Lessons learned from a life of enquiry. Hosted by Mikey Ellis, each episode features insights into human behaviour and why we do what we do. These are conversations for the curious, for people who want to create a more compassionate, more inclusive and more conscious future.
I’ve been following Shy’s work for years now. I think the work he’s doing to bring greater self awareness to teaching, learning and education is essential, it’s so important.
Shy has plenty of experience in the education sector having been a high school teacher of psychology, science and maths and is now a sought after education consultant and researcher working as an Assistant Professor of Learning Sciences (Design & Pedagogy) in the Faculty of Education, University of Canberra.
He has two Bachelors degrees, two Masters degrees and a PhD so he knows a thing or two about learning. His PhD thesis was on, 'Sustainable school improvement: enhancing school middle leaders in epistemic cognition for teaching about self regulated learning'.As you'll notice from this conversation, not only is Shy's knowledge of how we learn extensive, but he has a unique ability to make complex topics as approachable and relatable as he is.
In this conversation we discuss:
To learn more about Shy's work, visit his website here.
Follow him on social media here on Instagram, here on Twitter.
Watch his 2023 TED Talk, 'What we fail to learn in schools'.
Listen to his podcast, 'Educate to Self-Regulate' here.
In this episode I speak with Dr Arne Rubinstein - author of 'The Making of Men' and CEO of the Rites of Passage Institute. We begin with the current state of masculinity in Australia and Arne's honest and cautionary assessment of it.
We discuss the desperate need for healthy masculinity and the role rites of passage experiences play in this. Arne has over 30 years of experience doing this work which is arguably more important and necessary now that it has ever been.
Arne shares insights on what we can do to support boys and men in cultivating more healthy expressions of masculinity, the role of parents and schools and what we can do as as individuals to create a culture that supports young people in identifying their gifts and sharing them in service of the community.
For more information on the Rites of Passage Institute - visit the website here.
You'll find a number of courses and workshops including father and daughter camps, mother and son camps, a camp for all young warriors, rites of passage facilitator training, resources and training for schools and online courses.
You can find Arne's book, 'The Making of Men' here.
Follow on social media here:
Instagram
Facebook
TikTok
When I met Tarang earlier this year and listened to him speak as a panellist at an event, I knew there was so much more I wanted to hear from him. We got the chance to find some time amongst Tarang's busy schedule to chat and I'm glad we did.
We discussed some difficult issues, important issues. Issues such as gender based family and domestic violence, mental health, masculinities and the desperate need for positive role models for boys and young men.
Tarang's invitation for us all to be advocates for these issues is a compelling and inspiring call to action. I hope you enjoy this conversation as much as I did.
You can find out more about Tarang and his work and how to contact him below.
Website
Tarang's Instagram
Not One More Niki Instagram
Email: tarang@tarangchawla.com
Hi,
I need to have conversations like this, albeit with you via a podcast. It helps. I hope it helps you, too.
I mentioned some quotes from John O'Donohue in this episode, you can listen to the full conversation here with Krista Tipppet, it's pure magic - The Inner Landscape of Beauty.
And you can find out more about Tara Brach and RAIN here.
With love,
Mikey
Hi,
What a time hey. I don't know about you but I feel like it's time to do things differently, very differently. This next 'season' of A Satisfied Mind podcast will both exploring how we might do this and documenting my experience.
In this episode I share an update and an invitation to join me.
I also mention some words I wrote back in 2020 about going 'back to work'.
And there's this interview with Daniel Schmachtenberger which will blow your mind in the realest way.
Like, subscribe, do the things you do when you love a podcast.
Much gratitude and love,
Mikey
And join us in the next Men's Circle if you read this and are not to late to register - we begin October 17th.
Pete is an accomplished photographer who has travelled the world shooting and working with people like the Obamas and Simon Sinek. He's now travelling less and created a community of soulful entrepreneurs who are changing lives.
Through his bespoke programs and intuitive gift for identifying and coaxing out the essence of people he works with, he's teaching others how to create content that matters.
In this conversation we talk about this work and his creative process. We talk about magnets and mosquitos, creating before you consume and what authenticity actually means.
This conversation is full of truth bombs, soulful insights and plenty of tools and tips for you to make more meaningful content, no matter what context.
For more information on all Pete's offerings check out his website here
To join The Playground click here
The Create Content That Matters program
Show notes seem a bit pointless after what might the the longest podcast title! Here's the downlow on this episode.
I finished walking the Camino de Santiago and experienced the come down, the anticlimax was real. I then had a few friends reach out and the conversations that ensued were extremely impactful. I wrote an article about what happens after the hero's journey and wast sitting here wondering how to tie it all together.
This podcast is my attempt to do that, I hope it translates.
I also share my intention to create a space for men to more of this – sharing in community. Details are at the end of the episode and a link to register your interest is below.
After the Hero's Journey Blog Post
Register for the May intake of Integrate- A Five Week Self-Leadership Course for Men.
Today I walked up to the highest point on the Camino de Santiago. There's a cross there atop a mound of stones that pilgrims have left behind.
These are both literal and figurative symbols of that which they've been carrying and no longer want to carry.
On the other side of this peak I stepped off the trail and sat on some grass to record this episode in the sunshine whilst thinking about letting go and why it's so hard.
I reference David Whyte's poem, Faces at Braga. You can read it here.
I met Polina as I wandered into the grounds of an Albergue one very cold morning looking for a coffee whilst walking the Camino de Santiago. There was a sign they had put out on the Camino just the day before saying, 'warm up' with an arrow pointing away from the path. I followed it and found myself at Alberuge Amanecer.
There I had a coffee and some fresh banana bread but it was the conversation with Polina that really moved me. Polina is 26 years of age and with her parents, recently fled their home in Mariupol, Ukraine. They have come to Spain and the Camino seeking refuge and to work, to build a new home and establish a new community.
I was deeply moved by talking with Polina and asked her if I could share her story. This conversation is some of it.
Link to the Facebook group mentinoed - TBC
Alberuge Amanecer is where Polina and her family work, please support them if you find yourself on the Camino.
This was an impromptu episode. I was walking in between Hontillas de Camino and Castrojeriz on the Camino de Santiato and pulled over to share some thoughts. Perhaps it was the fact I had been walking all day with only my thoughts to keep me company that had me inspired to share, I was craving conversation!
I hope, despite the wind and poor recording conditions, that you enjoy this episode. It's very low-fi but talking about some hi-fidelity feels.
The podcast interview with Francis Weller I mentioned is here
And you can find more of Francis' work here
This conversation with Rainier Wylde is great example of why I created this podcast.
To learn from people and their lived experience. To provide an opportunity for others to share their stories. To connect more deeply with people at a time when slow, intentional, consciously nurtured connections are replaced by desperate dopamine benders and superficial scrolling frenzies.
To learn to listen better. To practice asking better questions.
To share the wisdom and perspective of others who are generous enough to share their lives, their lessons and their own questions with me.
Rainier has plenty to share and does so with a poetic meter informed by a life of well lived experiences.
We dive straight into it as Rainier shares his experience of grieving the recent loss of his father. In his signature storytelling style, Rainier shares stories of key moments - both big and small, all profound, key moments that have changed his life and helped him connect to a greater sense of appreciation and awe for it all, especially the seemingly insignificant moments.
Here's some of what we cover:
It's an inspiring conversation - it's raw, honest and heartfelt.
For more information on Rainier and how to access more of his work:
Rainer Wylde on Instagram
Into the Wylde on Substack
Work with Rainier
Thanks for listening.
Michael
You can feel the power of Mariam's presence through this conversation, and it's a beautiful thing.
Mariam arrived in Melbourne from her Somali homeland as a refugee in 1998 with her husband, four children and a fifth on the way. Her story begins well before this however and we explore some pivotal stories, memories and lessons learned from this time.
Having settled in Brighton, Melbourne, Mariam cofounded RAW-Resilient Aspiring Women in 2012, a not-for-profit organisation focused on building community and social spaces for women to connect in.
She launched her autobiography, A Resilient Life, in 2012, and continued to share her experience and commitment to improving refugee's lives by sitting on the board of Asylum Seekers Resource Centre, serving as an ambassador for Refugee Council of Australia and a Director at Family Peace.
Mariam continues to share her experience and commitment to improving refugee’s lives by sitting on the board of Asylum Seekers Resource Centre, serving as an ambassador for Refugee Council of Australia and a Director at Family Peace.
She is an International Women’s Forum member and co-founder of Space2b, an art and design based social enterprise established to support asylum seekers, refugees and newly arrived migrants.
She was recently awarded the Ambassador of Peace award from the Universal Peace Federation – in recognition of her on-going work promoting social cohesion amongst Melbourne’s culturally diverse population. She is regularly invited to speak to different community groups and featured in national Australian TV, radio and press.
We conver so much ground in this conversation and we go deep early. We discuss:
I hope you enjoy this conversation as much as I did, my heart was full and I hope you feel the warmth and presence this conversation generated.
For more information and to follow Mariam's work:
Website: www.mariamissa.com.au
Instagram: @mariamissaofficial
To subscribe to A Satisfied Mind Journal and read previous entries, check it out here.
Thanks for listening,
Michael
I head Lael Stone speak recently at an event about a school she founded, Woodline Primary, which focusses on a holistic and heart-lead approach to education. This is just one of the many ways in which Lael is changing the way we give raise and educate children from pre-natal to adolescence.
Leal created the ‘About Birth’ program after working with thousand of parents, children, families and identifying the need for a more connected and empathetic approach to assisting mothers and babies who had experienced trauma. About Birth has become Australia’s leading online childbirth program.
She’s been a Calmbirth practitioner, postnatal trauma counsellor, and Aware Parenting instructor. As her own children grew up she developed a sex education curriculum for secondary schools and has delivered a Ted Talk on How to Raise Emotionally Intelligent Children'.
She’s a podcast host of the very popular and successful ‘The Aware Parenting’ podcast with co host. Marion Rose and has just written a best selling book called ‘Raising Resilient and Compassionate Children’.
Oh, and as previously mentioned she’s founded a school - Woodline Primary that is revolutionising education by fostering connection and awareness through supporting and nurturing the whole child.
In this episode we talk about all the above and focus on:
Lael Stone's Website
The Aware Parenting podcast
Raising Resilient and Compassionate Children book
Woodline Primary School
Subscribe to A Satisfied Mind newsletter
Thanks for listening,
Michael
Shadow work.
You may be familiar with it, you may have done some, perhaps you're well acquainted with your shadow. Maybe you have no idea what this all means but have heard people talking about it.
It's work what has fascinated, compelled and challenged me for most of my life and specifically the past couple of years working with Kerrie.
For context, her bio is a compelling introduction to this work and the topic of this conversation:
"Kerrie works at the crossroads of vision, creativity and imagination as an author, tarot reader, shadow guide and practicing witch. Her first book Morsel was released in early 2022 after a decade of writing online. Making her home on the wild east coast of Australia Kerrie works worldwide online, guided by the moon and stars above and earth below, intentionally creating safe curated spaces for you to connect to your path and power, your soul self and your innate guidance.
With a decades old background in natural and alternative therapies, plant and magical lore and a deep commitment to ongoing learning, Kerrie is passionate about reflecting your innate wisdom back to you in myriad forms."
In this episode we discuss:
It's a deep dive into places we tend to avoid, but are ultimately so liberating and rewarding. I hope you enjoy this conversation and if you'd prefer to watch, I've uploaded it onto YouTube here.
For more information on Kerrie's work, check out her website.
You can buy her book, Morsel, here.
Follow her in Instagram here.
Please like, share, rate and subscribe to this podcast and newsletter. Your support, comments and feedback are appreciated.
Cheers,
Michael
Since it was founded in 2008, the social enterprise Thankyou has raised over $17.5 million dollars for its impact partners on a mission to eradicate extreme poverty. Thankyou has always done things differently, taken risks and creatively disrupted systems that need to change and it's been quite the rollercoaster.
From their original campaign to sell bottled water to fund life-changing water projects in developing nations, to abandoning that campaign (you can read about why below), Thankyou has been quick to adapt and has never shied away from setting audacious goals.
There was the cheeky marketing campaign that leveraged the support of customers and community to encourage Coles and Woolies to stock Thankyou (it worked), to the most recent campaign to leverage the reach and power of the biggest product companies in the world to partner with Thankyou and redistribute profits to impact partners (a work in progress - check out the 'no small plan' link below)
Oh, and there was the best-selling, groundbreaking book 'Chapter One' that documents it all, albeit in a typically unconventional way.
It's been a fascinating journey and I've always been fascinated by the people who make this kind of big, systemic change happen. In this case, its Daniel Flynn.
In this episode we talk about the challenges of running a purpose driven social enterprise during a time of rampant capitalism, during a pandemic whilst up against the might and power and control of global multinationals.
And, we talk about the personal challenges that Daniel experiences as he grows as a human, a husband, a father and a leader.
I hope you enjoy this conversation as much as I did.
Michael
Thankyou website
The 7-Eleven campaign
The Coles & Woolworths campaign
Chapter One book
Why Thankyou is no longer selling bottled water
No Small Plan campaign
To subscribe to the Satisfied Mind newsletter - join us here.
Self awareness in leadership. It's a hot topic that deserves far more attention than it gets. There's plenty of books on both, but too few on how to combine and apply both in practice.
Cassandra Goodman's new book, 'Being True - How to Be Yourself at Work' does just that, and it is brilliant. Not only does it provide a compelling call to action for why this work is essential now, it provides clear principles and practices to make this a very handy guide for transforming the way you lead and live your life.
Cassie uses the IFS framework and applies it to leadership. It's a beautiful marriage and one that cuts through all the jargon and platitudes of leadership while providing a clear and concise guide for practice.
I loved this book and was so excited to dig into it with Cassie in this conversation. I hope you enjoy this conversation as much as I did and I know you're going to learn plenty.
For more information and links mentioned in this episode:
The Centre for Self Fidelity
Buy the book here - Being True
Richard Schwartz - 'Greater Than the Sum of Our Parts'
In this episode I talk with director, Genevieve Bailey about the power of storytelling. We talk specifically about the stories we tell about men, mental health, masculinity and diversity. This conversation was inspired by her film, Happy Sad Man.
Happy Sad Man is a beautiful documentary and it's an important one. With deft sensitivity it features the stories of five men who each have various experiences of living with mental health challenges.
I hope you enjoy this conversation and I hope it's a catalyst for more meaningful conversations for you and the people you love.
If you'd like to join us for a special screening of Happy Sad Man in Melbourne on the 8th December, DM me directly on Instagram or click here.
For screenings around the country happening now, click here.
For the Happy Sad Man trailer and website, click here.
Thanks for listening,
Michael
Hi,
Just dipping my toes back in, I feel a bit nervous putting out a new episode after a break. This one is just shaking off the cobwebs.
Links mentioned:
Happy Sad Man Film
The Mancave
Ben Bohmer set from a hot air balloon in Cappadocia
Thanks for listening,
Michael
Recently, I have posted a number of articles and podcasts that reference the work of others. In doing so, I have not appropriately acknowledged the source of the content nor the people who created the work I referenced. I have passed this work off as my own, when it is not. I have shared work, concepts, processes, ideas and intellectual property that are not mine to share.
This is plagiarism and in breach of both copyright and explicit agreements made. My ignorance is no excuse, I commit to remedying this and ensuring that everything I share is done so with permission and appropriate referencing. To those whose work I have misappropriated and to everyone I have mislead, I am deeply sorry.
I have been learning more about my role in perpetuating an individualistic, capitalist, patriarchal ideology and paradigm.
I commit to learning more and doing better when it comes to understanding and dismantling this destructive system through what I write and share and through my work and actions in general.
Thank you for listening,
Michael
If you like this podcast you're going to love our newsletter. Come and join this growing community – it's full of inspiration, resources and good vibes for you at the end of the week.
Get your weekly good news here.
This conversation is a sensitive and vulnerable one. On the day I write this intro and publish this episode, my family gathers to remember the one year anniversary of my nephew David's passing. I've had a number of conversations with my sister Sharyn about his passing and her experience over the past 12 months. Each time I've been humbled and inspired by her strength and courage in the face of unimaginable grief.
I asked if she would be willing to share some of her experience with me, with us, on this podcast as I think these difficult conversations are the most important. What you'll find here is an insight into her experience of loss and grief, of processing and meaning making, of celebrating life and honouring David's legacy. It's a really powerful conversation and I'm grateful to have been able to have it and share it with you here.
If the content of this episode brings up issues for you and you need support or you know someone who does, please access help via the links below. I hope that sharing this story will help us all learn to be more mindful of and present to the privilege of living a life, and to be able to have the difficult conversations about loss and grief when we need to.
With love,
Mikey
Lifeline - 13 11 14
Beyond Blue - anxiety, depression and suicide prevention
Black Dog Institute - mental health support and suicide prevention
A big topic, an important one. Consider this a conversation starter – how can we men take greater responsibility for our emotional awareness and development and how can we support each other in doing so.
I provide more context as to why this is an urgent conversation in the episode, as well as addressing some definitions.
I suggest five considerations when approaching this work:
Below are links to teachers referenced in the episode.
I hope this is of value. Have a listen, share it with someone you think needs to hear it and let's do this important and hard work together, with love.
Mikey
Kerrie Basha - shadow work
Laurita Gorman - somatic work and nervous system regulation
Francis Weller - grief, shadow and initiation
Mark Groves - relationships
Sarah Baldwin - nervous system regulation, attachment theory and relationships
Bill Plotkin - soul initiation
Richard Schwartz - Internal Family Systems (IFS)
If you like this podcast you're going to love our newsletter. Come and join this growing community – it's full of inspiration, resources and good vibes for you at the end of the week.
Get your weekly good news here.
This where the magic happens, this is how self love happens – Self Leadership.
For more on this and the IFS model, including guided meditations, check out these resources:
No Bad Parts - Richard Schwartz
Greater Than the Sum of Our Parts - Richard Schwartz
With love,
Mikey
This episode is for anyone who feels like they're losing the plot, at war with themselves, fighting a raging inner critic or shame monster or your very own personal Voldemort.
I believe the only way to love - to love yourself and others, truly, is to first reconcile the parts of you that are not aligned with love.
If you have parts that feel like they're in conflict with each other or even with you, if you're doing a number on yourself, you're self destructive or self loathing, I got you.
You're not broken.
Coming home to cultivate a safe space within for alignment might feel like it's the hardest thing you'll ever do, but this compassion for self is the most important work we'll do.
That is, if we are to love and be loved and to truly live a full-spectrum life.
It's worth it. Fuck, what else are you going to do with this life and how's that working out for you?
Here's to embracing it all.
I had the privilege of attending a funeral recently. I consider it a privilege, for it was an opportunity to witness a most vulnerable and intimate and heartfelt sharing of love and the acknowledgment of legacy of a much loved man's life. Of course there's the grief of loss, but there is beauty in that too, there is beauty in the entire human experience and the expression of it.
If nothing else, it was a reminder of just how true that Maya Angelou quote is, it's my favourite, "that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel."
May we continue to live lives worth telling great stories about – stories of love and generosity and adventure and meaningful contribution to something other than ourselves.
If you've ever felt conflicted or torn between different parts of you that seem at odds with each other. If you've ever acted 'out of character' and were shocked by what came over you, wondering what happened. If you've ever acted irrationally in situations that didn't warrant it, or been triggered by otherwise innocuous circumstances or people.
If you've ever felt like there's an angel on one should and a devil on the other, or wondered whether there is something wrong with you because you have what seems like multiple personalities all fighting for attention.
You're not alone. Welcome to being a human. And welcome to getting to know yourself, your whole self and all your parts.
The good news is, there is nothing wrong with you.
Internal Family Systems is a paradigm for understanding our mind, ourselves and why we do what we do. I've studied psychology, philosophy, therapy, theories of self, spirituality, humans and human behaviour for most of my life, searching for answers to why we do what we do.
IFS is where the penny dropped and changed my life.
In this episode I provide an introduction to the model and a summary of key understandings. I hope it's as helpful and liberating for you as it has been for me.
For more info and resources:
Richard Schwartz and the IFS Institute - with plenty of resources and courses
No Bad Parts by Richard Schwartz - his latest book
Greater Than the Sum of Our Parts - audiobook with guided meditations if you want to experience the model more, this is brilliant
On a daily basis I witness people catching themselves feeling and trying desperately to control themselves.
Most of my life I've wondered why it's so hard to feel and express emotions. I've wondered why we don't do it more, why it feels so terrifying, why so many avoid it especially around others, why it's not modelled for us, why we're not taught it at school, at work, everywhere.
Such a fundamental human experience - to feel. And so many don't know how to.
In this episode I look at why that might be the case, what it's costing us as individuals and as a society, and how we can address this.
I reference Marc Brackett's wonderful book, 'Permission to Feel' and his RULER methodology. It's brilliant - check it out here. And if you want to improve your ability to recognise and label feelings, the mood meter app is a great resource.
Here's to normalising feeling, and the healthy expression and regulation of our emotions.
With Love,
Michael
Hi,
Welcome back. It's good to be back.
February is the new New Year, January felt a bit like a false start. As much as we want to kick off the new calendar year all frothy and full of hope and goals and dreams, that wasn't how it was for me and many others.
There was still some reckoning to be done. It was necessary, integration time is essential and too often overlooked in the pursuit of the next thing, avoiding what needs to be acknowledged.
That's what this next seasons is about - acknowledging the stuff we tend to shy away from.
We're going there. Join me.
With love.
Michael
I started this podcast in March 2020 and have done 85 episodes since. It's been one helluva ride and in this episode I reflect on the conversations, the learning, the transformation that has been our shared experience.
I wanted to keep it short but there was a lot to cover. It gets real. There is negroni so there are tears and so much appreciation, for it all.
To listen to the wisdom of Francis Weller I suggest this conversation with Mark Groves.
And for an introduction to the IFS (Internal Family Systems) therapy model, check out this conversation with founder of the model Richard Schwartz on the Sounds True podcast.
Thank you for listening.
With love,
Michael
I recorded this episode directly into my phone in the middle of a beautiful forest in the Luxulyan Valley in Cornwall. There was no mic so the sound might be a bit dodgy.
I had just written some words in my journal and felt like it was time to share an update.
For more words please visit my newsletter here.
I hope this finds you well.
Michael
Show notes and links to places I recommended:
Mt Morris House, New York
Cornhill Farm Cottages - Cornwall
Luxulyan Valley
St Eia - for food and wine in St Ives
Back to the Future - The Musical
In this episode I share a few of the things that matter most at the moment.
Things like:
I talk about jellyfish, 250 year old tress, sardines and swimming with starfish.
For show notes and links to all the things I mentioned that you might want to follow up on, go to the newsletter here.
For shortcut to those links, here you go:
Angus and Julia Stone's new album
Spotify's new 'blend' feature
Ricky Gervais and Sam Harris' podcast 'Absolutely Mental'
Iron John
Permission to Feel
How to be More Loving by TSOL
My Octopus Teacher
Your weekly dose of inspiration, education, links and resources is here!
In this episode I share:
For links to all the resources mentioned in this podcast go to the newsletter - you'll find all them and more here.
Lotsa love,
Mikey
In March 2020 I was 45, unemployed, single and living alone. I needed to make some changes and I felt like this was an opportunity to do it. I decided to let go and allow the Universe to dish up whatever lessons I needed to learn and committed to face them and see it through, no turning back.
And so I got my arse kicked.
I chose to feel through my fears and take 100% responsibility for my life. I learned a lot and still am a work in progress, whole and incomplete.
In this episode I share a few things that have helped me through. It's been messy, It's been the hardest thing I've done and it's also been the most profound experience.
I hope what I share here might help you. It will be an episode I go back to regularly to remind myself to stay in it.
Wishing you lots of love and forgiveness on your journey,
Mikey
This is the most important work we can be doing right now, the work to 'recognise your patterns, heal from your past and create your self'.
Author Dr Nicole LePera is the @the.holistic.psychologist on Instagram, you may be one of her 4.2 million followers and have seen her work. She's a great communicator and has an ability to take extremely complex human experiences like trauma and conditioning and not only explain them clearly, but in a way that empowers you to take responsibility for doing the work to heal your self.
In this episode I read highlights from the book and share some of my own commentary. I've included those highlights in a written summary over on Notion, that is free for you to access here if you'd like a copy.
You can find out more about the book and buy it here.
Dr LePera has a great youtube channel with plenty of helpful lessons here.
You can watch the video series where she discusses each chapter of the book here.
Follow her on Instagram here @the.holistic.psychologist
In this episode I talk about:
There are links galore, there's heaps of wise and inspiring quotes and a transcript from a most lovely conversation I had with a customer service agent online.
There are quotes from David Whyte, John Steinbeck, Marc Brackett, Nicole LePera, Kerrie Basha and more. It's a veritable quotefest. You'll be heaps smarter from just listening to this podcast.
There's also giant margaritas and funky wine. Oh, and those cool bikes from that old TV show, CHiPs.
You can find all the links and all the resources here in the newsletter.
Have an awesome week,
Mikey
Welcome to the weekly catch up! It's kinda like Friday drinks with friends, talking about the week - highlights, lessons learned, what we're looking forward to etc., but it's a podcast, because 2021.
In this episode I talk a little bit about what I'm doing here in the US, lay some love on Santa Cruz, figs and French Cider.
I share some insights from Dr Nicole LePera's book, 'How To Do The Work - recognise your patterns, heal from your past and create yourself.'
I share more insights from the great Seth Godin on the difference between making a point and making a difference, and a quote from Bob Dylan on freedom and responsibility.
And I reflect on that powerful conversation I had with Ashanti Branch on the last podcast episode.
You can find more info and links to all of this in the newsletter that accompanies this episode right here.
I first saw Ashanti and learned about the work he does in the documentary, 'The Mask You Live In'. It hit my deep, it moved me and it inspired me. More recently I participated in a workshop he facilitated titled, Taking Off The Mask.
So, what are these masks?
In this episode we talk about what it means to take off the mask. We talk about what masks are – what's on the front of our mask and what's on the back of it. Ashanti shares a few examples of these too from people he's worked with, from teenagers through to adults in their fifties. What's hidden behind these masks are feelings we all share at some stage in our lives.
One of the things I love about Ashanti is that he lives what he teaches, he walks the talk and goes first when it comes to being real, being vulnerable and in doing so he provides a safe place for others to be seen and heard. I think you'll feel that too when you listen to this conversation.
Amongst other things we talk about:
We merely scratch the surface of these and other important topics but I think you'll find this is an incredibly affirming conversation about how we can all connect more with the truth of who we truly are, so that we may connect more with each other.
Links mentioned in this episode:
Ever Forward Club Website
Ever Forward on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter
Join the 100K Masks Challenge and draw yours here for free
Ashanti Branch on Instagram
I've been excited to share this episode with you for some time.
I met Tim when I first arrived in Nicaragua. I went out for a surf with only a few others in the water and there was Tim, having the time of his life, ripping into every wave, cheering on others, full of stoke. I didn't talk to him at that time however, it wasn't until a few days later that I actually met him.
I had found a baby opossum in a bucket of water outside our home, it was drowning and barely clinging on to life. John, who manages Casa Horizon suggested we take it down to a local guy who cares for animals, Tim.
Tim's home is a refuge for sick, injured, orphaned wildlife. It's a small part of the work he does but his dedication to all animals, his commitment and care for biodiversity is not just a philosophy, it's how he lives his life.
I realised that this was not just the guy from the surf, but it was he who is responsible for the turtle egg hatchery on the beach.
I knew we had to chat.
In this episode, amongst other things, we talk about:
It's an inspiring conversation and a wake up call for anyone who cares about animals, the environment or social justice.
You can find out more about Vital Actions here, and become a patron. $10/month will keep this organisation afloat and saving turtles.
Please rate and review this episode, and subscribe here.
And if you enjoyed this episode, please share it - that would mean so much to me and the turtles.
Mikey
John not only wrote the book – Tales of a Modern Nomad, he is the modern nomad. He's also a modern renaissance man – working to bring more play, more creativity, more magic, more conscious connection , awareness, love and laughter into our lives.
I've been living next door to John for the past few weeks and he's full of surprises. He's a singer songwriter, a poet, a yoga and breathwork teacher and co-founder of Momentom Collective. He's spent the last 14 years travelling and sharing his experiences and lessons with others.
In this episode we discussed what it's like to travel the world and facilitate transformational experiences for people in some of the worlds' most inspiring and beautiful locations. We discussed creativity, connection, community and control, and I learned about conscious clowning.
Enjoy this episode, you'll be inspired to back your bags and cultivate some adventure of your own. Meanwhile, I'll be learning how to bring more sacred clowning into my life.
You can find John on Instagram at @johntearly
John's website is www. johnearly.ca
Tales of a Modern Nomad is here
Learn more about Momentom Collective here.
In this episode I share a couple of stories of how appreciation has changed my life. It's a powerful practice, one that is innate but one we may be out of practice in.
I'll show you what appreciation is and how to cultivate more of it in your life.
I shared a quote from John O'Donohue's interview with Krista Tippett on On Being, the link to that episode is here.
The link to the Tim Ferris podcast featuring Greg McKeown I mentioned is here.
You can follow me on Instagram here or contact me via email at hello@mikeyellis.com
In this episode we talk about the power of reflections and I share my experience of focusing on five questions over this past year.
It's typically something you might do at the start of the year or at significant milestones, like birthdays. My birthday is coming up and it's always a time of reflection for me. Some years it's a celebration, other years it's quite difficult.
When you look at where you were, where you are and where you want to be some inconvenient truths arise. And so, we deal with them. Reflecting at times like this is essential to give us perspective and hopefully, become more kind, compassionate and less judgemental with ourselves.
This past 12 months I've used five questions to guide my learning, growth and trajectory. In this episode I reflect on those questions as well as sharing some I have created for myself for the next year ahead - I've listed these below. The source of these questions is a couple of instagram posts from Yumi Sakugawa, I encourage you to check out her work @yumisakugawa.
The five questions I reflect upon are:
And the seven questions I'll be focussing on for this next year are:
If you have any comments or feedback I'd love to hear it - email me at hello@mikeyellis.com or message me on Instagram @mikey.ellis
Until next week, lotsa love.
Mikey
Trigger Warning – this episode includes a conversation about sexual assault, trauma, PTSD and post traumatic growth.
Eleanor contacted me a couple of months ago and said that there was something she'd like to share. I spoke with Eleanor on Episode 24 of this podcast where she shared some of her adventures.
I've always been fascinated by what drives people to do extraordinary things and Eleanor has done plenty of extraordinary things. She has rowed 62 days from California to Hawaii, is the first Australian woman to row the Pacific, she's cycled solo across Europe and is a 2 x world record holder.
I was curious to find out what it is she wanted to share. We didn't prep much for this conversation, I wanted it to be casual and on her terms.
Eleanor opens up about her experience of trauma and how it affected her life in business, in adventures, personally and professionally. She talks about some of the processes and therapy that has helped and her post traumatic growth.
This is a very real and vulnerable conversation. Eleanor talks about sexual assault and the impact it's had on her life then and now. It's an incredibly powerful conversation, one which I was both grateful and humbled to share with Eleanor. It's also an incredibly inspiring conversation and it's a pleasure to witness someone who has found meaning and purpose and is so passionate about helping others.
The list and marker areas of Post Traumatic Growth are:
I hope you too find some strength, some comfort and some inspiration here.
Follow Eleanor on instagram here and you can contact her via her website here, including more information about her keynote, Post Traumatic Growth: Engineering Opportunity Through Adversity.Eleanor mentioned EMDR therapy,here is the online resource to help get connected to an EMDR practitioner (in Australia).
Your Transformation Survival Guide, Week 3.
How are you? I hope you're well and finding some value in this series.
This week we're looking at identity. This will be a theme that we continue to revisit and dive a little deeper each time.
We explore what Esther Perel calls, 'the identity economy'. I'll share some tools I use regularly to help gain insights into myself and others, including:
For the second half of this episode I'm joined by my partner, Katie Akbar, who reads astro charts and shares her insights into how we might use the planets to understand our place in the world a little better.
For more details and links to all the content shared on this episode, subscribe to the newsletter and we can pick up this conversation there.
I hope you enjoyed this one and if you'd like to see the video of us recording this episode, click here.
Cheers!
Mikey
Hey,
Firstly, thanks for listening. I appreciate you being here, sincerely.
This week we're talking about values and boundaries – both are essential if your transformation is going to be sustainable.
I mentioned plenty of resources in this episode, you can find these and more in the corresponding newsletter so make sure you're subscribed to that.
If you're following along at home and doing your homework, I mentioned some journalling prompts which you can find below. Simply write responses to the following:
Let me know how you go with this content and what's resonating for you. I'm on Instagram at @mikey.ellis
Follow Kerrie Basha on Instagram here @bohomofo
*apologies for the echoey audio on this one, I was recording in the bathroom - the only place that wasn't too noisy. #travellingpodcasterlife.
Imagine you were to embark on a journey of transformation and you could only pack a few essentials to take with you – you can't afford to pack anything that's superfluous that would slow you down, only the essentials. This is what I would pack.
In this episode I share 8 x tools and 6 x techniques to support you.
We discuss these tools:
And these techniques:
These are just a few practices that I have tried, tested and still use daily as I navigate through the shadowlands. I would not have journeyed so far, for as long or dived as deep had it not been for these supportive practices. I hope one of these resonates for you and if so – try it on.
As always more details, links and resources in the Newsletter. I'll see you in there.
Go easy on yourself, it's a jungle out there.
Mikey
Are you ready to transform your job, your relationship, your life?
Yes, no?
We're never quite ready enough, but perhaps it's time.
Rather than start at week 1, like any journey of transformation we start where we are - week 0. Here and now.
In this episode I discuss some of the core tenets of this program, it's philosophy, what to expect, who it's for and who it's not.
You will find more details, all the links and resources mentioned in the corresponding newsletter.
Let's go, ready or not.
The past couple of episodes have generated the most responses of all, they certainly appear to have struck a chord. Each of the comments and emails fall into one of two themes, people are saying:
Me too. This past 12 months has been a conscious decoupling from my identity and a commitment to reconditioning and redefining what success looks like, for me. Covid and the forced shutdown and isolation was the catalyst and it's been a turning point in my life as it has for everyone.
The question is, "What am I turning towards?"
There's something quite unique about asking these questions, diving into shadow and embracing potential and possibility at this time, I'm 45. Going through this questioning stage of mid-life at a time when the entire world seems to be doing the same kind of reckoning is a powerful combination.
For me, it's been an incredible catalyst for change. I would normally say it's long overdue change but the truth is, the timing is perfect, it always is. And so now, I live a life more aligned to my values, I live and act with greater integrity and I live in alignment with my purpose. Most of the time. I'm a work in progress as we all are.
As a teacher (and student) for over 20 years, I've learned a few things along the way through experience. And that's what I share in this program.
The Mid Life Crisis Survival Guide
It's 12 weeks, 12 modules, 12 lessons. 3 months to transform you life, or at least survive this crisis. There are three options to get involved.
Until next week, take care and be kind to yourself, and each other.
Lotsa love,
Mikey
This conversation is a follow up to Ep. 65 where I talked about decoupling from your old identity.
This is what happens after you take the leap, after your departure from all that you know.
This is The Waiting Place and it's your initiation.
It can be pretty brutal, I hope these lessons learned help you though.
This is one of those 'so much easier said than done' episodes - decoupling and letting go.
Truth is however, if we want to create something new – a new experience, a new way of life, a new way of being... we need to create space. And we create space by letting go.
That's the 'easier said' bit. The hard part, is the process of letting go and what that brings up. Fear, so much fear! Frustration, disillusionment, resentment, uncertainty... it's a minefield of fears to navigate.
But go there we must.
This episode I explore what that process has been like for me. I hope it helps you as you continue to let go, and learn to swim.
For more discussion and resources on this topic, subscribe to the good newsletter. I put my heart and soul into, it if you like the podcast you're going to love the newsletter.
Subscribe here.
Lotsa love,
Mikey
This is a fascinating question to ask yourself. Take note of the subtle distinction however – I'm not talking about what others require of you, but what is required of you, by you.
What do you need to be doing right now? What does your body require of you, what does your heart require of you? Do you need to stop, to start, to rest, to let go, to launch something, to create, to sleep? Do you need to step up and speak up? Do you need to step back and listen?
This requires a couple of things. Firstly, an awareness of your current experience in the moment. Secondly, it requires some self awareness - how are you actually feeling and what do you need to do to honour these feelings and the process of experiencing them in a way that's best for you?
I mentioned the poem 'Let's Dance' in this episode. You can find the words here and the podcast of me reciting it here.
And if you haven't already, sign up to my newsletter – it will make your day.
Cheers,
Mikey
If you've ever wanted to write, create, make, do, build or launch something and have been too [insert fear here] to do it, you're going to love this book.
The last book summary episode I did was the most popular of all the podcast episodes to date, apparently the format is resonating. So here's another one!
When Seth Godin writes, I read. He has a unique ability to make complex concepts concise and he understands and communicates contemporary culture and its challenges so well. His latest book, The Practice is brilliant - I dare you to read it and to not only be inspired to create something that matters, but to get started immediately.
In this summary I share quotes and highlights from the book, including topics such as:
And so, much, more.
I recorded this 'in the wild' so audio quality is a little different to usual but I reckon you're going to love this one as much as I enjoyed creating it.
Here's a link to Seth's blog and this book.
Lotsa Love,
Mikey
As far as email subject lines go, this one from Ester Perel grabbed my attention – 'Questions that meet people where they are now'. I've learned so much from Ester regarding relationships (much of what I've learned is how much I have to learn, and unlearn) and so I read everything she shares.
This email contained a list of questions to 'meet people where they are now' and there was one that stood out for me, which is the the question for this episode. This past 12 months has changed everything for everyone and so too has our definitions of success changed, or are least they're changing.
Mine certainly has. How about you?
For more on Ester Perel's work click here.
Follow me on Clubhouse @mikeyellis for more thoughtful conversations.
Please subscribe to this podcast, share it with friends, share the love. We need it.
In this episode I try something different. It's not quite a book review, nor is it just a summary. I share plenty of quotes and passages from the book with the intention to provoke thought and stimulate discussion.
This is one of the best books I’ve read on personal development, growth, emotional awareness and generally understanding yourself and how you relate. Reflecting on it while recording this podcast I was reminded just how important this education is right now. And how much this has positively impacted my life at a time when I really need the support and perspective such fundamental truths provide.
I read at least a book a week on these topics and have done for 20 years, and if I was to recommend one book to read, it’s this. I take notes in all books I read and for this one, every second line was highlighted, some were double underlined with brackets, an asterisk and dog eared pages.
In this podcast I work though the five sections of the book and share the passages that resonated for me and I also share why they resonated, we get personal on this one.
Below are the sections and times at which I discuss certain topics if you want to skip ahead – it's a long one but I reckon it's worth a couple of hours of your time.
Here's a link to Alain de Botton's website and a link to The School of Life.
The School of Life YouTube channel has plenty of short videos explaining many of these topics - it's brilliant, check it out. But beware, you'll easily lose a few hours in there!
Chapter Markers
0:02:00 – Intro to the book and author bio
0:08:20 – How I came to this book (a little bit of personal context setting)
0:13:30 – The introduction. Sane Insanity and In Praise of Melancholy
0:19:30 – The School of Life
0:21:10 – Self
0:29:30 – The Importance of a Breakdown
0:38:00 – Others
0:55:20 – A Case for Pessimism (from a recovering naive romantic idealist)
0:57:15 – Vulnerability
0:58:30 – Building Connection (with a hug, a cry or glass of milk), and Listening
1:01:30 – More on Pessimism and Disappointment as a Leisure Activity
1:04:45 – Anxiety
1:09:40 – On the Need to be Alone and Nature as a Teacher
1:14:20 – Relationships and the Failings of Romanticism
1:18:25 – A Post-Romantic Approach to Relationships and Finding a Partner
1:22:30 – How to Know You’re Ready for a Relationship
1:25:15 – Anxious and Avoidant Attachment Styles
1:33:00 – Conversation Starters to Build Connection in Relationships
1:33:45 – Why we Argue
1:36:50 – Marriage
1:40:10 – Work
1:43:00 – Culture
1:44:40 – Wisdom
Michael Bungay-Stanier – 'The Coaching Habit' and 'The Advice Trap'
Esther Perel – 'The State of Affairs'
To subscribe to this podcast or leave a review, please do so here.
One of the all time great questions this one. In fact it's more of a statement starter than a question.
What if...?
It's what comes after this is where the gold is. It challenges our beliefs or presumptions, it opens up possibility. Enjoy indulging in imagination, in potential, in possibilities...
I mentioned a Seth Godin blog post in this episode - here it is.
To subscribe to podcast episodes and blog posts, simply click here.
To leave a review, please do so here.
Cheers,
Michael
It's a couple of weeks into the new year. Do you have big goals, visions and dreams for how you might start?
New year, same you? Yep, me too.
If you're feeling a bit disillusioned already, this episode might help. We talk about the current reality v expectation contrast and how that's messing with your flow. I share a few resources with links below to approaches that might help with
I hope this helps by providing some perspective for you.
Lots of love,
Mikey
Mark Manson's - The surprising science of goal setting and why you’re probably doing it wrong.Dr Jason Fox's -'Choose One Word', ritual for becoming.James Clear's -Atomic Habits (great resource for behaviour change and habit building).
Happy New Year.
There’s no question to answer no lessons to learn, no year to reflect upon. I know you’re all doing that already in your own way.
And there’s no resolutions to make, no goals to set, no declarations of massive change to make.
Instead, just a pause, to acknowledge this present moment. For who you are right now, in this present moment, for all that you’ve become and are, now, for all that you are already, for all you are to be.
What I want to say here now, is that if you are listening to this, thank you. Thank you for sharing the most precious of commodities, your time and attention with me and this community that is fast growing, a conscious community of others just like you and me committed to being better, to doing better, to fearing less and loving more through cultivating self awareness and perhaps even a more satisfied mind.
For now, as one year ends and a new one begins, if possible set aside the weight of expectations, set aside the innate desire to do better next year, let go of that which you regret or wished you had’ve done differently last year. For all that you’ve lost, for that which you’re grieving, for that which you’re celebrating, the best way to acknowledge it all is to simply be with it all in this present moment, to inhale, to pause, to exhale and to pause.
To bear witness to the truth and the beauty inherent in this moment, in you, to wonder at the perfection of it all, including the uncertainty, the tragedy, the triumphs, the loss and the lessons. To wonder at it all. To inhale, pause, exhale, pause.
And repeat.
And continue.
You’re doing a great job.
You’re here, you made it. You won.
And on it goes.
So, Christmas. What at time - It’s certainly a new experience for me, it's winter in lockdown in a small apartment on the other side of the world with my partner who I met online 8 months ago and only met for the first time in person two weeks ago. Love in lockdown, it's been quite the adventure.
How about you? What are you doing, how is your experience? And what are you grateful for? But more specifically, WHO are you grateful for? Who has influenced you, supported you, inspired you, loved you, backed you, helped you...?
Tell them. And don't hold back, be generous with your appreciation and share it with as many people as you can.
This is the currency we need to be spending right now - the currency of kindness and appreciation. Give what you need.
Wherever you are, whatever your circumstances right now, know that you are loved and appreciated.
Merry Christmas.
What is something you accomplished this year – big or small – that you're proud you did?
Let's talk more about that. Let's acknowledge and celebrate these things, the things YOU did despite the clusterfuckery of the circumstances you did it in and the challenges you had to overcome to pull it off.
That needs to be celebrated. Write it down, and when you get on a roll, keep going...
And share it. Share it out loud with someone whose counsel you respect. Share it out loud to yourself - read it back. Stick it on the fridge, frame it, hang it from the Christmas tree, post it on the internet... just make sure you call it out and celebrate it.
You deserve it.
This episode is released on a significant day. It's the 21st of December (and they're ringing the last bells, for the Paul Kelly fans), it's the holiday season, covid is fucking things up, restrictions are imposed, plans are thwarted, we're forced to reflect, it's the great conjunction, the planets are aligning to shake it up even more... it's all happening.
It's a few days before Christmas, most of us are winding down work, planning a break, looking forward to some time with family and friends... and perhaps all of these plans and expectations are thrown into chaos by circumstances out of your control.
What a time.
It might be too soon, but I've been reflecting on what's happened over the past year and the opportunities this has presented to learn, to grow.
It's hard, growing is hard. It's painful, it's uncomfortable, it's unfamiliar, it's scary - fucking terrifying at times.
But there are lessons to be learned. What have you learned, so far?
It's that time of year when we typically reflect on the year that was. And what a year it was. Holy shit. There's just so much that has happened, challenged and changed us. So much.
What of it do you want to leave in 2020 and not carry into 2021? Now is a good time to acknowledge how you've changed, how you've grown, how much you've evolved. With that growth there's some stuff that needs to be left behind. It could be a belief, a story you have on loop, a habit, a friendship or relationship...
Visualise it, verbalise it, make it tangible. Honour it for the lessons it taught, call it out then burn it. Bury it. Set it free, set yourself free.
Let it go as you make space for what you do want.
Whether it be today, this year, a conversation you're having, the relationship you're in, your life – how do you want it to end?
If you have an intention for how you want things to end... the real question is whether what you're doing now is aligned to that outcome?
There's probably something on your heart that you feel strongly about, we'd love to hear it. I'd say that if it's important to you that we need to hear it. Perhaps your uncomfortable sharing it, it's vulnerable sharing what's on your heart. But it's there for a reason - whatever it is that matters to you is important simply because it matters to you. And chances are it matters to others too and they are waiting, wanting for someone to speak up, start a conversation, share what needs to be said.
This question was inspired by a conversation I had with Dan Price, Founder and CEO of Gravity payments, who in 2015 set a minimum wage for all employees at his company of $70,000. The impact this has had on lives is massive. Dan continues to challenge the capitalist system that drives an even greater wedge between the ridiculously wealthy and the increasingly marginalised lower income earners.
For more information on Dan and his work, check out the website here. Follow him on Twitter here, on Instagram here and find his book here.
You might need a coffee, or a stiff drink for this one. Maybe come chamomile tea, or some mushrooms?
We dip our toes into the deep end of awareness, consciousness and what we're making it all mean. This is not about prescribing a practice, it's not about telling you how you should think nor what you should be thinking.
Instead, it's an invitation for you to simply observe what's going on around you and then acknowledge the meaning you're making.
And what stories are you telling as a result – what's the narrative you're creating?
To dive deeper into this I mentioned a couple of books, here's the links:
The Power of Now - Ekhart Tolle
The Untethered Soul - Michael Singer
This question came about via a message from a mate. He was referring to a series of sunrise pics I was sharing a little while back, suggesting I share more, as the people need a reason to rise. That turn of phrase really stuck with me – 'a reason to rise'.
Got me thinking, what's my reason to rise? What's my reason to get out of bed in the morning? What's my reason to stick with the hard things, to lean into fear and frustration, to persevere, to be patient, to do what it takes? What's my reason to rise?
How about you, what's your reason to rise?
It's the choices we make that define our lives. I don't know of a single context or circumstance where this isn't the case. All day every day we're making choices with what options are available to us as to what we'll do, what we wont' do, how we'll respond, what we choose to believe.
It's both liberating and empowering as much as it is perhaps a burden of responsibility. Depends on what choices you're making and whether they're aligned with what you value.
For more information on Peak Persona and the Next Level program click here.
This question is inspired by a series of talks presented by David Whyte. It's a beautiful question.
I speak more about the context of this question and the nature of invitations in this episode. It's a perfect morning question - listen to this before you get out of bed. Or late at night with a glass of wine.
Either way, enjoy exploring the invitation that is being made to you now.
For more information and links to David Whyte's November series I mentioned throughout this episode, click here.
Today's question follows on from yesterday's. It's similar, but there is an important difference – the focus is on the present rather than the future.
Rather than think about our legacy after we've gone, how 'bout now?
What do you want to be known for now?
Is what you're doing aligned with that, in service of that?
So many questions.
Enjoy asking and answering this one with friends and loved ones and the conversation that follows.
My family and friends celebrated the anniversary of Edna May's passing today, 13 years ago she took a bow before heading to the after party to dance the night away. We celebrated her life with some rituals that have become tradition and I reflected on the impact she had on me throughout my life.
It got me thinking about impact, legacy and what I'd like to be remembered for. And not after I'm gone, but more importantly – while I'm here. What do I want to be known and remembered for? To some degree I think we can influence that and a lot of that is out of our control, but it's important to at least be aware of the impact and legacy we're crating now.
How about you, what do you want to be remembered for?
For the past few months my Dad and I have headed down to the beach at 5pm on Friday afternoons for a debrief. We'd chat about the week over a beer and a bag of chips and we'd connect.
It was a precious time.
It was a one-off event that became a tradition for us. I missed doing that this Friday but when I called Dad to see how his week was and debrief over the phone – he was at the beach with Mum, continuing the tradition. It was so beautiful to witness them evolving and sharing this tradition – it had evolved and changed with the times and circumstances.
These rituals and traditions are so important to me. How about you? What's a ritual or tradition that's important to you? Is it something you've established, or is it one you've inherited?
I'd love to hear about it, how it came about and what it means to you.
Home.
What does it mean for you?
Is it a place, a person, a context, a time, a feeling? It's been fascinating to reflect on this over the past few months and redefine or at least question what home means.
I'd love to hear what home means for you?
We receive plenty of feedback and advice throughout the day – from others, and even from ourselves. We have to be selective with regards to what advice we take on board, for as well intentioned as some of it may be, it's not always what we need to hear.
I wonder what advice your future self would give you, assuming you've learned, grown, evolved and become a better person as a result of whatever it is you're currently experiencing. What advice would that version of yourself give you now, that might help put things into perspective?
Before 2020 went ahead and 2020'd everyone, there was a lot of speculation about 'The Future of Work' – what that would look like, what skills would be required and how we might prepare for it.
Then everything changed, especially work and our priorities.
I acknowledge that at this time there are too many people who simply either don't have a job, any job, or the opportunity to choose what kind of work they're doing.
But we can dream, and this question is an invitation to dream and indulge a little. If you've survived 2020 so far, you deserve at least that.
Good Morning!
It feels like there's not been a lot to look forward to lately, so much doomscrolling and negativity bias. Sure, we have plenty to fix, and there is plenty to look forward to also.
What are you looking forward to?
I get amped just thinking about this, talking about this, sharing the good vibes and all the things we have to be grateful for, to look forward to, the things we're hoping go bring to life.
It feels good to talk about these things.
And feeling good is a good thing, let's do more of that eh?
Have an awesome day, dreaming.
Good Morning.
Forgiveness is an exercise in compassion, for yourself. It's a conscious and deliberate letting go of resentment that may be harming you emotionally, psychologically and even physiologically.
It's not admitting defeat or surrender, nor does it condone what happened. Instead, it can be a liberating experience where you get to choose what to let go and leave behind.
It may be someone else you need to forgive, it may be yourself.
This question may trigger some trauma, please listen with caution.
Good Morning.
This is a big one, an important question. In this episode I talk about the difference between what matters to you and what you value. The point being, that it's not what we say we value but what we do and whether values and behaviours are aligned.
There is a second part to this question which I also dig into further in this episode. I'd love for you to have a listen and let me know what comes up for you as a result of these questions.
These are important questions to ask and conversations to have, especially with those people that matter most to you.
Sending you lotsa love with this one.
Good Morning!
You're going to do plenty of things today. Why not make one of them really matter by doing something courageous?
Could be big, could be small, could be courageous.
It'll most likely take some vulnerability. It most likely won't be easy.
And it will almost certainly be worth it.
I mentioned Alexandra Franzen in this episode, check out her work and writing here.
Good Morning!
With so much happening, with our senses being saturated by stimulus, what do you focus on?
What we focus on matters and it's something we have more control over than you might think, literally.
What you're focussing on will influence what you think about, what you feel, what you do, what you believe. And vice-versa– what you believe will influence what you focus upon. The point here is to simply be aware of it all.
Have an awesome day.
I think it's a tragedy that too many people go through life not knowing the positive impact they've had on others' lives. Often it's not until it's too late that we really make a point of acknowledging the people who have helped us, who love us, who we appreciate.
Today, make a point of thanking that person.
You'll never know how much they might need to hear it.
Life feels a bit serious at the moment.
I get it, there's a lot going on.
But I think we've forgotten to have fun, to do those things that feel good, that bring joy. I wonder if there's even a feeling of guilt around making time to have fun, instead of being more optimised or productive and working harder.
If ever there was a time when we need to connect with those things, those activities, that music, those people that bring joy to your life, it's now.
What does that look like for you?
What brings you joy, that you've not done for too long?
Dixon Patten is a proud Yorta Yorta and Gunnai man and Founder, Director at Bayila Creative.
In this conversation we covered plenty of ground and we went deep. One of the themes that ran through this conversation was connection. Dixon shares what connection means for him, how this translates to his work, to his art and the way in which he works with clients. We talk about his process and how important, how essential it is to take time, to allow space for art to be expressed.
We talk about what it means to connect, to self, to others, to country.
We talk about some of the challenges around identity he experienced growing up and how that has influenced his work and the work he’s doing now with young, emerging artists and how we can support more aboriginal owned businesses.
Towards the end of this conversation Dixon shared some lessons learned through loss, and the grieving process.
This conversation had a huge impact on me and has changed how I think about work and how we do it, especially when it comes to how we spend time and what we spend it on.
Please make some time and space for this conversation, it deserves it.
You can find Dixon's work here www.bayila.com.au and follow him on Instagram here @green_eyed_turtle _
If you'd like to share some feedback please contact me via instagram here @mikey.ellis or via the website www.mikeyellis.com
And please share this episode, it's an important conversation.
The most valuable commodity is time.
How are you spending it?
Is it an investment, or sunk cost expenditure?
And is how you're spending your time aligned with your intentions for what how you want to live, aligned with what truly matters to you?
So many questions, so little time!
This question was inspired by a conversation I had with Dixon Patten of Bayila. That conversation will be published soon in another episode, look out for it, it's full of so much truth, integrity and wisdom.
We spoke about tall poppy syndrome and what a waste it is when we don't acknowledge or share what it is that we love, what we love to do, what makes us great.
Today's question relates to that thing you know you need to do, but aren't, yet. Perhaps for fear of failure or not getting it right, or not being ready or 'good enough'. What is that niggle you're ignoring, what's that guidance in your gut that's encouraging you do to something important?
Fuck it. Do it. We need you to.
What do you know, that you're pretending not to know?
Good Morning!
This question comes from the great Michael Bungay-Stanier, whose book The Coaching Habit is the best book I've read on coaching – buy it, read it, you'll be a better person for it.
For more info on Michael's work visit his 'Box of Crayons' website here.
Buy the book here.
And do some great work through asking better questions. There is perhaps no better question than this one.
Have an awesome day!
Good Morning!
This is one of my favourite questions, for a few reasons:
It a generous and humble question - it's a offer to help without the assumption or presumption that you know exactly how to help.
It's an invitation – it's easy to brush off an offer to help by saying, "Nah, I'm all good thanks". With this question, instead of asking whether you can help, it's an invitation for the other to share how you can help.
It's elegant and efficient. Rather than tip-toeing around vulnerability, it cuts straight to identifying the need, sharing it and then hopefully having that need met.
It's a beautiful question for both the asker and the recpient. It's a gift for both of you.
Have an awesome day.
When it comes to doing that thing you know you need to do, that thing you want to do... this is a rhetorical question.
The answer is in how you feel responding to it as you rattle off a list of fears dressed up as excuses.
You know what you need to do.
So go do it.
What are you waiting for?
Your new life is going to cost you your old one. Time to create space, to let go.
What are you letting go of?
Good Morning.
Today we're stepping back and looking at all that's happened recently, acknowledging both what we've lost and what we've gained.
We've all lost plenty this year – collectively and individually, we're faced with that reality daily. When grieving loss or weighing up choices, changes, challenges – it's easy to quantify what we've lost or what we stand to lose. It's not always as easy to see what it is we have to gain.
I wonder what it is you've gained as a result of recent loss.
It's a pretty sobering question for first thing in the morning.
Or is it?
I find questions like this inspiring and a really important pattern disrupt whereby we're reminded of a few things. Such as the value of time, and the fact we can take it for granted and assume we have enough time to do all those important things we'd been waiting for, waiting for the 'right time'.
How about now?
What would you do if you had 3 months to live? This question sure helps put the things we value into perspective pretty quickly.
What would you do? I'd love to hear from you – send me a message on Insta @mikey.ellis or twitter @mikeyellis.13 and you can always subscribe to receive these questions on the daily.
Have an awesome day doing some of those things you'd been waiting for the right time to do.
The time is now.
Oh, and here's that book I mentioned from Alexandra Franzen.
Good Morning!
Is it just me, or does anyone else feel like life is constantly, incessantly demanding your attention? With so many invites for events, for catch ups, for meetings, for zoom calls, for donations, for your time, your energy...
It's not always easy to say no. But it feels good. And it establishes and reinforces boundaries which are essential.
This question came from a deck of cards called We're Not Really Strangers – it's a purpose driven card game and movement all about empowering meaningful connections. You can check out the deck here.
You can subscribe to these episodes to be delivered via email here.
If you like this question and think someone you know would like to hear it too, please share this with them, I appreciate that so much.
And as always, I'd love to hear your feedback and how you're incorporating these questions into your daily ritual.
Have an awesome day.
In this episode I introduce a new series of questions. These are questions I've asked myself and pondered, they're a wonderful insight into new perspectives, into new awareness and truths.
I ask questions like this in the morning, perhaps you'd like to do the same. This episode is an invitation to do that.
Enjoy the adventure!
Eleanor Carey considers herself an ordinary person. She just so happens to have done some rather extraordinary things. Like rowing a boat across the Pacific Ocean, riding a bike across Europe and founding a company that takes people on overnight adventures to show just how easy it all can be.
We talk about how an email and following her gut ended up with her being one of a crew of three women - the youngest crew of three to ever row an ocean. Eleanor shares how that experience shaped her and how she survived after having spent the first 11 days at sea not being able to hold any food down, while rowing in 3 hr shifts, around the clock.
It's an incredible story and Eleanor is a gifted storyteller. She's also extremely humble and a resounding message I took away from this conversation is that adventure can be found a lot closer to home than we may think.
For lovers of grand adventures, of travel, of pushing the limitations of mind and body – you're going to love this conversation.
Links
You can find Eleanor on Instagram here. On twitter here and the Vokser website is here.
The wonderful documentary of Eleanor's Pacific Ocean row, 'Why Row an Ocean?' is here.
Some of the people that have inspired Eleanor:
My most significant + impactful book and doco – Losing Sight Of Shore documentary. This is the one that convinced me to row the ocean, absolutely pivotal.
Cycling Home From Siberia by Rob Lilwall book. The original book that made me cycle across Europe.
Fave adventurers to follow online:
Alastair Humphreys
Anna McNuff – Instagram and Facebook
Best adventure podcast:
The Tough Girl Podcast by Sarah Williams
A few years ago I met Lou McCann while interviewing her for a job. The job didn't end up happening but a wonderful friendship did. Formalities aside, it was in talking with Lou that I heard about a brilliant idea she had. It was inspired, it was important and it had the potential to change lives.
So we sat down and discussed it further and I encouraged her to make it happen despite the fear. I could see how important this was to Lou and the people she would go on to support. Soon after, Moody was launched and 4 years later, we sat down to chat about how it's all played out since.
Lou wears her heart on her sleeve and doesn't hold back sharing the challenges, the doubts, fears and frustrations she's experienced through launching this business, starting a family, losing her mother and riding out lockdown in Melbourne. She also shares the reasons why this means so much to her and the motivation for it all.
It's powerful stuff. I hope you enjoy this conversation as much as I did and find some inspiration to go do that thing you're being drawn to.
Check out Moody's website here.
Follow the Moody story on Instagram.
Here's a link to Royal Women's Centre for Women's Mental Heath.
A link to PANDA (Perinatal Anxiety & Depression Australia ) is here.
And here's a link to GLOW NI is here.
It's been a while in between episodes. In the spirit of progress over perfection, doing that thing that you love even before you think it's ready or even worth sharing... here's episode 22!
Do you ever feel like you have eleventy thousand things you want to do, to say, to create, to share... and end up feeling kinda overwhelmed and doing nothing?
Me too. So that's what this episode is about - doing the thing. I share some of a beautiful text message conversation I had with a dear friend regarding the wondrous documentary, My Octopus Teacher. If you haven't seen it, stop reading this, pause the podcast and watch it immediately.
I mentioned Susan Jeffers' book, 'Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway'. It's been about 8 years since I read it but I remember it having a big impact on me. Check it out.
Something I wrote that I was reluctant to share, is this poem, 'Let's Dance'.
And if you'd like to subscribe to my newsletter that I will send out one day (trust me, it'll be worth the wait!), you can do that here.
Lotsa love to you all!
Mikey
I appreciate you.
When was the last time you heard someone say that, and how did it make you feel?
We need to acknowledge and share appreciation now, more than ever. Appreciating something or someone and sharing that, has the power to change lives, save lives or at least help someone feel better. And that's a good thing, we need that.
It's simple, it's free, it's a win / win outcome and an antidote to the fear and overwhelming uncertainty that we're all experiencing right now.
I mentioned Eddie Jaku in this episode, check out the interview here.
Now, go make someone's day!
I had the pleasure of working as a tour guide for Brian Duncan in his business, Uncle Brian's - Fun, Falls and Forest tour in Cairns. It was one of the best years of my life and I learned first-hand the power of moments and shared experiences.
Not only did I have a helluva lot of fun leading those groups, but I developed a deep connection with the World Heritage listed tropical rainforests of North Queensland and an insight into human behaviour across various cultures.
The experience was life changing, not just for me but for so many people who had the pleasure of spending a day on Gus the Bus. In this episode Brian shares the inspiration behind the tour, how he came to be known as Uncle Brian and shares some stories about the characters and moments that made this such a memorable experience.
For more info on Friends of Himalayan Children, click here.
Yesterday I had a coaching conversation with a client who was stuck making a decision. Overthinking it, catastrophising and idealising various outcomes, paralysed by what to do next. Tricky little fucker ego is hey! This was compounded by the need to make the 'right' decision according to everyone else's arbitrary and subjective judgements.
Cue overwhelm, paralysis, frustration and anxiety.
Can you relate? I can.
What to do?
Just do something, one step. And don't worry about what others think 'cause they're not thinking about you're worried they're thinking about.
In this episode I share a few perspectives on how to approach decision making for the notoriously indecisive, and how to not worry so much about what others think for the people pleasers amongst us.
I've been a fan of Cy Wakeman's work for the past few years. Her New York Times bestselling book, 'No Ego' and her 'reality based leadership' methodology has changed the way I work and understand the role of personal and professional development, coaching and leadership in the workplace.
She has a unique ability to cut through the bullshit to connect and share heart to heart. Her philosophy and methodology is exactly the kind of approach we need right now, one that demands accountability, truth telling, empathy, vulnerability and integrity.
In this episode Cy shares her methodology and some really simple yet powerful ways to help you cut through ego, develop greater self awareness and not only have a greater positive impact at work, but to have live a more loving, compassionate and conscious life.
It might be messy, but it's worth it.
For more of Cy's wisdom, check out her 'No Ego' podcast here.
And check out her 'Reality Based Leadership' work here.
We wrap up this short six-part series by looking at integrity and integration. It's one thing to develop awareness and understanding, it's another to live it.
In this episode I look at what integrity means and how we might develop greater alignment between what we think, what we believe, what we say and do. This is where we bring to life and deploy our awareness and understanding.
Integrity is living what we know, where we practice what we preach and learn through doing. I share examples of how to develop greater integrity with reference to the work of teachers such as Martha Beck and her 'Integrity Cleanse'.
This is an honest look at the value and importance of personal integrity and is full of practical ways in which you can develop yours.
In this episode we look at what we're doing with all this awareness and understanding we're developing and ask, what are you creating?
Who are you co-creating with?
What is it you're manifesting and how much control, input, influence or impact are you having on what's going on around you?
Good questions, don't you think?
In order to become more of who we want to be, of who we truly are – we need to let go of who we've become.
This episode of the Conscious Culture series looks at how we might do that.
Carly is a self-confessed expert in death and dying, she's come close on several occasions. In this raw and vulnerable conversation Carly shares the brutal reality of what it means to live with Cystic Fibrosis, to have had a lung transplant followed by cancer, and to be surrounded by death your entire life.
It's a heavy topic. But Carly is anything but – she shares her experience with such humility, honesty and with a very healthy dose of humour and a perspective that is truly remarkable.
Follow Carly and Billie on Instagram at @carlyjaymetcalfe for behind the scenes pics.
Watch her Ted talk here: Learning to Die - Carly Jay Metcalfe at TedX Brisbane
Subscribe to this podcast here.
Everything is changing, we need to adapt. So how do we do this?
Show up.
Do the work.
Do the best we can with what we've got.
This episode is raw, freestyle, as is.
It's shared with the intention of facilitating greater understanding. Of self, and others.
Understanding beyond:
Understanding ourselves and each other, so that we might connect more meaningfully.
We need this now more than ever.
How do I introduce my next guest? For those of you who know me, you’ll know how important my Dad is in my life. From the youngest of ages, from my earliest memories he’s not only been my father, he’s been my mentor, my teacher and my best mate.
He, along with my Mum, has taught me more than anyone else, and what I’m so grateful for is how he’s done it. He’s taught me what it means to be a good man, a good human, through the example he’s set, through his actions first as well as his words.
He has the biggest heart of anyone I know, he’s humble, gracious, selfless and compassionate and he’s honest, he has the most integrity of anyone I know.
In this episode, we dig deep into Dad's early life as he talks about some of the challenges he experienced growing as one of nine children.
We talk about his early working life after leaving school at 13 years of age, his various careers and his more recent years as a Grandfather and Great-Grandfather.
He shares lessons learned, wisdom earned and how he'd like to be remembered.
This conversation deserves one of your best bottles of wine, so pour a big glass and enjoy getting to know one of the all time greats, Poppy G.
Insta: @george.ellis42
*Trigger warning: this podcast involves a discussion of domestic violence.
In this episode, the second of this conscious culture series I’m doing each Tuesday, we’re talking about awareness. As far as I’m concerned, unless we are aware of what’s happening within, unless we’re aware of what we’re thinking, what we’re feeling, what we’re experiencing, we can't change it.
And things need to change – lives and the future of our planet depends upon it. In order to change, to grow, to create something new, something better, we must have an awareness of where we are and how we got here if we are to be able to change it.
The greater our awareness – the more sensory acuity, cognitive and conscious awareness we have, the easier it’s going to be to calibrate and navigate our way through, and to, a better future – a more just, fair, equal, compassionate and conscious future.
We look at the four paradigms of awareness:
And we explore our instruments of awareness:
In order to do the work we're called to do right now, we must have a greater awareness of what we're bringing to the table. This episode features plenty of practical tools to use to cultivate your awareness.
For more episode notes and links, subscribe to my newsletter at mikeyellis.com
Creativity. What is it and how do we do it? Do we do it, or is it who we are?
In this episode we talk all things creativity. What I love most about this conversation is we look at how to redefine creativity and challenge our assumptions and identities about what 'being creative' or what 'being a creative person' is.
We discuss:
This guy is the real deal. His book 'Everyday Creative - A Dangerous Guide to Making Magic at Work' is essential reading for your ever-evolving quest for self expression and creative inspiration.
I hope you enjoy this conversation as much as I did with the facilitator of fabulousness, the curious curator and champion of courageous creativity, Mykel Dixon.
The way we work is changing, it has changed and these are big changes. We need conscious leaders who will guide us through these times, towards are more compassionate, creative, diverse and inclusive future. How are you changing and what role will you play in this evolution?
In this episode we look at a new world of work and how we might design a more conscious workplace culture. This conscious culture needs champions, it needs leaders – courageous souls to lead by example.
If you're curious about what a more conscious culture is and how you might help bring about the change we so desperately need, this episode is for you.
We'll look at five stages of growth necessary for this change on both a personal and professional level:
The future of work is our to create, and the work begins now.
You're going to need a stiff drink and a comfy chesterfield for this one, ideally you'd be seated next to a cosy fire with some flickering candle light dancing around the room. I love what Jason Fox writes, I love how he thinks and this conversation is an insight into what makes him such a great conversationalist.
We start by talking about making meaningful progress, future relevance, setting the torch to everything you've done and starting again. We meander through awakening from the meaning crisis, interconnected dividuals, ritual, relevance, insight porn and epistemological humility.
I love this conversation so much. I'm sure you will too. Links to references in this episode are below.
It's time for a change. Normal is broken and there's no 'going back'. At least I'm not, and I reckon there's plenty of you out there who feel the same.
So let's create a new normal.
In this episode I introduce a new Tuesday podcast series that I'll share each week for the next few months. Each episode will feature a lesson in self awareness and how what we can do as individuals to contribute to a better future.
I share what has happened for me over the past few months, lessons learned and how we might apply these together.
Trigger warning: this episode contains conversations about depression and suicide.
If you've not heard about Kath Koschel and the work she's doing, you will. She's making the world a better place, one act of kindness at a time. In this episode we dig into her personal story and it's one of the most incredible stories of adversity, resilience and courage I've heard.
Kath has transformed her life threatening challenges into a global kindness movement. She is one of the toughest, most courageous, brave, hardworking, humble and genuine people you'll meet. Kath has founded the Kindness Factory – an organisation and global movement that promotes kindness around the world. She's developed a curriculum that teaches kindness in schools, she's broken world records, she's an elite athlete in multiple sports, a Pride of Australia Medal recipient amongst so many other achievements. Oh, and she's training to swim the English Channel.
When you hear about what she's gone through to get here, you'll appreciate why she's such an inspiration.
Kath's drink pairing for this episode: Peach Kombucha
Kaths' soundtrack for this episode: 'Send Me On My Way' – Rusted Root
For more info, check out www.kindnessfactory.com and @kindnessfactory on Instagram.
This is a conversation about living well and leaving a legacy that impacts lives for generations to come.
We're not great at talking about grief, it's difficult. And so when Tracey said she'd be honoured to discuss her experience and share the story of her daughter, Kiara, I was humbled.
And so we chatted. The lessons learned though heartbreak and loss are perhaps the most powerful. In this conversation I was reminded of how precious life is, how much of it we waste in worrying about the past and the future, and that the best way to deal with it all is to love hard.
Sometimes things are just a bit shit, and that's OK.
Sometimes you need to make a pot of tea.
Sometimes it's a shot of tequila, and that's OK too.
Sometimes you might need to crank Rage Against the Machine, loud.
It's all OK.
Even when it's not.
This episode is a reminder of that.
Stories are everywhere, and they have the power to change lives. What's yours? What would you like to share? Please share, you never know who needs to hear it.
There are three elements to a story - the story itself, the storyteller and the audience. In this episode I look at how to make the most of each.
And wine, there is wine.
Cheers.
In this episode I share a story that changed the way I see life and set me on the path to uncover, understand and share stories about what truly matters.
You've gotta start somewhere, right? Getting started, hitting 'launch', putting that thing you care about out there into the world, it's daunting. So here it is, a podcast for the curious – for those of you who want to know more about why it is we do what we do, so that we all might live a little more consciously and treat ourselves, each other and this planet with love.