In keeping with my annual tradition (2024, 2023, 2022, 2021, 2020, 2019, 2018 2017, 2016, 2015, 2014, 2013, 2012, 2011, 2010, 2009, 2008), this New Year’s Eve I’m reflecting on everything that’s happened this year.
In January, I friend-broke-up with Amanda because she took Kye’s side in the divorce. I met a cool person named Alecia. I studied for and passed the AWS Solutions Architect – Associate exam, because all the job postings I was seeing wanted AWS skills. And I wrote a creepy, short (600-word) sci-fi/horror story inspired by Severance, called Pattern Interrupt.
In February, I did a bunch of job hunting and acquired some weird skin condition. It’s not contagious, but it makes me break out in itchy rashes that keep me up at night about 2-3 times a week. It makes my life significantly worse.
In March, I did a bunch of job hunting and worked on RhymeCrime a bunch to sharpen my Ruby skillz and flesh out my portfolio.
In April, I did a bunch of job hunting, dated a Franciscan friar, and wrote a short (900-word) sci-fi story inspired by The OA and Sword Art Online, called We’re Missing Something.
In May, I got a job at Later! Final job hunt statistics:
In June, Rope Club fizzled out.
In July, I asked Citadel to move out because I wanted Benedicta to move in. Also, I achieved a once-in-a-lifetime feat: I casually tossed an ice cube into the sink and it went “floop”… because it hit the rubber bit of the garbage disposal and no metal
In August, maddi came to visit for a few days. I saw a dermatologist about my itchy rash. She was worse than useless; she didn’t help but did misgender me.
In September, Kerri returned home from her summer of motorcycle adventures. I finally moved my website to paceheart.com. Pyre and Wren came to visit; we played Blue Prince and Abiotic Factor, and watched Kevin Can Fuck Himself.
In October, I had a mostly useless dermatologist followup. The itching continues. Kerri and I failed to go to Meow Wolf. I started dating Lulu/Moss, and Benedicta moved in!
In November, Citadel moved out, two of my friends/exes didn’t get married, and I saw a dog garage! I started playing Beat Saber again; I was ranked 6200nd and I set a goal of making it into the top 6000 by the end of the year. Last but not least, I edited and published a document about my and others’ experiences in Living Love Revolution, that Aphrodite Temple group I joined and escaped in 2023 after realizing the toxic, cult-like power dynamics and the narcissistic behavior patterns of the leader, Teri Ciacchi. Feathers were ruffled.
In December, Skyline came to visit and we learned that people with ADHD, if they’re not on stimulants, can smell ants. I achieved my Beat Saber goal!
Also, I finally started to worry about AI. Previously, my rebuttal was that AIs didn’t do anything, they just answered questions. Sure, they can manipulate people to some extent, but if the questions are coming from a human then there’s only so much manipulation that can occur. But with the rise of AI agents, now there are oodles of LLMs doing things with little to no human supervision and woefully insufficient safeguards. LLMs are black boxes; we don’t (and can’t!) understand why they do what they do. We’re basically summoning demons (daemons?) and naively hoping that our dinky little chalk circles will be enough to protect us. We desperately need something like Cyc.My second-favorite video game was Clair Obscur: Expedition 33, and my fave was Blue Prince. My favorite visual media was Pantheon, Dispatches From Elsewhere, and The Orville.
My word for the year was “nourish”: caring for both my present self and my future self. In particular, I had 3 areas I intended to nourish in 2025:
I rocked 2.5 out of 3 of those.
I started 2025 unemployed, and there were days when I felt hopeless and couldn’t motivate myself to do anything. But then there were other days when I searched for jobs, asked for help, and figured out what to do differently. It’s been 25 years since I job hunted, and I did it! I’m getting better at remembering that the hopelessness is temporary.
I did a good job of adulting! (and I intend to do even better next year)
Fuck yeah
I fought two good fights against narcissists and their splash damage: Teri and a friend of a friend who picked up some tricks from their narcissistic parent. That wasn’t even on the list!
I seriously considered making my 2026 word of the year “dermatology” because omg I have got to fix this constant itching oh please make it stop
But no – my word of the year for 2026 is dashboard. Someone once compared life with ADHD to riding a bike down a really steep hill. In 2026, I’m going to create a pit stop for that bike. I’ll pull all my to-do and could-do items into one dashboard, and then create a system and a process to check it frequently. This is going to help me feel (and be!) on top of my life instead of constantly behind and free falling. I might even end up with a system that’ll be useful to others, too!