, my first beauty tip is to make your lips beautiful by speaking words of life. Words are the fruit of your lips, so “let us continually offer to God a sacrifice of praise—the fruit of lips that openly profess his name” (Hebrews 13:15).
A promise a day keeps the devil away—I believe that is true. So here are seven promises to get you started for the week ahead—a week where you can know victory over all the onslaughts that the enemy throws your way. Then you can easily find seven more and keep doing this each week.
Our promise for Sunday is Isaiah 54:10: “Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed,” says the Lord, who has compassion on you. Seems like this year behind us has shaken our foundations, doesn’t it? Our normal lives have been turned upside down, and we don’t know even yet what our new normal is going to look like. Many of our freedoms have been taken from us, and we’ve been isolated and frightened a lot. Sure feels like our mountains are shaking and the hills we once knew and loved have been removed.
Could that be where you are? Well, here’s God’s promise for you for Sunday: His unfailing love has not been and never will be shaken and nothing or no one can take his peace from you. The Lord, the Creator of the universe, has compassion on you. Claim it because it is true. It is his promise to you and his promises never fail. For no matter how many promises God has made, they are “Yes” in Christ, as we read in 2 Corinthians 1:20.
Here’s your promise for Monday: 2 Thessalonians 3:3: But the Lord is faithful, and he will strengthen you and protect you from the evil one. I said that a promise a day would keep the devil away, right? So, here is the promise you can claim for protection from the evil one. The Lord will strengthen you.
Do you feel like your strength is about gone? Maybe you’ve been defeated lately by some temptation, some sin, and time and again your good intentions to resist the devil have just failed you. Here’s your promise for Monday: The Lord is faithful and he will give you the strength and will protect you from the evil one. You’ve failed because you don’t have the strength in yourself—none of us do. So, just claim this promise: God you are faithful; please strengthen me and protect me from all those arrows that the devil keeps sending my way. Take this promise with you on Monday; quote it and claim it. It’s there for you.
But what about Tuesday? Is there a promise for you on Tuesday? Absolutely: Deuteronomy 31:6: Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Fear is usually at the root of most of our concerns, is it not? That’s why over and over and over in scripture God says to his people, to you and me, “Do not be afraid.” He speaks to us as a loving parent whose child is afraid of the dark. That parent knows there is no need for fear, but she also knows that her child is nonetheless afraid of it. So, she says with all tenderness and care, “Don’t be afraid.”
Well, you have a heavenly Father who speaks to you in his compassion and love for you: There’s no need for you to be afraid. I’m going with you. I will always be with you. Nothing can separate you from me. Be strong; don’t be afraid. What are you facing that has you gripped by fear? Who has terrified you by lies and threats? On this day claim this promise—you are not alone, never ever. And if the Lord is for you, who can be against you? You have every reason to be strong and courageous because you have this promise from the true God, the only God. Take it as yours.
Now you’re at mid-week, Wednesday. Sometimes Wednesdays seem interminable, don’t they? The weekend seems a long way off, and the doldrums set in. You need a promise for Wednesday, and here it is from Isaiah 58:11: The Lord will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail. Even in your dry moments, even on those days when your spirits are low and you are ...
The Bible says words aptly spoken are like apples of gold in settings of silver (Proverbs 25:11). If I had a silver bowl full of gold apples, not only would it be a thing of great beauty, but obviously one of very great value, too. There is great power in our words to do wonderful, beautiful things. And one way is through timely words—aptly spoken words. They are delightful.
What is a timely word? That's when you say something to someone at just the right moment. How often people have done this for me. I'll be having some discouragement or doubts, and someone will call or say to me a word that simply delights my heart and picks me right out of the dumps. You've had that happen to you. Just when you feel like you look terrible, someone says, "Wow, you really look nice today.” Just when you feel like a failure, you hear, "That was a terrific job you did.” And just those few words can turn you completely around.
One principle I taught managers was, "Try to catch your employees doing something right—and the minute you do, tell them.” That's a timely word, and it can do more for morale and productivity than any other management technique you can learn. Try it on someone. Catch them doing something right, and tell them immediately.
Words of encouragement are beautiful as well. Can you think of someone who needs encouragement today? Take the time to give them that aptly spoken word of encouragement
When someone is suffering, you may not have any great words of wisdom, but you can always say, "I'm so sorry. I know how it hurts.” Frequently, a sympathetic word—simply hurting with those who are hurting—is just what that person needs.
Well, the Bible sure has a lot to say about the words we speak. And there's no question that we have the power of life and death in our tongues. I want to challenge you to join me in determining, by God's grace, to use your tongue to bring life and not death, to yourself and to others. What a testimony that would be! Why should we settle for anything less? Let's go for it.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
The Bible tells us that the power of life and death is in the tongue. Why, then, don't we use it for life instead of for death? I believe that we as Christians, more than anyone else, should be very careful that we are not speaking words that hurt others or ourselves.
I’ve talked about the bad things that happen when we speak the wrong words, and how our words can inflict great damage on others as well as ourselves. Here are some of the good things we can do with words. By avoiding deadly words and speaking words that have life in them, our words can do wonderful things for others as well as ourselves.
Consider Proverbs 15:1a: A gentle answer turns away wrath. If you speak with gentle words, you can dissipate someone else's wrath. I remember a public service ad on television depicting parents saying awful things to their children. Such things as I'm sorry you were ever born. You'll never amount to anything. You can't do anything right. You're nothing but trouble. The ad made the point that as parents we need to be careful what we say to our children, because our words will shape them into the people they become.
It's true for parents and everyone else; our words shape how others behave. So often managers get the wrong reaction out of their people and demotivate them by their poor choice of words.
Did you know that your tongue has healing powers? Proverbs 12:18b says that the tongue of the wise brings healing, and in chapter 16:24 we read, "Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones."
Your own pleasant words can bring healing to your own soul and bones. And they can bring healing to others, too. How? Well, pleasant words can surely heal wounds of bitterness and broken relationships. Often physical problems have their beginnings in the mind and the emotions. And many times those problems began with either the wrong spoken words or the absence of needed words.
Well, we can't do anything about the words we've already spoken, but we surely can, by God's grace, start to control our words now so that we're speaking words of life, not death.
Have you ever thought about the damage that you do yourself by the words you use? You may be surprised to see just how your life has been affected by your own words.
I have noticed that I can make myself truly exhausted by saying out loud, "Wow, I'm really tired.” So often I hear people talk themselves out of doing something good by citing all the reasons it can't be done, instead of finding ways to make it happen. Many of us limit our potential and ourselves by saying "I can't" instead of "I'll try.” We talk ourselves into emotional depression by talking about our troubles instead of reciting all we have to be thankful for.
We're frequently victims of our own words. We speak words of doom and they become self-fulfilling prophecies. My friend, I want to tell you something: the words you are saying are having a great influence on your attitude, your productivity, your motivation, your self-respect.
I was talking with someone who said she was due to have a review by her boss the next week, and he had promised her a raise, but she didn't think she'd get it. He wouldn't come through, she was sure.
I wanted to say to her, "Don't even say that!” Why? Because she's wounding herself with her own words. If she keeps saying that, she'll believe that her boss is not going to fulfill his promise to her. Do you think that might affect her performance? Good chance. Do you think her boss might pick up on that attitude? Good chance. Her words of fear and doubt could very well trigger the results she fears. Then if she doesn't get the raise, she'll say, "See, I knew it.” And then there will be more negative words to feed back into her mental computer and the problem will compound itself.
Are you speaking words of doom to yourself? Words like "I can't do it," or "I'm really afraid," or "I know something bad is going to happen"? Do you frequently say "I'm so tired," or "I just don't feel good today," or "I'm getting a headache again"? It could be that you are doing great damage to yourself by filling your mind with your own negative, harmful words of doom.
Listen to yourself talk and stop wounding yourself with words of death.
Undoubtedly you know someone who just cannot stop talking—just a real motor mouth. We all know people like that. Do you like to be with them? Probably not that much. But talking too much is more than just an irritating bad habit. We need to see what God has to say about talking too much.
Proverbs 17:27 says a man of knowledge uses words with restraint, and a few verses later it tells us that a fool delights in airing his own opinions, and that it is shameful for a person to answer before listening.
How much do you talk versus how much you listen? James tells us to be quick to listen and slow to speak, but if you're like me, you may find it much easier to be quick to speak and slow to listen! Do you think God is sending us a message by giving us two ears and one mouth, telling us that we need to listen twice as much as we talk?
Proverbs 20:19 says to avoid a person who talks too much. Why? Because they're shooting off their deadly weapon all the time, and you could get hit. Abundance of words leads to sin. Proverbs 10:19 says when words are many, sin is not absent. Have you noticed that if you just keep talking long enough, pretty soon you'll say something you shouldn't? Do you have a reputation for talking all the time? Then chances are you say much that is inappropriate, because many words lead to sin.
In Matthew 12:36 Jesus said, "But I tell you that everyone will have to give account on the day of judgment for every empty word they have spoken.” Think about giving an account for all your careless words. Little scary, isn't it? Talking too much is not a laughing matter, or just an irritating bad habit, but rather something we should take quite seriously.
WORDS! They are very powerful things. Sticks and stones may break our bones, but words can do far more harm than a few broken bones. You know, once you speak words, you can never un-speak them. You can erase with a pencil or delete from your computer, but once those words are spoken, they cannot be unsaid.
It's really difficult to heal the damage done by careless words, so check it out and eliminate some of those excess, unnecessary words that so frequently get you into trouble.
You've heard the jingle: "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” Well, don't believe it—not for a minute. Words can do more damage than sticks and stones could ever inflict. Words have power.
Did you ever think that we all carry a loaded weapon with us every day—an instrument that can be used to destroy and injure others as well as ourselves? We do and it is our tongues. In James we read that the tongue is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. I'm sure you can remember words spoken to you years ago that hurt deeply, so deeply that the memory brings the pain back as though the words were just spoken.
The Bible has a lot to say about how words can deliver deathblows. Here are some examples.
Harsh words - Proverbs 15:1 says harsh words stir up anger. Harsh words may simply be the tone of voice we use, more than the actual words we say, and they can hurt very much.
Gossip - Proverbs 17:9 says gossip (repeating a matter) separates intimate friends. We may try to camouflage gossip or justify it, but words of gossip carry enormous potential for harm and damage.
Here's another bit of ammunition that comes from our mouths—quarrelling. Proverbs 20:3 says that any fool will quarrel, but we're told to abandon the quarrel before it breaks out. Ever notice how people say such hateful things when they're angry, things they don't even mean, but once those words are said, the damage is done!
Hasty words - Proverbs 29:20 says that a person who speaks in haste has less hope than a fool does. Words spoken in haste are very frequently the wrong words. We need to think before we speak.
Lying is another way to injure with words. Today lying is quite acceptable—indeed a skill to be admired in many environments. The Bible, however, gives strong condemnation to liars. And there's no such thing as a white lie. When we lie, we speak words that harm.
Oh, there's no question about it. We all have the ability to inflict great amounts of pain and suffering by using inappropriate words. We truly need to seriously consider the impact of our words on others.
"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us” (Hebrews 12:1) I truly believe that one of the main sins that hinders and entangles us is self-pity. And I think it's one we don't easily recognize, because when we are wallowing in self-pity, we feel justified. After all, something has happened to cause us to feel that we have a right to feel sorry for ourselves, so it's difficult for us to see self-pity as a tool that Satan uses to hinder us.
The other thing I've noticed about self-pity is that although we are miserable at these pity parties, they hold some kind of weird fascination for us. We seem to love the misery and are reluctant to walk out of our pity parties, because we feel justified in our self-pity, and since usually nobody else is feeling sorry for us, we have to do it ourselves!
Pity parties are pitiful, and I want to do everything I can to convince you that every time you throw one of these affairs, you damage your witness for Jesus, and you do yourself a great disservice.
Here are some of the usual outcomes of pity parties:
Almost always, pity parties cause us to waste time. Not only do pity parties waste our time, they also waste our energy. Self-pity just drains you. Have you noticed this? When you throw a pity party, your imagination runs wild. And in that over-reaction, what often happens is that relationships are damaged. When we have pity parties, one thing is certain: we are self-centered. Another inevitable result of self-pity is that it affects our performance.
I want to focus on the cure for self-pity. Here are six ways to avoid pity parties:
Change your attitude about pity parties.
I hope that you will get really fed up with pity parties, as you see how much damage they are doing to you and to everyone around you. Just get good and mad at the enemy who has used this weapon against you time and again. Ask God to give you holy anger about pity parties, to see them as he sees them, and to get sick and tired of feeling sorry for yourself.
I truly believe we must have a change of attitude toward self-pity and keep telling ourselves: "Pity parties are pitiful.” A smart person is not going to allow herself or himself to be swallowed up in self-pity. A godly person is not going to keep falling for this trick of the enemy. 2. Refuse to think about the bad reports; think only about the good reports! In Philippians 4:8 we are told what to think about, which also means we are told what not to think about. And that verse tells us to think about things that are of a good report. Wouldn't that also say don't think about the bad reports?
Usually when we are having a pity party, we are thinking about some bad report. It has helped me greatly to tell myself over and over again, when I'm tempted to feel sorry for myself, "Mary, stop thinking about the bad reports. Think about some good reports.” I often start reading the emails from our listeners, which helps me focus on the good things God is doing though our ministry. Those good reports will break up a pity party fast. 3. Resist the enemy who is trying to entangle you and hinder you by making you feel sorry for yourself. Just say to the enemy, out loud if possible, "Sorry, but I'm not having a pity party today so take off the party hat and go find someone else. I refuse to feel sorry for myself. I don't have time and I'm not wasting that energy.” The Bible tells us that if we resist the enemy, he will flee from us. 4. Think about Jesus and all that he endured. Hebrews 12:2 says "Let us fix our eyes on Jesus...” By a set of your will, stop thinking about “poor me” and think about Jesus—fix your eyes on him. Think about how he suffered such awful indignity and pain for you, and you will be embarrassed to feel sorry for yourself when you compare your si...
Does the Bible give dress standards for Christians? That's an issue we've been looking at through the eyes of our friend, Fran. She has had to face her attitude toward what she wears, and her new suit that has a very short skirt, has brought this issue to the forefront.
After some anger and exasperation, Fran has come to understand that this is a control issue with her and the Lord. Finally, she has been willing to admit that Jesus is the Lord of her life, and therefore he has a right to set her standards of dress.
At lunch with her boss this Monday, Marilyn comments on her new suit. "That's really a beautiful suit, Fran. You looked good for your presentation this morning; I bet they were impressed."
"Well, I hope so, but I was nervous," Fran replies.
"Nervous? Why?" Marilyn asks.
"Well, not about my presentation but about my skirt. It's just too short," Fran says. Marilyn looks at her with a quizzical expression.
“That’s the way skirts are these days,” Marilyn replies.
"I know, I know," she says, "but that doesn’t make it right.” Marilyn has become a believer in Christ through Fran’s witness, and Fran has become a mentor to her as a new believer. Fran continues, “You see, as a woman of God, we do have a responsibility to dress with modesty and that means go the extra mile to be certain we always make a modest impression."
Marilyn puts her fork down. "You mean as Christians we can’t wear fashionable clothes?"
"No, not at all,” Fran laughs. “It just means our standard is to dress with modesty. It can be fashionable, but it also needs to be modest.”
“Well, for sure the clothes women are wearing today are so tight and revealing—I mean, I’m embarrassed at how some of the women dress around here,” Marilyn says.
“We just have to remember, Marilyn, that we are not to be conformed to this world and it’s fashion standards. We represent Jesus to the people around us and we have to be willing to dress by his standards, not what’s fashionable,” Fran says. “Guess I’ll be looking for a short woman to give this suit to.”
“Really?” Marilyn says.
“Yeah, it’s not worth it, Marilyn,” Fran says. “It’s far more important for me to please Jesus than it is to wear the latest fashion.”
Well, what do you think? It is a personal issue for each woman to settle with the Lord, but there are certainly some strong principles in scripture to guide us. Remember what Fran learned: Obedience is the best way to live.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
Today Fran has just completed a presentation to a new client, but throughout the whole morning she was very conscious that her skirt was short, perhaps too short. Her conscience is bothering her over this because the Spirit of God convicted her about it this morning and she became defensive. Now her friend Louise has seemed to agree that the skirt is on the short side, though she told Fran that it’s an issue between Fran and Jesus.
Fran is thinking that over as she sits in her office. She finally decides to talk to Jesus about it, "Lord, why am I so defensive about this? Why does it bug me that I can't dress like everyone else?"
"Could it be,” Jesus says, “that this comes down to an issue of control? Who is in control of your life?"
"Lord,” Fran says, “you think that this is all about having control over what I'm going to wear? I mean, is my new suit such a disgrace—really? It’s just a professional suit and honestly, I think it’s really nice.”
“But” Jesus says, “have you thought about this? Even though you’re wearing the suit you chose—with the short skirt, it is not bringing you any joy or pleasure, is it?”
She thinks about how she felt all through her meeting this morning, how uncomfortable she was. She realizes how much emotional energy she has wasted on this whole question. "You’re right, Lord," she quietly responds, "it seems to be causing me a lot of unnecessary turmoil."
Well, Fran, I’ll just quietly remind you of what we’ve talked about before," Jesus says, “Obedience is the easy way out."
“I know, Lord,” Fran agrees. She begins to think about her relationship with her own children. “When they obey me, it is for their good. But they just want their own way sometimes, and that's basically what's happening to me over this issue. I want my own way," she admits to herself.
"And I'm behaving like a child," Fran smiles. "I get it, Lord; I get it. You have my permission to set my dress standards and I will obey."
You know, I think Fran has learned a good lesson, and that is, when we insist on having control in any area in our lives, we are not only displeasing the Lord but we're making our lives miserable.
Should Christian women have a unique dress standard? This is certainly a topic on which we can find a great deal of disagreement, I'm sure. But I keep reminding myself that my opinion or someone else's opinion can be dead wrong. I need to know what the Bible has to say.
In 1 Timothy 2:9a Paul wrote: "I also want women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety. . .” So, there is our guideline. But the differences arise over our definition of dressing modestly and decently. How can we know where to draw the line?
Well, Fran is struggling a bit with that issue. It began on Sunday when the soloist at church wore a short skirt and a tight top. She thought that was inappropriate for singing at church, but does that apply to how she dresses for work?
Today, Monday, Fran is wearing a new suit to work, and this skirt is about as short as the soloist's at church. So, Fran is feeling some guilt, and then feeling angry that she has to feel guilty about wearing a fashionable suit. She leaves for work in a defensive, confused huff.
As she arrives at the office, she has a few minutes to get ready for her presentation. The client arrives and after everyone is settled in the conference room, Fran begins. She does her usual first-class job, and the client is impressed. She sits down next to the President and he begins asking her some further questions. Fran notices that she keeps tugging at her skirt. She seems to be continually aware of how short it is—and how much shorter it is when she is sitting than when she is standing.
Was the client noticing as well? Sure seems like it to Fran. Fran feels that nagging sense of guilt—that distance between her and Jesus because of disobedience. But then she thinks, "What have I done that's so wrong? I just bought a nice suit and wore it."
After the presentation, she goes back to her office and slumps in her chair. Her friend Louise pops in shortly afterwards. "What's the matter? Didn't your presentation go okay?"
Fran looks up. "Yeah, I think it went fine. But. . .well. . .listen, tell me what you think: Is this skirt too short?” Fran stands up and turns around for Louise to observe.
"Oh, it's a gorgeous suit, Fran. I love that color on you," Louise replies.
"C'mon, Louise, tell me, is it too short?” Fran insists.
"Well, it's no shorter than anybody else's," Louise hedges.
"But too short for me, is that what you're saying?" Fran asks.
"That's not for me to say, Fran," Louise says. "That's between you and the Lord.”
Well, what do you think? Is Fran's skirt too short? Is this really a spiritual issue between her and the Lord?
Is it wrong for a Christian to dress fashionably? This topic has come up between Fran and her friends, Jeff and Lois.
They attended church together yesterday and after lunch a conversation ensued about the young woman who sang a solo. While Fran thought her outfit was a bit too short and somewhat distracting while she sang, she attributed it to today's fashion scene. However, Jeff made a comment that it was hard for a man to keep his mind on worship when a woman was on the platform dressed like that.
After Lois and Jeff left that afternoon, Fran gave it some more thought. “Women are not responsible for how men think,” she says out loud to herself. “They can’t blame us just because their minds wander so easily.” And she begins to feel a bit defensive about this Christian dress code idea.
Now it's Monday morning and Fran decides to wear her new midnight blue suit. She loves it and she has an important presentation today, so it's a good time to break it in. And as she puts it on, she feels really—well—really pretty. As she zips up the skirt, her eye catches her reflection in the mirror. She realizes her new skirt is as short as the soloist's in church yesterday.
That same uneasy feeling comes over her. "Fran, if her skirt was too short, what about yours?" That still, quiet voice is clear in her head.
"Lord," Fran feels defensive, "it's impossible to find anything these days that isn't short. Besides, this is not nearly as short as some of them. What's wrong with it anyway? I mean, what's wrong with legs? We all have them!"
Fran’s reaction is a clear indication that she is convicted and trying to defend herself. She knows her reaction is wrong. However, she is not ready to admit defeat.
She remembers what Lois said—about godly women having higher standards of dress than other women. That doesn’t sit well with Fran.
"I don’t think just because you're a Christian woman, you have to wear skirts to the floor and collars to your neck and look like a Pilgrim!” she hears herself say.
Fran recognizes that her reaction and the anger she feels about this issue is a sure indication that she’s under conviction from God’s Spirit. She knows she needs to take a step back and rethink all this, because when her spirit is this disturbed, something’s wrong.
But it’s time to go to work so, she heads for the car with the kids. This whole issue of how a woman should dress really upsets her. Why? she wonders to herself. Why am I so bent out of shape over this?
It's time to once again catch up with our friend, Fran, to find out how things are in her life. Periodically I continue this ongoing story of a fictional woman named Fran who is learning how to practice the presence of Jesus in her everyday life. Fran has been through a lot—the death of her husband, going back to work, struggling with many issues as a single working mom.
Today Fran is in church, as she is each Sunday, with a couple who is visiting her from out of town. She has known Lois and Jeff for many years and is glad their friendship has continued even after Jim’s death.
Just before the pastor's sermon, a young woman gets up to sing a solo. She has a lovely voice and the music is well done. But Fran can't help noticing how inappropriately dressed she is for a church service, particularly because she is on the platform. Her skirt is short, her top is tight—it just doesn’t seem appropriate. In fact, Fran is embarrassed by it, and so she just looks down at her bulletin.
After church, they go back to her home for Sunday lunch, and with the kids outside playing, she has some leisurely time with Jeff and Lois. Jeff says, “I really enjoyed your pastor’s sermon, Fran. I can see why you like your church.”
“Thanks, Jeff,” Fran replies. “That was the first time I’ve heard that soloist. I think she’s new in the church. I also think she needs some coaching about appropriate dress for church.”
Lois remarks, “You know, in our church we finally had to establish a dress code for anyone taking part in the service. It became a real issue. So now, the rules are that if you’re on the platform for any reason, women must wear skirts below the knee or dress pants and no tight clothing. And men must wear dress pants—no blue jeans. Some people objected, but it was getting out of control.”
“I like that idea,” Fran says. “I mean, we should have some respect for the Lord’s house and a worship service.”
Jeff remarks, "Speaking for men, I find it difficult to stay focused on worship when a woman is dressed—well—like that girl today.”
“I noticed you kept your head down, Jeff,” Fran says.
“Well,” he replies, “I find the best solution is just don’t look.”
“But you know,” Fran says, “that’s the fashion today. Everywhere you shop that’s what you see.”
Lois replies, “But women of God are called to higher standards, don’t you agree?”
What do you think?
We all love parties—those festive occasions when we celebrate something special. But have you ever planned a party that turned out to be a bust? Nobody showed up or the food was terrible or a fight broke out? Well, if you've ever had a pity party, then you know how miserable they can be. Pity parties are pitiful!
Read this passage from Hebrews 12:1: "Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us." It dawned on me that one of the most common things that hinders and entangles believers and keeps us from running our race is self-pity. I believe the enemy has this flaming arrow honed to perfection, and many of us are very vulnerable to self-pity.
For example, often single people throw pity parties because they're not married. Or how about those times we've felt sorry for ourselves because we received unfair treatment on our jobs. And then there's this famous reason for a pity party: We were accused of something of which we were not guilty.
And I think we've had a few pity parties because we didn't get the credit we think we deserved. Or would you admit with me that you've thrown a pity party or two because someone said something that hurt your feelings? It really doesn't take much for us to get a pity party going! Any flimsy excuse will do!
Think of how the enemy uses self-pity in our lives. When we are feeling sorry for ourselves, what are some of the usual outcomes?
Almost always, pity parties cause us to waste time. Now, just think about it: When you're feeling sorry for yourself, you usually waste a lot of time thinking about how you've been wronged, how you don't deserve what's happened to you, how bad things are. Pity parties take a lot of time away from other important activities.
I remember years ago getting home one evening and I was sorely tempted to throw a pity party because my boss had hurt my feelings that day. I had planned to get some work done that night, but instead I started to feel sorry for myself. I sat down in my favorite chair and decided, "I'm not going to do anything tonight; I have a right to just do nothing. After all, I really have it hard at work.” Then it dawned on me what was happening: The enemy was trying to keep me from doing profitable things by tempting me to throw a pity party. So, I said—out loud—to the enemy, "Not tonight; no sir, I'm not throwing a pity party tonight.” And I just refused to wallow in that self-pity. Believe me, that was a change in the way I had often dealt with hurt feelings. But I just wasn't going to let the enemy waste my time through a pity party. And it was a major change point in my life, because it was the first time I realized that I can refuse to throw a pity party if I choose to. And I remember thinking that I just didn’t want to be miserable. 2. Not only do pity parties waste our time, they also waste our energy. Self-pity just drains you. It is, of course, a very emotional reaction, and you spend a lot of emotional energy when you are feeling sorry for yourself. That means you don't have energy for other things that are important. So, again, pity parties keep you from doing what you should do because you don't have any energy left after throwing that pity party. 3. Have you noticed this? When you throw a pity party, your imagination runs wild. You start thinking about what someone has done or what has happened, and it grows in importance. In your mind it becomes a lot worse than it really is. You lose your perspective. That, of course, causes you to over-react to it. 4. And in that over-reaction, what often happens is that relationships are damaged. When feelings are hurt and we're feeling sorry for ourselves, we often say and do things that hurt others. And because we've lost our perspective, we say and do things we really will regret later on.
One of the most important challenges you face each day is how are you going to spend those twenty-four hours? Will you be able to look back and say, “Well done” as you recognize that you truly implemented good time management principles that day?
This is time management principle number five:
- Time Management and motivation go hand in hand.
They feed off of each other. Here’s how that works. When you are managing your time effectively, getting things done and enjoying the results, it motivates you to keep on managing time well, to improve your time management skills. And isn’t it also true that when you’re really motivated to get a job done, you do a much better job of managing your time.
I’ve learned in my own life that when I get one discipline going well, it motivates me to put other disciplines in place because I am benefiting from the fruit of being disciplined. So, the discipline of time management will feed your motivation to get things done, reach some of your goals and realize the satisfaction that comes when you do. Time management and motivation go hand in hand.
I often talk about going back to the basics, and as a Christ-follower, a basic is that you need to spend regular and quality time getting to know God better and better—through time in his Word and prayer, fellowship and worship. It’s a basic that will never change and nothing can replace it. The same is true with this basic of time management. No matter how good your skills are, how smart you are, how talented you are, if you don’t learn to be a good time manager, you’ll never enjoy the full scope of what God has created you to do. I encourage you to keep these five principles we’ve talked about in mind:
Time management is about balance and prioritization. Time management is about getting the right stuff done. It is essential for your success. It is learning to be present in the moment. Time management and motivation go hand in hand.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
Do you know someone that never seems to be with you even when he or she is with you? It’s a bit disconcerting, isn’t it?
I’ve been sharing five principles of time management—attitudes toward the value of your time and managing it well and here is principle number four:
- Time management is being present in the moment.
Here’s what I mean. If you’re in a meeting or a conversation with others, whether business or personal, and you’re paying attention and focused on what’s being said or decided or asked, that means that you’re making good use of that time.
I think of a Pastor in my church who has many responsibilities—many balls in the air all the time. But when I’m in a meeting with him, discussing whatever issues I need to have his input, he is totally with me in that conversation, for however long we need. He is present in the moment, as though this is the most important thing on his calendar for that day—which it probably is not!
Another friend on the board of The Christian Working Woman is a very successful lawyer with that same wonderful characteristic. Steve is totally present in the moment, never letting his mind go to other issues while he’s talking to you. No doubt that is a trait that has contributed to his success, but it also is a time-saving habit. You eliminate mis-communication, additional conversations, and other time-consuming things because you’re present in the moment
This is an attitude that we can all develop. It does not come naturally for me but I’m becoming more and more aware of its importance, and therefore more intentional about being present in the moment with the people in my life. It not only will save you time it will improve your relationships. It’s a dynamite characteristic to develop.
In Ecclesiastes wise Solomon wrote: Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with your might (Ecclesiastes 9:10a). Do what is right and do it to the very best of your ability. Have you ever prayed about being a better time manager? Why not? As you ask for help, the Holy Spirit will bring things to your mind throughout your day—reminding you of the importance of managing your time wisely. It makes a difference for now and for eternity.
If you had to grade yourself on your time management skills, would you come in at A plus or closer to a D or F? I think most of us have heard a lot about time management techniques—whether it’s using our smart phones, or a calendar, or a to-do list or some other method. But you know, the method you choose is not the most important factor in your ability to manage your time well. It’s your commitment to managing your time that is the key.
Jesus once said to his disciples, “Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them” (John 13:17). The blessing comes in the doing, not the knowing. So, knowing the techniques of time management is only effective if you implement them consistently. These principles are not focused on techniques, but rather on your attitude and commitment toward being a really good manager of your time.
Here’s another principle:
- Time Management is essential for your success.
Well, yes, you’re probably thinking—everybody knows that. That’s probably true—that everybody knows that principle—but if you consider how many people implement and practice really good time management, I think you’ll realize that there’s often a lot of talk but not a lot of action. And so I would ask you, do you really understand that the way you manage your time is a key factor in your success—or your lack of success?
You can define success in whatever terms you wish—whether it’s business success or spiritual success or relationship success or whatever—and this principle will hold true. You will be successful in reaching your personal goals to a large degree on how well you manage your time; how disciplined you are to stick to your time management commitment.
That doesn’t mean that you are a workaholic. Really good time managers have time for recreation and celebration. Good time managers also know that it is crucial to switch off at the end of the day and leave work behind—that there have to be boundaries in our lives. And that’s harder and harder to do these days when we are never beyond the reach of technology. How hard is it for you to shut off your phone? To close down that email interaction—even for an evening? Good time managers know how to draw those boundaries.
So, check up on yourself—are you truly committed to becoming a better time manager? It’s essential for your personal success.
Would you agree that time is your most valuable asset? We all have twenty-four hours in a day; we are all given the same amount of time each day. How we spend that time makes all the difference in our lives, doesn’t it?
The first time management principle was: time management is about balance and prioritization.
Here’s the next one:
- Time Management is about getting the right stuff done.
You can be very busy, do lots of stuff, look very efficient, but wasting a lot of time because you are busy getting the wrong stuff done. In fact, sometimes I’ve noticed that I purposely stay busy doing the less important things just to avoid or postpone getting to the stuff that really needs to be done.
I remember in the first corporate job I had many years ago, there were certain people who stayed late almost everyday, looking very busy and important. And I was a bit intimidated by them, because every morning they would tell me how late they worked the night before. But gradually I began to realize that they were stretching eight hours of work into ten! They stayed busy doing stuff because it made them feel effective and important, when in reality what they were doing wasn’t adding any value to their work product.
It is better to complete one very important task than one-hundred unimportant tasks. You remember when Jesus was in a crowd of people, when a woman with an issue of blood just touched his garment, hoping to be healed. Jesus stopped right in the midst of that crowd, interrupting this journey to the home of an important man, to heal this one woman—a woman who was an outcast in her society because of her physical condition. It was that important to Jesus—that one person in the midst of all the demands on him.
When you take time for that one person—that one act of kindness that comes your way, it may be the most important thing you do all day. That one thing could be reading a Bible story to your children. Or it could be taking a nap to recharge your batteries. Or spending time listening to someone who needs a friend. Don’t forget that God often has those divine interruptions for us that may appear to be wasting our time, when in reality, they are truly important and effective uses of our time.
Time management is a skill that most people would like to improve. I know that I’m very aware of time—saving time, managing time, spending time—and yet there have been too many days when I had to recognize that my time management was sadly lacking. I was busy, yes, but I didn’t get much done. Do you ever feel that way?
I want to take another look at time management—at five key principles that will help us do a better job. Paul wrote to the Ephesians (5:16) that they were to redeem the time—make good use of their time. As Christ-followers we are to be good stewards of the time God is giving us.
Time Management Principles
Time Management is about balance and prioritization.
We make choices everyday as to what will claim our time and attention, and good time management means that some things will have to wait and some things may have to go.
I remember a time when my daughter was a teenager, and we were planning to wallpaper her room. I was so stressed out because I had planned to get the job done on a certain day, and it just wasn’t working out. In my fretful mode, my wise daughter simply said to me, “Mom, it doesn’t have to be done today.”
Of course it didn’t have to be done that day, but in my mind it had become a priority and that created unnecessary stress for me and my daughter. Believe me, I’ve had to learn that lesson many times over in the years since.
As you face each day, make realistic assessments of what is truly important to get done that day—even if it’s not the thing you want to do. Then get that done first, and who knows, you may have time left over for other things too. One thing I’ve learned to do which has helped me immensely is this: Whatever I have to do today that I don’t want to do, I do it first! Believe me, that is a great help in managing your time.
And don’t forget that you have to make time for what you need to function well—good food, lots of water, exercise, rest, companionship—and of course, most importantly, time with God each day. Leaving those things off for prolonged periods will cause your performance to suffer and you won’t have the strength and motivation to do what has to be done.
For those who may not have heard these Fran stories before, they are told as though Fran has an ongoing conversation with Jesus. My purpose is to help us all realize that as Christ-followers, we indeed have his presence with us all the time and we can talk to him, cry out to him, and listen to him throughout our day, if we just take the time. And Fran’s conversations with Jesus are always based solely on scripture.
As Fran is working at her desk this day, her friend, Louise, a fellow believer, walks into her office and shuts the door behind her. “What is it, Louise?” Fran asks. “What’s happened? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
“Fran, have you read this latest memo from the home office? Listen to this,” Louise reads from her phone:
In order to make certain that our company provides adequate protection for all of our employees and is compliant with Federal and State guidelines, everyone is required to attend a training session addressing these concerns. These are two-hour sessions which will be conducted by an outside organization and will focus on our individual responsibility to affirm and respect everyone in our company. Please select the day you can attend and sign up below.”
“I have not seen that,” Fran replies. “What do you think it’s all about, Louise?”
“Oh I know what it’s all about. I talked to Sandra in HR – you’ve met her.”
“Yes, I know her—she is a fellow believer. I like her a lot,” Fran replies.
“Well, she told me that this training is to tell us how we are to treat LGBTQ people. She said they are making new policies on how we address them, especially cross-gender people, and stuff like that,” Louise says with anxiety in her voice.
“I don’t see a big problem with that, Louise. Do you?” Fran says.
“Well, yeah, I do. They’re trying to make us accept what is against our belief—our doctrine. This is the politically correct culture gone amuck, Fran. This is just step one; what will be next?” Louise is truly upset about it.
Fran gives it some thought. “Louise, we already treat these people like we treat anyone else, right? So, they’re not going to make us do anything we don’t do already—that’s the way I see it. If they just want us to never discriminate and always treat them with respect, I can agree with that. That’s what I think Jesus would do.”
“You just don’t get it, do you Fran?” Louise says with some frustration. “We have to stand for what we believe and not be intimidated by this culture. Everyday you hear about new attacks on our Christian beliefs. They let boys—you know, cross gender girls who were boys—compete in women’s sports and that’s not fair.”
“Well, I understand what you’re saying, but that’s not really what this training is about, is it?” Fran tries to stay calm.
“Like I said, Fran, this is just step one. If we don’t take a stand, who knows what will be next?” And with that, Louise leaves Fran’s office.
Whew, Fran thinks, Louise is really upset. I’ll call her tonight and talk more. So, that evening after the kids are in bed, Fran calls Louise to continue their conversation. “Louise, I didn’t mean to upset you today, and maybe I’m missing something here, but I just don’t see the danger in this training.”
“Fran, I talked with my friend at church tonight, and she agrees with me that if we don’t take a stand now and let the company know our opposition to this kind of training, it will just keep on going. So, I’ve decided to tell Ben that I’m choosing not to go to this training because it is against my beliefs. I know they might fire me for it—who knows? But I think I have to do it to stand true for Jesus.”
Whoa, Fran thinks to herself. Louise is taking this much more seriously than I am. Is she right? She says, “Louise, can you tell me how you came to that decision? Maybe I’m missing something here.”
“You are, Fran—like many other Christians, I think. Our culture is quickly becoming anti-Christian and if we just sit back and do nothing,
What does a vision look like?
Here are five signs to help you identify your God-given vision:
Sign Number 1 – It won’t go away. As you pray about it, it gets stronger, not weaker.
Sign Number 2 – There is a need for it.
Sign Number 3 – God will open doors for you. You will see some small and/or large miracles as God opens these doors. You will be amazed, frightened, awestruck, and excited.
Sign Number 4 – Your spiritual leader(s) will encourage you.
Sign Number 5 – God will give you the right people to help you.
Elsy Riungu is my friend in Nairobi, Kenya. Several years ago at our conference there I spoke on this topic—asking God for a vision. As always, Elsy took to heart what she heard. She prayed about it, and then began a ministry to help save marriages. She rented a venue near her home—with money she didn’t have to spare—and started a monthly meeting for couples. She got speakers, planned the programs, advertised and invited, and for several years she continued that ministry.
After she began she wrote: “Couples ministry is running on well as we meet once a month. It is exciting to minister to mostly young couples. I have had three separated marriages, and after counselling, two of them are restored and enjoying their union. My desire this year is to reach families in the rural areas, where the need is enormous. Pray for me.”
She had no money, no support system backing her up. God gave her a vision, and she was obedient to it, and she was filled with joy to be doing what God has called her to do.
Are you willing to ask for a vision? It begins with prayer, but at some point you have to put feet to your prayer. Start walking through open doors and just keep taking the next right step.
Remember, when it comes to pursuing your vision:
If you don’t go for it, it will fade and you’ll miss the blessing. Use it or lose it. The more you pursue God’s vision for you, the more ability and gifts you will have to do it. God will stretch you and gift you like you’ve never dreamed. But that won’t happen until you take that first step.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
What is your excuse for not asking God to give you a vision—a new beginning, a new passion for pursuing all he wants to do with you and through you? Here’s one of those excuses:
I’ve made too many mistakes, there is too much baggage from my past for me to do anything great for God.
If God only used people with perfect track records, there would be no one to use. God takes us where we are and tells us to put our past behind us and move forward to the good things he wants to do for us. Isaiah wrote: “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland” (Isaiah 43:18-19).
There may be other excuses you have for your lack of vision, but could it be that you don’t have a vision of what God wants to do through you is because you’ve never asked for a vision? James wrote “You do not have, because you do not ask God” (James 4:2b). Jesus told us “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; to the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened” (Matthew 7:7-8).
How do we recognize God’s vision?
Are you willing to ask God for a vision? You say, “I’m not sure I would know one if I saw it!” Good question—how do we know God’s vision for us?
A vision from God will be born in love—love of God, love of the Lord Jesus, and love of others. A God-given vision will not depend upon your giftedness or your hard work or your promotional abilities, though your gifts will be used and you will work hard. But the success of your vision will be a God-thing that can only be explained by his power working in you. And it will always be in harmony with God’s Word.
I urge you to seriously consider whether you need to ask God to give you a vision, to help you step out by faith and realize the potential he has created in you, and the joy that comes when you walk by faith and not by sight.
Many times we fail to soar like an eagle because we’re afraid to take any risks. Here’s an excuse that can keep you mired in mediocrity:
I don’t have the talent or abilities or experience that it takes to be a visionary.
Maybe you’re thinking: People who take risks are gifted in some way or another. I don’t have any special gifts–I’m just an ordinary person, who can do ordinary things in an ordinary way.
If this is your excuse, you are without excuse, because listen to what Paul wrote to the Corinthians: "Brothers and sisters, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. God chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him” (1 Corinthians 1:26-29). How many examples do you want of how God uses ordinary people? Start with Peter, James and John—uneducated fishermen. Consider Tamar, Rahab, Ruth, Bathsheba—all great-grandmothers in the lineage of Jesus Christ—and all totally unqualified for the job. The Bible and church history are replete with examples of people who were used mightily by God in small and large ways, even though they didn’t have the right credentials, the right education, the right skills and abilities. That way, God gets the glory.
I’m too old to ask for a vision.
Are you thinking: If I were in my twenties, well, then, I could do something great for the Lord. But it’s too late now.
Consider Caleb, who after 40 years of wandering in the desert, is allowed to go into the Promised Land. So, now 85 years old, Caleb goes to Joshua and says, “I am still as strong today as the day Moses sent me out; I’m just as vigorous to go out to battle now as I was then. Now give me this hill country that the Lord promised me that day” (Joshua 14:11-12a). If you’ve been using age or some disability as your excuse for not asking God for a vision, pray “God, give me this hill—give me a vision of what you want to do with me now at this age in this time.”
Have you ever asked God to give you a vision of what he wants you to do? Living without God’s vision for your life is missing the abundant life that Jesus came to give you. It is living in mediocrity. It is settling for so much less than God intends for you.
Ephesians 2:10 says we are God’s workmanship created in Christ Jesus to do good works which God prepared in advance for us to do. God has a vision for each of us who are born from above and have been made a part of his family. He has prepared this vision for us—these good works he wants us to do.
Here is one of the most common excuses we give for not seeking God’s vision for our lives:
We’re not willing to take a risk.
Ron Hutchcraft tells the story of being invited to go hiking with some friends to see a breathtaking waterfall. So, as they hiked up the mountain, they came to a large stream that had to be crossed in order to get to the waterfall. Not seeing a bridge, he said to his companions, "How do we get across here?"
"Oh," they said, "you have to walk across the pipe there.” Ron took a look at the pipe and it was small; it was wet; it was dangerous. And his first reaction was, "Thanks but no thanks. I'll stay here.” But his friends urged him, "Come on. The view is on the other side. Come on; walk across the pipe."
Ron had a decision to make. Either stay where he was and miss the view or walk across the pipe. He decided to take the risky way, and he said, "I wouldn't have missed that view for anything. But I had to walk the pipe to get there."
Is Jesus calling you to walk across a pipe, but you are afraid to take the risk? Psalm 18:36 says: "You broaden the path beneath me, so that my ankles do not turn.” When we start across that pipe that looks risky, as soon as you set foot on it, the pipe becomes a broad path, your ankles don't turn!
Walk across the pipe. Ask God for a vision, and when he gives you one that looks risky, go by faith and prove that he can do more than you can ask or think.
I’d like you to imagine this scene. It’s time for your annual evaluation by your boss, and you’re confident it will be a good result because you’ve met all the requirements of your job description. In addition, you’ve only had two sick days and you’re almost always on time. So you’re expecting a good evaluation and hopefully a good raise.
Your boss agrees that you’ve done an adequate job, that you’ve met all the minimum requirements, and after that brief comment, he asks if you have any questions. You’re puzzled; is that all he’s going to say? You expected some credit for meeting the requirements. So you ask if you are going to get a raise.
Your boss then explains that raises are given for people who do more than the job description requires, and since you’ve only met the requirements, you are not qualified for a raise. Would you be shocked at that evaluation? Well, basically that’s what Jesus was teaching his disciples in this parable, as found in Luke 17: Suppose one of you has a servant plowing or looking after the sheep. Will he say to the servant when he comes in from the field, ‘Come along now and sit down to eat’? Won’t he rather say, ‘Prepare my supper, get yourself ready and wait on me while I eat and drink; after that you may eat and drink’? Will he thank the servant because he did what he was told to do? So you also, when you have done everything you were told to do, should say, ‘We are unworthy servants; we have only done our duty’” (Luke 17:7-10). Does it seem harsh to you? Well, Jesus was trying to teach his disciples that just getting by, doing what you’re supposed to do is not enough for commendation. He wants his disciples to have a passion for doing more than their mere duty. He wants his disciples to have a vision for all they could do and be because of Jesus.
The Bible says that without a vision, people perish. I’m not talking about some miraculous sign you receive, or an out-of-body experience or a dream. No, the vision I’m talking about is being able to see what God wants to do in and through you. And without this kind of vision, you perish, you fail to live up to your God-given potential.
I want to encourage you to ask God to give you a vision, so that you aren’t just doing the bare minimum, but you’re soaring like an eagle, way above the ordinary. That’s the abundant life Jesus came to give us.
The Apostle Paul wrote to the Corinthians: “What do you have that you did not receive? And if you did receive it, why do you boast as though you did not?” (1 Corinthians 4:7b). Sometimes it’s easy for us to take credit for our accomplishments, our skills, our education, our talents and abilities, but Paul reminds us that everything that we are and have is something we’ve received from God. Therefore, we should never boast about what God has invested in us, but we should be aware that all of this is Kingdom Equity which we are to use primarily for God’s glory, to advance the Kingdom of God, not just for our own selfish gain.
Kingdom Equity includes our gifts and abilities, but this equity comes in another form, too:
Kingdom Equity of Suffering and Failure
We don’t usually think of the difficult things in our lives as investments, do we? I mean, investments are good things, positive things. If I make a financial investment in real estate or stock or whatever, I am making an investment that I trust will turn out for good—that will reap profits and benefits for me. I expect my investments to do me good; I make them in good faith that they will bring a profit in the long run.
Can it be true that the hard things you’ve gone through, the difficulties you’ve encountered, the heartaches you’ve known—even your sins and failures—can be seen as God’s investment in you? How can that be Kingdom Equity?
I ask you to think of anyone you know who is effective in the Kingdom who has not gone through some difficult situations, who does not have some kind of baggage from his or her past, whose life has always been easy and trouble-free. It is these hard things that drive us to know God, that keep us humble, that show us our total inadequacy and force us to depend on God. Yes, they are Kingdom Equity that God has allowed in our lives for his purpose. And they include things such as:
Your childhood experience. If you were deprived of what you needed as a child—love or protection or security or safety—any of those basics and instead you were abused or misused or abandoned or ignored—that is Kingdom Equity. Your health issues. Maybe you’ve faced some real health fears—cancer or some other diseases or disabilities that have been very difficult—that is Kingdom Equity. Your financial hardships. You’ve lost a job and you’ve faced month-ends without enough money to pay your bills—that is Kingdom Equity. Your unfulfilled dreams and hopes. That man or woman you wanted to marry never came along. That child you wanted to birth, and you couldn’t—those are Kingdom Equity. Broken relationships. That marriage that fell apart, or that friend or family member who is estranged or distant from you—again, Kingdom Equity. Disappointments in people. That adult child who has left the church and the truths you taught him or her about God. That friend who betrayed you. That boss who fired you—more Kingdom Equity. Significant losses. That parent who died—or mate or child or close friend—Kingdom Equity. Unfair and abusive treatment. From a mate or a boss or a friend—Kingdom Equity. Sins from your past. Yes, even those things of which you are ashamed, those times when you chose to live in sin and stray far from God—Kingdom Equity.
All of these are Kingdom Equity that God wants to use for good in your life. I know that sounds almost flippant or it seems to trivialize the pain and suffering of your life. But just the opposite is true: It means that although God is not the author of all these investments and he never condones sin or evil and it is never from God, still he doesn’t waste anything in our lives. And so, as we begin to see these things as Kingdom Equity, then we see that our God is so great that even our sorrows or our sins or the abuse we’ve suffered, or our failures can have meaning and be used for good.
We are so prone to say, “God is good” when something favorable has happened to us.
“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” You may be familiar with this verse from 1 Peter 5:7; I’ve quoted it and encouraged others with it time and again. But as simple as it is, this eleven-word verse makes it clear that there is much power to be unleased in our lives if we truly believe what this verse says.
Cast all your anxieties on him—why? Because he cares for you. Oh, my, he cares for me? He—the one and only God—knows me and cares about me? That’s what it says. Do you believe it?
If you’ve been born again through faith in Jesus Christ, this verse is there for you. Peter wrote it because he knew it was true. He is the one who denied Jesus three times after declaring he would die for him. Peter is the one who ran off while Jesus was being arrested. And now, after the resurrection, after being commissioned by Jesus to go feed his sheep, Peter is a changed man, now empowered by the Holy Spirit, and he’s been feeding the new sheep of the early church. He’s been through all kinds of troubles and has a ton of cares and worries. Those sheep aren’t that easy to lead.
So, inspired by the Holy Spirit, Peter writes: “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” He cares for you. Peter knew that care; he experienced it first-hand. And he assures you and me that the same God who took care of him through all those early days of the new church—that God cares for you, too.
As I’ve been meditating on this tiny piece of scripture, I’ve been so blessed. Yes, I knew it before, but now I know it in new ways. And by God’s grace, I want to live it like never before. You, too? Cast—throw—all your anxieties, every last one of them, on the Lord, the One who has power to rescue you, to comfort you, to give you endurance and peace, because he cares for you. Believe it, live it because it’s true. He cares for you.
We have created a card of this verse to remind you to cast all your anxiety on God. Click here to download.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
You may know this verse so well that you can finish it. It begins: “Cast all your anxiety ON HIM…” (1 Peter 5:7).
And of course, that refers to God. You are invited—or maybe I should say admonished—to cast all your cares on the one and only God, the creator of the universe, the all-wise, all-knowing, all-powerful God who is sovereign.
Honestly, that’s almost hard to believe, isn’t it? Suppose I told you that the President of the United States gave me a personal call and said, “Mary, I just want you to know, I’m here for you. I have lots of power and lots of influence, so if you have any need, any problem, any issue, I can probably help you. So, here’s my private cell number and you can call me any time, day or night, and I’ll take that problem off your hands.” You wouldn’t believe me, would you?
No, because I don’t have access to the President of the United States, and even if I did, he couldn’t solve my problems. But what this verse tells you is that because you have placed your trust in Jesus as your personal Savior, you have access to the God of the universe. You have a personal invitation to come into his presence. You are allowed into his throne room, and with confidence you can cast all your anxieties on him.
So, why are you continuing to worry and fret and be fearful and anxious? Do you believe this verse – “Cast all your anxieties on him because he cares for you”? Do you believe that the One inviting you is the true and only God? Then may I suggest, it’s time you did just that. Throw all those worries on the One who can handle them. You know you can’t—that’s clear, right? But he can and he is waiting on you, longing for you to take him at his word.
We have created a card of this verse to remind you to cast all your anxiety on God. Click here to download.
I’m looking very closely at a very small verse and diving into some of the deep truths that are there. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you (1 Peter 5:7). Here Peter makes it very personal: Cast all YOUR ANXIETY. Yes, that’s you. He is as concerned about your problems and worries as he is anyone else’s. He invites you to throw away your concerns.
The dictionary says that anxiety is “a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome.” And that worry and unease is founded in fear. It causes your faith to be overcome by fear, so that instead of trusting your heavenly Father, you begin to doubt God’s love for you, or wonder if he really is trustworthy. Anxiety causes you to forget that God cares more for your personal well-being than anyone else—including yourself!
Anxiety is the weapon the enemy of your soul uses to whisper lies into your heart and cause you to question God’s goodness and faithfulness. He likes nothing more than to accuse you before our heavenly Father. He uses the same strategy to shipwreck your soul as he did in Eden, by whispering in your ear ‘Is God really concerned about your anxieties? Yours, when after all, there are many more urgent needs in the world than your own?’ He wants to prevent you from casting all your cares and worries on the Lord, and he’ll try any way he can to get you to believe his lies.
Jesus invites you to cast your anxieties on him—right now. So, what about all those worries you’ve been carrying around with you for too long? Isn’t it time to cast all your anxieties on him because he cares for you?
We have created a card of this verse to remind you to cast all your anxiety on God. Click here to download.
Do you know the definition of the word all? Of course you know what all means. So, why would I ask such a simple question?
Here’s why: In the context of 1 Peter 5:7, you may have missed the meaning of this little word all. That verse says, very simply, Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. All means everything you’re worried about; every concern you have; it means anything that is causing you to be anxious, to be fearful. That would include:
Your fear of COVID. Have you been caught in the blanket of fear that has been thrown over the entire world? Who do you think is behind all that fear? It certainly isn’t God, because he never gives us a spirit of fear. The enemy of your soul wants to keep you in fear because then you’re spiritually crippled. Your worry about your child or children. Whether still young or out of the house now, we parents can be very anxious about our children, their future, their wrong choices. Your job concerns—that difficult coworker or impossible boss. Your money worries—maybe the pandemic has taken a toll on your finances. Family relationship issues—with a mate or sibling or parent.
I mean, all just means all, right? Have you realized that God wants ALL your anxieties, not just the big ones, not just the easy ones. He wants them all because he can handle them and you can’t. Jesus said, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light” (Matthew 11:28). And he meant it.
Whatever worry is taking over your mind, whatever heartache is causing you to lose sleep, whatever care is heavy on your heart—can you please just cast them ALL on Jesus? Don’t keep even one of them, no matter how ashamed you may be or how insignificant they may seem. No matter how many times you’ve prayed about it before. Today, cast all of them on Jesus. It’s a small word but if you obey God, that small word can be a burden-lifter for you.
We have created a card of this verse to remind you to cast all your anxiety on God. Click here to download.
There is one small verse in the Bible—it has only eleven words—but if you really understand and take this verse literally, it could be a huge benefit in your life. Here’s the verse from 1 Peter 5:7: Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. Now, you’re probably thinking, I know that verse and I know what it means. But do you really? Let’s take it one word at a time, and our word for today is CAST.
Peter didn’t say drop all your anxieties, or let go of all your anxieties, or leave all your anxieties. He said CAST. It’s not a word we use that often, so let’s use a word that means the same thing: THROW. Throw all your anxieties on him.
To throw something takes force, doesn’t it? It takes intentionality. If I’m going to throw something out the window or at someone, I have to take some muscle, pull my arm back, aim it and with energy, throw it. Well, it’s not an accident that Peter used this word CAST. He’s telling us that if you want to get rid of all your anxieties, all your care, all your worry, and all the stress that goes with them, you’re going to have to throw all of them away from you—out the window, in the trash bin. Throw them!
And to do that, you’re going to need two hands: The hand of prayer and the hand of faith. First, you pick up that anxiety, whatever it is, with both hands. I mean literally take your two hands, and hold them up to God in prayer, telling him all about it and ask for his help. Then by faith, believing God heard and will answer your prayer, throw it away from you. Again, literally with all your strength throw your hands out and cast all that anxiety away from you as far as you can.
If you’re holding on to some cares and anxieties; if you’re losing sleep and worrying about something; if you’re almost sick because of that worry, well, it’s time you believe this simple verse, and you CAST it all on him—throw it to Jesus. And every time you’re tempted to take it back, cast it from you all over again. It could be transforming for your life.
We have created a card of this verse to remind you to cast all your anxiety on God. Click here to download.
A friend of mine was speaking, telling her story of a long marriage with a godly man, four children, several major issues dealing with those children as they became adults, and then watching her husband die of Lou Gehrig’s disease—a long, painful death during which she was the main care giver. Then she told how God has opened a door for her to begin a ministry to widows, and what God is doing in her life now.
Afterward a man came up to her and said, “God has invested a great deal of kingdom equity in you.” Kingdom equity? What was he talking about? It was a new term to her, but he went on to say that God had allowed her to experience many difficult things in her life and had given her many opportunities to learn and grow, and now that God has all these investments in her, she has great resources to use in God’s Kingdom.
God has invested Kingdom Equity in all of his children because our purpose here on this earth is to bring glory to God by doing the good things he prepared in advance for us to do: “For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do” (Ephesians 2:10 NASB). Before the beginning of time if you are born from above through faith in Jesus Christ, your name was written in the Lamb’s Book of Life and your days were written in his book before one of them came to be. God has predetermined a list of good works he wants you to do, and he knows what resources and talents and gifts and experiences you will need to do those good works. From the beginning of your days he has been investing in you what you will need to do those good works.
This Kingdom Equity comes in two different forms:
The gifts and abilities and talents and opportunities and education and experiences you have been given that will be needed to do Kingdom work. The difficulties and hardships and troubles and failures you’ve gone through which have taught you to trust and know God like nothing else can do.
Have you overlooked those investments God has made in you? Or have you wasted them on yourself instead of on the Kingdom? Or have you failed to recognize them? It is Kingdom Equity, and you will give an account to God as to your stewardship of the investments God has put in you.
Kingdom Equity of Gifts and Abilities
God invests equity in us through our gifts, our talents, our skills, the things we’ve learned, our education, our years of simply living life! For example, a great deal of my experience in the business world was to make presentations. For years I conducted customer service seminars all across the country. I’d go from one city to another, one hotel to another in a given week, go face a different audience every day, and give that same presentation each day with enthusiasm and energy, regardless of how I felt. That experience was planned by God in the “good works” he had for my life. It gave me great experience in being in front of an audience, thinking on my feet, dealing with unexpected interruptions and disruptions.
I have a friend who has begun a ministry to widows in Africa, teaching them how to make things that they can sell to support themselves and their children. They have to use sewing machines—not electric ones because electricity in Africa is scarce and often undependable. She has purchased treadle sewing machines—and guess how she learned to sew as a young girl. On a Singer treadle machine. So, she can teach them how to sew on a treadle machine. That’s Kingdom Equity that God is now using.
What about the skills you’ve acquired through your life? How are you using that Kingdom Equity for God? He didn’t invest that experience, that talent, that gift in you just for your enjoyment. He expects a return on his investment.
Paul wrote to Timothy: “For this reason I remind you to fan into a flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands” (2 Timothy 1:6). Fan into a flame the gifts God has invested in you.
Transformation through Worship
The other day I was experiencing a mild state of feeling depressed. I felt down and blue—the concerns and unknowns of life just started weighing on me. I am someone who likes control and certainty, and on this particular day of feeling out of control and uncertain, I found myself in a slump and I just could not shake it.
Sometimes in an effort to find relief from feeling out of sorts, I binge on reruns of my favorite show, scroll through Facebook and Instagram or reach for food as comfort. But on this particular day, instead of checking out, I tuned in. I put in my earbuds and started to worship. When I worshiped, everything shifted. My mood transformed.
Did you know that you are wired for worship? God in his glory designed us so that worship literally impacts our brains and our minds....and ultimately, our lives. Studies have shown, science has proven, that when we worship, God created us so that neurotransmitters such as dopamine, oxytocin, and serotonin are released that induce happiness and joy and boost our immune system. God designed us so that when we worship him, we experience decreases in depression, anxiety, and chronic pain. We experience more joy!
We often wait to worship until we feel like it but we are actually wired to worship. Sometimes the last thing we feel like doing when we are frustrated with work or a difficult co-worker, when we are faced with a job loss, a relationship breakdown or an unknown future—oftentimes the last thing we feel like doing is breaking out in praise. Yet when we stop to worship and praise Jesus for his magnificence, when we praise him and thank him for who he is, our lives transform even if our circumstances don’t change, worship changes us. You are wired for worship. Intentionally offering our worship to God strengthens our faith, helps us in life’s challenges, and unlocks the key to joy no matter what your life circumstance.
Set a praise challenge for yourself. Spend ten minutes a day worshiping God. See what happens. Your life will transform and God is worthy!
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
How Discipline Creates Transformation
Is there an area of your life that you want to change? Maybe it is a relationship that keeps falling into unhealthy patterns, or perhaps something with your job, your finances, your health and physical well-being. Often we want things to change but if we are honest, we do not want to do the hard work, over time, that transformation requires. We want the result but we don’t want the discipline. In a world of instant and quick-fix, we have become accustomed to having things at the push of a button. But transforming areas of our lives requires more than a quick-fix. Think about it, how many times have you started a new diet…. It lasted a day, or two and you wonder…. Why haven’t I lost 10 pounds and gone down 2 pant sizes? Sounds ridiculous when I say it out loud but how many of us have thought that? Or, I want my finances to be transformed so that I am not in debt but we keep our trigger finger on the Amazon Prime button?
The results we are achieving now, in our life, relationships, physical health, finances, etc., are the result of the habits we have created over time. Maybe we say we want a loving and thriving relationship with our spouse but we are in the habit of criticizing them. Perhaps we want to be chosen for a promotion at work but we are in the habit of being late to meetings and missing deadlines. If we want to transform an area of our life, we need to examine the habits that have produced the result we currently have. And be brutally honest with ourselves.
Our habits determine our results and creating different results requires discipline. So choose an area of your life that you are committed to transforming. Write down the habits that have produced the results you currently have. Now, write down the habits that, when practiced consistently over time, will produce the results you say you want. And here is a key. Get clear on WHY you are committed to transforming. When you have a vision, a WHY, you are more likely to stick with your commitment and the discipline required.
In 1 Corinthians 9:27 the Apostle Paul talks about discipline. He says, “I discipline my body like an athlete, training it to do what it should.” His why—the reason he is committed to this discipline is so that he can be a credible witness for Jesus. We need a compelling vision that keeps us on track.
Transformation takes commitment, action, follow-through, and perseverance. Choose the pain of discipline over the pain of regret. Embrace uncomfortable. Perfect the art of bouncing back if you get off track. Applying discipline over time will result in transformation.
Renewing our Minds Creates Transformation
Have you ever let your thoughts get the best of you?
If we want to experience transformation we need to mind our minds. You cannot change anything unless you change your thinking. Where our thoughts go, our lives will follow. What we believe determines how we live! And the Bible has a lot to say about our minds and mindsets! So we know it must be important if it is important to God.
Ephesians 4:23: Be made new in the attitude of your mind.
Romans 12:2a: Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.
As we mature as followers of Jesus we have to develop disciplined thought lives. The first step is to develop awareness of our thoughts so we can start the process of bringing our thoughts into captivity to Christ. Most often we just let our thoughts run wild and we ruminate rather than stop to examine what we are thinking and ask, “Is this thought true? Does this thought align with God’s Word—the truth of who he says he is, what he says about me or how he sees this person or situation?”
What thoughts are we dwelling on? Our thoughts are influenced by what we allow in and focus on. Mind your mind by being aware of what you are putting in it. What music are you listening to, people are you hanging out with, what social media are you scrolling through or Netflix series are you binging on? Are we spending more time dwelling on the things of the world or God’s Word?
As we strive to be aware of our thoughts check in with the emotions you are experiencing. Our emotions are indicators like the check engine light in your car. Your feelings are an indicator to check in with your thoughts. What thought are you dwelling on that keeps you in an unproductive, unhealthy cycle? Our thoughts produce feelings and our feelings produce behaviors.
Over time, when we actively mind our mind and choose which thoughts to dwell on, holding them captive, making them obedient to Christ, our brains will be trained to think on the thoughts that are helpful rather than the ones that are defeating and destructive. We will be transformed by the renewing of our mind.
This is more than positive thinking it is biblical thinking. We see this in the letter Paul the Apostle wrote to the Philippians as he makes this appeal to followers of Jesus. Friends …whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. …...think about such things. “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things” (Philippians 4:8). Try it! Next time you are having a thought that is destructive, depressing or just all around not helpful, choose a new thought that thinks the best not the worst. Redirect your focus and see what happens.
Who We Are Being Creates Transformation
Who are you being? That may sound like a funny question. We don’t often think about or consider that question. We are more accustomed to the question, “what do you do?” Especially when meeting someone for the first time inevitably the question, “what do you do for a living” comes up. We are so accustomed to identifying ourselves by what we do. But what if we were to operate from a different question. Who am I being?
While what we do has significance, God is more concerned with who I am being….how I am showing up in the world, on the job, and in my relationships. Ask yourself the question, “how am I committed to people experiencing me?” For example, if you were to ask me what I do, I would say that I am a coach, leadership trainer, and director of women’s ministry. That is what I do for my work and calling. You might answer that question by saying I am a mom, or a doctor, lawyer, teacher, massage therapist, or customer service representative. That is what you do. But regardless of what you do, who are you committed to being?
The Bible gives us many examples of who we are called to be. And as a woman who loves and follows Jesus, here are a few of those examples:
1 Corinthians 13 we see we are called to be patient and kind. Colossians 4:12 calls us to put on, to BE….. compassionate, kind, humble, forgiving, loving, and thankful. And in Galatians 5:22 we see who we are called to be as we grow in the fruit of the Holy Spirit; loving, joyful, peaceful, patient, kind, producing good, faithful, gentle and exhibiting self-control - showing restraint in our thoughts, emotions and actions. Other examples we see in God’s word include being generous, courageous, merciful, humble—the character traits go on and on.While what we do may change throughout the course of our life, who we are called to be, who we are being does not change based on our circumstances. It is who we are regardless of what is happening around us or to us.
So, who are you committed to being? What qualities of Christ-likeness is God calling you to grow in? God is not as concerned with what you do as he is with who you are being and who you are becoming. And the awesome news is that we have the transforming power of the Holy Spirit in us to help us grow. Ask the Holy Spirit to highlight the Christlike qualities he wants to produce in you. As you focus on who you are being, see how your life and relationships transform.
Abiding in Jesus Creates Transformation
I would venture to say that we all want to experience growth and transformation. Let’s look at how abiding in Jesus creates transformation.
I am intentionally starting out with abiding because our relationship with Jesus, our abiding in Jesus is the most important posture we take as followers of Christ. When we abide, our lives will transform, our relationships will transform, our work will transform. In John 15 Jesus says: Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing. …By this my Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit and so prove to be my disciples. As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in my love. If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father's commandments and abide in his love. These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full” (John 15:4-5, 8-11 NKJV, emphasis mine). Any time we read scripture one of the things to notice are words that are repeated. When we see a word used several times it means that it is really important and the person speaking is driving home a point. Here we see Jesus instructing us to abide seven times in these short but powerful verses. To abide means to dwell, not to depart, to be present, to wait, to remain. We will experience transformation as we abide in Jesus. As we abide in Jesus he promises us that we will bear much fruit. And as we remain in him, when we dwell in his love, when we keep his commandments, we are promised fullness of joy!
How are you abiding in Jesus? How are his words abiding in you? In order to abide in his Word we need to be reading his Word, making it a daily practice to dwell in the truth of scripture. The best time for me is first thing in the morning. Maybe the morning is the best time for you or perhaps over lunchtime or before bedtime. Make it a daily practice to be in God’s Word. As you abide in Jesus, as you dwell on his Word, remain in his love and obey his commandments you will experience transformation, bear fruit, and experience fullness of joy!
I am pleased to interview Lisa Bishop. Her story is one to encourage all of us—she came to saving faith because of a coworker who lived for Jesus on the job, and from her life, Lisa became hungry to have the peace and joy and purpose that she had. It’s a wonderful story to inspire all of us.
Can we stay positive in a negative world? It’s hard to do when you work or live with someone who is very negative all the time. Don't you think negative people are more successful at making positive people negative than positive people are at making negative people positive? Well, it's time we started to reverse that situation.
If you are forced to spend a lot of time with a negative person, learn to tune them out. You can do that, you know. Just think about something good; hum a good chorus inside your head as they prattle on about how terrible the job is or the boss or the weather. Don't listen.
And another suggestion is to respond to their negatives with a positive. If they gripe about the job, you say, "Well, I guess there are some unemployed people out there who'd love to have our job.” Say it nicely, quietly, but don't be afraid to be positive with those negative people. We allow them to intimidate us too easily. They may not like your positive response, but as long as you do it in a nice way, please don't let that stop you. You must protect your mind from their negativism, or they'll poison your thinking.
Let me ask you: Can we stay positive in a negative world? If it's true that attitudes are a choice, the answer has to be yes. Next question: Is it easy? "No, it's hard!” It IS important. No matter how difficult it may be to stay positive on a given day, it's still easier than being negative. When you and I choose to be negative, we are choosing the hard way. Being positive is the easy way out.
You see, when we live by God's principles, we always choose the easy way. It is the disciplined way; it takes commitment and a reliance on his power within us. But it is still the easy way. Our way is hard, our way brings problems and causes difficulties. So, don't be fooled by the thought that being positive is too hard. No, the truth is being negative is too hard.
I want to encourage you to really get serious about developing and maintaining a positive attitude. We represent Jesus Christ, and we have every reason to be optimistic. And we should demonstrate that to our worlds by maintaining a positive attitude, regardless of our circumstances.
I hope you'll be willing to start that process today and continue it for the rest of your life. And to help you, you’ll find an Attitude Check-up Form which you can copy and use to help you remember to put these biblical principles into practice.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
How can we stay positive in a negative world? Here is a mental technique that I find helpful as I struggle, like everyone else, to stay positive in a negative world.
We all have a limited amount of energy to spend in any given day. If we spend too much, we begin to run on stress and that's when bad things happen. Therefore, we need to keep our supply of emotional, mental and physical energy at appropriate levels. It is our duty to get enough sleep, exercise, and right food so that we replenish our bodies. And we need to laugh, take breaks, get away, not try to be super people, understand we can't please everyone, watch out for our perfectionist tendencies—all those things are important to keeping the bank account of energy re-supplied.
Then we have to be careful how we spend that emotional energy. Let's walk through a typical day. You leave home in a good mood, but before you get to work, there's a traffic problem or the driver in front of you is very slow or something. So, the blood pressure starts rising and you're spending emotional energy. As you get to your job, the phone is ringing and you have to deal with an angry, upset caller. You spend some more emotional energy. About mid-morning the computer goes down, then your boss dumps more work on you and you're already behind schedule, a co-worker irritates you and causes you problems, you get a headache at noon, and the day goes downhill from there.
You're emotionally broke by noon; the account is empty because you've spent all your emotional money on those little things. Now for the rest of that day you're running on stress, saying things you shouldn't, taking your frustrations out on innocent people, and doing damage to your body. Not smart, is it? You've wasted a lot of emotional energy on things that, for the most part, don't really matter.
So, try to be very careful about how you spend your emotional energy. Make it a matter of prayer and talk to yourself a lot throughout the day as you run into those negatives. I say things like "Mary, what difference is this going to make in 24 hours?" and if it doesn't have a 24-hour significance, I shouldn't spend any of my energy on it.
Throughout your day make yourself more aware of how you're spending that emotional energy, and keep asking, "Is it worth it?” And by God's grace with his wisdom, you will learn to be much more frugal in the way you spend your energy.
If we surveyed people who know you well, people who live with you or work with you, would they describe you as a positive person? Do you gripe and complain a lot? Do you imagine all the bad things that might happen, and focus on the dark side of life?
Staying positive in a negative world requires an attitude check-up. Are you mostly positive, mostly negative, or half and half? Be honest and evaluate your attitude.
What are the things in your world which tend to bring you down? I call them "negative pulls.” I think it's very helpful if you make a list of those things. That list might include those co-workers who get to you, your manager, or if you're a manager, employees. And then there's all the other people in our world, whether customers or friends or family. People who we interact with regularly affect us directly.
Our environment can have a strong negative impact on us. That, in addition to a heavy workload or an impossible schedule, can start to ruin a good day. And then, of course, there are personal problems. Perhaps you don't feel good or maybe you're worried about a sick child. It could be financial worries.
When you identify the things in your world that tend to destroy your positive attitude, the next thing to do is to pray about each of those things, each of those people. You know, nothing is too big, too small, or too insignificant for God. He wants you to bring every detail of your life to him in prayer, confess how you feel about it, and ask him to give you his viewpoint.
Let me say again, I'm not talking about denial. Certainly it is often necessary to confront the negatives of your life, to embrace the pain and not run from it. But if you dwell on the negatives continually, you won't be healed. Somewhere along the way you must learn to turn your thoughts and heart toward God's goodness rather than living in the pain of the past.
Staying positive in a negative world means learning to accept what goes with your territory. There are some negatives inherent in any job or situation, and you should expect it and not take it personally. Staying positive means getting control of your self-talk and not allowing yourself to feed negative junk into your head. Staying positive takes the power of God's Spirit within you, but if you're a Christian, it is not mission impossible. And it will give you a strong testimony in your world if you are a positive person.
Attitude is a word we kick around a lot, isn't it? Should a Christian have a mostly positive attitude in life?
Chuck Swindoll has said, "I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it.” That 90% is attitude. We can't control the 10% that happens to us, be we can control how we respond. It's very important to understand that attitude is a choice. You see, lots of us want to blame our attitudes on the circumstances or on other people. We say, "Yeah, well you wouldn't have a good attitude if you had my job.” Or, "I'd be positive if it weren't for my boss, or my husband, or my wife, or my children" - fill in the blank! Or "How do you expect me to be positive when I just lost my job?"
But think about it: Nobody can make you have a bad attitude—no matter how bad the situation is—if you don't want to. And nobody can force you to have a good attitude—no matter how good the situation is—if you don't want to. Your attitude is your choice.
In an age when we've taken the art of shifting blame to its highest levels, that may not sound good to your ears. It's a lot easier to blame it on others and let yourself off the hook, but if you don't face up to your responsibility for your own attitude, it will always control you and you'll be in negative territory much of the time.
Bill Marriott of the Marriott Corporation is quoted as saying "We don't hire people and ask them to be nice, we hire nice people.” What he recognizes is that training won't turn employees into good performers if their attitudes are rotten. And that is so true.
When I taught customer service skills in the business world, I often felt a tinge of guilt as I urged people to stay positive when most of them didn't have God's power in them to help them do it. But for us Christians, we do have the incredible power of the Spirit of Christ, living within us, and that means we can do what otherwise would be difficult or impossible without him.
Nonetheless, there are many Christians who are just as negative as everybody else around them and that shouldn't be. One of our unique witnesses to the world should be that in spite of the circumstances, we can be joyful and positive. We have something to be positive about. How can we claim that Jesus makes a difference now and for eternity if we're always in negative mode?
PMA—Positive Mental Attitude—it's a term we hear a good bit. Well, should a Christian have a positive mental attitude? And if so, how do we do that in a very negative world?
When I talk about staying positive in a negative world, I'm not talking about denial or sticking your head in the sand. And the Bible is clear in pointing out the negatives of sin, of disobedience, selfishness, etc. Obviously there are times we must focus on the negatives.
But as I read scripture, I am convinced that a Christian who is really desirous of pleasing God and obeying him in everyday life will be developing a positive attitude. It should be a natural outcome of walking with God and getting to know him better and better.
There’s no question that a strong biblical principle is to be a positive thinking and living person. If we don't have something to be positive about in this negative world, who does? After all, as believers we know the end of this story. We know that God is triumphant and that we are going to reign with him in Heaven. We know that no matter how terrible things look all around us, we have a hope and a promise that is steadfast, so of all people, we believers ought to stay positive in this negative world.
For example, if we think the way Philippians 4:8 tells us to, our thinking will be about things that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely and admirable. We'll find very little room there for negative thinking. And if we strive to do everything without complaining or arguing, as Paul tells us in the second chapter of Philippians, then our words are going to become more and more positive. We must conclude that a Christian who strives to glorify Jesus in their everyday life is one who works hard to maintain a positive attitude, right in the midst of this negative world.
I remember after my freshman year in college I was traveling to Maryland from my home in Georgia to work as a camp counselor for the summer. I had a 24-hour bus ride, as I remember, and during that long ride I made a decision to change my personality. I was going to a place where no one knew me, so I had the perfect opportunity to be whoever I wanted to be, or so I thought.
I decided that instead of being the out-going, assertive, take-charge type that I had been all my life, I would become the quiet, reserved, undemonstrative type of person. It seemed to me that this kind of personality was a much better one than the one I had. I'm sure part of my decision was based on my feelings that the boys liked the quiet type more than the out-going type, but I also remember a girl in my dorm at school who was quiet, and it seemed everybody liked her. So, I figured if I were more like her, I'd be nicer, more likable and more successful. And I really thought that God wanted every woman to be like her.
I sat on that bus all those hours and determined that there was no reason I couldn't be just like the girl in my dorm. All I had to do was set my mind to it, and I could change my whole personality. Here was my perfect chance, and I was committed to doing just that.
I can still remember those first few days at the camp, as I concentrated so hard on being someone else. I had to think about it all the time, so that I would remember to be different. Mostly I just forced myself to be quiet, but instead of impressing people with how nice I was, they thought I was unfriendly. I really tried hard to be just like my friend at school, but let me tell you, I failed miserably. I could only keep it up a few short days, and the effect was not a good change in my personality, but rather it made me look and feel phony, which of course, was true.
I suppose we've all been through similar experiences, when we've tried to be like someone else, instead of being ourselves. I would imagine that some of you are unhappy with who you are right now and find yourself wanting to be different. Maybe, like me, you've tried to change your personality and found it doesn't seem to work.
Did you ever stop and think about what it really means when you try to be like someone else? It means you think God made a mistake in the way he made you. It means you would have created yourself differently if you'd had a choice. It demonstrates a lack of trust in God's wisdom; it says you think God was either wrong or cruel to make you the way you are.
Now, that doesn't mean we shouldn't try to improve and get better and learn from others, but I'm talking about when we desire to be totally different than we are. When that's our attitude, it's really like a slap in God's face because we're convinced he didn't give us a fair shake.
I want to encourage you to remember that you are unique; there's no one else like you in the whole world. God is so infinitely creative, that he's able to give each of us unique traits and personalities, and he has designed you to be yourself. He has a purpose for you that no one else could exactly fulfill. He wants your personality, your type, to do a certain job in the Kingdom of God.
You are God’s canvas, and scripture tells us that we are fearfully and wonderfully made, that God knit us together in our mother's womb, that he is intimately acquainted with us down to counting the hairs on our heads, and we are each created in his image. Now, just put all those facts in your head, and consider what that means.
First of all, you're not a mistake. You've all heard little jokes like "When God was giving out brains, he forgot you.” Or "When God was giving out looks you thought he said books and you said, 'I don't want any.'“ Well, maybe those jokes aren't as harmless as they seem, because they teach a basic untruth. God didn't make a mistake when he designed you. You were planned in the mind of God.
What made Jesus the greatest leader ever? He was able to communicate a vision of what people could become. "Follow me," he said to some poor fishermen, "and I will make you fishers of men.” He told his disciples they would do even greater things than he had done. He beautifully communicated the vision and importance of what he was asking people to do.
Another reason Jesus was such a terrific people person is that He made the benefits and rewards very clear. "I came to give you abundant life," he promised. "Great will be your reward in heaven," he told them. "I'm going to prepare a place for you," he said. He understood the importance of work-related benefits and rewards.
Jesus was wonderful with people because he was willing to forgive them and give them second and third chances. He didn't give up on someone just because they had failed. Think of Peter; he denied Jesus three times, but Jesus restored him to fellowship and Peter became the rock of the early church.
And Jesus was able to relate so beautifully with people because he had a servant attitude. He came to serve, not to be served, he said, and he demonstrated it over and over again. Just imagine—the God-man coming to earth to serve mankind. Incredible but true. He was a servant.
But mostly, Jesus was successful as a leader because he truly loved and cared for each individual and put their interest above his own. He loved so much that he died. No wonder he changed the course of all history. Was there ever anyone like him? No never! But the incredible news is that as believers, we have his Spirit in us, and are being transformed into his image.
Ask yourself, how are your people skills? Do you communicate a vision to people? Are you willing to reward those who earn it? Do you give people a second chance? Are you a servant-leader? And do you truly care for others? Those are some of the attributes that made Jesus so special.
How often have you said of someone something like, "They're really smart but they just have no people skills.” As believers, that should not be true of us because we should have the same heart for people that Jesus did. Do you need better people skills? I know that I do. Let's make it a matter of daily prayer and ask God to make us more like Jesus in relating to the people in our lives.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
You’ve heard it said that it is lonely at the top. Well, there is some truth in that, because those at the top—those in authority—have certain responsibilities and obligations to those under them and we really can’t afford too many mistakes. Here’s the next mistake to avoid.
Not Recognizing Employee Achievements
In these days of constant change, downsizing, and increased worker uncertainty, finding ways to recognize your employees for the good that they do is more important than ever. The old One Minute Manger mantra—catch people doing something right and tell them—is still one of the smartest habits you can cultivate as a manager. Sometimes a word of commendation from a manager means more to an employee than a raise.
I think most of us managers want and intend to recognize good employees, but we just often let it fall between the cracks. I know that’s too true for me at times. It’s not that hard to do and it reaps wonderful benefits. Something like a written note, thanking an employee for a job well done, can be very meaningful. Maybe a small reward, like a gift card for coffee or lunch, would be truly appreciated. Thanking people in group settings—this is very meaningful to employees. Too often I take it for granted that the people who work for me know how I feel about them, how much I appreciate them. And that may be true, but they still need to hear it from me often.
Let’s review the eight mistakes you want to avoid as you manage people:
Not giving adequate feedback Not making time for your employees Being too “hands off: Being too friendly/buddy-buddy Failing to define the goals Hiring too quickly Not walking the talk Not recognizing employee successes and achievements
No doubt, like me, you’ve already made some of those mistakes, but it’s never too late to change and improve. I hope you’ve found these helpful.
If you’re a manager or supervisor here are some more basic mistakes to avoid.
Hurrying Recruitment
When it’s time to hire someone, and you need that person on board sooner rather than later, if you’re not careful, you can rush into a recruitment that you later greatly regret. I know, because I’ve done it. I can recall times when I saw in a prospective employee what I wanted to see in that person, instead of realistically assessing their skills. Then very soon that person had to be let go, with a lot of grief for that person and a lot of wasted time and money for me and my organization.
If you’re not particularly good at the hiring process, get help from someone who is. That’s a lesson I have finally learned. Proverbs 11:14 tells us: For lack of guidance a nation falls, but victory is won through many advisers. A smart manager recognizes his or her own areas of weakness or incompetence or lack of experience and looks for help there.
Not "Walking the Talk"
Years ago I was hired to do some customer service training for a large company. The manager wanted his people to have consistently good telephone skills because most of their contact with their customers was by phone, so this was important. But I noticed that this manager’s telephone manners were the worst! When I suggested that it would make a big difference to his employees if they saw that he was changing his bad habits, he just laughed and said that he had been that way for years and he wasn’t about to change now. Well, I knew that my training would have limited success if the employees didn’t see him walk the talk.
As Christ-followers, it is even more important that we walk the talk. I often think of this verse from 2 Corinthians 8:21: For we are taking pains to do what is right, not only in the eyes of the Lord but also in the eyes of man. Remember, you can’t expect your employees to have a better work ethic than you do.
And one more thing: your attitude matters. I always say that managers don’t have the luxury to be in a bad mood, because your attitude—more than anyone else’s—is contagious and when your attitude is negative, it will spread like wildfire through the whole team.
The better job we do as managers, the better those on our team will perform. So, here are three more mistakes to avoid.
Being Too "Hands-Off"
Have you ever had this happen: One of your employees completes an important project, but you discover too late that this person misunderstood exactly what to do, and since you didn’t stay in touch throughout the process, the time and money invested in that project was wasted?
Nobody wants to be micro-managed but going to the opposite extreme where you simply take a hands-off approach isn't a good idea either. Find that right balance between micro-managing and staying in touch.
Proverbs 15:23 says: A person finds joy in giving an apt reply— and how good is a timely word! A timely word given by you as a manager could avoid a lot of heartache later.
Being Too Friendly
There is a fine line between being friendly and approachable to the people who work for you—truly caring about them—and trying to be buddy-buddy friends with them, even to be their counselor. There will be times when as a manager you will have to make tough decisions regarding people in your team, and some people will be tempted to take advantage of your relationship if you're too friendly with them. So, you’ll need to set boundaries that, while not exactly spelled out, are clear to your employees. It doesn’t mean you can’t socialize with them and have fun. But again—finding the right balance between being a friend and being the boss—that’s your challenge.
Failing to Define Goals
When your people don't have clear goals, they muddle through their day. They can't be productive if they have no idea what they're working for, or what their work means. They also can't prioritize their workload effectively, meaning that projects and tasks get completed in the wrong order.
Proverbs 29:18 (KJV) says: Where there is no vision, the people perish: but he that keepeth the law, happy is he. Not everyone is able to see the vision that may be very clear to you, so cast the vision, define the goals, and you’ll have happier and much more productive people.
Are you a manager or supervisor, or perhaps a business owner?
Here are some of the more common mistakes that managers make in dealing with their employees. The smart manager tries to avoid these mistakes, rather than learn from making them!
Not Providing Feedback
According to 1,400 executives polled by The Ken Blanchard Companies, failing to provide feedback is the most common mistake that leaders make. When you don't provide prompt feedback to your people, you're depriving them of the opportunity to improve their performance. To avoid this mistake, learn how to provide regular feedback to your team.
If you’re like me, you hate confrontation, but a good manager has to be able to confront situations that need improvement. For example, if you have an employee who is making very bad impressions by their manner with customers, on the phone or in person, the longer you avoid giving feedback and helping that employee change, the more harm will be done to your organization.
Or course, equally important is to provide positive feedback.
Not Making Time for Your Team
When you're a manager or leader, it's easy to get so wrapped up in your own workload that you don't make yourself available to your team. Yes, your plate is full and it’s easy to rationalize why you don’t have time today for your people. But without being available when they need you, your employees will often flounder and waste time or make unnecessary mistakes.
It really comes down to being willing to listen, as Proverbs 18:13 reminds us: To answer before listening—that is folly and shame.
I think it’s a good idea to establish times in your day or week for regular meetings with key employees where they know you will listen and truly give them time to express their thoughts and ideas. You might consider having an established time when “your door is open” and anyone can talk with you. It will be time well spent.
What if you got a medical report back that wasn’t good? What if you lost your job? What if you caught COVID-19? What if someone you love died? What if you were robbed by a car jacker? What if someone broke into your home? What if...What if...What if....
We could go on for hours listing all the possible “what ifs” you or I could face. I want to encourage you to move from “what if” to “even if.” It could become a turning point in your spiritual journey, as you learn to trust God in the face of the unknown.
The “what ifs” are often negative, right? They are usually full of fear and worrisome imaginations. And when you focus on all those “what ifs,” when you allow your mind to go to those negative possibilities, it just discourages you and frankly, makes you miserable. So, let me ask you: How much time do you spend in the “what ifs” of life? In fear and worry, thinking about what could or might happen?
Here’s another “what if”: What if you changed “what if” to even if”? Even if I lose my job. . . even if I catch COVID-19, even if I’m robbed, even if someone I love dies. If you’re born from above through faith in Jesus Christ, what if you faced your “what ifs” with truth from God’s Word, truth that would set you free from the fear and worry and despair that your “what ifs” have caused?
We have promises from God’s Word that we should throw in the face of our “what ifs.” Promises like: When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze (Isaiah 43:2).
Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you” (Hebrews 13:5). So, when you’re facing a “what if,” stop and talk to yourself. Seriously, you need to talk to yourself—out loud if possible—and remind yourself of God’s promises. Remind yourself of these truths. Bring those “what if” thoughts into captivity and make them obey the Lord.
You remember the story of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, those three Jewish young men who were forcibly taken from Jerusalem to Babylon to serve in King Nebuchadnezzar’s court. Shortly after they were forced into the service of this pagan king, they were faced with a direct affront to their faith in Jehovah God, as the king set up a golden image and said that everyone had to fall down and worship this pagan image or else be thrown into a fiery furnace.
Talk about a “what if”! What if they continued to serve the true God, Jehovah, and refused to bow down and worship that golden idol? They would perish as young men in the prime of their lives. This was a serious what if; there was no question that refusing to obey the king’s order would result in death. So, what was their decision? Here it is from Daniel 3: Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego replied to him, “King Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to deliver us from it, and he will deliver us from Your Majesty’s hand. But even if he does not, we want you to know, Your Majesty, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up” (Daniel 3:16-18). They went from “what if” to “even if” and declared that they trusted in their God to deliver them, but even if they were burned to death in that furnace, they would not bow to any other god.
Maybe you’re facing a fiery furnace of your own—something that could totally destroy you, or so it seems. Maybe a financial furnace, or a health furnace, or a relationship furnace, and you’re in the “what if” stage as you face that furnace. Can you replace your “what if” with an “even if,” declaring that even if your fears are realized, even if the worst happens, you will trust in God to deliver you, to go through it with you, and to rescue you?
I know it’s not always easy to get along with your boss and I know that bosses are not perfect. But I also know that you will do yourself a great favor to avoid making mistakes.
Small things matter, and good manners is another small thing that can make a difference in how your boss sees you. The simple everyday manners of helping others, letting others go first, thanking people, showing kindness to others—those little things create an impression. Failing to pay attention to them can cause self-inflicted harm to you. This verse sums it up perfectly: For we are taking pains to do what is right, not only in the eyes of the Lord but also in the eyes of man (2 Corinthians 8:21).
I’ve given you seven mistakes to avoid, but since we all make mistakes, here’s what to do when you have made a mistake:
Acknowledge the mistake. Take responsibility and offer to fix the problem if it's one you can fix. That may be something as simple as a sincere apology, but your willingness to take the responsibility will go down very well with your manager. Move on and do the best possible work you can, avoiding the mistake in the future. Don’t wallow in guilt; put it behind you and learn from the experience. Don't let the mistake shake your confidence so that you lose your ability to do your work.
Remember, everyone makes mistakes at one time or another. Don't hide behind your mistakes, but don't hide under your desk either. Show your boss it was a fluke and that will never happen again. Then, make it a matter of prayer. If you are a Christ-follower, you have power through prayer and God’s Spirit to put mistakes behind you and move forward.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
Having held several positions with very different managers, I look back at my career and acknowledge some mistakes I’ve made in dealing with them. I want to help you avoid those mistakes.
Mistake 6: Going Over Your Manager’s Head
When I worked in IBM, there was the “Open Door” policy. This simply meant that any employee was empowered to go to their boss with any complaint or suggestion or question, because the door was always open. However, the rule was that you go first to your immediate supervisor and if for some reason that was not satisfactory, then you could go to the next level of management. But if you decided to go over your manager’s head and talk first to their manager, you would be immediately advised that you first talk to your manager before taking it any further, and it would not be well-received if you didn’t do it that way.
This “Open Door” policy is a good one, I believe, in keeping communications open and allowing for grievances to be resolved. But you begin by talking first to your immediate manager and not going over their head. You may feel that your manager will not listen and will not do anything about your situation, but until you have tried to resolve it on that level, it will almost always be a mistake to bypass your manager and go to the next level.
Mistake 7: Failing to Pay Attention to the “Small Stuff”
Remembering that perception equals reality, if you fail to do the things that create good impressions, you will do harm to yourself and your career. For example, dressing appropriately for your position. I know that casual attire is very acceptable in many work environments, but even if that is true where you work, your casual attire needs to be neat, clean, modest and coordinated. Looking sloppy or careless won’t do you any good. Go the extra mile, if necessary, to give the perception that you do care how you look and you do take time to make a professional appearance.
Take clues from your manager. If he or she dresses very professionally, that tells you that they expect and respect that kind of appearance from those who work for them. Someone has said that it’s smart to dress a level above your position. That might be good advice in some organizations and it would demonstrate that you are serious about moving up in the company.
Have you ever seen someone do great damage to themselves by the way they treated their manager? We’re looking at mistakes to avoid with your manager.
Remember the first three mistakes are:
complaining about your boss, showing up your boss, and not understanding generational differences.
Here’s the next mistake:
Mistake 4: Displaying Negative Attitudes in Meetings
Negative attitudes are always harmful, but I’ve noticed that a person who seems to always have some negative comment in meetings can really do themselves great harm. Obviously, you should feel free to express your opinions and suggestions, but often it’s just the way you do it that makes all the difference. Someone told me early in my career that if you’re going to voice a problem, always follow it with a solution. You don’t want to develop a reputation that you are never happy with what’s happening. Even if it just shows on your face, it is not working to your benefit. It is not good for you to be put in a “I’m never happy” mold.
Proverbs 17:22 gives us some good advice: A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. Keeping a generally cheerful attitude and demeanor will make you more attractive, more appealing, someone people want to be with. So, think about what kind of attitude you generally portray, and make sure you come across as a person who sees the glass as half full! Your boss will appreciate that very much.
Mistake 5: Not Being Able to Handle Feedback
The only way any of us grow and mature is to become aware of areas in our life that need improvement. That means we need feedback from our managers at times, even if it is a bit hard to handle. For sure, none of us enjoy being told we need to improve, but if you develop a reputation that you can’t take honest criticism, you will stunt your growth as a person and in your career.
Proverbs 12:1 says: Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but whoever hates correction is stupid. And again in Proverbs 15:31: Whoever heeds life-giving correction will be at home among the wise. Life-giving correction is the perfect terminology for constructive criticism, even if you feel it was not given in a good way. Be willing to hear and then truly consider any criticism that comes your way. Don’t make the mistake of not being able to handle feedback.
How well do you get along with your boss? Here is mistake number two to avoid.
Mistake 2: Showing Up Your Boss
It seems that some people think they have to show up the boss in order to make a name for themselves, but intentionally trying to outshine your boss is one of the biggest mistakes you can make. The exception to this would be if you discover that your boss is corrupt or illegal in some way, which is rare, but otherwise, it is in your best interest to make your boss look good. Think of ways to make their job easier; when you can, go the extra mile to take some workload off of them. They are in a position to help you or harm you, so be sure to avoid this mistake.
1 Peter 5:6 says Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Making your boss look good may indeed require some humility on your part, where you don’t get the credit you think you deserve. But it is one way to humble yourself, and that is a Christian discipline we all need to learn to practice.
Mistake 3: Not Understanding Generational Differences
No doubt you have discovered that different generations see things very differently! And frequently your manager’s generation is not the same as yours. Whether older or younger, you can make some serious mistakes in dealing with your manager if you don’t understand and make allowances for these generational differences.
For example, punctuality doesn’t seem to be as important to younger generations as it is to the older groups. Older types put a high value on being on time for work, for meetings, meeting deadlines, etc. Younger generations seem to be more “laid back,” as we say, and have an attitude that if the job gets done, we shouldn’t worry about such small things as being on time. Believe me, if your boss thinks punctuality is important, you should make it important.
I have observed people who truly did great harm to their careers simply by being unwilling to conform to reasonable expectations from their boss or company. Remember—it’s your job to get along with your boss not your boss’s job to get along with you. That may sound a little strange to you, but for the most part, it is good advice.
If you are a Christian in the working world, working for someone else, you know that your manager or employer can have a lot of influence on your success in your job and in your career. So, it just makes sense that you would want to avoid any mistakes you can in that relationship.
Proverbs 16:16 says: How much better to get wisdom than gold, to get insight rather than silver!
Wisdom is more valuable than money. Getting wisdom on your job is better than getting a raise! And Proverbs 13:10b says that “wisdom is found in those who take advice.” I’m going to share a little wise advice that just might help you avoid some mistakes in dealing with your manager or employer—or the person in authority over you.
Mistake 1: Complaining about Your Manager.
I would say that it is inevitable that you won’t like everything your manager does. There is bound to be something in their style or skills that you don’t agree with or you feel is ineffective. I can tell you from experience that managers are easy targets for complaining and griping in most organizations.
A man I worked with in my first sales job gave me a good piece of advice, which was: It’s your job to get along with your manager, not your manager’s job to get along with you. That probably goes against our culture today, but let me tell you, that attitude will work very well for you. I know—not all managers are good at their job. I know—not all managers are good communicators. And some managers or employers are pretty close to impossible. I know! But as long as you report to that person, you will do yourself a favor to remember that it’s your job to get along with your manager, not your manager’s job to get along with you!
One of the favorite past-times of many employees is to bad-mouth the boss and the company. If you’re wise, you will avoid that like the plague. Ecclesiastes 10:20 says:
Do not revile the king even in your thoughts, or curse the rich in your bedroom, because a bird in the sky may carry your words, and a bird on the wing may report what you say.
What wise Solomon is telling us is that talking behind the back of someone in authority, saying things you wouldn’t say to their face, will almost always backfire on you. Somehow those grumblings make their way back to that person, and they find out what you’ve said. Some little bird tells them! And that is a mistake you want to avoid.
There is power in asking. Think about it in the business world. Selling is asking, isn’t it? I remember when training for sales with IBM I was taught to ask for the order and not to be shy about it. To ask again and again. And I was carefully taught how to ask. So, there’s no doubt that there is power in asking. So, why are we often shy and reticent to ask for something?
Well, for one reason, asking for something is humbling, isn’t it? It’s admitting a need and acknowledging that you don’t have total control in some area. You need something that you don’t have and you have to admit it.
Also, asking sets you up for rejection. The answer could be “No.” Recently I was in a position of asking for something really significant; it wasn’t for myself but for an important project at my church. I knew who to ask, but for weeks I procrastinated about asking because I didn’t want to get a negative response. When finally I asked, the reception I received was far more favorable and pleasant than I had imagined. But regardless of the response to my request, as long as I didn’t ask there was no way I was going to get it!
There was a lot of pride in my attitude toward asking. If the answer was no, I would have to tell everyone involved and I might look foolish. Or I might lose their confidence in me. So, instead of asking, I wasted time worrying about how I would look to others if the answer was no. Not only foolish of me, but prideful as well.
In the book of James we read, “You do not have because you do not ask God” (James 4:2b). I wonder how many blessings we’ve missed for ourselves and others because we simply have not asked God. Please understand, I’m not talking about asking for frivolous things or for selfish reasons. But as Christ-followers we have a Heavenly Father who invites us to ask him for what we truly need, for blessings for ourselves and others. He expects us, as his children, to ask him for help, and yet how often we do not have what he would give us because we do not ask.
A few years ago I was stuck in an airport for two days because of weather-related cancellations, trying to get home, trying to locate my luggage, standing in long lines and hoping to get on a flight soon. As I was standing in one long line with probably fifty other people, a woman who looked like she had some authority walked by, and I just nicely stopped her and asked her a question. She said, “Come to my office,” so I followed her and for about an hour she made phone calls and arrangements, and I walked out of there with a free hotel for the night and a seat on a flight the next day. I asked and got special treatment, not because I deserved it anymore than the others in that line, but because I asked.
As I said earlier, studies show that women are far more reluctant to ask things for themselves than men are. For example, men are more likely to ask for a raise than women are, and when they do ask, women ask for much less than men do. Women will freely ask for the benefit of others but are reluctant to ask something for themselves.
Notice how freely children ask for things. They don’t hesitate to ask Mom or Dad for whatever it is they want at the moment. And they keep asking until often we parents give in just because they keep asking. Jesus told a parable about a widow who kept asking an uncaring and unkind judge for justice against her adversary. Finally the judge decides to grant her request, not because he wanted to do the right thing, but because she kept bothering him. Jesus said, “And will not God bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off? I tell you, he will see that they get justice, and quickly” (Luke 18:7-8a).
In other words, we have a kind and loving God to ask, not a wicked judge, and yet often we give up asking him to meet our needs. Jesus taught us to keep on asking; don’t quit. What have you given up on asking for?
Shame is that terrible, usually private feeling that something is wrong with you. That feeling may come from your past sins, or from lies you’ve believed about yourself, from abusive treatment you may have received from others—there are any number of triggers that can cause you to feel shame. Sometimes these feelings of shame may lie dormant for long periods of time, when things are going well in your life, but when you find yourself in periods of great stress, that shame can surface and cause great harm. You may think you’ve got that shame under control, but if you’ve never asked Jesus to heal you of that shame, don’t be surprised to discover that it will keep raising its ugly head every chance it gets.
Here’s more good news about how we can be delivered from the bondage of shame. Any time you feel that shame, if you will at that moment recognize that it is a lie from the pit of hell, and deal with those feelings of shame right then, you can confront the causes of that shame and address it head on.
For example, if you start thinking those thoughts of shame today, instead of indulging in them, find some place where you can be alone for a few minutes, and address those lies. Refuse to accept that shame; talk to God and ask for strength to put those wrong thoughts out of your mind and replace them with truth. And talk back to your enemy, Satan, telling him you are not fooled by his lies and you refuse to be condemned by him, because there is no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus.
As you become more and more aware of how those thoughts of shame invade your mind, and you stop each time to confront them and reject them, you will be building spiritual muscle and you will be fighting back with the powerful divine weapons that we have to demolish strongholds, as we read in 2 Corinthians 10. Quote scripture to those feelings of shame; talk out loud to them if you can, and remind yourself who you are in Christ. You do not have to accept that shame any longer. Jesus came to set you free.
Galatians 5:1 says, “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.” You can know freedom from the bondage of shame if you continually stand firm against the lies of Satan.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
So many of God’s people are still saddled with shame but be assured that Jesus wants to set us free from our shame. He doesn’t want his children walking around with a backpack full of shame holding them down.
If you are harboring shame, have you asked yourself what lies you are believing about yourself? Shame attacks us personally; makes us believe that we are worthless and failures instead of living in the truth of who we are in Christ—new creations. If you can look back to where your shame began and bring that place to Jesus for healing, you will then be able to start unraveling this collection of shame which you’ve been carrying around for far too long.
Shame affects all of your relationships. First, it affects your relationship with God. Instead of approaching God’s throne of grace with confidence, shame makes you want to hide from God, like Adam and Eve did when they saw their shame after they sinned. So, that shame keeps you from praying and from God’s Word, and often from fellowship with other believers. You don’t see yourself clothed in the righteousness of Jesus Christ, which is your true condition as a born-again believer in Jesus Christ, but you see yourself in your own tattered clothes, and you forget that God has forgiven you and removed your sin from you and remembers it no more.
Shame also affects your relationships with others. It pushes you to isolate because you feel exposed. And when you harbor shame on and on, it feels so terrible that it opens the door to uncontrollable emotions like anger and rage and can cause you to lash out at others and cause damage to those relationships, all because of this shame which is holding you in bondage.
One woman told how she learned to discard shame using a physical gesture of throwing her hands in the air and saying, “I release this shame; this shame does not belong to me.” This can be a powerful way to reinforce your decision to let go of the shame in your heart. Jesus scorned shame—rejected it—and we can do that, too.
Your most powerful weapon against shame is the truth of God’s Word. Use it to begin your pathway to freedom from shame.
What is the pathway to freedom from the bondage of shame? We harbor shame when we look at our past failures so much that we see ourselves as failures. We harbor shame when we believe lies that have been told to us or ones we’ve manufactured in our minds, telling us that we have no worth or little value.
As disciples of Jesus Christ, there is a pathway to freedom from shame. This passage from 2 Corinthians 10:4-5 shows us how to defeat shame: The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. Shame is a pretension that tries to destroy the truth about God and about who you are as created in God’s image. It pretends to be the truth, but it is not. And it is an argument; that means, it is a battle in your mind and for your mind. The enemy of your soul, Satan, is an absolutely expert liar—that is his language and he speaks it well. If you are caught in the bondage of shame, it is because you have believed his lies about who you are and you have not used the weapons we have been given to demolish that stronghold of bondage.
There is a pathway to freedom from this bondage, and it is bringing those thoughts of shame into captivity and making them obedient to Christ. How do we do that? By defusing Satan’s lies with God’s truth, and the truth is that as a child of God, you have been cleansed from all shame. Let us draw near to God with a sincere heart and with the full assurance that faith brings, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water (Hebrews 10:22).
Put this verse on a card; carry it with you at all times. And use this as your divine weapon to demolish the stronghold of shame. Read it every time you feel shame. Read it over and over; memorize it. You have divine power to find the pathway to freedom from shame through Jesus Christ.
During his earthly ministry the enemies of Jesus were continually trying to shame him. Though he was totally innocent of any sin, they were always accusing him of some sin or another. The Bible says that in that day anyone who was hung from a cross was cursed. It was the worst disgrace that the enemies of Jesus could come up with to try to shame him.
Yet, listen to this truth from Hebrews 12:2b: For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.
He endured the cross because that was the only way to pay for our sins. But he scorned the shame. Do you know what scorn means? It means to feel or express contempt or derision for something. Jesus had contempt for shame—he refused to take it on. The cross was considered an instrument of shame, true, but Jesus scorned that shame. He endured the suffering of the cross but refused the shame. His cross was not a cross of shame, it was a cross of redemption, of salvation.
What do we often do? We run from the suffering, whatever that may be, trying to avoid any kind of pain, but we take on the shame, embracing it as though it were truth. Shame is always a lie, because shame attacks who we are. No matter what we’ve done, regardless of what is in our past, it does not change our value as people created and loved by God. Shame is a lie that says we have little or no worth, so we should always reject it, no matter how it feels, because it is not truth.
Jesus scorned shame and we should too. Your shame is rooted in something that you did or something that was done to you or in some lies about yourself that you have believed. It is helpful if you can find that place where shame began to accumulate in your life and then ask Jesus to heal that wound. Then the battle is in your mind—you must learn to reject the thoughts of shame, replace them with the truth of God’s Word, and learn to live in the freedom that Jesus offers you.
How can we be set free from the bondage of shame?
First, let’s talk about the difference between guilt and shame. I’ve written a book on guilt—Why Do I Always Feel Guilty?—but I believe that shame is even more harmful than guilt. True guilt is recognizing what you’ve done that is wrong, while shame is seeing yourself as a failure because of what you’ve done or lies you have believed.
Shame is believing there is something wrong with you and you are basically defective in some way. The enemy of your soul wants to keep you and me in bondage to guilt and he wants to turn that guilt into shame. Guilt turns to shame when we think about it and keep remembering it, or when we fail to confess our guilt and find forgiveness. But sadly, many who have asked for and received forgiveness from God for something in their pasts still harbor the shame of that past.
Do you remember that Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden were free from shame until they sinned? In Genesis 2:25 we read: “Adam and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame.” However, with sin shame entered their lives, and their eyes were opened to their nakedness. Then they ran from God and tried to hide. Shame caused them to try to isolate and cover up.
Shame almost always causes us to hide from others because we’re fearful of being found out. We don’t want others to see our shame, just like Adam and Eve. We might talk about our guilt, but we’re less likely to talk about our shame. So, we keep it inside and it begins to accumulate. Many people have accumulated shame from childhood for all kinds of reasons, and that accumulated shame doesn’t go away with time. Often it comes to the surface in very destructive ways in times of stress or fear.
The good news is that because of Jesus we can be set free from the bondage of shame. If you are a true Christ-follower, born into the family of God by faith in Jesus Christ, you have been given the pathway to freedom from shame.
If you or I were given the assignment to determine how the sins of mankind could be forgiven, would we ever have come up with a plan that God becomes man and dies? The disciples certainly had difficulty hearing Jesus when he repeatedly told them that he had come to die, not to get rid of the Roman rule in Israel and establish himself as the ruler. Even though there were many clues and prophecies from the Old Testament showing that the coming Messiah would die, their belief at the time was that Jesus was Messiah and he had come to save them from Rome, not from their sins.
I’ve been trying to put myself in the shoes of those disciples as they grappled with Jesus’ mission. Clearly Jesus said to them, “the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many” (Matthew 20:28). He told them that he was the Good Shepherd and the good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep. He even gave them an indication of the kind of death he would die when he said, “Just as Moses lifted up the snake in the wilderness, so the Son of Man must be lifted up” (John 3:14). But they just couldn’t hear it because what kind of god dies?
Only the true eternal God would have put this plan in place. To send his only Son who was equal with God the Father for the purpose of dying could only come from the mind and heart of God himself.
Then think of this—the way Jesus died was not only the most painful and horrendous way to die, the Jews considered that any crucified person was condemned by God. Don’t you imagine that in those early days following the crucifixion, the disciples were struggling to understand why Jesus had to die, and why he died on a cross? He died this ignominious death and all along they thought he was from God—which of course he was—but how could he be from God and die on a cross?
If I had been in the shoes of those disciples at that time, I’m sure I would have struggled with understanding that the Messiah—the one I had faithfully followed for over three years, the one I hoped was going to redeem Israel from Rome—Jesus was going to die on a cross under God’s curse. No doubt they knew the passage from Deuteronomy 21:23 which says that “anyone who is hung on a tree is under God’s curse.”
By crucifying Jesus, the Jewish leaders no doubt thought that this would be the end of this troublemaker and his followers. Surely those pesky disciples would give up after Jesus was hung on a cross. This helps us understand why they went into hiding after the crucifixion and were frightened that they would be found out. They were bearing not only the grief of losing Jesus, but the shame and disgrace of the way he was killed—on a cross.
A crucified Messiah was not their idea of a hero, a Savior, their hope. So, why did God send Jesus to die and why did he have to die on a cross? What kind of god dies?
Well, with clear hindsight now and with the New Testament to explain it to us, we can look back and see why God the Son had to die—and yes, even his method of death, a cross, was part of God’s plan. Remember, no one took Jesus’ life from him; he gave it. This was all part of God’s eternal plan, every detail of his death was predetermined by God.
The reason Jesus had to die was because sin has consequences and a Holy God cannot just overlook sin. The price had to be paid for sin; this is what God declared. He does not ignore our sins, but he makes it possible for our sins to be taken care of in Jesus Christ.
Even if each of us were to pay for our sins, we would simply die in our sins. We would pay the price—death—but there would be no redemption. Jesus paid the price for our sins. Because he was the perfect Son of God, he was qualified to die for our sins because he did not have to die for his own sins. He took our sins on himself and paid the price we could never pay so that those sins could be forgiven and we could have access to God through Jesus and his sacrifice.
Furthermore,
Fran and her friend Louise are facing a decision about some training that is being required by their company concerning new policies on protecting those in the LGBTQ community in the company against discrimination. A long discussion between them has revealed that Louise believes they must take a stand and refuse to go to this training, even risking their jobs if necessary, because a line has to be drawn here. Fran thinks that would be perceived as unkind and un-Christlike, and wonders if it is really necessary.
They have decided to postpone any decision until they have prayed about it—together and individually. And so, after a time of prayer on this Friday evening, they are once more united in their love for each other and their desire to always seek to do what is right, whether it is popular or not, and even if it is costly, like, in this case, potentially losing their jobs.
“Well, Louise,” Fran says, “do you still think you should refuse to go to this training?”
“Fran, I think I do but I also think it’s time we sought some advice from a pastor or someone who can help us think this through.” On this they agree and Fran suggests one of their pastors who is a really clear thinker on issues like this. And so, the decision is delayed.
You may be thinking that I’ve taken the easy way out in this episode—to leave this matter hanging without taking one side or the other. But honestly, I believe in this day of political correctness, we will be facing such decisions more and more as Christ-followers, and the real take away from this episode is not to make hasty decisions when those decisions are not totally clear but pray and seek advice. But on the other hand, if and when you face very black and white situations that are clearly right or wrong, you and I have to be prepared to take the unpopular and costly stand.
And another important take away is that as Christians, we need to always be willing to listen to each other and pray with each other, even when we disagree, or especially when we disagree. Jesus said the world will know we are his followers if we love one another. That should always be a high priority.
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Fran’s company is requiring employees to attend a training on company policies about LGBTQ employees to make certain they are not discriminated against. Fran and her friend Louise, fellow believers, have differing views as to whether they should refuse to attend this training and take a strong stand for their beliefs, or whether that would be regarded as unkind and un-Christlike.
I’m not suggesting that I have the answer to these many issues we face in our post-Christian America, but here are some thoughts to consider. First remember what Jesus said from Mark 8:38: “If anyone is ashamed of me and my words in this adulterous and sinful generation, the Son of Man will be ashamed of them when he comes in his Father’s glory with the holy angels.”
Jesus did not promise popularity for us when we become his disciples. In fact, he promised the opposite. He called his generation—his culture—an “adulterous and sinful” one, so what we face is not unique. It’s always been true that the world is not a friend to Jesus.
The Bible’s teaching on contested issues today, such as abortion, sexuality, or any of our beliefs, is admittedly not always popular. It wasn’t popular in New Testament times either, and the early church had to repeatedly decide if they would “follow Jesus, no turning back” or not. So, if being popular is our goal, we will be swept up into a politically correct world and are likely to compromise in order to be accepted and liked.
Jesus showed no inclination to be politically correct in his day, did he? He was at odds against the religious leaders of his people and said so in direct and very confrontational words. They did not like him, that’s for sure. On the other hand, he showed such incredible grace and love to the worst in their society and was never reluctant to associate with them, eat with them, talk to them, heal them.
Someone has said that we must not allow our counter-cultural posture to become anti-cultural. That’s the challenge we face. As Christians, we are to be compelled by the love of Christ to extend kindness and friendship to those who disagree with us.
Jesus prayed for us that we would be in this world but not of this world. And as Fran and Louise face this hypothetical decision about the new policies of their company, they need to find that balance and know how Jesus is leading them in this moment.
I doubt if many would disagree that we are in the midst of major cultural shifts. And as Christ-followers, we have to decide how we navigate this sea change. How and when do we draw the line between showing love and compassion for people who have anti-biblical beliefs and lifestyles, and when it’s time to take a stand for what the Bible teaches?
That’s the dilemma Fran is facing now as her company is requiring attendance at a training session on how to accept and appreciate LGBTQ people on the job. Louise, her good friend who is also a believer, thinks it’s time now to take a stand and refuse to attend this training as it goes against her faith.
The two of them are having a somewhat heated discussion about how to respond. In fact, Louise has decided not to attend the training and thinks Fran and every believer in the company should do the same.
“Louise,” Fran says, “have you thought that a decision to refuse to attend the training might be an over-reaction, and that it could backfire on us and make us seem unreasonable and unkind?”
“Fran,” Louise says, “you’re my good friend but I think you may have been swept up into this politically correct culture without realizing it. You know, this offensive against our Christian beliefs comes on little by little and we’re just sitting back and doing nothing. Could it be that you’re too concerned about what people will think about you and not concerned enough about how our rights are being taken away?”
Fran responds, “Well, I agree that we do need to be courageous and stand for what we believe, but I’m just not making the connection between that and this training the company is planning to do. You see this as part of this slippery slope, I guess, and I don’t” Fran says.
“Here’s what I think,” Louise says. “This training will require us to deny some of our beliefs and I’m not willing to do that. That’s how I see it,” Louise says with a final note in her voice.
Fran says. “Maybe we could pray about this and ask for guidance; maybe take a couple of days before we decide—what do you think?”
After a long pause in the conversation, Louise says, “Well, it’s always right to pray, and the training is a month away, so we have time before we have to respond. Okay, when can we pray?”
They decide to get together Friday evening for prayer, and with that they say good night.
Fran’s company is requiring all employees to attend a training session on LGBTQ employees, what their rights are and how they are to be treated.
Fran’s good friend, Louise, seems to be very concerned about being required to attend this training, as she thinks it requires her as a Christ-follower to accept beliefs that she does not agree with. Fran doesn’t feel as strongly as Louise does because as Frans sees it, this training is just about treating LGBTQ people with respect and not discriminating against them—which Fran feels is right and they do it anyway. But Louise feels that Fran doesn’t see the whole picture.
“Fran,” she says, “we have to stand for what we believe and not be intimidated by this culture. Everyday you hear about new attacks on our Christian beliefs. They let boys—you know, cross gender girls who were boys—compete in women’s sports and that’s not fair.”
“Well, I understand what you’re saying, but that’s not really what this training is about, is it?” Fran tries to stay calm.
“Like I said, Fran, this is just step one. If we don’t take a stand, who knows what will be next?” And with that, Louise leaves Fran’s office.
Whew, Fran thinks, Louise is really upset. I’ll call her tonight and talk more. So, that evening after the kids are in bed, Fran calls Louise to continue their conversation. “Louise, I didn’t mean to upset you today, and maybe I’m missing something here, but I just don’t see the danger in this training.”
“Fran, I talked with my friend at church tonight, and she agrees with me that if we don’t take a stand now and let the company know our opposition to this kind of training, it will just keep on going. So, I’ve decided to tell Ben that I’m choosing not to go to this training because it is against my beliefs. I know they might fire me for it—who knows? But I think I have to do it to stand true for Jesus.”
Whoa, Fran thinks to herself. Louise is taking this much more seriously than I am. Is she right? She says, “Louise, can you tell me how you came to that decision? Maybe I’m missing something here.”
“You are, Fran—like many other Christians, I think. Our culture is quickly becoming anti-Christian and if we just sit back and do nothing, before you know it, we’ll be told to approve of abortion, same-sex marriage, all the things that are against our Christian beliefs,” Louise tells Fran.
It seems that Fran and Louise have different takes on this particular training and their responsibility as Christ-followers. What do you think? Should Fran go along with Louise and refuse to go to this training?
Following is another episode of Fran and Jesus on the Job, my fictional story of a single mom who is learning to let Jesus guide her and use her as an ambassador for him in her working world.
As she is working at her desk, her friend, Louise, a fellow believer, walks into her office and shuts the door behind her. “What is it, Louise?” Fran asks. “What’s happened? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
“Fran, have you read this latest memo from the home office? Listen to this,” Louise reads from her phone:
In order to make certain that our company provides adequate protection for all of our employees and is compliant with Federal and State guidelines, everyone is required to attend a training session addressing these concerns. These are two-hour sessions which will be conducted by an outside organization and will focus on our individual responsibility to affirm and respect everyone in our company. Please select the day you can attend and sign up below.”
“I have not seen that,” Fran replies. “What do you think it’s all about, Louise?”
“Oh I know what it’s all about. I talked to Sandra in HR—you’ve met her.”
“Yes, I know her—she is a fellow believer. I like her a lot,” Fran replies.
“Well, she told me that this training is to tell us how we are to treat LGBTQ people. She said they are making new policies on how we address them, especially cross-gender people, and stuff like that,” Louise says with anxiety in her voice.
“I don’t see a big problem with that, Louise. Do you?” Fran says.
“Well, yeah, I do. They’re trying to make us accept what is against our belief—our doctrine. This is the politically correct culture gone amuck, Fran. This is just step one; what will be next?” Louise is truly upset about it.
Fran gives it some thought. “Louise, we already treat these people like we treat anyone else, right? So, they’re not going to make us do anything we don’t do already—that’s the way I see it. If they just want us to never discriminate and always treat them with respect, I can agree with that. That’s what I think Jesus would do.”
“You just don’t get it, do you Fran?” Louise says with some frustration.
Well, is Louise right? Does Fran just not get it?
Do you remember how Jesus acquired the use of the donkey for the most important parade ever—as he entered Jerusalem on what we now call Palm Sunday? I would love to have been the proverbial “fly on the wall” to see the look on the faces of the owners of that donkey when the disciples just walked up and started to untie it. As I was re-reading that story, it dawned on me that lots of us have things tied up, too, and if we'd untie them, they'd be of service to our Lord.
Let me read that passage from Luke 19 that tells this story about the donkey:
After Jesus had said this, he went on ahead, going up to Jerusalem. As he approached Bethphage and Bethany at the hill called the Mount of Olives, he sent two of his disciples, saying to them, “Go to the village ahead of you, and as you enter it, you will find a colt tied there, which no one has ever ridden. Untie it and bring it here. If anyone asks you, ‘Why are you untying it?’ say, ‘The Lord needs it.’”
Those who were sent ahead went and found it just as he had told them. As they were untying the colt, its owners asked them, “Why are you untying the colt?” They replied, “The Lord needs it.” They brought it to Jesus, threw their cloaks on the colt and put Jesus on it. As he went along, people spread their cloaks on the road (Luke 19:28-36).
This happened just a week before the crucifixion. It’s a really interesting scene, when you think about it. Jesus chose that colt to ride in his one and only parade. He knew where it was, he knew that it had never been ridden, and he knew what the reaction of the owners of the colt would be. How could he know all this? Because he is God, and though he was fully man in his 33 years on earth, he was nonetheless fully God, and God is all-knowing.
Interesting that the disciples evidently did not question Jesus' instructions. But then, after three years with him, they should have been very certain that what Jesus told them could be totally trusted. However, it had to take a little bit of nerve to walk up to this colt and start untying it. You have to give those disciples credit for their faith and obedience in this matter.
As they were untying the colt, the owners approached them. Why there was more than one owner, I don't know, except I can guess that neither could afford the colt himself, so they formed a partnership and bought it together. Could it be that these owners were poor people without a great deal of this world's possessions? Quite possibly. I doubt that a donkey's colt was a very prestigious animal. Not what kings and wealthy people chose for transportation. But likely it was all these simple owners could afford.
I can also imagine that they were a little perturbed to see two strangers taking their prized colt—evidently a young colt, since it had never been ridden. Can you put yourselves in their shoes? I wonder if they screamed at the disciples: "Why are you untying our colt?” I wonder if they were upset? I think I would have been.
At any rate, when the disciples explained that Jesus had requested to use this colt, this one particular colt, it seems to put an end to the entire discussion. Without another question, they give the colt to the disciples for Jesus to use. I have to believe they had heard about Jesus. I'm sure most everyone in the area had by that time.
Perhaps they had heard him speak at some time; maybe they'd seen him heal someone or cast out a demon. Their willingness to let go of a valuable possession so unquestioningly leads me to believe that Jesus was someone they knew about, someone they respected, perhaps even loved.
As I read this story, I thought, "What do I have tied up that the Lord wants to use?” I think many times we've got resources and abilities that God would use in his service, but they're all tied up. We're using them for our own selfish purposes, or failing to use them at all perhaps, instead of giving them back to God for his eternal purposes.
Would you have ever guessed that a man from the Old Testament could offer us a godly role model for Christians in the marketplace today? If you haven’t read the book of Daniel lately, I encourage you to do so, because there’s so much there to encourage us in our lives today.
As you read his story, you will see that:
Daniel’s greatest testimony was his work habits and dedication to doing his job right.
Daniel got a promotion from Darius, new king of Babylon, and was made one of three administrators over all the satraps. We read, “Now Daniel so distinguished himself among the administrators and the satraps by his exceptional qualities that the king planned to set him over the whole kingdom” (Daniel 6:3). This caused much jealousy among the satraps, so they set out to find something against Daniel in his conduct of government affairs, but they were unable to do so.
“They could find no corruption in him, because he was trustworthy and neither corrupt nor negligent” (Daniel 6:4b).
What a testimony! Neither corrupt nor negligent. I never really think of myself as corrupt, do you? Yet take a look at what comes under the heading of corrupt:
Being guilty of dishonest practices like
cheating on the expense account, using company assets for your own benefit, disloyal to your employer, giving reports that exaggerate the good and overlook the bad,
to name a few.
And even if we pass the corrupt test, here comes “never negligent.”
You mean, never neglecting to do what you’re supposed to do? Never? Always giving it all you’ve got? Always? Never failing to fulfill promises and follow-up as required? Never? Never overlooking the stuff you hate to do and leaving it undone? Never?
I’m guilty! I wouldn’t want my work habits to be as closely scrutinized as Daniel’s were. With all those satraps looking for something to hang him with, they could find nothing. Daniel must have slept well at night!
Do you see why Daniel gives us such a great role model of a Christian working in the secular workplace?
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Do you thoroughly like and enjoy everyone you work with and for? I hope so; that would be ideal. But the facts are, there often are certain coworkers who aren’t so easy to like.
Daniel had some very difficult coworkers too, people who were out to do him harm. People who were very jealous of him and wanted to bring him down. But in spite of their attitudes, Daniel kept his attitude right:
Daniel had a compassionate heart for his “co-workers.”
When Nebuchadnezzar was ready to kill the wise men of Babylon because they could not interpret his dream, Daniel went to Arioch, the commander of the king’s guard, and interceded for these men. “Why did the king issue such a harsh decree?” he asked. Now, these men meant nothing to him personally, but he had a compassionate heart and he knew it was wrong to execute them. So, he went to his trusted fellow-Israelites, Hananiah, Mishael and Azariah, and urged them to pray for these men. God then revealed the meaning of the dream to Daniel and the next day he asked Arioch not to kill the wise men, but instead to take him to Nebuchadnezzar because he could interpret the dream.
Talk about sticking your neck out! Daniel was a man of great courage as well as great compassion. He cared about these men, even though they were not fellow-Israelites and indeed were astrologers and sorcerers and enchanters—men who were doing things directly opposed to God’s principles.
It’s not easy to have compassion for people sometimes, is it? Especially those who are antagonistic toward us, or who have no clue about true spirituality. Those whose lifestyles are sinful and against all you know to be right. But as God placed Daniel in the midst of these kind of people, so he does us today as well, and he does it so we can show God’s love and compassion to people who have no clue what it’s all about.
Do you sometimes feel very out-of-place in your work environment? Because we live and work in a fallen world, we are often painfully reminded that as disciples of Jesus Christ, we just don’t fit in socially and culturally where we work. Daniel had that same experience, as he was taken to a foreign land. But there in the midst of a totally secular and pagan culture, he stayed true to his biblical principles and did not allow the culture around him to drag him down to its level.
Jesus prayed specifically for his disciples: “My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one. They are not of the world, even as I am not of it. Sanctify them by the truth; your word is truth” (John 17:15-17).
Daniel was deeply influenced by a letter the prophet Jeremiah sent to the exiles. In Daniel 9:2 we read: “In the first year of his reign, I, Daniel, understood from the Scriptures, according to the word of the Lord given to Jeremiah the prophet, that the desolation of Jerusalem would last seventy years.” That letter, being prophetic in nature, was the Word of God. This is what the Lord Almighty, the God of Israel, says to all those I carried into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon: “Build houses and settle down; plant gardens and eat what they produce. Marry and have sons and daughters. . . Increase in number there; do not decrease. Also, seek the peace and prosperity of the city to which I have carried you into exile. Pray to the Lord for it, because if it prospers, you too will prosper” (Jeremiah 29:4-7). Notice that they were to serve the Lord right there in Babylon, while they were in exile. They were to prosper and work and be involved in the society around them.
I believe God intends for his children to be involved in the pagan culture around us—to work in that culture and be a light in that culture and even be successful in that culture. But we’re never to compromise and adopt the sinful ways of the culture. In the world but not of the world—that is our challenge. Daniel and his three close friends were able to do it very well.
And you’ll note that they knew the Word of God as delivered by the Prophet Jeremiah. Undoubtedly that was one of the main reasons they could stay true to their beliefs, because they knew and believed the Word of God. We have it a bit easier because we have the whole written Word of God, and when we make that an integral part of our lives, it fortifies us to be strong for the Lord and stand true to his principles, as Daniel did.
Did you ever think that an Old Testament saint could be a great role-model for you as a Christian in the marketplace today? I can assure you that Daniel is that man. We’re looking at workplace principles from the life of Daniel. Consider this:
Daniel was taken out of his comfort zone completely, away from familiar people and surroundings, into a different culture altogether.
When you go to work each day, you are likely to be leaving your comfort zone and entering a different kind of world. In writing to the church in Pergamum, Jesus said—through the Apostle John—“I know where you live—where Satan has his throne. Yet you remain true to my name” (Revelation 2:13a). Pergamum was thoroughly pagan, and many Christians were martyred there.
The pagan gods may be a bit different today, but they are there:
The god of materialism The god of success The god of sexual pleasure The god of any kind of pleasure The god of “it’s all about me”
Our challenge is to remain true to the Lord even though we may work in Satan’s territory. Daniel—and his three faithful friends—were fully immersed in a pagan culture. They worked hard and succeeded in that society. But they did not accommodate their lifestyles or beliefs to the pagan world around them. Their approach was obedient involvement. They stayed involved in the world, while at the same time remaining obedient to God and his principles.
This attitude is a big contrast to other Jewish exiles in Babylon recorded in Psalm 137:1-4: By the rivers of Babylon we sat and wept when we remembered Zion. There on the poplars we hung our harps, for there our captors asked us for songs, our tormentors demanded songs of joy; they said, “Sing us one of the songs of Zion!” How can we sing the songs of the Lord while in a foreign land?” Have you ever felt like a foreigner in your working world? Well, that’s because you are, if you’re a Christ-follower. This world is not our home. Peter wrote that we are aliens and strangers in this world.
But Jesus doesn’t want us to “hang our harps on the poplars.” He wants us to sing songs of Zion, even by the rivers of Babylon! A joyful spirit is one of the most powerful weapons we have, both to fight off the enemy, to sustain us—because the joy of the Lord is our strength—and to testify to the foreigners around us that we do have songs of Zion to sing! We have something to sing about!
As Christians in the marketplace, we face a continual challenge of walking that fine line between pursuing our careers and seeking success and being a strong witness for Christ where we work. Integrating our work and our faith is not the easiest thing to do, is it? The choices are not always black and white; the decisions are not always clear. And while we may not have gone to a foreign country and culture as a missionary, there are times when it sure feels like we’re outsiders, foreigners in a culture that is opposed to Christian principles.
The story of Daniel offers us some very important principles for workplace Christians. Let me point out some of the issues that Daniel faced which are not that far from ones you may have encountered.
Daniel was forced into a job he never chose nor ever wanted.
Daniel’s story begins on a very bleak note. He was taken as a captive—a slave—to another country. He had no choice. But even when evil seemed to be in control, God was actually working out his purposes. And through it all, Daniel kept a positive outlook.
Do you ever feel that you’ve been placed in a position you never aspired to? Have you ever felt trapped in your job or your company? If you find yourself in that kind of predicament, it’s easy for your attitude to go south very quickly.
Even if you’re in a job of your choosing, no doubt there are days when you still feel trapped—when you have dreams of running away, catching the next flight out to a far-away place! But it is exactly in these times that the real depth of your faith shows through. Staying positive and joyful in a place where you may not want to be is a sign of a Spirit-controlled life, and it is a strong testimony for the Lord.
Daniel had God-given talents and skills, which he had honed. He was a good steward of his gifts and opportunities.
God had endowed Daniel with a very bright and quick mind, and Daniel had taken that gift and made the most of it, even in a hostile environment. Paul wrote to Timothy, “For this reason, I remind you to fan into a flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands” (2 Timothy 1:6). Have you fanned into a flame the gifts and talents God has placed in you? It’s easy to just settle with getting by. But I’m often convicted that God expects me to take my gifts and make them better. You and I will be accountable for the stewardship of our talents and skills.
Fran had another unpleasant interaction with the administrative assistant in her department, Joyce. Joyce is usually sour and less than helpful, and Fran gets upset with her lousy attitude and work. But Jesus has prompted Fran to pray for Joyce and get to know her better.
Then, at the grocery store, Fran ran into Sue, a neighbor who has been living with a man for about a year. Sue was distraught because Ed has moved out on her, and she obviously wanted someone to talk to.
Although Fran had been looking forward to a quiet evening alone, Jesus urges her to invite Sue over, and not miss this opportunity to show her love and compassion. So, as she prepares supper for her kids, Fran dials Sue's number and invites her over.
Sue eagerly accepts, and Fran knows she has done the right thing. She spends time helping Drew with his homework, and Alice wants to tell her all about school that day. They read a Bible story together and have prayer, then she tucks them in.
Again she thinks, "Wouldn't it be nice to have the evening to myself. How I'd love to curl up and read a book tonight.” Jesus says to her, "I know you've sacrificed to invite Sue over, but you won't be sorry you did."
With that reassurance, the doorbell rings and Fran invites Sue in. She fixes a cup of tea with some of her homemade cookies, and they sit down to talk.
"So, Ed has moved out," Fran says to Sue. "Did you have a fight or something?"
"Just our regular fight. I want to get married, and he keeps finding excuses and delays. Finally I gave him an ultimatum and he moved out. I guess my mom is right—why should they buy the cow if the milk is free!” Fran and Sue chuckle nervously, as they get into this topic.
"Sue," Fran begins, "why do you think you're so upset over Ed leaving? Did you really love him that much?"
"Love," Sue says cynically. "Who knows what love is? Ed is the second man who has told me he loves me but left when it was time to make a commitment. I'm not sure you can find a man who wants anything more than sex."
"Yeah, you can," Fran replies, quietly.
"Oh, I'm sorry, Fran. I forgot about your husband. Too bad the good ones like him have to die young. I don't know how you stand living alone like you do. That's my problem; I can't stand being alone," Sue says. "I have to have a man!"
"I know the feeling, Sue, I've been there," Fran replies.
"Well, how do you cope with it?" Sue asks.
"Well, I cope, Sue, because I have Jesus. I would never have made it without his presence in my life," Fran is eager to share Jesus with Sue.
"I know you're very religious. I've never been really interested in church or anything. Do you think I'd do better if I started going to church? Maybe I could meet a better man there than at the bars," Sue says with a forced laugh.
"Well, it's not religion, Sue, it's a relationship," Fran responds, and with that, a long conversation ensues. Sue and Fran talk for a couple of hours about men and loneliness and singleness, and because she is hurting, Sue listens carefully to what Fran tells her about Jesus.
Realizing how late the hour is, Sue says, "Oh my goodness, I didn't mean to stay so long. But I sure do appreciate your invitation tonight, Fran. I don't know what I would have done—well, it has made a big difference talking to you. I feel like maybe there's hope for me. Maybe we can talk again soon."
"You know, Saturday I'm going to a concert at church. Would you like to join me and the kids?" Fran asks.
"Do you think I'd fit in? I mean…." Sue stammers.
"Of course you'd fit in. I'll pick you up at 6:30.” And with that they say goodnight. Fran stumbles into bed tired but happy and praying as she drops off to sleep that Sue would soon accept Jesus as her Savior.
The next morning as Fran arrives at the office, she looks for Joyce to invite her to lunch. Jesus suggested she get to know this troublesome coworker better, so she decides there's no time like the present.
Can you remember the last time someone wronged you? My guess is you can remember it very well, even if it happened years ago. But by God’s grace, we can be set free from the bondage and pain of wrongs done to us, if we are willing to follow some biblical principles.
The first is to do something good for the person who wronged you. Jesus taught us that principle, and though it seems very hard, it really is effective in lifting the burden and hurt from your heart. The second step I talked about is to humble yourself and be willing to turn it over to God and trust him to resolve as he sees fit.
Now, the third step is to:
Seek reconciliation.
Matthew 5:23-24: “Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.”
I know that it’s not always possible to be reconciled, but Romans 12:18 says: “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” Sometimes it is only possible to achieve partial reconciliation and you may need to set boundaries in reconciliation.
There is so much more to be said on this topic, When You’ve Been Wronged, and that’s why I’m offering a book by Erwin Lutzer, by that title, for a donation in any amount. I want to get this book into your hands if you’re struggling with a wrong done to you because I know it will help you.
If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.
What are some steps you can take to be set free from the bitterness and resentment caused by wrongs done to you? Here is step one:
Do good to the person who wronged you.
If you are willing to make this first step, to do something that requires you to make a personal sacrifice, it could begin the healing process.
Romans 12:14: “Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse.”
Matthew 5:44: “But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.”
Speak well of them in private and public. No matter how troublesome they are, there is something good to be said. If not, just don’t say anything. Do not let the wrong this person has done to you cause you to sin. Do not disparage them to others. Don’t tell anyone you don’t have to tell.
I know this is hard; it goes against all your natural tendencies. But we are called—and empowered—to live above our natural tendencies, as disciples of Jesus Christ. Because of the Holy Spirit who lives within us, we can actually do good to someone who has wronged us, because we do it in obedience to the Lord and out of love to him. Then we trust the results to him. It’s not a manipulation technique to try to change the other person; it’s an act of obedience out of love for Jesus.
Are you willing to take that first step and actually do something good for the person who has wronged you? You will be amazed at how that will make a difference for you.
Humble yourself before God.
James 4:10: “Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.”
1 Peter 5:6: “Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time.”
It is humbling to give up your right for revenge, to give up your hurt feelings, to give up taking your pain out on others. But if you will humble yourself, then God won’t have to humble you, and he will lift you up—in due time!
One of the deceptive results that can happen to us when we’ve been wronged is that it can cause us to become walled in by bitterness and that can make us to blind to our own personal failings. It creates blind spots to our own faults.
1 John 2:11: “But anyone who hates a brother or sister is in the darkness and walks around in the darkness. They do not know where they are going, because the darkness has blinded them.”
The wrongs done to us can easily lead us into hatred, whether we recognize that or not. And hatred causes blindness—we become blind to our own failings.
We can justify our wounding others because we have been wounded. For example, you may think that the wrong done to you is so deep that nothing you do could be as bad as what has been done to you—so you let yourself off the hook.
You may not even realize that you’re taking that hurt out on innocent people. This is especially true if it is not possible to confront the one who has wronged you, or if they are not willing to own up to what they have done. Or in some cases, if they are not still alive.
I recognize that this topic of the wrongs done to us cannot be resolved easily, but we can begin to make first steps toward being set free from the bitterness and hatred which can result because we’ve been wronged.
Has someone wronged you recently? There are several common wrongs: betrayal, broken promises, broken confidences, abuse, false accusations. These are just a few, but what about the power that a nurtured wrong can have over us?
Dr. Erwin Lutzer writes in his book, When You’ve Been Wronged: “Talk to some offended people and they will spill out their resentment to anyone who is willing to listen. You’d think that the offense happened yesterday, last month, or last year. Turns out it happened twenty years ago, but the wound is constantly opened, constantly talked about, or constantly used as an excuse for one thing or another.” (Lutzer, p. 38) When you keep holding onto a wrong done to you, keep thinking about it and re-living, then you may be allowing that wrong to gain such a foothold in your life that it simply continues to re-hurt you over and over again.
When we nurture a wrong done to us, it quickly turns into bitterness, and here’s what bitterness does:
Hebrews 12:15: “See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many.”
First, it grows. When you allow bitterness to take root in your heart, it will grow and grow fast. Before you know it, those roots will dig down into your heart and grow like a weed. You cannot harbor even a little bitterness in your heart. It won't stay small. It always grows.
Second, it causes trouble. When you nurture a wrong done to you and feed it, count on it causing you a great deal of trouble. Physical trouble—it affects your health adversely—emotional and mental trouble.
Third, it defiles many. Funny thing is, when we keep nurturing the wrongs done to us, it affects all of our relationships—not just the one who has wronged us. As parents we can transfer that bitter spirit to our children; as managers and employees we can transfer it to our co-workers. It is a poison that affects everyone it touches.
While I certainly don’t want to trivialize the wrongs that have been done to you, I do want to help you start to find healing.
Have you noticed how selective our memories can be? You and I can remember the wrongs done to us forever, but so easily forget good things!
How do we begin to deal with the wrongs done to us? Let’s identify some of the more common ones:
Betrayal: When you are betrayed—particularly if you are betrayed by someone close to you, whom you trusted—that is a deep hurt. David expressed this in Psalm 55:12-14: If an enemy were insulting me, I could endure it; if a foe were rising against me, I could hide. But it is you, a man like myself, my companion, my close friend, with whom I once enjoyed sweet fellowship at the house of God, as we walked about among the worshipers. This is why betrayal within families is so hurtful and so difficult to overcome. It comes from someone—a mate, a child, a sister, a brother, a parent—who we rightly expect to never betray us, and yet they do.
Broken Promises: Proverbs 13:12: “Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.”
A “deferred hope” is a broken promise, and it makes us heart-sick.
Broken Confidences: When you share your heart with someone, and you expect them to keep your confidence, it can be devastating to discover that they have repeated it to others.
Proverbs 11:13: “A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy person keeps a secret.”
False Accusations: Whether it’s a lie told about you by a jealous person, or a legal battle in a court of law, false accusations can run very deep, and build walls up so high they seem virtually impossible to bring down.
Abuse: Abuse comes in many forms and it is prevalent in our worlds.
These are just a few examples of the wrongs done to us. But here’s some good news:
Isaiah 54:17a: “No weapon forged against you will prevail, and you will refute every tongue that accuses you.”
Psalm 9:9: “The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble.”
On this particular day Fran is rushing to get a proposal finished for an early meeting tomorrow with a new client. She talks to the Jesus, as she has learned to do throughout her day. "You know, Jesus, I'll be glad when this is finished; Ben made a few more changes. Now I've got to get Joyce to make the changes and re-print it. Jesus, I just dread even approaching Joyce. She has such a rotten attitude. When you ask her to do anything, she's as sour as a lemon, she's lazy, and her work is poor."
Fran listens to her words and then says, “I know what you’re thinking, Jesus. Joyce is a challenge for me, and I know—nobody is in my life by accident.” That’s a lesson Fran has to keep re-learning because like most of us, relationships can be her greatest challenge.
Fran continues her conversation with Jesus. “The truth is, she drives me crazy! After all, she is the administrative assistant for the department. It's her job to help us with these projects. But she acts like she's doing you a favor when she does her job. I just can't stand people with lazy attitudes.” Fran expresses her feelings to Jesus.
Fran stops in her tracks and reminds herself again that no one is in her life by accident. “This is such a hard lesson for me to learn, Jesus. My human thinking tells me that a person who causes me trouble and makes my life more difficult surely can’t be a good thing. Yet I know that the relationships of my life teach me so much about trusting you and being more like you.”
"You may not think Joyce is doing you any good,” Jesus says to her, “but often I work in you through other people. And besides, Joyce needs you in her life."
Fran really doesn't want to hear that at this moment when she is so frustrated with Joyce. She knows that Jesus means she should be compassionate and caring toward Joyce, but she still can’t help thinking that all Joyce has to do is what she's paid to do. She thinks out loud, “I'm not supposed to baby her when she's so lazy, am I?"
"No, not baby her, but love her," Jesus reminds her. "You know, I love her just as much as I love you."
Fran wrinkles her nose. "Frankly, Jesus," she responds, "I thought you had better taste.” She says it with a chuckle, but she knows it reveals her inward feelings. "Besides, how can I love someone I don't even like?" she asks.
Fran heaves a sigh and heads to Joyce's desk. "Joyce, here's the last changes to the Walton proposal. I changed the PowerPoint and it really needs to be perfect. Unfortunately, that means changing all the handouts as well, and redoing that Excel budget sheet. So, please make those changes and send it to me. I'll need it before you leave today if you don't mind," Fran says, trying to sound pleasant.
"If I don't mind?" Joyce replies. "Well, I do mind. It's 4:00 and I leave here at 4:30. Why'd you wait so late to give it to me?" Joyce snatches it from Fran's hand as she slowly puts down the magazine she was reading.
"Joyce, I just got the changes from Ben. You know it has to be done today. Sorry, but that's the way it is," Fran says with irritation in her voice.
At that very moment a verse from Proverbs comes to Fran’s mind. “Sweetness of speech increases persuasiveness."
"But, Jesus," she thinks, "all I'm asking is for her to do her job. If she'd get busy, she could have it done in less than an hour. I just don't feel like babying her; she doesn't deserve it."
The words seem to echo in her head “I don’t feel like it. . . I don’t feel like it. . .” And Jesus reminds her again that if she runs on her feelings, she’ll never be able to love people she doesn’t like. Love is an action, and she has to do the right thing, whether she feels it or not.
Fran turns to Joyce again, and with great effort says, "Look, Joyce, I know it's late; I wish I could have gotten it to you sooner. But I really would appreciate your help. I don't think you'll have to work much past 4:30. I'll be in my office if you have any questions."