Called and Caffeinated: Recent Episodes

Stacey Sumereau

How do we interpret and understand what God is calling us to, both in our vocation and in other life choices? Join Stacey Sumereau on coffee dates with Catholic friends for insight and inspiring guidance. From touring with Broadway hit shows to discerning religious life on Lifetime's reality TV show "The Sisterhood: Becoming Nuns," Stacey hasn't stopped searching for God's will! Original music by JF Church.

The human heart plans the way, but the Lord directs the steps. -Proverbs 16:9

I WROTE A BOOK! Introducing Adventure Awaits: How to Interpret Your Desires and Hear God’s Voice publishing soon and available for preorder NOW with Ave Maria Press. Learn how to find the deepest desires of your heart, how they intersect with God’s desire for you, and how to hear his voice.

Have you ever struggled with the timing of a dream and wondered why God isn’t giving you the good desires in your heart? I’m no stranger to that. In 2020 I longed to write a book, but the circumstances weren’t working out. This is the story of how surrendering my dream to God made it work out SO MUCH BETTER than I could have planned.

Thank you so much to everyone who has preordered it already and for all the encouragement- I SO appreciate your kind comments!

Resources

Preorder Adventure Awaits here!
Watch episode on YouTube here
Watch The Sisterhood: Becoming Nuns Reality Docuseries 10-year Cast Reunion

Find tons of other discernment resources and contact Stacey for press interviews here.

If you're like me, you've read headlines the last 5 years and thought, "How in the WORLD did we get here?" Rising depression and anxiety, gender confusion en masse, and Marxist ideology on college campuses characterize American culture today. This episode will take you on a tour of the philosophers who laid the groundwork, and how we can pull out of the mess we're in.

Bobby Angel, author of The Postmodern Predicament, returns to Called and Caffeinated. We discuss:

Rarely-taught ideals of the Medieval Period that can resurrect and restore a God-centered culture
Do "cottagecore aesthetic" and women wearing prairie dresses indicate that Gen Z is hungry for a return to tradition?
Deconstructionism: What is it and how do we fight it?

Resources

PREORDER MY BOOK! Adventure Awaits: How to Interpret Your Desires and Hear God's Voice
Read about my latest pregnancy adventure and near-miraculous healing
Order The Postmodern Predicament: And a Roadmap for Restoration and Recovery by Bobby Angel

Your support means so much to me- please LIKE, SUBSCRIBE and SHARE! Find tons of FREE resources on my website.

Follow me on Instagram: @staceysumereau

Watch this video on YouTube

Shop my handmade beeswax candle collection with the Catholic All Year Marketplace

Need a community? Come join my Patreon community for monthly video chats with Catholics from around the USA, and other perks! Your support starting at just $5/mo will help support the continued provision of my unique discernment content.

“God didn’t come to be our personal assistant; he came to save us and bring us into communion with him, so that we might have access to his divine life and power and live from the truth that we are children of a good and capable Father.”

Are you ready for the best Advent ever?? As a lifelong Catholic, I feel like I've done ALL the Catholic things. Yet I still fear surrendering to God, I still care what other people think too much, I still struggle to get off my phone, and a million other things. Why?

Because there are parts of me that haven't met Jesus yet.

I know you'll love Heather Khym's insights from her new book Encountering Emmanuel that will make this your best Advent ever!

Achievable hospitality: How doing life together engenders authenticity and vulnerability
A peek into Heather’s experience of God speaking and her personal prayer routine
The ONLY thing you need to focus on in busy seasons (especially Advent!)
Does Jesus truly want to satisfy our desires, or want us to sacrifice them?
Making God the Lord of your life, not your personal assistant
What is God up to when it feels like he’s giving you the “silent treatment”?
Identifying the parts of yourself that haven’t met Jesus yet

Resources

Buy Encountering Emmanuel by Heather Khym
God’s “tone of voice”
How God’s voice “Sounds”

Thank you to today's sponsor, CWCNFP (Catholic Women and Couples Natural Family Planning.) They offer FREE virtual NFP courses in the Billings ovulation method. English and Spanish courses offered! Find CWCNFP on Instagram @cwcnfp and on Facebook at www.facebook.com/cwcnfp

Need a community? Come join my Patreon community for monthly video chats with Catholics from around the USA, and other perks! Your support starting at just $5/mo will help support the continued provision of my unique discernment content.

Check out my full line of handmade beeswax candles in partnership with the Catholic All Year Marketplace! Thank you to everyone who supports my ministry with the purchase of a candle. I'm so grateful!

“God did not create you so that you could work to acquire more possessions and then be a slave to them.”

Your space tells a story about you. Do you like the story it's telling? If not, how do you start (and persevere) in clearing clutter to reclaim your space?

If you’re tired of giving too much space and time to clutter (or it drains your energy but you don't know what to do about it,) then this episode will make a huge difference in your life. Best of all, this episode will equip you to spend MORE time and energy on your God-given purpose. Settle in with a cup of coffee and get motivated!

Topics Discussed

3 rules of an orderly home
Hidden costs of clutter: Space, time, energy and money
Stewardship rather than ownership: What it means and how it’s practically lived out
How to get started decluttering to avoid overwhelm, exhaustion and burnout
How to streamline and rework decluttering processes
Decluttering and setting boundaries around your technology use

Resources

Find Jennifer here
Shop Jennifer's book Make Room

Thank you to today's sponsor, CWCNFP (Catholic Women and Couples Natural Family Planning.) They offer FREE virtual NFP courses in the Billings ovulation method. English and Spanish courses offered! Find CWCNFP on Instagram @cwcnfp and on Facebook at www.facebook.com/cwcnfp

Need a community? Come join my Patreon community for monthly video chats with Catholics from around the USA, and other perks! Your support starting at just $5/mo will help support the continued provision of my unique discernment content.

Make Room: Take Control of Your Space, Time, Energy, and Money to Live on Purpose

HANG OUT WITH ME ON YOUTUBE!

“God’s voice is a voice that has a horizon, whereas the voice of the evil leads you to a wall- it backs you into a corner.”

If God spoke to you, how would his “tone of voice” sound? In a little concise teaching from Pope Francis, here four different hallmarks unique to God’s tone of voice. I love how this teaching both meshed perfectly with the writings of St. Teresa of Avila and St. Faustina, and also expanded and universalized them!

If you've ever mistaken God's voice for the worst voice in your head (or wonder whether you're discerning it correctly,) you'll love this episode!

Resources

Come drop me a line and let me know what resonated with you in this episode!

Are you daunted by the costs and options involved in learning Natural Family Planning? Connect with Catholic Women and Couples Natural Family Planning for FREE NFP training and personalized instruction in either English or Spanish! Also find them on Instagram @cwcnfp and Facebook here

Check out my full line of handmade beeswax candles in partnership with the Catholic All Year Marketplace, including my new scented Advent taper candles and fir tree scented Christmas tapers! You can also see the new Assisi candle in honor of Sts. Francis and Clare.

Read the full text of Pope Francis's teaching on the characteristics of God's voice on the Vatican website.

Spinning your wheels and overwhelmed? Erin Ingold is here to help! She reminded me every action starts in our thoughts. Managing our minds means we can heal the root of problems, decide well and confidently, and develop lasting habits of virtue.

In this episode we cover:

The importance of curiosity in change and healing
How to stop making harmful snap judgements
How to move forward when you're overwhelmed
The core GOOD desires that motivate every action- even sins!
How to move from self-judgement to self empathy and ultimately freedom

I love Metanoia's ideology and method so much that I'm joining their next training and becoming a certified Catholic life coach as of Spring 2025! I know you'll be helped by Erin's wisdom, as I have.

Resources

Catholic Coaching Program- Deadline to sign up is September 21st! Get all the info and sign up here
FREE Webinar "Our Favorite Coaching Strategy Revealed"

Thank you so much to everyone who has supported my ministry with the purchase of one of my beeswax candles! See my new Assisi candle and my whole collection with the Catholic All Year Marketplace here.

Need a community? Come join my Patreon community for monthly video chats with Catholics from around the USA, and other perks! Your support starting at just $5/mo will help support the continued provision of my unique discernment content.

WATCH ON YOUTUBE HERE

Father Timothy Gallagher OMV is one of the top experts on Ignatian Discernment. He was a part of the God's Adventure Awaits Summit back in the Summer of 2020 and I am so excited to have him back on now! Father Timothy shares his priestly discernment story with me and together we talk about the role of desire in discernment. He also goes over the process of discernment, gaining counsel, judging, and executing a decision with peace and in relationship with Christ. We talk about what should be discerned, little every day decisions vs. big decisions. Also discussed is what true peace is and how to know the difference. Join us as we talk about how what God wants for you is to uncover the deepest layers of what you want, so that He can show you what his will is through those desires.

Topics Discussed

What is worth discerning?
Vocational Discernment and the importance of Come & Sees
The Ignatian Spiritual Exercises 30 day silent retreat using meditations on the life of Christ to draw you deeper in to make decisions with Christ.
The importance of desire and attraction in discernment
Does God really want what we want? Why we need to trust in God's will for us, even if we are experiencing fear in Discernment.
The Colloquy, a conversation with Christ as a friend to a friend.
What prayer is, how to dispose ourselves properly to it, and who is the primary actor in it.
Spiritual Consolation and Desolation and how to respond to both.
How to use the virtue of prudence in your life for natural/non spiritual matters.
How to discern peace correctly. It's more than a good feeling.

Resources

St. Ignatius of Loyola
Venerable Bruno Lanteri
Book on Ignatian Discernment
Book on Prayer
Book on Rule #2
Podcasts-Discerning Hearts
Father Gregory Pine episode on Prudence
Seekdirection.app
Spiritualdirection.com
Lanteri Center for Ignatian Spirituality
What am I to do? Series on daily decisions.
Website: www.frtimothygallagher.org
Facebook: Fr. Timothy Gallagher
For a film on Venerable Bruno: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZTmqtQv7SbM

Sponsors:

CWCNFP-Catholic Women and Couples Natural Family Planning

Free virtual NFP courses using the Billings method. English and Spanish courses offered.

Website: www.cwcnfp.org

Instagram: @cwcnfp

Facebook: www.facebook.com/cwcnfp

Metanoia Catholic-Matt & Erin Ingold

The Catholic Coaching Podcast

Catholic Coaching Program- Deadline to sign up is September 20th, only 10 spots left!

Free "What type of coach are you?" Discernment Quiz: https://metanoiacatholic.typeform.com/coach-type

Metanoia Catholic Coaching Brochure: https://www.metanoiacatholic.com/catholic-coaching-certification

Thank you so much to everyone who has supported my ministry with the purchase of one of my beeswax candles! See my full collection with the Catholic All Year Marketplace here.

Need a community? Come join my Patreon community for monthly video chats with Catholics from around the USA, and other perks! Your support starting at just $5/mo will help support the continued provision of my unique discernment content.

JOIN THE FREE SURRENDER NOVENA CHALLENGE HERE! We start May 30 until June 7!

Show Notes

Do you feel like it’s hard to be totally real with God? Do you have trouble calming your mind and letting go of your to do list to pray? Do you feel frustrated with yourself and wish you could just be better?

Enter the Colloquy, a fancy word for “conversation” in St. Ignatius of Loyola’s formula. It’s a simple formula- literally 3 quick steps- anyone can use to have an authentic connection to the Lord. In the first few minutes I explain how to make a colloquy, then I move onto my own experience of making a colloquy.

Jesus’s love is unreal. In reading The Interior Castle I’ve had the good (hard) realization of how far I have to go before I’m ready for sainthood. Honesty is good, but I’ve felt so frustrated with myself lately. Jesus totally changed my heart and my outlook with his response. I hope my testimony gives you hope and encourages you to try making a colloquy

Topics Discussed

Ignatius of Loyola’s Spiritual Exercises
Sharing 3 of My Visions… What It’s Like to Experience Visions
How Does God’s Voice Actually “Sound”? St. Teresa’s Rules for Discerning Whether Voices Come From God, Our Imagination, or the Devil

Thank you so much to everyone who has supported my ministry with the purchase of one of my beeswax candles! See my full collection with the Catholic All Year Marketplace here- my newest candle is called Ex Cathedra, based on St. Peter’s Bascillica. With scents of lily, jasmine & seasalt, it’s perfect as we head into summer!

Come on over to my website for more resources for your spiritual life.

Need a community? Come join my Patreon community for monthly video chats with Catholics from around the USA, and other perks! Your support starting at just $5/mo will help support the continued provision of my unique discernment content.

Join the FREE Surrender Novena + Stretch Challenge here- we start May 30! Kick off your day with something good for your body and for your soul!

ADULT THEMES DISCUSSED!

Morgan Swartz is my podcast guest today, folks! She was a participant on my True North Discernment group that I led back in the Fall of 2020 with people who wanted some extra discernment guidance after The God’s Adventure Awaits Summit. Morgan is a bold and joyful woman for the Lord! She and I talk about being free in order to choose well and to really be able to seek the voice of God. We also discuss dating, listening to God/the Holy Spirit’s inspirations in prayer, and what it means to trust God even in our struggle with brokenness and addictions. Morgan has a ministry called JoyinHope and a book called Out of Darkness, Into Light about her struggle with pornography and masturbation.

Grab your new favorite brew and brace yourself for some deep, honest discussion about what it’s like to go through addiction and healing, and hearing God’s voice call you to do great things!

WATCH ON YOUTUBE HERE

Topics Discussed

Online dating
Developing a relationship with each person of the Blessed Trinity: How the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit heal us by showing us who we are
Morgan’s story of becoming addicted to porn and masturbation + her healing process from sin, shame and lies of the enemy
Physical boundaries in dating
The vital importance of an accountability partner and daily rosary
Gaining bravery to share your story-even and ESPECIALLY the hard parts

Resources

Book: Out of Darkness, Into Light by Morgan Swartz
Movie: The Shack
Prayer: “God, show me who I am to You”
Mini Lesson: Pope Francis’ Discerning the Voice of God
Morgan’s Ministry: JoyinHope
Morgan’s Youtube: JoyinHope
Morgan’s YouTube Healing Playlist
Our Lady of Fatima
Ascension Presents: Mari Pablo

Thank you so much to everyone who has supported my ministry with the purchase of one of my beeswax candles! See my full collection with the Catholic All Year Marketplace here- my newest candle is called Ex Cathedra, based on St. Peter’s Basilica. With scents of lily, jasmine & sea salt, it’s perfect as we head into summer!

Need a community? Come join my Patreon community for monthly video chats with Catholics from around the USA, and other perks! Your support starting at just $5/mo will help support the continued provision of my unique discernment content.

Hi Friends! God wants to speak to you, each of you. Because each of you are special to Him. Today I'm going to share a few of my experiences in prayer so that you know what is possible! I really hope that you enjoy my bold vulnerability in this episode in sharing a glimpse into some moments with the Lord where He was very clear with me (Because I need Him to be!) I hope this helps you to listen with expectation that Jesus will speak to you!

Get all settled in with your favorite new mug and get ready to learn more about how God can speak to you!

BUY THE PAINTING BY MY HUSBAND REFERENCED IN THIS EPISODE HERE

WATCH ON YOUTUBE HERE

Topics Discussed

Rediscovering boldness in faith by our expectations of how God will speak to us in prayer.
Saint friends: How they pray and what we can learn from them.
How the Mercy of God meets us in prayer and helps us heal.
Prayer visions and what they can look like.
Growth through suffering: Why it's a gain!

Resources

St. Faustina
St. Paul-Acts Ch. 9
Hebrews 13:5
St. Teresa of Avila
Father Ripperger
Last episode on God’s Voice
John's Painting in the YouTube Video-at 4:20
Nora
7 Sorrows of Mary
Ephesians 6:12
Sacred Heart
Our Lady Undoer of Knots

Thank you so much to everyone who has supported my ministry with the purchase of one of my beeswax candles! See my full collection with the Catholic All Year Marketplace here- my newest candle is called Ex Cathedra, based on St. Peter’s Bascillica. With scents of lily, jasmine & seasalt, it’s perfect as we head into summer!

Need a community? Come join my Patreon community for monthly video chats with Catholics from around the USA, and other perks! Your support starting at just $5/mo will help support the continued provision of my unique discernment content.

Topics Discussed

How to hear God when He speaks to us and what He "sounds" like (it may surprise you!)
What are locutions?
Where/who locutions come from: imagination, God or the devil
5 reasons from St. Teresa of Avila to know that a locution is an authentic communication from God

Resources

Interior Castle by St. Teresa of Avila
Father Chad Ripperger
Mike Creavey Episode
Depression Episode

Thank you so much to everyone who has supported my ministry with the purchase of one of my beeswax candles! See my full collection with the Catholic All Year Marketplace here- may I recommend an Alleluia candle for Easter? Lemon and lily of the valley mingle to make your home smell like pure joy!

Need a community? Come join my Patreon community for monthly video chats with Catholics from around the USA, and other perks! Your support starting at just $5/mo will help support the continued provision of my unique discernment content.

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Psalm 34: “Trust in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart”

January Donovan is a force of nature and walking proof of what we can accomplish when we undertake God’s invitation to a massive dream. She’s the founder of the highly successful Woman School and Wholeness School, wife, and mom of eight kids. She was so impactful that in the week since we recorded, I’m seeing enormous fruits in my life: I finally got motivated to hire an assistant so I can put out more content regularly, I’m cranking out a huge and exciting project (that’ll be announced in the coming months) with zero self-doubt, AND I’m running my household with more discipline. All that from just one conversation, and I can’t wait to hear the effects of our conversation in your life! Whether you consider yourself a dreamer or a practical person, you’ll gain irreplaceable wisdom from January.

Topics Discussed:

January’s daily routine as a mom of 8 and CEO
How God calls us through OUR action
The #1 qualities single women should look for in a man
How to form the desires of your heart and find your dream for this season
Growth mindset vs. fixed mindset

Resources

The Woman School website
Carol Dweck: Fixed vs. growth mindset

Thank you so much to everyone who has supported my ministry with the purchase of one of my beeswax candles! See my full collection with the Catholic All Year Marketplace here- may I recommend an Alleluia candle for Easter? Lemon and lily of the valley mingle to make your home smell like pure joy!

Need a community? Come join my Patreon community for monthly video chats with Catholics from around the USA, and other perks! Your support starting at just $5/mo will help support the continued provision of my unique discernment content.

"Why doesn't God help me in my suffering? Why does he feel farther away right at the time when I need to feel him closest? Why is he rejecting me?"

These are the questions I found myself asking in 2023 when beset by my son's extended health crisis: I barely slept more than an hour at a time for FIVE MONTHS. I quickly discovered why sleep deprivation has been used as a form of torture! In this difficult season I wrestled with big questions about what God's provision through hardship means. I hope this episode can support and encourage anyone who needs it today.

Most of the content I produce is totally free of charge. If you'd like to help support my ministry and family, please consider one of the following:

Purchase a candle from my collection with the Catholic All Year Marketplace- they make great Valentine's Day gifts as enhancing your Lent and Easter prayer!
Join my Patreon Community for monthly video chats with me and a great community of Catholics from around the USA!
Visit my YouTube channel (where I have free full-length workout videos) and subscribe and hit the bell so you don't miss an episode!
Share this episode with a friend and leave me a review on Apple Podcasts :)

Thanks for tuning in! Today I have 6 strategies you can implement right now to help you quit the win/lose mentality with other women.

Please consider supporting my work either by joining my Patreon community (starting at just $5/month with great perks!) ...

...and purchasing handmade beeswax candles from my collection with the Catholic All Year Marketplace. They make fantastic gifts for Lent, Easter, and Valentine's Day!

How do you handle the emotional rollercoaster when God appears to open and then almost immediately shut a door? Mary Clare had this question and I was so glad she asked! In this episode I'll be sharing how I handle the ups and downs, as well as the perfect parenting principle God uses on us, for our good. (Because TBH I need to be parented :) )

Find all episodes of my show as well as full-length Scripture-inspired workout videos on my website.

I hope you enjoy the episode! You can watch it ON YOUTUBE HERE. (and if you susbcribe, like and share while you're at it you'll make my day!)

Thanks for considering purchasing one of my handmade beeswax candles. They smell amazing and the jars are gorgeous! Check out my line of products available on the Catholic All Year Marketplace here!

Do you need a community of like-minded Christians? Join my Patreon community- pledges start at just $5/month! You'll also be supporting ongoing provision of my unique discernment content. Thanks so much for considering!

I've not yet talked about homeschooling on my show yet, but today's the day! I'm not a veteran homeschool mom by any means, but I've done enough to make a plan to tackle my 3 biggest pain points in homeschooling. They are:

Keeping patience when things get frustrating
What to do with your littles while you're doing schoolwork with your bigs
Keeping a tidy (enough) house to stay sane when everyone is home all day

I hope you enjoy the episode! You can watch it ON YOUTUBE HERE. (and if you susbcribe, like and share while you're at it you'll make my day!)

Thanks for considering purchasing one of my handmade beeswax candles. They smell amazing and the jars are gorgeous! Check out my line of products available on the Catholic All Year Marketplace here!

Do you need a community of like-minded Christians? Join my Patreon community- pledges start at just $5/month! You'll also be supporting ongoing provision of my unique discernment content. Thanks so much for considering!

Thank you for tuning in! Please subscribe and share with anyone you know who needs to hear this episode.

In this episode, Shannon and I detail our eating disorders and how scripture and understanding how God sees us freed us from our underlying self-image issues. Packed with practical tips and support for anyone struggling to love themselves.

Resources

Buy Shannon's Book See Yourself As God Does
Hear Dr. Andrew Whitmore's episode on Called and Caffeinated
Join Stacey's Patreon Community here!
Buy Stacey's handmade beeswax prayer candles. They make amazing gifts.

Thank you so much for tuning in! Do you feel like you're stuck in a rut? Can't get out of the same old bad habits (and you're sick of thinking about how you can't just kick them once and for all?) My good friend Dr. Andrew Whitmore will spell out strategies from his new book that are sure to give you tons of motivation and immediate progress. If you listen to my show regularly you know I love actionable strategies, and Dr. Whitmore will not disappoint.

Resources

Buy Dr. Whitmore's Book, Saintly Habits, here!
Stacey's Called and Caffeinated interview with Fr. Gregory Pine, O.P. on the virtue of prudence

Check out Stacey's handmade prayer candles and tallow lotion bars for sale on the Catholic All Year Marketplace here! They make wonderful gifts as well as companions for your prayer time to elevate your heart and soul.

Want to chat with Stacey and fellow wonderful Catholics from around the country? Join Stacey's Patreon community. Your pledge supports this channel and gains you access to twice-monthly chats to support you in your walk with God. Click here to learn more!

Happy Feast Day of St. Joseph!! I have a newfound devotion to this incredible Saint and, since I have promised to spread awareness of his amazingness, I'm keeping that promise today. It's been an extremely eventful year for the Sumereau family, and one other Saint has also been instrumental for us. Yes God does answer prayers, and he loves to do it in a way that will blow your mind!

Also in this episode is a concept that's been buzzing around in my brain for YEARS that I've never yet been able to articulate. When we're discerning something we often want to rush to an answer. However, the Lord may want to HEAL us first. How to begin understanding that, getting to the root of the problem, and re-framing our understanding of discernment so we can approach it correctly? Listen to find out.

(My 2-month-old son was a very noisy sleeper in this episode, so my apologies for some background "extras"! If I wait for perfection, nothing will happen these days!)

Resources

Amber VanVickle's article A Mother Finds Love at the Foot of the Cross
St. Joseph's Cloak Novena
St. Therese of Lisieux Novena

In my years in discernment ministry, I’ve noticed that most people look for God’s voice in two specific ways: A voice in one’s head, or a sign. As my spiritual life has matured, I’ve mostly stopped asking God for a sign in discernment. Why? I have four reasons:

Signs can be ambivelent: How do you know what the sign means?
God may not want to tell you because he may want you to choose
Signs are limiting: God often wants to work far more creatively!
Asking for a sign can make you hyper-focused on the sign when discernment is rather a relationship

So how should we pray in discernment? There are many ways, and I’ll finish the episode with four very practical ways to help you get unstuck and pray well. Two are from St. Ignatius “The Man” of Loyola. Enjoy!

Resources

Get the Prayer of Surrender mentioned in this episode when you subscribe to https://www.staceysumereau.com . You’ll instantly get a packet called “How to Make the Right Choice” and inside that is the Prayer.
Leah Darrow’s episode on Called and Caffeinated
Fr. Gregory Pine O.P.’s episode on Called and Caffeinated

Thank you to everyone who has purchased on of my handmade prayer candles! Check out the whole line here!

To join my Patreon Community for lively discussions and prayer twice a month! Pledges start at just $5/month and support the ongoing provision of this unique discernment content. Thank you for your support!

Are you in a phase of life where you lost your motivation to pray? For me, pregnancy is a season where I totally fall off the wagon in my prayer life. Then when I lose the habit of prayer I lose the motivation. And it's really hard to get back into the habit.

Today I'm sharing 5 fail-safe strategies to revive my mostly-defunct prayer life:

Make your busy life a prayer
Make a plan
Tithe your time
Prioritize your best way to connect with God
Recall God's past providence

I've begun making 100% beeswax candles with crackling wooden wicks to enhance your prayer time and for many occasions! I'm thrilled to be selling my candles on the Catholic All Year Marketplace- get yours here. (If the candle you want is sold out, never fear! It'll be back in stock within the week!)

Join the Called and Caffeinated Patreon community starting at just $5/month to support this show and join our bi-monthly video chats with community members around the country and internationally. Your support is SO appreciated!

“Self-knowledge is so important that, even if you were raised right up to the heavens, I should like you never to relax your cultivation of it.” -St. Teresa of Avila

In this episode I'm joined by famed author of many books, including The Temperament God Gave You, Laraine Bennett. If you're like me, you get a little annoyed when someone references the temperaments because it feels just a tad... simplistic. Or you never read a book about them before. Never fear! We break down each temperament into manageable explanations and after hearing them, I think you'll agree with me that they're an enormously helpful tool for increasing self-knowledge.

My favorite part of our interview was discussing something I've never heard talked about before: Pitfalls to avoid discernment for each temperament, as well as how to use your particular temperament to discern God's will well. As always on this show, we discuss discernment for every single decision in your life- not just your vocation.

Topics Discussed

What is temperament? How it differs from personality
Where the concept of temperaments comes from, and an overview of each
Thinking correctly about temperament: Avoiding both navel-gazing and unjust judgement
Discernment advice for each temperament type
Are certain temperament types more compatible with others in marriage?

Resources

Know Thyself! Board Game by Laraine Bennett
The Temperament God Gave You by Laraine Bennett
Laraine's Temperament Quiz
The Little Way of Living With Less- Laraine's newest book
Brennan and Audra Nakane: The Nakane CAPS temperament system on Called and Caffeinated

Need a community? Check out the Christian Family Movement. Find a group or start one in your area backed by their 70+ years of experience strengthening couples and families!

Your support on Patreon helps power these episodes. Thank you to our amazing patrons who make this unique content possible! Consider joining and gain access to Coffee Sips, Stacey's secondary podcast, as well as twice-monthly video chats with the community. Pledges start at just $5/mo.

My heart went out to a listener named Victoria, who wrote to me of her eating disorder. Her discomfort with her looks pushed her toward perfectionism and an extreme fear of failure. As I read her words, I knew exactly how she felt, because for years I was there as well.

You can't discern your true purpose when you're living in fear of failure and self-dislike. Even after your body heals and you begin eating normally again, long-term healing of your heart and your outlook is absolutely essential. If you're stuck in that in-between, this one's for you. In this episode, I'm sharing my experience and then reducing my entire healing journey down to just ONE simple question. Answering that one question broke me out of years of spiraling self-hatred and anxiety. How you answer this question will hopefully do exactly the same for you.

Resources

Watch on YouTube HERE!
Stacey's episode with Dr. Scott Hahn includes the topic of fasting for people recovering from body image issues.

Need a community? Check out the Christian Family Movement. Find a group or start one in your area backed by their 70+ years of experience strengthening couples and families!

If you're looking for more discernment advice, consider joining the True North Course. This self-paced, 5-module Course is a comprehensive guide to help you discern any decision to live with purpose, passion and peace. Stacey Sumereau has guided people from 13 countries through True North- discover your purpose today!

Your support on Patreon helps power these episodes. Thank you to our amazing patrons who make this unique content possible! Consider joining and gain access to Coffee Sips, Stacey's secondary podcast, as well as twice-monthly video chats with the community. Pledges start at just $5/mo.

My heart went out to a listener named Victoria, who wrote to me of her eating disorder. Her discomfort with her looks pushed her toward perfectionism and an extreme fear of failure. As I read her words, I knew exactly how she felt, because for years I was there as well.

You can't discern your true purpose when you're living in fear of failure and self-dislike. Even after your body heals and you begin eating normally again, long-term healing of your heart and your outlook is absolutely essential. If you're stuck in that in-between, this one's for you. In this episode, I'm sharing my experience and then reducing my entire healing journey down to just ONE simple question. Answering that one question broke me out of years of spiraling self-hatred and anxiety. How you answer this question will hopefully do exactly the same for you.

Resources

Watch on YouTube HERE!
Stacey's episode with Dr. Scott Hahn includes the topic of fasting for people recovering from body image issues.

Need a community? Check out the Christian Family Movement. Find a group or start one in your area backed by their 70+ years of experience strengthening couples and families!

If you're looking for more discernment advice, consider joining the True North Course. This self-paced, 5-module Course is a comprehensive guide to help you discern any decision to live with purpose, passion and peace. Stacey Sumereau has guided people from 13 countries through True North- discover your purpose today!

Your support on Patreon helps power these episodes. Thank you to our amazing patrons who make this unique content possible! Consider joining and gain access to Coffee Sips, Stacey's secondary podcast, as well as twice-monthly video chats with the community. Pledges start at just $5/mo.

“So, what then is life about? To what — to whom — will we entrust our heart? There are plenty of suitors, but only one worthy spouse. For, as we’ll find, a human life is a weighty thing, and some goals simply can’t bear the burden of our whole heart’s love.”

If there's one thing I crave in all my decision-making, it's confidence. If I knew for sure what the right thing was, I would be so happy and choose it immediately! Sadly, there's usually no burning bush or angel appearing in a dream to tell me.

Developing the virtue of prudence is the best guide. The brilliant Fr. Gregory Pine is on the pod to discuss the 8 parts of prudence, formulating a vision for who I want to be on the other side of each decision, why we call prudence the "charioteer of the virtues," and so much more.

Thank you to this episode's sponsor, the Christian Family Movement. To join or start a community in your area, click here!

Looking for in-depth discernment advice? Join the True North Discernment Course, available for a limited time!

Looking for community and want to support this channel? Join Stacey's Patreon community for twice monthly video chats with amazing people from around the Country! Your monthly pledge helps support this show.

There are a million parenting advice books, homeschooling books, how-to's on organizing, and spiritual books. Much, much more rare is a book helping us parents know when to work and when to put your feet up, how to make your marriage last with boisterous youngsters claiming your every ounce of energy, how to form a philosophy for educating your children, and how to keep one million tasks in balance... or discern when to cut down the list!

Leila Lawler, founder of the popular blog Like Mother Like Daughter and now author of the aptly (and cheekily) named Summa Domestica, has been on my 'hit list' for quite some time. She channels the collective memory every family needs to navigate those decisions, both large and small, no one else talks about. I recommend this episode for any parents but also those who feel called to marriage and want to benefit from early preparation for family life.

Resources

Buy the Summa Domestica here
Leila's blog Like Mother Like Daughter

Join the True North Discernment Course, open for a limited time! Click this link for the self-paced Course aimed at helping you make all your life choices with purpose, passion and peace.

Thank you to this episode's sponsor, the Christian Family Movement. To find or start a group in your area click this link. Keep your family Catholic and strong by forming intentional community right where you are!

Thank you to our other sponsor, Catholic Match! CM has worked for me and for countless others and it's the largest Catholic dating platform anywhere. To start your FREE profile, click this link.

Anyone else totally lose steam at this point in Lent? It's not Holy Week yet and the "smells and bells" of special liturgies haven't arrived. And TBH I'm busy and the excitement of growth at the outset of Ash Wednesday wore off weeks ago. If you're like me, you will absolutely LOVE my interview with the inimitable Dr. Scott Hahn.

There's so much more to fasting than giving up: It will increase our JOY. It unites us in brotherhood to the millions of people in our Universal Church who have fasted throughout the centuries. Give this a listen to gear you up for Holy Week; it won't disappoint!

Topics Discussed

How to find joy in fasting
Discerning when you've taken your resolutions too far (or not far enough)
Fasting for those suffering from body image anxiety
Collectively building the Kingdom of God through fasting
Does fasting "prove" our faith to God?

Looking for more discernment guidance? Consider signing up for the True North Discernment Course. Great for any life decisions, big or small, this Course is rooted in rich Catholic discernment tradition. 5 self-paced modules including worksheets, video teaching sessions, and personalized coaching with Stacey!

Join the Called and Caffeinated Patreon Community for twice-monthly video chats and to support this unique content!

Thank you to this episode's sponsor, the Christian Family Movement. For over 70 years CFM has been building strong communities to help keep families strong! Check it out here.

VIEW ON YOUTUBE HERE

"God does not reject the places even we reject within ourselves."

I've never thought of Lent as a time for healing, but my conversation with Sr. Miriam James Heidland changed that. Prayer, fasting and almsgiving: the purpose of these is not to do them for their own sake, but in order to enter into the desert with the Lord. To let him heal the places that most hurt us.

If that scares the living daylights out of you... it should. It will. But only in exposing our wound to the healer can he truly heal us. If you've followed Sr. Miriam's heart-centered ministry as I have and have loved her Abiding Together Podcast, this one is absolutely for you. Be sure to listen right to the end as I share a healing image from my own testimony of post-NICU recovery.

Topics Discussed

Seeing our sins as wounds
How to achieve deep, intimate prayer
What to expect when we are truly vulnerable with God
Ongoing healing: When the road feels never-ending
Fasting so that you can feast on something else

Resources

Buy Sr. Miriam's Book Restore here- and study along with the Abiding Together Facebook group
The Abiding Together Podcast

Looking for community? Join the Called and Caffeinated Patreon Community where we join in prayer and conversation twice a month. Pledges start at just $5/mo and support the provision of this unique content!

Thank you to our episode sponsor Catholic Match! Join the largest Catholic online dating platform with a FREE profile by March 15, 2022 and you'll automatically entered to win a 6-month membership!

WATCH ON YOUTUBE HERE!

“If you do not know how to feast, you do not know how to feast.” -GK Chesterton

Not gonna lie… as a teen I usually weighed my Lenten resolution options against how good I’d look in a swimsuit by Easter. To be honest, I never “got” fasting. I still don’t know if I do, but this year I’ve received a few great new books that completely transformed my outlook on Lent and fasting and, dare I say, made me look forward to this penitential season!?

Today I’m going way beyond the McDonald’s fish sandwich and Mardi Gras in New Orleans. I’m interviewing one of the editors of Sophia Institute Press’s The Lenten Cookbook. Kristen Van Uden is a wealth of knowledge regarding how Lent and different fasting traditions came together over the centuries. You’ll also learn about the TRUE purpose of fasting and how to do it well, and the continuity of fasting traditions throughout the centuries.

Topics Discussed

Fasting as preparation and reparation
Importance of integrating our physical bodies and spiritual souls
Overview of the history of Lent
Early fasting traditions: The Black Fast, Xerophagia, Collations, Ember Days, Rogation Days
The Church’s current fasting requirements

Resources

Buy The Lenten Cookbook here!
Catholic Icing- Great resources for Catholic families

Thank you to this episode’s sponsor, Catholic Match! Start your Catholic love story with a FREE profile. Use this link by March 15, 2022 and you’ll automatically be entered to win a 6-month membership! Also follow on Instagram @CatholicMatch

Do you need discernment skills for life? Join the True North Course, now open for a limited time! A self-guided course based in the discernment tradition of the Church with videos, worksheets and personal coaching from Stacey Sumereau.

My dad had aggressive cancer in 2019 that almost killed him. Watching him go through chemo was an extremely intense experience for my whole family. When I heard about Sr. Diana Marie's mission of dedicating her life to caring for terminally ill cancer patients, my first reaction was "How do you DO that?"

Not only does she spend her days loving people in their last days, but she's also young, full of joy, and hilarious (sarcasm is her love language.) We cover a whole range of topics from her conversion from Mormonism to Catholicism in grad school, her discernment process, and her falling in love with the life of the Dominican Sisters of Hawthorne. If you need a relatable story of someone who didn't feel "holy enough" and struggled with all the big questions, this one's for you.

WATCH ON YOUTUBE HERE!

Topics Covered

Navigating religious life discernment as a convert
Why Sr. Diana Marie chose a nursing order even though she didn't see herself as a nurse
Handling anxiety about life choices
When to know you should seriously discern religious life
Telling your family you're entering religious life when you know they'll be disappointed
Charism and life of the Dominican Sisters of Hawthorne

Resources

Dominican Sisters of Hawthorne website
Schedule a Come and See here (Vocations chat coming up April 2 and retreat May 21 in Macon GA!)
NEW video about the Sisters here
Stacey's interview with Fr. Gregory Pine

Do you need discernment skills for life? Join the True North Course, now open for a limited time! A self-guided course based in the discernment tradition of the Church with videos, worksheets and personal coaching from Stacey Sumereau.

Thank you to this episode’s sponsor, Catholic Match! Start your Catholic love story with a FREE profile. Use this link by March 15, 2022 and you’ll automatically be entered to win a 6-month membership! Also follow on Instagram @CatholicMatch

Did you know C&C is a YouTube show too? Watch here!

We discuss the following saints and their virtues:

Faith exemplified by St. Bassa
Courage exemplified by St. Perpetua
Forgiveness and mercy exemplified by St. Gladys
Perseverance exemplified by St. Theneva
Detachment exemplified by St. Frances of Rome
Generosity exemplified by Bl. Marianna Biernacka

Resources

Kelly’s website (Purchase Saintly Moms directly from her for a signed copy!)
Stacey’s workout series Catholic Strong

Thank you to this episode’s sponsor, Catholic Match! Start your Catholic love story with a FREE profile. Use this link by March 15, 2022 and you’ll automatically be entered to win a 6-month membership! Also follow on Instagram @CatholicMatch

Do you need discernment skills for life? Join the True North Course, now open for a limited time! A self-guided course based in the discernment tradition of the Church with videos, worksheets and personal coaching from Stacey Sumereau

Watch on YouTube here!

Well, well, well. My husband John actually asked to come up with the ideas for this episode and I was like 'YES thank you honey.' I always feared as a single person that my husband and I would fall out of love and out of like, and 5 years in, I'm happy to report we're more into each other than when we got married!

We're sharing today our top tips for maintaining a healthy marriage:

The importance of surrendering everything in marriage to God
How to make your suffering fruitful
What to do when your spouse sins or irritates you
How to keep spiritually healthy
The importance of making love as often as possible
And more!

Mentioned in this episode: Get the life-changing Prayer of Surrender FREE when you subscribe at StaceySumereau.com. It's inside a packet called "How to Make the Right Choice."

Looking for community? Join our wonderful Patreon group for twice monthly chats! Patreon is a monthly pledge program that helps create sustainable income for creatives. When you make a low monthly pledge you gain a great group of friends AND support the provision of my unique discernment content!

Thank you to today's sponsor, Catholic Match! Get your Catholic love story started FREE by clicking this link!

The Holy Spirit is... a dove?? Anyone else feel like the third Person of the Blessed Trinity is just a little inaccessible the way he's usually described?

He's so much more than that. In fact, the Holy Spirit is no less than the ACTUAL antidote to literally everything wrong in the world. A relationship with the Holy Spirit is essential to good discernment, and if you don't know how to get started then this is the perfect episode for you.

For some time I've wanted to delve deeper into understanding this Person. Sr. Mary Ann Fatula is a true scholar and her book Drawing Close to the Holy Spirit compiles insights and images of this Divine Person from Saints through the ages. She's also the sweetest person I've ever met... you can practically hear the Holy Spirit speaking through her!

Topics Discussed * Images to help us understand the Holy Spirit :) * Holy Spirit as the "Impulse of Love," the "Kiss of Love," and ultimate "Friend." * How to begin praying to the Holy Spirit * Allowing the Holy Spirit to pray in us

Resources * Buy Drawing Close to the Holy Spirit * Watch this episode on YouTube here!

Be my guest! Join Stacey on the Wisdom App JAN 2 at 8:30pm EST for a live podcasting event. Download the app and find Stacey at @Stacey Sumereau Join the Called and Caffeinated Patreon Community! We have a twice monthly video chat. Our community is an amazing opportunity for you to build authentic friendships with people of faith around the Country!

WATCH ON YOUTUBE HERE

Faith helps us get through challenges, yes, but when we have extended trials that press on us we can sometimes falter and lose heart. If we can’t hear God speak or feel his comfort, It can leave us questioning “why has God abandoned me? Where was he when I needed him? Does he really love me if he’s letting me go through this?”

I experienced all those things in the trauma and trial an emergency C-section where my daughter almost died, followed by her 126 days in the NICU. It was the scariest, most painful, most uncomfortable time of my life. I’ve shared a lot on it and I’ll link a summary of her journey and homecoming. In this video, I want to share my deeply personal internal journey which I haven’t yet shared. I also want give it a framework or a loose process to give you or anyone who needs to heal their relationship with God, in hopes that maybe it’ll give you a way forward.

Resources

Honora’s Journey and Homecoming
Fr. Mark Goring’s Interview
Stacey on Ascension Presents

Today's episode is sponsored by the Hallow App. Hallow is the #1 Catholic Prayer App with over 500 prayer sessions. Learn to meditate, deepen your prayer life, pray with your community, and set your prayer goals. Get a FREE premium 90-day trial when you click this link!

Looking for community? Join Stacey's Patreon community for live Google Meet prayer and chats twice monthly . Patreon is a platform that allows creatives to make sustainable income, so your small monthly pledge makes a big difference in the continued creation of Stacey's unique discernment content!

So things are opening up again (Yay!) And suddenly you're back to juggling a busy schedule and your prayer life is slipping. You're not alone.

In this episode I'm answering a question from Julie who's feeling frustrated by her lack of ability to maintain the 4-times-daily structure to her prayer life she had in quarantine. I'll be discussing:

The #1 obstacle in your spiritual life (it's NOT faltering in your prayer life!)
How to get back into a prayer routine once you've fallen off the horse
Why quality over quantity is important
Identifying your best style of prayer
Overcoming perfectionism
Finding creative ways to pray when you don't have much time
7 practical strategies to ensure consistency in prayer

Resources

Overcoming Spiritual Discouragement by Fr. Timothy Gallagher
Get Stacey's prayer of surrender free when you subscribe (in "How to Make the Right Choice" packet) by clicking here

Enjoy and thank you so much for listening!

Today's episode is sponsored by the Hallow App. Hallow is the #1 Catholic Prayer App with over 500 prayer sessions. Learn to meditate, deepen your prayer life, pray with your community, and set your prayer goals. Get a FREE premium 90-day trial when you click this link!

Looking for community? Join Stacey's Patreon community for live Google Meet prayer and chats twice monthly . Patreon is a platform that allows creatives to make sustainable income, so your small monthly pledge makes a big difference in the continued creation of Stacey's unique discernment content!

Watch on YouTube here!

Show Notes

Day after day, as I tearfully left my baby and away from the NICU, I would cry out to God, “how much longer?” It’s hard to believe that Nora was only in the hospital 126 days. It felt like 126 years. Why do the deserts of our lives feel so long, and what do you do when your faith begins to waver? Are you supposed to just get through it, or can you learn something when you're deprived of legitimate needs?

Sonja Corbitt’s new book, Just Rest, came to me at the perfect time as I struggled to process my hell ride of 2021. It parallels the deserts of our lives with the Israelites’ 40 years of wandering in the desert before entering the Promised Land. Just as they, we must learn the lessons of our deserts in order to take possession of our promised rest.

If you’ve struggled to see the point in your suffering (I have,) this episode is for you. Sonja and I discuss the tremendous hope and healing waiting in the desert if only we can open our eyes and our hearts and let God stand in the void.

Topics Discussed

How the desert is a seemingly contradictory “fertile emptiness” and “fruitful wasteland”
Seeing the “dew” to refresh and sustain us
Two methods to identify how God is working on you
Disciplining your thoughts and habits
Seeing past the immediate deprivations and identifying the deeper issues that God wants to heal in your desert

Resources

Buy Just Rest and see all of Sonja's offerings, including her podcast, here
Subscribe FREE on Stacey's website and receive a packet called "How to Make the Right Choice" instantly in your inbox

Many thanks to this episode's sponsor, Catholic Match! Start your love story on the internet's largest Catholic dating website by clicking here. Also follow for dating inspiration on Instagram @CatholicMatch!

Join fellow Catholics across the nation in the Called and Caffeinated Patreon Community! Join our monthly video chats with Stacey and friends starting at just $5/month.

I got a note from Kim asking how to keep trusting God in her season of very extended singlehood. I sympathize 1000% with the struggle but I also FIRMLY believe no one has to stay in a place of sadness, loneliness, and scarcity.

Topics Discussed

My 3 hopes for anyone struggling with singlehood
3 strategies for achieving and living those hopes

Resources

Emily Stimpson Chapmans episode on the Called and Caffeinated Podcast on extended singlehood
Fr. Mike Schmitz's episode on the Called and Caffeinated Podcast on the 3 levels of our callings
2-Step plan for entrusting God with your future (and how to be okay with doing that)
Have a question? Click here and drop me a line to have it answered!

Thank you to today's episode sponsor Catholic Match! Start your Catholic love story with a FREE profile by clicking this link. Also follow on Instagram @catholicmatch

Thank you to our other sponsor Chews Life Rosaries. Click here and get 10% off their beautiful handmade Catholic gifts (including their signature teething rosaries for babies) with the code CAFFEINATED10.

You know when a woman walks by who looks absolutely fabulous and confident? Is that woman you, or do you wish you could feel more comfortable in your own skin? Until recently, I was the latter. Between years of self-image issues, changing shape constantly from three pregnancies in five years, and hanging on to hand-me-downs I don't like because I feel guilty giving away free stuff, I've rarely felt fabulous in my clothing.

Enter Nicole Caruso, former writer for Verily Magazine and author of Worthy of Wearing. Nicole's worthiness movement is taking the Catholic Instagram corner by storm, pioneering an outside-in approach to recognizing your self-worth. Dressing well isn't vain, and showing your personal style is an opportunity for evangelization.

I've been on my own personal style journey this year, and I could not be more excited to share how it's a major part of my healing experience! If you feel you have nothing to wear despite a closet full of clothes, or like you're overdue for a style upgrade, this one's for you.

Topics

What is the Worthy of Wearing movement?
Reclaiming style from the fashion industry
What is personal style, and how do you begin to develop yours?
Editing your closet
Shopping strategies to get a great closet that fits your budget
The modern, integrated Catholic woman, and how to be one
What to do if you often feel like “I can’t wear that”

Resources

Follow along with Stacey’s style journey on IG: @staceysumereau
Buy Worthy of Wearing
Nicole’s website with TONS of resources
Worthy of Wearing on Pinterest: @worthyofwearing
Nicole on Pinterest: @nmcaruso
Audrey Coyne’s YouTube channel

Thank you to today's episode sponsor Chews Life Rosaries! Get 10% off using code CAFFEINATED10 and spoil all the cute babies in your life with beautiful handmade gifts!

Thank you to our other sponsor Catholic Match! CM is the largest Catholic dating platform. Start your love story by clicking here and creating a free profile.

You know when a woman walks by who looks absolutely fabulous and confident? Is that woman you, or do you wish you could feel more comfortable in your own skin? Until recently, I was the latter. Between years of self-image issues, changing shape constantly from three pregnancies in five years, and hanging on to hand-me-downs I don't like because I feel guilty giving away free stuff, I've rarely felt fabulous in my clothing.

Enter Nicole Caruso, former writer for Verily Magazine and author of Worthy of Wearing. Nicole's worthiness movement is taking the Catholic Instagram corner by storm, pioneering an outside-in approach to recognizing your self-worth. Dressing well isn't vain, and showing your personal style is an opportunity for evangelization.

I've been on my own personal style journey this year, and I could not be more excited to share how it's a major part of my healing experience! If you feel you have nothing to wear despite a closet full of clothes, or like you're overdue for a style upgrade, this one's for you.

Topics

What is the Worthy of Wearing movement?
Reclaiming style from the fashion industry
What is personal style, and how do you begin to develop yours?
Editing your closet
Shopping strategies to get a great closet that fits your budget
The modern, integrated Catholic woman, and how to be one
What to do if you often feel like “I can’t wear that”

Resources

Follow along with Stacey’s style journey on IG: @staceysumereau
Buy Worthy of Wearing
Nicole’s website with TONS of resources
Worthy of Wearing on Pinterest: @worthyofwearing
Nicole on Pinterest: @nmcaruso
Audrey Coyne’s YouTube channel

Thank you to today's episode sponsor Chews Life Rosaries! Get 10% off using code CAFFEINATED10 and spoil all the cute babies in your life with beautiful handmade gifts!

Thank you to our other sponsor Catholic Match! CM is the largest Catholic dating platform. Start your love story by clicking here and creating a free profile.

The Nakanes couldn't believe it when they discovered a personality typing system that maps not only to reality, but also to scripture! It's not just a fun Facebook quiz; this system is a powerful key to understanding the Triune God, the personality you were given, other people, motivations, and free will. Brennen and Audra Nakane have been researching, developing, and writing about Nakane CAPS for over a decade. This is one of the longest C&C episodes, but it's the audio equivalent of a page-turner. Enjoy!

Topics Discussed

The 7 motivants and how body language expresses them
How the motivants map to scripture and to God
Using the motivants to deepen your prayer life
Increasing relationships and communication using Nakane CAPS

Resources

Find Brennen and Audra’s Nakane CAPS System
Many free trainings and resources on the Nakane's YouTube channel
Subscribe to Stacey's website here and receive your FREE discernment tool called "How to Make the Right Choice" when you click here!

Many thanks to today's episode sponsors!

Start your Catholic love story by setting up a free Catholic Match profile! Also follow them on Instagram for great dating advice @CatholicMatch.

Use code CAFFEINATED10 to get 10% off your order of beautiful baby teething rosaries, rosary bracelets, teething necklaces, downloadable coloring pages, and much more from Chews Life Rosaries!

Never be overwhelmed by discerning religious life again! In this Q&A episode, follow this simple method to narrow down your search from the entire universe to the communities you're going to visit in person.

Questions for journaling included in this episode:

Do I see myself in a cloistered or an active community? Why?
Is wearing a habit as part of religious life important to me? Why?
Do I want to travel and serve in many places, or would I prefer to stay in one location? (I included this one because certain orders may station you around the world in several different convents!)
What are my unique talents? (If you don’t know, think about what people often tell you you’re good at, or what people often ask you for help with.)
What forms of prayer am I most attracted to- charismatic praise and worship? Rote prayers like the rosary? Lectio Divina?
Who are the particular groups I feel called to serve? (The elderly, homeless, mothers in need, children?)
Where do my gifts particularly shine? (teaching, nursing, cooking, writing, hospitality, etc?)
What service experiences have I found most satisfying in the past, and why?
When I envision myself in religious life, what do I picture myself doing?
Are there any particular orders whose spirituality I’m attracted to- Dominican, Carmelite, Franciscan, etc.

Questions for Zoom conversations:

What do you love about your life?
What does the schedule of a normal day look like?
What do your community members do for fun and recreation?
What’s the story of your founder?
What do you most love about your charism?

Resources

The God's Adventure Awaits Summit: 40+ Talks on Vocation and Catalog of 56 Religious Communities and Mission Organizations (Get 50% off using code DISCERNMENT50)
Vision Vocation Network Matching Quiz

This episode is sponsored by Chews Life Rosaries. Get 10% off their Christmas in July sales happening NOW using code CAFFEINATED10 (please note, this code doesn't apply to 1-day sales, but will apply to everything else!)

“Listening with a capital L is the secret to life, the secret to love, because you can’t love what you don’t understand, and you can only understand if you listen.”

What if it were your actual job to contemplate? To perceive deeply? That’s how Dony MacManus sees his calling as an artist. He spent three weeks just drawing Michaelangelo’s Pieta, and he shares how that experience healed and changed him.

Living in our distracted world, I know it’s a struggle to concentrate enough to enter into authentic contemplation. Dony’s artistic perspective will help you counteract fast culture with slow gratitude, appreciation, and relationship.

Perception is the “grammar” of contemplation
How Dony vacillates between conceptual (“architectural”) and perceptual (“musical”) realities when he begins a work of art, and how it relates to Christian prayer life
What "Forward in tradition" means, and how that creates great culture
How to begin to contemplate using sacred art
Why contemplation is like dating
How to concentrate in a distracted world

Resources

Dony's website
Dony MacManus Studios
Worthy of Wearing by Nicole Caruso
Theology of Home by Dr. Carrie Gress
The Fundamental Secret of Happiness by Dominick Albano

Come on Pilgrimage to the Holy Land! Jan 17-25, 2022. Come walk the sites of Christ's life on Earth and eat the world's best hummus!

This episode is sponsored by Chews Life Rosaries. Click here to shop and use code CAFFEINATED10 for 10% off your order. Don't miss their Christmas in July sales happening now! (Please note, discount code does not apply to one-day sales in July.)

A little while back I got a message from Kathryn who’s struggling to surrender to God’s will for vocation, career, and living situation. She wrote, “Every time I surrender what I want to God I just get sad, like I’m giving up. How can I surrender my desires God when I don’t even think he cares, when I don’t think he wants to give me what I want?”

My heart went out to Kathryn and I knew right away I wanted to devote an entire episode to her question. During my vocational discernment journey, I did many ugly cries in adoration struggling with exactly this same issue. In this first-of-its-kind Q&A episode, I’m sharing how to build your trust in God for true peace and an unstoppable faith.

Leaning into this massive question is scary, hard, and uncomfortable. But I’m absolutely stoked for Kathryn and anyone in this particular struggle because it’s the threshold of an entirely new, authentic life.

In this episode:

2 journaling prompts to diagnose the cause of a lack of trust in God
Practical steps to take to see God’s faithfulness and providence in your life
How to give God your “down payment of trust,” even if you’re nervous about it
The moment that made me love surrender (I hated it at first!)

Resources

Visit StaceySumereau.com: Subscribe and instantly get “How to Make the Right Choice” packet (Surrender prayer on p. 3) While you’re there, click the Pilgrimage tab to check out Stacey’s 9-day Holy Land pilgrimage in 2022, and consider joining!
Get a FREE premium 3-month trial to Hallow, the #1 Catholic mediation and prayer app by following this link: hallow.com/staceysumereau
Surrender Novena by Fr. Dolindo Rubino
Trustful Surrender to Divine Providence: The Secret to Peace and Happiness by Bl. Claude de Colombiere and Fr. Jean-Baptiste Saint-Jure https://www.amazon.com/Trustful-Surrender-Divine-Providence-Happiness/dp/0895552167

Thank you to today’s sponsor, Chews Life Rosaries! Massive Christmas in July sales are happening now. Use code CAFFEINATED10 for 10% off your order (Please note: code does not apply to one-day sales.)

Trustful Surrender to Divine Providence: The Secret of Peace and Happiness

“The Holy Spirit is moving now- he doesn’t want to wait five years until you’ve got your life together.”

It was my honor to share a beverage with the incredibly down-to-earth and inspiring gal pal Ali Hoffman. From discussing grieving your dreams to awkward parties and how to host them, Ali and I are your cheerleaders in living out today well, whatever God's calling you to right now.

Show Notes

Finding your personal charism
How to get started prayer doodling, especially if you judge your own art abilities
Praying in a time of desolation
Letting go of perfectionism
Grieving lost dreams well and accepting difficulties
Your questions for Ali answered!

Resources

See Honora's homecoming here!
Find Ali on social @theoodlesofdoodles
Ali's website and shop
Be Not Afraid Conference talks featuring Stacey, Ali and 40+ other Catholic speakers and musicians- FREE!
Searching for and Maintaining Peace by Fr. Jacques Philipe

Join the Called and Caffeinated Patreon Community! Monthly video chats with Stacey and friends, and access to Stacey's faith and lifestyle podcast, Coffee Sips! Pledges start at just $5/month.

This episode is sponsored by Catholic Match. Don't miss the chance to win a FREE premium 6-month subscription when you click THIS link and set up a free profile (it only takes a few minutes!) Nothing else required- just sign up before May 30!

Life is mushy. It’s exhausting living in the gray. That’s why tuning into our inner compass- conscience- and learning what the voice of the Holy Spirit sounds like, are vital in discerning everyday decisions. God doesn’t care what color shoes we choose. But many small decisions are important because they add up to the big moments. The more we’re attuned to the ‘quickening’ of the Holy Spirit, the better we can make each little decision (and the quicker we'll know!)

The nerd in me loved learning Greek words associated with discernment from my guest in this episode, author Tim Ferrara. Discernment is both a gift and a muscle that you build and exercise, and today’s episode provides everything you need to form your discernment training plan.

I recorded this episode back in November. At that point I was a week into an unplanned but necessary two-month social media hiatus. If you sometimes wonder why you keep scrolling, I think this one will be great for you.

Topics Discussed

Diakrisis- the Greek origin and meanings of discernment
How studying a dollar bill teaches us to identify counterfeit truth
“Living your best life:” New age or authentically Christian?
The Holy Spirit as ‘family lawyer’
Kronos vs. Kairos: How these Greek descriptions of 2 different kinds of time help us discern
3 questions to discern whether you’re called to be on social media
Why the Israelites had to kill a sheep to leave Egypt, and what it means for us
Learn to tune into how events, things and people affect your spirit

Resources

Everyday Discernment Book and podcast
Find Tim on Social @discerningdadd
St. Ignatius of Loyola’s Spiritual Exercises
Come on pilgrimage with me to the Holy Land! January 2022.

This episode is sponsored by Catholic Match. Don't miss the chance to win a FREE premium 6-month subscription when you click THIS link and set up a free profile (it only takes a few minutes!) Nothing else required- just sign up before May 30!

It's been the wildest ride of our lives. At publishing time we're on day 93 in the NICU. John and I took listener questions and I think this episode will speak to anyone going through a hard time.

Topics Discussed

How have John and I supported each other?
How have we reconciled the human negative emotions with being a faithful Christian?
How do we deal with the vulnerability of the situation around strangers and sharing this experience?
Will this experience prevent us from having more kids?
How can people support parents of babies in the NICU?
How has the experience been for Raffy and Zelie?
Where have we seen God?

Resources

Come on pilgrimage with us! Jan 2022 we are taking flight to the Holy Land and we'd love to have you along for the adventure!
Stacey's blog on our family's journey
Fr. James Brent's video- Offer It Up
Trustful Surrender to Divine Providence

This episode is sponsored by Catholic Match. To start your Catholic love story with a FREE profile click here!

“People will listen to whoever steps in front of the mic. Why aren’t we proclaiming the Gospel? There’s people who are hungry and thirsty, who want to be spoken words of truth. It takes boldness, courage, and a certain humility to step in front of the crowd and share what’s on your heart.”

This episode is several seemingly opposite things- half my super vulnerable struggles with my premature daughter's NICU journey (which is 2 1/2 months long and counting!) and half Fr. Mark Goring's wonderful YouTube ministry.

Topics Discussed

The charism and community life of Fr. Mark’s order, the Companions of the Cross
Stacey’s struggle with her daughter’s NICU journey
Why do bad things happen to innocent people?
Iron sharpens iron: Why your vocation should not be comfortable
Why do bad things have to happen to us?
Building a bonfire to enkindle each other: The importance of community
Having confidence in God through difficulties
How do you trust God after you’ve been hurt?
How to discern whether or not to speak up about particular issues
Mark’s method for making a YouTube video every day

Resources

Come on Pilgrimage with Stacey to the Holy Land, January 2021!
Fr. Mark’s YouTube channel
The Companions of the Cross
Blessed Carlo Acutis’s website on Eucharistic miracles
A Call to a Deeper Love by Sts. Louis and Zelie Martin
Book- Eucharistic Miracles of the World

This episode is sponsored by Catholic Match. To start your FREE profile click here!

Join the Called and Caffeinated Patreon Community! Monthly video chats with Stacey and friends, and access to Stacey's faith and lifestyle podcast, Coffee Sips! Pledges start at just $5/month.

“We have nothing to prove and everything to share.”

Anyone else feel simultaneously like the weird Catholic in their artist’s circle, and also the weird artist in their Catholic circle? I firmly believe people of faith are called to creativity. One of my most commonly asked questions is, “How did you keep your faith during your Broadway career?” I knew immediately I wanted to record an episode on this with the Mitchell sisters. Melissa and Madison are NYC actor friends who not only survived, but thrived in their faith while performing in Les Miserables and Cats on Broadway.

If you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to perform on Broadway, feel called to a creative life, or want to crush an unhealthy competitive mindset, this one’s for you! Please be a friend and share with anyone who needs to hear this episode.

Topics Discussed

Melissa’s story of surrendering her career/passion for theater before she found success on Broadway
How to keep motherhood and creativity compatible
Why creative women shouldn’t be afraid of motherhood
Letting go of the need to prove yourself
Replacing competition with teamwork
How to grow and nurture your faith in a secular city/profession
Handling conversations/comments you don’t want to partake in

Resources

Join the God's Adventure Awaits Holy Land Pilgrimage, Jan 17-25 2022!
Be Not Afraid Conference: “Take Courage” by Melissa and Stephen Davies
Catholic NYC- great resources for Young Adult Catholics in NYC!
Catholic Artist Connection NYC
Follow Stacey @staceysumereau, Melissa @treelilymusic, and Madison @madison.mitchell

This episode is sponsored by the Hallow prayer app. For a FREE 30-day trial of the premium subscription and to support this show, click HERE!

You're invited to join the Called and Caffeinated Patreon Community! Starting at just $5/mo you get access to cool perks like monthly video chats with Stacey and community members around the country, as well as Stacey's Faith and Lifestyle show Coffee Sips. Thanks for supporting the show!

“You might have talents that are weird, like maybe you could work in the Yankee Candle lab to find what scents best induce Christmas cheer. And if you have the best nose, then I say get after it! Get after the candles!”

When I was a kid, I got sculpey clay one Christmas. Sculpting became one of my fun little childhood hobbies. In high school, my mom found a book at the library on making clay caricatures of people. For a 10th grade school project, I made a doll of my teacher and left it on his desk. Mr. Westhoff was so excited he carried it around the school interrupting other teacher's classes to show them his "mini me!" Years later, my weird hobby turned into a nice side business sculpting keepsake replicas of my castmates on the Beauty and the Beast National tour in costume.

When my little sculpting hobby turned into a business, many of my friends and family weren't surprised at all. The standard reaction was, "Oh yeah, I can totally see you doing that." I wondered, what took me so long to see it? So often in my life, it seems everyone else can see me better than I see myself.

God wants us to use all our odd, specific, unique talents. Sometimes learning to recognize them and giving them air is the hardest part. It's easy to write off those individual talents because they don't fit into a neat little box. My guest today, Fr. Gregory Pine (of Godsplaining and Pints with Aquinas fame,) will help instill confidence into following your unique path. Fr. Gregory is one of the smartest, funniest people I've ever met, and he brings incredible wisdom from a contemplative soul.

Topics Discussed

The art of savoring life through the senses: Good food, company, alcohol, etc.
Discernment is living in what is real
Gregory’s vocational discernment story
Finding God’s will through your desires
How to stop “analysis paralysis”
Your vocation is “testimony” and what that means
God breaking you down, and how it’s actually necessary
Do you get all virtues when you acquire one?
How to know which virtues you’re called to manifest specifically

Resources

Gregory’s Godsplaining podcast on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook @Godsplaining
Come on the God’s Adventure Awaits Pilgrimage to the Holy Land in Jan 2022!

This epsiode is sponsored by Catholic Match, the largest dating platform specifically for Catholics. It's how I met my husband! In a world where it's becoming harder to find fellow Catholics, I recommend all my single friends give it a try! Clicking this link will allow you to create a FREE profile AND support my show.

Join the Called and Caffeinated Patreon Community! Starting at just $5/month, get access to cool perks like my secondary podcast Coffee Sips and monthly video chats with our awesome community. Your support allows me to continue creating unique content for your spiritual journey!

This year I’ve been shadowbanned for being pro-life. I've received dozens of the nastiest comments attempting to shame and insult me for being a conservative and a Catholic. It got me thinking of my visit to Rome a few years ago when I visited the Church of Santo Stephano Rotondo. 34 gory, stomach-turning murals line the walls depicting the most unpleasant torture and death of early Christians. After getting over my initial “ouch ouch ouch” reaction, I began to notice that the martyr’s faces looked serene and even joyful. I'll never forget deeply realizing that, if pain and even death can’t overpower Christ and his followers, literally nothing can.

As censorship on social media ramps up and mainstream media outlets persistently ignore or twist truth, I think of the Apostles. One moment they cowered in the Upper Room; the next they boldly preached to the whole world. God’s opinion of them and his Kingdom were all that mattered. Maybe it won't mean literal martyrdom, but like them, I believe we’re being called to extraordinary heroism in 2021.

I firmly believe that God is waiting to strengthen us in supernatural ways to meet the demands of these dark times, if we ask him to.

New Year’s Resolutions…most years I could take ‘em or leave ‘em. But in these unusual times I believe it’s essential to survey the battleground, size up what we’re facing, and form an action plan. In my first ever solo podcast I’m sharing 5 goals that’ve been percolating in my mind and heart to prepare for 2021.

Topics Discussed

Setting your expectations: the battle has begun
Identifying the people, places and things that nourish and strengthen you
Forming an actionable plan
Which virtues to specifically pray for
Identifying your unique call

Resources

Come on Pilgrimage to the Holy Land with me! (and see the gorgeous new promo video HERE)
Murals in the Church of Santo Stefano Rotondo in Rome
8 Questions to Determine Whether God or Satan is Speaking

This episode is sponsored by the Hallow App, my favorite way to pray. It's an authentically Catholic version of other meditation apps. Get a free 30-day trial of the premium version by clicking here!

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ANNOUNCING THE JAN 2022 GOD'S ADVENTURE AWAITS PILGRIMAGE TO THE HOLY LAND! Join me and fellow pilgrims to walk in the places where Jesus walked, discern your God-given mission and purpose, and experience the food and culture of Israel. Celebrate mass afloat on the Sea of Galilee and see Bethlehem, Jerusalem, Nazareth, Mt. Tabor, the Mount of the Beatitudes, and much more!

“God doesn’t just give you one call…he insists on changing your life and your heart.” As a native of the little town of Bethlehem, growing up just a five-minute walk from where Jesus was born, Khaled Jacoub was imbued with a sense of mission from his earliest days. He's the founder of Nativity Pilgrimage, the company I'm proud to partner with for the God's Adventure Awaits Pilgrimage in 2022. Jacoub hosts more than 200 groups from the USA to visit his beloved native Holy Land.

Since I began this podcast it's been on my heart to do an episode on pilgrimages. They're not just a vacation; they're a time-honored tradition recommended by the Church since the Middle Ages as a way to discern your personal mission and purpose. I'm delighted to speak with Jacoub about what it was like growing up in the Holy Land, and how to make an effective pilgrimage.

WATCH ON YOUTUBE HERE

Topics Discussed

What is a pilgrimage and how it’s different from a vacation
How people in Bethlehem feel their mission is to make everyone feel at home
The FOOD in Israel (very important to pregnant Stacey lol)
Why Christians are leaving the Holy Land in droves, and the role Nativity Pilgrimage is playing to help keep them there
How to approach a pilgrimage to get the most spiritual benefit
The best sites in the Holy Land to visit (there are many!)

I was super nervous before my wedding night about sex. I didn’t know how to go about finding the right NFP method, and approaching married people with personal questions was embarrassing. The whole deal felt kinda… gross. John and I were promised a “honeymoon every month” in our marriage prep class, but living the reality was extremely hard. We felt disillusioned and bitter. Anyone else out there?

This is THE exact convo I wish I’d heard in those times. I loved chatting with Bridget Busacker, the founder of Managing Your Fertility, in this share-all, no topics barred, totally honest episode. She details the three different types of NFP and how to know which one will work best for you. We don’t sugar-coat it: NFP is hard requires sacrifice. The conversation needs way more nuance than can fit in an Instagram post or pre-Cana retreat talk. But we also don’t skimp on sharing the depth of love, communication, joy, and intimacy that’s made possible.

I have a favor to ask: Can you please pass this on to a single friend who’d benefit from it? And would you mind taking 1 min to leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts? Thank you!!

Topics Discussed

The three different types of NFP
How to know which method is best for you
Choosing an NFP instructor
Can you switch methods?
Getting past the weirdness of cervical mucus, cycles, sex, etc.
Ditching the “honeymoon every month” lie for an authentic, nuanced inside scoop on using NFP
Prioritizing and choosing your spouse on a daily basis
Achieving simultaneous orgasm- yup, we go there!

Resources

Managing Your Fertility, Bridget's website
Holy Sex! Book
Humanae Vitae by Pope St. John Paul the Great
Own Your Belovedness by Sarah Kroger

This episode is sponsored by Stacey Sumereau’s shop. FREE shipping on every single USA order! Buy beautiful handmade earrings, hand-designed apparel and prints, durable vinyl stickers, and digital access to inspirational talks by clicking here.

This episode is also sponsored by the Hallow Prayer app. Try a 30-day FREE trial of the premium version by clicking here! Find out why it’s the #1 Catholic prayer app in the USA.

Holy Sex!: A Catholic Guide to Toe-Curling, Mind-Blowing, Infallible Loving

One million children experience their parents’ divorce each year. Two-thirds of them who were regularly attending a Church or synagogue at the time report that no one reached out to them at that time. Parents’ divorce increases their children’s chance of divorce by 40%. And barely any Catholic dioceses have an outreach for it.

My friend Sarah Hart travels to speak at healing retreats and blogs with the ministry Life-Giving Wounds, one of the few Catholic ministry outreaches to adult children of divorced parents. As a graduate of the JPII Institute for Marriage and Family, and herself a child of divorced parents, Sarah has helped many people give voice to their pain and find healing. If you or someone you love has lived through the trauma of parental divorce, this discussion is for you.

WATCH ON YOUTUBE HERE

Topics Discussed

Why divorce is a “primal wound,” and the healing power of discovering your deeper God-given identity
Healing boundaries and learning to form new intimate relationships
How wounds can become life-giving resources and help heal others in turn
Forgiveness that sticks: going beyond the initial retreat weekend to live forgiveness

Resources

Life-Giving Wounds website: Blog, book lists, upcoming events (including online Holiday Support Group talks on November 19 and December 17)
Pontifical Institute of John Paul II for Studies on Marriage and Family
Upcoming Diocese of Arlington Healing Retreat
Books: Between Two Worlds: The Inner Lives of Children of Divorce by Elizabeth Marquardt
Primal Loss: The Now Adult Children of Divorce Speak by Leila Miller
The Children of Divorce, The Loss of Family as a Loss of Being by Andrew Root
Torn Asunder: The Myth of the Good Divorce, and the Recovery of Origins by Margaret McCarthy
Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life by Cloud and Townsend
Sarah Hart’s email: sarah.dan.hart@gmail.com

This episode is sponsored by Hallow Prayer App. It’s the #1-rated Catholic app in the USA, and it’s free to download. Click here to download a FREE 30-day trial of the premium version including over 500 guided meditations for sleep, peace, discernment, and much more. (There’s always a free version too.) I use Hallow daily and I invite you to give it a try!

This episode is also sponsored by my shop! New stickers, prints and handmade clay earrings have just been released in addition to beautiful apparel. Enjoy FREE shipping on all US orders, plus save 25% on 5-item collections. Please consider purchasing a hug from God and supporting my ministry this Christmas!

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I admit; I envied other girls in high school terribly. (Hello, insecurity!) Unless I could have that girl’s hair, or that other girl’s confidence or whatever other quality I saw that I wanted, I wasn’t good enough. Ladies, been there? It didn’t occur to my immature teenage brain that I wasn’t supposed to be like anyone else. That there was something unique I had to do in the world. That appreciating other women’s qualities and building them up was much, much better than comparing myself to them. I had so much learning to do about how to be a woman. I never knew that my Catholic Faith had so much truth to offer about womanhood.

If you’re like me, you’ve heard the term “feminine genius” for years but never found out exactly what that means. I knew Liv Harrison, founder of the Genius Women’s Conference, would be the perfect person to talk about this beautiful concept coined by Pope St. John Paul II. Liv showed me the feminine genius in action back in March when I desperately needed help coordinating the massive Be Not Afraid Conference in just five days. She stepped in to volunteer and cheerlead me. So when I thought of who I’d like to have on the show to talk about the feminine genius, I knew there’d be no one better than Liv! She’s hilarious and wise- enjoy and be inspired! (p.s. Gentlemen, I think you'll get a lot out of this episode too!

Topics Discussed

What is the feminine genius?
How can women be both strong and classically feminine?
What women bring to the world
How the feminine genius meshes (and where it doesn’t mesh) with feminism
Replacing competition and comparison with community
Universal and specific aspects of the feminine genius

Resources

Strength Finders Book
Find Liv online: https://www.thelivharrison.com/
Social @thelivharrison
Find Liv's Talk to Me Podcast everywhere you find fine podcasts!

This episode is sponsored by Hallow Prayer App. For a 30-day free trial of the premium version of the app click here!

Join the Called and Caffeinated Patreon Community starting at just $5/month! Not only is your support meaningful for the continued provision of this unique, meaningful content, but you'll also get access to monthly video chats with me and the community members, as well as my bi-monthly secondary podcast Coffee Sips. Click here to learn more!

“If the bullets are going away from you, you’re going the wrong way!”

WATCH ON YOUTUBE HERE

I'm fascinated by the life of Sr. Dede Byrne, today's guest. I first encountered her speaking at the Republican National Convention where she literally held up her rosary and called it her 'weapon of love.' Sr. Dede served as a Colonel in the Army for years before entering the community of the Little Workers of the Sacred Hearts of Jesus and Mary. As a physician, she's given medical care to both Mother Teresa and members of the Taliban, and she served in the immediate aftermath of the Sep 11th attacks. Not only that, but she helps women who regret their decision to abort reverse the abortion pill and serves poor immigrants with free healthcare.

Enjoy this rich discussion. (Plus, I'll be sharing how quoting her got me Insta-banned...apparently being pro-life is hate speech...) Sr. Dede says, “the ultimate call is to be all for Jesus," and in these tumultuous days you'll love the inspiration she offers.

Topics Discussed

Speaking truth in love: How Sr. Dede lovingly encourages her patients to change sinful habits and accompanies them to change
Aftermath and reactions to her speech at the Republican National Convention
Spiritual warfare: What the devil wants
The war on speech: Stacey’s Instagram ban for quoting Sr. Dede in a pro-life post
What people on all sides of the abortion debate can learn from Sr. Dede’s work helping women who regret taking an abortion pill

Resources

Sr. Dede’s order- Little Workers of the Sacred Hearts of Jesus and Mary
Abortion Pill Reversal website (for women who regret taking their abortion pill and want to reverse it within 72 hours)
Dr. Delgado’s life-affirming research- the Steno Institute

Join the Called and Caffeinated Patreon Community starting at just $5/month! Not only is your support meaningful for the continued provision of this unique, meaningful content, but you'll also get access to monthly video chats with me and the community members, as well as my bi-monthly secondary podcast Coffee Sips. Click here to learn more!

Gulp. Politics. Not gonna lie, folks; I’ve been terrified to podcast about voting. Many issues are highly incendiary and in our cancel culture it’s daunting. I know I'm not alone as I wrestle with answers to the hard questions. But as I read Clear Conscience, A Catholic Guide to Voting by Matthew Pinto, CEO and founder of Ascension Press, I gained hope knowing that in this confusing world there can be clarity. The Church and Matthew’s book won’t tell you for whom to vote, but it will empower you to think with the mind of 2,000 years of the Catholic Church's wisdom.

I think you’ll think, as I often did through the interview, "Wow, that just makes so much sense!" You don't often get clarity with politics, amen?? We didn’t get to cover every issue so you’ll just have to buy the book, but our convo is a great starting point!

Topics Discussed

Prudential judgement and absolute moral imperatives: Which are which? (Hint: we generally have staggering freedom to form our own opinions!)
Patriotism: how-to, warts and all
Overwhelming emotion: the enemy to clear, reasoned thinking
Black lives matter, but should we sign on for the Black Lives Matter movement?
What to do if you agree with a candidate on everything except abortion issues
Seeking truth free from emotion
Compassion: do we care more about looking caring than actually being caring?
Why it’s not usually the government’s job to care for the poor
Who you CAN’T vote for in November based on the Church’s few absolute moral imperatives

Resources

Wanna see that Insta-banned post? Come on over to @staceysumereau on IG (and follow if you like what you see!)

Buy Clear Conscience: A Catholic Guide to Voting by Matthew Pinto and Ascension Press editors

Join the Called and Caffeinated Patreon Community starting at just $5/month! Not only is your support meaningful for the continued provision of this unique, meaningful content, but you'll also get access to monthly video chats with me and the community members, as well as my bi-monthly secondary podcast Coffee Sips. Click here to learn more!

“It would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.” -C.S. Lewis

Called and Caffeinated is back and better than ever (if I do say so myself!) This conversation with Dominick Albano, author of The Fundamental Theory of Happiness, was recorded all the way back in February. However, releasing now it seems more relevant than ever after a tumultuous Spring and Summer 2020.

Have you ever wondered why some people just don't seem to get bothered by, well...anything? Do you ever find yourself discontented, wondering, "Is this all there is?" Lockdown gave many of us ample time to think about our purpose and why we're here. The stillness has spurred many people I know to discern their choices anew and desire an authentic life. Today's episode dives into the secrets of fundamentally happy people and how to begin living like them starting now. Your hungry heart was made to be filled, and I believe to the depths of my soul that God wants happiness for you.

Topics Discussed

The five levels of awareness and how to live at the highest, the level of purpose
The permanence principle: How to discover your purpose
Pier Giorgio Frassati's life teaches us why living backwards can make us happy
Allow yourself to become dissatisfied- it's the first step to true happiness!
The question that'll immediately make you understand what needs to change in your lifestyle
The fundamental truth "We define everything by what it does, except ourselves," and why it matters

Resources

Buy The Fundamental Theory of Happiness- use code CALLED for 15% off the book!

Have you discerned joining the Called and Caffeinated Patreon Community? Starting at just $5/mo you get access to my secondary podcast Coffee Sips as well as monthly video chats and lots of other perks! Plus it supports my unique ministry to keep producing content you won't find anywhere else. Click here to learn more!

FREE Virtual Summit July 31-Aug 2 2020! A dream event about discerning ALL vocations featuring 40+ of your favorite speakers: Sr. Bethany Madonna, Jackie and Bobby Angel, Jason Evert, Sr. Helena Burns, Fr. Mark Goring, Joe Melendrez, Mary Lenaburg, Fr. Timothy Gallagher, Cameron Fradd, Meg Hunter-Kilmer, Matt and Erin Ingold, Katie Prejean McGrady, and MANY more! Also featuring the world's first virtual Meet and Greet for mission organizations and religious communities!

Sign up here: Staceysumereau.com/adventure

True North Course: Staceysumereau.com/true-north

PLEASE be a friend and help spread the word to anyone you know who could use this smorgasboard of wisdom. Nowhere else will you find an event or a course like this, designed especially for discerning life choices :) Thank you so much!

“Maybe you should start putting your life into two categories: a no or a hell yes.”

Many times I've wondered, "When do things stop changing? When do I get to stop re-adjusting and just be?" The answer is, never. Kathryn Whitaker, mom of six and author of Live Big, Love Bigger, has incredible perspective on coping when plans change. As a mom of six children, one of whom has dealt with ongoing health issues, and in dealing with health issues herself, Kathryn is a bastion of resilience and hope.

We also dive into her conversion and how she learned to hear God's calls as a Protestant youngster. I feel like Catholics can learn so much from the way many of our Protestant brothers and sisters listen for God's voice as though he wants to speak to them personally....because he does!

Topics Discussed

“Attitude readjustment hour:” How-to
How to course-correct faster every time plans change
Building resilience
Prioritizing in busy family life

Resources

Live Big, Love Bigger by Kathryn Whitaker
FREE God's Adventure Awaits Summit July 31-Aug 2- Register here!

This episode is sponsored by Guadalupe Roastery, a family-owned Catholic coffee company whose mission is to produce exceptional coffee and support fair wages for South American coffee farmers (most only make $5-7 per day!) You can score 10% off the most delicious coffee using code CAFFEINATED10. Visit www.guadaluperoastery.com and be an agent for positive change!

“All around us we see an impersonal lifestyle trying to invade the family and take away its richness, its culture, its ability to reflect the Trinity in its communion of persons. You’re not alone: you CAN find heaven in your home. It’s not just home base, a place to put your stuff, an entertainment center, or bricks and mortar. It’s a domestic church- a Trinity house!”

Catholicism and coffee are among my favorite things (in case you can't guess from the title of my podcast,) so when I found Trinity House Cafe, a Catholic coffee shop in Leesburg VA, I told my husband, "it's essentially what Heaven will be like for me!" Nothing could be more apt, because "Heaven in Your Home" is the tagline of Trinity House Founders Soren and Ever Johnson. Their masters degrees in theology inform the menu, atmosphere, ethos, and decor of their cafe to cultivate culture... starting with great sandwiches and coffee. Whatever your walk of life, you'll love our discussion about making your home a "trinity house."

We're not all called to be online entrepreneurs, start awareness movements, or be thought leaders. But all of us are called to love our neighbor, starting at home. Soren and Ever witnessed a poverty of family love and this is their initiative to make a difference, starting in their community. I think you'll be empowered by their "think globally, act locally" mindset, and you'll love the richness of the discussion. We get pretty theological in discussing Trinitarian relationships, so pour a good strong cup of coffee and enjoy!

Topics Discussed

Moving from a cerebral faith into a familial, communal, cultural, “lived” faith.
What does “heaven in your home” look like?
The five levels of interpersonal communion
Finding our identity in our relationship with each person of the Trinity

Resources

Trinity House Café’s Website- If you live near Leesburg VA, go! (They are now reopened after coronavirus quarantine!)
Trinity House Community
Heaven in Your Home Workshops (I highly recommend signing up for a free workshop with Soren and Ever!)
Arlington Catholic Herald Article about Soren and Ever's endeavor
Christus Vivit by Pope Francis
Stacey’s viral Facebook post on foot washing

"I’d encourage you to just enjoy messaging and talking to them and be grateful for every interaction- it’s good to be interacting with other brothers and sisters in Christ. And only good things will come from it if you approach it that way."

Watch on YouTube here!

Are you considering online dating but are a bit weirded out by it? John and I were too, but we ended up finding each other through a dating site. We’re sharing our tips on how to get the most out of your online dating experience, stay mentally healthy, and ENJOY it! Then we're sharing our long-awaited story of what happened after Stacey's reality TV show "The Sisterhood: Becoming Nuns" aired, and how we got engaged just 5 months after first meeting. We hope it'll alleviate stress and give clarity to our single friends. (p.s. we're not sponsored by any dating websites; this is just our honest testimony.)

Topics Discussed

How to get the most out of online dating
How to stay sane and mentally healthy and ENJOY online dating
What women want from a man’s profile (and vice versa)
For ladies: how to let a man take the lead online and deal with overwhelm
How we knew we were called to marry each other
Why discerning religious life wasn’t wasted time

You’re invited to the Called and Caffeinated Patreon Community! Access to Stacey’s Faith and Lifestyle Podcast Coffee Sips as well as monthly group video chats and other perks! Pledges start at just $5/month. Visit Patreon.com/CalledandCaffeinated to learn more.

SUBSCRIBE at staceysumereau.com

“You don’t have to ‘pray.’ Just sit and let Jesus love your heart.”

WATCH SHOW ON YOUTUBE

Apologies, tears, unfiltered opinions...all here. After all, we were on a reality show together....;)

It's the FIRST EVER cast reunion of "The Sisterhood: Becoming Nuns!" Christie Porter (Young,) Claire Halbur, Eseni Ellington, Francesca DiPaola, and Stacey Sumereau (Jackson) have had a lot going on in the last five years. Collectively there have been 2 marriages and 4 babies, entering and leaving the convent, appearing on more reality shows, consecrated virginity, liquor sales, public speaking, mission work, and a job with one of the orders of Sisters from the show.

Please join me in praying for Francesca's family: she lost her father to COVID-19 on Easter 2020 :(

Topics Discussed

What Claire’s call to consecrated virginity looked like
Our answer to the question: "How much of the TV show was real?"
Our journeys leading up to getting on the TV show
Our spiritual progress in the last five years
Dealing with judgement from people who watched the show (p.s. non-Christians were WAY more judgmental of us than actual nuns were!)
Stacey’s childhood ambition to be a trashman

Resources

SALT Mission Program with the Carmelite Sisters
Find us on social: Francesca @chescadipaola, Claire @clairejmh, Stacey @staceysumereau, Christie @christieyoung07, Eseni @eseniellington

"What if fear is along for the ride, but doesn't get to sit in the driver's seat?"

CALLED AND CAFFEINATED IS NOW ALSO ON YOUTUBE! WATCH HERE: https://youtu.be/tyEc3PVnUoI

The coronavirus pandemic is hugely limiting our access to in-person events, but ministry is still happening. Today I'm having coffee with three other innovators who heard the Holy Spirit's call as the world seemed to fall apart in March, and responded with creativity. God works fast in hard times, and we're sharing what that call looked and felt like.

In April, Matt and Erin Ingold of Metanoia Catholic founded the Virtual Catholic Conference with 64,000 people tuning in. They organized the dozens of presenters in a matter of weeks. Joe Condit, president of the Catholic Speakers Bureau, (the largest Catholic Speakers organization in the world,) started the Inspire Word series that's connected people with their favorite speakers around the world. And my Be Not Afraid Conference came together in five days with 43 presenters and over 13,000 attendees.

Enjoy!

Topics Discussed

What the call to something new felt like
How God's plan can involve all the skill sets you never thought you'd use
Using what already exists in an innovative way
Overcoming fear and self-doubt when attempting something new

Resources

The Be Not Afraid Conference materials are still available for free here! Instant access to talks from amazing speakers like Jackie Francois, Fr. Rob Galea, Mary Lenaburg, Joe Melendrez, Meg Hunter-Kilmer, and so many more.
Connect with Joe: www.catholicspeakers.com, www.inspireword.com
Connect with Matt and Erin: www.metanoiacatholic.com, www.virtualcatholicconference.com

Nothing is normal, including this Spirit-led Conference I'm launching Friday 3.20.2020. BE NOT AFRAID is a wild idea Holy Spirit put in my head last Sunday (yes, that's 3 days ago,) to launch this Friday (yes that's FIVE DAYS to launch an entire conference!!!!) You can get all signed up here.

Today is Wednesday, 3 days after I started reaching out to speakers and 2 days after marketing began.

3,102 people registered for the conference.

Over 30 speakers presenting.

WHAT IS HAPPENING Holy Spirit? I never, ever get to use the word "impossible" as long as I live!

Here are the BE NOT AFRAID speakers/musicians so far:

Stacey Sumereau. Jackie Francois Angel. Bobby Angel. Mary Lenaburg. Leah Darrow. Fr. Rob Galea. Fr. Jared Cooke. Sr. Miriam James Heidland. Heather Khym. Michelle Benzinger. Liv Harrison. Ashley Dean. Sarah Swafford. Fr. Barry Braum. Ali Hoffman. Johnny Philp. Maria Abbe. Melissa Grace Tablada. Kathryn Whitaker. Nick Dela Torre. Alina Dela Torre. Katie Prejean McGrady. Mike Tenney. Lauren Montgomery. Allison Sullivan. Fr. Stephen Gadberry. Joshua Mazrin. Annie Deddens. Joe Melendrez. Melissa Davies. Stephen Davies. Lindsay Schlegel. Taylor Schroll. Kelsey Skoch. Emily Stimpson Chapman. Marie Miller. Meg Hunter-Kilmer. Hannah Schaefer.

Guys, this is epic. PLEASE tell your friends and join me! Let's make the Holy Spirit's love contagious and his inspiration go viral!

“If he’s calling us to something, we don’t have to worry about what we lose in answering that call.”

A working theory of mine about discernment is that it leads you to what you really want. Yup, you read that right. You get what YOU really want. I believe this because I believe that when God designed us, he planted desire for his plans deep in our hearts. Our deepest desire and his desire are the same thing. Discernment is the process of sorting through all the lesser, fluffy layers and discovering that core desire, kind of like a miner goes through layers before striking gold.

Why am I introducing an episode about sex this way? Because discerning what we most deeply want for our relationships is the same thing as discovering God's plan for relationships. And that desire God has given us is chastity (no that's not synonymous with abstinence.) Chastity sounds boring, but it's incredibly life-giving. YES John and I as married people need to live out chastity...and I geek out a bit with our personal testimony of how that looks in married life.

Arleen Spenceley has been on the front lines of explaining and defending chastity for years, from publishing articles in newspapers with her testimony of happy virginity to writing her book Chastity is for Lovers. Whether you're single, married, or religious, you'll learn something new and be equipped to live both counter-culturally and happily.

Topics Discussed

How the martyrs had enough trust in God to die for him
Chastity vs. abstinence: THEY’RE SO DIFFERENT
The deep ache of wanting validation and how to deal with it
The one indispensable thing you need to live out chastity
How far is too far?
Forgiving yourself if you’ve made past mistakes

Resources

iMom.com: A wonderful resource for moms for which Arleen is an editor and Stacey is a contributor
Arleen’s book Chastity is for Lovers
CBN.com/unhooked
Melanie Smith’s episode of Called and Caffeinated

Enjoying Called and Caffeinated? Please consider supporting Stacey's ministry by joining the Called and Caffeinated Patreon community. Video chats with Stacey and fellow community members, exclusive access to Stacey's faith and lifestyle podcast Coffee Sips, and week-long self-paced spiritual challenges all included starting at just $5 per month! Click here to check it out and discern it :)

Chastity Is for Lovers: Single, Happy, and (Still) a Virgin

"The woman at the well and Jesus- what did they have in common? A love of cold water on a hot day. Our Lord, in his very tender willingness to come to our level, finds what we have in common and that’s the beginning of the conversation."

I have so many questions about being a Catholic in the USA today. What should guide our decision when choosing a movie? How do we evangelize and communicate effectively when our culture is losing the ability to dialogue? How do we lovingly challenge someone whose values differs from ours? How closely should we be following the Amazon synod and crisis in the Church? What should we do to maintain our Faith when disturbing news from the Vatican wrecks our peace?

When I first made my list of dream guests for this show in 2018, Patrick Coffin was on it. Dreams do come true! If you think I'm a good interviewer, it's because of Patrick. I binge-watched the Patrick Coffin show on YouTube. He was the host of Catholic Answers Live for over a decade and has interviewed almost literally EVERYBODY. I'm beyond thrilled to share this verbophile's take on discerning our Catholic response to popular culture.

This interview is guaranteed to bump up your IQ at least a few points, or your money back ;)

Topics Discussed

The interplay between my will and God’s will
The fascinating story of how Patrick had a disastrous audition for Catholic Answers Live, and how he knew he was called
Seeking the incarnation and discerning our personal tolerance in our movie consumption
Debate about hot topic issues on social media, or no?
Authentic masculinity
The power of mimetic activity
What does it mean that God is a jealous God?
How to become unafraid to evangelize
Church crisis and Amazon synod: Follow like it's your job? Ignore?

Resources

Cursillo movement
Mike Rowe: "Don’t Follow Your Passion"
Call of the Void Movie co-written by Patrick Coffin
Encyclicals on movie consumption: Vigilante Cura and Miranda Proursus
The Tree of Life and To the Wonder directed by Terence Malick
One of Patrick’s interviews with Jordan Peterson
Patrick's interview with Milo Yiannopoulos

This episode is sponsored by the Beloved and Worthy Challenge, a 7-day scriputral retreat for claiming and living out of your true identity as a beloved child of God. Every purchase supports Stacey's ministry! Get yours here.

You can get the Beloved and Worthy Challenge FREE (as well as access to all future challenges) when you join Stacey's Patreon community. Membership starts at just $5/mo and includes exclusive access to Coffee Sips, Stacey's other podcast, and monthly video chats with Stacey. Discern joining here!

“God’s primary calls come to you through a combination of opportunity, interest, and talent.”

Have you ever felt as though you're too young, too old, unqualified, overqualified, or in some other way inadequate? The devil LOVES to make us believe that we have to be something other than we are to successfully start tackling God's callings. Nothing could be farther from the truth. God uses every single part of our story for the glory of His Kingdom. Owning your story means accepting your individuality, rejecting comparison, allowing him to redeem your wounds, recognizing how God is working in the mess, and realizing that every moment is valuable...including the waiting for your vocation.

I first encountered Emily Stimpson Chapman on Instagram. Writing is Emily's gift and calling for processing her story and sharing beauty and truth with the world. There were multiple topics I knew she'd provide valuable insight on...so we're covering (almost) all of them!

Topics Discussed

Seeing your own story in light of salvation history
“Vocational orphanhood:” staying strong for those who are single into their 30s and 40s
How it took NINE years of vacillating between dating and friendship before Emily and her husband finally tied the knot
Processing and sharing the difficult parts of your story
How a sacramental worldview saved Emily from an eating disorder
Process scars, not wounds
Emily’s method of her effective Instagram evangelization mission

Resources

Emily’s website and NEW Cookbook to fund her next adoption
Scott Hahn: A Father Who Keeps His Promises
Paul Center Bible Study: A Journey Through Scripture, Genesis to Jesus
Jeff Cavins: Bible Timeline
The Catholic Girl’s Survival Guide to the Single Years by Emily Stimpson Chapman

Today's episode is sponsored by the Cathoholics podcast. Find it here!

To buy curated high-quality gift boxes, visit Pillar and Pearl's website. Every purchase supports Emily as well as a community of Catholic artisans.

"Don't persevere in something that's wrong just for the sake of looking like you know where you're going."

What's the physical aspect of a Catholic marriage really like? What does that woman you want to ask out really want? Should you go on a date with that guy you only like as a friend?

Paul J. Kim is one of the most sought-after speakers today and I had the privilege of sitting down with him to unpack all those things single people need to hear that few people will say. We also dove into Paul's vocation story which included many u-turns and what some would call "wasting time" as a monk for several years (hint: it wasn't.) Hilarious and relevant, I know you'll love hearing Paul's perspective as much as I did.

Topics Discussed

Why you shouldn’t be afraid of “wasting time” by discerning religious life
Fighting in marriage: things single people should know
Red flags: is this a showstopper?
Building a kingdom mindset: God has a plan for singlehood and waiting
How to become a good conversationalist, and MANY other dating tips for guys

Resources

Paul's website
Find Paul on social: Insta: @heypjk, Twitter: @pjkmusic
The Art of Manliness: 5 Do's and Don'ts of Conversation Etiquette

“We fear rejection, but living in the mediocrity of being used is painful in a different way because of its emptiness. The Lord wants to free us from that so we can live in authentic joy.”

Walking down a busy New York City street in a flowing blue and white habit and veil would force you to really think about your, your motivations, and what you stand for, eh? I got to sit down in person with Sr. Bethany Madonna for coffee at the National Catholic Youth Conferences where we were both blessed to be speakers. For those of us who aren't nuns, Sr. Bethany cuts to the heart of what's important and how to live an authentic life surrendered to God. Surrender has been the hardest, most necessary, and most freeing part of my spiritual growth and I'm THRILLED I get to share this conversation with you.

Topics Discussed

Finding courage to speak up for what’s right
Creating a space for God to fill in your heart
The tipping point where Sr. Bethany became excited to be a nun (she didn’t want it for a long time!)
God fulfilling the love language of physical touch in religious life
Charism of the Sisters of Life
We’re all addicted to something

Resources

Sisters of Life website

This episode is sponsored by the Serving the Aged Lovingly Today (SALT) Mission Program hosted by the Carmelite Sisters for the Aged and Infirm. To learn more and apply for this FREE mission opportunity, visit www.carmelitesisters.com/SALT-program

This episode is also sponsored by Delphina Rose Art. Use code CALLED for 10% off your first order! https://delphinaroseart.com

“There is such a great joy of missing out. When we say no to something, we’re saying yes to something greater.”

Funny story: I recorded this episode two days before posting my foot-washing post that went viral (over 17.6 million Facebook views so far!) After recording this episode I took a project I wanted to do to prayer and discerned that I'm called to prioritize my marriage, first and foremost. And then 2 days later God used my surrender to reach incredible numbers of people!

She's young but wise- my guest today Melissa Grace Tablada juggles her calls of being an NFP instructor, marriage and family therapist, wife, and SoulCore fitness instructor. If you're constantly trying to find the balance between handling a busy life and feeling burned out and overcommitted, you'll love our timely conversation as we roll into the new year. If you're like me, turning down new projects is hard, but we also know that ONLY God can be productive 24/7. Enjoy!

Topics Discussed:

Just busy or overcommited?
Simple processes for ruling out what you aren’t called to
Discipline when you’re a creative who wants to do all the things
Prioritizing for busy married people
Setting up your space and prayer routine
Prioritizing for single people
The joy of missing out

Resources

New Website: melissagracetablada.com
Melissa’s YouTube Channel
Instagram: @melissagracetablada
Jason and Crystalina Evert: How to Find Your Soulmate Without Losing Your Soul

This episode is sponsored by the Serving the Aged Lovingly Today (SALT) Mission Program hosted by the Carmelite Sisters for the Aged and Infirm. To learn more and apply for this FREE mission opportunity, visit www.carmelitesisters.com/SALT-program

This episode is also sponsored by Delphina Rose Art. Use code CALLED for 10% off your first order! https://delphinaroseart.com

“When you truly know yourself, then you truly don’t care what anyone thinks of you.”

This episode was originally supposed to be called “How Should You Spend Your Teen Years?” However, my conversation with Mike Tenney covers issues that extend far beyond our teen years for many of us: insecurity, comparison, self-image problems, fear of commitment, pressure to perform/pick a public image, negotiating attraction and dating, and building your interior castle. Mike is a dynamic speaker and high school teacher, (we went to Catholic U together back in the day!) and he’s the real deal when it comes to connecting deep spiritual issues to everyday life. You’ll be healed, illuminated, and will find gems to help you live more intentionally sprinkled all over this episode- I’m so excited to share it with you!

Topics Discussed

When you think you’re called to an unspecified “something big,” and how to wrestle with that
The mental shift that helped me stop being so hard on myself
Becoming a digital disciple
What you should and shouldn’t prioritize in your teen years
You are enough, and here’s why
Should you date in high school? (Mike and I have different opinions on this one!)
Living by design, not by default

Resources

Mike Tenney’s website
Follow Mike on Instagram: @pkmikeyt
The Interior Castle by St. Teresa of Avila
Emotional Virtue by Sarah Swafford

This episode is sponsored by the Serving the Aged Lovingly Today (SALT) Mission Program hosted by the Carmelite Sisters for the Aged and Infirm. To learn more and apply for this FREE mission opportunity, visit www.carmelitesisters.com/SALT-program

This episode is also sponsored by Delphina Rose Art. Use code CALLED for 10% off your first order! https://delphinaroseart.com

“I might not know the meaning of this moment, but if I am convinced that there is a God who loves me then I know that this moment has meaning.”

The man, the myth, the legend: It's Fr. Mike Schmitz!!! If you’ve ever wanted to know his coffee order, you’ll hear ALL the details right down to his favorite roast here. Also, he shares that he might be Superman. He just might be. And you’ll also hear a fun story from my Broadway National Tour about how the Mayor of Munchkinland got arrested trying to cross the Canadian border. If you’re already a fan of Fr. Mike, you’re going to love our deep dive into all things discernment.

At the end of the episode please enjoy my rendition of my favorite Advent song, Gabriel's Message. Simple, haunting, and unspeakably lovely.

Topics Discussed

The three levels of God’s calls that can INSTANTLY help you prioritize
Holier does not always equal harder, but neither should we make decisions to avoid pain
Avoiding comparison
A philosophical meander: Is what we feel in consolation most true in God’s plan for us?
The donuts vs. bacon analogy to help you find your deepest desires
The simple question that will reveal real motivations
Handling expectations when life falls short of what you thought
The real reason you are special, enough, and wanted
Anxiety: how do you know when it comes from an anxiety disorder or from natural jitters over a decision?

Resources

Dan and Amber DeMatte’ episode of Called and Caffeinated
Fr. Mike’s new book, Pray, Decide and Don’t Worry
A Severe Mercy and Under the Mercy by Sheldon Vanauken
The “False” Sanction of Eros by Sheldon Vanauken

This episode is sponsored by the Serving the Aged Lovingly Today (SALT) Mission Program hosted by the Carmelite Sisters for the Aged and Infirm. To learn more and apply for this FREE mission opportunity, visit www.carmelitesisters.com/SALT-program

This episode is also sponsored by Delphina Rose Art. Use code CALLED for 10% off your first order! https://delphinaroseart.com

Pray, Decide, and Don't Worry: Five Steps to Discerning God's Will

"It’s easy to be hyper-focused on the intention, and to be less focused on what God may want in our life. So we need to make that the right priority in our prayers."

How often have you asked "God, just show me what you want me to do and I'll do it?" Or said, "God, WHY WON'T YOU SHOW ME?" I know I said that to God daily during my discernment of religious life. Today's guest, Annie Deddens, is the founder of Pray More Novenas, a website dedicated to helping Catholics finish their 9 day prayers for specific intentions. We talk about how a novena CAN be used and how it SHOULDN'T be used, Annie's stories of hearing from half a million people around the world who are praying together, and some bonus advice for Catholic entrepreneurs on starting something new. Enjoy!

Topics Discussed

What is a novena and what is it for?
Fitting novenas into the bigger picture of discernment: it's not always about the answer
How Annie and John-Paul started Pray More Novenas together
When should you start something you feel called to?
How a novena to St. Therese paved the way for being on my Reality TV show The Sisterhood: Becoming Nuns

Resources

Pray More Novenas- Sign up for FREE Advent Retreat featuring Stacey as a speaker here! (donations optional)
@CatholicWifeCatholicLife on social media
St. Joseph Novena: discerning what to study, moving, buying/selling a house, switching jobs
St. Anne Novena: discerning marriage
St. Therese Novena: discerning a call to religious life
Meg Hunter-Kilmer’s episode on Called and Caffeinated
St. Peregrine Novena- for those suffering from cancer
Surrender Novena- great for discerning ANYTHING
Unanswered Prayers on Catholic Wife, Catholic Life

Every day, every moment, is a building block of God’s plan. Nothing is ever wasted.

It's Called and Caffeinated's first father-daughter interview! Ever have a dream but think, nobody's going to pay me to do that? Ever wonder how to turn the thing you love to do into the thing you get to do all the time? Want to inspire others with your passion for your Faith? You might tell yourself the market is already saturated with creatives, only the very lucky make it, you've got nothing original to offer, blah blah blah. Put aside that judgy voice and get some solid guidance on how to get started here. If God is calling you to make your side hustle your main gig, he'll take care of the success. You just gotta do your side of the work.

Mario Costabile founded Array of Hope, a media company, to move hearts with quality videos, music and witness. His daughter Lauren joined the team later as a singer, speaker and director of social media. The company seeks to spread the gospel message in an understandable way using media that people understand. They saw a need for quality Catholic media and are filling it. Today they're detailing how they went from being a family band playing together at home to a full production company with films on FORMED, EWTN, Shalom World TV, and others.

Friends, I firmly believe the world needs your gifts and God is calling you to use them in some way. You're not too old, too young, too inexperienced, too anything for God to manifest his incredible dreams through you!

Topics Discussed

Social media use: how to use it to evangelize
Getting all the pieces together for a startup
The moment Mario answered the call to begin Array of Hope- he was in his 50s and it took TEN YEARS!
Tuning into your joy as a guidepost
The reality of how long it takes to grow a business
How to know you're heading in the right direction and how to "do it all"
The vital importance of collaborating with those who inspire you

Resources

Array of Hope
Marie Forleo
Joe Melendrez's episode of Called and Caffeinated

Orthodoxy.

Pro-life.

Mass on Sunday.

Rosary.

Doing allllll the Catholic things.

Not enough.

“The Lord really wants me to make him not just a part of my life, but the center.”

In school we learn in a classroom, taking notes and regurgitating information on tests. But that’s not how people learned in Jesus’s day. Apprentices learned by living with their teacher- imitating not just what he did but how and who he was. The legendary Dr. Edward Sri, author of Into His Likeness (and so much more) describes what being a disciple of Christ really looks like.

It’s not just staying in bounds… it’s so much more. And that is the foundation for ALL good discernment.

BONUS: Mozart's gorgeous Ave Verum Corpus. All 4 parts sung by me (singing bass is a fun challenge!) I put a LOT of effort into it for you guys, so I hope you enjoy it!

Topics Discussed

The little Annunciations
Imitating our Rabbi
Surrendering- What do we gain?
Daily practices of a true disciple

Resources

Dr. Sri's SEVEN books here!
Symbolon and Who Am I to Judge? Dr. Sri’s video series on FORMED (Catholic Netflix- inquire if your parish has a subscription!)
All Things Catholic- Sri’s podcast

“I am going to praise the Lord because of who he is and what he has promised. And when I do it repeatedly, it brings life into me and changes my heart.”

Ladies, if you struggle to believe that you have what it takes, if you are jealous of other women, if you’re angry with God because your life isn’t working out the way you wanted, if you struggle to trust God, if you feel caught between following your heart and following your dreams: This episode is for you.

Eve, Sarah, Rahab, Leah, Rachel, Miriam, Deborah, Judith, Esther. These women may have lived a long time ago, but they were REAL. They experienced every struggle you can imagine, including impossible circumstances, inadequacy, carrying the consequences of their sinful actions, infertility, disappointment, being unnoticed, comparison, illness, and jealousy. Fortunately, Sarah Christmyer has already done the work mining the gold nuggets for you!

Sarah is the author of Becoming Women of the Word as well as over a dozen other books and the Great Adventure Bible Series (anyone else remember using that as a kid???) She wants to empower you with knowledge that you have what it takes to carry out God’s plan, how to live each day in contentment no matter your circumstances, the power of approaching each day prepared to praise (I LOVE this one!), and how to build a faith so strong it can withstand anything. Your soul will thank you for tuning in.

Topics Discussed

Sarah’s rocky journey from Protestantism to Catholicism and how she heard God’s call to convert (anyone considering joining the Catholic Church will resonate with this!)
Do I follow my heart or follow my dreams?
God calls us not just in spite of, but because of our inadequacies
God wants us to be happy, but what does happy really mean?
The underrated and quiet power of accompanying others
Physical beauty: how does it fit into God’s plan? How do you use it for good? How do you keep from being jealous?

Resources

Sarah’s website: Comeintotheword.com
Sarah’s book: Becoming Women of the Word
Stacey’s vocational discernment journey: Episode 8 of Called and Caffeinated
1000 Gifts by Anne Voskamp

"If God alone isn't enough, then nothing will be ever."

I don't know about you, but my 20's were HARD- and a lot of that was because of conflicting advice. I was told you don't need to take responsibility or start a family until you're 30. Others said focus on your career. I got FOMO watching my friends in their early 20's who were already married with kids and thought, "what's wrong with me? Have I missed the boat?" Insecurity, confusion, and a general feeling of starring in Hot Mess: The Musical! was my story many days.

For this episode I reached a personal goal in scoring an interview with Jackie and Bobby Angel (still doing a happy dance over here.) You may know Jackie by her maiden name Francois, a pioneer in the world of Catholic speakers. The Angels are real, raw and honest and they cut through noise with clear advice that will help any confused 20-somethings (and also teens!) move through each day with eyes on what matters and the courage to let go of the rest. The 20's are indeed not a "disposable decade" and when you focus on the right things there is no reason to fear that you'll miss something important.

Topics

How to be joyful in singlehood
Prioritizing
What are the “prerequisites” to getting married?
Marriage: what it's REALLY like
How to determine if he or she is the One
What to do when you fear that “I’ll never find anyone better”
My story about meeting my husband who was a 24-year-old jobless painter and a monastery drop-out…and how I knew almost immediately he was the right one
Handling rejection
What to do when you have no idea what to do

Resources

Pray, Decide, and Don’t Worry- Jackie and Bobby’s new book co-authored with Fr. Mike Schmitz (pre-order here!)
Bobby’s Blog Post Your 20s Are Over
Missionaries of Maximilian Kolbe- Secular Institute
Jackie’s blog The Devil Wants Us to Settle In Your Relationship
Stacey’s blog How Do My Unique Gifts Fit Into My Vocation? What If They Don't?
Greg Bottaro’s counseling services
The Practice of the Presence of God
Abandonment to Divine Providence
Soul of the Apostolate by Jean-Baptiste Chautard
The Reed of God by Caryll Houselander

“For many years I was scared to share my talents. And it led me to a life of correctness that was not Catholic…the greatest saints were not afraid to live outside of the bubble!”

Fr. Leo is as spicy as the jalapenos he cooks with, and he is serving up lots of sass and loving reality checks in this episode. One of the things I so admire about Fr. Leo, who break dances and karate chops FIVE boards in his presentations for the glory of God, is his incorporation of his many talents into his callings as a priest and a speaker. Fr. Leo has also hosted a cooking show and beat THE Bobby Flay in a cooking throw down on the Food Network! It gives me such awe of the creativity of the Holy Spirit. Are you a baker? Martial artist? Knitter? Video gamer? God can use it.

Along with opening our minds to God's creativity, Fr. Leo is answering your greatest discernment frustrations. Are you afraid of making “the wrong choice?” Unsure of whose advice to listen to? Unsure of whether your fear comes from a bad choice or the devil trying to bring you down? Feeling a lack of a clear answer from God? Unsure whether you’re following God’s will or your own will? All of these answered, and more!

Topics Discussed

Leo’s “vocation within a vocation” as a priest at the Secular Institute (he’s a priest who also lives under the vow of poverty, which diocesan priests do not.)
How our passions can be incorporated into our vocation
Why mistakes are necessary in discernment
How to ask clear questions so that you can get a clear answer from God
“Voluntas nostrae:” The will of God AND me
How to encourage your children to consider religious life

Resources

Plating Grace
Voluntas Dei Secular Institute

“I spend serious time in silent prayer every day and then I live my life. And I trust that either God is going to form my heart to desire what he desires, or he’s going to step in and stop me before I do something stupid, or he’s going to fix it afterward.”

The self-proclaimed “hobo for Christ” is here and she’s BRILLIANT and hilarious. Because of living out of her car for the last seven years, relying on the mercy of others to take her into their home, and preaching the gospel wherever possible and in whatever circumstances possible, you might think Meg Hunter-Kilmer is an easygoing, type B person who goes with the flow. But not at all. She loves spreadsheets and control and knowing what the plan is.

Do you relate? Do you struggle to achieve this nebulous thing called “balance?” Meg and I talk about how to give control up to God, what “balance” looks like in his plan for you, and what “balance” meant in the lives of some of the saints. Our hefty conversation also veered into mom guilt, how to pray, and how to put boundaries around the right things. There is so much great stuff in here and Meg will make you laugh soooo many times throughout the episode- guaranteed! Because she is a saint expert, I’ve linked to pages about the saints we discuss in the show notes so you can go get yourself an ‘edumacation’ on some lesser-known saints.

Topics Discussed

Praying: how to actually do it instead of using it as a place for airing your grievances to God
Balance according to the world vs. balance accordance to God
Filtering out what isn’t necessary
How to stop doing lots of things and accomplishing nothing
Catholic mom expectations: what to keep and what to lose
I can’t do it all, so what can I outsource?

Resources

Meg’s blog
Blessed Maria and Luigi Quoattrochi
Surrender: Your Discernment “Secret Weapon”
"Boundaries"
St. Mary of Egypt
Ven. Cornelia Connelly
Bl. Victoire Rasoamanarivo
St. Francis DeSales
St. Jerome
St. Saturnina
St. Camillus De Lellis

Today's episode is sponsored by the Carmelite Sisters of Baltimore. To see more about their life and attend one of the discernment retreats they sponsor throughout the year, please visit their website at https://www.baltimorecarmel.org/

Boundaries Updated and Expanded Edition: When to Say Yes, How to Say No To Take Control of Your Life

“I have (teenage) girls who are former gang members but who are down for some karaoke and ice cream- and they want to do it, because they’ve never had that before.”

Imagine you have been systematically abused and neglected at home, and the court system says you cannot go home. Instead, you have to live in an unfamiliar environment with strangers. Oh, and you’re also fifteen, with a teenagers’ limited life perspective and hormones like craaaazay.

What if that was your life? Unfortunately, members of our society in every town and city go through this. These emergency shelters for abused and neglected teens could be right around the block from you. My guest today, Katherine Mitchell, is on the front lines of loving these teens by working in a shelter. She says that the number one thing the young women want is to be normal. They want someone to notice them and to care about them. And they need examples of healthy relationships because those have been denied them.

Is God calling you to be that person? Maybe you’re not ready to adopt a teen (TBH, I’d be super nervous to do that...) but whether you're single, in college, married with kids, or an empty-nester, you can make a world of difference to a teen by becoming a mentor or a tutor. I am honestly shocked at how easy and accessible this form of service is where I formerly would have thought that it wasn’t for me. And honestly, the times when I have coordinated or participated in intentional service have taught me so much about myself and my relationship with Christ, that it has exponentially grown my heart and turbo-charged my discernment in other areas.

This work is another contribution to the pro-life movement, and unfortunately I don’t think most Catholics know about these suffering teenagers (I certainly didn’t until I ‘met’ Katherine on Instagram.) I encourage you to take the first steps if you this episode inspires a stirring in your heart to serve in this way. I know I’m gonna be seeking it out in my town.

Topics Discussed

What is an emergency shelter for teens?
Many ideas for how to serve teens in the foster care system, including group volunteering and hosting a parish info event
What you need to get started serving in a shelter
What to do if you feel awkward with teens
Under certain circumstances you can adopt for free (I didn’t know about this- everyone has told me that adoption is ALWAYS expensive!)

Resources

Katherine’s Instagram: @k.t.mitchell

“If our whole will is to do God’s will, then God’s will is our will. God is not here to crush my will; he’s here to vivify it. Sin shrinks it, and sin dulls it. Sin makes our souls a very dull gray, but sanctity gives it a vibrancy and color.”

I have one job. That's not true right? As a mom I have MANY MANY jobs. Everyone I know is busy as heck. The questions are overwhelming: Where do I work? Whom do I marry? Where should I move? How many kids should I have? Which religious order do I join? If you ride the overwhelm train often like I do, you wonder if you're making the best choices and #livingmybestlife.

As my dear friend Greg Sheffield (seminarian for the Diocese of Rochester) is here to discuss, it turns out God's will is extremely simple: our holiness. We have one job: to be holy. We can stop stressing about everything else. If you think that's too simplistic, you need to hear this episode.

As I rush through my days trying to check off my endless to-do list, often feeling frustrated and wondering about where I'm "supposed" to be, it's hugely reassuring that God's will is actually easy to find. Yup I said it: easy. It's as easy to know as sleeping, eating, and drinking. If you think that's too simplistic you absolutely need to hear this episode!

Topics Discussed

How to deal with frustrations and upsets
How to know God’s will in the present moment (and stop worrying about everything else)
Intuition and gut instinct: put there by God?
God’s commandments are largely about what we shouldn’t do, but he gives us the creativity to act on what we should do
Getting out of micro-managing, scrupulosity, and perfectionism

Resources

Greg's contact info: gregory.sheffield@dor.org
Lindsay Schlegel’s episode on Called and Caffeinated
Abandonment to Divine Providence by Jean-Pierre DeCoussad
“Don't Do the Things” Bible
How to Be Holy: A Festooning of Abandonment to Divine Providence by Peter Kreeft
Discernment article by Peter Kreeft
Lumen Gentium: Vatican II document on the Universal Call to Holiness

“It gives God glory to answer our prayers. So he set all this up for a purpose.”

What if you could make every decision not just well, but PERFECTLY? Well folks, it’s actually been done and cracking open scripture tells us how to do it. The Blessed Mother discerned perfectly, and when we delve into scripture with Joshua Mazrin you will love his insight on how to pray and hear God’s voice like the Blessed Mother did. And if ya love Catholic nerdiness like I do (ever heard the term "quasi-incarnatus" anyone? You're about to find out-) then kick back with a beverage and prepare to be amazed in this episode.

I’ll be honest: Praying the rosary has never been my favorite (“can we just do the Chaplet instead??”) Whether you converse daily in visions with Mary or whether you’re in the struggle like I am, this episode is chock-full of concrete, practical advice that you can act on today to help you discern. It’ll cultivate the soil of your soul for God’s word and will to take root in your life in a MAJOR way.

Topics Discussed

The point of the Josephite marriage and lifelong celibacy
Reading the Bible as a book of promises
Mary’s relationship with the Holy Spirit: closer than you know
Pray Lectio Divina like never before
Developing a relationship with the Holy Spirit
The absolute most important aspect of the spiritual life

Resources

Joshua on Instagram: jmazzy17
Joshuamazrin.com

“It’s that balance of trying to put things down and simplify and silence the world so that I can pay attention to these beautiful people in front of me.”

“Live every day as if it’s your last.” We’ve all heard this platitude, and it probably sounds stale. But what if you literally died and then got to come back? Discerning your choices now would probably be a lot simpler in light of your death. What would you do differently? What would you let go of?

My guest Melanie Pritchard quite LITERALLY died. She was dead on an operating table for 45 minutes after an embryonic embolism going into labor with her daughter. She was “deader than dead” according to the nurses and her family said their goodbyes. Melanie had spent her 20’s doing the Lord’s work by speaking at Catholic conferences around the country; then, she dedicated herself to her vocation as a wife and mother in her early 30’s. However, Melanie recognized when she came back to life that she still needed to make changes in how she discerned her priorities.

If you want to live with peace and learn how to say no, this episode is for you. If you feel like you’re running around and not accomplishing enough, this episode will help you make choices that lead you to gratitude, satisfaction, and simplicity.

Topics Discussed

How God used a t-shirt start-up to call Melanie to becoming a speaker on national stages
Saying no 80% of the time
Trusting God when things go terribly wrong
The power of prayer when things are out of our hands
Melanie's experience of Heavenly, profound peace
Taking a day-to-day inventory of where your peace is, and how to let the small stuff go

Resources

Searching for and Maintaining Peace by Fr. Jacques Philippe
The Day I Died: Finding Hope in Suffering by Melanie Pritchard

Searching for and Maintaining Peace: A Small Treatise on Peace of Heart

The Day I Died: Finding Hope in Suffering

“It’s a mix of being authentic but also sharing Jesus. If I were just trying to be what people want me to be on the internet I’d lose it! I’m never going to stop being myself.”

Social media is a brand new, evolving frontier in our world. I have real-life friendships that started on social media. I love using it to network and gain ideas and stay connected with family. However, we all know that dark side too: bullied teens taking their own lives, isolation, and comparing our messiness to everyone else's highlight reel. How do we know when social media is part of God's plan for us, and how do we know when we need to log off and walk away? Should we withdraw entirely? How do we engage with the world online but also maintain a healthy spiritual life?

Sr. Bethany Davis, a Daughter of St. Paul (aka the "media nuns,") is here to discuss this huge question. You'll love her easygoing style and relatability and also the challenge she presents to each of us to put Christ's mission first. The media nuns also have an amazing idea for influencing public figures through prayer that I'm TOTALLY stealing! I’m obsessed with vocation stories, so of course we also talk about Sr. Bethany's path as a millennial and how she made the counter-cultural choice to embrace the life of a nun.

Topics Discussed

Being a digital disciple and spiritually adopting public figures and influencers
The Daughters of St. Paul’s history and charism
Why the media nuns should be on social media, and what Sr. Bethany chooses to not share
Should we get into debates about hot-button issues on social media?

Resources

Fr. Aquinas Beale’s episode of Called and Caffeinated
Mary Lenaburg’s episode of Called and Caffeinated
Social Media: How Much and What For?

“In the end, it all comes down to one question: How well did I love in God’s name? And that’s where surrender comes in: in those little, teeny tiny, quiet yeses.”

Life is unpredictable and we often don’t choose the crosses that we carry. Sometimes the things we so desperately want to be fixed, aren’t. Surrender is the most important part of discernment, but how do we surrender when we are scared of being hurt?

Mary Lenaburg, author of Be Brave in the Scared, is here to offer empowering insight and hope. I get vulnerable about my struggles, we both cry (possibly several times!) and discuss how to begin trusting God in small ways that lead to big ways. We talk about what is waiting on the other side of suffering: peace, hope, strength, and then using your story to in turn assist others who struggle. Mary is inspirational and I know you’re going to love her!

BONUS: O God Beyond All Praising is my all-time fave hymn (it was the recessional hymn at my wedding!) and when I found out that Mary has a special connection to it as well I knew I wanted to include it in this episode.

Topics Discussed

The many ways God can speak to us
Using scripture and music in every difficult situation
Living in gratitude even during the worst days
Honesty as the key starting point for renewal
Answering God’s calls when you don’t feel confident
Letting go of expectations and seeing everything as a gift

Resources

Be Brave in the Scared
Taylor Schroll on Called and Caffeinated
Fr. Aquinas Beale on Called and Caffeinated

This episode is sponsored by Serving the Aged Lovingly Today (SALT) Mission Program with the Carmelite Sisters for the Aged and Infirm. For more information and to apply, please visit www.carmelitesisters.com/SALT-program

Be Brave in the Scared: How I Learned to Trust God during the Most Difficult Days of My Life

Show Notes

“When little things are hard, it’s not just about this moment. This is my training to be able to do a big thing later.”

Do you feel like you’re sliding through your days without enough intentionality? Do the little moments of frustration make you lose your peace and feel crazy? If you’re a parent, do you feel like your parenting style is best described as: “kind of a mess”? raises hand

If you’re a regular listener, you know that my mission on this podcast is to increase awareness of discernment not JUST as a one-time answer about vocation, but as a lifelong muscle (or skill) that we build up and work out over time. The delightfully chipper Lindsay Schlegel is with me for coffee to lay out your training plan for getting some superbly buff discernment muscles (to continue the weird analogy.) Obedience, surrender, self-initiated spiritual education, and self-reflection are easy to let slip in the day-to-day. They may sound heavy, but don’t be fooled: our lighthearted convo will leave you feeling motivated and energized. Lindsay is the author of Don’t Forget to Say Thank You. She relays life lessons from her motherhood journey that listeners in all stages of life will find relevant.

Plus, you’ll find out who the bi-locating patron saint of coffee is (uh, how are he and I not besties already?)

BONUS: Bach-Gonoud’s Ave Maria….one of my favorites, so I recorded it when I recently had an opportunity to sing it for my bishop and every priest in my diocese! Organ accompaniment by Michael Plagerman. A beautiful piece for pausing with a cup of coffee in the middle of a busy day for a prayer break. Aaaahhhhh..

Topics Discussed

How to become a better listener to God’s voice
Can and should Catholic mothers “have it all?”
Obedience to God in the small moments
A quick and effective Ignatian discernment strategy for any decision

Resources

Don’t Forget to Say Thank You
Pedro Arrupe’s poem: Fall in Love
Getting Past Perfect by Kate Wicker
One Beautiful Dream by Jennifer Fulwiler
The Ignatian Workout by Tim Muldoon
Paul Krenzelok on Ignatian Discernment Spirituality on Called and Caffeinated

This episode is sponsored by Serving the Aged Lovingly Today (SALT) Mission Program with the Carmelite Sisters for the Aged and Infirm. For more information and to apply, please visit www.carmelitesisters.com/SALT-program

Getting Past Perfect: How to Find Joy and Grace in the Messiness of Motherhood (CatholicMom.com Book)

One Beautiful Dream: The Rollicking Tale of Family Chaos, Personal Passions, and Saying Yes to Them Both

The Ignatian Workout: Daily Exercises for a Healthy Faith

Show Notes

“I was like, ‘God, I don’t want to be a priest,’ but I knew to do good discernment I had to be open to everything. I had to be open to being a priest; I had to be open to being married; I had to be open to whatever God wants for me.”

Every good Catholic boy hears from his parish priest and the Church ladies, “I think God is calling you to a priest.” Run away! Run away! Resist! There are instances in life for all of us where it may feel like God is calling us to something we don’t want to do. What do you do when you fear you’re called to something you don’t want to even consider?

The ever-droll Taylor Schroll (see what I did there?) of the Forte Catholic Podcast is a lifelong Catholic who defiantly resisted his potential calling to the priesthood for years. We discuss important aspects of discernment: moving your feet instead of waiting for absolute certainty, honesty with God (especially when you’re angry with him!), and surrendering to him before you know the answer. In Taylor’s story, he reveals how his future wife moving across the country to discern religious life actually enabled their relationship.

BONUS: at the end listen to an Ave Verum Corpus chant- simple and lovely and a great way to end the episode with a little love for Jesus.

Topics Discussed

My brilliant business strategy for Taylor that is going to make him $millions$
Can you discern multiple vocations at once?
A practical tool to discern what you really want

Resources

Forte Catholic Podcast
Taylor’s YouTube channel
You Don’t Have a Soulmate blog post

Show Notes

“He said: ‘I came so that you can have life to the full.’ He didn’t say: ‘I came so you can be stressed to the max, or I came so that you can be stretched totally thin.’”

How is a married couple called to be the person of Jesus in the world? If you’re single, do you worry that the sacrifices that come with marriage will be too hard? If you’re married, do you ever feel like you have to give too much of yourself? Does your marriage feel less joyful than you think it should? You’re going to love Dan and Amber DeMatte (I admit; I have a holy couple crush on them, myself!)

First of all, Dan and Amber share a rare distinction with me: we were all on reality TV shows about discernment! Dan was featured on God or the Girl, A&E’s 2006 docu-series about young men discerning the priesthood, in which Amber also appeared as “the girl.” So I of course asked Dan about his show the top questions that people ask me about my show, and hilarity ensues!

Then we get into the meat of discerning a vision for your marriage. Dan and Amber empower married couples (or single people discerning marriage) to follow the three evangelical counsels of poverty, chastity and obedience. It seems contradictory, but viewing your marriage as a cross is actually the secret to a holy, happy, lasting union.

Topics Discussed

Abundant life: what does that mean?
Contraception vs. Natural Family Planning- how your fertility integrates with chastity
How to make generosity with God easy
Obedience in marriage- what it is and what it isn’t
Carving out time for prayer when you have small children
Forming a family rule of life

Resources

God or the Girl on A&E
Melanie Smith’s on Called and Caffeinated
Three Secrets to Holiness in Marriage
Dave Ramsey

“I would rather not get married than marry into a bad, compromising situation just for the sake of being married because I guarantee it would be more miserable. And that’s so hard to see when you’re single!”

Do you find yourself wondering, “Is this a deal-breaker in our relationship?” Do you fear that, if you break up with your boyfriend or girlfriend, you’ll never find anyone else? Have the rose-colored glasses come off and you realize he or she is not the perfect mate you thought they were? Does it seem like your relationship and personal dreams are in conflict?

Break-ups are hard. They’re the worst, especially in a culture that glorifies the wrong vision of love. Lisa Cotter, co-author of Dating Detox and co-host of the popular How-To Catholic Podcast, is giving us a 1-2 punch of philosophical know-how and practical advice today. We discuss the intellect, will, and passions and how they interact to discern EVERY decision. Lisa illuminates how to handle chastity struggles, how to know if you’re being used or loved, and practical ways to build up and operate from God’s vision of love rather than the world’s tainted vision.

So much good stuff in here, even for an old married dame like myself ;)

Topics Discussed

Getting honest with yourself and seeing your partner honestly
Handling fear of being single
Discerning personal goals and your relationship
Projecting virtues that don’t exist and what to do when you “wake up”

Resources

Dating Detox: 40 Days of Perfecting Love in an Imperfect World
How-To Catholic Podcast
Deacon Gerard Anthony on Called and Caffeinated Podcast
Lisa's website: madetomagnify.com

Dating Detox: 40 Days of Perfecting Love in an Imperfect World

“Jesus was a deacon, and also a consecrated single person! Most people don’t think about that- talk about imitation of Christ!” dies laughing

Discovering you’re not called to a vocation you're attached to can feel like God is breaking up with you. Deacon Gerard Anthony knows- he thought he was called to marriage, then religious life, then priesthood… until he realized his calling was none of those. He is called to what I believe are the two most misunderstood calls in Catholicism: the Diaconate and Consecrated Virginity.

What are those? Are those real things? Yup. Did you know that several deacons were elevated to pope, that there was a golden age of the Diaconate in Church history, and that deacons are the arm of charity in the Body of Christ? (and, as Deacon Gerard himself says, “liturgical eye candy!”) This episode is packed full of fascinating tidbits that I, even as a lifelong Catholic, NEVER heard. We also talk about how the human need for intimacy can be fulfilled in the consecrated single life.

There was so much to cover on being a Deacon that we didn’t get to go in depth about consecrated singles…but don’t worry. I’m gonna get to that in a future episode ;)

Topics Discussed

What is a deacon?
History of the diaconate
Life and ministries as a permanent deacon
How to know if you’re called to singlehood and/or the diaconate

Links

The Deacon: Icon of Christ and Icon of Hope by Deacon Gerard Anthony

The Deacon: Icon of Christ, Icon of Hope

“Right now God is writing a masterpiece and the story is yours. The question is: will we trust him? Will we allow him to work in us?”

Do you wish you could live free of pornography, body image anxiety, or thinking of yourself as “bad?” Do you struggle to let go of habitual sins and wish you could just stop wanting the things that take you away from God? Steve Pokorny, speaker and author of Redeemed Vision: Setting the Blind Free from the Pornified Culture, uses his powerful testimony, knowledge of Theology of the Body and a scientific method (that TRULY works!) to train his clients in breaking their compulsions.

We are, first and foremost, called to be sons and daughters of God. Let’s get that straightened out so that we make healthy, God-centric decisions. In a culture where understanding of sexuality is lacking at best and horribly twisted in many cases, Steve breaks through the noise with beautiful truth and clarity. You’ll be surprised to learn how nudity in sacred art and breastfeeding in public can help redeem our culture!

Topics

The septic tank analogy: the state of our culture today
How negative talk affects you and others
How to inoculate yourself and your children from pornography
Re-training your brain to gain freedom from your anxieties and sins

Resources

Redeemed Vision: Setting the Blind Free from the Pornified Culture
Freedom Coaching
My Stroke of Insight
Maria Lactaens
Natalie Stilwell on Called and Caffeinated: Healing Your Wounded Past

“I was Catholic on Sunday, in my terms. I would ask God for things that I wanted, not what he wanted.”

Money can be a painful topic. Student debt, inheriting our family of origin’s wounds surrounding finances, and expectations vs. reality can leave us hurting and grasping for control. Stacie and John Martinez were making a good income working in the fashion industry in NYC. They had everything they wanted… until they realized they weren’t fulfilled. In their emptiness they found their fulfillment in the Catholic faith… and almost immediately the economic slump of 2008 hit them hard. With four kids and no jobs in sight, Stacie and John had to completely re-calibrate their definition of “a good life” and what they are working for.

Now, Stacie and John are the parents of six children and the owners of Proud Catholic Company (I own one of their shirts and it’s my FAVORITE shirt.) They’re sharing their journey of learning to lean on God and living happily with less.

BONUS CONTENT: Enjoy the famous Miserere Mei Deus at the end of the episode with all parts sung by me. It's a Lent-appropriate meditation with a gorgeous soaring high C!

Topics Discussed

The real value of money
Seeing God’s hand working when times are tough
Why having kids is not as expensive as people tell you
Letting God take care of you

Resources

Proud Catholic Company
Grassroots Films- The Human Experience
Grassroots Films- Child 31

This episode is sponsored by the Carmelite Sisters for the Aged and Infirm's Mission Program Serving the Aged Lovingly Today (SALT). Consider spending a week in loving service and find out more here!

This episode is sponsored by Serving the Aged Lovingly Today (SALT) Mission Program with the Carmelite Sisters for the Aged and Infirm. Check them out here and consider spending a week in loving service this summer!

“Do you want God’s answer more, or do you want God’s love? If you seek God’s love more than God’s answer, you will find them both.”

How do you know when he or she is “the one?” How do we stop comparing ourselves to our engaged and married friends? Is it shallow to make physical attraction a criteria for our future spouse? How can we forgive ourselves for our past mistakes?

Leah Darrow is that big sister we all need in our lives to tell it like it is. She’s a powerhouse speaker who dishes out TRUTH regarding issues in dating and discerning marriage that everyone needs to hear during our single years. Leah shares how to live a beautiful and fulfilled life, free of fear, no matter where we are in our discernment by keeping our eyes on what really, really matters.

Topics discussed

How to tell your significant other about the mistakes in your past
The importance of giving God time
Do’s and don’ts of approaching friends you'd like to date
Setting boundaries for chastity
Should only men pursue women or can women pursue men too?

Resources

Divine Mercy in My Soul- the Diary of St. Faustina
The Other Side of Beauty
Lux University

The Other Side of Beauty: Embracing God's Vision for Love and True Worth

Diary: Divine Mercy in My Soul

This episode is sponsored by the Carmelite Sisters for the Aged and Infirm's mission program called Serving the Aged Lovingly Today (SALT). www.carmelitesisters.com/SALT-program It's also sponsored by the Carmelite Monastery of Baltimore: https://www.baltimorecarmel.org/

“(Religious life) was the last thing I would have thought I would have been drawn to. I had all these plans. And God had other plans for me! ”

If reading the above statement made you feel an instinctive cringe because you’re afraid God might suck you in and call YOU, you must listen! Listen to Momma Stacey and just. Click. The. Button. Do you think that in religious life you will have to let go of your talents and the things that bring you joy? Are you curious about the inner workings of religious life but don’t feel ready to visit orders yet? What do the different parts of the habit signify, anyway?

Too often we say, “religious life just isn’t for me.” But do we assume that too soon without truly exploring the question? Fr. Aquinas Beale thought he needed to make it through college and find a job before he could really put his future at God’s feet. He’s a gymnast, musician, super brainy millennial, and was ambitious to make his way in the world. He thought that religious life just couldn’t be a full, happy life for him. In the midst of all his busy-ness, God was calling him to be a monk and priest with the Dominican Order. He has had challenges but has been constantly surprised by how giving his life to God has fulfilled not only his dreams, but also dreams he never knew he had. Whatever stage of discernment you’re at, you’ll love his answer to my question at the end: “is there anything you want young men and women to know?”

Topics Discussed:

What’s it’s like to live in community
The difference between being called to the priesthood or being a monk
Steps you take in discernment and in joining an order
How you get your new name
Pieces of a Dominican habit and what they symbolize

Resources

Dominican Friars' website
Dominican CDs: In Media Ecclesiae, Gaudeamus, Ave Maria, Christ Was Born to Save: Christmas with the Dominican Friars
The Hillbilly Thomists Bluegrass CD by the Dominicans
Called by God: Discernment and Preparation for Religious Life by Rachel Collins

The Hillbilly Thomists

Called by God: Discernment and Preparation for Religious Life

This episode is sponsored by the Carmelite Sisters for the Aged and Infirm's mission program, Serving the Aged Lovingly Today (SALT). Look them up here and consider giving a week in loving service!

Show Notes

Have you ever felt like your career or life choices just aren’t enough? Has following your dreams disappointed you? Are you worried your control freak or perfectionist personality will hold you back from following God’s will (but you don’t know how to quit those traits)? Do you freak out when you don’t get answers from God? I’ve been to all of those places, and in this episode I’m sharing MY journey!

I am excited (and a bit nervous) to be on the other side of the mic to tell my vocational discernment story. It’s a rollicking tale from touring with Broadway shows to being featured on reality TV, to wanting to become a nun but realizing I wasn’t called to it. With each step through the muddle and confusion I learned how my Type A personality both helped and hindered my hearing God’s voice.

God in his wisdom provides endless opportunities to “get it right” and deals with us gently. He has shown me the awesome depths of his love for me, allowing the building of a relationship of trust in which I can let go of the need to be in control. I share the bestest strategies I know of how to get started discerning, how to know what your vocational calling is, how to sort through your levels of desire to find the deepest ones, and a heavy dose of empathy for all those who daily ask “what am I doing with my life?!?”

Topics Discussed

What to do when you are restless and hungry for “something more”
Peace as the guidepost and goal
Why everyone should discern religious life
Unexpected ways God may speak to us
Calls to surrender, relationship and peace

Resources

The Ear of the Heart- Dolores Hart
Little Sisters of the Poor
Daughters of St. Mary of Providence
The Sisterhood: Becoming Nuns (available on YouTube, Amazon Prime and iTunes)
Reasons to NOT Discern
Surrender: Your Discernment “Secret Weapon”
Carmelite Sisters for the Aged and Infirm

“God is the ultimate creator and we should be like him in our creativity. Look at the gifts you have. Produce the best you can for Jesus.”

If you’re a Catholic creative who suffers from creative block or the soul-crushing belief that “it’s all been done before,” this episode is for you. How do we discern our creative call, create free from self-doubt, AND use it to help redeem our culture?

First, we can’t waste time with self-doubt when the Gospel needs to be shared.

Second, it’s been freeing to realize that my art isn’t all about me. It’s a service for others. It brings people to God. Your artistry isn’t about ratings or garnering a huge following; it’s about being a channel to God in a way that no one else on Earth can.

My guest today, Joe Melendrez, has been performing as a Catholic rap artist since he was 15. He encountered raised eyebrows from Catholics who associate rap with an immoral culture. He’s such a great example of how to redeem an art form that’s all-too-often used for evil. Currently Joe is one of the most well-known speakers and Catholic performers in the US of A. We also talk about branding, feeding yourself spiritually, and discerning your vocation.

Y'all, the world needs our Spirit-led creativity. You’re not too old, or too young, or too poor, or too anything to start using your gifts right now. I just encourage you to surrender yourself totally to him and to ask him to flow through you.

Topics discussed:

Collaboration and creating content consistently
Developing a relationship with the Holy Spirit
Articulating your creative mission and forming goals
Branding and knowing the audience you’re serving
Transforming your art into a ministry

Resources:

Fr. Rob Galea Ministry
Joe Melendrez (check out his new album, Chosen)
Scripture Observation Application Prayer (SOAP Method)
Marie Forleo
God Swagg Apparel
Gotta Get it Now Song

“This is not a sin or something wrong with me; this is my call.”

Why do Catholics have a tendency to judge each others’ family size? What does the Church say (and not say) about the “right” number of children for a Catholic family? Does being “open to life” mean that married couples should always try to conceive a child? What about emotional well-being: is that a good enough reason to delay a pregnancy or would it be selfish? In this episode I discuss some of the ins and outs of discerning God’s plan with my friend Melanie Smith. I hope we can help de-mystify this subject for anyone who is married or who wants to be married. Ultimately, it’s essential to remember that God’s opinion is the only one that matters.

Discerning family size is highly personal, so I thought the best way to approach it would be from my own particular angle (vulnerability alert!) Melanie is an amazing model of how to be a compassionate friend as well as a wealth of resources to approach parenthood with both generosity and prudence :)

Melanie is also an incredible community builder, so we get into some specifics on how to start a young adult group in your area. Community is HUGE in discerning call and in enriching our experience of life so enjoy this bonus content!

Topics Discussed

Postpartum depression and emotional health
The joys and difficulties of NFP
Just reasons for avoiding pregnancy
Trusting God with your fertility
Getting rid of preconceived notions of how many children you “should” have
What the Church says and doesn’t say about how many children to have
How to start a young adult small group in your area

Resources

naturalwomanhood.org
NaPro Technology
Fulton Sheen- Three to Get Married
Dan and Amber DeMatte- Three Secrets to Holiness in Marriage
Catechism of the Catholic Church 2368- reasons to space children
Flourish in Hope Blog
Theology of the Body Institute- Head and Heart Immersion Course
Walking With Purpose
Melanie’s email: melanie.yonushonis@gmail.com
The Sisters of Life Retreat House

“It’s hard to unlearn some of the messages that you internalize about yourself growing up. There was a little cancer planted in my mind and heart that played out in my life in different ways.”

New Year’s is a time when many of us adopt the motivational motto “new year, new you.” However, sometimes that motivation to recreate ourselves can come from a wounded concept of our true identity as children of God. I mean, guys- we are made in his image. Do we really realize that?

If you’re plagued by self-loathing and wishing you were someone else, or if you’re living in habitual sin that you can’t seem to escape, or if you love someone who is dealing with these issues, I am so happy to share this episode with you.

We don't discern anything in a vacuum; our past choices and wounds follow us into our present and can cloud our ability to discern well. My guest today, Natalie Stilwell, has so much to offer on this topic. A few years ago she was in a place of despondence: “I was living this double life and I don’t even want to but I feel completely broken and helpless because of my circumstances, and I don’t know how to be strong in my identity and in what I want and in what God wants for me.” Her words hit me in the gut because I also made poor choices for years that came out of a wounded concept of identity.

I’ve been speaking about discernment and our identity as God’s children as my two main topics for several years, but it’s only this year that I’ve realized the connection between the two. Knowledge of our identity as children of God is the basis for all right discernment. We have to have a secure, trusting relationship with God in order to abandon our future to him.

New year, still lovable you.

Topics Discussed

Un-learning the lies about our identity and finding the love we want
Gratitude for time and what we have
Treating yourself with love and taking steps out of habitual sin
Re-writing the wounded scripts that you live out of
Listening to others in a Christlike way who have past wounds
Accompanying those in habitual sin

Resources

Augustine- The Confessions
Karl Keating- Catholicism and Fundamentalism
So Goes the Future
Natalie's Truth and Gender Series

“The call of God will never lead you where his grace cannot keep you.”

I’ve heard a looooot of objections from young people about why they can’t possibly be called to religious life. “I couldn’t pray all day.” “I couldn’t give up my family.” “I wouldn’t be suited to taking vows of poverty, chastity and obedience.” “I wouldn’t be able to do the things I love as a nun.” Even: “Nuns are cranky and unhappy people.”

These myths couldn’t be farther from the truth! If you’re not quite ready to visit a convent/monastery but want to dip a figurative toe in the pool of discerning religious life, then I’m excited to introduce you to Sr. Peter Lillian DiMaria and Sr. Mary Donovan. If you’re not discerning religious life but want to know more about the Carmelite charism (and what a charism is,) then this episode is for you too. The Sisters are my co-workers, friends and spiritual benefactors (in case ya don’t know, I work for the Carmelite Sisters for the Aged and Infirm coordinating mission programs and providing education dementia in their nursing homes.) They are fun, relatable, and live fulfilling, authentic lives. I just loved chatting with them about how they knew they were called to religious life, Carmelite spirituality, and how God has used their gifts within that vocation.

Tune in to hear more about Carmelite spirituality, the type of man Sr. Peter thought she would marry, and a lot of other nuggets!

Topics discussed:

God uses your gifts in your vocation, even when you don’t see how he could
Saying yes to our vocation is lifelong, not a one-time yes
The process of becoming a nun
How to pray all the time (even when you don’t think you can!)
Carmelite spirituality and how it is lived out
We are all called to be life-givers regardless of what our callings are

Resources

Serving the Aged Lovingly Today (SALT) Mission Program
Carmelite Sisters for the Aged and Infirm

When I was discerning my vocation, I remember getting frustrated when I would hear about all this pie in the sky philosophy without getting any answers about how to actually know God’s will and make a decision. I wish I had heard Paul Krenzelok speak then. Enter today’s episode, the perfect marriage of philosophy and practicality! No matter what decision you’re discerning or what stage you’re at, Paul’s episode will give you new insight and effective tools you can use right now.

Hopefully you know that you are inherently important, but I think sometimes we kind of gloss over it when we feel small, disorganized, less than what we should be, or just a hot mess in general. I often compare my journey to others’ and forget my unique unrepeatability. Did you know that understanding our dignity, individuality, and identity is the basis of all right discernment? Paul really digs into a truth that we often lose sight of: we need to focus on who we become rather than on what we do. As long as we own our true identity as children of God, the “what” will take care of itself much more easily.

Paul also pulls from St. Ignatius of Loyola’s discernment spirituality to give us real, actionable tools that you can use today. If you’ve never heard of consolation and desolation and how they help us get in touch with our deepest desires, you’re going to love this.

Topics discussed:

Focusing on discerning Who (identity) rather than What (vocation/career)
Ignatius of Loyola’s spirituality
Our deepest desires are God's will for us
Consolation and desolation as tools for discernment

Resources:

Franciscan Friars of the Atonement
Reasons not to discern religious life
Ascension press- Who Are You?
Christopher West- Theology of the Body Institute
Listening to the Music of the Spirit: The Art of Discernment
Catholics on Call: Discerning a Life of Service in the Church
Called By God: Discernment and Preparation for Religious Life
Ignatianspirituality.com

I remember being so frustrated by the question “What’s THE right choice?” when I was discerning. It’s so easy to think that somewhere there’s an answer sheet that God will show me eventually if I try hard enough. Now I know that that’s looking at discernment entirely the wrong way. I am so excited to share this episode filled with truth bombs with you! I spent 40 straight minutes nodding at everything my guest Mike Creavey said. I wish this episode had been around when I was discerning religious life, but I’m so glad I got to chat with Mike now and take what he said into my own future discernment. I think you’ll find it useful too, no matter what choice you’re wresting with.

Mike is one of my most well-read and articulate friends, and he has some truly incredible insight into the “bigger picture” of what we’re getting at when we discern any decision. He came up with a new analogy I had never thought of, and it’s one I want to bring to prayer and keep with me throughout my life for all my decisions. We also discussed what it feels like to hear God speak to you and how realizing our lives belong to someone else changes every waking moment.

Mike discerned religious life through college and spent a year in the seminary before ultimately choosing marriage and fatherhood. He holds a Master’s Degree in Theology from Franciscan University (aka he really knows what he’s talking about,) and is the host of the Gracious Guest podcast.

Topics discussed:

Growing from renting our parents’ faith to purchasing our own, and what it costs
Why there isn’t an “answer key” somewhere when it comes to discernment
Receptivity as the best way to hearing God speak
How discernment is like never-ending spiritual land navigation
Our lives are not our own (and why it’s so hard to embrace that)

Resources:

The Gracious Guest Podcast and Blog
Cardinal Sarah’s The Power of Silence
Romano Guardini's The Spirit of the Liturgy (Milestones in Catholic Theology)
Thomas Merton’s discernment prayer
Jean Pierre de Coussade's Abandonment to Divine Providence

“The silence is deafening.”

Seeing as he’s the most important person in the world to me, I bribed my hubby with a butter toffee steamer into being my first ever podcast guest!

How do you know what to do when you’re waiting for God to tell you and only hear silence? John’s discernment lasted six years as he sought his vocation. He visited multiple monasteries including the only Carthusian monastery in North America. This is his story before we met…our story of dating and marriage will have to wait for a future episode.

Topics discussed:

What discernment means and why ALL Christians should ALWAYS be discerning
Carthusian spirituality and daily life
Why God doesn’t waste time
The importance of persistence when you’re unsure of God’s will
“The grass ain’t greener anywhere” when it comes to vocation
The deep peace of living God’s will
How to let go of comparison when it feels like everyone else knows what they’re doing

Links:

The Confessions of St. Augustine
An Infinity of Little Hours
Into Great Silence
The Divine Office- Liturgy of the Hours

An Infinity of Little Hours: Five Young Men and Their Trial of Faith in the Western World's Most Austere Monastic Order